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astrogre · 6 months ago

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Astro synastry observervations 1

Disclaimer: These observation are the niche ways in which a placement may manifest, it is the way I’ve noticed it in others, the people around me, celebrities, myself and in studies. It is not the doctrine wide broad way the placement occurs for everyone.

Chiron conjunct ascendant in synastry can make the Chiron person avoid the Asc person as much as possible, whether it be eye contact or conversation, just being near the ASC person. They also treat the Asc person differently to everyone else, almost like they’re afraid of them or something.

Moon conjunct sun in synastry has beautiful reputation of being felt seen but it also can be negative, it can make the sun person believe they know everything about moon person like how they feel, giving them unwanted advice and thinking they understand the moon person well, all while the moon person feels extremely misunderstood by sun and mis represented and that their advice was useless. Sun person may even try and diagnose moon person because they feel like they have a special ability to know them

3rd house synastry can have you wanting to talk ALLLLL DAYYYY with that person. You can even end up having conversations with them in your head when they’re not even there imagining what they would say or what you could tell them. If mars is here, this is the person you practice how the conversation, debate or argument would have gone in the shower or something

Mars in 6th house overlay can make the house person view the normal basic things that Mars person does to be arousing. For an example if Mars is lightly playing with a stress ball, house person will find the way the ball is being held is really hot and want to be in its place or just find small things like this arousing.

Venus conjunct Jupiter is the most beautiful placement for synastry in my opinion. Venus person has so much love for Jupiter and gives so much everyone can see how much they love Jupiter person, Jupiter’s presence alone can make Venus just sigh in awe. Venus is attracted to Jupiter persons optimism and luck especially concerning themes the house Jupiter lives in. Jupiter person can sometimes not even realise how much they are loved but just know they are appreciated by Venus. This placement to me really does personify pure type of love. These are the people who will do anything for Jupiter and Jupiter just wants to magnify Venus.

Your deepest romantic partners may have your birth city along their Venus line in Astrocartography.

When someone has a sign in Venus it doesn’t strictly mean they’ll only be attrattracted to that sign, but rather it’s the qualities that the sign has in other people

Noticed people who have someone’s Venus in their 8H the planet person can be so respectful to you and make sure that you are well looked after. I really like this dynamic and is my most favorite synastry placements.

Highly saturated 10H stellium in the composite chart can make the both of you unable to communicate to each other without a third party and for your relationship to be the main focus of your image, like you may have had someone else tell your partner that you liked them and that’s how you ended up as a couple, or you may gauge the importance of your relationship not on what you feel or think but- based on what others believe your relationship to be. If people say you two look cute together you will assume all is well between you both but if people say you’re terrible together even if you feel happy you will actually believe what others say your relationship is.

Moon in 5th house overlay will have moon person kicking their feet and giggling like a 13 year old with the house person. They can be the most delightful company to have, can be someone who you spent your childhood with or makes you feel like a child again.

Pluto in 12th house synastry can have Pluto person challenging house persons beliefs to an extent that they’re being disrespectful and forceful. They may degrade the house person for what they believe in, I’ve also noticed that when the Pluto is in sag they can act high and mighty over the 12th house person because sag rules wisdom and higher knowledge, because they’ve done the research they feel like they have the right to critique and degrade 12H belief system and ways of life. 12 house is very sensitive and HIDDEN area so the house person can find their behavior unwanted.

Venus in the 7th house synastry can really have the Venus person giving all they have believing they have found the IT person. ESPECIALLY IF THEIR VENUS IS CONJUNCT PARTNERS MARS. This is because Venus is in its home, native feels safe expressing their love and can feel like they’re meant for this person.

Planets in the 12th house of the synastry chart shows what that person does to you behind your back. For an example Mercury here could indicate the person gossips about you, talks about you when you’re not there. Pluto here can indicate they power-trip or manipulate you without you knowing

Sun- can brag about you, take credit for your work, even say you piggy backed off of them, try to outshine you when you’re not around

Moon- can project their emotions, insecurities on you, feel a lot of emotions about you they dwell on privately, feel dependent on you but don’t show it to you ever, this is like the ex who keeps your clothes long after you break up. Or a friend who plays victim to others and tells their version of the story.

Mercury- analyse and critique you in private, share your secrets with others, discuss opinions about you that they don’t share with you directly

Venus- secretly idealize you, they may secretly have a crush on you, can even want to be you out of envy or admiration, secretly admires you. On the flip side can flirt and seduce you for malicious reasons without you realizing, like in those tv shows where the popular guy dates the weird girl as a dare

Mars- hold back a lot of anger, resentment and bitterness towards you, can be passive aggressive, this is like the Regina George burn book energy.. acting lovely and engaging in person but has so much malice within them you don’t know about, can push or trigger you to anger purposely to get a reaction out of you and you don’t know it

Jupiter- blocks you from getting praise, promotions, blessings, can hold back saying anything nice about you, force their values on you, can deep down feel superior or wiser than you so they subtly guide you to see things their way without being upfront about it, it’s like trying to emigrate into a new country and they bend you to their culture but no matter what you do they’ll never accept you

Saturn- can be very judgmental about you when you’re not there, can act like they literally don’t know you when interacting with others, this is that “I’m embarrassed of them” placement, like a private school student pretending they come from a rich family and ignoring their mother when she comes to pick them up in a Toyota, or a weird anime girl being bullied by her childhood friend because she didn’t want to be affiliated with the weird friends status. it can be very intentional where they try to make things harder for you and ostracize you form others.

Uranus- they literally will rebel against you, this is like a Heian period usurper, except you’re the king. Will challenge you, destabilize you, push you to rebel even, that’s what they do when you’re not around, they push your limits, even putting you into circumstances that you prefer to prepare for, this is like the friend that hosts a surprise birthday party or attempts one of those traumatic YouTube pranks on you like “I CHEATED ON MY WIFE PRANK 4K‼️”

Neptune- project qualities you don’t have onto you, treat you like a person but dehumanize or objectify you when you’re not there, can drug you, can mislead you, keep secrets withholding information to create confusion around their real intentions to you, this one screams situationship or someone who didn’t get access.

Pluto- can try to psychologically manipulate you, deprive and dominate, make you dependent and addicted to them without knowing, can be very envious of you, be possessive

Neptune in person Bs 1st house can make the planet person fetishise the house person, especially if the person B has Neptune in their first house as well, since a Neptune conjunct Neptune synastry makes the planet person fantasise about the best qualities person B has and idealise them.

Mars in 3rd house synastry turns conversations into verbal sparring matches—sharp words, playful teasing, and debates that feel almost like foreplay. The Mars person’s energy can feel invigorating to the house person, but it can also come off as aggressive or argumentative. This placement often leads to mental tension and excitement, with both people constantly challenging each other’s ideas. It’s the kind of connection where you argue for hours, then end up laughing and feeling closer than ever.

Venus square Neptune, Venus person thinks Neptune is everything they’ve been looking for, like their ideal soulmate. They romanticise Neptune to the point of putting them on a pedestal, seeing beauty and perfection where it doesn’t exist. Meanwhile, the Neptune person might not even realize they’re misleading Venus—they’re just existing, but Venus is wrapped up in a fantasy. When the illusion breaks, Venus feels betrayed, like “How could you lie to me?” even though Neptune didn’t promise anything. Neptune might quietly leave Venus wondering, “Did I ever even know them?” There’s a reason why this placement is known as “rose-colored glasses”. I think it’s like when fans meet their favourite artists and they end up being different to the image they portray

Sun in the 6th house overlay can make the Sun person feel like they have a job to fix the house person.The Sun person might try to give the house person advice on everything: their health, routines, work habits, even their diet, like “Have you tried waking up earlier?” or “You’d feel better if you changed this.” The house person might appreciate it at first but eventually feel like the Sun person sees them as a project rather than a person. The Sun person, meanwhile, feels like they’re helping—they don’t realize they might come off as critical. This can also make the house person feel nervous or self-conscious around the Sun, like they’re constantly being evaluated and being around them feels like they’re at work and their neat freak boss is micromanaging.

Venus in the 2nd house overlay makes the Venus person love the house person’s possessions, taste, and even their voice. Venus might compliment the house person’s things endlessly, like “You always dress so well,” or “You have the best taste in music.” There’s something about the house person’s values, style, or even their physical body that Venus finds irresistible. On the flip side, this can make the house person feel like Venus only cares about their surface-level qualities—like they’re being admired for what they have rather than who they are. This can turn into “I feel like you love my things, not me.”

Uranus in the 7th house overlay can feel like falling for someone you never expected to fall for. Uranus person brings an electric energy to the house person that feels exciting but unstable. The house person might feel like they can’t predict Uranus’ next move, which can be thrilling but also nerve-wracking. This is that “I’ve never met anyone like you” dynamic, where both people feel drawn to each other in a way that defies logic. Over time, the house person might feel like Uranus keeps them at arm’s length, refusing to commit or settle down.

Venus Sextile Mars Synastry is one of the sweetest aspects for physical and romantic attraction. Venus is naturally drawn to Mars, thinking “I like the way you move, the way you act—it excites me.” Mars, in return, feels appreciated and energized by Venus’ affection. There’s an effortless rhythm here: Venus brings charm and softness, while Mars adds drive and excitement. They both feel seen and desired without having to try too hard. Unlike harsher Venus-Mars aspects, the sextile creates a playful, flirty dynamic. Mars might tease Venus in a way that makes them blush, and Venus will respond with just enough sweetness to keep Mars coming back. It’s that “You don’t need to chase me; I’m already here” energy. This aspect is natural chemistry without tipping into tension.

When Jupiter lands in someone’s 7th house, the house person feels like Jupiter brings luck, joy, and optimism into their relationships. The Jupiter person can make the house person feel like “Maybe love isn’t so bad after all,” as they bring warmth, generosity, and a sense of expansion to the house person’s idea of partnership. This is the placement where the Jupiter person sees so much potential in the house person, encouraging them to believe in themselves and their relationships. The house person might feel like Jupiter is their good luck charm—like everything is brighter when they’re together. Cons are that Jupiter might unintentionally make promises they can’t keep or come across as “too much” for the house person, overwhelming them with positivity or expectations. This placement often makes the relationship feel like it’s meant to be, as if Jupiter walked into the house person’s life just to show them what a good partnership can feel like.

