#I’m exhausted and dead inside todays been long
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ca-d · 4 months ago
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the bluest blue hour 💙
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prkhaven · 9 months ago
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DAD AND DOLLARS — p.js
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the hot rich dad next door needs a babysitter? sign you up
pairing: dad!jay x money struggling fem!reader
genre: smut minors do no interact, dilf au, slight age gap (jay is in mid 20s and reader is in early 20s), p with plot, p with feelings
word count: 12.9k
content warnings: alcohol consumption, slight jealously, profanity, kissing, unprotected sex, p in v, dirty talk, praising, oral (fem rec.), fingering, squirting, breeding kink, creampie, petnames (doll, good girl, sir)
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You looked dead center at your laptop to see the ridiculous total number summed up. Over thousands of dollars of student debt is yet to be paid off and you’re not even halfway done.
You closed your computer shut because if it was out of sight it was out of mind, at least for the time being. You sighed, rubbing your temple hoping to soothe the ache forming but the sudden loud beeping of a truck backing up disrupted your train of thought.
The annoying blaring sound only worsened your headache that it felt like it was going to explode any second. Your eye twitched, you were already running on 2 hours of sleep, you hoped to at least get some sleep in before working until late in the night.
Standing up from your table, you walked over to the small window that allowed just enough space to see outside but your eyes narrowed seeing someone’s back quite literally blocking your view. You quietly mumbled under your breath before wacking open your door.
You currently were in no mood to deal with any solisticing today.
“Look-” You began but quickly stopped when you see the scene before you, a man—a hot man at that, not much older than you or at least you assumed carrying a little girl who resembles him
His hair perfectly combed back showing off his forehead and neatly done undercut with his sharp jawline that looks like it could quite literally cut you in half, a nose bridge all tall and mighty as he wore a simplistic nude pink button up that managed to make your knees weak.
Not a lot of people can’t pull that color off but he sure as hell can.
What stood out to you the most was the jewelry that shone in the sunlight blinding you. Just from the mere pieces of jewelry alone, you could practically feel the success flowing through and out of him.
The jewelry the little girl wore outcompeted each and every single one you could ever own. And yet, that wasn’t enough to make you peel your eyes away. You hadn’t realized how long you’ve been staring until the said little girl pointed it out.
Embarrassed, you finally looked away and the mysterious man cleared his throat. “Ah, if you'll excuse my daughter”
Wait what. Daughter?!
You held yourself back from dropping your jaw. Even though you were assuming he wasn’t much older than you, he already has a daughter, a young one at that and you’re over here stressing over student debt. What stressful time you must be having.
“We’ve been up since this morning moving in, so she is a little antsy. Please do forgive us for disrupting you”
Anyone would be if they’ve been up since morning to mo- Wait Moving in?
It must’ve shown on your face because the male in front of you lightly chuckled but it wasn’t like the usual chuckles that you hear from other guys. It was rather deeper, more mellow and rumbled out of him and it twisted your insides out.
“We’ve just moved in next door” He adjusted his daughter into one arm hoisting her up with ease while his free hand extended a hand to shake with yours, “Pleasure to meet you, I’m Park Jongseong”
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Another exhausting day, another terrible pay.
You’re genuinely wondering how you’re going to manage to just make it by this upcoming month without falling into a hole and never coming out of it.
Your current job isn’t nearly enough to cover all your expenses in the slightest but there’s such a shortage of job opportunities that you’re stuck there until some miracle falls into your lap and presents you with all the answers to your prayers.
Rubbing your shoulders, you twist your head side to side to feel the crack of your neck relieving you from the tension in it but that’s when you hear the deep faint voice that’s been taunting your mind ever since you’ve heard it.
Before you could even prepare yourself or more like jam your keys into the lock to rush in before getting caught you hear the small greeting for you, “Hi miss!” You nervously gulp before turning around replacing your mumbled breath with a sweet smile towards the little girl holding her dad’s index finger with her small hand
“Well hi there!” You cheerily returned her greet with a fast wave, your eyes remained trained on her not daring to look up to her father hoping there would be no interaction between but the universe was not in your favor today
“Coming back after a long day?” His voice filled your mind again and you held back a nervous smile not trusting yourself to speak only left you to nod at his words
Your eyes rose higher until you caught him and he gave a tight smile and you swore your heart might’ve exploded right then and there. It was something so simple yet it had your mind reeling.
You awkwardly touched your neck making it seem like it was sore when in reality you were making sure you still had a pulse.
“Say goodbye honey, she’s had a long day at work. I’m sure she needs some rest” Jay softly spoke to his daughter who looked up to your shaky eyes and raised her hand to wave goodbye to you
Your heart melted as you happily waved goodbye to her.
Too caught up in the moment, you seemed to have forgotten the very man you were successfully ignoring for those few seconds his daughter had your attention, “Make sure to rest well”
Before you could register the words, they were already walking past you in hushed whispers. Your mouth hung open trying to figure out a response that didn’t embarrass you.
“Thank you Jongseong. Same to you” You opted to say through the few second turmoil and when he turned around hearing your voice, it’s corny to admit but it was like slow motion
Everything seemed to be forgotten about as you were solely focused on him. The earrings that hung from his ears, his folded up sleeves exposing his forearm and watch until you saw his beautiful smile. A warm genuine smile.
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“Woah- Hold on. You mean to tell me that good looking man I saw on my way here was your neighbor?!” Your friend shrieked once you broke the news to her
Supposed to be an important study session for your upcoming exam somehow turned into a 3 hour talking session, laptops and papers discarded.
You groan at your friend's words, hate having to be reminded that he was indeed your neighbor. So close yet so far from you.
“He dresses so damn good, looks like he has a lot of” Your friend rubbed her fingers together with raised eyebrows making you roll your eyes, “Plus I saw him with his little sister, he’s such a good brother”
“That’s his daughter” You unconsciously said and you didn’t realize until you took notice of the silence from your friend who stared at you like she had just seen a ghost
“You mean to tell me that was his daughter with him..?” You nodded your head and your friend nearly fell off of her chair at the sudden revelation, “Holy shit… You’re living next door to a dilf!” Your friend screech as she stumbled in her seat over to you
You jumped when she clasped your hands into hers, hopeful eyes staring directly into you with a certain mischievous gleam you knew far too well.
“So when are you getting on that?” Your friend raised an eyebrow and you shot her a confused look
“Getting on what?”
Your friend had to take a minute or so to just look at you in amusement but not in a good way.
“You mean to tell me you haven’t even thought about getting together with him ever since you saw him?!”
You yanked your hands away before lightly pushing her away shaking your head. “He’s either married or at least seeing someone” You said trying to make it believable for yourself more than for her—but you always noticed the lack of band on his ring finger every time you saw him or any sign of anyone else living with him besides his daughter
“I didn’t see any ring on his finger” Your friend shrugged her shoulders, tilting her head to the side
So he must be seeing someone. Because there’s no way that he is single and roaming the streets just like that.
You quickly went to grab your discarded laptop to move on from the topic. This was enough talking for today about your undeniably hot neighbor who just so happened to be a dad.
Your friend suddenly slammed your laptop shut. “What are you doing?” You asked but saw her finger pointed directly towards you
“No bigger question is what are you doing” Emphasizing the you in her sentence
You stared at her dumbfounded, making her groan in annoyance.
“When was the last time you went on a date?” You opened your mouth to respond, “I mean an actual date” You closed your mouth right up
“Exactly! It’s been so long since you’ve been treated, why not indulge in this nonsense just a little” She squished her thumb and index finger together showing basically no space in between them
“In case you forgot, I’m a broke student trying to get by till the end of this month. I don’t have ti-”
“Yeah yeah I know. You don’t have time. You don’t have the money. You don’t have new or fancy clothes” Your friend cited the same excuses you’ve given to excuse yourself from anything thrown your way, “But don’t let it stop you this time. I have a good feeling about this one” She softly hummed with a soft smile hoping you take her words truthfully
“He’s most definitely seeing someone” You softly muttered
“And if he’s not?”
The question made you think. Even if there was the slimmest chance that he was in fact single and was not seeing anyone, why would he look your way? You don’t have much to offer.
“He’s a dad” You reminded but her soft smile dropped into something more menacing
“Well that’s just the cherry on top, no?”
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“What would I do without you?” Your friend chimed, wrapping your sweater over her, it was well past midnight and you finally concluded your study session after all this time and you couldn’t wait to fall asleep
“You’d be walking yourself out in the freezing cold” She chuckled at your response knowing it was the truth but she happily skipped ahead but stopped in her tracks raising and hand up to stop you
Before you could ask anything, she pulled your arm to where she is and that’s where you see Jay. His little girl fast asleep in his arms, her puffy cheeks squishing against his broad shoulder as he carefully closed the door shut wanting to make as minimal noise as possible.
He locked the car and stuffed his keys into his trench coat and right when he turned he caught sight of you and your friend looking, he furrowed his eyebrows immediately noticing how you weren’t wearing a sweater even though you were clearly cold from the shiver you let out.
Instantly you gave a quick smile to him not sure why he furrowed his eyebrows towards you but he kindly returned your smile with his own before walking past you and your friend still making sure his daughter was still fast asleep.
As he walked past you caught a whiff of his musk cologne and you wholeheartedly wanted to delve straight into it. It made your head woozy, it wasn’t strong enough that it was overbearing but it was strong just enough that made sure his presence was embroidered into your mind even when he was long gone.
“Oh” You heard your friend murmur and you turned to look at her dazed expression staring at where he once stood at the side of his car, “You actually got a double D living next door”
“Double what?” Pure confusion written over your face and she rolled her eyes as if it was the most known thing in the whole wide world
“Hello, a double D! A father who has money. Dad and dollars!”
You’ve just had a revelation.
“You my friend have a hot and rich double D living next door to you”
“You’re unbearable” You scoffed but you gasped when she lightly hit you
“That’s you”
“But I am being so serious right now, you better get on that man before I do” Before you could retaliate her sentence you heard faint shuffling coming towards your direction and to your surprise, you turned to see Jay coming back minus his daughter
“Oh” He stopped in his tracks seeing you and your friend, “You’re still here?” It easily could be mistaken as a harsh slap to the face but his tone was soft and gentle that there was nothing to it besides true curiosity
You opened your mouth praying that something coherent would come out but your friend knew better than to trust you and let you figure it out on your own. Especially when he was right there.
“She was just being such a kind friend and walking me out” Your friend softly patted your back and you mentally cursed at how cold her hands were against your thin covered back
“What about you? Coming out again?” Your friend tilted her head and you had to hold yourself back from dragging her away
“Have to bring the grocery up” Jay lightly waved the car keys before unlocking his car as the trunk slowly opened
“We can help you!” Your friend suddenly chimed in and you felt all color drain from your face, you just weren’t sure if it was from the cold finally getting to your numb face or how he stops walking and turns around
“You want to help?” He raised an eyebrow and your friend eagerly nodded and threaded closer to him, when his eyes moved from her onto you wanting to see if you were coming along you remained frozen in place
All the time you were merely in his presence, your body shut down on you as you became just a hollow vessel. He expected a response—any response from you but when he was received with nothing his lips formed a thin line and nodded his head.
“W-wait of course she’s going to help” Your friend awkwardly chuckled before walking back over to you, “It must be the cold getting to her. Silly her for not wearing a sweater”
You came back to your senses when your friend smacked your arm and you winced feeling how your spiky skin was far more sensitive to touch from how long you’ve been out there.
Yet, you didn’t have any chance to collect yourself as she dragged you with her in front of him as she gleamed with a smile. He blinked at the sudden appearance of you in front of him while you gulped harshly trying to keep your thoughts sane.
Even up close, your eyes looked over his face, never able to settle on a single feature until you landed on the slightly chapped lips but moved your eyes up to catch his eyes. Under dim lighting he looked phenomenal.
“Alright let’s get those groceries” Your friend peeped
You looked away from him down to the ground before softly nodding your head. You were going to help gather some bags but you stopped when you felt a weight place around your shoulder. You looked down to see the trench coat over your body.
Turning to face Jay, he gave a gentle nod. “You need it way more than me” His voice rumbled throughout your mind earning the gears to shift inside you by his voice and gesture alone
His eyes examined you in his coat before softly smiling to himself at his thoughts, “Next time make sure to bundle up before going out. You can catch a cold easily”
The cold that was once lived in your body faded away into pure warmth and it was all thanks to your neighbor living next door.
It hadn’t taken long until all the groceries were brought into his place in one trip. Your friend huffed, shaking her head as if she had run a marathon.
You softly chuckled at her state and softly padded her back to help regulate her breathing again. Underestimating her energy after hours of studying finally caught up to her.
“Who… Goes grocery shopping at this time?” Your friend pants
“I guess that’ll be me” Jay chuckles earning a curious look from you which he catches, “There’s not enough time in the day that allows me to properly shop and get everything I need, especially when I’m with my daughter”
“Sounds like you need a babysitter-” Your friend starts but abruptly stops, you looked over to her and saw the same mischievous look on her face and it sent unease to rest in your stomach
“A babysitter would be nice” Jay lowly sighed but waved it off, grateful to spend time with his daughter despite his busy schedule, “I just haven’t had the time to properly look into that”
“Well look no further because I know the perfect babysitter for you” Your eyes widen and you’re suddenly pulled forward once again and stood in the middle of Jay’s place looking like an animal caught in headlights staring right at him
“W-wa-Wh” You tried to speak but nothing came out as you tried to adjust to what your friend just offered, who she just offered which was you
“You?” Jay sucked his teeth as he looked at you noticing how his trench engulfed your body and unconsciously you straightened out your posture, “Just for uhm precautions… Why would you be a good babysitter?”
The sudden light hearted demeanor from him changed instantly and you couldn’t blame him. Two random girls—one of them your neighbor who you barely speak to, was just offered to take care of your daughter just like that. You’d be surprised if he didn’t do this even if it’s late at night and he’s still yet to put the groceries away.
“I-I won’t mind looking after your daughter” You explained as best as you can as you felt Jay’s piercing gaze on you. Adjusting his jacket over you, your eyes flickered around, “I live right next door so I’ll never be far- Plus my schedule is pretty flexible even with schooling”
“And I mean it’ll benefit you in the end right? I’ll do everything I have to do to properly take care of her”
“I'd like to help you out” You managed to give a smile the moment you made eye contact with him which you hoped didn’t creep him out, “I mean- You know to make sure you don’t get burned out so quickly and have time to focus on yourself! Trust me I know how it feels and it’s not fun” You awkwardly chuckled and you could hear your friend smacking her forehead behind you
His eyes never left yours and it felt like he was able to read every thought in your head. There was a moment of silence and you wanted to lay down in a hole and never show your face again. You nibbled on your lip as you watched Jay’s hard gaze on you.
He let out a sigh nodding his head, “Alright. When can you start?”
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Running around gathering your belongings into your bag still making sure to be as quiet as possible in order to not disturb the sleeping child in your bed.
You picked up a sudden dropped shift with the expectation of receiving a higher pay for the unexpected inconvenience. You could really care less for the ungodly hour you’ll have to work, money is money and you desperately need it.
And right on time, you heard the faint knock at your door and you knew it was none other than Jay picking up his daughter.
This was only your first week babysitting her, the first time awkward but easy but after the 4th day it was better than the first time—much better or at least you thought it was.
At your door, you closed your eyes and took a deep breath before carefully opening it to reveal Jay on the other side of it. A striking simple black suit that pierced your heart like an arrow as he adjusted his watch.
He raised his head to the sound of the door opening and gave a gentle smile making warmth spread across your chest. The silly little infatuation is driving you mad.
“Hi Jongseong” You greeted him, moving to the side just enough to welcome him in, “She was a little more tired today. She’s sleeping right now, just give me a second and I’ll go get her”
Without even being able to say a word, he watched as you disappeared. Normally, his daughter would be full of energy ready to greet him at the door when it was time to be picked up.
Keeping his lips in a straight line, he looked around your place noticing it was simple but homey. It spoke loud of who you were as a person which he’s come to realize, he doesn’t know much of.
He only knew the basic things about you but nothing in depth that could make him stand out in your life. He let out a deep sigh at the thought and rubbed his nape but stopped seeing you carefully carrying his daughter.
Her head rubbing against the juncture of your neck, her small arms wrapped around you and the fondness you looked at her with when she let out a small whine when you tried to hand her over to him.
Jay isn’t one to think of anything when seeing someone more specifically a woman holding his daughter but something bloomed in his chest as he watched you whispering in her ear making his daughter pull her ahead away from you to him.
He opened his mouth with a smile and extended his arms which his daughter easily slipped into from yours to his. “Hi sweetheart” He gasped as she quickly knocked her head into his chest and curled into her father’s embrace
You handed over her sparkly pink school bag towards Jay which contrasted his attire but you think it suited him quite well and found it more cute.
“Thank you so much for looking after her” He softly said and just hearing his soft voice made your knees want to buckle but stuck with just waving it off as nothing
His eyes looked you up and down and took notice of your clothing. Rather than the comfy clothes you wore the first time he came to pick up his daughter, you wore more formal clothing this time a jacket wrapped around you with your bag hanging off your shoulder and phone in hand.
Your phone vibrated and you looked at it to silently curse under your breath which didn’t go unnoticed by him. “Is everything okay?” He asked and you forgot that he was still there for a second
You replaced your frown with a quick smile, “Yeah, I just have to head out soon for my shift”
Jay’s eyebrows knitted together, “A shift? This late?”
“Whatever can pay the bills” You sadly chuckled and shrugged it off not noticing how Jay stared at you perplexed, he just got off his shift and here you were going to yours
“How are you going to get there?”
“Walking but if I’m lucky I can catch a bus” You explained but noticing time passing by you don’t think the chances are high
Jay remained silent, contemplating something as you walked them out. His daughter stirred awake when you locked your front door. You quickly apologized and tried to soothe her back to sleep but she looked between you and her dad with sleepy eyes. “Where are you going?” Her voiced slurred with sleepiness
“I have to go work” You softly explained but she tried to reach out to you shaking her head
She mumbles something ineligible and you softly giggled before stroking her head leveling with her whispering a soft goodbye again. Jay watched all of this unfold between his daughter and you, the same bloom in his chest forming all over again.
“I can take you there” Jay spoke before being able to comprehend his own thought process,
Your hand dropped to fall to your side. His eyes widened as he stared at your shocked expression
What the hell is he saying? His mouth opened and closed trying to follow up his statement but nothing came out. But his daughter seemed to understand him better than he understands himself. “Yes!” Her energy suddenly boosted up at the thought of being able to spend more time with you
Jay stared at his daughter, shocked at her quick interest, he looked over to you and saw the shake of your eyes before letting out a strained laugh. “I don’t want it to be an inconvenience” You said
“Ridiculous” He chuckled not realizing how it made the harsh thump in your heart hard to ignore, “Please” His voice softer than the first time
How could you say no to him? Well easy. You couldn’t.
Jay’s car reflected his personality perfectly. Nice and sleek, the black shining leather—Real leather—not some fake leatherette to taint his car. His daughter and your happy chatter filling the car as he follows the GPS to your job.
One could easily mistake the dynamic. Easily. His foot slowed down on the brake pedal coming to a stop in front of the shops that illuminated in bright colors, 24 hours.
“24 hours?” He softly muttered not thinking you’d pick up on it but hearing your light sigh he moved from the sign to you who had a small smile
“Like I said. Whatever pays the bills” You said, “Thank you for the ride I really do appreciate it” Your smile growing before turning your body in the seat to reach out your hand to the little girl in the back
“Don’t give your dad a hard time mhm?” You hummed which caused her to pout her lips, trying to reach other to grab your hand to keep you longer but the restraints of her car seat kept her in place
You shot Jay a different smile. Something warm and tense before stepping out of the car, waving goodbye to them before heading into your job with slack shoulders.
How could’ve he have been so naive, selfish, just so stupid. You’ve been taking care of his daughter while he’s been at work. Picking her up, cleaning up after her, making sure to give the proper meals needed all whilst welcoming her into your place easily, allowing her to sleep in your bed even holding back from taking regular scheduled hours to look after her just to end up working ungodly hours just to get money.
Money that should’ve been in your bank account from the first hour you looked after his daughter and yet, he hadn’t paid you a single dime.
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At the same time you heard the knock of the door. “Right on time” You said while standing up and making your way over to the door which you expected her to follow suit
You opened the door just enough, “Hi Jong-” But it slammed shut in front of his face
Your jaw dropped letting out a loud gasp to see his daughter’s hand on the door, a deep frown on her face before clinging onto your leg, shaking her head. “Don’t want to see him” She huffed
Knitting your eyebrows you crouched the door peeling her off your leg to hold her arms. “Now that wasn’t very nice to do but why don’t you want to see him?” You softly asked but you let out strained a yelp when she launched her arms around your neck
You wrapped an arm around her, hoisting her up. “I’m going to open the door okay?” The lack of response from her made your lip tug to the side before opening the door again
Jay rubbing his creased forehead stopped. You gave an apologetic confused smile but he gave a tired smile in return almost as if he expected it. “It’s time to go back home” You whispered into the little girl’s ear but she let out a whine, roughly shaking her head and only held onto you tighter
Confusion written over your face as you tried to peel her off her body into Jay’s but she wouldn’t budge.
Letting out a deep sigh, he ran a hand through his neat hair. The locks slotted through each crack easily, messily ruining the sleek style into something far more loose.
Awkwardly shaking your head from that thought to look at Jay. “Why don’t you come in?” You motioned him inside just like how you always did
How you welcomed him so easily when he hadn’t welcomed you like that showed the constraint he held himself up to. Sighing heavily as he walked in, you closed the door behind him—rocking the girl in your arms who hadn’t looked at her father once.
“Make yourself comfortable Jongseong”
“I feel like we’ll be here for a while”
And after hours of quite literal utter silence in your place, Jay’s daughter finally fell asleep in your arms.
“She’s asleep” You softly whispered to Jay who immediately perked up from the chair, sleepy eyes seeing his daughter happily laying against your body, a content smile on her face while in your embrace
“Oh I didn’t know you were sleeping-”
“No, it's fine. I’m sorry I fell asleep” Jay tried rubbing his hands over his eyes to wake himself up
“Stressful day?” You softly questioned, it was a little invasive but the lack of sleep infiltrated your regular thought process that you spewed anything that came to mind
Jay stayed silent for a moment, his hands moving away from his eyes to look over to your droopy ones. You still managed to have a smile plastered on your face, especially to him.
There weren’t many times he could be vulnerable, not when he has to prioritize his daughter over everything, to make money which is never an issue for him just to make sure his daughter could have anything and everything she could ever want.
A need to fill the void that no material could ever fulfill.
“Just a little” He deeply sighed, his back sinking into the seat again, his arm resting against the armchair
You nipped at your lip, “Want to talk about it?” Each word smaller than the last not wanting to overstep a boundary with him but it was an invisible opportunity that he’s been wanting, waiting for so long
“That’ll be nice”
As you laid Jay’s daughter into your bed, he stayed next to you the entire time. He knelt to the ground, placing a soft kiss on her forehead, mumbling something inaudible for you to hear before stroking his cheek with a saddening gaze.
He tugged at your sheets making sure she was fully covered before turning to face you. You looked at him with complete utter fondness and he stopped his movement. His gaze remained on you for a split second longer than he wanted trying to pull back his wandering thoughts from going deeper.
Clearing his throat, he knelt up from the ground which brought you out from the haze that you were. Your eyes widened as his eyes never left yours and you quickly turned a heel, “I-I have some wine, do you drink wine? Is wine good?” You rambled
Jay stared at your figure. He let out a deep sigh which soon grew into a small smile when you turned around to face him. The light behind illuminating your figure. “Wine is perfect”
Jay sat across from you, his usually strict attire now messed up. Three unbuttoned buttons from his shirt. Sleeves rolled all the way up to his elbow, his hair out of his slicked style to a messy middle part. Legs barely spread open, his lower body pushed forward as he twirled the wine left in his glass.
“She’s upset with me today” Jay sipped drops of wine out of his glass before resting it onto his lap, “I mean I don’t blame her. I promised that her mom and I would take her out but…” He sighed heavily
The mention of the mother made you suddenly tense. The first time you ever heard anything about her, neither did Jay or his daughter ever speak of her in your presence.
You gulped harshly, shifting on the couch. The material under your body is clinging onto your skin somehow. It’s a normal reaction right or maybe you’re overthinking. It must be the alcohol seeping into your system already even though you hadn’t taken a sip yet.
“We both got caught up in work so we had to reschedule but I had to be the bearer of bad news and when I had to break it to her, of course she was upset”
“I’m actually surprised she didn’t complain to you about it. She made it very known that she was upset at me and her mother” Jay sadly chuckled to himself, his eyes trained on the wine glass
“It’s not your fault” He quickly looked to you surprised to see the disagreement of opinion, “I mean- There’s some things that we can’t control”
“Especially when you and your wife work-”
“She’s not my wife”
Defying silence surrounds you and Jay. He was quick to rebuttal the assumption and it tingles something in your gut.
“Me and her mother co-parent. We were young and reckless and everything just happened before we even realized it and now we have our precious little girl” Jay chuckled looking up from the wine glass to look at you, a certain glint in his eyes.
“But we’re not- I’m not married”
You couldn’t look away from his eyes. They were enticing, captivating you deeper into the very thing you were holding yourself back from. Jay’s eyes never faltered from yours and you wondered how.
Trying to snap yourself from the moment to ground yourself in reality because even if he wasn’t married—Just co-parenting, he has to be seeing someone.
“O-Oh I see” You said, his eyes boring straight into yours
You harshly gulped while trying to ignore the bubbling warmth of hope soaring through you. A voice deep inside your mind voicing out your deepest desires.
Feeling as if Jay could see right through you and hear these thoughts made you shift in your spot again. What if he could hear them? What if he thinks it’s strange?
Through the slimmest possible lens, what if he felt the same way.
“Still don’t blame yourself for it… I’m sure she’ll understand sooner or later. Maybe take her out to help somewhat ease the situation until you and uhm her mother can take her out” You offered some advice as best as you could
Jay remained silent listening to you. His eyes finally look away from you and you let out a silent sigh of relief from the release of his hard gaze.
“Taking her out…” Jay’s voice was barely above a whisper, he twirled the wine once again deep in thought
You stared at him, anticipation slipping deep into each crevice as possible in you until he spoke up again with his eyes looking back up to you, “Definitely will have to do that”
There felt more to his words than the surfacing original topic of it yet, you couldn’t place your finger on it.
“You know she talks about you a lot” You were the one to look at him in shock
“Really? I hope it’s good thi-”
“Always” He interrupted taking another sip of the alcoholic drink to slip past in his throat, “It’s always good things” He smiled towards and there was the same warmth you felt whenever you with him grow 10 folds
“I’ve been meaning to give this to you. I’m sorry that it’s taken me so long please forgive me” Jay shuffled through his discarded jacket before pulling out an envelope leaning over to slide it over to you
“Wha-” His shirt fell just enough that if you dared to look longer you could see the necklace dangling and past it was his sculpted chest
You pulled your eyes to the envelope and grabbed it with shaky hands trying to hold back from showing the burning of your cheeks. Your palm clammy trying to open the envelope but slipping every time.
You continued to try opening the envelope but soon Jay’s calloused warm hands engulfed yours. You jumped at the sudden contact but not enough to pull your hands away. Looking up to him, his face is daringly close to yours.
Able to feel his breath brush against yours, you smelled the hint of wine but it made your insides churn in a rather dark way instead.
“Slow doll” His voice slurred and fluttering, “Take it nice and slow”
His fingers clasped over yours, guiding your movement in carefully opening the envelope. Holding your breath as he made your fingers slip into the envelope slowly slotting your fingers to grab the thin paper inside to pull out.
