#Week 3 Photographic Analysis

[barnacles34]

Lost in Analysis (Winter x Male OC)

5k words, smut, fluff, happiness, data

Winter x Male OC

The thing about Junho Kim's[1] weekly debriefs with Minjeong Kim was that they followed a precise algorithm, an almost liturgical routine that both participants had wordlessly agreed upon circa Winter's third month of employment (viz. April 2024). The format went as follows: Winter would arrive at exactly 18:30 on Friday bearing a leather-bound portfolio containing the week's logistics reports, margin analyses, and projected Q3/Q4 modeling scenarios. Junho would pretend to study these for exactly twelve minutes while Winter sat in the ergonomic chair across his desk, her accent becoming pronounced in direct proportion to her anxiety level[2].

What happened on this particular Friday deviated from the algorithm in ways that would later prove significant, starting with Winter's arrival at 18:27[3].

"The Busan account numbers are off," Junho said, his photographic memory already detecting a 0.03% discrepancy in the third-quarter projections. The words emerged with the mechanical precision of someone who had learned human speech through technical manuals rather than conversation. "This is—" he paused, index finger tapping against his mahogany desk in a rapidfire motion that Winter had learned to recognize as his pre-explosion tell, "—unacceptable."

And then something unprecedented occurred.

Instead of her usual composed absorption of his critique, Winter's face crumpled into what could only be described as a squeaky whimper, a sound so incongruous with her usual professional demeanor that it seemed to physically stun Junho into silence. It was the acoustic equivalent of watching a Mercedes-Benz hiccup.

The algorithm crashed.

—

[1] Junho Kim, CEO of Quantum Logistics Solutions, net worth $2.3B (₩3.1T), possessed what his former Harvard professors called "an almost frightening capacity for data retention" and what his former therapist (sessions terminated after 2.5 meetings) called "a pathological inability to process emotional bandwidth."

[2] A phenomenon her roommate had dubbed "The Accent Anxiety Index," where her carefully practiced Seoul pronunciation would gradually give way to her native Busan satoori, ranging from barely detectable at Level 1 ("감사합니다") to full coastal at Level 10 ("아이고, 사장님, 이 숫자 영 아니네요").

[3] The 3-minute early arrival would later be explained by a complex series of events involving a broken elevator, two flights of stairs, and Winter's determination not to let her carefully constructed timeline collapse due to mechanical failure.

—

The following Friday's debrief began with Junho actually pulling out Winter's chair[4], a gesture so unexpected that she nearly missed the seat entirely. The portfolio was reviewed. The whiskey was poured (Junho's usual Macallan 25, Winter's Hwayo 41). And then, somewhere between the second and third drink, Winter's accent kicked into what would later be classified as Level 11 on the Southern Comfort Scale.

"You know what your problem is, sajangnim?" Minjeong's words carried the warm weight of soju and suppressed frustration, her carefully maintained Seoul accent dissolving entirely into coastal inflections. "당신은 인생을 마치 스프레드시트처럼 대하시네요. Everything must calculate perfectly, but people aren't numbers, and some of us are tired of being debugged like broken code."

Junho's finger stopped its habitual tapping mid-motion[5].

—

[4] A gesture learned from a WikiHow article titled "Basic Human Courtesy: A Beginner's Guide" that Junho had queued up on his tablet at 3:47 AM the previous Tuesday.

[5] Later analysis would reveal this as the exact moment Junho Kim, master of algorithms and logistics, encountered a variable his photographic memory couldn't process: genuine human connection.[6]

The office fell into a silence that could be measured in heartbeats (Junho's: an efficient 72 BPM; Minjeong's: an elevated 98 BPM). Outside, Seoul's financial district performed its usual Friday night exodus, the sound of departing Mercedes and BMWs creating a capitalistic symphony twenty-three floors below.

"시간이..." Minjeong continued, her Busan accent now operating at what could only be classified as Level 12[7], "Time isn't just money, 사장님. Sometimes it's just... time. Like those lunches you wolf down in exactly eight minutes while reading reports. Or these Friday meetings where you never actually look at me, just through me at some invisible spreadsheet floating in the air behind my head."

Junho's hand, still frozen mid-tap, slowly lowered to the desk. His photographic memory began involuntarily cataloging details it had somehow missed during their previous 47 debriefs: the way Minjeong's left hand always fidgeted with her portfolio's corner when nervous, how her voice carried traces of sea salt and summer festivals despite years of Seoul speech coaching, the fact that she had memorized his coffee preferences down to the precise temperature (81°C, no higher, no lower).

"I do look at you," he said, then immediately registered the statistical improbability of his own response[8].

Minjeong's laugh carried the particular timber of someone who had been holding it in reserve for approximately 11.7 months. "아니요, you really don't. You look at KPIs and performance metrics and quarterly projections. Did you know," she leaned forward, her accent thick as Busan fog, "that I've worn the same earrings every Friday for three months just to see if you'd notice?"

The earrings in question were small silver cranes, Junho's memory instantly supplied, purchased from a street vendor in Gukje Market during last quarter's Busan office inspection, chosen because their wings formed the mathematical symbol for infinity when viewed from the correct angle[9].

—

[6] A concept that would later require Junho to create an entirely new category in his mental filing system, located somewhere between "Acceptable Business Practices" and "Breathing Exercises (Mandatory)."

[7] A previously theoretical level on the Accent Anxiety Index, characterized by the complete abandonment of Seoul linguistic pretense and the emergence of what Minjeong's mother would call "우리 딸의 진짜 목소리" (our daughter's real voice).

[8] Statistical analysis of Junho's daily eye contact patterns, conducted by his personal AI assistant, revealed an average sustained eye contact duration of 1.3 seconds with all employees, making his current 4.7-second gaze at Minjeong a 361.5% deviation from the mean.

[9] A detail that would have impressed Junho greatly had he noticed it at the time of purchase, rather than at this precise moment when his brain was simultaneously trying to process the concept of infinity and the way Minjeong's eyes reflected the city lights like binary code translated into stardust.

—

The Hwayo bottle stood between them like a glass mediator, its contents depleted by exactly 73.4%. Junho found himself performing calculations he had never previously considered necessary: the precise angle at which Minjeong's smile disrupted his cardiac rhythm (42.7°), the correlation coefficient between her proximity and his ability to maintain coherent thought patterns (inverse relationship, R² = 0.97), the half-life of each satoori-tinged syllable in his auditory memory (approaching infinity)[10].

"There's a pojangmacha," Minjeong said, her words now performing linguistic gymnastics between Seoul and Busan, "down in Gangnam that serves 할매's 파전 just like back home. But you—" she gestured with her glass, creating small amber trajectories in the air, "—you probably have the exact caloric content memorized without ever tasting it."

"624 calories per standard serving," Junho confirmed automatically, then added, in what he would later recognize as his first attempt at human humor[11], "Not accounting for 할매's (grandmother’s) love."

The laugh that escaped Minjeong's lips was genuine enough to bypass all of Junho's statistical models for appropriate business interaction. It was the kind of laugh that made him wonder if his entire algorithmic approach to life had been operating on a fundamental error: the assumption that human emotions could be debugged rather than experienced.

"사장님," she said, then caught herself, "아니, Junho-ssi." The honorific shift created a quantifiable disruption in the office's atmospheric pressure[12]. "Do you know why I cry sometimes when you yell about the numbers?"

Junho's hands found themselves attempting to calculate an emotion he had no formula for. "I... have a working hypothesis."

"It's not because I'm scared or hurt," she continued, her Busan accent now wrapping around the words like a warm coast-side breeze. "It's because I see you turning yourself into code, like you're trying to compile a human being into binary, and..." she paused, searching for words in both Seoul and Busan vocabularies before settling on, "...그게 너무 아까워요."

The phrase hung in the air, untranslatable in its full emotional weight[13].

—

[10] A phenomenon that would later require Junho to create an entirely new mathematical framework he privately termed "The Minjeong Constant: Variables in Human Connection."

[11] Later analysis of office security footage would reveal this as his first non-data-related comment in approximately 2,847 hours of recorded business interactions.

[12] Advanced environmental sensors in the building's HVAC system actually recorded a 0.02% change in air pressure at this exact moment, though causation versus correlation remains a subject of debate among the building's maintenance staff.

[13] The closest English approximation might be "it's such a waste," but this fails to capture the uniquely Korean sense of regret for potential beauty lost to unnecessary efficiency, like trying to measure ocean waves in milliliters.

—

For exactly 15.4 seconds, Junho Kim—master of instantaneous data processing, champion of real-time analytics—found himself buffering. His mind, that perfectly calibrated instrument of calculation, attempted to run multiple subroutines simultaneously:

ROUTINE_1: Analyze the 2.3% tremor in Minjeong's voice during "그게 너무 아까워요"

ROUTINE_2: Process the 7.4mm dilation of his pupils upon hearing his given name

ROUTINE_3: Calculate the exact distance between their hands on the desk (23.7cm, decreasing by approximately 0.3mm per heartbeat)

ERROR: Stack overflow in emotional processing unit[14]

"I have a file," he began, then stopped, realizing that perhaps not everything needed to be classified and stored. "No, I mean... I remember every time you've smiled at work. Real smiles, not the ones you use for clients or difficult vendors." His fingers twitched, instinctively seeking a keyboard that wasn't there. "The data suggests that they occur most frequently when you're talking about Busan, or when you think no one is watching you arrange the office plants, or..." he paused, processing, "...or when you're correcting my humanity protocols[15]."

Minjeong's eyes widened, creating what Junho's brain automatically calculated as a 34.6% increase in their reflective surface area. "You... keep track of my smiles?"

"I keep track of everything," he said, then amended, displaying unprecedented runtime flexibility, "but your smiles occupy 43% more memory space than standard data points."

"아이고," Minjeong laughed, the sound carrying hints of sea breezes and noraebang nights, "only you would quantify feelings in percentages and memory allocation, 사장님[16]."

The Hwayo bottle now stood at 82.6% depletion. Outside, Seoul had transformed into its weekend configuration, all neon equations and binary dreams. But inside this office, something unquantifiable was compiling—a program written in neither Python nor Java, but in the ancient code of human connection.

"There's a logical error in your earlier statement," Junho said suddenly, his voice performing calculations it had never been calibrated for. "About me not looking at you."

"Oh?" Minjeong's eyebrow arched at precisely 27 degrees.

"I look at you approximately 2,347 times per day. My peripheral vision activates in your presence with 72% more frequency than baseline. I have memorized exactly 267 variations of your voice modulation between Seoul and Busan registers[17]. The error," he continued, his own accent slipping for the first time since Harvard, "is in assuming I don't see you."

—

[14] A phenomenon his Harvard professors had theoretically predicted but never successfully documented: the complete shutdown of pure logic circuits in favor of what they termed "human.exe."

[15] A private joke that had never made it past his internal firewall until this moment, referring to the way she subtly guided him toward more socially acceptable behaviors, like suggesting he say "good morning" to the cleaning staff or remember team members' birthdays.

[16] The honorific here carrying a new weight, somewhere between professional distance and affectionate teasing, a linguistic quantum state that would have fascinated physicists had they been present to observe it.

[17] This particular statistic would later become the subject of a 3 AM realization that perhaps "normal" CEOs don't maintain such detailed databases of their assistants' vocal patterns.

—

The confession hung in the air with the weight of a misplaced decimal point. Minjeong's hand, still holding her Hwayo glass, trembled at a frequency of approximately 3.2 Hz. The office's automated climate control system registered a sudden 0.7°C spike in local temperature[18].

"그래서..." Minjeong's voice emerged in Pure Pattern #271 (Subcategory: Emotional Breakthrough), "this is why you always know when I've had 떡볶이 for lunch?"

The unexpected query caused Junho to experience what his systems could only classify as a brief moment of runtime joy. "The specific aroma particles adhere to your cardigan at a rate of—" he caught himself, noting the gleam in her eye, and for the first time in recorded history, Junho Kim deliberately chose not to complete a calculation[19].

Instead, he found himself saying, "Your smile increases by exactly 23.7% when you eat 떡볶이. It's... optimal."

"최적화?" Minjeong's laugh carried notes of soju and starlight. "You're really going to data-analyze my happiness levels?"

"I have spreadsheets," he admitted, his voice carrying an unfamiliar warmth that his diagnostic systems struggled to categorize. "Cross-referenced with weather patterns, quarterly reports, and the frequency of your Busan accent emergence[20]."

