#SHE SIMPS FOR TWILIGHT SO BAD

[rafrfr]

What my friend nicknamed each LU boy:

(She never learned the fandom names nor has she picked up a Legend of Zelda game. I forced her to read LU because I wanted her to)

The friend in question: @theachskid

Warriors: Green, because of his tunic. I asked and she said "I saw green so I said green". I almost had a heart attack when she said that but he's Green I guess.

Time: Bluehead, because of the marks on his forehead. I don't...I don't know.

Four: Laurence. She thought Four was a girl lmao. When she first saw Four she asked if he was a girl and I just went "...yes😈" to see what would happen. She was so upset when she found out Four was not a girl because she loved lesbian Four x Dot. I regret nothing.

Twilight: Insert Name Here. I hate it. I hate saying it so much. It's too long but she said she couldn't think of anything else.

Wild: Bonbon. I can't explain it. It's so...what?? Why??? I never asked her and I don't want to know why she chose Bonbon

Sky: Shadow. This is where my second heart attack comes in. She said it was because he looked so emo. The Shadow. The (probably) main bad guy in LU? Shadow Link? Four Swords? I hate calling him Shadow when I talk to her about him for obvious reasons.

Hyrule: Mistake. I can't explain it. She says it's because he looks like a mistake (I'm so sorry Riri) and whenever she reads his lines it's always in the most flamboyant voice she can muster. I hate it but it's perfect.

Legend: Fortnite. This is because when we were deciding names, she was just naming stuff in her room and I said "No, choose something better" and she chose Fortnite. It's perfect.

Wind: Frederick. When she first saw Wind in the first chapter, she laughed and called him Frederick. Wind was the first one she named and was her favorite for a long time (Until she started simping for Twilight so bad. It's so bad)

[holy-mother-of-whumpers]

I've been reading these Age of Bronze comics - I LOVE the Bronze Age Collapse and I LOVE the Epic Cycle, how could I not?? - so now you're going to hear about it 🥸

It's an adaptation, not a retelling, so we get to read about our guys with basically no angle :D just them committing crimes on page akfjdkjd

What I didn't like 😐👎

100% personal complaints no actual intellectual commentary to be found here

- how it took the medieval tradition of Calchas being a runaway Trojan and that sappy Troilus/Cressida romance. I don't like those traditions.

- the Troilus/Cressida romance xD it's unbelievably slow and boring and turned me into a hater of these two. Achilles should have killed Troilus harder. I'm here for the war, not world's worst slowburn (after this I actually miss Twilight, Edward and Bella had more personality)

- Diomedes going for Cressida when Odysseus is right there?! 0/10 unrealistic. We got pathetically little of their bromance for the ages.

- Odysseus is not incredibly hot?! All the simping Homer did for this guy should show. Why is he balding where are the hyacinth curls🪻

- I didn't get to see Troilus die 😭 the series ended before it happened.

- I didn't get to see Palamedes die 😭 I'm serious about being here for the crimes ok, someone's gotta bleed.

- the series ended before most of my favorite moments 😓

- I'd have loved more gods. Nymphs are people but I saw no deity on page, that's always a bit of a downer.

- while Helen admits she feels under a goddess' influence, she's still a bit too happy with Paris. I was so looking forwards to how this would turn into her Iliad self that just telling Paris he should have been killed by Menelaos fjskjfks also Andromache calling her vain :( being pretty doesn't necessarily mean you are vain, you don't get a choice on your looks.

What I liked! 😁👍

- Most of everything else actually!!!

- Calchas making up the prophecy of Troilus having to die before his 20th birthday so his daughter can move on. Me too, Calchas, me too.

- THE BRONZE AGE AESTHETIC is incredible 🤩 I think Priam's treasure was dated to be earlier however look at the inspiration from the Mask of Agamemnon for Aga's moustaches and Clytemnestra's crown! Look!

Paris actually strolling around with his leopard skin and legit Minoan/Mycenaean dresses!

- it's even funny sometimes. It's not a comedic comic but Achilles got roasted a couple of time LMAO my standards are low ok

- Achilles meeting Helen from that one episode we lost :( here it lives again!

- Achilles and Iphigenia sharing a kiss 😘.

- the Iphigenia's Sacrifice issue is legit the best just go read it already (IT'S FREE). It pressed on the cursed family history, from Tantalos onwards, it's perfectly tragic and inevitable 😭👍

- Agamemnon. He's really fine 😙👌, dramatic, petty, tragic, he's having this bromance with Odysseus I was so invested I legit at a certain point I was reading it for them xD just look at him having a terrible time

- Menelaos loving his wife. Too many retellings made him the bad guy Helen runs from, I'm happy to see it's not the case. In the Embassy to Troy issue he has THE WORST time ever with Helen telling him she wants to stay (she's conflicted too). He gets drunk afterwards and cries reminiscing about her. It's so sad people. Menelaos Needs A Hug (Ancient Greek Mythology and Lore)

Helen previously said she left Hermione behind because he was king by marriage and she didn't want him to lose his throne because of her (aw? Kinda?) is there still hope?

[redcamellia13]

Manga for the Toilet Crew + Extras

(Some of these mangas I haven’t finished yet, so if there are any inaccuracies blame that- spoiler free)

Aoi (girl): Oshi no Ko. 100,000,000%. Never been more confident in a recommendation in my life. Ai, Kana and Akane would hit her so. Damn. Hard, and if she doesn’t end up sobbing on the floor by the end of 2.5D Stageplay I don’t think anything I ever thought about her was accurate.

Nene: Hmmm, this one’s a bit hard… I’d say Fruits Basket. Her fantasies about hot princes are a bit like the manga, even if I don’t personally enjoy it. Even she would admit it was kinda bad, but she would simp hardddd for Yuki (but she secretly wants Tohru to get with Kyo)

Hanako: DANDADAN. The pervert vibes, the stellar action, and the way his ideal picture of himself (a kaiju) is a bit like the supernaturals in DANDADAN all fit like a glove. He would probably get really mad at the representation of yokai, but all sins would be forgiven once he hits Acrobatic Silky. Nene thought the bathrooms were flooding because he was crying so much.

Teru: Spy X Family. He just wants to have a happy normal family and to see Twilight/Loid, Yor, and Anya accomplish it under certainly not normal circumstances gives him a bit of hope. It also acts as a band-aid when things are going particularly bad in his life.

