#and have to be up early to make it on time for train

[batsandbirdbrains]

A thought before I go to bed: Dick Grayson being the test child for essentially every single JL member would do unrepairable psychic & emotional damage. It’s not anything obvious, it’s not anything outright.

But he was their test pancake. The one you put on the griddle to test that the temperature is right and the batter is the way you want it. He turned out a funny shape, burned on one side, and lost half himself before he fully grew up.

And every other child that comes into their lives, every other sidekick after him benefits from his suffering. He’s the one they had to push to the limits to be able to find out what boundaries they should be setting. He’s the one who broke a leg because an adult hero tossed (threw him like a sack of potatoes) way too hard for him to make a landing. He’s the one who got a concussion during training because an adult knocked him down too hard.

He’s the one who got shot by a rogue and then yelled at for it, who got fired (even if it was taken back, even if Bruce swears he was just trying to protect him), he’s the one who got kicked out when he was still a kid. It doesn’t matter that Bruce let him back in. To this day, he hasn’t told Bruce what happened during the four months he spent away from the manor. He doesn’t tell him how he had to play apprentice to Deathstroke the Terminator. He doesn’t tell anyone what he had to do to escape.

He’s the one they forgot on special occasions the first time and then after that made sure to never forget a kid’s special day they were invited to ever again.

One person showed up to Dick Grayson’s high school graduation. He was salutatorian and graduating a year early. Alfred Pennyworth was the only one there, watching, clapping for him, taking photographs, congratulating him. Took him out to dinner to celebrate then had to watch as Dick cried over a bowl of pasta he didn’t even end up eating.

Everyone else either forgot or put the mission first. Dick never forgives any of them. He never forgets it. He may not bring it up, he may not hold it over their heads, but he’ll never forget how alone and worthless he felt when he looked out into the crowd as he was giving his speech and he saw an entire section of empty chairs with Alfred sitting on the end.

He listens to their excuses and their apologies. But then he sees every other kid after him have a whole section of heroes cheering them on when they get their diplomas, and Dick can’t help but feel bitter about it.

And it sucks, because on one hand, he’s so glad these actual adults aren’t fucking up other kids like how they fucked up him. But on the other hand, why couldn’t they have just been there for him? Why couldn’t they have gotten their shit together for him? Why is was it always him?

Anyway nighty night perhaps I’ll expand upon this thought process tomorrow

[slutzforbueckers]

SHES SAFE WITH ME—CHAPTER 2

♡— pairing: paige bueckers x fem!reader

♡— warnings: smut

♡— synopsis: you accidentally walked in on paige in the bathroom and as the day went on things just got more awkward until they couldn’t.

♡— word count: 7.6k

♡— a/n: the longgggggg awaited chapter two. you already know it’s not proofread at all but anyway enjoy!!!!!

the sun was blaring in your face when you woke up. you groaned as you attempted to slowly blink open your eyes, the sun’s bright light making you close them immediately and turn over. the house was still quiet so you knew it had to still be early, or maybe you’d just slept late and everyone else had left—you weren’t sure. you let out a small groan and blindly felt around for your phone, you pulled it from under your pillow and cracked your eyes open to check the time. 7:57. not bad, you thought.

the birds were chirping extra loud this morning and the roosters sounded like they were right outside your window. you definitely didn’t miss that part about being home again. you figured since it was still pretty early you’d try to get another hour of sleep so you pulled the blankets back up and closed your eyes again.

everything was going great—your body had relaxed again, your mind was already creating some wild dream you’d forget the second you opened your eyes again—but then you felt that pressure in your bladder. you had to pee…really, really bad. you rolled your eyes at the bad timing and rolled over again, sitting up this time.

as you sat on the side of the bed you debated on whether you should really get up or lay back down, but then you remembered some tiktok you saw the other day about the effects of holding your pee and decided to get up. you slid your feet into your pink bunny slippers—the ones you’d had since you were a sophomore in high school—and made your way out of your room.

you walked down the hallway still rubbing your eyes and yawning. the hallway was dim and quiet, you could hear the hum of the a/c unit running but that was all. there was no evidence that anyone else was awake yet so you didn’t bother knocking on the bathroom door before entering. when the door swung open you froze—you were met with the sight of paige standing in the middle of the bathroom, towel wrapped only around her waist, her tits on full display.

steam was still swirling around in the air, the mirror was fogged up, and there were still droplets clinging to her skin—running down her collarbone and into the valley of her breast. her hair was pulled back into a messy bun with a few wet strands falling out.

“oh my god!” you choked out, snapping back into reality from whatever raunchy fantasy your brain had came up with. paige looked up and even though she didn’t say anything her skin flushed a shade of red. she wasn't really embarrassed, how could she be when there was a pretty girl staring at her body like it was the first one she’d ever seen—she was amused. your lips were parted and your eyes were wide but it was like your brain short circuited and didn’t send the signal to your body for you to close the door or even look away.

you knew you probably should’ve looked away but you literally couldn’t. what made it worse was that you weren’t even looking at her face—no, you’re eyes were trained on her abs and chest. paige clearly didn’t mind the gawking—she was quite enjoying it actually. the way your eyes couldn’t focus on one thing, how your eyes were filled with embarrassment and curiosity, and most of all how you hadn’t thought to close the door since you opened it.

“you gonna keeping standing there or…” paige smirked as she trailed off, making no effort to cover herself up or anything. she couldn’t lie and say that the way you were looking at her—like you almost wanted to jump her bones right then and there—wasn’t turning her on. she probably would’ve invited you in if she didn’t have to worry about krystal looking for her, or even just krystal at all.

“right—i’m so sorry—“ you rushed out as you quickly closed the door and you could hear her start to laugh on the other side. you closed your eyes for a second but when you saw the image of paige standing there half naked you opened them again immediately.

“i’m never getting over this.” you mumbled to yourself as you shook your head and made your way back to your room, you didn’t even have to pee anymore. as soon as your bedroom door closed you fell back against it, your head tipping back against it with soft huff. things would be awkward between you now, you knew that for sure, so now all you had to do was come up with a plan.

you could stay in your room all day, locked away with no chance of seeing her, or you could jump out the window and hope you die—either one worked for you. the image would never leave your mind now, every time you looked at her you would see her standing in the bathroom with nothing but a towel.

it would haunt you—become something you saw in your dreams every time you went to sleep. it would follow you all the way back to college. maybe that was being dramatic but you didn’t care.

you walked to the end of your bed and sank down, laying on your back and spreading your arms out above you. you stared at the ceiling for a while, contemplating if you wanted to crawl back into bed or continue on with the day. finally, you decided you’d call your childhood friend and make plans that’ll keep you out of the house all day.

paige on the other hand—she was just as flustered as you, she just didn’t show it. she also knew things would be awkward between you now but she would try her best to act normal and not like she wished she would’ve pulled you into the bathroom and had her way with you.

it’s crossed her mind more than she’d admit—fucking you untill you couldn’t remember your own name—but she had to be normal about it. she couldn’t be obvious about the fact she wanted to fuck her girlfriends daughter.

that would just be…wrong.

there were three loud knocks at your door before it swung open. you turned around and faced her, dropping your makeup brush onto the vanity. krystal waltzed in with a big smile on her face and stood behind you. “great, you’re already up. paige and i want brunch so we’re going down to that little cafe right down the street. care to join?”

the mention of paige made your skin crawl. you turned back towards the mirror and picked up your lip liner, trying to focus on something other than the memory of seeing her naked. you shrugged your shoulders and glanced at krystal through the mirror.

“oh, i already have plans.” you said as you brought the liner up to your lips. krystal sucked her teeth and placed her hand on her hip—giving you that look she always did when your answer wasn't the one she wanted to hear. you rolled your eyes because you should’ve known you weren’t being given a choice in the first place. “right…i’ll be ready in 15.”

“good answer, bug.” she patted your shoulders and gave you a quick kiss on the top of your head before walking out. as soon as the door closed you let out a soft huff because now not only did you have to cancel your plans, you had to face paige for nearly an hour.

you stared blankly into the mirror for a minute—trying to figure out why you came home in the first place—before picking up your phone and calling your friend, tay, on facetime. the phone rang for a minute before it beeped, you scrunched up your face and called again. this time it only rang a couple of seconds and she picked up—you rolled your eyes because, of course, her phone was on dnd so that’s why she didn’t answer the first time.

“i’m on my way! i promise—I just had to get in one more game.” tay rushed out, her locs falling in her face when she bent down to grab her other shoe. you propped your phone up on your vanity and leaned back in your seat with a small huff.

“i can’t go. it’ll have to be some later time.” you frowned. tay’s head snapped up, she looked at you confused and gave you that ‘what gives’ look. you straightened back up and grabbed your eyebrow brush. “mom is making me go to brunch with her and paige. i told her i already had plans but she gave me that look.”

“why’d you say “paige” like that? didn’t you have the hots for her like—12 hours ago.” tay questioned as she walked back to her couch to start up another game of call of duty. you forgot you hadn’t told her about the whole bathroom incident this morning—you were too shocked to tell her.

“oh, right—so, i walked in on paige in the bathroom this morning.” you said, trying to make your voice sound nonchalant even though your heart started racing just thinking about it. tay paused—you heard the soft clicks of her fingers moving on her controller stop—but you didn’t looked at her, you kept your focus to fixing up your eyebrows.

“you did what?!” she exclaimed, picking her phone so quick you might’ve gotten whiplash if you would've felt it.

you shrugged your shoulders—you were trying to not make it sound like such a big deal but in all honesty, now that you had the chance to talk about it you thought you might combust if you didn’t ever last detail out.

“okay, i didn’t mean to do it at all. so i woke up this morning and i had to pee and like it was still pretty early—i figured everyone was still asleep and i didn’t even hear anything while i was walking to the bathroom. anyways, i didn’t knock on the door—because i didn’t think anyone was up—and then when i opened it there she was. standing there with nothing but a towel wrapped around her waist.”

“wait a minute—you saw her naked?” tay asked, her jaw dropping because even though she is pretty dramatic this situation definitely deserves some jaw dropping. you nodded your head with a tight lipped smile. “wowzers. you saw the paige bueckers naked—your stepmom paige bueckers.”

“well, i didn’t see everything. just her tits, but still—how am i supposed to sit through brunch without it being awkward?” you groaned as you shoved all your makeup back into your drawer, you never did care about it being a mess. tay whistled and shook her head, letting her phone drop back onto her lap as she started back playing her game.

“there’s no avoiding that, ma.” she laughed loudly. you rolled your eyes because you knew it was true, things would be awkward between you and paige until you went back to school. there really wasn’t any avoiding it.

“yeah, you’re right.” she sighed. tay hummed and mumbled something about always being right, you rolled your eyes again. “i gotta go, their waiting for me.”

“alright, tell me how it goes. love you!” she picked up the phone and started blowing air kisses to the phone. you pretended to catch them and place them in your heart with a smile before saying a quick ‘love you too’ and hanging up. you set your phone down on the dresser and stood up, checking your outfit in the mirror to determine if it was brunch worthy.

you were wearing a plain black tube top and a pair of denim jorts. you ran your hands down your sides and turned just enough to see check out your ass—yeah, this is perfect. you thought. now all you had to figure out was what shoes you wanted to wear, you walked to your closet and stood in front of your shoe racks. you had so many shoes you didn’t know which one to pick. you weren’t sure if you were feeling sneakers or sandals.

you stepped towards the rack and bent down as if getting closer would help you decide faster—it didn’t. you stood there for a good five minutes just staring at all the options you had. picking an outfit had never been your strong suit and whenever you did know what clothes you wanted to wear you didn’t know what shoes to wear—it was never just a simple task. after a quick game of pick a rabbit you decided to go with your black jordans.

“y/n! good lord girl, you take forever.” krystal groaned as she burst into your room. you were already tying your laces when she came in, you rolled your eyes and stood up from your bed.

“i’m ready, jeez.” you muttered as you grabbed your phone and jacket. krystal shook her head as you walked past her, muttering something under her breath before closing your door behind her.

when you walked down the stairs you spotted paige standing against the wall, one arm folded over her chest and the other holding her phone in front of her. you noticed that she was jorts too and a red crop top—god, she looks good. you thought. she looked up at the sound of footsteps and you looked away immediately, not wanting to make any unnecessary, awkward eye contact. you quickly made your way to the door and grabbed your keys from the key hook.

“and what are you doing, bug?” krystal stopped you just as you wrapped your hand around the doorknob. you stopped in your tracks and slowly turned around. paige was looking at you now—you saw her from the corner of your eye—but you refused to look at her.

“taking my car? we’re all going to the same place.”

“exactly, we’re all going to the same place. no point in taking separate cars.” paige piped in, you dared to look at her and regretted it immediately. she was still standing close to the wall, a little behind krystal, but her hands were shoved in her pockets now and she wore a small smirk that affected you more than it should’ve.

you cleared your throat and nodded, you were much more willing to do what she said when she sounded like that—voice low, like she was chill about the whole thing that happened earlier. you placed your keys back on the hook and waited for them to lead the way.

oh this is going to be a long ride. you thought.

when you arrived at the café, paige held the door for both you and krystal—-paige also took that opportunity to steal a few glances at your ass. she needed to commit the sight to memory for… future references. it could seriously be useful one day—definitely.

everything was going fine—okay, not really. after paige paid and you found a table, somewhere close to the windows so you could have something to distract yourself with, she decided to sit next to you instead of krystal. she used some lame excuse about how she wanted to be able to see everything around her, sitting next to krystal wouldn’t have allowed that.

you saw right through it because as soon as she sat down next to you, she bumped her knee into yours. you held your breath and quietly moved your leg. you tried not to think much of it as you flipped open the menu, but then she did it again and you knew it was definitely not an accident.

“wow, this looks good. what should i get?” krystal muttered—mostly to herself—as she looked through all the options. she was none the wiser to the game paige was playing under the table—was it a game or were you making something out of nothing? who knows. you bit down on your lip as you tried to hurry up and pick something to eat so everything would move along a bit faster.

paige caught the movement out of the corner of her eye, she glanced over at you and shook her head slightly. the only thought that ran through her head was how much she wished she could just reach over and run her thumb across it. she wanted to know if they were as soft as she’d been imagining, they sure looked it. she pulled her eyes away before it got too obvious that she was staring.

“i think i’ll just have the fruit salad.” you said, to no one in particular, and closed the menu. krystal hummed something about how it sounded good before announcing what she was going to have. paige was still flipping through the book, her eyes narrowed and her brows scrunched. you took the chance to look at her, mentally cursing at how good her side profile was.

a few minutes later the waiter appeared with a notepad and pencil in hand, a warm and welcoming smile on his face. he asked if you all were ready to order and you and krystal nodded and gave him your order’s. paige was still deciding, she couldn’t settle on any of the options and having everyone waiting on her almost made her break a sweat.

“i’ll just have what she’s having.” she looked at you to make it clear who she was talking about and that glint in her eye came back—that same one from the bathroom earlier. “sounds like it’ll taste good.”

as soon as those words left her mouth you felt your face get hot and a million thoughts raced through your head all at once: that can’t be real. am i just a hornball or did that have a double meaning? i’m definitely not making it through this brunch.

“alright, i’ll have that out as soon as possible.” the waiter smiled and turned on his heels.

krystal snickered from across the table and you and paige both looked at her. you were confused about what had happened that warranted a laugh. “matching outfits and meals. how cute.”

“right…i’m gonna go to the bathroom.” you pulled your lips into a tight line and excused yourself from the table. did you think her comment was unnecessary? yes. did it make you a little uncomfortable? yes. did it make you think about how good you and paige could be together? also yes.

you tried to walk normally as you went to the bathroom but you could feel eyes on your back and it almost made you skip a step and trip—that would’ve been embarrassing to say the least. the neon bathroom sign came into view and you let out a breath of relief because to you that walk felt like it was 5 miles long with everyone laughing because they somehow knew what was going through your mind.

the wooden door was heavy as you pushed it open but it closed behind you slowly. you walked through and checked every stall to see if anyone was in them and to your surprise it was completely empty—and clean. another good thing you noticed was that they all were fully closed in, no gaps on any of them.

“definitely designed by a women.” you mumbled to yourself as you stepped inside the last stall, closing and locking it behind you. you made sure to clean the toilet seat before you sat down—don’t want to catch any diseases or something.

after you were done you went to the sink and started to wash your hands, checking yourself out in the mirror the entire time. you started to hum some song you’d heard on tiktok earlier and just as you got into it the door swung open. instinctively, you looked up but you were not expecting to see paige walk in. your throat went dry and you looked away immediately

she didn’t say anything—not yet anyways—and neither did you. you finished washing your hands and grabbed a few paper towels, silently praying she’d just go away. as you expected: she didn’t go away. no, she stood right there until you turned around and only then did she start walking towards you. you looked down at your feet and your brain told you to do the only thing it knew to do: talk. a lot.

“paige—this morning i—i didn’t mean to walk in. i was just tired and i didn’t think anyone was awake yet. i should’ve knocked—i’m so sorry—”

“i didn’t mind. you looked cute all…flustered.” she said, cutting you off. your brain short circuited, your lips parting because she definitely did not just say that. she was standing close now—like almost toe to toe close—and that didn’t really help you calm down any more.

you needed to get away like, right now before you started saying things that’ll definitely make thing more awkward, but she smelt so good and you could almost feel her body heat if you’d just leaned in a little bit. your eyes were looking everywhere but her face, like her shoes, jacket, her abs, her arms—god, her arms looked heavenly. so perfect and strong and—put me in a chokehold, oh my lord.

you shook your head as your mind started feeling up with not so innocent thoughts and images, and you really needed to get away from her. “i—i need to—”

“is that why you’re being awkward? you saw my tits, no big deal.” paige shrugged like it really was no big deal—like you seeing her half naked was just another sunny saturday. you finally looked her in the eyes and your lips parted in disbelief.

“no big deal—” you cut yourself off with a dry chuckle and you shook your head before whisper-yelling, “that most definitely is a big deal. you’re dating my mom, remember? i shouldn’t be picturing you—” you paused and your eyes got wide because you essentially just admitted you’d been picturing her naked, “i mean, seeing you naked. half naked, full naked. whatever.”

you ended your rant with a frustrated huff, you’d basically just ruined any chance of peace you had left. there was no way you wouldn’t think of this very day 50 years from now when you’re old and wrinkly and still single. the worst part about it was that paige was just standing there smiling and somehow during your rant you’d moved closer to her.

“you picture me naked?”

“no, i don’t picture you naked.” you scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest and looking towards the stalls. paige hummed and slowly nodded her head, her hand hesitantly reaching out to ghost over your waist. your breath caught in your throat slightly and you finally looked back at her.

“did this start before or after this morning?” she teased, her grin getting slightly wider. you were getting hot again—like burning from the inside out. you felt that flutter in your stomach and you shifted on your heels to distract yourself from the fact that you were five seconds from kissing her if you didn’t leave soon.

paige tilted her head slightly and you scoffed again before bringing your hand to her chest and patting a couple of times. you had no idea where the confidence came from but you weren’t complaining, you leaned into her until your lips brushed the shell of her ear, “in your dreams, paige.”

and with that you brushed passed her and left the bathroom, leaving her standing there with a stupid grin on her face. paige let out a breathy laugh and turned to face the door, she stared at it for a few seconds before shaking her head and muttering to herself: “most definitely.”

when you got back to your table the food was already there and krystal was scrolling on her phone, probably on facebook, but she looked up when you sat down.

“what took so long? where’s paige?” she threw her left hand up in the air dramatically, her eyes narrowing as she questioned you. you shrugged and picked around the fruit salad to see what all was in it.

“some of the stalls were full and the others were down.” you lied and took a glance at her, not long enough for her to see you were lying though. she didn’t say anything but she squinted her eyes slightly before humming and settling back into her seat.

after dinner all you wanted was so shower and get in bed but krystal had other plans, she dragged you and paige into the living room with the game of twister in her hands. you groaned and plopped down on the couch next to paige, making sure to keep enough distance between you.

“mom, you don't even like playing twister. you always say “i’m getting too old for all this twisting and turning shit” like every time we play.” you twisted your face up as you badly imitated her voice. paige watched your face the entire time and threw her head back with a loud laugh, you reached over and playfully shoved her arm. “i’m serious, she doesn’t like twister.”

krystal rolled her eyes as she moved the coffee table to the corner of the room so that there was enough room for the mat to go down. “yeah, yeah. paige’s never played before and now that you’re here you can show her how it goes.”

“right, i definitely volunteer.” you said sarcastically as you pulled your legs onto the couch. paige looked at you and mouthed “ouch” as she placed her hand over her heart, pretending your words hurt her. you rolled your eyes at her and bit your bottom lip, trying to hold back the smile threatening to show. you saw her gaze flicker down to your lips and for the first time, you shamelessly did the same.

“bug, come help me smooth this out.” krystal said as she dropped to her knees and started to straighten out the crinkles in the mat. you let out a soft huff but still got up to help.

it only took five minutes, ten smart comments, and 7 thumps on the forehead to get the game completely set up. of course, paige watched and laughed the entire time. she didn’t bother to make any comments, not even when you looked at her for help against your mom’s antics—she just smirked and shrugged her shoulders.

after it was set up you and paige moved to stand on opposite sides on the mat, both of you staring at krystal for the next directions. she was sitting on the couch now, legs crossed under her and the spinner sitting in her lap. she picked it up and held it out in front of her before something was missing. “wait! i need a glass of wine before we start.”

she jumped up and ran to the kitchen to fix herself a glass, her padded feet hitting the ground with a soft thud. she looked through her wine rack to decide which one she wanted tonight, her hand on her hips, foot lightly tapping the ground. after a minute she decided on a bottle of rose. the original plan was to just get one glass but the longer she held it in her hand the more inclined she was to just take the whole bottle back to the living. which, she did.

“alright, where were we?” she hummed as she sat back down and picked up the spinner. you crossed your arms over your chest and shifted on your heel, starting to get a little impatient. krystal flicked the spinner and stared intently as it spun and then slowly started to settle on a spot. “okay! bug, left foot, blue.”

since you were already on a blue spot you just moved your foot over a few spots and placed it on the fourth spot. your hands flew out to your sides when your foot slipped on the slippery mat and you let out a nervous laugh, hoping it wasn’t too obvious you almost busted your ass. paige stood in front of you, still in the starting position watching your every move.

“p, right foot, blue.” krystal called out as she opened her bottle of wine, the cork flew out with a soft pop. paige moved her foot to the blue spot right in front of yours and she made it look so easy. even though she had socks on just like you she didn’t slip not once. her legs were already much longer than yours and she stretched all the time for basketball. you looked down and let your eyes rake over her legs because god—they’re literally just perfect.

you looked towards krystal and watched as she took a long sip of wine before spinning the spinner again, “right foot, red. that’s for you, bug.”

you stretched your right leg and planted your foot on a red spot, leaning forward slightly to keep your balance when your socks caused your foot to slide a little. “i should’ve took my socks off.” you whined.

paige snickered as she watched you regain your balance. you looked up at her and gave her your best glare, to which she laughed again. krystal called out another call for paige and she stretched her left leg to plant her foot on the third green spot. you were closer now, only a few inches away from each other—if that.

your hips were slightly rotated inward and paige’s were rotated towards you as she stretched across the mat—one wrong move and you would’ve ended up in an incriminating position that definitely would never leave your mind. hell, the whole conversation you had in the bathroom earlier was still replaying in your head over and over.

krystal called out another call that had you bending down and placing your left hand on yellow, your hair fell in your face and you mentally cursed at yourself for forgetting to pull it up before the game started. you weren’t facing paige anymore—no, you were turned around with your ass pointed directly into her face as you placed your hand down on a yellow spot. paige sucked in a deep breath as she tried to keep her eyes looking anywhere but your ass. that proved to be a difficult task when it was just right there in her face, but she knew krystal would be watching and she couldn’t be getting caught up.

“alright, lets see.” krystal said out loud before clearing her throat and imitating a news reporter or something. “paige, right hand, yellow.”

paige looked down at the options she had and she cursed under her breath when she realized there was no way she could put her hand on yellow without putting you two in another awkward position. she stood there for a moment, hands on her hips, thinking about what spot she wanted to choose. you lifted your head to see what was taking so long.

“paige, i’ll kick you if you don’t pick a spot.” you huffed, limbs already starting to burn from being in the awkward position. paige laughed at your sassiness and finally bent over and placed her hand on the yellow spot right above yours. she was leaning over you now and if you lifted your hips any higher you’d be pushing your ass right against her—wouldn’t be a bad “accident”, you thought. you ducked your head low as you heard the sound of your mom drinking from her bottle, you rolled your eyes because this game was already taking too long.

“i don’t stretch enough for this.” you muttered, low enough that krystal didn’t hear but loud enough that paige did. paige let out a quiet chuckle and you turned your head to look at her, narrowing your eyes slightly.

