#So I just try to power through because otherwise I'll get stuck and forget. Maybe it's both?

[trans-soapberry]

post. Post-posting clarity where you're like "wtf was I talking about". But also post-posting confusion where you're also like "wtf was I talking about" but it's less about your mental state While Posting and more about "okay. I've written many words. I remember. Approximately 20% of them. What the fuck are the rest of these?"

[theflowerofthecommonwealth]

Power Armor Punch Part Twenty Eight

Masterlist

Nick: That doesn't necessarily make you an adult and besides... *gently rubs her back* Just because you're a kid doesn't mean people have the right to disrespect you or your agency. You deserve the same amount of regard of any level headed adult out there in Wasteland, got it?

Jasmine: (Nods her head against his coat, although she believes otherwise on the first part...) “Fucking hell…” (She quietly curses to herself out loud for bringing THAT up, she was trying to forget it ever happened… Alright. Unless she wants to go on another rant about being too pretty and shit like that, she needs to think about something else…)

Nick: Breathe, kiddo. It won't do you any good getting stuck in your own head again...

Lucille: *doing repairs on the other robots. Edgar got a rock lodged in his chasis again. Poe needed a few weapon upgrades. Allan kept complaining about a whine in his eye stalk. Atlas... well, Atlas wants actual hands and just kept pestering her. Ada got stuck in a "Are you ready to depart" loop*

Geneveve: *has been trying to get the right flavor ratio down for HOURS. She really needs a good taste tester and she isn't getting concise results. Honestly she's getting a bit frustrated*

Jasmine: (Takes in a some deep breaths, still swearing quietly at herself but she isn't going into panic mode or getting lost in her mind… One of her hands grabs onto Nicks, gently squeezing it)

Nick: ...Do you feel well enough to take a walk through the halls, maybe take a leak? You've been cooped up in here for quite a long time.

Jasmine: (Pulls back from him a bit and nods her head. She really hates it in here) (Quietly) “Can I change this?” (Gesturing to the hospital gown that doesn't give her much coverage or security for her standards)

Nick: Of course... Just let me go get you a change of clothes from the office.

Dogmeat: *perks his head up from next to her bed*

Nick: And you have Dogmeat here to keep you comfortable if you start feeling a bit antsy.

Dogmeat: *quiet woof*

Jasmine: (Nods her head. She lets go of Nicks hand to pat next to her for the pup to come on up on the bed)

Nick: *scoots himself off the bed*

Dogmeat: *hops up and takes his place and licks her face*

Nick: I'll be back, shortly, kiddo... *leaves*

Jasmine: (Hums in response before giggling at the pups kisses. She gently strokes the pooch behind the ears, cooing at him sweetly with a smile and a kiss)

Nick: *runs to the agency and goes through Lucille's stash of clothes. He pulls out a blouse and a pair of pants that looks her size. He looks at the Shroud outfit and then his bloody coat and shirt. He undresses and redresses quickly, shoes and all. He even wears the hat* Better. Much much better. *runs back to the hospital*

Jasmine: (Humming a tune to Dogmeat, playing with his ears as she stares into his puppy eyes to keep herself distracted)

Dogmeat: *soft woof and pants*

Nick: *Knocks on the door* It's Nick.

Jasmine: (Leans over and knocks on the wall in response because she might not be loud enough if she uses her voice. Its actually still a little sore from her screaming and crying earlier)

Nick: *comes in with the clothes, putting everything on the chair for her* I'll leave the room for a bit so you can have your privacy. That alright with you?

Jasmine: (Nods her head, already sitting upright. She pauses and looks down at herself with a deep breath, biting her tongue) (Signing) “Don't leave me for too long, Im still thinking about it…” (Runs her hands over the stitches through the dress, half afraid that she will see the bandages and break again)

Nick: Or I could just turn around... keep you stable.

Jasmine: (Pulls her hand away from herself, looking at the clothes on the chair) (Quietly) “Yeah, that might be best.” (They cant really risk taking any chances with herself right now…)

Nick: *turns and stands with his back to her* Pull on my coat if you feel like you're going to start scratching your wounds...

