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j4gm · 4 years ago

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TOGETHER AGAIN SPOILERS

A thread of lore, Easter eggs, episode connections, and background details from Adventure Time: Distant Lands: Together Again! Let me know if I missed anything! This is adapted from my original Twitter thread.

Keep reading ��️⬇️⬇️

1. I was expecting them to perhaps do a classic style title sequence for this episode, but I wasn't expecting them to straight up use the original title sequence. The only difference is this final screen saying "Distant Lands".

2. The background of the title cards is also the hill from the title sequence.

3. The ice cream having "50 flavours" and having an image of an enlightened soul is an obvious reference to the 50th Dead World as we see it later in the episode.

4. Continuing with the metaphor, the dirt in the ice cream could be a parallel to the fact that Jake's Nirvana actually wasn't perfect, because his inaction was allowing for injustice to perpetuate.

5. This whole scene feels immediately slightly off. Finn has his Scarlet sword and is out on a classic Ice King adventure, but he speaks in his grown voice and all the slang feels much more forced than it did in the real season one. Turns out this was deliberate.

6. The snow golem speaks with a baby voice like it did in the pilot episode, even though in canon it has a deeper voice. This further hints that something is not quite right.

7. The first major break in continuity is these snow golems resembling Uncle Gumbald and Peace Master, who Finn didn't meet until later in his life.

8. LSP sitting on Finn's head like this is reminiscent of Pen Ward's piece for the 2018 Ble crew zine.

9. Finn being given the choice of helping somebody but ending up helping everybody reminds me of "Memories of Boom Boom Mountain". It's the kind of resolution that wouldn't happen so much in the late seasons of the show, which helps make this scene feel even further out of place.

10. Jake is half frozen by Ice King in pretty much the exact same way as he was in "Prisoners of Love", and even has a very similar line.

11. The Snail is seen here. The crew have said that the Snail has been deliberately left out of previous Distant Lands specials, so its placement here is another very deliberate hint that this whole sequence is "trying too hard" to be like the early seasons.

12. The book "Mind Games" appears a couple of times, as seen in several previous episodes of Adventure Time. The first is as Finn is approaching the library in his dream. It also appears as one of the items in Finn's backpack later.

13. Jake is hurt when Finn fist bumps him with his metal arm, revealing that this scene is not real. This is also a callback to the title sequences of "Islands" and "Elements".

14. A whole bunch of familiar skeletons are seen in the bird's nest: Dirt Beer Guy, Abracadaniel, Me-Mow, Lemongrab, Mr. Pig, and the Snail again. This doesn't necessarily mean that all these characters are dead, since this scene is just a hallucination.

15. Old Man Finn! He's still got the chest tattoo of Jake, and this time we know that Jake is dead, so the theory that Jake died before "Obsidian" seems pretty likely. He looks similar to his old man design from "Puhoy", with the same facial hair.

16. There are several cameos of familiar characters who apparently died at the same time as Finn. The first is this duck, who previously appeared in "Ocarina".

17. The second is Donny, from the episode... uh, "Donny".

18. This goblin guy is an unnamed background character from “The Silent King”.

19. This old lady first appeared in "The Enchiridion", way back in season one. Old ladies are a species in the Land of Ooo, so I guess she wasn't actually very old back then, given she just about outlived Finn.

20. This is the cobbler who first appears in "His Hero". Amazing that he lived so long given all the trouble he got into in that episode.

21. Land of the Dead! This place was first seen in season two's "Death in Bloom", and now we are finally learning its actual purpose. It's a sort of gateway and hub to all of the other dead worlds.

22. There are some more minor cameos at the gates: a house person from "Donny", a soft person from "Gut Grinder", and a wood person from "When Wedding Bells Thaw". And, of course, the gate guardian himself from “Death in Bloom”.

23. Finn completely ignores the gate guardian in the same way he did in Death in Bloom. This also has the convenient effect of not having to reveal how Finn died, leaving it up to the audience's imagination.

24. Mr. Fox! We already knew he would die at some point because BMO had his skull in the finale.

25. Finn has his design from the first Distant Lands poster in this scene. Turns out it's young Finn in old Finn's clothes. But they gave him a shirt in the poster so you wouldn't be able to see the tattoo.

26. The clapping that Finn does while he's looking for Jake is a callback to "James Baxter the Horse", when Jake tells Finn to listen for that same rhythm if they are killed and need to find each other in the afterlife.

27. Mr. Fox talks about a "past life quotient", suggesting that there might be some kind of limit to how many times somebody can reincarnate. Finn's reincarnations are also seen in this scene; a callback to "The Vault", and confirmation that reincarnations share the same soul.

28. Boobafina, the goose who Mr. Fox was in love with in his debut episode “Storytelling”, apparently reincarnated into a tugboat. We've already seen that objects can have souls in the episode "Ghost Fly".

29. Finn is initially assigned to the 37th Dead World, which is the same one that Jake went to when he died in "Sons of Mars". We can only guess at what the other numbers on the ticket mean ;)

30. Tiffany! Despite several lucky escapes throughout his life, Tiffany has finally died. I like the use of this imagery to express Finn's conflicted feelings about him.

31. The 50th Dead World has long been established as the "highest" dead world, and the one synonymous with Heaven within Adventure Time's universe. It was first mentioned in "Ghost Princess" back in season three.

32. It's unclear what happens to souls which are destroyed within the dead worlds. It is a similar question to asking what happened to the ghosts that were killed in "Ghost Fly".

33. Death doesn't speak at all in Together Again because his voice actor, Miguel Ferrer, passed away in 2017 long before production began.

34. Finn phases through New Death when he tries to attack him, just like what happened way back in "Death in Bloom".

35. The 30th Dead World contains Tree Trunks as well as many of her love interests; Mr. Pig, her alien husband from "High Strangeness", Danny and Randy who first appeared in "Apple Wedding", and several more who we don't recognise, including at least one who presents as a woman.

36. Literally yelled when these two showed up. Joshua calls Finn a crybaby, which is a callback to "Dad's Dungeon".

37. The wall of weapons in Joshua and Margaret's house includes the iconic Demon Blood Sword, which was broken in "Play Date", as well as Margaret's auto-loading crossbow from "Joshua & Margaret Investigations".

38. Jermaine is sidelined a few times through the episode, in reference to his attitude in "Jermaine" where he feels that Finn and Jake were always their parents' favourites. I would have hoped things would be a bit better by now.

39. Fern gets name dropped while Finn and Jake are reuniting. A shame he doesn't actually show up in the episode.

40. In this scene, Finn says "What time is it?" This is a very subtle reference to the 2010 cartoon "Adventure Time".

41. In a couple of shots during this fight scene it looks like Jake might have a tattoo. It seems like it only becomes visible when he stretches out his arm.

42. New Death's amulet in this scene resembles parts of the Lich's cape, foreshadowing his influence on New Death.

43. There are several more cameos in the 50th Dead World: Booshy from "High Strangeness", one of the Marshmallow Kids from "Scamps", and Ghost Princess and Clarence, who were seen ascending to the 50th Dead World in "Ghost Princess".

44. Finn didn't interact with Booshy in "High Strangeness", but it seems they must have met at some point before they both died because Finn knows his name.

45. It seems like people in the 1st Dead World are slowly melted away until they become part of the landscape. Nasty.

46. Lots more cameos in this scene: a gnome from "Power Animal", a gnome from "The Enchiridion", a Bath Boy from "The Vault", Blagertha from "Love Games", Maja the Sky Witch, a troll from "Dungeon", Chocoberry, Choose Goose, Wyatt, a spiky person from "Gut Grinder", and possibly more.

47. Tiffany's insults are consistently nonsensical and amazing, as they were in the original series.

48. The Candy Kingdom looks extremely different. Peppermint Butler is wearing the crown so he might be in charge now, which is supported by the kingdom's very magical-looking augmentations. It’s not clear whether Finn and Jake were expecting to find Princess Bubblegum or Peppermint Butler, since both have the initials “PB” and both could be going by the title of “Princess”. Perhaps Peps and Bubblegum share the princess duties now that PB is living with Marceline more of the time.

49. Peppermint Butler has a "Boss" mug, although it's not the same colour as the one from "Obsidian".

50. Jake's ghost has the same design as he did when BMO killed him in "Ghost Fly". I also absolutely love Finn's ghost. This scene establishes that ghosts are just visitors to the mortal plane from the dead worlds.

51. Life has only appeared in animated shorts before now. Namely, "The Gift That Reaps Giving" which establishes her relationship with Death, and "Frog Seasons: Winter". This episode gives her a concrete place within Adventure Time's pantheon: she is in charge of reincarnation.

52. A translation of Life’s angry French dialogue by Shado: “After all I did for that boy. After all I did for him. No, it's not possible. It's not possible no, that... that makes me so mad but it's not possible.”

53. We finally have in-universe confirmation that Shoko's tiger is a previous life of Jake. This was previously confirmed by one of the writers, but wasn't canon until now.

54. I feel like Finn pulled off Shoko's look even better than Shoko did. I wonder whether Finn has gained the memories of his past lives now that he’s dead.

55. No Easter egg here, just want to appreciate this image.

56. There is an elemental symbol on the wall here, as seen in "Jelly Beans Have Power".

57. Tiffany's dramatic internal monologue is a recurring gag, as is his habit of nearly dying from falling into holes.

58. The Jake suit makes a cameo in the fight against New Death. It was last seen in the episode "Reboot”.

59. Finn's backpack contains a few familiar items: the t-shirt with the pocket from "It Came from the Nightosphere", Finn's underwear from "Little Dude" and other episodes, and a copy of Mind Games as I've already mentioned.

60. The Lich's Hand is present in the background of Death's... death scene. This is probably the unseen "friend" who New Death keeps talking about.

61. The Lich's menacing monologues often begin with a single command. Previously they have included "Fall" and "Stop". This time, the command is "Burn".

62. Jake uses the word "boingloings", which is a callback all the way to "Hitman" in the third season.

63. Jake's blue shape-shifter form from "Abstract" appears very briefly during his fight with Finn.

64. Finn's lumpy space person form also makes an appearance. This design was last seen all the way back in the second episode of the entire show, "Trouble in Lumpy Space".

65. Jake steps on the Lich's hand in a very similar way to how he stepped on Ash in "Memory of a Memory", which is itself a Monty Python reference.

66. The credits include a dedication to a few AT cast and crew who have passed away. Polly Lou Livingston was the voice of Tree Trunks. Miguel Ferrer was the voice of Death. Michel Lyman and Maureen Mlynarczyk were both sheet timers on the original series. Rest in peace.

67. The message that Finn and Jake write out on the ouija board is "BUTT", which Peppermint Butler takes as a distress signal. This message is also used as a distress signal by the Hot Dog Knights in "The Limit".

68. Peppermint Butler's reversed dialogue from the scene where he makes contact with Finn and Jake is "Kee-Oth Rama Pancake", the spell from “Dad's Dungeon” for banishing demons.

69. That appears to be President Porpoise with all of Tree Trunks’ other lovers.

70. In this scene, Life is humming part of "Lonely Bones", the song which Death tried to record for her in her debut short "The Gift That Reaps Giving". It's hard to notice because it's so brief.

71. Finn and Jake's cover is blown while in the Land of the Dead because Jake loudly farts, which also happened in "Death in Bloom".

72. The place where Mr. Fox explains the perception mechanics of the afterlife is the exact same location as the River of Forgetfulness from "Death in Bloom", which, as it turns out, was imaginary.

These are sort of out of order at the end because I was adding stuff to the Twitter thread as it got discovered. That’s all for now!

#adventure time #together again #finn the human #jake the dog #lorepost

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thebrownssociety · 4 years ago

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Looney Tunes Headcanons - Off-Set, Part 2

This is a bunch of headcanons about what I think some of the LT’s are known for being like outside of the WB bubble. As there are a lot of them, it’ll be uploaded in stages.

References to homosexuality.

Porky Pig is well-known for being the off-screen face of Looney Tunes. Because Bugs and Daffy have a lot of filming commitments it’s Porky who attends Toon-town related things on behalf on the Looney Tunes.

He’s judged fashion shows, cooking shows, car-races [Toon Town has a lot of car races. They have a lot of different terrains which provide a wide variety.] and Variety Shows. Unfortunately he’s also had to uncover various episodes of cheating during these competitions. [No, you C-C-CAN’T take a magic potion which g-gives you a p-p-perfect voice in a sin-sin-sing - vocalising competition!]

Porky is also known for being one half of the original Looney Tune Power Couple. Him and Petunia have been together forever and during that time, although they have had disagreements they’ve never been that serious. They split up once in the late 40′s and that was due to [unfounded] rumours about Petunia dating Elmer Fudd. [Of all toons!] They laugh about it today, but at the time it was rather difficult.

He’s also the one who sticks up for the other looney tunes, major or minor ones, and in the olden days was well-known for challenging the producers the most. There was one famous incident in about the 70′s when Rocky and Mugsy were accused of having committed a series of well-known burglaries. Even when the rest of the LT’s were convinced they’d done it, it was Porky who was saying ‘Just because they’re t-t-thieves doesn’t m-m-mean they did this crime!’ Unfortunately it turned out Rocky and Mugsy HAD done it, but the thought was there.

Five opinions he’s well known for having:

1 - Just because we act a certain way on screen doesn’t mean we have to act that way off-screen. [That being said, he doesn’t get drawn into arguments about what a toon is doing off-set. Reporter: ‘Pepe Le Pew has taken up cooking! Do you think it’s wise having a skunk in the kitchen?’ Porky: ‘A-a-as long as he can do it without b-bur-burn - destroying the place, I don’t care!’]

2 - Every toon deserves an education. [Porky is also off the firm opinion that there is no such thing as a ‘stupid’ toon, or one who is completely incapable of learning at least the basics of education. This opinion has been tested on many occasions but he still has it.]

3 - Petunia is amazing, fantastic, awesome, brilliant and the love of my life. Did I mention she’s amazing?

4 - Everyone should go abroad. Porky loves travelling and has a wall covered in pictures of places where he’s been. He also likes buying hats from the countries [in a reference to his first short ‘I haven’t got a hat.’ now he has just shy of one for every day of the year.]

5 - Just because a toon isn’t working anymore doesn’t mean they aren’t a toon. To this day Porky is still in touch with Beans, Bosko, Honey, Oliver Owl, Foxy and Roxy and supports their endeavours. [Namely, Bosko and Honey’s restaurant, Oliver's mechanics, Beans chimney sweeping and Foxy and Roxy’s low-key acting gigs.]

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Elmer Fudd is known for a variety of things. In the olden days it was his extremely good acting skills, reserved - but not shy - personality and his debated relationship with Petunia Pig. [There was never any romance between them, just very good friendship and a deep level of understanding of one another.] Once Porky and Petunia got engaged he was an ‘established bachelor’ [despite being less than 21 at the time, it was more the fact he showed absolutely no inclination towards a romantic relationship with anyone that put him in that category.]

When he was 24 [1959] it came out that Bugs loved Elmer. Elmer admitted he felt the same way and a relationship started. [Details of this can be found in my ‘Unsolicited’ Fanfiction.] It was quite an unusual relationship due to the fact they didn’t live together, didn’t spend a lot of time together [mainly due to a mix of filming commitments] and didn’t go out of their way to show affection publicly.

They got engaged in 1982, then married in 1992. Both events were well-publicised in Toon Town.

Aside from his relationship with Bugs, he’s known for surprising everyone by proving to be very smart when the toons were allowed to access proper education. As well as a teaching degree, he’s got a degree in Law. [Much to everyone’s surprise.] It only took him a decade to get up to an High School level of education, and he passed with flying coulors. [Despite a snooty human-teachers best efforts]

Five opinions he’s well known for having:

1 - Daffy Duck is not an idiot and is actually very clever. Elmer has been of this opinion since he first met Daffy and despite multiple instances when Daffy has acted like the dictionary definition of a complete and utter nimrod, he’s been unwavering in this belief. Thankfully when the toons got access to education Daffy proved Elmer right and gained a degree in Performing Arts.

2 - Opera is brilliant. Elmer loves all kind of music [excluding heavy metal and some raunchier pop songs.] but opera will always remain his favourite. It’s one of the many things that bonded Elmer and Bugs. Elmer’s favourite song is ‘I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General’ but his favourite musical is ‘The Phantom Of The Opera.’

3 - No one is a complete idiot and everyone should be encouraged to learn. Due to his own experiences of being treated like a complete imbecile by pretty much everyone - even Bugs has been known to do this on a few occasions - he does his best to be nice to those who are also utter idiots and encourage them. Unfortunately, like Porky, this approach has been tested to breaking point. Two words: Pete Puma.

4 - In the same vein, Books are brilliant. Elmer is a massive fan of reading and reads a wide variety of stuff. He reads non-fiction on a range of subjects [Cooking to real-life crime] and he also reads fiction again, over a variety of genres. [Crime, Romance, historical fiction, children's books, the works.] Elmer normally aims to read for at least 30 minutes twice a week. It used to be more, but parenting, filming and The Looniversity have restricted the time he can devote to it by quite a margin.

