#and men's disgusting comments online...

[farminglesbian]

.

[bunnis-monsters]

🕸️Legend of the Drider🕸️

Bunni’s Monstertober Event(Oct1)

Male!Drider x Fem!Reader

Oct2

warnings: light web bondage, breeding, oviposition, possessive behavior, reader is a bit insecure about her body, body worship and praise

summary: You go on a trip, hoping to build your confidence before you go back to college. When you get trapped on a mountain during a storm, you realize a legend about spider people may be real when you encounter a horny one for yourself.

A/N: I don’t know much about college so don’t kill me if things are inaccurate 💗 also don’t expect all of the halloween posts to be this long, some will be short and some on the longer side >< also guess the inspo for this story in the comments…

my ko-fi if you’re feeling generous~

If you had known how your trip up a nearby mountain would end with you in the clutches of the spider creature you’d only heard of in legends, you would have stayed home that October day.

But you were bored, wanting to find some fun stuff to film and meet a cute stranger while you were at it. That’s why you packed your bag and left for the nearby tourist attractions.

First you walked through a big pumpkin patch, taking pictures with a 50 pound pumpkin. It wasn’t as impressive as some you had seen online, and you knew that wearing a burnt orange sweater while posing next to it would only bring on ridicule.

You weren’t thin, and if someone from your college saw that picture, you were sure they’d compare you to the pumpkin, saying it was your twin.

Well… you had never even really talked to a single in any of your classes. You weren’t the type that liked to socialize. Too many times had you been burned, finding out they were being your friends for a prank or had been talking about your body behind closed doors.

Part of you knew it wasn’t right to judge others before even meeting them. After all, it happened to you more times than you could count… but you were still too shy and insecure to take that first step into making new friends.

That’s why you took a bit of time off of college to try and build up your confidence. It was important to you, learning how to love yourself so you could truly love others.

Ever since you went through puberty you had been aching for someone to love you, to adore you with their entire being…

How would you even be able to believe them if you didn’t love yourself first?

So you laughed at the picture of you next to a pumpkin and placed it into your scrap book before packing it away in your backpack.

You repeated this at several tourist attractions, even finding the courage to speak to a few attractive men and women. It wasn’t as scary as you thought, they didn’t look at you with disgust or say anything mean. They simply spoke with you before giving a smile and going about their day.

‘Maybe there really isn’t anything to be afraid of after all?’

The last stop on your list was the Arachne Mountains, named after a certain legend surrounding the area.

“Huh… spider people have been sighted several times over the year, and there’s a reward for anyone that can catch them on camera…”

You squinted at the pamphlet in your hands, trying to read the small print at the bottom. “What does that say? It’s so small…”

With a shrug, you stuffed the pamphlet into your bag, pulling out the bug spray instead and spraying every bit of bare skin. Mosquitos just loved you, and you didn’t want to be itching the whole bus ride home.

As you walked up the mountain trail, you took many pictures, but mostly of the gorgeous scenery.

A vast forestry landscape spread out beneath you, and the mountain path winded through the forest. As you continued walking, the path worn down by several years of hikers began to become more overgrown and less accessible.

“Huh… doesn’t seem like anyone’s been this far up in a while…”

When you thought about it, the stand with all the pamphlets was abandoned and dusty, the window broken. You just assumed they didn’t have the budget to fix it… but now you were second guessing yourself.

And that’s when a storm hit. Earlier that day you had heard something about a thunderstorm on the radio, but it was supposed to be that night, not now!

“Shit!”

You ran through the rain, slipping on mud and losing your way. The rain was so thick you could barely see in front of you. Tree branches scraped against your sides and caught on your clothes, ripping your sweater and scraping you up.

By the time you were finally able to take shelter in a nearby cave, you were absolutely drenched and covered in scratches and scrapes.

You slid down to the ground, panting and taking off your sweater, now heavy with water. It plopped against the ground, and you reached into your backpack.

“Fuck…”

Your phone had no signal, and you wouldn’t be able to go down the mountain to call anyone until the storm died down.

You yelped, jumping up from your seat and backing away from the entrance to the cave when lightning struck close by.

This sent you further into the cave, nearly tripping on the uneven, rocky ground.

Most would expect a cave out in the middle of nowhere to be cold and damp, and smell of moss and dust. Surprisingly, the further you traveled inside, the more… “cozy” it seemed.

It smelled almost like cinnamon and felt pleasantly warm. This made your shivering die down, your soaked clothes forgotten at the entrance of the cave.

Little did you know, you were slowly being lured in deeper by the inviting warmth and pleasant smell…

The first sign that something was wrong was a skittering that could be heard further into the cave. The hair on your neck stood up, but you tried your best to reason with yourself.

‘It’s probably just some rat or bug…’

But as your phone battery went out and darkness enveloped you without your only source of light, the noise got louder as whatever was making it approached.

You yelped when something brushed against you, and tried to scream, but your mouth was covered and something sunk into your neck…

Darkness.

——————

When you awoke, you felt something warm yet sticky enveloping you, keeping you from freezing while trapping you in place.

You were barely awake when you heard a purr like sound coming from the dark corner of the cave. A man’s face was barely visible within the shadows.

He was handsome, his eyes a dark red and hair a soft blonde, almost platinum color. It seemed he had been the one to trap you there.

“Hello, my dear. You’re finally awake…”

As soon as you were fully conscious, you began to struggle against your bonds, finally looking down to see what was keeping you from breaking free.

“Are those… webs..?”

You felt almost faint, staring down at the whitish, substance wrapped around you. It looked like thick, velvety ropes, but they were so sticky that you knew that they couldn’t be.

“Indeed.”

The man began to move forward, the same skittering sound appearing once more. You looked on in horror as his lower half was revealed.

Below his torso was not a set of legs like a normal, no, it was the abdomen of a spider.

‘The legend… is true?’

You had been captured by one of the spider people of myth…

“You must be scared… you’re just a human girl after all, and I’ve taken you away.”

He reached out, caressing your soft cheek with his hand. “But do not fear, I’m not planning on eating you, little one.”

His hand traveled down your face to your shoulder, his fingers playing with one of your bra straps.

“Far from it…”

Your cheeks heated up as he easily cut through your bra, his eyes on your now bare breasts.

“I’m in need of a mate to carry my eggs… and you’re the only woman that’s traveled to this mountain in ages…”

He breathed against your neck, licking the bite mark he left there earlier. “God, I could hardly hold myself back the moment I saw you. Such a plump, perfect woman, you’ll carry my eggs well…”

You whines as his lower half creates more webs, keeping you suspended in air, but freeing your soft cunt.

Quickly, he tore off your panties as well, growling lowly at the sight of your pretty, fat pussy. “Oh, my little mate, already this wet? Perhaps this was fate, for me to be sent this angel from above…”

He plunged a finger into you, pressing against your gummy walls and stretching you out as one of his spider legs nudged against your sensitive clit, just enough to stimulate you and get you to cum all over his fingers.

“There we go… such a good girl…” he purred into your ear, beginning to stroke his monstrous cock. He drew out several orgasms from you, prepping your virgin hole for him.

Within seconds, you were lowered down, your hips hovering over his as he nudged the head of his cock against you.

“Gods, you’re so soft…”

He kneaded your fat belly and thighs, purring in delight. “You’ll make such a good mother… you’ve got child bearing hips, like you were just meant to carry my eggs…”

Soft nips and nibbles were left on your neck and breasts.

“Every ten years, us driders go out to find a mate that’s suitable for us. I am the last of our kind, so there are no females left for me…”

He smiled, beginning to push in.

“But you… are not just going to be the woman that carries my eggs. You’ll be my mate, and I’ll cherish you.”

It was uncomfortable and painful, the way his cock stretched you out. You gritted your teeth and he cooed, but wouldn’t allow you to close your legs, two of his spider legs kept your thighs apart so he could sink deeper into your fat cunt.

“Shh, shh… it’ll feel good soon, my love…”

And he was right, his cock stretched you in such a delicious way, hitting all the right spots and making you cry out in pleasure.

He mounted you, fucking into your needy cunt as he groaned into your ear. “Gonna take my eggs, okay? My sweet girl, you’ll be such a good mommy won’t you?”

Suddenly you felt something push into you. Was that…

He was cumming, eggs filling up your pussy and settling into your womb. Soon your belly would swell as the eggs grew and developed, but for now, you were tired…

He kissed along your shoulders and neck, nuzzling into. Slowly, he lowered you down from the webs, curling up with you in a dark corner of the cave.

“You’ll be pampered, well taken care of… never again will you worry about a single thing…”

As you began to drift off to sleep, you realized that this creature truly thought you were beautiful… it made you happy.

So you snuggled into him, too full of cum and eggs to really even try escaping. Why would you?

You were loved… you felt truly beautiful for the first time in your life.

“I’ll prepare a cabin soon, there’s plenty of abandoned ones nearby. Wouldn’t want my mate to be uncomfortable.”

The way he nuzzled into you was filled with such love and care. He must have been lonely, being the last of his species.

So you decided to stay… at least for now…

Want a part 2? Send me a kofi and ask for it~

————————

NSFW TAGLIST: @sunset-214 @strawberrypoundtown @avalordream @icommitwarcrimes @bazpire @im-eating-rn @anglingforlevels @kinshenewa @pasteldaze @unforgettablewhvre @yoongiigolden @peachesdabunny @murder-hobo @leiselotte @misswonderfrojustice @dij-ology @i8kaeya @lollboogurl @h3110-dar1in9 @keikokashi @aliceattheart @mssmil3y @spicyspicyliving @namjoons-t1ddies @izarosf1833 @healanette @lem-hhn @spufflepuff @honey-crypt @karljra @zyettemoon1800 @exodiam @vexillum-moeru @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @binnieonabike @enchantedsylveon @mysticranger575 @readeryn68 @danielle143 @kittenlover614 @filthybunny420 @annavittoria-mm @makimamybelovedwife @blubearxy @omglovelylaila @toocollectionchaos-universe-blog @fruk-you-usuk-fans @wil10wthetree @hammerhead96-blog @slightlyusedfloormat

[incognit0slut]

A SPECIAL SHOW

Part 3 of kinktober | main masterlist

virgin!spencer x fem!reader; Lingerie, Exhibitionist/voyeur, overstimulation, squirting

No one would’ve guessed you liked to touch yourself in front of billions of people online, except for your roommate, who you thought would be a great addition to your next late-night session.

Words: 6,213

a/n: my kinktober is running late. Oopsss

THERE WAS SOMETHING EXHILARATING ABOUT BEING WATCHED. You reveled in the sensation of being the center of attention. You weren't sure how it started, nor when it started, all you knew was that every Friday night you were always seated—or sometimes laid—in front of your computer. Webcam on, chatroom on, and most importantly, your alter ego was on.

Princess_Pink is online.

It wasn't the most creative name, but it was your initial thought when you made your account. You had always taken a certain liking for the color pink. As for princess... well, there was nothing else to it, you just liked being called that.

Princess.no1.fan: i've been waiting for you!! Adam_4432: hey princess Keaton-bigdick: ready to jerk off to you baby Hardcock69: turn on your cam!

If you told your younger self that you'd be touching yourself in front of horny strangers online, you would've scoffed in disgust. Your past innocent self would definitely look down on your choices, which honestly, something you once had questioned too at one point. But the amount of money increasing in your bank account always stops you from doubting yourself.