Jasmine: (Quietly) “Okay…” (Grabs the new clothes off the chair and places them besides her on the bed. Normally, she would be very fast at switching out her clothes, but now she has to move slowly as not to hurt herself) (She dangles her legs off the side of the bed then gently and slowly lifts off the gown, tossing it aside. She freezes and stares blankly at the bandages that are wrapped around her body tightly, letting out a choked sigh)

Nick: *pulls out a screw driver and starts tinkering with his right hand. Hopefully he doesn't have to stop her*

Jasmine: (Shakes her head to push away THOSE thoughts. She snatches the undergarments and shoves them on quickly over the bandages, letting out a small hiss of pain from the fast movements. Just have to get this over with….)

Nick: *concerned* You okay?

Jasmine: (Leans back with one arm supporting her on the bed, the other wrapped around her waist as she reels slightly from the pain) (Shakily) “Y-yeah…” (Glances at the rest of the clothes)

Nick: You don't sound like it...

Jasmine: (Shakily, her voice breaking) “I am… fine…” (She looks back down at her chest bandages, then her lower ones with a small hitched breath. Uh oh… Her hand is absently already picking at her waist bandages… Shit) (Clutches the pants with her other shaking hand, afraid to move)

Nick: *spins on his heel and grabs her hands. Slightly irritably* Stop that, Rosalinda...

Jasmine: (Snaps out of the trance she was falling in with a suprised noise, her wrists twisting a little but she stops after a moment) (Whispering to herself) “Bloody hell…” (Her eyes are still casted down at the bandages as she sucks in a breath. Well THAT didn't last long….)

Nick: *firmly while glaring at her* Don't.

Jasmine: (Slowly lifts her head to look straight back at him, blinking a few times and remaining still)

Nick: It won't help you. You're just continuing a vicious cycle.

Jasmine: (Sighs, tilting her head down at herself) (Quietly) “I am trying… sorry.” (Looks at the shirt by her side. It was such a simple task…)

Nick: *picks up the long sleeved light blue blouse* Need help...?

Jasmine: (Nods her head, feeling ashamed that she is even asking)

Nick: *helps slip it over her head*

Jasmine: (Carefully moves her arms to guide them into the sleeves, this time taking care not to hurt herself) (Softly) “Thank you….”

Nick: Of course doll... *pulls it down a little to help add some support as she pulls her arms through.

Jasmine: (Gives Nick a glance as she starts to smooth out and fix the bandages that are now under her shirt, her fingers being very stiff. She then snatches the pair of pants and gently starts sliding them on, having to stand up a bit)

Nick: What's the look for??

Jasmine: (Quietly, looking down) “I am reminding myself not to scratch…” (Holds onto the bed for support as she puts on the pair of pants, her legs being wobbly)

Nick: Please don't...

Jasmine: (Finishes dressing herself and sits back on the bed, going back to smoothing out the bandages so her clothes are almost seamless) (Signing) “Im trying.”

Nick: I appreciate it...

Jasmine: (Nods her head and turns back to face Nick, finally realizing that he is now dressed as the Silver Shroud, making her smile a bit) (Quietly) “You are right. It does suit you well.” (Folds her hands in her lap)

Nick: Hm? *looks down* Oh this little number? *smiles thoughtfully as he looks back up at her* ...I suppose it does!

Jasmine: (Nods her head again with a small chuckle, strapping her Pip-Boy to her arm)

Nick: All set? *smiles*

Jasmine: (Quietly) “Yes...” (Stands up and gently starts shaking out her legs while holding onto the bed. She honestly cant wait to leave this hospital room, as the many attempts at escaping explained itself. It was just too much of a constant reminder of all the hell she crawled through…)

Nick: Before we go... *already sounds so tired of what's to come* Just promise me you won't try to run or fight me when it's time to come back...?

Jasmine: (Clicks her tongue, thinking it over carefully with a tilted head) (Signing) “Again, I cant fully promise that, just promise that I will try my hardest. I don't think I will runaway unless something bad or triggering happens, someone will end up catching me in this state anyways.” (Gives Nick an apologetic look, feeling bad that she is such a handful. Its part of her survival instinct to avoid places like this, so she wont say that there will not be some protesting. And its not like she can just turn it off for the day and ignore the years of trauma)

Nick: ...If you promise to tell me when you feel like hurting yourself I can try to arrange with Curie to clear you to leave. Can you at least do that?

Jasmine: (Sighs, putting a hand to her hip) (Signing) “Yes. But there is a good chance I wont be able to make myself move or call out to you if I distance myself.”

Nick: Then I suggest you don't. Can you do that?