Kou: Ah, this one’s a bit hard too but if I had to choose it would be a classic Shounen that’s super action packed, maybe Dragon Ball Z? I just don’t know any manga that fit him very well :P

[yourlocaltreesimp]

Somethin’ Stupid

It’s been a while since i’ve written anything for the Sacred Realm, but here’s something for my wife, @trippygalaxy. <3 Worlds content because she’s a simp

Cw: minor/light gore

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

The majority of the spirits within the Realm were quite similar. Equally as chivalrous and heroic as the last. They lived up to their titles, to their reputations and tales.

They were all Links.

They were all the Hero of Hyrule.

All except for Worlds.

Now, that’s not to say those labels didn’t fit him exactly— because they did. He was a hero, he was a Link, he did save Hyrule. But to the same effect, he also wasn’t purely just a hero. He wasn’t just Link and he didn’t just save Hyrule.

He was so much beyond what he was made out to be.

Which was why it was so frustrating when he still wasn’t enough.

Time and time again he’d save people, slay the bad guy, relinquish evil only to be called upon again. His hands never left his sword and his mind never left the battlefield. He was a Hero, through and through.

Even if it meant he’d never be seen for what he could be if he’d just be laid to rest.

He was tired of falling short, too.

Tired of watching people and things he loves slip past his fingertips in the name of ‘Heroism’.

Time got to fall in love, despite his sourness.

Twilight had a wife and child, a whole life outside of purging darkness from Hyrule.

Wild got to enjoy his life in somewhat solitude, wandering around his Hyrule and working on his tech.

Even the newest Link got to keep some part of himself alive and whole.

So why couldn’t he just have someone something.

Sky thought it was because he wouldn’t let himself. That despite the many times hope has been ripped from his hands, it’s not Hylia that’s made him let go. Maybe it’s just that he stopped holding on. That he let go. That he made himself move on.

He wouldn’t let Sky be right.

Not this time, at least.

Not while you lay bloodied beyond recognition.

Not while malice chews at your flesh, and leeches off your life.

You were too good. To him, To the world.

There aren’t many people who would thank him so sweetly for things he did. There are fewer then who would throw themselves under the wide arch of a sword to keep him safe, even if he can’t be harmed in this state.

He was real to you.

Living and breathing beyond just being the spirit of a hero, he was real to you.

He knew you were too good to slip past him, to leave him with that sickening feeling in his gut at what he should’ve done. What he should’ve said.

He wouldn’t let himself lose you.

He couldn’t.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

And He didn’t.

Many potions and fairies later, you were stable. Drowsy as you were, your lungs drew breath and your heart limped along. You were weak, but it didn’t matter.

Awkwardly, he stood by your cot, staring down at you with a mix of thought and feeling running through his mind. Sorrow, anxiety and that odd feeling of anticipation you stirred in his gut.

He didn’t quite understand it— you. Your motives were foggy in his mind, your actions lacking any motivation he thought compelling enough to risk your own life. He didn’t understand the guilt he felt. He felt bad, of course. You were injured and he was the only one to blame. That he understood well and clear. But it was the heavy feeling, looking down at you now as your body struggles to work that he feels like he doesn’t know what he’s doing.

He’s scared.

“Enjoying the view?” You croak, sitting up and downing the glass of water set at your bedside. The amusement in your eyes has his heart running so familiarly.

“I didn’t know you could get more gross.” He rolls his eyes, shoving back the apologies as they claw in his throat. Slightly, he winces at the hostility in his tone. He never was good at letting himself be, was he? “But here you are”

“Oh that’s right, I forgot spirits can’t see their reflection” Your voice is light, as if genuinely recalling some lost fact. A light smile pulls at your lips, emphasising the teasing in your tone.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He squinted.

“Nothing” You shrugged him off. The room is quiet. Somewhere he can make out Link shuffling about, but the Inn is still aside from that. Dust dances in the last few beams of sunlight, and he mourns how long it’s been since he’s been able to recall such detail.

You tend to do that to him though.

“Y’know” He starts, picking at his cuticles “You should really give more warning before you do something dumb like that.” He pauses to look at you as you huff.

“Look, I’m fine-“ You start, throwing your hands up defensively.

“You almost weren’t” His voice is sharp, silencing any argument you might’ve brought, “You were in a horrible state. And I’m not quite sure if you haven’t realised, but you don’t get a second chance.” His voice begins to pick up his panic, quickening as he remembers just how much he’s lost to be here.

Things he wants you to never go through.

“You do something stupid like that and don’t stop to even consider what might happen. What you might be leaving behind. And I can’t always be there to hold you back. I can’t always be there to make sure you’re safe.” He sees the doubt in your eyes. The pleading argument that you’ll be ok. That he’s worrying too much. That he can let you go.

But for the life of him, dead as it may be, He doesn’t care.

“I know you’re capable. I know you’re strong. But you won’t always be strong enough. You won’t always make it out fine. And We-“ His throat seizes, and he lets himself just be vulnerable.

“I need you alive.” His eyes search your own for any response, any answers. Your pursed lips don’t move to form words, and he’s ready to just consider it a loss.

“So maybe let’s stop with the dumb choices, o-“ He doesn’t even get to finish his sarcastic remark before you tug him by the collar to your lips. Between every journey through hell and back, there’s never been more relief than in this moment. Your lips are cracked and bloodied, but sweet nonetheless.

“Only if you stop it with the sarcasm” you mutter against his lips.

“Oh, well then we’re both at a loss” He rolls his eyes, pulling you closer again.

[emeraldsk]

Headcannons I Got (Shadow Milk And His Minions Edition)

PUTTING A READ MORE, THERE'S A LOT OF RAMBLING.

.

.

Okay uh SO-

First off.

Since most of it is realting to a Shadow Milk one, here's one for the twerps LOL

I see them as like... Siblings. Like, yeah, Candy and Sapphire (I'm naming them these now deal with it LOL) are related, but they're not related to Shadow there.

Kinda could explain the act that they're all so close, and maybe Shadow treats them like... 'I'm going to think of you like my kids sometimes but I'll never admit it' kinda.

Sapphire is the one who is more mature obviously, and does his best to keep Candy in check.

It does not work sometimes.

