#also... LOOKIT MAX!

[gaycrittercentral]

Welp it’s not Halloween anymore (and actually these pictures are from last year hkkhljhl) but who give a shit y'all wanna see my goofy lil Sam costume :D if you were here for my Halloween stream then you already saw this but if not then LOOKIT MY SUIT BOY

Fun fact, I made all this last year and meant to post it then but I was just too lazy whoops. So I'm tryin to do better this time around, lmaoooo. Anyway yeah! Samb costume!! If you wanna hear how I made some of the elements for this and gathered up the rest, feel free to check out my ramblings under the cut :Dc

This was such a fun project. A lot of elements were of course just staples of businesswear, like I found the suit jacket at H&M and the pants at Target (and hemmed them because I love men's pants but they don't love my short-ass legs), but some parts were a bit more complicated. The hat, for example, I also found at Target, but it had the wrong kind of band, so I just took that off and hand sewed on a length of wide black ribbon in its place. I ain't no milliner or haberdasher or what have you but I feel like it came out pretty ok! And the ears were an element that I figured would be a fun addition lol, they are made of fleece I believe? I forget. I gave them a bit of soft stuffing so they're basically two soft pillows, and then safety-pinned them into the inner brim of the hat--that way I can look like a normal person if I ever decide to wear the hat in public lmao.

The tie was an absolute delight to work on. And also torture. Y'know, kind of a 'why not both' moment. I ended up reverse engineering a tie I already had and cannibalizing its inner fabric to make the new one, since I knew I wasn't going to wear the original. The new tie is made with a silky blue fabric that isn't silk that I don't remember what it is because I have a sponge for a brain. Sorry ^^; But basically I replaced the original outer part of the tie with my new fabric and sewed her up by hand (it's not really a machine job as far as I can tell), then painted on the stripes with watered down black fabric paint. I had hoped that watering it down would prevent it from making the fabric stiff, but that didn't end up working because it required so many layers to be opaque, oof. There's probably better ways to go about it, so if you're making your own Sam tie it's worth it to do some more research! Plus, they do sell regular blue ties out there that you could paint. I'm just insane. And tbh I wish I had just bought one but at least I can say I've made a tie now lmaoooo

And I suppose the last element of this is the paper bag Max puppet! I love him so dearly, he was a delight to make ^^ I'd tell you how to make him but why do that when obviously I learned from the original? Make sure to put one in your car ok it's really important

God I love this comic. And I also dearly dearly love how faithfully they adapted it in the cartoon <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

Anyway that's it that's all I got!! Also because I've never worn this thing out of the house it doesn't have shoes to go with, I just got some brown socks. I figure it fits with Sam as a shoe-hating person lmaooo. ok that's all bye thanks for looking hope y'all had a happy Halloween!!!!

[thesiltverses]

I don’t know who types up the ask answers on this blog but to whoever’s reading this: how do you all feel about being alive and sentient? What keeps you going, what purpose propels you through this chaotic void? What do you think (or hope) waits for you after your inevitable end? What do you think constitutes a life well lived?

I'm going to answer this in the most wayward and stupidly overlong manner possible, because the previous ask had me thinking about puppets, and I was already mid-way through writing up a book recommendation that's semi-relevant to your questions.

Everyone (but especially people who've enjoyed The Silt Verses and all the folks on Tumblr who loved Piranesi by Susanna Clarke) ought to seek out Riddley Walker by Russell Hoban.

Riddley Walker is a wild and woolly story set in post-apocalyptic Kent, where human society has (d)evolved into a Bronze Age collective of hunter-gatherer settlements. Dogs, apparently blaming us for our crimes against the world, have become our predators, hunting us through the trees. Labourers kill themselves unearthing ancient machinery that they cannot possibly understand.

A travelling crowd of thugs led by a Pry Mincer collect taxes and attempt to impose themselves upon those around them with a puppet-show - the closest possible approximation of a TV show - that tells a mangled story of the world's destruction, featuring a Prometheus-esque hero called Eusa who is tempted by the Clevver One into creating the atomic bomb.

Riddley himself, a twelve-year-old folk hero in-the-making surrounded by strange portents, ends up sowing the seeds of rebellion and change by becoming a conduit for the anti-tutelary anarchic madness (one apparently buried in our collective unconscious) of Punch 'n' Judy.

It's a book in love with twisted reinterpretation, the subjectivity of interpretation, buried or forbidden truths coming back to light (the opening quote is a curious allegory about reinvention and cyclical change from the extra-canonical Gospel of Thomas, which is a good joke and mission statement on a couple levels at once) and human beings somehow stumbling into forms of wisdom or insight through clumsy and nonsensical attempts to make sense of a world that is simply beyond them.

It rocks.

The book starts like this:

On my naming day when I come 12 I gone front spear and kilt a wyld boar he parbly the las wyld pig on the Bundel Downs any how there hadnt ben none for a long time befor him nor I aint looking to see none agen. He dint make the groun shake nor nothing like that when he come on to my spear he wernt all that big plus he lookit poorly. He done the reqwyrt he ternt and stood and clattert his teef and made his rush and there we wer then. Him on 1 end of the spear kicking his life out and me on the other end watching him dy. I said, 'Your tern now my tern later.'

