#PLEEEEASE HEED THE WARNINGS
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Long term pharmacy tech here. Please please please heed @celestialyearning and her stellar advise.
IF YOU ARE ON PSYCH MEDS BE EXTRA CAREFUL!!!!!!! They really fuck with your bodyâs ability to handle heat and regulate temp. Pleeeease be careful and read your warning labels!
Drink water. Even when youâre not thirsty. Every 20 mins, drink some water. Even if youâre inside and not moving. Drink. If youâre sweating, drink sports drinks or make your own hydration drink as stated above. just FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HYDRATE!
Dont go to the beach. Stay inside if you can, especially during peak sun hours.

I need UK journalists to not show 43 ïżŒdegrees is not beach weather like people are gonna die
Americans do not interact
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Rapture

Oikawa Tooru x Reader (Haikyuu!!)
word count: 2.8k
TW: 18+, smut, incest, dub/noncon, mild somnophilia
A/N: I started writing this in my notes bcos I wanted to get out a cheeky Oikawa drabble for his birthday, didnât wanna commit to a proper fic bcos fuck knows Iâve been writing my first ever fic for over a month. Technically this is my first official fic I finished! So much love for my wife @blahkugo for listening to me sob and whine about this & beta-ing it, also to @lookslikeleese who created this brainchild of Tooru-nii with me.Â
rap·ture
/ËrapCHÉr/
a feeling of intense pleasure or joy.
(according to some millerian teaching) the transporting of believers to heaven at the Second Coming of Christ
Blood is thicker than water, in all forms and shapes and sizes. The guilt of blood lays thicker, sweaty and clammy, threatening to matte his perfectly coiffed hair. The guilt lies limp on his childhood bed, delicate legs dangling just a hair away from toeing the carpet.
You couldnât reach when you were younger, heâd always help you down with all the gentleness of a protective mother and its cub. Long slender fingers tucking under your armpits to lift you from his stiff mattress to stand you on the soft carpeting.
Guilt, in the form of his baby sister laying vulnerability-up, presenting to him in taunt, as if itâs a gift from Satan himself. You wonât know, will never know, It promises. Youâre out cold, too many cups of trashy house-party drinks in, your night was bound to end up like this one way or anotherâ exposed and defenseless in a manâs bed. You should be lucky itâs your own big brotherâs.
He curses himself for still having been awake when you called him at half four in the morning, curses himself for staying up studying tapes of his opposing team. Bad habits die hard. You were loopy, slurring your words, and all he could hear were the warm familiar sound of âniichan, niichanâ tinkling through the static. He had the keys clanking in his hands before he even registered the other voices across the line; deep, low, predatoryâ of men.
The drive there felt like a blur, tunnel visioning only on the number plate youâd sloppily sent him three times, each varying in one digit. It wasnât even the right address, it didnât match your location on his phone.
He saw crowds, loud bass reverberating through to his sleek car that stuck out like a sore thumb amidst the sea of beat-up sedans and trucks. He saw limbs, too many limbs, entangling together in a frenzy of sweat and lust; limbs on curves and humps of silhouettes, limbs on your small frame leaning into the corner of the dimly lit room. Then he saw red.
He couldnât hear the shouts and hollers of his name, crazed fangirls pawing at him for an autograph, a picture, any type of affection from The Oikawa Tooru himself, international volleyball superstar with too many sponsorships under his belt. He reached out an arm towards you, and you clung to him like a magnetic pull, whole body suctioning onto his and tittering out a string of âniichan came to pick me upâ and a fit of giggles.
His first conscious breath was taken once he got you in his car. He didnât want to look at you, didnât want to assess the damages lest he drove his car straight into the dastardly party if he saw any hint of protrusion. He didnât; you were fine. You seemed fine, too. You were all-too happy to see him, bragged to him âI bet them that you would come pick me up if I called you.â
You told him you missed him, âmissed niichan so much, he never even bothered to call when he came back to Japanâ. Tooru sighed, half part relief, half part guilt. He told you he couldnât bring you back to his hotel, had to bring you home, because imagine the scandal if he got papped.
It was a lie, he couldnât give a damn if he got papped, he could easily have explained that it was his own sister; he couldnât give himself up to the safety of his own enclosed room. His room with no security net of Mum and Dad threatening to barge in, his room where he was free to do whatever he wanted.
He drove you home.
You begged him to pick you up and carry you upstairs, because your feet hurt, theyâre so sore from dancing all night. He complied, using all his decade-molded muscles to pull you into his chest and his heart sank to his gut at the realization that you weighed like nothing to him; just like you had when you were younger.
You were bigger now, grown, an adult, but he had grown all the same. It was like a cruel jokeâ no matter how much you grew, heâd parallel your growth so he would always be just that much stronger than you, that much bigger. The perfect size to protect you. The perfect size to hurt you.
He was directed to his own room rather than yours, with the excuse that yours was too close to the master bedroom, too risky to wake your parents up. His feet moved before his mind could stop him, muscle memory bringing him to the space heâs barely stepped foot in since he was eighteen.
It was too familiar, whole body transcending back to his childhood, back to the innocence of your relationship before heâs tainted it with his twisted perversions. His arms laid you down on his bed, hands finding the straps of your heels to pick off before you thumped back onto his bed, sprawled out and fast asleep.
Heâs been staring at your vulnerable placid silhouette splayed on his bed for what feels like minutes, hours. He canât bring himself to tuck you in, canât trust his limbs to function how he instructs them to. His skin crawls at the gust of wind kissing the sweat embalming his body, but he doesnât let himself strip off the suffocating layers. He wants to bask in the physical manifestation of his disgust, nausea, let it remind him of his twisted perversions he can never, ever indulge in.
You shiver, and he jumps. Your tiny body is quivering in chills, begging him to warm it up. He moves with the grace and caution of a robber on the prowl for an expensive jewel, gently snaking his arms under the crook of your knee and top of your spine, lifting you up and away from him like heâs terrifiedâ disgusted, by you.
He lifts the covers and daintily drapes it over the small rise and fall of your chest, pinching the top with only two fingers. A deep breath, a moan, a soft âniichanâ, and he thinks his heart has stopped completely.
Heâs frozen, the hammering in his chest arguing that no, heâs still very much alive, and spares a glance down at you. Your eyelids are fluttering, lips softly pouting, and unmistakably still asleep. Heâs mid sigh of relief when he feels a small hand wrap around his arm, and for the second time that night he thinks heâs died.
All the gravity weighing him down disappears as he lets himself be tugged down onto the bed, the weight of his body crushing your tiny one, but he canât bring himself to move. Heâs too scared, heâs horrified.
He can feel two dainty arms loop around his neck and cage his head into the side of your face. He can feel the palpitations in his chest, heart hammering straight into yours, tangling with your soft cadenced beats, reaching in and provoking it to waltz to the same fatal rhythm. He can feel his trousers strain and his blood run cold.
