#LESS THAN FIFTY DAYS. IM EXPLODING

[serpentinespider]

is it over for me be honest /silly

[moth-doe]

Life From Death

Katalina ducked behind a tree as the grenade went off, cursing through her teeth. The day had started off just fine. They had left the base camp to find the German Infantry and crush them. The year was 1945, the date February Sixteenth. It was a Wednesday at 14:10 PM. The sky was cloudy, promising an incoming snowstorm. They had trudged through the German forest trying to find the Infantry. Their orders; shoot on sight. Any survivors would be taken prisoner. But they had miscalculated and the Mexican Infantry of 200 Soldiers found themselves ambushed.

“Take cover and fire!” She shouted to the soldiers under her command. Katalina had enlisted at age 15 and climbed to the ranks of Colonel, the youngest ever and the first female. She had fought her way to the top tooth and nail and wasn’t going to let anyone defeat her and prove that girls couldn’t fight well. The 20 year old loaded her gun and fired at the Germans, their red armbands sticking out against the snow like a sore thumb. The bodies of both Mexicans and Germans littered the snow, staining it red with blood. A bullet hit her in the wrist, going straight through her carpal and out the other side. She bit down on her tongue to refrain from screaming.

“C-Coronela...” Katalina heard a shaky voice from behind her. She whipped around to see Nandito, her youngest soldier, holding his chest. Blood was staining the fourteen year old’s hands and clothes and he was shaking. Katalina moved to his side and helped him lie down. She took his weapon from him.

“Calmate soldado. You fought well.” She stroked his brown hair with her injured hand. “You’re so brave. You did well. I’m proud of you. Your Mamá will be proud of you too.” He choked and sobbed and held onto her arm.

“Coronela- por favor! Don’t let me die! I don’t want to die! I’m scared-I don’t want to go. I-I made a promise to Carlotta I would come back... Le pr-prometí que volvería a casa y nos casaríamos- He m-matado a hombres. V-Voy a i-ir al i-infierno. P-Por favor, n-no me dejes m-morir e ir al infierno!” His words broke Katalina’s heart.

“You aren’t going to Hell, mi hermano.” She stroked his face. “I’ll explain everything when we meet again. Now put down your weapon. Sleep.” She took his weapon from him. She took one of her medals off her chest and pinned it to his uniform. “You’ve earned it, brother.” Nandito choked and sobbed and held onto her before finally his body went limp and he gave one final breath before the life faded from his eyes. Katalina, with angry tears in her eyes, closed his eyelids and kissed his forehead. She stood up with both her weapon and his and anger burning in her heart.

“¡Los soldados! Carga y fuego! Dejar a nadie ileso!” She commanded her troops. The soldiers started firing harder than before, charging out onto the battlefield. There was gunfire from both sides and a few fistfights broke out. It felt like hours to Katalina. She took bullets to her limbs and her chest, none fatal but painful all the less. Finally the killing shot.

In what seemed like slow motion, Katalina heard the shot of the MG34 and before she could dodge for cover, the 7.92x57mm cartridge tore through her stomach. It ripped through her internal organs and sliced through her spine with ease, exiting her body through her back. She fell to the ground as the war raged around her. She heard the bodies of her soldiers falling to the ground and the Germans throw a grenade before retreating back to their base. The grenade exploded and Katalina was thrown fifty feet.

She laid there suffering for hours, unable to move most of her body save for her arms. Snow fell down and she was in total silence. Suddenly, the soft strumming of a guitar could be heard, as well as the sound of feet crunching through the snow. She looked up, trying to see who was there. A tall, skeletal woman with long black hair and white wings stood there. She wore a red and black dress and a red charro hat and carried a yellow guitar. Her red and black eyes looked down at the dying Colonel. She knelt down next to her.

“S-Sartana- Por favor- please-“ Katalina choked out, reaching for the goddess. Sartana took her hand and shushed her.

