#and fate brought you to him once again
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tw: memory loss, deception, love at first sight, obsession.
thinking about when satoru was a child and the first time he met you after managing to slip past his clan’s suffocating watch.
satoru had always thought the world he came from was too much. at least, for someone like him — someone who had the misfortune of being born with both the six eyes and limitless cursed techniques. seen as nothing but a weapon.
but you… he remembers the exact day he met you. the exact street he saw you sat at as you hummed to yourself, short legs kicking under the bench as you licked at a blue popsicle that turned your tongue the same color. and then, when you noticed him staring your way — or specifically, at the treat in your hand — you smiled at him. actually smiled — before offering him one from the cooler on that fateful summer day as well as your name.
he was never allowed sweets like this — pure sugar in his perfectly curated diet. he recalls the taste of it on his tongue even now — the taste of something new and wonderful. it had been his favorite ever since. and he recalls the way his tongue had also turned the same shade of blue and he had to hide it the whole time when he was eventually found and brought back to reality, wondering when it’d go away.
but he also wondered about you. how you didn’t give it to him bc of his name or status — but just because. bc you saw that he was any other kid just like you. and he never forgot it. bc you were the first.
sometimes, when satoru could, he’d try and go back to the same spot just to see you — but there was never any trace of you. so life moved on. he didn’t have the time to linger on it much. there was this huge burden thrust upon his shoulders since his birth — his duties. and then later on, there was the school, missions, and then eventually the students after he chose to become a teacher.
but even as the world demanded everything from him, he kept that memory tucked away in his head like a secret he visited every so often — a single moment of peace and warmth in his abnormal world. of what life could’ve been like if he weren’t born gojo satoru.
and then, years later, your name appears on a mission report — low priority, civilian casualty, and memory loss under suspicious conditions. he shouldn’t have even been reading the file — but he recognizes the first name of the girl he’s been thinking about for so long. he really just checked for the hell of it. you’re listed as a non sorcerer. no cursed energy and no connection to the world he is a part of. but when he sees the attached photo — his entire world stops. he’s never forgotten that face.
really, he almost convinces himself to leave it alone. almost. yet, the next moment — he finds himself at your bedside in the hospital, one hand stuffed in his pocket, the other nervously clutching a perfect bouquet of flowers (he wasn’t really sure why he brought them). both the sound of his foot tapping incessantly against the floor and his heart thudding in his chest are too loud in his ears.
the cursed energy from whatever hit you still lingers faintly around you — whatever did this was smart. but satoru is smarter. stronger. he’ll find out who or what took you from him. bc even if you don’t remember him — he remembers everything.
and when your eyes flutter open — those same eyes from years ago (a little older and still holding that same warmth he’s craved all his life and never found in anything else) — you look at him like he’s a stranger. and it guts him.
you ask, voice soft and unsure, “who are you?” and really, he wants to say he’s a sorcerer — wants to explain everything. he should keep you safe from his world, let you know of the dangers that lurk around the corner. but instead, the words tumble out like muscle memory: “i’m gojo satoru. i’m your husband. and you… you’re my wife.”
it is a lie — and yet, the truest thing he’s ever said. bc even if you don’t remember him… he’s been in love with you for half of his life. and fate — twisted and cruel and maybe merciful — has brought you back to him again.
#— soft sighs#like love at first sight#he never forgot about you#and then he sees you again years later#literally an unforgettable love#you’ve always been the one#and fate brought you to him once again#he won’t let you slip away again even if he’ll potentially get in trouble for it later#he won’t regret it#bc he KNOWS in his heart it was always YOU#even if it’s risky and irrational he’d do anything to have you . he goes stupid in the head for YOU only .#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader
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Sometimes I don’t think people understand the point of deterministic time travel stories.
(For the purposes of this post, a deterministic universe refers to a story in which there is only one timeline. Even if time travel exists, the characters cannot go back and change things, so to speak. In a deterministic universe, they would’ve always time-traveled, so the “changes” they attempted were already there, and nothing was altered. Think Interstellar, in which Cooper sends himself to NASA from the future.
By contrast, a branching timeline story would allow changes. Traveling through time assumes a new set of events and/or people who were not present the “first time around,” and so events can be altered, to the point of erasing established history. Think The Butterfly Effect, in which changing the smallest thing balloons out into an entire alternate reality.)
Whenever I hear people discuss a deterministic model of time travel, they seem to be under the impression that those characters are trapped by some nebulous fate or destiny, and that’s why things can’t change. The time-travel mode chosen by the author for the story has locked them into this particular set of events, they’ll posit, and no matter what the characters do, they are literally unable change it.
I couldn’t disagree more!
A deterministic timeline is a trap, to be sure—to us, the audience. The characters are free to make whatever choices they want.
I started thinking about this because of Attack on Titan, how Eren sees a glimpse of himself causing the rumbling from his father’s memories.


So many analyses will claim that’s why Eren started the rumbling later in the story—that from the moment he saw the future, he was somehow locked into that particular course of action. He was destined to kill millions whether he wanted to or not.
But…no. Eren didn’t cause the rumbling because he saw himself do it in the future. He’s not the audience looking in on his own story (not in that way, at least). He isn’t figuring out that there is only one timeline, or that he was fated to cause so much death. He doesn’t even know that he’s in a time loop where everything happens the same way every time!
No! Eren isn’t thinking about time travel physics—which are made-up anyway. Eren isn’t thinking Well I HAVE to do it, since I saw it in Dad’s memories. (Well, he probably does think that. As an excuse.)
Eren makes the choice to start the rumbling because that’s the choice he will always make regardless. That is who he is as a person. It’s a tragic flaw. It’s his character.


I’ve also been thinking about this because of Netflix’s Dark—a time-travel show I heartily recommend. It too has a single timeline, in which many characters meet older—and then younger—versions of themselves, and they pass along information bootstrap-paradox style.


The first time I watched the show, I had this passing thought—how did these characters remember exactly what their older selves said to them, so they could replicate the conversation when they were the older self?
It was a silly question, and the more I watched the show, the more I came to understand: The show is not about ~replicating~ or ~preserving~ events in the timeline. They’re not sacred, as some time-travel stories would have you believe. No, the single timeline never changes because the characters don’t change.
When Jonas, the protagonist of Dark, meets his older self, he can’t believe the shell of a man he’s become. He can’t believe himself capable of saying the things he’s saying, or doing the things he does. He’s not cataloguing the information passed to him so he can one day say it back to his younger self—that’s stupid.


I was caught in a fallacy of bootstrap paradox—how did they know what to say? Where’d those words come from? Well, where all words come from.
Older Jonas is speaking from his heart. He too had believed fervently that he would never become the person he is—but the day has arrived, and now he’s on the other side of the door. He’s saying the words while his younger self is frozen in disbelief. He’s not replicating a conversation he remembers—the words he says are the words he would say regardless. That’s what he’s always said, because that’s who he is.
This little quandary serves as a microcosm for explaining everything about deterministic time-travel. Both Eren and Jonas see themselves in the future doing horrible things. Becoming a version of themselves they would never dream of being.


As much as they tell themselves that’s not me, I would never do that, and even vow to find a way to prevent that future, they both fail in that endeavor. They both experience profound hopelessness and loss, and they eventually give in to their desires and their hopelessness and become the worst, murderous versions of themselves.
And they both, funnily enough, tell themselves and others that it was just fate. It was how things had to be. Inevitable.


This is a lie.
Eren always had the capacity for terrible violence. Jonas was always capable of manipulation and single-minded ruthlessness. Those are their character flaws. The sneak peeks they received of their futures weren’t showing them what they had to do. They made those choices of their own free will. As much as they fought against what they would become, as much as they protested that isn’t me, it was them. And they become those monsters anyway.
It’s only inevitable in the way a tragedy is inevitable.
Tragedies come about because of characters’ choices and flaws—not because the author or the timeline or fate is puppeteering them into these horrible ends. Romeo and Juliet aren’t doomed to die because the opening narration tells us they do. They’re doomed to die because they’re young and impulsive and desperate to escape the cycle of hatred their families perpetuate. It’s a tragedy because they’re scared teenagers and because the feud that drove them together, apart, and then to death was pointless.
It wasn’t inevitable. At any point, they could’ve put down the loaded gun (narratively speaking) and walked away. Romeo didn’t drink the poison because he heard the opening lines about him taking his life. Juliet didn’t watch the rest of the play and go alas, I have no choice, ‘twas foretold. O happy dagger! No! They both made those choices because of who they are as characters and the circumstances they were in.
But because we’re the audience, and we’ve been told the ending, we feel trapped in it. We’re the ones being granted a sneak peek into the future. We watch the story unfold with growing horror, because there are so many outs!
Romeo could have not killed Tybalt. Juliet could have entrusted her letter to a faster rider. They could have just not gotten married after eighteen hours. They could have spilled the secret and asked for help. This entire tragedy seems so preventable—but we’re trapped watching it happen regardless.
So when Eren says he has no choice, he’s not saying that because his vision of the future locked him into that course of action. Eren chooses to start the rumbling because that’s what Eren would do. He tells us himself—his disappointment in the outside world made him want to flatten everything and start anew.


Jonas too chooses to become the worst version of himself because he believes only he can make the world right. He has to—he feels responsible, like he doesn’t have any other choice. He wants to destroy the timeline and his family. He wants to tear it all down, because he can’t let go of the people he loved and lost.


The future does not dictate Eren’s and Jonas’s actions. Eren’s and Jonas’s characters dictate the future.
Maybe seeing themselves do it in the future helped them give permission to themselves to start something so unthinkable—but make no mistake. It was always just them.
(And I don’t say this as a condemnation of either character. We have all had those impulses. Sometimes we just want to tear it all down.)
But getting that glimpse into the future doesn’t absolve them of their choices, either. These two always had another choice. They just chose causing the apocalypse every single time.
(Well, that’s not completely true. Dark and Attack on Titan have different endings—Jonas receives new information that changes his perspective on everything. He learns the truth about the time knot, and that growth and recognition is enough to help him finally make a different choice—one that actually ends the loop. Eren could have made a different choice, too. He just doesn’t.)
Dark sums it up better than I ever could: “Man can do what he wills, but he cannot will what he wills.” In other words: You can do whatever you want, but you cannot make yourself want to do something else. Time travel only highlights that struggle for us.
#attack on titan#dark netflix#eren jaeger#jonas kahnwald#shingeki no kyojin#dark (netflix)#‘if you could go back and do it differently would you?’ not unless i fundamentally change who i am as a person#i’m fun at parties can you tell lol#kylerrambles#mymeta#welcome to my annual meta post where i rant about the thing that no one else seems to understand but is really clear to me#coming back to interstellar down here in the tags bc i just watched it again#cooper sees his daughter in the tesseract and reacts emotionally—pleading with his past self to stay with her; to not leave her#because he cannot stop himself from wanting those lost years with her back#but once he realizes what’s happening and why he’s there he does something different—he sends the coordinates and the quantum data#and it’s not because he realizes he’s in a singular timeline and he’s destined to send those messages#it’s because of his love for murph and his desperation to see her again#he TELLS US HIMSELF THAT’S THE WHOLE POINT#love brought him there#not fate or destiny or time travel physics or aliens#it’s the choices he made and the desires that drove those decisions#anyway! if you have never seen aot or dark 2017 this is your sign go NOW#i would like to thank all the youtubers who inspired this post by incorrectly interpreting time travel mechanics one too many times#time travel is not a portent of doom! it is an instrument of tragedy#it’s like that one post or poem that describes the three laws of tragedy#1) the ending is already set. 2) all your actions are your own and you can walk away at any time.#3) we both know you are never going to do that.
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⩩﹕IN WHICH Phainon finally works up the courage to confess his feelings for you. He’s prepared for the worst, but his overly enthusiastic and hilariously awkward confession turns out to be the very thing that melts your heart.
wc: 2.7k 𐔌 ᯓ fluff + crack, reader is a member of the astral express, english is NOT my first language, probably ooc, i might disappear again after this helpp
It all started with a simple glance. The moment you, Caelus, and Dan Heng arrived at Amphoreus and were saved by him, something shifted. He couldn’t help but take notice of you the instant your eyes met. Was it the way you stood your ground against the Strife Titan’s soldier minions? The steady strength in how you cared for your comrades? Or perhaps it was just you, intriguing in a way he couldn’t quite place.
The first time Phainon spoke to you, he found himself trying his best to impress you with his words. Were you the type to be drawn to intelligent people? The kind who could be charmed by facts, theories, or well-timed historical references? He wasn’t sure, but he wanted to find out. So he made it his mission to impress you with what he knew, slipping little details into conversation about Amphoreus’s ancient architecture, the myths behind its sky, or the lesser-known mechanics. His voice would drop to soft, thoughtful tones whenever you were near, as if every word he spoke was carefully chosen just for you.
Tribbie noticed it too. There was a subtle difference in Phainon’s voice whenever he spoke to you. It carried a softness, something warmer, something more genuine than the way he spoke to anyone else. On the way to Okhema, Tribbie couldn’t help but sneak glances at the two of you, quietly cheering for Phainon in her head. Even Dan Heng, ever observant, seemed to sense the way Phainon’s attention lingered on you a little longer than it should.
"Have you eaten anything yet?" Phainon asked, his gaze settling on you.
Fate must have been on his side when he asked if you wanted to ride the dromas with him, and you agreed, especially since Caelus and Dan Heng were already sharing one.
"I haven't, actually," you replied, your eyes drifting over the unfamiliar surroundings, taking everything in.
"Then once we reach the city gates, we can go eat. My treat, of course!" he said, his voice laced with excitement.
You could almost imagine a pair of puppy ears and a wagging tail behind him as he spoke, the image bringing a chuckle out of you.
"Sure, I'd like that," you replied, accepting his offer with a warm smile.
Because of the battle against Nikador, the little ‘date’ Phainon had planned was postponed. A week had already passed.
Now, Phainon stood outside the room you shared with Caelus and Dan Heng, quietly muttering to himself as he worked up the courage to knock. He kept rehearsing the words in his head, wondering how he should invite you to eat. Was he always this nervous? Or was it only like this when it came to you?
Trying to steady his nerves, Phainon took a deep breath and knocked on the door, his hand hesitating for just a second.
There was a long pause before a voice called out, "I’ll get it."
The door creaked open, slow and unhurried, and Phainon felt his heart climb all the way to his throat. For a moment, he was sure it would burst out of his chest.
But when the door finally opened, it wasn’t you standing there — it was Dan Heng, his expression calm but curious. The sight brought Phainon a small wave of relief, his tense shoulders relaxing slightly. If it had been you, he swore he might have collapsed right then and there.
Dan Heng raised an eyebrow, studying him for a second longer than usual. "Looking for someone?" he asked, though the knowing tone in his voice suggested he already had the answer.
Phainon cleared his throat, trying to piece together his scattered thoughts. "Are they here?"
Dan Heng glanced over his shoulder toward the room before stepping aside. "They’re inside. I’ll call them."
As Dan Heng turned to call your name, Phainon felt his heart pick up speed all over again. No matter how much he tried to prepare himself, it seemed that just the thought of seeing you was enough to stir something deep in his chest.
You heard Dan Heng call your name from inside the room, his tone as calm as ever. At that moment, you and Caelus were in the middle of teasing each other over some silly in-joke, the kind that only the two of you seemed to find funny. He nudged your shoulder with a grin, and you rolled your eyes playfully before excusing yourself.
As you stepped toward the door, still smiling faintly from the banter, Phainon felt his breath catch in his throat. Even though he had spent a whole week trying to find the right words, now that you were standing in front of him, his mind went completely blank.
You tilted your head slightly, noticing the way his gaze flickered away for just a moment. "Hey," you greeted, your voice light and easy, unaware of how much weight the simple word carried for him.
Phainon rubbed the back of his neck, forcing out the words he had practiced so many times. "About the meal... I was wondering if you're still up for it. I mean, if you're free, of course."
There was a pause, short but enough for Phainon’s heart to hammer against his chest all over again as he waited for your reply.
“Oh! I almost forgot!” you said, a small spark of realization flickering across your face. You looked at him with an apologetic smile, your tone light but warm. "Yeah, I'd like that."
Phainon felt the tension in his chest ease, his lips pulling into a bright, genuine smile. Without wasting another second, you turned your head back toward the room.
“I’m heading out with Phainon,” you called out, making sure both Caelus and Dan Heng could hear. Caelus gave you a playful wave from where he sat, and Dan Heng gave a small nod, his usual calm expression softening just a little.
Once you had said your goodbyes, you stepped out of the room and walked alongside Phainon. His steps felt lighter, and the shy glance he gave you couldn’t quite hide the excitement flickering behind his eyes.
“Snowy!” Tribbie, Trianne, and Trinnon all called out in unison.
There stood Phainon, his face redder than Mydei’s robe.
“What happened, Lord Phainon?” Castorice asked, a polite smile resting on her face.
Before Phainon could even try to answer, the sound of armor echoed through the bathhouse as Mydei strolled in, adjusting his gloves. His expression held the usual sharp edge of someone who knew far more than he let on.
“Oh, I can answer that,” Mydei said, his tone light and teasing. He stopped just a few steps away from the group, crossing his arms. “Deliverer here is fresh from a little outing, aren’t you?”
Phainon’s shoulders stiffened as Mydei glanced his way, that playful glint dancing in his eyes.
“Such an adorable sight too. Sharing a meal, walking side by side, and that little moment where he almost looked like he could steal the whole sky with one smile.” Mydei paused, clearly savoring the attention of the room. “Who knew the Deliverer had it in him?”
The room went silent for a moment, all eyes on Phainon, whose face somehow managed to burn even hotter.
Phainon opened his mouth to speak, maybe to deny it or maybe to change the subject, but all that came out was a strangled, “I—”
“Didn’t expect that, huh?” Trianne whispered to Tribbie.
Phainon turned away, covering his mouth with one hand in a poor attempt to hide the shade his cheeks had turned. He could still hear Mydei humming behind him, clearly enjoying himself.
His thoughts flickered back to just a short while ago. After their meal, the walk back had been warm, soft, and a little awkward, but in a good way.
“You didn’t have to walk me back, you know,” you had said, glancing at him from the corner of your eye as the two of you walked along the path leading to your room. The sky above Amphoreus was still the same as ever.
“I wanted to,” Phainon replied, not quite looking at you. “It’s only right to make sure you got back safely.”
You had chuckled at that, a quiet, content sound.
When you reached the door, he lingered for just a second longer than necessary, and you noticed.
“I’ll see you soon?” you asked.
Phainon nodded quickly, trying to look composed even as he backed away. “Y-yeah. Definitely.”
The memory dissolved the moment Mydei spoke.
“Speaking of,” Mydei said with a smirk, glancing toward the lift. “Look who decided to join us.”
Phainon turned around and froze.
There you were, walking in alongside Dan Heng and Caelus, your eyes scanning the room. Dan Heng gave a polite nod to the group, while Caelus stretched his arms up with a dramatic sigh.
“Apologies, we’re late,” Dan Heng said. “Aglaea asked us to come too.”
Phainon blinked, his mind short-circuiting. “Oh. You’re... here too?”
You tilted your head slightly, amused. “Didn’t expect us?”
“I, uh, well, I just—” He rubbed the back of his neck, laughing nervously. “I thought you’d be resting. After, y’know, earlier.”
Caelus narrowed his eyes in mock suspicion. “Why does that sound suspicious?”
Mydei let out a low hum. “It was suspicious.”
Tribbie giggled behind her hand, and Trianne barely suppressed a laugh.
You glanced at Phainon, your expression unreadable for just a moment, then a small smile tugged at the corners of your lips. “You didn’t tell anyone about the part where you almost tripped over a bench, right?”
Phainon let out a groan, covering his face as the others erupted into laughter. “Please don’t.”
The market was buzzing with chatter, and the air smelled faintly of roasted nuts and fresh bread. Tribbie was holding a small pouch of star-shaped candies, but her focus was far from the snacks.
“So…” she began, tugging lightly at your sleeve as you walked. “You’ve been spending a lot of time with Phainon lately.”
You glanced down at her, amused. “Have I?”
Tribbie grinned up at you, swinging her arm slightly. “Don’t pretend! He’s always sticking close to you — and I’ve seen the way you smile at him too.”
You paused, pretending to study one of the stall’s trinkets, though the question sat warmly in your chest. After a short moment, you finally answered.
“I guess he is interesting,” you admitted. “He’s smart, funny... and honestly, kind of charming when he isn’t trying so hard.”
Tribbie’s eyes sparkled with curiosity, clearly delighted by your answer. “And handsome?” she asked, her voice full of playful innocence.
A soft laugh escaped you. “Yeah, that too.”
Tribbie let out a happy little giggle, skipping beside you as the two of you continued walking. “I knew it! I knew you thought so.”
Tribbie, still beaming from your little confession, skipped ahead a few steps before turning on her heel to face you, walking backward with the confidence only a child could manage.
“You should tell him, you know!” she chirped, her voice light as the breeze. “I bet he’d be super happy.”
You shook your head, amused at her boldness. “It’s not that easy, Tribbie.”
She tilted her head, puzzled. “Why not? Grown-ups always make things more complicated.”
Before you could answer, your phone buzzed softly in your pocket. You pulled it out and saw a message from Dan Heng:
Dan Heng: Caelus is getting hungry. You heading back soon?
You smiled to yourself, typing a quick reply.
You: On my way! Tribbie was stalling me.
Sliding your phone back into your pocket, you turned to Tribbie. “Come on,” you said, gently taking her hand to guide her away from the crowd. “I need to head back before Caelus starts eating my secret snacks.”
Tribbie skipped along beside you, humming happily under her breath. But even as you walked, your thoughts lingered on Phainon — the way his voice softened whenever he spoke to you, the way his nervous smiles felt so genuine, and how his whole demeanor seemed to ease the moment you were near.
Unspoken feelings hung in the air, light but impossible to ignore, and you couldn’t help but wonder if, somewhere, Phainon was thinking about you too.
The sun hung high in the sky as you and Phainon found yourselves standing by a quiet corner of the bustling marketplace, far from the noise of the crowd. The moment felt like it was meant to be, but Phainon looked a bit too tense for it to be anything “casual.”
He shifted on his feet, clearly unsure how to start. You raised an eyebrow at him. “You alright?”
Phainon’s face turned a little pink, and he cleared his throat awkwardly. “Uh… so... you know how we’ve been spending a lot of time together lately?”
You nodded, trying to keep a straight face as you could already sense where this was going. “Yeah, I think I’ve noticed.”
“I’ve been thinking... a lot.” Phainon scratched his head nervously. “And I just... I need to say this before my brain explodes. It’s important.”
You couldn’t help but chuckle at his serious tone, though you kept it to a smile so as not to interrupt his flow. “Alright, lay it on me.”
He took a deep breath, staring at you like you were the most important thing in the world, even if his face was all sorts of red. “Okay, here goes... I like you. Like, a lot. And I’m not talking about, like, ‘Oh, I like you as a friend’ type of liking you. I mean, I like you like you. Like, if liking you was a sport, I’d be the world champion. That’s how much I like you.”
You blinked, trying to suppress your laughter. “Phainon, are you... are you trying to tell me you have a crush on me?”
He nodded vigorously, still rambling. “Yes! But it’s not just a regular crush, okay? It’s like... the kind where I’d write you a song if I knew how to play an instrument. Or maybe I’d bake you cookies, but only if I had a recipe. Which I don’t. But, you know, the point is — I like you. A lot. And I can’t keep pretending that I don’t. So there, I said it.”
There was a brief silence, and you stared at him, blinking slowly, trying to make sense of his very enthusiastic confession. Then, you burst out laughing.
Phainon’s eyes widened, his face going even redder. “Wait, wait! Is that—was that bad? Did I mess it up? I can try again—”
You waved your hands, still chuckling. “No, no! It’s just... I wasn’t expecting you to be this nervous about it!”
Phainon gave a weak laugh, scratching his head again. “Well, it’s not every day I tell someone I like them, you know? I mean, this is serious stuff. It’s like, ‘here’s my heart, don’t drop it’ kind of serious.”
You put a hand on your chest dramatically. “Oh, don’t worry, I’m not gonna drop your heart. I mean, you’re not that bad. You did make me laugh.”
Phainon sighed in relief, a little grin appearing on his face. “Okay, so... you’re not running away screaming, right?”
You grinned. “Nah. But only because you said it in such a funny way. You’re lucky I find that charming.”
Phainon blinked. “Really? You find me charming?”
“Sure,” you said with a teasing smile. “For a world champion overthinker.”
His grin grew even wider as he nudged you playfully. “Well, if you ever need a partner in crime for overthinking things, you know where to find me.”
You laughed again, shaking your head. “I think you’ve already got me.”
Phainon blinked, then broke into a big smile. “Wait, did you just say yes?”
You gave him a wink. “Maybe I did. But you still owe me those cookies.”
“Deal!” he said, a little too enthusiastically. “I’ll start baking immediately... once I find a recipe.”
#𐔌 ᯓ (writes)#phainon#hsr x y/n#hsr x reader#hsr x gn reader#hsr x gender neutral reader#hsr x you#hsr#hsr mydei#honkai star rail#amphoreus#phainon x reader#phainon hsr#phainon x you#phainon honkai star rail#phainon x y/n#mydei hsr#castorice hsr#caelus hsr#hsr dan heng#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail x gender neutral reader#honkai star rail x gn reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr fluff
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Good afternoon today I am thinking about how Calypso hears Odysseus say Penelope's name before she even learns what his name is. She hears “Penelope” before she ever hears “Odysseus.”
And so do we.
In the opening lines of the musical, Odysseus rallies his men by invoking home: “Think of your wives and your children.” We are told so early and so clearly that the impulse that drives him, long before we even know him by name, is love, home, and memory. When the choir asks “What do you fight for?” he first answers: “Penelope.” And then he says it again. And when the prophet Tiresias speaks, when Eurylochus confronts him, when Circe questions his heart, when the gods themselves threaten him and debate his fate, it is always Penelope whose name rises, it is always his wife who is consistenly brought up. Penelope, whose presence is invoked in absence. Penelope, who defines every move he makes.
We learn who his wife is long before he utters his own name, which he only ever does once, in the only saga she's not mentioned. The only time he claims his name aloud is the one time he is wholly severed from her, textually and thematically. Every other chapter of this story, every other trial he endures, echoes with her name. Except this one. Penelope does not enter that cave. Her absence is deafening, and the one time he utters his name instead of hers, it is this exact same act that brings the storm, Poseidon's fury, the years added to their journey. The moment he lets go of her is the moment he is torn from her.
Her name is a refrain in the mouths of gods and monsters, a tether through temptation and torment. If you strip her from the story, you do not simply lose a love interest. You lose the anchor. You lose the tension. You lose the meaning behind every choice Odysseus makes, and every cost he bears.
She is not an afterthought. She is with him from the very beginning and she's the one with him at the very end. She is the centre of the story.
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track 10 — mark grayson (invincible) !



⟢ synopsis. you totally don't have a thing for mark, that would be crazy ... unless
⟢ contains. 18+, mark grayson x fem!reader, nsfw, oral (m & f receiving), cunnilingus. mark is kinda subby, friends with benefits but they like each other, reader is so down bad it's embarassing, and mark isn't any better, gets a little nasty when it comes to cum, mark is a proud moaner, mentions of porn, both mark and reader are lowkey pervs.
⟢ wc: 15k+
⟢ author’s note. mark is an eater, sue me. there's stupid jokes thrown in here, just a long written work of me pushing the casual sex with mark idea. i also like the idea of having an alien boyfriend and making mark more alien than human. a lot of it was inspired by this work from ao3!
You’re such a pervert.
At least, that’s what Mark and William would call you if they saw the way your eyes trailed, lingered, on the way fingers slipped into the holes of bowling balls, your gaze locked on the flex of forearm muscle tightening beneath warm, sandy skin. Veins rising just under the surface. The smooth way wrists rolled as they brought the ball up, perfectly casual, totally unaware.
You exhaled slowly through your nose. The warmth in your stomach was beginning to simmer into something heavier, something you refused to name in the middle of a public bowling alley, under neon lights and the scent of cheap nachos.
Mark would turn scarlet if he caught you. You knew the exact look—eyebrows shooting up, eyes wide and blinking, stammering over his own breath like a shy bastard. And William? God, he’d never let you live it down. He’d smirk like the devil himself, a wicked grin twisting on his face as he realized you’re not so different from him, seconds away from pointing across the lane with an audible gasp like he’s scandalized.
You huffed and slouched deeper into the worn leather seat, folding your arms across your chest like it might shield you from the shame of your own libido. Or at least from the sight of Mark, now lining up his shot.
Why did you even agree to this again?
Third-wheeling William and Rick’s bowling date for the millionth time had officially become the sad little cherry on top of your tragic sundae. You were no longer just the single friend. You were the perpetually single friend. The “don’t worry, you’ll find someone eventually” friend. It made you want to tear your hair out of your head.
Worse still was when Amber and her new boyfriend showed up. You’d run out of excuses not to come by then—tried “midterms,” “period,” even “funeral” once, which William did not find funny. (You still do.)
Maybe that was an exaggeration because you know how competitive William and Amber get so there wouldn’t be much love to go around if the game was close, but still!
And maybe it wasn’t always like this. Maybe they didn’t completely leave you out. They included you in the group cheers, the trash talk, and even the occasional victory dance when one of you got a lucky strike. You weren’t invisible. Just… orbiting. A little too aware of the way everyone else had someone to orbit with.
But tonight was different.
Because Mark Grayson was here.
You hadn’t expected it—had already accepted your fate as the designated third wheel, again—but when William pulled up and you opened the car door, there he was. Sitting in the back seat. Tugging at the sleeves of his sweater. That stupid, kinda cute grin on his face when he saw the shock on yours.
Mark Grayson. The best friend turned part-time cryptid. A guy you maybe saw once every other week if the planets aligned and there wasn’t a kaiju climbing out of Lake Michigan. These days, he showed up in the group chat typing out things like “Sorry I’ve been MIA, was in space lol” or “brb gotta swim in a volcano for endurance training :(” like it was completely normal and not the kind of thing that made you feel a weird cocktail of secondhand stress and... butterflies.
He was still the same guy who sent you videos of raccoons screaming into bird feeders at 2 a.m. Still remembered to say “hi” to your mom over text. Still promised you he wasn’t dead every now and then. But sitting beside him in the car—seeing his knee bouncing, his jaw shifting with a soft grin like nothing had changed—it hit you just how much had.
He looked… older. And maybe you looked older too but it was like he’d seen things and hadn’t told anyone. His eyes had that faraway shine he got when he was lost in thought, and even with the quiet hum of William and Rick’s shitty playlist and the greasy scent of drive-thru fries between you all, you could feel the shift in the air. A little quieter. A little heavier.
You had to play it cool. Pretend your entire body hadn’t immediately started sparking like faulty wiring the second he said your name and nudged your knee with his. You had to stop smiling so hard that your cheeks hurt.
You had to act like this was any other night. Like he wasn’t the reason your stomach had butterflies and your thighs had opinions.
You leaned your head against the window, hiding your face, hoping the dark would swallow the flush climbing your neck. You muttered something sarcastic about “the prodigal son returning,” and Mark just chuckled, that same warm, dorky sound that always made your stomach twist.
He said, “You act like I’ve been gone for five years. It’s only been, like, two weeks.”
You gave him a flat look. “You missed two birthdays, Mark.”
He winced. “Okay, technically I was there for William’s. You just couldn’t see me.”
“Yeah,” William piped up from the front seat, smirking. “Because you were in orbit.”
Mark shrugged with a guilty laugh and you were smiling the whole car ride.
