#and access to new and exciting opportunities. In midlife

[theanmolkang]

Relationships in Midlife

Relationships in Midlife: Challenges & Opportunities The midlife years bring many changes, including shifts in relationships that have been established over the years. As we age, our priorities and perspectives change, leading to a reevaluation of our relationships with partners, family members, friends, and colleagues. In this blog, we will talk about the challenges and opportunities that come…

[theliqht]

fire inside music: What No One Is Talking About

How are they executing this?

These are accessing MOOCs, or Enormous Open On the internet Courses. Even though platforms happen to be offered from elite colleges like MIT and Stanford for virtually ten years, open-source courses continue to improve in amount and popularity. Now, even some local people colleges like Wake Complex School,located outside the house Raleigh, NC, provides MOOCs to a global viewers. This expanding availability indicates There is certainly now an unbelievable range of courses available to any individual having an Connection to the internet, no matter area.

Subjects MOOCs go over can vary from contemporary robotics and astronomy to Roman architecture and the American Novel Since 1945. MIT, such as, has courses centered close to Arithmetic, Engineering, Electrical power and Science, in addition to a surprising range of classes concentrating on the Humanities and Great Arts. The College of Michigan presents courses starting from "Storytelling for Social Adjust" to Python, data analytics, and device Mastering. You can also acquire Management lessons from HEC Paris by means of MOOC, rated by The Economist as possessing the 2nd strongest enterprise university alumni community in the world.

Some MOOCs are meant to be taken for understanding received, but numerous packages also provide a certification of completion by means of web pages like Coursera.org. Certificates of completion--which are unique from system credits--usually Price around $fifty. Economical help is offered for many who qualify.

Reasons to think about a MOOC

There are numerous explanation why a MOOC course might be good for you beyond time management, Even though most MOOCs let learners to work at their particular rate, which implies they easily match into most schedules, Regardless how busy. Other pros incorporate:

An opportunity to try out a major before having to pay for faculty programs. Any person hoping to decide on a occupation route, for The very first time or thanks to a midlife change of route, understands the stress of pondering "What if I am Improper about my alternative? Simply how much revenue am I going to spend just before I comprehend this is not for me?" MOOCs are a terrific way to 'dip your toes' in, so to talk, prior to the headache of managing common higher education programs and common college or university expenditures. You could Check out as a lot of classes while you have time for until finally something truly sparks your fascination.

Consider programs not obtainable regionally. There are pretty much A large number of MOOC courses obtainable on the web. Even if you live in Boston (where Harvard, MIT, Tufts, Boston School and Boston University are all Found) or Another similar university-dense area, you could most likely uncover a category or two through MOOC offerings not accessible to you domestically.

Master (or relearn) a language free of charge. Don't just can you take a foreign language class totally free via MOOCs, but thanks to classes taught at foreign universities, You may as well teach your ear by listening to indigenous speakers. Take a system taught during the language you need to find out and stick to together using English subtitles. The second strategy is a terrific way to fundamentally double your Discovering, but only is effective if you have already got at the very least an intermediate grasp of your language.

If learning One more language just isn't superior on your own to-do list, probably it should be: In 2017, New American Financial system documented employer desire for bilingual workers much more than doubled since 2010. This demand proceeds to improve. Greatest languages to study? Spanish, Chinese, and Arabic.

Build up your resume with wanted expertise. Perhaps there's a far better career at work you recognize you can do, but your manager doesn't Consider you happen to be competent for it as you deficiency particular capabilities. MOOCs are a great way to turn out to be proficient in areas like HTML coding, Search engine optimization analytics, or regardless of what skill you need to develop into the proper human being for that position.

Follow the backlinks in this post To find out more on many MOOC programs. MOOCs can also be readily available by way of a variety of educational platforms, such as Coursera, Udemy, and edX. But MOOCs can be accessed instantly via each College, and can be found by using the following Google research limiting syntax entered into your google look for bar:

web page:edu MOOC subject

By way of example, if I enter web-site:edu MOOC robotics, I get about 7,000 success, like this Introduction to Robotics Specialization from Penn Engineering. By utilizing this syntax, you can normally bypass the clearinghouses and find what exactly You are looking for on university web sites, even classes the clearinghouses may not supply.

Content MOOCing!

"Millennials," "Generation Y," "The Peter Pan Era" - they go by many names and were being born roughly involving 1980 and 2000.These are the generation that grew up with smartphones, rear-facing cameras, World-wide-web etcetera. They had been at a tender and susceptible age when Harry Potter very first took his flying lessons on his magical broom, whenever they witnessed The nice tumble of the dual Towers of Environment Trade Centre in Ny city on 9/11. The millennials grew up during the era of cellular phones, electronic cameras, email, text-messaging, mp3 gamers, handheld online video game gadgets, WhatsApp, Facebook/Instagram, YouTube Films, web browsing and what not.

A person these kinds of millennial who knocked my socks off was this youthful Lady named Anushka, a teen in her early twenties. Her white t-shirt with "MILLENNIAL" in large, black, Daring letters just caught our brief consideration and we could not stop considering her Exclusive Talent Presentation, listed here at Nirmiti Academy. The Do it yourself (Do It You) Craft was her unique expertise. She represented a young encounter of the millennials. In addition, it absolutely was her presentation that spoke far more of her to be a millennial. She was a true go-getter when it came to existing her unique talent in a unique way. We could see her beaming with pride and contentment to showcase her special expertise to Other individuals. She was so excited that she was conversing a mile a moment. She had a lot of to mention about this and she could go on and on and hold us glued to her presentation. The millennials like Anushka and plenty of Other people are inspired to work on factors which fascination them. Simultaneously, I could also see her becoming struggling to smile and current herself Fortunately. Absent are definitely the moments for the millennials the place they experience present and luxuriate in their surroundings. They may be the generation who feel the constant will need for Digital interest which sales opportunities them to overshare their lives and moments on social websites or go inward in deep conscience to search out them selves. This leaves them unconnected with the Bodily world all-around them.

Millennials can be a very praised and self-confident era. They are really a extremely optimistic technology. They've a larger need to own lifetime encounters rather than to accumulate product prosperity, Although they do like to acquire things that can help them to delight in Individuals ordeals. Millennials are probably the most educated generation. As the selling price tag of education and learning has become so significant and continuing to climb on a yearly basis, Millennials became extremely savvy with regards to their instructional selections. As opposed to previous generations who saw instruction as a ritual and an expenditure inside their future, millennials look at training being an expenditure, Except it's going to empower them to be able to be a far better particular person. They anticipate education and learning to assist them get ready for The brand new opportunities and challenges of this age, rather than assisting them by giving actuality-dependent facts/understanding. The millennials wish to be challenged by thinking of the longer term and how they might lead to creating a much better Modern society and natural environment. They do not experience the need to develop into "textbook clever / book worms".

They are aware that points is usually conveniently discovered on the net by their own personal unbiased action. They're the technology that features and prosper on understanding at finger "simply click". In the globe of open entry to awareness, it will make little sense to rely upon the classroom like a forum with the transfer of knowledge.

Instead, The scholars Substantially prefer to learn from the tales and ordeals of Some others. These shared stories and experiences enable them to augment their very own knowledge by learning from your results and issues of Other folks. This can help them steer clear of earning the exact same blunders as their influencers. Hence, they like to speculate extra in their time and money on these plans which assistance them to build many tactics that they might include into their ideas and final decision-producing process, thus building a new talent established.

We are unable to dismiss The reality that millennials can also be a era of uncertainties and fluctuations. They can be the era who likes to keep switching their devices. They grew up with know-how wherever all the things was at their fingertips. It results in being disheartening for them to not get what they need when they want it. Almost all of the items are handed to them with a silver spoon. This would make them truly feel entitled to get what they want with no Placing in much effort.

While They may be the foremost workforce of the businesses currently, they do not believe in lifelong employment. Lifelong dedication can be a fairy tale for the millennials. They normally soar from on position to another as they are constantly in quest of some thing new and much better. These substantial anticipations turn out to be their downfall and would make them less economically secure than their mothers and fathers.

