#Entirely selfish and felt no love...AHHH!!!

[lesbianraskolnikov]

I dont understand peoples confusion around how the people around rodya loved him. He just had the four he was not wildly popular. For one. I think his family still loved him because something was obviously wrong. But also thats his family I don't think they're going to start hating him because he suddenly lashed out and wanted to be alone. I feel the general consensus is that something was obviously wrong and that everyone could be forgiven so to speak. But i just dont get why this is baffling.

[jjkamochoso]

Imagine… Soshiro Hoshina Finding You on the Brink of Death

Angst, Hurt/No Comfort

Soshiro Hoshina x gn!reader

Warnings: mentions of injuries, ivs, death

Part two with fluff can be found here!

It looked to be the end of the line for you. Your Defense Force suit had long overheated, leaving you exhausted and vulnerable in your solo fight against the kaiju. The oversized monster saw how weak you were, becoming even more excited at the prospect of devouring yet another human. You kept shooting its snarling face in your desperation, round after round bouncing off its armored body since you wielded no extra power. The kaiju’s tail whipped around in a flash, hitting your slow moving body in the abdomen and making your gun fly from your grip. You were now splayed on the ground, unable to run and barely able to breathe. You didn’t want to give up but things were utterly hopeless. Your communications had been down the entire time of your 1 on 1 skirmish and your team had no idea where you were, you having been separated from them for far too long at that point. The kaiju strolled over to you, an aura of bloodlust surrounding it as it snatched you up in its jaw. You had no fight left in you—you just hoped your head would go first before all your bones were snapped.

“No more dinner for you tonight, you ugly shit.”

Was that… Soshiro? He came for you? You heard the faint unsheathing of swords as your eyes closed, ready to pass out. In its anger at being disrupted, the kaiju dropped you from its mouth and you tumbled onto the asphalt. The last thing you saw was a blur of violet hair and a whole lot of kaiju blood.

It was almost totally quiet when you came to again, save for the wheezing of your labored breaths. The sun was hanging high in the hazy sky and the weather was perfect--not too hot, not chilly at all. You wondered what Soshiro was up to. Was he still fighting the kaiju? You smiled at the thought. He was always so brave, the first one to jump into action. The relief you felt when he showed up to save you was insurmountable, though you probably weren't going to survive with your extensive injuries if you didn't see a doctor soon. What you wouldn't give to see his face again for the last time. No matter, the memories that you had together were more than enough for you. Maybe it was better this way. You couldn't imagine him setting eyes on your condition right now, you didn't want to burden him with your death. You prayed to whatever spiritual guide to let you pass before someone found your body; there was no way you'd let him lecture you about being more careful as you died.

"Vice Captain! They're still alive!"

You sighed as much as your broken body would allow. With Kafka around, your peaceful death plans would have to wait.

"Y/n, stay with us. Don't fall asleep, okay?"

His kind voice, though loud, was a welcome sound. Even still, your eyes were struggling to stay open as your head lolled around, but now your body was being maneuvered by someone whose touch had become a familiar comfort--

"Soshiro," you muttered, opening your eyes to find bright purple irises boring into your own. "Did you kill it?"

"Kill it? He obliterated that thing!" exclaimed Kafka, excitedly gesticulating. "He was all, swoosh with the swords and the honju was like, ahhh! Don't dice me up! But Vice Captain was like too bad, you should've thought of that before putting your hands on my y/n-"

"That's enough, Hibino."

"Yes, sir. I'll just, uh... stand over there."

Kafka ran off without another word, leaving you in the arms of the man you loved most.

"You’re my knight in shining kaiju armor," you choked out, trying to get a laugh from Soshiro, but he wasn't having any of it as he patched up your external injuries the best he could with his field first aid kit.

"I almost lost you, y/n. You almost died because I was too slow."

"Soshiro, that's not..." The blood you coughed up mixed with the blood on Soshiro's uniform.

"I know this might be selfish of me, but I can't let you die because I can't live without you. I don't want to live a life that doesn't have you in it. I would do anything for you." He placed a large bandage on a cut on your face, letting his fingertips rest there for longer than necessary before getting back to the task at hand. "I remember you said all those years ago you would do anything for me, too. Would you please hang in there and survive this? For me? For… us?”

He was right, you did say that. It was about a year after you both joined the Defense Force. You were both underdogs and no one seemed to believe in you and your abilities, except for each other. You had bonded over being underestimated and swore to each other that you’d never leave one another behind, in anything. He very obviously made good on that promise today.

You coughed up more blood and you could see the worry and pain in Soshiro’s gaze as he looked upon you, lying in his arms like a broken doll. He so gently wiped away the tears that were falling down your cheeks.

“It-everything hurts,” you whimpered.

“I know, I know it does. But we’re gonna get you the help you need, okay?”

You didn’t respond, causing Soshiro’s heart to plummet.

“Y/n. No, no, no, you gotta wake up. C’mon, this isn’t funny,” he pleaded, tapping your face, but getting no response.

“Shit! Hibino!” he yelled, trying his best to stay composed. “We need medic right now! Y/n won’t wake up!”

“Coming right now, Vice Captain!”

Sure enough, a doctor came rushing over, immediately placing down a stretcher. Soshiro loaded your unmoving body onto the hard plastic and he couldn’t help but think of how fragile you looked. Normally you were such a bright light in his life and a formidable ally not easily defeated, but right now, you looked one step from death’s door. He and Kafka dropped you off in an ambulance, ivs immediately being pumped into your veins. As those doors closed, Soshiro getting one last look of the love of his life, he prayed to whoever would listen that the door hadn’t closed on the opportunity to tell you how he truly felt.

PART TWO

[swarnim29]

Iron man 1 (2008) Review:

Ofcourse the start of this saga, i just rewatched it and it still gives me the same thrills it did the first time. This movie is and always will be the greatest thing in the mcu. Despite many equally good movies after this, nobody has topped this one ever and I don't anything ever will.

Also "proof that tony stark has a heart" hits so fucking hard when you know how it's used in endgame and I'm like that's 11 years old. Pepper deserves more recognition for this.

You know one thing about this movie that I've not seen in any other mcu film is that with iron man, i feel the connection. We watched him as a selfish playboy, we watch him get captive, and we watch him change. It's like we built iron man with him. Cause when Obadiah ripped out his arc i felt the pain in my chest. I've never felt more connected to any other superhero as much as i feel connected with him. Iron man 1 is all about proving how people can change and this movie is like taking you and every1 else on that journey together with tony stark.

Also people don't talk about the kidnapping enough. Like you see a man who's a spoiled brat and very selfish but when he's asked to build the weapon he refuses. They torture him relentlessly. They throw him in the water and omg it could have literally electrocuted him cuz of this arc. but this flawed genius of a man, decided to fucking build a suit to escape. How many people in the mcu could have done that???? NONE. ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. Even if someone was more smart than tony, they couldn't have. THIS IS WHAT MAKES HIM IRON MAN, NOT THE ARMOUR.

And the pepperony moments in this movie are so goated like ahhh the sexual tension is so thin. And they're literally idiots in love that it takes them the end of 2nd movie to get together like man

Also a gentle reminder that marvel didn't need to include the entire suit up of the armour but they know what sells in the industry and this is RDJ

Also one thing I love about the iron man movies is that the love interest is not just a damsel in distress. She's in turn saving the hero's ass many times, literally and figuratively.

Also a AU idea: when obie rips out the arc reactor i think pepper should be the one to put it back in, that would've been so good.

Also rhodey is so underrated man. I love rhodey.

I obviously don't have anything negative to say about the movie or the characters but guys in the avengers and civil war i have a lot to say. Wait for that please. But also lmk if i should continue it or not.

Thank you

Follow along more reviews ;)

[keepmeinmind-01]

Hello! You should know that I’m literally months behind on reading your fics, because every time I start a chapter or one-shot of yours, I immediately get bowled over by either emotions or the quality of writing and become frozen. Like, I read 1k into “world insured” tonight and started crying and was like “nope, I cannot. Maybe I’ll be more emotionally stable tomorrow”. 😆 And I read another chapter of NLAA about 2 months ago and concluded “this was so excellent I don’t even know what to write in a comment, so I guess I can never read or comment on anything they were ever again obviously”.

This is clearly entirely irrational, but — then again — I don’t pretend to be entirely rational.

Anyway, I just felt compelled to share with you how appreciated your work is! And how intensely beautiful & artful i experience it as! Writers aren’t told that enough, I think; and since I “owe” you approximately 7 comments and can’t bring myself to emotionally face the rest of WI today, here you are.

Thank you for your insight and your gifts to fandom!

-uefb

@unnamedelement ahhh thank you so much for this message, it’s incredibly kind and I’m so touched/honoured that you’ve enjoyed my writing and found it has such a strong effect (for better or for worse, LOL!). it means a lot to hear this as a writer, especially because I’ve also loved following your FB fics too ���

I completely understand getting overwhelmed when reading! I also have this, like if I read something that particularly gets me in the feels or I don’t like, I go all funny for days hahaah ruminating on it or feeling sick. and if I’m being honest, while I didn’t do this so much at the start of NLAA, now that I’m further along, sometimes I get a little emotional too because I just want newt and theseus to have a better life hahaah. I am a bit selfish on this front because I as the writer get to imagine all these fixits and hurt/comfort drabbles in my head after it’s done to soften the blow of the quite heavy material, but I never get around to writing them up or sharing xd

so I completely understand and please don’t worry about needing to read or comment at a certain pace! take all the time you need :) your irrational appreciation is rationally appreciated haha

theseus and newt are on a big overall healing journey in ‘keep me in mind’ and it does end very happily ever after. I can’t make any promises with the dozens of other fic ideas I have (which I sort into ‘angst’ and ‘not angst’ , I do think about fluff too now and then 💀) but they will be okay, their bond and love for one another will get them through 😌 I also really like your interpretation of both of them and their relationship as siblings, it’s really nice to see where they’re both fleshed out and Theseus is trying his best 🥺

thank you for sharing this, it’s made my day, and I’m so grateful you took the time to let me know because ahh it means a lot!! <3

[selfelegy]

i think punishing myself is a way to avoid feeling the emotion or pain attached to behavior

remember in that 400 level course i genuinely forgot the title i hated that prof. he asked a question about why there’s so much red light in the sky at sunset and naturally i say cause it can travel the furthest and the answer was refraction caused by co2 molecules in the air (???) who cares right

and he goes nope try again

and i go idk

and he keeps badgering at me just like abel did that one time at ieec choir where i couldn’t get the note right and he kept making me sing it over and over again, and in both situations someone, with probably good intentions, would come after class and go “dude im so sorry u just experienced that” like ik they were trying to help but it would always make me feel the hottest shame. and i would tell myself i was better off dead. everytime that memory resurfaces i scream - more than scream, i jolt. i liken it to when a doctor uses a rubber hammer to tap the soft space in ur knee - i reflexively tell myself to kill muself. and i used to think that’s me punishing myself because that’s all ive ever know. the only way i know how to deal with bad behavior. oh, bad thoughts too? idk.

but i think today i realized i punish myself to avoid the hard feelings. rather than say i felt humiliated, i lash out at myself in what feels like righteous anger. i think its all vanity. i think about myself too much maybe? no, i think that is just the result of this habit. hyper vigilance because of the desperate desire to preserve ones self. i thought about me all the time because my entire world was always me. me listening to my thoughts and fears ambitions vilest thoughts, the softest touch has always been mine. and i think im just now aware that at some point my brain stopped distinguishing between selfishness and self healing. between the pride from being self sufficient and the fear of not being able to do it. alone. it’s a fear of failure at life. i’m afraid of doing life wrong…..