Deep breaths to the count of the tick and tocking of the clock on the wall. He feels blurry, vision blotchy, skin prickling with every flood of blood traveling south. He wills it to stop, begs for it to spare him, heâll behave, heâll never let his mind wonder to you ever again, he promises.
God is all merciful, but God has long given up on him. Satan wants to watch his world burn, collapse, and dance in the ashes of his crumbling dignity. It teases him with the hilt of your soft body moving to press into his, crawling into his arms caging you in, willfully entering the den holding a ravenous lion fighting its own fangs.
Your eyes flutter open, gaze finding his with striking precision, and smile. Itâs the same smile youâve given him his whole life, the trust and love carved into every quirk of the lip. It shatters his dignity, stomps on it with childish fervor, and Tooru chokes on the breath coming out.
He feels you nuzzling closer, can feel your hair tickling his chin, and prays for forgiveness to any God willing to listen. None doâ heâs too far gone. His handâs reaching to cradle the back of your head as he plants the softest kiss on your cheek with all the practiced grace of a man begging for salvation.
Your eyes stare straight into his with undeterred conviction, glazed over with equal parts alcoholic daze and pure, unadulterated adoration. Thereâs not enough oxygen traveling to his brain to justify his actions, no amount of repentance would excuse his sins. His lips press into yours, so gently it feels like a mere ghost of breath, quivering in prayers for forgiveness.
A shift; small warm body squirming under his arms, shuffling closer. It catches the tent between his legs, and his whole body twitches like itâs been stung. He barely chokes down the whimper that threatens to come out.
He can feel your hands locking behind his hair, pulling your body infinitely closer to his, smushing your soft tits into his hard chest as he feels the breath sucked out of him by the Devil himself. Thereâs no more feigned chastity, all abstinence launched aside as he feels a little tongue prod at his lips. They open to let yours in, sucking on it as if itâll bring his very breath back.
He doesnât let himself wonder if itâs okay, he knows itâs not; itâs wrong, so wrong, on so many levels. Heâs given up trying to please a Holy deity, Satan can take him whole if it means he can ravish in his sick twisted fantasies. He slots a leg between yours, letting the two pairs tangle and waltz to the symphony of your matching heartbeats, finally synching in a virulent tempo.
Breaths turn to pants, turn to unmistakable moans, and Tooru has to pull back to clamp a hand over your mouth in warning. The imagery of his long slender fingers covering more than half your face sends jolts down his body at the same time he realizes itâs him whining out so desperately.
He looks back at your face, beady, glassy, needy eyes peering back at him in sheer devotion, and he shuts his eyes in pure agony as his heart clenches in pangs of guilt, while his adulterous cock twitches in revelation. The warm soft breaths fan his palm, lips puckering underneath to peck softly at his fingers in hopes of escape; he thinks he might cum untouched.
His hand yanks back in shock, in horror, in disgust. But your hands clasped firmly behind hair pulls him back in, and he whispers out a prayer before a soft, âWe canât.â His eyes bore into yours, begging for mercy, begging you to let him go so he can suffer for his sins.
You donât respond, not immediately. He feels his face pulled into yours and a distinct moisture building up on his thigh wedged between your much smaller legs. Wetâ the suction on his tongue, the grinding on his leg, everythingâs wet, and damp, and he thinks his mind might be drowning.
He can hear whines, pitched in desperation, and heâs certain theyâre from you this time. His arm moves to grip at your hips, cupping your supple mound to shift it up the sheets and press your cunny against his straining erection. His hips buck on instinct, grazing the drooling slit covered only by a thin piece of cotton.
His mind goes blank, vision patching, and itâs too fast, too much, âplease, Tooru-niiââ heâs crying. Thereâs tears stinging the corners of his eyes while he chokes out a string of âno, no, noâ. He canât slow the erratic humps against his lil sisterâs cunt, the fingers digging into your hips marking you with patches of blooming purple and green, âI love you, niichanâ.
Itâs a knee-jerk reaction; he yanks his body back, takes sharp inhales of breath, until he can open his eyes to look at you again. Panic and nausea coat his tongue where it once tasted like you, but heâs met with the same look of pure adoration you gave him before he tainted your body with sin.
He realizes your hands are still straining to reach the back of his neck where they were before he wrenched his body away. Theyâre laying gently on his shoulders, twirling lazily at the strands of his hair curling around the base. Tears are flowing down his cheeks, or maybe itâs one single continuous tear, and his body is wracked with guilty desperation.
Thereâs no malice in your expression, no accusatory anger, and most of all, no disgust. Your face is painted with bliss, and joy, and loveâ Tooru snaps.
Heâs pushing your shoulders back until they meet his singular pillow, and crawls down to nest in the space between your thighs. Large palms hook under your knees and push back until they touch your shoulders, and he moans when he sees your arms reach out to hook them in place obediently.
He wants to cherish this moment, burn the image into his brain for years to come, however many heâs spared, but his loins burn with years of yearning. He grants himself one glance at your tiny frame spread open for him, revels in the sheer devotion in your eyes, and plunges his face into the drenched cotton covering your core.
You moan out his name in a wanton reaction as he inhales your sweet toxins like heâs trying to drownâ he is, he has no reason to live past this moment he sins, no right to live as he indulges in his sick perversions.
He can feel each shake and tremor of your thighs above his head as he sucks and licks at the soaked cotton, rendered nothing but an useless scrap now. Each suck is paired with a deep whine, echoing through his now-barren room. With one swift move he pulls off your panties and let it dangle between your ankles hanging above your bodies. Slick lines drip from the wet rag, stretching to connect back to your drooling pussy.
Five secondsâ thatâs how long he allows himself to marvel at your leaking slit, lips pink and puckered around the clenching hole. His cockhead drenches through his pants, so painfully hard a soft breath could send him tumbling over.
But he doesnât allow himself to touch it, itâs not about him; itâs about you. Your devotion, mercyâ your sheer, unadulterated, unwavering love for him. Itâs about you; you deserve the best, you deserve it all, you deserve someone thatâs not him.
He licks up, tongue flat, and slowly follows the dip between your folds until he suctions onto your swollen bud. His lips give it a soft peck, before wrapping around it and enclosing it in the hot heat of his mouth.
He has half a mind to snake his hand up to clamp over your mouth, stop the loud moans and sobs from coming out, but each wail shoots jolts of arousal straight to his leaking dick; he canât bring himself to shut it down, despite how good you look with his long fingers wrapped around your face.
With every long lap, he pulls more cries out of you, and by the time he prods his tongue into your needy hole, youâre clenching down on him, sucking back on the muscle. Youâre close, he can feel it. His tongue fucks into you without any of the mercy youâve graced him, hips rutting into the bedsheet in tangent to your growing squeals.