Millennials are listed here to remain! They are really young, brilliant and energetic and they ARE the longer term. They are excellent belongings which the world should harness and use. They can be the era that is certainly revolutionizing the earth. They're the budding leaders of tomorrow. They adopt technological know-how and stimulus in the identical breadth. This technology can also be a collaborative and social generation that includes a center on comprehending and setting up their expertise by numerous forms of medium to find out the responses. It really is for that educator like us to deliver an arena for engagement and discovery and also become a written content skilled and mentor. It really is for Studying System vendors like Nirmiti Academy to offer an explorative and experiential knowledge and produce out their legitimate potential in life and at work. It is this transformational journey that we at Nirmiti Academy look forward to daily to learn, unlearn and relearn with these youthful and magical generation - the Millennials!

[prosteticanimals]

A best beginner keyboard piano

Just one such millennial who knocked my socks off was this younger girl named Anushka, a teenager in her early twenties. Her white t-shirt with "MILLENNIAL" in major, black, bold letters just caught our swift consideration and we couldn't halt thinking of her Special Talent Presentation, in this article at Nirmiti Academy. The Do it yourself (Get it done You) Craft was her special talent. She represented a youthful facial area in the millennials. Also, it had been her presentation that spoke much more of her being a millennial. She was a real go-getter when it came to current her unique expertise in a unique way. We could see her beaming with pride and happiness to showcase her special expertise to others. She was so excited that she was talking a mile a minute. She experienced a lot of to say about it and she could go on and on and maintain us glued to her presentation. The millennials like Anushka and lots of others are determined to operate on factors which desire them. At the same time, I could also see her staying struggling to smile and current herself Fortunately. Absent tend to be the moments to the millennials in which they really feel existing and enjoy their environment. They may be the generation who truly feel the regular want for Digital interest which potential customers them to overshare their lives and times on social networking or go inward in deep conscience to seek out themselves. This leaves them unconnected While using the physical planet all around them.

Millennials can be a very praised and self-assured technology. They may be a extremely optimistic technology. They have a increased want to obtain everyday living encounters in lieu of to accumulate material prosperity, Regardless that they do like to obtain things which can help them to delight in People encounters. Millennials are essentially the most educated technology. Because the cost tag of training has become so superior and continuing to climb every year, Millennials are getting to be quite savvy regarding their academic possibilities. Unlike former generations who noticed instruction to be a ritual and an investment decision within their upcoming, millennials perspective training as an price, Until it's going to empower them in order to be an improved particular person. They anticipate education and learning to assist them put together for The brand new options and troubles of the age, rather than aiding them by providing actuality-primarily based information/expertise. The millennials wish to be challenged by pondering the longer term And the way they are able to add to creating a much better society and surroundings. They do not come to feel the necessity to develop into "textbook clever / reserve worms".

They recognize that specifics can be very easily observed on-line by means of their very own impartial motion. They are the technology that boasts and thrive on understanding at finger "click on". In a earth of open up usage of knowledge, it would make tiny perception to rely upon the classroom like a forum with the transfer of knowledge.

In its place, the students much prefer to find out in the stories and encounters of Some others. These shared tales and encounters assist them to reinforce their own individual expertise by Discovering through the achievement and faults of Other people. This allows them stay away from earning a similar issues as their influencers. As a result, they like to invest more of their time and cash on this kind of programs which support them to establish different approaches that they may incorporate into their feelings and choice-making procedure, therefore developing a new ability established.

We can not dismiss The point that millennials are also a generation of uncertainties and fluctuations. They're the generation who likes to help keep switching their devices. They grew up with technological innovation where every thing was at their fingertips. It gets annoying for them not to get what they want when they want it. The majority of the points happen to be handed to them with a silver spoon. This will make them truly feel entitled to receive what they need with out Placing in Considerably work.

However they are the major workforce of the companies these days, they don't believe in lifelong employment. Lifelong commitment is really a fairy tale with the millennials. They generally bounce from on work to a different as they are generally in quest of something new and much better. These superior expectations become their downfall and makes them much less economically steady than their mothers and fathers.

Millennials are right here to stay! They are really younger, shiny and energetic and they ARE the longer term. They are wonderful belongings which the whole world should harness and use. They are really the era that may be revolutionizing the whole world. They are the budding leaders of tomorrow. They undertake engineering and stimulus in a similar breadth. This era can be a collaborative and social technology that has a target comprehension and developing their understanding by way of many forms of medium to discover the solutions. It is for your educator like us to deliver an arena for engagement and discovery as well as be considered a content material expert and mentor. It really is for Mastering System vendors like Nirmiti Academy to present an explorative and experiential expertise and bring out their genuine potential in life and at work. It is this transformational journey that we at Nirmiti Academy stay up for everyday to learn, unlearn and relearn Using these youthful and magical era - the Millennials!

If the above mentioned title confuses you, you might be missing out on a number of the very best possibilities the internet provides. In the meantime, Other individuals are growing their careers, preparing For brand spanking new life as business owners, or are Understanding new expertise or growing their knowledge base, generally at little or no Expense.

How are they undertaking this?

They're accessing MOOCs, or Huge Open up On the net Courses. Even though platforms have been offered from elite colleges like MIT and Stanford for virtually a decade, open-source courses carry on to increase in number and popularity. Now, even some local community colleges like Wake Complex School,Positioned outside the house Raleigh, NC, provides MOOCs to a worldwide viewers. This developing availability signifies There is certainly now an unbelievable number of programs available to any individual having an Connection to the internet, despite spot.

Topics MOOCs protect can vary from fashionable robotics and astronomy to Roman architecture along with the American Novel Given that 1945. MIT, one example is, has courses centered about Arithmetic, Engineering, Power and Science, as well as a surprising range of classes specializing in the Humanities and Good Arts. The University of Michigan provides courses ranging from "Storytelling for Social Change" to Python, facts analytics, and machine Finding out. You can also consider leadership lessons from HEC Paris by means of MOOC, rated from the Economist as obtaining the next most powerful organization school alumni network on the globe.

Some MOOCs are created to be taken for information received, but a lot of systems also provide a certificate of completion by way of websites like Coursera.org. Certificates of completion--which can be distinct from program credits--commonly Charge all over $50. Financial support is accessible for those who qualify.

Motives to think about a MOOC

There are many main reasons why a MOOC course may very well be right for you over and above time administration, Whilst most MOOCs make it possible for college students to operate at their own speed, meaning they quickly suit into most schedules, no matter how fast paced. Other positive aspects contain:

An opportunity to try out A serious just before shelling out for school classes. Anybody trying to come to a decision on a career path, for the first time or due to a midlife change of way, is familiar with the aggravation of wanting to know "What if I'm Erroneous about my preference? Just how much dollars am I going to spend just before I comprehend this is not for me?" MOOCs are a great way to 'dip your toes' in, so to talk, before the headache of managing conventional school courses and common higher education expenditures. You'll be able to Check out as many programs when you have enough time for right up until one thing definitely sparks your curiosity.

Consider programs not readily available regionally. You can find actually 1000s of MOOC classes accessible on the internet. Even though you are now living in Boston (in which Harvard, MIT, Tufts, Boston College or university and Boston College are all Situated) or Another identical College-dense site, you may likely come across a class or two by way of MOOC offerings not accessible to you regionally.

Find out (or relearn) a language at no cost. Not merely can you are taking a overseas language course totally free by using MOOCs, but thanks to lessons taught at overseas universities, You may as well practice your ear by listening to indigenous speakers. Take a course taught while in the language you need to learn and abide by alongside utilizing English subtitles. The next method is a terrific way to fundamentally double your Understanding, but only will work if you have already got no less than an intermediate grasp of the language.

If Finding out another language isn't really high on the to-do listing, maybe it should be: In 2017, New American Economic climate described employer demand for bilingual staff more than doubled since 2010. This demand carries on to grow. Ideal languages to check? Spanish, Chinese, and Arabic.

Build up your resume with desired capabilities. Probably there is a improved position at perform you are aware of you can do, but your boss does not Feel you're skilled for it since you absence specified capabilities. MOOCs are a great way to grow to be proficient in regions like HTML coding, SEO analytics, or whichever skill you should come to be the best particular person for that job.