There was a slight shudder rumbling out of your breath causing him to slip up a smirk. Your eyes widen in pure shock as you read over the words on the paper or more like check.
A check written out to not even a hundred dollars but instead 2 thousand dollars.
“I-I- Jong-Jongseong”
Your mouth fell slack as you tried to find any words that could form at least anything in the slightest but nothing came out. “When are you free?” He whispered, his nose bumped against yours, his eyes looking deep and searching in yours
Your hands fell down with his on top, “I’d like to take you out”
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An all black outfit. The button up something you hadn’t seen before. It accented his shoulders that screamed to you, his daring built back that your fingers itched to claw at. His more relaxed but styled hair with the singular strand falling in front.
Jay looked so good but he wasn’t staying. Instead he was going out while you were staying at his place to babysit his daughter like you always do.
And yet, selfishly you should’ve made some lie that you were busy and wouldn’t be able to babysit his daughter.
But the look in his eyes swooned you and the silent hidden excitement from him landed you right on his couch with his daughter plastered against your side having to watch her dad finish getting ready.
“Please call in case of anything. It’s just some job party, nothing important. They always host them” He rambled trying to diminish the past excitement he had, “Actually you know what? I’m not going anywhere, I’ll just stay with you both” Jay said beginning to take off his watch
“Jay” You simply said which made him stop, he looked over to you letting out a deep sigh, “Go to it. When was the last time you were able to enjoy yourself?”
Two weeks ago when I took you out is what he would’ve said if he had the courage to.
That day two weeks ago had been the highlight of his social life that he’s had in years. Always being so focused on working and taking care of his daughter, he never paid attention to anything outside of it until you came into the picture.
He can remember it so vividly almost as if he were to be reliving it again. Your sweet smile greeting him and his daughter. “Hi” He breathlessly let out seeing you
He awkwardly fumbled with his suit as you took notice of his different style of hair different from the usual one you see him in. Instead of the usual strict sleek hair, it was loosely done, his hair moved to each side to expose his forehead slightly.
“Hi miss!” You looked down to see his daughter dressed up as she crashed her body onto your body in a bear-like hug looking up to you with sparkly eyes
Letting out a heartfelt chuckle, you stroked her head before looking up to Jay with a gentle expression. He’s never been bothered with seeing others with daughter and yet, everytime with you, he feels a twinge twist in his chest watching you and his daughter.
“Daddy give her your gift!” His daughter chirped making him flinch at the sudden spotlight on him, you tilted your head in confusion and he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck before straining out a laugh
He pulled a bouquet of flowers from behind his back and your smile dropped before quickly growing into a bigger one. You nipped at your lip to hold it back anymore but it was near impossible.
“Guess the surprise is ruined” He softly murmur but you shook your head at his words and grabbed the bouquet
“It caught me off guard so I think it’s a success” You chuckled before grasping the bouquet, “They’re beautiful” You admired the flowers while he only looked at you
Jay was floored. “Yeah I know” He mumbled under his breath going unnoticed by you
“Thank you Jay” You looked up to catch him staring at you with a certain sparkle as he looked at you, he let out his own smile and if it wasn't for his daughter tugging at his hand, he wouldn’t have gotten out of the daze he was in any time soon
Instinctively looking at his daughter, he gave two fingers for her to hold and she looked over to you with her hand open. Instantly you knew what she wanted and allowed her to grasp your fingers.
“Let’s head out shall we? Our reservation is soon-”
“Daddy worked hard!” His daughter chipped in cutting him off, “Always on the phone talking to people for it” His daughter spoke making the tips of Jay’s ears turn bright red as you stifled a laugh
“Oh did he now?” You raised an eyebrow looking over to Jay who hadn’t said a single thing to rebuttal the accusation, it was true, he wasn’t going to deny it
He wanted everything to be perfect and by the end of it, it was indeed perfect. Jay held his sleeping daughter in his arms, your hand wrapped around his bicep able to feel the slight bulge of it as he walked you to your front door.
Jay felt accomplished. The day was filled with nothing but laughter and chatter minus the exception of sudden silence when many people mistaken them as a beautiful loving family out to dinner which always left Jay in a ringing frenzy until you snapped him out of it everytime.
He didn’t know why the usage of family with you, to have you be mistaken as the mother of his daughter or as his wife left him hot and his heart pattering against his chest.
“Thank you Jay for today. I had such a wonderful time” You smiled brightly and he was growing too accustomed to see your beautiful smile towards him
“It was my pleasure” He gave a tight smile as he felt sudden jitters all around, “I’m sure she enjoyed it too” He gestured towards his sleeping daughter
You nodded your head, a look of contemplation in your eyes before unlocking your door but right before you opened it, you quickly spun around and planted a peck on his cheek before fumbling with the door behind you.
Jay froze for a moment and just before you could slip through his fingers he strangled out a sound to stop you. You turned around, a faint dust of blush heating your cheeks as you lowered your gaze.
He gulped harshly not thinking this far ahead but knowing he had to come up with something, “I-I uhm if you want to of course- I’d like to take you again” He jumbled his words together until some sentence was formed
He anxiously looked at your dropped expression as you raised your head to look at him and he’ll never be able to forget the chuckle you let out as you nodded your head softly biting back your smile.
The beating of his heart reminded him of what it was like to feel like a little kid having their first crush ever all over again. It never bothered him not feeling this in a long time but now being able to experience it again, it felt nice.
And yet, somehow he never managed to gain any courage to see when you were free. Excusing it to be poor scheduling with his working hours and you taking care of his daughter and schooling hours with the very few work hours you snagged just for extra pocket money even when he offered to pay triple the amount he’s been already paying you—Which was nearly 3 thousand dollars daily.
Money is not an issue for Jay, never has been and never will be and he’s more than willing to cover all and any expenses you may have. His only issue is not nearly having enough courage to ask you again.
“Don’t worry about us, you know we always have our own fun here. Go have yours” Your reassuring voice reminded him of reality as you smiled through a fake smile
As wonderful the idea was if Jay stayed in that exact same outfit and didn’t go out for everyone to throw themselves at him. You knew it was unreasonable, these job parties are probably hosted in the first place with hopes that he shows up to at least one of them.
Ignoring the bubbling gnaw in your stomach twisting your stomach inside and out, Jay lets out a defeat sigh, clicking his watch back on and dusting off the imaginary dust off his clothes.
“Say goodbye” You whispered and Jay’s daughter smiled widely waving goodbye to her dad who stared at her and you in complete awe
He walked over, his hand resting on the armchair and leaning down to kiss his daughter on the forehead. In the process the same musk cologne filled your nose making your head dizzy and having him in closer proximity made your heart thump out of your chest.
His side profile was nothing but sheer perfection. You nibbled at your lip as you examined his features up close, always finding yourself in this very position. And yet, he was beyond reach.
Your lips tugged downwards but tried to replace it with a smile when Jay pulled away and looked over to you. His eyes boring into your wavering ones like usual, there was a split moment of hesitance. You gulped trying to ignore the patter of your heart.
Instead of saying goodbye, Jay’s breath shakily fanned yours with a staggering thing smile plastering on his face, “See you soon”
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He expected the party to loosen every fiber in his body but instead his emotions were only heightened ten folds. Every passing second he’s looking at his watch counting down the milliseconds waiting for what seems like a reasonable time to leave.
Sighing heavily, he shakes his head. He shouldn’t have listened to you. He’d rather spend tonight with you and his daughter watching whatever you guys put on.
Swashing the drink in hand not having taken a single sip from the moment he arrived, his arms resting against the rail as he overlooked to see everyone enjoying themselves. He let out another heavy sigh just to check his watch again.
“Mr. Park you look tensed” He looked up to see his employee leaning against the rail next to him giving him a sly smile
Being the boss he is, he dropped his sullen face to give a professional smile. “Do I?” He sucked his teeth letting out a quick stifle laugh
She giggled at his remark like it was the funniest thing ever said, “Is it perhaps about your daughter?” She tilted her head and Jay didn’t like the fact she carelessly mentions his daughter
However, giving the benefit of the doubt, he assumes it must be the alcohol in her system noticing the nearly empty glass at hand.
He lets out an awkward laugh and tilts his head to the side giving no response. “Or is there stuff happening at home? Y’know I would love to help out in anyway I can Mr. Park” The employee rubbed her hand up and down his arm slurring her words together
His eyes followed her movements and carefully pulled his arm away checking the time, “Will you look at that I have to get back home to my girls”
“Your girls?” The employee muttered to herself in confusion but she wasn’t able to dwell on it anymore when Jay took away the glass with a small smile
“Don’t drink anymore tonight. Make sure to rest properly and take some medicine in the morning” Jay nodded his head and easily turned his heel walking past the other employees who all wondered where he was going but none dared to ask
It didn’t take long for Jay to get back to his but on the drive home, he was in pure contemplation. His elbow resting on the open window, feeling the night breeze fanning his face as his fingers played with his lips.
He possibly couldn’t. He shouldn’t even be thinking about you in this light and yet every time he sees you, he feels like he’s experiencing his first crush all over again.
Jay rushed out of his car once he parked it. Standing outside his front door, his hand raised to softly knock against it. After a few seconds of waiting which felt like an eternity. The door opened with your soft voice. “Jongseong?”
Right when the door was opened wide enough, Jay stepped in not forgetting to lock the door behind him. He knew his daughter was fast asleep considering the time. It was just you and him.
You stared at Jay confused at the lack of response from him but you gasped when he suddenly grasped your hands, feeling the familiar calloused feel of them scratching your skin.
He looked deeply into your eyes and you nearly felt your heart burst out of your chest. There’s always been an underlying feeling that’s been infiltrating him from the moment he first met you.
A pretty, money struggling woman that he wants as his to bask away into the sunset and take care of forever.
Jay’s hand held your lower back, his other hand holding the middle of your back flushing you against his. You let out a small squeal the moment your bodies clashed. His breath fanned over yours and the very faint smell of the musk cologne caused a shiver to run up your spine.
You’ve never seen him like this. So raw with emotion, yearning eyes, a tug at his lips. “Ja-Jay?- Jongseong?” You stuttered not knowing how to address him in this moment, your heart thumping out of your chest
He drew in closer, his lips closing in on yours, “Call me Jay. Call me Jongseong. You can call me whatever you want”
“Just call out to me” You felt his lips grazing yours before he softly planted them against each other
Your squished hands shivered but they carefully climbed higher until they reached his sharp jaw as you pushed further into his lips. Jay let out a pleased sigh feeling the reciprocation. His hand on your mid back traveled to grasp the back of your head.
His hands turned your body, his body filling in any empty space that dared to be left behind. Your hands squeeze in between under his arms, grasping onto the behind his shoulders in a desperate need.
Your mind was reeling, not a single thought in it besides the dad—The hot dad next door, Park Jongseong.
His tongue gilded against your lip, begging for entrance. You easily allowed him to explore your mouth. His teeth tugging at your bottom lip in a haste making your squeal.
“Going to have to be a quiet doll” However, he wasn’t sure if he could keep up with his own words, Jay felt drunk when he was kissing you
Your lips grew swollen from how long he’s been kissing you but not once did he stop, the lack of oxygen would never stop him from kissing you.
The tips of your fingers dug deeper into his shoulder causing him to let out a loan groan at the feel. If there was one thing he was sure of, it was how badly he wants to make you his.
Jay’s arms loosened around your body enough to make his hands land on your hips to carefully guide your body deeper into his home that now always welcomes you in.
You allowed yourself to melt in his embrace. Every touch felt like fire against your skin, your arms flailed to wrap around his neck making sure not even for a second did his lip ever leave yours. Your teasing fingertips entangled in his hair.
Jay bit your lip to keep himself silent through the dizzy feeling of your tugs. The moment you reached his bedroom, the door closed shut as he quickly pushed you onto his bed, never detaching his mouth from yours.
His body slotted between your legs, as you wrapped around him. Holding him to keep him close—daring for him to get farther than just a few centimeters away only to drag him back in.
The feel of lightheadedness was finally catching up, through the few milliseconds that you both stopped to change positions were you able to properly breathe but it was taken away when Jay crashed his lips back onto yours.
The same repeated motions felt like an eternity that you never wanted to escape from. Jay’s hands holding your waist tightly while yours traveled playing with the back hairs loving how they run perfectly in between.
Jay’s been kissing you like a starved man who has been deprived of any sense of touch for so long which wasn’t far from the truth. One final tug at your lips before the wave of air filled your lungs through a loud pant.
Gasping for air contrasted the pucker of your lips ushering more kisses. Jay let out a deep chuckle, his thumb rubbing at your sides now planting softer pecks on your lips with a side smile tugging at his lips.
“More” Your voice slurred, “Please”
Your breathless pleas only fueled him further. Who was he to deny your desperate pleas.
“Talk to me. What do you want, doll?” He hummed in the juncture of your neck, his mouth leaving feathering kisses in its wake
The simple nickname leads to the attempt to squish your legs together, forgetting how Jay rested in the middle. He caught your attempt and let out a chuckle.
“You like being called doll or do you like the fact that you’re my doll? Which one is it, mhm?” An unexplainable courage taking over him that he couldn’t remember why he didn’t ask you out from the moment he knew what he wanted
You could feel the smirk radiating off of him and you rolled your eyes which didn’t go unnoticed by him. He sucked in his teeth, his hand grabbing your chin with force to make you look at him.
“Now don’t be a brat” He tooted before letting out a smirk, “Use your big girl words, which is it?”
Already have succumbed to him and his words from the moment you saw him standing at your front door. “Your doll” You softly said
Pleased with the words, he let go of your chin to capture your lips with his, the kiss softer than the first one. His hand gilded higher up your side. You moaned in the kiss, happy to feel his lips on yours again.
Your hands wrapped around his neck to keep him in place, “Let me spoil you” He murmured, your lips grew in a smirk which he felt, his hand tightened on your waist as if in a warming
Pulling away with a heavy pant, you looked up to him with curious eyes which captivated him, “I spend a lot of money you know” You snapped your fingers, “Just like that…” Your voice becoming lower than the last
Jay let out a laugh, his head dropping, “Well can you waste my money as quickly as I earn it?” His head raised when he questioned you
You froze at the retaliation. You nervously gulped before letting out a shy smile. You shook your head. Jay hummed in satisfaction at the response before planting kisses at the side of your neck. “Didn’t think so”
Closing your eyes, you lose yourself in the sensation. Your body contorted with each of his feather kisses, you bit your lip loving each second of his mouth on your body.
While they moved lower and lower while his hands managed to slip under your shirt feeling your burning bare skin under his touch. You let out a louder gasp than intended when you felt his hand cup at your breast through your bra.
Your eyes shot open only to see Jay looking up to you with a gleam and smirk written all over his face. His hand dragged from under your shirt to your legs, his fingertips gliding until he reached the waist of your pants.
You let out a shaky breath, his eyes pleading for permission. You slowly nodded your head. “What a good girl” He whispered the praise before dragging your pants down
The air caught in your throat but quickly noticing how he was leaving the sticky undergarment clinging to you, you stopped his hands from moving any further.
Jay immediately stopped and looked at you with worried eyes. He retracted his hands away and began to pull away but right when he was going to speak, you engulfed his hands to bring them back.
Stretching out his fingers, you looped them under to grab everything. Jay froze feeling the fabric of your underwear at his fingertips. He looked away with wide eyes to you but you gave a reassuring smile before allowing yourself to melt back into his bed.
“Don’t be so shy” You whispered loud enough for him to hear, he let out strained chuckle before nodding his head
He pulled down every piece of fabric in one motion. You unconsciously squished your legs together, “It’s okay. You don’t have to do a single thing. I’ll take care of you” He softly reassured as he pried open your knees to expose you to him
You closed your eyes shut while your hands fisted at his sheets. Jay’s eyes zeroed in on the glistening entrance that invited him to devour. Opening his mouth with a big breath, he went in and placed an open mouth kiss on your core.
You squealed and jumped from the contact but Jay hooked his arms under your legs before you could fully pull away from him. He groaned at the taste of your captivating arousal on his taste buds. His tongue glided over your folds lathering and mixing his saliva with your arousal.
“Jong-Jay” You breathlessly let out as one of your hands grabbed a fist full of hair, tugging at it while Jay’s mouth sucked and sucked practically all wetness from you
Jay’s groan vibrated from your core all the way to your head, infiltrating it with ease. No response to your calls of his name as he continued to lap at your pussy. Shivering with each kiss and suck, you let out a loud gasp when you felt the intrusion of his tongue teasing your gaping hole.
Jay immediately pulled away, the string of saliva connecting his mouth to your soaked smeared entrance, you nearly came to the scene.
“Shhh, you have to be quite” He brought a single finger over his mouth, a smirk played on his mouth seeing the fading string on his lips, his finger glided over his swollen mouth
It collected all that was left over and Jay brought the finger into his mouth, tasting the lovely essence of you. He lightly hummed before bringing his finger out and gliding it over your mouth. “Open” The tone stern made you listen without hesitance
Seeing how easily you opened your mouth to welcome the singular finger in without any resistance had his pants grow tighter. Your tongue swirled around his finger, your eyes never letting go with his. He smirked wildly as he pushed his finger further down your throat.
A dark cloud consumed his mind. The rationality he tried to maintain drifted further away. You tried to take as much as you could, feeling how his fingers went further down.
“Looks like you can take stuff well” Jay sneered, a crazed looked in his eyes before you began choking on his finger, feeling the flesh reaching the back of your throat
Pulling his finger away, your mouth closed in on it, letting it out with a pop when his finger left the warmth of your mouth. His finger now covered in your saliva, he admired it.
Looking back at you only to see the wide hopeful eyes you stared at him with a loopy smile. “Beautiful” He whispered softly to himself before lowering his head back down
Expecting or more like anticipating the feel of his mouth again, you let out a louder gasp at the slip of his two fingers into your gaping hole. “Was just calling to be filled. I couldn’t ignore it” Jay muttered breathlessly as your walls clenched around him, “I promised to take care of you, didn’t I?”
“J-Jay” Your hand tried to grappled with his wrist but the drag of fingers near lying slipping out just to slip back him made you stop
Knuckles deep into you, he pulled out again just to shove them back in, repeating the same motion over and over again. The squelch of your arousal and the quiet pants let out, your mind became hazy quickly, “Quiet doll” Jay whispered
Before you could retain a sense of awareness to respond, his mouth attached to your swollen begging bundle of nerves and the first suck made you let out a loud moan.
Your hand flew to cover your mouth and with wide eyes you stared at Jay who froze. The single beautiful noise he heard made him smile against you.
He looked to see you covering your mouth, worried filling your eyes. Your chest rising and dropping. His freehand traveled up to replace your hand with his own. His thumb stroked your cheek, a sharp look in his eyes.
Maintaining a good pace, his fingers pumped into your welcoming entrance, never forgetting to curl and scissor you open. You let your moans fall into his hand, muffled more and more, the more he pressed down harder.
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head feeling the flick of his tongue on your clit as if it were the sweetest treat to ever exist. The stimulation made you shake and back arch just for him. Breathing as best as you could through your nose with each calculated and careful rub to the nerves had you fisting fisting at his hair while your legs wrapped around his head latching him onto your pussy.
“So fucking sweet” He murmured to your muffled moans, “Give it to me. Be a good girl” He knew you were on the edge, the pulse of you around his fingers was the near indicator, sucking him more and deeper into you
“Jay” You wail in his mouth before lightly biting on his palm to keep quiet as best as you could, “Ja-Jongseong!” You let out louder when suddenly a gush of release shot out of you as you came over his fingers with a tight clench that forced his fingers out of you
Jay moved his fingers over your folds encouraging more of your juices to be released as he slurped as much out of your leaking entrance as he could, not wanting a single thing to go to waste. His tongue only add more to your sensitivity as you body contorted even after it finally came to a stop, “Helping you out” The kisses were only constant while your whines and heavy pants continued, combining together
He stopped with one final kiss before finally pulling away and releasing your mouth from his hand. Your mind trying to comprehend and come down from the new height of pleasure, you let out a loud relieved sigh with a hidden shudder of satisfaction.
Seeing his smeared cover chin and loopy smile he had on his face made your chest flutter, “You okay there?” Jay lightly chuckled at your weak nod, “Big girl words doll. You know how to use them” Jay rose to hover above you
“Fuck me Jay”
Jay smirked letting out a hiss “Wasted no time and used such nasty words”
“Think you can be quiet for me?” Jay hummed trickled down your mind straight to your pulsating hole waiting to be filled
Nodding your head quickly and covering your mouth with your own hands made Jay’s lips tug to the side in pleasure. Jay fumbled with his belt, his eyes never leaving your lingering one and managed to free himself from the restraints of his pants with a strained sigh.
Your eyes widened zeroing in on the prominent bulge that was daring to burst any second, “Let me help you” He whispered replacing your hand with his
Titling his head to the side admiring the scene beneath him. Sprawled onto his messed up sheets that he’ll have to change after this, a daze filled look in your eye and his hand lightly covering your mouth.
Jay used his freehand as best as he could to free his raging hard-on that’s been deprived for many years. Your eyes watched his every move to see how his cock sprung against his abdomen, having your jaw drop. A very much leaking tip and small twitches at the freedom and something that was big—very big.
He felt the slack of your mouth and chuckled to himself feeling the pride swell his chest. “What’s wrong doll?” He murmured when removing his hand waiting for some type of response
Your mouth opened and closed trying to form some type of articulating thought but nothing came out. “Think you can handle all of it? Can you think of taking me all in here mhmm?” Jay’s hand rubbed over your stomach in a slow manner
“Think you can be a good girl and stay quiet while I fuck you senseless?”
You were able to feel the thumping against your chest that you feared he would be able to hear. You don’t think in your wildest dreams would you be able to take someone like Jay. Yet, now in your wildest reality, you’ll try—well more like you will.
You tugged at Jay’s forearm whilst maintaining eye contact with him. The soft tug at your bottom lip as you threaded his hand to cover your mouth. You nodded your head as your eyes looked at him with greed. “Why don’t you find out?”
To your shock, Jay softly tugged his arm away from your hold. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he tapped at your leg, “Turn around”
Seeming getting used to your jaw falling slack, you looked at him in shock but didn’t hear an ounce of sputter in his tone. Not wanting to risk being left all hot and bothered even though you knew Jay wouldn’t dare. You were not testing his patience today.
With a harsh gulp, you flipped your body over. Jay’s hands hovering over your hips before tugging them up before you could fully lay them onto his bed. Your upper body pressed into the mattress, feeling the messed up sheets sticking to the side of your face.
Your hands fisted at the sheets at the new exposure you had for him while your cheeks burned in shyness. He rubbed your hips in awe, pulling one of your cheeks to the side to get a glimpse of the arousal covered crevice. “Is this all for me doll?”
“A-All for you. Just you”
His other hand grabbed the heft into his palm before aligning at your entrance. “Remember to keep quiet” He reminded, “Take a nice big deep breath for me”
You followed his instructions but before you could fully respond you felt the larger intrusion of his tip to your gaping hole making you silently gasp. The stretch compared to nothing you’ve ever felt before and would possibly never.
“Fuck” You breathlessly let out as Jay continued to sink himself deeper
Jay tried his best to not ram himself entirely into the delicious confinement you provided but it called for him—while sucking and welcoming him inside.
“S-shit taking me so good” He muttered as quietly as he could, “Could stay inside you forever”
You felt like you were being split in half just by his cock alone. Your ragged breaths followed after another trying to remember Jay’s advice and not get lost in the sensation.
You peered over your shoulder as best as you could to see how Jay’s looked to where he entered you. The sheer concentration and control made your mind stutter.
Without a warning, in a single thrust, your body jolted forward and you felt full. You gasped loudly, the sheets crumbling more under your clamped hands and body. Your lip shivered as you tried to keep your noises to a minimum.
“J-Jay” Your voice cracked trying to get adjusted to your walls being so stretched out by him
“It’s okay, I got you” His reassurance filled your chest with warmth, taking a few breaths to regulate your body, you weakly nodded your head as you dug your head into the mattress to muffle yourself, “So good for me” He uttered softly tracing your back
Moving his hips once, he quickly got lost in the sense of you wrapped around him. His thrust left you nearly empty only to be filled the next second. Each precise move was calculated to each maximum pleasure possible for you. Nearly able to feel his tip already hitting deep to your g-spot, poking to your insides in a teasing manner.
Your muffled moans fueled Jay further to the edge. He gripped at your hips, his slow pace now picking up only slightly. You were taking all of him and he never felt prouder. “Taking me like such a good girl, so damn proud of you”
Feeling like your head was submerged in water, you relished in his praise. The senses that were always on high alert whenever he was around came crumbling down and became filled with him.
“F-for you” You blabbed against the sheets and Jay managed to hear it making him tap at your lower back as he carefully placed his body onto of yours to melt as one
Each thrust led you further into the mattress, your mouth opened leaving small moans in its wake, leaving your mind blank to only focus on the fulfillment you had inside.
Turning your head to the side, you let out whined filled pants. “Take it doll- Not a fucking sound” Jay grunted darkly into your ear
Your mind tried to recall the words just said to you. But deeper and stronger was the desire to let Jay know how he was making you feel. Feeling you clamp around him harder and the silent pants soon became quiet moans.
“T-Too good. ‘m sorry” You mewled as he continued to thrust into you, “So good, can-can’t help it” Your body meshed as he continued
You took a loud deep breath while a whine rumbled out of your chest when he suddenly stopped his thrust, “As much as I would love to hear you” Jay’s sudden harsh thrust caught you off guard with a yelp, “You need to be quiet” Each word followed by another harsh thrust that touched nearly every thing imaginable inside of you
Your broken wails were muffled by the bedding once again. Seeing the recoil of when he and you meet only fueled a carnal desire in him more. “Gonna breed your sweet pussy doll”
“You’ll be so full of me…Will you like that?” Jay grunts having the calculated thrust embodied your mind and body just for him
His words added to the fire that was consuming your body whole. You nodded your head roughly. “Remember what I said. Big girl words” Jay’s voice lulled into your ear, “Want me to fill you up that’ll you feel it inside of you? Until it’s moving around in you with each step you take?”
The obscene noises only grew louder against his bed as you tried to form a proper sentence to please Jay. “Y-yes” You pleaded as best as you could, “Please Ja-Jay”
“Whatever you ask for doll” Jay snapped his hips harsher, as you clawed at the sheets for support, “Taking me so fucking good- Bet you’ll take everything I give you”
You weakly nodded your head, “Will- F-For you” You murmured
His thrust grew frantic and irregular, his constant grunts filled your ears. The more you clamped around him, not daring to let him go of the welcoming embrace you had around him drew him nearer his organsm.
“Doin’ so good for me” His hand held onto your body when he felt you tightened as you let out the loudest moan of the night as you came all over his cock
Your body shivered as you entered a state of pure bliss. “Take it- Just a little more for me- C’mon doll” His praises slipped passed your gaze and deep into your heart making the clench you had on Jay limit his range of motion but it was enough to have him snap and paint your pink velvet walls white of him.
A low groan slipped his mouth as he halted his thrust to properly fill you to the brim just like how he promised. He watched how you pulsed around him but none of the cum dared to fall out as you took everything he split into you.
Jay’s chest rose up and down, softly pulling out his semi hard cock out of you hearing the small hiss you let out at the sudden emptiness. Your body laid face first on his bed, your body rising and falling with each heavy pant. He smiled softly as he helped you turn your body around to face him.
There he realized his biggest mistake as he saw you masked in an afterglow. Your mouth was slack slightly opened, quiet whines fell out every now and then, your half lidded eyes staring up at him.