Not because he was saying anything particularly funny—though he did, at one point, launch into a truly terrible pun about black holes and bowling balls—but just because he was there. And you wouldn’t have to sit alone all night, nursing a soda while Rick and William played footsie over the ball return.
By the time you all reached the bowling alley, cheap neon lights flickering overhead, you were already white-knuckling it through the evening. The floors stuck just a little to your soles, gum-slick and soda-stained, the way only old alleys could be. It felt like someone turned the heater up to just uncomfortable, and you were nearly sweating through your shirt despite the chill of your drink between your hands.
You’re trying your best not to blare your teeth because neither Rick nor Mark would understand how badly you need to sink them into something. And the last thing you need is William playing Cupid again. If he catches even a whiff of this (and he will, the man could sniff out sexual frustration like a fucking bloodhound) you’ll spend the rest of the night dodging his attempts to set you up with someone’s cousin. Or sibling. Or roommate. Or ex.
So instead, you cross your legs, pressing your thighs together like a lifeline, grateful for the thick fabric of your jeans creating friction, if nothing else. You chew furiously on the nachos Rick ordered for the table, salt and fake cheese mixing with the lingering taste of your own desperation, pretending to be invested in the score.
You tried to have a little shame with the way you were staring—really, you tried. But your casual glances across the lanes kept narrowing, funnelling, zeroing in on one person. And the way Mark moved tonight was ridiculous.
You were practically biting your fist, hating how much you loved the way his shoulders shifted under that stupid sweater—the very same one he used to wear in high school. Still threadbare in places. Still soft-looking. Still familiar. Except now, it clung a little tighter to the broader frame he’d grown into, hugging his chest and upper arms like a secret he hadn’t meant to keep from you.
You don’t even think that yellow button-up he used to pair it with would fit anymore. Not unless he wanted to pop a few buttons and really give you something to talk about in therapy.
Mark had filled out in ways you didn’t quite expect—broader shoulders, a thicker chest, and maybe, just maybe, he’d gotten taller too. It was subtle at first, the kind of change that didn’t register until he handed you his old, beloved Seance Dog t-shirt one afternoon like it was nothing. You remembered how the sleeves used to sag on him, how the shirt had always hung a little loose, and yet it had fit obscenely tight the last time he wore it. The fabric had clung to his torso like a second skin, sleeves straining around his biceps, the hem inching up every time he moved, flashing bare slivers of skin that had no right being that distracting.
You still kept that shirt. Obviously. You told yourself it was sentimental value.
But he looked good tonight. Unfairly so. Maybe he’d always looked good and you were just blind before. Or maybe being away from him for so long had cracked something wide open. Or, worst-case scenario: your hormones were finally staging a mutiny.
Mark kept adjusting the sleeves of his sweater, rolling them up to his elbows like he didn’t know what he was doing. As if the sight of his forearms—tan and veined, the muscles shifting under his skin—wasn’t actively short-circuiting your brain.
You tried to be normal about the way you watched him walk over to the ball return, fingers ghosting across the slick surfaces like he was reading them in braille. You watched his hand pause on the biggest ball available, the one no one else bothered with, and he lifted it like it was made of foam. You felt your pulse stutter at the way his fingers—pointer, middle, thumb—slid into the holes like they belonged there, like they knew what they were doing. His forearm flexed, slow and subtle, and something deep in your stomach clenched in a way that made you feel both ashamed and violently alive.
His skin barely shifted from the strain. Just a soft pull. A ripple. The gentlest whisper of effort. But you admired it all the same. The slight dip of muscle at his elbow. The veins running up his arm. The quiet strength of his grip.
You tried not to imagine Mark’s hands on your hips. Or in your hair. Or in your mouth. Or worse—inside you. You tried not to think about what kind of sounds he might make. Was he a moaner or does he just groan? Would he whimper? Would he say your name like it meant something?
Would Amber tell you if you asked her?
She probably would. She’d smirk, hand you a drink, and tell you to stop being a pussy and go find out yourself.
You shift in your seat again, squeezing your thighs tighter, desperate for relief, for control, for anything other than this maddening ache.
Mark throws the ball. It gutters. Again.
He looks back at you immediately, face scrunching like he’s trying to play it off, but you catch the flicker of embarrassment behind it. You give him two exaggerated thumbs up, all supportive sarcasm. He returns the gesture with just as much sass, which makes you laugh, which makes your heart thump, which makes everything worse.
God, he really does hate bowling. He’s terrible at it. And somehow that only makes you want him more.
If you had a dick, you’re sure you’d be dealing with a painfully obvious hard-on by now. Instead, you’re left to wonder how wet your jeans are getting and whether the people around you will just assume your nipples are hard from the cold. (You wore a bra tonight. Thank God for small mercies.)
You shouldn't be thinking about one of your friends like this. Not someone you barely get to see anymore. You don’t want to ruin this with whatever’s going on in your head. But it’s too late, isn’t it? You’re already undressing him in your mind, mouth full of nachos, pupils blown wide.
You take another bite, chewing mindlessly, trying to remember when exactly this started. When Mark became more than just your high school buddy. When the sight of him made your lungs forget how to work. When you stopped seeing him as just Mark—and started seeing him as something else. Someone else. Someone you wanted.
“I suck.”
You hear Mark huff as he comes back from the floor. His frown is apologetic and self-deprecating as he drags his feet.
“And blow.” William snickers, rising from his spot next to Rick for his turn. His teasing tone is sharp and playful, drawing laughter from you and Rick alike.
“Fuck off,” Mark retorts, his irritation softening the moment—and then, like it’s nothing, like it’s the most natural thing in the world, Mark makes his way to you. And it’s stupid, the way your breath stills just a little. Just a second.
His face shifts when he gets close, softer now. “Hey,” he says, with that quiet little smile of his.
“Hi.” You try not to sound breathless.
“I suck at bowling,” he says again, collapsing into the seat beside you.
Now, being close enough to catch even the faintest trace of his cologne—the familiar scent that you and Debbie painstakingly chose for his birthday last year. You remember that bottle, both of you debating over what “smelled like Mark.” This one had lingered on your coat for days after he hugged you once. Reminds you that some parts of him have not changed at all.
Mark reaches for the biggest nacho on the plate, of course, he does, and he ignores your reminder that the centre nacho was meant to be saved for last.
“Too late,” he says, crunching into it, unbothered.
Your eyes dart over to the flickering scoreboard. There, Mid-game Mark is branded with a lowly score of twenty-five—a number so absurd it makes you laugh at his expense.
“Jesus,” you snort, trying to hide your smile behind your hand. “How does that even happen? I thought you had powers or something.”
“Doesn’t matter if I do. William knows I’m shit at bowling.”
That makes you smile, and you tease, “And you’re still here.”
“Where else would I be?” Mark shrugs, his tone light, but then he adds, “Besides, I’ve missed you.”
Your stomach does a sharp little flip.
“Have you?” You arch an eyebrow.
“Yeah,” he says, without hesitation. His eyes don’t leave yours.
Then Rick laughs at something William shouts from the lane, and Mark seems to remember where he is. The spell breaks. He coughs, awkwardly. “I mean—I’ve missed all of you guys. Obviously.”
“Obviously,” you echo, smiling despite yourself.
And god, maybe it’s not a big deal. Maybe it’s nothing. But maybe it’s also everything. Like the way he always used to wait for you to catch up in the hallways. Like how he still texts you song lyrics when he can’t sleep. Like how he sat next to you without even asking.
To try to muster up all your courage, hoping you do not sound like a loser.
“If you’ve missed me so much,” you tease, bumping your knee against his, “we could’ve just gone out ourselves, you know. I wouldn’t make you suffer like this.”
Mark looks at you then. Really looks at you.
“Are you free tomorrow by any chance?”
Your heart stutters. You pretend not to notice. “I don’t know.”
His face falls, just a bit. The corners of his mouth twitch like maybe he’s bracing for a punch. “Seriously?”
You shrug with a stupid grin that threatens to betray every thought swirling beneath the surface, and you almost feel bad—but not really. “I might have to move a few things around. Very demanding schedule, you know.”
“Right,” he says, eyes flicking upward in that way you remember so well, a glint of playful hope that sends your stomach into a flip. “If you push doom scrolling till after seven, do you think we could get lunch and boba? There’s a new store that opened up near my place.”
You pretend to think, tapping your chin. “That might work.”
“My treat.”
“Would you look at that,” you breathe, smiling so wide it aches. “My entire day just cleared up.”
He grins, “Uh-huh. Cheap ass.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “What was that?”
“I don’t know,” Mark says with a shrug that’s far too casual to be innocent, looking anywhere but at you. “Must’ve been the wind.”
It takes everything in you not to laugh. God, you’re hopeless. Every time he looks at you like that—like there’s some inside joke only the two of you share—it hits something soft and dangerous inside your chest. It shouldn’t feel this personal. He’s always like this with you. Right?
Before you can fire back something smug or clever, William calls your name like he’s been waiting for the perfect moment to interrupt. You roll your eyes but the irritation’s fake—your bark never really had any bite when it came to Mark, not when he looks at you like that. Not when he smells like that. Not when you’re sitting so close, you’re painfully aware of just how wet your panties are from… from what? A smile? A little eye contact? Pathetic.
Still, you’re smiling like an idiot when you hop off the bench and head to the lane. The energy in your chest is all fizzy and too much, too fast, but you try to channel it into something, anything else.
You take the ball and accidentally hit a strike. A perfect one.
You blink. “Holy shit.”
Laughter and chaos erupt behind you, and Mark shouts, “You fucking cheated!”
────────────
You don’t have a crush on Mark. You really don’t.
Because if you did, you probably would’ve told Amber not to go out with him after she asked if you were cool with it.
If you had a thing for Mark, you definitely would’ve wallowed in self-pity with your sad Spotify playlist and your arms elbow-deep in a bag of chips that one night he posted a photo with Eve in the middle of the jungle or wherever.
If you liked Mark—even a little bit—you probably would've pulled your hair out strand by strand when you found out he started dating Eve for real.
But that didn’t happen. So. You don’t have a crush on him. Obviously.
Totally.
And whatever weird, fluttery, buzzy feeling that’s dancing through your chest and your stomach right now? It’s definitely just the boba. Or something they put in the syrup. Maybe the taro’s gone off. Definitely not the way Mark’s eyes crinkle when he’s smiling at you. Not the way he showed up to your little lunch date(?) wearing that stupid shirt you always teased him for owning five of. Or how he paid without even asking, the casual kind of chivalry that makes your heart thud and your brain scream (even if he already told you it was his treat).
Your relationship with Mark has never been anything extraordinary. It’s… simple.
As simple as being friends with a half-alien can be.
You’ve always loved Mark’s company, though. You love the way he talks about all the dorky, nerdy shit that made him a bit of a loner in high school—the same stuff he still brings up now with zero shame. You like listening to him talk about it, even when you don’t understand half the words. Even when you know you’ll never, ever watch that weird Super Dog cartoon he keeps insisting would change your life. Not until he finally watches that limited-run K-drama you’ve been begging him to get through since last summer, anyway.
But anyway, you enjoy those moments you get with Mark—even if they’re rare. You enjoy spending time with him, catching up, listening to his stories, and then trying to make your own mundane ones sound even half as cool. You know you’ll never top the time he went to Mars. That story lives in a league of its own. But you still love the way his voice softens when he talks about spending a quiet afternoon with his mom, or the way he lights up when Oliver does something new—like picking up skateboarding or learning a dumb trick that’s only impressive because he’s small and determined.
Mark tends to set the bar pretty high without even trying.
And not just with stories. With everything. With how he lives, how he treats people. Without ever meaning to, Mark’s somehow managed to ruin dating for you. He’s set your standards insanely high. You’ve caught yourself comparing people to him—his kindness, his loyalty, his dumb sense of humour. You still wince when you remember William’s reaction to the last guy you matched with on Tinder.
“He’s like… a whiter version of Mark.”
You haven’t opened Tinder since.
“You okay?”
Mark’s voice cuts through your spiral, pulling you back. You blink like you’ve just come up for air.
“Sorry, yeah,” you say too quickly, shifting in your seat like that might shake the embarrassment off. You meet his eye for just a second—he’s already looking at you, head tilted, brows pulled together in quiet concern.
Your fingers tighten around your cup, the condensation beading under your skin. It’s cold. Which is helpful. Because you’re warm. Too warm. For no good reason. Definitely not because of how intently he’s looking at you, like he’s trying to read between your pauses.
You clear your throat. “Wait—so Cecil had you training on the moon?”
There’s a tiny hitch in his rhythm, just for a beat. You think he might’ve been expecting you to actually answer him, to say what’s on your mind. But Mark lets it slide. He shifts in his seat a little and starts talking again, picking up the thread of his story like it’s no big deal.
And you try to listen. You do.
You don’t get many chances like this—just you and him, no one else around. No William. No supervillain attack halfway through a sentence. Just… a booth, a couple of half-finished drinks, and him.
You want to soak up every second. But he makes it so damn hard for you.
You catch bits of the story—something about the new suit being way more annoying to get on, something else about Oliver cracking the concrete trying to ollie down the front steps—but you’re barely keeping up. Your brain is foggy and not in a cute, dreamy way. You’re kind of just… watching him.
The way he talks with his hands. The way he smiles halfway through a sentence, like he already knows the punchline’s only funny to him but he’s gonna say it anyway. The way he leans in a little when he’s excited, like he’s trying to make you feel the moment with him.
You laugh when he laughs, even if you miss the joke.
Because as long as he keeps talking, you don’t have to say anything.
You just get to sit there. And pretend like this is enough.
The thing was, Mark has always technically been an attractive guy. Tall, kind of annoyingly fit, with that sharp jawline that only got better with age. Charming in a way he didn’t even realize. At least you’d always known it. But you never thought you’d live to see the day (or the week… okay, the past few months—maybe even the year) where you’d start to see him that way.
Like, really see him. In that oh no kind of way.
You’d brushed it off for a while—blamed it on nostalgia, on hormones, on whatever. But bowling last night had been a bit of a breaking point. Something about the sleeves pushed up his forearms, the way he leaned over to aim, that boyish little grin when he finally knocked a pin down—it undid you. And you hadn’t exactly been subtle about the way you were gawking.
Still, it didn’t really hit you until this morning. When you woke up a little dazed, sheets tangled between your legs, and the ghost of a dream clinging to your skin. His voice had echoed in your head, low and warm and familiar. His touch—blurry, but undeniably his—lingered along your shoulder, your back. Your neck.
You’d jolted up like someone caught you.
So. Yeah. Maybe you had the hots for your best friend. Maybe your body wanted something more than side hugs and occasional shoulder touches and the familiar comfort of leaning into him during movies. But that didn’t mean you had a crush or anything. Right?
…Right.
So what if you’d taken a little longer getting ready today? Or if you picked a nicer perfume—the one you usually saved for special occasions—and spritzed a little extra behind your ears, just in case. Not because of him. Just… because. And if you fixed your hair in the mirror three separate times before leaving? Totally normal.
You tell yourself it doesn’t mean anything.
Except it’s really hard to hold onto that thought when he’s sitting across from you looking like that.
His hair’s messier than usual, the curls a little looser like he ran his fingers through it instead of brushing it out. His light blue shirt clings in all the right places and you’re seriously starting to wonder if any of his clothes still fit him properly or if he just enjoys tormenting you. His biceps look like they’re threatening the seams and you hate how aware of it you are.
He's rambling about something now—probably a mission, or a weird encounter with a reporter who keeps calling him the “hot one.” He laughs, wide and open-mouthed, and you try to focus on his words but you’re too busy watching how his lips move. How easily that laugh bubbles out of him. How pretty his eyes are when they squint at you like this, catching you staring.
You should say something. Anything.
“You’re, uh—” you blurt out, then immediately regret it. He glances up, curious. You clear your throat and gesture vaguely at him. “You look nice. That’s a good shirt on you.”
He blinks. “Oh. Thanks,” he says, smiling like it’s no big deal, but his ears go pink. “Didn’t even realize—kind of just threw it on this morning.”
Of course he did. Of course he looks like this with zero effort. Meanwhile, you were practically putting on war paint to get your eyeliner even.
“It’s a good colour on you,” you add, a little quieter. Your fingers pick at the sleeve of your own jacket, trying to act like you’re not slowly disintegrating under the weight of your own thoughts.
There’s a beat. You feel his gaze again—steadier this time. Like he’s trying to see through the cracks.
“You got all dressed up too,” he says casually, elbow on the table, chin resting on his palm. “Special occasion?”
You scoff. “What, like I can’t look decent unless it’s for something?”
“I mean,” he teases, lips twitching, “you’re usually in sweats when we hang out.”
“That’s because you’ve seen me in every stage of human degeneration. There’s no mystery left.”
Mark laughs, deep and genuine. “There’s still a little mystery.”
You’re not going to ask what he means. You’re not.
Instead, you take a sip of your drink to hide the flush in your cheeks. You focus on the way the cold clings to your fingers, grounding you. Because if you let yourself keep staring, you’re going to do something stupid. Like, ask him if he wants to come back to yours. Or kiss him right here across the table.
You sneak another glance at him. He’s already looking at you. Again.
You want him so bad it’s physically painful.
And yeah, sure—maybe you’ve imagined what it’d be like if you were just a little bit closer. Not just physically. Closer in a way that means good morning kisses and bad jokes whispered into collarbones and brushing your teeth side by side, sleep-crinkled eyes and soft Sunday smiles. All those tiny, stupid, quiet things that make you feel like you belong to someone.
And if you let yourself feel it for just one second longer—you know exactly who you want to belong to.
You hope that whoever glances your way in this too-cute, hipster boba café thinks you’re on a date. God, you hope so. The way the two of you are sitting, drinks in hand, talking in that soft, familiar rhythm of long-time friends—it has to read as a date. Right?
Some unhinged voice in the back of your head keeps whispering that it is one, even if you never officially said it. Even if you didn’t dare call it that aloud.
You tried to drown that thought out while getting ready. Told yourself over and over—it’s just lunch. Just boba. With Mark. Your friend. One of your best friends. Who you’ve known since middle school. Who’s saved your life and seen you ugly cry at three in the morning. Who also happens to be alarmingly hot and stupidly nice and smiles at you like you’re some secret he’s been keeping warm in his pocket.
And who, to your absolute horror, you’ve recently started thinking about in ways you should not think about Mark Grayson.
He was already seated by the window when you got there. The sunlight poured in softly, and his forearms rested on the table. He was already sipping something dark with brown sugar pearls stuck to the side of the cup and scrolling on his phone, brow furrowed just a little.
You cringed remembering the way you froze at the entrance. Really froze. Long enough for a group of teenagers behind you to shuffle awkwardly around and brush past with a few muttered “excuse me”s and half-laughs. Embarrassing.
When you finally slid into the booth in front of him, Mark looked up and smiled, “Hey.”
And damn it if that stupid word didn’t do something to you.
“Hey,” you said, trying to sound normal. “You beat me here.”
“I was excited,” he said, with that casual, open honesty that always got you. “Sue me.”
He then pushed a drink toward you. You hadn’t even realized he ordered for you—but it was your usual.
“Thanks. You remembered?”
“Course I did.” He shrugged like it was nothing. “Not that hard to remember the most annoying boba order in existence.”
You kicked him under the table. “Bitch.”
He grinned, totally unfazed. “Affectionately.”
You bring your forearms up to rest on the table, leaning in just slightly. The move feels natural—too natural—and you let your head tilt as you look at him, willing yourself to snap out of the storm in your head and focus. Present moment, please. Now would be nice.
The sunlight through the window catches the edge of his jaw, carving golden light into soft angles. His lashes cast shadows. His fingers tap lightly against his cup, unhurried. Your own drink is already gone—sucked down while you tried not to have a crisis about whether or not this felt like a date. Because it does. It really, really does. It feels like one in the quietest, scariest, most electric kind of way.
You’re trying not to jump across the table. God, what the fuck is wrong with you?
You’re insane, that voice in your head shrieks. Clinically. Emotionally. Hormonally.
Your eyes fall—again, helplessly—to his lips. And it hits you that this might be the first time you’ve ever really stared at them, but it also feels like you’ve always known them. You could probably sketch the shape from memory: the soft dip of his top lip, the way the corners twitch up just before he smiles, the slightly darker flush of colour when he bites down to keep from laughing.
You know them the way you know your favourite songs—effortlessly, intimately, over and over.
And it’s only then, maybe a little too late, that you realize his mouth isn’t moving.
Shit. What was the last thing he said?
You snap back to his eyes, expecting to find a look of confusion, maybe amusement. Maybe even irritation. You’d deserve it. You’ve been undressing him with your eyes the entire afternoon.
But you’re surprised when you find a peculiar, absent look on his face.
Mark’s face is distant. Still. His brown eyes are half-focused like he’s listening to something very far away. His hand continues tapping slowly on the side of his cup, but he’s not drinking it. Hasn’t drank from it in a while, actually. Probably because he’s been talking this whole time and you’ve been too busy losing your mind to pay attention.
“Mark?” you say, softly.
He doesn’t react.
Which is strange. Because you know how sharp his senses are, superhearing and all, he could probably hear a raindrop land five cities over if he tried. But right now, he’s staring so intently, so deliberately, that for a split second, you actually worry something might be wrong.
Until you shift. Just a little. Barely an inch.
And his gaze follows the movement, dragging downward like it’s magnetized.
You glance down.
Oh.
Right. The neckline. You forgot you picked this shirt. Or at least, you forgot what it might look like sitting across from someone like Mark.
Your stomach twists with something that’s equal parts heat and embarrassment. You want to roll your eyes—of course this is what’s got him so distracted. For all his superhero nonsense, you’re still friends with a guy.
“Mark,” you say again, this time with a little more bite, trying not to smile.
His eyes flick up from your chest, blinking rapidly. His mouth opens in a small “oh,” a hum catching in the back of his throat as he scrambles to respond, but doesn’t quite manage it in time. A second later, the realization hits, and his entire face ignites. His cheeks go so red you almost feel bad for him. But you find it sort of adorable.
He coughs, clearly trying to recover. His hand rubs awkwardly at the back of his neck.
“Sorry,” He says, smiling meekly at you. His hand drops back to the table. “You just— I mean, I— You look really... goob. I mean boob. Good. I mean good. You look good.”
A shy grin splits your face open as your skin starts to warm. “Thanks. You look goob, too.”
He lets out a breathy laugh, groaning, biting down on his straw. “Fuck off. I’m so sorry.”
“No, no, no,” you say, waving him off with a laugh. “I’ll allow it. That was... actually kinda sweet.”
He smiles at you, all shy and embarrassed. A little crooked. Like he knows what he just did and has no idea what to do with himself now. You’re pretty sure your heart is about to explode into a thousand glittering pieces right there on the table.
You sit there, breath caught somewhere between your ribs, watching him as he ducks his head, and chews on the boba pearls like they hold the secret to surviving this moment. And all you can think—loud, panicked, impossibly clear—is:
You want to kiss him.
And not just kiss him. You want him in a way that’s full-bodied and reckless. You want him with the force of every stupid dream you’ve ever had. You want him in that dizzy, hands-in-hair, clothes-on-the-floor kind of way. You want to ruin this whole perfectly lovely friendship in the worst possible way.
And maybe it’s the way he’s still not meeting your eyes. Or maybe it’s how warm your skin feels. Or how the sunlight is pouring in too golden and soft and romantic and cruel.
“Mark,” you say.
He looks up at you, eyes wide and mouth disgustingly full. “Yeah?”
“I think we should fuck.”
He chokes. Immediately. You watch in real-time as he sucks his drink the wrong way and practically launches into a coughing fit. A splash of tapioca pearls and brown sugar milk flies out of his nose and hits the table.
“Oh my god—” you mutter, reaching across to grab a stack of napkins.
Mark is flailing. Coughing, sputtering, waving a hand like he’s trying to say something but also very much trying not to die. His face is bright red. He’s laughing and coughing at the same time. It’s a mess. A scene. People are staring.
“I’m fine,” he wheezes, between hacks. “I’m—you—what?”
You try to smile, a little nervous. “I said I want to have sex with you.”
Mark goes absolutely still.
He stares at you, wide-eyed, stunned into silence. His mouth opens, but no sound comes out. You watch his gaze dip—just barely. Lower. Lips. Throat. Chest. Then back up again.
“You—what—where is this coming from?” he finally blurts.
“I don’t know,” you say honestly, fingers playing with your straw wrapper. “It just sort of... fell out of me.”
“Fell out of you?” he repeats, completely scandalized.
“I... I've been thinking about it for a while now...” You're starting to feel dread sink into your stomach, thick and slow like honey, but bitter like poison... or puke. What the fuck have you just done?
Your words hang there, dangling over the edge of a cliff you just shoved both of you off of. You can’t look at him. Not properly. Not when your face is on fire and your chest is tight and the booth feels too small. Not when the air feels heavier with every second he doesn’t say anything.
You’re seconds away from bolting. Or vomiting. Or both.
“It's been driving me crazy, believe me,” you manage, voice thinner now. “But uh, if you want to say no, say no."
“Oh my god. You’re serious.”
“...Yeah.”
“Like you want—”
“Yes.”
“Me?”
“Yes, Mark, you.”
He leans back slightly in the booth, and he looks away for a split second—at the window, the floor, anywhere that isn’t your face—but it doesn’t last. His eyes are back on you before you can even blink. “I just...” he starts but then trails off again.
“Can you just... like, reject me?” you finally puff out, cheeks burning. It comes out too quickly like you’re trying to outrun the silence. Your voice is too casual to be convincing, but you try anyway, like saying it first makes it sting less.
“Reject you?”
“I’m... I’m sorry I just threw this on you. I wasn’t thinking.”
“You want me to reject you?” His voice is quiet now, but not confused. There’s something else in it.
“So I can like, move on. Change my name. Move to a different state, maybe.”
The joke lands like a dying leaf. Your laugh is brittle. Empty. It’s all just armour at this point.
But Mark huffs a soft laugh of his own,
“I’m not... I’m. not gonna reject you.”
"You're not?"
He shakes his head slowly like he's still trying to believe this is real. His eyes meet yours, and this time he holds it. Locked in. No flinching. No looking away. All that stunned awkwardness melts into something steadier, something careful. Measured. Wanting. Like he’s finally letting himself consider what it would mean to say yes.
“No,” he says. “That would be stupid. And William would never let me live it down.”
The tension cracks just slightly, pulling a small, breathy laugh from you—something trembling and alive. Your pulse spikes. Your throat’s dry. You're still not sure you're breathing right.
“So... you want to—?”
“Yeah,” he says. Quick. Blunt. No room for misinterpretation.
Then again, softer. Like he’s scared of how much he means it.
“Yeah.”
Internally, you’re both reeling—because that “yeah” didn’t sound like a joke. It didn’t sound like some impulsive sure why not. It sounded like he meant it. All of it.
Mark glances down at his hands like he needs something to look at besides you. “I’ve been thinking about it too. Just didn’t think you were—y’know, thinking about it.”
“Well, I was. I am,” you admit, heart pounding. “And it was... getting really hard to just not say anything.”
He leans forward slightly, elbows on the table, voice lower now. This is no longer a conversation for public ears.
“So what... we just do this?” he asks.
“We could... just try it. See if it works.”
His eyes flick to your mouth again, and it makes your stomach flip.
“Like, casual?” he asks, but there’s a quiet tension under the word. Like he’s testing it out on his tongue and it doesn’t quite fit.
“Sure. Casual. For now.” It comes out a little breathless.
Mark smiles, but it’s not a smug one. It’s nervous. Small. “Right. For now just friends. Who, uh... sleep together.”
You nod, mirroring that same small, nervous grin. “Exactly.”
“But we’re still friends,” he says.
“Of course.”
“And more if we like it.”
“Definitely.”
“So I can take you on a real date if all goes well?”
“Please, do.”
He nods. “So, for now, we can still hang out. And do stupid shit. And eat takeout and talk about movies and—”
“—and maybe also make out sometimes,” you add, trying for lightness, though your voice wavers with the weight of wanting.
Mark pauses. “And definitely do more than make out.”
You blink. “You’re getting bold all of a sudden.”
He shrugs, but his eyes are glued to you now. “I just... don’t want to mess this up. But I also really don’t want to go home without kissing you.”
You inhale sharply.
“Well,” you say, grabbing your drink as an excuse to hide your grin, “your place is closer than mine.”
His expression flickers—first surprise, then realization. “Oh, so like... now? We’re doing this right now?”
You nod, trying to act like it’s nothing, like your insides aren’t vibrating with panic and anticipation. He stands before you do, waiting like he’s afraid you might change your mind if he moves too fast.
When you join him, you don’t touch—but your whole body is practically leaning toward him, every nerve tuned into his orbit. You leave the shop like that: side by side, hearts hammering, skin buzzing, still pretending this isn’t happening. But it is. Oh, it is.
The short walk to your car is deceptively casual on the outside, but inside, you’re spiralling. Spiralling and floating all at once. You’re aware of every breath, every step. A storm of want and nerves and what-ifs spinning in your stomach.
By the time you’re seated behind the wheel, your hands are trembling slightly on your thighs. You try to be subtle about it. Meanwhile, Mark slides into the passenger seat with a blush high on his cheeks—bashful, like he’s already guilty of something. Like the thought alone is enough to make him flustered.
He fiddles with his phone, plugging it in like it’s the most important task of the century. He scrolls through songs like his life depends on picking just the right vibe, and maybe it does. You pretend not to watch him, even though you feel like you're burning a hole through the corner of your eye. He’s acting like everything’s totally normal, like the two of you didn’t just agree—very plainly—to have sex. And god, that boyish fake-casual routine of his is so unfair.
Your breath hitches when the music finally starts. Some song you barely recognize filters through the speakers, but you barely process it. Your fingers twitch around the wheel.
You’d started the engine but never shifted into gear.
Mark glances at you.
Fuck.
That’s it. That’s your last straw.
Because he’s looking at you like he’s waiting. Like he’s curious and soft and a little bit shy, and it cracks something open in your chest. You’ve seen this man punch meteors. You’ve seen him dent walls and bleed for people he loves. And right now, he looks like he’d melt if you so much as leaned in a little closer.
So you do.
You lean (jump, really) across the center console, breath shallow, no hesitation left in you, and press your mouth to his—hot, urgent, not the least bit gentle (you could’ve broken your nose against his steel skin).
He lets out a muffled, surprised sound that you feel more than hear. But he kisses you back immediately, like his body was already on the edge, just waiting for the signal to move. His hands come up to your sides, cradling your ribs so carefully it hurts, like he thinks he’ll crush if he squeezes too hard (he can).
He leans into it fast. His nose bumps yours, and there’s a soft gasp when your lips part. It’s messy. Desperate. Hungry. You sigh into his mouth, tilting your head, and his fingers twitch against your waist. Then his lips part wider, and that’s your cue—your tongue finds the seam of his mouth, dragging across his lower lip before slipping in.
He groans.
Low, breathy, and real.
One of his hands slides lower, skimming the hem of your shirt, the very edge of his pinky brushing against the exposed skin of your side. It makes you tremble. He’s so gentle, like he doesn’t quite trust himself with you yet. Like he’s holding something precious.
You don’t know how long it goes on—seconds, minutes. But the car rocks faintly when he shifts in his seat, and that’s when you start to pull away. Slowly. Breathlessly.
You look at him—his lips parted, eyes still shut, like he’s chasing the kiss even as it slips from him. And god, you’ve seen that look before, but you never let yourself believe it was real. Now you can’t deny it.
Mark blinks at you. Once. Twice.
Then he leans in and kisses you again.
It’s different this time. Short. Sweet. A soft press of lips. Like punctuation at the end of a sentence you’ve both been trying to say for months. It tastes like sugar and burns fire.
