#and because of the LAYERSSSS god the layers. what it says about the admins. and romeo and fred specifically

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petra basically confessing her love for jesse in the admins cabin is so narratively juicy it’s insane. her finally coming clean and gutting herself to say the hard thing, which is that she loves jesse but she doesn’t want to stay. she needs jesse and so she’s been desperately trying to keep him but has also been trying to leave him behind because it’s easier — it’s easier if he doesn’t have a choice, if petra can just decide, because she loves him so much and it’s scary to see what he’ll choose if he’s given an actual choice. what if it’s not her? but what if it is? but then she sees the journal, and she sees romeo, and she realizes what she’s doing, who she’s becoming in her want / need, and it’s an ugly thing, an unfair thing. she loves jesse so much she could kill him. she loves jesse so much that she’s started to grow bitter and she’s started to collect bitter sentiments like weaponry. she’s started to lie, to change into something unrecognizable to him and her, and everything between them hurts all the time. but she doesn’t want to do that, she hates being that person, she hates what they are now, and unlike romeo she can see that and actually stop — she can love jesse and herself enough to stop. so then, beneath the same roof as the admins, right in front of their banners, their symbols, their friendship that is now nothing but an object and a home long buried and repressed, she confesses. and then she accepts whatever answer she’s given through tears and she … lets jesse go. even if she keeps him, she makes a choice to let jesse go, and this choice saves her in the end! it’s that willingness. it’s that desire to make sure jesse is happy, doing whatever he wants to and trusting that he still loves her, and to make sure she’s happy, doing whatever she wants to and trusting he’s not actually leaving, that saves them both. they don’t make the same mistakes as fred and romeo but they were so, so very close and it is so, so symbolic, metaphorical, and beautiful where this conversation takes place and why. the cabin is made anew in this confession and it’s like the place softens a bit, just a smidge, just enough to feel like someplace new but still equally special, right after their embrace.