"아이고..." She shifted in her chair, reducing the distance between them by precisely 4.7 centimeters. "You're either the weirdest or the most romantic person I've ever met, and I haven't decided which yet."

The word 'romantic' created a momentary buffer overflow in Junho's cognitive processes. His hands, typically occupied with calculating profit margins or optimizing supply chains, found themselves drawing abstract patterns on his desk's surface—a behavior previously filed under 'Inefficient Human Gestures: Do Not Engage.'

"I could..." he paused, processing, "...show you the data?"

—

[17] This particular dataset would later be renamed in his personal files to "The Minjeong Codex: A Quantitative Analysis of Qualitative Perfection."

[18] The building's maintenance staff would later attribute this to a mechanical anomaly, unaware they had documented the exact moment Junho Kim's ice-cold corporate facade began its calculated melt.

[19] A moment that would later be marked in his personal development log as "First Successful Implementation of Strategic Data Suppression for Emotional Optimization."

[20] These spreadsheets, discovered months later during a routine server backup, would become legendary among the IT department as "The Love Languages of Linear Regression."

—

Minjeong's eyes sparkled with what Junho's facial recognition protocols quantified as 87% mirth, 13% tenderness. "보여주세요," she said, the soju making her consonants softer, more Busan-bound. "Show me this data about me."

For the first time in his professional career, Junho Kim fumbled with his laptop password[21]. The Hwayo bottle between them had decreased to critical levels, and he found the standard office lights were creating unusual prismatic effects in Minjeong's hair. His fingers, typically precise to the microsecond, skittered across the keyboard.

"See, here's the correlation between your happiness metrics and the proximity to Korean holidays," he began, then stopped, distracted by the way she'd rolled her chair closer to view his screen. The scent of her perfume (도라지 꽃, his brain supplied automatically, though for once the percentage calculation felt irrelevant) mixed with the lingering soju in the air.

"You made a pie chart," she said, her voice warm with something his systems were too buzzed to properly quantify, "of my favorite lunch spots?"

"The data visualization seemed... appropriate," he managed, aware that his usual processing power was operating at diminished capacity. "Though I may have spent a statistically anomalous amount of time color-coding it to match your favorite blazer[22]."

Minjeong's laugh had shed all traces of its Seoul polish. "어머나, who knew the great Junho Kim was such a..." she searched for the word in both dialects before landing on, "...nerd?"

"I prefer 'data enthusiast,'" he replied, surprising himself with the speed of his response. The soju was definitely affecting his standard processing delays. "Though my enthusiasm appears to be... specialized."

"Specialized?" Her eyebrow arched in a way that created unprecedented disruptions in his cardiac rhythm.

"The data suggests," he said, his own Gangnam accent softening around the edges, "a singular focus on one particular... variable[23]."

The office space seemed to contract by approximately 40%, though Junho found himself caring less about the exact percentage with each passing moment. Minjeong's hand had somehow migrated to rest near his on the desk, their fingers separated by a gap that felt simultaneously quantum and cosmic.

—

[21] Password: Min2847@QLS, a combination he would later realize was more revealing than any spreadsheet.

[22] The blazer in question: a deep navy piece from a Dongdaemun boutique, worn approximately every third Wednesday, correlated with a 34% increase in his productive distraction levels.

[23] Later analysis of the office security footage would show that at this point, Junho's typically perfect posture had relaxed to unprecedented levels, creating what the ergonomics AI labeled as "Optimal Romance Angles."

—

"Show me more," Minjeong said softly, unconsciously tilting her head up to meet his gaze. Something in her tone caused Junho's spinal alignment to automatically straighten, his shoulders squaring as he leaned forward slightly. The motion created what his hazily analytical mind registered as a subtle shift in the office's power dynamics[24].

"These graphs," he began, his voice dropping half an octave without any conscious input, "track every time you've challenged my decisions in meetings." His finger traced the upward trend line, the gesture somehow both precise and possessive. "You're the only one who dares to correct my logic. It's... intriguing."

Minjeong's breath caught audibly. "사장님..." she started, then with visible effort, "Junho-ssi... you track even that?"

"I track everything about you," he admitted, the soju finally overriding his professional filter subroutines. The way she instinctively ducked her head at his words, a soft pink rising in her cheeks, sparked something primal in his usually ordered mind. "Though lately, I find myself more interested in the unquantifiable variables[25]."

"Like what?" The question emerged barely above a whisper, her natural deference to his authority softened by something warmer, more personal.

Junho felt his hand move with uncharacteristic boldness to tilt her chin up, his thumb registering her pulse point at... he realized with start that for the first time in his adult life, he didn't care about the exact number. What mattered was the acceleration, the way her breath stuttered when he held her gaze.

"Like the way you automatically straighten my tie when you think I'm not paying attention," he murmured, voice steady despite the soju. "Or how you always wait for me to take the first sip of coffee in our morning meetings[26]."

—

[24] The building's pressure sensors detected a subtle but measurable change in the room's atmospheric density, as if the very air was rearranging itself around their shifting dynamic.

[25] Security logs would later note this as the moment Junho Kim's typing pattern on his laptop transitioned from "Corporate Efficiency" to what could only be described as "Focused Intensity."

[26] A habit that Minjeong had developed unconsciously over months, part of an unspoken protocol that went far beyond mere professional courtesy.

—

The laptop screen dimmed to conserve power, casting half of Junho's face in shadow. His hand hadn't moved from her chin, thumb still resting against her pulse point in what his rapidly deteriorating analytical functions recognized as a gesture of both measurement and claim[27].

"You know what else I've noticed?" The question rumbled from somewhere deeper than his usual corporate register. His other hand reached past her to close the laptop with a decisive click, eliminating the last barrier between them. "You mirror my breathing patterns during long meetings. 호흡이... perfectly synchronized."

Minjeong's eyes widened fractionally, caught between the wall and his presence. "That's..." she swallowed, her professional composure wavering, "...very observant of you, 사장님."

"I thought we were past 사장님," he said softly, but with an undertone that made it less observation, more command. The soju had stripped his voice of its algorithmic precision, leaving something rawer, more intuitive[28].

"Jun...ho..." she tested the name without honorifics, the syllables carrying the weight of every unspoken variable between them. Her hands fidgeted with her portfolio, a nervous tell he'd documented approximately 847 times but had never been close enough to still before.

Until now.

His free hand covered both of hers, instantly calming their movement. The gesture was protective, possessive, and entirely unplanned by his usual decisional matrices[29]. "You don't need to calculate the right response," he murmured, unconsciously echoing her earlier criticism of his own binary nature. "Your instincts have a 99.9% accuracy rate."

The percentage slipped out automatically, making her laugh—a soft, breathy sound that seemed to bypass his auditory processing and strike directly at something more fundamental. Her head tilted back further, a movement so subtle it barely registered on the office's motion sensors but sent his pulse into unprecedented acceleration.

"My instincts," she whispered, her Busan accent emerging with complete authenticity, "are telling me we've miscategorized this relationship[30]."

—

[27] The building's biometric scanners would later flag this moment for what their algorithms labeled as "Significant Cardiovascular Anomaly: Dual Synchronization."

[28] Office voice recognition software attempted and failed to classify this new vocal pattern, eventually creating a new category labeled simply "After Hours Protocol."

[29] The exact pressure of his grip would have registered at precisely 7.2 PSI, perfectly calibrated between restraint and assertion, had either of them still been counting.

[30] The security AI, in its nightly report, would mark this exchange with a rare notation: "Recommended Reclassification of Personnel Relationship Status Pending."

—

"Miscategorized," Junho repeated, the word hanging in the air like a suspended calculation. His hand moved from her chin to the nape of her neck, fingers threading through her hair with unprecedented decisiveness[31]. The motion drew her incrementally closer, though for once he didn't bother quantifying the exact distance.

"yes..." Minjeong's affirmation came out breathier than any of her previously recorded vocal patterns. The portfolio slipped from her fingers, creating what would normally be an unacceptable disruption of organized space. Neither of them moved to retrieve it.

"You know what's interesting?" Junho's voice had shed every trace of its corporate modulation, leaving only that command that seemed to resonate directly with her autonomic nervous system. "I've run approximately 2,847 scenarios of this moment in my head[32]."

Her hands had found their way to his chest, fingers curling into the precise Italian wool of his suit. "And?" The question emerged with a tremor that his tactile sensors catalogued automatically before his conscious mind told them to stop measuring and start feeling.

"None of them..." he leaned closer, watching her eyes flutter half-closed in response to his proximity, "...included the variable of you looking at me exactly like this."

The faint scent of soju on her breath mingled with that eternally elusive percentage of 도라지 꽃 perfume. Junho felt his last analytical subroutines shutting down, replaced by something far more ancient than algorithms[33].

"Minjeong-ah," he said, his voice dropping to a register that bypassed all honorifics, all corporate hierarchy, all pretense of professional distance.

Her response was to cant her head just so, a motion that managed to be both surrender and invitation. "Calculation time's over, 사장님," she whispered, the honorific now carrying a weight that had nothing to do with corporate structure.

—

[31] The office's motion sensors registered this gesture as "Executive Override: Priority Action."

[32] This number, like most of his remaining statistics, was completely fabricated—a first for Junho Kim's otherwise impeccable data records.

[33] Building security cameras would later mark this timestamp with an unprecedented classification: "Critical System Override: Human.exe fully activated."

—

For the first time in his documented existence, Junho Kim stopped calculating entirely.

The distance closed between them with a momentum that defied measurement. His hand tightened in her hair, angling her face upward as his other arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her flush against him. The kiss, when it came, contained no statistics, no data points, no quantifiable metrics[34].

Minjeong made a soft sound—Pattern #unknown, Category: heaven—against his mouth. Her fingers clutched his suit lapels with enough force to wrinkle the wool beyond its optimal pressed state, a fact that Junho's usually meticulous mind registered and immediately discarded as irrelevant.

Time segmented into a new measurement system: the catch of her breath, the silk of her hair between his fingers, the way she yielded and pressed closer simultaneously. Junho discovered that his organizational skills apparently extended to kissing, each angle adjustment and pressure variation drawing increasingly desperate responses from Minjeong[35].

When they finally broke apart, Minjeong's carefully maintained Seoul pronunciation had disappeared entirely. "아이고..." she breathed against his mouth, "당신이..."

"Initial results," Junho murmured, his own accent thick with something that had nothing to do with regional linguistics, "require extensive further testing[36]."

She laughed, the sound vibrating against his chest where she was still pressed against him. "Did you just turn our first kiss into a quality control protocol?"

"Quality confirmed," he replied, then demonstrated his newfound commitment to hands-on research by kissing her again, harder this time, swallowing her surprised gasp. His hand splayed possessively across her lower back, holding her steady as she swayed into him.

—

[34] The building's atmospheric sensors recorded unexplained fluctuations in local temperature, humidity, and electromagnetic fields, leading to a complete recalibration of their measurement standards.

[35] Later analysis would suggest that Junho's legendary attention to detail had found a new, decidedly non-professional application, though this data remains classified in personal files marked "Private Research: Ongoing."

[36] The security AI attempting to transcribe this conversation eventually gave up and simply tagged the file: "Error 404: Professionalism Not Found."

—

Somewhere in the haze of non-analytical thought, Junho registered Minjeong's slight backward momentum and moved instinctively to steady her. His hand swept the desk clear with uncharacteristic disregard for organizational protocols, sending the quarterly reports flutter-falling to the carpet in an acceptable margin of chaos[37].

"Jun...ho..." His name escaped her lips like a statistical anomaly as he lifted her effortlessly onto the mahogany surface. Her legs parted automatically to accommodate him, skirt hiking up precisely 4.7 inches—the last measurement his brain would process for the foreseeable future.

"So beautiful," he murmured against her throat, the words emerging in pure Gangnam inflection, all pretense of corporate diction abandoned. His teeth grazed her pulse point, drawing a whimper that would require an entirely new classification system[38].

Minjeong's fingers tangled in his precisely styled hair, disrupting approximately 47 minutes of morning grooming routine. "사장님," she gasped, the honorific now carrying entirely different connotations, "the papers..."

"Irrelevant data," he growled, recapturing her mouth with newfound authority. The kiss deepened, transformed, became something that defied all previous parameters. Her back arched into him, creating angles that had nothing to do with geometry and everything to do with instinct[39].