yo

why? why am i afraid of messing things up in life???? oh cuz then my parents won’t love me and my brothers will pity me or lecture me or ignore me. but that’s not, oh it feels true. and so where do i begin? do i convince myself it’s not true by being vulnerable and watching their love for me sustain? i’ve done this before. i think my older brother finally demonstrated a love like this when i called him about my smoking habits. and he was gentle in a way i would never expect. but he was, and i love him. i can’t do it with my parents, ahhh i just can’t. it would be the definition of insanity unfortunately.

so then what? do i just sit and sift thru these feelings knowing i have no one to accept responsibility for them, or anyone to refute them with meaning.

i mean, what else do i do but ignore it? but to trample those feelings down and punish whatever behavior i did to cause myself to feel…this way…but i did nothing wrong. the only thing i was guilty of was being a 16 year old girl so utterly desperate for love. for a love that meant something more than words. and yet im here still punishing myself for that crime. isn’t that sad? so much time i’ve spent blaming myself for the feelings i did not create. but the only crime my parents are guilty of is being victims of their parents. victims of their culture their people their customs. guilty of their place of birth. and what guilt is there. i tried to find love in my mom and realized she has been looking too. i tried to find peace in my dad and realized hes given up long ago. why r my brothers so whole? i envy them as

i was trying to make a simile with something in nature but envy…what does life know about envy? as far as these trees are concerned, they’re alive. when did that not become enough? envy is unnatural…a result of sin..why do i envy my brothers? i want to be loved like they are, i want to love like they do, i want to hold something and make it have meaning like they do. i feel like im a shell with a lot of plywood and space in between. a stud placed every 3 inches and they are concrete. poured at some place i was not allowed in. i feel like their upbringing and mine are so different. we are so different. and i feel like they are more equipped to weather these storms and i am struggling to stay afloat in calm waters. but im alive. why isn’t that enough? because life is tiresome and laborious. a waste of energy. i stay because God has commanded it. and. i guess. because i belive that the life i live can’t be the plan God had set out for me. i know this to be true.

okay so then what. do i just keep feeling the hard things? every emotion i experience comes at me ten fold from average. and its exhausting, constantly feeling everything all the time at max capacity. i am tired.

so i debate, feel the hard things, or tell myself i don’t have to feel them anymore if i am perfect. ok one seems way more doable than the other im ngl i thought it would swing the other way since ive been doing it my whole life but omg lets be fr being perfect is a myth. like genuinely. okay so lets feel the hard things. what does that look like. okay so today i identified that i felt humiliated at school and i genuinely felt better. so maybe we start there. we forgive ourselves for lashing out at our past self, and we remind our past self how much we love her then and now. and hold her while she retells what she felt like, now having the words and the ears to listen to them.

hey i was there, in that same body as you were, watching everything

you wouldn’t talk even when somebody was listening, cause you didn’t have the words

well i have more than enough

for the both of us

[m1ckeyb3rry]

LMFAO THE “what a weird ass dream” start has me REELING like oh honey you’re in for a rude awakening (literally)

Ok I paused to type that ^ and was gonna keep commenting in my notes as I went as if I were annotating but then I got too engrossed and forgot LMAOAO but anyways

STOPPPP KARASU??? SHDKSHSJS I will not swerve iwillnotswerve….but gardener Karasu AHHHDGHS it’s just giving more sweetheart humble Karasu I can’t

Ok pause SHSH the way you write Otoya is so?? >>>>>>> like ok I’m back on track now I want this Otoya LMAOAOA he’s like the perfect balance between go with the flow do what I want chill Otoya and deadly assassin ninja Otoya also that deal they made>>>>>> I’m seriously waiting for Y/n to succeed

Hiiragis also such an ass I love it because it also kinda reminds me of him in canon?? But I also never was really partial to him in the manga either so I love seeing him full villain here, also the constant distinction between Y/N being like her own (?) vs associated as. Hiiragi is something I really enjoy!! Idk I just kinda love the set up like we KNOW this mc is gonna be different and a lot more selfish and independent?? Like the constant distinction in identity is so satisfying to read for some reason like it’s refreshing to see y/n not try to reclaim the name

But yeah omg otoya <333 I mean I was already an otoya fan before hollyhock but this just opened my eyes to another Otoya Avenue and I LOVE IT can’t wait for the next installment…(also just out of curiosity how many installments do you think this’ll end up being? Very excited hehe)

Eita nation has been fed thank you for the feast

-Karasu anon

LMAOO i felt like it made sense that she wouldn’t believe what had happened considering she’s prone to nightmares and the entire situation is kinda crazy 😭 like yukimiya secretly betraying her family and otoya almost killing her…i wouldn’t want to believe it either 😔💔

HAHAHA omg well i’m glad you were engrossed in it at least 🤩🙏🏻

DO YOU SEE WHAT I’M SAYING ABT THEM LOWKEY HAVING A MEETCUTE like him waking her up while she’s sleeping on the bench swing in the garden surrounded by trees and flowers is so romance novel shoujo anime coded to me 😩 unfortunately y/n ruins it by being all “i can’t trust you 😐” and “you have a stupid name 😨” and “my half brother and father would kill you if they saw what you’re up to 🫣” LMAOOO poor karasu 😓 i’m excited to write more of their interactions though!!

AHHH YESSS i’ve been doing my best to incorporate his more chill go w the flow canon personality into his role as a ninja who kills whoever he’s told to!! it’s def a balance because if he’s too unserious then it’s almost disingenuous to the story itself but if he’s too proper and grave abt things he doesn’t feel like himself anymore?? idk but omg the deal…i’m so excited to write how it all plays out HAHAHA it’s going to be super fun i think!!

hiiragi is so horrible in this story but considering he was already kind of a douche in canon i don’t think it’s too terrible that i’m writing him like this!! i agree that he’s not one i cared much for in the manga either (he only even appears in epinagi for the most part and he’s antagonizing my man the whole time so we’re automatically enemies for that) so i don’t mind writing him in full villain mode here!! and yeah for y/n the name hiiragi has only ever been used to hurt her so even though she acknowledges that they’re her family and she’ll do her best to look out for them she’s also hyper aware that she’s different and her own person. her relationship to the hiiragi clan will evolve as the story goes on and her character develops and i think it’ll be interesting to watch how much things change from the beginning of the story to the end

HOLLYHOCK OTOYA MY BELOVED 💖💖💖 he and y/n are truly meant for each other…mr “your life is a game to me” and miss “i want you to belong to me” UM?? i almost considered going back and adding the toxic relationships tag but honestly the relationship itself isn’t even that toxic (if you can set aside all the murdering and death threats) it’s just between two very questionable individuals 😭 somehow it makes it much more fun to write than if they were perfect and normal though?? and honestly makes otoya more appealing to me LMAOAOA

hmm i’m not quite sure how many chapters it’s going to be but definitely a lot!! i’d be surprised if it was less than ten although ig it just depends on how long certain things take me to write 🤔 but i def anticipate it being on the longer side HAHA idk if it’ll quite get the opportunity to join the 100k+ club as many of my other fics have but for sure it’s going to be quite a lot…we’re still in the setup phase/prologue arc almost atm?? like these are relatively small-scale conflicts compared to what goes on later in the story so i don’t see it being less than 30-40k words (although again yk how accurate my predictions usually end up being — aka not very 😟)

[omnishambl3s]

Chapter 20

It had been a week and a half since the incident that had turned their life upside down. 

The swelling in their eye receded, and they’d returned to class. They didn’t think they would have been able to do so without Silas, or at least not as easily. He had really and truly been an amazing help. They couldn’t believe it. 

He had even managed to make them laugh, genuinely laugh, for the first time in who knows how long. 

“Besides, I’m the only one who’s allowed to cause you suffering.” 

Not only had it made them laugh, but it also… well. It had several effects on them, including turning them on and making them fall in love a little more. 

They had responded by telling him to ‘shut up,’ and rolling their eyes despite their painful awareness of the hue of their face. He had always been so very good at making them suffer. In the best of ways. 

In the back of their mind, a little more than subconsciously, they’d already made up their mind. They wanted to stay with him. It was entirely selfish and indulgent, though, and they were shamefully aware of it. 

They felt that surely, it was wrong that they actually wanted to live with him – not just sleeping on his sofa temporarily. They were sure that if they admitted this, or even told him that they wanted to choose his home as their own, something awful would happen. 

He would say, oh… well, I meant it temporarily. I was just trying to be nice. You can’t just live here. 

And then he’d push them away because they’d spent too much time together and he wouldn’t want anything to do with them. He’d be relieved when they finally left. He might even help them leave just to rid himself of them. 

There would be no more banter, no more playful fights, no more soft touches, no more smiles or scowls, no more… truces. 

They heaved a sigh, head hung in their hands. They were sat on their sofa again, overthinking everything. Again. They had destroyed their nails in the past week, a dead give away of their mental and emotional state. 

Their phone buzzed. 

Silas (knife emoji, blood emoji, skull emoji, fire emoji, heart emoji): When was the last time you left your house? 

They had left their house for class and work. He knew that, he was there. Why would he even ask? 

Klaus: you literally witnessed me leave my house today. 

Silas: No, I mean – other than school or whatever. Like… leisure? When was the last time you did something besides stress out on your sofa?

They grimaced at their phone. They were actively stressing out on their sofa that very moment. 

Klaus: it’s irrelevant. 

Silas: … you’re stressing on your sofa right now, aren’t you? 

Klaus: No. shut up. 

Silas: lmaoooo 

Silas: ok. Come over and let’s go out or something. Even if it’s just for a walk. 

Klaus. … fine. But I’m going to complain the entire time. 

Silas: I’d expect nothing less.  

After a glass of wine and slowly and begrudgingly being  persuaded from their sour mood, Silas convinced them to go on a walk and share a joint, which led them to a bar. 

“Why not? You deserve to unwind and blow off some steam,” he had said, shrugging with that stupid, cute smile of his. “Drinks are on me.” 

“… I guess,” they had huffed. 

They made it as far as 3 drinks – they settled on gin, and Silas was having whiskey, per usual. 

“You should just move in with me.” 

Klaus nearly choked on their drink. They stared at him. Surely, they’d misheard. 

“What?” 

“You should just… move in with me. I know you hate me and whatever,” he shot them some knowing look, “but watching you be so stressed out and depressed is… really hard. You don’t even deserve any of this in the first place. Plus, I like being close to you. Y’know, like being able to walk across the street and annoy you.”

“Ahhh, so that’s what this is, you just want to drive me crazy. Is that your master plan then? To just make me lose my mind once and for all?” He was getting pretty close as it was. Even so, they couldn’t help their grin. 

“Yes.” They both chuckled. 

“I should have known.” They shook their head. 

“But seriously. Like, I don’t mind helping you support yourself if it means you’re like – not suffering or starving or god forbid, homeless. But just thinking about you having to deal with moving your stuff, draining your already limited funds on move-in costs, either living alone in some hole in the ground or – or – god, the idea of someone else annoying you? Like if you didn’t get along with your roommates? Which, you won’t, I know you. People our age are messy and you’ll hate it and them. What if you started fighting? With someone else? That would be terrible! That’s my job.” He pressed his finger into the sticky booth’s table as if to make a point as he concluded his impassioned speech. 

Klaus blinked, face tickling burning and surely incredulous. 

“Silas, I had no idea you felt that strongly about me.” They teased, though they weren’t lying. They forced the best condescending smirk they could, trying to appear unfazed. 

“I – well – uh,” he stumbled ungracefully over his words, face going red and distracted. 

Huh. 

It was as if he’d been caught red handed. 

“I just… yknow… you’re my enemy. No one else is allowed to fuck with you.” He stated decisively, shrugging. 