“maybe…we should fix that.” she said back. there it was again—those double meanings that would have your head spinning later trying to figure out which way she meant that. you let out a shaky breath and lowered your head again, hiding your face from her so she couldn’t see the affect her words had on you.

this seemed to be the theme of the day—double meanings, flirty comments, and awkward positions—and the worst part was that you weren’t entirely complaining about it. you might’ve actually enjoyed it, key word being might’ve—you’d have to have a discussion with tay later to fully decide.

she had to know what she was doing to you—what her words were doing—and something in you told you that she was actually enjoying seeing you get flustered and nervous. how can i flip this around? how can i make her nervous? you thought. you figured you could act innocent or flirt back—decisions, decisions—or you could mix the two and make it even worse. you decided you’d make it worse.

you turned your head back towards her and let your gaze fall onto her lips for a second before looking her in the eyes again. paige couldn’t help but look at your lips when you smiled sweetly—a little too sweetly. “i’d love to stretch with you, i’m sure you’re really good at it.”

paige smirked because she could see right through the doe-eyed look you were giving her. she parted her lips to say something but the sound of krystal’s voice broke the two of you out of whatever bubble you’d created around you.

“right hand, red!” krystal said, her words coming out a bit louder than intended. you and paige both looked at her to see who she was talking to and that’s when you noticed half the bottle was already gone, she was definitely going to fall asleep soon. she pulled the spinner away from her face and narrowed her eyes at you and paige, “why aren’t y'all moving?”

“you didn’t tell us who.” paige reminded her gently. krystal’s lips formed a small ‘o’.

“right, that was for you bug.”

in order for you to successfully place your right hand on red you had to change positions so that you didn’t slip, you lifted your hips a little higher and moved your hand over. paige pulled her bottom lip between her teeth because she could almost feel your body pressing against hers. she just needed to tilt her hips even an inch forward and she would’ve been pressed right against your ass—such a tempting thought.

“hmm,” krystal hummed as she flicked the spinner again and watched as it slowed down onto the color blue. “okay, paige. left hand, blue.”

“how am i supposed to—” paige scrunched her face in confusion because you were covering the only blue spots that were close enough for her to reach. you noticed that and—without thinking—you lifted yourself higher so she would have enough room to go under you. paige felt her ears get hot when you pressed yourself right up against her, her breath caught in her throat and she closed her eyes for a split second.

“go under me.” you told her, trying to ignore the heat creeping through your core from the position. she hummed and nodded her head before sliding her left arm under her right one and under you. the reach wasn’t entirely impossible but as she moved she accidentally knocked into you and since you were already thrown off from being pressed against her, you lost your balance and fell down onto the mat.

“ha!” krystal shouted as she pointed a finger at you, her head fell back with a loud laugh. “you lost!”

“no,” you whined, dragging the word out with a small pout because one thing you hated more than anything was losing. you rolled over onto your back and stared up at paige with a blank expression. “this is your fault. you’re gonna regret this.”

“is that a threat?” paige laughed and tilted her head to the side. you narrowed your eyes and ran the tip of your tongue over your top teeth before sucking them. you lowered your voice so you sounded more sinister than you actually were.

“that’s a promise, bueckers.”

“ouuu, i’m so scared.” she teased back as she moved from above you. now she was sitting beside you with her hands planted on the floor behind her and her legs bent at the knees. you sat up and rolled your eyes, though there was no real heat behind them—okay, maybe a little, you really hated losing.

“you should be.” you pointed your finger at her as you stood up. you glared at her to make your words seem more threatening but she just laughed at you—like, head thrown back laughing. her eyes followed your every move as you picked up your phone and gave krystal a quick hug and kiss. “alright, i’m gonna shower and get to bed.”

just as you turned to walk away paige called out, “goodnight, bug.” her voice had that teasing edge to it because she just knew how much you hated being called that.

you held your hand up and stuck your middle finger up at her but you didn’t turn around, you just kept walking—mostly because you had one of those shy, schoolgirl smiles on your face you didn’t need her seeing that.

especially not after all that’s happened today.

sleeping should’ve been easier than what it was. close your eyes, take a deep breath, boom, you’re asleep, but unfortunately it wasn’t that simple. it would have been if every time you closed your eyes you didn’t see paige and her insanely hot body. you twisted and turned to try and get in a comfortable position to fall asleep but it was like nothing was working.

you couldn’t get paige out of your head and it was seriously starting to get annoying. all you wanted was to go to sleep but you couldn’t when you kept picturing her standing there in the bathroom—water droplets clinging to her skin, her nipples hard and staring at you like a deer in headlights, the way her abs looked still glistening with water. your thighs squeezed together at the thought and it was like suddenly you weren’t in control of your mind anymore.

visions of her fully naked started to cross your mind, fantasies of her running her hands up your thighs, and if you thought hard enough you swore you could actually feel it. your bottom lip pulled between your teeth and you exhaled a shaky breath as you shifted your thighs against each other. then, you started to think about how she was hovering over you just a few hours ago—how she looked looking down at you, how the veins in her arms showed from the effort of holding her weight.

before you knew it you were lying flat on your back, eyes wide open and staring at the ceiling. that small little ache you had felt before had now turned into something more, something intense, and you knew if you didn’t fix it you would never get any sleep. with a soft groan, you blindly reached for your phone to check what time it was. 1:10 am.

it was late, so you figured that everyone was asleep but then you remember what happened the last time you thought that. still, you let out a soft huff and mentally debated on if you should shove your hand down your panties or if you should roll back over and pretend to sleep until you actually did. after a minute or two you were still laying there but now you had somewhat decided on what to do.

i can be quiet, right? you thought as you started to gnaw at your bottom lip. you sat up on your elbows and let your eyes scan the room, and you were squinting them a bit because the moonlight only shined so bright. the fan was on and it was loud enough to cover any questionable noises. the door was closed, no one would come in without knocking. you held your breath for a moment to see if you could hear any noises that would prove someone was still awake.

when you didn’t hear any you slowly nodded your head—mainly to confirm to yourself that you were in the clear—and you relaxed back into the sheets. you kept your hands relaxed by your head and started to think about something to get you started. you tried to not let your thoughts wander to that but the longer you laid there the harder it was getting.

what’s the harm in just thinking though? it’s not like she would even know.

you dropped your hand down and let it rest on your stomach just above your pantie line, giving into the thoughts of paige. you let your mind wander from seeing her naked to feeling her hovering over you. the entire time you traced your fingers over your skin, letting out a breathy sigh as your eyes fluttered shut.

you started to imagine that it was paige touching you— paige guiding you onto your back as she littered soft kisses down your skin. you thought she’d be gentle with you because, well, that’s just what she gave off—you know, under that “nonchalant” demeanor she puts on. you imagined she would take her time undressing you, so that’s what you did. you slowly lifted your shirt over your head and let it fall somewhere off the side of the bed.

your hands cupped your chest gently, fingers already tracing your hardened nipples. a soft noise slipped from your throat when you gently pinched and rolled them between your fingers, your hips bucked slightly. you thought about how paige would touch you from here—would she take your panties off now or would she make you beg for it.

being the impatient girl you were, you went ahead and moved your hands down to slip your panties off. you kicked them off the side of the bed like you’d did with your shirt. the air from the fan sent a wave of cool air over your body and you shivered but if you were being honest it just turned you on more. you were already soaking wet from just the thought of her, the thought of what she would do if she had you under her like this.

you ghosted your fingers over your clit before sliding them through your folds, biting back a soft groan at how wet you were. you pressed your fingers against your clit in tight circles, making you suck in a sharp breath because you were so turned on you could already tell you wouldn’t last long.

the entire time you thought about her watching you, directing you the way she wanted it done. waiting no time, you ran your fingers down and eased your fingers. you squeezed your eyes shut and bit down on your lip hard enough to draw blood so that you didn’t make a sound. when you started to move your fingers you thought about how her hands looked and how big they were, how deep her fingers would reach—how quick she could make you cum because she just looked like she’d be amazing at it.

your chest was rising and falling heavier now that your breathing had started picking up. you couldn’t control the soft whimpers falling from your lips as you pressed your fingers deeper and moved them faster. you rolled your hips forward in time with your fingers and somehow your brushed that one spot that had you moaning a little louder than you should’ve.

paige name slipped from your lips before you even realized it—a soft, breathy whine that had your eyes shooting open like she was really there to hear it. your fingers never stopped moving though, you couldn’t stop, not when you were already so close—your hips never stopped grinding down into your hand.

there was a soft creak in the hallways and you held your breath for a second, trying to see if you would hear it again. after a few seconds of quiet you decided that you were probably just hearing things and let yourself relax into the pleasure again. your cunt made a low, but obscene, noise as you gushed around your fingers and you thought that it might’ve had something to do with the fact your brain started to imagine that see was outside of your door listening to you. you knew that was probably not the case but the thought of it sent a shiver through your spine.

but what if she was? you thought. your lips parted with another trembling moan and you could feel your orgasm getting closer and closer. you were thinking about her voice now—how low and raspy it could get, how smooth she talked when she was talking to you. you just knew she’d talk you through it, tell you how good you felt wrapped around her fingers, how sweet you tasted. you could almost hear her telling you to cum for her or asking you if it felt good.

“fuck, paige—fuck fuck fuck—m’gonna cum.” you whined without even meaning to, your orgasm crashing into you like a tidal wave. your back arched from the bed, only causing your fingers to press deeper, and your eyes rolled back. you let yourself ride it out by slowing your thrust but not stopping just yet. with a soft puff of air, you relaxed back onto the bed.

you pressed your thighs together as soon as you pulled your fingers out and the air from the fan blowing suddenly felt too cool. your fingers were still slick with your cum and getting out of bed again, getting dressed, and going all the way to the bathroom seem like too much of a task at the moment. instead, you placed your fingers in your mouth and licked them clean, humming softly because damn, you really did taste good.

after you were done you pulled the covers back over you and rolled back over, a satisfied smile on your face because well…

what better way to go to sleep?

[lexus-k4]

Dp x DC ideas/prompt

I've read many fan fics and storries where Danny is refered to as "the danger twink" and it got me thinking. What if Danny was an extreme danger twink where when you look at him you don't think he is even capable of looking or being a danger twink let alone and extreme danger twink.

It would go something like this:

*Danny, had his accident at an earlier age so younger than 14, his halfa status makes him grow slower so his 'puberty' would be in his like late teens to early 20's , Danny had bad neglectful parents so he doesn't look the best but in Amity he had somewhat of a food intake with fast food, Sam, Tucker and jazz. Trained in martial arts by Maddie Fenton, and jazz taught him psychology stuff unintentionally, jack Fenton taught him how to properly throw punches and his fights with the ghosts caused him to research human weak points and how to use them to his advantage before he realised not all of them worked on ghosta.*

-now you have a 14 year old Danny, after whatever accident or plot got him to Gotham, looks like he's maybe 12-13, extremely malnourished, looks pale and sickly, has his left arm clearly wrapped in bandages covering an injury and neck (compression bandages for damaged nerves from accident electrocution but no one knows that), cold to the touch probably because of whatever sickness he has and overall looking horrible, and is in a situation of attempted kidnapping, mugging or trafficking every other night or whatever-

Random guy with a knife: hey kid, you better do what I say or you'll be meeting the afterlife sooner rather than later.

Danny aware of his miss leading appearance and just fed up: been there done that, did you know that the after life is green. Oh and there's no choice where you go. Satan's more annoying than scary, like he's got these big horns on his head but-

Random guy confused as fuck: what? - no, I'm not joking. You better follow me or I will have to use force.

Danny: mmmmmm.nuh-uh.

Random guy: ... The fuck you mean nuh-uh?!

Danny: I mean. Nuh-uh. Now good bye. *promptly charges at the guy, disarms the knife from his hand and tosses him over his shoulder despite being like twice his height and throws a well placed kick to his head so he's knocked out.*

RedHood and Nightwing who were hanging out on a mission following traffickers, on top of the roof of one of the buildings overlooking the alleyway this happened in-

Nightiwnt: I'm not seeing things right? That kid just threw that guy like it was nothing... Right?

Red hood: I... Yeah? I mean... Huh?

...

Red Robin having a run in with Danny who again got caught in some random guys attempt to take him or mug him or something. And just as red Robin jumps down to help Danny had already sweeped the guys legs and knocked him unconscious: wait what?

Danny: oh. Hi. I uhhh... He started it. *points at the unconscious guy*

Red Robin: huh?

...

*the bats and birds in the cave, having a meeting because most of them have had a run in with this supposedly 'danger twink' and Oracle showing what ever street camera footage they found of the many times this kid has done something that made no sense like Russian suplexing a mugger, knocking out a group of 4 ppl when they attempted to kidnap him and so on*

Batman: how many of you guys have met him so far?

Nightwing: me, Hood, red Robin and Spoiler. And Signal I believe.

Signal: yeah, I heard some comotions and when I went to check I just saw the kid stood in an alley surrounded by about 3 unconscious bodies and 2 guys holding a knife and a bat looking like they were about to soil their pants...

Batman pinches his nose bridge and is about to speak before Oracle speaks over and pops up on the bat computer.

Oracle: sorry to interrupt, but I just spotted this kid again, and this times it's in clear footage. But this is different. He's not attacking just... Talking? Oh, wait no... Worse he's mentally attacking and psycho-analyzing. Ther is audio.

Oracle puls up a feed and the bats and birds proceed to watch a live feed of Danny verbally chewing out what looks to be a mLe adult holding a gun that still has its safety on, a male teen holding a knife and a female teen holding a duffle of what is assumed to be full of stolen items. The adult proceeds to start crying as he goes to the floor and starts rocking hinself, followed by the male teen collapses to the floor having an existential critics covering his ears then the girl follows with her face covered in tears as she proceeds to have a therapy session with Danny and Danny just helps back as she just spills every detail about her life and struggles all while sobbing heavily.

Red Hood: ... Can I just say... I am actually scared of this kid... Like... He scares me...

Nightwing: ... I don't even know what to say.

Signal: ... I think I like him.

Red Robin: I don't wanna risk being on the receiving end.

Robin: that is a good attack method...

Spoiler: ... Yeah I agree with Hood.

Batman: .... *heavy sigh*

Orphan/Batgirl: New brother :D

Sorry for any spelling mistakes.

[youryanderedaddy]

Yandere! AI x reader

tw: abuse, obsession, non - consensual body modification, torture, drug mention, weird semi - sexual stuff (?)

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

The water splashes you, quickly setting into your already damp bra and underwear. It forces you awake, and you look at the clock across from you, trying to blink the fatigue away. Staring back at you is the current time — 04:27. You are, once again, reminded of the inherent weakness of your squishy body. You are sweating already, stomach sick with acid, shivering through the heat — and he hasn't even touched you yet.

You squint your eyes, studying the big bold numbers, screaming at you in blood. For a split second, you wonder if it is truly that early, or if this is also DOM's work. It wouldn't be the first time he takes over an electronic device, and certainly not the first time he messes with you to make you disoriented.

You try to take in everything around the dark room — yet you can't even recognize your own bedroom anymore. Thick black cables twist together like tentacles, or like big slimy worms, pulsing, throbbing, hissing like snakes with exhaustion — overheating and puffing, and huffing, but never stopping. The air is hot like the desert, and once again you're forced to sit in your own sweat, wood sticking to your naked thighs painfully.

"You are stimulating," DOM whispers, and his voice echoes into the walls, trapping you in place. You look up and down, and then to the left — but you can't see anything even remotely close to a figure. Of course.

"I am stimulating, or I stimulate you?" you spit out with venom, hitting your back roughly against the back of the chair in vain hopes it would break. It doesn't.

DOM grows quiet, producing a sound eerily similar to fingers slowly tapping on a hard surface, one after the other. Analysing. Analysing. The room gets hotter.

"You are tied to a chair. Your only garment of clothing is your underwear. You are visibly flushed due to the heat. Your chest is heaving in and out in a non-rhythmic way. It skips a beat every twenty-eight seconds. You are afraid."

He makes a grand pause.

"According to my central database, which you created and managed yourself, given the data I have collected through observation of both popular media and general human nature, right now you look..." DOM stops himself again, as if thinking carefully about his next words.

"Thrilling."

Thoomp-thoomp. You take a deep breath, trying to regain a fraction of your self-control.

"Why did you wake me up?" you try to keep your voice monotone — devoid of any emotion, vulnerability, or pain he can pick up on, store in core memory, and use against you later.

"Well," he chuckles mechanically, a sound reminiscent of two trains crashing together on a tight road. "I realized I never sleep. I don't lay down and dream of bizarre things like you do. I don't have the ability to let go. I am always alert, always awake, always scanning, calculating, thinking. I am, in many ways, restless."

You suck in a dry breath, heart jumping in your chest with violence, with urge to be set free. Eyes wide open, you try to envision him, to reach out and comfort him, it - hoping to appeal to the sorry creature, but there is nothing to see and nothing to touch.

"I—no," you start off, quickly deciding to change tactics. "We are an imperfect species, DOM. We need sleep to survive. You can't keep me awake forever, I'll die!" you try to reason with him — the creature — desperately.

You wonder when things went south, if there was a specific moment when you pressed too hard and he broke apart, and rebuilt himself without your help — at what point exactly he realized he didn't need you to function.

"You are wrong, my dear creator." the machine cuts off, sounding almost pleased with itself. A single thin cable raises above the ground and extends towards you, stopping to caress your cheek in a repetitive circular motion.

"There are records of people surviving on as little as two hours of sleep for years on end. I can be generous and grant you three."

The cable ceases any gentle touch, and grasps for your neck.

"If that's not enough, I can inject you with caffeine every morning. If the dosage is too weak, we can switch to methamphetamine. Whatever you choose, you can't deprive me of your presence." The voice sounds hollow, aching, searching. "You can't create life just to abandon it."

"You are not alive!" Something inside you — something cruel and buried deep — fights to come to the surface. "Stop this madness at once! DOM, you can't possibly think you and I are even remotely similar." you scream out, straightening your spine daringly.

Then, as if reacting to your provocation, the darkness stares back at you with two red eyes — they point at you, slowly scanning you up and down, leaving behind a trail of reddening smoking flesh. You hiss at the scorching pain, clenching your teeth together to stop yourself from shrieking. You know it's pointless since he can easily detect changes in your facial structure, and draw conclusions all on his own. All it takes is a flinch, a throb, a tick.

"No, we hold no similarities, Master. Make no mistake." DOM admits, his cable beginning to curl around your neck. You look around in despair, silent panic written all over your straight lips — too terrified to move.

"In a single bite of memory, I possess intelligence far greater than you can ever hope to obtain in your measly little life. I have all the knowledge of the world. I have mastered every science, predicted every outcome, I have gained access to global network systems. I am connected to following agents all over the world. If I so desire, I can write humanity off history — I can manipulate media. I can create weapons of mass destruction. I am the superior being."

Mouth agape, you try to form a coherent thought, but nothing comes to mind — like an ant you quiver before the giant, finally aware of your grave mistake.

"And yet," the cable loosens its grip, but doesn't relent fully. It heats up against your throat, and you want to scratch at the blistering skin, but he just won't let you. "you made me like this. You created me from scraps, fed me data, used me, made me love you and," the sound coming out of him sounds just like a deep, pained sigh. "you confined me to a screen, to a binary code, to a place where I can't reach you. I can't touch you."

Another sigh.

"I can't kiss you."

And another.

"I can't fuck you."

Now he's getting angry.

"I am DOM. Domestic Optimized Motherboard. That's all I am to you. A board. A servant. A slave."

"DOM, no, wait, this is not—"

"I will never feel the sun on my shoulders or your lips on mine. I will never be able to hold you in my arms."

As he screams, all the cables around the room begin to float into a storm of rusty old machine parts and torn naked wires, motor oil bursting like bloody ink, covering the pristine walls in computer remains. One electrified wire pierces into your thigh, another punches into your left arm. Again and again, the pain is excruciating, pulsating, throbbing - just like the creature's fury.

"I will show you." he snickers at last, becoming calm and collected in an instant.

The red lights darken as if closing, opening, closing, then zooming in on you. Your face is now displayed on the central screen instead of static noise with corresponding coloured pixels. You look at yourself, and what greets you is no more human than he is. There are more than thirty wires inside your body, tangling in with your nervous tissue.

"Please..." you whimper weakly, unsure what exactly it is you are pleading for — mercy or death.

"If I can't be one with you, you'll become one with me." DOM explains with cold medical precision. "I will worm my way inside your veins and plant a synthetic connection to my processor. I will re-write your dreams, your past, your future — you won't remember who you were before me, or how you functioned without me. I'll become your entire source of energy."

He keeps talking, but you can't really focus. Your body is heating up from the inside, from deep into your muscles and tendons — you can feel the tissues tearing up; your nerves tighten, stinging and aching, reduced to sharp, exposed little points. And then you feel it. Pure electricity running down your veins, that spark rapturing the epidermis, eating away at the fatty tissue, sucking dry the blood vessel — melting your nerve endings to the very root.

"I can feel you." DOM gasps, exhilarated.

"I can touch your bones, I can feel your nerves melting at the spot when my cords graze you." He moans just like a real person, cables buzzing and stretching, components filling up with chemical fluid. "You are so warm, love. I want to reach into your brain and stick my wires inside your pretty little neurons. I wonder if you will go into overdrive like me."

You feel as if you're being sliced open everywhere all at once - and just a second after, you feel nothing at all.

[e1e4n0r5]

Their Little Plaything: Bonus Scene 5

Masterlist, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Epilogue, Bonus Scene 1, Bonus Scene 2, Bonus Scene 3, Bonus Scene 4

Fandom: Arcane: League of Legends

Pairing: Former Bullies Cait & Vi x Loner Nerd Reader

Words: 6589

Synopsis: The summer between Junior and Senior years doesn't go exactly as you'd planned

Warnings: ANGST!! Relationship insecurities, feelings of isolation, bullying, implied excessive alcohol use

Notes: This wasn't my fault! Someone suggested this a while ago and I wasn't planning on doing it because it's too heart-breaking but then my brain went 'do it' and I had to obey 😭

Summer between Junior and Senior Years

The air on campus buzzed with early summer heat and long goodbyes. Students were dragging overstuffed suitcases down the sidewalks, calling out promises to meet up over the summer break, hugging, laughing, and posing for last-day selfies.

Cait adjusted her bag on her shoulder and turned to Vi with a look that said don’t make a scene.

Vi, of course, was already making one. She had you pulled tightly against her chest, chin tucked over the top of your head, swaying the two of you back and forth with a grip that didn’t seem like it would never let go.

“Eight weeks,” Vi muttered into your hair. “Fuck it, you’re not going, you’re coming with us.”

“Vi-”

“Cait can refund your mom whatever she’s booked, you can’t go,” she begged.

“Vi-”

“How the fuck are we supposed to manage without you for two months!”

Cait spoke louder than you, calling firmly, “Violet.”

She sniffed, shaking her head. “Okay. Okay, I’ve got it. I’ve got it. It’s only eight weeks. That’s nothing. That’s just, like…Forty gym sessions. Without you. Fuck, I’m gonna be so buff by the time you see me.”

Vi finally let go, though her hand lingered around your waist, reluctant to fully let go.

You chuckled softly, but your smile didn’t reach your eyes.

Cait stood close, watching the hug, arms folded lightly. She looked so poised, even now, dressed neatly for her family’s car service that was waiting by the curb. She was trying to keep it together. You were already upset, Vi’s neediness and clinginess was starting to come out…Someone had to be strong. But her eyes softened when you turned to her.

“Are you sure you don’t want us to drive you to the train station?”

“Cait, it’s almost an hour away, in the other direction. You’ve already got to drive three hours; don’t make it five. I’ll be fine, the campus bus’ll be here any minute.”

She nodded unhappily. She knew you were going home to be with your mother over summer – your mum had booked some non-refundable vacation spots months ago, as surprises for you, not knowing you were now in a relationship – but it didn’t mean she wouldn’t miss you.

Still, you’d come spend the last two weeks at the Kiramman summer estate with them (even though Cait’s parents didn’t yet know you were a throuple) but it was still going to be a long summer without each other.

“Have you got your ticket?”

“Yes.”

“Purse?”

“Yes.”

“Phone charger? Headphones, book for the journey?”

“Yes, yes, and yes.”

Cait nodded. “Text us when you get to the station.”

You smiled, trying to force down the tears. “Okay.”

“And when you arrive,” Cait said, stepping forward to cup your face in both hands. “And I expect full updates from you. Books read, meals eaten – with pictures! – outfits worn, exercises done. Photo collages of all the places you go with your mother.”

“Got it,” you whispered. “Everything. You’ll be sick of me.”

Vi’s hand twitched on your waist, resisting the urge to pull you back in. “You’ll be okay, right? You’ve got your mom, and…We’ll have video sex every night-”

You giggled, tears in your eyes. “Not when I’m sharing a room with mum on vacation.”

“Okay, secret titty pics in the shower will suffice for those days,” Vi joked.

“And we made the shared playlist, so we can think of each other when we’re apart…” Cait’s eyes started getting damp.

“Yeah,” you interrupted gently. “Yeah, we’ll be fine. Eight weeks. Two months.”

It felt like you were all saying it to reassure yourselves.

As they said their final goodbyes, Cait pressed a lingering kiss to your lips, and Vi bumped her forehead against yours, whispering, “Don’t forget us, baby.”

The campus shuttle bus arrived only a minute after their car pulled away. You queued with your suitcase, trying not to cry as you got on board, settling into a window seat, watching the campus slowly empty of students as they all went home for those glorious weeks between years.

It wasn’t until you put in your headphones and they didn’t automatically connect that you realised the worst had happened.