He leans back into his seat, finally, hands settling awkwardly over his lap. You notice the way his fingers twitch—nervous, restrained. You could scream. From the heat in your blood. From relief. From how right it all feels.
“Sorry,” you say, even though you’re not. Not at all. You’re still tasting him on your lips. Still humming with the knowledge that he wants you—wants you—the same way you want him.
The way your voice lilts upward, a little smug, is what makes him scoff, eyes rolling.
“Yeah, sure,” he mumbles, shifting in his seat. “Just couldn’t wait, could you?”
You roll your eyes right back at him, grinning as you finally pull the car out of the parking lot. “Yeah, yeah. Fuck you. You said you didn’t want to go home without kissing me, so—I did you a favour.”
“Oh, did you?” he fires back, all sass, and the way he says it makes your stomach flutter.
You scoff, but it’s affectionate. And even though you’re driving now, even though the moment has passed, you can still feel it, thick in the air between you—the tension, the promise, the want.
“Yeah,” you say again, quieter now. A little breathless. “Yeah, I did.”
You park in front of his house and kill the engine.
Neither of you move.
“…So,” Mark says, finally.
“So.”
His head tilts toward you, a slow grin tugging at his lips. “Race you inside.”
“What?”
You don’t get the chance to say more before he’s already yanking open the door, half-tripping over himself in his rush to get out. You watch him scramble up the walkway, basically vaulting over the three porch steps. You just blink, mildly stunned—and vaguely reminded that he could’ve flown the two of you back to his house if he hadn’t insisted on you driving. Your car sits quietly behind you, utterly abandoned, as you step out and lock it with a flat expression.
He’s waiting for you at the front door, breathless and smug.
“I win.”
“You cheated,” you mutter, strolling up behind him.
“Nuh-uh.”
His hands fumble with the keys, like he’s suddenly forgotten how locks work. You wait behind him, close enough to feel the warmth radiating off his back, the way his shoulders tense slightly when you’re that near. It makes something in your chest squeeze, soft and wild.
The lock finally clicks. He pushes the door open and steps aside dramatically, gesturing for you to go in. “Milady.”
You roll your eyes but smile as you pass him.
Inside, it’s quiet. Familiar. You’ve been here a million times. Your gaze flicks around automatically. Debbie must’ve gotten a new carpet recently—soft beige with delicate lines you don’t remember from the last time you came over. You hum softly under your breath, grounding yourself in the domestic detail. Always a little surprised, somehow, by the size of this place. It’s modern and clean, tastefully decorated. It smells like laundry detergent and something faintly citrusy. It smells like him.
You turn around and he’s right there. Looking at you like you hung the stars and accidentally knocked one loose when you kissed him in the car.
And then he kisses you again.
No hesitation this time. Just Mark, pulling you in by the waist, cupping your face and his mouth finds yours with a kind of aching slowness—soft, cautious, almost reverent.
You melt into him instantly. Your fingers fist into the front of his shirt, knuckles brushing his chest as you pull him closer, grounding yourself in the warmth of him. He lets out a sound—a mix between a sigh and a groan—and it sinks low into your belly, heat blooming there with terrifying ease. He kisses you deeper, more sure now, like he’s already memorized the shape of your mouth.
His hands slide down your back, warm and soothing.
“Mom’s out with Oliver,” Mark murmurs against your lips like he knows you were about to ask. His voice is low, rough from disuse and want. “Won’t be back for a while.”
“Lucky us,” you mumble, and you barely finish the words before he kisses you again, harder this time, lips parting yours with such gentle insistence that your knees almost give.
He makes this delightful little sound, hands shifting to cradle your head gently, fingers threading through your hair like he’s been waiting a lifetime for the chance.
“So lucky,” He agrees, regretfully breaking away when your body tenses in a silent request for air. You’re disappointed too. Who needs breathing, anyway?
“Did you wanna watch a movie first?”
He’s not even out of breath.
“Not really,” you reply with a breathless laugh, cheeks already sore from grinning so much. Your hands are still resting against his chest, fingertips twitching with the need to keep touching him. He grins back, nodding once, and starts guiding you backwards through the house.
He’s careful with you. You’re walking blind, caught in the middle of another kiss when he gently redirects you away from a stray shoe, his hand tightening briefly around your waist to steer you around Oliver’s skateboard left smack in the middle of the foyer. You barely notice it. All you can focus on is his mouth, trailing kisses to the curve of your neck, the press of his lips to the slope of your shoulder. You shiver when his teeth graze your skin.
He doesn’t stop.
Not until you’re pressed up against the wall at the bottom of the staircase, both of you panting between kisses that grow hotter, messier. His hands bracket your hips, thumbs stroking small circles that send sparks crawling up your spine. He groans when your hips roll forward again his, instinctive, your body reacting before your brain can catch up.
You think you hear him whisper your name.
You’re tugging at the hem of his shirt, desperate to feel more skin, and when your fingers slide beneath it and skim along his stomach, he freezes. Not with fear—but like he’s overwhelmed. Like he’s trying not to fall apart from something as simple as your touch.
And then, in a breathless pause, he pulls back just enough to speak. His forehead leans into yours, eyes fluttering closed as he exhales shakily.
“I imagined this being sweeter,” he pants. “I’m sorry.”
You nearly melt on the spot.
Because the way he says it—it’s not embarrassed. It’s earnest. Vulnerable. It takes everything in you not to scream with joy.
God, if he knew how often you’d imagined this too—how many nights you’d curled up thinking of how it might feel to kiss him, touch him, have him like this—he’d probably panic and fly halfway across the city.
Instead, all you manage is a broken little whimper as your fingers twist in his shirt, dragging him closer. “God, Mark, that’s so hot.”
His eyes blink open, stunned. “It is?”
“Yeah,” you say, breathless.
And that’s all it takes.
You don’t even remember deciding to move, but suddenly you’re being rushed up the stairs, feet stumbling as Mark pulls you with him. Your shoes get kicked off somewhere mid-way, lost in the blur of hands and mouths and shared laughter.
He’s hovering, quite literally gliding over the ground, but he seems to barely notice. His feet skim the steps, weightless with something that appears like joy.
Mark fumbles the doorknob twice before finally swinging the door open. Since he’s still kissing you, still pushing you gently forward, you almost tumble inside. He catches you easily, a strong arm firm around your waist, the other bracing himself against the doorframe.
He doesn’t even seem like he notices all that much, floating upwards for a moment before he’s kissing you silly all over again. It’s hot and wet and when he opens his mouth slightly, you follow, your lips parting just enough for your tongues to meet.
Your body fits against his like it was made for it, warm and pliant, your cheek brushing against his as he angles his head and deepens the kiss. You think you never want to stop kissing him. It’s addicting. He’s a drug and you’re hooked, irrevocably.
You think you might be trembling, just a little.
You decide, boldly, to shove him backwards.
He lets you.
He trips over something in the mess of his room—could be a book, a shoe, or a part of his suit. You don’t get the chance to look. He stumbles until his back hits the wall beside his closet, half-collapsing against the old Seance Dog poster, and you swear he grins against your mouth.
You pull back just enough to breathe, just enough to look at him. Mark’s lips are kiss-swollen and flushed pink, cheeks dusted a deep red. His eyes are heavy-lidded, pupils botched wide with want. He chases your mouth again, barely containing a whine when you press your hands a little harder against his chest to keep him in place.
“Oh, Mark,” you murmur, lips brushing the corner of his mouth before trailing down to his jaw, then his throat. You press a hot, open-mouthed kiss beneath his ear and feel him shiver. “You’re so fucking pretty.”
“I—” The breath he exhales is ragged, shaky. You feel the way his pulse jumps strangely beneath your tongue as you mouth at the delicate skin of his neck. The slight scrape of your teeth draws out a sound you could get drunk on.
The afternoon sun floods into the room in slats, casting golden stripes across his skin. Everything smells like him. The colour of his t-shirt matches his walls, and the thought makes you smile stupidly as you glance up at him again. He’s smiling too. It’s infectious.
You can still feel the strength of the heat rolling off of his skin. “No one’s ever called me pretty before,” he mumbles against your mouth.
You pull back, eyebrows furrowed. “You’re lying.”
“I’m not…”
A frown tugs at your lips as your hands drop to the hem of his shirt with a wordless plea. He pulls it off obediently, albeit somewhat distractedly. “That’s fucking criminal.”
Where it lands doesn’t even matter—your eyes are fixed on his chest. His bare chest that you’ve been given permission to properly ogle at. You swear you feel your mouth salivate a bit.
“I feel like I should’ve known sooner,” he teases, breathless.
You blink up at him. “Known what?”
“That you liked me. I mean—look at you.” He gestures toward your face with a sheepish grin. “You’re drooling.”
“I’m not drooling,” you huff, making a face even though your cheeks are warm. “I’m admiring. Big difference.”
Mark quirks an eyebrow at you.
“And yeah,” you say, fingers dancing along the waistband of his jeans now, just teasing. “You’re pretty stupid for not knowing sooner.”
He scoffs, but the look in his eyes is warm and soft and maybe a little reverent. You don’t let him say anything else.
“Stupidly pretty,” you murmur, crashing back into him, pressing your mouth to his again with more heat than before. You lick into his mouth, then drag your lips along the column of his throat, down to that same aching spot on his neck. You feel his hands tighten on your waist, and he exhales a shaky, desperate breath like it’s the first one he’s had in minutes.
Your hands roam more freely now, gliding across the newly exposed skin like you’ve earned the right. You’ve seen Mark shirtless before—countless times, actually—but never like this. Not with your breath catching in your throat and your hands trembling just slightly with want. Not with your mouth practically watering as you finally get to touch him like you’ve always wanted to.
Well… unless that one time you helped him put sunscreen on his back last summer counts.
Because this is different.
This time, he’s letting you feel. Explore. He lets you be a little mean and even tug at the trail of hair leading under his pants.
He’s warm in the way fresh sunlight is; comforting, radiant, and magnetic. Your fingers trail down the groove between his pecs, slowly. You knew his body is obviously muscled since his Invincible suit doesn’t leave too much to the imagination, but it’s different feeling warm, sculpted skin than the cool spandex (or whatever it’s made out of.) You trace the faint outline of each muscle, letting your hands dip lower until you reach the ridges of his abs.
And just beneath them—your hand pauses.
You feel it. A soft, rhythmic thrum under your palm. Not quite a heartbeat. Not quite human. It’s steadier than a pulse, more like a hum—like something alive and electric and ancient ticking in the hollow of his chest. It makes your breath hitch.
How alien is he? You wonder.
But the thought doesn’t scare you. If anything, it makes your stomach swoop. You press your hand flat against the faint, vibrating sensation, mesmerized.
Mark watches you, breathing a little heavier now. His hands are wandering too—palms gliding down your sides with more confidence than before. You gasp when he gropes your ass, hard, the pressure unexpected and firm. He pulls you flush against him, and you yelp, catching yourself on his chest with a small, surprised laugh.
His chuckle is low, rumbling beneath your cheek as you bury your face in his skin. It’s so warm. You want to wrap yourself in it.
Then his lips are back—just behind your ear, kissing that soft spot that makes your thoughts short-circuit. You feel yourself sway forward, dizzy with heat and hunger.
Your mind flickers between two options: Pull your shirt off or pull him to the bed.
Instead, your knees hit the carpet before your brain can stop you.
His hands dart forward to pull you back up, brows furrowed with concern, but you’re already reaching for his belt.
“Oh,” he sighs, startled and wide-eyed. “You don’t have to—”
“I wanna,” you murmur, voice dripping with intention as your hand palms him over his jeans. “Please let me.”
You press your cheek against the bulge, coddling it like it’s already yours, your breath catching as you drag your nose slowly along its length. You mouth at the fabric, teasing him with slow, open kisses, and then you look up, eyes wide and sparkling and pleading.
“Please, Mark.”
His knees nearly buckle.
“Yeah,” he exhales, voice hoarse. “Yeah. Okay. Yeah.”
He looks stunned, dazed, like he’s dreaming something too good to be real. His hands cradle your face so gently it makes your stomach flip, thumbs brushing your jaw.
He’s like a furnace, radiating heat in waves. Like a lantern in the dark. Bright and alive and everything in you aches to touch him more.
You kiss his clothed cock again, slower this time, almost reverent, and he shudders. You can hear the faint rasp in his breath, the catch in his throat as your fingers finally undo his belt and tug his jeans down.
He steps out of them awkwardly, kicking them to the side—and that’s when you notice the blur of colours on his boxers. You blink. Then squint.
And laugh.
“Is that…” You grin, tugging the elastic waistband back with a finger to get a better look. “Seance Dog?”
Tiny cartoon super dogs dance across the fabric, all in different poses—one in a wizard hat, a few riding on yellow stars. You let the waistband snap back against his skin with a cheeky pop.
Mark’s ears go red.
“It was laundry day,” he mumbles, flustered and pink.
“I think it’s cute,” you giggle, ducking forward and pressing a kiss right above the stupid little dogs. “So stupidly cute.”
He tries to say something in return, but you’re giggling all over his very real, very hard dick, kissing at the shape of it, and whatever excuse he was about to make dies a quick death.
“Whatever,” he mutters under his breath, trying and failing to glare at you.
You flash him an innocent look, resting your chin on his hip. “I swear, it’s cute.”
“You’re just saying that because you have me half-naked.”
“Maybe,” you smirk, batting your lashes. Then: “Are you gonna let me suck your dick, or…?”
He groans. His hand flies to his face to hide the actual whimper that comes out, and when he peeks between his fingers at you—grinning like you’re the devil—he can’t help but laugh. A breathless, half-embarrassed noise that melts into the warm air between you.
“Are you gonna stop teasing me, or what?”
You decide to be nice. Because honestly, you're not sure if you'll ever get the chance to be here again. A jagged breath escapes Mark’s lips when you finally tug his boxers down and free his cock from the cotton confines. He’s flushed deep and aching, and the heat low in your stomach tightens at the sight of him. He basically springs out, and you actually flinch a little as it bounces against his stomach. Hard, red, and glistening at the tip with precum.
You blink. Wow.
Okay. Wow.
He's pretty everywhere, but this is... a lot. In the best way. Surpasses all of your expectations. 10/10.
It twitches in front of your face and you feel the warmth radiating off him like a space heater turned up too high. Your hand hovers—hesitant for just a second—before you wrap your palm around him, slowly, carefully, like you’re holding something precious.
He twitches again.
The muscles in his stomach tense, flexing like a ripple under his skin, and you can’t help it—you smirk. Have you mentioned how insanely good he looks right now? That gorgeous, pink-tinged flush creeping down his chest, all the way to the tip of his cock?
Your brain short-circuits. Just pretty boy, pretty boy, pretty boy playing on repeat in your head like a broken record.
Mark exhales a shuddering sigh, and it punches straight through you. “Warm…” he whispers, dazed, eyes hazy and half-lidded. He looks drunk off you already.
“William wasn't kidding,” you mutter, half to yourself as you breathe again.
Mark blinks. “What?”
“He said you had a big dick.”
Mark chokes. “William—he’s never—what?”
“Said you guys used to stand side by side and measure them.”
“Fuck off—he did not say that—”
“Is it true you used them as lightsabers?”
“Oh my god—” Mark groans. He sounds like he’s dying. You don’t know if it’s the secondhand embarrassment or the way your thumb brushes right across his tip.
Maybe both.
“Shut the fuck up, asshole,” he mutters, playfully pushing at your face. You bite your lip, triumphant.
Without thinking, you tighten your grip. Just a little. Just enough to make him keen.
His laugh dissolves into a broken sound, somewhere between a moan and a whimper, and the hand that had pushed your face away now finds a new home buried in your hair.
You lean in and press a soft, teasing kiss to the flushed tip. His cock twitches again.
Mark’s breath catches in his throat.
Your hand never stops moving, a slow up-and-down that has him trembling. You kiss him again, right on the slit, and feel the heat pulsing against your lips. You run your tongue up the underside of his cock, tracing that thick vein from base to tip, and Mark makes a strangled, broken sound—like he’s holding on for dear life.
You push back his foreskin with your thumb and swirl your tongue in a lazy circle around the head. A droplet of precum smears across your lips and you hum against him, taking your time.
You glance up at Mark, checking back in.
“That’s good,” He affirms, voice breathy. “That’s really fucking good.”
Every sound he makes engraves itself into your brain.
You trail kisses down his shaft, your tongue learning every ridge, every pulse, every twitch like you’re memorizing him. Your pace is slow and calculated, and Mark is panting now, legs tense, body twitching under your every touch. You glance up—and fuck—he’s flushed all the way to his ears, lips parted, eyes glassy.
You wrap your lips around the head and sink down.
“Fuuuck,” he whispers, throwing his head back, and staring at the ceiling. His hips jolt upward, pushing deeper into your mouth. It’s a messy rhythm at first, but you welcome it, the way he shivers and gasps when he hits the back of your throat.
You work what you can with your mouth and use your hand on the rest, pumping steadily in time with the bob of your head. Your spit slicks his cock as you move faster, drool dripping down your chin and his shaft.
His thighs are shaking, abs tensing with every gasp. You can feel his restraint fraying—see it in the way his fists clutch the cushions, how his hips start jerking forward, chasing more of the heat and wetness of your mouth.
His cock pulses, thick and hot on your tongue, and he’s babbling now—words half-formed and strangled:
“F-fuck- shit, shit, shit—I’m gonna—ah, fuck me, yeah, f-fuck, I’m— wait shit—”
He pulls your head off at the last second, the hand in your hair tugging, gentle but frantic. You let him, breath caught in your throat, barely registering it until he’s panting and his cock twitches one more time before he cums.
Hot, white ropes spill across your face.
The first hits your cheek, thick and warm. Another lands across your nose, streaking upward toward your brow. It catches on your lip—your open mouth still parted. You blink in surprise but stay still, a little stunned by how hot your skin suddenly feels under each drop.
His moans taper off into little whines, his breath catching in his throat as he watches—eyes wide, pupils blown out wider and darker than you’ve ever seen eyes do before. It’s a strange feeling when you’re reminded that Mark isn’t fully human, even though he mostly looks like it.
You watch his pupils shrink back to normal size and he shakes his head like he’s trying to focus. And his voice cracks. His thumb brushes along your jaw, then dips lower, gently dragging through the mess he left on your chin like he's trying to process the sight of you. Like he can’t believe what he’s done to you.
“Holy shit,” he gasps, blinking down at you. “Fuck, I didn’t mean to—I should’ve warned you—sorry.”
You look up at him, breathless, heart thudding loud in your ears. A grin starts to creep onto your face before you can stop it. You try to fight it—you should be playing it cool—but you can’t help it. Your smile is slow and sweet and so telling. You fucking freak.
“That was…”
“Gross. I know. I’m sorry.” he interrupts, still flushed red and clearly panicking a little.
“I was gonna say hot,” you murmur.
Mark exhales hard, something unsteady and relieved loosening in his shoulders as he leans down to pull you up. You don’t complain when your knees sting, don’t comment on the ache blooming in your thighs. You barely notice it.
His hand comes to cradle your face, and you brace for a kiss—maybe something soft and grateful. Instead, Mark kisses you like he’s starving. Tongue sliding against yours, mouth open and frantic, tasting you, tasting himself. He licks your teeth, then your lips—wet and shining—and then your cheek, dragging his tongue through his own cum, whimpering into your mouth when he tastes it again.
Get a load of this fucking freak, Jesus Christ.
He doesn’t stop. Licks across your skin with deliberate, dirty reverence. Over your chin, your cheekbone, even the curve of your nose—slow and deliberate, like he’s savouring it. His cum. Your skin. You.
He whimpers. Literally whimpers. God. And then he moans. Loud.
You just laugh, soft and dreamy, trying to stay grounded even as every nerve ending in your body feels like it’s sparking to life, flames consuming you. You’re still dressed, and yet you’ve never felt more bare. More downed.
Mark steps out of his boxers and pants, bunched around his ankles. His skin is slick with sweat, flushed with exertion, and glowing with something golden. You’ve never seen anyone look more gorgeous in your life. You realize, with a quiet sort of devastation, that you’d do anything to stay in this moment.
He leans in again, kissing you hard, both of you ignoring the sticky trail still clinging to your face. Your mouth, your skin—it’s all his. And he kisses like he knows it.
You kiss him back like you need him to know it’s mutual.
The ache between your thighs throbs now, sharp and insistent, but you almost forget it when Mark groans—a deep, low sound that vibrates in your chest. He cradles your jaw in both hands, pulling back just far enough to whisper, “Keep kissing me. Don’t ever stop.”
You nod, dazed, breathless. “I won’t.”
You kiss him again. His lips. His cheek. His nose. His forehead. He shivers under each one. You want to kiss him until your lips go numb, until time forgets the two of you ever existed as anything other than this.
And then—without warning—Mark starts to float again.
You feel it before you see it: the weightlessness, the subtle lift of his frame. His hands never leave your face, but his body hovers, high enough that you have to crane your neck to meet his lips. He laughs breathlessly, as though he forgot he could even do this, and he takes you with him—gently, almost reverently.
Your back hits the bed seconds later, soft and warm, and you sprawl out beneath him. Mark hovers above, eyes shining with something deep and giddy and overwhelming. His smile is wide and blinding.
Your heart thrums beneath your ribs, loud and full and dizzy, and you grin back up at him, dazed, knowing he can hear it.
You reach down, fumbling with the button on your jeans. Your fingers are clumsy, adrenaline and nerves making them tremble, and you curse under your breath. Mark dips down to help, but he’s no better—his hands fumble too, and the both of you dissolve into breathless, giggling laughter. His body presses into yours as he tries again, lips brushing yours between chuckles, and eventually, together, you manage to get them off.
He tosses them behind him with a careless flick—there’s a loud crash as something topples off your nightstand. You both flinch, wide-eyed.
You glance toward the sound but don’t move. “What was that?”
Mark snorts against your lips. “Lamp. Maybe.”
Neither of you moves to check. Not when his weight settles over you again. Not when his hands find your waist and slide beneath the hem of your shirt, warm and certain. His touch is steady now, smoothing up your sides, slipping along the curves of your ribs like he’s mapping out every part of you.
He pulls away just enough to look at you, a funny-looking grin on his face as he watches his hands ruck up your shirt gently. When he lifts the top higher, the fabric bunching at your ribs, you raise your arms to help, and for one breathless second, your hands meet midair—yours and his, tangled in the cotton.
Mark yanks it off with a breathless little laugh and lets it fall off the edge of the bed.
His gaze drops. His smile fades.
There’s a beat of stillness where he just looks at you. Really looks. His eyes drag over your chest—mismatched bra and all—and he blinks slow, like he’s committing it to memory. You swear he stops breathing.
His thumb lifts, brushing along the strap of your bra where it sits on your shoulder. He plucks at it gently, eyes fixed on the way the fabric moves beneath his touch. He does it again, slower this time, dragging the pad of his thumb over the edge of the cup. The way he stares—it’s not even lust, not exactly. It’s something softer.
The intensity of his gaze makes you want to shy away for just a second. You sit up and jab his side.
He jerks with a yelp, eyes flying back to yours.
You raise a brow, fighting your smug grin. “Who’s drooling now?”
Mark rolls his eyes, mock offended, but the flush on his cheeks betrays him. He opens his mouth to respond, and you swipe your thumb across the corner of his lips like you’re wiping something away. Annoyed, he groans loudly.
“Yeah, yeah. I get it.”
He catches your fingers in his hand. Brings them to his mouth. Nips at them playfully. You squeal, and then he kisses your knuckles so soft it makes your stomach swoop.
And suddenly, the teasing slips out of you like air from a balloon.
You lie back without thinking. Just melt into the bed. Mark follows you down, still holding your hand. He kneels between your legs, gaze pinned to you like there’s nowhere else he’d rather be. When he finally lets go of your hand, it’s only to cradle your face in one palm, thumb brushing along your cheekbone like he’s trying to memorize the shape of you.
“You’re so beautiful.”
The words are quiet. Like a secret. Like he doesn’t even mean to say them aloud.
You flush hard, suddenly self-conscious in your bra and underwear—the colours don’t match, the cut’s nothing special, there might be a stain if he looks hard enough—but Mark’s eyes don’t so much as flinch.
You swallow, trying to think of something to say. “Says you,” you manage, reaching up to tug him down. “You were wearing Seance Dog boxers not five minutes ago. And I still almost cried from how good you look.”
He lets out a breath of a laugh, forehead bumping yours.
And then you kiss him sweetly. His lips press to yours like he’s trying to say something through it, like he’s trying to give you all the things he doesn’t have words for. One of his hands roams lower, down your side, curving around the bend of your thigh. He hooks your knee up and around his waist like it’s instinct, fingers digging into the plush skin just beneath your ass, and pulls you closer so he can grope your ass and do some other decidedly not-so-sweet things.
He discovers you’re wet under his palm through the rough fabric of your panties. No surprise there for you, you’ve been wet for a while now, but a deep sound tear from the back of his throat, so far that it almost sounds like a growl. It’s hard to separate your thoughts from him. Kissing him, sweet and warm, blazing and getting hotter.
You barely have time to think of anything else but your beautiful friend who happens to be an alien superhero. Your head’s too full of him to do anything but gasp when he moves again.
A ghost of a touch—just one finger dragging down the centre of your panties, light enough to drive you insane—pulls a small, breathy sound from your lips. And then he’s doing it again, tracing over your clit, featherlight and teasing. You’re not sure if your face simmers from embarrassment or sheer eagerness, but it’s hot either way. Your breath stutters. Your hips twitch, helplessly.
“Y’like that?” Mark mutters against your mouth, voice thick and a little rough, and you nod against his lips without hesitation, a soft whimper slipping past them.
“Good,” he breathes. “Good… lemme know if I’m doing this wrong.”
The words hit you like sunlight breaking through clouds—so warm and sweet it makes your chest ache like a cavity. That twist of pleasure low in your stomach tightens a little more, and you have to resist the instinct to roll your hips against his hand. He’s being so careful, and it just makes you want him even more.
“I don’t think there’s anything you could do wrong, Mark,” you sigh, and he kisses you again, deeper this time, his tongue brushing yours in a way that makes your toes curl.
You pull away on a light, breathless hum, licking your kiss-swollen lips as you blink up at him. There’s the tiniest flicker of disappointment on his face, quickly replaced when your hands slide up to the straps of your bra.
“Take this off?” Phrased like a question, secretly a plea, a demand wrapped in velvet and you’re verging on begging. Mark huffs, pretty lips curving upwards.
His hand slips away from between your thighs, trailing heat across your skin as he reaches behind you to unclasp your bra. The second the strap loosens, he watches you slide it off, his gaze dropping like gravity’s pulling it down.
His pupils dilate in that weird, telltale alien way they do as he takes in the sight of your tits.
A warm palm comes up to cup one breast, his touch tender, adoring—and then he leans in and bites. Not hard, just enough to make you hiss and gasp, the shock of it sparking in your chest. Your nipples peak to attention. His mouth is everywhere all at once, licking, sucking... marking you. You barely recognize the sounds leaving your throat, broken and wanting.
You’d caught a glimpse of yourself in his mirror earlier—faint love bites trailing across your neck, purpling and pretty—and now you can feel him adding more. You wonder idly if he’ll wear the ones you gave him too, or if his body will heal them away before sunset.
Mark drifts lower, slow and steady. You sink your fingers into his hair, threading through soft, inky black strands, and he rewards you with a kiss pressed just beneath your breast. Then your ribs. Then the centre of your belly, nose bumping your navel as he licks slow, warm stripes up and down your skin, teasing just along the underside of your boobs again.
It’s almost too much. You’re breathless from how soft he’s being. From how much he clearly wants you. From how he’s taking his time.
You look down at him, chest rising and falling. He’s already looking at you—of course he is. You follow the line of his nose, the curve of his jaw, the soft arch of his eyebrows. There’s this little furrow at the corners of his eyes you know is from years of smiling, and your heart just about splits open at the sight of him.
You have it so bad for him that your hips jerk up instinctively, needing more contact—needing him—just because his eyes catch yours and hold.
Mark presses a soft, sweet kiss to your knee. “I’m so excited I think I might pass out,” he mumbles, voice thick and a little shaky, the words dragging warmly over your skin. The tip of his nose nudges along the inside of your leg, tracing a slow, lazy path downward—knee to thigh—his breath fanning across sensitive skin.
Then his mouth finds you.
One gentle kiss through the thin fabric of your panties, right against your cunt. You twitch, a sweet noise pushing past your lips.
He follows with a slow lick, dragging his tongue in a teasing stripe over you, the wet, thin barrier of your underwear doing nothing to dull the pressure. You huff breathlessly, your brows drawing together as he hums low against your clit.
The duvet crinkles beneath you as you sigh and sink into it. There’s a low throb curling deep in your gut, spreading like wildfire.
“Mark,” you sigh his name like it’s a prayer.
He hums again, this time lower, rougher. His fingers dip beneath the elastic of your panties, warm and tentative, but he doesn’t pull them down just yet. His mouth moves lower, nose pressing in just right, and it steals the air from your lungs, your exhale lilted with a moan.
“I feel like we should have music playing,” he murmurs.
“Music?” you echo, half-dazed, raising an eyebrow you’re pretty sure he can’t see. His only answer is the smirk you feel more than see, pressed right into your skin.
And then he moves the gusset of your panties aside.
He groans—an actual, full-bodied moan—like the sight of you just knocked the breath out of him. He dips a finger into his mouth, wetting it, and mutters something under his breath about giving you a heads-up, that he’s not exactly an expert and most of it comes from the porn he watches (those homemade ones, the amateur videos couples post on Twitter which he swears are genuine clips of what sex is like).
You almost laugh—almost. You're about to tell him not to worry, that you probably know even less—but then his finger presses against you, tentative but eager, and slowly, carefully, he sinks in and you can’t help the soft groan that burns through you.
“Fuck, Mark,” you gasp, the words catching somewhere in your throat. He withdraws immediately, eyes flicking up to yours in question, and sucks his newly wet digit finger into his mouth.
“Good?” he asks.
You nod frantically. “S’good. So good.”
“Fuck—can I?” He asks, and you nod. You don’t know why he’s asking, you gave him a green light ages ago, but your hips lift to help him anyway as he hooks his fingers in your panties and pulls them down. “Y’taste so good,”
Mark leans down and puts his mouth on your hot cunt again. Every slow, willful stroke of his is timed perfectly to the beat pulsing through you. His hands hook under your thighs and pull your legs apart wider, his mouth slanting over you in a way that makes your back arch off the bed.
Your hand tangles in his dark, inky hair and tightens reflexively when he finds your clit again. He doesn’t flinch, doesn’t slow, even when you tug. His tongue moves with growing confidence, and the velvet heat of his mouth spreads slick across you, every pass making you ache harder.
A breeze from the window flutters the curtains, the only sign the outside world still exists. But in here, everything is warm and golden and humming—all soft sheets and quiet gasps, all Mark Grayson.
If the tug hurts, Mark doesn’t show it. He hums again, deep and greedy, and your hips rock helplessly against the slope of his nose. Your fingers tighten, your eyes squeeze shut.
“Oh god,” You whine prettily. “That’s— uh— fuck, that’s really good.”
Between your thighs, you hear and feel the moan Mark gives back. Your thighs twitch, caught in that impossible pull whether to close around his head and warm his ears or keep them open just to feel more. Your hips continue to move instinctively, helpless rolls up into his face. And he takes it appreciatively.
His tongue drags down your folds, and he sucks and slurps, slow and purposeful before flicking at your fluttering entrance. It makes you squeal, a sound you barely recognize as yours.
“Fuck,” he rasps, pulling back just enough to speak. His voice is hoarse, soaked in arousal. “You’re so wet.”