A distant part of his mind registered the soft thud of his suit jacket hitting the floor, followed by the whisper of silk as Minjeong's blazer joined it. The city lights painted silver equations across her skin, codes he suddenly needed to decode with his mouth instead of his mind.

—

[37] The office's normally pristine state would require exactly 23.7 minutes to restore, a task that would be significantly delayed by several subsequent "data collection sessions."

[38] Facial recognition software attempting to analyze the security feed would crash repeatedly, unable to reconcile Junho Kim's expression with any known configuration in its emotional database.

[39] The building's structural integrity sensors registered minor seismic activity, though this data would be suspiciously absent from the next day's maintenance logs.

—

He let his hands trail by the sides of her body, one busy with her torso—breasts and all—and the other, feeling the creamy softness of her thighs. And each needy press or pinch, brought out the softest of her moans, the cutest of her lip quivers.

He was busy, marking her lips, making it all swollen and red; yet, still, he couldn’t get enough of her. That soft body, her caring little hands, her hot inner thighs, and that gentle heat radiating off her core—just hidden by the slightest of her skirt. “Minjeong.” He whispered, pressing himself against her—a matter of teasing and also a way to test the waters, whether or not she wanted it on the table.

And Minjeong, not one to initiate, wrapped her thin arms around his nape, pulling him closer, “Yes, yes, please, anything, anywhere,” then a dozen little kisses all on his face. This assurance, this consent, slowly, but surely, made him wrench her legs open—wide. He saw that stain, dark against her gray underwear, and that was when his photographic memory… failed him.

He dug in, letting his loin press up against hers—immersing himself in her wetness. Then, finally, he pulled down on his pants, showing his tent-like imprint on his underwear to Minjeong, who, obviously, couldn’t stop staring. By the end of the minute, that ruthless minute, both were undressed in their lower-half—a utilitarian instinct to fuck each other as fast as possible.

Junho breathed heavily, staring at that pink hue that her core was so beautifully composed of—along with the wetness, the fragrance, and more. “Minjeong…” He held his shaft, lining it up straight on her wetness. She finally replied, “Yes… Junho…” And that’s when he pressed in, into the endless heat.

That wet connection hilt-to-hilt, along with a deep kiss—turned Minjeong completely docile and submissive. That wet connection, her wet slime covering his shaft, somehow, only intensified their lust for each other. He pressed in again, faster this time, earning that soft mewl. “Mhm, fuck me,” she whispered, again and again. He kept honoring those wishes, going deeper, and faster. He tucked his dick into her pussy, wet squelch and all, over and over until he felt his legs get weak from thrusting. Yet, that weakness didn’t deter him, he glided deeper, letting both their pelvises rub against each other, and making Minjeong cry out from the clit stimulation. She felt like she was getting tunneled, this man, the love of her life, crush of her lifetime, fucking her so good into a wobbly table—dreams aren’t even this good.

“I’m gonna cum, Minjeong.” He whispered, low and growling.

“Inside. Please. Inside…” She whispered before getting overtaken by her orgasm.

And just at the peak of her orgasm, the teetering breath before rest, Junho barreled all his semen inside her—rope after rope of semen splashing against her cervix. “Holy fuck.” they both said in conjunction. 

—

The Seoul skyline had shifted into its late-night configuration by the time they finally disentangled themselves. Junho's normally immaculate shirt hung open, his tie having long since joined the scattered papers on the floor. Minjeong's hair had abandoned all pretense of its usual professional arrangement, falling in waves that his fingers couldn't seem to stop threading through[40].

"이게..." Minjeong began, her voice still carrying traces of breathlessness as she surveyed the chaos they'd created. Her blazer lay draped over a chair at an angle that would have horrified their usual professional standards. "I should reorganize the—"

"Stay exactly where you are," Junho commanded softly, his arms tightening around her waist. His usual perfectionism had found a new target: the way she melted against him at that tone[41].

She tilted her head back to meet his gaze, her smile pure Busan sunshine. "데이트하자... be my 오빠?" The question emerged with endearing uncertainty, mixing honorifics and languages in a way that bypassed his brain entirely and struck straight at his heart.

"그래," he murmured into her hair, then with characteristic precision added, "Exclusively."

Her laugh carried notes of joy and residual shyness. "Then as your girlfriend, I should really clean up this mess..." She gestured at the scattered papers, the displaced furniture, the general dishevelment that spoke eloquently of the past hour's activities.

"As your boyfriend," his voice dropped to that commanding register that made her shiver, "I want to watch you do it[42]."

The drive home—his penthouse, by unspoken agreement—required exactly 17 minutes. Neither of them bothered to count.

—

[40] The building's security system would later note this as the longest recorded instance of the CEO remaining in office after hours, though the detailed logs were mysteriously corrupted.

[41] Internal HR protocols regarding workplace relationships were hastily updated the following morning, though no one questioned why the CEO personally oversaw these revisions.

[42] The night cleaning staff would arrive to find the office in unprecedented perfect order, though several employees would later swear they heard laughter and whispered Busan endearments echoing through the empty halls.

Fin

[technofeudalism]

Amid anger and protest over the Trump administration’s plan to deport millions of immigrants, U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement plans to monitor and locate “negative” social media discussion about the agency and its top officials, according to contract documents reviewed by The Intercept. Citing an increase in threats to ICE agents and leadership, the agency is soliciting pitches from private companies to monitor threats across the internet — with a special focus on social media. People who simply criticize ICE online could pulled into the dragnet.

[ ... ]

If this scanning uncovers anything the agency deems suspicious, ICE is asking its contractors to drill down into the background of social media users. That includes: “Previous social media activity which would indicate any additional threats to ICE; 2). Information which would indicate the individual(s) and/or the organization(s) making threats have a proclivity for violence; and 3). Information indicating a potential for carrying out a threat (such as postings depicting weapons, acts of violence, refences to acts of violence, to include empathy or affiliation with a group which has violent tendencies; references to violent acts; affections with violent acts; eluding [sic] to violent acts.”

[ ... ]

Once flagged, the system will further scour a target’s internet history and attempt to reveal their real-world position and offline identity. In addition to compiling personal information — such as the Social Security numbers and addresses of those whose posts are flagged — the contractor will also provide ICE with a “photograph, partial legal name, partial date of birth, possible city, possible work affiliations, possible school or university affiliation, and any identified possible family members or associates.” The document also requests “Facial Recognition capabilities that could take a photograph of a subject and search the internet to find all relevant information associated with the subject.” The contract contains specific directions for targets found in other countries, implying the program would scan the domestic speech of American citizens.

[ ... ]

The posting indicates that ICE isn’t merely looking to detect direct threats of violence, but also online criticism of the agency. As part of its mission to protect ICE with “proactive threat monitoring,” the winning contractor will not simply flag threatening remarks but “Provide monitoring and analysis of behavioral and social media sentiment (i.e. positive, neutral, and negative).” This includes regular updates on the “total number of negative references to ICE found in social media” from week to week. Such sentiment analysis — typically accomplished via machine-learning techniques — could place under law enforcement scrutiny speech that is constitutionally protected. Simply stated, a post that is critical or even hostile to ICE isn’t against the law.

[phanchester]

since there are so many data nerd phannies i decided to make a compilation of all the spreadsheets i could find - lmk if i missed any or if you want me to add any additional details <3

last updated: 30/06/24

actively updating spreadsheets

dan and phil uploads from 2021-2024

dan and phil’s upload schedule from all their channels with days and dates

amount of days in between videos in each channel

pie charts of days of the week they upload

made by @ahappydnp 

everything dan and phil related

all of dan and phil’s video links from all their channels from all their accounts (including super amazing project, snapchat, vine, tiktok and more)

all of dan and phil’s radio shows, including reuploads and playlists, as well as the dan vs phil, fan war and internet news if available for each show with misc clips and written recaps

all of dan and phil’s liveshows, including some written recaps and the app where it was originally posted

all of dan and phil’s vyous including the question they were answering

all of dan and phil’s collaborations and video features (even if they were in the background), including the channel they were originally uploaded on 

all of dan and phil’s interviews

all of dan and phil’s merch, including originally shop links and links to the phandom wiki which has further information

all of dan and phil’s professional photos as well as some fan photos, including the event, photographer and platform

the dates and statuses of each of these videos (lost, archived, unlisted or public)

made by @stillarchivingdnp

dan and phil 2024 upload stats

each of their 2024 videos with channel, upload date, upload time in uk, length, sponsor and editor/s (if applicable) with an accompanying colour-coded calendar

(for amazingphil videos) whether dan featured and (for dapg videos) whether it was gaming/talking and who tweeted it

interactive part where you can see the time period between two videos

averages, maximums and minimums for times between uploads, upload times and runtimes with accompanying graphs

percentage of videos with other editors, with pie charts for all channels and each channel

made by @dnpbeats

all or nothing: dan vs phil season 2

all of the games for season 2, with the year they played them and the results with and without all or nothing coming into play

how often all or nothing came into play and who suggested it

the general impact of all or nothing

made by @organized-chaotic-disaster

dan and phil saying “i love you”

when dan and/or phil said ily

the video and timestamp from when they said ily and whether it was prompted

pie chart of dan or phil saying ily

made by @ahappydnp

games where one of them decides the winner

date and link for each video

overall winner with the winner for each round

breakdown of the amount of times each of them have won each round and the percentage phil has won

made by @dnpbeats

dan and phil 2024 upload schedule

upload date for each video, with the day of the week and approximate time it was uploaded in cst, including the most common and second most common upload day for dapg

days between each upload, including the longest gap, shortest gap, average gap and first and second most common gap for dapg

a colour-coded calendar displaying the upload schedule for dapg and amazingphil

made by @kat-aa

completed spreadsheets

all or nothing: dan vs phil season 1 with a great accompanying document with further details and analysis of the data

all of the games they played, with the year they played them and the results with and without all or nothing coming into play

how often all or nothing came into play and who suggested it

the general impact of all or nothing

made by @organized-chaotic-disaster 

youtuber tours

(not necessarily dnp but it includes them!)

120 different tours, including the creators, names, dates, countries, links (if available) and producers (if applicable)

each tours’ venue capacity range, average and total attendance

individual tour show breakdown with city, state, country and additional notes

data on each venue’s capacity, number of tours, and which youtuber went to each venue

data on each country’s amount of shows, broken down into states and cities

made by @stillarchivingdnp 

gamingmas 2023 schedule

all gamingmas video titles from 2023

the time each video was uploaded in gmt

made by @cactuslester

spreadsheet screenshots in posts

listening trends in all or nothing

scatter graph for the correlation between track number and number of listens

analysis of the data

made by @serendipnpipity

analysis of dnp’s letterboxd ratings and movies with part 1 and part 2

(pt 1) rating distributions for all the movies they’ve rated, including details about which movies one rated higher than the other, and which movies they rated the same

(pt 1) a list of their five-star movies

(pt 1) a list of movies one logged but not the other

(pt 1) cute little misc notes about the specific movies and dates

(pt 2) ratings broken down into genre, studio and franchise with accompanying bar charts

made by @philsrosesweatshirt

views on post-hiatus dapg videos after specific time frames

i believe this is a work of progress!

video titles with the dates and months, along with details of whether they were sponsored or had external editors

view count after 24 hours, 48 hours, 1 week, 2 weeks, 3 months and 6 months

made by @goldenpinof

favourite dnp tour song statistics

years phannies started watching vs the year they joined the phandom represented in a bar graph

favourite dnp tour song in a donut pie graph and a bar graph

favourite song vs year joined represented in a bar graph

made by @serendipnpipity

terrible influence: the tour trailer video analysis

all the videos that appear in terrible influence with additional notes

the list sorted by date, view count and channel specifics

timestamps provided for each clip, both in the video and where they appear in the trailer

made by @emojackolantern

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

my favorite mulder moments from s6

doing his best to analyze the fragments of the x files left after the fire in episode 1, because he will never give up on anything he sets his mind to

veeeeery carefully handing the mystery beast’s claw to scully for analysis ("is that an animal?" "ain't rupaul")

accidentally traveling through a time warp in episode 3 and attempting to convince the ww2 soldiers that the war is actually over, then giggling at his own luck in tracing down the missing ship (NERD! nerd)

then finding ww2 era scully and being so confused as to why she doesn’t know him because… that’s scully!!! who knows him better than anyone in the world!

