#Development banking

[bedupolker]

So, I'm friends with someone who runs the freezing and storage side of a sperm bank, and she has often complained to me about the drama and flaking and paperwork snafus involved with "known donors", like your mouseworld couple calling in a brother. I don't know if you had any plans to explore that as a complete story, but know that if you do, the soil there is rich.

Honestly everything I know about sperm banks I've learned through sitcoms and I'm intrigued by your friend's stories

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Shifting $677m from the banks to the people, every year, forever

I'll be in TUCSON, AZ from November 8-10: I'm the GUEST OF HONOR at the TUSCON SCIENCE FICTION CONVENTION.

"Switching costs" are one of the great underappreciated evils in our world: the more it costs you to change from one product or service to another, the worse the vendor, provider, or service you're using today can treat you without risking your business.

Businesses set out to keep switching costs as high as possible. Literally. Mark Zuckerberg's capos send him memos chortling about how Facebook's new photos feature will punish anyone who leaves for a rival service with the loss of all their family photos – meaning Zuck can torment those users for profit and they'll still stick around so long as the abuse is less bad than the loss of all their cherished memories:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2021/08/facebooks-secret-war-switching-costs

It's often hard to quantify switching costs. We can tell when they're high, say, if your landlord ties your internet service to your lease (splitting the profits with a shitty ISP that overcharges and underdelivers), the switching cost of getting a new internet provider is the cost of moving house. We can tell when they're low, too: you can switch from one podcatcher program to another just by exporting your list of subscriptions from the old one and importing it into the new one:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/10/16/keep-it-really-simple-stupid/#read-receipts-are-you-kidding-me-seriously-fuck-that-noise

But sometimes, economists can get a rough idea of the dollar value of high switching costs. For example, a group of economists working for the Consumer Finance Protection Bureau calculated that the hassle of changing banks is costing Americans at least $677m per year (see page 526):

https://files.consumerfinance.gov/f/documents/cfpb_personal-financial-data-rights-final-rule_2024-10.pdf

The CFPB economists used a very conservative methodology, so the number is likely higher, but let's stick with that figure for now. The switching costs of changing banks – determining which bank has the best deal for you, then transfering over your account histories, cards, payees, and automated bill payments – are costing everyday Americans more than half a billion dollars, every year.

Now, the CFPB wasn't gathering this data just to make you mad. They wanted to do something about all this money – to find a way to lower switching costs, and, in so doing, transfer all that money from bank shareholders and executives to the American public.

And that's just what they did. A newly finalized Personal Financial Data Rights rule will allow you to authorize third parties – other banks, comparison shopping sites, brokers, anyone who offers you a better deal, or help you find one – to request your account data from your bank. Your bank will be required to provide that data.

I loved this rule when they first proposed it:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/06/10/getting-things-done/#deliverism

And I like the final rule even better. They've really nailed this one, even down to the fine-grained details where interop wonks like me get very deep into the weeds. For example, a thorny problem with interop rules like this one is "who gets to decide how the interoperability works?" Where will the data-formats come from? How will we know they're fit for purpose?

This is a super-hard problem. If we put the monopolies whose power we're trying to undermine in charge of this, they can easily cheat by delivering data in uselessly obfuscated formats. For example, when I used California's privacy law to force Mailchimp to provide list of all the mailing lists I've been signed up for without my permission, they sent me thousands of folders containing more than 5,900 spreadsheets listing their internal serial numbers for the lists I'm on, with no way to find out what these lists are called or how to get off of them:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/07/22/degoogled/#kafka-as-a-service

So if we're not going to let the companies decide on data formats, who should be in charge of this? One possibility is to require the use of a standard, but again, which standard? We can ask a standards body to make a new standard, which they're often very good at, but not when the stakes are high like this. Standards bodies are very weak institutions that large companies are very good at capturing:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/30/weak-institutions/

Here's how the CFPB solved this: they listed out the characteristics of a good standards body, listed out the data types that the standard would have to encompass, and then told banks that so long as they used a standard from a good standards body that covered all the data-types, they'd be in the clear.

Once the rule is in effect, you'll be able to go to a comparison shopping site and authorize it to go to your bank for your transaction history, and then tell you which bank – out of all the banks in America – will pay you the most for your deposits and charge you the least for your debts. Then, after you open a new account, you can authorize the new bank to go back to your old bank and get all your data: payees, scheduled payments, payment history, all of it. Switching banks will be as easy as switching mobile phone carriers – just a few clicks and a few minutes' work to get your old number working on a phone with a new provider.

This will save Americans at least $677 million, every year. Which is to say, it will cost the banks at least $670 million every year.

Naturally, America's largest banks are suing to block the rule:

https://www.americanbanker.com/news/cfpbs-open-banking-rule-faces-suit-from-bank-policy-institute

Of course, the banks claim that they're only suing to protect you, and the $677m annual transfer from their investors to the public has nothing to do with it. The banks claim to be worried about bank-fraud, which is a real thing that we should be worried about. They say that an interoperability rule could make it easier for scammers to get at your data and even transfer your account to a sleazy fly-by-night operation without your consent. This is also true!

It is obviously true that a bad interop rule would be bad. But it doesn't follow that every interop rule is bad, or that it's impossible to make a good one. The CFPB has made a very good one.

For starters, you can't just authorize anyone to get your data. Eligible third parties have to meet stringent criteria and vetting. These third parties are only allowed to ask for the narrowest slice of your data needed to perform the task you've set for them. They aren't allowed to use that data for anything else, and as soon as they've finished, they must delete your data. You can also revoke their access to your data at any time, for any reason, with one click – none of this "call a customer service rep and wait on hold" nonsense.

What's more, if your bank has any doubts about a request for your data, they are empowered to (temporarily) refuse to provide it, until they confirm with you that everything is on the up-and-up.