His eyes traveled to where he once was inside of you to see the few clumps of cum that spilled out. He cooed before quickly scooping whatever he could to sleek it over your folds before pushing it back in where he left it.
You whined loudly and slightly jolted at your sensitivity being tested when his fingers entered you again. “You did so good for me- Such a good girl for me fuck… I’m so proud of you” Jay planted a messy peck against your cheek, “Let’s get you cleaned up” He whispered
As he was going to remove his fingers out of you, you consciously tightened around them. You lazily shook your head unable to articulate proper sentences that wouldn’t lead you back on his cock again which ultimately failed, “Want your cock” You slurred catching Jay off guard as he let out a strained cough
“Wha-What was that doll?”
“I want your cock again sir”
Like a switch went off in his head. Jay’s demeanor changed. Never knowing the single usage of sir could alter his mind forever. Instantly needing to give you more—more than anything you could ever ask for, wanting to spoil you rotten until you grow sick and tired of him.
He needs to fill you up until you possibly couldn’t hold any more of his cum in you. Softly prying your legs open, he aligned himself at your entrance again gaining your attention at how he easily complied to your request. “No need to ask me twice doll”
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
The faint bristle of wind coming in through the slightly ajared window, the direct sunlight shining through caused Jay’s face to flinch before groggily opening his eyes with a low groan.
Normally, his daughter jumps on his bed to wake him from dreamless sleep during the weekends. Yet, it was different this time. He managed to wake up on his own to no ruckus but instead a peaceful morning.
Attempting to stretch out his limbs to release some of the tension and drowsiness from it, he stops when he hears the muffled grumbles and faint sound of crinkling sheets. Tilting his head to the side, there he saw you and his daughter basked in the sunlight right next to him.
His daughter coddled in between while you laid against his numb arm, both sound asleep. He fondly smiled to himself before placing soft kisses on each of your foreheads, careful to not stir either of you awake. This was all he could have ever dreamed of.
“My beautiful girls”
——
5K notes · View notes
mrsvante · 2 months ago
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Terms of Surrender
pairing: yoongi x reader
genre: idol au, established relationship, pfp (kinda)
summary: he always left a piece of himself behind when he went away. now he’s trying to remember where he put it. a slow burning love letter to quiet homes, messy reunions, half eaten cake, and the way someone’s touch can make a tired soul feel whole again.
warnings: military discharge, emotional vulnerability, fingering, oral f!receiving, light edging, praise kink, yoongi calls you a good girl 🫠, swearing, teeth rottingly tender intimacy, clingy yoongi, post service identity crisis, minor angst with comfort, domestic fluff, one deeply judgmental dog named holly
word count: 4,907
a word from our sponsors 💁🏽‍♀️: i know these drabbles have been pretty much pfp but i got a little emotional with yoongi because we made it!! they’re all finally home & whole. how could i not get emotional?! ughhhh it feels so surreal to know ot7 is back 🥹 anyway, enough of me blabbering..hope you enjoy!
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Yoongi slouched deeper into the backseat of the cab, his head tipped against the cool glass of the window as the late June sun painted long shadows over the city. Seoul hadn’t changed much. Same humming traffic. Same old buildings with half lit signs.
But somehow it all felt a little different today, like the world had edged forward a few paces without him and now he was just catching up.
The driver didn’t say much, which he appreciated. He wasn’t in the mood to talk.
His shoulder ached, an old reminder stitched into the muscle. He rolled it slowly, grateful it hadn’t flared up during the last few months. He’d been careful, pacing himself. Desk work had its own kind of strain, though. Different from physical labor. More like being filed down from the inside out, every second smoothed into the next until time itself lost its sharpness.
Twenty one months. It was a long time to be out of the rhythm of everything.
But he was going home now.
The cab pulled into the underground lot beneath his apartment complex. Yoongi paid, murmured a soft thank you, and stepped out, adjusting the strap of his bag on his shoulder. His fingers tapped over the security pad and the door buzzed open, welcoming him into silence.
The elevator ride was short.
He input the house code into the door, and the smell hit him first.
Takeout. Sweet and salty. Something you knew he liked.
Then your voice.
“~Congratulations, our beloved Yoongi~”
You sang in an absurdly high pitched voice, standing in the middle of the dining room in fuzzy socks, his old sweatshirt, and some too tiny shorts that clung to your ass like a second skin. A small cake sat on the table beside a bottle of Glenfiddich and a cluster of takeout boxes.
Yoongi blinked.
You ran over to him, grabbing his hand before he could even take off his shoes, dragging him into the middle of the room.
“Dance with me,” you demanded, swaying your hips in exaggerated circles, clearly trying to make him laugh.
“I literally just got discharged—”
“Exactly. So you don’t have any excuses.”
He rolled his eyes but let you spin him around once. Then twice. You clapped like it was the best performance of his career and leaned in to kiss his cheek with a loud, theatrical mwah.
Yoongi’s mouth twitched into a ghost of a smile.
You cut the cake and plated a slice. Soft, homemade lilac frosting smudged along the edge. You were beaming as you scooped up a bite for him with your fork.
“Open.”
“I’m not a dog, aegi.”
You tilted your head and arched a brow. “Wanna bet?”
Still, he opened his mouth and let you feed him. The cake was good. Moist and sweet, but not too sweet.
He was tired. Fucking exhausted, actually.
But his heart, his heart had never felt this full.
You nudged his side gently. “You look more dead now than you did on your last day of basic.”
Yoongi groaned, head tipping back. “Because basic was body hell. This was soul death. There’s a difference.”
You giggled. “So… filing paperwork was harder than running ten kilometers with a loaded pack?”
“Absolutely. You ever been stuck with a malfunctioning printer and an angry office ajumma on your ass for six straight hours?”
You leaned into him, resting your head on his chest. “Guess I’ll just have to nurse you back to health.”
“You’re already doing a pretty good job,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to your hair.
Later that night, the cake was half eaten, the whiskey two fingers lower, and the takeout boxes stacked haphazardly on the counter. The lights were dimmed, the room washed in the soft glow of the TV as the drama played on the screen.
You sat curled against Yoongi on the couch, legs tangled with his, one of your hands absently tracing the inside seam of his sweatpants. Holly was nestled comfortably by Yoongi’s feet, occasionally twitching in his sleep as if chasing something.
Yoongi’s arm rested around your shoulders, fingers playing with the end of your sleeve.
The silence had long settled into something easy. He hadn’t said much since dinner, but you didn’t mind. That was just him. He was always more of a slow pour—thoughts aged like wine, shared only when ready.
The main couple on screen kissed under a lamppost. The music swelled dramatically and you snorted.
“They’ve known each other for like four episodes.”
Yoongi gave a soft, amused breath through his nose. “That’s two more than some people get.”
A comfortable beat passed. Then he spoke again, quieter this time.
“I missed this.”
You turned your head slightly against his chest, your ear catching the soft thump of his heart beneath his shirt.
“Missed what?”
He didn’t answer right away. His fingers stilled against your sleeve.
“This,” he repeated, gaze fixed somewhere past the TV. “Normal things. You. Even Holly’s stubborn little attitude.”
You smiled, glancing down at the tiny dog in question. “He’s been moodier than usual with you being so regimented lately.”
“Yeah, well,” Yoongi exhaled slowly, “I’ve been moodier than usual without you.”
You lifted your head to look at him fully, but his eyes were still on the screen, though it was obvious he wasn’t really seeing it. There was a distant kind of sheen in his expression. Like he was still partially somewhere else.
He finally glanced at you, the corners of his mouth tugging faintly. “I think I forgot how to sit still for a while. Everything about that place… the rhythm, the silence, it’s different. Not bad, just…” He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “Sterile. Like life paused and I was watching it through a window. The days bled together. Same halls. Same faces. Same tired conversations.”
You reached up, brushing your fingers along the edge of his jaw. He leaned into it a little.
“But now it’s over,” you said gently.
“Almost,” he replied. “Still doesn’t feel real. I’ve been fantasizing about laying on this couch for months without forcing myself to stick to a bedtime. About your cheesy dramas. About Holly hogging all the foot space.” He nudged the dog lightly with his toe. “But the moment I stepped through the door, it felt like no time had passed and also like a lifetime had gone by.”
He paused. His voice dropped just slightly.
“I’m nervous.”
That surprised you a little. You sat up straighter.
“About?”
“Coming back.” He didn’t mean the apartment. “About being with the guys again. Being BTS again. It’s stupid—I’ve done this my whole adult life. But it’s like… what if the music feels different? What if I feel different?”
You softened, brushing his hair back from his forehead. “You are different. That doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing.”
“I know.” His eyes flicked down. “I just—there’s pressure. Expectations. We’re all gonna be different now. Older. We’ve lived outside of that world for so long, it’s not going to be the same. And I’m scared I won’t love it the way I used to. Or that I’ll want it too much and burn out again.”
Your thumb softly traced beneath his eye.
“You don’t have to have all the answers yet,” you murmured. “Just take the next step. One at a time.”
Yoongi let out a breath. Not quite relief, but close.
“You always know what to say.”
“No,” you said with a small smile. “I just know you.”
He looked at you again, really looked this time, and that quiet, aching fondness was back in full force. The kind that never demanded attention but still managed to take up all the space in the room.
“I want you there,” he said, voice soft and sure. “When it all starts again. Not hidden. Not on the sidelines. Just… with me.”
You nodded, brushing your nose against his before whispering, “Always.”
Yoongi didn’t kiss you right away.
He held your face like it was the last fragile thing in a world made of sharp edges, and then, he kissed you.
You didn’t know who started it, but the kiss deepened before either of you thought to stop it. A soft press of lips became something hungrier, something hot and slow and aching with everything unsaid.
Yoongi’s hand cradled the back of your head, his thumb brushing just behind your ear. The other slid to your hip, pulling you closer until you were practically on top of him. You shifted, straddling his lap fully, thighs settling on either side of his, and the sound he made sent a sharp pulse straight through the apex of your thighs.
His tongue traced the seam of your mouth, and you opened for him. The taste of whiskey lingered faintly on his breath, but more than that, it was him.
Warm and addicting.
You rocked forward just slightly, enough to feel the stiff press of him beneath you.
Yoongi tensed, groaning into your mouth as your hips moved again. The pressure, the friction, had you squirming before you could stop yourself. His hands gripped your hips harder, guiding the movement just a little, just enough.
“Shit,” he muttered, his voice ragged against your lips. “You trying to kill me?”
You smiled against his mouth, breath catching. “Maybe.”
Another roll of your hips and he swore again, this time dragging his mouth to your jaw, then your neck, where he pressed a kiss just below your ear.
And then, a wet snort.
You both froze.
Then came a soft shuffle and another sneeze like exhale. Yoongi turned his head just enough to see Holly sprawled on his side by the couch, staring up at you both like he had just woken up to a live drama finale he definitely shouldn’t be watching.
You burst out laughing.
Yoongi let his head fall back against the couch with a dramatic groan. “This fucking dog…”
“I think he’s judging us.”
“I know he’s judging us.”
Still laughing, you moved to slide off his lap, but Yoongi caught you before you could. In one smooth motion, he stood, lifting you with him. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders automatically, heart thudding.
“Yoongi—”
“We’re taking this somewhere Holly can’t emotionally imprint on the trauma.”
You laughed even harder, your nose bumping against his cheek as he carried you toward the bedroom, his grip firm and certain.
“And what exactly do you plan to do to me in there?”
Yoongi glanced down at you, eyes dark and glittering with intent, lips brushing the shell of your ear as he murmured, “things you definitely shouldn’t do in front of your children.”
You shrieked and hit his chest, breathless from laughter, head tipping back as he kicked open the bedroom door with his foot.
Behind you, Holly let out one last disgruntled little puff of air and curled back into a loaf.
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Yoongi didn’t rush.
He was finally done with his service. There was no need to. And true to himself, Yoongi planned to take his time with you.
Even with weeks of want pressed into the heat between you, even with the taste of your mouth still lingering on his tongue and the shape of your thighs burned into his palms, he didn’t rush.
He laid you down gently, your back sinking into the mattress, the light from the hallway casting warm shadows across your skin. His eyes took you in like he was starving, like he’d been starving for months.
He peeled you out of his sweatshirt with a few gentle tugs. No shirt underneath, no bra.
“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath. “You are trying to kill me.”
You smiled, breathless and hazy, but it faltered when he leaned down and dragged his mouth over your breasts. His tongue was slow, tracing lazy circles around a nipple until it hardened beneath the drag of his lips. Then he sucked, just enough to make your fingers curl in his hair.
Your breath hitched. Yoongi hummed, tongue flicking once more before trailing lower, over your side, your stomach, your hips.
He whispered things as he went, words too quiet to make out. You only caught pieces. So good… missed this… fuck, you’re soft… Like a prayer, or a lullaby meant only for his own ears. There was admiration in every press of his lips. Admiration and hunger and something even more dangerous.
By the time he slipped your shorts down your legs, your thighs were already trembling.
His palm dragged up the inside of your knee, thumb brushing softly over sensitive skin. “Open for me, sweetheart,” he said, low and hoarse, like it cost him to keep still.
You did, thighs falling apart with no hesitation.
The air kissed the wet heat of you, and Yoongi’s gaze sharpened, but still, he didn’t dive in. No frantic desperation. No rush.
Just his lips brushing along the crease of your thigh.
Then again.
Then the other side.
Over and over.
Getting closer.
And then pulling away.
You squirmed. Your hips lifted instinctively toward him, only for his hand to pin you down gently, thumb stroking circles just beneath your hip bone.
“Yoongi…” you whimpered, voice threadbare with need.
He looked up at you, chin tucked between your thighs, hair messy, lips slightly parted—but his eyes glittered all dark and mischievous.
“I’ve been waiting twenty one months to take my time with you,” he said, all soft spoken sin. “Don’t think I’m gonna rush it now.”
Then finally, he licked one long deliberate stripe up your folds.
You gasped, back arching clean off the mattress, but Yoongi only hummed like he was tasting something divine. He didn’t stop there. His tongue moved with devastating precision, every flick calculated, every slow swirl around your clit designed to bring you just close enough.
And then retreat.
And then build again.
He latched his mouth around you, sucking just enough to make your breath stutter, hips rising for more. His grip tightened.
But then, he stopped.
You let out a strangled sound, hips jerking in confusion, in desperate disbelief.
He looked up again, mouth slick, eyes too wide and too innocent to be sincere. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
Your chest rose and fell in sharp bursts. “You—you stopped.”
He tilted his head, mock concern twisting his features into a mask of gentle confusion. “I did?”
“Yoongi—”
“Shh,” he whispered, as two fingers slid deep into you before you could protest.
Your body seized, a cry breaking from your lips as he curled them just right, his thumb pressing lightly to your clit.
“You sound so fucking pretty like this,” he murmured, eyes locked on yours.
He found that spot inside you again, massaging it with slow, steady strokes until you felt it build. All hot, overwhelming, and dizzying.
And then, he pulled away.
Again.
You choked on a sob, hands flying up to clutch at his arms. Your eyes were glossy now, cheeks damp, your whole body trembling from the tension he’d so artfully crafted.
“Yoongi—please,” you whispered, voice broken, barely holding together. “Please, I can’t—”
He kissed the inside of your thigh, lips soft against your skin.
“Yes, you can. You can for me, right?”
His voice was sweet, gentle. But it wasn’t kindness. It was torture.
Another round. Another climb. This time he used everything—his tongue, his fingers, his mouth—driving you to the edge until your body couldn’t tell if it wanted to cum or cry. You were gasping, breath breaking with every stroke, every flick of his tongue, thighs clamped tight around his head in desperation.
Tears slipped from the corners of your eyes, your body pulsing on the edge of release, so close it hurt.
And Yoongi, he looked up at you with that same soft smile, that same faux innocence, like he wasn’t the one breaking you down piece by piece with every touch.
Like this wasn’t exactly what he wanted.
And just when you thought you’d reached your limit, thought you were about to break, he gave in.
Yoongi sat back on his heels for a moment, the soft light casting shadows across his jawline. His lips were still slick from you and swollen, a flush faintly blooming on his cheeks.
Then, without a word, he reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. Exposing the lean muscle and sharp lines of his body inch by inch. He tossed it to the side, not breaking eye contact. His hands moved to the waistband of his sweats next, dragging them down with a roll of his hips.
You propped yourself up slightly, breath catching as he stood to push them all the way off.
“Are you putting on a show for me, Min?” you teased, your voice soft but playful, cheeks still flushed from the cruel bliss of everything he’d just done to you.
He smirked, his cock heavy and flushed, bobbing slightly as he stepped back between your legs. “Don’t act like you’re not the one begging for an encore.”
You laughed, but it slipped into a gasp when he leaned over you, bracing one hand beside your head while the other lined himself up. The blunt head of his cock nudging at your entrance, hot, hard and achingly thick.
His eyes met yours.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, the words barely audible over your pounding heart.
Then he slid inside.
Your cry was half sob, half surrender as he pushed inside slowly in a long, unhurried thrust. Inch by inch, filling you until his hips were flush against yours and you felt impossibly full, stretched wide and warm around him.
Yoongi dropped his head to your shoulder, breath shuddering against your skin. “Fuck,” he groaned, voice cracking on your name like he’d been starving for this moment. Like this was his first breath of air in months.
He didn’t move.
Just stayed there, pressed so deep it felt like he could feel the beat of your heart from the inside. You clung to him, dazed and overwhelmed, trying to process the way he filled you so completely it almost hurt.
And then, he moved.
Slowly.
So slow.
Each roll of his hips deep and devastating. He fucked you like he had all the time in the world, like he was making up for every lost second. His lips trailed kisses across your cheek, your temple, the corner of your mouth. His hands gripped your thighs and then your hips, grounding you as your body molded to his.
Your legs wrapped around his waist, drawing him deeper, your nails scraping down his back as the pressure built again.
“Yoongi,” you whispered, voice trembling.
He kissed you softly. “I know.”
Your moans grew louder, breathier, every thrust coaxing more from you, unraveling you thread by thread. The steady rhythm turned hungrier, hips snapping a little harder, a little sharper, but never losing that deliberate care, that tether of control wrapped tightly around both of you.
You broke with a sob, your body clenching tight around him, your back arching as the pleasure finally tore through you. It rolled in waves, raw and overwhelming, your fingers clawing at his shoulders as if you could anchor yourself to him.
He didn’t stop.
“Good girl,” Yoongi rasped, the words gritted out through clenched teeth. “That’s it. Let me feel you.”
He thrust through it, riding the high, until your body began to tremble under his and your cries gave way to quiet, broken whimpers. He kissed your throat, your chest, lips suckling and biting your nipples as he fucked you. His hands soothed over your hips as if to apologize for the ruin he was leaving in his wake.
Then he finally let go.
He thrust deep one last time, a full bodied groan tearing from his lips as he came. His whole body shuddered against yours, mouth finding the hollow of your throat as he moaned your name into your skin, like it was the only thing he wanted to say.
When it was over, he didn’t pull away.
Yoongi cradled you against his chest, his heartbeat still pounding as your legs slowly slid down from around his waist. He kissed your temple, the corner of your eye where a tear still clung, then ran his fingers gently through your hair.
Your body still twitched in the aftermath. His touch was slow, soothing, grounding you as if he couldn’t bear to let you drift even an inch.
“I’m home,” he whispered.
And this time, it wasn’t a metaphor.
It was a vow.
No drills. No deadlines. No long hours and coming home too mentally exhausted to do anything.
Just this—his skin on yours, your name on his lips, and the silence finally filled by the sound of peace.
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You lay tangled together in the low, amber warmth of the bedroom, skin to skin, legs lazily woven through his. The room had gone quiet again, save for the hum of the city beyond the window and the low, steady sound of your breath returning to normal.
Your skin was cooling but still slick with sweat in places. Every inhale brought the scent of sex and warmth and him. Something earthy, grounding, and entirely Yoongi.
Your head rested on his chest, ear pressed to the steady drum of his heart. The beat was slower now, steady again, but the weight of it beneath your cheek made you feel safe in a way that nothing else ever had.
Yoongi’s fingers drifted along your spine, light and slow and without direction, like his body needed the constant contact to believe you were still there. Every now and then his thumb would pause at your lower back, or brush along your side.
He wasn’t ready to sleep.
Not yet.
Neither were you.
You lifted your head after a while, your cheek creasing against his chest as you shifted just enough to look at him. His eyes were open, soft and dark in the low light, already watching you.
There was something in his expression that made your chest ache.
Something unspoken passed between you. That quiet pulse that always beat strongest when there was nothing left to perform, no ego, no masks. Just you. Just him. Just the knowing.
Then you shifted and climbed over him.
Yoongi’s hands found your hips instinctively, his breath catching slightly as you reached down and guided his still hardening cock inside you again. He was still sensitive, and so were you, but the stretch felt like being wrapped in silk.
You sank down slowly, breath trembling as your body molded to his. No urgency now, or easing. Just the soft, burning ache of connection that ran deeper than anything physical.
He stared up at you like he couldn’t quite believe you were real. Hair tousled. Skin flushed. Lips parted as he exhaled a shaky breath that ghosted over your throat.
“You’re gonna ruin me,” he whispered, voice hoarse and low.
You smiled, leaning down to kiss him.
And then you moved.
You rolled your hips in gentle circles, every glide and shift dragging him deeper, tighter, making both of you gasp. Your hands framed his face, thumbs brushing over the curve of his cheekbones. His eyes fluttered shut, overwhelmed by the intimacy, by the heat, by the way your body gripped him like it knew him.
His hands gripped your waist, fingers digging in just slightly, anchoring himself.
“You feel so fucking good,” he whispered. “Every time, but—fuck—like this…”
You could feel him trembling beneath you, trying to hold still, trying not to lose himself too fast.
“You’re perfect.”
You kissed him again. Softer now. Like a promise.
“I love you,” he said, the words so quiet they nearly disappeared into your skin.
You paused, not from doubt, but from the weight of it. From how much it meant to hear it like that. Bare. Honest. Unprovoked.
He tucked your hair behind your ear, his thumb brushing over your temple.
“I do. I love you. And I’m so fucking happy you gave me a chance.”
“Yoongi—”
“I was scared,” he confessed, voice breaking a little. “Not of you—never of you. Just… of being seen. Of being known like this. You looked at me and didn’t flinch. You didn’t run. You stayed.”
You rolled your hips down again and his breath caught hard in his throat. His head tipped back, jaw slack with pleasure.
“You stayed.”
You kissed him again, this time slow and deep, like you were pouring every ounce of yourself into the space between you. Your hips moved with aching tenderness, each motion drawing you closer to the edge again.
“I think about the sounds you make,” he murmured against your throat. “When you cum. When you break. They’re so fucking beautiful, baby.”
Your breath hitched. The tension building again, coiling low and tight as his hands guided you in that same slow rhythm.
“I’m gonna record them one day,” he whispered, brushing his lips against your ear. “Sneak them into a track. Hide them in the layers so only I know they’re there.”
Your heart thudded hard.
“The breath you take right before you fall apart. That little gasp. The way you cry out my name. I’ll keep it buried in the beat like a secret.”
You clenched around him involuntarily, the pleasure building so high, so fast, your whole body quaked. Your hands gripped his shoulders, face tucked into the crook of his neck.
“Let go,” he whispered. “Let me hear it, sweetheart.”
And you did.
You came with a soft sob, your entire body locking down around him, thighs shaking, chest pressed to his. You shook with it, clung to him like you’d fall apart if you let go.
Yoongi followed soon after, holding you tightly as he spilled inside you, voice catching in your ear as he whispered your name like it was the only word that still mattered.
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The practice room was just how you remembered it.
Long wall of mirrors. Scuffed floors. The faint scent of sweat and long hours spent rehearsing lingering in the corners. And yet today, it didn’t feel like a space for work. Not really. It felt like something awakened. A quiet celebration carved out between return and rebirth.
You stood near the back wall, tucked between two Hybe staffers holding sparklers that wouldn’t light, watching as Yoongi was gently bullied into the center of the room.
He stood awkwardly, barefoot on the polished floor, sweatpants slung low on his hips, a bouquet of white peonies and hydrangeas cradled in one arm and a cake in the other. His ears were red, and he was already muttering protests.
And then they started to sing.
Namjoon sang the loudest. Jin the most off key. Hoseok was filming the whole thing on his phone while simultaneously trying to shove a party hat onto Yoongi’s head. Jungkook laughed so hard he dropped his sparkler, and Taehyung had thrown confetti prematurely and was now trying to brush it out of Yoongi’s hair with no real success.
Yoongi stood in the eye of the storm with Jimin’s arms wrapped tightly around him, expression caught somewhere between exasperated and shy amusement. His fingers curled tighter around the cake as he tried to will down the smile pulling at his lips.
He wasn’t successful in the slightest.
After the last line of the song was shouted more than sung, the room burst into laughter and clapping. Staff members cheered. One of the managers brought out a cooler of drinks. Jin wrapped his arm around Yoongi’s shoulder and gave him a firm shake.
“Welcome back, hyung. You’re officially free.”
Yoongi rolled his eyes, but the look he gave Jin was full of something warm and deep. “Don’t remind me.”
The others gathered around him, pulling him into a loose huddle. There were back pats, too tight hugs, soft words exchanged that only they could hear.
They had all made it back.
Every last one.
For the first time in over two years, BTS stood whole again. Not just in title, but in body and soul. Hair a little shorter. Faces a little sharper. But hearts still tethered together by something that hadn’t faded with time.
“We did it,” Namjoon said, voice thick, gaze sweeping over them all. “All of us.”
Yoongi smiled faintly. “Now we make music.”
They stood there for a long moment. Just the seven of them, the silence stretching wide and comfortable. Like standing at the edge of something new, but not uncertain, familiar.
Yoongi’s eyes drifted across the room.
They found you instantly.
You weren’t even trying to hide, just leaning against the mirror with arms crossed lightly over your chest, watching him like you always did. With that quiet kind of pride that didn’t shout. The kind that just saw him.
For a moment, neither of you moved.
He smiled, just for you. Just a flicker. A promise.
Then Jungkook shouted his name and Yoongi was pulled back into the huddle, laughter erupting again as someone tried to smear frosting on his face.
You stayed where you were.
Watching as he laughed. Watching as he stood surrounded by his brothers. Whole and healed and home.
And when he looked back at you one last time over someone’s shoulder, you nodded.
Go on.
This was always where he was meant to be.
masterlist
dividers courtesy of @uzmacchiato
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xoxolaw · 2 months ago
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Hey, can you do a Seongje x reader. They're in an established relationship. They're good as a couple, the only problem is Seongje prioritizes the Union and getting into fights more than her. He forgets about dates and sometimes doesn't show up, but she doesn't say anything and bottles up her feelings. It gets to a point where she feels single in their relationship and her breaking point could be him getting home really, really late on their first anniversary, not even sending her a text after she decorated and dressed really nicely for it. He only realizes when he sees the decor and she just blows up on him.
I really enjoy your Seongje fics, you are literally the best writer out there🫶
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+ 𝗢𝗡𝗘 𝗬𝗘𝗔𝗥, 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗦𝗧𝗜𝗟𝗟 𝗔𝗟𝗢𝗡𝗘
in which him not showing up for their first anniversary becomes her last straw and she snaps
+ 𝗚𝗘𝗨𝗠 𝗦𝗘𝗢𝗡𝗚-𝗝𝗘 𝗫 𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗘𝗥
angst
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It was 1:47 a.m. when the lock clicked.
Too late for excuses.
The apartment was dark, save for the soft hum of fairy lights still blinking across the living room like dying stars. They lit up a scene that should have been warm, romantic — full of laughter and clumsy dancing and champagne glasses knocked over in joy.