Riddley's devolved language - a trick which has been nicked/homaged by many other works, most notably Cloud Atlas and Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome - is a masterwork choice which may seem offputting or overwhelming at first, but which has its own brutal poetry and cadence to it, and ultimately which makes us slow down as readers and unpick the wit, puns, double-meanings and playful themes buried in line after line.

(Even those first five sentences get us thinking about cyclical change, ritual and myth in opposition to the dissatisfactions of reality, and 'tern' to paradoxically indicate a rebellious change in direction but also an obedient acceptance of inevitable death.)

In one of my favourite passages in literature and a statement of thought that means a lot to me, Riddley has been smoking post-coital weed with Lorna, a 'tel-woman', who unexpectedly declares her belief in a kind of irrational, monstrous Logos that lives in us, wears us like clothes, and drives us onwards for its own purpose:

'You know Riddley theres some thing in us it dont have no name.' I said, 'What thing is that?' She said, 'Its some kynd of thing it aint us but yet its in us. Its lookin out thru our eye hoals...it aint you nor it dont even know your name. Its in us lorn and loan and shelterin how it can.' 'Tremmering it is and feart. It puts us on like we put on our cloes. Some times we dont fit. Some times it cant fynd the arm hoals and it tears us a part. I dont think I took all that much noatis of it when I ben yung. Now Im old I noatise it mor. It dont realy like to put me on no mor. Every morning I can feal how its tiret of me and readying to throw me a way. Iwl tel you some thing Riddley and keap this in memberment. What ever it is we dont come naturel to it.' I said, 'Lorna I dont know what you mean.' She said, 'We aint a naturel part of it. We dint begin when it begun we dint begin where it begun. It ben here befor us nor I dont know what we are to it. May be weare jus only sickness and a feaver to it or boyls on the arse of it I dont know. Now lissen what Im going to tel you Riddley. It thinks us but it dont think like us. It dont think the way we think. Plus like I said befor its afeart.' I said, 'Whats it afeart of?' She said, 'Its afeart of being beartht.'

While Hoban is, I think, deeply humanistic to his bones and even something of a wayward optimist, the notion of human beings as helpless and ignorant vessels, individual carriers - puppets, if you like - for an unknowable and awful inhuman power-in-potentia and life-drive that lacks a true shape or intent beyond its own continued survival (even when that means destroying us or visiting us with agonising atrophy in the process) conjures up the pessimism of Thomas Ligotti, another big influence on our work and a dude who was really into his marionettes-as-metaphor.

Let's go to him now for his opinion on the thing that lives beneath our skin. Thomas?

Through the prophylactic of self-deception, we keep hidden what we do not want to let into our heads, as if we will betray to ourselves a secret too terrible to know… …(that the universe is) a play with no plot and no players that were anything more than portions of a master drive of purposeless self-mutilation. Everything tears away at everything else forever. Nothing knows of its embroilment in a festival of massacres… Nothing can know what is going on.

Curiously, both Ligotti and Riddley Walker have appeared in the music of dark folk band Current 93, whose track In The Heart Of The Wood And What I Found There directly homages the novel and ends with the repeated words,

"All shall be well," she said But not for me

These words, in turn, hearken back to Kafka's* famous reported conversation with Max Brod:

'We are,' he said, 'nihilistic thoughts, suicidal thoughts that rise in God's head.' This reminded me of the worldview of the gnostic: God as an evil demiurge, the world as his original sin. 'Oh no', he said, 'our world is only a bad, fretful whim of God, a bad day.' 'So was there - outside of this world that we know - hope?' He smiled: 'Oh, hope - there is plenty. Infinite hope, just not for us."

So, we walk on.

We carry this thing that's riding on our backs, endlessly bonded to it, feeling its weight more and more with every passing day, unable to turn to look at it. Buried truths come briefly to life, and are hidden from us again. Perhaps they weren't truths at all. We couldn't stand to look the truth directly in the eyes in any case.

If there is hope, it's for the thing that looks out from our eyeholes, which thinks us but cannot think like us. We'll never get to where we're going, and the thing will never be born. There's no hope for it. Perhaps we don't want it to win anyway. It's nothing, and the key to everything.

The Jesus from the Gospel of Thomas says:

'When you see your own likeness, you rejoice. But when you see the visions that formed you and existed before you, which do not perish and which do not become visible - how much then will you be able to bear?'

Kafka, writing to his father, begins by expressing the inexpressibility of his own divine terror:

You asked me why I am afraid of you. I did not know how to answer - partly because of my fear, partly because an explanation would require more than I could make coherent in speech…even in writing, the magnitude of the causes exceeds my memory and my understanding.