I wrote about the lawsuit this week for @eff@mastodon.social's Deeplinks blog:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2024/10/no-matter-what-bank-says-its-your-money-your-data-and-your-choice

In that article, I point out the tedious, obvious ruses of securitywashing and privacywashing, where a company insists that its most abusive, exploitative, invasive conduct can't be challenged because that would expose their customers to security and privacy risks. This is such bullshit.

It's bullshit when printer companies say they can't let you use third party ink – for your own good:

https://arstechnica.com/gadgets/2024/01/hp-ceo-blocking-third-party-ink-from-printers-fights-viruses/

It's bullshit when car companies say they can't let you use third party mechanics – for your own good:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/09/03/rip-david-graeber/#rolling-surveillance-platforms

It's bullshit when Apple says they can't let you use third party app stores – for your own good:

https://www.eff.org/document/letter-bruce-schneier-senate-judiciary-regarding-app-store-security

It's bullshit when Facebook says you can't independently monitor the paid disinformation in your feed – for your own good:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/08/05/comprehensive-sex-ed/#quis-custodiet-ipsos-zuck

And it's bullshit when the banks say you can't change to a bank that charges you less, and pays you more – for your own good.

CFPB boss Rohit Chopra is part of a cohort of Biden enforcers who've hit upon a devastatingly effective tactic for fighting corporate power: they read the law and found out what they're allowed to do, and then did it:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/23/getting-stuff-done/#praxis

The CFPB was created in 2010 with the passage of the Consumer Financial Protection Act, which specifically empowers the CFPB to make this kind of data-sharing rule. Back when the CFPA was in Congress, the banks howled about this rule, whining that they were being forced to share their data with their competitors.

But your account data isn't your bank's data. It's your data. And the CFPB is gonna let you have it, and they're gonna save you and your fellow Americans at least $677m/year – forever.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/11/01/bankshot/#personal-financial-data-rights

[itneverendshere]

you said i have to trust more freely - r.c series (four)

requested here; (one); (two); three

pairing: rafe x pogue!reader(the duff inspired) word count: 5k

Why did it feel like his stomach dropped out his ass when Nate showed up? 

It wasn’t like he actually expected you to choose him over Nate. The guy was practically perfect—your textbook version of what a guy should be. Clean, nice, predictable. The opposite of him.

But watching you hesitate like you were weighing your options right in front of him? That hurt like a bitch and he hated how much it did.

He couldn’t shake that look in your eyes.

Like you weren’t sure what you wanted anymore. While every time you were around, he didn’t know what the hell he was doing. It’d been like that since the beginning, even back at that party when you tossed your drink in his face after he called you that stupid fucking name. He could still remember the way you glared at him, cheeks flushed and eyes blazing. He’d been a cocky little shit, sure, but that fire in you? It hooked him.

Yeah, he liked messing with you. Always had. But lately, it didn’t feel like just messing around anymore. It felt different. It felt like he was doing it because he didn’t know how else to get close to you.

And now Nate was here, acting like he had some claim. Offering you lunch like it was some kind of test. Rafe should’ve laughed it off. Should’ve let you go. But instead, he was standing there, watching the whole thing go down, and all he wanted to do was grab you by the hand and pull you out of there. Away from Nate. 

Away from all this... bullshit. There he was, full-on spiraling because of a girl. Because of you.

He knew he was developing feelings, had been knowing, which terrified him because it was unfamiliar territory—he was used to being in control and suppressing emotions, not feeling vulnerable or emotionally attached.

Because maybe, just maybe, he didn’t want to be the guy you rolled your eyes at anymore. Maybe he was done playing the part of the asshole who didn’t give a fuck. 

Shoving his hands in his pockets, Rafe walked faster, trying to shake off the feeling. But he knew. It was the way you laughed when you were around him, even when you were annoyed. The way you always gave as good as you got. The way you’d looked at him today—like maybe, just maybe, you weren’t as immune to him as you tried to be.

You were off having lunch with Nate.

The safe choice. And if there was one thing Rafe Cameron wasn’t? It was safe. And maybe, deep down, he hoped that was the reason you wouldn’t be able to walk away from him for good.

He kept walking, his footsteps loud in his head, like each step was trying to drown out the voice that was screaming at him to turn around. To go back and say something. Anything. But he didn’t. He wasn’t that guy. Not the one to chase after someone, to make a big scene. No, he was the one who sat back, arms crossed, and watched the whole thing play out like it didn’t bother him. Like it wasn’t tearing him up inside.

Rafe realized he was pissed. Not at Nate. The guy was just playing his part. But at you. No, not really at you either. He was pissed at himself. For letting things get this complicated. For letting you get under his skin the way you had.

It wasn’t like you were his. It wasn’t like he had any right to be jealous.

But damn, the way Nate had just swooped in like it was nothing, like it was so obvious you’d say yes to him. The dude barely had to try, and there you were, actually considering it. Maybe you even wanted him to. He stopped walking, running a hand through his hair, trying to clear his head. 

Screw this. He needed to get out of here, away from the whole situation. Maybe blow off some steam, hit the gym, or go for a drive. But the thought of you sitting there with Nate, laughing, maybe even flirting—it was enough to make his jaw clench.

What if you were actually into that guy? What if all this back-and-forth with him was just... nothing to you? Some game you were playing because you liked the attention, but when it came down to it, you’d always pick someone like Nate?

If you picked Nate, fine. But if there was even a part of you that was feeling the same thing he was—if there was even a chance you weren’t as over him as you pretended to be? He wasn’t going to let you walk away that easily.

Not without a fight.

Rafe dug his phone out of his pocket, stared at the screen for a second. He could text you. Could hit you with some sarcastic line, ask how lunch with Captain America was going, but it felt... small. Petty. And, honestly, he didn’t want to come off as that guy—the jealous, insecure type. But not doing anything felt worse, like he was just letting things slip through his fingers.