The palpitations hammering in his heart synchronizes with the pulse of your cunt, weaving into a fatal rondo before everything stops; his hips, your cries, the air closes in on your writhing bodies as he paints his pants in shame and sin.
He allows his peripherals to roam your body; thighs indented with tiny crescents by your dainty fingers, mouth agape with your cute pink tongue lolling outâ he swallows down his guilt, letting it scorch his insides before coating his cock threatening to twitch back to life.
He watches your hands drop down from their determined grip, thumping lightly as they hit his bed. He gingerly folds your legs back onto the flat surface before dipping down to place a gentle kiss on your forehead. He can feel your arms shake in attempt to reach out and cuddle him in, but give out to fatigue.
Your eyes flutter closed, lips molding back to that soft smile ever-present in his presence, and he thinks he hears a faint whisper of, âI love you, Tooru-nii.â
Placid, limp, he watches as your body loses energy and drains into the mattress below. It slaps him in the face, presents him with a trophy, a golden star stamped with a big fat âSinâ calligraphed on. His world collapses around him, buries him in the debris of his crumbled dignity, and the Devil dances.
#tw: incest#tw: dubcon#tw: noncon#oikawa tooru x reader#oikawa x reade#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu smut#oikawa tooru#tw: somnophilia#sorry for the super super long authors note!!#i promise it wont be that long ever again oopsies#I JUST#HAVE A LOT OF EMOTIONS!!#PLEEEEASE HEED THE WARNINGS#P L E A S E#IVE TAGGED IT#ANYTHING I NEED TO TAG#SO#PLEASE#READ THE WARNINGS AND DECIDE WHETHER OR NOT IT WILL UPSET YOU#THANK U!!!#but!!! also on a side note:#If you feel like Iâve missed a tag; PLEAAASS message me!#Iâm not the greatest at tagging warnings but I think I cover the main ones rhat I can think of#PLEASE message me if Iâve forgotten any; Iâll be forever thankful <33#oikawa#baka no sakubun
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*Please heed warnings at the beginning of each fic*
Key- đsmut, đ„angst, đfluff, đȘdark, đ§žA/B/O, đșhybrid!reader, S (series), MS (mini series), R (requests)
âłIncorrect quotes
âââBucky Barnesâââ
âââEddie Brockâââ
âââLoki Laufeysonâââ
âââPeter Parkerâââ
âââSam Wilsonâââ
âââSteve Rogersâââ
âââThor Odinsonâââ
âââTony Starkâââ
âââAlex Summersâââ
Just Shut Up and Playđ
All you want to do after a long day of classes is snuggle with your gaming obsessed boyfriend. Female reader. College!AU
âââBruce Bannerâââ
Green Eyes and Red Hot BloodđR
Just a good dose of jealous Bruce and horny Tony. Female reader
The Way It Will BeđR
You and Bruce want a family. Female reader
WatchingđR
Bruce likes proving that even if you find others attractive, they will never own your cunt the way that he does. Female reader
âââCharles Xavierâââ
Lost And Foundđ„R
When the world learned of the existence of mutants after the incident in Cuba, you thought you had lost your family forever but youâve been wrong before. Female reader
âââJohnny Stormâââ
Just PerfectđR
First dates are never perfect but maybe this one could be. Female reader
On FiređR
Johnny is ok at being a hero, heâs good at extreme sports and heâs a god at sex, but feelings- he canât do those. Female reader
âââLogan Howlettâââ
Sunshine and Flowersđđ„
Logan has had a great many loves in his long life and heâs over it. He doesnât want to lose anyone else yet somehow, the annoying and very much younger art teacher at Xavierâs School for Gifted Youngsters, wormed her way into his heart. Female reader
The Way Back Homeđ
After months of being apart from each other, heâs finally back in your arms. Female reader
Worst Possible Decisionđ„R
How could Logan be stupid enough to fall for the little sister of an overprotective metal controlling mutant? As it turns out, very easily. Female reader
âââMatt Murdockâââ
Give Him A ChanceđR
Matt is in love with Peterâs girlfriend and Peter knows. Female reader
Lipstick Stains On His Heartđ
You love kissing Matt, itâs your favourite pastime but others donât appreciate it, especially when you wear your favourite red lipstick. Female reader
âââMoon Knightâââ
Dear ProfessorđR
When Steven finally gets a job as a tour guide for the British Museum, you decide you need to celebrate him. Female reader
Moon And The Starsđ„R
Marc always believed that you loved him because you loved Steven and itâs time to prove him wrong. GN reader
âââNatasha Romanoffâââ
Mommy, Sorry, Mommyđ
Sleep deprivation and a very attractive assassin do not mix. Female reader
âââPietro Maximoffâââ
Musketeer And The CowboyđR
Halloween brings out the worst in all of us. Female reader
Walking Vibratorđ
After months of pining for each other, the two youngers Avengers give into their urges, much to the Avengerâs chagrin. Female reader
âââPlatonicâââ
Pretty Highđ
Reader gets wisdom teeth removed and mistakes Bucky for Jesus, based off a TikTok. GN reader
Can We Keep Him Pleeeease?đ
The youngest super soldier brings home an unusual pet. GN reader
âââScott Langâââ
Biggerđ
They have always said bigger is better and by god they were right. Female reader
âââWade Wilsonâââ
Merc With A MouthđR
Thereâs only one way to get Wade to shut up and it involves your own mouth. Female reader
Taco TuesdaysđR
Tuesdays are date nights in the Wilson household and nothing is going to get in the way of Wade and his Mexican food and his woman. Female reader
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Ch. 1 - The Party's Just Beginning. - "Bard. You get one sip as Dorwinion wine will knock you on your ass."
"But I want more King Thranduil. I am the captain of the archers. Strong and resilient like my beautiful bow."
"I am sure you are. But....."
"But...pleeeease?" Bard says with puppy eyes. Thranduil hates puppy eyes and gives in.
"Bard no. Do not do it. You will feel weird tingling in your fingers and see little hobbit folk." Legolas warns.
Bard does not heed the Prince's warning and takes another sip. "My Lord Thranduil. Look. I am dancing with a hobbit named Bilbo." Thranduil laughs as there is no one there and feels quite embarrassed.
Gandalf watched the madness before his eyes and decided he wanted some madness too. "Thranduil, this is madness! Why have you not offered me any of this magical fruity liquid?"
""If you even breathe it, it will stop your ticker where you stand. You can clearly see what it has done to the young bowman." Thranduil replied.
"With that said..." The Elvenking continued to Gandalf the Grey.
It then appeared that the King of Mirkwood also had a bit too much magical juice. "Look what it has done to you as well Thranduil." Gandalf chuckled.