But sometimes, since they are family, Candy can be intimidated kinda by him and snap out of her idiocy.

This 'not related to her boss' thing also kinda helps with her gushing over Shadow I feel, cause that's just simping. She's a simp. Am I the only one who thinks of it as this?

Okay, big tangent on part one done.

Part 2.

Oh dear crap, yall are gonna hate me on this ramble.

But hear me out.

...

Vampire Shadow Milk.

BEFORE YOU ASK...

Yeah it's cause of bias LOL BUT I MMMM-

Okay so-

I kinda felt like if someone was being pulled into deceit, and if they wanted to stay, they'd have to permanently stay.

And like.

He's immortal, right? If I got the wrong facts lemme know-

And if he had gained Candy and Sapphire before being locked up (cause he's just... so chill with them both once we get to the spire, like h o w), then they're probably immortal somehow, right?

Probably not?

Idc rn, I got a thought LOL

So listen to this. Remember those wings on Candy and Sapphire?

So now you might wonder why they have wings but Shadow doesn't.

Simple.

Imagine.

In the Cookie Run world (yes I know there's Vampire Cookie but shush-), what if he was the first ever vampire?

I mean seriously, he's existed for how long in that tree?

And before you say that the other beasts were there too shush Idk what to do with that fact it's a plot hole lol

Maybe the deceit shiz gave him so much power or something that he just-

Became a vampire?? Somehow???

Oh and I even got an idea on how the twerps would've been turned too.

My idea on how a person can become a vampire isn't the blood stealing or just a bite or blah blah blah. The vampire's gotta purposefully get their venom into you. The sucking's just for feeding.

So I was thinking, and uh-

I can imagine that Candy was too young for Shadow to comfortably bite her.

And Sapphire didn't want a bite mark, cause that'd just look bad publicly. Cause I feel he'd be that much of a drama queen sometimes.

So I can just imagine Shadow straining his venom into two cups, then letting them drink it. And boom. They're vampires now.

And yes they'd drink blood. But idk about sun burning. I'm tempted to say no on that, but I'd definitely not give them the horrid 'Twilight' treatment. That's a WIP tbh.

Okay. I think that's done.

NOW ANOTHER SHADOW MILK ONE LOL

Okay so remember the shapeshifting? Can we talk about the shapeshifting guys, I NEED TO TALK ABOUT THE SHAPESHIFTING- /edited ref

The fact he can just- Switch genders had always irked me.

No it's totally not cause I'm mostly gay shut LOL-

Like I'm sorry??? You're a woman now???

So.

Hehehehehehehe *rubbing hands evily*

Imma give him something I have.

That I gain.

Consistently.

And make him suffer.

Yall women know what I'm thinkin of.

My idea is that if he stays as a woman for too long (or conveniently is her on a certain date), he'll...

Find out his body changed... Down there.

That's right folks, I've been obsessing over this guy so much that I've realized that he could have a period.

And the first time he gets it, oooh I can just imagine him crumbling down in just how much PAIN he's in.

But that's privately, cause how dare he show that to anyone.

The first time he'd get it, I feel he'd become himself again to see if it will go away.

But the whole period shebang KEEPS GOING for about a week or however long most people's keeps going, idk.

And he'd have NO HELP. Seriously, if this happened after escaping the tree, all he has for a female is Candy. But I feel like she's either too young to have had it yet, or just she doesn't get them cause plot or something lol.

Oh also, with his shapeshifting thing AND YES THIS IS A DIFFERENT HEADCANNON, the tail.

If you've seen my Shadow drawings, you know I give him a snake tail.

Mostly cause I love drawing tails BUT. I'd like to think of him like he looks like a snake. Kinda.

Cause I see him and think of Satan in uh Genesis in the bible, with the snake deceiving Eve and stuff.

I wanna think he'd own up to that comparison, feel kinda proud of it.

Plus, it makes him feel cool.

ANYWAY uhh hope yall enjoyed and uh be happy :D

[ao3feed-twiyor]

you're my weakness

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/FytunpS by serenasversion Loid is terrified. After 10 years, he’s not ready to leave his family. Anya is now an imperial scholar, and Handler decided he only needs 3 more meetings to extract all the information Desmond is willing to give. His only chance? To truly be Desmond’s friend. If he’s constantly gaining new info from Desmond, Handler won’t pull him from Strix. It’s no longer for the mission, but for his family instead. Yor is free. She is finally leaving Garden. She is excited to no longer keep secrets from Loid and Anya, excited to spend more time with Anya, and more than anything, excited to explore her budding relationship with Loid. Anya is happy. Her parents flirt all the time. Her friendship with Becky is super strong. She’s an imperial scholar! Nothing could make her life better. Except, maybe, a real connection or something more with the boy she’s been frenemies with for years. Damian is lonely. He doesn't have real friends to confide in, not even Ewen and Emile. He has no connection with his parents, and Demetrius is off god knows where. The only person he can confide in is Anya, who he’s supposed to hate. And maybe his feelings from their first year at Eden are returning…but that’s okay, right? At least he’s not so lonely anymore. Words: 1312, Chapters: 1/15, Language: English Fandoms: SPY x FAMILY (Manga), SPY x FAMILY (Anime) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: F/M Characters: Anya Forger, Loid Forger | Twilight, Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, Damian Desmond, Becky Blackbell, Ewen Egeburg, Emile Elman, Sylvia Sherwood | Handler, Bond (SPY x FAMILY) Relationships: Loid Forger | Twilight/Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, Damian Desmond/Anya Forger, Anya Forger & Loid Forger | Twilight & Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, Becky Blackbell & Anya Forger, Damian Desmond & Ewen Egeburg & Emile Elman, Becky Blackbell & Damian Desmond & Ewen Egeburg & Emile Elman & Anya Forger, Loid Forger | Twilight & Sylvia Sherwood | Handler, Damian Desmond & Loid Forger | Twilight Additional Tags: Aged-Up Character(s), Drama & Romance, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Loid Forger | Twilight Needs a Hug, Mutual Pining, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Simp Damian Desmond, Simp Loid Forger | Twilight, Damian Desmond Needs a Hug, Eden Academy (SPY x FAMILY), Operation Strix (SPY x FAMILY), WISE (SPY x FAMILY), Garden (SPY x FAMILY), Damian Desmond is Bad at Feelings, Angsty Damian Desmond, this is just a fun little story read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/FytunpS