Venus Square Jupiter screams “You’re too much, but I love it anyway.”This placement can feel like a rollercoaster of indulgence and excess. Venus sees Jupiter as someone greater-than-life, full of warmth and generosity, but also overwhelming at times. Venus might think “Do you really care about me, or are you just like this with everyone?” Whereas Jupiter can feel like Venus is too focused on minor details, like “Why can’t we just have fun without overthinking?” This placement often creates a dynamic where one person loves to give, spend, and shower the other with attention, but the other feels like it’s too much or misplaced. It can also lead to arguments about money or values—like one person wants to splurge, and the other wants to save. Despite the tension, there’s a lot of affection here; the challenge is in finding balance between excess and stability.

Mars in the 7th house makes the Mars person bring a lot of energy—both passionate and combative—into the house person’s relationships. Might find yourself asking why you both argue so much. The house person might feel like Mars is constantly challenging them, either pushing them to grow or picking fights over small things. Mars, meanwhile, feels like they’re just being honest, like “I’m trying to help you stand up for yourself.”This overlay can create a lot of sexual tension, as the house person feels both attracted to and frustrated by Mars’ directness. It’s the kind of dynamic where you argue one minute and make up the next, but if handled poorly, it can feel like constant friction in the relationship.

Mars in the 8th house overlay causes so much tension that never leaves the room, it’s intense and magnetic—the air feels heavier just from being around each other like a glance communicates more than intended, Mars is like the aggressor detective, house is the suspect in question, Mars will do everything to unveil house person but they can’t, it screams Sherlock and Moriarty energy. The house person can’t help but notice Mars, like “Why do I feel like you know all my secrets?” Mars person’s energy triggers something primal in the house person—they might feel exposed and aroused, but also a little uneasy, like Mars sees right through them. Mars, on the other hand, feels like the house person is a mystery they want to unravel. It’s the placement where even small gestures from Mars feel intimate, like brushing against their arm, and the house person thinks, “Do they know how much they’re affecting me?” This connection can lead to intense physical attraction, almost obsessive—where the two can’t stop thinking about each other even when they’re apart. But this is the 8th house, so there’s always the potential for power struggles, jealousy, and intensity that burns out.

Ascendant square mercury creates tension between two people, where Mercury person might say things that unintentionally rub the Ascendant person the wrong way. The Ascendant person might think “Why do they keep misunderstanding me?” while Mercury feels like they’re being perfectly clear. This aspect is common in relationships where you debate or bicker a lot, as Mercury analyzes and questions the Ascendant’s behavior or appearance. The Ascendant person can feel like Mercury doesn’t respect their way of expressing themselves, while Mercury gets frustrated by the Ascendant’s emotional reactions.

For Venus in the 10th House the Venus person brings beauty, charm, and social status to the house person’s public life. The house person might feel like Venus enhances their reputation, thinking “People admire me more when I’m with you.” This placement often creates relationships where one or both partners are seen as a “power couple,” with Venus boosting the house person’s image in career or social settings. On the negative side, the house person might feel like Venus is too focused on appearances, valuing the relationship for what it looks like rather than how it feels.

#astrology #astro notes #astro posts #astro placements #astro community #astrology observations #astro observations #astroblr #astro #8th house mars synastry #8h synastry #mars in 8th house synastry #astrology synastry #mars synastry #astro synastry #synastry #8th house synastry #7th house synastry #5th house synastry

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thetarotyapper · 1 month ago

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⊱ ۫ ׅ ✧ what magnetic qualities do you possess that captivate those around you ⊱ ۫ ׅ ✧

paid services 18+ paid services tarot community ko-fi

(how to pick a pile - observe the given options and choose the one which you feel the most drawn to. scroll down to read your message!! remember, this is a general reading, so take what resonates! ps.- if you feel drawn to more than one card/image/pile, feel free to read the others too!! if the chosen pile doesn't relate to you, feel free to choose another. the choice is yours<3)

⊱ ۫ ׅ ✧ pile I ⊱ ۫ ׅ ✧

7 of cups, ace of cups, 4 of pentacles, 8 of wands, page of wands, 3 of swords

OOHHH I LOVE THE ENERGY I'M GETTING FROM YOU, PILE 1. let me start off by saying this love, you are someone who is BLESSED with opportunities and even people know this. things just flow to you very easily, you know? or you just have something in you that makes things naturally come to you. call it divine blessings, call it fate, call it karma - literally ALL the good things are attracted to you. UGHH HOW DO YOU DO THAT, PILE 1?? your energy is literally so beautiful. with the 7 of cups here, i’m seeing that you're an opportunist. and you know what? GET THAT BAG BABE LIKE HELL YEAH. as mentioned earlier, either opportunities flow to you or you just have this way of getting the things you want. for many, the word “opportunist” might seem like a very negative thing where a person is “full of themselves” - and to be honest, i HATE it when people don't actually understand what an “opportunist” means. for me, it means someone who is literally willing to put in the effort to get what they want and will never miss an opportunity for the sake of benefiting themselves without hurting others. like it's good to be an opportunist, as long as you're not demeaning others. i hope you understand what i mean here, love. when i say that you're an opportunist, i mean it in a positive sense. you're not someone who gets distracted easily and you ONLY focus on your goals, and that trait of yours is so damn magnetic. distractions? nah they don't exist in your world. your eyes are on the prize, and you will do ANYTHING to get there. i honestly love how fierce you are, pile 1.

your focus and your determination is what makes you so magnetic, babe. you put in so much hard work, and i'm seeing here that you are someone who likes to plan things ahead of time so that you can advance with confidence. and ugh don't even get me started about your confidence. you've got this aura that makes people go “holy shit”. like people literally STOP and feel your presence, you're literally so hard to ignore. i'm also seeing here that many of y'all might have a resting bitch face, because there's a lot of people intimidated by you - but that's also what makes you so magnetic. and what's even more funny is that you're literally such a sweetheart and once people get the courage to talk to you, they will realise how badly they perceived you during the start and now your kind nature will pull them even closer to you.

and what i love most about you pile 1 is that you are someone who is sensitive. you're not the type to pre-judge anybody or any situation and you not only honour your feelings, you also honour other people's feelings. you're not someone who is self-centered and someone who only cares about themselves - no. you're someone who cares about others and will always think about how they feel. honestly, i’m seeing here that you care more about other people's feelings rather than your own - and that makes you so damn magnetic. you're basically a softie inside, pile 1. people misinterpret you during the beginning because you might look tough on the outside, but you're literally a baby at heart.

with the ace of cups here, i’m seeing that you love like no other. you make people feel seen and understood - your love is limitless, and this makes you so magnetic. people feel so comfortable around you and they even feel safe with you. i suddenly got the word “home”. people feel like you are their home and i wouldn't be surprised if they’ve said that to you before. your love is so radiant and warm. you're a healer, pile 1.

i find it fascinating how my oracle card that talks about security is literally next to the 4 of pentacles. you're someone who is working towards building a balanced life and i see you putting the effort into getting there. you're protective about yourself and about the things you love. you're working towards building a sense of stability and security for yourself. this is giving me very “hard working” energy, and this is what makes you so magnetic. you're someone who is hard to read and you're very guarded with your feelings. you don't let people get that close to you - regardless of them feeling close to you. your protective nature is what makes you so magnetic. but i'm also seeing here that your tendency to guard your feelings might sometimes make you lose meaningful connections. so try to open up a little bit, pile 1. i know it's very easy for me to say, but please take your time and whenever the time feels right, let yourself free a little bit<3

with the 8 of wands coming out next, i'm seeing here that you are someone who is not afraid to get out of situations that don't serve you right. you're not afraid to let go of things that disrespect you and honestly pile 1, i'm so proud of you. because with the 3 of swords here, i'm getting a feeling that many people would've tried to take advantage of you - especially when you were vulnerable. maybe that also explains why you've been having a hard time opening up to people. with the 8 of wands here, i’m seeing here that you are open to change and you're very accepting of what life throws at you - and that's what makes you so magnetic, pile 1. your ability to embrace the unknown with confidence is what makes you magnetic. and your ability to move on from things that no longer serve you right is what makes you so magnetic. you've long given up on your people-pleasing-tendencies and i admire how honest you are with yourself as well as with others right now.

with the page of wands falling out, i’m seeing here that your curious nature and your adventurous nature is what makes you so magnetic. you're always trying to learn something new and even though you might be a little unsure during the beginning, it's your courage that keeps you going forward. and one more thing i love about you pile 1 is that no matter how nerve-wrecking a situation might be, you always look at the bigger picture and you move forward. you don't let your fears consume you - in fact, you use them as a tool to move ahead towards something better, and oh god that makes you so magnetic. and you're also someone who is very good at making decisions and even if you have trouble coming to a conclusion, you will always seek for answers and you won't just come to a decision without any research or a background check, and this trait of yours makes you so magnetic.

⊱ ۫ ׅ ✧ pile II ⊱ ۫ ׅ ✧

king of cups, page of pentacles, 10 of cups, 4 of cups, the emperor, 2 of pentacles

babe, this pile screams ATTRACTION. like that's the instant energy i’m getting from you guys. i'm seeing here that many people feel so drawn towards you and they don't even know why they feel such a strong pull towards you ajhsbahjajaj. is it the way you look? is it the way you carry yourself? is it your emotional maturity? is it the way you care for others? people just don't know why they feel so attracted towards you. but guess what? i feel like i have an idea as to why people are so drawn towards your energy. pile 2, you are someone who KNOWS YOUR WORTH, and you ain't here for fun and games. nope, no no. you're here to show people that you CANNOT be taken for granted and damn, that's just so sexy. the reason why people find you so magnetic is because you only love yourself and you are your first priority. and honestly? i’m rooting for you, babe. like you will literally CUT OUT all the negative and unnecessary energies because you don't want it to ruin your peace and omg i literally feel so drawn towards you because i wanna be you so bad akjsjakkkakak. like i have no words to explain your energy, it's just so……. magnetic. LIKE UGH WHY CAN'T I GET THE WORDS OUT. but here's the thing, there's literally NO WAY anyone could ever explain your energy. it's just very attractive. you're literally the type of person people in public or airports have a crush on and sadly they'll never see you again, but you leave this lasting impression on them. like that's the best way i can describe your energy, but i'm literally not doing any justice to you love😭😭. but like i hope you understand what i'm trying to say here.

with the king of cups here, i’m seeing that you're someone who is very, and by very i mean VERY emotionally mature and though there might be some unhealed wounds, you do not let it affect your judgments. you know exactly when to be logical and emotional. you have this way of separating your emotions from facts and that makes you so magnetic. you know exactly when to use your heart and when to use your mind concerning a situation. you're also very diplomatic and you don't come to conclusions without hearing or learning both sides first. the reason as to why i’m saying “both sides” here is because i seeing that many people might come to you for advice and they sometimes seek your guidance. you handle situations with compassion and this makes you so damn magnetic, pile 2. you're very mindful.