You can only blink, dazed, caught somewhere between disbelief and bliss. Mark sounds like he’s in heaven, like this is as good for him as it is for you—maybe even better. And god, if he keeps talking like that, you’ll never recover.
His chin and lips are slick, shining in the low light. You don’t know if he’s been talking to you the whole time, but you can’t dwell. Not when he’s back on you, plush lips locking around your clit and lavishing across the length of your slit. He moans into you, tongue dipping deep, greedy and soft and insistent.
The pressure in your core coils tighter, the pleasure winding up like a string pulled taut. Your chest rises and falls in sharp, shallow breaths. Your voice dissolves into a string of high, breathy little “yes, yes, yes,”s and Mark’s name, over and over, like a mantra.
He mutters something again, something messy and mumbled into your cunt. It takes you a second to realize he’s tapping at your hand where it’s buried in his hair. You lace your fingers with his, and he sighs like you just gave him oxygen.
“Please,” he says into your skin, almost frantically, “please cum on my face. Please, please, s’only fair.”
Your mouth parts, breath catching. He’s so beautiful—messy hair, flushed cheeks, his lips swollen and wet, eyes dark and heavy with lust. He glances up at you, and for a second, his eyes meet yours. But then his lids flutter shut, a shiver rolling down his spine as he moans again into your pussy.
“Fuck,” you swear.
“Yeah?” Mark hums before slowly sinking a finger inside you again. It’s slow, precise. Intentional Pumping the digit in and out of you with ease.
“Yeah, yeah,” you whisper.
“On my face?”
“Yes.”
“Promise?”
“Y-yeah.”
“Pinky promise?”
“Fuck yes, Mark,” you snap, voice rising. “I’ll cum on your fucking face—shut up!”
You see it then—that look on his face. A smug, delighted one. The same one he wore last night at the bowling alley when he finally knocked down a pin after guttering every ball. But now, it’s laced with morale, more self-satisfied, delighted, proud. Like he knew what you’d say. Like this was always going to happen.
And he just wanted to piss you off.
“Fuck you,” you mutter.
Mark chuckles, wicked and low—and then he adds a second finger.
A pressure builds low in your belly—slow at first, like a ripple pulling tight across your core, until it's urgent, searing, and impossible to ignore. Every movement Mark makes intensifies it, the flick of his tongue, the curl of his fingers inside you, the way his mouth works your clit. It’s not subtle anymore. It’s all-consuming. Flickers of starlight burst behind your closed eyelids, and you feel like you’re floating—no, caught, tethered to the sheets by his arm locked firmly over your hips.
“…Just like that,” you whisper, breath hitching. The words spill out instinctively, barely more than air. But they light him up—you can feel the way he doubles down, how he hones in on every sweet spot with sharper focus. “Keep going. ‘M close… so close, Mark. Please, don’t stop. Please just—”
Your mouth drops open. Not a sound escapes. Not even air. You go still, caught in that heart-stopping moment where everything tightens—every nerve pulled taut.
Then it rocks through you like lightning—white-hot and blinding. Your whole body jerks, legs trembling as the orgasm washes over you with no restraint. A whimper bursts from your throat, then another, and then it’s just breathless moans and helpless groans as you claw for something—anything. One foot presses into Mark’s back, anchoring you. Your fingers tangle in his hair again, desperate. The sheets twist beneath your spine,
Mark moans into you, a sound that hums right through your bones. He doesn’t let up—he licks you through it with soft, steady strokes, like he knows exactly what your body needs. Gentle. Sure. So fucking sweet.
When you finally manage to push him away, trembling and spent, he pulls back slowly—like he hates to leave you. He drags his fingers out of you, and plants a soft, lingering kiss to your swollen clit. A farewell, like he’s grateful for it. When he lifts his head, his face is shining with slick, lips pink, eyes dark and dazed.
His grin is crooked, eyes sparkling. “I think I did good.”
“Could be better...”
He rolls his eyes and leans in slow, almost shy. Like he’s giving you the chance to pull away. You don’t. You kiss him back eagerly, tasting yourself on his lips.
“You should sit on my face and suck me off next time,” he says, his voice low and serious. “After our date. Obviously.”
“Obviously.”
The idea of a date and a possible next time sends a thrill right through you, low and giddy and a little unhinged.
“I wanna fuck you first,” you murmur, your breath still uneven, chest rising and falling against his. The words come out raw and honest, no hesitation, and it sends a shiver down Mark’s spine. You feel it, the way he literally trembles.
He groans softly, tucking himself into your side, arms curling around your waist like it’s the most normal thing to do. “Maybe next time,” he mumbles, pressing a kiss to the curve of your neck. His eyes are shut tight, and he clings to you like your words rewired something inside him.
“You need a minute?” you ask, fingers stroking along his back.
“Just a minute… You?”
“…Yeah.”
“Okay, good. I don’t have condoms anyway.”
You snort, eyelids heavy as you nuzzle into him. “When’s your mom getting home?”
“Probably not for another couple hours.”
You glance at him, still breathless, still kind of high off him. “Wanna fly to the store and get some? Pick up takeout on the way?”
He groans dramatically. “You’re gonna kill me.”
You grin. “We can plan out our date after, too. I’ll even read an issue of Seance Dog.”
Mark grins back, a lazy, cocky tilt to his mouth. “Fuck yes. Can I pick the takeout?”
“Sure, you’re paying anyways.”
#mark grayson x reader#mark grayson smut#invincible x reader#invincible smut#faye’s writing ⭑.ᐟ#mark’s empire
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٠ ࣪⭑ you are in love
pairing: clark kent x reader (3.0K words)
summary: clark kent had always been a good friend to you at the daily planet—but as the two of you fall head over heels for each other, you can’t help but notice the striking similarities between him and superman
warnings & content: mutual pining, clark is a sweetheart and a goofball, female reader, reader is too perceptive for her own good, journalist!reader, clark is a little bit of a loser
Clark Kent was something out of a dream.
Tall, broad-shouldered, and way too polite, like someone had ripped a leading man from a black-and-white movie and dropped him into the bullpen of the Daily Planet. He brought you coffee on Mondays, held the elevator even when you were running across the lobby like a lunatic, and laughed at your jokes like they were actually funny.
Maybe he actually did find them funny.
So, it wasn't very hard to believe that you fell for him hard. Head over heels hard.
Cat and Lois cheered you on every time you spoke to Clark. You thought they'd tease relentlessly, but they were actually incredibly supportive. Lois thought you two were a perfect pair, and Cat.. well, Cat just loved to be a part of gossip. Especially romantic gossip. But she'd never dare tell a soul you liked Clark; that's what was so great about her.
And Clark? Clark was.. clueless. Or maybe not, you couldn’t tell. He blushed when you complimented his ties. He once held eye contact for a solid ten seconds before walking into a filing cabinet. But then he’d disappear halfway through lunch for “an errand,” only to show up later with windblown hair and an excuse so flimsy even Jimmy side-eyed him.
There was something about him—something too gentle, too careful. Like he was constantly trying to shrink himself down to fit the room. Like he wasn’t just Clark Kent, but something more.
Sometimes you had to double take and remind yourself this was your coworker, your friend. But then again.. he did remember your coffee order down to the extra shot of espresso. He always made room for you on the elevator, even when it was packed. And he looked at you like you were the first good thing that had ever happened to him.
So maybe it wasn't a shocker that you fell for him. Maybe it was just fate.
Clark and you had become fast friends from the first day you'd landed the job at the Daily Planet. His desk was right across from yours, making it easy to just turn to each other and chat. Clark lit up a room with his bright, dorky smile and his boyish charm.
There was something so special about Clark. You knew it even before you fell hard for him. Clark had such a gentle, kind heart. The kind that's not just worn on a sleeve, but rather worn everywhere. If there was ever some argument about justice or truth, he was the first to defend it. The first to defend the innocent, the helpless.
It was infuriating, sometimes. How someone could be so good and soft and sincere without it being some kind of act. And it made the nagging suspicion in the back of your mind that much worse.
Because there was something else. Something you couldn’t quite explain.
Like how Clark seemed to vanish the second anything chaotic happened. How his clothes always had that faint singed smell, like he’d walked too close to a lightning strike. How sometimes, just sometimes, you’d catch him staring at the television in the breakroom right as some new reporter spoke about Superman. It was the way he listened so intensely that caught your attention.
You weren’t trying to snoop. Truly, you weren’t. You just noticed things. Small things. Quiet things. Things other people overlooked because Clark Kent was so.. unassuming.
But you noticed. And you were starting to connect the dots.
“Do you think Superman is just some regular Joe?” You asked, spinning in your chair as you avoided your computer screen. Sports column. Oh, how you hated when Perry gave you the damned sports column.
Clark's head whipped over to you, his face an expression you couldn't quite read. “Sorry?”
“Like.. do you think he just has some boring old day job like us?” You continued, the pen in your hand clicking over and over. “I mean, what does Superman do when he isn't.. super.”
Clark chuckled nervously, you noted. “I… guess I never thought about it.”
You clicked your pen, once, twice. “I mean, he’s always around when big stuff happens. But in between? He’s gotta eat, right? Pay rent?”
“I suppose so,” he said slowly, voice just the tiniest bit too tight. “I don’t think Superman has to worry about rent.”
“No rent,” you repeated. “Right. Because he’s what? Crashing at a super secret lair no one knows about?”
Clark cleared his throat. “Uh. Maybe.”
You finally looked at him, raising a brow. He was doing that thing again—adjusting his glasses like they were a nervous tic, fidgeting with the edge of his sleeve, not quite meeting your eyes. You leaned your elbow on your desk, resting your chin in your hand. “What do you think Superman eats for breakfast?”
“I don’t know,” Clark muttered, clearly flustered. “Toast?”
“Toast,” you echoed, trying not to smile. “The Man of Steel eats toast.”
Clark shrugged. “Everyone eats toast. I eat toast. I love toast.”
You tilted your head, watching him carefully. “You’re sweating.”
He blinked. “It’s.. hot in here.”
It wasn’t. You both knew it. But he was already ducking his head, pretending to refocus on his screen, the tips of his ears turning suspiciously red.
Huh. Very interesting.
You didn’t let the topic drop, no, not yet. You could see the way Clark’s fingers hovered stiffly over his keyboard, typing nothing.
“Okay, toast,” you said, twirling your pen between your fingers. “But what about coffee? You think Superman takes it black? Or is he secretly the type to order something ridiculous with oat milk and whipped cream?”
Clark glanced at you from the corner of his eye, lips twitching like he wanted to smile but was scared of what might come out. “Probably black,” he said. “He’s efficient.”
You snorted. “That’s boring.”
“Maybe he likes boring.”
“Maybe he pretends to.”
That earned you a real smile—crooked, boyish, so bright it made your stomach do a little flip. And just like that, the teasing slipped out before you could stop it.
“You know,” you said, resting your chin in your palm again, “you smile just like him.”
Clark froze. Like actually froze. He looked like a baby deer in headlights.
For a second you thought maybe he’d short-circuited. His eyes widened behind his glasses, his mouth half-open like he was trying to think of a word that didn’t exist yet.
“I—what?” he stammered.
You bit your lip, half enjoying this, half swooning at how adorably flustered he was. “Superman,” you clarified, tapping your pen against your notepad. “You kinda smile like him.”
“I don’t—” he shook his head, letting out a breathy laugh, “I mean, that’s—he’s—I’m—that’s not—”
“You okay over there?” you asked, raising a brow.
“I just—no one’s ever said that before.”
“Why not? You’ve got that same thing. Like…” You waved vaguely toward his face. “Hopeful. Heroic. Like you’re trying to save a kitten stuck in a tree with your eyes.”
He made a strangled sound, somewhere between a laugh and a cough. “You’re—uh. Very observant.”
“Occupational hazard,” you said sweetly.
He looked like he was trying to melt into his chair. You were pretty sure if he was Superman, he’d have flown straight through the ceiling to escape this conversation. You smiled to yourself, eyes flicking back to your half-written sports column.
Interesting, indeed.
There were more times that Clark seemed to get oddly strange about Superman. Like when you said he was tall enough to be Superman and he spit out his coffee. Or when you said his hair was curly like Superman and he tried to say his hair was just wavy.
You really weren’t trying to torture him. Not intentionally. It was just.. so easy. And kind of adorable. It was also a good way to test your suspicion.
Like this morning, when you caught him watching the news broadcast from a rooftop rescue the night before. Superman had carried an entire bus off a collapsing bridge—again—and you’d found Clark standing by the breakroom TV, arms crossed, brows furrowed in concern like he was the one who’d pulled it off and was now second-guessing the landing.
You leaned against the doorway, sipping your coffee. “Think he ever gets tired of saving the world?”
Clark jumped, like you’d caught him stealing. “Who?”
You grinned. “Superman.”
“Oh. Uh. Probably not. I mean.. it’s kind of his thing, right?”
“Maybe.” You tilted your head. “Or maybe he’s just really tired and doesn’t let anyone know.”
Clark looked at you then. Really looked. It was like he was scanning for something beneath the surface of your words. You didn’t flinch. You were starting to enjoy this little dance a little too much.
You took another sip and added, “If he ever wanted to take a day off, I’m sure the world would survive. One day without Superman wouldn’t kill us.”
Clark swallowed thickly, turning back to the TV. “I don’t know about that.”
You stepped beside him, shoulder brushing his arm, and leaned in just enough to make his breath catch. “I think it would. Kill you, I mean. You’d go crazy not being able to help.”
He turned to you again, blinking rapidly. “Why would I—?”
“If you were Superman, I mean,” You replied instantly. “It would kill you to not go a day without helping. Seems like you and our Kryptonian have that in common.”
You and Clark always liked to have pasta night. It wasn’t a date. At least, not officially. It was just something you did after those long, soul-draining Daily Planet days, when the world felt too loud and the newsroom felt too full of egos and deadlines and bad coffee. Pasta night was the safe zone. Laughter over stovetop steam. Old movies on the TV. Clark humming as he chopped garlic with annoyingly perfect knife skills.
Tonight, after a tragically long day trailing Cat Grant around while she whispered office secrets like she was auditioning for Gossip Girl, you were practically crawling to Clark's apartment.
It was locked, unfortunately. But it was so late, so you weren't sure why he wasn't home. Thankfully, Clark kept a spare key under the mat, a terrible hiding spot in a city like Metropolis, but very on-brand for someone who still believed in the good in people. You grabbed it, unlocked the door, and slid it right back where it belonged.
“Clark?” you called softly, just in case.
Confirmed: not home. Lights off. No rustle of movement from the bedroom. No familiar clatter in the kitchen. It was quiet in the way that felt wrong. Clark’s apartment was never silent. It always hummed with soft music, the occasional kettle on the stove, the warm shuffle of him padding around barefoot.
You checked your phone. 7:03 p.m. Weird.
You stepped inside anyway, shutting the door behind you and locking it with a quiet click. His apartment was tidy, as usual, but lived-in. Cozy. A blanket still draped over the arm of the couch from the last time you'd watched movies together. A pair of glasses on the coffee table. His laptop still open on the dining table, half a document glowing on the screen.
You dropped your bag by the door and took off your shoes. Something just felt so off about this.
You wandered to the window, peeking out at the skyline. The familiar neon glow of Metropolis buzzed in the distance. Traffic rolled steady. People moved like ants below. But the longer you sat in the quiet, the more the nothing started to feel like something.
And the more you were sure, without a doubt, that Clark Kent was hiding something.
After about fifteen minutes, the front door opened. You turned your head around, ready to question your friend about why he was out so late like a worried mother. Then, you saw it. That unmistakable S symbol on his chest. Not just on his chest, but on his suit. Superman's suit.
That was Superman.
Or.. no. It was Clark. Same height. Same shoulders. Same eyes. But the glasses were gone. The tie was gone. The soft sweater and rolled sleeves were gone. And in their place: the suit.
For a second, he didn’t see you. He had one hand on the doorknob, shoulders sagging with exhaustion, jaw tight. He looked like he’d just flown through hell and back. His suit was scuffed, a tear at the shoulder, a faint smear of soot across his cheek.
Once he turned around, his eyes widened when he saw you. His whole body stilled, like his mind was catching up to what his heart already knew; he’d been caught.
“Are you hurt?”
You didn't expect those to be the first words from your mouth. Maybe a scold, anger because how could he keep such a secret from you? But for some reason, your worry and care for him made the words tumble from your lips before you could even think about saying anything else.
Clark shook his head, “No, no. I-I'm okay. What.. are you doing here? How'd you even get in?”
“Don't worry about that,” you shrugged his question off. “You look tired.”
“Fights are still tiring,” Clark replied, giving you a soft, crooked smile. He sounded breathless. Whether from the fight or the fact that you were standing there, in his apartment, seeing him.. you couldn’t tell.
You nodded to the couch. “Sit down, Clark.” He hesitated, then obeyed, lowering himself with a quiet exhale. You sat beside him, close enough to feel the warmth coming off his skin, but not quite touching.
For a moment, neither of you said anything. The quiet stretched between you, soft and charged and full of everything you hadn’t asked yet.
Finally, you broke it. “Were you going to keep it from me forever?”
Clark stared down at his hands. “I didn’t know how to tell you. Every time I tried, it felt like I’d be asking you to see me differently. And I didn’t want to lose the way you look at me now.”
“I see you the same,” you instantly assured. “The way I look at it? You aren't Superman. Superman is Clark.” He perked up at your words, just a fraction, but you caught it. “That heart of yours is a Clark Kent heart that Superman represents.”
He opened his mouth, closed it again, then finally said, “Sometimes I feel like Superman is who I have to be. But Clark…” He looked down again, voice gentler. “Clark’s the real me. The part I hoped someone might love, even if the rest of the world only ever sees the cape.”
Your breath caught. And before you could stop yourself, your hand reached out to rest on top of his. The word fell from your lips again, like some sort of mind control or truth serum:
“I already do, Clark.”
His gaze snapped to yours.
“I already love that part of you.”
For a beat, neither of you moved. Then, slowly, tentatively, he laced his fingers through yours. You could feel the shift in the air between you. Something unspoken settling into place. The kind of silence that isn’t awkward, but sacred.
Clark looked at you like you were unreal. “I’ve wanted to tell you for so long,” he murmured. “But I was scared. Not of what you’d think of Superman.. but of what you’d think of me.”
“Clark,” you whispered, “I’ve been falling for you since the first time you offered me coffee and spilled half of it on your own shirt.” Your words made him chuckle airly, a sound that always made you smile in return.
His free hand came up, hesitant at first, fingertips brushing your cheek, then settling softly at your jaw like he was still asking permission. When you didn't back away, he leaned in slowly like a moment stretched thin with meaning, like he wanted to savor every second before it broke.
And then, his lips met yours.
He kissed you like you were fragile and eternal all at once—like he didn’t want to overwhelm you, but he needed you to know. Needed you to feel everything he hadn’t been able to say.
You kissed him back, and he melted into it—like the tension he carried every day, in every fight, in every lie, finally had somewhere to go.
When you pulled away, just barely, your foreheads rested together.
You whispered, breath warm against his lips, “Hi.”
Clark smiled, eyes still closed. “Hi.” After a moment, he spoke again. "Gosh, I've dreamed about doing that for months now.”
“Live up to your expectations?”
“Beat them significantly.”
You grinned, cheeks warm, still close enough to feel his breath fan across your lips. “Significantly, huh?”
He nodded solemnly. “Astronomically.”
You let out a soft laugh. “That’s a pretty high bar. I hope I don’t disappoint you on the second kiss.”
Clark blinked, momentarily stunned, then gave the goofiest, most love-struck smile you’d ever seen. “There’s going to be a second kiss?”
“I mean.. I hope there's going to be a second kiss,” you answered. “Right now, preferably.”
With a small laugh, Clark leaned in. The kiss was passionate, but more natural, casual than the first one. The kind of kiss you could imagine sharing after a long day of work or in passing.
And when you finally broke apart, barely a breath between you, you couldn’t stop smiling.
“I should probably change out of the super suit,” he murmured, voice low and teasing. “Kind of ruins the whole normal guy vibe I’ve been going for.”
You gave him a once-over. “Mm. I don’t know. It’s growing on me. Seeing it this close is kind of amazing.”
He flushed instantly. “Don’t say things like that. I might have a heart attack.”
You leaned in one last time and whispered, lips brushing his, “That’d be kind of impressive, considering your heart’s, you know.. bulletproof.”
He laughed, bright and helpless, and you swore you felt it in your chest. And in that quiet, wrapped in warmth and half-lit shadows and truth finally spoken, it felt like the world could pause. Just for a little while.
Because this wasn’t about Superman. This was about him. It had always been about him.
#auroral writing#auroralwriting#dcu#dc comics#superman#superman movie#superman x reader#superman x you#clark kent#clark kent x reader#clark kent x you#kal el#dc fanfic#superman 2025#david corenswet
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Imagine being Sylus' non-mc fiance. Hidden Child au. part2
Imagine meeting you was never part of the plan.
Imagine he walked into that club on a whim. He hadn't stepped into a place like that in years. It wasn't his kind of scene anymore. But Mephisto had been running his mouth about something in Zone N109's underbelly, about a person worth watching. So Sylus went. Not because he cared. But because something about the way Mephisto kept talking made him want to shut him up.
Imagine seeing you. He didn't catch your name. Not at first. Just a blur of tired eyes, practiced laughter, that hollow sound people wore like armor. You looked like someone who had learned how to survive not to live, just survive.
Imagine he wasn't supposed to get involved. But then you looked at him. And he stopped. Completely.
Imagine he didn't know why he brought you home. He didn't know why he stayed after the first night when it had always been just one and done. But when the sun started to rise and you stirred under the sheets, Sylus found himself watching you breathe. And before he could stop himself, he said the words. "I need a lover."
Imagine you looked half asleep, confused. Still dreaming, maybe. But you said yes. And Sylus felt something tighten in his chest.
Imagine he didn't understand it. He didn't want to understand it. But something about the way you agreed so quietly, so unflinchingly felt like the beginning of something he couldn't name.
Imagine maybe it was instinct. Maybe it was fate. But he gave you his name. Left you his black card. Told you to quit your job and wait for him. And two nights later you did.
Imagine years passed. Sylus kept you close. You were at his side at galas, exhibitions, political dinners. You smiled when you had to, played your role to perfection. Wore everything he gave you. The diamonds, the silk, the title.
Imagine you never asked for more. But he saw it. In your silences. In the way your eyes lingered when he wasn't looking. You didn't just play the part. You were waiting. For something. For him. And Sylus, heartless, calculated Sylus didn't know how to give you what you wanted. So he gave you what he could. Everything but love.
Imagine the night it changed.
Imagine you were curled up on the couch in his office, asleep again. Waiting for him to finish work. The storm outside was relentless, thunder shaking the windows. But you were still. Peaceful. And something broke inside him.
Imagine he stood there for too long, staring. Realizing. If you ever left, he wouldn't survive it. So he walked over. Pressed a kiss to your forehead. Sat beside you and, for once, stayed until morning.
Imagine he always thought he'd know when it happened that falling in love would feel like lightning, or fire, or blood. Something violent. Something impossible to ignore. But it didn't.
Imagine it felt like this. You standing in his office, biting your lip, eyes lowered in guilt because you touched that painting. The one he told you not to. The only thing in the room he had once considered untouchable. "You touched it?" You flinched. "No- well yes..." He narrowed his eyes. "What did I tell you-?" "It was an accident! I didn't mean to-" You cut yourself off, lips pressing shut. As if you were swallowing more than just words. Something about the way your hands curled into fists. Like you were protecting someone. You always did that. Even when it wasn't smart.
Imagine in that moment, Sylus knew it wasn't just the painting. It was you covering for those goddamn twins, wasn't it? He should've been mad. He was mad, in a way. But not at the painting. Not at you.
Imagine he was angry at the part of him that hesitated. The part of him that looked at you. Wide eyed, apologetic, still standing in the same room with the same warmth you always carried and couldn't bring himself to yell. He didn't want to hurt you. Not even with words. And that scared the hell out of him.
"I see." You looked up. "Look, Sylus- I'm really sorry-" "Get out." You froze. "Don't come into my office for a while." Your shoulders dropped. And for the first time in years, Sylus regretted something immediately after saying it. Because he saw how it broke you a little. And that was when it hit him.
Imagine he loved you. Not because you were perfect. Not because you played your role flawlessly. But because you touched the one thing he thought he'd never let go of and instead of rage, all he felt was fear.
Imagine the fear that you might think he loved someone else more. Fear that he might lose you over it. Fear that the past might have the power to hurt you. He sat with that fear for days. For a week, exactly. And then he removed the painting.
Imagine a week later, you walk into the office again. He barely looked up from his desk, but he saw you pause. Saw your eyes search the wall. "Where's the painting?" You blurted, and then instantly winced. Sylus leaned back in his chair. Calm. Controlled. Heart beating faster anyway. "I had it removed." You looked at him like he just confessed to murder. "What? Why?"
"It doesn't fit the style of the room." He said smoothly, voice level. "Don't you think?" You blinked. "We- well yes..." His office was all deep wood and shadow, the kind of place people whispered about. The painting never matched. He just kept it because... Because it used to matter. But not more than you. "Shall we go look for a replacement?" You blinked again. "I'm sorry- what?" "The painting. Let's find another one."
Imagine he didn't tell you it was because of you. That he couldn't stand the idea of you walking into this room and being reminded you didn't come first. He just stood, adjusting his cufflinks. "Also, Luke and Kieran said there's a new restaurant nearby." "...Sylus, are you asking me out?" There was a pause. A long one. Then. "Aren't you my fiancée?" He asked, brow raised like it was the most natural thing in the world. "There's no need to state the obvious." Your jaw dropped. Again. Sylus almost smiled.
Imagine Sylus realizing quietly, fully that he would burn his past to the ground if it meant you stayed. That this wasn't about paintings, or power, or control. It was about you. He loved you. And for the first time in his life he wasn't afraid of it.
Imagine the way the past came back. MC. They said she was alive. Impossible. Sylus remembered the grave. The cold hand. The dirt beneath his nails. The silence that came after her death. The way it hollowed him out. So who the hell was this woman claiming to be her?
Imagine he didn't tell you. He couldn’t. Things between you had just started to shift. You smiled more. Laughed around him. Touched him without flinching. You were finally letting him in. And he was finally reaching back. He couldn't risk losing that. So he investigated alone.
Imagine letting MC in. He didn't believe her.
but Imagine if pretending to care meant uncovering the truth then so be it. He let her believe. Let her call him love again. Let her think she was winning.
Imagine all while keeping you in the dark. Because you were different. You were real. And if he could just end it cleanly, silently... He could return to you. He could fix what he hadn't even realized was broken.
Imagine she asked him to kill you. Just like that. Like it was nothing. His blood went cold. She said it sweetly. Too sweetly. Like a test. Like she already knew what he'd say. Sylus laughed. Told her it was already done. That it was handled. She believed him. But in his mind, he was already planning her death.
Imagine by the time he had taken care of it, it was too late. You found out. You ran. And Sylus had tore the city apart looking for you. Sent his men. Called in every favor. Burned connections he'd spent decades building. But you were gone. Gone like smoke. Gone like vengeance.
Imagine he would've traded everything just to see you again. Just to tell you it wasn't what it looked like. That he loved you. That it had always been you.
Imagine nearly dying changed nothing. There was a hit. A trap. A bullet in the spine. And then, nothing. Four years. Four fucking years in a coma. And when he woke up, everything had moved on. Except him.
and Imagine you were still gone.
Imagine being dragged to a gala. Some formal garbage he didn't want to be part of. The suit was old. The tie loose. The glass of wine untouched. He was halfway out the door when something small collided with his leg. A child. Crying. Hood pulled low. Tiny hands over his forehead.
Imagine Sylus didn't care for kids. Never had. But something made him stop. Made him kneel. Made him look. And when the boy looked up with wide red eyes. Sylus stopped breathing.
Imagine realizing the truth. His eyes. Your hair. His blood. His son.
Imagine you appeared. Frantic. Breathless. Alive. You called to the boy. Rushed to him. Knelt beside him and checked his hands, his face. Pulled down the hood. And Sylus couldn't move. You looked at him. Really looked. And didn't recognize him.
"Sorry." You said gently. "I hope he didn't give you trouble...?" He answered, voice cracked. "Sylus." You blinked. "Right. Sylus." Like it was nothing more than a name. "Then if you'll excuse us." You added, guiding the boy by the hand. And you walked away.
Imagine the way Sylus stood there for minutes. Hours. Maybe years.
Imagine he had murdered kings. Crushed empires. Ripped the heart out of anyone who dared touch what was his. But for the first time. He didn't know what the hell to do. Because he had just seen everything he had ever loved and you looked at him like he was already dead.
[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2025°
: I deliver his pov.
#dark night hero#live laugh love lads#lads x reader#lads x you#lads x y/n#lads au#lads imagine#lads sylus#lads x non!mc reader#sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus x y/n#sylus imagine#sylus taguan ng anak au#love and deepspace#love and deepspace x reader#love and deepspace x you#love and deepspace imagine#love and deepspace sylus#lnds sylus#sylus#sylus l&ds#sylus love and deepspace#sylus lnds#sylus lads
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❝ You can’t make her fall for you even in a year. ❞
<𝟑 .ᐟ when Gojo Satoru takes on a reckless challenge, a simple game turns into something far more complicated. But not all feelings come without a cost.
𖹭.ᐟ p2 -> here // mlist. -> here
“Let alone a month? Impossible.”
Geto had said, sipping his drink with that knowing smirk of his — just enough to needle Gojo, to fuel him the way only he could.
The challenge hit the air like a spark against gasoline.
Gojo tilted his head, all swagger and ease, flashing a grin sharp enough to cut glass.
“This’ll be a piece of cake. Watch me.”
Everyone in their year knew you. Or rather, they knew of you. Quiet, solitary, with a stare that could silence a room and a voice so rarely heard, it felt like a secret. You sat alone at lunch. Read between classes. Moved like mist through the halls — untouchable. Unbothered. And you didn’t like noise, or crowds, or arrogance — the very things Gojo Satoru practically bled.
You were also striking. Not in the curated, social media kind of way. No, yours was the kind of beauty that demanded nothing. Magnetic. Natural. Elusive. The kind people looked at twice, even when you tried to disappear.
It was supposed to be a game.
The first day, he found you tucked beneath a tree between buildings, a book open in your lap and your headphones in. He approached with his usual bravado — lazy smile, hands shoved into his pockets, sunglasses hanging low on the bridge of his nose. A practiced flick of hair, a sparkle of teeth.
“You know,” he said, voice cocky, “I'm jealous of that book. You're always staring at it.”
You looked up slowly. Then — you smiled. Not big. Not bright. But real.
“Dummy,” you said and turned a page.
That smile stuck with him longer than it should’ve.
The days blurred after that. Every morning became a new experiment in seeing that smile again. He slid into the seat next to yours before class, just to read his horoscope aloud:
“Apparently I’m fated to have a mysterious romance with someone who hates fun. Sound familiar?”
He brought you coffee — black, no sugar, just how you took it, of course he did his homework about you. He quoted lines from your favorite author (he stayed up late the night before memorizing them). He lingered at the vending machine between periods because you always passed through at 10:15.
Once, during a sudden downpour, you shared your umbrella with him, both of you pressed close beneath the shallow canopy. Your hand brushed his. Neither of you moved.
But what disarmed him wasn’t your beauty. It was you.
You weren’t cold. You weren’t aloof. You were thoughtful. Dry-humored. The kind of clever that came without arrogance. You asked questions when he spoke, even when he was being ridiculous. You remembered things he hadn’t meant to say.
And you made him laugh. Not his usual performative kind, but a real, breathless, rib aching laugh he hadn’t known he’d missed.