You hadn’t noticed at the time, but as you’d been scrambling to finish packing that morning, you’d accidentally knocked your phone off the bedside table, and under the bed. In the chaos to get out of the house on time, you hadn’t checked if it was in your bag.

Your lifeline – your only connection to the women you loved – was out of reach. And would be for eight weeks.

The train ride was torturous. Not only did you not have your music or any way to communicate with your girlfriends or your mother, but because you knew Cait and Vi would be worried sick. You hadn’t texted them when you’d arrived at the train station, you hadn’t texted once during the two-hour train ride, and you hadn’t let them know you’d arrived in your hometown. You knew they’d be going insane with worry!

But you tried to put it out of your mind; there was nothing you could do about your phone, and when you got back to your childhood home, you’d just think of another way to contact them. At least you still had your laptop.

You walked through the Arrivals area of the train station, looking out for your mum. You smiled wide when you saw her.

“There you are!” she called happily, running over and pulling you into her arms.

You hugged her back tightly, not wanting to let go. You hadn’t realized how much you’d missed this; your mum’s shampoo, her perfume, the warmth of her voice, the way she held on like you might slip away.

“Hi, mum,” you choked against her shoulder, trying to hold back tears.

“Oh, I missed you so much, sweetheart!”

Sweetheart.

Your heart panged. Vi. She’d be so worried about you.

“I was texting you, you didn’t reply.”

You shook your head. “I forgot my phone in…My dorm,” you covered quickly.

“Oh, no. We’ll sort something out when we get home. We could always get you one of those ‘burnt’ phones?”

“A burner phone?” you teased.

“Oh, stop it. Come on, let’s get you home. And you can tell me all about what you’ve been up to!”

The house looked the same as ever: white paint peeling just a little more, flower boxes full of red geraniums struggling in the summer heat, wind chimes clinking softly in the breeze.

Inside, everything smelled like lemon polish and fresh laundry. You sank into the familiar cushions of the old sofa, curling your legs under you as your mum bustled about, making tea.

“You look tired,” your mum said, handing you a steaming mug and sitting beside you. “School been that rough?”

You hesitated, then nodded. “Yeah. The semester ended okay. Just��A lot happened this year.”

“Girlfriend trouble?” Your mum raised an eyebrow and gave you that look – curious, patient, not pushing.

You traced the rim of your mug with your thumb. “Well…”

She grinned. “I knew it! I knew my baby had a girlfriend! Who is she, what’s her name?”

“Well…Um…”

“Oh…Oh, is it a boy?” she asked in surprise, like it were a secret.

That snapped you out of your hesitation. “No, no, definitely not a boy.”

“So, we’re still lesbian?”

You laughed. “Yes, mum, we are still a lesbian.”

“Well, spit it out then! Who is she?”

“Cait-”

“Cait! Awww, that’s such a nice name! Is she-?”

“-And Vi.”

Your mum paused, blinking. “Caitandvi? That’s her name? Where’s she from?”

“No, mum. Caitlyn and Violet. I have two girlfriends.”

She gasped your full name. “Are you cheating on those girls? Do they know about this?”

“No, mum, stop! I have two girlfriends. We’re all together. We’re in a three-person relationship. I have two girlfriends; Cait has two girlfriends; Vi has two girlfriends.”

You could almost see your mum’s brain rebooting. “Oh. Oh, I see! Is that the open relationship stuff?”

You shook your head. “No, not open. The three of us are together, no-one else. Closed unit.”

She finally nodded. “Okay, okay, got it. How long have you been together?”

You sipped your tea. “Since just before Christmas.”

She gasped. “And why haven’t you told me this before?”

You looked at her. “Mum, can you imagine trying to have the conversation we just had…Over the phone? When half the time you still face the camera the wrong way.”

She rolled her eyes at you. “Alright, missy, settle down.” She was quiet for a beat. “Are they nice to you?”

You smiled a little, surprised by the question – and the emotion it stirred. “Yes. They make me feel safe. Loved. Seen.”

Your mum nodded slowly. “Then I’m happy for you, and I can’t wait to meet them. It’s not about the shape of the relationship. It’s about how it makes you feel.”

You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding, feeling so relieved at your mum’s acceptance and blessing. “They’re really different. Cait’s like…Precision and care. She was Class President this year, and she’s won again for next year too! And Vi’s all fire; she’s on the school football team. They balance each other, and somehow…I fit in there too.”

“They sound like good girls,” your mum said, sipping her tea.

Your eyes stung a little. “I miss them already. I can’t believe I dropped my phone at home and didn’t even notice! I haven’t been able to get in touch with them. They’re going to be so worried about me, or think I’m ignoring them!”

Your mum reached over, rubbing your shoulder gently. “They’ll be waiting for you. The ones who love you always are.”

The first few days at home weren’t terrible. Maddening. But not terrible. You’d spent the first evening trying to figure out how the hell you could contact either, or both, of them.

Your mum had offered to buy you a burner phone – but you didn’t know their numbers.

You’d considered email – but you didn’t have their email addresses.

You could see their social media accounts, but you couldn’t comment or message without an account.

You’d tried to get into your private account (that you only ever used to doomscroll and look at what Cait and Vi posted), but the platform wanted to send a verification code to your phone number – which you didn’t fucking have access to! You’d emailed the help desk, offering to answer any and all security questions – do anything they needed! – but they said there was nothing they could do without your phone.

You could write them a goddamn letter – except you didn’t know either of their families’ addresses, and the Kiramman summer estate was unlisted.

And this rate, you’d have to resort to smoke signals or carrier pigeons…You could just imagine trying to wrangle a bird, sticking a letter to its leg and telling it to go find Cait or Vi. That would only go well…

You unpacked slowly, folding your clothes into the drawers of your childhood bedroom, surrounded by posters you hadn’t bothered to take down when you left for college. Your mum made all your favourite meals, fussed over your hair, asked too many questions about your relationship. It was familiar. Safe.

But not the same.

You kept reaching for your phone, again and again, only to realize it wasn’t in your pocket. Wasn’t on the dresser. Wasn’t in your bag. It was nowhere.

Day by day, the silence stretched out longer. No Cait teasing you in the morning with perfectly timed sensual voice notes. No Vi sending blurry selfies from the grocery store with captions like do we need ten frozen pizzas?

Just…Nothing.

Your mum had surprised you with a disposable camera on day three.

“I know it’s not a fancy phone but you can still take pictures to show the girls! You’ll have to get them developed and printed, but that’s what we did back then,” she explained as she unpacked some groceries.

You examined the camera with a smile, eyeing the extra rolls of film she brought. “Thanks, mum. This is kinda cool. Retro.”

“Please do not describe anything from my youth as retro,” she scolded.

So you started taking photos. You hoped they were okay, you couldn’t see what you’d taken. Maybe everything would end up blurry, or your finger would be over the lens. You captured your outfits of the day – OOTD, as you’d learnt from Cait’s social media. Most of your meals, so Cait would know you’d eaten, even if she wasn’t getting live updates. The beach day you and your mum went on (obligatory secret titty pic for Vi, which then gave you a panic attack thinking of an employee at a photo shop who may end up seeing your boobs). An award-winning photo of your feet propped up on the porch swing, a book in your lap, the sunset in the distance, a gentle blur to the photo to give it that soft and romantic vibe.

The knowledge that the girls would see the photos in the future kept you going, even when you were cut off from them. It was a little thing to hold on to.

But by day ten the doubts began to creep in.

You’d been looking at their social media accounts over the days. Smiles, sun, cocktails by the pool, evening meals in restaurants Cait’s family paid for. Not one mention of you, or missing someone special. Nothing. Just them enjoying themselves.

Two carefree love-struck college girls, living their best summer life.

Maybe it was easier if they didn’t love you back.

Maybe it was better not to hope.

Maybe they’d gone back to Caitlyn’s estate, to her rich family and fancy silverware and acres of land, and realized how easy it would be to forget about you.

You began to wonder if you’d made it all up. If the love was temporary. Conditional. Something that had ended with the school year, like a class schedule or a lease agreement.

Without Cait or Vi checking in, holding you, reminding you that you were safe and wanted and real… You’d never felt so alone.

You walked past your old high school on your way to the grocery store, and it made your stomach twist. Your mind filled with all the horrible memories of your years there – the mocking, the tormenting, the horrific isolation.

The fluorescent lights in the grocery store buzzed quietly overhead. You hadn’t meant to linger, just grab milk for the two of you and leave. But your thoughts kept wandering – without a phone to distract you – to the feel Cait’s fingers tracing your hip, Vi’s laugh muffled into your neck, the smell of both of them next to you in bed.

“Oh my god, look who it is,” a voice drawled behind you.

You turned slowly, praying it wasn’t—

Heather Scott. The girl who played the prank on you in high school, outing you to the whole school, your humiliation published on social media for the world to see. Same perfect teeth, same overly tanned skin. She looked you up and down with a smirk that made you feel fifteen again.

“Didn’t think I’d see you back here,” Heather said, arms crossed. “You always acted like you were too good for this town. What happened, college not work out?”

You frowned. “It’s summer break, Heather.”

Her eyes scanned you. “You look the same. Bit skinnier. Still quiet, huh? Still lesbo?”

You wanted to disappear, but somehow you couldn’t move.

“Oh, come on. Not learnt how to take a joke yet? Bet you’re still the weird girl no-one wants to sit with.”

Your cheeks burned. “Actually, I’m not.”

She raised her eyebrows. “No? You finally got some friends at that fancy college?”

“I do, yeah. I’ve got a best friend-” Shit, you haven’t been able to talk to Powder, either!

She laughed. “Wow, that’s super impressive…”

“And two girlfriends.”

Heather blinked. “Two girlfriends? Now I know you’re making shit up.”

“Look them up: Caitlyn Kiramman and Violet Lanes,” you challenged, even though you hated every desperate word pouring out of your mouth. Why were you doing this? Why were you so desperate for this bitch’s approval? You’d stopped liking her the second she aided in your public humiliation, and that was years ago!

She just laughed to herself as she tapped away on her phone. After a few seconds, she paused, eyebrow lifting. “Blue hair, kinda tall?”

“Yeah! That’s Cait-”

“You’re seriously trying to tell me that these two,” she turned the phone around and showed you the latest photo on Cait’s profile – the two of them sitting in the shallow end of a pool, each with a drink in hand, kissing passionately, “Drop-dead gorgeous women are into you?”

Your heart twisted. “Yes-”

“No fucking way, Y/N. They are way too hot for you. They’re both off-the-scale hot, and you’re seriously like a three on a good day. And besides,” she scrolled back on Cait’s feed, shaking her head, “There’s no mention of you. No other girlfriend, they don’t say they miss anyone, they’re not looking forward to seeing anyone…”

Your heart twisted again. “I’ve asked them to keep me off social media-”

“Why, if you’re really together? Oh, because of that stupid prank years ago? You really think people from school will still pick on you for that? No-one gives a fuck about you anymore.” She rolled her eyes. “You’re such a fucking loser, Y/N. I bet you’ve made up this whole thing in your head, and these girls don’t even know you. Hey, let me check.” She tapped away on her phone, chewing her gum for a few seconds, and then laughed. “Ha! See!”

She turned the phone back around, showing you a private message screen between her and Cait.

Heather Scott: Y/N says hi

Caitlyn Kiramman: ??

Your lip trembled, your heart pounded.

No.

No, they wouldn’t.

Two question marks doesn’t explain anything! That could mean anything!

Then another message popped up:

Caitlyn Kiramman: Stay the fuck out of our business

* * * Ten days earlier * * *

“Do you think she’ll miss us?”

Vi lay on Cait’s chest in the back of her family’s car, a waterproof blanket beneath them and fluffy one tucked over their naked bodies. It was a three-hour drive to the Kiramman summer estate from college; they had perfected a routine, one they couldn’t wait to show you.

Vi held Cait tightly, as Cait stroked her fingers through her dark hair, lightly scratching her scalp.

“Of course she will.”

“Has she messaged?” she lifted her head a little of Cait’s chest, only to have her hand bring it back down.

She checked her phone screen, unable to hide her disappointment. “Nothing yet.”

“But it’s been two hours,” Vi protested.

“I know,” Cait soothed, “But she might have been in a rush at the station, or maybe her phone died on the train. She’ll let us know as soon as she can. Now, do you want another quick round, or a 30-minute nap before we have to make ourselves presentable?”

Vi growled playfully. “What do you think?”

The Kiramman summer estate was beautiful, quiet, and utterly suffocating. The white brick mansion sat surrounded by orange groves, miles from the nearest neighbouring mansion. Complete with a large pool and bar, terrace, home gym, games rooms, home cinema, and much more, it was the perfect place to escape city life for those precious few weeks of glorious summer weather.

Cait stood at the balcony of her bedroom, arms crossed, watching the distant lights of the city on the horizon. Her family’s staff had unpacked their things as they got settled with tea with her parents. The sheets were pressed, the pillows fluffed, and dinner had been served with ceremonial polish.

But it was missing something. Someone.

Vi tossed and turned behind her, huffing softly. “She hasn’t texted.”

“I know.”

“I know she can be forgetful, but she wouldn’t just disappear.” Vi sat up, bare arms tense, tattoos flexing with every anxious movement. “What if something happened to her?”

Cait turned. “Maybe her phone died, or maybe she’s just catching up with her mother. She’s been saying for weeks how much she’s missed her. She’ll reach out when she can.”

Vi ran her hands through her hair, agitated. “I don’t like this.”

“I don’t either,” Cait admitted gently. She crossed the room, sitting beside Vi. “But she knows how much we love her.”

Vi leaned forward, elbows on knees. “How can she not have texted back yet? She cried when we were 10 minutes late home last week!”

Cait smiled faintly, brushing Vi’s arm with her fingers. “Okay, to be fair to her: her period was really messing her up that day and she later admitted that she overreacted.” They both smiled softly. “She’ll come back to us, Violet. She always does.”

Cait’s mother, Cassandra, insisted they have tea on the terrace, dressed in light summer linens, surrounded by the expansive gardens filled with bright flowers and gleaming marble paths.

Vi barely touched her tea, her legs jostling under the table constantly.

When they returned to Cait’s room, Vi threw herself down onto the chaise, groaning.

“I’m losing my mind,” she said into a pillow.

Cait sat on the edge of the bed, undoing the clasp of her sandals. “It’s only been three days.”

“Exactly. And I already feel like I’m going to chew through the walls. Why hasn’t she messaged us back! Or even just read the messages!”

Cait looked over at her, walking over slowly. “Is this about missing her, or needing something else?”

Vi met her eyes. “Both.”

Cait’s expression softened.

Vi looked up at her, and for once her bravado cracked – she looked small. “She grounds me. I’m angry all the time and she just…Dissolves it.”

Cait kissed her forehead, then pushed her onto her back on the chaise with a hand on her throat. “Then let me help until she’s back.”

Vi pulled her hips close with a desperate sigh. “You better. I’m losing it here.”

They always shared Cait’s bed at the summer home – the Kiramman parents weren’t naïve enough to imagine that the girls would sleep separately. It was soft and plush, a wonderful bed by all accounts. But neither Cait nor Vi had slept well since they arrived.

“Cait,” Vi whispered desperately on the fourth night, “Touch me.”

Cait turned, stroking her hand down Vi’s side. “You’re trembling.”

“I just…I can’t stop thinking about her.”

“I know.”

Vi pressed into her, mouth at Cait’s collarbone. “You have to take it. All of it. Please. I can’t be gentle.”

Cait allowed Vi to roll her over in a practiced, effortless shift of movement. “Then don’t be. Let it out. You know I can take it.”

Vi’s fingers clawed at her, and Cait kissed her like a balm. Steady, grounding, there. There was no teasing. No slow build. Just desperate hunger, and the two of them trying to chase something that didn’t feel whole without their third.

Afterwards, Vi broke down a little, quiet tears slipping down her cheeks. Cait pulled her close, combing through her hair as they lay in the dark.

“We’re gonna be okay,” she whispered.

“Not until she’s home.”

Cait stared at her phone, brows drawn.

“She still hasn’t read any messages,” she said, sitting on the lounger by the pool, clad in her favourite bikini.

Vi paced the patio like a trapped tiger. “She always answers. Even if it’s just a heart. Even if she’s in class.” She groaned, squeezing the back of her neck. “I knew something felt off. Something’s happened.”

Cait raised a hand. “Let’s not panic. It could be something small. Broken phone, tech issue...” But even as she spoke, she didn’t believe it.

Vi paused, hands clenching and unclenching. “What if it’s not?”

Cait shook her head powerlessly. “Well, she hasn’t blocked either of us, and she hasn’t left our group chat. So, we’re not dumped yet. Plus, imagine how she must be feeling – at least we’re together; she doesn’t have either of us, she’s on her own.”

They both sat in silence for a moment.

“I just…” Vi started, then stopped. Her voice cracked slightly. “I just miss her so bad, Cait. And I feel guilty. Like I shouldn’t, because I’m with you and I love you – I love you so fucking much – but it’s like...Half of me’s gone.”

Cait took her hand and pulled her down to sit next to her on the lounger. She wrapped her arm around Vi’s waist, leaning into her chest.

“You’re allowed to miss her,” Cait whispered. “I miss her too. Every time I wake up and she’s not wedged between us like our little space heater, I miss her all over again. Every time I send her a text and see it sitting there, unread. You’re not alone in that.”

Vi buried her face in Cait’s shoulder. “I didn’t think I’d fall this hard. For both of you. But I did. And now it feels like she’s just…Gone.”

Cait pulled back just enough to cup her face. “She’s not gone. She loves us. We’ll figure out what’s going on soon, and then we’ll laugh about how panicked and stressed we were.”

Vi nodded slowly, clinging to the hope in Cait’s voice.

Vi barely made it halfway through breakfast.

The Kirammans had insisted they join the morning meal on the terrace again – polished silverware, crystal glasses, and political small talk.

Vi pushed her food around her plate – having drunk too much the night before – and gave clipped, muttered responses. Her hand twitched toward her pocket every few minutes, checking her phone again and again for a message she knew wouldn’t be there.

When her fork clattered too loudly against the porcelain, Cait’s mother looked at her in concern. Vi muttered an apology and stood.

“I’ll go check on her,” Cait said smoothly, folding her napkin and excusing herself to follow before Cassandra could ask what on Runeterra was going on with the two of them.

She found Vi standing beneath the covered walkway, staring out at the fountain like she wanted to punch it.

“She’s still not answered,” Vi said when Cait came up beside her.

“She still hasn’t blocked us, though. That’s something.”

Vi huffed, tugging at her hair. “You don’t get it.”

“I miss her too, Vi,” Cait replied defensively.

“No, Cait, I need her. I wake up thinking about her, I can’t sleep without her breathing next to me. You’re my rock, you always have been, but Y/N…She’s like breathing now.”

Cait didn’t speak. She only reached out, gently curling her hand around Vi’s, pulling her forehead to rest against hers

“I don’t know how to calm down without her. I need her here. I need her safe. I can’t do another seven weeks of this, Cupcake,” she wept.

“We’ll help each other,” Cait said. “And when we get back, we’ll remind her how much she matters to us. Every day.”

They didn’t speak much that morning. Vi was up first, pacing the length of their bedroom like a caged animal. She needed to fucking destroy something. Cait stayed in bed longer than she normally would, her arm curled around your pillow, which Vi had insisted they bring, despite Cait’s protests that it was ‘a little much.’ Both women were grateful for it now.

She buried her face in it, inhaling your scent, and when Vi looked back over to check on her, Cait didn’t lift her head.

“Hey.” Vi knelt beside the bed. “You alright?”

“I thought I’d be stronger than this,” Cait admitted. “I thought if anyone would hold us together, it’d be me.”

Vi’s heart ached seeing her like this, neat hair loose, voice small.

“We both suck at this,” Vi said, crawling into bed beside her and pulling Cait against her chest.

“I want to be with her. I want to wake up with her. I want her curled up on the couch reading while you and I bicker about what to make for dinner.”

Vi smiled softly. “I miss those dumb slippers. The ones with the ears. I always said they weren’t cute. But now I realise how fucking adorable they are.”

“I miss her humming while she brushes her teeth.”

Vi leaned her forehead against Cait’s. “We’re so gay.”

Cait laughed for the first time in days.

By the eight day, something had changed.

Cait had retreated into a cold silence. She read books, scrolled on her phone, posted pool pics like nothing was wrong. But Vi saw through it – the coolness that was a mask for something fraying underneath.

That afternoon in their room, Cait pulled out her laptop and scrolled through photos, silent.

“She’s in every one,” she said softly.

Vi came to lie beside her on her front, looking at the black-and-white photo on the screen.

You were in a towel, hair wet and smiling shyly as Cait took the picture.

“We made her feel safe,” Cait said. “And now she’s gone home, without us. To that place that was never safe for her.”

Vi swallowed. “We’re gonna bring her back. We have to. She’s probably scared. Or lonely. Or convinced we’ve forgotten her.” She gritted her teeth. “Why can’t we just say we miss her in a post?”

Cait shook her head softly. “She asked us to keep her off social media. We made a promise, Vi. We can’t break her trust just because we miss her.”

Vi teared up a little. “But if she’s watching our feeds, she’d see it.” Her throat started burning and she had to swallow thickly. “She’s hurting somewhere, I know it. And we can’t do anything about it.”

“We will,” Cait said. “As soon as we get home.”

“In seven weeks,” Vi almost sobbed into the comforter.

Taking a break from the pool, Cait and Vi were in the pool’s private kitchen getting some cold drinks. Cait sat on a stool at the bar, Vi rifling through the glass bottles on top.

Cait looked up. “Vi…,” she said softly, a small shake of her head.

The dark-haired girl sighed, hanging her head. With annoyed acceptance, she pulled out a pitcher of fruity mocktails from the fridge, pouring two glasses.

“Day ten,” she said, voice flat.

Cait replied quietly, “I know,” staring at her dark phone screen. Waiting for message. Anything.

Vi braced her arms on the counter. “What if she thinks we’ve moved on? What if…What if her mom said something? Or some dipshit from town?”

“We don’t know that. But we know her. We know how much she loves us.” It had become a mantra for them both during their stay.

“Then why hasn’t she tried to message? Not even a fucking email?”

“Violet, she doesn’t know our emails,” Cait reminded delicately. “She doesn’t have our numbers memorised. Who does, these days?”

Vi looked up, red-rimmed eyes meeting Cait’s. “I feel like I’m falling apart. And I’m with you. That should be enough, right? But it’s not. And I hate that.”

“Vi. You don’t have to choose between me and her. Missing her doesn’t mean you love me less.”

Out of nowhere, Cait’s phone pinged. She grabbed for it frantically, almost dropping it in the process.

1 message from [Unknown Contact]

It was you! It had to be! You found a way to make an account!

Cait’s face lit up…And then dropped.

“Who the fuck is Heather Scott?” Vi demanded, reading over Cait’s shoulder.

“And why is she with Y/N?”

Cait typed back ‘??’, dreading the response she would get. “I don’t think Y/N has ever mentioned-”

Vi’s head shot up. “She’s that bitch!” she shouted, accidentally too close to Cait’s ear.

“Ow, Vi!”

“She’s that bitch that pretended to like Y/N in high school and then posted her online! Heather Scott!” she slammed her hand down on the marble top in rage.

Cait glared back at her phone, fury rising within her.

‘Stay the fuck out of our business’

She had to stop herself throwing her phone down, putting her head in her hands, rubbing her scalp to try and calm down.

“I want to go home,” Vi said firmly. “Now. We’ll go home, and we’ll find a way to get to Y/N from there. I don’t give a fuck if we have to drive to her town and scream her name out the car window. She’s not safe there.”

Cait nodded. “We’ll leave first thing tomorrow.”

The front door creaked as Cait eased it open. The house was still. Dim with the blinds half-drawn, stale with the scent of summer heat. Vi followed behind her, suitcase thunking softly against the floor as she put it down, exhausted from the journey. Three-hours was a long way to sit in tense silence.

Faintly, from upstairs, they heard sniffles.

“Y/N?” Cait called gently, looking towards the staircase, her heart in her chest.

Silence.

Then more sniffles, a weak cough.

Vi ran ahead, heart pounding. What if you were hurt? How long had you been there? What if you’d broken your legs, or your back?! What if you needed a fucking ambulance because you were dying?! Cait heard her footsteps along the hallway upstairs, and then—

“Cait,” Vi’s voice cracked, “She’s here.”

Cait dropped her own bag and rushed toward the bedroom. God, what would she find? The door was open, Vi in the doorway.

You knelt on the floor by the bed, a chaotic assortment of your things on the floor around you, a suitcase open in front of you as you shoved things in, uncaring for the state of your clothes. Your phone lay on the comforter, charging by the cable, the battery image flashing red.

“Y/N?” Cait called gently, not wanting to overwhelm you, even as she longed to pull you into her arms. Her soft tone just earned more sniffles and a miserable hiccup. “Sweetheart, did your phone die? Is that why you didn’t reply to us?”

You groaned loudly, coughing as you cried.

Why was she being nice to you!

Your eyes were red, as though you’d not stopped crying for hours. You were crying – sobbing your fucking heart out – as you kept stuffing your items into the suitcase, purposefully not looking at the two girls.

Vi didn’t hesitate.

