#MY ATTEMPT AT ANGST ✨✨
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SLACKING OFF.
pairing: jeon wonwoo x f!reader
genre: smut, angst, fluff, coworkers to lovers, friends to lovers
summary: being technologically averse, yet a complete control freak to your core, you tend to annoy senior IT specialist, jeon wonwoo, to no end. but after an apology brings you two closer together, wonwoo finds himself reaching out to you more often than not. on and off slack. despite what you two had originally perceived, you find yourself thrown into feelings that neither of you could've ever prepared for.
warnings: handjobs, fingering, oral (f!recieving), unprotected sex, missionary position, belly bulge, grinding, praise, wonwoo is a service top!!, multiple sex scenes, jerking it in an corporate office bathroom lol, drunk horniness, miscommunication, reader is learning how to open up<3, mutual pining. nsfw (minors / ageless blogs dni).
word count: 19.2k
note: hello new ppl, welcome to the first goldenhourology one shot ✨ I've written things in the past, but this is my first really long one shot. the longer it got, the more I stressed out lol. but I've seen a lot of people do this 20k word one shots, so I thought I'd try my hand at it! also idk much about tech, so if I got anything wrong in this, pls ignore it. thank you to anyone who gives this a read!!
in rotation: picture you, chappell roan / dress, taylor swift / valentine, laufey / diamond boy, sza
Some said your late 20s were the last few years of fun before you fully allowed yourself to be an adult, so why were you always drowning in work?
It didn’t help that you were an executive assistant in one of the biggest software companies in the U.S. When you took the job, surely, you should’ve known that you’d be signing up for an exorbitant amount of work, ranging from invoice management, planning travel for your boss, to even research for senior managers. Despite the constant stress you were under, you liked this job. You liked the trust that your boss had in you. You liked that they let you be independent and figure things out on your own.
And when you couldn’t … you simply contacted IT.
It helped that a senior IT specialist sat right across from your cubicle.
Jeon Wonwoo wasn’t the most talkative cubicle buddy, nor was he the most pleasant. He did his best to give you a smile every once in a while, but he had to fight the urge to throw his head in his hands whenever you send him a message on Slack. You didn’t typically need help with anything, except in the area of tech. You were so organized and incredibly smart – it didn’t take an idiot to see that – but god forbid, sometimes … you could be so technologically averse.
Maybe he just had too many years of schooling under his belt – he was 28 now with both a Bachelors and Masters in Software Engineering – but you surprised him with some of your requests. Sometimes, you’d delete files by accident, need to renew your subscription to important apps, even locked yourself out of your own computer once. He had interns underneath him that could be available to help you, but you had consistently messaged him. And he sat directly across from you. No matter what, it was always going to be Wonwoo that had to help you. Fate had made sure of that.
There were times that you realized you were bothering him. Either you heard him curse from behind his extremely large monitor or he adjusted his glasses so much that you thought he might break them in half. And to be honest, you liked being in control of your own work, so you’d try to find a solution. Typically, solving your own tech problems left your computer in more disarray.
And there was Wonwoo to save the day yet again.
You [10:58 AM]: Morning, Wonwoo!
You [10:58 AM]: I screwed up
You [10:59 AM]: Boss sent me some documents that were password protected, but he’s away for the next two days and not answering his phone
You [10:59 AM]: So I might’ve downloaded some software to help me unlock it and I think it’s attempting to hack my email as we speak
You [11:01 AM]: I’m so so sorry! I didn’t want to bother you
Jeon Wonwoo [11:01 AM]: I’ll be right over.
Luckily for you, Wonwoo was able to fix the problem and stop your email from getting hacked. Whoever was the owner of that virus-filled program you tried to download didn’t gain access to those password-protected documents before Wonwoo secured your computer. But it was close. Too close.
Not only that, but he had a multitude of other projects today. He had to train two new interns … have one of those annual performance reviews with the head of IT … change over a dozen new passwords for people … and then he found out that they’re changing servers. Which meant everything backed up on their former server had to be transferred over to the new one. Fucking great.
He wasn’t sure how many times he sighed today, but it had to be over a hundred. When he couldn’t stand to be sitting anymore, he stood up and paced around the third floor of the building. Today felt like the longest day of his life. And there was a mustard stain on his green sweater vest. And he got a shitty haircut a few days ago. And he probably needed new glasses because he was getting headaches.
It was time for a coffee. As well as a day off.
Coincidentally, you were also headed to the break room that afternoon in need of a green tea. You were about to walk in when you heard your cubicle mate letting out a frustrated breath while talking to another IT specialist. He was clearly fed up about something, or maybe just tired of this day. You hid next to the doorframe, and just when you thought it was safe to step out, you heard your name fall from his lips.
“I don’t understand how she does it,” Wonwoo complained, hands smacking against his sides. “Seriously, it’s mind boggling. I’m pretty sure she has her Masters in Business Administration, but she does this shit that just makes me … Oh my god, she literally tried to download some faulty software off the internet today, instead of just asking me or someone else for help.”
“Oh, yeah, everyone wants to turn to you when you got that attitude, man,” someone – Lee Seokmin, maybe? – joked.
“You get what a mean.” Wonwoo watched the first couple drips of shitty office coffee fill his cup. “I was able to save her computer, yeah, but it would be nice to avoid an emergency for a day.”
Seokmin slapped him on the back. “The joys of working in IT.”
You huffed, stalking away from the break room and back to your desk. There was only so much office gossip you could take, especially when it involved you. As soon as you sat down, you finished typing up an email at the loudest volume possible, your fingers basically punching themselves into the keys. You heard Wonwoo slide back into his desk chair, the fresh smell of burnt coffee wafting across to you, and he didn’t say a thing. Not that he would ever know you had eavesdropped. But not a “hello” or “how has computer been after this morning?” He went back to work, burning his tongue on the overly hot liquid.
Maybe Wonwoo was right; maybe you did need to just stop overthinking and ask for help instead of figuring stuff out on your own. Or maybe this asshole needed an attitude check.
You decided to not bother him for the rest of the week, complaining to your friends that Friday night about your shithead of a coworker. They said he might be looking out for you in his own fucked up way. You said he might just be an asshole.
Come Monday morning, you had realized your ignoring hadn’t effected him at all. He still sent you the same small smile as he walked in and sat down across from you. Could he really not see how pissed you are, or had the facade you’d crafted for so long as the perfect corporate employee work too well?
You should just be upfront with him, take control of the situation. Like always.
You [9:44 AM]: I heard you in the break room a few days ago.
You [9:44 AM]: I just didn’t want to bother you. That’s why I had tried to figure out the issue on my own. Didn’t realize that was a crime
Jeon Wonwoo [9:46 AM]: Crap.
Jeon Wonwoo [9:46 AM]: You weren’t supposed to hear that.
You [9:47 AM]: Well, I did
Jeon Wonwoo [9:50 AM]: Listen.
Jeon Wonwoo [9:50 AM]: Not that it excuses anything, but there’s so much going on at work. It wasn’t all about you. I was complaining just to complain and I didn’t mean any of it.
Jeon Wonwoo [9:50 AM]: I’m sorry.
You [9:51 AM]: Wow
Jeon Wonwoo [9:51 AM]: What?
You [9:51 AM]: You’ve never come across as someone who can apologize well
Jeon Wonwoo [9:52 AM]: Are you sure you aren’t projecting right now? We sit across from each other. I’ve seen how stubborn you are.
You [9:53 AM]: I thought you were apologizing to me????
Jeon Wonwoo [9:56 AM]: I’m sorry. Again.
You [10:01 AM]: Okay, you’re forgiven
Jeon Wonwoo [10:09 AM]: Can I make it up to you with a coffee?
You didn’t go out on dates. The last one you went on was … years ago, probably in undergrad. Once you go for your Masters, all energy to date goes out the window.
Not that this was a date. This certainly was not a date.
This was an apology coffee after work, since the two of you seemed to have an affinity for caffeine at late hours.
Even if, per chance, he thought this was a date … you’d eventually have to let him down easy. It probably wasn’t in your best interest to date someone like Jeon Wonwoo, but you’d also closed yourself off from love for far too long. It wasn’t that you didn’t get lonely – you did, very much, especially on late nights where it was just you and your favorite vibrator – but it was just … scary. Opening yourself up. Losing just a small semblance of control. You weren’t even sure you could physically allow yourself to do that after being alone for so long.
Your heart had been tucked away so many years ago, locked inside a box, and then in another box, and so on. With the final lock being so complicated that only someone who knew the last four of your social security number could answer. No one was opening up that box. Your heart was safe from the outside world.
You were independent, reliant on only yourself, and you liked it that way.
Once he had gotten both your coffees, he sat down next to you at a hightop table, folding his winter coat over the back of his chair. He had managed to remember your latte order and it tasted perfect. Your eyes flitted up, ogling him for a moment. When you’re not under the fluorescent lights of the office, Wonwoo was … attractive. To say the least. Maybe he always had been and you were too blind to see it. Maybe his face was perpetually hidden by his monitor.
His hair was tousled in the way that it looked effortless, even if he hadn’t brushed it after rolling out of bed. He had a tendency to wear sweater vests with white t-shirts underneath, or button-downs with jeans. But it was only when he showed off his forearms that you realized he was surprisingly built underneath his oversized clothes. He was tall and his shoulders were broad. You liked his glasses too; they always sat on the edge of his nose. A thin line was etched into both lenses, suggesting age, but they framed his face well.
Yeah, you thought to yourself, he is handsome.
“Why are you staring at me?” He asked, knocking you out of your stupor.
You blinked and looked down at your coffee, removing the lid. “Oh, I … uh … good question.”
“Listen,” he started, eyes flickering to his hands, “I’m really sorry about what I said –”
“You don’t have to keep apologizing.”
“– And I understand if you want to go to HR about this –”
You shook your head. “Wait, what? Why would I do that?”
He glanced around, until finally, his eyes were on you again. And suddenly, you were wondering if his eyes were dark brown or the color of cinnamon. “Isn’t that what any rational person would do?”
He had you stumped there. If this were a different situation … you probably would do that. “I’m not going to tell HR about this, Wonwoo. You apologized and said you didn’t mean it. I have to trust that.” And you didn’t trust lightly – hardly at all – but something about Wonwoo made you feel like it could be easy with him.
“We all have shit days,” you added, taking a sip of the scalding hot latte. “You have a ton of stuff on your plate. Doesn’t give you an excuse for what you did, but we all say things in the heat of the moment that we don’t mean. I have so many things to organize throughout the day, and sometimes it gets the better of me. Remember when I had book that last minute trip for our CEO and I was on the phone for hours with Delta and Suzanne in finance had the nerve to start bothering me about some invoice? I lost it on her for a straight minute.”
“Oh, my god, yeah,” he chuckled, pinching the bridge of his nose as the memory resurfaced. “Her eyes almost came out of her skull at your reaction. To be fair … Suzanne needs to be knocked down a peg sometimes. She always blames IT when she can’t get into her email, but it’s because she’s constantly typing her password with one letter off.”
You couldn’t help but giggle. Your hand hit the tabletop a few times as you let your workplace personality fade in front of your coworker. “Those new IT interns don’t know what’s coming once Suzanne comes for them,” you joked.
“The IT interns don’t know anything. Period.” He jabbed his finger onto the table. “I mean, they’re interns, but it takes so much time to train them. If I have to teach them JavaScript one more time …”
“Say it, Jeon Wonwoo,” you egged him on, a chuckle filtering at the end. “What will happen if you have to teach those good for nothing interns JavaScript?”
A slow smile made it’s way onto Wonwoo’s face, and … damn, you were actually a really cool person. “Well,” he cleared his throat, “I’ll tell you what will happen …”
Jeon Wonwoo [12:13 PM]: Did you bring lunch today?
Jeon Wonwoo [12:13 PM]: I just found this new cafe down the street and was thinking about grabbing something there in a few. Did you wanna come?
You [12:14 PM]: Do you think they have a chicken salad sandwich on the menu
Jeon Wonwoo [12:15 PM]: I can only assume so?
You [12:15 PM]: SOLD
You both go out for more coffees, before and after work. You found yourself excited to wake up early, to meet up with Wonwoo at the coffee shop located in the lobby of your work building. Always getting there before him, you typically ordered two coffees – remembering his order to a T – and when he walked in five minutes late, he promised to buy the next round. You never let him.
You began planning lunches over Slack, discussing what was on special at that cafe he found last month. In fact, you two talked most of the day on Slack. A message from you had once gotten on his nerves, and now … he was eager for it. Eager to hear your thoughts throughout the day, excited to talk about what new dumb question an intern asked him today or to see more pictures of your grandma’s cats.
And Wonwoo … Wonwoo was easier to get along with than you thought. You just had to peel back the layers before he finally got comfortable, and honestly, you could relate. To be fair, you had a few more layers than he did, but he was slowly learning that you were more than what he perceived. After that first coffee, he realized how funny you were, and then a couple lunches later, he learned you were an avid romance and thriller reader – and nothing in between. It wasn’t until last week that he finally cracked you open enough to learn about your love for Elder Scrolls Online. He was sure you were joking at first, but when you clarified how serious you were, he almost fell off his chair.
“I’m not shocked that you play it,” he said over coffee one morning. “What I’m shocked at is that you’d rather play Elder Scrolls Online and not Skyrim.”
“Of course, you would say that,” you replied, rolling your eyes. “I don’t really have an interest in the game universe. I started playing Elder Scrolls Online to relieve stress while applying to colleges, and then I just … didn’t stop.” You shrugged.
Much to his own surprise – even with your take on Skyrim – Wonwoo thoroughly enjoyed your company. It was insane that you both had spent almost two years sitting across from each other before realizing how much you liked each other. Words always left unsaid. Eyes staying glued to computers. It had been a routine for you both that you had never strayed from – until now. So many tech requests over Slack … and now he was actively looking forward to work everyday. To seeing you. To talking with you.
You.
Jeon Wonwoo realized how much he liked stockings. Specifically, he liked the way you looked in them.
And that’s when things got dangerous.
He started to notice the days you would wear them, and then concluded which day you did laundry. You liked wearing blouses with a pencil skirt and stockings on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays. Those were now his favorite days.
Wednesdays you’d wear dress pants and maybe a sweater, whereas on “Casual Fridays,” you were clad in a t-shirt with a cardigan layered and jeans. You always looked nice at the office, but those stocking days … they were getting to him.
Sometimes, he’d watch the way you walked away from your desk – either to the Boss’ office or to the finance department – and he couldn’t help but let his eyes trail down your legs. You had these stockings that had a slight tear in the back, and he wondered if you realized, or was he just too much of a perverted loser to be the first person to notice? He wanted to purchase a new pair for you. He wanted to replace all your stockings and buy you enough that you could wear them with a skirt everyday, just so he could see you in them.
Maybe he was a loser.
You looked up at him, even in heels, and you had this way of smiling at him that left him questioning why you liked hanging out with him in the first place. His personality couldn’t be that charming to warrant your attention. But you were warm – even when your hands were perpetually cold – and kind, never straying once he was in front of you. And you had this lip gloss that stained your lips magenta and made them shine. Even in the dim fluorescent lights. When his chair turned just slightly and he let his eyes glaze over you, one finger rubbing at his top lip, he couldn’t help but be curious if the gloss had a flavor to it … and then, he’d get distracted by your legs again. And your blouse, and your hair.
Don’t even get him started on the way you smelled.
Maybe he was a loser. No, he was most definitely a loser.
It was a Thursday night. Almost 7 PM and you were still at the office. You had plans to go out tonight to celebrate your friend’s new job, but you ended up having to cancel when the Boss placed a stack of paperwork on your desk before leaving the building at promptly 6 o’clock. Why he couldn’t have given you all these invoices and memos hours ago was beyond you, but you weren’t even halfway through this stack and the janitor was now mopping beside you.
When a Slack notification appeared on the side of your monitor, you didn’t even read it before spinning around in your chair. There Wonwoo was, leaning back in his own chair while a progress window ticked on one of his dual monitors. You raised a brow. “I didn’t even hear you over there,” you commented. “Why are you still here?”
“A month or so ago, the IT head told me that we’d soon be transitioning servers, so all of our backups and data need to be transferred over to this new server.” He explained, adjusting his glasses and glancing over at the progress window. It changed from 23% to 24% finished. “Someone had to be the lucky person to stay after hours and make sure it all went smoothly.”
You twirled a pen in your two fingers and crossed your legs. “Oh, that sucks.” Your skirt hiked up a little, and just that small flash of exposed skin had Wonwoo averting his eyes.
“Yeah,” he said, clearing his throat. “I’m assuming you’re still here because of that.” He nodded towards the pile of paper.
“No, no, obviously I love being here after hours with you,” you replied, sarcasm dripping from your tone, but it still ignited a short spark of hope within him. (Wonwoo, can you chill the fuck out? He chastised.) “You know the Boss has a penchant for letting invoices pile up. He just so happened to let that pile end up on my desk before he left today. And some of these needed to be filled out …” Your eyes skimmed the first paper on your desk. “Oh, yesterday!”
Wonwoo offered to help you while also keeping watch of his computer – 28% finished – but you insisted you could handle it. “I already bother you enough during work hours,” you said before turning back to your desk. He knew by now that you were simply too stubborn to give up control of the project. Once you had started it yourself, you needed to see it through. He wasn’t sure if you two were close enough that he could be completely honest, that he could tell you that it was fine to let go this independence that you kept on a tight leash. He was willing to help. (God, was he willing.)
But he chocked it up to telling you once that you were “so fucking stubborn.”
Your reply had come in the form of a swift kick to his knee.
Wonwoo glanced at his monitor. 67% finished.
It was 10 PM and you were just about finished with the paperwork, but you were running on fumes. Just a few memos left and you’d be done. To get you through the next hour, you needed something. So you headed to the break room, suddenly craving some burnt workplace coffee. (What was it about this coffee maker that gave it such a distinct burnt flavor? You’d never know.) After placing the pod of coffee grounds in the slot and filling the water, you pressed the start button, turning around with a huff to see Wonwoo striding into the break room. A crushed, styrofoam coffee cup was clutched in his large hand before he tossed it in the barrel beside you.
“How’s your transfer going?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest. Coffee had started to pour from the machine and into your cup.
He rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s at 88% now. Hopefully should be done in the next hour.”
“Me too, if all goes well.” A sigh escaped your lips. “I still have a few more papers to fill out. Shouldn’t take me more than an hour, but I haven’t looked through them all yet.”
Wonwoo stepped forward, reaching in the direction of the styrofoam cups. “If you had let me help you –”
You tried sidestepping out of the way to give him some room, but his hand brushed against your arm anyway. Your chin tilted up as your eyes met his, back pressing against the counter. “It wouldn’t have helped,” you finished for him.
His arm paused mid-air, and he looked down at you. Eyes narrowing, he replied, “You’re one of the most stubborn people I’ve ever met. You have this desperate need to be in control of everything.”
“And why is that a bad thing?” Your tone took a hard edge. The last thing you wanted right now was to put effort into arguing, but you were tired and already on the edge of a breakdown. “I’ve relied on myself for as long as I can remember. I like being in control. I like being stubborn. If I didn’t do most things myself –”
“You ask me to fix something on your computer at least once a day.”
“That’s different.”
“You’re right,” he agreed, and you noticed then just how close he was. Your chests were practically touching. “Sometimes you do try to figure things out yourself and almost break your hard drive.”
His progress window was probably at 93% finished now. He should head back to his desk, but his feet stayed planted right where they were.
“Why does it matter?” You exhaled loud, your hands slapping against your hips. “Do you want an award or something? You have your way of doing things, and I have mine. I’m not perfect, but I … I like things the way they are.” Change is scary, you thought to yourself, but didn’t dare voice it out loud.
He was so close that he could smell your perfume. The scent of lavender mixed with orange blossoms and vanilla filled his nostrils, swirling around his brain. He could get addicted to this smell, to you. Maybe he already was. When his eyes roamed down to your legs and he saw his favorite pair of stockings on you, he damn near collapsed. In fact, he hadn’t even realized the soft groan had left his lips until your gaze found his, your pretty irises growing wide.
You were just so … captivating.
His hands were on both sides of you, pressing your back further into the counter. Your black coffee steaming and fully abandoned in the coffee machine. He was holding himself back, his knuckles going white with restraint. But he wasn’t like you. He could only keep himself in control for so long. And with you here right now, your perfume surrounding him, your stockings-clad thigh brushing against his leg, your a hand placed on his chest … he was a goner.
“Wonwoo,” you whispered, palm still resting on his shirt, “we …”
When your voice trailed off, Wonwoo’s instincts got the better of him. “Please, just …” One hand came up to smooth against your cheek, and he was almost out of breath as he pulled your face to his. “Let me do this.”
He gave you enough time to shove him back, to yell at him, to tell him you didn’t like him in that way. But your neck was craning towards his, and he took that as a sign to crash his lips onto yours. They were softer than he expected, and the taste … your gloss tasted like – well, like nothing. But if he pretended, he could’ve sworn there was a slight cherry aftertaste. His glasses bumped into your nose, but he’d been too overwhelmed to remember to take them off. Mouth moving against yours, his hips crammed you more against the counter, hard enough to leave a bruise on your spine. You didn’t care though. His shoulders were so wide that they shielded you, inviting your body into his, and your fingers fisted into his button-up. Tongues tangled, eager to taste more and more of each other.
Wonwoo could kiss you forever. You didn’t want him to stop.
But all good things must end. Because when he instinctively placed his leg between yours, he knew this was going too far. Especially because you two were still at work. In the break room.
He instantly removed his leg, his lips breaking from yours. Your eyes connected, the room filled with only the sounds of heavy breathing, before you wiped a trail of spit from your chin.
Wonwoo’s head spun behind him. Thank god, there was no CCTV camera by the coffee maker.
Jeon Wonwoo [9:09 AM]: Good morning.
Jeon Wonwoo [9:09 AM]: I shouldn’t have done that last night.
Jeon Wonwoo [9:10 AM]: Still friends?
You [9:14 AM]: We probably shouldn’t be talking about this on Slack
You [9:15 AM]: Here’s my number: 855-777-0821
You [9:18 AM]: But yes friends :D
Wonwoo did not want to be just friends. But he was utterly terrified of what you would say if he voiced that. You had kissed him back, yes, but … hadn’t you agreed to be friends far too quickly? You had both hung out post-kiss – he liked to call this period of time A.T.K. (after the kiss) – and you didn’t seem to be ruminating on it like he was. Of course, he didn’t know what you were thinking, and you could be so hard to read sometimes when your layers weren’t stripped back enough. But …
Could it really have meant nothing to you?
If that were the case, he didn’t know how it was possible for you. He couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss even if he tried. When he saw you the next day – Friday, January 9, A.T.K. – the first thing he noticed was your lip gloss and all he wanted was to have it smeared over his mouth again. He noticed the way your hair fell over your shoulder, remembering how soft the strands felt when his fingers had slipped between them. He noticed that you were wearing those jeans that hugged your ass just right, and – god, now he was wishing that he had touched more than just your cheek. Wonwoo wanted to touch you everywhere. And vice versa. He didn’t care if your hands were constantly freezing or if they were dry during the winter. He wanted you to touch him however you pleased. He wanted to grab you and kiss you and hold those cold hands in his warm ones –
Oh, my god. He had a boner. At work. Just the mere memory of a kiss had him shifting himself in his pants underneath his desk, hoping no one noticed.
Eventually, he stood up, trying to keep a casual hand over the bulge in his pants as he fast walked to the bathroom. Nobody batted an eye, but you did steal a glance over at him once his back was turned. Your brow raised at the way he was practically sprinting for the elevator, not realizing that he was heading for the second floor restrooms. He must be excited for something. Probably a package, you thought before turning back to your computer.
Wonwoo felt like he could finally breathe once he was inside a stall. He rested his head against the cool tile wall, feeling the ache start to settle in his groin. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt this way. What 28-year-old gets a boner from a kiss? You had him acting like a goddamn teenager.
What had you done to him? Just one kiss and he was completely under your spell.
(Or maybe he’d been this way all along.)
His fingers fumbled with the zipper on his jeans as he finally pulled himself out of his jeans, stroking from base to tip. Thankfully, no one was in the bathroom. He couldn’t believe his life had come to this. The last thing he ever wanted was to be that guy who jacked off in the bathroom. But you had to wear those goddamn jeans –
Wonwoo wasn’t good at hiding his feelings, but he was doing a pretty good job even as this was killing him inside. He wasn’t like you; he found it hard to restrain himself, to ignore everything that was bubbling up inside him. He could feel himself cracking. What would be the thing that finally broke him?
The answer was simple: alcohol.
Lee Seokmin [11:26 AM]: Dude lol. Why’d you run away from your desk like that
Lee Seokmin [11:26 AM]: I think you could win the Olympics with that kind of sprint!
Jeon Wonwoo [11:39 AM]: Don’t ask.
Lee Seokmin [11:40 AM]: Alrighty then ;)
Lee Seokmin [11:41 AM]: On another note … you free next Thursday? My buddy in the marketing department, Josh, finally has a night off from his kid so we were thinking of getting a group together for drinks after work. Interested?
The last thing you ever expected was to be invited to drinks with Seokmin and some of the managers in marketing, but Wonwoo said you should come. “In fact,” he had clarified, “you should come so I don’t have to deal with DK’s drunk antics all night.” Who were you to deprive him of your presence when he was that desperate? Plus, there was a nice girl in marketing that was also invited; maybe tonight was the night to befriend her.
But the marketing people knew how to party. You were only halfway through your second beer whereas the rest of your group was on their fourth. And three tequila shots deep. Wonwoo, seemingly, had an affinity for tequila, unlike yourself. He was able to throw them back like it was nothing; he didn’t even need a chaser. When Seokmin had requested they all get a fourth, he was met with a round of cheers, and even Wonwoo – quiet, introverted Wonwoo – threw his hands up with excitement. You placed a hand on his shoulder, whispering in his ear, “Are you sure about that?”
Wonwoo felt his whole body freeze when your hot breath reached his ear. A pale, pink flush appeared on his cheeks, but you chocked it up to how drunk he was. Eventually, he waved away your worry with his hand. “I’m fiiiiiiiiine. Hey, how about I get you another beer?”
“Are you even coherent enough to get me another –”
“HEY! Bartender! Can I get one more of these?!” He shouted, waving your empty glass in the air. “Oh, and more tequila!”
Seokmin slapped a hand on his friend’s shoulder, laughing along with him. As you made friends with the rest of the marketing department, you found yourself glancing at Wonwoo every so often. His cheeks were so rosy now, and his glasses kept slipping down his nose. To be fair though, everyone in this dive bar seemed to be in the same state of mind. Seokmin was singing along to the Sabrina Carpenter song blasting through the speakers. Josh was so drunk that he was crying about how much he loved his friends. They had even gotten Suzanne in finance to come out, and she was making friends with everyone for once. And Wonwoo … oh, god, Wonwoo’s head was now on the bar top and he was closing his eyes –
You abandoned your beer and walked over to your friend, shaking his shoulders. His eyes instantly opened, expecting to see Seokmin, but when his gaze met yours, he instantly felt all warm and fuzzy. “Okay,” you said, trying your best to hoist this 6 foot man off the barstool, “you’ve had enough. I’m taking you home.”
It was like pulling teeth to get him to tell you his address, but you guessed you shouldn’t be surprised when the man on your arm was blackout drunk. After flagging a taxi, you shoved him in the seat next to you and rubbed your hands together to get them warm. Wonwoo’s head was on your shoulder the second you sat down, his eyes fluttering closed as the taxi sped off into the night. You watched his fingers twitch on his thigh as he whispered sleepily, “I think my family would really like you.”
“Is that so?” You chuckled, squeezing his arm for reassurance, but little did you know just how much your touch effected him. “Why’s that?”
“Because you’re you,” he replied, and then yawned. “Only you and Mingyu would do this for me.”
Your brow furrowed. “Who’s Mingyu?”
The taxi pulled up to a brick apartment building then, and your cold fingers struggled to get cash out from your pocket while Wonwoo was practically laying on top of you. Finally, you did your best to haul him out of the seat, thanking the taxi driver before gathering an arm around Wonwoo’s shoulders. The building was definitely old with vines of ivy crawling up one side. There was a dead tree with snow covering it’s branches directly by the door, spilling snowflakes on your head as you struggled to input the code Wonwoo managed to remember. And then, you were pulling him up two flights of stairs, which took far longer than you estimated. You had basically ripped his keys from his hand once you reached his apartment and continued to drag him inside, laying him on the old couch that was conveniently right near the door.
Wonwoo grumbled as soon as his head hit the armrest, and he almost fell off the couch if it weren’t for you catching him and rolling him back onto the cushion. “I’m going to go get you a glass of water,” you said, quickly rushing off to his kitchen. “Please, for the love of god, don’t fall off the couch again.”
He whined for you to come back, but you pretended you didn’t hear it, because if you did, you’d have to reckon with the tingle that bloomed between your legs at the sound of his desperation.
The entrance of his kitchen was right in front of a small hallway that sectioned off two ways. There was a bedroom door on each side of the hall, and once you walked inside the kitchen, you found a tiny table from the 80s and the dishwasher currently running. You didn’t have time to contemplate that now, and instead pilfered through his cabinets until you found a glass and filled it with tap water. Rushing back to his side, Wonwoo was already laying halfway off the couch and you sighed.
You set the glass of water on his coffee table and lifted him back up. With a little bit of help from you, you both managed to shrug off his winter jacket and you tucked a throw blanket over him to prevent him from falling off again. A heavy exhale slipped past your lips as you knelt by his side, and you couldn’t help but reach out to pushed back his hair from his forehead. His eyes were closed, but you knew he wasn’t sleeping. You smiled to yourself.
Were coworkers supposed to show this much affection for each other?
“Wonwoo,” you said softly, and he cracked one eye open. “Do you want some water?”
He shut that eye again, grimacing at the thought of anything entering his body right now. “Ab…absolutely not.”
“It’ll make you feel better,” you persuaded, but he still shook his head. “Okay, so what do you want right now?”
His breath stilled for a moment. “Can I be honest?”
“That’s never stopped you before.”
“I …” No, he couldn’t be that honest. “I want you to … keep p–pushing back my hair. It’s … relaxing.”
You chuckled, “Okay, you got it.” Your fingers were at the crown of his head again, smoothing back the strands. You hadn’t noticed until now that he had a freckle on the left side of his forehead; maybe you’d just never been this close to notice. Well, actually, you had. There was this thing you two did called a kiss –
“If you’re going to fall asleep, I’m going to take off your glasses,” you informed him, slipping his glasses off and setting them by his glass of water. It was late, much later than you anticipated on staying out, and you both still had to go to work tomorrow.
But then his hand was grabbing your wrist, his grip surprisingly firm for how intoxicated he was. “Can I b–be honest again?” He slurred, his eyes half open to meet yours.
You sighed, placing your hand on top of his, thumb brushing over his knuckles. “Just know whatever you say will be used to make fun of you tomorrow –”
“I can’t … I haven’t …” He took a breath to formulate the words in his head. “… Stopped thinking about our kiss.”
You blinked down at him, watching the way his eyes began to close again as he relaxed into the old couch cushions. “You can’t just say shit like –”
He scoffed dramatically. “I’m noooot,” he defended, his hand slipping off your wrist to curl underneath the blanket.
“Wonwoo …” Your voice trailed off, the words dying on your tongue.
“Who the hell are you?”
You immediately got to your feet at the sound of another person’s voice behind you. Eyes growing wide, you took in the sight of the man in front of you wearing nothing but a towel around his waist, droplets of water trailing down his chiseled abdomen as he shook a smaller towel through his hair. He might’ve been taller than Wonwoo, only by a little bit, and his skin was a golden tan that reminded you of summertime even in this harsh winter. Why was Wonwoo hiding handsome men in his apartment? The man looked at you, waiting for an answer, his brows raised.
“Oh,” you cleared your throat. “Um …”
“Leave her alone, Mingyu,” Wonwoo groaned from the couch, turning away from them to lay on his side.
So this was Mingyu, you concluded. This slightly god-like dude that looked like he walked straight out of a porno was the only other person who’d help Wonwoo when he was blackout drunk. Interesting.
Mingyu raised his hand awkwardly for you to shake. “His roommate,” he clarified.
“Oh,” you replied, grasping his hand for a moment and telling him your name.
Mingyu instantly grinned, laying the small towel over his neck, holding both ends. “So you’re her.”
You blinked, not knowing how to respond to that. Perhaps there was no way to respond; the silence was comfortable enough. You decided to keep that in mind for later though.
“He’s … well, he got very drunk,” you informed Mingyu, gesturing to a now-sleeping Wonwoo with both thumbs. “I wanted to make sure he got home okay.”
Mingyu nodded, and then sighed. “I’ll take care of him. Don’t worry,” he promised, opening up the door for you. “Get home safe, okay?”
Wonwoo: Sorry about that the other night. I won’t get drunk like that again. It doesn’t happen very often
You: it’s okay! I’m used to handling drunk people
You: don’t get me wrong, I like to have my fun but it’s easier for me to take care of other people than like … be incoherent and anxious lol
Wonwoo: By the end of the night I was starting to feel that way. Not fun
You: DRINK WATER
You: your roommate is hot btw. does he always walk around without a shirt?
Wonwoo: Of course, he didn’t have a shirt on when you met him
Wonwoo: Everyone likes Mingyu
You: well, I like you [UNSENT]
The bi-annual sales meeting was started to boost morale and talk with other departments that you didn’t see as often. It was typically held at a hotel in the downtown city, with the company flying in all the sales reps from across the country. There were even a few from overseas. In reality though, this was usually the week where coworkers made mistakes. At least one person was let go after these sales meetings, and HR had their eyes peeled for an entire week.
You never made a mistake at one of these. And you didn’t expect to any time soon.
This was a week of rubbing elbows with slimy sales reps and making sure some old man hadn’t spiked your drink. For most, this was a week to slack off, but a woman working in corporate couldn’t relax in these settings. You’d been making corrections to your boss’ presentation for the entire company for what felt like forever. (Realistically, it’d been almost two weeks.) You probably went through the 50 slides at least twice as much, checking for spelling mistakes and making sure it was in the right place on your desktop. Not on some random external hard drive. Not in the trash.
But it was finally the day you’d been dreading. Presentation day, and everyone at the company was eager to hear the Boss reveal if they hit their goal for the year, amongst other things. You checked the slides another time, and then made sure no one would trip over the HDMI cord connected to the projector. The Boss gave you a reassuring smile, and then it was go time.
Your boss could be a shit bag – what CEO wasn’t? – but he had a way of speaking that made everyone so excited for the future. He was probably the reason why morale was always so high, and everyone looked forward to his presentation at these meetings. Your finger hovered over the right arrow button as he went through his speech, pointing out company statistics and what he wanted them all to accomplish this year, before finally getting to the goal reach. And his answer was nothing short of what the audience wanted to hear. He congratulated all of them, and everyone clapped together at the good news.
When you looked out at the crowd that had gathered, you realized almost every seat in the ballroom was filled. Some were even standing near the door and – wait, there was Wonwoo, leaning against the wall in the back. IT didn’t need to be here for this presentation. In fact, they were encouraged to be doing other things, like manning a table near HR and offering on-the-spot tech help. A smile made it’s way to your lips, watching the way Wonwoo was listening intently.
Once the presentation was over and the room erupted in small talk, your boss came over and thanked you for helping out yet again. “Of course,” you replied, as if there was anything else to say. He gave you a comforting squeeze of the hand before walking off to talk to some of his favorite sales reps.
As you shut your laptop and began to place your things in your backpack, Wonwoo slipped into the chair beside yours. Just the sight of his grin set you at ease, but also made you nervous at the same time. Why were you suddenly so nervous? This was just Wonwoo.
Just Wonwoo. Just Wonwoo. Just … your Wonwoo.
“Congratulations,” he beamed, giving you a high five. “I know you’ve been working on this all week, but you did it!”
You always stressed so much about this presentation, but at the end of the day … “All I did was press a button,” you shrugged.
Wonwoo rolled his eyes. “Well, yeah, but you didn’t accidentally delete your file like every other time you’ve messaged me on Slack.” He chuckled, and you scoffed at his teasing. “I’d call that a win.”
The second to last night of sales meeting week was the longest night of the year. It was a tradition for everyone to go out to a bar the company rented out, drinking whatever alcohol they could get their hands on while celebrating a job well done. You only saw half these people twice a year, and half of the time they’d have a beer in their hands.
You did your best to ignore every sales rep that tried to speak with you without slurring their words, but that was damn near impossible when some were already on their second cocktail. However, no matter how embarrassing it was, you did allow them to compliment you and your hard work. Who were you to turn down the validation? And when the time came, even your boss came over to compliment you again, and you realized there was truly nothing like being good at your job.
Just for a moment, everything felt okay. It was like the loneliness dissipated, the sting of years without pleasure or having someone by your side … it all faded when you were rewarded for your hard work.
Maybe tonight was the night you had fun for once.
When you finally found Wonwoo later that night, he was surrounded by a few younger members of the IT team, debating what computer language everyone should be obligated to learn. You waved to him from where you stood by the bar top, and that was all it took to have him walking away from his team and towards you. He wrapped one arm around your shoulders, insisting to buy you drinks for the rest of the night, and you didn’t hesitate to agree. If there was anyone here you trusted enough to hand you a drink, it was Wonwoo.
Just Wonwoo.
The hour was reaching midnight now, and you weren’t sure how many martinis you had, but you were hiccuping a storm. That was a telltale sign that you were totally, thoroughly drunk. Wonwoo was only drinking beer and pacing himself, unlike that night at the dive bar, but he was enjoying the sight of you finally letting loose. You hung on his arm, staring up at him with your big eyes, glazing over from all the alcohol coursing through your system. He didn’t like how this effected him; he shouldn’t be attracted to the way your gaze looked while you were intoxicated. But he couldn’t help but wonder if your eyes held the same shine while your lips were wrapped around his –
No, this was too much. He should take you back to the hotel.
The two of you glanced around the bar, realizing it was mostly cleared out. You definitely needed to leave now.
He tugged on your arm, wrapping one of his around your waist to support you. “C’mon now,” he grunted, helping you walk out. “Let’s get you back.”
“I didn’t f–finish my drink thoooooough,” you argued, despite letting him lead you out of the bar. “And I can walk … on my own. Swear!”
“Listen, you took care of me once,” he said as you two walked into the brisk cold air. The hotel was, thankfully, only a block away. “Let me take care of you.”
Even with the alcohol pumping in your veins, just the sound of those words falling from his mouth made you grip him tighter. You felt like your bones were made of jelly, and it wasn’t just from the vodka. It was him, and the way he made you feel, and how secretly warm he was, and the way he took care of you as you took care of him, and – oh, god, you wanted to cry because you liked Jeon Wonwoo so much.
So, so much.
It was much easier to get you back to your hotel room than his apartment, seeing as this hotel had a working elevator. You slumped beside him, tripping over your feet every so often, as he hauled you down the hallway to your room. You gave him your keycard easily, and once the door was open, he squeezed your hand to silently let you know it was time to move again. He helped you into the room, shutting the door behind him, before laying you down on your bed with the clumsiness only he could have.
You were laughing now, hiccuping from the alcohol, but laughing nonetheless. And he was laughing at your hiccups. Or maybe he just liked the way you grinned at him.
He assisted with taking off your boots and jacket, too embarrassed to remove anything else. And it definitely wasn’t appropriate to either. Tearing back the covers, he nestled you underneath them, and said, “You got everything, right? I’m a call away if you need me.” He grabbed one of the small trash cans in the room and placed it at your bedside. “If you need to vomit and can’t make it to the bathroom, just use the trash can here –”
You hand came out to wrap around his forearm. “Stay, Wonwoo.”
Your sleepy eyes were killing him, making his inhibitions melt and his cock throb at the same time. He sighed, sitting on the side of the mattress, and before he could stop himself, he was tucking hair behind your ear. “You know I can’t do that,” he said, his voice like a caress. “You know how it would look if someone saw me leave this room tomorrow morning. HR is on all our asses this week.”
“I know,” you slurred, and then pressed your flushed cheek into his palm. “I j–just thought you … were taking care of me thoooooooough …”
His resolve crumbled into a million pieces. This was complete, utter torture. You had to know how you effected him, but of course you didn’t, because you were stretching under the covers and yawning like you didn’t just make his heart stop.
That’s how he ended up in your bed, shutting off the lights and settling underneath the comforter. Until you came closer and rested your head on his chest. Despite how fast his heart was beating, he felt so at peace, and you both fell asleep in the clothes you wore out tonight.
Only a few hours later, you woke with a clear head and the beginning of a hangover. Your head was pounding like crazy, and it took everything in you to slip out from the comfort of your bed and pad your feet over to the bathroom. The bright light was burning your eyes, but you needed it to find the Tylenol you left by the sink. Filling a cup with water, you took the medication and prayed it worked sooner rather than later.
You squinted at yourself in the mirror, realizing you were still in the outfit you wore yesterday. With a sigh, you picked up the big t-shirt you left on the floor yesterday morning and stripped yourself until you were in nothing but your underwear. You pulled the t-shirt on and slumped against the wall, pressing your forehead against the cold tile. Now this felt like heaven for your headache.
It took a couple of minutes to get yourself to move again, feet slapping against the floor as you walked out of the bathroom. You noticed Wonwoo was awake too, in the midst of slinking back under the covers, and you saw his jeans abandoned by his bedside.You crawled back to your cocoon of blankets, and he instantly wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you against his chest. And you … you didn’t move away. In fact, you pressed yourself closer, finally hearing how his heart raced. Wonwoo didn’t care if it was probably 4 AM and he probably had to leave in a few hours – before anyone else woke – because he was holding you and smelling you hair. You smelled … god, you smelled so good that it made him hard almost instantly.
You felt his hand splay against your spine, as if trying to hold himself back, and it was then that your eyes opened. The room was dark, but you knew when his gaze was burning into yours only seconds later. You slipped one hand out from the covers, cupping his cheek as your thumb brushed over his lower lip. Under his breath, he muttered a soft, “Shit,” because you both knew where this was going.
You agreed you wouldn’t do this again. You agreed to be friends.
But now you’re kissing again.
Your hand moved from his face to his neck, and his hands are gripping your cheeks to make sure your mouth stayed on his. His fingers were shaking. He kissed you desperately, as if he needed this just to be able to breathe again, and maybe he did. You were like putty in his hands, molding yourself to his body as your tongue tangled with his. Whatever ache you felt in your temples drifted between your legs, causing you to moan into his mouth. And fuck, just the sound of you made his cock swell, precum soaking through his boxers.
The room felt so hot all of a sudden, but your cold hands came in handy as they rested on his neck. His left hand slid down to your ass, finally giving it a firm squeeze after kicking himself for not doing it when he first kissed you. That made you moan again, and he decided he’d never stop touching you like this, just so he could hear these sounds fall from your lips.
He slid his knee between your legs on instinct, and you didn’t hesitate to start grinding against his thigh. The friction felt delicious and soothing. You both kissed each other slower, a little messier, focusing on touching each other everywhere you dreamed about all these months. Your fingers traced down the column of his neck, down the thin cotton of the shirt he was still wearing from yesterday, while bucking against his thigh. His lips left yours, dragging across your cheek so he could nibble on your earlobe, feeling it grow warm and red from all the attention. “You have no idea how long I’ve needed you,” he whispered, and you damn near almost came from that confession.
You weren’t used to this; you couldn’t remember the last time you experienced pleasure like this with someone, but you couldn’t imagine stopping. Not when he angled his thigh just right, the muscle in his leg rubbing against your clit, your panties completely soaked. You cupped him over his boxers, feeling his bulge throb in your palm, and you cooed, “Can I …”
He groaned. You didn’t need to say more; Wonwoo was smart enough to know what you were insinuating. He felt disoriented, drunk off of you and your touch, smell, everything. “Are you … are you sure you don’t want to …” His voice was giving out, but from the way your fingers were slipping under the waistband of his boxers, you knew you wanted just this, and he’d give you whatever you wanted. “Yes. Yes, of course. That’s fine,” he finished.
You chuckled softly. He smiled against your neck. Pulling his cock out and wrapping your palm around it, you began to stroke him slowly. “Oh, god,” he was sighing into the crook of your neck, his brain in such a state of disarray when you resumed grinding against his leg while also pumping him from base to tip. This couldn’t be real; he had to be dreaming, but he could feel your wet panties sticking to his thigh. He could feel himself shake as he clung to you and pressed sloppy, wet kisses to your throat. It was all too much, but not enough at the same time.
“Wonwoo,” you whimpered, and he dragged his lips back to yours just to feel how your mouth moved when you said his name. You bucked your hips faster, your arousal coating his thigh, and warmth bloomed between your legs. When your hand on his cock reached his head again, you rubbed the pad of your thumb over his slit, making more precum bead onto your knuckles. “Wanna cum with you,” you begged, stroking him faster and in time with your hips.
“I know you do, I know,” he breathed against your lips. “Just a little faster … yes, just like that. Fuck.”
Only a moment later were you trembling, hips stuttering as pleasure took over your body. You came hard, squeezing his thigh between your legs, and your cry was swallowed by Wonwoo’s lips. If he didn’t kiss you, he knew he’d moan so loud it would wake the entire hotel. Because – oh, god, he was cumming now, and he was sighing against your mouth as he erupted in your hand, ropes of cum staining your t-shirt. He could’ve swore he saw white. He’d never felt a release like this before; not with anyone else. Not even when he jerked off. But maybe it was because this was your hand and you were cumming on his leg, and fuck –
You were still shaking in each other’s arms, minds blank and reeling, bodies coming down from the high. It took the kind of strength that moved mountains to slip from his arms and clean yourself up. But by the time you came back from the bathroom and cuddled up next to him, Wonwoo was already fast asleep.
Jeon Wonwoo [6:08 AM]: I had to leave early this morning before anyone woke. But if you want, I’d like to see you at breakfast this morning :)
You [7:31 AM]: Jeon Wonwoo, I’m begging you to just text this to me
You [7:31 AM]: Also, was your phone hacked? Since when do you use emojis?
There wasn’t much to do on the last day of sales meeting week. The only things on your plate were to make niceties with some of the new reps, and probably attend a few presentations by HR. When you had finally woken up this morning to just you in the bed, you almost considered skipping the HR presentations, feeling too guilty and like they might see right through you. It was irrational, but you were sure that this was the only way to feel after realizing that you hooked up with your coworker and friend.
Not that you hadn’t wanted to. Not that you hadn’t been thinking about it since your kiss. No, it wasn’t like that at all.
So why were suddenly terrified to see him at breakfast?
You got ready as quick as you could – but of course, making sure you wore that V-neck sweater that showed off your cleavage just right – and threw your hair up before leaving your hotel room. The line for the breakfast buffet was packed, but you waited patiently and decided to sit near the bar once you plate was full. The rest of the dining room was filled with people and you weren’t awake enough to make shitty small talk. Sitting here at the bar top was peaceful and quiet –
“Is this … seat taken?”
Your eyes met his instantly, and you noticed the way Wonwoo was cringing at the line he threw at you. You decided to forget it, for his sake, and gestured for him to sit down. Fuck, you were so goddamn nervous, even though you had agreed to meet him in the first place. You wore this low-cut sweater for him. You both sat in silence for a bit, crunching awkwardly on the burnt bacon, and shifting in your seats.
“Did you …” You were surprised that your mouth was moving on it’s own volition, spilling any words that came to your head. “… Do anything this morning since you were up early?”
Wonwoo choked a bit on a strawberry, but recovered quickly. “Uh … yeah, yeah, sure. Once I came down here, one of the IT interns found me in a panic because he couldn’t set up one of the rep’s new work phones. Created a whole scene over nothing.”
You snorted and sipped your coffee. “Is that intern still breathing?”
His eyes flickered to yours, a slow smile growing on his face. “Yes, actually.”
You fell into sync then, letting the awkward silence melt away as you joked about Wonwoo’s interns. He wasn’t meant to teach college students, god help them. But as your plates became empty and a server came around to take them, you two were left with only the mugs in your hands, strangely reminiscent of that apology coffee he bought for you so long ago.
Wonwoo sighed. “Hey, so about last night – or I guess, this morning …”
“Thank you for taking care of me,” you interjected, setting your coffee down. “I have a hangover, but I am thriving.”
He blinked. “Well, that’s good. But I was referring to –”
You almost couldn’t look at him when you said, “The fact that we’re definitely not just friends anymore?”
He chuckled. “Yeah, that part.”
“I …” You licked your lips as you gathered yourself. There was this … terrifying flutter in your chest. You’d never felt something like this before, but you weren’t keen on letting it go. Not yet. “I would like to see you again. Like that. Definitely not during work hours. If you catch my drift. This is awkward.”
Wonwoo had to turn his head so you wouldn’t see him trying to hold in his laughter, but it was clear as day. You sighed loud and hit his arm, making him look at you once again as he snickered to himself. “You know, you could just ask me if I want to hang out.”
You leveled a look at him and huffed. “Okay, Wonwoo, do you –”
“Yes,” he beamed. “Always, yes.”
You found yourself at Wonwoo’s side more often than not. What used to be work get togethers transitioned to meeting up at a bar, or checking a new restaurant on the weekends. Sometimes he’d ask you to come over so you could taste test a new recipe he found. (Unfortunately for both of you, Wonwoo wasn’t very good at cooking, but he was getting better. Somewhat.) Those recipe nights, however, always led to him lifting you up on his creaky kitchen counter and kissing you so hard that you almost forgot to breathe. Until Mingyu came into the kitchen, making a gagging sound, and you two instantly detached from each other.
Friday nights were known as Mingyu’s Movie Nights, and Wonwoo began inviting you to those. He had said that this would help knock a few movies off your Letterboxd Watchlist, but you knew that was just an excuse for wanting to see you. You probably saw him more than anyone now, but you couldn’t deny that you … wanted to see him too. Having him in your life made everything suddenly better. He was kind and smart and thoughtful. He made you laugh in ways you couldn’t explain, and obviously … he didn’t have to do much to make you want him. He’d simply have to look at you and you’d get on his lap. If Mingyu wasn’t there, of course.
Wonwoo seemed to blossomed with you. He was more excited to leave his apartment, more eager to become a better cook. He spoke up often, whether it be at work or out with you, rather than letting someone talk. He wanted to learn all the things that you liked, wanted to touch you exactly where you needed it, wanted to find new ways to leave you breathless. Because it was for you.
Even Mingyu noticed a difference in his friend. He’d known Wonwoo for so many years now, but he’d never made this much of a change for anyone. One night, when you and Mingyu were alone in the kitchen, he mentioned, “He’s different around you.” And then kept pouring wine in three glasses while Wonwoo picked a movie from the living room.
There were also times where Wonwoo was a booty call, of course, and neither of you had any problems with that. Some nights, Wonwoo would call you after Mingyu went to bed, begging you to come over, but ended up settling for phone sex. His attraction to you in stockings only went up, and it was difficult for him to contain his arousal at work when you strutted around just knowing how it affected him. There was days where all he wanted to do was pull you into a janitor closet and fuck the living daylights out of you. But it wasn’t like you’d let him anyway.
You had your fair share of desperate moments too. Especially tonight, as you were out drinking with your friends at a local spot you’d been coming to for years. The live band was loud and you’d had your fair share of shitty margaritas already. One of your friends was tugging on the arm of some rando she met on the dance floor, yelling over the music that she was leaving and she’d text you when she was home safe. That left you shit out of luck for a ride home, and suddenly very lonely. The last thing you wanted was to drink alone at a shitty bar on a Saturday night.
Wandering outside, your heeled boots crunched in the snow as you looked for the nearest Uber. The fastest one around would take over 20 minutes to get to you, and as you looked around the empty city streets … wait, didn’t Wonwoo live around here? Maybe all the tequila was just getting to you. But you called him anyway, and despite the time reaching 1 AM, he answered instantly. He heard the slight lisp in your voice, and once he got out of you exactly where you were, he realized you were right. It only took him about 10 minutes to get to where you were, parking on the side of the road.
He sighed at the sight of you sitting on the curb, shivering and hugging your jacket around you. Various drunk people filtered in and out of the bar, but none of them checked on you – a freezing girl just sitting on the side of the road. “Why didn’t you wait inside for me?” He asked, his breath hot against your cheek when he pulled you up in his arms. Your dress rode up a little, and his hands were quick to yank it back down. “It’s the middle of winter.”
“I jusssst thought … the cold air would sssssober me up,” you slurred, letting him place you in his passenger seat before running back over to the driver’s side. His car was warm, making you bury yourself in your jacket, but his hand on your thigh was even warmer somehow. If your fingers weren’t so cold, you’d wrap your hand around his wrist, inching his palm up higher as he drove.
Once he was parked, he wasted no time getting you out and helping you up the stairs to his apartment. Mingyu was passed out on the couch, an old movie from the 80s playing on the TV, but you could hardly register it because your brain was spinning and Wonwoo was practically dragging you to his bedroom. He was grateful that all the lights were off so you couldn’t see how messy it was, but honestly, it was a miracle if you could see anything clearly right now.
He sat you down on the bed and you looked up at him with bleary eyes, which made you so fucking hard to resist. All the tequila you drank was pumping through your bloodstream, and you couldn’t help but fist your hands in his t-shirt and try to kiss him. He evaded your lips though – no matter how much he wanted to – and you whined, “Whyyyyyy won’t you kiss me?”
“Shhh …” He whispered, yanking off your boots. “Inside voice. Mingyu’s sleeping.”
You smacked your hands against his mattress. “He’s sleeping in the living room!”
Wonwoo got back to his feet, gesturing as he instructed, “Arms up.” You were too intoxicated to do anything but oblige, lifting your arms as he struggled to pull your dress over your head. Once it was off and thrown to the side with your boots, your hazy vision caught him looking through his drawers for clothes for you to wear. But didn’t he just take your clothes off? You could’ve sworn he did that because he wanted you too right now.
You protested when he tried putting you in one of his simple white tees, but your body felt too limp to fight. He slipped the shirt over your head before pulling back his comforter and wrapping you in it. With your eyes half open, you watched him come to the other side of the bed, yanking his pants down and crawling in bed beside you. He reached over you and set his glasses on the side table. You sighed dramatically. Now he was just torturing you. Wonwoo simply chuckled to himself, realizing what you were angry about.
His arms instantly wound around you, his lips pulled into a smile at your hairline. You looked up at him with a scowl and your voice slurred, “Whysss your eyes closed?”
Wonwoo snickered under his breath. “Because it’s late and I’m tired.” His hand on your lower back traced circles, attempting to coax you to sleep.
“I thought you wanted meeeee,” you complained. Your hand reached in between you two, smoothing your palm against his groin as he slowly started to harden under your touch. You heard his breath hitch slightly, so you kept going, a soft ache beginning between your own legs at just the thought of putting him in your mouth.
“Sweetheart, I always want you.” He then grabbed your wrist, moving your hand away from him, and then lacing your fingers together. Pressing a kiss to the side of your forehead, he sighed sleepily, “But you’re much sexier when you’re sober.”
You started to realize why you didn’t usually do this, why it had been so long since you let someone see every part of you. What you looked like completely stripped down – both inside and out – completely vulnerable for your person. How your face contorted during pleasure, and how it relaxed when you were taken care of.
Catching feelings like this meant giving up control.
You didn’t work on the weekends unless you had to, and when the Boss sent you a high priority email on Saturday morning, you didn’t hesitate. He had transferred over a bunch of sensitive files that were needed for a board presentation first thing Monday morning. But of course, something just had to go wrong: the files were corrupted and you had no way of figuring out what to do. And it wasn’t like your boss was on call like you were on a Saturday.
This was how you ended up at Wonwoo’s apartment.
You had called him in a panic, explaining what had went wrong, but he didn’t seem too fazed. He was used to your tech emergencies by now. But by the time you got to his apartment, out of breath after running from the train station, he had realized just how serious you were taking this. You both sat down on his couch and you let him work his magic. His fingers moved across the keys as if he were a musician, and you couldn’t stop biting your nail nervously.
Mingyu came back to the apartment after grocery shopping, waving at you before putting all the food away. Seeing as you were here, maybe they could all go out and have fun tonight. He went into the living room, ready to mention a band that was playing at a local venue later, but upon seeing the stressed look on both your faces, he exhaled. “It’s a Saturday,” he stated matter-of-factly. “Why do you two look like that?”
“Corrupted documents,” Wonwoo answered quickly, not even looking up from the monitor.
“I don’t even want to know more,” he said, grabbing his leather jacket from the coat rack and tugging his arms through the sleeves. “Just your faces are making me anxious. I’m heading out. Don’t wait up.”
You gave Mingyu a wave as he left, but Wonwoo was too focused to even say goodbye. It took about another hour and one cup of coffee, but Wonwoo eventually figured out how to uncorrupt the files. You let out a sigh of relief as he handed the laptop back to you and you were able to open each of them without issue. Thank god, you had managed to figure this out before Monday morning. And … having Wonwoo wasn’t too bad either.
“Thank you,” you beamed, not being able to resist pinching his cheek. “My hero.”
Silence engulfed the room as you both noticed how the sky was already getting dark. You cleared your throat, slipping your laptop back into your bag and muttering, “Thanks again. I know I kind of barged in and wasted your Saturday afternoon –”
Like the saint he was, Wonwoo simply smiled at you. “No time with you is a waste.”
Whatever words you were about to say clogged in your throat. You swallowed hard, attempting to hide your fluster, but you ended up choking out, “I … should go.”
“You don’t have to.” He stood from the couch, walking over to you and running his hands down your arms. His brow lifted. “Do you want to?”
You let the strap of your bag fall to the floor as your hands cupped his neck. “No, not particularly.”
Wonwoo chuckled, leaning in and letting his lips just lightly graze yours. “We have the place to ourselves,” he hummed, slowly dragging you backwards with him. “Mingyu’s gone … probably won’t be back until midnight.”
You bit your lip to suppress a giggle, letting him lead you to his room, as limp as a rag doll. Once he shut his bedroom door behind you, he flicked the light on. You pressed your back against the door and your eyes roamed around the space. This was the first time you saw his bedroom with the light on; every other time had been pitch black. You liked that his walls weren’t bare – they were filled with posters of his favorite musicians or photographs. On his desk was a large monitor and a gaming set up, but also a camera with stacks of film next to it. His furniture was old – probably from the 90s, probably passed down from his family – but the scratches within the wood told a story. And unlike most men, his sheets were gray.
Wonwoo realized you were scanning his room, and he became acutely aware of the clothes scattered amongst his floor. He muttered something to himself, beginning to pick up the clothes piles and chuck them into his hamper. “Sorry,” he murmured. “I wish I inherited the organized gene like Mingyu.”
You tilted your head, striding over and pulling him up, making him halt his actions. Your hands went to his face as you brought him closer. With a smile, you whispered, “I don’t want to talk about Mingyu,” before pressing your lips to his.
The kiss became deep far too quickly, or maybe time was passing faster than usual. Your lips crashed so hard against his that they’d bruise. He took off his glasses, setting them on his drawer, before his fingers hooked into the belt loops of your jeans. You stepped forward, making him step back, then another, and another – until you had him falling back on his bed. You straddled him, arching your back so you could lick into his mouth just how he liked. Hands sliding up his shirt, you felt his abdomen flex underneath you. His fingers in your belt loops jerked you closer, pressing your hips to his, and it wasn’t long before he was moaning into the kiss.
You smiled against his mouth, dragging your lips down his neck, and then even further, as you slinked down his body. Your eyes were trained on his, and he was trying his best not to look like a complete idiot in front of you. But it was difficult when you were looking at him with those eyes and – oh, now you were pulling down the waistband of his sweatpants, practically salivating when you noticed how hard he was already.
But … this was what you guys always did. Not that he had an issue with you giving him blow jobs, but none of this felt particularly intimate. You never really let him worship you; you took control of the entire situation. As if you were bringing your professional stubbornness to the bedroom.
“Wait,” he choked out as you palmed his growing bulge. “Can we … can we try something different?”
Your brows furrowed and you continued pressing sloppy kisses above his groin. “Why would we do that?”
Wonwoo let out a frustrated sound, and before you could prepare yourself, he was yanking his pants back up and pinning you underneath him. You blinked up at him in surprise, and he was gripping your wrists above your head now, his bodyweight pressing you into the mattress. He almost looked shocked that he had the strength to push you back, but his blown-out pupils gave away his true desire.
“What was that for?” You asked incredulously. Nerves clouded your thoughts, making you stutter. “I thought … I thought you liked …”
“No, trust me, I do,” he assured you, and then tipped his head as he gazed down at you. “I just … why won’t you let me take care of you?”
You scoffed then, trying to cover up how petrifying this conversation was becoming. Were you that transparent now, or did he simply know you far too well for your own good?
“I have no idea what you’re –”
Wonwoo gave you one of his infamous leveled looks, and you sighed. “You’re in constant need of seeking control when it’s always at your fingertips. It’s okay to let it go; it won’t slip away.” He let go of your wrists then, but kept his body hovering over yours, holding himself up by his elbows resting near your head. “Please, just … surrender it for once. Let me take the lead.”
You glanced down at your hands on your chest, twiddling your thumbs. Eventually, you murmured, “It’s hard. I’ve never done that before.”
“Can we try? I like …” He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, then let his head fall as he chuckled to himself. “This is so awkward. I just – I like prioritizing your pleasure. It feels much better for me and I think it will for you too. And if you don’t like it –”
“I’m not good with change,” you blurted.
“I know,” he whispered, his voice taking on that husky tone that made warmth pool in your stomach. His eyes flickered to your lips now, noticing how swollen they still were. “I won’t make you do anything you don’t want to do. It was just a suggestion, and I probably ruined the mood.”
You shook your head immediately, allowing your fingers to tenderly sweep over his shirt. “No, I …” A voice in the back of your head told you this was a good thing, and you did want this, but the fear of change was overwhelming. You wanted to step out of your comfort zone, desperately, for once. You were allowed to do this; you were allowed to be happy.
Your gaze met his again. “I want to try.”
His eyes softened with affection, but then he asked, “You’re not just agreeing for my sake, right?”
“Now when have I ever done that?” You laughed, making him smile along with you.
But as soon as his mouth met yours, that awkward, giggling persona seemed to melt away. Jeon Wonwoo morphed into an entirely different person, someone that possessed your jaw in his large hand, pulling at your bottom lip before kissing you harder. It was enough to leave you gasping for air once he pulled away, spit connecting you two, and he continued to suck and nip his way down your throat. He made sure to leave marks in places that could be covered up for work, but he’d know exactly where they were. God, would he even be able to control himself at his desk, knowing where his bites were hiding under your clothes?
Tugging your sweater over your head, he practically whined at the sight of your breasts, constricted in the bra that you told him was too old once, but you kept wearing it anyway because he said it was cute. He lifted you for a moment, expertly removing it with one hand, before licking the valley between your breasts. You arched into him, sighing into your arm when he swirled his tongue around your taut nipple. He glanced up and realized you were hiding your face, so he pushed your hand off. “I want you to look at me while I do this,” he cooed, but it sounded more like a demand.
Despite the embarrassment, you did as he asked, feeling completely bewitched as you watched him cup the swell of your breast, tugging on your nipple. This felt like a goddamn Pornhub video. You two have had sex before, yes, but not like this. Never like this. Wonwoo had always let you do what you were comfortable with, keeping his other side at bay while you rode him hard on the couch. But this … this felt like something else entirely. The way he was lavishing both your nipples, coating them with his spit, demanding you to watch … Expletives filtered softly from your mouth, wetness gathering between your thighs. It suddenly felt too hot and your jeans were still on.
Wonwoo was taking his time with you though, and it was very clear to you that this wouldn’t just be one of those nights where you had sex for 10 minutes before ordering pizza. When he lifted his mouth from your left nipple, he asked calmly, “Do you like this or do you want more?”
You sneered, “Well, of course, I like –”
His hand came up instantly to pinch your other nipple, and you couldn’t stop the whimper that came out of your mouth. “No teasing,” he said, lowering his head to flick that nipple with his tongue. “Just answer me.”
“More,” you choked out, your hips arching off the bed, seeking friction. “Please, more.”
He chuckled, pressing a kiss between your breasts once again, before lowering himself down your body. His eyes never left yours as he dragged his lips down your stomach. Eventually, he had to stand from the bed so he could finally unzip your pants, tugging when they got stuck around your ankles. When the cold air hit between your legs, you realized how soaked you were already. Wonwoo smirked to himself, slowly rolling your panties down your legs.
“Don’t let it get to your head,” you joked, kicking your panties off into a pile by his bed.
He lifted your ankle, nipping playfully, and replied, “Told you that you’d like me taking the lead.”
You rolled your eyes as he settled between your thighs, bending your knees back so your feet rested beside his head. You bit your lip as he placed sloppy kisses on your inner thigh, biting hard enough to make a bruise. Wonwoo fought hard to maintain a sense of composure, but god, the sight of your pretty pussy oozing slick made him wonder if he could cum untouched. You had let him finger you before, but had never been in the mood for this. And this was something Wonwoo had been fantasizing about since the day he noticed that tear in your stockings. He could jump for joy if that didn’t make him look like an absolute fucking loser.
He pushed your folds apart with two fingers, running a hand down his face as he attempted to school his expression. It was just so fucking hard to act cool when you were this aroused. Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip. You reached out and brushed his hair back from his forehead, deciding to quip, “Wonwoo, can you even find the clit without your glasses on –”
Without warning, he spit on your pussy and buried his face between your thighs. The words died on your tongue immediately, and you let out the loudest whine he’d ever heard in his life. He smiled, but that didn’t deter him from circling his tongue around your clit. He wound one of his arms around your thigh, holding you in place as he pressed his face further.
Wrapping his lips around your clit, he sucked and drew out the prettiest sounds from you, using his free hand to slip two fingers inside you. You tasted exactly like he dreamed about, sweet and tangy and so unmistakably you. He looked up at you from between your legs, curling his fingers in the spot that made tears prick at your eyes, and when your gaze found his, it was like something in him snapped. “Fuck,” he muttered, his voice muffled, feasting at you like he’d been starved for days.
Your fingers were in his hair now, pressing his head more into you, which only made this more enjoyable for him. He nearly came in his pants when your hips began to buck against his face, but this was about you. And him experiencing you cumming on his face. But mostly you. His fingers pumped faster inside you and his tongue was now flicking your clit, allowing more of your arousal to invade his mouth. He’d never get tired of this taste; he was obsessed. Now that he finally got a taste of you … he never wanted to not be doing this. Never wanted his face too far from the apex of your legs. Not when you had the sweetest taste that could move heaven and earth between these thighs.
And when you finally came on his tongue, he noticed that your legs shook like an earthquake. Your essence flooded his mouth, and he moaned – god, did he moan – lapping at you, never missing a drop of what you gave him. His fingers kept curling inside of you, making your orgasm feel like forever. When he finally removed them with a wet pop, he didn’t miss the opportunity to have more of you, wrapping his mouth around those two fingers and licking off the last of your release. You watched him, completely mesmerized by the way he savored you, even darting his tongue out to capture the whatever seeped out of you. Your hips jolted, suddenly so sensitive, and he grinned up at you.
You hardly caught your breath before he crawling up your body, kissing you hard and letting you taste yourself on his tongue. Your hands fisted in his t-shirt, and when you ripped your lips away from his, you arched a brow. “You are still fully clothed,” you reminded, and then swiped at the spit lining his bottom lip.
Wonwoo simply smiled, ghosting his lips over yours before trailing them to your ear. “I’m getting to that part. Patience,” he whispered, nibbling on your earlobe. “You must really want me inside you.”
“I want to not be the only one naked.”
“Say it,” he prodded in a weirdly casual tone.
“What?”
“Say you want me inside you.”
“This is ridiculous –”
He lifted his head from your jawline. “I can easily leave this room and order a pizza,” he teased, and you blinked at him. He was actually being serious. He would completely ignore what looked like a throbbing erection in his pants, just to make a point. You knew he wasn’t trying to be mean; he wanted to get you out of your comfort zone. This was so stupid, because you did want him inside you. Embarrassingly so. He had just given you one of the best orgasms of your life, but you still had this … aching need to be filled. Your cheeks heated just at the thought of it.
“I …” Your eyes closed for a moment, trying not to make your whole face turn bright red. With a sigh, your eyes connected again, and you answered, “I want you inside me, Wonwoo.”
He rewarded you with a kiss, pulling away before it could get too heated again, and stood from the bed. “Well, when you ask nicely …” He smiled, that dominating demeanor slipping for a moment as he pulled his shirt off. You’d never get tired of the way Wonwoo looked without a shirt. He didn’t let anyone see it very often – he wasn’t like his roommate – but the moments he did, you felt eternally grateful. His torso was toned, with defined abs and pecks that made your mind boggle. You liked that his arms were long and muscled; his hands large and slightly calloused.
You liked everything about him.
When he finally went to kick off his sweatpants, he noticed a large precum stain on the gray fabric from just eating you out. Which was probably the biggest jab to his calm and collected attitude right now, but he didn’t let it slip. He simply threw the sweatpants to the side, coming up close to the bed again, where your legs were now hanging off the edge. You gazed up at him as if he held the world in his palms, watching the way he reached into his boxers and pulled out his cock. Your eyes widened at the sight, never used to the size. He was slightly thicker than average, but long. Longer than you ever expected. With a pretty pink head leaking sticky precum.
It was killing you how long he was taking. Your legs shifted, ready to make a move to yank him underneath you, but he was faster than you. He pinned your wrists about your head with one hand this time, using his other to keep a firm grip on his cock. “You want to be in control that badly, huh?” He asked, tilting his head.
His hand was moving up and down his shaft now, letting precum dribble on your stomach. Your eyes flickered from his cock back to his eyes. “I just … I need you, Wonwoo,” you begged, your voice taking on a new tone. And somehow … wanting him so bad like this was ten times more arousing than riding him on the couch. “Please, please, Wonwoo. Please, fuck me.”
Your pleas had him falling apart, and he sighed, letting go of your wrists to discard his boxers too. His cock flopped against his stomach, hard and aching and – fuck, had he always been veiny? He got on top of you again, cooing against your lips, “I know, baby, I know.” His rubbed the underside of his length against your wet folds, moaning at the slightest bit of friction. “I’ll fuck you real good. I promise.”
Pressing the head of his cock at your entrance, his breath hitched at just the feeling of your arousal coating his shaft. You both had never taken your time with sex. But he was doing that tonight now that he was in control, letting himself slowly push inside you, feel you completely stretch open for him. You mewled, slinking your arms around his neck and carding your fingers at the nape. And when he finally buried himself to the hilt, his lips fell open and he groaned. You felt so good he could cum right now, but he needed to get a grip. The last thing he needed was to cum too fast.
Not that you would like him any less if he did.
“Wonwoo,” you cried, your hips arching up to meet his. “Please.”
Your voice snapped him out of whatever trance-like state he was in. He settled more on top of you, resting his elbows on both sides of your head, and pulled all the way out so only the tip remained. You whined at the emptiness, which soon changed to a gasp when he bullied his cock back in. Your fingers tugged at his hair; your legs crossed around his waist, drawing him deeper inside. “Fuck,” he muttered, still feeling how tight you were, how you molded yourself for him. “So fucking … god, so wet.”
His restraint could only last so long. He’d gotten his fill of feeling you adjust around him. He couldn’t take this anymore, or he was going to cum before you both had even started. With a deep breath, he set a brutal pace inside of you, his hips snapping forward. Tears rolled down your cheeks; how could something feel so good that you cried? Wonwoo seemed to be thinking the same thing, because he was burying his face in the crook of your neck and groaning, “God, so good … you feel so good … how can anyone feel this good?”
The only word you could choke out was, “Ditto,” which you’d regret for hours after this. But now was not the time.
He was fucking into you so hard that you were already sore, but you were holding onto him for dear life, clinging to him as that warmth burned in your gut. The way his cock curved and grazed your g-spot perfectly, making you tremble and whimper his name like a prayer. He placed a hand on your stomach, feeling how deep his cock nestled inside you, and you noticed him shiver in your arms. He was trying desperately to fight off his release. That coil in your gut began to tighten, and from the way Wonwoo was breathing, you knew he wasn’t going to last much longer. He wanted you to cum first though – like always – wanted to feel you clamp around him, squeeze him so tight that he saw white.
So he did what he did best: reached in between your bodies, finding your swollen, sensitive clit so easily, and rubbed slow circles. He lifted his head from your neck, wanting to see that familiar look in your eyes when you saw stars. “Are you gonna cum for me?” His voice was so deep that it reverberated against your chest.
And finally, as he pressed his thumb down hard and pushed into you just right, you felt your orgasm crest. “Fuck, Wonwoo,” you sobbed, body shaking as you came undone.
But Wonwoo wasn’t stopping. He kept fucking into you, making your eyes roll to the back of your head. And when your walls squeezed him so tight, he buried himself completely and came hard, a generous amount of fucks leaving his lips. His cheek pressed against yours; his groans muffled by the comforter. You held him close as he filled you to the brink with his release, and it almost felt like hours before he realized he finished.
You exhaled together, allowing your heart rates to settle. He turned his head slightly, pressing a kiss to your cheek, and then to your nose, and now he was kissing all over your face. Your cheeks instantly tinged pink, but you let him do as he pleased. He didn’t even make a move off you, letting his cock soften inside your warmth. When your eyes opened, he was staring down at you like you were the sun. You searched his eyes, “What?”
His dark gaze flickered to your lips for a moment, and then he asked, “Did you really say, ‘Ditto,’ during sex?”
You and Wonwoo had gotten into a routine. Of course, you saw him 5 days out of the week at work, but you wanted more of him. You figured out Mingyu’s schedule, coming over most nights when he wasn’t home – besides Mingyu’s Movie Nights. You would let Wonwoo cook for you, and he promised he was getting better, before he led you to his room with kisses to your neck and a firm grip on your hand.
He always went with whatever you were comfortable with, but you found yourself letting him take the lead more often than not. You liked letting him prioritize you; you liked being selfish with him. Giving up control felt … much better than anticipated. Everything about this felt too good to be true. But you couldn’t help yourself, and you didn’t want to spoil it by asking him the dreaded, “What are we?” For now, you’d exist in your safe little bubble, where he would smile at you at work and then fuck your brains out after hours. It felt perfect, simple.
You approached sex through a different lens now. Instead of simply riding him on that godforsaken old couch, you let him go at his own pace: placing you on his lap, having his way with you and making you cum at least 3 times before he sunk you down on his cock, bouncing you up and down as you clung to him, practically letting him use you as a flesh light. Even when he let you sit on his face, it was on his terms: his hands gripping your hips hard enough to leave a mark, trying to suffocate himself with your pussy, not allowing you to cum until he said so, no matter how much you needed to. But it felt too good to stop. You didn’t want this to stop. You liked the lack of control, liked the way he took care of you. The way he bent your knees back as he slid into you, keeping eye contact, so you’d feel him that much deeper … the way he could feast on you for hours, never getting enough of your taste … there was something about it that made you feel more than beautiful.
Especially when he looked at you as if you were his world.
Especially when he fucked into you and you realized you might be in love with him.
You tended to get lost in thought while laying in bed on an early morning. The birds chirped outside, your phone chimed along with each new notification. Curling underneath your comforter, you held your pounding head, reminiscing on last Sunday. You had gone over Wonwoo’s apartment and he had surprised you with a spaghetti dinner. Mingyu promised that it was “more edible than usual” before he left you two alone in the apartment.
You had noticed the shine in Wonwoo’s eyes, how excited he was to do this for you. He had never bothered to learn anything for anyone, but all he wanted to do was please you. To make you happy. And you could see that in the way he gazed at you, making your stomach do flip flops. Letting him have all this control over you, letting him see past the fortress you’d kept up for who knows how long … it was scary and exhilarating all at the same time.
He taught you how to play his favorite video game after dinner, placing you in between his legs on the couch and letting you lean back against his broad chest. His arms cocooned around you, nestling your body in his embrace. Sometimes he would nibble on your ear as you fought to maintain hand-eye coordination with the controller. Eventually, you had given up and asked to watch him, but that led to his hand dropping the controller as the enemy killed him off. And then his fingers were slowly slipping down the waistband of your leggings, rubbing your slit over your panties. You had arched into him, your ass pressing against his hardening erection as he pulled your panties to the side, already finding you wet and ready for his touch. He chuckled in your ear, “How long have you been thinking about this?” His index finger rubbed tight circles on your clit, and all that you could formulate for a response was a moan as he –
You cut yourself off from the memory before it could end you.
Your stomach churned. Despite your better judgement, you had completely fallen head-over-heels for senior IT specialist, Jeon Wonwoo, and that was terrifying. He had seen your personality unfold, seen the most vulnerable parts of you. But nothing was more scary than admitting to yourself how much you liked him, maybe even loved. You were frantic to the point of exhaustion, so stressed that you felt sick. Soon you were shivering, your head pounding as a fever came on, and you stayed home from work for a few days. Your phone notifications be damned – you stayed in your bedroom with the blinds closed, sleeping the days away.
Every so often, you would hear your phone chime. Your phone screen would light up with another text message. But … you couldn’t bring yourself to answer him. This behavior was illogical and stupid; you just simply couldn’t help yourself. You were an avoidant. The only thing you knew how to do was slowly push him away before he saw all the layers underneath your carefully crafted facade.
What if he finally saw how anxious you were all the time?
What if he knew how you secretly craved to be loved your entire life, but you looked for it elsewhere, in places like workplace praise or crowded bars where you couldn’t see another person’s face?
What if he knew you weren’t as organized up in your head as you were at your desk?
Or worse … what if he didn’t like you back?
TUESDAY, APRIL 22
Wonwoo: What’s going on?
Wonwoo: I managed to find out that you’re sick. I can make you soup, if you want? I know my cooking is terrible. But what if this time it’s good and it cures you?
Wonwoo: If I threaten to message you on Slack, will that make you reply?
Wonwoo: I promise I won’t. Unless … lol
Wonwoo: You’re not dead, right?
Wonwoo: Please, answer me.
FRIDAY, APRIL 25
UNKNOWN: hey, it’s Mingyu. I found your number in Wonwoo’s phone. he’s really messed up right now and worrying about you.
UNKNOWN: idk what’s going on between you two, but I don’t like seeing him like this.
UNKNOWN: just … call him. or text him. or something.
Jeon Wonwoo [10:13 AM]: Did your computer die and you need a new charger?
Jeon Wonwoo [3:21 PM]: I miss you.
When you finally returned to work, it’s on a day that your cubicle mate had decided to work from home. You couldn’t decide if that was a blessing or curse until the next day, when you wished that he decided to work from home forever. It was on a Tuesday morning that you finally faced him again, locking eyes with him from across the boardroom table in an all-hands meeting. You weren’t sure what to say, weren’t sure what you could say, but … he didn’t speak to you any way. In fact, even when you both got back to your desks, he kept quiet, throwing on his headphones and focusing on whatever task was at hand. His attitude change wasn’t exactly surprising, but you couldn’t bring yourself to speak to him either.
All your other coworkers looked bewildered. The silence between you two made just about everyone feel awkward. They all saw how close you and Wonwoo had become, and now everything just felt … flat. Silent. Empty. It was like you two were strangers. Maybe you had never really known each other in the first place, if you could both discard each other so easily.
But that just seemed too good to be true. You thought about him everyday, despite yourself, and he had to think of you too. You caught his eyes on you every once in a while, and you couldn’t help but yearn for him in silence. It was probably time for you to take charge again and make the first move, but you found yourself hesitating. Again. You were overwhelmed with thoughts of rejection.
This was why you never gave up control with someone before. It left you suddenly so, so doubtful.
You [1:34 PM]: I can’t get into my Outlook. I think I’ve locked myself out
Jeon Wonwoo is now offline.
You [1:36 PM]: I miss you too
It was a busy Sunday, the first notes of Spring evident in the air. You needed to go to the post office today, the supermarket, probably check in on your parents … but that was all discarded when you made the sudden decision to take a taxi to Wonwoo’s apartment. Your hands were shaking more than his when he first touched you. Your leg was bouncing with anxiety, and when the taxi finally pulled up to his building, you considered never getting out.
But you couldn’t continue being a coward. Besides, this driver had places to be, with the way he was arguing for you to pay in cash.
You were lucky enough to slide in through the building’s entrance while someone was walking out. The less you had to embarrass yourself by calling Mingyu to let you in, the better. The walk up those two flights of stairs was long and tiring, and it wasn’t because you always hated them. You physically couldn’t make yourself go faster, too frightened of what he was going to say when he saw you. Maybe he wouldn’t say anything; maybe he’d slam the door in your face. And you couldn’t blame him, because now you were at his door and – oh, god, you wanted to hurl.
The door was opening before you could even catch your breath. When you caught that first glimpse of Mingyu, you realized how much of a mistake this was. You could always turn back, run down the stairs before anyone could say a word.
But as soon as you both locked eyes, Mingyu raised his brow, but not in a mocking sense. It was as if … he expected you to be here. He sighed, leaning against the door, and without looking back, he called out, “Wonwoo! You got a visitor.”
Your eyes went wide, and then Mingyu was pushing past you, leaving the door open and muttering, “Good luck.” He was rushing down the stairs two at a time before you could even say a word back. But then you were seeing him, and you wondered if it had always been this hard to breathe around him.
Your fingers played absentmindedly as you both stared at each other. His glasses were slipping down his nose, but he made no move to fix them. His own hand was too busy dropping the controller that had been in his grip, now clattering to the floor. His hair was messed up and he was wearing his favorite comfy sweatsuit, and you … you were put together, as always. Your hair unwashed, but pulled up in a ponytail, and wearing that cardigan he liked so much on you. If he wasn’t so hurt, just the sight of you would have him on his knees right now, begging to have you.
He had to turn around and walk away. If he didn’t right now, he’d just –
“Wait,” you said, walking in and closing the door when he spun away. “Please, don’t. I –”
“What could you possibly say?” He snapped, facing you once again. You had never heard his voice at this octave before, never seen so much distress on his face. “I thought we knew each other well enough that you wouldn’t cut me off out of nowhere. As if I’m just some guy you met at a bar last weekend.”
Your mouth opened, and then closed.
“Do you … do you even understand how worried I was about you?” He ran a hand through his hair, voice cracking for the first time in forever. You took a step closer to him. “You weren’t answering me and I just … my head went to the worst. I thought Mingyu was gonna kill me the next time I mentioned your name. And then, to see you at work and realizing that you were actually just ghosting me was a fucking punch to the gut. I didn’t get it. I still don’t get it. But I’m so pissed at you for hurting my feelings that I’m not even sure if I wanna know.”
“Wonwoo –” You started.
“Please, don’t say my name like that,” he sighed and pinched his nose. “I realize that you came all this way to finally break the news to me, but I’m good. It’s very obvious to me now that you don’t like me as much as I like you, and to save us the pity party, let me get you home –” He reached for his wallet to grab some cash for your next taxi.
But you interrupted before he could finish.
“I love you.”
He paused, looking up and making sure he heard you right. “What?”
“I’m in love with you,” you said it again, and it felt so freeing to have this weight lifted off your shoulders. You moved closer, now standing a foot away, but refusing to touch him for your own good. “And I’m not just telling you that as an excuse. Ignoring you was cruel and I can never forgive myself for hurting you. I just … when I realized how deep my feelings for you were …” Your throat closed up, as if your body was acting on instinct, preventing you from being vulnerable with him.
Wonwoo closed the distance. “Hey,” he whispered, tucking a hair behind your ear. “I’m right here with you.”
His voice was so reassuring – as always – opening you up like a blooming flower. And suddenly, your mouth didn’t feel so dry anymore and your nails stopped making crescent-shaped indents in your palm.
“I got scared,” you confessed, your gaze locked on his. “And I ran away, because that was the easiest thing to do. I thought ignoring you would be best for both of us, and I stubbornly didn’t want to hear your opinion on any of this. What I did was wrong and I … I hate myself when I do stuff like this to people I care about.”
Tears pricked at the corner of your eyes, but he wiped them with his thumb before they could fall. You sniffled, noticing the hurt in his eyes had faded, replaced only by adoration. Your lips pursed as you searched his gaze.
“I’ve just … never allowed anyone to open me up like this. I’ve never given my feelings to someone and let them care for me.” You blinked, your eyes rimmed red. “I’ve hardly been able to comprehend my own feelings because I’ve been scared shitless of them in the first place. But I can’t … I can’t justify pushing you away anymore. Because I love you. I don’t like being alone anymore and all I ever want to do is see you. Sometimes I’m afraid if I stop holding you, you’ll disappear. You do so much for me; you literally fix something on my computer everyday. I think if I let you go right now, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life, and I –”
Wonwoo cut you off by pressing his lips to yours. You couldn’t remember the last time he kissed you like this: so gently with his palm cupping your jaw. You felt yourself relax when he slipped an arm around your waist, pulling you flush against him. His tongue licked into your mouth, sighing with relief when the familiar taste of you entered his orbit again. The taste of coffee and peppermint gum and the peanut butter and jelly you definitely had for lunch today. It was everything he loved about you, and he smiled into the kiss.
When he finally pulled away, he said, “Sorry, I interrupted your monologue.”
“It’s okay. Someone needed to before I got into the Hamlet soliloquy I prepared.”
He chuckled, grinning from ear to ear, and just that had a blush creeping to your cheeks. “I forgive you,” he whispered, leaning back in to ghost his lips all over your face. Your warm breath fanned his mouth. “Just don’t do that again. I know I don’t show it very often, but I’m secretly very …” He smiled softer this time, pecking just slightly on the corner of your mouth. “Sensitive.”
Your fingers hooked into the waistband of his sweatpants, wanting him all the more closer. “I know. I promise.” You brushed your nose over his. “If I ever ignore you for even a couple hours, you have full permission to annoy me on Slack.”
Wonwoo had to cover his mouth from letting out the loudest laugh possible, but it made you feel all the better to see him happy. You could spend forever seeing him this happy. You got up on your tiptoes just to stare at him more, to press yourself closer and feel his grin against your cheek.
But he was holding your face now, sighing down at you with a smile that almost made you swoon. “For the record,” he replied, “I love you too.”
#my fics#fic: slacking off#goldenhourology#svthub#the k-fic collection#ksmutsociety#diamond life network#wonwoo#jeon wonwoo#wonwoo smut#jeon wonwoo smut#wonwoo x reader smut#wonwoo x reader#seventeen fanfic#svt fanfic#seventeen smut#svt smut#svt x reader#svt#seventeen#svt wonwoo#seventeen wonwoo#svt fluff#wonwoo fluff#wonwoo angst#svt angst
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His Mother's Sister