It was partly the reason why you were still doing this. Your nine-to-five job wasn't going to cut out the expenses you needed, providing yourself in other ways was the only option. The reason was, yes, you needed the money, that was true. But deep down you were aware of how much you actually enjoyed doing this. If you once thought that these men watching you were disgusting, horny people, then maybe you were just as disgusting as they were.

And somehow you were okay with that.

Horny_BBC: turn your fucking cam on you slut JadenCums: don't talk to her like that JadenCums: she's not going to give us anything if we don't behave Princess.no1.fan: princess pretty please show us your sexy body

You turned your camera on. There it was, your reflection on the screen. Your baby pink lingerie, a silky second skin, clung to every curve, accentuating the elegant contours of your body with its deep neckline plunging gracefully. Your hair cascaded in loose waves, catching the soft lights in your bedroom, and illuminating your smooth skin. A coy, knowing smile played on your lips, revealing a self-assured confidence that was impossible to ignore.

"Hello, boys," you greeted, your voice deep and sultry. "Did you miss me?"

A chorus of replies filled the chatroom and you smiled. You loved the attention they gave you. It was something you never gained in your normal, mundane daily life, and you actually didn't mind it. You liked being the invisible quiet girl sitting at her own desk, minding her own business. But now you were exactly the opposite of that girl and you thrived on the desires that lingered in those who watched you.

But there was still some privacy that you needed to keep because honestly, you didn't want your coworker to know this secret life of yours. You used to wear a fancy mask that looked like it came out from a masquerade ball, but with how technology has developed, you now opted to use a filter that animated your features. It was perfect.

"I had a very rough week," you continued, playing with your hair. "But now that everyone is here..." You leaned forward, showing the soft curves of your cleavage. "...I feel so much better."

Adam_4432: fucking hot Keaton-bigdick: love the dress Keaton-bigdick: love it better on the floor

You giggled. "Patience, boys. You know how this goes. We play a little game along the way." You ran a hand through your hair. "So what game do you think we should play?"

Your eyes traveled along the comments. "Twister? How are we supposed to play that? Oh—Strip poker? That does sound good—wait! Yes! We should do a classic." A smile curled on your lips. "Truth or dare."

Fatcock_777: ok truth or dare princess?

You rolled your eyes. "Truth, duh. We're starting this slow."

You scanned through the comments and picked a question that seemed easy for you to answer.

Pussylicker: have you ever masturbated in public

"I have masturbated in public," you responded, biting your bottom lip teasingly as you looked straight into the camera. "I once touched myself at work because... well, I was desperate. Locked myself inside the bathroom and fucked myself with my fingers, it was so hard keeping quiet."

You then laughed at yourself. "Alright, next question. I'm still choosing truth, by the way."

JadenCums: will you ever bring a guest here? JadenCums: would love to see you getting fucked

This time you wiped your tongue along your lip. The mere thought of having someone else please you who was not yourself, right in front of these strangers online, aroused you in a way you never thought possible. You clenched your thighs together as you imagined yourself in front of the camera while somebody else was here to touch you, to tease you—to fuck you.

"Bringing somebody else here? Sounds amazing, to be honest," you answered. "But you see, I don't think I know anyone willing to do what I do—"

Bang! Clink. Clink.

You stopped yourself and frowned. A sudden sound vibrated through your room, a jarring clash of clanging and clattering emanated from what seemed to be the kitchen. Your eyes darted toward the noise, curiosity, and concern merging on your face as you attempted to discern its source.

Another clatter followed through, louder than before.

"Wait a minute, boys," you mindlessly said to your audience, your eyes still narrowing on your bedroom door. "I'll be right back."

You quickly turned off your camera and muted your microphone, ignoring the protests thrown in the chat, and rose from your bed. With measured steps, you left the sanctity of your room and ventured into the adjacent kitchen. Your steps halted right at the moment you found your roommate stooping down to retrieve a fallen pan. The metallic clang resonated briefly, then subsided, replaced by the soft rustling of clothes and the muted glow of ambient lighting.

"Spencer?" You called out softly, your voice carrying a note of concern.

He straightened up, holding the pan in his hand. His response was apologetic, a musing note in his voice, "Sorry if I woke you. I couldn't sleep, and I thought drinking something warm could help me relax."

Your eyes wandered to the carton of milk that sat on the counter. "So you decided to make warm milk?"

"Apparently we ran out of tea..."

His voice trailed off as he looked up from the fallen pan, and as he met your gaze, time seemed to slow. His apology hung in the air, a mere whisper, as his eyes found your figure in the soft glow of the kitchen lights. The lingerie you wore, delicate and pretty, cast your curves in a subtle, alluring way.

There was one word to describe your roommate. Cute. He was really cute. If he wasn't so oblivious to your little, innocent crush, you'd already be worshiping the ground he walked on. Maybe you should've told him how you found his habit of dumping facts endearing, but then again, you felt as if he had been avoiding you ever since he found out about your late-night rendezvous with your computer.

Keeping it a secret from your friends, family, and colleagues was easy, you didn't see them often. But keeping it a secret from Spencer, your roommate who you see every day, who bluntly asked why you were whining every Friday night at the exact same time, was hard.

Surprisingly, you thought you'd be appalled by telling him the truth, but something about him made you spill out what you had been doing behind your bedroom door. He seemed like the type of person who never judged, and he obviously didn't when you told him you were doing it for the money. But even though he accepted your secret without pressing any further, you realized, he had been avoiding you ever since.

For a heartbeat, silence enveloped the room, broken only by the distant hum of the refrigerator. Then he finally tore his gaze away, clearing his throat, attempting to regain his composure. "It's Friday, huh?"

You stepped closer, your bare feet making a soft padding sound on the kitchen floor. "Yeah."

"Well, uh, you can go back to what you were doing. Don't mind me."

You couldn't help but study him with a sense of quiet fascination. There was something utterly captivating about the way he appeared in this unguarded moment, and you couldn't resist your curiosity as you observed his relaxed, almost nonchalant demeanor.

Your eyes trailed over him. The lower half of his body was swathed in loose-fitting pajama pants, their fabric patterned with a subdued design. The shirt he wore was equally unpretentious, and its well-worn, soft texture cradled his upper body loosely. His hair seized your attention next. It was disheveled and slightly tousled, its tips barely touching his shoulders.

Yet, it was his hands that captivated you the most. His hands were notably broad, his fingers long and deft. The veins that traced along the back of his hands were what had you staring further, and as you caught the way they flexed whenever he moved between the narrowed space, you wondered what it would feel like to have them on you.

And now the question from earlier kept on repeating in your head. Will you ever bring a guest here? If you had to choose someone else to please you, your answer would definitely be him.

"Hey, Spence?" He looked at you, and under the intense scrutiny of his gaze, your nerves tightened their grip on you. You quickly shook your head. "Never mind."

"No—wait. What is it?"

"It's nothing, just forget it."

He took a step forward, closing the gap between you. "Tell me what you were about to say."

It was now or never, at least, that was what you kept convincing yourself. You then braced for the question that had been lingering on the tip of your tongue. "How do you feel about joining me?"

You noticed the frown forming on his face. "Joining you?"

"Yes, for my stream." The baffled look he gave you made you explain yourself further. "You don't have to be naked! And if you must know, I use this cute filter to hide my face in a way, but if you don't like that, you can be completely anonymous. I'll make sure your face is out of the frame."

You wanted to kick yourself. The silence that came after your proposition was gnawing at you, almost as if it was mocking your brassness. This was Spencer Reid, the hot-shot FBI agent you lived with who had been avoiding you for the exact reason, and you were now inviting him to join you? What on earth were you thinking?

"See? This is stupid. Forget I said anything—"

"What do I have to do? If... if I don't have to be naked."

You blinked, caught by surprise for a moment, and then your lips curved into a coy smile. He was interested.

"You can play with me."

You took a step forward.

"Touch me."

You took satisfaction in the way his eyes lowered down your body.

"Please me." Your eyes bore into him, liking the way they turned a shade darker as he kept staring at your cleavage. "Who knows? Maybe you'll be able to sleep after this."

His eyes swept along the expansion of your neck before they met your gaze. "Just... touch you? That's it?"

"That's it," you confirmed. You wanted to ease the tension, so you joked  with a playful grin, "I'll split the money with you from this stream."

Spencer softly chuckled, the tension easing from his shoulders. "No, keep it. People pay to watch you, not me."

"So is that a yes?"

He exhaled a deep breath. "...yeah?"

It was really happening. Before he could regret his decision, you quickly reached for his hand and guided him to your room. He followed you quietly, and when you pulled him in, his eyes swept across your personal space, taking in the predominant color palette of pink that seemed to envelop the space with a cozy, feminine charm.

The heart of your room was undoubtedly your computer setup, strategically placed directly in front of your bed. There was a small camera perched on top of the screen and a professional mic placed to the side, and to be completely honest, the sight of everything was starting to intimidate him.

"I need to tell you something," he softly began. "This is my first time doing this."

You gently squeezed his hand. "I'd be surprised if you've ever done this before. You're not even on social media."

"No, I mean—" He turned you around to face him. "I've never touched someone... intimately."

"Really?" Your eyes shot up as you noticed the way he emphasized the word. "Wait, Spencer... are you a virgin?"

There was a pause as he searched your eyes hesitantly. "Does it make me weird if I told you I am?"

Somehow that didn't surprise you, since you never actually saw him taking an interest in relationships, so your response was swift. "No. You're always weird regardless," you quipped, dissipating the tension with a teasing grin. "I'm kidding."

He smiled, although his question still lingered in the air, and he shifted the focus back to you again. "Do you still want me here?"

"I should be asking you that question, silly. Are you fine with all this?"

To your surprise, his response was affirmative. "Surprisingly, yes, I am."

"Then there's nothing to worry about."

He still looked nervous though, and without putting much thought into it, you closed the distance and stood on your tiptoes. Your hands softly held his jaw, and the moment you pressed your lips onto his, a sound of satisfaction erupted from his chest.

You sighed in contentment as you felt his hands sliding around your waist, holding you closer as you moved your lips against his. The kiss was slow and lazy, yet the sensation of it traveled along your body, leaving you almost breathless as you felt his tongue teasing your entrance. A moan slipped out of you as you buried your hands in his hair, tugging onto the strands desperately as your tongues collided with one another in a delicate trance.

Your lips on his were hot, soft, settling, and wet, pulling onto each other for more and when you finally stopped, his eyes were closed, heavily exhaling, his hair ruffled, and he looked like the prettiest mess ever.

"W- What was that for?" He whispered, still in his dazed state.

"Setting the mood." You slowly pulled away and walked over to your bed, sitting at the edge of it, positioning yourself back in front of your computer. "For someone who has never had sex, you sure know how to kiss."

He collected himself and looked at you as if you had offended him. "I've kissed other people before."

"I can tell." You then narrowed your eyes at him. "Alright, you ready?"

"I..." He took a tentative step forward. "I think so."

With practiced efficiency, you started up the stream again. The moment you turned on your microphone and camera, almost immediately, comments began flooding in. The chat scrolled rapidly. You let a mischievous smile tug at the corner of your lips as your eyes flicked to the monitor.

"Hey, everyone, sorry for leaving you so suddenly. But I guess this is your lucky day... because I have someone joining me tonight!" A chorus of excited responses flooded the chatroom and you giggled at the enthusiasm they were giving you. "Oh my, didn't know you guys really wanted a guest over here."