“I can heal you. Just sit tight.” She said, reaching into her hat for her spellbook.

“N-No- Sartana! D-Don’t do it... Please... I-I know you have th-the death touch. P-Please just... give it t-to me. L-Let me d-die.” She coughed up blood. Sartana looked at her painfully. “I-I failed P-Palli. I-I promised her I’d k-kill that nazi hijo de puta. I failed. She’ll never forgive me.” She clutched the fabric of Sartana’s dress.

“I didn’t used to like you. I thought you’d just hurt my sister. She’s been hurt enough in her life as it is. But now I see what she sees in you. A brave, strong soldier willing to die for her lover. At any other time I would have let you die, but now I can’t.” Sartana strummed her guitar. “Mi hermanita will be here any minute, and she’ll be pissed if I let anything happen to you.”

“Please... I’m suffering... If you kill me I’ll let you be my maid of honor...”

“Palli already promised me a position as a bridesmaid, but if this is really what you want, I have no choice but to help you.” She stopped strumming and her hand glowed black. “You fought well soldier.”

“W-Will it hurt?”

“No. It will be just like falling asleep.” The glow around Sartana’s hand faded. Katalina closed her eyes. Sartana gently touched her face, draining the life from the fallen soldier.

When Etapalli arrived at the battlefield, she found Katalina’s limp body. She let out such a scream that everyone within 20 miles heard her anguished cries and if they’d been in Mexico it would have been thought she was La Llorona herself. She cried and cradled her lover’s body in her arms, blood staining her clothes.

“Don’t be overdramatic. You can just go down to the land of the remembered and she’ll be there.” Sartana said from the tree where she stood.

“Y-You killed her... Why would you do it?! Why did you kill the love of my life?!” Etapalli stood up, angered.

“She begged me to. She was suffering, Palli. You knew she was going to die anyway. Humans are like ants. They can’t live as long as us.”

“You could have healed her!”

“She wouldn’t let me.” Etapalli fell to the ground in tears. Sartana went to her sister and held her tightly. “I’m sorry kiddo. I really am.” Etapalli hugged onto her sister as she sobbed.

The next day, early in the morning before the search party found the massacred soldiers, a tall young woman walked the battlefield. Her hair brown and green, she donned a green dress that seemed to be made of grass and moss and fields and mountains. She knelt next to the corpse of a teenage boy named Ferdinand Gonzalez and gently stroked his pale, cold cheek. The snow melted around his body and she pressed a kiss to his forehead. Red and white rose bloomed around his body from his bloodstains. A single red rose stemmed from his chest. “Be at peace, mi soldado.” La Vida whispered. “May beauty and peace come from your sacrifice.”

Hey im back on my bullshit with the second book of life fic in 24 hours. I’m sorry y’all. If you wanna unfollow you can. This one about the death of Katalina. These are the roses that bloomed from Nandito’s death. And yes I got that name from Maria la Del Barrio. I’m sorry for this. Adios.

[n7soldiered]

          IMPORTANT  HEADCANONS  TO  CONSIDER  !

CAN THEY USE CHOPSTICKS:    Yes, he can use chopsticks.   I like to believe John is good at everything he does.  A jack of all trades but a master of none, however.   And as someone who is deeply connected to their Chinese roots, and raised in a traditional Chinese household, it pains me to say that he just stabs everything with them.  If there are noodles involved, expect him to swallow from the bowl.  ( and no, it's not rude table manners.  that’s a common misconception.  in asia, if you slurp or eat from the bowl, it's a compliment to the cook.  dunno about aliens tho ).

WHAT DO THEY DO WHEN THEY CAN’T SLEEP:   I’ve been mulling over this for the past few days ( and im gonna go off tangent ), but I’m pretty sure I’ve repeated this enough times.  If he can’t sleep and there’s shit to be done, he’s probably working.  If there’s no work to be done, which is an odd concept in itself, John probably won’t know what to do with himself for a bit.  Because he’s a total square.  And because John suffers from severe PTSD.