[smartkookiee]

knock knock… guess who it is?!

i took my time to read the new vampire series and i’m so hooked already 😤 i’m a twilight girly (ironically never been fan of the vampire diaries though) so if you want a vampire fan IM THE ONE OK?! i love how simp this Jk is, reminds me of my beloved husband Edward ❤️‍🔥😫

the Yoongi plot is so fcking good, i’m already have my theories (or hopes lol, there is no way this fic is finishing without a Monique/Yoongi reunion)

also the little flashback that Jk had with Jimin and Jin had something to do with the Yoongi stuff or is another thing? that was the only thing i couldn’t understand 100%

i love that you are kinda creating your own vampire rules and universe ❤️ you are so creative that it amazes me and i’m so so SO excited for what’s coming!!!

also2: i’m the worst at reading things that are actually important! i just realized today that you have the: they/them tag and now i feel like i’ve been kinda disrespectful IM SORRY 😵‍💫

also3: i realized we are the same age, yay!!!

I've been waiting for this one TURN IT UPPPP!!!!!!

Gaby I was just saying last night I was like where is she... I'm being so patient ( also never seen vampire diaries )

The scene with Jin, Jungkook, and Jin was intentionally vague on purpose but I can say that has to do with some Jungkook history, not Yoongi history!! Its also present day not a flashback! Yoongi and Monique... heavy sigh. I WAS WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO BRING IT UP

also don't feel bad about the pronoun thing it's totally okay!

[toournextadventure]

I’m gonna jump on the train. I just think it’ll be hilarious to have a gn!r be a gentle giant, and everyone trusts them with their lives except for Sam 😭.

Sam: you’re tall, crazy fast and strong. You’re always fucking hot.

Tara: HEY!

Sam: I MEANT BODY HEAT, TARA! It’s suspicious. I know what you are…

R: *just a confused lil (gigantic) guy* what am I?

*everyone at the same time*

Tara: my love (a simp)

Mindy and Chad: a werewolf!

Sam: ghostface!

*everyone is hella confused now*

Mindy: I though you were trying to quote twilight and wanted the lines to fit R….

Chad: same

Tara: *covering her face*

Sam: uhhh…

R: does this mean you don’t like me? 🥺

Everyone would immediately want to give Sam a bonk. Cause how dare she make R feel bad!? They’re literally just a lil guy. They all know R would protect them with their life. I just know Sam would feel hella guilty after seeing a pout.

(I’m running on caffeine and spite rn 🫡)

-🤠

No because that sweet baby would just be over there cleaning, or making snacks, bringing everyone drinks while they're talking over all their Ghostface theories, and Sam is just watching them the whole time like "🤨 hmmmm." And the worst part? Sam is NOT afraid to call them out and the poor thing is over there looking like a kicked puppy because "I thought you liked me? But I made cookies 🥺"

Listen, I'm obsessed with just a pure, sweet, gentle giant that Sam just can't stop being suspicious of, it's got so much comedic potential

(Bruh you and me BOTH 🫡)

[aikoiya]

LoZ: Link's Attractiveness

Am I the only one who feels like, the more androgynous that Link gets, the less attractive I think he is?

Like, Twilight Link was, by far, the hottest Link. But then again, he was also the most physically masculine of the Links too.

Like, just look at this side-by-side comparison, ya'll!

I dunno about ya'll, but I know which design I prefer! It's the goat herder on the right in case you were in any way confused.

I don't know why they keep designing the Links more & more femininely. Though, I do remember reading something about one of the designers or something. Apparently, he asked his wife or whatever how she would make Link more attractive & she said what amounted to "make him look more like a girl" & I'm just sitting there thinking to myself, "please, don't."

Like, maybe Japanese women just prefer them with girly hips & bones like a bird, but not me. Which, looking at it, this seems to be indicative of the Sōshokukei Danshi (���食系男子, grass-eater men) trend that's become so big in Japan. Which, itself, is just something I'm very much not into. I just don't want a man who uses more cosmetics than I do, okay? I simply don't see it as attractive.

Like, why not just admit that they wanna date girls? Because that's what it seems like.

I just want another Link with abs, ya'll. Being traditionally masculine isn't a bad thing & shouldn't be treated as such.

I don't care if he's short (I mean, I'd like a tall Link, but I can live without one), but please give me a more masculine Link. Like, he doesn't even need to be uber muscular either, just don't make him so damn girlish, okay??

Like, I get that part of the appeal for a lot of people is that they can put themselves in his place & making him as androgynous as possible allows as many people as is possible to be able to fit into his place. But for me, personally, that's just not the draw.

I'm just not that into the whole reader or player insert thing because I like myself in reality where I am. When I play or read shit, I'm not doing it to read about or play myself unless it's a farming sim or some-such, I'm doing it to read about or play someone else.

Like, yeah, there will always be a little bit of "how would I do this" in it, but ultimately what I'm invested in is not me. I'm just not that self-obsessed & I like it that way.

All I'm saying, ya'll, is that masculinity is hot.

That's likely part of why so many are simping over Ganondorf. Because, for all his evilness, he's the most physically masculine person in damn near every game he appears in. Same with Sidon, he's pretty damn masculine too, just in a different way. You could even say that Rauru is also pretty masculine in his own way, just not the way that Ganondorf or Sidon are. Rather, he's more so in the way that a wise king is & even though I'm not really into the anthro thing unless it's werewolves (I own up to my flaws), I can definitely see why a lot of fans simp for him.

Now, don't get me wrong, Link is masculine in his own way. Trust me, there's a lot masculine about being a hero who helps people & saves the princess. And even just that sort of masculinity is very hot. He's just not very masculine physically. Especially with those hips. He's got too girly hips & he doesn't have the right build to make up for it the way that Rauru does.

Even Twilight Link wasn't extremely masculine.

Edit: Apparently, this post sparked some sort of ire? She insisted that I was being a bigot towards Japanese men & the Japanese culture as a whole, which... really doesn't sound right.

I thought all I did here was state my preferences.

Re-Edit: Someone made a very good point a bit ago somewhere else.

If you compare BotW Link to TotK Link, you might notice that he's gained a bit more muscle. And I'm obviously all for that, but it also got me thinking about something. What if the reason he had noodle arms before was because of the 100 years he was asleep?