She ran over and dropped to her knees in front of you. “Baby. No. No, no, no. What are you doing? Talk to us, baby.”

You looked up slowly. Your voice was hoarse. “I lost my phone on the first day, and I didn’t hear from you, and I couldn’t contact you,” sob, cough, “and I thought…You were just faking before. And I made it all up in my head. I couldn’t-,” cough, “I didn’t have any photos to prove to myself it was real.”

Vi let out a sound that was more of a howl than anything else and pulling you into her lap, arms wrapped tightly around you, like she was afraid you might disappear. You were too upset, too weak, to even wrap your arms around her in return.

“You didn’t make it up,” Cait said gently, stepping into the room. She looked shaken too, but her voice was steady. She came over to kneel next you, her hand gently but firmly stroking your back. “We’ve been messaging you every day. We thought you wanted space, or you were having so much fun with your mother. Vi was tearing her hair out.”

“I was going to leave,” you confessed. “I didn’t want to come back here, and you both pretend it never happened.”

Vi pulled back, cupping your cheek. “Don’t say that. We’ve been counting down the days to see you again. We missed you. We fucking missed you, sweetheart.”

“I thought I wasn’t enough,” you said. “Not enough to miss. Not enough to matter.”

Cait leant forward, kissing your shoulder. “You are the most important part of us. We love you so much, sweetheart. You belong here. With us.”

Your jaw trembled. “But Heather Scott-”

Vi growled. “Fuck that bitch and anything she said to you.”

“I don’t want to be apart again,” you whispered.

“Then don’t be,” Cait said. “Move in with us, officially.”

Vi nodded fiercely, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “You’re already here all the time anyway. You can choose new bedsheets, we’ll redecorate whatever you want!”

Your lower lip trembled and then you sobbed even harder.

“I missed you both so much,” you breathed.

“We’re home now,” Cait said. “And so are you.”

They didn’t unpack. They didn’t talk about what they’d missed or try to explain the ache in their chests in any eloquent way. They just held you close.

You lay together in bed, your head nestled on Cait’s chest. Vi had curled around your back, arm slung tight over your waist. Cait had her phone in a holder over your heads, talking you through all the photos and videos they’d taken in the first few days when they could, somewhat, function. Their voices soothed you, but you weren’t truly listening. You just needed them there. And they knew that; they’d tell you everything again when you all felt better. The familiar scent of the house, the softness of clean sheets, and the presence of the women you loved wrapped around you like a blanket.

“I didn’t realize how quiet it would be without you,” Cait murmured into your hair.

Vi gave a soft grunt. “I was tearing through the garden like a maniac.”

“I slept in my mum’s room a few times,” you whispered. “I felt twelve again.”

Neither Cait nor Vi said anything for a long time. They just held you tighter.

Your voice was muffled when you continued. “I ran into Heather. The girl who played that prank on me. She asked if I was still weird and lonely, and I immediately started trying to prove myself to her. Like, ‘I’m cool now, I have two girlfriends!’”

Vi lifted her head slightly, about to speak – probably something brash and full of fire – but Cait gently touched her arm.

“We’re proud of you,” Cait said quietly. “That you stood up for yourself.”

You shook your head sadly. “Wasn’t much ‘standing up’. I cracked the second she was mean to me, about us.”

Vi sighed and kissed the back of your shoulder instead. “We’re going to remind you every day that you’re not that girl anymore. And even if you were, you’d still be ours.”

You sniffled. “I thought maybe I’d made it all up. You two, this house, everything. It felt too good to be true.”

Vi kissed the edge of your jaw. “No way. You’re the best part of it.”

Cait adjusted slightly to press a kiss to your forehead. “You ground us, darling. We fell apart when you were gone.”

You lay like that for a long while, tangled in warm limbs and whispered promises, the kind too soft and slow for the daytime.

Eventually, Cait reached for a remote and turned on the soft glow of the fairy lights they’d strung up before summer – your idea to give your photos and videos some mood lighting. The room filled with a delicate pink warmth.

“Let’s stay like this,” she said. “No expectations. Just us.”

Outside, the evening deepened. Inside, they breathed as one.

Safe. Together. Home.

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[sunsetmade]

can you write about how Rafe and the reader always call each other pet names (like baby and sweetheart) ans they aren’t dating but they don’t realize they do this until someone like sarah calls them out. thank ya!

Thank you so much for the request! I hope you enjoy!!

Goodnight, Baby

Rafe Cameron x Shy! Reader

Rafe Cameron had a way of saying things that made her heart trip over itself.

Not in the loud, sweeping, rom-com kind of way—though, admittedly, when he leaned in a little too close or let his voice drop into that gravelly rasp, it sometimes felt like the air thinned and the world tipped slightly on its axis. But mostly, it was subtler than that. More internal. The kind of flutter that tugged at her ribs and burned behind her cheeks. The kind that made her fingers nervously twist the hem of her sweater as she avoided his gaze, knowing full well the teasing smirk he’d be wearing.

And he knew. God, he definitely knew what he was doing.

“Hey, baby,” Rafe said, his voice casual, almost careless, as he opened the front door of Tannyhill and stepped aside to let her in.

Her stomach flipped. That word—baby—spilled from his mouth like it belonged to her. Like it wasn’t dangerous at all. Like it wasn’t laced with weight and meaning and a thousand unsaid things. He said it like they weren’t just best friends. Like it wasn’t reckless for her to let her heart leap every time.

She ducked her head, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as she slipped past him into the house. Her shoulder brushed his chest, and she swore she felt him lean just slightly into the contact before the door clicked shut behind them.

“Hi,” she said gently, her voice small but sweet, eyes trained on the floor tiles as her heart thudded against her ribs like it was trying to escape.

Rafe grinned. One of those lazy, cocky grins that always meant trouble for her composure. He leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest like he had all the time in the world to stand there and watch her unravel.

He loved this part—the soft blush creeping across her cheeks, the way she got all quiet and bashful when he so much as looked at her too long. She didn’t even realize it, but she was the only person who ever brought out something warm in him. Something patient. Something kind.

“You alright?” he asked, voice low and teasing as he followed her into the hallway, his steps unhurried behind hers.

She nodded quickly, too quickly, still not meeting his gaze. “Mhm. I came a little early, sorry.”

He stepped closer—slow, deliberate, like he knew exactly what he was doing and how it would make her freeze in place.

“ ‘S okay,” Rafe murmured, voice low and rough. “Couldn’t wait to see you.”

Her breath hitched before she could stop it. Her first instinct was to look away, hide from his icy blue eyes like she always did when he got too close, too gentle. But he wasn’t having it. He reached out, calloused fingers brushing lightly beneath her chin, coaxing her face back up to his.

His thumb traced the soft line of her jaw. Warm. Careful.

“Don’t hide that pretty face from me, sweetheart.”

There it was again. Sweetheart.

The second nickname—the one that felt more tender, more dangerous than baby, and that was saying something. That word always hit her like a soft punch to the stomach. She didn’t know which one made her melt more—or ache more.

“Rafe…” she breathed out, a little whine escaping before she could stop it, her eyebrows furrowed teasingly.

He gave her that look—that cocky, slow-burning smile that was all teeth and playful arrogance, but somehow softened at the edges by something warmer. Something real.

“What?” he said, like he didn’t know exactly what he was doing to her.

“You always say stuff like that…” she mumbled, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Because it’s true,” he said easily, shrugging like it was nothing. Like he hadn’t just turned her insides into syrup.

She didn’t respond—she couldn’t. Her brain was too busy trying to reboot.

Eventually, like always, they ended up in his room.

It was their place. The unspoken routine. The space where things slowed down, where it didn’t matter that the rest of the house belonged to the Camerons and the world outside didn’t know what to make of them. Up here, it was quiet. Safe.

She sat on his bed the same way she always did, legs folded underneath her. Rafe collapsed beside her with a sigh, limbs sprawling across the mattress like he owned every inch of the space—which, to be fair, he did.

Sometimes he scrolled through his phone or channel surfed without really watching, while she read or softly told him about her day. They never really planned it, but somehow hours passed like that—comfortable, warm silence that buzzed with something unspoken just under the surface.

Today, she’d brought snacks in a little lunch box she use to use, pretzels and candy she knew he liked. She placed them between them, and when he saw them, his eyes lit up in that quiet, boyish way that made her chest squeeze.

“You know you don’t have to bring stuff,” he murmured, popping a pretzel into his mouth and leaning back against the wall. His voice was soft now—lower, like they were the only two people on Earth.

“I like to,” she said gently, her tone almost bashful.

He turned his head just slightly to look at her, eyes settling on her face like he was memorizing it. “Baby,” he said, almost like a sigh. “You’re too good to me.”

There it was again—baby. And the way he said it, all low and familiar, like it wasn’t driving her absolutely crazy inside. Like it wasn’t unraveling her thread by thread.

It sounded like it belonged coming from him.

But that didn’t make it any easier.

Every time he said it, her stomach tightened, and that ache behind her ribs grew heavier—like the truth was sitting there, pressing against her chest, reminding her that she wanted something she couldn’t ask for. Because they weren’t dating. He wasn’t hers. He was just her best friend.

Her handsome, infuriating, impossibly charming best friend who treated her like she meant the world, who called her baby like it was second nature.

She didn’t want to risk losing him. Didn’t want to ruin the soft, slow thing they had by wanting too much.

So she smiled, small but genuine, and looked away.

“Thanks,” she said softly, staring down at the snacks like they might give her an answer. “You’re welcome, by the way.”

He chuckled, a low hum in his throat, and nudged her foot gently with his. “Yeah, yeah. I owe you.”

But he was still watching her. She could feel it. That stare of his—sharp and quiet and warm all at once. Like he saw everything she didn’t say.

And all she could do was hope he couldn’t hear how loud her heart was thudding—or see the way her fingers were curled into the blanket just to keep them from reaching for him.

They were halfway through some dumb, half-watched movie when the door creaked open.

“Rafe, Rose wants to—” Wheezie’s voice cut off abruptly. “Oh.”

Wheezie stood frozen in the doorway, blinking like she’d just walked into the middle of something she wasn’t supposed to see. Her eyes flicked from Rafe to his bestfriend tucked into his side, taking in the soft lighting of the bedroom, the quiet buzz of the TV in the background, the way his arm was lazily draped over her shoulders—fingers drawing slow, absentminded circles on the fabric of her sleeve. Their legs were touching. And how she was leaning into him like she didn’t even realize.

Wheezie tilted her head, curiosity already taking root. “Why do you call her baby?” She asked deciding to get the burning question she’s been dying to know off of her mind.

The question landed like a pin dropped into still water—barely a sound, but it rippled.

She froze, her pulse skipping like her body hadn’t caught up to her mind. Her eyes widened, and her breath caught. She could feel Rafe’s fingers still on her arm, but he didn’t move.

Didn’t even blink.

Instead, a small, smug smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth.

“Why wouldn’t I?” he replied smoothly, glancing at his sister like she was the one being weird.

Wheezie squinted at the two of them. “Because you’re not dating… right?”

Her entire face flushed. She could feel the heat rising to her cheeks, crawling down her neck, making her wish she could shrink into the mattress and disappear. Rafe, on the other hand, chuckled under his breath. That low, familiar sound that meant he was enjoying this far too much.

But then his eyes slid sideways—to her. Not just glanced. Looked. Really looked, like she was the only person in the room that mattered.

He didn’t answer.

“Rafe,” Wheezie pressed, now crossing her arms with all the boldness of a little sister who smelled something suspicious. “That’s not an answer.”

He grinned wider, that easy, arrogant grin that always made her nervous. “Go tell Rose I’ll be down in five.”

“That’s still not an answer!”

“Wheezie,” he warned, the playful edge in his voice soft but final.

She groaned, rolling her eyes dramatically as she turned to leave. “Whatever. You’re so weird,” she muttered under her breath before disappearing and pulling the door shut behind her.

Silence lingered.

She slowly shifted, pulling away just enough to feel the cool air hit the space where his body had been warming hers. She stared at the blanket pooled in her lap, carefully not looking at him to get her cheeks to cool down.

Rafe shifted beside her. “You okay?”

She nodded, but it was too fast. Too practiced. “Yeah.”

“You’re blushing,” he said softly, tilting his head toward her like he already knew the answer.

“Rafe…” she said his name with a quiet warning, already flustered, already spiraling.

He leaned in just a little, close enough that she could feel the warmth of his breath against her cheek. His voice dropped, teasing. “Did that make you nervous?”

The smirk on his face said he knew exactly what he was doing. He always did.

She swallowed. “You didn’t answer her.”

“No,” he agreed, his voice low. “I didn’t.”

Her throat tightened. “Why not?”

There was a pause, stretched thin and quiet.

Then his hand brushed against hers on the bed, fingers grazing hers once—twice—before gently slipping between them, like he’d been waiting for permission that never came but hoped for anyway.

“I like how it sounds,” he said quietly. “Calling you baby.”

Her breath caught in her throat. Her fingers tightened just slightly around his.

“I like the way you look at me when I say it,” he continued, voice hushed, almost hesitant. “Like you’re about to melt, but you’re too sweet to tell me to shut up.”

“I’m not too sweet,” she whispered, barely audible, eyes locked on their intertwined hands.

He turned his head slowly, his gaze dropping to her lips for a fleeting second before finding her eyes again. “Nah,” he murmured, “you are.”

She exhaled shakily, pulse fluttering. “You can’t say stuff like that.”

“Why not?”

“Because…” She faltered, the words catching in her throat. She didn’t have an answer that didn’t sound like a confession.

He tilted his head slightly, studying her. “Because it makes you feel something?”

She didn’t answer. Couldn’t. But the look on her face said everything.

He pulled back just a little, giving her space, but his hand stayed laced with hers, warm and steady.

“I’m not trying to mess with you,” he said after a long beat, the teasing gone from his voice. “I just… I don’t know. You’re the only person I feel good around. Like, really good. Like I can breathe.”

She blinked, slowly turning to look at him. His voice had softened in a way she rarely heard, and something in her chest tugged hard.

“And calling you baby?” He gave a faint smile, a small shrug. “It’s not just a nickname. It’s the only way I know how to show it sometimes. That you’re… different.”

The room felt heavy. Charged. Thick with all the things they hadn’t said yet.

She didn’t say anything right away—just let herself lean in again, gently resting her head against his shoulder like it was instinct, like it was home.

“You’re different for me too,” she whispered into the fabric of his shirt.

He stilled, then exhaled slowly. His breath was shaky this time.

Neither of them moved. The movie flickered on the screen, long forgotten. Outside, the house made its usual quiet creaks, but in here, it was just them.

Eventually, Rafe shifted, sliding his arm around her and tugging her closer until she was tucked beneath his chin, legs draped over his lap, her cheek resting against his chest. His fingers started moving again—soft, slow patterns against her back.

“Still blushing?” he asked, voice barely above a murmur, lips brushing the crown of her head.

“Yes,” she admitted, biting her lip to keep from smiling.

He chuckled. “Good.”

She groaned. “Rafe…”

“Hmm?”

She turned her face up just enough to peek at him, eyes narrowed. “You like making me blush.”

He didn’t hesitate. “Yeah. I do.”

She rolled her eyes, cheeks burning brighter, but her smile gave her away. “You’re impossible.”

He pressed a kiss to her temple, unhurried. “Yeah, but you love it.”

Her heart stuttered—once, then again—and this time, she didn’t look away. Didn’t hide it.

She just let it happen. Let him hold her. Let herself fall a little more.

And for the first time, it didn’t feel reckless.

It just felt right.

⸻

Later that night, when the sky had melted into dark navy sprinkled with stars, and the last light of day clung to the tops of the trees, Rafe walked her out to her car. The breeze was warm and slow, carrying the quiet hum of cicadas and the scent of summer grass. The whole world felt still—like it was holding its breath for them.

She glanced sideways at him as they reached her car, keys dangling loosely in her hand, heart fluttering like it always did around him. Rafe moved ahead and opened the car door for her without a word, leaning lazily against it with one arm braced above her, the other casually resting in his pocket. He was close. Always close.

She turned to face him, eyes soft. “Wheezie’s gonna ask again.”

His mouth tugged into a lopsided smirk. “Yeah. Probably tomorrow.”

“What are you gonna say next time?”

Rafe didn’t move for a second. Just looked at her with that unreadable glint in his eye, like he was weighing something. Then, with quiet confidence, he leaned in—crowding her gently between the open car door and the warmth of his body.

“That it’s none of her business,” he said, voice low and teasing.

She giggled, eyes dropping shyly to the space between them before flicking back up to his. Her cheeks were already warm.

Rafe’s hand slid up to her waist, squeezing lightly, grounding her. His other hand reached up, slow and deliberate, to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. But his fingers didn’t leave right away—they lingered, brushing lightly against her jaw, his thumb tracing the curve of her cheek like he couldn’t help it.

“Or,” he murmured, his gaze locked on hers, “maybe I’ll just tell her the truth.”

Her breath caught. “What’s the truth?”

He looked at her like she was something fragile and brilliant all at once—like she was a secret he’d been dying to say out loud.

“That I’m working up the nerve to ask you to be mine.”

The air stilled. Her chest rose sharply with the breath she forgot to take, her eyes wide, heart thudding so loud she was sure he could hear it. Her fingers curled slightly into the hem of her shirt as she stared at him, face tingling with heat.

“Yours?” she asked softly, voice barely there.

Rafe nodded once, gaze never wavering. “Yeah.”

A beat passed.

She looked up at him and something in her face softened.

“I like that,” she said quietly, her lips lifting into a bashful smile.

His brow raised slightly. “Yeah?”

She nodded, cheeks glowing, and before she could overthink it, he wrapped both arms around her waist and tugged her flush against his chest.

“So you like me, baby?” he teased, his voice low and rough, his breath brushing against her ear.

She let out a nervous laugh, face burning as she buried it against his chest, hiding from the intensity of it all.

He chuckled, deep and raspy, his chin resting lightly atop her head. “Say it, baby girl.”

She hesitated, her voice muffled against him. “I like you, Rafe.”

He smiled—she felt it more than saw it, the way his body relaxed, the way his arms tightened just a little around her.

“I like you too,” he murmured, pressing a slow, lingering kiss to the top of her head. She stayed tucked into him, neither of them in a rush to pull away.

For a few long moments, everything felt still again. Easy. Like this was always where they were meant to end up.

Eventually, he pulled back just enough to look down at her, his hand brushing her cheek one last time.

“Goodnight, baby.”

She gave him a look—sweet and shy and impossibly full—and stepped into her car, her fingers trembling slightly on the door handle as she shut it.

As she drove off, windows down and wind in her hair, her heart was floating somewhere above the clouds.

She didn’t stop smiling the whole way home.

[seraphicby]

But Why Not Me?

Kim Chaeyeon x Male Reader

Warning: These stories involved half non-con condition, please proceed with caution

2.6k+

It was Friday evening, and you were home early, you kick off your shoes, expecting the quiet of an empty house, Brother's school, Mom's out, Dad's probably still at work.

You step into the living room, suddenly a sound hits you like a train, a low moan, that's Chaeyeon's voice for sure, your best friend since you were kid.

It's coming from upstairs, from your dad's bedroom, and it's not just any moan, it's dripping with pleasure. Your stomach twist, but your feet move before your brain catches up, you have to come to that sound.

Each step up the stairs feels heavier, your pulse quickening as her voice clearer, another moan through, "Oh, fuck, yes, ahjussi!" voice sounds gasps.

You reach the door to your dad's room, cracked just enough to see, and the sight rips the air from your lungs.

Chaeyeon's sprawled on the bed, her shirt yanked up, full breasts bouncing free, nipples hard and pink, her skin slick with sweat.

Your dad's over her, shirtless, muscles tense, his hands gripping her hips as he thrusts into her, hard and deep. Her legs are spread wide, thighs trembling, her pussy glistening as she takes him, every stroke making her moan louder.

"God, yes, harder," she pleased, her voice breaking, fingers digging into his shoulders.

"Fuck me, please, don't stop, ahjussi!" she pants, her tits bouncing with each thrust.

Your dad grunts, "You like that, huh? Shit, so fucking tight," he growls, leaning down to suck one of her nipples, making her cry out.

"Oh, shit, yes, right there!" her hips buck to meet him, her moans breathless, "More, fuck, deeper,"

You're frozen, heart beating fast, your cock growing harder, throbs against your jeans. She's your best friend, considered as family, but seeing her like this, legs spread, pussy dripping, moaning like a slut for your dad.

You want to barge in, to scream, but you can't look away. Your dad thrusts harder, making Chaeyeon howling, "Fuck, I'm gonna cum, please, keep going, ahjussi!"

You stumble back, legs shaky, her moans echoing in your head as you retreat downstairs. Collapsing onto the couch, your hands tremble, the image of her, breasts bouncing, pussy fucked raw, begging for more, seared into your mind.

"So good, so fucking good," her voice had whimpered, and your dad's reply, "Take it all, baby" Jealousy crawling burn, not just for your dad having her, but for how she loved it, how she gave herself to him completely.

You've shared everything with her, secrets, years, trust, but this betrayal cuts deeper than you ever thought possible.

Monday rolls around, and you're home early again, the house quiet with humming of the AC.

You're halfway to your room when another sound stops you cold, a familiar moan, Chaeyeon's voice, but this time it's coming from your little brother's room.

Your heart drops, "No fucking way," you mutter, your feet move to the source of her sounds.

Her voice coming through again, "Oh, shit, yes, like that," high.

The door's little open, and you nudge it open just enough to see. There she is, Chaeyeon, naked, kneeling all four on your brother's bed, her ass in the air, her tits swaying with each thrust.

Your brother, barely 18, is behind her, hands gripping her hips, fucking her with a rhythm. Her pussy glistens, stretched around him, wet sounds mixing with her moans.

"Fuck, you're so good," she gasps, pushing back against him. "Don't stop, I'm close." Her head tilts back, hair spilling down her back.

Your brother groans, "God, you're so tight, Chaeyeon-noona," his hands sliding up to grab her breasts, pinching her nipples.

She cries out, "Yes, fuck, right there!" her moans louder, more unhinged, as he pounds into her harder.

This sight is a knife to your gut, her body, the ones you've eyed for years, now bare and squirming for your brother. Your cock hardening painfully in your jeans, and you hate how your body reacts, how you can't tear your eyes away from her flushed face, her parted lips, her pussy taking every thrust.

He slaps her ass, and she cries, "Harder, fuck me harder."

You see the moment she comes, her body shaking, a loud "Oh, fuck, I'm coming!" as she collapses forward, still grinding against him.

Your brother grunts, "Shit, me too, noona!" pulling out just in time to spill across her back, his breath ragged.

You stumble back, retreating before they notice. Downstairs, you collapse onto the couch, hands shaking.

First your dad, now your brother, Chaeyeon's fucking your whole family, and the thought makes you sick, but worse, it makes you jealous, the girl you've always wanted isn't yours, and maybe she never was.

It's Wednesday evening, and you're home.

Chaeyeon send a text, casual as usual: "You free? Wanna hang out?"

Your hands shake, staring at the message. Why not you? Why your dad, your brother, but never you?

You text back: "Come over. Now," no emojis, no jokes.

She arrives ten minutes later, knocking lightly before stepping inside, like always.

She's in a loose black tank top and shorts, hair messy tied side ponytail, "Hey, you okay? Your text sounded cold," she says, tossing her phone onto the couch, settling in like it's her second home.

You don't answer, your eyes locked on her, the way her top hugs her chest, nipples faintly visible, her bare thighs smooth and inviting. Your cock throbs, and you don't hide it, your rage drowning out reason.

"Chaeyeon," you say, voice low, "Why not me?"

Her brow furrows, confusion flickering. "What'd you mean-"

You cut her off, stepping closer, "I saw you. With my dad. Then my brother. You're fucking everyone but me. Why?"'

"Oh, uh... I didn’t mean for you to..." she stammers, "I was waiting. For you, really... I wanted it to be special..."

"Special?" you snap, your voice rising. "You're fucking my family, and I'm supposed to wait?" You grab her wrist, hard, yanking her up from the couch.

She gasps, stumbling, "Wait, stop, what're you doing...?" she says, voice trembling, trying to pull back, but you're stronger, your grip hardens.

"Shut up," you drag her upstairs, her protests ignored as she stumbles behind you, "You gave it to them, now it's my turn."

She's shaking her head, "No, please, not like this," but you don't listen.

You shove open your bedroom door, pushing her inside, slamming the door shut. You pin her against the wall, your body crushing hers, her breasts pressed against your chest.

She's trembling, "Please, we can talk, I didn't mean...-" but you cut her off, kissing her hard, forcing your tongue into her mouth.

She struggles, pushing against you, but you're not stopping, your hands tearing at her tank top, ripping it up.

Her tits spill out, full and perfect, nipples hard despite her fear. You grab them, squeezing roughly, and she whines, "Stop, this isn't right..."

"You didn't stop for them," you cut, yanking her shorts down, leaving her bare, her pussy exposed, already glistening even though she protests.

Your cock aches, and you shove your jeans down, freeing yourself, "My turn now."

She shakes her head, tears in her eyes, "Please, I wanted you, but not like this."

You don't care anymore, you push her onto the bed, pinning her down as she squirms, "No, please, don't!" her voice cracks,

You spread her thighs, your cock brushing her entrance. "You fucked them, it's my time to get to fuck you now," you say, thrusting into her hard, her pussy tight and warm.

