#and in fairness she isn’t always to blame for this but also it’s super hard to remember to turn it off before I go up when I literally did | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

waywardxwords · 2 years ago

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This was so beautiful and so heartbreaking, @zepskies ♥️. First and foremost, I am so sorry about the loss of your grandmother and great uncle. I’m glad that this sounds like it may have been therapeutic for you, but I also know revisiting those old wounds can be quite painful. Sending virtual hugs to you, friend!

It broke my heart when the reader was really hard on herself and blaming herself. I’m with George, they wouldn’t have found the cancer at all if it weren’t for the accident. But I could feel her pain on that and understood why or how she blamed herself.

“Sweetheart?” he tried. You laid a hand on his arm.

“You still haven’t eaten dinner, have you?” you asked him.

You were able to capture (what I would call) a really big character trait in this glimpse. We have seen snapshots of it, but I feel like she doesn’t handle intense moments like this well (hell, I wouldn’t either). For me, my mind always goes to busy brain (which we see later in the chapter when she’s making lists and trying to tackle tasks). I really liked catching that view.

I also don’t blame her for being irritated with Dean. I’m impressed that he stayed calm. She has a million things happening—and like we’ve chatted about before—she has a hard time leaning on people. To allow someone in like that can sometimes feel like the most intimate action in a relationship.

The moment between George and Dean 😭. That about broke me. And hearing him talk about Sophie? Ugh.

“All right. Drive safe. Don’t hit any goddamn trees.”

Lmfao 💀. That line is GOLD.

The situation with Andréa stung, but I feel like the reader was totally not wrong. Given the circumstances, especially, I don’t blame her for being blunt and to the point. And when she picked up her purse and took it to the front door???

I love how Dean is unequivocally there for her when George passes. My heart goes out to him, because it seems like he’s doing a lot, but I also understand the position the reader’s in and she truly needs someone to help.

I really liked seeing Dean’s thought process on:

That’s a lot to put on just three months of knowing this girl

But when he really thinks about what she means to him, the thought passes. I think that’s super fair, especially for Dean who isn’t used to being in a relationship like this.

Well, well done. Chapters like this are hard, but I think you wrote it beautifully and I’m really excited to see what comes next ♥️

Smoke Eater - Part 11

Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader

Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but he’s also known to break a few hearts. He’s starting to crave something he’s never had, though. Something stable. Something real.

That’s when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.

🔥Series Masterlist

Word Count: 5,400 Tags/Warnings: Major angst warning. But also major hurt/comfort.

Part 11: “Heart of the Home”

You sat very still.

Your hands were gripped together in your lap when the doctor entered. He was tall and lean and blonde, and he would’ve reminded you of your boss, except this man had a kinder face.

You were sitting on the edge of your grandfather’s bed, hoping the doctor would say the bloodwork and scans came back fine. That they wouldn’t need to admit George into the hospital for further testing. That he could go home in the morning.

But your life had never been quite that easy.

“Okay, George. I’m sorry, but we need to admit you,” said the doctor.

He explained that while the malignant tumor of his cancer had been removed last year, the scans that had been done last month hadn’t been able to detect the bright spots now formed on George’s lungs and lymph nodes.

The oncologist would have to confirm, but you all knew where this was headed. Likely those “bright spots” were tumors.

George nodded slowly at first, taking it all in. He asked what his options were, as far as treatment.

“Your oncologist will go over those options with you,” the doctor replied. “We’re going to move you up to Oncology shortly.”

George thanked him.

And you sat very still.

A hand fell on your arm, finally earning your gaze. George’s face was oddly calm, though the worry in his eyes was for you. You realized that he’d gently called your name, though you hadn’t heard him. Your ears were ringing.

His mouth parted to tell you something, but nothing came out. So instead, he tugged you into his arms, and he heaved a long sigh.

“I guess we’re here again,” he admitted. He let out a chuckle. “The Lord does like his tests…but maybe that car accident was a blessing in disguise, huh?”

You heard his voice, but your mind was buzzing—mainly with the doctor’s words, and with a bone-deep feeling that threatened to consume you.

Your car, your fault. Options, again. Here again.

Your fault.

When you didn’t answer, George pulled away a bit to give you a questioning look.

“Sweetheart?” he tried. You laid a hand on his arm.

“You still haven’t eaten dinner, have you?” you asked. Neither had you, for that matter. “I’ll get us something that isn’t rubbery turkey.”

George blinked at you, confused, with a growing edge of worry.

“Isn’t Dean getting your meds? Why don’t you wait for him to—”

“I’m fine,” you said, already getting up to grab your purse. “I’ll be back.”

George called your name again, but the ringing in your ears was now pulsing in time with your heartbeat.

You made your way down the hall to the lobby at a brusque clip, even with your neck brace on. You didn’t see Dean, but he certainly saw you as he was walking back into the hospital. Frowning, he followed and called out to you.

You slowed when you saw him, and he soon caught up with you. He rested a hand on your back.

“Hey, where you goin’?" he asked.

“We haven’t eaten in a while. I’m going to the cafeteria,” you said. Though you seemed distracted, your eyes meeting his only briefly. It triggered a small spidey sense running up Dean’s spine.

He gave you your prescription pain medication, which you took with a small “thank you.”

“Everything okay?” he asked. “How’s George doing?”

“Fine. He’s resting,” you said. And by the look of you, that seemed to be true. But he spotted the tremble in your hands when you took the pill bottle package from him. It made him stop you when you tried to keep walking down to the cafeteria.

“Okay, you wanna run that by me again?” Dean asked.

You frowned, and your brows knit together. “What?”

“Is there something going on?” he pressed.

You sighed, but you didn’t answer him. You looked exhausted, and like you’d rather swallow your own tongue than speak. You shook your head and laid a hand on his wrist.

“I’m fine. Dean, thank you for everything you did tonight, but you still have to work tomorrow. Go home, get some rest,” you said.

You turned from him again. That was your first mistake. He reached out and grasped your hand to stop you.

“Hey, wait a minute,” he said.

“What?” you said in irritation. Your second mistake was not being able to look at him.

Dean was frowning in earnest now. Worry clawed in his gut, which was also telling him not to let you walk away from him. His grip shifted to hold both of your arms and move directly in front of you. He dipped his chin, trying to get you to meet his eyes.

“Come on, sweetheart,” he said gently. “I need you to talk to me.”

You inhaled a shuddering breath. A wave was rising inside you, threatening to pull you into its undertow. Your eyes burned, red and shining. Dean finally saw it when you raised your head, what little you could. Your mouth began to quiver, looking into his eyes. And it was done.

You could no longer be still.

Dean held you when you fell apart in the hallway.

Dean called out of work the next day to stay with you and George. Gordon would be acting Lieutenant until his next shift, and Dean was sure the man would take full enjoyment out of it.

He couldn’t care about that right now though. He felt that his place was here, being your quiet wall of support while you and George and the oncologist talked about treatment options.

“Normally, at the stage we’re in, I would be recommending chemotherapy,” said Dr. Benton.

“Normally?” you echoed.

“At the rate this is progressing, the treatment would have to be aggressive,” he said. His gaze focused on George. “However, at your age, and the current state of your overall health…at this point, I don’t think the rigors of treatment would be worth diminishing your quality of life.”

“What are you saying?” you asked. Your voice cut like a whip, earning the other men’s gazes.

George was the first one to lay a hand on your arm. “You know what it means, honey…he’s saying it ain’t worth it.”

“Of course, it’s worth it,” you retorted. With your brows furrowed and lips pursed, your eyes went from him to the doctor. “Just because he’s older, we shouldn’t even try? Is that what you’re saying, doctor?”

At that, even Dean drew closer to lay a hand on your back. Meanwhile, George squeezed your arm.

Benton shook his head gravely. “That’s certainly not what I’m saying.”

“How much time would I get, if I started treatment,” George asked, before you could volley further with the doctor.

Benton met the other man’s gaze.

“I’m going to be honest with you, George. You may get a few more weeks, or even a few months. But that is a best-case scenario.”

Dean drove you all home that day, after George decided to formally waive treatment. Both men knew you were angry in your silence, but neither one wanted to press you. Dean was too wary, and George was too tired.

Once he was settled in bed, you hadn’t even left his room yet before you grabbed a notepad off his desk and wandered into the hall. You started to make a list of things you still needed from the grocery store, among other things. Dean took that piece of paper out of your hands.

“Good. I’ll handle this,” he said. “Meanwhile, you can get upstairs, take a shower, take your meds, and get some sleep.”

You frowned at him. “You haven’t slept either, Dean.”

“I’m used to it,” he said, giving you a wink and a slight smile. Overnight shifts could be a bitch at a firehouse, but Dean was no stranger to having his sleep interrupted.

“Listen to him, honey. He’s speaking sense,” George called from inside his room. The bedroom door was still open. He was settling into his bed while trying to stifle a cough. He sipped at a cup of water you’d brought for him.

Still, you looked reluctant. Dean held your arms and pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“Come on,” he said. “You were in an accident yesterday. You’ve had one hell of a night. You need your rest, or you’ll be no good to anyone.”

And if you pushed yourself much more, he worried that he’d have to take you right back to the hospital. Dean would rather not have that scare so close to the last one.

He brushed your cheek with gentle fingers. With the limited mobility your neck brace provided, you did your best to look up at him. Your eyes were softer.

“Okay,” you breathed.

“Okay? All right, good,” Dean said. You held onto his jacket for a moment, leaning against him.

“Thank you,” you whispered. You felt the burn of tears behind your closed eyelids. A few of them squeezed past and slipped down your cheeks. Dean held your face, brushing the tears away with his thumbs.

“Hey, I’m here, all right? Just let me help you,” he said. “You can lean on me when you need to.”

“I haven’t had that in a long time,” you admitted. “Part of me doesn’t know how to lean.”

“I get that,” Dean said. But you both knew that there was a long and difficult road ahead. He knew he didn’t have to remind you of it. “Whatever you need, you just tell me, okay? If nothing else, I’ve got a strong pair of shoulders.”

Somehow, you smiled. You pressed your forehead against his chest and inhaled deeply, to steady yourself.

“That you do, Lieutenant.”

You left for your room soon after, but not before you brought him down to you for one more tearful kiss.

Dean then watched you climb up the stairs to your room and nearly went up to help you, but he heard George call his name. Dean ventured back into George’s room and heeded his beckoning hand.

“You hungry? I can scramble some eggs or something before I hit the store. I think I saw two more left in the carton,” Dean said. George shook his head.

“Come ‘ere a sec.”

Dean took the hint and sat on the edge of the bed.

“I just wanna thank you for everything you did yesterday. Everything you’re still doing for us,” George said. He looked exhausted, but whatever he wanted to say was important enough to fight off sleep. He clasped a hand on Dean’s arm.

“You don’t have to,” Dean replied.

George huffed. A smile made his eyes gleam brighter.

“I knew you were a special one, Dean Winchester. Knew it the night I met ya, on your very first date with her.”

Dean blinked, but his pause drifted into a reserved smile.

“How’s that?” he asked.

“Well, I’ll be honest. When I heard that black Chevy rumble like hell’s wheels onto the driveway, I thought I might have to worry about you,” George chuckled.

Dean’s lips quirked.

“But no, it wasn’t that. It wasn’t the pretty flowers, or our mutual love of killer sharks,” George quipped, making Dean’s smile more genuine. “It isn’t your job either, or the fact that you saved her. I just believe that you can see a man’s mettle in his eyes…and I saw it in you when I shook your hand that night.”

Dean took that in for a moment. His hand flexed over his knee. Then he met George’s gaze, though he didn’t know what to say. Sometimes though, honestly was the best bet.

“I’m sorry for what you’re going through,” he said at last. “I can’t imagine…”

George let out a breath through his nose. “I’ll tell you a secret.”

He pointed to a picture frame on his bedside. It was of him and his wife, Sophie, when they were around your age and Dean’s. The couple were sitting on a pier that hung over the edge of the lake in their hometown.

She held him from behind, with her arms wrapped around his neck. Her long hair was being carried by the wind, getting swept into George’s eyes. He was smiling too hard to care.

“I’m ready to smile like that again,” he said. He had tears in his eyes, but he was already lighter at the thought. “I know it’s selfish…but I think I’ve missed her long enough.”

Dean paused. Then he cleared his throat past a small well of something he couldn’t name. He wondered if his dad ever had thoughts like that.

“Well, I’ll let you get your rest,” he said. “I’ll be back.”

George nodded and gave Dean’s arm a squeeze. “All right. Drive safe. Don’t hit any goddamn trees.”

He shot Dean a knowing wink, and it almost had the younger man laughing. George’s sense of humor was something else.

Dean then left George to rest. He made sure he had his wallet, keys, and your grocery list before he left your house and went back to the car. He checked his phone and saw a missed call…from Cas.

Dean was reminded again about Azazel, the kingpin who might’ve ordered a hit on his family. Along with the recent murders and arsons, and the connection from one of the victims to your company, Savage & Co.

Dean returned the call as he climbed into the Impala.

“Dean. Everything all right?” Cas asked. “Sam filled me in about the accident.”

“Yeah, everyone’s okay…well, not really. I’ll explain later,” Dean replied. “Listen, about what we talked about at the bar.”

“Yes.” Cas said gravely. “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t go to your father about this yet.”

“Funny, I was thinking the same thing.” Dean sighed. “My girl just got some real bad news. I know you gotta keep digging into Savage & Co., but can you keep her out of it?”

“Is she all right?”

“Yeah, more or less…it’s her grandfather.”

“Ah, I see,” Cas said. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Thanks, man. I’d rather her just focus on what she needs to do right now, you know?”

“I get it. And believe me, we’re keeping the investigation of Nick Savage quiet for now,” Cas said. “But if we find something, or worse, if I can’t…I’ll likely need to question her. She works directly with Savage, and from what I can tell, she’s instrumental in bringing in and maintaining several of his major accounts.”

Dean stopped at a red light and took a moment to rub a hand over his tired face, rubbing his eyes. “You don’t really think she’s got any idea of what that asshole’s into.”

“I’m not saying she does. But in working so closely with him, perhaps she’s noticed things about her boss, and the company. Things she’s kept to herself, out of self-preservation.”

Dean frowned. He didn’t want to think about shit like that. It made his stomach churn at the thought of you working for someone who might be doing business with a crime lord, let alone Azazel.

“Well, when that day comes, give me a heads up, okay?”

“Will do.”

“Thanks, Cas.”

Dean offered to take another day off to help you, but you wouldn’t let him. He needed to go back to work, and you were able to arrange working from home for the next few weeks.

Even Nick couldn’t refuse to accommodate you in a situation like this. He knew very well that if he pushed you too hard, you’d go directly to HR.

So he backed off, and told you to take as much time at home as you needed. It allowed you to put him, and that afternoon in his office, away from your mind to focus on taking care of your grandfather.

Though you called your best friend the day you got home from the hospital, Andréa didn’t come by your house to see you and George until the end of the week. She cited mounting projects at work and some kind of tiff with her cousin Meg, but it all sounded like excuses to you.

However, she was gracious enough to bring dinner for the three of you on a Friday night. She cut up with George like normal, and even got him laughing, until a coughing fit forced him to stop. It also took most of the joy out of the rest of the evening.

While George went up to his room to rest, Andréa later joined you in the kitchen. You were washing the dishes, trying to focus on what you were doing. But your mind was buzzing continuously with future tasks and worries. Always, tasks and worries.

“How are you holding up?” Andréa asked. She rubbed your back, and you gave her a slight smile.

“All I can do is make him comfortable, for as long as possible,” you replied. There were tears in your friend’s eyes, but she dabbed them away with the back of her hand.

“What do you need? Anything, you just tell me,” she said.

It was a little easier for you to contemplate leaning on Andréa. You had been friends with her for years, and she was like another daughter to George.

On the other hand, asking Dean for help always made you hesitate. What you two had was still so new. You worried that this was too much for your relationship, too fast.

“Well,” you sighed as you wiped your hands dry on a kitchen towel. You didn’t exactly want to talk about it, but there were things you had to start planning, even if you didn’t know the exact timeframe.

However, as soon as you opened your mouth to reply, Andréa’s cell phone rang. She held up a finger to you and checked it. To your surprise, she actually answered it.

“Hey, babe,” she replied with a smile. You heard Benny’s deep voice on the line, asking a question. “Yeah, I’m still here. I’m probably leaving soon though.”

She continued her conversation for a few more minutes, but you didn’t hear anything after that. A tension headache was sharp behind your eyes, while anger (yes, anger) rolled hot under your skin. Your lips pursed. You busied yourself with straightening up the kitchen until she continued her call for another few minutes.

“Sorry about that,” she said, finally turning her attention back to you. “So what do you need?”

You put away the last dry dish and turned to her coolly.

“Nothing.”

Andréa frowned. She knew there was something off with you, but her furrowed brows betrayed her confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing,” you repeated. “Don’t you need to head out, anyway?”

“No, I was just…what’s up with you?” she asked.

“What’s up with me is my grandfather’s dying!” you snapped. You left her in the kitchen, precisely so that she’d follow you out. You grabbed her purse for her and went to the front door, where you stepped out.

Andréa was dismayed and confused as she followed you out onto the porch. She raised her brows at you when you shut the door and crossed your arms at her.

“I know you, and this isn’t just about that. What’s the problem?” she asked.

“You can’t seem to detach from your boyfriend for more than five minutes to just be my friend. That’s the problem,” you replied. “But why should I be surprised? Like always, you’re too wrapped up in yourself to consider anyone else.”

Her brows knitted together; she looked hurt by your words, but also defensive.

“How can you say that when you’ve been exactly the same way?” she accused. “Since you met Dean, I’d be lucky to see you once a week—”

“I call you every week,” you began, counting the list with your fingers. “You’re always busy, but you never give me a day that works for you. And when we do make plans, you usually cancel. Why? Because you’re going sailing with Benny. You’re going to a restaurant, hours away, just to try the new sushi bar beer garden, or whatever the hell. Or you’re going on an impromptu road trip, or you’re planning a summer trip to Greece. Give me fucking break, Dre.”

By now she was frowning angrily, her arms crossed. “You’re mad at me because I have a life?”

“No. I’m happy for you that you found someone. I really am,” you said. “But we clearly live in two different versions of reality. I just don’t have the time or the energy to entertain yours.”

You knew you were being too harsh. You felt incredible guilt as soon as it all left your mouth…but part of you also felt like a weight had been lifted off your chest. The problem was, you still felt heavy. Just in a different way.

Both of you were crying when Andréa left your house.

All too soon, a week became a month. In that time, Dean called you every day to check on you. He spent most of his evenings with you and George when he wasn’t on shift. And when he was, sometimes Meg would drop in.

She understood your argument with Andréa, and she respected you for taking a stand when you needed to. She even confided you that she’d had similar frustrations with her cousin lately.

But Meg wasn’t your only visitor. Ellen had come a few times to bring you lunch and dinner, even breakfast, though you hadn’t asked her to. You realized then how close Dean must be to his friends at the firehouse, along with the Harvelles; Ellen also refused to take any money from you for the food.

By the end of the month, George mainly spent his days sleeping. Pain medication made his days nearly painless, but not without struggle. You were doing your best to care for him while continuing to work full-time from home. You were also exhausted, though you refused to admit it.

Today was a better day, however, because George was awake. He was also more aware of his surroundings than usual.

He stopped you from adjusting his pillow so you would sit down on the edge of his bed. He took your hand in his, brushing a thumb over the back of it.

“I’m okay with this, you know,” he said. You pursed your lips, but he stopped you from whatever you were going to say. “I don’t want to leave you. You know that…but I’m so damn proud of you. Your Gram was, and still is…”

Your lower lip wobbled as you tried and failed to keep your tears at bay. They stung in your eyes and slipped past your defenses, down your face.

“The house is yours. But if that’s too hard for you, just sell it,” he said, heaving a deep breath. “It’s just the bones. You’re the heart. And you always have been.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but not a sound would come out. You held his hand with both of yours and stared down at them. Until his voice once again commanded your attention.

“I always thought…moving to the city ruined my daughter. That we should’ve stayed in Lebanon. That maybe I gave her too much freedom, and I failed her somehow along the way,” George said. His eyes were heavy with old heartache. And yet, they soon began to lighten.

“But the day we lost a daughter, we gained one too,” he said. Then, he chuckled a little. “And I know I never failed with you, sweetheart.”

That proved to be too much for you. He pulled you into his arms like you were still a child, and he held you for a long time while you cried yourself out.

Though he eventually spotted Dean hesitating in the doorway. He’d probably let himself in with the spare key you’d given him.

George raised a hand from your back and silently beckoned Dean inside his room. He was getting tired, drifting off thanks to the morphine.

“Hey, lookie there. The boyfriend’s here,” George whispered with a bit of cheek. You sucked in a breath and raised your head, wiping at your eyes before you turned around. Dean met you with an attempt at a smile and a gentle hand on your back.

“Just got out of work?” you asked. He’d been on a 24-hour shift, and you’d missed him. You stood and stepped into his welcoming embrace. He dropped a kiss on your forehead.

“Yeah. I’ve got the next couple of days off,” Dean said. He greeted George next and asked him if he needed anything.

“Just some water,” the older man replied.

“I’ll get it,” you said with a sniff. “Need to start dinner too.”

“I already brought some food. You like Italian, right?” Dean said, with a subtle smile. It earned your sigh and a grateful smile. He knew very well that it was now one of your favorites. Italian meatballs always reminded you both of your first date.

“Thank you,” you said, grasping his hand. He squeezed yours with a nod, before he let you go.

When you were out of earshot, George cleared his throat past a wet cough. Dean reached over and grabbed him a tissue. George took it with a nod. Again, he encouraged Dean to come closer.

“I’m not worried,” George said, between deep breaths. “You know why?”

Dean just stared back for a moment. He genuinely had no idea what the man might say next.

“Tell me,” he said.

“My granddaughter’s strong. Always has been, because she had to be,” said George. “But you’re gonna be there when she’s not.”

Dean considered the weight of that charge. The anxiety in his chest felt familiar; like the day he got his badge at the Fire Academy, knowing then the responsibility he held in his hands.

That’s a lot to put on just three months of knowing this girl, came a more selfish thought. It sounded a lot like the guy he used to be, not too long before he met you.

But when Dean thought about you, and what you’d begun to mean to him…

He realized that he only had one answer.

“Yes, sir. I am,” said Dean.

George gave a tired smile. “Good man.”

And that night, an agreement was made.

In the morning, your grandfather was gone.

Dean held you through what he thought was the worst of your heartbreak. But after that dour morning, it was like a switch flipped inside you.

In the days after George’s death, your shutters came up. You threw yourself into checklists and task after task—in funeral arrangements and planning and contacting distant relatives and friends.

This was your failsafe. Your version of “autopilot.” And these things needed to get done, after all.

But Dean worried when he no longer saw the softer side of you. Like your heart had been wrung dry.

He inevitably had to go back to work, but in between the demanding hours of his schedule, he tried to get you to slow down. He saw the warning signs of you running yourself into the ground. He just didn’t know how to help you land.

So Dean picked up slack where he saw it, often without you asking him to. He began fixing the house, one section at a time. He enlisted Benny’s help, since he actually had a small construction business. Dean even paid for the materials himself without you knowing.

And one sunny afternoon, he took a break from repaving part of the cracked and uneven driveway to grab a beer inside. You were sitting at the kitchen table with stacks of papers all around you, your cellphone on speaker as some kind of elevator music continued to ring on a loop.

“Can you believe I’ve been on hold with the funeral director for 20 minutes?” you told him in irritation. But you didn’t truly take sight of him until he came back from the kitchen.

He wore a familiar ensemble of jeans and black undershirt with a plaid shirt, rolled up to his elbows. He was covered in a fine layer of sweat, and his hands were dusty and stained from his work on the driveway. Dean looked tired, and that made you feel guilty.

Meanwhile, he frowned and popped open a beer. “You want one of these? Looks like you could use one.”

You shook your head. With a sigh, you hung up the phone. You’d try calling again later. Instead, you focused on the next item of your checklist for today.

“Food. Because we’re gonna need to eat after the service,” you inclined your head. “Okay, still need to come up with a list of caterers, because I don’t think I can cook for that many people.”

Dean nodded at that. “Let me talk to Ellen. She’ll give you a good price, and her food is good.”

You looked up from your notepad and considered him thoughtfully. You wouldn’t have thought to cater from a bar, but he was right. Ellen had great food at the Roadhouse.

“Okay, I’ll call her,” you said.

“No, I’ll call her,” Dean insisted. He set down the beer on the table and leaned his palms flat on its surface. “Sweetheart, I told you I’d help you with all this. You don’t have to do it by yourself.”

“Dean, you’ve done enough,” you replied. Your brows drew together stubbornly. “You’re paving my driveway right now, for God’s sake! This is my responsibility, not yours.”

Dean frowned, making you sigh. You leaned back in your seat and crossed your arms.

“Look, we’ve only been dating for three months,” you said. And in your mind, a good chunk of that time had been spent in the worst hell of your life. “This right here? It’s a lot. I’m not expecting you to deal with all this…”

You bit your lip, and your gaze fell away from his as your insecurities took hold. The thoughts that had been plaguing you every night since this all began, on the night of the car accident.

“And…if you’d rather take a break from us for a while, I’d understand,” you said.

Your voice was more collected than you felt. But that didn’t make it any easier when Dean stared back at you, mostly incredulous. You even thought you saw a thread of hurt there, and it made your heartache worsen.

Dean came around to your side of the table. He dragged a chair back and sunk into it, facing you directly.

“You think that’s the kind of guy I am?” he asked.

You immediately shook your head. You weren’t trying to upset him, or imply that he wasn’t reliable, or trustworthy, or whatever was running through his head. You were just trying to be realistic.

You’re so pragmatic it hurts, as Andréa had often told you.

“Dean, it’s not that…” you began, a bit helplessly. “I just—”

“Just, nothin’.” His chair scraped toward you as he reached out for your hand. He made sure you looked him in the eyes when he said this next part.

“I’m not leaving you with this.”

Your gaze met his, though you desperately tried to keep your heart from rising into your throat.

“I’m not leaving you,” Dean said. His tone, his eyes, his hold on your hand was firm.

For a moment, you stared at him, unblinking, even as tears swam in your eyes.

He’s not leaving you.

Not like everyone else in your life.

You were grateful. Too grateful, even, for words.

When you finally broke down into tears, Dean realized what an idiot he’d been. Your wall of stoicism had been just that—a flimsy wall. Now it was shattered, and so were you.

