#THIS ASK GETS POINTS FOR 1. USE OF THE WORD ''MINE'' THREE TIMES 2. BEING ANTI-CANON-LOVE-INTEREST 3. SHE CALLED ME HUNNY BUNNYY<3<3<3<3<3< | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

pankowcrumbs · 12 days ago

Text

The Babysitter X Will Poulter (Chapter 3)

MasterList

Will Poulter Masterlist

Chapter 3 Word Count: 7K

Plot: Will hires you to help out with his two twin boys as he is a single dad and you both fall in love along the way.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

The sun had long since dipped behind the trees, and Will’s backyard looked like a ghost of its earlier chaos. Half-deflated balloons clung to chairs. Wrappers littered the grass. A once-bustling bouncy castle now sagged with defeat in the corner.

Inside, the house was quiet. Too quiet the kind of silence that only follows a kid’s birthday party.

Upstairs, Alfie and Jack had finally passed out in a tangle of wrapping paper and sugar crashes. I’d helped Will carry them one by one to their beds, brushing cupcake crumbs off foreheads and whispering sleepy goodnights.

Now I stood in the kitchen barefoot, scraping the last of the pink icing from the countertop, still half-smiling at the image of Will pretending to be a velociraptor just to get ten kids to follow him to the snack table.

He appeared behind me without a sound, leaning against the doorway, arms crossed. There was icing on the corner of his shirt. A balloon string clung to his sock.

He looked so tired. And so content.

“Hey,” he said quietly.

“Hey,” I echoed, not turning yet, heart suddenly thudding.

A beat of silence passed, the kind where the air feels like it’s listening in.

“I meant it,” he said.

I turned then, wiping my hands on a towel. “Meant what?”

He smiled, slow and sure. “What I said earlier. About us.”

I blinked, nervous and aching. “You mean the very casual ‘five months’ announcement in front of the bouncy castle?”

He huffed a small laugh. “That’d be the one.”

I folded the towel in my hands. “I love you too, you know.”

His breath caught, just slightly, like he hadn’t let himself hope I’d say it so plainly. But then his eyes softened, and his shoulders dropped, and I watched the tension melt from his frame.

“But Will,” I added before he could speak again, “I can’t keep taking your money.”

He frowned, confused. “What?”

“For watching the boys. Doing pick-ups. Making lunches. All of it. I can’t take your money anymore. Not when I...when I love them. When I love you. It feels like I’m getting paid to care about people who already mean everything to me. It feels…” I hesitated, throat thick. “Performative.”

His brows furrowed. “But I don’t mind. If you still want it, if it makes you feel better”

“That’s the point,” I cut in, frustrated. “I don’t want it. But I don’t want to start resenting the fact that I’m doing everything I used to, just… unpaid now. Like I’m still the help, only now I’ve got feelings, too.”

The air crackled. The safe little bubble we’d built flickered like it might pop.

I dropped my eyes, heart racing. “Sorry. That came out wrong.”

Will moved before I could backpedal. Crossed the room in three long strides. His hands landed gently on my waist, anchoring me, grounding me.

“You done?” he asked softly.

I looked up, startled. “What?”

He dipped his head, brushed his lips against my forehead. My breath hitched. “Because I’d like to kiss you now. And you talk a lot when you’re nervous.”

I huffed, half-laugh, half-sob.

And then his mouth found mine.

Slow. Firm. Not rushed or desperate just true. Like every bit of the last few months the coffee cups, the late nights, the movie marathons, the hallway kisses had been leading here.

We sighed at the same time when we pulled away.

“Fine,” he murmured, resting his forehead against mine. “I won’t pay you anymore.”

I smiled faintly. “Good.”

“But I was serious,” he added. “About loving you. About this being real.”

I swallowed. “When did you know?”

He smiled like it was obvious. “That day when Alfie got sick, and I called you in a panic, and you showed up in fifteen minutes flat. But it was really when It was raining and you were at the hospital and you just ran to me and I remember thinking” He paused, voice rough. “That’s it. That’s the person I want running into storms for me. For them.”

Tears prickled at my eyes. “Will…”

He shrugged, brushing a hand along my cheek. “You don’t forget a moment like that.”

We stood there a while, quiet in the hum of the kitchen, still surrounded by remnants of birthday chaos.

“So…” I said softly. “What changes now?”

He exhaled. “I don’t know everything. But I know I want you here. As often as you want to be. Not to work. Just to be. With us.”

I nodded slowly. “That sounds… really good.”

“I’ll hire someone else,” he added quickly. “Another childcare person. I don’t want you to feel like you have to keep doing everything, just unpaid.”

I scrunched my nose. “No way. You’ll just fall in love with the next one.”

He laughed, pulling me in again. “Impossible.”

“Good,” I said, resting my head against his chest. “Because I don’t want anyone else doing it. I want to still do everything I do now. Make their lunches. Pick them up. Braid Alfie’s hair even when he says he doesn’t want it. I want that.”

He nodded, tucking me into his arms. “So no money. Just you. In our little family.”

I smiled against his shirt, heart so full it hurt. “Exactly.”

I found myself leaning tiredly against the kitchen counter, watching Will as he set two glasses down and poured wine.

He looked too good like that. Rolled sleeves, forearms flexing, cheeks still faintly flushed from the chaos of the day. He glanced up at me, eyes catching mine across the room. “You could stay,” he said casually, like he wasn’t holding his breath waiting for my answer.

I raised a brow. “You trying to convince me, Mr. Poulter?”

His smile curved slowly. “Maybe.”

“I don’t have a change of clothes.”

“You can borrow mine.”

“I have to be up early.”

“So do I.”

I tilted my head. “I’m going to need more convincing than that.”

That was all the permission he needed. His smile spread, and in the next second he’d crossed the room and swept me up into his arms, my laugh tumbling out before I could stop it.

“Will!” I squealed as he tossed me over his shoulder like I weighed nothing.

He was already carrying me through the hall, ignoring my playful kicks. “I warned you. I can be very persuasive when I need to be.”

“Oh, I’m so scared,” I teased, grinning against the back of his shoulder.

He kicked open the bedroom door and stepped in, walking straight to the bed where he gently set me down in the center like I was the most precious thing in the world.

Then he hovered above me, one hand on either side of my head, eyes locked on mine. “I want you to stay.”

His voice had lost the teasing edge it was soft now, vulnerable. And I felt it. Every bit of what he wasn’t saying. Every beat of his heart against my ribs like it belonged to me.

“I want to,” I whispered.

He kissed me then. A slow, unhurried kiss that deepened quickly, hunger rising between us like it had been simmering all night. His mouth moved to my jaw, then lower, warm breath against my neck as his hands slid beneath the hem of my shirt.

We didn’t rush. His fingers explored with intention, like he was relearning me all over again every shiver, every sigh, every place that made me gasp. I tugged at his shirt until it joined mine on the floor, and he groaned softly as my mouth found the warm skin over his collarbone, then lower still.

He laid back just enough to let me shift, my hand sliding over his stomach as I took the lead, tracing patterns over his skin with lips and tongue, until he was breathing raggedly, one hand twisted in the sheets and the other gripping my hip with quiet desperation.

And then he flipped us, pressing me into the mattress with a look so full of want it made my breath catch. He kissed his way down, slow and deliberate, until my back arched and my hands found the frame of his shoulders, clinging like he was the only real thing in the world.

When he came back up, hovering over me again, he pressed our foreheads together and whispered, “Tell me to stop if you want me to.”

“I don’t,” I breathed.

He kissed me again harder this time, filled with intent and then everything blurred, heat curling around us in waves as clothes disappeared and skin met skin. The room melted away. There was only the warmth of his body, the soft sound of our laughter quieting into sighs, and the silent exchange of love wrapped into every movement.

Later, as the moonlight poured across the sheets and his fingers trailed idle patterns across my back, I felt it again that quiet peace. That certainty.

That this him, the boys, this house this was home.

I woke to the soft rise and fall of Will’s chest beneath my cheek, his arm curled snug around my waist. His breathing was still slow, steady. Peaceful.

We hadn’t fallen asleep until well past midnight, limbs tangled, lips swollen from kisses, laughter echoing softly between the sheets. The house was quiet now, with only the faint chirping of morning birds outside the window.

Until

BANG.

The bedroom door burst open.

“DAAAAAD!” came the twin chorus of six-year-old chaos.

My eyes flew open just as two bodies launched onto the bed like cannonballs. Will groaned beside me, rolling halfway onto his side as Jack landed squarely on his stomach and Alfie scrambled between us.

“What the” Will rasped, rubbing his eyes.

“Why is Y/N in your bed?” Jack asked immediately, tilting his head like a tiny detective who had just cracked a major case.

Alfie gasped, eyes wide with glee. “Did you have a sleepover?!”

I sat up, heart thundering, hair a mess, blanket clutched to my chest. “Um… good morning?”

Will tried and failed not to laugh.

Jack crawled up to my side, blinking at me. “But you usually leave after dinner. You don’t sleep here. Only Daddy sleeps here.”

Alfie nodded sagely. “Unless you’re married. Are you married now? Are we married now?”

Will finally sat up, his voice still rough with sleep. “Whoa, okay let’s not plan any weddings before breakfast.”

“Then why was she in your bed?” Jack pressed, clearly unconvinced.

Will grinned, running a hand through his hair. “Because sometimes, grown-ups like to have sleepovers too.”

“But why didn’t you tell us?” Alfie gasped, scandalised. “We would’ve brought our sleeping bags!”

That cracked me. I burst into laughter, which only made both boys grin wider.

Jack leaned in close. “Are you gonna sleep here every night now?”

I looked to Will, who met my gaze with that soft, fond look that made my chest ache.

“Maybe not every night,” I said, brushing Jack’s hair back gently. “But I wouldn’t mind staying over sometimes… if it’s okay with you two.”

They exchanged a glance, then nodded eagerly.

“As long as you make pancakes,” Alfie said firmly.

“With chocolate chips!” Jack added.

Will laughed, pulling both boys into a playful headlock. “Deal. But first let the adults wake up properly, yeah?”

Alfie stuck out his tongue. “You already woke up. You were cuddling.”

Jack gasped. “Were you kissing?!”

“Okay,” Will groaned, flopping back down on the bed dramatically. “That’s enough investigating for one morning.”

I leaned over and kissed Alfie’s head, then Jack’s, heart impossibly full. As chaotic as it was, this felt more like home than anything ever had.

The kitchen was warm with sunlight streaming in through the windows, the smell of pancakes and fresh coffee wrapping around all four of us like a hug. Jack stood on a stool near the counter, earnestly pouring chocolate chips into a bowl, occasionally sneaking a few into his mouth when he thought no one was looking.

Alfie was at the table, coloring a dragon in a book I’d brought over a few weeks ago. His tongue stuck out in concentration, cheeks smudged with what was either syrup or chocolate. Possibly both.

Will flipped a pancake with theatrical flair, then shot me a smug grin when it landed perfectly in the pan. “Still got it.”

I raised an eyebrow. “One decent flip and suddenly you’re Gordon Ramsay?”

“Hey, if Gordon had hair like mine, maybe he’d smile more.”

I snorted and turned back to the batter, pretending not to notice the way he bumped his hip against mine. But the touch lingered his hand brushing mine when I passed the spatula, the warmth of him beside me when we both leaned over to peek into the pan.

Jack suddenly called out, “Can we eat on the floor like a picnic?”

“Only if someone volunteers to clean it up after,” I teased.

Will held up his hands. “I vote yes, but not it.”

A few minutes later, the four of us were sitting cross-legged on the rug in the living room, plates balanced on cushions, the morning cartoons playing quietly in the background.

“I love this,” Alfie mumbled through a mouthful of pancake. “Can we do this every day?”

My chest squeezed. I caught Will’s eyes across the little makeshift breakfast camp and saw the same ache-soft smile forming on his face.

“Maybe not every day,” I said gently, “but… as often as we can.”

The boys were deep in conversation about which dragon would win in a fight the fire-breathing one or the ice one when Will stood, brushing off his hands and nodding toward the kitchen.

I followed him quietly, ducking back into the calm warmth of the room we’d cooked in minutes ago.

“Coffee refill?” he asked, already pouring me one before I could answer.

“Please.” I accepted it with a grateful smile, letting my fingers brush his as I took the mug.

For a moment, we just stood there, side by side, the low hum of the kettle and the distant giggles from the other room filling the quiet between us.

Then, without looking at me, he said, “This morning when they ran in and saw you I didn’t feel panicked.”

I blinked, turning slightly to face him. “You didn’t?”

Will shook his head. “I expected to. I thought I’d be scrambling for some kind of explanation. But I wasn’t. It just… felt right.”

I stared at him, heart tripping a little over itself.

“I know it’s messy,” he went on. “Us. The timing. Your job...was your job.”

I nodded slowly. “It is messy.”

“But also,” he said, glancing down at my hand as he slid his fingers through mine, “it’s good. And I don’t want to overthink something that feels this simple when it’s just… us.”

I squeezed his hand. “You make it really hard to be cautious, you know.”

His thumb brushed slow circles across my knuckles. “You make it really easy to fall in love.”

The words sat between us, soft and certain.

He leaned in and kissed me sweet and slow and full of everything we didn’t have the words for yet.

Then, from the living room

“EWWWW THEY’RE KISSINGGGG!”

We both burst out laughing.

Will pulled back just far enough to roll his eyes. “And there goes the moment.”

“Honestly?” I said, still giggling, “I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”

He looked back toward the living room, the boys now fake-gagging and falling over each other in laughter, and then at me.

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “Me neither.”

By the time I stepped inside Will’s house, my shoulders were screaming, my heels had been kicked off halfway through the drive, and all I wanted was to faceplant into the couch and pretend adulthood didn’t exist.

It was dark. Not “no one’s home” dark just… still. The kind of quiet that makes you instinctively lower your voice, even when you’re alone.

I blinked in the low light and noticed the note sitting on the table near the door, my name written across the front in unmistakable six-year-old handwriting.

Y/N follow the balloons!!! - Jack and Alfie

Sure enough, there they were little blue balloons taped to the floor, a winding trail leading up the stairs.

A tired smile tugged at my lips. I followed them, one by one, every aching muscle in my body temporarily forgotten as I climbed, heart thumping in a familiar, stupid way it always did when Will was up to something.

The trail ended outside his bedroom door, which was cracked open just enough for warm fairy lights to spill out in golden ribbons.

“Welcome to the show!” Alfie called from inside the room, and I peeked in to find both boys in collared shirts, grinning like tiny stage performers.

Will stepped out of the bathroom wearing a makeshift paper top hat and a red towel like a cape.

I burst out laughing, covering my mouth. “What on earth is happening?”

“I swear I didn’t put them up to this,” he said, feigning innocence.

“You wrote the script!” Jack shouted gleefully.

Will looked at me with that sheepish grin that always undid me. “Okay, maybe I helped.”

Alfie cleared his throat and held up a sheet of paper, reading in his best announcer voice. “Once upon a time, there was a very tired but very pretty girl named Y/N”

“who helped two small gremlins become slightly better-behaved gremlins,” Jack added with a toothy smile.

“and who made their dad smile more than he had in forever,” Alfie finished with a dramatic flair.

Then Jack lifted a cardboard sign over his head, his arms wobbling from the effort. In big, wobbly letters it read:

“WILL YOU BE OUR DAD’S GIRLFRIEND?”

I think my heart actually stopped.

Will stepped forward, out of his ridiculous costume, just… him. Soft-eyed, warm, beautiful.

“I know it’s been complicated,” he said, voice low. “But I don’t want it to be anymore. You’ve been in our lives in a hundred little ways for almost a year now and I can’t imagine a version of this house, or this life, that doesn’t have you in it.”

I blinked quickly. Too quickly.

“So,” he added, glancing at the boys. “What do you think?”

I dropped to my knees, wrapping Jack and Alfie in the biggest hug I could manage. “Yes,” I whispered into their hair, smiling so hard it hurt. “A hundred times yes.”

They screamed, obviously, and ran off shouting something about gummy worms and celebrations.

I stood again, and Will stepped in close, like I was gravity.

“You sure?” he asked, his hands warm on my waist.

“Even after today,” I breathed. “Even when I’m exhausted and grumpy.”

He smiled, resting his forehead against mine. “You’re the soft place I land.”

I reached up and kissed him slow and lingering, like all the unspoken things between us were finally, finally being allowed to breathe.

“You’re officially stuck with me now,” I murmured against his lips.

“Good,” I whispered, pulling him even closer. “Took you long enough.”

His arms wrapped fully around me, and I buried my face in his shoulder, completely undone.

“I really am the luckiest man in the world,” he said.

Will and I stood there for a while after the boys thundered out of the room, probably raiding the pantry for celebratory snacks and plotting sugar-fueled chaos.

His arms didn’t leave my waist.

I didn’t want them to.

He guided me gently toward the bed, both of us toeing off shoes and settling into the warm tangle of blankets. The fairy lights still glowed softly above us, casting flickers of gold across his face. One of his hands found mine, the other resting lightly on my hip.

“Tell me this isn’t a dream,” he whispered, barely louder than a breath.

“If it is,” I murmured, pressing my forehead to his collarbone, “don’t wake me up.”

He exhaled through a laugh, and I felt the sound ripple through his chest. His fingers toyed with mine tracing over my knuckles, memorising the shape of me like he hadn’t already done it a hundred times in smaller, quieter ways.

“You should’ve seen your face,” he said. “When they held up that sign. You looked like someone just handed you a puppy and a winning lottery ticket.”

“You basically did,” I smiled against him.

His hand stilled, then curled tighter around mine.

“I was scared,” he admitted. “To ask. To label it. I didn’t want to push.”

I leaned back just enough to look at him, brushing a finger through the hair at his temple. “Will… I’ve felt like yours for months. I was just scared too.”

His eyes searched mine like he was trying to etch this moment into memory. Then he kissed my forehead, slow and warm and full of all the things he wasn’t saying out loud.

I tucked myself into his side, my leg sliding between his as I got comfortable.

“Let’s stay here,” I said sleepily, letting my body melt into him. “Just like this. Forever.”

“I’d be okay with that,” he said, voice low and honest.

Outside the door, I could hear the boys arguing over who got the last gummy worm and which movie they were going to watch. I didn’t care. For once, the chaos didn’t pull me out of the moment.

Will tilted his head to press his cheek against the top of mine. “I know it’s cheesy, but… it’s always felt like home when you’re here.”

I closed my eyes. Let his words settle. Let my heart believe them.

Because this his hand in mine, the soft rumble of his voice in my ear, the shared breath and shared weight of the day this felt like home to me too.

And for the first time in a long time, I let myself stay.

I don’t think I’d ever seen Jack and Alfie pack so fast in their lives.

The moment Will told them we were going away for the weekend “all four of us,” he’d said, with a pointed glance and soft smile in my direction they were zipping around the house like mini hurricanes, shoving pyjamas, flashlights, and mismatched socks into their little backpacks.

Will caught my eye over Alfie’s head and mouthed, “Still time to run.”

I’d only grinned and mouthed back, “Never.”

The drive was noisy in the best way. Alfie insisted on DJ duty, which meant a lot of songs being changed after thirty seconds. Jack narrated every passing cow, bird, and oddly shaped cloud. Will reached across the console at one point, resting his hand lightly on my knee, his thumb brushing back and forth like he was grounding himself or me.

By the time we arrived, the cabin was bathed in late afternoon light, nestled between tall trees that whispered with the breeze. The lake glinted at the edge of the clearing, and Alfie immediately declared he was going to find Bigfoot.

Will glanced at me as we unpacked the car, both arms full of groceries and snack bags. “Remind me next time to bring a tranquiliser dart.”

I laughed. “You love it.”

“I do,” he said, simple and true.

Night one was chaos.

We roasted marshmallows. The boys got sticky to the point of being flammable. Jack somehow singed his eyebrows just slightly while trying to light a second marshmallow with his first. Will was equal parts horrified and impressed.

Later, we all huddled inside under a massive quilt on the cabin sofa, watching a nature documentary that Alfie picked entirely because “the frog had funny eyes.”

Jack fell asleep against my shoulder. Alfie crawled into Will’s lap halfway through.

And somewhere in the warmth of that room, I looked across at Will and he gave me a smile so full of softness it made my chest ache.

Day two was… muddy.

We attempted a “short hike,” which Jack promised would only take twenty minutes. It took nearly two hours, involved a wrong turn, and ended with all four of us ankle-deep in mud thanks to an enthusiastic detour to “see a cool rock.”

Will pretended to scold them, but I saw the way he beamed behind their backs. I took a photo of him carrying Alfie on his shoulders, both of them grinning, covered in dirt. It might be my new favourite picture of him.

That night, after the boys were finally in bed (clean-ish, warm, and passed out in the bunk room), Will and I sat on the back porch wrapped in the same old quilt, sharing a glass of wine.

“I think this is the happiest I’ve seen them in ages,” he said, voice low.

I leaned into his side. “I think this is the happiest I’ve felt in ages.”

He didn’t say anything right away. Just kissed my temple, lingered there for a second.

“Thanks for not running,” he murmured.

I smiled into his shoulder. “You’re stuck with me now, Poulter.”

“Promise?”

“Absolutely.”

The final morning, Alfie woke us up by launching himself onto the bed like a tiny human cannonball, yelling, “PANCAKE TIME!”

It was chaos. It was loud. Jack poured syrup on everything. Alfie wore a saucepan on his head for reasons still unknown. Will flipped a pancake onto the floor and swore softly under his breath, then shot me a sheepish look.

We danced around each other in the little kitchen stealing sips of coffee, exchanging quick kisses, bumping hips.

We weren’t just playing house.

We were a house now.

A slightly sticky, pancake-scented, laughter-filled house of four.

And I’d never felt more at home.

The drive home was quieter than the one up.

Not silent not with Alfie and Jack in the back, of course. But softer. Sleepier. The kind of calm that settles in after a weekend well spent. Jack was leaning against the window, fighting off a nap he’d never admit to needing, while Alfie quietly hummed the theme tune to that ridiculous frog documentary we watched two nights ago.

Will had one hand on the wheel, the other curled around mine on the centre console, his thumb tracing lazy patterns against my skin.

I turned my head and caught him watching me at a red light.

“What?” I asked, already smiling.

He shrugged. “You look like home.”

My throat caught around something warm and full. I gave his hand a small squeeze. “You’re lucky I love you, Poulter. That was dangerously close to making me cry in a Kia.”

He chuckled, leaned over to press a kiss to my knuckles. “Wouldn’t be the first time.”

Back at his house, everything fell into that familiar rhythm that had quietly become second nature.

Jack tugged his suitcase up the steps one dramatic bump at a time. Alfie somehow got glitter on his shirt despite no crafts being involved all weekend. I unpacked the snack bag while Will started a load of laundry and made tea. The kettle hissed, the boys shouted, and it was all oddly perfect.

Later, after baths and bedtime stories and two rounds of “one more drink,” we finally collapsed onto the couch.

Will’s arm was around me, my head on his chest, both of us sinking into the calm.

I tilted my head to look up at him, my fingers playing idly with the hem of his T-shirt.

“I’m really grateful for them,” I said quietly.

He glanced down at me. “The boys?”

I nodded. “Yeah. For how much they’ve let me in. I know I’m not… I’m not trying to be anything I’m not. But they didn’t have to love me back, and they did.”

Will’s expression softened. He cupped the side of my face, his thumb brushing just under my eye.

“They didn’t have to,” he echoed. “But they did. Because you’re easy to love.”

I leaned into his palm. “So are you.”

His smile turned slightly crooked, the way it always did when he got a bit flustered. “Stop it. You’ll make me think you’re in love with me or something.”

I raised a brow. “Will, we have matching toothbrushes and I know Alfie’s stuffed bear has a name. I think the secret’s out.”

He laughed, pulled me closer, and kissed me slow.

The kind of kiss that said this is real. This is forever.

When we pulled apart, I stayed tucked into his side, the sound of the boys’ soft breathing down the hall making my heart ache with how lucky I felt.

“Don’t think I’ve said this today,” I murmured, voice thick. “But I love you.”

Will pressed his lips into my hair. “I know. I love you too.”

Later that night, I was folding blankets on the end of the couch when I heard soft padding footsteps down the hall.

Alfie appeared first, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand, his curls all mussed from sleep. Jack followed behind, dragging his stuffed bear by one arm, his pyjama shirt slightly askew.

“Hey, you two,” I whispered, crouching to their level. “Everything okay?”

Jack blinked up at me. “Had a dream ‘bout frogs with hats.”

“Me too,” Alfie said, though I was fairly sure he just didn’t want to be left out.

“Sounds terrifying,” I said with mock seriousness, pulling them both into a hug. “You want some water?”

They both nodded, and we padded quietly into the kitchen. I poured them a small glass each, and they took tiny sips like they were sipping from some sacred goblet.

Once they were done, Jack leaned into my side while Alfie tugged lightly on my sleeve.

“Y/N?” Alfie asked, his voice still thick with sleep.

“Yeah, sweet boy?”

He looked up at me, earnest and serious in the way only small kids can be when they're about to say something big.

“You’re my favourite grown-up.”

My chest squeezed.

Jack nodded beside him. “Mine too. Except for Dad. But sometimes you’re even funnier.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat and smiled down at them, hugging them both tightly against me.

“Thank you, loves. That means more than you know.”

“We want you to stay forever,” Jack mumbled into my shirt.

And there it was. The milestone I hadn’t even realised I’d been waiting for. Being claimed, without question, by the two little hearts that mattered just as much.

“I think I will,” I whispered back.

Alfie yawned. “Good.”

I walked them back to their room, tucked them in again tighter this time and kissed the tops of their heads.

Back in the living room, Will was standing in the doorway, watching with that soft, slow smile that always did me in.

“They okay?” he asked.

“They’re perfect,” I replied. “Told me they want me to stay forever.”

Will didn’t answer. He just walked up, wrapped his arms around my waist, and pulled me into his chest, kissing the top of my head.

“They’re not the only ones.”

Our routine was never rigid, never perfectly structured and maybe that’s what made it feel so much like home.

Every morning began the same way: one of the boys would come barrelling into the bedroom, usually Alfie first, throwing himself dramatically across the bed like a tiny actor in a soap opera.

“Y/N,” he’d groan, flopping on top of me. “I’m starving. I haven’t eaten since yesterday.”

Then Jack would stumble in behind him, slightly more composed, clutching his stuffed bear and rubbing his eyes, mumbling, “Do we have to go to school?”

Will would grumble beside me, his face half-buried in the pillow. “I remember when weekends used to mean sleeping in…”

“Stop lying,” I teased, nudging him. “You were definitely up playing FIFA until 2am before you had kids.”

“True,” he mumbled, reaching out to steal a lazy kiss from my shoulder. “But still.”

Mornings became a kind of happy chaos cereal on the table, school shoes mysteriously going missing, Alfie complaining about his socks being “too crunchy,” Jack insisting on packing a “science rock” in his lunchbox that absolutely wasn’t allowed.

And me, weaving through all of it tying shoelaces, dodging Nerf darts, and occasionally stealing seconds with Will in the kitchen when the boys were distracted by cartoons.

He’d grab my hips as I passed, pulling me into his chest like he couldn’t not touch me, his voice low in my ear: “You’re the best part of my morning.”

I’d melt every time.

And the evenings were their own kind of magic. Dinner as a four me and Will passing dishes back and forth like we’d always done this. Alfie always needing his vegetables cut into tiny triangles for reasons unknown, Jack regaling us with stories of the playground politics, and Will sneaking glances at me like he couldn’t believe I was still here.

Later, it was homework, baths, bedtime stories always the same book at least three times in a row and then, finally, the quiet. The stillness of the house settling for the night. The hum of the dishwasher. The two of us curled up on the couch, my legs tangled over his lap, Will absently tracing patterns on my skin while some old sitcom played in the background.

And it felt… right. Effortless. Like the version of life I didn’t know I’d been waiting for.

One night, as I washed up the dinner dishes, Will came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist and pressing his face into the crook of my neck.

“I was thinking,” he murmured.

“That’s always dangerous.”

He chuckled. “I was thinking… we should plan something. Just us.”

I raised a brow, drying my hands. “Like a date?”

“Yeah,” he said, suddenly bashful. “A proper one. I miss having you to myself for longer than fifteen minutes without someone asking where their socks are.”

I laughed. “That sounds… amazing.”

“We’ll figure it out. I’ll rope in my mum or someone to take the boys for a night. Just you and me, yeah?”

“Yeah,” I said softly, leaning up to kiss him. “I’d love that.”

And I realised, standing in his kitchen in his T-shirt, hearing the boys’ sleepy giggles drift from the hallway I wasn’t just in love with him anymore. I was rooted here.

This was my life now. And it was messy, and loud, and chaotic.

But it was ours.

Will looked downright suspicious as he opened the front door to let the babysitter in. He peered past the frame like he was expecting to find someone in their twenties with lip filler and a TikTok following.

Instead, Sandra bustled in maybe around 50, wearing a chunky-knit cardigan with cat buttons and wielding a casserole dish like a weapon. Her hair was set in tight rollers, and her glasses slid down her nose every few seconds. She was a living legend from Will’s childhood street, apparently.

“Oh thank god,” I whispered, loud enough for Will to hear. “I was so worried you’d leave me for the hot young babysitter.”

Will made the most offended face. “First of all, ew. Second of all, Sandra raised me. She changed my nappies.”

“Exactly my point,” I grinned. “The bond is already there. How can I compete?”

“Unbelievable,” he muttered, trying not to laugh as he took my coat from the hook.

Sandra, unbothered and clearly having the time of her life, was already quizzing the boys on their bedtime routines and whether they preferred bananas or strawberries with their dessert.

“Don’t worry about a thing,” she said, winking at me. “We’ll be just fine.”

Will and I escaped through the door with the kind of giddy energy you get when you remember you’re an adult and not just somebody’s carer-slash-cook-slash-perpetual snack dispenser.

We didn’t do anything particularly groundbreaking. Dinner, followed by a walk around the riverfront, arm-in-arm under the soft glow of the fairy lights strung along the trees. But it felt like the kind of night I’d play back a thousand times in my head.

He let me order the fancy wine.

I let him steal chips off my plate.

He told me stories from school I hadn’t heard yet about the time Alfie tricked his substitute teacher into believing he was French, and how Jack had a crush on a girl named Cleo who only spoke in riddles.

And he looked at me like I hung the damn moon.

At one point, as we strolled past the water, his fingers tightened around mine and he pulled me to a stop. The restaurant lights shimmered behind us in the distance. His cheeks were pink from the chill.

“This is my favourite version of us,” he said softly.

I tilted my head. “What version is that?”

“The one where we get to just… be. No work. No chaos. Just you. Me. This.”

