#and that was only because you all had left me nice comments on Tumblr that I couldn't ignore

[deepseawave]

obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog

Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️

Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D

[espithewarlock]

Sorry, I have anxiety and can't relate 💅

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ao3 writers staring at their inboxes 0.2 seconds after posting a new fic

[byunpum]

Scent

Pair: Tsu'tey x Human Reader ( jake human sister )

Warning: A little spicy, tsu'tey (in my opinion) being curious.

Note: Me posting something, knowing I've ignored my tumblr for months. Bye~!

After the war, life for tsu'tey had been very quiet. Everything was back to normal, well almost everything. A large number of humans decided to settle in Pandora and close to the clan. The idea of having humans among the clan was not pleasant to him, for him they were a bit unpleasant. They were strange, everything they did was strange to him. And the most disturbing thing to him was the scent the humans gave off. The Na'vi had a highly developed sense of smell and the strange scent of humans was not pleasant for him. They always tried to use some scents to disguise their scent of origin, according to Jake it was “perfumes and soaps”. Tsu'tey didn't think it was cool to use those things. But there was one scent which had caught all his attention. And the owner of that scent came from you.

The first time tsu'tey registered your scent, was when he happened to pass by jake's side. He was talking to one of those humans. But as soon as he walked by you, he stopped dead in his tracks. The scent he was smelling was something… amazing. He felt a shiver run down his spine, he couldn't understand where the smell was coming from. It wasn't until jake tapped him on the shoulder, and introduced them. Tsu'tey turns to look at you. You smiled warmly back at him, giving him the 'I see you' sign. Tsu'tey caught on a little too late, he was so immersed in the scent you were giving off that he barely listened to what Jake was saying. He couldn't believe that you were the carrier of that peculiar scent. From that day on, tsu'tey did everything he could to be by your side.

It got to the point that he didn't care about the comments they made, it was strange to see a man like tsu'tey behind a human. Always trying to help you, or try to talk to you even for a couple of seconds, he had to smell your scent at least once a day. He was becoming obsessed, and if his little obsession was not dying down. He began to notice how your scent became stronger when he was around you. It had to be that reason, because on one of the occasions he came to talk to you. You were talking to neytiri, and he could feel how your scent was the usual one. But as soon as neytiri left you alone, he could feel it getting more and more potent. He was going crazy and he knew it. It wasn't healthy, what he was creating for you. You were supposed to be a human, he wouldn't have to find you attractive or desirable…but here he is. If you asked him to kiss your feet he would do it, even if you asked him to kill someone and let him put his nose in your neck sweet spot for only 5 minutes or less, he would do it.

On the other hand, you were oblivious to this situation. You thought tsu'tey was very kind and gentlemanly. He was always helping you, and available to you. You liked the attention he gave you. Besides…tsu'tey was painfully handsome. You liked him from head to toe, you found him beautiful. And having him this close wasn't helping you much. But you enjoyed his company…there was just a nice friendship between the two of you.

That particular day, tsu'tey could smell your scent from far away, he could tell you were about 30 feet away from him. And he could recognize it was you, turning around to see you approaching him with a basket in your hands. “Hello!!!” you greet him, smiling at him. You were hurting his senses, because if it were up to him he would have already dragged you into his arms. You looked very pretty, in the traditional na'vi clothing. Tsu'tey scanned you up and down, laughing a little. “Do you like it? Neytiri gave me this outfit…she made it for me” you speak, taking a quick turn. “I'm surprised at how well it suits you “tsu'tey says, looking at you again. But now with more determination, the little clothing gave freedom to your scent to be released all over the place, he was getting nervous. “Yeah…she says I should wear more family stuff…you know, since jake is my brother and he is now…” you stop talking, when you notice that the man is barely paying attention to you. “Tsu'tey…are you okay?” you ask, waving your hand in his face. Snapping tsu'tey out of his stasis. He laughs nervously, settling more on his feet. “Yes, sorry. You were saying?” tsu'tey sees you laugh.

“I was going to ask you if you could help me pick some berries…the ones near the river. You know they're a little tall…and I need help” you speak, tsu'tey doesn't think for a second and goes to help you. Getting up from the ground, he starts walking towards the river. The walk from the village to the river was about 15 minutes. When you arrived you both decided that the best thing to do was to pick the berries that were on top of some branches, besides it was much more private for you. Your very presence in the clan could be a bit intimidating for some na'vi. And this was an area where they used to come frequently. Tsu'tey helped you up, placing his hands on your waist, to get you up easily. But not before bringing his face close to your back, sniffing you. Closing his eyes, enjoying your scent. It was a momentary thing, when you climb up the branch. “Are you coming?” you keep walking towards where the berries were. “Yes…I'm coming” tsu'tey swallows hard, trying to control himself.

Tsu'tey helps you for a while, picking the prettiest berries that were on the highest leaves. Sitting down to rest, and to watch you pick in the other corner. You turn and give him a smile. Tsu'tey smiles back. Aside from the fact that the man was obsessed with your essence, he liked the way you were. You were the opposite of your brother. You were calm and quiet. You didn't do risky things and avoided getting into trouble. Tsu'tey enjoyed your company, and he was sure you did too. He could feel it. “These berries are so sweet” you speak, approaching where tsu'tey was sitting. “Yes…and this is their best season” tsu'tey speaks, but is puzzled when you sit down in front of him. You sit in front of him, cross-legged. This new position makes your scent much stronger than at other times. Freezing in his seat, his eyes widen.

However, you keep talking as if nothing is wrong. You are placing the basket next to you, taking some berries to clean them. You can tell, you were the only one talking, tsu'tey might be silent, but he wasn't talking at all. You look up and you can see that he was different. He was looking at you seriously, his pupils were dilated, his posture was straight, his ears were up and so was his tail. You could notice that his breathing was agitated, and although his look seemed to be one of discomfort… you knew it was not. It was one more of lust, you could see how he was swallowing hard. “Tsu'tey?” you speak softly, getting her attention.

“What's wrong with you? Are you ok?” you ask, tsu'tey doesn't answer you, and keeps looking at you. Analyzing your whole body, your scent was ambushing him. It was too strong for him, too sweet. And now with your new outfit you were not helping him. “Why do you smell like that?” says tsu'tey in a serious tone. You grow more nervous, closing your legs out of instinct. The look on tsu'tey's face at this moment was intimidating, but not in the bad way. “I have a bad smell?” you begin to smell your hand, as you watch tsu'tey approach you. Placing his hands on the ground of the branch, leaning a little over you. To now be much closer to you. “Don't do it” tsu'tey places his hand on your knee, moving it to the side. Causing your legs to spread for him. You watch as he closes his eyes, and sighs deeply. Your heart wanted to pound out of your chest, he was getting so much closer to you. “You have a scent…delicious” tsu'tey moves over your body, getting closer to your neck. Pressing his nose to your neck, breathing deeply. Words didn't come out of your mouth, you were surprised tsu'tey didn't use to behave like this with you. Well with anyone…and now he was almost on top of you. Balancing on his hands, sniffing your neck.

Tsu'tey felt so out of control, it was like he couldn't control what he was doing. He was feeling anxious, he wanted to know where that scent that was driving him crazy was coming from. Slowly moving down as he sniffed your skin, down your chest until he reached your breasts. Breathing hard again, to continue, the only thing you could do was to stay still. -T-tsu” your voice is interrupted when you see that tsu'tey had already reached your lower belly, stopping for a moment. At this moment tsu'tey was crouched over you, very close to his goal. He gave you a quick glance, and if you had to be realistic his look was one of hunger. As if no one could stop him, though you didn't plan to. Tsu'tey wouldn't get that far, would he. It was then, when he decided to go a little lower. First you thought he was going to smell one of your thighs. But you were wrong, when he went down he parked his face completely in your clothed cunt.

...

...

Your eyes widen in surprise, as you feel him breathing much harder than before. In a quick movement you move your foot towards tsu'tey's face and kick him in the face. This makes him move away. “What the hell is wrong with you?” you yell at him, this is all taking you by surprise. You liked tsu'tey but no one has ever behaved like this before. “What's wrong? I'm just sniffing you” speaks tsu'tey caressing his face a little bit. “What for? And why are you sniffing me…there” you close your legs slowly, but you see how tsu'tey stops you. “Don't close your legs…this is where that rich smell is coming from” tsu'tey says, laughing playfully. “Oh my god, no no” you close your legs tightly. “You're talking about the smell of my parts?” you were more concerned now. “I'm talking about your whole scent, I've never smelled someone with this scent before. No na'vi woman has a scent like this…it's exciting” tsu'tey speaks a little excited. You had never seen him like this, he looked like someone else. He was still very close to you, now he had come completely over you. You were looking up, observing his whole body attitude.

“I have noticed that when I am close to you…or when I touch you” tsu'tey lowers his voice, raising his hand to now touch your thigh, caressing your exposed skin a little. “I can notice how the smell gets stronger…and I love that” tsu'tey lowers his face, moving closer to your face. You push him back, causing tsu'tey to sit back down. You were so embarrassed, tsu'tey was talking about the excitement you felt towards him, like it was nothing. You wanted to bury yourself alive, you were getting so nervous, you didn't know what to say or do to him. “Tsu'tey…but you must not approach him like that. You must ask” you looked down, tsu'tey was looking at you playfully. He is silent for a moment, seeing how you are a little nervous. Squeezing your legs together so nothing would come out. “So…could I smell you a little? “tsu'tey asks. You knew that the attitude tsutey was showing was something without mischief, something he wasn't doing on purpose. It was instinctive on his part.