It scared him just how much, as he gathered you onto his lap and into his arms. You didn’t seem to care that he was dirty and covered with sweat. You clung to him strong, and he held you back just as tightly.

“No matter what I did, it wasn’t enough,” you confessed. “You save people all the time. I couldn’t save anyone in my life.”

Dean frowned. He cupped the back of your head, and he felt your tears sliding down his neck. His voice was thick with emotion when he was able to reply.

“Oh, baby. It’s not your fault.”

“I can’t…I can’t do anything. Anything that matters.” Your voice was a broken whisper. It damn near broke his heart.

“Now you know that’s not true,” he said. “I’m not gonna let you lie to yourself like that.”

You trembled and heaved with sobs, and he continued to hold you.

Just be there, Sam had told him, when Dean had called him from the hospital. Sam reminded him again last week, when George finally passed.

Is that all I’m supposed to do? Dean thought. His brows furrowed, but he tried to hide his frustration.

He was used to people depending on him. He led a team. Before then, he’d looked out for Sam all his life. Dean had never had to help someone get through this kind of grief though. He just wanted to help you, in whatever way he could.

Because he was worrying, just like you. That whatever he did, it wouldn’t be enough.

But he couldn’t leave you.

I can’t, and I won’t, he thought. So he took a breath, and he said the first true thing that came to mind.

“You’re the strongest woman I know, you know that?” Dean said. He spoke low and steady, but with the conviction he felt. “And that’s a tall order, considering some of the badass ladies I’ve got in my life.”

A smile tugged at his lips when he considered people like Ellen and Jo, Jody and Donna. He might’ve lost his mom, but he and Sam hadn’t lacked when it came to influential women in their lives.

“But I saw it the day we met. I see it every time we’re together,” he continued. “You work hard as hell. You take care of everyone around you…”

You were still quiet, trying to stifle your crying.

Dean let out a breath. “Man, if you only knew how much you’ve been helping me. Keeping my damn feet on the ground with this whole…arsonist mess my dad’s been investigating. Digging up the past, my mom, the whole damn thing.”

With a sniffle, you uncurled from him, just enough to reveal your face. Your grip on his shirt loosened, your palm flattening on his chest. He held your hand there and turned his lips to your forehead. He sensed that you were calming down. That you were listening.

“That matters to me,” he told you.

You nodded and tightened your hand on his. “Me too.”

Your voice was still shaky, but it sounded a little stronger.

“See? You might as well face it.” Dean grinned. “You’re a badass chick with a big heart.”

You snorted in response. Your lips even twitched at a smile. He spied it when he looked down at you. And you rested easier against him as your tears subsided.

“Thank you,” you whispered. He dried your cheek with a brush of his hand.

“For what?” he asked.

“For staying.”

AN: So first off, I'm sorry for the gritty "reality" of this one. It's just where the story took me, though it serves a purpose narratively and for both the reader and Dean's character development.

But also, I think this has just been on my mind, since both my grandmother and great uncle (brother and sister) died within a year of one another due to different forms of cancer. My great uncle passed in May of this year, and my grandmother two years this past October.

Again, I'm sorry if this one was too heavy, but art does imitate life and this was probably my brain trying to express those emotions I couldn't fully make sense of at the time. George will be missed, but will still be felt in the rest of this story, as I'm sure any of you who've lost close family members will understand. 💙

Next Time:

The identity of Azazel will finally be revealed in Part 12. But first...

You nodded. “By the way, it was nice of Sam and Eileen to come. And Meg and Cas.”

Dean smiled.

“They can be your people too,” he said. “If you want ‘em to be.”

You couldn’t help it. Your tears brewed and bubbled over. And you moved slowly across the couch to twine your arms around his neck. Dean’s lips tugged at a smile, and he welcomed you with an arm wrapping around your waist.

Both of you were still wearing the same clothes you’d been wearing all day; you in your black dress and Dean in his slacks and white buttoned-down shirt, though by now without the jacket, and the shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows.

You were infinitely exhausted. But one thing had become clear to you over the past few weeks.

“Thank you. Thank you for today, and for every day since we met,” you said shakily.

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Series Tag List (Part 1):

@hobby27 @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer @iamsapphine @simpforbuckyb

@vanillawhiskeyflavoredkisses @roseblue373 @this-is-me19 @emily-winchester @spnexploration @deans-spinster-witch @deans-baby-momma @iprobablyshipit91

@melancholictearz @nic-kolas @katherineann814 @sleepyqueerenergy @wayward-lost-and-never-found @thewritersaddictions @just-levyy @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @deanwanddamons @antisocialcorrupt @lacilou @adoringanakin @theonlymaninthesky @teehxk @midnightmadwoman @brianochka @branj19

@agalliasi @venicesem @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @solariklees @xsophianicolex @deansbbyx @candy-coated-misery0731 @curlycarley @sarahgracej @bagpussjocken @ultrahviolentart @chernayawidow @beskarfilms @mimaria420

#heart of the home #smoke eater #part 11 #dean winchester #firefighter!dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x female reader #firefighter!dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #waywardxwords reads #fic rec

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holocene-sims · 3 years ago

Text

next // previous

may 28, 2021 2:00 p.m. newcrest counseling center

[margot] grant, i am very sorry.

[margot] there are so many things i want to talk to you about but i want a few things to be clear, okay? the trauma of infidelity is serious and the way you feel is valid, so do not ever feel like you’re overreacting or that this should be squared away by breaking up with her. the confusion, the anger, sadness...all very rational responses to hurt. and these emotions and the relapsing, all of those things, are not a failure on your part. you haven’t undone years of progress in this moment. it’s easy to feel like a blip in healing is life-ruining but it’s not. you should be proud instead that you recognized the spiraling and were able to recover. it sounds like you knew you were hurting yourself and so you stopped.

[margot] and you should also be proud that you expressed your boundaries with päivi. i know that creating and enforcing boundaries is something you have a lot trouble with. you’ve talked to me about that and how uncomfortable it is for you to use your voice. i, for one, am very pleased with your continued progress. even though you’ve just gone through something traumatic and feel like you’ve gone backwards, i think you’ve actually done yourself a lot of good. you’ve overcome hurdles that have impeded you historically.

[margot] and the other important thing i have to say first is that it’s not your fault that she cheated. you don’t have an explicit explanation from her, so who knows what she’s thinking now or what she thought back in march. you don’t know and of course, it’s almost impossible to avoid wondering about it and questioning yourself, but you can’t subject yourself to that kind of pain. and why? why might that be?

[grant] i'll never figure it out and it’s a waste of my time and energy?

[margot] well, yes, that’s part of it. reflecting is okay but that isn’t reflecting. that’s getting caught up in it. you're right. but what i was really thinking is this…

[margot] you can’t subject yourself to that constant worry about what happened because, well, even if she comes to you and tells you exactly why and that reason is something to do with you in her eyes...you aren’t the one who cheated, so you are not at fault for the infidelity. cheating is a choice and it’s not a choice that you made. if you didn’t cheat, you aren’t at fault.

[grant] but what if it actually is my fault?

[margot] give me an example of what you think you could be at fault for.

[grant] um…

[grant] i don’t know, i guess...the first rational thing i can think of is what happened over the last year. i always want to blame myself and say it’s, you know, i'm a burden or something but i know that’s not fair to myself to say. that’s lifelong trauma talking. but i wouldn’t blame her and i'd get it if recent events were what burdened her.

[grant] you already know everything because i've processed all this with you but...you know, we’d been dating for a couple years, then i found out i have a serious autoimmune disorder and that i needed surgery and that it’d, like, take months for me to recover and i'd probably need supervision. that’s not something i could get in los angeles, not really. päivi offered to let me move in but we both knew it wasn’t going to work with her work schedule and what i needed. so i left, moved in with my grandparents, and so päivi and i were long distance until december of last year. in that period things were kind of a mess. i was not a super available partner because i was not doing well and she was having a hard time with life also. but our relationship was still really, really strong. or i felt like it was.

[grant] i–

[grant] when i think back, i can’t even make a case for that being the reason.

[grant] it was very stressful for both of us but she was the one who encouraged me to leave to take care of myself. she helped pack up my apartment when i left. she came all the way out to michigan by herself when i had surgery to stay with me and my family a few days to make sure i was okay. she was really supportive the whole time and she made it clear she didn’t have a problem with me being a little less available. and then when i told her i was staying here and going to find a new job here, she was okay with that and she said she would like to move in with me. our relationship got even more serious from that point.

[grant] and like i said, i knew she was also having a really hard time because something was going on with her work situation and she was feeling very homesick and even more lonely because she didn’t have many friends in america besides me. i tried to support her, you know? i called her as much as i could and checked in on her often. i used to send her, like, gifts or money for food to try and cheer her up. i couldn’t take her on dates, you know, so i tried to replicate it or i would tell her about all the plans i wanted make when i could see her again. i'm sure i could have done more but she tended to insist i did too much. but i don't know. i mean, last year was, like, the second time in life i've been at absolute rock bottom. i could have been too absorbed in my own issues.

[grant] but that doesn’t seem right either. i guess this being the reason only makes sense in my eyes if the stress carried over somehow, if she was lying to me, or if she has late regrets about things. what i remember from then doesn’t match up with what’s happening now. so i can’t find an obvious reason. never mind. that’s it. i can’t even think of anything else rational unless i'm missing something.

[margot] i know you want to blame yourself but you shouldn’t. even if you could come up with a rational reason, it just isn’t worth it to beat yourself up about it. if you did do something wrong to her or she was unhappy with the relationship, that is something to handle after you address the cheating itself and work on healing yourself. you aren’t there yet, so it’s best to keep that out of your mind as much as you can for now.

#ts4 #the sims 4 #sims 4 #simblr #sims 4 story #ts4 screenshots #hlcn: everything the stars promised #sorry for the long text but this was all necessary #holocene.png #holocene.docx #hlcn: margot #hlcn: grant

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dreamescapeswriting · 4 years ago

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Leftovers ~ HHJ [Request]

WORD COUNT: 2k

PAIRING: Hyunjin x Fem!Reader

GENRE: Angsty (kind of) fluffy ending

A/N: I hope this is angsty enough for you, I feel so out of touch with angst atm I need to get back into it! Also I made it Hyunjin as I feel I don’t get enough Stray Kids requests haha

Staring down at your phone you waited for the message you had just sent to your boyfriend to be seen but he hadn't been checking his phone for a while. You didn't blame him, he was normally a super busy guy with training and performing but this week he'd promised you he had the time off which meant he could spend time with you. The minutes seemed to be ticking by faster and faster with every passing moment and you could feel the stares you were getting from your family members. All of the anxiously waiting to meet the boyfriend that they had heard so much about.

"I'm sure he's just running a little late," You said as you turned to look at your mother, she had a worried look spread across her face as she looked at you. Today was the day Hyunjin was finally going to meet your family after dating him for the last six months, he'd never been able to come and see them thanks to his schedule and always being busy but luckily for you he had some time off or so you though.

Hyunjin: Running late, I'll make it up to you. Promise x Be there soon x

Nervously you turned to look at your mum who already knew you what you were going to tell her, she could tell by the look on your face that he wasn't coming yet so she clapped her hands together.

"Food! Come and get it while it's still piping hot!" She cried out to the house all of your cousins and siblings came filing into the kitchen, grabbing plates and heading to the table with the food waiting for them. Serving themselves as you sat in the kitchen window looking out of the window at the driveway, you figured if you stared long enough Hyunjin would magically appear with the best excuse in the world. It was this time of year when your family would come together to throw some gatherings, it wasn't anything huge but your mother would spend most of her time cooking and baking so that there was enough to eat that night and then for a week after. Sending people home with boxes filled to the brim with food, this was just something that she'd done for years. You had vivid memories of you and your cousins going to different family member's houses to do the same thing there too.

"What? No Hyunjin?" The voice of your cousin Paige rang through the air and it could have sent shivers down your spine. Although she was your relative and you'd been brought up to treat everyone nicely there was just something about her that made it hard for you to be nice. She was always making it out as though she was better than everyone around her, no matter what situation someone was in she would make it about her. It was as if she thought she was the main character in some kind of story.

"Drop it, Paige," Your mother warned her as she watched you tense up at the sound of your cousin's voices filling the room. Your mother knew that there was something between the two of you so she did her best to keep the peace but Paige wasn't going to just drop it, she'd been convinced that Hyunjin was someone you were pretending to date. Claiming that he was too good for you and that you could never get someone like him, going as far as to say that he wasn't real when your mother knew he was. Your mother was the one who had introduced you and Hyunjin, she'd been friends with his family for a long time and introduced you once when you were having breakfast with his mother.

"I just find it funny, he's supposed to show up when we're all here and then doesn't? Sounds fake to me," Your mother slammed a plate down onto the table making you and Paige jump, you turned to look over your shoulder at her and smiled weakly.

"He's a busy guy, eat your food Paige and be quiet." You mumbled as you moved away from the window and went to get something to eat instead of waiting around for Hyunjin who didn't seem as though he was going to be coming tonight.

"All I'm saying is, it's funny that he never shows up when we're all around and only you and your mother have seen him," You rolled your eyes at Paige as she said it. You were sitting at the adult table with her and two of your other cousins who seemed to be joining in with her on the whole "Hyunjin" wasn't real front.

"Why do you want to see him? He's my boyfriend," You stated as you pushed some of the food that was on the plate in front of you into your mouth. Trying to act as though you weren't bothered by her more than you were, but it was hard when she made everything so difficult.

"I just think you're bullshitting, there's no way someone like him would date someone like you," She spat out as she sipped on her wine glass but you just ignored her. She'd seen the photos of you and Hyunjin together why did you need to prove yourself to her in the first place. There was no reason for you to explain yourself to her or anyone else for that matter, your mother eyed you up from the other table so you kept your cool.

"He isn't dating her, they're probably just friends. Hyunjin could do a lot better than you." Paige got up from the table and went into the kitchen while you were left with your other cousins who just sat giggling at one another while you tried not to let her words get to you.

The end of the night came and Hyunjin was still a no show, with no explanation over a text from him either.

"You have to ignore Paige, you know what she's like," Your mother said as you slid your phone back into your pocket, deciding not to ask him for answers if he was that busy.

"I know, but she just winds me up so much and now I feel like an idiot because of Hyunjin not showing up-"

"I'm sure he just got swept up," Your mum calmly cut you off as you helped her package food up for your cousins that were staying for the night. Lots of containers were being placed into bags for them to take home the next morning. She always liked to look on the brighter side of things instead of always assuming the worst so she wasn't going to let you get into a small fight over Hyunjin not coming to a family gathering.

"I made him this," She slid a bag over to you and inside was a box of each food item she'd cooked, including some of the baked goods. The tubs all had cute notes on them from her, all handwritten with smiley faces on the top.

"Tell him to share with the others as well," She ordered as she pointed at you, she knew that if she handed over a box of everything all of the boys would get a fair share but you looked down at your phone when you felt it vibrate. His name flashing up on the screen with a short text explaining that he was outside the house.

"He's outside..." You whispered looking at the time, your mother nodded at you and kissed your temple, she turned off the kitchen lights as she walked you towards the front door.

"Make sure you lock the door when you come back in, don't be out there too late and put a scarf on. It's cold." You smiled as you took the bag with you towards the front door. It was pitch black and snowing outside, nothing except the security light was illuminating the driveway. Once your mother was upstairs you began opening the door as quietly as you could before heading out to see Hyunjin standing beside his car with a guilty look plastered across his face.

"I know, I messed up but-" You cut him off by handing him the bag of food and smiling at him, shaking your head as you told him that it didn't matter.

"Mum made food for you and the boys, she said you have to share." He took the bag from your hand and passed it through the car window, leaving it to lean on the seats as he went to reach out to hug you.

"I got caught up," You shook your head at him, you promised yourself you weren't going to make this into a big deal but you looked at him and felt nothing but anger about him not even showing up until late.

"I already look like an idiot in front of everyone, so you might as well go back to the dorms," You muttered as you turned to go back into the house but Hyunjin grabbed onto your hand spinning you back around to face him.

"You don't look like an idiot, I can explain to them that-"

"That what? That you got too busy with your friends to come and be with me?" You heard a snigger come from the window above the front door and you knew it was Paige without turning around. She'd managed to weasel herself into your head and fill it with thoughts of not being good enough for Hyunjin.

"I was working but I'm free now. I took more time off...I'm all yours now Y/n," He told you as he reached up to cup your face in his hands but you moved away from his touch, not looking at him as you began to speak.

"You should go I'm not good enough for you and I won't ever be good enough," Hyunjin began to shake his head violently as he heard the words coming from you, he refused to let go of you as he held onto your hand.

"Where is this coming from? I-I love you and you love me, I told you I would never leave," Memories of the first time he told you he loved you came flooding into your head. You were hanging out at the dorms when he blurted it out, promising you that he would never leave you because you were the one for him.

"You deserve better-"

"No, I deserve and want you." He cut you off, not wanting you to fill your head with the words you were saying but it was already too late. Your head was in a spin from everything Paige had been saying and now he was here in front of you, you were starting to believe it.

"You're out of-" He smashed his lips against yours not letting you finish the sentence as he kissed you deeply, his arms wrapping around your body so you couldn't pull away from him. Whining against his lips you wrapped your arms around his neck and relaxed against the kiss, feeling every spark and firework explode around you as you did with every kiss you shared with Hyunjin.

"I'm sorry," You whispered as you pulled away from the kiss and looked into his eyes but he shook his head at you.

"It's okay, do you still want me to leave?" You shook your head at his question and he smiled at you, kissing your cheek as he went back to the car to get his overnight bag out from the boot.

"Good, Felix told me to bring you some cookies so they're in the bottom of the bag," He chuckled, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and walking into the house with you. Both of you stared up at the stairs to see Paige staring at you, arms folded over her chest as she walked away with a pout on her lips.

"Who was-"

"No one you need to think about, come on...I'm still hungry and we have left overs." You giggled pulling him through towards the kitchen.

Tagline: @taestannie @kneel-begyourpardon @minholuvs @bisexualmess007

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thefanficmonster · 4 years ago

Text

My Kind

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warning: Swearing

Genre: Fluff, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Having been chosen by the gang to be a guest streamer on today’s stream of Among Us, it’s safe to say Y/N’s super excited but also a bit nervous. The whole of her anxiety gets lifted off her when she meets someone with the exact same vibe as hers - yeah you guessed it.

Requested by @monizzle96 Hi dear! Thank you so much for your wonderful request! I’m so terribly sorry it’s taken me so long to write and post it but here it finally is! I hope you come across it and read it and if so I hope you enjoy it! Love, Vy ❤

This has to be the fiftieth time I’ve checked my setup in the past twenty four hours. But no, I’m definitely not nervous, what are you talking about. Pshhh. Nah, being nervous isn’t in my brand. Plus, what do I have to make me nervous - a group of famous streamers inviting me onto their stream to play Among Us with them because they enjoyed my own streams? Ok yeah, that’s a pretty good reason. Not gonna lie, I almost chucked my phone out of excitement when I received that DM from Toast, telling me they’d picked me to be their guest streamer for today’s date. My stomach was doing somersaults for a good forty-eight hours following that text and then the anxiety slowly started setting in fueled by the expectations they probably have of me.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not inexperienced in the streaming field, I’ve been a streamer longer than some of the members of Toast’s streamer gang actually. But I never managed to garner that big of a following which I’m honestly quite ok with. I have a modest - ok, maybe larger than modest - following consisting of incredibly loyal fans which I will never stop being grateful for. They are all so respectable of me, my privacy and my boundaries. They know the main rules: no shit-talking in the chat or in any of my comment sections, no bashing other YouTubers in my comments/chat, and most definitely not asking for a face reveal. Fun fact: I didn’t even set up that last rule, they all just collectively know not to ask for it.

I’ve been keeping my brand pretty low-key to avoid garnering some unwanted attention - some of which I’ve already experienced on certain social media platforms following the full body pictures I posted on there - face not visible of course. I tend to also have my webcam on, facing towards my hands working away on the keyboard sometimes when I stream. I don’t know why people obsess over faceless content creators’ hands, but I appreciate the enthusiasm - it also drives me to do a manicure every now and then which ain’t so bad, self-care and all that you know.

Now, back to the subject of my ridiculous nervousness.

You see, it has layers.

I’m nervous of ‘preforming’ underwhelmingly and I’m nervous of what my own fans will think of the person I will become during this stream. They know me as a super chill and laid-back person, which I am by the way, but they might think I’m putting on a show if I exhibit any nervous gestures/vocabulary. I highly doubt they would, but the possibility is not letting my mind rest. And now that it’s about ten minutes till the stream starts, I’m getting doing my best to calm my nerves.

They are all just people. You know they are super chill too. Just be yourself, that’s why they invited you, because you are yourself on all your streams. They liked you for your personality, humor, maybe even your gaming skills. So chill the hell out and be yourself, damn it!

Easier thought than put into action that’s for sure.

I start my stream five minutes early just so I can vibe with my viewers for a little while before I have to meet the gang. My fans always have a way of injecting me with confidence, they remind me of where I was when I started and how far I’ve come. How much I achieved when I thought I’d be nothing and no one, someone the algorithm would simply overlook. But then they entered my life and I entered theirs and it all became much better than I ever thought it would get to be. I rarely tell myself ‘good job’ for the milestones I’ve reached or the hard work I’ve put into my content, but that’s probably cause I orient myself based on that quote from the movie Whiplash: ‘There are no two words in the English language more harmful than good job’ - simply put, I’m never satisfied with what I do and I always strive to do better. My fans, however, make sure I don’t go overboard with it - always serving as a reminder that I’ve done plenty for myself and others. And that’s what makes an amazing fandom, one I consider family.

Whoa, when did those five minutes fly by?!

Ah shit, here we go. Deep breaths, Y/N you got this.

“Hello!“ I say as I enter the Discord call, subconsciously biting my lower lip, grateful the camera isn’t capturing it. However, I make a mental note to keep my hands steady cause that’s the one part of me people can actually see and the last thing I want is for them to see how much my fingers are trembling.

“Oh hi, Y/N!“ Toast is the first one to greet me, “Welcome to the stream! Thank you so much for accepting our invitation.“

“Thank you for having me and inviting me, Toast. This is a huge deal for me. You guys are basically YouTube legends, this is unreal to me.“ I reply, cringing immediately afterwards because of my fangirl rambling. Great way to make first impressions, Y/N. Bravo.

To be fair, they already have an impression of you. Quit stressing.

Aright, you’ve got a point, me.

“Oh please, we owe all that to our fans. We’re really nothing special. All streamers are almost completely alike, we all owe where we are to the people who helped us make it there - our fans. We’re no legends.“ Toast says, bringing a small smile to my face as well as a light pink blush to my cheeks, “And from what I’ve seen, you yourself have quite the following. And your fans seem to adore you.“

“And I absolutely adore them.“ I chuckle, “They mean the world to me. They are the reason I’m here today.”

“Then we have to give them a special thank you, don’t you think?“ The teasing, familiar giggle, widens my smile - it’s Rae, “Nice to meet you, Y/N! I’m Rae, and, no cap, I’m quite a fan of your content. No joke, I binged your entire series of Resident Evil 7 as soon as I found your channel when Toast said he’d invite you.“

This rattles me a bit. I can hardly believe it - am I really receiving a compliment from an A-list name in the streaming world? My fans must be hella proud of me right now. A quick glance at my chat confirms that they indeed are. That in and of itself fills me with joy and newfound confidence.

“Oh Gosh, thank you so much Rae! That means the world to me. You’re all so sweet.“ I reply, lifting my ice cold hands to cool down my burning cheeks, my lips spread into a grin, my stomach filled with butterflies.

“Oh please, we have some real savages around here.“ A male voice, seemingly Charlie’s scoffs, “Don’t overlook us please.“

“Wait, we do?“ A deep voice, one I immediately know the owner of speaks up, “Who? How come I don’t know about that?“

I can’t help bust snort, “Nice to meet you, Corpse. Sarcasm central, I see.”

He laughs, “Just returning it to where it’s due. Nice to meet you too, Y/N. Sick Outlast series, by the way.“

Ok, wait, I have two A-list streamers complimenting my content. Ok, I’m bound to crack open a few beers to celebrate later cause OH MY GOD.

“Thanks! I’m a horror junkie so I’d be lying if I said I haven’t binge watched all your story-times. Personal favorites are the deep web ones, they fascinate me.“

“Oh, you’re one of my kind even more than I expected, huh?“ He replies, the tone of his voice changing, raising a bit due to what I can only describe as excitement and enthusiasm. “I’ve had people tell me it’s twisted, but I really like seeing the lengths to which the fucked up human mind can go to. Like, the shit I’ve read is insane! Some stories I didn’t narrate cause I would’ve probably had my video taken down, it was that messed up.“

My eyes widen, sharing the same excitement at the thought of digging deeper into this phenomenon, “Careful, Corpse, you’re walking a dangerous line of tempting me to deep-dive on Reddit in search of those exact stories.”

“No need.“ Corpse says, his tone now taking up a bit of a cocky note, “I still got them all saved, I can send them to you no problem.“

“Please do! I seriously gotta read them now. If I can’t sleep afterwards, I’m blaming you, Corpse. Just FYI.“ I say, giggling slightly, finding myself all but completely comfortable now. I wonder where all that anxiety went?

“Blame fully taken. Given that I’m not much of a sleeper, I’ll keep you company whenever you think there’s a killer hiding in your closet or fear a red room pop-up will appear on your computer screen.“ He replies, chuckling.

“Um, that’s oddly specific.“ Charlie comments, “Been there yourself, buddy?”

“Perhaps.“ Corpse wheezes, getting a laugh out of me too, “I will neither confirm nor deny.“

“You know what, I’ll just private message you my number so if you see it call you at some ungodly hour, you don’t freak the fuck out. Sounds good?“ I ask, already prepping to type it out and send it to him.

“Perfect. Wait...“ he pauses for a second, sounding puzzled for a second, “You don’t have mine.“

“Oh, do I not?“ I reply with a sinister tone - thought to answer the question, I of course don’t have his number.

“Oh, do you?“ He sasses me right back. “If so then you don’t need me to send it to you. Cool.“

Ah, shit

“Wait, no! I-I need to confirm it’s the correct one!“

Damn, never did I think I’d be complimented by some of the most important streamers on this platform, but to get a number of theirs too? That’s a whole another level that will take me time to process. But I’ll do that another time, right now, I have to kick these people’s butts in Among Us and later I have some deep web stories to read.

Turns out, all it takes to get comfortable in a new surrounding is someone of your kind. And Corpse is definitely one of my kind.

