#I have to get ready for work in like 15 minutes and we're only 5/8 games. I'm not going to be able to catch the end so I'm gonna have to se

[mbirnsings-71]

(49/365) HAPPY MCC DAY!!! MAY WE ALL HAVE A SILLY TIME WATCHING THE MCC-

[homelanderbutbig]

As Long As We're Together (G/T Homelander x Reader)

2538 words. Hurt/comfort and fluff. Homelander is 8 feet tall. Reader is non-descriptive. Established relationship.

Your anniversary gift exchange doesn't go exactly as planned.

Made as part of the Cozy Corner Domaystic event put together by @cozycornerevents, using prompt #11 "unexpected gifts" and prompt #29 "peace offering".

It's officially been a month since you and Homelander started dating. Your relationship is still under wraps from the spying eyes at Vought, so the two of you can't celebrate your anniversary publicly. But that won't stop you both from having a special day.

As his personal assistant, you're trailing behind him on the set for 'Dawn of The Seven', making sure he has his lines ready. It's been a pretty busy shoot, and the two of you have not had much time to yourselves.

Eventually, there's a lull in between filming. You're following him as usual, flipping through the script to keep a strict tab on the upcoming scenes, but you are confused when he suddenly halts right in front of his trailer. Looking up at him, you can see a sly grin accompanying a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Come inside for a second," he smirks, bending down at the waist to whisper into your ear. "I have a surprise for you."

"I can't honey," you mention, pulling your phone out of your pocket and tapping the screen to bring up the current time. "I need to head back to the Tower in 15 minutes, I have a meeting with your marketing team."

Leaning back up to his full height, Homelander stares down at you in disbelief. You so nonchalantly took the ground right out from under him; he wasn't expecting any resistance, especially not on your anniversary. The day he confessed his love for you.

"N-no… no. No. Blow them off, come on," he stutters with a shaky smile, doing his best to regain his composure. "Come."

"I really can't stay," you divulge. "It'll take me at least 10 minutes to make it to the Tower and to the meeting room. Can this wait until I get back?"

Your words cut through him like a knife. All he wanted to do was to prove his devotion to you, and you're refusing him this chance. Your schedules have both been so chaotic today and he doesn't want to wait any longer for his surprise, definitely not until the evening when you're both off work.

"P-please," he mumbles quietly, his voice barely sounding audible. He can't let you leave, not yet.

Despite Homelander standing a menacing eight feet tall and you only reaching his abs, he could not seem any more small to you right now. All you see is a dejected puppy with big glassy eyes, so desperate for a scrap of your undivided attention. With a sigh, you walk up to him and reach for one of his large hands, squeezing your palm around the leather of his glove.

"This won't take longer than 5 minutes?" you ask.

"Of course not," he exclaims with a toothy grin. Your simple question is enough to wash away his fears and recapture his giddy childlike energy from moments ago. "Trust me, you'll love this."

Leading you to the trailer, he opens the door to let you in first so he can watch you spot his gift on the table. Your gasp fills him elation, ravishing in the way your body chemistry changes with delight. Carefully, you climb onto one of the oversized chairs in the dining area to get a closer look at what he got for you.

In the middle of the table is a perfectly designed bouquet, composed of a red rose heart nestled in a cloud of baby's breath. Tucked in between the flowers is a note card, wishing you a happy anniversary. Homelander even signed it himself, with a little heart doodle for you alongside his name.

"Oh hun," you exhale, bringing the flower vase closer to examine them. "These are so beautiful."

As he studies your reaction, he is perplexed as to why you appear to be blinking away tears. Are you upset at his gift? He thought this was a proper anniversary present; in every romantic movie he's ever seen the gentleman always brings his special someone a bouquet of flowers.

"Is something wrong?" he ponders, kneeling down so he can be at your eye-level. You can't help but smile at his face right next to yours, and the dread in his expression over making you cry.

"No, no…" you sniffle as you dry your eyes. "I'm just… I'm just happy. Nobody's ever gotten me flowers before."

"Thank you Homelander," you state, cupping his cheeks right before kissing him. Nearly instantly, he closes his eyes and exhales deeply through his nose as he melts into your affection. He leans more into your lips, softly keening as he chases after the genuine love that he's been searching for his entire life. Your palms petting his face have him entirely enraptured, and the noises of the movie set are long gone from his ears. Right now he feels like he's in heaven with the gentleness of your fingers running along his skin. His massive frame has practically encompassed yours with how close he's getting, but you don't mind. It's something you cherish, letting him forget his size around you.

When you pull away from your kiss, you can see how pleased he is just by the serene sparkles in his blue eyes. He has one hand placed on the back of your chair while the other is resting on your lap, taking up the length of your both your thighs.

"I have to get going now," you remark while you look up at the Vought-branded clock on the trailer wall. Sadly, your five minutes are up. "But I'll be back in an hour."

"Promise you'll come back as soon as you're done?" he asks, furrowing his brows slightly. He's so proud of himself for his gift, and he hates that he has to cut his time with you short now that he's received your gratitude.