“I don't know what to tell you…we barely know each other, and yes I really like you” you try to change what you just said but there was a lot going on right now. “I mean…we should wait, yeah?you know what I mean?” you try to make him understand you, it's not like you didn't want tsu'tey between your legs. But it was still too early for that. “Ok… but can I be closer to you?” asks tsu'tey again. You nod with your face, watching as he moves closer to now be literally glued next to you. His tail began to dig into your waist, and he kept looking at you.

Oh my gosh…where have you gotten to. You had to explain to tsu'tey that personal space in humans is much more important than he thinks.

[scriptseekstories]

Thou Art With Child?!

Chapter 4- Crumble Showdown

A/N: Does the Ao3 curse apply to Tumblr too 😭 I had fallen sick and basically died for days, only commenting on asks that were keeping me going fr.

But I’m back! Still dying but don’t worry I’m taking care of myself, I just needed to finish this or else I would go crazy.

The days passing seemed to last forever. You never actually thought you would live like this, taking care of a baby with a stranger who freed you from amber, but you weren’t complaining.

It was actually nice to wander the forest again, though only stopping around the borders you made a spell for yourself around your home. Always standing at the edge of the snowy environment and your warm weathered border, your dough not built for the weather change.

It seemed that the snow that seemed to form all those years ago was getting harsher, which caused animals to migrate over to your warmth. Blueberry birds to jelly mice, you didn’t mind sharing your luscious temperature with them.

You petted a jelly deer that flicked its ears and nuzzled against your palm, making you smile at how cute it was. Rustling from the trees made you look up to see blueberry birds flocking about while you wandered.

“Chirp!! My fair (Name) cookie!” One blueberry bird happily cheeped out, “It’s a pleasure to see you out of your stone! Chirp!!” You looked up in surprise at the animal, not because of it speaking but because of what it said.

“You’ve been watching me?” You asked curiously, plucking berries from a few bushes and even allowing some jelly deer to eat from your hand.

“My generation of blueberry birds have been watching over you, chirp!! You were an anomaly in the forest, so we couldn’t help but watch as the forest protected you in its grass and dirt! Chirp!!” It explained, feather ruffling while watching you trying to find good berries to make for dinner.

“Now that I think about it after all this time, I’ve been frozen for 150 years,” You don’t really want to think about it too much to avoid the existential crisis of the fact you outlived cookies you once knew and the way your memories are still fresh as if the your friends left a week ago.

“Who knows how the world changed? How many kingdoms had advanced? How much am I to learn about new magic?” If there was new magic, maybe it’s time to finally find a good home to raise Doughy in a place protected by magic wielding cookies.

“It would be fun to see you explore our new world! Chirp!!” The blueberry bird flew off while you were left with the thoughts of actually leaving. It was right, the world is new to you now, who knows what could be in store!

“Maybe I should finally… leave my home. I could explore the whole Earthbread,” You grinned excitedly, “Yeah, to show Doughy all the rich cultures and homes of cookiekind!” You now held a new determination in your heart. You had to move on! Nothing else will make you say otherwise!

“A-and for me to learn new magic from across the land! Yes, to see new cookies! And have Affogato to-!” You stopped yourself at the mention of your new housemate.

Affogato cookie… the past week or so he hasn’t harm you or Doughy, but that doesn’t mean you were oblivious to his intent in his eyes. He had been lighting little scent sticks around the house, sugary caffeine scent filled your house that made you feel… safe.

But maybe that’s why he looked so ruffled when you first met him… maybe he changed from who he once was, whoever he was that caused him to flee his home.

“I can’t,” You shook your head, “I know a bad cookie when I see one, and a few moments of drinking doesn’t make me see him in a new light,” But how you wished for him to be good, so you could feel like you could trust another once more.

“Besides… I don’t I can let myself be vulnerable again,” The problem of being frozen in time was the fact your emotions were still fresh and your emotional wounds still tender.

Your decision of Affogato cookie has been tilting to a good light. You shouldn’t think so lowly of a cookie just because of vibes alone. Maybe… just maybe, he could be a cookie you’ll have a close relationship with.

“I simply hope I made the right decision in leaving him with Doughy while I’m gone to pick berries,”

꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂ ꧁꧂ ꧁꧂ ꧁꧂ ꧁

The Fellowship of Cookies were really considering in leaving Smoked Cheese cookie behind with all his whining. Endless complaints of traveling with them, but not daring to leave on his own after the suggestion from Black Raisin cookie.

“Along the borders of the kingdom is was where Olive cookie claimed to calculate where the chunks of amber was,” Caramel Arrow cookie stated at the map in confusion, Wildberry cookie humming before using his gauntlet to move branches away for others to pass through.

“How long is this going to take?!” Smoked Cheese cookie loudly complained, dragging his staff behind him as if he was forced to carry anything. He had better fates back at the Golden Cheese Kingdom after treason than walking endlessly.

“If you ask that one more time, I’m going to stuff your mouth full of raisin crows!” Black Raisin shouted back, tossing her head back and glared at him. Smoked Cheese cookie scoffed and argued with her, the shouting making the others more tired.

“Both of you are so loud!!” Crunchy Chip cookie barked at them, turning around while walking backwards.

“Ohoh, WE are loud?!” Smoked Cheese cookie said incredulously, as if what the warrior’s hypocritical words personally offended him.

“Stay out of this, puppy,” Black Raisin remarked, to which made Crunchy Chip cookie stop in his tracks and gasped loudly.

“PUPPY?!” The three began to argue together, close to each other’s throats while the other two cookies looked over their shoulders and sighed in disbelief at what was happening behind them.

“Maybe it was a bad idea to join together and search for this magical source,” Caramel Arrow cookie mumbled, watching the three other cookies snap at one another more and more. Wildberry only hummed in agreement, used to this type of banter from his queen and the Greenish Red Dragon.

Suddenly, all three cookies stopped arguing when they ran into the hard back of Wildberry cookie, who stopped in his tracks while Caramel Arrow cookie looked around in awe.

“Over there, a cottage in the distance,” He said, pointing through a clear opening, where sunlight perfectly aligned on a beautiful yet simple cottage, with even a small water mill flowing from a channel of water down under.

“Strange, it’s between the borders of the Hollyberry and Dark Cacao Kingdoms, yet I never seen it before,” She mumbled, “Especially this sudden weather change,” From here the cookies could see a clear border of snow and grass, as if someone cleared out a large circle of snow.

“Something I’ve never seen before,” Black Raisin cookie hummed, flinching when a flock of blueberry birds flew above them, as if they were seeking shelter from the cold and went to the warm weather.

“Magic has been used definitely, the magical source is near,” Crunchy Chip huffed, letting go of Smoke Cheese’s neck who was gasping for air while they all crouched down and silently snuck around the premises.

“Great, let’s seek and leave,” Smoked Cheese cookie rasped out, soothing his throat and clearing it while already silently planning to blast Crunchy Chip cookie into Beast-Yeast.

Inside the cottage, remained Affogato cookie reluctantly watching over Doughy. He had agreed to stay behind as he was not fond of warm weathered insects either, shivering at the memory where he spotted a jelly centipede on his leg.

Hovering over a candle, he nodded in approval at his incense being lit, smoke filling the house once more. While doing so he passed a mirror, where he was proud at still looking grand despite the change of clothes.

He was grieving over the loss of his old royal advisor clothes, but something about his simple traditional coffee tribe clothes, reminds him of his village… where he never fit in, not there, not in the Black Citadel, not anywhere in the world. Not anywhere but here… with you.

“There,” Affogato cookie smirked while gently fixing the spot he held his little scent stick on the table. You hadn’t complained about them yet, in fact you looked almost content whenever he lights one.

It’s adorable how strong, yet clueless you are, Affogato cookie believes. He suddenly felt a stare from behind, turning around to see Doughy crawling on the couch, little innocent eyes staring at him curiously.

“Oh don’t give me that look, it’s for the best interest of your future and the control of the Dark Cacao Kingdom,” He scoffed, cautiously picking the little blob of dough in his arms as if he was carrying a bomb.

“But alas, it was as quite easy to poison the mind of the old king, your parent had been a challenge,” He hummed, setting Doughy snuggly into the high chair, walking to the counter to mash up jellies in a bowl.

“Always too headstrong to succumb to my charms~” He smirked, “For someone who has been isolating themselves for years only to be trapped within amber for two centuries, (Name) cookie is quite a strong, witted, beautiful, crispy… very crispy…” He trailed off, remembering the time you were teaching him to grow carrots, how you merely wore a top to ensure the sun, his jaw on the floor seeing your dough… crispy… smooth… touchable-

“AHEM-!” Affogato cookie cleared his throat loudly while turning around with the bowl in his hands, only to see the high chair empty. He swore he heard his heart drop to the floor, and already pictured his funeral.

“Where did you go?!” Affogato dropped the bowl and frantically looked around, his head snapping to the open door and little Doughy waddling outside to inspect the flower beds.

He raced outside and quickly picked up the baby dough, who giggled and gurgled at the sight of Affogato cookie’s relieved expression.

"Ugh, why must my darling leave me with you?" He reeled back when a tiny drooled over hand almost touched his face, holding his arms out to keep Doughy at bay.

"You are merely a pile of soft baked dough, how could any cookie be admired and wish for more of you simpletons?" He scrunched his face up, wondering how you didn’t go crazy from how much trouble this little dough has been.

"Bawawawah!" Doughy babbled, little arm stubs flailing about and giggled, little droopy eyes staring into Affogato cookie’s own.