@maat-the-prescriptive @simonsbluee @save-the-sky @itsminniekat @hacker-ghost @bi-andready-tocry @imtiredaffff @jazzkaurtheglorious @hereforbeebo @fandomgirl17 @chrysanthykios @maehemscorpyus @loraleiix @letsloveimagines @annshit @i-cant-choose-a-username-help @enigmaticmaze @divine-artemis @waterlilypat @idontknowwhatthisisfam @evi-ka @classyandfabulous00 @redperson58 @lilysdaydreams @solowheein @mythicalamphitrite @axen-gers @luckygirl144 @nj01 @buddyemily @the-albino-lioness @stardream14 @gdhdkfnn @nomadicgypsyy @preciousskye @fluffysuicideunicornsworld @o-kaelin @manacharlotte @awkward-youtube-trash @lolalee24 @bonky-beerns @meme-lord-and-savior-sebastian @strawbrinkofdeath @teenloves @tams0527 @browneyespinkhair @starstruckllamapuppy @daisychains012 @y0ulooked @tinytacosuitcaseflap @supernatural-is-my-only-life @jula-pauline @melodykitty @just-that-bi-girl @crazybutconfidentaf @lowellshade @alphakees @bellero @weallneednamjesus @starryhanji @boiled-onionrings @husherstan @fockingwhore @melaningoddessthings @prettypastelpetals @haleypearce @godwhyamiawkward @y-napotat @daisychainyoonmin @little-miss-rebel3 @free-wheelin-bi-sexual @redmoon261 @darkacademic2 @wiseflamingoqueen @into-the-end @namikhai-i @nastiablr @thelittleplantlover @mirktuan @dont-hyuck @jjk-bunny @vintagegothlover @easygoingtheatre @itsrandombooklover @miiaivi @emmybaybee @befourgolden @jjk-is-my-shit @eternalteaaars @spacebadgerx @princesslunalight @acequinn14 @samm48 @misselsbells06 @simp-lykawa @fo-love @marishimomura-blog @therealglenncoco @cinnamonbun332 @killtherandomness @sanshinexxxsan @fee-btheweeb @press-lay @cathleenpotgieter16 @jazzydoesstuff @moonlxghtbay @forestrain2000 @hyunjinhugs @blood-of-fandoms @lovellylies @ukiyolixx @simpforhpcharacters @chrisdylan17 @parkerjisung @pedernille @theodonyous @wineandionysus @malfoystilinskii05 @morbid-x @coryisagee @jessewa26 @scoobydooluver97 @mindintheskies365 @raeanneinwonderland @indecisive-empanada @gluttonypalace @loriane2503 @btsiguess-kpop @khaoticbunny @lucidlycactus @smiithys @rottenroyalebooks @kpopgirlbtssvt @fangirl-tc27 @fr0z3n-1 @notmesimpingfortechno @shotarosleftpinky @kunoi-chan @idk-whats-wrong-with-me @yikeroonie @goldenstarofthunderclan @poetry-and-tea @ama-do-writing-stuff @wishbonewolf @emeraldxhope @t0xick1tty @kusuinko @speakyourselfloveyourself @sophia902103 @lo-manburg @classsykittykat @dmgama @depressedpuppythatneedscoffee @btsiguess-kpop @akaashi-baby @gun-jong-simp @geschichtenfee @yerapotato-wp @browneyedgirl365 @thysagclub @sparklycloudnight @helloatomicshadow @queentorresstuff @vtte @val-gal @lucy-bunny17 @aaliyahh0 @katluckybear @boyleanti @straybids @franchesca-791 @cosmicstorm19 @averyisbackinthetrashcan @aomi-nabi @xlanawriter @allensimpsforcorpse

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sweetkingdomstarlight-blog · 5 years ago

Text

they were roommates

Warnings - non consensual sex, anal sex, somnophilia, forced drug use

Pairings - Bucky Barnes x Reader

Words - over 2k

A/N - READ THE WARNINGS - I can’t stress this enough. Also if you are under 18 just shoo, bugger off. I wrote this from a prompt on @darkficsyouneveraskedfor stalker writing challenge, the prompt was your roommate isn’t who you thought they were. I’m still super new to writing and this is new territory for me, as always a huge massive thankyou to my beautiful wife @buckyownsmylife she helped me a lot and continues to hype me up.

It’s been six weeks since your friend got a new job upstate and moved out,. You’ve had an advert out for a new roommate but so far everyone who’s applied has either been rude or hasn’t shown up. You’re running low on your savings and would probably accept Satan himself if he could pay his fair share. That’s when your latest applicant knocked on your door.

James was polite and charming, he offered to pay a month up front to secure the room and could move in as soon as possible. You felt like a weight was lifted off your shoulders when he moved in later that week, it was a bit odd that he had no friends to help him but he didn’t seem to have a lot of stuff and had himself sorted while you worked in your home office.

The first night he offered to buy pizza and beers so you could get to know each other better, it turns out you two had a lot of things in common and he was easy to get along with. You must have had a few too many beers because your head felt fuzzy, deciding it was time to go to bed. You said goodnight to James and stood up but felt so dizzy you had to immediately sit back down. James was so sweet though, looking after you, he actually picked you up and put you to bed so you didn't have to walk the short distance to your room.

Waking up the next morning you realised you were wearing a t-shirt you didn’t recognise but you didn’t remember getting changed, your mouth felt strangely dry so you got up for a drink. That’s when the soreness hit you, in between your legs, rushing to the bathroom you were confused that you weren’t getting your period and nothing seemed to be different. You assumed you were getting sick and went for hot tea to soothe yourself.

Sitting at the kitchen counter drinking and nibbling on some dry toast, James walks in looking like he’s just been for a run. He grabs a bottle of water and walks over to you giggling “you can’t possibly be hungover you only had three drinks last night” you look up at him smirking and sarcastically respond, “yeah, well, maybe I’m just a lightweight”.

As you get up to clear away your mess he clears his throat making you turn. “Should we have a system for when we have people over in the future?” You look at him confused. “I’m sorry what do you mean? Do you want to bring someone over tonight?”

He chuckles at you, “Well no, not tonight but if you want your friend from last night to come back I can make sure you have some privacy,” he offers you, smirking at the confused look on your face.

“I’m sorry, I don't understand, I went to sleep last night. I didn’t have anyone over.” Taking a step closer, he leans on the counter separating you both. “Then who did I hear you with last night and who did I kick out this morning?” You stare at him open mouthed and scurry off to your room to check your phone for some clues, you feel your chest tighten when you see that you matched with someone last night and invited him over. How could you not remember? You were absolutely mortified, what is James going to think of you now?

Sitting in your home office talking to idiot customers on the phone all day, you try to take your mind off what happened last night. How can you have invited someone over, had sex and apparently stolen his t-shirt without even knowing? You vow there and then you aren’t drinking ever again. However, the end of the week rolls by and it's been the absolute worst, your boss is a dick, your customers are all idiots and to top it off your best friend hasn’t responded to your calls all week and you don’t know why.

You have a quick shower and decide to spend the night binge watching whatever you can find on Netflix when James sits next to you handing you a gin and tonic. “Thanks but I’m not drinking for a little while.” You go to put the drink down but he pushes it up to your mouth

“Don’t be silly, you’ve had a hard week. One drink won’t hurt” smiling at him you take a sip and he’s right, you instantly relax and get cosy on the sofa, ordering chinese and laughing at the show you both decide on. Waking up in the middle of the night with a dry mouth again, you find yourself laying on your bed but this time you have your own clothes on which is a relief. Standing up, you feel a bit weird round the back like you’ve been stretched out with one of your plugs but that’s not possible, they’re hidden in your box under the bed.

You drink a big glass of water and sit on the kitchen counter, a little uncomfortably, but quietly and relax. Something has been off the last week and you can’t put your finger on it, it's always weird when you get a new roommate and you’ve put it down to that but you just sense something isn’t quite right. You lean your head back on the wall behind you and get a surprise when James walks round the corner. “Hey doll, you feeling ok? You looked a bit sickly earlier and went to bed. I didn’t want to wake you up.”

You nod at how sweet he was and drink some more water before hopping down. “I’m fine just going to sleep it off.” He takes your glass for you, offering to wash it and says goodnight, watching you walk away very closely and licking his lips as his eyes roam over your body.

It’s been a few weeks now since James moved in, he’s got to be the best roommate you’ve ever had. He pays his bills on time, keeps the place spotless and he’s such a good cook, always making food and drinks for you. It's lucky that he’s so kind because none of your friends seem to be in touch anymore, you message them and even try calling them but no one ever replies.

You sit watching your usual Friday night film with drinks and Chinese takeout, talking to James about both your weeks, tonight though he sits closer than usual and his face seems to light up when you talk to him. He’s possibly the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen in real life, you’ve never looked at him that way before because not only is he your roommate but he’s so far out of your league it's laughable. You tell one of your stupid jokes and he laughs with his whole body, his arm goes around the back of the sofa and he pulls you in close, hugging into him, you relax biting your lip when he kisses the top of your head.

That was the beginning of it for you both. You had daily movie nights, he cooked for you every day, listened when you got upset that your friends seemed to have dropped you and even encouraged you to start running with him. Everything felt perfect, you still occasionally woke up sore with a dry mouth but James told you it was just your body getting used to all the exercise you were now doing. Both of you had really found each other, loners who just needed someone to listen.

You went down to collect your mail one day and stood talking to your elderly neighbour when she told you how familiar James looked, she couldn’t work out where she knew him from but she praised you on finding such a nice young man who apparently had carried her groceries up the stairs for her when the elevator was broken. Smiling at her you told her to have a good morning and went back to your apartment looking at the thick brown envelope addressed to you, you never really got anything in the post except the occasional leaflet. James had made you a coffee and you smiled at him taking the package in your room to open while you got ready to have a shower.

In the shower you decided tonight would be the night with James, you shaved yourself from head to toe and used your best lotions. Winking at him as you walked to your room, he had a weird look on his face and couldn’t seem to look at you. In your room the envelope had been moved, it looked like it was open too. Bending down to pick it up you hear James behind you but before you can turn around you feel a pain in your neck and everything goes dark.

You wake up with a blinding headache and go to move but your body feels too heavy. “Ssshh sweetheart, don’t move, I had to tie you up for your own safety.” You look at him confused, trying to pull on your wrists but you can’t move.

“James, what’s happening?” Sitting next to you he slips some ice chips in your mouth to ease your dry throat and takes a deep breath.

“You can blame your friend, we were so happy and she had to try and take you away from me.” A tear runs down your cheek, you’ve never heard him talk like this and it’s terrifying. “I told your little friends to leave you alone or I’d take care of them all but they just didn’t listen.” He throws the envelope down and slowly shows you the newspaper clippings and articles they had sent you, apparently he was on the run and considered dangerous, something to do with what happened with the helicarriers that crashed a few months ago.

“I’m not the Winter Soldier anymore,” he says with a smirk, wiping your tears away and tutting. “Don’t be scared of me, I’m doing this for you, for us!” Pulling on the restraints on your feet and arms again he shouts, “Enough!” You stop immediately, scared of what he‘ll do if you don’t. “You were so nice to me on the phone when I first got free, you helped me hire that car that brought me to New York. I hacked into your company's database and found you. Your roommate was easy to convince with a little bit of money and I hired all those people to come and see you so when I finally got my chance you’d want me as much as I’ve wanted you”

“Why didn’t you just ask me out like a normal person?” You managed to stutter out, trying not to sound too pathetic.

“You never leave the house, you stay home all day working then sit watching TV all night, I saw you through the webcam. You really should be more careful.” He smirks before running his fingers over your naked body. Feeling how smooth and soft your skin is he smiles. “Did you do all this for me? Sweetheart, I’ve already had all of you, you don’t have to do anything special for me. I love you just the way you are”.

The realisation hits you and you sob loudly. “Have you been touching me while I sleep?” He tilts his head to the side and looks at you with so much admiration.

“You’re so smart, I’ve been preparing you to be mine. I didn’t know how long it's been since you’ve been with a real man, not those silly little toys under your bed and I wanted our first time to be special. I even set up that fake dating account so you would think you had a guy over on that first night.” He strokes your cheek and you have to bite your tongue to stop yourself from crying.

“James I’m cold, can you untie me and we can talk properly, please.” He studies your face for a brief moment before leaning forward and chuckling in your ear.

“You can’t think I’m that stupid baby, oh and you can call me Bucky now. If you’re going to be mine forever we need to get better acquainted.” He drops his sweatpants and straddles your hips. “We’re going to have so much fun”.

#bucky barnes x you #bucky x reader #bucky #bucky barns fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #Winter Soldier

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thiswaycomessomethingwicked · 3 years ago

Note

So I know you've mentioned Grima's brothers in your works, but what do you overall see his family/childhood looking like? The way I headcanon it, his birth mother was Rohirrim and his father Dunlending, they had a fling, she dropped him off and was never heard from again, and he had to deal with a cold stepmother and bullying half-siblings, so with that headcanon in mind, I'm really interested in knowing what you feel his upbringing/family/siblings are like!

And sister! We can't forge Brynja!

I got into this a little bit in the Swimming Through Fire series, mostly it comes up in Cycles of Song where we meet the brothers (I tried hard to get Brynja to show up, but she didn't want to appear on the page in present-tense just yet).

Essentially, I have it that Grima's mother is not Rohirrim. I made up a group of people, the Skoltse, who are out from near the Sea of Rhun. Mostly because all we get for people from anywhere east is that they are "easterlings" but like hell would a) they be calling themselves that, and b) are they a monolith. So I came up with at least one of the nations/ethnic groups from out that way.

His mother was fleeing the encroachment of Sauron and his forces into the east and ended up in Rohan where she met Grima's father and they shacked up.

I have it that Galmod breeds and trains horses and also has land/does some farming. Owensel, as the eldest son, inherited everything.

From Grima's account to Legolas:

Gríma shrugs. ‘My mother isn’t from Éomarc. So far as I understand it, my mother saw my father at some faire or other, walked up to him and said: you and he said: me? and she said: that’s what I said. It went from there.’

Grima and his sister, they're twins, are the youngest in the family and were what one could call "happy accidents". They were born when their mother was nearing forty and it had been super unexpected. Galmod never knew what to do with Grima when he was a boy, because he was a bit of an odd ball - one of those quiet kids who stares a lot and never blinks. When he did talk it was to ask incessant questions. Lots of "but why?'

Grima never took to the more traditional pursuits of Rohirrim boys, aside from hunting and stalking which he liked (likes still, as an adult). Which made socialization difficult. He spent a lot of time hanging out in the weaving room with his mother and sister and that was absolutely Not the done thing for boys (and men) (loosely based on the early medieval Scandinavian general taboo of men entering weaving rooms as it could make you effeminate~~~).

Galmod, as he didn't know what to do with Grima, left Grima to be essentially raised by his older brothers Owensel and Baldir. Leaving siblings to raise each other is never a great time for anyone involved. Owensel very much believed in "toughening" Grima up and trying to make sure he was "ready for the world" which involved a lot of beating him up and chucking him into the Limlight river and other such, uh, "games".

From Cycles:

Gríma is always somewhat missing Brynja when she is away, but doubly so when other members of the family are around. Who will blunt the blow of Owensel’s presence if not Brynja? To her, he is a good older brother. To Gríma, not so much. Which Gríma knows to be mostly due to his own acerbic temperament coupled with his unfortunate composition and disinclination to partake of anything remotely aligned with what is expected of a good Éothéod man.

Or, as Brynja always says, You are water and he is oil and that is the fault of no one in particular.

But Brynja is kind, like that. With her additions of: I know it’s complicated. And, It’s neither one of you directly to blame for the disagreements and general ill feelings. And, Alstadt is a difficult place for everyone.

Gríma, of course, believes the bad blood to be entirely Owensel’s fault. Owensel, naturally, blames Gríma. What started it all? He can’t remember. Something and nothing, most likely. How most of these things go.

He was always a surly, queer, smart-mouthed child who Gálmód never knew what to do with him so left him to be raised by his older brothers who also didn’t know what to do with him. Owensel probably found all of this to be a burden in his continued quest to be accepted by the other boys in the village. Hard enough when your mother is not from the area, worse still if your younger brother is the way he is. Siblings tend to be marked with the same brush, regardless of the accuracy of such markings.

The bullying Grima dealt with from other village kids was also focused more on his behaviour than anything else - so basically they all decided he was the Middle Earth equivalent of a "dirty queer" and insulted him accordingly. The Third Age version of "you're so gay" commenced. Which, as Grima noted, is something that also impacted his brothers, because kids are nasty like that. Owensel was less than pleased about this.

There was also definitely some bullying for all the siblings because their mother was not Rohirrim, but that was more a product of Rohan's general xenophobia and racism issues than anything in particular. I.e., it's not like Rohirrim hate Skoltse people in particular (they're not Dunlanders), they just don't trust any "outsiders". Which is a bit rich, considering the history of Rohan and how they got their land.

When he was seventeen, Grima and his sister took off from home and travelled throughout Gondor before eventually returning to Rohan by their early to mid twenties. Brynja married around that time and Grima went to Edoras and fell into the employ of the king's household.

Of his family, Grima is closest to his sister. He actually likes Brynja, she's on the list of six (6) people Grima genuinely likes. It's a limited list and he's steadily trying to whittle it down because liking people is a hassle and, in his view, doesn't end well.

He has a complex relationship with his mother, I don't think either likes each other but they also don't dislike one another. Grima is the most like his mother, out of the siblings, and I think Cerridwen has some weird feelings about her tiny goth child who reminds her of herself and not in good ways. Grima doesn't ever really think about his father, hates Owensel, and is like like "whatever" about Baldir because Baldir died when Grima was ten.

So that's my short run of his childhood and family. He was definitely isolated and bullied - which became a bit of a self-defeating circle of like "the face you give the world tells the world how to treat you / the world treats you in a way that tells you what sort of face to give it."

He also never learned how to form relationships in a healthy, normal way which leads to him trampling over and ignoring boundaries and people saying 'fuck off' in a variety of ways. Like he knows they're saying that, he's just ignoring it.

A lot of this also made him very "if you're going to call me a snake, then I'm going to be the snakiest snake who ever fucking snaked. Just watch me."

He is, essentially, a Gillian Flynn novel in human skin. All that meanness and darkness and fucked-upness of her characters wrapped up in one.

Gillian Flynn quotes that are relevant to Grima:

"There's something disturbing about recalling a warm memory and feeling utterly cold"

"I was not a loveable child, and I'd grown into a deeply unlovable adult. Draw a picture of my soul and it'd be a scribble with fangs."

"I have a meanness inside me, real as any organ. Slit me at my belly and it might slide out, meaty and dark, drop it on the floor so you could stomp on it."

"I just think some women aren't made to be mothers. And some women aren't made to be daughters."

"I felt a quiet mixture of relief and horror: when you finally stop an itch and realize it's because you've ripped a hole in your skin."

"A child weaned on poison considers harm a comfort."

In terms of the books we obviously don't know anything about Grima's family other than his father's name and that he is, presumably, a man of Rohan. If he was anything else, it would have been noted. Absolutely. Especially if he were of some Dunlander extraction, or had a parent from out east, or anything like that, we would for sure know. Tolkien would have mentioned it.

For the movies, I've mentioned in various and sundry asks before: Grima's appearance is because film is a visual medium and therefore we have him with black hair and everyone else blond(e). When, in fact, that doesn't make sense and there would be a wide variety of appearance in Rohan, including hair colour. Darker hair might be more rare, but it wouldn't be unheard of or anything.

However, it does give us something to play with and I know those of us, myself included, who have him having non-Rohirrim parentage of at least one parent, lean on the visuals of the movie.

(Book is way more vague and just says he is "a wizened figure of a man, with a pale wise face, and heavy lidded eyes." I believe they're also described as "dark eyes" at one point. He also is described as having a long, pale tongue. So who knows what else was going on.)

Now! All this said, here's my one call-out to canon where it could be interpreted as a hint of Grima having at least some family who isn't from Rohan.

Grima is one of the only characters from Rohan with a non-Anglo-Saxon name. Grima’s name is from old Icelandic Grimr, which is a name Odinn takes during the Grimnismal saga. (He is also given the feminine version of Grimr - as I've said before in other asks, it's like calling a male character Henrietta instead of Henry. Make of that what you will.)

Eomer, Theoden, Eowyn, Theodred, Eomund, Hama, Eothain, Erkenbrand, Elhelm, Elfwyn etc. are all, for the most part, anglo-saxon/Old English names. Grima's is from a different region entirely.

Thank you for the ask! :D :D I do enjoy nattering on about him! ❤️ ❤️

#grima thoughts #grima wormtongue #ask #reply #anon #fanfic #writing #cycles of song

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cat-induced-fever-dream · 4 years ago

Text

I was in the middle before I knew that I had begun.

Pairing: Wanda x Reader

Genre: Angst if you squint really hard. Fluff to make up for Marvel reminding me that Nat is dead.

Description: The falling in love of Wanda Maximoff and you. (If anyone has a better description please hit me up.)

Notes: Was going to be a one-shot and then it didn’t happen so there’s going to be a second part. It’ll probably happen in like a month though since I have a trip. Comments always appreciated. :)

- - -

You’re not sure when it happened. To be fair, neither is Wanda.

You had just started with SHIELD, and were there for the battle with Ultron, and then when Wanda became an Avenger. You remember the admiration you held for her, for her powers, for her determination to do what was right, her grit. Now, it was more of a well-deserved respect. Her strength when everything else in her life seemed to be gone, her brutal honesty regarding matters important to her, and her loyalty to those she cared about.

Maybe that’s when it started. As an exemplary agent, you could handle most things Fury assigned you, but being an Avenger? That was a whole new battleground. One that Wanda had your six on. From simple things, like showing you around the compound, and looking for you when you inevitably got lost (again). Wanda with her no frills attitude and sharp tongue, lashing out at Fury himself when he assigned you your 6th mission in 4 days. Wanda with her soft smiles that made your stomach flip and whispered jokes when she noticed your anxiousness on a mission. It wasn’t easy, keeping up with super soldiers, spies with years of experience on you, actual gods, but Wanda made it simple.

- - -

Wanda sometimes wondered if she could really be a hero. She wasn’t a good person. She had done terrible things. Then you stumbled in, a fresh agent and an even fresher Avenger, but you looked at her with no distrust. A little lost perhaps, but no malice. That confused SHIELD agent? It reminded her of, well, her. It may have been under different circumstances, but in essence, they were the same. Thrust into a world of avenging, knowing no one, knowing nothing. So she threw you a line, offered her support when you looked like you needed it. Wanda expected a bite, but she didn’t expect a tug back. The way you offered to help her practice her powers (a little naively), and then when you realised your mistake, your offer to teach her the hand to hand combat you had learned from SHIELD. The way you always looked back for her on a mission, even when you knew she could protect herself with said powers. You were on her team, a comfort she didn’t have since Pietro died. Okay well the Avengers were also her team, but you were her person, always in her corner.

- - -

It shouldn’t be this easy. Sometimes it felt like you could read each other’s minds. To be fair, Wanda could read your mind, but you knew she wouldn’t do it without your permission. Still, there was something about your unspoken agreements that came so naturally. Where everyone else was on comms, it was like the pair of you were tuned to the same wavelength, communicating in a code not even Natasha could decrypt.

“You just get me, you know?” Wanda says, as the two of you are sprawled on her bed after a mission. “It’s like our brains are, I dunno, smooshed together or something. Not even Vision feels like this, and we’re literally connected by an Infinity Stone in his head.”

“Smooshed together?” you laugh. “What an insightful description. And I can’t believe you just compared me to that toaster. I’m obviously way better than him.”

“You realise he can shoot lasers right?”

“And I can turn on a laser on the sights of my guns. Sit down, you’re not special.”

This earns you a giggle. “But it’s like you’re in my brain.”

“Oh so I’m always on your mind?”

“Shut up Y/N/N.”

“Maybe your powers are rubbing off on me,” you joke, wiggling your fingers in her face.

“I do not look like that,” cries Wanda indignantly. “And if you have my powers, what am I thinking about right now?”

“Stealing Sam’s cupcakes,” you reply with no hesitation.

“I was actually thinking about how I hope Steve never reassigns mission partners,” she says pointedly. “But now that you mention it, I could really do with a cupcake.”

“I was right then?” you tease, tugging her towards the kitchen with a cheeky grin.

Wanda rolls her eyes at you, but she mirrors your grin and your stomach is swooping again.

“For the record, you’re my favourite mission partner too.”

- - -

Wanda didn’t expect to call the compound home. She stayed because she had nowhere else to go. And with her differences with Stark and the friendly but still guarded manner of the other Avengers initially (though she didn’t blame them), she kept to herself. But you were different. She noticed the way you prioritised her, looked out for her, to the best of your ability.

She’s shaken from nightmare and automatically, her feet lead her towards you. It’s late, she knows, but when she knocks on your door, you open with an easy smile and open arms that envelop her gently. When her sobbing subsides, you break away, wiping the tear tracks with your thumb.

“Dick van Dyke?” you ask.

Nodding wordlessly, Wanda lets you lead her your bed and settles in beside you.

That’s when she notices the stacks of files illuminated by your desk light.

“Sorry,” she sniffles, throat raw from crying, “did I interrupt you?”

“Oh those?” you say, waving dismissively at your desk. “Maria’s just been on my back lately to get those done, but it’ll be fine.”

With a stab of guilt, she makes to move of the bed, but you grab her wrist before she can. “Don’t worry about it, those can wait.”

As the TV murmurs softly in the background, you wrap a comforting hand around her, and she begins to drift off, nightmares warded away by your presence.

And she wakes up the next morning with the duvet pulled over her, and you slumped at your desk.

- - -

It was an easy mission. Most missions are when you and Wanda are paired together. Get in, get the data, get out. But then HYDRA agents were swarming the building, and intel definitely didn’t mention this level of security, and the exits were blocked off.

“I’m definitely gonna punch Tony later for this,” you groan, and Wanda shoots you a smile before returning to the approaching soldiers. Silently you whip around, firing rounds at the agents on the other end of the corridor. This was one of the many “plans” you had with Wanda, the endless missions allowing you to familiarise yourself with how your two fighting styles complimented each other. Being the enhanced out of you two, Wanda would push forward, handling the bulk of attacks with a flick of her wrist. You had her back, shooting at the stragglers who came from behind. Spotting something that resembled a server room, you gave a tug on her sleeve and she nodded, reassuring you that she had it handled.