I mean, it'd make sense, wouldn't it? That's a long time to be asleep, so why wouldn't he experience some form of Sarcopenia or muscle atrophy?

And if I'm right, then I'm suddenly not so disappointed in how wimpy he looks in BotW, because it suddenly makes every bit of sense.

Edit: A while ago, I learned that in TotK Wild gets a bit more buff. And it's true. So, now that I think back, it's entirely possible that the reason why he was so noodly in BotW may've been due to literally being asleep for 100 years.

If so, then I can let it slide in that case. Besides, he's more muscular now. Not as much as Twilight, but I'm cool with it.

LoZ General Masterlist

[missmonsters2]

VAN…I AM MORTIFIED. There is this girl in my math class right? And she sits sort of on the end of the first row. And I sit in the front which allows me to see her. I didn’t notice her at first because I am a studious pupil, but I did after. She’s a picture, a painting. A beautiful creature. And she reminded me of someone I knew and I kept looking back at her, and twice she caught me looking! I blushed so bad my whole face was red! Then I daughter her staring after. And she didn’t even look away when I caught her looking.

so I smiled and she smiled back. It was more of a smirk sort of. So then after class I’m walking on the campus grounds, it was my moms birthday so I had to text her so I sort of moved on the side of the walkway, still in view and everything. I’m texting my mom when I hear and see someone in front me just stop in there tracks, right in front me. I swear her shoes rubbed against the pavement so bad 😭 and I look and it’s her! And she’s just staring at me! So I made a stupid joke or something and she laughed and I went red faced and wished her a good day and she kept watching me as I walked and it was an interesting interaction. I know she’s by because her best friend is my cousin and she’s a big blabber mouth about everything. But I’m wondering Van…should I talk to her about it, be like “sorry for staring at you the other day you just reminded me of someone” because I swear I felt like Edward from twilight 😭😭 she seemed sweet. Although I have no idea why she just stopped in front of me😂

the way you described her is very simp LOLL i support it. Was she making a move?? I have no idea but that's what I choose to believe LOL

Well, it seemed like she liked your staring, i think!! Totally think it's up to you if you want to bring it up to her to say why you were staring but just be prepared you'll have to explain who she reminded you of!

If not, no harm in trying to talk to her about other things to get to know her better ! :)))))))

good luck!!!!!

[rosaliesimp]

New Moon Reread Week 1

For those looking for the schedule.

I know I have until Monday, but I wanna share some of my little annotations I made during the original reread. Mine aren't as pretty as @the-twiilight-diaries, in fact, they're just words. But they're mine <3. Copied straight from what I wrote (except for the tiny stuff like this), with a bit of editing for clarity and explanation.

— — —

Chapters 1-3

pg.9 — Romeo and Juliet Parallels

I don't know much about the play but some parallels are clear. They are from two worlds that are not meant to touch. They are not meant to be together, defying everything that was set out for them. As for Paris, that would've been Juliet's natural progression, just like how Jacob later comments that he would've been Bella's natural progression in life has she not met Edward.

pg.25 — daddy-sorry daddy-sorry Carlisle my dilf <3 (this was my best annotation)

pg.26 — Slay, Alice, Slay!

Alice, aside from dilf Carlisle, might be the strongest! She knew her way of life from the start, so she probably has a higher tolerance. Edward probably just doesn't want to hurt Bella.

pg.30 — Religion Talk

Surprising that none of them are religious (christianity-wise), especially since they all grew up in times where they would likely be Christian of some sort (and because SMeyer is mormon). If I had to guess, Jasper probably lost faith fast. Having to kill humans on the battlefield was one thing, but killing humans for blood, turning humans for soldiers, then killing them once they are no longer useful probably makes you lose faith that this was all for a reason. Probably tried a bunch of other religions though. Emmett probably lost it over the years. Alice probably always doubted, with her visions and such (actually, I can see her believing strongly for a while now). Esme and Rosalie... Esme seems agnostic, and Rosalie probably still has a bit of faith left, but never says anything. She prays for a second chance as a human. Edward probably was as a human, probably always will be.

pg.42 — This scene hurts... a LOT.

The roles are reversed from Twilight, leaving to save a loved one. Where Bella left to save her mother, Edward leaves to save Bella. (side note from me: we know bella talks in her sleep. I really wish bella had nightmares about james leading up to this, and edward feels terrible, but this night, it's jasper's name, and that changes everything)

pg. 51 — 'I got up as soon... All of it.'

Bella thought she was going with them!! That honestly broke my heart.

pg.60 — Edward Leaves

Firstly, title drop! Secondly... wow. She's seriously numb. I feel bad... Edward has been her life since March, almost 7 months. She's become part of the family. To have that taken away hurts. Room by room of the house, and the faint hope that the foundation would hold, only to crumble beneath your feet. And there's nothing to rebuild with.

— — —

So. That's a lot. And I left out the simping too. Sadly, I lost my stickynotes of where the soundtrack would play. But I think I have some good stuff here. I hope you all have some happy re-reading though!!

[kwop-kilawtley]

this annoyed me so bad I’m gonna throw chairs in a bad way. It’s about FEMALE SELF LOVE? Um….. are you talking about Miss Bella Swan? The one who literally hates herself? And sees her humanity as worthless and inferior? The one who tries to kill herself over a fucking man she dated for a year? Is the self love in the room with us when Bella feels the only way she can love herself is to change literally every single ASPECT ABOUT HERSELF??? To be with a pretentious, classist, colonizer? And her happy ending is what? Genuinely everything she never wanted, besides Edward, who is her addiction. But okay yeah self love woooooo die for a man/addiction I guess !!!!

Team edwinos love to say team jacobs are fake twilight fans LMAO meanwhile we are in the trenches in our ship and in this fandom. I’d argue team Jacobs are more of twilight fans cause we actually care about the characters who were completely RUINED by the author. So happy I’m not a smeyer simp tho<3 stay safe tho!