"Well... I do admit you are pleasant to care for..." He scoffed, but felt his lips curl ever so slightly when Doughy gave a dopey smile.

From the branches and leaves, hid the Fellowship of Cookies after so long of searching, staring down at the cookie who had his back towards them, unaware of their presence while he ranted to Doughy as if they could understand him.

“Ugh… should’ve known a traitor like him was involved in something such as this,” Crunchy Chip groaned, remembering the last time he encountered the exiled cookie, the way his anger washes over him whenever he even heard the name being uttered.

“Who is he?” Black Raisin cookie wondered after seeing the Dark Cacao warriors hold a disgusted and angry look on their faces.

“Affogato cookie, a slimy and venomous snake who almost killed King Dark Cacao cookie and attempted to take over our kingdom,” Caramel Arrow cookie hissed out, rage bubbling in her throat. Of course he wasn’t done causing more trouble after fleeing like a coward.

“He attacked the Crème Republic alongside the Cookies of Darkness a while back,” Wildberry cookie added in, closing his eyes and nodding slightly as if experiencing the memories again.

“Heh… like you,” Black Raisin cookie slightly grinned and turned to Smoked Cheese cookie, who gritted his teeth and glared at the cookie, knowing he should’ve not explained why Golden Cheese cookie had blackmail on him.

“Yes, we get it, I failed,” He sarcastically whispered, “Can we just see whether or not he has this magical source so we could return?” They quickly hushed up when Affogato cookie turned around, making them see what he was holding and ranting to.

"Once I get my revenge on the Dark Cacao Kingdom, I will rule amongst all cookie kind!" Affogato cookie chuckle deeply, "And you, my first follower, will submit to me!" He raised Doughy higher in the air, spinning them around with a grin.

"Afafa!" Doughy giggled, causing Affogato cookie’s eyes widen ever so slightly before letting out his evil laughter. His heart swooned! Or maybe, it was just because of the fact his soon-to-be-follower’s babbles almost sounded coherent. That’s right, it must be it!

Certain cookies don’t take this scene very fondly.

“Where’d did he get that baby?” Black Raisin cookie whispered, eyes narrowing at Affogato cookie’s words, especially the words aimed towards that baby dough.

“He must’ve KIDNAPPED them!” Crunchy Chip cookie snarled, already ready to whistle for his crème wolves to come to his aid and attack that snake of a cookie.

“Should we really jump in right now? I thought you watchers form plans,” Smoked Cheese cookie rolled his eyes, “If he managed to take over an entire kingdom, then I suggest we do not barge in and expect things to go well just because we outnumber him,” He explained while watching the unaware cookie laughing.

“Smoked Cheese cookie is correct, we must form a plan as to not harm innocent civilians such as that baby,” Wildberry cookie suggested, sensing Crunchy Chip and Caramel Arrow cookie’s urge to attack immediately.

"I cannot simply sit here and watch that snake turn that baby dough into his subject!" Caramel Arrow cookie whispered, gripping her blades as if it was preventing her from attacking.

Just then, Affogato’s grin slowly faltered, now staying still in an eerie silence, his grip on Doughy tightened ever so slightly that didn’t cause the baby pain, but showed the way he was acting.

"I know you're out there..." Affogato cookie turned his head ever so slightly, his sharp catlike eyes piercing into the dark woods. It’s not his first time surviving in the woods.

"SUBMIT!!" He shouted as he lunged for his staff, before shooting a wave of poison into the distance. Immediately, various cookies jumped out of hiding, sliding onto the dirt and surrounding Affogato cookie.

“You think that you willing to dress in commoner’s clothing can disguise you from the vile acts you did?” Caramel Arrow cookie reeled her arm back to draw an arrow at Affogato cookie who rolled his eyes from her words.

"Well well well, I should've known you can't stand to see me be happy, Caramel Arrow cookie!!" He huffed, holding onto Doughy tightly in one arm while clutching his staff in the other and pointed at the group of cookies.

"Stand down Affogato cookie!! Don’t make me have to shoot!” Caramel Arrow cookie demanded while reeling her arm back to draw her arrow. She knew her mistakes last encounter, and she was sure she wasn’t going to miss this time.

"Give that baby over to us and surrender," Wildberry cookie firmly commanded, his gauntlet hand reaching out in open palm. Doughy giggled and obliviously clapped in happiness.

"Hmph! As if I would listen to a Hollyberrian," Affogato cookie hissed back, eyes fixated on every movement the cookies made behind him in case he gets jumped from behind.

"Watch it, bub! Or else!” Crunchy Chip cookie barked, his metal claws glistening against the sunlight beams shining through the trees.

“You have exactly five seconds to lower your staff, now!” Black Raisin crouched in a fighting stance, one of her raisin crows perched on her head while it squawked loudly.

“Trust me, Affogato cookie, I assure it it'll be more bearable listening to these cookie than argue," Smoked Cheese cookie grumbled, pointing his staff at the exiled cookie.

Affogato knew he should’ve started lighting his incense sooner, now he had to deal with these simpletons taking away his ticket to power, the throne, his happiness!! You won’t be leaving him anytime soon, even if he has to smite any other cookies in his way.

“You will not take what I have anymore!!” Affogato cookie sucked in through his gritted teeth, “I will NEVER give up my precious happiness!!” Pushing Doughy’s head into his chest, he swung his staff to release a poisonous gas to immobilize the cookies.

“Hmmm, my sand storm is more effective!” Smoked Cheese cookie smirked and slammed his own staff into the ground, releasing a wave of sandy wind to counter the poison gas. Black Raisin cookie and Caramel Arrow cookie used the counterattack to hide in the sand storm and run on both sides of Affogato cookie.

“Charging head on with a baby in my arms? How honorable!” Affogato cookie could only managed to barely jump away to avoid the sharp blades from the two, before getting leg swiped from behind by Crunchy Chip.

“Bawa! Afafa?” Doughy whined from the harsh movements, getting fussy and crying. Affogato gritted his teeth before trapping Crunchy Chip’s fist when he tried to strike him with his staff, and using what strength he had to throw him.

“Grk! Go get him, big guy!!” Crunchy Chip shouted in pain as Wildberry clanged his gauntlet, charging head on. Affogato cookie quickly set Doughy down behind him, giving the baby one last look of sorrow before scowling and turning back at the cookies.

“Strike me down!!” Inside he was terrified, he wasn’t a fighter, but he’ll be damned if his weeks of spending time with you ends like this. Failed to protect your home, to protect his- his… baby.

His hands trembled around his staff, realization was he over him. His plans, his intentions, his actions were all simply denial of what his heart truly wanted. A place in the world, and it was with you. Oh crumbs…

He was-!!

CLANG

Affogato cookie kept his eyes shut when he heard scraping of metal and rock. His eyes opened to see you standing over him, arms out casting a shield made of amber that strained against Wildberry cookie’s gauntlet.

“Darling-!” He gasped out before you managed to real on one arm back, fist clenched while more amber encased to make your own giant gauntlet before launching a big punch at Wildberry cookie.

“What the Oven?!” Smoked Cheese cookie yelped and dodged when Wildberry cookie slid back with a pained grunt. Dust was settling before them to witness you, your hands glowing and pulsing with magic, eyes fixated on these attackers.

“Take Doughy inside,” You simply said, “Now,” Before turning your head back to face these intruders. Affogato cookie obeyed quickly, grabbing his staff and bounced Doughy to his chest while fleeing inside, your baby crying out and reaching for you while you stood behind.

“Every single cookie will stand down now, or I won’t fight fair!!” You shouted in your best authoritative tone, but nervousness still resided inside, not knowing how strong cookies got over the years, magic or not.

Black Raisin cookie grunted and attempted to charge, but was stopped when a shaking arm lifted in front of her. That was when she realized that the others were frozen, to what it seemed to be in shock. She looked at you closely, her own eyes widening.

“Is that…?” Wildberry cookie lowered his gauntlet, watching you like you were some sort of being of fabled nature, a fairytale come true.

“No way…” For once, there were no words uttered by Crunchy Chip cookie, his eyes twinkling in awe, dropping his metal claws.

“Marvelous indeed…” Smoked Cheese cookie swallowed hard, instinctively bowing his head down as if in shame from his earlier actions.

“(Name) cookie,” What happened next completely changed your attitude from rage to bafflement. Caramel Arrow cookie suddenly fell onto one knee, bowing her head down in some sort of respect.

You took a step back when the other cookies did the same. Wildberry, Crunchy Chip, Black Raisin, and even Smoked Cheese cookie all needed in front of you and lowered their heads. You looked to the side before looking back at them.

“Um… w-why are you bowing?” All of your anger has been caught off guard, thrown out to be replaced by confusion and slight embarrassment seeing these cookie kneeling as if you were someone important. As if they knew you.

“How could we not?” Caramel Arrow cookie lifted her head up with starry eyes, “Years of passing your stories, your portraits, your songs!” She quickly lowered her head back down, as if she was unworthy of looking at you.

“My… what?” You were confused, eyes shifting to the side, staring at your house before looking back at them. Affogato words from that night… how kingdoms knew your lullaby… what more do they know?

“Their majesties were fools to keep our target’s real identity a secret, but I won’t lie and say I’m disappointed,” Smoked Cheese cookie whispered to the others, finally standing up and giving you some sort of nod of approval.

“Indeed, we must return with them,” Nodding in agreement, Wildberry cookie still kneeled down in respect of your presence

“Looks like they won’t exactly agree to this, especially if that snake scum is with them,” Crunchy Chip scowled at the thought of Affogato cookie digging his fangs into your innocent nature, or at least that’s what he thought of you.