Jasmine: (Shifting her weight on her footing) (Signing) “Another I will try my very hardest, cant be glued to your side and Im trained to be a lone wolf. Actually, I might not be even able to tell you directly that I want to or are hurting myself, hiding weakness from other people and all…”

Nick: Well I can't patch you up every time you nearly scratch yourself to death, kid. Hell, I'm not sure I can get to you on time if you do it again.

Jasmine: (Bites her tongue, looking down at herself) (Signing) “I actually feel really guilty for doing this… I actually want to take it back for the first time in awhile. So I mean it when I say I will try, because I love you.”

Nick: Then why do it at all...? It hurts to see you constantly destroy yourself this way... I feel like Sisyphus pushing a boulder up hill until it inevitably rolls back down.

Jasmine: (Shrugs her shoulders, glancing down and lifting the neckline of her blouse to glance in at the bandages) (Signing) “I don't understand why I do it, maybe in self hatred or an attempt to blind out the OTHER pains. Hate to say it but it works for both with me. But I do know that I actually don't want to die when I am not having an episode. Im sorry I am like this….” (Grips her wrists again, leaning a little on the wall)

Nick: Does it really work...? From my angle it doesn't seem so.

Jasmine: (Shrugs again. She doesn't really have a clear answer, just that doing it takes off a heavy weight in her. No doubt that it isn't a healthy thing to be doing…) (Signing) “It kept me from knocking out a few peoples teeth.”

Nick: And yet, it only reminds you of the pain you endured. *sighs* Once we leave this room, it seems there's no stopping ya... so you better think long and hard about how you want to handle yourself.

Jasmine: (Signing) “Im trying my very best. It’s the reason I didn't go completely crazy on myself when I first left the Vault or when everyone ended up dead.” (Quietly to herself) “They encouraged this….” (Shakes her head. She just wants to leave this room already) (Signing) “I will let you know if I want to hurt myself, and I’ll tell you if I somehow already did.”

Nick: *walks over and picks up the key card* I suppose that will have to do... *goes to the door and pulls it open*

Jasmine: (Walks to the door after him, her footing and coordination being a little wobbly and off) “……..” (Glares at the keycard, holding onto the door frame while resting a hand on her hip)

Nick: *puts it in his pocket* It's not going to hurt you, now.

Jasmine: (Tilts her head, taking a few steps out of the room) (Quietly) “I would not be surprised...” (Quickly glances up and down the halls to check her surroundings)

Dogmeat: *dutifully follows them, tail wagging*

The hall: *empty except for a few medical equipment. There aren't many people about, yet in the Vault in general*

Jasmine: (Keeps herself close to the wall, feeling a bit woozy from, well, everything that has happened to her. Blood loss being the big one. She turns back and looks at Nick, waiting because she has no idea where they are going)

Nick: Need some support...? *extends his arm*

Jasmine: (Hesitantly looks at him, stepping closer. Something is still screaming at her not to take so much help. She knows she can walk around after losing most of her blood anyways)

Nick: I'm not going to hurt you...

Jasmine: (Quietly) “I know… Dad. It is just hard for me to ask.” (Reaching for his arm)

Nick: *steps a bit closer so she can take it* You need the help... I'm giving it.

Jasmine: (Takes his arm and links it with hers for support while holding his hand. She leans in a little closer, glancing up at him) (Whispering softly and slowly) “They made me walk alone after fighting. I would be half alive, bleeding, and barely moving… “Help yourself.” Was all they said.” (Looks down at herself, sucking in a breath. She would explain further if she could talk more. If she had asked someone to help her back then, it would most likely end up with a slap or stick to the head)

Nick: I would never do that to you, kid... I'm a synth, not a monster. *walks her down the hall, trying to keep her steady*

Jasmine: (Nods her head as she lets Nick lead her) (Softly) “I know, I trust you.” (Squeezes his hand a bit)

Nick: Do ya, now...? *smiling down at her*

Jasmine: (Nods her head again) (Quietly) “Yes. That is why I did not scream when you helped clean me up then dressed me. You are not going to hurt me.” (Gives Nick a look. Did he not understand just how much she trusted him? She lets herself be more of a kid in front of him and she lets him near when she is vulnerable)

Nick: *just nods*

Jasmine: (Lifts up her other arm to check her Pipboy for the time, clicking her tongue as she walks)

Nick: Y'know, most clients only trust me to a certain extent. Not as much as you or Lucille, though. Still trying to wrap my head around that...