Pussylicker: fuck yeah Princess.no1.fan: don't know if I should be excited or jealous Adam_4432: gonna fuck my cock watching you Fatcock_777 sent a $100 gift

Easy money, you thought to yourself, and by the way Spencer's eyes went wide, he also caught the amount of money sent to you when you were barely doing anything. "They give you that much for saying that?"

You couldn't help but laugh at his innocence. "Spe—" You stopped as his name almost slipped out your mouth. You cleared your throat and quickly corrected yourself. "Babe, they can hear you."

The pale complexion of his skin accentuated the subtle blush that tinged his cheeks, a result of either your affectionate tone or his embarrassment over his unfamiliarity with the situation. "Oh." He stared at your computer screen with uncertainty, his gaze filled with hesitation. "Right."

You urged him to come closer with your hand. "Come here, pretty boy."

He cast a fleeting glance in your direction, prompting an eye-roll as you observed his clumsy approach towards you. You eyed the camera and addressed your audience, "He's a little shy, please be nice to him."

As soon as he entered the camera frame, the comments section buzzed with curiosity. Many viewers wondered about the identity of this mysterious man, who happened to appear just as someone questioned a potential guest on the stream. Most of the other comments were positive, stating how excited they were, but a few of them disturbed you when they mentioned Spencer's physical appearance and how 'this fucking twig' didn't deserve to touch you.

You quickly guided your mouse to block them.

"I told you to be nice," you emphasized, your voice carrying a subtle edge. "I don't tolerate any form of harassment."

Spencer, seemingly oblivious, frowned at you. "What did you do?"

"Kicking disrespectful people out," you answered for him. Then, directing your attention towards him, you rose from your bed and gestured to the empty space. "Sit here."

He followed your instructions, settling onto the soft mattress as you adjusted your camera at a lower angle, making sure his face remained hidden from view. When you were satisfied, you instructed him to scoot back, which he happily obliged, because how couldn't he? He was captivated by what was happening.

Spencer never thought he would have his lower half on display—albeit still fully clothed—in front of thousands of people online. Yet here he was, sitting right in front of a camera, watching you as you slipped your knee between his thighs, urging him to part his legs. Nervous energy pulsed through him as he found himself in such close proximity to you, especially when you started to kneel right between him, clutching his shoulders as you steadied yourself.

"Someone dared me to show my cute panties," you mused, and even when you were addressing yourself to the stream, your eyes were locked with his. "Help me show them, babe."

His heart quickened as he looked up at you. "W-what do I do?"

You smiled at him and leaned down, pressing your lips against the shell of his ear, making sure he was the only one to hear you as you whispered, "Play with my ass, Spencer."

His breathing became shallow and erratic. He slowly reached out and put his wide hands on your hips before sliding them along your ass cheeks. He gently kneaded them, squeezing them with the utmost delicacy as if he was holding himself back.

Spencer had always been a gentle person, it was a fundamental aspect of his character, something he had known from the depths of his being. You liked that about him, it differentiated him from all the men you had ever been with. But right now you needed him to touch you with the same urgency you craved. You needed him to let go.

"You can do better than that, pretty boy," you pressed on, brushing your lips along his jawline. "Show the audience what they want."

Something in him switched at that moment. Maybe it was the way you were kissing down his neck. Or maybe it was the way you were pressed against him. Whatever it was, he suddenly felt less inclined to be gentle and, instead, he gripped onto your cheeks with more power. He squeezed them, holding your flesh with so much vigor that you had to hold onto him, burying your face in his neck.

He glanced past your shoulder and caught your reflection. He couldn't believe those were his hands on the screen; touching you, teasing you, pleasing you. You were definitely pleased with the way you kept on squirming against him. It mesmerized him how much you were responding to his simple touch, and now when he knew he could make you sigh in pleasure, he wondered how much more you could react the more he touched you.

Spencer pressed his hands at the back of your thighs before trailing them up your legs. He paused for a moment, hearing the way your breath quickened with anticipation, and smiled to himself when you let out a whimper as he squeezed your flesh again. The hem of your lingerie rode up your hips every time he moved, and your laced panties, with their fabric barely covering your already wet sex, were on display for the audience to see.

Hardcock69 sent you a $100 gift

He cocked an eyebrow, fascinated by how showing a little skin could earn you money. Curiosity took over him, and he let his fingers trail between your flesh before spreading them apart, showing off your wet patch to the camera. You arched your back, pressing your lips into his neck again as your arousal shot through your veins before it pooled right in your center.

Princess.no1.fan sent you a $100 gift

Interesting, Spencer thought, and slipped his fingers between the soft material of your panties before sliding it to the side, exposing your wet skin. His eyes shot up when someone gifted you another hundred dollars, and without much thinking, he brushed the pad of his fingers along your folds, loving the way you whined out a desperate moan right into his ear.

"You're doing great, baby," you told him breathlessly. Hearing your encouragement only made him want to please you even more. He let his middle finger glide along your dripping pussy, mesmerized at how wet you were, and braved himself as he slowly pushed his finger inside you.

He couldn't stop the sound of pleasure erupting from his chest when you squeezed around him. You were so wet, so warm, so incredibly tight. He thrust his finger in and out of you and you mewled, arching your back, grinding your hips toward his touch. And just as you were about to relish the sensation, he abruptly pulled his finger out of you and held you by the hips, gently pushing you off of him.

"Somebody dared you to turn around," he said, licking his lips as his eyes trailed along the front of your body, stopping right at your cleavage.

You smiled, amused that he was actually reading along the comments while touching you. Without saying a word, you got off the bed, your back still facing the camera. Your hands gently slid up your lingerie and you tugged on your panties down your legs, not forgetting to arch your back while doing so, making sure the camera captured the soft curves of your ass.

Spencer watched you intently. He watched the way your body swayed from each movement, appraising the swell of your breasts and the way your nipples pressed against the thin material of your lingerie, slightly teasing him behind the see-through lace. His eyes skimmed along your neck, stopping at your face, taking in the way you were looking at him with half-lidded eyes.

You were so beautiful. His fingers moved almost of their own accord, reaching out as if guided by some unseen force, wanting to touch you further. He rested a hand on your hip while his other hand slipped behind your neck, pulling you closer as he slightly reached out, meeting you halfway in a soft, enchanting kiss.

You melted right into him. His unexpected kiss threw you off as you weren't prepared for how passionate he was exploring your mouth; nipping your bottom lip, softly sucking the flesh as he pushed his tongue into you. He was kissing you as if he couldn't get enough of you, as if the first time he tasted you ignited the passion within him, forcing yourself to surrender to his touch.

As much as you wanted it to last, you pulled away, pressing your forehead against his, completely breathless as if the sheer magnitude of his kiss had stolen the very air from your lungs. "We should... we should keep the show going."

Your words reminded him that you were still being watched. "...Right."

Finally pulling away from him, you turned around and faced your monitor, reading along the comments on the screen. Although the camera didn't capture your kiss, the intimate atmosphere was unmistakable, and many of your followers began speculating about the identity of this mysterious man. They raised questions, even going so far as to wonder if he was your boyfriend.

How you wished that was true.

You shook your head and focused on the other comments, picking up the ones where they were throwing you some dares. One of them insisted for you to spread your legs in front of the camera which was honestly something you plan to do anyway.

So you sat between his legs, pressing your backside against his crotch, and stifled a moan when you felt his cock pressing into you. You could tell how hard he was, how aroused he seemed just by touching you. It was undeniably satisfying to be the one who had evoked such a response from him.

You leaned on his chest, placing your head right in the crook of his neck, and slowly spread your legs apart, finally exposing your flesh. Spencer could feel his slacks tightening, feeling himself going hard at the sight of you. The soft, ambient light in the room played a delicate dance upon your wet skin, accentuating its flawless smoothness. He also realized he wasn't the only one mesmerized by you, the chatroom also seemed to be buzzing with excitement.

Horny_BBC: sweet fucking pussy Horny_BBC: dripping wet JadenCums: holy shit I need to fuck you Pussylicker sent a $100 gift Prince_Casper: I dare you to finger her tight little pussy pretty boy

"I think they dared you to do something, baby," you mentioned, arching your back and spreading your legs wider. But Spencer's attention was somewhere else, most precisely, on your chest. Your nipples were begging for attention and he couldn't help but reach out his hands over the swell of your breasts. He gave them both a gentle, appreciative squeeze, admiring the way they looked in his hands.

"Babe," you whispered, your voice almost coming out as a whimper. "T- That's not what they want."

"But it's what I want," he said absentmindedly, too focused on watching the way his large hands covered your breasts. "They can wait a little longer."

His hands then moved to tug down the straps of your lingerie, your breasts spilling out from the sheer lace material and he groaned at the sight. "You're beautiful," he praised you, earning a soft blush along your cheeks. He palmed them again, watching the fleshy, supple skin contort around his touch. "No wonder everyone loves seeing your body."

Your breath quickened as you felt the sensations intensify, pleasure coursing through your body. "Are you sure you've never touched anyone before?"

He hummed a reply as he pinched your nipples between the calloused pads of his fingers, tugging them from your body as he cherished the gasp that left your lips. Letting go as he watched your breast bounce at the motion before repeating the action, wanting to pull more of those noises from your pretty lips. His eyes glanced over to the screen and smiled in satisfaction when your subscribers gifted you again.

"See? They like these as much as I do," he mentioned, giving your breasts a final squeeze before down your stomach, across the dip of your navel, up and down the thickness of your thighs until he stopped between your legs. Fingers lathered down your slit, feathering at your folds and experimentally teasing around your entrance. He watched himself as he pressed onto your pussy lips, spreading them apart for your viewers to see.

This position wasn't unfamiliar to you, you had spread your legs for the camera countless times, but to have another person touching you overwhelmed you in a way you didn't know possible. And when you thought you couldn't take more of the pleasure building up in your body, he proved you wrong by pressing a finger right onto your clit, making circular motions right on top of it.

You couldn't help but let out a moan louder than you intended to. "Babe..."

You gave into the sensation, watching as his fingers continued their exploration. You could already feel him harden with each steady, rhythmic beat of his heart while his fingers explored you, collecting the slick of your arousal before spreading it along your folds.

Hardcock69: fuck her with your fingers Hardcock69: ruin that sweet little pussy

Spencer didn't have to be asked twice, sliding his middle finger into you. You let out a gasp. "Fuck, baby..." Your eyes were transfixed on the screen as you watched the way his hand flexed, slowly pumping his finger in and out of you before adding another one, stretching your inner walls.

You whimpered as he began to thrust into you and your body jerked involuntarily. Your room was quickly filled with the lewd sound of his fingers plunging in and out of you as he kept a steady pace, fingers rutting into your tight hole, your slick inner walls clenching around him with each thrust. He watched your reflection on screen with curious eyes, catching the way your breath hitched and the way your lips fell split.

His fingers were long and thick, dragging along your walls. The moment of gentleness was suddenly gone when he picked up the pace. The speed turned into a ferocious one as if he was trying to reach deep inside of you and force something out. A reaction. He wanted to force another reaction out of you, more than you were giving to him now.

"That's it—fuck." You gasped, feeling that familiar coil in your stomach. "Don't stop. Don't fucking stop."