pairing | aemond x aunt!reader word count | 4.7k words summary | aemond becomes instantly captivated by his alluring and enigmatic aunt upon her arrival in King’s Landing, his fascination growing into a consuming obsession. one night, he sneaks into her chambers intending to claim her, only to find himself ensnared and wholly claimed by her instead. tags | 18+ MDNI, smut, unprotected sex, obsession, incest, oral (f), aemond being a simp, aemond being obsessed, older woman/younger man, reader is in her early 30s a/n | haven't written smut in a while, so here's my smut piece before I continue with my normal angst and fluff
likes, comments and reblogs are much appreciated ✨
𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
“I have summoned your sister to King’s Landing.”
Aemond’s attention sharpened, his gaze lingering on his mother’s face as Otto spoke. He watched as the blood seemed to drain from her cheeks, her knuckles whitening as she gripped the edge of the table.
“For what purpose?” Alicent’s voice held a strained note, attempting to maintain a composure that clearly wavered.
Aegon, lounging at the head of the table, raised his head, intrigued. A faint smirk tugged at his lips, eyes flicking between his mother and grandsire.
“Marq Ambrose commands one of the most powerful armies in the Reach,” Otto stated with an offhand shrug, his eyes giving nothing away.
“And he would serve us best by keeping that power in the Reach, where it may be summoned at need,” Alicent interjected, her tone unyielding, her eyes locked on Otto’s. There was no mistaking the tension in her voice, a chill that crept through the words.
Aemond’s brow furrowed slightly as he observed his mother. His aunt had always been something of a mystery—whispered about in brief conversations that faded when he entered the room. A few years after his birth, she had been wedded to Lord Ambrose of the Reach, her presence a vague shadow on his life, a name he had heard only in passing. And now, with her impending arrival, he sensed a thread of something forbidden—a story that remained carefully locked away, just out of reach.
Aegon chuckled, breaking the taut silence. “Let Lord Ambrose come, then, if he so wishes to make merry in our halls. He is but my uncle by marriage; surely, we ought to welcome such kin to the capital.” His gaze gleamed as he spoke, and his smile widened. “And I would be most pleased to meet my aunt, at last.”
But Aemond’s mind lingered elsewhere. His mother’s discomfort stirred his curiosity, yes—but something deeper, a whisper of anticipation he could scarcely name, took root.
A week had passed since that conversation, and now the family gathered in the throne room, awaiting Lord Ambrose’s arrival. Aegon sat with careless authority upon the Iron Throne, his gaze sharp with the amusement of expectation, while the rest of them stood beneath the shadow of the dais.
The heavy oak doors creaked open, and a knight’s voice rang out through the hall. “May I present Lord Marq Ambrose and his Lady Wife.”
A stocky figure stepped forward, his hair streaked with white and black, his girth almost comical in its fullness. Aemond cast but a cursory glance at the man, unimpressed by this swollen lord from the Reach, before his gaze shifted past him.
And then, Aemond stilled. His eye widened, his brows lifting as he fought to contain his reaction. His heart gave an unbidden jolt, nearly betraying him. If he had chanced a glance at Aegon, he would have seen his brother’s mouth agape, struck silent.
Beside Lord Ambrose stood his lady—a woman of such beauty that she seemed almost ethereal in her presence, like some creature of starlight veiled in fine silks. You could have been Lord Ambrose’s granddaughter, and yet here you were, his lawful wife. Aemond’s mind spun.
From what he understood, this aunt of his was five summers younger than his mother, yet you bore not a trace of age. Your beauty held a captivating allure, tempered with a regal composure that only added to your mystique. You appeared no older than five-and-twenty, though your presence held the calm authority of a queen.
"Lord and Lady Ambrose," Aegon declared with a broad grin as he rose from the Iron Throne and descended the dais, his eyes gleaming with curiosity. "Welcome."
Lord Ambrose, with a thick and lumbering step, inclined his head and spoke in a voice as stout as his frame. “We thank you for your welcome, Your Grace, and pledge our loyalty to the one true king.”
Aegon waved a dismissive hand, barely seeming to heed the man’s words. “Yes, yes, the crown is grateful for your loyalty and your… soldiers,” he said, his tone absent, as though the promise of men-at-arms meant little to him in the face of his aunt.
Then Aegon turned his attention to you, his expression shifting to one of eager charm. He stepped closer and took your hand, lifting it to his lips. "My aunt," he said, his voice thick with pleasure, “it is an honor to finally make your acquaintance.” He kissed your hand, his gaze lingering on you as he released it.
Your lips curled into a slight, knowing smile, your sharp eyes gleaming with a trace of amusement as though you found the entire display mildly amusing. “The honor is mine, my king,” you replied, your voice soft but rich, laced with an elegance and confidence that defied your role as the wife of a lesser lord.
Aemond, standing nearby, felt his pulse quicken at the sound of your voice. It was smooth, sultry, and held an unspoken promise, a warmth that washed over him and stirred something deep within. His gaze lingered on her, captivated, as if drawn to some unnameable force.
Otto cleared his throat, a subtle warning in his gaze as he stepped forward, sensing the direction of Aegon’s attentions. He inclined his head politely. “Lord Ambrose,” he greeted, then turned to the lady beside him, his tone softening. “Daughter.”
Aemond watched with surprise as she stepped away from Lord Ambrose without hesitation, her face alight with joy. “Father!” she exclaimed, her voice warm and bright. She crossed the floor with graceful steps, her skirts sweeping behind her as she embraced her father.
Otto’s usually stoic expression softened, his arms enveloping her with an affection rare to see from the Hand of the King. “How I’ve missed you,” he murmured.
Aemond, along with Aegon and Helaena, exchanged startled glances, astonished by the depth of feeling Otto revealed.
She broke away, casting a radiant smile at Otto before her gaze shifted, and she found Alicent. Aemond watched as his mother’s expression flickered, caught between awkwardness and reluctance, her shoulders tense. But his aunt moved toward her with the same confident warmth. “Sister,” she greeted, wrapping her arms around Alicent in a sincere embrace.
Alicent seemed to steel herself, managing a strained smile as she endured the hug. When they pulled apart, her expression remained stiff as she forced a cordial tone. “Sister,” she said carefully, “you look… as though no time has passed at all.”
The amusement in your eyes deepened, a subtle spark of mischief that curled your lips into a nearly smug smile. “And yet,” you replied, voice gentle but pointed, “it seems that time has left its mark on you."
The words were soft, yet they carried an edge that struck the air between them. Alicent’s face faltered, her polite mask slipping for an instant. Aemond watched the exchange, captivated by the intricate web of tensions and histories unfolding before him. He had thought his mother impervious, yet here she was, visibly discomforted under the gaze of her younger sister.
“Well,” Aegon’s voice broke in, strangely lively, “this calls for a celebration.” He clapped his hands, grinning widely. “A family supper, to welcome Lord… and Lady Ambrose to King’s Landing.” He glanced between his aunt and mother with a glint in his eye, as if relishing the simmering tension.
Aemond glanced toward his aunt, your eyes alight with a confidence that drew him in, entangled with memories he could only guess at. You seemed utterly unperturbed by the uneasy reception, holding yourself with an assurance that only deepened the fascination you stirred within him.
The supper was, in truth, a strained affair. Lord Ambrose quickly drank himself into a state of merriment, his voice growing louder with each goblet of wine he downed. He boasted endlessly of Ambrosia, their ancestral castle in the Reach, extolling the grandeur of its halls, the strength of its walls, and the might of his armies.
It was painfully clear that neither Aegon nor Otto paid him much heed; Aegon’s eyes glazed over with feigned interest, while Otto offered only the occasional nod, his mind elsewhere.
Aegon, however, deftly steered the conversation back to you at every opportunity. “But tell us, Aunt,” he said with a sly smile, “what tales do you bring from the Reach? Surely there are more interesting things than castle stones and soldiers.”
Across the table, Aemond found his brother’s persistent attempts at flirtation grating, yet he could not fault Aegon for giving you the attention. Your voice, like a song in his ear, drew him in each time you spoke, its smooth cadence addictive.
You spoke easily, your words painting scenes of courtly life in the Reach, of feasts and tournaments, your radiant smile outshining your husband’s drunken ramblings. Every eye at the table seemed drawn to you, but none with the quiet intensity of Aemond’s single, focused gaze.
He was captivated by the way you commanded the room, with a poise that cast Lord Ambrose’s bluster into the shadows. And when you looked his way, even for a fleeting moment, he felt as though the world quieted around him.
“And what of you and my mother in your younger days?” Aegon asked, a mischievous, drunken grin on his lips, his words slurring slightly as he leaned forward in his chair.
Alicent shot him a pointed look, her expression tightening as she cleared her throat. “Aegon,” she murmured, her voice gently chastising, “perhaps my sister would appreciate a moment to enjoy her meal.”
But you merely laughed, dismissing her concern with a wave of your hand. “Oh, it’s quite all right, Alicent,” you said warmly. Turning to Aegon, your eyes sparkled with a hint of nostalgia. “You see, in our younger years, your mother could barely stand to be near me.”
Alicent’s discomfort grew visible as she shifted in her seat, her voice soft but strained. “That is not true, sister.”
“Oh, but it is,” you replied with a soft, almost wistful laugh. “Not that I hold it against you, Alicent. I was terribly fond of her then; I looked up to her as one might look to a mother. But every time I tried to spend time with her, she would run off with Princess Rhaenyra, laughing at my expense.”
“Those were mere childish games,” Alicent interjected, her voice taut as she worked to maintain her composure.
“Indeed, they were,” you agreed with an unbothered smile. “Children can be so prone to envy and jealousy. You see,” your tone lightened, yet held a playful undertone as your eyes drifted back to Aegon, “I was often called the ‘Diamond of Oldtown,’ and perhaps such adoration left its mark on dear Alicent.”
The words were spoken with an air of casual jest, yet there was no mistaking the edge beneath them. Aemond watched as Alicent’s mask slipped, her cheeks flushing as she struggled to keep her voice steady. It was clear you were savoring Alicent’s discomfort, a faint glimmer of amusement lighting your eyes as they traveled slowly down the length of the table.
And then, your gaze found him.
“And what of you, dear nephew?” you inquired, your voice as smooth as wine poured in darkened halls. “I’ve heard many tales of you in the Reach.”
Aemond felt his heart thud within his chest, a warmth rising unbidden to his face as he fought to maintain his poise. “Tales of what, Aunt?” he asked, his voice low, striving for calm.
A smile curved upon your lips, one that was as inviting as it was knowing. “A great warrior, fierce and unmatched across the Seven Kingdoms. The rider of Vhagar, queen of all dragons,” you murmured, your words laced with a hint of admiration.
“That’s all, my lady,” Aemond replied softly, his gaze never wavering from yours.
And in return, you tilted your head ever so slightly, an amused glint in your eyes as though you were looking beyond the surface, into the very marrow of him. It was a gaze both alluring and unsettling, one that sent a shiver down his spine.
Before you could speak again, however, your husband’s voice cut through the charged silence. His tone was slurred and irritated, clearly displeased by the lack of attention on him as he clumsily launched into yet another tale of his supposed valor. Aemond noted how you sighed softly, a look of resignation crossing your features as you turned your gaze away from him.
But then, as though unable to resist, your eyes drifted back to Aemond. You held his gaze for a heartbeat longer than propriety allowed and, with a barely concealed smirk, you winked.
Aemond’s heart skipped a beat, his lone eye widening ever so slightly as he blinked, wondering if he had imagined it. He looked back, only to find you now watching your husband with a look of faint distaste, a grimace twisting your otherwise perfect features. It was a small, subtle gesture, but one that spoke volumes, and Aemond felt a surge of something dark and possessive stirring within him.
In that moment, he realized that this supper was not simply an introduction; it was an invitation, a challenge, and a temptation all at once.
These thoughts lingered long after, spiraling in his mind with an intensity he couldn’t quiet. Later, as he passed through the halls, he overheard a quiet murmur from a maid: Lord and Lady Ambrose had chosen to sleep in separate chambers. Aemond’s pulse quickened.
The knowledge seemed a silent invitation, a doorway left just ajar. He recalled the way you had spoken to him, your voice holding layers meant only for him. The look in your eyes—hungry, as though you sought to devour his very soul—left him craving to be consumed by that gaze again. No, this was not his imagination. He was certain of it.
And it was this certainty that drove him through the darkened halls of the Red Keep, slipping past drowsy guards, cloaked in shadow, his steps muffled by the silence of the sleeping castle.
When he reached your door, he eased it open, careful to make no sound, and stepped inside with the stealth of a shadow. Yet he halted at once, caught off guard by the sight that greeted him.
There you sat, reclining on a velvet chaise, a goblet of deep red wine in hand, eyes cast down at a leather-bound book resting in your lap. The faint candlelight painted your skin in warm gold, and your attire—a red nightgown, translucent and clinging to every curve—left little hidden, casting a spell of allure around you.
Aemond’s throat tightened as he took in the sight, the image searing itself into his mind. But the quiet gulp betrayed him, and your gaze lifted, pinning him where he stood.
“Your Highness,” you murmured, your voice laced with a seductive warmth. “What a surprise.” The knowing smile on your lips told him this was no surprise at all.
Feeling the weight of your gaze, he steeled himself, adopting the guise of confidence. “I could not find sleep, my lady,” he replied, his voice steady. “And it would appear you are in the same predicament.”
You set down your goblet and closed the book in your lap, your every movement deliberate. Rising from your seat, you let the robe slide from your shoulders, the fabric pooling at your feet. “You know,” you murmured, teasingly, “it is most improper for a man to visit a married woman at such an hour.”
Aemond took a step closer, his gaze never leaving you. “But you are my aunt—my family.”
A small, knowing laugh escaped your lips as you slipped past him, your arm brushing his, a soft touch that sent a jolt through him. He closed his eye briefly, savoring the warmth, and when he opened it again, you had moved toward the bed, your smile one of invitation.
“The Targaryens are known for their peculiar customs when it comes to family.” You glanced back at him with an amused, daring gleam in your eye. “Tell me, what is it that you desire?”
He took another step forward, drawn like a moth to flame. “I think you know what I desire.”
“And if I were to say yes,” you purred, sitting upon the edge of the bed, “what would you do?”
He moved closer, his voice low with reverence. “I would do whatever you asked of me.”
Your lips curled, eyes glinting with a barely concealed command. “Then kneel for me,” you whispered.
For a brief moment, his brow furrowed, but any hesitation vanished. He lowered himself to his knees before you, his head tilted upward, gaze reverent. “As you wish, my lady.”
You studied him, a look of satisfaction crossing your face as you gathered your skirts, parting your legs with a languid grace. Tilting your chin, you gave a single, soft nod. “Then go on, my sweet prince,” you murmured, your voice a quiet command, heavy with promise.
He hesitated for a moment, then slowly leaned forward, pressing a tender kiss to your inner thigh. His hands came to rest on your hips as he began to place soft kisses along your skin, working his way higher.
When he finally reached the apex of your thighs, he paused, looking up at you, his eye hooded.
"Are you certain about this, Aunt?" Despite his words, his body language betrayed his eagerness - his breathing quickened and his fingers tightened their grip on your hips ever so slightly.
You let out a soft moan as he kissed your thighs, your fingers tangled in his hair, urging him on, "Yes I am certain, now continue before I change my mind."
With a low growl, he surged forward, burying his face between your thighs. He wasted no time in finding your sensitive bud with his tongue, flicking and circling it expertly.
One hand slid up to cup your breast through your thin nightgown, kneading the soft flesh as he continued his ministrations below. He alternated between long, slow licks and quick flicks of his tongue, gauging your reactions to find what felt best.
The other hand gripped your hip more firmly, holding you in place as he devoured you like a starving man at a feast. Wet sounds filled the room as he worked tirelessly to bring you pleasure, lost in the taste and scent of your arousal. Your back arched as he licked your cunt, a loud moan escaped your lips, "Oh gods, yes."
Your fingers tightened in his hair, as you bucked your hips against his face, seeking more of his skilled touch, "Yes, feast on me."
Spurred on by your moans and the encouragement in your voice, Aemond redoubled his efforts. He sealed his lips around your bud and sucked hard, his tongue lashing over the sensitive nub in rapid circles.
Two fingers slid deep inside your slick heat, curling to stroke along your inner walls as they thrusted in and out. The obscene wet sounds of his fingers pumping into your dripping core mingled with your increasingly desperate cries of pleasure.
Aemond could feel you tensing and shuddering beneath his touch, teetering on the brink of release. He doubled down, sucking harder and fucking you faster with his fingers, determined to push you over the edge into blissful oblivion.
Your orgasm hit you like a tidal wave, screaming out in ecstasy as your body shook violently, juices gushing out and soaking his face, "Oh fuck! Aemond!"
You clutched at his head, grinding your cunt against his mouth as you rode out the waves of pleasure, your skin glistening with sweat, "Don't you dare stop until I tell you to!"
Feeling your body quake and spasm around his invading fingers, Aemond drank in every drop of your sweet release, lapping at your pulsing sex greedily. He prolonged your climax with relentless strokes of his tongue, coaxing out every last tremor of pleasure.
Only when your spasms subsided does he finally pull back, his chin dripping with your essence. He gazed up at you with a triumphant, almost feral glint in his eye, his own arousal straining against the confines of his breeches, "Have I pleased you, Aunt?"
"Yes, yes you have," you said breathlessly.
Without a word, he rose to his feet and began to strip off his clothes, revealing a lean, muscular physique honed by years of training. His cock sprang free, thick and flushed with blood, the tip already glistening with pre-cum.
"You have such a pretty cock, nephew," you said, taking in the sight of him, as your hand reached out for his cock.
Aemond's breath hitched as your hand wrapped around his throbbing length, his hips instinctively bucking into the touch. He watched, transfixed, as your fingers traced the ridged veins and delicate skin, marveling at how small yet firm your hand looked compared to his engorged member.
"It's yours," he rasped, his voice strained with need. "Do whatever you want with it."
He stepped closer, pressing the heavy weight of his erection against your palm, the heat of his skin seeping into your touch. Leaning down, he captured your lips in a hungry kiss, his tongue delving deep to tangle with yours as he grinded against you.
You broke the kiss, panting heavily, as you pulled him onto the bed. Then you straddled him, rubbing your dripping cunt along his cock, coating it with your juices, "I've never ridden a dragon before. Tell me, do you want me to claim you?"
Aemond's single eye blazed with lust and something deeper, darker, as he gazed up at you poised above him. His chest heaved with ragged breaths, the muscles flexing beneath his pale skin.
"Yes, Aunt," he growled, his voice thick with desire. "Claim me. Make me yours."
His hands came up to grasp your hips, guiding you to position yourself over his straining cock. His head nudged at your entrance, smearing your slickness across it.
"Do it," he urged, his gaze intense and unblinking. "Take me deep."
So slowly you sank down onto his cock, letting out a loud moan as you stretched around his girth. You took him inch by delicious inch until you were fully seated on him, "Fuck, your cock was made for my cunt."
Aemond threw his head back with a guttural groan as you sheathed him completely, your tight heat enveloping his throbbing length. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, nipping and sucking at the tender skin as he reveled in the feeling of being utterly filled in you.
"So tight," he panted against your throat.
His hands squeezed your hips, holding you steady as he began to thrust up into you, meeting each downward plunge of your own hips. The bed creaked beneath you, the sound mingling with your mingled moans of pleasure. And feeling a tinge of frustration, his hands met the top of your nightgown as he pulled hard, ripping it in half completely, making you gasp.
You rode him hard and fast, your breasts bouncing with each powerful thrust. the sound of skin slapping against skin echoed through the room, mixed with your high pitched moans, "Yes, yes, fuck me harder Aemond!"
Aemond leaned forward, sucking on your breast as if he was a babe desperately seeking milk. He suckled greedily at your breast, his tongue swirling around the hardened peak as he drew the sensitive flesh into his mouth. His hands roamed your curves possessively, one sliding down to grip your ass while the other tweaked and tugged at your neglected nipple.
He met your wild riding with equal fervor, pistoning his hips up to meet your downward thrusts. The force of his movements drove you upward, impaling you again and again on his thick cock. Your cries of ecstasy spurred him on, his own groans of pleasure growing louder and more desperate.
Suddenly, he flipped you over onto your back, looming over you with a predatory gleam in his eye. He pinned your wrists above your head, holding you captive as he pounded into you with renewed vigor, the new angle allowing him to penetrate even deeper.
You wrapped your legs tightly around his waist, locking him in place as you grinded your hips upwards to match his frenzied pace. Your nails dug into his shoulders as you clung to him, urging him on, "Fuck! Right there!"
Aemond let go of your wrists, leaning down to capture your lips in a bruising kiss as he continued to ravage your cunt. He swallowed all your screams and moans, relishing in the taste and feel of you.
"Cum in me aemond! Fill me with your seed!" You screamed into his mouth as another orgasm ripped through you.
The sensation of your inner walls clenching and rippling around him sent Aemond careening over the edge. With a hoarse shout, he buried himself to the hilt and erupted, his hot seed flooding your womb in powerful jets.
"Ahh, gods," he gasped, his body shuddering with the intensity of his climax. He continued to pulse and twitch within you, ensuring every drop is deposited deep inside your welcoming heat.
As the aftershocks subsided, Aemond collapsed onto you, his weight a comforting press against your satiated form. He nuzzled into the crook of your neck, his breath coming in ragged pants as he struggled to regain his composure.
"That was...incredible," he murmured, his voice low and husky with satisfaction. “You are truly remarkable.”
You wrapped your arms around him, holding him close, reveling in the warmth of his body against yours as you both sought to catch your breath. A delicate shiver coursed through you, remnants of your shared ecstasy still fluttering within.
“There, there,” you purred softly, running your fingers through his silken hair, enjoying the feel of his softness against your skin. Aemond lay on your chest, his face buried in the crook of your neck, the intoxicating scent of you mingling with the fading heat of your shared intimacy.
Once Aemond had calmed his breathing, he lifted his head to meet your lips in a searing kiss, his tongue dancing with yours in a fervent exploration, igniting a spark that flickered between you. His hand traveled down your body, the warmth of his touch setting your skin alight.
When his hand paused on your stomach, he broke the kiss, a frown creasing his brow as curiosity flickered in his violet eye. It was well known that you had been wed to Lord Ambrose for fifteen years without bearing a child. Whispers of your barrenness had circulated through the halls of the Red Keep, and Aemond could not suppress the question that hung in the air between you.
"Is it true you are barren?" he asked, his tone laced with concern.
You regarded him with a playful smirk, the corners of your lips lifting. “No,” you murmured softly, your fingers gently caressing his long silver hair.
There was amusement in your voice, and as you laughed lightly, the sound was like music in the dimly lit chamber. “Do you truly think I had ever wished to be filled with a child by that fat cunt?”
Aemond’s single violet eye widened in surprise at your boldness. You continued, your tone shifting to one of quiet confidence. “Each time I’ve lain with him, I’ve taken moon tea the morning after.”
You leaned closer, your hand reaching out to caress his cheek with a gentle, deliberate stroke. Your fingers traced the sharp line of his jaw, igniting a spark that sent a wave of absolute pleasure down Aemond's spine. “Yet I don’t think I’d mind bearing your child.”
The very thought of your bearing his child sent shivers of exhilaration coursing through him. The idea that at this very moment, his seed might have taken root within you filled him with a sense of possessiveness that was both intoxicating and primal. In that instant, it became clear: you were his, and he was yours, bound together by an unspoken promise.
Aemond’s mind raced with possibilities. He would need to find a way to rid you of Lord Ambrose, but that task seemed deceptively simple in the face of what awaited him. Once the obstacle was removed, he would claim you as his wife, securing a future that felt destined.
You were made for him, and in his heart, he knew you had been waiting all this time—patiently, silently—for him to come to you.
HOPE YOU ENJOYED!
#aemond targaryen x reader#house of the dragon#aemond targaryen#aemond x reader#hotd fanfic#hotd aemond#aemond one eye#hotd#aemond x you#aemond targaryen smut#aemond targaryen imagine
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Perfect plan -1-
Pairing: Namjoon x f.reader Genre: friends to lovers, friends with benefits? (But the benefit is a baby); crack, a smidge of angst, smut, fluff, happy ending. Rating: explicit. Minors do not interact. Warnings: mentions of cheating and ‘being the other woman’ (past relationship), reader works at a hospital, Namjoon is just an absolute sweetheart in this, cursing, multiple sex scenes, dirty talking, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering, just a smidge of size kink, unprotected sex, creampie, intensive orgasms, Namjoon tells you to “Relax, woman” before eating you out, lovemaking, and a quick scene of pregananat sex. Word count: somewhere around 15k. Author's note: You know there is this idea travelling around that writers write what they need to hear? Apparently, I need Namjoon to tell me it’s okay if I don’t have it all figured out. Thank you @callmenoona25 for all your help once again. You’re the sweetest! ✨ ps. English not first language. Brain dumb sometimes. If you’re still reading this, leave a comment, drop a like, they’re literally the joy of my existence. part 2: here
Confetti was not just decoration; it was a phenomenon. It had a very special way of never truly being vacuumed up. No matter how many times you tried, the colorful bits- pink, blue and gold- always seem to wiggle away and hide comfortably into the far corners of the room as if they had a mind of their own. They would stay there, nestled in the shadows, only to flutter up again whenever you tried to sweep them away.
After the third failed attempt, you let out a frustrated sigh and abandoned the vacuum cleaner. You’d leave that task for the sober version of you tomorrow.
Instead, you started gathering the scattered napkins from the dining table, folding them mindlessly. Your gaze wandered to the half-burned candles that still sat on the table, the melted wax serving as a quiet witness to your little gathering.
29.
“Happy Birthday!” – those words never felt heavier, laden with unfulfilled dreams and the weight of another year gone by without much to show for it. Even the celebration, once full of light and laugher, had left behind just another mess to clean up. The year was over and you were left with the quiet aftermath.
You had always imagined this age differently, or at least, that’s what you told yourself every year. By now, you thought you’d have things figured out. You thought there’d be someone by your side, someone to share the joy of the life you had built.
Little baby prints all over the house. Raising a child, teaching them how to blow out birthday candles and clean up the mess afterwards.
You had always imagined being a mother by now. Maybe that’s what hurt the most- how the years seemed to slip by without any sign of the family you’ve dreamed of. The house full of laughter, a partner to help you navigate the messes and milestones.
But instead, you found yourself alone. Alone in a big beautiful house, holding a top position as an administrator at a private hospital. But alone.
You threw away the last of the napkins and pushed your way through the clutter on the dining table, your mind still heavy with the weight of the thought that had followed your around since the last of the guests had left. The candles sat atop the garbage pile when you walked towards the kitchen.
The house felt quieter now, almost too quiet, as if it was holding its breath since the celebration had ended.
When you entered the kitchen, the hum of the dishwasher broke the silence. You hadn’t expected to find anyone still here, but here he was- Namjoon, your friend, still loading dishes with the same quiet focus he’d had all evening.
You two met back in your last year at college, when you were both striving to become more than just another student. You butted heads a few times, competing for the opening position of Teacher Assistant, only for the teacher to completely compromise the project by offering the job to his very own son.
Either way, you walked away with a new friend. (The enemy of my enemy?) You were drawn to his passion, his drive, and his unwavering belief in himself. Turned out the two of you also made a hell of a team when it came to it, because you managed to get the job done, despite the professor’s questionable decisions. You’d stayed late countless nights in the library, hashing out ideas, studying together, even venting your frustration in between textbooks. Namjoon had the uncanny ability to make even the most tedious projects feel worthwhile, and you couldn’t help but admire the way he could turn anything into an opportunity for growth. It was contagious, his unwavering belief that everything- every setback, every challenge, was just another chance to prove yourself.
You’d both laughed about it afterwards, the way the professor’s son had been handed the job without so much as a second though, while you and Namjoon had essentially worked the entire course in the shadows. But it didn’t matter in the end. What you had created, together, was far more valuable than the title ever could’ve given you.
The sound of glassware clinking together was oddly soothing, and for a moment you just watched him.
He was dressed in a casual cream turtleneck that beautifully highlighted his broad chest, paired with olive-green slacks. The golden framed glasses perched on his nose adding a little touch of elegance, perfectly tying the outfit together. He seemed relaxed, at large within the confines of your apartment.
“Still here?”
Namjoon glanced over his shoulder, flashing you a tired but warm smile, “You thought I’d leave you to clean all this on your own?”
You lean slightly against the counter, suddenly feeling restricted by the tight dress you wore, watching him work. It was such a kind gesture, but something about it made you feel even more isolated.
“I could’ve handled it,”
“I know you could,” he said, turning back to the sink, “But I wanted to help.”
There was something about him that made you feel seen, even in moments like these, when you didn’t want to be. Almost like he wasn’t just cleaning up your party mess; he was cleaning your life in some way too. The laughter had faded hours ago, and now it was just the two of you- no more distractions, no more Taehyung and Jungkook cracking jokes, no more celebrating. Just the quiet hum of the dishwasher and the soft clink of plates. Just still life.
You sigh and pull out a chair to sit down at the small breakfast nook “I just feel like… I’m stuck, you know?”
The sparkling champagne made you tongue loose. Feeling vulnerable and raw, you quietly searched his eyes. “Like, I thought by now I’d have it all figured out- where I’m supposed to be, what I’m supposed to be doing. I just thought I’d have more… more something.”
Namjoon set the plate down with a soft clink and turned towards you, his gaze steady but gentle. He wiped his hands on a dish towel, and for the first time that evening, he let the silence hang between you, as if giving you space to let the words settle before responding.
“You know,” he began, his voice low, “I think everyone feels that way sometimes. That sense of… not being where you thought you’d be. But I also think you’re more than what you’re giving yourself credit for.” He paused, then leaned against the counter, meeting your eyes in that way he always did- like he was truly seeing you, not just the person in front of him, but the one beneath the surface.
You shrugged, a half-smile pulling at the corners of your lips, but it didn’t reach your eyes. “I just-” You sighed. “I need to stop drinking.”
Namjoon studied you for a moment, his eyes softening as if weighing your words. He didn’t rush to fill the silence with advice or reassurances. Instead, he simply watched, letting the moment hang in the air, even as it thickened with unspoken words.
Finally, after a small eternity, he spoke.
“It’s okay not to have it all figured out.” He paused for a moment “Life isn’t a straight line. I know you like to plan every little detail of it, but sometimes, it’s just not how it works out. You can’t just arrive somewhere and expect it to be perfect.”
You wanted to laugh, to dismiss his words as is you didn’t know already. But something in the way he said it made it feel real. Like he wasn’t just offering empty comfort, but speaking form a place of understanding.
“And maybe you’re not where you thought you’d be. But that doesn’t mean you’re lost.” Namjoon set the tea towel down with quiet precision, then met your gaze once more, his smile faint but steady. “I think... maybe we’re all just figuring it out as we go. Some of us more than others.”
You wanted to say something, wanted to argue, but the weight of his words settled over you, a gentle blanket you didn’t know you needed.
“C’mon, you’re tired. Let’s get you to bed.” The softness of his tone caught you off guard, tugging at something inside of you. His words didn’t come with expectations, didn’t demand anything from you.
You opened your mouth to respond, but nothing came out. Instead, you simply nodded, feeling a heaviness settle over you that was both familiar and strange. You stood up slowly, legs still a little unsteady from the alcohol, and made your way to the bedroom, Namjoon following quietly behind you.
You didn’t speak as you reached the doorway. There was nothing to say, not really. So instead, you turned around and wrapped yourself around his body, pulling him in a tight hug.
“Thank you Joonie.”
Namjoon chuckled, squeezing you tightly before whispering “Anytime love.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The fluorescent lights of the 7/11 hummed overhead, as you stood in the middle of an aisle, heart melting into a puddle as you cooed over a chubby-cheeked baby sprawled across a shopping card. All bundled up in a puppy themed onesie, the little one giggled as he reached for a colorful toy, and you couldn’t help but mimic his joyous sounds.
You watched with admiration as the mother, a confident woman in yoga pants (and a vomit-stained shirt), gently tickled the baby’s round face, eliciting a fit of giggles.
Namjoon, as usual, was talking as he dropped something into your shopping cart, not that you were paying him any attention. Not when the baby’s eyes caught your gaze, his smile widening as he cooed at you.
“God Joon, I want one too.”
Namjoon, ever the pragmatist, didn’t miss a beat. “Well, I can get you one, they’re on sale.”
His voice was light, casual, the way he spoke when he didn’t take your thoughts too seriously. You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift in conversation.
“What are you talking about?”
“The crackers?” he said, glancing at you, his brow furrowed in confusion as he held a box of crackers in his hand, examining the label as though the fine print held some secret to the universe. “What are you talking about?”
You stared at him for a second, still caught up in the midst of your daydream, before laughing softly.
“The baby, Namjoon.”
“Ah-” he paused, looking back at the baby boy. “I don’t think they sell those here,” he chuckled, throwing a sly glance your way. “But if you want, I can distract the mother, and you make a run for the exit with the baby.”
You laughed at the absurdity of it, shooting him a playful glare, knowing where his teasing would lead.
“Don’t say that! You’ll get us kicked out." You scold with a playful grin.
Namjoon just shrugged, as if the thought didn’t bother him, the teasing glint in his eyes only making you smile wider. You pushed your cart towards the checkout line, the weight of it heavier now.
It’s been a few weeks since you had that moment of weakness, but the ache still lingered, quietly tucked away in the mundane day-to-day distractions. You’d buried the feelings under careful planning, an extra dose of work, and fleeting nights out with friends. But the longing never quite went away.
Instead, it had grown far beyond a mere ‘baby fever’. It was a full-blown malady by now.
Namjoon, however, was a constant, a comforting presence amidst the chaos of your thoughts. And tonight, it was no different, even in the middle of a basic errand run to 7/11. He was there, filling the space with his usual teasing and lighthearted energy, offering a sense of normalcy you didn’t even realize you missed.
“But seriously, I think you’d make a wonderful mother.” Behind you, Namjoon continued to toss items into the cart- bags of chips, cans of soda, candy bars- anything within his reach as he dropped one of the biggest compliments you’ve gotten in the past few years.
It hit you like a soft wave, unexpected, yet somehow exactly what you needed to hear. You paused, a bag of cereal halfway to your cart, processing his words. The motions of the store continued around you- people chatting, the hum of a checkout line in the distance, the baby’s giggles- but for a minute, they all slowed, and it was just the two of you in that fluorescent-lit aisle.
You turn slightly, trying to keep the heat from rising to your cheeks “You think so?”
Namjoon, oblivious to the shift in your mood, continued picking through the shelves, tossing things in your cart with an almost absentminded rhythm “I do.” He said, his voice easy and sincere as it always was with you
“You’re nurturing, you know? And patient. You make people feel safe, like they can just… be themselves around you.” He smiled “And you’re the mother of the friend group.”
He was focused on a big bottle of orange juice when he tacked on “You’d be amazing at it.”
The way he spoke made it sound so simple. But to you, it felt anything but simple. A rush of conflict swirled in your mind.
“Too bad my dating life is so stale,” you grumble, snapping him out of his obsession.
Your past experiences hadn’t been exactly pleasant. From really weird alpha-sigma-dudes trying to convince you that your worth as a woman has declined since you passed the age of 25, to insecure men that felt intimidated by your position in the working field, to just bad timing in general- it was all just… complicated.
The cherry on top was your last relationship. You felt the bitterness creep back into your chest as you thought about him- the doctor. The one who had lied to you for over two years. Even now, the memories felt like a stab straight to your ribs. Like a snake squeezing your heart into nothingness. You gave him everything, trusted him with your heart, only to have it shattered in the cruelest way. You could still remember the disbelief in your voice when you had to confront him.
“God, how did I miss that?” You murmured underneath your breath, your grip tightening around the cart handle.
Namjoon, who had been rifling through the cart, didn’t seem to notice the dark cloud that settled over you.
“Stale? Nah, you’re daring life’s just on pause.” He said, completely unaware of how much his words stung.
“The only man I wanted to start a family with turned out to be married!” You snap. The words slipped out before you could stop them, sharp and bitter. You could feel the heat rise to your chest as the frustration spilled over, the old wound reopening with an ache. Namjoon froze mid-motion, his hand still hovering over a bag of something. The silence that followed was heavy, and you immediately regretted it.
But Namjoon, ever the perceptive one, quickly managed to draw you back in.
“That dick?” he huffed “Its better you found out early on. I can’t bear the idea of you having asshole-babies.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at Namjoon’s lighthearted response, despite the lasting burn. The absurdity of ‘asshole-babies’, paired with the sincerity of his tone, almost made the bitterness dissolve. The tension in your chest shifting slightly.
He dropped the bag back into your cart and met your eyes. “You deserve someone who treats you right, who sees all the amazing things you are. You don’t need to settle for anything less.”
You nodded slowly, the weight of his words sinking in. It was comforting to hear him speak like that, as if he believed in you more than you sometimes believed in yourself.
“Thank you love,” you said softly, your smile genuine but still fragile.
He flashed a grin, nudging you with his elbow as he walked along you towards the checkout.
“Now, what the fuck did you buy? Why are there three bottles of ketchup here?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Okay! I have decided.” You announce suddenly, drawing the attention of everyone at the small table to you. The murmur of laughter and clicking of glasses fades into the background, and a bubble of anticipation surrounds your little booth.
The bar is buzzing with life; particularly crowded for a Thursday evening, yet, even among the crowded mess, Jungkook still somehow managed to secure a secluded little nook for your rag-tag group of four.
You glanced around the dimly lit room, where the flickering neon lights casted playful shadows along the walls- a slight twinge of courage envelops you as the warmth of the alcohol teases your senses, coloring your cheeks bright red.
Namjoon’s brow rises, and he takes a contemplative sip from his tall glass of beer, a thoughtful expression dancing across his face. In front of you, Jungkook and Aera are deep into their third glass, laughing at some inside joke only cringey couples would make, oblivious to the rising tension radiating from your suddenly bold proclamation.
“Decided?” Namjoon echoed, setting his glass down, the faintest hint of amusement tugging at the corner of his lips as he watches you.
Aera and Jungkook both turn their attention to you as well. Jungkook leaned back in his seat, a mischievous glint in his eyes, while Aera wiped her lips with the back of her hand, ready for whatever random revelation you were about to drop.
“I’m going to have a baby by myself!”
The words hung in the air for a long moment, as though the entire bar had suddenly gone still. Your proclamation floating quietly through the air before crashing and tumbling on the small table between you.
Namjoon blinked, his beer halfway to his mouth, while Aera and Jungkook both froze mid-laugh, their faces a reflection of disbelief and curiosity.
“What?” Jungkook was the first to speak, his voice completely drowning in confusion.
“I already set up a college saving’s account, and I got a head start on the nursery.” You reached for a napkin, just so your fingers have something to do. “The contractor is coming over this weekend to look at the room.” You looked up to gauge their reaction, but when no one spoke, you continued “I mean, I don’t even use the at-home office. It’s perfect.”
Leaning back into the seat, you plant your elbows on the table, the rough surface grounding you as the weight of your declaration settles heavy in the air.
“Wait, wait,” Aera says after regaining her composure, her eyes slightly narrowing with skepticism. “You’re seriously saying you want to become a single parent? Just like that?”
“She’s serious.” Namjoon cuts in, setting his now-empty beer glass down on the table.
He nursed that drink for the past hours only to finish it with one long sip?
“Trust me, this isn’t a rushed decision. She’s been toying with the idea for months.” He mumbled, leaning back into the booth.
“Yeah,” you nod confidently “The kindergarten right down the block from me has an afternoon group. So, after the baby turns three, I can start working again. And until then I should live comfortably with my savings.”
“Noona you can’t!” Jungkook looks terrorized by the thought, the alcohol just as evident on his face as it was on yours. “So what? You’ll just start fucking every Dick, Harry and Joe in town until you get knocked up?”
Under normal circumstances, the youngling would be much more careful with his words around you, but now, with the buzz going on in his head, his desperation seemed to have taken over. His eyes quickly shifting from you to his Hyung, as if pleading Namjoon to back him up.
The atmosphere shifts as Jungkook's words slice through your carefully crafted confidence. Laughter begins to bubble back to life around you, but your own heart has started to race, confusion and boldness swirling together like a cocktail in your stomach. You stare at Jungkook.
“You know that’s not how it works.” You reply, your tone steadier than you feel. An involuntary smile creeps back onto your lips. “It’s not that simple, and I’m not looking for casual hookups. God only knows what messed up genetics those dudes have. And I run a risk of an STD.” You shake your head. “No Kookie, I have a plan.”
You take a deep breath, allowing the faint buzz of the bar to seep into your consciousness again, grounding you while your amusement at Jungkook’s pure shock begins to surface again.
“Besides, the plan isn’t just a plan; it’s a well-thought-out strategy.” You try to encourage him, but he just blinks up at you like a hurt little puppy. “I scheduled an appointment at a fertility clinic.”
“And if the plan fails? What if you’re not ready for the challenges of parenting? It’s not just about the nursery or the savings. Have you thought about the reality of it?”
Deep down, you know that Aera just wants to help, however, her questions rub you slightly the wrong way.
“Of course I have!” You assert, a tad defensively but with sincerity woven into your voice. “I’ve done my research, Aera. What it takes. What I need. There are all sorts of resources out there for single parents. It’s not like I’ll be doing this entirely alone. I have you guys, and I know I can reach out to others too if it gets too tough.”
Jungkook ran an exasperated hand down his face, grasping at straws as he mumbled, “What about your love life? This is such a huge commitment, and you’re just going to push that aside for... A child?”
You appreciate the concern, but something in you quakes at the thought of your future being dictated solely by the prospect of a romantic relationship.
“My love life is already complicated. I don’t want to put my dreams on hold for a partner that might not even come.”
“Namjoon! Say something!” Jungkook pleaded, but the gentle giant just kept on silently studying you.
“Congratulations.” Was the only thing that left his lips after a long moment, making you beam up at him as if you’d just received a gold start on a test.
“See?” you said, your smile widening as you glanced back and forth between them. “Namjoon gets it! Life’s too short to wait around for the perfect moment!”
Aera finally shook her head, a soft smile gracing her lips despite the concern in her eyes. “It’s just, we can’t help but worry for you. What if it’s harder than you think? What if you regret this choice down the line?”
You reach for her hand, squeezing it gently. “That’s the thing Aera. I’m not doing this on a whim. I’ve mapped it out. I’m prepared. I believe I can give my child the love and support they need.” You smile, glancing between Jungkook and Namjoon.
“Fine.” Jungkook relented, leaning back in his seat with a resigned sigh, his hands raised in mock surrender. “I guess if you’re really set on this… just promise you won’t forget about me when you become Super Mom or something.”
Aera rolled her eyes playfully, yet her smile remained as she leaned against his chest “As if you’d let her forget. You’d probably be the most dramatic babysitter ever.”
A ripple of laughter echoed among the three of you, the tension momentarily lifting, only Namjoon just kept on staring at the bottom of his empty beer glass.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jungkook took no mercy on Namjoon as they walked down the street. After making sure you and Aera safely got an uber home, the little drunken monster unleashed.
“Hyung! You can’t let her do this!”
Namjoon gave a soft chuckle, though it didn’t reach his eyes. He was still processing everything himself; the weight of the conversation hanging heavily on him. Jungkook, who was practically bouncing on his feet with a mix of frustration and concern, shot him an incredulous look.
“You can’t just sit back and let her make such a huge decision by herself!” Jungkook insisted, his voice rising “She’s literally planning to have a baby alone, Hyung!”
“Kookie, she’s a full-grown woman.” Namjoon began slowly, rubbing a hand over his face “And she’s not doing this impulsively. She’s been thinking about it for months.” He paused, as if weighing his next words carefully “She’s not the kind of person to just… act on a whim. She has a plan. And I think, maybe, that’s what she needs right now.” He exhaled a deep breath, looking up at the street lights overhead, his mind running through the conversations he’d had with you.
Jungkook’s brows furrowed, a look of disbelief plastered on his face.
“And what about you?”
Namjoon stopped walking, his steps halting mid-stride as the question hit him like a stone wall. For a brief moment, there was nothing but the distant hum of a passing car and the quiet rustling of leaved in the evening air. He turned towards Jungkook; his eyes wide with uncertainty.
“What about me?” Namjoon asked, his voice low, the question more to himself that to Jungkook at first.
“Are we really doing this now?” Jungkook groaned “You love her. C’mon, catch up.”
Namjoon stood still, eyebrows meeting his hairline. He had always kept his feelings hidden, buried under layers of friendship and mutual understanding, the steady belief that he was just someone who needed to be there for you- no strings attached.
But now? Jungkook’s question churned him harder than he expected.
Namjoon blinked, unsure whether to laugh it off or tell him off.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Kookie.”
Jungkook didn’t let up. “Hyung, I’m serious. I see the way you look at her! The way you act around her! You’re not fooling anyone!”
“Yes, because she’s my friend!” Namjoon tried to protest, but Jungkook rolled his eyes.
“You don’t look at me like that!”
Namjoon’s chest tightened, his throat a little dry as he tried to force some clarity into his emotions.
“Kookie. You’re drunk, you need to sleep it off.”
Jungkook shook his head, as if he were trying to clear out the haze of alcohol clouding his mind. But the intensity of his words didn’t waver. “I’m not drunk enough to miss what’s right in front of me.” His voice softened a little “I’m just saying… maybe it’s time to stop pretending?”
“I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.” Namjoon repeated, but his voice wavered slightly, betraying him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sunday movie nights have been a staple in your relationship. Something you both held sacred since the beginning. Only under the most extreme circumstances had either of you ever canceled.
Lately, though, you seemed to call it off more often than not. Ever since you started your weekly appointments at the clinic, Namjoon noticed he was seeing less and less of you.
But tonight, you were adamant to keep the tradition alive. The opening credits of Deadpool 3 were already up on the screen, waiting for someone to press play, while Namjoon busied himself hauling all the blankets to the couch. A spread of your favorite snacks sat neatly on the coffee table. The only thing missing was... you.
In your bedroom, you sat at in the middle of your bed, the laptop balanced on your lap as you repeatedly refreshed your email inbox.
“You ready?” Namjoon called out from the living room.
“Yeah, just a sec!” You refresh again, your face lighting up when the awaited email appeared.
Namjoon watches your reaction and laughs, “Let me guess. It’s going to be more than a second now?”
“I just got the donor list. Want to help me choose?”
Namjoon’s laughter fades, replaced by a look of concern that make your heart race. He shifts from one foot to the other, trying to gauge your enthusiasm.
“Choose?” he repeats hesitantly, “Like, pick a donor?”
“Yeah,” you respond, excitement bubbling over as you quickly type away on the computer. “You’re my friend. I want your input. It feels right.”
He bites his lip, unsure of how to process this new layer to your already documented decision. “You really want me involved in this?”
“Of course! I trust you. Plus, it’s a big step. I could use a little support.” You give him a little sheepish smile, almost hiding your face behind the screen.
Namjoon nods slowly, the weight of your request settling in. “Okay… I’m here for you.” You beam up at him, quickly patting the space next to you “Just-how do we do this?” Namjoon settled down, his eyes quickly scanning the screen.
“There’s a list of profiles with backgrounds, interests and even photos. We can look through it together.” You pause, letting him read over the page.
“This guy seems interesting.” you say pointing to a profile that catches your eye “He’s into poetry, works as a dentist and seems really kind…” but your voice dies down “Ah, but his hair line is receding.”
Namjoon leans closer. “What about this smiley one?” he asks, highlighting a profile with a striking smile.
“Nah, he has a bit of an overbite.” You move the mouse away, “I want to minimize the chances of the kid needing braces.”
Namjoon chuckles, watching you scroll through the list “Oh look! A Redhead!”
“Can I be honest?” you glance up at him, smiling once you caught his gaze “I’m not really into gingers.” You whisper, earning yourself a lighthearted laugh from him. His dimples deepen, and his eyes nearly disappear with mirth.
“You’re such a stereotype.” He teases.
You finish scrolling through the profiles. Each one eliciting more critiques than compliments.
“Too many tattoos.”
“Too much facial hair.”
A crooked nose, a weird eye color, a weird mole. Too short; too tall. That one yodels for fun. You could go on~
After a few more profiles you reached the end. “Ugh, none of these guys are right. It’s like a never-ending list of disappointments.” You groan, closing the laptop and falling back on the mattress.
Namjoon sighs dramatically, taking the laptop from your grasp and setting it on the bedside table, leaning back on the bed. “Maybe you should add a ‘no weirdo’s filter’.”
“Seriously! What’s wrong with some of these guys?” you huff, crossing your arms over your chest.
This was already the third trial, and you still hadn’t chosen a single profile. Deep down, you knew the things you got so fixated on were merely superficial flaws, but they felt monumental when it came to deciding your future. Even with your careful planning, you couldn’t shake the feeling that you were running an undeniable risk.
That is not even considering the fact that the insemination might not even work in the first place. But that only added more chances and statistics to your plan, making your head spin. So, you consciously avoided that rabbit hole.
Namjoon chuckles softly, rolling on his side to face you. For a moment he said nothing, quietly studying your frustration.
“Listen,” he finally broke the silence, his eyes reflecting a gentle resignation “I know you don’t need it; but you have my full support. Whatever- or whoever- you pick.” His smile was so sincere that it made your heart skip over a beat, and in that moment, a new, bold idea took root in your mind.
You allowed yourself a moment to admire your friend- his perfectly symmetric face, kind eyes and adorable dimples. Your gaze drifted lower, taking in his chiseled jawline, elegant neck and the contours of his collarbones, all perfectly complementing his broad shoulders and newly toned muscles.
Suddenly, that unconventional idea that popped in your mind began to feel more enticing. After all, you knew him- the little quirks, the strengths, the pet peeves. You’d met his parents’ countless times. It could actually work out. And you were confident enough in your relationship to give it a shot.
You let out a soft sigh, your heart racing as you considered the next step in your journey. Turning to face him, you bit your lip as you hesitate before speaking.
“Namjoon… can I ask you something?”
“Of course.” He propped himself up on one elbow, concern flickering across his face.
You took a deep breath, gathering your ideas. “I’ve been thinking about this process, and-” You swallowed hard “It’s a big commitment. I want to make sure everything it perfect, you know?”
He is so understanding, watching you quietly and nodding along to your ramblings.
“So, I was wondering if you’d be willing to get tested.” You rushed the words out, your gaze darting to the ceiling, avoiding his eyes.
Namjoon’s brows furrowed in confusion “Get tested? Like... for what?”
You swallowed again, trying to keep your voice steady. “For compatibility. I’d like to know the donor’s genetics, and it would really help to have your input on it. It you’re comfortable, of course.”
A heavy silence filled the room. You could feel the tension in the air as Namjoon processed your request, your heart racing louder with each passing second of his contemplative silence.
“Wait.” He finally snapped, his voice low and measured “You want me to get tested as a potential donor?”
Your palms felt clammy as you looked back at him, offering him a shy nod “Yes?”
“That’s not what I meant-” He stopped his own idea in its tracks “Won’t it make things weird between us?”
“No! Just think about it! I know you; I know your family history. I like your face. And we don’t have to tell anyone. And you can choose how much you want to be involved in the baby’s life. Like I said, I want to be a single parent.”
Namjoon’s eyes widen as he listened to you ramble on and on about your idea. His brows furrowed deeper, knitting together as he tried to process your words. After a few long moments of constant talking, he held up a hand, stopping your frantic speech.
“Slow down,” he instructed, his voice low and measured, “Let me get this straight- you want me to consider being a sperm donor for your child?”
You nodded eagerly, stomach twisting with emotion and heart picking up in double time. “Yes! I know it’s a lot to ask, but I trust you. We’re best friends, and it would be nice to have a personal connection to the kid’s other parent.”
He turned away from you, deep in thought running a hand through his hair in agitation. “I-I don’t know.” His throat made a weird noise “This is a lot to process.”
Suddenly feeling uncertain, you bit your lip hard. “I know, I know. And it’s totally fine if you say no. We never have to speak of this again.” You shift slightly, feeling heat rise to your neck. “I just though since we’re so close…” You mumble, losing your idea for a moment, before quickly picking it up again "It's not like we'd be raising the kid together! Just, you know...biologically related. As friends."
Namjoon sighed heavily, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Look, I need some time to think about this, okay? It's not a decision I can make lightly."
"Of course," you replied quickly, not wanting to pressure him. "Take all the time you need. I'm sorry for springing this on you out of nowhere."
He offered a small, reassuring smile. “It’s all right. I’m just surprised. That’s all. I’ll let you know once I’ve had a chance to really consider it.’
You nodded, feeling a mix of hope and anxiety swirling in your gut. “Thank you, Joonie. Just for thinking about it.”
He reached out, giving your hand a comforting squeeze “I’ll always be here for you.”
You returned the gesture, heart full of affection for your best friend. “I know, thank you.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Joon 🎍: Just got the tests back. Damn. Don’t even know what half these things are. Busy-bee🐝: If you bring them over, I’ll translate. 😊 Joon 🎍: Yeah. Omw rn. Did you have dinner yet? Busy-bee🐝: Nooo, can we please have Bibimbap? Joon 🎍: Anything you want, love.
Namjoon arrived a short while later, carrying a takeout bag that wafted delicious aromas through the kitchen. He set it down on the table with familiarity, fetching plates and utensils as you carefully looked over the medical results.
“Bibimbap, just as you ordered.” He said, grinning. He looked at you, his expression shifting to one of concern as he noticed the serious look on your face “Is everything okay?”
You glanced up from the papers, forcing a smile “Just trying to wrap my head around all of this.”
He slid into the chair across from you, pulling the take-out container and placing it in front of you. “Take a break from the serious stuff for a moment. Food first. Medicine later.”
You chuckle softly and opened the container, the colorful array of veggies and rice making your stomach growl. “You’re right. Can’t think on an empty stomach.”
As you began to eat, Namjoon began to rifle through the papers. “So, what’s this one?” He picked up a paper, squinting at the dense text. “I swear, some of these graphs look like they belong in a science-fiction novel.”
You giggled, nodding along “I know, right? Let me see… This one is about genetic markers for health risks, and this one,” you pointed to the colorful one “It’s about traits related to personality and intelligence.”
Namjoon let out a long-intrigued sound, “What does it say about me?”
You chuckle, trying to suppress a smile “Well, it’s not like one of those personality tests you find in a girly magazine. But it says our baby might have higher chances of being a visual learner, with higher openness to experiences.” You take a big bite, quietly chewing over the fact that you just called it ‘our baby’ – as in, you and Namjoon. Mashed together.
“Openness to experience? That’s code for ‘adventurous’ right? I think I prefer the term ‘spontaneous’.” Namjoon feigned offence, looking over the papers as if trying to confirm your diagnosis.
“It’s another way to say you’ll jump at any wild idea.” You tease him, mouth half-full. “But it’s a good quality! You’re creative, fun and adaptable.”
He leaned in closer, curiosity piqued “And what about intelligence? Am I a genius?”
You flipped the paper around, scanning for the relevant section. “Looks like you score high on analytical thinking and problem-solving. So, I guess, in the right context, you could definitely call yourself a genius,”
“Can I add that to my cv?” he joked, before turning serious again “But does any of this affect your choice? Does it change anything for you?”
You took a moment, pondering his question as you quietly chewed your food. “I guess it just adds another layer to think about. I want the baby to have a good mix of traits, you know? If I choose a donor who has strengths like yours, it could make an indent in my favor.”
Namjoon’s expression softened, silently watching you scan the results, before a small smile tugged at his lips. “Whatever you decide, love.”
You smiled, feeling reassured as you grabbed the next paper “Thanks, love. Now, let’s see how your swimmers are doing!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There is a thin line between being a genius and an idiot. Namjoon liked using that line as a jumping rope. He had been called both names, sometimes within the same day. One minute he’d be diving deep into philosophical discussions, and the next he was deemed a mumbling fool simply because you fluttered your eyelashes at him.
He knows he is brilliant. His academic achievements and professional life were testament to that. A whole company depending on his decision. Yet here he was, getting grilled for the past hour by Seokjin and Taehyung for being the biggest dumbass that walked this dying earth.
“What do you mean you just agreed to be her sperm donor?” Seokjin blurted; his disbelief palpable as he leaned against Namjoon’s desk.
Namjoon just shrugged, trying to keep his cool. “It’s not as simple as that. We’ve talked about it, and I think it could work out.”
Taehyung leaned in; eyes wide with mock horror “You really jumped into this without thinking it through? Are you insane?”
“I thought about it plenty!” Namjoon retorted, frustration creeping in. “I trust her! We’re best friends. This isn’t some random decision.”
Seokjin raised an eyebrow, leaning back with a smirk “Best friend or not, you’ll be tied to her and that kid for life! You’d practically be family!”
"Guys, I get it," he said, trying to keep the edge out of his voice. "I've thought about this a lot, and I really believe this is the right thing to do."
Taehyung shook his head, a look of disbelief on his face. "You're not thinking straight, Namjoon. This is a huge decision, and you're not even considering the long-term implications."
"I am considering them!" Namjoon insisted. "I know that by agreeing to be her donor, I'm getting myself involved with her and the kid for life. But that's exactly what I want. I want to be there for them and support them in any way I can."
Seokjin sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Namjoon, you're a brilliant guy. You've always been one of the smartest people I know. But sometimes, I worry that you're so focused on doing the right thing that you don't stop to consider whether it's the smart thing."
Namjoon opened his mouth to protest, but Taehyung cut him off. "He's right, Namjoon! This isn't just a textbook case. This is real life, and there are real emotions involved. You can't just apply your weird logic to everything and expect it to work out."
Namjoon sighed, feeling a pang of frustration. He knew his friends were just trying to protect him, but he couldn’t help but feel like they were overcomplicating things.
"Maybe you're right," he said after a moment. "Maybe I am an idiot for doing this. But it's a risk I'm willing to take. I trust her, and I want to be there for her. That's all that matters to me."
Seokjin and Taehyung exchanged a look, but eventually, they both nodded.
"Alright," Seokjin said. "We'll support you, no matter what. But you’re still an idiot.”
Namjoon sighed; resignation evident on his features at he turned his attention back to his computer.
“You could’ve asked her on a date and get to the baby making naturally.” Seokjin added.
“She doesn’t want a relationship.”
“Well, you can skip straight to the baby making!” Taehyung exclaimed, but Namjoon just rolled his eyes.
“It’s not that simple, Tae...”
Unbeknownst to Namjoon, on the other side of town, you and Sumi, your good friend and co-worker, were engaged in a strikingly similar conversation.
“So, I asked him to donate a sample.” You fidgeted with your fingers under the table, unable to meet her eyes, cheeks burning with embarrassment as you voiced your actions. “Any thoughts?”
Sumi studies you for a long moment, her expression inscrutable. You felt the intensity of her gaze as she tries to gauge your sincerity. Finally, she broke the silence.
“Yes, and prayers,” she said softly “You need them.” She gives you that incredulous look that only the head nurses seem to master.
You blink, stunned by her response. You expected something different, something along the lines of excitement or curiosity, instead, her reaction was surprisingly tame.
“Why didn’t you just bang him?” She asks, her tone casual, no hint of professionalism in her demeanor.
Your eyes widen in shock “Ayy! Don’t say that!”
“I mean, you can cut out the clinical middle man this way,” she continued “And god knows you need to get laid.”
Your face grew hot. “That’s not the point...” you mumble.
Sumi raised an eyebrow. “Then what is the point, exactly?” She leaned back in her chair, bubble tea clasped in her hands and a smirk playing on her lips. “The baby gets made either way. This is just more fun.” She giggled “You know, Jimin told me that Namjoon used to have quite a reputation with women back in his day.”
You shift in your seat, avoiding Sumi’s probing gaze as you gathered your thoughts. The conversation has taken a turn you hadn’t anticipated, and you were struggling to find the right words.
“The point is, I want to do this the right way.” you say, aimlessly spinning the straw in your drink. “I want to give this child the best possible start in life, and that means doing things properly.”
Sumi considers your words for a moment, before nodding in understanding “I get that,” she says. “But you don’t have to be so serious all the time. You can still have fun and enjoy the process.”
You can’t help but snicker as she emphasizes the words “You sound just like Jimin,” you say, referencing her boyfriend. “He’s always telling me to lighten up and enjoy myself.”
“Well, he’s not wrong.” Sumi says with a grin. “And just so we’re clear, sex is the ‘proper way’ that normal humans use to make babies.”
You roll your eyes, “I know that.”
“Good. At least I don’t need to explain how that works.” She smirks “And I’m sure Namjoon would be more than happy to oblige.”
Suddenly, a very vivid image appears in your mind. Namjoon, hovering over you, his breath washing over your face as your hips collide together. You feel a shiver run down your spine, butterflies emerging in your stomach and quickly push the thought away.
“Make the poor guy feel more involved in the process. You’re treating him like milking cow right now.”
“God, don’t say that!” You cry out, shaking your head to clear the image from your mind. Namjoon was a gentleman, and you were grateful for his help. But the thought of asking him to sleep with you too made you uncomfortable. How would that conversation go?
Hey Joonie, since you’re already getting me pregnant, why not just fuck me?
Sumi laughed, "Well, it's an option. And sometimes, the most unconventional methods can lead to the most beautiful outcomes."
You couldn't argue with that. After all, you were about to become a single mother, and that was certainly not the conventional route.
You take a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart as you look across the table at her. She was watching you with a knowing smile, one that suggested she could see right through your nervous façade.
“And just think of it this way, all that money you save from all the clinic appointments can go towards buying cute baby clothes.”
That was the weakest argument yet, but still, you found yourself actually entertaining that idea.
“Do you really think he’ll agree?” as the words leave your mouth a pang of guilt strikes you. Namjoon has been nothing but kind and generous so far, and here you were, letting your horny thoughts take over. You respect and value your friendship more than the need to ‘make things fun’. You can’t do anything to jeopardize that.
“Trust me babe,” Sumi sounds so casual in her conviction. She’s right thought- sometimes, the unconventional ways do lead to the most favorable outcomes. And you can’t deny the spark that ignites in your chest whenever you think about Namjoon.
And this way, you can have more control over the situation. The amount, the frequency. The position….
After all, all the pregnancy and fertility books you’d read recommended that a deep connection is important when it comes to getting pregnant.
“I don’t know,” you mumble, fidgeting with your fingers again. “I mean, it’s not like I can just ask him to sleep with me.”
Sumi chuckles and takes a sip of her bubble tea. "Why not? You're two consenting adults, and you both want the same thing. It's not like you're asking him to marry you or anything."
You can't help but roll your eyes at her flippant attitude. "Yeah, I know, but it's not that simple. Namjoon is a good friend, and I don't want to ruin that. Plus, I don't know if I'm ready for something so...intimate with him."
Sumi raises an eyebrow. "Intimate? Girl, you're already asking him to donate his sperm. How much more intimate can you get?"
You take a deep shaky breath, trying to lower your blood pressure as you absorbed her words. She has a point- you hate it, but she has a point.
“Okay, I’ll think about it.” you finally say, meeting her gaze. Sumi just smirks at you, clearly pleased with that response.
“That’s all I can ask for.” She says, taking another sip from her bubble tea. “And remember, there’s no rush. Take your time and do whatever feels right.”
You nodded, feeling the heaviness in your chest swirl. You knew this was a big decision, and you don’t want to take any part of it lightly. But you also can’t ignore the possibilities that lay ahead.
As the conversation turns to other topics, your thoughts wandered back to Namjoon. You imagined his kind smile, his gentle nature, and his unwavering support. And you can help but let your mind fantasize.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Busy-bee🐝: Need to ask you smth. Joon 🎍: If it’s about the sample, I’m omw to drop it off at the clinic now. Busy-bee🐝: NoooOooOoo Busy-bee🐝: Stop! Busy-bee🐝: Pls don’t. Joon 🎍: Did you change your mind? Busy-bee🐝: No. Not quite. Joon 🎍: Quite? What happened? What do I do now? Busy-bee🐝: Can you just come over? Joon 🎍: Sure? But just so you know. I have a jar of sperm with me. Busy-bee🐝: Yyuckkk Joon 🎍: Don’t worry. It’s sealed. Busy-bee🐝: Still gross, lol. Just hurry. Need to talk.
While you waited for him to arrive, your heart pounded in your chest. You paced around your apartment in your pajamas, desperately searching for something- anything to clean or organize. The conversation with Sumi replayed in your mind, her words echoing as you contemplated your options thoroughly.
You couldn’t possibly complicate things with Namjoon, could you?
A soft knock on the door breaks you out of your reverie. And with a deep breath, you open it to find Namjoon standing there, casual and charming, in a green hoodie and ripped jeans, the familiar warm smile lighting up his face.
“Hey,” he says, stepping inside “What’s up? You sounded urgent.”
“Um, yeah…” you close the door behind him and gestured for him to sit on the couch. “I wanted to talk about the… um, sample?”
He raises an eyebrow “Didn’t you just say not to take it to the clinic?”
You wince sightly, still grappling with how to express what you really wanted to say. “Well, I was thinking…maybe we can talk about the process?”
Namjoon settles down, giving you his full attention, confusion clearly evident on his face “What’s on your mind?”
“Sumi mentioned that-” You stop, allowing yourself a second to gather your fraying thoughts, “Well, since we’re both consenting adults…I thought it would be more medically apt to try this with a more ‘hand-on’ approach.”
He nodded, listening closely as he rubbed his chin. A cliché lightbulb suddenly going off in his mind and Namjoon’s eyes widened as he took you in.
“Are you suggesting you what I think you’re suggesting? Because if you’re not my mind went to a very inappropriate place.” He asks, his tone light but serious.
You stammer, nodding slowly as heat flooded your face and neck. “I mean, it’s just an idea. We’re both single…” you trail off, staring at a painting on the wall, “I know it’s unconventional, but I just want to make sure everything’s… right.”
He leans back, quietly considering your words, “It’s definitely a bigger step. Are you sure you’re comfortable with that?”
As he leaned back on the couch, he spread his legs wider, getting comfortable and invertedly drawing your attention to his well-toned thighs, making your mouth go dry.
“Honestly,” you force yourself to look him in the eye. “I don’t know. But I like the idea of us being more connected during the- that. It feels… outlined better?” you sighed exasperated with your own brain for not cooperating. “But I don’t want it to ruin our friendship. You mean a lot more to me.”
“You mean a lot to me too, and don’t worry,” he says, “I promise the friendship will remain intact.” He paused for a moment, “And I also agreed once, so yeah, I’m here for you whatever you decide.”
A quiet moment passes as you let his words sink in. His expression was earnest, and the sincerity in his voice offered a reassuring warmth. It was comforting to know that, no matter what weird direction you decide to go in, Namjoon would still treat you like a priority. You let out a long breath you didn’t realize you were holding.
“Really? You’d be okay with that?”
“Of course,” Namjoon replied, “If your plan needs me here five times a week, then I’ll be here.”
A deep red blush creeps up your neck to settle on your cheeks, as your mind quietly conjures up the scenario where five nights in a row, Namjoon comes over and bends you over every surface in your apartment.
You smiled, a wave of excitement washing over you, but beneath that smile, your mind raced and your heart fluttered. This was a significant decision, and you needed to approach it strategically!
“The plan requires we lay down some ground rules first,” you say, shifting your tone to a more analytical one, “We need to define what this would look like for both of us. Like boundaries, approach and what we’re comfortable with.”
As you sit down next to him, your heart still pounds in your chest. “Okay, so, here’s what I was thinking,” you begin after a drawn-out breath, “We should approach this like a partnership, with communication and mutual respect. We’ll need to set some rules and make sure we’re both comfortable.”
“That makes sense. I want you to feel safe throughout this process. What kind of boundaries did you have in mind?”
“Well, for starters, we should only do this when we’re sober and well-rested. And we should check in with each other beforehand to make sure we’re on the same page.” You scratch at the back of your neck, looking away for a second.
“That’s a good start.”
“And it’s about the baby making.” You add.
“We already established that.” Namjoon nods, a serious look on his face.
“Are you comfortable with a more casual approach or do you think we should be more clinical about it?”
“Casual. Definitely.” Namjoon shakes his head at the idea of doing it in a sterile white room, a shiver running down his spine. But he quickly composes himself and in turn asks you, “What about after? Do we tell people about this, or keep it to ourselves?”
You took a moment to chew on your bottom lip, considering the implications, even though you’ve thought about this before.
“We should keep it to ourselves for the moment being. Even if almost everyone knows you donated, they don’t need to know…” you trail off again, the blush deepening “How.”
Namjoon nods in understanding, “I can respect that. I don’t want any unnecessary drama.” He gave you a reassuring smile.
You take another deep breath, and allow the sense of relief that comes with his smile wash away any lingering discomfort.
“Thank you. I really appreciate everything you’re doing.
Namjoon reaches out and takes your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "I'm here for you, no matter what. And I want you to know that I'm not doing this out of a sense of obligation. I genuinely care about you and want to help you achieve your dream of becoming a mother."
Your heart swells with emotion at his words. "Thank you," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. "That means more to me than you could ever know."
You sit there for a moment, hands intertwined in silence. The weight of your decision quietly sinking in around you.
“I think the next thing we need to set is a schedule,” you say, ruining the moment. “It’s important we’re consistent about this, for the best possible outcome.”
“How often do you think we should try?”
“The research suggests that every other day is a good-enough frequency. But we can see how it works out and adjust afterwards.”
“Every other day. Got it.” He confirms, then asks the only important question of the night:
“When do we start?”
Your heart stops right in its tracks, even as you distract yourself by suddenly reaching to grab your phone, “Let me look at my cycle.” You mumble, opening the fertility tracking app you’d been using.
As you scroll through the app, you felt Namjoon’s presence loom closer, curiosity evident of his face. “How does that work exactly?”
“Do you need me to explain a period to you?” You tease, small smile breaking you from your serious poise.
“No. I just-” Namjoon took a deep breath, nervousness lingering on the edge of his voice as he ran a hand through his hair, “I’m just thinking out loud here, but why wait?”
An audible gasp leaves you lips when you look up at him.
The air between you crackles with electricity, and you suddenly realize just how close you were. In that moment you could almost feel the weight of your actions begin to unravel.
You lock eyes, the tension thickening as you ponder his suggestion. Taking a shaky breath, your heart thunders, and you struggle to process the whirlwind of emotions swirling within you.
"Are you sure?" you ask, your voice barely above a whisper. "I mean-"
Namjoon nods, leaning closer to you, his voice steady "I'm sure."
You bite your bottom lip, your mind racing as you try to decide whether or not to take the leap. You've always been a planner, someone who likes to have everything mapped out in advance, but for once in your life, you find yourself wanting to throw caution out the window.
It couldn’t possibly hurt; in fact, it might prove to be beneficial. You’d get the awkward stage over with quickly, instead of letting it simmer while waiting for your fertile window.
Why let nervousness and anticipation settle in when he’s right here, sitting on your couch looking absolutely delectable?
You quickly go over your mental check-list, feeling grateful that you showered and shaved just before he arrived. Your Pj’s are cute, and while your underwear isn’t the sexiest, it’s decent- either way, this isn’t about passion; it’s practical.
You were almost done chewing your lip off when you feel his thumb gently touch your chin, stopping you.
“Only if you want.”
“I can’t remember if I made my bed this morning.” You whisper sheepishly, pulling him out of his serious demeanor. His heartfelt laughter weaving through the tension that hung between you.
“That’s what you’re thinking about?”
“You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m here,” You giggle, shaking your head and throwing your phone somewhere on the couch. “Let’s do this.”
Namjoon’s smile broadens as he stands up, extending his hand to you. You almost hesitate for just a moment before placing your hand in his, letting him pull you up from the couch and in his arms. Heat radiates off his body as he leans in, his hand gently brushing your hair away from your face.
“Can I kiss you?”
“Yes,” you whisper, closing your eyes as his breath lingers just above your lips.
Then, he kisses you.
At first, it’s gentle, his lips barely brushing over yours, a subtle invitation for you to take the lead. His lips taste faintly like mint from Chapstick, soft and warm, and soon the kiss deepens with a surge of passion. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you pull him closer, feeling the heat between you build. Namjoon’s hands glide to your back, exploring you with a leisurely touch that sends waves of excitement through you.
He breaks the kiss, his lips trailing down to your neck, and you tilt your head back, moaning softly when he gently nibbles on your ear.
“You’re adorable.” He whispers, his hands moving to the front of your shirt to cup your breasts. You gasp as he teases your nipples through your shirt, and with a flicker of courage, your hands slip under his hoodie, feeling the hard lines of his abs under your fingertips.
Namjoon smirks at you as you tug his hoodie upward, but he helps you pull it off, revealing his bare chest and you run your fingers over his toned muscles, feeling his heartbeat beneath your touch.
“Joonie, you’re so jacked.” You say with an airy laugh, feeling a surge of confidence pulse through you. “God, I need you.” Taking his hands in yours, you guide him towards the bedroom, your heart pounding in your chest.
Walking ahead, you can feel a wave of self-consciousness wash over you, even as you remind yourself that this is just Namjoon—the man who always chooses his words carefully and who’s always there for you. But any hesitation melts away when you reach the bedroom. You push the door open, and with renewed vigor, you quickly shed your shirt and bra, moving on to your pants.
Namjoon’s eyes widen at the sight of you standing there in just your underwear. Though he fights to remain respectful, the hunger in his gaze is unmistakable when you bend down to throw your clothes in the corner of the room.
When you face him again, his lips capture yours, silencing whatever you were about to say. His tongue delves into your mouth, teasing and exploring, and you respond eagerly, his touch sending a thrill of excitement through you.
“You’re so pretty, baby.” He murmurs, his mouth leaving a trail of fire down your neck and shoulders. You arch into his touch, your eagerness growing with every lingering touch.
When his mouth finally finds your breasts, he captures one in his mouth and starts teasing it with the lightest graze of his teeth. A sharp gasp escapes you, a rush of pleasure shooting straight to your core.
Your hands fumble with the button of his jeans, desperate to feel him against you. But struggling to push his jeans down, Namjoon steps back just enough to help you, letting you slide them off with ease.
Taking a moment, you stop to gawk at his arousal straining against his boxers. Damn, you had a feeling he was equipped. He just carried that air about him. But nothing could have prepared you for how massive he actually was. The sight of him, hard and ready for you, sends a new wave of heat through your body, and you find yourself biting your lip in eager anticipation.
You can’t help but stare, taking in his impressive size. He truly is a giant, with broad shoulders, a muscular chest, and an impressive cock. You can’t wait to feel him against you, inside of you, filling you up all the way.
But Namjoon has other ideas. He kneels in front of you, his hands moving to your ass, giving it a firm squeeze before pulling you closer. He plants a series of soft kisses along your stomach and thighs, each one sending waves of electricity coursing through you.
“Can I take these off?” he asks against your thigh, playfully snapping the elastic of your panties. And unable to speak, you nod.
With a quick tug, Namjoon hooks his fingers around the elastic and pulls, leaving you completely bare before him. You gasp as the cold air brushes against your skin, but he doesn’t seem to notice. Instead, he looks up at you, his gaze intense and full of determination.
You take a moment to savor the image before you: Namjoon kneeling, his eyes dark with desire, radiating an intensity that makes it seem like he could devour you whole. You tangle your fingers in his hair, pulling him closer, and without hesitation, he places one of your legs over his shoulder, kissing your inner thigh while his fingers move to your folds. A jolt of pleasure shoots down your spine as he finds your clit, rubbing tight, deliberate circles against it.
“So wet.” He breaths against you, sending shivers through your body. He glances up at you one last time, seeking your permission with his gaze.
“Namjoon, wait,” you say, gently pushing him away. “This isn’t how we make a baby.”
God, the hold he had over you was intoxicating, making it nearly impossible to refocus and regain your composure.
He chuckles, the hunger in his eyes still smoldering. “No, but this is going to make you feel really, really good.” He replied, his voice a low rumble, hands still holding you steady by the hips.
“I know. But this isn’t about feeling good.” You insist, your hand dropping from his hair and your leg from his shoulder.
Namjoon almost looks disappointed as you step away from him, but then he nods, understanding the importance of your goal.
“Right, I got carried away.”
“Here, just sit on the bed,” you instruct, offering a hand to help him up. Namjoon obeys, perching himself on the edge of the bed, his gaze locked onto you, tracking your every step as you approach.
Removing his boxers, you’re awestruck once again by the sight of his pretty cock—big, veiny and heavy with a flushed pink tip, leaking precum. Namjoon reclines slightly, his hands resting behind his head, watching you straddle him. You spit into your hand, wrapping it around his hardness to pump him a few times before positioning him at your entrance, slowly sinking down on him.
You both let out a sigh of pleasure as he fills you completely. A soft whimper escapes you as you bottom out, and you bury your face in his shoulder as his hands move to your hips, his thumbs tracing gentle circles in a soothing rhythm.
“Are you okay?” he whispers in your hair.
“Yeah, give me a second,” you reply, taking a deep breath as you adjust to the stretch, his warmth filling you completely. After a moment, you straighten up, meeting his eyes with a soft smile. “It’s been a while.”
Namjoon nods, his gaze soft as he steadies you, guiding you into a rhythm. Rising and sinking back down, you gasp at the sensation of being this stuffed, bracing your hands on his chest for balance as you start to rock your hips, grinding against him.
At first, you move slowly, savoring the feeling, but soon your pace quickens, spurred by the intensity building in your lower stomach.
“That’s it, sweetheart.” Namjoon encourages, squeezing your hips to help you maintain your rhythm. Your quiet moans blending beautifully with the sound of skin meeting skin, filling the room with your shared pleasure.
Before long, your thighs start to burn, but the growing tension inside you keeps you bouncing on his cock. You were almost there; Namjoon could sense it too in the way your walls flutter around him. One of his hands slips between your bodies, fingers deftly finding your clit and stroking it with perfect precision.
And once he feels you getting too tired to continue, Namjoon takes over, trusting up into you with powerful, steady strokes that meet your faltering movements. The intensity of his pace, mixed with his fingers that never slowed, push you right over the edge, sending you spiraling into bliss.
You cry out as waves of pleasure ripple through you, your orgasm shaking you to your core. Namjoon groans, feeling you clench around him as your body crashes against his chest. His hands grip your ass tightly, and his thrusts grow erratic as he chases his own release, his breathing ragged and soft whimpers escaping his lips. Each sound spurs another clench from you, drawing him even closer to the edge.
“Come on, baby,” you whisper in his ear, fingers gently massaging his scalp as you let him use your spent body however he pleases. “Just let go.”
With a loud, drawn-out moan, Namjoon buries himself deep inside you, and you feel his hot, sticky cum filling you completely. A cry escaped you, muffled against his shoulder as you sink your teeth into his soft skin, overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment.
Your body slowly relaxes, breaths still coming out in quick, shallow gasps.
Namjoon looks over at you, a satisfied smile softening his expression, and a deep, unexpected sense of connection settles over you, an intimacy unlike anything you’ve felt before. Leaning in, you kiss him slowly, silently thanking him for the experience
As you pull away, you roll to lie beside to him, your legs still intertwined. Staring up at the ceiling, a warm contentment fills you, grounding you in the quiet rhythm of his steady breathing.
“Thank you,”
“Anything for you, love.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
6:30 AM- Your alarm rings.
You bolt upright, momentarily forgetting you were meant to wake up, letting out a little groan as you flop back onto the pillow.
“Why do you wake up so fucking early?”
The voice behind you startles you, and you remember with a rush that Namjoon ended up spending the night. His deep, early morning voice sends a flutter of butterflies through your stomach, memories of last night’s activities rushing back to you.
“Usually I do my yoga,” you mumble back, “and after that I shower and get ready for work.” You yawn, stretching all your limbs, before settling right back in his arms, snuggling closer.
“Why?”
“Because we can’t all afford to sleep till noon.” You tease.
Namjoon chuckles softly, wrapping his arms tighter around you. “Fair point. But I could get used to sleeping in with you.”
You smile, your heart picking up at the thought. “Maybe I’ll let you join my morning routine someday.” You stay nestled in his arms for a few more moments, enjoying the comfort of his warmth. But soon, the call of nature interrupts your peaceful morning.
With a reluctant sigh, you wiggle out of his embrace. “I’ll be right back.” You say, glancing over your shoulder at him.
Namjoon nods, sleepy smile on his face as he watches your naked body, before he snaps himself out of it.
“Are you going to take a pregnancy test?”
You chuckle as you swing your legs off the bed and pad softly towards the bathroom. “It’s too early. That would be a waste of a test.”
The cold floor contrasts with the warmth you just left behind, and as you close the door, you can’t help but grin, thinking about how nice it is to have him there with you.
You quickly go about your business, splashing some water on your face to wake yourself up. After a moment you finish up and head back to the bedroom. Namjoon is still lounging against the pillows, his eyes slightly glazed but filled with warmth.
“Back already?” he asks, sleepy smile spreading across his face.
“Yeah,” you walk over to your closet, rifling through your clothes as you decide what to wear. The soft morning light filtering through the windows, casing a warm glow over the room. Once you’re all done you walk over to him, leaning down to plant a sweet kiss on his cheek.
“I’m heading out. I’ll leave the spare key in the kitchen for you.” You say, feeling a mix of excitement and reluctance to leave.
He smiles, his dimples showing up on his cheeks, “Thanks, I’ll take good care of it…”
You laugh lightly, leaning in again, this time kissing him.
“God, if anything, I hope out baby gets your dimples.” You confess, your heart swelling at the thought.
His expression softens, a hint of surprise lighting up his eyes. “That would be adorable.” He says, a smile spreading across his face, and this time he leans in to kiss you. So soft and sweet, almost convincing you to join him back in bed. You need to place a hand on his chest to pull away, a deep red blush spreading across your face.
“I’ll text you later.”
“It’s a plan.” He smiles, watching you walk away, taking the warmth in the room with you. When the bedroom clicks shut, he finally feels like he can breathe again.
He was a walking disaster. Books will be written about his sheer foolishness, how he willingly tosses aside logic and reason in your presence.
Yet, deep down, he recognized that beneath his eager exterior lay a selfish yearning- a desire for you, wholly and completely, all to himself.
But for as long as you would have him, even like this, with weirdly restricted intimacy, he would give you everything you ask for.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Over the following months, you two manage to establish a working system. The spare key was Namjoon’s now, and he had a dedicated drawer in your closet for his things.
His toothbrush quietly chilling next to yours in the master bathroom.
Along the way, you uncovered a surprising list of things you never imagined you’d learn about your best friend;
Like the fact that he is a talker, loving the way you’d clench around him when he spills pure filth in your ear. He talks you through your climaxes, encouraging you to lose yourself, and cheering you on as if you were competing in a marathon each time.
He also had a habit of giving you all kinds of pet-names, sweet endearments that easily fell from his lips. “Sweetheart”, “Baby”, “Honey”, “Lovely”. However, your favorite was probably the time he accidentally called you a ‘busy bee’ in the middle of one of his ecstatic hazes. The unexpected nickname bringing a smile to your face, even as you surrendered to the waves of pleasure he unleashed within you.
He also had a thing for hickeys. Your breasts now fully decorated with blooming red love-marks, after you scolded him for leaving one right under your collar bone for the whole world to see.
For two weeks, you only wore turtlenecks because of him.
But what stood out the most was his seemingly endless stamina. If it wasn’t for your insistence to take it easy, he would very willingly fuck you until the early morning light.
Much like he was doing right now…
But it was Saturday. You decide you could afford to sleep in.
You could feel him right in your stomach, a ring of cum forming at the base of his cock as he kept on pounding into your abused pussy.
One of your legs over his shoulder, and the other one around his hip, pulling him closer as he kept on trusting into you. You tried your best to move with him, meeting his rapid movements, but you got lost in the pleasure when his finger flicked your clit. You almost scream reaching your climax for the nth time, your body shaking with the force of the release. Namjoon didn’t slow down though, instead picking up the pace as he chased his own orgasm.
“That’s a good fucking girl,” he growled “Not gonna stop til’ I fill you up with my cum. That’s what you want, right angel? Want to be stuffed full? Have it dripping out of you when I’m done?” he rendered you a completely useless, weakly moaning back at his filth.
“God, if you’re not pregnant after this.” He groans in your neck, making you shiver again.
The moon was high in the sky, casting a warm glow over the room. Engulfing him completely in a silvery haze, and you couldn’t help but admire the beautiful man on top on you. His closed eyes, a bead of sweat trickling down his forehead, his lips parted in pure ecstasy. You almost couldn’t believe this was your best friend, the person who knew you better than anyone else in the world.
Namjoon reaches his own climax, and you clenched around him, milking every last drop eagerly.
He collapses on top of you, your bodies slick with sweat, yet you just lay there, wrapped in his arms as the night quietly carried on.
This was the new normal, and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
After a little while, Namjoon pulls out, quickly grabbing a napkin from the nightstand to wipe away any excess cum before it stains your sheets. You winced at the touch, feeling sore in the best of ways.
“I’m sorry baby. I went a little hard.” He says after discarding the napkin, pulling you closer to him.
You lay there, spent and satisfied in his arms, a little chuckle escaping you at the absurdity of ‘little’ being the past four hours. “Rough day at work?” you ask, looking up, your fingers gently pushing the hair away from his forehead.
“You have no idea,” he huffs, glancing away “With the business trip coming up I can’t seem to catch a break.”
“You’re leaving on a trip?” you stand up straight, looking down at him, trying to keep the disappointment from your voice.
“Yeah baby, I told you I’m leaving on the 5th.” He replies, his voice twinged with exhaustion.
“That is this month?” You fumble out of the bed to grab your calendar from the desk, turning all the lights on and flipping through it.
Has it been two months already? How come you’re not pregnant already?
You quietly look over the pages, calculating exactly what day you should be getting your period on. And your heart raced when you realized;
Last week. This might be it. You might be pregnant already.
“Oh my god, Namjoon!” you giggle like a little girl, jumping and spinning around the room. “This might be it! I’m one week late!”
Namjoon’s eyes widened in surprise, and he grabs your arm, pulling you back on the bed. The calendar flying away somewhere as he places his hand on your still-flat belly.
“Really?”
You nodded, a big smile completely taking over your face
“Yeah really.” You giggle “I mean, can’t know for sure, but I’m one week late.” You insist, almost kicking your legs with excitement.
No way you were going back to sleep after this. Instead, you jump back up, running around the room like a little tornado, gabbing your clothes and rushing to the bathroom to shower.
You needed to schedule a doctor’s appointment, go buy the last of the supplies, pick a color for the nursery and look up all the forms needed for maternity leave.
Namjoon sat in the silence of your bedroom, listening to the water from the shower run as you chaotically prepare and plan your future. The thought leaves him feeling a little empty, knowing he is not a part of that plan.
He wanted to invite you to join him for the business trip in Singapore, the plane tickets bookmarked and ready to be purchased. Even if he’d be busy working, the thought of having you nearby calmed his nerves about the whole ordeal. But now he hesitated, unsure if it was a good idea. With everything getting more complicated- especially the possible pregnancy- his feelings were tangled between simply wanting to support you and grappling with the deeper emotions he couldn’t ignore.
“Do you think you can handle building a crib?” you ask when you return form the bathroom.
But only silence greeted you, with no sign of Namjoon left behind.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Life had this way about it. One moment you’re riding high, and the next one you’re struggling to comprehend the fragility of human nature.
It shouldn’t come as a surprise, yet it still stings when your plan doesn’t perfectly match reality.
You plan a future with a man, only to be confronted with the painful truth that you’ve been the second woman all along. Shaking you to your core and ruining any future relationships for you along the way.
You take the leap, decide to get pregnant, and for a moment, it feels like everything is finally falling into place. But then that red dark spot appears, shattering all your dreams and hard work.
You didn’t need the pregnancy test anymore- not when your period arrives unexpectedly at the hospital office. Yet, you still find yourself staring at the little stick resting on your desk while Sumi draws a blood sample.
“Are you going to be okay?” She asks, pressing a sterile swab to your arm before continuing. Her voice is gentle, but you can only hear the concern beneath it. You nod, though uncertainty lingers in your mind, and the weight of your reality feels heavier than ever.
You spend the rest of the day meticulously reviewing the hospital’s schedules, throwing yourself in the comforting security that the numbers and graphs provide. You check supplies, organize the timetables, and ensure that no section of the hospital is backed up. Each task grounds you, allowing you to focus on something tangible amid the chaos swirling in your mind.
At around noon you get the message from the testing facility. Deep down, you already knew the blood work would come back negative, just like the test stick, but it still shattered the last glimmer of hope you had left.
You read the message again, trying to process the words, but they blur together as a wave of disappointment washed over you. The sterile walls of the hospital suddenly feel suffocating, and the rhythm of the bustling environment seems to fade into the background.
You take a deep breath, fighting back tears. Great. Now you were hormonal too.
You force yourself to push through the day, focusing on tasks, but the ache in your chest still lingers.
Joon 🎍: Are we still on for tonight? Baby-momma 🐝: Nah. Got my period. Joon 🎍: Shit. Are you okay? Baby-momma 🐝: Shit pretty much sums it up. Baby-momma 🐝: But I’ll be fine. Joon 🎍: Well, it’s Sunday. We could just watch a movie…. Haven’t done that in a while. Joon 🎍: I’ll even pick up your favorite greasy foods if you agree.
You smile at your phone, feeling the warmth spread through you despite the heaviness of the day. The idea of sharing a cozy movie night with him feels like a welcomed escape. You type back quickly, your heart lifting just a bit.
Baby-momma 🐝: That sounds nice. I could use a distraction✨ Joon 🎍: Great. I’ll be over after work.
When the working day is finally over, you make your way home, quickly going through the motions. You shower, tidy up a bit, and set up the living room for the movie night, arranging blankets and laying out an array of snacks across the coffee table.
Namjoon said he’s be there by 7, but as the clock ticks closer to 9, you find yourself bored out of your mind. You glance at your phone for any updates, but there’s nothing. You try to distract yourself with a show, but your mind keeps wandering to what could delay him.
Just as you consider sending a text, you hear the key turning in the lock. The door swings open, and Namjoon steps inside, a smile breaking across his face.
“I’m sorry I’m late. Got caught up in a meeting.” He says, holding the bag of junk food.
You feel a rush of relief as he walks in the familiar warmth of his presence instantly lifting your spirits. “You made it just in time.” You say, gesturing to the setup.
He chuckles, placing the bag on the coffee table. “I got you one of those abominable triple chocolate cakes you like.” He settles in besides you, unpacking the bag and you can’t help but smile up at him.
“God, I love you.” You grin digging in, completely unaware to what effect your words have on him. He pauses for a moment, a hint of surprise flickering across his face, before returning your smile with a warmth that sends your heart racing.
As you both dig into the food, Namjoon seems a bit more pensive than usual, his smile lingering as he watches you blissfully enjoy the cake. You almost moan out loud after the first bite, your face surprisingly similar to the one you have when you reach your climax.
After a moment he clears his throat, looking away as a deep shade of red takes over his ears.
“Hey, I was thinking,” he begins, glancing at you with a hint of hesitation. “You know that I have that business trip coming up.”
“Yeah,” you’re barely paying him any attention.
“I’d really love for you to join me.”
Your head snaps up, surprise lighting up your features. “Wait, really? You want me to come?”
He meets your gaze, his expression earnest. “Yeah, I think it would be great. I’ll be busy with meetings, but we can explore together in the evenings. It’ll be fun.”
You can’t help but smile, feeling a rush of excitement. “If I can get off work, sure. Just tell me when to book my tickets.”
Namjoon’s face lights up with relief and happiness. “Yeah, I’ll send you the details as soon as I can.”
You giggle, already daydreaming about the adventure ahead.
“Next week, no?”
“Yeah.” he replies, taking a big mouthful of his burger. You grin, excited at the thought that by that time you would also be done with your period.
“Ah! There’s a medical conference happening around that time too. It would be so cool if they aligned,” you say your excitement bubbling over.
Namjoon nods, his eyes lighting up. “That would be perfect! You could network while I’m in meetings.”
“Exactly! I’ll look into it!” you say, feeling the anticipation grow. The idea of a trip filled with both work and exploration feels like just the right remedy for your disappointment, reigniting a spark of hope.
The duality of man.
#namjoon x reader#namjoon smut#namjoon x you#namjoon imagine#namjoon scenarios#kim namjoon#bts x reader#bts smut#bts x y/n#bts x fem!reader#bts x you#perfect plan
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Hii! I've been scrolling through all your works and I just want to say I am ✨obsessed✨ so I saw a post where you were asking for fluff or angst request and I really really REALLY wanna see what Viktor and jayce would do if they're jealous or being protective! Like they saw reader at one of the parties and was being incredibly hit on. Would also be nice if it would be like pre-relationship! Like they're gonna confess or something, I don't really know this is my first time asking for request acckkk
(I really really want it to be jayvik x reader too pls 🙏🙏)
GREEN EYED - JAYVIK X READER