I felt that thrum deep in my chest the one that reminded me, daily, that I’d somehow stumbled into the best thing in my life without even meaning to.

I squeezed his hand. “Same.”

He leaned in, kissing me slow and soft like we had all the time in the world and maybe we did. At least tonight.

Eventually, we made our way back home, both of us a little tipsy, a little sleepy, and wrapped in that easy warmth that came from laughing too much with someone you loved.

Sandra met us at the door with an amused look and said, “They were angels. Alfie fell asleep halfway through Matilda and Jack insisted on brushing his teeth twice, for some reason. I think he was showing off.”

We thanked her a hundred times and waved her off into the night.

And then it was just us again. Shoes kicked off. My heels in a pile. His tie loose around his neck.

Will pulled me into a hug in the kitchen, chin resting on my head.

“I like date night,” he murmured into my hair.

“Me too.”

He pulled back just far enough to kiss me, and then grinned. “Next time, we’re having dessert before dinner.”

“Next time?” I teased.

“Oh yeah,” he said. “I’m already planning it.”

And I believed him.

Because when Will loved, he did it with everything he had.

And he loved me.

The peaceful bubble of our perfect date night lasted exactly forteen hours.

I was halfway through making lunch for us when Will’s phone rang a shrill, aggressive ringtone that sounded suspiciously like a duck being strangled.

“Who in the fresh hell” he muttered, bleary-eyed as he stumbled to answer.

“Mr. Poulter? This is Ms. Eddington, the school’s vice principal.”

I immediately froze mid-toast, holding the knife in the air like I was in a horror movie.

Will straightened, suddenly alert. “Yes? Everything okay?”

I couldn’t hear what she said on the other end, but I could see Will’s face drain of all colour.

“We’re on our way,” he said quickly, then hung up.

I raised my eyebrows. “That didn’t sound good.”

Will dragged a hand through his hair and gave me a look that somehow conveyed you’re not going to believe this and please help me survive all at once.

“Jack and Alfie tried to sell ‘magic rocks’ to the entire grade One cohort.”

I blinked. “...I’m sorry. Magic rocks?”

“They claim they found them in the backyard and that if you hold one under your pillow, you’ll have flying dreams.”

I snorted. “Okay, but that’s actually kind of genius.”

Will groaned. “They charged two dollars per rock. One poor kid paid in stickers and a half-eaten packet of sultanas.”

I was laughing too hard to help when we got to the school.

Inside the front office sat our tiny con artists, looking smug and only slightly guilty. Jack was swinging his legs from the plastic chair, and Alfie had his “innocent face” turned up to maximum wattage.

“You’ve got to admire their entrepreneurial spirit,” I whispered to Will.

He shot me a don’t encourage them glare.

The vice principal handed Will a plastic bag full of pebbles and muttered something about “classroom disruptions” and “currency theft.”

I crouched down in front of the boys. “Gentlemen. Magic rocks?”

“They worked!” Alfie insisted. “I dreamed about riding a unicorn with fire wings!”

“That’s because you watched How to Train Your Dragon before bed,” Will said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Jack leaned forward, hopeful. “Are we grounded?”

Will looked at me, then back at them. “What do you think?”

Jack sighed. “No screens for a week?”

“Starting now.”

“Even educational shows?”

“Yes.”

“What about YouTube tutorials on how to make flying machines?”

Will’s face twitched.

“You can read a book,” I offered.

Jack looked horrified. “That’s… so retro.”

By the time we got home, we were all exhausted. The boys sulked for ten minutes, then launched themselves into building a “magic-free rock museum” in the garden.

Will slumped against the fridge and exhaled. “I thought the most chaotic part of parenting was supposed to be nappies.”

I handed him coffee. “Nappies don’t scheme.”

He glanced over at the backyard where the boys were now yelling about ticket prices and “volcanic exhibits.”

Then he looked at me and smiled.

“You know,” he said, “this… all of it… I still wouldn’t trade it.”

I smiled back and leaned my head on his shoulder.

“Me either. Magic rocks and all.”

The chaos of the “Magic Rock Scandal” had just started to die down when the doorbell rang.

Will and I exchanged a wary look from our spots on the sofa, where we were mid-sip of well-earned tea. Jack and Alfie were still in the garden, now arguing about whether or not their “exhibit” needed security guards.

“Expecting someone?” I asked, already knowing the answer by the slight panic in Will’s eyes.

He stood, setting his mug down. “Not unless one of the other kids’ parents has come to demand a rock refund.”

I followed him to the door, half-curious, half-expecting a clipboard-wielding school official.

Instead… there stood four very well-dressed people. Two older, clearly proud parents, and two around Will’s age a striking woman with the same blue eyes and a man holding a wrapped box of chocolates awkwardly.

“Surprise!” the older woman beamed.

Will’s mouth opened. Closed. Opened again.

“Mum?”

She grinned wider. “Hello, darling! You didn’t respond to my last message, so I thought we’d just pop in and see you.” Her gaze immediately slid to me, standing beside him in Will’s T-shirt and bike shorts, hair still a little messy. “And this must be Y/N!”

Oh God.

I smiled instinctively, trying not to look like I’d just sprinted out of a tornado. “Hi um. Hello. Nice to meet you all.”

His mum practically swooped in, enveloping me in a surprisingly firm hug that smelled like floral perfume and victory. “We’ve heard so much about you!”

Will shot a look at the sky. “Sandra.”

His dad, stepped forward and shook my hand with a warm, cheeky grin. “She said you’ve gone completely soft over your childcare girl.”

“Sandra talks,” Will muttered.

The woman I assumed was his sister gave me a once-over that wasn’t judgmental more… amused. She smiled, tipping her head. “You’re even prettier than the photos.”

I choked. “Photos?”

Will let out a strangled noise and dragged a hand down his face.

“She’s just winding you up,” the brother-in-law said with a wink, holding out the chocolates. “We brought these. Bribery, in case we’re interrupting something.”

“Oh, no, not at all,” I said quickly, despite the fact we’d definitely been halfway to collapsing into a very lazy cuddle. “Come in!”

Will muttered something about divine punishment and backed up into the hallway. “The house is a mess, the kids are… somewhere, and I wasn’t mentally prepared for this.”

His mum waved it off. “We’ve seen your house worse. And we came to meet her, not inspect your baseboards.”

As they entered, the boys came thundering in from the backyard, Alfie mid-scream about “magma stones” and Jack waving a stick like a sword. They skidded to a halt.

“Nana!”

“Grandad! Auntie Lou!”

They shot toward the guests like rockets, and in seconds everyone was laughing, talking over each other, and I was standing in the middle of Will’s entire extended family, feeling oddly like I belonged.

Will drifted to my side a minute later, brushing his hand lightly along the small of my back.

“Sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t know they were coming.”

I smiled, leaning in slightly. “It’s okay. Your mum hugged me before she even asked my name, so I think I passed the vibe check.”

He laughed quietly, eyes soft as he watched his family interact with the boys and me.

“I should’ve known Sandra couldn’t keep a secret,” he said. “She probably told them everything.”

“I’m glad she did.”

He looked at me then, properly the kind of look that made everything else blur out.

“So am I.”

And for the first time, surrounded by chaos, stick-wielding six-year-olds, and every single person with the last name Poulter… I didn’t feel like the girl helping out.

I felt like part of the family.

#fanfiction #reader #x reader #one shot #requested #will poulter imagine #will poulter one shot #will poulter fanfic #will poulter x reader #will poulter #will #poulter

51 notes · View notes

sapphiconherknees · 3 months ago

Text

🌻Hi there, I’m Bee, a good girl sub, with a very dirty mind, welcome to my little corner of tumblr, where you’ll always find my kneeling.

🌻Please do me a favour by reading through this, so you can understand what my space is about and how not to overstep. Boundaries are incredibly necessary and I will uphold mine.

🌻In this space I will be sharing educational posts, fantasies, kinks and anything in between as I continue to learn more about this side of myself.

🌻 Although I do have some experience within this community it’s not as much as some may think, so come along with me and we can learn together.

🌻 Lastly have fun my lovely’s.

WHO IS BEE?

🌻Age: 30, and loving life.

🌻 Femme Lesbian (She/her)

🌻 Now you call me Bee, or darling or sweetheart.

🌻 I’m a good girl, I’m no brat, I can’t do it I’ve tried before at a push but I’m not someone whose able to bratty and that’s okay not everyone submissive is made to be bratty.

🌻 I lean towards more of a Mommy domme in my dynamics.

🌻 Every single person in the LGBTQIA+ community is welcome here. You are safe with me. I promise.

🌻 DM’s open to mutuals only, ask box open, just be respectful and be sure to check out my boundaries, so you know what not to send.

❌ If you at any point cross my boundaries, you will be blocked.

🌻 MY KINKS: Mommy, Denial, edging, soft choking, nipple play, bondage, sensation play, praise, overstimulation, spanking (hand or paddle only), somno, pet play (I'd like to explore), faux sympathy, older women make me vunerable, soft degredation, soft corruption, soft dumification, oral fixation and guided masturbation, mirror kink…

More to come when I know…💛

My Boundries

*this means do not come into my asks or DM’s with ANY of these*

Do not call me: Mommy, ma'am, mistress, any masculine terms

HARD NO'S: anything that is forceful CNC, slaps, scat, incest, needle play, fire play, gore, heavy strong degredation (soft degredation is fine), anal, body fluids (other than cum) yes this includes spit, feeder/gainer, tickling, Daddy, or him. Do not call me mommy, ma’am, mistress, I am a sub and being called these makes me feels forced into a dominant role which I am highly uncomfortable with.

I am uncomfortable with sending/receiving photos or sexting. If this is what you want you won’t find it with me.

🌻 Please do not interact with my account if you fall into any of these categories;

Cis hetro men, minors (I don't care if you turn 18 tomorrow. It's a no), homophobes, transphobes, racists, blank accounts will be blocked if you follow or interact with my account, and if you don’t have your age in your bio that’s an automatic block.

My submission isn’t yours to take. If you try you will be blocked.

Ask box and DMs rules

🌻Ask box is always open: Just remember to add in your age, an emoji with your pronouns when you send an ask! 18+ ONLY.

🌻For DM’s, I ask that if you want to dm I welcome you there but only if you’re one of my mutuals! Please respect that.

I will block you immediately if you can’t respect me, or my mutuals!

ASK GAMES

NSFW ASKS

My Writing:

In for a long night ~ Undone ~ The ribbon ~ Take your time ~ Nice and slow Prt 1 ~ Nice and slow Prt 2 ~ Three fingers deep ~ One more call ~ Gentle Touches ~ When I submit ~ Did you touch yourself? ~ On your hip ~ Watching Mommy ~ Quiet ~ Woken to your touch ~ What I’m about to get ~ Don’t rush ~ mommy’s birthday cake ~ Fragile ~ Aftercare ~ Dommed like your good girl ~ Bite me ~ You’re enjoying this too much ~ A little eager ~ Degraded and Owned ~ Thigh riding ~ Desperation ~ Speak up - Domme on her knees ~ My useless little toy ~ Dog in heat ~ Special intrests ~ Mine ~ Ride my fingers ~ pleasure ~ I own you ~ Bare, open, exposed ~ use you words ~ No noise. Just suck. ~ Next size up ~ Fluttering hole ~ Just five minutes ~ once a week

Educational posts:

Aftercare for Dommes ~ non negotiable ~ impact play ~ Sensory play as a Sub

I do not owe you a reply check out this post here to understand more.

Being disrespectful to me or my mutals, or any one of my lovely followers will result in an instant block.

Now come along ask me some questions, I’ll be patiently waiting and kneeling.

Taken Emojis

🌶️ (38, she/her),🍸 (52, she/her), ✨(22, they/them), 🥵 (33, she/her), 🍓(22, she/her), 🙈 (21, she/her), 🧸(20, Any pronouns),🪼 (21, she/her), 🩻 (30, she/her), 🐆 (19 she/her ), 🥁 (19, she/her), 💕 (29, she/her), 💋 (21, she/her), 🍥 (21, she/her), 🧟‍♀️ (19, she/her), 🌿🐾 (19, he/they/it) , 🩵 (26, she/her), 🌸 (23, she/her), 🍯 (25, she/her)

⋆｡°✩ kneeling for you, Mommy ✩°｡⋆ ⋆

#lesbian #sapphic #sapphic lesbian #wlw #wlw bd/sm #wlw blog #wlw community #wlw domme #wlw sub #lesbian sub #sub/dom #soft sub #bd/sm blog #lesbian smut #wlw concepts #men and minors dni

47 notes · View notes

ludolka · 2 months ago

Note

Paranormal Traffic group has my heart in a choke hold <3. If they like go to get dinner after lunch I imagine them ragging on eachother for random things. I.e Joel won't let Jimmy forget he tripped mid sentence and came up with a completely new word (something between a curse word and a censored version)

But Joel and Grians back and fourth is always slightly more pointed, maybe? And everyone else watches them pick on eachother, and perhaps Jim corners him and "Dude either tell him you like him or stop picking on my brother >:T" and Joel blinks and goes "It's all in good fun, ask G, he knows it" and Jimmy taps his fingers, squints and "Hm. At the very least PLEASE stop fueling the 'ship' comments, I beg of you"

This, of course, does nothing.

That makes me so happy to hear :’) they are also so close and dear to me <33

And yess, they totally do that !! They are a friend group first and foremost, they like hanging out outside of filming and I can totally see Joel driving them to a McDonald’s at like 1 or 2 am after a long session and them just joking around in the parking lot while eating or them stopping at some Chinese buffet to grab dinner when they are done earlier

I love the new word invention thing, Jimmy would absolutely do that (though they aren’t PG on this channel) and the rest of the group would adopt that word into their dictionary and use it from then on. They have fun roasting each other after sessions for whatever dumb thing that happened during it that time and laughing about it

And yes, Joel and Grian picking on each other is,, different from how they pick on anyone else. I can see them getting sometimes rather personal, but neither take it to heart and they are cool afterwards like nothing happened. Them arguing over something, saying some rather hurtful shit, only for Grian to stop mid sentence and say something in a completely calm voice like

“Give me some of your fries, I ate mine and I want more”

“Sucks to be you, you should have ordered a large instead of a medium” and still gives him the rest of his fries

And they also have this tendency to both argue about three different topics at once and also to pick up arguing about a topic they started hours or days ago but got interrupted and them just knowing what’s going on while anyone listening in is just very confused and lost

Also Jimmy absolutely hates the ship comments. Maybe to kinda get back at the two and to try to embarrass them, he brings it up during filming once

“Do you guys know people are shipping you? What are your thoughts on that?”

“Shipping us? Shipping us where?”

“Come on Tim, you know that’s both impossible and illegal. Don’t be dumb and believe everything you read online”

“Yeah and I mean we are both here, aren’t we? How would we be shipped while also being here? Think Jim”

They absolutely know what he means, but they enjoy tormenting him until he gives up trying to explain it to them. Also whenever Jimmy asks them to tone something down not to fuel commenters or theories, nothing ever changes and sometimes they even play more into it just to mess with Jimmy specifically

Jimmy once asks Joel to tone down the nicknames, so during next filming Joel makes it a point to call Grian baby or sweetheart in every other sentence. Grian picks up on the bit after like the first five “baby”-s in only ten minutes and plays into it, returning the nicknames that he normally wouldn’t and they also spend that session suspiciously not arguing and standing closer to each other than usual

#activity detected au #ask #gribeans

53 notes · View notes

disappearinginq · 7 months ago

Text

I really wish I could be convinced that more people would be interested in non-ship stuff for fandoms I'm in.

Look, we all know we write for ourselves. I get it. I do. But my desire (ability) to finish things is hinged on feedback. My two longest fics that I wrote the fastest were because of audience engagement. And because I knew I had people I respected and liked reading, and I wanted them to enjoy the read, I wrote better.

Now I feel like I'm just stuck in No Man's Land of fandom, and while I have like a dozen things half finished, they never seem to actually BE finished because if the audience is me, then I know how it ends. There's not much point writing it down.

So this is basically my To Do List.

The Rookie - I just don't care about what 90% of the fandom cares about

1. Series of one shots that establish Angela and Tim's BFF status that may or may not lean Tim aspec because I'm me.

2. Pre series flashbacks to Tim in his time in service when he survives an airstrike that kills two of his friends and almost kills him.

3. Trauma Tim post season 6, because in rapid succession, he loses his job on metro, he witnesses his old team die in a way eerily similar to the way he was almost killed in the airstrike, had a friend commit suicide in front of him after confessing to being dirty, gets accused of being dirty himself, and is again almost killed in close quarter combat (among other things that will remain unmentioned here)

Slow Horses

1. Do not ask me why but I love the idea that Lamb potentially met River was he was a kid because he had to work closely with David Cartwright and River is always where he's not supposed to be

2. River goes missing, and for once, not his fault. Lamb has to come to terms that just because he pretends not to care, doesn't mean anyone buys it

3. Post season 4, somebody finds out that River is the last remaining son of Frank's assassin cult, and it goes about as well as can be expected. I fully intend to have Lamb use this line: "trying to detain you is like trying to nail jello to a tree".

Magnum PI (yes, I still work on these)

1. Finish Wrong Side. I actually have like another 10-15k words on it, but it's not in order or complete scenes, but it does include Thomas’s recovery and discovery that Hannah is the one who sold them out

2. I have like 6 other chapters to Bad Things Happen that I half wrote but then retired the card

3. Crossover with MacGyver because I thought Mac could use some down time in Hawaii after season 4 and the last half of season 3

Tracker 1. Colter goes missing during one of his cases, and I borrow heavily from an episode of Lethal Weapon wherein Colter will be held hostage in an illegal drug trial that he stumbled into and now finds himself an unwilling participant, and I drag Russell into it because that is how big brothers work

Hudson & Rex - honestly, I have the most written for this fandom, even though the fandom itself is pretty quiet, but it's most of a bingo card 1. Finish Oh The Weather Outside is Frightful because damn son it's been years

2. In no particular order, I have Bad Things Happen Bingo It's Not My Blood, Stitches, Caught in a Snare, Falls Through the Ice and three others that fit other prompts - a boating accident, Charlie finally finds himself at the bottom of a well (sort of) and completes his "Timmy and Lassie Scenario" bingo card, and where Charlie realizes he's developed claustrophobia after having a mine collapse on him, being locked in a freezer storage, almost crushed by a shipping container, buried alive, etc and gets stuck in an elevator with Jesse

42 notes · View notes

yuugen-benni · 1 year ago

Text

''Not a Father's Day''

When your husband gets a baby fever TAGS: Childe x reader, the word ''sex'' appear only once, mentions of pregnancy (yes I'm breaking my own rule), Modern AU A/N: This is based on ''How I met your mother'' T4 E7, and I'M OBSESSED WITH THE HEADER PLUSHIE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Guys, when you get married remember, Marriage has three stages:

Stage number 1: Teen era Even after you've known each other for years and years, almost tried to kill each other, and probably seen you both naked, you'll act like teenagers in their prime. You know, teasing, blushing for any reason, sex in the most inopportune places, those things that one day you will remember and feel ashamed of yourself.

Stage number 2 - Finding out The part of the relationship where you realize you knew absolutely nothing about your partner. Actually, "Nothing" is an exaggeration but you get the point. You start to know about small things that are shocking to the point of being considered a secret. Everyone has a secret, right? And the best way to count them is to dump each one. For example, Childe talking about her crazy exes:

''it's raining, look!….Oh, this reminds me so much of a crazy ex of mine who was in front of my apartment one night yelling about how she and I were meant for each other, and her husband was by her side! And the unbelievable was-''

And he kept talking and talking, while your expression was screaming ''There is more ?!'' and your mind thanks God for being normal;

Stage number 3 - Perfect couple

Here is when you became a perfect couple. What is a perfect couple? Two people who have spent so much time together that they can now create an encyclopledia about their partner. Habits, tics, favorite foods, the number of Hot Wheels cars your partner has collected, that sort of thing. Even reading expressions is possible;

The fights end and so do the disagreements

But there is only one subject that can break this: Babies.

''Hey babe, I'm back!" Childe announces his arrival, the door closes behind him as he walks over to you in the kitchen, and peck your lips "I was on my way here when I found out this little sock on our doorstep…?" Childe leans on the counter by his side with a confused expression while he plays with the child's sock, noticing the cute little blue patterns. You, who was kindly decorating cookies for Childe's siblings, looked up to look at the little thing

''It must be from new neighbors, they got the opposite apartment and knocked our door asking for help'' You started, leaving aside the piping bag ''Finally some new people! It's been so long since someone rented an apartment here'' the man commented, approaching the cookies discreetly before wincing at the slap you gave his hand

''They have two kids'' Continuing ''a baby girl and a boy with Teucer's age''

At the mention of his brother, Childe's expression changed, forgetting his red fingers. ''Awesome, we could invite them to dinner this weekend, If that's not a problem'' He gave an idea, but then raised an eyebrow at your dull expression

''They seem like good people…but I-I'm sure they'll ask those awkward questions like 'when are you two having a baby' and then apologize for being intrusive after being intrusive'' Of course, it was just an assumption, you had only interacted with them for minutes but your biggest mistake in this conversation was bringing up the subject you two avoid. Childe laughed awkwardly, scratching the back of his head.

''Well-''

"Childe, we already talked about this. You just have a silly baby fever, and in case you didn't know, fever goes away" You quickly dismissed him, knowing he wouldn't give up so soon. Having a child was a big request, a big wish. But it's not like it wouldn't be ''easy'', you have enough money to have 50 kids and they still wouldn't use up half of Childe's bank account. His family lives in the apartment next door and could teach you more about how to take care of children…But there was still an insecurity boiling inside you.

"But what if it doesn't go away ? What If the urge to go out just to buy little socks for our child keeps eating me ?" He was almost pleading, looking into your eyes just when you tried to avoid his gaze

"...First, you need to give me good arguments" you replied after sigh, somewhat expressing your guilty. Childe opens a big smile and approaches you once more, A fox look - persuasive "hmm... don't you want hold a mini silly Childe in your arms ?-"

"Cut it off! This is serious!"

"O-okay!" He chuckled softly before silence filled the room, he looked at the floor and then at the main kitchen window "We would practically be building a story…That's not the reason I would want to have a child, in fact you is my reason. Sometimes I feel like you are the reason for my existence… and they would [literally] understand me"

You stayed quiet and walked away from the counter, taking off your apron before gently kissing his lips. He cupped your face, wiping away the small traces of flour on your cheeks. ''I'm convincing, aren't I?'' He whispered and pulled away, taking a few steps backwards as he bit into the cookie he stole while you weren't looking. Bastard. You didn't even have time to shout at him because the man was already on the other side of the apartment; you sighed, but couldn't help but giggle.

You married a idiot, a handsome idiot. Have fun.

#yes guys I like sitcoms it's my obsession #this was actually fun to write!#benni #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #childe x reader #tartaglia x reader #ajax x reader #genshin x reader #genshin imagines #2024 is my year #genshin #childe #tartaglia #Obrigadaeuteamo

226 notes · View notes

frostyhelltime · 3 months ago

Text

A Folly of a Plan

Chapter 2

Chapter 1 here.

Alastor x singerOC

Warnings: None, just Alastor being manipulative. So it's your average day.

Clara could already feel quite easily how charmed she was by him that first night. Everything he did felt…calculated didn't feel quite like the right word, but she couldn't think of another. The leaning back to look more alluring and match her own posture, pulling her closer than he needed to during their dance, his smile...but somehow she didn't mind.

It's when he's back another night and they find themselves chatting by the bar again that she takes note of the gloves she remembered him wearing that first night too. It seemed to be a usual part of his outfit.

"A man of taste I see. These are quite nice gloves." She compliments, used to discerning good fabric from shoddy fabric. A skill her mother instilled in her to help keep up the appearances her father was oh so fond of.

She instinctively reaches for his hand without thinking and Alastor looks over at their connected hands as Clara strokes her thumb against his gloved palm. She at least has the presence of mind to take her hand away quickly. Quite an observant and quick learner, it seems.

“My mother always said that we must dress to impress.” He says, always smiling in his charming way before offering his hand to her.

“You seem to have just as much boundless energy as the other night. Do you need a little help burning off that excess?” He asks, his polite tone not hinting at any kind of ulterior motive.

She looks to the band, listening to the slowed sound they were playing for now. It wasn't bad…and he was right. She did still feel entirely too restless. She chuckles to herself and turns back to him, taking his hand and lifting off her seat.

“Anyone ever tell you you can read people like a book?” She asks playfully as they walk out to the dancefloor. At least the song is slow enough they can continue to talk.

“Once or twice.”

There's a hint of mischief in his eyes and she almost wants to question it.

“As for what your mother said…mine said something similar. She sounds like a brilliant woman.” Clara compliments, unaware of the brownie points she was unknowingly earning by complimenting his mother.

“Likewise.” He chuckles. Their conversation flows far easier than he expected, if he's being honest. He doesn't even realize that not one, not two, but three songs have passed by the time they stop chattering enough to check the time. She was quick witted and easy to talk to, had fascinating opinions on everything, from politics to business to theatre and music. He could see them being quite good friends. He supposes when he's no longer being gossiped about and he dumps her, he'll have to try to see if they can remain amicable. But he's getting ahead of himself now.

Clara is actually a little sad when she's worked out that excess energy and ready to return to the bar with him. Perhaps she'll ask him if he'll come see her perform again, so she can steal another dance.

It's when they go back to sit at the bar that she addresses Roy again.

"I know it's a pain but could you make a sidecar for little ol' me?" Clara asked, batting her eyelashes even though they both knew she didn't have to. It's easy for the man to just huff a laugh and roll his eyes playfully.

"Only because you asked so nicely.”

Once Roy has gone to attend to other customers and they were left alone again, he turns to her.

“How about ‘I Can't Give You Anything But Love'? For my request, I mean. There are some…difficult high notes in the song but you seem to be fond of those sorts of songs.” He comments, having noticed the types of songs she likes to cover, both from seeing her perform and their talks on their own favorite singers.

As they sit at the bar and sip their drinks, he's fishing in his pocket for something before he pulls out a business card. He looks around and grabs a leftover pen from the bar and begins writing down something.

“As much as I enjoy keeping your company all to myself…I do have a radio show. I think it would be marvelous to have you come on and sing a song or two.” He says, glancing at her briefly. He has to hold back a chuckle at how shocked she looks, not realizing the connection she had made when they met.

Her mouth falls open in shock, eyes wide a moment. If she was more cognizant she would feel foolish for acting so silly. But there's no time to think about that as she nods her head rapidly, pulling herself together and beaming at him.

"Oh I would absolutely love to!!" She agrees quickly, leaning a bit closer to see what he was writing, but not so close she would accidentally touch him.

“I get recognition for discovering new talent,you get more eyes on you and this…” He pauses a moment, trying to think of a word that was more complimentary than what he wanted to say.

“...venue.” He finishes and she snickers a moment, knowing full well he was being polite. The place wasn't a dump. But it certainly wasn't the fanciest place.

She certainly wouldn't have minded being close to him and casually touching him, but the fact he's wearing gloves indoors and the way he seemed to recoil slightly when Roy's hand accidentally brushed against his to hand off a drink earlier...she thinks he probably isn't a touchy person in general, and makes sure to keep her hands to herself unless he initiates. It's easy to not be bothered by it though, his charming smile making her own feel so effortless.

Her smile goes from exuberant to simply content, although it's clear she's still excited and almost unable to sit still with this new offer before her. It's almost…adorable, he thinks.

"Will you...come to another show?" She asks tentatively, holding the card close to her chest as if it's a valuable treasure.

"You'll see me here again, my dear. I can assure you of that." He says with his signature smile and added a wink before he departs. Alastor notices Clara reach for him in her excitement to thank him for the opportunity, and then stop, taking her hand back before she made contact. She must be observant as well. That may be a problem later on for him but he wasn’t going to worry about it for now. Right now he was just going to enjoy the fact that for the duration of this plan he wouldn't be tormented by constant touching.

"It was very lovely to see you again, Miss Massou." He says giving a polite bow before he says goodbye and heads out himself, giving her one last playful wink before he does.

Clara beamed, still on cloud nine from the business card still resting securely in her hands.

There's a slight rosiness to her cheeks and a bashful smile on her face when he winks at her as he goes, and it's clear that, at least from him, she enjoys the attention.

"I can't wait. It was very lovely seeing you again too." She calls out as he's leaving, standing and doing a small curtsy herself to be polite, a well-practiced motion she has done many times for many different events...but not usually in a place like this.

She can tell he seems a bit old fashioned, but there's something about that she finds endearing, and even charming. He seems old fashioned in all the right ways, she thinks. Polite, a gentleman, but modern in the right aspects as well. He was in a jazz bar after all. He also seems earnestly polite, like he's respectful because it's what he wants to do, and not because it's what others tell him to do. There's also something about that she quite likes as well. She looks down at the card again once he's gone, biting her lip to contain a soft squeal of excitement before getting ready to leave herself.

———⋅˚₊‧♬ ‧₊˚ ⋅———

She's positively giddy as she walks through town, a brilliant smile on her face that she can't hide as she passes people by on the way to the radio station. This time she wasn't dressed up as the glamorous Clara Massou, in a fancy and tight dress, and alluring smokey eyes and red lips beckoning you from across the room. That was a getup that looked striking on the stage where she needed to be dramatic, but felt garishly out of place in the light of day. She was dressed as she normally would be during the day. Fresh faced but still beautiful with rosy cheeks, an elegant and more conservative dress covering her frame and keeping her modesty quite well hidden as she carried herself with her normal poise and grace. It would be quite easy to not realize they are one and same woman, with how drastic the wardrobe and makeup changes are.

She smooths out her dress almost absentmindedly, more of a nervous habit than anything before she knocks on the door to the station, her eyes lighting up when she hears the door open.

"Hello again! Its Clara." She explains almost immediately, in case the change in appearance has him stumped since he has only met her a few times.

Alastor, for his part simply looks confused until she speaks, and the voice clicks for him.

“My, my. What a transformation.” He hums aloud to himself, opening the door wider for her as he looks her over. Quite a chameleon apparently.

Clara has to hold back a small giggle at the quickly covered look of surprise Alastor has at seeing her so differently today. Surprise is quite a cute look on him, she thinks.

"I'm so delighted to be here! Thank you for having me!" Her smile is earnest and truthful as she does a polite curtsy for him in place of a handshake, thinking he would likely prefer that. The edge of his smile quirks up just a little more naturally at that, his shoulders relaxing a bit as she walks past him without touching him.

“I'm just as delighted. I have to say I am surprised. You look like an entirely different person…” He shakes his head in fascination. “But still just as beautiful, of course.” No sense wasting time when it's clear she's interested. The sooner he can date her, the sooner he can be done with it all.