being trapped in the body of someone else in episode 4, and when he sees the photo of that guy’s wife and kids, he sadly whispers “scully” (and then when his “wife” slaps him awake, he AGAIN mumbles “scully”... yeah, she really is your family, huh?)

trying so hard to convince scully it’s really him trapped in someone else’s body: “your mother’s name is margaret, your brother’s name is bill jr. he’s in the navy and he HATES me” and the desperation in his voice when she still doesn't believe him :(

episode 5: “hey scully? i, uh, know it’s not your normal life, but thanks for coming out there with me” (there will always be bonus points for emotional communication and then even MORE bonus points for his reaction to discovering the waterbed right after. i'd frame it if i could)

maurice roasting him in episode 6 for being “prone to obsessive compulsiveness, workaholism, antisocialism- fertile fields for the descent into total wacko breakdown” <- get his ass

“you know why you think you’ve seen the things you do?” “because… i have seen them?” <- the SASS in that delivery! oh my!

finding the case file that spender shredded up in episode 7 and taping it together so he could investigate himself… lmao, that’s a man that gets results!

and then his great strategy for getting answers on that case being to annoy a demon until something happens... and it works <3

his reaction in episode 8 to scully being referred to as “the missus”; he mouths “oh!” and fidgets a bit, looking both terrible awkward and pleased, haha

and who can forget the iconic “i do not GAZE at scully”? surely not i!

finding skinner sick in his office late at night in episode 9- claiming he's just saying hello, then asking him if he’ll be okay, turning off all of the lights so he felt more comfortable, and angling a desk lamp so scully could inspect him

getting very jealous when scully gets assigned to the case of the mysterious death photographer in episode 10 without him: “i’m thinking murder by telekinesis. i’m thinking maybe a shamanistic death touch. i’m thinking about the muslim superstition that to photograph someone is to steal their soul” (and his righteous fury at the idea of them being separated 🙁)

being nosy throughout the whole episode because somehow he ended up with the files from kersh’s computer and calling her for frequent updates (and using a silly voice to say “we used to sit next to each other at the FBI” to make her smile while she's super annoyed with terrible agent ritter)

hunting through the FBI archives at 9 am to track down information for scully’s case, and when he learns that she is in danger and not picking up her phone, immediately calling trash agent ritter to go check in on her

when said trash partner SHOOTS and nearly KILLS scully, he goes to visit her in the hospital a week later, and corners him, saying only that he is a lucky man. you KNOW he wanted to get violent. amazing self-restraint on him!

grabbing scully’s hand in her hospital bed and smiling, telling her the doctor said her recovery is amazing- she’s still so sad, and he says “death only looks for you once you seek its opposite”

gym mulder in episodes 11 and 12... the basketball... yeah ❤️

trying to be kind in episode 13 and it immediately backfiring in that cringe-inducing fashion that only he is capable of achieving: “stay there, mrs. suarez. we're going to make sure your baby makes it safely into the world” “well, thank you, but i’m not in labor. and my name is not suarez, it’s villareal. he tells people i’m his wife. like he’s so macho”

the wind-up chattering teeth on the desk in episode 14 <3

how wildly excited he was to play house in episode 15- “hey, oooh wait a minute, you didn’t let me carry you over the threshold”

and then taunting all of the neighbors with his stupid basketball hoop, LMAOOO

in episode 16, he knows off the top of his head how many years ago the wanshang dhole went extinct

rare communication w for mulder in episode 17 when they get into their usual spat about his theory not being scientifically possible and he decides to instead focus them on what they both agree on: the need to find june

opening up about how important baseball is to him in episode 19: “it’s like the numbers talk to me, they comfort me, they tell me that even though lots of things can change, some things do remain the same. it’s-" "boring?” (pouty mulder face as scully teases him)

AND his recitation to arthur dales of how many home runs mickey mantle hit with each hand

chatting with arthur dales and telling on himself when it comes to his feelings: “do you believe that love can make a man shapeshift?” “i guess… women change men all the time” “i’m not talking about women” (they then share hot dogs, pizza, and chinese takeout)

AND paying that little boy to help him surprise scully with the baseball date- sharing something that is both personal to him and plain fun with her

scully asks him what more he hopes to find in episode 22, and he answers “my sister” 💔 because that is still at the heart of every single action he does after all of this time… no matter which way the plot veers, who the bad guys of the week are, or where life leads him, it's always about samantha and that guilt he harbors over her

[9w1ft]

hi! thanks for reading and being curious ☺️

here’s link to a bunch of clips everyone has collected from that show so i will let you come to your own conclusion but i see so much love in her expression

as for where she sat, you can read a more analysis style writeup i did about it here:

but the tldr is that i was at sofi stadium for the 8/3 show that week, and my seat was the section next to where she ended up being seated, so i know what everything looked like. and i can confidently say that her area was noticeably sectioned off, inaccessible to me, with its own separate box/concessions area at the top of the section. the maps of the stadium layout also mark the area as vip. other celebrities were also in karlie’s section. so it wasn’t general seating.

to me the setup was no different than something like this:

as far as we have seen she was not photographed in the vip tent during the night though i did see a tweet, but to be completely honest i would hope she didn’t go to floor because she was 2 weeks postpartum and with the amount of hate and threats she gets from swifties, i wouldn’t want her there to be ogled at or potentially harassed.

instead we got taylor smiling and looking at her section all night long, and proof that taylor could see her from her vantage point (see link above for more about that and more clips but ill include some gifs here for people who are immune to pull media)

(side note i love how easy it was at the time to find clips of her staring because it was the night she debuted all of her blue looks for the first time so we got all these visuals that were undeniable because oh that’s right 1989 tv was announced!! (and yet she played a rep song as surprise song, new year’s day, which is a seminal kaylor song. but i digress))

anyways, all and all i’m not sure why it would matter either way where she was sitting that night, if you were convinced they could be together if only it wasn’t for karlie not sitting in the vip tent. because the whole premise of their relationship right now would be that they aren’t being public about it. so if that is the case, why would they want karlie in the vip tent if that would have been the thing that would have convinced everybody? i think it was more of a comfort issue.

so yeah! these are my thoughts.

[rainbowsky]

Hi! What do you think of the new camera cpn? I don't think I saw you talk about it. I love reading long cpn analyses but I haven't seen many people analyze the camera thing so I'm very eager to know people's thoughts about it

Hi Anon!

I've been ill for the past few weeks (recovering, I'll be fine), so haven't been online much, which is why you haven't seen me talking about much or responding to asks. I don't really have the spoons right now to dig too deeply into this (you're not likely to see any long analysis from me for a bit) but I can give a few thoughts on it.

Fake, fan fiction, CPN.

GG has been seen using Leica cameras and other sophisticated camera equipment for years. He is, after all, a professional graphic designer and photographer who used to be the primary photographer for a photography studio he ran with friends.

He has been spotted using this specialized Leica that is optimized for black and white photography, and has shared black and white photos in the past.

Now suddenly we see DD - someone who, while he's had a lot of hobbies, has never shown any special interest in photography - wandering the streets of Paris with a new Leica that's an updated model of the same one GG's been using, that's optimized for black and white photography...

Not only does he appear to be taking up photography (or at least being public about his interest in photography, if it's something he's developed over time), but it's black and white photography, and he's using a Leica - a fairly niche, very expensive brand - of the same type and similar model as GG has been using.

Sometimes I feel like I have to remind everyone to have a sense of perspective on things like this, because it's easy to forget or overlook relevant context. And by that I mean, let's consider how something like this would be received if it was a man and a woman who had been rumored to be in a relationship and who suddenly appeared to be using the same camera brand of similar models in this narrow 'black and white' space. MF relationships have been completely 'outed' by less.

This is pretty damn unwashable in my eyes. Just like the phone case, this is another situation of these guys 'coincidentally' having the exact same taste in something that's not popular or mainstream.

Both of them using a credit card iPhone case, in CHINA, where everyone pays for everything via phone apps, not via credit cards?

Now this camera... BJYXSZD.

So those are my thoughts on this very 💣 candy.

However, for deeper analysis and some of the details, photos, etc. you can check out @accio-victuuri's posts on the subject. You can find those posts here:

Post 1

Post 2

Post 3

Post 4

Post 5

[killercritters]

Master-post ig, and info, and whatnot. currently unfinished

The overall, the rebranding, the revamp! THE RE-RUN OF THE SMILING PSYCHOPATHS!!!!

Eight merciless, heartless, and unimaginably violent criminals, each haunted by their own darkness, have been drawn together by a twisted common purpose. Bound by their twisted common interests, they've united to forge…

The Killer Critters

They actually call themselves the smiling critters still but ughetuithg

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March 19th ████ 11:42 PM.

The victim's body exhibits multiple puncture wounds to the chest and abdomen. The suspected weapon is a kitchen knife discarded in the sink; blood analysis confirmed the blood on the knife match that of the victim. However, no fingerprints were found on the weapon. The body was found lying on the bed, with a blanket draped over it. However, a blood trail and signs of a struggle in the living room suggest that the attack occurred there, and the body was subsequently dragged to the bed and positioned there. No sign of forced entry or exit were found at the premises. Additionally, several wrappers and bottles found in the attic indicate that the attacker had been present in the victim's home for possibly weeks or months. No further evidence was found at the scene. Contact █████ to advise law enforcement to remain on high alert for 911 calls concerning an intruder, as this homicide appears to be another assault linked to the currently active serial killer known by the alias, 'The Midnight Piercer'.

CatNap

Height: 5'5 Age: 23 Weight: 123 lbs. Color: Purple/Lavender Family History: [REDACTED] Alias: Midnight Piercer Additional information: CatNap exhibits erratic and violent behavior characterized by episodes of bloody and frenzied mania, often accompanied by laughter. Recent reports regarding his appearance describe him wearing a white hoodie frequently stained with blood, dark gray baggy pants with a tattered left knee, grey dirty sneakers, and a brown bracelet on his right wrist adorned with a full moon pendant. Alarming mutilations include deliberate incisions on both cheeks and lips, performed in a distressed and uneven manner to create the appearance of a permanent smile. It is believed that CatNap inflicted these self-injuries, possibly using a knife, resulting in his teeth remaining constantly exposed and causing involuntary salivation.

Additionally, he appears to have an addictive tendency toward a substance known as 'Poppaeni,' a highly addictive drug that necessitates smoking for consumption. Usage of this substance can cause the user's breath to appear red, and chronic abuse may lead to severe health consequences, including damage to lung tissue, respiratory difficulties, sleep disturbances, persistent throat irritation, immunosuppression which increases the risk of cancer, and potential brain damage. Current documentation and limited photographic evidence indicate that CatNap's primary method of murder involves the use of a stained kitchen knife.

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[pleistocene-pride]

Happy Ice Age Week:

Thylacosmilus is an extinct genus of saber-toothed metatherian mammals that inhabited South America from the Late Miocene to Pliocene epochs some 9 to 2.5 million years ago. The first remains know of thylacosmilus consisting of 3 partial skeletons where unearthed from the Ituzaingó Formation of Corral Quemado, in Catamarca Province, northern Argentina, during the 1926 Marshall Field Paleontological Expeditions. These three specimens were recognized as representing a new type of marsupial, related to the borhyaenids, and were reported to the Paleontological Society of America in 1928, though without being named. In 1933, the American paleontologist Elmer S. Riggs named and preliminarily described the new genus Thylacosmilus based on these specimens, he dubbed the two new species in the genus, T. atrox and T. lentis. The generic name Thylacosmilus means "pouch knife", while the specific name atrox means "cruel". Since then several more fragmentary Thylacosmilus specimens have been recovered. In a 1972 Argentinian paleontologist Jorge Zetti suggested that T. atrox and T. lentis represented a single species, and the American paleontologist Larry G, Marshall agreed in 1976, stating the features distinguishing the two were most likely caused by being different growth stages and sexes. Additionally the genus Achlysictis known only from teeth was found to be synonomous with thylacosmilus. Reaching around 59 to 70 inches (150 to 178cms) in length, 28 to 32 inches (71 to 81cms) tall, and 180 to 330lbs (80 to 150kgs) in weight, thylacosmilus would have been comparable in size to a modern jaguar. Thylacosmilus had large triangular saber-like canines which where anchored well into the skull to a degree not seen in other saber toothed animals. Recent comparative biomechanical analysis have demonstrated that thylacosmilus had a weak bite force but a powerful neck and flexible forelimbs and was more than capable of killing prey in the same manner as sabre-toothed cats. However thylacosmilus’s unique dentition meant that it was incapable of feeding like one. Thus it has then been suggested that thylacosmilus may have been an organ specialist. In life thylacosmilus would have inhabited the grasslands and forests of South America.