He curled his fingers inside of you, making your body jolt. He pressed the palm of his hand on your clit, and with every thrust, his skin rubbed against it. Your hips jerked against him again as a tiny moan escaped your lips, your head slumping against his shoulder.

"Faster," you managed to squeak. "I-I'm close."

Who was he to disobey your wishes? He obliged to your needs and pumped his fingers in a mind-numbing speed. The intensity made it hard for you to think, your body trembling as you felt the coil inside you tighten desperately.

A guttural whine left your lips as he began to pump his digits in and out of your sloppy pussy, focusing on the same spot inside of you with each flick of his wrist. Your mouth parted in a squeal as your toes curled, the soles of your feet digging into your mattress as he continued to thrust his fingers inside you, helping you to ride out your release.

Maybe it was the inexperience of sex, the way he had never seen a woman come undone right before him, that piqued his curiosity. It was his first time, and he found himself irresistibly drawn to the unknown, his eagerness to explore and understand the human body, especially your body. Every sensation, every moment, was tinged with the exhilaration of discovery, which led him to continue rocking his fingers into you, not slowing down even when you were a whining mess.

"Baby..." you whimpered. "W-What are you doing?"

Adam_4432: fuck her again Pussylicker: keep going pretty boy Pussylicker: don't stop even if she begs you to Pussylicker sent you a $200 gift

A new surge of pleasure engulfed you, a sensation unlike before. It coursed through your veins like a sweet, intoxicating elixir, so utterly consuming. Your hands clutched at the bedsheets, kneading them between your fingers as you felt this unusual sensation creep up on your lower half. It became so overwhelming your body was trying to ignore it, your eyes clenching shut as his fingers continued to pump into you.

"Oh, shit," You gasped. "I-I can't—"

Spencer's eyes flickered between the comments telling him not to stop and the way your body trembled in his arms. His free arm slid around your waist, pulling him into his chest as he gently whispered, "Do you want me to stop?"

Your lack of an answer was enough for him to keep going, digging his fingers deeper inside you, pressing onto that same spot repeatedly. He felt you shaking again, noticing the way your mouth fell apart as you gasped for air.

"I got you," he said softly, his eyes trailing down your body and his fingers between your legs. "Breathe," he instructed, slightly pausing when you clenched around him.

"N-No, don't stop," you begged him. "I can take it."

He curled his fingers again and you arched your back, hips bucking against his hand. "Oh god," you cried out, your voice sounding a little raw. "That's it—fuck, I'm gonna cum again."

He started to speed up, a sound of pleasure leaving his lips when your pussy started to squelch. It didn't take long for you to reach your second high as he doubled his movement, thrusting into you faster. You were shaking uncontrollably, and as you were about to calm your breathing from the overwhelming pleasure, another sensation burned between your legs.

You tipped your head back as it traveled along your body, clamping your thighs together only for him to push them apart again with his other hand. Every touch from him sent shockwaves of ecstasy, making your limbs quiver and your breath hitch. The sensation was so consuming that it turned your thoughts into a mushy, incoherent whirlwind, rendering your mind of rational thoughts.

"F-fuck, fuck, fuck," you cried out. The intensity of it overwhelmed you to the point your tears began to flow. "R-right there—"

JadenCums: HOLY FUCK Prince_Casper: SHE'S GONNA SQUIRT Prince_Casper: FUCK HER FASTER!!!!!  Pussylicker sent you a $100 gift Adam_4432 sent you a $200 gift

Your body trembled uncontrollably, each shiver echoing the overpowering sensations that consumed you, and you couldn't hold it anymore. A harsh whine was torn from your lips as your release rippled through you. You gasped as your cunt began to convulse, a clear stream of liquid gushing from between your thighs as you cried out, "Spe—"

Spencer grunted as he clamped your mouth with his free hand, stopping you from calling out his name. He quickly pulled his hand and rubbed your clit furiously as he tried to coax more of the liquid from your convulsing body. Your body quivered as his meticulous touch kept you teetering on your high, the pleasure flowing through you as you continued to come undone.

He watched as your chest rose up and down, your perky breasts moving every time you tried to calm your breathing. Your body was still shaking in the aftershocks of your orgasm, but you didn't want your viewers to see you in your most vulnerable state, at least not now when you were still trying to comprehend what just happened. So you sat up and quickly turned off your stream before you glanced at your drenched sheets and the mess you splattered across your desk.

“I- I’ve never—” You were shocked, the sensation completely new to you. "That... that never happened to me before."

You could hear the triumph in his voice as he replied, "Really?"

You were torn between amusement at his gloating and embarrassment at your own overwhelming experience. You turned your head to see him sitting there, grinning sheepishly at you. Your eyes flickered between his legs, noticing the outline of his cock pressing against his pants, and even by the shadow of it, you could tell his size was bigger than you anticipated. 

It didn't take long for you to make a move, really, because he was staring at you with doe eyes filled with lust and you couldn't stop yourself from climbing onto his lap, earning a moan from his lips as you settled right on top of his cock. Your wetness covered him and it took a lot of self-control for him not to pounce at you right at this moment.

"Hey, Spence?" Your voice was sweet, the tone of it reminded him of the way you had asked him to join you when you both stood in the kitchen. His ears perked up as he held you by your waist.

"Yeah?"

You smiled down at him. 

"What do you think about losing your virginity?"

He had never agreed to anything so fast in his life.

[flagellant]

Hello, tumblr! I mentioned this in my stream last night with my friend and collaborator @lakemojave, but here is the official tumblr announcement: I've started a fundraiser to pay for GAS that I can't afford on my own.

I...try my best to appear pretty unflappable on this site, because my online persona relies on that. But about two years ago I was harassed by TE/RFs and no matter how much I tried to forget or get over it, there was a comment that a 17 year old made towards my appearance the has probably been the most devastating thing I've ever felt, and ever since that insult I've grown steadily and steadily more disgusted and anxious about my appearance--specifically my hair.

As an AMAB trans person, I'm of course going to experience male-pattern baldness. Even in cisgender men, more than 75% of them experience some form of heightened anxiety and dysphoria due to hair loss or fear of it. I don't know how those numbers change when talking about trans people, but I can't imagine it's not even higher.

In the interest of full transparency at the cost of, frankly, my pride: I have reached the point in my dysphoria where I am growing to be borderline suicidal. I've struggled with suicidal ideation since I was a young teenager, but this is the first time in over a decade that I've reached a level where I am terrified what will happen when it gets worse.

And so with all that said, I've started a fundraiser on PayPal to try and raise money for my gender-affirming care. Y'all might remember me from the Great Soy Sauce Conspiracy of late December of last year, and maybe also how I stopped working on the project due to mental health reasons. I remember how kind all of you were when I was struggling with living newly on my own trying to afford food and things like convection plates, and it's my hope that I could rely on you all to help me again.

With that said, I've made the decision that if I am able to fulfill this fundraiser's cost...I'm going to pick back up The Mysterious Appearance of Miss Appleton and finally finish it once and for all...in video essay format, because that feels most appropriate to me. I think I'm going to be ready for it this time.

If you've read this far, thank you so much. If you need it, though:

TLDR: I need to get myself gender-affirming surgery because i'm getting real close to suicidal over my dysphoria. I've made a fundraiser for it. If the fundraiser is successful, I'm going to finally finish the video essay for The Mysterious Appearance Of Miss Appleton. Thank you for your time and your help.

[basicallyreigenarataka]

jjk men x streamer!reader hybrid smau

╰┈➤ Collab?

chapter one

ೃ⁀➷ you start your stream with gojo, your childhood best friend who happens to be internet famous. you’re surprised to see how people react to your presence on his live.

masterlist. prev. next

you were nervous to answer the call that rung from your pc, shaking for godsake. it was not that serious, you tried telling yourself over and over in your head.

but the thing is, it IS that serious! how did gojo already have five hundred thousand viewers, the stream just started???

you joined the video call after a moments hesitation, waving shyly at the screen. no way were you having internet anxiety, was that even a thing? online-anxiety.. the dsm-5 definitely doesn’t categorize that as a disorder.

“hi,” you spoke in a much smaller voice than usual, one you use towards your professors or customers at work. gojo mustn’t have caught on to your shy and anxious behavior, considering he immediately started screaming about how excited he was to introduce you to stream and how excited he is to play with you.

his personality was overwhelming. it’s what drew you to him all the way back to when you were seven. it could be a lot at times- but it’s what made him so enjoyable to be around. if it were anybody else, it would give you a migraine.

“chat, stop acting weird.” you heard gojo say in a disgusted voice as you booted up your own stream and game, greeting all your fans and letting them know you’re streaming with gojo. they were all so excited for you! it warmed your heart, easing your anxiety. you’d just focus on your audience, not gojos almost one million- oh my god, one million?

you were going to question gojo on what was happening in his chat, worried they were making fun of you, but when you noticed he had one million viewers you almost passed out. this was terrifying.

you discreetly opened his stream chat, making small talk with gojo and your audience while you took a look at what people could possible be saying.

you were fucking shaking. this was NOT that serious- but you had such bad self consciousness, you just had to see what they were saying… were they calling you ugly? weird? oh no- where his diehard fangirls mad that he was streaming with a girl-

to your surprise, all you saw were nice comments. they were all complimenting you, asking gojo why he didn’t introduce you sooner. you were shocked, a small smile tugging at your lips as you continued to read.

GOJOMARRYME: EEE SHES SO CUTE! how does she only have 50k?!? GUYS MAKE HER FAMOUS!

gojosleftnutsock: is she dating gojo? love her already, im going to live vicariously through her

gojoandgetostan68: yn can i be your lap dog

sugurugetotv ✅: why have you never introduced us, gojo?

you had to stop yourself from reading before your face went bright red. no wonder gojo called them out, some of these messages were so weird. but the majority were sweet! you were glad you had a good first impression on everyone.

however, one message in particular caught your eye. he’s verified, you recognize his name from gojo. he’s talked about geto a few times, talked about how he’s going to play games with him but it’s not the same as playing with you. gojo just said that to guilt you, though.

“yn, who are you gonna play?” gojo asked, reeling you out of your thoughts as you realized you’ve already loaded into a match.

“i’ll play cloak and dagger,” you insisted, preferring to play support over any of the other roles. “how about you?” you asked, though you received no response.

“gojoooo?” you called out, eyebrows furrowing together as he went silent, still haven’t chosen a character. you wondered if the call bugged out, but when you looked at your video chat, he was still very much there. he looked upset about something, a look of… jealousy(?) on his face. you weren’t quite sure why he looked mad.

“you okay?” you asked, which seemed to snap him out of his trance. his face immediately twisted into a wide smile, “yea! my friends just being weird..” he muttered, though you could tell his tone was far from friendly. did geto make him mad? you weren’t sure, it wasn’t your place to ask so you just stayed silent.

gojo finally put his phone down, sighing as he looked at the character lineup. you were playing cloak and dagger, your teammates consisted of a solo player who chose doctor strange, while the other three were in a party and all played dps.

gojo was clearly upset this party of three stole his dps role, cursing about how a good team should have two of each role and then immediately also picking dps. well, you were totally losing this game.

toji never cared for his view count. he only streamed to play games with his friends, and get some money along with it. he was naturally successful and never cared how many viewers he had or lost.

until today.

he lost 16k viewers in the span of fifteen minutes. he thought he got cancelled for a good minute there, until his friends brought him into the loop of things.

sukuna of all people even tuned into gojos stream, what the hell? just for some random? it made no sense. sukuna and choso assured him the hype was for a reason, but until he saw you, he wouldn’t believe it.

toji scoffed, rolling his eyes when his friends finally joined his call and began naming off excuses as to why they were late to chat.