"I promise," you respond, giving him one last quick kiss before stepping out of the trailer. You wave him goodbye as you head off, unaware that he is standing solemnly at the window as he continues to watch you with his X-Ray vision even after you've left the movie set.

~~~

You end up running a bit longer than you expected, and are confounded to find that when you finally return to the movie set, Homelander is not there. Ashley tells you that he flew off from the set an hour ago without a word. But you know there's only a few places he'd run off too, and take a taxi back to Vought Tower. As you thought, you find him in his penthouse living room, staring out the window with his arms crossed behind his back. You find it a bit odd when he doesn't acknowledge you, but you enter the room anyway.

"Hey sweetie, there you are! I couldn't find you on the set," you call out cheerily, carrying a small package in your arms. "Why'd you leave?"

"You lied to me," he answers in a blunt tone.

"…What?" you utter, confused to his change in mood.

"You. Lied," he retorts sharply, cutting you off before you can infuriate him any further. He slowly turns around to advance towards you, until you are forced to crane your head straight up to see his scowling face.

"I went by the Tower, to see how your meeting went," he clarifies as he looms his expansive stature over you. "No one had seen you. You were never there."

" Well, I-" you start to say.

"You promised," he snarls, baring his teeth. "You promised me you were different. You promised that you loved me. But you don't. You don't love me. You lied, just like everyone else."

His eyes are wild with fire, not from his lasers but from the torrent of antagonism swarming his mind. He sat alone in his trailer, expecting your return. He waited and waited, until the ticking of the clock and the ringing of his ears became too much for him to handle. He sought solace in his secret companion, his reflection, who was swift to manipulate his anxieties in order to turn him against you.

Throughout your relationship, you've come to understand that Homelander values honesty above anything else. He detests when people lie to him, even moreso when they lie to save themselves from his wrath. You have never lied to him before… until today.

On your anniversary.

Why should he have expected anything less from a human, his reflection goads him. You left him alone, with the present he so thoughtfully picked out for you, going who knows where and doing who knows what. Your kind can't be relied on, not after everything humans have done to him.

You broke his trust, and now he is out for your blood. He is a god that demands sacrifice.

Regardless of his rage, you know he really isn't going to hurt you. Gazing into his furious eyes, you can still discern the lonely little boy buried deep within his psyche. His face is twitching because he's overwhelmed with conflicting emotions. He's mad at you because you made him worry. He's upset because you disappeared; he's scared because he thought he was going to lose you. And you know you that the only way to quell his ire is with the truth.

"Homelander, just… just listen please," you breathe, cautiously planning out your next words as he stares daggers straight through your being. But he does not interrupt, and waits for you to continue.

"Today is our anniversary. This is a momentous event for the both of us," you explain, fiddling with the package tucked into your arm. "I was trying to think of the perfect gift for you, especially when you already have everything. I just… I wanted to get you something special. From the heart… Here."

You lift the box up for him, which he rips from your hands with a scoff. He can't see how a stupid present would somehow make up for what he perceives to be the ultimate betrayal of his trust. However, his irritation at your gesture evaporates the second he lifts the flaps up.

Inside is a small teddy bear, with scruffy and well loved brown fur that smells so intoxicating. It smells like you.

Totally and wholly you.

The box falls unceremoniously from his hands so he can hold onto the plush toy, running his fingers along its pelt. It's so miniscule in his grasp, practically engulfed by his fingers, and yet it feels so much larger. At this moment, it feels like the only thing in the world that matters.

"That was my bear when I was a kid," you detail to him. "I slept with it every night, it meant the world to me. I had to call in some favours to have it taken out of my hometown storage and shipped so fast."

"And now I want you to have it," you smile, walking up to him to place your hand on his thigh. "I know you didn't get to have much of a childhood, so I thought you could share mine."

Whatever anger Homelander was holding onto has completely drained from his body, filling the void with intense sadness. He can't believe he so easily let his reflection turn him against you, when you didn't even do anything. This resentment he felt was for nothing, you were never plotting some nefarious human scheme against him. Instead, you were just at the post office, retrieving your teddy bear for him.

Ever since he's known you, you have always put him first. Nobody has ever treated him with as much care and love as you have.

And now he's blown it.

The tears begin to flow freely down his cheeks as he grapples with his guilt. The constriction in his chest twists a spike deeper into his heart, fearful of what is coming next. You're going to break up with him, he just knows it. You're going to realize he isn't the big tough superhero he claims to be; you'll see him for the insecure child that he really is. Any minute now, the words are coming out of your mouth. It's over, I'm leaving, I hate you, I-

"Hey, hey. It's okay, baby boy, " you say, watching as he spirals deeper into panic. Luckily, your hands pressing into his padded suit are enough to refocus his attention. When his distressed eyes turn down to your face, you spread your arms wide to signal your intentions. "Can you pick me up please?"

With a tense swallow Homelander lifts you up with one arm, holding you close to his chest. Although he does his best to not address you, he can't fight nuzzling into your hands when you start caressing his cheeks. You touch him like he's made of bone china, so delicately, that he can't help pursuing after your affection no matter how upset he feels.

"I am so, so sorry that I lied to you," you console him, wiping away his tears with your thumbs. "I never meant to hurt you. I just wanted this to be a nice surprise, like the flowers you got me."

"S-sorry… s-s-sorry," he whispers timidly as he buries his face into your shoulder in an attempt to hide from his growing shame. However, you don't let him wallow in his irrational worries.

"Sweetpea, you don't have to apologize," you reassure him. "You're entitled to your feelings too, you shouldn't beat yourself up about that."

He doesn't know how to respond to that. During his youth he was never been given any level of autonomy over himself; he was created to serve Vought, so his emotions came second. They always came second, a trivial afterthought to the importance of what he represented to the company. And yet, here you are reminding him of his humanity, of what he had taken from him. You give him encouragement that he is more than just 'The Homelander, leader of The Seven'. Deep down, your words help the isolated little boy see the light shining through his abusive upbringing. He does matter.

"Happy anniversary Homelander," you declare, hugging his big head still snuggled heavily on your shoulder. You comb your fingers through his undercut as you feel him sink further into you. "I know this one might not have gone as well as we hoped, but I know our two month anniversary will be perfect."

"P-promise?" he mutters in a hushed tone, almost as if he's trying to hide his faith in you from his reflection, whom he is concerned might be listening.

"I promise," you assert, giving him a kiss on the top of his head. "From the bottom of my heart, you and I will get through anything as long as we're together."

"T-together…" you hear him mouth weakly to himself. It's a word he's never really thought about before, but hearing it out loud brings a whole new meaning to his life. He's not alone anymore, like he was growing up in the lab. He doesn't have to face his demons all on his own. Now he has you.

And no matter what the world brings, the two of you will always be facing it side by side… together.

[luvyeni]

SEX FASHION AND GUITARS — chapter 9. five minutes until show time !

𐙚 pairings. rockstar!jaemin x stylist!reader

synopsis. l/n y/n fashion major and photographer on the side who says what she wants, na jaemin music major and lead guitar player for underground band DREAM. After yn forgets her to change her account and says something that catches the eye of jaemin she tries to ignore him — expect thanks to chenle she now works for them.

word count. 1005 words

"im here." you dragged the suitcases containing the outfits into the dressing , winter and sieun behind you holding all your extra tools. "yn they're naked." sieun said disgustingly , her face turned up. "because you have their clothes , and you're also late." chenle said. "i said get here early." he scolded.

"i know , i know , but i had a extra class i forgot about and then winter had a shift , im here now , plus its only 8:30 , the show doesn't start until 9:15." you said , pulling out all the freshly steamed outfits. "i steamed them during class." you smiled proudly. "hi guys." you finally acknowledged the half naked boys. "now let's get you boys dressed."

"okay , jeno you're good , jisoo and sieun will help you with hair and makeup." you said , he smiled. "thank you , it looks good yn , you're a beast." you laughed. "um thank you , i guess." you took a second break , waiting for the next member. "ynie." you cringed hearing the nickname. "im ready for my touch ups." haechan did a little pose. "im sure i already gave you one." you said, standing up. "im starting to think you just like when i'm touching you." you teased. "i do." he wiggled his eye brows. "can you both do that later , we're late and jaemin is missing." chenle rushed in.

"he always is , did you check a storage closet?" jisung said , handing out the microphones. "go a head , i'll make sure he get on stage in time." you said. "please hurry and find him , we have ten minutes." chenle said. "i will now go." you said , pushing them all out the door. "you all look good , i'll see you out there." you cheered. "don't worry."

it's not like you wanted to find the boy tucked away in a storage closet — doing god knows what , with god knows who , but you didn't want chenle and jisung to be anymore upset , so here you were , knocking and opening every closet in the small venue for the man. "jaemin." you shouted , his microphone in your hand. "where the hell are you?"

"you looking for me." you damn near jumped out of your pants. "jesus jaemin." you sighed. "where the hell were you." you said , looking at his disheveled look. "where does it look like princess?" he smirked. "disgusting." you muttered. "just come , chenle isn't gonna yell at me , cause you can't keep you dick in your pants." you tugged at his belt loop. "you jealous?" you scoffed. "why would i?"

"that's right, you do have haechan , right?" he said. "you seem obsessed with him." you bit back , he dryly laughed. "if you say so princess." you reached up , putting his mic on — he grabbed your wrist. "you two aren't exclusive right?" he was closer now , your noses almost touching. "that means i can do what I want to you." he whispered. "right?" you realized how secluded the place you were was.

he smirked realizing how flustered you were. "cat got your tongue princess." you pushed your hand in front of you preventing his chest from touching yours. "we still have 5 minutes left." his hands left your wrist , grabbing your belt loop. "i could still do some much in those five minutes."

you finally came to , realizing what you were here for. "yo-you have to go on stage." you said. "so will i see you after the show then? or are you leaving with him?" you were silent , he took that as your answer , smirking. "i guess next time." he said. "let's go before they think we're doing something." he finally stepped back , giving you room to finally breathe.

"fucking finally , i thought i would have to send a search party for both of you." chenle said. "where the hell were you?" you struggled to find words. "i was having trouble with my pants and she was helping , don't worry , im here now." jaemin said. "yeah two minutes late, the guys are already on stage , go." he pushed the boy. "and you." he turned to you. "winter and sieun are over there with jisung , let's go." you nodded , about to walk away , when he grabbed your hand stopping you. "yes?" he scoffed , smiling. "you think im stupid , something wrong with his belt."

"we didn't do anything , i promise." you said. "i didn't say you did , im just saying if you do , find a better lie , than his belt." he said. "and not 10 minutes before i show when i send you to look for him."

the show was amazing and the guys did well , the five of you clapping for them as they said their goodbyes , exiting the stage to the back where you guys greeted them. "you guys did great!"

"did you see me?" haechan came straight to you. "yes i did , you did good." you praised , his arms coming around your waist. "let's get out of here and go back to mines." he said. "jesus , you still have energy?" he sheepishly smiled. "jesus , just go , no one wants to see that." renjun said. "or at least go to a bathroom."

"let's go." you waved to everyone. "i'll leave the door unlocked." sieun said. "okay." you nodded. "bye everyone, good show." you took haechan by the hand, walking towards the front. "leaving?" jaemin stopped both of you. "yeah." you noticed the girl standing next to him. "have fun." he wrapped his arm around the girls shoulder. "jaemin let's go." she whined. "come hyuck." he nodded following behind you. "have fun." you looked at him , he smirked watching you walk away.

"what was that all about?" haechan said. "you and jaemin?" you turned to him. "nothing , why you jealous?" you teased , he scoffed. "no you're free to do who and whatever you want , just let me know if you do do some with him."

"why you gonna stop this with me?"

"i don't share , especially with jaemin , but i will say i will miss fucking you into the mattress."