for some reason, i’m seeing here that you might be someone who is very young or you were forced to grow up too early - and the reason i’m saying this is because i'm seeing here that you are someone who is very mature for your age. because like the intelligence and the creativity you possess is phenomenal. i am drawing a connection with the page of pentacles and my oracle card that talks about “innovations”. i feel like this pile is made for a particular type of people. like i don't know how to put it into words….it's like y'all are just so exceptionally great. the word “great” doesn't even do justice to y'all. you guys just have something that is so magnetic and for some reason, i'm not able to put it into words. i’m seeing that y'all are just stepping into the “real world” and i'm gonna be honest, i'm kinda scared that people might take advantage of you. even though y'all are smart and aware, i just want you to be cautious of your surroundings and please don't be vulnerable to people you don't know very well. many people might try to steal your spotlight. i see that you are in the beginning stages of building either a career or something stable for yourself - but whatever you are working on, don't tell a lot of people about it. not everyone is a well-wisher. so just be a little cautious, love.

you are someone who is very grounded and you're currently working on building a stronger base for yourself. you're also very money-minded right now and it's a very good thing. you're ambitious and dedicated, and people find this quality of yours very magnetic. you have so much potential, pile 2. like your energy is GLOWING.

with the 10 of cups here, i’m seeing that many people are attracted towards your “family oriented” nature. i'm also seeing here that many people feel comfortable around you and many people might even fantasize about building a family with you because they know that you have a lot of potential. many people daydream about having a family with you, pile 2. and you have many secret admirers. you also might be someone who is curvy or has a very attractive physique because i'm seeing that many people (especially masculine energies) are attracted to you. and i'll be honest, this “attraction” seems very sexual. like many people just wanna feel your touch and sometimes these people don't even want to build something stable with you. ugh this kinda pissed me off.

but here's the thing, pile 2 - the 4 of cups fell right out after the 10 of cups and what i'm seeing here is that regardless of having so many options and people at your feet, you NEVER fall for their temptations - and that's what makes you so magnetic. people will literally do silly silly things to impress you - but you? you ain't the one to fall for them. nuh-uh, you don't even give them the slightest tiniest bit of your attention and this drives them wild lol. but you know what, babe? keep up this attitude of yours. you're such a baddie like oh my god. i mean, i don't blame them for feeling so attracted towards you because YOU ARE LITERALLY SO ATTRACTIVE, but like they need to respect your boundaries. there's a difference between admiration and straight up crossing the line. i hope you get what i mean, love. people might call you self-centered, but hey - they just can't handle rejection lmao.

with the emperor here, i’m seeing that you are someone who seeks stability and protection. you're very aware of your surroundings and you don't let ANYONE mess with your energy just like that. you stand for what's true and you take care of your own self and god, these qualities makes you so magnetic. you don't let anyone control you, and that makes you so damn irresistible. like your aura is BOOMING. i'm also seeing here that you have this way of adapting to situations and this makes you so magnetic. like nothing seems “too difficult” for you, and honestly - how do you do it, pile 2? like share your secrets with me please, i wanna be y'all so bad😭🙏.

i'm seeing here that y'all have a very controlling and authoritative energy and people find this quality of yours very magnetic. like you just know how to make things go your way and things naturally fall into place whenever you're around. you're like a “problem-fixer”. you just know your way with things. you embody strength, confidence and responsibility and oh my god this makes you so attractive, pile 2.

with the 2 of pentacles here, i’m seeing that no matter how many responsibilities you take on your shoulders, you always have a way of effortlessly managing them. i feel like things just fall into place for you. it's like it was meant for you. you have this sense of calmness and patience when you handle responsibilities, and this makes you so magnetic. no matter how difficult a situation might be, you will always find a way to get out of it.

⊱ ۫ ׅ ✧ pile III ⊱ ۫ ׅ ✧

queen of swords, 4 of wands, page of wands, king of swords, 6 of pentacles, 5 of wands

babe y'all are the inspirational pile, like people literally admire and look up to you. i see here that people don't know if they want to be you or be with you aksnakakkaka. but one thing is for sure, people WANT to be around you. they WANT to know what you're doing. they WANT to know your next move. they WANT to know what you're thinking. they WANT to know how you're feeling. though there are a lot of admirers, there's also a lot of competition and tension here, pile 3. you're probably wondering as to why you might have competitors, and i've got the right answer for you, my love. they're jealous they can't be you. full. stop. period. like they want to be you so bad, they're literally pulled towards your energy - but they also hate the fact that they can't be you. you have this standard and this prestige, like holy moly your energy is so strong and bold, i wouldn't be surprised if people are intimidated by you. and it's not just that, you're someone who is very clever and persistent. god i just love how radiating your energy is, pile 3. like you make people nervous NERVOUS. one look from you and they're a putty in your hands, and let's be honest - you love the power, don't you babe? and in all honesty, you should. because if you don't stand your ground and present that stoic and intimidating personality of yours, people won't hesitate to grab your position.

with the queen of swords here, i’m seeing that you are someone who values honesty over anything. you do not entertain any games and you're a very straight-to-the-point typa person. you don't handle disrespect and you ain't someone people can mess with easily. you aren't afraid to bite back if people mess with you. i'm seeing here that many people will hate how straightforward and honest you are because you aren't the type to sugarcoat things. you'll say things as they are and people might sometimes hate this about you, but at the same time they find this trait of yours very magnetic. they themselves are confused as to why they feel such a strong pull towards you.

pile 3, you are someone who let's your mind lead the way instead of your heart and some people might even call you “heartless” or “emotionless”, but here's what i love about you - you don't give a damn. you don't give a flying fish (i know i said “fish” jsnanfuefnf 😭) about what other people have to say or think about you and this makes you so magnetic. and i love how you really don't care about how other people perceive you. it's like you're living life for your satisfaction and not for others, and i love this quality of yours. i'm also seeing here that your independence is what makes you so magnetic.

with the 4 of wands, i’m seeing here that you're someone who will go out of your way to protect the ones you love. and it's not even about “protection”, you literally will do ANYTHING to see the people you love being happy. i'm seeing here that you might tend to overwork yourself in order to make other people feel satisfied and fulfilled. maybe you had a difficult childhood or things never came to you very easily, so now you're making yourself the “rich man” so that you can spoil yourself as well as the ones you love. and you know what, pile 3? HELL YEAH, I'M ROOTING FOR YOU SO HARD RIGHT NOW. like this made me so emotional, i'm so so proud of how far you've come. keep going ahead and never let your guard down - you got this<3

i'm seeing here that you are someone who is very social or it's not very difficult for you to make connections and build relations with other people, pile 3 - and people find this quality of yours very magnetic. they love how easy you are to talk too and how friendly you are. but again, be careful of some people because they literally want to steal your spotlight.

with the page of wands falling out next, i'm seeing here that you are someone who does not settle for less or you do not settle for one thing - you're always experimenting and you're always growing. you believe that knowledge and experience is what helps a person flourish and you're not wrong. you put your 100% in everything you do and i see your hard work paying off soon, love. i see here that you are the type of person who prefers taking the slow and steady approach towards things, instead of rushing into something. and in the long run, i see it being beneficial for you.

with the king of swords here, i’m seeing that you somehow get people to do what you want. i’m seeing here that people just naturally obey you. i don't know if it's because you are intimidating or maybe because you're someone who gives off “leadership” qualities/vibes, but like people literally do whatever you say. and lol i’m seeing here that people love it when you order them around. people love listening to you. i'm also seeing here that many people might come to you for advice and even if the truth is hard to digest, you'll somehow make them swallow it. you're also very influential, pile 3 - like i'm seeing here that many people might even be afraid/intimidated by you.

with the 6 of pentacles coming out next, i’m seeing here that people might seek guidance from you and sometimes they might even use your advice against you. they might try to learn your ways and use your knowledge and experience against you. god people can be so selfish sometimes, but sadly that's human nature. for some reason, i'm getting the energy here that people might even ask you for money and your wealth is what makes them feel so drawn towards you. i'm seeing here that out of sympathy, you might actually help them more than they deserve and that's honestly so sweet of you, love - but many people might use this opportunity as an excuse to take your place and dominate your throne. the 5 of wands is literally placed next to the 6 of pentacles, so i need you to be a little careful love because like many people want to claim your stature and i'm seeing here that there might be a lot of arguments and aggression if you don't show people who the actual leader is. i know i sound so cringe and corny right now, but like that's the only way i could explain what i meant, and i hope you get what i mean.

people find your generosity, your drive and your ambition very magnetic. as mentioned before, people are confused whether they want to be you or be with you. you're literally so perfect, pile 3.

hiii loves, i hope this reading finds you in good health, and i hope you are doing well. i would be so glad if you could like my post and re-blog it, and please let me know which pile you picked - i would love to hear your thoughts and know if this reading resonated with you!! take care of yourself, and i will see you in my next reading. thank you for being here<3

(note - tarot & oracle cards provide guidance and possible insights into what could happen based on current energies, thoughts, feelings and actions. the cards can highlight potential paths or outcomes, but they do not predict the future in a fixed way. this is a general reading so take what resonates!)

જ⁀➴ all credit for the pictures/dividers goes to their rightful owners and creators

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fucktoyfelix · 7 months ago

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This is actually a useful thing to understand how to spell out. What exactly is wrong with puritanical attitudes towards sexuality? TW: Discusses body image issues, suicide, STIs, sexual assault etc

1. It fosters fear, disgust and loathing of our bodies. By hiding the human body as soon as we are born, and treating it as an object of inherent shame: THAT creates trauma. Shame is one of the primary sources of trauma, its the fuel and lets trauma burn. Those raised in nudist societies, and children raised in households where nudity is treated in a neutral and non-sexual tend to have a much more positive relationship with their bodies as adults. This makes complete sense when you think about it. Going through puberty not knowing if your body is "normal" terrifies children in ways that stick with them for life. In fact, most cultures outside of the Unites States aren't as strange about non-sexual nudity actually...and are healthier for it. We can't have body positivity as long as we are literally criminalized for having an uncovered body. 2. It creates fear, shame and disgust about sex. Most people have sex at some point in their lives. No one would be here at all without it. Most people have sexual desires which lie outside their control. When people are ashamed of those desires, it leads to self hatred, and depression and anxiety. This shame is just as traumatic as bodily shame. When sex is normalized, and treated with the same candor as any other hobby: it becomes less apt to traumatize people.