Not wanting to leave Wanda for longer than necessary, you plug in the drive to do its Stark-tech thing and bolted back outside. To find the bodies slumped en masse on both end of the hallway.

“Guess you did have it handled,” you say, waving at the uniformed soldiers.

“Oh my god that isn’t even a good pun,” the witch replies, before continuing with a smirk. “But yes, I am way more powerful than you.”

“Don’t think that was ever in question,” you say, but then alarms were blaring, and the building plunges into a red glow and then oh my god there’s a gun behind Wanda and before you knew what was happening, a shot had fired from your gun and there was a burning pain in your shoulder.

The brunette whirls around just as you collapse into the wall. “Guess you’re not as an amazing shot as I am though,” you mutter, before blacking out.

- - -

To say Wanda was in a state of panic was an understatement. It was more like a whole damn continent. As much as she reassured you before missions, your easygoing, playful attitude was her anchor in these intense situations. Everywhere felt like home, like you two bickering on the couches. Your constant presence was like bringing a piece of the compound with her. And regardless of her experience as an Avenger, as an ex-agent, you were undoubtedly better with running missions. Not everything was a save the world type threat after all.

Eyes darting around, Wanda noted that you had indeed shot the last agent, before skimming across your bleeding out form.

The training doors opened with a bang and Wanda turned to the noise. Then she found herself pinned to the floor.

“Stay focused on the mission,” you scolded, before helping her back up.

The drive. You’d be pissed if she didn’t get it. Sprinting into the server room, she rips it from the port.

“Okay don’t laugh at me, but this is my hierarchy of the 3 Is.”

“Eyes?” Wanda asks.

“No, like the letter I. At the top is innocents, and they’re my priority. Steve says you can’t save everyone, but I can damn sure try. Next is the idiots. That’s the mission. ‘Cause I’d say you’re pretty damn stupid to go up against the Avengers. And finally we have Iron Man, or the heroes. As much as it’s going to hurt, we can’t let the sentiment get in the way. We all knew what we were signing up for, and I’m pretty sure all of us would rather it be us than someone else.”

“Thank you o wise one,” she mocks.

Wanda smiles a little at the memory, but tears pool at her eyes. Then she hears it, the faint footsteps pulling her back from her daze.

“Damn you and your stupid heart of gold,” she whispers, before flying the two of you back to the ship.

- - -

The steady beeping tugs you from slumber.

“Oh you’re up.”

You strain your neck to see Tony walking up with a bowl in his hands.

“You don’t sound very excited to see me Stark.”

“Not when I have to bring meals up here every day for Maximoff,” he says, pointing at the sleeping girl on the chair. “Hasn’t moved for days. Figured I’d hand deliver as an apology.”

“Aw did she punch you for me?”

“Worse,” he chuckled. “Gave me an earful.”

“I’d say you deserve it after that.”

He rubs his neck sheepishly. “Really, I’m sorry though. That was on me.”

“Don’t worry about it,” you smile. “I’ll be fine. And thanks for looking after her.”

Tony nods politely before leaving the meal and you two alone.

“It’s good to have you back kiddo,” he calls, before shutting the door.

Reaching an arm through the railing, you poke Wanda’s elbow.

“Meal delivery for Miss Maximoff?”

The curled up form stirs a little, rubbing her eyes, before freezing in shock.

“You’re back!”

“Apparently so,” you reply with a wry grin.

Wanda leans over the hospital bed, green eyes searching for any injuries.

“I missed you,” she murmurs.

“And you missed one-“

A slap hits you on your injured arm, and you hiss in pain.

“I’m not apologising for that one,” she glares.

Raising your good arm up in surrender, you pout. “Don’t I get a pity pass?”

“Not for worrying me like that.”

“But it wasn’t even my fault!”

She rolls her eyes (she seems to do that a lot at you some reason).

“Wait,” you frown, “we broke our perfect mission streak.”

“Are you kidding me right now?”

Then she’s hugging you, her nose pressed into your neck. Her soft brown hair cascades over your face like a waterfall, tickling your chin. Through your gown, you’re hyper-aware of the cool metal of the rings which adorn her fingers, how nice she smells, how right it feels to be held by her.

“I’m glad you’re okay,” she mumbles, her breath warming your neck, and your stomach is doing acrobatics. Even with the meds, you’re aware that this feels familiar, like something.

Pulling away, she studies your face. “Never. Do. That. Again.”

You laugh. “Glad we’re in agreement.”

It must be the meds, it must be.

#wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda marvel #wanda x reader #wanda maximoff x you #scarlet witch #marvel #mcu

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bubblegumbeech · 4 years ago

Text

Haunted Towers and Hidden Truths

Phic Phight prompt by @lexiepiper

Write a more traditional ghost story. How would things change if ghost powers weren’t super powers, but closer to old horror movie tropes?

“We shouldn’t do this Danny,” Sam said, ever the voice of reason. “This place isn’t like our usual haunts.“

But Danny shook his head, “No Sam, I have to do this. I have to know what that dream meant, if it was really a dream or something else.”

He moved to take a step forward when his other friend, Tucker, grabbed his arm, “I don’t know man, I think she’s right. There isn’t a possessed item to destroy, or an overactive ghost to try and calm down, heck even Vlad has a weakness we can exploit, we don’t know anything about this place. What if we don’t make it out of this one?”

“Come on Tucker,” Danny argued, his own confidence nothing but a mask, “It can’t be as bad as the haunted video game right? You die in the game you die in real life!”

Tucker didn’t laugh, “this is serious Danny, I know that dream had you messed up, but what if it was just that? A dream?”

“Or,” Sam cut in, “What if it’s a trap? Remember how Desiree tried to get us with that monkey’s paw when she realized we were getting involved with every scary story and urban legend in town and she didn’t want us to find out about her?”

There was also the time a ghost discovered Danny’s secret and decided to haunt him personally and make his life a living hell until he and Tucker were able to exorcise it. It had involved a gorilla, a lot of research into dead safari hunters, and one of his parent’s inventions that they rigged to do what they needed before destroying it so it couldn’t be used against Danny himself.

“We made it through all of those things together, remember when we first saw Cujo? And we thought he was to blame for Valerie’s mother?” Danny said.

Sam deflated, “and then we did research and discovered that Cu Sith only foretell death, not cause it… But Danny, we tried to research this place, remember? We found nothing. It’s like it doesn’t exist.”

“Yeah man,” Tucker scratched the back of his neck uncertain, “I couldn’t find so much as a blueprint. No building plans, nothing. The only thing we have to go on are stories from reckless kids trying and failing to spend the night.”

“You don’t have to follow me, the last thing I want is to put you both at risk. Especially after last time.”

Tucker groaned, “Danny you know we aren’t going to let you do this alone right? Especially not after Walker’s prison. Who knows what would have happened if we didn’t come in and save you?”

Danny smiled, “I probably would have starved to death to be fair, but yeah, I’ll try to avoid getting locked in any metal cages, deal?”

“To be fair,” Sam said, returning his smile with one of her own, strained though it was, “you probably would have died of thirst first.”

Chuckling at his friends' attempts to lighten the mood once they realized his mind wouldn’t be changed, Danny finally let himself look up at the place in question. It was a tall, crooked looking clocktower with old, brittle wood and peeling paint. In the low light of the evening it looked almost purple and with the dust and cobwebs covering it, it was clear no one had been inside for quite some time.

The Clocktower was a recurrent presence in his dreams, the ones he’d started having since the accident that made him the way he was: different from any person, but not quite anything else. It was always there in the background, but he’d never gone inside.

Once, during a particularly dull recurring dream where he relived the life and consequent death of a warehouse worker, he’d walked away from the endless piles of boxes and tried to go inside the clocktower instead. But no matter how far he traveled, it was always the same distance away. He just couldn’t get to it.

Danny couldn’t shake the feeling though, that something inside might have the answers he’s been searching for. So he stepped forward, and knocked on the door.

There was no answer, of course, and Danny almost felt foolish doing it, but also, ghosts and spiritual beings all had their own rules and perceptions of what is or isn’t polite, most of which Danny had stumbled into learning the hard way, and it really didn’t hurt to check.

“No answer,” Sam said and Danny nodded, turning the handle. It was old and brass and when it turned it made a loud grinding noise that vibrated along his arm. But it did open, and without Danny needing to persuade it, so that had to be a good sign right?

Unless it really was a trap.

“Maybe we should leave someone outside, in case it really is like Walker’s prison.” He offered, but both of his friends shook their heads and stepped past him. It was dark, musty and smelled in a weird way, like a library. If a library had locked its doors and not let anyone enter for a good century or so.

Sam took the lead, her flashlight catching on unfamiliar shapes and shadows. “Do you know what we’re looking for?” she asked, her voice uncertain.

Danny shook his head, “Not really, just… answers.”

They looked around the ground floor at first, but if it held anything particularly supernatural or important, it wasn’t going to be found. “This just looks like my grandma's living room.” Tucker complained, taking the sheet off of one of the couches, “we need to go further in if we want to actually find something.”

He wasn’t wrong, Danny looked over to the spiralling staircase in the back of the room, and then to the other doors that surrounded it on the first floor. “It’s probably better to do this systemically right? Go through every room on each floor and move our way up?”

“You mean like in a video game?” Sam asked, “sure, we can do that.”

They started on the left, but that room wasn’t much better when it came to finding any kind of clues. It held a kitchen, a very old kitchen, with a stove and oven that Danny had only ever seen in period movies. But…

“Why does it smell like cookies?” Danny asked, turning to his friends who both looked at him like he was crazy.

“Cookies? Yo, Danny this place smells like straight up death. Not cookies.” Tucker said, backing away from the oven and starting to open up cabinets.

Sam rolled her eyes and did the same on the other side of the kitchen, “it doesn’t smell like death you dolt, it smells… like a graveyard.”

Danny walked to the middle of the room, towards the oven- he always made sure to be the one seeking out the more dangerous or suspicious things in the haunts they went to- while the two of them bickered. They tended to start these smaller, petty arguments when they were scared, it took the edge off.

“Duh?” Tucker said, and Danny heard him slam one of the cabinets shut, “graveyards are death? What does it smell like to you? Your Mom’s perfume?”

“No, it smells like someone dying, you know all hospital chemicals and gross stuff.”

There wasn’t anything in the oven, but oddly, Danny had felt a wave of warmth when he opened it. Almost like it had just been used. But, ghosts didn’t need to eat, right? And there couldn’t have been a person living here, they’d notice that. At least, Danny hopes they would notice that. After being in dozens of life or death scenarios hinging on whether they noticed important but minute details, they’d become pretty good at that kind of thing.

“Ugh! Don’t talk about hospitals, I’m still not over North Mercy, that was horrible,” Tucker turned to Danny, leaning on one of the counters and ignoring the cabinet he opened right behind his head. “What do you think death smells like Danny?”

Danny walked over and closed the cabinet, he didn’t want something to suddenly appear inside of it all twisted limbs and empty eyes or for something to crawl out and scare them, or even have it slam shut on Tuckers head, like some ghosts were known to do. He didn’t have to put much thought into his answer, “It smells like burnt flesh, electricity, and polished wood.”

Tucker paled, “oh… right. Sorry.”

He shrugged, “anything yet?”

“Not unless you count cobwebs, dust, and deteriorating cooking books,” Sam answered, walking over to both him and Tucker.

Danny looked around at the kitchen, it looked normal, even some dying light shone in from the one window along the outer wall. The only thing weird was the shape and that was because it was at the bottom of a spiralling clocktower. There was nothing particularly scary about the place, and frankly Danny didn’t know what to do with that.

“Let’s move on, this place is giving me the creeps,” Sam said, crossing the room and going to the next door.

Danny and Tucker followed, unwilling to be left behind, or to let her go on her own. The next room was the same size as the other two, but it had an extra window and was crammed absolutely full of books. Just books. Stacks and stacks of them where they didn’t fit on the shelves, which were completely packed themselves, and Danny had the thought that this was probably what he was smelling when they first walked in.

It was a library. A personal one, but without any room to sit or anything to sit on despite the genuinely impressive display of books and Danny found himself gently stroking his hand against the cover of a book on the top of the nearest stack, When Ghosts Speak: Understanding Earthbound Spirits.

“Please tell me we aren’t reading all of this,” Tucker whined. Danny frowned, why wouldn’t he want to read these? It was a treasure trove of information, these books could have countless, researched, answers to questions they’ve been asking since the start of everything!

What if one of these books could tell them why Amity Park seemed to attract the supernatural, why they seemed to gain power within the city’s boundaries, why Danny wasn’t dead. He wanted nothing more than to grab any one of these books, walk into the next room, with the couches and comfortable chairs, sit down and read and read until he found something, anything he could use.

These books might even be able to help him deal with the supernatural threats that plagued their town. Mostly they’ve been surviving through luck and half baked internet searches with the occasional trip to the town library. And while it had been enough so far, Danny was practically salivating at the thought of being properly, genuinely prepared for something for once.

“Of course we aren’t,” Sam said, dragging Danny out of his fantasies of maybe knowing what he was doing, “they’re completely deteriorated. If we even tried to open one it would probably fall apart.”

Danny frowned, and then looked down at the book he’d subconsciously grabbed. It didn’t seem as bad as Sam was describing, but he also didn’t want to risk it either. He’d realized early on there was a difference between what he was seeing and what was actually real. He set it down gently and looked around the rest of the room with his friends.

“Are we so sure this place is haunted?” Danny asked. By then, the sun had set entirely and the only light left was their flashlights. High powered and with fresh batteries they were still little use against the encroaching dark and Danny wanted to move on to the next floor already if he wasn’t going to be able to open a book.

Tucker stood up from behind a precariously leaning shelf and dusted himself off, “Dude you’re the one that said there was something here and we needed to investigate. Remember, like an hour ago when the two of us were trying to stop you from going inside?”

Danny scoffed, “that’s not what I mean.”

“What do you mean then?” Sam asked, stepping closer so she could meet his eyes. There was something in her expression, curiosity or suspicion, Danny couldn’t quite parse.

“I…” Danny stopped to think, what did he mean? Was it just that the place didn’t feel haunted? There wasn’t anything here trying to scare him away, no ominous winds or loud knocking, but they’ve gone into haunts before that took a long time to start actually reacting to them. “There’s no, I don’t know how to explain it. Usually when we go somewhere haunted, that a ghost has a claim to or whatever… there’s this feeling that I’m trespassing? I don’t feel like I’m trespassing here.”

That probably didn’t make any sense, and despite everything they didn’t usually act on Danny’s gut instincts as a group without evidence. The issue with the circus and it’s terrifying owner was a lesson too well learned after all.

True to expectations neither Sam nor Tucker looked convinced. They shared a quick ‘what now’ look between each other and Danny resisted taking a step back and sinking into the wall. Not that he could do that, as far as he knew he couldn’t do that. Only actual ghosts could do something like that and despite everything Danny was still human- well, still had a physical form.

Permanently.

“Let’s move on upstairs,” Sam reasoned, “if Danny’s right there won’t be any harm in it, and if he’s not we’ll find out once whatever’s here starts actually reacting to us, right?”

Perfectly reasonable and logicked as always. Danny nodded and walked to the next door, if he was right it would lead into the room they had first entered with the staircase that twisted and climbed higher and higher into the heart of the tower. That was the next place to go. He knew that.

Tucker gently patted his shoulder as they walked towards the base of the stairs, “yeah, maybe the ghost doesn’t consider this bottom part his haunt? Maybe he just likes the clock on top?”

Danny smiled, “like the hunchback of Notre Dame?”

Smiling back, Tucker nodded, “exactly! Oh man, we gotta find out if that guy is real one of these days.”

“We have our hands a bit tied with Amity Park without going after disney characters,” Sam said, pushing the two of them from behind so they’d actually go up the stairs. “Now let's get a move on, I want to be back home before breakfast so my parents don’t realize I snuck out again.”

There was something Danny could say but he bit back the comment about how at least her parents would notice and quickly walked up the stairs instead. As soon as his feet touched the first step a bubbly feeling lifted in his chest, and it made him want to go higher as fast as he could there was someone up there waiting for him-

“Danny!” Sam called out, grabbing him by the arm, “calm down!”

Her grip on his arm was tight and Danny looked down to see what had her panicked only to find his feet had left the stairs entirely and he’d started floating upwards instead of walking. Like a human. Like his friends. Like what he was supposed to be.

He swallowed and let himself sink back down, forcing the feeling in his chest back as much as he could. It was like trying to kill the fizz in a shaken soda by screwing a cap back on it and he struggled with it for a moment. He’d never felt like this before- sure, most ghosts and other supernatural entities tended to broadcast emotions to a higher degree than humans, and with them also being natural empaths and Danny’s unfortunate situation it often led to him being overtaken by emotions that weren’t necessarily his own.

It’s just, they’ve never been this overwhelmingly positive before.

Even with Vlad, as human as he was, his emotions were always tinted with obsession and desperation. His need to have Danny and his mother for his own colored every interaction he’d had with the man and it often left a bitter, strained feeling in his chest. Right now, Danny felt almost giddy. And he wasn’t even sure it wasn’t just his own emotions, reacting to the environment around him. It was a nice environment after all.

But Danny was good at ignoring things like that.

“My bad. I’ll try and keep my feet on the ground from now on.”

Sam looked conflicted, “Danny you know we don’t mind you using your powers,” Danny nodded, they’d told him so many times over and over again, “But we don’t want to lose you to them. You promised to stay with us, remember?”

Danny smiled, “I remember. I won’t end up like that, I promised. That’s why we’re here right? To stop it?”

Sam nodded and let him go.

The second floor was similar to the first, in that it had three rooms leading into each other with the spiral staircase in the center. Danny started with the door on the right. It was a study. There was a desk, paperwork, and a bottle of ink with a quill and Danny found himself wondering just how old this clocktower really was. And how long it had been since its occupant was truly here, alive, if ever.

They split up and started looking around, eagerness exposed in their movements. This was the most likely place to have something useful, especially if whoever spent their time here was as studious as the lower floor suggested. Danny went for the desk.

There was a note on it, in perfect, looped handwriting and the ink was still glistening, fresh from the bottle if the smell had anything to say about it. Danny ran his hand across the words hoping to smudge it, but it had dried already, if barely.

It’s nice to meet you, little anomaly.

Danny grit his teeth.

“Guys,” he called out, holding the paper, “It knows we’re here.”

Sam and Tucker rushed over, and Sam grabbed the paper from his hand to read for herself. “Little anomaly? Isn't that kind of insensitive?”

“Yeah,” Tucker agreed, “you just have weird ghost powers right? Vlad’s the same way it’s not like you’re the only person on the planet like you.”

Hesitant to correct him, Danny bit his tongue. It was true that Vlad was a person who had unfortunately gained the abilities of a ghost, things like floating, making objects move with his mind or using his spirit to control people while he slept safe and sound at home. And he’d gained them in a similar way to Danny as well, trusting the wrong people and delving into things he never fully understood and still didn’t.

It was just … less true for Danny was all.

But he wasn’t going to tell them that, he wasn’t going to tell anyone that. So how did whoever, or whatever this was, know? Or was it just saying things to get under his skin, that was pretty par for the course when it came to ghosts. So why wasn’t it doing anything else? Trying to get them to leave? Was Sam right? Was it really a trap this entire time? What would happen if they went back downstairs and tried the door, would it open?

He grabbed the paper and shoved it into one of his jackets pockets, there was plenty of time to freak out over it later after all. “Let’s keep looking around, there has to be something here that it’s trying to distract us from.”

Unfortunately, there wasn’t anything more useful than there had been downstairs. Just what one would expect from a normal office. What papers he did find had detailed extensive notes, yes. But they were in a language Danny couldn’t read and neither Sam nor Tucker even recognized. It was infuriating!

Almost like whoever was haunting this place, was telling them it had all the answers they wanted but wouldn’t give them any. He just wanted to know how - Danny shook his head. There had to be something. He wouldn’t have been led all the way here, had all those dreams, if there was nothing he could do at all.

He threw one more frustrated look around the office before he threw the stack of papers he’d been digging through on the floor and marched over to the next door. It was unlocked, again, just like all of the others and it only served to increase Danny’s frustration.

“Wait, Danny,” Sam noticed him leaving and quickly followed, the door slammed shut behind them, locking Tucker inside the office.

“No,” he whispered, this was all his fault, he shouldn’t have let this ghost get in his head like this! He never should have let his emotions take him over, he knew better. It led to bad things. Horrible, terrible, things.

There was a loud bang on the door, someone was pounding against it and Danny flinched. Was the actual haunting finally starting? Was everything really just a way to lure them deeper into the tower and away from each other?

“Guys?” he heard Tucker call out from the other side of the door, “did you seriously just leave me behind? Don’t we have like, a rule against that?!”

Danny sighed in relief, it was just Tucker. “Are you okay Tuck? Did anything happen over there when the door shut? Any oozing walls or flying papers-”

There was another thump, probably Tucker banging his head against the door, “I know what to look for Danny I’ve been doing this the exact same amount of time as you.”

“Yeah yeah,” Danny acquessed. “Just get to the stairs and we’ll meet you there.”

He exchanged a glance with Sam, she was glaring a hole into the side of his head and he felt guilty for being the cause of everything going wrong, again. So he apologized and ignored her exaggerated eye roll when she said he should have known better, because well, he did. But what was he going to do, apologize twice?

The room they were in was a simple one, likely some kind of storage space that he and Sam could dig through for hours on end, but it was more important to get to Tucker than to try and make sure they didn’t miss anything.

Which, in hindsight, was probably exactly why they’d been separated.

A cold breeze tickled at Danny’s hair and he felt himself relax despite it all. It felt nice, the cold, and Danny liked when the haunts they went to leaned towards the chillier side like this. Sometimes, especially if Vlad was involved, it felt like he was walking into an overwarm swamp when he entered a haunt and it made him itchy and uncomfortable the entire time. Vlad never seemed to notice, and his friends complain equally about both, so Danny had mostly kept it to himself.

The entire tower felt nice, cold dry air, the smell of books, ink, and cookies, even the playful, excited feeling that seemed to permeate throughout the tower. Like someone had designed it to appeal in every way to both sides of Danny’s instincts.

It was unnerving.

He followed Sam out of the room and back into the middle where the stairs were, but Tucker wasn’t there.

Sam pulled out her phone, and Danny held his breath as it rang, once, twice, and then a click and Tucker’s familiar, annoyed voice came through the speaker and Danny sighed in relief. “Uh guys? I couldn’t get out the door so I tried to climb out a window, and there was uh, a ladder. So I’m outside right now. Come get me?”

Danny met eyes with Sam and nodded, they headed back down, “we’re coming Tuck,” he said.

“Cool, cool, actually rather than coming to get me, can we just go home? Come back later, like in the day time? How come we never do these things in the daytime?”

“You know that’s not how ghosts work Tucker.” Sam said, bored, as they walked to the front door. Danny felt a tug, something like a hand on his shoulder and turned to see what was behind him. There wasn’t anything there.

He turned back around to see that Sam had already walked outside, and was holding the door open for him, one of her eyebrows raised. Awkwardly, Danny jogged a little, so as to not hold them up too long. But before he could actually walk outside the door slammed shut.

Sam screamed.

“Danny! Are you okay!” Tucker asked, his voice panicked and muffled from the other side of the door.

“I’m fine,” Danny said, gritting his teeth and turning around. The room didn’t look or feel any different. There was nothing screaming at him to get out or anything else malicious. If anything it seemed even cosier than before, and Danny didn’t really know how to react to that.

He looked back at the door. There was a way, no. He couldn’t do that. Danny pinched at the bridge of his nose, the only thing to do, really, was to see who had invited him in. That’s what it was right? Some kind of weird ghostly invite?

“I’m going to go check upstairs,” he called out to his friends before walking back towards the staircase.

They pounded on the door, “Danny don’t you dare go up there without us! Just wait, we’ll find a way in! It’s dangerous alone!”

Ignoring their protests Danny took the stairs two steps at a time, fighting the rising excitement in his chest and firmly planting his feet against the polished wood. There were answers waiting for him, he knew there were. He just had to find them.

The third floor had a bedroom, it was nice, cozy and the bed even looked inviting. Danny didn’t bother to stay long. Whoever it was that called him here wasn’t in this room, nor were they in the next or the one after that. Just two bedrooms and a bathroom on that floor and Danny quickly made his way to the next.

This room was different from the rest. For one there were windows, everywhere, that seemed to play different scenes of different people from all over the world. If Danny strained his ears, he could even hear them speaking different languages. On the other side from the windows was an entire wall of clockwork that chimed and churned as the gears moved, keeping the face of the clock on the outside ticking along in sync with the rest of the world.

When Danny stepped into the room properly the carpet sunk easily underneath his feet and he felt a nice, cold breeze that came from a purple flamed fire housed properly in a fireplace in the middle of the room. He hadn’t even noticed a chimney from outside.

There was a man in front of the fire. He was tall and hooded and he carried an equally tall and gnarled staff in one of his gloved hands. Danny felt himself freeze, he had never seen a ghost this solid before. There was always a little bit of transparency, no matter how powerful, they didn’t have physical forms afterall. Not like Danny.

“Who are you?” he asked. His voice was dry and soft and Danny was thankful when it didn’t crack on his question. How embarrassing would that have been?

The man turned around, his face changing as he did from old and aged to a younger one, closer to his parent’s age, a large jagged scar marking it’s way through one of his eyes and down his cheek. He smiled, “I am Clockwork, Master of time. All that was, All that is, and All that will be. I understand you have many questions for me. I hope to answer them.”

A thousand questions ran rapidly through his mind, why did you call me here? Did you call me here? Why get rid of my friends? What are you and why haven’t I seen anything like you before?

“How do I prevent myself from becoming that.” Danny asked the most pressing question first, desperate. The man-ghost-Clockwork, sighed and gestured for him to sit. There was a comfortable looking couch with an equally comfortable chair across from it and a plate of cookies set on an elegantly carved coffee table between the two.

“That’s easily answered, sit, have a cookie.” Clockwork floated over, crossing his legs and settling into the chair before grabbing a cookie for himself.

Danny glanced at them, uncertain, before taking a seat. The couch was even more comfortable than it looked and he found himself sinking back into it, confused. The room was a nice, cold, temperature as well, despite the fire clearly burning in the fireplace.

He grabbed one of the cookies, “can I eat these?” he asked, looking over at his host.

“Of course,” Clockwork smiled, taking a bite of his own before leaning back, “I made them for you. Though your friends would have to be more careful, I’m not sure what food like this would do to a human.”

“I am human,” Danny argued, placing the cookie back on its plate. He had to, denial was all he had left at this point.