“Twilight is about female voyeuristic self-love” no actually, Twilight is about the author’s Mormonism

It has an extremely glaring pro life plotline, it’s classist, it’s racist, it’s anti sex before marriage so much so that Edward doesn’t even open mouth kiss Bella the entire time they date, and the idea of marriage and having a baby at 18 years old is depicted as the ultimate reward and happily ever after for the female MC lol

[celibibratty]

"For a show called friendship is magic, this was a very toxic friend group(insert mane sixes image)"

For more that i Love the man3 six, i need to agree with that😅, this even was one of the reasons me and marina as kids didn't like/enjoyed friendsh1p 1s m4gic that much(tbh i still dont enjoy fim that much😒), I don't like much this t0xic talk ngl(this too much an ant1 thing), like, it just a cartoon, and sometimes t0xic can be interesting/funny, but anyway i want to complain about fim, so let's complain about it😂, they were so meanies, i hated it, It had various moments on this serie (specially in the first seasons) that they were so annoying with each other and me kid get it mad, i remember the first episode i watch it was one that tw1light wanted to enjoy a winter festival, but she wasn't "good" at anything And it had a moment that she volunter to help appl3jack by pushing a...idk what was the thing but it was a heavy thing that do something with the land, but twil1ght knowing that she wasn't that strong, but also not wanting to lose her only chance of being useful she pushes it Using her magic(but she was doing that in secret) and it had a moment that sp1ke was with applej4ck and seems he Said something like "she is doing great, isn't it?" And appl3jack responded like "Oh, really?"(in a angry/suspicious way) i remember me kid getting so mad with this, What you mean with that appl3jack💢,you don't think tw1light is capable of doing?💢,what its the problem with her using her magic?She is helping!💢Just because she can mess things up, you care more about getting things perfect than make your friend creates a memory with something (it wasn't a very good first impression of the show), another one, argh, this episode i/we hate it by itself, but oh god this moment made me mad, it was one episode where pink1e p1e volunter to babysit those fuckin mr and mrs cake babies, but everybody seems to not Support the idea (which it's okay), but i hate that the way they didnt support it wasn't like"oh, pinkie,you young and you're only Just one pony, taking care of two babies is hard", it was more like"OMG, NO,ITS PINKIE PIE,SHE IS TOO MUCH, SHE WILL HARM OUR BABIES,please, not her", Which this thing with p1nkie's way it's already another "t0xic"thing between the mane sixes in fim,in the show always has one of the man3 sixes that looks judgemental or bothered by pinkie's exagerated reactions/way(specially tw1light),and its kinda mean,like, that's just her way (Me simping for pony life)thats why i love pony life, i love that pinkie pie is loud and crazy as she is, but i dont feel any one of the mane sixes look down on her for it, she is their friend and they love her for it, i also like that pinkie is more than just character That appears to make things chaotic or come with a crowd,in pony life she has goals, she is responsible and sometimes she feels more things than just being the happy and social butterfly pony,(i mean in fim it has some ep that she's like that too💦, but i like more in pony life), Continuing talking about the episode, it has a moment that tw1light appears because she doubt pinkie's ability as if she is not responsible (talking like that doesn't seem that mean, but it anger me at the time) and also pinkie pie got mad by twilight comment, So mad that she even rejects twilight help and kick her out of the house, i feel so bad for pinkie pie in this episode, she cries, SHE CRIES, she cries of frustation, cuz everything was going wrong and she just wanted to prove to everybody that she is capable of doing it And twilight's comment Just made her wanted to prove more, i think it has more moments where the mane sixes are mean with each other in fim

[before-night]

simping for Alice moodboard

[where-i-overanalyze]

Soul Eater characters and their MLP Gen 4 equivalents

i will be disregarding all ships and familial relationships for this purely because it would make it WAY too complicated and this is my silly little haha. i already put too much thought into it, i cannot burden my mind with the restraint of familial and romantic relations.

first up, the main 7 characters. starting with the one who inspired this all:

Maka as Twilight Sparkle

she's got the wings, she's got the book smart, she's got the power of friendship on her side, it's perfect. this was all started b/c while rewatching the anime, we joked that Maka's dubbed voice sounded like Twilight. this one is the strongest comparison, it gets worse from here.

Soul as Spike

no offense to Soul, but he's usually secondary to Maka most of the time. snarky, sassy, and often asking questions. also, his name is Spike, Soul's got spiky hair, it makes sense.

Black☆Star as Rainbow Dash

cocky, proud, super strong, fast, and blue!! a lot of their development revolves around like valuing other people (Black☆Star is more about like,,,, becoming his own person but y'know) also they both have scratchy voices.

Tsubaki as Fluttershy

calm and mild mannered, but also on occasion has the ability to go apeshit. befriends someone who is quite strong and obnoxious that most characters find annoying.

Death the Kid as Rarity

obsessive about appearances and has a particularly fancy way of talking. pale?? distinctive hair. makes sense.

Patty as Pinkie Pie

no explanation necessary.

Liz as Apple Jack

older sister figure! blonde and realistic, kinda tough and used to having to work for stuff (though Liz doesn't have to do it too much anymore now that she and patty are chilling w/ Kid) also, AJ was the only one left of the mane 6 lol.

Crona as Princess Luna

obviously the moon connection, duh. dark aesthetic, doesn't understand other people, and gets kinda possessed by madness!! which leads into my next choice

Kishin Asura as Nightmare Moon

evil!! but also because they were a bit misunderstood. spreads their powers across the entire world. possesses someone who is also part of them. lives on the moon.

Lord Death as Princess Celestia

tall and a god figure, but also kind of royalty? super OP but also we barely get to see them fight or use their powers ever so that our lovely main characters can be the ones to defeat the big bad. questionable morals at times.

Stein as Discord

crazy ass bitch!! tall and a slightly concerning amount of people simp for them. looks stitched together, stuff sticking out of their heads.

Marie as Princess Cadance

Ox as Snips

weird hair,,,,,,,,,,

Harvar as Snails

tall?? Harvar's a spear so he's tall by default. he's also gold-ish when he's in weapon form so that counts, also pointy b/c unicorn and spear.

Jackie as Octavia

Jackie has to be Octavia b/c her name is based off of cellist Jacqueline du Pré and even though Jackie doesn't play cello, this is who she must be to fulfill her destiny. also, they both have dark hair.

Kim as DJ Pon 3 (Vinyl Scratch)

gay. unicorn, so she has magic like a witch

Kilik and the Pots as the Cutie Mark Crusaders

there's three of them and they are inseparable. do not separate them. Kilik can be Sweetie Belle b/c he's standing in the middle.