Gandalf snuck a glass as the King turned away after his bickering. Thranduil was right. The smell alone made the wizard all up in his feels and could not even drink it.
Thranduil saw what he did and was pissed.
He took Gandalf's glass and said...."You started this Mithrandir, you will forgive me if I finish it..."
and then the three drunken musketeers all went outside and just stared at the world while Gandalf babbled. The end...
youtube
I WAS BORED OK??? lol.
More snark-tales coming on my new blog Snark-tales of the Elvenking come follow!!
#lee pace#luke evans#ian mckellen#thranduil#bard the bowman#gandalf#the hobbit#legolas#orlando bloom#dorwinion wine#elves love wine#thranduil loves wine#hobbit memes#thranduil memes#thrandy#the party's just beginning#thranduil snarks#snark tales of the elvenking#wine and thrandy#Youtube
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One Word Prompt: Fish
Title: Scaled and Icy
Pairing: Platonic, familial Logince
Summary:Â âOh, Virgil is going to hate him. Heâs going to erupt in a rant about Logan being too impulsive as if Logan doesn't think out every action in a methodical manner.â Or. Logan decides to adopt an abandoned human child.Â
Word-Count: 1k
Warnings: Dubious Morally Grey Logan, Merfolk But Theyâre Like Fae!, Presumed Child Abandonment, Slightly Unreliable Narrator, Transformation, Emotional Manipulation, Mentioned Cannibalism (Kinda), Angst With a Kinda Happy Ending, Donât Worry Romanâs fine, Probably, Itâs Dark Fairytale Vibes Okay
Here, have another eldritch logan adopts a child au!Â
-
"You're like a fish!" The human child crows, his brown eyes alit with both wonder and joy. He couldn't be much older than three, possibly four. Which is all the more concerning, really, for where is his parents?
Logan blinks. "Not entirely but yes, I do share similar characteristics to them."
"Fish, fishy, fish-man!" The child declares, pudgy fingers reaching to touch Logan's bioluminescent blue scales.
"A-aahah--" Logan begins, moving slightly back, "Please refrain from touching people without asking their permission first."
He tilts his head, golden brown locks falling over his eyes. "Pleeeease can I?"
"Of course, thank you for asking."
The human child's face brightens at this. He reaches again, this time delicately touching Logan's scales with care.
"Whoa," The human child breathes in, "It'ssocool."
He then draws the hand away, resting it against the sandy shore. "My name is Roman and I wanna be a prince! What's your name?"
"You may call me Logic," Logan smiles, showing a slip of his sharp needle-like teeth. There's several rows of them unlike a humanâs set of teeth.
This terrifies most humans, but not Roman who possesses the boundless courage of childhood. He leans closer, face scrunching up.
"Logic's a silly name." He declares.
Logan laughs, "Well good thing it's not my true name."
"It's a pretend name? Like make-believe?"
"Essentially, yes. You shouldn't give names away, they have power."
Roman doesn't seem to heed Logan's words, instead protesting, "Well, then, I wanna be Prince Romanul-us-ulus--Romulus then!"
Logan lets out a low, crooning noise, one generally meant to console young merlings. He never expected himself to so enchanted with a child, let alone a human one. Yet the instinctual parental drive is stronger than he thought.
"Well, Roman, would you like to be a prince?" Oh, Virgil is going to hate him. Heâs going to erupt in a rant about Logan being too impulsive as if Logan doesn't think out every action in a methodical manner.
"Well, yeah!" Because Roman needs someone to look after him. His parents are clearly not doing a great job of it. He could've gotten swept up in the waves and died if not for Logan.
"Take my hand, come with me then, Roman." This is something the Ocean surely wills. She offered Roman to Logan and he must honor that.
"Okay!" Roman says, eagerly taking Logan's webbed hand.
And it's all Logan needs to pull the child underneath the water, wrapping his arms tightly before Roman can squirm away. Oh, how the child thrashes, his human instincts kicking in and trying to get him to go towards the surface.
It's alright though, it won't last long. Logan sings, thanking the Ocean for Roman. He won't beg for the Ocean to be merciful because the Ocean is not merciful. The Ocean will either let Roman live or She won't. It's something humans seem to fail to understand, time and time again, as they try their hardest to thwart Her will with their contraptions.
Soon Roman's thrashes go weak and the child is limp, heavy in his arms. Logan hums, rocking the child gently back and forth. His grin widens at the slits forming on the child's neck, acting as the opening for gills.
It's the only warning he receives as Roman's eyes reopen, a fiery red hue, as a piercing wail escapes his lips. The childâs soft, rounded baby teeth fall out as little rows of new merling teeth replace them. Still not full-grown teeth, but better at tearing through raw fish than a humanâs dull teeth ever could.
"I know, I know," Logan croons, stroking his golden brown locks, "It'll be over soon."
Roman is not the first human Logan has seen the Ocean take as Her own. Virgil was one of the first Logan witnessed. Heâd fallen overboard off a human ship, too young to know how to swim. Loganâs pod circled around his sinking figure, tails whipping with fervent excitement.
âHeâs an offering from the Ocean,â Loganâs father had whispered to him, âEither heâs meant to become one of the Oceanâs children or heâll perish and weâll feast on his flesh.â
Virgil survived, snapping and clicking with the ferocity of a bullshark. Logan has an inkling Roman will be the same as his wails become more of a hissing, shrill noise.Â
His ears has elongated, tipped with small winged fins. Similar fins appear on the backside of his elbows and Logan suspects on his back as well. The most important part, of course, is when the humanâs pair of tails conjoin together to become one. This is where many prove their unworthiness to be one of the Oceanâs own. They perish, a mockery of what a Mer should be; malformed and incomplete, a disgrace to the Ocean.
âShhh, shhh, Roman, let the Ocean accept you as one of Her own, donât fight it,â Logan continues crooning, adjusting his grip so he is only holding onto the upper half of Romanâs body. The sliver of Romanâs soul that is still human tries to use this to kick at Logan, to dislodge his grasp.Â
But this is hard when the tails become stiff, rigid as they become one, shimmering as ruby scales overtake soft flesh. The outerwear humans are fond of wearing tears, ripping to shreds as its unable to handle Romanâs growing unified tail. The tail itself almost makes up his original height but not quite. Romanâs tail twitches once, then several times.
âRather an odd sensation for you I imagine, hmm?â Logan comments, tracing the edge of Romanâs finned ear fondly. Oh thank the Ocean, he never thought heâd be happy to have a child of his own until this moment.
Roman opens his eyes again, a good proper glowing red hue. âF-fishyman--Logic?â
âYes?â
âI--Iâm a fish too?â
âNo, Roman, youâre not a fish. Youâre like me--youâre one of the Oceanâs children now.â
âO-ooh. But why? It hurt so much!â Roman pouts, tail lashing angrily.