“right, just get on the game bro.” he spoke in his usual cold tone. those who don’t know him would think he was being harsh to his friends, but this was just how he spoke.

toji invited them to his party, the three of them queuing up for a match. toji was happy to see someone instalock support- cloak and dagger at that- usually nobody wanted to play healer. he was making small talk with choso when sukuna suddenly spoke up,

“chat told me we got matched with gojo and his friend.”

first chapter is up!! i’m so sorry, i know i said this would be an smau but clearly there’s more writing than pictures.. i want to do an equal amount of both but i have to add context for some things ):

tag list

@estella-novella @ourfinalisation @definetlythinkimanalien @fuckisthatahotghost @m-0ona @sillybillylamb @ayla-1605

[drdemonprince]

Regarding morality, i cant help it but feel like it is being used as a tool to maintain west exceptionalism/white hegemony (in the english speaking society), and Im in a phase where I just cant take it seriously anymore. Im S Korean and i felt frustrated at how the "west" painted the rise of anti feminism in south korea, as if koreans are "more sexist", as if painting the country as "morally inferior" helps women in s korea when korean feminists already go through such discrimination and prejudice. I saw some western online medias interviewing anti feminist korean men instead of, yknow, interviewing feminist women. Similar thing happened when kpop became popular; there were ppl criticizing the slave contract (it's an outdated law), plastic surgery (many western celebs also go through that), the industry being inhumane and uncanny (just blatant racism regarding Asians as "robotic, non-human") etc. None of these claims and views help to fix the issues in kpop industry. Being exposed to these types of comments really made me insecure about being korean at that time cause i would believe that my culture was "inherently morally inhumane". It sucked.

But it's not just western folks who think their "culture" is "less immoral"; while the relationship w western hegemony and koreans is really really complex, koreans tend to believe that west is "morally superior". The term westernized in korean basically means progressive, and for a long time until recently, koreans vyed (and somewhat still vyes) for western approval of their culture. I complained about how ppl viewed west as progressive and korea as more conservative and my cousin said "yeah, cause of history, that's just how it is".

It's not just korea though obviously. Zionists claim that israel's existence is justified because it is "lgbt friendly and respects women's rights". Even though what israel is doing to lgbt palestinians and palestinian women are horrifying and disgusting, but since zionists will believe that their morality is "better" therefore "inferior" palestine "deserve it". Thank god for terms like pinkwashing and purplewashing, otherwise i might have gone insane.

In a nutshell, i started to believe that current idea of morality is deeply colonial, racist and sexist. There are so many examples (like how violence done by individual black folks are heavily demonized, but a larger, more vicious and genocidal systemic violence done by white society at large is ignored or at least "thats just how it is-fied", mocking "unlikable" female celebs online etc.), like too many. Its so ingrained within our world. Believing this has been eye opening for me, and i feel more empowered due to it. Thank you for the space for me to talk about this.

wow anon you just said a whole word!!!! please keep talking and writing about this. I think you're really on to something important here

[babyjinsu]

[r/offmychest] my boyfriend objectifies me in an online forum and i feel sick.

pairing ; any riize member x fem!reader || reddit smau

warning ; harassment, disgusting nasty misogynistic online comments made to you, noncon imaginations, perverts, implication of wanting to tie up, taking pictures and posting without consent.

[r/offmychest] my boyfriend objectifies me in an online forum and i feel sick. posted by u/yn777 • 6h ago

hi everyone. this is my first time posting something on reddit because i don't know where else to go to. i feel sick, i'm terrified, i've been puking and crying, and i just feel so disgusting about myself. i'm ashamed and embarrassed to tell my IRL friends, and i don't want my parents to ever know about this. i don't even know if this is the correct subreddit to go to, but please hear me out.

i don't know what to do with this information and i'm going to lose it everytime i think about it.

so about three days ago, i had to use my boyfriend's laptop to do my assignment because mine broke. my cat nibbled at the corner of the screen and yeah. it just broke. the lcd cannot be used, and i wasn't in a rush to have it repaired because of the cost but i did (now), after this... thing.

my boyfriend ([age]M) was in the bathroom so i'm 110% sure he didn't hear me letting him know that i'm going to use his laptop and i didn't think it would be such a big deal since we've been a couple for 2 years now. my intention was purely just to open some websites to check for citations for my paper and not to snoop around as i trusted him completely.

but as soon as i opened the browser, multiple tabs were already opened, he didn't close it - it's just like, youtube, a website to watch movies illegally, football scores from a couple nights ago, and some kind of private forum community. i wouldn't have thought much of it since my boyfriend is those guys who does IT and computer science, and just knows a whole lot of stuffs about devices(??). he's the one who helped repair and update my phone. so i didn't find it weird for him to have a forum tab opened since he engaged in online discussions a lot.

the title tag of the forum was something like, "my girl at the most fuckable state and..." it got cut off because the caption/title was too long. i'm the type of girlfriend who doesn't mind if my boyfriend watches porn (not camgirls though...), as long as it doesn't impact our sex life or relationship, and he only watches it with me (TMI). but for some reason this time, it immediately made my heart and stomach drop. it felt REALLY off, and my instincts and guts were both telling me to check, and leave it alone.

i shouldn't have clicked it, oh my god. i wish i didn't. not because i love him and i'd rather not know what he does behind my back, but because i love myself and this. this changed EVERYTHING.

the forum is not like reddit, or 4chan. it's basically a private forum or a space for men to post and talk about their girlfriends in the most degrading ways. i saw some appreciations posts but nonetheless (in THAT type of website?). i saw guys sharing private, intimate pictures (obviously taken without consent, because some of the girls were sleeping, in the bathroom taken from the gap between the door, or simply just watching the television), humiliating stories about how awful the girlfriends are in bed... and just,, the most disgusting, objectifying comments i've ever read.

some guys post their girlfriends picture and asked if anyone wants to share. some asked other users/guys to rate, degrade, or just comment on the girlfriends appearance. some guys even doxxed their girlfriend's working address and captioned, "do what you want with the information".

i feel so fucking sick. as i'm writing this, i can't count how many times i've paused to take a breather and just pace around in my living room.

the thought of my boyfriend even being in that forum already twisted my insides, but then i saw his username, and me.

i clicked on his profile and saw that he had around 9 posts, but his activities/notifications were quite a lot. his account was created a few months after we got together and his username was literally my nickname and the year i was born, and his profile picture was my cat. the same cat that broke my laptop.

my face wasn't visible in the pictures he posted, it was covered with some stupid fucking emoji (just my face). but i knew they were me. i knew those pictures because they were all ones taken by him. i knew they were me because i recognised the couch, the bedsheet, the clothes, and all. it's just obvious.

they were pictures when we're being playful and intimate. some were just me in my pyjamas, or lounging around in his hoodie, and others were me napping or sleeping. i didn't even know he had those pictures.

but the captions. god.. the captions.

i can't even. i don't even want to repeat or write it down. it's so so fucking disgusting and humiliating, and i would NEVER ever thought they were written by him. he took those pictures, covered my face, opened the forum, captioned, reread, and posted. he had a lot of time to rethink about what he was doing, but he didn't.

stuffs like, "she acts all innocent but you guys have no idea how easy it is to put her in her place." "god i feel like fucking her in front of her ex-boyfriend sometimes. to think of how he got her first before me pisses the fuck out of me man. he's crazy for not tying her up when he had her tho." i can't believe this is how he views me.

another horrible thing was he didn't just posts about me, but he shits on my family members and friends too. he claimed that my friends are just shitty people in my life that needs to get a partner of their own so they can get the fuck out of my life. he also admitted into bullying the people i am no longer friends with.

but the comments were worse, or they both were, i don't fucking know anymore. just the most toxic, red-flag, misogynistic nonsense. they were saying how lucky my boyfriend is, and how instead of making the same mistake as my ex-boyfriend did, he (my boyfriend) should keep me leashed to the bed with a collar. that was the only comment my boyfriend replied to. he agreed, and added that he can't have other guys looking at me.

some wanted to share and pass me around. these are guys with wives and girlfriends, and daughters, and mothers, and sisters by the way. the comments and posts were from guys who probably seemed normal to you. these guys could be your colleagues, neighbours, classmates, professors, or even your dad.

he doesn't comment, interact, or engage on other people's posts. it was as if he only made the account to post about me. with how he covered my face, it seemed like he just wants to let out his sickening, disgusting thoughts unlike some of the guys in the forum. but that didn't make it any better.

i immediately closed his laptop after going through the forum and went out of the room before he stopped showering. i think he knows something's wrong with me because i haven't been talking to him much, or reacting, or responding to him. it's been three days, and i told him i'm sleeping over my friends' house. i don't know how long i can avoid or keep up with the lie. i'm shaking so much.

i don't know how to process this. he has always been so sweet and respectful to my face. on the surface, he's your parents' dream son-in-law. not once have i felt unsafe around him, until now, that is. he doesn't even seem like the type to do these kinds of things but i'm not sure now. the way he talks about me when i'm not around. like i'm some kind of trophy or an object for him to. yea. sexualise online. for strangers to see.

i feel disgusting, violated, harrassed, assaulted, objectified... everything. i don't know how, or even if i SHOULD confront him. what can he say to justify this? that it's a joke? what if he fucking kills me because i wasn't supposed to see it? should i report this to the police? he lets a bunch of strangers talk about me like that. he doesn't fucking love me.

i don't know what to do. i don't know what to do. i feel so fucking sick and scared oh my god. i don't know what else he could be doing behind my back. i'm so scared.

💭 omgg………… hehehehhehehe hope u guys enjoyyyy xoxooooo

[a-griffin-in-the-sky]

My first apartment was next to a street men joked about, because it was known for sex trafficked women. I had to walk to the bus stop in 30-degree weather, passing women standing out there in their underwear.

Two motels nearby, trucks parked out front I knew exactly what was happening. I saw it. It was horrifying. And the fact that men can see that and still laugh? That’s what’s truly sick

The only thing people should be joking about on that street is the guy who climbed the Krispy Kreme sign butt naked.

“lI want every pimp, john, and loverboy to know I hope one day another Wuornos finds you.l, you deserve no peace.

I’m glad I’m off that street now, in a better place with good family and roommates. But those women are still there. Just because I don’t see it anymore doesn’t mean it isn’t still happening. It never stopped it’s just out of sight

So when I say support sex workers, I mean it. We need to help them, i mean really help them,in whatever way we can.

Support doesn’t mean paying for the right to rape someone without resistance. Real support means fighting for their safety, freedom, and humanity.

I’ve seen a YouTube channel run by a man who films these women standing on the street and exploits them online for views. The comments are disgusting and dehumanizing.

And if you know that street, then you know what I’m talking about. You’ve seen it and It’s not a rumor or a punchline men make it out to be, it’s real. And the women out there deserve more than our silence.

Question for radfems:

Is there a street like this where you live?

If so, how do you feel about it,

How do the men in your community talk about it?