Follow the hyperlinks on this page To learn more on numerous MOOC classes. MOOCs may also be offered via several different educational platforms, including Coursera, Udemy, and edX. But MOOCs is usually accessed instantly by means of Just about every university, and can be found through the use of the next Google look for restricting syntax entered into your google search bar:

internet site:edu MOOC matter

One example is, if I enter web-site:edu MOOC robotics, I get about 7,000 benefits, including this Introduction to Robotics Specialization from Penn Engineering. By utilizing this syntax, you could often bypass the clearinghouses and discover exactly what You are looking for on College web sites, even courses the clearinghouses might not offer.

Joyful MOOCing!

[ytsthepodcast]

I Want To Change The World (#24)

In this episode, Entrepreneur, Author, Nickolas DeGrange, and I discussed the pivotal moment in success. How this behavioral change occurs, we're able to detach and objectively view ourselves at a higher level of awareness. 

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    Transcripts for this episode can be found at the bottom.

    Get an interesting take away from this episode? Let me know about it in the comments section.

    Did you listen to the episode Leveraging Your Writing Creativity Like An Author (#5) Author, Gary Wrenn and I talk about not only his transformation. But the transformation in his writing process and the inspiration behind the cover. He goes into the details and the burden of truth behind the book production phases.

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  Nicholas DeGrange

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      SHOW NOTES

Standing back decreases emotion and increases logic.

Repeating patterns of events help us predict and feel a good sense of control about the world.

And much more.

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      Previous Episode

Your host Greg Favazza, and co-host Larry Oliver expand Your Transformation Station, as we look at the "levers of power" that not only run our government but run the world. It's Real Hard To Figure Out What The Truth Is (#23)

      Transcription

  I Want To Change The World (#24)

00:05:00] Nick, how are you doing, man? I'm super excited. Like, thank you so much for having me really appreciate it. As far as what I understand, you're an engineer and innovator and entrepreneur. I mean, you studied at Drexel University for mechanical engineering and finances, clear communications, one of your core missions in life. [00:05:22] So you have a great story and me, I can't wait to get this out here as far as what I can do to help you out and achieve what your message is. Yeah. So, uh, the garage technologies are, um, built off of, um, So when I started in university, um, I began working on alternative energy. Um, and originally it was for the purpose of like having my own car company. [00:05:53] Like I just thought that was the coolest thing growing up. Like I want to design cars, stuff like that, but, um, as I began moving [00:06:00] and experiencing more life and, uh, the real needs of communities, um, It became more of like, Oh, you know, this would be cool, but to design cars and have a car company, but there are more pressing matters and human life. [00:06:16] So I moved to Asia. I lived in Singapore for a little bit. Um, and while I was there, I traveled to Indonesia and Thailand, some for work, some personal, and I began to see the need for alternative, renewable energy that was accessible. In second and third world countries. So I began to shift my focus. Um, didn't really know how to build a business, especially for something that scale, you know, like, uh, growing up, uh, my parents are small independent business owners, but I was looking at something like. [00:06:50] Globally scalable. And I just never felt qualified to do that. So it was a lot of like battling internally with myself, as well as externally, like reaching out to investors [00:07:00] and venture capitalists with new technology. And I was kind of just getting laughed out the door, um, before like, as soon as I walked in because people without expertise in the field and just a generalist understanding where like, Oh, well, you know, that's not possible. [00:07:14] So what age were you at this time? Um, I started building the technology when I was 19. Um, and then I got it patented when I was 21. And, um, that's kinda when everything just like crashed and burn, like I had taken all the money that I had saved up from my corporate experiences while I was in university. [00:07:38] Like I had these paid internships. So one was in, uh, Singapore and then the other was in New York. So I'd taken all that money. Um, like living out of my car for a while. I was cause I was so committed to the cause and when it crashed and burned, I had like a severe identity crisis. Like everything I had believed in was completely wrong. [00:07:58] So I really had to look [00:08:00] at, um, what life was becoming, what w um, Like who I was because of what I believed. And it was particularly intense because I had just moved all over the place in such a short amount of time and kind of like drain myself of culture and, um, picked up these new cultures. And I was struggling with like, you know, who am I, what am I doing? [00:08:25] Like, what's my purpose, what's my contribution to this world. Um, so that's kind of that in a nutshell, It's interesting is the fact that you've had, like, from what you're describing is like a midlife crisis at age 21. Yeah. It sucked. Wow. You've been through a lot. One thing that I've, I'm really adamant about is like having other people share their stories. [00:08:50] A lot of people don't think their own stories are that significant, you know, mine just happens to be. A bit all over the place a bit ridiculous. But, um, the, the background on [00:09:00] everyone is, is what allows us to create relationships and community. And that's what we really need right now. You know, people are feeling more isolated than ever, especially with everything being shut down, people are starting to realize how few friends they can actually rely on what is the main objective with the grunge industries, religious too. [00:09:19] To spread hope through creativity. Uh, it's I think it's more clear now than ever to me before. It was like, you know, how, how am I approaching this? You know, I'm in a, like a hardware technology industry. It's, it's tough right now because a lot of investors are looking into software and things like that. [00:09:42] How am I. How am I bringing the mission of, of loving people and, and, you know, serving other people and meeting their needs through hardware and technology and, um, with everything that's happened with the coronavirus and then, you know, moving out here to LA and [00:10:00] seeing it's, it's a completely different energy and community out here than it is on the East coast, or I'm sure it is in st.