Clockwork frowned, “yes, well, I suppose we’ll get there next. You wanted to know about your dreams.”

Finally, Danny nodded, “they’re different ever since- uh well… ever since the incident.”

“It’s natural to not want to talk about one’s death,” Clockwork said, he leaned forward and tilted his head, “or one’s birth.”

“My dreams,” Danny asked, avoiding that conversation with all the grace of a blind hippo, “why are they different. You know right?”

Sighing, Clockwork nodded and leaned back, “yes, I know everything. They’re different, frankly, because they’re dreams. It’s unsettling to you because it’s new, you’ve never dreamed before.”

Danny scowled, “that doesn’t make any sense, I had plenty of dreams when-”

Clockwork interrupted him, disappointment plain under his hood, “You can lie to your friends Daniel, but I already know the truth. Just as you do.”

“I was astral projecting. Like what Vlad does… but then why-?” Danny bit his tongue. He couldn’t say it, not outloud. It was too difficult, he’d spent too long hiding it, pushing it away and doing everything he could to keep anyone from noticing.

“Why can’t you do it anymore?” Clockwork answered for him, Danny nodded. “The simple answer is that you aren’t like Vladimir, despite what he believes and would like you to believe as well. But that’s something else you already know. Ask me a question you don’t have the answers for.”

Danny grabbed another cookie, biting into it fiercely just to have an excuse not to speak. It tasted really good, better than anything he’d had in a while and Danny wondered if maybe there was something in it meant to sate his less human cravings. The thought didn’t help his inner turmoil.

Clockwork smiled softly at him though and sighed, “Fine, in order to answer your question, first I have one of my own.”

“Didn’t you just say you know everything?” Danny mumbled before shoving more cookie in his mouth.

“What good is a teacher that only lectures?” Clockwork said in retort, “do you remember how you died?”

He did, of course he did. “Kinda hard to forget that. Lab accident, electrocution, nothing fancy.” he said, curling in on himself. Clockwork had been right before, it was painful to talk about. But he wanted, no, needed the answers to his questions. He’d survive this.

“Well, that’s where your first mistake lies. Yes, that is what stopped your heart, and likely the most memorable part, but you didn’t die from that Daniel. What killed you came after.”

Danny frowned, “that doesn’t make any sense? What happened after?”

“Your spirit was never particularly bound to your body in the first place, likely due to your parents dabbling where they shouldn’t for as long as they did before you were ever born. There was a summoning, I think you remember, that your parents were holding when your accident happened on the floor below them.”

It was frustrating, that he was right. That he knew it. “I remember them recognizing me, my spirit. I remember them finding my body and shoving me back in. I remember the pain, and waking up and seeing-” Danny choked on the realization. It couldn’t be...

“Seeing the world in your dreams?” Clockwork asked, “the way you saw it when you were a spirit, free from the confines of your body, correct?” He floated over the table, sat next to Danny, and placed a hand on his back. Danny realized he had been shaking.

He grabbed the fabric of his jeans in a tight grip and tried to stop, “It’s all real, right? It isn’t… I’m not still dreaming? Please, I need to know.”

The hand on his back pulled him close, tucked into Clockwork’s side and Danny felt comforted despite himself, he fought to blink away tears that had been building behind his eyes as he tucked himself into Clockwork’s side. He was so solid, unlike any other ghost Danny had ever met and he seemed to radiate comfort where most just gave off fear and hurt.

“You’re not dreaming Daniel, you never were. The world is different when you see it through our eyes, that is all. When you woke up, you weren’t human anymore. Of course you wouldn’t be limited by a human’s sight.”

Danny curled into himself tighter, despair clouding around him and likely leeching unpleasantly into the air. It would be a wonder if Clockwork didn’t feel it. “So I’m a ghost.”

“Hardly,” Clockwork said and Danny stopped breathing, “Do you think the world is so simple it is split between what is ghostly and what is not?”

“I…” Danny had actually assumed that. So far everything they’d dealt with so far, short of Vlad, had either been a ghost or spirit of some kind, or a human that used magic or ghostly artifacts. Even Vlad had simply been a person who had learned how to control his own spirit the way a ghost would. If Danny wasn’t a human, and he wasn’t a ghost, then what was he?

Clockwork ruffled his hair, “I suppose you’re young. It is easier, afterall, to think of it that way. But Daniel, ghosts don’t have physical forms. They can possess one, or control one, and sometimes even mimic one, but they are spirits.”

He sighed, “you are something entirely different. You’re something remarkable.”

Danny leaned back, using the sleeves of his hoodie to quickly dry his tears so he could look Clockwork in the eye, “What am I?”

“You’re new.”

Danny shoved him, “Agghh, I knew that you jerk!” It was probably a bad idea to attack or antagonize someone as clearly powerful and knowledgeable as Clockwork, but really he’d been asking for it. And Danny’s patience was only so strong.

Clockwork didn’t fight him back though, nor did he get offended. Instead he just smiled that soft smile that Danny was starting to realize was affection, and said, “did you? Weren’t you trying to read my books to find out if there was anyone else like you?”

“Well yeah-” Danny stopped, “Oh. There wouldn’t be anything would there? If I’m the first?”

He groaned, that really was just his luck. He��d never figure out anything at this rate. Clockwork, the bastard, just hummed and grabbed another cookie, offering it to him. “No there wouldn’t. But you’re not the only one who was the first or only of their kind. Who had to figure out on their own, who and what they are.”

“You mean Vlad?” Danny asked, the thought left a sour taste in his mouth, wow he really hoped he didn’t mean Vlad.

Clockwork’s smile turned brittle, “I don’t mean Vlad.”

Danny chuckled, his thoughts turning mischievous, “I don’t know, he seems pretty unique, what with all those different abilities he has and the way he can choose to be human or ghost-”

“Oh please,” Clockwork interrupted, “there’s plenty of humans like Vladimir Masters, you were fully capable of astral projecting like that from birth, no black magic necessary. Just because he found a way to twist-”

He stopped, then looked down at Danny who was trying and failing to hold back a shit eating grin. All at once the air seemed to leave him and he deflated, the irritated look on his face replaced with open and honest affection and Danny felt it sing in the air around them.

“You were messing with me.”

“To be fair I didn’t think it would work, all knowing and everything.” Danny said, unable to fight the bubbling feeling in his chest as it rose to meet the affection around them. Usually it sucked having the empathy of a ghost and being near one or at least, something with the same traits. The negative emotions tended to bounce between him and them and amplify and it always made Danny struggle to parse his own emotions from theirs. But right now, in the top of a clock tower with the most powerful entity Danny had ever met, he felt happiness and joy to a degree he’d long forgotten. It was dizzying. He was almost giddy with it.

Clockwork patted him on the head, purposefully messing his hair, “yes well. I think in time, it will be more obvious just how different you truly are, how crucial every small coincidence was that came together that night to create you. But until then, you had another question? I can answer it now.”

Danny frowned as he realized what Clockwork meant, “You! I asked that question first! How did you only answer the one you wanted to!!”

“It was important,” Clockwork said, relaxing into the couch next to Danny, “to answer that question I had to be sure you knew what you were.”

He sputtered, “But I don’t?! I’m just something new! Something different!”

“Something physical that exists with the laws of the spiritual.”

“Yeah!” Danny said, “Wait, what?”

Clockwork nodded his head, “a physical entity that exists within the realms of spiritual possibility. It must be such a struggle, to deal with both sets of instincts like that.”

Danny’s head hurt, it was too much to try and understand the details of all of this. Maybe Tucker was right and he should just have let it be, learn to live with the new normal his life was now. Wasn’t that kind of what Clockwork was suggesting anyways? Then again, unlike Tucker, he did seem to thrive off of all of Danny’s questions, whether he actually answered them or not.

“Yeah, I have to fight my more ghostly instincts all the time. It’s exhausting.” he said, leaning into Clockwork. It should have been embarrassing, seeking comfort like that, but he’d already cried into his shoulder and there wasn’t really any way to come back from that so Danny did as he pleased.

He felt Clockwork’s hand return to his back, a solid comforting presence, “Now why would you do that?”

Danny tilted his head in confusion, “what do you mean?”

“Why would you fight against one half of yourself so thoroughly? But embrace the other side entirely?” Clockwork elaborated. “Did you think there wouldn’t be any consequences in fighting against your nature?”

“But,” Danny struggled to speak, pieces of the puzzle he’d thought hopeless putting themselves together in ways he had never expected and didn’t quite understand, “my nature is bad.”

Clockwork frowned and turned to look at Danny properly, “Daniel, it’s your nature. There is nothing good or bad about it. It is only as it is. Everything is as it’s meant to be.”

This was too much, Danny sat up fully and turned entirely towards Clockwork, “are you saying, the way I become that thing from my nightmare, is by… doing what I’ve been doing to avoid becoming that thing?!”

“Yes,” Clockwork answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

He blinked, the answer really couldn’t be that easy. “But in my dream, I, my instincts-”

Clockwork grabbed a cookie and placed it in his hands, “even humans react poorly, when they starve themselves. As you exist now, you simply need a different kind of sustenance. One you’ve been denying.”

Danny felt dread crawl down the length of his spine, “what kind of sustenance?”

“Spirits exist for reasons, and they exist differently from humans. In order to keep existing they need emotions, experiences, something to keep them held together. A spirit that has no reason to exist will simply disappear, you’ve seen such before it is relatively common after all. But you can’t do that, since you are physical in a way that they are not. You can starve yourself endlessly, into madness even if you’re desperate enough.”

“I do it to myself?” Danny asked, flustered and frustrated. It was true then? He really was his own worst enemy?

Clockwork shook his head, “it is not inevitable Daniel. As you were, it was the most likely path forward. Yes. You would have noticed the symptoms, seen yourself losing control and then, in reaction, suppressed yourself further. Starved yourself further.”

Danny cringed, yeah, that sounded like him. “How do I stop it then? I just embrace what makes me ghostly? What about my parents? If they think they failed the resurrection, that I’m not human anymore, they’ll kill me for real! Or worse!”

“That is indeed troublesome, and the paths of the future where they know your truth are twisted and sharp, every small decision every tiny change causing a greater effect on their reactions as a whole. But you do not need to reveal yourself to your parents to live your truth.”

Relieved, Danny fell back into the couch. He hadn’t even noticed he’d floated off of it, was that good? Bad? He shook his head, this was all too confusing. “How then?” He asked, maybe this time he’d actually get a straight answer.

Clockwork ruffled his hair and stood up, er, well, floated up and over towards the fire. “You continue doing what you’re doing with your friends, protecting your town and interacting with the truth of the world around you. And…” He turned around, “you can come visit me. It’s quite lonely in the clock tower they trapped me in, and there is much I can teach you about becoming. I had to learn such things about myself once after all.”

“You’ll let me come back? To visit you?” Danny didn’t know what to say. He could come visit, ask more questions, get more answers. It seemed too good to be true, and Danny found himself eager and excited at the prospect.

For some reason, the entire conversation, he’d thought this would be a one time thing. That the clocktower would disappear behind him and leave any question he didn’t ask unanswered. To find out that wasn’t the case, that he had somehow, against all odds, made some kind of ghostly ally, was beyond expectations. “You’ll help me?”

The answering smile had Danny floating out of his seat, “Of course Daniel. I’ll even bake cookies.”

#Danny phantom #Clockwork #clockwork dp #Phic Phight #phic phight 21 #sam manson #tucker foley #op #Bee's writing

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black-coffee-and-sugar · 4 years ago

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Fair warning: it's a long post. Let's examine some of the reasons that Kara has cited why she didn't tell Lena the super secret:

1. She wanted to protect her

Now, this one has some legs on it as Kara specifically mentions it in S3 during a conversation with James and Mon-El. And there's definitely some truth to it. But it's also bullshit. Lena was in constant danger and put herself at risk to save/protect Kara who didn't actually need it. In fact, the first time Lena's mentioned (not shown just mentioned) it's in regards to the venture explosion - something that happened because Lex was trying to kill her. People have been trying to kill, kidnap, manipulate, threaten Lena since minute one. Knowing Kara = SG would not have severely worsened any of that. In fact, it might've helped ease Lena's anxieties and resulted in her taking less risks with her life. In fact, I'm surprised Lena didn't think that Kara's association with her was putting Kara at risk (a far more likely thing).

The 100th episode addresses this to some degree in one of the AUs. Lena tells Kara that she wouldn't have had to risk her life dealing with Sam/Reign alone if she'd known the truth and she's absolutely right. And sure, Lena could've told SG and the DEO when she pieced Reign = Sam together but ask yourself, why would she? What assurance did she have that the DEO would not have treated her BEST FRIEND like a hostile instead of someone in need of help? The DEO is guilty of this and they have a history of locking up aliens indefinitely and on occassion straight up murder. After Reign nearly killed their biggest asset (i.e. SG) why in the hell would Lena trust them with helping Sam? She wouldn't nor should she have. She didn't know that she could go to SG because remember, Lena doesn't think of her the same way she does of Kara. SG is not her best friend. She doesn't have a personal, humanized relationship with her (at least not that she knows of). And obviously she's not going to tell Kara the human reporter with the DEO agent sister about it either. And the kryptonite? SG lost her shit over it even though she's been working with the DEO who stockpiled the stuff until SM left with it (a dumbass move that would've bit them so hard in the ass with the WK situation if it weren't for Lena's kryptonite!). Plus, Kara didn't have an issue with Oliver having a kryptonite arrow, J'onn having a sword. But Lena? How dare she!

So yea no. I get that "I kept my secret to protect you" is a popular thing in the hero world but in the case of Kara and Lena, it doesn't make sense and it did make situations unnecessarily harder.

2. She didn't trust Lena

This is mentioned by Kara to William in a deleted scene from S5 but I think it's worth exploring. I'm not sure to what extent Kara means with this but it could be referring to the moments as SG where she did display a distrust of Lena's intentions and she used Lena's personal relationships against her (i.e. asking James to break into Lena's lab). I mentioned the S3 shitshow with the kryptonite which is where a lot of this started but there's also other scenes in that same season where SG pretty much calls into question the so-called trust she has in Lena despite claiming otherwise. The switch was so abrupt the minute she learned Lena not only had but knew how to make kryptonite. Did anyone ever consider why Lena would bother learning how to make kryptonite? I'd hazard a guess that it was something she was looking into even before Sam/Reign. I think she happened to find Lex's stock and she decided to learn how it works and why it affects the Supers like it does. That would explain how Lena seems to be the ONLY ONE able to make an anti-kryptonite suit and other viable forms of the rock (i.e. Harun el). But no, SG and others immediately jump to the worst conclusions and associate the endeavour with Lena's last name, something SG KNOWS Lena is sensitive about it. And then the harun el. SG was suddenly fine with Lena making it when it was to split Sam from Reign and save Argo from extinction. But when it was used for something else that Lena didn't clue her in on (and what do you know, Alex, Brainy and James didn't either and they KNEW what Lena was doing with it) she got back on her high horse and the distrust became front and centre. You can't trust Lena as Kara and then immediately distrust her as SG and expect her to be accepting of this dichotomy. I'm surprised the woman managed to retain her sanity.

And still, this reasoning doesn't quite hit the mark in comparison to every other insistence of Kara believing in Lena (from day one she even told Clark that she believed Lena after meeting her for the first time). But the contrasting opinions and actions must have given Lena pause. I don't blame her to call into question which version of the truth was real and choosing to believe the worst. It's what SG and the SFs have been doing to her.

3. She was wary of Lena

This isn't an explicitly given reason but I do think it's how the secret keeping started in S2. Frankly, I don't even blame Kara for not showing her full deck in the beginning because she (and even us as an audience) didn't know much about Lena beyond wanting to do good and not be like her family. So no, Kara not telling Lena in the beginning actually makes sense to me (though she told Nia in a split second but that's neither here nor there). For me, I started to seriously take Lena at her word after the Medusa episode. That would've been the perfect opportunity for her to show the true "xenophobic" colours some parts of the fandom accuse her of having and she didn't do it. I don't think she even got so much as a thank you for it. People praise SM for getting Lex arrested but ultimately it was Lena's testimony that got him thrown behind bars. Same thing with Lillian! And yes, the daxamite invasion was facilitated by Lena unwittingly working with Rhea but she fixed it with the lead dispersal bomb, a device she allowed SG the privilege of using or not. So Kara and the SFs being cautious about Lena really should've evaporated halfway through S2 (and it did for Kara at least). In fact, the daxamite invasion may not have happened if Lena knew exactly who Rhea was and her relation to Mon-El because they would've warned Lena about it. Lena did want Kara's advice on Rhea and she would've waited for it if she knew what was going on (i.e. Alex being held hostage) and hell, might've been able to fix it in typical Lena ex machina fashion.

4. She didn't want to lose her

This is probably as close to the truth as we've gotten and it's actually part of her confession in 5x01 (something her outburst in 5x19 tries to undo). But the thing is, Kara KNEW this was a possibility and yet, continued walking towards the deadly cliff with her eyes wide open. The probability of losing Lena got higher and higher as time went on and it was always inevitable. There was always this spotlight placed on Kara telling Lena or Lena finding out on her own but there was always a HUGE chance that Lillian would've told her. Or Lex, which is exactly what happened. And Kara knew that they knew and yet she did nothing about it. The minute kara found out Lillian knew she should've taken action, what guarantee did she have that Lillian wouldn't have gotten bored of waiting for Lena to piece it together? How can they just leave Lillian with dangerous knowledge like that is beyond me. When Alex in particular has made such a big deal about people knowing, didn't want Kara telling Lena, only allowed Kara to tell Lucy to save J'onn and yet, letting Lillian amble about with this info is okay??? Nothing was stopping her from telling Lena or it slipping during one their chess games and definitely nothing stopping Lex from dropping that bomb.

The 100th episode AUs showed us that each time it was Kara telling the truth, no matter how hurt and upset Lena rightfully was, she was ultimately fine with it. And Kara ends up losing her to death, not because Lena walked away. How this wasn't the takeaway message for Kara after that adventure, idk. It was Kara's hesitatancy in telling Lena that allowed Lex to weaponize this secret and twist it into something it never was. And yes, Kara doesn't owe a damn soul her secret and has rarely ever been given the chance to tell anyone on her own terms (James - told by SM, Alex, J'onn, Brainy, Mon-El, the Legion - always knew, Lex & Lillian, Lord & Cat - found out somehow). She only ever got to tell Winn, Lucy and Nia and I'm sorry but none of those people have ever proven themselves trustworthy at the time of the reveal the way Lena has.

So while Kara is every right to keep her secrets, she was wrong to insert herself in Lena's life if she never had any intention of telling her and let's be honest, it really didn't seem like Kara had any timeline on that front.

5. She was selfish

Similar to the above and also mentioned during the confession but this is even deeper. Lena was something of an outlet for Kara, a way to feel completely normal, something she hasn't been able to experience with anyone, even Mon-El. Can you imagine being a cub reporter who knows powerful CEO Lena Luthor and having said CEO choose to spend time with you? Choose to let you interview her when she's wary of the press (remember her interactions with Clark in 2x01 and her family history)? Choose to treat your problems as important and valid and human? I don't blame Kara at all for being selfish with Lena, for wanting to keep Lena all to herself like that. But to not share the other aspects of herself was seriously wrong too and resulted in this imbalance in their relationship. To Lena, it looks like she was giving all of herself when Kara was not. It looks like she put all her trust and vulnerabilities out there when Kara didn't. It looks like Kara was using her (which let's be real, she kinda did a few times in S2 with the fight club and bs article to get info on Lillian and then ofc the CatCo-Edge problem she visited Lena for after ignoring her and proceeding to continue the rejection after Lena said she'd look into it).

You think post-reveal Lena didn't think back to all those moments and have those kinda thoughts? Even called into question what might've been the real reason James dated her and Kara was so insistent on befriending her? Were there perhaps times were she figured it out and can't remember and what's why she chose not to see it? Why do we think she still showed up game night in 4x22 instead of confronting Kara? Because these thoughts amongst others must've been swarming her mind and the only way to keep the upper hand is to continue playing dumb. So yes, Kara made the conscious decision to be selfish with Lena because of the unexpected connection they forged and I get it totally. But Lena has never been selfish and she's always made hard efforts to be a damn good friend (and she was idc what others might think on that) and open herself up to Kara despite how difficult and frankly foreign that is for her.

So are Kara's reasons valid? To a point, I would say yes but their validity waned over the seasons to the point where the secret keeping didn't even make sense anymore.

So was Lena's anger valid? Yes! 100% it was and honestly, I'm surprised she managed to keep it together for so long. I couldn't. But her anger doesn't justify her actions (mind control, manipulating Kara, threatening Russell, holding J'onn's bro captive, putting Hope inside Eve) and how she went out of her way to hurt Kara back. However, I get why she did it though it's worth pointing out that this is the only instances of a betrayal in her life where Lena has gone this far. Bitch straight up spiralled where previously she would cut ties and move the fuck on with life. But with Kara, that doesn't even seem to manifest itself to Lena as an option. Will the show ever address the obvious WHY for this and for Kara being so so terrified of losing Lena (like honestly I have never seen Kara look more distressed).

Maybe, maybe not but regardless I'm not buying this platonic friends nonsense because no one is that devastated over a friendship. Many of us (myself included) have experienced falling outs with very close friends and breakups. Which one do you think the Kara/Lena rift in S5 felt like? It was full on heartbreak, loving someone in complete torment and not being able to stop despite wanting to because even though it's painful, the alternative is infinitely worse.

MB and KM's acting choices aside, these idiot showrunners have brought us to this point with their own narrative and the only logical next step is to make them canon.

Lol okay I'm done.

#long ass post i know #but i had to get this all out #because i just can't look at canon events any other way #its all led to this from 'and who are you exactly?' and it hasn't slowed down #kara's ultimate underlying reason is that she's dangerously in love and i will die on that hill #supercorp #coffee speaks

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atlafan · 5 years ago

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Office Neighbors - Part Ten

a/n: okay A LOT happens in this part, lots of tension, please don’t be mad at me (reblogs and feedback are super helpful!)

warnings: angst, fluff, and smut

words: 17K

masterpost

“They’re gonna know.” You say as you frantically try to fix your smudged makeup on the car ride back to the cabin.

“They’re not gonna know.” Harry chuckles.

“They’re gonna know!”

“How would they know?”

You make a scoffing noise at him.

“Let’s see, my mascara has run down my cheeks, and my hair looks awfully fucked up. We’re also later than we said we’d be.” You look at him and reach your hand out to smooth out some of his hair.

“We’ll just tell them we got a bite to eat. Just go straight to our room. The lights will probably be dimmed when we get in anyways.” He takes your hand and kisses it. “It’s not a big deal.”

“It’s embarrassing, I don’t want them to know.”

“What’s embarrassing about having a quickie in the car?”

“It’s like we were teenagers with no self-control.” You mutter.

“Was kind of nice to do something so spontaneous. Suppose it was my fault for making things difficult in the gondola. If Mum and Dad scold us, I’ll take the blame.” He smirks.

“But if you do that, they’ll never let me see you again! You’ll have to start sneaking in through the window.”

“It’ll be worth if it means I get to see you.” He winks and you start laughing. “Oh! Just say you laughed so hard you cried if they ask.”

“They’ll never believe that! You really are a narcissist if you think you’re that funny.” You smirk. Harry glares at you and it makes you laugh harder.

“Yeah, I’m not funny at all.” He says facetiously.

You take a deep breath once you’re back at the house. The lights were definitely dimmed, so maybe no one would really notice how fucked up you looked.

“Hey, you two.” Paige smiles. She was all snuggled up with Noah on the couch. “The kids are in bed already, they were exhausted. You should have seen it, Harry.” She pouts. “Noah had to carry both of them off to bed, and Andy even let me tuck him in, it was so sweet.”

“He sure is cute when he’s drowsy.” Harry agrees. “Well, we’re gonna go to sleep to, so-“

“How was the gondola ride?” Noah asks.

“It was great, I would highly recommend it.”

“Maybe we should take everyone tomorrow night since it’s our last night.” Noah says to Paige.

“Yeah!” She squints over at you. “Are you feeling alright, Y/N?”

“You know,” Harry puts his arm around you, “she got a little nauseous on the way down, it’s why we’re a little late coming back, I had to drive slower. So we’re gonna head to bed now.” He smiles and starts walking with you to your room.

“Hmm.” Paige says. “She goes to bed early a lot and now she’s nauseous.”

“You think she’s pregnant?”

“Maybe.” She shrugs. “We’re all going out for dinner tomorrow, we could see if she orders a drink or something.”

You and Harry scurry into your room, and you feel like you can breathe again.

“Nice save.” You say to him as you start to get undressed. “Mind if I use the bathroom first? I have to pee so bad.”

“Go for it.” He chuckles.

Once you’re both settled in bed you lay your head on Harry’s chest with a sigh. He rubs your back as you both slowly drift off.

After getting some skiing in, and taking the kids tubing, you all get ready for a nice dinner in the small resort town. It was a Chinese food place that offered buffet, so it was perfect for everyone. The kids loved piling up their plates. You did order a cocktail, so that squashed any thoughts Paige and Noah had of you being pregnant.

The kids talk about what they liked most about their week away, as do all of the adults. The food is excellent, and everyone has a good time.

“Andy, did you wanna come back with us tomorrow, or go with Dad and Y/N?” Paige asks as Harry and Noah quietly squabble over the check.

“Um, well, I think Brandon wanted to hang out tomorrow night, so I’ll go with Dad.”

“Alright, honey. What did Brandon do over break?”

“His family goes skiing at Loon.”

“What about Caroline?”

“Mum, why is this turning into twenty questions?”

“It’s not, baby, I was just-“

“Well, stop.” He picks around at the peas on his fork.

“Andy…” You put your hand on his shoulder. “She was just asking you a question.”

“She doesn’t need to know every little thing.” You give him a look, and he rolls his eyes before he looks at Paige again. “She stayed home, went sledding a few times, and her sisters drove her down to the mall, okay?”

“There’s a boy at Hebrew school that thinks I’m cute.” Rachel says. This catches Noah’s attention, which means Harry wins the bill, just like he wanted.

“What?”

“Yeah, you know David? He told me so.”

“Rachel, you’re way too young for boys to be telling you that you’re cute.” Noah frowns.

“But it’s okay for Andy to have a girlfriend? He’s only a year older than I am.” She huffs.

“Okay, what do you say we head out, yeah?” Harry says. “Everything’s all set.” You and Harry stand up as does everyone else.

“You get everything you want.” Rachel mumbles to Andy as they leave the restaurant.

“What are you talking about?”