Jasmine: (Looks up at Nick from her Pip-Boy with her childlike eyes, blinking a few times as she tries not to stumble her footing. Its a little hard to walk while focused on something else, so she is grateful for Nicks help)

Nick: And Ellie, the sweet girl, always worrying about me... What would I do without people like any of you...? *pauses for a moment realizing the mortality of the people he cares for- he'll lose them one by one until he's finally alone with just their fading memories to keep him company*

Lucille: *actually taking a nap in the agency. Dealing with her robots finally tired her out*

Jasmine: (Tilts her head with worry at his sudden pause, gently squeezing his hand and tugs on his arm) (Quietly) “What is wrong?”

Nick: The thought of one day being alone again and forgetting the people I care about. *shakes his head with a sad smile* Hopefully that'll be a long time coming...

Jasmine: (Leans her head on his shoulder, her eyes getting a bit teary) (Softly) “Yeah, hopefully…” (Bites her tongue at the reminder of something. She hasn't seemed to age even a bit since she left the Vault….)

@lucilleandherrobots

[sainadazai]

When your crush is angry all the time

Ch.4

I wanna be an intern too, you ragedy ann looking ass hoe 😠



Y/n pov

°•○●○•°•○●○•°

All goes well when you are ignorant is what my dear best friend would say to me now, as I sit in the very back of the class unfocused on how our teacher is introducing an activity I have no chance of participating in. All I knew was that when Mr. Aizawa walked up to the board and wrote names of people getting offers, I wasn't one of them. Not that I expected to be, considering I wasn't in the sports festival, let alone the school at all back then. 

However, I did notice a small inconsistency in the order of the most offers. I was pretty sure that boom boom had gotten first place in the festival, him being there is what convinced me to transfer, but his name was actually second on the board. 

Todoroki had taken the place of first as far as offers were concerned. Todoroki the nice boy who I used to meet when I snuck away from my fucking prison cell. Call me privileged for complaining about living in a mansion All my life, but I much prefer being here. With common folk. They ground me. 

I peeked up from my phone at the red and white head of hair in front of me, he didn't seem all that fazed. Although maybe it was just the lack of seeing his face that made me believe he couldn't care less about all but one of those offers. Still, his business is his, and my business is the new Ao3 update on my favorite chrollo lucilfer fanfiction. What a babe. 

I decided that the class as of right now would be of no importance to me, considering I will have no offers, and bakugou-the reason I came here- hates me like I'm a piece of gum stuck under his shoe.  Through that conclusion I allowed myself to dissolve into the world of hxh and forget about how boring this world is. 

Could my power beat Killua or go in a fight? I mean, it doesn't enhance my strength like they did trying to get into Killua's house so physically they must be stronger. 

"Y/n! Is there something you would like to share with the class?"

Mr.Aizawas voice seemed almost shot at me as my gaze rose from my phone in my lap to meet him at the front of the room. He looked displeased to say the least. Well good for him, im displeased too, I might not be able to beat a fucking twelve year old in combat. 

"Huh?"

"You were grumbling, what's so important you had to tell us, hm?"

I thought it through for a second- just kidding, I never think anything through. 

"Oh, well I wasn't sure if I could beat Gon in a fight, but I'm not coming to the realization that if Chrollo is my boyfriend, I shouldn't have to fight anyone at all. I can just be a pretty face in the backgrounds and then after he wins for me i'll suck his-"

"Enough, y/n." Mr.Aizawa no longer held a tired looking face, his eyes were wide and an uncomfortable cringed was set on his face. As I peered at the rest of the class many also had shocked eyes, but unlike our teacher, held faint blushes. 

Minus midoriya, his face was completely red and his eyes void of life. I must've killed him, huh. 

"Wait!"

In an attempt to regain some dignity, I tried to correct myself.

"I would....not suck his-?"

"Don't even say it, shitty princess !"

"Woah bakugou, you spoke to me on purpose!?"

"Shut up!"

"Hey, how come you call me princess, you like me or something?"

He growled at that, neither of us paying mind to the fact that everyone in the class was either dead from nosebleeds or extremely uncomfortable and staring at us.  