  [00:10:08] Louis. Um, And it's my first time being out here, but seeing that, um, so many people are speaking and talking and pushing their agenda, but nobody's listening. And right now, more than ever, we need people to create because when we create it transcends the boundaries of intellectual capacity and it hits people, um, like within their soul. [00:10:33] And they're able to adopt that message without listening to somebody talking. So that's really my, my mission with the garage technologies is to be able to spread that hope for a brighter future and more authentic, genuine, loving communities through, uh, providing tangible materials technologies, um, to allow people to create and to dream more and to serve more [00:11:00] people. [00:11:02] That is inspirational right there. I like that message. As far as getting people to listen is the biggest struggle that we're facing. Not because with what the government is telling us, whether we should believe it or not, but it's just, everybody is stuck in this old school mindset and we're adapting. [00:11:24] Yeah. Some people are not. And getting people on the same page is the biggest problem right now. But as far as if we were to look at creating assessable, renewable energy for the communities without traditional power, how does that relate with third world countries? Um, I think. [00:11:51] So, um, this might be a bit tangential the way I answered this, but, um, one thing that I've really [00:12:00] noticed in, uh, technological adoption is that there might be great ideas that serve people's problems, but, um, a lot of engineers and innovators and marketers, aren't thinking about the. Societal repercussions of what those technologies might bring. [00:12:19] So like for example, the internet or the iPhone incredible technologies, um, and they've really opened up a lot of new opportunities for us to advance as a society and as individuals, um, But there were no parameters around how far we could go with those technologies. So it's created both good and bad. [00:12:44] And one of them, the core, um, it's been quite damaging to people's mental health and, um, uh, social communities because we're stuck within something. [00:13:00] Where it's our own little world. Whereas when we're face to face with someone, we get to feel, um, feel out like the energy, that energy that they're bringing. [00:13:12] Uh, we get to see their body language, the tone of their voice, and things like that. Um, and through the internet and social media, we're just getting a fraction of that. And we're not actually building relationships where we feel like we can trust people because we're only seeing each other at our best moments. [00:13:30] And w we're not seeing a whole lot of everything that falls in between and people are longing to share life with other people that is the essence of community. Um, so like that's, that's one example, um, that I would like to use, but in bringing this new technology to them, third world countries, making sure that, um, a team is there to help properly implement, um, How much can be developed off of this technology. [00:14:00] [00:13:59] So say for example, like I send a team out, um, to help integrate this, uh, accessible, renewable energy in, um, a part of Indonesia where they don't have the traditional infrastructure, electricity, and electrical infrastructure. Um, so providing them with, uh, I guess, clean water and, or, uh, electricity to their homes. [00:14:23] Um, they can build schools out of that, and then they have their necessary, their basic needs met, um, and they can kind of tuck that away. And then they begin thinking about how to create, um, and build more solutions for what their community needs. Um, but making sure that that implementation period doesn't take off too quickly. [00:14:47] This is kind of like a, uh, engineering ethics problem. Um, and it's not so much an ethical issue as it is, um, like a, a [00:15:00] relationship issue, because if you're in a relationship with someone that you care about, you're willing to withhold the things that might hurt them. It's like, uh, you know, the example of, of. [00:15:12] Freedom. People think that if you put parameters around their freedom, that it's not really freedom, but you would never let your own child walk out into a busy street because they can just do whatever they want. Like that, that would be dangerous for them. Um, so in the initial stages, building out a PR like a set of parameters where they can grow and fill, I guess, that cup, and then pouring, pouring that substance out into a bigger cup and allowing them to grow rather than just like. [00:15:40] Letting it run out and see where they go. So would you say the parameters lay between the government issuing out a fixed amount to the country? That's a need for this energy source? I would say that that's definitely a step, but they're also [00:16:00] needs to be parameters within these third, second, and third world governments. [00:16:05] Um, because. I might have great intentions bringing this new technology to people who really need it. But if the government is the only one who's profiting off of it and they're not helping their people with it, it's not really helping anyone. It's just getting people rich. And that is a very fine line. [00:16:26] It's a very tricky situation. So, which is why my core mission needs to be more people-focused than capital or a technology-focused. So would this talk about Venezuela? Didn't go bankrupt because of the cost of oil instead it was socialism. Do you think that's relatable to that? Yeah, I do. I think one thing, um, that we kind of lose, um, and this is also tangential, but I think one thing that [00:17:00] we kind of lose, um, With respect to the media. [00:17:03] Is that happening? Uh, an opinion on something doesn't mean you have the same opinion about somebody, so you can classify an organization. And sometimes it's easy as, like a, um, a member of the audit and still be like, okay, well, that person thinks that way about all of those people. And that's really just a, like, that's an inventory. [00:17:27] Yeah. A mistake. Um, it's a rash. Rationalization to make, because an organization doesn't represent each individual member there, you have to see people for who they really are and not for what the organization is. So in the case of the Venezuelan government, like, that's not my opinion about the individuals in the Venezuelan government, because I don't know them, but I do think that it applies in this situation. [00:17:58] And that's, that's a part of, [00:18:00] you know, that's a responsibility that they take when they step into office that they are going to represent what's going on as a collective organization. But it doesn't mean that we as individuals, I guess, have the right to view them or judge them in such a way without even. [00:18:26] Getting to know them individually. That's one thing that is rampant in America is just opinions on things that nobody actually knows. It's like what's relevant at this time. And all becomes a, when people want to argue, it comes down to self, reflecting their own inner beliefs onto other people when they don't agree with it. [00:18:47] Yeah. And these aren't, you know, political opinions that we're talking about here. These are like, this is the human condition. And if we look at it. What's going [00:19:00] on within our own lives personally. Like what turmoil we're going through in our inner world were able to more accurately discern. Why we're thinking the way that we're thinking. [00:19:11] And I know that that can seem introspective, but we, if we don't check on our own emotions, it was like our emotion. Shouldn't be drawing though. It's very easy to get sucked into taking action based on emotion. They're more of like a, an indicator of what's going on in your internal world. There's like a check engine light, like, okay, I had this emotion I need to, I need to check on what's going on. [00:19:32] Why am I feeling this way? Um, And if we were just a little bit more receptive to that, there wouldn't be, see so much a division being created because it's so like fear sells on the media and that's why we see so much. Depressing news, you know, like I can't, I like to keep up to date with things, but I can't watch the [00:20:00] news.

  [00:20:00] And some people are just sucked into it because it's addicting. Something's always going wrong. How are we going to fix this problem? And the problems don't. Lie in a massive change of organization. Like people are talking about changing the world, but nobody wants to take a step in and build a relationship with somebody that they're close with. [00:20:20] So if we can't, even if we can't start on step one, how are we supposed to change the entire world? How are we supposed to change the entire community? What kind of a kid was you in high school? So I'm going to have to talk about not only. Who I was objectively, but how I saw myself from, from my perspective, because that definitely factors in a lot. [00:20:45] Um, so growing up, I'm the oldest of, uh, so I just have a younger brother, so I was I'm the oldest. Um, we were really close growing up. My mom psychotherapists, my dad's a mechanic. [00:21:00] Um, funny enough, my dad is incredible with people. Um, just like really genuinely interested in them, spending time with them can talk about anything to anyone. [00:21:10] I'm actually pretty amazing. And my mom is great with people, but she spends so much time with people professionally that when she is like out and about, she likes to like spend more time either just with us as a family or alone. So growing up, seeing that dynamic, I was learning a lot. Psychologically subconsciously, like there were things that I began to just certain body language and tone of voice and, um, all of those things that psychologists are studying, but I was learning it subconsciously. [00:21:40] So I didn't know the terms, but I was integrating that into the way I functioned as a human being. Like, for example, um, when my mom would like to catch me in the middle of a lie, What growing up, I was like, how could she possibly know, like I did such a good job to cover it [00:22:00] up, but she would know. And then as I began to get a little bit older, six, seven, eight, I began understanding that she might have not actually known I was lying. [00:22:12] She just didn't believe me if I was telling the truth. So there were some times when I would tell the truth and she thought I was lying and it was really like a stalemate type, whoever had more, um, Whoever committed more to that belief is the one who won the argument. So I got really good at convincing myself of things that might not have necessarily been true. [00:22:37] And that kind of a later in a little bit later in life, 18, 19 2021, that put me in a lot of positions and places where I should not have been because I was so committed to a lie that. People completely believed I was telling the truth and that was not good for me or them. So growing up, back to growing up, um, [00:23:00] I was raised by, uh, well, I should say like when I was younger and when I was in daycare, um, I spent a lot of time with like very matriarchal women. [00:23:10] So I spent more time with females growing up than I did males like socially. Um, And I think it like developed my thought pattern differently in away. So I never, like, I love sports and like I was into so many different sports and I'm like always super into learning, um, like self-education, but I was always that one kid who was like a nomad like I had a bunch of different groups of friends, but I wasn't super close with anyone in particular. [00:23:45] And, um, My original group of friends growing up in elementary school, transitioning into middle school. Didn't like that. So I started, I started to recognize the difference between being accepted [00:24:00] by a group of people and being celebrated. And I was like, Oh, you know, my, my friends, quote, unquote friends, aren't really celebrating me. [00:24:09] They're like, they accept me and they tolerate me, but they're not celebrating me. So I don't really know if I want to hang out with them. And that was like a really. The pivotal conscious decision I made when I was young, that a lot of people don't have to make. Um, and I'm not really sure why I made that decision, I guess, recognizing it like being socialized with, um, with kids who were maybe like six, seven years older than me growing up when I was really young, I guess I, I recognize that earlier on. [00:24:41] And that made it really tough for me because I was like socially ostracized by that group of people for like probably four years. And it really did a number on my self-esteem and he knew who I was, but [00:25:00] every time I was in a social situation, I seemed. Overcome with this anxiety, but because I was so good at lying to myself, I could play it off. [00:25:10] Like I wasn't anxious, even though I was feeling all of those things inside. So it was kind of just like, I was pretending not to feel what I was feeling and people would receive it as if I was confident and not anxious, but inside I was actually struggling with all of this stuff. So, um, throughout high school, I was good at sports. [00:25:31] I played sports year-round. Um, still had like a bunch of different, uh, groups of friends, um, but never really crossed, like I never really brought friends from one group into another group about anything just because I learned a lot about social dynamic and social chemistry, um, in those formative years and how bringing in one person who really doesn't blend with another group of people socially can really affect. [00:25:56] The authenticity of conversation and the energy [00:26:00] between people, um, you became adaptable. Okay. Yeah, extremely. Um, and if I became even more adaptable when I started moving from city to city because I realized that the culture that I was bringing into that community wasn't that relevant and, you know, I might be able to bring in those. [00:26:25] Um, I guess individualized quirks with personality into that community, but I couldn't bring, I couldn't force another culture into a community that I was joining because that's not how it works. People don't sign up for that. And I realized it's not necessary to force cultural and other people it's necessary just to be there with them and to get to know them and to accept their culture. [00:26:51] And who they are as a person because that leads to genuine relationships and ultimately genuine change. So [00:27:00] I started learning how to adopt and empty myself of culture and community and, um, different social cues, really fast over a short period of time. And it was extremely uncomfortable, but it was also amazing. [00:27:16] Mmm, that is, I just want to say that is awesome right there. What you described there is the ultimate key to success is, is when we go through a situation that we. We have this self-doubt, this anxiety and the way it plays out, it just starts out with a thought on looking at the outcome. It's not going the way you want. [00:27:41] And what you described is you reversed it where it's the outcome that you desired. Thus you're able to achieve what you always wanted to achieve without even knowing how you did it. Yeah. Kind of inception. Like, isn't it exactly that [00:28:00] isn't. What was your toughest feedback? I think a lot of the toughest feedback came from my parents came from particularly my mom, because she had such great influence in my life. [00:28:14] And, you know, the people that you care about, you hold their opinions in high regard. And, um, I can remember growing up maturing emotionally, intellectually, spiritually, and my mom is a psychologist would point out the obvious and say, you're not further than where you are. And that was really tough for me because I was like, I know I'm not further than where I am right now or what I am right now, but that doesn't mean that I'm not becoming who I was designed to be who I want to be. [00:28:55] And that was, um, that was tough. A lot of times to hear, especially from someone [00:29:00], that I cared so much about, because I still had to it, like, you know, it hurt me. Um, like it, it hurt my soul to an extent, but that didn't give me any right to stop loving or caring for her or seeing her perspective the way she did and understanding the dynamics of that relationship has actually developed, um, my relationships further in my own life, even if they're just the very entry-level stage, because. [00:29:36] It has taught me to, [00:29:42] to value whoever that person is, no matter what happens. Interesting. I like that. And, and that's, you know, that's sacrificial, but that's where you see the most [00:30:00] growth in relationships. Those relationships are the richest and rewarding because. You don't say anything with your words. You say things with your action as you remain, whatever your responsibility is in that relationship.