"good thing i haven't done anything with him yet , you still can do that."

"oh trust me i am."

previous - masterlist - next

TAGLIST (CLOSED). @nominsgirl @haechansbbg @axo-l0tl @darlingz99 @hollxe1 @lostinneocity @lovebuglissas @stars4yulia @syzavxy @kgyam4 @trashx678 @jarrofkookie @fae-renjun @thisisnotjancita@irinayobitch@cloudmrk @chenlesfeetpic@iheartjayke @foxy-kitsune @kriizztin @bugcattie

©️LUVYENI

[marikosenwrites]

I NEED SOME RANPO FLUFF PLEASEEEEE

cuddling with Ranpo?? Mornings with Ranpo?? Helping him get ready for work???

Thank you I love your writing so much 😭🥰

Have a good day/night!!!

sen's notes: OKAY ANON IM GOING TO DO THIS FOR YOU I LOVE RANPO AHHHHHHHHHHHHH also thanks for the support!! imma just do morning cuddles and helping him getting ready for work which is basically everything and YEAH LETS GO (also its short)

(im getting over being lazy with writing (not really) but the fact that schools starting again and i'm too tired to do anything productive except writing on tumblr bc i love yall) also its finally not a head canon

warnings: PURE FLUFF NO ANGST (i cant 😭)

gn!reader (forsure)

ranpo edogawa

sunlight broke through the curtains attacked ranpo's eye lids, prying his eyes open. once he opened his eyes, he yelped from the brightness. "sugar, sugar, i'm blind!" ranpo cried out to your peaceful sleeping figure.

"what...ranpo, you can't become blind with nothing getting into our dorm overnight," you rub your eyes and squint them to see better. "must be the sunlight."

you stand up to walk to the curtains and close them until the light wasn't in your room anymore and only the light from the lamp remains.

"oh, much better!" he opens his eyes, finally. "sugar, can we sleep a bit more? it's only eight am, after all."

"no, ranpo, you should say, 'it's already 8,' because it's time for work." you sigh as you sit on the bedside, beside your boyfriend who was shifting back into the covers.

"pleaseee~? only 15 minutes?" ranpo pleas, his emerald eyes opening.

"fine, fine, no more than that," you said, as you went back into the covers with open arms for ranpo to cuddle into.

fifteen minutes could pass quickly, for all you know, but these minutes with ranpo seem to pass slowly. quickly, you press the 15-minute button on your phone, mentally preparing yourself in time for the shrilling alarm sound after 15 minutes.

but for this occasion, time doesn't seem to go your way. in what seemed like 5 minutes, the alarm rang and woke you and ranpo up from your peaceful sleep. "ugh...already 15 minutes?" ranpo whines, his arms and legs flailing.

"it's already 15 minutes. c'mon, your work's waiting for you to tend to it. at the very least, i'll help you get ready." ranpo's ears perked up at the idea of that.

"ooh, yay! let's do that, then," immediately, the man took his partner's hand and led them to the bathroom, where he peeled off his clothes, leaving his boxers visible.

"you said you were going to help me get ready," the raven complained.

"right, right." you grab his white dress shirt from the closet and put it on him, leaving it to him to button it up. "you're wearing your pants by yourself, though."

"aw, that was disappointing!" he says, pouting as you hand him his overcoat.

"in return, i'll shower you with kisses on your face."

"yaaaaaaaaay!"

you grab your own hoodie and sweatpants to wear, changing into them quietly as ranpo stares at you. "...what?"

"nothing," he whistles, "just looking at how...good you look. but you look good in every outfit, i know it!"

"ranpo!" your face turns red.

"where are my kisses? you promised. i even put on my own tie." ranpo angrily puts his hands on his hips, although you could tell by his tone that he was only joking to be mad.

"coming, coming~" you sigh happily as you go over to cup his cheeks and kiss him all over his face.

a kiss on the bridge of his nose, the tip, his cheeks, his forehead, his eyelids, and last but not least, his lips. the tender feeling stays on your lips and his for a few seconds, although you know that time is ticking, so you part.

"okay, i'm satisfied! but you gotta give me more when we get to the agency!" ranpo smiles as bright as the sun.

"alright, you big baby," you laugh and put on your shoes at the door, with ranpo trailing behind you and copying your actions.

"we're dropping off the bakery to get some bread, right? i haven't eaten breakfast just yet." ranpo opens the door.

"yeah, we are," you exit quickly before he can close the door on you, locking the door too.

"okay, to the bakery!"

ending notes: heyy so it's a bit short, i know, i tried my best. anyhow, i hoped you enjoyed reading!

©all banners, dividers, and stories are made by marikosenwrites and the pictures in it are from pinterest. i own none of the BUNGO STRAY DOGS/BUNGOU STRAY DOGS/文豪ストレイドッグス characters mentioned here.

[sam-loves-seb]

weekly tag wednesday thursday

super late to this but i wanted to play because these games bring me joy and i need that right now. thanks for the tags friends <3

this week - tell me about a day in the life of:

name:  sam!

age: seven and twenty

are you in school, do you work full-time, or other?  i work full time (and also overtime when i can get it)

tell me about your morning routine on a school/work day:

wake up (5:30am), get up, get dressed, go to the gym (6am), workout, go home (7am), shower, eat a leisurely breakfast, finish getting ready for the day (8:30am), drive to work, arrive at my office (9am)

what do you usually have for breakfast? usually wheat toast and butter with a tall glass of milk. sometimes i'll switch it up and buy a sleeve of plain bagels and cream cheese. sometimes i have leftover bacon and will heat that up with my breakfast too.

how many breaks do you take during the day?  3-4? i usually take one break in the mornings and walk a lap around my office (i can't sit still for so long), i get an hour for lunch, and then 1-2 more breaks in the afternoon. if we count the microbreaks i take to look at my phone and scroll for five minutes, we're talking more like 10-15 times a day

do you go straight home when you are done?  absolutely. sometimes i'll go to the grocery store or wherever on my way back, but only because once i'm home i'm not leaving my house again until tomorrow.

do you like to go out in the evening?  yeah for sure! week nights it's always a little harder, but if one of my friends texts me on a tuesday night and says "hey i'm doing [xyz] tonight, come with me" i will absolutely be there. weekends i love going out. i am an introverted extrovert at heart.

do you cook dinner or order in?  cook, but i don't make that many things. i'm okay with eating the same six meals every week, i like routine in that way

how do you entertain yourself in the evenings?  writing a lot of the time, watching tv, reading fic, reading books, physical crafts (cross stitch, crochet, making friendship bracelets)

and finally, tell me about your bedtime routine: wash my face (10pm-ish), apply my eye cream and nighttime moisturizer, brush my teeth, change into pj shorts cuz i can't sleep in pants (it gets too hot in my room), tucked into bed (10:30pm), doom scroll for a while, open ao3 (11pm), read fic until i pass out (11:30pm-1am, depends on the night)

tagging anyone who wants to play since i'm late on this one <3

[mrgan]

Pizza romana / pizza al taglio / thin pan pizza

Sometimes you feel like a pillowy, bready pan pie, something you could slice into flavorful bread sticks. Other times, you want a large, soft pizza where the toppings shine more. This is one of those: an easy, no-knead, no-sweat base for endless pizza variations. Try topping it before baking, but also after—it's an edible board, and much more.

Neven's thin pan pizza

Servings: two 10 × 14" pans (9 × 13" will also work) Time: 10 min mix + 8-12 hour proof + 5 minute shape + 3-6 hour proof + 15 minute cook

INGREDIENTS:

300 g all-purpose flour

200 g high-gluten flour (or more APF)

10 g salt

365 g water

50 g ripe-and-ready sourdough starter (yeast variation below)

20 g olive oil

DIRECTIONS:

The night before you intend to eat the pizza, do the following:

In a very large nonreactive bowl (meaning, stainless steel, glass, or plastic, but not aluminum) add the flours and the salt, and stir together. Pour the water into the middle, then add the starter to it. Using a large spatula, stir and fold the whole mess for a bit; then add the olive oil. Stir and fold some more, until it becomes a basically coherent mass and there's not a huge pool of dry flour at the bottom of the bowl. This should only take a minute; you're not trying to knead dough, you're just making the shaggy ball a little uniform.

Cover well and rest for 30 minutes to an hour. Come back to it and, using the spatula or a flexible scraper, fold the ball on itself from each side, just to bring it together a bit more. Note that it will already look smoother and more dough-like, though it'll still be rather lumpy and homely.

Cover again and rest on the counter or in another room-temperature place (between 65ºF and 75ºF) overnight, for 8-12 hours. Hot days in humid climates will take less time, and a cold winter's night might take as long as 16 hours. What you're looking for at the end of this process is a dough that's much larger than it started, light and inflated-looking, with possible surface bubbles. (If it has collapsed into the middle, then it's been overproofed; this is unlikely to happen. If it's still a dry lump, then it never proofed at all; perhaps your yeast is too old, or your room is super cold? Sorry!)

Now grab two 10 × 14" pans (9 × 13 will also work) and grease the bottoms with a small amount of butter. Even coverage matters more than opulence, so make sure it's not a thick layer of goop. We're using butter rather than oil here because it'll stop the dough from pulling back into the center of the pan.

Flour your workbench (counter or large cutting board) liberally.

Using a flexible scraper, scrape around the edge of the bowl, then pop the dough into the middle of the workbench. Cut it in half; you can eyeball this, or measure each half to ~470 g. Place one half back in the bowl.

Working gently—without crushing the dough—first flip your dough over to flour both sides of it. Now start stretching it into a rectangle about 6 x 10" in size. No need to get it perfect; just get as close as you can while keeping the dough thickness even all around. I like to reach under the sides and pull out with my fingers. You may need to flip the whole rectangle over if any of it threatens to stick to the bench. You'll want to be able to lift the whole thing easily.

Once you have it close to 2/3 the size of the pan, transfer the dough to the middle of it. Reaching under once more, stretch the sides to the edges of the pan. Dimple any thick areas of dough from above to softly push them to the side.

Repeat with the second half of the dough.

Cover again. Give this second proof 3–6 hours, depending on your room's climate. When it's ready, the dough should be slightly puffy.

From this point on, you can perhaps dimple any super-fluffy areas, but don't stretch again.

During the last 40 minutes or so of this proofing time, preheat your oven to 515ºF. Move one of the racks to the bottom third of the oven.

Top however you'd like. For a classic cheesy-marg type of thing, I would cover with sliced, shaved, or shredded aged mozzarella, then dab with tomato sauce on top. Don't forget to season with salt, and hit with a bit of olive oil.

If you're using other toppings, remember that the sides of the pan will get hotter than the middle, so place the larger toppings around the perimeter.

Bake on the bottom-third rack of the oven for 12–15 minutes, rotating halfway. Move the whole pan to a cooling rack for 2 minutes, then slide the pizza out with a large spatula or flipper onto the rack.

Top with any post-bake toppings: basil, shaved parmesan, sauce drizzles. Cool for 5 minutes before moving to a cutting board and slicing.

YOU SAID THERE'D BE A YEAST VERSION

If you're not a Sourdough Person, this is easily made with commercial yeast as well. Please make sure to use good instant yeast and store it in the fridge/freezer to prolong its shelf life; it can be used cold.

The only change you'd make is replacing the 50 g of sourdough starter with 1/4 tsp of yeast. Add it after you've stirred the flours and the salt together, before you add the water.

This means that your dough will be 50 g lighter than the above recipe. That's not an enormous difference, but you could always make it up with another 25 g each of flour and water.

The rest of the recipe should proceed the same way, including times and temperatures.

You can also scale this recipe however you'd like—making a single pan won't be much different.

[pbandjesse]

Today was kind of a logistical nightmare for me. And like it was fine in the end because we got through it but man. I hate when things are set up to fail.

I also just slept horribly last night. It was super super windy and it was just so loud and we should have just closed the windows but we didn't and so I woke up a ton. I also had really really intense nightmares. And so when I woke up I just felt so crummy. Like to the point I may have called out. But I know Elizabeth would be sad. So I got myself together and went to camp.

James was a little to hovery because they knew I wasn't feeling right. But I needed space so I tried not to be a huge bitch about it but basically waited until they left for work to do my makeup and finish getting ready. And then grabbed the sandwich they made for me because they love me so much and it made me feel less cranky about everything. Knowing how loved I am. Love them so much.

I got to camp at 8 and after getting my walkie and big spray I went to see Elizabeth and get the ropes key and the schedule for the day. That is when I noticed that the programs were an hour and a half with 15 minutes between them. So basically an hour and 45 minutes. For 5 kids to do programs that we struggle to fill an entire hour with normally. When we have 16 kids. So I was like hey, this on purpose? And she was just like oh, well just do whatever you can. So I was very stressed about this basically all morning. We probably said it to many times between me and Celia to the chaperones but they were a bit confused about it too. Like. It's just a lot of time! Longer then yesterday's when we were doing the same programs. So it was just really weird.