She smiles back at him, not turning her head away even as she feels her cheeks redden just the slightest bit.

"And I see you're just as handsome and charming as I remember, thankfully." She compliments him back, her tone polite enough that it could be seen as a genuine compliment instead of a flirtation. Of course...there was no way of knowing for sure though. But she wouldn't flirt so shamelessly and obviously. Yet, anyway.

“Nervous?” He asks her curiously as he leads her in, getting her some water for now and himself a cup of coffee.

She looks bashfully down at her foot, which she can't seem to stop tapping against the ground.

“How could you tell?” She jokes even as she takes the water and drinks.

“You'll do fine, I'm sure. Your voice is magnificent.” He compliments, and not even as an attempt to further woo her. He had met many talented people in his life that he had brought into his station but it's been awhile since he had brought someone on with talent like hers.

He helps her get set up in the sound booth with him pretty easily. She at least seemed familiar with recording equipment, which wasn't surprising given her clear passion to have a music career. She still looks nervous as she sits across from him in front of her own microphone. But there's no more time to delay. The show must go on and it was almost time to go live.

Alastor welcomes back the audience and introduces Clara reminding them that he had found her at the local jazz club he likes to go to. Short, sweet, simple intro.

When it was her turn to speak he leans back in his chair listening to her, his eyes watching carefully. Alastor could tell she was nervous which was cute in a way but he understood why her nerves were so heightened. This was quite the opportunity for her, he imagines.

She's nervous as she speaks, and she sounds like it too at first but the more she talks the more she transforms back into the woman he saw on stage.

“H-Hi! Hello! This is Clara Massou. I'm so happy to be here with you all today. I really wanted to show off my range of capabilities. So..I do hope you enjoy what I've prepared!" She begins and takes a deep breath before the music starts.

She's still clearly fighting her nerves until the music starts, and then it's almost as if a switch has been flipped and then she's truly the stage siren he saw back in the jazz lounge again. She closes her eyes and feels the music just as much as she sings it, despite the only one able to see her being Alastor. Her voice is soft and full of longing at first before it begins to build, her strength and power coming through, eventually building into such a powerful and clear sound that it's hard not to be captivated by her working her craft expertly, even without the visual of seeing her facial expressions full of passion.

There was something hypnotizing about her voice and he knew it wasn't just him that thought that. Being the observant man that Alastor was he witnessed her voice captivating the audience at the lounge, and he's relieved to see it hadn't been a fluke or a one time thing.

When Clara really began to sing Alastor closed his eyes for a moment, just enjoying the woman's voice. It truly was pleasant to the ears. When she finishes he claps his two hands together before taking the microphone and signing off for the night.

She was so lost in what she loves that she blinks in surprise, jumping slightly when she hears him clap, practically forgetting for a moment he was there.

“You heard her here first folks. Be on the lookout for the name you're sure to see everywhere someday, Clara Massou!” He grins at her and gives her a playful wink. The high praise and wink to go along with it just makes her blush, a smile so big on her face she thinks her cheeks may hurt later.

“In the meantime you can find her singing at the Sapphire Flame on 7th Street.” He is focused on his broadcast again and doesn't even realize she's staring at him until he's officially off the air. Once he does he turns to face her fully, an eyebrow raised.

“What?” He asks her curiously.

“Sorry. You're just…a natural. You sound like you were made for radio!” She gushes excitedly, her hands clasped together as she praises him.

He actually laughs at that, instead of a reserved chuckle this time.

“I'm glad. Radio to me is what music seems to be to you.” He says. If there's one thing he can't deny, it's her passion for it. But passion only gets you so far. Fortunately, much like him, he thinks she has both the skills and the charisma to go far.

Shame this is all a farce. He imagines they would be quite the power couple if they stayed together.

"I have no doubt there will be talent agencies reaching out to you at the jazz lounge soon enough." Alastor says giving Clara a friendly nod as he stands and opens the door for them to walk through and leave the booth.

"I hope so!" She nods vehemently, unable to hide her excitement as they walk out. Nor would she want to. "I have butterflies in my stomach just like the first night I was the main singer at the lounge." She laughs and smiles almost bashfully, looking away slightly as she recalls the way her heart had pounded in anticipation when she stepped onto that stage by herself for the first time.

"This was just absolutely wonderful. Thank you again for inviting me." She says politely, doing a small but polite curtsy out of habit. Another softer edge to the smile of his at her quite polite habit, that he's pieced together is for his benefit. Besides, he always found good manners charming, after all.

“Of course. I do hope you'll still save me a dance after your performances, even as you get popular.” He says, voice dropping a little lower as he moves closer to her. He can tell his attempts at flirting are certainly working from the way her breath hitches and her eyes widen.

He is handsome and charming, and she's aware he knows it. She was used to a lot of men flashing their money and/or good looks and assuming that was enough. But that wasn't exactly her style. Good looks and money were great obviously, but if the personality wasn't right for her, she could care less about their net worth or their looks. He didn't do any of that. He didn't show off his money or anything like that. He was just...him. He just…showed his charms, his politeness, his good taste, his humor…how she could possibly say no to that offer?

“O-of course.” She manages to get out when her throat doesn't feel so dry.

———⋅˚₊‧♬ ‧₊˚ ⋅———

Over the next few weeks, Clara finds she starts to look for him in the crowd during her performances, smiling nice and big when he catches her eye. She's really started looking forward to their dances and conversations afterwards too, usually heading over to where he was after a show once she's done a little bit of networking and fan service. Neither one says anything about the fact that routine has become a habit, but it's an unspoken rule that they follow.

This night was no different, although she was taking a little longer than usual get over there, talking to a man in a business suit excitedly as he hands her a card.

In the past the brunette haired man would only go to the lounge a few times a week but now he had been going nearly everyday. Just to see her. At first it was just to continue this little game of flirtation they so publicly did, but eventually he realized he was going regardless.

He was once again making small talk with Roy while he waited for her to inevitably get to him. It was like clockwork. Alastor shows up, chats with Roy, listens to her sing, chats some more while she networks, and then they can dance and talk the night away as much as they please.

Clara bounces over and sits in the chair next to Alastor and holds out a fancy looking business card for them to see, oddly more energetic than usual, and seemingly bursting with the urge to speak.

"That fella over there is hosting a private party with some people, and one or two of them are from the music industry and he wants me to perform! He said he heard me on your radio show, Alastor! And he just had to come check me out himself to see if I would be a good fit for the gig!" Clara is looking at Alastor as she talks excitedly at first, practically bouncing in her seat in uncontained excitement.

Alastor looks at Clara, hardly surprised. "See what did I tell you cheri?" He says, testing the waters with a cute nickname he's sure will likely make the red on her cheeks bloom, like he's gotten the hang of causing. She blinks a few times, eyes widening as she processes the name. Once she does, her rosy cheeks are evident as she glanced to the side and smiles to herself, clearly pleased with the name choice. Exactly as he thought.

He thinks now is the perfect time to strike.

"Are you busy or would you care to join me outside for a walk in the moonlight? It is rather stuffy in here." He says.

Then she's looking up at him again despite her blush and she's nodding almost immediately, unable to hide any eager edge to her voice.

"That sounds just lovely! I bet the sky looks just beautiful tonight." She nods again, standing up off the stool once she finishes her drink.

Alastor was solely focused on Clara as they spoke. The way her blue irises were blinking, the way she blushed when he called her cheri, and how she was oh so quick to agree to join him. His plan was going perfectly. He had her nearly eating out of his palm.

Once she has a coat on to keep herself warm she gladly leaves with Alastor, Clara talking to him about her opinion on what he talked about on his radio show that day.

“-and you were completely right about the cast at Pearl Theatre! They truly outdid themselves this time!”

She had been a little shy about admitting she listened to it at first, but the more they talked and spent time together the more she enjoyed hearing his thoughts and opinions on topics.

Alastor listened to her, actually a little surprised she had become such an avid listener. "Ahh, so you listen to me? I am flattered." He says smoothly. His smile only grew wider, but genuinely wider as she shyly explained when she first listened in. It had been the day after she had appeared, it seemed. So she had meant it when she had complimented him so earnestly that day.

Despite being bashful before she has a bit of her brazen courage back again now that they're alone.

"I do! I found myself listening after that day and I don't think I can stop now." She laughs as she walks alongside him.

You truly do have such a wonderful voice made for radio." She finds herself sighing wistfully as she compliments him. She even thinks perhaps she can be a bit bolder, at least with that pet name he called her earlier.

"It's just an absolute shame your listeners don't get to see that you look as good as you sound." She looks to him and bats her eyelashes, a coy smile on her face as she flirts back a little less subtly. It has become easier to be herself when it was just the two of them, at least when he wasn't throwing her off balance with his own flirtations. Her natural self was more confident, outgoing, and bold than the usual scattered mess he seemed able to reduce her to sometimes.

“Oh? I suppose that's some knowledge you'll have to live with being the sole owner of.” He teases before gently taking her hand and tugging her out of the way of a puddle she's about to step in as if he wasn't the one that usually recoiled at most casual touches she's seen him have to endure. On the other hand he doesn't seem to realize the unusual action of his, but Clara does, and her heart is beating faster knowing he reached for her first, even if it was just to keep her from mussing up her shoes.

She's so distracted by that fact, and the fact he doesn't let her hand go afterwards for a few moments that she doesn't quite realize he's talking to her again at first.

"Ah. I'm sorry. What?" She blinks a moment, her gaze shifting from his hand to his face again.

“I said...If I might be so…bold. Would you perhaps be interested in dinner with me sometime?” He asks, as if he isn't nervous at all. Which he isn't, to be honest. No need to be nervous when you're so very sure she'll say yes.

Despite his obvious flirtations, and her even more obvious ones, she's still taken aback when he actually asks her out. She feels almost silly for not expecting it, especially when she's normally so very used to people asking her out. Except this time she would actually like to accept.

"I would love to!” She says the words so quickly they practically run together. “Name a time and place and I'll make sure I'm there in my best!" She says in a forcefully more calm voice, doing a small twirl in her current dress for emphasis despite her trying to make her voice sound less eager. Although whether she's emphasizing her figure or her dress was up for debate.

Alastor chuckles, placing his hand over his mouth as he watches the display she puts on.

"Hmmm." He hums. "Lets say this Friday? I will pick you up at six o'clock and take you to a real nice place?" Alastor questions, smiling at her eagerness. He was very pleased that he was wrapping Clara around his finger but he didn't realize that she wasn't the only one; didn't realize the small ways he was becoming more comfortable with her, and the way their dynamic was shifting and becoming easier between them from all the casual talks and the way their personalities meshed so well, like tides pulling at each other.

"That sounds perfect. I'll make sure I'm ready!" She's happy to agree, nailing down the details of where to pick her up. She feels like she's on cloud nine all the way home, humming delightfully to herself as she takes a bath and thinks of what to wear, deciding to spoil herself a little and use some of the fancy oils and perfumes for the bath that her father usually brought back from business trips.

Although, on the other side of town, as Alastor looked over the address she gave him for a pick up spot for their date, he chews on his lip nervously. He began to wonder if perhaps he had picked the wrong target. Perhaps picking up someone from that neighborhood might be a little more attention than he bargained for…

But still...surely he could figure something out if there were any troubles.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor #alastor x reader #alastor x oc

20 notes · View notes

lady-of-blossoms · 10 months ago

Text

「 ✦ whispers of heartbreak 5✦ 」

READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

WARNING!!⚠️: Rape, Forced abortion, bleeding, Angst.

Ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4

the next day when you wake up, you don’t get greeted by the disgusting sight of gojo and Rebecca, instead gojo sits on a barstool by the kitchon island.

"Gojo?" you say confused, as you walk over to the fridge to get yourself Some breakfast.

"Oh by the way gojo, where is rebecca-" you ask but get intereupted by gojo wrapping his arms around your waist intimately.

"Since her baby wasn’t mine there was no point of keeping her in this house. And talking about babies that arent mine, that pregnancy of yours, Abort it, since its not mine" he says as he rests his chin on your shoulder.

you tense up, what the hell did he just say??? "what!? No !!" you nudge him off of you.

"YIN, You don't have a choice..."

you didn't have a choice did you now?, well it doesn't matter now anyways, because you aren't pregnant anymore.

You have no energy whatsoever, you barely eat anymore, and you refuse to talk to gojo, you just hate that you had to abort your first miricale baby.

As you sleep one day, in the middle of the night somebody crawls into your bed, the somebody being gojo, he unbuckles his belt and drags down his pants, he pulls down your panties.

"GOJO?, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?, DONT TOUCH ME!!” You scream

"Chill I’m not even doing anything…Yet" he smirks as he holds your wrists in place keeping you unable to move or do anything else than say stop and cry.

"GOJO, DONT YOU FUCKING DARE, IM TELLING YOU" you scream at him loudly, as you cry and struggle aimlessly to get him to let go of your wrists.

"If he could get you pregnant, than I can too, and nothing will stop me" he thrusts his length into you harshly.

"No…No!…NO!, stop I dont want this. WHY???” You scream as the pain shudders like lightning through your whole body, it hurts, when geto did it, he was much more gentle, but gojo didn’t even try to hold back.

he moans and groans as he thrusts in and out roughly “take that, hngh~, such a good fucking slut"

He moans out as he twists your nipple and thrusts harder.

Tears stream down your face harder than ever, you feel as if he is tearing you apart, why, what did you do to desserve this, the pain of the abortion still hurts, but then this on top, you feel as though you are being punished for something you did in your previous life, you cry, cry and cry, it hurts so much, it burns the only thing you can think about is the pain, is it normal for it to be this painful, probably not, but it doesn’t matter because gojo does it anyways, even though you say no and don’t give consent.

“Stop…stop…no…I don’t want to….why me?….no…consent…." Your words come out slurred as you pass out from the pain and crying.

When you wake up, he is asleep, either his cock still inside of you, you flinch as you pull him out and stand up, the concoction of blood and cum drips down your thighs and onto the floor, leaving a trail behind you as you walk to the bathroom. When you get to the bathroom you look in the mirror and all you see is bite marks, bruises, red crying marks on your cheeks and the concoction dripping down you legs, you throw up into the toilet bowl.

What did you do to deserve this, you keep throwing up until your wheezing and crying, you sit down on the toilet and put a pad in your panties, your not on your period but you don’t want anybody to see the pain and suffering your going through, so you hide it.

You put bandaids on your red and bleeding nipples and puts some clothes on, you walk into the kitchen and get yourself water, it doesn’t taste the same anymore, it used to give you meaning to life but not anymore, three days is what it takes to die from dehydration right?, well that’s a long time but it’s gonna have to go, from then on, no more water.

When gojo wakes up he groans as he feels the throbbing in his cock, he doesn’t understand why, he sits up he’s in your bedroom, he doesn’t remember why, he sees blood on his pubic hair, and he doesn’t remember why, he stands up and follows a trail of red and white stains on the floor, he doesn’t remember why, he hears noises from the kitchen, he walks in and sees you, you look broken with a big cut on the left side of your face under your eye, he doesn’t remember why.

"A-are you ok, Y/n?, what’s wrong?" He reaches out for your arm but you flinch and he retracts him arm back, he doesn’t understand or remember what he did or didn’t do

"You don’t remember do you, well then don’t mind if I drop a fucking bomb of information, you raped me last night, remember now?" You said in a hiss as you stare into his soul with your empty eyes.

Taglist: @qashmer @sukunaspillow @labelt-san

Rape prevention hotline

#gojo x reader #gojo x y/n #jjk headcanons #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jjk x y/n #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x y/n #jujutsu kaisen x you #gojo angst #rapevictim #rapeawareness #gojo x you #gojo satoru x y/n #gojo satoru x you #satoru gojo x reader

36 notes · View notes

damianbugs · 1 year ago

Note

thoughts on bruce x jack drake?

hello anon apologies for the late reply but when i first received this ask i immediately assumed there was a leak in mine and @plutoslvr messages because we were literally talking about it about two seconds beforehand. i could barely sleep that night.

my thoughts are that old man yaoi is so enjoyable when it's just slightly ridiculous and entirely impossible. there are three ideal sections of the brujack ship (enjoyed by population NO ONE, apparently, but with our combined efforts i imagine we can spark this flame):

rivals to lovers

bruce wayne vs wanting to bone people who want him dead

doomed by the narrative

1. rivals to lovers.

bruce and jack competing in the worlds most intense "who is the best average-leaning-towards-okay dad" battle. trying to outperform in casual "okay dad" actions to win "okay dad" points from tim, something that is totally normal and entirely possible (jack is always in the lead and bruce has not yet realised that he will never overtake him).

this one is so fucking funny to me. silly events such as them fighting on who gets to take tim to his school events, comprising on taking turns (for tim's sake, not because they want to) or attending them together (the pta now think bruce wayne and jack drake are in a relationship). jacks like im taking tim to the skate park and bruce is like well i told tim i'd take him to lunch — now it's bruce and jack taking their kid to the park then lunch together and the paparazzi have no idea how to headline this.

i imagine eventually tim can't handle this truly bizarre tension filled dynamic anymore so he cancels last minute and bruce and jack are like, well, we've already booked a table at this super expensive restaurant AND that cool movie afterwards, so we might as well make use of them.

at some point the "i HAVE to one up the other guy to impress my son" becomes "i HAVE to one up the other guy to impress our son AND so he realises how i'm obviously a catch"

i imagine eventually when they form some sort of established relationship ("do not call me your damn boyfriend, bruce, are we fifteen?") the rivalry doesn't really stop, but it's far more fond and well, tim's just glad he doesn't need to set aside two days a week to make sure he spends time with each of them.

2. bruce wayne vs wanting to bone people who want him dead

now we all know bruce's ideal type is someone who is either a) actively a danger to his life or b) was at some point more inclined to being a danger in his life or a secret third thing that is c) would become a danger to his life if pushed slightly in that direction. we've no time to psychoanalyse this but it's hardly a point that needs to be explained after taking a look at his long list of exes.

now, after this, is it truly out of the realm of possibility that after jack drake finds out that bruce wayne is the fucking batman and is to partly blame for tim's dangerous life choices he stomps over to the man's house and threatens to SHOOT HIM, that bruce wants him carnally. my exact words when reading this scene was "rather reservedly, i imagine this level of foolish and almost stupid bravery impressed bruce, regardless if it it was for entirely unselfish reasons on jack's part or if it was genuinely out of care for tim" i then say "i also think this would have moved bruce, emotionally, figuratively, poetically, sexually WOAH"

we all know that canonically when bruce falls in love or becomes even slightly interested in someone, he goes STUPID and impulsive. he's sending jack rare artefacts and really specific gifts and throwing galas with the sole purpose of inviting jack all without even considering that is actually not a normal response to have after someone threatens to kill you. perhaps he doesn't even realise this is something more than just paranoid obsession, and he tries to rationalise it like "i'm only trying to convince him to come with me to the museum so i can work out what kind of person he is in casual date settings and also to kiss him WAIT"

this one is funny if jack is just not interested at all and he's like okay what the fuck what kind of mind games is this guy trying to pull. tim is your mentor trying to tell me something through the purchase of these front seat opera house tickets and tim is like i can't believe this is real life i hope this is all a nightmare this can't be happening to me. bruce is hopelessly infatuated and jack is like don't think i won't file a restraining order against you BATMAN.

or it can get funnier if jack is like I WONT FALL FOR YOUR SEDUCTION TECHNIQUES BATMAN (proceeds to fall for batman's seduction techniques).

bonus alfred is actively praying on jacks downfall (canon) and is experiencing war flashbacks when bruce begins to display lovesick behaviour

3. doomed by the narrative

now as you may have noticed most of these work before the bright red alarm that is JACK DRAKE'S TRAGIC DEATH. his death in and of itself is already so sad, because he was changing, he was better and tim was so close to having everything he wanted, and jack was truly hopeful to be present and good to his son.

if we now throw in the mix of this shortlived romance, wherein canon bruce is already swamped with guilt about janet's death and feels as though he OWES it to tim to save jack as well, it becomes all the more heartbreaking. i would actually change nothing about how it happened in canon. jack still leaves that phone call for tim, tim and bruce still race to get to him, tim still finds his father's dead body and bruce still holds tim away from the corpse.

because the best part about this potential relationship is that it is born from the shared want to look after tim. it's what connects them and what causes any sort of interaction between them. so even at this point, bruce's first priority is tim, because it will always be tim first, but also because that is what jack would have wanted from him.

just another love for bruce to hide in his heart, let it consume and damage him, let it make him colder and harder to approach, another layer on this already unbreakable foundation. it probably causes problems between tim and bruce, for the sake of mourning but not reacting and simply because loss can make people very unkind. bruce's guilt is now more than just what he already feels for somehow failing tim, but also for not being able to save someone he loves, again.

OR jack lives au and bruce is even MORE obsessed and insufferable about it and tim literally has to help his own dad break out of the manor because batman is holding jack hostage (bedrest for almost dying).

or we have our obligatory bruce wayne "I almost lost you, so now im going to push you away for both our sake" arc to which Jack drake probably threatens to shoot bruce again and then they do it silly HAPPY ENDING EVERYONE GO HOME

#me vs making up romance that isn't there but could be but probably not but WHAT IF #i didnt even mention the what if jack moved into the manor to recover post coma #or what if jack and bruce were together during no mans land #or short college romance jack and bruce #IM NORMAL #this is zafs fault tbh #bruce wayne #jack drake #tim drake

92 notes · View notes

l0v3-stay · 7 months ago

Text

THAT’S HOW WE MET

A Park Sunghoon ff.

Word count: 15k words

Chapters: 1 (2.5k words) 2 (2.7k words) 3 (2.9k words) 4 (2.7k words) 5 (2k words) 6 (2.1k words) 7 (13 words)

Pairing: Sunghoon x Reader

Tags/Warnings: Fluff, No smut, Suggestive, Lots of kissing, Neck kissing, Suggested pregnancy, fireworks, Sunghoon and reader just love each other too much ;) Lmk if I missed anything!!

A/N: Hellooooooo! Hope you'll like this story!! The pics of the chats are mine, but all the others aren't!! Credits to their respective owners!!

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱ Find me on AO3: L0V3_STAY

ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎ Find me on WATTPAD: l0v3_stay

₍��ᐢ..ᐢ₎ Comments, Feedback and requests are highly appreciated!! <3

ㅤ/ᐠ - ˕ -マ Have fun reading and take care <3

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 1

“ “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight…” These were the only words echoing in my head as my feet moved to the rhythm of the music. The CEO’s eyes pointed towards me as he carefully watched my every move, not missing out anything, not even how many times I blinked or breathed. Everyone was watching me, the choreographer, the lyricist, the producer, the CEO… All of their eyes pierced holes onto my skin as I tried not to let anxiety get to me. The music ended along with my dance as I posed, imagining I was an Idol already. Everyone clapped as I bowed elegantly, trying to look as confident as possible, as if I wasn’t being eaten from the inside out by my anxiety and uncertainty about the future and my performance.

“You can leave.” The CEO spoke coldly, so cold I thought he was mad about something I didn’t even know. Maybe my performance wasn’t good enough? Maybe I should’ve put more effort into my moves? I should’ve been more expressive? I don’t know, I won’t know until a few months later when the results will come out. For now, thinking about it and having anxiety attacks is useless, it will just make everything even worse.

I walked out of the structure slowly, my hands slightly shaking as if they were leaves being moved by the wind. I slowly made my way to a nearby cafe, one of my favorite cafes in the area and sat at a table near the window in the corner. My phone started vibrating inside my pocket, it was my best friend, Mina, calling me. I answered.

“How did the audition go, girly?”

Her voice made me feel like a kid receiving a candy, my heart melting like ice cream at the thought of having such an amazing friend. A friend like Mina was everything I had wished for when I was a kid. We’ve been friends since childhood and I still remember every detail of the moment I met her. We were at a friend’s pajama party and she had invited both of us. I was scared to go due to my sleep problems, but Mina was there to help with them even if we had just met. She sometimes sends me texts to remind me to take my melatonin and charge my speaker for the nights in which I turn on soft background songs to help me fall asleep. I get snapped back to reality as soon as I hear Mina’s voice through the phone again, this time sounding worried, probably scared about the fact that my audition might have gone the wrong way.

“Are you there, girl?” She asks, I know she’s fidgeting with something on the other side of the phone.

“Yeah, sorry” I pause for a second before speaking again, my voice reassuring “The audition went well, I think. The CEO sounded scary when he told me I could leave, even if I don’t know if he was mad about something. But hey, even if the results of my audition won’t be the ones we are hoping for, it was worth trying!” I say, trying to cheer her up, even if my nervousness was evident in my voice even through the call.

The rest was all small talk as Mina tried to distract me by talking about her new house in japan, about her new university and her part-time job as a babysitter during the weekends. She told me about one of the kids she babysitted in particular, Jihyoung, a korean child that had recently moved to japan. She told me how his favorite group was Enhypen too, just like me, and how he wished to become an idol when he was older. Mina also described his reaction when she told him that I was auditioning under the same company as Enhypen, it was hilarious.

A sigh escaped my lips as we ended the call, finally being able to grab a coffee for myself to ease the tiredness caused by my sleepless nights. As the waiter approached me with the coffee in his hand, looking extremely good, I’m not going to lie, a small smile formed on my lips. I took the coffee happily, thanking the waiter with a polite bow while warming my hands against the hot paper cup, before leaving, making my way to an ice skating rink.

I walked carefully in the huge crowd on the street, a soft breeze hitting my skin as I waited for the light to turn green to cross the road. My feet moved at the rhythm of an unknown tune in my head, the imaginary beat soft and slow, as if it should help ease my anxiety somehow. As I finally reach the ice skating rink, I notice a crowd of people all gathered around a van in front of the entrance of the structure. As I got closer, I noticed some members of the security asking me who I was and if I had the pass to enter the rink. I took out my wallet along with my pass that I had previously bought to be able to keep skating, even if my audition went wrong. They quickly moved to the side, letting me enter the structure without asking any more questions.

As I made my way towards the changing rooms, I noticed that I was alone except for a male skater already warming up on the ice. I enter the changing rooms, changing in a simple white skirt and a sporty, black sleeveless top. My skates white and neat, soft, black le warmers resting perfectly on my legs as I make my way to the rink.

As I made my way to the rink, I saw the male skater stopping and coming closer to my direction. I looked down just to notice a black, not too big, backpack on the floor, resting against the wall. I assumed it was his. As I look up again, his face is familiar.

I stare at him as gets closer, looking at his face more closely.

Park Sunghoon. THE Park Sunghoon.

I froze there in my place, staring at him with wide eyes. It’s like my mind went blank, not even realizing that he was now crouching right next to me, grabbing his water bottle from his backpack.

“Hello” He speaks, his voice sounding a little confused as I was still staring right at him. He slowly stands up, drinking some water from his bottle, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down in the hottest way possible, making me feel like a cube of ice melting.

“H-Hello” I answered, quickly averting my gaze as soon as I realized that I’ve been staring. I bow politely at him, regaining my composure.

“Seems like we’re alone here” He spoke with a slight chuckle, putting his bottle away, back into his backpack. “What’s your name?”

“Oh, I’m Y/N, it’s a pleasure to meet you!” I said and gave him a soft smile. Talking to him was already becoming easier, even if a glint of nervousness was never leaving me. I was talking to my idol after all.

“Y/N…” He repeated, clearly thinking “This name sounds so familiar” He said, and that’s when I felt anxiety quickly get to me.

“Oh, yeah… You’ve probably seen it on the posters with the people auditioning” My gaze was now directed towards the floor, my hand nervously scratching the back of my neck “I auditioned earlier, my dream is to become an Idol” I said again, trying my best to regain confidence.

His eyes sparkled at my words, causing some faint blush to appear on my cheeks. I felt my ears heat up, making me even more nervous as I was now aware of my red face.

“That’s amazing! Have you gotten the results already?” He asked excitedly, a wide smile on his face as he seemed interested in knowing more about me and my life, my dreams and my fears.

I shook my head, hinting a silent “No”. He pouted slightly, making a small smile form on my lips. “I’ll have the results in a couple days though, I think they’ll be announced on some posters in the building, too!” I spoke, trying to cheer him up.

He nodded before speaking again, this time making my eyes widen a little. “If you want I can give you my number, you know, in case you need any help or advice” He gave me a kind smile while taking out his phone. I couldn’t help but notice his wallpaper with a picture of him and the rest of the members along with ENGENEs at a concert. A soft smile crept on my lips as I took out my phone too, handing it to him. He took it, his vampire-like teeth showing through his smile at the sight of a picture of me with my little sister and Mina as my wallpaper. I glanced at his hands as he inserted his number into my phone with a smile. He saved himself as “Sunghoonie ;)”, causing a soft chuckle to escape my lips. I put my phone back into my own bag after he put his number in it, thanking him with a smile and a slight bow before he spoke again.

“Who were those in your wallpaper?” Curiosity was evident in his voice as he smiled at me, sitting down on a small bench near the rink and patting the spot next to him, inviting me to sit down.

“The child sitting on my legs is my little sister” I said, a soft smile on my lips as I continued “She’s 7 years old” I added, chuckling slightly.

“The other girl is Mina” I said, this time referring to the black-haired girl sitting next to me “She’s my best friend, I met her at a party when I was a kid” I looked over at him, who was now looking towards the floor but still carefully listened to my words.

“Oh, that’s good. Y’all are so pretty in that picture” He said, now facing me with a friendly smile. I felt my heart skip a beat and tried my best not to look like a tomato. I mumbled a quick “Thanks” before standing up, heading towards the rink.

“Should we get to skating?” I ask with a soft smile, trying to sound as stable as possible even if my sanity was about to throw itself out of the window after his compliment. Was I dreaming?

He stood up, walking to the rink with me as we got started skating. We were doing our own skating routines without interrupting each other, and I was grateful for that, also because he looked effortlessly handsome while skating.

I was attempting a new jump on the ice after warming up, but suddenly I don’t know what had gotten in me.

I slipped and fell,

the blade of my right skate hitting my left leg, leaving a bloody cut behind.

Sunghoon rushed to me, checking my leg. I swear I saw worry in his eyes at that moment, making my chest ache in both concern and embarrassment due to my fall.

“Wait, let me take you out of the rink…” He spoke, more to himself than to me, and picked me up. My heart was beating faster even through my pain, butterflies dancing in my stomach. He carried me out of the rink and put me down on the small bench where we were sitting earlier before he spoke again.

“I’ll get something to medicate that, okay? Don’t move” He said before running into the changing rooms. I didn’t even notice him taking his skates off to not risk falling and hurting himself too. He came back shortly after with a medikit, taking out a bandage and slowly wrapping it around my leg after disinfecting it. His touch was gentle yet firm, making sure the bandage was wrapped tight enough to stop the bleeding.