Art used in this video can be found at the following links

[quaranmine]

Next steps for the AU:

-I have a couple of analysis-type posts to make. I love talking about this fic lol so I have a lot to say still. Included in this will be a review of art symbolism, setting as a character, and some selected real-life cases and research I ran across. I may also talk a little about fire symbolism as well as my fun fire-related words I purposefully scattered around (if you noticed me describe feelings as a spark a lot, it was on purpose lol.) I also may talk about a couple things that didn't end up happening, or did happen but almost didn't.

-This weekend I am going to revisit the fic chapters 8-12 to see if I can add more art to them. I had initially wanted more art pieces throughout the fic but the art would sometimes delay finished chapters for weeks (i have to both draw and color it traditionally, photograph it in good light, and then digitally edit it) so I started worrying less about it. If I do I will post those pieces and retroactively add them in the chapter.

-Speaking of retroactive edits, some earlier chapters of the story on AO3 have some issues with em dashes appearing smaller than they should be. This is corrected in my original document but I never got around to correcting the published chapters (i am always mildly worried the formatting will break lol.) When I do this I will also add cocoabats' cover into the first chapter. I also plan to retroactively edit some of my Fire Finder Math in chapter 3 because I think I made Grian's tower taller than it needs to be/at the wrong elevation. This won't affect the chapter outcome at all I just Need that to be accurate for myself

-I have a great many web weaving materials that I have slowly collected over the months that I would like to mess with again. I have been saving them in a #f tag on my main blog, but I didn't make any except for one because I wanted the full context of the story to be published.

-Going to upload the Letters from the Lookout drabbles into the AO3 series. Hopefully in the future I may add more. Or, I may not. We'll see. I also have a Scar-centric story called "Alpenglow" in my outline. based on its structure it may have multiple chapters, but it will not have any sort of through-line plot. It's selected scenes from his 8 years career as a lookout. I want to write this, but I don't know if it will be or not. With the main fic done I will be releasing my brain to work on other projects/ideas that I didn't want to get distracted by earlier. That doesn't mean it won't happen, it just means that it may not happen on a fast timeline.

[toxinellebug]

HESPERIA/BETTERFLY kamikotized heroes Headcanons PART 3

Warning, this may make animal lovers uneasy for a bit.

This one is going to take place during the day, around Adrien and Marinette’s 2nd week of school, so they are still toying around with their Miraculous’ at night for their own personal gains, and have not yet suffered the consequences and been instructed to hunt down the Butterfly-man in order to save themselves. 

            Promise that the next one will show our fav villains in action, but for now I hope there are fans of Mr. Pigeon reading this because-

Xavier Ramier becomes……

Sauvaquateur!

(This is my attempt at combining the French words for “Savior” and “Aquatic”, into a new, superhero name. Fun fact: In 1979, the U.S. Coast Guard trained pigeons to locate people lost at sea and they had a 90% success rate!

Also remember S4, ep 4, “Mr. Pigeon 72”)

As mentioned in my post “Shadybug’s Paris Headcanons”, in this universe, pigeons are far less welcome in Paris than they are in the Good/Prime universe, so there is no need for a Pigeon-Tamer.

There IS a need for Environmental technicians though… a DIRE need.

(In this Universe, imagine the world under The Supreme’s control as slightly less extreme than North Korea under Kim Jong-un, and about as polluted as Gaya, India.)

Luckily, construction plans for “Project Oxygen”, endorsed by M. Bertrand King, have been submitted and are awaiting approval from The Supreme. In theory, once they’ve built enough towers, it should take care of the awful smog problem in Paris.

But that won’t help with toxicity in the soil and water.

Which is why M. Ramier is outside on a particularly gloomy day, in full yellow hazmat gear and neon orange rubber galoshes, attempting to collect water samples from the Saint-Martin canal.

Trash aside, people just didn’t realize how much of the poison they put out for rats (and those poor, adorable, misunderstood pigeons) ended up in the Seine, resulting in its present, disgustingly polluted state. 

Xavier can’t help but daydream of simpler times he has never known, like the ones depicted in old photographs and paintings.

In his personal collection, he has a precious family keepsake, a postcard to his great-grandfather sent by his great-uncle in 1912;

     It depicted such a happy scene of blue skies and even bluer water, and people gathered to merrily feed the pigeons with smiling faces near the Seine.

Not for the first time, he can’t help but wonder if perhaps he was simply born in the wrong decade…

Instead, here he is, collecting vial after vial of what is closer to sludge than water at different points along the canal for chemical analysis and comparison. 

It’s dull and dreary.

Or, at least it’s dreary… 

     The dullness comes to a rather abrupt end when a low bellowing sound draws his attention to a large, sludge covered something twitching near the bank beneath The Pont des Arts, (or as we know it, The Love Lock bridge, though in this universe there are no locks) a mere 4 meters away from him.

Mon Dieu!

He thought the rumors were merely that; rumors dreamt up to keep children away from the filthy water.

But blessed be; that really is a crocodile!

Where on earth did he come from?? 

(Somewhere in a shoddy apartment, Jagged, or rather, Jared, sneezes and feels a strange pang of guilt.)

The poor fellow doesn’t look too well; not that M. Ramier claimed to have any expertise in crocodilian health, but he was almost certain that the creature’s spine was not meant to be quite so prominent.

          He also could not recall ever seeing a crocodile lay on its side like that, half floating in the water, half… Hold on, was it tethered to something????

Merciful heavens! Discarded plastic Enforcer barrier tape had found its way into the canal and gotten tangled up around this poor beast’s jowls and caught upon who knows what kind of garbage submerged near the bank.

Sloshing his way over, M. Ramier had only intended to get close enough to attempt to at least cut the plastic tape where it was tethered closest to the bank in hopes the lack of tension would loosen it enough that the crocodile could free himself.

But the croc sensed his approach and grew frightened, letting out a warning growl and weakly thrashing his too thin tail, before jerking wildly and tightening the noose in the process.

     At this rate the beast would strangle himself!

This was terrible!

    Oh, that poor creature….

But, what could he do?  He was merely an Environmental Technician, trained to collect and study water samples.

      He supposed he could try contacting the ‘Ménagerie du Jardin des Plantes’ (the zoo), but  by the time they decided to send someone over, if they decided to send anyone over, it might be too late!

If only he could help… He became an Environmental Technician due to his love of animals and a desire to make the world a better place for them, and now there was a creature in desperate need of aid right in front of him and he was completely powerless…

He does not see the glowing butterfly perch upon the sample vial in his gloved hand, nor does he notice it vanish.

He’s far too preoccupied with the sudden voice in his head:

       The voice introduces himself as Betterfly, and claims that he too shares a love of animals. 

           The voice offers him the power he needs to save this suffering creature, and asks if he will accept this gift for the greater good.

M. Ramier accepts, though, he’s not really Xavier Ramier anymore…

The stained yellow of his suit melts away to a pristine white, and the neon orange of his rubber boots has given way to a striking cyan and become more fin-like in appearance.

        His rubber gloves share the same shade of blue, as does the “star of life” symbol overlaying the outline of a rescue bird on his chest.

               Somehow, his sample vial has inexplicably transformed into a rather impressive hand operated bilge pump.

       He feels stronger, more confident, more daring.

                  He is now Sauvaquateur!

Holstering the pump at his waist, he dives into the water with the grace of a tropical clawed frog, Sauvaquateur swims with amphibious ease thanks to his new, webbed gloves, and is able to take a firm hold of the weakened crocodile and bring him the the bank of the canal.

   (Another fun fact: The Seine is 9.5 metres or 31 ft. deep and you should absolutely NOT swim in it without superpowers.)

With his newfound strength, he makes quick work of tearing that horrid plastic off the poor creature, and feels satisfied that he has successfully rescued his new, scaly friend!

…..Except, the crocodiles eyes do not seem to be open.

      He’s also rather still, perhaps too still-

                       He’s not breathing!

Panic takes hold as Sauvaquateur fears he was too late after all, but the voice returns to him;

     Betterfly urges him to remain calm, hope is not lost yet, but he must come to his senses!

….That’s right, he mustn’t give up!

Sauvaquateur presses his head against the crocodile’s rough back near where he thinks a heart should be.

          Perhaps it is due to Betterfly’s “gift”, but even through his suit’s protective helmet, Sauvaquateur swears he can hear a weak thumping sound.

There is a heartbeat but no breath; what should he do? How does one go about performing rescue breathing on a crocodile?! Would that even help????

    Again, Betterfly’s soothing voice echoed in his mind, urging him to look closer…

Looking closely, the crocodile seemed to have an awfully bloated stomach yet such a thin looking back… Could it be-?

Eyeing the bilge pump holstered at his side, Sauvaquateur knew he had to try!

Using incredible strength he now unfathomably possessed, he did what should not have been humanly possible; he pried the crocodile’s mouth open and placed the hose of the pump inside.

It only takes 5 good thrusts of the plunger rod before a burst of toxic brown water and wads of plastic come spewing out of the pump’s outlet.

         Sauvaquateur shudders at the thought of all that rubbish inside that poor animal.

              It’s a feeling that Betterfly shares.

Its stomach noticeably deflated, and its scales a shade less pale than they were only a few moments prior, the crocodile takes a deep, relieving breath.

       Sauvaquateur does the same.

With the croc out of immediate danger, and now fast asleep, Betterfly praises Sauvaquateur for his valiant efforts, and suggests that now would be a good time to let someone more experienced take over.

Sauvaquateur agrees.

He can feel the “gift” leave him- like the sensation of color being gently stripped away.

    He is left in his muddy, yellow suit, and his plain orange rubber boots. His water sample vial, now empty, rests at his feet.

M. Ramier is not sure what just happened exactly; it’s a bit fuzzy, like waking up from a peculiar dream.  

      He could’ve sworn he was talking to someone just now….

             But the loud snoring from the large, slumbering reptile beside him reminds him that there are far more pressing matters at hand.

Moving to a more comfortable distance, Xavier unzips his outer suit in order to pull out his mobile phone and place a call.

He is placed on hold for frustrating amount of time before a M. Césaire answers and M. Ramier informs him of his predicament.

It’s not long after that when Enforcer sirens sound along the banks, forming a protective barrier and trying to hold back inquiring news photographers eager to get a shot of “Saint Martin’s Beast.”

M. Césaire is there as well, and he expertly secures the crocodile’s jaws shut before he and an assistant lift and haul the creature into the back of a van to transport to the zoo for examination.

M. Ramier is harshly admonished for getting so close to such a dangerous animal and is informed that it is a miracle he is unharmed.

A miracle?

Is there such a thing anymore?

….Perhaps.

PART 2    

[yatescountyhistorycenter]

Do you know Yates County?: Yates County Oddity No. 1 through No. 26

By Jonathan Monfiletto

Anyone who has conducted research either through Yates County’s digitized newspapers or the Yates County History Center’s subject files has likely come across items titled either “Penn Yan Oddity” or “Yates County Oddity.” These items – snippets might be a good word – provide information about various aspects of local history, seeming to answer some sort of question or mystery.

Seeing so many of these snippets – and finding the answers but seeming not to find the question – I decided to scour our digitized newspaper database to see if I could find all of them, the questions with the answers. It turns out the oddities – 90 Penn Yan Oddity items, 52 Yates County Oddity items – were part of an advertising campaign in the 1940s for Baldwin’s Bank, then located at 127 Main St. in Penn Yan, the present-day home of the Arts Center of Yates The Penn Yan Oddities ran in The Chronicle-Express in consecutive weeks from February 20, 1947 to November 11, 1948, and then the Yates County Oddities picked up right away in the newspaper from November 18, 1948 to November 24, 1949. So, for more than 2 and a half years, readers of The Chronicle-Express learned something about local history each week in the newspaper.