synopsis: everyone knows the three of you are together. It’s no secret either. So imagine their surprise when the three of you go to a council party and a few guests flirt with you. They're not very happy about that…
warnings: unwanted flirting, Jayce and Viktor saving you, pre-established relationship, Viktor hits/trips people with his cane, Jayce is a bodyguard, fluff, suggestiveness, Grammarly is my beta
genre: m/m/f or m/m/m
p.s. Oooh this was fun and funny to write. I'd be so flustered if they acted this way toward me. Hope y'all like it! Love ya ❤️
This party is horrendous. The food has no flavour, the alcohol isn't strong enough, and too many people are trying to flirt with you.
Viktor angrily sips on his champagne, his knuckles white at how hard he's holding the glass. Jayce's eyes are narrowed as he picks at the food he's attempting to eat.
All because some middle aged man with a heavily receding hairline is looking at you the way a lion looks at an antelope. Like your his prey.
“Whos turn is it now?” Jayce asks, eyeing the man down as he pops a cube of cheese into his mouth, “Mine.” Viktor states as he shoots back the rest of his champagne.
Jayce nods and Viktor casually walks over to where you're awkwardly standing. He completely understands why so many people are flirting with you. You have a sparkling personality and a gorgeous look. Beautiful on the inside and out.
Especially right now. You're wearing form-fitting black slacks, a billowy white shirt with an embroidered corset, showing off your waist and black loafers. Your hair is framing your face in a lovely way.
Your face is in a slight grimace as you sip champagne, leaning back away from the older man.
The man grunts in pain as Viktor whips his achilles tendon with an amazing aim, “Oh I'm so sorry,” Viktor apologizes, his tone full of fake concern, “I didn't mean to hit you, it was an accident.”
You huff lightly as your eyes glimmer at your lover, the older man looks cross. His face worsens at Viktors next words.
“I was coming over to see my partner and I accidentally stumbled. My bad.”
You hide your laugh behind your glass as the old mans face turns red in both anger and embarrassment. “You’re dating them?” He questions you, pointing incredulously at Viktor.
A hum is heard as you sip your champagne again, “I told you that five minutes ago, and you completely ignored me.”
The man sputters and essentially runs away. You and Viktor stand there in silence for a bit before the two of you laugh, and you continue to laugh as you walk back to Jayce.
Jayce's dark look has completely vanished, and he looks like a puppy now. Big smile, sparkling eyes, dimples out. If Jayce had a tail it'd be wagging a mile a minute.
“My heroes.” You croon at the two of them. A smirk on your lips as the two men fake innocence.
“I don't know what you're talking about?” Jayce says, his tone light and joking. You laugh and the two men smile at you. Ironically enough, now a woman comes up to talk to you. You groan in irritation and before the man can start talking to you, Jayce moves in front of you, the only thing you see is his deliciously broad back.
“They’re taken.”
The woman sputters, her eyes wide as her mouth opens and closes, “But—”
Jayce repeats himself, his tone firmer, darker.
“They’re taken, go away.”
The woman huffs and stomps away, her heels clacking harshly against the marble floor. Jayce sighs and falls back towards your side. Both you and Viktor smirk at the tall man. He looks confused.
“What?”
“Babe that was so sexy.” You tease.
“Got me hot under the collar.” Viktor adds, jokingly fanning himself. Jayce flushes all the way to his ears, grabbing a glass of champagne off the table and throwing it back.
“Shut up.”
The two of you laugh and Jayce's playful irritation melts away. He loves seeing the two of you laugh.
When another person comes up to talk to you the three of you groan. Jayce blocks you and Viktor again as you go to leave the party, the man doesn't read the room and goes to follow you two. Viktor subtly moves his cane a bit further out than normal and the man falls on his face.
You don't see anyone's reaction to his fall since you're already out the door, going back home.
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·
You sigh and try to take your corset off. You get mad at have a mini-tantrum. You're tired, you want to relax with your boys and slouch lazily on the couch. You can't do that with this corset.
You feel a large hand settle on your waist and slowly untie the laces in the back. You sigh in pleasure as the corset is loosened. It’s fitted to you perfectly, and its super comfy, but you don't have the best posture. So being forced to stand straight for a few hours has made your back sore.
You groan as you roll your shoulders, your back popping. You turn your head and kiss Jayce on the cheek.
Jayce smiles as you plop onto the couch next to Viktor, your shirt now much looser falls down your shoulder slightly. You untuck your shirt from your pants and it damn near falls down to mid-thigh. You unbutton your pants and shimmy out of them.
You're at home with your lovers, you're getting comfy goddamn it.
“What a show we're getting.” Viktor jokes as he lays a hand on your thigh, watching intently as you drop your head onto the back of the sofa. Jayce joins the two of you on the couch and kisses your bare shoulder.
“The amount of money those people at the party would pay to see you like this.”
“Theres not enough money in the world for me to leave you two.”
Viktor hums, “Is that so?” and brushes his nose against the crook of your neck, kissing, biting, and licking; leaving a dark hickey.
Jayce follows suit onto the other side.
You sigh in pleasure, “You two putting a claim on me? What? You two jealous of the people at the party?”
Jayce growls and Viktor chuckles, “Not jealous darling, possessive. We know you're ours, but it seems others don't.”
“So we’re rectifying that.” Jayce adds, nipping your jaw.
You just smile, wrapping one arm around each of them, “I’m not complaining. Rectify away!”
They both stop giving you hickies and both kiss your cheek at the same time, your face squishing together. Then the litter your face with kisses, making you giggle in elation.
Why on earth would you ever go from one of those people at the party when you have the best partners in the world?
No one could ever compare to them. No one.
You're the luckiest person in the world.
(On the other hand, Viktor and Jayce think they're the luckiest people in the world.)
Oh to be their partner in the arcane world. Why can't they exist irl 😭😭
Hope y'all enjoyed it, love ya ❤️
#arcane#arcane imagine#arcane x reader#viktor arcane#jayce talis#viktor x reader#viktor imagine#jayce x reader#jayce imagine#jayvik x reader#banners by cafekitsune
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min yoongi fic rec list (Ⅵ)
she's back bet you didn't think i'd post another list this quick but since they've been building so much i figured why not soooo this week is yoongs and next week with be taehyung i've been reading alot lately so i wanted to share them asap so before my week gets hectic again i thought i'd post it, i honestly loved these ones i am exploring a little bit for with certain genres and i must say it like a whole new world i'm enjoying it and i hope you like them too. remember too always show lots of love and support to these amazing writers they dedicated so much time to writing these fics and they are absolute geniuses and deserve the world for sharing them with us so please follow them and take a look at their masterlists cause i will 100% guarantee that you will find your very own favourites there as well, leave the a little comment i know they will appreciate it so much and send them all the love in the world... i will reblog these through out the week and as usual minors do not interact i will block those who do.... happy reading everyone see you next week with taehyung's list and if you have anything you would like to share with me or you just wanna ramble about a fic you loved my asks are always open i love hearing from you🖤✨
a- angst s- smut f- fluff
series
stalemate by @shina913 f s a
↬"The truth is, I'm not afraid to take that gamble anymore...in the off-chance that I get lucky again and feel the way I felt when I was with you. I'd happily make that bet over and over."
oh, my darling by @yoongiofmine f s a
↬ starting your second semester at one of South Korea’s most prestigious universities should be stressful enough. Between juggling classes, good grades and a social life, your plate was full. Hoping to spice up your academic career, you thought it was a good idea to enroll as an assistant for your literature professor, whom you've held a very secret and very forbidden crush on for the past several months. What will happen now that you’re forced to work closely together? And what if your crush isn’t as one sided as you thought?
little bit of your heart by @/yoongiofmine f s a ft. jjk
↬You had everything you could ever dream of; the career of your dreams as a music producer, the best friends you could ever wish for, and a exes-turned-friends-turned-fuck-buddies relationship with Min Yoongi. You knew you and Yoongi would never move past that and you were okay with it. Until a friend from your past comes back into your life, offering to give you everything you deserve, everything Yoongi couldn’t. Will Jungkook show you what you’ve been missing? Or will the new guy threaten Yoongi enough to do something about it?
sinful lust by @oddinary4bts s a ft. jjk
↬ in an attempt to spice up your bedroom life with your boyfriend Min Yoongi, you suggest bringing another man into the action. Yoongi seems reluctant at first, but when you mention his friend Jeon Jungkook, he can’t deny his attraction. All that’s left to do is to convince Jungkook into participating...
after hours by @archivedkookie f s a
↬ staying after hours with Yoongi for months proves to be a mistake when your heart falls for him.
Vows by @hamsterclaw f s a
↬ You're five years into your arranged marriage with Min Yoongi, and he's never once retaliated for anything you've done to him. One day you realise you've lost your appetite for provoking him, and you set about trying to win his heart instead.
sutures by @farfromsugafanfic f s a
↬ There was only one thing you and Min Yoongi had in common that night. You were both brokenhearted. You only intended to be together for one night, but when you both end up in the hospital the next day you discover that you are soulmates. It could kill you to be apart. As you and Yoongi attempt to sever the bond between you, will another be formed?
and so it goes by @prodagustd f s a
↬ You and Yoongi have been hooking up, having dates and spending most of the week together for almost seven months. He was comfortable without a title, until the last two weeks, when you couldn't see him because of your busy schedule, Yoongi can't understand why he misses you so bad if your relationship is just sex to him. Or maybe he does, but he's too much of a coward to admit it.
collateral by @theharrowing f s a ft. jjk & knj
↬ Your ex-boyfriend gets in over his head working for the local mafia, and Boss Min has come to collect his payment: You.
till death do us part by @colormepurplex2 s a
↬ Marital bliss isn't always a guarantee, especially when you find yourself marrying into the family responsible for your own family's demise. Sometimes, marriage is just a game of kill or be killed. Even when there is love involved, bullets still hurt.
grey area by @blushoseoks s a ft. jhs
↬ you spent the days staring at your wrist and tracing the skin where your soulmate’s name would one day appear. the nights were for telling your wrist about your day, as if the person whose name would one day stain itself there, like red wine to a dress, could possibly hear you. for years you thought up countless scenarios, imagined numerous possibilities, formulated conversations and rehearsed them over and over, until your mouth ran dry. outcomes and conclusions performed in your head on a repetitive loop. but out of everything you thought up, out of all of the time spent towards thinking about your soulmate, about what could possibly occur, none of it could ever prepare you for what would actually end up being. none of it ever came close to the way it happened when you finally met him. and now, after it’s all been said and done, you were left asking yourself one thing, and one thing only: “was it really worth all of this in the end?”
isn't it romantic by @jeonqkooks f s a
↬ Many things in life have a polar opposite: left and right, night and day, yin and yang, you and Min Yoongi... Hopeless romantic meets gloomy cynic. The only thing you seem to share is a magazine column but even then, you still can’t seem to understand how Yoongi can be called ‘The Love Doctor’ when he is the antithesis of everything love represents.
Flux by @yoonia f s a ft. jjk
↬ One of them is your longtime secret crush, while the other is the man with whom you had shared many heated nights filled with lust and forbidden desire, forever kept as your biggest secret of all time. You had sworn that those sinful nights would end, and that your secret crush would remain a secret. (poly au)
mean yoongi by @jjkpls f s
↬ Min Yoongi asks you to take care of his plants when he’s gone. It doesn’t go as planned and well, he has to deal with your misbehaving ass.
pretend by @gimmesumsuga s a
↬ “You know what they say: the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, right?” idol au infidelity
naughty little kitten by @jungkooksxo s a ft ksj
↬ Jin figures out that you’re super into the idea of Yoongi listening in on you two having sex. Yoongi is super into listening to you and Jin having sex. Jin invites Yoongi to come play with his naughty little kitten.
babydoll by @jungcock s a
↬ Your childhood crush, now famous and successful, comes to visit you while you’re drunk and have a lot to prove.
eleven months by @bratkook f s a
↬ it’s been years of yoongi living his routine life, accustomed to his pace of living, going with the flow and simply existing. until you come along. yoongi absolutely can not see the logic in the way you live, but he weirdly craves it. craves the feeling of not being afraid of not knowing what's coming, being able to just let the cards fall wherever they land. and maybe you can help with that.
pause by @whatifyoulivelikethat s a
↬ Life is like a cassette tape. It seems like it’s constantly repeating, flipped from side A to side B, and the songs can’t be skipped. You can only pause, rewind, fast forward, play after you’ve already heard the song. After you’ve already lived it. All Min Yoongi knows is his own tape, until it smashes right at his feet, and then he has to learn to dance to a different beat.
darksided by @eoieopda f s a
↬ It all started with a bad joke and a bottle of Tanqueray.
three squeezes by @nomnomsik s a ft jhs
↬ Yoongi is notorious for his grumpy and emotionless behavior as director of an upcoming company. Yet, it’s a mystery to everyone how manager Hoseok always seems to soften him up. The truth is that the two are actually engaged. Unknown to this fact, you happen to take an interest in Hoseok… and he does too.
one-shot
bad decisions by @jjungkookislife f s
↬ Jimin is desperate to get his apartment back to himself. He’ll move hell and earth, and even drop to his knees to beg you to take his brother, Yoongi, out of his hands. Who are you to say no to that pretty face and sinister grin?
breakfast in bed by @joonbird f s
↬ “Min Yoongi, a grumpy Ikea employee, is wondering who you are and why exactly you’re sleeping in the display bed at his Ikea.”
Tricks of the Trade by @stutterfly f s a
↬ The convenience store across the street from your apartment carries your favorite energy drink. That's why you frequent it. It's definitely not because you have a big fat crush on the owner you've been flirting with for the better part of a year. Of course your brand of flirting can also be misconstrued as bickering. When a strange man wanders into the store, he thinks you need a little nudge to embrace the strings connecting you. Next thing you know you're waking up in a body that definitely doesn't belong to you. You can't decide if it's the best or worst thing that's ever happened to you.
threads by @yoonia s a ft. knj
↬ Life is full of surprises, just like how people are full of secrets. Just when you had thought you have been lucky enough to have your life figured out, life decides to throw you a curve ball when you least expect it. And there is nothing you could do to avoid it, except to hope that you could hold your secrets as tightly as you possibly could before everything blows up into smithereens.
under the willow tree by @orchidyoonkook f a
↬ The town outcast shows up in the one place you find solace from it’s residents. The people you force yourself to fit in with, even though you never want to be anything like them. Will he ruin your only place of salvation, or become the most unlikely friend?
mami by kithtaehyung s ft. knj
↬ you somehow have a conversation with yoongi, and you tell your roommate about a date date.
the devil wears valentino by @orchidyoonkook f s a
↬ Having known him for years—from a small mistake on your behalf, and a favour on his—you’re one of the only people he seems to be able to put up with for company. Certainly the only one he’s half-way decent with. But what’s more surprising to you is that despite his name, reputation, and the fact he’s always joked he’d have killed anyone else by this point, is that he’s never once tried to cause you harm.
angel by @sailoryooons f s
↬ Yoongi never meant to keep coming back. You never meant to become Yoongi’s favorite. Being Min Yoongi’s favorite has dire consequences
a boy like you by @cinnaminsvga f
↬ for whenever you are feeling low, always remember that there is a boy you know who would lift the sky for you. {or alternatively: Min Yoongi loves you, though he never says it. He’s always been a firm believer in that actions speak louder than any words ever could.}
last nite by @tayegi s a
↬ This is a zombie apocalypse AU based on The Walking Dead, The Stand, World War Z, and elements of Attack of Titan
zombie bites by @luffles424 f s a
↬ Your friends have always been willing to assist you when you need a model to practice makeup on. And with the upcoming zombie film on campus is no difference. But something feels different this time, can a zombie movie be more than just a zombie movie?
heaven's winter by @jksangelic f s a
↬ your duty as the village daughter places you in line for the season’s Offering; a tradition not to tread lightly upon. as the snow falls slow and heavy, and the seraph awaits in the shallows of the mountain, you fail to realize what the winter has in store for you.
heavy sugar by @kinktae s
↬ The Roaring Twenties were a time of great economic wealth and social change. But beneath the jazz music and colorful speakeasies were mafia led organized crimes and bloodstained cash. You knew this well, but try as you might, you just couldn’t ignore the dark and enigmatic gangster whose eyes lingered on you from across the room.
all that holly, jolly shit by @daechwitatamic f s
↬You haven’t seen or heard from Yoongi since he broke your heart five years ago, laying out a logical list of reasons why you were better off breaking up. When a Christmas Eve blizzard traps you together for the night, you have no choice but to examine how few of those reasons are still true. And if they’re not… where does that leave you?
calling the shots by @chans-room f
↬ College basketball captain Yoongi
until death by @kpopfanfictrash s a
↬ Jade has always shaped the island of Kekon. Mined from the mountains, it enhances the abilities of Green Bone warriors who wear it and allows them protection from outside harm. No one understands these threats better than you do, second-in-command of the mighty No Peak clan. When a new danger appears, seeming to come from within, everything you once took for granted is called into question. Including the bonds you’ve made, some more dangerous than the others. None more so than Min Yoongi, head of No Peak and the only one capable of destroying your heart.
whatta catch by @aredheadedmess f a
↬ One, two, three strikes you’re out. When opposing opinions find you roughing it up with the university’s star pitcher, he makes it his mission to show that you’re wrong about college sports—and maybe your feelings about the player himself.
shatter me, embrace me by @95rkives s
↬you longed for him, yearning for love, yet all that awaited you was heartbreak.
you're losing me by @/archivedkookie a
↬ ❝ He’s losing you, and yet, he lets the flower die in front of his eyes instead of doing everything to save it. Alternatively, Yoongi and you are losing your love toward each other. ❞
spotlight by @back2bluesidex f a
↬ No matter how much you run away from Yoongi, Yoongi always comes right back to you.
all the wrong places by @mrworldwideshoulders f a
↬ After getting separated from your friends during a night out, you get stuck with a hefty bill – one that you can’t pay. So when a handsome, emotionless stranger covers your tab in a random act of kindness, you’re determined to track him down and pay him back. inspired by 24K Magic by Bruno Mars.
now we reign by @/oddinary4bts f s a
↬ when working on a collab together makes you and Min Yoongi seek comfort with the other, you discover there’s more to life than loneliness. Only, hurdles mark your path in Min Yoongi’s life, and it’s unclear what the outcome will be. Will you be destroyed by him and his world, or will you learn to reign over it, together with him?
stay by sugarwithtea f s a
↬ what happens when you get stranded in a remote town with no place to live except for a lodge owned by a dangerously handsome but annoying man? yeah, a lot.
when the stars align by @itskimtaehyung f
↬ With cuffing season approaching its end, you thought you had escaped the pressures of finding a boyfriend for the holidays. That is, until your friends set you up on a blind date that goes horribly wrong. This prompts you to enlist the help of your roommate, Yoongi, to fake a relationship so your friends will stop meddling in your love life. And it turns out Yoongi is a lot better at this romance thing than you originally thought...
egotstic by @pasteljeon s a ft. knj
↬ The timing was never right. He loved you when you were kids, knees scraped and cheeks red. You loved him when pimples bloomed across his skin, voice cracking and he found solace in the scribbled lines in his notebook. The stars never seemed to align for the two of you, but perhaps it was because you were meant for someone else.
on the court by @centerhaechan f
↬ As captain of your school's winning women's basketball team, it is only understood that you despise the men's basketball team and their captain. Your main rival, Min Yoongi, enjoys testing your patience while he attempts to lead his own team to a championship victory. Your coaches believe you both have problems with teamwork, and insist that working together will produce a promising solution.
sugar by @zehakoo f s
↬ desperately in need of sugar to make coffee in order to ease down your headache, you find yourself knocking on a strangers door who happens to be your best friend’s friend and the finest man you’ve ever encountered.
from the ashes by @fortunexkookie s a
↬ Someone is sobbing ugly, wrecked sounds that shatter the silence in the room. You need them to stop; it’s distracting and you need to focus. You need to clean the ash from his skin. You need to comb the knots from his hair. You need to dress his beautiful body in something befitting the king you know he is… but the sobbing is too loud, and your vision is blurry. It takes Yoongi wiping your tears away for you to realize that the gasping cries echoing off the stone are coming from you.
the dark by @/bratkook s
↬ your small town thrives on the occult, luring tourists in with endless themed festivities, but the only place you’re determined to see is the mysterious club that comes to life the week before Halloween. what makes The Dark so exclusive, and what secrets are they hiding behind closed doors?
Triplicity by @kainks ft. jhs
↬ Distance is a cruel thing, and when you find yourself going astray, they are there to help remind you of just where exactly you belong.
fermata by @jeongi f s
↬ fer·ma·ta: from fermare, it means to stay or to stop. min yoongi teaches you exactly how to let go.
private lessons by @dntaewithluv f s
↬ Your little sister finds it odd how you’ve been taking private lessons from her piano teacher for over a month now, but she hasn’t heard you actually play even once…
first love by @geniuslab f s a
↬You learn a lot of new things in your first year of university, including what it feels like to fall in love.