3. Puritanical attitudes towards sex limit sex education. When people are too ashamed to talk about sex, people don't learn about pregnancy, stis, or consent. All of these things can and do kill people when they aren't addressed with an open dialogue.

Sexual shame leads to people too ashamed to buy condoms, to talk to their doctor about birth control, to ask their partner to use protection, to get tested...the negative health impacts of sexual puritanism have a massive negative effect on society.

4. Sexual shame leads to poorer communication in relationships. Ohh if I had a dime for every person i knew who ruined their relationship because they felt too guilty to talk to their partner about their sexual feelings...Not just that, but the general body shame that comes with puritanism blocks people from connecting to one another too. Have you ever avoided getting close to someone because you were ashamed of your body? If not, I guarantee you know someone who has.

5. Misogyny! Puritanical sexual believes hold that women are not capable of sexual agency. That only men should initiate sex. That women should only ever want babies and not pleasure from sex. All of this rolls right into the next one:

6. Victim blaming in sexual assault. When women are the gatekeepers of sex, its easy to blame them when they 'fail' to protect their chastity when someone violates their trust. This isn't something that just effects women: as the same attitudes hold that men are not capable of experiencing sexual assault. The lack of education and discussion about sex in a sex-negative world inherently prevent the open dialogues necessary for creating and maintaining consent culture.

7. Suppression and marginalization of the queer community. If we're too ashamed to talk about sex, we'll be too ashamed to talk about sexuality. Puritans can't accept any deviation from gender norms either. Anything other than sex between a cis man and a cis woman for the purpose of making a baby is a deviant kink, a mental illness, and needs to be wiped out. Its important to point out that many queer people hold puritanical values about sex: believing that they can achieve sex negativity and queer liberation at the same time. However, sex negative movements always rise with censorship and discrimination of queer people...because queer people are inherently considered deviant by the vast majority of sex negative "allies". It's very dangerous to forget this.

8. Censorship of art. Who decides what is sexual and what is not? Its easy to agree that sex needs to be hidden...but it never takes long before the definition of what is "sexual" expands. Even women's breasts are considered sexual in the United States. Its so normal for Americans to think of them that way that women can't feed their children in public. Drag queens face violence for reading at libraries. Books get taken off the shelves. Artists are bullied offline.

9. Censorship of scientific exploration. Scientific research into reproductive health, sexual behavior, gender identity and more are often hindered due to the "moral objections" of puritans, delaying progress and understanding. That's just off the top of my head. I think its time for people to take how problematic 'puritanism' is more seriously. As we see fascism rear its ugly head all over the world, we're going to see a lot more talk about 'degenerates'...and we know where that kind of talk leads.

#sex positive #kink positive #puritanism

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joemama-2 · 7 months ago

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velvet lies

pairing: gojo x fem reader synopsis: crippling debt and possible evictions have ruined you. working two jobs with no downtime, and a five-year-old son, you really don't know the meaning of taking a break. after continuous questions about his father, you have decided to finally let your son meet his dad. only thing is, he has no idea said son exists. and to top it off, you have not a single clue about what kinds of things will transpire from this sudden revelation. wc: 10.4k tags/warnings: 18+ MDNI, smut, fluff, romance, alcohol, classism, mom! reader, lying, abuse, MAJOR angst, slow burn, exes to lovers, (mentions of) cheating, scandals, death, blood, drugs, drama, family drama, miscommunication, blackmail, unhealthy coping mechanisms , depression, manipulation a/n: eek series masterlist < previous chapter < next chapter

i mean, im not that surprised he’s sexy as hell

that’s actually crazy

imagine hiding your son for five years 😶😶 how can you be ashamed of that

doesn’t he literally have a girlfriend?? himari nakamura??

↳ yep for almost two years now

↳ wonder how she’s holding up i’d be pissed, unless she knew

rich people are always shady as fuck

You don’t even know how many comments you’ve read. Staying up practically the entire night, busying yourself with the endless scrolling of people who have not a single clue of how your life actually is. Meddling in your business and acting like the shit they’re spouting on the internet is okay.

They ranged from positive (sort of) to extremely personal and negative.

i bet she just did it for the child support

i wonder if he’s actually the dad, women like that lie and lie just cuz the dad is rich as fuck

i feel so bad for that boy

Bad? Why would they feel bad for him? You’ve given everything you can and then some to ensure Koji’s safety and innocence. You’ve never put him in harm’s way, difficult situations, hit him, nothing. Of course you’ve raised your voice, but every parent does. Why are these reasons suddenly acting like they know a fucking thing or two? This is insane.

The only positive ones you see are praising your son for how cute he is, how much he looks like Satoru, and how he’ll probably get everything he wants. That’s not true, you’re not going to spoil your kid and you’re sure as hell not letting Satoru do it either; he’s humble, that’s how you want him to be. Still, you do feel uneasy at strangers on the internet for talking about your baby like this, in reference to a photo none of you knew was taken.

And you still don’t know who took it.

That’s what infuriates you the most. Because who in their right mind would do that? Who thinks they’re that fucking entitled to chime in on your personal business—your family.

When you find them, you swear on everything you’re punching them.

Your head hangs low, the hood of your sweatshirt pulled tight, shielding your face as you step into the café. You keep your gaze down, avoiding the eyes of the baristas and patrons scattered around. The familiar hum of the espresso machine feels deafening today.

Maybe no one will notice. Maybe no one cares.

But you know better.

That damn image, plastered across every TV screen and newsfeed yesterday, is still burned into your mind. Why do people even care this much? You’re beyond pissed off. Who in their right mind thinks they have the right to invade your personal life like that? To turn your family into fodder for the public?

Maybe no one will say anything. Who even watched the news anyway?

More people than you think, actually. You keep moving, but Hana has other plans.

“Y/N!” Her voice cuts through the noise like a whip, and before you can react, she grabs your forearm, dragging you into the storage room in the back.

“Hey, what the—” you start to protest, wincing as her grip tightens, but she doesn’t care. She whirls around to face you, her expression a mix of shock and disbelief.

“What the hell is going on?!” she demands, gesturing wildly with her hands. “You were on the news yesterday!”

Your stomach churns at the reminder, and your jaw clenches tightly. You pull your hood down, resigning yourself to the conversation you were hoping to avoid. “I know that already,” you snap, folding your arms across your chest.

“Koji’s father is multi-billionaire Satoru Gojo?!” Her voice rises in pitch, and she looks at you like you’ve grown a second head. “Is that for real? You’ve been hiding this?!”

You take a deep breath, counting to three in your head. “Yes, Hana. It’s real. Koji’s father is Satoru Gojo. Can we not do this right now?”

But Hana doesn’t back down, her wide eyes searching your face for answers. “Are you kidding me? Of course we’re doing this right now! You’ve been sitting on this—” she throws her hands up, “—while the rest of us thought you were just, like, a regular single mom? What the hell, Y/N?”

“Because it’s none of anyone’s business!” you hiss, your voice rising then lowering, not wanting anyone else to overhear. “Do you think I wanted this to come out? Do you think I wanted his world to invade mine?”

Hana softens slightly, her eyebrows knitting together in concern. “Okay, fair. But you should’ve told me, at least. I mean, I’m your friend.”

“I didn’t tell anyone for a reason and I don’t owe anyone anything,” you mutter, running a hand through your hair. “And now it’s everywhere. Do you know how terrifying that is? For me? For Koji?”

Hana sighs, leaning back against the wall. “Okay, okay. I get it. This whole thing’s a mess. But what are you going to do now? I mean, the story’s out. People are gonna talk, Y/N. A lot. Especially if it involves a man like him.”

You swallow hard, the weight of her words settling heavily on your shoulders. “I don’t know,” you admit quietly, your voice trembling. “I just want to protect my son.”

Hana nods, her expression softening further. “We’ll figure it out. But you’re gonna need a plan. And.”

“Hana, I—“ you’re really trying not to snap at her, really. But she’s pushing every button you have right now and your patience is running extremely low. Don’t snap, she’s just worried. “I know what to do, thank you. But I’d appreciate it if you didn’t meddle in my business too. We’re friends, yes, but understand right now that I’m going through a lot of shit and don’t need to be told what to do and when to do it. So get off my back.”

Hana blinks, a little caught off guard by your sudden announcement. Her mouth slightly agape, clearly not having expected your outburst. For a moment, she doesn’t say anything, her expression shifting between hurt and something close to understanding. She straightens, her arms falling from where they’d been crossed over her chest. “Y/N, I wasn’t trying to—” she begins, her voice softer now, but you cut her off.

“I know,” you say, your voice quieter but still firm. “I know you’re trying to help, Hana. And I’m grateful, I am. But right now, I need to handle this on my own. I need space. Can you give me that?”

She nods slowly, her lips pressed into a thin line. “Okay,” she says after a moment. “I get it. I’ll back off. Just—if you need anything, anything at all, I’m here. You know that, right?”

You exhale, some of the tension easing from your shoulders. “Yeah. I know.”

Hana offers you a small, tentative smile before stepping aside, giving you the room you so desperately need. As she moves to leave, she hesitates at the curtains, glancing back at you. “For what it’s worth, Y/N…I think you’re handling this a lot better than you think you are.”

You don’t respond, just nod in acknowledgment, and she disappears back into the front of the café. Alone in the small back room, you lean against the wall, closing your eyes for a moment to gather your thoughts.

Better than I think, huh? You shake your head, rubbing at your temples. It doesn’t feel that way.

You’d be lying to yourself if you said this probably won’t be that bad; not a big deal. But hell, it was huge. You hate unnecessary attention, especially attention from hundreds, if not thousands of random strangers. You’re recalling the incident from earlier when you dropped Koji off at school. Mr. Ito stopping you once more and confessing his surprise to you. In his words, “I didn’t know Koji had such an…esteemed father.”

You held back a slew of insults, keeping it classy, as always. But as the days go on and the more shit that seems to be happening to you, you’re getting this close to breaking that. It’s the way he, everyone else, and even Hana seems so…shocked. The lingering glances from other parents at drop-off, the whispers in the hallways. It’s the way their surprise feels so…palpable. You get it, in a way. Satoru Gojo is larger than life—powerful, wealthy, and untouchable in a way most people only dream of. But still, the shock in their eyes stings more than it should. Did they think you weren’t of caliber to bag a man like Satoru? Did they think a man like that wouldn’t even dream of having a child with a woman like you? It feels a tad bit insulting. Actually, scratch that—it feels like a slap in the face.