And then a bunch of stuff went awry. I went and set up ropes and Cecilia came up to get the old water cooler I found. And then no one was ready at 845 when we should have all basically been at the hacienda. And then I'm getting called to come down to the rock wall but then Tony (welcome back Tony!!) took over that and so I went back to the hacienda. Where we got a call that all the other water coolers were missing. And poor Sarah was driving around on the gator to try and find them. And then Brayden was there to get the group for horses. And then Celia was there and so we also took our ropes group and we were off.

We started right at 9. And we're basically done by 930. The program was supposed to go until 1045. So this was no good.

We would go and try the whale watcher. And I told them I can do my musuem tour as a podcast and so I did that with Celia playing the part of the children when I ask questions and the chaperone doing hand motions to act out what I was saying and it was really silly and fun.

Once I got like 5 or so minutes in to my speech I said I would go up to horses to check in.

Laney and Rachel were up there and they were also basically done. It was like 945 at this point. And they brought out paint to paint on the horses, just to fill the time, and they said I could bring out group up and have both groups up there. And once the first horse group was done painting they could do ropes.

This sort of worked. It was nice petting the horses. But then one of the girls, who of course really loved the horses, started having an allergic reaction. So I would take 4 of the 5 kids, who the chaperone took the girl having the reaction to their medical person.

This group has the highest support needs and while they were having fun, me and Celia were essentially the only spotters and they kept falling on me!! We were all laughing but these kids were mostly bigger then me and I was going to be, as one girl said, "squished like a pancake."

After they got bored of the ropes we went to the whale watcher. But they didn't understand or didn't want to actually balance. Instead they were for sure sensory seeking and were just slamming the seesaw down. For like a few minutes. It was loud and eventually Elizabeth called us and told us she could hear it across camp and we had to stop.

It was about 11 at this point. I will remind you that the first program should have been 9 to 1030, then the second program was 1045 to 1215. So it being 11 you see the problem. So I made the call to take them to arts to paint.

And that ended up being great. We went up there and I got them watercolors and they really seemed to enjoy it. It was just really pleasant and I felt happy. And I was happy when one of the boys, Calder, kept telling me how happy he was.

Celia had made a stop at the office to get a sweatshirt and when she came and joined us she let me know that all the other program areas had basically given up and they all cleaned up already. One group was in the field, one was playing diskgolf, who knows where the other one was. So Celia went to pack up low ropes, and around noon I took the group to lunch.

Me and Celia get along a lot. She lets me be very silly and we basically just use internet lingo all day which is just really goofy. I also showed her my fidgets and she told me about hers. I'm excited she's going to be specialty staff this summer.

We headed back to the office. Checked in with Elizabeth. She told me she also has a tummy ache. She told us that if anyone wanted to stay for hours they could but if not we could go.

I was hungry and was still not feeling myself. I was able to mostly hold it together for work but I was ready to get out of there.

I went to hunt valley and got a burrito at chipotle. I ate outside and it was beautiful out. It made me feel a little better.

I walked to Marshalls next. Where I got a candle and a cardigan and some body oil that smells like strawberry candy. And I just had a nice time looking around.

But I was ready to go home. I put on loud music to keep myself awake. I also drove with the windows down because it felt so nice out. And when I got home I got changed and showered. I cleaned the bottom of the fish tanks. And laid down.

I mostly just watched videos but eventually I did fall asleep. And had pretty intense dreams again. No idea why they have been so strong lately.

When I woke up James was there. They would make us nachos for dinner. I wouldn't feel ideal. So even though I already took a shower I decided to take a bath and fill wash my hair and shave my legs and it helped. While I was in there James went for a walk.

When they got back we just talked for a while. Hung out with Sweetp. Eventually got in bed to lay around and watch tiktoks together. And now the sun has set, surprising us both. I am going to go moisturize my face and get ready to sleep.

I have tomorrow off. And I am hoping to make a target run for some stuff. And clean the apartment. But mostly I just want to be alone. Which sounds terrible but also I haven't been a lone a lot lately and I'm sure the sun has been a big culprit in my tiredness but I also have not had any time to be by myself and we set. So let's hope tomorrow helps me out.

Sleep well everyone. Take care of each other! Goodnight!!

[inky-duchess]

Duchess's Pick: The Tudors 2x08.

So this series of post is not meant to criticise these shows buto to explore the worldbuilding & its details to help historical fiction or historical fantasy writers spot the inaccuracies within popular media. This episode was picked by @anomaly00

Clothes

Tudor Men always wore hats. Eddy Seymour is rocking one in the first minute of the episode.

His sister is just wandering around with some jewels in her hair and her tits on show. Nah. She's unmarried so hair down is a good mark but where's your headdress, young lady? (1:35)

Anne should not be wearing her hair down or uncovered. (3:00)

Also Jane no bow? And are you going to keep your cloak on while serving your Queen? The level of disrespect... (3:40)

Ladies, that is a veil but you can see your hair. That just defeats the purpose (7:31)

Excuse you Thomas Wyatt. Why aren't you laced up? You are not Colin Firth, please close your doublet (15:23)

Jane, why is your hair up? Have you married? No? Then put your hair down and wear a fucking hood. (15:52)

Henry Motherfucking Tudor where is your gorget? If that lance splinters and gets you in the neck, you will die. Die. Chainmail is not good enough, young man. (27:29)

Court Politics

William Brereton & Chapuys are just having a treasonous chat in the corridor with everyone around them. Chapuys do you want to be sent back to Spain tp explain to the Emperor that you've fucked up? Or die? (4:00)

My Pope, my guy. This is how you do politics. Use that fuck to do your dirty work, play to the people. (10:12)

Now, you shall spot a guard over the shoulder of Henry Norris. He is doing exactly what he should be doing. The King must not be alone. (21:41)

This children is a feast. Everyone in attendance, chatting and eating. This is what a court looks like (37:58)

Etiquette

Also Ladies in waiting, this is a good enough attempt at gowns but we're missing veils & proper sleeves. (2:00)

The King walks in to the herald's cried warning so everyone has time to get ready. This is right. (3:41)

Henry's just on his own? Where is is guards? His gentlemen? His fucking hat, where is it? (5:00)

Cromwell, no offense, but you call that a bow? Thatcher could do better (6:38)

And yes, Anne and other Queens often did this charity. Washing the feet of beggars and giving them money. (8:58)

Kneeling to Pope was OK. But Francis, no need to go so hard. I thought you fell 😂 (9:34)

The Great Hall was set like this but this is not supper. Everyone would eat together. The guys eating are just having a snack (15:12)

Jane, very nice curtsy here. Also you should only rise if given permission to, which she did so gold medal 🏅(16:50)

The King could never just sneak up on you like that. He's meant to be surrounded by ar least a dozen gentlemen & guards. You'll notice him coming. (25:38)

Mark would not have been allowed to hold her this way. He was a commoner. One doesn't simply go hug a Queen. (29:01)

One would probably not lay a monarch on a table with some raw meat. But Jonathan Rhys Meyers is doing what he does best, looking like a goddamn meal😍 (30:31)

Sorry but nobody would tell the monarch not to do anything. Family may advise it but certainly not a common physician. My guy, no. (36:46)

And the Seymours are just gonna leave their unwed, potentially valuable daughter alone with Charles. First of all, nope. Second of all, that's Henry Cavill, are you blind Lord Seymour? (37:22)

No announcement for Jane. Fire that groom (41:37)

This groom is so fired. Announce people for the love of God! We wouldn't have #wenchingwithmistressseymour2020 (43:16)

Excellent service from the ladies here. One motion or sound and up from their seats they go. The very least expected of a lady or maid in waiting. (44:29)

[lukemichaelcalumashton]

Opening Lines Game

thank you @squishmichael and @allsassnoclass for tagging me <3

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories. (If you have less than 20, just list them all!) See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line. Tag some people to play the next round!

it just so happens that i have exactly 20 fics posted so!!! this is kinda perfect. however i struggle so much with writing first lines for fics soooo i’m not sure how great this is gonna be svjfsdjsds

1. i wanna hold your hand while we're growing up

“Alright children, pick a buddy!” As soon as Miss Maya stops talking, the group of eight-year-olds gathered around her begin to scatter, each looking for their field trip buddy.

2. passport control

Two minutes. Michael has been at the airport for two minutes and already, his entire band has texted him.

3. mating call

Luke likes to think that, after ten years, he and the boys know each other pretty well. 

4. fueling the fire until we combust

Ashton is a planner. In fact, he is a great planner.

5. if i could say the things i want to say (i’d find a way to make you stay)

The first time it happens, Michael doesn’t think much of it. It being Calum dragging him to a local bar on a Friday night.

6. you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes

Ashton finds Calum in the dressing room.

7. stay stay stay (i've been loving you for quite some time)

Ashton has been awake for some time.

8. your arms around me feel like home (i’m homesick)

As someone who has three boyfriends, Calum rarely comes home to an empty apartment.

9. the very first page, not where the storyline ends

“Goodnight, Ashton! I’ll see you tomorrow!” Ashton looks up to see Sierra making her way to the front of the bookshop after clocking out for the night.

10. (ferris) wheel of fate

Michael regrets letting Luke drag him to this stupid fair. 

11. wherever i am, i'll come running

Ashton’s phone wakes him up, the ringing too loud and too close to his ear, making it impossible for him to ignore it and go back to sleep.

12. this could have been an email

Luke is in the break room, throwing sweet corn kernels at Ashton, trying to get them to stick to his hair without him noticing, when he hears the rumor.

13. let me feel you burn into me

“What are you working on?” 

14. Just a touch (too much)

Calum climbs off of Ashton, falling back against the bed to try and catch his breath.

15. home in your arms

It starts innocently enough. Only a few days after they leave Australia and move to London, Calum wakes up abruptly from a nightmare.

16. 20/20

Ashton is mindlessly scrolling through his Instagram, waiting for the popcorn to be ready, when he hears Calum speak up from the living room. “Oh, look who finally decided to show up!”

17. you distract me (but I'm distracted without you)

“Do you still even own an apartment?” Ashton asks the moment he opens his door to find Calum standing there, waiting to be let in. “’Cause I thought you did, but somehow you’re always here.”

18. Work Up A Sweat

Calum wakes up to find his bed empty of his boyfriend.

19. Bake It Till You Make It

Ashton jumps when someone knocks on his door, sending flour flying everywhere.

20. You Pool Me In

When Ashton called the pool cleaning company, he assumed they would send some boring middle aged man to do the job. Someone who would wear a dirty tank top, clean his pool, then leave. 

okay pattern is that. 11/20 mention ashton in the first line so svfdfsfs clearly i talk about ashton a lot. most of them aren't dialogue which is a bummer because i love when fics start with dialogue and i try to do it but i usually don't come up with something i like. ummm most of them start with a name and they're short-ish???

now favorite opening line? i think 5 from if i could say the things i want to say (i'd find a way to make you stay) it's nothing too special but i like it! and for some reason i also like 12? from this could have been an email because it's a little ominous like, what rumor did luke hear y'know? also i love how i managed to mention ash in the first line when he's not even part of the main ship of this fic svfjskjs

okay this was fun now i'm gonna tag some people to do this (who were probably tagged by someone else already! oops) @lifewasradical @daydadahlias @ashtcnirwin

[ash19871962]

Sisters

Warnings- Blood, Domestic Abuse, slight mention of suicide (not my choice criminal minds made the story for rosalyn)

Jennifer Jareau x OC Jareau

Having an older sister was sometimes a blessing and a curse. There was absolutely nothing you wouldn't do for her, after everything she had done for you. It annoyed you how quickly you guys would make up after a fight, but she was your best friend.

Both of your childhoods were incredibly different, having grown up in the same house but with totally different atmospheres. When you were two and JJ was 11, your 15 year old sister Rosalyn took her own life.

After that things changed in your house, you don't really remember it too much but Jj would tell you stories about that time. Especially at night when you were supposed to be sleeping, trying to remember a sister you don't actually remember is very difficult.

Of course you've seen pictures of all three of you but she is still a stranger to you. But to Jj it affects her deeply, Ros was her idol.

Sometimes in the back of your mind you wonder if Jj even likes you or is just using you to replace Ros. After all your 9 years younger than her? But she is still your big sister and you can't think of her like that for long.