He leaned against a nearby fence, staring off into the distance. Part of him was waiting for some kind of sign. Like maybe you’d ditch Nate and text him instead. Maybe you’d realize that this whole thing with Nate was boring, that you needed something more. 

Or maybe you wouldn’t. Maybe you’d laugh and smile at Nate’s predictable jokes, and that’d be it. You’d pick the guy, the one your friends would probably approve of. The one who didn’t make you feel like you were on a rollercoaster every time you were around him.

Rafe kicked the fence post. He hated this. Hated feeling out of control, like someone else was calling the shots. Like you were making choices that didn’t involve him.

And yet, there he was. Waiting.

He was about two seconds away from hurling his phone into the bushes when it buzzed in his hand. His heart actually stopped for a second. No way. There was no way.

He glanced at the screen, and there it was—your name, lighting up his phone.

Every instinct told him to play it cool. Let it ring a few times, don’t seem desperate. But his hand moved on its own, thumb swiping across the screen before he could stop it. He brought the phone up to his ear, heart hammering in his chest, trying to sound normal.

“Yeah?” he said, trying to keep his voice steady, like he wasn’t dying inside.

And just like that, everything else—Nate, the frustration, the whole stupid back-and-forth—faded into the background. Because right now, you were calling him.

Lunch with Nate was proving to be exactly what you expected: normal. easy. boring.

He talked about his classes, his weekend plans, asked you a couple of questions about your own. And you answered, smiling, nodding, doing all the things you were supposed to do. But your mind? It was somewhere else entirely.

It was with Rafe. With the way he looked at you before he left, like he was daring you to stop him. Like maybe he wanted you to say something, anything, to keep him from walking out. And as much as you tried to ignore it, that little flutter in your chest hadn’t gone away.

“So, how’s studying going?” Nate asked, pulling you back to the conversation.

“Huh? Oh, yeah, it’s fine. Just... a lot,” you mumbled, forcing a smile.

Nate raised an eyebrow, clearly picking up on the fact that you weren’t all there. “You sure? You seem a little distracted.”

You hesitated, your mind flashing back to Rafe. To the way he’d been so close to you during your study session, leaning in like he had every intention of pushing your buttons. But it wasn’t just that. It was the way he’d talked about the bonfire, about seeing you as more than just someone to mess with. And for the first time, it felt like maybe Rafe wasn’t just a flirt. Maybe he was actually trying to tell you something.

“I’m fine,” you lied, stabbing at your sandwich with way too much enthusiasm.

But you weren’t fine. Not even close.

You knew why. Sitting here with Nate, everything felt... off. It was like you were trying to make this picture-perfect version of your life fit, but the edges weren’t lining up. You were supposed to want this—supposed to be happy that the guy you’d been into for months was finally showing interest. But instead, all you could think about was Rafe. About the way your heart had sped up when he looked at you, the way his voice dropped when he was being serious, when he wasn’t hiding behind that smirk.

God, why couldn’t you stop thinking about him?

Nate cleared his throat, snapping you out of it again. “You sure you’re good? You’ve been pretty quiet.”

You bit your lip, nodding, but it was like the words were stuck in your throat. “Yeah. Just... got a lot on my mind, I guess.”

Like how you might’ve just let Rafe walk away.

Nate didn’t push it, and part of you was relieved. The other part? It was screaming at you to stop pretending. To be honest, at least with yourself. Because the truth was, as much as you wanted to want Nate, you couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe, just maybe, Rafe was the one you should’ve been sitting with right now.

And that scared you. Because choosing Rafe meant choosing chaos. It meant diving headfirst into something that had no guarantees, something that could blow up in your face. But it also meant feeling alive. Because with him, everything was more intense. More real.

As you and Nate left the sandwich shop, walking back to campus, you couldn’t help but glance around, half-expecting to see Rafe somewhere. But he wasn’t there. He was gone, and now you were stuck wondering if maybe you’d just made a huge mistake.

Nate smiled, oblivious to the storm inside your head. “So, you wanna do this again sometime?”

Your heart sank a little at the question. Because the answer should’ve been a yes, no hesitation. But instead, all you could think about was Rafe. About how you wished you were with him, laughing, arguing, feeling that electric tension that seemed to hang in the air whenever he was around.

You swallowed, forcing a smile. “Yeah, sure.”

But as the words left your mouth, you knew you were lying.

And Nate, being Nate, didn’t seem to notice. He was still smiling, probably thinking the lunch went fine, like everything was falling into place just the way he thought it should. But you? Your mind was miles away, stuck on other guy and the way he’d left without looking back.

You felt like you should say something to him, like you should be more present in the moment, but every time you opened your mouth, nothing came out. 

Did you really want Nate? Or had you just been chasing the idea of him this whole time because it was easy, because it was safe? Because he was the kind of guy you grew up thinking you should be with?

But then there was Rafe. And the more you tried to push him out of your head, the more he stayed there, taking up space, making everything with Nate feel... dull in comparison.

“So, I was thinking,” Nate said, breaking the silence, “Maybe we could check out that movie this weekend? You know, the one you mentioned a while back?”

His voice pulled you out of your thoughts, and you blinked, trying to focus. “Oh. Yeah, maybe.”

But the truth was, you didn’t care about the movie. You didn’t care about any of it right now.

“Hey, you okay?” Nate’s voice snapped you back again, his eyes narrowing in concern.

You plastered on a smile, nodding quickly. “Yeah, sorry. Just... distracted, I guess.”

 “Well, if you’re busy this weekend, we can always reschedule.”

“I’ll let you know,” you replied, hoping he wouldn’t push it any further.

Nate nodded, but you could tell he wasn’t convinced. And honestly?

Neither were you.

By the time you made it back to your dorm, you were mentally exhausted. Nate had left with a casual wave and a promise to text you later, but as soon as he was out of sight, you let out a long breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding.