    [00:30:15] You know, between me and my mom being, being her son, um, and being open with her and talking to her and still loving her. Um, as you perceive we're through those difficult times, richer experiences of life unfold on the other side, So do you believe in the sunk cost fallacy? I'm not familiar with it. Can you explain it to me with the sunk cost fallacy? [00:30:45] As far as in life, when you're struggling, there's a point where somebody decides to call it quits and move on to something else, but instead you keep going through and pushing [00:31:00] because you invested all this time into it. Having that self-awareness to understand that you are where you're at, but you still want to keep going because there's a bigger picture that you're trying to achieve. [00:31:15] Now, now that you explained it, uh, it, it, the resume resonated. Uh, I don't, I'm not sure if I heard you properly at first, but the sunk cost fallacy. Yeah. And, um, you know, there, there have definitely been times in my life where I backed out of something. That I had been so committed to, um, and the pain that comes with backing out of something last minute, after you put so much skin in the game is worse than whatever else you're going to endure before you get to whatever that reward is. [00:31:51] Um, a lot of the times it's so easy to talk ourselves out of what we're just doing almost [00:32:00] subconsciously naturally. We question ourselves. We're like, why am I continuing with this? Especially when we're not seeing results. And we're very, as people we're very result-oriented, um, we don't value the in-between stages quite as much. [00:32:16] But, um, one thing that has been really heavy on my mind, especially moving out here to LA is like, the character is hard to find accolades and accomplishments are not. People have a plethora of accomplishments and I, you honor people for those, you know, like that's, that's something that you do in valuing people, but what's rarer to find are people who have refined character and who actually care about people and their characteristics and how things have, how their story has changed them as an individual. [00:32:55] To further change other individuals rather than accolades. [00:33:00] Self-talk, it's really easy to look at people who have incredible stories and say, wow, you know, they must, they must just be cut from a different cloth or they must just have a personality for that. And to an extent, yes, we all do have capacities and that's extremely important. [00:33:22] To recognize as you're pursuing what you want to pursue in life, because sometimes we're caught off guard by, uh, you know, like we see something that somebody else has on Instagram or the news or social media, whatever it may be. And we're like, whatever they had to do to get that or to get where they are, I'm willing to do that. [00:33:40] But as soon as you begin pursuing that and you start sticking, sticking it out and persevering through that, you realize whether or not you have a capacity to handle as much as they did over their life. And that is not like someone with more capacity is not, um, [00:33:58] any more honorable [00:34:00] than somebody who doesn't have any who, who has less capacity. It's honorable as to. It's important to honor someone if they're fulfilling the fullness of their capacity. If that makes sense. I know I use that word a lot. Um, it makes sense. Go ahead. Go ahead. Yeah. To say that somebody who, you know, and I'll just use a reference, but like a 20-ounce cup and that's just the way they were designed to handle more. [00:34:31] Uh, we can't, you know, we're not honoring that person any more than the person who can, um, who can manage 10 ounces. Um, and I don't want to like get into a, like a talk on religion or anything like that, but in. In the Bible, there's a parable of the talents. And three servants were given different amounts of money. [00:34:54] A talent was like a year's wages in that time, um, by the landlord [00:35:00] and he was going away and he said, um, when I come back, I expect a return and that. There was one servant who got 10 times. So just imagine 10 years ago. So I don't know, $60,600,000 over the course of one year. And when he came back, he had turned it in. [00:35:19] He had doubled that. So he was given 10 talents or he was given a, sorry, he was given five talents. He turned it into 10. The other servant who had two talents turned it into four. And then there was one servant who got one time and in his mind, And this is actually a word for word in the parable. He said I knew you to be a hard and difficult man. [00:35:43] So I buried your talent. And here it is. And the master said you're wicked and lazy, which seems aggressive. But he said, why wouldn't you at least take it to the bank and give interest? And that's it a statement on what we're given in our life. It's not about the money or the financial [00:36:00] capital that we're doing, but more so the gifts, if you have a gift to speak, you have to use it. [00:36:06] And it doesn't mean you have to be on a platform. Speaking to hundreds, millions of people. [00:36:14] Just one individual. Exactly. And for some people that's all the greater, their capacity will get, but to impact 10 out of 10 people that you were assigned, [00:36:28] that is just as honorable as somebody. Who is impacting a hundred out of a hundred people that they were assigned because they're fulfilling their purpose? [00:36:45] That resonates with me tremendously. So w how do you spend your spare time? So, um, it looks a little bit different in every season, [00:37:00] for sure. Um, I go into what those seasons looked like in my book. And, um, I only say that just because I'm able to further articulate, um, like what was going on at that stage of life, the people that I met, where I was living and how all of that affected my internal world. [00:37:20] Um, so the last, I would say the last three years has really been like, um, like I've really. Been stripped back of a lot of things that most people had. Like, um, my final year of university was 2019, um, because I went to a five-year school and, um, it was really like, I didn't have a job. Um, I was, it wasn't for lack of trying either, but, um, that's when I had, uh, fully switched over to finance. [00:37:50] So I was taking 20 credits every 10 weeks. With a week break in between and then doing it again. And I did that for five terms in a row. So I was like, I [00:38:00] didn't, I was really not interested in finishing school. Um, just because I felt like I had, uh, lost. My purpose. I felt like I had lost reaction. I really wasn't sure where things were going. [00:38:13] Um, and that's actually when I began writing my book, but it wasn't intended to be a book. Like I sucked at language and English and grammar and writing all that stuff growing up. So to write a book for me is just kind of still hilarious because. It's mind-blowing. Like it's nothing short of a miracle for sure. [00:38:31] Um, but I started writing that just to document my memories because I was like, you know, some of the stuff that's happened to me, this is crazy. Um, might as well, you know, I share it with people when I talk to them. So I might as well write it down. Uh, it can be my cop-out whenever I meet someone that I don't have time to talk to just like, Hey, read my book. [00:38:49] Mmm. But during that time, it was a lot of silence and a lot of isolation. It was a lot of spending time alone with my [00:39:00] thoughts. Um, and even for me, I became really, uh, developed, and matured a lot spiritually. And that was never important to me before. Um, I kinda just, I would say I kind of acknowledged that God was there and that there was a God, and that was about it. [00:39:20] And, you know, like the coal colloquial sayings, like, Oh, you know, as everything happens for a reason, you know, it's all in God's hands or it's all in God's timing. But during those seasons, um, like that extended period of time, like two and a half, three years, it seems like everything I tried to do and that I got excited about. [00:39:43] Just failed. It was like picking up something that was tangible and, uh, like it had material and it was structured. And then it just dissolved into like Ash or sand and fell out of my hands. And it was really disheartening and frustrating because I was [00:40:00] constantly, I lived my life growing up thinking like, what's the hope of the future?