↬looking for other myg fics or the other bts members check out my library
#kiki!fic!rec#kiki's library#yoongi#yoongi fic recs#bts fic recs#bts yoongi#yoongi fanfiction#yoongi:fluff#yoongi:smut#yoongi:angst#yoongi:oneshot#yoongi:series#bts smut#yoongi series#yoongi smut#min yoongi#min yoongi fanfiction#favourites!myg#yoongi x reader#yoongi scenarios#yoongi x yn#yoongi fic#yoongi bts#yoongi fluff#yoongi angst
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A lapdog at a farm - chapter 5
<-former chapter -AO3 link -next chapter -> Call of duty. My ko-fi, Explicit, 18+, minors do not interact. read the tags. WC: 6.3k
tags: Rape/non-con elements, dub-con, dog!hybrid!people being kept as pets, alternative universe - farm, dark, farmer!John Price, working-dogs, punishments, mating cycles/rut/heat (no omegaverse), the dove isn't dead but its dying, it dies later on, reader is a brat, knotting, animal tails and ears, mentions of trauma, violence, angst, hurt/comfort, collars, rough sex, breeding kink, biting, threesome, foursome, everyone is fucking your honor, enemies to lovers, chubby reader, reader has a pussy
MDNI. MDNI. Dead dove do not eat.
Authors note: do note there will be the use of prong collars in this. Just like all the other fucked up stuff in this, i don't support that irl, but this is fiction. On a different note, it will probably be at least a week before I can give you another chapter lol, shit is happening, my sinners and im holding on. Also thank u to all the nice asks and comments ive been sent. means a lot <33. ENJOY!
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You could only stay in the farmhouse for so long; even though you desperately wanted to stay inside, Price dragged you outside, talking about fresh air and enjoying nature.
To you it was nothing but lies and the smell of animal shit.
There were no pavements, no cars flashing by, no advertisements or shops, no scents of food or sweets trying to lure you in. There were no hybrid clothes shops, where John would play dress up with you for his next party. Show him how the lingerie set he picked out looked against your tail.
He would make sure your nails were always perfect and manicured. Without the claws, he made sure you knew you were loved anyways, your nails adorned with expensive nail polish and gemstones. Anything that his Daisy, his princess, his darling, his puppy wanted, she always got.
Now you were here, following him into the stables, to see how far Nikolai - who had forced himself into your life - was with the tractor.
Warily looking out for the hybrids, staying close to your owner.
The stitches were gone and everything was healed all nicely - that didn’t mean that you wanted to start over and get more bites that would need stitches. Once was enough. Hopefully Price and Nikolai understood that too.
Also, you didn’t want to get fucked dumb by those mutts again; they didn’t deserve your pussy. Especially not Ghost or Gaz. Not really Soap either, he had just been nice because he had to. You were sure. They were nothing but stupid working dogs, who didn’t know how to behave.
Your owner, John Price, looked in love; he was watching Nik just as much as he was watching the tractor. The stress that had sometimes followed him home when you lived in the city was no longer visible. It had left his bones, made him happy and pliable, clearly blossoming in his new role as a farmer. You loved him but what the fuck were you supposed to do with this whole situation? Pretend to be happy?
You were a pet, so it wasn’t like you had any options. And your attempts at persuading him to move back to the city hadn’t gone well. Resisting your ever present urge to let him fuck you, would probably not do you any good. Earn you a spanking from both him and Nikolai. They might even throw you to the hounds.
One of those said hounds were getting closer to you, the hybrid making you tense up a little.
“You’re looking good, princess,” Gaz said casually, shooting you an awfully charming smile, his tail wagging while you tipped your ears backwards instead of replying.
“Feeling better?”
You didn’t reply, merely stared at the tractor, boring as it was. Maybe if you ignored him, he would go away. He stepped closer to you, his dark gaze resting on you, while you stepped closer to John, growling as a warning.
“Behave,” Price said over his shoulder, clearly more interested in that Russian man of his, than your safety.
It only took another step and Gaz’s teeth a tad too close to you, to send you bolting out. Back inside it was then, you concluded, enough farming bullshit for today.
Only to meet Ghost in the way, his scarred face grinning smugly, ears tipping towards you.
“‘Ello pup.”
Nah, you weren’t fucking with that today. You managed to see the shadow of Soap before you bolted again.
Running still wasn’t your best talent; so though you knew it was stupid, you decided to do what you weren’t allowed to anyways. You crawled the wooden fence, ignoring the male hybrids' shouts and barks — as well as the fence’s slight squeak - and landed on the other side with a grunt.
The corns were tall and you took a breath, looking over your shoulder, only to see a worried looking Soap being the closest.
He let out a concerned whimper.
“Dinnae lass,” he warned, a softness in his voice that you recognized from your moments inside.
You would deal with the consequences and the punishment that Price would give you for leaving the ground. It was better than getting your shoulders bitten to pieces - so you got up and rushed into the tall corn field. Abandoning the male hybrids.
Stupid. They were all stupid.
Maybe this should be your new go-to hiding spot. You could hear them bark aggressively but not getting nearer. They weren’t allowed to leave either. You felt your chest swell a little with pride over the idea. You wouldn't be gone for long, just until they lost interest in you.
It was several seconds before you stopped, panting with your tongue out. You couldn’t see the fence or the farm from all the corn by now, which finally meant some peace. Your tail wagged and your body relaxed, a soft wind playing with your fur for a moment, making the corn move around you, like waves in the ocean.
However, that peace didn’t last long.
“My my,” the voice almost appeared out of nowhere and you turned slowly, unsure but still afraid of what you would see, “what are you doing here, perrita? On my property?”
You knew Alejandro and Rodolfo had gotten a hybrid, but you had been too swept up in your own nightmare to ask about her; now, as she towered above you, seeming more wolf than dog, you would rather have one of the mutts on your own farm. A scared little whimper escaped you.
“You must be Price’s precious lapdog, no?” She asked, slowly moving in between the corn with ease, as she circled around you, fear making you stay still, “a little city puppy, forced to be out on a farm. How sad.”
There was no trace of sympathy in her voice. It took you a moment to swallow some spit and another moment to take a proper breath.
“I’ll go home again, I’m sorry.” You tried your best to seem submissive, leaning forward a little, tail tugged along your leg. You at least had your owner at the farm - but here? Here, with this new, wolf-like hybrid, you didn't have anyone. You weren’t even supposed to be here, weren’t allowed. Sure, you knew Alejandro and Rudy, but they also knew you weren’t supposed to be there.
“Hmmm,” she answered in a rumble, licking her teeth slowly, casually showing off her fangs, “what’s your name, perrita?”
She screamed danger. Her energy screamed ‘I can make worse wounds than them’ and you certainly didn’t feel like testing that. In fact, you would rather get as much distance between you and her as possible.
“D-Daisy.” It was the name Price had chosen, not that you were really called it. But you weren’t going to tell this hybrid woman who looked like she could swallow you whole, that you were usually called princess, pretty girl, puppy or sweetheart.
“I’m Valeria,” she replied, finally stopping her circling, only to step closer to you. She wasn’t really that tall, but her energy was as if she was, she had strong arms and legs; scars littered her too, her hair short, ears big and tipped forward without a care in the world. Her collar was thick and sturdy, opposed to your own fancy one.
You almost wanted to point out that yours was prettier. That you were a lapdog, not one of the working ones, that you were not made to be played rough with. That you were no threat.
You could hear barking in the distance. Voices calling out for you. Even though you hadn’t met Valeria for more than a minute, you already knew you wanted to get a good distance between you and her.
“Uh nice to meet you, but I better get back home, sorry-“ you turned around quickly but before you could even think to bolt, strong arms were around you and the other dog hybrid pulled you close to her chest.
“Eres tan linda e ingenua,” she almost lovingly growled into your ear, and while you didn’t understand what she was saying, you were much more distracted by her tongue. She licked your cheek a couple of times, slow and wet strokes; you got the feeling that she might eat you raw without regret and you twisted a little in her grip, letting out a louder growl. She laughed, one of her hands pawing at your tit, claws sinking into the fabric. She smelled of danger and lust; like the mutts at home when they first got their dirty paws on you.
“I’m gonna enjoy me—“
“VALERIA!” Her name echoed through the fields, making both of you freeze. Like a warning rushing in between the corns, her name couldn’t be ignored.
She growled deeply, seeming annoyed with the disturbance, while you wanted to kiss whoever of your neighbors it was. She rolled her hips, humping your ass twice, before she was interrupted again.
“Valeria!” It was Alejandro, you realised then, who yelled once again, “ sé que la tienes! Let her go!”
With one deep sniff of you, while you whimpered, the wolf-looking hybrid finally let go of you.
“I won’t be as nice next time, perrita - now go, before I change my mind and take you from your boys.”
You didn’t need to be told that again and didn’t want to argue that they weren’t your boys - the moment she let go, you bolted towards the way you came.
How they knew that she had gotten a hold of you wasn't clear, but it wasn’t like you were gonna turn around and ask Alejandro or Rudy.
The answer came to you anyways; one angry looking John Price stood with crossed arms, phone in hand. A grinning Nikolai next to him and three growling hybrids moving back and forth along the men and the fence. Every single one of them stilled and stared at you as you sheepishly walked to the fence, tail between your legs and ears tipped down.
You stood, just for a moment, with the fence in between you and the others. Considering staying there, as if that would be a good solution.
“Get your arse over here,” Price snapped, his voice stern and dark, as he put his phone in his pocket, marching towards you.
You hastily and in a rather inexperienced manner, climbed the fence and got to the right side. Instantly, tears welled up in your eyes and you let out a whimper, almost ready to tell about the horrors you had just been through - only to bark loudly at the hybrids as they all charged towards you, hands touching you, only stopped by a sharp whistle.
“Nyet,” Nikolai called harshly, “off her. Now.”
Soap and Gaz instantly let go, stepping back as John reached you, but Ghost didn’t move. His hand rested on your neck, pressing your collar against your skin, his nose almost fully pressed against your temple.
“Let go.” Price’s voice was sharp and you let out a little whimper- not sure who of them you would rather deal with right now.
“She smells wrong,” Ghost replied, not moving, but his voice not as harsh as it could be, “smell of her.”
Her. You didn’t know whether Valeria would be in trouble over this or not. You had been the one to step into her territory anyways. She wasn't the one who had jumped a fence after all.
“We will fix that.”
Ghost let out a grumble but after two seconds of staring at each other, the hybrid finally let go of you, earning himself a swift “Good boy.”
Then Price grabbed into the ring in your collar and pulled, ignoring how you instantly broke into tears, excuses and explanations spilling from your lips like a waterfall, desperate to avoid punishment. You didn't want to stay with Valeria, but you didn’t want this either.
You were dragged past Nikolai who shared a short glance with Price - and they gave each other a short nod.
“C’mon boys,” Nikolai then called, the hybrids instantly moving to him, even though you could feel them staring at you, “we’re gonna join them.”
They were what? You cried harder, tugging at John’s arm, your owner ignoring your pleads and cries.
“I’m sorry sir, I got scared, I didn’t mean to run away,” you babbled, every second word followed by a small sob or whine, tail between your lets, almost making it hard to walk normally, “ they scared me, I was gonna come back, I’ll be good sir, I’ll behave! I wasn’t running away!”
There was no mercy from your owner, who just marched you towards the farmhouse that had almost become home by now.
If someone had told you a year ago that you would be a dog on a farm by now, surrounded by working hybrids, you would have laughed in their face. Loudly and impolitely.
You? Pretty lapdog living in the city out on a farm?
You weren’t even at the house yet, somehow crying harder because you felt so sorry for yourself in general. You were such a perfect lapdog, such a perfect being, forced to be out here, in the cold countryside. A tragedy.
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The prong collars looked like they would choke too and you wanted to scream merely at the sight.
“I’m not running the risk of having my darling all bitten to pieces again - this will hopefully help you to remember.”
None of them seemed too happy about it; you couldn’t blame them, you wouldn’t want those either, but you were horrified by the idea of getting bitten as harshly as they did last time. If both Price and Nik hadn’t been there, you doubted it would be possible to get the collars on them.
You were still crying yourself, from the shame of having jumped over the fence and creating chaos, only resulting in this.
The moment they were allowed, they were on you, ignoring your whimpering and fingers trying to push them off - Soap was the nicest, helping you get your clothes off instead of letting the others rip them, even if all of them were obsessed with your smell. Or well, with how you smelled of Valeria to be exact.
Soap licked your cheek and you growled at him, tipping your ears back, trying to push him away, fingers against his chest; but he didn’t move, only pressed himself closer, growling back to prove he was stronger than you - that you were supposed to be submitting to him.
“They shouldn’t be this aggressive,” you heard Price point out to Nikolai, but you were too distracted by Soap grinding his still clothed crotch against your poor, exposed cunt - you whined his name, but he didn’t stop.
“Gonn’ mark ye, hen,” he promised in a murmur, teeth sinking into your jaw for just a moment - a warning tug in the leash made him let go almost instantly, instead licking the spot a couple of times, “gonn’ make ye smell all bonnie again.”
Both Gaz and Ghost were barking, but they were both held by the collars by Price and Nik, kneeling next to them, clearly antsy.
“-are working dogs-” it was hard to hear them, over your own mind buzzing so much, over the barks and the pleasure that you hated, “-hierachy is importa-”, one of Soap’s hands disappeared and a moment later, you heard his fly get tugged down, “show them where the line is, so–”
You howled in a high pitched tone as he forced his cock inside you, making you twist and try to push Soap okay. The stretch was intense, burning despite how wet you felt. “It's okay, bonnie lass,” Soap growled, forcing his cock a little deeper into you, nosing at your shoulder, near one of your scent glands, his hands moving to grab onto your thighs, “we’re nae gonna hurt ye.”
You both knew it was a lie - but you at least trusted Soap a little more than the two other mutts who were watching, knowing he could control himself. They were barely able to sit still, tongues out, almost drooling, while their eyes were dark in a way that reminded you of that time in the shed.
He forced his cock deeper, the knot finally reaching the opening of your poor, stretched cunt and you let out a sound at the fear of it sliding inside you. The scent of Soap was already beginning to overwhelm the scent that Valeria had left behind against your will - a part of you wished you had fought her more, had attempted to hurt her more.
The cry that left you was pained and afraid - his fangs almost having forced its way through your skin; you were only saved by John, who pulled Soap back by the collar, the prongs digging into the hybrid’s skin.
“Behave, boy,” John snarled while a mixture of a whine and a growl left Soap, as he helplessly pawed at the collar, “No breaking skin - already told you.”
“‘m sorry, sorry,” he promised, a pained tone to his voice, “dinnae mean tae.”
You doubted it was true; there was a darkness in the air despite the way your owner tried handling them.
He was let go off and the moment the prongs didn’t painfully dig into his skin, he was on you again, tongue on the indent he had left, his cock pressed into you again, his tail wagging.
“‘m sorry,” he barely managed to say in between his licks and moans, before his hands were back on you, his moaning louder, as he ignored your whines of slowing down. Your own hands grabbed onto his mohawk and ears, but the hybrid did nothing but moan even louder, moving his hips a little upwards and fuck - he hit the perfect spot, grinning like a feral hound when he noticed and heard your sounds.
You came against your will, crying out and spasming around him, his hands grabbing harder onto your thighs, claws teasing the skin.
He was panting and moaning like a hound, mounting you like there was nothing in his mind but the feeling of your cunt.
“Gonna fill ye up,” Soap promised, words barely escaping his mouth, drool dripping down on you; not like you cared, too gone yourself to really do so.
“DON'T knot her,” Price’s word cut through the air like a sharp knife, slicing into your mind; you wanted him to knot you, a part of you realized, no you needed him too - while another screamed in delight of not having to be stuck to him.
“Nnngh,” his hips were going so fast it almost hurt as they clashed against your skin, “please sir, please plea—“
“No.”
The hand that appeared made you shudder - and then a second later, Soap came, almost a guttural scream leaving him; you could feel Price’s fingers near your cock, stopping him from sliding his knot into you.
“Later,” Price answered, then pulling Soap back by the collar and hair, your own hands slipping easily from him, “we don’t have the time to wait for all of you to knot her right now.”
The moment he was pulled away, you moved, whimpering and curling to the side, wincing as cum slid out from your pussy; it wasn’t John’s, you wanted it to be your owners. You barely had time to breathe before Nik released one of the others. Gaz pushed you onto your stomach - one hand on your neck to keep you down as you snarled.
“Wait,” you barked, ears tipping down “lemme breathe, for fucks sake—“
“Need you, puppy,” Gaz merely replied, grabbing onto your collar and tugging, his other hand pulling on your tail, ignoring your yelp, “gonna make it all okay again.”
“Nothing happened-“ you snarled, trying to make him let go, but you separately rose to your knees in order to levitate the pressure on your tail.
“Why did you smell like her then, huh?” He all but snarled, finally letting go of your collar, to push down his own pants, “stinking of her lust!”
You tried twisting to grip onto his ears to tug at them, hoping it would make him let go of you but he merely let go of you fully for a moment - your wrists were caught by his hands and he slammed them against the wooden floor.
“Be nice, собака,” Nik warned him, “I’m in no mood for broken bones.”
You barely heard him nor Gaz’ aggressive reply; you were too busy, having a realization.
They were jealous ; you weren’t sure why it had taken you so fucking long to realize. The three mutts were jealous somebody else, somebody they didn’t know, had touched you and hadn’t you been so fucking upset, you might have laughed.
Instead, you felt a cock forcing its way into your cunt, making you howl in pleasure against your will; the slide was easier this time as Gaz fucked you, as you were already wet from the round with Soap - and now with his cum as well, Gaz fucked you almost smoothly. If not more aggressively than Soap had.
It didn’t take long before his teeth sank into your skin, the first two seconds it was nothing more than an extra grip, his cock roughly thrusting into you as if attempting to move your organs, his drool sliding along your skin, mixing with your sweat. His claws were digging into your skin slightly, but even more into the floor - while you were a mess, panting and attempting to growl in between your pathetic moans, barely able to see straight.
The pressure he bit you with changed quickly however and suddenly you were whining in pain, so loudly that you almost didn’t recognize your own voice.
Apparently Gaz had tried to bite Price in aggression over being ripped away from ‘his bitch’ as Nik called it, and you heard the harsh words and slaps, while you sank down a little, your tits pressed against the cold floor, your cunt empty.
He was back as soon as he disappeared though, pulling you up again, only to almost instantly try to bite you again – halfway pulled away once more. You looked over your shoulder, seeing how the prong collar dug into his skin for a short moment until Price let go of him again.
The moment he was back, you turned however, using the moment to grab onto one of his long, dark ears and tug; it was almost a squeal that left Gaz and you heard both the hybrids bark and growl, Nik saying something – but it was the harsh spank from the leather leash that made you loosen your grip.
“Behave, Princess,” John was squatting down next to you, strong hand on your pretty collar; it stood out so violently when compared to the others’ current prong collars, “or I’ll get you a collar too.”
“They’re mean!” you whimpered, giving him your best puppy eyes, before sending Gaz an angry look, as he was barely held back by John.
“Well you’re not quite playing nice either, eh?” There was a slight amusement in his voice but you didn’t get to comment on it, before he moved again.
Price gave Gaz more leash and the hybrid was instantly on you again, but this time Price didn’t let go of the metal ring in your own collar, keeping you in place, as if to remind you to behave; to remember he was right here, calling the shots.
“Yeah, Princess,” Gaz mocked, pushing into your cunt again with a moan, the movement in his hips exposing the fact that he was wagging his tail, “Behave.”
“Shut up!” you hissed angrily, a tug in the collar reminding you that Price was right there.
Gaz’ hands were mostly on your hips - he nuzzled against your back and neck, licking your shoulders and in between your shoulder blades - he bit you a couple of times, but they were barely anything more than nips, a gentle tug on his collar reminding him to behave.
Then one of his hands moved, almost catching you off guard and making you whimper - it slid beneath your stomach, pawing at it for a moment, before it found its way to your cunt where the two of you were still connected, his thrusts still hard; he touched your clit without hesitation, snarling out words you could barely recognize. Mercilessly forcing you towards another orgasm.
Price let go of your collar and you let your head slumber down against the floor, wincing at the small pool of drool that had been created, hating how you pushed back against Gaz, the dual pleasure of his cock hitting that right spot and the fingers on your clit, so good you could barely breathe.
You barely heard Price’s command of not knotting you, from the mere tsunami of pleasure that overtook your body as you came, a howl that barely made any sound, snapping of your teeth and the pawing at the floor. You tightened around his cock, the knot having been so close, oh so close to being forced into your over oversensitive cunt - but then it was pulled out of you, almost making you sob.
Cum spurted on top of your lower back and ass cheeks, before Gaz willingly went - you could hear the almost instant sound of him and Soap making out with each other. And there was only one person back, which meant you had to go now.
A hand grabbed onto your ankle, dragging you backwards as you managed to crawl forwards a few steps - you turned around, back on the floor, raising your opposite leg to kick Ghost in the face, but the other hybrid caught it easily; grinning at you, almost feral-like, lust heavy in the air. Sometimes you forgot they had been in the military for so long.
Leather connected to your skin once more, this time on your raised thigh, a whine leaving you, your eyes flickering to look up at John who stood with the leash curled in his hand, ready to spank you with it once more.
“behave,” John hissed at you, while Ghost chuckled. Idiot.
You didn’t have much time to argue, Ghost letting go of your ankles, just to grab onto your thighs and pull you closer; he was kneeling, almost pulling you into his lap, that feral grin still there, fangs exposed.
He leant over you much quicker than you had anticipated, ignoring your growling and snapping with teeth - one hand resting next to your head, the other pulling down his boxers, pants already open.
Was his cock this big last time? It was like you couldn’t remember the last time right now, you could barely think, in fact, your mind was overwhelmed with so many things. Pleasure, oversensitivity, pain and anger - his dick seemed inhumanely long.
“Not so snappy now, huh?” he crooned, voice low, his free hand grabbing onto your plush thigh, fingers digging into the fat, ears tipped towards you as he spoke, “cockdumb already?”
“nnngh,” you tried pushing at his clothed chest, twisting in his grip, but it was no use; it was like the cock inside you kept you from doing anything. Somehow you managed a small “shutup” and that was enough to set Ghost going.
“Gonna teach you to not go whoring again,” Ghost snarled against your skin, tongue sloppily leaving a wet trail of spit over one of your bouncing tits, simply ignoring your hands trying to push his face out of the way, a plethora of moans and small yaps leaving you as he didn’t stop fucking you with that monster cock of his. You knew you were being watched, both by your owner and his boyfriend, as well as the two other hybrids, it only added to the humiliation of being turned on.
“Belong to us,” his words were barely audible as he growled them, the wet sounds and rustling of his clothes seeming to overtake it, “not her.”
“I won’t, won’t go, won–” you were barely aware of the words slipping from your lips, the volume rising as you felt his teeth scrape against a spot on your shoulder over your right breast, “nonon, please, I wont–”
“Ghost–” Price’s warning was stern, the little tug in the prong collar making him grumble, licking over the spot a couple of times - your eyes met.
Ghost’s eyes almost seemed like they wanted to own you too; as if it was no longer John who you bowed to, but the pack that you didn’t want, on a farm you didn’t want to be. His thrusts quickened and then his eyelids lowered together with his head – biting down into your skin.
Despite his fast attempt at breaking your skin, mauling your flesh into his, Price was quicker – pulling him back by the collar. He held an extra grip on his hair and you managed to look up, see through the tears.
It was like there was a flood in your ears, Price looking mad, Ghost’s ears tipping backwards as he spoke.
Fighting to get some air into your lungs, you panted and tried wiggling free. Ghost’s fingers merely dug deeper into your plush thigh even though he was currently pulled back by the prong collar, the tips of his claws pressing against your skin as a warning.
The moment he let go, Ghost was back at it, staring down at you with a dark smile, grunts and small moans even leaving him. It took a couple of moments before Price let him have enough leash to bend down over you again and this time Ghost growled into your ears instead of your skin. Licking your furry ears while you whimpered at the feeling and the words.
They owned you; were going to breed you, use you, keep Valeria away, and do whatever they needed to keep you. You were theirs. The moment you let us, he had panted, we will love you.
There was an odd feeling in your stomach, almost as if you were going to piss yourself, but with no mercy from any of the men, one of your hands dug into his short hair and the other grabbed onto his shoulder as you screamed.
It had been a while since you squirted and it took you by surprise, just as it did the others. There were several barks, voices but then Ghost was fucking you even harder than before, bordering on painful, forcing his mouth against yours. You came a second time, this time not squirting but it almost felt more intense.
Ghost came just a moment later, perhaps caught by surprise himself, but he made sure not to knot you.
The world was spinning around you. There were teardrops in your lashes as you squinted up at the hybrid, who was still pushed inside you. Price’s hand petting him shortly on the head before pulling him back.
There was speech but you barely noticed - then strong hands pulled you up into a lap. The overpowering scent of leather and oil told you who it was and despite your slight hate for Nik, your tail wagged as he pulled you into his arms, cooing at you.
“Such a strong puppy,” he praised, one of his hands drying away some of your drool, caressing your cheek as he sat on the floor with you on his lap, cum no doubt dripping onto his clothes, “you deserve treat for being so good, da?”
Compared to the first time you had met Nikolai, you didn’t want to bite his hand anymore - he clearly didn’t fear you doing so either. You snuggled into his hand, nodding as you squinted up at him, a small “uh-huh” leaving you.
His hand disappeared and then there was a faint rustling of plastic - even without seeing it, you smelled it. It was that mouthwatering scent that made you weak in your knees that first time and your nose instantly sniffed, almost trying to sit up further to get a look of where it was - to get it before the boys did. Nikolai laughed, letting out a “there you go, milaya,” letting you grab the piece of jerky from his finger, instantly sinking your teeth into it with a pleased sigh. Your tail wagging a little again as you heard Soap whining over not getting a piece.
You even had to take a bath with them afterwards. Your life was officially over - you made sure to tell Price that, who just huffed and rolled his eyes. Sure, you weren’t the biggest fan of showers, but you wanted the cum off and you wanted a bath in the tub… alone. That was your thing.
“- ‘nd they’re gonna use up my shampoo and my conditioner -” you continued overdramatically as Nik carried you in front of John, the russian man merely snorting at your pitiful complaining.
“We’ll buy more-” John tried to point out, but to no avail, life might as well be over for you right now.
“- ‘nd my brushes - all my nice brushes!”
“I will be sure tae use yers, Mo ghràdh,” Soap happily proclaimed, sending you a wink, fully naked as he was, his usual collar back on, small red marks on his neck from where the prongs had been, “I will use theim the wrong way. Just fer ye.”
Gaz snickered and even Ghost let out a chuckle.
“Jooohn,” you whined, only struggling a little as Nik sat you down in the tub, the water already nice and warm, your poor body having needed this, “I’m gonna need new brushes.”
“I doubt that, Princess,” he cooed, petting your hair, “Now who wants to join in th–”
Soap was in the tub, sliding in behind you before John could even finish his question, happily ignoring your pout and growl.
“Dinnae be like that,” he crooned, “where is yer special shampoo?”
This day had been awful.
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
“Princess.”
You almost jumped as the voice called for you and you turned, squinting slightly in suspicion at the sight. Gaz stood in the doorway, all calmly, looking at you, playing a little with his gloves. He didn’t look aggressive and didn’t smell turned on; in fact, he looked pretty harmless, his tail wagging ever so slightly, ears turning towards you and an almost shy smile.
“What?” you asked, sitting up in the dog bed, crossing your arms, not caring about sounding nice, looking him over for a moment before adding, “you’re dragging in mud.”
He looked down at his shoes, letting out a little ‘oh’. They weren’t really supposed to be in here, so you didn’t really understand why Gaz stood there. You didn’t really care either.
The other might be beautiful, but he was still not one of your favorite people.
“I - want to show you something,” he finally said, one of his charming smile appearing, though it was a little more careful this time, “Soap said you would probably like it.”
“What is it?” You didn’t sound too impressed.
“It's a surprise,” he smiled a little more.
“If it's your knots, then you can–”
“Jeez,” he rolled his eyes, as if they weren’t fucking you silly on the livingroom floor the other day, “it’s not. Nothing like that.”
“Promise?”
“I do,” he answered, wagging a little more than before, “Swear on my tail.”
"Hm. Where is it?”
“In the barn.”
You scrunched your nose at the mention of the barn, the idea of being stamped to death by a horse already scaring you.
“It’s nothing scary - I wouldn’t bring you if it was.”
You let out a sigh, before getting up - he went to the hallway again and you followed, stealing one of John’s jackets as well as a pair of his boots, before following Gaz outside.
“Some air would do you good once in a while, ya’ know,” Gaz said after a few moments, “we’re not that bad all of the time, Princess.”
You huffed, wondering for a moment if you should just turn around and go back. “You haven’t really proved me otherwise.”
He let out a hum that almost sounded agreeable but opened one of the doors to the barn, ushering you inside.
“It’s all good, I promise,” he said once more and you reminded yourself, that if he tricked you, you were going to snap off his tail. Pretty as it was.
He steered you to a booth where you noticed the heat lamp at first, more than anything else - but then you saw them, letting out a little gasp.
Tiny baby goats, all snuggled together in the hay beneath the lamp. A few of the mothers stood nearby and one of them came to the door of the booth, sniffing at Gaz’ hand, before letting out a bleat - then turning around again.
“They’re adorable,” you whispered, looking back at the babies, some of them looking at you, others sleeping with no worries in the world.
“Aren’t they?” Gaz asked with a smile, “They were born yesterday night. Come.”
You let out a scared sound as Gaz opened the door to the booth.
“Won’t the mothers attack us?” you didn’t like how Gaz chuckled to your genuine, fearful question but he shook his head.
“Nah, me ‘nd the others hang out with the animals all the time.” He explained, petting one of the mothers who came to greet him for a moment.
It was cute. You had to admit that, even with your limited love of the farm animals.
“But I don’t.” you pointed out, still standing in the door of the booth, afraid to step into the hay and join the other as he sat down next to the baby goats.
“No, but the mothers know I won’t let a predator near,” he explained gently, “Not at daytime and not during the night.”
“Oh.”
There was something special over this that you could not explain. You didn’t want to explain it. You sat down next to Gaz as he patted the spot, still a little unsure about the momma goats - but none of them battered an eye as Gaz took your hand and made you gently pet one of the babies.
“They’re so tiny,” you whispered, almost to yourself, for once not hating or fearing Gaz. At least for right now, you were just in a moment together with him, doing something that you hadn’t expected would be that nice.
#boolger#my writing#fanfiction#call of duty#cod fanfic#a lapdog at a farm fic#lapdog#a lapdog at a farm#call of duty fanfic#cod smut#hybrid!141#hybrid!reader#hybrid!au#dark fanfiction#dark!fic#simon ghost riley x reader#hybrid reader#soap x reader#gaz x reader#price x reader#nikolai x john price#johnny soap mctavish x reader#johnny soap mactavish#reader x kyle gaz garrick#kyle gaz garrick#taking turns#mention of breeding#dark content#dead dove fic
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Time After Time – Chapter 10
Summary: Unable to control your abilities, you’re stuck in the present with Billy Butcher, his team, and America’s first asshole. At this point, you’ve become Soldier Boy’s personal punching bag. But when an accident leaves you stranded in 1942, you run into a familiar face and suddenly rely on your future tormentor’s help as your only hope.
Pairing: Soldier Boy x supe!Reader
Warnings: 18+ for language, attempted assault & smut, reader is a supe with chronokinesis (time manipulation), 1942 says BYE, SB being a nice and kind human, a bit of humor, fluff, a lot of exes, heavy dose of angst
Word Count: 11.0k
Posted on Patreon May 3, 2025
A/N: Sorry for the delay, guys! Baby boy was not cooperating with me at all this week lol. Ready to say goodbye? Deep breaths, babes 😘 ✨ Chapter title comes from Casablanca (1942)
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Chapter 10: Here's Looking at You, Kid
The kitchen of the mansion had always run on the domestic diplomacy of Dottie’s sharp tongue, the tireless shuffle of Florence’s feet, and the way Frances could carry an entire roast duck, a tray of petits fours, and a silver bucket of ice without breaking a sweat or a smile.
Today was no different.
At half past noon, it was cooler in the kitchen. Not by much, not in July, but the oven heat was at least a familiar warmth compared to the rest of the house.
The room itself, however, was a whirlwind of flour and steam and shouted orders, while you were tucked into the corner by the island, looking marginally useful with a tray of unfrosted cupcakes in front of you and a star-tipped piping bag in your hands.
Earlier, you’d almost sliced a finger cutting strawberries – not that it would’ve done anything. You probably would’ve only broken the knife.
“Lord save us,” muttered Florence, snatching the bag from your trembling grip with all the grace of someone removing a stick of dynamite from a child. “You’re gonna frost the whole counter with that tremor in your hand.”
She wasn’t wrong.
At least, you looked nice. Your navy A-line dress was crisp, belted neatly at the waist with white that hinted at patriotism. You had even let Dottie do your hair that morning, which explained the intricate braid with a silky red bow in your locks.
Outside the windows, the grounds looked like a dreamscape – white tents rising like clouds against the green lawns, waitstaff in black and white bustling with trays like chess pieces, patriotic bunting draped across columns and fences, and a jazz trio already tuning up near the terrace.
One hour from now, the estate would be crawling with old money – Philadelphian coal royalty and their wives in fox furs and peep toes, oil barons from the Main Line, and of course, the Du Ponts.
“You’re gonna wear a hole in that chair if you keep fidgeting, honey,” Dottie teased, kneading dough with a firm grace that would make a ballerina blush.
“I’m not fidgeting. I’m merely… anticipating,” you replied and twisted your fingers in your lap some more.
“You’re anticipatin’ the way a turkey anticipates Thanksgiving,” Frances muttered with a snort, brushing egg wash over a tray of tiny apple pies.
“She’s calming her nerves, leave her be,” Florence threw in, icing cupcakes with practiced flicks. “I’d be twitchy too if half of Philadelphia came into my house with an eye on my man.”
Comforting.
“I wouldn’t worry,” Frances said instantly. “That dumb boy looks at her like he’s confusing her for oxygen.”
“Like a man lost in the dark sea, swimming toward a lighthouse,” Dottie added, smirking and proud of herself.
You groaned and tilted your head with narrowed eyes. “Why do I like you three again?”
“Because we know where the whiskey’s hidden, and we’ve seen you after two glasses,” Dottie sassed without missing a beat.
When Margaret then entered the kitchen, you didn’t jump, but you did straighten your spine like a schoolgirl waiting for inspection, even though she helped you pick out your dress and coached you as best as she could.
Ben’s mother wore a seafoam silk dress that did something devastating to her figure, her dirty blonde hair in a soft twist. Her peach lipstick even matched the carnations in the centerpieces.
“Oh, haven’t you been busy bees! Good Lord, it smells like Versailles in here,” Margaret said, grinning a little, waving at the heat. “Is there any air left, or did my husband’s ego suck it all up when he came downstairs this morning?”
Frances covered a laugh with a cough. Dottie didn’t even bother hiding hers.
“Afternoon, ma’am,” Florence said warmly, wiping her hands and giving Margaret a look that was almost sisterly. “You want coffee? Or a seat before you pass out in that dress?”
“Both, please,” Margaret sighed. “You’re a vision, Florence. I don’t know how you keep this place from collapsing into ash.” Her attention then swung to you, eyeing you with a raised brow. “Hiding, are we?”
“Obviously.”
Margaret gave you a gentle smile as she gracefully sat down across from you. “Well, you look lovely, dear. Terrified, but lovely.”
You gave her a wry smile. “I thought if I hid in here long enough, maybe the party would be over before I came out.”
“A clever plan,” she said, nodding. “Sadly, it’s no good. The vultures will circle either way.”
As you looked at her, you took note of the strain behind her green eyes as if she had suddenly aged thirty years over the last few days.
“How’s it been? Since he’s back.”
Margaret exhaled sharply. “Stifling. Determined to pretend his heart attack was merely indigestion. He leaves a film on everything like cigar smoke. Nothing like having a man who believes yelling is foreplay back in the house.”
You choked on your spit a little and coughed, not quite sure what to say. The last time the two of you had spoken about Ben’s father, she’d said she didn’t miss him at all.
It reminded you only too vividly of last night’s dream – a fight between Soldier Boy and Crimson Countess and apparently the last straw that made her give him up to the Russians.
And believe it or not, it had been about the fucking chimpanzee sanctuary. More specifically, how she wanted to hold this weirdly heartfelt musical for fucking apes.
And well, Soldier Boy thought it was the stupidest goddamn shit he’d ever heard. Yeah, of course he did because it was. But he didn’t have to be so mean about it:
“Christ, you’re gonna croon lullabies to a bunch of shit-flinging fleabags? Maybe you can teach ‘em to clap when you miss a note. Might be the only audience that don't fuckin’ boo you off stage.”
And God, how he would mock her singing!
“Listening to you sing’s like gettin’ kicked in the nuts by a donkey. Repeatedly. And the fuckin’ donkey still sounds better.”
“If screechin’ brakes and a goat had a baby, it’d still sound fuckin’ better than you.”
“When you hit those high notes, it’s like someone set a dumpster full of possums on fire.”
But the final nail in the icebox was this:
“Go build your little monkey circus, cooch. Maybe I’ll stop by and put ‘em out of their fuckin’ misery.”
Yup, no love lost there either.
Margaret then continued, your thoughts drifting back to her as her tone softened. “He invited the Du Ponts today. I’m sure you already know.”
“I do,” you said and almost chewed off your lower lip. “Any chance they might’ve succumbed to a house fire overnight?”
Margaret swallowed a laugh. “Unfortunately for all of us, no. The storm didn’t wash out those rats. And God knows no party of Richard’s is complete without some psychological warfare against his son. I’ve been preparing for this damn party like I’m heading into battle, not a celebration.”
You smirked a little, lifting a brow. “And what armor are you wearing under that dress? Chainmail?”
She laughed fully this time. “Only metaphorical. Though I did sharpen my wit and rehearse my contemptuous eyebrow.”
“That’s why I like you.”
“But you don’t have to worry about out a thing, dear,” she added and placed a comforting hand on your arm. “Your Benjamin wouldn’t touch her with a ten-foot pole.”
You arched an eyebrow. “Even if the pole had money wrapped around it?”
“He’d only use it to joust his father,” she retorted and sipped on her coffee with elegance.
The kitchen door then swung open with a creak and a flood of sun, and in walked the reason you hadn’t poisoned Richard Brooks’ scotch decanter yet.
Ben.
He was in a pristine white linen shirt rolled to the elbows, collar open, and navy slacks, the kind of casually perfect that makes your mouth dry. His hair was tousled like he’d run his hands through it too many times already. He looked freshly laundered and stupidly handsome.
And very pleased with himself.
He scanned the kitchen like he was looking for you and instantly lit up when he spotted you by the counter. “George, I found her!” he called out through the door, but his sparkling apple green eyes stayed on you, grinning. “Wasn’t sure if you’d barricaded yourself in the icebox or climbed out the dumbwaiter.”
“I considered the dumbwaiter,” you muttered.
He strode straight toward you like you were magnetic, ignoring the polite chaos around him. He slipped an arm around your waist and kissed your cheek. Then your jaw. Then behind your ear.
Behind you, Dottie made a sound like she was gagging. Florence just kept frosting. Frances, always quiet, huffed softly under her breath – her version of a laugh.
And then, Ben got impatient and kissed you fully, fervently, and shamelessly in front of all four women. You squeaked against his lips, giggling.
“Benjamin Brooks!” Margaret gasped but stifled another laugh with a shake of her head.
“Mother.” Ben tipped an imaginary hat and smirked broadly. “Happy Independence Day.”
“Go get dressed, you scandalous boy,” she told him, shaking her head some more, but the smile on her face was undeniable.
“Already am,” he replied and then whispered in your ear, “Though I’d let you undress me again if you ask nicely.”
You lightly swatted his chest, cheeks flushing. “What are you even doing in here?”
“Why? Am I interrupting the coven meeting?” Ben grinned, his fingers trailing up and down your spine. “Figured I’d find you here when you weren’t in the shed. You do like to snack. Are you hiding?”
“Of course I’m hiding,” you replied.
“I should get back to work,” Margaret said, rising gracefully. “Try not to ravish each other where I can see it.”
“You’re no fun,” Ben called after her, still smirking like a little boy with his hand in the cookie jar.
“I’m married to your father. Of course I’m no fun.”
Margaret then excused herself with another shake of her head and something about wrangling seating charts, dragging the staff with her so fast it was clearly a coordinated escape.
Ben then studied you for a moment, hands settling on your waist, thumb stroking the small of your back. You leaned into him, resting your head against his chest, letting yourself breathe.
“You sure you’re okay?” he asked softly.
“No,” you said, eyes closed, inhaling his cologne like it carried memories you hadn’t even lived yet. “But I will be.”
“I’m not leaving your side today,” Ben said, kissing the top of your head. “Unless you push me into the pond.”
“No promises.”
He winked. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”
The lawn behind the Brooks mansion glittered in patriotic spectacle – ribbons in red, white, and blue tied into neat bows on the ends of each table, floral arrangements exploding in bursts of carnations and white lilies, and American flags tucked into the centerpiece of every polished buffet cart and cocktail bar.
It was as if the entire backyard had been scrubbed and star-spangled for the sole purpose of impressing the crème de la crème of wartime Philadelphia.
The party was already in full swing: Servers weaved between groups of people with trays of champagne flutes and crystal bowls of chilled shrimp, there were monogrammed napkins on each table, and the band already played something jazzy beneath a striped canopy. The air smelled like rose water, cigars, and seven different kinds of expensive cologne under the burning July sun.
The guest list was curated – a mix of elite families with names older than the Constitution, sleazy politicians, and military brass.
And you? You were glued to Ben’s side, playing anthropologist among the gentry, clinging to his commentary like it was your first language.
His palm was splayed low on your back, his thumb tracing lazy circles against the silk of your dress, while he pointed out various names and whispered in your ear like a scandalous tour guide.
Because another thing he apparently shared with his mother – the love for high society gossip.
“See the guy with the side part and the fake war injury?” Ben leaned down toward your ear, his hand still snug and low on your back. “That’s Franklin Hughes. He’s been telling everyone he got shot in the shoulder in North Africa, but it was actually skeet shooting in the fucking Berkshires.”
You tilted your head, spotting a puffed-up gentleman shaking hands with Richard near the bar.
“And see that man in the seersucker with the cane? That’s Douglas Fitzroy. His daughter Audrey tried to climb into my lap at Easter when I was seventeen. I think she mistook it for a pony.”
You snorted into your champagne flute before noticing the curious stares of a few guests, mainly from a group of younger women by the buffet. You instinctively tightened your grip on Ben’s arm, even though your outfit gave the illusion that you belonged here as well – fake it till you make it.
You’d been on the Brooks lawn for all of thirty minutes and already counted at least six girls who looked like they wanted to push you into the nearest hedge.
“Over there, that’s the Carmichaels,” Ben continued joyously. “They own the distillery. He’s boring, and she’s more interested in the company of other women from what I’ve heard.”
“Ben!”
He chuckled at your little gasp and pecked your temple. Then his green eyes drifted across the lawn again. “Oh, uh, the girl by the fountain in the green dress? Don’t make eye contact with her. That’s Lucille Sinclair. I took her to prom once. She cried when I didn’t want to go steady.”
You frowned slightly, cocking an eyebrow. “Was this before or after you slept with her?”
He paused, scratching his throat. “During.”
“You’re awful.” You shook your head but couldn’t help the bubble of laughter. “How did you survive this long without getting clocked with a high heel?”
“I have quick reflexes.” He shrugged casually, then grinned that boyish smile again.
“Alright, so what’s the body count here, Brooks?” you asked, glancing around the lawn and still feeling those judgmental stares on you.
Ben played innocent. “How do you mean?”
“How many girls here have seen you naked?”
Ben nearly choked on his drink, then leaned down to murmur in your ear, “Statistically speaking, it’s best if you avoid speaking to anyone between the ages of eighteen and twenty-five. Just to be safe.”
You snorted involuntarily. “That many?”
“Listen, I went through a very misguided Hemingway phase. Lots of brandy,” he retorted and then grinned again, completely unapologetic. “There was a time when I was very popular, alright? Rich, handsome, emotionally unavailable… I was basically catnip for that whole row of pearls over there.”
You followed his nod toward a row of young women near the garden steps, watching you with the kind of passive aggression that could only be bred in East Coast boarding schools.
“Besides,” he added, brushing his knuckles down your bare arm, “you’re the only one who ever told me no. And meant it.”
Jesus fucking Christ, this man…
You raised a brow, looking up at him. “Was that your idea of foreplay?”
Ben gave a sheepish twitch of his shoulders. “Look, my twenties were a bit of a blur.”
“You’re only twenty-three!”
“Which just means I’m still in my prime.” Ben smirked and wiggled his brows.
“Yeah, I have a feeling you’re gonna be in your prime for a while…”
“Thank you,” he said and looked so smugly gorgeous about it that you practically forgave him on sight.
“Not a compliment, Benjamin.”
You tried not to laugh, but it surfaced anyway, especially when he pulled you closer, forearm braced possessively against the small of your back like he wanted every silk-and-sequin heiress here to see exactly who you belonged to – or who he belonged to now.
And then, Ben grabbed you and pressed you up against a stone column wrapped in ivy, one hand firm on your hip, the other tangled in your hair as he kissed you senseless like he hadn’t just done the same thing five minutes ago. Or ten. Or twenty. You’d stopped counting.
“Feel what you do to me?” he whispered, grinding just enough for you to know. He kissed you again, rougher this time, fingers playing with the hem of your skirt. Then he smirked lazily. “Already picturing that dress on the floor, baby.”
“You are shameless. Stop it!” You made a noise between a gasp and giggle, slapping his chest again. “Every girl here already looks like she wants to light me on fire.”
“Correction,” Ben said, amused, “They want to light me on fire. You’re just collateral damage.”
Ah yes.
“Comforting,” you said out loud this time.
“You’re the only one here who matters, sweetheart,” he reassured you, cupping your cheeks, forehead touching yours. And then, his eyes flickered sideways for a split of a second. “Uh-oh. The Du Ponts have arrived.”
Cue the Imperial March…
You didn’t have to look. You felt it. The air changed, the sound warped, and everyone straightened just a little as the Du Ponts glided in like a parade of pearls and Protestant guilt. Grace, a fucking vision in silk white, was flanked by her parents.
And Ben? Well, he only kissed you again – one of those longer, deeper ones that curled your toes, lifted your head to the clouds, and made it clear he had no intention of being on his best behavior during this party.
“Well, isn’t that charming,” Grace’s shrill voice screeched behind you.
Ben didn’t turn around, finished his kiss with all the patience in the world. Then he sighed audibly against your neck, mouthed fuck’s sake, and slowly leaned back, finally twisting around – but only halfway. He didn’t let go of you. His hand remained steadily at your waist.
Then their eyes met, and you could feel Hell freeze over.
“Benjamin,” she said primly. “I see you’ve kept up your little… hobby.”
“Watch it,” he growled, shifting a little in front of you, not exactly shielding you but close. His fingers laced with yours automatically.
“I’m not a hobby, Grace,” you replied coolly, your thumb brushing over Ben’s knuckles to keep him calm.
Grace then looked at you – not like someone she’d only encountered once, but like someone she’d spent months privately raging about. Because she had. Ben’s so-called “phase” was supposed to have ended by now. And instead, here you were. Still next to him. Still touching him. Still making him look happy in a way Grace had never seen before.
“We’ve met, haven’t we?” she asked you like she didn’t fucking know, eyes flicking down to where Ben’s fingers were splayed possessively over your hip. “The tea room. I’m surprised you remembered my name.”
“Oh, I did,” you said with the sweetest smile. “It’s the same as the virtue you lack.”
Ben choked on a laugh, and Grace’s spine stiffened like someone had yanked it from above.
“I must’ve seen you two around town a dozen times this spring. Soda fountain, book store, even some little movie theater,” she said with venom in sheep’s clothing. “How… quaint.”
You arched a brow. “Are you making a fucking scrapbook?”
“I assumed it was just a bit of fun.” She ignored your quip, her smile curling like it hurt. “Aren’t you tired of pretending? After all, Benjamin isn’t known for his consistency.”
You took a casual sip of champagne. “Oh, I don’t know. He’s been pretty consistent with me… especially in bed.”
Grace blinked, smile dropped, looking like she choked on a pearl. Ben, on the other hand, coughed out a laugh that sounded downright gleeful.
Her eyes snapped to him with a coldness that exceeded Antarctica’s. “Your father invited me today. He still thinks you’ll come to your senses.”
“Really?” You smiled tightly. “I wouldn’t bet on it. See, his father can marry you two all he wants, your husband’s still gonna spend his wedding night with me.”
Grace’s face flushed a deep red. “I suppose some people cling to delusion when reality doesn’t suit them.”
You simply smiled again. “Exactly what I was thinking. Thank you.”
Grace didn’t respond straight away. Instead, she looked Ben over one last time, gaze dragging across the flush in his cheeks and the unmistakable impression of his hand on your waist.
Then she smiled – tight, sour, brittle. “Well. Enjoy the fireworks… while they last,” she bit and turned, stomping away with the stiff elegance of someone holding in a tantrum.
Ben let out a low whistle when she’d made it halfway across the garden again. “Christ.”
You glanced up at him – sheepish, innocent. “I was polite.”
Ben met your eyes, visibly impressed, a smile playing on his lips. “Remind me to never get on your bad side.”
You snorted a chuckle and took a sip from your drink. “Oh, honey, I’m pretty sure you’ll manage it eventually.”
Ben only smiled. That devastating, lazy smile that said he was exactly where he wanted to be. And then he kissed you – slow and possessive, like punctuation at the end of a sentence.
If the Brooks Fourth of July party had a theme, it wasn’t freedom, liberty, or the American dream. It was Richard. Richard Brooks – recovering heart attack survivor, self-declared titan of industry, and, as of today, Philadelphia’s most insufferable comeback story.
The lawn was full now – brimming with silk dresses and summer-weight suits, the clink of crystal glasses, and the low hum of political posturing disguised as pleasantries. The sun slanted through the trees in golden beams, but you were tucked under Ben’s arm in the shade as he charmed the hell out of some War Department colonel. Every so often, he dipped his head to murmur something wicked into your ear, and you laughed, leaned into him more. It was easy until–
A silver spoon clinked against a champagne flute.
The subtle hush that fell over the crowd wasn’t total, but enough that you heard Ben sigh under his breath.
“Jesus,” he muttered. “Here come’s the resurrection speech.”
Richard Brooks stood at the head of the steps leading down to the garden, champagne flute raised, suit crisp and face composed in that particular brand of patriarchal smugness only men like him had patented.
“Friends, family, colleagues, esteemed guests,” Richard began, “what a joy to see you all gathered once again for our most cherished tradition.”
A smattering of polite applause followed.
“After my… brief medical interruption this spring, I’m pleased to report that steel doesn’t bend easy. I’ve recovered fully – stronger than ever – and I’m filled with clarity about what matters most. I have been reminded of how vital legacy is. How important it is to see the next generation step up, to carry our name with honor, with purpose. To host, to lead, to build.”
Next to you, Ben groaned under his breath.
“Mortality forces a man to ask: Who will carry the torch? Who will shoulder the mantle of responsibility, of excellence, of vision?” Richard continued, eyes flicking all too deliberately to his son. “I admit passing that mantle is no small task. One must consider not just bloodlines, but merit. Discipline. Readiness. This country rewards resolve. Focus. Clarity of purpose.”
You could practically hear Ben grinding his molars on top of your head.
“And while some among us are still… growing into the shape of that legacy,” Richard said, eyes narrowing now on you in Ben’s arms, “I remain optimistic. And next year, perhaps, we’ll be here not just to celebrate our country’s founding but a new union as well.”
The speech ended with polite applause. Richard basked in it, then descended the stairs with the force of a man who believed the world owed him something.
“I hate him,” Ben muttered.
“He’s practically announcing your engagement with an ellipsis,” you said, brow furrowing. It was almost a word-for-word reenactment of what Dottie had told you once. “Do we think there’s a wedding arch hidden behind the hedges?”
“Not funny,” Ben murmured.
You raised your champagne flute with a wry grin. “To your betrothal, honey. May it be fictional and short-lived.”
Ben eventually let out a snort of amusement and kissed your temple, pulling you closer. But the peace, love, and laughter didn’t last long. He barely had time to recover when Richard marched toward you two like a general surveying his troops, a man with a lapel pin in tow, and of course, Grace floated beside them like a victory prize on a parade float.
“That’s Senator Davis,” you whispered to Ben. “He’s a Republican, but he comes from a working class family and is a supporter of labor laws.”
Ben’s head whipped to you, brow knitting. “How do you know that?”
You shrugged. “I read.”
And then, the group stood before you, Richard and Grace flashing their fakest polite smiles, while Senator Davis looked annoyed at best and exhausted at worst.
Richard then placed a hand on Ben’s shoulder like a branding iron. “Senator, allow me to introduce my son, Benjamin. And this,” he gestured to Grace, “is Grace Du Pont. His fiancée.”
Ben sputtered. “Actually, I’m–”
“Soon to be,” Richard steamrolled. “It’s only a matter of formality. You know how young people are. Always delaying what’s inevitable. But these two? Perfectly matched. Old family. Solid values.”
“Huh.” The senator looked unimpressed by the theatrics, and you knew why.
Know your fucking audience, Dick.
Then Richard turned his chin slightly toward you, almost as if noticing a passing servant. “This is one of the staff assisting the event. Would you be a dear and bring the senator a refill?”
You opened your mouth before noticing Ben was seconds away from losing it.
“She’s not–” Ben started but stopped when you gently placed a palm on his arm.
“It’s okay. Let Daddy have his narrative,” you whispered to him with a wink and then turned to the senator and Richard with the brightest smile. “Of course! I’ll be right back with your drink, sir.”
Grace looked smug and triumphant as hell as she watched you beeline to the bar – but not for fucking long.
Pause.
You stretched your neck, cracked your knuckles. Time suspended and turned the party scene into a Norman Rockwell painting as you swayed easily like a breeze through a garden full of statues.
Waiters paused mid-step. A glass in mid-pour. A hand in mid-toast.
With a diabolical smirk, you let your fingertips graze the fabric of Grace’s white dress before tugging her hem just slightly under the tip of the cupcake stand’s leg.
Oh, this will be fun, Puck said. This party needed a breath of chaos.
You moved on to the delicately balanced champagne tower and nudged the base with a touch. Just enough to make it precarious.
And then, well, your eyes spied Betty Vanderbilt, reaching for a glass near Grace.
Not resisting the mischievous urge, you took a creative liberty and rearranged her path ever-so slightly. You then grabbed a drink for the senator, took a deep breath, and forced the most innocent smile. Angels didn’t wear halos as brightly as you.
And Play.
The scene resumed, and in a few gloriously chaotic seconds, your plan unfolded.
Betty tripped forward and crashed into Grace like a missile. Champagne flutes shattered like glass rain, the toppling tower cascading over Grace’s head in a vintage baptism of golden bubbles. She twisted, staggered, and slammed backward into the cupcake table, ass-first into a heap of patriotic-themed frosting.
“You absolute cow!” Grace shrieked, scrambling to her feet with blue frosting in her eyelashes and a dripping white dress doused in champagne.
“You ran into me, you viper!” Betty huffed, dusting off her dress.
“You’ve been jealous since Benjamin picked me!”
Betty’s eyes flashed. “Picked you? Sweetheart, Ben sampled the tasting menu! I wasn’t the only one. There was a goddamn waitlist!”
Grace lunged. Betty grabbed a champagne bottle like a club. Frosting flew. A small child screamed. Someone’s shoe caught on fire (unclear how). One of the band members dove under a table. You hadn’t even meant for it to get this out of hand, but now that it had?
Delicious.
Next to the senator and Ben, Richard stood frozen in absolute horror, watching the chaos unfold like a man watching his stocks crash in real time.
That was when you decided to return with the sweetest smile.
“Senator, here’s your drink–,” you started and then stopped, feigning a gasp as you clasped your chest with the outrage of a fine lady. “Oh my! What’s going on here?”
Speechless, Ben blinked like he regretted a few decisions again. “Uh…”
Senator Davis took one slow, disapproving glance at Grace, dripping with champagne and rage, before turning to Richard. “Charming girl,” he said dryly. “But not quite the picture of grace, is she?”
Richard’s face turned to stone.
And then, Ben finally stepped forward, pulling you gently and proudly to his side. “Senator, I’m sorry about the chaos. Please allow me to introduce my actual girlfriend.”
Richard’s mouth opened. Then closed. Then clenched shut.
Senator Davis took your hand. You straightened your shoulders and gave him a warm, practiced smile.
“Pleasure, sir,” you said cheerfully. “I read The Iron Puddler when I was sixteen. Made me feel like grit still counted for something, even if you didn’t come from money.”
Davis blinked in surprise but then gave you the warmest smile upon the mention of his cherished autobiography. “Well now, that’s a fine thing to hear. I wrote that book hoping some kid out there’d believe they didn’t need a silver spoon to make it,” he said, sending Richard a look. “That’s worth more to me than a good poll number. I wrote it for folks like you. People can either be defined by their circumstances or use those very circumstances to shape their future. It’s the essence of the American spirit, don’t you think?”
“Absolutely agree, Senator. It hit me like a thunderbolt, sir,” you continued your flattery. “Reminded me that being poor doesn’t mean you’re powerless.”
The senator chuckled happily. “That's all I was hoping for – one person to believe in the long shot. You’ve got fire. I like that. Just don’t go running against me,” he joked with a wink.
“Oh, don’t worry, sir. I’m not planning on running against you,” you said, giggling, and then placed your hand on Ben’s chest, cheekily nodding toward him, “But he might. He’s not one to rely on anyone else’s legacy either. He’s determined to carve out his own path.”
Ben smiled wryly, shooting a glance at his father. “She makes sure I don’t take a single thing for granted, sir.”
“Then you’ve got a good woman and better sense than most in your tax bracket, son,” Davis replied, laughing.
Ben laced his hand with yours and brought it to his lips, kissing your knuckles. “She’s the reason I’ve come this far. I don’t know what I’d do without her.”
“Some think wealth is something you pass down like an heirloom. But there’s something to be said for building something yourself. If ever you two need support, don’t hesitate to reach out. I’ve always believed that anyone with the drive to build something of their own deserves a hand up, not a handout.” Senator Davis then turned to Ben’s father with a smile that was a little too polished. “You’ve raised a fine son with a strong head on his shoulders, Mr. Brooks. It’s rare to see someone so committed to building from the ground up, especially when he’s got the option to take an easier route. It’s commendable. And with someone like her beside him, well, I’d say he’s well-positioned for success.”
Richard looked like he’d bitten through his cigar and someone had drained the bourbon from his blue bloodstream.
And you? You looked up at Ben, grinning smug as hell. “I think I just officially became your father’s nemesis. Should we get out of here before he bursts a vessel?”
“Before you get caught in the crossfire, yes.” Ben chuckled and tugged you away before his father could combust.
The afternoon had been a blur of sunshine, laughter, and clinking glasses. As the day wore on, the party shifted to something quieter and drunker, strings of lanterns beginning to glow against the falling dusk.
You never left Ben’s side, charming every congressman and colonel alike with a trained laugh. You’d made yourself indispensable.
You only slipped away for a moment, excusing yourself inside to the powder room. You smoothed out your skirt, washed away the sticky remnants of stolen cupcakes, and applied a new coat of lipstick since most of it had landed on Ben at this point.
On your way back to the garden, the empty mansion echoed faintly with distant music and laughter from outside. And then there he was:
Richard Brooks was already waiting, posted by the doorway to his study like a vulture smelling fresh meat.
“Miss,” he said, not even bothering to finish your name. “Inside. Now.”
“I was just heading back to the party,” you said, forcing a polite smile.
“Don’t make me repeat myself,” he said and opened the door with one hand and stepped back, waiting like a man who never heard the word no.
You walked past him, breath shallow, pulse fluttering like a caged bird. And then it was just you, Richard Brooks, and the scent of whiskey and old power clinging to the room like rot.
“You’ve been busy,” he said, absentmindedly pouring himself a glass of bourbon. “Making friends. Charming donors. Wiggling your way in like a parasite.”
Your fingers curled slightly at your sides. Careful. Controlled. “What exactly is it you want from me, Mr. Brooks?”
“I want to make this very simple,” he said, stepping closer with the slow gravity of a man used to the world bowing to him. “You want money? I’ll give you money. You walk away from my son. Tonight. I don’t care where you go, but you disappear. And in return, I’ll write you a check large enough to make sure you never have to get your hands dirty again.”
The heat crawled up your chest. You scoffed a disbelieving laugh. “I’m not for sale.”
“You are. You just don’t know your price yet,” he said and took a long sip from his drink, staring at you like you were something stuck to the bottom of his shoe. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done to him?”
“Excuse me?”
“What’s the game plan? Stick around long enough to get a ring? Or were you hoping for a baby first? Anchor him down, ruin his life properly.”
Your throat went dry. “You’re disgusting.”
“I’m realistic,” he snapped. “You think I don’t know your type? You think he’s the first boy with a bleeding heart and a hard-on?”
“Go to hell,” you bit through gritted teeth.
“Oh, don’t play coy now. It’s unflattering. You’ve wrapped yourself around my son like ivy around stone, hoping no one notices what you’re choking.” Richard tilted his head with a smirk, taking a slow sip of his drink. “Don’t think I haven’t seen girls like you before. Pretty. Starved. Sharp enough to keep your legs crossed until the stakes are high enough to spread them. How long did you hold out before you gave my son what he wanted?”
“I love Ben,” you said fiercely.
But Richard only scoffed a humorless laugh, amused. Condescending. His trademark. “Please, let’s not pretend for a second this is love. You needed someone to pick you up off the street, and he was stupid enough to do it. He’s always had a weakness for broken things. He likes the way you moan. That’s it. You’re not the first little stray to wander into our lives, after all.”
Your blood ran cold, skin crawling. “Fuck you.”
“You’re a pretty little thing for a gutter rat. I’ll give you that. Voice like honey, mouth like sin, decent pair of legs…” He stalked forward, sneering.
You took a step back. “Stay away from me.”
“Why?” He smiled, all teeth like a shark. “You’re fine letting my son put his hands all over you. Why not me? I could make it worth your while. Why waste your charms on a boy who’s still wet behind the ears when you could have the man who built everything he’s trying to give you?”
“Don’t,” you warned sharply, hands balling into fists.
He only laughed darkly and took another step toward you, eyes raking you up and down like a lion circling. “Oh, come on. You’re not shy when it’s him.”
And then, his fucking hand came down – bold, calloused fingers grazing your hip like they had every right.
Goddammit!
Like father, like son, like fucking grandson.
But it was his grave mistake to underestimate you.
Your hand shot out, fingers wrapping around his wrist like iron, body moving faster than your brain. You didn’t squeeze at first. Just let him feel the pressure. Enough to make him flinch.
“I suggest you take your hand off me,” you said, sharp as a razor. “Now.”
Then you squeezed. Not enough to break bone, but enough to make his knees buckle. Enough to make him gasp, to panic, to understand that something was very wrong. He tried to pull back, but you didn’t let him.
On the inside, you were terrified. Because for a blink of an eye, you didn’t know how this would end.
“What the hell–” His eyes widened, choking out a strangled sound. “You–… what are you–… You’re–… you’re a goddamn–”
Jesus fuck, please don’t say it.
“–witch!”
Shit. Not again. Why did this keep happening to you?
But this time, you used it to your advantage, leaning in closer with a fearsome snarl. “That’s right, you little Puritan shit. Be fucking scared because if you ever touch me again, Florence will be picking pieces of you out of this leather chair till 1953.”
His blue eyes narrowed as the pain set in. “You crazy little–… Let go of me!”
“Dad?”
Ben’s voice shattered the moment. He froze in the doorway, scanning the room in sharp confusion – his father’s disheveled state, your tense shoulders – and that’s when he saw it. The panic on your face. Your body trembling like a leaf in a storm. Your eyes wet, wild, and locked on the floor like if you looked up, it would all come crashing down. His gaze flicked from you to his father’s twisted face down to the wrist you were still gripping tightly.
That was when you finally snapped out of it and dropped it like it burned you.
Richard yanked his arm away, cradling his wrist like it had been caught in a bear trap. His face was red. His eyes burned.
“What the hell’s going on in here?” Ben asked, brow furrowed.
“I–… Ben, I didn’t–… He–” The words tangled. You’d never stammered in front of Ben before. But this moment wasn’t built for composure. Your heart was pounding against your ribs, ready to crack them on impact.
Richard stumbled back, face contorted with both rage and humiliation, painting on a mask. “She assaulted me. The girl’s hysterical. Look at her! She’s not right in the head.”
Your stomach turned. Your heart dropped. “That’s not what happened, you fucking–”
“She came onto me,” Richard continued, fully drilling his gaze into Ben now like a basilisk. “Started touching me. Got handsy when I told her it wasn’t happening. You really think she’s with you for you, son?”
But Ben didn’t look at him. Not once. His glassy emerald eyes stayed on you. It seemed like he wasn’t even listening to his father. He came closer to you, touched your cheek with a gentleness that almost broke you.
Because he believed you. Because he knew you. Every inch of you.
“Did he touch you?”
You swallowed hard, biting back the stinging tears in your eyes, but you gave him the weakest nod. Silent.
And that was all it took. Something in him snapped.
“You bastard fucking touched her?!”
“Ben, don’t,” you tried to intervene carefully, keep the situation from escalating. You wanted to pull Ben back. Wanted to beg him not to do this. Not to ruin everything for you.
“Watch your goddamn tone, son!” Richard warned, seething with anger. “She’s clearly lying!”
Ben was on his father in a heartbeat, shoving him roughly against the closest bookshelf, hard enough to rattle a few leather-bound works off the shelves.
“Are you out of your goddamn mind?!”
“Spare me the dramatics,” Richard said, snorting. “The girl’s been in your bed for weeks. What’s the difference?”
“She’s not yours,” Ben growled.
Richard laughed loudly. “Don’t tell me you actually think this is love, son. You barely know her. You think she’ll stick around once the lights go out? She’s using you. You’ll see it eventually. They always leave. She’ll leave too. She’ll take everything, drag your name through the mud, and walk away. You can dress it up any way you want, boy, but at the end of the day, she’s just your whore.”
Ben’s fist slammed into the sideboard with a thunderous crack. The lamp wobbled. You flinched and tentatively placed your hand on his arm. You could feel how fast his heart was beating, could feel your own panic ratcheting higher.
“Ben, don’t,” you whispered, tears rolling down your cheeks. “Please, just… don’t.”
But Ben didn’t let go of his father or look at you. Not yet. His hand gently pushed against your shoulder to shift you aside. Out of harm’s way.
“Say one more word about her and I’ll make sure it’s your last in this goddamn house,” he threatened, voice more thundering than the summer storm brewing outside the study’s windows.
Richard only scoffed, shaking his head and smoothing out his dress shirt as Ben’s grip finally loosened, hands falling to his sides. “Christ on a cross, don’t romanticize this. What, you’re calling it love because she spread her legs?”
“Fuck you,” Ben spat.
Fuck you.
Something clicked. You stood frozen behind him, heart pounding, lungs too tight to fill, brain buzzing like a bee hive. Somewhere behind your ribs, where your mind met the deeper currents of knowing, a ripple moved through your sense of reality, subtle but cold. That gnawing, familiar feeling was back, a persistent hypothesis creeping with it this time.
What if–… No, it can't be.
Maybe you were never steering anything. Maybe all you’d done was arrive exactly on cue.
“I’m marrying her,” Ben announced, straight to his father’s face and ripping you out of your chalkboard theories.
The silence was only interrupted by thunder roaring outside, and for a moment, you weren’t sure if it wasn’t just the sound of your heart exploding. Like Oppenheimer was throwing a goddamn trial run in your chest.
“No, you’re fucking not,” Richard bit like it was an order his son was supposed to obey.
“I am,” Ben stood steadfast, his deep voice unwavering. “Tonight, if I have to.”
“Benjamin–”
Ben cut in firmly, bristling. “I will not let you lay another finger on her. I will not let you speak to her. I will not even let you goddamn look at her.”
“She is nothing but a broken little–”
“She is mine,” Ben snapped. “I’m done. I’m leaving with her right now. And I’m never coming back. Keep your money and your legacy. Choke on it for all I care.”
“You’re deluded. You’re not thinking clearly. You’ll regret this, son. Trust me,” Richard continued spewing.
But Ben had already turned his back on his father. He took your hand. His grip was tight. Sure.
“Let’s go,” he said to you, voice softer now.
Your legs felt numb. Your body still shook, muscles twitching.
“Ben, are you sure? What if–”
He stilled for a heartbeat, then turned to you fully, and all you could see was the devotion glistening in his eyes. “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
You couldn’t stop the tears this time. Not from fear. Not from anger. Not from worry. But because it felt like you were fucking drowning.
Ben walked out of the study without another word, your hand safely in his.
But the adrenaline clung to your skin. You didn’t know where you were going. You didn’t know what came next. All you knew was that the man at your side had just set his life on fire.
For you.
Your heart hammered more furiously than the thunder cracking outside as Ben dragged you down the familiar maze of dark hallways, the tapestry blurring in your vision, Richard’s voice still ringing in your ears, but your hand still in Ben’s. His grip was so tight it would’ve probably hurt anyone else, but you still didn’t let go.
Lightning slashed white across the windows as Ben yanked open the double doors to the drawing room. You stumbled through after him, still trembling, still trying to catch your breath, still tasting bile.
And then you heard her voice.
“Benjamin?”
Ben stopped cold. You nearly collided into his back.
Margaret Brooks stood by the piano in her seafoam party dress, and she wasn’t alone – Dottie, quiet as a shadow, hovered just behind her, holding a tray of empty glasses and an anxious expression. Margaret’s eyes locked on her son, then on you – disheveled, breathless, teary-eyed, your hand still clutching Ben’s like a buoy out at sea.
And she knew.
She didn’t say how. Didn’t ask. She just stepped forward slowly. “What did he do?”
Ben’s jaw clenched, but he didn’t speak. His shoulders shook with the effort not to go back and punch a hole in the study wall. He squeezed your hand, fury still radiating off him in waves. You could feel the heat of it in your skin, in your chest, in the way your heartbeat hadn’t slowed since you’d dropped his father’s wrist.
Margaret nodded once. “I see.” Then she turned to Dottie. “Get my travel case and that stack of twenties I keep behind the dressing screen. Hurry.”
Dottie vanished without a word.
“I should’ve burned this whole place to the ground years ago,” Margaret muttered, eyes flicking toward the stormy window before they landed back on you and Ben. “But if I can’t walk out, at least you two can.”
Margaret’s expression softened as she looked at you. She touched your cheek – light, maternal. It made your throat tighten. “You know, dear, after that first dinner, I knew you were the one person in this house who couldn’t be bought or bullied. Which means you’re exactly who he needs,” she said, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “You make him happy. I haven’t seen him smile like that since he was ten years old. Don’t let him forget how to. You take care of my boy. He’s a pain in the neck, but he’s got a good heart.”
You nodded, fighting tears, too choked up to speak.
The thunder rumbled low and mean outside the windows, a distant growl growing steadily closer. You could hear voices echoing down the halls, servants ushering guests indoors as the storm rolled in. The party was no longer spilling across the lawn – people were beginning to trickle into the ballroom, clinking glasses and polite laughter rising in the wake of the approaching downpour.
Then, without a word, Margaret slipped off the massive diamond ring on her left hand and pressed it into Ben’s palm. The thing was a glacier – ornate, heavy, and stunning. He stared down at it like it might explode.
“What–, uh… You-, uhm, you want me to propose with this?”
She snorted humorlessly, shaking her head. “Good God, no, Benjamin! That thing is cursed. Only ever got two decades of eternal misery out of it. For God’s sake, don’t put that on her finger,” she retorted and cupped her son’s cheeks, looking into his eyes intently. “But it’s worth a fortune. Pawn it. Use it to buy her a ring. And maybe something with a roof and plumbing, yes?”
Ben nodded slowly in her palms, brow so intensely furrowed you wouldn’t be surprised if those creases stayed permanently.
“I’ve waited twenty-three years to say this: You are nothing like that man, and I am so proud of you for it, Benjamin,” she whispered and kissed his forehead.
Ben froze and shut his eyes, swallowing hard, and you could see what it did to him – the quiet devastation of a son who’d waited his whole life to hear those words and never believed he would.
“There’s no time to argue. Go to the stables at the edge of the property. No one goes there this time of night. Not in this weather. Use the old servant path past the orchard. You remember it, Ben,” Margaret said.
“I do,” Ben replied, Adam’s apple bobbing.
“I’ll tell your father you stormed off after a tantrum. He’ll believe that. He always underestimated your spine.”
Ben gave a bitter huff.
“I’ll never forgive him for what he did to you,” Margaret added, directed at you both. “But I can still help fix the ending.”
Dottie reappeared then, out of breath, carrying a small overnight suitcase and an armful of coats. Outside, the thunder roared louder, closer, the wind howling like something unholy.
Ben pulled you close, holding the suitcase in one hand and your waist in the other. You both followed Dottie, quick and silent, down the servants’ corridor toward the back door that led out to the garden path.
Dottie cracked the door open, looking left and right. “Coast is clear.”
Rain pounded against the roof now, soaking the porch as soon as you stepped outside. Cold, blinding sheets of it. You gasped as it hit you, but Ben just held the coat over your head and guided you through the downpour, across the gravel, past the hydrangeas whipping in the wind.
And then you ran.
The rain chased you two down the hill like hounds nipping at your heels, slamming the world into a blur, thunder cracking like the earth itself was breaking apart. You sprinted across the lawn, mud splashing under your shoes, lightning streaking white through the clouds and splitting the sky. Your pulse hammered loud in your ears, but the questions and doubts were even louder.
By the time you reached the stables at the far end of the property, your clothes clung to you like a second skin, chilling your muscles to ice. Rain pelted down, cold and hard, stinging your cheeks and numbing your fingers. Thunder roared across the sky like a cannon, drowning out your breathless sobs and the frantic beat of your heart.
Ben pushed the heavy barn door open with his shoulder, glancing back at the dark outline of the mansion once before ushering you inside. You stumbled in after him, dripping, shaking, soaked straight through to your bones. The door slammed shut on creaking hinges behind you, muting the storm to a low, feral growl. The scent of hay, horses, and damp wood filled your lungs.
Panic curled tight in your ribs, sharper than the cold. You didn’t know where to go, what to do. The walls felt too narrow, the future too wide.
“Why didn’t you just tell him to go fuck himself?”
“Ha, I imagine that would’ve probably gone over well…”
You grabbed a beam to steady yourself, rainwater dripping down your back, your throat closing around a sound you couldn’t name. You were breathing too fucking fast.
For a moment, everything was pitch black. Ben fumbled along the wall, fingers brushing until he yanked a brass hanging lantern from a hook on the wall and flicked it on. The low golden light washed over his face, catching the sharp angles of his jaw, the soaked, wild mess of his hair.
He then stopped short in the middle of the barn, hands braced on his hips, chest rising and falling beneath his drenched dress shirt. He looked around quickly – assessing, scanning the space like he could plan ahead, like he could solve everything if he just stared hard enough.
“This’ll do for the night,” he muttered, half to himself. “We’ll figure out where to go in the morning. I can sell the ring, get us on our feet. Just need-… need a plan.”
You wrapped your arms around yourself, dripping, freezing, too full of emotion to speak. The high beams above you groaned with the wind, lightning flashing blue and white through the gaps in the slats.
Ben then finally turned to you, his chest still heaving, hair plastered to his forehead, jaw clenched with fury and adrenaline. His eyes found yours instantly, and something in them softened. He stepped forward, closing the space between you, rainwater dripping from his lashes. His hands cradled your face, thumbs brushing rain off your cheeks like you were made of glass.
“You okay?”
You nodded in his palms but shivered, too.
“Did he–” He bit his lips harshly, another surge of anger rumbling through him. “Did he hurt you?”
“No. No, nothing like that,” you replied, quickly shaking your head. “Just scared me. I stopped him before anything could happen.”
Ben pulled you flush against him then, arms coming around you and holding you tight. He rested his chin on top of your head.
“How did you even do that? I mean, you’re–”
Small. Weak. Fragile. A woman.
Whatever it was, he stopped before he said it.
“I’m not soft.”
“Prove it.”
“I wouldn’t hesitate to go back in time and fucking kill you!”
“Oh, you can certainly try, sweetheart.”
Your heart battered your ribcage. You swallowed heavily. “Oh, uh, adrenaline… I guess. Didn’t really think about it.”
“Right, yeah… Good,” Ben said, but you weren’t quite sure he believed you fully this time. “I should’ve gotten there sooner. Never shoulda left your side at all. I promised you I wouldn’t, but I–”
“Hey, hey, no…” You looked up at him, seeing the thunder-lit fury in his emerald gaze. You cupped his jaw, rough and sharp beneath your gentle palms. “It’s not your fault, okay? You got there. You believed me. It’s all that matters.”
“I shoulda known. Shoulda put him through a fucking wall,” he gritted, muscles shaking under your touch. “I’ll never forgive him for what he tried to do. We’re done with him. With all of it. Just you and me, alright? We’ll make it work.”
Your grip faltered. The words scraped at the raw, unsure part of you. That feeling was back. Stronger. Not even a feeling at all anymore – just truth. A fact you didn’t want to believe in like God.
“Look, while you were away, I talked to Hardwick again. He said he might have something for me. Pays well,” Ben said, and your heart slowed for the first time that day – not for a good reason, though.
“The army general?”
“Yeah, he said we wouldn’t have to worry about a thing. Said we’d be taken care of.”
Your mind flashed with the next lightning strike. Your lips pressed into a tight lines, the creases on your brow even tighter. “What-, uh, what exactly did he say?”
“What does it matter?” Ben looked at you in confusion, probably for the same reason he always had – protecting you.
He had it handled. There was no need for you to worry.
“Just tell me,” you still insisted.
Ben exhaled a small sigh through his nose but relented like he always did, too. “He said they found some scientists in Germany or something. Said it might take a couple more months, though. Maybe years. But they’d take care of us now. Recruit me… or whatever. Said something about paperclips…”
“Ben–” You squeezed your eyes shut and took a deep breath.
“What?”
Don’t get frustrated with him, you reminded yourself. He doesn’t know.
“Did he maybe say Operation Paperclip?”
Ben nodded slowly, forest green eyes flickering. “Yeah, I guess. How d’you know?”
“I-… Your father’s golf buddies talked about it today.”
Yeah, you had listened to that conversation very intently. From what you’d gathered, they’d found out about Frederick Vought’s existence, discovered his plans for Nazi super soldiers, and heard about first trials in camps. Only casualties, no successes. But you knew there’d be one, eventually. Then two. No contact made yet. But that would happen as well.
You were sure about history, weren’t you?
“Hey, look at me,” Ben’s deep voice pulled you back. His thumbs brushed your throat, hands locked around your neck, forehead pressed against yours. “We’ll be okay, I promise you.”
But you couldn’t believe him. Not anymore.
“Ben, wait–”
His lips crashed against yours, tasting of rain and relief. His kiss was desperate. Hard. Addicting. You stumbled back from the force of it, your spine hitting the barn door, wood wet and splintering beneath your soaked clothes.
And you kissed him back just as fervently.
His hands buried in your hair, your ribs, your thighs – anywhere he could touch, like he had to grip every inch of you because he didn’t trust the world not to rip you away.
And you clung to him, shaking, breathless, heart breaking.
“You’re it for me,” he rasped between rougher kisses. “You understand? There’s no one–… There’s nothing else.”
And you never stopped him.
Your legs wrapped around him, massive hands clawing at your ass like you clawed into his broad shoulders. His knuckles brushed up your thighs, dragging your soaked dress higher and higher and higher. Your mind went higher with it.
You whimpered as his fingers shoved your panties aside, his touch rough, reverent, rampant. Yours was desperate, desecrating, despondent as you fumbled at his slacks, unbuckling just enough.
The thunder outside barely hammered louder than your own heart.
“Oh, c’mon! One song. How about something from the fucking 80s? Like Cyndi Lauper! I’m sure you’d like that, huh?”
He pushed into you in one fierce, unrelenting thrust. The oxygen left your lungs in a choked cry, and he filled your lungs with his next kiss. Devoured you like he was trying to crawl into your very skin to stay.
Your fingers dug into his back, twisted the soaked fabric of his shirt in your dying grip. He groaned your name like it undid him, heavy head falling to your shoulder as he held you there, his body shuddering with the force of it.
“I’ve never lo–” He couldn’t finish. Couldn’t breathe.
And you couldn’t either.
The thunder growled above you like a warning, the storm outside only amplifying the chaos inside you. He moved again, and you whimpered, overwhelmed by the pressure, the stretch, the maddening, soul-breaking closeness.
“You’re it. You’re everything,” he groaned, thrusting harder, rhythm gone to ruin.
And you were shaking.
From the cold, from the heat, from the whiplash of fear and want and love and devastation. You didn’t know which part was louder – the terror of what came next, or the ache to fall apart in his arms and stay there forever.
Ben kissed your cheek, your jaw, the corner of your eye where a tear escaped.
His thrusts grew messier, less controlled. One hand gripped the door beside your head, the other wrapped tight around your waist, grounding you. But it didn’t matter. Nothing did.
And still, you tried to carve something real out of the ruin.
Your body moved with his, dizzy with need, lost in him. Every thrust was a promise. Every breathless, broken word was a vow.
“How about something a little slower… Time After Time! That’s fucking perfect for you!”
“Ben–”
“I’ve got you. I’ve always got you, sweetheart. That’s it,” he growled, his rhythm stuttering as your body clenched around him.
You could barely keep up with the half-incoherent words spilling from him. Desperate, beautiful nonsense. Confessions torn from the back of his throat.
And all you could do was feel him – thick and hard, and so deep, it hurt, it ached, it mattered.
Ben never saw the spiral in your eyes. Didn’t feel the tremble in your hands as panic and desire collided like fire and gasoline. He drove into you with every ounce of desperation he felt – relentless and bruising, as if only he went deep enough, hard enough, he could stay inside you forever.
And your hips rocked against his, chasing the edge together and outrunning everything else.
“Led Zeppelin, huh?”
“Yeah, I got it for my twenty-fifth birthday. I went to Zeppelin’s first tour in 1969. Only wear it on special occasions.”
“Oh, yeah, right… Happy fucking birthday, I guess.”
You loved him. You bit down on his shoulder as you came, cried out his name and everything else. It tore through you – sharp, electric, wild. Your head fell back against the door, body tight and shuddering in his hold, letting the rain on the tin roof drown out the war in your heart, you wished you could Pause right here.
But you didn’t stop time. You didn’t stop him. You didn’t stop yourself.
You kissed his temple. His jaw. His mouth. You held him tighter than you ever had.
And you were losing him.
Your name fell from his lips, wrecked and worshipful at once. He buried himself as deep as he could go – one broken thrust, one strangled moan, one bruising grip on your ice-cold skin, spilling into you, thick and hot.
The world was still for a moment till your mind screamed through the haze.
“That’s a closed loop. Does that make sense?”
“Yeah, I think it fucking does…”
“Marry me,” Ben murmured through the patter of rain, barely coherent, barely audible. It was a whisper, rough and low. Not a grand declaration. Not some dramatic plea. Just two words spoken into the hush of the barn, forehead resting against yours, his breath still ragged.
And your eyes snapped open.
You felt it more than heard it, like your whole world had just shifted a few inches sideways. His eyes searched yours, his thumb brushing your cheekbone, and there was something in his gaze that leveled you more than anything else had tonight.
“I mean it. Marry me,” he repeated, louder this time. Firmer. Surer. He swallowed thickly. “I love you. I know I should’ve said it before. It’s not because I didn’t feel it. I did. I do. I just-… I never knew how. You make me feel things I don’t know what to do with. You always have.”
And tears welled in your eyes, but not for the reason he thought. He didn’t know how much loving you would ruin.
But he kept going, hope laced in every word. “This isn’t a mistake. I’ve been sleepwalking through my whole goddamn life and then you–… you showed up like a fucking miracle, sweetheart. And suddenly I know what I want. I want you.”
Your mouth opened, but nothing came out. You didn’t breathe. Couldn’t. You just stared up at him, trying to find footing on ground that didn’t exist.
And your legs loosened around him before you even realized you were doing it, letting him slip out of you, soaked dress clinging to your skin.
A half-step. A breath of space.
His eyes flashed with hurt and confusion. “What’s wrong? Why aren’t you saying anything? Why are you pulling back?”
“I-… I just need a minute,” you managed to push out, head dizzy, barn spinning. “Why would you do this…” you muttered to yourself, not meaning for Ben to hear, but he did.
You weren’t talking about him, though. Soldier Boy.
“Do what? Don’t you want to? I thought-… I thought you loved me, too.” His brow furrowed, trying to understand something he never could.
“No, I-… I mean, I do. I love you, okay? God, I love you so much,” you assured him, your feet pacing frantically on hay and damp earth.
“Then what is it?” He was trying so hard to keep calm, but panic flashed behind his green eyes. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
He knew. He fucking knew.
“I just-… I need space. Please. I need… I need time, okay? To think,” you tried to explain, but your head was too convoluted to function, memories flooding your mind and drowning all coherent thoughts but one:
Why would he sent you here?
Ben’s jaw clenched. “Why do I feel like you’re running?”
“I’m not!” you cried, voice cracking, tears falling. “I’m not trying to run away from you.”
“Then what is it?” He stepped forward. “Is it something I did? Something I said? Just tell me–”
“I can’t!” you snapped, chest heaving. “I can’t tell you anything!”
He flinched like you’d slapped him. You were only making it fucking worse.
And you hated yourself for it.
“I need a second,” you whispered. “Just… give me a second. Please.”
And you bolted.
You didn’t wait for his answer. You stumbled toward the barn door and out into the rain, the storm swallowing you whole. You didn’t look back. Couldn’t. You would’ve stopped if you did. The cold slapped you in the face. Mud squelched beneath your feet.
You ran behind the barn, to the side where the shadows swallowed everything. The wind ripped at your hair. You crouched behind the nearest tree, hands fisted in the wet bark, heart galloping, lungs seizing.
“Okay,” you whispered to yourself. “Okay, it’s fine. Just breathe. You can think. You can–”
But the storm was louder than your thoughts. Ben’s voice echoed faintly in the distance – your name, over and over again. Desperate.
And then that horrible, all-consuming pull unfurled from your spine, from the deepest part of you where time lived like a ticking bomb. Electricity surged up your arms. The world folded in.
Shit. Not now. Not ever.
But you were already gone.
▶️ Chapter 11: When You’re Slapped, You’ll Take It and Like It
Should we do a mental health check-in again? How are you holding up, loves? Was this the end to 1942 you've expected?
Hang in tight for Soldier Boy's POV next week. We're going back to the future 😉
Coming Up:
The scream came first. Feral, guttural, ancient. Something primal ripped from your throat like it had been building in your bones for eight fucking decades.
You snapped like a wire he’d strung too tight, lunged forward, and decked him clean across the jaw.
The punch snapped across his face, sharp and personal and full of all the fire he remembered. It cracked so loud, the room winced. You were a magnificent angel of vengeance.
God, he fucking missed you.
And Ben took the hit. Didn’t even try to block you. Knew he deserved it. Knew he had it fucking coming.
He staggered back half a step with a grunt, head snapping just slightly from the brutal force of it. Slowly, he turned back to face you, look at you, and then the corners of his mouth twitched upward into a smirk.
Smug. Cocky. Satisfied.
“There she is.” He grinned, then rubbed his jaw like it amused him, inspecting the ache with something between pride and admiration. “Actually fuckin’ felt that one. Good for you, sweetheart. Knew you had it in you.”
🚀 Read up to 4 chapters ahead on Patreon now
Tag List Pt. 1:
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#time after time#soldier boy#soldier boy x reader#soldier boy x you#soldier boy x supe!reader#soldier boy x female reader#soldier boy fic#soldier boy imagine#soldier boy/ben#1940s!soldier boy#40s!soldier boy#the boys#the boys amazon#the boys season 3#the boys x reader#soldier boy fluff#soldier boy angst#soldier boy smut#jensen ackles#jensen fucking ackles#jackles#jensen ackles x reader
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Everywhere Inside My Head | Luke Hughes x Fem!Reader
part one. part two. (her perspective)
warnings! mentions of break up and angst!, and I think that's it! word count: 3.5k
summary: the first week post-breakup is said to be the hardest, which isn't wrong when you've been dating the same hockey player since the start of college. you try to find yourself again and how to live a life without him in then picture — but it feels nearly impossible when he's everywhere inside your head.
req: omg please i need a happy ending // Oooof chefs kiss👩🍳🤌✨ I can just see reader living her best life and luke seeing her having fun from a distance before groveling and pleading for her back a/n: hi guys! sorry for the wait but here it part three to look at you now and I remember everything! I hope you guys like it!! I lowkey hit a major writers block during it, it's not my best work... lmk if you want one from his perspective! mwah ily all sm 🩷
You laid on your childhood bed, staring up at the ceiling for hours. You weren’t listening to anything, nor were really thinking of much. You were just existing in that moment. You reflected on everything and how much your life had changed in the past week.
It was difficult for you to pack your life in New Jersey into a few suitcases and move back to your hometown in Michigan. All you thought about was him and how your entire life was surrounded by him. He was like the sun and you were one of the planets that revolved around him.
He was your yesterday, today, and your tomorrow.
But now he’s nothing at all.
You knew deep down that you made the right choice, even though it felt so wrong. You knew you deserved more than the crumbs he gave you. You deserved more than eating alone at dinner with his made plate staring at you. You deserved more than staying up late at night wondering if he was coming home or staying at Jack’s, at Nico’s, or at Jesper’s place.
You had grown used to falling asleep alone before leaving him, even though it wasn’t the most comfortable or pleasant feeling. But it felt wrong to go to bed without curling up with his pillow, or to hold his hoodie that smelt so strongly of him close to your chest, or to go to the store and not pick out the ingredients for his favourite meal.
It felt wrong to only make one cup of coffee instead of two.
People always say the first week is the hardest, and they weren’t kidding. You found yourself crying at the smallest things and very frequently. When a song would play on the radio or if you saw the devils post about him — tears would blur your vision. Your parents tried their best to keep your mind off of it but it was difficult when everything in Michigan reminded you of him. It was difficult to get out of bed or to eat or fall asleep, everything seemed to move so slowly or maybe it moved too fast and you couldn’t quite keep up.
You slowly got out of bed and moved to get ready for the day. You had reached out to Ethan and Mark, your closest friends from college, to see if they wanted to spend the day with you.
Ethan and Mark were originally friends with him but inevitably became close friends with you in the process of your relationship forming. They kept your spirits high while you were doing long distance with your boyfriend and provided a great support system for you.
When you pulled out an old UMich hockey t-shirt from your dresser, you remembered vividly the day that the two of you had a flour fight in the kitchen while attempting to bake cookies.
“I hope you know that Ellen never let me in the kitchen to bake.” He chuckled behind you as you pulled out the ingredients from the cupboards. His arms were wrapped around your waist as his face was tucked into the crook of your neck.
You giggled, “I promise you that you can bake. Plus I’m right here anyways!”
"You're going to distract me by having my last name on the back of your shirt y'know," He mumbled against the skin of your neck, his curls tickling you.
"You act like I don't regularly wear your clothes." You teased him, leaned down to kiss his temple. You could feel the smile that grew on his face from your words.
"Okay, little miss baker, tell me where to start," He said to you before finally pulling away. You guided him through the different measurements and ingredients to add to the bowl. His country playlist hummed quietly in the background as the kitchen was filled with your lively conversations and the common laugh here and there.
It was all tame until it came to mixing the ingredients, "Luke!" You gasped as flour went flying out the edge of the bowl, "You're spilling it!"
"It's not my fault that I'm just that strong, have you seen my biceps?" He joked as you tried to scoop the flour into your hands. Your hands were covered in white when a mischievous smile drew across your lips,
"You mean these big biceps?" You smirked while planting a large handprint on the sleeve of his black crewneck. HIs jaw dropped at the sight of your hands on his clothes,
"You did not!" He cried out dramatically, releasing the wooden spoon that he held, "Oh you just started something that you're going to lose."
Your eyes widened while he grabbed a small fistful of flour directly from the bag and tossed it at the front of your (his) navy t-shirt. The cloud of white caused you to cough a bit before bursting into a fit of laughter. Yeah, so much for a peaceful cute afternoon of baking cookies with your boyfriend.
The memory that played in your head caused a flood of tears to flow from your eyes. It left you crumbled on your bedroom floor with the same shirt clutched to your chest as sobs shook your body. You didn’t even hear the two boys come into your room.
Ethan held you close as he let the tears run their course, while Mark had quietly cleaned up your room — knowing that you were never a fan of a messy space. He sorted your clothes into their designated drawers and tossed garbage into the trash before returning back to you.
“Oh you poor thing,” Ethan mumbled into your hair as you tried to regulate your breathing, “It’s going to be okay.”
“I’m trying so hard to not think of him,” You choked out as you wipe away the tears, “But everything reminds me of him.”
“You don’t need him,” Mark said to you, sitting down at the foot of your bed, “He’s been hurting you and he doesn’t deserve all these tears.”
Ethan nodded along to Mark’s words, “Exactly, plus you’re hot and sexy so like you can pull any other guy in the world.”
You let out a weak laugh through your sniffles, “I can’t even imagine dating someone who’s not Luke.”
“Have you spoke to him since you left?” Ethan asked, his arms resting to his sides. You shook your head,
“I told him not to reach out to me and he hasn’t said a thing since.”
“Good for Hughesy,” Mark mumbled, “I’m surprised that he actually listened.”
“You deserve so much more, you know that right?” Ethan said to you, while wearing a sad smile on his usual happy face.
You wiped a rogue tear from your cheek, “I know. That’s why I left in the first place, I couldn’t keep doing what we were doing.”
“You’re so strong,” Mark told you, rubbing slow circles on your back with his hand, “We’re both really proud of you. We love Lukey, he was our teammate but we also love you too.”
“Thanks guys,” You replied, finally calming down. Mark gave you a hand up from the bed before the two of them guided you out of your house for the first time in a while. You got into Ethan's car, you in the passenger seat while Mark took the back seat. Ethan started driving to who knows where while you just rolled down the window.
You leaned your head towards the window and enjoyed the feeling of the wind blowing through your hair. The sun was warm on your skin, your body most definitely soaking up every bit of the sunlight. Music played from the stereo but you didn't pay much attention to the lyrics, only reflecting on the thoughts that played in your head.
It was a strange feeling from having a constant in your life for the past four-ish years in the shape of your boyfriend to not having him at all. It would be a lie if you said that you didn't miss him because in reality, every fibre of your being did.
You told yourself every hour of each day that you deserved more than what he gave you, but you missed him. The version of him that you fell so deeply in love with all those years ago. His soft eyes that were adorned with love and his cute crooked smile that fill your body with butterflies. All of the sweet words he would say to you when you were having a rough day, and how safe his arms felt.
It is never easy to date a professional athlete, but boy was it ever so easy to love one.
"You okay?" Mark asked quietly as Ethan parked the car, his voice pulled you out of your trance.
"Yeah, I'm okay." You offered the two boys a smile, "Just thinking, that's all."
Ethan's hand brushed over your upper arm, "C'mon, let's get some ice cream. It's the solution to everything."
You followed the two hockey players into the ice cream parlour, each of you choosing a flavour before paying. Ethan paid for yours after claiming that it was the least he could do after what his idiotic best friend did to you. The three of you sat outside on the bench, laughing at whatever story Mark was explaining to you.
The boys were right, ice cream does seem to solve every problem. The cold sugary sweetness of the dessert dancing in your mouth as you grinned at your friends in front of you seemed to bring the happier side of you out.
And just for a moment, it did feel like everything is finally okay. That everything does happen for a reason and the end of the emotionally tolling relationship, you would be okay. Until your phone vibrated.
Luke: Hey, do you have time to talk?
Luke: I know that I'm probably the last person you want to hear from right now, but please this is important.
You felt your heart drop to your stomach, and you assumed the smile on your face dropped too as you read the notification.
"Everything okay?" Ethan asked cautiously, his eyes bouncing between you and your phone that you were intensely staring at.
You swallowed hard, "He just texted me."
Mark's lips tightened into a thin line, "I guess I spoke too soon... Are you going to reply?"
"I don't know," You mumbled, rereading his texts again, "Should I?"
"It's up to you honestly," Ethan responded, glancing over your shoulder to see what the devils player sent to you, "Do you want to hear what he has to say?"
"Sort of... But I think it's because I feel bad for just leaving him without saying anything."
"But you did say something to him!" Mark commented, "You told him how you felt and how you saw things, he should've changed his behaviour right after you spoke to him. Not after you finally left."
"He's not wrong," Ethan hummed, agreeing with Mark, "He's probably going to say something like... I'm so sorry, I miss you so much baby, I love you, and I promise I'm going to change or at least some sort of bullshit like that."
You frowned, knowing that they had good points. You decided that you would make your decision later and opted to head back to your home with Ethan and Mark. You were enjoying your time with your friends and you refused to let him ruin that for you.
Besides, did you actually want to hear from him? Is he going to ask you to get back together with him? Is he going to tell you that he's going to change and promise to not treat you like that again?
More importantly, what are you going to say? Would you take him back? Would you fall for his empty promise about changing yet again?
All these thoughts danced in your head as you laid in bed that night. You had yet to respond to his two text messages. You knew in your gut that you physically could not handle the feeling of being a second or third choice to him. Not again. You knew that you deserved to be loved and cherished so loudly and proudly, which he failed to do on multiple occasions.
But him talking to you was important to him, and it was going to mean something to him. So you replied,
You: does a phone call work with you?
His response was immediate.
Luke: Yeah, if that's what you want. Is now okay?
You looked at the top right corner of your phone screen, seeing that it was 8:13PM. You chewed on the inside of your cheek, debating if you were ready to hear his voice again. But if you didn't do it now, it would probably keep you awake all night.
You: ya, now is fine
In seconds, your screen lit up with his contact photo that made your stomach twist. You had yet to change it and it was one of your favourite photos of you two together. You pressed the pick-up button to his call, taking a sharp inhale as you did so.
"Hey," You heard his voice and suddenly the walls that you had built up seemed to crumble a bit. His voice was shaky and you could tell from his tone that he hadn't been sleeping. He sounded exhausted.
Your hands trembled slightly as they held the phone to your ear, "Hi."
"I wasn't sure if you would actually pick up," He breathed out, you could tell that he was trying to suppress the shakiness in his words, "But, I'm really glad that you did."
You only hummed in response, you didn't know what to say. What do you say to your now ex-boyfriend after pulling an Irish goodbye on a random Tuesday afternoon.
"I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry," He continued after pausing for a moment, "I wish I could tell you this in person because you deserve an apology face to face, rather than over the phone."
"I don't think I would fly to New Jersey for an apology." You replied with a slightly harsher tone than his and harsher than you anticipated.
You heard him stammer at your words, then hesitation as he seemed to be calculating the right words to say next, "Then I guess right now would be a bad time to tell you that I'm at your front door."
You sat up from your previously lying position, your hand clutching onto your phone even tighter, "You're what?"
You scrambled from your bed, in your oversized t-shirt and small athletic shorts, running down the stairs of your parent's home to the front door. You peeked from the glass to see his tall figure standing on the front porch.
You hung up the phone call and opened the door slightly. The air in your throat hitched as you took in the sight of him. He wore his sweatpants with the black Artizia hoodie that he had 'borrowed' from you. His curls were hidden under a Yankees cap that you knew he loved so much.
His eyes that were typically so bright, were dull. He had signs of the lack of sleep he's gotten, evident in his dark under eye bags and his paler skin. He looked just as exhausted as he sounded over the phone.
"Wha- What are you doing here?" You stuttered out, still in shock that he was standing in front of you rather than in your apartment back in Jersey.
His hand rubbed the back of his neck, a nervous tick that he had, "You didn't respond to me when I first texted you and I got worried that something might have happened to you... So I called your mom and she told me that I can come over to try to fix it."
You were at a loss of words.
"You called my mom? No wait, you flew from New Jersey this afternoon to check on me?" You repeated his words, in somewhat of a state of shock from the information you were still processing.
"I know you told me to not come and find you or talk to you," He swallowed hard before stuffing his hands into the pocket of your sweater that he wore, "But you deserve an actual apology for what I put you through. You didn't deserve any of that."
You slowly nodded, still catching up on the situation. You opened the door further, welcoming him into the home that he had visited on multiple occasions. You guided him to your childhood bedroom, with you sitting on your mattress while he opted for the chair by your desk.
"I'm sorry for just showing up," He said to you, pulling off his hat and resting it on the desk, "It's just- It didn't sit right with me that I made you feel unwanted and unloved and that I didn't care about you and that you never got to hear me say sorry."
Your focus was on your hands and twisting the rings that you wore, and only briefly glancing up to look at him as he spoke to you.
"I am so sorry," He started, his voice regaining the slight shakiness that it had over the phone, "I never meant to hurt you like that and I know that's so stupid of me to say after doing all of that to you. You didn't deserve to feel that way ever and it makes me feel sick that I did that to you after everything- after everything you have done for me."
Your heart clenched and twisted at the way his voice got heavy as he tried to bury down his tears. You could hear it. Your chest felt tighter as he rambled on and your vision blurred as your eyes glossed over.
"You've done nothing but love and support me through everything and you're the best thing to ever happen to me," You finally pulled your eyes away from your rings and locked eyes with his blue ones. The same blue ones that you fell in love with, now brimmed with tears.
"Hockey has always been a big part of me and it's a part of who I am but you, you are my future and you are what I live for." He told you, a singular tear escaping from the corner of his eyes as he slowly approached you.
You stayed sitting on your bed as he lowered to his knees and carefully took your hands into his, "I don't deserve your forgiveness. Not after everything I put you through. But I love you. I love you so fucking much. You are the reason that I am where I am and I am who I am."
"I love you and I've done a shit fucking job of showing it lately and you deserve so much more than what I have given you," He said while pressing a kiss on your knuckles,
“You’re the love of my life, my every feeling is controlled by the look of your face,” Luke confessed with his hands running through his curls as he started spilling the emotions he wanted to desperately show you, “Fuck knows I can’t sleep without you.”
“I exist for you,” He breathed out, looking directly into your eyes, “If I could take it all back and make sure that you never doubted your position in my life, I would do it in a heartbeat.”
“Luke…” You mumbled out, your voice soft as you sat frozen in place.
His large hands cupped your cheeks as he looked up to meet your downward tilted face, his thumb gently brushing away the loose strands that had fallen over your eyes.
“I know,” He whispered, “It kills me every day knowing that you are far away from my life and it kills me to know that I could have prevented it."
You slowly nodded with your glossy eyes and a small smile starting to etch onto your face, “Oh, Luke.”
“God, I fucking love you and I can’t ever see myself with anyone else because you’re it for me. I will spend the rest of my life proving it to you if that's what it means to keep you, I love you."
“I love you too, Luke” You smiled as tears finally started to fall from your eyes. He smiled back at you,
“Don’t say too because then you’re just agreeing with me." Luke teased while wiping away your tears.
You giggled, “I love you Luke Hughes.”
You grabbed his biceps and pulled him to his feet as you stood up from the bed. Your arms immediately wrapped around his neck while his instinctively looped around your middle, "Let's never do that again." You said to him and he let out a breathy chuckle,
"I don't think I can handle being away from you." He whispered before kissing your lips softly, "I'm so sorry."
"I know you are," You mumbled against his lips.
#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes imagine#luke hughes fanfiction#luke hughes fluff#luke hughes fic#luke hughes angst#hughes brothers x reader#nhl x reader#nhl fanfiction#nhl imagine#nj devils x reader
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Sero Hanta x Reader Fic Recs!! (Tumblr/Ao3/Wattpad)
My Hero Academia Fic Rec Masterlist
all in a day's quirk/tumblr link ✨✨by @andypantsx3/ andypantsx3 (oneshot, friends to lovers, fluff, smut<18+>)Sero gets hit with a quirk that makes others see him as the person they are most attracted to. Which you really wish you had known before you opened your mouth and gave him your usual, “Hey, Sero!”. [COMPLETED]
Trash Polka-- A Sero Hanta X FemReader/ Tattoo Parlor AU ✨✨ (neighbours, fluff, humor)Today is move day, and unbeknownst to you, you actually rented an apartment right above a tattoo parlor with an exceptionally cute owner, who is now your new landlord. .. But you don't particularly mind… and, the owner seems sweet, so who are you to complain ?[COMPLETED]
Infiltration Complete! ✨✨by animepseud (multipurposeroom)(fake dating, fluff, humor)The adventures of Sero (codename Hunter), you (his pretend wife), and your attempts at investigating a murder while trying not to fall madly in love with each other by the end of it (mission impossible).[COMPLETED]
he was like the Sun ✨by @rainybubbles (oneshot, fluff) Maybe it was your childish obsession with stars that led you to him. After all, if you took a closer look, he was like the Sun.[COMPLETED]
skintight✨ by @saturnsorbits (oneshot, suggestive, fluff) Sero's got an embarrassing problem.[COMPLETED]
it’s a date ✨by @shinaus (oneshot, fake datings, friends to lovers)The invitation was to a party this coming weekend, which they have insisted within it that you had to bring your boyfriend too.[COMPLETED]
do re mi by @mythiccheroacademia (oneshot, angst, toxic relationship, cheating) Sero loved you. He loved you with everything he had. But he thinks he hates you just the same.[COMPLETED]
Fall In Love With Me. by Itsjustadrian(neighbours, friends to lovers, fluff) You have had the misfortune of being neighbors with the pro-hero cellophane. It wouldn’t be bad if you didn’t embarrass yourself the first encounter you had with him.[COMPLETED]
Daddy’s Little Hero ✨by Madysenpai(oneshot, parent! sero and reader, domestic fluff, family feels) Pro hero Cellophane tends to stay busy with his hero work, but on his day off he forces you to get out of the house while he spends the day with your daughter.[COMPLETED]
your initials paint my skin ✨by whatisreggieshortfor (oneshot, soulmate au, angst with happy ending)You just want to be a hero. You don’t want a soulmate, don’t want the bond. But… you’re kind of stuck to him. Pun intended.[COMPLETED]
always have, always will by Kumi(oneshot, childhood friends, angst) Sero Hanta doesn’t know a life without you by his side. For as long as he can remember, you’ve always been there. You’ve always been his person—always have, always will. Or so he thought.[COMPLETED]
Love (Sero Hanta x Reader) by dirtyoatmeall(oneshot, fluff, insecure! reader, comfort)In which you are insecure and believe Sero couldn't love you back. In which you are so utterly wrong.[COMPLETED]
Why Kaminari Is Not Allowed To Do Grocery Shopping✨ by jumix (oneshot, fluff, humor) It started, as many things in Sero’s life apparently do, with Kaminari wanting Oreos. aka 5 times Sero goes to the grocery store + 1 time he left with more than just the groceries.[COMPLETED]
Like Father Like Daughter ✨by Jessimatsu_girl(oneshot, fluff, just parenthood guys) Your sweet little girl is worried that she'll gets a quirk like her Papa.[COMPLETED]
Spider-Man✨ by animepseud (multipurposeroom)(oneshot, fluff)Sero is a pro hero and an adult who struggles with being a pro hero and an adult. You are (kind of) a Cellophane fan. Though things get cute nothing really gets resolved but sometimes it doesn't really matter.[COMPLETED]
It Started With A Postcard by NyxDeLaNuit (oneshot, strangers to lovers, fluff, smut) Sero loves his friends, but he's desperate to talk to someone who doesn't know who he is…[COMPLETED]
Me & You Together by kingexpl0sionmurder(oneshot, fluff, secret admirer) “What? Who sent me flowers?”[COMPLETED]
It’s worth it. by Madysenpai (friends with benefits, friends to lovers, fluff, angst, smut)Sero and you are friends with benefits, you wanted more but knew you couldn’t have it. Sero knows your relationship with him only goes so far, so why is he so jealous of Todoroki?
The Things That Bind Us by lunadoesntexist(fluff, friends to lovers, mutual pinning) You were alone… and then he showed up.[COMPLETED]
Blankets & Banter by Stumbleduck(oneshot, fluff) It’s the Bakusquad’s not so weekly sleepover of shenanigans, video games and hopefully no fires. But after getting very little sleep the night before you start to doze off on a certain tape user’s shoulder…[COMPLETED]
BREADTH: Sero Hanta by KaigaraX (oneshot, fluff)Someone You Loved - Featuring: The Hero & Exactly As You Saw.[COMPLETED]
A Sign of Love✨ by @dira333/ Fogfire (oneshot, soulmate au) Everyone has the first words their soulmate says to them tattooed on their body. Well, everyone but Sero.[COMPLETED]
#fic recs#fanfic#fics#fanfic recommendation#fic rec#recommendations#fanfic rec#fanfiction#recs#fanfics#mha fanfiction#mha#mha x reader#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#boku no hero acedamia#bnha#mha sero#sero hanta#sero x reader#sero x yn#sero fluff#sero smau#hanta sero x reader#mha hanta sero#sero hanta x reader#sero hanta x you#sero hanta smut#hanta sero#my hero acedamia
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Ooo hii can I please request a Bucky x fem!reader where Y/n had been taken by a bad man (not related to Hydra or anything, just a bad person or her ex bf or something) and she was able to escape and ran to Bucky for help, the only issue being that Bucky was the Winter Soldier at the time and he was ordered to off anyone who sees him, so he does what he was ordered to do, he fires his weapon into her and leaves her there to die🥺 Except Y/n was rushed to the hospital (after someone found her) and she recovered. When Bucky moves into the same apartment complex as Yori (to at some point make amends with him), he literally runs into Y/n (who is his next door neighbor) when he’s moving in (knocking her over accidentally because hey, he’s a tall man lol). He’d help her up and be apologizing and when he gets a good look at her face he’d be in shock because he swore he had offed her when he was the winter soldier, he even had nightmares about that night frequently, a scared, hurt woman coming up to him begging for help and protection but he turns his weapon on her and leaves her there🥺 His nightmares like the ones with Yori’s son. She’s probably frozen in fear, tearing up, and be shaking at first and it’s break Bucky’s heart🥺 It’d take her a while to feel comfortable around Bucky, but Bucky would really try🥺 Maybe they’d say hi and be friendly when they see each other, and then one day she comes over to ask for sugar and flour (cheesy I know) and at first he’s not really looking at her (he’s nervous because they haven’t had a full conversation like this before and he doesn’t want her to be afraid of him anymore) and he’d ask where her flour and sugar went (they walked in at the same time and she had groceries) and she nervously laughs and points to her clothes (she had a little mishap when trying to bake and the mixer got the flour and sugar all over her face and clothes). Lol imagine he just bursts out laughing and then she does too, and he asks if she wants help baking and she invites him over do so🥰 This becomes a weekly thing, them baking together (I don’t know why but I can see him being good at it lol) and they start getting close and growing feelings. When they first bake together, they both talk about what happened that scary night, and she shows him the scar from when he turned his weapon on her. Then one night the man (maybe her ex) who had taken Y/n comes back after her and she calls Bucky and asks if he can come pick her up because she’s scared (it’s late at night and she’s walking home alone after work) and he saves her🥺 After that they both confess their love for each other, also Bucky definitely not only kisses her on the lips, but also softly lifts her shirt and softly kisses her scar from when he was the Winter Soldier🥺 He’d kiss her scar whenever they’re cuddling (and when they’re doing more✨) and for a while he’d tear up when he sees it but Y/n would just kiss the scars on his left shoulder in response🥺
Forgiving Person » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier
Pairings: Winter Soldier x Female Reader, TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Summary: You forgive Bucky for what he did to you years ago.
Warnings: tiny bit of Angst, Fluff, language, shitty ex, attempted murder, blood, hospitals, crying, kissing, pet names
A/N: @kpopgirlbtssvt thank you for the lovely request🩵
Written on my phone. My apologies for any mistakes.
Header made by @buckyys-babydoll / divider made by me
GIFS ARE NOT MINE! Gif credits go to the creators.