Instead, the candles had long since burned out. Wax spilled onto the cloth. The food was cold. The cake hadn’t been touched.
And in the center of it all: a table for two.
Only one had been waiting.
Seong-je stepped inside, the door shutting behind him with a soft thud. He rolled his shoulders, muscles sore from a fight he shouldn’t have been in, knuckles still raw and bruised. His phone was dead. His shirt was wrinkled. His mind was loud.
He didn’t notice it at first — the effort. The care.
The quiet grief suspended in the air.
But then his eyes landed on the table. The decorations. The wine. The folded note with a single sentence:
One year today. I made your favorite. Please don’t be too late.
His chest tightened. His stomach dropped. He swore under his breath. She had been here. She had waited.
And he hadn’t even sent a damn text.
The bedroom door was cracked slightly. Not enough to be an invitation — just wide enough for him to hear the distant sound of muffled breathing.
She was awake.
Of course she was.
He knocked once, hesitated, then pushed it open.
She was curled up on the far side of the bed, dress still on — the one she had shown him in the store weeks ago, the one she said she might save for something special. Her hair was undone now, curled strands limp against her cheek. Her eye makeup had smudged, dark shadows beneath her lashes.
It wasn’t just that she’d fallen asleep waiting. She had waited so long, she gave up.
“…Hey,” he said softly, voice hoarse. “I’m— I didn’t mean to—”
She sat up. Slow. Silent.
No greeting. No affection. No warmth.
Only exhaustion.
The kind that didn’t come from staying up late — the kind that came from staying in love alone.
“Did you even remember what today was?” she asked. Her voice wasn’t angry. That somehow made it worse.
Seong-je opened his mouth. Closed it again.
“…I—”
“Don’t lie.”
Silence.
She looked at him, really looked at him — eyes tired, lips trembling. Her voice was flat, steady in that dangerous way people sound when they’ve rehearsed their heartbreak too many times in their head.
“I sat there for five hours, Seong-je.”
“I know,” he said quietly.
“No, you don’t.” Her voice cracked, finally. “Because you weren’t there. You were never there. Not for the date I planned last month. Not for movie night. Not when I waited in the cold for forty minutes after class and told myself you must’ve been stuck in traffic. Not tonight.”
Her hands curled into fists in her lap.
“You fight for everyone else. You show up for them. Bleed for them. Run the whole damn Union like it’s your religion.”
She laughed. Bitter. Broken.
“But when it comes to me, I get the leftovers. The forgotten texts. The broken promises. The missed anniversaries. And I keep telling myself it’s okay because you’re tired or busy or trying to protect me from your world—”
Tears welled in her eyes, but she didn’t blink them away.
“—but the truth is, you made a place for everyone but me.”
Seong-je didn’t speak.
Because she was right.
And maybe part of him had always known it.
“I can’t do this anymore,” she whispered, voice shaking. “I don’t want to be the girl who’s constantly left behind and still waits like a fool.”
She stood, brushing past him, shoulders trembling.
He reached out — fingers ghosting over her wrist — but she stepped away.
“I spent all night trying to look perfect for you,” she said. “But maybe I should’ve just learned to stop expecting anything at all.”
And she left him there — standing in the doorway, surrounded by all the pieces of a night that could’ve been beautiful.
The wine. The food. The candles.
And one ruined anniversary he’d never get back.
✮⋆˙
She didn’t text the next day. Didn’t block him. Didn’t rage. Just silence — and somehow that was worse.
Because she had never been the type to go cold.
Even when she was mad, she used to blow up, call him names, tell him to get his shit together. Yell and roll her eyes and shove his shoulder and mutter, “You’re lucky I love you, asshole.”
But now?
Nothing.
Not a text.
Not a knock.
Not even a seen-check on the messages he sent.
It was like he no longer had access to her world. And he hated how much he deserved that.
✮⋆˙
Day 2.
He left the bag at her door. Didn’t ring. Didn’t wait. Inside it: her favorite ramen, the earrings she lost, and his lighter — the one he always swore was lucky, the one he never let anyone touch.
A note, just one line:
“I’ll earn my way back. Even if it takes forever.”
✮⋆˙
Day 3.
He came to campus. Waited outside her lecture building. Watched the students file out — until he saw her.
She looked exhausted.
Pretty as ever. Sharp in the eyes. But quieter now. Dimmer.
He stepped forward. She walked right past him. Didn’t even look up. And that — that gutted him more than any punch he’d taken.
He didn’t follow. Just stood there like a ghost in her periphery. But he was back the next day. And the next. And the next.
✮⋆˙
Week 1.
He started walking behind her — a few steps behind, no words, no expectations. Just there. Rain or shine.
Sometimes she turned around and gave him a flat look that said "don't test me." Sometimes she ignored him.
But she never told him to stop. So he didn’t.
✮⋆˙
Week 2.
He left things on her doorstep now and then. A wrapped sandwich when he knew she had class through lunch. Heat packs when the weather dropped.
A note that just said, "I know I broke something. I’ll wait until you let me fix it."
She didn’t reply. But she didn’t return them either. And that was enough to keep him going.
✮⋆˙
Week 3.
She finally spoke. Not kindly.
She saw him waiting at the gates again and snapped, “Don’t you have a gang to run?”
He blinked. “I’m here.”
“Yeah?” she scoffed. “Now?”
The bitterness was a knife. But it was honest. And he deserved it.
He nodded once. “I’ll keep showing up. Even if all I get is that.”
She stared at him. Then walked away.
✮⋆˙
Week 4.
She came out of class in the pouring rain. He was still waiting. No umbrella. Hoodie soaked. Bag slung low. His knuckles bruised again — not fresh, but healing.
She didn’t say anything. But she held out her umbrella. Wordlessly. He didn’t take it. He stepped beside her, shoulder brushing hers lightly under the small canopy.
They walked in silence. Back at her place, she turned to him. “You think just standing there every day makes up for months of being absent?”
He shook his head immediately. “No.”
She folded her arms. “Then why are you still doing it?”
“Because I finally figured out that love isn’t just saying the words.” His voice was quiet. Rough. “It’s remembering the date. It’s showing up when you say you will. It’s choosing you — every time.”
He looked her straight in the eyes. “And I didn’t. Not when it counted.”
A long silence stretched between them. Rain still trickled down from the edge of the umbrella. She swallowed, lips trembling — but no tears this time.
Only tired anger.
“I wore that dress for you,” she whispered. “I lit every candle. I waited until midnight because I thought you’d come rushing in with flowers and some dumb excuse and I’d still let you hold me anyway.”
Seong-je didn’t flinch. Didn’t speak. She let the umbrella drop between them. The rain started to soak her hair.
“I’m not some consolation prize you remember once the fighting’s over.”
“I know,” he said. “You’re the only person who ever made me want to stop fighting.”
That got her.
She stared at him for a long moment. Her eyes no longer sharp — just… dull. Worn out.
But something inside them shifted.
She turned without a word and opened the door to her apartment.
Paused.
Then said, without looking back:
“You can come in. Just don’t expect forgiveness yet.”
And he didn’t. But he stepped inside anyway. Not as her boyfriend. Not yet. Just as someone trying — finally — to stay.
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+ 𝗔𝗨𝗧𝗛𝗢𝗥'𝗦 𝗡𝗢𝗧𝗘 + 𝗠𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧
really hated writing this 😭 feeling single in a relationship was so real
+ 𝗧𝗔𝗚𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧
@sunnyophelia @atztrsr @snoopsyka @cayrelyra @symphonies-of-poenies @ghost-reine @ginaaaa29 @gacktsa @inom17 @coffee-ii @dna-black-and-blue @intoanothermind @satoru2716 @kyungjunnies @changbinkisser @mishh2728 @0waves2earth @ashayein @janjoonty @ineed-myspace @loveg4lore @itzcandy
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rafeslvbug · 1 month ago
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CHAPTER 2 - maybank!reader series
the country club is teeming with ladies, in matching sets and dresses worth the amount of tips you’d get in a month. usually, you’re able to muster some energy for the obnoxiously rich assholes, catering to their every need with a smile you have to sew on before stepping out. today? not so much.
you push through the crowds of women clamouring around a two person table to chat with leisure, not minding if you knock them into the trays of food or if the margarita swishing in the glass in the your hand spills over onto their outfit. you deal them with brash “excuse me”’s that are handed long after they should be, ignoring their offended gasps and slamming glasses down onto the tablecloths so that the men feel like tucking their tips back into their bursting wallets, something they’d do if the glare you gave them wasn’t just as sharp.
collapsing behind the bar, sofia settles in front of you, her arms crossed over her chest as she asks, “you okay? you’re looking a bit..”
“exhausted? drained? dead?” you list off, closing your eyes and taking in the cool air blowing from the ceiling fan above you.
“well…yeah,” she starts cleaning up the spilt drinks and melted ice on the countertop, waving bye to customers as they leave and offering polite smiles like they’ll earn her more money.
“i’m just tired,” you tell her, forcing yourself up and securing your apron around your waist tighter.
“you’ve been tired a lot lately..” sofia muses, giving you a glance that says she feels there’s something more going on.
“it’s nothing, really, i almost wish there was something wrong but, no,” you murmur, gaze catching a man who raises his hand in the mass of people, waving over a waitress. you’re about to drag yourself over until sofia holds out her palm, stopping you as she takes it herself. “i’ve got it! just man the bar okay?” she calls back to you and you nod, leaning against the wooden surface, rubbing your eyes and then tapping your fingers against the surface as you wait for the next customer.
when he approaches, you rather wish he hadn’t. rafe saunters up to the bar, lazy smile on his face, same damn sunglasses on. he leans his forearms on the bar, before teasing, “well don’t you look like a daisy, maybank?”
“and you look like an ass,” you retort with the widest faux smile you can manage - you’ve been reported for this kind of behaviour before, although not by rafe.
he lets out a whistle, low, mocking, “mind your tone there, i could dock your tip.”
“what would you like to drink, rafe?” you dismiss his gentle threat, staring at him in the hopes it might make him disappear faster. unfortunately, the glares that threw off the other men, seem to only spur rafe.
“just a beer,” he glances behind him at the small queue forming from his ease, disregarding them all when he turns back to you.
“bottle or glass?”
“don’t be lazy, glass.”
“i’m not being–“ you sigh, not bothering to finish your sentence and grabbing a fresh glass, filling it with beer from the tap. “to your liking?” you ask, holding up the glass with the yellow liquid inside it.
he hums, contemplative before letting you slide it across the bar, “i guess it’ll do, next time less foam though okay?” he walks back to his unsavoury group of friends, leaving you to roll your eyes and curse him to no end.
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driving out of figure eight to the cut only goes to show how neglected the working class are, stuck in their shacks, not even allowed an inch of the manicured grass they toil away to maintain. the sight’s always been a horrid reminder of how trapped you are, imprisoned in a life of state school, teachers who don’t care and adults who are looking to arrest you. the car rumbles with every speedbump, like the structure of it might collapse around you, or the wheels dislodge and roll down the rocky roads of the cut.
and despite the car’s lack of speed, you still can’t break fast enough.
pulling off to the side of the road, hastily undoing your seatbelt, you rush out of the car to the blonde boy sitting on the curb, groaning and clutching his side. his shirt’s stretched at the neck. knuckles purple and yellow.
“jj! is that you?” you call out, letting out a small gasp, nearly stopping in the middle of the road when you see him. blood from his lip, cheekbone bruised, nothing you imagine, in comparison to the bruises that must be over his body.
“sorry i uh– sorry, y/n..” he sighs, chuckling sadly and dropping his head. he holds out his arm for you.
“sorry for what?” you hook your arm around his torso, supporting him to the car and helping him to lay across the back seats. your stomach stirs with unease. millions of possibilities, but only one answer. and you know it clear as day.
“goin’ back there, i told you not to, i know, and then i did it myself i just thought i could get our house back, our shit back cuz it’s not his, none of it an–“ his rambles lead you to tighten your grip on the steering wheel once you’ve got in the car, familiar with this conversation where he tries to be the hero, do what’s right and gets beaten for it. it’s happened before. despite your begs that he just stop trying.
“stop apologising, it’s not your fault,” you murmur, starting the car up again and driving along the roads, sun beginning to dip below the horizon.
“it’s just, i saw him at the party.”
“what party?” your brows furrow, glancing at him through the mirror.
“the one you didn’t want to go to. fresh outta wherever the hell he’s been - prison, i think - drinking, back to his old ways an’ wearing my shirt.”
“jj..” you pull into the driveway of a takeaway joint, rolling down the window as you approach the speaker.
“i liked that shirt! and he had no right!” he groans in the background during your order, you buying two burger meals with half the tips you gathered today. it’s a rare expenditure, eating in one of the more expensive joints, yet times like these have always called for it.
stopped in the parking lot, having now joined him in the backseat, jj keeps talking through bites of his burger and sips of his soda. “i wanted to be a good brother, man of the house and what not.”
“you are, jj. and that house? it’s got nothing in it worth trying to save. the chateau? and the pogues? it’s all we need. we stay away from him, okay? keep our money safe, keep our stuff safe, it’s what you said yourself,” you whisper, eating a fry dipped in your vanilla milkshake.
“y’know he came up to me?” your stomach drops. the kind of feeling you dread. the type of news you hate to hear. life was better when luke ignored you two, not when he involved himself in your lives, because it only meant he was fishing for money, and bound to disappoint. the injuries covering jj were proof of that.
“at the party?” you offer him one of your fries, letting him take it from your hand. now you wished you had gone. now jj was grateful you hadn’t.
“yeah, think kie scared him off,” he mumbled, though you knew that that meant something else. luke never took attitude lightly. never took your friends lightly. or the fact that people knew what he did.
“hm..”
“i’m sorry y/n,” he apologises again. you can see how his lip trembles slightly. hands unsteady around his food. head down.
“don’t be..we’ll be okay..” is all you murmur, leaning forward to wrap your arms over his hunched form. though you know you’ll be anything but if he’s around. at least you have each other. all you have is each other.
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sirens sound, short, to grab your attention during your walk towards work in the morning. you freeze. mind racing with every illegal thing you could’ve possibly done to get called over.
“y/n! stop standing, come on!” shoupe calls out and you reluctantly shuffle over to the open window of the cop car. it’s nothing with you - you hope. perhaps jj? or luke? one of the many problematic boys in your life.
“somethin’ wrong officer?” you try to be polite, voice meek while you silently pray that it’s the best case scenario.
“i’ve known you too long for you to be actin’ like that, come on get in the car kid,” he sighs.
you glance around. empty streets. no one here. “am i in trouble?”
“no, no, not at all, just gotta talk.”
you slip into the passenger seat of the car, without asking more questions, only doing so when you were situated inside. he rolls the windows up. “why couldn’t i speak outside?”
“figured you wouldn’t want to.”
“why not?”
“look kid..i know there’s a lot you an’ your brother ain’t telling me,” he starts and you know where it’s going. it’s not the first time shoupe has begged jj to file a complaint against your dad, tell the police everything and get them somewhere safer.
jj’s refused. each time.
there’s no saying where’d you get put - off of kildare? some kooks? in an adoption agency until your an adult and kicked out? shoupe continues, “i saw jj yesterday. down the street, didn’t look good, now what are you gonna tell me about that?”
you blink towards him, then away. “he got in a fight.”
“with your dad?”
“with another kid,” the lie slips off your tongue easily, and you know shoupe doesn’t buy it. but he has to.
“you’re gonna kill yourself like this,” he warns, and he’s told you this before. every time he drives past you, he gives you a look as if to say it too. signs you choose to ignore.
“no, we won’t.”
“you will kid, men like that? they don’t care.”
“he won’t. he needs us,” you murmur, an unfortunate truth. he does need you, just for your money.
“and when he doesn’t need you anymore?”
“i don’t know,” your voice crumbles a little before you can rebuild it. the future seems so far, when so much is happening right now. you hate to think of all the ways it could get worse.
“your brother’s stubborn, you are too, but jj’s..well quite frankly jj doesn’t have the brains you do,” shoupe looks at you, aging a few years from this conversation alone, then adding, “don’t be stupid. ask for help, i could do something.”
you fall silent. voice soft, you say, “it’s nice talking to you shoupe, have a good day.” the door shuts behind you as you resume your journey to work, blue duffel adjusted on your shoulder. shoupe’s resigned, but it’s all he can do to simply monitor. monitor and hope one day either of you comes to your senses.
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you tap your fingers against the steering wheel of the golf cart, waiting on rafe, topper and kelce as they swing their clubs about. you’ve refused to service them too many times this week, and your manager forced you to take this, not wanting to upset big donors.
toppers voice, smug and headache inducing rings through, snapping your attention his way. “y’know y/n, call me crazy but weren’t you in shoupe’s cop car this morning?”
shit. you had checked every ten seconds to make sure no one was there, and somehow he still slipped through. topper had a tendency to get his sweaty hands on information and spread it like wildfire; now he had information on you. the type that would make you lose your job, even if nothing went wrong.
“so what?” you bite back, fingers flexing around the wheel.
“careful..d’you want your tip or not? at this rate, you might need it, start saving for your bail money,” topper chuckles, receiving an encouraging nod from kelce. rafe hangs back, leaning on his golf club, then topper calls out, “so what’d you do?”
“i did nothing.”
“is it embarrassing?”
“some more petty theft?” rafe’s voice pipes up, knowing smile on his face that you want to slap right off.
“are you done? there’s people waiting,” you point out the deren couple, husband and wife in their mid forties with their son, your age, known figures on the island, and surprisingly neither much of an asshole.
“it’s okay honey, they can take their time!” mrs deren responds, having heard the whole conversation and not wanting to stir things up more. but you see the sympathetic look she offers you.
“no no! they’re being rude, and i have to respect all customers! come on!” you usher them into the cart, and rafe briefly glances at the derens before pushing topper forwards to the cart.
“what’s this like a power play, we mention your cop interaction, you embarrass us?” topper laughs, leaning forward to speak closer to your ear.
“country club rules, top, being a good worker,” you grit out, golf cart jolting forwards as you move on to the next tee.
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three hours later, listening to the drone of topper’s voice, kelce’s dumb chimes and rafe’s drawls, you were finally able to retire the visor in the staff room. rummaging through your duffel, you pull out your phone, lighting up to see kie’s text :
kie: coming to the boneyard tonight?
your brows pinch, not even realising there was a party there tonight.
you: well..i promised jj i’d come to the next one.
kie: off work yet?
you: now
kie: okay come to my place, we’re picking out outfits there
you: alright, be there soon
you type it, even though you’re anything but excited. kie’s parents hate jj, accustomed to making little comments to each other like “nothing like her brother” or “no..maybe we were wrong, both a bit reckless” like you can’t hear. no matter how many daggers kie shoots at them, they never do seem to get the message to not say anything.
bag slung over your shoulder, head down, you walk along the pavement to your car. “hey,” an unfamiliar voice sounds out, and you look up to see the deren boy, standing by the wall.
“hi?” you pause, unsure as you stop near him. you don’t know if you should have kept walking. jj certainly would have dragged you out by the arm, dealing with boy later, muttering something about rich assholes preying on the pogues as a charity case. a worldview that was flawed majority of the time.
“sorry, i– uh, couldn’t catch you earlier, had to wait out here they said you were going home.”
“they?”
“sofia? your– co-worker? friend?” he gestures back towards the country club, where you can vaguely see sofia navigating through the messes, having only started her shift recently.
“oh..is there a reason?” you ask, looking back to the tall boy, dark brunette curls falling over his forehead, over vibrant green eyes.
“sorry, yeah, i’m cole,” he sticks his hand out, still half-leaning on the wall, “nice to meet you.”
“you too, i’m y/n,” you shake it, a small chuckle escaping your lips. you’d seen him a few times. spoken to him a few times. never exchanged names much, just little laughs.
he rubs the back of his neck, sheepish when he mutters to himself, “this is dumb,” before clearing his throat and saying, “i just wanted to ask if you were free tonight?”
your eyes widen. mouth falling into an ‘o’.
“shit i’m sorry! i just– i’m not good at this, you’re pretty, and i’d like to talk to you more..y/n..” he facepalms, grinning and leaning his back onto the wall in embarrassment.
the sight makes you laugh. crossing your arms over your chest, hugging your zipper closer to you, you nod, “well i mean you had a way of going about it.”
“yeah, sorry.”
“no, no it’s okay,” you shake your head. it was sweet. how his cheeks flushed a little red. how he waited. “i’m busy tonight,” you add, and cole nods.
“ah i get it, that’s okay i figured as much, thought i’d try anyways,” he offers you a soft smile. you’re about to walk away, he has.
but then you stop.
pursing your lips together, trying to seal what’s going to come out your mouth. sarah’s always saying you need to get out there, try the dating game with non-asses.
“actually..cole..” you slowly turn back around, to find him with his hands stuffed in his pockets, eyebrow raised.
“you know the boneyard?”
his forehead creases for a moment, then relaxes and he nods.
“there’s a party there tonight, you could find me there..”
“huh,” he smiles, breaking into an ill-contained grin. “what time?”
“there’s no time, just when the beach looks busy..” you shrug. he’s never been before, you can tell. but he looks like he’s willing to try, and he might like it. or he might find the ralph lauren polo he’s wearing, tan trousers and brown dress shoes a bit unsuitable for the sand. you just hope he has better clothes.
“alright then y/n, i may, or may not, see you there.”
your lips tug into a smile, nodding barely and briskly walking to the car, trying to hide the blush creeping onto your cheeks. now, you really do have to pick out a good outfit.
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taglist: @starkeyjoseph @rafesbabygirlx @slut-4-rafey @lanaslushworld @littlelamy @rain-likes-purple @sunny1616 @csturnioloswifey @silkylovey @supasolaa @octoberbxbyy @rafeobx @toomanywhitelies @jamesbeaufortismylife @vanessa-rafesgirl
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herestoallmytgirls · 26 days ago
Note
bratty bottom dani x brat tamer stone top reader... 👁️ Hai
Ahhhhh thank you so much for my first ask!! I will write something amazing for u 💞 I got u I got u diva let’s mf go! Sorry this took ages to do I was seeing Kendrick Lamar today and I was helping co-write a screenplay lmao (this is not proofread just straight from my brain <3 (Idk if you want f!reader or gp!reader soooo I’m going for f!reader with a strap because awooogahhhh)
Payback - Brat!Daniela x Dom!Reader
themes - smut, teasing, punishment, brat taming, degradation, strap-on, riding, collar and leash, control, sadism and masochism
Dani was always one to push your buttons, finding any and every way to make your life a little more difficult. Whether it was teasing you in front of the other members, jesting at you with a lopsided smile, or the little pranks that she would pull with the VERY enthusiastic help of Manon and Lara; she was always a ‘little miss trouble’.
However, what the other girls seemed to miss was the more maliciously devious side of Daniela, the one that ran her perfectly manicured nails up and down your blanket covered leg during movie night, or the way she would breathe hot, sexually charged teases into your ear when you stood beside her at a charity event. She was always one to push the envelope a little too far when she was sure eyes weren’t prying; even when they were at times.
Usually, it would be the same rhythm that you and the Latina set into: she misbehaved, you punished her, and less than a week later she would be back to her antics, trying to see what would make you break your unwavering cool in the face of her relentless flirting and seduction. This time though, this time she had went too far. This time, she was going to get what she truly deserved.
It had all started that morning. You and the other girls were sat around the breakfast table, easy conversation passing between you all as shovels of cereal were mouthed and coffees were used as warmers for cold hands. Everyone was breezing through the early morning traffic of 7 girls living in one house. Megan was currently lamenting to you about a game of valorant she had lost the night before, and you were giggling at the comical dismay cast over the girl’s face, her head in her hands like she had been told she had to choose between two family member’s executions. Your chuckle stopped dead in your throat however when you felt a pointed foot reaching from your ankle up to the inside of your left knee, tracing a steamy route up and down the exposed skin - you were sat in shorts naturally.
Daniela, ever the culprit, was sat across from you, seemingly caught up in a conversation between herself, Yoonchae and Sophia about practice later, but you saw the gift of mischief in her eye as she darted a look at you from the side. You could see the shadow of a smirk on her face as her foot traced from your knee further up, grazing the inside of your thigh before dropping back down. The dark, unimpressed look you shot to the girl was intimidating, but didn’t deter her, nor did it deter the warmth in your stomach and the beginnings of wetness in your pants. The arousal that was simmering inside you because of her tactical touching was unravelling your mind with every trace of her foot, and you knew then that it was going to be a long day - you couldn’t even call something off to punish her in private because you had a packed day of practice for a new song.
The second strike came during said practice. 3 gruelling hours of dancing the same steps to clean them perfectly, to make sure no mistakes were found, and all of you were exhausted. Every girl was panting, Megan was sprawled out off the cold floor like a starfish, Manon was fake sobbing about “slave labour” and the other girls were agreeing. Everyone but Daniela, who sat int he middle of the floor practically glowing - this was her forte after all, she lived for the stage and specifically for dancing. You were the exact same, but Daniela had more stamina when it came to dancing. Maybe not in other aspects.
After a quick 5 minute break, the practice continued, moving onto a pairing dance sequence. Each girl was to break into pairs during the bridge, bodies close and dancing together sensually as Sophia serenaded the crowd with her beautiful voice. The only issue was that Daniela was your partner for this sequence, and god was she making it difficult. Every single rerun of the choreography, she got too close. Her back to your front as you grabbed her hips for the routine. Every damn time she pushed her warm, rounded ass into your own hips, grinding slightly in a way that seemed too steamy for choreo - it seemed everyone wasn’t focusing on the two of you though as Manon was flustered about the steps and her partner Lara was roasting her relentlessly for it. Which made it worse, as it gave Daniela more leverage. “What do you think you are doing?” You growled into her ear, hands planted onto her hips as per the choreo but your fingers dug into the skin around her waist above her low rise sweatpants. “I have no idea what you are talking about mommy” Dani teased, and it made you go completely tense for a second. She knew fine well not to call you that in public, in case the other girls heard. Trying to keep your composure, her head turned to you with a falsely innocent flutter of eyelashes, and you sent her a piercing glare “you are going to regret your actions” you said through gritted teeth. And just like that, both of your eyes snapped to the forward to catch everyone else getting into formation again to re-run the sequence for the umpteenth time.
The third and final straw was after practice, at the house. The rest of practice had gone on uneventfully bar Yoonchae hilariously turning everyone on Lara for being a “bully”. Now, the girls were all sprawled out in the living room, either resting for the rest of the day or taking a short break before some individual schedules. The atmosphere was relaxed and casual conversation was flowing between some of the members, but one this Young noticed was that you couldn’t see Daniela anywhere in the room. Where was she? “Where did Dani go?” You asked, and Manon replied casually, pointing toward the stairs with her thumb .“oh she said she was tired, so she’d went for a nap” as soon as she said those words, trying to seem as casual as you could, you got out of the seat you were sat in and decided to go and pay her a little visit. Seeing the physical state of the girls, you didn’t think they’d be getting up any time soon anyways.
You walked up the stairs to the front of Manon and Daniela’s shared room, and raised an eyebrow inquisitively at seeing the door was closed. You hummed in knowing, as there was only really a couple of reasons any of the girls every closed their doors, and it was usually because of sadness, needing alone time or because they had a boy or girl over. You could guess exactly which of the there it was and it caused your eyes to cloud over in lust. You placed your ear up to the door, and sure enough. You heard the pathetic whimpering and groaning through the wood. “Mmmph….Mommy….please umph” Daniela’s pleads and moaning tickled something deeply inside you, but she knew that she wasn’t allowed to do anything of that unless you weren’t around to take care of her. She had consistently throughout the day pushed your buttons, and this time you had had enough.