Kafka concludes that while he cannot ever truly explain himself, and that the accusations in his letter are neat subjectivities that fail to account for the messiness of reality, perhaps 'something that in my opinion so closely resembles the truth…might comfort us both a little and make it easier for us to live and die.'**

It doesn't bring comfort to Kafka, whose diarised remarks both before and after the 1919 letter make it clear that he views his relationship with the things (people) that birthed him as an endless entrapment that prevents him from attaining any kind of self-actualisation or even comfort, since he cannot escape their influence or remember a time before them:

I was defeated by Father as a small boy and have been prevented since by pride from leaving the battleground, despite enduring defeat over and over again.

It's as if I wasn't fully born yet...as if I was dissolubly bound to these repulsive things (my parents).*** The bond is still attached to my feet, preventing them from walking, from escaping the original formless mush. That's how it is sometimes.

Samuel Beckett returns again and again (aptly) to this pursuit of a state of true humanity and final understanding that is at once fled and unrecoverable, yet to be born, never to be born, never-existed, endlessly to be pursued, pointless to pursue. From the astonishing end sequence of The Unnameable:

alone alone, the others are gone, they have been stilled, their voices stilled, their listening stilled, one by one, at each new-com- ing, another will come, I won’t be the last. I’ll be with the others. I’ll be as gone, in the silence, it won’t be I, it’s not I, I’m not there yet. I’ll go there now. I’ll try and go there now, no use trying, I wait for my turn, my turn to go there, my turn to talk there, my turn to listen there, my turn to wait there for my turn to go, to be as gone, it’s unending, it will be unending, gone where,where do you go from there, you must go somewhere else, wait somewhere else, for your turn to go again

I’m not the first, I won’t be the first, it will best me in the end, it has bested better than me, it will tell me what to do, in order to rise, move, act like a body endowed with despair, that’s how I reason, that’s how I hear myself reasoning, all lies, it’s not me they’re calling, not me they’re talking about, it’s not yet my turn, it’s someone else’s turn, that’s why I can’t stir, that’s why I don’t feel a body on me, I’m not suffering enough yet, it’s not yet my turn, not suffering enough to be able to stir, to have a body, complete with head, to be able to understand, to have eyes to light the way

From Thomas' Jesus:

When you make the two one, and you make the inside as the outside and the outside as the inside and the above as the below, and if male and female become a single unity which lacks 'masculine' and 'feminine' action, when you grow eyes where eyes should be and hands where hands should be and feet where feet should stand and the true image in its proper place, then shall you enter heaven.

Tom's Jesus makes a particularly Gnostic habit of both insisting that the hidden will be revealed and demonstrating the impossibility of attaining a state where the hidden ever can be revealed. Contrary to C.S. Lewis, we will never have faces with which to gaze upon the lost divine and the mysteries that shaped us, and crucially, as Christ puts it, we would not be able to bear the sight of ourselves if we did.

We will never become the thing that's riding on our backs.

Jesus again:

The disciples ask Jesus, 'Tell us how our end shall be.' Jesus says, 'Have you found the beginning yet, you who ask after the end? For at the place where the beginning is, there shall be the end.'

The Unnameable:

I’ll recognise it, in the end I’ll recognise it, the story of the silence that he never left, that I should never have left, that I may never find again, that I may find again, then it will be he, it will be I, it will be the place, the silence, the end, the beginning, the beginning again, how can I say it, that’s all words, they’re all I have, and not many of them, the words fail, the voice fails, so be it

The final passage of The Unnameable, which often is hilariously shorn and misinterpreted as an inspirational quote about how if you don't succeed, try again:

all words, there’s nothing else, you must go on, that’s all I know, they’re going to stop, I know that well, I can feel it, they’re going to abandon me, it will be the silence, for a moment, a good few moments, or it will be mine, the lasting one, that didn’t last, that still lasts, it will be I, you must go on, I can't go on, you must go on. I’ll go on, you must say words, as long as there are any, until they find me, until they say me, strange pain, strange sin, you must go on, perhaps it’s done already, perhaps they have said me already, perhaps they have carried me to the threshold of my story, before the door that opens on my story, that would surprise me, if it opens, it will be I, it will be the silence, where I am, I don’t know. I’ll never know, in the silence you don’t know, you must go on, I can’t go on. I’ll go on. †

We bear this thing that's riding on our backs. We'll never get to where we're going, and the thing will never be born. If it was born, it'd be too terrible for us to bear. There's nothing riding on our backs.

It will never speak us into being.

We keep on calling out into the silence, we keep trying to explain or understand the thing that's riding on our backs, searching for a way to birth it before we die. Our words about the thing are crucial, and they're meaningless, and they're all we have, and they're nothing at all. We cannot name it and we cannot express it, but we cannot stop trying, and we will keep turning back to our words about the thing, obsessing over them, tearing them to pieces, putting them back together.

I'm fumbling at something I can't think or say, but fumbling is all we're capable of. There could be beauty and meaning and comfort in the fumbling, but it's also vain, and foolish, and pointless, and we're lying to ourselves about the beauty and the meaning and the comfort, and we're indulging ourselves pointlessly by going on and on about the pointlessness of it. Nothing can know what's going on. We will never get close enough to understand without being destroyed.