“Everyone’s extra nice to you, and then when it comes to me I have a ton of rules to follow. It’s not fair.”

“Sorry your dad is more strict than mine, that’s not my fault.”

“No, it’s because I’m a girl and you’re a boy, and boys get whatever they want.”

“Rach, I-“

“Whatever.” She rolls her eyes.

Everyone gets in their cars to head back to the cabin, and Andy follows Rachel into the bunk room.

“Do you really think I get whatever I want?”

“What does it matter what I think?” She sits down on her bed and looks at him. “You know, I’m glad you’re going back with your dad for the rest of the weekend. It’s better when you’re not around.”

“Do you really mean that?” He sits down next to her.

“You don’t care.” She looks away. “You don’t even like me, Andy.”

“That’s not true…I like you.” She looks at him and gives him an unconvinced face. “I do! Look, I know when you and your dad first moved into my mum’s house, I wasn’t-“

“You literally asked to move out a month later. I was excited to not be the only kid around because my dad works so much, and you just left! You’re not the only one that feels sad sometimes, you know? And I hate it when you say ‘my mum’, guess what? She’s mine too.” She crosses her arms and Andy’s eyebrows raise. “You can be such a brat sometimes.”

“You sure are just letting it all out…”

“Yeah, I’m gonna keep letting it all out. You’re not even nice to my dad half the time, do you know how much that bothers me? He tries so hard to make sure you’re happy, and you don’t even care.”

“Maybe he should try less then. I don’t need him trying to impress me.”

“No, but it makes Mom happy to see you happy, so that’s why he does it. Y/N does the same exact thing.”

“No she doesn’t.” Andy scoffs. “Y/N’s my friend, she understands me.”

“You just like her because you like your dad better.”

“That’s not true!”

“Yes it is! It’s so obvious, and you don’t even care how much it kills Mom!” Rachel stands up and so does Andy.

“Stop calling her that! She’s not your mum and she never will be!”

“Newsflash, this summer she officially will be and there’s nothing you can do about it!”

The two of them stare at each other angrily. Rachel had never really spoken up to Andy like this before. Guess she was sick of his shit.

“You’re a spoiled brat.” She spits. “You never speak to Mom nicely, or it’s rare if you do.” She starts tearing up. “You have no idea how lucky you are to have a mom that loves you as much as she does, and now you have Y/N. I may have been little when my mom died, but I miss her every single day, and your mom…well…she takes a lot of that way.”

“Shit…it was around this time of year…wasn’t it? When your mum-“

“I don’t wanna talk about.” She wipes a few tears away. “You know what’s really annoying? I still feel like that you’re basically my brother. I just wish you felt the same way about me.”

She goes into her dresser, grabs her things for bed, and goes into the bathroom to do her thing.

“Kids! We have ice cream for you!” Paige shouts.

Rachel comes out in her pj’s and looks at Andy.

“Well? Are we having ice cream?” She says.

“Wait…” He puts his hand on her shoulder. “I’m really sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“I am…I…guess I don’t always realize when I’m being rude. I’ve been coming around to things a lot more. I’m happy that Mum is marrying your dad because he makes her happy. That’s all I want for her, for both my parents. I know how lucky I am…and…maybe I didn’t want a sister at first. When you both started coming around more, I felt like I was being replaced. Like Mum liked you better because she finally had a daughter or something, and then when you moved in…I took the easy way out and ran to my dad instead of dealing with everything. But…it’s the best thing I could have done. I’m a lot happier with him.” He smiles at her. “Isn’t this what brothers and sister do? They fight sometimes…”

“You don’t see me as a sister…”

“Sure I do.” He shrugs. “You’re my annoying little sister, and I’m your bratty older brother. It’s perfect.” He throws an arm around her. “Come on, let’s go get some ice cream.”

“Okay.” She smiles and walks with him. “Sometimes you need to remember that we’re on the same side.”

“Yeah…we are, aren’t we?”

“Was everything okay in there?” Harry asks. “Thought I heard shouting…” He sizes the both of them up.

“Oh! We were just fighting over who could use the bathroom first, Uncle Harry.” Rachel giggles. “I won, though.”

The kids smile at each other and sit down at the table to make up their bowls of ice cream. After everyone’s done, Andy helps Paige clean up in the kitchen.

“Mum?”

“Yes, honey?”

“I’m sorry for being rude at the table earlier…”

“Oh…well, I’m not going to say it’s alright because I really don’t like it when you speak to me that way. You do it your father too, and I really don’t like that.”

“I know…I don’t know why I do it, it just happens. I feel really bad about it…” He looks up at her, and she smiles at his sweet face. “I…I love you, Mum.”

“Oh, baby, I love you too.” They throw their arms around each other. “I hate that you’re getting older. Your attitude is only going to get worse.” She chuckles.

“And you’ll still love me?”

“Of course I will, do you promise to still love me?”

“Yeah.” He smiles up at her. “I promise.”

It was a great week away, and you enjoyed bonding with everyone, but you were happy to be heading home.

“Har, just drop me off at my place, yeah?” You say as he takes the exit for your town.

“Oh…really?”

“Yeah, I wanna do laundry, and I need to go grocery shopping, and then I need to get some work done.”

“You can literally do all of that back at my place.”

“Harry, I’d like to go back to my place.”

“Okay.”

Harry gets out of the car to help you with your things once he’s pulled up to your complex. He walks you up to the door.

“Did I do something wrong?”

“What?! No, babe, I just, you know, it was a really social week. I’m tired and I have things to do. It’s nothing personal.”

“Alright.”

“I love you.” You smile. “I had such a good time. I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?” He nods and lets you kiss him goodbye, but you knew he wasn’t thrilled you weren’t coming back over. “Please don’t be upset.”

“I’m not.” He kicks some rocks on the ground. “Was just sort of hoping to be alone since Andy’s going to the movies with Brandon later.”

“Come over later then.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” You smile. “We can, uh, finally use that candle.” You wink at him and go into your building, leaving him completely flustered.

Harry smiles and gets back in the car.

“Dad, I’m gonna need some extra money tonight…”

“Oh? Gonna load up on snacks at the movies?” He chuckles.

“No…we’re going on a double date, and I’d like to offer to pay for Caroline like how you do for Y/N.”

“A double date at the movies?! You can have the money, but there better not be any funny business. I want a full synopsis from start to finish, and-“

“I’m not going to make out with her, no worries there.”

“Good…it’s not nice to swap spit like that in such a public space.”

“So, you’ve never made out at the movies?”

“Uhh, well, I was a little older than you so-“

“Enough said, I don’t need to know.”

Harry and Andy get into the house and put some of their things away. Harry ends up laying down on his bed for a bit to read and relax, and Andy comes in lay down next to him, twiddling his thumbs.

“What’s up, buddy?”

“Nothing…does something have to be up?”

“No, but you don’t exactly come in to snuggle with me anymore.” He smirks.

“You can read me like a book, Dad.” Andy sighs. “I’m nervous for my date…”

“Why?”

“What if Brandon and Molly start kissing, and then Caroline expects me to kiss her?”

“You could tell B beforehand to maybe cool it with that stuff. Kids your age really shouldn’t be doing that as it is. Do you want me to talk with his parents?”

“No, that would be so embarrassing!”

“What movie are you even seeing?”

“The newest Pixar movie…”

“Alright, I bet it’ll be fine. If it gets weird at all, just call me, and I’ll come get you.”

“Thanks.” Andy says with relief. “I’ll probably sleepover at B’s after the movie, is that okay?”

“Sure.” Harry shrugs. “Just text me and let me know for sure. I’m gonna go to Y/N’s after I drop you off.”

“How come she didn’t just come here?”

“She just needed a little alone time. She gets tired when she’s been really social.”

“Have you talked with her about moving in at all?”

“I have, yeah…we talked about a lot of things a couple of weeks ago. She was thinking maybe July when her lease is up, how would you feel about that?”

“Yeah…why would she wanna wait that long?”

“She has a lot of work to do on her PhD. You may not remember when I was working on mine, but it’s a lot of hard work, and sometimes she needs her own space to get that work done. She’ll be done next May, though. We’re gonna paint together during our spring break, and we’re gonna go furniture shopping soon. Oh! She even wants to take you on a little day trip to Boston sometime soon.”

“Really? That would be so much fun! We haven’t been to Boston in forever.”

“I know! See, it’s all working out. She just needs some time and I wanna make sure I don’t put too pressure on her.”

“I’m really glad she came with us this week. She was so much fun when we went tubing.”

“Yeah, thought she was nearly gonna bounce outta that thing.” He laughs.

“Were you just reading in here?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Do you mind if I just lay in here for a bit? Forgot how comfy your bed is.” Andy yawns and pulls one of the quilts up over himself.

“Course.” Harry smiles and smooths some hair away from Andy’s face.

“Andy, thank you so much for paying for my ticket, that was so sweet of you.” Caroline tells him. “At least let me pay for the popcorn.”

“No worries, I got it.” He smiles. “Do you want to, um, share a slushie?”

“Sure.” She blushes. “I like getting the blue and red mixed.”

“Me too! It tastes like grape.”

“Yeah!”

They both giggle as they get into the snack line. Brandon and Molly were just getting their snacks. Brandon’s parents were off seeing a movie that was for adults. They all go in and grab their seats. The boys sit next to each other, and the girls sit on their other sides. Brandon almost immediately puts his arm around Molly and she giggles. Andy rolls his eyes and tries to get comfortable. Caroline reaches for his hand and he smiles as he takes it.

“You have a little tan from skiing.” Caroline points out. “It’s cute.”

“Oh, uh, thanks. The goggles will do that.” He leans forward to take a sip of the slushie. “I…missed you while I was gone. I’m sorry I didn’t get to call you much.”

“Oh! That’s okay. I know you were busy. I missed you too.” She smiles and leans in to give him a kiss on the cheek. “How were things with your…do you call her your step-sister?”

“Yeah, and her name’s Rachel.”

“Since when do you refer to her as your step-sister?” Brandon butts in.

“We had a heart to heart.” Andy shrugs. “She’s not a baby to me anymore, she’s pretty cool, actually.”

“Oh, well, that’s good, I guess.” Brandon says. “I’m glad you guys are doing better.”

“Me too.”

The theater gets darker as the previews come on, and they all pay attention to the screen. Andy felt at peace, he wasn’t sure why he was so worked up before. This was totally chill.

Harry shows up to your place with a bottle of wine and pizza. He lets himself in, and is very confused when he sees all the lights off.

“Y/N?!” He flips the lights on and sets everything down in the kitchen. “Baby?!” He goes down the hall and sees the light on in your office. “Babe?” You were passed out with your face in a book and a highlighter in your hand. Harry sighs and comes over to lift you up.

“Huh?!”

“It’s just me!”

“You nearly made me shit myself, Harry, Christ. You can just so easily pick me up?”

“You’re not that heavy.” He chuckles and sets you down. “I was just gonna tuck you in.”

“Well, I’m awake now. Sorry, I was working and I must have fallen asleep.”

“I brought pizza…and wine, but we don’t have to-mph!”

You tugged Harry close to you by his collar, and slotted your mouth over his.

“Pizza and wine sounds incredible.” You grin. “You always know exactly what I need.” You walk out of the office and he follows you. “Oh, and you got the white, you must really wanna get busy.”

“Why do you always think I have an ulterior motive?” He grabs two plates and two glasses.

“Because all men do. Sex is always on your minds?”

“And it’s not on yours?”

“Well, it wasn’t until I started dating you. Now I just always feel absolutely feral.” You smirk as you bite into a slice of pizza.

“Feral, huh?”

“Mhm, although, as a woman I can hide it much easier. I don’t have to worry about an appendage getting excited.” You take a sip of wine and so does Harry.

“No, but…” He comes over to stand behind you to speak into your ear. “You do have to worry about your panties getting wet.” His fingers trail down your body and up under your shirt. They skim the waistline of your sweatpants.

“That would involve me having to wear panties.”

“How do you feel about cold pizza?”

“Love it.”

“Fantastic.” Harry takes the pizza box and shoves it in the fridge, and then grabs you to throw you over his shoulder.

“Harry!” You squeal.

“You know me, I get a little excited.” He chuckles as he carries you into your room. “Babe…” He puts you down. Your room was a fucking mess.

“Okay, before you say anything, it looks like this because I’ve been going through my stuff.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t wanna do it last minute when we eventually move in together. Plus, I have a ton of clothes I don’t wear anymore that I can donate…I’m sorry, you must think I’m so messy.”

“I don’t.” He tucks some hair behind your ear. “I just hate that you’re basically staying here for your home office. You have no problem using mine at the house.”

“But what if we both need to work at the same time?”

“Plenty of room for your desk up there, baby.”

“I feel like we’re rushing and it kind of scares me a little.”

“There’s still no rush…move when you’re ready.”

“You say that, but I know you hate it when I’m here…and I sort of hate it too. I prefer sleeping next to you.” You bite your bottom lip.

“So do I.” He sighs. “What about…over spring break?”

“We’re supposed to paint, moving will take so much work. I don’t know what I wanna do with all my furniture yet…I was thinking of bringing some of it to the consignment shop.”

“What if we put your living room furniture up in the loft? It could look really nice up there, and the TV could go into the basement.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I want you there, and so does Andy. I know it’s stressful and scary, I’m a little scared too, but I want this. I just want you around.”

You pout up at him and wrap your arms around his neck. You hug him close to you.

“I’ll think about it, okay?”

“Sounds good to me.” He kisses you. “Now, I think we came in here for a reason.”

“We sure did.” You peck his lips and let him go. “Take your clothes off.” You go over to your side table and take out a candle and a lighter. “Feel like getting a little freaky?”

“Will it hurt?” He asks, already taking his shirt off.

“Harry, you have a fuck ton of tattoos and you’re scared of a little wax?”

“What kind of wax is it?”

��It’s, like, rose oil. It doesn’t hurt, it’ll just feel warm. You can use it for massages and stuff too.”

“Are you telling me you’re offering to rub my back?”

“Yes.”

“Alright, I’m in.” He smiles and strips down to his boxers. He gets on the bed and lays on his stomach. He puts his glasses on the night table.

You sit on top of his bum and let the candle burn while you get some lotion on your hands. You knead Harry’s shoulders and work your hands down his back.

“Feels so good, baby.”

“Are you ready for the wax?”

“Yeah, go for it.”

“Okay.” You feel giddy. You get off him and take your clothes off. “Flip onto your back, and get your underwear off. If I’m naked, you’re naked.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He smirks and does as you say.

You straddle him and grab the candle. His hands grip your hips, and he squeezes you in anticipation. Your pour the wax, carefully, onto your chest and let it drip down onto his. His mouth hangs open as he watches. It sort of mimicked his come dripping down your body, and that pleased him very much.

“Do it again.” He says.

“You liked it?”

“Yeah…it’s really sexy.”

You smile and pour a little more over your chest and watch it drip onto his. You stick your hand in the wax and let the droplets fall from your fingertips onto his torso. You watch as his stomach tightens.

“Not too hot?”

“No it just feels like warm water…I thought the point of these were for them to hurt a little.”

“That’s what some people use them for. I just like how warm it feels on my skin.”

“Yeah, it does feel kind of good. Do a little more.”

You pour just a little more onto him and set the candle down. You lean down and kiss him, and his hands slide up your back. You suck on his bottom lip and grind yourself against him, making him groan.

“Gotta get a condom.” He mumbles against your mouth.

“Yeah, we probably should.” You say into his ear as you kiss on his neck. “Or…you could pull out and come on back.”

He smiles and nods at you. You get off him and lay on your side, looking over your shoulder. He gets on his side behind you, and lines himself up with you so he can slide in.

“You wanted it like this, huh?” He asks as he grips your hip and rocks in and out of you.

“Yes, Harry.” You hook arm around his head so you can grip his hair.

His hand on your hip slides to your clit, and he rubs slow circles on you. You moan out from the feeling. He sponges his lips on your neck, biting and sucking on your tender skin. You both were grunting and panting. Feel Harry raw was like nothing else, and this angle was sending you.

“Fuck, oh my god.” You moan and your head rolls back against his shoulder. “Say it, Harry, please.”

“You’re such a good girl, Y/N.” He says right into your ear.

“Whose good girl am I?”

“Mine, you’re my good girl.”

“Fuck, yes, I’m yours, I’m all yours.” You start panting more as he rubs your clit faster. “Fuck, I’m gonna!” You arch into him as you release around him.

“Y/N, I need to pull out, I can’t hold it much longer, baby.”

“Okay.” You breathe.

He pulls out and you roll onto your stomach for him. You hear him grunt and groan and you gasp when you feel his warm come shoot onto your back. You look over your shoulder and smile at him.

“Better than the candle?”

“Way better.”

“Let me go get a rag, be right back.”

“I have a better idea.” You say as you get up. “Let’s go take a bath together.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” You peck his lips. “Let’s just enjoy each other tonight.”

The movie was great, and Brandon’s parents let Andy and Brandon wait with Molly and Caroline to be picked up from the theater before driving them home. Once they’re at Brandon’s, they get settled into their pj’s and with some video games.

“That was a good movie.” Andy says.

“Yeah, it was really funny. We’ll have to all do it again.”

“Definitely. Would you ever wanna go to the pottery painting place? Y/N said she would take Caroline and I there.”

“You know, not everything needs to be a double date, Andy.” Brandon rolls his eyes.

“I thought you liked double dates.”

“I do, but…I don’t know, I don’t always need to hang out with Molly. I like when just you and I hang out.”

“Me too, I feel like we haven’t done anything just the two of us in a while.”

Brandon pauses the game and looks at Andy.

“Yeah, it’s like…girls have taken over.”

“I don’t even wanna hear it.” Andy laughs. “When you first dated Molly she was all you talked about, and you wanted me to go out with Alexis!”

“I just wanted you to feel included, and I missed you.” He shrugs.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah.”

“How come you guys broke up in the first place? Couldn’t have been that bad if she wanted to go back out with you.”

“She…she thought I liked spending time with you better, and she wanted me to basically not be friends with you anymore, and I chose to be friends with you instead of being her boyfriend. When I asked her to the dance I didn’t think we’d be full on back together, but I guess we are.”

“And does she still have a problem with me?”

“We haven’t talked about it.”

“I can’t believe you chose me over her.”

“I always will, Andy. You’re my best friend.” Andy blushes at that. “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah.”

“Why haven’t you and Caroline kissed yet? I know you said you didn’t want it to be public, but…”

“Y/N said it was okay not to rush into things.” He shrugs. “I just don’t feel ready for that.”

“You two act like you’re just friends…”

“Friends don’t hold hands and kiss on the cheek. I wanna kiss her, it just hasn’t felt right. Like…I feel like I wouldn’t even know what I was doing.”

“It’s not difficult.” Brandon laughs. “You just sort of smoosh your lips to hers, stay there for a few seconds and then pull away.”

“No way, I’ve seen enough movies to at least know you have to move your lips a little. What if she wants to open mouth kiss or something?”

“Like with tongue? It’s not that gross.”

“You tongue kiss with Molly?!”

“Sometimes.” Brandon shrugs. “It’s nice.”

“I feel like you know everything.” Andy rolls his eyes.

“Well, Andy, when you’re twelve you sort of just figure it all out.” He smirks.

“You’ve been twelve for a month, get over yourself.” Andy laughs.

“Seriously, though, kissing isn’t that scary.”

“I’ll take your word for it.”

“You know…if you ever wanna, like, know how to do it so it’s good for her, I could show you how.”

“Like…practice?”

“Sure.” Brandon shrugs. “Only if you wanted.”

“Wouldn’t it be like cheating on her, though?”

“Not really, it’s not like it would count.”

“So…you’d show me how to kiss?”

“Yeah, what else are friends for?”

Andy’s heart was racing. Deep down he sort of knew he shouldn’t be doing this behind Caroline’s back, but Brandon was offering something he really wanted on a silver platter and he wasn’t sure he wanted to pass it up.

“Okay, show me what to do.” Brandon scoots closer to him, and furrows his brows. “What?”

“Your hair is just kinda in the way, here.” Brandon reaches forward and pushes Andy’s hair back. “There.” He was blushing and so was Andy.

“Thanks.” He swallows.

“You’re sure about this?”

“Yeah, I wanna know how to do this right.”

“Okay…so…basically, you just sort of…” Brandon cups Andy’s cheeks and leans in closer. “You’re okay?”

“Yeah.”

Brandon nods.

“So, you close your eyes and pucker your lips, but not too tight.”

Andy closes his eyes.

“Like this?”

“Yeah.” Brandon smile, but Andy obviously doesn’t see it. “I’m gonna do it now.”

“Okay.”

Just as Brandon’s about to press his lips to Andy’s, there’s a knock on the door, they both scoot away immediately.

“Boys, it’s getting late.” Mrs. Stewart comes in. “Time for bed.” She smiles and closes the door.

Both boys start laughing.

“I think we should go to sleep like your mum said.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah…I mean…I guess Caroline and I will just figure it out together when it happens, but thanks anyways.” Andy rolls out his sleeping bag.

“You know you can sleep on the bed with me…”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because…one morning when I slept over I woke up, like, ugh, see I do this thing when I sleep where I hold onto something. Like, I have a body pillow at home, you’ve seen it. The same thing happens to my dad, I don’t know why. So one time when I was here I woke up holding onto you and I don’t wanna do it and make you uncomfortable.”

“It didn’t.”

“Wait, you…you knew that happened?”

“Yeah, I just didn’t say anything because I didn’t wanna make you uncomfortable.”

“It didn’t weird you out?”

“No…should it have?”

“I don’t know.”

“Girls do that and share beds all the time. Molly told me that her and Alexis do it all the time.”

“Oh.”

“Sleep on the floor if you want, but you can share my bed with me.”

“Well…I guess if you really don’t care if it happens…”

“Andy I was willing to kiss you, I don’t really care if you accidentally hold me in your sleep.”

“Okay, then, uh, I’ll sleep on the bed then, but I’m gonna use my sleeping bag still.”

“Whatever works.” He shrugs. The boys both get into bed, and lay there staring at the ceiling. “What we did, well, what we almost did…that should probably stay between us…”

“I agree.”

“Pinky promise?” Brandon raises his pinky.

“Pinky promise.” Andy locks his pinky with Brandon’s and they rest their hands together on the bed, neither of them letting go.

You and Harry enjoyed a nice, long bath together, and then went to bed. You felt unbelievably cozy in his arms. Yeah, you were definitely going to be moving in sooner rather than later. This is what you wanted every single night, and he felt the same way.

The next morning you wake up with Harry’s hard-on pressing into your ass. You know he’s awake when he starts grinding into you, and groping at your breast. You smile as he kisses on your shoulder.

“Someone’s awake.” You giggle and he hums his response.

“Very much so. Is this alright?”

“Very much so.” You say his words back at him.

“What do you say we-“ Harry’s cut off by the sound of his phone going off. He groans and grabs it. “What’s up, Andy?”

“Dad…you were supposed to pick me up, like, fifteen minutes ago.”

“Oh, shit!” Harry sits up immediately. “I’m so sorry, I’ll be there soon, just hang tight.”

“Where are you?”

“I had a sleepover of my own…I’ll be there soon, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Fuck, I’m late picking Andy up. I never set an alarm, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, baby, go get him.”

“Are you staying here today?”

“Yeah, but I’ll come over to sleep tonight. I wanna finish up the work I was doing last night.”

“Okay.” He smiles and kisses you quick before throwing some clothes on. “Text me later, I can have dinner made.”

“Sounds good.” You smile and watch him walk out.

Harry picks Andy up, and Andy gets into the car.

“I’m so sorry I was late, you know that never happens.”

“It’s okay, where’s Y/N?”

“She’s at her place, she’ll be over later though. She said she may move in during spring break instead of waiting until July.”

“Really? That’s great! Um…do you think if I called Mum…like would you care if I go to her place?”

“Not at all, I’m sure she’d love to have you home. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, I just feel like being with her, I guess.”

When they get inside, Andy goes to his room to call Paige.

“Hi, honey, how was Brandon’s?”

“Good…are you busy today?”

“Not really, why?”

“Could you come get me? I wanna stay with you tonight.”

“Yeah! Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine, I just feel like I miss you, Mum.” Andy had spent an entire week with his mother, and he really didn’t want to wait another week to see her again. “Got used to being around you and now you’re not here, so-“

“I can be over in a few hours, does that work?”

“Yeah.” Andy sighs. “That’s fine.”

“And you’re sure everything’s fine?”

“Yeah, I just wanna come hang out with you…”

“Okay, baby.”

Andy hangs up and gets up to close his door. There was one more call he needed to make before going out to the living room with his father.

“Andy?”

“Hi, Y/N.”

“Is everything alright?”

“Why does everyone keep asking me that?”

“Well…it’s a bit odd for you to call me…oh my god, is your dad okay?!”

“He’s fine, chill! I just needed to talk to you about something and I’m going to Mum’s later.”

“Oh, you are? I’m coming over for dinner…”

“I know, I just feel like being with her.”

“Alright, well, I’m glad you’ll see her then…so, what’s up?”

“Something happened last night.”

“At the movies?”

“No, after, at Brandon’s…”

“What happened?”

“We almost kissed.” Andy groans.

“What?!”

“Yeah! We were talking about kissing, and I told him I was nervous about kissing Caroline because I don’t know what I’m doing, and he…he offered to show me how.”

That sly son of a bitch. You think to yourself.

“Andy…you’re dating Caroline.”

“I know! We didn’t kiss, his mom knocked on the door and told us to go to bed. And when we went to bed we fell asleep holding hands.”

“How do you think Caroline would feel if she knew about that?”

“She’d probably feel bad.”

“Right.”

“I really like her, Y/N…but maybe I just like her as a friend, and Brandon as more than a friend. I like having Caroline around, we have a lot in common, and we have fun together.”

“Maybe now just isn’t a good time for you to be dating anyone. It’s not fair to anyone involved, you know?”

“I guess so…but I don’t wanna hurt her feelings.”

“You’ll hurt her more if you do something behind her back with Brandon.” You sigh. “Think things over at Mum’s…maybe you could even talk to her about it. She may have better advice than me, your dad could too.”

“No, they won’t understand.”

“They could if you tried talking to them.”

“But I like just talking to you about this stuff.”

“And I feel so honored that you feel comfortable with me, Andy, I really do…I just think this is starting to get heavy, and you have so many people that love you and care about you that just want to help. I’m one of those people, but so are your parents.”

“It’s just awkward to talk about…”

“I know, sweetheart. None of this is easy. Could you just try? For me?”