You sat on the edge of your bed, staring at your phone like a fucking idiot. But no messages came in, no missed calls from Rafe or anyone else. It was just you, sitting there, replaying the whole afternoon in your head.

Why did everything feel so wrong with Nate? He was supposed to be the plan. He was supposed to be your choice. The easy, right choice.

Suddenly, your phone buzzed in your hand, pulling you out of your thoughts. Your heart jumped in your chest as you glanced down, half-expecting it to be Rafe. But it wasn’t. It was Nate, sending a follow-up text about the weekend plans.

You stared at the message for a long moment, your thumb hovering over the keyboard.

What were you doing? Why were you still holding onto this idea of Nate when your heart was clearly somewhere else? Somewhere messy, complicated, and... dangerous.

Before you could stop yourself, you closed out of Nate’s message and opened Rafe’s contact. Your thumb hovered over his name for a second before you hit "Call."

The phone rang once. Twice. Your heart pounded in your chest as the seconds dragged on. Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe you should just hang up before he—

“Yeah?” Rafe’s voice came through the line, a little gruff but unmistakable.

You froze for a second, suddenly unsure of what to say. But then you took a deep breath. “Hey, uh... you busy?”

There was a pause, and you could almost hear the smirk in his voice. “What, finally realizing Nate’s not as fun as you thought?”

 “Something like that.”

There was a beat of silence, and you thought maybe he was going to tease you some more. But then his voice softened, just like it had earlier. “You wanna meet up?”

Your heart skipped a beat. “Yeah. I think I do.”

Another pause, and then: “Same spot?”

You knew exactly what he meant. The library, third floor, in the corner where you’d been studying. You nodded, even though he couldn’t see it. “Yeah. I’ll be there.”

“See you in a few.”

And just like that, the line went dead. What had you just done? 

You hung up, heart racing like you’d just agreed to do something you weren’t supposed to. But wasn’t that the whole point? This thing with Rafe—it was unpredictable, messy, and completely off-script. 

As you grabbed your jacket and headed out the door, you couldn't help but feel like you were crossing some kind of line. With Nate, things were clear-cut, easy. But with Rafe? It was like stepping into the unknown. You knew there was a chance this whole thing could blow up in your face, but for once, you didn’t care.

You wanted real. You wanted fire. And right now, that was Rafe.

As you walked to the library, the campus around you blurred, your thoughts spinning back to every moment you’d had with him. Every teasing comment, every cocky grin, every time he’d gotten under your skin without even trying. Maybe you had been pretending with Nate—pretending to want something you were never actually sure about.

But with Rafe? You weren’t pretending. Even when it terrified you.

When you reached the third floor of the library, it was quiet, almost too quiet. Your footsteps echoed as you made your way to the spot you both knew so well. And there he was, leaning back in his chair like he didn’t have a care in the world, like he wasn’t the reason you’d been tied up in knots all day.

You rolled your eyes and crossed the room, dropping into the chair across from him. “Don’t start,” you warned, though the edge in your voice was weaker than you wanted it to be.

Rafe’s grin widened. “What, can’t handle me being right for once?”

You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest. “Right about what? You being a total pain in my ass? Sure, I’ll give you that.”

He leaned forward, resting his chin on his hand like he was amused by your whole existence. “C’mon, you know why you’re here.”

“So,” you started, trying to act casual, like your heart wasn’t pounding out of your chest. “I guess lunch with Nate didn’t really do it for me.���

He raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth twitching up in amusement. “No shit. Figured as much.”

You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t help the smile that crept up. “Why are you so smug about it?”

“Because,” he said, leaning forward, resting his elbows on the table, “I knew you’d come back.”

Your breath caught in your throat at how sure he sounded.

Of course he knew. That cocky, self-assured grin of his said it all. He’d been waiting for this moment—waiting for you to realize what he had probably known all along.

And damn if it didn’t piss you off.

You sat down across from him, trying to hold onto the last shreds of your resolve, but it was slipping. Fast. Because the way he was looking at you? Like he was daring you to admit what you were really feeling—it was messing with your head.

“So, what now?” you asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

Rafe crossed his arms, biceps bulging in his stupid polo, like he was giving you all the space in the world to figure it out. “That’s up to you.”

That’s the thing about him—he could act all indifferent, like he wasn’t bothered, but you could see it. There was something behind his eyes, just barely kept in check. And it wasn’t nothing. It wasn’t just some game to him. Not anymore.

But you weren’t ready to give him that satisfaction. Not yet. 

“What makes you so sure I’m not just here to tell you I’m picking Nate?”

That smirk faltered for just a second. “You’re not.”

You couldn’t be. 

“How do you know?”

“Because if you were, you wouldn’t have called me.”

The way he said it—so simple, so damn certain—made your heart skip. He was right, and you hated that he knew it. Hated that he had this pull on you that no one else ever had. But at the same time, you couldn’t deny the truth. Not when it was staring you in the face, wearing a smug expression and leaning back like he had all the time in the world.

“What if I did?” you shot back, still trying to hold your ground.

He shrugged, that infuriating grin never leaving his face. “Then I guess I’d have to live with that. But I’m not worried.”

Lies.

You narrowed your eyes at him, “You’re so damn cocky, you know that?”

“I’ve been told,” he said with a wink.

You wanted to roll your eyes again, to act like he wasn’t getting to you. But he was. And he knew it.

You rested your elbows on the table, your eyes meeting his. “And what if I told you I wasn’t sure? What if I told you I’m still figuring it out?”

He didn’t flinch. Didn’t move. Just kept his eyes locked on yours, like he was seeing right through the bullshit. “Then I’d tell you to take your time. Figure it out.”