It doesn't surprise you as you grew up that Jj is everywhere. Anything that happened she was there, when Ricky that snot nose kid from 1st grade punched you in the face, she spent hours in the garage showing you how to block your face.

At 14 years old she had much better things to do but she stayed with you. Cleaned your nose and made sure you didn't tell mom. Your mom was probably more of an absentee parent, like she was there in body but not in mind too much. Jj says Ros took a part of her, but sometimes you feel jipped.

Mom apparently used to laugh and smile, plan fun things for them all to do. But you can't remember any of this. You only remember Jj. She was the only one who looked after you, kept you safe it was almost like she was your mom at times, but you always remember her.

Remembering sharing a bed with her during storms, playing in makeup singing stupid songs, sharing secrets and just plain missing her.

She would be so disappointed if she could see you now. Not really having a choice anymore anyways, telling her is essential but your still scared what if your big sister can't help?

Shivering in the cool breeze taking into account your still bleeding a little you decide it's time to leave. Wiping the blood out of your face as best you can, the gash above your eye stings.

The fight you just had was nothing new, the bruises on you back would testify to that. Even through all this you still don't know how to even tell Jj.

It's not an easy conversation, she is either going to be so mad at you she won't speak to you or so over protective she's gonna kill him.

Your phone on your lap feels heavy, but the nerves in your stomach feel like a lead weight. Opening your messaging app you text her

Aj- Hey jayge Are you busy, can I call?

A couple minutes ago by and she texts you back

Jj- Abs! Hey hun yeah we're almost done with this case, give me a couple hours I'll text before we head to the airport ok? Love you💜

You don't want to be disappointed but you guess it'll have to do. Grabbing your phone making your way into the house stopping briefly to grab a couple changes of clothes and your memory box which has everything important in it including you birth certificate.

Making a split decision you also leave your phone but write down all the important numbers just in case. Knowing by the time Jj texts, you'll either be in the hospital or with her.

Nothing else in this house is important . Feeling like the worst thing possible is being stuck here, you leave and make your way home to Jj.

Getting behind the wheel planning to make such a long drive from Pennsylvania all the way to Quantico or at least as close as you can get.

First things first she needs a Dr, so she decides to take care of that first pulling out of the driveway and driving putting a hospital search in her GPS, locating one two towns over that she won't be recognized in she proceeds there.

Sitting in her car fiddling her humbs working up the courage to move. Finally making the decision you walk in and start a new life.

A nurse approaches you and escorts you to the back, answering questions left and right

Name Abigail Jaraeu

Age 20

What happened... Your not exactly sure how to answer this so you don't answer.

Getting changed into the stupid gown you realize how alone you are. Butterflies fly in your stomach making you almost nauseous.

The Dr, has a knowing look in his eye as he looks over your injuries, noticing more than you realize.

The gash above your eye takes 8 stitches, your nose is not broken but two black eyes are in your future, didn't even notice the split lip until the dr goes to stitch it 3 more there.

Feeling absolutely terrible it's not done, the rest of the body check shows more injuries none of them too serious just painful.

The broken wrist being the worst, mystified that you could drive all the way there without so much as a twinge of pain.

Apparently adrenaline is a real thing.

Shocked as the Dr starts applying the cast, absently shocked and numb to how you you must look.

You just want Jj.

To hug you, to hold your hand, to kiss your forehead, your scared and you want your big sister, but she is at work.

Surprisingly no broke ribs just jarred heavily, and of course the bruises, you are given a prescription for pain and instructions for the cast, and you sign yourself out against what they recommend but you know you are just ready to be with Jj.

The drive from this place to Jj is roughly 5 hours so you get started.

The phone you left at the house has to be found by now. Memories of the fight flash as your merge on the interstate, setting cruise control you let yourself relax.

The shoving, the broken mirror the outrage that you didn't do anything wrong. It made no sense to you, Johnny was supposed to be a good guy, but he ended up being the scariest thing you've ever encountered.

As your driving you remember Jj is on a case so no one is at her house. Your nephews would be with Wills Mom. Maybe you could stay there till they got back you had a key?

In this situation you didn't think she'd mind.

God you were scared, what If she yelled at you? If she did your pretty sure you would crumble.

Driving is incredibly hard with a cast but you have to make due, you have to get there. Once there everything will work out.

Feeling incredibly guilty now, you think should you even bother Jj? She literally has children what if Johnny came there?

You don't think he's that stupid but you never know. Jj would kill him.

Stopping to fill up with gas using most of the cash you have, you keep driving closer and closer to safety.

For probably the quietest drive your ever made in your life you finally make it to Jj's neighborhood.

Concerned now because it's 2 am and the street is completely deserted, you make up your mind to park farther down the road from her house just in case she's actually already home.

The upstairs light is on, and your basically a nervous wreck. All you want is her, but scared in how she's gonna react .

Slowly getting out of your car, you make your way to Jj's porch and knock softly.

Hearing the footsteps, turns the butterflies in your stomach turn to rocks.

Will opens the door angry someone knocked on the door at 2 am. The second he sees your face his jaw drops, and concern fills his eyes.

Your arms are grabbed into a hug, tears finally fall from your eyes as he calls for your sister to come down the stairs.

Obviously Jj took that offensively, as it's 2 am and she only just got home.

Upon seeing you stitched casted and crying in her husband's arms, all composure is gone.

The next couple of minutes are a blur, feeling yourself be transferred into her arms, sobbing uncontrollably, but strangely you feel better.

Her hands are on your cheeks, and her blue eyes are filled with anguish but at that moment you feel safer than you have in a long time.

"What happened to you Abs? I tried calling you and Johnny said you went to bed"

There is a lump in your throat "Johnny did this, all if this"..

Out of the corner of your eye you see Will leave the room, and in that moment you know, you have to tell her everything..

The story spills from your lips, how he stared out like a normal boyfriend, then he just got so angry at everything how the fights started and how this one ended, how scared you were but most of all how you just had to get to her.

Jj stares back speechless and incredibly livid, her baby sister her best friend was hurt, and came to her.

She pulls you into another hug and in that moment it didn't matter how you looked or were you came from, you were home.

Jj would fix everything, and you would never be able to repay her.

[bulkyphrase]

Everybody & the Avengers Team

I've got a new fic rec list for you!

The stories in the "X & the Avengers Team" tags focus on one person's relationship to the Avengers team as a whole. Courtesy of AO3's tag browse and Excel, here's a ranked list of the top 20 most popular pairings:

Tony Stark | 2470 total, 240 OTP

Peter Parker | 2255 total, 85 OTP

Steve Rogers | 602 total, 56 OTP

Loki | 387 total, 26 OTP

Natasha Romanov | 308 total, 35 OTP

Clint Barton | 268 total, 46 OTP

Bruce Banner | 244 total, 15 OTP

Thor | 209 total, 7 OTP

Avengers Team | 174 total, 24 OTP

James "Bucky" Barnes | 156 total, 7 OTP

Wanda Maximoff | 143 total, 4 OTP

Phil Coulson | 105 total, 9 OTP

Darcy Lewis | 91 total, 6 OTP

Matt Murdock | 60 total, 8 OTP

Sam Wilson | 53 total, 5 OTP

Nick Fury | 41 total, 5 OTP

Harry Potter | 40 total, 0 OTP

Pepper Potts | 31 total, 1 OTP

Vision | 29 total, 2 OTP

Stiles Stilinski | 25 total, 0 OTP

In chart form, if you like charts:

Notes:

The numbers after the names are the number of stories tagged with that ship. OTP means the number of stories where that is the only relationship tagged on the story. Numbers are accurate as of July 2021.

Story Recommendations

For your reading pleasure, included below is at least one fic rec for each pairing except the crossovers from non-Marvel fandoms (apologies to Mr. Potter & Mr. Stilinski). Most are gen fic, and even in the ones with a romantic pairing, romance is not the focus.

Tony Stark

As Subtle As Cognitive Recalibration by petroltogo (Teen, 8949) tumblr: @tonystarktogo

Standing inside his penthouse, listening to Rogers, Barton and Banner explain to Fury how they just happened to stumble over the Tesseract on a routine security check of Stark Tower’s roof and wouldn’t you know, they’ve managed to fight off the looming alien invasion before it could really start and secure the missing overpowered nightlight is one of the most surreal situations Tony has ever had the displeasure of experiencing.

Peter Parker

the worst field trip ever by shrill_fangirl_screaming (Teen, 3420) tumblr: @i-am-having-an-emotion

"We're on a field trip," Peter said. "To here. And Tony decided to be our tour guide and absolutely embarrass me, so can you please help get him under control?"

Which is how Peter Parker, architect of his own destruction, ended up with not one but two superhero pseudo-dads being annoying on his school field trip.

Steve Rogers

Do You Remember Being Happy? ('Cause I Sure Don't) by GalaxyThreads (Teen, 11022) tumblr: @galaxythreads

That seems about right. He doesn't know how he knows that, though. He does have vague memories of an annoyed fondness at finding peanut butter in some sort of jam. Thor's doing, because he doesn't see the point of using two knives when one works just as fine. He knows that. How does he know that? He knows all those little details, though, almost innately. How can he know these strangers so deeply?

Everyone else below the cut!

Loki

Proprietary by TheThirdMarauder (Teen, 7639)

No, Loki simply wants the Avengers conquered. The details of whom, how, and when matter not. Unless, of course, said details interfere with Loki's plans. Then, well, then none can fault him for protecting his own interests.

Loki has always been exceptionally good at lying to himself.

Natasha Romanov

What Girls Are Made Of by enigma731 (Teen, 4613) tumblr: @enigma731

She rolls her eyes but does as he’s indicated, using his shoulders to leverage herself up onto his back, her arms around his neck and her legs hugging his waist.

“You know,” he says blithely, “this isn’t really what I tend to picture when I think of a hot girl riding me.”

Natasha groans, deciding that if his sense of humor gets them arrested, she’ll kill him herself. “Just go.”

Clint Barton

Dear Clint Barton (circa age 7) by pollyrepeat (Teen, 4221)

With a normal person, this might count as blackmail material, but a) this is a case of mutually assured destruction if ever there was one, and b) Fury is immune to embarrassment. Not just in the regular, Tony Stark way, either, oh no. Things that could possibly end up being embarrassing to Fury get somehow warped and changed until they go from mortifying all the way over into useful and/or good for his image. It’s like a superpower.

Carrying Clint’s small child self around on his shoulders more than once has probably already hit the interagency rumour mill as an example of Fury’s innate awesomeness: good with rocket launchers and small children.

Also available as a podfic!

Bruce Banner

They're Not Wrong by Trumpeteer34 (Teen, 10163)

As Tony began to pace around the hole in the road to keep himself from shooting repulsors at the nearby buildings in a fit of rage, Thor began to study the nearby area. There was no sign of either the Hulk or Bruce Banner beyond the crater. The surrounding area, aside from the rubble of the fight, held no clue as to their friend’s location.

“Guys, he’s gone,” Tony growled into the communicator on their private line, drawing Thor out of his darkening thoughts. “Someone tranqed him and took him. He’s gone.”

Honorary mention goes to the Responsible Science series by @letteredlettered - the stories don’t have the "Avengers Team & Bruce Banner" tag, but they could, and they are amazing. The best Bruce Banner writing I've ever come across.

Thor

Fortunately, I Am Mighty by onward_came_the_meteors (General, 3062)

Steve was the first one to speak. “Are you okay?”

Thor nodded. Which was a bad idea, as it turned out, because now there were little gray lights flashing in front of his eyes. “I’m fine.” Absolutely everyone narrowed their eyes, and he added, “But, uh. Could we possibly not get back in the car just yet?”

Avengers Team

Civil Wasn't by onward_came_the_meteors (General, 7123)

"We're having an ideological conflict here," Tony stated with disbelief. "Are you telling me you still want to go out to dinner?"

"It's a standing engagement, Tony," Rhodey reminded him.

"Not you too—"

"We already had to reschedule from Friday when Natasha was..." Rhodey frowned. "What were you doing?"

The question was directed toward Natasha, who shrugged and said, "Spy stuff."

James "Bucky" Barnes

You Know How I Feel, aka, The Adventures of Bucky and Muffy the Dinosaur by ifeelbetter (Not Rated, 4511) tumblr: @ifeelbetterer

“As you may have heard, Bucky Barnes, a.k.a. The Winter Soldier, recently rescued a tiny part-robot dinosaur during the Avengers’ battle with Dr. Doom in Antarctica,” the other newscaster explained. “Pictures of Barnes and the dinosaur were posted on twitter by fellow Avenger, Clint Barton, a.k.a. Hawkeye, and immediately made Barnes’s new pet America’s sweetheart.”

“Her name’s Muffy,” said Steve."

Wanda Maximoff

and the woman was young again by Mira_Jade (General, 3669)