The implications gnaw at you, poking at insecurities you’d rather not acknowledge. This is exactly why you hate social media. You’re already growing too conscious of the comments people are making—caring too much and it was just revealed. And the worst part? You can’t even fully blame them. Satoru’s world is one you’ve never truly belonged to. You’re not the glossy, magazine-cover type, and you don’t have the pedigree or connections his circle would expect. But that doesn’t mean you’re less than, and it sure as hell doesn’t mean Koji is any less precious because of it.

You sigh, rubbing at your temples. If only these people could see you for who you truly are—if they could see the strength it takes to raise a child on your own, to hold your head high even when the world tries to tear you down. But no, all they see is the scandal and the drama, their curiosity morphing into judgment. Sure, you made mistakes—big and bad ones. But you’re doing all this in order to make up for those mistakes. And sure, Satoru doesn’t 100% forgive you—you’re not sure he ever will—but you don’t think he would agree with these kinds of comments being made. Right?

You huff. Let them talk, you think bitterly, though the tightness in your chest betrays the confidence you’re trying to muster. Let them all talk, they know nothing.

The minutes feel like hours. Unsure of how long you’ve exactly been here. Equally nervous about looking at your phone to check.

“Oh my god, look. It’s her.”

“Shhh! She’ll hear you.”

“I wonder if she’ll give us pointers.”

“You’re insane.”

The conversation doesn’t fly over your head. t’s like they want you to hear, voices loud enough to penetrate the usual clatter of the café. You swear, they’re practically aiming their words right at you. Your grip tightens around the rag in your hand, knuckles going white as you scrub the already spotless table. The motion is a little too aggressive, the poor table bearing the brunt of your simmering frustration. Your jaw clenches, brows knitting together as you try—desperately—to keep your temper in check. Jaw clenching and brows knitting together, you’re counting down to ten and back.

One…two…three… you recite in your head, attempting to steady your breath. It’s an old habit—one you learned a while back from you’re therapist, one you’ve relied on in situations like this, but today it feels like it’s barely working. Four…five…six.

You glance up, just for a second, and immediately regret it. The group of girls sits near the window, leaning into each other as they giggle, their eyes darting your way. They’re not even trying to hide it anymore. One of them, a blonde with an annoyingly perfect smile, nudges her friend and whispers something, sending the others into another fit of laughter. Your fingers flex around the rag, itching to throw it across the room. Breathe, you remind yourself. Just breathe. They’re not worth it. But it’s hard to ignore the knot tightening in your chest, the sting of humiliation creeping in despite your best efforts. Because you know exactly what they’re laughing about, what they’re whispering about. It’s not just idle curiosity—it’s judgment, plain and simple. And maybe, just maybe, if this were any other day, you’d let it roll off your back. But today? After everything that’s happened? After seeing your son’s face plastered on screens and hearing people dissect your life like it’s a soap opera? You toss the rag onto the table, standing up straighter as you look their way. They immediately quiet down, eyes widening like they’ve been caught red-handed.

“Can I help you?” you ask, voice calm but carrying just enough edge to make them squirm.

The blonde fidgets, her confidence faltering under your gaze. “Oh, um, no, we were just…”

“Enjoying your coffee?” you finish for her, forcing a tight smile. “Good. Let me know if you need anything else.” Without waiting for a response, you turn on your heel and walk behind the counter, the satisfaction of their stunned silence doing little to ease the weight in your chest. Nine…ten… You exhale slowly, trying to let it go, but the anger simmers just beneath the surface.

It’s going to be a long day.

—-

The walk back home with Koji feels like you never want to use your senses again. It feels like a marathon you never signed up for, every step heavier than the last. The pounding in your head has escalated into a full-blown migraine, the sharp pain clawing at the edges of your skull. You clench your teeth, trying to hold it together, willing the tears pricking at your eyes to stay put. Koji chatters beside you, his small hand in yours, his voice a muffled hum against the overwhelming throb in your head.

So much has changed within just the span of a week and none of it feels good. You like change, but not like this. Not the kind of change that’s so spontaneous and out of nowhere that it makes you dread the littlest things. The kind of change where you feel like every way you turn, it’s a dead end. Every thought spiraling into another reminder of how much you’ve lost control, or of how much you never had it to begin with. The kind of change that you never fucking asked for in the first place. The kind of change where you feel like a ticking timebomb. A simple walk home feels like an obstacle course. The sound of Koji’s innocent laughter, once a balm to your soul, now feels like a weight pressing down on you, a reminder of how fragile your balance is.

This change doesn’t come with warnings or instructions. It doesn’t let you adjust, and doesn’t give you the chance to prepare. It just dumps its baggage on your doorstep and forces you to deal with it, whether you’re ready or not. And right now, you’re not.

The last thing you want to do is blow up on someone who doesn’t deserve it, especially your son. You glance down at him, his bright eyes scanning the world around him with that endless curiosity only a child can have. His tiny fingers grip yours with a trust that makes your chest ache. He doesn’t know. He doesn’t understand the storm brewing inside you. And he shouldn’t have to.

“Mommy, are you okay?” Koji’s voice is soft, his head tilted as he looks up at you with concern.

You force a smile, swallowing the lump in your throat. “I’m fine, sweetheart,” you manage, squeezing his hand gently. “Just tired.” He nods, seemingly satisfied with your answer, and resumes his animated recount of the day’s events. You let him talk, his voice a small distraction from the noise in your head. One step at a time, you tell yourself. One breath at a time. For him, if not for yourself.

You wonder to yourself how many more times you can continue repeating that phrase to yourself, like a broken record spinning endlessly in your mind. Shouldn’t you be allowed to do some things on your own? Something that isn’t tied to the constant grind of making sure Koji has everything he needs, of shielding him from a world that feels more hostile every day? Everything you do is for him—every decision, every sacrifice, every moment of biting your tongue when you want to scream. It’s all for him.

But what about you?

The thought is bitter, curling in your chest like smoke. It feels selfish even to entertain it, but the exhaustion is suffocating. How long has it been since you’ve done something just because you wanted to? Since you’ve allowed yourself the luxury of thinking about what you need, instead of what everyone else expects of you? Is it selfish? Is this not how a good mother thinks?

The doubt gnaws at you, persistent and sharp.

Not like you’d know the answer to that question. Your mother—a woman you rarely ever want to think about—never gave you the guidance for situations like this. You have no inspiration, nothing. You’re doing everything free-handed. She didn’t leave you with blueprints for moments like these, no voice in your head to tell you what’s right, what’s wrong, or even what’s okay. She was a void, an absence, and that absence shaped you more than you’d like to admit.

And now here you are, trying to be everything for your son that she wasn’t for you. But it feels like you’re fumbling in the dark, building something fragile with trembling hands. There’s no instruction manual for this, no map to follow. You’re doing everything on the first try, improvising as you go. Every decision feels like a gamble. Did you do enough today? Did you do too much? Did you make the right call, or are you setting him up for something you can’t even see coming? The uncertainty is exhausting.

You glance at Koji, his small hand still tucked safely in yours, his voice cutting through the haze of your thoughts. He’s so blissfully unaware of the turmoil raging inside you, and that’s how it should be. He deserves that innocence, that security. But the weight of always being the strong one, the reliable one, is starting to crush you. How much longer can I keep this up? The question whispers in your mind, and you hate it. You hate that you’re even asking it, hate that it makes you feel weak. But the truth is, you’re tired.

And you don’t know how much longer you can keep pretending that you’re not.

You focus on Koji again, his small frame silhouetted against the afternoon light of the day. He trusts you implicitly, and looks at you like you’re the answer to everything. And the weight of that trust makes you want to cry and scream in equal measure. How can I possibly live up to that?

They never said motherhood was easy. You take a deep breath, steadying yourself. Maybe this is what being a mother really is—second-guessing everything, carrying the weight of your own past, and still showing up every day, trying your best.

You don’t know if that’s enough. But it’s all you have.

It seems like you’re in for a surprise every second of the day.

Satoru, much to your own dismay and confusion, is perched against your apartment door; waiting for you again. Like a magnet, Koji runs into his lower half, hugging his father with all the strength his five-year-old body will allow.

“Hey, little man. I’m happy to see you.” Satoru smiles wholeheartedly, patting Koji’s back with gentle ease.

“Hi, Papa! I missed you.” His voice is muffled by Satoru’s clothing.

The older man laughs, relishing in the moment for another second, before opening his light azures. His eyes look like they’re darting all around you, as if making sure you’re okay. Standing up, he shuffles his hands in his pockets.

“What are you doing here? You didn’t tell me you were coming,” you mutter, walking up closer. Arms crossing.

He nods. “I know, I–I should’ve told you. But this was urgent and I knew you were busy at work.”

A hum is all you offer, unlocking your apartment door and stepping in. The semi-warmth envelops you like a worn blanket. Finally, in the comfort of my own home. Even if it is just for a little bit before you’re off again.

“Call off his babysitter.”

You look back, watching him close your door and lock it. “What? Why?”

“Because I’m here.”

Koji runs off to his room, presumably to play with his toy collection. Leaving the two adults alone. Biting your lip, attempting to come up with something to say—or what to say first. Luckily, he beats you to it. “I want you two to spend the night at mine, don’t go to work. I’ll pay you whatever you miss out on. I know you saw the leak and I’m working on figuring out who the hell did it. But until then, I’m a little concerned for your guys’ safety, so stay at mine until we figure things out long-term.”

You stare at him, caught off guard by the resolute earnestness in his voice. The Satoru you know isn’t usually this serious, this concerned. It’s disarming—attractive, and for a moment, you don’t know how to respond. “This is my home, Satoru,” you finally say, your voice quiet but firm. “I can’t just up and leave because of a leak. And I can’t run every time something like this happens. That’s not a long-term solution either.”

“I get that,” he says, stepping closer. “But this isn’t just about you. It’s about Koji. Someone took that photo, and I don’t know who, or how, or what their intentions are. Until I do, I can’t take chances.”

“And I get that, but I can’t just—sleep at your place.”

“Why not?”

“Because that’s just…weird.”

“Fuck, Y/N,” he exhales out. “You think something’ll happen? It won’t. I'm doing this for Koji and you because I care. Not because reviving something that’s long-ended is my priority.”

“It’s not about that,” you snap, your voice rising before you catch yourself. You close your eyes for a second, exhaling sharply, trying to rein in your frustration. “It’s just... complicated, Satoru. You showing up like this, offering to fix things with money, with solutions I didn’t ask for, for problems I never wanted—it’s overwhelming.”