He still cracked jokes. He still wore his sunglasses indoors and teased Nanami until he got that quiet glare in response. But when he was around you, he slowed down. Spoke softer. Listened harder. Sometimes, he didn’t even try to impress you — just sat near you in the courtyard while you read, the silence between you both soft and weightless.
One afternoon, he offered to carry the stack of books you’d borrowed from the library. You paused, eyes flicking to his hands like you weren’t used to people offering. Then you handed them over without a word. At your dorm door, as you took them back, your fingers grazed his.
That night, he lay awake in bed replaying that brush of contact, wondering if you’d felt it too —or if he was just losing his mind.
He stopped talking about the bet. Stopped joking about it with Geto. Stopped needing to prove anything.
There was a look in your eyes now — calm. Trusting. He didn’t want to break. Ever.
You made him feel seen. Not as the loudmouth rich prodigy. Just as a boy. A boy who didn’t quite know what to do with the weight in his chest when you looked at him like that.
So when the thirtieth day came — though he hadn’t counted in weeks — he asked you to meet him on the rooftop.
The city was dipped in gold. The sun was just beginning to fall. It was quiet up there. Open sky, gentle wind. Your kind of peace.
You sat beside him on the ledge, legs dangling, your shoulder brushing his. You talked. About everything and nothing. The color of the sky. The taste of that strawberry flavored gum you hated.
He cracked a dumb joke — something about marrying you just to create a tiny version of himself that would terrorize the world with your face and his attitude.
You laughed. Harder than he expected. You leaned into him without thinking.
He turned toward you — really turned this time. Looked at you like you were something sacred, memorizing your features as if committing them to memory.
“I’m in love with you,”
He murmured, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear, hand lingering just a moment longer than necessary.
Your gaze dipped to his mouth. Eyes half-lidded. The breath between you two thinned.
“I know, i...”
You whispered and leaned in. Just as his lips grazed yours—
Crack.
The slap echoed in the quiet. Not harsh. Not angry. Just… decisive.
Gojo blinked. His cheek stung, but that wasn’t what hurt.
You stepped back. Calm. Poised. The soft edge of your voice sharpened with finality.
“I know,” you said again, voice steady as ever. “The bet’s over now. You can drop the act.”
Then you turned and walked away. No parting glance. No trembling. No explanation.
Just the quiet click of the rooftop door closing behind you and the echo of your absence ringing louder than anything else.
For the first time in his life, Gojo Satoru sat in silence, no grin , no comeback—
Alone with the weight of his own heart.
You knew from the very start. That’s why you played along — because it was a challenge for you too: to shatter his ego, piece by piece, with a smile.
The sunset dimmed behind you, fading just as you did — from his game, from his reach, from him.
That slap didn’t hurt, Gojo thought — because as your hand struck his cheek, he could feel that you were the one hurting more.
And because he knew — deep in that quiet part of himself — that he was the reason for your pain, he felt the burn rise until it slipped down his cheeks.
#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#jjk x reader#gojo satoru x reader#jjk#angst#jjk angst#faye!writes
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gojo had a dream you died.
it was partially the reason why he woke up in a cold sweat… it was horrid.
he could still hear your screams, the life leaving your eyes, but more importantly, he remembered your final words that were murmured to him. “satoru, don’t… cry, i’ll be okay, it’ll be okay.” and he believed you, that everything would be okay. despite tears filling his eyes, labeled the strongest at that moment, he couldn’t have ever felt so weak.
the dream felt so real, that was the scary part. he remembered each and every detail. from the feeling of you giving his wrist a light squeeze, the sweet smell of your natural scent.. the eerie sounds of your irregular wheezes as you were clinging on your final moments.
“don’t leave me,” he mutters, he remembers saying that. three simple words, yet his dilated pupils spoke a thousand. he started to repeat it. again and again as if it was a mantra. his words, his tone broke the more he spoke to you. that cute smile of yours never left your lips, it remained there. regardless of your inevitable incoming fate, he sobs, “you’re…you’re all i have left. i don’t wanna be left alone again, just stay. please, baby.”
“i’m not going anywhere, ‘toru,” you’d reassure him, a single tear drop of his falls onto your cheek.
after that moment, gojo wakes up. trembling, yet the dream wasn’t that feared him the most. it was him waking up with you not next to him..
cold, everything felt cold.
he shot up immediately from his dream. the cold sweat that forever continued to race down his back as he panted.
he was so used to your warmth taking up part of the bed. albeit, in this case though. it felt empty,
isolated.
it was near the middle of the night, gojo was drowsy, rubbing his eyes to blind his vision with imaginary stars. feeling for the bed, it was frigid.
“baby?” he’d grumble, white lashes partially open. silence called back to him, if it was anything about gojo, he hated being alone.
oh, he loathed it,
yet whenever you came into his life—he didn’t have to worry about that. you were always besides him, no matter what.
until now.
it takes him a split second before it dawns on him. your fatal death, it wasn’t another one of his silly surreal dreams. it was nothing but mere reality.
a breath gets caught in his throat once he realizes, being brought back into harsh realness. you were gone.
it’s been years, speaking of which…
it was your anniversary with him. the same exact day he proposed to you. he remembers it vividly, getting down on one knee with the goofiest grin. he didn’t even say, “will you marry me..?” instead, he snorts a sheepish, “let’s get married, heh.”
“i always forget around this time,” gojo sighs to himself with a soft tone, his voice was a bit raspy from abruptly waking up. intaking a sharp inhale, he goes towards your side of the bed and he reaches into his pocket.
“it should have been me,” and he doesn’t even care he’s talking to himself, it’s like for whatever reason, your presence was near him. “our marriage,” and then with a brief sniffle, he glances down at the ring you once wore proudly. he strokes it with a thumb before huffing out a shaky, “our marriage, it was supposed to last us for infinity…”
but it didn’t.
with hot tears streaming down his face and stuck a power he wished he’d never have, in the end, it couldn’t save you.
he couldn’t save you.
and now…
the strongest, the most brave to ever live and walk could easily be mistaken as the weakest.

#★vegasbaby.#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo x you#satoru gojo x reader#gojou satoru x reader#gojo angst#jjk angst#jujutsu kaisen angst#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk fic#jjk drabbles
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a request, if i may, of praising old man logan as he filfthly eats you out and it makes him combust the more you praise him? okay running away again
speak of her over my grave and watch how she brings me back to life
a/n: look at him taking off his glasses in absolute shock of this ask- no okay does old man logan have a praise kink? i would raise it higher and say every version of logan has a massive praise kink. this is a man who wants to know he's doing good in life. his love language is acts of service so he might get to hear a pretty thank you. also i'm not sorry for how feral this got. i have no explanation.
summary: he knew he loved you when your words begin to piece his heart back together. he knew he loved you when he flourishes at your praise. he knew he loved you when nothing in this world could matter but the sound of your voice telling him you love him too.
word count: 3k+
pairing: old man!logan x f!reader
warnings: EXPLICIT SO MINORS DNI, oral (f receiving), praise kink, logan is obsessed, dirty talk via reader, he is so pretty when he blushes, manhandling, cumplay, cumeating, overstimulation, crying, he's needy in this one, angst, tortured soul of an old man, reverence, religious trauma + greek mythology hints.
He can feel the strings of fate pull tight around his broken heart. In a failed attempt to draw him back together. To piece together an organ that barely beat for him anymore. He might have felt it once, before it broke. Before it gnarled itself like the branches of a dying tree, one half twisting away from the other in a desperate attempt of survival.
He deemed it a useless part of his body until you came along. You with your smile that held enough cloying sweetness to choke him as he stood helpless. Silently begging for you to say his name. To bring him back to life.
Whatever horrors that plagued his mind—endless nightmares that promised nothing but anguish—suddenly came crashing to a halt at the sight of you. So pretty in your denim jeans and velvet top. An angel seated in the center of a bar that held more filth than you deserved to be near. Logan couldn’t fathom that luck struck him this hard.
Not when death had already claimed his soul; notched yet another tally in the endless wall of people that came before.
He felt the dirt pack under his nails as he clawed his way out of the grave he put himself in. Years spent alone—a man lost to the ravages of time—had turned him bitter. With rough edges and biting words that stung far more than he intended. How could he believe he deserved to live after he contributed so much to the endless pool of blood that tainted his soul? How was he allowed such softness after biting off bits of brutality his whole life?
Logan was pretty sure he survived on borrowed time that had already run out. He could feel death breathe down his neck as the days went on. A reminder that what little of his life remained would be spent suffering. And he found that accepting it was easier than battling against the will of God, or whoever toyed with his lifeline.
It was far easier to die than find a reason to live.
Until you said his name.
Softly. Sweetly. Reverence wrapped in a tight grasp of need.
You brought him back from the edge—took his hand and refused to take no for an answer. You and the safety of your touch; the promise in your kiss. You dragged him into a life he didn’t earn; one that almost tasted too sweet—too sour.
After near a decade of being buried beneath the dirt, he felt himself collapse above ground and suck in his first real gasp of fresh air. Alive, once more. Hell spit him out with a vow of love and who was he to argue against it.
His fingers dug into your plush thighs, tugging them open to see what lay between. He marveled at their softness, eyes wide and awestruck at the sight of you spread beneath him. You practically glowed in the dim light of the bedside table. Yellow, musty, yet angelic when it caressed your body with its heavenly touch.
He wondered if this was real life; your nails digging sharply into his shoulders gave him the answer.
"Logan," you sighed, voice high with need.
The strings pulled taught. A vice like hold that drew him to you.
Maybe that's what this unutterable feeling was. The gnawing pit at the bottom of his heart. A greed he'd never indulged before—too afraid of what it might ask for next. He wasn't a man who asked for much. Rather someone that found himself far too content with nothing. But tonight he found his lips forming the words of a false prayer that his mother taught him as a child.
Hail the angel in his bed. Hail every good fucking thing you brought into his life.
His teeth sunk into your thigh, body jolting at your responding moan. Fingers dug into his hair, tugging at the mussed locks with a high pitched whine. You were a needy little thing, but Logan found he desperately wanted to be needed.
He smiled laving his tongue over the tender spot, working his way up to where you dripped for him.
So slick. So perfect.
Saliva filled his mouth. "What do ya want baby?"
Your chest heaved; he could feel the heat of your body under his palms. "Your m-mouth Logan."
His eyes trailed along your brow covered in a sheen of sweat. The room was thick with the humid air of the outside world. But that didn't deter him from craving your skin near his. The pressure of your thighs around his head a welcome weight. If he sunk his teeth in where the curve of your leg met your hip he knew he could draw out that soft choking noise he longed to hear on days spent driving alone.
If he had his way he'd crawl into you to seek your serenity straight from the source. He'd never divulge about the ache that chewed him up on the inside, but Logan wondered if you knew. Could you tell how much he craved you? How much he couldn't live without you.
When your glittering eyes met his, the resolve he spent years building cracked like glass. You peered into him as if he was a stained glass window. A god you were more than happy to worship.
"You want me to lick this pretty pussy?" Fuck, he sounded drunk off your taste already.
His mouth hovered over your throbbing clit, your scent now filling his senses. Overwhelming him with what he wanted most. But he needed to hear it. The lilt of your begging; the soft echo of your need that washed over him like soothing river water.
He couldn't live without it.
"Yes," you sobbed, thigh twitching.
The string sliced his heart open, blood pooling onto the white bed sheets. Oh what a sweet death your love made. Oh...what a bittersweet way to go.
He'd die right now if you asked him to. Hand over his heart on a silver platter if you so wished it. Maybe that made him far too gone for his own good, but Logan couldn't remember a time in his life where he got this. Safety. The hope of love burning far too bright and far too hot for him to fly near it.
Yet there he was. Icarus happily soaring in your sun like glow.
"I got ya honey," he murmured. "Gonna take care of what's mine."
You nodded frantically—tears welling up in your eyes. "You take care of me Logan."
The breath in his chest stuttered, eyes dark as the words fell past your swollen lips. He wanted to explain why his cock twitched against his stomach. Why he now leaked into the sheet with heavy panted breaths. But every time he came up short with the words needed to form an answer.
"Yeah I do sweetheart," he breathed. "Don't I?"
"Uh-huh."
"Take care of what belongs to me."
There was no warning when his hands dragged you closer with a rough tug, mouth closing over your clit with a desperate suck. A cry wrenched from your mouth, sparks sharply traveling down your spine. He licked through your slick with a growl. Hands an unbreakable press against your thighs.
The sight of your body bowed, mouth open for small gasped breaths that never came, snapped something in his mind. He was an old man. Well past his years. But the taste of your pussy along his tongue brought back a ferocity he often tamped down in his younger age. He felt the feral want claw at his chest, and answered it with a broken snarl.
Swallowing down every drop you gave him, he plunged his tongue into your entrance, thrusting messily until a smear of your shiny slick began to coat his mouth. It covered his cheeks and clung to the hair of his beard. He'd clean it out later, taste you on his tongue until he was aching for another go. But for now he was preoccupied with the way you cried for him.
"Oh fuck!" Your thighs trembled over his shoulders, hips canting down to drag yourself along his tongue. "So good."
He shuddered, eyes rolling back at the sound of your praise. You caught it within seconds, lips pulling into a breathless smile that left him gasping for air. His teeth nipped at your thigh briefly as his hips ground into the mattress below.
"You like that baby?" you breathed, thumb smearing your own slick against his cheek.
Something hot washed over his body. A needy sick and twisted ache that he'd never indulged in before. He wanted to be a good man to you; longed to be needed. And fuck if you didn't give him everything.
You were his walking wet dream. His future handed off and wrapped in a neat little bow.
"L-Love your tongue Logan-" A high gasp tore from your throat when he dived back in. Slurping at your clit with a heady moan as you dragged him closer. "Taking care of me so well."
His hips canted down into the bed, fucking his cock along the warmth of his stomach, as you gushed into his mouth again. Eyes zeroed in on your face, pupils dilated as he growled into your flesh. You no longer could see the man you loved, but the feral side he tamped down during the day. The animal he longed to release in your presence.
"Fuck I'm gonna cum."
His arms looped around your thighs and with a sharp yank, he had his face buried deep enough to suffocate himself. You sobbed an incoherent version of his name. Nails clawed at his shoulders, but Logan could feel the pulse of your clit under his tongue.
He sucked it into his mouth with a grunt, rolling it along his tongue as you trembled with the oncoming shocks of an orgasm that threatened to destroy you.
Tears dripped down your cheeks and Logan felt the satisfying part of his heart begin to stitch itself back together. The strings were tight enough to numb his pain. To quell the flare of agony.
That used to be all he knew, all he counted on most days. When there was nothing left and he'd propped the shovel in the dirt—his grave open and waiting—he stumbled right into your arms. He found his reason for living.
Heat curled around his spine as you shook with the impending orgasm—the stimulation on your clit practically debilitating. He grunted into your soaked flesh, eyes narrowed as he chased the release that pulled his stomach taut. But this wasn't for him to indulge in; this wasn't his pleasure.
So with a throaty moan you felt reverberate along your body, he scraped his teeth along your clit and watched as your body went stiff.
"Logan!" you cried, fingers scrambling for purchase on any part of him you could reach.
You gushed into his awaiting mouth, praises of it's so good, you're so good falling upon his ears like the whimpered prayers of a devout worshiper thanking your god.
"Taste so fuckin' good," he mumbled, drunk on what you gave him.
He didn't care that you were jolting with each pass of his tongue along your pussy. He didn't care that you were shocked with overstimulation, small broken cries of his name muffled by the press of your thighs against his ears. He licked at you until he couldn't breathe. Buried his tongue into your twitching entrance and sucked out your cum with a happy hum.
"P-Please." You tugged at his hair, pulling him off you with a sob. "I-I can't anymore Logan."
"'M not fuckin' finished," he said, eyes glazed and face coated in your slick.
You made a mess of his face. The light catching along where you spilled into his mouth and along his throat. And still he wanted more. He'd spend hours between your thighs, burning your skin with his beard, if it meant he could divulge in your sweetness.
"It hurts-"
A grunt rumbled in his chest, his arms tugging you back even as your feet kicked along his back. "Just one more honey. Yeah?"
You shook your head. "B-But-"
"Thought you said it was good."
"It is."
"Then lemme be good for you." He wanted to tell you that the world went quiet between your thighs. That all his grief, all his pain, lessened when you sobbed his name.
He wanted to show you the string that looped his heart to yours—the only thing keeping him alive—and thank you for bringing him back from the dead. But words weren't his forte. Violence had become the only tenderness he knew and you didn't deserve the rough edges of an old man. You should have more.
But when you let him touch you like this—caress your skin and lick between your folds—he felt as if he was a man who finally was worthy of someone as precious as you. He could pretend he didn't bear the brunt of a fucked up soul.
The weight on his chest lifted when your tear filled gaze met his and you nodded. Small, barely there, but it was enough for him to seal his mouth back over you with a ragged moan. Your body shook as his tongue slid through the seam of your pussy. The tip nudging against your clit—careful to draw the pleasure from your body slowly.
He didn't want to give you pain. His heart wouldn't survive that. But he was a broken man; someone who begged for more even as his teeth sunk into what was already given.
You were his meal. His sacrament in the midnight hours until dawn broke across the darkened sky. You were the other half of his soul.
How could he not indulge in your sweetened tang until his tongue went stiff?
"I love you," you sighed, eyes rolled back when he sucked at your pussy, a wet low moan echoing in the air. "My p-perfect husband."
The cold press of his wedding band against your thigh drove him over the edge. You weren't officially married. Didn't have the backyard wedding with a preacher to match. But Logan had placed a ring on your finger near a year ago, sliding one over his own with the vow of forever cemented in his words.
Even if that didn't mean much in the eyes of a god who abandoned him near a century ago.
"Oh-"
Your head tipped back, mouth dropping open as his fingers dipped into your wet heat. Thrusting lazily until he found the spongey patch along your walls—driving the pad of his middle finger into it with a needy moan.
He knew it wouldn't take long for you to fly off the edge of a second release. That didn't make watching you climb to that peak any less satisfying. The sight appeased his soul. It gave him a chance to breathe; let him know that after so much bad—after so much pain—he could do something good. He could bring you to the edge of pleasure and drag you over again and again.
He could finally be the man you believed he was.
Not the animal they created.
"C'mon," he muttered. Eyes fixed on the shape of your breasts as your body curved off the bed. Hips dragging along his face with a stunted cry.
A wail bounced off the walls, piercing his eardrums with the symphony of your cries. His fingers rapidly pumped into you with a squelch that had heat burning his cheeks—lips pulling your throbbing clit into his mouth as you broke. The climax slammed into you; battering your already swollen pussy.
Logan could feel his cock swell at the sight.
"Fuckin' perfect," he grunted, teeth bared as he clambered to his knees and wrapped his fist soaked in your slick around his leaking cock. "'M gonna cum sweetheart."
Your eyes fluttered open, fingers digging into his thigh. "Please. Wanna see it baby. Look so pretty when you cum Logan."
His chest tightened, body shaking while you watched in rapture as he fucked his fist rapidly. He wouldn't fucking last, could feel the burning consume his body, but something held him back. The string around his heart yanked him away from the edge, tearing a cry from his throat when his frustration peaked.
You could see it—the glimmer of need in his dark eyes. This wasn't the first time he longed for your words. It certainly wouldn't be the last.
So you spread your legs and sat up slowly—arms wrapping around his shoulders to bring his lips down to yours. A soft moan was muffled by your mouth; the peak of his release within reach. He could practically feel the tips of his fingers graze it.
"Cover my pussy baby," you mumbled into his mouth. "Be good for me and mark what's yours."
The growl came from the very bottom of his chest when he finally came. Your name was a bitten out snarl pressed to your mouth in an open mouth kiss as he spurted over his knuckles. He pumped his cock to milk every drop; eyes fixed on the way it covered the swollen lips of your pussy. Dripping down to your entrance that fluttered at the sight of his sweaty and crimson tinged face.
"I fuckin' love ya honey," he murmured, hand cupping your chin to drag your lips back to his. "Best thing that's happened in my life is you."
You smiled, thumbs pressing to his cheeks. "Love you too Logan."
Clutching you close, he felt the string go loose. The breath finally rushing back into his lungs at the sight of your eyes glowing with the kind of light that brought him back to the first day The night he met you in that shitty bar—alcohol the only thing on his mind until he saw you.
The night you spoke his name over his covered grave and dragged him back to life with a smile.
#logan howlett x f!reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x y/n#logan howlett smut#old man logan#my writing
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sylus is someone who always notices the scent of your perfume. he never truly understood the meaning of how smells are associated with memories until he caught a whisper of your sweet scent lingering on his jacket from when you hugged him goodbye last week. he caught himself chuckling to himself as he held the garment up to his nose.
or in the winter time when he ‘forgets’ his scarf, he knows that your perfume will always welcome him into a warm embrace. no matter what the weather, smelling you always feels like spring. he catches traces of it in the crisp breeze that blows past as you release the fragrance that you’ve been keeping so warm under your wool scarf.
he wouldn’t usually let you fend the cold, but sylus wanted to be selfish just this one time. you circle it around his neck, making sure to pull it up so it covers his nose. you cup his cheeks, letting the warmth of your hands heat them up before landing a kiss right on his forehead.
“you’ve been forgetting your scarf a lot more huh?” he closes his eyes and inhales through his nose. the bright citrusy notes of your perfume, mixed in with your body’s pheromones is something sylus will never forget, even in his next life. that’s how he’ll find you, time and time again.
“i guess you’re rubbing off on me, kitten.”
there was another time where sylus took you to a path that overlooked the city of linkon. the perfect end cap to your date. you felt his warmth as his held you from behind. you went to lean your head back, only to remember that you had put your hair into a claw clip. he could only laugh as he watched you pout.
“may i?” he effortlessly freed your hair from the confines of your clip and like clock work, a gust of wind blew past the two of you. that scent once again permeated all his senses, he couldn’t help but smile as he buried his nose into your neck. you tried to push him away as his breath was tickling you, but he only pulled you closer. sylus wasn’t much of a laugher, but he couldn’t help it when he was with you. whether was due to your clumsiness or just the way you were as a person, his cheek muscles were always sore the next day.
a deep content sigh left your lips as you accepted your fate. you raked your fingers through his hair, feeling the way he relaxed against you.
“my silly little dragon.”
and oh was it bittersweet when you were away on a mission and sylus caught hints of citrus and neroli on his sheets. he wanted nothing more than to hold you in his arms and bask in your presence. but instead, he opted for trading his pillow out with yours. he tossed his pillow on the other side of the bed, long forgotten. he turned onto his stomach, fully face planting into the plush goose feather. oh how he missed you. his shoulders relaxed as he let out a deep exhale, now adjusting so his arm was hugging the pillow beneath him. what an insufferable 8 hours until you were back home. though, in no time at all did he find himself drifting back into dreamland, hoping to find you in his arms when he woke back up.
his sleep was often empty, void of dreams. but for whatever reason he found himself walking amongst a field filled with mandarin trees. the scent was familiar but it felt like it was missing something. he walked through the fields for what felt like forever trying to find what it was, but to no avail. deciding to rest, he took shelter under the biggest tree using its long branches for shade. he closed his eyes trying to envision what this missing piece was. it was always right on the tip of his tongue, but whenever he thought got close, the feeling would just disappear.
the sound of rustling leaves and branches brought the dragon peace. sylus didn’t even notice that he had dozed off until he was awakened by a familiar smell. that smell. but he was stiff and it was dark. he tried screaming, but his voice was caught in his throat.
“sylus.. up… my love.. wake up.”
his eyes shot open only to be met with your warm concerned ones. your hand was resting on his cheek, stroking it gently trying to get him to calm down. his breathing slowly evened out as he came back to reality.
“did you have a bad dream?” you were in your pajamas and it was dark outside. he could’ve sworn he wasn’t asleep for that long. you pulled him into your chest, using your fingers to lightly scratch the back of his neck how he likes.
“i’m sorry i was away for so long, but i’m home now.” he instinctively nuzzled into your chest, pulling you impossibly close.
home.
“that’s what was missing…” a curious hum left your lips as you placed a few kisses on his temple.
“what was that, dear?”
“nothing, i’m just glad that you’re home.”
(nest - seville orange is the perfume i’m referencing :p hehe iykyk)
#perfume on a scarf just scratches an itch in my brain LMFAO#this was proofread maybe 3 times so apologies for any typos#love and deepspace#lads#lnds#sylus#lads sylus#sylus qin#qin che#love and deepspace sylus#lnds sylus#love and deepspace x reader#lads x reader#lnds x reader#sylus x reader#lads sylus x reader#lnds sylus x reader#love and deepspace sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus fluff
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the alchemy
Mob!Bucky x Reader
Run-through: About a decade ago you left your home and ran away, looking for a fresh start after having had your heart broken by the boy you loved. Now you’re back and turns out Bucky Barnes – the same man who once broke your heart – is adamant on tormenting you some more. But why? Why does he want you back at all cost when he was the one who once pushed you away and crushed your heart like it meant nothing to him? What secrets has he been keeping for almost a decade? Most importantly, what truly happened that night he broke your heart?
Themes: forced marriage/marriage of convenience, angst, mob!bucky, metal arm, fluff, smut, possessive!bucky, childhood friends-to-enemies-to-lovers trope, bratty!reader, mentions of violence, explicit language, slow burn-ish, HEA
a/n: new mob!bucky pics dropped–

“I do.” You said in a sombre voice, with blood dripping from the cut on your lip as you sealed your fate and married your worst enemy.
Bucky’s face was bleeding too, your nails had done some damage earlier when you both got into a physical altercation like wild animals. You nearly smirked when you realised he looked worse than you did.
Then again you both looked like you went through hell as you stood here, at this makeshift altar, in the middle of what used to be the foyer of your father’s mansion before Bucky and his men shot at it until it was nothing but rubble, broken glass, and cracked marble.
Messy hair. Cuts and bruises all over your bodies. Dishevelled clothes. Your white jumpsuit had your own bloodstains on it, and his all black suit was torn in certain places. But he looked every bit the man they say he is. Dangerous. Cold, dark presence. The large bruise on his jaw was beginning to get darker now, thanks to the many punches from you. His near shoulder length hair was surprisingly looking neat. It pissed you off.
You looked like a mess too. And for a brief second, as his blue eyes looked down at your throat, you knew he could see a matching bruise forming around your neck from when he’d pinned you down to the floor earlier with that damned metal arm.
No one was dead, none of your people and none of his. Thankfully. But right now, as you married the man standing in front of you, you felt dead inside.
“You may now kiss the bride.” Was all you heard and you remained still as Bucky grabbed you by the waist and pulled you into him.
You resisted for a moment, but then he pulled you harder until your chests collided and you had no choice but to remain pressed against him. “I’m tired of these games, princess.” He hissed in a lowered voice, looking down at you with his merciless blue eyes.
You stared back at him with equal contempt. “You’re gonna regret this, Barnes.” You sneered, in a hushed voice. Not that the injured family members and men surrounding you – both his men and your father’s guards who stood and watched the show in disbelief and shock would mind the disrespect for each other in both your tones – but you didn’t want to add to the ridiculousness of this situation.
“Oh?” He taunted with a faint smirk. Only then did you notice the small cut on his upper lip. It brought you a little solace. “You’re my wife now, you will do as I say.”
The bitterness in your tone matched his as you said, “We’ll see about that, husband.”
You could tell he’d accepted the unspoken challenge, and he would do anything to win. After all, everything was a game to Bucky Barnes. He didn’t care who he used, who he manipulated, or who he tossed aside. He paraded around like he owned this world and everything and everyone in it.
Bucky scoffed then leaned in to kiss you, hard. It wasn’t a loving kiss in any way. It was possessive though. Like he was putting on a show for whoever was watching, making sure everyone in this dilapidated room understood that you were his now.
You kissed him back, angrily. You despised him. Your entire family did. But they couldn’t save you this time. Bucky’s attack was unexpected. Your guards were unprepared. You were the last line of defence and this… union was necessary. You had to offer something, anything. Otherwise Bucky and his guys threatened to burn down your half of the city and turned it to ash immediately.
But it wasn’t always like this. Your families used to be allies. You actually grew up with Bucky, he tolerated you enough back then and you had always had a crush on him.
Then that night happened almost a decade ago…
It was your twentieth birthday party, and your father made an announcement which you were not ready for.
He announced to the ballroom filled with important people that you were to marry Bucky, and that both families were beyond happy to transform their friendship into something more solid through this alliance.
You remained frozen in place for long minutes after that announcement was made, even though your heart raced like never before. No one had told you about this, but judging by the way your family hugged and congratulated Bucky’s family you understood that this was all planned.
You kept that smile on your face though, as people walked over to congratulate you. You looked around and tried to find Bucky in the crowd to see if he knew about this but he was nowhere to be found.
You were certain he was here just a moment ago, leaning against one of the pillars and brooding as always. And he’d just disappeared.
The announcement made your heart flutter incessantly. After all, you’d always had a huge crush on Bucky. How could you not? He was the boy you grew up around, he had pretty eyes and nice hair. Sure he was broody and rarely ever smiled but you liked how it suited his bad boy personality. And your young heart was weak for the handsome boy with tattoos and blue eyes.
After people were done congratulating you, you discretely walked out of the party and decided to look around and try to find Bucky. You hated how giddy you were. Sure, Bucky was broody and rarely ever laughed. He spent his entire time glaring at you then getting jealous when you talked to other guys. But you had liked him since forever.
You looked all over your father’s mansion. Bucky was nowhere to be found indoors. So… maybe the pool area outside? You started walking in that direction, feeling like a princess in your white ball gown as you walked down an empty hallway, a faint smile on your face as you looked for the man you were meant to marry soon.
Maybe Bucky knew about this announcement. Maybe he was okay with it. Maybe this would be your fairytale in real life, you thought. Maybe you’d melt his frozen heart and everything would be perfect. Maybe he liked you back all along and you just never knew!
“...marry her?”
Your smile vanished as you stopped right before you stepped outside onto the patio. Was that Bucky’s voice? Was he talking to someone? You quietly stepped closer, hiding behind the plants as you tried your hardest to listen to what he was saying.
You could see him, standing on the black tiles by the pool. He had his back to you, and he held a phone to his ear. His broad shoulders and lean waist accentuated by how well that black suit moulded to his muscular body. You watched as he ran his fingers through his short black hair in frustration.
Who was he talking to?
“No!” He barked at the phone. “Did you not listen to what I just said? I don’t want to do this!” He yelled, not bothering that anyone around might hear him. “I tried to talk them out of it! This is so fucking stupid!”
You blinked in surprise, unable to process what you were hearing.
“I don’t care what I have to do, but I will not marry her.” He said with enough venomous certitude that a silent tear fell down your face.
All your previous delusions turned to nothing but heavy disappointment. It made you feel stupid. This gown felt stupid. The diamonds around your neck, around your wrists and in your hair felt stupid. How stupid of you to think this was all going to end well? How stupid of you to think your childhood crush actually meant something? How stupid of you to think that there was a chance he liked you back? Of course he didn’t. He wouldn’t have ignored you for years if he did.
You couldn’t stop the sudden sob that escaped your mouth. Afraid that he might have heard, you took a few steps back and hid behind a nearby, tall potted shrub.
Things were quiet for a moment or two. You heard him whispering so quietly you couldn’t make out what he said. Your face burned in embarrassment at the thought of him finding you here. You already felt stupid and childish, you didn’t want to get caught eavesdropping in this situation.
But then he resumed talking on the phone. You couldn’t risk moving to look at him so you remained hiding, and listened. Your heart broke with each word that left his mouth.
“And she’s so blind she doesn’t even see it.” He hissed, louder this time. “I barely tolerate her. Her whiny, and bratty attitude. I mean she’s a grown woman and still acts like she’s daddy’s little princess.” He scoffed. “You should’ve seen her today, she looks like a kid’s toy with that ridiculous dress on.”