"Its cuz you act fucking entitled like a princess"

"I'll be your pillow princes-"

"Enough!" A robotic-like hand sliced the air in front of me. The voice sounded firm, almost more teacher-like than our teacher's voice. I followed my gaze up the hand, not failing to notice how as I drew up the guy's arm his muscles only seemed to get bigger and bigger and- iida? 

"Oh class rep-"

"Y/n this vulgar language and border-line harassment needs to cease immediately. I will not tolerante overtly sexual language and acts in this class-"

As he was speaking I noticed something ironic about the situation. If everyone here didn't like sexual jokes or banter, how were they so flustered at comments that objectively should be unknown to them. 

"How did you know what I meant, iida?" I rasped in a low sultry voice, allowing my fingers to dance up his arm starting at the wrist in front of my face. 

I heard a few chuckles from, who I would say are the only two people enjoying this situation: kaminari and...stinky mineta. Iida's face grew more red than previously and the arms in front of me began shaking. 

"Mr.Aizawa it seems I've disarmed the robot. Is there a restart button or something?" I question with a serious face using the search as an excuse to wonder my eyes all over his body. Perverted? Yes. Rightfully attracted to this giant hunk of a nerd. Yes ×10. 

"No, there is not." Todoroki, who was in front of me, finally turned around to address me. I guess he was unfazed by my words. Looks like someone here can be cool. Whether he is okay because he is more comfortable with sexual jokes, or because he has yet to pick up on them, its nice that somebody in here can still function. Otherwise, I'd feel like a nuisance. 

"Y/n I'm not really sure how to- let's just say to have detention with your m- midnight. Detention. Yeah." Aizawa publicly convinced himself of my punishment? 

"Okay"

"Now, back to this, even if you didn't get any offers ALL of you will have an internship" 

And so went on the class, kids chose their hero names, not me though. I wasn't even sure I wanted to be a hero at all, this was just a little less boring and sad than the way I lived before. This school had people who laughed in joy, not just to mask the pain. That was the real benefit, not being a hero, or being strong. Likely no one here realized that there were many places where none of this joy was possible. 

Some of the kids in class gave me suggestions for a hero name, but I didn't like them anyway. They lacked personality, and while I have many adjectives to describe my personality, my life, none of them are all that heroic. 

"Dark element"

"Girl who will die if her quirk doesnt like its environment" 

See, I'm not the best at this. Even bakugan names had some sense to it...well no. I'd say we're about the same, but still. Ugh. 

~timeskip~ 

Bakugou pov 😠

She came up with no hero names. Fucking entitled brat. Everyone at this lunch table seems to have no problem with the fact that she is here, just happy to have another pair of tits to stare at like perverts. Their gross. I bet she doesn't even want to be a hero, she sure as hell doesn't act like it. We don't even know what her whole quirk is. Ive seen her do that plant shit a couple times, fucking with flowers or whatever. Still, there's more to it. Something we don't know, at least. Cuz in the middle of class she gets up and whispers to Aizawa and he just lets her go. Where the fuck does she go? 

Interrupts class, got into the school because her moms a teacher, won't use her quirk. What a nuisance, I can't believe she is not expelled yet. Plus those bullshit sex jokes are so shitty. She is obviously faking something when she does them. Not like midnight, who always at least seems like she means that gross shit. 

"Hey, who did you guys choose for your internship? I haven't chosen yet."

"The number three hero guy," I spoke, knowing I'm the only person here who already chose. 

"Really? Best jeanist! That's so cool, but are you sure that for you bakugou?" Shitty hair raised a shitty brow at me. 

"What the hell is that supposed to mean!?"

"Just that he seems pretty...uptight..for you?" Dunceface added, but he spoke like it was a question. Of course he is the hero for me, he is the highest ranting hero on my list. If I wanna be number one, I gotta train with the best. 

If I go to his agency I'm sure there will be a lot more action, since he is so high ranking. Then i'll get some real experience kicking villain ass, well, other than the USJ. 

"Of course he is the right option!"

"Woahhh~"

Shit. It's her voice. I honestly should applaud her for using it less often around me but, how can one small girl be so goddamn annoying. I don't even know what she has to say and I already wish she would just put a sock in it. How can someone so entitled like her, probably never had to lift a finger, walk  over here and talk like she has something to say. 

"You're working with the best jeanist! So cool, one time he saved me from a group of rapist guys, it was awesome with all these strings everywhere and I could only see half of his face. Oh and he had goofy hair too!"