He takes another step closer, his presence filling the small entryway. “You think I don’t understand that?” His voice softens but carries an edge of urgency. “Y/N, I’m not trying to make this harder for you. I know this is all... messy. But I can’t sit around and pretend I’m okay with you and Koji being here while someone out there is bold enough to invade your privacy like that. I’m trying to protect you. You can’t keep pushing me away like this, you said you wanted to make things better.”

“I know, but—”

“Then stop it. Stop arguing, complaining, whatever. You’re not going to keep me out of Koji’s life any longer, or yours. They already posted another damn picture of you today at work.”

What? You blink your eyes, widening them. You don’t even want to see the photo evidence, gulping down the weird lump that forms in your throat. What the fuck is going on with my life right now? You hesitate, biting your lip. His words chip away at your defenses, but the walls you’ve built don’t crumble that easily. “And what happens if we go to your place? What’s next? You swoop in, play hero, and then leave us when this blows over?”

His jaw tightens, the faint hurt flashing in his eyes almost imperceptible. “Is that what you think I’m doing?”

“Isn’t it?” you counter, arms crossing tightly over your chest, a weak attempt to shield yourself from the weight of the conversation. “That’s what you always do, Satoru. You show up when it’s convenient for you, and when it’s not, you disappear.”

The words hang heavy in the air, stinging both of you. For a moment, he doesn’t respond, his gaze dropping to the floor. “I’m not leaving you this time,” he says quietly, lifting his eyes back to yours. “Not until I know you two are safe. I’m not running, Y/N. Not from this. But you have to stop trying to keep me at arm's length, I’m trying my best to help.” His eyes lock onto yours, pleading yet determined. You hate how convincing he can be when he’s like this. How he makes you question your own resolve. “Please,” he adds, his voice dropping. “Just for a little while.”

The conviction in his voice is startling, and it makes something inside you waver. You’re tired, too tired to keep arguing, too tired to keep carrying everything on your shoulders. It’s true, you’re feeling yourself pushback on him. He deserves this—time with Koji, protecting him, and more. It’s just so hard breaking from the fragile bubble you built for your son and you. Satoru’s presence is like a sharp knife, waiting to just poke through it with ease, to get to his family.“Fine,” you say, your voice barely above a whisper. “But just for tonight. Koji and I will come to your place for tonight.”

Relief washes over his features, but he doesn’t smile. He nods, stepping back to give you space. “That’s all I’m asking.”

As you turn away to gather what you need for the night, you catch a glimpse of Koji peeking out from his room, his eyes wide with curiosity. You put on a smile for his sake, but deep down, you can’t shake the unease settling in your chest. This isn’t just about staying at Satoru’s place. It’s about what this means—what it could mean—and the part of you that still isn’t sure you’re ready to face it.

The inside of Satoru’s Mercedes is spacious, but asphyxiating. Koji in his car seat in the back, watching something on his tablet. This is the first time you’ve been in the car with Satoru since way long ago. It’s nostalgia, but sickening at the same time. You remember how he would place his hand on your thigh, squeezing it lightly. Or how he likes to rest his hand on the gearstick, or his elbow on the middle console.

Your skin prickles with goosebumps when he brushes against your arm as he reaches for the temperature controls, adjusting the heat. It’s a small, thoughtless gesture, but it sends an involuntary jolt through you. You glance out the window, pretending to admire the blurred city lights instead of acknowledging the memories flooding back. The hum of the car engine fills the silence, an uncomfortable contrast to the weight of everything left unsaid. Koji giggles at something on his tablet in the backseat, his innocence a stark reminder of why you’re here and why you can’t let your emotions take over.

“You okay?” Satoru’s voice breaks the quiet, calm yet cautious.

“Fine,” you reply quickly, too quickly. You keep your eyes glued to the window, your arms crossed as if to shield yourself from the proximity.

He stops at a red light, leaning back in his sight. He’s a pro at side-eyeing you as you’re faced away. Seeing the way your hands ball into small fists. Nervous. Your foot is tapping on the floor. Thinking. And if he looks closer at your chest, he’ll notice how it’s rising up and down a little more quickly than normal.

Oh.

He clears his throat, looking forward as the light turns green. Focus on driving, focus on driving. He doesn’t push, but you can feel his gaze flickering toward you now and then, like he’s reading every shift in your posture, every flicker of hesitation. It’s infuriating how well he knows you, even now. You glance at Koji briefly before turning your gaze back to the window, watching the city lights blur into streaks as the car moves. The nostalgia you felt earlier morphs into a bitter taste in your mouth. You hate how easily Satoru slips into the role of a doting father, as if the years of his absence never happened.

You need to get a better hold of your jealousy.

“You’re quiet,” Satoru says, breaking the silence.

“Just tired,” you reply curtly, not bothering to look at him.

He hums, his fingers drumming lightly against the steering wheel. “Long day, huh?”

You roll your eyes. “You could say that.”

His gaze flicks to you briefly before returning to the road. “Look, I know this isn’t ideal. But I’m glad you’re coming with me. It’s the right thing to do.”

You let out a dry laugh, finally turning to face him. “The right thing to do? Since when have you ever cared about the right thing, Satoru?”

His jaw tightens, and for a moment, he doesn’t respond. Then he exhales deeply, gripping the wheel a little tighter. “I care now. Now that you’ve granted me that option,” he says quietly.

You want to scoff, to throw his words back at him, but there’s something in his tone that makes you pause. Something raw, unguarded. The way he gets out those snark remarks angers you, but only further solidifies the weight of your actions, and the fact that things will never be the same.

The rest of the drive is spent in silence, both of you lost in your own thoughts. When the car finally pulls into the underground garage of his penthouse building, Koji’s excitement is palpable.

“Wow! This place is huge!” Koji exclaims, his eyes wide as he looks around.

Satoru chuckles, stepping out of the car and opening the back door to unbuckle Koji. “Wait till you see the view, buddy.”

You follow them, your arms crossed tightly over your chest. As you step into the elevator, you can’t help but feel like you’re being pulled back into a world you thought you’d left behind—one of complications and heartbreak. Satoru presses the button for his floor, glancing at you out of the corner of his eye. “Relax, Y/N. It’s just for one night.”

You don’t respond, staring straight ahead as the elevator begins its ascent. But deep down, you know it’s never just one night with Satoru.

“No running.”

“Sorry, Mama.”

You place Koji and your bags on one of the chairs in the kitchen, watching your son rush to his father’s living room. Satoru follows him, hands on his hips. “Hey buddy, bought some toys for you. Do you want to play with them? You like Spiderman, right?”

If possible, Koji’s eyes light up even more with excitement. Gasping and squealing, nodding his head furiously. “I love Spiderman! Mama threw me a Spiderman birthday last time.”

Satoru hums. “Wish I coulda seen that.”

You freeze at Satoru's words, your hand halfway to unpacking one of Koji’s bags. His tone is light, almost wistful, but it feels like a loaded statement—one that stings more than you’d like to admit. You glance over at him and Koji, your son practically bouncing on his toes as Satoru kneels to pull out a neatly wrapped box from a hidden cabinet. “Here you go,” Satoru says, handing it to Koji. “I think you’ll like what’s inside.”

Koji tears into the wrapping with glee, revealing a Spiderman action figure set. He gasps, clutching the box to his chest like it’s the most precious thing in the world. “Thank you, Papa! This is so cool!”

Your heart twists at how easily Koji has taken to calling him that. It’s like Satoru’s sudden presence is a gift he didn’t realize he’d been missing. And yet, for you, it’s a reminder of the years of absence—of the birthdays and milestones Satoru missed. “Please, don’t spoil him too much,” you mutter, finally unpacking Koji’s things and setting them on the counter.

Satoru looks over his shoulder, a small smirk tugging at his lips. “What’s wrong with a little spoiling? He deserves it.”

You exhale sharply, not bothering to mask your irritation. “What he deserves is consistency.”

His smirk falters, standing back up to his full height and coming over to you. Keeping his voice level calm, in case Koji decides to listen in. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing,” you shake your head.

Satoru narrows his eyes slightly, his expression unreadable as he watches you busy yourself with Koji’s things. “Doesn’t sound like nothing.”

You let out a humorless laugh, refusing to meet his gaze. “It’s exactly what it sounds like. Don’t read into it.”

His lips press into a thin line, but he doesn’t push further—not yet. Instead, he leans against the counter, folding his arms as he observes you. “Y/N, you can’t be the angry one in this situation. I thought you understood that.”

“I’m not angry.”

“Then what are you?”

“I’m just—” you let out a big breath, looking up at him once more. “I’m tired. Forgive me if I’m not overly happy right now.

Satoru’s gaze softens, his posture relaxing slightly, though the tension in the room lingers like a heavy fog. “I’m not trying to add onto that, I’m just trying to be here for my son.”

I know that. I don’t know why I’m snapping. All you can offer is a nod, reaching into your bag, and grabbing a change of clothes. “I…I’m gonna go shower, watch him please.”

Satoru nods, his gaze lingering on you for a moment longer before shifting to the living room where Koji is engrossed in his toys. “Of course. Take your time.”

You offer a small, tight-lipped smile before retreating down the hall, clutching the clothes in your hands like a lifeline. Once you’re inside the bathroom, the door clicks shut behind you, and the weight of everything crashes down. Leaning against the counter, you grip the edge tightly, your knuckles turning white as you take slow, measured breaths. The mirror reflects a version of yourself you hardly recognize—tired, frazzled, and barely holding it together. The faint hum of Koji’s laughter echoes down the hall, grounding you for a moment. At least he’s happy. That’s what matters.

The shower is a welcome escape. The hot water cascades over your skin, washing away the grime of the day and the lingering tension from your conversation with Satoru. You let your head fall forward, droplets sliding down your face, mingling with the tears you didn’t realize had started to fall. You didn’t mean to snap at him. He’s trying, you know that. But the past doesn’t let go so easily, and the overwhelming mix of emotions—anger, fear, hope—leaves you feeling unsteady. And you feel angry at yourself for letting your emotions slip through, getting the best of you. You’re surprised Satoru hasn’t been more outwardly rude to you, short, or even snappy. It seems like he’s taking this all better than you are, and once again, that bitter jealousy of yours is shining through. How he can just handle things so smoothly—at least that’s what it seems like. But he’s used to all this: the spotlight, public eye, attention. You just wish things could’ve been handled…differently.

Everything feels like a domino effect, starting all with that dreaded day at the grocery store. How so much has changed.

By the time you step out, you feel a fraction lighter, though the knot in your chest remains. You towel off, change into your clean clothes, and take a moment to steel yourself before heading back into the fray.