They appraised him for a moment, best they could through their drunkenness. He seemed… nervous, uncomfortable. Interesting, they thought. 

“Well…” they started, tone both addressing his suspicious behavior, and opening up their dialogue. “I suppose it would be much more convenient. Besides the whole… you bit.” 

A teasing smirk tugged at their lips, the first genuine expression of its kind in two weeks. It seemed to elicit some reaction in him, and they watched as his throat bobbed. 

“And you’re right. I hate everyone. Including you. Especially you. But I can at least…” they cut themself off before they admitted they could tolerate him. “Ah,” they thought of a way to finish that sentence. They swallowed. “At least I’m accustomed to you.” They tried to force their face blank, refusing to meet his gaze. 

“It’s ok, you can admit that you kind of like me sometimes.” He grinned cheekily. They had missed that stupid shit-eating grin of his. 

“Absolutely not.” They silently kicked themself, as even saying that was an admission in itself. 

“Besides, at this point we’re like… frenemies. You know?” The bartender motioned at him questioningly, and he nodded an affirmative for another round. 

“Frenemies?” They cut him a suspicious sidelong glance, appraising him. 

“Yeah, like, sometimes we hate each other, sometimes we make each other laugh. We know each other’s intimate details and sometimes we use those details to either do each other wrong or right. It’s like a hate-love relationship.” 

Love? They scoffed. They almost choked. Their body bristled and they felt some awful feeling rise. 

“You mean you love me, and I hate you?” The edge in their voice was purely defensive. 

“… Sure.” He smiled down at his now empty glass, some sad smile smile. 

They felt as if they would choke on their own heart as it did some dreadful maneuver. They exhaled indignantly through their nose. 

“Nonsense.” They muttered, sinking into themself. 

“See what I mean?” He chuckled. 

They paused. They reflected on the past few hours. Yes, they did see what he meant. Unfortunately. They were too busy glaring at nothing in particular in the distance to notice how he was looking at them. 

“Whatever,” they grumbled. He all but giggled. “Shut up, with your stupid little songbird giggling.” His stupid cute little laugh. 

“Songbird giggling?” He nearly cackled. 

They felt the urge to strangle him. 

The bartender slid them their new, full drinks. They took a deep breath and sighed, trying to force their nerves into compliance. 

“I’m really going to kill you one of these days.” 

They returned to his, thoroughly inebriated, stumbling over one another, arms interlinked, the occasional push and shove, and laughing. 

“Ok so are you gonna move in with me or what?” He smiled lopsidedly up at them as he clumsily plopped down onto the sofa, reclining with his arms behind his head. 

So smug and goofy. They thought it was stupidly cute, even if his smugness was annoying. But somehow, being drunk did considerable work to push it into the cute and stupid and goofy and charming direction. 

“You really want me to live with you, don’t you?” They arched a teasing brow before stretching. Silas’s eyes lingered on the hollow of their stomach, revealed by the hem of their shirt. “Earth to Silas.” They waved a hand near his face, chuckling as they lazily slid to the ground, leaning their side against the sofa. 

“Huh? Oh, uh, I mean, I just… for you. Yknow.”

“For me.” It wasn’t a question, it was a mockery. 

“Mhm.” He nodded decisively.

They let out a trill of a laugh and shot him an unconvinced look. He responded with a meek, sheepish half smile with a half shrug. 

They sighed and shook their head, trying not to smile. That was adorable. 

“Yeah… I mean… it would be easier. The easiest option, surely. No more hunting for places, no more talking to strangers who want to get to know me, no more fretting about all the costs and whatnot…” they sighed, tired and admittedly feeling a bit defeated. 

“Exactly!” 

“But… what if… I don’t know. What if you get tired of me or something.” Their voice came out small, a barely audible mumble. 

“What if… what?” He looked at them with bleary eyes as if they’d said something completely insane. 

“I mean… we’d be spending a lot of time together. What if it got old? What if… I don’t know.” They stared at their hands, fidgeting. 

“That’s literally never going to happen. Impossible.” 

“I just… I don’t know, Silas. I can’t help but feel there’s a lot of risk in it.” 

“Risk of what?” He had the gall to look sad. 

“Oh, don’t look at me like that.” 

He continued to look at them like that. 

“It would be fun?” He offered sheepishly. 

They scoffed, looking back down at their hands. 

“Why do you want it so badly anyway?” They weren’t teasing; their voice was soft and quiet, as if at a loss. 

“Like I said – your other options would be super stressful and just kinda suck, I guess. And then it would be sooo much harder for me to annoy you and stuff.” 

And stuff. 

“God forbid you have to get in a car to annoy me,” they grumbled, rolling their eyes. 

“Yeah! And – what if I get there and you’re already in an argument with your roommate? They won’t do the dishes fast enough and you’re freaking them out with your scalpels! I don’t even know what I’d do!” 

They both chuckled. It was strangely sweet. 

“What would you do?” They smirked, narrowing their eyes suspiciously. He seemed to think for a moment. 

“I’d fight them and kidnap you. Hulk style.” 

Klaus fully cackled. What an image. 

“I’m imaging you bursting through the wall like the Kool-Aid man and just pointing at them and looking all angry. You’d probably say something stupid like ‘their scalpels are hot, and you should do the dishes,’ and then throw me over your shoulder while I beat at your back.” They managed their mental image through giggles. 

“That’s exactly what I would do,” he grinned, chuckling. 

They ignored the way the mention of him throwing them over his shoulder and protesting stirred extremely dangerous and forbidden memories. 

“And then I’d make you pay for the property damage.” They chuckled. 

“Fair.” He admitted, tilting his head. They let out a few last trills, wiping their eyes. “So…?” He gave them an expectant look. 

“I…” They wanted to, they really did – more than they would ever admit. But the fear loomed considerably. He must have seen it, because he spoke up. 

“And I highly doubt boredom will be an issue. If anything, the opposite. I mean, have you ever been bored around me? I haven’t.” 

They thought about it. No, they had never been bored around him. Quite the opposite, as he’d said. That in itself introduced a well of its own potential risks. 

“Silas…” they sighed, suddenly somber. “You realize that… that in itself… presents a plethora of risks? I know at face value, yes, it could sound ‘fun,’ but… think about it. Realistically. Something could happen. I…” they sighed, shaking their head, “I can’t believe I’m about to admit this,” their tone confirmed as much, “but I do enjoy our relationship – as much as I hate it, and you at times – deeply,” they made some shuddering face, closing their eyes for a moment, “I don’t… want something to happen.” 

“Something…?” He narrowed his eyes, tilting his head in confusion.

There was a moment when they looked painfully sober. “As cruel as we’ve been to each other, you have also been…” they closed their eyes, looking as if they were bracing themself, “shockingly kind and good to me. Moreso than anyone has ever been. Which is… probably sad. And if you ever repeat those words, I will hang your head on the wall like a game trophy,” they pinned him with a sharp look, at which his face reddened, which they ignored. “And perhaps this is selfish. And pathetic. And a slew of other unfortunate things. But I…” they sighed again, seemingly tortured, “don’t want to lose you.” The words were barely audible. 

He simply stared at them for a moment, looking considerably taken aback. 

“Oh,” was all he said for a moment before blinking back into reality. “Well, obviously, I agree. Not that it’s selfish or pathetic or whatever – none of that. I don’t want to lose you either. Why do you think I’m asking you this? Or, like… any number of other things I’ve done. I mean… any of it. All of it.” He looked at them seriously, face calm but full of several unreadable emotions. 

“Oh.” They… weren’t sure how to take that. They let out a sheepish breath of a laugh. “But, what if… I don’t know. 

“Klaus, if something were going to happen to tear us apart, it would have been any of the atrocious things we’ve done to each other.” He arched an amused brow. “But here we are.” 

Something about that made them feel… a lot of things. A lot of things all at once that were overwhelming and wonderful and terrible. That strange painful and wonderful twisting returned to their chest. 

“That’s… a very valid point.” They let out another breath of a nervous laugh. “Ok.” 

“Ok?” 

“Ok.” 

[chvoswxtch]

From one court to another court

I'm sooooooo happy for you! You deserve alllllllllll the follows (and likes and comments and reblogs)!!!

For your celebration, I would like to request a margarita with Matt that uses a similar theme to Meredith Grey's "pick me" speech from Grey's Anatomy. Not sure if you've seen it, but it's pretty angsty. The line can either come from Matt or reader. Direct quote below:

Okay, here it is. Your choice, it's simple, her or me. And I'm sure she's really great. But Derek, I love you. In a really, big really big pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your bedroom window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you... love you. So pick me. Choose me. Love me.

But for the love of all that's holy, it needs to have a happy ending 🤣

I love and appreciate you so much! Congratulations again!!!!!!!!

ahhh my lovely court!!!❤️

thank you so much, angel!! okay this is actually hilarious bc I was OBSESSED with grey's (like literally went into college as a premed bc I swore I was gonna be a surgeon) and meredith was always my favorite and the one I related to most.

i'm gonna make matty be the one to stand in the rain and pour his heart out dramatically bc he's a lil shit and I feel like he's gotten his fair share of love confessions and honestly it's his turn to beg. there is a lot of angst, but a happy, cheeky ending!

i love and appreciate YOU so much!!!! 🥂

blurb below the cut

pick me

pick me. choose me. love me.

Matt only had himself to blame for the jealousy coursing through his veins right now. He’d had his window with you. A long, six months to be exact, wide open window to confess how he really felt. There were several times along the way he almost did, when the truth nearly slipped past his lips almost as easily as his excuses for yet another superficial injury. When your hand slipped down his arm to tangle your fingers together as you languidly strolled behind Karen and Foggy down the busy streets of New York. When you leaned closer into his side as you sat together in one of the booths at Josie’s, even though you had plenty of room. When you pulled him into a quiet space to help him calm down, being able to tell when he was overstimulated just by a simple look on his face.

When he told you the truth and you didn’t yell at him. You didn’t call him a liar, or express betrayal through verbal daggers. You didn’t question the authenticity of his blindness with the revelation of his heightened senses. You didn’t walk out on him. You stayed. 

He should’ve told you that night. 

And even though he convinced himself it was safer for you if he kept his heart to himself, deep down he knew he was a coward. 

He was scared to lose you. He was afraid that he would push you too far, ask for too much patience, or break one too many promises that he wouldn’t be able to rectify with an apology and good intentions. He was terrified that he would lose you like he’d lost Elektra. He wasn’t sure what was worse; driving you to the point of resentment because of something inside himself he couldn’t tame, or that very thing tearing you away from him for good.

But neither of those things were as bad as having to endure you being happy with someone else.

Foggy had warned him from the beginning. He told Matt from the moment he met you that if he didn’t make a move, someone else was going to. Karen had cautioned him that you wouldn’t wait around forever. They were both exhausted with the drawn out pining between the two of you, secretly scheming to get one of you to cave and confess, until Matt had snuffed out that ember of hope entirely.

Karen had set you up with a coworker of hers with the intention of making Matt finally pull his head out of his ass, but when you had asked for his advice about the date, he’d told you to go.

What a fucking idiot he had been. A selfish part of him didn’t think you were going to actually enjoy yourself. He certainly didn’t think you would entertain a second date, or a third. Matt knew how you felt about him. He wasn’t stupid, and you weren’t subtle. Maybe he thought because you felt the exact same way about him, you wouldn’t actually move on.

Matt wasn’t bothered by the idea of you going on a date, but he was absolutely distraught over the reality of you being in a relationship with someone else. He was devastated by the fact that you had a boyfriend that wasn’t him. That someone else was holding your hand, making you laugh, kissing you. It made him nauseous to think of what else another man was doing to you.