âThatâs simply how it is, little prince,â Logan hums.
âWell, I donât like it! Can I change back? I wanna see my mom and dad.â
âNow, Roman, you canât do that. Your parents left you, they werenât watching you like they should and now I will take care of you. You want to be a prince now, donât you, Roman? Roman, you will be a prince and youâll be so excited youâll forget those humans ever existed, alright?â
Foolish, foolish humans. They really shouldâve taught their child about the importance of names. Thatâs alright, Logan will teach Roman now and keep him safe.
âI do wanna be a prince, Iâm going to be a prince, right?â Roman murmurs, yawning. The process of becoming one of the Oceanâs own is a tiring one. He snuggles closer to Logan, curling his tail around Logan. Something Mer instinctively do, to ensure they wonât drift away from their loved ones when they fall asleep. Logan smiles at this.
âYes of course,â Logan soothes, âYouâll be my little prince and I wonât ever let any harm come to you.âÂ
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Feeling Deeply Chapter 5
Genre: Arranged Marriage Fic. Fluff turning into angst?
Pairing: Namjoon x OC
Summary: The story of two deeply feeling nerds who find themselves in an arranged marriage. (Details here). Our OC is called Brishti. Itâs a Bengali name meaning rain. Namjoon calls her Rim (short for her pet name, RimJhim which means the pitter-patter of rain). She calls him Joon.
Warnings: NOT THE NAMJOON OF OUR DREAMS. Argument. Fight over tiny discrepancies that turn out to be a huge problem. Domestic violence. Not a happy chapter.
A/N: Have you ever felt this, reader? When you watch something and realise exactly what you need to realise in that moment? Iâve had that so many times - seeing my feelings mirrored in a show. Thatâs something that Iâve tried to have Brishti feel here. Also, this is how I see the natural progression of this Namjoon, the one who obliged to duty rather than his dreams. It took me a long time to write this but I love whatâs come out. Let me know what you think!
Current Chapter: London, late 1963. Love fully blooms between Namjoon and Brishti. And yet, somethingâs not right. A visit to the ballet and a conversation brings forth realisations. The inklings that Brishti was trying to avoid transform into writing on the wall.
Previously in Feeling Deeply: Preface Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4
Chapter 5
The magic about new love isnât really in romance or even in true intimacy. Itâs in how violent new love is⊠and just how much time it takes us to feel itâs impact.
In the new love between Namjoon and Brishti, everything had been roses and honey, overflowing, swaying in a gentle breeze. They spent every second possible in each otherâs arms. They had to tear themselves away from each other when they had to leave home. And even then, it hurt as though they were part of the same cloth.
Brishti had thought about how they had become woven, their souls an ornate tapestry. Namjoon had told her then about a Japanese tradition of weaving that was a sort of meditation and a kind of worship to a god called âMusubiâ. The disciples say it is like being part of the cosmic tapestry. Being tied to each other.
âJust like we are⊠I felt a pull toward you and I followed it. I was scared⊠so full of doubts about who you were and how this was all going to go⊠I had promised myself that I would fulfil my duty⊠whatever happened â Namjoon had said, petting Brishtiâs hand gently, âAnd I⊠I still canât believe it⊠It⊠you make me feel like I can⊠trust myself.â Brishti had looked at her genius then and wondered what a strange world it must be that made a man like Namjoon doubt himself, âAlways, always trust yourself, Namjoon-ah.â and settled into the crook of his neck.
It was indeed a strange world that caused Namjoon to build an armour around himself. Because âLondonâ and âLonelyâ sounded just the same to him. His years alone in this strange place had been unkind, unrelenting. Brishti had been the only softness he had felt in a long long time. Armours built over years can break in an instant, though. For him, it was the moment when he and his wife had crossed the threshold to becoming lovers. High on the magic of new love, he had not realised it.
Sitting across from each other after that fateful evening, Namjoon and Brishti were both wide awake in the early hours of the next morning. Brishti buttoned up the shirt they never fully took off. Namjoon had tickled her with his toes. They propped their feet against the otherâs to see just how vast the difference was (he melted seeing how small her feet were and hadnât stopped playing with them since). Caressing each toe, he remembered something he wanted to ask -
âHow did you know what Saranghae is?â
âMmâŠâ she stretched her arms, âI know what it meansâŠâ Brishti said.
âI know you know⊠from the way you⊠after I said it⊠You asked Yoongi about it?â Namjoon cautiously asked about the only other Korean Brishti knew. To his surprise, she nodded no, still denying him any information. Namjoon had to tickle her foot for the answer.
âOkay! Okay! Wait! Pleeeease!â Namjoon stopped and Brishti bent down to the bureau next to her bed and pulled out a textbook - LEARN HANGUL THROUGH ENGLISH. Namjoon looked more shocked than she had expected. âI asked Yoongi about the book-â
âYou donât need to Rim⊠Iâm not learning Bangla, am I?â Namjoon said. He was touched but he didnât want his love to do anything he couldnât reciprocate.
âI would have asked you to learn it⊠if I wrote poetry in my mothertongue...â Brishti said. Namjoon was shocked. She went on, âYou really think I didnât know?â
Namjoon blushed and smiled and flopped over in Brishtiâs lap. She brushed his hair as she explained, âYou light up at the mention of lyrics and poetry, you keep a notebook by your side at all times, youâre moved by the things that people usually donât pay attention to⊠I know youâre a poet, Joonie.â
Namjoon looked up at her and said, âNo one has ever called me thatâŠâ
Brishti leaned down and kissed her gorgeous husband. âYou are... From what I know, I bet all my books that you are a great one... And⊠I⊠I would love nothing more than to be part of your world of words, Joonie⊠It must be strange⊠to be understood but in a foreign language. If you would let me, I want to understand you in your language⊠Do you think thatâs something maybe--â
He got up and all but jumped on Brishti, pinning her down to the bed with the cutest puppy-yell she had ever heard. âYes! Of course, yes!â
They both understood that this was a proposal. The truest kind - a gentle request to explore Namjoonâs universe. They would later joke about how she proposed to him after a month of being married. Namjoon was completely delighted by this person with him, his person⊠one who really saw him.
He pulled her to him saying, âYouâre the best part of my world, Rim...â and kissed her.
Each moment of love flowed through the next. When they had to be separated, they couldnât wait for the next one, their moment again. On weekends they would visit museums and find their favourite paintings and sculpture or their favourite prehistoric relic and animal. Brishti hated the fact that Namjoon had to work overtime to compensate for these weekends and she often voiced how unfair it was.
In response Namjoon would just give her a peck and say, âAs long as I have you, Iâm happy.â This pricked her but she was too taken by the man before her to pay heed to it.
