#I fuckin went to college for animal science. this is my central defining feature

[agent-oo-z]

Being trans in the specific way I am is so wild sometimes.

I’m not a woman, but everyone around me sees me a woman shaped. I’m like a hyena. People see my shape and go “oh that’s a type of dog!” But I am not a type of dog. I am a type of cat. Just like hyenas.

But I filled the ecological niche most often filled by a type of dog so people treated me like a dog for so long that even now, knowing I am a cat, I look at dogs doing dogs things or having dog problems and I reminisce.

I was not ever really a dog. But I was told I was a dog. I was just a tomcat-ish dog. I trusted them because they knew better. I had to be a dog because everyone said I was a dog. And then I learned that Hyenas are Feliformia and not Caniformia and I realized I was not a dog. But the people who spent my whole life telling me I was a dog and treating me like a dog just sort of never stopped. They used the right words, most of the time. But they look at me and still see a dog.

Anyways TLDR being non-binary is wild. I know I’m not a woman. But I was raised a girl. And then I grew up into a ‘woman’ before I learned I could be neither man nor woman and just be me. And I have moments where I relate with the struggles and joys of woman-ness and I find myself thinking “but I am not a woman.” Even tho I know it doesn’t matter and that’s not how it works. I just wish I could be a hyena and relate to common dog experiences without having to defend my being a cat.