Thomas' Jesus again, warning those who seek to reveal what's hidden:

He who is near me is near the fire.

Riddley Walker, reflecting on the Punch puppet's inexplicable desire to cook and eat his own child:

Whyis Punch crookit? Why wil he al ways kill the baby if he can? Parbly I wont ever know its jus on me to think on it.

If you got to the end of this, congratulations: but the above is honestly the most appropriate patchwork of what I believe, what propels me, what I feel.

As for what comes after life, I think it's fairly straightforwardly a nothingness we are tragically incapable of fully knowing or accepting - it's Beckett's unimaginable and unattainable silence, a silence that his characters' voices keep on shattering even as they cry out for it.

-Jon‡

*I can't remember if Kafka makes prominent reference to Czech puppets in his work, which is interesting in its own right given the thematic relevance (the protagonist in The Hunger Artist is perhaps a kind of self-directing puppet show?).

However, Gustav Meyrink - who some unsourced Google quotes suggest was pals with Czech puppeteer Richard Teschner - did write a strange little story, The Man On The Bottle, about an audience watching a 'marionette show' who are too wrapped up in performances and masks to interpret the reality that they're actually watching a human being suffocate to death.

**Thomas Ligotti: "Something had happened. They did not know what it was, but they did know it as that which should not be.

Something would have to be done if they were to live with that which should not be.

This would not (be enough); it would only be the best they could do."

***Beckett's Malone Dies actually kicks off with a related sentiment:" I am in my mother’s room. It’s I who live there now. I don’t know how I got there...In any case I have her room. I sleep in her bed. I piss and shit in her pot. I have taken her place. I must resemble her more and more."

† I don't necessarily align myself in humour with Ligotti on a lot of this stuff but I imagine he would recognise both Beckett's writing and Kafka's frustrations re explaining the causes of his hatred for his father as sublimation: finding artistic and philosophical ways of sketching the inexpressible horror and uncertainty of our existence in order to reckon with it at a remove without destroying ourselves. A higher form of self-deception, but self-deception nevertheless.

‡Muna's more of an anarcho-nihilist, I think.

[talesfromthebacklog]

Tales From The Frontlog: Fashion Dreamer

6/10

I was able to belt out this review so quick because there’s not much to Fashion Dreamer. I got this less than 24 hours ago. So. Neat.

Firstly: I love it.

You dress up, make designs, dress up other people, and make a little in home store front for other people to look at. It’s stylish and fun.

But it’s not a game I would recommend to most people. It’s a very repetitive experience. Which actually isn’t a complaint. It’s relaxing and I can turn my brain off like I can for Picross. But even though I like it, I’m hesitant to call it… great.

Fashion Dreamer is plain bread and butter fashion. If you’re looking for something with a lots of side activities this isn’t it.

Fashion Dreamer has a gacha like system for what clothes you’ll run into next. Either on billboards, homes, or on other people. And getting designs to make on your own requires either a gacha or special currency to unlock the recipe.

There’s also a bingo game? This earns you pink star currency which is used for your “home” and creating designs. It’s fine. It needs a “Use 10 at a time” option like the gacha has.

Honestly? The most fun part are the lookits. People can design your character and send you the look they made. I find this to actually be insanely cool. I love it. I enjoy making nice things for other people.

And people put in real effort to make nice things for you too. You can see the thought put behind the outfits and I find that to be very sweet. There’s even a little guide to see their preferences, though following it isn’t required. I gave folks free range for me because… I like all the styles. I’m curious what people will come up with.

Love Nikki (Which is an amazing mobile fashion game. I played that every day for 3 years straight) had supremely spoiled me. It has a lot of small things that makes it great. (On top of being an RPG) but Fashion Dreamer really could take a note and make a few tweaks to make it a better experience.

For example: There’s no favorites button and the max clothing you can own is 5000. That’s insane. Why??? I don’t want to hunt through 5000 clothing items for certain things all the time? Just add it as a filter! Gah!

Speaking of the filter: a color filter. The game clearly recognizes color. Make a god damn color filter.

Also no “closet feature” so you can keep multiple looks saved for the one muse. Like come on, that’s a basic function. You can have multiple avatars, but that’s not the same thing.

Fashion Dreamer makes up for this by apparently being updated with new clothing and looks monthly (for free). In either December or January there will even be an event. So that’s cool!

Normally games like this are quite… lazy about providing styles that match all tastes. The design aspect of Fashion Dreamer could be a lot stronger. But Fashion Dreamer in general has a really good spread of “casual everyday” styles. Also there are men in the game and men’s fashion both fem and masculine. That’s cool. You love to see it.

Though while the men can wear some of the fem accessories, hairstyles, etc (and vice versa), it still adheres to a gender binary. You can look somewhat ambiguous, but that’s different than being allowed to wear the dresses and skirts. Mostly just mentioning that because… it’s disappointing.

Also. Just a side note (Just mentioning this because it’s funny), I made my model massive. I picked the tallest option. I stan a tall queen.