More tears streamed down your face as you heard nothing but distaste and irritation in his voice. This was the boy you had a hopeless crush on? This is what he thought of you?
You didn’t need to hear more. This was more than enough to completely break you so you turned around and quietly walked back down the same hallway. You wiped your tears, and put a fake smile on as you went back to your party. This time with a plan in your head.
You endured the party with a heavy heart. Faked some more smiles until it ended. You didn’t see Bucky again for the rest of the night, which was good. By the early hours of the morning, everyone had left. You wandered around that empty ballroom like a ghost that night. For hours. Thinking, plotting. It was clear Bucky didn’t want this. And now neither did you. But your families had announced it. So what exactly could you do?
By the time the sun rose, you had already written a note to your father and left it on his desk. By the time the sky brightened, your bags were packed and you were already driving out of the mansion grounds. And you knew that by the time your father would go into his office and find that note, you would already be on a plane, on your way out of here.
You didn’t give too many details in the note. You simply said that you were leaving, not knowing when or if you’d be back.
Truth was, you had no solid plans. All you knew was that you needed to get away from home.
You didn’t know that when you’d return home – almost a decade later, so much would have changed.
Your father was angry. Livid actually, that you’d been away for years without contact. You briefly explained why you needed to leave. And how you’d been able to make a name for yourself elsewhere. But after he was done berating you for what you did when you were twenty and stupid, he filled you in on all that you’d missed in the past decade almost.
Some important points were: your family and Bucky were no longer allies, but were now each others’ worst rivals but no one knew that. The city was now secretly divided – your family ruled and controlled one side, and Bucky ruled the other.
“It’s just him now?” You had asked, and your father nodded.
“A lot happened after you left, actually–”
A loud noise cut him off. Rounds of bullets shot at the windows of the house, from all sides it seemed. And it was pure chaos. You could hear your guards fighting back, but even by just hearing the commotion you could tell you were severely outnumbered.
But whoever it was, they weren’t shooting at anyone, just at windows – making enough noise to get your attention and to get you to come outside.
You marched out of the room despite your father ordering you not to. And you were halfway down the grand stairs when he walked in and spotted you immediately with a smug look on his face.
Bucky. Walked in like he owned the place. He stopped in the middle of the foyer, which was now ruined. Bits and pieces of concrete and glass all over the marble floor. Flower pots destroyed, the gilded mirror in pieces as well. He made a mess of the home you grew up in and you almost shot him right in the heart there and then.
Here was the man who once broke your heart after making you think for years that maybe you had a chance.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” You hissed. You could hear your father coming to a stop on the landing several steps behind you. He was unprepared. You were armed with only one handgun tucked into your pocket. Your guards were outnumbered. This was a shitshow.
The guards – his and yours – stopped firing and now just stood all over the place on high alert. And you knew, deep down in your gut you just knew something which you weren’t ready for was about to happen.
“I see you’re finally home, princess.” Bucky just gave you a cold smile and shoved his hands in his pockets. The action drew your attention to one specific thing. The metal arm. You frowned at it in confusion, but didn’t react.
But that word… ‘princess’ brought back memories which chased you out of this place. And it only fueled your anger.
“What the fuck do you want?”
He lifted his nose slightly in the air, like the arrogant prick he had always been. “I’m here to collect what I was promised.” His voice was strong and confident. “A bride. Now you have a choice, princess. Either we do this in peace and no one gets hurt, or…”
He didn’t even have to finish his sentence because on cue, one of his guards sneakily appeared on the landing behind you, holding a gun to your father’s head. You froze for a moment. The look on your father’s face made everything so serious all of a sudden. You had to be extra careful here.
“You wouldn’t.”
He scoffed, “Wouldn’t I?”
You argued, “It’s been almost a decade.”
“I don’t care. We were supposed to marry each other–,”
You cut him off, “Yes, and you didn’t want that, did you? I heard you on the phone that night.” You finally confessed. “By the pool. I remember every single word that came out of your fucking mouth. So don’t come here acting like you’re entitled to–,”
“You think you know everything, don’t you?” He smirked, shaking his head. “Is that why you ran away? And didn’t come home for a decade? Because you spied on me that night and didn’t like what you heard?”
That did it. One moment you were standing on the stairs, afraid that your father might get hurt and the next you had your gun out and shot right at his metal arm, knowing it wouldn’t hurt him but it would make him lower his guard for just a second.
And that one second was enough to jump him and punch him right in the jaw. Fuck, it hurt but it also felt so damn good. All those years you’d been away, you were also training in your free time. And you knew you were good at combat.
But so was he. A few punches in and he managed to throw you down on the floor and pin you to the ground with that same metal hand around your throat, keeping you in place. You didn’t know why his guards just stood and did nothing, as though they had been ordered not to shoot at anyone here.
But you weren’t under any such orders, so you managed to land another punch to his jaw before he yelled, “Enough!” Right in your face. “Stop this shit, or I swear to–,”
You cut him off by punching him again, trying to get free the moment you felt his metal hand get loose around your throat. He growled in annoyance and tightened his grip.
“You’re like a wild fucking animal. Stop!”
You gritted your teeth at the insult and scratched his face exactly like how a wild animal would. You tried everything, tried to punch him again, tried to scratch down his neck and arms which only tore his shirt instead of his skin. You went for yet another punch and only then did you feel another pair of arms – one of his guards – pulling your hands away from his face. You thrashed and tried your hardest to break free but you couldn’t and ended up biting your own lip rather badly in the process.
“I fucking hate you, Bucky Barnes!” You hissed, defeated, and now with a bleeding, throbbing cut on your lip which matched his.
Bucky kept his hand around your neck as he leaned in menacingly and whispered, “Hate me all you want, princess. But you will marry me. Right here. Right now.”
And that’s how you found yourself kissing your husband, in the foyer of your father’s ruined mansion. With your helpless father, and the many guards as witnesses.
You pulled away from the kiss, breathless and angrier than earlier. Jaws clenched, you were ready to tackle him to the ground again, maybe actually shoot him with your gun this time, but he spoke before you could say anything.
“Let’s go.” He spoke, and like the loyal followers that they were, all of his guards silently walked out of your house. And Bucky grabbed your hand firmly in his and began pulling you out of the house as well.
You resisted again. “Wait! You brute!” You pulled your hand away from his and ran back up the stairs to your father. “I ruined everything, I’m sorry.”
He just hugged you and told you to be careful and be smart. And that he forgives you. You promised you’d come to see him soon. And then you left, refusing to take Bucky’s hand again as you walked out of your father’s house.
You needed to think. You couldn’t fight him right now. Besides, it’s not like you married him legally. All Bucky wanted was to make a scene and you let him. For now. You’d need some time to come up with a plan and decide what needed to be done. But for now…
“If you’re thinking about running away and disappearing for a decade again, you better stop. You’re not getting away this time. You hear me?” Bucky spoke, sitting next to you in the backseat of his car as the driver drove to his side of the city, to his house surely. That authoritative tone of his made you want to scratch his face again.
“You seem to be under the impression that you’re in control here, Barnes. Just know, I could still shoot you right now if I wanted to.” You didn’t look at him, you looked out the window. At the city that had changed in your absence.
“Ouch.” He faked his surprise. Then proceeded to put his arm around your shoulders to pull you into his chest, leaning down he whispered into your ear, “That’s not a nice way of treating your new husband, now is it?”
You gave him a fake smile, ignoring the way your brain thought he smelled delicious, and reached into your pocket to pull out your handgun. Placing the cold barrel right under his chin you said, “Try me, husband.”
The driver cleared his throat in nervousness and you didn’t want to traumatise the man so you pulled your gun away but left it in Bucky’s line of sight. He pulled away then, pulling his hand away from your shoulders but placed his metal hand on your thigh. A possessive move.
Yet that didn’t bother as much. But the metal hand? Where did that come from? What happened while you were gone?
He answered your questions voluntarily. “Got caught in a crossfire. I got shot too many times, the arm was beyond saving. So I had the metal arm made. It’s a very intricate technology, but it works just fine.” He said, flexing the hand on your skin.
You didn’t miss the hidden sexual connotation in that last part of his sentence. And you certainly couldn’t ignore the way your body responded to the cold, metal touch. It looked… badass. Not that you would ever tell him.
You tried to look out the window again, but his touch on your thigh was more distracting than you wanted it to be. It was all you could focus on. Just to stop thinking about it you said, “I don’t have any of my things.”
“It’s all been taken care of. Don’t worry.” He answered, looking down at his phone. Acting like he didn’t know his hand on your thigh was messing you up.
Still you frowned at his answer, “What do you mean it’s been taken care of?” Then you paused and thought about it for a moment, “Did you–” You sighed, “You knew I was coming, didn’t you? Did you have people spying on me?”
He shrugged, “You thought I would let my betrothed be out there in the world without keeping an eye on her?” He scoffed, looking up from his phone for a brief moment, “Of course I did. I know everything about you. I even know all about that secret, women-only army you created.” He added, “I was half expecting them to pop out of nowhere earlier at your father’s house.”
You were in disbelief. This whole time you thought you’d hid well. But no.
“Where are they anyway? Your girls?” He asked, and for once it didn’t sound like a taunt. It sounded like he was genuinely curious.
“Probably out hunting and beheading men who think they can get away with forcing women into marrying them by threatening to kill their fathers.” You gave him another one of your fake smiles, “I’ve trained them well.”
Bucky smiled back. “Well good. When they get here to try and free you, we could unite our forces. We’ll be untouchable then, you and I. I have the money and you have an army.” He winked. “Ultimate power couple.”
“You won’t get away with this, Barnes.”
He looked out of the window and said, “I just came to collect what was promised to be mine that night.”
You argued, bitterly, “Oh we both know what happened that night.”
“I do.” He said, “But do you? Do you really?”
You remained quiet for a moment. This was the second time he questioned your knowledge of what truly happened that night. As if you hadn’t heard him loud and clear on that phone call.
“You–,”
He cut you off and looked out the window as he said, “We’re home.”
It had been a long day. And you were running out of energy so instead of arguing some more, you just followed him out of the car and remained stunned for a moment as you looked at his house. It wasn’t his family home. This one seemed new.
It was just as large as your father’s mansion, just a lot more contemporary compared to the more Georgian architecture-inspired one you grew up in.
Bucky’s house sat on a sprawling green and pristine property. It was a perfect blend of sleek architecture and a glass house, which allowed the right amount of privacy but also allowed glimpses of the warm, farmhouse inspired interior. Even from outside you could tell it was homey and bright inside.
Before you could get a word out, you felt his hands on you again. You tensed up and almost hit him again in defence but before you could, Bucky was carrying you bridal style – literally – and marching towards the large doors of his ridiculously pretty home.
“What the fuck are you doing?” You questioned, squirming just a little in the intimate embrace.
“Traditions,” He said, looking down at you, “Can’t have you trip at the doorstep and risk bringing bad luck into our marriage.”
You frowned at him, reluctantly wrapping your arms around his neck for support. “You say ‘our marriage’ like it’s gonna be a real thing. It won’t, Barnes. I’ll be out of here before you–,”
He used you to push open the door and the warm interior of the home shut you up. For some reason you never imagined someone like Bucky would live in a house that actually looked like a home. You pictured him living in some villain’s lair.
But this was… beautiful.
You squirmed into his arms until he finally set you down carefully. You stood there for a minute, in the foyer, just looking around. Then you couldn’t help but say, “It would be a real pain if someone just started shooting at the windows of your house like a madman, wouldn’t it?” You waved your gun in front of his face.
“I’ll send people over tomorrow morning to fix your father’s house.”
“You don’t even sound apologetic.” You scoffed.
“I’m not.”
You narrowed your eyes at him. “Was it necessary? To shoot at my house like that? You couldn’t just, I don’t know, ring the doorbell to get me to come outside? You absolutely had to be a child?”
He smirked then said, “First of all, that isn’t your house anymore. This is where you live now, and you will call this your home. Second of all, why blame me when you acted just as childish when you decided to run away all those years ago? Third of all, I did it because, well, I do like some drama.”
You couldn’t not believe him. “You amaze me with your stupidity, Barnes.”
“You amaze me with your bratty attitude, Mrs. Barnes.”
You stepped closer to him, slow and in a threatening manner. “Don’t call me that.”
“Don’t call me that.”
You sighed, “You know you’re still that little boy who used to bully everyone when we played as kids.”
He clarified, “No, I bullied you because you were annoying. Everyone else was fine.”
“I hate you.” You said with enough hostility you hoped it would shut him up.
It didn’t. “Well, see.” He took your hand in his and said slowly as if talking you down, “That’s something we’ll work on together as a couple.”
You pulled your hand away and were so tempted to just–
“Come,” he said, “I’ll show you where our room is.” You began protesting immediately but he cut you off by saying, “Stop being fucking difficult. We’re married now, act like it.”
“I want a separate room!”
“No.”
“I’m not sleeping with you!”
“Then don’t. But you will sleep in my bed. Like my wife should.”
“You’re a fucking animal!” You tried tugging your hand free from his grasp.
Bucky had had enough. So he pinned you to the nearest surface, which happened to be the closed door of his bedroom. He grabbed both your wrists in his metal hand and pinned them above your head. His face was just inches away from yours, and he stared deep into your eyes.
Your mind immediately went to that harsh kiss you’d shared earlier. And you hated how your body squirmed just as the thought of it. You refused to think about it any more, but his mouth was just so, so close. The cut on his lip, the slight stubble on his cheek and around his mouth, the texture of his skin, you were picking up on details you’d missed.
Bucky spoke in a calm, deep voice which sent shivers down your spine. “Let’s be adults here, okay? You stop acting like a brat, and I’ll stop treating you like one.” He said, pressing his chest into yours. “It’s been a long day, and I know you’re running out of energy as well so stop resisting me. If I was an animal, I would’ve dragged you to bed right now and would’ve made you mine in every sense of the word.” He whispered, his voice cold and dangerous. “But I’m not. So you will walk into this room, and head straight for a warm shower and after you’re done we’re gonna clean these wounds. Am I clear?”
You nodded quickly, like an idiot entranced by his gorgeous voice.
“Use your words, princess. Am I clear?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Let’s go.”
—
You leaned against the counter, wrapped in a fluffy robe and another towel wrapped around your wet hair, and Bucky was cleaning the cut on your lip.
His wounds were all cleaned. It looked like he had used a different shower while you were in here. His long hair was damp and tied into a small bun, with strands of his dark hair falling on either side of his face. He had changed into a tight black t-shirt and PJ trousers. It was frustrating to look at him. Because he looked so damn good.
Last time you’d seen him was when he was a twenty year old boy. He’d changed since. He seemed taller somehow. Or maybe it was just the muscles making him look bigger.
You couldn’t look away from the metal arm. And the intricate details on it.
“Are you hurt anywhere else?” He asked, throwing the used cotton balls and napkins in the trash can.
You didn’t miss the way he was being gentle all of a sudden. Calm voice, calm movement. Very different from the man who’d forced you to marry him just hours ago.
“No.” You answered, turning around to look in the mirror. The bruise on your neck was very much visible now. You didn’t notice Bucky approaching you again, you didn’t notice how close he got, not until he reached out and touched your neck with his warm fingers.
And for the first time, he sounded genuine when he said, “I’m sorry. About that.”
You met his eyes through the mirror and remained quiet for a moment. For a brief moment you thought back to that night. What if you hadn’t heard him on the phone? What if you had married him back then? Would this be a normal, daily thing? Sharing a bathroom, a bed?
“I punched you. Multiple times. This makes us equal.”
Bucky scoffed, then nodded. Then said, “Come to bed when you’re done.” And left you alone in the bathroom.
Shit. You stared at yourself in the mirror. What a day. All you wanted was to pay your father a visit and maybe spend some days at home and then fly back to where you came from. Having your father’s house be attacked, getting married, and having to share a bedroom with the man who once broke your heart… yeah, all that wasn’t in the plan.
You changed into some comfy PJs Bucky had brought you earlier and walked out into the bedroom. You found Bucky on his phone again, standing by the foot of the bed.
“Which side do you sleep on?” He asked, not looking up from his phone.
“Uh, right.” You answered, because for some reason now he felt the need to ask for your opinion.
Bucky didn’t say a word as he moved to the left side of the bed and peeled back the covers before getting in. Like this was just another day. Like this was normal. You awkwardly walked to your side of the bed and just stood there for a moment.
“Just get in bed. I won’t touch you.”
He didn’t even look at you as he spoke and, well, the lack of attention from him bothered you. Oh what the hell. You pulled the covers and got under them. You curled onto your side, with your back facing him.
Soon, you heard him click something and all the lights turned off. You sensed movement behind you but that was it. He didn’t touch you. In fact, there was so much distance between you two that your back felt cold. And now that annoyed you as well.
You couldn’t sleep.
An hour went by, you still couldn’t sleep.
Another hour went by, and now you’d begun tossing and turning so much that you heard Bucky groaning.
“Will you stop that?”
“I can’t sleep.” You mumbled.
“Don’t make it my problem. Stop moving.”
“Wow. Some husband you are.”
Silence. Then you felt your body sliding across the bed as Bucky wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you into his warm chest.
“What the–,”
“Shh.” He cut you off, his warm breath tickling your cheek as he spooned you from behind. “It’s cold. We could both use the warmth. Now go to sleep.”
You scoffed, but didn’t move. “Your fancy house doesn’t have a thermostat? Fix the temperature.”
“I like this better.”
“I better not find your hands wandering.”
You moved around for a bit, finding a comfortable spot. Then you moved some more and Bucky tightened his arm around you and whispered into your ear, “Stop wiggling against my cock. I understand it’s our wedding night and all but I’m too tired to do anything.”
Your face burned in embarrassment. You tried to put some distance between your bodies, even though you liked his body heat, but thankfully Bucky pulled you right back.
“Did I say you can move?” He chided.
“What now, I need your permission to get comfortable in bed?”
“Brat.”
“Asshole.”
—
You didn’t know when you fell asleep at night. But the heat from Bucky’s chest definitely helped. It must’ve been that. And in the middle of the night, you must’ve searched for more heat. That was probably the only reason why you woke up and found yourself sprawled all over him, face into the crook of his neck and both your hands under his shirt, legs tangled with his.
“You call me an animal. But look at you. Touching me while I was sleeping.” He mumbled. “Shameless.”
You pulled away so fast, but then regretted it. Because now you missed his warmth. You shivered even under the covers. “Would it kill you to keep your damn house a little warmer?”
He just yawned and got out of bed. “Get ready.” He said, “We might have a guest coming over. And you have to be a good little wife and play host.”
“Fuck you.”
“Oh you will.” He teased, “Soon.” Then he winked and walked out of the room.
Well, he at least was giving you some privacy and let you have this bathroom all to yourself. Screw his and his mind games. First he barges into your house, forces you to marry him, then cuddles you to sleep.
You caught yourself frowning multiple times while you showered, did some skin care, and found the closet on the other side of the room. You weren’t even surprised when you found a whole section filled with all you could need. All the shoes seemed like they would fit you, all the outfits as well.
Nothing fazed you anymore. Not even the fact that your new husband might be a bit of a stalker. How else would he know your underwear size!? And there were drawers full of them.
You tried not to worry too much as you got dressed. You were gonna get out of here soon anyway.
Once dressed and ready for the day, you got downstairs and immediately heard Bucky’s voice, along with another voice. They were laughing over something. You found out where they were and approached the high-ceilinged, charming, farmhouse-inspired kitchen which blended with a spacious, cosy dining area.
The other man had his back to you, but you knew that voice. Even though you hadn’t heard it in years.
“Sam?” You couldn’t help but call out, lingering by the large doorway. Bucky remained leaning against the kitchen counter with a coffee mug in his hand, while Sam got up from where he sat at the breakfast counter.
He turned around and his familiar, warm brown eyes met yours. He gave you a comforting smile. You, Sam, and Bucky all grew up together, along with some other kids from families similar to yours. And Sam had always been a sweetheart. You’d missed him.
So you didn’t even hesitate to walk right into his arms once he opened them, wanting a hug. You squeezed him tight and said, “I thought I’d never see you again, Sammy!”
Sam hugged you back just as tight, “I can’t believe I haven’t seen you in almost a decade.” He pulled away to look down at you before giving you a loud kiss on the cheek. Safe to say, he was just as handsome as he was when you left this place. “How have you been?”
You looked over Sam’s broad shoulder and found a broody Bucky. “I’ve been better.”
Sam got really serious, and was about to say something but Bucky’s voice rumbled from behind. “That’s enough hugging and smooching. Sam, stop touching my wife.”
“Ooh, your wife.” Sam teased, before letting go of you and letting you walk out of his arms. “First of all, why didn’t you tell me you two were planning to get married this whole time?” He asked Bucky in an accusatory tone. “My childhood friends got married and I wasn’t even invited.”
Sam sat back down at the breakfast counter, so he didn’t see the questioning stare you sent Bucky. So Sam wasn’t aware of the circumstances under which you got married? Of course he didn’t. Nobody knew, and Bucky wasn’t about to tell anyone
“It all happened so quickly, Sam.” You placed a gentle hand on his shoulder as you said, “Bucky was… impatient. Even my father didn’t have time to prepare much. It all just, you know, happened.” You spoke as you helped yourself to some breakfast, taking a seat at the table where you could see both men well.
You didn’t miss the way Bucky’s jaws kept clenching and unclenching as you tiptoed the line between telling the truth and lying to Sam.
“Yeah,” Sam agreed, “I know how impatient he can be.” He glared at Bucky, who shook his head in disbelief.
“I take it you two work together now?” You only asked because you remember how the parents would always talk about how wonderful it would be if these two boys worked together. Apparently they made a great team back then.
“We do.” Bucky answered, placing his mug down before turning around and began chopping some things.
“You see,” Sam began explaining in a playful tone. “After everything happened, Bucky was all along. Poor little princeling with no guidance and a kingdom to run.” You saw Bucky shaking his head at Sam’s words. Sam continued, “So I knew I had to step in and become his mentor. He wouldn’t have survived without me.”
You made a mental note to ask about what ‘everything’ he was referring to, but couldn’t help but smile at the camaraderie between them, despite it all. Sam had always been a good company. He was the sun rays filtering through dark clouds, and Bucky was the dark, gloomy day who needed the sun’s brightness.
“Wouldn’t have survived.” Bucky muttered, mocking his friend. “You helped me train sometimes. You introduced me to people. That’s about it.” He clarified, bringing over a bowl of chopped fruit over to you and pushed it towards you without a word said.
You liked fruits for breakfast. And you assumed he remembered. But he did it all too casually. As if he did it every day. You didn’t want to cause a scene so you accepted the bowl quietly.
“That’s about it?” Sam shook his head, then turned to you. “I took care of him like a parent–,”
“No you didn’t. You–”
“–and this is how he treats me. I should’ve let you bleed out from that bullet wound that one time. Maybe you wouldn’t be here disrespecting me then.”
You chuckled, clearly on Sam’s team. Bucky didn’t like that. “What about my wife then? Who would be taking care of her?”
“I would.” Sam answered without missing a beat. “We all know if not you then I was gonna marry her.” He turned to you, knowing damn well he was gonna get a reaction out of Bucky any time now. Sam lived to mess with Bucky after all. He always did, ever since you were all kids. “Wouldn’t you have married me if Bucky had died?” He asked you with that mischievous smile on his face.
“I–,”
“You answer that and you’ll never see Sam again.” Bucky said, narrowing his eyes at you, before you couldn’t get a word out of your mouth.
Sam smirked triumphantly.
You rolled your eyes at Bucky and looked right at Sam and said, “I would’ve married you in a heartbeat, Sammy.”
Sam went to grab your hand, surely to bring it up to his lips for a kiss, but Bucky threw a napkin right at him before he could.
“You touch my wife again and I swear–,”
“Must you always threaten people?” You asked, glaring at Bucky.
He glared back. And opened his mouth to say something but Sam cut him off. “Hey, hey, kids. No fighting.” He quickly changed the topic, “Now, since you have gotten married and no one was there, how about a party? To announce it to everyone? We could invite the whole city.”
Party. Yeah right. The last time you attended an extravagant party you had your heart broken. Not just broken, but stepped onto and crushed to a pulp.
You went to say no, “Maybe we shouldn’t–,”
But Bucky declared, “Absolutely we should. After all, we waited almost a decade to marry each other.” He looked right at you as he said that. “It’s time everyone knows you’re finally mine.”
“Perfect!” Sam began planning immediately. He had always been the life of all parties, and he loved them.
While you occasionally answered his questions, you didn’t stop glaring at your husband while you finished your breakfast. There was something he was hiding. You were certain of it. But what?
—
A couple days later, it was finally the night of the party.
The past few days had been more or less similar. You’d always wake up sprawled all over Bucky’s chest, and he always made a teasing comment about it. You’d have breakfast in silence, after which he’d disappear and then he’d come home in the evenings. You never talked while having dinner.
The one time you did talk, it didn’t end well.
You brought it up at dinner. “I tried to go out today. Your people followed me into the city.”
“Our people.” He corrected. Bucky didn’t find anything wrong with that apparently because he simply said, “And they’re your security detail. They’ve been ordered to follow you.”
“So I don’t escape?”
“So you’re always safe.”
“Oh come on. You can’t keep me here forever.”
He shrugged, “You’re not being kept. This is your home, we’re married. This is where you live now.”
You stood up from the table.You didn’t care that the housekeepers you’d been recently introduced to could hear. “And who are you to make that decision for me?” You asked, in a surprisingly calm tone.
He replied in a similar tone. “Your husband.”
You sighed, trying your hardest to keep it all contained. “I have a life, you know? A totally separate life I’ve been living since I left this place. I have to get back to it at some point. You proved your point. Now let me go.”
He ignored all of that. “I’m working on transferring all your businesses and staff here.” He announced. “I’m buying a brand new building in the city, you can have it and set it up however you want. The only thing I can’t find is your secret army of highly trained soldiers.”
“You’ll never find my girls.”
“Why’s that?”
“They’re trained to outrun men like you. All men, in fact.” You added, “I made sure of that. I made sure they’d never be used and moved around like pieces on a chessboard then discarded by people like you.”
“Sounds like you speak from experience.”
“Fuck you, Barnes.” You spat before walking away.
You made sure to sleep on the very edge of the gigantic bed that night, as far away from him as possible. But in the morning, you still woke up snuggled into his chest, on his side of the bed, like you’d been trying to burrow under his skin seeking warmth at night.
You didn’t speak after that. You made sure to ignore him. Each time you left the house, to go see your father or to just roam around the city you’d missed so much, you’d look in the rear view mirror and find big, bulky SUVs following you around.
And here you were now, after days of silent treatment, you stood in front of the large mirror in the closet of your bedroom and watched your reflection. Of course the bastard had chosen an extravagant evening gown for you to wear which looked eerily similar to the one you wore that night for your birthday almost ten years ago.
Except this one was much more elegant. And looked a lot like a wedding dress. With its simple square neckline, thin straps, fitted bodice and a majestic skirt. All white and sparkly. The last time you felt like a princess, the night ended terribly. So this time you were afraid to even let yourself appreciate the beautiful woman in the mirror who stared back at you.
You kept fidgeting, with the skirt of the dress, watching it swish around. You didn’t notice Bucky approaching you from behind. Not until he stood right behind you, his chest brushing against your slight exposed back.
He looked… unreal in his all black suit. Shiny black tie and a small shiny pin. His hair was perfect as always, and his all black outfit really made his eyes seem bluer than ever. Or maybe it was the lights in this closet that did it. But it made you notice the lines by his eyes, which gave away just how much time had gone by.
He was still that bad boy with tattoos whom you had a crush on, who made your race whenever he looked at you. Except now he was older, meaner. And your husband. Whom you hated.
Did you?
You tensed up when he placed a hand on your waist, right where the bodice and skirt were sewn together. You met his eyes through the mirror, but said nothing. You had no mean words to throw at him this time and neither did he.
“You look beautiful.” He said, leaning in just a little to rest his cheek against your temple.
You froze at the soft touch which drove you insane. You must be ovulating, you thought, because there was no way that mere touch was making your heart race like this for no other reason. You began breathing faster, that’s how fast your heart was racing.
You almost leaned into his touch, ready to forget it all just for one moment of warmth. Of peace and quiet. Just one moment to appreciate that you looked beautiful and you had your husband’s attention and all was well. To appreciate that you two look great together. To stop fighting this weird alchemy between you two which kept drawing you to one another no matter what. But then you remembered.
“Do I?” You asked, keeping your voice steady. “You sure I don’t look like a kid’s toy with this ridiculous dress on?”
He remembered too, judging by the look on his face. He looked surprised, then briefly apologetic before settling on a familiar, broody frown. “What did I say about being a brat?”
“I’ll stop being a brat when you stop being an asshole.” You scoffed. “You always were so… careless. With people. With everything. Always thinking you were above everyone else, ever since we were just kids.” You added, “I hate you.”
He smirked, then grabbed your elbow and turned you around so he could look at you, or glare at you with his ocean blue eyes. “You didn’t hate me back then, did you?” He pushed you against the closest surface, which happened to be a wooden dresser. “You craved my attention back then. You used to find excuses to hold my hand when we were little. When we got older you used to hate it when I looked at other girls at school. Now look at you. You’re in my house, you sleep in my bed.” He leaned in, whispering in your ear, “You’re my wife. Then why do you keep resisting me, hmm?”
“I was stupid back then. Wasted so much time trying to get your attention, and all I ever was to you was a whiny, bratty–,” You cut yourself off with a surprised gasp as you watched Bucky lower to his knees in front of you, his hands lifting the skirt of your dress. He was rough with it, crumpling it in his strong fists. “What are you doing?” You asked, shocked and surprised but not making a move to get away. “You– you’re ruining my dress.”
He looked up at you, bunching some of the fabric near your waist and holding the front part of your dress up, pinning the bunched up skirt at your abdomen. As if he wanted to–
Your entire face burned when you realised just how close and intimate this was.
“I bought this dress. I’ll ruin it if I want to.” He spoke in that arrogant tone you weren’t sure you entirely hated at this moment. “You’re lucky I’m not tearing it off of you.”
“And you’re lucky I’m not–,”
He cut you off by leaning in and kissing your inner thigh. Just like that. As if you weren’t on the verge of arguing just now. You were still processing that soft kiss he left on your thigh, and he was already moving to spread your legs apart as he slowly looked up, waiting to see if you’d tell him to stop or push him away.
You didn’t.
His eyes remained focused on your face as his hand reached out and he ran his metal knuckles between your legs, along your wet folds through your thin underwear, making you shudder at his mere touch. You flinched at the cold, but didn’t pull away.
“You’re dripping.” He commented, slowly sliding down your underwear. “Does arguing with me turn you on, baby? Is that why you do it all the time?” He smirked, finally throwing your underwear to the side.
You glared at him, opening your mouth to argue yet again but you ended up just letting out a soft moan as you felt his metal fingertips gently trail up and down your legs. He chuckled at how sensitive and responsive you were. Bucky placed a kiss on your inner thigh again and you gasped.
“Looks like you haven’t been taken care of in a while.” He said, moving his fingers over your clit, circling it slowly. “Have you?” He sounded like he was accusing you.
“No.” You hissed, angry at how much you didn’t mind his touch. “You barged in and married me before I could go out and find someone who might–,”
“I tolerate you talking to and about Sam because he’s our friend.” He cut you off. “But if I hear you talking about any other man, I promise I will be committing unnecessary crimes and it’ll all be on you.” He paused, glaring at you. “You hear me?”
You nodded. Fuck he looked good from up here.
He held your stare as he leaned in and placed his mouth to your core, giving your clit a firm such before his warm tongue slipped past your folds and teased your dripping hole. One hand holding part of your dress up while the metal one worked in tandem with his tongue, circling your throbbing clit and parting your wet folds with ease.