5 - Everyone should be given three chances. Elmer does his best not to judge someone when he first meets them, especially if they’re acting like a bit of an asteroid. The second time he forms a bit more of an opinion, but normally keeps quiet about it [except to Bugs, Daffy and Porky.]. Third time he meets you he’s got a good idea of what you’re like and how others are reacting to you. Then he decides whether or not he wants to be around you. Once he’s made up his mind it’s very hard to change it.

The main exceptions to this rule have been the Tiny Toons. Seeing as they’re literally little version of Elmer’s family [and he’s parenting three of them, namely Elmyra, Buster + Babs] he’s cut them a lot of slack.

#looney tunes headcanons #porky pig #elmer fudd #bugs bunny #daffy duck #tiny toons #elmyra duff #buster bunny #babs bunny #rocky and mugsy #these are headcanons only #pete puma #long post

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grailfinders · 5 years ago

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Fate and Phantasms #40: Hassan of the Cursed Arm

Today on Fate and Phantasms, we’re building one of the old men of the mountain and king of “he’s a really nice guy despite every aspect of his appearance”, Hassan of the Cursed Arm. Surprisingly, Hassan is not a rogue, but a monk/warlock mix thanks to the titular arm.

Originally, this build gave you a weapon with reach to act as your cursed arm, but that puts a lot of strain on a character that already needs multiple stats to work properly. I still think slapping someone from across the room is funny though, so I’m including both the original and variant build in the spreadsheet. I’ll also bring up the differences in the level-by-level breakdown below the cut when they come up.

(EDIT: This one required a bit of fixing up, but I’m too lazy to completely rewrite everything. This has less to do with Tasha’s and more to do with me suddenly remembering whips exist and don’t have the Special tag. Just focus on dexterity, and you’re good.)

Race and Background

Despite his looks, Hassan is a Human, giving him +1 to all abilities. He’s also an Acolyte, a much nicer and less accurate title than his real one “Cult Leader”. This gives him proficiency with Insight and Religion. He also gets the Shelter of the Faithful feature, meaning he can perform religious rites and receive free healing and care at temples related to his god. This makes sense, considering you’re the second highest rank in the cult, and the first highest only shows up to kill you.

Stats

Your Dexterity is your best stat, you’re nimble and really good with throwing daggers. Everyone you’ve met generally agrees you’re a pretty nice guy, probably because of your high Charisma. You’re a major religious figure, so your Wisdom is pretty high. You also lead a bunch of assassins, and if you couldn’t tell when they show up to meet with you that would be pretty embarrassing. We’re not dumping Constitution, because we’re not masochists, which means our last stat is Intelligence. You learned enough to summon and forcibly amputate a demon, and that’s all the schooling you needed. Finally, dump Strength. You’re pretty wiry, but we just don’t need it for this build.

Class Levels

1. Monk 1: As a monk, you get proficiency in Acrobatics, Stealth, and Strength and Dexterity Saves. For a religious figure, you lead a pretty active lifestyle.

First level monks get Unarmored Defense, meaning your AC is equal to 10 plus your dex mod plus your wis mod. You also learn Martial Arts, letting you use your martial arts die in place of your normal damage for unarmed attacks and attacks with monk weapons, as well as use dexterity for those attacks. You can also use your bonus action to make an unarmed attack if you use your action to attack with a monk weapon.

Also important to note, your monk weapons can scale their damage with your Martial Arts, which will improve your throwing knives and cursed arm a bit.

2. Monk 2: At second level, you get a number of Ki points equal to your monk level. You regain spent ki points on short rests, and can use them to add options to your bonus action. Flurry of Blows lets you attack twice, Patient Defense lets you dodge, and Step of the Wind doubles your jump distance and lets you disengage or dash. You also get Unarmored Movement, adding 10′ to your movement when you aren’t wearing armor.

You can also make a Dedicated Weapon at the end of a short rest, turning any one weapon you choose into a monk weapon pretty much indefinitely. Spend a little quality time with your arm, get to know it.

3. Monk 3: At this level you can Deflect Missiles, reacting to reduce ranged attack damage. If the damage is reduce to 0, you can also spend 1 ki point to throw it back at an enemy.

At this level, you also become a Way of the Shadow monk. At this level you can spend 2 ki points to cast Darkness, Darkvision, Pass without Trace, or Silence without material components. You also gain Minor Illusion as a cantrip. Smashing out the lights with some throwing daggers also works, but a lot of creatures have darkvision naturally, so you’ll need something to fall back on.

4. Warlock 1: We’ve got the Hassan, but no Cursed Arm. It’s time we fixed that. We’re not sure why the demon you tore an arm from rewarded you with supernatural powers, but we’re not complaining. At first level, fiend warlocks get the Dark One’s Blessing, meaning you gain temporary hit points equal to your charisma modifier plus your warlock level when a hostile creature is reduced to 0 HP. You also learn some Pact Magic, limited spell slots you regain on short rests. You use charisma to cast spells. At this level that includes Mage Hand because you couldn’t reach far enough as is, Eldritch Blast as a magical stand-in for all those throwing knives, Hex to curse your enemies, and Expeditious Retreat to bolster your already impressive movement skills.

5: Warlock 2: Second level warlocks learn Eldritch Invocations, little ways your patron shows you they care. You get Devil’s Sight and Agonizing Blast, which grants you darkvision even in magical darkness and extra damage for your “throwing knives”. You can also cast Sense Emotion; assassination requires manipulation as much as murder.

6. Warlock 3: At third level you get your pact boon, specifically your Pact Weapon, any melee weapon that you want, though since this is supposed to be your arm you should keep it consistent. Whips are good, use that. You can unwrap your arm as an action, and counts as magical for resistance and immunity’s sake. You can also turn other magical weapons into your pact weapon if you really want, but again, this is supposed to be your arm. I know you’re already playing fast and loose with limb ownership, but there needs to be limits.

You also learn how to make a Shadow Blade, a finesse weapon that gives you advantage in the shade.

7. Warlock 4: Use your first ASI to become a Martial Adept, giving you one d6 to use two maneuvers from the battle master list. You regain the die on short rests. Your maneuvers are Evasive Footwork, which adds 1d6 to your AC while you’re moving, and Lunging Attack, which adds 1d6 and 5′ of reach to a single attack. Congrats, you can now slap someone from fifteen feet away.

At this level you learn the spell Cloud of Daggers, letting you set up very painful traps. You also learn how to cast the cantrip Poison Spray. Poison isn’t your gimmick, but it’s important to be flexible. Being flexible also isn’t your gimmick, but... you know what I mean.

8. Warlock 5: Fifth level warlocks don’t get any more features, but they do get another invocation: Improved Pact Weapon. When attacking with your pact weapon, add 1 to the attack and damage rolls. You can also use the weapon as a spellcasting focus. Honestly this invocation is so useful you may want to swap out an invocation for it at third level.

You can also cast the spell Gaseous Form, turning a willing creature into a cloud of smoke for up to an hour. The spell’s great for infiltration and is the closest thing you’ll have to a spirit form. You aren’t truly incorporeal, though: you only resist nonmagical damage.

9. Warlock 6: You have the Dark One’s Own Luck, and can add 1d10 to an ability check or save you make once per short rest. You can also cast Spider Climb at this level so you can sneak into a building without having to become a cloud.

10. Warlock 7: You get another invocation, Ghostly Gaze. This allows you to concentrate like you would a spell and see through objects up to 30′ away. This is especially powerful given a number of spells require line of sight to be used.

Shadow of Moil is not one of those spells, though. With this spell, you don a cloak of shadows, heavily obscuring yourself and dimming the light around you. You also retaliate to being attacked with tendrils of darkness.

11. Warlock 8: Use your next ASI to round out your Wisdom and Charisma for better spell saves and AC. If you’re using the variant build, round out your Constitution and Charisma instead.

Regardless, you also learn how to Summon Greater Demon. They’re still a bit miffed about the whole “ripping off their arm” thing, so you’ll have to convince it to work for you, otherwise it will turn on your party. You’ll need someone’s blood to do it, but that’s still much better than ripping off your own arm.

12. Monk 4: There’s still a couple things we want from the monk class, so lets take a break from demon summoning for a bit. At this level, you can Slow Fall, reducing falling damage by five times your monk level. Given the amount of climbing and flying you’ve been doing, you’ll definitely want this.

You also get another ASI. Bump up your Dexterity to improve the damage you can do with your pact weapon.

13. Monk 5: Fifth level monks get an Extra Attack, letting you make two attacks in a single attack action. You also have the ability to perform a Stunning Strike, spending 1 ki point to ruin your DM’s attempts at balancing encounters. Your martial arts die also become a d6, slightly increasing your power when you’re caught without a weapon. Which is never, so it’s not that useful.

14. Monk 6: Sixth level monks get Ki-empowered Strikes, making your unarmed strikes magical, just like your arm already is. You can also move an extra 5′ per round, and learn how to Shadow Step, spending an action to teleport from one area of dim or darker light to another, so long as it’s within 60′ and you can see it. (This is one of those things that’s a lot better with Ghostly Gaze.) After teleporting, you have advantage on your next melee attack, meaning you can pop into your target’s inner sanctum, snap their neck, and then pop out with any guards none the wiser.

15. Warlock 9: Your next invocation, Otherworldly Leap, lets you cast Jump at will for free. This is another good mobility option, as well as being a vital component to Posing Dramatically In The Moonlight, a mandatory part of being an assassin.

You can also cast Infernal Calling, which is kind of like Summon Greater Demon, but you don’t have to worry about the demon betraying you if you have its talisman. I’m pretty sure its arm counts for this purpose, but that’s up to your DM.

16. Warlock 10: Tenth level fiendlocks get Fiendish Resilience, giving you resistance to damage of one type from weapons that aren’t silvered or magical. You can swap your resistance types at the end of short rests. I’d recommend bludgeoning for a proper Protection from Wind.

17. Warlock 11: At eleventh level, warlocks get their first Mystic Arcanum. Your spell slots stay at fifth level, but you get a sixth level spell you can cast once per long rest.

This level, pick up Psychic Crush from Unearthed Arcana. There isn’t a spell that lets us grab a person’s heart, so we’ll have to settle for grabbing their brain.

18. Warlock 12: At this level you get your last ASI and last invocation. Bump up your Strength (or Charisma if you’re doing the variant build) and pick up the Eldritch Spear invocation to have a lot more range on your throwing knives.

19. Warlock 13: For your seventh level Mystic Arcanum, grab Finger of Death. You should have five of these already, but this lets you deal a lot of guaranteed damage to a creature. Just try not to get the final blow with this-explaining the zombie it makes would be a headache.

20. Warlock 14: Your final level gives you the ability to Hurl (creatures) Through Hell. After hitting a creature with an attack, you can send them on a guided tour through the lower planes until the end of your next turn. When they come back, they take 10d10 psychic damage if they’re not a native of those planes. You can only use this feature once per long rest. This and Psychic Crush are about as close to your Delusional Heartbeat as we can get. Neither can cause instant death, but let’s be honest it’s not like your NP does it that often either.

Pros: You’re very good at infiltration missions. You’re very fast, and have a bevy of mobility options available to you, from flight to climbing walls to straight up teleportation. You’re also tough to hit, with multiple ways of obscuring yourself from ranged fighters. You’re also able to perform hit and run tactics without using your bonus action thanks to your arm’s range, saving your disengaging actions for something else.

Cons: You have a low constitution, meaning that the rest of your build being melee focused isn’t the best idea. This also means you have bad concentration saves, which is bad if you’ve got a buff spell on you to escape, and worse if your concentration is keeping a demon in check. Like all warlocks, you also have the issue of limited spell slots, so most of the time you’ll be relying on just your throwing knives and invocations, without much of a safety net if things go wrong.

Your best abilities don’t have saves though, so if you stick to the shadows and avoid that guy whose arm you stole you should be fine.

Next up: MGS 3: Snake Eater

#fgo #fate grand order #hassan of the cursed arm #dnd 5e #Fate and Phantasms

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chidoroki · 5 years ago

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Head empty, pre-TPN season 2 thoughts only.

Normally I don’t even bother with hiding spoilers but since the new season is so close I’ll put everything below a cut (if tumblr cooperates) because I do want anime-onlys to enjoy the season with as little knowledge to what madness is about to happen as possible. This is just a bunch of notes that filled my head over the past couple days.. weeks? A long time.. and if I didn’t write them all down somewhere I wouldn’t stop thinking about them.. so if you understand this whole mess, then kudos to you.

So, here’s your post-season 1/ch37+ spoiler warning.

Demon language:

With Mujika and Sonju making their grand first appearances, I hope actually implement the demon language this time?

The only word spoken in the language in season 1 was the demon god’s name, which was just changed to “Him” (sub) or “The One” (dub), so ignoring it there was fine.

Granted, our demon friends don’t say much in their language during the upcoming arc, aside from this moment in ch48, but I can see the anime passing it off as a mere whisper between the two of them just so they don’t have to worry about it.

I don’t recall any of the GP poachers using the language though.. right? Pretty sure they don’t..

Anyways, all I’m saying is that they better figure something out by the Ayshe shows up way later in future seasons.

Episode count? 24?

Short answer: I don’t think so? Did once, but stuff happened. Anyways..

Season 1 ended in March 2019, which is also when we learned we were getting a second season and once we found later on that S2 was originally going to air in October 2020, I immediately thought we were getting about 24 eps.

I thought with all that time between seasons, 24 eps would be reasonable and that S2 would end at ch101. S1 managed to adapt 37 chapters, so 64 chapters in a season twice as long sound decent enough, right?

By the time we reach ch101, it would give us the demon forest, shelter B06-32, Goldy Pond and the short trip to Cuvitidala. (all of which would make this long wait for s2 sooo worth it btw.)

By this point we learn a bunch about the outside world, Norman being alive, what happened to Phil, and the demon bastard himself.

I bring up ch101 as a stopping point because it’s the last chapter before the two year time skip and.. I honestly can’t see them doing a time skip mid-season?

I mean, they could if they wanted to, I guess? Having everyone age up suddenly between episodes via a montage, a quick summary or even flashbacks of what we missed.. but maybe at the start of a season? Not in the middle.

Right now we know anime original scenes are going to be included into season 2 so I’m kinda hoping that once we do eventually reach the time skip we learn more about the search Emma’s group went on for T7W/golden water/temples.

I counted. If S2 does indeed get this many episodes, ep23 (or 22, if there’s a break in between somewhere or whatever) will land on my birthday and you can bet I’ll be beyond happy

HOWEVER! all the hope I once had about a 24ep season vanished due to the clusterfuck that was 2020. Thanks to the worldwide pandemic, many anime were put on hold and pushed back several months, with TPN airing this month rather than the original October date.

It was a bummer hearing about the delay at first but I never complained about it. I much rather have the studios prioritize their employee’s health over production.

Even if S2 did reach ch101, or even Goldy Pond, they would need to find a ton of new voice actors, and with how the world is working now.. eh, I have some doubts.

Cloverworks also has two other series airing this month aside from TPN so needless to say they’ll be a bit busy, especially if employees are still working from home, social distancing, or however they’re managing to produce these anime.

So, episode count.. 12?

The main reason I have a hard time grasping the idea of another 12ep season at all is because.. I don’t know where it’ll be a decent place for it to stop?

S1 ending at ch37 with the kids escaping? Perfect. You can’t question that decision. But now? When a whole bunch of craziness is about happen? How do you choose another perfect moment to end a season with?

No matter how many anime original scenes they have planned for the demon forest, I believe we’ll at least reach B06-32, which will get us to ch52.

Could they go farther? Sure. Perhaps ending at ch59-60? It would leave us off with Emma & Ray leaving the comfort of the shelter to follow Yuugo into yet another demon infested forest, much like how S1 left off, as the escapees left their once safe, comfortable life into the unknown world.

Or end at ch64? After Emma gets snatched by the poachers? It could work. It would certainly leave everyone wanting more, especially us manga readers because goddamn the GP arc would be SO close!

Perhaps ch74 after seeing Norman alive? Just so it’s not a big darn secret anymore to those who are going into this season blind? (how do people manage to stay anime only? i’m not trying to make anyone feel bad.. i’m just impressed? i caught up to the manga right after s1 because i didn’t have the self control to wait!)

Ending on that chapter would be so bittersweet to me.. because you know what appears in ch75 and it’s literally one of the only things I care about.

S2 preview trailers already teased some of the demon forest scenes I’m most excited about, so the only things left that will truly excite me are Yuugo and that darn outfit. (seriously, whenever we do get to see emma in her gp outfit for the first time, someone better scream at me so i can die from happiness.)

Okay, and all the GP kids too.. especially their trio!

Could they fit the Goldy Pond arc into a 12 episode season along with every other event that came before it? I.. seriously hope not?