Without warning, you burst the door open, showcasing a disheveled and unkempt Daniela, beautiful curly hair splayed across the pillows and a bitten arm placed over her mouth to muffle the sound of her moans. Her hand which was hurriedly stuffed in her underwear stilled as soon as you opened the door, and you could see the seeping wetness clinging to the fabric there, it had even dribbled down to her thighs slightly, you could see the sheen of slick coating the innermost part of where her thighs met her crotch. Daniela’s eyes were blown wide in both surprise and worry when she saw you, recognising the dire situation she had just found herself in, because she knew she was in for it and there was no getting out of it now.
Silence overtook the room as you snapped yourself round the other way and closer the door, pressing the lock and sauntered over to the side of the bed to grab the wrist of the hand that was still stuffed in her underwear . She didn’t even seem to want to gulp under your intense gaze. “What do you call this pretty girl?” You said, sickly sweet smile gracing your lips and you tugged the wrist out of her underwear to expose the embarrassing amount of wetness that was coating the girl’s fingers. “Well, i just thought I’d take care of it since you haven’t” Daniela snarked, eyes dark with lust and the curl in her lip teasing you, taunting you.
You felt your jaw clench at the reply, fist digging into her worst at her bratty attitude. “Knees. Floor. Now.” You demanded, clearly in no mood for her continued misbehaving. The lilt of your voice caused a pang of fear to shoot through Daniela, and she realised at that moment maybe she had went too far. Sure, you had punished her many a time before, but you had never sounded so serious and so menacing. You let go of her wrist and she immediately scrambled onto the floor, taking her place on her knees beside the bed and her hands landed on her thighs, palms facing upwards. “Close your eyes , do not move a muscle” you demanded once again, and she did exactly as told. The fact you weren’t using any pet names with her let her know how in the shit she was.
You walked over to Daniela’s closet, opening the door and kneeling down to reach the box found in the corner - the box that held all of her sex toys and gear. The fact that none of the other girls had found it or looked though it was a miracle. You reached in, pulling out a pretty red collar and leash, as well as a dildo and harness. Since she wanted fucked so badly, you’d give her it. You’d give her it but she wouldn’t get what she wanted. Walking back to the bed, her eyes still closed, you slipped your jeans off and attached the harness and dildo, it’s heavy length hanging off of your hipbones as you twisted the collar sound between your fingers.
“You have been particularly naughty today. I’m going to give you one singular chance to apologise” you said, voice now more casual, as if you were speaking about the weather rather than the actions of the little brat beneath you. “I- I’m sorry mommy, I just wanted your attention and…and…” Daniela stuttered, cheeks turning red as she tried to explain herself. “And what babygirl? You thought teasing me and taunting me all day would get you what- a nice reward?” You asked her, and her head shook timidly, seemingly unsure of her own actions and her reasons. “Well, I’ll give you something alright, I’m make sure that snarky bratty mouth of yours gets put to good use.” Silence once again overtook the room, and with her eyes still closed you connected the collar to her back, leash already attached. The action caused her to sharply exhale, and the redness in her cheeks to turn positively scarlet.
“Sit there like a good girl for once. No hands.” Every word you spoke was said with finality, like she couldn’t argue back - which in this sense she wouldn’t get the chance to. You tugged the leash forward slightly to take the slack out of it, trapping the rope around your fish as her head moved forward to where her mouth sat against the head of your strap on. Without word, you ground the toy forward with your hips, and it forced her mouth to open and accommodate the thick toy, to which she made a surprised sound, eyes bursting open to look at you as you stood over her. Your glare met her shining eyes as her lips wrapped around your strap, and you started to drag the toy in and out of her mouth; her eyes looked directly up into yours as she kept her head stationary and you began to fuck into her mouth. She knew how this worked: don’t move until you tug on the leash.
Sounds of gagging reverberated in the room as Daniela took the toy down her throat, her eyes rolling into the back of her head whilst your hopes surged forward. “So pretty when you aren’t talking” you groaned, tugging the leash whilst you pushed the toy further once again, her nose meeting your stomach as you bottomed out into her throat. She moaned around the toy in reply, her head now more freely moving from your leash tug as she Megan to aggressively give you head, spit collecting around the corners of her mouth and running down her chin.
You could have came jsut there watching the girl, but this wasn’t what it was about. It was about punishment, but you wanted to at least get the toy ready and enjoy Daniela’s pretty mouth around a toy for a little while before you got to work. “Get on the bed, hands and knees”you ordered, pulling the toy back out with a slight pop as you tugged Daniela’s collar once more. Not wanting to make anything worse for herself, Daniela sprung into action, climbing onto the bed just as you asked onto her hands and knees, you following closely behind as to not let go of her.
“So, you wanted to act out? You know what bad girls get don’t you?” You asked, voice dipped with honey as you stood behind her, strap pressing against her underwear covered ass. “A good fuck and an orgasm?” Daniela snarked, seemingly thinking that brattiness was going to get her somewhere, pressing her ass into you slightly. “Watch your fucking bratty mouth” you sneered, a hand landing on her ass with a resounding slap. “Count. Now.” The command didn’t leave any room for argument, and Daniela stuttered into obedience. “O-one” she stumbled out, her mouth having open in a silent groan “One what baby? You know better than that” you snarled, another light tug on her leash. The tug caused her to let out a moan, before replying “One Mommy, I’m sorry I- I-“ *slap* another spank rebounded off of her ass, the skin tainting bright red at the impact. “Fuck! Two mommy” she whimpered, her underwear quickly dampening in jest of the spanking. “That’s better, I want to hear you loud and clear babygirl”
Each slap crackled through the room, sounded with moans and whimpers as Daniela’s legs started to tremble. She was 8 spanks in, her throat was hoarse and her neck was red under her collar, sweat collecting down the column of her back. “Mommy I ca-I can’t tak- FUCK” she positively shrieked, your hand landing once more on the quickly bruising skin of her ass, a painting of red, blue and purple. “Yes you can, and you will. This is what you get for being a little fucking slut. You just couldn’t help yourself, could you?” your nasty comments may have seemed a little far, but deep down you know that Daniela loved being degraded by you like that, and if her underwear was any proof of this you could see that the fabric was absolutely soaked through, wetness starting to trail down her exposed thighs which she had clamped together.
“N-nine mommy. Please…” she begged, tears freely running down her face now, her voice cracking as she hiccupped and sobbed from the pain and the arousal. “Take your punishment. You earned it” you sneered, and instead of the last slap landing on her asscheek, your hips pulled backwards, hand instead landing once her clothes cunt in a wet slap. Daniela’s moan was downright sinful as her body shot forward, tugging on her leash as her head shot forward and curly hair covered her face. You could feel the heat there as you didn’t remove your hand, and the wetness you found sitting underneath that fabric was overwhelming. “Te-ten mommy! Please I can’t- I can’t take anymore mommy I’ve been good! I’ve been so good I took it so well!” She scrambled out, her voice sounded barely sober, sobs racking through her chest as your palm rested on her aching cunt. She was rambling at this point, head so fogged from pain and pleasure that you couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for her - you had been forceful with your punishment.
“You did pretty girl, but that doesn’t mean the punishment is over. You forgot about something, didn’t you?” The humorless chuckle that you let out punctuate the air as you moved your hand, pulling the Latina’s underwear to the side to slip the strap into her soaking wet hole. The sound that left Daniela’s throat sounded both like struggle and release, a low, dragging moan reaching your ears as you bottomed out inside her. “That’s it baby, take all of it like a good little bitch” you groaned at the sight, looking down as she swallowed the whole length of your strap inside her without resistance. She really had been that wet and ready from your earlier punishment.
You pulled on her leash roughly as your hand reached round to her stomach, tugging her up so her body was flush against you, your tank top covered breasts pressing into her moist back. Your face sank into the crook of her neck, and all you could smell was a mix of sweat, arousal and jasmine as you breathed in, mouth pressing against her pulse point as you felt the murmur of her moaning against them. “You know what to do babygirl, if you wanted fucked that badly, you can do it yourself” you smiled, and she immediately started grinding herself into you, her hips rutting backwards with a squeaked “thank you mommy” barely making it past her lips.
The girl was putting in a lot of effort, needy moans and whimpers leaving her mouth as she fucked herself into you, your hips completely stationary. Your left hand held the collar leash tightly, a reminder of who was in charge as your other hand reached up her chest, reaching one of her breasts which you grabbed roughly; Daniela let out a low groan at the feeling of you manhandling her as she chased pleasure. A chorus of “thank you mommy”’s were said as she ravenously rammed her hips backward into you. Not enough to take her anywhere, but she was trying her hardest. You knew she wouldn’t be able to finish unless you took control - it was your dominance that would finish her. “It feels so good mommy, please I’ve been so good for you” she cried out, your fingers pinching her nipple after a particularly hard thrust from her.
“Have you? I haven’t seen a good girl, I’ve seen a desperate slut pathetically grinding on me for release” You punctuated the sentence with another leash tug, and the girl moaned so loudly and pathetically that you could feel your own wetness staining your underwear. Oh how you loved this. “I’m sorry mommy, I- I’ll be the best, I’ll do anything please” the girl was begging with everything she had as she bounced on your strap, each thrust hitting her so deeply that her stomach might as well have been bulging from how deeply she was taking you.
You could tell the woman’s legs were getting tired, her whole body shaking slightly as she rode you with fervour, sobs breaking through. You decide she’s been good enough in this moment, she’s done her part to make it up to you. So, you pull your hips back, pulling the strap out of Daniela to the sound of an aggravated whine “mommy why- I’ve been so good!” The girl was close to cracking at this point, her face whipping round with tear stained gracing her cheeks and a pout on her face. “Get on top of me pretty girl, you’ve done enough” your voice was now sweeter, more caring but still with authority. “The leash stays. You love it anyways, don’t you baby?” Daniela nodded enthusiastically, and you crawled onto the bed, her clambering on top of you with her legs bracketing your hips. You sent the woman a smouldering smirk, eyes staring into eachother as you reached for the dildo, easing it back inside her slowly, her eyes rolling back into her head at the intrusion.
“That’s it good girl, you are so good for me” and with that, you started to fuck up into her, causing the bed to start trembling from the shifting of your hips upwards. Daniela’s mouth fell open, moans leaving her throat like a symphony as you took the reins, fucking her with reckless abandon. You knew this wouldn’t take too long, her wetness drooling down onto you as you rammed up inside of her “fuck mommy, feels so good” she groaned, hands shooting forward to claw at your stomach as her hips shot upward with every thrust. “Does mommy feel good inside you? You love when mommy fucks your pretty little pussy like this?” Daniela positively melted at the comment, a desperate whine shooting out of her as she arched her chest forward. Your pace was unrelenting, barely giving her a chance to catch up to her own pleasure as wet slaps sounded through the room. “Uh huh mommy, love it when- mmmph- when you fuck my pussy”
The girl had started to meet your thrusts with incessant grinding, chasing her pleasure like a freight train as you noticed the beginnings of Daniela’s tells that she was barrelling toward an orgasm. Her moans were beginning to sound entirely like begging, each whine and moan longing for a fast approaching release. You pulled her down toward you, leash pulled taught as her face was pulled to millilitres in front of yours. “Mommy I’m gonna cum, please can I cum I’m so so so close” she begged, her lips barely brushing yours as her hands reached up, nails digging into your chest in sweet pain. The girl was rutting against you, hips pushing into yours as pleading eyes bore into yours, pants ringing through your ears as you watched the most beautiful mess unfold in front of you.
“Are you going to be a good girl and say sorry for acting naughty?” You teased, hips stalling. The girl might as well have screamed at the sudden stop, her face making a grimace as you raised an eyebrow at the action. Quickly, she fixed her expression before she would get into trouble “I’m so so sorry mommy, I promise I won’t tease you like that again, I won’t be a brat anymore, I’ll be the best fucktoy for you and I’ll do whatever you ask mommy” she cried, looking at you with eyes that could sail a thousand ships, begging you to continue and to finally give her some sweet release. “That’s my girl, don’t be quiet. Cum like a good little slut” and with that, you slammed your hips back upwards, back into the unrelenting pace you had taken before.
Your hips hammered up into hers, her hips bouncing back as her orgasm started to build quickly again. “Thank you mommy, thank you” she repeated like a mantra, every bounce and every thrust working in perfect harmony to bring her to the edge “I’m your slut, mommy’s little slut” she moaned, face diving into your neck as she nipped and kissed at the exposed skin, barely cognisant as lust took her over. She was always like this close to an orgasm, barely aware of what she’d say on the edge. “Fuck tome mommy, please make me cum” “I’m your good little slut” “ruin me mommy” words flew out of her mouth without thought, you could tell she was on the edge because her hips were barely matching your rhythm now.
“Cum for me babygirl, cum like the little whore you are” you whispered in her ear, hot and sultry. That seemed to be all it took, and within seconds the girl was letting out an ear-splitting scream as you fucked up into her, you could feel the tightness as her walls contracted against the toy and her nails broke the skin of your chest. Daniela’s vision had all but turned white at the feeling, the orgasm so strong it felt like it was being ripped out of her body. The scream dissolved into sobs as she rode out the waves, her mouth latching onto your neck with a bite as her body convulsed over yours, your free hand holding her hips to grind her onto you.
“That’s it baby, that’s my good girl” you cooed as she came down from the high, her hips stilling as you continued thrusts, slowing down to let her enjoy the aftershocks her moans travelling through your neck as she soothed the bite mark lazily. Her body collapsed on top of you from exhaustion, and you couldn’t help the soaring feeling of having the girl tired and fucked out, lying in your arms, leash forgotten as you let go of it and wrapped your arms around the girl, unwilling to move until she was ready to do so.
“So, are you gonna act up like that again Avanzini?”
“Probably, give it a couple of weeks” Dani mumbled into your skin, kissing the new bite mark lazily.
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sashi-ya · 1 year ago
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A WHITE RELIEF hoshina soshiro x f! subordinate & wife reader. lactation kink
⋆ requested by anonymous: SASHIII!! hoshina w a lactation kink for his fem!subordinate reader!!! ⋆ mdni. explicit smut. lactation kink. pregnancy and baby mentioned (duh). vag sex. ⋆ wc: 1.2k // event masterlist
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You came back too fast; that’s what Soshiro said. After carrying a new creature inside of your womb, and taking care of them for enough time, it was time to come back to the Japanese Anti Kaiju Defence Force… and not even him, your superior, could stop you from doing so.
“I told you not to come back that early, how’s (baby name)?” Soshiro scolds you, once again, and for the tenth time today since you woke up.
“(Baby name) is fine, don’t be silly. I needed to come back to keep them safe. Plus… I missed you” you purr, hand sliding up his neck, fixing the collar of his jacket.
You are vice-captain Hoshina’s weakness; a single touch and he feels his legs fainting. A single touch and he swears is not that early to have a new baby.
“Don’t- don’t play your dirty tricks on me, (Name)… I’m not gonna fall for that sweet touch of yours…” he jokes, planting a kiss on your forehead as he walks away still a little troubled with your decision. Now, he really understands General Shinomiya; having his lover on the line and being away from a new piece of himself felt… painful, to say the least, stressful.
You giggled, tying your hair up, ready for a so needed training day back with your nakama… however, calm and peace wouldn’t last forever as very soon the Kaiju alert reverberated all around Tachikawa base.
An intense operation took place near Tokyo, it even required Captain Mina to fire his cannon to blow a giant daikaiju dead. And, as intense, it turned out to be long and tiring…
You ruffle your hair and brush your suit; dust from debris and rubble fell on you but it doesn’t really bother you. However, the thing that is annoying you the most is probably how tense and swollen your chest begins to feel. You really didn’t feel it during the fight, yet, as the time passed, your breasts were full and packed of milk that should had been pumped before.
“You good? Any injuries?” Soshiro comes your way, asking you for the third time in 10 minutes.
“I’m good. You, however, don’t look good at all” you mutter, cleaning a little trail of blood from the commissure of his lips. “Could you be a little bit more careful, dear husband?”
He nods; he is aware he should be a little bit more careful now that he is in charge of caring for you and your new little bundle of joy.
Both walk back one of the vans, tired, exhausted. And, you, in particular, uncomfortable, swollen. You really don’t wanna show him you are feeling this way; that would only prove him right in some way. Having the little time to pump your milk out, this wouldn’t have happened...
“What is it? What is hurting?” he asks, bending forward as he sits on the back of the van.
You look away from him; how is he able to tell? You haven’t shown a single hint of your discomfort… guess soulmates just know.
“Nothing is hurting; I’m just a little bit uncomfortable… I haven’t had the time to use my pump” you confess, it’d be stupid to lie.
Soshiro takes his hands to his face; massaging his temples he sighs.
Before he could say “I told you so” you stop him with a bunch of reasons why it is worth it to come back despite this “little non important things”
But vice-captain Hoshina, far from scolding you, took the time to think of a better outcome of the situation. And, instead of making a big fuss about it, he simply stood up, closed the van’s back doors and stood right before you.
“What-?” you ask, confused. “Open; I will help you” he words, sounding more like an order than a simple request.
“What are you-?”
“Open”
You do as he says, lowering down the zipper of your anti kaiju -pretty worn out- suit. Immediately after, the pressure of your bloated breasts protruded out of the suit.
Soshiro, gloating at the view, takes a very deep breath; he needs to stop himself from pouncing on your chest and instead be able to grab them with utmost delicacy.
He does, feeling them heavier than his hands remembered from this morning.
“God, how long has it been?” he asks, massaging ever so softly on the sides of both of your breasts.
He comes closer, placing a sweet kiss on top of each one. His fingers sliding down each of your nipples. Like little clamps, index and thumb press on them, allowing some drops to pop from each one.
You flinch just a little; too swollen to use his fingers, it feels like nothing will be able to make the milk flow.
Nothing but his lips…
“May I?” he whispers, already hard and desperate to taste the subtle sugary flavour of your white delight.
Your cheeks on fire, your eyes shut down. Your lips pursed, biting the inside of your mouth… “Do it…” you mourn.
“Heh…” he smirks, eyes this time opened, fixed on yours. Soshiro uses the tip of his tongue to flicker the hardened surface of one of your nipples.
You tremble to his touch; it’s been long enough since he did this. What before it was only exclusive to his kid, to innocence and pure love and nurturing, is now his… this time in such a different, lewd, addictive demeanour.
His lips surround the swollen protrusion, sucking after with perfect technique; it is not painful. It is absolutely delicious.
And delicious is also the elixir that starts filling his mouth. Pristine, like infused in honey, pooling into his tongue.
To much at once, it finally flows and alleviates the pressure. And it overflows your lover’s mouth, dripping down the commissures of his mouth. What once had traces of dried blood from the battle, now has been washed by nurturing liquid.
Oh, and the pressure has now travelled down your body, until your core. But specially his. The suit is killing him, stroking his erection like a jail built by Izumo tecs.
You notice his trapped bulge, and you act in consequence. As your hand strokes his purple hair back, the free one let the zipper of his suit fall down his lean body.
“Than-f-k youf-“ he utters, in between sucking and swallowing.
“Fuck me while you drink from it, would you?” you ask, completely desperate as him. You had forgotten for some months what his lips on your nipples felt like.
Soshiro felt there was no need to ask for such thing, as he sat back on the seats to receive you on his lap.
You let your suit off, unlocking it fully from your body. Still tangled on one of your ankles, you don’t mind and immediately hop on him.
His dick; oozing desperate transparency, lays proud and ready to bury inside you.
No time should be wasted, and in a matter of seconds you let your body flop on him, allowing deep penetration that makes it difficult to keep quiet. Your breasts bounce as you start humping on him, this time dripping white that Soshiro easily traps with his mouth. A mess of sweat, milk and desire spills everywhere. Cumming hard as he keeps deliciously sucking everything out of you, while you milk him in your own way… maybe it wasn’t that early to try for another baby, right?
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777heavengirl · 9 months ago
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the one with Pobol y cwm
sirius black x reader ! - 1,091 words masterlist bags masterlist A/N: HAPPY BDAY SIRIUS BLACK MY BELOVED- SURPRISE UPDATE IN HONOR OF HIM TODAY- oh dear pls dont look at this too in detail i am very sick and exhausted but i wanted to put something out for his bday...
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Sirius had never been a crier. Yet as his nimble fingers dug into the soft material of your sweater, and his body shook with sobs— it became clear to you that he had just been holding it in. 
He hadn’t said much after he walked through his door, red-eyed and ready to crumble. 
But you knew. 
You had always been this way. Just knowing, him. Knowing somehow, what he was thinking, what he was feeling. You could tell, most of the time anyway.
You knew he felt sorry, and you knew he felt frustratingly heartbroken. Angry and furious, but deeply blue. The little boy inside of him had lost his mother, and there was nothing he could say to himself that would make it better. 
 Because through all her faults, her disgusting vile words, and even worse behavior. Through her hexes and unforgivable curses, through every bit of torture that Walburga had subjected Sirius through, it was still his mother.
She would always be his mother.
Disowned or not, abuser or not, the owner of his nightmares, the person he hated most. Nothing could ever erase the fact that for at least the first sixteen years of his life, she had been his mother, and in a way, in a deeply hurtful, and grief-ridden way, she would always be. 
So he cried. For the mother he had until age ten, for the mother he had been subjected to until sixteen, for the mother he never had in the first place. 
It didn’t matter how many times Sirius told himself to not cry over her, it didn’t matter that he truly hated her. It didn’t matter he once had half a mind to kill her himself. He realized that he’d never get the good relationship he had always secretly wanted. As long as she was alive, even though Sirius would rather die himself than admit it, the stupidest goddamn part of him was still holding on to that chance. 
He had never realized he was still clutching onto that.
Until the chance got ripped away.
So you sat, with his face buried in your stomach as he kneeled in front of his bed, in front of you. Sobbing. His arms around your torso and clutching at the material of your jumper with white-hot fists. 
You didn't know what else to do besides hug him back, trying not to cry. Your hands pet his hair, strong and steady, because you knew that was what he needed the most right now. 
Your reliability, your care, your unconditional love for him. 
And you did, love him that is. 
From the bottom of your heart, you loved Sirius Orion Black.
Even if you hadn’t talked in weeks, even if you felt like a ghost in the house, even if you had been planning your move out no less than thirty minutes ago in a fit of anxious desperation.
“I’m sorry Sirius” you didn’t think he heard you over his earth-shattering sobs, but he shook his head slightly, almost as if wanting to say no, don’t be. “I am sorry, I know she was horrid-”
���I hate her-” his words were hoarse and raw, he didn’t look up. “I still hate her, I need her to wake up so I can tell her- god I can’t tell her-” You could feel his words reverberating through his throat, 
“I hate her so much, I hoped she’d die in some- in some disgusting gruesome death, I just-” he took a deep breath, his breath ragged and shaky “I hoped it would be something ironic and karmic like getting hit by a muggle bus but that goddamn bitch had the audacity to go in peace- in her sleep no less merlin- I- I- just keep hoping that I’m dreaming and that she’s… there and rotting alive in that awful house” 
“I’m sorry-”
His voice was calmer now, still buried in your sweater, still embracing you. “I hate her and I am glad she’s dead, she doesn’t deserve to be alive and well after everything she put me and my brother through- but the stupidest part of me- is still mourning”
He loosened his hold on you, and he slumped between your legs, his face now only half-buried in your torso. You could see the red splotches that had bloomed on his porcelain skin.
“I don't know what I feel any more love, I feel out of control”
“I know”
“I’m sorry I’ve been avoiding you”
“I’m sorry too-”
“Please don’t leave me… don’t leave me alone”
“I don’t think I could leave even if I wanted to Sirius- not that I do… don’t worry-” Your fingers carded through his hair “I will always be here”
“I’m sorry-”
“You don’t have to apologize- we can talk about that later… do you want to go for a walk?”
He lifted his head up slightly, enough to steal glances of your face as he wiped his face with his fingers. 
“Can we just watch Pobol y cwm-” his voice was low and gloomy, it broke your heart.
“Yeah, we can watch Pobol…” You tried smiling at him, it was a sad one, but he mirrored it nonetheless. It was hard not to get emotional while seeing him this way. 
Shattered and somber. 
Irrevocably burdened with the knowledge that while yes he mourned his mother, just some idolized version of her he buried deep within the confines of his mind— he would never get justice either. 
Sirius Black was relieved, he realized, as he laid his head on your shoulder and watched the advertisements on TV. His abuser was dead, it was more than he could ask for. Yes, he’d have to talk to you eventually, tell you how he feels, even simply explain why he got so upset. He’d have to write to his brother and not repeat the cycle of anger that was embedded deep within their veins. He’d eventually have to face his father. He’d have to face the fact that he, did indeed, have grief over the death of Walburga. 
But all of that could wait for tonight, he had you right now. 
With your arm around him, tucking his much larger form into your side, with his legs over your thighs and Pobol y cwm playing in the back. The soft of your sweater, and the sweet soft scent of your hair, the warmth from your hand drawing circles on his back. It was all that mattered right now.
It was just you and Pobol y cwm.
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taglist ; @thatlittlered @giuli-in-earth
let me know if you wanna be added ! or if i missed you
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padmesweetheart · 4 months ago
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She Takes Care of Everyone
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Pairing: Hayden Christensen x Non-Famous Nurse!Young Wife!Reader
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Soft!Hayden, Hurt/Comfort, Real-Life Feels
Word Count: ~2,700
Harold the donkey mention
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You didn’t even remember how you made it to the front door.
The last 12 hours had blurred into one long, aching stretch of beeping monitors, hushed conversations, the click of your clogs against cold hospital floors, and too many coffee cups to count. It wasn’t even your first 12-hour shift that week. It was your fourth. And your body felt like it had been wrung out, soul and all.
The sky was already dark when you stepped up to the porch, still in your scrubs, badge clipped to your collar, hair messy in the ponytail you’d tied up at 5 a.m. Your car keys clinked softly in your hand as you opened the door and stepped inside, dropping your bag with a dull thud by the entryway.
You barely managed a quiet, exhausted “Hi…” before you slipped off your shoes and leaned your weight against the wall, letting out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding.
“Baby?”
Hayden’s voice came from the living room—soft, a little raspy, like he hadn’t spoken in a while. A second later, he was there, walking quickly toward you, barefoot and warm-eyed and already reaching for you like instinct.
You melted into his arms the second they wrapped around you.
“Hi,” you whispered into his chest. “I’m dead.”
He kissed the top of your head, arms tightening around your tired frame. “I can see that. You smell like work and sadness.”
You huffed a laugh against his shirt, too tired to even be embarrassed. “I didn’t sit down once today.”
“Come on,” he murmured. “Let’s get you out of these clothes.”
“Wow,” you teased weakly as he guided you down the hallway. “Didn’t realize I married a man who preys on the weak.”
“I meant into your pajamas, you menace.”
Ten minutes later, you were wrapped in the softest oversized tee (one of his, obviously), your legs bare and clean, hair out of its ponytail and finally able to breathe. You stood in the kitchen half-asleep, watching Hayden fuss around like you were the most fragile thing on earth.
He moved with quiet determination: setting up a glass of water next to a mug of herbal tea, grabbing your favorite blanket off the back of the couch, and pulling a heating pad from the drawer just in case your back was aching—which it was, thank you very much.
“You don’t have to—”
He shot you a soft look. “I want to.”
Your heart fluttered, tired or not.
Once he had everything just right, he settled you onto the couch with the heating pad on low and the blanket tucked all around you like you were a burrito. Then he turned on that comfort show you always watched when your brain was too fried to function—no questions asked.