  [00:40:05] That's where I'm placing all of my energy. That's how I get through difficult times. And I was faced with a situation over the last three years where I couldn't do that because, um, everything that I kept putting my hope in, kept dissolving in front of my eyes. And I was like, Ooh, what is going on? Like it was the most, it was almost tormenting. [00:40:27] Um, it like extremely, extremely frustrating, definitely dark times, but it was also the times that I felt the most peace, um, because I was spending more time instead of trying to figure out like things about the world. I was trying to understand who God was, and that is a personal journey for everyone, for sure. [00:40:48] So I'm not going to go, into that too much deeper, but in as a result of spending a lot of that time, Just alone with myself alone and figuring out who [00:41:00] God was. My, the world began to change dramatically. And my thought process began to change dramatically. And I was able to understand and articulate things better. [00:41:10] And, um, just be with people. One thing I was never good at doing, growing up, even though I was around people, the time was actually being there in the presence of the moment and enjoying those things, small little things, whether it was somebody's jokes. That wasn't actually that funny, but just, you know, honoring them for who they were as a person feeling comfortable enough around me to joke with me, um, or the little things that they talk about that I actually didn't care about whatsoever, but it really mattered to them to sit down and just be there with people. [00:41:45] Um, and it, it changed my entire world. So now out here in LA, my free time is more like, you know, I'm still spending some of that. Quiet time, usually in the morning before anything gets started. But if it's during the [00:42:00] day or if it's in the evening, it's going to the beach going for a drive, um, spending time with friends, things like that. [00:42:11] That's interesting for you. I, somehow I can picture you as an individual that would. Be a little shithead. There's no other way I could put it at this moment. And now it's like, I feel like there must have been a situation or, or an event that led to a behavior change. Can we go into that situation that led into your enlightenment? [00:42:38] I'm trying to articulate this. Yeah. Yes. So, um, and. I go into much deeper detail in the book about this. When I moved to Singapore, I was 20 years old. I always wanted. Growing up. I always wanted to, like, it was always a dream of mine to just move to a foreign country, [00:43:00] start from scratch with like nothing and just see if I could make it. [00:43:02] I just thought that would be the coolest thing. So I kind of simulated this for myself. I got a co-op over there. I had a company that I was connected with and, um, I had, I believe $500 in my bank account. And I moved over there a week before everything started. And I was like, you know, I do this, I'm good at this. [00:43:21] You know, I was, I was very, uh, like. Narcissistic at the time I was very into myself. I was very prideful for a lot of things, but that pride was just covering up those insecurities that I was talking about growing up, that I hadn't quite dealt with yet. When I got to Singapore, I stayed and stayed at an Airbnb for a month. [00:43:40] And the first week I was so jet-lagged, I would fall asleep at five o'clock at night after walking around Singapore and exploring Singapore all day. And I would wake up at like 1:00 AM and I would have a plan to like go to the club or the bars at night and meet people because I wasn't meeting people during the day after the fifth or sixth day, I was so [00:44:00] frustrated and just heartened by, um, not meeting people and having these incredible experiences, but not being able to share them with anyone that I was like, you know, I think I made a mistake and I need to go back and, um, It was like an intuitive voice that night as, as I was really considering like highly considering going back on my word, which was something I never did. [00:44:27] And it was just like, you know, that the intuition said, if you don't take this opportunity, you, you may not get another opportunity like this in life. And I was just like, Oh, you know what? Like, I. I did, you know, I did consider that. It's just like, all the pressure of this moment is just too much for me. [00:44:47] And I remember that night really thinking a lot of stayed up until like three or 4:00 AM just like awake with my thoughts. And I was like, you know what? This next six, seven months is going to suck, [00:45:00] but I'm just going to commit because I said I was going to do this. And this is what I've always wanted to do. [00:45:07] And if the next six, seven months sucks. So be it, you know, I'm here now. There's like, I'm not going to go back on my word and make an effort to change the situation that I'm in. And, um, as soon as I made that commitment within the week, I started meeting some really incredible influential people, uh, on the Island. [00:45:28] Um, one of the first people I met, um, Was this girl who was an independent journalist for almost every club or bar in Singapore. And, um, I was, I was, uh, like dating her friend at the time. So she was like, Hey, if you ever want to. If you ever want to go out, just let me know. I can just call up the manager and like, get you a table or a bottle, no issue. [00:45:54] So I barely paid for her for alcohol in Singapore the whole time I was there, which was like incredible as a 20-year-old, you know, it's like [00:46:00] the most expensive city in the world. And here I am just like getting handouts. Um, so that kind of just like catalyzed my recklessness, but yeah. In a direction that I needed to go, because one thing I noticed after everything after I, and I'll, I'll, I'll come back to that pivotal. [00:46:22] So moment in just a second. But one thing I started to notice after my life began to change after that pivotal moment is that if things wouldn't have gotten as bad in a dramatic, as they had in such a short time, I would probably still be living my life that way, thinking I was living it. The best I could. [00:46:42] And that's such a huge mistake that we make when we're young is thinking. And, you know, it's funny coming out of my mouth saying that like 24 when we're young, but it's such a huge mistake that we make when we're we're young and we're perceiving the world, the world in our own perspective. And the memories that have [00:47:00] shaped us is that we have it all figured out and that we're living life to the best of our abilities. [00:47:06] Well, we're not taking on ideas or beliefs that we don't agree with. And those things that we don't agree that, that we don't agree with or might offend us internally, might be just the thing we need in order to live the life that we've always been looking to live. And I was so grateful for that opportunity and I still am grateful that everything was so catalyzed. [00:47:34] Because I am the type of person, I was the type of person growing up. Like you couldn't tell me anything, like, well, you could, but, and I might agree with you, but I had to figure it out. I had to learn for myself. I had to figure out, I had to see, is it really like that? Or is it just that person's opinion? [00:47:50] So instead of saying, you know, somebody who is wiser than me and more experienced than me saying, don't play with the fire or the bonfire don't touch it. It's going to burn you. [00:48:00] I was like, yeah, well maybe I'm Superman. Maybe that's not the case. And that was such a humbling experience. And I'm so grateful for it. [00:48:10] People talk about it. I'm like check your pride, but when we're actually acting out our lives and we're not just, uh, pretending where someone, then we figure out real quick, Who we actually are. And I figured out real quick that I wasn't some type of Superman or I wasn't some type of genius. I wasn't that special, even though I thought I was, and I got burned by life and it was the most traumatic, but also most amazing experience I've ever had because I can look back at that and say like, okay, I'm healed now. [00:48:50] I'm, I'm, you know, I'm still becoming better, but it's not about me. It's about. Understanding that what I have is really for [00:49:00] other people. Um, and that was, that was extremely pivotal to me. So the going back to the moment that caused a lot of the behavioral change, um, I was like a self-proclaimed Casanova. [00:49:15] Um, like I, I remember in high school thinking like, because my self-esteem was so low, like that, I wasn't good with girls, even though I had so many friends who were girls. And when I went to college, I was just like, I'm just going to take advantage of this. So, um, I was like, and I talk about it. I was like sleeping with a lot of different girls and it was, it was a very narcissistic like ill-intentioned pursuit because I didn't actually care about a lot of those girls. [00:49:48] It was just more so for me, And when I actually started, there was a girl that I dated in single, or he is, um, fine of years older than me. And she started to like shake my world, [00:50:00] um, of culture, big time. And, um, she was like making me better in a way when we were dating. And then yeah, things got like things moved way too fast, got way too toxic.