Compared to s1, which was very dialogue heavy, GP is about as action packed as we’re gonna get in the near future, and those scenes are going to fly by once they get put into motion.

Quick example (because it was recent and i can’t think of something else atm): the Overhaul arc from My Hero Academia. Off the top my head it was about 40 total ch? That arc took up half of the show’s S4, which was a total 25 eps.

So with the GP ending at ch96, it’ll give us about 20-30 chapters (depending on where you personally see the start of this arc I guess? once yuugo leads the duo through the forest, when emma gets snatched or when the battle actually starts)

If GP were to happen in s2 where there’s 12 episodes.. literally everything would be so fast paced and I don’t want them to rush anything or leave stuff out?

Other options?

It’s very wishful thinking and I would be getting my hopes up for nothing, because I know it won’t happen, but I could possibly see them fitting GP arc if S2 was made up of 18eps?

6 eps for the demon forest, 6 for Goldy pPond, the remaining 6 to accommodate B06-32, Cuvitidala and any other anime original scenes as they wish.

Although fitting about 64 chapters into 12-18 episodes sounds a bit much.. but not really? I seriously have no idea at this point how much story we’re going to cover this season.

Could I perhaps place all my hopes towards a second cour later this year? Like for the summer.. or would I be expecting too much?

This all could’ve been avoided if they just tell us! Seriously, I’ve been thinking about episode count since last year.. and now you have to deal with this mindless chatter of mine.

I’d honestly be okay with another 12ep season though. We waited this long that I’ll just be excited to see all the children again.

Anime-only scenes:

Those 3 days the children spent learning from our demon friends? Yes please! Did you know Emma not only learned how to use a bow and arrow but a freakin’ harpoon as well? Like.. hello?? I must see this!

Perhaps they’ll even adopt some of the extra pages from some of the chapters, like they did in S1 with the flashback of Norman being sick in ep10.

I know this will be such a high hope, but I remember in ch177 how Emma claims that after they escaped, they all remembered how kind Isabella really was, so if they decide to adapt the extras from ch41-42 & ch45, I’ll cry.

And these pages? Cloverworks, please..

I’m literally begging here..

Especially these two! Even though I still doubt we’ll reach Goldy Pond if we get 12eps.. but in the future! Please!

Other random nonsense:

I may or may not get emotional upon seeing Isabella at the very start when she goes to confront Grandma Sarah. If her hair is kept down as it was at the end of S1 then I’ll give the anime staff my sincere thanks.

We only heard 15 seconds of “Identity” and yet it has been living in my head rent free ever since that trailer dropped. I need to hear the full song sooo damn badly, y’all have no idea.

Here’s hoping they don’t cut out the inner monologues again. At this moment I don’t remember any specific ones from the demon forest I want to see but I’m sure they’re present.

I’m ready to die at every cute Chris moment they give us.. and this entire scene where the kids scold Ray.

Literally every scene with Emma & Ray. They’re my top 2 favorites from this series okay? Of course I’m going to fangirl over them. (they already showed the hug in one of the trailers and i damn near cried)

If we see him, (which i’m sure we will, but i still have tiny some doubts) I hope they give Yuugo a fantastic voice actor.

Also, his nicknames for everyone!! Literally everything about that man I’m hyped for.

Again, very doubtful we’ll get GP in a 12ep season, but whenever that arc decides to grace us with its presence, “63194” better play on full blast when ch92-93 gets animated.

Speaking of music, while I’m completely excited to hear the new OST that Obata has in store for us (thank god he’s doing this season again btw!), I hope we hear some of those unused tracks from the first season, specifically “Their Own Thoughts.”

Every time Emma mentions their future, their goals or how her family will always be together, I’ll cry. (thanks demon god and your stupid reward)

Yes I’ll be doing those reaction posts (if you follow me i’m sure you’ve seen them by now) after every new episode as I do with other series I watch.. once I survive the usual long day at work, avoiding anything TPN related so I can watch in peace and quiet when I finally get home.. damn it, im already so anxious, help.

#the promised neverland #chidoroki used chatter

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tabloidtoc · 4 years ago

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OK, March 29

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Panic at the Palace -- Queen Elizabeth, Prince Charles, Prince William, Duchess Kate Middleton

Page 1: Big Pic -- Kevin Bacon and Juliette Lewis were among the many artists who put on a performance for Linda Perry's Rock 'N' Relief Live Stream Concert Series, benefitting Sean Penn's CORE Response organization

Page 2: Contents

Page 3: Contents

Page 4: Sparks are flying between Sandra Bullock and Brad Pitt on the set of their new action movie Bullet Train and not just when the cameras are rolling -- their chemistry is through the roof and Sandra lights up whenever she's around Brad and some of the cast and crew could swear they've seen him blushing in her presence -- Brad and Sandra have been hanging out more than your typical costars and they have a lot in common and seem to really enjoy each other's company and they'll frequently spend their breaks socializing and they can often be heard laughing over each other's stories and topics of conversations range from mutual friends and house repairs to more personal stuff, like kids

Page 6: Bruce Willis turned 66 on March 19 and as he celebrates the occasion, he has been reflecting on his life and it's been quite the journey but Bruce looks back at it all with that classic smirk

Page 7: Producers of the Gossip Girl reboot have been begging Blake Lively to join the cast of the new show but she's turned up her nose at the idea -- she's not ungrateful, because the original show made her star, but she closed the book on that part of her life a long time ago -- she's blissfully content in her role as a mom to daughters James, Inez and Betty whom she shares with her husband Ryan Reynolds and being a stay-at-home parent and filming an occasional movie sounds way more appealing to her than returning to that hothouse Gossip Girl universe -- she says she had her show and wants the new team to have theirs, but to die-hard fans, it still feels like a major snub

* After calling it quits on her romance with Ben Affleck in January, Ana de Armas is ready to play the field and Hollywood's heartthrob du jour, Rege-Jean Page has caught her eye and she was over the moon when the Bridgerton hunk recently signed on to her new thriller The Gray, which also stars Ryan Gosling and Chris Evans -- of course, Rege is gorgeous, but Ana also likes that he isn't your typical Tinseltown success story and comes from a rich cultural background, just like she does and she's hoping to get to know him better once they start shooting in L.A. -- while Ana has been warned that won't sit well with Rege's live-in girlfriend, Emily Brown, that doesn't seem to bother Ana

* Janet Jackson's life story is set to get the full documentary treatment next year, and no stone will be left unturned when it comes to her famously dysfunctional family -- the family is freaking out, as well they should be -- Janet will be brutally honest about her late father Joe Jackson, who bullied her and made her feel like she was nothing with out him but her siblings say they had it much worse especially when it came to Michael Jackson, who suffered verbal and physical abuse from Joe throughout his childhood -- Janet, who became a mom at 50 with her businessman ex, Wissam Al Mana, is also ready to tell all about their divorce and custody battle -- doing this documentary has been incredibly cathartic for her and she can't wait to shed light on her family's deep, dark secrets

Page 8: Angelina Jolie has been legally single for two years, and now she's finally ready to mingle -- she's been laying low since her 2016 split from Brad Pitt and she's feels it's time to get out there and she's eager to meet some new and interesting men and the mom of six is open to being hooked up by Hollywood pals like Ellen Pompeo, whom she was seen dining with in Beverly Hills and Angie likes the idea of dating a fellow A-lister who can relate to her about living in the spotlight and Ellen's been helping out with suggestions -- Angie is even open to joining an elite dating service and now the hunt is on to find a suitable bunch of candidates -- she wants fun and adventure again and after months of just being Mom, dressing up, putting on some perfume and engaging in stimulating conversation sounds good to Angie

* It's only been six months since Drew Barrymore launched her chirpy daytime talk show, but behind the scenes, she's on the verge of a major meltdown -- the multitasking mom who shares daughters Olive and Frankie with ex-hubby Will Kopelman, has no idea that juggling work and family would be this hard and she's feeling pressure from every side -- she desperately wants to be there for the kids, but she's trying to make her show a hit, and with her production company, she has a million others things on her plate as well -- the stressed-out star has also been chowing down on junk food and drinking too much caffeine so she can't get more than a few hours of sleep a night -- Drew doesn't want to let anyone down, but if she doesn't dial it back, she's going to collapse from exhaustion

* Matthew Perry announced his engagement to his on-off girlfriend Molly Hurwitz in November, but he seems to be having second thoughts -- he's crazy in love, but he's scared of messing up a good thing by making things official and he also worries what kind of husband he'll make given his health woes and battles with addiction -- Molly has faith in Matthew, but she can see wedding planning is stressing him out, even more so now that the Friends reunion is set to start shooting and he's pushing himself to go through with it, but his doubts are gnawing away at him

Page 10: Red Hot on the Red Carpet -- stars show some skin in dramatic decolletage-baring frocks -- Nicole Richie, Aja Naomi King

Page 11: Kate Hudson, Becky G, Mindy Kaling

Page 12: Who Wore It Better? Kat Graham vs. Nicole Kidman in Erdem, Oliva Wilde vs. Bella Hadid in Ralph Lauren

Page 13: Danielle Bradbery vs. Paula Abdul in Hamel

Page 14: News in Photos -- Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox stepped out for dinner in West Hollywood

Page 16: Ariel Winter brightened up her monochromatic look with a pink face mask during a trip to the hair salon in West Hollywood, Justin Theroux went for a walk with his beloved dog Kuma in NYC, Arnold Schwarzenegger was spotted on his daily bike ride in L.A.

Page 17: Susan Sarandon stopped to get her caffeine fix while shopping solo in Soho

Page 18: Lea Michele proved to be quite the doting mother while walking with her son in a stroller in Brooklyn, Lucy Hale and her dog Elvis were inseparable during an outing in L.A., Krysten Ritter took her RadRover electric bicycle out for a spin in L.A.

Page 19: John Stamos and his wife Caitlin McHugh stopped by an antique shop where they purchased a bunch of old goodies in Santa Monica

Page 20: This year, instead of a traditional runway show, Moschino released a 12-minute film featuring Karen Elson, Shalom Harlow and Amber Vallera wearing new styles from the Fall/Winter 2021 line

Page 21: Alessandra Ambrosio caught up with a pal while walking dogs in L.A., David Harbour eating a treat while out and about in NYC, Daisy Ridley stopped by The Graham Norton Show in London

Page 22: Amelia Gray Hamlin and boyfriend Scott Disick caught some rays while vacationing in Miami, Katie Holmes and boyfriend Emilio Vitolo Jr. color-coordinated their gray-and-black outfits for a lunch date in NYC, Rebel Wilson taking a walk around the neighborhood in L.A.

Page 24: While on the set of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Rachel Brosnahan shielded herself with a see-through umbrella, a newly brunette Lady Gaga in a white suit as she left her hotel in Rome to film the upcoming Gucci biopic, The Masked Singer panelist Jenny McCarthy gave herself a last-minute touch-up before posing for some promo shots

Page 26: Inside My Home -- Chelsea Handler's sleek setup -- she is checking out of her longtime L.A. home

Page 28: In 2009, LeAnn Rimes made headlines when she was caught hooking up with her costar Eddie Cibrian while they were both married to other people and now, more than a decade later, she is opening up about that time in her life and spilling secrets that she's never shared before -- looking back, LeAnn thinks it's unfair that she got raked over the coals like that and the public shaming caused her to suffer panic attacks and all LeAnn did was fall in love -- of course, there are likely big regrets about the way everything happened, but she and Eddie never meant to hurt anyone and they just had this connection they couldn't walk away from and a few months after their romance was revealed LeAnn parted ways with then-husband Dean Sheremet and Eddie filed for divorce from Brandi Glanville and they wed in 2011 -- while LeAnn has been a great stepmom to Eddie's sons Mason and Jack, she'd love to have a child of her own someday and she and Eddie have tried and tried with no success and now that she's pushing 40, they know time is ticking and they could always go the surrogate route, and they just might do it if it doesn't happen naturally in the next few months

Page 29: Liam Hemsworth has been dating Gabriella Brooks for 15 months, and he's so smitten that he could put a ring on it any day now -- Liam's made it clear that he's ready to walk down the aisle again after calling it quits in longtime love Miley Cyrus in 2019 -- everyone is thrilled because Gabriella is so sweet and easygoing, which is just what Liam needs -- Gabriella has already gotten the stamp of approval from the Hemsworth clan, who had long been skeptical of Miley and when Liam brought Gabriella home, his parents thought, that's more like it -- now that Liam's settled in at his new $5 million spread on Byron Bay, all signs point to him popping the question because he's never been happier

* Shedding post-pregnancy weight is never easy but luckily Katy Perry has a secret weapon to help her get back in shape which is Orlando Bloom -- Katy had already dropped 35 pounds since giving birth to the couple's first child, Daisy Dove, thanks to her fitness-obsessed fiance and Orlando has her eating five small vegan meals a day and he follows the same diet to make it easier for her, and Orlando makes sure she hikes or swims at least five days a week and those are the type for fun activities where he can join her -- Orlando's also her biggest cheerleader: during their recent Hawaiian getaway, Katy was nervous because she felt she hadn't lost enough weight but Orlando told her she was one sexy momma and he really is her biggest supporter

* Despite the pandemic, Nicole Kidman's remained one of the busiest women in Hollywood, which is getting under her stuck-at-home husband's skin -- while Keith Urban was forced to cancel his concert tour last year, Nicole had a whirlwind 2020, shooting her miniseries Nine Perfect Strangers in Australia and her historical thriller The Northman in Northern Ireland back-to-back and it's been incredibly hard on Keith because it drives him crazy not being able to get out there on stage -- Nicole hates seeing him the dumps, but she's told him he's lucky to be able to spend so much time with their daughters Sunday and Faith -- with Nicole set to play comedy legend Lucille Ball in Being the Ricardos, which starts filming this spring, that can only put more stress on the marriage but Nicole has no plans to slow down, and she's not making any apologies

Page 30: Patrick Duffy and Linda Purl went from zero to 60 practically overnight, but their turbo-charged romance appears to be slowing down -- ever since Patrick and Linda reconnected last summer, the late-in-life lovebirds have been joined at the hip at Linda's Colorado home, where things have gotten too close for comfort because Patrick's a laid-back guy, but he hasn't had a moment to himself because Linda is always pushing him to get outdoors and do stuff with her and Patrick feels the need for more space and some along time -- spending every moment together and hanging on each other's every word was fun for a while, but they don't want to lose their independence and they realize they need to bring their relationship back down to earth if they actually want to go the distance

* After nearly five blissful years together, Britney Spears and Sam Asghari are still going strong, and it looks like a baby could be in their near future -- Sam recently sent tongues wagging when he revealed that he wants to take their relationship to the next step and be a young dad and Britney is totally on board because she has always wanted another child and now with Sam raring to go, she figures it's the perfect time -- growing her family would be a welcome distraction from Britney's bitter battle with her father Jamie Spears over her controversial conservatorship

* Love Bites -- Jenni "JWoww" Farley and Zack Carpinello engaged, Morena Baccarin and husband Ben McKenzie welcomed a son named Arthur, Nicolas Cage and Riko Shibata married

Page 32: Cover Story -- Palace in Crisis -- the Royal Family is in disarray following Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's bombshell tell-all -- what really offended them was how much Harry and Meghan said they love Queen Elizabeth in one sentence and attacked the institution, everything she stands for and works for, in the next -- it's going to take a miracle for Harry to reconcile with his family after what he and Meghan revealed

Page 36: Celebrity Hall Passes -- stars reveal the Hollywood crushes their partners have granted as freebies -- Eric Decker gets Jessica Alba and his wife Jessie James Decker gets Post Malone

Page 37: Lisa Vanderpump gets George Clooney, Seth Rogen gets Charlize Theron while his wife Lauren Miller gets Brad Pitt, Mark Consuelos and Kelly Ripa both get Cynthia Bailey

Page 38: Taron Egerton gets Rachel Weisz while his girlfriend Emily Thomas gets Daniel Craig, Kyle Richards wouldn't let her husband Mauricio Umansky near Eva Longoria or Demi Moore but he gets a hall pass for Betty White, Beau Clark gets Bethenny Frankel while wife Stassi Schroeder gets Joaquin Phoenix

Page 40: Interview -- Queen Latifah -- the entertainment icon is having a blast kicking butt in her new TV crime drama The Equalizer

Page 42: The Great Outdoors -- these stars know fresh air and fitness make a killer combo

Page 46: Style Week -- Hailey Bieber has been named global ambassador for Superga's Spring/Summer 2021 season

Page 48: What's Hot Right Now -- lifestyle brand Sporty & Rich just launched chic athleisure pieces to help you look effortlessly cool this season -- Amber Valletta

Page 49: Stylish Shades -- shop Ashley Graham's flattering frames the model's new collection with Quay

Page 50: Chic House Dresses -- trade knits for airy frocks that will make you feel beautiful all through spring -- Whitney Port

Page 52: Girls' Getaway -- planning a safe spring break with a few BFFs? Pack these stylish essentials to easily look fab on the fly -- Rita Ora

Page 54: Entertainment

Page 55: Q&A with Wayne Brady

Page 58: Buzz -- Lady Gaga sent the internet into a frenzy after sharing a behind-the-scenes photo of herself with Adam Driver from the set of their Ridley Scott movie, House of Gucci

Page 60: Sound Bites -- Cardi B on staying away from celebs, Mary Steenburgen on husband Ted Danson, Kate Hudson on her iconic yellow dress from How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Page 61: Paul Bettany on his stunt with Tom Hanks in The Da Vinci Code, Jada Pinkett Smith on not focusing on exterior beauty at age 49, Nikki Bella on being intimate with fiance Artem Chigvintsev, Charlize Theron on homeschooling, Julia Garner on her roles of choice

Page 62: Horoscope -- Aries Jessica Chastain turned 44 on March 24

Page 64: By the Numbers -- Paris Hilton

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creativerogues · 6 years ago

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25 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About the Monk...