He didn’t think it would last. He kept telling himself that any day now, the nightmare would be over. You would tell him that it was over, and he’d have you all to himself again.

But it had been two months, and Matt was getting nervous. What if you never broke up? What if you loved him? Did you love him more than you loved Matt? Would you marry him?

Fuck, he didn’t think he could handle that. That guy didn’t love you. Not like he did. No one could ever love you like him. No one could ever protect you as well as he could. No one was as right for you as he was. You were supposed to be with him. You were meant to be with him.

Matt gripped his cane so hard his knuckles turned white as your boyfriend placed his hand on your lower back and pressed a kiss to his shoulder. He hated that you reacted at all to his touch. But a tiny flicker of hope ignited in his heart knowing that you didn’t react to your boyfriend’s touch like you did to his. He didn’t make you shiver. He didn’t make your heart race. He didn’t make heat spread across the tops of your cheeks.

Maybe he still had a chance.

The second your boyfriend excused himself to the bathroom, Matt was tossing his cane onto the nearest table and practically running towards you, gripping onto your wrist to drag you down the hall to an empty room that he barricaded the two of you in.

“Jesus Christ, Matt! What the hell? You nearly-”

“I lied.”

“What? What are you talking about? You haven’t spoken to me all night-”

“I didn’t want you to go on the date. I don’t want to just be your friend.”

Matt’s own heart rate began to accelerate hearing the way yours started to quickly pound in your chest like thunderous warnings in a stormy sky.

“Matt-”

“I love you.”

As a shaky breath escaped your mouth, Matt tore his glasses away from his face and clutched them tightly in his hand. You always told him you felt like he hid behind them, and he wanted you to be able to see the truth on his face. Taking a step back from him and placing your hand over your forehead, you closed your eyes for a moment as your hands began to tremble.

“Why are you doing this right now?”

“Because I lied to you, and I need you to know the truth.”

“Matthew-”

“Just…listen. Please.”

Matt took several steps forward until he was standing in front of you, swallowing thickly as his hazel eyes blankly stared in your direction, searching his brain for the correct formula of words that would fix his selfish mistake and make you his.

“Okay, here it is. Your choice? It’s simple. Him, or me. And I’m sure he’s really great, but sweetheart…I love you. In a…really…really…big…pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window way, love you. So pick me. Choose me. Love me. Please…just…tell me I’m not too late.”

Matt tuned out every sound except for the roar of your heart thrashing in his ears, but it paled in volume compared to the silence that rang even louder. He detected a light layer of sweat forming along your hairline, and your nails were dug so deeply into your hands, he could almost feel the blood pushing against the taut, clammy skin of your palm. You exhaled through your nose in a jagged and swift pattern, and there was heat burning in your face, but Matt couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was from right now.

“S-Say something.”

“You’re fucking unbelieveable.”

Matt’s tongue darted out quickly to wet his lips as he shifted his weight onto his other foot, placing his hands on his waist while he cleared his throat and tilted his head in your direction.

“Say…something else.”

Throwing your hands up in defeat, you laughed humorlessly as you turned away from him.

“Six months, Matthew. I waited six months for you-”

“I know-”

“And God, I practically did everything but come right out and say I was in love with you-”

“I know, sweetheart-”

“And after everything, all those times you made me believe there was something more, like I wasn’t crazy and reading too much into things. You know, when you finally told me the truth I thought…I thought this is it. I thought that was the last thing holding you back from me but then-you told me to go out with him-”

“I was scared.”

Matt’s confession halted your furious pacing, and he suddenly felt nervous under the intensity of your unwavering gaze. Dipping his head between his shoulders, he let out a deep sigh as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

“People have gotten hurt…because of me. Because of who I really am. I lost-Elektra died in my arms. Twice. I thought…I thought I was protecting you. I thought not being with me…was what was best for you. But…I can’t do it. I thought I could, but I was wrong. I can’t…you can’t be with him. You don’t belong with him, sweetheart. You belong with me.”

“You are the most infuriating man I have ever met in my life.”

The anger had dissipated from your voice, but your heart’s rhythm never faltered, and a melancholic smile glossed over Matt’s lips.

“I know. You still love me?”

An exaggerated sigh flew past your lips as you settled your hands on your hips, shaking your head slowly while staring up at him.

“Well someone has to.”

Matt’s lips parted slightly, and his face morphed into an expression of anticipation feeling the edge of your mouth quirk upwards slowly. He took a cautious step forward, reaching out a hand for yours as an excited grin threatened to take over his entire mouth.

“So…it…it’s me?”

“You know for an Ivy League graduate, you’re not very bright. It’s always been you, Matty.”

The smile that stretched open Matt’s mouth would’ve made you think he had just won a contest, and he didn’t hesitate to rush forward to grab your face in his hands, pulling you in for a long overdue kiss that had you both sighing in content against each other's lips. 

“Shit.”

“What?”

“I…I have to tell him.”

Matt’s lips pulled into a mischievous smirk as he wrapped his arm tightly around your waist, pulling you closer into his chest as he nudged his nose against yours.

“Can I tell him?”

“Matthew!”

“What?”

“Don’t be an ass.”

“I’d let him down gently.”

“No you wouldn’t.”

Matt snickered as he lifted his brows slightly in agreement, leaning in to seek out your lips for another greedy kiss.

“No I wouldn’t.”

[saberdeity]

𝐀𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 》 𝐏𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐨 𝐒𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐛𝐞𝐫

pairings - Pablo Schreiber x fem!reader

summary - after being away too long, you need some attention from your handsome fiancé

warnings - 18+, mature themes, strong language, major fluff

a/n - ever since watching the halo series I have been obsessed with Pablo, I mean how can you not be?! this man is beautiful and adorable and ahhh I cannot even explain! anyway we need more works for this guy!! so I decided to at least try. plus this gif of him makes me want to sit on his lap, touch his chest and never ever leave. I hope you guys like it all feedback is welcome and appreciated 💕

Pablo was a hopeless romantic, he wanted to make you smile in every possible way he could. You were living the dream with him, everything about him was perfect and everyone you talked to always moaned about not still being in the honeymoon phase but 3 years in and you could safely say you still were with him.

Since he was shooting Halo, he had been in many different countries which required a lot of time and a lot travelling meaning during these months he was away from home. You knew this would happen when you first got together with him and three years on it still never gets any easier. He'd been away for almost 4 months and to say you missed him was an understatement.

You were counting down the hours from when he'd told you he was boarding the plane. You wanted to make sure everything was perfect for when he arrived home so you cooked his favourite meal, stocked the fridge and pantry with all of his favourite snacks and foods also making sure the house was entirely clean. By the time you had finished, he was due back any minute and the excitement was almost too much to bare at this point. When you heard the car pull up you did everything you could not to burst out of the front door and run into his arms which you usually would have done but you knew he would be so tired. Soon enough he came through the door looking as perfect as ever.

"baby?" he called out, his voice laced with relief yet tiredness "I'm home" He adds before you come running around the corner.

"You're home!" you whisper shout excitedly, jogging over to him and wrapping your arms around him so tight you surprised yourself with the amount of strength you had.

He couldn't help but chuckle at your reaction as he wrapped his arms around you also quickly dropping his bags to the floor. From the sheer size difference you only being 5"6 and Pablo standing at 6'4 you were just about managing to reach him standing on your tip-toes but Pablo had the best solution. His broad arms wrapped around your waist before he effortlessly lifted you into his embrace, your legs wrapping around his waste and connecting around his back automatically.

"I've missed you so much my love" you whispered softly, burying your head into the crook of his neck, peppering soft kisses to any part of the skin there that you could reach.

"I've missed you more bubba" He smiles, pressing the softest kiss to your temple.

You both stayed like this for a while, just enjoying one another embrace and company before things began turning back to normal. Whilst you finished up dinner, Pablo began to unpack his bags and get cleaned up. The day of travelling had taken its toll on him so a much needed nap was taken.

You felt selfish feeling the need for his attention especially with how hard he's been working he deserved some down time but you couldn't help but need him, crave him all the time. His smell drove you insane, the musky yet minty fragrance ignited the flame inside you like a match to gasoline and you soon began to feel the tingle in between your legs get greater and greater. The tingle grew even more when you noticed him slouched on the couch with his tight white t-shirt and his favourite sweatpants which he knew drove you crazy.

You stood admiring from the doorway, your index finger in between your lips as you drooled at the sight in front of you. Your friends always complained about their boyfriends playing video games but when yours looked so good doing it, there was nothing to complain about. Pablo noticed after a while of your staring.

"C'mere beautiful" he signals, a cheeky smile plastering across his face as you made your way over.

You smirked, throwing your legs over his and straddling his hips, sitting on the rightful throne of his thighs. Your hands slowly moved from his abdomen and over his chest, gently pressing at the toned muscles beneath his shirt. You couldn't help the movement of your hips as his huge hands placed themselves firmly on your hips. You slowly leant over, pressing your chest against his before connecting your lips to his. The kiss was slow and passionate at the start before quickly turning into pure desperation. You could feel his appendage pressing against your lower abdomen as a smirk appeared on your lips.

"feels like somebody else missed me too" you smirked wiggling your hips a little as he chuckled.

[gangrenados]

dude im so disappointed alfred is dead in titans. its totally unfair. 10/10 for fanfic purposes im just gonna ignore that part so i can imagine pretty boy dickie bringing his babies to meet alfred for the first time

AHHH THIS IS SO CUTE.

(Not proof read)

Dick's heart can't bear more joy as he watches your five year old son through the reviewer mirror, kissing your pregnant belly.

He has been such a good kid, always offering to help you and also saying that he will teach his new baby sibling how to play. Little John wants to be big brother so fast.

Life has taken a turn for the better, letting Dick have what he always desired and much more. He doesn't take this joy for granted, nobody in the vigilante business would do it anyway.

Years of witnessing the horrors of humanity as you do your best to make the world a better place left you praising the little things in life. At this point waking up without back pain and a nice bowl of his favorite cereal is enough to put Dick in a good mood for the rest of the day.

"You good, my love?" He nods, not sure if the butterflies in his stomach is due happiness or nervousness. Whatever the case might be, it's to late back down.

After years of miscommunication between Bruce and Dick has left the man grow old without witnessing the ups and downs of becoming a grandparent. Such a funny thing considering how desperate Bruce was back in the day about using protection and not making him any grandkids.

Dick even remembers that awkward day when Bruce 'gifted' him an entire box full of condoms since "You never know" might happen.

Alfred was one of his torturers too, but unlike Bruce the butler didn't hesitated to tell Dick the atrocities that might happen to him if he didn't use some protection. It was so mortifying having to hear about the nastiest STDS and it's symptoms.

Dick knew that meant the better for him, but those are conversations he will never be able to forget.

Oh Alfred! Another victim in that miscommunication issue that make Dick fly on his own and make a name for himself. All the things there were unsaid, all those bottle up feelings left hanging between a kid and what grew to be his grandfather.

Dick felt his heart tighten at the memories, the good and the bad, and how Alfred always was there for giving him a hand in case of need. He has been so selfish.

"This is so big!" Your kid said in amusement, not taking his little hands from the fogged mirror as he saw the big mansion approach.

Dick laughed at his son behavior, he was like him so many years ago." Yes it is buddy, wait to see the pool. You might like it."

And the time passes, rather quickly for Dick liking, and before he notices, he's helping you go up those little stairs as your kid is already knocking on the door and doing whatever he can to get to that promised pool.

"John wait-" Dick's cut by the sound of the front door opening, there's a tall and thin man dressed in elegant yet comfortable clothes looking down at this little boy who looking back up with curiosity.