He suffers night terrors, oftentimes, but mostly sleep paralysis and hallucinogenic nightmares.  His trauma stems from the events of his childhood to his apparent death, as well as post-reaper war etc.  His dreams mostly consist of suffocating while in the vacuum of space, stuck in his N7 armor with no air to breathe.  For that reason, he doesn’t prefer total darkness in his cabin, and he can't sleep without having on some light.  I’m also positive that his lover has woken him up in the middle of the night due to these issues.  Still trapped in his nightmares, John just stops breathing or he wakes up, shouting.

On the really bad nights, he'll quietly move his shit over to the crew bunks and sleep there.  But if he lies awake in bed for too long, he’ll get frustrated, I’m sure.  I can see him invading the mess for food, maybe even try cooking on his own.  In short, he does stuff he doesn’t normally get the chance to do.  Oh, and if there’s someone else awake, he’d chat them up because he can’t help himself.  John doesn’t like to be alone.

WHAT WOULD THEY IMPULSE BUY AT THE GROCERY STORE:   This is timeline dependent.  As a kid/young teen, he didn’t have the money to impulsively buy random shit in a store.  As for later on, when he is an adult and has more than enough credit chits to spare, John buys anything he thinks someone will like.  I.E:  new boots for Jane; new leather jacket for Ryan; a massive cake for Jyn;  new rifle for Garrus;  new amp for Kaidan;  new makeup kit for Jack;  the list goes on.  Forever.   It’s probably awful how much he spends but, then again, counting how much currency one can gain in-game, the man is sort of rich as fuck, so it works out?

WHAT ORDER DO THEY WASH THINGS IN THE SHOWER:    I HAVE DWELLED ON THIS QUESTION FOR TEN YEARS.    And it isn’t because I'm perverted, I swear.  It’s because I first have to wonder, what the fuck is on Shepard’s mind when he gets into the shower?  What is he thinking after a long, hard battle?  What’s going through his head, after he’s killed a score of over fifty men and women, human or otherwise?  Is there regret?  Has he any doubt in the choices made?  Was he injured, is he in pain?

Are his hands still shaking from adrenaline having seared through his veins, burned his nerve endings to slag?  Is he disjointed from reality, barely able to stand on his own, in his private quarters?  Has he bothered removing his armor, before getting under the spray?  Is he still covered in blood and guts, weighed down by dirt and dross?  Is he thinking about how he almost lost a squad mate, this time?  Does his mind leap to contingencies, questions;  what if he hadn’t been fast enough, would he have been able to handle the loss while all alone, in this moment of fleeting repose?

Does he wonder what if, one day, commander Shepard just isn’t enough?

I don’t think John really washes anything in order.  He gets under the shower, and he just — he just stands there.  For a while.  At least, until EDI warns him that he’s dipping into the emergency water reserves and that he can continue his shower once the Normandy goes through one recycle sequence.  In other words, he can continue his shower after waiting 30 minutes.  If John’s in a bad place—I’m talkin’ a really bad place, she shocks him with freezing cold water to get his attention.

John usually takes it without protest, save for tensing up or yelping out a half-bitten curse.  But he always thanks EDI.  Always.  And EDI always says you are welcome.

WHAT’S THEIR COFFEE ORDER:  Please, do not EVER give John watered down sugary seasonal frappe crap.  He will hate it.  John likes the taste of bold roasts.  Bit of sugar and cream.  He likes it sweet and bitter.

WHAT SORT OF APPS WOULD THEY HAVE ON THEIR SMARTPHONE:   I         I actually don’t know.  After thinking about this for a bit, I don’t think he’d have anything particularly interesting.  Weather app, news apps, forum/thread apps revolving around politics, world news, stock, and market.  I think John isn’t one to entertain himself with electronics when he could be doing pretty much anything else than staring at his omni-tool.  In a modern verse, it’s pretty much the same.  Perhaps, just slightly less boring?