[feelslikefallingg]

Lukolas decided Jake Dunn was gay and then demanded he come out of the closet they shoved him into. Not because he labeled himself. But because he has gay friends. Because he’s played queer characters. They took a vague quote from an interview about masculinity and sexuality and turned it into a confession. Because they NEED him to be gay for their shipping fantasies. That was enough. That was all they needed to invent a whole narrative about who he is, and then weaponize it against him and against Nicola.

And even if Jake is queer—which none of you know and none of you are entitled to—queer men can date women. Queer men can fall in love with women. It does not cancel his closeness with Nicola. And it sure as hell doesn’t give you the right to harass him.

And don’t think you’re off the hook if you’re one of the “rational” ones. The quiet Lukolas. The ones who sit in the comments saying “I don’t support the bullying” but still follow accounts that openly mock Jake, drag Antonia, and accuse Nicola of lying. You see what’s happening. You see the posts trying to out him. You see the fake essays accusing Nicola of harming the queer community because she won’t announce your ship is real. And you say nothing.

Your silence is consent.

You don’t get to pretend you're the good ones while standing shoulder to shoulder with people who are stalking, erasing, and dehumanizing four real people. You are complicit in the harassment. You are letting it happen. You are giving it a platform.

And all of this for what?

For a ship based on chemistry during a press tour.

For a man who is publicly dating another woman.

For a fantasy you made up and can’t let go of, even when the truth is staring you in the face.

Jake didn’t ask for this. Nicola didn’t ask for this. Antonia didn’t ask for this. And Luke damn sure didn’t ask to be turned into a puppet in your weird obsession.

And now, maybe worst of all, you’ve decided Nicola is hurting the queer community because she won’t say what you want to hear. Nicola Coughlan, who has been one of the most consistent and vocal allies to the queer community. She’s raised money, spoken out when it was risky, and put her name behind real causes that matter. She is now coming under fire for doing exactly that—facing hate for defending trans rights—and instead of supporting her, some of you are turning on her because she's dating a man YOU have decided is gay.

And your disgusting behavior doesn’t stop there. You also harass Luke and Antonia. You’ve decided Antonia is the villain just because she exists.

You’ve decided everyone is guilty except yourselves.

You are not victims.

You are not revolutionaries.

You are not defenders of anything.

You are liars.

You are cowards.

You are abusers hiding behind Luke and Nicola's image and AI generated bullshit.

You don't get to erase people because they disrupt your fantasy. You don't get to assign identities to people who have never claimed them. And you don't get to pretend you're righteous when you're just cruel and ignorant.

Jake Dunn is a real person.

Nicola Coughlan is a real person.

Antonia Roumelioti is a real person.

Luke Newton is a real person.

The really sad and pathetic fact is.. most of you are women In your 30s, 40s, 50s, and 60s. Some of you probably have kids their age. How would they feel if they knew their mother was harassing people online because two people refuse to date?

You all need to leave them the hell alone.

[glai1023-blog]

F1 Drivers' Dating Tendencies and WAGs Haterism: A Rant

In lieu of the comment section fiasco with Lando and Quadrant receiving weird and downright disgusting comments because this man who is of legal age, with steady finances and weird job of driving fast around the world decides to date a woman who is not them is fascinating. In fact I find it really fascinating that a lot of these fans feel that they have a say with regards to these men's lives. These "fans" who decided that its their mission in life to dedicate a tiktok, twitter (x) or instagram accounts just hating on these women that the F1 drivers date is just astounding to me and I don't even consider myself normal. Do they not have a life other than making these negative comments of "oh Alexandra is making the China GP all about her" just because girly wanted to dress up in Chinese inspired dresses, "Kelly is faking her pregnancy to trap Max" well maybe he wanted to be trapped by her, "Kika is way too young for Pierre" yeah well, what do you care, she's a consenting adult.

These girlies wasting so much time finding faults on these WAGs, tagging them as toxic people when they themselves are being toxic (oh the irony) .

I once came across a hate page on tiktok dedicated to Alex enumerating how she's trying so hard to be seen as a fashionista and how she's always only posting aesthetic bougie stuff when her family is not that really wealthy that by the end of the clip I just felt sorry for the tiktoker because I feel like she's trying to find so much fault in Alex that it comes across as projecting her own insecurities which is really sad.

The Kelly hate pages are even worse (which I dont know why I always find these pages when I dont really look for them), there's that she's using Max's name to get modelling jobs, calling paparazzis herself to be pictured or how she's a bad mother. I mean, are these wrong accusations? Maybe, maybe not, We are not part of their lives or their circle so who or what are these people to think its their calling to be these Drivers' messiah from dating these women who we also know nothing about personally? And sometimes its not only teeny bopper girls who do these stuff. I would see a real mean comment sometimes and like try to see their profile (to get a feel of what type of person acts like this) and see a full grown adult 30ish woman acting like a crazy kpop fangirl to these drivers is so baffling, like Ma'am do you not have a job? or kids? Have a life, please.

Its okay to like a driver, its fine to have a favorite or to be a F1 fanatic. But fostering hate to people you dont know or know nothing about except what they post online is not normal behavior. Who these tax evading vroom vroom boys date or marry is not our concern. They have a life, we have our own and there is like maybe less than 10 percent chance that's gonna intertwine so maybe rather than being a toxic fan, just enjoy the highs and lows of your fave's career because they will not be there forever. They can lose their seat anytime, its already a very high stress and high stakes job for them, the last thing they need I think are a bunch of fangirls or fanboys adding toxicity in their lives.

You dont like who their dating is ok. Liking or admiring who they're dating is fine too. There's no need to make a hate page and making that your personality. Life is already hard and the world is already full of hate, if you are not making it a better place then maybe just not add to it.

[yvesssssssss]

HIIII TO THE BEST WRITER 🎀🧚‍♀️✨️

It's me, again!!!

I had an idea, where Sakamoto Days Men would be with a reader who doesn’t like to eat. It may seem a bit weird, or I don't know 😭...

It's just that it's what happens to me since I'm a kid. Often even seeing food makes me disgusted. It's not anorexia!!! I just don't feel the need to eat, as if I had already eaten. So now I'm underweight and forcing myself to eat more.

You can skip this request if you want, no problem!!!

It’s okay if eating feels hard sometimes. You’re not strange for that, and you’re not alone. Go at your own pace. Small steps matter. Be gentle with yourself; healing isn’t a race. You’re doing enough. You’re doing okay. And that’s something to be proud of. (Just to clarify, the request is completely harmless. It’s all about offering comfort and care, not judgment. The story focuses on understanding and support for someone who struggles with eating, with no negativity involved. It’s about showing empathy and kindness, because everyone’s experience is unique and deserving of love and compassion.)

Nagumo yoichi

Nagumo doesn’t pry—not right away. He’s the type to notice the pattern in silence. The way you push food around your plate, the too-smooth way you dodge mealtimes, the quiet fatigue in your eyes. He picks up on it without needing to ask, but he doesn’t treat it like a problem to be solved—more like a quiet part of you he wants to understand.

“You know,” he says one afternoon, flopping onto the couch beside you, long limbs stretching across the cushions like a cat, “I’ve faked eating dinner in front of assassins more times than I can count. But with you? I’d rather just sit and talk.”

His voice is light, joking even, like always—but his eyes are sincere. Nagumo’s eyes always say more than his words.

You mumble that food makes you feel sick sometimes. That it’s hard to want it. That it’s been that way for a long time, even as a kid. That people always look confused when you try to explain it, so you stopped trying.

His expression doesn’t shift into pity. Instead, it softens into something warm and understanding.

“Thanks for telling me, sweetheart. You don’t gotta explain yourself to everyone, y’know? But to me...” He trails off and reaches out, brushing your hair away from your face, fingers gentle. “I’m here, okay? No pressure. We’ll find what works. Even if it's just sitting together while you take a few bites of something small.”

Then he grins like it’s no big deal. “Besides, this gives me an excuse to make those stupid cute lunches. You’ve seen the ones online? With the pandas and the octopus sausages?”

He kisses your temple, then opens a small pink lunchbox he packed—something super simple, gentle on the stomach. A few lightly salted rice crackers, some sliced fruit in flower shapes, a little cup of miso soup that still steams. Inside, there’s a hand-drawn note. A doodle of the two of you and a silly pun: “You’re soy amazing.”

He doesn’t expect you to finish it. He doesn’t comment if you only take a nibble. He just sits there and chats about nothing and everything, feet propped on the coffee table, voice warm and easy.

He makes eating feel like just another quiet part of the day—something shared, not forced.

Shin Asakura

Shin hears it in your thoughts before you ever say a word.

The frustration. The guilt. The discomfort. The way your mind runs in circles—I should eat... but I just can't. Why can't I be normal about this?

At first, he doesn’t know what to say. He’s still young, and things like this aren’t written in any manual. His instincts scream to help you, but he doesn’t want to overstep. Still, he starts paying closer attention.

He watches the way you turn away when someone puts a plate in front of you. The way your hand hovers like you want to try but just can’t do it.

One evening, he gently sets a tray on the table in front of you. It’s not a full meal. It’s a small mug of warm broth—mild, barely seasoned—and a tiny bowl of soft white rice.

“I know it’s not much,” he says, sitting beside you, his knee bumping yours lightly, “but I figured maybe we could start really small. No pressure. And if it’s too much, that’s okay too.”

You blink at him, caught between guilt and gratitude. But he doesn’t push. Doesn’t pressure.

Instead, he opens a manga and starts reading it out loud, voice animated and goofy. “Okay, so get this—the villain's name is literally Egghead. Who names their evil genius that?”

His voice fills the room, light and warm and silly. He doesn’t watch you. Doesn’t measure how much you eat.

When you manage even a few spoonfuls, he pauses, glances over, and beams.

“You did great. Seriously.”

He means it. No expectations. No end goal. Just you, and him, and slow, gentle progress.

Gaku

Gaku notices fast—but he doesn’t ask right away. He watches you like he watches an opponent, picking up on subtle patterns. But when he realizes what’s going on, his concern doesn’t come out in soft words—it comes out raw and honest, the only way he knows how.

“You’re not eating,” he says bluntly one afternoon. “And I’m not mad. But it makes me worry, ‘cause I like seeing you strong.”

He’s sitting beside you on the floor, knees pulled up, a chopstick dangling from between his fingers. He looks over at you with that intense, sharp gaze—but there’s no accusation in it. Just care.

Then he gently hands you a little bowl—something warm, simple, with plain noodles and a light broth. No heavy smell. Nothing greasy. Just warm, nourishing comfort food.

“You don’t have to scarf it down or anything. Just... try a little? For me?”

You hesitate. You’ve heard these words before, but they always came with pressure. With stares. With disappointment.

But Gaku’s gaze doesn’t demand anything. He rests his chin on your shoulder and lets out a small sigh.

“I get it, y’know? Sometimes, even thinking about eating makes my chest tight. Not the same thing, maybe, but... close enough.”

He doesn’t say anything else. Just sits there, still and solid, the warmth of his body grounding you.

When you take a single bite, he leans over and nudges your arm. “Atta girl. Proud of you.”

And he means it. With every fiber of his chaotic, reckless self.

Uzuki Kei

Uzuki doesn’t say much at first. He notices, of course—he notices everything. The untouched plate. The quiet nausea. The way your shoulders hunch like you’re bracing for someone to scold you again.

But he doesn’t rush you.

One night, he sits beside you at the table, the silence between you soft and open. The air smells faintly of tea and fresh rain.