"My goodness...." Alfred mumbles as he notices how this strange kid is the spitting sight of Dick when he was a little boy, when he just came into Wayne's manor.

Dick holds his breath, grabbing your hand firmly as he tries to find the words to break the ice. "Hi."

That's the best he can come up with once he gets the enough strength to go and grab his kid. "Long time no see, right?"

"Alfred you don't need to attend the door-" another voice appears and in short time Bruce Wayne puts a foot in the scene, being forgotten by everyone else since the participants are too absorbed in their own emotions to acknowledge the rest.

"Master Dick, you're back!" Alfred says with glee, in his mouth an smile appears as he finally accepts this. His old soul finding content to be able to see the little circus boy again, just slightly different now.

Bruce swallows dryly, not knowing how to process this, and Dick feels the need to push back the overbearing emotions that want to present themselves.

"Yeah," He says dumbfounded, caught in the emotional part of this family reunion.

"Who are these people, dad?" John dared to ask, tugging at Dick's shirt and causing his dad to come back to reality.

Alfred and Bruce's eyes widened with surprise at the boy little words, a gesture that didn't go unnoticed by Dick.

" Uh, em, this is my family. My wife y/n and my son John. We were passing by and decided to pay a little visit, hope you don't mind." You pursued your lips in a thin line at Dick's obvious lie, at least he was talking to his family face to face.

"So you have a family?" All eyes fell on Bruce, and Dick stiffen in preparation to hear what he had to say." And I can see there's another baby coming. Are you happy, son?"

The question caught Dick off guard, he frowned before saying." Yes, I am, Bruce."

"Good, I'm glad you are." Such a simple answer held many emotions behind it, to summarize it there was a big chance Bruce was just happy to see Dick having that sweet life.

And he couldn't deny that watch Alfred bonding with his great grandson was a sight he never knew he would get to see.

Bruce walked up to Dick, patting his shoulder with pride. "There's a lot of things we need to caught on."

Dick intertwines his hand with yours, gently pulling you closer to him as he offers one of those smile of his. "Sure there are."

[babyboibucky]

Charming (Part 2 of Charm)

Pairing: TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky has everything planned out for his date with you.

Word Count: 2,566

Warnings: No TFATWS spoilers here, Bucky being charming (hence the title) is a warning in itself

A/N: Ahhh you guys, thank you for all the love for Charm! I didn’t expect for that oneshot to receive so much love from everyone. Can’t thank y’all enough!!! For those who haven’t read it yet, make sure to do so before reading this!

Charm (Part 1) || MAIN MASTERLIST

Bucky nervously waited outside of your apartment building. He made sure to plan really well for this date, he didn’t want to mess up. He really liked talking to you and he wanted you to enjoy this day.

“Okay, I’m ready!” You announced as you stepped out of the building, jogging downstairs to approach him.

You looked excited, Bucky noticed. Okay, that’s good. He’s off to a good start. He found himself smiling at you, admiring this light and bright aura that radiated off of you. He could use a little light in his life and it might be too soon for Bucky to even consider it, but you seemed like the perfect girl to him.

“Hi.” Bucky greeted. “You look beautiful.” He said, eyeing you from head to toe.

Bucky’s confidence grew when your cheeks turned pink at his compliment. You thanked him and let your eyes fall to his left arm, making Bucky instantly regret his decision to forego the gloves. He should’ve worn his jacket on top of his blue henley. All his worries though eventually dissipated when you reassured him.

“Glad you aren’t wearing your gloves, it looked really uncomfortable.” You told him genuinely.

Bucky shyly let out a chuckle, “Yeah.”

“So, to the park?” You asked excitedly.

Bucky made a face, “Actually, I thought of changing our plans a bit. Hope that’s alright?” He asked hopefully.

You narrowed your eyes at him as you nodded, “Hmm, that sounds interesting. Alright then, what do you got?”

Embarrassment filled Bucky’s entire being when he whipped out a folded piece of paper from his back pocket. He glanced at you and watched your expression as he unfolded it, revealing it to be the size of a bond paper where he had written down his agenda for the day.

“Oh wow, that’s...very interesting.” You pointed out but with no malice. In fact, you were impressed.

Who would’ve thought that guys nowadays came to a date prepared? But then again, Bucky wasn’t from this time but truly appreciated how old-fashioned he still was.

Bucky rubbed his neck, “I made an itinerary but saying that out loud, it actually sounds terrible.”

“Not at all!” You were quick to defend. “I like a well-planned day. I’m not really the spontaneous type so this really works well for me.” You chuckled.

Bucky bit his lip to stop himself from smiling too wide. It seemed like the date would go pretty well, he hoped it’d last the entire day though. He couldn’t help but worry that something might happen that would throw you off. Or that he might end up saying things that you’d find offensive.

“What’s first on the itinerary?” You asked.

-

“I got a strike!” You squealed in excitement and pumped your first in the air.

Bucky took you to a bowling place and honestly, he didn’t expect for you to be so excited about it. He felt silly for outdoing himself for this first date. In fact, he researched about dating in the modern day the moment he got home after meeting you. The tips were very different, some of which he wasn’t comfortable doing. So instead of adjusting to the present, Bucky stayed true to himself.

He was going to do it his own way, no matter how traditional it seemed. This led him to writing down his ideas on a piece of paper and planning everything out properly.

“Looks like I won.” You smirked, seeing the scores flash on the television hanging on the ceiling. “Did you go easy on me? Tell me the truth, Bucky.” You warned as you looked at him suspiciously.

Bucky chortled and shook his head, “I didn’t. It’s been decades since the last time I did this so I got pretty rusty at it.” He explained.

“You ready to grab something to eat?” He asked, checking the time and seeing that it was close to three in the afternoon.

You nodded enthusiastically, “I’m starving! I mean, beating a super soldier at bowling can be really exhausting.” You teased.

Bucky smiled, “Great, but can we stop by somewhere first?”

-

Bucky felt proud at himself when he saw the astonished look in your face.

“Oh my god, is this...?” You asked, eyeing the car that Bucky drove out of a car rental shop.

“A 1942 Pontiac Torpedo.” Bucky boasted before stepping out of the car and leading you towards the front seat.

Bucky waited for you to slip in, your expression still that of utter disbelief, before closing the door and walking around to ride back inside.

“And it’s the convertible one.” He said proudly and laughed at your reaction when he brought down the roof.

“I have no words for this, Bucky. This is amazing!” You exclaimed, running your hands on the compartment and just taking in the beautiful interiors of the vintage car.

Bucky watched you with a soft look in his eyes. He felt kind of selfish for gloating at the fact that this date only proved to himself that he still is James Buchanan Barnes. Despite decades of torture and brainwashing as the Winter Soldier, he still had pieces of himself left.

But seeing you so giddy at the date that he poured so much effort in? Maybe he wasn’t so selfish after all.

“And where will you be taking us next for you to rent this lovely vehicle? I honestly don’t know what to expect after this. I’m just...I love it!” You laughed, unable to hide your excitement.

“We’re having burgers and milkshakes.” Bucky announced.

-

Bucky wanted you to experience what it was like dating in his time, so it was only right that he took you to a diner. But it wasn’t just the regular one, he took you to a drive-in diner where waitresses even wore roller derby skates.

“You just keep on outdoing yourself, Bucky. I’m speechless!” You laughed.

The waitress rolled by your car and took your orders. After she left, there was finally a moment of peace which allowed you and Bucky to have an actual conversation.

“Did you often hang out in one of these places then?” You asked.

Bucky smiled at the memories, “Yeah, used to take Steve with me. He always ended up getting mad whenever he realized that it was a set-up for a double date.”

You hummed in amusement. “You seemed really popular with the ladies, huh?”

Bucky chuckled timidly before letting out a sigh. He turned to you curiously and creased his forehead, “Why didn’t you tell me you knew who I was?” He finally asked.

You seemed surprised at his question but your features softened up almost immediately. Shrugging as if it was no big deal, you told him that you really didn’t feel the need to do so.

“Would it change anything if I told you I knew who you were?” You curiously asked.

Bucky thought for a brief moment, “I probably would’ve excused myself and left.”

“That’s what I thought.” You said. “You seemed comfortable then, I didn’t want to overwhelm you by bringing it up. Besides, I really don’t care about it. I mean, I had fun talking to you and that’s all that matters to me. Superhero or not, I do enjoy your company.”

Bucky snickered, “I don’t think superhero is the right word.”

“You’ll be surprised that a lot of people call you that.” You said, placing a hand on Bucky’s arm, squeezing it to offer him comfort.

Bucky loosened up at your touch and kept his gaze lingering on how your fingers were wrapped around his arm.

“There’s this one kid at the orphanage I volunteer at,” you said, letting go of Bucky’s arm as you adjusted your position in the car so you could turn to him. Bucky almost missed the warmth from your hand on his skin.

“I asked them to draw someone they looked up to and this is his work.” You said, bringing out your phone to show Bucky a photo of the drawing.

Bucky’s breath hitched when you handed him your phone, revealing that the kid drew a man with long brown hair and a metal arm. He used black and gold to color the metal arm, not silver. It didn’t even have the red star on it. When Bucky looked up at you, he saw the most genuine smile he had ever seen.

“I asked him why he chose you and he said that he liked how Captain America’s best friend fought alongside him. For a kid his age, he knew a lot about your history too. He’s a huge fan.” You laughed.

Bucky’s eyes almost brimmed with tears. He was unable to believe that a kid would look up to him, consider him a superhero. All this time he had been seeing himself as a villain still, the bad guy. Someone who would have a hard time redeeming himself. You made him think twice about it, that maybe he had been too harsh on himself.

“You should come with me to the orphanage some time. The kids will love you, Bucky. It’s not that hard to do so.” You said softly, lifting your hand up to fix a strand of Bucky’s hair that was out of place.

It was a beautiful moment between the two of you. Bucky felt vulnerable but safe, like you’d keep him safe. Not from danger but from his very own destructive thoughts. Whenever he loses control of his mind, whenever it wanders into the darkest parts of his past, Bucky tends to self-destruct. And he almost wandered there but you were quick to pull him back to the surface.

“What are you thinking of?” You asked when you noticed that Bucky was just staring at you.

Bucky’s gaze fell onto your lips and then back at your eyes, “Thinking about whether I should just go for it now.”

“Go for what?” You blinked.

Bucky slowly leaned in but was immediately startled when the waitress arrived with your orders.

-

After the diner, Bucky drove to the park where the two of you walked around while talking about well, anything. He learned more about you and this time, he didn’t have to lie about anything whenever you asked him. In fact, Bucky got really comfortable opening up about his life in the 40’s, he even talked about his family.

The two of you talked more until the sun set and the next thing you knew was that Bucky brought you to a drive-in theater and bought pizza to cap off the date.

-

It was a little past ten in the evening when Bucky drove you home. He opened the car door for you and nervously fidgeted with the piece of paper in his back pocket.

“So did you tick off everything on the itinerary?” You asked.

Bucky let out the fakest laugh because no, he hasn’t ticked off everything on his list. There was one more thing that he planned to do at the very end of the date. He had been confident about it, especially after how much you enjoyed the date in its entirety. But, now standing outside your apartment building and staring at you nervously, he wasn’t sure whether he had enough courage to pull this off.

“I uhh...well...” Bucky stammered. “Did you enjoy?” He asked again, just to be sure.

“I am offended that you had to ask because I thought my face was unable to hide at how much I did!” You laughed.

“Thank you for giving me the 1940s experience. I love it. I really do, it’s...it’s been a while since I last went on a date that I really enjoyed.” You shyly admitted, biting your lip and looking up at Bucky through your lashes.

