#alkjira thinks outloud

[alkjira]

Peeps, in the maps and images and descriptions of the Shire there's not a graveyard mentioned anywhere yeah? And that's despite many landscape views we get of Hobbiton. I wonder if that means that hobbits A) bury their dead but don't leave markers like we do, Maybe they plant trees or something instead? or B) they don't bury their dead. The latter would open up for some interesting possibilities. It's rather annoying that we know so little of Hobbit customs.

[alkjira]

Bilbo is not a shy, delicate baby but the Bagginshield ship still has a problem with equality. If Bilbo is not a victim of Thorin, people think it's 'cute' to make Bilbo like an exasperated sitcom wife with Thorin as the dumb husband he has to babysit or "keep in line". No equality. I don't see this shit in other same sex Tolkien ships, just this one.

To start I just want to say that there’s nothing wrong with being shy, or delicate. And definitely not with being feminine. Feminine qualities often get a bad rep, ie “strong female characters” being coded as traditionally masculine to be perceived as strong. But let’s not sidetracked on that.

My take on inequalities with Bilbo/Thorin in fanfic is that it is an issue because people *insist* on having stereotypical gender roles. 

They need to have a strong character that is coded as being a stereotypical male, and a weaker character that is coded as being a stereotypical female.

Thorin: big, strong, muscles, beard, hairy, warrior, doesn’t talk much, and so on.

Bilbo: small, delicate, pretty, almost hairless, likes cooking, gardening, no visible muscles, and so on.

They forget the things about these characters not fitting into these boxes. 

(a pet-peeve of mine: since Bilbo’s big hairy feet aren’t particularly feminine they are usually not mentioned and I miss them, it’s really obvious in some fanart)

It’s not a coincidence that Bilbo is genderbent to be a lady a LOT more than Thorin is. And if Thorin is a lady Bilbo more often than not is a lady too. Fem!Thorin and male!Bilbo has to be the most unusual of variations of that pairing.

Anyway, the peeps who have this kind of view of the characters are led by their own biases to think that a relationship between these two characters can’t possibly be between equals. How could it be? They’re too “different”. So they get further shuffled into some specific box of how to act. 

Thorin can’t show weakness, Bilbo can’t save anyone.

I’m going to say it again, there’s nothing wrong with being feminine. A character is not weak for being feminine. 

But in this particular case I don’t see why Bilbo should be written as more feminine than someone like Dwalin. 

Still, the tendency to have Bilbo fill the shoes of the romance novel heroine definitely leads to some issues. Ladies in fiction (like ladies in real life) still get the short end of the stick more often than not. And this sucks.

I would however not say this is a bagginshield specific problem. To have just one example, I see the same sort of tendency in Dwalin/Ori. We have a big and rough, we have a smol and pretty, ie we have a pairing that tends to be written as not equal.

And it’s not a fandom specific issue either as it pops up in just about any and all fandoms I can think of.

It’s just really obvious with Thorin and Bilbo as they are a very popular pairing, and basically the main characters of the story.

[alkjira]

If Thorin and Bilbo can't have kids together I hope Bilbo gets Thorin a kitten.

[alkjira]

What if there was magic before and that explains much of human myths and fairy tales thus far, but then all the magic ran out. Maybe it was like oil and was a finite resource. Maybe some morons in the Middle Ages wasted it all trying to make gold.

[alkjira]

I’m not a fan of Bilbo and Thorin adopting Frodo because that means Prim and Drogo are dead and I don’t want them to be dead, but I do like our dorks as parents (I mean, I’ve written a series with that as the basis and yeah I should probably get back to that at some point) anyway

Thorin especially I love imagining as a parent because he’d love being a parent. He’d love being a parent more than he’s loved being anything. He’s not the King, or Thorin Oakenshield, or even Thorin. He’s adad. 

He’d watch his baby wrap a tiny tiny fist around his thumb and feel it down to his bones, to his soul, that he’d do anything to protect them.

In general I think Thorin would also be a more natural parent than Bilbo, because he’s helped raise his nephews, and Bilbo has a much more limited experience with children who are too small to talk.

Thorin’s main problems would be the overwhelming desire to wrap the kid in three dozen blankets and protect it from everything, and a tendency to spoil it something fierce when the kid is older.

I feel Hobbits in general would let their children run around as they please as soon as they’re old enough to do so, because what can happen in the Shire basically. Meaning that there’s many a conversation about what’s the proper way to raise a child for sure.