Tony Stark called them the Cap's Kooky Quintet, and sometimes the term amused her – causing her to lift a sardonic brow where someday a smile would truly smile. She enjoyed the presence of comrades – true comrades – and she enjoyed the way their minds wove and bound together about each other to fluctuate against her senses as one. There was something soothing about being in their midst, and even when their loud and brash ways – their painful Americaness - rubbed her raw and drained on her, it was ever the knitting of their minds that soothed those moments over, and made them inconsequential.

Phil Coulson

Coulson's First Day of School by storiesfortravellers (Teen, 3055)

Coulson looked up at him. “I like drawing pictures with Mr. Rogers. I like having tea parties with Ms. Potts. I like it when Dr. Banner reads me books, and I like it when Natasha teaches me things. And I like when you play with me. You do really good voices when we play action figures. And you’re the only one who lets me do stuff like jump off the high diving board at the pool or eat three cupcakes or play tackle with kids at the park.”

Clint didn’t realize that. He was pretty sure that meant that he was doing something wrong.

Darcy Lewis

Beginner Yoga for Dummies (Darcys) and Sad Hobos by chailover (Teen, 3434)

Darcy had a theory: crazy attracted crazy, working kind of like gravity. It was pretty much her explanation for her life after Thor. And if she had thought the type of crazy Thor attracted was bad, be it Loki or the Warrior Three and Sif, or the dark elves and the Convergence, it was still nothing against what the Avengers manage en masse.

Matt Murdock

Double Blind by smilebackwards (Teen, 2381) tumblr: @smilebackwards

Stark snaps his fingers. “You can’t see half of my inventions. This explains so much about you and why you’ve never been properly impressed by me.”

“Does it?” Matt says, ambiguously.

Sam Wilson

Bystander by scribblemetimbers (Teen, 52029)

“I just want you to know,” Sam says loudly, cautiously raising his hands, “That I’m very poor and very sleep-deprived and literally the only thing you can kill me for right now are my notes.” He pauses. Wait. On second thought: “Please don’t steal my notes.”

“I’m not—I’m not a mugger,” Not Mugger rasps out, and for all that he looks about to keel over and die, the man actually manages to sound offended.

Nick Fury

Bedtime Story by dixiehellcat (Teen, 2532) tumblr: @deehellcat

Fury snorted. “I have to check in with the duty officer. I’ll be back in, let’s say twenty minutes. I expect all of you to have whatever your pre-bedtime routines are completed, and be in here pajama’ed and ready to be read to.”

He tapped the book under his arm, then left with the usual dramatic swish of his long coat. Bruce scratched his head. “Did…he just say be ready to be read to?”

Pepper Potts

Pepper and the Avengers (Which She Knows Nothing About) by rebelmeg (General, 6696) tumblr: @rebelmeg

The Avengers, that mismatched group of hurt and heroism, was one of the most important things in Tony Stark’s life. So, naturally, Pepper had made them an important part of her life too.

Vision

039. Intoxicated by aimmyarrowshigh (Teen, 100) tumblr: @aimmyarrowshigh

It might be nice to fit in, just this once. To lose a bit of composure.

Vision floated over to the refrigerator and, with some timidity, pulled off a magnet. He stuck it to his forehead.

[casmybelovedass]

The Destiel Folder: Season 7

[Season 4; Season 5; Season 6]

This season is mostly Dean being a depressed bi who can't cope with his crush's death.

This is, in my opinion, the season where Dean actually starts realizing he might for real think of Cas as something more.

Episode 1:

Cas is basically gone, both Bobby and Sam (almost) are ready to compel to whatever he says, but Dean still tries to get him to come back. "You can turn this around. Please!" (3:13) Denial

Dean has no idea how to deal with God!Castiel, but desperate to find him, and getting emotional "I don't even know what book to hit for this." "Then figure it out!" (5:47) Anger

As we have said many times already, angels don't have a sex, Castiel is not a man, and as he states, he is "utterly indifferent to sexual orientation" (8:03), and so is Chuck, God himself, who has admitted having had both girlfriends and boyfriends.

Dean turns off the news the moment he hears a woman describe Cas as "young and sexy", while doing that jaw clentch thing of his (10:14) ... huh... [and this doesn't really matter, but after this we immediately see Dean in a purple flannel. PURPLE! Go Bi!Dean]

"He's not a guy, he's a God [...] Cas is never coming back. He's lied to us, he's used us, he's cracked your gourd like it was nothing. No more talk. We've spent enough on him." (11:09) Dean trying to jump to the 5th stage of grief. Yeah, no baby that's not how it works

Dean tries so hard to convince himself that Cas's gone so he can kill him, but can't really. "Just kill him now!" and struggles hard to hold Castiel's glare. And as soon as Death offers a second option to killing him, Dean takes it. Bargening

"Dean, look, I know you think Cas is gone." "That's because he is." (31:22) Again with trying to jump to acceptance. Not doing great, Dean. In fact, "Yeah, you know how I'm gonna deal? I'm gonna stuff my pie hole, I'm gonna drink, and I'm gonna watch some asian cartoon porn. And act like the world's about to explode, because it is." (32:17) There it is. Depression.

[Remember this: Dean has no shame in watching porn in front of his brother. Wait a few seasons and see]

Just moments earlier, Dean was all "That's not Cas, Cas is dead" and shit, and now he goes "What? You need something else?" worried-husband-mode the moment Cas asks for help (34:50). Also#MARRIED (35:16)

Bobby: "Where's Sam? It's go time." Dean: *looks back at Cas worried* (37:12)

MUST HELP HUSBAND (38:06) look at Dean's eyes!!! They're like 'It's okay, it's okay. You've got this.' "I'm sorry, Dean." Cas chose these words to be his last, thinking he was going to die. LOOK AT DEAN (38:21) ICWAW this would MEAN SOMETHING ELSE

"CAS! [...] Is he breathing? ... Maybe angels don't need to breathe." says the one who was going around saying Cas was gone for good. "He's gone, Dean." "... damn it... *tears up* Cas, you child... Why didn't you listen to me." #MARRIED (39:15) Then he goes "CAS?!" as soon as he starts breathing again. ICWAW, we would SCREAM "LOVE" in this scene

"Imma find some way to redeem myself to you *looks at Dean straight in the eyes*" "*looks at Cas up and down*... Alright, well, one thing at the time, come on. Let's get you out of here." "I mean it, Dean." *eye love-making* "... Okay." (40:30) ICWAW, oooohhh, the meanings this scene would have...

Dean's face when the Leviathans tell him Cas is dead. Again. (41:18)

Episode 2:

Dean looking at the Leviathans occupying Cas' body. The HATE (1:44)

"... okay... so he's gone. *shakes while tearing up* [...] Dumb son of a bitch..." (5:14) Here we go again... I'm fine, shut up

Dean picks up, washes, folds and keeps Cas' coat (5:23) SWEET

"You just lost one of the best friends you've ever had." this hurts me. "... I'm fine, really." (12:11)

"You asked me how I was doing? Well, not good." (38:54)

Episode 5:

Dean progressively drinks more as his nightmares get worse and he misses Cas more and more. 3 times we see him drink, only in the first 12 minutes.

Sam can tell Dean feels like shit, and bet one of those reasons is Cas "Like it or not, the stuff you don't talk about, it doesn't just go away. It builds up." (39:33) Yeah, and not only problems or grief... even love

Episode 7:

Not a destiel moment, but Dean totally got hit on by the waiter. LOL (7:30)

And again. What is it with men in this town and Dean. "We're looking for a necklace." "Romantic. *looks at Dean*" (12:17). Is it an energy reading thing or something? Can they feel the bi energy?

"The Campbell brothers. [...] They weren't actually brothers. That was a cover for their, uhm... alternative life style." (22:40) Huh... I guess calling your lover "brother" runs in the family

"Ever since Cas... I'm having a hard time trusting anybody." (40:44) ouch

Episode 9:

Dean is drunk/high on Leviathan juice, and the first thing he thinks and blabbers about, is Cas (19:48) "I don't even care anymore." Oooohh ICWAW... the possibilities for this scene

Episode 12:

Dean totally checked out that man in uniform. FIGHT ME (16:27)

Episode 13:

"You're head's not in it, man. When Cas died, you were wobbly, but now-" "Now what!!" (39:35) as soon as Sam mentions Cas' death, Dean gets snappy

Episode 17:

Dean keeps getting snappy whenever Sam mentions Cas

"OH my God the love of my life is alive!" (13:02-13:06)

Dean's face when Daphne touches Cas (13:25), and when he calls her his wife (13:41)

AND HIS FUCKING FACE TRYING NOT TO TEAR UP BECAUSE CAS DOESN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT HIM (14:16)

You mean to tell me that ICWAW this wouldn't be seen as a mini desperation moment from a man seeing his lover in this situation? Yeah, I don't think so

"What if you were some sort of... I don't know, bad guy." "I... I don't feel like a bad person." Dean's face is like "Damn right you aren't" (16:50)

"He betrayed you, this dude. He was your friend?" Dean looking at him... can't even answer the question (19:59)

Dean says Cas' betrayal is something he cant get over like everything else. And that he doesn't know why. "It doesn't matter why." "Of course it matters!" (20:25)

Dean gets visibly uneasy about Meg being so close to Cas (25:34) jealous boyfriend is jealous

Dean doesn't want Cas to remember, afraid he'll leave again (32:18)

"I've known you for years!" (32:34) poor baby. Also "You're an angel." "Uhm, I'm sorry? Is that a flirtation?" DEAN'S FACE (32:42)

Dean doesn't want Cas to be hurt by his own memories and past actions (33:00)

"You used to fight together. Bestest friends, actually." Yeah, look at that reaction. Let's see how he reacts to being called his boyfriend later on (33:09)

#MARRIED!!! I'll just leave this. No comment (33:41)

As Cas regains his memories, only 2 of the ones we see are not of Dean. And the only one we hear is the "I'm sorry, Dean." . That is what matters to Cas (and this looks like a slash video. Kudos to the editors) "I remember you... I remember everything." Yeah, no-homo save (34:35)

Not even an hour earlier, Dean was ranting about Cas betraying him, how he couldn't forget and forgive him, and now he is saying Cas did "the best you could at the time", but Cas actually feels guilt and doesn't want Dean to defend him, but Dean does anyway (36:53)

"We didn't part as friends, Dean." "*looks at Cas up and down*... So what?" "I deserved to die." the look on Dean's face (37:18)

Dean gives Cas his trench coat back. The trench coat he kept, folded and all the the truck, for weeks. And that's not even Baby. So he moved the coat, to always have it with him (37:26). I'm not crying, shut up

Also, here, have a deleted scene that breaks my heart

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Episode 20:

Let us all appreciate that one time Dean helped a lesbian flirt with a dude (24:27-25:03)

Episode 21:

Dean is devastated about Cas' mental state, that he did that to himself to save Sam. Look at his eyes in this scene (16:08). Also, Dean still resents Cas for the whole 'New God' crap, but it feels like the real reason is the fact that he left (19:18)

"Cas! Don't make me pull this car over!" "Are you angry? Why are you angry? *puppy eyes*" "... No I-I'm..." #MARRIED (27:28)

Cas says he won't fight anymore, but as soon as Dean's in trouble, he FLIPS

"The angels... they don't care... I think maybe they don't have the equipment to care." (31:49) Touchy much, Dean?, are you trying to convince yourself about that? It feels like he's making excuses to not let himself feel anything for Cas. "It seems like when they try, it just... breaks them apart." ... OK, fuck everything, ICWAW this would totally be seen as romantic angsty reference to Cas

Cas is so lost in his guilt for what he has caused. He looks like a baby, and it gets worse when it comes to Dean

"Why should we give you anything? After everything you have taken from us? The very touch of you curropts. When Castiel first laid a hand on you in Hell, he was lost!" (36:50) okay damn, ICWAW all of this would seem as if they were talking about a love relationship between the two and you can't tell me otherwise

'HURT HUSBAND-MUST PROTECT MODE' (37:17)

"The bone of a righteous mortal and the blood of a fallen angel" ... shut up, I'm dying over these clues (39:11)

"What are you gonna do, Cas?" Dean's eyes are begging him to stay. ICWAW, we would point that out without a shadow of a doubt (39:40)

Episode 23:

"Dude... on my car. He showed up naked... covered in bees!" ... come on, ICWAW this would be a HUGE deal (5:10)

"Go ask him. He was your boyfriend first." (8:51) LISTEN HERE. I study psychology, and one of the first things they teach you is that jokes are based on the truth. HOW MANY OF THESE JOKES WERE MADE?! HUH??!! (plus all the "Dick" jokes Sam made) Also Dean's reaction with the jaw clentch... just saying

Cas keeps stating he doesn't want to fight, but again, Dean's in trouble? FIGHT MODE

"*soft shoulder touch, puppy eyes, serves Dean a sandwich*" ... SOFT #MARRIED COUPLE (18:27)

"You got anything to say on the topic of dicks?" you'd like that, wouldn't you, Dean? (26:42)

Cas is afraid he will do something to cause Dean more trouble. Let's remember he chose what he believed were his last words to be "I'm sorry, Dean.", but as we know, Dean deals with feelings by showing anger... Cas gets upset and copes by playing twister... pathetic. "I can't help. [...] I destroyed everything and I will destroy everything again!" for a moment, Cas is lucid, and expresses his fear, but as soon as Dean gets angry with him, Cas gows back to hide in his world of crazy (26:47)

"I'm not good luck, Dean." "... You know what? [...] I'd rather have you. Cursed or not." Look at Cas' soft little smile as it grows. ICWAW, this would be read as another confession (32:38)

"I'll go with you." SOFT

SEE??! The MOMENT Dick threatens Dean, Cas goes full Angel of the Lord on his ass. MUST PROTECT HUSBAND (36:52) and the utter shock on Dean's face is priceless

And here comes PurGAYtory

[Season 8>>]

[bobasheebaby]

75 Criminal Minds Prompts

Some of these can easily go very, very dirty, and yes I’m talking about Morgan and Garcia conversations and honestly would it be a list without them?