Bucky’s breath got caught in his throat as he gazed down at you. You looked really beautiful, no matter how simple you looked. He wanted to take you out to another date, maybe tomorrow. Or the next day perhaps, actually, Bucky wanted to be with you every single day.

You were so kind and bubbly, you offered so much light to his darkness. He loved how your hopeful attitude rubbed off on him, he badly needed it. And he loved how you made him feel...himself. He was just Bucky Barnes, a guy navigating through the modern times and finding his place in this world. And it would seem like an easy task with you by his side.

“Well, I guess this is it.” You said. “Thanks again, Bucky. I really did enjoy.”

Bucky was surprised when you stepped closer to him for a hug. Feeling your arms wrap around his waist and your hair brush against his chin gave him the boost of confidence he needed to finally check off the last on his date itinerary.

By the time he convinced himself to do it, you already stepped back and bid Bucky good night.

Bucky proved to himself the other night that he still has his charm from back then. And tonight, he was going to prove that his charm was going to sweep you off of your feet.

“Wait, one last thing.” Bucky said, reaching out for your wrist.

He tugged you forward making you squeal, and then wrapped his metal arm around your waist before swooping you down for a kiss.

Bucky wasn’t sure how you would react to his kiss but he could no longer hold himself back. It could either make or break his friendship with you, but Bucky just had to. And it wasn’t just to prove something to himself, he’d been wanting to kiss you all throughout the day. He would have already, at the diner, if only the waitress didn’t interrupt his little moment with you.

He almost panicked when your lips remained still, but it all went away when he felt your hands wrap around his shoulders before finally kissing him back. Bucky’s lips curled into a smile against yours as he slowly straightened, bringing you back up before pulling away.

You panted against his lips, your hands sliding down to rest on Bucky’s chest as his landed on your hips.

“Was that...was that a part of your list?” You breathlessly asked.

“Yes. Almost went for it at the diner but I guess the universe wanted for me to stick to the schedule.” He grinned.

You threw your head back in laughter, “So that’s what you meant by that!”

Bucky laughed in agreement and held your face in his metal hand, noticing how you weren’t thrown off. Instead, you turned your face to even press a kiss on his palm.

“Was I too fast? Kissing you on the first date?” He asked, caressing your face.

You shook your head, “You did wait until the end of the date to do so, I guess your timing was just right.”

“And...how was it?” Bucky meekly asked, almost afraid that he might have sucked given that this was his first kiss in decades.

Smiling, you leaned in again to give him a quick peck on the lips. A reassurance, something to melt Bucky’s worries away.

“What can I say? James Bucky Barnes, you are one charming man.”

Now, Bucky was a hundred percent sure that he still has it in him. And he made a mental note to boast to Yori how his first date with you went.

-

Everything Bucky Tag List:

@ddowii @jessou893 @stealapizzamyheart @bagelofthelord @mxnt @dontputyourfckingdrinkonmytable @jeeperky @ohladymacbeth @wildflowergubler @supraveng @twinerd14 @buckysmar  @bakugouswh0r3 @sweetcoldharmony @wintersfilm @charminivy @amelia-song-pond @iamvalentinaconstanza @mcubqrnes @i’m-squished @tcc-gizmachine @sipsteacasually @tcc-gizmachine @prettyintopeerpressure​ @weloveyasmin @est19xxshit​ @bloodhon3yx​ @dressed-in-prada​ @lizette50​ @​thatfangirl42

Sign up on my tag list here - https://forms.gle/b5haFXewSKqnXxxh7

Some tags aren’t walking ugh I’m so sorry to all those that tumblr failed to tag!

[kkeidawrites]

AHHH idk rlly know if you still do requests but if u still do could u do Adrian tepes x black reader

Where after the battle in season 2 reader initially went with sypha and trevor to help them with whatever they were gonna do but y/n ends missing adrian (and was tired of those to goofing all the time) so in the dead of night y/n takes some supplies and runs back to the castle. And when she sees the castle in sight she throws open the doors and starts looking for alucard

(Fluff)

Ur account is like my safe place I don't find many black readers/ writers so I absolutely love your posts ❤❤

Thank you so much for saying that I do try when I write and I want people to be inspired to write more black reader stories or actually more black leads in stories’ I’m not sure if you wanted the reader to be male/female or gender neutral, so you can decide as you read along! And yes, I am still open to requests!

$$$$$$$$$$$$$&$$$$$$$$$$$$$&$$$$$$$$$$

It was like a breath of fresh air when Y/n saw the looming infamous castle of Walachia. Y/N had made the decision to leave with Trevor and Sypha, thinking it was the best decision. But was it? As the covered wagon rolled down the dirt path leading away from the castle, Y/N felt her heart break.

Y/N could tell as the three of them departed the widowed dhampir, that he did not want them to leave. As Y/N thought about it, after being away for two weeks, that when Dracula’s reign had ended, Trevor and Sypha felt that they needed to leave right after. Y/N thought their abrupt departure was selfish both on their part and on Y/N’s as well.

Y/N still didn’t know what the original plan was in the first place when getting on that wagon with Sypha and Trevor. Y/N felt it was the right thing to do. Was it the right thing to do? The question constantly whispered in Y/N’s head.

The wagon stopped one evening and Trevor suggested that they rest here and continue on to Argeis come morn. Sypha noticed Y/N’s quiet nature that evening, usually when she and Trevor were arguing or playful banter, Y/N would chime in but it seemed that entire week, her playful quips wasn’t heard as much as Sypha thought.

It concerned the Speaker and she questioned if there was anything wrong. Y/N gave off a wavered yes of being alright and told the Speaker that only the thoughts rattling in the mind was all that was wrong.

Sypha didn’t question Y/N anymore and rolled over in the wagon to get some much needed and deserved sleep. Y/N opted to sleep outside to ponder the thoughts plaguing them. Twisting and turning in the sleeping bag, didn’t help at all and Y/N sat up with a huff.

Y/N felt anxious. This wasn’t the life planned out, not like this, not alone. Well, other than Trevor and Sypha’s presence, Y/N felt alone in the Wallachian world.

Where Y/N forlorn, the color of your skin was dark and your hair was kinky and coiled. The heat of the country seemed like second nature and the many animals that roamed and only seen in that country was its own majesty.

Someone completely different than what you saw in Walachia. Y/N was born to a single mother, their father had been killed by those accursed night monsters and since then Y/N had made it their mission to become a strong dual swordsman, studying under the elders of the people under the sun and learning the medicines that would keep them alive in this world.

Y/N and Alucard’s meet was an interesting one. Their initial meeting was when the trio were on their way to Dracula’s castle and night creatures had made their appearance in Gresit where Y/N was vacating after evacuating Lupu.

Y/N was fighting off the monsters in Gresit and saved a couple of children when the trio arrived and made light work of the rest. Y/N didn’t want anyone to know that they existed and made haste to leave in the shadows to avoid the people most importantly the church.

In the past, Y/N’s mother was subjected by the church in Lupu for her darker skin. Believing that such dark skin was the skin of a demon raised from Hell to walk along humans. Y/N’s mother, a spitfire set the priest straight and told him if Devil wanted to have her raise death and destruction on Earth then he would have asked for it already.

It also didn’t help the fact that the priest’s goons would come after Y/N and Y/N’s mother, harassing them all the time and trying to run them out of town. Y/N’s mother always stood strong and fought those goons off whenever they tried to get physical; sending them back to their puppet master with their strings twisted.

So, it was no surprise when Y/N had met the trio by accidentally running into the dhampir while attempting to escape through an alley. His solid figure made Y/N’s hood fall off their head and the coils of their hair is what brought the attention of the trio.

Alucard made a comment, curious about the coils, it was almost childlike when he asked. Y/N was thrown off guard by the question and made haste to leave the area quietly but the speaker stopped Y/N asking if they were familiar with the area and where they could get a covered wagon.

Y/N didn’t answer her question and moved to leave once more only to be stopped once more, by the dhampir again. His calm demeanor and honeyed words brought Y/N’s attention to the man. At first, Y/N mind was not on talking to anyone but, once their eyes found Alucard’s gold ones Y/N was intrigued.

As a help them help you situation, Y/N was persuaded by Sypha to help them end Dracula’s murderous reign and Y/N agreed. Y/N didn’t care if Alucard was the son of Dracula, it was the fact that Y/N’s mother lived in Argeis and the thought of her killed by the creatures of the night didn’t sit right.

In the little time the four were together, it seemed that Alucard and Y/N were the first to interact with one another more than Sypha and Trevor. They could relate with one another in a way, both their mothers strong, smart and knowing that helping people no matter the ideas they had or if they didn’t want it, was deserved to anyone.

When his father had died, Y/N was there by his side to shield him from the swirling ashes of hell demons as a way to let him know that it was alright to grieve his father.

Y/N had made her decision. Staying with Trevor and Sypha was fun but, this wasn’t the life Y/N sought for.

Going to the wagon, Y/N swiped a small bag of food, just some cheeses and bread and left behind a quick note to Sypha and a little joke to Trevor’s smell then left to return to the castle.

Presently, Y/N walked up the stone steps to the large double doors of the castle and didn’t care to knock. Pushing open the doors, Y/N marveled the recently cleaned up entrance hall, the furnished red rugs were either burnt or ripped and the statues were all destroyed.

“Alucard?” Y/N calls and makes haste to the twin stairwell.

Now that they were here, Y/N needed to find the dhampir and tell him how sorry they were for leaving him behind. For leaving him alone.

“Alucard!” Y/N made their way up the two flights of stairs, searching for the dhampir.

Where could he have gone? Y/N’s mind scrambled for any explanation or idea as to where he could have gone.

“The Hold!” Y/N exclaimed and rushed down the two flights, hoping that he would not leave in time for Y/N to find him.

However, as soon as Y/N reached the entrance hall, the man of the hour was walking up the right side of the two stairwells and paused on the third step up, his eyes wide from realization of Y/N’s sudden appearance. His right hand gripped the small yellow basket and Y/N’s eyes widened then lowered in relief.

“Alucard…there you are.” Y/N sighed, grateful that he was alright and made their way down the same stairwell to see him closer.

“I was worried something happened to you, you know this castle is big as hell-”

“Y/N.” Alucard’s quiet gasp of their name made Y/N grin as they grew closer to him.

“I think being with Sypha and Trevor for too long has made you forget me, Alucard. That’s not nice. I thought we were friends? You don’t forget your friends-”

Arms wrapped around Y/N’s waist and a warm body hugged their front as Alucard sighed into Y/N’s coily hair, inhaling their scent to make himself sure that they were real and here in his arms.

“I could never forget you, Y/N…never ever.” He told Y/N. Y/N arms wrapped around him just as snug and rubbed their cheek into his bird chest, a smile gracing their lips.

“Will you stay?” His question makes Y/N look up at him and their smile grows wider as they nodded.

“Yes. I will stay.”

[rollercoasterwords]

I learnt about the existence of this fic a while back but I didn't knew if I was going to be able to handle the parts on that house and his parents and surprisingly I was able to keep together? But Regulus? Everytime they're relationship broke a bit more my heart break to you portrait the relationship very well wich only means it make very sad. But it was so good

And I'm enjoying this fic so much I love the way you Sirius's thought process around his queerness, how it was all there but he just ignore it till Remus kisses him and then he just goes around it without being able to name it, bc of how he was raise and is painfully to read but necessary in a way

I have been enjoying this lasts chapters where Sirius is kind of letting himself feel and trying to understand why he feels they he is feeling and now he is very confuse about the whole Chris thing , but he is getting there

I'm so excited for the summer chapters! I'm excited to see how he is going start feeling comfortable with his queerness and now he is going to be able to thing about how lovely his Moony is without any restrictions.