Oh. I didn't really know how to respond to the girl who looked so excited about almost being violated. Another thing wrong with her? I looked back at the other people at the table to see if they knew how to respond to something like that. 

Dunceface was frozen, tape arms were frozen, shitty hair was frozen, and alíen eyes were looking like a lost puppy and trying not to cry. 

It didnt seem like the shutty princess was exactly understanding how what she just yelled was making things weird. She just stood there expectantly. She kinda looked like she thought being raped was something that must happen to everyone. Did she think that? Wouldn't put it past her weird ass. 

"Uhm...anyways, i'm sure you'll do awesome, he likes to put boys in tight jeans. Wish I could intern too, I'd love to see that boom boom~" she winked. 

A perverted joke...and then she had the audacity to wink at me. 

"You wish you could see me in tight jeans, shitty extra!"

"I know...thats what a I just said." She dead panned, blinking a couple times at me. 

"Tch, screw you!"

"I would-" 

"Can it, i don't wanna hear your shitty voice anymore"

The girl stopped herself after my words, pushing all her hair behind her head, except for the two blond stands in the front. 

(You don't have to acknowledge these if you don't want, but I made it so that they change color depending on what element your using and I thought it was hot*if you have short hair, then you just got a lil nishinoya type thing 🥰)

Lifted her obnoxious hands that moved around while she talked and made a zipper-like motion over her lips. Then she just stood there looking at me. I really wanted to just let her stand there and go back to eating. Ignore her completely and let her hope fizzle out and die or something like that. 

Yet here I am, still looking at her. Silently. Wishing she made a stupid joke so that I could stop flickering between those images I'd seen of her dancing. How even though ballet is a princess fucking dance, the pictures felt nice. Like if I was watching it live I would probably be unable to criticize it. That pissed me off, because I want to hate everything about her, but I can't hate those photos. Where she looks like she is flying, without any need for a quirk.

I see her in that weird gown, and now, in the UA uniform. I see her looking respectable, formal, and serious. Then I see her stupid little smirk as she takes pride in being able to shut up for more than a minute. 

"Why are you still standing there?"

Instead of answering, she took her hand up again, made a pinch with her fingers and unzipped her mouth. 

"I was enjoying the look in your eyes."she smiled. 

The look in my eyes? Could she tell I was seeing two different people? What the hell does that even mean? Even said it without that shitty flirt voice. Like she meant it. 

"You tryna make fun of me?"I stood up from the table to get in her face.

"Not right now, maybe later, I gotta do something." She smiled sincerely at me, for a second as she walked away, I forgot about how this conversation started. What a wierd fucking girl. I'll never respect her as a hero. Tch. (Yes, its canon he tchs even in his thoughts) 

3rd person POV 

Y/n briskly walked out of the cafeteria with a new goal in mind. She would come to remember how maybe being oblivious was a benefit in some ways, but for now, she had a clear plan .

"Mr.Aizawa, let me do an internship."

"You weren't in the festival, I can't just hand you to a hero who has no idea what you can do, y/n."

"Well, you know what I can do, right?"

"No. I'm not doing internships. Stop asking."

"That's not what I meant! You can just tell them, or I could, it's not that hard to explain. Just say i'm all- powerful or some play on words like 'she's got all the right elements' hehe, see how i mimicked your voice there?" Y/n grinned like a child. She was proud of herself. 

"No. Still not happening."

"I wanna be an intern too, you raggedy ann looking ass hoe" 

"Y/n, it doesn't make sense, insulting me to get what you want?"

"Maybe it doesn't, but I bet you feel real insecure about your hair right now."

"You already have detention, what more do you want!"

"An internship, I wanna do one with kamui Woods, I have a good reason, too. As far as my quirk control, i'm the weakest with earth, the aspect that allows me to grow and manipulate plants and stuff. That's why I've only been using that part of it all month. Im trying to get her up to speed so I can start using all four at once. He is like a tres guy, right? He manipulates earth all day long. He could teach me a lot, and that aspect of my quirk would suit his well. Please!?!?!?"

If the girl had just asked again in a normal way, his answer would have been the same. However Aizawa was taken aback to hear how much thought she put into this. From the stories of the teachers lounge, he came to understand her big life goal, was to rely fully on a rich man or woman, and do nothing at all forever. Just to try and forget about the terrible life she was destined to have because of that quirk.

This side of her was something he could not even her mother had seen, and it prompted him to speak those words she wanted to hear so badly.