“Here” He spoke, sighing in relief “You scared me, you know?” He said, scolding me in a playful way. A smile appeared on my lips, it was genuine, I never felt so grateful before. We barely met and I was already comfortable with him.

“Sorry” I said with a slight laugh “Thanks though, I don’t know what I would’ve done if I were alone” I looked down, with an almost invisible smile before looking back up at him. “I guess no more skating for me today” I laughed at my statement, noticing a small smile appear on his lips too. It all felt like a dream, my leg hurt, but the rest of my emotions were covering the pain. The happiness, the nervousness, the gratefulness, the excitement, the adrenaline were covering everything.

“No more skating for me either” He said, sitting down next to me “I’m done with my routine and one of my friends wanted to play games with me at 7” He said, pointing to the time on his phone. It was 6.30pm.

I nodded, giving him a smile and slowly standing up, my leg hurting a bit. I was about to thank him and say bye but he cut me off.

“How are you going home?” He stood up too after putting his shoes on.

“On foot” I said, slightly confused. Why did that matter? Was he asking to make sure my leg was gonna be okay during the trip home?

“Oh no, you’re NOT going home on foot with that leg” He pointed at my bandage-covered leg, emphasizing the word “Not”. “I’ll take you home” He spoke, offering me his arm to help me walk. I tried telling him it wasn’t a problem at all, that my leg hurt just a bit and was nothing serious, but he insisted for me to go home with him.

We both got on the van, his bodyguards eyeing me along with the fans waiting for him outside. He made sure I got into the van without being pushed or hurt by the fans screaming and trying to be noticed by him. As we got in, he gave me a slight smile and in 10 minutes we were in front of my dorm’s door.

“Is this your dorm?” He asked, pointing towards my door. I nodded in response and he hummed before pointing at a door not far from mine “You know, that’s Sunoo’s room” My mouth fell open at his statement. One of my idols was literally 2 doors away from mine and I didn’t know? He chuckled at my reaction before glancing at the time on his phone.

“I guess I should go, I’ll let you be surprised by yourself” His words caused a laugh to escape my mouth and soft blush to creep on my cheeks.

“Wait” I said hurriedly “Thank you, Sunghoon” I gave him a grateful smile, and he smiled brightly in return.

“No problem” He said, pointing at his phone and hinting a silent “Call me if you need anything.

My heart thumped loudly in my chest as I plopped myself on my bed, exhausted from the long day I just lived. A long, but definitely amazing, day.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 2

“ I woke up to the sound of Given-Taken, the song I selected as my alarm before auditioning. My eyelids were heavy and my leg still hurt, but much less than yesterday. I slowly sat up, my hair messy and my back hurting a little from when I fell the previous day. I checked the time on my phone, it was 8am. My eyes traveled lower, where I noticed a notification by “Sunghoonie ;)”. I opened it, revealing a message that made me smile like an idiot. Was he always this sweet and caring?

I answered with a quick “Yup :3” before putting my phone down, kicking my feet with a red face and a wide smile on my face. Am I dreaming? No, this is all real.

I stood up lazily, making my way towards the small bathroom, washing my face and doing my skincare (Gurl’s looking fresh y’all) and heading back to my bedroom. I quickly got dressed, wearing some comfy clothes since I’ll be off to practice soon. I took a note in my mind to remember that I have to check the posters on my way, just to see if I got lucky and my audition’s result is already there

I ate an apple in the fastest way possible before rushing out of my dorm, and running towards the practice rooms. I even took the stairs so I didn’t have to wait for the elevator. I passed in front of a free practice room and left my water bottle there before making my way towards the posters in the main area of the building, my anxiety rising at each step. The sound of my shoes against the floor reminded me of bullets and the pain I would feel if I didn’t get accepted, making an unpleasant shiver run down my spine. As I saw the posters in front of me, I took a deep breath before looking for my name with shaky hands clung to my sweatpants.

Here it is,

No results yet.

I cursed under my breath, my heart pounding in my chest so loud that I thought even Mina would hear it from Japan. I made my way back to the practice room I saw earlier, but to my surprise it was now closed. I knocked on the door, hoping that it was just the wind or my memory playing tricks on me and I was the one who had closed the door. I already met Sunghoon yesterday, I’m not ready to meet other of my Idols yet.

I heard a faint “Come in” coming from inside the practice room and I slowly opened the door.

Please tell me it’s not an Idol,

Please, please, please, please,

…

It was an Idol.

Jungwon stood right in front of me, his phone in his hand, probably selecting the song he needs to practice.

“Sorry, I think I forgot my water bottle here earlier” I spoke, trying to control my shaky hands. It’s not my lucky day, is it?

“Oh, do you need help finding it?” He asked, his cat-like eyes now looking directly at me making me feel uneasy. I shook my head slightly and went over to the corner where I had previously left my bottle before speaking “Here it is” I held my bottle up, showing it to him with a smile.

He smiled back at me, walking a little closer “I never saw you around” He said curiously, indirecting asking me who I was.

“Oh, well, my name is Y/N. I auditioned yesterday” I said, and he looked at me making a conscious “Ahh” sound. “

“So you are the famous Y/N Sunghoon couldn’t stop talking about” I felt my heart drop at his words, but in a good way. Did I really leave such an impression on Sunghoon? Damn. I didn’t know how to respond, I was curious about what Sunghoon had said about me, but at the same time I didn't want to seem too interested or invasive.

Luckily, Jungwon interrupted my thoughts by satisfying my curiosity without me having to ask. “He said you are a really nice skater and that you’re really pretty, friendly and polite too!” He smiled at me, the same smile that was always plastered on his face in each video of each exhibition. The same smile that always made me smile too along with all the other smiles of the other members. I felt my heart beat faster at Jungwon’s words. Was that what Sunghoon actually thought of me?

“Oh, well, tell him he’s really friendly, kind and polite too! And also really good looking” I said the last part a little more shyly, trying my best not to let soft, pink blush flush on my cheeks.

Jungwon chuckled lightly at my words. I don’t know why but it’s easy to talk to him, I feel like he won’t ever judge me and I can tell him whatever I want. He’s always been one of my comfort places after all, always making a smile appear on my face even during hard times.

My thinking is quickly interrupted by his soft voice “What are you doing now?” He asked, sounding genuinely curious. I just shrugged before answering.

“I’m just going to look for an empty practice room, I guess” I said, scratching the back of my neck with a shy smile on my face. I still have a lot to practice…

“Oh, we can practice together if you want” He flashed me a bright smile before continuing with his usual, soothing tone of voice “Which song do you need to practice?” He asked, taking his phone out and connecting it to the speakers in the practice room.

“Oh, I need to practice Alexa’s ‘Back in Vogue’ ” I said, smiling back at him. Yesterday skating practice with Sunghoon and now dance practice with Jungwon? I must be dreaming. Someone wake me up.

“Okay, let’s do this!” He smiled again before starting the song to check if his phone had successfully connected and if the volume was right. He then put his phone down and went to the center of the room, gesturing to me to follow him. We started dancing, his moves were so clean and energetic. I had a lot to learn from him.

We danced for about 2 hours, both of us letting ourselves fall on the floor, tired after our practice. He was the first to stand up, grabbing his water bottle along with mine and bringing it to me. I sat up and thanked him before chugging half of the bottle down.

“Seems like someone was thirsty, huh?” He teased, wiggling his brows. I barely met him and it already seems like we’ve known each other for half our lives, what the hell? I chuckled at his teasing, standing up as he drank some water from his own bottle too.

“No but, seriously, Sunghoon was right” He said “You’re really pretty and also really friendly! And you also are really talented” I smiled shyly at his words, looking at my feet and the ground.

“Thanks” I mumbled, but before I could compliment him too, he spoke again.

“I would really like to get to know you more, you know? Maybe we could hang out sometime” He said, rushing to get his phone from the right corner of the room’s floor. He came back to me with a cute jog and showed me his number so I could add it into my phone.

I chuckled as he didn’t even ask if I was okay with all of this, already aware that I was, indeed, more than fine with it. Who would miss the chance to hang out with your idol? I took my phone and added his number in it, saving him as “Wonie :>”

After that we said goodbye to each other and we left the practice room. I went straight to my dorm and in the shower, warm water running down my skin as I rinsed my sweat away, trying to clear my mind from all the things that were happening. All the sensations cursing through my veins overwhelming my senses in the sweetest way possible as all my dreams are finally becoming true.

As I finally came out of the bathroom I changed into a simple but cute dress that hugged my body perfectly and dried my hair, tying it in a half-ponytail with a bow on it and little braids, tied together at the end, looking like a small crown at the back of my head.

I then proceeded to clean my room nicely so that it was neat and writing a song, then I practiced a bit with the piano and called Mina, telling her about everything that had happened these days: Me meeting Jungwon and Sunghoon, the way I fell, my cut, Sunghoon helping me and also giving me his number just like Jungwon.

I could feel Mina smiling through the phone and I could tell she was genuinely happy for me and that surely warmed my heart, making me aware that she’ll always be by my side no matter what.

After my almost endless call with Mina I checked my phone to see what time it was, it was 6pm. My eyes darted lower, noticing some notifications from both Jungwon and Sunghoon.

I felt my heart skip a beat as I opened the messages: Sunghoon just sent me a selfie and killed me with it and Jungwon was asking me to hang out with him, Sunghoon and Sunoo? I exhaled a breath I didn’t realize I was holding, my whole body tensing as I realized that I’m about to meet Sunoo, too.

I felt goosebumps raise all over my body as I realized what time it was: It was already 6.15pm. ‘I’m fucked’ were the only words playing in my head over and over, making me nervous. I ran to the bathroom, spraying some perfume on my neck and wrists, filling the air with my sweet scent, and also put on some makeup, a pretty light one, just some mascara, gloss and blush. Just to accentuate my natural features.

And in no time, it was 7pm.

I sat on my chair in front of my desk when suddenly someone knocked on my door.

I hesitantly stood up, walking towards the door.

Each step of mine making my heart beat louder,

So loud that it sounded like a gunshot every time,

So loud that when I opened the door I thought Sunghoon could hear it.

“Hey Y/N” His voice was like a bucket of ice being thrown right at me, bringing me back to reality. I quickly flashed Sunghoon a smile, acting like I wasn’t about to say bye to my sanity just seconds ago. I stepped out of the door, walking alongside him down the hall and towards the elevator.

“Hello Sunghoon” I say, sounding more tense than I intended to.

“There’s no need to be so tense, Y/N, calm down” He said with a light chuckle. We were trying to become friends after all. I shouldn’t be so tense, he’s right. But how am I supposed to not be tensed up when my idol, and also who I thought was and is the most handsome man in the world, is walking beside me and trying to become friends with me.

I flash him another warm smile as we reach the elevator, its doors closing behind us.

“So uhm…” The atmosphere in that small, moving box was thick and suffocating and I felt like I could faint due to the lack of oxygen in a couple minutes. “Was the one in the picture your dog?”

“Oh, yeah,” Sunghoon started, smiling brightly at me as I mention his dog “Her name is Gaeul”

I nod, happily listening to him and getting more curious by the second. As the elevator came to a stop and we made our way to the small sushi restaurant, and during all of our small trip he couldn’t stop talking about his dog, Gaeul. He told me her breed, the whole story of how he got her, her age and how much she has grown up since he first got her. It was cute, hearing him talking about something he liked made a strange warmth spread through my chest, filling my heart to the brim.

We slowly made our way through the crowd in the restaurant, coming to a stop as soon as we saw Jungwon waving at us from a table. We sat with them and that’s when I noticed a pretty, blond boy sitting right next to Jungwon,

Sunoo.

Kim Sunoo.

I greeted Jungwon before introducing myself to Sunoo, the usual “I auditioned yesterday to become an idol” leaving my lips right away, all while Sunoo was just flashing him that kind smile of his, the one I adored so much when watching their live performances.

I sat down between Sunoo and Sunghoon and we started a conversation along with Jungwon about figure skating as soon as they noticed the bandage on my leg from yesterday’s fall while skating with Sunghoon.

“I really like figure skating, but it’s really not for me” Sunoo said, and Jungwon nodded in agreement “I would fall as soon as I put foot on the ice” He added with the usual sassy laugh, causing a chuckle to escape my lips.

They were all easy to talk to as we shared anything that came to our mind just as if we’ve known each other for ages. It felt nice to have some new friends around. Some new friends that were also my idols, but still some new friends. My smile never fading as we shared experiences and stories, pouts and laughter, jokes and serious conversations. All of this while munching on some nice sushi, which never tasted this good in my life. Who knows, maybe it’s just the magical atmosphere lingering between us or maybe it’s just their presence to make the moment even more enjoyable.

Time passed by as fast as the wind between our chatting and the really nice sushi we were having. It all felt amazing, but eventually the evening had to come to an end, and that’s why I’m walking next to Sunoo as he brings me home.

He offered to accompany me home since we live in the same building.

Sunghoon had also offered to bring you home, making butterflies dance in my stomach, but Sunoo quickly said he would bring me home and that he didn’t have to worry.

During the trip I kept chatting with Sunoo about everything that crossed my mind, until…

Until we got to Sunghoon.

“He’s nice looking, right?” Sunoo asks, wiggling his brows playfully at me as if I hadn't met him just this night for the first time.

I shyly nodded, thinking about the selfie Sunghoon had sent me earlier with his dog. It was clear that he was laying in bed, his hair messy but soft-looking. He looked cute, yet hot as fuck. When I saw that picture I couldn’t help but let my mind wander a bit, also in places it shouldn’t have gone to. I shook those thoughts away as soon as I noticed how Sunoo was staring at me.

“I knew it, girl! It’s evident in the way you look at him” Sunoo said, making my cheeks become red. Was it really that evident? I hit Sunoo’s arm playfully as we got into the elevator to reach our floor. He chuckled in response before grabbing his phone and speaking.

“Mind if I get your number? I really loved talking with you tonight, we should meet up more often!” He said with that soft smile of his, making me melt because of his cuteness. I took my phone out too and saved his number in it as soon as we reached my dorm. “Sunoo-ie <3”. That’s how I saved him before waving goodbye.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 3

“About a month had passed since I went to the dinner that brought me to meet the people that became two of my best friends along with Mina: Sunoo and Jungwon. We hung out a lot since then, ending up knowing everything about each other. I also hung out with Sunghoon a lot, but we don’t know each other just as much as I do with Sunoo and Wonie.

Those two knew everything about me, from my favorite food to my sleeping problems and their solutions, from my most embarrassing moments to the most cheerful ones. They were always supportive to me and helped me whenever I had a problem, giving me advice and hugs to cheer me up whenever my mood was down.

They also knew about a little problem I had with Sunghoon.

As we hung out during the past weeks I noticed how a warm feeling spreaded all over my body whenever we touched, I felt butterflies in my stomach whenever we talked or even when we were close. The way he laughed or smiled at my silly jokes, the way he hugged me whenever we won a game or simply the way he listened to me when I was frustrated. I started to realize (Also thanks to Sunoo, Mina and Jungwon) that I was falling for him.

Or I already fell for him.

I was in love.

I was in love with Park Sunghoon,

And I still am.

As my mind was filled with thoughts, I didn’t realize I had received a text exactly from Sunghoon, the one permanently clouding my thoughts. I wonder if he’s tired after running in my mind for so long.

I could swear I felt my heart skip a beat at his messages, first he asks me to go to sleepover at his dorm, and then he tells me “I love when you call me that ;)” after I called him “Hoonie”... This guy is making me go crazy. The butterflies in my stomach weren’t stopping, I wanted to tell Sunoo and Jungwon and Mina about that message too, but I didn’t… I’ll tell them later. The other side of me though, was telling me to stay here, at my own dorm, due to my sleeping problems.

My fucking insomnia.

I couldn’t just take my melatonin right in front of him, or turn on music in my speaker to help get me to relax. It all just sounded so scary… What if Sunghoon found it weird? And what if he just told me to leave after? Oh god…

I decided to go shower to take all those consuming thoughts out of my mind, Sunoo said it himself “Sunghoon hyung is a really understanding person” when I texted him about the whole situation earlier.

I just got under the warm stream of water, feeling the pleasurable, burning sensation on my skin as it heated up so nicely… I wish it was Sunghoon keeping me this warm… Fuck Y/N what are you even thinking about? I curse mentally at myself for letting my own thoughts wander this much and I started to wash up quickly, using the sweetest shampoo and bodywash I owned (Under Jungwon’s advice since he told me that Sunghoon likes sweet things) before using a sweet-scented body lotion all over my body. I then changed into some cute clothes and did my hair, by the time it was already 7.30pm…

I looked at myself in the mirror at least 6 times, completely panicked and rethinking my outfit choices, but eventually settled to stay like this. My pink sweater and pink hair clip reminded me of some nice, sweet cotton candy. Sweet, Sunghoon likes sweet things and I do too.

I then sprayed some sweet perfume on my neck and wrists, went over my look one last time and grabbed my things: My skincare products, my pajamas, my toothbrush, my hairbrush, my perfume and clean clothes for tomorrow and, most importantly, my melatonin.

As soon as I took everything and checked the time, I noticed it was already 7.55pm. I rushed out and went all the way to Sunghoon’s dorm. I’ve been there a couple times, but never alone with him: Sunoo, Jungwon or both were always there with us when we hung out at Sunghoon’s dorm.

I took a really deep breath as soon as I reached his door, I could feel my heart beat faster in my chest, so fast that I thought it was going to stop at any second. I slowly knocked and he opened up almost immediately, as if he was waiting for me right on the other side of the door.

“Y/N-ieee” He spoke, almost whining and in the cutest way possible. He stepped to the side, letting me into his dorm. It was neat and clean, just as usual. The only difference was that on the bed there were extra pillows and extra blankets, reminding me that I would be staying the night and that I had to tell him about my problem with insomnia somehow tonight.

“Hey Hoonie” I gave him a bright smile, and I swear I saw a hint of blush on his cheeks. Maybe it was the nickname? Or maybe I’m just daydreaming, fuck my heart and mind.

“Call me that more, I love it” I swear I felt my heart skip a couple beats at his words, warmth spreading all over my body as I tried my best not to blush. I looked down at the floor, blushing more when I heard him chuckle slightly at me and mumble a small “Cute” to me as he closed the door to his dorm.

I looked up at him after calming down and he gave me a bright smile. I couldn’t help but notice the pictures hanging on the walls, some with him and the members, some with him and his dog and some pics of him while skating. He looked so effortlessly good in all of them that I wanted to scream. Some pictures were really touching as they showed him along with the rest of the members, one of them holding up an award; others were really funny, like one that showed him and Niki wearing Penguin onesies while forming a heart with their arms. All of those pictures prove the amazing friendship between all of them, the undeniable connection keeping them together growing stronger every time they hung out together.

I snapped back to reality by something scratching my leg. For a moment I thought it was Sunghoon playing some random joke on me, but when I looked down I noticed a cute, white fluff ball.

His dog.

A gasp escaped my lips at the cuteness as I dropped my bag on the floor and knelt down, caressing the dog’s white fur all over in the gentlest way possible.

“I see you and Gaeul already love each other, huh?” He teased from behind me, coming back from the small kitchen in his dorm. I didn’t even notice him going there, he probably went there when I was distracted with the pictures on his walls. He knelt down beside me with a bright smile, showing his vampire-like teeth so clearly that I thought I could faint right then and there.

I chuckled in response to his teasing, still caressing the dog in front of me. I stood up, gesturing to follow him. We sat on his bed after I moved my bag to a corner. The faint smell of his cologne lingering in the air as we sat close to each other on his bed, contemplating on what to do.

“Maybe we could play some games?” He suggested with a thoughtful expression “Or, if you’re good at baking, you could help me bake some cookies” He said with another smile.

“Why can’t we do both of them?” I asked with a laugh and he laughed along with me, butterflies dancing in my stomach as we shifted to the edge of his bed and he went to turn on his console and TV before handing me a controller.

We played games for a bit and he won every single game we played.

“Oh come on!” I whined as I lost another game and let myself fall back on his bed with a chuckle. He laughed at me as soon as he won. His laugh felt like therapy, it was contagious.

“You wanna stop? It’s no fun if I keep winning” He said with a shrug and a smile, letting himself fall on his bed next to me. I simply nodded and we both stood up again, making our way into his small kitchen.

He took out all the ingredients and then we got to making those cookies. We decided to make some simple chocolate chip cookies. As we cooked I couldn’t help but chuckle at him every time he spilled or dropped something, warmth filling my heart at all his small actions.

As we put the cookies in the oven he commented “Is that you smelling like cotton candy or what is it?” He asked, getting closer to me and leaning in. I could feel his hot breath on my neck as he smelled my perfume, letting it flood his lungs.

“It’s probably my perfume” I mumbled, my voice sounding shakier than intended. He slowly pulled back mumbling a small “So good” and looked directly into my eyes, making a shiver run down my spine. I shifted my gaze towards the floor to hide my blushing face.

“It is your perfume, yeah” He said with a smile. “It smells really good” He said with a warm smile, and time I’m sure he was blushing a bit too.

I jumped a bit when he gasped dramatically after looking at the time: It was already 9pm. I chuckled at his dramatic behavior as we decided to change into our pajamas and just get ready to sleep so we could play some board games and watch a movie without worrying about falling asleep by accident without getting ready first.

He went to the bathroom and changed first, coming back with a simple white t-shirt that was a bit too big for him and sweatpants. Then it was my turn. I made my way in the small bathroom and closed the door, noticing his toothbrush in a glass by the sink and his cologne right there on a small shelf along with all his skincare products. I changed into my pajamas, a simple set of matching pants and shirt with little bears on them, and let my hair down, passing a hand through it.

I then came out of the bathroom and Sunghoon clapped cutely at me “So cute!” He spoke, a soft smile playing on his flawless face and a glint of blush never leaving his cheeks. “Shall we brush our teeth and do our skincare? Maybe a face mask too?” He suggested with a smile, already walking back into the bathroom without even giving me time to answer. I quickly followed behind him getting back into the bathroom, this time with my bag in hand.

I took out my skincare products, placing them near the sink, while he looked for some masks to do. I took out my cleanser, my hydrating cream, my toner and my sunscreen. Just as I took everything out he turned to me with 2 face masks in his hands. He smirked at me and wiggled his brows playfully just as he showed them to me and we both burst out laughing. It was easy to talk to him, but will it be just as easy to tell him about my insomnia?

We did our skincare and brushed our teeth, his minty breath hitting my face every now and then as he helped me put the face mask on and I did the same, feeling my heart beat so fast and loud in my chest that I thought it was gonna explode as soon as my fingertips touched his silky, warm skin.

After that, we got back to his room and sat on the bed simply chatting a bit about random topics, just waiting for the moisture in the masks to be absorbed by our skin. We then took each other’s masks off, again feeling his minty breath and the urge to kiss him, before laying comfortably in his bed, our heads resting against the headboard and the too-many pillows he brought.

And then it comes, the moment I feared the most.

I had to take my melatonin and tell him about my sleeping problems,

About my insomnia.

I reached for my bag on the floor and took out my melatonin pills before speaking.

“Sunghoon, can I please get a glass of water..?” I ask, pointing to the small pill I had in my hand and signaling that I needed the water to take it.

He just looked at me with a confused expression and nodded before standing up and walking to the kitchen, coming back with a glass of water and handing it to me before asking me the question I was so scared of “What are those pills?” He spoke, his voice barely above a whisper and clearly filled with concern.

“They’re melatonin pills,” I said, looking down. “I suffer of Insomnia” I added with a sigh and a sad expression, already knowing this will be one of those sleepless nights due to the unfamiliar surroundings.

“Oh” He said, his pretty eyes filled with worry, making my heart shatter into a million pieces “Is there any way I could help you sleep?” He asked, making my heart beat faster. Sunoo was right, he was definitely an understanding person, and that fueled my feelings for him even more.

“I usually turn on some soothing music to help me fall asleep, but that might bother you” I answered, my eyes never leaving the blankets on top of my legs “Or I hug a pillow, that would be a nice option if you have an extra one” I added, now looking up at him with shy, hesitant eyes.

“I do have an extra pillow, but I don’t think it’ll fit between us” He said, pointing to the small space between our bodies, the closeness between us making me shiver “You can hug me, though” He added, and that’s when I swear I felt my soul leave my body, drifting off into the sky and never coming back. Or maybe it was his soul drifting right into my heart so I’ll never be able to stop loving him, who knows.

“Are you sure that’s okay with you?” I asked, surprisingly sounding steady enough. His words “You can hug me, though” playing in my head over and over again.

“Yeah, I’m more than okay with it” He said with a shrug before turning his TV on and looking for a movie on Netflix. Soft blush creeped on my cheeks but I was good enough to look away for a moment and hide it.

He suddenly turned to me and asked “Is this movie okay?” He pointed to the TV on the other side of the room, a romantic movie on it. I thought of suggesting a horror one so that whenever a jumpscare comes I could cling to him, but since we both hate them I changed my mind and just accepted. If he did like horror movies I would’ve asked for one even if I hate them.

As the movie played, kissing scenes kept showing every now and then, making us both giggle like some stupid children, but even between our playful banter, I swear I noticed him shifting closer to me every time I was distracted.

The movie seemed to end really fast, as if it was only 10 minutes long. I guess it’s because time seems to pass by faster when I’m having fun.

After he turned the TV off, he turned to me and asked softly in a tired, yet really fucking hot voice “Do you wanna sleep?”

I just nodded in response, sliding down until my head was resting on the pillow instead of the headboard, and looked at him, hesitance clear in my eyes as I spoke “Are you sure I can hug you?” My voice barely above a whisper as I spoke shyly.

“Of course” He gave me a soft smile, the softest smile I’ve ever seen and that made me want to pinch his cheeks and kiss him like there was no tomorrow “And wake me up if you can’t sleep, you’re not alone in this”

His words made me melt, literally, I was sweating. He was so sweet that I swear I smelled a scent so close to cotton candy that it made my mouth water.

I slowly shifted closer to him, my head resting on his chest and my arm over his stomach.

He was warm, really warm.

And his heartbeat made me relax, I felt sleepy already.

But just as my own heartbeat started to slow down, relaxing, he wrapped his arm around my waist, making it beat faster once again. Even faster than before.

I felt safe, secure. I relaxed again as soon as he turned the lights off and whispered a soft “Good night, Y/N”.

His strong arms fit perfectly on my waist, making me feel safer than usual. I closed my eyes after whispering a small “Good night” back to him. My breathing slowing down and matching his,

I start to feel sleepy,

Sleepier and sleepier,

Until I finally left the hearth and traveled to dream land, Sunghoon never leaving my side,

Keeping me close,

Keeping me warm,

Keeping me safe.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 4

“ I woke up feeling a pair of strong arms wrapped around me, my head resting on a warm surface that made a heart beating noise. I slowly opened my eyes just to see that…

Park Sunghoon was the one hugging me.

My head was laying on his chest.

His heart was the one I was hearing.

His breathing was the one matching mine.

He was the one keeping me warm all night long.

He was the one that gave me the best sleep of my life.

I felt my heart beating faster at the sight of his sleepy face as I stared at him, all while enjoying the warm and safe feeling his embrace gave me.

I got startled when I felt him shifting underneath me, his eyes slowly opening as I lifted my head from his chest to look at him, his sleepy face being the cutest thing I’ve seen so far.

“Good morning” He spoke, his voice low and deep, groggy from sleep. I shivered as he moved his arm lower, from my waist to my hips, holding me close as we laid together in the warm embrace of the blankets.

“Good morning…” I replied shyly, looking away as I felt my face heat up, sure that I looked like a tomato ready to be eaten.

“Lay with me some more, please” He whispered, pulling me even closer to him and making me shiver under his touch. I rested my head on his chest again, enjoying the closeness between our bodies. His slow breathing made me relax and cream against him.

“How did you sleep?” He asked, now sounding a bit concerned as he knows about my problems with sleep.

“I slept really well, this was probably one of my best nights so far” I gave him a smile as I spoke, a wide one, a genuine one as I was truly happy that I was finally able to sleep all night long without waking up in the middle of sleep. And also truly happy that I slept cuddled up against my Idol and crush’s side, in his embrace.

He smiled back at me, making me wish to kiss that smile until my lips bleed.

He jumped up when his phone started ringing, it was “Jaikeu :]” . The cute name made me giggle. He sat up a bit, not letting me go as he answered the call.

“Hey Jake” He spoke, a wide smile painted on his oh-so-kissable lips.

“Hi” I heard from the other side of the phone. I could only imagine it was Jake, or the one and only Shim Jaehyun. “I know you’re busy with your ‘Girlfriend’- Sorry, with Y/N, but our Kid Nishimura Riki wants you to be here too” Jake spoke through the phone and I choked when he called me Sunghoon’s girlfriend. He then spoke in a cute voice “Do you wanna hang out with us today? We could play games at my place” Jake spoke, clearly pouting from the other side of the phone.

Sunghoon looked at me and probably understood that I heard the whole conversation they just had. He silently mouthed to me the words “Do you wanna come too?” and I just nodded with a shrug. I would meet 2 more of my idols after all, so why not?

“Okay, sure” He paused for a moment at the phone before continuing “Can Y/N come too?” I heard Jake answer with a quick “Yes” from the other side before they agreed on the time in which we had to meet and hung up with a bright smile.

“Today, 3pm, Jake’s dorm” He said, rubbing my back gently. I smiled back, feeling truly happy for once in my life. I nodded and sat up along with him.

“I’ll go get dressed, okay?” I asked, slowly getting out of bed before whispering. “Sunghoon,” He nodded and turned to me as soon as I whispered his name, looking at me deep in the eyes with his expressive ones “Thank you” He just smiled at me, in his eyes a silent ‘You can always vent to me’.

I headed towards the bathroom, closing the door behind me and wearing the spare clothes I brought with me before doing my skincare and hair.

I then sprayed some perfume I brought with me (The sweet one, the one Sunghoon likes) and headed out. He stared at me, his mouth hanging slightly open.

“So pretty” He said, giving me a warm smile and standing up, heading to the bathroom himself. “And you smell good too, as always”. I blush softly at his compliments, a small chuckle going past my lips.

I watch him as he disappears into the bathroom before coming back after a while, all fresh and dressed up with a light blue shirt and some simple, black jeans. He looked so elegant and expensive even if he was dressed up in a casual way.

I grabbed my bag and gathered my things. I can’t wait to tell Sunoo and Jungwon about all of this, but all this tea is too important to be spilled over a chat, I’ll tell them when I see them.

I checked my phone and, just as I was thinking of him, Sunoo texted me a quick “How did it go” and a “How did you sleep?” I replied with a quick “It went well, I’ll tell you more when I see you <3” and locked my phone.