Thank u so much for this fic :)

ahhh thank u for taking the time to write such a long message haha!! i’m so happy to hear that ur enjoying the fic, it’s been a real labor of love so it means a lot to hear that other people are loving it too 💕 i know u aren’t actually asking any questions in this but i’m probably gonna write a long response anyway just bc i love to talk abt this stuff haha

exploring sirius’s home life + relationship with regulus was one of the main reasons i wanted to write this fic and it definitely felt like a balancing act between wanting to portray an extremely horrible and abusive situation but also not wanting to get gratuitously graphic. sometimes i’m still not sure i got it entirely right, but that’s just the nature of writing i guess!

and omg yes regulus and sirius!! definitely one of my favorite things to write, i wasn’t really anticipating how much i’d have to be trying to get into regulus’s head to write their relationship when i started but now i’ve spent so much time thinking about what he would have been thinking/feeling throughout the years that he almost feels like the second main character to me (even though he doesn’t show up too much in the actual story)

the internalized homophobia was another aspect of sirirus’s character that made him so compelling to me and another thing i was really excited to try and write; it definitely hit close to home because i grew up in a conservative religious environment and really wasn’t able to fully come to terms with my own sexuality until after i got to college. i think it can be understandably difficult to really empathize for marauders fans who have had the good fortune to grow up in more open and accepting environments, and especially from remus’s perspective it sometimes comes off as sirius being selfish and cruel. while i do think he was being selfish during 6th year, i don’t think it was in the way many people seemed to interpret, so i really wanted to try and show how being raised in a homophobic environment, especially one as violent and abusive as sirius’s, creates these very deep-rooted mental walls that can take a really long time to break through. it doesn’t erase the hurt he caused remus, but it helps show that the situation wasn’t necessarily so black and white, especially because remus was simultaneously hiding and holding back a lot of things.

and yes, now we’re finally getting some semblance of self-acceptance with summer coming up :) i’m doing my best to keep it realistic with the tension between his internalized prejudices and his realization that being queer isn’t necessarily the broken thing he thought it was; hopefully it works! i’m so excited to share w u all, i know the summer ‘77 chapters are a lot of people’s favorites 💕

[alice-angel12x]

💔Dainseif x Reader

a bit Houseki no Kuni crossover/ characters

It's been so long since the fall of Khaenri'ah, there isn't much I remember from those times. Most of which are small facts and details most likely lost to time. Though there is one precious thing or person I remember before the Gods' wrath fell upon the city, their name was Y/n. I remember their lovely smile, their warm embrace, the softness of their skin, and their melodious voice whispering sweet nothing into my ear.

Sadly they were taken from me in the destruction of Khaenri'ah. It was my duty as the Twilight Sword to protect the people of Khaenri'ah, to protect them, and I failed. A curse of long life was placed upon me as many of the people turned and transformed into monsters.

I fell into despair when the strange goddess from Celestia appeared before me. If I were to stop the rebellion from the abyss, she would return what I lost. At first, I had no idea what she could have meant, but I would learn soon. In desperation, I foolishly agreed to her wishes, looking back now I shouldn't have so stupidly agreed. The gods have never blessed me in the past, I should have never hoped they would in the future. After so long many details of Y/n have faded, and at times I wonder if they were just my imagination.  Yet I did meet strange people along my travels, one of them had grown dear to me.

---------

The last thing I remember is seeing a red sky with a strange goddess glaring down at everyone below. Red and black cubes floated about her. Some was calling out a name, Y/n I believe, then suddenly everything goes black as I was shoved to the ground. During that time of darkness, all I could feel was a strong will. I didn't want to perish and return too... I can no longer remember. Whenever I try to search my mind all I can find is a strange figure standing ahead of me, with its hand outstretched to me.

When I finally opened my eyes, I found myself surrounded by ruins that had long burned. Plants grew through the fissures in the destroyed stones, many skeletons were scattered along the ground. I felt strange for some reason, looking down at my arms, they sparkled in the sunlight. It shined a gleaming blue, it looked like Noctilucous Jade. My whole body seemed to be made of it; my legs, fingers, even my (Hair length) hair glimmered of the gem. Who am I?

I shakily got to my feet, as my body shined in the sun. The land ahead was a beautiful green as the leaves and trees swayed in the gentle wind. I was quite obviously alone, but why? Why was I so desperate for life? Maybe If I wander about I'll... Find my answer.

-------------

As I tracked the abyss, I came across a small group of the abyss mages. Who was occupied with corning some poor wanderer, raising my hand and unleashing my power made quick work of the horrid creatures. Something was off about this wanderer, so I approached cautiously. This being looked to be made of precious material, jade perhaps. Yet their form looked familiar to me, somehow.

A brief image of Y/n flashed in my mind. Yet I quickly shook my head, they are not the same. Everyone from Khaenri'ah

"umm, thank you, sir," They said as they slowly stood.

As looked them over, and noticed they wore greatly diminished garments of a Khaenri'ahen citizen. "Where did you get those clothes?" I asked.

"I don't know, I just woke up with these clothes," The being said as they looked down at their clothes.

"So wondered, why do you travel teyvat?" I asked them.

"I do not remember, I just remember not wanting to parish and return to someone. Yet I can't remember who?" they said with a confused look in their eyes. " Why do you travel?"

"That is not important," I said simply.

"So why do your eyes appear so sad?" They asked again.

"What do you mean?" I asked them.

"You seem lonely. Can I travel with you, just till I find my answer," They begged?

Staring at their sparkling face, I couldn't shake that feeling of familiarity. Still, if they really are a tiny few of Khaenri'ahen that survive, and didn't turn into monsters. I guess their companionship would be fine I suppose.

"If that is what you wish I won't stop you, but I will be following dangerous monsters. I will not always be able to protect you, so follow at your own risk," I warned them.

"Thank you, Mr... Umm,"

"Dainseif," I answered. ," And what of your name?"

"Mr.Dainseif," They smiled warmly

"I don't remember my name, I'm not sure if I have one," The being said.

"Hmm, well from now on your name is... Jade," Dainseif said.

"Well, my name is jade. Mr.Dainseif,"

--------------------------

It has been 500 years since the fall of Khaenri'ah.

I have been traveling with Jade for almost as long, even when they learned many things of me. Even when the abyss princess offered Jade the option to join her and her war on destiny, Jade always remained by my side.

"Why didn't you leave with Lumine, jade?" I asked them.

"I understand her, but I don't think the entire fall of Khaenri'ah is your fault. And I don't think you're a bad person, so you must be doing this for a good reason," Jade smiled.

"No, I'm doing this for a selfish reason. The gods of Celestia promised me, that if I take down the abyss, they would return Y/n to me," Dainseif said with a sad and bitter look on his face," I was foolish to accept, but I now know better to anger the gods."

"You must really love this Y/n. That so sweet," Jade smiled warmly.

"I think they would have agreed with you, but it's unlikely they would actually return them to me," I explained.

"Well, it wouldn't be godly of them if they don't uphold their own promise right?" Jade asked.

"I suppose, but who can say," I said as a sigh escaped my lips." I really do hope Y/n is waiting for me at the end of this journey."

"So it's off to mondstadt right?" Jade asked with an excited smile on their face.

"Yes,"

----------------

In mondstadt we met a very odd but familiar-looking traveler, he looked very similar to Lumine, but with longer hair and different clothing. With him a floating child accompanied him, they seemed to be interested in Mr.Dainsleif. Soon they accompanied us on the hunt for the abyss herald. Soon we found ourselves in wolvendom

"Stay here Jade, I'm going to look around for further clues. If danger comes around, just find me, or run to safety and I'll come and find you," Dainsleif said gently to me.

"Alright, be careful," I said with slight worry on my face.

Dainsleif nodded as he patted my head softly. As I waited for his return My mind tried to dig further into my hazier memories. She remembers running with someone pulling her past the destruction of Khaenri'ah. Yet I was pulled from my thoughts when the traveler and Paimon shortly arrived.

"Oh, where did Dain go?" Paimon asked.

"He went to investigate the area further," I answered." He'll be back soon."

" O-oh alright. Hey, Jade right? So how long have you been traveling with Dain?" Piamon asked.

"For as long as I can remember," I answered simply.

"What is Dain like, if I may ask?" aether asked.

"Well. When I first met him, he was quiet and hard to talk to since he mostly kept to himself," I said, as I thought back. " Though Know he is very caring in his own way, and he is very lonely behind his stoic face."

"Lonely? W-what makes you say that?" Paimon asked.

"Well, a long time ago he lost his lover. And at times, I think he projects them onto me," I said slowly.

"What do you mean?" Aether asked.

"Sometimes when he is in time of sorrow, he would hug and hold me close, and whisper sweet things to me, but the name he calls is Y/n," I said sadly." The next day he would ask me to forget about it."

"Wha that so sad, Paimon feels sorry for him," Painmon frowns.

"What about you? Why do you travel with him?" Aether asked.

"At first I simply followed in hopes to learn about myself, and why I am this way along my journey with Dainsleif. Maybe learn what I have forgotten, but know I follow Dainsleif to keep him company. I can learn about my origins after Dain finishes his journey." I smiled.

But before we could continue our conversation, abyss mages and hilicurls appeared. They surrounded us as they slowly closed in on us. Aether readied his sword, as I unsheathed my sword as well.

The fight was tough, I got scrapped and chipped along the way but we managed. It of now was an ice shard flew past and cracked a good chunk of my face. Half of my face was broken off, but thankfully traveler made quick work of the monster.

"Ahh! Jade are you okay?!" Paimon gasped.

"I'm fine, thou could you help look for my face?" I asked.

"Jade!" Dainsleif called out.

I slowly and nervously turned to face Dain. As I slowly opened my one eye and saw the sadness and worry in his eyes.

" What happened? I thought I told you to run away at the first sign of danger," Dainsleif said as he cupped my cheek and held me close.

" We were surrounded, there was no choice but to fight," I said to him.

"You need to be careful, you're too fragile," Dainsleif sighed as his fingers traced the cracks on my face. As I stared I could see he wasn't seeing me.

"I'm fine, I just need the left side of my face," I said as I looked away.

"Y/- Jade, please be careful," Dain stuttered as he looked away bashfully," I'm sorry."

--------

Soon the two groups parted ways as Aether and Paimon watched them leave.

"Wow, Dain must really miss this Y/n person if he mistakes two different people," Paimon sighed sadly.

"Something tells me there destiny and journey are more intertwined then they relieaze," Aether said veguly.

"What makes you say that?" Paimon asked.

"Aether is not wrong about that," Venti said as he suddenly appeared.

"AHHH! Tone deaf bard what are you doing here?!" Paimon gasped.

"I was around dragon spire for awhile. Those two have such a tragic story," Venti frowned sadly.

"What do you mean?" Paimon asked

"The princess the knight searches for has always been by his side, and the companion made of beautiful jade's answer had always been beside them," Venti said sadly as he strumd his lyre.

[violetnotez]

d r a m a t u r g y

Itadori x reader | Jujutsu Kaisen

⤷ Genre: Fluff

⤷ Word Count: 1072

⤷ Warnings: maybe cursing???? maybeeeeeeeeeee idk its been awhile 😂

⤷ Author’s Note: Ahhh my first Jujutsu Kaisen fic! Im honestly kinda scared to write for a new fandom, but hey ya only live once! Immediately after watching Jujutsu I swear to god I feel for Itadori faster than any anime boy in my entire life- so it is safe to say Yuuji is my new husbando 😛

⤷ Song Recs: “Youth-Dabin”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧ ✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: 

“Yuuji, you almost done yet?” you sighed, your body dangled across your boyfriend's bed, head so low your scalp was almost touching the floor.