The way he said it—so calm, so sure—made your stomach twist. He wasn’t asking you to pick him. He was daring you to. Because Rafe didn’t do half-measures. He didn’t do safe. He was all or nothing, and right now? He was putting it all on the table.

All you could think about was the way your heart was hammering in your chest, the way every part of you was screaming that this—this—was what you really wanted.

And that’s when it hit you: you weren’t scared of Rafe. You were scared of how much you wanted him.

“Rafe, I—” You stopped yourself, unsure of where you were even going with that.

His expression softened, just a fraction. “What? What do you want to say?”

You wanted to say everything. That you weren’t just messing with him anymore either, that you couldn’t stop thinking about him, that you were tired of pretending like Nate was some perfect choice when he wasn’t even in the same league. But saying all that? To someone who hurt you so much before?

He had that look, like he knew exactly what was going through your mind but was giving you space to figure it out on your own. But you weren’t sure. You weren’t sure if you were ready to say it out loud. Admitting how much Rafe meant to you felt like letting him win, like handing him all the power. And after everything, after all the back-and-forth, you didn’t want to be that vulnerable. Not with him.

“I know I’ve been an asshole,” he started, almost hesitant. “All those years, the shit I said—it wasn’t right. You didn’t deserve that. You don’t deserve that.”

Your breath caught in your throat. 

He ran a hand through his hair, like he was trying to figure out how to keep going. “I just... I don’t know. It was easier to push you away, to act like I didn’t give a fuck, you know? Like messing with you made it better somehow. But it didn’t.” He paused, his voice softening. “It made me feel like shit.”

You didn’t say anything. You couldn’t. You just sat there, staring at him, trying to process the fact that Rafe Cameron—Rafe—was apologizing.

He swallowed, looking down for a second before meeting your eyes again.

 “I know I’m a mess. Hell, I’ve always been a mess. And I get why you’d pick someone like Nate. The guy who won’t make you lose sleep wondering what the hell is going on.” He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “But the truth is, I fucked up. I’ve been fucking up since the beginning. With you, with us. And I hate that I did that." He pushed back slightly, running a hand over his face like he was frustrated with himself. “I’m not good with this... with feelings. With being upfront. But I’m trying, okay? I’m trying to figure it out. I don’t expect you to forgive me just like that or trust me after everything I’ve pulled. But I want you to know I’m not the same guy I was back then. It sounds fucking insane, but I’m not. I want to be better. For you. Because, fuck, I don’t want to lose you to some guy just because I couldn’t admit I was scared of this—of us.”

You bit your lip, not trusting yourself to speak just yet.

“And look, I know I’ve made it hard for you to believe me,” he said, his voice softer now, more honest than you’d ever heard him. “But you should know that you’re not just some game to me. Not anymore. You’re... everything I’ve been too afraid to want.”

The guy who spent years acting like nothing could touch him, like he was untouchable, was now sitting across from you, pouring his heart out. And you had no idea what to say.

Your mind was racing. It felt like everything you thought you knew about him, about what you were feeling, was suddenly flipped upside down. You'd always assumed Rafe would never be the guy who’d sit down and admit he was scared of something, especially not scared of you.

But here he was, looking like he was waiting for you to say something—anything.

What? What were you even supposed to say? That you forgave him? That you didn’t? That you were still figuring out how you felt about everything? You weren’t even sure yourself. But you did know one thing—whatever this was—it was real. 

You couldn’t deny that anymore.

“You don’t have to say anything. I just needed you to know that I’m not going to play around anymore. Not with you.”

Your heart clenched at that. And the thing was, you could see it in his eyes—he meant it. There was no teasing smirk, no cocky attitude. Just him. Raw and real and honest in a way that caught you completely off guard.

And suddenly, you realized that was what scared you the most. Not Rafe, but the way he made you feel. The way he pushed you to stop pretending, to be real, even when it terrified you.

You stared at him, feeling like your brain was short-circuiting. He was spilling his guts to you. It felt... unreal, and you were torn between wanting to laugh and maybe freak out a little.

All you could think was, How the hell am I supposed to handle this? This wasn’t what you were expecting. Not from him.

“So, what,” you started, leaning back a bit, trying to keep your voice casual, “you’re just, like, a totally different person now? Is this the part where you tell me you’ve been secretly going to therapy or something?”

Rafe’s lips twitched, but he didn’t fully smile. “No, not exactly,” he said, running a hand through his hair. “But... I’ve been trying to figure shit out. With myself. With us.”

With us. Your stomach did this stupid little flip at that, but you ignored it. “That’s a big statement, Cameron. You’ve had, like, two whole epiphanies and suddenly you’ve got everything figured out?”

He sighed, “I’m not saying I’ve got it all figured out, alright? I’m just trying to be honest for once. I’m done screwing around with you.”

His tone was sincere, and as much as you wanted to keep teasing him, the look in his eyes made your throat tighten a bit. You shifted in your seat, your mind running a million miles an hour.

“I mean, I guess that’s an improvement,” you muttered, keeping it light even though your heart was pounding.

Rafe raised an eyebrow. “You guess?”

“Well, yeah,” you said, crossing your arms and giving him a pointed look. “You were, let’s see, kind of a dick for a long time.”

He didn’t argue. “Yeah. I was.”

That caught you off guard. No defense, no excuses. Just... agreement. 

“Okay, so... what now?” you asked, trying to play it cool. “You apologize, and I just forget all the crap from before? You’re really not making this easy,” you said, trying to keep your tone light, but your voice betrayed you, sounding a little too soft.

Rafe shrugged, that little smirk threatening to return. “Didn’t think you wanted easy.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, trying to keep your composure. “You think you know me so well, huh?”

“Better than you think.”

Your heart raced. “Right, because I just love being confused and frustrated. It’s my favorite hobby.”

He chuckled, clearly enjoying this back-and-forth. “Well, you could always just admit that you’re intrigued. That might save us both some time.”