  [00:50:13] And I was like, I realized I was like, we can't keep dating. So. I told her one day I was like, we gotta break up. Like, I can't continue to do this. And I go into why I made that decision. And what caused that in the book after that, I started to realize it wasn't other people who had the problem, that it was actually me. [00:50:33] And that was really tough to recognize. Um, and that's when I started to realize like I needed help and I wasn't as awesome as I thought I was. And, um, I started to spend a lot more time alone. And, um, just, I got more introspective and it got kind of dangerous because I would get into these intense battles in my mind, you know like we can't always control the thoughts that [00:51:00] come to us. [00:51:01] Um, sometimes we have thoughts, like don't think of a pink elephant, and I know that's like a. That's something that another person initiates, but sometimes when we're thinking about something and then thought just comes, it's really easy to like dwell or meditate on that thought. And if it's not a good thought and that's destructive to us and that's what began happening. [00:51:23] Um, but I also began building better relationships, healthier relationships. And one night I went out with some friends. And, um, I ended up bringing this girl back home and I woke up in the morning and from spending so many, so much time with people, you know how, like you can kind of, when you meet someone or you talk to someone for a bit, like you can understand who they are. [00:51:48] Like, you have an idea of their character or the personality almost like possessing, like an empath sort of mentality. Just kind of can [00:52:00] MP like intuitively understand. Who they are and what they've been through and a present once you meet them. Yeah. Yeah. So that didn't happen this time. And it was, she was the first person I ever met that I like the best way to describe it as like she had no soul like she was a black hole. [00:52:21] She was a void of a person and it was the strangest and. Oddest, uh, like, I don't want to say terrifying, but it was definitely scary being in that proximity with someone who likes, I don't want to say she was a sociopath, but like, she, it, it felt like there was no, there was no character, substance or personality within her whatsoever. [00:52:46] And like, we had talked the night before we had talked in the morning, I looked out my window and I heard this voice that. Was not my own intuition. And I don't want to [00:53:00] say it was like the voice of God because it wasn't an audible voice, but it was, it had power and authority behind it. And I knew it wasn't mine. [00:53:09] And I don't want to give that away cause that's like a turning point in my book. But when I heard what that voice had to say, it shook me to my core and I tried to just shake it off. I was like that didn't actually just happen. Um, and the more I tried to forget about it, the more disturbed I became with the statement and that led to just me needing to find peace and answers in something. [00:53:46] And it began a search for me really. And you said earlier, like, You could picture a behavioral change for sure. You're right. But it wasn't, this wasn't self-help, this was a [00:54:00] lot different than that. Um, and I go through the differences between self-help and like the encounter that I had that really changed my life from that point on, in my book. [00:54:12] And I think I don't, it's not that I don't want to talk about it here, but I think I can articulate it a lot better because when I was writing, I didn't have. Um, like, uh, voice intonations and body, the language to be able to explain this. So I really had to use my words, find the right diction for what actually happened. [00:54:31] Because before that point I was really into self-help and I was kind of like seduced by this. If you just do it and you persevere and you make it happen for yourself, then that's how you get things. And I was very performance. I like it, I had a great deal of performance identity. And when I had that encounter and things began to my life dramatically began to change. [00:54:56] I realized that wasn't so much the case anymore, and that scared me. [00:55:00] that is what threw me into an identity crisis. Okay. We can zoom out. What led to your transformation. Would you say the essence? Was timing. Yeah, I would. And I would say, um, the relentless pursuit of what I wanted in life, whether the outcome was good or bad, it's still led me on the path that I needed to be. [00:55:29] And I know that sounds a bit esoteric. But in a generation where people love to talk and not do anything, you can never actually know if your theory is true in life. People have a lot of beliefs that they die for, but they won't actually enact them. So for me, it was actually pursuing those beliefs with all of my energy. [00:55:53] And that led me to a place that was not pretty, but here I am. Out of that situation and I can [00:56:00] live to tell the tale. So I might as well share that because when you act on something, it actually tests the theory it's like in science, you can have theories of like, you know, this, this works mathematically, theoretically, the con the concept is there, but when it's out, it's tangible, it's manifest. [00:56:25] Are the conditions, the same to our listeners, some good advice to follow, and some bad advice to avoid. What would you let them know? This is a hard one because this was hard for me, but some good advice that I would give. And, you know, this is something that the audience is going to have to sit with and chew on, but being more interested in others than you are with yourself. [00:56:53] And that's not saying don't recognize your own value because those are two very different statements when you don't recognize your [00:57:00] own value. And you're interested in others all the time. It's like almost a coping mechanism of like, I'm not important. Therefore I need to focus on other people. What I'm saying is to recognize your importance, spend time discovering who you were designed to be, um, spend time discovering what you're good at and how to value valuable you are. [00:57:21] In your community in society, but don't be more interested in yourself in your accolades and your accomplishments than you are in other people's characters. [00:57:36] So that's my, I guess my good advice, um, and that advice will lead every individual down a different path. It looks different for everyone. Um, there's not like a one size fits all for how to do life. And we love, especially in American culture. We love to have all of the steps [00:58:00] and the keys to success, and they need to look exactly the same for everyone. [00:58:03] And that's just not the case. We have to, we have to be understanding that it's going to look different for different people. And that's valuable in knowing. Um, because you're in, in knowing that and accepting that you're saying, okay, I actually value you as an individual. You are at a different, you have different skill sets, you have different strengths and weaknesses than me. [00:58:24] Um, and therefore your path, the keys to your success in life are going to look different. Um, my advice for things to avoid. [00:58:41] Hmm. Never. And then this is super important. Never think you're wiser than you are because the moment that you think you have everything figured out, you're going to get humbled immediately. [00:59:00] But if you're the opposite side to this as is this it's not intentional naivety, it's living life in mystery and curiosity. [00:59:10] And that is what creates a fulfilled life because we're able to keep in touch with our inner child. The reason childhood is so exciting is because we're constantly in awe of the mystery of life. And we're constantly curious, and we can pursue answers all we want to. We still have to be okay with never having answers to some questions and that's life. [00:59:35] That's what keeps it interesting. That's what gives it flavor. So my advice, especially because I thought I was wiser than I was when I was young is never thought that you have it all figured out because there's never going to be that point. Like the journey of life is the discovery at all times. And the more comfortable you are in life, the less you're discovering

  [01:00:02] [01:00:00] that is that is spot on. That I'm excited to see where you're going to end up Nicholas. What is the name of your book and how can our listeners find it? So, um, it's on Amazon. Um, it's called the one who follows and the author title is actually NC to go launch. Um, I just abbreviated my, uh, my first and middle initial, because I guess that's what authors do. [01:00:36] Um, but I can actually send you the link if you, uh, if you want to share it with, uh, with the audience. Yes, that'll be great. I'll be sure to incorporate everything we said in the show notes as well. How can our listeners get in touch with you? So I am kind of a social ghost, but I do have a LinkedIn and Instagram. [01:00:57] So my LinkedIn is [01:01:00] Nicholas to grunge and my Instagram, I guess its handle is at Nicholas to grudge. Let me share that, link that into the show notes as well. Nicholas, is there anything else that we did not touch on or you would like to say before we wrap this up? No, I really feel like this was, this was an incredible chat that we've had and I'm just so grateful that you had me on your platform. [01:01:32] You are very welcome. Everybody deserves a chance. There's plenty of room for everybody to get out there and experience life in their own way. And I appreciate you coming on. This has been a great talk. Thank you.

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Caregiving and Finances — Sitting Poolside with Kristen Edens

The Sitting Poolside interview series

When people think of retirement, scenes of beachfront homes, rounds of golf, or reading by the pool come to mind. Sitting Poolside is a series of interviews that challenges that notion and other financial misperceptions. The series name pokes fun at the stereotypes, but it’s also an opportunity to discuss people’s real stories and unique insights. So grab a piña colada and pull up your lounge chair!

Kristen Edens from KristenEdens.com/ManagingMidlife

The middle period of life can be full of many transitions and changes. In a recent chat with Kristen Edens, she mentioned how challenging balancing caregiving and finances has been. For this installment of the Sitting Poolside Interview Series, I invited Kristen to share her story. 

On her site, Kristen talks about how she found her “why” in life. She helps her readers discover who they are and what their purpose is for their lives.

Mr. SR (MSR): Kristen, please tell us about your experience and what inspired you to start kristeneden.com/ManagingMidlife?

Reinvention starts with a business

Kristen Edens (KE): My business and blog was a process that began in the mid-2000s. I was employed as an exercise physiologist and making 62 cents above minimum wage. I loved the job but wasn’t making the difference I wanted to make for people. At that time, I didn’t know what “that difference” was going to be, but I knew something was missing.