“Yeah…I’ll try…thanks Y/N.”

“You’re welcome.”

Andy hangs up the phone and takes a deep breath. Harry was up in his loft, and Andy goes up to join him.

“Dad?”

“Yeah?”

“Mum said she could be here in a few hours.”

“Okay.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” Harry turns around and gives Andy his full attention while Andy sits down on the loveseat, pressing a pillow to his chest.

“How do you breakup with someone?”

“Oh no, you don’t like Caroline anymore?”

“It’s not that I don’t…I just think I…Dad, Brandon and I almost kissed last night, and I don’t wanna do anything behind her back because I like her and I don’t wanna hurt her feelings.”

Harry gets up and sits down next to Andy. He puts his arm around his and rubs his shoulder. He wasn’t entirely sure what to say.

“Have you and Brandon talked at all about how you both might feel about each other?”

“Not really.”

“I know it can be awkward, but it seems like he may like you the way you like him.”

“The times Caroline and I have almost kissed I’ve felt really scared, but I didn’t feel scared with him.”

“I think you’re right to end things with her, I’d hate for your first kiss to be a dishonest one.”

“So…you don’t care that it was almost with Brandon?”

“Of course not! We’ve talked about this, Andy. No matter who you are or who you wanna be with, I’ll still love you. I just want you to be happy.”

“What does it mean when you like boys and girls?”

“Um, well, the term is called bi-sexual.”

“Is it normal? I feel like such a freak.”

“It’s very normal! A lot of people like boys and girls. You’re not a freak, Andy. You also don’t have to have it all figured out right now.”

“Everyone keeps saying that, but it doesn’t make me feel better.” He sighs and leans into Harry more.

“I know…but I promise, at some point, it will get better.” Harry smooths some hair away from Andy’s face.

“It will?”

“Yeah.” Harry smiles. “You know when I was younger, I used to be afraid to paint my nails, or wear things that were seen as girly, and then when I got to uni I just stopped caring. I grew my hair out really long, and just did what made me comfortable, and it helped me really realize who I was. Now I don’t care what people think when they look at me. I do what makes me happy and comfortable, and I want the same for you. I don’t know if you kids have easier or worse nowadays. Things are more accepted, but you also have all that social media and cyber-bullying.”

“There are plenty of other kids in the school that know who they are already. There’s even a trans kid in my class. No one cares, she’s really nice. I guess I just wish I could have it figured out like them.”

“These things take time. I know it’s not exactly the answer you wanna hear, but…”

“No, I get it.” Andy sighs. “I’m sorry I haven’t really been talking to you about all of this, it’s just so awkward to tell my dad I like boys…”

“I suppose.” Harry chuckles. “But just know I’m never gonna judge you, and neither will your mother. She’s just as understanding and accepting as I am. If she wasn’t we never would’ve gotten together.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, she needed help with her nails one night and I helped her. Next day she kissed me.”

“Wow…Mum made the first move?”

“Technically, yeah, but I used to flirt with her all the time. She knew I liked her, but she had just broken up with someone else so she was taking some time before jumping into something else. I know it seems like Mum sort of stands in the shadows, but she’s one of the strongest people I’ve ever met.”

“And what about Y/N?”

“She’s very brave and strong too. It take a lot of courage to move somewhere new and start over just to get another degree. I tell her all the time how proud I am of her.”

“Is she your person?”

“Have you been watching Grey’s with Mum again?” Harry groans.

“No! Okay, sometimes we watch it together when I’m home, but I wasn’t thinking of that when I asked the question.”

“Yeah, Y/N’s my person.” Harry nods. “I think we complement each other nicely, and she’s great with you. That’s the most important thing to me.”

“I like her a lot. Sometimes I wish I could have the relationship I have with her that I have with Noah…”

“You can, you just have to work at it. Meet him halfway a little more.”

“And you’re okay with that?”

“Andy, I’m always gonna be your father, your dad, Noah’s not going to replace me in any way, but I think it would be good to let him in a little more. He’s not going anywhere, you know?”

“Right. Maybe I could ask him to watch a movie with me this weekend.”

“I bet he’d really like that.”

Paige picks Andy up, and he’s quiet in the car at first. He was drained from all the talking, but he knew he needed to fill her in on things.

“Mum?”

“Yes, honey?”

“I don’t really wanna talk about it anymore, but I like boys and girls, and I think I like Brandon more than Caroline, so I need to break up with her, and I’m scared, but I know it’s the right things to do, so I’ll do it.”

“Oh…oh my, um, okay.”

“Do you…do you still love me?” Andy’s voice cracks just as Paige pulls into her driveway. She turns around to look at him.

“Of course I still love you! You never have to worry about that.”

Andy nods and gets out of the car. Paige hugs him immediately before going inside. Once Andy’s put his things away in his room he comes down to the kitchen and smells something delicious.

“What’s for dinner?” He asks.

“Well, since we knew you were coming we decided to get some of those spinach raviolis you like, and Rachel requested garlic bread.” Noah says.

“You did that for me?”

“Course, buddy.” Noah smiles.

“Thanks, Noah, that was really nice of you.” Andy sits down at the table next to Rachel. “Hey.”

“Hi.” She raises an eyebrow at him. “I thought you wanted to stay with your dad this weekend.”

“I did, but…I sort of missed Mum, so…”

“Must be nice to do that when you can.” She mumbles.

“I was gonna ask your dad if he wanted to watch a movie together tonight, would you wanna join?”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, sure, but why?”

“I’m trying to make more of effort. I’ve been acting like a baby.”

“I believe I said spoiled brat, but baby works too.” She smiles. “I think a movie is a great idea.”

“Hi, precious.” Lydia comes to the table and gives Andy a kiss on the top of his head.

“Hi, Gram.”

“Alright.” Paige says as she puts everything on the table. “Everybody dig in.”

“This looks really good.” Andy says. “Thank you.”

“More than welcome.” Noah says.

“Would everyone be up for watching a movie tonight?” Andy asks.

“Sure, honey, what do you feel like watching?” Paige says.

“It doesn’t matter.” He shrugs.

“How about Ratatouille?” Rachel says.

“Oh, I like that one.” Andy says.

“Ratatouille it is then.” Noah smiles.

“Andy, after dinner, there’s something I wanna talk to you about. Noah can set up the movie.”

“Okay.”

“What is Ratatouille about?” Lydia asks.

“It’s about this rat named Remy who’s really good at cooking, and then he hides under the hat of this guy who isn’t good at cooking, and he helps him cook in this fancy restaurant.” Rachel explains.

“Perhaps I’ll read something instead.” Lydia chuckles.

After dinner Paige goes into Andy’s room with him, and sits on his bed.

“So, what’s up?” He asks her.

“Well, the wedding’s going to be in July, as you know.” Andy nods. “And I’ve been fleshing out some of the details. There’s something I’d like you to do.”

“What, Mum?”

“If you felt comfortable with it, I’d like you to walk me down the aisle and give me away.”

“I…I thought you wanted me to walk Gram down the aisle.”

“I did at first, but Uncle Ned is gonna do it.”

“You really want me to do it?”

“I can’t think of anyone else I would want to give me away at my wedding, baby.” She smiles at him.

Andy’s eyes well up. This was the breakthrough he had been needing. He knows his mother loves him, but for a while he felt like she was moving on without him.

“Okay, Mummy.” He says and they throw their arms around each other. “I’d be happy to.” He snuggles into her and she holds him close, rocking him gently.

“You have no idea how happy that makes me.” She kisses his cheek. “I love you so much, Andy.”

“I love you too.” He looks up at her. “I’m really sorry Gramp won’t be there to do it, but he’ll sort of be with us, right?”

“Right, baby.” She blinks a few tears away. “Well, I think Noah said something about ice cream sandwiches, so we better get down there.”

Everyone gets comfortable on the couch to watch the movie.

Paige: I asked Andy to walk me down the aisle, and he said yes! Thanks for sharing him this weekend

Harry was knuckle deep fingering you when Paige texted him, so it took him a bit to respond.

“Oh! Andy’s gonna walk Paige down the aisle at her wedding.” Harry shows you his phone as you both get settled into bed.

“That’s great! I’m glad he went over there.”

“Me too. Let me just text her back.”

Harry: Amazing! And no worries, he really wanted to hang out with you

Paige: I can bring him back to you tomorrow so you don’t have to

Harry: you sure?

Paige: yeah, it’s no trouble :)

Harry: alright, thanks

“Okay, putting this on do not disturb.” Harry sighs.

“Are we, um, going to the wedding?”

“Slow down, we?” Your face drops and he starts laughing. You smack his shoulder and he laughs harder. “Sorry, I couldn’t help myself. We’ve been invited, but I haven’t made up my mind yet. It’s going to be a little tough for me. Maybe we’ll just go to the reception, skip the ceremony.”

“Whatever you wanna do is fine with me.” You give his hand a squeeze. “It would be cute to see Andy walk her down the aisle.”

“You know I was nervous Paige was gonna ask me to do it when she was still a little vulnerable after Nathan died. I’m really glad she didn’t.”

“I feel like that would be crossing a line.”

“Just a wee bit.” He takes your hand to kiss it. “I think she forgets where the line is sometimes, but it’s hard to correct her.”

“If she had asked you to do it, would you?”

“No.” He shakes his head. “I would have told her to ask Andy. I’m glad she thought of it on her own.” You both slide down in the bed and you rest your head on his chest while he cards his fingers through your hair. “So, you wanna get married at some point.”

“Correct.” You giggle.

“What kind of wedding do you think you’d want?”

“Something small, honestly. Just close friends and family.”

“I like the sound of that. No sense in blowing an arm and a leg on it.”

“Exactly! I’d love for it be in the fall so it’s not too hot, like, at a nice gazeebo in a park. Oh! And I could really see myself in, like, a white pair of slacks and a blouse.”

“You wouldn’t wanna wear a dress?”

“Not really.” You shrug. “I mean, I could change my mind, but I like the idea of doing something a little different. I’d do the veil and all that.”

“You’d look lovely no matter what you’d wear, baby.”

“Thanks.” You kiss his chest. “What would you want?”

“Pretty much everything you described, something simple with close friends and family. I love the idea of having it in a park. We probably wouldn’t be able to do it in the fall because of school, but maybe in the late spring when the weather feels the same? We could have a nice reception at a local hall so people could dance, or we could rent a tent or something? Lots of really good food, buffet style so people can just take what they want.”

“And we could get assorted cupcakes, I like when weddings have those.”

“Me too, it’s just enough dessert.” He looks down at you and tilts your chin up, pressing his lips to yours. “When do you want to get married, Y/N?”

“Oh, god, I don’t know, baby. Probably after I get my doctorate. As simple as things would be, it would still be a lot to plan along with my work, you know?”

“Mm, definitely. Although, you wouldn’t be planning it on your own. It would be our wedding, so we’d both plan it.”

“You’d really wanna help with all that?”

“Sure! Seems like it could be fun.” He smiles. “And then…I mean, when do you think you’d wanna start having kids? I know I’m still young, but I wanna be too old that I can’t even play with them. That was the most fun part about being young with Andy. I had all the energy in the world when we’d go to the playground and stuff.”

“I’d say by the time I’m thirty would be good, but I mean, if it happens sooner I wouldn’t be mad.”

“Even if we weren’t married yet?”

“Yeah, I mean, ideally I’d at least like to be engaged, but if I got pregnant before we got married it would be fine. Is it weird that I’m not really worried about it?”

“So if you missed your period you wouldn’t freak out?”

“I mean right now I would, I’m way too busy for a baby, but once I’m done with my work I could definitely handle it.”

“I love hearing you talk about wanting to have a baby with me.” He kisses your forehead.

“It’ll be so nice to feel you come inside me.” You bite your bottom lip as you look up at him.

“I’m sorry, did I not make you come enough times earlier? Are you still in the mood?” He smirks.

“Mmm, maybe?” You slide your leg over his and lightly grind against it. “I wouldn’t mind if we went another round…we need all the practice we can get if we’re gonna make a baby at some point.”

“I like the way you think, darling.”

During the beginning of March, you and Harry work to get the living room ready for painting. Andy was a big help, and it was fun to watch how serious he took painting. You played music and had a pretty good time getting it all done. Many hands make light work.

Noah came over to help move some of the furniture. The couch and love seat needed to be moved to the basement to make room for the new furniture you had ordered. That was a fun day too, Andy had a ball flopping down onto the different couches. You found a set that had recliners. You also went a curtain and blind store to update some other things.

Then came yours and Harry’s spring break, it was time for you to officially move. It was bittersweet saying goodbye to your apartment. It had been an excellent place to live, but Harry’s house was home now. You set up the loft to have both of your desks and you both loved that no matter what you’d be office neighbors. Andy was a huge help with moving too. He honestly needed the distraction. Things with Caroline…weren’t great.

“Andy, it’s sweet you wanted to go for a walk after school, but it’s a little chilly.” She laughed.

“Sorry, I just wanted to talk privately. Wanna go sit on the swings?”

“Sure.” She shrugged and they walked over to the school playground. “So, what’s up?”

“Caroline, I’m really glad you’re here, and I’m happy we’ve gotten so close, but I don’t think I can be your boyfriend anymore…”

“Wh-what?” Her eyes welled up and her bottom lip quivered.

“Please, don’t cry.” He reached for her hand, and she let him hold it.

“I thought we were having fun…”

“We were! I…I’m really confused about things right now, and it wouldn’t be fair to keep dating when I’m not one-hundred percent sure.”

“What are you confused about? Do you like someone else?”

“I really like you, a lot, Caroline, but there is someone else I also really like, and I liked them before you came here, and I thought that feeling went away, but it didn’t. I’m really sorry.”

“Who is it?”

“I don’t wanna say…I haven’t talked to them yet.”

“Well, this isn’t what I thought we’d be talking about at all…”

“I…don’t wanna stop hanging out with you, though. I like when we do stuff together, you’re so much fun, and-“

“So you just wanna be friends?”

“If you’re okay with that.”

“Um…I think it’s gonna take me some time to wanna be friends, Andy. I feel…really blindsided.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you, I feel terrible.” She nodded at him and stood up, so did he. “Will you think about it? Being friends?”

“Yeah…I mean, I don’t wanna lose you. You were the first person that talked to me here and made me feel welcome.”

“I don’t wanna lose you either.”

She threw her arms around him and they hugged.

“I hope things work out with the other person.” She whispered.

“Me too.”

Things were awkward at school for a bit, especially since people wanted to know why, but Caroline was coming back around slowly to Andy. Anyways, he was just thankful for the creative distractions of painting and rearranging furniture. It made him happy to see his dad so happy too. He could tell Harry was trying to contain his excitement of you moving in.

Things with Brandon were…a tad strained too. It was a little awkward after the almost kissing thing, and even though Brandon was there for Andy after breaking things off with Caroline, he still seemed to be with Molly, and Andy was more confused and annoyed than ever.

The topic of Andy’s April vacation had come up, and Harry and Paige agreed to split the week so that both of them would only have to take a few days off from work. That’s when you and Harry decide it would be good to take Andy to Boston for a little trip. You could spend a few days at Julian’s hotel for next to nothing, and Andy could meet your parents. Harry could meet your friends too, maybe not in the bar atmosphere you were hoping for, but they could meet him nonetheless.

Things were going really well. You were able to get more work done than you thought at the house, and your classes were going incredibly well. Living with Harry was a breeze. He was such a chill and easy going person. You never had a relationship where you could communicate with someone so easily. You rarely fought, and it made for a really happy and healthy environment for everyone.

You were having a peaceful Saturday morning, working away up in the loft while Harry was downstairs reading on your new couch. He loved the recliners.

“Hey, Dad.” Andy plops down next to him.

“What’s up?” Harry closes his book to give his son his full attention.

“So, um, my birthday is a month away, as you know.” Harry hums his response. “My grades have been really good again this year, don’t you think?”

“They’ve been exceptional, I’m really proud of you.”

“Thanks…so…you know how you and Mum usually get me something?” Harry nods at him. “Well, there’s really only thing I want this year.”

“Oh? And what might that be?” Harry sits his chair up straight so he can turn to face Andy.

“A smart phone.” Andy mumbles.

“Hmm, are you turning thirteen this year?”

“No…I’m turning twelve.”

“Right, that’s what I thought. So, no smart phone, Andy.”

“Dad, please?”

“We had an agreement. Your mum feels the same way, I’m sorry, my hands are tied.”

“What’s the difference between now and one more year?”

“If a year doesn’t make a difference, then you can continue to wait.”

“Ugh, you’re being so unfair!”

“Don’t raise your voice at me, I’m being perfectly reasonable. There must be something else you want?”

“No, that’s literally all I want.” Andy huffs. “All of my friends have them, why can’t I?!”

“First of all, smart phones are very expensive, your phone now only costs thirty dollars a month. I’d have to add your line to mine, and that could be over one hundred extra a month. Second of all, I don’t care what your friends have, it’s not happening.”

“You get paid like ninety grand a year!” Andy stands up. “No way money is the issue. I’ll get a paper route or something to help pay for it.”

“That’s really not a lot of money to make when you own a home and have a child. You can wait another year. What do you even need one for right now? You have your own laptop, you have all the internet you could need.”

“I wanna be able to go on Instagram like my friends can!”

“Instagram?!” Now Harry’ standing up, and you can’t concentrate on your work anymore, so you stand up and lean against the banister to see what’s going on. “Who said you’d even be allowed to download all of those apps when you get a smart phone?!”

“Are you kidding me?! That’s the whole point!”

“You won’t be allowed to have any of that until you go to high school!”

“You’re living under a rock, Dad! Everyone my age uses this stuff! I wanna be able to see what my friends are posting, I’m always left out of the loop! I can’t even group text properly!”

“Who do you need to group text with?!”

“My fucking friends!”

Harry was fuming now. You had never seen him like this. You creep down the stairs to maybe see how you could help. You had never seen them fight like this before. Usually it was playful. This was very serious.

“Give me your phone, now.”

“What, why?”

“Because I said so.” Harry holds out his hand for it, and Andy reluctantly gives it to him. “You want a phone so badly for your birthday? You can have this back next month.”

“What?!”

“You heard me.” Harry puts the phone in his pocket and crosses his arms. “You can use the landline if you need make calls.”

“What if Mum needs to text me or-“

��I’ll tell her what’s going on, and she’ll either call me or she’ll call the landline if she needs to speak with you.”

“I can’t believe you’re getting upset over a simple question! I just asked for a phone!”

“We’ve been over this a million times! You’ll get one when you’re thirteen, and that’s final.”

“And you’re really going to take my other phone away until my birthday next month.”

“That’s right.”

Andy was fuming now. He looks at you, almost pleading to say something to his father, but you bite your inner cheek and look away.

“You’re being unfair!”

“I think I’m being plenty fair! This phone isn’t even yours, it’s mine! I pay for it, don’t I?”

“Harry.” You finally step in. “That’s enough.” He turns to look at you with raised eyebrows. “Andy, you shouldn’t talk to your father like that…I don’t like hearing you use cuss words. Also, the rules have been pretty clear, you need to wait another year for a smart phone. Try to think of something else you may like for your birthday, yeah?”

“But-“

“I think you should go cool off in your room for a bit.” You nod in that direction.

“You can’t tell me to go to my room, Y/N.” He scoffs.

“Actually, she can, so go.” Harry says.

“Everyone’s against me! Jesus Christ.” He grumbles and storms off to his room, slamming the door shut.

“I wish you had stayed upstairs, I was handling it.” Harry says to you.

“Were you? Because it seemed like you were throwing daggers at him. You can’t say that to a kid.”

“What?”

“That his property isn’t really his because you pay for it. That’s like saying his room isn’t really his because this is your house. My dad used to say shit like that when he’d get really mad at Phil and I. It doesn’t exactly make for a safe environment when you don’t think anything is yours.” You bite your bottom lip. “Did you really need to take his phone away?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because he was acting like a spoiled brat, and I can’t stand it when he does that. Maybe that’s on Paige and I for rarely saying no, but I’m saying no now and he needs to respect that.”

“And you’re really not going to give it back to him until his birthday?”

“That’s right. It won’t kill him to be a little unplugged. If I need to get in touch with him at school I’ll just call the office, and he knows he can do the same. The secretary has a community phone for the kids to use.”

“You didn’t flip out until he mentioned Instagram, why?”

“Because he’s too young for all that. If he gets one then I’ll need to get one.”

“Why?”

“Because I’ll need to monitor what he’s posting.”

“Oh my god.” You shake your head. “You know what that leads to? Him just making a finsta that’s private and all his friends will follow him on there, and he’ll post whatever he wants and have the real fun, and then he’ll post what he thinks won’t get him in trouble on whatever account you follow him on. Come on, Harry, only helicopter parents do shit like that.”

“What in the fuck is a finsta…?”

“It’s a fake Instagram. Look, instead of doing that, we could just talk to him about the importance of privacy settings, and what’s appropriate to post. Instagram can be a lot of fun for kids, you can post aesthetically pleasing photos, although it’s not as fun as it used to be. I remember when I got mine, like, god almost ten years ago, people just used to post cool pictures of food, now it’s a place for influencers and models, which is really annoying, but-“

“Y/N, please, you’re giving me a headache.” Harry sighs. “I’m his dad, so what I say goes.”

“Right, and I’m just the woman who lives here that fucks you, is that it?”

“Don’t twist this into an argument between the two of us, it’s not necessary.”

“You picked a fight with him for no fucking reason, Harry.”

“He started getting-“

“I don’t care! You’re the parent, like you said, act like the adult you are. You could have handled that ten times better, but instead you chose to be petty, and for what? I know it’s scary that he’s growing up, and maybe right now you can protect him by not getting him the phone, but you can’t protect him from every little thing. What you should do is teach him how to properly use all of that stuff so he doesn’t get hurt. Don’t talk to strangers applies in the real world as it does virtually, stuff like that.”

“Wow, been living here a month and you’re an expert on parenting, that’s incredible. You should really write a book on it.”

You narrow your eyes at him. Harry had never, not once, spoke to you like that. Something had really crawled up his ass today, and you clearly hit a trigger for him. This had to be about Andy growing up, and Harry being sad about it. You look him up and down and smirk before going back upstairs to your work. If he didn’t want you to be involved, then you wouldn’t be involved.

After a couple of hours, Harry knocks on Andy’s door.

“Come in…” He mutters as Harry enters.

“Hey.”

“Can we chat?”

“Are you gonna yell at me again?”

“Are you gonna yell at me?”

“No.” He mumbles, and Harry nods. He sits down with Andy on his bed.

“I know I was harsh earlier, and I know it seems unfair that I’m being so firm about this, but I’d appreciate a little trust here. You do not need a smart phone yet, trust me. All of those apps and stuff just rot your brain. Right now you read before you go to bed, and you’re able to relax. Smart phones are really tempting and can keep you up for hours if you’re not careful. I just think you could handle it better a little later on.”

“My friends are able to take pictures and post them, and then someone always has to show them to me. It’s embarrassing.”

“I’m sure you’re not the only one in your grade that doesn’t have one.”

“You’re probably right, but it’s still annoying.”

“I know.” Harry sighs. “Here.” Harry gives Andy back his little phone. It was the kind that slides open to have a keyboard to text. “You have no reason to really be punished, you didn’t do anything that would warrant not having your phone.”

“Thanks.” Andy sets it down on his bed.

“Social media can be really scary, and I know you think it’s fun, but it can turn to not so fun fast, and my biggest fear is that something could happen to you because of it.”

“Dad, I’m not gonna talk to anyone I don’t know…”

“Well, I should hope not.”

“Is Y/N mad at me? I shouldn’t have said that to her…”

“No, she’s mad at me actually for how I handled things. I’m sorry I said that too about the phone being mine. It’s not, it’s yours…and I don’t mind footing the bill.”

“It’s okay…is she still working, can I go see her?”

“I’m sure she wouldn’t mind the visit from you.” Harry smiles. “Can we agree that you’ll get the phone next May? Please, I don’t want to keep having this same fight.”

“Okay.” Andy nods. “But there’s something else I want then.”

“Name it.”

“Ariana Grande is touring again soon, and I’d like to go to her concert.”

“Do you wanna bring a friend?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.” Harry sighs. “I’ll see what I can do, alright?”

“Really?!”

“Yeah.”

“Oh my god!” Andy squeals and lunges himself onto Harry for a hug. Harry chuckles and hugs his son back. “And don’t worry about having to chaperone, Y/N told me if Ari ever toured here again she’d take me.”

“Thank god, I really don’t think I could sit through it.”

Andy rolls his eyes to get up and go see you.

“Y/N?”

“Hey.” You smile at him.

“I’m sorry about earlier.”

“Oh, please.” You scoff. “It’s fine, I would have said the same thing. Did you and Dad figure things out?”

“Mhm.” Andy grins. “He’s gonna try to get tickets to see Ariana Grande for us!”

“That’s great! Better than a phone, huh?”

“Way better.” He comes over to you to hug you, and then he heads back downstairs. The Styles men, you were starting to notice, are a special breed.

You don’t’ say much to Harry for the rest of the day, although you could tell he trying to butter you up. He made lasagna for dinner, one of your favorites. You mostly spoke with Andy at the table. You wanted a formal apology for what he said to you, that was it. When you had still barely spoken to him by the time you both got into bed, he sighs heavily and looks at you. You raise an eyebrow at him.

“What do you want to hear, that you were right?”

“No, I want to hear you say you’re sorry for being a facetious little shit when I was just trying to help. I’m fully aware that I don’t have as much experience parenting as you do, but don’t discount me like that. I’ve been in that kid’s life long enough now, also I’ve read a few parenting books since we started dating so-“

“You have?”

“Of course I have! I went into this blind, I had to do some research, Harry.”

“I’m sorry I said what I said to you, I was frustrated that you…that you just read the situation to a T. I’m petrified of him growing up, it sucks. I hate it and there’s nothing I can do to stop it, and I have control of the phone thing, so I flipped out when he challenged me on it.”

“I didn’t like hearing you yell. You never get that mad.”

“I have my moments, you’re just more privy to them now.” He sighs. “It’s hard for to stay calm sometimes when he starts yelling at me. It’s only going to get worse, so I know it need work on keeping my cool.” You nod your head. “I gave him his phone back.”

“You did?” You features soften.

“Yeah, it was stupid of me to have taken it in the first place. He didn’t really do anything wrong.”

“I’ll always respect your decisions, I mean, you’ve been doing this alone, sort of. But I want you to remember I’m your partner in this, we’re a team, babe.”

“Yeah, we are.” He smiles. “I really am sorry for speaking to you like that.”