He sat beside you, one arm behind your shoulders, the other resting over your blanket-wrapped thighs, rubbing soft circles into your leg.
For a few minutes, neither of you spoke. You just leaned into his side, letting your body decompress for the first time all day. The tea was warm in your hands, and Hayden’s presence—solid, quiet, grounding—was the only thing keeping you from falling apart at the seams.
“You’ve been working all week,” he said eventually, voice low. “Twelve-hour shifts every day?”
You nodded into his shoulder. “Short-staffed. A couple nurses out sick. We didn’t want to turn away post-op cases, so… yeah. It’s been a lot.”
He kissed your temple. “You’re unbelievable. You know that?”
You shrugged gently. “It’s just part of the job.”
He pulled back just enough to look you in the eye. “No. It’s more than that. You take care of everyone. Even when you’ve got nothing left. Even when you come home looking like a ghost.”
You smiled softly, blinking away the stinging behind your eyes. “I do it because I care.”
He reached up and cradled your cheek in his palm. “I know. That’s why I care so damn much about you.”
His thumb brushed just under your eye, catching the tear that had snuck out without your permission.
You leaned into his hand, eyes fluttering closed. “I’m just so tired, Hayd.”
“I know, baby,” he murmured. “You don’t have to be strong here. You get to fall apart with me.”
That did it. You didn’t sob, not really—but the weight of the week, the exhaustion, the stress of having so many people relying on you… it all let go. A few quiet tears, a soft sniffle, and then silence again. His hand never left your cheek. His body never stopped holding yours.
He didn’t fill the silence. He just let it be. And that—that meant everything.
When your breathing evened out and the worst had passed, he kissed your forehead again and whispered, “Stay right here. I’m making you grilled cheese.”
Your eyes cracked open. “Grilled cheese?”
He smiled. “With tomato soup. And I’m cutting it diagonally, because you’re fancy.”
You giggled through your nose. “God, I love you.”
“I know.” He stood, stretching his back a little. “I’m the man of the house, remember?”
“I thought Harold the donkey was the man of the house.”
Hayden threw you a dramatic glare over his shoulder. “That ass has been trying to usurp me since day one.”
The soup and sandwich combo was perfect.
He brought it to you on a tray like you were royalty, then sat beside you and made sure you actually ate every bite, even when you were tempted to crash between mouthfuls.
Once the food was gone and the show was still playing quietly in the background, he curled you into his chest again, tucking your legs across his lap.
“You’re gonna sleep for like fifteen hours, huh?” he murmured into your hair.
“Minimum.”
“I’ll feed the animals. Harold and I will put our differences aside for the greater good.”
You smiled into his shirt. “You always take such good care of me.”
His voice was low and soft, like a promise. “You take care of everyone. Someone has to take care of you.”
And with that—warm, safe, fed, and finally home—you let yourself fall asleep in the arms of the man who loved you hardest when you had nothing left to give.
And that, really, was everything.
———————————————————————————————
Tag list:
@skyguytoast @dessxoxsworld
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pursuitseternal · 1 year ago
Note
Can i get prompt 20 with astarion x f!tav? Maybe she is in her fertile period and very horny or maybe carrying his child and hormones are messing up with her head (idk if u feel comfortable writing about it, i didn't find your rules. If you don't, ok) and Astarion offers his thigh for her to get off :))
“Helpful…”
UA Astarion x f!Reader | Smut Ask Prompts
CW: pregnancy smut
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Thirty-six weeks… it’s been. Not that you’re counting. Each day is more taxing than the last… a blissful sort of torture, one you endure with a smile.
Most days.
But, days like today, you question your sanity and doubt your strength.
You couldn’t even count the sum of enemies you slaughtered. You brought down the Chosens of the Dead Three, you massacred an Illithid army….
And now the rapid flutter and kicking in your rounded belly is enough to lay you up for hours. The ache and stretch it is to bring a life into this world takes your literal breath away. Of course it doesn’t help that the child inside is Dhampir… and that its father is equally demanding at times, in different ways.
As you’ve grown heavier, rounder, Astarion has grown more attentive, helping around your cottage in the Underdark. Honestly, you sometimes scratch your head to watch the once selfish, snarky bastard of a Spawn become a snarky, helpful bastard of a Spawn.
There is one way he has relished helping you; the more demand the child inside you places on your body, the more demand your body has on you for… release. Sometimes it makes you cry, how madly you want Astarion to fuck you. Doesn’t matter where or when or for how long.
With that little problem, he’s more than eager to help. The further into your term you get, the worse the ache is, but the more exhausted you are too. Often some days, you just swallow the rage of lust that simmers inside you, but other days, he notices far too easily.
His nostrils flare as you enter your little study. He reclines on the little couch near the fire, the dim light dancing off the brightly colored spines of books around you. Scenting your need, he opens his arms, a familiar invitation to rest against him. You take the last few waddling steps, hands on your knees as you lower your rear to the couch. Your body fills the space between his legs, grimacing as it creaks under you.
Your cheeks are flush with need, and now they burn with embarrassment. “Gods I feel huge,” you bemoan, trying not to make the wooden frame of the couch groan under you again as you shift closer to your Vampiric love. “I can’t wait much longer, love,” you groan, leaning back against the cool hard planes of his torso.
“A few more weeks, and then our little one will be here,” he whispers into your ear, lips pressing a kiss, fingers pulling the stray wisps of hair back over your shoulder. “I’m sure she will be as fierce as you…”
“That’s your guess? She?” You give an airy laugh. “Well, she certainly is already fierce, given the amount of kicking, punching, and spinning that plagues me at all hours.”
A cool hand wanders over the taut curve of your belly, and instantly the child thumps against the pressure. You cry out at the pain, laughing at the look of surprise on Astarion’s face as your belly shifts with the babe’s movement within. “Incredible,” he breathes before looking at you, tilting your face into his by clasping your chin. “You’re… incredible,” lips murmur against yours. “Nearly impossible odds against us to create a dhampir, and here you are heavy with my child. Wouldn’t be the first time we were victorious against the impossible, hmm?”
“Knowing you, it won’t be the last, either,” you laugh, pursing your lips to kiss him slowly, sweetly. Hands work their way lower to the base of your belly, rucking up your skin to hunt down that source of your scent, that center of your searing need. Cool fingers on your skin give you instant relief, climbing their caress higher and higher until the dip inside you. Your aching spine bends even more, tilting your heavy hips to let him explore deeper.
Heavenly, his chilled thumb dances over your constantly hardened clit, his fingers cooling the ever-burning walls of your cunt. You hiss, riding his fingers. But your body is too laden to move like this. Your hips lock up, your back crying out in pain from your position.
And Astarion reads it in the smallest twinge of your face. Crimson eyes widen in concern, and he shushes you, soothing you as you are lifted up in his strong arms. “Ride me,” he purrs. But your hip joints already protest at the idea of being spread for his waist.
A pitiful whimper escapes you as you manage to pull yourself up on your knees on the couch to face him. Those silver brows furrow, hands at your waist to steady you… both of you. His sight roams over your flushed complexion and sweaty brow, and he guides you over his one long leg, propping it up to press beneath you.
“Use my thigh, my darling,” he murmurs, “your saviour is here.” He grins, raskish and conceited. That same line from when he once would reach out to you in combat. But you’re too pent up to tease, burning too hot with a need to find release with him in any capacity.
A hiss escapes your lips as you settle your folds on the bone of his thigh. Hard, corded muscle cools your wet and aching cunt as you grind. Slick soaks instantly through your panties and definitely into the fabric of his pants. But it only makes his hands grip harder into your hips. The fabric of your loose, flowing dress is no match for the iron clutch of his dexterous fingers.
“Fuck,” you curse, bracing your hands on either side of his head as you move faster. That new angle rubs your clit perfectly, the pressure of his thigh beneath you makes your mouth water with the promise of relief.
“Tch, language, darling,” he chides, slipping a hand beneath your skirts to find your clit with deadly precision, even blindly. “Do you want our babe to be born swearing like Karlach?”
You hang your head, laughing breathlessly until your ribs hurt. You didn’t know they could do that. A bite of your lip, and you grind faster, harder, savoring the way your soaked clothes rub over the aching nerves of your folds. Delicious friction that soothes the ache inside you.
And his finger, gods, it coaxes sighs from your lips, circles made to tease your nub from its swollen hood until you’re shaking.
“Come for me, my love…” he rasps as you hang your head closer to his honeyed lips. Words whispered to you a thousand times before seem to penetrate you deep in your belly, the fluttering of your child making you catch your breath. It grips your whole stomach, your climax. The whole swell of your belly tightens, and then tightens some more. Legs shake, and your whole body floods with the burst of pleasure you craved all day. Little strangled noises fall from your lips, until panting, you rest, unable to move off his leg.
“Where would you be without me, darling?” he purrs, slipping his hand deeper between your thighs, stroking and stretching your walls. Feeling them flutter on his fingers.
You huff a humored, tired laugh, “Not pregnant, for one.” He pouts back at you. “And two, I’d be lost without you my love.” You lean forward for a kiss, letting him hold you up. Letting him support you in all the ways he can.
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fandom-imagines-stories · 6 months ago
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Tell Me a Lie
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Matt Murdock x Reader
Words: 4617
Summary: Months of hell lead you to one moment- finding out your boyfriend is really alive. After figuring out where he’s been hiding, you concoct a plan- a very stupid, very dangerous plan- to draw him out. 
Notes: This is a terrible summary, but whatever. I finally started season three and I thought putting the reader in this situation would be really interesting. Obviously, his relationship with Elektra wasn’t the same, but the whole self-destructive Matthew is here and ready for angst. I’m imagining this kinda between the episodes where Matt goes to the hotel and the prison, but doesn’t really follow the plot of the episodes, just my own. This is also just a mess, but oh well. (And I know this is kind of what Bella does in New Moon, but I kind of dig it so I won’t apologize haha)
Warnings: Attempted assault, violence, abandonment, alcoholism literally looking for danger (obviously, spoilers for season three)
More Matt Imagines: HERE
-
It didn’t smell like him anymore. Such a weird, stupid complaint, but it made you sick to your stomach to breathe in the musty air of the apartment. 
You sat up, nursing your head in your hand, still pounding from the night before. Not that you’d slept, but hangovers still found a way to bite you in the ass. It was getting pathetic. Not that you cared. And not that your friends had actually used that word. 
‘Concerning’ was Foggy’s favorite. 
He could have his concern. 
You chased the numb. 
Anything was better than remembering he wasn’t here and the apartment you’d just started to share didn’t smell like him anymore. 
You got out of bed on shaking limbs, feeling the nausea roll over you. You swayed, wondering if you’d throw up again. You didn’t. 
You went to the kitchen and made a pot of coffee to pull you out of the haze. Karen and Foggy were coming by today to talk about rent. You had to seem at least somewhat put together or they would try and talk you into getting help. Getting help meant moving on. Moving on meant giving up. Giving up meant lying to yourself. Admitting that he was dead and he wasn’t coming back. 
But Matt Murdock wasn’t dead. 
You could feel it. 
The pounding at the door felt like knocking on your skull. You groaned. 
Foggy stepped inside. 
“Morning,” he greeted with his usual chipper smile. 
You didn’t understand it. How he could still seem so happy after everything that happened. Then again, things went rather well for him after…
You shook the thoughts from your head. This wasn’t Foggy’s fault. 
“Hey,” you croaked. You took a long, burning drink from your caffeinated cup and let its effects wash over you. “I thought you two were coming together?” 
“Karen had… other stuff.” Foggy peaked around the corner, plastering a smile across his face. He figured he’d ease into the news. Especially because you looked- well- you looked the way you usually did these past few weeks. “But she says hi.” 
You nodded and took another drink. “Coffee?” 
“I already had some, thanks.” 
He stood silently. 
You stood silently. You raised a brow. “You can sit down, Foggy.” 
“Right. Thanks.” He nodded awkwardly and took a seat on the couch. So much for playing it cool. 
You set your mug to the side and leaned on the counter, fingers gripping the edge like a lifeline. 
“What happened, Foggy?” You stared at the back of his head and felt that familiar squeezing, wrenching breathlessness in your chest. The same feeling when Claire dragged you out of Midland Circle. The same feeling when you watched the building fall. The same feeling when Matt didn’t walk out. “Is it… is it Matt? Did they find him?” 
“No, it’s not about-” He blew out a sigh. “God, you haven’t seen the news then?” 
You hurried around to stand in front of him, panic still evident in your exhausted eyes.
Foggy had to look away. 
“Why, what’s on the news?” 
He gulped. “Maybe you should sit down.” 
“Just tell me what happened,” you scoffed. The sound came out as a nervous laugh, but on the inside, you were screaming. 
His blue eyes met yours. 
“Wilson Fisk made a deal with the feds. He’s out of prison.” 
You blinked. The crushing in your chest was replaced by your heart stopping. 
“What?” You choked out. Of all the things you were expected to hear, Fisk’s name wasn’t one of them. 
“Well, not out exactly. He’s apparently giving them information that’s made him a target in his old prison so they’re keeping him in a cushy penthouse for ‘safety purposes.’” He spat each word out. 
You put a hand on the back of the chair for support. “Fisk is free?” 
“Like I said, he isn’t free, but-”
You held up a hand to stop him.“Where’s this hotel?” 
-
The courtyard was absolute mayhem. Reporters scurried in every direction, each harassing a different agent for information they wouldn’t get. Matt dodged in between them. The noise made his still recovering head pound, but he could still pick out enough to get through. He ducked his head when he heard Karen’s voice, a small moment of panic almost making him turn around. 
He kept moving. 
The crowds didn’t surprise you. And neither did seeing the familiar blonde head weaving through the groups with determined strides. You hurried after her, almost bumping into the man in front of you, but he stepped out of the way just in time. 
“Karen!” You called. 
Gold strands whipped around. Her clear blue stare cut through the crowd. 
“Y/N?” She said, pushing through to you. “What the hell are you doing here?” 
“So it’s true.” You tilted your head to the top of the building, its windows reflecting the sun in blinding brightness. “Wilson Fisk is up there?” 
She sighed. “Foggy told you then?” 
“If you’re planning on an ‘it isn’t safe for you to be here��� speech, save it,” you snapped. “I could tell you the same thing.” 
She bit her cheek, looked you over, and determined you looked sober enough. “Alright, follow me.” 
Matt couldn’t move. He tried to force his feet forward, but the heavy beating of his heart filled his ears and made it impossible to navigate the space around him. 
Your voice. Your scent. Even your heartbeat stood out amongst the dozens of people there. And for a moment, just a moment, he wanted to turn around. 
“Promise me we’ll go on that trip we talked about, yeah?” You laughed, though the air was salty with your tears and your voice shook. He kissed your lips for the last time.
“I promise.” 
But that wasn’t what haunted Matt for the last few months. Your sweet words of promise and hope stung, but they weren’t what kept him from going to you. Your screams were. 
“Let me go! Matt! No! Matty! I won’t leave him! Matt!” Even with countless floors between, Matt could hear your gut-wrenching screams as the others dragged you out of the building just before it blew. “Matt! Please! Matt!”
“Matt?” 
It took him a moment to realize that your voice now wasn’t from his memory. It was now.
You’d seen him. But judging by the direction, there was a chance you hadn’t seen his face. He could ignore you and chances were, you’d think you were crazy. Just another offense he’d committed against you. 
He wanted to turn around, to hold you and kiss your lips again and tell you he was okay and everything was going to be okay. That he was still your Matt. 
But the man you fell in love with was gone. He was buried under Midland Circle. 
Matt kept walking. 
-
You’d seen him. As crazy as it was, you knew it was him. He’d heard you. He must have because he stopped- just for a second, but he stopped. Karen may not have believed you, though you could tell she wanted to, but it didn’t matter. 
It was Matt. 
Somehow, it didn’t make any sense but it all made sense at the same time. He was going after Fisk. Of course, he was. Not even the grave couldn't stop your Matt from protecting his city. From protecting you. 
What you didn’t understand is why he kept walking. He acted like you weren’t there, but he of all people couldn’t have simply not noticed you. He’d left you there on purpose. 
He’d left you.
You paced the apartment with your hands raking through your hair with one question on your mind. 
Why? 
Sure, Matt would always use the excuse of protecting you before, but this time felt different. Had you done something? Had you not done enough at Midland Circle? What happened to him? 
Was it your fault?
The explosion was your idea and it buried him. Did he blame you as much as you blamed yourself?
Your feet halted in front of the closet door. Behind the door was a box. Inside the box was the emptiness that haunted your every waking moment for the past you didn’t even know how many days anymore. Your fingers clutched at the neck of the bottle on the table. The drink burned. 
None of it mattered. ‘Why’ didn’t matter. What mattered was that he was out there and he left you and as the burn raced down your throat you knew what you needed to do. 
And you knew where he might be.
-
The gentleness of your touch eased the sting of the disinfectant as you dabbed it on his wounds. It wasn’t the first night he’d come back cut and beaten, but you didn’t let your worry deter your movements. He came back. That’s what mattered. 
“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked, your voice as soft as your motions. You touched a particularly sore spot and he winced. As you went to draw your hand away, he caught it in his, fingers grasping at yours, still clenched around the towel. 
“Can we just… sit for a while?” He breathed. 
You nodded. He wiped away any blood remaining on his skin and set the towel aside. His arms wrapped around you as he pulled you to his chest. He listened to your heartbeat. You listened to his. 
Matt remembered the woman he’d come across earlier that night. Two men had jumped her. They were going to take what they wanted and leave her for dead. He’d taken his time beating them senseless while she got away. But her screams still echoed through his head. 
He tensed beneath you and you looked up at him through your lashes. 
“What is it?” 
“Nothing.”
You sat up. “Matt.” 
“It’s nothing,” he managed a laugh. “Really. Just come here.” He coaxed you back to him, but the tension was still there. He breathed in your presence and let out a low sigh. His arms tightened around you. “I’d never let anything happen to you.” His tone was different. Almost afraid. 
You drew lines on his chest. “I know.” 
“And I’d never hurt you, or at least mean to, anyway, but I know that I have and I’m-”
“Matty.” You crawled up so you were beside him, taking his face in your hands. “All I ask is that you come home at the end of the night.” You kissed his cheek. “In one piece, preferably.” He chuckled and you pressed your lips to his. You whispered in between kisses. “Just come home.” 
-
He talked about this place sometimes. Not often. Getting Matt to open up about his childhood was like pulling teeth, but in those last few months together, he’d started to trust you enough to let you in. 
This felt like a betrayal of that. Using your knowledge to expose him. To confront him for leaving you behind. A sober you might have thought of that. But the whiskey-fueled your anger, the rum your despair, and everything else blocked out any logical thought. 
What was the word Foggy used? 
Right. 
Concerning.
“Alright, Matthew,” you called out. Your voice was barely more than a hoarse whisper as you tried to hold back sobs. The wind stung the streaks of tears on your cheeks, but the more you tried to wipe them away, the more they fell. You took a drink. “This is it. Now or never.” 
You waited. You gave him a chance to stop you. 
“You always said you would never let anything happen to me, right? That you’d never hurt me.” You held your arms out at your sides. “Well, here we are, you goddamn liar!” Your voice echoed through the street. He would have been able to hear you for blocks, but standing just outside his damn door had to be good enough. “Come out, Matt!”
“Dude, check out this crazy bitch,” a voice said from behind you. 
Your stomach flipped. You swallowed the nervous bile in your throat. This was part of the plan. Sure, you thought you’d have to do a little more seeking, but this worked even better. There was only one way your tangled-up mind could figure that would get Daredevil to come out to play. You just hoped he would bring your Matt with him. 
You turned around. Two men stood in front of you, both of them with eyes scanning your body and lips forming smirks. Oh yeah. They were perfect. 
“What did you just say to me?” You tried to make your voice sound more confident than you actually felt. You wanted their anger, not their pity. 
“Hey, no need to be like that, I was just kidding,” the taller one said, holding his hands up in mock innocence. “I was just about to tell my buddy that you look a little lost.”
“Yeah, maybe she could use our help,” his friend agreed. “Do you want our help?” From the sound of his tone ‘help’ was the last thing he was offering. 
They both stepped towards you. 
And then a thought broke through your intoxicated, reckless mind. 
What if Matt really was dead?
It made you freeze. It almost made you sober. 
What if you just saw some guy that looked like him? What if you’d imagined it all together? What if all this time you’d been hoping- hell, even praying- that he would come back and he was still down there, at the bottom of Midland Circle, crushed and bloody and… gone? 
The men took another step forward, looking equally confused as they were intrigued. 
What if there was no one around to save you?
You held your head high. 
You hoped they’d kill you.
Either way, at least you would know. 
“You alright there, sweetheart?” The tall one asked. Sweetheart. The word stung. It belonged to someone else. 
You didn’t say anything and just started swinging. Fist to teeth, then foot against knee, you actually managed to do some damage before the friend grabbed your arms from behind. You stomped on his foot as hard as you could. Just because this was part of your plan didn’t mean you were going to make it easy for them. It had to at least look like you tried. For Foggy and Karen. 
The thought of the two of them threw you off. It made you blink, which allowed the lead prick to get a hold of your hair and use it to throw you to the ground. 
“You wanna play it that way, fine,” he growled. 
“Hair pulling?” You sneered up at him. “What, did your little sister teach you that move?” 
“Mouthy little bitch.” He brought his heel down on your head. Hard. It probably should have knocked you out, but you could still see through blurred vision with darkness around the edges. They started to walk away. 
“W-wait,” you said. The feet at the edge of your vision stopped. “Wait, come here.” You beckoned him to you with your hand. He crouched down. “Is that all you’ve got, pussy?” 
The hit came faster than you prepared for, knocking the breath out of your lungs. He kicked. And kicked. And kicked. Blood filled your mouth. You thought you heard a knife click open, but then everything went silent. 
And there was only one pair of feet.
A grunt. A thud. A body hitting the pavement. 
“What the…” Your main assailant gasped.  
You blinked, trying to see what was going on.
“Hey, man, she started it, I swear.” Another grunt. Another thud. Another body hit the pavement. 
A masked face appeared over yours.  
You smiled through the pain. “I knew it.” 
He took off the black band, revealing his panicked face. It was the last thing you saw before the darkness in your head took over. 
-
Matt carried you downstairs, every sense tuned into the creaking of your broken ribs, the smell of the blood leaking from your lips, your head, your nose. He focused on the sound of your heart. It was still beating. 
It was still beating.
“Sister!” He called. 
Sister Maggie, in all her wise-cracking wisdom, had known to be there. Matt didn’t know how, but not for the first time he was grateful for her presence. She helped without him having to ask. 
“Is she breathing?” She asked. 
“Barely. Her ribs are broken. I-I can’t tell how hard she hit her head.” He laid you on the bed, still listening to the semi-steady thump thump, thump thump. 
“Who is she?” 
He didn’t answer. Instead, his hands roamed your features, the gentle curve of your cheek now split with a bleeding gash. He ran a finger over your lips. As if to confirm it was really you. He had to feel, had to know. Know that this was his fault. Your words echoed in his head. 
You’d never hurt me.
You goddamn liar. 
You were here for him. The reckoning for his sins these past weeks. 
“Matthew, who is she?” Margaret pressed again. 
“It doesn’t matter,” he snapped. “Just help her.” Matt’s voice dropped to a whisper. “Please.”
Sister Maggie frowned, fingers clenched around the cloth she’d used to clean some of the blood. “You need to take her to a hospital.”
“Don’t.” Your voice rasped between them. “Don’t you dare.” You started to sit up, using shaking arms to push yourself upright even as your insides felt like they wanted to rip out of you just from breathing. 
“Stay down,” Matt said. He sat on the edge of the bed, easing you back to a lying position. “Try not to move.”
“I knew it.” 
“Y/N-”
“I fucking knew it.” You pushed back. He was stronger. Matt kept you down as gently as he could. 
“Sister, will you give us a minute?”
You turned to the woman you hadn’t noticed. She seemed glad to leave. 
Matt didn’t face you. He stood up from the bed and paced along the concrete floor, keeping a distance away that made you want to scream. You wanted to touch him. To make sure he was really there. But he hovered away from you like a ghost. 
“Those guys really did a number, huh?” You managed to sit up and this time, he didn’t stop you. Your head, however, wanted to bash itself in. Between the trauma and the liquor, you weren’t sure which made you more nauseous. “But the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen is always around to save the day.”
“You did it on purpose,” Matt said, shoulders stiff. “You provoked them. They could have killed you and you-” He sucked in a breath. “Why?”
“I’m an adrenaline junkie. I drink, I look for trouble. It’s becoming quite the hobby.” You were lying. You knew he could tell. 
He stood still, head tilting slightly. “You knew I’d come.” 
“Ding ding ding.” You fell back on the bed and let the ceiling spin. 
Matt couldn’t speak. The panic he’d felt was slowly being engulfed by anger, though it was hard to tell at who. You were looking for a fight, that much he gathered was true. You were drunk, though the fight sobered you up some. Everything he’d ever told you, everything he’d done to try and keep you safe, would have been thrown away tonight. You would have let those men kill you if it meant he wasn’t there. 
And it was all his fault. 
He did the one thing he promised he wouldn't. He left. You’d never judged him, never questioned his need to put on the suit. All you ever asked was that he come back to you and this time, he didn’t. By choice, he didn’t. Just like everyone in both of your pasts, he abandoned you. This was your choice to get back at him, whether or not you believed he was alive. 
“I saw you,” you said quietly. “Today, at the hotel. I knew it was you.” The sure, stubbornness in your voice was gone, replaced by a cracking, wrenching sadness. “I had to know.” 
Matt didn’t say anything. He just reached for the lamp and switched off the light. 
“Get some rest.” 
When you woke up, you were in the hospital, bandages on your cuts, and more hungover than you’d felt in a long time. 
Matt was gone. 
-
They didn’t discharge you, but you left anyway. If they looked too closely at your emergency contacts, they’d find someone who was supposed to be dead and Karen. The latter was not someone you wanted to face right now. 
So, with a couple of busted ribs and one hell of a concussion, you went back to the apartment. His apartment. The place where he first kissed you, first touched you, first-
Now it was just yours. He didn’t want it anymore. 
You half debated going back to the church and demanding he talk to you. You’d like to see the brilliant lawyer try to talk his way out of this one. But in the end, everything hurt too much to face him. You wanted a drink. 
Unlocking the door, the click hit your chest harder than any of that creep’s kicks. 
You knew. 
You may not have had his abilities, but you knew. 
Walking in, you didn’t dare turn around and look at the stairs. You didn’t have to. 
“I’m all better now if that’s what you wanted to see,” you said. You threw your jacket on the floor and kicked off your boots. 
Matt didn’t move from his place by the roof entrance. He stood over you like a judgemental god and you wanted to hit him for it. You might have if he didn’t already look like hell itself spat him back out. 
“You wanted them to kill you,” he whispered just loud enough for you to hear. Not an accusation. An acknowledgment. 
“I wasn’t going to stop them if they tried.” You shrugged. You moved to the kitchen. “Beer?” 
“You shouldn’t drink with the amount of pain medication they gave you.” He said it so matter-of-factly. Like he was just your boyfriend and looking out for you. But he wasn’t and you didn’t know what he was to you anymore. 
“Yeah, well, it’s going to wear off at some point so I might as well get ahead of the curve here.” 
“Y/N-” He stepped. The steps creaked. 
“Don’t.” You held up a hand. “Don’t come anywhere near me, Matt Murdock.” 
He flinched at the sound of his name like it was a blade you held against his throat. 
“Stay where you are,” you said and twisted off the bottle top, grasping so hard the rigid edge dug into your palm. “Shit.” It sliced your skin and your blood dripped onto the wooden floor. 