"Fine." 

[hippityhoppityyourenowmyproperty]

Reset!Rant (part 5)

Gemini Ascendant

Chapter: 1

Max: "Are they always like this?" Helen nodded and turned the page of her bodice-buster romance novel. "This is the status quo for them. Bart gets bored. Bart annoys Thad. Thad overreacts. Chaos, followed by a scuffle in the back yard. Boys come in dirty and exhausted. Repeat."

She forgot to mention the part about Thad abusing Bart and being the one who insults him. And getting murderous thoughts and viciously beating Bart up is something a little more inexcusable than just overreacting, as Helen puts it.

Thad stared at his costume that he still held in his hands. "I don't think this is going to fit, either." At least Bart was good for making the embarrassing mistakes first, so he didn't have to.

Sums up pretty well all that Thad sees in him. Because despite proving his worth and helping out numerous times in this story, Thad still refuses to acknowledge how essential Bart was to the mission and how helpful he can be.

Thad was not letting go of the subject. "You used to just cook out of box or can, too," He accused Bart. "Well yeah, but I leveled up." He stuck his tongue out at his brother. Thad's arm shot out and he grabbed Bart's tongue, eliciting a yelp of surprise.

This is another one of those scenes that is creepy and makes me feel very uncomfortable. This is a physical threat and it's aking towards physical abuse. Bart is playfully teasing him, and Thad sees that as such a big threat to his position of power that he feels the need to physically intimidate him and maybe even elicit pain. His actions aren't justified. They're not okay.

Thad complied and Max sighed. "Can't you two keep your hands to yourself for one day?"

Can't any of you see that Thad is always the one who starts fights and gets physical first? If you want to stop their fights, then maybe start by punishing the one who starts them.

Chapter: 2

"It's your own fault that they don't like you." Thad ducked a flying shirt and smirked at Bart's angry glower. "You let your nature get the better of you." Without lowering his chin, he sneered down at his twin. "You always do."

Weird, I could've sworn that you were the one who wasn't able to control his angry outbursts one chapter ago and tried to hurt Bart because he was teasing you. You're the one who resorts to abusing Bart because you can't control your anger, so get off his back for being impulsive. He's better at not letting his impulses control himself than you are, you're just too deluded to understand that. Impulsive anger is still impulsive.

Helen leaned against the counter and looked Thad in the eye. "He's a little excited right now, and we all know what happens when he's wound up like that. None of his friends can keep up with him if he gets too enthusiastic." Thad knelt down to rub Dox between his ears. "Fine, I'll babysit him."

Yeah, great idea Helen, give the person who's ripping on Bart and abusing him even more power over him, what could possibly go wrong? Isn't Bart the one who constantly had to stop Thad from doing stupid, reckless stuff because he was mad?

Max: "Do you see what I'm aiming for? Helen has done wonders in turning a potential Cain and Abel into Castor and Pollux. Now, we have to make sure that it sticks.

Sure, except for that Pollux actually loved his brother and gave up his immortality so that he could be with Castor, and that he wasn't an abusive jerk. Thad is the opposite of Pollux. He would never sacrifice something for Bart, he would let him die if it wasn't for Max. He's callous and toxic to Bart. Helen didn't make Thad less hostile towards Bart, if anything she encouraged his vile behavior. She doesn't deserve credit for this. Making sure that it sticks means that you are keeping up an abusive relationship. Max should work with Thad on his behavior if he really cared about Bart and their whole team dynamic.

Chapter: 3

Anita: "I remember us joking around that you couldn't be normal if you tried."

"Hey! I can too!" Bart glared at Thad, who was snickering at his expense. "Like you're any better." "I am", Thad replied with a grin. " I can fake being normal just as easily as I can fake being you. How else do you think I get through the day?" Bart ticked off the items on his fingers. "Picking on me, chatting with your internet girlfriend, playing with Dox..."

Thad really has a problem with self reflection in this. Then there's the immediately trying to embarrass Bart for his short comings, and saying that he's so much better than Bart. He's condescending as ever.

And not being able to fake being normal a.k.a. neurotypical is funny because..?

Thad braced against the wall and raised a golden eyebrow. "It doesn't look so much like he's joining it, as it seems more like he's owning it."

Kon's sudden frown and the telekinetic ejection of Bart was just the payoff he was looking for.