“Intrigued? Please. More like I’m questioning my life choices.”

Rafe leaned forward, “Hey, at least it’s not boring, right? I mean, look at us. This is way more interesting than whatever you were doing with Nate.”

You couldn’t argue with that. “True. But interesting doesn’t mean it’s not a total trainwreck waiting to happen.”

“Maybe,” he said, “But it could also mean something different.”

 “You’re really pulling out all the stops, huh?” you said, trying to lighten the mood again. “What’s next? A serenade?”

“Actually, I’m not a bad singer,” he quipped, flashing that trademark grin. “But I think I’ll spare you the performance for now.”

“Wow, I’m overwhelmed by the humility.”

He chuckled softly, “You love it. And you know it.”

There it was again—the way he said things like it was a fact, like he could read you better than you could read yourself. And the worst part? He wasn’t exactly wrong.

“You don’t know everything about me, Rafe,” you said, your voice quieter now, but not weak. 

His smile softened, just barely, like he heard what you weren’t saying out loud. 

“Maybe not everything. But enough to know you’re not here by accident.”

It was easier to blame the pull he had on you. But deep down, you knew it wasn’t just him. You were here because something between the two of you, no matter how messy, no matter how confusing, felt unfinished.

You crossed your arms, trying to gain some control of the situation. “You’re awfully confident for someone who doesn’t have all the answers.”

“Not all of them,” he agreed, leaning back in his chair again, “But I know enough to know I’m not letting you go without a fight.”

There it was. That line you didn’t know you were waiting for. The line that said this wasn’t just some flirty game for him anymore. That maybe he was as scared of losing you as you were of admitting how much you wanted him.

And in that moment, sitting across from him, with all his defenses down and no jokes left to deflect with, you realized something terrifying: you weren’t ready to walk away either.

“Well,” you said, your voice softer, “I guess we’ll see if you’re really up for it, won’t we?”

His eyes locked onto yours, something serious flickering there for a moment before he nodded. “Yeah. We will.”

[fanfiction-obsession]

Major Monogram from Phineas and Ferb is a fascinating accidental example of unjust biases stemming from ignorance and laziness instead of intentional harm in the ‘species-ism’ that is a root of injustice in the PnF universe. In this essay I will

[startedwellthatsentence]

Murderbot 1.06 spoilers

I love that when Leebeebee asks how the Preservation Alliance deals with allocating resources for childcare, Baradwaj begins to go on about community support and shared responsibility, and Gurathin just bluntly states “debt”.

Neither is wrong, but the perspective is important. The Preservation Alliance does not have the material resources to support its population. It has to import them. And once they’re in the Preservation system, then yes, Baradwaj is right, the resources are allocated equitably to those who need them.

But Gurathin is also right, in that in order to acquire the resources in the first place, the alliance has to go into debt. And it has to do missions like the current PresAux mission in order to pay toward those debts.

The community resources are GOOD, but they aren’t FREE. Gurathin, who comes from outside of the system, is better able to see that reality. It’s not as if Baradwaj doesn’t know this, but it isn’t how she conceptualizes it, and she has to be reminded that the goods that are communally shared do have to originate OUTSIDE of their system.

[marvey-sideblog]

"And it just happened to be empty?" "Something like that."

Suits 4x8 "Exposure" Mike returns to Pearson Specter and gets Harvey's old office.

[rafecameronenjoyer]

frat boy rafe during his brief stint at the university of north carolina

📷 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕

[snoozykazoo]

merry ides of march devpost!

Ahhh, it’s that time of year again; another lap around the sun and another day closer to the Ides of March, the day that Julius Caesar got skewered through by his beloved friends! Sweet, sweet memories… But no matter! It’s Snoozy Devpost time!

If this is your first time seeing us, hey! We’re Snoozy Kazoo, a game dev studio of six guys who make dumb, silly, and fun games. We made the Turnip Boy games, and we’re currently in the midst of our latest release: Hobnobbers!

This month, we'll be getting into how we concept our characters!

What's Snoozy been up to?

A lot we can’t talk about, actually, but a lot of behind the scenes work as we’ve been nailing down various elements on Hobnobbers! Part of this work has manifested itself in, of course, Hobnobbers art style!

As with any game- or visual project, really- it’s important to spend time on concepting ideas and styles, so that the project has a strong foundation. Hobnobbers is no exception, and our lovely Creative Director, Jen, has come up with a workflow to ensure this works out!

We’ll be introducing a new character to convey this idea: the Gacha Goose! The host of one of our in-game shops, the Goose is an intimidating bird that controls a puppet girl.

(Note: Despite the name ‘Gacha Goose’, there will be no microtransactions in Hobnobbers! Fret not!)

The Process

Concepting is broken down into 6 phases:

Outlining the goal

Research

Sketch

Feedback

Refinement

Finishing

Outlining the goal is a process of figuring out what we want the design to be. In terms of utility: is this character an early-stage boss that is meant to introduce the character to the whimsy of a game’s world? Are they a shop-keeper? An intimidating mob enemy that can kill you in one hit? In addition, what sort of feelings do we want this character to invoke? For the Gacha Goose, we wanted the player to despise the Goose and feel pity for the girl. What specific vibes would help convey these emotions?

Taking the time to write down your goals before starting to draw can set a strong foundation that snowballs into the rest of these stages! Conveying as much information as possible with visuals alone is particularly important for games, where players don’t have the time to read a novel before playing.

Research

...is self-explanatory, yet sometimes the longest stage in the process: we collect reference materials that achieve the goals we mentioned in our first section, and see what we can learn from them!

For the Gacha Goose, medieval and doll-like pieces of clothing served as big inspiration. We ended up looking at a lot of clown-adjacent pieces, porcelain-esque prosthetics, and watercolor illustrations to get closer to our final idea.