You didn’t watch him descend the stairs or cross the space between you. You closed your eyes so you wouldn’t see his hand grab yours, wrapping the small but deep cut with gauze he carried with him. You yanked away the moment his hold lightened. 
“Don’t touch me.” 
“Y/N-” He said again, your name hurting more than his own. 
“You’re dead!” Your scream filled the apartment. You knew it filled his head. Everything always did. Good. Let it. 
Matt didn’t step away, but he did let his hand fall back to his side. 
“I know.” 
You tried your best not to shake, not to cry and show the weakness you’d felt for the last weeks. Then again, you wanted him to know. You wanted him to feel everything you’d felt. 
“Tell me you were trapped somewhere. Tell me you tried everything you could to get back to us and you just broke free,” you pleaded. “Tell me a lie, Matt, because I’d rather hear that than whatever bullshit reason you can give me.”
He opened his mouth, but you didn’t let him speak, reading his face before he could say it. 
“I swear, if you say something about ‘protecting me’, then you should have just left me to those creeps because that would have been better than listening to that broken record again.” You turned your back and for that second, you let yourself crumple, but only for a second and completely silent. 
“It wasn’t about you.” 
You straightened up again. “It never was.” 
Now, with you facing away, it was his turn to break. Matt sucked in a sharp breath to keep himself together as you continued. 
“It was always about you, Matt. About your insisted martyrdom.” You didn’t try to stop your tears now, tasting their salt as they flowed past your lips. “Your city. The rest of us just live here, right?” You turned around, stepping towards him. “But at least we live.” With your hands on his chest, you pushed him back. “Which is a hell of a lot harder than hiding.” 
You pushed again and again and again and he just stood there and took it. Your flattened hands turned to fists, hitting harder and harder until you were sure you’d leave bruises on his chest. 
It was when you collapsed that he finally moved, throwing his arms around you before you could hit the floor, your legs giving out under the weight of your utter, complete agony. Your sobs choked you and rattled through Matt like gunfire. You kept fighting him, even as he held you, the pain of your injuries was nothing compared to what you felt in your soul. Like the shattered pieces were being forced back together, but didn’t fit anymore. 
Matt wanted to make it stop. He wanted more than anything to take all of the pain away and tell you it was going to be okay. He was here now. But he was the cause of it all and there was nothing he could do to change it. 
And while there was still a dark part of him that wanted to leave you here, to shield you from him entirely, Matt knew if he tried to walk away now, he wouldn't survive it. Daredevil or Matt Murdock, it didn’t matter. He was yours. 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered into your hair. 
“You were dead,” you said again, this time with broken words blending together with your sobs. “I tried to go back. I tried to get into Midland Circle, but they dragged me out. I tried, Matt, I-”
He cut you off with a kiss on the forehead and held you closer. 
“I know.” He could still hear your screams, your pleas to give up your life to try and save him. He’d thrown it away, everything you’d tried to make of him. Of the two of you, together. 
You’ll get her killed too. Fisk’s voice in his head pierced his skull like a blade. I will crush her. I’ll tear her apart piece by piece, Matthew, and there is nothing you can do to stop me. 
“She’ll put up a hell of a fight first,” Matt muttered. 
“What?” You pulled back to look up at him. 
He shook his head and held you closer still until the lines between you blurred together. 
“Nothing.” 
Even though every part of him now screamed to get away, he couldn’t move. Even as you knelt in front of him, pulling his lips down to yours, he didn’t fight it. A shock worse than any punch went through his system the moment you kissed him. Like every nerve was finally waking up. 
Maybe he wasn’t dead after all. 
Matt cupped your cheek with one hand and slipped the other to the small of your back, urging you to stand and walk with him to the bed neither of you had slept in in weeks. 
He’d decide in the morning.
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martybaker · 7 months ago
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There was only one couch
Tfw you cannot find the jayvik fic you crave so you write it yourself 🙃
I also gotta preface this with - I cannot write science talk for the life of me, in my defense they are sleep deprived so if it doesn’t make much sense, it’s not supposed to 🙈
—————————
They’ve been stuck at this problem for hours, any potential paths they managed to come up with immediately shattering after but a couple pokes of logic aimed to test the solidity of their foundations. Like bubbles popped by a child’s finger. Like heated corn kernels. Like dreams of making a difference-
Viktor’s too tired to think in metaphors.
He drops the pencil and swivels in his chair, facing Jayce who’s already draped across their shabby sofa, long legs sticking out from one end, head inclined on the armrest on the side closer to Viktor.
“What if we…build an oven?” Jayce says. “Well not like, an oven, but reverse, a device that could contain the energy and…,” he waves his hands in the air as he talks, as if that would help illustrate his train of thought, “…uhhh, we could more safely work on directing the charges? Fuck, I don’t even know what I’m trying to say.”
Viktor chuckles. He doesn’t know why he does, it’s not even particularly funny, the exhaustion must have erased any common sense of his that was left. Yet it’s…comforting to see that same exhaustion mirrored in Jayce. The same dark circles, the same bone deep tiredness weighing him down, the same look of frustration after they’ve been hitting dead ends and running in circles. It’s a shared exhaustion, just like the hard work is shared. Probably should have called it a night hours ago. They both direly need the rest.
“An oven? That would be your hunger speaking, I’m afraid,” Viktor says, reaching for his cane, grinding his teeth to gather the energy to push himself up onto his feet.
“Nah, m’not hungry,” Jayce mumbles. “We had those sandwiches for lunch. Or was it dinner? What time is it even?”
“Too late by all accounts,” Viktor says, taking the few steps towards the couch. He looks at Jayce, who seems glued to the couch and likely is planning to spend the night there. Viktor looks towards the door, but hesitates. The idea of the track across campus to his lodgings really doesn’t sound appealing.
It’s not even that far, the university tried to accommodate Viktor’s needs as best as they could and gave him a room on the ground floor, plus the building is the closest housing to the Engineering department’s laboratories. And yet, today it feels miles away. Damn his leg, damn all the stairs, and damn his hubris for yet again pushing his body beyond its limits, knowing fully well it will backfire ten folds and render him even more useless in the morning.
Jayce notices his hesitation, damn his partner’s bright mind too. He can read Viktor too well, he guesses the reason for his histation despite Viktor’s lack of complaining.
“Oh, do you wanna sleep here? I’ll head home, no problem,” he suggests way too readily, already hoisting himself up onto his elbows.
Viktor tsks and pushes against Jayce’s chest, pushing him back down into the couch.
“Stay,” he hisses. Jayce lives off campus, it would take him much longer to get home. Viktor’s not about to kick him out. And he doesn’t care for compassion either.
Jayce knows this, yet the man cannot help but be kind and caring, and though it irritates Viktor when it's aimed at him, it is also a quality of Jayce’s that he admires. He’s kind to everyone. Meets everyone halfway. Though at times they push too far, and Jayce lets them. Too kind for his own good.
Viktor shakes his head, trying to clean it, the stacked up piles of thoughts seem to have all spilled inside his brain and are rattling around. Rest. He needs to rest.
He looks at Jayce, who is still lying down on the couch, hands raised as if in surrender, big doe eyes staring at Viktor. Was Viktor too cross with him just now? He’s unable to determine. He pats Jayce’s knee in an attempt to smooth over his own prickly temperament.
“I just…I need to take a moment. Before I head out,” he tries. He hopes Jayce won’t insist. He is too tired to come up with reasonable arguments. He doesn’t wanna fight.
But Jayce doesn’t fight, he nods, then he bites his lip and opens his arms.
Hmm.
Viktor considers.
The couch is clearly too small for one grown man, let alone two.
Still it would be more comfortable than the chair.
And Viktor’s not averse to touch. Despite perhaps coming off as such. To everyone, except for Jayce.
It is true that he doesn’t like to be touched by strangers, especially unexpectedly. But he is human and just like anyone else, he has moments when he would welcome touch. Moments when he finds it comforting. And Jayce is a very tactile person. He didn’t hold back from putting a hand on Viktor’s shoulder the very first day they met, and he hasn’t stopped since. Though there was a moment near the beginning of their partnership when someone pointed out Viktor’s (alleged) aversion to touch and Jayce panicked, apologizing profusely for making him uncomfortable, and it took days for Viktor to convince him he really didn’t mind. Because that was the truth, Viktor didn’t mind. Not when it was Jayce.
Of course cuddling on the couch was an entirely different matter.
They’ve never done that before, however, Viktor wasn’t a stranger to the comfort of a warm body next to his either.
From cuddling with his parents for warmth as a kid in one too small bed, to seeking the pleasures of a lover to relieve stress, the warmth of a body next to his undoubtedly had its benefits.
And he and Jayce are friends. It wouldn’t be a big deal.
And so Viktor slowly drops his cane to the floor and lowers one of his knees to the couch, trying to figure out how to arrange himself next to Jayce.
Jayce tries to help but it takes some maneuvering, what with Viktor’s leg and their sleep deprived brains, there are a couple of winces and pointy elbows and just way too many limbs, an “Oof” from Jayce when he earns a knee to his stomach, but eventually Viktor finds himself situated with his back against the back of the couch, his head on Jayce’s chest, right leg on top.
It’s…it’s warm.
It’s nice.
It’s not a big deal.
“Okay?” Jayce checks.
Viktor hums. He can hear Jayce’s heartbeat, feel his breath on his forehead. Smell the musk, the odor of an unshowered body, but he has no right to complain, they both haven’t showered for however many hours or days they’ve been locked in here.
Jayce’s heartbeat and breathing slows, but Viktor cannot slow his racing thoughts. He can feel every point of contact where their bodies are touching. He can feel Jayce’s muscular chest moving under his hand. Jayce’s right hand briefly pets Viktor’s hair before it settles on top of his shoulders. Viktor fights against the urge to burrow closer, to inhale Jayce’s smell, to place Jayce’s hand back into his hair.
Stupid sleep deprived brain. Viktor could have figured such close proximity to a warm body would reduce him to animal instincts. He can only be glad he’s way too sleepy for his nether parts to react as well.
Jayce feels his restlessness. How could he not, pressed so close.
“Viktor,” he whispers, warm breath tickling Viktor’s forehead and despite himself Viktor exhales and melts against that strong chest even more. “You can rest, V, I’ll wake you in a couple of minutes and walk you home.”
My ass you will, Viktor thinks, we’re both gonna fall asleep here, your right side will be completely numb and my back will be killing me tomorrow. He’ll barely be able to stand. But he’s too tired and too comfortable to say any of that now. It’s a Tomorrow Viktor’s problem anyways. This Viktor burrows closer against Jayce’s chest, letting all his worries and all the problems fade, falling into the sweet embrace of sleep.
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silent-stories · 8 months ago
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𝐍𝐎𝐀𝐇 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐀𝐑𝐘 𝐁𝐄𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐀 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐃 𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 (but you love him anyway)
Pairing: Noah Sebastian x reader
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Noah had been counting down the days for weeks. He loved being on tour but he hated when you couldn’t go with him and he just wanted the moment when he stepped off that plane and into your arms to come soon. Your anniversary was today, and he was determined to make it special in the easy way he know you liked.
His original plan was simple: surprise you in the early morning, sneak in beside you when you were still in bed, and wake you with a kiss. Maybe breakfast in bed. He had even booked the flight to ensure he’d be home before you woke up.
But life had other plans.
It started with a delay, then another delay, and finally, after hours of waiting at the airport, the flight was canceled altogether. Noah had tried everything, getting on standby, begging at the counter for any way home, but there was nothing he could do but wait for another flight.
His texts to you in the morning had been hopeful. He didn’t want to let on just how worried he was. "I’ll be home soon," he'd written, trying to stay positive, but as each hour ticked by, the guilt gnawed at him. He was letting you down. He wasn’t going to be there. He was missing everything.
There were a lot of other people in the same situation as him and he couldn't even find a phone charging station with a free spot to save his dying phone.
"You can call her with mine, at least tell her that everything is fine and that you won't be able to make it in time." Folio had suggested.
"No, I can't not get there in time."
"Noah, it's almost nine pm and we're not yet-"
"I don't care. I just can't."
Folio had watched his friend walk nervously in circles until they finally boarded the plane that would take them home.
By the time he finally took the last possible flight, it was late. Way too late.
He was arriving home in the dead of night, long after the anniversary day had come and gone.
Noah pushed open the door to your shared apartment quietly, hoping you might somehow still be awake. He dropped his bags just inside the doorway and let out a long, tired sigh. His body ached from the hours of waiting and hoping.
In one hand, he held a bouquet of the most beautiful flowers he could find at the airport, a delicate mix of your favorite colors. Even though by now, it almost made no sense to give them to you anymore, for him.
The soft glow of the living room light drew him in. His heart squeezed when he saw you on the couch, curled up under a blanket.
You had fallen asleep waiting for him.
You must have tried to stay awake, hoping he’d make it in time. The coffee table was scattered with the remnants of a meal, something you had likely planned to share with him. Now, cold plates and empty glasses were all that remained of the evening that could have been.
Noah's throat tightened, and he dropped to his knees beside the couch. “Oh god…” he whispered to himself. “I’m so sorry.”
His hand gently brushed a strand of hair away from your face. You looked so peaceful, so beautiful, and he hated himself for disappointing you. You deserved so much better. He had promised you a perfect day, and instead, he had left you alone.
“Fuck. I’m such a shitty boyfriend,” he murmured. His hand trembled slightly as he touched your cheek. He hated himself for making you wait, for letting you down on the one day that mattered most to you both.
As if sensing his presence, you stirred. Your eyes fluttered open, blinking as you adjusted to the dim light. You saw Noah kneeling beside you, his face etched with guilt and exhaustion. Despite the late hour, your lips curled into a soft smile.
“You’re home,” you whispered, voice hoarse from sleep but filled with relief. You shifted under the blanket and sat up, blinking away the remnants of sleep as you looked at him.
He nodded. “I’m so sorry, love,” he choked out, shaking his head in disbelief at himself.
You weren't sure if the twinkle in his eyes was from the light or from the tears he was holding back.
“I missed everything. I wanted to be here so badly, but the flights—everything got delayed and canceled and...”
He trailed off, his voice catching as the tears threatened to spill over. "I ruined our anniversary. I’m such an awful boyfriend, I'm so sorry.”
You sat up fully now, heart aching at the sight of him on the verge of tears. Noah wasn’t one to get emotional like this, and seeing him so broken over something he couldn’t control made you want to pull him close and never let go.
“Oh, Noah…” you whispered gently, reaching for him. Your fingers brushed his cheek, wiping away the tear that had finally escaped. “You didn’t ruin anything.”
“But I—” he started, but you cut him off with a soft kiss. His breath hitched as your lips met his. You wanted him to know that it was okay. That you weren’t mad at him. That you were just glad he was finally home.
When you pulled back, his eyes were still glassy, but some of the guilt had begun to ease. “You waited up for me…” he murmured, glancing at the empty plates on the table, the melted candle wax that had once lit the room. “You did all this… and I wasn’t here.”
You shook your head, your fingers threading gently through his dark hair, your arms still gently resting around his neck.
“I did it because I love you. I wanted to spend the day with you, yes. But I’m not mad. How could I be mad when you tried so hard to get here? You can’t control flights, Noah.”
“I just… I wanted it to be perfect. You deserve that.” he whispered.
You cupped his face, your thumbs brushing the stubble on his jaw as you held his gaze. “You are perfect,” you said softly. “You being here is all that matters. I don’t care about the time or what we didn’t do. I care that you’re home safe. I care that you love me enough to try this hard. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
Noah’s chest tightened at your words. He didn’t know what he had done to deserve you, but in that moment, he knew he’d never take you for granted again.
“I love you,” he whispered, his forehead resting against yours. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too,” you whispered back, closing your eyes as you pressed another soft kiss to his lips.
When you finally pulled away, you patted the space beside you on the couch. “Come here. Sit with me.”
Noah didn’t hesitate. He climbed onto the couch, immediately pulling you into his arms. The warmth of your body against his was a comfort he hadn’t realized he’d been craving all day. You fit perfectly against him, your head resting on his chest as his arms wrapped securely around you.
That's when you noticed the bouquet sitting beside the coffee table, its soft colors peeking out from the edge of the crumpled brown paper around the flowers. You couldn’t help but smile as you picked it up and held it against your body.
"Hey, you got me flowers," you said softly, your voice filled with surprise and affection.
Noah’s eyes met the flowers in your hands, and he chuckled, his exhaustion still evident but softened by the hint of a smile. “Yeah, I... I got them for you this morning. I wanted it to be part of the surprise.”
You carefully examined the bouquet—a mix of pink roses, white peonies, and a few sprigs of lavender. It was beautiful, just like him. “They’re perfect, thank you.”
"I'm sorry that now they’re a bit-"
"Shut up. I said they are perfect. Thank you for this."
He let out a small laugh as you snuggled agaisnt him again.
You lay there in silence for a while, the weight of the day slowly fading as the steady beat of Noah’s heart lulled you into a peaceful calm. He kissed the top of your head and sighed, the last bit of tension in his body finally releasing as he held you close.
“I’m still sorry,” he whispered, his voice barely audible.
You smiled against his chest, snuggling closer. “You’re forgiven, Sebastian,” you said softly, a little chuckle leaving your lips. “Now stop apologizing and just be here with me."
He let out a soft laugh, a sound that made your heart swell. “Okay, okay. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”
And that was all you needed.
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Tags: @anything-more-than-human @ladyveronikawrites @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @fadingangelwisp @xmads-omensx @iwasntstable @thisbicc @pathion @mathfairchild1 @flowery-mess @into-the-grey @lma1986 @tosoundlessdarkistare @stardustsirenmelody @thewrstinme
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supercutszns · 1 year ago
Note
luke castellan comforting his gf?
btw i love ur work 💗💗
wc + pairing: 0.9k, luke castellan x reader
oh i really needed this,,, if i stop writing comfort fics i’m dead i will literally write a thousand of them over and over they could be exact replicas and i would not care. sorry this took such a long time i've been in a big writing slump and i really don't like this but we have to start somewhere <3 every time someone requests a comfort fic i get very happy inside! i know this isn’t my best work like at all but hopefully it’s enough for now
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Luke’s good at finding hidden things. A playing card wedged between wooden panels. A camper that always trudges at the back of the line. He can find something at its most sheltered and pluck it right back where it belongs. He’s good at that with you, too. When you wedge yourself somewhere tough, he slips through the cracks every damn time. 
You’re exhausted. You don’t know what time it is, how long you’ve been here, or how you can stop it. You just couldn’t get up this morning and your siblings let you stay sick. You imagine an alternate version of this day over and over, where you’re up and alive and contributing to something. But that’s not today. But it should be. You dream it until tears press against your eyes but you’ve got no energy to push them out. 
Feeling like this isn’t a constant occurrence, but it happens. Luke finds his way in each time, wedging open the slightest crack in your door or coming in through the window. He comes bearing gifts, he jokes. You don’t ask him where he gets the things he brings you—snacks, chocolate, plastic figurines to place on your windowsill. Menial things you like. Luke has his methods, and you know he loves you too much to reveal them. 
“Got some offerings for a goddess here,” he says when he sits down on your bed, knuckles brushing your arm. If you’re too tired to answer he never minds, he just crosses his legs and pulls your head into his lap. He smooths the hair away from your face to massage your scalp, and lets you rest. He doesn’t ask you for anything. Doesn’t force you to speak. You do when you’re ready. 
“I don’t feel good,” you admit hoarsely, blinking back tears. 
“That’s okay.” He leans down to kiss your forehead. “You just rest.”
It almost makes you laugh. “I’ve been in bed all day, Luke.”
“Mm, yeah, but you’re not really resting,” he says without judgement, letting you cling to his body as you pull yourself up to a seated position. “What’s on your mind, baby?”
You press your face into his neck so the warmth can distract you. Sometimes you say a lot, sometimes you say a little, like your mouth has separated from your body. It almost always ends with, “I feel like shit. I don’t know what to do.”
Luke is patient with you, but never overbearing. He knows you shut down when things are laid on too thick. “Want to take a nap?” He offers, threading his hands through your hair. “I can take you to my cabin, it’s cooler.”
He’s right, so you let him, and he steals you away without a fuss. The sheets smell like him, so even if you want to be alone, he still grounds you. When you fall into his bed you curl into a ball like an armadillo, like you can squeeze the rot out of your bones if you compress hard enough. Luke slots himself beside you after confirming it’s what you want, pressing kisses into your shoulder, until you turn into him and starfish over his body. “You let me know if you need anything, angel,” he murmurs, swiping your hair away from your face. “I’ve got you.” 
You manage to doze off, with his arms loose around your back and his chest underneath you. When you wake up later with a kiss of late afternoon breeze, you’re struck with the disorienting feeling of a good sleep. “Luke,” you mutter, digging your nose into his neck. 
He rouses too. “How’re you feeling?”
“Still bad.”
“Mm.” He kisses your forehead, squeezes you against him. “That’s okay. Want me to go grab you some food?” 
“Can we talk a little before?” 
“‘Course,” he says gently. He ghosts a kiss over your jaw. 
Sleep has pieced together some of the words you need, and Luke brings them out of you with hardly any effort. You have what’s probably a fragmented reason at best, but he doesn’t care. He keeps you anchored to him as long as you want him to, rubbing your back and letting you take your time. Once you’re done with the conversation, Luke diligently wipes your tears and kisses you. “Thank you,” you whisper.
“Anytime,” he grins. “I mean, I do love you. Nothing else I’d rather do.”
You let your forehead rest against his. Your throat feels thick but you get the words out, “I’m worried I’m going to feel this way forever.”
It doesn’t feel good to admit. Luke’s face softens, and he presses a kiss between your brows. “You won’t,” he murmurs, wrapping you in his arms. “You’ve got time.”
The length of the day moving around you matters a little less when Luke shields you from it. His knuckles rub across the ridges in your back until you’re sure the texture of his shirt is imprinted on your face. 
After he goes off to bring you some food, you find the strength to go wash your face in the bathroom. It’s practically nothing. Practically. At least you settle back into his bed, the blankets aren’t as heavy as before. You don’t feel better yet, but Luke’s got plenty of time for you. (He’ll pawn his kids off to Chris. None of them need this grilled cheese anyway.)
luke taglist: @sunniskyies @apollos-calliope @lillycore @sunny747 @m00ng4z3r @pabkeh @thaliagracesgf @theadventuresofanartist @bonnie-tz @ash-williamsss @sucker-4-angst @kitkat-writes-stuff @too-deviant @huang-the-geek @daughterofthemoons-stuff @jennapancake @idunnowhattonamethis @jarofshells @the-oracle-at-delphinitely-not @lauraisthebestyapper @nininehaaa
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dbnightingale24 · 4 months ago
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What Cha Doin' To Me?
A Lloyd Hansen Love Strory
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I told you guys it was coming and I meant it! My life has been such a shit show, and I'm so sorry this took so damn long! Between my Father being rushed to the hospital, and work being a shit show, I barely had time to breathe. HOWEVER, the final installation of this story is finally here! I honestly think I hate ending some of these stories because I invest so much into the characters :/ . Anyway, I hope you all enjoy the final part to this series! I may or may not have another Lloyd series in the works for you all...
Word Count: 33,581 (You know how I am at this point)
Warnings: SMUT (MINORS DNI), murder, drinking, self hate depression, FLUFF, Arguing, Family drama, Best Friends to Lovers, Hatred, Swearing, Anal Sex, Daddy Kink, So On and So Forth....
Song(s) That Inspired This Chapter: If Control Is My Religion, Then I'm Headed For Collision
Summary: For as much as Lloyd's life and business screw up your life, it's never enough for you to walk away. So now, you have to figure out how to deal with it, or if you even can at all.
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I do not give permission/consent for my stories/works to get posted elsewhere. I do not condone this type of behavior/relationship. This is purely for entertainment purposes only.
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“Why are you here?” you muttered, not looking up from your textbook as Lloyd plopped down on your bed.
“You didn’t come to my game, Sugar.”
“When do I ever go to your games? Didn’t you win, anyway?”
“Of course I did,” he chuckled and closed your book.
You scowled in annoyance and cut your eyes at him, “so shouldn’t you be out celebrating, or harassing some girl?”
“I wanted to celebrate with you.”
“Lloyd, I don’t feel like doing this with you today. Go away.”
“You know you love me.”
“Uh huh. Sure.”
“I love you.”“Lloyd, you don’t love anyone but yourself. Don’t bother me with your bullshit today, please.”
Anger flashed in his eyes as he took your face in his hand, “don’t ever say that to me again, you understand me?”
“Lloyd-”
“I mean it, Y/N. I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love you. And I never will.”
“Yeah, okay,” you scoffed with eye roll.
“I mean it, Y/N. You’re everything to me and you should know that by now. There’s not a thing I wouldn’t do for you, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe, and that will never change. I love you; even when you don’t want to hear it,” he promised sincerely.
All traces of humor withdrew from his face and you could see that he was dead serious. 
“I love you too, Lloyd.”
He said nothing as he pushed your books off the bed and pulled you onto his lap, your back against his chest, as he held you firmly. He pressed a kiss to the back of your ear and rested his head against the back of yours. 
“No matter what, Y/N; I will always love you,” he promised you softly.
Why did college have to end? All of this shit was so much simpler back when you both were young and didn’t have to worry about such grown up issues. Even when it was Hell, it was better than this.
“Lloyd, I know you’re angry but calm down,” Denny sighs, hands on his hips, and you can tell he’s exhausted.
You can’t blame him. After everything happened, Lloyd was quick to pack you and Rose (along with of a few of your belongings) into his car, and race to Denny’s house. Lloyd swore up a storm while Rose cried in the backseat and you had a stress migraine the size of Delaware building inside your head; because of course.
“Don’t fucking tell me to calm down!” Lloyd roars, and you cringe as you sip your drink while Dana rubs your back. “That cunt came after my family, and you want me to calm down?! If it happened to you-”
“They’re my family too! You two are all Dana and I have with the exception of Charlie! I play it just as close to the chest as you do! I’m furious! However, we can’t just run into this based on emotions alone, especially now, she’ll expect it. So calm the fuck down, and we’ll come up with a plan.”
“Denny-”
“Calm down!”
You don’t even try to stop the tears as they come streaming down your face. Dana wraps you in a tight hug.
“It’s gonna be okay, babe. Just take deep breaths,” she coos, trying to calm you down.
“Rose almost died and it’s my fault-”
“It’s not. Don’t do that to yourself.”
“Why not?! It’s true!”
“Jesus, I know what happened tonight is awful, but the security? Denny, work on that shit,” Charlie snaps as she makes her way to you and enveloping you in a hug. “What can I do?”
“Nothing. No one can do anything. I’m a terrible guardian.”
“That’s bullshit and you know it!”
“She almost died-”
“But she didn’t. From what I hear, you were pretty fucking brave. Yeah, Lloyd is the one who went out there but you were armed and ready, too. There isn’t anything you wouldn’t do for that girl and all of us know that. And so does Rose. You’re so far from being a terrible guardian, so don’t put yourself down. How’s the little one doing?”
“She’s asleep upstairs. I held and rocked her while we watched ‘Sailor Moon’ until she passed out. God, I don’t know what the hell I’m gonna do on Monday-” “She’s not going to school,” Lloyd interjects. “I don’t trust any of those fucks to keep her safe.”
“Well, what do you want me to do, Lloyd?! She has to go to school. She has to receive a fucking education! We can’t stop taking her because-”
“We can home school her!”
“And who’s to say that’s not as much of a threat as her going to school? Sophia clearly knows what she’s doing, she got her people in the house already once, so literally nothing is safe!” you yell, almost sneering.