“Should’ve known you’d taste like fucking heaven,” He whispered, almost to himself.
You couldn’t hold the moans and whimpers in, feeling his stubble rubbing against your soft skin, craving more of it. You couldn’t help but slide hesitant fingers into his hair, pulling him closer. “Please, more…” You whined.
That made him wild. And he ate you out relentlessly, taking his time and learning what worked for you and what didn’t, until your legs were shaking and your moans were louder.
He slid his fingers, just a knuckle deep inside you and watched how much you loved that. “That feels good, doesn’t it, baby?”
You only whimpered in response.
When he was certain you were right on the edge, hips moving in a frantic way which made you grind against his fingers and tongue, only then did he pull away and let go of your dress before standing back up to face you with a condescending smirk.
“You think it’s that easy?” He spoke, but you focused more on the wetness coating his lips rather than his words.
You blinked a couple of times to break out of whatever spell he’d just put you under using that damned mouth and fingers of his. He’d… he’d dared bring you right to the edge. But hadn’t let you come.
You were breathing heavily, feeling hot and tingly all over.
He chuckled, enjoying the speechlessness which was rare when it came to you. “If you want more, then behave tonight. Be good and tell everyone how in love we are and all the nice things, and I promise I’ll take care of you later tonight. Okay?“
You knew what he was doing. He wanted you to tell as many people as possible because the more people knew, the harder it would be for you to sneak out of this place again.
He didn’t even wait for a response. He just licked his lips clean, shamelessly holding your stare while he did. Then turned to the mirror and fixed his suit before bending down to pick up your discarded underwear. You looked away, embarrassed but waiting for him to hand it to you.
Except he didn’t. He pocketed it like it was nothing and said, “Come on, our guests are waiting.” Then he walked out of the room like nothing happened. Like he hadn’t made you almost lose your mind just minutes ago. Like he didn’t have his tongue and fingers inside you. Like he hadn’t gotten so close to making you come.
Like your heart wasn’t still racing even after he’d left the room.
Eventually, you calmed down. Fixed your makeup, hair and dress again before heading towards the temporary, clear outdoor party tent Sam had people install in Bucky’s huge backyard. The closer you got, the more it looked straight out of a fairytale. Given the clear walls, you could see the golden lights and decor inside.
The chandeliers, the floral arrangements, the tables and the dance floor where people danced with their partners.
Speaking of partners, there by the entrance stood a tall, dark figure. Your husband.
“Took you a while.” He muttered once you got close enough to him.
You stopped by his side and sighed. Then answered in a monotone voice, trying to hide how bothered you were. “Well, some conceited asshole left me to deal with a mess he made so there’s that.”
Bucky snickered. “Don’t act so indifferent. You were dripping all over my tongue and hand just minutes ago.”
“Keep your voice down.” You hissed.
“Nothing to be ashamed of. It’s not taboo for a husband to take care of his wife, you know?” He sounded just as annoying as you expected he would.
You looked down and noticed he had his elbow extended out for you to take. You took it and spoke once you two began walking into the venue. “If you think you are getting anywhere near me to take care of me again, husband, you are dead fucking wrong.” You put a fake smile on as people began noticing your arrival and flocked to you.
Bucky whispered one last thing into your ear before he left you in the care of the excited, curious, and loud group of ladies coming your way, “Oh you’ll beg me to touch you soon enough, wife.”
Then he was gone again. Leaving you right on that edge again.
Damn him!
—
You had to give it to Sam, he knew how to organise a party. The decor, the food, the music, the performances, all of it was perfect.
He even re-introduced to all the people you might have forgotten while you were gone. And naturally everyone had questions. You repeated the same answers to them all. The same lies.
Where were you this whole time? You wanted to do your own thing, and make your own name so you decided to get away from home.
Why did you leave right after it was announced that you were to marry Bucky Barnes? Oh your father never said when you were to marry him. He just said you would. Besides, both you and Bucky were too young to marry back then.
Did Bucky know you were going to be gone? Of course he did! You two were childhood sweethearts after all. Yes, you did keep in touch this whole time and only fell more and more in love. Yes, distance does make the heart grow fonder and all.
Why did the wedding happen so suddenly and in secret? After almost a decade of being far apart from each other, you two could no longer wait anymore. So you eloped the day you came back.
There are rumours that your father and Bucky have some kind of tension going on between them, is any of it true? That was the one question you didn’t feel too confident about. Because your father never ended up telling you why that was. How did the rivalry start? You lied and said, it’s just because you eloped. Your father wanted to be involved but you were too in love to think straight. So now your father was giving your poor husband a hard time for stealing his little girl.
As you paraded around and met everyone, you could feel Bucky’s eyes on you at all times. You didn’t have to look to know. You could feel the burning sensation along your back and you just knew he was watching you.
And he watched all night. Up until the moment people began leaving and you had no choice but to find him again, not knowing what else to do.
“You lie very well.” He commented, holding his elbow out for you to take again.
You did. And also leaned into him a little because you had been standing for too many hours. You decided to ignore the hostility for just a minute. “Yes, I’m a natural.”
“Everyone bought your bullshit about how we are childhood sweethearts turned lovers.” He whispered, turning his head to face you.
“Well, you did say to make it believable.”
“Oh it is.” He boasted, “Especially since you’ve been looking at me like that the whole night.”
You rolled your eyes, “How?”
“With longing, and desire. You’re all hot and bothered. You crave my tongue back on that throbbing little clit, don’t you?”
“You’re delusional, Barnes.”
“And you’re dripping wet for me, Mrs. Barnes.”
—
The party ended, and after Sam left you and Bucky made your way back inside the house. Sam, being the angel that he was, had made sure a clean up crew would be here early the next morning so you had nothing to worry about.
Not that it should bother you whether or not Bucky’s house is tidy.
You had a faint smile on your face as you went about your nighttime routine. Shower, skin care, a quick snack in the kitchen. And while you were downstairs, searching the pantry for something sweet, you saw Bucky near the thermostat.
The pantry hid you well, so Bucky didn’t see you. But you watched him mess with the temperature. You squinted and realised he was lowering it. The damned bastard was making it colder! No wonder you were freezing each night and woke up each morning snuggled up to him, basking in his warmth.
This asshole.
You remained in hiding until Bucky left, and this time as you made your way upstairs you vowed you wouldn’t reach for his warmth. No matter how cold it got. And he wouldn’t get to use you as a personal heated blanket either. Let him freeze.
You barely lasted thirty minutes under the covers.
And he was quiet and didn’t move so you thought he was asleep already as you carefully scooted a little bit closer, trying to feel where he was in the dark. If only this bed wasn’t so damn big. You patted around, trying not to move to much as you–
“I can hear you, you know? If you want to cuddle, just say it.”
You stopped moving immediately. “Shut up.” You muttered, frowning at him even though he couldn’t see it. You could see his faint silhouette in the dark, so you knew when he turned on his side to face you.
“What is it, wife? You need some warmth on this cold, cold night?” He asked in that mocking tone of his.
“No.” You answered, lying. Because yes you did.
He muttered ‘stubborn brat’ under his breath and then grabbed you and pulled you close until your back was completely pressed against his chest. His warm, comfy chest. You bit back a sigh of relief once you felt his body heating wrapping you in a cocoon.
“I saw you messing with the thermostat.” You admitted.
“Oh?”
“Yes. You make it cold on purpose.”
“Oh no.” He mocked. “ Why didn’t you fix it then?” He asked, and it hit you how childish this was. He leaned in just enough so that his lips brushed against your cheek when he spoke. “Could it be that you like cuddling with me?”
“Shut up.”
He scoffed, finally wrapping his arms around you, but you hissed upon feeling his metal arm on your body.
“It’s cold.”
“Warm it up for me then.”
“What–”
You stopped talking the moment Bucky grabbed one of your legs and hooked it on top of his, spreading your legs to make room for his hand as you both remained on your sides, with him spooning you from behind.
His metal hand found itself sliding into your shorts, past your underwear and he cupped you with such confidence and authority that you couldn’t help leaning into and grinding into his touch. His other hand slid under your pillow and down so he could grab and give your breast a firm squeeze.
Fuck. His hands felt like they were touching you everywhere.
“I told you I’d take care of you if you behaved.” He whispered into your ear. “Time for a little reward, wife.”
He slid two fingers inside you, you gasped at the feeling of him being knuckles deep inside you. You whined as he stretched you a little, moving his fingers around until your hips were moving on their own, trying to get him to move some more.
He chuckled. “That feels good?” He murmured into your ear.
His voice, his warmth, the softness of his embrace, the unhurried way his fingers were moving in and out of you, sliding over your clit and stroking your walls like he had all the time in the world.
Your hands wrapped around his metal wrist, keeping his hand in place as you rode his fingers the way you wanted. Hips moving forward and causing his fingers to slide in and out, while you moaned and whimpered.
His lips brushed against your cheek over and over again as he whispered against your skin, “See how nice it is when you behave? Hmm? You can have me whenever you want, baby. Just be good for me, and I’ll do anything for you.”
The animosity between you was forgotten at this moment. Here, in this dark room the past didn’t matter for a few minutes. Nothing mattered, just that you wanted something and he was giving it to you.
His thumb caressed your clit, teasing it a little more until you cried out, “Bucky, please…”
He froze. You did too. Then he chuckled and said, “So all is takes is a little finger fucking and now you have manners and you call me by my name?” He sounded just as annoyingly playful as you knew he would.
“Oh fuck you!” You spat, then immediately let out a loud moan as he sped up and really fucked you with his fingers until you were a whimpering mess. “Please, please, please…”
“What did I say, huh?” He hissed. “Keep acting like a fucking brat and you’ll be treated like one.” He kept his fingers moving in and out of you. “I planned on really taking care of you tonight, but you know what? This is all you’re gonna get.”
Your moans and whimpers got louder and louder until you began clenching around his fingers, coming undone with a loud cry of his name. Body shaking and your hips grinding down on his hand as you savoured the last moments of your orgasm before he pulled out and pulled away from you.
You thought he’d go right back to sleep but then you felt him get out of bed. “Where are you–,”
“I’ll fix the temperature.” He mumbled, sounding annoyed. Rightfully so. “Go to sleep.”
And that was the last you heard or saw of him until the morning because you passed out right after. You didn’t even know if he returned to bed or not. Not that you cared much.
Right?
—
Things changed after that night.
A lot changed actually. Bucky had, miraculously, managed to uproot ten years of your life from elsewhere and planted it right here in the city. He took you to the building he’d been getting ready for you and it sure was something. You didn’t know what you expected but a brand new skyscraper was not what you had in mind.
The day he handed over papers and keys and gave you a tour of the huge building was the first time you felt a shift in this… bond you shared with him.
“Thank you.” You simply said as you both stepped into the shiny elevator so he could take you all the up to the top floor, to show you to your new office.
Bucky slid his hands in his pockets and turned to face you. “You think being nice equals sexual favours from me, wife?”
You could’ve told him to shut it. Or told him to go get fucked. But he was trying to be good to you, wasn’t he? Even after all he did, he wanted you next to him for some unknown reason and frankly you were tired of resisting. Your entire life was here now anyway. It wouldn’t hurt to… try. Would it?
So instead you answered with, “Doesn’t it?”
Bucky narrowed his eyes at you, searching for the catch. He didn’t find any so he said, “We’ll see about that.”
And that night he followed you into the shower and kissed you hard under the falling water. “I see you behaved yourself today.” He whispered against your mouth.
You pulled him closer by grabbing his neck and said, “Do I get a reward then?”
He didn’t say anything, just kissed you hard again and walked the two of you backwards until your back collided with the cold clear glass of the shower cubicle. Then he pulled away, looked down into your eyes. His own filled with lust and hunger as he asked, “You’re gonna let me fuck you?”
You nodded quickly before saying, “Yes. Please.”
He didn’t waste a single moment. He grabbed one of your legs and hooked it to his hip, spreading you open. He kissed you senseless again while he pushed inside of you. You moaned into the kiss as he filled you up, his cock stretching you out, making you whine and whimper as he slow fucked you.
“Fuck…” He breathily moaned against your open mouth while he moved against you. Pushing deeper, in and out of you until your moans and whimpers got louder and louder. The sound of the water falling from the shower drowned out most of it, so he fucked you until you moaned loud enough that he could hear you over the falling water.
“Please,” You cried out. Weeks of frustration wanting to be let out. “Please, Buck…” Your hands wrapped around his shoulders, and you held on while he fucked you.
Bucky almost froze again at the sound of his nickname falling from your lips. But he maintained his composure and sped up into you, feeling your walls clenching around him, gripping his cock.
“You’ve been good today,” He said, noticing the way you clenched around him hard at the sound of praise. “You didn’t talk back, not once. Is it because you wanted this cock, baby?”
You whined in response. Feeling his damp skin rubbing against yours, and for a brief moment you wanted to live in this moment forever.
“Oh, poor baby.” He gave you a messy, heated kiss then said, “It’s all yours, you know? You just have to ask nicely. And you can have it whenever you want.”
“Please…” You begged again, your pride nowhere in sight. “Please, Bucky.”
“Come for me, baby…” He breathed against your skin. His hands held you in place as he pounded into you. “Come for me.”
You did, moaning so loud it was all he heard as he came right after you.
—
It became a daily thing over the next few weeks. You’d seek Bucky out at random times during the day or more often right when he’d get into bed at night.
“Were you good today, wife?” He asked, his hands already moving all over you trying to undress you as fast as he could.
“Yes,” You breathed into his ear, your hands touching him all over his tattooed chest. “I even made you breakfast, remember?”
“Those burnt pancakes count?”
You shut him up by kissing him, pulling him down onto the bed and straddling him, then proceeded to ride him until you were both moaning and spent, too tired to move.
—
Things got… playful.
Oftentimes you’d catch yourself wondering why you weren’t actively working to get out of here. But your whole life was here now. Work, your family, and your husband. You didn’t hate Bucky as much as you thought you would. Just a few months ago you wanted to kill him on sight but now…
“I saw the new building you work at. He bought you that?” Your father asked one morning when you went over to join him for breakfast.
You cleared your throat and answered, “He did. He moved everything here. My businesses, my staff, all of it.”
“And the girls?” He asked, referring to the infamous, feared, and fierce army you had raised and trained over the last ten years.
“My girls are free to go wherever they want to.” You let pride fill you as you thought of them. “Besides, they don’t have to be here for me to know I can always count on them. They’re just a phone call away.” You explained. “Plus they have work to do. People to save, women to recruit. You know, the usual.”
“I’m proud of you, you know?”
You smiled at your father. Then a few moments passed and you couldn’t help but ask, “What happened after I left? Where is the rest of Bucky’s family?”
Your father looked surprised. “He didn’t tell you?”
“Tell me what?”
Your father shook his head. “It doesn’t matter now. They’re all gone anyway. Plus the boy, he… he treats you right, doesn’t he?”
You nodded. Then left it at that. You wanted a peaceful morning with your father, you didn’t want to ruin it by insisting he tell you about whatever it was that he wanted to keep in the past.
—
But it bothered you, knowing that something happened while you were gone that you knew nothing about and everyone refused to tell you about it.
All except one man. Your beloved friend, Sam.
He showed up one morning, demanding to see Bucky.
“He said he has an important phone call to attend to. With someone named Steve. He’s been outside for over an hour now,” You explained to Sam, who stood at the foyer looking disappointed, “It looks like he’ll be out for quite some time.”
Sam frowned, and sighed. “He said to come over for a round of golf.” He sounded like he’d been betrayed. “Ever since he started doing business and being friendly with that Steve guy,” Sam complained, “That bitch has been trying to steal my best friend.”
You chuckled and grabbed his hand to lead him further into the house. “I’m sorry my husband ruined your playdate, Sammy. But you can hang out with me.”
Sam reluctantly agreed only after you promised to make him blueberry muffins. He liked those ever since you were kids.
He agreed to help, and you both had a nice, comfortable conversation going while you worked. You caught yourself shaking your head a few times thinking about how just a few months ago if someone had told you you’d be in Bucky’s kitchen making muffins you wouldn’t believe it.
But here you were now.
Then Sam casually said, “I’m glad you two worked it out, you know? You’re so perfect for each other. Even back when we were kids, remember how everyone used to tease you two and say you would surely marry one another?” He laughed. “I mean after he told me all about how you heard him on the phone with me by the pool, I was worried you might never clear up the misunderstanding.” He chuckled, keeping his eyes down as he lined the muffin tin so didn’t see the way you froze. Sam continued, “I thought that’s why you left when I heard about your sudden disappearance. But–”
You cut him off, heart racing as memories of that night came flooding back in. “Sam… what do you mean on the phone with you?”
Sam looked up, frowning. “That night of your twentieth birthday. Remember how you found Bucky by the pool? He was on the phone with me that night. He was so angry when he told me what his family was planning to do to yours, how they were going to–,” Sam cut himself off as the realisation set in. “Did he not tell you the truth?”
Your heart pounded. Something was wrong.
“Tell me what truth?”
Sam’s eyes softened. “Oh, I shouldn’t be the one to–,”
“Sammy, please.” You begged in a whisper. “Even my father refuses to tell me anything. I have the right to know. What happened?”
Sam tried his hardest to make sense as he told you everything in a rush. “Look, something went wrong back then. Bucky’s family began siding with the rivals and they were trying to take your father down. They tricked your dad into thinking that getting you and Bucky married would be a good idea and well, your father chose to believe his friends so he made that announcement at the party.” Sam sighed, “But Bucky’s family were planning something really bad. They were going to use the wedding as an excuse to gather all your family in one place and… end all of you. Just so they’d be able to expand their territory. Bucky found out about this plan and he was pissed. So that night, he called me. To vent.”
You felt your eyes begin to water.
Sam continued. “But then you found him. I remember him whispering to me that you were doing a terrible job at hiding behind a plant or some shit. Then your huge gown gave away your hiding spot. But given you were listening, Bucky decided he’d get you annoyed enough to have you at least try to call off the wedding which would buy us some time to figure out what to do. That’s when he began saying those things about you. Trying his hardest to sound like he truly did not want to marry you.” Sam sighed, “I mean there might have been a better way of doing it rather than fake dialogues on a phone call, but we were twenty year old boys. We didn’t know better. We didn’t know you’d write that note and just disappear.”
What the actual fuck.
“Sam…” You whispered in disbelief.
He shook his head. “Please tell me you didn’t truly believe all that. He lied when he said those things that night, you know? Bucky liked you ever since we were kids. You don't remember how he used to get mad at me whenever I was around you for too long? How he always ignored your hiding spots when we played just so you’d win at hide-and-seek? You don’t remember how he used to bully your stupid boyfriends as we got a older?”
You couldn’t believe any of this. But Sam would never lie to you.
“Wait,” Sam put the pieces together. “So you didn’t know about any of this?”
You closed your eyes and sighed, “I didn’t. I heard all the things he said that night and… I had spent my entire life loving him and I thought…” You sighed. “I was young and stupid and heartbroken so I just left.” Then you explained. “I got back recently, Bucky made this whole show of raining down bullets at my father’s house and, well, we kinda got married that same day, in my father’s destroyed foyer.”
“You didn’t talk to each other this whole time?” Sam was in disbelief. “Oh for fuck’s sake. And I thought Bucky just never mentioned you while you’ve been gone because… well, he’s not exactly good at the whole heart to heart thing. He’s Bucky.”
Your surprise morphed into anger really quickly. “I need to find my husband.” You said, quickly walking out of the kitchen.
Sam yelled behind you, “I'm gonna take this muffin batter and go before he shoots me after he finds out I told you all this!”
You just yelled back, “Bye Sammy, I love you”
Sam’s voice sounded distant as he yelled back, “Don’t let him hear you!”
You ran out to the back, where Bucky said he would be. And you found him by the pool. Again. The sight of him standing there gave you déjà-vu. Except he wasn’t your twenty-year old crush, in a black suit, arguing with who turned out to be Sam, on the night of your birthday anymore.
He was older now, your husband, wearing dark trousers and a loose white-button up shirt, standing by the pool with the sun setting behind him. You stood on the patio, for a second more, admiring him. The metal hand casually shoved in his pocket and his heavily tattooed arm held a phone to his ear.
You called out, no longer containing your anger. “You absolute piece of shit!”
Bucky looked towards you and just frowned, before rolling his eyes. Then said on the phone, “Hang on a minute, Steve. My wife’s angry at me again.” He lowered the phone to his chest and whispered to you, “What is it this time?”
“How long were you going to keep the truth from me?” You accused him. “Why didn’t you just tell me?”
He raised the phone to his ear again and said, “I’ll call you later Steve, something came up.” Then he hung up, tossed his phone onto one of the lounge chairs before turning to face you again. “Don’t get mad–”
“Stop telling me what to do!”
He sighed. “Did Sam tell you anything? I saw his car coming in earlier.”
You hissed, “Oh leave him alone! He’s a good man who doesn’t lie to me!”
Bucky shook his head, understanding that you knew all about what he’d been hiding, and too calmly said, “They were gonna kill you. All of you. Not just your family members, but the guards, the family friends, the members of your family who aren’t even in this life – all of you. I had to do something. My folks were wrong, I couldn’t let innocent people die just because my family got too power hungry.”
You took a step forward, “Why didn’t you tell me before I left? I would’ve talked to someone.”
“We barely even talked to each other as we got older. I thought you wouldn’t believe me.”
“But you could’ve at least tried to say something!”
He was quiet for a moment. Then said, “I came to see you the next day.” He confessed. “The morning after the party. But your father had found your note and you’d already left. You never mentioned exactly why you left in the note, so I let him think it was because of me.” He explained, “Since there would be no wedding I didn’t have to worry anymore. But the threat remained. So I goaded your father into a fight. He took the bait and tried to shoot at me. He missed, of course. But enough people heard about it so he ended up declaring war against my family.”
He paused. You listened quietly.
“No one knew it was all because of me. But at least from then on, your father was more cautious. And he began hating my folks. And they couldn’t keep pretending to be his friend for much longer either. All the truth began spilling out. Soon the city was divided and the attacks began. Allies became enemies, just like that.”
You were quiet. Processing everything. All of that shit happened and you were not aware.
For some reason, you asked, “During those attacks… Is that when you lost your arm?”
You only realised you’d been stepping closer and closer to him when he raised said metal arm and touched your cheek gently. He smiled and said, “No, baby. That was a different time.”
You had a tear sliding down your face. He wiped it away. “What happened then?” You asked.
“My folks didn’t stand a chance. Your father was not only angry and betrayed, but he was also sad that he lost you because of them, or me.” Bucky explained. “It got… really bad. Your father lost a lot of his guys. Then he got angrier. So he stopped responding to the petty attacks and came after my folks directly.”
“He killed them?” They were his friends once.
Bucky said, “He still doesn’t know I helped him all the way until the end.”
“But he spared you.”
Bucky smirked. “He just could never catch me.”
“But your family…” Bucky went against his own you realised.
“They were bad people. Not just because of what they planned to do to you but…” He sighed. “They were doing bad things in the background. Dealing in substances, and people.” He spared you the gory details.
But you understood.
“Why didn’t you tell me all this that day we got married?”
“You wouldn’t have believed me. You had just spent ten years hating me.” He shrugged. “But hey, it kept you safe.”
You stepped closer to him, feeling tired with all that you felt inside you. “So you never meant the things you said that night?”
Bucky pulled you close, cupping your face in his hands. “I have loved you my entire life. I never stopped.”
You sniffled, looking up into his pretty eyes. “We lost so much time. I spent years hating you for nothing.” It hurt thinking about it.
He smiled at you, “I should’ve thought it through better. But I was young and rash, and my family threatened to kill the girl I loved. I thought I was doing the right thing by pushing you away.” He sighed. “I just didn’t think I was going to lose you for almost a decade. I was always aware of where you were and what you did in life in those years. I was so proud of everything you did, the name you made for yourself. But I couldn’t reach you. You were angry and you hated me. So I waited. And then you came back and… I needed you with me. I’m sorry, I couldn’t wait any longer.”
You wrapped your arms around him, shoving your face into the crook of his neck as you let the tears fall quietly.
“Shh,” He whispered, running a comforting hand down your back. “It’s okay now, I’m here. We’re okay.”
“I’ve been mean to you.” You whispered. “I’m sorry.”
He chuckled quietly, “And I shot at your father’s house. We’re equal.”
“I… I love you too, you know?” You sniffled.
Bucky pulled away so he could look down at your teary face. “Sorry to say this, wife, but this isn’t half as romantic as the first time you told me you loved me.”
You frowned. “What?” Did you talk in your sleep? Oh no. Did you? “When did I say it?”
“We were seven, playing in the hedge maze in your father’s backyard.” He smiled, thinking about that day. “He had just had a new water fountain placed in there, and you wanted to show it to me. You must have thought it was pretty and that I needed to see it too. Then you dragged me all the way there and told me you loved me.” He smirked, “Seven-year old you would be disappointed in you right now.”
A chuckle escaped your lips at the faded memory. “I wish we could go back in time.”
“Well, we can’t. But we can have the rest of our lives together.”
You sniffled again, wiped your tears. Then nodded, and leaned in for a kiss. Deepening it the moment he kissed you back. Your fingers found their way into his longish hair and you gently tugged at his roots.
He smiled into the kiss when you whispered against his lips, “I like you with long hair.”
“I see you’re being nice again,” He murmured in between kisses, “Does my wife need something?”
You giggled this time. “I want you, Buck. Just you.”
“You have me.” He said. “Always.”
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Basic Training XVIII
Peter Parker x Reader
Warnings: NON-CON, DUB-CON, mentions of MURDER/violence/kidnapping, captivity, public sex, degradation, forced pregnancy, forced marriage, stockholm syndrome, ptsd, housewife kink, cop!Peter
➥ banner by @vase-of-lilies | divider by @whimsicalrogers
➥ series masterlist
summary: A pit stop during a road trip ends tragically when a small town cop sets his sights on you. You’re the newest addition in a long standing fucked up family tradition.
~
What had once been a great fear of yours had turned into something akin to a comfort.
The basement was a lot of things—dark, isolating, and creepy to name a few—but in the weeks that you’d been exiled to it’s suffocating walls, you slowly found solace in being left with nothing but your solitude and your thoughts. At least it felt that way. In truth, you didn’t feel much of anything at all and had grown content in that feeling.
Or lack thereof.
The days blended together until it was one long endless stretch of darkness, and it gave you so much time to think. You thought about every decision that had landed you here, all the way from your first conscious memory to that fateful day when you and your friends stopped in some seemingly unassuming town for food. If you thought about it too hard, you could feel a chill creeping over your still form.
Lingering on the day your friends were murdered threatened to put you back in that headspace you’d been in when you were first brought to this house. Your breathing would become shallow at the memory of your erratic emotions and your inability to hold your bodily fluids and the time you’d nearly lost your mind at the mere sight of blood.
You had quite literally lost your mind.
You’d been driven insane by the abuse you’d suffered and had been forced to witness, mind shattering and falling apart from the actions of the same person tasked with putting it back together in whatever manner benefited him. Peter had torn you down and built you back up like some demented caregiver and despite the fact that you knew this—recognized this—you were essentially powerless to do anything about it.
You were in too deep, this was your life now, and such a thought was both comforting and suffocating. On the one hand, you knew what was in store for you. The rest of your days were laid out before you so meticulously, a breakdown of what every single day would be like for the rest of your life. In a way…it was relieving to think that you’d never have to expend any more effort into planning a single thing about your life ever again.
…but in the same breath, that was so tragic.
The excitement of possibilities and opportunities was something you’d never feel again. You’d never have that wonder about what the next day or month or even year would bring. You briefly recalled fleeting thoughts of grad school once and possibly living abroad for a while. Peter would never allow that, and even if he wanted to, Steve would never allow him to even consider the thought.
This was your life now.
Such a simple sentence brought on far too many emotions for you to handle, and so you didn’t. Handle them, that is. You didn’t feel anything and it didn’t just start and end with the complexities of your heart. You didn’t feel the pillow beneath your head nor the thin sheets over your frame. You didn’t even feel the shift in the room when someone—no doubt Margaret or Christine—opened the door and descended the stairs to bring you food.
Surely you ate.
You were still alive, after all, but you didn’t recall eating. Truth be told, you didn’t even recall bathing or using the bathroom. If you thought long and hard about it—struggling with your memory so much that it made you frown in the darkness—you could recollect brief flashes of memories that painted a picture.
Sharon’s worried face before you as she held some orange juice in front of your face, Margaret standing in front of you in the bathroom, tone pleading as she encouraged you to empty your bladder, and even Tony and Pepper standing over your bed as Pepper said something to him, her stricken expression clear even in hazy memories.
The days and everything that happened in them blended together so seamlessly that it all started to feel like a dream. How funny it was that you once feared the basement so much it was enough to give you a panic attack, and now that you were down here you felt the calmest you’d ever felt in months. You felt unreal—untouchable even in a way—and it wasn’t long before you forgot that this wasn’t meant to be forever.
You forgot that a day would come where Peter would come down—likely with Steve in tow—and tell you that your punishment was over and you could finally rejoin him amongst the world above ground. You didn’t know how you felt about that, and you found yourself wondering if you even wanted that.
Of course, you wanted that.
You couldn’t live in darkness and solitude forever, but stepping out of this room meant going back to the problems the basement currently shielded you from. When you stepped through that threshold again, Steve and Bucky and all of the other husbands would likely still be upset with you with the mentioned being more cross than the others. You would have to step back into an atmosphere where you weren’t trusted—again—and you’d have to earn it all back…again.
You supposed you still had friends in the wives, but who was to say. Yes, you’d remained silent when you witnessed Nat escape, but you had a feeling that someone like Margaret likely wouldn’t agree with what you did. You recalled a conversation you had with her once about the needs and sanctity of the house coming first. Allowing one of the wives to escape and possibly ruin everything wasn’t exactly in line with that.
Nat didn’t seem upset with you, at all the last time you saw her, but you didn’t truly know verbatim what Peter had said to Bucky to get him to take her out of the basement. Sure, he could’ve insinuated that keeping her down here and punishing her in a harsh manner after they’d been trying for a baby wasn’t smart, but he also could have flat out said to him that according to you, Nat thinks she's pregnant.
You only wanted to save her, and while you liked to think she’d understand if she knew you told Peter, you also weren’t so sure. You weren’t sure of a lot of things anymore, and your uncertainty about so much—the result of whatever truth you thought you were living being turned upside down—made you retreat into yourself even more.
“Y/N, you need to eat something…”
The familiar voice faintly reached your ears, and as you slowly turned your head, you thought to yourself that you hadn’t even heard Margaret open the door and walk down the stairs. She was staring at you with an expression you couldn’t quite name, and it was only after some time did you register the weight in your lap.
Your gaze landed on a tray of food, and as appetizing as the toast and eggs and sausage looked, you had no desire to eat. You felt lucid for the first time in ages, and you slowly blinked before shaking your head. The words to tell her you weren’t hungry were on the tip of your tongue, but the redhead spoke before you could find your voice.
“You barely ate anything yesterday. And the day before…and the day before,” she breathed. “Steve wants to see an empty plate.”
You blinked again at that, and despite the fact that she was repeating Steve’s words, you could see her own concern in her eyes. You struggled to recall just how long you’d been down here and just how many plates you’d barely touched. You couldn’t recall, and despite the nagging at the back of your mind, you couldn’t bring yourself to want to eat.
Even so, you and Margaret knew better than anyone how Steve could be, and so you slowly reached out for a piece of toast.
“I’ll eat,” was all you said.
She seemed relieved as she left you—albeit reluctantly—and you nibbled on the bread in your hand. The taste of it on your tongue made your stomach twist, and you put the rest of it back down without thinking. You had every intention of finishing it later, but once your food was set aside, all you wanted to do was sleep.