[alkjira]

Apparently Hobbits and Dwarfs could have met? Back in ancient (sorta) history I mean.

Hobbits originally lived between Mirkwood and the Lonely Mountain, but migrated to the West. 

The Hobbits moved away before Erebor was more than a mining colony, and it is possible that when Erebor was established as a Kingdom there weren’t anyone still alive who had actually met a Hobbit, but, (!!!) it is possible that there is a shared history here. 

Maybe some Hobbits stayed, or that some Dwarfs left with them. (Which could be why there are Stoors!)

I really like thinking about what Hobbits were like before they settled in the Shire. What similarities and differences. 

[alkjira]

Since Thorin is basically a natural sub, and since he thrives on making those he loves happy, (and since he would feel as if he's got things to make up for), what are the odds that he drives Bilbo up the wall by being all agreeable during the first part of their lives together in Erebor? It's not that Thorin isn't normally agreeable, it's just that Bilbo has seen a lot of the King up until this point, and King under the mountain isn't exactly Thorin's default state. So I think there's a fair chance Bilbo will quietly freak out when it seems that there's nothing he can suggest that will make Thorin say no (admittedly it's not like Bilbo would be making any outrageous demands to start with but still) and he'd worry that Thorin would say yes because he's still feel guilty and fret about pushing Thorin into something he didn't want. Heheh or he'd try and push Thorin into saying no by asking for more and more absurd things. (Think he'd get as far as involving Thranduil in something? lol) Anyway, my point is, I don't think Bilbo has the chance to figure out that Thorin is submissive while they're on the quest, leading to much befuddlement for a while when he begins to realise it. Happily it fits very well with Bilbo's take charge attitude ^w^ and they both live happily ever after.

[alkjira]

There has to be a modern ghost story about the kid who made their family in The Sims and suddenly the things that happened in the game started happening in real life. Like they applied the money cheat and the family wins at the lottery. The digital family gets a dog, they get a dog in real life. And at first this is awesome, thinks the kid. Only one day they accidentally leave the game running and things go horribly wrong... Or it takes a turn for the sinister and the kid creates a version of the school bully and sticks them in a pool without a ladder. "Mysterious drowning accident" the headline says. Maybe they need to keep playing because if they don't play nothing happens. Like at all. But if they play the characters will age... Yeah this could so be a modern ghost story.

[alkjira]

If Donald Trump becomes president I want to move off this planet.

[alkjira]

I'm at a level of shipping which has led me to genuinely wonder what people who don't ship bagginshield see when they watch the three films. It's so obvious? And it gets more and more obvious each time I see those two stare at each other. It's like... I don't understand a world wherein someone could watch the mithril scene with the romantic music and their lines and looks and body language and *not* see bagginshield? If you've seen more than a few fics from me I'm sure you've noticed I ship plenty of other pairings with these two dorks, but the films are so filled of bagginshield. (Even the actors made comments about it!) I don't know, I just think I won't ever understand people who say they don't see it.

[alkjira]

Peeeeeeeeps Totally still on some sort of hiatus that is part too much work, part writer's block from hell, part just being a bit meh about a lot of internet related things and part just just *shrugs* I will probably jump back into things sooner or later but since it might be later I hope you are all doing well and that you'll stay awesome.

[alkjira]

Something I really love about Pokemon Go is that people who aren't playing are really fucking curious about it. I'm the only one who plays at work and I've had to explain the general idea and mechanics like ten times already. It's really cute ^w^ they're literally ooing and aaahing when I demonstrate that yes, we do have a Pokemon in the room with us.

[alkjira]

Pro-choice person: You have the right to decide what happens to your body. Pro-life person: I have the right to decide what happens to your body. - Gee, wonder why I think pro-choice is the obvious way to go.

[alkjira]

What if water was actually totally see through, and I mean totally see through. Imagine being in a boat on the ocean and looking down and seeing *everything*. And oceans would be entirely colourless, which, maybe would affect the colour of the sky as well? (Or is it just the other way around?) And maybe clouds wouldn't be visible either, suddenly it just starts raining and thundering.

[alkjira]

We should stop using the expression 'ship wars' and start using the the proper term. 'Naval warfare'.

[alkjira]

Sweden has decided to put the pride flag on a stamp and suddenly i feel the need to acquire pen pals in Russia