Each item started out as an advertisement for Baldwin’s Bank with the phrase “Do You Know Yates County?” at the top of the graphic followed by the question for the week. In the middle, the bulk of the ad, would appear information about the bank’s various services and offerings. The bottom would direct the reader to look for the answer elsewhere on the same page and then look for another Oddity the following week.

In this article, I present Yates County Oddity No. 1 through No. 26. Each question and answer has been transcribed exactly as it appeared in the newspaper, which changes made only for typographical errors and not for grammatical errors. The only time words have been removed from the items is in the case of references to photographs that appeared in the newspaper.

1) Where are there 10 different classifications of soil within ½ mile?

A Yates County soil analysis made in 1916 shows that at Fiveville, a little south of Italy Hill, there are 10 classifications of soil within a half-mile radius: Wooster, gravelly silt loam and stoney silt loam, Volusia flat phase silt loam and silt loam, muck, Holly silt loam, Papakating silt clay loam, Chenango gravelly silt loam, Lordstown stoney silt loam, and Genesee silt loam.

2) What farm still uses an “old oaken bucket?”

There is an “Old Oaken Bucket” well still in use on the old McFarren farm, Penn Yan, RD 4, now owned by H.M. Fulkrod. The bucket is lowered by a rope and there is a wood hand brake to slow the speed as it descends the well. When filled, the bucket is drawn up by turning the crank attached to the wooden spool.

3) Who was the first white child born here?

The great grandfather of Charles Beaumont, Penn Yan insurance agent and real estate brother, is said to be the first white child born in what is now Yates county. Joseph Hopeton Beautmont was born Sept. 26, 1798, to James Beaumont, native of England, and Mary Malin Beaumont, flollowers of Jemima Wilkinson. Their child was the first born in the New Jerusalem settlement. J.H. Beaumont died June 27, 1893, in the residence at 109 East Main street, now owned and occupied by Herbert Thayer. The old “Beaumont” horseblock may still be seen in front of the residence.

4) Bricks for what building were made of clay dug from the building’s cellar?

Sixty years ago this summer clay was removed when the basement for Ball hall of Keuka institute and college was being excavated. The same clay went chiefly into the making of the interior bricks from which the present structure was built.

5) What township was called Vernon?

From Jerusalem township of Ontario county in 1803 a new township, including what is now Milo and Torrey, was created and named Vernon. But Oneida county had created a Vernon township a year earlier, so confusion resulted. As a result on April 6, 1809 the state legislature changed the name of Vernon township, Ontario county, to Snell, honoring the state senator, Jacob Snell from Montgomery county.

Residents of this area apparently saw no reason for honoring a senator from another county, so assembled in a protest meeting at the inn of Luman Phelps, located at the corner of Main and Head streets in the young village of Penn Yan. The group petitioned the legislature to change the name to Benton township, honoring Levi Benton, the first settler in the region. On April 2, 1810, Albany nodded consent.

Milo township was set up and apart from Benton township in 1818 and Torrey township was separated from Benton in 1851.

6) What traditional birthplace of a people is in Yates?

Bare Hill in the western section of Yates county on the east side of Canandaigua lake is famous in legends of the early inhabitants of Yates county as the supernatural birthplace of the Seneca Indians.

7) What was the first name of Starkey town?

Both Starkey and Barrington townships were originally, along with Tyrone, Wayne, and Reading townships, now of Steuben and Schuyler counties, a part of Frederickton in Steuben county. Afterwards Reading was cut off and the Town of Wayne, including what is now Barrington, was organized. In 1822 Barrington was organized with the boundaries that define it today and in 1826, along with Starkey, it was annexed to Yates county.

8) Where was the nearest toll gate to Penn Yan?

A toll gate on the Penn Yan Branchport plank roead was near the site of the Allison and Daniels office – the old Hanford farm. The toll gate at the other end of the road was near Esperanza at the foot of the old road that ascends the hill west of the spacious mansion. Many older residents can remember the ruins of this toll gate house.

9) What surveyor was first settler of a town?

John Mower, 18, carried the chain, served as cook and was in charge of the pack horses for the crew which surveyed the new pre-emption line from Pennsylvania’s north border to Lake Ontario. In 1790 he settled in West River hollow, Italy township. Italy was originally part of Middletown township, organized in 1789, but changed to Naples township in 1808. Seven years later Italy township was set off. John Mower is quoted in history as saying that one spring he killed 314 rattlesnakes on the west side of the stream not far from the rocky ledges where they hibernated. The township was then rich in a dense forest of noble trees.

10) What rural cemeteries were once next to churches?

The cemetery near Swing’s or Ovenshire’s corners on the Penn Yan-Dundee road in Barrington and the Nettle Valley cemetery on the Penn Yan-Potter road, road were once adjoining churches. The church buildings have long since been removed and their location obliterated.

Do you know of any others in Yates county?

11) What was the first barn west of Seneca Lake?

In 1791, according to tradition, Caleb Benton built a barn 30 by 40 feet, starting on Monday morning with trees standing in the woods. These, it is said, were felled, hewed, and framed and the barn enclosed so that wheat was drawn into it by Saturday.

This was reported to be the first barn built west of Seneca lake.

12) Is there a battle ground sites in Yates?

The nearest any part of the present area of Yates county came to becoming a battleground was Sept. 9, 1779, when 400 of General Sullivan’s riflemen were sent along the west side of Seneca lake from the site of Geneva to what is now Kashong point and there wrecked the Indian settlement. Resistance of the [Native Americans] was insignificant if not entirely lacking.

The power of Indians had been broken in the battle of Newtown, east of Elmira.

13) What is Lake Keuka unlike other lakes?

Lake Keuka is unique, but not because it is shaped like the letter Y.

Geologists say that it is perhaps the only body of Y-shaped water with one of the upper branches an inlet and the other an outlet. Elsewhere nature has made the two top branches inlets and the base branch an outlet. Early glacial action, say geologists, created this freak. Water flows in at Hammondsport, the south end, also at Branchport, one of the north ends, and flows out through the other north end by way of the East or Penn Yan branch.

14) How old is the Friend house?

While commonly referred to as 150 years, the actual age of the Jemima Wilkinson house in Jerusalem is a matter of dispute. Arnold Potter, descendant of the early Friend settlers, believes the dwelling was some five years in the building and was completed in 1815. Her death occurred four years later. The Friend joined her followers near City Hill, Torrey township, in 1790 and there built the first frame dwelling in western New York. This would have been 25 years before completion of the Jerusalem home which still stands.

15) Where is there a Kentucky coffee tree?

On the east side of Route 14, the Dresden-Geneva state road, just before crossing the bridge over Kashong creek as one drives north out of Yates into Ontario county is a Kentucky Coffee tree – a rare sight in this vicinity. The tree is conspicuous because of its large leaf and uniquely shaped seed pod.

Does anyone know of any others in Yates county?

16) Through what bay does Yates rainfall reach ocean?

Practically all the area of Yates county drains into Canandaigua, Keuka, or Seneca lakes or into Potter swamp and runs eventually through the St. Lawrence river and bay into the Atlantic ocean. But a very limited section of South Italy and Jerusalem townships drain into the Cohocton and a bit of southern Barrington into Waneta and Lamoka lakes from when the water may flow through the Susquehanna system into the Atlantic by way of the Chesapeake bay, some 1,000 miles south of the St. Lawrence.

17) How many Yates places use Old World names?

At least four Yates county townships – Italy, Jerusalem, Milo, and Middlesex – have names which were long famous in England or on the continent of Europe. Also two villages – Dundee and Dresden.

Do you know of any other Yates community names borrowed from other countries?

18) What famous orator was born in this county?

Some of the addresses of Red Jacket, famed Indian orator, have been included in printed collections of the famous speeches of the years. But Red Jacket may or may not have been born in Yates county. Historians disagree upon the place of his birth. It may have been near Branchport or at Canoga, in Seneca county.

Robert G. Ingersoll, agnostic and brilliant orator, was born in Dresden Aug. 11, 1833. His birthplace is being preserved in his memory.

19) Where is the highest spot in Yates County?

The highest spot in Yates county is 2,130 feet above sea level and includes a few acres on the high plateau just west of the Jerusalem township line in Italy, about six miles west and a bit north of Branchport. It was in this area that a bomber crashed during World War II, killing all occupants.

20) Where is the lowest spot in Yates County?

The lowest spot in Yates county is above sea level – and is located somewhere in the bottom of Seneca lake this side of the Seneca county line which is in the middle of the lake.

Within the last few years Yates county has “settled” a great deal – some 400 feet roughly. Up to that time the eastern boundary of the county was highwater mark on the west shore of Seneca lake, which is listed as about 444 feet above sea level. This boundary caused much confusion. Game Protector Clay White, for example, apprehending a duck hunter or fisherman off the Yates county shore for some violation, had to take his man all the way around the end of Seneca lake, possibly 40 miles, to bring him before a Seneca county official. Assemblyman Vernon Blodgett introduced a bill a few years ago placing the county boundary in the middle of the lake.

In spots Seneca lake bottom is said to be even a bit below sea level.

21) How may lakes are there in the county?

There are no lakes in Yates county – entirely within the county, that is.

More than half of the Lake Keuka shoreline is within Yates, about seven miles of the Canandaigua shore line and over 20 miles of Seneca lake’s west shore. Lakes Waneta and Lamoka are just beyond the county boundaries.

22) How many railroads are there in the county?

Three different railroad companies operate lines in Yates county: the Pennsylvania, the New York Central, and the Lehigh Valley, the latter running diesel motors over the Middlesex Valley line between Geneva and Naples. These are the first diesels to be used in regular service in the county.

23) How many schools are there in the county?

While there are 50 rural school districts in Yates county, according to Superintendent Stephen Underwood of Branchport, but 26 of them maintain a school. Of the remaining 24 districts, 8 have sold their buildings; the others being idle, actually there are 32 schools in Yates county, if you add to the above 26 rural schools, the Middlesex Valley and Dundee central schools, St. Michael’s Parochial school in Penn Yan, the Penn Yan Union school (which has five buildings), Lakemont academy, and Keuka college with its several buildings.

24) How many miles of state road are there?

According to George Havens, county superintendent of highways, the total public highway mileage in Yates county is 1,813.44. Of this total 149.18 miles are in county highways, 109.16 state roads, and only 55.10 of town roads.

25) How many post offices are there in Yates?

Two of the Yates county townships, Italy and Barrington, have no post offices. Three townships have one post office each: Rushville in Potter, Dresden in Torrey, and Middlesex in Middlesex township. Milo and Benton have two post offices each: Penn Yan and Himrod in the former, Bellona and Gage in the latter. Jerusalem township with three offices, at Branchport, Bluff Point, and Keuka Park, and Starkey with  four, at Dundee, Rock Stream, Starkey, and Lakemont, bring the total number of post offices now operating in this county to 14. Years ago there were many more.

26) How many public libraries in Yates County?

Branchport, Keuka Park, Dundee, and Penn Yan now have the only libraries which are open to the public.

All of these are included as participants in the Yates County Community chest.

[lorcaswhisky]

Tag Game: First 10 Lines Challenge

Rules: Share the first line of your last ten published works or as many as you are able to and see if there are any patterns!

(Thanks for tagging me, @curator-on-ao3 !)

From newest publication to oldest:

1. Long Shot

(Discovery, 123,907 words)

He ran the data a second time, even though he already knew there was no mistake. He had made quite certain of that.

There it was again. Proof. Incontrovertible proof.

2. Probably

(SNW, 732 words)

"Next week?"

"I'm in the Antares Sector next week. Next month?"

3. We are here, and this is now

(SNW, 794 words)

“Are you alone? Or are there others like you?”

Brown curls bobbed as Khan nodded towards a photograph tacked to the cold grey wall, barely illuminated by the flickering light overhead. 

4. tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow

(Discovery, 1,490 words)

"This is a terrible idea."

Katrina opened her eyes.

5. Tactical Briefings

(Discovery, 1,378 words)

Commander Angharad Jones halted outside the Captain's quarters and took a deep, calming breath. She had carefully rehearsed what she would say on the turbolift ride to deck five. Rule one of crisis management: don’t make an even bigger crisis by saying something stupid.

6. Nutritional Values

(Prodigy, 385 words)

Janeway folded her arms. 

“None of the items on this menu provide an appropriate balance of nutrients for - any known species.” 