Sid as Big Mac

man of few words. super strong and ,,,,,,, angular?? idk they're both kinda blocky. sad eyes,,,,,,,, UNDERRATED.

Naigus as Zecora

doctor!!! also if i was a pony, i would have a crush on Zecora. i have a crush on Naigus. this is my reasoning.

Medusa as Chrysalis

evil. weird and confusing hair!! dark aesthetic with one accent color. insanely manipulative, undeniably slaying.

Arachne as The Storm King

this one comes as a suggestion from Tumblr mutual (and my literal current college suite mate) @xaltiide she says that this guy is "the big bad" but isn't doing Most of the bad stuff in comparison to the other villains.

and finally, my grand finale

Giriko and Justin as Flim and Flam

they suck!!!! they suck SO BAD!!!!!!!! and they're evil. HORRIBLE.

anyways, happy April fools everyone. i finished the last half of this post while an edible kicked in on a Friday night and i feel like that probably shows in what i have created, but i will stand by this.

[allexthakatt]

Okay so this idea has been running around my head for like a week and I think I have it all together. I hope this is readable cx

Pairing: Spencer Reid x FEM! Reader

CW: insecurities, poor body image, Spencer being a simp for reader, a little bit of alcohol (very brief), mentions of a case (not explicit)

---------------------

Not Like The Others

"Hey Pen Pen! We still on for dinner this weekend? I've been craving that tai food place for ages!" Y/n walked into the bat cave that was Penelope Garcia's office. It was a good day today, y/n had woken up earlier than she needed to, ate a healthy breakfast for once, got a little makeup on and even had enough time to do a little makeup. It was the beginning of a good day, she was hoping.

"Of course sista. You know I would never ever turn down a tai food night with my best friend." Penelope's bright attitude shined through every crevice of the room. It was hard to have a bad day around her in general. Penelope was just the sun in human form.

"Great. I got a brand new bottle of that Vanilla Crown and some Peppermint flavored Vodka! Some new movies, even though we don't really agree on some, I think I got a good selection of-"

Y/n was cut off by a knock at the door. Spencer walked in with files in his hand, intending to give them to Penelope for Rossi. However his tongue got caught in his mouth as he laid eyes upon y/n. She always made him feel like this; tongue tied and shy. Something about her just made his brain short circuit.

"I-uh. Ahem- I came to bring you these files for Rossi. He wanted you to go through them for him." It was impossible to keep up a cool demeanor with her around. He felt like a teenager.

"Well thank you, boy wonder." The air got suddenly awkward. No one really knew why- well maybe Spencer did. And it was not an awesome reason.

"Hi Spencer." Y/n said with a shy smile. Spencer had this same affect on her too. He just didn't know it even though it was so painfully obvious to Garcia in the room. "G-Good morning y/n. How uh.. How are you?" It was clear to Penelope that he was nervous. Y/n, however didn't seem to catch on. "I'm good, me and pen were talking of getting dinner this weekend is all..." The blush on y/ns cheeks also did not go unnoticed by Penelope. She makes a mental note to bring up this painful transaction later at dinner. Thankfully, before anymore torture can continue, JJ knocks on the door announcing there's a new case.

~

"So what the heck was up with you the other day with Spencer? You were so shy! Y/n is not a shy person." Saturday evening, Penelope and y/n sitting on her couch drinking Crown and watching Twilight. (It was Penelope's turn to pick the movie) Y/n let's her head fall, an apparent blush forming on her cheeks.

"I don't knooow pen. He makes me feel so shy and awkward. Like he's so attractive and sweet I just freeze up and forget how to speak words." Her best friend laughs and takes another sip, preparing to pause the movie because this is much more interesting than anything Bella could ever do.

"You have a crush on boy wonder! Who would've guessed! Can I plan your wedding? Ooh oh oh! Can I name your kids? Wait no- I'll gladly just take one named after me." Before she could continue Y/n put her hand over her friends mouth. "Hold on there, tiger. He probably doesn't even like me back! I mean you saw him that day. He wouldn't even look at me. And let's be honest, pen. Im not exactly his type." Penelope cocked her head to the side, urging Y/n to go on.

"Seriously pen? Spencer likes petite pretty girls. Smart and athletic, or shy and booky. I'm not at all like the girls he's liked or dated in the past. Face it, pen pen he's too good for me.." Whether it was the built up insecurities or the alcohol making her loose, she went on. "I'm no Maeve Donovan, or Lila Archer. Hell I'm not even close to JJ. And his latest girlfriend Max? She was perfect for him. Penelope I'm just not good enough and it sucks but it's true."

Y/n was nothing like JJ, or Lila, or even Maeve. She was more on the plus size, had a more colorful vocabulary. She knew how to play guitar, didn't really read books but rather preferred to listen to music and just chill. She was nothing like the pretty little women that typically caught Spencer's attention. And nothing broke her heart more.

"Y/n just because he's dated different people in the past doesn't mean you're no good for him. Maybe all those relationships didn't work out because they weren't right for him to begin with. Don't assume his feelings, Y/n. Just saying." Y/n took another sip and pressed play. "Please can we talk about something else? I don't wanna be sad tonight." Garcia smiled and changes the subject to Keanu Reeves and puppies.

~

Monday came around quicker than anyone anticipated. She couldn't get Penelope's words out of her head. Could she really have a chance with Spencer Reid? The thought sent butterflies in her stomach. She was practically in love with the man. He was always in the back of her mind, taunting her with those beautiful lips she'd do anything to kiss. His long curly hair she'd love to grip and pull. His-

"Good morning miss Y/n! How was your weekend?" Tara was in a great mood this morning it seems. "Oh hey, it was pretty good actually. And yours? What'd you do?" Out of everyone on the team, (except Penelope of course) Y/n gets along with Tara best. Their personalities bounce off each other in such a way Y/n never feels judged. Penelope and Tara are probably her two best friends in the whole world.

"It was rather great! You know I heard so very interesting gossip about you and pretty boy over there.~" Tara says with a coy look in her eye. "Oh God, pen told you?!" She whisper-yells. The last thing she needed was people teasing her about something that will most likely never happen.

"Hey I'm not saying who told! But what I will say, is that if there anyone in this entire world who's into you, it's Spencer freakin Reid." Y/n's face heated up as she says his name. "Tara! Shut. Up!" She whispers in her face trying her best not to draw attention to them.