His most interesting app would definitely be p!nterest or something—and I’m not saying that because I’ve been using it a lot lately lmao.  I think the visual stimulation is the only thing that could capture his attention.  Since I don’t exactly see him as a vain type, I doubt he’d like taking pictures of himself.  No Instagram account for himself or anything like that, but, he’d definitely have an Instagram account filled with pictures of his life, his lover, his family etc.  The contrast of pictures of his dog vs him is absolutely staggering.  Overall, he’s not huge on social media.  If you need to talk to him, find him yourself etc.

HOW DO THEY ACT AROUND CHILDREN:  Oh, lord.   John doesn’t …  okay, as of now, he doesn’t know how he feels about them.  Doesn’t know what to do around children.  I mean, he’ll do his best to console a crying child, and he’s held a toddler for pictures before, but that doesn’t really make him feel any better.  If you want me to get specific, he’s borderline terrified of babies.  How do you get them to stop crying?  How do you hold them without breaking them?  Just his one hand is larger than half the baby.  John won’t know what to do with himself.

That isn’t to say he doesn’t want kids.   Be it adoption, surrogate, lab-born, it doesn’t matter how; he wants a family one day, he really does.  It’s just ... when he thinks about babies—children—he gets terrified he somehow might hurt them.  And if he ever came to accidentally hurt his own child, I don’t think he would ever forgive himself.  Honestly?  If kids are around him, he’ll go stand in a corner and hope to god nothing blows up since things do have a tendency to suddenly explode around him.

WHAT WOULD THEY WATCH ON TV WHEN THEY’RE BORED & NOTHING THEY REALLY LIKE IS ON:    Once again, John just isn’t the type of person to waste time.  There’s too much for him to do.  He’d rather do anything else than suffer from ‘boredom’.

tagged by:  @kyberborne  thank you!! tagging:  @littleredrenegade @risenspectre

[larksinging]

and idk if i've asked this one before, but what are some good Comfort Lps that you enjoy watching?? or just any youtube videos in general

actually i rarely watch lps when im upset?? i think like. the kind of focus that lps require from me isnt the kind of focus i have/need when im upset or need something lowkey to listen to. i usually like to watch lps in the early afternoon/right after dinner when im like, chill and not too focused but just focused enough to watch something

instead i usually like to watch video essays ive already seen as a comfort thing! okay, well. for hardcore comfort, like “i am havin a meltdown” i usually listen to music. particularly the protomen. idk why thats just one of my Comfort Bands. i think it being familiar but also rock ballads is good for quick catharsis and a pivot in emotion

but anyway. my favorite video essayist ever is lindsay ellis (formerly... well shes trying to distance herself from it because of a lot of complicated history but its basically well known, she was the nostalgia chick). her stuff is mostly film analysis, though shes been moving towards more like. explaining some concepts big in media right now? like she did a video on death of the author recently. her series on the hobbit films is like, unironically a masterpeice, she basically went full documentary in the last couple talking about the history of the production. she also has a series about the bayformers movies through various literary critism lenses as a way to actually explain those frameworks which i think is really good if youre not as familiar with them. i also like her videos on bright, the hunchback of notre dame, and pirates of the carribean -- i rewatch those ones a lot. anyway yeah shes both really good at explaining film criticism applied to more popular media while being funny/relatable but also but also professional. sorry this sounds like a glowing review, i just love her work a lot and her stuff means a lot to me! 