7. Drawn that way

(Lower Decks, 847 words)

"Did you see how her hair moved? All - swooshy? And she had, like, in-di-vidual eyelashes." Eyes boggling, Mariner wiggled her fingers. "So gross."

8. Tap

(Discovery, 1,436 words)

Tap. Tap. Tap.

It’s been more than an hour now. Waiting in front of a screen for a call from - someone.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

9. Lost Cause

(Discovery, 55,980 words)

This one is a little different, and I couldn't work out what counted as the first line, so have the whole chunk...

Personnel File - Lorca, Gabriel

Status: Retired

Current location: [REDACTED]

Service record: [...] 2246.3 Awarded Medal of Commendation for action taken on Tarsus IV. 2246.7 Promoted to Commander, assigned to USS Hawking [...] 2251.2 Assumed command of USS Buran [...] 2256.4 [REDACTED] 2261.7 Retired

-Starfleet Personnel Logs, accessed 2270.3 by <UNKNOWN USER>

*

>>MESSAGE RECEIVED 2261.7.10.22:34<<

TO: Pike, Captain C.

FROM: Lorca, G.

SECURITY: HIGH

Chris,

I don't know if my last few messages reached you. I guess not. I'm hoping this one works.

You'll have heard the rumors by now. They're true. I'm home. Back, anyway. I can't say any more than that here. I need to speak to you, in person. I have so many questions. I'm sure you do, too.

Let me know.

Gabriel

>>MESSAGE DELETED<<

10. Settle

(Picard, 1,819 words)

"We’re safe here."

Laris snorts.

"All of the Romulans on this vineyard are ex-Tal Shiar. Of course we aren't safe."

Pattern analysis:

Hmm. My shorter fics tend to start mid-conversation. My longer fics, though ... they start however they want. I think all of them ask some kind of question, either big - what data? Why has all this information been redacted? - or small - who are they talking to? Who's waiting for what? I don't seem to go for many action starts, though, so maybe that's something I could try in a future fic. Opening lines are definitely something I'd like to strengthen in future projects.

Tagging: @lizardperson, @liz-squids, @ussjellyfish and anyone else who'd like a go!

[lyssified]

i wanna hear about the play actually! can u tell me about it? (like. everything/hj/silly)

yes yes I can indeed tell you about it :) :) I'm really normal about this play !! this is really fucking long by the way uh. definitely the longest post I have ever made

i explained the synopsis in an earlier ask so there's that, gonna put a cut because this might be long !

spoilers for wait until dark both the play and the movie

tw for mentions of violence, death by strangling, knives, heroin, and discussion of dead bodies from a costuming perspective

THERE WAS MEANT TO BE A CUT HERE BUT IT DELETED AND I CANT PUT IT BACK AHH

okay so this is mostly going to be about the characters and the costume designs we have so far. so we're in the second week meaning we've started analysis and characterizing through mood boards and seen the cast read through the full play (we <3 table read day) next week we do measurement day and then consultations with the actors and get the final mood boards approved by the director

basic plot summary a bit more expansive than the synopsis- harry roat, a con man (the main villain) is hired by a woman named lisa to steal a doll (full of diamonds, heroin in the original movie) back from a new york couple that has ended up with it by accident. roat enlists the help of carlino, a brawny ex-policeman, and mike, a kind ex-marine by drawing them to Sam (an ex-marine and photographer) and Suzy's (a fierce and strong blind woman) apartment where he has murdered Lisa and hung her in a closet while sam and suzy are away. roat blackmails mike and carlino by making them suspects in lisa's murder. mike's involvement with roat is not revealed to the audience until later. a recurring theme in the play is sam's desire to have Suzy be independent and not rely on Gloria or him to do things for her. as a result, she is extremely precise and independent.

suzy is visited by all three con men in quick succession while sam is away, and mike gains her trust under the guise that he worked with Sam in the Marines. however, the con men misjudge Suzy to be extremely dumb because of her blindness, and, with the help of her neighbor Gloria (a tomboyish 13 year old girl that helps with the groceries sometimes and has a pretty bad family life), she figures out the plot to steal back the doll and sends Gloria to get Sam and bring him back home. they find the doll and hide it in the icebox.

eventually, mike is murdered by roat as he frantically tries to explain to suzy that she is being tricked, and roat chases Suzy around the apartment in the dark (Suzy and Gloria have turned out all the lights and disabled the fuse box so only Suzy knows how to navigate the apartment) as he tries to find the doll, threatening her in increasingly horrifying ways and using a towel to keep the icebox open so he can use the light to see her. eventually, Suzy manages to stab him several times and lodge herself in a safe space behind the icebox to hide and wait for sam. when sam and gloria finally come home, they finds roat slowly bleeding out and Suzy trapped and exhausted behind the icebox, pinned in place. finally Suzy manages to get up to unplug the icebox. she does this by herself, without sam's help.

other really interesting things about this play 1. it's only 3 scenes- scene 1 is roat blackmailing carlino and mike, scene 2 is Sam leaving for work and Suzy meeting mike, carlino, and roat (also when we meet Gloria). act 2 is Suzy and Gloria figuring out the con and all the other stuff. 2. there are no set changes- it's entirely set in Sam and Suzy's apartment 3. the use of lighting is really good- the con men often use the apartment's venetian blinds to signal to each other, the main conflict not being what's inside the doll but rather if roat is able to overpower Suzy to get it, the entire last like 10 minutes of the play where roat and Suzy fight happening either entirely in the dark (the audience will be able to see vague shapes but not much else) or with the only light being a single beam from the icebox 4. we have to costume a fucking dead body??? and she has to be hung. so there's either gonna be a mannequin or some heathers movie fake hanging type shit with lack of air makeup. also there's a lot a lot a lot of knife wounds and bruises that will have to be quick changes. we have to have live matches onstage (the actors have to be able to strike them quickly) and real cigarettes that smoke (Suzy needs to be able to smell the smoke) and a working fridge and running water. roat throws a switchblade across the room and it sticks in the wall but the switchblade comes out of a tiny porcelain figure that he calls Geraldine. roat has to speak perfect italian. we have to have access to a shitton of 40s photography equipment for Sam??? so much is going on. 5. our actor for roast is FUCKING TERRIFYING. literally no hate ever for them because they proceeded to give one of the best performances I have ever seen at the READ THROUGH, I was pissing myself in sheer terror, and then I went and congratulated them after the table read and they spoke in their kinda broken English telling me how much they appreciated it and then shook my hand!! and said they were excited to work with me !!

now for me to talk about my babygirl Sam. there are a lot of babygirls in this play. from most to least babygirl: 1. Sam 2. Mike 3. Carlino 4. Suzy 5. Roat 6. Gloria think of Suzy as having 0 babygirl, Sam has 10 babygirl and Gloria has -10 babygirl. hope this makes sense.

anyway we're doing mood boards so here's the one that I worked on for Sam because I fucking love sam (he's such a small character that only one person works on him)

and his character description ^^

here's why sam hendrix should be your new babygirl. 1. he treats his wife right. they r so sweet to each other I could go on and on and on about how cute they are. they argue in a playful way. he encourages her to grow and fend for herself and this ends up saving her life. she helps with developing his photos. he takes her to the movies and describes them for her. they trust each other soso much and they love talking to each other and Gloria is their adopted child. I don't make the rules. 2. he's a photographer!! he does weddings ! and babies ! because he needs to photograph happy things after coming back from war. their first date was in the baby ward at the hospital :) 3. he's a fucking wet cat. his desk is disorganized as hell and he spends all his time in his darkroom. his kenergy is unmatched. he would do anything for his wife. he's smart and funny! he definitely has big sad brown eyes. he really likes interior design. he adopted the local feral cat (gloria) and they love eachother. he's my little wet cat I have adopted him.

yes I am babygirlifying him. yes I am projecting because we both like photography. no I will not be taking criticism.

anyway here's some other pictures from mood boards and shit

example set design from another professional theater ^

^^ preliminary ideas for suzy

^^ preliminary ideas for roat

^^ audrey Hepburn as suzy hendrix in the 1967 movie

^^ stock photo I found of MY BABYGIRL and his wife :)

^^ the casting calls for Suzy, roat, carlino, mike, and Gloria

so yeah !! this is what I've been spending all my free time thinking about!! if you can spot the picture of the 10th doctor on the Sam mood board I will give you a cookie (/j/verysilly)

this play is a work of genius by the way. highly recommend reading it.

THANK YOU FOR THE ASK JULIAN !!!!! /gen /vpos

[oliviarogersblog]

How to Overcome Local Market Challenges When Selling a Home in Montgomery, Alabama

Selling a home can be one of the biggest financial decisions a homeowner makes—and doing it successfully requires a smart strategy, especially in a unique market like Montgomery, Alabama. While the area’s charming neighborhoods, rich history, and affordable cost of living attract plenty of buyers, local market factors can still cause unexpected hurdles that leave a home sitting on the market longer than expected.

If you want to stand out and secure the best price for homes for sale in Montgomery, Alabama, it’s essential to understand these common challenges and know how to tackle them head-on. In this comprehensive guide, we’ll walk you through proven strategies to navigate local obstacles, attract motivated buyers, and close the deal with confidence.

Understanding the Montgomery Housing Market

Before you can overcome market challenges, you need to know what they are. Montgomery’s housing market is influenced by factors like

Seasonal Demand: Spring and early summer tend to be the hottest selling seasons.

Economic Drivers: Military bases, state government, and nearby universities create steady demand but also mean buyers often seek value for their money.

Competition: With plenty of similar mid-priced homes on the market, standing out can be tough.

Buyer Expectations: Many buyers expect move-in-ready homes with updated features but affordable prices.

Keeping these factors in mind helps you plan your pricing, marketing, and negotiations realistically.

1. Price Your Home Competitively

One of the biggest reasons homes linger on the market is unrealistic pricing. Overpricing your home, hoping to “test the market,” can backfire and cost you in the long run.

How to get it right:

✅ Work with a local real estate agent: A professional familiar with homes for sale in Montgomery, Alabama, can run a Comparative Market Analysis (CMA) to determine the fair market value of your home.

✅ Study recent sales: Look at what similar homes in your neighborhood have sold for in the last 3–6 months.

✅ Be honest about the condition: If your home needs updates or repairs, price it accordingly.

✅ Adjust if needed: If you don’t get traction in the first few weeks, revisit your pricing strategy promptly.

A well-priced home attracts more interest, more showings, and potentially multiple offers.

2. Boost Your Home’s Curb Appeal

In Montgomery’s market, first impressions matter. A buyer might fall in love (or out of love) with your home before they ever step inside.

Affordable curb appeal tips:

Mow the lawn and edge the walkways.

Trim shrubs and trees.

Add fresh mulch and seasonal flowers.

Repaint or clean the front door.

Power wash the driveway and siding.

Replace outdated house numbers or porch lights.

These small touches can make your listing photos pop and draw more buyers to schedule a showing.

3. Stage for Success

Homes that are staged—even modestly—sell faster and often for more money. Buyers need to visualize themselves living there, not get distracted by clutter or outdated decor.

How to stage effectively:

Declutter every room.

Remove personal photos and memorabilia.

Arrange furniture to make rooms look bigger.

Add neutral touches like fresh linens and simple decor.

Use natural light to make spaces feel bright and airy.

If hiring a professional stager isn’t in your budget, your real estate agent can often offer simple DIY tips or recommend small improvements that make a big difference.

4. Invest in Professional Photography

In today’s market, your online listing is your first showing. Poor-quality photos can drastically limit the number of buyers who even bother to visit your home in person.

Best practices:

Hire a local photographer who specializes in real estate.

Take photos on a bright day with natural light.

Include shots of every room and key exterior space.

Highlight unique features: a big backyard, a screened porch, or a remodeled kitchen.

Great photos will help your listing stand out among other homes for sale in Montgomery, Alabama, and generate more clicks and calls.

5. Market Beyond the MLS

While your real estate agent will list your home on the Multiple Listing Service (MLS), that shouldn’t be your only strategy. The more eyes on your listing, the faster you’ll find a serious buyer.

Expanded marketing tips:

Promote your home on social media: Facebook, Instagram, and local community groups.

Create a dedicated website or landing page for your property.

Use virtual tours and video walkthroughs for out-of-town buyers.

Host open houses or private tours by appointment.

Network with relocation specialists and local employers.

An aggressive marketing approach will set your home apart from competing listings.