You knew you sounded desperate, your voice taking on a whiny tone-not too far off from a child impatiently waiting to get a treat. 

You grimaced internally at the way your tone of voice, frustration riddling in your body at your situation.

One kiss- one measily peck on the lips….thats really all you wanted...and this man had the audacity to deny it to you.

Yuuji chuckled, the sound warm like honey as it dribbled from his mouth.

“Aw cmon, babe, you really miss me that much?”

You sighed exasperatedly, your voice full of yearning as you yawned out a “yes”, your mouth forming a pout as Yuuji chuckled once again to himself at your clinginess.

Something about Itadori Yuuji drove you wild inside….the way he touched you was so intoxicating that you felt your lungs stop in the most blissful ways. He always took your breath away, palms trailing against every expanse of skin, the intoxicating smell of his cologne mixed with his detergent making a scent that made your brain fuzzy and body more desperate to mold into his. 

Yuuji was never a serious lover, always giggling or cracking jokes, constantly praising you with his kind words and beautiful sounds. He was such a ball of warmth, melting into you and making your whole body feel completely bathed in comfort and heat.

So why would he deny you that bliss?

You exhaled again, a prickling sensation filling your stomach as you stared at your boyfriend. He was working so calmly and diligently on his homework, unknowing to how  your mind was racing as you imagined his hand on your body, the way his lips ghosted on your skin…

You heard him clear his throat, the sound breaking your lonely day dream. You swiveled yourself up from your upside down position, watching carefully as his writing hand slightly stalled against his paper.

He slowly turned to look at you, his frosted pink hair cascading over shy, choclate brown eyes.

“Why-why not come here and sit?” He smiled weakly, “ Im almost finished, it shouldn't take too long-”

You could hear that tell tale sign of nervousness in Yuuji’s voice-you had been dating him for 6 months now, and had known him for even longer as being best friends for many years. 

But the poor guy was always, always seemingly a nervous wreck when he initiated physical affection- and it honestly was the most adorable thing ever to you. They way he’d try to crack jokes to make it more lighthearted, or how his cheeks reddened from just being so close to you, made you just fall for him even more. It also didn't hurt that poor Itadori was quite bad at hiding his true emotions, even his smallest white lies so easy to read it was almost comical.

So you knew without a doubt Yuuji was practically dying inside from offering his lap to you- but God could he be any more adorable though...

You grinned devilishly as that statement echoed in the room, now a mantra replaying in your mind.

Finally, finally some desperately needed, selfish attention.

You scrambled off his bed, making the short distance to his chair and plopping yourself in his waiting lap, legs bending against his outer thighs and hands wrapping against his neck.

It felt like bliss- you melted your body into his, succumbing to that intoxicating scent, snuggling your face into the crook of his neck.

You felt Itadori chuckle, the vibration tickling your cheeks as you grazed his exposed skin.

“I dont think Ive ever seen you run over to me that quickly, babe-Maybe I should do that more often-”

That small joke made you feel even more possessive over your boyfriend, your hands  wrapping deeper against his skin to soak up as much warmth as you could.

“Don't be getting any ideas,” you scolded playfully, your voice muffled from being so close to him, “ or Ill take away your cuddling privileges,”

Yuuji laughed again at your weak threat, his digits trailing against your scalp and dancing against the soft skin behind your ear

“Like you could really stick to that, “ he smiled, “youd give up on the first day,”

You scrunched your nose at the jab, bringing yourself to look at Yuuji.

The freaking punk- you could already hear the smirk in his voice, but it was even worse when you looked at him. This man looked like a smug puppy, always desperately wanting attention and flaunting it when he got it. It was written all over his face that he was loving how needy you were for him.

You pursed your lips to the side, your eyes squinting slightly at your smug boyfriend.

“And youd be begging me in the first hour”, you retorted back, trying your best to look stern.

It was so hard to do that with Itadori though- he was just so damn comforting you couldnt help but just want to smile and drown him with all your affection.

Yuuji’s smile slowly dwindled to a dreamy grin, his eyes softer as he reached out for your face, cradling your cheeks against his hand. That faint smell of cologne lingered in the air, the scent even stronger now. You closed your eyes, your body riddled with a tingling sensation as you sucked in that intoxicating smell.

“Oh really,” he taunted back with a soft smile, “Id be begging?”

Shit-you creaked your eyes open ever so gently, kicking yourself internally for being so obvious.

He knew exactly what he was doing- Yuuji sometimes forgot how charming he could truly be, but when he remembered- it was game over for you. You could barely think straight, only able to focus on him and his touch.

Yuuji placed a kiss on top of your forehead, the sensation sending an explosion of fire works across your whole body, the spot almost ticklish.

You couldn’t even deny him-he was your whole world, and you'd go crazy if you weren't with him.

“Its okay though,” he smiled, his voice soft as his thumb brushed against your cheek.

“Id go a little crazy without you too.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧ ✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ:

Masterlist   |    Tip Jar    | Requests Open for Jujutsu Kaisen + Haikyuu! 

12/16/20

[gojoscloset]

Blame.

GETO SUGURU X READER ANGST/FLUFF

Warnings: Bad words

Shitty writing /unedited

Pt. 3 / 4

(Please read A/N at the end, I’m sorry )^: )

❣️❌❣️❌❣️❌❣️❌❣️❌❣️❌❣️❌❣️❌❣️

Geto’s senses were overstimulated at the sight of you.

He was overwhelmed with what felt like a rush of warm colors; it was enough to form Goosebumps on his skin.

The sound of your voice made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up straight.

Your voice was music to his ears, like each word that slipped from your mouth was honeyed and he desperately needed a taste.

Geto immediately recalled the nights he watched the videos he had saved, ones that had your voice in them and how would replay them over and over again until it almost became an obsession. But those nights were nothing compared to how your voice made him feel now.

He could smell your perfume. The perfume.

One he had gifted you many moons ago, one that drove him wild, and he insisted you wear for him whenever the two of you went out on dates, And you did, because you weren’t one to deny him of anything he asked for.

Knowing that you took the time to put it on gave Geto Hope. Hope that maybe just maybe he still crossed your mind like you crossed his.

But it was when his eyes met yours that did it for him. The pseudo smile he carried wavered instantaneously. He repeated your name with trembling lips and averted his gaze, but quickly brought it back to meet yours. He had been deprived of your entire being and didn’t want to deny himself of what he'd been craving for weeks, yet his demons yelled in his ear to look away. He felt undeserving being in your presence.

It was evident you utilized your time away from him properly, it showed in the way you carried yourself. Fear struck his heart with realization that all he did while you were away was sulk while you worked on yourself.

He began to have doubts about whether or not you would come back to him if he hadn’t worked on himself as much as he should.

“Suguru…” you whispered and reached over to gently take his hand in yours, he immediately laced your fingers with his.

The kind gesture that was meant to soothe the pain only made him cry more. “I think I’m ready to talk…” you whispered softly, looking at his torn expression tugged on your heart strings. “Let’s go to the apartment, yeah?” You suggested since it seemed he wasn’t going to stop crying anytime soon.

—

The walk to the apartment was silent,with the exception of occasional sniffles and the sounds of you taking sips of your coffee. The silence was not uncomfortable, but it was unfamiliar.

Under better circumstances he would talk and tease you, but for now you two walked next to each other, like friends. There was a gap between the two of you, but it wasn’t vast, to you, But for Suguru it felt like it was a mile wide.

It wasn’t until you entered the apartment that the uneasiness hit you. Everything was eerily untouched, exactly how you left it, almost to the T.

The sweater you wore that same day still on the couch sprawled over the armrest. Your house slippers in the same position, you tried sneaking a glance into the room you two once shared, but the door was closed.

Your mind couldn’t help but wonder if the drawers were left open and if things were still scattered across the floor.

“Sorry..about the mess.” He spoke quietly and took a seat at the dining room table, you sat across from him, giving him a smile.

“Don’t worry about it.” Again there was a silence between the two of you, not uncomfortable, but unfamiliar.

“Do you need a moment, Suguru?”

“No.” His voice cracked.

“Okay...Uh… hmmm...Where do I begin?” You looked around the room while you organized your thoughts.

“I do have a lot to say, I hope I was not interrupting anything….”

He quickly shook his head giving you the floor.

“Then Please allow me to tell you how I feel… about everything” you cleared your throat and he nodded, listening closely, tears having stopped but heart was understandably extremely sensitive.

“Being away from you made me realize a lot Of things, A lot of things, Suguru. First and foremost being how much I love you. But I also realized I love myself more, which is why-“

“Please don’t leave me…” he interrupted softly before you could continue. “I know I have been selfish and it is becoming a commodity in the relationship and I don’t mean to interrupt you and don’t expect for you to change your mind, but in case you do leave me I just want to tell you how much you mean to me and how much I need you.”

You swallowed the lump forming in your throat, the ‘tough cookie’ exterior you put on when you approached him quickly crumbling the more he spoke.

You weren’t going to leave him, that was the last thing on your mind,you wanted to give him a piece of your mind before continuing to live the life you two created together.

“Being encased in a home we built together is karma I put on myself. I miss you. I miss everything about you. Everything” he emphasized with hand gestures.

“Your smile. The way you smell. The way you call my name. The cadence in your voice, your walk, your talk, sometimes I would go out and someone laughed like you and I-...I ...“ he choked out a sob and buried his face in his hands.

“I’m not leaving you Suguru…” The two of you locked eyes with each other, there was hope in his eyes.

“I just wanted to tell you how much that shit sucks. Being accused of infidelity when I gave you as much of me and my love as I possibly could, but even so…” you wiped the tears from your eyes, Geto was hit with deja vu, recalling the scene the day you left and how he wished he could wipe the tears for you.

He was being given another chance at redemption and he gladly took it.

He stood up from his seat, making his way to you, he knelt down beside you and wiped the tears away, as he should have the first time.

“I’m so sorry… I love you more than I could ever put into words y/n. What I said was out of insecurity. This doesn’t justify my actions or what I said, but my words came from a place of insecurity and fear. I was afraid you would go to Gojo because he literally has everything you could ever want…”

“You ARE everything I want so stop saying that!” you quickly interjected before he spiraled into a self deprecating headspace.

His hands laced with yours and he dropped his head. You could almost physically feel the doubts that had been eating at him disappear with those 9 words.

“I love you..so so much…” he sobbed quietly whilst lacing your fingers together. He brought your knuckles to his lips placing multiple kisses on them.

“And I love you so so much” you whispered, cupping his face in your free hand, wiping away his tears.

The rest of the night consisted of non stop chattering and laughter. Tears were shed and stories exchanged about how the two of you felt away from each other.

Boundaries were reset and apologies were made, a new chapter in your relationship was written that night, and as long as the pages are written with love, the story will go on forever and ever.

—-

🤠 howdy! It’s me again! Ahh I apologize for this chapter, I was in the middle of writing it when the snowstorm hit (I live in shithead Texas) and pretty much my whole life went to shit momentarily.

But thankfully things finally went back to normal ..kinda (after 2+ fucking weeks of no water) the damages are fixed and stuff but guess who is now $2k+ in debt

That’s right! Yours truly!

LMAOO hate it here

Y’all don’t invest in a home in America unless the area is good. And please check the foundation because wow. I hate it here sometimes.

Anyway, again I do apologize for such a shitty written chapter, but expect a part 4 (the final chapter) and also hopefully with a lot better writing. Like I’m literally so so so sorry I feel like it’s so anticlimactic but I got y’all, don’t worry. Ahhh again sorry if it’s anti climatic as fuck

I wanted to put something out for y’all so bad )^:

Anywho

Please anticipate my next works and also a master list and finalizing my blog theme

Finally lololol.

Thank you

I love you

Neptilian ✨