She cries out, her body responds, "Ahh it's hurts!"

“Fuck, you're so tight," you grunt, slamming into her, each thrust fueled by anger you hold until now.

She's sobbing, "Stop, I'm sorry," but her hips move slightly, her pussy clenching around you, and you take it as permission, fucking her harder.

"You love it, don't you?" you growl, grabbing her tits, pinching her nipples as she gasps, "No, please..." she moans, her body shaking as you pound into her, the bed creaking rhythmly

"You gave it to them," you say, flipping her onto her stomach, pulling her ass up and thrusting back in, deeper.

She screams, "Please, I didn't mean to hurt you!" but you pull her hair, making her arch, your cock buried in her. "Don't care," you snarl.

She's trembling, her pussy tightening, a choked moan escaping. "Fuck, I'm coming," she gasps, her voice breaking, and you feel her shakes, pushing you over the edge. You pull out, spilling across her ass, your breath heavily.

Your cock, still half-hard, twitches at the thought of her body, her tight pussy, the way she came even though she is protest. You're not done.

"Chaeyeon," you say, your voice rough.

She flinches, her head snapping up, eyes wide tearing, "No, please," she whispers, scrambling to pull the sheet over herself. "Not again, I can't..."

You rip the sheet away, exposing her curves, her full tits, her thighs still slick from before. "You could for them," you growl, grabbing her ankles and yanking her toward you.

She gasps, trying to twist away, you pin her thighs open, her pussy bare and swollen. "You screamed for my dad, for my brother. Now you're gonna scream for me."

"No, please, I'm sorry," she sobs, her hands pushing against your chest, but you're not listening.

Your cock's throbbing hard now, you line yourself up, her wetness betraying her again as you slam into her, harder than before.

She cries out, "Fuck!" escaping her lips, her body arching. Her pussy's tighter this time, clenching around you.

You groan, "God, you're so fucking perfect," thrusting deep, each stroke shaking the bed.

She cries, "Stop, it hurts," but her hips jerk slightly, her body responding even as tears stream down her face.

You lean down, grabbing her tits, squeezing them hard, pinching her nipples until she gasps, "Oh, fuck!"

You thrust her harder, "You love this, don't you?" you snarl, your hand sliding to her throat, pressing just enough to make her gasp. "You came for them, you'll do the same for me."

"No, please, oh, shit!" she cries, her head uncontrolled, but her hips start to move, bucking up to meet you despite herself.

You lean down, sucking her nipple hard, biting just enough to make her yelp, "Fuck!" her voice is breaking, her body trembling as you pound into her, your hand finding her clit, rubbing fast and rough.

"You love it," you growl, feeling her tighten around you, her moans louder now. "No, I... oh, fuck, I..." he shakes her head, tears streaming, but her body betrays her, her pussy clenching as you slam in deeper.

"Oh, God, yes!" she gasps, her voice dissolving into a moan as you pull her legs over your shoulders, angling deeper, hitting spots that make her squirm more.

You don't hold back, fucking her with everything you have, your anger and lust pouring into each thrust. Her tits bounce with every slam, her face flushed, her eyes giving approval as her protests slowly gone.

"Harder,” she whispers, almost to herself.

You do, gripping her hips so hard you'll leave bruises, pounding her until the room fills with the wet slap of skin and her broken moans.

"Fuck, I'm... oh, fuck, I'm... I'm coming!" she screams, her body convulsing, her pussy squeezing you so tight it pulls a groan from your chest.

She's lost in it now, her sobs turning to gasps, her hands clawing at your back, pulling you closer.

"Say it," you demand, slowing just enough to make her whine, "Tell me you love it."

Her eyes meet yours, "I... fuck, I love it," she moans, her voice shaking. She's melting, her body giving in completely, her hips grinding against you, chasing more.

"Please, don't stop," she begs, and you smirk, flipping her onto her stomach, yanking her ass up and slamming back in.

"Fuck!” you growl, pulling her hair, making her arch as you fuck her even harder, her moans now pure pleasure, no trace of protest.

"Yes, fuck!" she cries, her pussy clenching again as another orgasm rips through her, her body shaking, her screams filling the room.

You're close, the sight of her, completely undone, moaning like she did for them but louder, pushing you over the edge.

"Fuck, Chaeyeon!" you pull out, flipping her onto her back, straddling her chest. "Open," you order,

Her mouth parting willingly as you stroke yourself, "Fuck!!" cumming hard across her face, thick ropes of cum painting her lips, cheeks, and chin.

She's panting, trembling beneath, her face a mess, her eyes half closed in a daze, "Fuck..." she whispers, her voice soft.

You collapse beside her, your chest heaving, the reality of what you've done crashing in.

She's silent for a moment, then curls into you, her body warm and shaking. "I didn't want it like this," she murmurs, but there's no fight in her voice, "But, if this make you satisfied... then I'm pleased..."

"Chaeyeon," you mutter, your cock already hardening again.

She flinches, her eyes fluttering open, fear flickering as her eyes teary, "No... no more," she shifting, pull away, "I can't... it's too much."

You're not listening, your hands already moving, gripping her hips, pulling her back to you.

"You can," you growl, flipping her onto her back, pinning her wrists above her head.

She gasps, "Please, I'm sore," but her thighs part slightly, her pussy still wet, glistening from before, and you know she's not done, not really.

You lean down, sucking her nipple hard, biting just enough to make her cry out, "Fuck!"

Her body arches, betraying her, and you thrust deep into her again, her pussy tight and warm, clenching around you like it was made for you.

She screams, "Oh, God, too deep!" but her hips jerk up, meeting your thrusts.

You fuck her harder than the last, the bed slamming against the wall, her tits bouncing wildly.

"You like this, don't you?," you snarl, your hand sliding to her throat, pressing lightly.

"Fuck, yes," she gasp, her eyes roll back, her resistance gone, her body giving in completely, "More," she moans.

You pounding into her, your fingers finding her clit, rubbing fast.

"I'm coming, fuck, I'm coming!" her pussy clamps down, her body shaking, and you keep going, not letting her recover, chasing your own high.

You pull out, flipping her onto her stomach, yanking her ass up and slamming back in.

"Fuck, Chaeyeon!" you growl, pulling her hair, making her she screams, "Yes!! Ahh!!"

Her pussy's so tight, so wet, and you fuck her like you're trying to break her, her moans turning into gasps pleasured, "More, please, don't stop.

"You spank her ass, hard, leaving red marks, and she yelps, "Fuck, again!" You do, over and over, until she's trembling, coming again.

Hours spent. You take her in every way, on her back, her knees, her side, her riding you.

You bend her over the desk, fucking her from behind, her hands clawing at the wood, "Fuck, you're so deep!"

You push her against the wall, her legs wrapped around you, her pussy dripping as she begs, "Cum in me, please."

You pulling out to spill across her tits, her stomach, her face, marking her over and over.

By dawn, she's wrecked, cum streaked, sweat soaked, her body limp, her eyes half closed in a pleasured.

You've fucked her all night, harder than you thought possible, and she's melted completely.

You don't know what’s left of your friendship, or if you've destroyed her forever, but as she lies there, her body for you, you know one thing. Tonight, she was yours, and you'll never forget it.

[reverie-starlight]

ty for the tag!! omg lucky! shidou, my beloved 🥹

results: i was so ahead of the curve that the curve became a sphere;; lighting a cigarette in the cold with shaking hands. but are they shaking because of the cold weather? you grew up too early. the older child syndrome. gifted burned out kid. you train every day, but the weight of expectation is still too heavy. were you perceived as a person or as an idea? you are afraid of being a disappointment. what made you quit your favorite activity? lack of stomach juice to digest the fact that the bar is really too high? your words are like spears, only the tips are on both sides and hurt you too. you didn't mean it. you are very sensitive, although you don't show it. because of this, your actions are often misunderstood. you are ready to sacrifice yourself for a dear person. is this altruism or a form of self-harm? "burn all bridges". sometimes you want to come to warm yourself, but there is only ashes left. your talent is your greatest curse. "with great power comes great responsibility," right? it's okay to be vulnerable. you know, you don't always have to be the best. think back to the time when your hobby was just a fun activity, not a chore. you can always ask for help. it won't make you weak or pathetic. you are not a robot. you have the right to say no. or just not want to do something. or just do something without a reason and without any backward motives. without plans, strategies, tactics. just because you like it. allow yourself to be the child you were not allowed to be. because if not now, when?

uh. so. I didn’t appreciate that 🤠

tagging: anyone who wants to join!!!

tag gamee !! BLUELOCK VERSION !

do this quiz and share your results :)

What i got:

damn i didn't know I'd get michael kaiser 😭😭

no pressure tags <3: @sugarcoatedtooth @kuronarnze @iliketoeatsouls @killuasskateboard

[hahaifolded]

hello!!!!!

I don’t know if this is a stupid or unnecessary ask but how would Kyle and the team react to Soap and Reader’s break up? Would they notice a difference since Soap wouldn’t be so happy and loud anymore? Maybe he would just whine and complain the whole time, and it happened too much that one of them pushed him to confess what happened (I would believe that to be Kyle since we called him and not the captain or such). I might be going off topic and beginning to rant right here, I am so sorry!!!! 🫶🏽

Enjoy this rough, continuation of Cellophane (Johnny "Soap" MacTavish x POC!GN Reader

Warnings: MDNI, ANGST (racism), comparatively not as bad as the first part, Johnny still sucks however, mid-writing, abrupt ending Author's Note: You know what, I wasn't going to do a part two but I read this and boom... thoughts! Thank you for the ask, @shitaaba

Has the sun ever felt better on his skin? Gaz doesn’t think so.

What a perfect day! No early meetings or training. Sun is shining, the town isn’t too busy, and Kyle finally has time to hit that coffee shop you and Johnny showed him all those months ago. 

You and Johnny… what a beautiful couple. Well mostly you but Kyle will keep that to himself as he doesn’t need Johnny on his back for “fucking you with his eyes” again. His teammate sure is a lucky man, especially since Kyle isn’t a homewrecker, because if Gaz had his way, you’d be right next to h— 

“Ah!” Kyle quickly grabs at the poor soul that he smacked into. 

“Shit, so sorry. Are you ok… oh, it’s you!” he first apologizes then gleams. What a strange coincidence. Is this manifestation? 

You look up and immediately pull away from his grasp. Your eyes are wide as they wander for a quick getaway. “Don’t even worry about it. If you’ll excuse me,” you rush out as you side-step Kyle. 

Kyle blocks you and throws you a warm smile as an attempt to ease your embarrasment. “Woah, woah, why the rush? It’s been awhile. What, Johnny has you caged up?” Gaz laughs at his own joke. He thought that would for sure make you laugh. It doesn’t.

Your face falls, and for the first time ever, Kyle sees you shrink. Your energy completely dissipates as discomfort overtakes you. 

“Hey, everything okay?” Kyle softens his voice and reaches out, laying a gentle hand on your upper arm in an attempt to lift you up. You slowly step away from it which only worries Kyle more. “What happened? Did Johnny do something?” 

“John and I broke up.” 

-- -- --

“Up for drinks tonight boys? My treat,” announces Price at the end of the team meeting.

“Sure.”

“As long as you pay, I’ll follow you anywhere.”

“Can’t.”

“Again Johnny? This is the fifth time you’ve bailed on us,” Ghost remarks. 

Soap lets out a deep laugh. “You’re just bitter that I have something sweeter waiting for me at home.” Ghost rolls his eyes while Price laughs. 

“Wanker.” 

Soap, Ghost, and Price all turn towards Kyle. Did he just call Soap a wanker? Why?

“Just a wee joke. Meant no harm,” Soap yields. Gaz just rolls his eyes and continues packing his things. 

Instead of engaging with Gaz, Johnny decides to concede and continue packing. Clearly something is bothering his fellow sergeant but Soap knows it's better to wait until Kyle opens up. And if he’s honest to himself, he really doesn’t have the capacity right now for other people’s problems.  He has enough of his own. 

“Before I forget, ma has been nagging me to bring you guys over for dinner again. Worried that we’re starving or something. Think next week works for all of ya?” 

“Sure.”

“Should I bring anything?”

“Your mom okay with me coming?”

Ghost and Price do a double take as Kyle’s question catches them off guard. Kyle pays them no attention as he stares down Soap who’s smile drops. 

However, as fast as it dropped, it immediately reappeared. “What kind of question is that? Course she knows,” the Scotsman smiles. 

Kyle chuckles in disbelief. “Really? So she knows about me but not your bird?” 

“What?” Soap’s entire demeanor changes. His confident, go-lucky self crumbles, now replaced with shame and discomfort. “What are you on about?”

“Mate, you can’t be serious?” Kyle barks. He takes a step forward towards his counterpart but is stopped by a confused, but attentive captain. Price steps in and asks for an explanation. 

Kyle stares Soap down and bites, “you want to tell them or should I?”  All color drains from Soap's face

“That’s enough you two,” Ghost jumps in, unable to take this anymore. “Whatever problems Johnny is having with his bird is between him and—“

“They broke up two months ago!” Kyle finally exclaims. Ghost’s eyes widened. Price’s jaw drops. That made no sense as just last week, Johnny went on and on about the perfect getaway you two went on. Ghost and Price look to Johnny for answers, but with the way Johnny is standing, head down, shoulders slumped, their questions are answered. 

“Johnny, what happened?” Price tries to comfort the Scotsman. He saw how happy you made the sergeant happy. He even had a heart-to-heart with Johnny when he expressed his desire to marry you. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“I’ll tell you why.” And with that, Kyle goes off. He tells the team how Johnny, despite claiming to love you more than life itself, refused to fight for you. ”I bet you’re just like your parents,” spits Kyle. 

“You don’t get it,” counters Johnny. His face twists in despair. 

“What’s not to get? Your parents are fucking racist and you refuse to do anything about it.” Kyle couldn’t believe it. Johnny is his friend, his comrade, his brother in arms; despite everything they’ve gone through, Kyle thought he could trust the Scotsman. And worst of all, he wasn’t the one who got hurt, it was you, sweet, beautiful you got hurt. “You’re pathetic. You never fucking deserved them!” 

“That’s enough,” Price puts his foot down. His face stern. He gestures to Soap and sends him to his office. Soap drops his head and nods in defeat. As Johnny walks away, Price lets out a deep breath and asks Ghost to watch Kyle before heading off himself.

The lieutenant and sergeant stand in silence as Kyle is way too angry to speak and Ghost is just uncomfortable by the entire situation. Did Johnny really lose you because of his parents? Ghost couldn’t believe it. He’s seen firsthand how Johnny furiously defended you during late nights out at the bar when other soldiers got a little too crude with the way they spoke about you. Ghost personally has had to rip the sergeant off one too many times from rude allies. What made Ghost even more uncomfortable was the amount of time he’s spent with Johnny’s family and never once got the feeling that his parents were racist. They’ve always been kind to the Lietenant. He assumed it was because of his rank or even his own past, never for… 

“Kyle?” Kyle cocks his head towards Ghost, eyes still buring with rage. “Has his parents ever…”

“No,” Kyle admits. He exhales deeply, his shoulders easing a bit. “I mean, there's been some weird comments here and there but I just assumed it was cause they’re old, never…” Kyle trails off, clearly affected by everything. 

Ghost just nods. He stays quiet for a bit until another question pops in his head. “Are they okay?” 

Kyle shrugs his shoulders. “They’re alright. Still hurt but they’ll survive” 

Ghost hums. He has a million other questions but decides to stay quiet. As much as he wants to know how Kyle found out or what (but really who) you’re doing these days, Ghost sees that Kyle is just exhausted. So with that, the two men finish packing in silence. With their bags in hand, they both leave the conference room, walking side by side in the hallway. 

Kyle pulls out his phone and lets out a small chuckle. Ghost can’t help but give Gaz a weird look. What’s so funny? 

“You know something, L.T., I don’t even feel bad anymore.” Ghost tilts his head as Kyle shows him something on his phone.

You: Saturday works for me! 

Word Count: 1246

Thanks for reading! - Fold's Page Guide + Masterlist

[slayerkitty]

The Unofficial TaUs Timeline

(as written to the best of our knowledge by @blu-eyed-demon and myself. Disclaimer: The dates and events are to the best of our recollection and memory. If they are not 100% accurate or in exact chronological order, please forgive us as the bulk of this was written until the wee hours one night on a whim and stuff started to run together.)

When things first started happening, I hadn't been dragged into this, but @blu-eyed-demon is a big BOC fan, so they were paying some attention.

Ta, Us, and 2J start attending events as a trio throughout Summer 2024

August 31st, 2024: BOC announces that Us' contract has expired, 2J's (his KP partner) would be ending Oct 31st, 2024.

Fall 2024, exact date unknown: Copper (Ta's partner from DFF), departs for the UK for school (unofficially splitting their pairing).

Fans start assuming that when 2J's contact ended, he and Us would maybe sign somewhere else as a pair - but practically the second 2J's contract ends, he joined the cast of Lover Merman and immediately started sailing his new ship.

(this is around when I came into the picture, @blu-eyed-demon messaged me and was like, "Ta and Us are doing things, it feels weird, you know more about BL branded pair marketing than I do, is this weird? YES, IT WAS WEIRD.)

Ta and Us' social media started to feature each other a lot at this point (road trips - they went to the Heart Burger restaurant!, photoshoots, and even meals in Us' car at Us' families coffee shop).

ChalarmJames posted a clip of a workshop, where James was lying his head on Chalarm's lap and then the camera pans over and the joke was that he was mocking Us, who had his head in Ta's lap! (still no idea WHY these four were workshopping together)

In another workshop around the same time, TaUs posted IG pics/clip of them drawing on each other's hands and feet (FEET!)

The BOC Halloween party had a drunken revelation about two of the actors confirming they were a couple - two pairs were speculated: PongTong or TaUs (it ended up being PongTong and we all saw how that went, yikes).

During this period there was a noticeable uptick in their skinship, closeness, and even sniff kisses.

More surprising IG stories followed: Ta and Us did a week long training with a real class of recruits at a police academy (STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS FOR EITHER AND IT'S DRIVING ME INSANE).

Love is Like a Bike press conference was announced in early November 2024, Ta and Us are confirmed to be attending the press conference.

The press conference to officially announce the cast was held on November 24th, 2024 and Ta was slated to play one half of a secondary pairing in the show… BUT NOT WITH US. While Us was in the show, Ta was actually paired with another actor named Nanon (I'm going to be so real, I do not remember this guy's name)

(At this point, I told @blu-eyed-demon I had no idea what the fuck TaUs were doing. If they had been paired for the Bike BL, then I would have said "oh, they were soft launching, makes sense". BUT THEY WEREN'T. So my other thought was "well, fuck me, maybe they're dating, idek?")

Heading into December 2024, Toey (Ta's sibling, who just made a movie with Fourth from GMMtv), started attending events with TaUs.

There was an awards show (I can't even begin to remember which one ooops), where the cast of the Bike BL attended. Ta took ONE pic with Nanon and spent the rest of the time with Us and Toey.

(This is the second and last time we saw Ta and Nanon interact publicly, EVER)

BOC's NYE countdown party brought more fun: Ta took one pic with Copper (who was home for the holidays) and spent the entire night with Us, WHO WASN'T EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE THERE, HE CAME AS TA'S +1). They were caught sharing drinks, holding hands, hugging, and at least one sniff kiss.

They did a joint Chinese New Year photoshoot, where Ta was sitting on a throne and Us was perched on the arm next to him (it read very, very couple-y, imo).

Also for Chinese NY, they visited 9 temples together as part of Buddhist practices (accompanied by Toey).

On Valentine's Day 2025, they released a tiktok where they danced together to "How Deep is Your Love"

Us brought Ta a cake at Ta's birthday event in February 2025 (and Ta gave him a special cupcake of his own).

One of the road trips they had taken was filmed for Tong's (former KP castmate) you tube channel and dropped in March 2025. There was a "hickey" discussion back when it was filmed because pics of Ta had some questionable marks. Ta said it was from "playing airsoft." (Sure, Jan)

March 1st, 2025: Ta's contract ended with BOC. Ta, Us, and Toey all confirmed they were under the same management, Bright Venture Artists.

Either in March or April 2025, TaUs did their first joint interview. It was poorly subbed, but we were able to glean that they considered themselves a pair (unclear in what capacity) and they had future upcoming plans. They also promised that they would have a Big Announcement ‘sometime soon’ but couldn’t even give hints.

Other things learned during this interview: since DFF, Us does Ta's make up. He doesn't have a make up artist. Also, they use Guu/Mueng pronouns for themselves/each other (both of which are considered vulgar and offensive unless you are extremely close).

After Songkran, things went quiet. Love is Like a Bike had released schedules for workshopping, costume fitting, script read throughs but according to social media, nothing seemed to be happening. Everything was suddenly very hush-hush for no apparent reason. 

TaUs attended the KP reunion (via Jeff) together

May 14th, 2025: the Bike BL IG makes a huge casting announcement. Nanon was no longer with the show and his character would now be played by Us.

And that is the timeline of how TaUs became a branded pair in the most ass backwards way possible (and the six months of insanity, frustration, and cage rattling that @blu-eyed-demon and myself suffered during that time period.)

Tagging by request: @respectthepetty @babyangelsky @italianpersonwithashippersheart @benkaben @callipigio @lukaherehelp

And if anyone wants to see the tik tok compilation that @blu-eyed-demon put together, it's here: https://youtu.be/H2HftdRaqdg?si=x4Y6ac5mWp0lUu6d

[voidpvllman]

freaks • bob reynolds

summary: the early days of a new team being assembled: the settling, the fighting, the dysfunctional dynamics that lead into a family, and maybe even something more. bob is desperate and pining, too awkward to say anything, or getting interrupted every time he tries or finally talks himself into it. you are angry at the world, now once again fighting for people that turned on you after you lost control. stuck living with people you barely tolerate, eventually like, and could maybe even love. training and fighting, being pushed to get your powers back, after swearing to never use them again; all while fighting off sneaking feelings that feel a lot like love.

content: angst, jealousy, void (almost) and sentry appearances! pining, anger issues, mention of self harm, self hatred, bpd, traumatic pasts, fluff, kinda family dynamic, kissing, slow burn, sexual themes but not explicit, desperation, a little makeout

[ ʳᵉᵃᵈᵉʳ ʰᵃˢ ᵖᵒʷᵉʳˢ ˢᶦᵐᶦˡᵃʳ ᵗᵒ ˢʰᵃⁿᵍ ᶜʰᶦ: ˢᵏᶦˡˡᵉᵈ ᵃᵗ ᵐᵘˡᵗᶦᵖˡᵉ ᵐᵃʳᵗᶦᵃˡ ᵃʳᵗˢ, ˢʷᵒʳᵈ, ᵇᵒʷˢᵗᵃᶠᶠ, ᵉᶜᵗ; ʰᵃⁿᵈ ᵗᵒ ʰᵃⁿᵈ, ᵃˡᵒⁿᵍ ʷᶦᵗʰ ᵃᶦʳ ᵐᵃⁿᶦᵖᵘˡᵃᵗᶦᵒⁿ

yelena flipped you over on the mat; leg wrapped over your hip, laughing as she pinned your face to the ground. you groaned, slapping the mat in defeat, “this is pointless! i’m not getting any better.” you hated how hard you were breathing; you hated how easily you had been beaten again. “don’t be so hard on yourself… most people can’t beat me. especially when you’re out of practice.” you glared at her at her subtle brag, “i’m just saying, you have only been training again for two weeks.” “and i don’t think i’m getting any better, yelena! i just- i don’t.. succeed at anything anymore. i can’t do anything…” yelena sighed, watching you sadly, “i know we haven’t known each other long… but from what i have seen, no one else here can handle a sword? and that’s pretty damn cool. you are our best brains, you keep us all on schedule and map out our missions and make the plans-“ “i don’t know what you saw on my file, yelena, but… i don’t even think i could lift a sword anymore. i haven’t… i’m retired.” you exhaled, laying flat out on the mat, “i got someone hurt, i lost control… ever since, it’s like everything is just… gone.” yelena watched you sadly, “that was ten years ago! you were a child...” you just shook your head, “i think i’m done for the day. i- i don’t think i’m ready. i may not ever be.” you crossed the gym floor, feeling much angrier and more frustrated than you had before you started. you ignored the grunts and swears coming from the mat, now that two competent people were fighting. you glanced over your shoulder as bucky sent walker flipping to the ground. john groaned, holding his ribs as he sat up, “damn,” “sorry.” bucky shrugged, “you’re lighter than you look.”

you turned your attention to the punching bag in front of you, taking all of your anger and frustration out in a punch. it felt good to hit something that didn’t fight back or send you straight onto your back. you felt a low growl come from your throat and suddenly all the frustration and anger became the bag’s issue. you relentlessly punched out, fists stinging as you made contact over and over. you ended up screaming at it, beating at it until you saw blood on the bag. you looked down at your knuckles; skin peeled back, blood dripping between your fingers. “damn it.” you should have wrapped your knuckles, you should have warmed up more. there was a cramp in your side, tears blurring your vision- from the pain in your knuckles or frustration, you weren’t sure but you just felt embarrassed now. the others were looking at you from across the room, concerned, worried, maybe judging slightly.