“Yeah, who knows what that cookie did to lie his way in their protection,” Black Raisin may not know fully on who Affogato cookie is, but the fact he managed to take down Dark Cacao cookie by poisonous words and spells, she was going to make sure he doesn’t walk.

“(Name) cookie! Please hear us out! Our kings and queens have ordered us to track a magic source down, and we concluded that it’s you!” Caramel Arrow cookie quickly scrambled to stand up, a big smile on her face full of excitement.

“Magical source?” Kings and Queens? They must be the new heirs to the kingdoms that once belonged to your friends, “Yeah! You made a giant ass explosion that shot magic light into the air! Surely you remembered!” Crunchy Chip cookie clenched his fists and pumped them in the air with a fierce grin.

“We mean you no harm, however we must return back to the kingdom,” Black Raisin cookie urged, knowing they’ve been gone for a few days and assumed the Ancients would be concerned as to what, or who, they’re finding.

“I-I’m flattered by how you seem to respect me even if I don’t know why, but I need to know why you were attacking in the first place,” You cleared your throat, “Especially at my baby,” Despite being flattered, your anger returned and you were already off to a rough start with these cookies.

“Of course! That snake, Affogato cookie, he-!!” Before Caramel Arrow cookie could finish, she suddenly jumped back when a blob of poison flew straight between you and her, hitting a tree while it sizzled.

You quickly jumped back too, just as when Affogato cookie finally returned from hiding Doughy inside the house. He stood in front of you, pointing his staff towards the cookies who were now in fighting stances again.

“I advise you to not listen to what they claim to be the truth!” He huffed loudly, “They have been nothing but keep on destroying all the hard work I ever created to make my place in this world!” You really didn’t want to fight at all, but these cookies seemed so sure of what they’re saying.

“You stay away from them, scum!! What poison did you infect their head with?!” Crunchy Chip shouted in fury, scooping up his claws and urged the others to point their weapons back at Affogato cookie.

“Hey now, we don’t need to fight. Let’s just calm down and-ACK!!” You were cut off when Affogato cookie pushed you down and slammed his staff into the ground to release gas of sweet scented purple poison.

“Come now, darling. We must flee,” He pushed a cloth over your mouth to allow you to breathe, but your eyes caught something shiny coming towards you. You shoved him away where you both barely avoided Crunchy Chip cookie’s pounce.

You casted nature magic, the earth around you forming wall barriers between Affogato and the other cookies, seeing as they’re no longer wish to attack you but your housemate. The ground lifted into various sizes of pillars, having the cookies to jump and avoid attacks from Affogato cookie.

“Hmm…” Affogato cookie smirked at the realization of those simpletons avoiding you from their attacks, amused by his plan forming. Just as you created another wall of amber, you let out a surprised yelp when your hand was grabbed and was pulled into the arms of Affogato.

“A-Affogato cookie?! What are you-?!” You felt your heart beat faster, “Just like when we would drink~” He winked at you, before dipping you where an arrow was narrowly inches away from his head. Emotions you haven’t felt for a while flooded back, and you felt like your old self dancing with the Heroes of Earthbread.

“What the?!” Black Raisin cookie was dumbfounded after jumping off a pillar you created, watching Affogato cookie spin you around when an attack from Smoked Cheese cookie was casted.

Wildberry cookie and Crunchy Chip went on both sides and charged to peel you away from him, but the caffeine cookie simply smirked and pulled the two of you toe to toe, where Wildberry cookie quickly

You quickly created a barrier between you and Affogato cookie and Crunchy Chip cookie to avoid the metal claws the warrior intended to slam into Affogato cookie.

“Stop using (Name) cookie as a shield!” Caramel Arrow cookie shouted “As if you can even strike me without them!!” He laughed, dipping you once more before yelping when he was rugby tackled by Black Raisin cookie.

You groaned while standing up, sweat dripping from your face when you awkwardly stood and saw they were just running around you in circles attempting to catch Affogato cookie. You knew this would get nowhere so you decided to call this fight off.

“Hey!! Stop throwing things around and let’s talk like adults!!” You tried to shout when Crunchy Chip cookie almost chomped down on Affogato’s arm. Arrows, punches, spells and sand were being thrown around, all avoiding you as Affogato cookie ran around you to hide from the others.

“Listen!! My baby is probably scared and I can’t allow this fight go on! It’s getting ridiculous!” You sighed when you saw Affogato cookie get thrown by Wildberry cookie, ready to raise the ground again and protect your housemate. You jumped on a ground pillar where Affogato was, pulling him up as you tried to-

CRACK

Time seemed to slow down for you. A sudden shock racked through your dough. Whatever force hit you had pushed your weight back, violently shoving you off the pillar and onto the ground, crashing hard and rolling a few feet away.

“F-Fu… Fuck…” You gritted your teeth in pain when your back hit a tree, causing more pain throughout your body. Whatever hit you didn’t register to your brain while you tried to get up.

“(NAME) COOKIE!!” A scream ripped through the air that caused your vision to clear up ever so slightly. You could see figures running up to your wounded form, your eyes drifting to what struck you.

An arrow.

When Affogato ducked, he must’ve been avoiding that arrow, but you weren’t paying attention, getting hit in the stomach due to your lack of awareness. Lucky you, you were never the fast reflex cookie like others.

“That’s not good…” You wheezed out, jam spilling through your hands, staining your dough red. You leaned your head back feeling a hand gently holding it to the grass. Your eyes could see Affogato cookie and his fearful expression, pupils wide while watching your wound.

“Don’t- don’t let… Doughy see this…” You managed to strain out, your head tilting back to look at your house. You hoped Affogato cookie left them in your bed, tucked to sleep to avoid witnessing their parent bleeding out.

You could try to heal yourself with your magic, but it’s hard to focus on where your shaky hands were when your eyes were failing on letting you see clearly.

Your head suddenly felt heavy, body shutting down from how much you were bleeding. You couldn’t die like this, not when you had a cookie depending on you. Your hearing began to fade, not being able to hear Affogato cookie screaming for you while he was being dragged away by Wildberry cookie.

Your eyes grew black spots so you barely saw the way Black Raisin and Caramel Arrow cookie hovered over your body, panicked looks as they seemed to be shouting for something. You couldn’t comprehend as you felt your mind going dark.

Life doesn’t seem fair, does it? First your isolation from others, your heartbreak, having a child you weren’t ready for, frozen in time from your own magic, now this? Despite it all, you were still young and couldn’t get to do what you always wanted to do, the sights you wanted to see, now all will be gone with the one cookie you truly grew to love.

“Couldn’t… even… name them… yet…”

A/N: Welp, you died.

IM KIDDING GANG, baddies never die 😼 but good lord this took forever on the count that I was dying myself lmao, but hopefully this would feed my children!!

Come and take your oats my little ones!

Taglist: @pix-stuff @jellystar-star @moon0goddess @lettucel0ver @lithiumval @degenerates-posts @ryuushou @deathbynarcisstick @silverklaus @artistwithcreativeburnout @middevil465 @jsprien213 @1abi @oliviaewl @redkarmakai @nxdxsworld @the-dumber-scaramouche @sc3n3mo-t3to @tw-om-gi-hs-56387 @bunniotomia @welpthisisboring @rad4bean @ithoughtthinks @reeyy0-2 @ceramic-raven @danart501 @esposadomd @trashlanternfish360 @jjoppees @nervousalpacalady @eyeless-kun @pinkcloudcat @lunamonkeypower @soriansick @your-favorite-god @fandom-freak-123 @cupid73 @solarisstarrsolomonsbeloved @otterluver05 @dondonrulerofall @octo-artist

[starbluethunder]

a BIT early to new years on this, but here it FINALLY is!!!

merry christmas and happy new year to all my lovely friends ive made this year! theres a lot of people i missed on here,, im sorry if you wanted to be included, i did NOT get to NEARLY as many people as i wanted to put! but im always open for drawing your character any other time though <3 youre in my heart :,3

its kinda weird to think only a year ago i didnt really know many people on here and now i know enough people to fill a canvas completely like this! this includes everyone who is on here AND that i havent added!! im so grateful to have met all of you on here and tumblr has been such a fun and awesome experience, meeting all of these talented and cool people <3 maybe one day i can do this again when i have less of a day i want it finished by, and i can add as many of you as possible. but for now i am so done. LOL

so i hope this little late christmas gift shows my gratitude to all of you, every nice little comment you guys have left for me or conversations weve had or even if you've made art for me too ^_^ youre all so so kind to me. i love u guys sm

under the cut is an edit with everyone on here's usernames (some exluding ones who didn't want to/didnt have a username)

if i misspelled any of these i will cry btw. correct me but i will cry. LOL might as well uh. tag all of you because i dont know how else to get it to everyone .... sniles

@scuggyfangs @hexedbug @cerpiscool @demonoftheseas @kaithesnek @tacoma-narrows @the-motan @juneibyou @chromonym @apotheoseity @adenator @malwarechips @cemeterypet @funky-dealer @blizzard-nightlamps @paradichlorosocksy @battiegutz @shock-micro @starryspiritz @tropical-starlight @redwyverndht @xxc00l-k1dzxx @devilsurvivor-2-recordbreaker @cannidolly @sp1derc1der @swizik @81rye @neoplaysrhythmgames @mewveepaws @astral-alignment @guildes

holy smokes. thats a lots. really hoping im not missing any of u there lol

[shegatsby]

Silent Obsession

Summary; After he became a civilian Bucky's mind, body and soul was trying to adapt to his new life. He swore to himself that he was going to live the rest of his life alone, until he saw her. His distroted mind and broken soul ached to be with her, to be around her all the time. Could he manage it or ruin it for both of them?