During all of this, Sunghoon was desperately looking for his phone. He used it earlier when Jake called but now he couldn’t find it.

“Sunghoo-” My words were cut off by him speaking.

“Shit, I can’t find it!” It was clear, he was getting frustrated.

“Sungho-”

“WHY?!” He whined, interrupting me once more.

“PARK SUNGHOON” He finally looked at me as I spoke in the calmest tone ever “Look what’s in your hand” I pointed at his left hand.

He was holding his phone during all of this, this silly, yet charming and sweet, boy. He looked down at the phone in his hand, then at me, then back at the phone and then back at me, this time with a laugh that made my heart swell with affection.

He finished gathering his things before we headed out for lunch, going to the same small place where I met my best friend: Sunoo. We sat down and ate normally, talking about any sort of thing that went through our mind: My insomnia, his dog, dogs and animals in general, dance practices, auditions, Jay’s cooking and food.

As we finished, I offered to pay but he stopped me, handing his card to the waiter before I had time to say anything. When I scolded him as we were getting out of the restaurant, he used the excuse of “I’m an Idol, I have way more money than you”. How silly.

As we made our way to Jake’s dorm, we passed in front of the posters with the people auditioning and… The results. Finally. I stopped in my tracks, running towards the posters right away, and started looking for my name between a lot of others.

Until I found it.

Y/N.

Next to it, the result was written.

‘Audition passed’.

I felt my heart beat faster in joy, I was so happy that I didn’t notice Sunghoon running behind me and stopping to stand beside me, watching me as I jumped like a kid on their birthday. He hugged me as soon as he saw my result, jumping with me.

“I’m so proud of you, Y/N-ah!” He said as he hugged me tighter, reminding me of the previous night, when we slept in each other’s arms and I actually did sleep.

A small tear of joy ran down my face as we hugged, a big smile plastered on both our faces. “Thank you, Sunghoon-ah!” I answered, looking at him deep in the eyes before hugging him tight again. My face buried in his neck, his intoxicating scent filling my lungs.

After a bit of jumping around, we started walking again, making our way to Jake's place. If I thought I’d feel anxious to meet him and Niki, I was actually pretty relaxed. Maybe it was because I was with Sunghoon? Or maybe because I knew I passed my audition? I don’t know, but it doesn’t matter right now as we finally reached Jake’s dorm.

Sunghoon knocked on the door. After not even 2 seconds a screaming Niki opened it. I jumped a bit when Niki jumped in Sunghoon’s arms screaming “JAKE HYUNG WANTS TO TICKLE ME TO DEATH”. Both me and Sunghoon burst out laughing as soon as we saw Jake leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest as he looked at Niki with a playful smirk on his face,

When Niki turned around and looked at Jake he screamed again, but when he noticed me he stopped clinging to Sunghoon and just normally introduced himself, as if he didn’t just scream his lungs out because Jake was trying to tickle him. “Hey, I’m Niki, you must be Y/N, nice to meet you” He said, offering me his hand for a handshake.

I then looked at Jake and he introduced himself too “And I’m Jake” He gave me his usual, contagious smile, the one I used to go crazy for in their videos.

I also introduced myself, but this time as a trainee, mentioning that I passed my audition.

We made our way into Jake’s dorm, it was way messier than Sunghoon’s, but still not too dirty or messy. I was honestly a little surprised: I thought his dorm was going to be a mess after seeing Niki scream and run like that.

We all sat on Jake’s bed, playing some video games at first but getting bored after a couple matches. That’s when we decided to play truth or dare all together.

“Niki, truth or dare?” Sunghoon asked Niki, and he thought for a moment before answering with a confident “Dare”.

“I dare you to tickle Jake for 30 seconds to get your revenge” Sunghoon spoke with a chuckle, making butterflies dance in my stomach more and more. I laughed when I saw the expression on Jake’s face. He side eyed Sunghoon so bad I thought his eyes were going to turn around completely. Not even Sunoo ever side eyed anyone like that. Niki, on the other hand, was smiling a lot and giggling like a 3-year-old.

Niki counted to 3 and jumped on Jake, tickling him all over and almost making them both fall off the bed. Jake was a screaming mess too now, repeating ‘Sorry’ over and over again while laughing his soul out. Me and Sunghoon counted the 30 seconds while laughing, making me feel warm, but definitely happy, all over.

As the 30 seconds were up, Niki asked “Jake, truth or dare?”

Jake answered right away with a convincing “TRUTH”. He knew that, if he chose dare, Niki would dare him to do the most embarrassing thing ever (These dumb children).

Niki whined but still asked Jake a dare “Do you think Y/N is pretty?”

I felt my cheeks heat up a little bit at Niki’s question, but I became a literal tomato when Jake nodded. I looked at Sunghoon and I’m sure that what I saw in his eyes was jealousy, somehow. He was piercing holes in Jake’s skin with how intensely he was staring at him.

Jake just glanced at Sunghoon and then looked down, as if he was saying sorry. After that, he spoke, “Sunghoon, truth or dare?”

Sunghoon thought about his answer for a moment before speaking, “Dare”. He didn’t look too confident about his choice, but he also didn’t look too hesitant.

“I dare you to whisper something in Y/N’s ear”, Jake said. And in that moment I swear this time Sunghoon’s ears and cheeks turned red, as if he just ate something really spicy. Jake giggled a bit at his friend’s reaction and wiggled his eyebrows teasingly. What did he know that I wasn’t aware of?

My thoughts came to a stop when Sunghoon shifted closer to me and leaned in, his hot breath on my neck and right ear. “I ate Sunoo’s cookies yesterday, but don’t tell him, please” He whispered. His whisper was hot as fuck, his breath hitting my neck and I could smell his strong scent, my vision going fuzzy for a moment. Even if the words he said were stupid as heck, he still sounded really hot. Goosebumps raised all over my skin, I stopped breathing for a moment and butterflies danced in my stomach with all their strength. My chest felt warm, just like my stomach did. I felt warm all over, my mouth going dry.

“Someone looks flustered” Niki teased, referring to me. I glanced at me, with the amazing side eye Sunoo taught me how to do, and whispered under my breath “Shut up you kiddo”.

Sunghoon and Jake both burst out laughing, Niki started laughing because the other two were laughing and I started laughing because they all were laughing. What a chain reaction.

The rest of the day passed by rather fast between silly jokes and games, laughter and whines (Especially by Niki, that hyperactive child).

Sunghoon brought me back to my dorm at about 6pm, my heart dropping into my stomach as I had to say goodbye to him, closing the door behind me as I passed past my door. I swear I saw a glint of sadness in his eyes too as I closed the door, making me even sadder.

I quickly texted Sunoo to come over, I had to tell him EVERYTHING that had happened. From the sleepover to the cuddles, from Jake’s call to his dare for Sunghoon. Everything. Every single detail.

Sunoo didn’t even answer and directly knocked on my door. I opened it and we greeted each other with our usual hug and sat on my bed.

“Spill the tea girl” He said, leaning in closer and raising an eyebrow at me with a smirk.

I just told him everything, Sunghoon’s reaction to my insomnia, what we did, that we slept hugging each other, Jake calling me Sunghoon’s girlfriend while on a call with Sunghoon, Niki’s screams and whined, how I met them and all the game of truth or dare, everything in the most detailed way possible. I also told him that I passed my audition and a big, warm smile formed on his lips. I didn’t tell him about Sunghoon and the cookies, though.

It was now 8pm. Did it really take me this long to tell him everything? Damn. We hugged one last time before he spoke softly “You’re really whipped for him, aren’t you?” He asked with a soft chuckle.

“I swear when he smiles I forget how to breathe” I answer and we say bye to each other.

After Sunoo left, I washed up and ate some quick noodles before going straight to bed, tired from the long day that I just lived.

I slept well that night, Sunghoon never leaving my mind as I fell asleep hugging my usual pillow, this time thinking it was him.

For the next four months we just kept hanging out all together and I noticed Sunghoon sticking to me a bit more than usual, but I didn’t really pay attention to that.

It was now December, and I had already prepared Sunghoon’s birthday gift. 2 tickets to go see fireworks on the 10th December. One for him and the other for whoever he wanted to go with. I also had already fantasized about that extra ticket to be given to me, but I knew it would never happen, sadly.

I sat on the bed after practice and checked my phone, my heart beating faster and my breathing coming to a stop at the messages I saw.

CHAPTER 5

The so-long-awaited day arrived, Sunghoon’s birthday party was going to be today at 6pm. A shiver ran down my spine at the thought of meeting Heeseung and Jay too as Jungwon had told me they would come. I sat on my bed, thinking about what to wear. My mind soon drifted to something, or more like someone, else.

Sunghoon.

So many questions ran through my mind whenever I heard his name. Should I confess my feelings? Should I not say anything? Should I flirt and try to get him to love me back? Does he love me back just like Sunoo said?

Yes, Sunoo said that Sunghoon probably loves me back. Sunoo said Sunghoon never stops talking about me and that his eyes light up every time he hears my name. Sunoo said that Sunghoon always wants to hang out with me but doesn’t ask that much because of his busy schedule and because he doesn’t want to be a bother for me either.

Sunoo told me so many things about Sunghoon that I started to love him even more.

I shook my head, coming back to my senses. It was already 4pm. Shit.

I ran to the bathroom and took a shower (ofc using the sweetest-smelling soaps I owned) and used my usual, sweet lotion all over my body. I then started looking for the right clothes. I needed something comfortable since I knew Niki was going to drag me all around the house and Jungwon was gonna chase me to tickle me.

I wore some simple, golden jewelry and sprayed some sweet perfume all over, making sure to smell good all night.

I then wore some simple, white sneakers and headed out, making my way to Sunghoon’s dorm.

As I got there, I could hear talking and laughing from inside. I knocked on the door, and as it opened, an elegantly-dressed Sunghoon was staring directly down at me with a small smile.

“Hey Y/Nnnie!” He said, pulling me in a friendly hug. I swear I felt him take a deep breath directly against my neck before whispering a soft “You smell so good, so sweet…”

I shivered at his muttered words before answering his greeting “Hi Hoonie” I said with a small chuckle. As he let me go from the hug, he dragged me all the way to the main area where the party was, in his small living room. As I arrived there, I saw some drinks on the table along with some snacks and plates already placed carefully in front of 8 chairs. I look around until I feel two arms wrapping around me and…

“Y/N JAKE-HYUNG WANTS TO TICKLE ME HELP” Niki screamed in my ear as Jake rushed to us, tickling Niki and making him pull away from me, running towards the bathroom.

I looked around, the walls neatly decorated with some penguin drawings and more pictures, on Sunghoon’s bedside table was resting a beautiful bouquet of flowers. Wait, flowers? Who were they for? I shook those thoughts out of my mind, looking towards the small couch where…

Where Heeseung was chatting with Sunoo. The Lee Heeseung.

“Y/N!!” Sunoo exclaimed and jumped up, rushing towards me and pulling me into a hug. I looked behind him, Heeseung had stood up, walking towards us with his usual flirty-like demeanor.

“Hi Sunnie” I say, reciprocating Sunoo’s hug. I smile as he lets me go, looking back at Heeseung who was now extending his hand towards me.

“Hi, I’m Heeseung” He said, and I gladly took his hand in a polite handshake.

“I’m Y/N” I answer with a smile. I look back as I feel a hand on my shoulder, to be more precise, Sunghoon’s hand.

“Guys, food is ready” He said with a warm smile. It was so warm that it went in contrast with his cold-like features, but they surely created a perfect match.

We all follow him to the table and sit down. I took my place between Sunoo and Jungwon, Sunghoon sitting in front of me. I look towards the kitchen just to see Jay coming with some plates, a wide smile on his face as he hummed to an unknown lullaby stuck in his head.

He immediately put a plate in front of me, I was the first one being served, apparently.

“Ladies first” He said with a wink before speaking again “I’m Jay, but I bet you already know” He said with a smile.

“I’m Y/N and-” My words are cut off by two long whines, one from Sunghoon and the other from Niki.

“The birthday boy should go first!” Sunghoon protested with a cute pout.

“No, the youngest should!” Niki answered with another whine.

Me and Jay looked at each other before laughing. As we calmed down, Jay spoke again. “No, ladies first” He said, winking at me once again.

“Yah Jay stop flirting” Heeseung said from the other side of the table.

Jay side eyed him and walked back to the kitchen, grabbing more food until everyone was served.

And until Niki finally stopped whining.

“This is really good” I say, looking towards Jay and pointing to the stir-fried rice in front of me. “Did you cook it?” I ask, still looking towards Jay. He smiled at me, a satisfied expression on his face as he nodded, silently answering my question.

I noticed Sunghoon staring at him in a stern way, as if he was going to kill him at any moment. I took another bite of my rice and chewed on it happily while Niki kept annoying Heeseung by stealing his rice from his plate.

Dinner time went by rather fast, all between chuckles, Jay’s homemade food and Niki’s whines and jokes.

It was now 9pm and we were all talking and chatting with each other, Niki dragging me all around Sunghoon’s dorm and explaining the backstory of each one of the pictures hanging on his walls.

Sunghoon came to me every once in a while, trying to talk to me, but whenever he said “Y/N, can I talk to you for a second?” Niki dragged me somewhere else. I also noticed Sunoo and Jungwon cheering Sunghoon up and pointing to me while talking with him, but I didn’t really pay attention to that.

When the time to open the presents arrived, Sunghoon sat happily on the center of the small couch while the rest of us sat on the floor or next to him.

The first present was Jake’s, which had gifted Sunghoon a shirt with ‘ice prince’ written on it, then Jay’s, who had gifted him a simple necklace, then Heeseung’s, which was a prada bag, then Niki’s, that was a new game for his nintendo switch (And that kid wrote his name in the wrong way on the card: Kimura Nirisi. It was Heeseung that had to correct him right then and there reminding him that his name was actually Nishimura Riki), then Sunoo’s and Jungwon’s, who both gifted him shirts with two of their pictures on them, and then mine.

I gave him two tickets to go see fireworks. One for himself and one to give to whoever he wanted to go with him.

“Thank you everyone!” He said with a bright smile, adjusting his pointy, birthday hat on his head. We all pulled each other in a group hug, Niki whining that he ‘couldn’t breathe due to Jay’s armpits smelling bad’.

We just chatted for the rest of the evening. Sunghoon tried dragging me to the side a couple times to tell me something, but everytime one of the other members pulled me away from him.

As we were all saying bye to each other, I was the last one to exit. Sunghoon stopped me by the door, holding my wrist in a gentle, yet firm, way.

“I want you to have this,” He said, handing me the extra ticket for the fireworks. “I want to go with you” He added, a soft smile on his face even if I could see a hint of nervousness in his eyes. I took the ticket, putting it into my small bag, nodding softly.

“I’ll be there” I reassure him, flashing him a smile. As I got home, I did my usual night routine, brushing my teeth and doing my skincare before changing into my Pj's and heading to bed.

That night nothing seemed to help me sleep, my melatonin seemed to not even have an effect on me, soft background music didn’t help and not even hugging my pillow helped. I jumped up, fully awake once again, as soon as I heard my phone buzzing repeatedly.

I look over at it, an incoming call from “Sunghoonie ;)”. Sunghoon calling me? Maybe I forgot something there?

I answer, a sleepy “Hi” coming from my lips.

“Hi” He said, he sounded nervous yet sleepy, and god if his voice was hot like that. “I can’t sleep and you came to my mind… Did I wake you up?” He asked, probably knowing that I wouldn’t be able to sleep after talking with so many people not even an hour ago, kept up by the adrenaline coursing through my veins.

“No, no, I can’t sleep either, you didn’t wake me up” I answer, laying back down, putting my phone on speaker and setting it down next to me as I snuggle in the soft, fluffy and warm sheets of my bed. “Why can’t you sleep?”

“Sleeping is hard when you have so much on your mind” He answered, I could hear the shuffling of his sheets from the other side, probably placing his phone next to himself on speaker like me.The image of him, laying in bed, all snuggly and cute while talking to me on the phone causing goosebumps to raise all over my skin, butterflies dancing elegantly in my stomach.

“Why? What’s on your mind?” I ask, my voice soft and understanding as I hope he won’t notice that part filled with pure, unfiltered love.

“You” He simply said, I felt a sudden rush of warmth run up my neck and my face. I probably looked like a tomato. My heart was beating louder and faster, I felt like I could die right then and there as I held my breath without even noticing, millions of thoughts running through my mind at an inhuman speed.

Probably due to my lack of response, he spoke again “Can we stay on a call while we sleep? Your breathing is relaxing…” He said, I could sense the sleepiness in his words, he was probably falling asleep already, while my heart was beating fast as fuck, my breathing was heavy and his words made me shiver and blush like an idiot.

“Of course” I said, trying to sound stable, as if I wasn’t just kicking my feet on my bed while hiding my face in my hands.

After a couple minutes, I couldn’t hear anything anymore, the only sounds coming from his side were the soft shuffling of the sheets and his soft breathing. The image of him sleeping softly formed in my mind, making my heart swell with love and affection as I laid my head back against the pillow, while having another one there to hug. I wonder what he’s dreaming about, I bet he looks so peaceful in his sleep.

I wrapped my arms around my pillow, of course imagining it being him, all cuddly and warm, and, soothed by his soft breathing which was more like a lullaby to me, while thinking about when we’ll go see the fireworks together, slowly fell asleep with him clouding my mind in the best and sweetest way possible. My own side of the phone call became silent too, the only sounds being my heart beating loudly for him and my soft breathing, along with some casual rustling of my own warm, comforting sheets.

CHAPTER 6

“ After 2 long, tiring, intense and full days passed by, it was finally the so-awaited day of the fireworks. Me and Sunghoon agreed that he would pick me up and we would go there together at 9pm, the show would start at 10. During the day I met up with Sunoo and Jungwon, of course gossipping and talking about how this evening could possibly go. We were sitting in a cute cafe, just talking.

“You know, I saw a bouquet of flowers on Sunghoon’s bedside table” Sunoo started with a small smirk “I think he’s gonna give it to you”

I quickly shook my head, chuckling a little at how stupid his words are. Why would Sunghoon give those flowers to me? I love him, yeah, but he doesn’t feel the same, and I’m sure about that. I quickly denied, shaking my head, a well hidden hint of sadness in my voice, “Nah, I don’t think so”.

“Oh, come on, Y/N!” Jungwon joined in, nudging my shoulder in a comforting manner, as if he was able to sense my sadness, as if he was able to sense how broken and hurt my heart was. “Stop speaking so lowly of yourself! I’m sure Sunghoon might actually like you back!”

“Jungwon, I don’t like him, I fucking love him” I say, turning to him in a dramatic way, trying to lighten the mood up a little. The other two just giggled a bit, and then we changed topic, just simply talking about random shit: From their upcoming comeback to my training and possible debut next year.

When I got home, I felt goosebumps raise all over my skin as I saw the time. 7pm. I rushed to shower, applying that sweet lotion that had become a must, and then changing. I decided to dress up casual yet elegant, adding a cute, silky, black bow to my hair.

I sprayed my now usual sweet perfume before gathering my things, my ticket, my phone, my wallet and some makeup products in case I needed any touch ups. I sat on my couch and waited for Sunghoon to arrive patiently, my heart racing in my chest, goosebumps rising on my skin and a cocktail of emotions cursing through my veins: Anxiety, excitement, happiness and pure, unfiltered love, adoration and affection.

I got snapped back to reality when I heard a knocking sound coming from my front door. I stood up, my knees weak, my hands shaky as they clung to my bag’s handle. I opened the door and there, right behind it, stood a tall, nice yet nervous looking Sunghoon.

Why was he nervous, though?

“Hi” He said, his greeting was shakier and more spent than usual. I couldn’t help but notice how he avoided eye contact, how his free hand clung to the hem of his jacket…

Wait,

Free hand?

Where’s the other one?

It was straight in front of me, holding that same bouquet I saw at his birthday, the same bouquet Sunoo and Jungwon told me about.

So it was actually for me…

He was also holding a letter…

“I’ve never been good at telling people how I feel,” He started, a hint of vulnerability in his voice as he handed me the letter and the flowers with a shaky hand. “But you make me want to try”

I flashed him a small, shy smile and he responded with one too, but quickly stopped me when I tried opening the letter. “Wait! I’ll tell you when to open it”

I shrugged lightly and put the letter in my bag and then went out, locking my door. I followed him outside the building and the car, where one of his staff members was. Sunghoon had told me over text that one of the staff members would drive for us.

As we arrived at our destination, the ‘driver’ dropped us down and told us to call him whenever we wanted to go home and also that we deserve to have some fun too.

I walked beside Sunghoon and couldn’t help but notice how his hand twitched whenever I walked too close to him, as if he wanted to touch or grab something. He was probably too shy, though, so I decided to take the lead in this.

“Wanna hold hands?” I asked, offering him my hand with a warm smile, “If it’s not too cheesy, of course” I added with a laugh, and I swear I went straight to heaven when he took my hand with a bright smile and the most beautiful laugh ever.

When we arrived near the lake where the firework show will be at, the security stopped us and asked for our tickets. We both took them out and showed them to the security before making our way past the fences.

We sat down on a bench pretty close to the lake, flowers surrounding us, the stars and moon already shining in the sky, casting a soft glow over his skin, making him look ethereal.

“You know,” He spoke, his voice soft and I could feel the small glint of vulnerability in it despite him seeming more confident now. “You’re like the stars, beautiful to look at, but impossible to catch”

A hurricane of feelings and sensations cursed through my veins at those words: Shivers running down my spine from the cold, my cheeks heating up a bit, the wind through my hair, my heart beating faster, his eyes on me, the nature around us, the soft trickling sound of water coming from the lake, soothing me deeper into this intense feeling of pure, raw, unfiltered love.

“Are you cold?” He asked again, now his cheeks are of a soft shade of pink too. He didn’t give me time to answer and just took his jacket off, draping it over my shoulders, drowning me in his scent and warmth.

“Thank you…” I mumbled in response, too shy to say anything else, overwhelmed by his strong scent filling my lungs, coming from both him and his jacket.

We both look up at the sky when we hear a loud ‘pop’ sound.

The fireworks.

So pretty.

They’re like my love for him, burning and exploding in uncountable little lights of adoration, affection and care.

As they explode, I turn to look at him,

His eyes already piercing holes through my skin,

They meet, our eyes,

We get closer,

And closer,

Impossibly closer,

His breath fanning over my lips, hot and minty, addicting,

His hand caressing my jawline

As our lips meet.

I could taste his cherry chapstick on his lips, the faint mint of his toothpaste, and his unique, intoxicating taste.

He was everywhere, in my mind and heart, tattooed in my soul.

His tongue danced with mine with passion,

Pure,

Raw,

Unfiltered,

LOVE.

His scent was everywhere, filling my lungs and nostrils, his touch causing goosebumps to raise all over my skin.

It all felt so good,

So fucking good,

Intoxicating,

Addicting,

Until…

Until it stopped.

Until we broke the kiss, panting for air.

But the only thing I could breathe was his scent, the only things I could feel were his lips on mine and his touch.

We stared at each other until he broke the eye contact, pointing towards my bag,

“Open the letter” He said, his voice breathless, shaky, I could sense how overwhelmed he was by all these feelings, too.

I took the letter and opened it, my hands shaking, my heart beating loud and fast against my chest, my breath hitching.

“I fell in love with the million things you didn’t know you were doing, your flaws, your imperfections, your mistakes, all of you. Suddenly, all the love songs were about you, and you became the ‘nothing’ I say when people ask me what I’m thinking about. I swear when you smile I forget how to breathe. I have so, so, so much love for you in my heart that it doesn’t fit.

-Sunghoon”

Those were the words written in his letter,

So simple, yet so meaningful.

I looked up at him,

Tears in his eyes, overwhelmed by all those sensations,

Tears in my own,

My hands moving to cup his cheeks, wiping his tears with my thumbs,

“I love you”, I said.

And that’s all he needed to hear,

All he needed to hear to press his lips against mine again,

The fireworks and the rest of the world fading away, us and our newfound love being the only things left in that unforgettable moment.

His tongue exploring my mouth,

His hands on my waist, his thumbs drawing small circles on my sides,

“Fuck, I’m so weak when it comes to you”, He whispered against my mouth.

Butterflies dancing in my stomach, my vision going fuzzy, my heart beating like crazy, our lips dancing together.

He broke the kiss after about a minute and pulled his phone out with shaky hands, calling the staff member that brought us here, telling him to come pick us up.

He then hung up, concentrating on me again, as if I was the only thing that mattered in that moment.

He stood up and grabbed my hand, dragging me back near the street.

“Sorry, but I really wanna spend more time with you” He said, getting close to me again, his arms wrapping around me again, pulling me flush against him, holding me close, the warmth radiating off him seeping into my skin.

As soon as the (poor) staff member arrived, we hurried in his car. The rest of the car drive was silent except for when our ‘driver’ asked us how it all went, and Sunghoon answered with a confident, steady voice. As if his hand wasn’t caressing my thigh all the time. As if he wasn’t turning to leave a kiss on my neck every couple minutes, as if he wasn’t making me crazy.

As soon as the staff dropped us in front of our building, we rushed inside, running up the stairs and into my dorm.

I had just enough time to lock the door behind us that he was already pinning me to the wall, his lips on mine again, my hands on his chest, feeling his heartbeat.

Feeling the heart that wasn’t beating just for him anymore, but for me too.

Our lips danced together, his hands traveled from my hips to my waist and back, going upwards ‘till my neck and cheeks.

His lips trailed down my jawline and neck, leaving a trail of goosebumps and passion behind them.

His hands moved back to my waist as he broke the kiss to look deep into my eyes.

“I love you, Y/N, so much” He whispered, burying his face in the crook of my neck.

“All of you, your eyes, your nose, your lips, your cheeks, your jawline, your neck, your collarbones, your shoulders, your arms, your hands, your chest, your tummy, your hips, your waist, even your fucking legs and thighs, your hair, your scent, your voice, the way you look at me, how much effort and care you put into everything you do, the way you always care about everyone and everything, the way you make sure that everyone feels loved and cherished, the way your eyes crinkle at the corners when you smile, the way your cheeks flush whenever you’re shy, the way you always listen to everyone’s problems and give them advice, the way you jump happily whenever someone brings you sweets or just any type of food. And the list goes on, I could go on for seconds, minutes, hours, days, months, years even. But the things I love most about you? Your heart and soul. Those are irreplaceable. They’re yours, and I love you.”

I felt tears roll down my cheeks at his words, and he kissed them away with so much care, love and adoration.

That night,

That night he proved me just how much he loved me,

Our bodies became one,

He was gentle, soft,

He made sure I felt good, he made sure I felt loved and cherished, he made sure that I felt adored.

He shared his heart and soul with me, we poured our hearts out to the other,

We let out all those unspoken feeling that were destroying us from the inside,

All those feelings that were sharp and hurtful when they were inside us, but turned out to be as beautiful as those fireworks,

Those fireworks that brought us together,

Those fireworks that I gifted him during his birthday,

Those fireworks that were just like love,

Uncontainable, exploding in millions of lights and sensations,

Those fireworks that were pretty, but never as pretty as him,

Those fireworks that became unforgettable,

Those fireworks that our hearts waited so much to see.

Those fireworks that now represent us,

Our love,

Our feelings,

All the passion we shared,

Our adoration, affection and care towards the other…

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 7

“ Those fireworks that now represent YOU.

That’s how me and your dad met.”

#kpop #fanfictions #enhypen #sunghoon #park sunghoon #fluff #no smut #suggestive #pregnancy #love #sunghoon x reader #enhypen fanfiction #park sunghoon x reader

46 notes · View notes

free-for-all-fics · 4 months ago

Text

Another prompt for The Silent Sea! Pls tag me if you’re inspired by this at all and I’d love to read it! 💙🌑

You were Han Yun-jae’s wife. You used to be a scientist of some sort but, following your marriage, you became pregnant with your daughter, Ha-jin. You lost contact with your former colleagues because your husband got in the way, but you didn’t blame him. When you found out you were going to have a child, you made a promise to your husband: No work that would put yourself or Ha-jin in danger - so no SAA, no more trips to other planets, and no Balhae Station. You quit your job and switched to a much safer field of work that kept you on Earth while focusing on being a mother and raising Ha-jin. As such, you and your husband decided to keep your past as an astrophysicist/virologist/chemist/astrobiologist/other form of scientist of your choosing a secret from Ha-jin. You did, however, continue your friendship with some of your former colleagues. One of them frequently visited you after the tragic death of her husband during a mission. This friend tried to convince you to come back multiple times, leading to Yun-jae losing trust in them. Despite your friend’s efforts to get you to come back, you stuck to your promise... Except when they made you break it. Which was...as often as they could. Though you distanced yourself as much as possible, you still sent them secret letters and offered your input or expertise when it was asked for.

Letter 1:

Thank you for the letters, I am fine now. To be honest, I let the letters build up. I won't smooth that over with excuses. I know that it's not your fault everything went south, but I don't think it's likely I’ll be returning. I'm sorry that's where I've landed, but you know why. I'll still look for your letters in the mail, and you can look for mine in the post. If you leave the life, l've got a room for you here. I know you won't. I regret bringing you in - more than anything. Yun-jae’s fine. Still spits fire at the mention of your name, which I'm sure will make you smile a bit. Ha-jin’s good like she always is. She’s picked up my habit of asking strangers the exact questions she shouldn't. It drives Yun-jae nuts...but it cracks me up.

Letter 2:

I do still have my notes - you'll find them at the safe house. You must know that curiosity is twisting my neurons into knots of pure agitation. That's FINE. I'll let that happen. You're a monster. So...all right, I have to know a little. No names, okay? Just tell me about the pattern. Was I right? Has it started up again?

Note 1:

All right...let me know a little. Just a date. Don't send anything else.

Note 2:

It's not the same date, but I know this handwriting. Is it RX?

Note 3:

I can’t come back in.

Note 4:

I am not coming back in!

Letter 3:

Not a word to Yun-jae or anyone in the SAA, but look, here's what's still weird for me: The pattern we spotted — why was it gone for so long? The night of the wavebreak - did we really hit too close to home on that one? If so, that accounts for the long silence. I mean, it's been years since we've caught anything. So did we scare them into silence for a minute there, or did we just lose the thread at that point? I'll help you for the time being, but you've got to get another analyst on board, okay? I've got enough of the notes in my head, but I need you to hit me with the specific dates and locations for all of the events. We subscribe to three papers - you can guess which ones. Drop everything into the want ads. I'm a sucker for the lonely hearts ads; give me a reason to read them.