1. Flurry of Blows happens “immediately after you take the Attack Action on your turn”. (Player’s Handbook, Page 78)

2. Unarmed Strikes are not Light Melee Weapons – specifically to avoid the Second Attack granted by Two-Weapon Fighting.

3. Only Ki Abilities that are explicitly magical (such as creating the effects of a Spell) are suppressed in an Antimagic Field, though a DM could decide that these Abilities are all magical.

4. The Open Hand Technique of the Way of the Open Hand Monk can be used whenever you hit with a Flurry of Blows Attack. Nothing prevents you from using a different Open Hand Technique Option each time you hit. (Player’s Handbook, Page 79)

For example, if both your Flurry of Blows Attacks hit, you can knock one opponent back 15 feet and knock another opponent Prone in the same turn.

Or cause a Single Target to be knocked Prone and also render the same target unable to take Reactions until the end of your next turn, all with just two hits from your Flurry of Blows.

5. A Stunned Creature automatically fails any Strength or Dexterity Saving Throw, so be sure to use your Stunning Strike before using something like a Way of the Four Elements Spells or a Way of the Open Hand’s Open Hand Technique. (See ‘Stunned’ Condition, Player’s Handbook, Page 292)

6. Martial Arts does allow you to use Strength for the Attack and Damage rolls of your Unarmed Strikes. (Player’s Handbook, Page 78)

7. Your Martial Arts Die can be used to replace the Damage Die of a Monk Weapon you wield. (Player’s Handbook, Page 78)

8. When using Patient Defence, until the start of your next turn, any Attack roll made against you has Disadvantage if you can see the Attacker, and any Dexterity Saving Throws you make are made with Advantage. (Player’s Handbook, Page 192)

You don’t realise how many times people use Patient Defence and forget what the Dodge Action actually does…

9. A Monk loses the benefits of their Patient Defence if they are Grappled, Incapacitated, Paralysed, Petrified, Restrained, Stunned, Unconscious, or if the Monk’s Movement Speed is reduced to 0. (Player’s Handbook, Page 78 and 290 - 292)

10. Any increase or decrease to a Monk’s Movement Speed changes the additional movement granted by their Step of the Wind by the same amount. (Player’s Handbook, Page 192)

For example, if a Monk’s Speed was reduced from 30 Feet to 15 Feet, the Monk can only move an additional 15 Feet with their Step of the Wind Feature.

11. When Jumping, your Running Long Jump Distance is a Number of Feet equal to your Strength Score, your Standing Long Jump Distance is half that distance.

Your Running High Jump let’s you leap into the air a Number of Feet equal to 3 + your Strength Score. Your Standing High Jump Distance is half your Running High Jump Distance.

Step of the Wind doubles your Jump Distance, remember the rules for Jumping (Page 182 of the PHB).

12. If you take an Attack Action that includes more than one Attack, you can break up your Movement even further by moving between those attacks. (Player’s Handbook, Page 190)

For example, a Monk can make two Unarmed Strikes with the Extra Attack Feature and has a Movement Speed of 40 feet at Level 5 could move 20 Feet, make an Unarmed Strike Attack, and move a further 20 Feet and Attack again.

And yes, you can move between an attack and an attack granted by Flurry of Blows, despite it not being mentioned in the Player’s Handbook.

13. If you have more than one Movement Speed, such as a Climbing Speed or Flying Speed, you can switch back and forth between your Speeds during your Movement on your turn. Whenever you switch, subtract the distance you’ve already moved from the new Movement Speed. (Player’s Handbook, Page 190)

For example, an Aaracokra Monk can walk 20 Feet, before Flying another 30 Feet. And a Tabaxi Monk can climb 10 Feet, before running another 20 Feet.

14. The Open Hand Monk can knock Creatures of any size Prone using their Open Hand Technique.

So yes, you can knock that Gargantuan Ancient Red Dragon right on its butt if it fails that Dexterity Save.

15. A Monk can use Deflect Missiles as a Reaction every Round and does not require any sort of “Recharge”. (Player’s Handbook, Page 78)

New Monk Players often get confused but remember this: It costs 0 Ki Points to attempt to deflect the missile, but costs 1 Ki Point to throw the missile back at the Attacker or another Target.

16. A Monk can attempt a Stunning Strike multiple times per Round, using it each time they land a successful Hit on a Creature, but remember that the cost is 1 Ki Point per Stunning Strike attempt. (Player’s Handbook, Page 79)

17. You don’t need Ki-Empowered Strikes to punch Ghosts or other Incorporeal Creatures, just remember that they have Resistance to Damage from all Non-Magical Attacks. (Player’s Handbook, Page 79)

18. With a Monk’s ‘Tongue of the Sun and Moon’ Feature, they understand all languages, including Druidic and Thieves’ Cant. (Player’s Handbook, Page 79)

19. At 14th Level, a Monk can spend 1 Ki Point to re-roll a Saving Throw they failed and take the Second Result. (Player’s Handbook, Page 79)

20. Through your ‘Timeless Body’ Feature, you no longer need food or water, but a Monk still needs Sleep and still needs to breathe. (Player’s Handbook, Page 79)

21. When using a Monk’s ‘Empty Body’ Feature, the Monk becomes Invisible for 1 Minute this form of invisibility does not require Concentration and attacking or Casting a Spell does not break this form of Invisibility. (Player’s Handbook, Page 79)

22. At 11th Level, any attempting to attack a Way of the Open Hand Monk must first succeed on a Wisdom Saving Throw. If they succeed, they can attack the Monk as they please. If they fail, the creature must choose a new target or lose the attack or spell. (Player’s Handbook, Page 80)

For more information, see the ‘Tranquillity’ Feature and the Sanctuary Spell.

23. The Way of the Drunken Master’s 11th Level Feature ‘Drunkard’s Luck’ works in tow with the Monk’s 14th Level Feature ‘Diamond Soul’.

This means if you’re rolling a Saving Throw with Disadvantage, you can spend 2 Ki Points to cancel the Disadvantage, and even if you fail the Saving Throw, you can spend 1 Ki Point to roll again and take the second result.

And as a side note, both Drunkard’s Luck and Diamond Soul also work with the Lucky Feat, so now you’re almost guaranteed not to fail a Saving Throw…

24. A Common Strategy for a Way of the Four Elements Monk is for them to use Stunning Strike on one or more Creatures, before using their next turn (or even the same turn) to cast a Spell that requires a Dexterity or Strength Saving Throw.

Because the Creature (or Creatures) are Stunned, they automatically fail any Strength or Dexterity Saving Throw, and take the full damage and effects of the Spell.

Yes, there is the potential to, in one turn, Stun a bunch a Creatures, and release a Fireball right in the middle. Every Stunned Creature automatically fails their Dex Save, and take the full 8d6 Fire Damage of the Spell…

25. A Way of the Open Hand Monk can choose to impose their Quivering Palm after they hit a Creature, and do not need to declare their use of Quivering Palm before rolling an Attack or Damage Roll.

#Monk #Monks #dnd #DnD 5e #d&d 5e #d&d #Strategies & Tips

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razieltwelve · 5 years ago

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Quarantine Post #1

Quarantine: Day 17

We're running low on toilet paper. I might have no choice but to make another supply run. I can only hope it goes better than the last one. Twelve of us went out on that last supply run. Only seven of us made it back. Those bastards from up north have started hoarding supplies, and they're in no mood to share. They've got some real firepower too. I don't know where the hell they got a grenade launcher, but I was damn lucky not to be on the wrong end of it.

Quarantine: Day 19

The toilet paper convoy got hit on its way to the supermarket. It must have been the northern crew. A couple of our scouts say there is still some toilet paper in the wreckage. Maybe they didn't have enough trucks to carry it all off. We'll wait until nightfall and then make a run for it. If we're lucky, we can snag a couple of rolls each.

Jameson suggested using leaves. After all, there are plenty of gum trees. I'd almost forgotten he only joined us around Day 10. I told him what happened to Simmons. The damn drop bears got him. With the fires burning so much down, they haven't got anything to eat out in the bush, so they've been getting closer and closer to the cities. Simmons, the poor bastard, was wiping his ass with some eucalyptus leaves when they caught him with his pants down. By the time the screaming stopped, the only thing left was his pants.

Quarantine: Day 20

It was a trap. Those jerks from up north were waiting for us. They let us get right up to the toilet paper before giving us both barrels. We lost Wilkins and Chan to snipers before we even knew what was happening. Felton and Hassan went down a couple of seconds later when they opened fire from all sides.

I don't know how I got out of there. I grabbed as much toilet paper as I could, threw it in my backpack, and screamed for everyone to fall back. It was chaos, and then they started shooting that damn grenade launcher. My ears are still ringing. Somehow, I made it out of there, along with half a dozen others. We're all pretty banged up, and we've been picking shrapnel out of Cuthbert all night. I don't know if he's going to make it. I hope he does. He's a good man, and he's handy with a rifle too.

Quarantine: Day 27

I don't know what the hell those northern bastards have been smoking, but they just torched the Coles. That was one of the biggest supermarkets in the area, and one of the only ones still getting regular supply drops. Now, the damn thing is on fire, and we can see the smoke from kilometres away.

Patel thinks it's a power struggle. He says the northern group has gotten big enough to support multiple factions. He might be right. There were a damn lot of them shooting at us when they sprang that trap with the toilet paper. If it is a power struggle, I'm hoping they wipe each other out. It means more toilet paper for us and less trouble all around.

Quarantine: Day 30

I begged Smith not to go out at night. I begged him. I said it was too dangerous. There are a lot of trees out here, and night time is drop bear time. But he wouldn't listen. He figured he could hit the supermarket around midnight, maybe sneak out some extra supplies.

He'd only been gone five minutes when I heard the screaming. It was... it was awful. He must have screamed and wailed for at least an hour before they finally put him out of his misery. That's what drops bears are like. They know how people think. They know if they hurt one person that others will come running to see what's going on. One person can't feed a pack of drops bears - but a whole group of people? That'll do nicely for them.

There wasn't anything we could do for him. All we could do was listen until finally they must have realised we weren't going to come. Poor bastard. I wish I'd been close enough to put a bullet in him to make it quick. Hopefully, nobody else tries anything at night. There are a lot of trees here. Too many.

Quarantine: Day 37

We got a bunch of refugees from down south near the centre of the city. We had to check them all for any sign of infection. There have been rumours the Infected aren't just getting sick anymore. We've heard they're changing. We got lucky. Far as we can tell, none of them are Infected.

I talked to their leaders, a man and a woman. Claire said they'd come from one of the hotels near the harbour where they've been putting people in quarantine. It worked well enough the first few days, but she said once the Infected started changing it all went to hell. She and her husband, Rob, got out of there as quick as they could and grabbed anyone else who could keep up.

She couldn't really describe what the Infected looked like, but she told me I'd know when I saw them. After what happened to Smith, I figure there's not a lot left in this world that can scare me. But, hey, what do I know? I figured this whole thing was going to blow over in a couple of weeks, and here we are.

Quarantine: Day 40

We finally got word back from the Old Folks Home. I was worried they'd been wiped out, but apparently, they've got a militia going. Good for them. I went over there with a few other people to talk. I know their leader, a tough, old fella who cut his teeth fighting in Vietnam. I used to drop by and help with the garden down there, so I was hopeful he'd hear me out.

It went pretty well. It turns out they've been self-isolating, trying to keep clean of the infection and everything, but they're running low on supplies. We made a deal. They've got a generator and access to washing machines, and we've gotten good at hitting up supermarkets and other depots after supply drops. We get them the supplies they need, and they get all of our stuff clean. It's a good deal. I can't wait to sleep on clean sheets that don't have blood all over them.

Quarantine: Day 45

Someone tried to raid the Old Folks Home. They gave us a call over the radio, and we came running. There was a whole bunch of them in cars. I didn't recognise them. They must have come from someplace else. I think a few of them were flying Vaucluse colours, though. They were about to break through when we got there.

We gave them a good beating, and the old folks did their bit too. I've never seen a granny with a flamethrower before, but damn if she wasn't good with it. We took a couple of prisoners. It turns out things in the city are way worse than we thought.

The Infected are everywhere. Surry Hills is gone. Bondi is burning. And that last they saw of it, Darling Harbour was being overrun. There's nothing left down there, so they're heading north, trying to get someplace safe, and most of them don't care who they have to kill to get there. It's a damn shame. If they'd just told us they were planning on passing through, we'd have let them go, so long as they didn't try to take any of our supplies.

Quarantine: Day 48

We got a message for the military today. They're pulling back to defend Canberra. Sydney, Melbourne, everywhere else... they're lost causes. We're on our own. It sucks. But they've got to defend the capital and what's left of our government. On their way out though, they left us some satellite communications equipment.

It's pretty grim.

We got into contact with them, and they told us about the situation overseas. Italy is gone. The Infected just overran the place. Spain is fighting, but they've got a week, maybe less, before they go under too. China claims they've fought back the tide, but I don't think any of us believe that. They wouldn't be buying up every weapon they could find if things were okay.

Britain is... we don't know. We haven't gotten much word from them in more than a week, apparently, and the last we heard the Prime Minister was one of the Infected. As for the United States, well, they're still fighting. I figure if anyone can fight off the Infected, they can. We'll have to hope they can manage it. If they go down, I think we're just about finished.

Author's Notes

In all seriousness, it isn't actually this bad in Australia although the toilet paper shortage is a real thing. Anyway, I hope everyone is staying safe. Take care of each other.

If you’re interested in my thoughts on writing and other topics, you can find those here.

You can find my original fiction on Amazon here

#australia #original fiction #humor #humour #satire #musings

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blackcoffeeandblankpagess · 5 years ago

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Tips for road tripping across country?!

Oof Idk where to start lol.

I’ll just list out some things that come to mind cause I could probably go on forever

Try to utilize people you know when it comes to places to stay, or at least be creative. For instance, last summer Jared and I knew we were stopping in boulder and I have extended family there so I asked if we could spend a night at their place, it turned out they were out of town so they literally just left us the keys and we had the place to ourselves for a few days, it was great. I happen to have a pretty big network of friends/family around the country so no matter which route I take chances are I’ll be passing somewhat through an area with people I know and generally, if those people live on the other side of the country I probably haven’t seen them in awhile so it’s nice to stop in and say hi regardless. Even if people don’t live in the exact spot you want to visit, when you’re driving across the whole freaking country taking an hour detour for a free place to sleep isn’t too big a deal (obvi like...don’t take advantage of people who you never speak to, but generally I’ve not had problems with this)

Pack food! I like to eat out a decent amount when traveling because it’s part of the experience, but you don’t need to eat EVERY meal out. Having a little cooler with snacks and stuff can save a lot of money, and also reduce stress if you’re out in the middle of nowhere at a meal time without a lot of options (trust me, at least in the US there is a whooooole lot of nothing out there). This is also good for taking leftovers if you do go out to eat! When Jared and I drove back recently we got takeout for dinner twice and I managed to make 2 meals out of it each time by putting it in the hotel fridge overnight and packing it in the cooler the next day. Also going on a grocery run before you leave to pick up a few essentials is SO worth it. We spent probably like $20 on bread, pb, jelly, veggies, hummus, bagels, cream cheese, etc. (also using stuff we already had in our fridge/pantry) and even if we only skipped ONE meal out because we had those things we would already basically be breaking even. Also, when there isn’t a PANDEMIC happening, a lot of hotels come with breakfast (if staying in a hotel) so that’s also a way to cut food costs (I mean...ignoring the fact that hotels are already $$$)

Plan your route around some things you really want to see! Every time I’ve traveled across the country there has been a reason for it, I’ve never taken the trip JUST for fun, but all that really means is that the start and end point were predetermined, what I did in the middle was up to me and whoever I was with. I like to plan my trips around national parks and cities I’ve never been to. The national parks out west in the US are super cool because a lot of them are in random ass places that might not be worth taking an individual trip to get to. If I have to choose between two places I try to think where I would be willing to take more time/maybe fly to someday as a longer trip, and then I stop at the quicker spot on my road trip. Also, in the US you can get an annual pass for national parks, I forget how much it is but I usually get it. I think if you visit like...3 parks in a year it basically pays itself off which is really easy to do depending on where you live/where you’re visiting on your trip.