Because when Thad is in company of Bart's friends and therefore can't hurt Bart, he will try everything in his power to get them to hurt or humiliate Bart for him.

Bart: I don't get these guys. They don't act like zombies are supposed to. They're tearin' stuff up, yeah, but the're not biting people or eating brains." Thad leaned over Greta's sketchbook with his hands folded behind his back. "Then maybe they're not zombies, moron."

While casually calling him a moron (for the fifth time, by the way) Bart's friends are standing right next to him. They say nothing in response to Thad being an absolute dick to him.

Thad decided that he had enough of Greta play fashion designer and je hovered over Bart's shoulder to supervise the monitor. "Use the traffic cameras, idiot. You can follow the pseudo-zombies and extrapolate their path. Then you can tell your team where to head them up."

"I am using the traffic cameras!" Bart snapped back.

"You're not doing a very good job of it."

"Yeah? I don't see you doing this job!" Bart challenged.

Thad sneered down at him and countered, "I'm not part of your little team, and I wasn't asked to sit here."

This is the very definition of senseless criticizing and abuse that's disguised as advice. He's chewing Bart out for supposedly not doing a good job, but offers no help whatsoever. He's criticizing just because he can. He reigns Bart in for mistakes that don't even exist. Despite saying "You suck at this" He gives him no advice how to do it better. Imagine having to live with someone like that. Imagine having to listen to someone ripping on you for everything you did, even when there was nothing that you did wrong. There will always be something the abuser will be upset about, whether that thing exists or is just made up in order to be a reason to judge and criticizise the victim. Everything the victim does is somehow false.

As always, there's the put down directed at Bart's intelligence.

"He did," Thad grumbled. "I wish I could say that I had no obligation to save him, but I made a promise to Max that I would look after my idiot brother."

This confirms that Thad really would let Bart die and/or suffer right in front of him if Max wouldn't have told him to do otherwise. Also another put down.

Greta: "You're not moving very fast for a speedster saving his brother." Thad shrugged and kept his eyes on the monitot. "I'll let him dangle a bit just so he appreaciates my timely intervention more. Bart's a little dense." The last word came out with a derisive grimace.

He's risking Bart getting hurt or killed in a fight just so that Bart will learn to appreactiate his time more. Thad is the one who needs to learn to not take Bart's support for granted. He's the extremely demanding one who wants more than he deserves. In his eyes, Bart is a worthless idiot who needs to show more respect to him. And don't forget the insult. Thad wants everyone to understand how shitty Bart is because he has ADHD.

Conclusion

From the very start of their relationship Thad is a manipulative abuser who uses every opportunity he gets to ridicule and belittle Bart and continually wears his self esteem down. The lack of punishment Thad receives from his parental figuers for his damaging behavior not only turn Helen, Wally, Max and Jay into neglectful and borderline abusive guardians, but also lead to his toxic demeanor intensifying. The lack of indignance the characters show when faced with Thad very obviously and aggressively abusing Bart right in front of them makes it seem like abuse is something normal and acceptable, and not something that is contemptible and needs to have consequences. Moreover, the fanfiction is ableist in that it paints insults that are directly meant to degrade ND people for being mentally disabled (such as r*tard and shortbus) as harmless and appropriate swear words for that group of people. It is infuriating that so many people praise it as 'the best fanfic about Bart and Thad out there with the most accurate characterisations of them' when the mental torture he inflicts on Bart is objectively so plain obvious. I think I know why the readers of this work failed to recognize the maltreatment. Sibling abuse isn't as known as parental abuse is, and even more people deny that it exists. Many people excuse abusive behaviors in sibling relationships because they're under the false assumption that siblings can't be abusive. They're even harder to convince that it is abuse when the siblings are twins and don't have a significant difference in age and physical appearance. Abuse always includes a power imbalance, and you can definetly see that in Bart's and Thad's relationship. It starts in that Thad is chronologically and mentally way older than Bart. He is also more knowledgable and well versed in combat situations and fighting. Through the use of intimidation, put downs and threats Thad enhances that already existing imbalance and makes it easier for himself to abuse Bart.

This version of Thad is one of the most evil, reprehensible and crude monsters I had the misfortune of meeting in fiction. Living with someone like him is a nightmare and through the entire work I felt bad for Bart. Despite what this work is trying to make you belive, abuse is never justified, no matter who is the victim and who is the perpetrator.