You were running as fast as your legs would let you. You looked behind you to see if you outran your ex boyfriend. As you were looking behind you, you ran into someone and fell to the ground, making an “oof” sound when you hit the ground. You looked up, feeling relief wash over you when you seen someone who can help you.
“Oh thank god!” You scrambled to stand up. “Sir, you have to help me! My ex boyfriend is after me and won’t leave me alone!” You exclaimed.
The Winter Soldier stared down at you due to the height difference between the two of you. You were too out of breath from running and scared to even notice the dead body on the ground. You were breathing heavily and didn’t hear the cocking sound of his gun.
“No witnesses.” The Winter Soldier says.
“Wha-” He shot you in the chest before you could get a word out.
You cried out in pain and looked down at the blood pouring out of the gunshot wound on your lower abdomen. You felt yourself become lightheaded due to the blood loss and fell to the ground. The Winter Soldier stared down at you for a second before walking away and reporting back to the HYDRA base.
You don’t know how long you were laying on the ground bleeding out. You felt your eyes getting heavy. You weren’t sure if you were going to pass out from the blood loss or die on the ground underneath the dim streetlight. A lady who was walking her dog seen you laying on the ground and walked over to you. She saw a pool of blood under you and your shirt soaked with blood. Lucky for you, the woman is a nurse.
“Ma’am, I’m a nurse. Can you hear me?” The nurse asks.
“I don’t want to die.” You mumbled.
“You’re not going to die. I’m going to get you help. Try to stay awake, ok?” She says.
You nodded weakly. You passed out from the blood loss as she was calling for the paramedics. As soon as you got taken to the hospital, you were taken straight to surgery. You woke up a few hours later in a hospital bed. You heard beeping of a monitor. You had an IV in your arm and an oxygen tube in your nose.
“Hello there, sleepyhead. We were wondering when you were going to wake up.” A familiar voice said.
You looked to the left of you, seeing the nurse who found you almost lifeless on the street.
“Where- Where am I?” You asked, your voice raspy from waking up.
“You’re in the hospital.” The nurse tells you.
“Why?” You asked.
“I found you on the street bleeding out and I called for help. You went straight to surgery. There wasn’t any major damage. You’ll be here for a few days just to be sure.” She explains.
“Oh.” You replied.
You readjusted yourself on the bed, wincing when you felt pain on your lower abdomen where you were shot.
“Are you feeling pain?” She asks.
“Yes.” You whimpered.
“I’ll get you something for the pain. Meanwhile, try to relax.” She says softly.
“Ok.” You replied.
———
Years go by since that day. You haven’t thought about that day in a while. The only time you think about that day is when you have nightmares about it. You’re fully healed. Although, you do have a scar on your lower abdomen.
Bucky, on the other hand, has nightmares about that day almost all the time. He’d made amends with everyone he has wronged in his past, except for one person… you. He wishes that he could make amends with you. Little does he know that you’re his next door neighbor.
You were going through your mail as you got off the elevator and walked to your apartment. You weren’t paying attention to where you were walking and you bumped into someone. Actually, Bucky accidentally bumped into you when he turned around to pick up another box to moved into his new apartment, which caused you to fall to the floor and you dropped your mail as well. You picked up your mail before standing up. Bucky held out a hand for you to help you up, which you accepted.
“I am so sorry. I didn’t know there was someone behind me.” Bucky apologizes.
You froze when you heard his voice. You know you heard his voice once before. It was the night when he shot you and left you for dead on the sidewalk. You looked up at him due to the height difference between you two. Your eyes went wide when you seen him. Bucky’s eyes went wide too.
“It’s you again.” You said.
“Oh god…” Bucky said.
You went straight to your apartment, quickly unlocking it and went inside. You closed and locked the door behind you. You leaned against the door, your eyes tearing up and started shaking.
“This isn’t real. This has to be a bad dream or something.” You say to yourself.
Meanwhile, Bucky was trying to process the fact that someone he- the Winter Soldier killed years ago is his next door neighbor. He wants to knock on your door and make amends with you, but he already knows you hate him and you want nothing to do with him. For now, he’s going to leave you alone and wait for the right time to make amends with you. Also, this is something he has to tell his therapist tomorrow.
You and Bucky got little to no sleep that night. Bucky had nightmares about the night the Winter Soldier shot you and thought you were dead. You found yourself waking up in the middle night and staring at the wall in the dark, trying to process the fact that the man who attempted to kill you years ago is your new next door neighbor. You two left your apartments around the same time. You were locking up your apartment to go run some errands while Bucky opened the door to his apartment. He stood there, staring at you. Not in a creepy way. In a way like he was going to apologize for what he did to you, but no words were coming out of his mouth. You froze in place again when you seen him. You two awkwardly stared at each other for a few seconds before you walked away. Bucky followed a couple feet behind you. You held the elevator door open, because it’s the nice thing to do.
“You can have the elevator. I’ll take the stairs.” Bucky says.
You nodded and stepped further into the elevator. While you were running errands, Bucky was at his therapy session. Dr. Raynor was talking to him, but he wasn’t really listening. He was staring off into space. Dr. Raynor noticed that Bucky wasn’t paying attention and she snapped her fingers to bring him back to reality.
“James, did you hear a word I said?”
“Yes?” Bucky answers like a question.
“What’s on your mind?” She asks.
Bucky shifted in his seat and fidgeted with his fingers.
“Years ago, there was this girl who was begging me to help her.” Bucky begins and then clears his throat.
“Why was she asking you for help?” Dr. Raynor asks.
“Something about her ex boyfriend.” He said. “Anyways, instead of helping her, I- he shot her and I thought she was dead this whole time, but she’s not. She’s very much alive and healthy. She’s also lives in the apartment next door to the one I just moved into.” He tells her.
“Did you guys recognize each other?” She asks.
“Yes.” He answers.
“Make amends with her.” She says.
“That’s kinda hard to do when she’s scared of me.” He says.
“Just try.” She says.
Bucky nods and sighs.
A few days go by since Bucky was told to make amends with you. He hasn’t yet. He’s been working up the courage to do it. You don’t freeze in place when you see him so that’s progress. Even though, you haven’t said a word to him since the day you found out he’s your new neighbor.
Bucky was walking to his apartment at the same time you were coming home from the store. Bucky noticed you had some groceries so he got out of your way so he didn’t accidentally bump into you again. You gave him a smile as you walked past him. Bucky smiles back. That’s progress too.
“Hi.” You say.
“Hi.” Bucky says back.
That’s even more progress. You and him are making more progress than the both of you thought.
Later that same day, Bucky heard a knock on the door. He opened it to see you, which surprised him.
“Hi. I’m sorry to bother you. I’m baking and I was wondering if you have flour and sugar.” You say.
“I- uhh- I have both.” Bucky says nervously.
You followed Bucky to his kitchen and got you a cup of both ingredients.
“If you don’t mind me asking, what happened to the flour and sugar you just bought?” Bucky curiously asks.
“Oh- umm-” You laughed and pointed at your clothes.
Bucky looks at your clothes, seeing flour on them. He laughed when he seen it.
“I accidentally put the mixer on a high speed and this happened.” You say.
“It happens to the best of us.” Bucky says.
You giggled and nodded.
“Thank you for the flour and sugar.” You say, picking up the two cups that contains flour and sugar.
“You’re welcome.” He smiles.
Bucky, being the gentleman he is, opened the door for you.
“What are you baking?” He curiously asks.
“Chocolate chip cookies.” You tell him.
“My favorite.” He smiles. “Can I help you bake them?” He asks.
“Of course.” You replied with a smile.
Bucky closed the door to his apartment and followed you inside of your apartment. He helped you pick up where you left off before you made a mess of flour and sugar on your clothes.
“You’re a good baker.” You say as you watched Bucky mix up the batter with ease without using the mixer.
“Thank you.” Bucky says. “When I was a kid, me and my sister always baked with our mom on the weekends.” He tells you, smiling at the memory.
“That’s sweet.” You smiled.
Bucky helped you put cookie dough on a couple of trays and then put it in the oven.
“Would you like to sit down in the living room while the cookies are baking?” You asked.
“That would be nice.” Bucky says softly.
You got something to drink for you and Bucky and then went to the living room to sit down for a little bit. You turned the TV on, even though you and Bucky were talking and not paying attention to it.
“So umm- I’ve been thinking about this for a while and I’ve been working up the courage to make amends with you for what I did to you years ago.” Bucky says nervously.
“Oh umm- ok.” You say nervously.
Bucky cleared his throat before going ahead with his amends.
“I’ve made amends with the people I’ve wronged over the years, except for you. If I’m being honest, I wasn’t sure how I was going to make amends with you, because I thought you were dead this whole time. When I was moving in next door a few days ago, I was in complete shock to see that you’re alive and my next door neighbor.” He pauses to clear his throat and took a deep breath. “What I’m trying to say is that I’m so sorry for shooting you as the Winter Soldier years ago. I wasn’t in my own control. I should’ve done something to help you and not try to kill you. If I could go back in time and change things, I would. I hope you accept my apology. If you don’t or need time to think about it, I completely understand.” He says.
You sat there, staring at Bucky after he poured his heart out into an apology. Bucky nervously shifted in his spot on the couch as he waited for you to say something.
“I appreciate your apology and I accept it.” You say.
“You don’t hate me for what I did to you?” Bucky asks.
“I’ll admit I was scared to have you as my new neighbor, but all of that fear went away the more I seen you. You look like a forgiving and trusting person. If we’re going to be living next to each other, we don’t need any bad memories between us.” You say.
“You’re right.” He agrees.
“Hug on it?” You asked.
“Sure!” He smiles.
You leaned over and hugged Bucky. You also gave him a kiss on his bearded cheek, which made him blush.
“Do you want to see my scar?” You asked.
“Sure.” Bucky says.
You stood up and lifted your shirt just enough to show him the scar on your lower abdomen. Bucky’s facial expression softened when he saw it. His eyes teared up too. His right hand reached up to touch it, but he quickly retracted it.
“It’s ok. I don’t mind.” You say softly.
Bucky brought his hand back up to your scar. His fingers traced your scar softly and gently.
“I’m so sorry.” He apologizes again, his voice cracking.
“It’s ok.” You whispered.
You readjusted your shirt and sat back down on the couch, giving Bucky a hug. You two got startled by the sound of the timer for the cookies going off.
“Cookies are done!” You say.
Bucky followed you to the kitchen and you got the cookies out of the oven. You two tried them, humming in satisfaction.
“These are amazing!” Bucky says.
“I know right!” You agreed. “This was fun. We should bake together more often.” You say.
“I would love that.” He smiles.
———
Over the next couple of weeks, you and Bucky have gotten to know each other. You two bake every weekend. It’s yours and Bucky’s favorite thing to do together.
At sunset, you were walking home from work. You felt a chilling presence a few feet behind you. You glanced behind you just to make sure you weren’t thinking things. Your eyes went wide when you seen your ex boyfriend. You down an alleyway to call Bucky.
“Hey, doll. What’s up?” Bucky answers.
“B-Bucky?” You say in a shaky voice.
“Doll, what’s wrong?” He asks.
“My ex is following me.” You tell him.
“Try to stay calm. I’m on my way.” He says.
“Ok.” You replied.
You put your phone back in your pocket. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath.
“Miss me?” Your ex boyfriend asks.
Your eyes shot open. Your ex boyfriend was standing in front of you. You didn’t dare to say a word.
“What’s wrong? Cat got your tongue?” He asks.
You didn’t say anything. A whimper left your lips when he grasped your upper arm tightly.
“You’re- You’re hurting me!” You whimpered.
“Oh, she speaks.” He says.
You used all of your strength to get him off you, but he tightened his grip on your bicep as you did so. Then he finally let go of your arm when he got thrown to the ground.
“What the hell, man?!” Your ex says as he stood up. “What’s your fucking problem?” He asks.
“Stay away from her.” Bucky says.
“This doesn’t concern you, buddy so just run along.” Your ex says.
Your ex tried to approach you, but Bucky grabbed his arm, twisting it around to his back and shoved him against the wall.
“I told you to stay away from her.” Bucky says.
“What’re you gonna do if I don’t?” Your ex asks.
“If I see you anywhere near her, I won’t hesitate to break every bone in your body.” Bucky says.
“I’d love to see you try.” Your ex laughs.
Bucky twists your ex’s behind his back more.
“Ow! Ok! I’ll stay away from her!” Your ex says.
“Good.” Bucky says.
Bucky let go of him and shoved him, making him stumble as he ran down the street.
“Are you ok, doll?” Bucky asks softly.
“My arm hurts a little bit.” You say.
Bucky lifts your shirt sleeve to see a hand mark beginning to form.
“Let’s go home.” He says softly, wrapping his arms around you.
Bucky took you to your apartment. He got you something to drink as you sat down in the living room.
“Can I tell you something?” Bucky says as he sat down next to you.
“Of course.” You replied.
“I- uhh-” He nervously cleared his throat before saying anything. “I have been enjoying hanging out with you lately.” He begins.
“I enjoy hanging out with you too, Bucky.” You say with a smile.
“What I’m trying to say that I’m in love with you since the day we made chocolate chip cookies together. If you don’t feel the same way about me, then we can go back to being neighbors who bake together.” He confesses.
“I’m in love with you too, Bucky.” You confessed.
Bucky smiles and cups your cheeks, kissing you passionately. You smiled against his lips. Then you two leaned your foreheads against each other’s, gazing in each other’s eyes. Then Bucky got off the couch and got on his knees. He lifted your shirt just enough to show your scar. He gently rubs his thumb over your scar before giving it a soft kiss. You smiled down at him and gently ran your fingers through his soft hair.
“I love you, doll.” Bucky almost whispers, looking up at you.
“I love you too, baby.” You say softly.
-Bucky’s Doll
#sergeant james buchanan barnes#sergeant james barnes#sergeant barnes#james buchanan bucky barnes#james buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#james barnes#bucky barnes#winter soldier#tfatws!bucky#tfatws!bucky barnes#sebastian stan#marvel#mcu#winter soldier x female reader#winter soldier x reader#winter soldier x y/n#winter soldier x you#winter soldier angst#winter soldier fluff#winter soldier one shot#winter soldier imagine#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes angst#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes imagine
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🍸 What’s Your Poison?🍸