in a similar vein i like folding ideas (dan olson). he’s also mainly film criticism, though focused a bit more on how film functions and very film-specific theories. like lindsay will explain marxist theory or the female gaze and how it applies to a disney movie, dan will explain editing and what the kuleshov effect is and why that means suicide squad’s editing is terrible. he has a series on fifty shades of grey and its adaptation thats good, but i also like his videos on book of henry and suicide squad. he doesnt make many video essays about it but he also likes games a lot! he streams really regularly. he actually was on the last GDQ?? he played this obscure surv horror game called amy which he just like, picked up and learned the speendrun as an experiment in a few months

and then i also really like hbomberguy. hes probably the most political one ill watch when im upset (i like contrapoints and other lefttube people but i dont rewatch their stuff when i need a pick me up). hes like 50% political 50% video games (i disagree with some of his opinons, but his video essays are so good that im like. alright harris. this time). hes kind of a big deal now because of that DK64 stream he did that fucking exploded. anyway i like sherlock is garbage and here’s why, some of his videos about brexit, and um... i need to rewatch his video about lovecraft bc i remember being really moved by it, i think its like the best message about how we can talk about lovecraft in this day and age

THOSE RECOMMENDATIONS ASIDE i just really like. produced video essays. ill also watch a lot of... like top 10 lists of whichever weird niche interest i have at the moment. like for a while i watched videos of top 10 lists or reviews of roller coasters?? right now i watch a lot of pokemon stuff. i dont usually have any recommendations because i watch whatever i do less for the quality and more for just whatever. except oh i really like defunctland for theme park (mainly disney) history. i find that stuff fascinating, and defunctland has the best production values. 

anyway thats probably enough but yes. i enjoy lps but when i need something calming i like video essays because theyre scripted and designed to flow more easily and that soothes me. but i like ones that are a little bit funny, or at least are about something im interested in but not too... heavy. 

the only lps i really have ever rewatched more than once are SBFP ones, surprise surprise. usually their david cage ones -- i find those lps are just, really high quality

[efosa123]

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[everyonesomething]

Session Seven

Edith Runekill: "Try not to get eaten by a Manticore, Mal." She winks.

Malkas: "Haha yes we are far enough from that to make jokes"

Edith Runekill maybe played it a little Too Cool.™

Edith Runekill: "Um, was my joke about the Manticore too much?"

Malkas: "A ... a little too soon."

In this session Mal and Edith fucking die.

The set-up: The next morning we leave Lizard Town and look for transport to head on to Waterdeep—a large city to the south where we might pick up more clues about the lich.

The Game: The gang convenes outside the Lizard Town hotel (The Litz) and decides the best course of action is to make their way to Waterdeep. The lich is heading south and it's the first largest city on the way. Edith and Pepper have a productive morning of avoiding each other as much as possible and we're on our way.

Pepper: "Hey, hey, are we getting on or posing for a painting. Grim's getting away."

Grim would be okay with that honestly

Edith Runekill stalks off alongside Malkas. "It's gonna be a long trip to Waterdeep."

Sydney Gaydos isn't sure how to defuse the situation that's brewing, so dutifully trails behind everyone. She'll surely need to brainstorm on the trip there. "Maybe... group building exercises... "

Pepper marches off "Iiiiiiiiiit's a long trip to Waterdeeeeeeeep, it's a long way to goooooo."

No troubles here!

At the next town, we decide to hop on a train to go the rest of the way to Waterdeep. It's more expensive in the short run, but there's probably less chance the group will eat itself in the process. Tickets are purchased, a quick lunch is had, and then we're onto the train and riding in style.

Sydney enjoys the novelty of a train ride, Pepper tries to keep her lunch in her stomach, and Grim busies herself etching the stock of her rifle. Edith regales Mal with tales of Plaguewrought Land's endless fields of corn, Mal returns the favor by going on about Waterdeep's meat-packing industry.

Edith Runekill: "See all that empty countryside out there, Mal?"

"The place I grew up was four times as empty."

Edith Runekill: "Corn for days."

Malkas: "I do like corn. We should get some corn, in Waterdeep."

Malkas: "Gen Yew Wine Waterdeep Corn! Smells like a slaughterhouse, tastes like a rendering plant."