"I know you and Penelope just wanna make me feel better but please don't give me false hope. Please." Tara felt a little bad. Y/n has a lot of insecurities built up. She's tried very hard to keep it under control, however those horrible image problems tend to creep up from time to time. Especially when she develops feelings for someone.

Spencer sees Tara and Y/n talking, seeing y/n blush up and Tara and give her a knowing smile. The curious cat he is, walks up close to them to see exactly what's going on. Trying to be sneaky, he doesn't announce he's on his way. If there's something that makes y/n blush like that, he really wants to know.

Pretending to blend in and work on files closer, Spencers ears perk up at his name being said. "I don't understand why you don't just tell Spencer. He likes you back! We all see it, why cant you?" Tell him what? Likes her back? Was it really that obvious? And if it was why hasn't y/n said anything?

"Because there's nothing to see, Tara. I love you guys but please stop telling me stuff that isn't true. I'm not his type. I'm chunky and loud and inappropriate. I don't read a lot of books, I play guitar. Why on earth would someone as smart and intellectual as Spencer fall for someone dull and weird like me?"

Now Spencer was invested. How he not fall for someone like her? Everyone he's been with before let him down or broke his heart. Y/n was different. She runs around his mind daily, her smile, her curves, her laugh and personality. Everything about her makes him weak in the knees. How could someone so beautiful inside and out think something so bad about themselves?

"Y/n..." Tara had no idea her friends insecurities went this deep. However before she could console y/n, JJ speaks up bringing forth yet another case.

-----

A week and a half later. This case went as well as any case can. It ended with the unsub behind bars for life, yes, but not without victims under his belt. It had been particularly brutal, involving naive young women in high school looking to fit in. You could say it hit the women in the BAU harder than the fellas. Every girl in the world knows how hard it is to find yourself, especially in high school.

On the jet ride back everyone was doing their own thing. Luke and Tara talking about the case, JJ texting Will on her phone, Emily fell asleep at the table, and y/n had her earphones in listening to one of her favorite songs.

Spencer on the other hand was trying (key word trying) to read his book. However all that filled his mind was Y/n. He's barely had a chance to speak with her during the case, Emily keeping everyone busy. It was a blessing in disguise, truth be told. It gave him time to think of what needed to be said to her. He realized she deserved to know the truth of his feelings for her. It was decided that he was going to tell her as soon as possible.

After a painfully long ride back to Quantico, everyone bid their farewells to each other, Emily saying not to come in tomorrow. Spencer figured it was good a time as any to talk with y/n.

"Do you want me to walk you to your car?" It was a good first line, a good opening. Of course, Y/n could never say no to him. "Sure, that sounds great actually." They both grabbed their things and headed out.

The walk to her car was quiet, but peaceful. It was never tense or weird with Spencer, she always felt safe and happy just being in his presence. "I could give you a ride home if you'd like. The subway wouldn't be safe this late." She took a risk by asking him. If they were alone in the car together she wouldn't be able to control herself.

"I'd like that a lot actually. Thank you." This is perfect. He can have a one on one with her, be as upfront as possible. "Great, let's go then!" She remained calm on the outside. However inside she was a fucking mess. Why she was so nervous, she couldn't say. And that just made it worse.

When they finally pulled up to spencers apartment, he knew he had to take this moment for all its worth. "You can come up if you'd want. I know nights right after a case is hard on everyone.." Hes nervous and worried he may have crossed a line, but again, Y/n could never say no to him. With a smile, she responds. "I'd love to."

Once finally up, Spencer closes the door behind them. "Would you like some tea or water?" Grateful for something in her system, she accepts the tea and sits on his couch. His home is exactly like she'd imagined. Full of books and artifacts. No tv, she's not surprised. He's always prefer reading rather than watching.

Sitting down next to her with his own cup of tea, he figured it was now or never. "I uh.. I have to talk to you about something."

Her mind starts racing with a million thoughts, but she puts on a brave face and urges him to go on.

"I heard you and Tara talking the other day. And I know how... How you feel about me."

At that point her whole world turns upside down. He heard? She should've paid more attention! Why? How could she be so stupid?! What in the world was she thinking??

She took a deep shaky breath, "So you heard.. Everything?" The air in the room was thick and quiet, Y/n's anxieties growing by the minute.

"I did.. And I need you to know that you're wrong. About it all. I do feel the same, I wouldn't want anyone else. You're perfect for me, y/n. You deserve to know that." At this point Y/n was now up on her feet.

"No no no no... You're lying. Spencer I'm nothing like the women who get your attention. I'm not JJ or Lila.. I'm not Max... Or Maeve... I'm not smart or petite. I'm just... Me." All the insecurities she'd built up, all the nights she lost sleep staying up fantasizing about what will never be.

Spencer could feel his heart breaking with each word that comes out of her mouth. How can someone so beautifully wonderful think something so wrong about themselves?

"Y/n... Please stop telling yourself those lies." He stood up and grabbed her hands. "If there's any word to describe you, it'd be perfect. You're beautiful, inside and out. You don't judge me when I ramble about nonsense and you actually listen to the facts I have to say. You're absolutely stunning, you make me laugh and smile no matter how hard my day was. You're the one thing I look forward to when I walk into the bull pen every morning. You deserve to see what I see: a beautiful woman that I would literally do anything for."

Words caught in y/ns throat. A few tears slipped down her cheek and Spencer leaned in to wipe it away with his thumb. "If you'll allow me... I'd love to prove to you just how amazing you are."

By now they were centimetres apart. Y/n could feel his breath on her lips. Lips that he'd been dying to kiss since the moment they met.

"I'd really love that.." Their lips met for the first time. Finally, Spencer got to feel her this close to him. All those times fantasizing on the jet is nothing compared to the real deal.

When they separated, Spencer leaned his forehead against hers, stroking her still damp cheek with his hand. "You're everything to me. And I will gladly spend the rest of my days proving it." With that, Y/n leaned in again, promising the same to him.

------------------

I'm so sorry this took a fucking lifetime. I just started a new job! And with Christmas around the corner it's very stressful. Not to mention I'm a mother and a wife 🤭

Please tell me how I did! And also feel free to send in requests via private message or an ask! 🥰🥰🥰