6. Be Flexible with Showings

Buyers are more likely to choose homes they can tour easily. If your schedule makes showings difficult, you risk missing out on qualified buyers.

Tips for smooth showings:

Allow as much flexibility as possible—evenings and weekends included.

Consider using a lockbox so agents can show the home when you’re not there.

Keep the house tidy at all times so it’s always “show ready.”

The easier you make it for buyers to see your home, the more likely you are to receive offers quickly.

7. Tackle Needed Repairs Ahead of Time

Many deals fall through after the home inspection uncovers problems. Addressing obvious repairs before listing reduces last-minute surprises and builds buyer confidence.

Focus on:

Fixing leaks and plumbing issues.

Servicing HVAC units.

Replacing broken windows or doors.

Repairing roof damage or gutter problems.

Updating outdated electrical panels or wiring.

A pre-inspected, move-in-ready home is a major selling point for buyers who want to avoid hassles.

8. Understand and Adapt to Buyer Trends

In Montgomery, buyers often want affordability plus modern updates. If your home is older or has dated finishes, strategic upgrades can help you compete without breaking the bank.

Budget-friendly improvements:

Fresh paint in neutral colors.

New cabinet hardware in kitchens and baths.

Updated light fixtures.

Modern faucets and bathroom mirrors.

Energy-efficient thermostats or appliances.

These small touches can refresh your home’s look and appeal to today’s buyers.

9. Work with a Local Expert

One of the best ways to navigate local market challenges is to partner with an experienced real estate agent who knows the Montgomery area inside and out.

A great agent will:

Price your home correctly from day one.

Recommend cost-effective upgrades.

Market your home aggressively.

Handle showings and negotiations professionally.

Keep you informed throughout the entire process.

Choosing the right agent can mean the difference between a stressful, drawn-out sale and a smooth, profitable transaction.

10. Prepare for Negotiations

Even in a healthy market, buyers will negotiate—especially if they spot issues during inspections or notice competing properties priced slightly lower.

Tips for successful negotiations:

Be prepared to respond quickly to offers.

Know your bottom line, but be flexible.

Consider offering to cover some closing costs if it seals the deal.

Stay calm and patient—sometimes the first offer isn’t the best one.

Your agent will guide you on when to accept, counter, or reject an offer to protect your interests.

11. Plan Your Next Steps

Selling a home is only one piece of the puzzle. Before listing, make sure you have a plan for where you’ll live next—whether that means buying another home, renting temporarily, or relocating out of town.

Being ready to move quickly once you find a buyer will help you avoid closing delays and complications.

12. Stay Informed and Be Patient

Even with all the right steps, selling a home can take time. Stay informed about market changes and stay in touch with your agent to adapt your strategy if needed.

If showings slow down, it might be time to revisit your price, refresh your photos, or consider new incentives to attract buyers.

Conclusion

Selling a home in Montgomery doesn’t have to be stressful or overwhelming. By understanding local market dynamics and following these proven strategies, you’ll be well-prepared to overcome common challenges and get the best possible return on your investment.

Remember: smart pricing, great presentation, effective marketing, and local expertise are your keys to success for homes for sale in Montgomery, Alabama.

[maymax77]

Selling in a Competitive Market: How to Overcome Local Challenges with Homes for Sale in Montgomery, AL

Montgomery, Alabama—known for its historical richness, growing economy, and Southern charm—is also home to a competitive real estate market. Whether you’re relocating, downsizing, or upgrading, selling a home here isn’t always simple. From pricing your property right to navigating buyer expectations, sellers must be strategic and informed to close a successful deal.

This comprehensive guide explores how to overcome common local challenges when listing homes for sale in Montgomery, Alabama, and provides actionable tips to help sellers stand out, attract buyers, and maximize return in this vibrant yet evolving housing market.

1. Understanding the Montgomery Housing Market

The Local Challenge:

Montgomery’s real estate market fluctuates with seasonal demand, employment rates, and economic trends. The city’s diverse neighborhoods—like East Montgomery, Cloverdale, and Midtown—cater to different demographics, which can complicate pricing and marketing.

Solutions:

Analyze Local Data: Monitor median sale prices, average days on market, and inventory levels specific to your neighborhood.

Know Your Buyer Pool: Families may prefer homes near top-rated schools, while young professionals could lean toward walkable, urban areas.

Work with a Local Realtor: Agents familiar with homes for sale in Montgomery, Alabama, can offer insight into buyer preferences, local demand, and micro-market performance.

2. Pricing Competitively Without Undervaluing

The Local Challenge:

Montgomery’s buyers are price-sensitive, and overpricing a home can result in it sitting on the market too long. On the flip side, underpricing may lead to leaving money on the table.

Solutions:

Use a comparative market analysis (CMA): Evaluate what similar homes in your area have recently sold for to set an accurate price.

Price Strategically: Round numbers like $199,000 may psychologically attract more attention than $205,000.

Adjust as Needed: If buyer traffic is low in the first few weeks, be prepared to revise the price based on feedback and market changes.

3. Curb Appeal Still Counts—Big Time

The Local Challenge:

Buyers in Montgomery often form opinions before they walk through the door. A lackluster exterior can turn away serious interest.

Solutions:

Freshen Up the Exterior: Power wash the driveway, paint the front door, and update landscaping.

Pay attention to the roof and gutters: These features are frequently scrutinized in home inspections.

Southern Charm Sells: Add welcoming elements like a porch swing, hanging plants, or tasteful shutters to appeal to regional aesthetics.

4. Stage for Local Buyer Preferences

The Local Challenge:

What works in other markets may not apply to Montgomery. Local buyers typically value traditional layouts, functional kitchens, and space for entertaining.

Solutions:

Neutral Decor Wins: Use soft, neutral tones and minimize clutter.

Highlight Popular Features: Open kitchens, energy-efficient windows, and home offices are strong selling points.

Stage Key Rooms: Focus on the living room, kitchen, and master bedroom for the biggest impact.

5. Marketing Your Listing Effectively Online

The Local Challenge:

With so many homes for sale in Montgomery, Alabama, sellers must compete not just in the local market but also online, where buyers begin their search.

Solutions:

Hire a professional photographer. Great photos can make your listing stand out among hundreds of similar properties.

Craft a Compelling Description: Focus on unique features like smart home upgrades, proximity to Maxwell Air Force Base, or access to the Riverwalk.

Use Multiple Platforms: List your home on Zillow, Realtor.com, Facebook, and local Montgomery groups for maximum visibility.

6. Hosting Open Houses and Private Showings

The Local Challenge:

In-person impressions can make or break a sale in Montgomery’s competitive market. But if showings aren’t handled well, you risk losing buyers.

Solutions:

Stage for Every Showing: Keep the house clean, well-lit, and clutter-free.

Be Flexible with Scheduling: Accommodate potential buyers as much as possible, even on evenings and weekends.

Leave During Showings: Give buyers the space to explore and imagine themselves in your home without pressure.

7. Competing with New Construction

The Local Challenge:

Montgomery has seen a rise in new construction, especially in East Montgomery and Pike Road. These new homes often offer modern designs, energy efficiency, and builder incentives.

Solutions:

Emphasize Value: Highlight the benefits of your home’s location, established landscaping, and lower property taxes.

Upgrade Where it Matters: Small updates like fresh paint, new fixtures, and modern appliances can help your older home compete.

Offer Incentives: Consider offering a home warranty or covering closing costs to give your home an edge.

8. Handling Inspection and Appraisal Issues

The Local Challenge:

Buyers are wary of homes that don’t pass inspections, and appraisals may not always match your selling price—especially in fluctuating markets.

Solutions:

Get a Pre-Listing Inspection: Address issues like HVAC systems, roofing, and plumbing before they scare away buyers.

Provide Maintenance Records: Transparency builds trust and may reassure buyers.

Be Ready to Negotiate: Be flexible and open to repairs or price adjustments when legitimate issues arise during inspections or appraisals.

9. Timing the Market in Montgomery

The Local Challenge:

Spring and early summer are typically hot selling seasons in Montgomery, while winter months can slow down due to holidays and colder weather.

Solutions:

List Strategically: Try to hit the market between March and June for maximum visibility.

Be Prepared for Off-Season Listings: If selling in fall or winter, make your home cozy and bright, and consider slightly more competitive pricing.

Monitor Market Conditions: Interest rates and local employment news can impact buyer activity—stay informed and act accordingly.

10. Navigating Buyer Financing and Offers

The Local Challenge:

Some Montgomery buyers may rely on VA, FHA, or USDA loans, which come with additional requirements that can delay or complicate the closing process.

Solutions:

Vet Buyer Pre-Approvals: Ask for proof of financing and choose offers that are most likely to close without delays.

Work with Experienced Professionals: An agent or attorney who understands local lending challenges can guide you through tricky transactions.

Be Realistic in Negotiations: While it’s tempting to hold out for top dollar, working with motivated, well-qualified buyers is often the smoother path to closing.

11. Building the Right Real Estate Team

The Local Challenge:

Working with an inexperienced or out-of-town agent can cost you time, money, and peace of mind—especially in a market as specific as Montgomery.

Solutions:

Choose a local expert: Hire someone who knows the Montgomery neighborhoods, schools, and pricing nuances.

Read reviews and ask for referrals. Prioritize agents with a track record of success and strong client feedback.

Make Sure They’re a Marketing Pro: The right agent should be tech-savvy, communicative, and proactive in promoting your listing.

12. Preparing Emotionally and Logistically for the Sale

The Local Challenge:

Selling a home—especially a long-term residence—can be emotionally taxing. Emotional attachment can cloud judgment and slow down decisions.

Solutions:

Set Clear Goals: Know what you want from the sale—whether it’s top dollar, a fast closing, or the right buyer.

Create a Moving Plan Early: Reduce stress by lining up your next residence and coordinating moving services in advance.

Treat the Process Like a Business Transaction: Detach emotionally and focus on presenting the home as a valuable product.

Final Thoughts: Stand Out Among Homes for Sale in Montgomery, Alabama

Montgomery is a competitive yet rewarding market for home sellers. By understanding local dynamics, preparing your home properly, and implementing smart marketing strategies, you can rise above the competition and achieve a fast, profitable sale.

[ardn716ashleighdanby]

Week 9 Classwork & SDL

Task 1 - Feedback for Progress so far

More photos of the footprints

Maybe change the working title

Consider what other bushwalks have to offer

Task 2 - Reflective Statement for the Campaign (10 MINUTE ACTIVITY) so this is just the start :)

A reflective account of the project to be written at the conclusion of the project: 800-1000 words minimum. This MUST include reference to your research on other photographers' campaigns and how your analysis of these has influenced the development of your project.

Creative Practice (making)

My campaign is a series of photographs that document the effects of kauri dieback in the Waitakere Ranges and the importance of washing your shoes before entering in these areas. I want to create more recognition in people when they see cleaning stations and stress that it is compulsory, not a choice.

Conceptual Engagement (thinking)

Research (contextualising)

A large part of my research went toward figuring out who my target audience is (and therefore, my final deliverables to match my target audience). I want my work to be relevant and seen, not tucked away in a stuffy art gallery for pretentious snobs to look at my work and say ‘oh wow’. Therefore, my target audience are children. I want my work to be used in classes and educational material to promote children to go home and stress the importance of cleaning their shoes whenever they’re next on a bush walk with their parents. It is proven that children are the key audience in getting parents to feel guilty enough to change their habits, and most kids have 2 parents! (If not more)(Wilson, 2018).

Another part of research I’ve done to help me with the process of my photography is…

Reflective Analysis (critical writing)

Skill Acquisition (processing)

My first steps for my campaign were to just get out there and take photos, I wanted to get experimental with it. As I’ve grown up in the area, I’ve been photographing it for many years and figured why not be creative, since I know what works already - I can come back and photograph those properly later, but why not find a new perspective to look at?

Task 3 - Visit ‘Trouble in paradise’ in the AUT Library

Task 4 - Reflect on Photography Rubric self and peer analysis

The rubric emphasizes technical skills and creative vision. It highlights that success isn’t just about taking a “nice photo” — it’s about making deliberate choices in subject matter, composition, concept, and execution. A specific element that I focused on is that all strong projects are INTENTIONAL. All the choices we make have a purpose. Something else the rubric highlighted is that taking photographs is the bare minimum, the planning, composition etc… all help to make the project better.

Response to Formative Feedback