Hi,I’m AJay! Nice to meet you,honey🩷
• Bbygirl of ‘01
• Pisces🌷Princess
• Somehow managing to work a big girl job in the real world of the USA
Just vibin’ & thrivin’ on my fun little blog sharing my cute little ideas with cutie patootie strangers.
(That’s you, babe. You’re the cutie patootie💋)
*Stray Kids🥟 (mainly writing for Hyunjin)
*Enhypen🦌
Join me for Happy Hour Gossip!
I’m open to request or a chat if you’d like to giggle,rant,or cry with me!
*Request🔒:fake text(predominately),drabbles,au prompts,etc(I have more time for shorter fics)
*I will not write member x member or poly(just not into that,sorry)incest/step siblings, taboo/hardcore themes, include the members’ real life family, and I will politely decline your request if it’s something I am not comfortable with writing or speaking on :)
*Stray Kids are real people & therefore everything below is completely fictional. This doesn’t reflect who they truly are in any way, shape, or form. I am not trying to misconstrue who they are in real life.
Don’t forget to touch grass,babe <3
✨Everyone’s welcome at Stay’s Bar✨
(especially my fellow Black stays🤎)
**MDNI & SFW Rules**
Minors(16+)are free to interact with my blog as long as you keep it cute & appropriate.
*SFW* Fics are safe for the younger stays and will usually only have profanity listed as the main warning.
*MDNI* Fics are self explanatory and should not be interacted with unless you are 18+
Keep it cute or get blocked <3
Angst⛈️/🌩️; Fluff🧸; Smut/Suggestive🔥
FWB!Hyunjin Text Series 🧸⛈️🔥 (MDNI)
A late night text accidentally sent to one of the artist you’re working with leads to a half a year long agreement and Hyunjin wants more…
(fwb to lovers)(IdolxMusic Producer!Reader)
Fix Your Face, Please! 🧸🌩️ (MDNI)
Hyunjin’s very vocal about how jealous & possessive he can get, and although it can get troublesome you find it kind of hot…
We Were On Break!! 🌩️🧸 (SFW)
Your ex boyfriend, Hyunjin, has a hard time accepting the end of your relationship and is very persistent on getting back together…
Corporate Gang 🧸 (MDNI)
JYP Co. gets a new IT-Agent and you can’t help but gush about him to your favorite coworkers…
(Nerdy,shy!Hyunjin Series)
Take Your Friends Out ⛈️🧸 (pt.1 ) (MDNI)
Your boyfriend has stood you up 3x this month and you decide that you’re done with being second place. Of course he disagrees…
Don’t Say That To Me ⛈️ (pt 2.) (MDNI)
Months after you took Hyunjin back you have to face the tough reality of falling out of love with him and end things for good…
Stress Induced Fever 🧸 (SFW)
Your job has decided to transfer you to their USA branch for a year and Hyunjin is failing miserably at holding himself together before you leave…
Sad Nudes? 🧸 (MDNI)
You’ve had a shit day and Hyunjin tries his best to cheer you up thousands of miles away…
I Love You. Now Date Me! 🧸🌩️ (SFW)
Your bestfriend has been jokingly telling you he’s in love with you for years only for you to find out it’s not a joke…and oh yeah, he HATES your boyfriend…
Babe, I Broke It 🧸 (SFW)
Hyunjin broke your brand new coffee mug and he’s taking it harder than you are (soft bbyboy)…
I Really Like You, Like Romantically 🔥🧸(MDNI)
Your best friend asks you for an insane favor of helping him lose his virginity and discovers his feelings in the process…
I Will Win! Fighting!🔥🧸 (MDNI)
You and Hyunjin make a friendly bet to survive No Nut November and despite his persistent confidence on winning, he eventually gives in…
Emergency Contact ⛈️ (SFW)
You and Hyunjin had a mutual breakup over a year ago, but apparently he forgot to remove you as his emergency contact and feelings are revisted…
Safe,Loved,& Accepted ⛈️ (SFW)
Bang Chan has been making light of the nasty comments you’ve been getting online until you are put in a sticky situation and he’s worried sick a thousand of miles away…
Have You Always Been This Hot?? 🔥🧸 (MDNI)
Attempting to survive No Nut November with your best friend Chan brings forth feelings neither of you knew existed…and really good sex…
I Just Want To Help ⛈️ (SFW)
Your ex Hyunjin takes it upon himself to help you with financial difficulties after months of no contact, but he never expected you to fight him every step of the way…
Wanna See It Up Close? 🔥🧸 (MDNI)
You always jokingly try to convince your best friend to get laid and he jokingly tells you to take his virginity (except it’s not a joke)…
I Hate You. All Of You. 🌩️ (SFW)
A sneaky picture brings your relationship and trust crashing down and he refuses to let it all go over a stupid misunderstanding….
Keeping Secrets 🌩️ (SFW)
Felix’s antics leaves Hyunjin an over dramatic mess and it takes an entire week before he confronts you about the secret you’ve been hiding…
Is This A Trick Question? 🌩️🧸 (SFW)
It’s not a secret that Hyunjin’s perusing you romantically, but despite returning his feelings your past relationship holds you back. Little did you know Hyunjin was just what you needed to try at love again…
Model!Hyunjin Text Series 🧸🔥(SFW/MDNI)
At the height of his career, Hwang Hyunjin goes down the road nearly every 24 year old with fame in the public eye does - sex, money, and rebellion. You accepted a job set up by his parents to get his reputation and career back on track, and you’ve known no peace since thanks to your very clingy (and unashamedly in love) client…
(ModelxAssistant!Reader)(grumpy gf,sunshine bf)
I’m Gonna Ride You. 🔥🧸 (MDNI)
Your friends thought it would be funny to hack into your phone to prank Hyunjin while you’re in the bathroom. Unfortunately, this little prank would lead to one of the most embarrassing (amazing?) nights of his life…
#hyunjin#hyunjin x y/n#skz hyunjin#hyunjin imagines#hwang hyujin imagines#hwang hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin smut#skz fake texts#skz au#skz fluff#skz smut#skz imagines#skz scenarios#skz#skz x reader#skz fanfic#skz aus#skz stay#stray kids angst#stray kids fake texts#stray kids fluff#stray kids fanfic#stray kids x reader#stray kids smut#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#stray kids#skz ot8#stray kids au
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The Dragon’s Treasure has my WHOLE heart 🥹
thank you, babe. i've really enjoyed writing her and aemond
The Dragon's Treasure (3)