When you return to the living room, you find Satoru sitting cross-legged on the floor with Koji, holding up a miniature Spiderman figure. Koji is giggling, animatedly explaining an intricate story about how Spiderman saves the day. Satoru glances up as you walk in, a faint smile tugging at his lips. “Hey. We’re just working on a top-secret mission over here. No big deal.”

Koji looks up too, beaming. “Mama! Papa’s playing Spiderman with me! He’s really good at the voices.”

You can’t help the small smile that forms, even as your heart aches a little at the sight. “Sounds like you two are having fun.”

Satoru nods, his expression soft. “We’re a good team.”

You stand there for a moment, watching them, the weight of everything pressing down on your shoulders once more. Maybe this is what Koji needs. Maybe this is what you need. But trusting him again…that’s the hardest part.

That night, eating dinner at Satoru’s long dining table, the same one where you faced his parents, it all feels strange, to say the least. The clinking of cutlery against porcelain plates echoes faintly in the vast dining room, filling the silence between the three of you. Koji hums to himself as he picks at his plate, occasionally glancing at his father to tell him some small details about his day or ask about the toys he’d gotten earlier. Satoru engages him with ease, his tone light and playful, but you can see the flickers of something deeper behind his smiles—guilt, maybe, or a desperate need to make up for lost time.

And then there’s you, sitting stiffly at the other end of the table, your appetite wavering as your mind keeps drifting back to the last time you sat here. That memory is sharp and vivid, like an old wound that hasn’t quite healed.

But Koji’s laughter brings you back down to Earth. Looking up from your plate of food to the sight before you. Father and son, son and father, family. They look so alike, you don’t think you can ever get over the blatant resemblance. Satoru’s genes are just very strong. You wish Koji could’ve inherited a few more things from you. You place a hand on your lower stomach, as if a physical touch will make the strange abundance of butterflies flying around in there to go away.

It’s strange, this setup. Domestic in a way you never thought you’d experience with him again. But it’s also…nice.

It feels whole, like this is how things should be. Would’ve been had you not held your tongue for so long. And you’re starting to think to yourself how much you like this sight. How it’s making you feel at home.

But this isn’t your home. However, you think you can pretend for just one night.

“You’re not eating much,” Satoru says, pulling you out of your thoughts. His voice is casual, but there’s an undertone of concern.

Your eyes widen at him, realizing you’ve been caught staring and quickly looking back down. “I’m fine,” you say, forcing a small smile. “Just sleepy, I guess.”

“I bet,” he says, and while his tone is conversational, his gaze lingers on you, searching for something beneath your calm facade.

“Yeah,” you reply shortly, stabbing at a piece of vegetable on your plate. You don’t want to talk about your day or your worries or the mounting anxiety sitting heavy in your chest. Not here, not now.

Koji interrupts before Satoru can press further, his voice bright and full of excitement. “Papa, can we watch a movie after dinner? Mama too!”

Satoru grins, lightly pinching his cheekbone. “Of course, buddy. What movie are we watching?”

Koji claps his hands together, listing off a couple of titles before settling on one of his favorites. You manage another smile, this one a little more genuine, as you watch the way Satoru effortlessly makes Koji light up. For a moment, the tension eases, and you let yourself focus on Koji’s joy. Maybe this is enough for now. Maybe that’s all you need to get through the evening.

But as you glance at Satoru across the table, his eyes catching yours for a brief second, you’re reminded of how fragile this truce feels. Of how much history lies between you, threatening to resurface at any moment.

Koji picks Spiderman, of course. You’ve watched this movie at least a hundred times now, maybe more. You can practically recite the lines perfectly. The movie plays on, the familiar dialogue flowing like background noise to your swirling thoughts. You’ve seen this scene so many times—the hero’s triumphant swing through the city, the bad guy’s dramatic monologue, the moments of comic relief Koji always laughs at—but tonight, it feels different. There’s an added layer of tension sitting heavy between you and Satoru.

The living room feels unusually cozy, the dimmed lighting casting a warm glow over the space. Koji wiggles in his spot, clutching a Spiderman plush as he stares at the screen with unblinking eyes, thoroughly engrossed. You, on the other hand, are trying not to let your exhaustion bubble over. Koji sits between you two, Satoru’s arm over his little shoulders. Satoru’s arm rests casually behind Koji, but every so often, as he adjusts his position, his fingers graze your shoulder—a light, fleeting touch that feels far too deliberate to be accidental. You glance at him from the corner of your eye, but he seems entirely focused on the movie, his face relaxed, a small smirk tugging at his lips during one of Koji’s excited reactions. So, you ignore it. But you do shift slightly, creating just enough distance to break the contact. If he notices, he doesn’t say anything.

Koji laughs out loud at a particularly funny scene, leaning against Satoru’s side. “That’s so cool, Papa! I wanna do that someday!”

Satoru chuckles, ruffling Koji’s hair. “Maybe we’ll get you a Spiderman costume, and you can be the hero of the city.”

Koji beams at him, his excitement is contagious. For a brief moment, you allow yourself to appreciate this dynamic, the way Satoru fits so naturally into Koji’s world. You hate to admit it, but this is what Koji’s been missing—what you’ve been missing, too, in some small, buried way. Satoru’s hand once again brushes your shoulder during his next adjustment, that buried part of you is quickly overshadowed by the reminder of why this dynamic fell apart in the first place.

Luckily, Koji is already showered and dressed for bed in his matching red set. So as the movie progresses, nearing its end, so does his sleepiness. You along with him. Koji’s head begins to droop as the credits start to roll, his little body leaning further into Satoru’s side. His eyelids flutter with each blink, his earlier excitement now replaced by the slow pull of sleep. Satoru’s about to make a remark, before looking over at you and seeing your body slumped over on the other side.

The scene feels peaceful in a way he hadn’t anticipated—a rare moment of quiet amidst the chaos that’s been your guys’ lives lately. Koji’s soft breathing grows steadier, his small body completely leaning into Satoru’s side now, one hand clutching his Spiderman plush while the other hangs limply at his side. Satoru glances down at his son with a faint smile, brushing Koji’s hair out of his face with a tenderness that makes his chest ache. He looks over to you next, ready your head resting on your hand. Your expression is soft, lips parted slightly as you drift into the kind of sleep that only exhaustion can bring. Satoru looks at the clock; 9:00pm.

For a moment, he just watches you both. Koji, who looks so much like him it’s almost uncanny, and you, the woman who’s somehow always managed to throw him off balance without even trying. He sighs softly, shaking his head at the scene before him. For a split second, he feels a shadow—a ghost from the past appears beside Koji. A baby girl who would’ve been seven by now.The baby girl who never got the chance to grow up. In that fleeting, haunting moment, he imagines her sitting there too, nestled beside her brother, giggling at Spiderman’s antics. He can imagine her features. She would’ve looked so much like you, it’s painful.

His chest tightens, and he has to look away, focusing on a random corner of the room as he fights to steady his breathing. It’s not fair—to her, to Koji, or to you. And yet, here he is, caught in the what-ifs and the might-have-beens, unable to let go of a past that feels like it happened both a lifetime ago and just yesterday. The glimpse is gone as soon as it comes, to which he’s thankful for because he is not crying right now. With a small grunt, he stands up and carefully moves Koji into his arms. Adjusting the boy and making sure he’s not waking up, he walks him over to the spare bedroom.

Satoru moves quietly, his footsteps soft against the floor as he cradles Koji in his arms. The boy’s head rests comfortably on his shoulder, his small body relaxed and completely unaware of the careful handling. The weight of his son in his arms, the warmth of Koji’s tiny form, is a stark reminder of everything he’s been missing. He pushes the door to the spare bedroom open gently, trying not to disturb the silence of the house. The moonlight filters through the curtains, casting a calm glow across the room. Satoru places Koji carefully on the bed, tucking him in with the same gentle movements he’s always used. He watches for a moment as the boy shifts slightly, a soft sigh escaping his lips before settling back into a peaceful sleep.

For a second, Satoru just stands there, hands lingering at Koji’s side as if unsure of when to leave. It’s as if the past week—no, the past years—are catching up to him in this very moment. He never thought he'd be here, standing in a room like this, watching his son sleep under a roof that used to feel so distant. His chest tightens, but he refuses to let himself feel the weight of it. Not yet. Not with Koji so close. With one last look, he slowly pulls away, stepping back into the hallway and quietly closing the door behind him. The house feels colder as he moves through it, but this time, it’s not because of the empty spaces or the lingering tension. It’s because, for the first time in years, he’s truly trying to figure out where he fits in all of this.

And it’s a lot harder than he ever expected.

He walks back to the living room, your body now completely lying on your side. His lips purse as he stands before you, unsure if he should wake you or move you himself. Would that be okay? Is he crossing some boundary of yours if he touches you fully and intentionally?

Satoru stands there for a moment, studying you as you sleep. The soft rise and fall of your chest, the way your body curls slightly into the pillow, creates a sense of peace in the room, but also a sense of tension in him. The pull to reach out, to make sure you’re comfortable, is strong. But he hesitates, his mind racing with thoughts about boundaries, and the last thing he wants is to make you uncomfortable, especially when everything already feels so fragile between the two of you. He watches for a few more seconds, the quiet of the room making everything feel so... still. He doesn’t know how he got here, standing in the middle of the room, feeling so torn. Part of him wants to just go ahead and make sure you’re properly tucked in, like he did with Koji. But that other part of him continues to wonderf if that’s overstepping, if his presence, even now, feels intrusive. Satoru exhales slowly, rubbing the back of his neck. Finally, he decides to attempt to recreate his actions for Koji; it’s the least he can do.

He bends his knees slightly, hands reaching out. But just as his fingertips graze your bare arms, you’re jolting up and awake. Head swiveling around, eyes barely open and bleary. “What’s happening? Where’s Koji?”

Satoru freezes, his fingers hovering in the air as your voice cuts through the stillness. His eyes flick to you, wide and disoriented from the abruptness of your awakening. "Y/N?" He murmurs, his voice low and hesitant, almost as if he's unsure whether you’re fully awake. "Koji’s in the other room, he’s asleep."

You sit up, rubbing your eyes, still trying to shake off the remnants of sleep. Your thoughts are jumbled, disoriented from the deep slumber you’d just woken from. “I— I didn’t hear him... when did he go to bed?”

Satoru, still crouched by your bedside, lets out a soft sigh, his expression softening. "I put him down a few minutes ago. He was out before the movie ended." He pauses for a second, watching you carefully, his hand still lingering awkwardly in the air as if unsure whether to touch you or not. "You were really tired, so I thought I'd handle it."