Namjoon was just about able to keep a straight face at work but everyone around Brishti was acutely aware of how much she loved Namjoon.
At one point, her colleague and best friend, Min Yoongi had yelled at her, âYhaaaaa! Stop blushing?! Itâs just a clock⊠what could be romantic about a clock?!â Sayuri-san, and she were hanging around Yoongiâs table when Brishti looked at his new flip clock and started blushing.
Brishti laughed along with everyone else but explained, âItâs involuntary⊠thatâs what happens when youâre married to a poet.â
Sayuri-san corrected, âI know too many wives of poets to know thatâs not necessarily true⊠It is true though, when youâre in love with a poet⊠Go on⊠tell us how exactly poet Namjoon makes you blush about a clock...â
Brishti blushed even more at that. Yoongi rubbed his arms and demanded, âTell us because thereâs some really weird things coming to my mind⊠like you guys have an exact time when...â
Brishti stopped his imagination, âNo no no⊠itâs nothing like that⊠he loves digital clocks... because he loves to watch the time turn to 00:00⊠zero oâclock he calls it⊠and on days he feels sad, itâs like zero oâclock is always there to comfort him⊠like itâs a point when the whole world holds its breath and he can feel happy again⊠but these days⊠with me⊠he said he wants the clock to keep going after 23:59⊠he wishes time would stretch on⊠beyond 24:01âŠâ
Yoongi sighed and sat back down, âYouâre making me fall in love with Namjoon⊠ahhh that is beautiful. He should be published...â
âImagine him saying this directly to you and you might know how I feel⊠I canât stop talking about him...â
âOh, we know. But honestly none of us care⊠your poet-librarian romance is getting us through our single-ness.â Yoongi reassured her.
The three of them continued to talk about the ways in which Brishti could repay Namjoonâs wordsmithing in graphic ways.
It was that evening, wasnât it, when Namjoon had enveloped her back in the warmest hug as soon as heâd entered their flat. Brishti was in the kitchen when she heard him enter but hadnât expected this. He kissed her neck while telling her the good news, âWe got our first Korean client today⊠because of me⊠Mmmm⊠Why do you always smell so amazing?â
Brishti turned around and hugged him again, âThatâs amazing! Namjoon-ssi! Iâm so proud of you!â
âHeâs from a wealthy family⊠so he can actually afford our firm⊠its not exactly the work I wanted to do--â
âIt is a step toward that idea, right? Itâs still good work, fighting for justice?â Brishti asked, stopping him from undermining his own work.
Namjoon nodded, âYeah⊠Heâs a dancer⊠Park Jimin. All the posh types know him as one of the best dancers in the Royal Ballet. They call him Jim⊠as if itâs too difficult to say Jimin?â Namjoon shook his head in disapproval. He began helping Brishti with the chopping and continued, âHe was born in the UK and trained since he was 5... He got into the Royal Ballet but heâs been passed up to be a principal over and over even though everyone who has seen him dance apparently knows that heâs far far better⊠So recently he spoke to the director there... and of course the director made a racist slur and asked not to bother him with this again. He canât even quit and work at another company because of the contract they have him on. Thereâs a non compete clause⊠meaning he wonât be able to dance with any other company. Thatâs all he wants⊠to be able to get out of that contract⊠Iâm hoping to convince him to press charges on racial discrimination too. Weâre not in the 20s anymore.â
When Brishti didnât respond, Namjoon looked up at her. âThatâs horrible⊠Iâm so so glad youâre taking up the case. But please tell me what you ate when you were alone?â He looked down at the carrot heâd been failing to cut.
Namjoon scrunched his nose and admitted, âCanned food mostly.â
Brishti said, âIâm really really glad youâre getting to do work that you are passionate about, Joonie, you deserve it. Now, you should know how to cut a carrot.â
Namjoon pressed up against Brishtiâs back. She reached back up to the nape of his neck and made him moan into her. Then⊠then Namjoon made her forget how to cut carrots.
He had these ways⊠Namjoon, with his touch, his voice, his languages both spoken and soundless. He was lighting new paths into her self. She loved learning him. Paths she didnât know existed, that sheâd been longing for.
The scars of the loneliness, emptiness that Namjoon had experienced had turned his longings into a kind of starvation. He needed to be nourished and also devoured. Brishti was just the creature to do it. He could feel her warm fingers trace rows of pleasure onto his skin. He felt them bear down and singe when the two of them had to move away from each other. He felt those ropes tug at him as the end of his workday neared. Namjoon closed his eyes each night at her touch, the feeling and fragrance of her body. He felt blooms of intimacy spring up like seedlings out of the soil of his skin. And deeper. In the earth of his soul. So he did the only thing he could. Reciprocate. Namjoon sowed his love, his desire, his need onto her, into her every night.
There were times, though, when she would feel his absence in the middle of the night and see him working in the dim light of a lamp. She knew he had to work hard to do what he wanted but she also saw he had to continually prove himself to people who werenât even paying attention. The reason they werenât paying attention was painfully clear to Brishti but she was yet to experience itâs full stab.
Namjoon wanted to shield her from it. He was counting on an armour that didnât exist anymore to protect himself and his wife⊠the reason he liked his life again. Whenever she came out and switched on a brighter light, reprimanding him for straining his gorgeous eyes, he saw that it did prick her - this world and the unfairness he had to endure. She would say something small, an almost-complaint that alerted him⊠against her for some strange reason. She would say something that would be easy to ignore and yet would prick him, like - âI donât know why they havenât promoted you yet.â or âWhy havenât they taken up Jiminâs case yet? Youâve worked so hard on it.â Everytime she did that, he would have to pacify himself.
âIâve told her so much about the Jimin case⊠sheâs just really investedâ Namjoon thought to himself. Just so he would avoid thinking, âI shouldnât have told her.â
He would have to calm himself, give her a peck and try to convince her to stop worrying. âAs long as I have you, Iâm happy.â Namjoon would always say.
Then, Brishti smiled as she always did. While trying to understand why that sentence bothered her so much. After almost five months of exploring this wonderful man, some part of him still felt unfamiliar⊠like it didnât fit in with the rest. Still, these things take time, she had heard from so many women over the years. Besides, she was blessed with a man far far above the norms. So, how could she prod? These are things Brishti had told herself - until the night she couldnât stay silent.
The couple was coming up on their fifth month together and Park Jimin had gifted Namjoon a ticket to the final show of the season as a token of gratitude, for having heard his story.
Brishti was nervous about going to this kind of a gathering and had told her husband to meet her there.
She had enlisted the help of Sayuri-san to look appropriate for the event. Her slightly longer hair was clipped and her eyes were kohled. She wore a burgundy knee length fringe-ended dress that she had received from her gracious host, stylist and make-up artist - an inheritance of her brilliant life tucked into the black pearl beading and deco design. It was a big departure from the usual tie-die or band tees and jeans with her baggy coat. She had carried the coat but felt this strange sort of compulsion to stand in the cold air in the noodle strap dress, for him to see her.