Reach out to people who are familiar with the places you’re visiting for advice! If I only have a day in a place I want to experience as much as possible and see the best that it has to offer, which is where knowing locals can come in handy. Half the time I literally toss out places on here and chances are I get a few recommendations which really helps! Going to a place you know nothing about can be super overwhelming if you don’t know where to start.

Take advantage of free stuff i.e. nature, parks, museums, etc. When we drove across the country recently we pretty much stayed on one road the whole time without stopping for much ~fun~ but even then there were a bunch of cool scenic viewpoints and even just taking 20 mins to drive around a city before we left and look at the city hall etc. was cool

If you are traveling with someone make sure it is someone you can tolerate spending extended periods of time with lol and that you have similar preferences for spending time in the car!!!! for instance some people like constant music, some silence, some podcasts, etc. It doesn’t seem like a big deal but if you are going to spend like 40 hours in a car it matters

Back to places to stay- my first pick is always contacting people I know, but after that tbh I just go for like...the cheapest hotel or airbnb. It also depends if you’re only stopping somewhere literally for 1 night to sleep or if you will be there for a few days. You could def also camp but I have yet to do that on a roadtrip despite saying I should (to be fair, we would have this spring if, ya know, the world wasn’t imploding), if you stay a little outside of a city it’s usually cheaper AND because most national parks are in the middle of nowhere if you go visit those sometimes the lodging is cheaper (but also look in advance because sometimes it is few and far between)

I could probably say like 40000 things but I’ll leave it there. The biggest monetary factors are lodging and food (and gas but there’s only so much you can do about that). Like I said if you get creative with it it really does not have to cost TOO much, but it totally depends on your priorities, how long you’re going, what you like to do, where you go, who you know, etc.

#answered

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magicsmutshop · 6 years ago

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When You See My Base Line - Pt 1

part 1 of 4

Pairing: Jung Hoseok/Reader Genre: Multi-chapter smut Rating: Explicit Word count: ~2500 Warnings: Alcohol, swearing, drooling over Hoseok’s perfect face and body Summary: You need a hobby, so you take a figure drawing class. Hoseok is the nude model. Note: this is my first fic so please take good care of me! Navigation: part 2 | part 3 | part 4

Who is that man talking to Namjoon by the desk? You’ve never seen him before, but as you look him up and down, you definitely like what you see. Dark, wavy hair with blond streaks flops over his finely-drawn eyebrows. The man’s eyes appealingly crinkle as he beamed at your art teacher, showing off a wide, heart-shaped grin. He looks a bit short standing next to Namjoon--but who doesn’t, next to that tree of a man? More importantly, his loose hoodie and baggy yellow shorts reveal swathes of honey skin and lean muscle. He has the look of a dancer, slender but powerful. Your eyes catch on his exposed thighs (those shorts were really rather short, weren’t they?). Damn, those are truly something to behold. You’d never considered yourself a leg woman before, but those yellow shorts are changing your outlook.

As you drag your appreciative gaze back up his body and face (was that a freckle on his top lip?), you realize Yellow Shorts is looking right back at you. You get lost in his dark brown eyes for a moment until it dawns on you that you’ve just been busted checking this gorgeous man out. His smile grows impossibly wider as your cheeks grow hot. Damn your easy blushes.

You quickly break eye contact, busying yourself with digging through your leather satchel, pretending to look for your pencils. Your hands are actually trembling a bit, and you can feel your heart pounding. How can a 5-second eye lock have such an effect on you? Yellow Shorts is still talking to Namjoon, but every time you accidentally look in their direction (who are you kidding? Your stare is drawn to him like you're magnetized), you can feel the weight of his gaze on you.

Suddenly, Namjoon breaks the tension by clapping his hands together, drawing the attention of everyone sitting at their easels. You turn your attention towards your teacher, but out of the corner of your eyes, you notice Yellow Shorts slipping away towards the screen in the corner of the studio. Is he the model for tonight? You could only be so lucky.

“Hey guys, welcome to week three! Glad you could all make it out on this rainy evening.” Namjoon addresses the class, a dimple appearing in his right cheek as he smiles. “By now, you’re all pretty familiar with the drill, right? We’ll start off with 5 minutes of quick warm-up sketches, and then move into some 10-minute poses. 15 minute coffee break at the hour mark, and then we’ll do a 45-minute pose. Sound good?” He nudges his black-rimmed glasses up his nose as your classmates murmur their agreement.

As you pull your sketchbook out of your bag, you think back to how you’d ended up in this studio in the first place.

---

You’d just ended an 18-month long relationship a few months prior. It was a reasonably amicable breakup--no cheating or dramatics. You had just… fallen out of love. In fact, you weren’t sure if you were ever actually in love. Your relationship had quickly fizzled out of the honeymoon stage, so towards the end, you were in a rut of watching bad tv together on the couch nightly, your ex playing Overwatch on his laptop while you browsed Twitter on your phone. Your sex life wasn’t any more interesting--you hadn’t even “Overwatch and chilled” in quite a while. One night, you looked over at him and realized you had no desire to do this for the next 40 years, and told him it was over. He shrugged, barely looking up from his game.

However, no matter how boring it had been towards the end, it had been comfortable companionship, so your apartment now seemed empty at night. Even the stereotypical post-breakup gym routine couldn’t fill the hours, although you had never looked better. You thought about getting back into the dating game, but the selection of men on the apps was, to put it lightly, terrible.

One night, you were out at a bar with your best friend getting wine-drunk and complaining about your boredom. Ashley took a long sip of her drink before looking at you over her glass. “You know what you need? You need a hobby. And no, Twitter and Tinder don’t count.”

“Twitter is a perfectly valid hobby. I’m keeping up on the latest political news and memes! Plus did you see the latest posts from Mark Ruffalo? That guy is a genius.” You drained the last of your glass and looked around for the server. You needed another drink.

Ashley scoffed. “You’re not even keeping up with politics. You’re getting into flamewars with people over the latest episode of the Bachelorette.” Damn. Your best friend knew you too well. She turned her head and effortlessly flagged the server over while checking her watch. Twenty minutes left for happy hour specials. “Hi, can we get two more glasses of the rosé please?”

You resisted the urge to check your Twitter account and incur more of Ashley’s scorn. “What do you suggest, then?”

“My coworker, you know the one that had the breakdown after she walked in on her husband fucking the babysitter?” Ashley paused as the server dropped off the fresh drinks. You nodded--that was a juicy story you wouldn’t be forgetting anytime soon. “Anyway, she started taking art classes at the rec center. She does everything from pottery to watercolors. Apparently, her psychologist recommended it, but she loves it. She never stops talking about how healing it’s been.”

You wrinkled your nose. “The rec center? I thought those classes were for kids and senior citizens.”

“She did mention there are a lot of old people in her classes. But get this--the drawing teacher was this really hot Korean guy. With dimples.” Ashley gave you a meaningful look. She really did know you too well.

“Ehh… art class? I don’t know if that’s really my thing. I haven’t touched a sketchbook in years.” You had actually been a decent artist in high school, but had dropped it in college as you got wrapped up in your classes and parties. You honestly couldn’t remember the last time you’d done anything artistic, outside of mandatory bridesmaid crafting duties for bridal showers and bachelorette parties.

“Hot. Korean. Guy. With. Dimples.” Wine splashed out of Ashley’s glass as she jabbed your finger at you for emphasis. “Plus, getting some culture could be healing for you. It worked for Jessica. You really need to get out of the apartment more.”

You gently grabbed Ashley’s glass, rescuing the wine from her flailing and promptly. pouring it down your throat. “I’ll think about it.” You weren’t going to think about it. There was no way you were going to take an art class with a bunch of senior citizens, even with the lure of a hot instructor.

Two drinks later for each of you, Ashley was squinting at your credit card, trying to type the numbers into the rec center’s shitty website on her phone. “Boom, you’re signed up. Class starts Monday so you’d better get your supplies this weekend.”

In your rosé-induced haze, what you hadn’t realized is that Ashley had signed you up for a figure drawing class. You were in for a double shock when you walked into the rec center 10 minutes late that first Monday night. The first shock, that the teacher, Namjoon, really was that hot (with fantastic dimples)--and the second shock, that there was a nude middle-aged man posing on a couch on a small stage.

Much to your surprise (and Ashley’s smugness), the figure drawing class really was enjoyable. Namjoon was a great teacher--patient and encouraging--and you’d forgotten how good it felt to create something rather than just passively consuming media. You’d even gotten used to the nudity as you focused on capturing the model in efficient pencil strokes in your sketchbook. Your first few figure sketches were horribly amateur, but you soon got caught up in the art, and the first two classes had flown by. The second week’s model had been a young college-aged woman with the most amazing tiger tattoo covering her back, which had been a lot of fun to draw. You had been looking forward to what week three would bring, but you had no idea what was really in store for you.

---

As you finish setting out your pencils and erasers, you notice motion from the corner of the room again. The hot guy from earlier emerges from behind the screen… and he's no longer wearing the shorts, but is wrapped in a knee-length gray robe. Oh holy shit, he really is the model for the night. One of your pencils goes flying out of your suddenly-clammy grip and clatters across the floor, rolling to a stop in front of Yellow Shorts. Your face bursts into flames again.

His face scrunches up into a warm smile. “Oops! You might need this.” He bends over (don’t look at his ass, don’t look at his ass), scoops the pencil up, and saunters over to your desk. The pencil appears in your line of vision where you're staring fixedly down at your sketchbook. Slowly, you look up and meet his twinkling eyes. His smile doesn’t dim as you stare blankly up at him and the little dimples in his cheeks, but he waves the pencil in front of you again. Your attention caught by his hands, you suddenly notice how long and elegant his fingers are. He wears a silver ring on his middle finger, and a delicate chain on his wrist.

As if in a dream, you finally take the pencil from him. Your hand brushes his. His fingers are warm and dry, but you feel your breath catch at the light touch. He drags a fingertip across your palm as he lets go of the pencil. Your eyes snap up to his, which look decidedly darker. But his light tone of voice doesn’t match his eyes as he simply says, “Here you go! Please use it to draw me well!” He turns away to join Namjoon in front of the stage.

Namjoon chuckles quietly. “Everyone, this is Hoseok, our model for tonight. Some of you might know him already. He’s the dance teacher here at the rec center, but moonlights as an art model in his free time.” A dancer, of course. That explains the muscle. Your blush still hasn’t gone down and your palm is still tingling as you try not to stare at his toned legs. Namjoon turns to Hoseok and claps him on the shoulder. “We’ll start with the 5-minute warmup first, so just change your pose every time you hear the timer beep.”

Yellow Shorts--Hoseok--nods cheerfully. “Aye aye, boss!” He steps up on the stage and unceremoniously shrugs out of his robe, laying it to one side and sitting down on the chaise lounge. All of the blood that had previously been in your cheeks is now rushing down to lower parts as you’re treated to an uninterrupted view of his sinuous body. He’s perfect. His collarbones catch the light as he turns his face to the side, revealing a sharp profile. His biceps flex lightly as he lowers himself down on one elbow, accentuating the line from his elegant shoulders to his narrow waist. A very defined v-line draws your eyes from his lean abs to his relaxed cock resting on one of his gorgeous thighs. You subtly squeeze your legs together under your desk at the sight. Shit, even his dick is perfect. You genuinely think your heart might stop--but what a way to go.

Suddenly, your lustful reverie is broken by the sound of the timer going off, indicating that a minute in the quick sketch period had gone by and it’s time for Hoseok to switch poses. You haven’t drawn a single line in your sketchbook yet. You’re fucked.

read part 2

#bts smut #jhope smut #hoseok smut #hoseok/reader #j-hope smut #hobi smut #hoseok x reader #j-hope x reader

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winterhopeinferorose · 5 years ago

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Happy Birthday Bob. Years after your death and you are still teaching us. And inspiring us.

Which one is your favorite?

1. “There’s nothing wrong with having a tree as a friend.”

2. “The secret to doing anything is believing that you can do it. Anything that you believe you can do strong enough, you can do. Anything. As long as you believe.”

3. “We don’t make mistakes. We just have happy accidents.”

4. “I think there’s an artist hidden at the bottom of every single one of us.”

5. “You too can paint almighty pictures.”

6. “No pressure. Just relax and watch it happen.”

7. “Don’t forget to make all these little things individuals — all of them special in their own way.”

8. “Find freedom on this canvas.”

9. “It’s so important to do something every day that will make you happy.”

10. “Talent is a pursued interest. Anything that you’re willing to practice, you can do.”

11. “Make love to the canvas.”

12. “[Painting] will bring a lot of good thoughts to your heart.”

13. “We artists are a different breed of people. We’re a happy bunch.”

14. “We want happy paintings. Happy paintings. If you want sad things, watch the news.”

15. “That’s a crooked tree. We’ll send him to Washington.”

16. “Every day is a good day when you paint.”

17. “I think each of us, sometime in our life, has wanted to paint a picture.”

18. “We tell people sometimes: We’re like drug dealers, come into town and get everybody absolutely addicted to painting. It doesn’t take much to get you addicted.”

19. “They say everything looks better with odd numbers of things. But sometimes I put even numbers — just to upset the critics.”

20. “Gotta give him a friend. Like I always say, ‘Everyone needs a friend.’”

21. “See how it fades right into nothing. That’s just what you’re looking for.”

22. “If I paint something, I don’t want to have to explain what it is.”

23. “Water’s like me. It’s lazy. Boy, it always looks for the easiest way to do things.”

24. “In painting, you have unlimited power. You have the ability to move mountains. You can bend rivers. But when I get home, the only thing I have power over is the garbage.”

25. “Don’t forget to tell these special people in your life just how special they are to you.”

26. “Didn’t you know you had that much power? You can move mountains. You can do anything.”

27. “I like to beat the brush.”

28. “Just let go — and fall like a little waterfall.”

29. “Talk to the tree, make friends with it.”

30. “I taught my son to paint mountains like these, and guess what? Now he paints the best darn mountains in the industry.”

31. “I really believe that if you practice enough you could paint the ‘Mona Lisa’ with a two-inch brush.”

32. “Be so very light. Be a gentle whisper.”

33. “Use absolutely no pressure. Just like an angel’s wing.”

34. “You need the dark in order to show the light.”

35. “You can do anything you want to do. This is your world.”

36. “You have to allow the paint to break to make it beautiful.”

37. “However you think it should be, that’s exactly how it should be.”

38. “In nature, dead trees are just as normal as live trees.”

39. “You can have anything you want in the world — once you help everyone around you get what they want.”

40. “If you do too much, it’s going to lose its effectiveness.”

41. “This is happy place; little squirrels live here and play.”

42. “That’s where the crows will sit. But we’ll have to put an elevator to put them up there because they can’t fly, but they don’t know that, so they still try.”

43. “Remember how free clouds are. They just lay around in the sky all day long.”

44. “We don’t really know where this goes — and I’m not sure we really care.”

45. “If we’re going to have animals around we all have to be concerned about them and take care of them.”

46. “You can do anything here — the only prerequisite is that it makes you happy.”

47. “Go out on a limb — that’s where the fruit is.”

48. “Isn’t it fantastic that you can change your mind and create all these happy things?”

49. “Anytime you learn, you gain.”

50. “It’s life. It’s interesting. It’s fun.”

#art #bob ross #quotes

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ckret2 · 6 years ago

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Rodorah (Rodan/Ghidorah) and related MonsterVerse fic masterpost

Formerly “Rodorah and Ghidorah-centric fic masterpost” but at this point I’ve added a lot of fics that are part of the same continuity but not about Rodorah or Ghidorah, so.

Right now, only the Rodorah fics are a single connected storyline; but the other fics are, in my mind, in the same continuity/running on the same headcanons as the Rodorah fics, and so contribute to them.

Newly-added fics are marked in bold. This post was updated June 25, 2020. (Check the original post for more fics if it’s been a while!)

Rodorah fics, in chronological order, separated by lot arc:

How Cute (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective; Ghidorah & Rodan’s first fight/meeting)

The Things He Knew But Hadn’t Been Taught (AO3) (Rodan’s perspective; Ghidorah & Rodan’s first fight/meeting)

But Tomorrow, The World Will End (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective(s); only one of the heads has developed a crush on Rodan; one is neutral; and one is furious about this. Set during the flight to Boston.)

Nausea & Numbness (and the Slim Possibility of Happiness) (AO3)(Ghidorah’s perspective(s); during their final showdown, Ghidorah sacrifices a certain victory and yields to Godzilla in order to protect the injured Rodan.)