Sketch

...is when all the ideas that have been worked on reach fruition for the first time. It can be messy, but just slamming together a variety of different vibes and looks to see what invokes the right feeling. Many different concepts should be made here, in order to keep in mind the next round…

Feedback!

It’s time to show the concepts to an audience. We do several different types of feedback: an internal one with just the team, a semi-internal one with friends and family of the team, and one with Camp Kazoo over in our Discord.

Not only do we ask for what people like best, but also what they feel about the design. Sometimes context is given for the character’s role in the world, sometimes it isn’t; finding out what that ‘first gut feeling’ is important.

Refinement

...is the actual application of the feedback that’s been received. It is a process of reflection, reassessing our goals, and figuring out how to marry what people think with what the purpose of our design is.

It should be noted that one stage of refinement isn’t the end of the process- going back to Feedback after finishing up another iteration and getting even more notes on what people think is just as important! Just be mindful of reaching a done state at some point. You’ve got a whole game to make, after all, and iterating constantly on the same idea will make for a game that never gets shipped.

And we're done!

The final result of our beloved Gacha Goose’s design is…

…

…oops! We’re keeping that secret for now! ;p We’ll be showing her final design in future updates, so keep your eyes peeled for those!

That’s our concepting process, out in the open! We hope it was insightful, and perhaps even helpful to other game developers out there! Now, onto other news…

Some new looks...?

We’re not just updating our game’s aesthetics; we’re updating our own! If you had peeped our website within the past few months, you’d have seen that everyone on the team had somewhat different icons; but no longer! We are all now united under the banner of having an Anime Profile Picture… okay yes perhaps incredibly minor compared to the epic task of making a game But. Look At How Cutie We Look Anyways.

Team Corner!

It’s back! Our favorite little place to meet different team members and bombard them with questions to foster a parasocial relationship with them! What fun and whimsy!

This week we’ve got… badadadum, Jen! Our Art Director!

What are you most excited for in Hobnobbers?

I’ve been really enjoying our concepting phase! It’s always fun to create new characters/environments and figure out what makes them tick. We’ve also been playing around with some UI design, which is personally one of my favorite things to work on. I’m excited to continue to see these things make it into the game! There’s always a point in development when all the pieces kind of click together, and you can see the fruits of everyone’s disciplines start to create something truly unique!

What’s something you’ve worked on in Hobnobbers recently that you’ve found particularly frustrating?

I feel most in my element when I’m working on 2D assets. Whenever I touch anything 3D, there’s some growing pains that come along with it. All in all, I get really passionate about learning new things, so it’s been pretty fun. When I start concepting characters or mocking up UI screens I feel like I can take a breath of relief though. I’m hoping some day 3D feels as natural as 2D to me!

What’s a source of personal inspiration for you as you design characters for Hobnobbers?

When it comes to the world of Hobnobbers, I’ve been really inspired by Studio Ghibli films! I love the soft world building in films like Spirited Away or Princess Mononoke, and how they handle spirits and folklore within these films. I’m hopping that we can create some interesting characters that players can really speculate about, but not necessarily get all the answers easily. I kind of want the players to create the answers themselves.

When it comes to the stores and what we call “whimsical consumerism”, I’ve been inspired by games like “Bombrush Cyberfunk” and, funnily enough, a game called “Breaking da Rules”, an old Fairly Odd Parents game made by THQ. Bombrush I just love those Y2K vibes, and it was a big inspiration for creating the runner. Breaking da Rules has a great way of creating these very whimsical and silly spaces. They also have this great ability to mesh 2D and 3D elements, which gives us some inspiration as well!

Lastly, I’ve been really inspired by old fantasy books. I love absorbing and learning from materials that inspire me, and recently I’ve received this book called “Arthur Spiderwick’s Field Guide to the Fantastical World Around You!” (A long title I know.) I can always go on Pinterest, but having physical resources from fantasy artists that I feel like to me are “the greats” gives me a lot of inspiration.

Yay! Thank you for your time!

Andddd we're all wrapped up!

As a reminder, feel free to send in questions for us to answer here on our Tumblr, or join our Discord and ask questions in the “ask-the-devs-❓” channel!

See you next month!!

— Kiki

[umathurwin]

pearl clutching over rafe cameron is sooo funny. yknow he’s not real right? yknow he didn’t actually kill anyone? yknow this is fiction and we can engage in the series without a moral panic? 😭

[lostsyren]

Do rafe and sofia want children? I imagine sofia would want them because of her big family. but is Rafe the type to want to be a father?

I don't know, I think rafe doesn't think he would be a good father, but I'm not sure if that would stop him

That’s so interesting because I imagine the opposite😭my first instinct is that Rafe would be the one to want to start a family. He’s trying to emulate Ward. He wants this picture perfect future and family together.

I think Sofia would probably be more wary. The fact she’s from a big family and has probably been parentified in some way, makes me doubt she’d want to be thrust into motherhood. I think she likes being the only person Rafe loves.

If they do end up pregnant, I don’t think it’d be a conscious decision/choice. They’re both young still (ironic seeing as his little sister is literally pregnant in canon😭)– they both enjoy just each other.

Pregnancy would be scary for both of them. I think Sofia would be afraid of his reaction, especially since there’s a lot of points in the show where she’s unsure if he’s serious about them. And I think Rafe would be afraid of messing up, like he is with everything he does in his life.

But I still think they’d want it. It’ll just be a big shift where they’re not acting like lovesick teenagers playing house anymore. And you’re so right–

“I think rafe doesn't think he would be a good father, but I'm not sure if that would stop him”

Imo, he’d pretend everything is okay, deluding himself that this is what he wants/what he should want. He’ll just internalise all the complex feelings he has about his dead/absent parents and non-existent family unit and then kinda project that toxic positivity onto Sofia too. Those internalised feelings will probably only surface after the kid is born. During the pregnancy stage, I think he’d fare very well with the “doting partner” approach.