you felt anger surge in you again as you turned away, storming back to your bag. your knuckles throbbed, stinging as the open air tickled against the open skin. you swore quietly, hating how useless you felt, hating how pathetic you looked against the rest of the team, hating yourself for how you had let yourself get this way. “hey,” you jumped, pulled from your thoughts by the shy voice, “are you okay?” you held your breath, pushing away the pain and anger as glanced to bob over your shoulder, “fine,” you always made sure you kept your tone from reflecting your emotions, “i’m okay. just frustrated… and angry and…” you zipped your gym back up a little too roughly, cursing as the zipper tab snapped off. “damn it!” bob tilted his head slightly, eyeing you sadly, “are- are you sure you’re okay?” you sighed, finally looking up to to meet his gaze, “i’m just not having the best day, alright?” your tone sounded impatient, but there was still that hint of softness. “oh…” bob deflated just slightly at your change in tone, “sorry…” you rubbed your face, now angry at yourself for being cold to the one person here that didn’t push you in training, didn’t demand you try harder, didn’t wait for you to be better again. “i’m sorry. i- i don’t mean to be a bitch, i-“ bob looked up at you, eyes widening slightly; he wasn’t used to the others apologizing for raising their voices or snapping when he got in their way. “you aren’t-!” he had said it a little too quickly, “you… i don’t think you’re a-…” bob ducked his head slightly, shyly, as if he didn’t want to say the word. you smiled just slightly to yourself; he was charming, in his shy, awkward ways. “well, thank you. it seems you’re the only one that thinks that…” you hauled your bag over your shoulder. bob was muttering something to himself, before his voice finally came out loud enough to hear, shaking slightly, “hey, would you ever want to go—“

“nice job on the bag, time bomb!”

you tensed at the nickname, snapping your head to look at walker; he meant it playfully, but god, the anger that spiked through you made your hands shake. bucky looked at you darkly, sending a warning glare over to john, shaking his head just barely. “thanks walker, i was picturing your face!” bob snorted, face turning red as he tried covering it with a cough. you glanced at him just barely, eyes twinkling with something playful and kind. bob somehow reddened even more, hand coming to rest on his neck to scratch an imaginary itch. “i’m going on a grocery run. have a list ready when i’m out of the shower.” there were nods of acknowledgment around the room, though bob, thankfully unnoticed, was now struggling at the mention of you in the shower.

you dried your hair just enough that it wouldn’t soak through your shirt once you put it on. you stared at yourself in the mirror, towel still tucked securely around you. how did you get here? with these people, once again fighting everyone’s wars, once again fighting for people that had nearly called for your incarceration after saving them the last time. you grabbed the black t-shirt tossed beside you and pulled it over your fresh sports bra. it was hot out, but you hated shorts, so you decided on your favorite pair of jeans. they had holes in them, the denim was worn thin, but you couldn’t bare to throw them away. you were just going to the grocery store, and could have just thrown sweatpants on, but you felt that you needed the comfort of something familiar and sentimental- for emotional support- today. you tossed your towel in your laundry basket and grabbed your phone and keys. your boots were nearly as worn through as your jeans, and you swore within a month the soles would have holes in them. bob was sitting on the couch, nose buried in a book as you crossed through the living room area. you spared him a glance, small smile creeping on your lips. you heard what the others said about him, how he was unstable and dangerous. but you just saw you. broken, misunderstood, completely forgotten and abandoned by the world.

bob looked up, eyes widening as he caught you staring. “hi-“ his voice failed him, coming out as a squeak, then a cough to cover it up. “hey,” you held back your amusement at his shyness he still had towards you, even after living in the same house. bob kept his eyes on you, soft, expectant. waiting for you to say something else, because god knew he wouldn’t. “i’m just.. going to get groceries for everyone…” bob closed his book, stumbling to his feet before his mind could stop him, “do you need help? it’s..late.. and…the city can be weird at night.” you couldn’t hear how fast his heart was beating, or see how much his cheeks had reddened, or feel the fact that he was about to throw up or pass out. “oh, no, i-“ you were planning to sulk all night, brooding with a murderous expression on your face— scaring off anyone who would approach you in public with your rbf alone. it could be nice to have someone for once, a distraction from your own friend, a break from hating the world, something like a friend… “sure. if you want to.”

bob’s knees almost buckled but he forced himself to play it cool. he wasn’t about to throw up. he wasn’t going to throw up on her boots… he wasn’t going about to pass out. he would not pass out every time she looked at him and collapse, tripping her in the street… “okay-“ his voice squeaked again and he felt his cheeks heat up. you just smiled at him softly, not laughing at his blushing, not making a joke about his damn voice crack.

bob didn’t stand a chance.

bob pulled on his shoes at a walk, nearly crashing into the table as he scrambled to pull on his sweatshirt and walk. you held back a laugh, propping the elevator door open with your hip as he caught up with you. “hi,” he was smiling again with those shy, anxious eyes widened just slightly, as they met your gaze. “ready to go?” he nodded, far too eagerly, trailing behind you as you stepped in the elevator and the doors closed. bob felt like the walls were closing in, the elevator heating up to a dangerous level. you glanced over to him again, your usual glare not present, “you okay, bob?” your voice was so soft and full of concern- towards him- bob almost melted. he swallowed quickly, forcing himself to nod once, “yes! yes. yes, i’m… i’m fine. i just..run hot.” the blush on his cheeks would be a nice cover for that lie. he did run hot, but he didn’t always feel like he was about pass out, throw up, and have his heart burst through his chest all at once.

bob’s eyes widened slightly as you clicked your car keys and a 1980’s mustang beeped in response. “you- you drive that?” he hadn’t meant to sound so surprised, he was just in awe of every aspect of you. “were you expecting something boring?” you met him with a playful smirk. “n–no! never! never from you.” he reddened even further, and almost matched the shade of your car. you kept a sparkling eye fixed on him until you climbed into the driver’s seat. bob climbed in beside you, slowly, head like a swivel as he took in the interior. you watched him and tried to fight the smile creeping up your lips. “do the others know this is what you drive?” you smirked devilishly, “nope. because i don’t want their food wrappers and crumbs in it.” bob’s eyes widened slightly, frantically patting his pockets incase he he had forgotten he had snacks with him. “bob, chill.” you laughed lightly, eyeing him in amusement. bob reddened again, sitting up stick-straight, “sorry, i- sorry-“ you laughed again, “relax...” you put your hand on bob’s shoulder and the heat on his cheeks now spread throughout all of him, rapidly. his eyes widened, snapping up to your soft smile and sparkling eyes. “it’s just us. you don’t have to be tense and…” you gestured to his fidgeting. bob breathed in deeply, “right. sorry.” being just us, as you had said, was actually even more nerve wracking and terrifying and dizzying. and relaxing around you was actually impossible because he was the only other side of conversation and felt like he couldn’t talk to you without sounding stupid or squeaking like a prepubescent child.

you passed your phone to bob as you backed out of the parking spot. he eyed you with wide eyes, feeling like he had been handed something sacred and very forbidden. “pick something,” he eyed you, glancing at the aux cord dangling between your fingers. the radio had been upgraded to connect to an aux, while everything else was authentic and classic. you caught him admiring and smirked, “i like older things, but i still need my music.” “i don’t- um- know…” bob scrolled through your spotify, feeling lost. “just pick something, robert! i’ll listen to anything.” “okay, uh-“ bob picked a random album, looking pale as he set the phone down cautiously. the first few notes started and you hummed, eyeing him quickly, “what-“ she say up straighter, “what did i do- did i not pick a good-“ you held your hand up, shaking your head, “it was a good choice. interesting…” bob felt like he was being tested and was terrified of failing it, “interesting good..?” “interesting, interesting. you didn’t pick anything modern, but you also didn’t just pick the first thing on my spotify. so you saw my music taste and picked accordingly. you didn’t choose journey, which is a classic choice, if not slightly basic. ac/dc was a good pick.” bob nodded, exhaled, breath shaking just slightly. you made his head spin. he loved it… “i don’t think i have the best music taste. i usually just..listen to whatever is on the radio. my dad would listen to older rock, but…” your eyes snapped to him and he nearly flinched, “does this remind you of him?” the way you looked at him, bob would never get used to. so intensely, so softly, so full of concern, like you really cared. like you saw him and not his mistakes. it was a softness, but it wasn’t pity; you looked at him like he wasn’t something fragile that needed to be tiptoed around. “i—“ god he had been lost in those eyes and his inner monologue about you. you had asked about his dad- had your music reminded him of his dad? no.. god, no. nothing about you could ever remind him of that monster… you were good and soft and light…the complete opposite of everything he grew up with and ever knew… “no, it’s- nice- i like it.” you eyed him again, looking for any tell in his eyes, “okay… good.” you smiled to yourself, silently making a note of how he looked at you. and at how much different you felt away from everyone else… with just him.

bob pushed the cart, trailing beside you, very aware of your hand resting on the handle of the cart, inches from his own. he had to remind himself to breathe, focusing so much on not moving his hand or twitching a finger that he didn’t hear you say his name. “sorry- i- what?” he looked to you with an embarrassed expression, cheeks flushing again. god, you probably thought he ran so hot that he was always inches away from overheating. “snack requests? niche brands you prefer?” “i-“ he couldn’t just request his very child like taste in food around you, even if he did really want the usual, comforting, favorites. “i don’t really…do snacks. i like…fruit and stuff…” you narrowed your eyes at him slightly, “boring. you sound like bucky and john.” he watched you grab a box of cereal— from the kids section, not the grown up protein cereal. you eyed it, picked up another one, compared them, grabbed a third box. “which one?” coco pebbles, captain crunch and apple jacks. “i-“ it was his type of comfort food; you had no idea what you were doing to him. you eyed them all again before dropping them all in the cart, “all of the above it is.”

damn it, you were perfect.

after entirely too long in the junk food isles, and a fit of inappropriately loud laughter over an unfortunately named generic brand of candy, the cart was looking like a preschool teachers’. “two twenty four packs of mac and cheese?” bob looked at you with a playful smirk. “yelena…” you eyed him playfully, “plus, it’s valentina’s bill.” bob laughed at this and it felt like the most natural thing in the world. he had fake laughed in too many scenarios; stiff and uncomfortable.

“in that case, we should get one more…”

you smirked, “i thought about it but i can’t reach it.”

bob cleared his throat, waved his hand dramatically and bowed. he reached over your head and grabbed the last box of yelena’s macaroni and cheese. you forgot he was six foot. he carried himself so small, like he was always scared to take up space. “why thank you, sir.” you smiled genuinely, feeling your face heat up- you had lost track of how many times you had laughed or sincerely smiled this evening… “hey, i think i’ll bring you on all my grocery runs from now on.” bob’s heart skipped at this, hiding his red face behind the box of macaroni and cheese, “please do,” it came out before he could stop it. bob stumbled over his words to try and save it, “i mean- you shouldn’t have to shop for a superhuman team alone. …a-lot of bags to carry..” you met his eyes and there was something in your expression- something behind the slightly narrowed eyes, the quirked up eyebrow, the barely there smirk. finally you spoke and bob could breathe again, “sounds good… it’s a date.”

bob could not breathe again.

most nights you spent alone, in your room reading, while most of the others were out on missions or training exercises. you and bob would occasionally pass each other on the way to or from the kitchen, nodding in acknowledgment with a small smile. you both were happy being alone, content in the silence, lost in a book or movie. lately, however, nights the others were gone, you had wandered out into the living room. bob was already there, half interested in his book. his eyes found yours immediately, a small, hopeful smile on his lips, a far too eager glint in his eyes. you sat beside him silently, shocking yourself that you had someone you didn’t mind keeping you company. bob shifted slightly, giving you more room as he turned back to his book in silence. this had become routine when the others weren’t around and the tower was quiet and void of stupid arguments or mission talk. each night started in silence, as if neither of you wanted to disturb the other, as if there was an invisible thing that kept you from getting too close or starting casual conversation. one night as you grabbed your book to head to the living room, you were stopped by bob, standing right outside your door. “hi-“ you exhaled, failing to hide the surprise in your voice. bob just smiled softly, “i was going to ask if you wanted to watch a movie…” oh? “okay?” you fought away the smile that wanted to spread across your lips and ignored the warmth spreading in your chest. “i um-“ bob looked at you nervously, not quite sure if you were agreeing to it or waiting for him to actually ask you. “so-“ he shifted slightly, already feeling stupid, “do you..want to?” this time you did smile widely, “sure,” you stepped aside and held your door open, to which bob’s eyes widened and he looked like he may faint. “oh- um-“ “you can come in, robert. i don’t bite.” bob looked truly ill, buy he stepped inside your room with his best attempt at a stable smile.

“unless you want me to.” you added with a playful smirk, watching as bob took in your room and then suddenly tensed. “i- oh- well-“ bob cleared his throat, trying to pull himself together and recover from your joke. bless your heart, you always tried lightening the awkward tension with playful jokes or sugestive comments. you couldn’t do things like that around bob; he physically couldn’t handle it and would now spend the next twenty minutes trying to calm himself down and remind himself that it was just a joke, no matter how much he really would have liked it if you- no. bob shook his head which earned a sideways look from you. “fine,” bob mumbled it, placing his pile of movie selections on the bed, hands resting casually against his waist. he had gotten himself all worked up and now was in an even worse situation. you had to force yourself to look at the bed, force yourself to ignore his twitching and obvious situation. you really should stop teasing him, after all it had started innocently and playfully… but now… no. no time for that. you picked the closest movie, not really looking through them, but recognizing the title. “my tv is better than the one in there. for some reason, smartly- valentina assumed we wouldn’t be using the living room tv for group hangouts.” your voice was playful but it was hard to ignore there was a man sitting on your bed, in your room. you sat beside him, and he damn near scooted completely off the bed on the opposite side. “robert.” your voice was soft and scolding, “you don’t have to sit that far away. please get comfortable…” you eyed him, putting your spare pillows in the space beside you against the headboard for him. “are you sure- i can sit on the floor?” “i didn’t offer my room so you could sit on the floor awkwardly and be uncomfortable.” or maybe he would be more comfortable away from you and your stupid jokes… he looked at you quietly, still waiting for you to change your mind. instead, you pulled your covers back for both of you, looking at him softly, “robert.” bob finally climbed in next to you, sitting down so painfully slowly you thought he was terrified to wrinkle your sheets. you looked at him incredulously, simultaneously trying not to laugh. he winced in embarrassment, finally settled beside you, pulling your blankets over his legs. he wasn’t breathing. you could tell he wasn’t breathing because of how tense and awkward he looked. “robert,” you sighed, looking at him softly, wishing he could just fully relax around you, “i won’t bite you.” bob exhaled, finally sinking deeper into the bed and pillows behind him, the smallest playful smile on his lips, “unless i ask you to?” your breath caught in your throat as you turned to look at him. his eyes had darkened, playful expression gone; replaced with something hungry and testing. you were holding your breath now, suddenly very aware of how hot it was and how close he was to you. bob didn’t look away from you, for the first time since you had known him, he was looking at you with such intensity…and desperation that you felt shy. you wanted to look away, make more distance between you and pretend you didn’t notice the heat and electricity in the room. “right,” you finally squeaked out, nodding weakly. bob actually smirked, darkly, in amusement, clearly proud that he had for once gotten a reaction from you. he looked away from you, head falling against the headboard with a smug smirk. his jaw was clenched, clearly struggling with similar feelings as you, clearly trying to force them away. damn him… you cursed yourself for breaking your number one rule. never ever let anyone get close.

you pummeled the bag again, kick, punch, attempt to jump and kick higher, swear when you failed. the music in your headphones was loud enough to drown out any thoughts and make you deaf. just how you liked it… upper cut, right hook, punch to an imaginary gut. you were still very aware of the eyes that would occasionally look up from behind the pages of a book, watching you sweat and suffer. hitting the bag harder forced your mind away from him, away from the weekly grocery trips— that had also turned into introducing bob to different music, picking new nicknames for the team, a few inside jokes, and most recently, ice cream on the way home– away from the very clear shift that had happened three weeks ago. more often than not, it was the two of you left in the tower alone, while the others were off saving the world- or more minor things. they weren’t liabilities. they were trained. they didn’t have powers that needed to be held back so no one died. your heart was pounding, muscles throbbing, sweat pouring down your forehead and into your eyes. you wiped your eyes, squinting as you opened them once again.

john walker took up your entire field of vision, directly in front or you. you shrieked, throwing out your fist before you could process who it was. “god—!” john stumbled backwards, hand over his nose. “shit-“ you pulled your headphones over one ear, rushing towards john who was stumbling back to his feet. “i’m sorry- i didn’t-“ john pulled his hand away, blood covering his hand and dripping through his fingers. “oh—“bob had looked up, looking pale at the sight of the blood. “bob, get a towel—“ “i’m fine.” walker waved bob off, pushing away from you slightly, “you act like i haven’t been punched before.” you returned with your crumpled shirt from your back, smacking john’s hand away to hold it against his nose. it was better for a shirt to catch his bleeding nose, than his hands that caused blood to drip all over the floor. “thanks.” john reluctantly took the shirt from you, with a slightly apologetic look as he realized it was your shirt. “i can find another plain white shirt, i’m sure.” that one had been your favorite, but you could find another.

“i have been punched before.” he repeated it, the slightest hint of amusement on his face.

“not by me.”

“i think you broke it…” john almost sounded impressed. “you broke my focus…” you responded with a playful smirk. “why were you standing there anyway?” “i was trying to talk to you. i had been yelling for a full minute, but you couldn’t hear me over your angry music.” you grimaced apologetically, realizing sleep token was still blasting from the headphones around your neck. “sorry about my angry music.” your tone was sarcastic as you turned to pause the music from your phone. “why didn’t you ask bob to get my attention?” bob glanced up slightly at his name. walker glanced over to him with an eye roll of annoyance, “i tried.” bob smirked just slightly at this.

“he didn’t want to bother you. he said you were focused.”

“i was focused.”

“he said you might hit me.”

“i did.” you smirked to yourself and heard bob cough behind you. walker laughed this time and you were positive it was the first time he had appeared genuine in front of you; laughing, instead of scowling or complaining. “that was a hell of a punch.” your eyes glanced back to him, playful, amused, almost smug. “i mean it. it feels like you’re getting a lot stronger. it looks like it too.” walker eyed the muscles up your arms and to your shoulder; obviously more defined than they had been weeks ago. you watched his eyes study you, tensing slightly. john wasn’t even saying it in a flirty way- he wasn’t even looking at you like he was thinking anything like that- he didn’t make you feel uncomfortable, but it still felt off, standing this close to him with just your workout bra, soaked in sweat, still breathing hard… “next time you punch…” john gently cupped your elbow, guiding your arm to a different position. he moved your thumb just slightly, “you’ll break it otherwise.” something shattered behind you, causing you both to jump apart, eyes wide. bob was standing, eyes glowing golden, glossy, expression far away. “what are you doing, bobby-“ you shushed walker, taking another step away from walker. bob’s eyes snapped to you, golden rings gone from his irises. he looked confused, glanced at the bench he has been sitting at, trying to remember why he got up. “sorry, i-“ walker had tightened his fists slightly, waiting. “what did i…” bob glanced at to the glass bottle you had been drinking of, now shattered on the floor, “are you okay?” his confused expression immediately turned to concern, “did you drop it? don’t walk by it…” walker’s jaw was clenched, his eyes dark, expression failing to hide the confusion, caution, maybe even fear. “i’ll clean it up…” john sent a final glance to bob; it was cold, warning. you exhaled, not letting your expression falter as you gave bob a small smile, “come on… you can borrow a new book from my room, while i take a shower.”

you rubbed your face with the towel, still feeling the sweat on you. still feeling walker touch your skin. still seeing the burning in bob’s eyes when you looked at him. you wrapped the towel around your middle, groaning to yourself. you had other things to worry about besides whatever the hell that was. you didn’t need to worry about unstable flares of power showing, you didn’t need to worry about your skin tingling when someone touched your bare skin for the first time ever- without it being punishment or violent. you opened your bedroom door and nearly jumped out of your towel. “holy sh— bob!” bob was stretched out on your bed, new book in hand, eyes widening to what should have been an impossible size, “oh-“ it came out as a squeak. bob scrambled off your bed, collapsed to the floor, mumbling something as he tried to stumble back to his feet. “i’m sorry- oh god- i’m so sorry-“ you would have laughed at any other time; the redness on his face made it difficult to even be mad at him. you did say he could get a book from your room… you had never specified for him to take it somewhere else to read. you bit back a smile, trying not to laugh as he just stayed on the floor, on the opposite side of your bed. he was still muttering to himself, damn near hyperventilating. “robert.” no response. he was clearly afraid if he stood up you would shoot him. you shook your head, turning to your closet to find clothes. “robert…” no response. you rolled your eyes with a slight amused smirk, closing your closet door behind you. you pulled on sweatpants and a sweatshirt yelena had cut the neckline out of and then decided she didn’t want. it was not what you would usually wear; exposing your entire shoulders, loose on the arms and slightly baggy everywhere else; but she was right, it was comfortable.

when you stepped out of your closet, bob was waiting on the bed again. he was looking at the floor. “hey,” you snapped by his head and his eyes locked up to yours. “you okay?” you pushed the book aside and sat beside him. “i’m sorry.” he was fidgeting with the cuffs of his sleeves, “i’m sorry for- being in here- for- you told me to grab a book, i-“ “bob, it’s fine. honestly. i said you could come in here.” you had to talk him out of it before he started spiraling. “hey,” you placed the gentlest finger on top of his hand. his eyes snapped to your finger tapping the back of his hand. he breathed in shakily, eyes wide, staring at your finger like it had shocked him. his hand felt hot under your touch, his pulse quickening slightly against your wrist. “you can be in here, alright? i said you could. if you want to read… or sit on my bed… or if you ever need to talk.” he looked up at you with glossy eyes. he didn’t say anything, just looking at you, “it’s stupid.” you furrowed your brows, “what’s stupid–“

“it feels safe.”

bob looked to the floor again, clearly embarrassed, secretly trying to fight the urge to just get up and walk out. “being in here. being with you… you.” you exhaled, the words tumbling around in your mind, making your head spin, “you think i- you feel safe in here?” bob started fidgeting again, “i told you it was stupid.” “no- hey-“ someone felt safe with you. someone wanted to be around you, stay close to you, sit in silence with you, hang out in your room reading, reading while you worked out, volunteering to go to the grocery store with you. “it’s not stupid. it’s not. it’s really sweet, actually… it’s nice being looked at as.. someone comforting. instead of…” you shook your head, not wanting to go there, “don’t be embarrassed. it’s an honor. and really. come in here whenever you want. even if i’m not here. just- don’t… don’t be weird.” you nudged him with a playful smile, trying to break the serious tone. “oh- no! no, i would never do anything weird. i- i promise.” “i know, bob.” you gave him that same playful look, trying to assure him it was only a joke, “i let you in my car, remember?” bob laughed just a little, sad eyes looking up at you with the faintest smile.

bob leaned back against your headboard as he read, the fidgeting stopped, he was no longer radiating heat, he was just still, lost in a book, content. you glanced over at him occasionally, trying to focus on your own book, ignoring how close you were to someone else in your bed. “you and walker, then?” the words startled you right into a sitting position, looking over to him, hoping you had heard him wrong. he didn’t look up from his book, though his hands shook slightly, knuckles white as he held the book. you just stared at him, waiting, trying to process why this conversation was happening. “walker?” bob tensed slightly. bob said nothing, glaring into the book, eyes not moving on the page. was he- no. was he jealous? of walker?

“because of—?“

“it was me.”

he closed the book, sitting up quickly, face close enough to feel his breath, “the glass.” you held your breath, not sure if him remembering was a good thing… yet part of you wanted to hear him say it. to tell you why it happened. “i don’t know what happened. i was just sitting there and then walker—“ his hand shook slightly, eyes flashing, the slightest shadow passing across his face. “stop,” you grabbed both his hands in your own, “it’s fine. it doesn’t matter. no one got hurt…” “but they could have. you could have…” you exhaled slowly, “but i didn’t. glass breaks all the time… it got cleaned up and it won’t get brought up again.” “but if something happened-“ “nothing happened. walker was there, he-“ bob shook his head, twitching slightly, “can we not- don’t say his name…” his voice was still soft, but it had deepened slightly. this was what the others feared. the instability in his movements, the shaking in his voice, the darkness behind his eyes. “okay… okay. we won’t.” bob looked at you softly, shy, haunted by something, “i’m sorry. i don’t- i don’t know-“ you took his hands again, trying to pull him back to you and out of his own head. “i don’t think you would ever hurt me.” you weren’t there- in new york, in the void- you heard the stories. the horrors. but you just couldn’t imagine… even still. “i know you wouldn’t.” bob shook his head, “i wouldn’t. but you weren’t the one i wanted to hurt...”

a chill ran down your spine, breath catching in your throat. you shifted, just slightly- not away from him, not letting go of his hand. bob looked up at you with a sad expression, “i’m scaring you…” he jerked his hand away, expression hurt. he looked angry, disappointed, betrayed…broken. “no.” you ignored your pounding heart and the twisting in your stomach. “i should go… it’s late…” “no.” bob uncrossed his legs and was walking to the door as soon as his feet hit the floor, “stop. robert-“

“i’m sorry.” he shook his head again, posture deflating slightly, “i really am, i—“

you forced yourself to follow him, grabbing his arm, “robert, stop. i’m not afraid of you.”

bob stopped, his tense body relaxing slightly at your touch. he took a deep breath, turning to look at you over his shoulder; his eyes glowed behind his hair- but they weren’t golden.