Letter 4:

Cute ads. Sad though. I know you remember what we learned in school, and then again in training: That every joke travels with a bit of truth in its pocket. You’re clearly lonely. I realize I'm the last person on Earth who should give relationship advice, as I'm the benefactor of an obscene amount of what my mother called love luck. Yun-jae dropped into my life, and that's that. I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop squarely on my nose. Luck like this is unnerving. You know when I approached you with the job at the Korean-American Scientists and Engineers Association (KSEA)? I hope this doesn't cheapen our friendship in your eyes, but I made a project of you. You were so brutally competitive and - populate your own list of compliments, you know what I think of you. I set my mark on you, and you on me. We became close friends, graduated, parted ways. I kept reading your work - you were still so much better with words than I could hope to be.

Letter 5:

When your articles stopped appearing, I got very worried. I searched for your byline everywhere - found nothing. Then I found out why. My heart went out to you. Your husband would be furious with you right now, you know. He loved you, and the last thing he'd ever want is for you to sit the rest of your life out. I helped you back on your feet because I couldn't think of a better person to do the same for me when my time to fall flat on my face came around. By the way, you were hilariously suspicious at first. Can't say I blame you - losing your husband was a kick to the gut, and anyone who looked you in the eye could see you waiting for the next blow to land. You found your way back, got writing again, but that look you had then, you still have it today.

If true love means never having to say you're sorry, then true friendship between researchers means never having to break out the grease pencil. Fine, here it is one last time: He's dead, you're not. Go to his grave tomorrow, and say goodbye. He loved you, and if he had a voice to speak, it would beg you to stop torturing yourself.

Back to the numbers. I'm selling a bunch of used garden equipment in the papers of record. Tell me if you think I got it right.

Note 5:

I heard you loud and clear. Drive at your own chosen speed. But the numbers - how sure are you that I'm right?

Note 6:

All right. This situation is bad. stand by - the next letter is going to come to you via courier.

You kept your promise with relative ease until there was a really close call one night. As to what happened, your husband would rather not say. He took you and Ha-jin, and left. And he was right to. That time, you chose your daughter over Balhae Station and Director Choi. And you were right to. But it didn’t end there. That incident, whatever it was, caused your daughter’s legs to become damaged and she had to be hospitalized. Five years ago, when Ha-jin was about seven years old, due to your expertise in whatever scientific and/or medical field of your choosing, you were asked to be a part of the team of 117 researchers and scientists to go on the mission to Balhae Lunar Research Station on the moon. Following your daughter’s hospitalization, your friend finally convinced you to help them on the Balhae Operation. But to do this, they lied to you about many things and quite possibly used your husband and daughter to emotionally manipulate you. But, in their mind, it was for the greater good.

Earth was, and still is, undergoing a water crisis. A Class 1 Societal Disruption to be exact, brought on by a severe worldwide water shortage. Rivers, lakes, and even parts of the oceans have dried up, fish are considered extinct, water is strictly and tightly rationed, keeping pets is illegal, riots are common, and there's a general sense of dejection and acceptance of mankind's eventual extinction. The mission to Balhae Station was supposed to fix this, and it might’ve well succeeded in doing so if done right. If done wrong, however, Earth was looking at a Class 2 Societal Collapse at best, or up to Class 4 Multispecies Extinction at worst, depending on how many species are susceptible to lunar water. Though it broke your heart to make such a difficult decision, you were going to keep your mission a secret from your family and leave quietly without saying anything. Once you safely arrived at Balhae Station, you were going to record and send a video message to Yun-jae to explain to him the situation and why you left. Though you knew he’d be angry, you hoped he’d understand in time. You hoped that you’d return home safely to a better world once your mission was completed successfully. That was your plan.

But he somehow found out about the mission and your agreement to go, though he didn’t know all of the details. It resulted in a heated argument that your daughter overheard when she was allowed to be temporarily discharged from the hospital to visit home for a weekend. You and your husband knew how homesick she got, no matter how often you visited her in the hospital and brought her things from home that she asked for. Her favorite was a large nightlight that made the entire room glow a soft blue like the sea or the moon and emit soothing sounds designed for sleep. You gave it to Ha-jin so she wouldn’t have nightmares. You told her,

“We all come from water, so dying isn’t really dying, it’s more like taking a break.”

Your words plus the nightlight helped her sleep.

The doctors told you that Ha-jin could go home for short stays once in a while. It wasn’t that she was better, it was just that it helped ease her homesickness. You and Yun-jae feared it someday would be her last chance. Even so, she was glad to be coming home. She missed her parents terribly. And you missed her too.

“Han residence, Mrs. Han speaking. You know this line isn’t secure. Stop - I’ll call you.” Ha-jin heard your voice as she eavesdropped and watched you from the second floor. You hung up the phone in the living room and walked to your office, shutting the door firmly behind you. She had no idea who you were talking to or what the conversation was about.

“Can I have my notes?” You asked your husband. You couldn’t find them in any of the usual places where you kept them safely locked away, which told you that your husband either moved or took them.

“No.”

“They might be helpful.”

“I bet they would be extremely helpful, but no, you really can't. They're gone.”

“Gone where?”

“I shredded them.”

“You what?!”

“Remember when Ha-jin picked the lock on that filing cabinet?”

“Which one?”

“I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that, to my knowledge it was just the one.”

“I mean...which one? The only one ever? That one?”

“I knew she was looking for your notes, so I shredded everything.”

“So it’s all lost.”

“It’s all lost.”

“How could you do that?”

“I thought it might prevent her from someday finding out what you used to do and what you're doing right now. She’s too young and doesn’t understand now, but she won’t be seven years old forever. I don’t want her following in your footsteps when she’s older. I mean, do you even have any idea how selfish you’re being right now?” Ha-jin heard her dad raise his voice at you from downstairs while she was drawing in her room. Though she was only seven years old, she could tell that everything was not okay. That something was going on and it was bad. She snuck out of her room and, hiding behind the railing of the second floor and peeking through the wooden bars next to the stairs, she crouched out of sight as she listened to you and Yun-jae, her parents, argue below her.

“No! You’re not doing this!” He yelled, unable to keep his composure.

“Keep it down!” You hissed under your breath.

“You made me a promise!”

“This is more important.”

“What do you want me to tell Ha-jin, huh? That her mom doesn’t care enough about her to stay?”

“Yun-jae!” You snapped at him, too irritated to call him honey like you normally did. “I’m not suddenly an entirely new person just because I’m your wife and the mother of your child.”

“You don’t understand! We knew the risks of our jobs when we married, but things changed when you became pregnant! We knew that because of our work, Ha-jin may lose us if we both stayed. We agreed that we didn’t want our daughter to be orphaned because of our work, so at least one of us should leave the field and find a safer option! I didn’t force you to leave, you chose to do it!”

“You’re right. I chose to leave. And I don’t regret my decision for a second. I loved that job, but I’m not blaming you for my resignation, Yun-jae. That’s not why I’m doing this.”

“So then why are you leaving?! You promised you wouldn’t do this again!”

“I told you. This mission is more important than keeping the promise I made to you. I can’t tell you more than that.”

“Can’t or won’t?”

“Can’t. I really can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t?”

“Per the terms of the contract, I can’t disclose any more information about this mission to anyone, not even you - my husband.”

“What? Did you sign an NDA already without consulting me first?”

“I didn’t feel the need to consult you on this because this mission isn’t unlike anything I’ve done before. It’s like you said, I know the risks of what I’m getting into. I can handle myself.”

“But you’ll be gone for years! A lot can happen in that time! Don’t you walk away from me! Just leave then, fly off to the moon!” He yelled after you in frustration as you waved him off and walked away from him, not wanting to continue the conversation if he was going to be like that.

“Oh, grow up, Yun-jae,” you scoffed at him, just as frustrated and exasperated as he was.

You and your husband both needed time and space away from each other to cool off.

“Are you really going to go?” Ha-jin asked you, standing in the doorway of what you called your “artist’s studio”.

Ever since you and Yun-jae bought the house together and moved in, it quickly became the one room in the entire house that was entirely yours. You drew and painted a lot even while pregnant and, once Ha-jin was old enough to pick up a crayon, you shared your special space with her. It was almost like your sanctuary in a way. A room where you could escape reality and let your imagination run free for a few minutes or hours. Many of your paintings and drawings decorated the walls, along with some of Ha-jin’s art. There were art supplies scattered about in what looked like a chaotic mess but, to you, it was an organized mess.

You were sat down in front of a canvas or large sketchbook propped up on an easel, paintbrush or charcoal pencil in hand as you were in the middle of drawing or painting something new. “Have a seat.” You patted the cushioned chair next to you where she usually practiced drawing with you.

She stubbornly stayed rooted where she was and crossed her arms. “No. Dad told me you’re leaving. Why?”

“Ha-jin, it’s not like that,” you sighed.

“Are you coming back?”

“I know you heard some stuff between me and your dad, but you’ve got the wrong idea, kiddo.”

“Then what’s the right idea?”

“You’ll understand when you’re older.”

“Why is that always all you say?”

“Trust me, if I could tell you everything, I would. But for now, I just can’t. Now come and sit.”

“I’m sorry, I just can’t.” She parroted your words back at you.

You chuckled. “Like mother, like daughter I see. Well, too bad. You’re doing it.” You gently grabbed her hand and sat her down next to you, wrapping your arm around her in something of a side hug so she couldn’t get up as you drew pictures together.

“Why are you leaving?”

“You have no idea how much I want to tell you why, but I honestly can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Just know this - if you knew, you would understand.”

“Are you coming back?”

“I really don’t know.”

“That’s not a fair thing to say!”

“Trust me, kiddo, I know.”

Just as you finished suiting up minus your helmet, your phone rang. It was your husband.

“You're going to Balhae Station!” was the first thing he said to you in an accusatory tone when you picked up.

“How did you know?”

“Never mind how I know! That's not the point. You're deflecting.”

“Guilty.”

“You don't have my permission to be in space or go to the moon. Come home, right now.”

“Your permission? I think l'm a little too old for that.”

“What you're too old for is running headfirst into a dangerous situation and leaving the rest of us to clean up after you.”

“What is with you right now? This isn’t my first assignment. I know the risks that come with space travel and am fully trained for this. Calm down.”

“Honey. You don't get it. I am not angry at you.”

“Could’ve fooled me.”

“I'm scared. Please just come home.”

“Shouldn’t you want me to fight for a better future?”

“No. I want people with political power, around the clock protection, and endless resources at their fingertips to fight this. Not my wife. Not yet at least. Live a little longer before making that sort of decision. Although as your husband, I can't commend your career in the library sciences strongly enough.”

“You want me to be a librarian for the rest of my life?”

“Maybe. They're the world's unsung heroes and they don’t go to space for years long missions. Please just come home.”

“You keep telling me to turn back and come home, but I can't do that. Not just yet.”

“But you and I are married! We have a daughter together! How can you just leave us here? I won’t have it!”

“Earth is cursed. If I remain here and do nothing, when I could go to Balhae Station and do something, then all those dear to me will die and it’ll feel like it’s partially my fault.”

“Are Ha-jin and I not dear to you? Stay with us, and you and I will save Earth together.”

“I’m sorry, Yun-jae. But there are others who are counting on me even more than you.”

“You still don't get it. This isn't dangerous to just you. You’re impacting your entire life. Me, our daughter, your friends…anyone who knows you.”

“I know and I’m sorry, but… I bought my ticket years ago. I can’t just back out now. I have to do this.”

His stomach dropped. He felt as if you weren’t just talking about a ticket for the shuttle but that you were alluding to your own death. It was as you said: You knew the risks.

You didn’t come home. Against your husband’s wishes, you went to Balhae Station, leaving him and your daughter on Earth. The accident caused the chips to go dead. The government couldn’t let the bereaved families know right away. A radiation leak. As far as he knew, that was what killed you and everyone else on board. He and Ha-jin both grieved in their own ways. He’d swipe through the photos of you he had saved on his phone or stare around your house, at the photos of you hanging on the walls - your wedding photo, the photos of you and Ha-jin from her birth to when she was growing up. Or he’d stand in your “artist’s studio” and stare at your artworks, especially the unfinished ones. He did not tell Ha-jin about the true circumstances surrounding your death. For many years, Ha-jin believed you died in a car accident while visiting a friend.

Five years later, your death still remains a painful subject for Ha-jin and Yun-jae, who were both aggravated by your leaving and fought with you before you left. They both regret that the last things they said to you before you left were words said in anger and fear instead of love.

“If you press this, I'll fly over to save you.”

“That means I can always come home thanks to you.”

“That’s right. Can I come with you? I want to see the moon too.”

“Once I get back, I'll never go away again. I promise.”

“Liar.”

That’s what you told her too, before you left. And you never came back.

“I’m not lying. Once I get back, I'm going to teach you how to swim.”

“Swim?”

“It's a way to move freely underwater, like fish.”

“But fish are all dead.” After a long pause, Ha-jin spoke up again. “Why don't we ever talk about Mom?”

“I didn’t want to upset you.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“That's why I never talked to you about her.”

“Oh. I don’t know where to start. You know, when I get back from my mission, when it's time...it's time. We’ll talk then.”

Captain Han stands in front of the memorial with Dr. Song. Unbeknownst to her, the memorial commemorates his wife’s death along with the 116 others, including her older sister.

“This memorial is to remember the 117 crew members who lost their lives five years ago at Balhae Station, a lunar station built by the Republic of Korea SAA. Through independent efforts, the SAA…” The recording of an automated female voice plays.

The Space and Aeronautics Administration offer Dr. Song to join a lunar sample retrieval mission to the deserted Balhae Lunar Research Station, which has been abandoned for five years after most of the crew was killed in a radiation leak. The SAA want to retrieve three "samples", but won’t tell the people on the mission what the samples are. Song Ji-an joins the mission to Balhae, mainly for a personal reason: Her sister Song Won-kyung was one of the crewmembers of Balhae Station who was killed five years ago. The team is led by Captain Han Yun-jae, who has his own personal reasons for going on the mission, and who knows a secret about what happened on Balhae. When he meets Dr. Song, she reminds him of you. Dr. Song is stubborn, headstrong, determined to find answers…just like you were. And, as far as he knows, those traits that he once admired you for, even if they frustrated him at times, got you killed.

“Balhae Station was temporarily closed for five years after the radiation leak. We decided to close it permanently. Your mission is to retrieve an important sample before the permanent closure of the station and return to Earth. Once you land on the moon, your allotted mission time will be 24 hours…”

“Captain Han. Are all your missions conducted like this? It makes no sense to restrict necessary information for the mission.”

“Are you always that passionate?”

“There’s less than 10% probability our whole crew will survive. If you’re worried about their safety, you should reduce the uncertainty as much as you can.”

“Uncertainty lies everywhere, be it outer space or Earth.”

“So I shouldn’t ask any questions and just do as I’m told? The outlook is quite bleak.”

“Aren’t scientists people who find a way in such situations? Are you sure you still want to come?”

“Now that you mentioned my work ethic, I can’t back out.”

“I will ask for your opinion when I deem it necessary.”

“Captain Han. There are too many oddities here. We must conduct an autopsy on that body to find the exact cause of his death.”

“Didn’t you hear what I said?”

“I did. The radiation level doesn’t look right, and the cause of his death is uncertain. We cannot just let this go.”

“I decide what our priority is.”

“It looks like the numbers are at a normal level. But in order to carry out our mission, we must make a full inspection of the station.”

“Our mission isn’t to investigate the cause of the accident at Balhae Station.”

“Traces of them trying to make an escape. It looks like the area was shut down in an emergency right after the accident.”

“I don’t see any burn scars on the dead bodies.”

“Right. They all have the characteristics of drowned bodies. What in the world happened here?”

“Captain Han, if we cannot conduct an autopsy now, why don’t we stop by the infirmary and check their medical records?”

“I thought we were done discussing this.”

“Since the situation has changed, I’m simply sharing my opinion again.”

“What has changed?”

“We found many more suspicious elements on more dead bodies. If we can collect some tissue from the crew, we might be able to find a lead.”

“Can you focus on the mission instead of your personal curiosity?”

“What do you mean by that?”

“You heard me.”

Though Captain Han may seem cold and narrow-minded to her at every turn, unbeknownst to Dr. Song, your death is why he is so against her asking questions or going off-mission to fulfill her own curiosity about her sister. He understands where she’s coming from. After finding the corridor with all of the bodies, a part of him wants to find your body amongst the dead and investigate what happened to you too, but he can’t lose focus or let his emotional attachments to you get in the way of the mission or jeopardize his crew’s safety. He’s a Captain first and a husband second.

“Why was the co-pilot in the storage alone? Why didn’t you report as you deviated?”

“Are you interrogating me?”

“Once communications are restored, I must report back on the reasons why I lost two crew members in under an hour. So I need to know exactly what happened.”

“I was just…looking around the area. It’s my fault for not reporting. I’m—”

“I don’t need an excuse. I’ll know once I check your bodycam.”

“I’d like to inspect the medical records and the other bodies.”

“And? What else do you need from me?”

“I just need your permission to conduct an investigation.”

“I thought you didn't need my permission. You've been doing whatever you like.”

“After everything that's happened, don't you get it by now? We can't get any answers if we don't ask questions.”

“It's gonna be tough. But we still have a mission to do. You have to remember that.”

The crew confront Han, who admits that he was told by Director Choi that the samples they are collecting is lunar water, though he is unaware of its effects. Lunar water was originally discovered by Song's sister, Song Wonkyong, and the SAA has been hiding its existence for fear that other parties might figure out how to make it safe for human consumption first and monopolize the substance.

“Is it water? The sample we’re here to retrieve. Is it water?”

Captain Han doesn’t answer but, from the look on his face, Dr. Song knows.

“You knew.”

“I’m sure you are aware of the space resource development that countries were competing over. Nobody was interested in the moon. Nothing in particular was found, so most countries had pulled out. However, there is a reason why we never gave up on the moon. We actually found something very profound.”

“What is it?”

“Water. It was a perfect chance for us to catch up to other developed countries as a newcomer in the industry. Dr. Song Wonkyung called it…lunar water.”

“Balhae Station was a place where they studied the lunar water.”

“Is there really water on the moon?”

“That’s everything Director Choi told me. She said we found water on the moon, and if this research is a success, we could save all of humanity.”

“Why did you hide this from us? Why did you go so far to keep this a secret from us?”

“It’s obvious what would happen if this information is leaked. Lee Gisu is dead, but someone is bound to come after us.”

“No. The real reason Director Choi didn’t tell us about the sample is because that water is what killed everyone at Balhae Station as well as Soochan.”

“What do you mean?”

“I think we know why Soochan died. It looks like Soochan was exposed to the lunar water. We aren’t completely sure, but the lunar water seems to act like a virus. It multiplies until it takes the host’s life.”

“It multiplies? The water multiplies?”

“Yes. It multiplies endlessly. I’m sure it seemed like an amazing resource. If we could control its multiplication, if we could commercialize it, they probably thought it could save mankind.”

“If that’s possible, it should happen.”

“That’s what my sister wanted.”

“Dr. Song Wonkyung.”

“Yes, Dr. Song Wonkyung. My sister wanted that too.”

Did you want the same? Is the promise of lunar water the real reason you left? Captain Han doesn’t like the feelings that come over him when he realizes the answer to those questions are most likely yes. If it was possible to feel any worse or guiltier about how he spoke to you in your last days on Earth, he would be. But feeling sorry for himself won’t change the past nor do him or his crew any good.

He has no other choice but to finally come clean. “I was told it’s still under research, so the substance is very unstable. It’s susceptible to external stimulus, so it has to be kept at a low temperature.”

“That external stimulus is coming in contact with a living organism. The researchers here were infected by the lunar water and died, but the government covered up everything to hide the existence of lunar water. We don’t know the symptoms or how you get infected. There are too many things we don’t know.”

“I know as much as you do. I don't understand anything about this lunar water either.”

“I bet.”

“It wasn’t officially given a name back then, but the lunar water, as we now know it to be called, had my wife obsessed for a very long time. She couldn't figure it out either. She was sure it was part of some long term plan.”

“Plan for what?”

“That's where she stopped. She never had enough information to put things together. I thought, what Information could my wife have that's so important? I know I shouldn't be telling you this—”

“But you're going to?”

“My wife somehow was on the verge of a scientific breakthrough before she came here. Her plan before she left, at least from what I could figure out from her notes, was to find some of this lunar water and genetically alter it to make it safe for human contact and consumption as part of a Water Restoration Project on Earth. I don’t know if she was able to do that before she died, but that's all I've been able to figure out from the notes and formulas she wrote.”

“Do you know what the correct formula is?”

He hesitates in answering the question.

“I’m not angry at you or blaming you. I just want information.”

He shakes his head. “Her notes were incomplete. Like the rest was kept locked away safely in her memory and died with her. From what she put down on paper, I assume she was talking about the chemical formula that she hoped was going to be used in the Water Restoration Project. I didn’t entirely understand it, to be perfectly honest. But the thing that really got my wife interested was the fact that it wasn't supposed to be a deadly virus. Which was great, but the why kept nagging at her. She was afraid that the mission from five years ago was a test run for something that could potentially be done on a global scale.”

“Why?”

He almost shudders just thinking about it. “I don’t want to know. You see, it's things like this that make me want to keep you away from your questions. I was against it. I found out you were Dr. Song’s sister and was reluctant to have you on my team. You remind me of her. My wife. What you’re doing now… That's pretty much what she did. She'd head out, tackle some strange mystery that had gotten her attention, and then she'd come back with the answers. What about you? Why did you come here?”

Why was Dr. Song brought to Balhae Station? Is it for the same reason as he?

“My sister called me here.”

“What do you mean?”

He already knows what she means. He just wants to hear what she has to say. He knows why Dr. Song was brought here, because it’s the same reason he was brought here. They thought he might be the key to the secrets you, his wife, left behind. He told them that he wasn’t, but they told him that he could be. You would never give him information that would put him or Ha-jin in danger. But he knows from experience that the more you love someone, the more you show your secrets, whether you mean to or not. That's why the family of an astronaut or scientist is never safe. As he was fond of pointing out to you.

“Captain Han, your wife’s death wasn't an accident.”

“I know. When people came looking for her things, they always wanted to focus on what she was working on last. There was this very persistent woman who wanted everything she worked on, all of her notes. That's what the message that led me here said.”

“And Director Choi gave you that message.”

“Yes.”

“Recently?”

“Yes. I should have just handed them over instead of destroying them. Maybe my wife wouldn't have been drawn into all this. Maybe she wouldn’t have died.”

“Captain Han. I know your wife’s death wasn't an accident. You know it wasn't an accident. The only other people who know...are the people who killed her. That's who sent you the message. You said Director Choi gave you the code to restricted areas. The data storage of Balhae Station is inside the main lab. And I need level one access to get in there.”

“Three died, and one of them was a spy? It’s the worst report I can imagine.”

“You’re the one who approved the co-pilot to be changed right before we departed.”

“Once the Inspection Department hears of this, they’ll conduct a thorough investigation on the reasons for the replacement. Of course, it’ll include me. Is there a possibility that other members could be in league with him?”

“It cannot be excluded.”

“What’s important is catching the intruder who took that sample.”

“Is it more important to stop the intruder than to retrieve the samples?”

“You of all people should know how valuable those samples are.”

Though it goes unspoken, Captain Han knows Director Choi is referring to you and your death. He knows what she’s implying without saying anything. Don’t let her sacrifice five years ago be in vain. If you give up now, her death will have been for nothing. Is that what you want? He lowers his head, staring at the table as he sighs.

“I wouldn’t have started this if I’d let anyone else have it.”

“We need access to level one areas to conduct a thorough search.”

Their exploration of the main database area is cut short when they hear screams and gunfire as the intruder attacks. E1 is clutching the profusely bleeding stump where his hand used to be. With their guns pointed, the crew see the silhouette of not just one intruder, but two. One looks to be a child while the other looks to be an adult woman. The child holds a canister of lunar water and E1’s disembodied hand before dropping the latter. When Kim Sun shoots at her, she drops the canister, causing the light to go red. Both the child and the woman retreat into the underbrush. But before they do, Captain Han feels the woman’s eyes on him, as if her gaze is burning a hole in his very being. When they see movement, they shoot at both the woman and child, but none of their shots hit. The intruders are too fast. Captain Han catches a glimpse of the little girl’s face. Her eyes flicker like that of a reptile with a nictitating membrane. Both she and the woman retreat into the vents and the crew have to evacuate when the lunar water from the broken canister comes in contact with E1’s blood.

“She ripped off his arm. Then they both crawled all over the ceiling. What is this… First, some water killed people, and then a couple of monsters show up too.”

“Could either of them be the one who killed Lee Gi-su?”

“Yes. I think so.“

“Why are they following us around? To kill us all?”

“I think it’s because of the lunar water. I think that’s why they killed Gi-su, and attacked us. Whenever we find lunar water, they show up. Perhaps they’re after it as well.”

“Do you think...it's really possible that they’re survivors?”

“Survivors? But how can they be survivors? I don't think a kid and a woman could survive five years here on their own. It was a kid and a woman, right? Weren’t they?”

“She was a kid. And the other one was an adult woman. We all saw. She was behaving like a child. A child who wanted to keep what's hers. Who didn't want it taken away. I know it sounds odd, but...a child behaves like that. Maybe the child killed Gi-su or maybe the woman did. Maybe they killed him together. Whatever the case, what we just witnessed makes me think that the woman is protecting the child - like a mother protecting her young.”

“Are you saying, from their perspective, we’re the intruders?”

“Just like with Gi-su, they may be using only ventilation shafts to get around. Their attacks have come from the ventilation shaft.”

“You can get pretty much anywhere on board by using this main shaft INP-07.”

“Did you find the intruder?”

“There’s more than one. We’ve discovered two intruders.”

“Two intruders?”

“Yes. And the intruders’ whereabouts are still unknown.”

“What about the samples?”

He sets the intact lunar water canister on the table for Director Choi to see. “We may lose more lives at this rate. Do we have to continue?”

“As I mentioned before, this operation will be a failure if anybody else gets the lunar water. I don’t care if you kill the intruders. You must catch them. Also, make sure you retrieve the lunar water that was taken.”

“It was a kid and a woman.”

“What?”

“The intruders seemed like a little kid and a young woman. They were both wearing lab coats too.”

“So what?”

“Is there a possibility that this woman and this kid are survivors?”

Director Choi laughs. “Stop trying to make things more complicated than they should be. That’s not what’s important. Why does the woman’s or kid’s identity matter? That won’t change your mission. I dream of standing in the rain. When I wake up from that wonderful dream, it's painful beyond words to wake up to this horrendous and sad reality. I want to make sure it rains, once again, over this land, so that water may flow abundantly on Earth. We must recreate that world again.”

Though he hates to admit it to himself, Captain Han can’t disagree. You had the same dream ever since Ha-jin was born.

“Why are you being so difficult? Is it because of Director Choi? Why can’t I go back into the data storage?”

“It’s too dangerous to go back. We don’t know what happened to the lunar water after it leaked.”

“I finally found it. I can’t give up like this.”

“It’s dangerous, and that’s it. I can’t condone more deaths.”

“There were 117 crew members here at Balhae Station. None of them survived. If we take the lunar water back now, we may end up sacrificing more.”

“Dr. Song, if I help you... I'm only pushing you right to your sister who has lured you here.”

“I can handle myself.”

“My wife said the same thing to me before she died. It doesn’t matter what you find out. The lunar water will be taken back with that kid and that woman.”

“Then that’s all the more reason to get the data in the data storage. Now that we know the danger that lies in the lunar water, we need to investigate as much as we can. I don’t care if you don’t trust me. I’m not doing this for personal reasons only.“

“I know you’ll go even if I say no.” He knows that from being married to you for so many years. Dr. Song has the same look in her eyes as you did whenever you had your mind set on something. You were stubborn and, once he saw that look, he knew he couldn’t change your mind. “Go with Doc Hong. You can’t go alone. If you find anything on the lunar water, that woman, or that child, report back right away.”

While Kim Sun and Officer Gong are investigating the ventilation shafts, they encounter more drawings on the walls.

“Oh, shit! Those creepy drawings again. They keep showing up everywhere. This kid must like to draw. They’re a real artist.”

Captain Han is investigating different ventilation shafts. With his flashlight and gun pointed forward, he’s disconcerted when he sees drawings that don’t look like those of a child. They look too polished, too professional, too perfect. Along the corridors, he sees works of art that are eerily similar to the artwork that’s hanging up on the walls back home. Artwork created by your hand. When he reaches out to touch some of them, his fingers come back wet or smudged. Most of these drawings are old, but some are fresh. But that’s impossible. You’re dead….aren’t you? He doesn’t have time to dwell on those thoughts when voices of his crew come through his earpiece, informing him of their status.

“Captain. We've reached the shaft entrance on our end. The cover is still intact. I don't think she escaped through here.”

“Captain, we found a new passage from the hallway. This area of the station is not on the blueprint either. But it looks like...this passage runs all the way to the dorms. We should expand our search and check out the dorms as well.”

“Okay. Be careful.”

“This is very odd. From the blueprint, this passageway should lead us straight to the dorms.”

“I know. But it seems more like we've just been circling the same area.”

“Exactly.”

“It's like a game of hide-and-seek for them. They know exactly where we are and always manage to avoid us.”

“They know their way around here much better than we do.”

“Did we miss a passage on the holographic map?”

“I’m sorry. I’ll check once again when we get to the command center.”

“But why is this girl and this woman... These monsters... Whatever you want to call them. Why do we have to find them? We have the sample. We should just go home.”

In the medical bay, Dr. Hong, Dr. Song, and Lieutenant Ryu are caught by surprise when the little girl and woman stand by the glass doors, just watching. They’re both covered in blood, though the little girl is considerably more bloodied than the woman. She must’ve done most of the killing.

“Captain. Captain! The girl and the woman, they’re here.”

“You have eyes on them? Dr. Hong, respond.”

“Captain Han.”

“No, stop!”

When the woman and little girl try to enter the medical bay, Lieutenant Ryu shoots at them. But he’s no match for their superhuman speed as they sprint all over the walls. The child tackles Ryu and the woman crouches above her on the table, shielding her with her body like a mother protecting her child as they both stare unblinkingly at Dr. Song. She’s holding the canister of lunar water and the unknown child and woman both have a look in their eyes like they want it. Captain Han, Officer Gong, and Kim Sun enter from behind, their guns drawn and pointed at the intruders. Their backs are to them. Captain Han can’t see their faces as he keeps his gun pointed at them. He tries to get a closer look.

“Dr. Song, step away.”

“Wait a second. Don't come any closer. Give me a second.”

Captain Han signals for Kim Sun and Officer Gong to hold their fire. After a few seconds of tense silence that stretch on for what feels like an eternity as everyone is frozen in a confrontation between themselves, the girl, and the woman, the girl lunges for the capsule of lunar water. With it in hand, she and the woman both turn around, only to be shot at by Lieutenant Ryu. The woman, the child, and the lunar water canister are all hit in the process.