You blink, the fog in your mind barely beginning to clear. Slowly, you nod, still trying to process everything in the haze of your exhaustion. “Thank you.” The words come out quieter than you expect, but there’s something in your voice that surprises both of you.

Satoru’s gaze lingers for a moment, a mix of concern and relief flashing in his eyes. He stands up, backing away from the bed slowly. “I didn’t want to wake you,” he says softly, hands running through his hair as he takes a step toward the door. “But you should go to bed. You can sleep with Koji or um—in my bed if you want.”

You stare at his figure, the weight of the situation still pressing down on you. There’s so much

happening, so much you didn’t expect, and yet… for some reason, having him here, like this, almost feels normal. You rub your temples, trying to stave off the headache forming.

“I’ll sleep out here, of course,” he quickly adds on, realizing the small, but accidental hinting.

You raise an eyebrow at his quick backpedaling, a small, almost reluctant smile tugging at the corner of your lips. It's been a long time since you shared any sort of space with him—especially under these circumstances. But the way he’s stumbling over his words, trying so hard to make things comfortable, it makes you wonder if maybe he’s not as composed as he likes to act. “Thanks,” you murmur, rubbing your temples again. The migraine's intensity is growing, and it's all you can do to keep your emotions in check. You hadn’t expected this—any of it. Satoru’s presence here, offering you comfort in his own odd way, only complicates everything more. You never asked for this kind of help, but you can't deny the relief it brings. “I’ll sleep with Koji.”

Satoru’s eyes linger on you for a moment longer, his expression softening as if he’s weighing his words carefully, trying not to overstep. He knows you’re not the type to ask for help. Hell, you hardly ever accept it when it’s offered. But tonight is different. Tonight is full of a thousand unspoken things. The lingering tension, the awkwardness of it all, and the confusing emotions between you two. It’s all too much, too quickly, and yet you feel the pull of something familiar—a bond you haven’t felt in years. “You sure?” he asks, his voice low. Almost like he’s waiting for you to give him some kind of permission or reassurance, something that lets him know you’re okay. His presence, his concern for Koji, it’s all so overwhelming in its own way.

You hesitate, swallowing the lump in your throat, trying to ignore the way your pulse quickens just having him this close, even if it is just in the same house. “I’ll be fine,” you say, your voice a little softer than you intended. The last thing you want to do is drag him back into your life fully. But he’s already here, and for the first time in what feels like forever, you're too tired to argue. "You don’t have to stay out here." The words hang in the air for a beat.

You take this moment to rise from the couch, wiping your eyes once more. “Where is he?”

“Spare room,” he points.

You nod, more to yourself than to him, and retreat to the spare room. The migraine pounds in the background of your mind. Mind still riddled with sleep, you accidentally bump your shoulder into the wall, footsteps faltering. He moves faster than you anticipated—expected, his hands finally making contact with your upper arms; stablizing you. His touch itself feels reminiscent.

His grip on your arms is steady, firm—just like it used to be. You catch your breath for a moment, not expecting the familiarity of his touch to feel so grounding. For a split second, you’re taken back to moments from the past, the memories of simpler days when his touch brought comfort instead of tension. You want to pull away, to remind yourself that things aren’t the same anymore. But you’re too tired, too worn out, and for a moment, you let yourself lean into the stability he’s offering without question.

"Careful," Satoru’s voice is quiet, but there's a soft edge to it, like he’s genuinely concerned. His hands stay on your arms, not pulling away immediately, as if waiting for you to give him a signal that you’re okay.

You blink, the haze of sleep making everything feel just a little more surreal. "I’m fine," you mutter, your voice barely above a whisper, but it lacks conviction. Your body feels heavier than it should, and your mind seems to be swimming in fog.

He doesn’t let go right away. Instead, his fingers give a slight squeeze, a small, unspoken reassurance. "You sure? You look like you’re about to fall over."

"I’m just... tired," you say, the words slipping from your lips before you even realize. You wince internally, but it’s too late to take them back now. There’s no point.

Satoru nods, his expression unreadable in the dim light of the hallway, but the way his eyes linger on you makes something in your chest tighten. It’s like he’s still trying to figure you out, still trying to read you after all these years. He always was good at that. Without saying much more, he gently guides you to the door of the spare room, a hand hovering above the small of your back; his touch still light but firm. He’s not pushing you, just there, a quiet presence in the storm. "Get some rest. I’ll be nearby, just in case."

You nod, feeling a strange mixture of gratitude and frustration well up inside you. "Thanks," you murmur, finally able to pull away from his grip and step into the room.

Before you close the door, you glance over at him, standing there in the hallway, his figure outlined by the soft glow from the living room. "Good night," you add, your voice a little softer than you meant it to be.

He doesn’t respond immediately, but there’s a flicker in his eyes that you can’t quite place. After a beat, he says quietly, "Good night, Y/N."

And then, with one last look, he walks away, leaving you alone in the quiet darkness of the room. The door clicks softly behind you, and for the first time in days, you feel a small sense of peace—fragile, uncertain, but there all the same.

Satoru has taken the liberty of getting Koji dressed and ready for school. Shushing his son with quiet murmurs so you won’t wake up. He’s a little surprised, but you must be that tired. Satoru usually wakes up earlier than most, having went to go check on you two, but getting shocked to see his son using the bathroom instead and saying something about how “Mama’s still sleeping, I have school.”

He’s a smart kid—a very smart kid. He guided Satoru the entire ride, remembering the name of his school and which streets to use. You raised him well. He parks his car in the lot, it stands out like a sore thumb among the civics, corollas, and trucks.

Carrying Koji in his arms towards the boys classroom. “Excited, buddy?”

“Mhm!”

Satoru smiles and kisses his cheek. “I’ll pick you up, okay?”

“Okay, Papa. Thank you.” Koji gratefully responds.

“No need to thank me, Koji. It’s my job.”

Satoru can feel the lingering stares and hushed whispers as he walks down the hallway to his son’s class. Ignoring it like a pro and focusing on one thing and one thing only. As they approach his room, Mr. Ito is standing outside like usual. As soon as the man sees the two, his eyes visibly widen before playing it off with a cough of his throat. “Good morning, Koji. Gojo.”

Satoru remembers the guy as the one from the cafe. That one. He nods in understanding, setting Koji down and crouching with him. “Have a fun day, I’ll see you later.”

“Bye, Papa.” Koji kisses his cheek and rushes inside happily.

"Morning," Satoru replies coolly, standing tall as he watches Koji run off to join his classmates. "I trust Koji’s been good?"

"Of course, of course," Mr. Ito replies quickly, his smile tight, the words coming out a little too fast. "He’s been a delight to have here. Very bright."

Satoru nods, but his eyes never leave Mr. Ito’s. "Glad to hear it."

There’s an awkward silence that stretches between them, but Satoru isn’t in the mood for small talk. He could read the teacher’s discomfort, and he’s not about to play into it. After all, it’s not like they’re friends, or even acquaintances. Mr. Ito shifts on his feet, and Satoru can tell he’s trying to think of something to say, something that will smooth over whatever awkwardness hangs in the air. “So, where’s Ms. Y/N today?”

Satoru’s brows tick, arms crossing. “At home.”

Mr. Ito nods, clearly trying to gauge whether there’s more to the story, but Satoru doesn’t give him any openings. He’s not in the mood to entertain questions about you, not now, not here, especially not from someone like him. "Ah, I see," Mr. Ito mumbles, his voice trailing off as he shuffles his feet again. "I just thought... well, with everything that’s been going on, I expected to see her here, too."

Satoru’s eyes narrow, though his expression remains calm, just a hint of warning in his tone. "She’s handling things on her own. We’re both doing fine. You don’t need to worry about it. You have a class full of children to teach."

The other man hides his displeasure behind a stiff nod. “Right, right. Just wondering, that’s all.”

“Don’t have to, she already has a man for that.”

Satoru wonders why he’s being do damn weird right now. Possesive almost. You two aren’t together, but the way this guy is asking about you, it’s slightly setting him off. Who does he think he is worrying about you?

Mr. Ito falters, his smile fading as Satoru’s words hang heavy in the air. "Right, of course," he mumbles, clearly taken aback. He shifts on his feet, his eyes darting to the ground before locking back onto Satoru. "Just asking, I mean… it's just a lot going on, you know?"

Satoru’s gaze hardens, the protective instinct that rises within him catching him off guard. He takes a slight step closer to Mr. Ito, his tone deliberately neutral but carrying an edge. "You don’t need to worry about her. She’s got it covered."

There’s a flicker of something in Mr. Ito’s eyes—something that hints he’s about to say something else, but he swallows it down, nodding stiffly instead. "Yeah, of course." He quickly looks away, clearing his throat. "Well, I guess I’ll… I’ll get back to the class."

Satoru stands still for a moment, his posture rigid, a sharp edge in his expression as he watches Mr. Ito retreat. He doesn't know why it bothered him so much. The guy wasn’t even doing anything wrong, not really. But the way he was asking about you—like he had any right to—made something inside Satoru twist uncomfortably. He couldn’t shake the feeling that this man didn’t belong in your world, that he had no place prying into your life.

Satoru finally exhales, shaking his head. Whatever. It was just a teacher.

With one last glance at the classroom door, he turns and heads back to the school doors. There's no reason to overthink this. It’s just… odd. He can’t let it get to him.

You wake up that day to a lone bed. Groaning to yourself as the sunbeams spray across your face and momentarily blind you. Hand reaching out for the space next to you. Instead, you see a note saying: dropped koji off, i’ll be back around noon to grab some lunch. sleep up

Instantly, your eyes widen, springing up out of bed. Reaching for your phone, the time reads 11:30pm. “Shit!” you curse to yourself, rushing out the door and to your bag still on the chair from last night. You dig in for your work clothes, changing right there and then and praying to the gods that Satoru doesn’t walk through this door. Brushing your teeth, hair, washing your face, putting some moustirzer and sunscreen on, all of it takes way too long. By the time you’re done and messily putting your shoes on, it’s twelve. Four hours after you were supposed to be at work. Hana’s going to kill me.

Grabbing your bag with rough and rushed movements, you’re sprinting to the door at this point. Out of breath and already conjuring up a sorry apology for Hana. you reach the doorhandle, flinging it open. But as soon as you do, you come to an abrupt stop.

Because standing before you is a woman, a woman you’ve seen before on Satoru’s lock screen. The same woman who kissed the lips that you used to. Arms crossed and a nasty scowl forming on her face as she eyes you up and down in a criticizing way.

Finally, she scoffs out.

“Do you know who I am?”

a/n: they so cute

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