A/N: Hi babies! I've missed you so much, here is the new chapter. Hope you like it. Let me know what you think :)

Let me know if you want to be TAGGED!

Warnings: Domestic abuse.

Words: 2.790K

Chapter Six

Bucky made the kid wear the helmet, and together they rode to 24/7 open shop, Y/N’s second job. He didn’t want to look like a predator and also didn’t want to be an asshole but he had a good excuse now. Helping the kid getting something to eat, and keeping him company was something he wanted to do and also seeing her was a cherry on top.  He only wished that Steve one day would grow up to be a nice gentleman. Once he parked the bike on the same spot he removed the helmet from the kid and helped him get off, ‘’You’re going to meet a friend of mine so be nice. She is very important to me.’’ He warned playfully and nudged him, Steve chuckled and made fun of Bucky, all he did was roll his eyes. ‘’Alright alright. Let’s go.’’

The doors opened and they walked inside the store, the fluorescent lights welcomed them first and then he watched her get up from the most likely uncomfortable chair and smile at them. Bucky could see the questioning in her eyes, ‘’Hey Steve, this is Y/N.’’ his hand was on the kid’s shoulder, they approached to the desk. ‘’Hello Steve.’’ She extended her hand to the kid, even though she looked tired Bucky could see the shine in her eyes, it was rare and he was happy to experience it. ‘’Nice to meet you ma’am.’’ Steve said as Bucky thought him once, he always told Steve to address women who were older than him as ‘’ma’am’’ even though this was modern times it was obvious that Bucky was a nostalgic man with seeking interactions from his past. Y/N couldn’t help but chuckle, ‘’Nice to meet you too little man.’’ She replied with a sweet voice that Bucky wanted to record and listen to it later. ‘’Steve, why don’t you skim the aisles and find something to eat, and pick a treat for Alpine?!’’ Bucky told the kid and he just nodded and left them alone. Bucky turned back to Y/N, ‘’Alpine?’’ she asked rather curiously, ‘’My cat.’’ Bucky responded shortly. There was a pause between them, she sat back down, ‘’He seems like a nice boy.’’ She commented to get a reaction out of him, was Steve his child? His nephew? Because she had noticed the bruise on the kid’s face and she wasn’t happy about it, and the only reason she kept her calm was to not make the child uncomfortable. She knew how it could be once the wounds are recognized by a pair of peculiar eyes.

Bucky immediately picked up on that, ‘’Yeah he is, he is uh.. my neighbor’s kid. Brought him here so that he could have some break from his parents fighting.’’ He had to explain to make it clear. Y/N couldn’t believe her ears, every time she had given up on humanity someone or something would prove her otherwise and this time Bucky, the stranger she had met few weeks ago was bringing his neighbor’s kid to the store so that the kid would be away from the trauma for a while. She had this sudden urge to jump from the counter and hug him, thank him for looking out for someone without expecting anything in return. She had to put her body’s pressure on her heels so that she wouldn’t do that, ‘’That’s kind of you to look out for him.’’ She commented, her eyes on his blue ones, so easy to get lost in them so she busied herself with something on the counter. Bucky only shrugged his shoulder, didn’t know how to respond when someone, especially her made a sweet comment about something he did. They stood there in silence, before Bucky could ask or say anything a group of young men entered and Bucky stepped aside to watch to be honest… glare.

They were a group of four and in their mid 20s, probably college students. Bucky observed them and the way Y/N greeted them, she like always she had a smile but it was small and hollow not like the ones she gave him which made his chest and pants feel tighter than usual. The three of the men went to get whatever they wanted but one of them stayed to chat with her, Bucky’s hands were in the pockets of his pants, he was leaning against the near wall, glaring holes at the back of the man’s body.

‘’So… do you always work here beautiful?’’ he dared to ask her a question, he wasn’t a skinny man but not beefy either, he had golden locks and a charming smile, he was leaning slightly on the counter, ‘’Yes.’’ She replied nonchalantly, ‘’I should come here more often then.’’ The scumbag was about to lose his vocal chords if he kept talking at her like that and Bucky was happy to do it with his bare hand. ‘’Everyone is welcomed here to shop.’’ Y/N was keeping herself busy on the counter, she had always experienced something like that so it was normal to her but with a quick glance what she saw was that Bucky’s crystal blue eyes turning dark, his lips were a flat line and he looked like if she gave him the word he would jump at the guy, she felt powerful in a way but maybe she was imagining things, maybe Bucky was just waiting for Steve to finish shopping. She didn’t want to get ahead of herself, every time she did that she was disappointed to her bones. The blonde guy’s friends came with snacks and packs of beer, Y/N scanned them and then one of them paid, ‘’See ya later!’’ the blonde said with a wink, she didn’t say anything, only gave him an empty smile and thankfully the group left, Bucky pushed himself from the wall he was leaning on, he approached, his boots were heavy on the white floors. ‘’Does this happen often?’’ of course it did, with a pretty face like that Bucky was surprised she wasn’t kidnapped, that thought gave him a nasty idea which he pushed away, he wanted things to be smooth and natural. Y/N shrugged her shoulders, ‘’I don’t mind, mostly they’re harmless.’’ She couldn’t face him, she couldn’t show that she was scared but she also felt somewhat safe with his presence. Bucky sighed in frustration, she had a ‘’boyfriend’’ who let her work for hours and deal with disrespectful and potentially dangerous men…. He wanted to grab her shoulders and shake her so hard that she would wake up from her trance but no, she had to come to him willingly. Soon Steve came with a sandwich, a juice box and a treat for Alpine. ‘’Finally found the one you like?’’ Y/N she asked as he scanned the items, ‘’Yeah, Bucky always gets me this one, it’s delicious.’’ It was true, Bucky would get that sandwich for him or give him the money to buy it as he went to school. ‘’Oh?’’ she looked at Bucky, ‘’Maybe I should try it, since you said it’s delicious.’’ Little Steve was oblivious to the chemistry between the adults so he was eager to eat his sandwich and drink his juice, Y/N got a pack of gums also but didn’t scan it, ‘’Here you go.’’ She gave the items to the little kid, ‘’I thought you might enjoy gums, it’s on me.’’ And she winked, ‘’No please-‘’ Bucky began but she silenced him, ‘’I want to, Bucky.’’ Her voice was soft and she was looking under those lashes, the way she said his name almost made him drop to his knees. ‘’Alright.’’

He raised his hands in defeat, ‘’Say thank you Steve.’’ Little kid was tearing the package of the sandwich, ‘’Thank you ma’am.’’ He said in hurry which made Y/N chuckle and Bucky liked the sound of it. ‘’How about giving me a hug?’’ Y/N asked Steve as she left the counter and came to stand before the duo, she knelt and gave him a hug, she liked children and in that moment she slightly hoped for a child but then she pulled her back to reality, Leo wasn’t interested in that, he never brought it up and when she did Leo would always say he wasn’t ready and would always bring out the negative aspects of having kids, she had given up on asking and talking about that topic long ago. ‘’See you around kid.’’ She got up and turned to Bucky who was watching the scene in awe, she was an angel and Y/N was slowly making him believe that there is still good in this world. ‘’See you around too… Bucky.’’ She addressed him, her hands on her hips,  he was trying so hard to sound normal, ‘’Yeah, see you around.’’ Bucky said, his eyes boring into her soul deeply, ‘’Let’s go Steve.’’ He reluctantly announced and they left the shop together. Bucky rolled his eyes at little Steve’s comments and helped him on the bike, he rode back to the apartment, made sure Steve got inside safe and then he gave quickly gave the treat to Alpine who was happy to see him, he pet her head and told her that he had to go back and guard Y/N’s work place, like a bodyguard.

He parked at his regular place, leaned on the bike and watched. He could see her walking inside, carry stuff, label things, he wanted to just go inside and pull her out of there, what kind of a man would let his woman work at a place like this? Or even let his woman work at all? He didn’t care if he was perceived as a cave man, that’s what he believed in. He made a mental note that if that little boy in his 20s ever came here again he was going to find his address and maybe pay a visit. He didn’t want to kill anyone but if it ever got to it then… he wouldn’t mind it since his intention would be protecting her. His blue eyes were scanning the area also, his super soldier mind calculating the fire escape route, or places to hide. A stray cat jumped from the trashcan near him and rubbed itself on his boots, he knelt down to pet the cat, it was black, long fur, it looked like a hybrid of Maine Coon. It looked the opposite of Alpine, Bucky’s cat Alpine was white as snow and this one was as black as coal. Stray animals have always been approaching him so he was used to it. Soon the cat left him, crossed the street and marched to the shop Y/N was working at, he checked his watch, her shift was over and then he looked at the shop’s door and there she was, out and feeding the black cat. So she was also a cat person like him, to find a common interest between them was a delight to him, Bucky thrived on that thought. Maybe she also wanted a cat but didn’t have the budget, or her ‘’boyfriend’’ didn’t want an animal in the house.. he rolled his eyes on that thought.

From the dark alley he was unseen by her so it gave him a comfort and a certain luxury to watch her, once she was done petting the animal she started to walk and that was his cue. He wore his helmet, got onto his bike and waited a little so that she wouldn’t be able to hear the engine, later he started to follow her like a shadow. Her routine was simple, she was going home and he knew. The city was getting louder and louder by the time sun rose to its rightful place. Bucky saw her stop for a second and looking up at her building, what was she thinking? And then with a defeat she lowered her head and walked inside. Bucky’s job was done for today.