pairing | young aemond targaryen x niece!reader
word count | 11k words
summary | “...and for the first time in what felt like ages, you felt a glimmer of happiness for the future.”
tags | as we all know ANGST, ANGST, ANGSTTTT, and eventually rainbow after the storm, SA! (aemonds brothel scene), things do get better y'all, targaryen incest, reader is described to have silver hair and lilac eyes, reader being a sensitive queen, and FLUFF and young love, aemond being a SIMP, TOOTHROTTING FLUFF
a/n | I cried so much, while writing this. I loved writing young aemond, I loved writing young helaena but especially loved writing young reader. I promise you guys this, when I have the time I'll write a one shot of them when they're older and more post-episode 7. When they're older (16&18). Also I really went overboard ngl
likes, comments, reblogs are always appreciated ✨
𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 1 — 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 2 — 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
You weren’t eating again.
Aemond had overheard his mother’s worried whispers as she discussed your condition with the maesters. He was still angry with you—hurt by the thought that you would try to leave them all behind, leave him behind, without a second thought. But no matter how deep his anger ran, his concern for you ran deeper.
After a long and contemplative ride on Vhagar, the weight of the sky above him and the sea below doing little to settle his thoughts, Aemond sought out his mother.
“Aemond,” Alicent began, her voice weary as she looked down at him, her exhaustion evident in the fine lines around her eyes. Between preparing for Aegon and Helaena's wedding and your worsening state, the strain was taking its toll. “I don’t think she’s in the mood for any visitors.”
She still didn’t know the full truth of what had happened—the attempt to run away with Helaena, the plan you had kept hidden from them all. All Alicent knew was that you had retreated into yourself once more, refusing to speak to anyone, even to Helaena, the one who had once pulled you from your darkness.
“It’s her nameday tomorrow,” Aemond murmured, his voice quiet but steady.
Alicent’s face tightened, pain flashing in her eyes as she thought of how you had been before all this—brighter, more spirited. Aemond continued, his tone soft but resolute. “She likes strawberry cakes. Let me bring her one, Mother. Please.”
Alicent’s gaze softened as she looked at her son. Her sharp, determined boy, scarred both in body and soul, yet still showing more kindness than anyone would expect after all he had endured. He had lost an eye, but his heart—his heart still carried a tenderness that surprised her.
She sighed, her shoulders drooping with the weight of her worries. “Very well,” she said softly. “You have my leave to visit her tomorrow.”
Aemond didn’t smile, didn’t show any hint of relief, though inside, the resolve in his chest tightened. He simply nodded in acknowledgment. His mind had already begun to turn over what he would say to you when he saw you—how he might reach you through the walls you had built around yourself.
Tomorrow was your nameday, and whether you liked it or not, Aemond would be there for you.
──────────────────────────────
Aemond’s heart raced as he approached your chambers, his hands gripping the tray carrying strawberry cakes. He had spent much of the morning thinking of what else he could bring—perhaps a necklace, something to match the sapphire that lay hidden beneath his eyepatch. You loved jewelry, and he knew how your eyes lit up at the sight of anything that sparkled. But in the end, he settled on simplicity—just the cakes you loved, hoping they would be enough.
As he neared your door, he was greeted by Ser Rowan, your loyal guard, who stood as firm as ever, his expression stern.
“My prince,” Ser Rowan acknowledged with a nod, his voice gruff. “The princess is in no condition to receive visitors today.”
Aemond stiffened, his chest rising as he squared his shoulders. He would not be turned away so easily. “It is her nameday,” he said firmly, his voice laced with authority. He took a step closer, meeting Ser Rowan’s unyielding gaze with his own, violet eye sharp. “The queen has granted me permission to visit her.”
Ser Rowan remained still, but Aemond didn’t back down. He tilted his head slightly, his tone low and challenging. “Will you disobey the Queen’s word?”
There was a moment of silence as the guard’s eyes flicked down to the tray Aemond carried. His stern expression softened just slightly when he saw the strawberry cakes. Ser Rowan let out a heavy sigh, his duty to you outweighing his hesitation. He too wished for your recovery, and perhaps, he thought, a visit from Aemond might bring some light back into your eyes.
“Very well, my prince,” he said at last, stepping aside. He opened the door with a creak, allowing Aemond to enter.
Aemond took a deep breath, holding the tray steady as he stepped into your chambers. The door closed softly behind him, but the room was dim, heavy with silence. His heart clenched at the sight of you curled up on the bed, facing the wall, your small form barely stirring.
"Niece," Aemond’s voice echoed softly through the room, breaking the heavy silence of your chambers.
There was a pause, and then your voice, quiet and tired, reached him. "Go away."
He pursed his lips, setting the tray down gently on the bedside table. The room was dim, shrouded in a pink hue from your curtains, and he made his way over to the window, pulling the drapes wide open. Sunlight poured in, casting the room in a golden glow.
From behind him, you hissed, "Close them." He heard the rustle of your blankets as you pulled them over your head, shielding yourself from the brightness.
Aemond couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at his lips as he turned back to face you. "Happy Nameday," he said, his tone lighter than before. "I brought you something."
"I don’t want it," you muttered from beneath the covers, your voice muffled and distant.
He sat beside you, his movements careful, placing the tray of strawberry cakes within arm’s reach. "I’m sure you will," he replied softly, hoping to coax you out from your cocoon of blankets.
For a few moments, there was nothing—just the faint sounds of the breeze outside and the distant chatter from the courtyard. Aemond sighed, the weight of the silence between you heavier than he could bear. He reached out, his hand hovering just above your arm, but then hesitated. His fingers twitched before he pulled his hand back, unsure of how to communicate with you.
"You know," he began quietly, his voice careful, "I wouldn’t force that on you. To bear children you don’t want. One would be enough."
There was a sharp scoff from beneath the blankets. "How generous of you," you replied, the bitterness in your tone unmistakable.
Aemond’s jaw tightened, but he kept his gaze steady on the blankets that covered you. His mind drifted to the records he had been reading, the histories you both loved to discuss. He knew how much you valued stories of the past, of old kings and queens, of the lives they led. Swallowing, he decided to share what had been on his mind, hoping it might reach you.
"I’ve been reading more since our last talk," he murmured. "About King Jaehaerys and Queen Alysanne. Even after many children, he made her bear more when she didn’t wish to." His voice was soft but steady, the weight of his words hanging in the air between you. He had been thinking of you, trying to understand your fears.
The sunlight streamed across your bed, casting shadows as Aemond spoke. He knew that love was rare among their kind, especially in Targaryen unions, but he hoped. Hoped that maybe, in time, you would not just be duty and title to him.
"I would never do that to you," he added, his tone sincere, almost vulnerable. "I want our marriage to be different."
The room was still. The only sound was the faint rustling of the breeze outside, and the quiet breathing of Dreamfyre from somewhere far beyond your window. Aemond’s words lingered, waiting for you to respond, to show him something—anything—that might bridge the gap between you.
Slowly, you lowered the blankets just enough for your eyes to peek out, meeting Aemond's gaze. "He was a bad man," you mumbled, referring to King Jaehaerys.
Aemond, ever the scholar, couldn’t resist. "He was a good king," he pointed out, his tone firm but calm.
You rolled your eyes, a small defiance shining through your sadness. "Still a bad man." For a moment, the two of you just stared at each other, and then you added thoughtfully, "Aenys Targaryen was a good man."
Aemond let out a scoff. "He was weak."
You narrowed your eyes at him, but there was a flicker of something behind your lilac gaze, something like amusement. "A weak king, yes. Only because he tried to make everyone happy."
Your eyes shifted towards the tray on the bedside table, where the strawberry cakes sat. After a moment of hesitation, your voice, still tinged with sadness, broke the silence. "Is today really my nameday?"
Aemond nodded, his own expression softening. "Yes."
"Oh." Your response was quiet, almost absent-minded, as if you were still processing.
Aemond reached for the tray and held it out to you, offering a tentative smile. "Would you like one?"
You eyed the cakes, and though your sadness still lingered, something softened in your expression. "Those do look nice," you murmured. Finally, you pulled the blanket away from your face and sat up slowly, your movements careful and deliberate. Though your face remained neutral, devoid of the joy that used to light it up, you gave a small nod. "Alright."
Aemond couldn’t help the small smile that spread across his face as he handed you a cake. It wasn’t much, but seeing you like this—out of bed, talking to him—felt like a small victory.
As you took a bite, your eyes flickered to his once more, and Aemond stayed beside you, content with the simple moment of shared silence, hopeful that things might get better.
Aemond felt as though he were trapped in a cage of unbearable heat, the air around him thick, suffocating. The wine—a dark, bitter liquid that Aegon had forced upon him—now churned wildly in his stomach, its taste sour and unpleasant. He longed to rid himself of it, to escape the strange and unfamiliar sensations overtaking him.
It was after the grand feast in honor of his thirteenth nameday that Aegon, with a sly grin and a glint in his eye, had promised him a "surprise." Aemond, still naive to the darker aspects of his brother’s humor, had followed without protest, his curiosity outweighing his caution. They had ventured deep into King’s Landing, to a shadowed place Aemond had never seen before—a pleasure house filled with laughter and the soft rustling of silks.
Before Aemond could voice his hesitation, Aegon had disappeared into the throng of bodies, swallowed by the merry voices and whispers of the women within. And Aemond was left alone, standing awkwardly, unsure of what was to happen next.
He was led into a small chamber, dimly lit by flickering candles, their soft glow casting strange and unsettling shadows on the walls. The tapestries that adorned the room depicted scenes he barely understood—men and women entwined in ways that seemed more confusing than enticing. He felt a knot tightening in his chest, and a cold wave of dread settled over him.
Then she entered—a woman far older than his mother, her presence overwhelming in the confined space. She smiled at him, her voice soft and syrupy, laced with sweet lies that made his skin crawl. She cooed over him, her hands reaching for him before he had the chance to say anything, her touch gentle yet intrusive as she began to undress him.
Aemond’s heart pounded in his chest, and every fiber of his being screamed for her to stop, to leave him be. But his voice—his strength—had abandoned him. He remained frozen, his limbs stiff and unresponsive as she whispered things into his ear, words he wished he hadn’t heard, promises he didn’t understand.
When it was over, Aemond was left numb. He sat there, silent, as if his body no longer belonged to him, as though he had become something entirely separate from himself. Trembling, he fumbled with his clothes, his fingers shaking as he struggled to dress. His mind was a whirl of confusion, shame, and anger, but above all, he felt the desperate need to flee.
He didn’t care where Aegon had gone, didn’t want to face him or anyone else. The only thought that filled his mind was reaching you, his niece, his betrothed, his future wife, the one person who might make him feel whole again.
His feet carried him through the secret passageways of Maegor’s Holdfast, each step heavy with fear and sorrow. His breaths came in sharp, ragged gasps, his chest aching as he pushed himself to move faster. His tears—hot and unbidden—ran down his cheeks, blurring his vision, but he did not stop.
He passed his own chambers, the rooms of his mother, and everyone else, not wanting to explain the mess of emotions swirling inside him. He only wanted you.
It felt as though the gods had granted Aemond a moment of mercy when he reached your chambers, finding Ser Rowan absent from his post. Without hesitation, he pushed open the door and stepped inside, his heart still racing, tears brimming in his eye as he struggled to hold them back.
You were fast asleep, your back turned toward him. Aemond let out a quiet breath of relief. He hadn’t come to disturb you, only to be near you—just your presence, your warmth, was enough to calm the storm inside him.
Quietly, he made his way to your bed and carefully, as if afraid to wake you, slid in beside you. He kept a respectful distance, not wanting to intrude, but just close enough to feel your presence. The motion stirred you from your sleep, and you sat up, blinking in confusion.
Your eyes widened when they fell on Aemond, and for a brief, horrible moment, he realised it was because of his face. He had forgotten—he had left his eye patch behind at the brothel. The clear ragged sapphire was bare for you to see.
Panic surged through him. You would be disgusted, he thought, repelled by the sight of his disfigurement. He moved to leave, heart pounding, but your voice reached him before he could retreat.
“Aemond, breathe,” you whispered, your strained voice soft and steady.
He froze, his chest tight with the effort to suppress his panic. He needed to leave—he couldn’t bear for you to see him like this. Not you, his dearest niece, who always knew him as strong, as whole. He couldn’t let you witness the broken, ruined side of him.
But then, you reached out, grabbing his trembling hands in your own small ones, your touch warm and gentle. "Please, stay," you whispered, your voice filled with concern. Slowly, you began rubbing his cold hands, trying to bring warmth back to him, both in body and spirit.
His breathing was still uneven, but your soft words and the warmth of your touch soothed him. He looked up, meeting your eyes for the first time. There was no disgust there, no fear—only worry and care. Just like before. Slowly, the tension began to leave his body, and for the first time since he had fled that terrible place, Aemond felt a glimmer of relief.
He swallowed hard, his voice barely a whisper. “I… I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to see me like this.”
You shook your head, squeezing his hands a little tighter. "I don’t care about your face, Aemond," you murmured softly, your tired lilac eyes meeting his. "I care about you."
As you gently laid back onto your pillow, you looked at Aemond with concern, urging him to lie beside you. He hesitated for a moment, but slowly, he did as you asked, his awkward frame seeming out of place in your small bed. You turned to face him, your wide lilac eyes full of care, while Aemond’s own single violet eye struggled to meet yours.
With quiet care, you reached out, placing your small hand on his scarred cheek. He flinched at first, his breath catching in his throat, but you didn’t pull away. Your fingers traced the jagged line of the scar that ran down his face, the skin rough beneath your touch. It was as if you weren’t looking at the scar at all, just him—Aemond, your beloved uncle, the boy who protected you, who read to you, who you always knew to be brave.
He shivered under your touch, his emotions twisting inside him. But you said nothing more, just a quiet, simple comfort.
“Sleep, Aemond,” you whispered softly, your voice gentle and soothing. “I’ll be here when you wake.”
The words wrapped around him like a balm, a promise in the soft glow of the dim candlelight. For so long, Aemond had carried his burdens alone, but in this moment, with your hand on his face and your soft breath mingling with the night air, he felt something he hadn’t allowed himself to feel since Driftmark—peace.
His eye fluttered shut, and with the rhythm of your breathing beside him, he let himself drift away, finally surrendering to sleep.
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Aemond entered your chambers quietly, the weight of the box in his hands almost insignificant compared to the heaviness that lingered in the air. He had been allowed to visit freely now, thanks to Ser Rowan's softening stance, but each visit felt like walking on a thread, delicate and uncertain.
He paused when he saw you on the chaise, struggling with your embroidery. The soft light from the window highlighted the paleness of your features—still recovering, still distant, but better than before. You were eating now, and though your mood hadn't brightened, that small improvement brought Aemond some comfort. He cherished these moments, even if they were shrouded in silence.
"I've brought something for you," he said, his voice steady yet quiet as he approached.
You glanced up from your work but said nothing. The tangled mess of threads on the pillow caught his eye, and he bent slightly to inspect it, attempting to mask the awkwardness he always felt in the wake of that night. He hadn’t been ready to speak of it, and thankfully, neither had you.
"That’s a nice lion," Aemond offered, pointing to the uneven form stitched into the fabric.
Your lips parted slightly, a faint glimmer of amusement mixing with frustration as you murmured, "It was supposed to be the Queen."
Aemond’s lips twitched in response, nodding solemnly as if in deep thought. "Now that you say it," he replied, his voice light, "I do recognize her hair."
With a small sigh, you tossed the pillow aside like it was something offensive, watching as it tumbled to the floor, forgotten. Your eyes flickered towards the box in Aemond’s hands, suspicion mingling with curiosity.
"What have you brought me?" you asked, your voice quiet, but holding a hint of anticipation.
Aemond didn’t reply at first, simply stepping forward and offering the box to you, his expression unreadable. You hesitated for a moment, then carefully took it from him.
Your fingers trembled slightly as you lifted the lid, pulling back the fine paper that covered the gift inside. A soft gasp escaped your lips as you uncovered a stunning gown—lilac silk adorned with delicate embroidery, tiny jewels catching the light like stars. Your hands traced the fabric, feeling the softness beneath your fingertips, the craftsmanship clear in every stitch.
Aemond watched you intently, his eyes never leaving your face. For the first time in what felt like forever, there was a shift in your expression—a glimmer of something that almost resembled joy.
"Do you like it?" he asked, his voice low, holding his breath as he awaited your response.
You glanced up at him, and for the first time in many moons, you smiled. It was small, barely there, but it warmed Aemond's heart like the sun after a long winter.
"Yes, I do," you replied softly, still admiring the gown. "What's it for?"
"Helaena's wedding."
At once, the warmth in the room seemed to drain away. The smile you had given Aemond, fleeting as it was, vanished, leaving a hollow silence in its wake. His heart sank, watching as you carefully folded the gown, tucking it back into the box with deliberate gentleness. The delicate fabric crinkled under your hands as though it were something too precious to be touched, something that no longer belonged to you.
"I'm afraid you've wasted your efforts," you said, your voice barely above a whisper, your gaze fixed on the gown. "I'm not going."
Aemond's brow furrowed, frustration bubbling beneath his calm exterior. He stepped closer, his voice steady yet urgent. "You have to go."
But you refused to meet his eye. You knew how intense his gaze could be, how easily it could pierce through your defenses. Staring at the box instead, you shook your head, your words coming out firm, resolute. "I won't."
Aemond's lips pressed into a thin line, the familiar weight of your stubbornness settling between you both. "Helaena needs you," he urged, his tone softening, as if pleading might sway you.
You let out a bitter sigh, your fingers tracing the edge of the box, a dull ache settling in your chest. "Well, perhaps I can hurt her the same way she hurt me," you muttered, your words tinged with petulance, though the pain beneath them was clear.
Aemond stood in silence for a long moment, weighing your words, the tension in the air thick between you. His voice, quieter this time, broke the silence like a whisper carried on the wind. "Will you really not go?"
"No," you replied, though your voice softened now, the sharp edge of defiance fading. You hesitated, a flicker of doubt crossing your face. You raised your chin, trying to hold onto the last bit of resolve. "Now, is that all you've come to visit me for?"
Aemond's heart ached at the sight of you—so distant, so caught in your own sorrow. He stood there, unsure of how to reach you, the distance between you feeling far more than just the space in the room.
The day of Helaena’s wedding arrived, and just as you had promised, you didn’t go. Aemond had come to your chambers in the morning, his expression pleading as he urged you one last time to change your mind. His words were careful, filled with the weight of his disappointment, but still, you remained firm.
You had refused.
As the sun set, casting a warm golden hue across the castle walls, you lay alone in your chambers, curled beneath the thick blankets on your bed. The echoes of the celebrations reached your ears in faint murmurs, muffled by the heavy stone of the keep. The joyous sounds of laughter and music only seemed to deepen the ache in your heart.
It was when night fell fully that the tears came, slow at first, then faster, spilling onto your pillow as regret took hold of you. You wiped your eyes with the back of your hand, but it did little to stop the sadness that had finally caught up to you. You could see it so clearly in your mind—Helaena standing alone in the grand Sept, a pale and fragile figure, her face drawn with sorrow. You imagined her forced to marry Aegon, the brother you both knew was unfit for her, and the weight of your absence pressed hard on your chest.
How could you not have been there for her?
The thought made you feel smaller, childish even. You had let your anger and hurt guide you, and in doing so, you had abandoned Helaena on one of the worst days of her life. She was likely miserable, her heart heavy with sadness, and you, spiteful and stubborn, had stayed away. You bit your lip, choking back a sob.
Your gaze drifted to the gown Aemond had gifted you, still lying folded neatly in the box by your bedside, untouched, its lilac fabric gleaming faintly in the moonlight. You reached for it now, pulling the soft material through your fingers as though it could offer you some comfort.
But it didn’t.
It only reminded you of the mistake you had made.
You missed your mother.
For all the hurt she caused, all the ways she had abandoned you, there was still a deep ache for her, like a wound that wouldn’t heal. You wanted to hate her, truly despise her for leaving you behind. But no matter how much you tried, you couldn’t. The love for her still clung to you like a shadow you couldn’t lose.
As the days passed in the quiet isolation of your chambers, you began to understand things you hadn’t before. With each lonely hour, the weight of your thoughts pressed harder on your heart. Your mother had been selfish, more than you had ever allowed yourself to admit. She had promised you the world, and yet, in the end, she had given you nothing.
You were her firstborn, the eldest of her children, and yet the title that should have been yours had been passed to Jace. He was her heir to the Iron Throne, the future king, while you were left to the shadows. Even Driftmark, the seat of your grandsire, should have been yours by birthright, but it had been given to Luke instead.
The bitterness inside you grew with every thought. You hated them now—your brothers. You knew it was childish, petulant even, but the feelings were there, and they wouldn’t leave. They had taken everything from you. Titles that were rightfully yours, the pride of riding dragons, and worst of all, they still had your mother. They were together as one big happy family on Dragonstone, while you had been left here in King's Landing, a forgotten daughter in the midst of their enemies.
“It’s fine,” you whispered to yourself in the dark, trying to believe it. You had never liked Dragonstone anyway, with its cold winds and sharp rocks. But even as you said it, your heart tightened with the lie. You missed the place, the warmth of the hearth, the sight of the sea from your window, and the feeling of belonging—something you hadn’t felt in so long.
And in the quiet moments, when the anger settled and the room was still, you knew the truth. It wasn’t your brothers’ fault. They hadn’t asked for this, to be born as they were, with all the whispers and shadows cast over their lineage. No, it was your mother’s choices that had led to this. Her indiscretions. But even as that truth formed in your mind, you found that you couldn’t hate her.
It was easier to be angry with them—with Jace and Luke—because hating her, the one you loved most, was something you just couldn’t bear.
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"I hated you, you know."
Aemond's head jerked up, eyes widening at the unexpected words. He had been sitting quietly in your chambers, absorbed in a thick tome about the horrors of Essos. You stood across the room, brush in hand, painting the pink walls of your chamber as if it were any other day. But there was a tension in the air, a weight to your voice that made his heart quicken.
You didn’t look at him, your gaze fixed on the canvas as you murmured, "When you claimed Vhagar, I hated you."
The words hung in the air, sharp and heavy. Aemond’s mouth parted slightly, but no words came out. His heart pounded in his chest as he watched you. The stillness of the room was broken only by the soft strokes of your brush against the canvas.
"I feel as if I hate everyone," you continued, voice tight and strained. "I hate Luke and Jace for stealing my titles." Your brush moved faster, more aggressively. "I hate Daemon for stealing my mother. I even hate Baela and Rhaena, if only because they get to have her now, as if she’s theirs instead of mine."
A scoff escaped your lips, but the sound was bitter. Aemond noticed the way your hand trembled slightly, how your breath caught as tears glistened in your lilac eyes.
"I hated Helaena for not running away with me," you whispered, the words coming out choked. "And I hate myself for not having a dragon, for not being someone important, someone worthy of a title."
Tears began streaming down your face, and yet you kept painting, as if the act itself could somehow keep the flood of emotions at bay. Finally, your gaze lifted from the canvas and met Aemond’s. His heart clenched at the sight of your tear-streaked face.
"And I hated you," you said, voice breaking, "for claiming Vhagar and leaving me alone in this world."
The sob that followed was wrenching, and Aemond couldn’t stay still any longer. He moved toward you, closing the distance between you both with careful, deliberate steps. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you into his chest, your head resting on his shoulder as you wept.
"I don’t want to feel this way," you cried into his tunic, voice muffled and raw. "So pathetic, so angry at everyone. But I can’t help it. And yet, no matter how hard I try, I can never hate her."
Aemond’s chest tightened at your words, his own emotions swirling in a storm he didn’t know how to express. He rested his chin gently on your head, holding you as tightly as he dared, feeling the weight of your pain as if it were his own.
"I know," he whispered softly, his voice rough with emotion. "I know."
And so he held you, offering no more words, just the quiet comfort of his presence as your tears slowly soaked into his shoulder. He wished he could consume your pain and take it away, wished he could make things right. But all he could do was stand there, arms around you, as the world outside seemed so far away.
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“How is Helaena?”
It was the first time in what felt like forever that you had left your chambers. Aemond had been persistent, urging you to take some air, to leave the four walls that had become your prison. Reluctantly, you agreed, and now the two of you sat beneath the heart tree in the Godswood, surrounded by the stillness of nature. Aemond had brought a stack of books, ones he knew you both enjoyed, hoping they might distract you.
“The same as ever,” Aemond answered absently, his attention flickering between the pages of the book in his lap and the rustling leaves above.
He paused, glancing up at you. "She’s set to give birth in three moons' time," he added, his voice soft, as if the thought still surprised him.
You looked down, your heart aching at how quickly time had passed. It had been almost two years since you had returned to King’s Landing, and though you tried to avoid thinking about it, you knew things would never be the same. “Is her pregnancy going well?” you asked quietly, your voice small against the whisper of the wind.
Aemond pursed his lips, his brow furrowing in thought. “She has strange cravings," he said, his voice low. "And her belly is… large, perhaps too large for just six moons.” He hesitated for a moment, his gaze lingering on you. “I’m sure a visit from you would lift her spirits,” he suggested, his tone careful, as though he didn’t want to push too hard.
You shook your head almost immediately, your silver curls spilling over your shoulders. “I’m not sure it would,” you murmured, your voice full of doubt.
Aemond studied you for a long moment, his sharp violet eye watching the way your expression shifted, the way your gaze seemed to turn inward. "She speaks of you sometimes," he said quietly, trying to find the right words to reach you. "She misses you."
You sighed, pulling your knees to your chest as you looked away from him, your fingers tracing idle patterns in the grass. You missed her too.
Aemond, noticing the sadness clouding your face, cleared his throat, quickly steering the conversation elsewhere. “Perhaps when you feel better,” he began, his voice lighter, “you could join me on a ride with Vhagar.”
Your head snapped up in surprise. “Me? Ride Vhagar?” You shook your head. “I’m not sure Vhagar would like me. A loud, annoying girl.”
Aemond raised a brow, his face dead serious. “If that were true, Vhagar would’ve eaten Baela and Rhaena years ago.”
For the first time in what felt like an eternity, you laughed. A real laugh, bubbling up from deep within, spilling out in a way that felt foreign yet so relieving. Two years of being shut away in your chambers, and now here you were, laughing at Aemond’s dry humor. The sound filled the Godswood, bright and full of life.
Aemond, momentarily stunned, blinked at you in astonishment. He hadn’t expected it, not after everything, but when his mind caught up, a broad smile tugged at his lips. The kind of smile that was rare for him, genuine and unguarded.
“Vhagar will love you,” he said, his voice quiet but sure. He hesitated for just a moment, his thoughts turning to words he longed to say but didn’t. Just as I do, he thought. But instead, he insisted with a warmth in his tone, “I’m sure of that.”
You gave a small shrug, murmuring, "Maybe," without truly committing to the idea.
Aemond studied your face for a moment, his heart lighter at the sound of your earlier laughter, and before he could stop himself, the words tumbled out. "I claimed Vhagar for the both of us."
Your expression shifted in an instant, the color draining from your face as you stared at him. "What?" you mumbled, barely above a whisper.
Aemond averted his gaze, trying to appear casual, though his heart raced. "I remembered what you said—about sharing a dragon. And when your dragon egg didn’t hatch, I decided... Vhagar should be for both of us." He looked up, meeting your startled lilac eyes with his steady violet one. "For you and me to share."
Tears welled in your eyes without warning, and Aemond’s calm composure crumbled. He immediately scrambled to your side, kneeling in the grass and reaching out to comfort you. "No, no, I didn’t mean to make you cry," he said, his hands hovering nervously, unsure of what to do.
You waved his hands away, though a small smile began to form through your tears. "I feel a bit foolish now," you admitted, as tears continued to fall down your cheeks.
Aemond took your hands gently in his, bringing them to his lips in a tender kiss. "And so?" He whispered, his gaze filled with sincerity.
As the tears dried on your cheeks, you let out a shaky breath, though your nose remained a bit red. "But... I think Vhagar is much more suited for you," you finally said, your voice still soft but calmer.
Aemond nodded, willing to agree if it brought you comfort. "Will you still consider joining me?" he asked, his tone hopeful.
You looked at him, your smile returning, this time more playful. "I shall," you said with a teasing glint in your eyes, your hands still resting in his.
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"Princess, are you almost done?"
Ser Rowan’s voice was tinged with exasperation as he stood with arms raised, holding the pose you had instructed. You had begged him to model for your painting when he arrived to greet you at dawn, and now the sun was climbing high in the sky, casting warm rays through the window. Despite the time, he remained your patient subject.
"Almost, Ser Rowan," you replied cheerfully, your brush gliding across the canvas as you focused on capturing the details of his expression.
The knight let out a weary sigh, feeling his muscles beginning to stiffen. Yet he would endure anything to keep the smile on your face; he was your willing captive, devoted to your whims.
Suddenly, the door burst open, and Ser Rowan instinctively straightened, positioning himself protectively in front of you. He relaxed his stance when he saw Prince Aemond enter, though a worried look darkened the prince's features.
"Aemond, what’s wrong?" you asked, your brow furrowing in concern as you set down your brush.
The prince was out of breath, urgency threading through his voice. "Helaena went into labor last night. It’s been long and difficult. She’s calling for you."
Your eyes widened, and you opened your mouth in shock, struggling to find your voice amidst the sudden rush of fear and worry.
Before you could respond, Ser Rowan spoke softly but firmly. "Princess, we must go."
You nodded, the news settling in your stomach like a stone, heavy and cold. You hurriedly followed Aemond and Ser Rowan out of your chamber, your heart pounding with a mix of concern and guilt.
Thoughts raced through your mind—what would you say to Helaena? Would she forgive you for not being there these past months? You hadn’t seen her in nearly ten moons, too consumed by your own sadness to leave your room.
As the three of you made your way to the birthing chambers, the air felt thick with anticipation. Upon reaching the door, you encountered another guard who bowed respectfully at your approach.
"The princess has successfully given birth, your Highnesses," he announced, his voice steady.
You and Aemond exchanged a glance, relief washing over you, and he offered you an encouraging nod. You took a deep breath, preparing yourself to enter and see Helaena, the weight of your past decisions lingering in the back of your mind, but hope beginning to spark within your heart.
As you stepped into the chamber, your eyes immediately found Queen Alicent standing in the center, cradling a tiny bundle in her arms. A soft glow of love radiated from her as she looked down at Helaena's babe, a precious life nestled against her.
Your gaze shifted, and you gasped softly when you finally spotted Helaena on the birthing bed. To your astonishment, she was holding another baby as well.
"Twins," you murmured, the words slipping out louder than intended, catching the attention of both the Queen and Helaena.
Alicent's eyes widened in surprise, and a warm smile spread across her face at the sight of you. "Princess, it brings me joy to see you out of your chambers," she said, her voice gentle.
You nodded, feeling a rush of embarrassment as you shifted your gaze back to Helaena. She was already looking at you, her expression filled with a mix of fatigue and joy. Slowly, you approached the bed, holding your breath as you took in the sight before you.
The babe in Helaena's arms had the unmistakable silver hair of House Targaryen, a stark contrast to the dark-haired children of your brothers. You couldn’t tell if it was a boy or girl, but the sight of the tiny face, so fragile and perfect, made your heart swell.
"What are their names?" you asked softly, careful not to disturb the babe's slumber. Your voice barely rose above a whisper, filled with wonder.
A tiny smile bloomed on Helaena's weary face, her eyes lighting up with pride. She gestured to the babe nestled in her arms. "This is Jaehaera," she said, her voice tender. Then she nodded toward the child cradled by Queen Alicent. "And that is Jaehaerys."
You nodded slowly, feeling a swell of warmth at the names, though a shadow lingered in your mind. You didn’t dare ask where Aegon was; the thought of him missing the birth of his children felt too heavy to voice. Carefully, you settled beside Helaena on the birthing bed, the air filled with soft silence and the smell of newborns.
"I'm sorry," you whispered, unable to meet her gaze as your eyes traced the delicate features of Jaehaera. The babe's tiny fingers curled and unfurled, and your heart ached with a mix of joy and regret.
Helaena's hand found yours, giving a gentle squeeze. "I'm sorry too," she replied, her voice thick with emotion.
Looking up at her, a relieved smile broke through your sadness, tears glistening in your eyes. In that moment, the past felt a little lighter, the bond between you strengthening. But then Helaena's expression turned hopeful. "Would you like to hold her?"
You immediately shook your head, anxiety creeping in. "I don't know how."
"I didn’t know how either before this," Helaena said, her voice soft and encouraging. She carefully passed Jaehaera into your arms. You cradled the babe as if she were made of glass, your heart racing with both fear and delight. "It’s very easy."
A small laugh escaped you, bubbling with nervousness. "She’s very small."
"Yes," Helaena murmured, a hint of nostalgia in her tone. "Just as we were once."
You gazed down at the sleeping babe, feeling the weight of her tiny form in your arms. You glanced up at Helaena, her eyes shining with love and hope, and for the first time in what felt like ages, you felt a glimmer of happiness for the future.
You let out a huge yawn as you finally walked back to your chambers, the weight of the day settling on your shoulders. You had spent most of your time in Helaena's chambers, cradling Jaehaerys and Jaehaera in your arms. Queen Alicent had eagerly encouraged your visits, saying it was good practice for when you would have your own children with Aemond.
The thought felt strange yet comforting. After so many hours spent with the tiny babes, you found yourself warming to the idea of one day having a child with Aemond. Of course, that was a distant thought; you were only twelve now, and marriage was still years away. Yet, the notion no longer filled you with dread.
As your health improved and your mood lightened, Queen Alicent insisted you return to your princess lessons with Septa Agertha. The strict septa had been happy to resume your lessons, and to your surprise, she seemed kinder and softer than before, guiding you patiently through your studies.
Despite your busy days, you always tried to carve out time for Aemond. You cherished those moments, whether you were reading together in the library, basking in the sunlight of the gardens, or watching him train with his sword. Today, you couldn’t help but admire how effortlessly he took down Aegon during practice, his movements fluid and precise.
As you entered your chambers, your eyes immediately narrowed at the sight of Aemond standing amidst the soft pinks of your room, a striking contrast in his dark green leather. He looked entirely out of place, and the nervous smile tugging at his lips only deepened your suspicion.
"It is highly improper for you to visit my chambers so late, Aemond," you teased, crossing your arms as you arched an eyebrow. "Does Ser Rowan know about this?"
Aemond’s smile grew as he replied with a hint of mystery, "Ser Rowan does not know all the entrances to your room."
You rolled your eyes, amused but unconvinced. However, something behind Aemond caught your attention—a small object sitting on your table. You moved closer, but Aemond swiftly stepped in front of you, his hands gently resting on your waist to stop you.
"Wait," he said quickly, clearing his throat. "Before you get angry… don’t. Just trust me."
You eyed him suspiciously but couldn’t help the small smile tugging at your lips.
"Happy Nameday," Aemond said quietly, almost as if he were embarrassed by the gesture.
You blinked, raising an eyebrow. "Aemond, my nameday was a week ago."
"Still," he muttered, avoiding your gaze for a moment.
With curiosity getting the better of you, you gently pushed past him, approaching the table where the mysterious item sat. There, on the table, was a small brazier pot, the kind used for hatching dragon eggs. Your heart quickened as you slowly lifted the lid.
A heavy sigh escaped your lips when you saw the sparkly navy blue egg resting inside, hot as ever. "Aemond," you whispered, feeling a mix of exasperation and affection.
Aemond stepped up behind you, resting his chin lightly on your shoulder as he whispered in your ear, "I know. But you know what they say—fourth time’s the charm."
You let out a soft laugh, rolling your eyes as you turned to face him. Your noses were practically touching as you corrected him, "It’s third time’s the charm, you stubborn idiot."
"I also brought strawberry cakes," Aemond said, seeing that the sight of the dragon egg had done little to lift your spirits.
You tilted your head with a small smile, "You know the way to my heart, Aemond Targaryen."
The two of you found yourselves lounging on your grand pink canopy bed, nestled among the cushions, feasting on strawberry cakes that Aemond had brought for you. The scent of the sweet berries filled the air, and for a moment, all seemed simple and light in your world.
“Aemond, I’ve been thinking,” you began thoughtfully, wiping a bit of cream from your lips.
Aemond raised an eyebrow, his lips curving into a mischievous smirk. “My, my, that is worrisome,” he teased, his voice playful.
You shot him a sharp glare before rolling your eyes. With a lift of your chin, you said firmly, “I’ve decided our first child must be a girl.”
Aemond blinked at you, stunned by the declaration. “You understand we do not get to choose, yes?”
You waved his words away dismissively, as if the very idea of leaving such an important matter to chance was absurd. “I believe if I am firm in my belief, then I shall have the choice,” you replied with the confidence only a twelve-year-old could muster.
Aemond gave you a long, bemused look, as if weighing your words for any sense. After a moment, he sighed and shook his head. “Why?” he asked, indulging your fanciful notion.
“Do not mistake me,” you began, leaning back into the pillows with a thoughtful expression. “I love both Jaehaera and Jaehaerys equally. And if we were to have a son, I would love him just as much.”
A big, silly grin spread across your face as you continued, “But I want a daughter. I want to dress her up, match with her, and have her follow me around in little gowns.”
Aemond gave you a knowing look. “You have Jaehaera for that.”
You pouted dramatically, the cake in your hand momentarily forgotten. “It’s not the same. Jaehaera is Helaena’s, not mine.”
Aemond chuckled softly at your logic. “Alright, alright,” he conceded, raising his hands as if surrendering. “I shall pray to the Seven for us to be blessed with a daughter first.”
Then, almost as an afterthought, he added, “Perhaps a daughter and a son at the same time?”
You glared at him, flicking a cake crumb in his direction. “Why would you wish something like that upon me? Twins?” You shook your head vehemently.
Aemond’s amused smile only widened as he met your deathly serious gaze. “You’re right, my bad,” he said with a chuckle, brushing the crumb off his tunic.
You huffed, but your irritation quickly melted away as you stuffed another bite of cake into your mouth, a small smile tugging at your lips. Despite his teasing, you knew that Aemond would pray to the Seven for whatever you wished—even if that meant asking for something as impossible as choosing your firstborn's gender.
You glanced down at the strawberry cake in your hand, scrunching your nose. "With all this cake you keep bringing me, Aemond, I’m going to grow fat."
Aemond gave you a thoughtful look, his expression serious yet teasing at the same time. "And? Do they not say that more is always better?"
You tried to hold back your amusement, but despite your best effort, a smile tugged at your lips. You sighed, shaking your head as you chuckled softly. "You’re incorrigible."
Aemond tilted his head, the corner of his mouth lifting ever so slightly. "Perhaps. But I speak the truth." His eye glimmered as they held yours for a moment longer. "A bit of extra weight would not lessen your beauty."
You blushed, looking away from him as you fiddled with the edge of your dress. "You say that now," you muttered, trying to sound annoyed, but your heart felt light.
"I shall always say that," Aemond countered smoothly, his voice unwavering, as if he truly meant every word. "No matter what the years bring, you will always be perfect to me."
A warmth spread through you, making your cheeks burn even more. You tried to dismiss it, waving a hand at him. "You just want me to keep eating cake so I’ll be too heavy to run away when you’re being impossible."
Aemond smiled at that, his violet eye gleaming with mirth. "Perhaps. Or maybe I just enjoy seeing you happy. And if it takes cake to do that, so be it."
You laughed then, shaking your head at him. "You’ve won this time, but I’ll have my revenge when I’m too fat to walk."
Aemond smirked, leaning closer to you with a satisfied look. "I’ll carry you, then."
You tilted your head, rolling your eyes at Aemond, wondering why he was looking at you like that, as if the world had shifted between the two of you. Somehow, without realizing it, you had drifted closer, your faces mere inches apart. You could feel his breath, soft and warm, as he leaned in further. His eye fluttered shut, and your heart skipped a beat as you sensed what was coming.
Before anything could happen, your hand instinctively shot up, covering his mouth. Aemond froze, opening his eye wide to see you staring at him with confusion. "What are you doing?" you asked, your voice full of suspicion.
He mumbled something beneath your hand, and you lowered it, giving him a curious look as you tried to catch his words.
Clearing his throat, clearly embarrassed, he murmured, "I was trying to kiss you."
You squinted at him, still doubtful. "Aemond," you began cautiously, "Septa Agertha says if a maiden and a man kiss, she’ll become with child. And I think we should at least wait until the twins’ first nameday before we bring another baby into the castle."
Aemond’s lips pressed together tightly, trying to suppress a laugh. His ears turned red as he responded, "Maidens do not become pregnant because of kisses."
"Then how do they become with child?" you asked, raising a challenging brow, your tone daring him to contradict what you’d been taught.
Aemond’s face flushed deeply, and his gaze flickered away in sheer embarrassment. He seemed to search for a way to avoid the topic. "Your Septa will tell you... in time," he muttered, clearly hoping to escape further questioning.
You were about to protest, about to accuse your Septa of lying again—how could you trust her after she said that about kissing? But the sight of Aemond’s bright red cheeks and the way he squirmed told you it was better to drop it. So, with a sigh, you decided to change the subject. "So then," you asked, "why do people kiss if it’s not to make babies?"
Aemond shifted awkwardly before murmuring, "To show affection. It’s what people do when they love each other. Married couples especially."
You raised a skeptical eyebrow, folding your arms. "I’ve never seen my mother and father kiss. And I’ve never seen Grandsire and the Queen kiss either."
Aemond made an exasperated sound, running a hand through his hair. "Well... they’re different," he said, sounding both frustrated and amused.
You tilted your head again, considering his words. "Different how?"
"Just different," Aemond replied, a faint smile tugging at his lips as he looked at you. "Not everyone is... affectionate like that."
"So, you want to kiss me because you’re affectionate?" you teased, a small smirk growing on your face.
Aemond’s ears burned again, and he glanced away, muttering under his breath. "Something like that..."
You tilted your head, watching him with amusement before shrugging nonchalantly. "Alright," you said, as if it were the most casual thing in the world. "You may kiss me."
Aemond's head snapped back toward you, his eye wide in disbelief. "Really?" he asked, unsure if you were being serious.
You nodded, offering him a small smile before puckering your lips in a way you thought was appropriate for a kiss. "Go on, then," you said, your lips pursed in a dramatic display.
Aemond stared at you for a moment, utterly bewildered. "You can't stare at me like that," he finally managed, his voice a little strangled as he glanced away again, clearly nervous.
Rolling your eyes, you sighed, "Alright, Aemond," and then did as he requested, squeezing your eyes shut. You sat there, waiting for him to make the first move, your heart thumping in your chest even though you tried to act as though it didn’t matter at all.
The room felt strangely quiet, save for the soft crackling of the fire in the hearth. You could hear Aemond shift slightly, feel the warmth of him as he leaned in closer. The air between you felt charged, as if something important was about to happen.
His breath ghosted across your lips, soft and hesitant, and your heart skipped a beat. But just as you thought the kiss was going to happen, Aemond hesitated again.
"Are you certain?" he whispered, his voice soft and uncertain, as if he didn’t want to do anything to make you uncomfortable.
Without opening your eyes, you replied with a huff, "Yes, Aemond. Just do it."
Aemond finally leaned in, pressing his lips gently to yours in the briefest of kisses. It was awkward and tentative, like neither of you really knew what you were doing, but it was soft and sweet in its own way.
When he pulled back, you opened your eyes, blinking at him. The two of you sat there for a moment, staring at each other in silence, unsure of what to say or do next.
"Well?" Aemond asked, his voice low, his cheeks still a little flushed. "How was that?"
You pursed your lips, considering. "It wasn’t so bad," you admitted, then smiled, a hint of mischief in your eyes. "But I don't think that’ll make me with child, so Septa Agertha must be wrong after all."
Aemond let out a small, relieved chuckle, the tension easing from his shoulders. "No," he agreed quietly, "that won't make you with child."
You both shared a soft laugh, the awkwardness melting away as you realized it wasn’t as strange or nerve-wracking as you thought it would be.
Still, after a moment, you tilted your head and added thoughtfully, "Mayhaps we can try again another time... just to make sure."
Aemond’s face broke into a wide grin at your words, and he shook his head, still amused. "Whenever you like," he promised softly, his voice full of warmth.
Aemond’s smile remained as you shared a quiet moment, a comfortable warmth settling between the two of you. His words, soft and full of promise, made your heart flutter a little, though you tried to ignore it. Just as you were about to speak, a strange sound filled the room.
You paused, frowning in confusion as the sound persisted. Aemond’s brow furrowed, and he gave you the same puzzled look. "What is that?" you asked, your voice low and uncertain.
Before Aemond could answer, the sound came again, louder this time—a soft, irregular rattling, like something gently tapping against metal. Both of you turned your heads toward the source of the noise, your eyes settling on the small brazier pot resting on the table beside your chaise.
The pot was trembling slightly, the lid shifting ever so subtly as if something within was stirring to life.
You exchanged a wary glance with Aemond, both of you too stunned to speak. Hope flickered in your chest, a fragile, cautious feeling that you tried desperately to suppress, even though it grew with each passing second. You didn’t want to feel it—not again. Not after so many failed attempts, so many disappointments.
But as the rattling continued, you couldn’t help but let that hope bloom, filling your chest with an almost painful intensity. You could feel Aemond's steady gaze on you, as if he too shared your mixture of anticipation and disbelief. His hand lightly touched your arm, offering silent reassurance as you both stood frozen in place.
Finally, the rattling grew louder, more insistent. Aemond moved first, stepping cautiously toward the brazier pot, his movements careful, as if approaching something fragile and dangerous all at once.
Your heart pounded in your ears as Aemond gently reached out and lifted the lid.
For a moment, there was nothing but silence. You held your breath, waiting, expecting the worst, but then—
A small, sharp crack echoed through the air, and your breath hitched in your throat. Aemond’s eye widened in astonishment as he stepped back slightly, motioning for you to come closer.
With shaky steps, you moved forward, peering into the brazier pot. Inside, nestled among the glowing embers, was the dragon egg—your dragon egg. And it was moving.
Tiny cracks began to spread across the surface, like delicate lines etched into stone. A tiny chirp escaped from within, soft yet insistent, and your heart leapt in your chest.
Aemond’s voice was barely a whisper, full of wonder. "It’s hatching."
You didn’t dare speak, afraid that if you did, the fragile moment would shatter. Instead, you watched in awe as the cracks grew wider, the shell breaking apart bit by bit.
Slowly, a tiny snout poked through the shell, followed by a pair of gleaming, sapphire-blue eyes that blinked up at you curiously.
Aemond’s hand slipped into yours, giving it a gentle squeeze, and for the first time in what felt like an eternity, you allowed yourself to smile.
"It’s really happening," you whispered, barely able to contain the joy welling up inside you.
Aemond stood beside you, his gaze never leaving the hatchling, and he nodded, his voice low but filled with a kind of quiet awe. "Yes, it is."
The tiny dragon stretched its delicate wings, the membrane translucent in the firelight, revealing the rich, dark blue that shimmered against the glow. It was so small, fragile even, yet there was a certain strength in its movements, as though it knew its place in the world. Its scales appeared nearly black in the dim light, but with each flicker of the brazier’s flame, a glint of deep sapphire blue reflected back at you, shimmering like the ocean at night.
You couldn't hold back the soft laugh that bubbled from your lips, a sound of pure, unrestrained joy. Your laughter caught the attention of the little dragon, whose head turned sharply towards you. It blinked, tilting its head, studying you with wide, curious eyes before letting out a sharp screech in response. The sound, though high-pitched, was surprisingly strong for such a tiny creature.
Tears welled up in your eyes, threatening to spill over, as you knelt closer, your hand trembling slightly as you reached out, but you stopped just short of touching it. It felt too precious, too delicate to handle without care.
"Hello," you murmured, your voice soft and gentle, as though speaking to an infant. "Aren't you absolutely beautiful."
The little dragon blinked again, watching you intently. Its tiny nostrils flared as it took in the scent of the air, its wings fluttering slightly as it made a sound that almost resembled a purr. You couldn't help but smile wider, your heart swelling with affection.
Aemond crouched down beside you, his hand resting lightly on your shoulder as he watched the dragon with a look of pride and admiration. "You were meant for each other," he said, his voice filled with certainty.
You looked up at him, tears still brimming in your eyes, and nodded. "I think so," you whispered.
For a long moment, the two of you sat there in quiet awe, watching as the dragon stretched its limbs, adjusting to the world it had just entered. It was strange how something so small could carry such weight, as if this tiny creature already held within it the potential for something great, something magnificent.
As the little dragon shifted closer to you, its warmth radiated through the air, and you felt a bond forming, something deeper than words could express. This was more than just a pet, more than a companion. This was a piece of your soul, reflected in scales and wings, fire and strength.
Aemond’s smile softened as he watched you with the newborn dragon, his gaze flicking between the two of you with a quiet fondness. "What will you name it?" he asked, his voice barely above a murmur, as though speaking too loudly might shatter the moment.
You beamed at the little creature before you, a warmth blooming in your chest as you finally dared to reach out. Gently, you brushed your knuckle against her soft, dark scales. She—yes, she was definitely a girl, you were certain of it—immediately leaned into your touch, her tiny body pressing closer, as if seeking comfort from your warmth.
"Treasure," you whispered, the name slipping from your lips without hesitation. A wide, contented smile grew on your face. "Her name is Treasure."
Aemond blinked, momentarily taken aback by the unexpected name, but then a grin spread across his face, lighting up his features. Of course, you would name your dragon something soft, something sweet and endearing. It was just like you to choose a name that carried such a feeling of warmth, rather than something fierce and grand.
He chuckled softly, shaking his head in amusement. "Treasure?" he repeated, his eye twinkling with affection as he looked at you.
You looked up at him, still stroking the dragon’s scales, and nodded firmly. "Yes. Because she’s my treasure," you said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
Aemond’s grin only widened as he crouched down beside you again, watching as Treasure nestled closer to your hand, clearly content with the name and her newfound bond with you. "A fitting name," he said quietly, and in that moment, as he watched you and your dragon together, he could see how the two of you were meant for each other.
Treasure let out a soft, sleepy sound, curling closer to the warmth of your hand, and you couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of peace. The bond between you and your dragon was only beginning, but it was already something special—something that would only grow stronger with time.
this is anything but the end
guyssss help, im literally crying thinking about young rhaenyra (milly) and reader as a baby. how reader probably became rhaenyra's new best friend and was the only thing keeping her going in court. And how rhaenyra would talk to her as a full-grown person, while reader, being a baby, would just babble back. And how rhaenyra would probably walk around taking her baby everywhere and riding on Syrax with her. BYE lol that just makes it all sadder
(side note in my head ive decided to give reader/y/n the most basic hotd name and name her aemma. because when she has her own daughter with aemond, she'll name her laenora after her father)