When Captain Han finally sees the woman’s face clearly, words like shocked, confused, heartbroken, relieved, skeptical, and conflicted cannot even begin to describe the plethora of emotions he’s feeling all at once when he sees you. His wife. Your hair is longer than it was and you’re covered in blood, but it’s definitely you. Your face that he stared at in photos is the same. Your voice that he listened to on repeat in old videos is the same as you softly speak his name when you see him for the first time.

“Yun-jae…”

You look at him, your eyes filled not just with tears, but longing and remorse. You recognize him. And when he glances down at your hand, you’re wearing your wedding ring. When you notice where his eyes glance to, you toy with the ring as your eyes lock on his own hand, his wedding ring glinting under the fluorescent lights as he keeps his gun pointed at you. While his crew look on in confusion, their eyes flickering between you and their captain, Yun-jae’s hand holding his gun begins shaking as he stares wide-eyed at you, his mind filled with so many questions that he wants to ask you, but can’t in that moment. And when he realizes the lunar water sample capsule had been compromised during the shootout and splashed over you, landing on your skin, he instinctively wants to rush forward to save you. He thinks you’re going to die a horrible death of drowning internally, but instead you and the child thrash and contort on the table, breathing heavily as your wounds close. Your eyes search for Yun-jae’s and, when you find him, you don’t break eye contact. When the child falls off the table, you follow her, once again shielding her with your body. Instead of resulting in a fatal reaction, the lunar water heals her and your wounds and allows you both to escape. Giving one last apologetic look to Yun-jae, you and the child run and retreat back into the vents while Officer Gong shoots at you. Captain Han doesn’t know what to make of the scene he just witnessed. What the fuck happened to you? You have superhuman speed. Your wounds close instantly after getting shot. The lunar water has no negative effect on you. But you recognized him. You said his name. You can speak, which means you can answer his questions. He has to find you. But first, he has to be a Captain.

“What were you thinking?”

“What?”

“Did you think they wouldn’t attack us if you gave them the lunar water? That doing so would solve everything?”

“I didn’t. I only wanted to show them that I wasn’t going to hurt them. That I’m not trying to take the capsule from them. I thought they’d feel that too, that they would understand.”

“If you do things like that and expose yourself to danger, then you bring the whole team down with you.”

“But you saw them. You saw how their bodies reacted to the lunar water. We all witnessed it.”

“The child’s cheek was cut open, and then it just closed. And her wounds healed instantly. It was the same with the woman.”

“So how can you explain that, Dr. Song?”

“How can you explain that the woman knew your name?” She answers his question with a question.

“That’s right. Captain, she knew your name. And she looked at you as if she knew you. Who is she? Do you know her?” Dr. Hong asks.

“That woman…she…at least, I think she’s…my wife.” Captain Han admits reluctantly, still uncertain of many things. As he says it, he toys with his own wedding ring on his finger, spinning it with his thumb as he’s deep in thought. No matter how many years passed, he couldn’t bear to take it off. Taking it off felt like making your death final. After news hit him that you died, he swore to never remarry or even date again. You’d always be his wife. His one and only. Until his own death. He loved you, still loves you, and you can never be replaced by another woman.

Nearly everyone exclaims different questions in unison. Questions like, “Your wife? You have a wife?” and “Your wife was part of the crew sent on the Balhae mission five years ago?” Clearly, they weren’t made aware of this information and why would they have been? His marital status didn’t seem relevant to the mission. Until now.

“Yes. I thought she died here five years ago but it’s her. I know it is. But that means…my wife couldn’t have died five years ago. Could she really be here?” As Captain Han speaks, he begins to doubt himself. “Or maybe it’s not her, just something with her face and her memories. Or maybe there really is a radiation leak and I’m hallucinating.”

“You’re not hallucinating, Captain. We’ve established there’s no radiation leak and we all saw her.”

“But she…she was just a normal human woman when I knew her. She couldn’t move like that or heal like that. I don’t know how she…” He shakes his head, unable to continue his train of thought. “Dr. Song, do you have any idea what kind of being that child is? What happened to my wife to make her able to do those things?”

Song theorizes that you and the girl have a condition or immunity that makes you compatible with lunar water, and that you may be the key to making lunar water safe for consumption back on Earth.

“No, I don't. But what I do know is...their bodies can definitely handle lunar water. It won’t kill them.”

“So, what was that girl and that woman - I’m sorry, Captain. Your wife, I mean - Did the lunar water change them somehow?”

“Well, it seemed like their bodies totally adapted.”

“Adapted?”

“They didn't just adapt to it. Their physical abilities, and speed of recovery showed way more than that.”

“The child may have been born with antibodies for it, or it may be a special case of genetic mutation caused by different environmental factors.”

“Whether or not that woman is your wife, Captain, what we do know is that they’re a danger to us. We should resume the search and catch them, even if that means killing them...”

“No, we can't kill them,” Dr. Song protests.

“We need to kill them and do whatever it takes to put an end to this, so we can go home.”

“We can't do that. They may be the only key to the secret of the lunar water. They might just be the thing we need right now.”

“We'll bait them and capture them. Show me the map of the ventilation shafts, please. INP-07. INP-07 leads to many places. If we lure them with this lunar water capsule and block off this intersection here... The one I've just showed you… They’ll have to come out of the vent in the hallway of the machine room. Then we'll shut both ends of the hallway.”

“Like a dog hunt. So what we wanna do is chase them down and trap them. But the problem is, a wild dog can be extremely vicious and easily rip a person to pieces. And there’s two of them.”

“That is true. Even if we get lucky enough and manage to trap them in the hallway, it's still going to be too dangerous to subdue them and catch them alive.”

“So that's why we need Dr. Song.”

“Hey, Captain. We shouldn't use guns. It's important that we don't provoke them until you and I calm them down.”

“That's my decision to make. One of them is my wife and I won’t let the child hurt her or you. Even within the SAA, some people were against moving the lunar water to Earth.”

“If we carry something back without confirming its safety, it could pose a danger for everyone.”

“But Director Choi or other higher-ups probably thought it’s more important not to let anyone else get their hands on the lunar water.”

“Knowing everyone in this station was killed by that very lunar water?”

“There are enough reasons to take this risk. I don’t care about the child as much as my wife. I have questions, and she might have the answers.”

“I think…my sister and possibly your wife deleted all the research data. Perhaps they hoped no one would find out about the lunar water.”

“Then why do you think they left us those messages? In the end, they both probably thought someone had to do this. Wouldn’t that be why they called us here?”

“I’m not sure. Once I find out the entire truth, what am I really supposed to do? I have no idea.”

He feels the same way.

The crew set a trap for you and the girl. You and she are lured as planned. When Captain Han presses the button to shut the gate, neither of you are fast enough to slide under the door and make it before it shuts completely. When you try to pull her with you, the child’s leg gets trapped while your long hair gets caught under the door and, when you try to pull it free, it only causes you immense pain as you nearly rip your hair from your scalp. You both try to free yourselves, but it only makes it worse as you only hurt yourselves more and more as you struggle. You look up at Yun-jae, your eyes scared and filled with tears as you call his name repeatedly and plead for his help. He approaches you slowly, his gun pointed at the child but not you.

Dr. Song, who was acting as bait alongside Captain Han, comes to your and the child’s side to help. “No, wait. No, wait. Stop moving. You'll get hurt.”

When Yun-jae kneels down to your level and tries to free your hair, it hurts so much that you instinctively bite his neck. Hard. Hard enough to draw blood and make him drop his gun. It’s the only space you can reach that isn’t protected by his space suit. At the same time, the child bites Dr. Song’s hand. That’s when she notices the name and number tattooed on the child’s neck.

“Luna? Luna 073?”

You and Luna both cry as you struggle. With no other choice, Yun-jae pushes you away and grabs his gun, quickly shooting both you and Luna with tranquilizer darts.

“This is the best that we can do for them.”

Dr. Song opens the gate, freeing you both. While she checks on Luna, Yun-jae checks on you, holding you in his arms as you grip onto him until you fall asleep.

“I'll get them ready to be transported,” Officer Gong says, ready to handcuff you both.

Captain Han stops him. “They need treatment first.”

While Dr. Song carries Luna, Yun-jae lifts you bridal style into his arms.

“Are we handing them over to backup as soon as they get here? They will take them to Earth, won't they? Do you know what will happen to them when they get there, and where they’ll go?”

He looks at your face as you sleep. You’ll return home with him, he thinks. The lights turn red as the gate closure commences, and you immediately wake up and push him away from you, rolling out of his arms. You and Luna run and retreat into the vents. Before he can follow after Dr. Song, the gate closes on him. He hits it in frustration. No. He can’t lose you. Not again. He crawls through vent AP-4 to get to where Dr. Song is at the second intersection. Wherever she and Luna are, you’re bound to be also.

You and Luna split up. While Luna leads Dr. Song through the vents to her sister’s old room, you lead Yun-jae through the vents to your old room.

“Where did you go? Were you...waiting for me?”

He finds you sitting on your messy bed in your room. You’re crying, your head in your hands. He approaches, lightly touching your shoulder.

“Are you okay? Is your head hurt? I’m so sorry. I don’t know how this happened. I’m gonna have a word with Dr. Hong and we can get you checked out…”

You sniffle and wipe your tears before you look up at him. “It hurts, but not terribly. My wounds will heal. Though they’d heal faster with lunar water. I’ll be fine, Yun-jae. Physically, at least. It’s not my head that’s hurting the most, honey. It’s my heart. It’s just…the reality of all this is hitting me for the first time,” you sob.

“I know, it’s crazy. But I’m right here with you. We’re together again.”

You stare at him for a few seconds, just taking him in. He does the same with you. Finally, you speak again. “I didn’t think you’d come. I thought you had gotten my last message but…if you’re here now, then that means you didn’t,” you say with a heavy sigh.

“Message? What message?”

You pat the bed for him to sit next to you. When he does so, you open a laptop and click on a video file. You show him the screen and let it play. The video starts out normally, with you in your room. You’re sitting by the large window that looks out to space, Earth visible in the distance. You’re beaming, a big smile on your face.

“Hey, baby! I just wanted to send you and Ha-jin a quick ‘hello’ and ‘I love you’. I'm far away now. In a quiet, beautiful place. Please forgive me for not saying goodbye properly before I left. Be well, Yun-jae. And tell Ha-jin not to be too hard on her nurses.”

The video cuts and skips forward.

“Hi, honey! Good news! I'm gonna be coming home soon! Yay! I cannot wait to be done with this job—And come home to my loving husband and wonderful daughter. I miss you both so much. I gotta get back to work. I love you, Yun-jae. I miss you so much. I'm sending tons of kisses. Bye, baby!” You blow a kiss.

He remembers receiving those messages. He still has them saved on his phone. He’s played them over and over for himself and for Ha-jin, both before and after your death.

The video then cuts forward and shows you again, but you’re different this time. Your hair is longer and messy as if it hasn’t been brushed in days. And your eyes are filled with tears. You look scared. The lights are red and there’s an alarm going off and screaming in the background.

“Yun-jae... You were right. I did lie to you. I shouldn't have, but— All I can say is that if you get this... Stay away.”

You drop the camera in your haste to get away. The last thing he hears on the recording are the sounds of screaming and gunfire coming from a closed off corridor. The very corridor where he found all those bodies. The last thing he sees is you crawling into a vent to safety. The video abruptly ends.

“I tried to press the send button so you’d get that final message, but I realize now that I must not have pressed it properly. My hands were shaking so bad, I could barely hold the camera.”

“I- I don’t- I don’t understand,” Yun-jae stammers. He’s never seen this video until now. “When everyone else died…did you escape? Have you...been living here all alone?”

You shake your head. “Not entirely alone. I’ve had Luna with me. She’s become like a daughter to me. I’ve taught her everything I could. How to read, how to write, how to draw, how to talk.”

“She hasn’t spoken a word since we encountered her.”

“Not to you, no. She’s shy. I know she’s killed members of your crew and I’m sorry for that, but… She’s scared. She doesn’t know any better. For the past five years, I’ve been the only one she can completely trust. Though she’s warming up to…Dr. Song, was it? She’ll warm up to you too. Just give her time. Give her a chance.”

“I was only allotted 24 hours for this mission. I don’t have a lot of time to give. I’m not here to talk about Luna. I want to talk about you. I thought you were dead. Ha-jin believes you’re dead. What the hell happened here five years ago? What the hell happened to you?”

His words make your crying start up anew. Your sobs turn almost violent as your whole body shakes. “Yun-jae…don’t ask me that. Please. Don’t do it. Don’t you ever ask me that. If you ask me, I’ll have to tell you. And I hate to think what would happen then.”

“I’m sorry, I know this is hard for you, but I’m asking. I need to know. Don’t you think I deserve to know?”

“Yes, of course you do, but… I can’t do this. Unless…” You lick your lips and sit up straighter as you face him. “If your marriage is still going to work, it needs to be built on trust, right?”

“Absolutely.”

“You have to understand, she’s not sorry that she lied. I'm sorry that I have to be the one to tell you the truth. It was hard for her to be one hundred percent honest with anyone, so it’s hard for me too.”

“I know that.”

“She came back to work, came to Balhae Station, because they begged her to. She told them for months. That her work was like her family, but you and Ha-jin were her family. She had a responsibility to her daughter. She had made a promise to you, her husband...and she meant it. But they begged. They told her they believed she was the only one who could help them save the Earth. That wasn't the lie.”

“What was?”

“Director Choi promised her she'd have a rescue shuttle sent once the mission was completed successfully, that your wife and her team would have around the clock protection from liftoff to meeting you at baggage claim back home. She trusted her.”

“There was never going to be a rescue shuttle, was there?”

“No.”

“Wait…why are you talking about yourself in third person like that?”

“I have a confession to make but I’m afraid to tell you what it is.”

He holds your hand, placing it over his thigh. “Hey. You never have to be afraid with me. You can tell me anything, and I’ll only love you more.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m positive.”

“Okay. Here it goes.” You take a deep breath. “I’m not your wife, and I never was.”

He blinks at you. “Excuse me?”

“Your wife…is dead.”

He just stares at you in confusion. “Huh? But you’re right in front of me. Are you messing with me?”

“No, I’m not. It’s the truth. I’m not your real wife. I’m a clone of her.” You let go of his hand to push down your shirt collar and move your hair to the side, revealing your name followed by a number tattooed on your neck.

He lightly traces the silver letters with his fingertips, as if needing to prove they’re actually a part of your skin and not just stickers like the one on his bodycam. You pull your collar back up and let your hair fall back into place. You turn to look at Yun-jae again, though neither of you make a move to hold hands again.

“Your real wife died after being exposed to lunar water in the first round of human experiments. She drowned. She didn’t make it. But before she died, she volunteered her genetic material to be used in cloning so she could continuously be an adult test subject for the lunar water in the name of saving humanity. The scientists of Balhae Station were trying to brute-force the development of an immunity to the lunar water's effects by exposing dozens of clones of a pre-teen to it - Luna - hoping one would prove to be naturally immune. But your wife thought just a child’s body wasn’t enough. She thought there should be testing done on adult subjects too. Morally bankrupt, but scientifically sound - it was basically enforced natural selection. They took your wife’s DNA and, after her death, they mass-produced her in Balhae Station for years along with Lunas. You saw the room with all the Lunas in body bags, didn’t you?”

He can only shakily nod, too stunned to speak.

“There’s failed clones of me kept in body bags too. But I purposefully kept you away from that area of Balhae Station. I didn’t want you to see. I still don’t want you to see. You should know that I was grown in a lab with all of your wife’s memories like the others, but I’m the only one who survived. All of the Lunas and copies of your wife were clones, meaning they were genetically identical, which in turn means that after your wife didn't survive the lunar water, all of her clones should’ve shown the exact same reaction. Yet Luna 073 and I still somehow came out on top, immune to the incredibly virulent effects of lunar water. There was genetic engineering going on, so Luna and I may have been altered in this fashion. Let me show you.”

You show Yun-jae the video log of the experiments done on you and your clones. At the same time, Dr. Song finds the station's missing research data in Wonkyong's room, which includes details of the SAA's experiments of lunar water on genetically-modified clone children tagged with Luna numbers. The girl, Luna 073, and you are the only clones who did not die, and you are the only survivors of the Balhae accident.

“Lunar water injected. Proceeding with first human test. Dr. Han shows no signs of life. Prepare her genetic material for cloning.”

“What did they do?” Yun-jae breathes in shock as he watches his wife die over and over and over and over in the pursuit of saving humanity.

“Y/N 027, failed. Y/N 037, failed. Y/N 041, failed. Y/N 054 shows no signs of life…” And then came your number which is different from Luna’s 073. It turned out that getting a successful adult clone was either harder or easier than a child clone. “…all vital signs are stable. No proliferation of lunar water detected. No adverse reaction in the body cells.”

Minutes that feel like hours pass until you finally conclude your harrowing tale.

“…So our creators were killed and Luna and I ran. If your wife didn’t want a synthetic organism made in her likeness, she wouldn’t have sold her genetic material to a shady company for a higher water rank.”

“Let me get this straight… Y/N…”

“No, I’m not her. You can keep calling me that, but I am not her. But if you wanna know anything else about me, or where I come from, I’m an open book.”

“Okay. Okay. Okay. So my wife died and you’re one of her clones? The only surviving one? The last surviving remnant of her?”

“Yes. You believed her to be dead all these years, and that’s technically true, as the original version of her died in the experiments. But me, a perfect carbon copy with all of her memories, thoughts, and emotions, survived.”

“Prove it. Answer my questions.”

“Okay. Ask me anything.”

“How did we meet?”

“You were both in the same college program. She was better at chemistry than you were, and you hated her for it, a fact you made plainly clear. After graduation, you were happy you’d never have to see that smug face of hers ever again. Until of course, in her true style - she called out of the blue to say she'd set you up with a job at the SAA, where she'd been working. You don't know if she mistook your hatred for healthy competition - or what it was all about. Your wife had this infuriating habit of expecting the best out of people. She confused you into being nice to her - I dare say I miss her almost as much as you and Ha-jin must. Is it possible to miss myself? I don’t know.”

“How did my wife and I become friends?”

“You worked together at the SAA. Though you were in different departments and had totally different jobs, you kept crossing paths and started talking in the hallways and at lunch. She was a good friend. The two of you worked together a lot back then. You kept your love life a secret for the longest time. Your coworkers didn’t even know you were together. You didn’t even announce your engagement. They saw the engagement ring on her finger and then she had no choice but to come clean. Instead of a big wedding, you eloped. You didn’t have much of a honeymoon. You went on a romantic weekend getaway trip to your family’s cabin and went back to work on Monday. Ha-jin was conceived shortly after.”

“Did we live in that cabin after Ha-jin was born?”

“Not quite. Your wife would come out there for months at a time, with you and your daughter. Back then you were still working for the SAA while she was a stay at home mom in between jobs. Ha-jin wasn’t in school yet, so she was good to go anywhere. And you used to like it there. Those were good times.”

He keeps questioning you like that until he’s satisfied by your answers to what he thinks are increasingly harder, near impossible questions. You’re walking around with his wife’s face, her life, her history. You even think like her!

“This is amazing,” you say, your voice filled with awe.

“What is?”

“That she picked you. That means, in some way, I would pick you. It’s like, why?”

“I don’t know. Maybe you had to be there.”

“Listen, I know you’re having a hard day. Not worse than mine, but it sucks to be you right now. You seem like a nice guy. What she did to you isn’t fair. And you really saved my ass back there. So, I don’t know…you wanna take your earbud out, take our clothes off, and see where things go?”

He snorts in disbelief. “That’s exactly what she said to me the first night we made love.”

“Man. She’s stealing all my moves. Or I guess I’m stealing hers. Anyway, you get what I’m hinting at. I mean, you’re my husband, right? I’m curious. If I bought the car, I wanna look under the hood.”

“But you’re not my wife.”

“No, I’m not. I’m a murderer who’s lied to you this whole time. But I haven’t gotten any action for the past five years. So, what do you say? We doing this or not?”

“Oh…it is tempting, but I can’t. She’s my wife. Not you.”

Instead of looking hurt or rejected, you smile. “I’m proud of you, Yun-jae. I knew I wouldn’t be able to resist your charms. The question was, could you resist mine? And you did. You’re a loyal person. I’m sorry that the wife you know isn’t here. I’m sorry I’m not your wife…but I could be if you let me.”

“Is that why you took my wife’s wedding ring and put it on your finger?”

“Well, I know it sounds bad when you say it like that, but I don’t think about it like grave robbing. I mean, yes, I stole her name tag and her clothes and spacesuit. But, It’s more like what I did with her phone. I found something in storage that no one was using, I picked it up, and I kept it. She left her things here. I scrolled through her pictures and videos on her camera roll and that’s when I saw you. My - her husband. You were in tears, begging her to come home. I knew your wife died. But when I scrolled through the pictures of you on her phone, and watched all those videos she filmed over the years, it was like you were talking to me like I was her. I decided then that I didn’t have the heart to tell you that she was gone if and when I made it back to Earth. I would pick up where she left off, and you and Ha-jin would be none the wiser. You’d be mad for a while, but then you’d be happy. We’d be happy. It didn’t seem fair that she got to have this perfect life and I was gonna be left here in some secret mining colony on the moon forever or shipped off to some government lab to be held captive and poked and prodded at like an animal. I don’t know why, but I wanted that perfect life she had.”

“Perfect? Her life was far from perfect.”

“Was it? A loving husband, a bright and beautiful daughter, a warm and welcoming home. It seemed perfect to me. It had been so long since your wife left home, and I look exactly like her, so I thought everyone would just accept me. God, and thinking about it, it felt so good! I never had a real family, Yun-jae. I never had anyone except Luna. I wanted to live my life freely as a human, with full human rights. So I called for a rescue shuttle to come so I could come home to you and Ha-jin. But, instead, they killed everyone. I escaped with Luna through the vents. We couldn’t save anyone but ourselves. Years went by, one thing led to another, and then I met you. I saw you in the flesh for the first time in the medical bay, and it was so bittersweet. Looking at your face, I felt as if I’d known you for years, even though we technically only just met. Still, there was so much I wanted to say to you. But I had to protect myself and Luna first and foremost.”

“Um, this is a big reveal. I…I don’t really know what to say.”

“Yeah. It’s a lot to process all at once. I know it’s overwhelming, but it’s a huge weight off my shoulders. Just remember, Yun-jae: I may not be the original, but I am still a perfect copy. I’m the woman you fell in love with in every way. Why should it matter if I was grown in a lab and that my name isn’t really Y/N? That doesn’t change who I am now. That doesn’t change what we have.” You scoot closer.

Yun-jae backs away, sweating, panicking.

“I’m still technically the one you built something with, Yun-jae. You can still build something with me. What about our life, Yun-jae? Director Choi is gonna destroy everything we have if we let her! Do the right thing and let’s take our life back.”

“Our life? We have no life. What we have is a lie!”

“What you have is a wife who loves you. And as surely as your wife wanted to save untold lives with her sacrifice, Director Choi took your wife’s life with her lies. She took her from you with those lies. But she also brought her back to you through me. I’m made from her. Everything that she was, I am too. Don’t you see? I’m still the one you fell in love with, honey.”

“Don’t call me that. You’re just using her face and her name. You really want to take over her life?”

“I know it sounds selfish of me to want everything that she had, to want you. I know things between us aren’t perfect. We’ve hurt each other. I’m a murderer. But if you stopped overthinking it, you’d realize that nothing has to change. Nothing has to be different from the way it was. I may look a little different, but I’m still the woman you should be in love with.”

“But you don’t love me back!”

“Of course I love you back!”

“No, you don’t. You’re only saying that because you have her memories and don’t know any different.“

“I know I just met you, but you look all right to me! You’re tall and handsome, loyal and brave… What’s not to love about you? Honey, you made a vow to me. Remember? Forever and always.”

“Vow? Are you kidding? Our marriage would be bullshit. Your plan is idealistic and flawed. How can we possibly go back to Earth and pretend that everything is fine?”

“I know I’m asking a lot of you and my request may seem unreasonable, but I assure you it’s not impossible. I know you can’t see my vision of our future now, but what I have in mind for us and Ha-jin can be more than just a beautiful dream. But it’ll be very hard to make into a reality. We won’t live happily ever after at first, but we’ll get there eventually. You just have to believe in and out your trust in me, your crew, Luna, and yourself. Try to think of it, Yun-jae. Our home, our dreams, our past, our future, and… Our daughter.”

“Our? There is no our. All of those things are mine. My daughter… Do you expect me to be able to go along with your plan and lie to Ha-jin for the rest of her life?”

“I know it sounds deceptive and cruel, but I’ve thought about it every which way, played out every possible ‘What if she knew the truth? What if we told her?’ scenario I could think of in my head, and I kept coming to the same conclusion. Keeping her unaware is really what’s best for her.”

“Even when she’s an adult?”

“Yes, even then. It’s a secret we should take to our graves. It’s how we’ll keep her safe. Isn’t that what we, as her parents, should want for her?”

He rubs his temples. “Just stop it. You’re confusing me. I thought you were my wife…and my crew…all those people think you’re someone else…”

“I know! I don’t blame you if you hate me now. I don’t blame you if you want to kill me.” Your head falls back into your hands. The tears stream down.

Captain Han knows that this moment will define the rest of his life. What kind of a man is he going to be?

He takes deep breaths to steady himself and his racing thoughts. He kneels down beside you, and takes your hands in his own. “Honey…” Knowing what he knows now, the pet name he used to use for you so often feels odd on his tongue, yet it feels right at the same time. “Look at me. I love…you. Whether your name is Y/N…”

“It’s not.”

“Still, you may be right. I made a vow to you. The woman I met years ago. If we just talk to Ha-jin, I’m sure we can work this out. And, as much as I hate to admit it, I agree with you that we can never tell her the truth. She’ll never understand and she’ll never be safe if she finds out.”

“As the saying goes, ignorance is bliss,” you try to joke to lighten the mood. You quickly become serious again. “The less she knows, the safer she’ll be from Director Choi and people like her. People who are greedy, selfish, and corrupt. People who might want to steal our work or misuse it for their own agendas. Director Choi won’t live forever, but we can’t be certain that, someday, someone just as bad or worse won’t try to be opportunistic and take her place.”

“Right. But from me… You don’t need to hide anything. I’ll accept you for who you are. And you’re right about something else: How you came into existence shouldn’t matter. I’ll take any version of you I can get over not having you at all. But what about Luna?”

“She’s a reasonable person.”

“Tell that to my dead crewmates.”

“Like I said, she’s probably scared, okay? She’d never do anything violent unless she felt threatened. You don’t know her. But you will if you give her a chance! If we’re gonna make this marriage work, we have to trust each other. It might be hard sometimes. We might even have to kill a few more people. But I promise, no more secrets. I guarantee, whatever your wife did will never affect our lives going forward. It may as well have never happened—”

He looks as if he’s about to protest and argue with you, but you gently place your hand on his mouth to stop him and let you finish.

“—but I’d never go so far as to ask you to forget your wife or discard all traces of the memories you have of her. I’d never demand for you to carry on with your life by pretending that none of what you or Ha-jin went through five years ago was real just for my sake. It happened. There’s no denying it, but there’s no changing it either. All we can do now is move forward. We promised each other till death do we part and, in a manner of speaking, I was brought back from the dead. I was brought back to you to be your wife again. I will love you until the day you die, Yun-jae. But until then, you will know me as your wife, even if I’m not actually her. If you can accept that, then be my husband again. Right now. Do you accept that, Yun-jae? Do you?”

“…I don’t know. I think-I think I can. Maybe. I want to, but…this-this is all happening so fast.”

“I know it’s hard, but please…forgive your wife. Better yet, don’t forgive Director Choi. Get angry, and leave and go home.”

“You keep telling me to turn back and come home, but I can't do that. Not just yet.” He parrots the last words you ever said to him before you went to the moon.

You sigh and look out the window. “She and Ha-jin talked a lot about the silent sea.”

He remembers.

You were lying next to Ha-jin in her hospital bed, her head on your shoulder while you read a story to her. Your husband sat in a chair by the bedside, watching you both. The children’s book was full of colorful pictures. You pointed to one of the night sky.

“Hey. It’s the moon. Do you see those dark spots? It’s called ‘The Silent Sea.’ Long ago, Galileo thought that was a sea. That’s why he named it the silent sea. But once we got to the moon, there was no sea.”

“Just like how it is here. I heard all of this used to be the sea a long time ago. The Earth will end up like the moon. Right?”

You kissed Ha-jin’s forehead and rubbed her arm as you squeezed it lightly in reassurance. “Don’t worry. One day, your dad and I will fill up this entire place and turn it back into the sea.”

“You will?”

“Yes. Wait and see. One day, it’ll happen.”

“She really wanted to come back. She also thought a lot about you, you know. She even…” You trail off.

“What? What is it?”

“Well… There, kinda, were these letters. One was for you and the other was for Ha-jin. The envelopes have your and her names on them.”

“Did you read them?”

“I know what they say because, technically, I remember writing them. Still, I…wanted to open them. This one time, I almost did. Figured you’d never, ever receive either of them. But then I thought…if you did manage to make it here, your wife wouldn’t want me to keep them from you. So I just, sorta, kept them…for you.”

“Wait… So there really are letters?”

“Oh…yeah. Wanna read them?” You get up and open a drawer, sifting through some books before handing him the letters tucked inside. “Here.”

He opens the envelopes but… “They’re both empty. Y/N, there’s nothing in them!”

“What?! But… I didn’t take them! I swear!”

“Well, where are they then?”

“I-I must’ve lost them! I gotta find them!” You’re frantic and about to run out of the room, but he grabs your arm to pull you back.

“Wait! You can’t go out and let anyone see you like this! We have to do something about your tattoo!”

Together, you use a device or laser to cover up or remove your name and number tattooed on your neck. Your skin looks clear. Like your name and number was never there.

“Come on, we need to go.” He grabs your hand.

“But I need to find those letters! They were the last things she wrote before she died! They have to be in the station somewhere!”

“There’s no time! Come with me!” He insists, trying to pull you along with him.

“I’ll make time! I’ll find them and make my way back to you, I swear! Now let me go!” You break free from his grip and are about to run off, but he stops you by grabbing your arm again.

“Wait! There’s something I want to give you first,” he says.

You turn back to look at him. “What is it?”

He holds out a white band with a small device in it. “Location tracker. For just in case."