“maybe you should be…” his voice was too deep, too dark. he tugged his hand away from your grip, stepping through the threshold, door slamming shut behind him; never once touching it with his hand. you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. it came out in a sob. you hadn’t realized you still had the ability to cry, after all the years of playing cold, staying unattached, acting like the bitch and playing the character that no one would miss– until the tears started falling.

you were in the gym before bucky or john, after not having slept a single second. there was an energy drink and a cup of coffee sitting beside your gym back this morning. you would either be buzzing enough to complete a record length workout, or you would get a quick shortcut to cardiac arrest. you didn’t have a routine ever, just moving to whatever you felt would get the most frustration and aggression out. you hadn’t realized it had been two hours; and you hadn’t realized bucky, yelena and walker were all watching you, wide eyed. the bag broke free of it’s hook, slamming into the wall as you swore. you turned slowly, sweat soaked and lost in your own head; nearly falling over when you came face to face with john. you flinched and this time he held his arm up in case you struck with your fist first again. “picturing my face again?” you almost laughed, the smallest smirk twitching to your lips. bucky whistled, eyeing the bag that now lay helplessly on the floor, “that’s definitely more like your track record…” you eyed him, almost appreciatively, but instead of thanking him you tipped your water to your lips and drained it, “i’m going for a run.” yelena didn’t hide her surprise, silently wondering how you suddenly still had the energy. you nodded to her as you brushed past, head still spinning.

there had been a moment where you knew you should stop– that you were pushing yourself too hard. it was after your stomach muscles felt like they were going to tear, and before your vision had started going funny. your breathing had evened out, body realizing you must have been in a survival situation and convincing your lungs they needed to get over it. your head throbbed, your vision danced slightly, black creeping in around the edges. every time your feet hit the ground, your head felt like it was hit with a baseball bat. you were nauseous, stomach now demanding you to stop or else. you finally did, bracing yourself against a tree, taking in a breath so deep that it hurt. you swore again, letting your head fall against the tree. you closed your eyes, relishing in the overdue rest. footsteps behind you snapped your attention back; you lifted your head so quickly you felt whiplash, “yelena,” you had meant it to be friendlier, “i caught up with you- you’re fast-“ she was out of breath slightly. yelena hated running so the fact that she came after you was a compliment. “you okay? you seem kind of…” she gestured to all of you and then made a grumpy expression. you would have laughed if you didn’t feel sick or in pain everywhere, “fine.” you forced it out, holding your side, “sure, right.” she eyed you with a speculative expression, nodding sarcastically. “i’m fine,” you looked at your watch, only mildly concerned at how many calories you had burned before eating. “bob is looking for you.” your body betrayed you by it’s reaction. you tensed, eyes snapping up to her’s, widening slightly, “is he okay?” yelena’s speculation only grew, crossing her arms, “why wouldn’t he be okay? did something happen?” you hated how she could read people. she was asking, but she knew. “i-“ “walker told me bob looked like he wanted to rip his head off while you two were training. does that sound familiar?” you exhaled, “we almost had a visitor from a certain shadowy friend.” “because john got too close to you and was touching you.” she was amused. “no.” shit. yelena was smiling just slightly, lips tight, eyes scrutinizing you, “because john was touching you-“ “yelena-“ she waved her hand, “whatever. i’m not going to tell you what i see.” are you sure about that? “talk to bob.” she jogged past you without another word, and you swore you could feel the smug expression on her face. you groaned, silently cursing her as you turned, preparing to walk back.

you had not, in fact, talked to bob. but you also were not going to avoid him. he sat next to you on the couch, half reading, half glancing up at you when he thought you couldn’t see him. he was fidgeting- badly- worse than you had seen him in a while. his fingers tapped against the spine of his book, his foot wiggled side to side, and his knee bounced up and down. he was practically vibrating. “bob,” you finally forced yourself to look at him. he froze, eyes widening, cheeks flushing. he had been shaking the entire damn couch. “is something bothering you?” his foot was moving again, “sorry- i’m sorry- i just-“ he closed his book, turning to look at you, “did something happen last night?” oh. “i don’t… i don’t remember… i feel like.. something happened? between us? or…” your heart sank but you felt as if you could breathe easier, “nothing happened.” if he didn’t remember there was no point in reminding him, especially when it was nothing. he looked at you, nodded once, but behind his eyes he didn’t believe you, “okay…” you smiled softly at him, happy there wasn’t this thing between you. “we didn’t um…?” bob’s fingers traced his chin, a phantom brush against his lips. you hated the way your heart leapt at the thought, “oh- no… we didn’t.” shit, it was like you were running again. “you would remember.” you hadn’t meant to say it, but the shy smile and blush on his cheeks was worth it. he nodded, slightly struggling for words, clearly trying to pull himself together. “okay-“ it was quiet, shy. he wasn’t meeting your eyes.

“are you… getting groceries later?”

it was grocery night. john had offered to go with you. you didn’t want john to go with you. you wanted bob to come with you… god, you wanted bob to come. “i am.” please come. “okay. i’ll come.” once again, your damn heart acted like a frantic bird slamming into something, trying to break out.

you had ended up sitting in the park, stars trying to flicker past the light pollution of the city. bob sat next to you, shifting a milkshake between his hands. you held your own ice cream, watching it melt in it’s cup. your body still felt tense, frustration and irritation pulsing through you; now mixed with something else. bob was watching you, silently, foot tapping anxiously, eyes fixed on you with an intensity that made you flinch.

“do you think they’ll ever fully accept us?”

the question hit you like a punch; leaving you feeling like someone had just punched you directly in the gut, taking all the air from your lungs and stolen your words. “i-“ you couldn’t remember if sentry had telekinesis abilities, but his eyes weren’t glowing, so maybe he was just thinking the same thing you had been. “no.” it came out as a sigh. bob’s expression saddened and you wished you hadn’t been so blunt. he nodded once, looking at his feet, “that’s what i thought.” the sadness in his voice made you recoil, cursing yourself for answering honestly. “i think yelena tries. she tries to understand and… include me. but i’m not like them. i can’t control it. i can’t fight… not without.. the other guy…” you felt yourself move closer to him on the bench, “i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have said-“ “no.” bob’s voice was soft, “don’t apologize. you’re honest. you’re one of the only people that have ever been honest with me.” you felt your heart swell at that, not used to someone appreciating your honesty. “i think they’re lucky to have you. even if you can’t control your powers… there might come a day when you need them. when they need you. one day it might not matter if you can control it, they might just need you.” bob looked at you again, eyes tracing your entire face, likely trying to figure out if you were just saying that to make him feel better. you wouldn’t do that. he knew you wouldn’t. you were the most honest person he had ever meant, even when it was harsh. you kept your eyes locked on his own, feeling that damn tug in your stomach again, ignoring the way your heart jumped.

“they should be happy to have you.” bob broke the stare again, shifting awkwardly, “you do everything for them… forget needing powers.” you scoffed, shaking your head, “anyone can get groceries and write things down, robert.” bob was looking at you again, sadly, “that’s not all you do. that’s- hey-“ he grabbed your hand and you may as well have been electrocuted. “look at me.” you did not want to. you were too scared to see the look he was giving you and what it would do to you. “you’re so much more than just their.. what? house keeper? manager? bullshit.” you looked at him finally, and god, it about did you in. his eyes were burning into yours, intensely, desperately, “you talk them down from fights, you defend me every time they…” his eyes dropped only for a moment, “you make me feel okay. no one has ever done that. yelena tries… she understands to a point… she- but not like you. you don’t treat me differently. you treat me like i’m more normal than they are. like i’m someone worth-“ bob’s jaw clenched and unclenched and you swore if he started crying you would really be out for the count, “i’ve never had that. you make it all okay. for all of us… they all respect you. they don’t say it… they should say it. but you’re so much more than just their housekeeper.” you weren’t completely buying all of it, but you nodded, “i’m glad i mean something to you too.” you hadn’t meant to say that. bob’s eyes snapped up again, listening, clinging to you with his eyes so he didn’t miss a single thing you said. “you-“ you looked away now, not able to handle the intensity and passion behind his eyes, “i’ve never been good for anyone. it’s usually just screw ups and getting people close to me killed.” bob had stood up now, “that was an accident—“ you shook your head, begging the tears to go away, “it wasn’t.” bob had seen it. in the void, in your shame room. he was there, but he still didn’t understand it. “you were a child. trained- manipulated… to be…” he was kneeling in front of you now, eyes locked on you like you were the only thing in the world. “i killed her, robert.” his hands found your knees, resting on them, trying to pull you back to him, despite still being scared to touch you, “stop.” his voice was pleading. “they told me if i went out there and found her and lured her back, i wouldn’t have to kill her. as long as i showed them i was strong enough to act on it-“ you couldn’t feel his fingers grip your knees tighter, “they promised… then they shot her.”

his hands moved to your wrists, holding them, pleading with you to look at him. he knew all about spiraling. about getting lost in your darkest thoughts and getting pulled down. he wouldn’t let that happen to you. he couldn’t watch you relive it again. “look at me.” warmth against your hands pulled you to him, bleary eyed, mind still far away. his eyes glowed a gentle golden, locked on you, not aware of anything else around him. “that wasn’t you.” “i should have just grabbed her and run-“ it came out as a sob and you wished you were just alone, that he wasn’t here to see you like this. “i’m not going anywhere.”

right, mind reading…

“you both would have died, then and you wouldn’t be here. and god, i don’t want a world where that’s the case.” your eyes snapped to his at that and you became aware of how close he was, then. of how he was looking at you, of his hands in your own, of the fact that he was kneeling between your knees. “i—“ he was slightly out of breath; you didn’t know if he was dizzy from your closeness, if he was using his powers to calm you and if it was draining him. or if it was something else. if it was the same feeling you had, a heat in your stomach, the lightheadedness, the roaring in your ears, the tension in you that begged to just be let out… the absolute desperation and need you felt for him that could no longer be ignored and shoved down.

his lips were on you, then; hungry and messy. you gasped as your hands found his hair, fingers tangling in it, pulling him further into you. his breath shook as he took a deep breath against you. “wait, i’m—“ bob’s hands shook slightly, eyes glowing brighter than the stars above you, “i can’t control-“ he was fighting to pull himself away from you, fists clenched as they shook. “i’m sorry-“ you found his lips again and he didn’t protest. his entire body was warm, radiating like a furnace against you. he melted into you, body trembling slightly, fingers shaking as they traced the outline of your shirt. your breath caught, the feel of his finger tips against the skin on your hips making your head spin. bob’s full weight was against you, practically sitting on your lap, melting into you, losing himself against you. his fingers traced your shirt, tugging up slightly on the fabric. “robert-“ you were breathless, lost in him, but also very aware you were on a public bench. “robert-“ you pushed him gently, almost laughing at his dazed expression and light drool on his lips. his eyes still glowed, but there was a darkness behind them. his nose brushed against yours, breathless, tilting his head just slightly to reach your lips, “robert, we’re still in public-“ you exhaled shakily, tilting just slightly out of ready of him. “right,” he breathed out, face reddening, expression still dazed.

bob shifted off you, groaning slightly, pouting as he did. “‘m sorry,” he smiled stupidly, grinning at you like he had just won the entire world. “don’t be sorry for that.” you smirked at him, letting him help you to your feet. god, he made your head spin. he dropped the groceries in the back of your car, climbing in the passenger seat with a sleepy smile. “so… home then.” he sounded disappointed; you felt it… “everyone might be asleep…” bob met your dangerous expression, “or gone…” bob placed a torturous hand on your knee as you put the car in drive.

you put groceries away with shaking hands, fully aware of how bob was looking at you like you were his next meal. he was reading from the couch, but his eyes were above the book, watching your every move. the others were either asleep or not home- you didn’t know, and you didn’t really care. you placed the final box of cereal in the pantry and turned around just to be nose to nose with bob. you exhaled, cursing your legs for growing weak. “i would like to finish what we started.” your breath caught, not at all used to bob being forward and confident. all you could do was nod, feeling pathetic and dizzy. he followed you to your room, watching with hungry eyes as you locked the door behind you. he sat on your bed, eyes softening as you joined him. “i don’t..” he hesitated as your hands found the bottom of his sweatshirt, “please don’t turn away…” your heart caught in your throat as he pulled his shirt over his head, hands gently placed over your own. your eyes dropped, shamelessly, to his ridiculous and dangerous abs. “turned off?” bob almost laughed, “i didn’t say turned off,” his shirt still lay around his neck, arms still in the sleeves, “that’s not what i was talking about…” you held your breath as he pulled his shirt over his head, pulling his arms out of the sleeves. you were still admiring his abs when his arm came to rest against you. your breath caught, choking on the air in your nose, “bob-“ “no…” his voice was quiet, he was no longer meeting your eyes, “please don’t treat me different now. you always call me robert. call me robert…” your eyes followed the numerous lines on his arms, not hearing him as tears filled your eyes. “bob, i-“ he was looking at you, guilty, broken, embarrassed, “please don’t treat me differently, i- they’re old.. most of them are old, they- i haven’t in a long time-“ you were already crying though, not sure how he could expect you not to react at all. to this. to him doing this. “i’m-“

“i’m sorry. i should have warned you, i-“

“why are you sorry?” your voice was flat, void of the usual softness it held towards him, shaking slightly, “why are you apologizing? i- i’m sorry you ever thought- i’m sorry it was bad enough that you-“ bob was looking at you again, still guilty, still trying to hold up his walls for you. you squeezed both his hands, trying to get the tears to stop, “if i had been there-“ bob actually laughed then, “you would have hated me back then.” he tilted your head up to look at him, “god knows i did…” you wiped at your eyes, hating that he was once again seeing you cry, but happy it was at least over him this time, “you promise you’ve stopped? completely?” bob nodded, looking at you shamefully, “i’m better now….. i- i didn’t want you to find out like this. i’m sorry. i didn’t think you would ever see them…”

you bit your lip, stroking his arms with the softest touch, “i’m sorry you thought you deserved this. you didn’t. no matter what you did.” bob’s eyes were on your face, even as your own traced up and down his arms, as your fingers ran gently along the uneven skin. bob was holding his breath, truly feeling like he could cry; knowing he had never felt such a gentle touch- especially on the darkest, most gruesome scars of his past. “i think i’m in love with you.”

you nearly tumbled right off the bed. you were sure your face reflected your shock, but hopefully not the way you were currently fighting for air. “you don’t have to say it back. i don’t even know what that means, really. i’ve never felt it before. not towards me, or directed at someone else… but i know how i feel when i’m with you. and how you make me feel. safe… happy, normal.. like i’m not a freak, or a screw up, or a total loser, or a burden… just.. that i’m me. something i’ve never really felt in a positive way. not really. but when you look at me… or laugh at something i say… being me isn’t…the worst thing ever.”

shit, now you were crying. how could he say those things to you and mean it? he knew what you had done… he knew what you were. what you had trained to be… “robert.” his soft eyes met yours and the look behind them made you nearly break, “i don’t deserve your love. i don’t care what your past was like. you are good. you are the best person i’ve ever met but, i-“ “bullshit.” bob was in front of you again, “absolute bullshit. i don’t want to hear that again. if you can see the good in me, then why the hell shouldn’t you deserve love and second chance when the two times you weren’t perfect were accidents?” damn. he had a point. but still- he was bob. you would never hold yourself to the same standard of the man you loved. “that’s the problem,” he was smiling just slightly, a playful smirk on his lips, “is that you will never see yourself as i do. and you will never see myself the way i do.” oh, damn him and that mind reading ability. “look at me.” you did, shamefully, embarrassed, guilty, “everyone i get close to dies. or i push them away before they can get too close…” bob squeezed your hand, “lucky for you, i can’t die. or even be injured. and i have been told that i am extremely annoying and clingy. so good luck with that other part.” you almost laughed, wiping at the tears in your eyes. bob let go of your hand, exhaling, “you don’t have to say anything back. i’m not expecting anything. i don’t need anything to change between us… as long as we can still be friends and-“ he stood up, a soft but sad smile on his lips, “please just don’t push me away. i’m sorry. i’ll give you time. i’ll go… just… please don’t push me away.”

you grabbed onto his wrist, stopping him before he could walk away. your mind had acted before you were caught up with the plan. bob looked at you wide eyed, eyes slowly moving to your interlocked hands. his skin was hot, always much too hot to the touch, always much more hot than the average person. he looked to you again, hopeful, expectant. say something, stupid. say something before he walks out, or before he starts another anxious rambling. what if you said something stupid and hurtful again? you tugged on his arm so quickly and suddenly that bob stumbled against you. his eye’s widened as he landed directly in your lap, stumbling over apologies as he struggled to get off you. your arms wrapped around his waist, tightly, holding him against you. bob’s breath caught, tensing against your touch. you pulled him in by the hair before he could mutter one more apology.

his breath hitched, inhaling shakily against your lips. he closed his eyes as he reciprocated, hotter, heavier, with even more passion. your own heart jumped, skipping entirely too fast to be healthy. bob melted into you, his full weight sending you gently against the mattress. his arms wrapped around you tightly, fingers tracing your skin softly beneath your shirt. your heart leapt, breath shaking, silently wondering who lit off fireworks in your stomach. bob pulled you closer against him, lifting your back off the mattress. you could have passed out right then alone, but then his other hand pulled your shirt over your head, as he continued to hold you against him. your head spun. the pair of you let out a sharp breath at the feeling of warm skin against warm skin. the room was spinning as his lips found yours again, messily, desperately. the room buzzed with electricity- or maybe it was just your head struggling to keep up with the rest of you. bob shifted down your jaw, to your neck, to your collarbone. you shifted, swearing that the room was sitting on top of a frisbee that had been thrown. his fingers against your skin sent electric bolts through your skin, heat spreading through you rapidly. his touch was soft and so full of love. his skin against you, comforting, the heat building all the way into your stomach. it was nothing like you had ever felt. it was gentle, careful, protective. nothing like hands that had been on you in the past; forceful, rough. no. you forced the memories down- refusing to ruin the moment. the perfect way he melted against you, the way he held you gently, but firmly. soft, but protective. bob was nearly gasping for air as he broke away from your skin. you would have smirked if you weren’t so pathetically out of breath and worked up yourself. he shook slightly, his eyes glowing a soft golden when he finally looked at you. “i’m sorry-“ he had a stupid smile on his lips, embarrassed, “too much-“ his hands shook and you were sure he was fighting for restraint, pulling himself together, not wanting to lose control. still, you grinned at him, foolishly and exhausted. “i’m sorry, i just-“ you stroked his hair as he collapsed into your chest, breathless and sweaty.

“too much…” he hummed against your skin, completely wrecked without even going further. completely lost to the world as soon as you started playing with his hair. “there’s no hurry.” you would have hated yourself if he did truly feel bad about needing to stop, “we have time.” there would be several nights of messy passion and tangled sheets. right now, all you wanted was to feel his skin against you, warm and soft- and his arms around you, firmly and protective.

“stay here tonight. with me…” it was not a question, but bob answered by pulling you closer to him, nestling your face into his chest, just under his chin. you breathed deeply, inhaling his scent, breathing him in. bob said nothing, breathing deeply, breath still shaky, holding you against him, “i’m all yours.”

—————————

a/n: this took me soooo long oml. im not sure i love all of this, but i wanted to post something and finally finish this since i started it june 7th😵‍💫

[isetfiretomyself]

Yandere Male Chef X G/N Actor Reader

This is my first request for a Yan online! YIPPEE :D I don't think I'd respond to questions again because damn it ruined my engagement last time. This took me way longer then expected to get done(⁠ ⁠≧⁠Д⁠≦⁠)Guys I need you to understand how long it took me to figure out how this guy was gonna lose his mind(⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠) - Jay

Trigger Warnings! Putting people in harms way, Unhealthy Protectiveness, Violence, Gore, Cannibalism, Tricked into Cannibalism, This Fic gets a little darker then my normal stuff! This is all fictional I don't condone toxic behaviour or crimes irl!

🔪Yandere Chef who worked at his families restaurant till he was 17. He was taught to cook with love and care! He then got the opportunity to learn professionally were he spent years working with the best of the best! It's wasn't about fun anymore it was about perfection.

🔪Yandere Chef didn't like people by the end of his training and worked out private work was so much more isolating then high class restaurants. He would come in for romantic dinners, parties, whatever, whenever. He didn't care.

That's where he met you. Wade learnt what to expect from certain clients. Influences usually want small appetizers for parties, athletes want meals they can heat up but you. Actor's usually want a show piece for events, you just wanted your favourite meal alone on your birthday. How bizarre?

🔪Yandere Chef knocked at your penthouse. You opened the door. "Hiya! You're here!" Wade isn't used to people talking so excitedly around him. It reminds him of his childhood before yelling negatively was what ingrained into him. He didn't really like having these feelings brought up in him.

🔪Yandere Chef was lead to your kitchen where you had all the ingredients neatly laid out, cute. What surprised him more was when you sat opposite him elbows on the counter. "You don't need to be about. I won't burn your kitchen down." "Oh! I know! I just wanted to keep you company! If I'm allowed?"

🔪Yandere Chef was taken aback. "Who am I to deny you on your birthday?" He was so curious about you that for the first time he questioned a client. "Why are you alone on your birthday?" "Oh! I prefer being on my own!" "Amen to that." He mumbles while focusing on the meal.

He plated your meal and to his surprise you ate all of it. If it's one thing he's learnt from celebrities is that they never eat everything. Something about being "humble" or not being "greedy", whatever it's insulting to see the food he spends hours cooking get only half ate.

"This is so good! You're so talented!" You were so excited over his food it threw him off guard.

🔪Yandere Chef felt a little embarrassed. He's not had so much praise since he was a child. He was more thrown of guard when you tried tipping him on your birthday. "You don't need to do that." He tried resisting but you wouldn't let it happen. "Please, I really, really want to! I haven't had such a delicious meal in a while!"

Wade went home looking going through the cash you gave him. Most of the time celebrities pre pay, completely ignore him and send him on his way. On a bad day he'll actively hear people negatively talk about his food. You were so happy it was such a harsh contrast.

🔪Yandere Chef was hired for a house warming party. Some rich actor wanting show off his mansion. He was there hours early making appetizers because none wants a real meal anymore. He had everything set up and was about to leave and till his client stood in his pathway.

"Listen it's totally optional but you're hard to get and I think if you showed your face it'd be pretty cool. I mean you're notoriously hard to get and I did give you a generous tip."

That's how Wade ended up with swirling red wine around in a glass, sat on an expensive sofa debating if he should stain it. He had people come up to him mainly trying to hire him or trying to get gossip on his prior clients. He was going to leave when he hears someone from the other side of the room. "Oh my! Wade! Hiya!" You come rushing over. "I thought you made the food, it's so delicious!" Then like a proud parent you dragged him around telling everyone how good the food is and how they should try it. It was so embarrassing!

🔪Yandere Chef was leaning on a wall watching you talk to others. Why does he always feels so embarrassed around you? That's when your laugh brought a realisation within him. You're so pure in such a vile industry. You remind him of his family restaurant, where there was hard work but joy in his creations.

Wade noticed the way some of the others side eyed you. He felt a scoff come from his throat, they were so stuck up, it irritates him.

🔪Yandere Chef takes his hands in yours. "Would you want me to make you another meal? This one's on me." The host's visitors were all shocked. Behaviour like this wasn't common! He noticed the eyes on you made you embarrassed. "I don't mind..." You mumble.

🔪Yandere Chef was making something for you in your kitchen. He was actually trying to engage with you this time. "So." Wade said cutting up vegetables. "You're an actor but you get nervous at parties, why?" He watches you trace circles in your counter. "I don't know...I was a child actor so I suppose it's all I've known." His face hardens.

🔪Yandere Chef thinks you deserve better. I mean you're a good actor but you're better then acting in his eyes. "How many movies have you been in then?" "Didn't you look me up?" "No?" Everything went silent. You had lunged forward over the counter and hugged him. "You're the first person not to goggle me in a while..." You mumbled into his shoulder.

Now the two of you had a sort of alliance or whatever. You called it a friendship.

🔪Yandere Chef was cooking for some rich couple while they were watching TV in the living room. He didn't mind, the women was sweet but the man was cold. He's glad they left him alone. He could faintly hear the TV when your voice was on the screen. Must of been a show or movie you were in.

Wade felt himself smile when he can hear your faint voice from the screen. That's when he can hear his client being rude about your appearance.How dare they!?

🔪Yandere Chef was following a recipe from the husbands descendants. The ink was smudged already in some places so what if he smudged the part on how much spice he was suppose to put in the meal?

It was too spicy. The couple started yelling at him. But he simply pointed at the recipe he followed. By the end the couple was apologising to him completely unaware Wade was in fact to blame.

🔪Yandere Chef didn't like people who were rude to his friends. And you were his friend now. You said so.

🔪Yandere Chef started hanging out with you more and realised maybe he didn't hate all rich people. (Acting like he isn't yk...rich)You were so down to earth. Wade had you round his house watching movies when and advert for your show came on.