Edith Runekill puts on her best attempt at a Waterdeep accent. "Well, time to bring in the sausage harvest from the sausage fields."

Edith Runekill , in her regular voice. "Well, I tried."

Malkas: "It-it was good, I liked it."

Malkas: "You really captured our sausage industry."

"Our Meat-Packing history."

Edith Runekill: "And here I thought moving to the big city meant being AWAY from slaughtering animals."

"The simple pleasure of eating a hamburger without having known the cow first."

Malkas: "Oh no, we boil 'em down right in the street, so all the kids can come around and smell."

The conversation doesn't do much to help Pepper and Mal goes to find her something to settle her stomach.

Mal is such a good boy.

A few minutes later, everyone notices the train is slowing down. Concerned, Edith gets up to investigate when a train employee runs into our car: she tells us something's kicked in the door to the dining car and everyone is in a panic. The gang realizes Mal was up there so off we go to find him: it's easy enough, he's hard to miss under the giant manticore sitting on top of him.

After a bit of shooting and magic, we knock it off and Millicent fixes Mal up. Pepper then explodes it with lightning. It's a good day.

Malkas sits up, "... got your toast, pep"

Pepper: "You could probably use it more than me."

Malkas pulls his gun out with a shaking hand, "im fine"

Pepper: to the exploded husk of a manticore. "That's for ruining my toast."

Grim looks inappropriately happy about this

Sydney Gaydos is covered in goo n gore. Lovely.

Oh and then another manticore shows up and starts eating Grim's face. Whatever. We kill that one in a less-exploding manner and the day is saved! Except for the engineer that got mauled to death but well, can't win 'em all.

Still, the death and destruction isn't enough to distract Edith for long from what's really on her mind: would Mal be happier with another tiefling? She and Mal go outside the car for a serious and private discussion.

Except the window to our car's open and we hear everything. Oops.

Pepper preemptively clamps a hand on Syd's mouth to keep her quiet.

Malkas: "You're way better looking, though. By miles."

Edith Runekill: "It just got under my skin, even though I knew you weren't taking the bait."

Grim is legitimately not listening

Sydney Gaydos makes a few muffled noises.

Everything.

Edith Runekill: "Go on, say it. We're alone right now."

Pepper slaps her other hand over Syd's mouth.

Malkas gets a little PG13+

Grim flicks her cigarette end out of the window absently

Malkas gets a little blue.

Edith Runekill: "Oh, Mal. Always such a gentleman."

Malkas: "Gentle, huh?"

Edith Runekill gets a little PG13+too. But not in an audible way.

Edith Runekill: "More where that came from later. Let's head back in, though."

Malkas: "Too bad we can't get a private car."

Sydney Gaydos internally screams.

Malkas kind of readjusts his clothes. Its fine.

Edith Runekill buttons her blouse again.

Everything.

Malkas looks at Pepper and Sydney.

Pepper realizes she still has her hands on Syd's face and not-so-smoothly pulls them away.

Sydney Gaydos don't be suspicious... don't be suspicious...

Pepper slugs Syd's shoulder. "Well! Hiccups all gone, then?"

Sydney Gaydos really forced laugh. "Yes! Gaydos thanks you for the help! Ahaha!"

Pepper: "Glad I took that week course at the annex on dragonborn medicine."

Sydney Gaydos: "It surely came in hands! Er, er not handsy, helpful! Helpful!"

Edith Runekill swivels her head around.

Edith Runekill looks at Pepper and Sydney.

Edith Runekill looks at Grim.

Malkas sinks into the armchair and grabs another sandwich.

Edith Runekill looks at the window Grim opened.

Edith Runekill: "Oh," Edith says.

Edith Runekill crosses the aisle back to Mal's side. "Well, they heard everything and I'm going to sleep for the next fifty years. Good night."

Grim looks up and closes the window.

Grim is completely fucking oblivious

Good night indeed.