“Don’t. Don’t you dare fucking put this on me-”
“Lloyd, I swear to GOD, you better not be absolving yourself right now. Don’t go there.”
“I’m sorry, did I not try to keep from all of this crazy shit? Did I not-”
“WHO MARRIED THE BITCH OUT OF SPITE?! WASN’T ME!” you scream at him as he slightly recoils. “It wasn’t some fucking terrorist that did this, or an angry employee, it was your fucking wife! If you could’ve just stopped being a fucking child for five seconds, this wouldn’t have happened! She’s your fucking wife and I’m the whore you play house with! Now look at where we are!” you sniffle while your tears resume flowing.
It feels like the world stops spinning, just for a moment. You know that the last thing you need to be doing right now is blaming Lloyd, but you just have so many damn emotions and you don’t know what to do with them. No, Lloyd isn’t your punching bag, but he’s the only person you can share the blame with, even if this is on you.
You could’ve been stronger. You should’ve been stronger. Yes, Lloyd is the love of your life, but Rose is your world. That should have dominated any and all feelings you have towards Lloyd. For as much as you want to pass the blame, you can’t and don’t. This is on you.
“Sugar-”
“Do NOT fucking ‘Sugar’ me right now! You married her just to fucking spite me and now look! Susan and Bernie are dead and she almost-”
“I wouldn’t have let anything happen to her!”
“You’re not God, Lloyd! You can’t keep us safe simply because you want to! That’s not how this shit works! You wanted to keep me safe from all of the terrible people in the world, remember? So how is it that the worst one turns out to have your last name?!”
“Sugar-”
“I can’t fucking look at you right now,” you scoff, getting up and storming out of Denny’s office. “Fix this,” you snap at him before leaving the room, with Charlie and Dana on your heels. 
You know you owe him the biggest apology. You also know you’ve made him feel like the biggest pile of shit, but you can’t find it in yourself to apologize at the moment. You can’t find it in yourself to give him a break because he’s never given you one. 
“I feel like I’m being split into two,” you sob sitting on the kitchen floor.
“That’s a fair emotion to feel right now,” Charlie sighs, sitting beside you as Dana pours three glasses of whiskey. “She’s safe, Y/N. That’s all that matters.”
You sigh as you run a frustrated hand through your hair, “I shouldn’t have attacked Lloyd like that.”
“He deserves-”
“No, he really doesn’t. Hes stepped up in ways that I didn’t even think were possible. He treats Rose as if she’s his own daughter. He loves her to her core. He loves me unconditionally. He always has. I shouldn’t have lashed out like that. He’s already hurting and I had...he doesn’t need that right now.”
“You both always find a way to work things out, and I know this won’t be any different. You guys just need time,” Dana reassures you as she gives both you and Charlie filled glasses before sitting on the floor herself.
You roll your eyes after you take your sip. “You don’t even like Lloyd.”
“As if that’s ever stopped you,” Dana laughs, “you two were made for each other.”
“What if we fell in love with normal men? What if we just decided to choose simplicity?”
“We’d still be on the floor, drinking our emotions away,” Dana sighs as you and Charlie burst out laughing.
Sometimes all you really need is your best friends.
~~
“You could just come to a party,” Lloyd sighed as he jogged up to you.
“You could just accept that, that’s not my scene.”
“Why? Because it’s out of your comfort zone?”
“Lloyd, college is out of my comfort zone. I just have no desire to go to a mindless, meaningless college party.”
“Well, what do you wanna do tonight?”
“Drink too much, eat too much, and watch a black and white movie. Or Sailor Moon”
“You have the strangest taste in entertainment, Sugar,” he laughed, “but I’ll be here.”
“Why don’t you actually go and do things you enjoy?” you scoffed as you two reached your dorm room.
“What do you mean?”
“Why don’t you go to the parties or go see one of your many girlfriends?”
“Sugar, I only ever want to spend my time with you. Yeah, I get my dick wet sometimes, but that’s only because you won’t let me inside.”
“Lloyd.”
“Fact of the matter is that I always want to spend all of my time with you. I love you.”
You roll around, groaning, as you try and shake off the rest of the memory. It feels like forever ago. Your eyes flutter open and you try to remember how you even got to bed.
“I carried you up,” Lloyd mumbles, as if he’s reading your mind, and you jump. “You practically melted onto the kitchen floor.”
You look to him before looking down at your hands. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry. I ruined-”
“Lloyd, I was really out of line. I had no right to say what I said-”
“Yes you did-”
“I made the choice, Lloyd. That’s on me. I can’t blame you for decisions I make.”  
“It’s not like I gave you much-”
“For as much as you’re a dick, you only go as far as I allow. You didn’t force me into this. I’m in love with you, and I know I always have been. I just needed someone to yell at because I felt miserable, and you were there. I made you my punching bag and that was wrong.”
He sighs as he takes a seat next to you on the bed. “It’s not like I don’t deserve it.”
“Lloyd, we have both hurt each other in big and small ways-”
“Sugar, I provoke you. You rightfully tell me when I’m being a piece of shit and I lash out.”
“I know, and still choose you over everyone. I can’t blame you for the choices I’ve made. I actively chose you and, if given the chance, I’d do it again. I can’t yell at you for a decision I made consciously.”
“If you want out, now is-”
“What’s the point?” you laugh humorlessly. “Everyone knows it. Breaking up won’t change the fact that people know how much I mean to you. It won’t stop Sophia. I’m all in and we...we’ll do everything we can to keep Rose safe. By the way, where is Rose?”
“Denny and Dana took her out, to try and get her mind off of things for a  bit,” he sighs, pulling you over and onto his lap. “I want us to work, Sugar. I’ve never been afraid of anything, but losing you and now with Rose in the picture...I’m trying my best here.”
“I know you are, baby,” you mumble, laying your head on his shoulder. “I promise to never do what I did last night-”
“You had every right, Sugar. This is my fault. Sophia was never anything more to me than a distraction. I had no business marrying her, but I was hurt. It hurt that you didn’t give me what I wanted, but you were taking yourself out of the picture completely. How can I blame you? When we were younger, it was one thing, but actually committing to you...I was terrified of fucking this up. Hell, I’m still terrified of fucking this up. So, when everything went to shit, I knew I couldn’t just throw money at you or buy your affection. It never worked in the past, so I knew it wasn’t going to work now. I was so focused on finding the right way to go about approaching you that I stopped focusing. If I had been paying closer attention, like I know how to do, none of this would be happening and Rose would still have her grandparents.”
“Lloyd-”
“Just...I tried to downplay my feelings for you when we first met because I wasn’t sure what the hell I was feeling. You were so small, but you had so much fire inside,” he chuckles softly and you bashfully grin in return. “Yeah, I thought you were gorgeous, but I was in awe of you. No one had ever spoken to me like that; no one ever called me on my shit. Women always got turned on by me being a douche bag, and guys have always been too afraid to challenge me...for the most part. You didn’t even hesitate and you weren’t afraid. From day one I was obsessed, and I’m afraid its only gotten worse over time.”
“Ya don’t say,” you tease, gaining a small laugh from him.
“You’ve just...you’ve always been the one person who can make or break me, Sugar. I know I’m an asshole, I’m selfish, I’m cruel, and a million other terrible things but you find a way to turn all that off. It terrifies me, you terrify me, and I don’t know how to be without that. Without you. I love you, Y/N. I am so insanely and madly in love with you, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry for all of this, because it’s not what I wanted. At all. I had it all worked out in my head and then...then I fucked it up. I can’t fix all of the shit I did in the past, but I can promise you a better future.”
“Lloyd, it’s not like I don’t believe you. I know we want the same thing, but are you sure you can do this? It won’t be just me that you hurt if-”
He chuckles humorlessly and shakes his head, “Sugar, you don’t understand, it’s like I told Sophia the other night: everyone was just a filler because I couldn’t have you. You’re the only woman I’ve had to work this hard for, and for as much as I love that, I really fucking hate it,” he scowls and you burst out laughing. “All of the other flings and ‘relationships’ were just vanity and me attempting to get over you when you were in a new relationship. My endgame was always leaving whoever it was I was with if you were around. The only reason Sophia stuck was because you were in your last real relationship for so long that I wanted to hurt you, or at best, annoy you. I had to give you my best shot. I was gonna breakup with her that night we went to that steakhouse for dinner, but...”
“But what?”
“Something about the way you and that waiter spoke to each other- I know you weren’t flirting, Sugar,” he reassures as you scowl. “I just...it’s so easy for you to find anyone. As much as I’d like believe differently, you don’t need me. Even in your darkest hours, you’ve always been so sure of yourself and strong... and for as much as you hated whatever situation you were dealing with, you handled it like it didn’t even phase you. After my first day of irritating you, I was hooked, I needed more.”
“Lloyd-”
“Believe it or not, I tried to avoid you for two weeks, but it was pointless. Trying to stay away from you has always felt pointless because I’ve always needed you.”
“Lloyd...I love you so much, but this...us. You’ve got to be all in on this. Last night wasn’t so much about us being attacked as it was who did it. I know that being with you comes with risks, and I have no choice but to accept them. It was more because of who and why it escalated to the level it did. You have to cut this shit out for good. It’s not just you and me. Rose is everything to me, and shes already lost so much. You wouldn’t just be hurting me, you’d crush her because she thinks the world of you. You have to grow up. So don’t say all of these things and make all of these promises, if you can’t keep them, Lloyd,” you sob softly.
He presses a soft kiss to your forehead as he holds you tighter. “I’m all in, Sugar. I swear on my life, I won’t fuck this up. I want this with you. I want everything with you. I just need you to give me time to fix this, Sugar. Can you give me that? Can you trust me enough?”
“Lloyd...”
“I know, Sugar. I’ve fucked up a lot and I’ve hurt you, but you know that my heart is yours. It’s always been yours, and you know that.”
“I’m not dealing with you hooking up with-”
“I won’t even kiss her, Sugar. I’m working out a plan with Denny, and when we have all the information, I’m gonna setup a dinner.”
“None of this falls back on Rose.”
“Of course.”
“I mean it, Lloyd.”
“I know it’s a big ask, but please trust me.”
“I trust you, Lloyd,” you promise sincerely.
He presses another soft kiss to your forehead and sighs in contentment, “I love you, Sugar.”
“I love you so much, Lloyd.”
“What do you wanna do?”
“Can we just stay like this for a while? It’s been so long since we’ve had a calm moment.”
Lloyd takes in your scent and rests his chin on the top of your head. “We can do whatever you want.”
You wonder if this is what happiness feels like, simply laying around with the one you love the most. You know the road ahead is going to be long and bumpy, but with Lloyd truly by your side for the first time, it doesn’t feel impossible. For the first time ever, you finally see the hint of morning light after what feels like a lifetime of tempests. 
Lloyd’s P.O.V.
“There you are, Sugar! Been lookin’ all over for you for weeks!” I lied with a slick grin.
The truth of the matter is that I’d been watching your every move, not sure if I should pursue you or not.
You rolled your eyes and muttered, “Lloyd,” with pure disdain.
I fuckin love it.
“So you have heard of me.”
“Kind of hard to miss the way every girl talks about the biggest asshole on campus. Didn’t take long to figure you out.”
“Awh Sugar, I’ve never done anything to you.”
“I plan to keep it that way.”
“Of all the ornery females.”
“Fun fact: women don’t like being called ‘females’.”
“You’re somethin’ else, you know that?”
“Lloyd? Leave me alone.”
“What’s the fun in that?”
“You’re insufferable, did you know that?”
I chuckled before I tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, “and yet you suffer me fine. Dare I say that you make suffering look good?”
All signs lead to that I should’ve left you alone, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t then and I can’t now. I was in love with you. I will always be in love with you. You’re the only anchor I have in this life, and you’ll always be the only person I can be my real and true self with. I really have tried to turn it off time and time again, but I can’t. All I see in this life, and I’m sure in any other life, is you. 
I want to be better for you, and should be better for you, but I can’t; not yet anyway. I’ll figure it out though, because I don’t know how to live a life that you’re not in, and I don’t want to find out. My life only makes sense when you’re in it.
“Uncle Lloyd,” Rose asks softly, pulling on my hand which tugs me back into the world in front of my eyes.
“What’s up, Buttercup?”
“Can I ask you something?”
“You can ask me anything.”
“What do you do for a living?”
It was bound to happen sooner or later. Might as well get it out of the way now.
“I work for the government.” She stops and deadpans me. “Uncle Lloyd.”
I can’t stop myself from laughing a little, “I do.”
“I might be 10, but I know there’s more to it than that.”
“I do jobs that most people can’t.”
“Do you hurt people?”
“Sometimes, yeah.”
“Have you ever killed anyone?”
“You shouldn’t ask people that, they might find it rude.”
“That means yes,” she mutters.
I get down on one knee and focus her attention on me, “I would never hurt you or Twinkle, Buttercup. I would never let anyone hurt either of you.”
“Someone did try and-”
“Exactly, they tried. I’ll never let anything like that happen again, I promise.”
“Are you going to stay?”
“As long as Twinkle will have me,” I laugh softly.
“I want us to be a real family,” she admits sheepishly, and I hate how much it pulls at my heartstrings.
“Working on it, Buttercup. I promise.”
“Are you gonna ask her?”
“When the time is right and everything’s sorted.”
“Do you have the ring?”
“Not yet.”
“Then why are we going for ice cream? You need to find the perfect ring, and I know just the one!” 
“You think she’ll say yes?”
“Over and over again,” Rose smiles. 
“Now, I have a question and I want you to answer me truthfully.”
She nods, “I promise.” 
“I know Twinkle is your legal guardian, and we both just established that I’m gonna propose, but...”
Jesus, why the fuck am I so nervous? I’ve killed world leaders before. I can fucking do this. Commitment, man. What a thing.
“We’ve both established that I’m going to propose,” I repeat, trying to steady my nerves, “but...do you want...are you okay with...fucking hell-don’t repeat that,” I tell her sternly as she giggles. “What I’m trying to ask is...do you want me to be your legal guardian, too? Do you want me to adopt you?”
She wraps her tiny arms around my neck, and gives me the tightest hug she can muster before kissing me on the cheek. “YES!”
Love has turned me into the softest scab because I can’t believe I’m fighting off tears. This is why I hate kids.
“Are you sure, Buttercup? You can tell me-”
“I’ve never really had a Dad,” she sniffles, backing up after letting go of me. “I guess I’ve never really had a Mom either. I had my grandparents, but they were always my grandparents, not my parents. With you and Twinkle, in an odd way, it feels like you both are my parents. We act like a family, we do things that a family would. Twinkle is my best friend in the world, and you...you fit. Whenever you’re around, I feel like we’ve found the missing piece. I know you and Twinkle went through some bad stuff, and I know that’s hard, but I’m happiest when we’re all together. I want you to adopt me, because you and Twinkle feel like home,” she finishes with a big smile and wide eyes, looking more hopeful than she has in days. 
Now I’m the one crying and hugging her. Fuck, when did this become the life that I want? Fuckin’ kids.
Before you, the idea of wanting any of this felt so foreign to me. Now I crave it. I need to be a family, I need to marry you, and I need to keep you both close. I don’t know how I’ll survive any of this without you. Why the hell did it take me so long to understand? We could’ve gotten to this so much faster if I’d just gone after you the way I always wanted to.
Fuck me.
“Here’s what we’ll do: I know it’s gonna take some time, but I’ll wait until after I propose to ask her about adopting you, okay? I think we should look at rings today, find a good one and take picture of it. We’ll send it to Charlie and Dana, and see what they think, too. What do you think?” I sniffle with a smile.
“It’s perfect!”
“Lets get to the jewelry store then,” I chuckle, standing up and wiping my eyes.
“Really?”
“You said you know the perfect ring. Lead the way,” I laugh softly.
“Uncle Lloyd?” she calls softly, taking my hand.
“Yeah?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, Buttercup.”
I never thought I’d be a family man, and I never wanted to be a family, but you? You’ve changed everything, and now there’s no going back. There’s honestly nothing that will make me happier or more content than starting a life with you. You and Rose are my home, and I’ll do everything in my power to make sure you two always know and live that truth. The first step is to kill my first my wife. The second?
Securing my future with you and Rose and letting the adventure begin.
~~
Read the rest here...
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luci-in-trenchcoats · 2 months ago
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Recovery
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Summary: After stopping the attack on Jackson and Joel, the reader has to navigate if he'll be able to make it through his injuries and what life could look like for him...
Pairing: Joel Miller x reader
Word Count: 2,300ish
Warnings: The Last of Us Season 2 spoilers, language, graphic mention of injury
A/N: This episode takes place immediately after 2x02 and changes a few things about the events in that story...Enjoy!
___________
Your head was pounding as you sat in a plastic chair just inside the entrance to the clinic. Around you screams and moans filled the hallways, the noise grating on your nerves. Part of you wanted to leave, run out to the cool air outside. Part of you knew that air smelled like death, the snow covered road painted with blood and dead infected.
“Y/N.” You looked up, surprised to find Tommy standing there, a hand on your shoulder. He looked drained, exhaustion etched into every line. God, he seemed to have aged ten years in a matter of hours. “Have you seen the doctor?”
You smiled. After everything that happened today, everything that happened with his brother and Ellie, he was still asking about you.
“I did and I’m fine,” you said. Tommy gently touched a gloved hand to your bruised cheek, worry in his eyes. “Joel’s in with Dr. Mack. They don’t know if they can save the leg. He doesn’t know if he’ll…”
“He’ll keep fighting until he can’t,” said Tommy quietly. You closed your eyes, swallowing down the panic in your gut. “Ellie?”
“Banged up but she’ll be out of here soon.” You frowned, slowly letting your eyes open, Tommy taking a seat beside you. “What if I hadn’t shown up?”
“They’d probably both be dead then,” he said quietly, resting a hand on your knee. “How’d you convince Maria to let you take Junior on a 24-hour patrol last night?”
“The little shit thinks he’s all that. Cocky ass eighteen year old. Figured it was a good punishment for him to miss New Year’s Eve and spend the night in the cold doing recon drills,” you said.
“You probably saved that kids life. He would have been on the wall otherwise.” You hummed. “He is your brother.”
“My kid brother,” you corrected. “Ellie’s not a brat like him.” Tommy raised his eyebrows, waiting for your eye roll. “Okay, she’s a brat too but a normal teenage brat. Junior is…Junior.”
“How’d he handle himself at the house?” 
“Honestly? When I walked in that room, Joel was half…” You shook your head, taking a breath. “He was on the ground and they had Ellie pinned down. If it was just me, I could have taken a couple out but they probably would have killed me too. Junior did good today. He protected Ellie while I got Joel.”
“Did you tell him that?” 
“I tried. He went back into the clinic a while ago to help with somebody’s broken arm. I haven’t seen him in hours.” You both froze when you saw Dr. Mack come down the hall, covered in bloody scrubs. Tommy stood up, grasping your hand.
“Is he…” Tommy trailed off, Dr. Mack offering a small smile. 
“He made it through surgery. He’ll live.” You both exhaled deeply, your eyes closing shut. “He’s not going home anytime soon but his stats are good.”
“Will he walk again?” you asked quietly, rising to your feet. Dr. Mack pursed his lips.
“Most people, a shotgun to the leg like that, it’s an amputation. But his major arteries were intact and it somehow wasn’t a direct hit to the bone. Long story short, we kept the leg. We’ll have to see how healing and physical therapy goes. We may need to remove it down the line. But this is Joel we’re talking about. If anyone can come back from this, it’s that bastard. You can go back and see him if you want.”
You left Tommy and went back into the recovery bay of the clinic, past dozens of injured bodies. Dr. Mack showed you into a quiet room, worry filling your gut again when you saw Joel on a gurney, a thin sheet over his middle, tubes and wires stuck in him.
You startled when his eyes flickered open, gaze wandering to the thick wad of bandages wrapped around his left leg.
“H-hey,” you said, approaching his side, Joel looking up at you, his eyes worried. “Ellie’s okay.”
His body visibly relaxed, trying to communicate with only a flick of his eyes. You nodded, carefully putting a hand on top of his head.
“When you’re better, you’re going to tell me what the hell happened out there.” He closed his eyes, chest rising and falling softly. “Alright. You can tell me later.”
He was quickly asleep, Tommy meeting you in the hallway with a frown. “Y/N, I need your help.”
“Hey, I know he’ll need a lot of help going forward. I’m going to be there-”
“That’s not what I mean,” he said, pulling you towards the front of the clinic. You walked outside, Tommy rubbing his jaw. “We lost Rowan in the attack.”
“What?” you whispered. Rowan was your Chief of Security. Tommy was heavily involved with your protocols and things but Rowan’s job was overseeing everyone assigned to patrol duty. Training. Routes. Council business. The guy was only forty. He was supposed to have that job for decades.
“Council wants you to fill the spot in the interim.” You shook your head, Tommy giving you his puppy dog eyes. “Just until Jackson gets back on it’s feet. Three months tops.”
“Tommy, Joel needs me.”
“Joel is not getting out of the hospital for at least three months and we both know it. I won’t let it interfere with him and you, I swear. Please Y/N.” You went to protest, Tommy frowning. “The town is hurting right now. We don’t need another soldier. We got plenty of those. We need a strategist like you and if you’re able to wrangle my brother, then you can do this in a heartbeat.”
“...Three months.”
“That’s all I ask.”
Three Months Later
You woke up from the kitchen table with a start, a paper stuck to your face. Looking around you caught sight of Ellie, a cheeky grin on her face. 
“Good morning,” she said, peeling a sheet off of you, examining it before walking over to a cabinet. “So when do I get to go back on patrol, huh?”
“When I clear you,” you grumbled, wincing as you stood up and stretched. God, you had to stop sleeping in that fucking chair or else your back would be fucked up by the time you hit 35. You finally took her in, Ellie in her pajamas, your eyebrows raising. “Did, did you sleep in the house last night?”
“I moved back in a few weeks ago. You’re so busy you haven’t noticed,” she said with a shrug, taking out a jar of half-eaten peaches, picking them out with her fingers. You stared at her, blinking slowly. You’d asked her months ago to move into the house but were met with her usual teenage angst. In another six months she’d be twenty. Honestly, you were surprised she hadn’t asked the council for a home of her own yet.
“Why?” you asked quietly, Ellie shrugging.
“Joel’s coming home soon and he’ll need help. You work a lot and so, yeah. Don’t make a big deal out of it.” 
“Okay.” You nodded, getting out a bowl and fork for yourself, dishing up some peaches into it. She watched you, her eyes focused. “What?”
“Did Joel ever tell you why he was attacked by those people?” Ellie asked. You bit a peach slice and shook your head. You wanted answers but he spent most of his first month in the hospital laying there in pain. The past two had been focused on trying to get his leg working again. He didn’t want you around for that and with how much you’d been working, you didn’t get to see him aside from the evenings. And you had a feeling whatever the story was, a hospital full of people to overhear wasn’t the place. So you waited, as patiently as you could. 
“I’m sure he’ll tell us when he’s home,” you said. Ellie stopped eating, wiping her fingers on her jeans. “Listen, El…I know you two weren’t on the best terms but-”
“We’re good.” You raised an eyebrow, Ellie staring at you, a sliver of wetness in her eyes that she blinked away. “Joel and I are good.”
“Does he know that you two are good?” She shrugged. “You should tell him that. He’s missed you.”
“I was angry at him…and we talked New Years Eve and I was still so mad but I said I’d try to forgive him but then he almost…and I just don’t want to be mad at him anymore,” she said, voice shaky as she finished. You nodded, pulling her into a hug she easily accepted. “How do I tell him I forgive him?”
“That was pretty good.” You both turned your heads, Joel standing in the front doorway with a crutch and a soft smile. 
“How…” You shook your head as Ellie rushed over, wrapping him up into a hug. He returned it with one arm, the other on his crutch. His left leg was in a sturdy black brace, surprinsgly new looking.
“I’m sorry,” Ellie mumbled, Joel shushing her. 
“No, I am for hurting you,” he said quietly. “You’re okay?” 
She nodded, Joel squeezing her tight for a few moments as you stood back and watched. You smiled to yourself, Joel whispering something before Ellie was humming and rushing outside, promising to be back soon. 
“Where’s she run off to?” you asked, watching him take a slow step forward, wincing a bit. 
“Asked her to run over to Seth’s. Got a welcome home cake waiting for me,” he said, looking you up and down with a smirk. “You’re still here?”
“Didn’t you know? I’m into senior citizens with limps,” you said, Joel grinning harder than you’d seen in years. 
“I thought it was just men with twenty years on ya, little shit,” he said.
“What can I say, I would have been a gold digger in a normal life,” you shot back, Joel smiling as he took another step closer. You shook your head, swallowing thickly. “How are you…”
“A lot of therapy and the crutch has most of my weight. A patrol went out to Boulder, found some medical supplies. Some guy that was an engineer tinkered with a brace and mocked this up.” You stepped over to him, placing a careful hand on his chest. “I won’t be winning any races anytime soon but I’m alive and still standing which is more than I could have hoped for.”
You guided him to sit on the couch in the family room, returning with a glass of water and your bowl of peaches. He happily took both, watching you carefully as he ate. 
“Your nose.” He ran a finger over the tiny bump on the bridge. “When’d you break it?”
“That day,” you said quietly. “You were so out of it that first week. I don’t think you noticed.”
“Listen-”
“Don’t say thank you.” He snapped his mouth shut, looking at you through his lashes. “Just…just take it easy and try to spend some time with Ellie. She’s missed you.”
“Anyone else miss me?” You rolled your eyes, Joel keeping his gaze on you. “I’m serious.”
“Why are all men so stupid?” you asked, leaning over and turning his jaw, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. “Of course I did.”
“Did Ellie tell you anything…” You shook your head. “I know you have questions. But I need to talk to her first before I give you answers.”
“Is this about how she’s immune?” He froze like a statue, eyes flared wide ever so slightly. “I heard you two fighting one night about a year ago. The day Eugene died.”
“Why’d you never say anything?” You frowned, leaning back into the cushions.
“Because she deserves to feel safe in her own skin.” He was quiet, closing his eyes eventually.
“S’why those people attacked me. Back when Ellie and I first met, I was meant to take her to the Fireflies, hope that they could make a cure form her. But to do that, they’d have to kill her. Ellie never had a choice in the matter. I just couldn’t…I killed them all, including that girl with the braid’s father. That’s why they came.”
“Alright.” He turned his face away, breathing deeply.
“Ellie would have picked to die. It’s why we’ve been so…I lied to her about what happened in Salt Lake. She hated me for it. I think when I get better, she’ll hate me again,” he breathed out.
“No she won’t.” He faced you, his brow furrowed, eyes welled up. “She won’t. She moved back in this house for you. She tried to save you. She sat in that hospital room while you were unconscious for weeks. Your daughter loves you Joel.”
“I don’t know that she does anymore,” he said quietly. 
“Love is not words. It’s action and you have no idea just how much she loves you. She’d have burned down the world for you. Be gentle with each other and it’ll be alright.” You picked up the bowl of peaches, holding the fork out to him. “Eat up. You need your strength.”
He took the fork but held it up to you, waiting until you took a bite to pull it away. “You look like you could use a break yourself.”
“It’s been a long few months,” you said, a large thud occurring upstairs followed by a string of curses directed at Ellie. Both your heads snapped up, Joel shaking his head. “Junior and Ellie are getting along as good as always you can see.”
“She tie his foot to the bedpost again?” You hummed, Joel smirking. “Some things never change at least.”
“Welcome home, Joel,” you said softly, tucking into his side, burying your fact in his neck.
“Thank you,” he whispered, kissing your temple. “For everything.”
____________
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