Nearly everyone I’ve seen seems to prefer the little chicken nugget models. So I’m walking through this game like a god damn GIANT when I see everyone else’s avatars.

Overall Fashion Dreamer is solid. But it’s a game where you have to manage your expectations. Kinda like a lot of games like it. You have to be aware it’s going to be a chill experience. And that’s okay.

Edit: WHY ARE THE CREDITS UNSKIPPABLE AND SO FUCKING LONG???

[thebrisingamen]

Pahkitew Island

Under the Cut! No teams since this season was SO short, and could've been something better but oh well. That leaves us with the Reboot here soon.

Amy and Sammy/Samey, The Evil/Good Twins: Since their identical appearance was a key plot point, I had to make them nearly identical pokemon. I settled on Meowth, solely because Amy would be an Alolan Meowth (Dark type, egotistical) and Samey would be a Kantonian Meowth; this would make the replacement ruse much easier.

Beardo, The Human Soundboard: In contrast with B, Beardo can't STOP making noise. Almost as bad as Staci. I decided against a Loudred and made him a Toxtricity (Low Key Form) instead. It felt more right.

Dave, The Nice Guy: Technically they said normal but I said what I said. I almost made him a grimer, because he's awful but I settled on Zubat because Dave had opportunity after opportunity to be better but still keeps FLYING INTO YOUR FACE WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO GET THROUGH A CAVE. Unless you have a repel on.

Ella, The Fairy Tale Princess: Is it any wonder that she's a Chansey? She might be a bit delulu but Ella is just kind and gracious to most people, even Dave and Sugar.

Jasmine, The Australian Outback Girl: This one took a while; Jasmine is imposing and really cool, I actually liked her character a lot. I knew she would be a fighting type, but I wasn't sure which one to choose. Honestly, thinking about it more, I think she'd be a Hisuian Lilligant

Leonard, The LARPer: He returns and is still a Medicham.

Max, The Supervillain: Aww, lookit him, trying to be evil! What a good little supervillain!! He's a Poochyena, which has to date, only done one extra evil thing in the Pokemon game during the tutorial, and summarily got its butt kicked. That's Max.

Rodney, The Country Boy: A Galarian Slowpoke. Still slow on the uptake, but a different kind of unobservant and can get obsessed with one thing.

Scarlett, The Quiet Brainiac: A Malamar; mind control, a bit strange, a bit mad and would probably lie in wait like she did.

Shawn, The Zombie-Conspiracy Nut: Starting out as a Wimpod, since he can survive but runs away and leaves anyone else to fend for themselves at the first sign of danger. Eventually evolves into a Golispod, near the end.

Sky, The Athlete: It took a while for her, but I settled on Flamigo; Sky is the most "normal" during her introduction of all of our contestants, but as it progresses, she gets more and more odd and she is very competitive. This would also explain why Dave would like her, as she appears like a normal pokemon at first....

Sugar, The Pageant Queen: I made her a Pignite, since they obviously pulled another one-trick pony for her. Pignite, being a middle evolution, is not very threatening. Also, dressed like a wrestler, so it fits what they had Sugar do for her show run.

Topher, The Chris Wannabe: In his title, right there! He's another pikachu clone; I made him a Pachirisu, as he could be a useful pokemon, but he's trying to be too much like Chris to see his own value.

[bumblingbabooshka]

I want all the cdlc ros to react to “Arrival of a Train” I think it’d really blow their minds

[ladywindrunner]

shit i need to do~

starters:

@fatesblades @iamladyproudmoore @diguerra (tyrande) @merchantofthesands @gaxsogrimshiv @lady-proudmoore @lady-shadestrider

replies:

@gaxsogrimshiv @fatesblades ( 1 ) @archmage--khadgar

update rules

update verses

update tags

ASKS

[slashingdisneypasta]

Jokes on the grouchy old man, that's exactly your taste (yes this is indeed a friend to friend call-out ask XD)

Oh no... I've been called out... what'll I do?

Maybe SHOW EVERYONE MY FAVOURITE UGLY, HORRIBLE, GROUCHY OLD MEN???

This is an OPPERTUNITY! XD

Jim Bickerman is my absolute favourite- lemme just list some of my favourite things he's done and said:

Gotten 'attacked' by giant anaconda skin falling from the trees above and then had the people he was with just walk off without him- while he's still getting up like I'M FINE I GUESS??? THANKS FOR YOUR HEARTFELT CONCERN! Yeesh!

"... As if you got the stones to pull that trigger, boy... " (I cant, he sounds like a cowboy XD)

Been called 'Captain Hook' and 'Long John Silver' cuz of his prosthetics/eyepatch in the second movie.