Translating Titans (AO3) (Madison, Ilene, & Mothra’s perspectives; when the battle ends with Ghidorah’s surrender, Monarch & titans alike struggle to figure out what just happened—and what’s going to happen next.)

Now What? (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective(s); While flying “home” with Rodan, Ghidorah realizes they’ve got absolutely no idea what to do with their lives now.)

Three Eggs in a Cold Volcano (AO3) (Rodan’s perspective; Rodan tries to figure out why he and Ghidorah are so different from each other. He still hasn’t been told that Ghidorah is a different species, much less an alien.)

Once upon a time, they met an alien (AO3) (Ghidorah, Ni’s perspective; the reason why Ni is so furious that Ichi’s decided to pursue his crush)

Conversational Pteranodon 101 (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective(s); to get Ghidorah into his nest, Rodan teaches Ghidorah his language. By throwing rocks at them.)

Gold Gilt on Molten Basalt (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective(s); Ghidorah takes a flight to burn off their excess crush-on-Rodan energy, fails, goes home, and finally cuddles with Rodan.)

Weird (AO3) (Rodan’s perspective; being cuddled freaked Rodan out. He goes to Mothra for help sorting out what the hell just happened.)

Machine Maker Music (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective(s); while Rodan’s visiting Mothra, Ghidorah goes to Boston to scavenge a speaker and give humans the stink eye.)

Antarctica (AO3) (Ghidorah & Rodan’s perspectives; Ghidorah decides to leave Earth after figuring out Rodan isn’t nearly as into them as they are into him; but Rodan is into Ghidorah enough to try to kick their ass into staying.)

Godzilla Recycles (AO3) (human perspective; a look at what the hell humanity is making of the soap opera going down on Isla de Mara; and Godzilla & Mothra discuss how to deal with the temporarily-pacified three-headed alien menace.)

Conversational Pteranodon: Intermediate Level (AO3) (Rodan perspective; while stuck in Antarctica together due to Ghidorah’s injured wing, Rodan decides this is a fine time to have another language lesson. He still thinks throwing rocks is a fine instructive tool.)

The Toughest Lizard On Earth (AO3) (Ghidorah, Rodan, & Godzilla perspective; Ghidorah’s mildly drunk, chilling on a boat that’s gonna take way too long to get back to Isla de Mara, and bothered more than anything else by the fact that he’s got no idea how to insult Godzilla.)

The Glorious Resurrection of Bouvet Island (AO3) (Rodan perspective; instead of going home, they stopped on what was supposed to be a tiny volcanic island but is actually a glacier on a dead caldera. Rodan wakes the volcano up, passes out from the cold, and is rewarded with the tenderest of cuddles.)

A Bird in the Hand (AO3) (Ghidorah, San’s perspective; San’s slowly starting to catch up with Ichi in developing a crush on Rodan. Unfortunately, it’s because Rodan reminds him of Gigan.)

Mafic (AO3) (Ghidorah & Rodan’s perspectives; during the flight home to Isla de Mara, Rodan decides it’s absolutely crucial he teach Ghidorah about which lava tastes best.)

No Tongue, No Teeth (AO3) (human & Rodan perspectives; Rodan decides that if he and Ghidorah are courting, then he needs to explain how courting works in his species—and meanwhile nearby Monarch employees are desperate to know what they’re talking about.)

You Made That? (AO3) (Rodan & Ghidorah perspectives; Rodan makes a globe to help teach his alien guests about Earth’s landmarks; Ghidorah makes a radio to find out what the hell humans are up to. They’re very impressed by each other’s works. Also Ghidorah thinks the globe is a courting gift and absconds with it.)

The weight of the world on your shoulders (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective(s); after a long delay, they finally take an official vote to see if all three of them agree that they want to stay on earth with Rodan.)

Volcán [Scene 1] (Rodan’s perspective; how Rodan finally falls in love with Ghidorah: in song and dance. Note: all the scenes are in one post so it’s only linked once, but each scene is listed separately on this list based on where they fall in the chronology.)

Day Tripping on the Ring of Fire (AO3) (Rodan & Mothra’s perspectives; Rodan teaches Ghidorah to navigate the Ring of Fire, and decides they need more friends. Mothra would be a great buddy for them. Right? Right.)

Volcán [Scene 2] (Rodan’s perspective; how Rodan finally falls in love with Ghidorah: in song and dance.)

Just a Flesh Wound (Rodan’s perspective: Rodan comes home after a fight. Ghidorah’s prepared to murder whatever injured him.)

Gold Skin, Black Blood, and Stone Bones (Rodan, Ghidorah, & Xilien perspectives: 60% Rodan helping a hungry Ghidorah find some edible gold, 40% flashbacks to why the Xiliens made him need gold in the first place.)

Home Is Where Your Shackles Are Anchored (Ghidorah perspective: Rodan asks Ghidorah about alien planets but only really wants to know about the volcanoes; somehow he ends up declaring Ghidorah an honorary earthling.)

Volcán [Scene 3] (Rodan’s perspective; how Rodan finally falls in love with Ghidorah: in song and dance.)

Related fics, in chronological order:

Specimen 1, Specimen 2, Specimen 3, Monster 0 (AO3) (unnamed Xilien dorat breeder; backstory, the “birth” of Ghidorah and the moment they gained the strength they’d need to escape)

STAND UP AND TRY AGAIN (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective; backstory, shortly after being “born”/made by very cruel aliens—set during the timeskip in the previous fic)

Ghidorah & Gigan Crash the Opera (Gigan’s perspective: Gigan takes Ghidorah to the opera. Things go awry, multiple times, mainly because they’re jerks.)

The Fissures Between Flesh and Metal (AO3) (Gigan’s perspective; he rambles to a bartender about his relationship with Ghidorah while he waits for a hacker to dig out the info he needs to let him follow Ghidorah across the galaxy.)

Cuckoo (AO3) (Mothra’s perspective; Godzilla’s species leaves its eggs in other species’ nests to prevent them from being predated by MUTOs. One day Mothra hatches from an egg to find a second one sitting next to her and a dead Godzilla outside her nest—and that’s how she got a brother.)

Armor & Fuzz (Battra’s perspective; what happens when one of Mothra’s eggs hatches, remembering all her past reincarnations... but he isn’t Mothra himself. Connected to Cuckoo.)

Heartbeat Heartbeat Heartbeat (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective; a random fight with Godzilla sometime before getting trapped in Antarctica)

Like Lover and Owner and Worshiper (AO3) (Ghidorah & unnamed Monarch employee; set from the time Monarch finds Ghidorah until he escapes; sleeping Ghidorah telepathically latches on to a human’s admiration. May or may not be canon to the other fics, but the description of Ghidorah’s empathic abilities IS canon across fics)

Hazard Pay (AO3) (Human perspectives; while Ghidorah is in Boston, a bunch of demolition workers find themselves on an unexpected break. ... And persuade Ghidorah to do their job for them. Set during Machine Maker Music.)

Isla de Rotten Fish (AO3) (unnamed Isla de Mara islander; the islanders coming home struggle to clean up their island. Rodan helps them out. No mention is made of Ghidorah in the fic, but otherwise can be canon to the rest of the series.)

Hybrid Cultivar (AO3) (scientist working for Jonah; while trying to cultivate Godzilla cells found in Ghidorah’s decapitated head, Dr. Shiragami instead creates an odd human/rose/Godzilla hybrid. Surely this won’t end badly.)

Monarch Flips Out (AO3) (human perspective; Monarch Outpost 56-B reacts to Rodan making a globe and Ghidorah making a radio. They didn’t know titans could do that. Set during You Made That?)

A Hundred Eggs & One Survivor (AO3) (Mothra’s perspective; Mothra wants to know why Rodan visits so often. Turns out he’s wildly projecting his personal issues onto her. Set during Day Tripping on the Ring of Fire.)

Her (Word A) and His (Word B) (AO3) (human, Ghidorah, & Rodan; Ghidorah asks a simple question and Rodan gives a baffling answer—which mainly serves to demonstrate how poorly humans, aliens, & titans can understand each other.)

The Butterfly [Dream/Effect] (Mothra & Chen family perspectives; Mothra meets with one of her shobijin lineages and discovers they’ve been searching for her for centuries.)

Violet/Violent (Dr. Shiragami perspective; Biollante’s hit plant puberty and Jonah thinks it’s time to change her from lab mascot into weapon. Sequel to Hybrid Cultivar.)

Heal Our Wounds (Serizawa perspective; Mark & Maddie visit Serizawa in the hospital; Serizawa and Mark talk about Ghidorah’s potential new place on Earth.)

I’ve started writing daily drabbles. Ones that fit in this continuity will be listed—although I’m gonna play faster and looser with precise facts & details in drabbles than I do in full fics. Listed in posting order.

Six Volcanoes (AO3) (Godzilla’s perspective; Godzilla finds his route home blocked by an island that didn’t exist a few weeks ago and a bunch of Rodans.)

Reincarnation (AO3) (Mothra’s perspective; Mothra discusses reincarnation with a Hindu woman. She’s relieved to learn humans can reincarnate.)

How to Worship Moths (AO3) (Mothra’s perspective; after coming home to Infant Island after several centuries, a local asks her about how they used to worship her.)

[N S F W] How to Have a Threesome (When You Don’t Have Any Friends) (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective(s); it’s a three-headed dragon getting himself off, idk what to tell you.)

On Second Thought, You Can Keep That Nest (AO3) (Tiamat’s perspective; another titan tries to steal Rodan’s turf. She wasn’t expecting Rodan to be a badass. Or backed up by a space dragon.)

Suffocation (AO3) (Ghidorah, San’s perspective; he used to have nightmares after being stitched together, but now being awake feels the same.)

Discount Apocalypses (AO3) (Ghidorah’s perspective(s); the bar fight where they met Gigan.)

Subaquatic Shortcuts (AO3) (Godzilla’s perspective; Manda is very distressed he can’t win a race against Godzilla.)

Sooner or later these will all be cross-posted to my AO3. I take writing requests and tips on Ko-fi.

#king ghidorah #ghidorah #rodan #rodorah #godzilla #fanfic #my writing #spoilers #(god im gonna hate myself when i make time to crosspost these to ao3 there's over a dozen)#(edit: i'm making time to crosspost these to ao3 and i hate myself)

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onebadwinter · 5 years ago

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Name: Unknown (For my personal portrayal his real name will be: Nicholai Albin Etzel)

Meaning of Name: Nicholai: Victorious; conqueror of the people. Albin: White, bright. Etzel: Noble One. Nickname(s): Jack Napier, The Joker, The Clown Prince of Crime, The Harlequin of Hate, The Red Hood, Domino Killer, Ace of Knaves, Gravedigger, Oberon Sexton, Jerome and Jeremiah Valeska, The Fool, Public Enemy #1, Mr. Rekoj, Nemesis of The Knight, The Bandit, Mr. Face Paint, Patient 0, Patient 223, Joe White, Jocund Jack of Jocund Jack of All Crimes, Eric Border, One The Clown at Midnight, Joseph Kerr, The Pale Man, Ivar Loxias, Liam Distal, John Doe And whatever else he feels like, bitch.

Age: Unknown, between 20-40 years old. Depends.

Birthday: Unknown, Theorized to be on April 25th(1940*Winkwonk*), April 1st, July 11th, August 1st ( My Portrayal will be on: May 25)

Species/Nationality: Human/Altered, Slavic, French, German, American

Accent: Posh English, with hints of a mixture of others as undertones. Or you know, whatever fucking accent he wants to have that day. You know?

Language spoken: English, Old Prussian, Romanian, Italian, American Sign Language, German, French, Spanish,

Powers/Abilities: Resistance to Pain, Mister Mxyzptlk's Powers, Black-Ops Training, Fearlessness, Genre Awareness(Fourth Wall), Immune to Poison, Poisonous Blood, Escapology, Super Sanity(Fourth Wall), Trained Tactician, Shape Shifting, Good Timing, Genius Level Intelligence, Enhance Mutation, Disguise Mastery, Adaptive, Marksmanship, Agility, Stealth Mastery, Immortality, Unarmed Combat, Science Manipulation(Mastery), Regeneration, Mechanical (Mastery), Fourth Wall Breaking, Animal Handling, Weapon Master, Narrator,

Pet: Technically, none. One could say. But Three Hyena’s through Harley Quinn named Bud and Lou.

Illness/Allergies: Super Sanity, Severe Chemical Imbalances, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Facial Nerves are Paralyzed,

Occupation: Chemical and Mechanical Engineer/Comedian,

Faceclaim: Jared Leto/Cameron Monaghan,

Description: Unaltered by being kicked into a vat of chemicals, Nicholai looks just like any normal person. Black or Dark Brown hair, a normal skin color and complexion. Blue eyes some piercing scars on his ears, no tattoos. His looks after being chemically altered are roughly the same, his eyes change to green, his hair as well. His skin becomes a sleek ivory/grayish color. He starts wearing make up to exacerbate the darkness around his eyes and the color of his lips. His nose is normal length and size in both his normal and altered phase. Facial scars and red lips. He has EYEBROWS lol.

Outfit/Accessories/Jewelry: TBD

Height: 5′10″-6′5″

Weight: 140

Body Build: Slender/Athletic

Backstory/Background:

Nicholai is born to a father who had moved from Russia to France two years prior to Nicholai's birth. Nine or so months before he had met Nicholai's mother. The pair had conceived Nicholai during a one night stand together. After which, Nicholai moved to America, not knowing she had been pregnant then. Nine months later Nicholai had been born on May twenty-fifth, this incident lead to his mother and father ultimately hooking up for good thinking that it would be best for their son, rather getting together our of something as silly as 'love'. Throughout the following years however, it became a point of contention for the family of three. By the time Nicholai had been old enough to begin remember things, his father had taken to drinking excessively as well as flying into fits of rage upon the stresses of life trying to provide for his family. His then wife taking the brunt of many of these rage induced attacks. But often enough the trickle down had landed Nicholai in his fathers sights. Who would hit, yell at, or lock him in a small container for hours at a time.

By the time Nicholai had started school his father had lessened on the hitting part of the abuse toward his son but where that aspect had been lessened, the less obvious ones had heightened. However, Nicholai had still proven himself a very intelligent young boy. Getting praise from his teachers usually and suggestions to his parents to put him in gifted programs, noting that even for a boy so young he had seemed to be very intelligent. His father had refused to place him in such programs however, claiming that it would only get his boy bullied in school and make him into a freak. This, Nicholai had thought, was one thing he had liked that his father had done for him. As he also did not want to go to any of the gifted classes at that time either. As well, Nicholai's mother was very doting, often times it seemed she had taken on the burden to love Nicholai enough for both her and his father's concerning lack of love toward his son. It had often felt smothering to the young boy, now worried she would be and how nervous she had often made him feel growing up. It instilled in him a sense that he was in constant danger.

Nicholai had found it hard to make and keep friends while going to school. He often talked in a strange way that none of the other kids quite caught on to. He was also clearly smarter than all the other kids too, vastly smarter and so the conversations and play time had seemed challenging to Nicholai as he often felt he had needed to dumb himself down in order to enjoy these moments with the other children. Something he didn't really want to do. But, giving in a little, he started to clown around during classes, playing little tricks on others or showing off little tricks from childish inventions he would make on show and tell days. It was during one of these days where his parents had requested his parents switch him over to a private school that would be more suitable for him. Caving in, his father agreed, once he was told that he would not have to pay for this scholarship. So, Nicholai had to restart again, trying to make friends. Only this time, the children were not so easily amused by his tricks and toys.

The children at his new school were the children of very important, powerful or rich families in all of Gotham and some of the surrounding areas. Nicholai was new, and vastly different from all of the other children around him now, and like blood in the water of a bunch of hungry Sharks, a lot of the children could tell he was not one of them. So they ignored him most of the time. One day, another day of show and tell Nicholai had brought a frog to class, showing it off and letting it hop around the floor in front of him. He had been absolutely proud of the little toy he had made. Though none of the other children had seemed impressed. One raised their hand, and Nicholai had them ask their question. It was a rather innocent one, he thought, could the frog do anything else but hop. Nicholai had smiled at the other child before moving to pick the frog up and bring it toward the girls desk and telling her to stick her hand into the frogs mouth. Which she did, and the frog spit up some slime onto her hand. She was thoroughly disgusted but it did get a lough out of one other boy, a tame one, but a laugh.

Nicholai had looked over toward the dark haired boy sitting several desks away and watching as they tried to hid their giggling and go back to a more serious state. Looking away he brought his frog back and took most of the goop back as he moved back to his seat at the teachers behest. Later that day Nicholai had learned that the boy who laughed was Bruce Wayne, of all people. A Wayne. He could not believe he had made a Wayne laugh at something so simple! However, he could not get this boy to give him all that much attention. No matter what he had tried the other seemed distant from him, and everyone else. Away in his own world, it had seemed. Nicholai had eventually given up and looked elsewhere for friendship. As he was doing so, his father had again picked up beating him physically. This time making sure he kept quiet and to not hit the boy anywhere anyone might see. That was until one night he had managed to hit Nicholai so hard that Nicholai had need to go to the clinic to get healed. He was to stay their several nights.