1 “You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you’ve really stopped to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do. ― Hotch

2 “Life is a hell of a thing to happen to someone.”― David Rossi

3 “Destroying a book is like…destroying a whole world.” — Diana Reid 

4 “Trust me, kiddo. I’ve been here before.” ― David Rossi

5 “I’ve always heard every ending is also a beginning. We just don’t know it at the time. I’d like to believe that’s true.” — Emily Prentiss 

6 “He is the perfect man. He doesn’t hog the covers, and he poops in a box.” — Emily Prentiss 

7 “Went on a diet last night. Lost 185 pounds.” — Dr. Tara Lewis 

8 “Marital bliss followed by marital diss! Of course. Why didn’t I think of that?” — Penelope Garcia

9 “I don’t take kindly to being blown up. In fact, it kind of pisses me off.” — Derek Morgan 

10 “You know, I've learned that, in the short time I've had the privilege of being a dad... it heals wounds, just being there for your kid.” — David Rossi

11 “What makes you feel confident?” “Statistics.” — Derek Morgan and Dr Spencer Reid

12 “NAME , believe me when I say this, I've never known a normal day in my entire life.” — Dr Spencer Reid

13 “The number of pathogens passed during a handshake is staggering. It's actually safer to kiss.” — Dr Spencer Reid

14 “No one gets therapy these days without a healthy dose of medication.” “What are you implying, NAME?” “That everyone is medicated.” — Dr Spencer Reid and Penelope Garcia

15 “He/She doesn't give a damn about black or white. The only color that son of a bitch cares about is green.” — Dr Spencer Reid

16 “I don't know everything. I mean, despite the fact that you think that I do.” “I never said that. When have I ever said that?” “Every day since I met you!” — Dr Spencer Reid and Derek Morgan

17 “I never have any normal fans.” — Dr Spencer Reid

18 “Hey, Baby Girl, whatever you’re doing, drop it.” — Derek Morgan

19 “Talk to me, Baby Girl.” — Derek Morgan

20 “There you go, Baby Girl, that’s sweet.” — Derek Morgan

21 “Give it to me, doll face.” — Derek Morgan

22 “Hey, doll face. Ready to work some magic for me?” — Derek Morgan

23 “Hey, silly girl. I love you, you know that, right?” — Derek Morgan

24 “Hey girl, you’re on speaker. Behave.” “Or what, you’ll spank me?” — Derek Morgan and Penelope Garcia

25 “It was once said that love is giving someone the ability to destroy you, but trusting them not to.” — Derek Morgan

26 “Hey baby girl, I need you to work that magic of yours.” “Rub my lamp, release the Genie.” — Derek Morgan and Penelope Garcia

27 “You really are afraid of the dark.” “I'm working on that.” “You should work a little harder.” — Derek Morgan and Dr Spencer Reid

28 “Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, pump your brakes. What is this about?” — Derek Morgan

29 “Oh, and if you hate sad stories as much as I do, you should leave the room right now, 'cause this is super sad!” — Penelope Garcia

30 “Enchantress of all things possible, use your imagination.” — Penelope Garcia

31 “My least three favorite words strung together: I don't know.” — Penelope Garcia

32 “Hello, my pretties. I have seen the wizard and he granted my wish.” — Penelope Garcia

33 “She knew where to toe the line between right and raunchy.” — Penelope Garcia

34 “OK, let me get you on a secret: Guys, we don’t do well on subtle clues, OK? You got to be direct, straight up. Just tell him exactly what you want!” — Derek Morgan

35 “It’s who you are, Baby Girl. You see the beauty in everything and everyone no matter where you go. That part of you is never gonna change, and I won’t let it.” — Derek Morgan

36 “NAME, people need to know that they're important and sometimes you forget that.” — Hotch

37 “Don't you have something better to do?” “Than to annoy you for three hours? Hell no.” — Hotch and Derek Morgan

38 “I think, deep down, we're all capable of unspeakable things. Where it starts or what you call it, I don't know.” — Hotch

39 “NAME, this is the job, and I need to know that you can be objective.” “And I need to know that I can be human.” — Hotch and Emily Prentiss

40 “Scars show us where we have been, they do not dictate where we are going.” — Rossi

41 “You don't need to do anything you don't want to. Understand?” — Rossi

42 “Just be careful. That ego of yours is going to get you in trouble." — Rossi

43 “Somewhere along the line, I put myself first. I admit it, but I can't go back and change it." — Rossi

44 “It could be that, after all of these years, I rewrote history." — Rossi

45 “Time will pass and slowly you will find how much it hurts. And, maybe, you'll find something else to fill that empty space." — Rossi

46 “Where you headed?” “Nowhere in particular.” “How will you know when you get there?” — Rose and Gideon

47 “Only a man would waste $50 trying to win back that $3 stuffed animal.” — JJ

48 “This is my favorite part. This is where you hang yourself with your own tongue. So, please keep talking.” — JJ

49 “My father/mother believes that children shouldn't be shielded from the realities of the world. I do! Isn't that why we read them fairy tales in the first place?” — JJ

50 “Oh god, please tell me you don't have a crush on a fictional character.” — JJ

51 “You are the best ever.” “Aw, and you're the most perceptive.” — JJ and Garcia

52 “I once dated a guy/girl who washed his/her car more than he/she washed his/her hair.” — JJ

53 “Don't tell me what I want and don't want.” — JJ

54 “You do what it takes to protect your family.” — JJ

55 “Look, I don't speak smartass.” — Michael Russo

56 “How's it having NAME around?” “You can have him/her back whenever you would like.” Hotch and Garcia

57 “So, NAME, when are you and NAME walking down the aisle?” “Hey, whoa, whoa. Baby steps. Baby steps.” “When NAME says "I do", it'll be a national day of mourning for single men/women everywhere.” — Rossi, Morgan and Reid

58 “Ugh! This heat is brutal!” “You know, it isn't so much the heat as it is the humidity.” “At some point, it doesn't matter how you look at it. It all sucks.” — Derek Morgan and Dr Spencer Reid

59 “Need a minute?” “So, so badly.” — Matt Simmons and Penelope Garcia

60 “Hey. I came as soon as I could. What's wrong?” — Matt Simmons

61 “We ask questions, and we come home.” “No creepy weirdness?” “No weirdness.” “Good, 'cause I'm about full up in the creepy weirdness department for one night.” — Matt Simmons and Penelope Garcia

62 “Ooh, what about this one? Sunny, two-bedroom. It's close to work. And it's in your price range.” “NAME, you're moving? You don't like change.” “That's true. Change is my kryptonite. But the apartment is no longer a sanctuary. I have a new neighbor. Window's right here. He enjoys doing naked kung fu. Some things you cannot unsee.” — JJ, Simmons and Garcia

63 “Thank you.” “For what?” “For being you.” “Aw, thanks. I don't know how to be anyone else.” — Emily Prentiss and Dr Spencer Reid

64 “When a woman tells a man about her feelings, she doesn't want him to fix her. She wants him to shut up and listen.” — Emily Prentiss

65 “I just feel I can't understand others' emotions if I don't deal with my own, you know?” “The best way out is always through.” “Too bad it's not always the easiest one.” “You're not kidding.” — Dr Tara Lewis and Rossi

66 “It helps if they think you're crazy. They don't argue.” — Diana Reid

67 “I don’t hate you ... I’m just not necessarily excited about your existence.” — Dr Spencer Reid

68 “There are many paths to the same place. Trust me.” “Just so you know, you sound like a fortune cookie.” — Hotch

69 “I’m always right. Also, you’re secretly in love with me.” — Penelope Garcia

70 “I just gave the bartender my number in Roman numerals. If he/she figures it out, he’s/she’s worth a shot.” — Dr Spencer Reid

71 “Shh, the adults are talking. When it’s your turn to speak, I’ll give you permission. Okay?” — JJ

72 “Hey, mama, tell me something I don’t know.” — Derek Morgan

73 “Talk dirty to me.” — Penelope Garcia

75 “Hey, don’t make me spank you when I get back.” “Don’t listen time him/her, NAME, he’s/she’s all talk.” — Derek Morgan and Dr Spencer Reid

[fallenhuntersx]

Jimmy Fallon was one of your favorite talk shows to go on, he was hilarious, charming and he just made you feel at ease. You were preparing to get ready for it later, one thing about Fallon was it was in New York. Your favorite city in the world. As an actress, you'd been mostly all around the world and the different cities we're breathtaking but New York was like home.

You had moved over from the UK around 8 years ago when your acting career took off, starting in little productions, more bigger shows and your current Film production of being part of The Avengers Franchise, Being apart of the family was an unbelievable experience, they really felt like a second family especially the close connections you made. Never did you imagine you'd be apart of something so big around the world, people knew who you were, asking for photos, autographs. The downside was Paparazzi and trying to have some sort of personal life especially any sort of romantic relationship.

It was around 12 months since you started to feel some sort of close connection to your co-star, your feelings grew more and more for him. The more you spent shooting scenes together you grew closer, you were getting mixed signals as he would invite you to meals out when you had free time, he would show you around different parts of the city on locations, asking to come to your trailer when he was free, the only thing you did read correctly was the kiss he planted on your lips one night after a late shoot back in your trailer, you were both running lines together when he moved closer to you and kissed you, you didn't know to either kiss him back or kick him out.

After you shot your last scene for the film, the end of the filming party was sprung on you, you went all out with dressing yourself up in the sexiest dress you could find, black heels and hair loosely curled just how he liked it. You arrived at the after-party with all eyes on you including him, champagne glass in your hand, you made your way over to the bar where some of the others were chatting. You thought you would play it cool at first, see if he would come to you and then go from there.

A little time went by and he only looked your way, moments where you thought just maybe he would make the first move but no, you were left talking to Ruffalo about his part in the current climate change organization he was going to be working with. After around 15 minutes you had to use the bathroom so you politely excused yourself and moved around the dancefloor. You looked over where he was and he was no longer to been seen, you panicked as all sorts of thoughts were going through your head, had he left because you backed off, had he gone off with some other women. You were in a state of panic, as you felt your breathing get slower until you felt arms wrap around your waist and you knew they were his.

” y/n, are you alright ” speaking with concern, he held onto you until you were seated.

” Yeah, I'm fine, silly me forgot to eat before coming here ” you looked at him with a thankful look.

” let's get you something to eat then, yeah? ” you nodded. He was such a caring soul, doing anything for anyone not even asking for anything in return.

He made his way over to the catering table, picking up everything and anything in sight, by the time he came back over to both of your plates, were overflowing with food.

You only needed a bite to eat not the full buffet, but it's the thought that counts.

” erm thanks, I'll try my best to finish it all, but I doubt I can dance after this ” you laughed it off as an invitation for later. You'd been dropping hints all evening so you thought he might have caught on by now.

Half an hour passed and you bearly made a dent in the food he gave you but you were feeling a little better so what's a way to get rid of whatever it was than to dance it off. You smiled, getting up from your chair, you turned to him and asked 5 simple words ” do you want to dance? ”. ” I thought you would never ask ” he smiled taking your hand in hand leading you both to the middle of the dancefloor.

A little time had passed by and you were wrapped in a little bubble with him, dancing, laughing and talking a little here and there until you felt a tap on your shoulder.

” Y/N, I'm sorry but Pratt is here ” you're assistant said with regret, he was only doing his job. You had told him to tell you if he to show up with Kathrine, his new wife, you had been together for a while and basically, he broke your heart and you’d had just finally gotten over him. Being here with Hemsworth brought you back to your old self and you loved it.

” hey, we can go if you want to ” Hemsworth asked with sincerity in his voice, you smiled squeezing his hand.

” no, its ok, I'll be fine, anyway I'm here with you, and that's perfect to me” with just one look, that's all it took for him to place a soft kiss on your lips, you didn't care if you were out in public or in front of most of the cast and crew, all you wanted was him.

” FINALLY ” you broke your kiss when you heard Johansson shouting in the background. You smiled back at her with blushed cheeks. You turned your attention back to Hemsworth, reaching up to cup his face with your hands, gently pulling his lips onto yours as you danced the rest of the night away.

[xeraphan]

Figured I would play along. I'm fairly new to Tumblr, so here we go...

1. What is you middle name? Elaine

2. How old are you? 33

3. When is your birthday? December 10

4. What is your zodiac sign? Sagittarius Sun, Capricorn Moon, Sagittarius Rising

5. What is your favorite color? Green

6. What’s your lucky number? 13

7. Do you have any pets? Not right now.

8. Where are you from? Heidelberg, Germany

9. How tall are you? 5'3

10. What shoe size are you? 7.5-8 US sizes

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 6 or 7

12. What was your last dream about? I don't fully remember, but Loki was in it and we were on a boat.

13. What talents do you have? Writing.

14. Are you psychic in any way? I've had moments...

15. Favorite song? "Affirmation" by Savage Garden

16. Favorite movie? RENT (also my favorite Broadway)

17. Who would be your ideal partner? I got him. Tall, brown hair, blue eyes, makes me laugh. ^-^

18. Do you want children? I have 3 boys! I want more.

19. Do you want a church wedding? Nope, and I didn't have one when I got married!