You’re both quiet. Your untouched food sits in front of you.

“You’ve felt like this since you were young, haven’t you?” he asks, voice so low it’s nearly a whisper.

You nod.

He folds his hands in his lap. His expression is unreadable for a moment, but his eyes are gentle. “I understand the feeling of not wanting to force something your body resists. It’s not weakness. It’s your reality.”

Then, in a rare moment of visible tenderness, Uzuki reaches into his coat pocket and sets something on the table: a small glass jar, filled with delicate tea leaves. Chamomile and ginger. Fragrant, calming.

“I found this blend in a shop near the coast. The old woman said it helps soothe the stomach and steady the nerves.”

He stands to boil water, his movements deliberate and quiet. When he returns, the tea is steaming in delicate cups, and he slides one toward you.

“No food tonight, if that’s what you need,” he says. “Just this. Let’s sit together.”

You sip the tea slowly. The warmth seeps into your fingertips, and you realize—he doesn’t need you to eat for him. He’s not waiting for a result.

He’s simply there. Calm. Unshakable.

He watches the steam rise, then glances at you, the corner of his mouth lifting.

“You’re not alone in this. You never were.”

And for once, you believe it.

[scentofdark]

Why Ciri made men cry? Male gaze talk

This is a bit outdated topic but I wasn't on tumblr back when the Witcher 4 Ciri shitstormed thru the internet and I remembered just now and couldn't resist the urge to comment. So.......

Back in 1975 or so Laura Mulvey in "Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema" wrote about the male gaze in cinema. She explained how male filmmakers impose their fantasies onto women, making them objects of display etc. She also introduced the dichotomy between the active male role and passive female role. [For more read the full article. It's a good piece of wisdom, available online.]

Basically, we as viewers, are so used to male protagonists, it's not strange for anyone. Women viewers "learned" to follow the male pov while watching a movie or playing a game. Men don't have that reverse skill. They hardly can put themselves in the female pov because they're not used to it. Hence we got so many comments about men feeling "uncomfortable" with the idea of a gameplay with a female protagonist. I don't have an issue with following a plot with the pov of Luke Skywalker, Harry Potter, Bilbo Baggins etc. If you can't play a game with Ciri, sorry Kevin but that's your own intellectual defect.

I find it so disgusting - being so used to the decorative and erotic role of women that a woman with agency makes you feel uncomfortable.

I was so delighted reading these comments. Because even just narrating from the female pov with a female protagonist is already an effort to deconstruct this patriarchal tendency.

And also - this I recently read in Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's "We Should All Be Feminists" - men don't really think about gender. They never had to. So they don't realize the problem of inequality and it's for them hard to grasp.

Men don't think about gender, until we give them a reason to. So we need more female protagonists to make men cry even more often. Of course, I know, NOT ALL MEN

Amen

[fangdokja-anon]

Hahaha! 🤣 your reaction to dottore aka the doctor and your about me posts makes me think you are not just online simp but also a hardcore masochist irl. By the way how did you get invested in yandere content? Like what was your first or most memorable encounter with it?

♡ Book 5. Ink & Insight (I&I): From Dead Dove to Daydreams. ; ♡ WC. 1,996 (contains video game spoilers)

Ah, so we’re calling me out this early? On my side blog no less? Bold move, Anon.

Let’s get a few things straight: I am not an online simp. If I were, you’d see me in the trenches of fandom spaces, writing dissertations on characters, engaging in debates, and swooning over every little thing they do. I don’t do that. I don’t simp.

I compare.

Because at the end of the day, I’m not fawning over fictional men—I’m simply coping. My husband won’t let me talk about him, so I settle for characters that remind me of him. That’s not simping, that’s making do with the resources available. And if certain fictional men share the same energy, demeanor, or sheer presence as my husband? Then naturally, I gravitate toward them. Not because I worship them, but because they remind me of him.

Now, onto the masochism comment. Do you think I write horror purely for the fear factor? For the thrill of it? Because if so, you’re mistaken. I write horror because it’s an intimate genre—it forces confrontation with the things most would rather avoid. It dissects, exposes, and breaks apart. It’s a genre of control and loss of control. And if I happen to enjoy that process, if I find something oddly compelling about the brutality of it all—

That being said, there is a line. There are characters that cross it. Dottore? Manageable. Gilgamesh? Handleable. But some characters? Some of them make me feel too much. And I don’t like feeling too much. I’d rather shoot them on sight than deal with the psychological damage they would inevitably cause. Not because they’re bad characters, but because their existence is disruptive.

Dottore, though? That man could dissect me, break me down to my component parts, run inhumane experiments on me, and I would thank him. He could reduce me to nothing, and I’d accept it. There’s no logic behind it, no deeper reasoning—just the simple, unavoidable truth:

Some people you kill on sight.

Others, you let ruin you.

Dottore falls into the latter category.

Now, STORY TIME (fangdokja lore).

Would you believe me if I said I hated yanderes before? And I don’t mean casual dislike—I mean full-on disgust. I found them creepy, mentally unstable, and fundamentally stupid. The idea that someone could revolve their entire existence around another person? That they could need someone so desperately that their sense of self dissolved into obsession? That was pathetic. It was unhealthy, it was irrational, and it was a complete rejection of self-sufficiency.

That was me as a kid.

Back then, I believed in fairy tales. I genuinely thought love was about mutual growth—about two people supporting each other in their careers, their personal lives, and their families. About building something together, side by side. The idea of romance being anything else—something consuming, something destructive, something one-sided—was outright repulsive to me.

Then I saw clips of Yuno Gasai. Instant NOPE.

Fast forward to my teenage years, aka the black-clothes-all-day, goth-adjacent-but-mostly-emo, people-are-annoying-so-I’ll-just-watch-horror era. Relationships were still stupid to me. The concept of needing someone for emotional validation? Idiotic. The idea of depending on someone for your reason to exist? Even worse. It all seemed pointless.

Then came horror.

I was already neck-deep in the genre by this point because, well, I hated everything and everyone. Horror was an easy escape—something darker, something honest. And naturally, when you spend enough time in horror, you will encounter yanderes. It’s inevitable.

Enter the golden age of Wattpad—the no monetization, anything-goes, unfiltered chaos era. I was already secretly reading fanfics at this point (because, for some reason, that was the one thing I was embarrassed about). I mostly read fluff—anything smut-adjacent was straight-up disgusting to me. I didn’t get it. At all.

Which makes sense.

Because at that point in my life, I had zero knowledge about sex. Like, I knew the technicalities—I knew the reproductive system, I understood the biological mechanics—but that was it. No porn, no hentai, no exposure to anything explicitly sexual. To me, "sex" meant literally sleeping next to someone. That’s what I was taught. And I never questioned it because I didn’t care. School was my priority—study, work, repeat. Learn, apply, profit. Simple.

Then I came across the term yandere.

I didn’t know what it meant. And when I read my first yandere fic? I was disgusted. Completely put off. It was one of those low-quality Wattpad dumpster fire stories, so that didn’t help, but the concept itself? The obsession? The violence? The sheer lack of logic? I hated it.

And yet, somehow, that wasn’t the end of the story.

✦✧✦✧

Fast forward a year.

At this point, I’d been playing video games my entire life, so naturally, I eventually stumbled into visual novels. And from there, it was only a matter of time before I ran into otome games.

And one of the most well-known otome games—one of the classics, the game that served as many people's introduction to yanderes—

—was Amnesia: Memories.

Guess whose route I hated the most?

Toma.

I was a Shin and Kent kind of player. Shin especially—he had the right balance of edge and depth (along with plot) that made him actually interesting. Even Ikki had his charm. They all had their faults, but at the end of the day, their routes were wholesome in comparison.

Also, Orion? Loved him.

Ukyo? Insane, sure, but he still had a genuinely good side. He made sense within the narrative, and at the very least, there was an internal logic to him.

But Toma?

Toma made me angry.

The moment he caged me, I was done. The moment he started spewing nonsense about trusting him while literally locking me up, I was sitting there, completely baffled, wondering:

"I thought this was a romance story—WHAT IS HAPPENING?!"

At the time, I didn’t even know what a yandere was. All I knew was that whatever archetype Toma was supposed to be? I hated it.

I hated him.

I hated all of them.

He was a creepy, possessive piece of garbage that I would not go near with a ten-foot pole. My entire reaction boiled down to one word:

CREEP.

And yet—do you see the irony in all of this?

I never got into yanderes romantically. Not back then. Not even close. It was impossible for me to feel anything for them. But fanfic-wise? I still found myself reading yandere content occasionally. Not because I was interested in the romance—but because of the horror.

Even then, I refused to engage with yanderes as a romantic concept, but as a horror concept? That was different. That was something I could respect. And admittedly? Even back then, there was one thing about yanderes that I could appreciate—loyalty.

No cheating. No exes they still care about. No third parties they’d even consider entertaining. A real yandere’s world revolves only around his darling. And that? That was at least logically sound. Even at my most yandere-averse, I could respect that much.

✦✧✦✧

But.

There was one character. One single character who changed everything. And to this day, I hate him for it.

I was minding my own business, peacefully gaming, completely unprepared for the irreversible shift about to occur in my perception of yanderes. And the man responsible?

Yuuya Kizami from Corpse Party.

…Which, in hindsight, says a lot about me. But let’s not unpack that right now.

At first glance, I liked him. Appearance-wise, attitude-wise, he seemed like a solid character. A bit of a loner, sure, a little blunt, maybe a little rough around the edges—but a reliable older brother figure. A nice guy, even.

And I was so, so wrong.

The moment his real nature was revealed—his yandere nature—I felt pure, visceral disgust. Immediate, instinctive NOPE. He went from a character I liked to a character that made my skin crawl.

…And yet.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, a tiny, traitorous thought formed:

"Wait… am I into this?"

And then:

"…Shiz. This is so unhealthy."

The cognitive dissonance was real. I was horrified, repulsed—and yet, somewhere in all that, something had shifted. I refused to acknowledge it, though. When he died, I cheered. I thought, “See? No problem. I didn’t like him. No big deal. Moving on.”

But I did not move on.

Because without realizing it, I started seeking out more yandere content. Not actively at first. Just… reading one more fic here. Clicking on one more story there. It wasn’t that deep. Just casual curiosity.

Right?

…Right.

✦✧✦✧

Fast forward a few years. The emo phase faded (mostly). I was still goth-adjacent, but I wasn’t walking around exuding pure, unfiltered misanthropy anymore. Just a chill, hyperfocused workaholic with a hardcore "study, grind, succeed" mentality.

Then came the Undertale phase.

Yes. I am admitting it. I was one of those people. Part of the squad that made Toby Fox publicly say, “Some of you concern me.”

And you know what? I do not care.

Because the Undertale fanfics? They were insane. Not just insane—they were PEAK. Some of the most unhinged, soul-crushing, haunting stories I’ve ever read came from that fandom. To this day, my favorite one-shot fanfic of all time—of all time—is an Undertale fanfic.

And guess what?

It’s a yandere fic.

A yandere Sans fic, to be exact.

Yes, I am recommending this fic. No, I do not care if it raises concerns. This author wrote two stories total, and yet that one fic was so peak that it permanently burned itself into my memory. (Also, very Dust Sans-coded, which explains a lot.)

Now, I should clarify—before my husband, I never cared about physical appearances. Ever. What mattered to me was lore. Depth. The immaculate storytelling. That’s what made a character interesting. That’s what made me invested.