Caregiving introduces itself

As I was figuring this out, my attempts at fixing a failing marriage had run dry and I divorced in late 2009. Through this heartbreaking experience, I moved across the country to start over, creating Kris the Scribbler, a copywriting service. At the same time, I became a long-distance caregiver for my father who lived 500 miles away. Once a month, I travelled to help my mother as she coped with my father’s injuries and his care. As a new freelancer, I felt the events leading up to this were a good sign to build a business and help my parents.

Caregiving X 1.5

Two years later, my daughter moved in with her newborn child. In addition to entrepreneurship, I am still a long-distance caregiver and caring for my granddaughter. I was deep into the Sandwich Generation lifestyle – a term given to individuals who care for parents and their children. I’m still pleased to have freelancing to support me.

Slow Growth

During 2010 to 2015, Kris the Scribbler made very slow progress. I worked long hours balancing work, life, and caregiving. I acquired many one-time jobs, and the occasional retainer client. Many tell me I need to blog since I am such a great writer. The problem: I wasn’t motivated. It made no sense that I could enjoy the process for my clients yet couldn’t motivate myself. In mid-2012, I made a vow to write 2 blogs per month with topics on networking, writing for business, entrepreneurship, creating the ideal newsletter, and grammar issues. Still, enthusiasm and desire were absent.

Hints of Change

A change came following an editorial assignment for one of my clients. With my media pass in hand, I attended FinCon 2012 (held in St. Louis). I was intrigued with the money and media themes and felt I had found a group I could relate to—the pursuit of financial independence. The only trouble: no time to get involved. I promise myself to eventually get involved with FinCon.

Between caregiving, entrepreneurship, and some self-care, my days were full. Part of my debt-free success was due to living a frugal, minimalist lifestyle. Another part was living with and sharing expenses with my daughter, cousin, and her roommate. We all worked together to ensure bills were paid fairly. However, personalities sometimes clashed and we shared a few difficult conversations.

Caregiving 2.5

The caregiving bug strikes again when in late 2014, my partner suffers a workplace injury and is disabled. By now, I’m frazzled, frustrated, and wildly concerned about finances. To help myself cope, I start writing about my experience as a 50 year old entrepreneur, caregiving, and the quest for financial freedom.

Something Amazing Happens

That’s when my blogging got noticed! Readers reached out to me to find out how I managed it all and kept my sanity. They wanted to know more. They wanted to learn from me. Many asked when my next blog was coming out and what it was going to be about. Not only that, many shared their personal stories with me, quickly filling an editorial calendar with plenty of blogging themes. My interest took off and I received a double benefit: 1) sharing my experiences and frustrations, and 2) helping others.

I found a way to make a difference!

MSR: How did the events up to now lead to Managing Midlife?

KE: Inspired by the response, I repurposed my business and website to KristenEdens.com with the blog, Managing Midlife, within the site. I had considered separating the two as separate entities, but combined them as one integrated site due to time constraints and technical skills. I researched many blogs and businesses, and saw a fairly even split for both options. Creating one site was my best option.

Following my father’s death in 2015, my mother suffered depression and loneliness, so I continued to visit her monthly. My daughter and granddaughter had moved to their own apartment, yet still relied on me for ongoing help (can’t blame the daughter for not wanting to live with her mother!)

By 2018, business as Kristen Edens LLC is attracting more clients yet still not providing the windfall of income and financial independence that everyone claims. It is TOUGH to balance business and caregiving! Yet I still had plenty to blog about.

That year, I decided to treat myself to attend FinCon2018 in Orlando, Florida. It was a financial pinch to attend, but I had given up so much the past 6 years that I considered this a much-needed retreat for myself. The biggest takeaway following the event was the personal goal to win the Plutus Award for Best Baby Boomer blog and to become a speaker for 2019.

Caregiving 2.5 plus Determination

My goal kept me moving forward. I acquired one retainer client and occasional content writing and consulting clients. After 4 years of long-distance caregiving for my mother, she finally moved closer December 2018. Unfortunately, her health took a steady decline and I spent much of my time continuing care for her. My business, blog, and caregiving topped 80 hours per week. Even with this grueling schedule, I was nominated and eventually became a finalist for the 2019 Plutus Awards for Best Baby Boomer blog! I was also accepted as a FinCon speaker for a discussion based on my blog, FIReD: Financial Independence ReDefined After 50.

This was a very exciting time for me, although bittersweet. While my mother’s health continued to decline, I still chose to attend FinCon 2019. I got the word my mother died just two hours before the Plutus Awards ceremony.

MSR: After going through that journey, what have you learned?

KE: I can summarize the lessons learned into 4 areas:

1. Sacrifices are a necessity

Amazingly, from my father’s death until my mother’s death, I consistently created weekly blogs. However, I could no longer keep up with my e-newsletter, and my client load was limited. It was very difficult to manage all the things I had to do PLUS be a business owner. Clients, and therefore, income, took a hit. Be prepared to make sacrifices and determine where these will fall.

2. Avoid the compare and despair mindset

Although I worked my tail off to build a business, I wasn’t making the “6-figure” income many freelancers brag about. I fell into the despair and despise mindset: despair by compare, and despise the 6-figure claims. I had several cuss and cry sessions, but realized this was wasted time. Everyone’s story is different and it’s better to share your experiences with the goal to help others, rather than brood about it.

3. “Me time” is critical

Speaking of time, “me time” is critical. I made sure I ate well, slept as long as I needed, and maintained my exercise. My preferred me time was solitude. Favorite hobbies lost time too, but this experience helped me to identify what I valued most. Determine what your me time is and add it to your day.

4. Prepare yourself and your family for emergencies

Emergencies come in all shapes, sizes, and unexpected times. Gather all paperwork and passwords into a central location where a key person has access. Create a backup system of contact people, including friends, family, financial, medical, and all bills or debt. Have a trusted loved one listed as TOD (transfer on death), POA (power of attorney), and all financial accounts. Update yearly—without fail! Accept the hard truth that you will eventually die! Hiding from this won’t help anyone. Tell your loved ones your wishes should something happen to you. How do you want your body, finances, personal belongings, and anything else important to you managed before, during, and after this event?

MSR: How would you advise readers to prepare (financially and emotionally) for that caregiving period of life?

KE: First and foremost, take care of yourself! Perhaps it’s the exercise physiologist in me speaking, but your health is the greatest gift to yourself, those you love, and those who love you. Find your support team. Mine were aunts and uncles whom I would often call to vent, cuss, and cry. Best of all: they listened, loved, and offered anything they could to help. Most often I just needed someone to listen.

For the financial side of preparation, understand that frugal and minimalist are not negative lifestyle habits. After helping my mother downsize 3 times, I realized how much stuff sits idle in our homes. Things we craved at one point eventually gets forgotten and shoved out of sight. Take a hard look at your belongings and separate the stuff from the vitals. It’s tough! Emotions get in the way. In an emergency, however, when you start looking at stuff to sell or get rid of, emotions can exacerbate the situation. Explore frugal and minimalist habits to adopt and simplify life.

MSR: What is your vision for the Managing Midlife site?

KE: Since my FinCon presentation, FIReD is gaining momentum. I am reconnecting with readers and followers to hear their thoughts and stories about family, finance, caregiving, and second acts. I’m enjoying the many interviews and feedback, plus generating lots of articles and information to share with this audience.

I may eventually separate Managing Midlife from KristenEdens.com, but will put most focus into creating helpful articles. With caregiving duties lessened, I have more time to research, interview, and write for Managing Midlife. My next goal is to again be a speaker at FinCon and win the Plutus Award. I will also resurrect my newsletter.

Additionally, I will continue to seek freelance clients. If an opportunity comes my way, I am willing to work full-time (preferably remote) for a local company as this will help slow down the demands on me.

Without a doubt, Managing Midlife will continue as the voice for the 50+ audience. There is so much I can do to help and this is my way to make a difference!

MSR: Thank you for sharing your family’s story, Kristen. I know that caregiving can be one of the most challenging periods of life. Your insights are really practical and encouraging.

Congratulations on being a Plutus Award finalist! I look forward to seeing how your site and community continue to grow.

The post Caregiving and Finances — Sitting Poolside with Kristen Edens appeared first on Semi-Retire Plan.

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