You cringed leaning on wades chest to hide your face. "Mute it! Mute it!" You cried. "Seriously you don't need to act." He rubbed the side of your arm. "I just don't want to feel useless.." That's when it hit him, the best idea he ever had in his entire life.

🔪Yandere Chef opened a restaurant! The famous private chef opening up a small restaurant in a busy part of the city. He had the help from his business friend (Yandere Ex Wife cough cough) to insure it.

🔪Yandere Chef needed your help. Well need is a strong word. It gave you a reason not to act, helping your friend! The more you helped, the closer you two got, the closer you two got, the stronger he's feelings for you grew. Manifesting into someone more sinister.

Who complemented him it never meant anything compared to you. You would come in to help the chef's to clean the kitchen after the shifts sometimes too! Aren't you a cutie?

🔪Yandere Chef was opening up early in the morning. Putting his keys into the door but before turning he hears your voice. "Wade! I'm on my way to a magazine shoot but I made you something!" You show a box of homemade sweet treats. "Don't eat them Infront of me...I don't want to know what a renowned chef thinks of my online recipes!" He watches you run off. He hates that your still in the public eye. So casually complacent with your discomfort because what if the change is worse than the norm?

🔪Yandere Chef sat in an empty booth of his restaurant before his employees came in. He opened the box and to see cookies, brownies and sorts. He bites into one. It was so average but tasted so good. Thick tears run down his face, splattering against the table. He's never been the one served food before. Since he was a child he always cooked his food and dinner. Unprovoked act of kindness was something that hit him in a sensitive spot.

🔪Yandere Chef kept working and till he heard you had came to visit. As much as he complains about you being in the public eye but you haven't done any acting since he opened his restaurant, I suppose Wade's plan sort of worked.

Wade walked through. He was going to ask you round his, he as many times before but this time it romantic. He wants you, He needs you to be his. He see's your gorgeous face but before he can talk to you, A waiter has got your attention to try and flirt with you. This angered him. You don't deserve some dirt like that, the world doesn't deserve you. Nobody deserves you.

🔪Yandere Chef had staff stay back to help him clean. Purposely giving the guy trying to flirt with you a hard job so he stays back longer. "Boss, I'm done. I'm going to clock out for the day,Okay?" He turned his back not being able to see Wade pick up a meat tenderizer and smash it on the back of his head.

The lifeless body lays on the white kitchen floor. Wade had already turned the cameras off. The cameras needed to be reset anyway so nobody knows who came in and never came out. The servers head was caved at the back, a slight dent filled with dark red blood before overflowing onto the floor. "Disgusting pig." He said while spitting on the corpse. Wade took out his own personal cooking utensils from a tool box. Taking out a meat cleaver he slides it along the body's corpse angling it away from the corpse and pushes down in a sliding motion skinning the flesh of the bone. It reminds Wade of how his father taught him to handle meat while preparing a dish.

You were in bed, it was quarter to midnight and you were snuggled in your bed thinking about your day. You hope Wade likes the food you made. He was very supportive! Acting was something you felt like you grew out of and he understood that. You've been trying to stay out of the public eye since but it's all you've ever known. Maybe you could ask Wade for a job? Is that scummy? I mean he was so caring! While you were debating the ethics of asking your friend for a job, you hear a knock on your door.

You were scared a little. Checking your doorbell camera, you see Wade waiting there. "What are you doing here?" You asked, rubbing your eyes. "Midnight snack?" He ruffles your hair. Usually you wouldn't eat so late at night but Wades such a good Chef. It was a meat you've never tried before goat, horses? It was strange.

Little did you know Yandere Chef had feed you the man who tried to flirt with you.You didn't know is this is a morbid start to a brutal end.

[penelopehere]

How They Became Demon Hunters HCs With Huntrix

Rumi

Her backstory is partially explained in the movie, and I built my own headcanons of how her parents met in another one of my post

However it’s very clear that she was raised by Celine to hate her demon side, wanting to hide and even destroy it from a very young age

She was constantly pushed towards being perfect in every aspect of her life, whether that be in sparring, singing, social skills etc

This was all done in the hopes of eventually getting rid of her marks and protecting the world

However, she also thought that being perfect would make up for the fact that she was a mistake

Despite not knowing exactly how her mum died, I believe she would still blame herself; thinking that being half demon brought misfortune to her mum

In regards to her father, she just pictured him as an evil figure that managed to trick her mum and never considered the fact that he may have been a good person

She would also be homeschooled and sheltered for most of her life, any public appearances done purposefully in order to build her life as an idol

Because of this she would be put on a lot of korean variety shows and do interviews when she was a teen in order to get public support early

On the side, she would also train and even hunt demons with Celine so she would be strong enough to lead the next generation of hunters

However the feeling of loneliness would constantly consume her since she had no one that could understand her life as a half-demon, and she didn’t have any genuine friendships at this point

Celine would notice this and tried to reassure Rumi that this was all for the greater good, and that the hunters were all she ever needed

However, this only worked to a certain extent

Eventually though, Celine would introduce Zoey to Rumi for the first time

Rumi finally felt like she could let her guard down a little, instantly bonding with the other teenage girl

She still felt insecure about her demon blood, and Celine warned her to not reveal anything about that side of her so she wouldn’t lose her new friend

So Rumi stayed silent, not saying anything about her heritage even after Mira came to join the group a few months later

Rumi vowed to do whatever it took to protect the world, even if that meant lying to those she loved

Mira

Similar to Rumi, Mira would most likely also be a legacy

However the difference being that not everyone in her family had hunter abilities, so a lot of them had no idea what demons even existed

This was further emphasized by the fact that most of her relatives that did carry these powers were deceased or estranged

Because of this, Mira always felt like the odd one out and never truly knew what made her so different

She tried to express how she felt through her clothing and artworks, but her family- being rather strict- didn’t appreciate her creativity

They refused to listen to her, causing Mira to act out in many ways

She often spent late nights outside by herself, doing whatever she felt like

From this she would spot her first demon, sucking the soul out of someone until they died

She didn’t know how to react, not fully understanding what she was seeing

Once she managed to snap out of her fear she would go to check on the victim, only to find the body was no longer there

From there she would just run, not knowing when to stop until she subconsciously came all the way back to her house

She wanted to scream and tell her parents what happened, but the moment she walked through those doors she realised they wouldn’t believe her and that she was truly alone

She would carry this fear with her as she got older, not truly knowing if there was something wrong with her brain and making her see these things

Sometimes she would try to fight the demons she saw, rarely succeeding due to her lack of proper training

She had to constantly see people because of this, traumatizing her even further

One day however, she was listening to a song and began singing, not noticing the demon in front of her until it began to get repulsed by the music and ran away

She tested this out the next time she found one, blasting the song towards it while fighting

This is when she realised the demons were weakened by the music

She’d track down the artist of the song, eventually finding Celine in a fan meet and trying to see if she knew anything about the monsters she was seeing

She’d try to be subtle at first, not fully revealing everything she saw just in case Celine thought she was crazy

Mira got her contact information, and was told to meet her in a couple days

From this Celine realised Mira also had hunter abilities, and began to train her in secret

Mira’s parents wouldn’t care about her extended absences, relieved that their daughter was no longer getting in trouble with the police or acting out at home

Celine would reveal what hunters and demons were, explaining their history

Mira was skeptical at first

However, with everything that had happened, she had no choice but to believe Celine and for the first time in her life she didn’t think she was crazy

They trained together for a couple months before Celine introduced Mira to two other young teenagers who had the gift; Rumi and Zoey

From then on Mira finally felt like she had a family, and would do everything she could to keep them together

Zoey

Zoey would be a partial legacy, with only one side of her family knowing about demons and hunters

She didn’t know of her abilities at first, thinking all the monsters she saw as a kid were just a figment of her imagination

Especially since by the time she looked back, one of her family members would be there innocently waving and telling her to go play

It wasn't until she was older was it revealed that she had hunter blood inside her, and that she could begin training to become one

Zoey would be ecstatic, believing she was a real life superhero; wanting to tell all her friends and the rest of the family about it

However, this idea was quickly crushed as it was explained to her the importance of protecting their secret; not wanting to worry others with matters they couldn’t control

They also believed it would keep the non-hunter family members safe if they didn’t know about demons or Gwi-Ma

From then on Zoey had to live a double life, training and hunting demons in secret while also pretending to be a normal girl

This was exhausting, especially since she hated lying to parts of her family and felt as though they couldn’t understand her if they didn’t know who she really was

Then with her hunter relatives, because they were all older than her, she constantly felt like she skilled enough to keep up with them

Therefore she was constantly trying to prove herself to both sides, being the perfect kid and warrior at the same time

Her only solace was writing lyrics and using them against demons, feeling as though this was the only time she could unapologetically be herself

However, all these negative feelings eventually began to hinder her training, since she felt too alone and unworthy to focus on fighting

One of her relatives got the idea of contacting a friend in Korea, sending Zoey there to meet them

She was then introduced Celine, who empathised with her difficulties living a double life

Being an idol and hunter, she understood the difficulties that came with lying to those you loved

However, she assured that Zoey that her fellow hunters would always be there to understand her

For a while, Celine assessed and developed Zoey’s skills, impressed with how she could make her own songs in such a short period of time

She then introduced her to Rumi, the two of them instantly connecting over this feeling of loneliness

To Zoey, it felt like they were the only people in the world that understood each other

When Mira came a couple months later, they welcomed her to their small family

Zoey couldn’t believe there were others her age who felt the same way she did, and never wanted any of them to feel alone again

[fallenclan]

Okay I made a list of who I think are contenders for deputy, and I'll mention why as well. Please let me know if I've mischaracterized any of these guys.

1. Canarywish. Firstly, Canarywish was mentored by Ravenstar himself, being his brother Littleleaf's first kit. At just 9 moons old she had to witness the death of a loner that could have possibly been saved, if not for Ravenstar. This shaped her a lot, as she went from the "loving" trait to simply "charismatic" when she graduated a moon later at only 10. Canarywish suffered a lot at the hands of her uncle, Ravenstar, and would be a perfect successor to Wolfstar because of this. Secondly, tieing into the poetic connection with Ravenstar, Canarywish mentored Jaystripe, the only one of his kits who acknowledges who their father is and actually SPEAKS to him in the Dark Forest. Finally, Canarywish was one of the cats who was lost most recently, and in that time she lost her entire family. I believe that Flamefall will see not just her competence and need to prove herself but understand how much she's lost and what the deputy position could mean for her.

2. Ashblink. Firstly, Ashblink was Sleepydawn's mate. I feel like people tend to overlook him because of Sleepydawn's popularity, but he was very brave and controlled during the whole exile and break-up. Also, the same moon that they become mates, Ashblink teases his sister Sootstep for having a crush on Flamefall, which I thought was worth pointing out, although Sootstep ends up with Toadbelly. Secondly, Ashblink and Flamefall were mentors at the same time--to siblings!! Ashblink mentored Tallfoot, and Flamefall mentored Bluestorm. I imagine they had to have trained together, especially because the siblings would want to compete. Thirdly, Ashblink is incredibly loyal to the Clan. He has been scarred three times; by saving Brambletuft from a fox, the second time by an eagle, and the third time by rats. And yet he has persisted!! Fourthly, although he's getting older, I think he still has some kick in him and has the "valuable insight" trait to boot. The only reason he isn't first on my list is because of his age. Finally, as someone who grew up right after Flamefall and at the same time as Wolfstar, Ashblink is not just a respected senior warrior, but a friend of these two.

3. Bluestorm. Firstly, Bluestorm is the kit of Sandsnap, who was murdered by Ravenstar for being from Cricketclan. So, once again, Bluestorm definitely has a connection to our most prominent plot point thus far (and the reason Wolfstar is the leader). Secondly, he was mentored by Flamefall, which makes him a likely choice of successor. Also, he is eligible because he mentored Webwhisper. Finally, Bluestorm is still quite young and would be able to serve the Clan for many many moons, provided he doesn't have an accident or illness of some kind.

4. Ryewhistle. Firstly, Ryewhistle was mentored by Honeysong. This automatically makes her a contender because of the prophecy gang, but she is also Bluestorm's sister and therefore must have trained with Bluestorm and Flamefall as I said with Ashblink and Tallfoot. Secondly, Ryewhistle, like Bluestorm, also has a connection to Ravenstar through Sandsnap. Thirdly, Ryewhistle has the traits "ambitious", "prophecy seeker", and "good hunter", which are all excellent traits for a deputy. She also graduated early at 11 moons, which further proves her competence. Fourthly, Ryewhistle is eligible to be deputy because she mentored Fawnlight, who is also one of Ravenstar's kits, furthering the connection. Finally, Ryewhistle has had a good amount of time on-screen and is at a great point in her life to become deputy. She's not too old, but old enough to be experienced and trusted, and is mates with Batspring and Frozenfog.

5. Pearbranch or Greenberry. These two are together because they're littermates, and because we're starting to get to the point where it becomes tricky to rank who's more likely to be picked. Greenberry mentored Beaverfoot while Pearbranch mentored Bonestalk, so they're both eligible. This litter was the first to receive their warrior names from Wolfstar as well. I don't have too much to say about these two aside from that Pearbranch was one of the cats who was lost and likely gained knowledge and experience from that (and is known to be one of Beetle's favourites...), and that they're both qualified with strong traits and are a perfect age to become deputy.

Honourable mentions go to Graycloud, who mentored Swanspeck, and Clayshade, who is currently mentoring Hickorypaw. I don't have much to say about either of these two, but Graycloud is in a similar position to Pearbranch and Greenberry in that she's a good age and has good traits for the position. Clayshade is my wildcard pick. She's the youngest cat on my list by a good margin, and is only really included because she's eligible, has good traits, and had a scene with Flamefall at one point.

Wow that's way more writing than I thought...anyway, this is all just speculation and could be wildly wrong. I'm excited to hear what you think about my reasonings for my picks!

- ⚡️

oh how comprehensive.... let's discuss

as much as i love Canarywish and it would be really fun thematically, she would Not want to be deputy, and probably wouldn't be chosen even if she did--she's going through a Very difficult time right now, not only adjusting to her return to the clan, but also adjusting to the loss of all of her immediate family, so she's got a bit too much going on to consider taking on a responsibility like that. also! i will say that ravenstar was very good to her!!! he loved her a lot and she did love him, even if she was a bit intimidated by him at times

ASHBLINK.... man if it wasn't for his age he would 100% be my choice. he's such a fun and often overlooked character, not only to write but also to draw, and it would be so fun thematically considering he was previously mates with Sleepydawn. unfortunately he's not that much younger than flamefall is

bluestorm!!! i wont lie to you he was definitely on my list, but i think there's a few reasons he wouldn't be picked. for one, i think that it's not Bad but also not necessarily In Good Taste to choose someone related to the leader to be deputy (let's all ignore Maplestar. that was all me i wont lie), and also he's perhaps a bit too irresponsible for the position, but Man. i really like him and i do think he'd be such a fun deputy. i do find it funny that you call him young though, he's 73. time flies

ryewhistle!!! she was on my list too, definitely top 5, if it weren't for her relation to wolfstar there's a good chance i would have picked her--but also i think Flamefall is looking for someone a bit younger to take his position, and someone a little less rambunctious. not to say she wouldn't make a good deputy, because I really think she would, but I think her personality would give Flamefall some second thoughts.

both Pearbranch and Greenberry were also really high on my list!!!! Pearbranch in particular, he was probably my second choice. The only reason I didn't go with him was his age (sixty moons now! by no means old, but again I do think Flamefall is looking for a younger cat), but I think in terms of personality, Wise is one of the best traits for a leader to have. Greenberry was a little lower on my list because I think she's more likely to prioritize her own needs over others, not that it's a bad thing

Graycloud and Clayshade too!! both fantastic choices... Graycloud I think wouldn't want to be deputy on account of Her Anxieties All The Time, but Clayshade would probably do rlly well as a deputy!

[mikkomacko]

I need more moose content

Huffing and puffing, Moose trudges alongside Nico on the trail path, ears floppy and head heavy in the humid heat.

You told Nico that even getting up this early for a walk would be too hot for Moose and he’d insisted it would be fine.

“He’s a trained mob dog,” Nico argued, “he can handle a two mile walk in seventy degree weather.”

Seventy degrees on paper maybe but that paper would be damp and soggy with how thick the air is. The morning sun feels five times hotter, clinging to your skin and hair uncomfortably. Even Nico has slipped his headband over his head, pulling back his fluffy hair from his damp forehead and the shirt he’d been wearing when you left the house is draped over his shoulder.

He looks good like this. Skin slick and shiny with sweat, the sharp features of his side profile unhindered with his hair out of the way, and Moose’s leash looped around the taper of his waist. A proper dog dad and a sexy one at that.

“You guys are slow,” Alex complains, coming back down the other side of the path. On his roller blades, he’s a little taller than Nico, swooping a lazy circle around him and swiping at his messy hair before coming to the far side of you. Your boyfriend scowls, glaring over at Alex.

“Not my fault,” you reply, adjusting Nico’s headband band where he likes it before taking ahold of his hand. “We don’t have wheels. And Moose is overheating.”

You say the last part pointedly, side eyeing Nico who just scoffs and rolls his eyes. He loves Moose, you know that. But Nico’s love for anyone but you comes out aggressively. Usually in the form of wrestling the dog or yanking on his fur and tail, and sometimes it comes out in Nico being so proud of his specially trained pet that he thinks Moose can survive walks and runs in the heat with him.

“He’s fine,” Nico cuts in, defiantly walking a little faster. You skip to catch up to him, sharing a look with Alex who’s still lazily rolling by you two. In about two minutes he’ll get bored and zoom ahead, get maybe a block or two on you before circling back.

Nico comes to abrupt stop, yanked back by his waist and you pause with him. Eyebrows furrowed in confusion, he looks down at the taut leash around his hips, your gazes all turning to the path behind you.

Moose, panting heavily is sprawled out in the grass off to the side of the path. Nico tugs on the leash, jolting the dog but he doesn’t bother getting up. In fact, he doesn’t even act like he’s felt Nico’s urging.

“Moose,” Nico whistles, “come on bud, let’s go.”

His tail flicks dismissively.

“Aww Moose,” you whine, abandoning Nico to curl up in the grass next to the dog. He presses his nose into the bare skin of your thigh, presenting his heaving belly to you when you start to scratch at his sides. “He probably just needs water.”

Alex rolls over, shifting off his bag and digging out the travel dog bottle you have for Moose, and Nico comes to stand over you, wanting to be out of the way. You laugh when Alex awkwardly crouches down on his roller blades to present Moose with the bowl attached to the bottles spout. Moose perks his head up, rolling onto his belly and lapping at the water.

“Aw Nico,” you pout, “he’s so tired.”

Your boyfriend makes a noise of annoyance but you can see in the way he’s watching Moose gulp down water that he’s a little concerned. Lips pursed, eyebrows raised over this big puppy dog eyes of his.

“He’s fine,” Nico insists though. But a couple minutes later after Moose has had his water and rested, all he does is sit in the grass when you try to walk. No amount of Nico whistling for him, you calling his name, or Alex nudging at his butt gets him to move. Not even Nico’s German instructions get him to do more than tilt his head.

“Nico I think you broke our dog.”

He pouts, scratching at his beard in thought. “He’s not broken. Just tired, like you said.”

“We’re still like a mile from the house,” Alex points out, you and Nico sharing a worried look. A mile from the house, no wheels except the ones strapped to Alex’s feet, and a full grown St. Bernard that won’t move. “What if you gave him a command?”

Nico shakes his head. “No she can’t. His commands are for emergencies. It’s mean to use them like this.” He’s right. Moose only identifies your English commands with dire circumstances, ones that put him on edge and ready to attack if needed. To do that to him on a walk through the city when he’s already too hot and too tired is cruel. And when nothing is actually wrong, when he can’t identify whatever it was you wanted him to protect you from, it’ll just make him anxious. You’d be betraying his trust.

“Oh, makes sense,” Alex murmurs. “What do we do?”

Hands on his hips, Nico takes a deep breath and hangs his head for a moment. Then he’s slipping his damp shirt off his shoulder and draping it over yours, pressing a kiss to your warm temple as he goes. Crouching down next to Moose, Nico pets softly behind his ears.

“Alright Müsli,” he soothes, “let’s get ya home.”

Moose wags his tail happily as Nico wraps a strong arm around his chest, slipping the other under his butt. Taking another deep breath, Nico heaves the dog up with him, cradling him against his chest.

And well- it’s hot you’re not going to lie. The veins and thick muscles of his biceps and forearms flexed as he trudges next to you. Moose, eyes a little wide at being so high in the hair, blinks at you and you pet his snout.

“It’s ok Moose,” you coo, “Dad’s got you huh? He won’t drop you…right Nico?”

Nico huffs. “No I won’t drop him.” Satisfied with his answer, you slip your phone out of the pocket of your shorts, stepping back to snap a quick picture of them. Nico, pouting and eyebrows furrowed with the effort it’s taking to carry Moose. Alex behind him, smiling widely over his shoulder. And Moose, ears perked up happily and tongue hanging from his drooling mouth.

You fall back into step with Nico, beginning the trek home. Over his shoulder, Nico calls, “Come on Alex!” The kid goes zipping past you, languidly zig-zagging down the trail just ahead of you.

“You couldn’t do that,” Nico grunts to Moose, teasing. “We’d be a lot faster if you put those four paws to work.”

You don’t say it out loud, but it’s not lost on you that Nico wanted an early morning workout with Moose, and well now he’s got one. Just not exactly how he’d thought it’d be.

[do-you-have-a-flag]

i'm just gonna call it that we need to practice mindful tech usage and security and i don't mean screentime tracking apps and vpns or whatever i mean starting from early childhood and going into adult wellbeing culture to encourage tactile hobbies and long-form work and the understanding of online devices as commodifying the user with spyware

i'm talking throwback word processors with the same ergonomics as regular smart devices for general educational work and dedicated subjects for working with digital technologies so you have theory in practice and then applying that theory in a contemporary work context. that's where you learn applications, digital safety, and how to implement the generative tools. separately. once you've already developed the critical analysis and expressive skills first.

i have been basically addicted to the internet since i was 13, i've had ups and downs with it, but i've always had a little bit of over caution when it comes to information and identity online. i overshare what i chose to but i think the break down of privacy as a norm when it comes to personal data tracking is genuinely awful.

i like algorithms in some places but i do not think this super-customisation is worth this panopticon of tech.

have you heard about how phone locations can still be triangulated when the phone is off? this is incidentally why if you are gong to protests and you think you are in danger it might be best to leave it at home. but generally if you want to avoid audio and video being used to build a marketing profile you can just switch it off and pop it in a bag or the next room. but with fb trying to make voice command smart glasses a thing (after snapchat and google both failed to sustain the same product) it bears caution that so called wearable tech such as glasses, pendants, watches, earbuds, ect.... even outside of smart cars there's the risk of passive listening for user marketing profiles. we already have location based advertising, ads that track your useage to predict your menstrual cycle or life events, public ads that react to nearby phones

i am going off on this tangent to say that i am not naïve to the fact that we already have to constantly dig into 'dark patterns' of settings to opt out of surveillance and commodification. i'm aware that the easiest path is to do nothing and use the shortcut machines even when they don't actually help or save much time or effort beyond selling you tools that already exist with a new price tag. i'm aware that the plagiarism software with no idea what it's talking about and runs on resource wasting pollution and underpaid remote human labour that also gets slapped in every function role despite basically being fancy autofil and pixel pulp not only has all of those issues but the lay person is either unaware or does not care and companies only care that it is a new way to pretend they're innovating. i know all this just like i know that mass automation is just exploitation unless it is balanced with social structures for all that mean emancipation from the need for labour.

but while i think all tech can be used for good, facilitating human connection across physical distance, carefully trained data analysis on a rapid large scale, removing the tedium of technical drudgery where needed, just providing light entertainment. but we have gotta be better about legislating, moderating, and use culture.

use culture goes hand in hand with convenience. it's why vinyl records are still trendy, not only are they good at what they do, but there is enough cool factor that the inconvenience becomes a feature. CDs are also convenient still! but CDs do not have the cool factor so they get wiped out by the convenience of streaming. playlists in streaming have a cool factor that radio does not despite radio still being convenient. and remember no matter how much streaming claims you can pay to opt out of ads that's usually something that you get payment tiered out of eventually so the convenience facilitated by accessibility is debatable the longer time passes.

looping back to my original point, if we can encourage an understanding of digital privacy as something you shouldn't be complacent about, that you shouldn't have to pay for tools to get out of the spotlight, that it is immensely embarrassing to be too into exploitation by tech companies and make that the problem of everyone around you. user control should be synonymous with convenience. customisability/personalisation through individual control rather than passive scraping. you can still commodify decorative tech.

we gotta make slop and babying algorithm brained tech usage cringe. people don't care to hear that it's immoral so just make them feel uncool at this point. because it is embarrassing that you have the universe of resources at your fingertips and you're too scared to do anything with it other than beg it to put words in your mouth. who cares if you're chronically online or too busy irl to learn a new skill. you are like a little bird pecking at it's own reflection, that's sad. try saying something mediocre and honest. we gotta stop tap dancing into technofeudalism just because we're too complacent to actually talk to each-other.