Treasure The dragon

I can just imagine reader doing that Sweeney Todd trend with Treasure:
ohh mr.todd 💋 i'm so happy 💋 I could - 💋 eat you up I really could. you know what I like to do mr. todd 💋 what I dream 💋
Ser Rowan
(it's rick grimes because I say so) (note I've only watched two episodes of the walking dead)

Reader's Mind in a nutshell
(I feel if I made this into a full time fic, reader could lowkey have saved the family and avoided the dance of the dragons entirely)

Hope you enjoyed!
Names that are in bold are ones that couldn't be added :(
@evernores @jouryuu @dbd-mommy @g-cf2020 @sl-ut @radiantdanvers @sillysillygyalsmh @callsignwidow @missyviolet123 @thelastemzy @lechat-rouge @sonichkkaaascreams @djarinsstuff @yovrnewromantic @waiting-fortheupdate @strawberymilktea @ninihrtss @kenqki @winter-solstice24 @darlingcharling-blog @feyresqueen @momoewn @literishdegree99 @xxxkat3xxx @6000-fandoms
#aemond targaryen x reader#house of the dragon#aemond targaryen#aemond x reader#hotd aemond#hotd fanfic#hotd#aemond one eye#aemond x you#hotd x reader
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Fuck it, I’m Jealous



✨Pairing✨: TE!Terry Richmondxblack!reader
Summary🪄: Your (secret) feelings for your best friend reach a new height
🚨: teensy bit of angst, brief mention of children, language, allusion to abusive relationship, fluff mixed throughout
Fic inspo:
*DISCLAIMER!: I DO NOT CLAIM OWNERSHIP of pictures used as they were all found via Pinterest*
I ain't never been good at sharing
But with you, I practice patience
And I let you do your thing 'cause I'm doin' mine
I was actin' like I'm good when I know I'm lyin'
The rhythmic thud and vibrations from the speakers run through your whole body as you sit at the mini bar watching other guests dancing and laughing. Usually you’d be among the bodies swaying on the dance floor at least once or mingling with whomever was open enough to talk, but tonight you can’t seem to switch your focus from the couple near the tall floor to ceiling windows.
Specifically, your best friend, Terry, and the woman giggling and smiling as she hangs on to his every word.
They’ve nearly been attached at the hip all night - moving from the dance floor to a more private section of the bustling mansion’s living room - and you had to admit, she was gorgeous. Silky, black hair flowing to the middle of her back and face flawlessly clear of blemishes, she was definitely his type with her Hollywood dazzling smile and matching perfect curves. Yet with every flirty glance, you could feel a sickening twinge in your gut.
So much in your head, you fail to realize your other best friend, Ondrea, had joined you after ordering another fruity cocktail. “Her beauty does not take away from yours.”
“I know,” you softly smile attempting to hide your hurt.
“And you, my love, have a line of suitors both in here and outside who’d be blessed with just a minute of your attention.”
You didn’t want them though. Every single one you tried just couldn’t compete - let alone be in the same room - as Terry Richmond. Charming, big eared, jerk.
Wrapping an arm around your shoulders, she leans her head on yours with a soft sigh, “Want me to break them up? Accidentally on purpose spill a drink on her?”
“No,” you chuckle, “and I think you’ve reached your limit on the drinks.” She did tend to be a little more…aggressively protective around her fourth. “Where’s Ali?”
Sipping from the little glass in her hand, her other waves as if she couldn’t care less where her defensive lineman husband was. “I’m grown, okay? I don’t need a babysitter and don’t think I don’t realize you trying to divert! Have you talked to him?”
“Drea we both know I can’t do that.”
“You need to though! If I see you sad about alien eyes one more time imma fight him myself.”
“Aye you supposed to be cut off.” You’ve never been happier to see Ali. You came to this party in hopes to forget your messy feelings. To get a long deserved break from the heaviness - and occasional tears - they caused. “Gimme the glass now Ondrea Marie.”
Rolling her eyes, she’s quick to drain the remainder of the candy green liquid - much to her husband’s dismay - before placing the glass in his large paw of a hand. “Happy?,” she hiccups with a giggle lightly bumping you.
“This woman,” he mumbles in exasperation leaving the empty glass on the shiny bar. “Hey bitty, surprised to see you and Terry separated.”
You’d practically been each other’s shadows since college. Each somehow drifting back after working the room if you didn’t stick together the entire time. It’s why most of those interested became slightly disappointed thinking you were more than friends, which you’d both immediately deny.
“By all means, shoot ya shot. Want me to introduce you?”
“Well, I uh thought it’d be best to give him some privacy since he’s pretty occupied.” Turning to find his teammate among the moving attendees, he smirks watching the mystery, model-esque woman lean in to whisper in the Tight End’s ear. Clearly something salacious from how Terry licked his full lips before handing her his phone. His mouth smoothly whispering something back then moving to her neck as she giggled and playfully smacked his chest.
“Well he’s definitely gonna have a fun night.”
That made one of you. “Yep, and I think I’m gonna head home.”
“Already?”
“Yea it’s been a long day, plus I got more to do tomorrow.” Like sulk in the privacy of your own home. Maybe catch an episode or two of Law and Order.
“Oh okay. You need a ride? Or want me to get T-?”
“Nope I’m alright. I’ll just Uber again,” you quickly answer. From his slightly raised brow, you know Ali can probably sense there’s an issue but he doesn’t press on and you’re grateful he seems to catch the hint.
“Uh uh we can drive you home,” Ondrea speaks up trying to stand on slightly unsteady legs. Luckily Ali’s there to keep her from falling to which she insists she’s got it and he rolls his chocolate eyes.
“No yall stay, I’ll be fine.” Not giving them a chance to utter another word, you slip from your barstool with a quick wave and clutch in your hand as your heels hastily clack along the tiled floor towards the entrance. “I’ll call when I get home!”
-
“We should have another one,” Terry states staring with proud eyes at the quiet bundle in their white crib. His elbows bent over the railing as he adorably coos while fixing the small blanket that looked like the one from your childhood.
“We just had this one,” you giggle jokingly poking the back of his thigh with your toe. Peering over his shoulder, there’s no hiding that boyish grin you fell in love with.
“She need a friend though, she told me.”
“Mhm..she told you that?” He nods moving to get on his knees and crawl until his head is in your lap. His soft hands bringing yours to his lips to peck as he begins to beg.
“Pleasepleaseplease!”
The melodic chime from your doorbell startles you awake with a racing heart and dull ache in your temple from sitting up too fast. It’s soon followed by a couple thunderous knocks that don’t help your already panicked state.
‘Gimme a break,’ you think shuffling to your door. In retrospect, you should’ve looked on your app before opening the door. Or maybe even pretended you weren’t home.
Black Nike sweats covering his legs and matching sweatshirt over his upper half, Terry wasn’t annoyed but you could tell he was in a mood.
“H-Hey,” you greet with a nervous smile. “Everything okay?”
His brief, low chuckle is far from humorous as he crosses his thick arms across his chest. “I could ask you the same. Haven’t talked to you in almost a month.”
‘And? Haven’t you been busy with what’s her name?’ You want to say, but instead you simply shrug. “I’ve been busy.”
“So busy you can’t text or call me back? Come to my games?”
“Wow, one less fan to watch you out of what..hundreds of thousands?,” you sarcastically retort with an attitude Terry had never been on the receiving end of. “I don’t have to always-,”
“You back with him?”
Him in question being your ex, Chris. From their first meeting, Terry couldn’t stand him and definitely wasn’t shy about telling you.
“You need to let him go.”
“I’m tellin you, he’s no good twin.”
The feeling was mutual with Chris. At the mention of Terry he’d roll his eyes and mood would visibly change. And when your then boyfriend expressed how he didn’t want you around Terry, you reluctantly respected that boundary. Until it seemed he didn’t want you with Ondrea either.
It unfortunately took some time to see that so called boundary was nothing more than control. Although slightly hurt, neither of your friends blamed you when you came back with tearful apologies. They took turns being your shoulder to cry on, but Terry tended to check in and visit more. There were many days he’d be waiting in your apartment’s parking lot - specifically in the spot next to your usual - sat in his black on black Ford truck with bags of food in the passenger seat.
“Don’t you have practice in the morning?,” you asked that first night he appeared.
“Yes, and I’ll be there don’t worry twin,” he winked gathering both takeout bags in his hand before following you to your door.
“No, I’m not.”
“Then what?,” Terry asks. “I do something to you?”
Yes, you made me fall in love with you and complicate my love life dookiehead. “No,” you sigh.
Kissing his teeth, his frustration only builds the more you lie. “Look, I’m not stupid clearly it’s something! You ain’t even invite me in and I’m just supposed to-,”
“I just need space Terry!”
“From me?”
“Yes! And…”
Those words are right there on the tip of your tongue practically tickling your lips ready for their escape. Your fears clutch them at the last moment though, refusing to let them go and potentially ruin the best relationship of your life thus far. Your second home you could always depend on.
“And what?”
Your fingers massage you temple feeling that headache become sharper and more painful. “Can we just…not..tonight?” You were nowhere near ready - mentally or emotionally - for this conversation. However like the stubborn, determined man he is Terry can’t easily let things go. Whenever there’s a problem, he finds a solution then and there.
In double time if it concerns his family or friends.
His long legs swiftly bring him over your threshold before closing the door behind him. His hypnotic green eyes intense and never leaving yours leaning back against the wooden entrance.
“I’m not leaving until you get whatever it is you need to say out! I know something’s wrong and wish you’d-,”
“Fine! You wanna know? It is you T,” you finally reveal with tears beginning to flow down your heated cheeks. He wanted to know? Well he just opened Pandora’s box. “I’m..I’m tired of pretending I’m fine seeing you with other girls and hearing about this one in Vegas and-and that one from the club!”
You don’t know if his silence is him taking in your words or from shock. Maybe even unease. For the first time you can’t read him at all.
You can feel the knot form in your throat as your fear tries once more to stop your vulnerability. As usual, he can tell you’re ready to shut down again prompting him to step closer carefully reaching out to brush your freshest tear away from your face. “What else? Keep goin.”
“I shouldn’t have ignored you, but I knew if I said something then I’d ruin what we already have,” you softly explain trying to steady your heaving chest and hiccups. “I mean there’s a reason we’ve never crossed that line right?”
“And why is that?,” he asks stuffing his hands in his pockets.
Was..was he serious? “B-Because you’re not attracted to me like that. Which is fine-,”
“I never said that.” Now was his turn to struggle finding his next words as he took a break from your angelic features to peer down at the tiled floor. Meanwhile you patiently stood there rubbing your ear in your attempt to self soothe - a habit you had as a kid that surprisingly followed you all these years.
“From that first day we met in the dorms, I could tell you were different-,”
“I was one of the crew,” you interrupt.
“No, I mean…you weren’t one to play around. You were intentional with everything you did, had your shit together, and if it ain’t make sense to you, you didn’t want no parts.
You couldn’t help it, it’s how you were raised. Not to say you didn’t have fun and make time for the things you liked, but at the end of the day you knew the important stuff needed to get done.
“I knew I wasn’t there, so I didn’t bother you. You kept it friendly, so I did too. Doesn’t mean I was never attracted.”
You can feel your heart begin its rapid patters again, but now for a completely different reason. “So…so what?,” you ask still unsure. “You’re saying you’ve liked me this entire time?”
His Jordans lightly squeak as he steps closer once more. The amber from his Tom Ford cologne and body heat radiating from his chest makes you dizzy feeling your knee wobble as your back meets your kitchen island. His grayish-green eyes attached to yours once more after a quick glance at your pouty lips. “I’m saying I’ve been attracted to you since I first saw you, and every day after we got closer I knew you complimented me in the best ways…the yin to my yang, my twin. I didn’t wanna be that guy you thought only was friends with you to get with you.
“And when Lizard-,”
“His name is Chris,” you corrected, rolling your eyes with a sniffled giggle.
“I know what I said.” So petty. “When he did that, I wanted to protect you from anyone else who tried to hurt you,” he bashfully shrugs and you mentally aw at how adorable he could be. “Wanted to be the only one to protect you.”
It’s as if your body’s in control rather than your brain how you eliminate the remaining space, reaching up to press your lips against his. Admittedly, it’s…different at first - reminiscent of your first kiss in middle school - but when his warm hand caresses your cheek and the other slides to your lower back, sparks tingle and ignite from your head to your toes. Your lips moving at their own rhythm as both your tongues soon follow pulling moans from your chest.
Begrudgingly, Terry breaks first needing air - and a moment to collect himself. His low chuckle brushes against your cheek hearing your little whimper from wanting more. “Gimme a minute twin,” he smiles pressing his forehead against yours.
“So…what now?,” you whisper nearly getting lost in the way his fingertips feel grazing along your spine.
“You tell me. What do you want?” The deep baritone of his whisper sends addicting shivers throughout your body.
“You,” you answer gently gripping his sweatshirt not wanting to let go - just in case this was some wild fever dream. “All to myself.”
He can’t help but smile at the way your onyx eyes, mixed with swirls of ebony, innocently peer up at him through your wispy lashes. “You got me,” he replies leaning down to meet your waiting lips once more.
I ain't gon' tell you to drop them other bitches
But drop them other bitches
I never been jealous
But fuck it, I'm jealous
So goddamn invested
A/N🎤: HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE✨💕!! I hope everyone is having a great time and able to rest. Or if you’re going through it this season, I wish healing for you and to remember you are so loved and deserving of love☺️.
This idea has been on my mind for a while and uh…I honestly don’t know how to feel about it lol it took on so many changes and I feel like it might be boring, but then again I’m my own worst critic so hopefully yall enjoy!
I wanted to have a holiday themed story or two out by now but as usual I am late lol, but I’m still trying to have something out before new years (however we’ll see👀 lol)
#Spotify#terry richmond#terry richmond x black reader#Terry Richmond x woc#terry richmond x reader#rebel ridge#aaron pierre
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SCENE 2 :: HOW MUCH TRAGEDY ↳ you were never not mine — carlos sainz ༉‧₊˚✧
★ : pairing :: carlos sainz x reader ★ : genre :: angst; fluff separated by a hidden emotional turmoil, carlos and y/n navigate the complexities of co-parenting their twins amidst the high-stakes f1 world. amidst paddock visits and personal healing, will they go further apart or find their way back to each other? ★ : a/n :: text posts are going to return from tom till then you can enjoy this<3 taglist form is in the series masterlist btw!! HATS OFF TO EVERY SINGLE SMAU WRITER BECAUSE THIS IS SO HARD LMAO
( series masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request )
carlos is typing... (y/n's pov)
f1 10 mins ago
f1 LET'S GET THE EUROPEAN LEG OF THE SEASON STARTED! 🇮🇹
username oh the admin knows what they did with carlos at the front lmao username can't wait for the races! let's goooo! 🇮🇹🏁 username so excited for this leg of the season! bring it on! 🤩 username hoping for some amazing races! good luck to all the drivers! 🙌 username here for the racing, not y/n’s drama ⤷ username ugh yes like can we focus on racing and not y/n’s drama? username italy, here we come! forza ferrari! ❤️ ⤷ username poor carlos, dealing with y/n’s drama and still racing username ready for some intense racing action! 🏎🔥 username who else is here for the drama? carlos and y/n's relationship update please! 😂 ⤷ username i hope carlos and y/n figure things out. it was so nice seeing her at the race again
yn.user 20 mins ago
yn.user behind every successful man is his loving fam❤️ congratulations papa sainz
username this is a joke, right? after all the drama? lilymhe wow such a hottie and a MOM? smash! ⤷ yn.user date and time🙏 ⤷ alexalbon uhm... im right here? username weren't you just out with another man? hypocrite ⤷ username loving fam? like she didn't just get caught with another guy? 😂 username wow, pretending everything is fine now? ⤷ username guess she's trying to clean up her image good luck with that username this is so fake everyone knows the truth username acting like a loving family after everything? sure, y/n ⤷ username like who the fuck are you fooling, y/n? we know the real story username you're so pretty, y/n! i bought the tickets just to see you irl username didn't take long for the fake posts to start
carlossainz 20 mins ago
carlossainz victory feels even sweeter with my kids by my side!🏆❤️
username congrats, carlos! the kids are your ONLY real supporters. username so glad you’re focusing on the kids and not the drama. ⤷ username victory without y/n? this is peak comedy😭 ⤷ username way to go, carlos! the kids are all you need! username finally, a win focused on the right people. congrats, carlos! username oh god we really lost the great war huh username great win, carlos! the kids must be so proud. ⤷ username this is the content we love. kids over drama! username well done! no need for distractions we're so proud❤️ ⤷ username the kids are his real mvps so lol username congrats, carlos! the kids are your biggest fans.
twitter
boo is typing... (y/n's pov)
lily is typing… (y/n's pov)
yn.user 20 mins ago
yn.user as my boys said: finally a worthy opponent✨
username this is why some people shouldn't have kids. username she's a mess. no wonder they broke up ⤷ username using her kids for attention. disgusting! carlossainz so you're also bad at scrabble? ⤷ username oh shit carlos didn't come to play ⤷ username you tell her carlos!! username no stability for those poor kids with her around. ⤷ username kids must be so confused with a new man every week username pathetic attempt to make carlos jealous. GROW UP, Y/N!!!
carlos is typing… (y/n's pov)
instagram stories
©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.
#★ : my work !#♡𝅼 : ywnnm#f1#fanfic#formula 1#carlos sainz imagine#carlos sainz fanfic#carlos sainz smut#max f1#carlos sainz#carlos sainz fic#carlos sainz f1#carlos sainz x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#carlos sainz one shot#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz x you#cs55 fanfic#cs55#cs55 x reader#cs55 imagine#cs55 fic#cs55 x you#cs55 x y/n#cs55 one shot#formula one imagine#cs55 smut#carlos sainz imagines#f1 fandom
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♡ Pack It Up - CL 16 ♡
Summary: You're so irrevocably in love with Charles Leclerc and enjoying life when all of a sudden, you hear this agitating noise (your ex who is an actor and probably mentally deranged or SOMETHING).
Author's Note: Hi my lovlies! This is my first attempt at an SMAU so PLEASE BE NICE 😭 this is based off this request! also this can be seen as a pt. 2 to good luck charlie, but can also be read as a stand alone 😋 also the part 2 link is here and at the bottom cause fuck ass tumblr can suck my dick
CW: SMAU, uhhhh, fluff? angst? girl idk 😭use of the word hoe/whore in portuguese
y/n_l/n

Liked by charlesleclerc, yourbestie, 745,372 others
y/n_l/n in your eyes, i get lost, i get washed away
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charlesleclerc mon amoureuse, the most beautiful person in the world and the one i get to belong to ❤️
User67 ohhh our girl is so in love 🤭
User32 does this mean the next album will solely be a love album? 👀
jade_distinguinn ✨🌘
alex_albon i just know the next album is gonna eat!
↳ lilymhe who tf taught you that?!
↳ alex_albon you?!
↳ lilymhe mhm 🤨 im watching you, Alexander Albon Ansusinha
↳ User22 yall… its been 3 hrs since albon was last seen, do you think lily got him?
↳ lilymhe 🤫
↳ User22 😨
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charles_leclerc

Liked by y/n_l/n, francisca.cgomes, and 1,549,948
charles_leclerc i wanna teach you how forever feels, ma déesse
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y/n_l/n je t’aime tellement, mon amour. I can’t believe that this incredible man is all mine 🥰
User89 wait he’s using her song lyrics about him 😭😭😭😭
User56 yall ever think about how on y/n’s posts, the first pic is of charles but charles never puts her in the first pic?
↳ User44 it’s not that serious dude
↳ User79 hmmm i never thought of that, it is a bit weird, like he doesn’t want people to see her that much?
↳ User10 yall are crazy, this post has 4 pictures and 3 of them have y/n in it
↳ User05 tom never hid her tho 🙃 just saying
User23 ugh they’re literally couple GOALS 😍
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tomblyth

Liked by rachelzegler, kit.connor, and 379,941 others
tomblythe some photos from christmas break, ready to come back to work happy and healthy 👍
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User51 ugh, could he be any hotter 😫
User33 ehm, who dat?
User00 cringing at the 2nd pic
↳ User99 okay and? U didn’t have to voice it
↳ User12 but yet i did
User0 is that rachel?
↳ User9 NO IT’S Y/N
↳ User34 yall need to let that go, they broke up so long ago
↳ User9 no im being so fr, y/n posted that exact picture when they were together
↳ User56 omg?! You might be right, i recognize that pic
↳ User12 YALL ITS LEGIT HER, ITS MY PFP AND I GRABBED IT WHEN IT WAS FIRST POSTED WHEN THEY WERE TOGETHER OMFG
↳ User66 wait, so what does this mean? I thought y/n was dating that one french guy
↳ User45 that guy is not french, hes monegasque ☝️ and yes they are dating
↳ User3 maybe they broke up?
↳ User72 no way, they just posted pics of each other, my money is tom is playing dirty to get her back
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y/n_l/n posted a story
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y/n_l/n posted a story
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tomblyth posted a story
Replies:
User99 oh sir…
User34 it was clearly an accident, you don’t have to apologize
User76 so are u guys not getting back together? 😔
User89 but why did u have it? It’s been years
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tomblyth posted a story
Replies:
User32 OMG ARE YOU AND Y/N BACK TOGETHER?! PLS STOP WITH THE GAMES AND TELL US
User45 bruh this is so fucking weird, using your ex’s song to soft launch your new girl?
User96 ooooh this tea is piping HOT
User62 Oh hell no 😭
User05 so you’re not single anymore? 🥺
francisca.cgomes VAI P’A PUTA QUE TU PARIU
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f1gossippofficial

169,452 Likes
F1gossippofficial seems like y/n l/n’s ex, Tom Blythe, wants her back? Tom has not only posted an old picture of y/n but has also used her song, which she wrote about him, to soft launch a new girl… or should i say someone he’s knows ‘all too well’
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User96 I can’t be the only one who thinks this is crazy, right?
↳ User55 Def not, idk what’s going on but holy fuck they either need to stay together or get over eachother
↳ User87 i think y/n has been over Tom for quite some time now. She seems happy with charles
↳ User34 but is she really? Tom was the one to end things so she might’ve “moved on” but is wasting time with charles
↳ User66 no way, those two are so in love and you can see it in the way they look at eachother and talk about eachother. I mean just listen the song she just put out ‘ease my mind’
↳ User29 if you’re gonna bring that up, then let's also bring up ‘we can’t be friends’ i mean it’s all about how she’s waiting for Tom “wait until you love me again”
User10 Tom needs to leave Y/n ALONE
↳ User98 AGREED
Use09 she’s probably just another bitch using charles for fame and money, she should just leave him already cause he deserves so much better
↳ User77 not to mention she’s not as pretty as his exes 🤭
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tomblyth
Liked by rachelzegler, bensonboone, 90,342 others
tomblythe the smell of you hair reminds me of her feet
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User40 wtf is that caption
↳ User55 OH GIRL LEMME TELL YOU. so this song is called ‘be my mistake’ and it’s essentially this guy telling the girl he’s fucking with that she will never be the girl he loves. Like “you’re great but shes amazing and beautiful” type of stuff
↳ User40 nah that’s sickening 😭
User76 i lowkey feel bad for his new girl, he’s obvs using her to get y/n back
↳ User56 yall not everything is about y/n
↳ User78 but it clearly is?! All the evidence points to it being about y/n and getting her back
User66 omg couples goals 😍
User90 that girl is so lucky to have tom like UGH i wish
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f1gossippofficial

130,593 Likes
F1gossippofficial Breaking: Charles Leclerc was recently spotted attending a brand event… without y/n? Rumor has it the two have separated 😱
Thoughts? 👀
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User49 OMG DID HE FINALLY DUMP THAT GOLD DIGGING BITCH 🤩
User12 nooo, mi parents 🙁
User56 honestly about time
↳ User44 wdym about time?
↳ User56 i feel like it’s been obvious that they’ve been unhappy together for a while. Tom is also a better match for y/n
↳ User44 uhm, they literally posted pics of eachother not long ago in a loving photo dump? Also tom was a manipulative person towards y/n and he drained the fuck out of her and made her miserable
↳ User56 instagram posts dont mean shit in the real world. And all this stuff against tom is alleged
User32 now’s my chance 😍
User66 orrrr maybe they dont have to be together 24/7?
↳ User94 they always go to events together tho…
↳ User21 well y/n also has a job so maybe she was busy
↳ User50 idk man, doesn't look good for charles atm
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y/n_l/n
Liked by francisca.cgomes, oliviarodrigo, and 784,483 others
y/n_l/n working on things 👍
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User77 NOW LOOK WHAT YALL DID! YOU TOOK HER SPARKLE
oliviarodrigo omg so excited bestie 🤭
User93 omg new music? 👀
↳ User33 breakup music? ☹️
↳ User10 do NOT put that into the universe ☝️
User65 yall i dont wanna be a bummer but… charles isnt in the likes…
↳ User80 why is this a big deal?! Maybe he’s busy
↳ User34 charles is ALWAYS the first to like her posts, he’s never missed a post or been late
↳ User78 omg did they actually breakup?!
User89 FUCK YOU TOM BLYTH! YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID
francisca.cgomes my beautiful girl, love you so much ❤️
↳ y/n_l/n love you too 🩷
↳ User42 YALL SHE ISN’T USING THE RED HEART, ITS OVER 😭😫
Part 2
#f1 smau#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 au#f1 x reader#charles leclerc smau#cl16 smau#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x yn#cl16 fanfic#formula 1 smau#formula 1 x reader#charles leclerc au#f1 fanfic#charles leclerc fic#cl16 imagine#cl16 x reader
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✨sonadow fic masterpost✨
i’ve been doing a lot of fic hunting on ao3 lately in my sonadow deepdive & i’m compiling a list of My personal favorites ^_^
most of these are completed/ being actively updated!
if anyone has any other recs pls lmk =w=
1. Mirror Image by kaleidoscopic_lover
Takes place: All Sonic universes
Chapters: 33/33 (completed)
Synopsis: Sonic is constantly challenged by his “rival” Shadow and can’t seem to form a relationship that doesn’t involve using their fists, until they’re forced to work together to escape a classic Eggman trap and discover they have more in common with each other than they think. As they bond, their feelings deepen as they come to understand each other a little better, but at the same time, the plan Eggman cooked up is ruining their social lives as a pair of robots made to look identical to the hedgehogs are wreaking havoc in their name… and are programmed to be in love. Very angsty but also very passionate.
2. Beyond a Promise by but_why_not
Takes place: All sonic universes
Chapters: 10/10 (completed)
Synopsis: First few chapters are Shadow’s POV, as he and Sonic grow their relationship by hanging out more often. Slice of life rivalry at Sonic’s birthday party as they explore what they mean to each other and eventually live happily ever after. Very fluffy, not too much action
3. Shattered Realities by foggystarrs
Takes place: SONIC PRIME VERSE
Chapters: 17/17 (completed)
Synopsis: Sonic and Shadow travel the shatterverse and end up in a reality where they’re both dating. Classic enemies to lovers with forced proximity, angst to fluff happy ending. Bonus points for being completed & a great reread!
4. The Secrets in our Quills by Nebrasska
Takes place: SONIC 3 MOVIE
Chapters: 24/25 (updated 3/31/25)
Synopsis: After Shadow helped Sonic to stop the Eclipse Cannon from destroying Earth and disappears, Sonic can’t stop thinking about him, wondering if he survived and if he was alone. Then he discovers that not only is Shadow still alive, but he tracked Sonic down and has been watching his family since the event, living in Sonic’s old cave in the Green Hills woods. Sonic starts building a friendship with him in secret as tension builds with GUN post-moon destruction, and Sonic and Shadow are faced with the same GUN operatives that held Shadow captive all his life while also being separated from their family. Mostly fluffy but very story driven.
5. Coming Home by nottheweirdest
Takes place: All sonic universes
Chapters: 16/16 (completed)
Synopsis: Shadow hasn’t spoken to Sonic in years, not since confessing his feelings and getting rejected. Now Sonic is getting married in a few days, and Shadow got the invitation and decides to go with the encouragement from Rouge, who seems to think Sonic actually returns Shadow’s feelings and shouldn’t marry Amy. Angsty but ultimately has a happy ending
6. Wolfboy by Trenchcoatgecko
Takes place: Sonic Unleashed AU
Chapters: 25/25 (completed)
Synopsis: Shadow, the notorious and world-famous werewolf hunter, is in town for a hit based on a tip he got for a blue werewolf for a bounty. But as he conducts his investigation trying to track the wolf, he discovers that the townspeople don’t fear him at all— rather, they talk of him like they want to protect him. In the meantime, a friendly (and devilishly handsome) local named Sonic has been more than welcoming to Shadow, and as they strike up a friendship it becomes pretty clear that Sonic is the very wolf the town is trying so hard to protect, and Shadow wonders if their relationship was built on Sonic’s last desperate attempt to save his own life or something real, and Sonic will have to find out if he was right about Shadow, and he really does have a sweet heart. Fluff and also angst
7. Clean Slate by nottheweirdest
Takes place: Sonic IDW Comics
Chapters: 30/30 (completed)
Synopsis: Sonic lost his memory in a battle and he’s stuck with Shadow trying to get back to friends he can’t even remember. But something his body seems to remember is the way it feels about Shadow… which makes things complicated as they get heated during isolation. Fun forbidden love and unintentional cheating vibes, very flirty
8. Silly Hats and Party Favors by Nebrasska
Takes place: All Sonic universes
Synopsis: Shadow crashes his beloved motorcycle and Rouge strikes a cheeky deal with him to get it back— attend five parties with her so she can get closer to Knuckles. Since the deal is a little too sweet not to take, Shadow finds himself going along with it, but every party he manages to find himself in some unwanted alone time with his annoying rival, Sonic. Enemies to friends to lovers with amazingly accurate characterizations and some of the best writing style I’ve seen, definitely a personal favorite to reread
9. Dearly Detested by queerwolf79
Takes place: All Sonic universes
Chapters: 10/10 (completed)
Synopsis: Sonic and Shadow become fuck buddies after a GUN mission gets particularly hot and steamy and pretty quickly they become addicted to thrill of hiding their secret relationship while trying not to catch feelings. In the meantime, they’re also distracted by a sinister scheme cooking up by a certain villain and shit starts to get real. Super fun enemies to lovers with smut and a cool action-packed story
10. From the Shadows of the Deep by Nebrasska
Takes place: All Sonic universe/ AU
Chapters: 11/? (ongoing) (updated 6/1/25)
Synopsis: Sonic scored a summer job at the local aquarium where a new exhibit featuring the mysterious and huge Kraken has been drawing in crowds to see, but the only thing the Kraken has ever seemed to take any interest in, for some reason, is Sonic. Also, for reasons probably unrelated, Shadow is also missing and Rouge has recruited Sonic to help find him, but he may be closer than he thinks…
EDIT: some of the fic authors are on tumblr, check out their other stuff!
@nottheweirdest
@nebrasska-alasska
@foggystarrs
**red means mature
**these are listed in No particular order
**adding as i go 👀 (updated 6/1/25)
#sonadow#shadow the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog#sonic x shadow#shadow#shadow x sonic#sonic#sega#sth#sth fandom#sth fics#sonadow fic#sonadow fics#sonadow fic recommendations#fics#fic masterpost#sonadow masterpost#this is MY OPINION btw#also feel free to add more
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