“It’s okay.” You shrug. “You backed me up while he was still in the room.”

“I’m glad you butted in, who knows what else I would have said if you hadn’t. I feel like for so long, like, because he wanted to be with me, and I got used to it, I didn’t really discipline him as much. I wanted to keep him happy so he’d want to stay. It was so hard for years only seeing him for small chunks of time. I’ve been trying to form better habits.”

“And you’re doing a great job, I think you’re doing as best as you can. I just want you to know it’s not all on your shoulders anymore.”

“Thanks, baby.” He kisses your cheek. “So…we’re good?”

“Yeah, we’re good.”

“Good, I couldn’t stand the silent treatment.”

“I just didn’t really know what to say to you, honestly. Upside is I got a fuck ton of work done.” You chuckle.

“Oh, well, thank god for that.” He laughs. “So, you’re not gonna deprive me of the booty tonight, then?”

“No, you can still have some booty.” You giggle and shift down in the bed, and turn over so he can wrap himself around you. The sound of his sigh makes me you smile. “I feel like even if I was so mad at you that I didn’t want you to hold me, you would in your sleep anyways.”

“My plan is to never make you that mad, so we don’t have to worry about that.”

“Oh good, I’m glad you have a plan.”

“Goodnight, Y/N.” He kisses your cheek again before really getting cozy with you.

“Goodnight, Harry.”

Since you were going for a few days, you decide to drive down to Boston. You were a little worried that it might be awkward sharing a room with both Harry and Andy, but neither of them seemed all that concerned. Julian said he’d hook you up with a good size room, so that put you at ease.

“What are we doing first, Y/N?” Andy asks excitedly from the back seat.

“Well, first we’re going to check in to the hotel to drop all of our things off, and then I was thinking we could go to the aquarium, would you like that?”

“Yeah! I haven’t been there in forever. Can we do the touch tank?”

“Of course.”

Harry puts his hand on your thigh as you drive. He was over the moon about doing something just the three of you. Even though you all lived together now, a trip would be a good bonding experience.

“Holy shit.” You say to yourself when you go inside the room. “He gave us a full suite! Look, there’s two bedrooms.”

“Sick!” Andy says as he runs in, and claims one of the rooms.

“Well, this is a pleasant surprise.” Harry says. “We’ll have to make sure to say thank you.”

“Definitely.” You text Julian immediately to tell him how amazing he is. “Okay, bathroom break and then we’ll head to the train?”

Andy didn’t get to go on the train very often, so hopping on and off was really exciting. He got to use the tube in London, but this was still fun for him. His eyes light up when you get the aquarium. He waits for you and Harry to get your tickets before going up to the touch tank that was on the outside of the building.

“They brought us here for a class trip when I was in the fourth grade, I think this and the penguins were my favorite part.” He tells you as he gently touches the various animals in the tanks. “It’s so cool.”

Once Andy’s had his fill, you all head inside. He nearly squeals when he sees the penguins, and Harry takes his phone out to take some pictures, chuckling to himself.

“What?” You smile at him.

“Nothing, he’s just gonna sleep so well tonight.” He kisses your cheek. “I’m really glad we’re doing this.”

“Me too. I thought this trip could be sort of educational for him, so I got us tickets for the museum of science tomorrow.”

“I thought your friends were meeting us tomorrow?”

“They are.” You grin. “It’s going to be fantastic.”

You and Harry hold hands as you walk through the aquarium with an enthralled Andy. You stop off for a quick snack in the small food court, and keep going.

“What are we doing for dinner tonight?” Andy asks.

“Bud, you just had a bag of chips and a candy bar…” Harry says. “Why didn’t you tell me you were hungry for more?”

“I’m not, it just got me thinking about food later.”

“Happens to the best of us.” You chuckle. “We’re going to have dinner at my brother’s place so you can meet my family, how does that sound?”

“Wow, really?” Andy asks with wide eyes.

“Mhm, and brother is a really good cook, so you’re gonna eat well tonight.”

“Are your parents gonna be there too?” He asks.

“Yup.” You smile and so does he.

After the aquarium, you all go back to the hotel to freshen up before hopping in the car to go to Phil and Julian’s. You were happy it was a Sunday evening so Phil didn’t have to physically be at the restaurant. Andy gets a little shy as you walk into the complex, sticking to Harry’s side.

“Hello?” You say as you key in.

“Hey!” Julian says as he greets you. “Come on in, hi, Harry.” He smiles. “And oh my goodness, you must be Andy! Hi, I’m Julian.”

“Hello.” Andy says, politely shaking Julian’s hand.

“Phil’s made so much food, you’d think it was Thanksgiving all over again. A little birdy told us you like pasta, Andy.”

Andy’s smile grows as you all come into the kitchen. Phil had made homemade raviolis and bolognaise, along with a meatless option for you and Harry.

“Hey, everyone.” Phil smiles as he strains the raviolis. “Mum and Dad should be here any minute, think they got stuck in traffic.” He looks at Andy. “Hi, I’m Phil, it’s nice to meet you.”

“Hello.” Andy shakes his hand as well. “So…you’re Y/N’s big brother.”

“That’s right.” He throws an arm around you. “She drove me nuts growing up, but now I don’t know what I would do without her.” He kisses your temple and lets you go. “You’re on April vacation, right?”

“Mhm.”

“Must be nice to just have an entire week off, enjoy it while you can.” Phil chuckles.

“Babe, do you want me to get the table set?” Julian asks.

“Please, that would be great. Garlic bread’s almost done and then we can put it in that nice basket you got.”

Julian nods and gets to work. A knock on the door signals that your parents have arrived, and you go to open it for them. It’s hugs and kisses all around, and then they say hello to Harry.

“Good to see you both again.” Harry says to them.

“Same to you.” Your dad says.

“Andy, c’mere, I want you to meet my parents.” You say to him and he stands in front of you. “Mum, Dad, this is Harry’s son, Andy.”

“Well are you’re you just the most precious thing!” Your mom says. “Y/N’s sent us some pictures of you, but they don’t do you justice. Look at those curls!”

“Oh, thanks…I use a special mousse for them.” Andy says shyly. It makes both of your parents laugh.

“Andy, we heard you enjoy painting.” Your dad says to him and Andy nods. “Well, we couldn’t help ourselves, especially since we also heard your birthday was coming up soon.” He takes a bag from behind his back and hands it to Andy. “Go ahead and open it if you like.”

Andy looks up at you and you nod. He opens the bag and gasps.

“Whoa! It’s that washable paint stuff! Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome.” Your mom says. “We saw it and just had to get it.”

“Okay, dinner’s ready, let’s sit.” Phil says.

Everyone sits down at the table, and the conversation stays around Andy. He answers questions about school, friends, what his favorite subject is, what he does for fun (other than painting), and he talks about how much he likes living with Harry.

“Sometimes I miss my mum, but I like living with Dad more. It’s just calmer.” Andy shrugs. He was thoroughly enjoying the food as well.

“Can’t be much calmer with Y/N there now.” Your dad chuckles. “With the way she’s always running around like a chicken with their head cut off.”

“I do not do that…” You mumble.

“Sure you do honey, you always used to run around the house never able to find anything, and we’d tell you not to run because you always had socks on too, and one time you completely wiped out!”

“Wow, I didn’t realize we’d be telling embarrassing stories about me tonight.” You roll your eyes.

Andy thought it was interesting seeing you interact with your parents. You sort of did what Harry did, in that you acted like a kid again. He also liked observing Phil and Julian. Maybe things would get better.

The next day, after enjoying a nice breakfast at the hotel, you all head to the Museum of Science. Claudia, Nora, Darcy, and Mark would all be meeting you there. The three of you wait inside for them.

“Y/N!” Nora squeals and runs over to you. You open your arms and you hug each other. Everyone else comes following from behind.

“I swear she turns into a cheetah when she sees you.” Claudia says.

“Oh, shut up.” Nora says, letting go of you. She looks at Harry grins. “Well, well, well, look who have here.”

“It’s so nice to meet you all.” Harry says.

“Oo, boy, that accent.” Mark giggles to Darcy.

“This is my son, Andy. We’re both excited to spend the day with you.”

“Hello.” Andy says. He was feeling a little shy, but less so than last night.

“He’s so handsome!” Nora says to Harry. “Not surprised though.” She looks Harry up and down.

“Okay, enough flirting with my boyfriend.” You say. “Harry, Andy, this is Nora, Darcy, Claudia, and Mark, my best friends in the world.”

Everyone gets properly introduced, and you all head inside to the main area. Nora and Mark loop arms with Harry, and it makes you giggle as they walk with him, and talk his ears off. Claudia and Darcy do the same with Andy, and he loves it. Everyone helped make all of the science and exhibits extra fun for Andy. His favorite part was the lightning show.

You all were pooped by the time you got to the planetarium. Andy sits in the middle of you and Harry, and Nora sits on your other side. You two giggle and she makes you laugh so hard you cry while trying to be quiet during the show, which makes your other friends laugh too. Harry enjoys all of it.

“Okay, we were thinking Mexican for dinner, does that work for everyone?” Mark says.

“I love tacos.” Andy says. “Sounds good to me.”

“Yeah, we eat Mexican all the time.” Harry says.

“Great! You’ll love this place. They have the best margaritas.” Claudia says.

Andy was eating good this weekend. He wondered if you did this a lot when you used to live here. All of the adults order drinks, and Harry lets Andy get a virgin pina colada for his drink. Everyone got all different types of food. Luckily the restaurant had a kids menu with more traditional Tex-Mex that he was used to.

“So, Harry, talk to us about this cabin. Is it used in the summer?” Darcy asks.

“Yeah, it’s great for all seasons.” The friends all look at each other. “You all will have to come up some time this summer.”

“Oh, well, we wouldn’t want to impose.” Nora scoffs. “But I have to say, we’re incredible house guests.”

“Good to know.” Harry smiles. “So, what do you all do for work?”

“I’m a preschool teacher.” Claudia says.

“I’m an executive assistant to this CEO downtown.” Mark says. “At a marketing firm.”

“I’m an insurance agent.” Darcy says.

“And I also work in higher ed, but I work in Alumni Relations.” Nora says.

“Did you all go to school together?” Andy asks.

“Nora and I became friends in high school, and went to the same undergrad, that’s where we met Darcy and Mark, and then Claudia and I met in grad school, and she and Darcy, um, saw each other for bit…”

“But we realized friendship was the way to go.” Claudia says.

“That’s right.” Darcy says. “And we’ve all just been a little group ever since.”

“That’s kind of how my friend group is. My best friend is Brandon, and we have this other friend Tyler. And then Caroline became friends with us because she and I were boyfriend and girlfriend, but now we’re just friends.” Andy explains. “It was awkward at first, but everything’s normal again.”

“It can definitely be awkward.” Mark agrees. “You’re in sixth grade, right?”

“Mhm.”

“My god, the drama.” Claudia snickers to Darcy.

The group asks Harry questions about how he got into academia and how he ended up in New England. It was a great conversation all around. The food was excellent and everyone seemed to be meshing well. You and Nora had got up to go to the bathroom together, it was a chance to consult.

“Well?” You say to her as you both wash your hands.

“I can’t find a single flaw, Y/N.” She says. “I mean, on the outside, ten out of ten, that man is gorgeous, but he can also carry a conversation. He’s not one of those condescending know-it-alls, you can tell he’s really listening. God, and that Andy…so adorable.”

“Right? Sweetest kid ever.”

“You can tell how comfortable he is with you too by how comfortable he already is with us. He was shy at first, but he opened up. Living together has been going well so far?”

“Yeah, for the most part it was seamless. I’ve never felt this sure in a relationship before.”

“Clearly! I don’t think you’ve ever lasted this long in one.” She jokes and you roll your eyes. “I like them both a lot, well done.”

“Thanks.” You smile and walk back to the table with her.

“Well, this has been fun, but every night as to come to an end at some point.” Darcy says.

“Yeah, not all of us have a week off.” Mark says.

“Hey, I’m using vacation time same as you.” You say. “But I appreciate you all coming out today.”

“It was so nice to finally meet all of you.” Harry says.

“You both better come back down soon. We can show you a really good time nightlife wise.” Nora says.

Harry nods, and Andy says goodbye to everyone before you all go to your separate trains. Andy can barely keep his eyes open as he sits on the train between you and Harry. His head falls to Harry’s shoulder, and Harry pouts down at him.

“M’gonna have to carry him.” He says to you. “What a treat.” He puts his arm around Andy to keep him comfortable.

“I didn’t realize just how much walking we did today.” You chuckle and run your fingers through Andy’s hair.

“Think that big meal we just had did him in. It’s alright, he’s having a great time.”

“Are you going to be able to carry him?”

“Oh, sure. He’s not that heavy.”

“I know…he’s just getting lanky.”

“He’s due for a growth spurt, that’s for sure.”

Once you reach your stop, Harry’s able to pick Andy up bridal style and carry him out cuddled to his chest. It was one of the sweetest things you had ever seen. You weren’t always pricy to the more tender moments between them, and you were living for this one.

“I’m just gonna get him settled into his bed.” Harry whispers to you once you’re in the hotel room. You nod and go start your nightly routine.

Harry’s able to get Andy changed, and tucked into bed. Just as Harry kisses his forehead, Andy fidgets.

“Dad?” He mumbles.

“Shh, go back to sleep, buddy.” Harry coos.

“M’having a lot of fun with you and Mum.” He yawns and rolls over. “Goodnight.” He mumbles again before passing out.

Harry’s eyes widen and his mouth falls open. Did Andy mean to say that? Why were people always making confessions to him while they were half asleep? He slowly leaves the room and heads into yours. You were just sliding into bed.

“He all set?”

“Yeah, I’m just gonna go do my thing.” He points to the bathroom and you nod. You had gotten your period yesterday, and you were sort of thankful so that there would be minimal funny business. It wasn’t necessary on a family trip.

“Are you alright?” You ask as Harry gets into bed.

“Yeah…he just…he mumbled something in his sleep, that’s all.”

“What did he say?”

“He said he was having a lot of fun with us, um, just made me happy to hear.”

“Aw, he’s so sweet.” You peck Harry’s lips and settle down into bed. “Love you, baby.” You yawn.

“Love you too.” He says as he spoons you.

On your last day in the city, you and Harry decide it would be fun to bring Andy to the Quincy Market Place so he could do a little shopping. He nearly sprinted when he saw the Newbury Comics. You spent quite a bit of time in there, and Harry let Andy pick out a couple of things he wanted.

“Do you guys mind if I go into The Loft?”

“I thought you didn’t really shop for clothes.” Harry says to you.

“I don’t, but they’re having a sale, and I’d like to go check it out.”

“We can go with you, Y/N.” Andy says.

“So, I’m really annoying to shop with.” You laugh. “Go on to another store. I can meet you in, like, fifteen minutes?”

“Sure, let’s meet outside The Loft.” Harry says and you nod.

You really did hate to shop for clothes, especially with other people around. You were extremely picky and indecisive.

“Alright, where should we go? Need a bathroom break?” Harry asks Andy.

“No, I think we should go into one of these jewelry stores.”

“Why?”

“So you can look at rings, duh.” Andy scoffs.

“Oh, Andy…I…”

“Rip the band aid, Dad, come on, let’s just go look.” He tugs on Harry’s arms towards a jewelry store and they start looking around. “She only has, like, two rings she always wears, so this one definitely needs to be good.”

“Are you telling me you want me to propose to her already?”

“She’s living with us, why not?”

“It’s a big deal to marry someone.”

“But you both want to, right?”

“Well, yeah, we talk about it enough.”

“Okay, then. No harm in looking.” Andy shrugs. “She likes wearing silver…”

“I know.” Harry nudges him. “I have no idea what style she even would want…”

“She wears that necklace you got her every day, I don’t think she’ll care that much.”

“True, I got lucky with that one.”

Harry’s eyes scan over the various rings as the women behind the counter watch him. Nothing was really catching his eye until he saw a silver band with small diamonds studded in it, and large square diamond in the middle.

“Hey, what about this?” Harry asks Andy. “It’s…elegant, like her.” Andy tugs Harry’s shirt down so he can whisper in his ear.

“Take a sneaky picture of it so you can just order a similar one online.” Harry nods and does so swiftly before leaving the store. They both walk over to The Loft where you were standing already.

“No luck?” Harry asks when he doesn’t see any bags.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” You shake your head. “Trying clothes on while bloated was not a good idea, let’s just leave it at that.”

After a bit more walking, and a quick lunch, you all decide it’s time to hit the road. Just like last time, you drive through the city, and pull over at the rest area to let Harry drive the rest of the way. Andy was conked out in the back seat. You hold Harry’s hand as both of your arms rest on the console.

“This was a great few days.” Harry says.

“I know, I almost wish we just took the whole week off from work.” Harry chuckles at that and nods his head. “Is Paige coming to get him tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I’m gonna let him sleep in, and then she’ll come grab him while we’re at school.”

“Alright, sounds good. My family loved meeting him by the way, so did my friends. I got a ton of text messages saying so.”

“Ah, so you have all the official approval you could need then?”

“I’d say so.” You nod. “I think my parents are still a little uneasy about it, but they’ll get used to it.”

“It was really nice of them to get him that paint.”

“They’ve been dying to become grand-parents, so I’m not surprised that they jumped on the schmooze train.”

“Still, they didn’t have to do that.” He squeezes your hand. “It’s not easy to just treat someone as your own right away.”

“He doesn’t make it difficult, trust me.” You bring Harry’s hand up to your lip to press a kiss to his knuckles and he sighs.

With Andy at Paige’s for a few days that guaranteed no one just walking in, as soon as your period was over, it was like Harry went feral. It reminded you of that first weekend you actually slept over where he just wouldn’t let you leave the bedroom. He tried to be subtle about it, but he wasn’t very good at it.

“Feel like taking a break?” He says to you one night as you’re working.

“Do to what?” You say to him without looking.

“Me.” Your hands freeze over your keyboard, and you slowly turn to look at him. “You looked so pretty today, and I barely had time to tell you with all my advisees coming in and out.” He tils your chin up so you can look at him easier. “What do you say?”

You look at your computer quickly to save whatever you’re working and then you reach for the button on his jeans, but he backs away.

“Let’s get comfortable, darling.”

“You know, a break implies that this will be quick.”

“I meant break as in you’re done for the night, was I not clear?”

“Harry…”

“You’re going to burn out if you keep coming home and working until an ungodly hour.”

“I can’t help it.” You pout up at him.

“Come on, come down to the bedroom with me. We don’t have to worry about being quiet tonight…”

“Alright.” You sigh and get up to go downstairs with him.

Once you’re in the bedroom he cups your jaw and starts kissing you. It’s slow at first; soft. Your hands splay on his chest as he licks into your mouth. Before you can meet his tongue with yours he pulls away and nuzzles his nose to yours.

“Baby.” He whispers with a smile, and that all about melts you into a puddle.

He kisses from your cheek to your jaw to your neck, feather light, causing goosebumps to grow on your covered skin. You tug at the hem of his shirt, and he steps back so he can take it off. He reaches for yours and you lift your arms up. He cups your bare breasts (who wears a bra at home?), and kneads them as his lips find yours again. He gets you on the bed, and kisses down your chest. He tugs at your leggings and wriggles them down your legs along with your panties.

“Yours too.” You toe at his jeans and he smirks at you. He does as you say and gets rid of his jeans, leaving him in his boxers.

“Happy?”

“Yes.”

He goes back to kissing on your body, nipping where he feels like before sucking a bruise into your inner thigh. You grit your teeth and try not to buck your hips towards him. You gasp when you feel his tongue on you, sucking and swirling around your folds before he makes his way to your clit. He moans into you and your hands grasp at his hair. You bite your bottom lip as two fingers slide inside you, and you grind against them.

“Feels so good, don’t stop.” You say to him as he sucks on your clit and curls his fingers inside you. Your legs were starting to shake around him. “H-Harry.” You groan as your head rolls back. He keeps his pace steady, not changing a thing so you can get there. “Oh, fuck!” Your chest heaves as you release around his fingers.

He sucks his fingers into his mouth and looks at you with a smirk.

“What?” You breathe.

“Can I put the handcuffs on your for a change?”

Your eyes widen as you look at him. You really didn’t like being the one restrained, and it just looked better on Harry the times he’d let you cuff him.

“Um…maybe use one of the scarves, I don’t like the handcuffs on me.”

“But you’re okay with the scarf, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

He nods and goes into the drawer to get it.

“I’m not even gonna tie to you to bed, I’m just gonna put your wrists together.”

“Alright.”

“Sit up for me so I can tie them behind your back.”

“Oh?” Your eyebrows raise as you do as he says. He ties your wrists together and sits on the edge of the bed. “What do you want me to do, ride you?”

“Please.” He puts his arms out for you to help you. “Can I just come on your stomach?”

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

He helps get you lined up, and you sink down on him. You use your knees on either side of his thighs to help you move up and down. You could feel yourself trying to reach for him, but you couldn’t. He sits back with the palms of his hands flat behind him on the bed as you bounce up and down on him. He watches how the features on your face change as you basically use him.

“Harry, please put your hands on me.” You groan.

“Only because you asked so nicely.” He reaches for you but stops when you speak.

“Don’t be cute with me.” You smirk at him. “Or next time I’ll just have to tie you to each bed post again and ride you like this. Remember how much fun that was for you?” Your lean forward and ghost your lips over his, making him shudder.

“Okay, sorry, I’ll touch you.” He pouts slightly. His hands slide down to your ass and he helps you move on him.

You slot your mouth over his and lick into him. He moves you so you’re grinding back and forth on him and you moan into his mouth.

“Like that, baby?” He says to you as he sponges kisses to your collar bone.

“Yes, fuck, keep going.”

He looks up at you as you squeeze your eyes shut and bite your bottom lip. Your head rolls back, and you squeeze around him.

“That’s it, baby, be a good girl and come for me.”

Your mouth falls open, and you cry out as you reach your high. Those were the magic words, and they worked every single time. Harry pecks your lips before lifting you off of him and settling you on your back. He has you place your arms comfortably above your head, your wrists still tied together. He throws both of your legs over his shoulders, and thrusts back into you. He looks down to make sure you’re alright, and you nod at him to let him know he can keep going. Both of your moans and groans fill the room, along with the sound of his skin slapping against yours. Your clit was throbbing, and you need to give it some friction, but you knew Harry wanted your hands to stay put.

“H-Harry, please, could you, ah!” His tip your g-spot. “Fuck, please, rub my clit.” You groan.

He drops one of your legs so he can do so properly, and you moan out with relief. He thrusts were fast and deep, and it was going to send you over the edge any second with him rubbing you as well. Your eyes roll into back of your head when your orgasm reaches.

“Harry.” You whimper as you come down from your high.

He lets your other leg drop, and he comes down to you, chest to chest. He sucks on your bottom lip as he rocks in and out of you, and you wrap your legs around his waist. His hands come to yours, and he pushes down on your wrists as he continues to fuck you. You were breathing heavily underneath him, and you couldn’t help but look up at him and just watch. He looks down at you too, and it’s insanely intense, but neither of you can think to look anywhere else.

Harry keeps one hand on your wrists as the other snakes between the two of you. He rubs circles into your clit, and moves his hips in the same motion. Your mouth falls open and the whiniest moan comes out. He smirks at you.

“Harry, fuck, I’m gonna come again.” You groan.

“Yeah? Just feels that good, huh?”

“So good, baby, so good.” You start panting. “You treat me so well, Harry. I love you so much.”

“Fuck, I love you too.” He kisses you sloppily, teeth clanking and everything.

You moan into each other’s mouths as you come to your fourth release. You squeeze him a little too tightly, and he nearly loses control.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit.” He says as he pulls out, coming immediately onto your stomach. You were in such a daze you almost told him he could just come inside you, but that was the orgasm talking. “Fuck, baby.” He breathes and kisses your forehead. “Let me go get a rag.” Harry comes back with a warm washcloth to clean you up. “Feel like watching a movie, darling?”

“Sure.” You giggle as he cleans between your legs. “I can do that you know?”

“I know, I just feel like it’s the gentlemanly thing to do. I made a mess, I should clean it up.”

“Remind me to thank your mother some time for raising your right.”

Harry chuckles at that and tosses you one of his shirts before putting on a pair of boxers. He opens up his armoire and grabs the remote for the TV, and gets into bed while you go properly clean yourself up.

“What do you feel like watching?” He asks as you get back into bed.

“Something funny. Hmm, how about Step Brothers?” He scrunches his face at you. “Come on! It’s funny.”

“It’s mind numbingly stupid…”

“That’s the point.” You rolls your eyes at him. “I’m not watching another documentary, Harry, I’m just not.”

“But you learn so much from them, and they’re fascinating.”

“Maybe to you, I find them to be boring as all hell.”

“You can’t tell me the documentary we watched about prohibition was boring!”

“The only interesting part was when they got into the speak-easies.”

“You said you enjoyed the whole thing, you even laughed at certain parts.”

“Faked it.” You smirk and he gasps.

“You didn’t.”

“I did. Faked the whole thing.”

“Why would do that?”

“To keep you happy of course.” Your grin grows as he glares at you.

“Better be the only thing you’ve faked.” He says as he puts Netflix on to watch Step Brothers.

“Harry, you’re nuts if you think I would fake an orgasm with you. I’m not in the business of doing that anymore.”

“Anymore?” He raises an eyebrow at you.

“Did it a lot when I was younger, it’s the fastest way to get someone else to finish when you’re not super into it. I used to not be as vocal as I am now. Sometimes it takes a girl a while to feel comfortable enough to find her voice in the bedroom.”

“Fair enough.” He says as he puts his arm around you, pressing his lips to your hair line for a few kisses. “I love how vocal you are.”

“I know you do because you like hearing how good of a job you’re doing.” You look up at him and start laughing.

“What?”

“Do you get a stiffy when you read your good course evaluations?”

“No, I do not!” He starts laughing. “Why would you even ask me that?”

“Because it just seems like something that would happen to you. All of that praise must go right to that big head of yours.”

“Do you wanna watch this fucking movie or not?”

You burst out laughing as he holds you closer to him, pressing play on the movie. You kiss his cheek and settle down.

“And by the way”, he starts, “I enjoy American documentaries because there’s a lot I didn’t learn in school growing up, and it helps me know what some of the students are talking about. I get a few history majors now and then and I can happily say I can carry on a conversation with them.”

“Harry, it’s okay to be a nerd all on your own, you don’t to blame it on your students.” You give his chest a little pat, and gives your hip a pinch. “Aw, I’m just teasing, sweetheart.”

“Teasing is my thing, get your own.”

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