20. Are you religious? To a degree.

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? Yup.

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? Nope!

23. Have you ever met any celebrities? Yes! Several! Most of them are voice actors.

24. Baths or showers? Both! Depends on Mt mood that day.

25. What color socks are you wearing? Black, yellow, and green President Loki socks.

26. Have you ever been famous? Sort of? I was on TV for a school production promo and later I was on the front page of the newspaper for a midnight premiere at our local movie theatre.

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? Nuuu... I'm too introverted for that.

28. What type of music do you like? I'm not really picky, but my favorite bands are Within Temptation, The Birthday Massacre, and Nickelback (don't come for me...)

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? Yes. Only once.

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? I've lost count. At least 3, usually more.

31. What position do you usually sleep in? Side or stomach.

32. How big is your house? I live in a 3 bedroom...so pretty big, but it's my sister's.

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? I don't eat breakfast.

34. Have you ever fired a gun? No.

35. Have you ever tried archery? Yes.

36. Favorite clean word? Delight.

37. Favorite swear word? Fuck.

38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? 48 hours.

39. Do you have any scars? Yes. I just gained a rather large one on my knee last year.

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? Yes.

41. Are you a good liar? I wish!

42. Are you a good judge of character? Sometimes.

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? Yes.

44. Do you have a strong accent? I've been told since I moved south, I've gained a pretty strong southern accent.

45. What is your favorite accent? British, German and Australian.

46. What is your personality type? Introverted. I'm shy but I try! 😂

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? My Princess Mononoke vest.

48. Can you curl your tongue? No.

49. Are you an innie or an outie? Innie

50. Left or right handed? Right-handed

51. Are you scared of spiders? TERRIFIED!

52. Favorite food? I'm a pretty big fan of tacos and pasta.

53. Favorite foreign food? German.

54. Are you a clean or messy person? Definitely clean. Disorganized...but clean.

55. Most used phrased? "What the fuck?"

56. Most used word? Delightful

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? Depends on what I'm doing. Going to the convenience store: 2 minutes. Going to work: half an hour.

58. Do you have much of an ego? Sometimes. Depends on what we're talking about.

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? I start with sucking, get impatient, then bite.

60. Do you talk to yourself? All the time! I'm a friggin delight!

61. Do you sing to yourself? Even more so.

62. Are you a good singer? Yes.

63. Biggest Fear? Dying alone.

64. Are you a gossip? I can be...but not typically.

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? Avengers: Endgame.

66. Do you like long or short hair? In between.

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? Yes, actually.

68. Favorite school subject? Science.

69. Extrovert or Introvert? INTROVERT! Big time!

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? No.

71. What makes you nervous? Being late.

72. Are you scared of the dark? I'm more scared of what could be in the dark, not of the dark itself.

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? Only if necessary. If the mistake doesn't hurt anyone, I let it be. If it could potentially get someone hurt, then yeah!

74. Are you ticklish? Very.

75. Have you ever started a rumor? Yes! Several about myself! I was trying to figure out who I could trust...I figured it out fast after that based on the rumor that got back to me.

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? I'm a mom?

77. Have you ever drank underage? Yes. With my parents even.

78. Have you ever done drugs? Nope!

79. Who was your first real crush? Kevin from the Backstreet Boys.

80. How many piercings do you have? 2 in each ear.

81. Can you roll your Rs? Yes.

82. How fast can you type? 65 WPM

83. How fast can you run? Hahaha! I don't run...but when I do, it ain't fast.

84. What color is your hair? Blonde

85. What color is your eyes? Blue

86. What are you allergic to? Dairy.

87. Do you keep a journal? No. I've tried to several times, but they usually end up filled with fanfiction...

88. What do your parents do? Both are retired military.

89. Do you like your age? I mean...I survived to be this age, so I'm pretty pleased for making it this far.

90. What makes you angry? Stupid people. Not like when people of stupid moments. Legit stupid people that do dumb shit and don't even realize they're dumb. 😑

91. Do you like your own name? Yes.

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? I've used three already: Damian Albert, Owen Grayson, and Timothy Scott (Batman fans...IYKYK). Should I ever have any girls: Elicia Isley and/or Emery Kyle.

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? I have 3 boys. I would like a girl now please.

94. What are you strengths? Hmmm...I am detail-oriented and can bust out a short story in less than an hour when I want to. I'm also really good at making people laugh.

95. What are your weaknesses? I overthink and question my decisions all the time, and I tend to leave a lot of projects unfinished for long periods of time unless they're for someone else.

96. How did you get your name? My godmother is where I got my first name from, I got my middle name from my aunt and grandmother.

97. Were your ancestors royalty? I have some royal ancestors, yes.

98. Do you have any scars? I feel like I answered this before. Physical scars, I jave a few. Mental scars, let's not go there.

99. Color of your bedspread? Is Loki a color? 😂

100. Color of your room? Purple.

Get To Know Me Uncomfortably Well

PLEASE DON’T LET THIS FLOP AHHHH

1. What is you middle name? 2. How old are you? 3. When is your birthday? 4. What is your zodiac sign? 5. What is your favorite color? 6. What’s your lucky number? 7. Do you have any pets? 8. Where are you from? 9. How tall are you? 10. What shoe size are you? 11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 12. What was your last dream about? 13. What talents do you have? 14. Are you psychic in any way? 15. Favorite song? 16. Favorite movie? 17. Who would be your ideal partner? 18. Do you want children? 19. Do you want a church wedding? 20. Are you religious? 21. Have you ever been to the hospital? 22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? 23. Have you ever met any celebrities? 24. Baths or showers? 25. What color socks are you wearing? 26. Have you ever been famous? 27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? 28. What type of music do you like? 29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? 30. How many pillows do you sleep with? 31. What position do you usually sleep in? 32. How big is your house? 33. What do you typically have for breakfast? 34. Have you ever fired a gun? 35. Have you ever tried archery? 36. Favorite clean word? 37. Favorite swear word? 38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? 39. Do you have any scars? 40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? 41. Are you a good liar? 42. Are you a good judge of character? 43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? 44. Do you have a strong accent? 45. What is your favorite accent? 46. What is your personality type? 47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? 48. Can you curl your tongue? 49. Are you an innie or an outie? 50. Left or right handed? 51. Are you scared of spiders? 52. Favorite food? 53. Favorite foreign food? 54. Are you a clean or messy person? 55. Most used phrased? 56. Most used word? 57. How long does it take for you to get ready? 58. Do you have much of an ego? 59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? 60. Do you talk to yourself? 61. Do you sing to yourself? 62. Are you a good singer? 63. Biggest Fear? 64. Are you a gossip? 65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? 66. Do you like long or short hair? 67. Can you name all 50 states of America? 68. Favorite school subject? 69. Extrovert or Introvert? 70. Have you ever been scuba diving? 71. What makes you nervous? 72. Are you scared of the dark? 73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? 74. Are you ticklish? 75. Have you ever started a rumor? 76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? 77. Have you ever drank underage? 78. Have you ever done drugs? 79. Who was your first real crush? 80. How many piercings do you have? 81. Can you roll your Rs?“ 82. How fast can you type? 83. How fast can you run? 84. What color is your hair? 85. What color is your eyes? 86. What are you allergic to? 87. Do you keep a journal? 88. What do your parents do? 89. Do you like your age? 90. What makes you angry? 91. Do you like your own name? 92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? 93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? 94. What are you strengths? 95. What are your weaknesses? 96. How did you get your name? 97. Were your ancestors royalty? 98. Do you have any scars? 99. Color of your bedspread? 100. Color of your room?

[pbandjesse]

I took an accidental nap after work and woke up at almost 8. Not ideal for fixing my sleep schedule. But I really needed it. I hate when I get so tired I get dizzy. It is not fun at all.

Today was a pretty nice day though. I slept pretty well. And I woke up and was excited to wear my green jumpsuit for St Patrick's day. I was messaging Laura all morning about Irish stuff. Superstitious stuff. Facts. It was cute.

I made a bagel to bring with me. And was happy to drive in. It was a good day. Beautiful out. Not as warm but still comfortable. I am hoping it is just going to be a beautiful and cozy spring.

I said good morning to James when I got to the museum. And went to start getting things together. I walked the tour route. No one else was there yet except for Rosia. I went to ask James to scratch my shoulder blade for me and that's when a bus pulled up?? It was only 904!! No one should be there yet!! Nothing was ready! No educator's were here!!

I went outside to say hello and it was my group. Shit. When I came inside Jessica was literally running through the musuem. She was uspset. Why were they already here? I suggested we set up a scavenger hunt. So me and Rosia went to get that. Adam came and grabbed a table to help. And I would get that handed out once the girls were all inside.

This was all 7th grade girls. And they were super sweet. So really it could have been worse. They would spend almost the next hour working on the scavenger hunt and just hanging out and taking pictures. So the educators could just take a breath and get everything ready. It really could have been a whole lot worse.

We had tours first. I went and got my little group and we had s pretty excellent tour. They were fun and had great questions and insight. We stopped at the car to take pictures. And at the pharmacy because one of the buildings at their school is named for the same pharmacist, Dr Bunting. So that was really neat.

We went to restoration next to do balls and track. And Cindy did a pretty good job for her first one. There was some mixing up of info and some ways she could slow down, the story telling aspect. But the girls got it and even the teachers made a team to build their own. It was fun. And I got to mostly chill to the side and work on my knitting and just enjoyed the hour.

They had lunch next. And I was honestly starving. I have been trying to make breakfast at home more but I never get this shakey when I get McDonald's breakfast. So I had my pasta and felt better.

I went and made sure my cannery was set up the way I wanted. And then got the girls to come to sit down. And it was a good cannery. I felt like we were running to fast though.

My intro was a couple minutes short. But it was fine. The first shift was for sure short though so I decided I would make my middle longer. But it we ended the second shift to early we were going to be in trouble. So I set a timer. And my shuckers we're getting in line to be paid spend the 4 minute mark. Which made Michael think it was time to call it. I told him to wait because we were only 5 minutes in. And he was like oh okay. But there was miscommunication upstairs and so some people got paid way to early. I let Jessica know about the confusion and we would figure it out. We would be left for 15 extra minutes after the stores. But they were fine.

During the stores I got everything set away and cleaned. And then once everyone was done we headed out. I took the other half of the tour group to take pictures at the car. Some went with their teachers to stand on the pier. And then it was time for them to go.

Except they didn't. Instead they went to the gift shop but then they were off.

I went upstairs to clean oysters. And ended up having a fabulous conversation with Jordan, Gaby, and Cindy about modern vs contemporary art and told them all about some of my favorite artists. Like Felix Gonzalez Torrez and Mike Kelley and Richard Serra. And they really like me just get in deep with my explanations and it was so nice to talk about things I'm so passionate about.

At 3 we were done. And I went and sat with James until they were done all their bookkeeping and closing stuff and then we headed home.

I got really tired in the car. And when we got home all I wanted to do was eat dinner. But that would take a bit. Even if it was mostly quick foods. So I had some angel food cake and candy and hung out in the couch. I drew a steel worker bear but he just looks like a construction worker. Ah well. Still cute.

James finished dinner and we laid on the couch. Eventually though I wanted to sleep. And moved to the bedroom. And fell asleep really quickly.

While I was out James accidently locked themself out of the building. Thankfully a neighbor let them in. And I woke up a quarter to 8 pretty disoriented. I am feeling better now. I have spent the last two hours laying in bed with James and watching videos and it was a good day.

I have nothing to do tomorrow. So I am going to clean the apartment and make art. Fingers crossed it is a wonderful day.

Sleep well everyone. Take care of yourself!!