He did this thing in the first move where he's drinkin out of his flask and then sorta- swoops down to be CREEPY and make UNSOLISITED COMMENT on poor Elaine and I just- it makes my skin crawl. Jim man, I cant-

Also on his creepiness- he later corners poor poor elaine and says something like 'when i get rich maybe i come back for ya??... '. CHARMING, RIGHT?? Oh my god, Jim, stop. I got the second hand embarrassment and serious case of the creeps-

*Looks all casual and kinda lame/cute* "Listen, I'd love to hang and... chat, with y'all, but- " *Yanks up a hostage, switches to grizzly tone* "Max, is comin with me."

*Acts all bashful when Reba asks if she can call him Jimmy like yeah sure, no problem, its not like everyone around him is ready to shoot him in the knees or anything*

Gets overly offended about her then calling him a nutbag (Sidenote- i also love Reba and their interaction is the BEST part of the movie)

Gets all dark and intimidating when someone insults his family.

Nope's right out there when everyone else is getting chomped by a giant crocodile- but not without grabbing the bag of money first. Obviously.

"- but right now I'm just trynna save Dennis' tree-huggin ass."

"I'm about to be rich boyyy~ YESSIREE I'M ABOUT TO HIS THE JACKPOT! You with me?... giddyup." (3 different emotions in one sentence. Englund just flexing his skill on everyone else XD)

Goes 'here kitty kitty kitty' at a giant crocodile 😂😂

There's more but its been a while since I saw 'vs anaconda so this is it for now XD I'll move on XD

Otis. Oh definitely XDD That line 'You, are as delusional, as fucken ever' plays in my mind a lot XDD

Drayton is the GROUCHIEST.

I feel Chucky deserves to be here at this point!! XD He acts- and he is- the grumpiest fucking old man. And he is a blast to watch.

Hoyt! Uhh... this one I maybe should be a tad ashamed about... but no thank you.

Scar. As per usual I have - possibly, depending on who you ask, not me, - too many pictures of him XD

Rourke acts like the definition of long suffering XDD

Annnd my non-villain ones I'll put down here clumped together just to try and stay with the blog theme a little XD But i LOVE THESE ONES SO MUCH STILL!

(I can here snake saying 'Why' just lookin at that picture XDD Also I love doc's eyeroll haha, the man is so done. And lookit sheriff trynna act like he hasn't emotionally adopted lightnings speedy ass. We know your soul, mr. Don't even try it! I love him)

[oonajaeadira]

OBVIOUSLY I want to know about EVERYTHING!

I did see the asks for your Javier and Joel WIPS...

But I mean? LMR?? PLZ ALWAYS!!!

Branded??? 😭

Moar about Alpha Javi!??!🥺🥺🥺

GTTT? 😏

TAROT OBERYN!?!?!?!!??! dskrjdjsjdbdbxdjdyspdbfcj

But there is one... I think I know nothing- NOTHING about... which idk

I haven't looked it up-

But that might be illegal...

Anyway how about-

I’ll Leave a Light On

💚

(gif by pascalsky)

Lookit you asking about all of them without asking about all of them!

I mean, I said what I said about some already. But for you? Multi-tidbits!

Well, with LMR, it's mostly Din and LB being on opposite sides of the wastes, Din going toe to toe with Bo and LB dealing with Cobb and Uli-ah. Obviously busytimes is in my way on that, but I might as well let season 3 get into me and stir my heart up to get me going on that one.

With Branded...I think I can comfortably say I'm on hiatus on that one. I finally know where that one's going next, but I really need greasy writing wheels to get at that one. Meaning I need to be on a roll so it goes easier. That one's a heavy machine for me and once I stop it's hard to get going again. But those two are also coming up on a brief separation...

Alpha!Javi. It's coming along. It will be longer than I expected, hence my needing to postpone it. Here's another peek:

There is a slight lull in the greetings and you can feel your face burning, your stomach tying itself into knots. If you could stop yourself–clap your hand over your gland–you would, but it would make your instinctual discomfort more obvious by adding gesture to scent. Instead, you avoid looking at Lucas directly, show submissiveness, hope that it fades and he retreats.

Beside you, Javi’s chest rumbles.

It’s only there a moment–a fraction of a second–before he awkwardly coughs into his fist, stopping the growl and then pounding on his chest like he’s trying to dislodge a bad swallow. But it’s enough to earn a surprised glance from you and a stern look from the elder Mr. Gutierrez.

I'll Leave a Light On is the follow up to Light Only Shows You Where the Shadows Are. All I'm going to say about that one is... Sweetmeats already gave Max an invite into her home and that doesn't wear off. She's basically borderless now. And his eyes glow in the dark.

.

wip tag game

[whatsabriard]

Watch With Me: Hart to Hart 2x11

I'm very excited to get back to this lil project. With the thanksgiving holiday firmly in the rear view, my evenings are something of my own again. If I could just keep myself from getting distracted with other projects...

Original Airdate: February 24, 1981

Synopsis: Stanley's evening at a singles bar ends with a murder, and it's up to Jonathan and Jennifer to find out who set him up.

Why this one?: One reason, and one reason only. The scene in the singles bar. You'll know the one I'm talking about. I lose my everloving shit every time I see this episode, as if I've never experienced it before.