So who did I end up simping for?

…Ah.

First, it was Sans. And then—then the rabbit hole opened.

Cue my descent into Horror Sans and Dust Sans territory.

And let me tell you something: Horror Sans fanfics were a whole other breed.

Unrequited love? Check.

Soulmate AU with horror elements? Check.

Absolute emotional devastation? Check, check, and check.

And Dust Sans? Oh, Dust Sans was a different level of unhinged. Extremely mentally unstable. Psychopathic. A relentless killing machine consumed by his own broken psyche.

…And looking back at it now?

Yeah. That really should’ve told me something about my tastes.

I cry.

✦✧✦✧

Now that I really sit down and think about it...

Have I always been attracted to killers?

Because looking at my favorite horror tropes—the ones I actively enjoy writing—the pattern is very clear.

And yet, I never went through the typical killer-simp pipeline.

I never got into Creepypasta. Never had a FNAF phase. Sure, I know the lore (because obviously, who doesn’t at this point?), but the gameplay never interested me. And as for the mainstream horror icons—the ones everyone else was thirsting over? They didn’t do it for me.

But despite all that, somehow, I still ended up here.

And I never noticed.

Looking back now? It’s kind of hilarious.

It started small. A little intrigue here. A fascination there. Then came the red flags. And before I knew it, we were way past the point of concern.

We had gone full BLACK FLAG territory.

Blacker than pirate flags. Blacker than void itself.

The mental shift went from:

"Oh, he’s a little intense."

To:

"Okay, this guy’s got issues, but he’s interesting."

To:

"Aww, he wants to torture and murder me? That’s so sweet."

And that’s when I knew. There was no coming back.

But if you want to know the number one contributor to everything—every single twist, every turn, every single factor that solidified my fate—

It’s my husband.

And I am not opening that can of worms.

Ever.

All you need to know is that I have been cursed and corrupted by that cunning, possessive, terrifyingly loving man.

I love him.

Truly.

That’s all you need to know.

[comradekarin]

barbz are so fucking stupid it makes me sick. y’all doxxed, harassed and threatened a tik toker for being the one to TELL THE TRUTH about nicki, and use the sarcastic “so family is off limits” comment as if that’s cute? doing a fabulous read on nicki “cokehead” minaj defending and endorsing her rapist, pedophilic husband and brother and surrounding herself with violent men while simultaneously degrading women are the same as a sixteen year old saying her opinion online? the barbz getting other accounts banned/doxxed who speak out against her? leaking megan’s mother’s gravesite? making dehumanizing edits and disgracing megan’s character (and nicki liking and reposting these comments as well)? nicki minaj is a 41 year old grown ass multimillionaire woman, please stop excusing her childish and dangerous ass behavior because of how she grew up. even the insinuation that she doesn’t know any better because of her upbringing is also an extremely disgusting thing to say. her long ass incoherent rants on twitter are not “iconic”, it’s EMBARRASSING.

nicki loves to play villain and victim when it suits her. you’d think her defense of her husband and brother would be the line drawn for people, but it’s treated as something to bypass and ignore and “not consider as a fan of the music”. nicki is NOT your friend. she is NOT your family. parasocial relationships with celebrities who will never know you are dangerous. it’s one thing to be fan, it’s another to blindly follow, support, and justify anything your fav does. if you can excuse the disgusting actions of one, that means you have never stood for the principals and morals you claim to have. fuck, some of y’all must be doing lines with her cuz the amount of delusion, hate, and ignorance that so many barbz exude needs to be studied. do better.

[irrevocablecondition]

look, here's the thing. you can come online and you can say that you're protecting women. you can say that your vengance against trans people is some kind of feminist move, but that doesn't erase the fact that YOU are next. when trans people are gone and there is no one left to turn on, you will be next.

you come online and say you support the indefinite ban on puberty blockers in the UK, you come online and erase the fact that only 83 gender non-confirming (GNC) people were on them, that more cis people were on them. you start a war against hrt, about minors taking hormonal medication and we'll watch as america starts clamping down on contraceptives. you cry about the 83 GNC people that were on puberty blockers, but you'll later be worrying about the 58% of 16-17 year olds afab that are on some variation of hrt themselves. you come online and cry about hrt, ignoring the fact that the pill is hrt. it just doesn't have the word trans infront of it.

you come online and blow up a trans persons comment sections. you cry about the fact a trans man is wearing makeup or that a trans woman hasn't shaved. you come online and pinpoint all the ways that we aren't doing "enough", and you erase the decades long fight against gender norms. you say a trans woman isn't trying hard enough when she doesn't have a full face on, and you'll watch as YOU start not being enough. you watch as the gender norms we fought against for so long start coming back into play, where women are told they aren't doing enough and those with PCOS or any other hormonal imbalance watch as you ridicule a trans woman for having hair and therefore not being a woman. you'll watch as you, with your hair not done, your makeup not on, and your legs unshaven start becoming a debate about womanhood and what it really means.

you come online and cry about the fact trans people are "mutilating" themselves with top surgery. you say we rush into this surgery with too little thought, and you watch as a 16 year old online gets a rhinoplasty. you watch as an 18 year old gets filler, as people get boob jobs done and that's okay. that's fine. because your issue was never "if you're unhappy with your body, get therapy", you issue was that it was Trans. you say that trans hrt should start at 25 despite it being mostly reversible (bar bottom growth and voice on T) and you'll let people sign up to the army at 18. you'll let people fight for their country before you'll let them have bodily autonomy. you'll say gender-affirming care is disgusting and ignore the fact that every time you get your hair done, your nails done, lip filler, botox, boob jobs, etc etc - THAT is gender affirming. and you'll watch as the media starts dissecting celebrities appearances and questioning what they've had done.

and you won't be protected even if you're an olympian. even if you're successful.

you say you're protecting women when you talk about single-sex spaces and you listen to the government say that we, trans people, are the issue. you listened to Sunak talk about how trans people are nothing but sexual assaulters and ignored the fact that over 50 MPs of his party, the ones that were making these laws to "protect women", had sexual assault allegations. you'll say that people are pretending to be women to get into your spaces, and you ignore the key word - pretending. not trans people. cis. men.

and you'll listen to those men make the laws. the anti-trans laws, btw. none that are woman-centric, no. just anti-trans laws with a "for women" sticker put on top to hide the fact that they've done nothing beyond that to actually protect women.

you say you're "protecting kids" and you ignore as the suicide rates peak, how LGBTQ+ helplines reached record high call numbers the night of the election. you're "protecting families" and ignore the 1 in 4 trans people that experience homelessness in their lifetime, and the 1 in 2 that are domestically abused. you say you're "protecting women" when you talk about bathrooms and you ignore the fact that 1 in 2 trans people are sexually assaulted, and 10% of those that report are then assaulted AGAIN by the officers meant to help them. and then you'll go online and cry about trans officers.

you'll talk about the "them" and the "us", and you ignore the fact that when you start reducing gender down to an ideal woman or an ideal man, YOU lose too.

you ignore the fact that you are just as at risk, and you will be next. and it's already happening.

and i think the difference is, the really big key difference, is that trans people are going to have your back regardless. trans people will fight alongside you just like they did at stonewall, GNC people will fight alongside you just like they did during the suffragette movement, a movement that fought against the same ideals you are perpetuating all over again.

trans people are going to have your back because whilst you focus on the "trans" part, we focus on the "people". because that's what we are. people.

and i think you're a piece of shit if you use women's rights as a guise for your transphobia whilst perpetuating ideals that have harmed you, are currently harming you, and will continue to harm you, unless you realise the only "them" versus "us" you need to worry about is everyone versus the government.

[dailyfigures]

Unpopular opinion: I hate hate HATE loli figures. idc if people collect them because they’re ‘cute’ it’s still weird asf imo, there are so many other and much cuter figures. It disgusts me how popular and normalized they are among the anime community.

strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

oh god anon allow me to specifically rant about one of my worst pet peeves. i used to see this mostly on tiktok when i still had the app, but i've seen it happen on most social media.

it really grinds my gears when people own a suggestive/nsfw figure of a minor, and then accuse anyone who dares to say something about it of sexualising children. if you want to own figures of a child/teenager in lingerie, i'm really not a fan of that but at least own up to it. don't act like everyone else is weird when you own a figure made with a certain intention and refuse to admit it.

maybe it helps to give an example; i saw someone on tiktok own a figure of ram from re:zero in lingerie, on hands and knees with an arched back. i think ram is 17 and later in the series an adult, arguebly not the worst figure ever but i can imagine people finding it a little weird. op started accusing everyone who made a comment about the figure by pulling an uno reverse and going "wow....how deeply SICK of YOU to see a child and make it sexual....i would NEVER see her like that.....". ok good for you but i can assure you that was the intention the figure was made with, the target audience is adult men and it's strange to deny this. they even claimed that it was fine because "everyone who collects ram is sapphic anyway" i can assure you that is not true 😭😭 this is very much a case of being in your little online gay bubble and thinking the whole world is the same as you. the target audience of all (female) suggestive/nsfw figures is simply straight men. i'm not saying it's the only people who can own them, but it is who the companies have in mind when producing the figures and it is the largest part of the market. it reminds me a bit of when kpop stans think only gay 17 year olds stan their favourite girl group and then you watch a perfomance where the crowd cheering isn't filtered out and it's all 40 year old men. i'm not stoked about it either, but it is simply the truth.

ofcourse i've seen people reaching, it does happen on tiktok that people get overly sensitive/woke/whatever and blindly hate anyone who collects normal nsfw figures or anyone else who didn't do anything wrong. not every tiktok comment section is filled with the brightest minds of our generation (shocker, i know). i do however think it's a common thing, even with real life children, where people try to question something inappropriate and somehow get the blame. i saw this happen when mothers thought it was strange that target sells swimsuits for babies/toddlers with hip cut outs, and then people accusing said moms of being the weird ones for "thinking a children's swim suit is sexual". guys am i losing my mind. am i going crazy. the concerned mothers are not the problem here for pointing out a weird thing. why in god's name were the swim suits designed like that. can we get an ounce of critical thinking in the chat.

AND ANOTHER THING! sorry guys this is like 5 years of built up irritation you have to let me go for a moment. anyway LOOK at this same shit i saw yesterday. i will not share the video but it was a video of very young middle school girls wearing heavy (gyaru?) makeup, fashion, wigs and nails which was honestly already a bit baffling because it was so much on such young kids. they were all wearing that fashion trend where you wear low rise pants/skirt and then pull up your thong strings to the high heavens so they're on your hips and sticking out off your pants/skirt. not a trend i usually mind but these were very young girls and the whole look, the visible underwear especially, was very inappropriate for their age so people in the comments were uncomfortable. i took one single peak at the comments and had to leave for my own sanity. you guys cannot be serious.

and let me get this very clear: i have also seen people sexualise children doing normal things many times. both extremes are a problem. i think it's fucking weird to sexualise a child giving their parents a kiss or telling a child they shouldn't wear their bathing suit around their male family members, etc. however it is ALSO fucking weird for children to do/wear things that were specifically made for adults doing adult things (like wearing visible lacy thongs when you're in middle school) and no adult stepping in for the child's own safety. both things are weird and i hope everyone dies. anyway what were you saying anon? ah right, no i don't like loli figures either. not a fan.

send me your unpopular figure opinions