This had not made his father happy, but Nicholai knew he would at least have a few days of sanity before going back home. There he had met Martha Wayne, Bruce Wayne's mother. Who, for some reason was there. She had come up to him and asked if he had gone to school with her son, then asked if he had been the boy with the toy frog. The reason for her asking this was because just a moment before Nicholai had been working on the toy frog in question while sitting in his bed resting. Then Martha had asked if he knew her son Bruce Wayne, Nicholai had confessed to the older woman that him and Bruce had not met yet. Martha seemed to look a bit desperate then, and asked if he would like to come over for a play date sometime that week, as she would love for her Bruce to make a friend, and Bruce had talked a lot about a boy who built a toy frog, with her. Martha had even tried to sugar coat her offer by bringing up that it would 'get him out of his house' for a couple of hours, daily, if the boys play date went well enough.

With that offer she told him she was going to go and that she would come talk to him later on and let him rest as he thought about the proposal to be her sons friend. Nicholai wasn't going to say no. Because he had also been wanting a friend for a long time too, and something about Bruce had told him that they could be very great friends. Over the next couple of days Nicholai had healed up and enjoyed the peace of the clinic, still not having seen Martha since her request to him. His mother had left fifteen minutes earlier to go grab him something to eat at a local store, for lunch. However, an alarm going off had set the entire peaceful setting of the hospital into almost complete chaos. The lights had gone off, and Nicholai had to cover his ears upon hearing popping noises very close by. What he could only assume were the sounds of some sort of gun or something similar. Being just a young boy he couldn't tell, of course. Moving quickly he tried to get to his door before a man stepped in front of it. Then asked 'what he had here'.

The look in the mans eyes had told Nicholai to run, to get away from the man turning he tried darting for the other side of the room, but the much larger, stronger, and faster older man was too quick. Grabbing Nicholai by his left wrist and jerking the child closer, their arms had wrapped around Nicholai before he was being forcibly carried out of the room and down the hallway. Screaming for the man to let him go and all other sorts of things as he squirmed to try and break free, seeing several people working at the clinic being shouted at by either the man carrying him, or any of the men that were with him, before getting shot when they didn't tell the man what he had wanted to know. Nicholai had witnessed the majority of the incident take place, right toward it's conclusion where he had ultimately been kidnapped by the gang as they rushed to leave the hospital with whatever they had been there to do, being done. For several months or so afterword Nicholai was subjected to many forms of abuse from the gang, of even the most sadistic of natures.

Then, just like that, they had let him go, as if nothing had even happened. Even dropping him off back home. His mother was in tears about his return, happy he wasn't dead in a ditch somewhere like most other children. Nicholai's father however, greeted him with a smack to the back of the head and a comment on how stupid could he be to get himself kidnapped. Along with many other cruel things. Nicholai had gone to therapy after this for several weeks. When it was concluded that he had more or less blacked out MOST if not all of what had happened to his time in captivity. His mother was told to give him some pills that would help keep the memories locked away and eventually he would totally forget about them. After a month Nicholai had returned back to school as if nothing had happened, a few kids asked where he had been all this time, but for the life of him he couldn't really remember. In time life did move on as usual, Nicholai returned back to his school work, focusing a lot more on that than in making friends, even though he would have stilled liked to have had them.

A couple of years passed without incident, Bruce and Nicholai never got the chance to have their play date. Martha had asked more often when seeing Nicholai, how he had been feeling, rather than bringing up play dates. However, a incident happened one day after a night out at the movie. Nicholai was across the street from the movie theater as he waited for his father to finish up some business he had to do. Looking out toward the lights of the theater, Nicholai sighed. He wished his father wouldn't bring him along for these sort of things, but his father had said one day he might have to learn the 'trade' in order to support himself and his family. Nicholai didn't think being a criminal was worth it. Though as he sat in the car he mused about his future, imagining himself most often telling jokes to a large crowd of people. The thought of people laughing at his jokes was much more alluring to him. Smiling he continued to look toward the lights, then toward the many people leaving the theater, their he had spotted a couple of familiar faces exiting later in the evening followed by those all too familiar popping noises. Ducking down, Nicholai had covered his ears, the sounds stirring in him a uncharacteristic response for him, absolute uncaring numbness.

With his body trembling he moved his hands from his ears and wrapped them around himself as he listened to the shouting, both Bruce's, he could tell and the people gathering around. His father had come to the car and climbed in looking toward the back where he had left Nicholai, seeing his son was there the man had started the car quickly before speeding off. Nicholai sat up, looking back toward the scene as police were arriving. He then looked toward his father as the other tossed a few items into the passenger seat. Nicholai had crossed his arms over his stomach, before commenting that Gotham's criminal side was growing out of control. Nicholai had noticed that Gotham had a very high crime rate some time ago, and with each year it got worse. The next day at school, Bruce was of course not there. It seemed that the Wayne's were gunned down, the news had been nonstop talking about it since the incident happened. Bruce was now an orphan, left to be raised by his butler all alone in the mansion on a creepy side of the city.

Years had passed after that, Nicholai continued to work on his studies, eventually growing an interest in chemicals. By this time he was in middle school and starting into a phase some might have called his punk phase. In this phase he got really into piercings and wearing fake tattoos for a while, before eventually switching to other phases. You know, as a person finding themselves is one to do. Nicholai eventually settled on all of them, because he became a big fan of having multiple choices. Also during this time he met a young blond girl who was a bit of a spoiled brat, but he never quite got her name, something to do with a motorcycle or something of the sort, was all he could remember. The reason for this is because at some point in middle school he had moved up a few grades, having taken on the programs that would allow him to skip grades and graduate from school earlier than others. From time to time for a while he would even see Bruce Wayne here and there, but the two had, by that point in time moved on with their own separate lives. He had heard some rumors that Bruce had gotten very aggressive since his parents deaths.

Nicholai continued with his school work, excelling and eventually he had met the young girl who would in some years time become his wife. By this time in his life he had been sixteen years old and helping his father with some odd petty theft jobs here and their to help support his family. His plate was full, but he hadn't minded it all too much. Still he found himself wishing to become a comedian, that way he didn't need to work so hard anymore. He and Jeannie had become quite close and were absolutely enamored with themselves. He had truly fallen in love with her, and he couldn't imagine any good future without her in it. In time he had graduated early from high school and moved on to college, Jeannie and Nicholai had remained close even as he had to go away for college. Four years later he had graduated and taken a job offer to work as a chemical engineer in a plant in Gotham, by this time in his life he had long stopped helping his father do petty thieving jobs and decided to move on from that life and move Jeannie to a decent part of the city.

About a year after moving out of his parents his father had been murdered by someone in the crime world. Nicholai had ignored the majority of it, not wanting to know what had happened and quietly laid his father to rest without looking into the death any further. About two years after his mother had also gotten in a horrific car accident that had left her in a coma where eventually Nicholai had to give the order to take her off life support. Jeannie had supported and taken care of him through all of it, showing him that she had loved him just as much as he loved her. Eventually they talked about having a child together, starting their own family. In this time Nicholai continued to work as a chemist and work with the plant, however, his dreams of being a comedian had not waned. So one night, he went to Jeannie and asked her opinion. She had encouraged him to do what made him happy. Sure that he could always go back to the plant if things didn't go well. After hearing her opinion he decided to take the chance, he could live with a chance to do something he had always wanted to do.

Though about a year or so into his attempt the pair had fallen onto hard times, Jeannie was nearly nine months or so pregnant at the time and had decided to raise some concerns about money. Eventually she told Nicholai that he should think about returning to his job at the plant. Nicholai sighed, agreeing at first but remembered his connections with the criminal world. One night after his acts he went around asking about little bits of information for some hits on a few houses, petty thievery was something the Gotham police barely even bat an eye at half the time, he knew he could make some quick cash this way to both support his dream career and wife and child with a few marks here and there. Nicholai had failed to find anything however and retreated back home. It wasn't until a few weeks later when two familiar goons he had known came around his house, and mentioned in front of Jeannie that they had some jobs for him. She of course was not happy about it, Nicholai could tell. But he knew from his time in childhood that it wasn't something to be so worried about.

Trying to assure Jeannie that everything would be okay, he would do some odd jobs for the men and their gang here and there in order to support them until he made some headway, he was sure he was close to breaking into the business of comedy in no time. As people who were fame hungry usually thought before ending up homeless on the streets of California shooting up through their toes and shitting on sidewalks. Nicholai agreed to take on the odd job the two men were offering. Looking toward the red hood they had brought along with them. He wasn't so sure what the point of it was to continue the sideshow, but he knew the routine. Eventually donning the hood and costume while committing the petty thefts. However this had only served to bring him more attention than he would have liked. Again and again the news would report on the 'Red Hood' and it was just growing more and more popular. Eventually Nicholai had decided to tell his new bosses that he wanted out, that the risk was too high now and he decided he would go back to work in chemical engineering.

Jeannie had been more than thrilled to hear about this, however, the gang he was working for had not been, at all. Nicholai told Jeannie he would not do any more jobs, and he would work a legitimate job to support her and their child. It had seemed to take a lot of stress off Jeannie's shoulders that he only then had just realized was effecting his wife, the woman he would claim was his soul mate if he had even believed in such a thing. It made him feel ashamed for having been so selfish and put her through something like that. A few nights later, however, the two men had come back to their home one night. Again, the suggested a job to Nicholai, which Nicholai had turned down. But this time, they weren't asking him to do it, they were telling him to do it. Or they would expose him as the red hood to the entire city and he would be locked up and never even see his child or wife again. Jeannie had told him it was alright, to take the final job and then they could move on with their lives. Nicholai wanted to protest, knowing how this worked for criminals, having grown up around it.

But seeing his wife's worry had returned and being concerned for his unborn child he agreed, not wanting his wife to become stressed this close to having their child he told the men he would take on this last final job for them and then asked where it would be. They had said it would be at the plan, where he had worked. They had known, and knew he would be perfect for this particular job. Oh, they had assured him that it would be the last job. They prooomised she would be save and they could move on with their lives. Then they told him where to meet them the next day. After they left Nicholai had hugged his wife, apologizing to her for being so stupid and allowing this entire thing to happen and get this far. Before then kneeling and holding her stomach, cooing at it a bit and telling his child that he was going to fix it, he promised. Then he stood and helped his wife to bed. The next day he had met the men at the spot they had instructed, just before sun down they had arrived and handed him the suit. Nicholai put it on, reluctantly.

Some time later they were breaking into the plant and making their way to the destination point where they would be retrieving their package. However as they were leaving a pair of glowing eyes from the darkness had them stopping in their tracts. It was The Batman, as the other two men had probably said. Nicholai thought he was hearing them right anyway. Batman, what a silly name for a superhero, he thought. Of course he had heard of the thing before, everyone knew about Batman by now. The guy was running around like a chicken with his head cut off bringing justice all over the city. Batman was a big reason for Nicholai to want to stop before it got this far. However, it was too late for that now. Taking off he managed to dodge Batman’s attempts to stop him and leave the other guys behind. Which had at least given him some time to come to terms with his life as he knew it changing forever. He was going to prison, no doubt about that. How was he going to explain to the police that he had willingly chosen to commit all those crimes, except for this one time. This one time he didn't want to do it that meddling Batman had caught him.

It was a poor excuse and now the false floor was breaking underneath him. Bolting toward the chemicals he runs onto one of the bridges only for Batman to drop right in front of him. As the man yelled at him to stop Nicholai turned and darted the other way, still carrying the package. Taking another bridge he runs across only to get his arm sliced by something the other male threw at him. He was definitely not going to beat this guy, and he knew that. But he was also not going to give up, he was going to get out of there and get back to his wife. At least he would have liked to think that's how it all worked out. However Batman eventually catches up to him and kicks him over the side of the bridge and down toward the vats of chemicals. Landing on the concrete floor, hard, he was sure he broke something then. Pushing himself up he continued to try and flee. Batman dropping behind him and holding up something. Nicholai turned down toward one row of chemical filled vats, surely thinking that Batman wasn't stupid enough to throw anything that might break any of the vats-

And oh would you look at that. Batman decided to blow it all up. This caused the vats to break apart and spill their contents out all over the place, sending the chemical waste splashing all over Nicholai. Batman was fine though, he just zipped on out of their, as you do when your a millionaire dressed up like a bat and it's not Halloween. Anyway, back to the backstory. So Nicholai was washed away with some chemicals and somehow went down the drain and out into the sewers where he continued to be contaminated and horrifically mutated into what everyone would later come to know as The Joker. Eventually getting spit out of the sewers and into some nice fresh air and your normal every day dirty muddy water Nicholai lay on that cool mud as his body continued to change, smoke rising from his now overheating form. Then, eventually, it all stopped. The world had stopped spinning, the heat no longer bothered him, everything just stopped and then went black. At some point he woke up to the moon overhead, lighting up the entire area around him.

Nicholai eventually got up not noticing at first what had happened to him. Moving toward the water he tore the hood off his head and tossed to the side angrily, ripping away at the rest of the suit he was wearing, wanting nothing more to do with it or the gang. He hoped that them along with Batman had thought of him to be dead. Hearing a noise when he did this he could only think of it as clicking, constant clicking noises. Nicholai eventually noticed that he had changed and this had caused him to go into a fit of giggles. Eventually he had made his way back to the city and to his home only to find it had burned to the ground. Dropping onto the ground, Nicholai laughed even louder then he had back at the drainage pool he woke up by. Eventually he would come to learn that his wife and unborn child had died from a short circuit. From that point on the man known as Nicholai had stopped existing.

Some years later the man known as The Joker and a million other alias' by this point in his life had been sitting in a chair waiting to meet his newest psychiatrist and begin the game again. He had taken to scaring most if not all of his previous psychiatrists away. One day a young girl with long blonde hair and big bright blue eyes, wearing glasses had come into the room. From what he could tell, she was just out of college. Not like the old coots he had put up with before her. Or the staff he had to deal with any other time while at Arkham Asylum. So the Joker did what he did best, when he began the game. When he wasn't running his criminal empire directly. When he was 'calm'. He talked to her. Teased her and befriended her. It was easy. It was easy because he could see in her what someone he once knew had been like. Without a friend in the world, that yearning. Then there was the look of an animal who had been locked in a cage. He could see it all in this girl. Each day he would win her over, more and more.

Many would say that he had manipulated her. That he used her and turned her from good to bad. But He had only freed her. She just needed that extra...push. Everything else about her was there all along, scratching at the floorboards, waiting, wanting to be freed. Joker had the key, only him. Because it was only her that needed the freedom he could provide. Then one day, with the cage door open she had come to him, it had been the first of April, if he would later remember right. She was excited, because she knew what crimes she was committing as she walked those halls, key in hand, stabbing guards and other staff in the throats with needles filled with...who knew what. With a smirk on his face he had taken the young woman's hand and let her drag him through the facility to their get away car. The woman had taken her new freedom to such an extreme level, another fit of giggles had rocked Joker as he watched her chaotic bursts of energy and her decisions based on a whim. She was hair brained. Then she turned to him, she said, she would be called Harley Quinn from that day forward.

So she was, Harley Quinn, from that day forward, and he was hers. Joker smirked however, not showing the same kind of attachment to her. The days went on like that, till it came time. She wanted to commit to him entirely, all of her. During a drive she stopped at the chemical plant, reminding him of the time he had told her in a session they had, when it came to questions about his odd inhuman features. He told her he took a swim in one of the chemical vats at the plant. It wasn't exactly the truth. But it was clearly something she had fixated on and she herself had decided that she would also, take a chemical bath. Joker didn't stop her, of course. Why would he. He was curious about what would happen to her. So into the plant they went and he watched her amp herself up to jump. With a little prodding he asked her if she would die for him. Harley exclaimed a yes, still working up her nerve. Then he asked her if she would live for him. This had seemed to stump her for a moment. Then a serious look came over her face, she said yes and ran toward the vat, leaping from the ledge and dropping down into the pool of chemicals.

Joker thought that she might have been dead, then. He was just about to leave but, suddenly, he had stopped himself and turned back before jumping back in after her. Plunging into the chemicals and grabbing onto her. Rising out of the waste he lift her unconscious body up from the liquids. Then opened her airways, chemicals had dripped off his dark green hair that half clung to his face. Staring at her that day, something old and familiar to him stirred, if only for a moment. He thought for a moment he might have cared about this woman. As impossible as it would seem to him, something had told him he could let her die, that he wanted to keep her. Dragging her out of the liquids he gets himself and her out of the plant and back toward their car where he sped off into the night.