Till next Monday Bucky couldn’t make his presence known, it would be too obvious so he lurked behind the shadows, leaned on the corners and watched her from afar. He was getting a coffee from that café closer to the flower shop, hanging around for few hours and then when it was evening he was in that same alley, leaning on his bike and making sure she had nice customers shopping there.

For Y/N the only nice day she had was when Bucky and his neighbor’s child came to the shop she was working because Leo was back at home, little happiness she had with her new acquaintances was gone and replaced with constant stress and feeling of threat. Whenever Leo took off and came back he would be in a very bad mood so they would argue a lot, she knew how to speak without provoking him but sometimes something would slip from her lips, a remark or a sarcastic comment and then she would be in danger. Tonight was one of those nights, it was Sunday and she was getting ready to sleep, Leo was drinking in the living room and she asked him to not leave any empty beer bottles on the floor because she had cut her feet early this morning, thankfully she had bandages at home but she was limping, it wasn’t going to be easy walking to her jobs for a few days. Leo, with a rush bolted to his feet and then started screaming, it was unintelligible but it was about something ’’I can do whatever I want! I live here!’’ etc. She tried to calm him down but he was getting worse and she said ‘’This isn’t your home!’’ it was true, it was her little home where she was happy and content until he came. That comment was the reason why Leo grabbed her by her throat and smashed her to the nearest wall. She was struggling for air, her hands trying to push Leo away from her but it was in vain, he was much taller and stronger than her. Soon Leo came to his senses, maybe he realized that he needed her even though she didn’t need him at all. Once she could breath normally she saw Leo walking back to the couch and finishing his beer, she slowly walked back to her bedroom and locked the door.

The next morning, Y/N had to wake up earlier than usual because she was limping and that was slowing her down. She got dressed, wore her blue jeans and a simple shirt, got her bag and left the apartment without a single sound, Leo was on the couch, snoring so she didn’t make him breakfast. On the way to the flower shop she had only one thing in her mind, Bucky. Was he going to come? Every Monday he came to purchase red roses, suddenly she wanted to hide, she wasn’t feeling well so she didn’t want to face him, his deep blue eyes seemed like they knew things about her that she didn’t even know. Maybe she could pass the rose order to Melanie, she would be very happy to attend him… and with that thought she had a bitter taste in her mouth. She didn’t like the idea. Y/N started working as soon as she arrived, so many orders to handle, Melanie was a bit late but Y/N wasn’t going to say  anything to their boss, she was a university student and probably had her assignments and finals draining her. ‘’Oh my God! What happened to your neck?!’’ Melanie froze as soon as she saw, in that moment Y/N cursed herself for forgetting to cover it with something, her hand instinctively went to her neck, ‘’It’s nothing..’’ she had to find something to change the subject and thankfully a customer entered. Throughout the day Y/N avoided Melanie, she kept herself busy and attended the customers, of course Melanie noticed her limping, she wanted to ask but she also felt like Y/N didn’t want to talk about it.

She dropped the topic for now. On their lunch break Y/N insisted on going to get some sandwiches but Melanie didn’t let her, she was limping so Melanie got her purse and just waltzed out of the flower shop in her long dress and wavy blonde hair, she was beautiful and Y/N noticed how the heads turned every time she entered a room, she looked healthy and happy which were the opposite of Y/N at the moment… and for a long time. Y/N sighed heavily and then jumped on the counter, waiting for Melanie, before she could react to what was happening it was too late because he had walked in.

Tag List: @pao-prazz @ruexj283 @lacey-mercylercy @idontcareforausernamesblog @the-mess-in-my-head @chiyayaa @shadyfestivalperfection @noblesoule-16

Thank you for reading. :)

[gothgleek]

How Many Licks? (Just Bite It)

Angus Tully x fem!reader

Summary: You work at the University’s mail room sorting packages and trying to keep yourself from boredom. However- not that you would ever admit it out loud- you look forward to Thursday afternoons when Angus Tully stops by.

Based on my post Dominic Sessa looking like he bites people.

Word Count: 1,900+

Notes: She/her pronouns, Afab reader, Christmas mention, biting, cunnilingus, unprotected sex, unsafe sex, semi-public sex, sex at the workplace, overstimulation, quickies, reader being a brat, calling each other ‘slut’, everyone involved is over the age of 18

Notes: Huge thank you to my friend, Mera for helping me come up with what to call Angus because there is no way I’m moaning that name either fictionally or irl. It’s like moaning ‘Ulysses’ or ‘Cornelius.’ Please be nice as this is the first fanfic I’ve ever posted on Tumblr and first ever reader insert I’ve ever written. I tried being as neutral as possible when describing physical features but please let me know if there is anything that takes you out. Specifically I tried saying bite marks instead of bruises because not all skin tones bruise easily but I’m sure I missed some.

Comments, likes, and reblogs are appreciated 💕💕💕

Minors DNI

Your bright red stockings paired well with your wool black dress that hits you mid-thigh. You couldn’t see Angus from this angle, but you could feel his gaze rising up your legs and to the garter belt as you climbed the ladder. You knew he was a boob man but it was too cold for a v-neck dress. You put his package on the top shelf specifically so you could show off your legs when he arrived.

“Thanks, I got them Black Friday shopping.” You tell him, stepping down the ladder, his package on your hip. “Which is what I assume this is?” You shake the box in your hands. It’s not heavy but you can tell it’s packed to the brim.

“Hope so,” You hear him unwrap a lollipop and pop it in his mouth. You cringe as you hear him bite the lollipop.

You step off the ladder and tuck the box under your breasts, pushing them up more. “If you keep biting them, I’m going to start hiding them when you stop by.”

He smiles obnoxiously. “Then you would’ve hid them away by now.”

You roll your eyes, putting the box on the counter. “It’s disgusting.”

“No, it’s actually pretty tasty,” He smirked and took the used lollipop stick out of his mouth. “Wanna guess what flavor it is?” Angus sticks his artificially red tongue out.

“You’re such a slut.” You roll your eyes and shake your head.

---

The piles of new shipments kept the two of you hidden from the public eye as Angus got on his knees, pushing you against the wall. Your stockings had been quickly disposed of, tossed over his shoulder before you could say anything. His mouth was on your left knee, pressing a kiss as he opened your legs. One warm hand rests on your stomach, balancing himself.

He places a sloppy, open mouthed kiss on your inner thigh, above your knee. He licked upwards and bit down, sucking on the flesh between his teeth. He mirrors his actions on your left thigh. You hissed, knowing (and loving) that it would leave marks.

“You smell fucking amazing,” He says against your skin, his big brown eyes looking up at you. Motivated by your scent, Angus’s kisses get sloppier and while his bites are quicker, it is no less painful as he moves upward your legs. You glanced at the entrance to the office, double checking you could freely respond to his actions.

“God, you’re fucking soaked,” Angus said smirking, the cold air making your clit pulse. His thumb lightly moved over your lace covered pussy.

“Did you get jealous of the lollipop? The way I licked,” You jumped as his tongue touched your clit, the lace of your panties adding to the friction. “And bit?” His teeth graze against it.

“God, you’re such a dirty slut,” You tell him, only half teasing.

“And you’re a loud slut,” Angus teases and pushes your dress upwards. “Bite on this.”

You wordlessly accepted and clamp down on the polyester fabric. He slowly pulled down your red panties to show him your beautiful pussy. Since your lower half and most of your torso was visible, Angus greedily took in the sight of your bare stomach and underboob. He kisses your clit and spits on it. He traces his tongue over the sensitive nub and gives you slow, deliberate licks, creating a bigger mess between your thighs.

You let out muffled moans, your fingers tangled in his curly hair and grinding your hips for more friction. Angus once told you he would die a happy man if that meant being between your legs. Today is a good day to test that. You grip his hair, forcing his mouth to wrap around your clit, an action he responds to with a hum of approval. The vibrations make your hips roll and back arch. You can feel him laugh because he knows he has you where he wants you but you cannot care about that now. You hold his head there, pleading whimpers begging for more. Angus removes his hands from your pussy so he could grip your thighs for balance but makes no effort to loosen your grip.

Embarrassingly, it doesn’t take you long to reach your peak. Not when his mouth is making you feel so, so good. Your dress falls down as your mouth opens, a strangled cry echoing in the room, and your nails dig into his scalp as you cum. Angus keeps licking you as if you’re not melting around his mouth. As if your legs are not shaking in his hands from overstimulation. Eventually you cannot take it anymore and you have to push him away. Still, he licks up the mess you’ve created on your thighs before standing to face you with a satisfied smirk.

The intensity of your orgasm leaves you feeling dizzy so his hands stay on your hips as he rises. Though his face is painted with arrogance, Angus gently sits you on the table your boss reserved for processing packages. He lifts your dress over your head and tosses it to the side, impatiently but gently. Your nipples pebble because of the cold air and his lustful gaze.

Eyes never leaving yours, Angus unbuckles his belt and pulls his cock out. He pushed you against the table, kissing you at the same time. You wrap your arms around his neck as you taste his mouth- a combination of your pussy and his strawberry lollipop.

His hand gently pushed your thighs wider as his other hand slipped a finger between your entrance. His thumb gently rubbed your clit in exactly the way you taught him so you couldn’t help the moans that escaped your mouth. He slid another finger in and you gasped out a “Yes!” You rode his fingers, chasing your pleasure. Your moans ricocheting off the walls, not caring how slutty you acted.