Once their child is born, it all becomes real. That’s when I think he’ll distance himself. He’d be afraid to hold his kid, he’d kinda become unresponsive, just carrying out the motions. That’s when I think the roles will switch and Sofia will be the one to support him (instead of him undertaking the caretaker role like he did during the pregnancy). She’ll coax him out of his dread. She knows about Ward, so presumably he’s told her more about his family. She’ll be sympathetic and empathetic to his pain, whilst also wanting him to snap out of it and be there for her and their child. I think she’s good at operating Rafe– she can get him to calm down in the moment. But long term? I wonder if parenthood will bolster their relationship or undermine it?

(@dulcecherub wrote a fic about Sofia finding out she’s pregnant while Rafe’s away in Morocco and @delayeddrabbles has a mafia au fic where Sofia finds out she’s pregnant with Rafe’s kid while they’re hooking up. They’re both soooo good and influenced my opinions on how they’d feel!! You should check them out!! )

[mysimsloveaffair]

Meet My Couple Valentine’s Challenge 💕

Click the title for templates and details! I was tagged by @aleksa-sims, @ladybugsimblr, and @purplesimmer455. Thanks so much!

I'm tagging @pinkchocolatesims | @igglemouse | @ellemant | @therichant | @treason-and-plot | @soulthesimmer | @adzrielfaie | @whyeverr | and @budgie2budgie

[storytellerslense]

JJ Maybank character analysis

The meaning of the gun

"I got this thing, you know, to protect us" (JJ Maybank, Season 1, Episode 3)

At the start of the Pilot we see JJ Maybank as a funny, imaginative, rebellious guy who, although doesn't really think through the consequences of his actions, seems quite harmless.

However, his personality becomes a bit darker and erratic after he steals a loaded gun. He gets literally obsessed with always carrying it around and, to the dismay of the Pogues, does not hesitate to show it off for intimidation.

The possession of the gun holds a deep symbolic meaning for JJ Maybank, which goes far beyond the simple necessity of self-defense. Psychologically it can be described as "compensation" and a "defense mechanism." These terms describe how individuals use symbolic objects or behaviors to cope with inner conflicts or to make up for a lack of control in their lives.

The gun as a symbol for power and control

For JJ, who grows up in an environment where he has little control over his own life and safety, the gun symbolizes the opportunity to regain control. The gun gives him the feeling that he can protect himself and his friends.

Also, JJ is the one who faces the most oppression from many sides—whether it's from his abusive father, societal stigmas, or conflicts with the Kooks. Owning a gun represents a form of power that he otherwise lacks. It serves as a means for him to defend himself against those who oppress him.

In a powerful scene in Season 1, JJ points the gun at his abusive father and later breaks down crying to his friends: "I can't take it anymore... I was gonna kill him!"

The gun as an expression of JJ's inner conflicts

JJ's decision to possess a gun is an expression of his inner anger and desperation. The weapon represents his deep-seated frustration and his drive to combat the feelings of helplessness that overwhelm him due to his familial and social circumstances. It also expresses JJ's self-destructive tendencies. His willingness to take extreme measures highlights the depth of his emotional pain and despair.

The gun as a proof of coming of age

For JJ, forced to grow up early due to parentification, the gun also symbolizes his claim to independence and maturity. It is a means through which he can prove himself as capable and adult, someone who can protect himself and others.

Because he is often not taking seriously, JJ believes that possessing a gun will earn him more respect. It is an attempt to strengthen his position in the social hierarchy and assert his autonomy.

"(...) Remind you that I am the only one who can properly defend us." (JJ Maybank, Season 1)

The key moment of JJ losing his weapon

In "Outer Banks" Season 2, Episode 4 JJ Maybank finally gives up his weapon. It happens when the Pogues are about to get cornered by the police. JJ brandishes his gun in order to assert control over the situation. Recognizing this, John B steps in by assertively taking the gun out of JJ's hand, letting it fall to the ground, gently reassuring him, that he is going to be ok.

This message was extremely important for JJ, lifting the heavy weight of responsibility finally off his shoulders. JJ, being usually prepared to constantly put his own life on the line for the well-being of his father or his friends in order to "earn" their love and respect, was now protected and guided himself by his best friend.

"It's gonna be alright." (John B., Season 2, Episode 4)

After a short moment of indecisiveness and shock, JJ gives in and completes the act by quickly kicking dirt over the gun, so it stays hidden before the police can find it.

This is one of the most powerful, though underrated scenes in Outer Banks, because it really marks a key moment of JJ's personal development. It signifies his willingness to confront his inner demons: giving up control- for once not relying on himself but really trusting someone else's judgement. He is also accepted and cared for without having to proof himself or fulfill someone else's needs beforehand.

[waterdroid]

Banks being directly inspired both in design and musical theme by the noire detective genre.... Jen being a straight-up Private Investigator and Detective......

[nocturnalazure]

[leviiackrman]

"I don't feel in control sometimes. After all... I have someone else's thoughts in my head."

more edits || character page || x.x

Tag list (ask to be added or removed): @carrionsflower @statichvm @risingsh0t @simonxriley @tommyarashikage @sevikagf @confidentandgood @unholymilf @florbelles @thedeadthree @shellibisshe @roofgeese @aezyrraeshh @faerune @tekehu @jackiesarch @minaharkers @sergeiravenov @carlosoliveiraa @rosenfey @nokstella @queennymeria @heroofpenamstan @tethrras @viktorgf @d-esmond @solasan @bigbywlf @delzinrowe @fenharel @imogenkol

[delayeddrabbles]

playing house - obx au - brother's bsf!barry & childhood friend!sofia

masterlist

plot/concept/intro

part 1: quarter life crisis

headcanons

rafe/sofia and barry/sofia

moodboard: rafia

moodboard: bafia

sofia

barry

rafe