Some nights later Joker took her too get some pets. She had wanted them after waking up, and though he really didn't want any on his own. Again the feeling, small yet familiar had hit him. He caved, taking her to get three baby Hyena's in the black market. Joker didn't pay them much mind, but they had made Harley very happy, and sometimes he found himself amused by this before going back to ignoring them again as he worked on his plans to deal with Batman. Sometimes Harley would be more than annoying with her need for attention, however. Which had grated on his patience as time had gone. His prior attempts to get her to leave him alone was often ignored. But he did cave and eventually find that hitting her or threatening her silenced her up real good. So he went with that option instead of being rational. Because why not, he's not a saint, and the man he used to be was no longer their. That man was dead, he was The Joker now, and who was she, getting on his nerves half the time. Almost, he had noticed, intentionally.

That is how life had gone on for many years, him and Batman playing their game back and forth. Harley being a third wheel, but every so often he would show her how he felt, even if she had annoyed him a lot. He had secretly loved her, too. But after about forty minutes he would abandoned her to get back to his game with Batman, starting the cycle again. At some point he had those Hyena’s of His and Harley’s eat Salvatore Guzzo alive.

(Work In Progress)

Personality: Daring, Unpredictable, Changeable, Lack of empathy, Unconcerned, Lacks a conscience, Apparent insanity, Leader, Joker, Humorous, Adaptable, Sensor, Self Evaluation, Meditative, Mischievous, Murderous, Unreliable, Sadist, Believes he cannot be saved, Aware of himself and others and how he effects them, Seemingly Illogical Nature, Asexual/Sexual, Manipulative, Private, Uninterested in Sexual Relationships, Hyper Fixating, Capable of romantic relationships, Nonreciprocating, Uncaring, Abusive, Lover, Physical, Melancholic, Obnoxious, Fighter, Abused, Chiding, Hardworking, Egomaniac, Grandiose, Nontraditional Romantic (With Batman), Urbane, Wishes to make Batman the best he can be, Chaotic, Defines his existence through conflicts with Batman, Does not care about Batman’s real identity, Disturbing, Complex, Doesn’t want to kill Batman, Repressed, He only wishes to continue playing his game with Batman, Steely, Glamorous, Determined, doesn’t want money or power, Can express remorse when in a certain state of mind, Faithful

Quirks/Savvies/Other: Tech, Science, Combat,

Likes:

Dislikes:

Fears: None

Personality Tests: The Challenger, The Enthusiast, The Peacemaker, ENTP, 8w7, The Nonconformist, Hufflepuff, Slytherpuff, Thunderbird, Thunder Serpent,

Other: Gemini, Tropes (Part 2),

Spouses: Jeannie (Dead),

Children: Unborn Child (Son/Dead), Second child

Significant Other: Harley Quinn,

Parent(s):

-> Father: Unknown (Dead)

-> Mother: Unknown (Dead)

Sibling(s): Unknown

Starters

Chat’s

Para’s

Face

Stuff

Information

Asks

All

Alternate Universes

Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy AU

There are TWO Harley’s AU

There are FOUR Joker’s AU

The Joker’s are TWINS AU

The one where The Joker does NOT become The Joker AU

The Joker is one of the Good Guys AU

The Joker is related to Batman AU

Star Wars Joker AU

Beelzebub AU

#Joker #DC Comics #DCEU #The Joker #Roleplay #TheJokerBio #Bios #Canon Influenced

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fyeahbecachloe · 6 years ago

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it’s the way you smile, baby (when you’ve got me on my knees) 1/1

Beca/Chloe Rating: E (read tags for content) Word Count: 2774 Summary: Somehow Beca knew she would end up on her knees tonight in front of Chloe before they even left the house.

READ ON AO3

Beca hears the soft thud of Chloe’s head lightly hitting the door she’s leaning against. She looks up from her position on the floor and watches Chloe, eyes closed, mouth slightly open, and her hand tugging just short of hard in Beca’s hair. Beca whimpers and returns to her task at hand, closing her mouth around the head of the toy as she continues to bob her head up and down. Beca grips the length of the silicone and pushes in tandem with her mouth and the end inside of Chloe hits just the right spot with each stroke.

Chloe’s eyes fly open at a particularly hard push and looks down at Beca. “You’re doing so good, baby,” she says softly. Beca almost doesn’t hear her over the sound of the music from the party. The base reverberates against the door. She can hear Chloe’s breathing getting more erratic and the hand in her hair grips harder. “Such a good girl.” Chloe’s voice is now low and raspy and her hand moves Beca’s head, subtly guiding her.

Somehow Beca knew she would end up on her knees tonight in front of Chloe before they even left the house. She knew the second Chloe took one look at the outfit she was wearing that it would be another one of their “sexcapades” as Chloe annoyingly titled them. They liked to play these games in public whether it’d be during a Bellas’ night, a movie theater, or that one time they were on a ferris wheel. Beca honestly thought she was going to die that night.

Beca loved everything about it. The teasing. The risk of being caught. The way Chloe always took charge. Chloe was usually the bigger risk taker, proving it more tonight. When she saw Beca all ready to leave for the party in that red plaid skirt she loved so much, Chloe quickly went back to her room and came out in an entirely different outfit.

Beca raised an eyebrow taking in Chloe’s change of clothes: looser fitting jeans and an oversized long shirt that hung off her shoulder.

“What’s with the wardrobe change?” Beca asked as they joined the rest of the Bellas on the way out.

Chloe took her hand and winked. “You’ll see.”

Beca’s entire body flushed. She could only guess what Chloe meant but knowing her girlfriend, Beca knew the night would be interesting.

The party was already in full swing by the time they arrived. Some fraternity or sorority Beca couldn’t remember the name of (“Chai Apple Pie?”) celebrating the end of finals or one of their brothers finally growing a beard. Something irrelevant to Beca but the Bellas were bored so they all went. There was crappy beer, even crappier music, but she was with her girls and Chloe so Beca didn’t mind. Plus, she knew if she behaved (Chloe’s words), she’d be rewarded.

It didn’t take long for Beca to loosen up after she drank the jiggle juice Chloe had placed in her hand. It was fruity but she knew the alcohol content level was more than half. She didn’t mind because Chloe was now pressed up behind her swaying their hips to the loud base of whatever top 40 song was coming from the speakers.

“You look so sexy,” Chloe breathed in her ear. “I love this skirt.” Her hands held onto Beca’s waist as she pulled her into her hips. That’s when Beca felt it.

“Chloe…” Beca’s mouth went dry and she swallowed trying to find her voice. “Is that?”

Chloe smiled against her ear and pulled her harder against the front of her jeans. “Yes, your favorite too.”

Beca let out a moan that was drowned out by the music and the next thing she knew, she was being dragged to nearest room with a lock (the only bathroom on the first floor) and was on her knees undoing Chloe’s jeans.

Beca can tell Chloe was close by the way she kept thrusting the dildo into her mouth so she grips it tighter and pushes it the way Chloe likes it.

“Bec,” she gasps and thrusts a little rougher into Beca’s mouth. “That feels so good.”

Beca moans again and is made painfully aware how uncomfortably damp her underwear has gotten. She hasn’t had any relief since they had barricaded themselves in the bathroom so her unoccupied hand slides under her skirt. Beca is about to push her underwear aside when a sharp tug of her hair causes her look up at Chloe’s warning eyes.

“Did I say you can touch yourself?” Chloe stills her hips and Beca releases the dildo with a wet pop.

“Baby please,” Beca begs. “I’m so wet.” She subtly tries to rub her thighs together to alleviate some of the pressure but Chloe shoots her with a pointed look and she immediately stops.

Smiling, Chloe runs her fingers soothingly through Beca’s hair. “You know I’ll take care of you but you have to be good, baby.”

“I’m always good,” Beca replies petulantly. Then with a smirk she takes the toy and pushes just so causing Chloe to suck in a shallow breath. “You know how good.”

Chloe grabs a hold of the dildo and guides the head back into Beca’s mouth. “Then finish sucking me off.”

Beca wastes no time and takes it back, sucking and stroking it hard into Chloe until she comes with a quiet moan. It was surprising to find how quiet Chloe was when they had sex while the sounds Beca made echoed throughout the entire Bella house. More than once Chloe had to stifle Beca’s loud moans with her hand.

Both are breathing heavy and Beca keeps her hand in a tight grip on her thigh over her skirt, waiting. After a few moments, Chloe catches her breath and helps Beca off her knees and pulls her into a wet and messy kiss. She licks into Beca’s mouth and takes her bottom lip between her teeth, biting hard while walking them both back towards the sink. When Beca feels her back hit the edge, she is quickly turned and finds herself looking in the bathroom mirror. Her eyes meet Chloe’s in the reflection and she gulps at the look Chloe is giving her. The look that Beca is very familiar with. The look that tells her she’s about to be taken care of and thoroughly fucked.

Never breaking their gaze, Beca feels Chloe’s hands run up her thighs and bunches her skirt to her waist. Chloe’s fingers hook into the band of Beca’s underwear and pulls down the now ruined pair to her ankles. Beca doesn’t even bother holding back how loud she gets when she finally feels Chloe slide her fingers very slowly and very softly through her wet folds. She grips the edges of the sink until her knuckles turns white. Chloe circles her swollen clit with the lightest of pressure that Beca almost screams in frustration.

“Chloe…” she chokes out and turns her head towards Chloe. “Harder, please.” She pushes her hips back trying for more contact but Chloe holds her still.

“I can’t believe how wet you are from just being on your knees for me,” Chloe taunts.

Beca opens her mouth in response but the retort dies on her tongue when she finally feels the tip of the dildo run up and down her wet center. She always considered Chloe to be the dramatic one in their relationship but Beca feels like she might actually die if Chloe doesn’t fuck her soon.

“Are you ready, baby?” Chloe positions the head at her entrance and Beca feels herself clenching in anticipation.

Beca never gets a chance to answer because a loud knock and a very angry drunk voice comes through the door.

“Who the fuck is in there? Some of us would rather piss in a toilet and not on the side of the house!”

This time, Beca does let out a scream of frustration. Chloe has pulled away from her and is already cleaning up the toy with a paper towel to tuck back in her jeans.

“Coming!” Chloe says in the most nonchalant voice and Beca kind of wants to kill her for her unintentional irony. Because no, Beca was definitely not coming at the moment. She doesn’t even bother to move as Chloe rearranges her clothes and make sure she looks presentable before seeing Beca’s angry but not really angry glare. It didn’t hold much weight when her underwear was still hanging around her ankles.

Chloe laughs. “Stop pouting.” She grabs Beca’s chin and shakes it playfully before placating her with a kiss. “You know I’ll take care of you.”

Beca huffs and bends down to redress herself but Chloe stops her. With a mischievous glint in her eye, Chloe kneels down and taps on Beca’s foot.

“Up.”

“Jesus,” Beca mutters before lifting her feet one at a time so Chloe can pull her underwear through her shoes. She holds onto Chloe’s shoulders to keep her balance.

Chloe twirls her underwear around her finger in some form of a victory flag before stuffing it in her back pocket.

“You’re the actual worst,” Beca deadpans but it holds no bite. She knows she has nothing to stand on since she was currently going commando and is still very wet and unsatisfied. Now her girlfriend was pulling her out of the bathroom and back into the party (the angry frat bro shoved pass them and slammed the door) pretending like she didn’t leave her high and not so very dry.

Beca wonders just how long Chloe will make her wait before taking her back the house and making good on her promise of taking care of her. It was quite uncomfortable to be walking through a house full of drunk college boys in a skirt with no underwear. She clings close to Chloe the remainder of the time and resists the urge to beg her to take her back home. Chloe loves when she begs though. It makes the whole experience a million times sexier.

“Chloe.” Her voice comes out like a whine when Beca finally gives in after twenty minutes of Chloe mingling with almost everyone at the party. The stickiness between her thighs has become almost unbearable at this point.

Chloe ends her conversation with Chad Mcdouchebro and turns to Beca. The look of pure innocence on her face as Beca tries to keep her face passive. “Would you like to go home, Beca?”

It’s teasing and Beca almost pouts. “Please?” She leans in and whispers in Chloe’s ear. “I need to be fucked like a good girl.”

Smiling, Chloe takes a hold of Beca’s hand and brings it her to lips to kiss her knuckles. Beca’s breath hitches at the soft gesture. Even in their lust filled state, Chloe always maintains her forever sweet demeanor. She lets Chloe lead her by the hand to exit the party (finally) and Beca tries to catch the attention of one the other Bellas to let them know they were leaving.

Beca sees Stacie first (out drinking two random guys who look like they were about to pass out) and signals to her that she and Chloe were done for tonight.

“Happy humping!” Stacie yells out and then lifts her solo cup in cheers as she watches them leave through the door.

Beca doesn’t even have time to roll her eyes because by the time they hit the sidewalk outside, Chloe pretty much was dragging them all the way back to the house. The outside air was a welcome relief to Beca’s overheated body and she was very mindful of the slight breeze blowing under her skirt.

When they finally reach the house and burst open the door, Chloe pulls Beca to her for another kiss. She nips at her lip and then down to her jaw before sucking on her neck. Chloe pulls at the skin beneath her teeth making sure to leave a mark before soothing it with her tongue.

“Chloe, please,” Beca begs again. They’re still in the hallway of the house and haven’t made any move to go to either of their bedrooms and her patience was nonexistent.

Chloe pulls away from her neck. “Up,” she commands. Beca furrows her brow in confusion until she feels Chloe’s hands squeeze her ass slightly pushing upwards. “Up,” Chloe says again and Beca finally gets it.

Beca jumps and she feels Chloe’s arms lift her from under her butt. She wraps her legs around Chloe’s waist and whimpers when her bare center grazes Chloe’s stomach. Beca then wraps her arms around Chloe’s neck and gazes down at her with full blown eyes. This show of strength turning Beca on even more feeling Chloe’s strong arms flex around her body.

“You’re so fucking hot,” Beca says and bends her head down to kiss her girlfriend.

Chloe smiles against the kiss and finally makes her way to her bedroom never detaching their lips. She lays Beca onto her bed before removing all of Beca’s clothes. Beca waits not so patiently as Chloe gets rid of her own with her jeans being the last thing to go and freeing the dildo once more.

Not even saying a word, Chloe just stares at Beca as she obediently turns around to get on her hands and knees. (Beca admitted to herself a long time ago that being on her hands and knees for Chloe is her favorite position). There’s no teasing this time and she thanks whatever deity listening at the moment when Chloe finally slides the dildo into her. Beca’s scream of pleasure echoes throughout the room and she clutches at the sheets beneath her hands.

Chloe fucks her in a rough and fast pace as she pulls Beca’s hips back to her with each thrust. “Be as loud as you want, baby. No one’s home.” The headboard of the Chloe’s bed hits the wall with every thrust and they’re for sure are never getting back their deposit with the paint and drywall being cracked.

Beca’s moans get louder when Chloe reaches between her legs to rub at her swollen clit. “Fuck!” She puts her head down on the pillow and bites at it muffling her scream. She feels herself getting close with every thrust and nearly comes and when she feels a hard tug on her hair again, bringing her up from the pillow.

“Nuh uh, I wanna hear you, Beca.” She just lets out a string of incoherent words as Chloe thrusts deeper. “Are you getting close?” Beca can only nod as strong fingers rub her clit harder. She knows the other end of the dildo is also rubbing deliciously against Chloe.

“Chloe, I’m going to come,” she whimpers and then without warning, Chloe squeezes her clit hard and she’s coming. She falls forward, arms and hands giving out but Chloe doesn’t stop her thrusting and rubbing. Before she knows it, Beca comes a second time and Chloe’s name is ringing in the room. Chloe comes shortly after and she slowly pulls out before collapsing beside her girlfriend, breathing hard. Beca feels her entire body buzzing and tries to catch her own breath. She was still on her knees with her ass still obscenely in the air, too spent to move. Beca hears Chloe removing the dildo and the quiet gasps Chloe makes as she pulls it out completely makes her center twitch.

Beca finally finds the strength to arrange herself so she can lay down on the bed properly. Chloe is already pulling the blanket around them and hugs Beca from behind. She places kisses on the side of her neck and behind her ear and wraps her arm around Beca’s stomach. Beca immediately links their hands together before bringing them up to her lips to kiss Chloe’s.

“Love you,” she hears Chloe sleepily whisper.

Beca smiles. “Love you, too.”

“You were so good tonight, baby.”

“And you’re still a fucking tease-ow!” Beca rubs at her shoulder where Chloe had bit her. She shakes her head when she hears Chloe’s giggles. “So, where’s our next sexcapade gonna be?” Beca’s eyes droop close as the night’s activities finally takes its toll on her

Chloe kisses her shoulder soothing the bite before answering. “You want to come home with me during Easter?”

“We’ve already done it in your childhood bedroom, Chloe. Remember Christmas?”

She feels Chloe’s grin against her shoulder. “My parents usually make us go to Easter Sunday mass.”

“Okay?”

“I always thought it’d be fun to do it in a church.”

Beca’s eyes fly open. “Jesus fucking Christ.”

#bechloe #beca x chloe #my fics #queue

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