But he cared.

Angus pulled away from your breast, not bothering to wipe away the string of spit connecting his lips to your breast. The hand on your thigh paused your movements and his fingers slowed.

“Tell me you’re my slut,” he smirked. You whined in response. “Come on, say it.”

He gently lays you back on the table and takes his shirt off. Angus turned around to see the clock on the wall ticking down the minutes until your boss came back from lunch.

“Tick tock.” He said, emphasizing each word with the tap of his cock on your entrance. “Tick, tock.”

You had no doubt he would elongate this. Last time you pushed your luck, you weren’t caught, but you didn’t you cum either. Angus had the biggest shit eating grin when he came in the following day and you begged him to fuck you.

But you still weren’t going to give him the satisfaction.

And he knew that.

“How does it feel to be a slut?” He murmured against your ear. Angus buried his face in the crook of your neck, biting down and pulling satisfied moans out of your mouth. “To be my slut?”

“I’m not your slut,” You protested between your moans.

He stopped biting your neck to simply nip at it, moving downwards to your breasts. Your trembling fingers grabbed at the curls on the back of his head, encouraging him. Agnus took a nipple into his hot mouth causing your left hand to dig into his shoulder and your right hand to pull his hair. Angus let out a muffled moan of pleasure and sucked on your nipple harder. There was tension building in your stomach but you couldn’t release it until you were around him.

“Say it,” Angus said as he alternated between your breasts. “Say it and I’ll fuck you.”

“Fine! I’m a slut!” You cried. “I’m your slut! Now please! Fuck me!”

Angus chuckled and slid into you. You instinctively wrapped your legs around him, pulling him closer. His eyes fluttered as he felt your heat surround his cock. He stared down at you as he found his rhythm. his fingers finding your clit again. Angus’s fingers moved in the same rhythm as his hips.He moved his hips faster, forcing your back to arch off the desk. Moaning, you clenched around his cock.

Angus kept his pace but his mouth suctioned around your breast as his tongue swirled around your nipple faster. The hand not on your clit reached over to grab your other breast, rolling the nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

“Keep going…” You whined, almost begging. The tension was reaching its peak. “So… close…”

Hearing you cry out, Angus pulled away from your beast and watched you fall apart.

He tried to fuck you through your orgasm but he couldn’t help but he wasn’t far behind you. Not when pleasure washed over your face. Not when you squeezed him like that. Not when your voice echoed like that in the small room. With a stuttering groan, Angus came inside your pussy while biting your shoulder.

Your legs loosened around his waist as your body relaxed but your pussy still clenched around his twitching cock, taking every drop of him. Angus’s body relaxed and his mouth loosened its grip on your shoulder. But you can feel his teeth scraping against your tender skin. He pressed gentle, open mouth kisses against your neck as he pulled out of you. You whimpered as he did that, already missing him inside you.

Tiredly and lazily, he kissed his way down your body until he got to his knees again. Angus spread your legs again, watching his cum dripping out of you and pooling on the table. You felt his mouth cover your pussy once again. Though tired, you couldn’t help but arch your back a little when you felt his tongue lap at your sensitive pussy, cleaning you. Angus pulled away before you could cum, though you are thankful he did as your body was not ready to accept another orgasm.

He helped you to your feet and kissed you gently on the mouth. You returned the kiss, leaning against him for balance. However, your orgasms still left you a little tired so you had to break the kiss to retain your balance. Not that Angus minded, he still kissed you, this time peppering them on your neck. Your hands loosely held his neck before you noticed the clock.

“Unless you have a turtleneck for me in that package, don’t you dare leave another hickey on my neck,” You told him as your wits came back to you and he laughed against your skin. He kissed your neck and went to his package on the counter.

“As a matter of fact,” He said, tearing it open and digging around, not caring he was still naked. “I do.”

He pulled out a knit black sweater with a thick, folded turtleneck. You accepted it and marveled at how soft it was.

“For me?” Your eyes were wide.

“Yeah, well, you always complain it’s cold down here, ” Angus shrugged nonchalantly but you could see color rising to his cheeks.

“Plus you know,” He brushed your hair off your shoulder. “It’ll hide those bite marks I left behind.”

You look down at your body to see a map of bite marks and bruises identical to his mouth and fingers. You snatched your new sweater from his hands and threw it on.

[failing-to-write-again]

What would it be like waking up with Shu, Reiji, or Ruki?

So sorry I didn't see this Tumblr did not send me a notification!

But thank you for the ask and I will answer all three!!!

Under the cut because my writing is long and I might be mildly suggestive but nothing explicit!

Shu

I imagine waking with Shu would feel like a Saturday morning in Winter, where the heating is on and your bed is so warm and outside it's a cool snowy light.

Rolling over and feeling the slight chill of the vampire, his chest cool but the arm you slept on warmed by your body heat.

I think Shu, as a more subtle romantic, would enjoy like sleeping naked or at least shirtless with you. While throwing perverted comments around to deflect from showing his true sappy side, yet never actually going further then running his fingers along your spine as he holds you against himself slowly heating up.

Hearing him deeply inhale and stir as he feels your movement, eyes opening slightly and smiling before nuzzling between the pillows and your hair. A grumble of protest at having been disturbed.

If it is a weekend or holiday you give in easily resettling into the peaceful feeling of simple having skin contact with someone so intimately. Shu lifting the covers to cover you more as goosebumps cover your body slightly due to his lower body temperature.

A personal head cannon is that after you began to have an actual close relationship he would have servants bring hot water bottles to your room close to bed so you didn't have to be as effected by his chill. However by morning the once warm devices are now useless, yet he's less cold after a night of having you next to him.

Eventually you may try coax him awake. As he hides himself against your neck, feeling him voice complaints in a gravelly morning voice against your skin.

"My princess is so pushy, just rest order the servants to do the stupid errands. They're yours now."

Reiji

Reiji could go one of two ways depending on the day. A busy day or a holiday. Either way I think his room would feel fresh but still warm to wake in.

On the average day Reiji wakes you either accidentally as he gets dressed and ready for the day, or with a drink and some breakfast delivered personally to your room. He claims it's to prevent your morning mood effecting the household but it is actually to just keep you to himself a moment longer even if it's while you're both busy preparing for a long day ahead.

He runs his fingers through your hair to wake you, slowly massaging your scalp. You'd be surprised that it doesn't put you deeper asleep.

On the rare days he doesn't feel the need to wake as early he's sensual and soft. Rare for someone as prim and proper as him.

It's canon from the sleeping with a vampire audios that Reiji wears silk pajamas and bed sheets with high quality mattresses. I see him ordering you matching pajamas and night dresses in similar designs to his and he secretly waits until you get yours on before changing. He refused to admit when he's sweet. He melts when you sleep in his shirt after nightly romps in the sheets.

Ever the leading partner, you wake up being spooned by him either facing him or with you back against his chest and his face buried in your hair. You used to worry about it irritating him at first until one night you felt him nuzzle against it intentionally as he smelt the shampoo you had recently used.

Like Shu I feel he would do things to motivate the temperature difference. However maybe an electric blanket or a potion that will last the entire night.

Deepest as morning voice, grainy too completely unlike his firm even tone when awake. It's a personal side only you see. And forget Shu being the lazy one when Reiji has the time to sleep in with you. The man is begging for 5 more minutes.

"My love, stay...hm? Need a drink? I left one on the nightstand. ... You can't reach it?... Cruel woman treating your lover like this."

Ruki

Ruki's room must smell like candles and new books. A nice toasty feeling to wake to.

Clingy is the best way to describe how I feel he sleeps. So scared you may slip through his fingers or leave like others before, Ruki holds you close as you sleep.

I imagine he sleeps on his stomach due to having to sleep like that for so long after he initially got the scars on his back. His arm around your waist and head turned to rest abobe your shoulder.

The exception being when he reads a book to help you sleep. You lay, head against his chest or in his lap as he sits against a pile of pillows. You wake to his head against yours and the book left open on his lap as his arms encircle you.

Ever the slight sadist, on days you need to be up faster he might lightly pinch your sides to wake you. Chuckling as you squirm and complain at the rude awakening. Kissing you forehead in apology.

During nights where he has particularly bad nightmares you may have to wake him. Holding him against your chest and brushing through his hair as you comfort him best you can. You don't know when you both nod back off but you wake the next day to him still there resting more peaceful than ever. That being said night terrors have decreased drastically since you began to share a bed.

After you both wake up properly he holds you in his lap as you discuss your plans for the day. He takes his time laying kisses along your shoulders and down your sternum, a personal good luck ritual that makes the day a little easier to begin.

"Hm... where do you think your going? I assume like me you don't want to leave my side yet. Especially with those fingers tracing along my body. How shameless."

[attemptingtowritehalfwaydecently]

how to disappear

Bakugou x reader

Based on "How to Disappear" by Lana Del Rey. Red words are lyrics from the song.

Cw: angst with a bittersweet ending, mild depictions of violence, nightmares, language, suicidal ideation, death of a sibling, and yelling/arguing.

Notes: this is only my second time writing fanfiction and my first time actually posting on tumblr. Please be nice to me :')

John met me down on the boulevard. Cried on his shoulder ‘cause life is hard.

It was during your third year at UA that a thought crossed your mind. That Katsuki Bakugou could mean something to you. There you were, sitting on the couch of the common room, wrapped in his arms as you sobbed and beat on him over the death of your little sister.