She felt butterflies in her stomach and kept fiddling with the coat she had draped over her arm. It was electric when she saw him.
Namjoon looked gorgeous in a tux. All of Brishtiâs nerves were soothed just by looking at him. He had brushed his hair back. Tall and dashing - better than any heathcliffe could ever be. And with his reading glasses, he looked like the lead of a romance novella that would make all the women swoon. Indeed she was swooning. Brishti was suddenly warm in the chilly, windy night. And when Namjoon saw her, blood rushed to her cheeks. Everything inside her was running helter skelter in a panic. Brishti felt everything drop in the few moments it took for Namjoon to reach the top of the stairs. Dolled up like this, outside of her element, she felt like an imposter. Some angel needed to be standing in her place. For the first time, feigning beauty, Brishti felt like she wasnât worthy of her husband.
She was finally able to keep her feelings aside when he reached her.
Namjoon kissed her palm like a gentleman and whispered in her ear, âLetâs go home⊠I need a private kind of danceâŠâ Brishti blushed. Namjoon put his arm around her and felt the chill that had settled on her skin. âArenât you cold? Why didnât you wear the coat?â Namjoon asked. Brishti just shook her head no and the two of them walked in.
Brishti assumed that the ballet would be a welcome distraction from the storm that brewed within her. She had read up about the show, the piece they were going to perform -
Tchaikovskyâs venerated Swan Lake. The story of a young girl who falls in love with a prince who promises to save her but fails. Ofcourse there were finer nuances to the story but this was the basic plot. As the lights dimmed, Brishti felt pulled in by the music, the eerie beauty of itâs melody played in perfectly with the questions that were swirling around in Brishtiâs mind -
Why do I feel wrong?
Is this what Yoongi was talking about? Anxiety�
Why does Namjoon look so... different?
Why is he so quiet, so⊠distantâŠItâs like heâs keeping himself away from me despite being right next to me, arm in arm, like the true Namjoon is somewhere in a glass case? Deep deep beneath whatever this creature is who is next to me?
Iâm thinking too much. No. What is this? Why am I feeling this way?
Itâs the music⊠no its not just the music⊠something is fucking wrong because all I feel like doing is breaking that glass case thatâs locked away My Namjoon and presented this fucking imposter. What the hell is going on?!
Brishti barely managed to keep it together. She kept her eyes on stageâŠ
It was like seeing a moving painting being created by invisible hands and the music was the sound of the brushstrokes, amplified. Park Jimin was playing Rothbart, the owl-like magician who curses Odette into a swan until she finds someone who would promise to love her forever. The questions in her mind and the power of the spectacle before her forced her tears to keep flowing.
Namjoon saw Brishti cry and held on to her. But the more he tried to comfort her, the more uneasy she became, the more she coudlnât contain the tears in her eyes.
The curtain fell at the end of Act three when the prince realises he has been tricked. Brishti, somehow, mirrored his grief. The prince was cheated by Rothbart into believing that his daughter, Odile, was Odette. Rothbart relished his plan so despicably it made Brishtiâs stomach turn. The prince had already declared to the ballroom full of people his vow to love and marry the maiden by his side - Odile, not Odette. Park Jimin played Rothbart so skillfully, so beautifully that despite being the villain, despite being covered from head to toe, he was the star. Rothbart giggled delightfully as he revealed to the prince that the girl in his arms wasnât Odette at all. That Odette was waiting for her prince by the lake. The curtain fell as the prince felt the stab of betrayal and rushed to Odette.
Brishti rushed to where she did not know. She wanted to get away from Namjoon, from this feeling that she couldnât understand, couldnât explain. She was angry. She wanted to break something. Tears still flowing down her face, she found a corner that was hidden away in darkness. She went in. Brishti sat on the couch there, for what seemed like eternity, breathing heavily. Nothing made sense. It felt like her insides were twisting into each other. Suddenly, though, a door creaked open and out came an angel. A man, glowing, having just freshened up. He saw her, saw her fear and instead of pulling back in shock, approached with a strange kindness. He held her wrist and stayed silent for a moment.
His beauty was also a kindness to her. In that moment, Brishti could breathe a little bit better. He sat down by her knees, on the floor and when he spoke, his voice flowed like a tonic, âFirst time at the ballet? Itâs overwhelming⊠I know. Youâre okay. You are safe. Rothbart is not here. Talk to me⊠what are you feeling?â
The tears kept flowing. This man was different, she knew he understood what she was feeling like. She felt safe, but not as if she was with a saviour, rather as though she was with another victim.
âWhat are you feelingâŠâ Park Jimin repeated. The pieces were falling into place in her head. This is Park Jimin, the man who danced as Rothbart. The man who should have danced the Prince. Who should have played Odette and Odile.
âI feel⊠rage.â Brishti trembled as she spoke. She could breathe again.
âYes⊠Rothbart is⊠evil⊠Iâm sorry-â
Brishti nodded her head no. âAt the prince.â
Jimin was surprised. âLet it out. You can scream in here and no one would know.â
Brishti didnât need another invitation, but her rage wasnât a scream, it was a whisper - âI want to hit the prince. How could he not now? He couldnât see that that girl was not Odette? Is he blind? The way she moved, the way she danced⊠which only means⊠it means that the prince knew⊠somewhere he felt doubt but he⊠He couldnât fucking trust himself enough?! I donât know why this is breaking my heart⊠Why canât people trust in themselves?! Itâs a pathetic fucking excuse and I canât buy it⊠I just canât. Why did the prince...â Her hands covered her face as she wiped her tears. She composed herself.
Jimin pulled out a kerchief. âMay I?â Brishti nodded and he dabbed her face with care.
âThe prince trusted his sight more than his soul. And now, Odette will die because of it. As always, the woman pays the price.â
âHe dies too, you know.â
âWhat a wasteâŠâ
Jimin smiled, âThank you⊠for watching the show, for feeling it so much.â
Brishti managed a weak smile, âThank you.â Jimin stepped away and sat next to her, at a respectable distance. âIâm being lied to.â
Jimin nodded, âI know what thatâs like. I feel that rage against the prince too. And still, we must be kind to our liars.â
Brishti clenched her teeth, âWhy? Whereâs the fairness in that?â
Jimin moves away, in a dejected kind of daze and pours himself a drink, âThatâs the biggest lie, fairness. Cruel joke.â
Brishti walked toward the door. âI should go⊠Thank you.â
Jimin raised his glass to her.
Brishti wore her coat and walked toward the exit. She found Namjoon in a panic and suddenly felt like she could reach him. He looked so relieved to see her. She couldnât help but feel awash with love as he crashed into her in the warmest hug. It was as if he was the one who was lost.