Jennifer: I don't know if a tequila sunrise would actually do the trick. Jonathan: Really? What's more your speed. A volcano? Jennifer: Something a little stronger. Jonathan: Earthquake? Jennifer: Ooh, that sounds stimulating. How do you. make one of those? Jonathan: A dash of undulation, shake well and then... Jennifer: The earth moves? Jonathan: Hey hey.

undulation? IN FRONT OF MY SALAD?

This episode is about Stanley. Stanley goes to a disco. Stanley gets in trouble. And blessed be, the people in the disco are dancing like it's goddamn saturday night fever. But first.

Jonathan's gonna have a taste of that neck. He's a neck man. It's 10pm. $5 says someone convinces someone of an executive office quickie. Anyyyway,

Stanley is a goober but it's lucky that he meets a girl who is also a goober.

The bad guys need a fall guy and you can spell it S-T-A-N-L-E-Y.

peep the bill. 2 white wines at $2.69 each. A "big spender" is buying theplace a round. Which will cost what...a hundy?

At willow pond, J&J are watching The Thin Man ("serve the nuts") and eating boiled eggs in bed. They want to set Stanley up.

Cooking is important to a man. SOME men.

"You call apples, cheese, peanuts dinner?" You asked for the peanuts.

They're a horny duo but they absolutely love spending time together watching old movies and taking the piss out of each other. They are besties too, which makes their love so so real.

NOTE TO EVERYONE IN THE HART UNIVERSE - do not take "special drinks" made "just for you" from the strange bartender. It always ends badly.

This is the funniest prop ever. LOL "sales".

Stanley is not good at following instructions. Jonathan is about to stuff Stanley's tie in his big fat mouth.

This is it. Everybody shut up. THIS IS THE SCENE.

HOW ABOUT SOMETHING CLASSY LIKE A TEQUILA SUNRISE.

this cowboy just called jonathan dimples. WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY.

jennifer's leather pants.

WHY DOES IT GET FUCKING FUNNIER EVERY TIME I WATCH IT.

i can't breathe

help

the chains you guys. the chains. i'm crying.

this chick is just sitting there teasing her hair.

Jonathan lost $3500 playing poker and he just...writes a personal check for it.

In the car, Jennifer runs a brush through her hair and her curls brush perfectly out into her signature coiffure. fucking movie magic.

why did jonathan use a personal check and not bring cash. not very incognito since now the killers know he works with Stanley. Yeesh.

"HEY WAIT, DON'T TAKE MY ALIBI!" stanley screams when someone in scuba gear yanks the bartender off the dock and pulls him under the water. LOL

But then he ends up with another body.

I just love that they have all these outfits just...in their closet. Because then we get such great outfits.

This is just a costume porn episode. That's why I love it.

So the harts go to a fancy dinner and Max, the sneaky devil, takes the magic glasses and goes to a poker game. Where he figures out you can use the fancy glasses to cheat.

why do they put the dealer's hand on the screen? He knows what he has?

so we all know max is about to get into trouble, right?

Apparently the Harts came home from their fancy dinner and went straight to bed without realizing a car was missing and Max wasn't home.

Guess, JUST GUESS how they were occupied.

Lookit Jonathan's FLY member's only jacket.

high speed boat and jet-ski chase.

what even.

"I guess you'd say you're beached."

[riajade01]

I have been playing FFXIV a lot but I’m realizing I have not posted any screenshots of my Warrior of Light, Bitter Thornrose. Originally she was kind of a Mara clone (hence the name Bitter) and also a Roegadyn. But she is now a max-height Hyur with pink hair and, as of last week, a beautiful flock of sheep.

Lookit this gorgeous farm girl.

Anyway. I am Bad at socializing in-game but I’m online most nights Pacific time so hmu if you need a Paladin or Red Mage for group content.

[sensualcoder]

Metal Max and Metal Saga

I picked up Metal Max Returns recently, and I've been having a blast with it so far, though I'm at the point now where I have to grind a bit. Even with its upgrades over the NES version, it's still got some rough spots. Even so, I'm enjoying it!

However...

I also recently got a copy of Metal Saga for the PS2 and...

It's an even better version of Metal Max! The games do seem very similar, but the quality of life improvements to the systems are just awesome, and the differences it does have really make it stand out in the series, like having the option to choose between different party members for your Mechanic and Soldier, and even the dog that comes with you! Though I do wish you could give the dog commands instead of it just doing whatever it wants lol

I just got to the point where I have a full party, and now I'm working on exploring and marking off the Wanted list. I'm constantly surprised how into this game series I've gotten, it's really sucked me in like no other JRPG really has in a long time.

Here's a selection of screenshots that I thought were great from my playthrough thus far:

The weird enemies designs return full force!

Scarlet is really cute, in a kinda scary way.

Continuing the tradition of naming dogs in games after my own dogs lol

The Tankasaurus is my favorite big enemy design yet. Lookit him!

Such a polite gun hound <3

Anyhow, I'm excited to play a lot more soon!

[release-the-bats-creations]

So uh, yeah this exists! LOOKIT my boy with his dads! Also a random drawing of a raccoon!