Your sleep wasn’t dreamless, and it rarely ever was. Sometimes you dreamt of your mom and your friends and your life before Peter took you for himself like some villain. Those dreams served nothing more than to torment you, and you often woke from them with tears in your eyes, vision blurry even in the darkness.
More often than not though, you dreamt of Peter and your life here. Sometimes it was awful nightmares about Steve—and even Bucky sometimes—where his handsome face was contorted in that perpetual frown it always seemed to be in when he laid eyes on you. Only it would be so much worse.
Your brain liked to conjure up visions of him where he was absolutely murderous, and it was no secret as to why. There’d been the brief moment here and there where you wondered if Steve would just say ‘to hell’ with all of his rules and get rid of you—in the most violent and dismissive fashion—and force Peter to find a sane wife.
A better one.
That left a bitter taste in your mouth…and you hated it.
You liked to think that the thought of Peter with someone else only upset you because you didn’t think any woman deserved to be subjected to this. You liked to think that righteously and noble of yourself, but the truth was much more demented and depraved and twisted. No woman did deserve any of this, that was true, but the thought of Peter loving someone else made your stomach churn.
You could say it until you were blue in the face that this wasn’t love—it couldn’t be—but it didn’t change how you felt. You couldn’t fathom the thought of being tossed aside and replaced, and being replaced by someone better would only add insult to the injury. It wasn’t fair that they got to break you until there was hardly anything left only to cast you aside because they didn’t like the inevitable results of their choices.
The thought made you want to be sick.
Peter would never, and you knew without a doubt that he would never, but for all that he put you through, the least he could do was remain by your side and look after you forever. Something deep within you hated him so much for what he did—the dark-haired man worse than you initially thought him to be—but a larger part, the part that had been carefully put back together by him, only wanted him to show an endless display of apologies for the rest of your days.
You deserved that.
You deserved to be free, but that was never happening, and as it were, could you even function properly if you were allowed to walk off of this property tomorrow? Your mind didn’t work the way it did before you were brought here. It had been taken apart and scrambled and replaced with one that wasn’t your doing. You feared that you would never be able to function right again, and who would want you?
Who would want you besides Peter?
You were an abused, broken, and genuinely unwell mess…and Peter loved you for it…in his own way. You could see it in his eyes whenever he looked at you that the thought of losing you would send him over the edge, and you knew you felt the same, but you were sure it was for entirely different reasons. At this point in your life…what were you without Peter?
When you weren’t dreaming of your friends and family, and when you weren’t conjuring up nightmares of a familiar blond, you were dreaming about the man who put you into this mess. Sometimes you dreamt about who he actually was and in those dreams there was no doubt about his motives and his actions and you felt the appropriate fear when staring into his eyes.
…but more often than not you dreamt about the man he manipulated you into loving. You dreamed about welcoming him home from work and kissing him and touching him. You dreamed about the days where he simply held you as you cried, conveniently ignoring that he was the reason for your tears. In this house of horrors, Peter was your safe place, and you knew that was purposely done, but again, you felt powerless to do anything about it.
It shouldn’t be that way, but your only other choice was to spend the rest of your days in torment.
“She hasn’t eaten properly in weeks,” the soft words reached your ears, and you knew they weren’t meant for you.
There was a beat of silence, and as you were slowly gripped by consciousness, you took note of the smell of food. It didn’t tempt you, and you almost turned your head away.
“Do you think it’s because of Peter?”
Jane.
You absentmindedly wondered why she was down here and not resting. You hated to think that she’d come down here just to check in on you when she should’ve been looking after herself. You felt her hand on your head.
“She hasn’t seen him in a month…and we know how she—how they can get…”
You squeezed your eyes tight at that, heart aching for the first time in forever at those words. Had it been that long already? Had you really gone a month without seeing him, talking to him, touching him? Was that the cause of this…numbness? You were sure Peter wasn’t the only factor here, but you couldn’t deny that you missed him. You weren’t used to being without him, and this was the longest you’d ever gone without being with him since you first woke up in this house.
…but you knew that this was as much of a punishment for him as it was for you.
What if he didn’t miss you at all? What if you were in hell while each day only brought him more peace not having to be around the crazy one? That thought made your heart ache more, and for a brief moment, you never wanted to see him again.
“Steve only thinks it’s been a handful of times, but she’s not eating. At first, we weren’t too alarmed, especially considering…”
You placed Margaret’s voice now as she trailed off.
“...but then every tray just went basically untouched, and she’s lost a lot of weight. I think we need to tell Steve to contact Dr. Banner.”
You recalled a familiar face with glasses and dark hair.
“She doesn’t use the bathroom every day either. She mostly sleeps,” the redhead added.
“Have you mentioned this to Peter?”
“So he can come barging down here and start a whole other thing with Steve? They’ve only just settled back into being civil with one another. If Peter finds out she’s like this…”
Margaret scoffed, and you detected the unease in her tone.
You had never thought about the aftermath that followed your punishment and how it might have affected things upstairs. You had never thought to, you supposed. You had just assumed that Peter would fall in line with what Steve wanted as usual. After all, no matter how you felt about what you’d done, the household—or more importantly the husbands—did not agree. You’d broken their rules, and rules were rules.
It had never occurred to you that this whole ordeal—and you being at the center of it—might cause friction between Peter and Steve.
You were pulled from your thoughts by the sound of your name, and you were loathed to admit that it took so much of your strength to open your eyes. Jane was as pregnant as ever and glowing, and she gave you a small smile when your gazes met.
“Do you want to try eating something today?
Her tone was light, but you detected a hint of pleading.
Your gaze shifted, and you looked at the tray of food in Margaret’s hands. You eyed it, wanting to eat for their peace of mind if nothing else, but you couldn’t bring yourself to. You swallowed, and Jane must have seen the guilt and conflict in your eyes.
“It’s okay,” she assured you. “You don’t have to.”
You didn’t miss Margaret’s look.
“We’ll leave it here, and you eat when you’re ready.”
She touched your face, and with a few lingering looks, they left you.
It wasn’t long before you dozed off again, but it wasn’t a deep sleep, and you drifted in and out of consciousness. It felt like no matter how much you slept, you just couldn’t shake the feeling of being exhausted. Exhausted, not tired. Your whole body seemed to ache, and you dreaded the moment you’d have to get up and shower.
The next time you were even halfway lucid, you felt a hand at your back and a spoon at your lips. On instinct, you turned your head away, but the person’s hand was firm.
“None of that. You need something on your stomach,” the voice was just as firm as the grip, and it was comfortingly familiar.
Your eyes widened a bit at the familiar face, and you unintentionally parted your lips, allowing her to give you a taste of broth. It took you by surprise, and you coughed a bit, but swallowed it nonetheless. Nat gave you another spoonful, and so in shock at her presence, you accepted it.
“Sharon’s supposed to be in my place…but…Steve and Bucky are at work,” she shrugged, and you couldn’t take your eyes off of her. “...and I had to see you.”
For the first time in a month or so, you felt…something. For a brief moment, your perpetual numbness had lifted, and you both spoke at the same time.
“I’m sorry.”
It was said by two different voices, but it echoed as one.
“You’re sorry…?” Confusion filled you. “Why are you sorry?”
Your voice was small and unsure, and Nat looked so like you were unused to seeing her. She was normally so strong and fierce—a great source of envy for you—but now she looked sad…and regretful.
“You felt more obligated to protect me than yourself…and had I thought for a moment that you’d see me…I never would’ve left.”
Your shoulders fell at that, and you hated that Nat felt…guilty over your predicament. Your own choices had led you here, and that was what you told her after clearing your throat.
“It doesn’t change the fact that I thought the best thing that could happen was I’d get help and we’d all leave this place…and the worst was that I’d get dragged back,” she fed you more broth. “Not once had I considered that someone else would get dragged into my mess.”
You didn’t quite know how to respond, because after all, you didn’t really agree with her. You hadn’t felt obligated to do anything. It seemed like a no brainer to you to not say that you saw her that night. It was never even a question, never even a consideration to tell Peter Nat had escaped.
You swallowed, only taking a tiny sip when she offered you another spoonful. The green-eyed woman frowned at that.
“Nat…”
The words were on the tip of your tongue, but she merely shook her head.
“Bucky was practically ready to flog me for leaving him,” she lightly said despite the severity of the topic. “When they threw me down in here, I was prepared for it. Even with my possible delicate condition.”
Your eyes met hers, and she sent you a crooked smile.
“I knew only one person could talk them out of whatever they prepared to do to me…and I knew there was only one thing you could say that would change their minds…” you bit your lip at that. “Thankfully, I thought wrong, but even if I was pregnant, I’d still understand why you did it.”
She gave a small, bitter laugh.
“I may not have agreed with it nor been the biggest supporter of that decision…but I get it,” she shrugged. “After they found out what you did, I think I was scared for you more than I’d ever been scared for anyone…and I imagine that’s what you’d felt like.”
Your gaze found the sheet on your legs.
“If I had known something that could save you too, I might’ve done the same.”
When she offered you more broth, you sadly shook your head. A look passed over her features at that, and her face fell. She set the spoon back in the bowl with a small sigh before standing.
“I had to check on you,” she told you. “They said you haven’t been eating, and I didn’t realize how bad it was…”
You noticed the way she eyed you, and you suddenly had the urge to find a mirror. She set the bowl down, and she looked unsure about it.
“I’m going to leave this here. Just in case…” she trailed off, a bout of worry crossing her features. “I’ll come check on you again when I can.”
You nodded at her words, but the shock from Nat’s presence and the few sips of broth had taken more energy than you cared to focus on, and you were already sliding back down in bed.
It took her a long time to climb the stairs and shut the door behind her.
It could’ve been days later when you heard the low timber of a voice that wasn’t wholly familiar to you. It scratched some part of your brain, but not enough for you to pinpoint where you’d heard the tone before. Unfamiliar fingers were prodding at your face and neck, and the feel had you frowning in your semi consciousness.
The man hummed to himself.
He was speaking, but you were in and out of sleep, so you couldn’t tell—nor cared—if he was speaking to you or someone else whose presence you weren’t aware of. A voice spoke back, and both sounded so muffled and far away to you.
You felt those same fingers on other parts of your body, as well as cold metal, and the intense temperature against your warm skin made you jolt a bit. You pushed at the hand, but a voice shushed you, but it didn’t sound close enough to have the intended soothing effect. Words were exchanged again, but you were already falling back asleep.
It was a dreamless sleep, the first in a long time, and it made the passage of time feel like a blink.
A voice so hauntingly and achingly familiar to you reached your ears, and you thought you were dreaming.
“I don’t give a fuck about what Steve would’ve wanted. His wife is healthy and coherent and probably getting ready to give him another Goddamn baby,” the voice hissed, interrupting a smaller more feminine one. “She’s been like this for weeks, and no one said a word to me.”
“Peter-.”
“Dr. Banner should’ve been here weeks ago. I should’ve known about this weeks ago. I should have seen her weeks ago…!”
Sleep was pulling you back in again, and the louder the voice got, the more it started to fade. The wrathful pitch grew higher and higher but also fainter and fainter until it was gone entirely, and sleep welcomed you again.
Your mind was struggling to put pieces together, and in your sleep, you thought to yourself that those words sounded like they came from some demented doppelganger, the tone sounding so much like Peter but not at the same time. You had never heard him so angry, and a voice in your head convinced you that you dreamt it, used to a sweet disposition from your dark captor, the dichotomy of which never failed to throw you into greater mental turmoil.
When your senses came to you again, you felt stronger than you had in probably two months at this point. You weren’t entirely sure, completely confused by the passage of time. The basement smelled different, and even the bed felt different, but as you shifted, you understood why.
The numbness that you had started to find comfort in was gone, and you could feel the bed and pillows and sheets beneath you…and they felt familiar. Too familiar. They felt like home. They felt like the place where you’d spent hours in Peter’s arms and hours sleeping and hours accepting the affections of the man who’d kidnapped you.
You thought you might have conjured the feeling up, but then you inhaled, and Peter’s scent filled your nose, and you thought of the nights he’d slept here alone in your absence. The faintest of touches disturbed the back of your hand, so featherlight that you could almost ignore it, but the slight pressure in your chest wouldn’t let you.
When you opened your eyes, his face was the first thing you saw.
His hair was a little longer, a little curlier and brushing his ears, and his face was as pretty as ever, but the dark circles beneath his eyes betrayed his sleepless nights. Had you the strength to move, you would’ve reached out to touch them.
Peter was knelt beside the bed you shared and his hand was in yours and his brown eyes lit up at the sight of your own. His face shifted so suddenly and seamlessly that you would've sworn he’d been smiling at your sleeping face this entire time instead of with that pinched brow and clenched jaw you’d been initially met with.
“Hey,” he softly and slowly greeted, dragging the word out in a whisper. “...my pretty girl.”
You swallowed, blinking a few times before briefly glancing around to confirm you were where you thought you were. Your gaze caught onto the medical equipment by the bed, blinking at the bag two feet above you with unidentifiable liquid in it. You absentmindedly reached up with your free hand as you traced the direction of the tube.
“Hey, hey,” Peter softly admonished, taking your other hand too. “Don’t touch it.”
You looked down at the feeding tube going into your chest, and you felt your heart skip a beat. Confusion filled you, and you were just about to speak when Peter let one of your hands go to take your chin instead. Still in the process of escaping sleep, you could only blink at him, a million questions running through your mind that you didn’t have the capability to voice.
“You’re really weak and…you haven’t been eating,” you watched his face as he said this, and you took note of the dark shadow that passed over his features, and you thought to yourself that perhaps you hadn’t dreamt that interaction at all. “Dr. Banner gave you that because you need to eat.”
Peter appeared to get choked up, and your eyes widened a tad. Sniffing, he rose a bit to press his lips to yours, fingers brushing over your cheek.
“You need to eat, you need all your strength,” you felt his tears on your face. “...because we’re going to have a baby.”
He pulled away only enough to look into your eyes, his own looking between them as he spoke.
“My pretty girl is going to have a baby,” he whispered more to himself than you. “...and you want her to be healthy and fat, don’t you?”
His thumb brushed over your lips, but it was hard to focus on anything he said after ‘baby’.
“I need you both healthy,” he said, voice cracking, and he kissed you again.
His arms circled around you, and you felt his wet face fall to rest against your neck and shoulder. He kissed the skin there that peeked through above the large shirt, his whispered happy words reaching your ear.
“My baby’s having a baby.”
#peter parker x reader#dark!peter parker#dark peter parker#dark Peter Parker x reader#dark!Peter Parker x reader#peter parker fanfiction#peter parker imagine#dark fic#dark marvel#marvel fanfiction#marvel imagine
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Fated Souls
Warnings: Angst, Light Smut, 18+
Lucien Here | Azriel Here
***
You observed the celebration around you, watching your friends as they interacted with one another. You brought your wine glass to your lips, taking another slow sip. You had chosen to stick to the edges of the room for this gathering. It was easier that way. You didn’t have to pretend that your heart wasn’t being tortured with every beat it made.
Truthfully, you’d lost count of what glass of wine this was. You enjoyed the way the edges of the room blurred the more you drank, allowing you to pretend it’s all a horrid nightmare instead of your devastating reality.
Until your eyes caught upon them once again. You scowled, tipping your head back as you emptied your drink. Your eyes narrowed as you watched him smile down at her, his hand itching to hold onto her waist. She looked at him with such adoration that you’d have to be brainless to miss it. Everyone knew about the Shadowsinger and middle Archeron sister. You could argue that they turned a blind eye because they wished to see the pair happy, if it weren’t for the fact that their mates were just as widely known.
You rolled your eyes as she let out a soft laugh, placing a hand on the chest of the male that was supposed to be fated to you. Not that he cared. You were tired of this, the constant pining for someone who would never want you. Growing sick of their love-show, you slipped quietly from the room. No one noticed, or if they did they didn’t care. You had become quite a depressing specimen since Elain entered your life.
And since the mating bond snapped to Azriel, who only had eyes for her. Your friends did not know how to speak to you these days, always teetering in awkward conversation. They looked at you as if they stared too close you’d shatter into a thousand pieces. You were fragile, breakable.
It wasn’t always that way. Before this you were one of the fiercest warriors the Night Court had. You held your own against Cassian, earning a place of honor as his right hand. You were a force to be reckoned with. “The Lovely Demon” they called you, whispers of your power and beauty flitting throughout all of Prythian. It made sense for you to be fated to Azriel, the devilishly handsome spymaster. Together you were a death sentence.
A death sentence indeed. You moved throughout the halls, searching for the only one who understood your pain. You were pleased when you found him alone on one of the countless balconies in the House of Wind, leaning over the railing with his own drink in hand. You walked out to him, your heels clicking softy on the stone. He did not turn to look at you, even when you leaned on the railing next to him.
“Beautiful night,” he spoke first, looking intently at the stars. You followed his line of sight, humming in response. Nothing was beautiful to you now.
The two of you stood like that for some time, in an understanding silence. The silver fabric of your dress glowed under the starlight, a sight that would have filled you with confidence before. Now you hardly even noticed.
“Were they…” he began, trailing off. The words were too hard to be spoken aloud, but you knew what he meant. Were they all over each other again? You nodded, noting the way he slung his whiskey back at the action. “Do you think it will ever hurt less?”
Did you? You couldn’t imagine a world in which it didn’t, but surely it wouldn’t be this way forever. You turned to look at him then, taking in the defeated form of the once strong man you knew.
Lucien had been through a lot in the last five centuries. Hel, you all had. No one was the same as they once were. But your friend had suffered more than most, and yet his suffering was brushed under the rug by the Inner Circle. You loved them dearly, yes, yet they oftentimes only focused on themselves. In all honesty you had been the same way before. All that mattered was that you and your family were happy. Others problems could come later.
Once the bond snapped and Azriel chose to ignore it, things changed. You quickly discovered that he meant more to them than you did. Not that they didn’t try to help you, of course. Mor spent many a night lying in your bed with you, holding you tight while tears ran down your face. Nesta brought you books, the closest to acknowledging the messed up way Azriel was acting. But in the end, his feelings would always win. His happiness was more important than yours.
“I can only hope it does,” you finally answered. He finally turned to face you as well, the pain in his eyes like looking in a mirror.
“How do we cope?”
You shook your head, a sad smile playing on your lips. “When you find out, please let me know.”
You stared at each other for a long moment. Perhaps it was the copious amount of alcohol you had ingested, or perhaps it was the deep sadness controlling your heart, but you couldn’t help to notice how stunning Lucien was. Even in his pain drenched form he radiated a sense of power and confidence not many others could. You simply could not wrap your head around Elains distaste for him. You understood she had her own traumas to work through, but she could do worse. You knew Lucien would be kind to her.
Unfortunately she wanted your mate instead. The thought sends a wave of nausea through your body. Lucien noticed the subtle change in your already heartbroken demeanor, reaching his hand out to yours. You gladly held on to him, tears brimming in your eyes. “It’s not fair,” you whispered, the pain building up inside of you. He shook his head, pulling you close to him. He wrapped his arm tight around your waist, the hand on his other one tangling into your hair. You rested your face on the crook of his neck as gasping sobs tore through your very soul. Your nails dug into his shirt, holding onto him as if you were desperately searching for something to ground you. Something to remind you that life still existed, and it wasn’t just you lost in the tumultuous sea of your grief.
Your heart was falling apart. You knew you were not only going to lose Azriel if this continued. If he did fully choose Elain, and she him, your life would be over. Your family would gladly welcome them as one, celebrating their love and joy. You wouldn’t be able to live as you once did. You would flee the Night Court entirely, possibly leaving a note for Rhysand. You couldn’t be sure if he would even notice your absence in the wake of joy for his brother. Though could you blame him? Your soul sang for Azriel’s happiness. It was tearing you apart that it wasn’t with you.
You clung tighter to Lucien, hands shaking. His fingers were tracing patterns in your hair, trying to soothe your fractured mind. “He doesn’t deserve you,” he murmured. His words gave you pause, pulling your face off his shoulder to look up at him. His eyes were glassy, the tears he held refusing to be shed.
“What?” You asked, your voice weak. Lucien looked intently at you, moving his hand to cup your face. His thumb brushed away your tears, a deep sorrow in his eyes.
“It is wrong of him to allow you to be in pain as such. Elain, I give her more grace than most would. But Azriel?” He spoke the shadowsingers name as if it were a curse. “He has no excuse. You have been together centuries now, close as two can be. It should have been an instant joy, the mating bond between you. And yet,” he sighs deeply, thumb tracing your skin once more. “He’s gotten it into his head that he has to be with an Archeron like his brothers.” Your heart stutters as his thumb traces your bottom lip, a fire beginning to rage in his eyes. “He’s taken it upon himself to steal away my mate, while ignoring his own. A sorry thing, too, when she is as lovely as the night she so graciously represents.” His hand slides down to trace your jawline, fire burning your skin wherever he touched. This was wrong. You were both heartbroken, tossed aside by your mates. Friends, yes, but lovers? No. You should pull away, stop this before it goes too far. This was wr-
Oh.
Your head tilted back and your mouth opened slightly as Lucien’s lips met your neck. He kissed your skin like it was his honor to do so, like he would never get the chance again. His lips traveled up to your jaw, kissing slowly across your cheek. You couldn’t breathe as your eyes fluttered closed, lips ready for his.
“Tell me to stop,” he whispered against your skin, nose brushing yours. You knew you should. If you allowed him to kiss you fully you would be fully admitting that Azriel was a lost hope and dream. Allowing another male to touch you in a way only your mate should.
Did it matter when that mate was too busy catching the attention of someone who wasn’t you? When all he wanted was her pretty little mouth on his? What is the harm in you finding what pleasure you could in the wake of the pain he had bestowed upon your very being?
“Kiss me.”
Lucien’s lips met yours with a fervor, an intensity you didn’t know you craved. Arousal began to spread through your body, a need for him that overtook all other thought. You pulled him closer, allowing him to cage you in against the balcony railing. You welcomed his tongue into your mouth, moaning quietly at the taste of him. His hands fell to your waist, one fisting the fabric as his restraint was rapidly fading. “He’s a fool for letting you go,” he said into your mouth, a shiver of delight running down your spine at his words.
“So is she.” His eyes flared and he kissed you again, his hand slowly working your dress up. You gasped as the cool night air danced across your heated skin. You knew you shouldn’t be doing this at all, much less right where anyone could see. The thought of someone catching you made your heart race with scandalous excitement. Not that anyone would have even noticed the two of you were gone.
Lucien’s hand flattened against your bare thigh, having pulled your dress high enough to expose the skin there. You felt alive under his touch, like you were finally being seen. You kissed him as if he were the sun and you were lost in an endless night. His fingers trailed to the inside of your thigh, a hum of surprise coming from him when he discovered you wore nothing under your gown. He found you quickly, pressing gently down on your clit. You gasped into his mouth, arching against him in pleasure. He worked you expertly, moving his fingers like he was put on this world just to please you.
His lips fell from yours, pressing quick kisses on your neck. “I want you hear you,” he whispered into your ear, allowing his thumb to take over the delicious pressure his fingers had been providing. He moved them down, sliding them gently into you. He curled them once he was deep inside, the feeling overpowering. You tilted your head back as you moaned his name, forgetting everything except for him. When Lucien touched you there was no pain from an unwanted mating bond, no thoughts of why you weren’t good enough. There was only you and him. He was painting fire into your soul, giving you the light you needed to live.
Until you felt him be ripped away from you as something cold wound it’s away around your body.
***
i have two separate endings for this! one for lucien and one for azriel <3. i just loved this idea and then couldnt decide which way i wanted it to go haha. i hope you enjoyyyyyy
#acotar x reader#acotar x you#acotar x y/n#azriel x reader#azriel x y/n#azriel x you#lucien vanserra x you#lucien x you#lucien x y/n#lucien vanserra smut#lucien vanserra x reader#lucien x reader smut#fated souls
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More of the Yandere Warlord please :3
Ask and ye shall receive anon
His return- Yandere warlord x fem reader
You're the first person he visits on his return from raids. Sometimes still stained in another man's blood, he doesn't take the time to change before coming to greet you. You first assumed it would be his mother he meant to meet first, she is the de facto ruler in his absence you're thankful no one looks to you for leadership. No expectations to be fulfilled apart from bearing his heirs in good time.
But he chooses your side to return to first. If in public, amongst his mother's court or the gaggle of ladies appointed to your company and service, he is performative with his greeting. Kneeling before you and pressing your hand against his head, before presenting the gifts he's returned with. You try to not think about the original owner of the jewellery he drapes around your body, no good would come from thinking of the fate you would have shared had you not caught his eye.
However if he finds you in the privacy of the forest outside the corral or within your yurt he does away with the ritual. Embracing you tightly and throwing you in the air as you yelp for him to put you down on your own feet. He twirls you around instead, entranced at how you look dressed in the clothing befitting your new station. You are becoming less startled when you catch your own reflection in bodies of water or the looking glass he has brought you. The you from before this would never be wearing silk trimmed with fur and jewels, be painted and perfumed every morning.
You first assumed that with time you'd gradually lose his affection and infatuation once he'd be bored of you and find some other woman to take your place. You quickly learnt your assumptions about him were wrong
He places his face down the crook of your neck inhaling deeply.“I missed you, my little wife, I thought of you every night I had to sleep with only the bugs and snores of my men for company.”He groans into your skin as he latches onto your shoulder
“There will be a feast in the coming days as always with our return, I sent a scout ahead of our arrival so that there would be time to prepare for it,” In all the time since his ascension he has never brought his people to a raid or battle that he would not emerge victorious. He tells you this with such pride in his eyes, as though this knowledge will help win your affections “but for today I only wish to celebrate my success with you.”
Part of you, the part of you that's too much like your mother wants to say that of course he wins against unarmed farmers and merchants. But the other part of you knows that although he finds you adorable and amusing he would find no humour in that statement. Unfortunately you only came to those thoughts after the words escaped your mouth. He lets go of you, pulling back to look at you properly.
He is quiet for a moment, giving contemplation to your words. “It is our way of life. Without showing strength, others will assume we are weak and attack us in turn. You do not understand this yet, nor do I expect you to. But in time, I hope you will see yourself as one of us, my love, I already do, and so does everyone else on the steppe.” He kisses you gently if only to end that conversation. “Come, I wish to bathe together.” He pulls you along with him to the bath house, again prepared in advance by silent hands.
You still feel awkward when you strip before him, he is your husband and has seen and had your body in a multitude of ways. Yet still you make yourself as small as possible once you're out of your underthings, pulling your hair down to hide behind it. You step into the large bath quickly, not wanting to stand bare before him for any moment longer than most. He steps in after you, as you try to pivot your gaze from the monster of a thing between his legs. Every time you catch sight of it you wonder how he hasn't managed to tear you in half.
Without warning he pulls you against his chest, slotting precariously on his lap as the water sloshes. Giving out a sigh of satisfaction as he throws his head back, he only wears his hair down when he bathes or sleeps. It is far longer than yours, dark with a reddish flash in the light, thick as fur. He opens one eye to catch you staring.
“A true man is only to let his wife tend to his hair, to see it unbraided and to take ahold of it, only she can see him at his most vulnerable ” he smirks as he pulls you tighter against his chest. His arms grazing your breasts, you try not to squeal.
“What if he had multiple wives, or concubines?” you ask, hoping to change the subject before he focuses on what other reactions he can twist from your body.
“then he shall pick his chief wife to tend to his hair, and besides concubines do not count.” He laughs in your ears as though you've said the most amusing thing he has heard.
“Would you take other wives or concubines?” you don't even understand why the idea upsets you so. Perhaps it is the possibility of losing the life you live under his care. Despite your seriousness as you tentatively ask he begins to howl with laughter that you could ask such a thing with such genuineness as you are sat naked in his lap.
“How could I take any other woman in my bed when I have you? If I ever did she would only be mine in name only for purely political reasons. You do not need to worry for your status.” He rubs his thumb in circles atop your cheek. Pleased at the thought that you could be jealous of some woman who doesn't exist for his attention.
Once the water has cooled and your fingers become wrinkled he lifts you from the tub before he steps out, once he puts you down he stares unabashedly at your naked body “So beautiful, how can you be so perfectly beautiful no matter how I look at you? How could I ever spare a second glance at another woman when I have you?”
#yandere imagines#yandere drabble#yandere#yandere oc#fem reader#male yandere#yandere x reader#anon ask#yandere warlord
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Scarlet End

Mr Scarletta x Reader
(Anything in bold is in the other world language)
How did you end up here? In those apartments? In this other world? Could it really all have been fate?
No. It was all his fault. Ever since you spilt blood on his property, you were in the palm of his hand. He toyed with your reality like it was all just a game to him. You supposed that likely wasn't far from the truth.
How many days had you been running? Every corner you turned brought you face to face with a new monster, difficult to distinguish between friend or foe. Although you suppose you probably didn't look much better at this point. Blood slipped through the cracks of your raincoat, staining the white dress underneath as you fell to your knees. You were so tired. Even if you could keep running, where would you go? All you could see for miles was an ocean of red. And your hunter didn't suffer the same exhaustion you did.
Shade falls over you. Although now that you think about it, was there ever a light source to begin with? Either way, you don't have to raise your head to know that a red umbrella was covering you. Not to mention the telltale static that always managed to make your teeth throb.
He says something incomprehensible.
No, you know this one. It's the same thing he asks for every time he sees you.
"Give name?"
You finally raise your head to look at him. His red hair covered most of his face, but you could still catch a glimpse of his haunting eyes staring at you, unblinking.
You clumsily utter out what you think is the equivalent of "Why?"
"Me like you. You give name, me ??? you."
What was that word again? It was one Mr Crawling used often. Something like... protect.
"Protect you."
Could he really protect you? Judging by the reactions of everyone else here, you were under the impression that he was the one you needed protection from. The voice on the telephone seemed adamant that you not tell anyone your name. But could you really trust that voice? They hadn't led you astray yet.
They also said you would have to make a choice.
All things considered, this is Mr Scarletta's world. Either you refuse and keep running for the rest of your life, or you join Scarletta in his reign of terror. Your crowbar digs into your shoulder, reminding you of your past. When you stop to think about it, you're not so different from Scarletta. Maybe you're even worse.
"Name... Y/n."
His eerie smile grew more than you thought was possible.
"Y/n." He repeats.
His hand is cold and rubbery, not unlike a corpse, as he takes your own. The fact that he was incorporeal when you swung your crowbar at him a few minutes ago nags at the bag of your mind. Your brow creases in annoyance, but if Scarletta notices he doesn't say anything. It really was true that this world was stacked against you.
Scarletta rises to his full height, pulling you up with him. It takes a great deal of effort to force your aching muscles to stretch once more, and your knees nearly buckle again. Amidst your struggle to right yourself, he hands you his umbrella, much to your confusion. Before you can ask why, he scoops you into his arms bridal style. You supposed this was his way of showing that he cared.
Under the cover of the red umbrella, you feel isolated from the rest of the world. Even if that world was only a wasteland of red for right now. Fear grips your throat as you meet his awful eyes. They were even worse up close. Even now, having gotten what he wanted, his expression seemed the same as always. Being so close, the static was almost deafening as it continued to assault your ears. Perhaps these were all traits that you would grow used to in time.
"Let's go."
#Homicipher#Mr Scarletta#Mr Scarletta x reader#Scarletta x reader#Homicipher Scarletta#mr crawling#mr crawling x reader#Homicipher Mr crawling#Homicipher x reader#mr hood#mr machete#mr silver#mr silvera#mr chopped head#mr hood x reader#mr machete x reader#mr silver x reader#mr silvera x reader#mr chopped x reader#mr chopped#mr red#mr red x reader
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