âAre you okay? Why were you crying?â Namjoon asked her as he stroked her head and held her in the hug for as long as she needed.
âI need to ask you something.â Brishti whispered as she pulled away. They began walking down the stairs of the theatre.
âĂnything.â Namjoon replied.
âYour firm⊠they refused the Jimin case, right?â
Namjoon froze. His jaw locked up. âLetâs go home.â
The rest of the way, neither of them spoke a word. They entered their home in a cold silence. They washed the night off themselves and entered their bedroom, which was completely devoid of the heat and desire that usually filled it right up to the ceiling. What used to feel like an ocean, now felt like a vacuum.
When Namjoon walked in, Brishti reminded him, as kindly as she could,âI said I need to ask you something. You said, âanythingâ.â
âIâm sorry. I donât want to talk about it.â Namjoon was cold again. Unfeeling. Unreachable.
Brishti tried her best to be calm⊠âWhen would you want to talk about it?â
Namjoon breathed in - âWhy? Am I answerable to you?â
âYes.â
âWell, we disagree. I donât think I am answerable to you. What would you have done if I wouldnât have told you about it in the first place?â
âI would still be feeling what Iâm feeling⊠I would be even more furious though.â
âFu- why would you be furious? I have to work there, I lost the account. Iâm feeling hurt and disappointed in myself and instead of helping me, youâre angry?! What the hell could you be angry at?!â
âIâm being lied to. Iâm being tricked.â
âWhat?!â the contempt on Namjoonâs face made her head throb. He was angry now.
âThere are two Namjoons here. Iâm being told thereâs only one and--â
âThat is some philosophical trash that you learned from one of your books. Real life doesnât work that way. But how would you know?! You donât have a real job. You have a hobby. A hobby of stacking books in order. Youâre just plain lucky that someone is paying you for your hobby. Thatâs not a job. You of all people cannot tell me about the things I have to do to keep my job. I have tried my best to be as honest as I can be--â
âAs honest as you can --â
âListen to me!â Namjoon thundered. His loud voice might as well have been a punch. It rang through her body and rattled her bones. She had tears in her eyes but clenched them down as Namjoon continued yelling, âEnough⊠enough with the fucking tears. What the fuck are you so sad about?! I donât need you to pity me. I donât need anyone to feel sad for me. I have tried to be a good man - do you even know how much other men donât even mention to their wives?! I told you everything. EVERYTHING. And now Iâm being punished for it. Time and time again I tried to console you⊠even though I was the one hurting⊠I tried to be there for you and tell you⊠as long as I have --â
Brishti couldnât take it anymore âDonât. Say that.â She didnât yell. Her voice was just above a whisper and yet it sent a chill down Namjoonâs spine. She wiped her tears. âI didnât ask to be consoled. I was just⊠curious. If a few questions from me hurt so much maybe you should ask yourself why. Iâm not lucky that someone decided to pay me for my hobby. Itâs nice to know what you really think of my job. But whatever you think, I created my job. I created my life. I fought to come to london. I fought for the right to earn--â
âOh please... spare me the feminist lecture...â scoffed Namjoon.
âSure. Take up Jiminâs case.â
Namjoon felt the burn of white hot rage. He wanted to strangle her. He was so used to touching her⊠and she was his⊠in this bedroom, he had made her his. He wasnât thinking. Namjoon strode toward her and held one massive palm over her mouth and the other on her neck and pinned her to the wall. âYOU WOULDNâT HAVE KNOWN ABOUT THAT IF I DIDNâT TELL YOU.â
It took him a few moments to realise what he was doing. Brishti was shocked and tried to scream but no voice came out. She was trying to get him out of his daze when he finally saw her, saw his Rim, horrified⊠by him. Namjoon pulled his hands back instantly. He saw a red bruise bloom where his hands were - on her face and on her neck.
âThis is how you make your conscience shut up?â Brishtiâs voice was hoarse. âYou think this has nothing to do with your conscience? With the best part of you? The part that you made me fall in love with? Are you really telling me you donât know that this is why you canât write the way you used to⊠Youâre killing my Joon and asking me to stay silent. I canât.â
The searing anger still hadnât died and it burst out of him, âWhy are we fighting like this⊠over Jimin⊠why donât you take up his case if you fucking love him so much?â
âWhat do you think Iâm doing right now?â
âYou⊠Why are you fighting for him against me?!â It was here that Namjoon realised his armour was gone. The idea of who he is... suddenly vanished. And the one thing that had made him feel safe, like his true self, was slipping away. âYouâre saying⊠just tell me⊠youâre saying what I think youâre saying.â
Brishti did him the only kindness she had left in her, she explained, âJimin wants to leave but canât. He stays because he needs to dance. He stays because he cannot get out of his contract. You say you want to help people like Jimin, you roll your eyes at white people who canât pronounce our names, you feel guilty for asians who have much less than we do⊠but then you also donât raise an issue when your boss holds meetings in clubs where people of other races and dogs and women are not allowed. You work overtime for the privilege of weekends⊠You say you are trying but⊠as far as I know⊠you donât have a non-compete clause in your contract, Namjoon.â
That hit him like an iceberg. Namjoonâs legs gave way and he just sat on the bed.
He watched as Brishti put on her coat and left, covering her bruises with a scarf.
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Chapter 6 - to be posted.
#bts kim namjoon#kim namjoon#forever rain#fanfic#namjoon fluff#namjoon arranged marriage#namjoon x oc#arranged marriage#slow burn#slow burn fic#fluff fic#bts fanfic#bts#indian oc#red thread fics
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can ik who's in your icon~ thank you <3
yess bb of course!! itâs saki from emergence (NHENTAI LINK DONâT OPEN IN PUBLIC MAYBE) itâs an infamous doujin for the dark and brutal themes so please please pleeeease if you want to read it, heed the trigger warnings! âĄâĄ
#urusai! baka#tw: 177013#I THINK WAS MY TAG FOR IT ALAKOAJA#i kinda rambled about it in that tag so if u wanna get an idea of what its about aokaoaka OR THE THEMES#WHICH BTW ILL LIST HERE SO U DONT EVEN HAVE TO CLICK INTO THE LINK#BUTâ themes of childabuse/noncon/addiction/prostitution etcetc#its a super brutal spiral so OAKAOJAO#BUT I think it serves (ironically) as a cautionary?? in a way???#ANYWAYS ANYWAYS#PLS HEED THE WARNINGS IF UR GONNA READ IT#AND FEEL FREE TO COME BACK AND SCREAM WITH ME ABOUT IT IF U WANNAAAA#it also goes by metamorphosis or 177013 which is its nhentai code so#nodnod#i just call it emergence hehe
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