Your eyes soften as you realize why he’s so paranoid. He lost you once. He doesn’t want to lose you again. You stay still just long enough to let your husband put the location tracker around your ankle. Once he confirms on his device that the tracker is functional, you bolt out of the room and through the vents and corridors, ignoring his desperate calls for you to wait and come back. You’re on your own personal mission and won’t come back until it’s successfully completed. He should’ve known. In all the time he knew you, one thing about you never changed: Your stubbornness. Once you had your mind set on something, there was nothing and nobody who could change it. Not even him.

At the same time, Dr. Song is getting closer to Luna.

“Would you... Would you like some of this food? Mm? Here.”

Luna tries to eat the candy without taking it out of the plastic wrapper. She immediately spits it out in disgust.

“No, no. Here, I'll show you.” Once Dr. Song shows her how, Luna takes the candy from her and eats it. She then stares out the window.

“Oh. That one's Earth. Do you know what Earth is?”

“Ea...Earth...”

They turn when they hear someone enter the room from behind.

“Officer Gong, put down the gun.”

“Move aside, Dr. Song.”

“I swear, I can calm her down. It's all right.”

“You saw what she did to our crew members. Get out of the way.”

“I've been with her this whole time, and she hasn't attacked me. She won't try to hurt us anymore. Please put down the gun, Officer Gong.”

“I found Dr. Song and the target. I failed to secure the capsule or locate the other target.”

You and Captain Han rush down separate corridors.

“Ryu Taesuk is headed your way. Escort them both to the main lab. I’ve talked to the other survivor and confirmed she is my wife. She’s no longer a target. If you see her, do not shoot her. That’s an order.”

“‘If’? What do you mean, ‘if we see her’? Is she not with you? Did you lose her?”

“I let her go.”

“You what? How could you do that?”

“I had to.”

“But why?”

“Are you questioning your Captain’s decision? She’s looking for misplaced letters she wrote to me and our daughter. She wants to bring them back to Earth with her because they hold sentimental value to her. Satisfied? Or do you want to waste more precious time questioning my authority? She is not a threat. She will not attack, so do not get in her way. I repeat, if you see my wife, do not shoot. We need them both alive, understood? I repeat, don't kill them. Do you think you can manage that?”

When Captain Han sees Lieutenant Ryu getting splashed with lunar water, he decides that the traitorous Tae-suk isn't worth a bullet and allows him to suffer a much more protracted and painful death. However, some of the water particles splash onto his skin as well, causing him to become infected.

Everyone is gathered in the medical bay. You and Luna are off to the side, playing together while everyone watches. You joined them after you found the letters you were looking for in record time, though you nearly scared the crap out of them with the noise you made from when you crawled through an overhead vent instead of using the door because it was quicker that way. You’re keeping the letters safe in your pocket. You just need to give them to Yun-jae when there’s an opportune moment to do so.

“So she’s really the Captain’s wife?”

“Yes, it would appear so. She’s been alive all this time,” Dr. Hong confirms.

Unbeknownst to them, Captain Han has no intention of telling them that you’re a clone. They don’t need to know what you really are. He fears you’ll be killed if they know.

“So we've now confirmed they can survive contact with lunar water?”

“Looks like it. Lunar water has similar characteristics to a virus that changes each time it comes into contact with a new host. As we can see, a pretty major change took place when it came into contact with them. Or at least contact with whatever they put inside the Captain’s wife and Luna. Something unknown inside their bodies.”

“These researchers at Balhae Station…the Captain’s wife…studied cell fusion and genetic recombination as ways to make humans survive lunar water. And the organism they created as a result is named Luna. Human experiments and human cloning, both illegal.”

“So that means...the reason the government shut down this station five years ago was because they cared more about hiding the experiments than about the results or retrieving the lunar water. If this gets out, it'll cause a panic. I mean, shit.”

“It's considered an act of treason for us to disclose state secrets no matter what the secrets are.”

“You realize, even if we swear to never speak of this again, no one in charge will believe us for the rest of our lives! People will watch our every move, or we might just end up dead like the crew members here!”

“That's why Director Choi wanted me and Captain Han here. I see the logic. She probably thought we wouldn't be able to tell the truth. The atrocious crimes my sister and his wife committed as head researchers.”

Captain Han enters the medical bay.

“What happened to Lieutenant Ryu?”

“We aren't safe here anymore. Something's wrong.”

“What do you mean, Captain?”

“A shaft blew up during my struggle with the Lieutenant. There was spurting water. Dr. Song. Are you all right? Dr. Song!”

She doesn’t answer. She suddenly feels unwell.

A few moments later, Captain Han’s vision turns completely blue. He looks down at his hands. He sees starfish. Dr. Song experiences similar symptoms at the same time. They were exposed to lunar water at some point during the mission.

"What's wrong?"

He and Dr. Song don't say anything. They just turn and rush to another room, closing and locking the door behind themselves in an attempt to self isolate before they can infect Officer Gong and Dr. Hong.

"Dr. Song. Captain Han. Are you all right? Dr. Song!Captain!"

"What is it? Dr. Song. Captain. Let us help. Open up!"

"I'm sorry." Captain Han and Dr. Song both say, breathing heavily.

"Are you feeling sick?"

They hunch over, holding their stomachs.

"Dr. Song!"

"Captain Han!"

"Wait, I..."

"Dr. Song!"

"Captain!"

“What’s the problem? Open up! I'm sure we can help you! Dr. Song! Captain!”

“Captain Han! Dr. Song!”

Being shorter and smaller than him, Dr. Song starts vomiting first. Captain Han’s tall stature means it takes longer for the cells to multiply enough to infect his entire body, but the few seconds he has over Dr. Song to get a few more short, uneven breaths in don’t last long enough to make much of a difference as he also succumbs. The remaining crew watch helplessly in horror as Dr. Song and Captain Han vomit copious amounts of water. The last thing they see is you and Luna watching them from the window. They both lose consciousness. While Dr. Song dreams of her sister, Captain Han dreams of you and his daughter.

“Ji-an. Are you all right?”

“Yun-jae. Are you feeling okay?”

“What happened?” Captain Han and Dr. Song both ask.

“You were infected just like the others were. But somehow, your bodies are fighting back. I think...possibly, Luna's and your wife’s mutated genes, they act like a sort of antibody. They suppress the multiplication of lunar water in your bodies. Or It could be you're both just lucky. I’ll have to keep an eye on both of you. It's too early to tell, but...this poor girl and your poor wife…they just might be the key to saving the whole world.”

“She's Luna.” Dr. Song says.

“She’s Y/N.” Captain Han says at the same time.

“What?”

“Those are their names. Luna and Y/N.”

"The backup from SAA has entered the landing orbit. Just as you mentioned, we spotted another spacecraft also entering orbit around the same time."

"It's probably a small transport ship often used by RX mercenaries."

"We need more time to retrieve the capsules. We'll have no way of saving them once RX mercenaries arrive. Please give us a hand in delaying their spacecraft from landing."

"What will happen to Luna and Y/N? What will happen to them after they're brought to Earth?"

"Mrs. Han will be free to return home and be with her family. Although, since you’ve reported and proven to us that she’s adapted to lunar water, she may be put under tests to further the research on it.”

“I won’t let my wife be treated like a guinea pig and subjected to inhumane tests in a cold and sterile government lab!”

“No, no. Of course not. These tests would be conducted only when absolutely necessary. Think of it like a doctor’s appointment. A blood draw every six months. A full physical exam once out of the year. It’d all be painless. It’d be nothing your wife hasn’t done before. It’d be no different from what everyone has done at some point in their lives so medical professionals can monitor their health. Bringing her back from the dead will be a legal hassle, but not impossible. Once successful completion of their mission has been confirmed, she and Captain Han will be rewarded with a higher water rank as promised. But lunar water and Subject 073 do not officially exist in this world. She’ll be sent to a Grade One facility at the Ministry of National Defense. And our government will continue with the experiments conducted at the station.”

"That’s too dangerous. The lunar water is still very unstable. It can put the entire Earth in danger. And if she’s sent there, Luna will only be used as a tool to study the lunar water."

"What about my request?"

"Unfortunately, Director Choi holds a strong political position, so everyone is hesitant to step up."

"What is he talking about?"

"Captain Han asked me to contact a higher official who can keep Director Choi under control. The lunar water and Subject 073 cannot be monopolized by anybody. Captain Han and I agreed upon that. Thankfully, more people in the SAA are starting to see the problem in this. I will come up with a measure before you return to Earth."

The remaining crew agrees that, though lunar water is dangerous, it could be the salvation of humanity, but if they take Luna to Earth, she will be treated as an experiment forever. Dr. Song suggests that they take Luna to the International Institute of Space Biology, a space station and neutral territory, to ensure both Luna's safety and that the benefits of further researching the lunar water will be shared with everyone.

"The International Institute of Space Biology. We cannot return to Earth. The IISB. We should be safe there. This must be studied in a neutral area to stop anybody from monopolizing the lunar water. I'll take Luna there myself."

"Location tracker. For just in case." But Captain Han hesitates and almost gives the other location tracker to Dr. Song so she can put it on Luna instead of him.

"You can put it on her... It looks like now she trusts you."

Luna stands up. While you offered your leg to your husband right away, Luna is hesitant. She looks to you and Dr. Song first for reassurance before offering her leg and letting Captain Han put the tracker on her ankle. Her eyes are drawn to his bodycam with the cartoon face on it. You recognized that sticker as belonging to your daughter when you first saw it.

When he notices Luna staring at it, he offers it to her. She snatches it from his hand right away, admiring it.

"She’s not wary of you anymore. If she goes to Earth, she’ll die in a lab."

"They won't give up on lunar water. Her fate won't be any different no matter where she goes. Luna and Y/N are coming to Earth with us."

"You're calling her Luna now. Just as you said, we're desperate, and we end up making the wrong decisions. And those decisions always come with a price. We cannot repeat the same mistake."

"The only choice I can make right now is to complete this mission for my wife and daughter's sakes. Right, honey?” He turns to look at you for support and reassurance in his stance.

You nod. “Right. We’ve come too far and lost too much to give up or turn back now. We’ll go home together and, once this is all over and we return to Earth, we’ll go to the hospital and visit Ha-jin. She will have me back. She will have both of her parents and we’ll be a family again.”

“Do you promise?”

“I promise.”

He kisses you. As he does, he thinks of when he saw Ha-jin in the hospital just before he went on this mission and what her doctor told him.

"You'll need a higher water classification to stop her condition from worsening. If her condition worsens, she may lose her legs forever. There isn't much we can do with the class you currently hold."

He loves you both so much that he wants to save you and his daughter at all costs. Even if it means doing so at the cost of his own life. He kisses you like it’s the last kiss he’ll ever be able to give you. Like he’s savoring the moment because it’s his last chance to feel your lips against his.

When everything goes to shit and the station starts flooding with lunar water, you do everything in your power to ensure your husband’s survival at all costs. You and Luna lead him and the surviving crew to safety. You don’t need help suiting up so, while Dr. Song helps Luna and Yun-jae puts on the rest of his gear, you try to open the door. But the door won’t open due to sensor failure. In order for the group to ascend to safety, they need to activate the decompression chamber from outside. While nobody’s looking, you bravely volunteer yourself to activate the airlock, much to the horror of the others, especially your husband, when they find out what you’ve done. He’s the Captain. If anyone is to go down with the station, it should be him. Not you. That was his plan.

“Where are you? What are you doing?” He demands. “Why didn’t you stay by my side like I told you to?”

“You should go first,” you say, your back to him. If you look him in the eye, you’ll lose your nerve.

“No. No, we can’t. You said we’d go back together! No, wait. Open this. Hold on! Stop this thing! We said we’d complete this mission for our daughter! No, you… Honey! You can’t stay here!”

You turn to face him from the other side of the door. “Wherever Luna goes…please be there with her.”

“No…don’t do this. I just got you back. I can’t lose you again. Not now. Please.”

“Yun-jae, it’s okay. It’s what I want. Whatever my fate ends up being, I’m at peace with it because I chose it. If this is it…just know that I’ve loved you very, very much.”

“This isn’t it, darling. We won’t let this be it!”

“If this is it… I leave behind no regrets because I successfully completed my mission. I found the letters she left for you and Ha-jin. They’re tucked safely in your space suit. Right here.” You point to a pocket. You remember word-for-word what the letter his wife wrote says. Looking deeply into his eyes, you recite it to him in what you think are your last moments, your voice thick and heavy with emotion as your eyes water.

“My dear Yun-jae, are you well? Though I'd like nothing more than to see you again, I'm afraid I no longer have the ability to do so. You don't know how many times I've thought about you over the years. I often wonder if you hate me for what I did. Do you? When I decided to leave, I was only thinking of you and our child. When I became pregnant with Ha-jin, I was so happy. But I was also afraid. Infant mortality was so high, and among the main causes mentioned were various infections and diseases caused by the consumption of contaminated water. I couldn't bear exposing our daughter, that tiny life, to such danger. And when she had her accident and became sick, I knew your position, and understood you didn't have the option to leave the SAA right then and there. I knew you couldn’t come with me. It wasn't an easy decision to leave. I know it was very cruel to you too. But I thought it was something I had to do…for the sake of everyone's future. I thought that, if this mission succeeded, it could save humanity. Even though I did the only thing I could, I'll always regret leaving you and Ha-jin that way.

But there are two bright spots in this sad story, and they are you, Yun-jae, my dear husband, and our lovely daughter, Ha-jin. My departure all those years ago will give you both the chance to live in a world where fish swim, plants flourish, and waterfalls rush. And now, though my time here is likely drawing to a close, and even though our life together had to end like this, I still wouldn't trade it for the world. We had some wonderful years together. I like to think we'll meet again someday, somehow. Even if it’s in a way neither of us expect. I told my colleagues to give this letter to a surviving Luna, so that she could give it to you after I'm gone, in the event neither me, nor any of my clones, nor any of my colleagues survived our mission.

If I’m standing in front of you now and giving you this letter, that means one of two things. The first, highly improbable outcome: That the experimentation of lunar water on an adult body was successful on the very first trial. That I’m still alive and there was no need for further cloning. Or the second, much more likely outcome: That, as you read this, I'm already dead. That I died but one of my clones survived alongside one of the Luna clones. I'm so sorry for what I did to you, did to us... I can't tell you to remember me, but I can't bear for you to forget me. You've given me so much and I haven't been able to return a single thing. You may feel sorry for me. Sorry that I died on the moon, in a dark and cold place without you. Don’t be. What’s wrong with dying alone? Who says dying alone can’t be peaceful? Humans are fundamentally alone, but we forget because we’re afraid. Arguing otherwise won’t change that. Once you accept it, it stops being so overwhelming. If we weren’t fundamentally alone, how could we ever truly love someone else? You’ve been in love before. And you can be again. Whether it’s with me or another woman, you are capable of loving and deserve to be loved in return. That's why I want you to live for yourself and Ha-jin now. Do what's best for you and for her.

Yun-jae... You made me happy. Even now, the thought of seeing your face in some capacity after my death warms my heart. No matter what happens to me, be well and be happy, honey. Well, this letter has gone on too long, so I'll say goodbye. Goodbye, but just for now.”

Captain Han watches as the water consumes you seconds later. Staying behind in raging lunar waters looks like certain death. He cries. He yells in agony until his throat is sore. He repeatedly hits the walls with his fists. But they have to go. When he and the remaining crew make it outside, they find remains of a spacesuit. They follow a set of footprints and see Luna standing without her spacesuit. A few feet away, they find you, injured but alive. You surprisingly got blasted out of the space station alive. Even more surprising, once outside the station, it turns out that both your and Luna’s genetic modifications enable you to survive exposure to the moon’s vacuum (the moon has such a rarefied atmosphere that in any practical case can be defined as vacuum) without a space suit. You don’t need the suit or the helmet and can breathe just fine in the lunar atmosphere. You and Yun-jae hold each other in a tight embrace, unwilling to let go even as he helps you stand up. You both shed tears of relief. Moments later, a bright light shines down on you from overhead, making you break apart to shield your eyes as the rescue shuttle arrives to take you all back to Earth. You’re finally going home.

The first thing you and Yun-jae do upon arriving home is go to the hospital. Your husband has you sit and wait in the hallway outside Ha-jin’s room for a few minutes while he talks to her. Though he knows Ha-jin will be excited to have you back, he wants to explain the situation to her as gently as he can to soften the blow your sudden reappearance into her life will inevitably give her. You and he both know she’ll recognize your face despite the years apart and you coming back from the dead will be a shock to her system no matter what he does or says. It’ll take time for her and for you to adjust to a new normal, but the least he can do is give you both time and help Ha-jin understand why you and he lied to her about your work and cause of death. When Ha-jin first sees you, it’s a highly emotional and tearful reunion, albeit awkward at first. You were dead for years and suddenly you’re alive again. Still, the awkwardness quickly wears off when she shows you her drawings and stickers. You do arts and crafts together, play together, hug and kiss. It’s like you never left. But you did. You have a long, serious talk about it.

“I thought of this moment, of our reunion, every day for the past five years. When your father and I stepped through the door and I walked through these halls towards your room after so many years away… I was afraid, Ha-jin. I was afraid you didn’t really want me to come home. I didn’t know if you’d hate me or pity me... Or maybe I’d just disgust you... I remember when you were little, when your father and I came to see you in the hospital, I could tell how hard it was on you...and now look at you. You’ve grown up so much. How old are you now?”

“Um, I turned twelve last week.”

“I’m sorry I’m late, but… Happy twelfth birthday, Ha-jin. I love you so, so, much,” you say with a watery, bittersweet smile.

She bursts into tears. “In my dreams, I saw the moon. You promised that you’d take me there someday. But you never did. I felt so pathetic and ugly laying here, waiting for you... Every day I dreamed that I was with you, but then you’d go away and I’d be alone... In our 'special place'... Waiting for you... Waiting for you to come to see me. But you never did. And so I waited. And when I woke up, I stared up at the cracks in the ceiling and all I could think about is how unfair it all is...”

Both you and Yun-jae hug her as she rambles and cries. Together, you wrap her in a cocoon of love and warmth. You and he rub and pat her back and pet her hair as you console her. You just hold and hush her until she calms down.

“Shhh. Shhh. I know. I know you thought I was dead, that you grieved and mourned me all these years. And now I’m trying to come back into your life as if nothing happened and causing you even more pain. I know I've done a terrible thing to you. Something you might never forgive me for. I wish I could change that, but I can't. I’ll always be sorry about how I left you. That's why I understand if you do hate me. But I want you to know this, Ha-jin. Even if you hate me, I'll always love you. I did what I did for you, to give you a better world to live in. To give you the future you deserve. I understand if you don’t think I deserve it but, if you’ll give me a chance to be your mother again, I promise I’ll stay this time. I’ll never go away again.”

“Pinky swear?” She sticks her pinky out towards you.

You lock your pinky around hers, kissing her hand. “I pinky swear.” You then open your purse and pull out an envelope. “I have something for you. I wrote this to you when I was on the moon. I didn’t know if I’d make it back to Earth, if I’d make it back to you and your dad or not. It’s five years late, but I’m glad I’m here so I can give it to you now. Consider it part of your birthday present.”

She opens the letter. You and Yun-jae hold hands and watch as her eyes dart from side to side as she reads it.

Ha-jin,

I know you're upset with me for leaving, and you should be. I shouldn't have come here, I see that now. I don’t know if I’m going to make it back home - I don’t even know if this letter will ever reach you. If the world is good, and I do believe that it is, then I will see you again for I had hoped to have a lifetime to teach you everything you need to know. I wish I had a lifetime for you to teach me everything I need to know. I'll do my best in the short time I have left.

I am imperfect, I am flawed, but my love for you is not. The same can be said of your father. And Ha-jin, about your father... I know you hate him because you think he leaves you alone too much and you miss him, but please give him a chance. It's true he may be a little surly sometimes, and he doesn't laugh much. But underneath he's really a sweet person.

You aren't perfect either. I see you trying to be perfect, but you don't need to be. You just need to find life that fills you with energy and purpose. Be fair, and truthful, and take care of those who need you. The rest, well, that's the living.

I want to throw everything at the wall right now, every bit of motherly advice. School, boys, college, career, travel, marriage - but my mind keeps returning to something small. The memory won’t get out of the way of the advice, so maybe it’s more important.

Dad and I dropped you off to your very first day of school. You were wearing that shirt with the horses on it, the really ugly one. It was the first thing you picked out for yourself and you were so proud of it. As you ran to beat the first bell, Dad made us late - doubt that will ever change - and I remember asking your father, "Do you think she’s ready?" He was too nervous to even guess. It's funny what makes you worry.

That's not the story. The story starts later that night. You had locked yourself in your room after school. Your dad couldn’t lure you out, and it took a lot of pushing to get you to let me in. It took even longer to get the story out of you. If you don't remember, your classmates had made fun of your shirt, and you had cried. You were hiding because you thought your dad and I would be upset that you had cried. You felt you had let us down.

First, there's nothing you could do to let us down. Don't ever forget that. We will be proud of you long after we’re gone, long after you’re gone too. That’s just how it is. But here’s why I bring this up again… The next day, you went back in, and you wore that shirt again. And the next day. For the next few weeks it took a crowbar to get that thing away from you long enough to get it washed.

Each time you’d wear the shirt, the same kids would make fun of you, and each day you’d come home looking just about as despondent as can be. I remember I asked you why you kept wearing the shirt, and you told me, very seriously, “I want people to like me.” My first thought was, okay, great, let’s go burn that shirt. But then I understood what you really meant. You wanted people to like you. Even then you knew that you had to be yourself, even when it’s the most difficult thing you could possibly be. It would have been easier to hide who you were, but you wouldn’t even consider doing that. You wanted people to like you, the real you. The Ha-jin I know who is brilliant, kind, strong, a little bit of a dork (hey, takes one to know one) and determined to live her life like it’s an adventure.

I think of that often because that day is when I knew you were going to be okay, no matter what life threw your way.

I was hoping to have this conversation when you were older, a phrase which I know always upsets you, but you do deserve an explanation. I wanted to...explain everything to you one day. Please know that I had a chance to save the lives of a lot of good people. Sometimes as a parent, the best way to show your love is by doing everything in your power to make the world a better place. Sometimes, the best option is to stay home, to ignore the world and make your home a better place. I wish there was a way to do both, because that’s what you deserve.

One day you will find yourself facing a similar choice. If I’m not there to help you decide, think about that little girl in the ugly horse shirt (sorry, kiddo, that thing was grim). She knows what to do. Trust me, she’s who I think of whenever I need help myself. More than anything, I want to make it home to see you grow up. I want to show you the sea. I love you today, and always, and even when I’m gone.

Be good. Be a little bad. Be who you are.

Love, Mom

P.S. Please tell your father if he wants to hear what I have to say to him, he should look up the word ‘apology’ in the dictionary.

P.P.S. I’ve left more than a few things behind for you - but I’ll never tell you where. Look and you’ll find them.

P.P.P.S. I’m not talking about my work papers. Your father will lock those up if anything happens to me. Balhae Station is my mission, and you don’t need to pick it up just because you’re my daughter. You’ll find your own adventures.

Later, after you read Ha-jin a bedtime story like you used to do and she falls asleep to your voice, Yun-jae lays down beside you in her hospital room on the pullout bed meant for guests. Not the original you, not the one he married, but the only you that’s left. Together, you watch over your daughter as she finally gets some much needed sleep.

“Are you awake? I moved you because you seemed uncomfortable in Ha-jin’s bed,” Yun-jae murmurs as he adjusts himself so you’ll have more room and be more comfortable. The bed is big enough to fit both of you, but you still find yourself resting your head and arm on your husband’s chest, using him as a pillow and listening to his heartbeat.

“Despite my absence, our daughter grew up strong and sweet just the same. You did well in raising her all by yourself. It couldn’t have been easy.”

“The nightlight you gave her helped for a while. But it started giving her nightmares after you passed.”

“Doctor. Did you say Ha-jin is gone?” He asked, alarmed and concerned.

“Oh. We just located her.”

“So, what happened to her?”

“I'm not so sure. She must've had a bad dream. She kept looking for her mom and just managed to fall asleep.”

“When she first learned that you died, she just didn't want to accept it. She was so angry all the time and she struck out at everyone she loved most. Even me. Especially me. She’d yell at me, asking why you did it. ‘I hate you! I want her back! Give her back to me! I knew it! You didn’t care about her! I hate you, Dad! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!’ It hurt, but I knew she didn’t mean any of it. She was just acting as any kid who lost their mom that they loved very much would. I couldn’t blame her for her reaction. I wasn’t coping much better with your death than she was. Despite it all, no matter how much time passed, she never gave up hope that you were alive somewhere, somehow. She was always waiting for you. She reminds me of you every time she smiles. With her around, I could never forget about you, even if I wanted to. You've been in my thoughts since the day we parted. Just as you’ve been in Ha-jin’s.”

With your mission successfully completed, you both have been given higher water rankings. Ha-jin will receive the treatment she needs and won’t lose her legs. Water will be restored on Earth. Hong and Ji-an both had the water samples and they should be enough to save the planet. A cure to the lunar water disease will be found from Luna and potentially yourself, and will be used to offset the effects of the water, making those vaccines you contributed in creating mandatory in order to drink the water safely.

You look up at your husband, smiling. Your eyes flicker with nictitating membranes as you blink. It’s so quick nobody would notice unless they were looking for it. Ha-jin stared right at you and didn’t notice at all. “I think you made the right choice, honey,” you say, holding his hand.

“It was the only choice I could make.”

“Do you really like me?”

“I do.”

“Do you still love me?”

“I do.”

“Then I will do anything to stay by your side.”

“I know you will. I love you.”

“I love you too. And Ha-jin...I love her like my very own daughter.”

“Well, that’s good because she is your daughter.”

You wrap your arms around each other and share a long, passionate kiss. He pulls away first. He looks at you as if he has something pressing on his mind.

“What’s the matter, honey?”

“Nothing. Nothing’s the matter. Nothing at all. Really.”

“Then why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

“Honey, you always have that look on your face when you want to ask me something important but are unsure how to word it or are scared of how I’ll react. It’s the same look you had when you asked me to marry you and if I wanted to try for a child with you. Is that it? Do you really want to have another baby?”

“No! I mean, not now or anytime soon, but…someday. Maybe. When the water crisis is solved and the Earth is saved. Can you…can you even get pregnant?”

“I…don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it. I’m someone…who might never have a child. You know why, don’t you? I started out as a perfect clone of your wife and I got my menstrual cycle while on Balhae Station, even if it was irregular at times. But then my genetics were altered and I developed mutant abilities and characteristics, but I still bled occasionally. It just wasn’t every month like it used to be. Conditions being what they were and all… So I think…maybe? But then again, the chances of me getting pregnant might have gone down from the experiments and my fertility rate may be incredibly low. I hadn’t ever thought about the implications of what it’d mean if I, a mutant clone, reproduced with a man like you, a normal human. You’re asking me these kinds of questions for a reason. What is it?”

“I’m not sure if this is the right time to say this…but I think I want to sleep with you. I wish I could sugarcoat it, but that would sound too contrived. I’m telling you this instead of holding it in…because I’m worried nothing will happen if I don’t tell you now. I’m always subtracting things in life. I’ve subtracted and subtracted, and finally ended up with a rather simple equation…but I can’t figure out where you fit in. I can’t tell if I want to sleep with you mere hours after meeting you…simply because you’re a woman, or because you’re a clone of my wife and I’m supposed to love you. I hope…it’s simply because you’re a woman.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. Thank you for telling me, honey. And please don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed about how you feel. It’s okay to feel that way. You’re right that we’ve technically only known each other for a few hours, but an hour in space can feel like a year. I won’t be mad or upset if you only want to sleep with me because I’m a clone of her. It’s only natural that you still lust for your wife. That you’re still attracted to her and desire her. You’ve been without her or her touch for far too long, you must be starved of physical affection.”

“It’s not like that. It’s just…”

“Just?”

“I’ve had no trouble sleeping since you arrived. I sleep at night and wake up in the morning. I’m bothered by the changes you’ve made, but more bothered with myself for being so bothered.”

“So you want to do it with me, a woman who bothers you because I’m your wife yet not at the same time.”

“Or maybe I just need a different woman to do it with.”

“You’re not fifteen. You’re over thirty. You should be able to tell the difference. Why don’t you figure out if it’s a need or if you’ve actually fallen for me?”

“I haven’t fallen for you. I just need a woman or my wife, and I can’t decide which.”

“But you said you love me.”

“I do love you, but I haven’t fallen in love with you yet. There’s a difference. I want to get to know you for you first. You don’t have to completely conform to who my wife was. You don’t have to copy her all the time. People can change, and so can you.”

“You’re so wise and so clever, honey. It’s why you don’t listen to know-it-alls who’ve read just one book or dated one person. What would they know? I can see you’re in a dilemma and need time to think it through and mull it over. Take all the time you need. I’ll still be here when you’re done subtracting.”

“And if I still don’t have an answer?”

“I’ll still be here.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He turns away from you and curls up, as if trying not to look at you and hide his face from you out of embarrassment, trying to shrink away from the awkwardness of what he just admitted.

You adjust again, this time curling up beside him and wrapping your arms around him from behind and resting your head on his back. You wait for him to turn over to face you. Could be minutes. Could be over an hour. Once he does, you kiss him. He kisses you back and wraps his leg around your waist. You move your hands to his shoulders and his neck to pull him closer to you. Once he’s close enough for your liking, your arms are wrapped around his back, your fingers pressing into his flesh there and feeling his muscles while your lips are locked in passionate kissing. You stop and pull away before anything more can happen. It’s not the right time or place to take your clothes off and make love. You don’t want to traumatize Ha-jin in case she wakes up in the night.

“Feel better?” You ask.

“Much better. Never mind. I was talking nonsense.”

“It didn’t seem like total nonsense to me. I guess today was one of those days you needed relief.”

“A little.”

“If you’re okay with it, we can do more when we’re home alone.”

“We can?”

“Of course. We’re both adults and married, aren’t we? So it’s okay to do…that…if we both want it.”

He removes his hands from underneath your clothing. “It’ll be a while then, I guess. I’m rather shy, you see.” He still holds your hand or touches your leg with his foot, as if scared you’ll disappear if he isn’t touching you in some way. “For now, let’s just get some sleep. It’s been such a long day and we’re both exhausted. We’ll need all the rest we can get to face tomorrow.” He gives you a goodnight kiss. “Goodnight, honey. I love you,” he murmurs as he closes his eyes to finally sleep.

You brush his hair back with your fingers when loose strands get in his eyes. “Goodnight, honey. I love you too,” you murmur back before closing your eyes to join him in slumberland.

#gong yoo x reader #gong yoo x you #gong yoo #Han yunjae x reader #han yun-jae x reader #captain han x reader #the silent sea #the silent sea Netflix #the silent sea prompt #pls tag me if you’re inspired by this #i’d love to read it

14 notes · View notes