Also, don’t worry, Max is proud of Jules, but he doesn’t like mornings lol.

[pwnyta]

Usually when theres a new character I only level it enough to get diamond and then start saving my crystals/chests/etc again.... but somehow I went crazy and Maxed Lavender and almost maxed his pet so....

Also bought his costume like right away... turns out hes wearing those wrap around skirts like you see on Ancient Egyptian art. They should leaned more heavily into that instead of just mixing a bunch of cultures that are vaguely similar.... Ah well... c'est la vie

He looks perfect on this background at least. Lookit him. Gorgeous. I really love the eye color they gave him with the purple and gold gradient? Lovely.

Hes like ‘I give you permission to be graced with my presence....... (please dont leave me.....qq)’ Love that. The man is needy as hell...

;w;

 I thought for certain Lilac was gonna be a begrudging companion of Yogurts.... but he loves him and wants to protect him! :’3c So cute. Lilac is such a good boy.

Second fav? Possibly. Love a loyal bitch. He has to fight Blueberry Pie for second tho and IDK if he can do that.... although he is a beautiful shades of purple...

[the-wave-finally-broke]

1, 2, 11 and 14!!! 💞

1. favourite place in your country?

the centre! i went on holiday to uluru a couple of years ago and it was the best holiday of my life! i spent the entire time just wandering about in awe at how amazing central australia is. yes, the beaches are gorgeous, but there's something special about the outback. i mean... lookit:

2. do you prefer spending your holidays in your country or travel abroad?

don't really have a choice at the moment 😭 in non-plague times, my sister lives in london - so i love spending time in the UK with her <3

but we are super lucky in oz that we have so many beautiful places to visit within the country. also overseas scares me because most of y'all drive on the wrong side of the road.

11. favourite native writer/poet?

Tim Winton, Jane Harper, Isobelle Carmody or May Gibbs.

Snuggle Pot and Cuddle Pie are where it's at! behold, a 103 year old gumnut baby masking-up during the 1918 pandemic:

14. do you enjoy your country’s cinema and/or TV?

listen. i am unhinged over australian cinema and tv. the castle? a classic. the adventures of priscilla queen of the desert? must watch. the dish? send help, i am overcome with love. round the twist? was your childhood even complete without this? kath and kim? comedy gold. moulin rouge? be. still. my. heart. mad max? you saw it here first, folks. babe? that'll bloody DO pig.

but. and this is so important. you all need to watch the dry. it is just... *chef's kiss*

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again

started drafting this saturday morning instead of monday morning and forgot about it until monday night at 9 pm idk what that says about this week.

also there is a gif of a bug under the cut in the playing section, be forewarned/armed

listening been in some sort of mood all week and this matches pretty closely- upbeat with bizarre and distressing lyrics and sludgy undertones. singer has a mild case of indie frontman voice, hope he gets better soon. this is a song where i rely heavily on the lyrics google has provided me. “livin it up/on the doomsday clock” is a goodass phrase tho

reading nothing of note. bounced off several Batman villain one-shots but idk i have anything fun or useful to say about why i disliked them

watching like everyone else on this site, The Old Guard (2020). it is a really solid little modern B-movie! i would like to see Ms Theron in many more action movies! i really love when movies portray fighting/gunfights as things that are difficult and take effort and sort of step back and say “this is not a thing that should be happening, we are doing it because we have no other choice, killing and maiming people is an upsetting and distressing and really visceral thing.” please see the other good Theron action vehicle, Mad Max: Fury Road for another good example of this kind of this. 

but WOW this movie was gory as hell. lots of loving shots of wounds. lots of really explicit medical experimentation that made me consider if i actually wanted to finish this movie. i left a little shell shocked but i would eat seventeen more of these films like little gun cotton-topped bonbons and play phone games during the worst bits.

playing i’ve been trying to stop myself from buying Ooblets by looking around at the literal hundreds of games i own and going “let’s pick one of these instead” and i didn’t remember why i didn’t get into Hollow Knight when it came out. 

the reason i didn’t get into Hollow Knight when it came out is that i’m real bad at platformers and any sort of fighting that requires learning how to beat a boss and not just rushing in over leveled and beating them with a lot of close-range melee/shotgun type weapons OR sniping them from a million miles away. i’m a tiny bug person with a nail and neither strategy is not working out super well for me. 

i love the last stag so MUCH lookit him GO

making sox sox sox, two-tone sox.  

[dollvolk]

A very good pet day!! Eclipse has reached their full form and is now my beautiful mahou guardian, Star Spinel (after alchemizing wayyyy too many pine sheep instead of gryphons lmao)

And Cosmo evolved!!! lookit the little one sparkle!

I’ve also reached 500 affection with several NPCs, and so maybe I’ll ease up on my strict dailies regimen in the earlier towns and focus more on the main storyline before coming back to max out with everyone. I want to try my hand at accessory making soon too, since I’ve been feeling like crap for the past week and stuck in bed with nothing else to do :’D