“If only I’d known.” “If only I’d been there.” “If only I’d warned her more, then that villain wouldn’t have gotten her…” Through all your what-ifs, all your fists pounding against his chest, he never said a word. He just held onto you, anchoring you as you got lost in the waves of grief.

The waves came in over my head. What you been up to my baby? Haven’t seen you ‘round here lately.

After a few weeks away from school, spent with your family, you finally returned to UA. You didn’t know how to approach Bakugou, didn’t know what to say to him. So you didn't approach him, didn’t say anything to him. But you caught his lingering glances. You saw the hint of concern in his eyes when you weren’t keeping up as well as you should be in training.

You hadn’t been sleeping well. Your dreams were plagued by the villain attack. Being right there, watching your dear baby sister get left for dead. Bloody and beaten, chest shuttering, as if her body is saying ‘This is too much. I can’t do it anymore.’ You’d scream for help, run to her, and hold her, except no sound came out of your mouth. And no movement comes from your body. You are just forced to watch the life seep out of her body. Slowly and slowly until…

You woke up screaming. You turned your lamp on because you could still see her body against the blackness surrounding you. As you look around your room, taking in where you are, your eyes catch a picture of her sitting atop your dresser, and suddenly you’re too aware of where you are. And where she isn’t. Here you were, tucked away safely in your room, with dozens of heroes only a phone call away should you ever be in danger. While she suffered her final moments alone, left lying helplessly in that alleyway. Forgotten by the world.

She had just turned 12, bragging about how she was gonna go to UA High and become a hero “just like big sis.”

You couldn’t stand your dorm room, so you spent most nights in the common room, staring off toward a wall and drowning in your own thoughts.

You stopped eating lunch. The idea of eating Lunch Rush’s food, that she was so giddy to try, made you feel sick to your stomach.

One night, Bakugou found you in the common room. Sitting on the floor in a corner, so lost in your own head that you couldn’t even hear the sound of your stomach growling. So he did the only thing he could think to do, he made you something to eat.

At first, he just left the bowl next to you and hoped you’d snap out of it long enough to see what he left, that you’d realize just how hungry you were and eat what seemed like your first proper meal in a week. But when he’d come back down early in the morning, he’d find you in that same spot. Passed out, leaned against the wall, the bowl of soup at your side cold and untouched.

He started snapping you out of your trance himself, sitting next to you, staring you down until you finished every last drop of your soup. Eventually, he started eating with you, hoping you wouldn’t be quite so hesitant if you weren’t being watched like a hawk by someone who had nothing better to do.

Slowly, he got you to come out of your shell. He started by making off-handed comments about things that happened at school that day. He would watch you process what he said for a minute until a flicker of recognition flashed in your eyes and you blankly nodded back at him. One by one, he coaxed words out of you until you were able to hold small conversations, which evolved into two-sided, pleasant discussions about whatever was happening in both of your worlds.

The day he finally got a laugh out of you, he felt like he’d just single-handedly taken down the worst villain the world has ever seen. The day he asked you out on a date, and you said yes, he felt **higher than any villain takedown could make him feel.

All of the guys tell me lies but you don’t. You just crack another beer and pretend that you’re still here.

it's been two years since you both graduated from U.A. You'd tried your hand at hero work, but it was all too hard, too laced with guilt and horror, so you gave up. found yourself an office job that provided more security than being a hero ever would. Every evening, you'd have dinner ready on the table for when Katsuki got home from his patrols. You'd eat in silence, and then you'd sit on opposite ends of the couch. you, trying to make conversation and asking about his day, and him ignoring you. Bottle of booze in one hand, and the remote in the other, deeming the news (that he no doubt was already up to date on) more important than you.

Joe met me down at the training yard. Cuts on his face 'cause he fought too hard. I know he's in over his head. But I love that man like nobody can.

Your nights consist of cleaning Katsuki up after fights where he got too careless. You try to scold him, to make him realize that what he's doing is too dangerous. But he just brushes you off, telling you to be quiet and keep disinfecting his wound. You want to scream at him, to smack some sense into him. But he was there for you in your darkest times. you needed to be there for him.

He moves mountains and pounds them to ground again. I watched the guys getting high as they fight for the things that they hold dear. To forget the things they fear.

"I can't believe you were so reckless. Do you have any idea how much danger you put yourself in?!" You scream at him, on the verge of tears. "I don't want to hear it, miss ‘i sit behind a desk all fuckin day’.” He shoots back, walking away into the bedroom. You follow him. “This isn’t about me! Even our friends are worried about you. Eijirou, Izuku, even Aoyama whose head is stuck up his ass 90% of the time!" You get no solid response to that, just grumbles of "shut up" and "whatever” Strewn along your speech. You snap, "Are you trying to kill yourself?!"

He finally, finally turns to face you, but the words that come out of his mouth are ones you never thought you'd hear from him “YEAH?, WELL MAYBE I AM. SOUNDS A WHOLE LOT BETTER THAN LISTENING TO YOU BITCHING ALL THE GODDAMN TIME." You freeze, your body refuses to move a single muscle as you stare at him. And he stares- no, glares right back at you, and then he turns around and slams the front door as he leaves. You wait all night for him to come back.

But he doesn't.

When you get back from your shift the following afternoon, the apartment is bare. The furniture is gone, cabinets empty, everything removed save for a single box in the middle of the living room with all your things thrown into it.

Now it's been years since I left New York. I've got a kid and two cats in the yard.

You’re far from Musutafu, sitting on your porch as you watch your husband play with your daughter out in the grass. A smile is on your face as you watch the man who treats you like you are the singular most important thing in his world care so gently for the most important thing in your life.

The California sun and the movie stars- I watch the skies getting light as I write, as I think about those years, as I whisper in your ear: I'm always going to be right here. No one's going anywhere.

It's impossible to avoid Katsuki, even hundreds of miles away. He's the number two hero now, and everyone in the world fawns over him. Even your little girl.

"Mommy! Mommy! He's so cool when he 'splodes the bad guys!" She begins mimicking his moves, adding little booms for dramatic effect. "Yeah, Sweetie? You like him that much?" To which she fervently nods. You pick her up and hold her on your lap. "Well, did you know that before you were born, your mommy was actually friends with Mr. Dynamight?" your daughter, in all her little four-year-old hyperactivity, loses her mind. Prying herself off your lap and running in circles until she finally comes back to you, stars in her eyes.

"You're still friends with him, right?” she asks you innocently. "No, baby, we're not, unfortunately." Truth is, you’re not in touch with anyone from UA. You haven't talked to any of your classmates since Katsuki...

Since things ended.

"Well, that's alright. Just talk to him and tell him you want to be friends again. Pretty please! I wanna meet Mr. Dynamight!" If only it were that easy. "I’m afraid it's not that simple, sweet girl. And besides, Mr. Dynamight's very busy these days. I doubt he even has time to talk." Your four-year-old climbs back up onto your lap with a huff, clearly not happy with how this conversation has rolled out. "Fine. But can you at least tell me about him, Mommy?"

And you do. You tell her how he’s the strongest person you've ever met, how he never bends his morals and always follows his heart. After a moment, your daughter asks, “Mommy, has he ever saved you?” You stop for a second, mulling over your answer.

“Yeah, sweetheart. He has.”

This is how to disappear.

[fishyaudio]

I LOVE YOUR ART SO MUCH RAHHGG

Thank you!!!

I don't want to get anyhow vent-y or parasocial with my audience, the internet's no place for getting emotional to strangers, but for a longer while I've had the need to write something more out about how I really deeply appreciate all comments of this sort, whether in asks or in actual comments/reblogs (and it's something I feel other artists may also feel/want to hear, so. Yeah, one post for emotional vulnerability as a treat). The community here on Tumblr, especially the Rain World fandom, I think is the first that made me feel truthly fulfilled as an internet artist/content creator and it was SUCH a big surprise when at first I went into it with a mindset of "eh whatever maybe 3 people will enjoy mu dumbass headcanons and weird ships".

I think everyone who creates things has doubts once in a while, I am no exception and have the terrible tendency (that I try to overcome! Working on bettering youself is fun and healthy) to overthink and distrust kind words about what I make. It's most likely because the places I posted art to before were all smaller circles and groups, where politeness and interest in each other's stuff was rather an unspoken rule of reciprocating investment. This is a double edged sword - it's fun to have a support system of closely-tied artists who are willing to help each other out, that's something I value a lot as well, but it is not fun when "they're invested because they like what I do" blends with "they're invested because that's the standard and they expect I get invested back even when maybe I don't want to as much" to the point one feels that everyone's just dishonest and nice to everyone out of courtesy.

Throwing art out to the game's tag on a whole new wild west of the internet (which Tumblr as a site was for me, I was only a sporadic tag scroller before lmao) is a whole another thing, I'd just drown in the sea of other people's stunning art if what I did just wouldn't sit with people. And that makes me appreaciate all the genuinely kind words I get so, so much more.

I am very sorry to use your ask as a start to a monolouge dear Anon, but it was a great occassion to say this;

If you as a viewer ever thought about something kind when seeing someone's art, please always say it out loud. There's no being too fangirly, too weird, you're not bothering a person by giving a comment, they will most definitely treasure all those thoughts and words like precious gold. And for artists - please remember that what you do is probably loved more than you hear or see. There's probably someone who shared your drawing with a friend, there's someone who looked at it for way longer than they would at other drawings, there's someone who wanted to comment but maybe forgot and just left with a like. It's a great thing to think about, really. This is semi-related to what I said before but just pretend that this motivational paragraph makes sense okay thanks

Ok sob stories over once again, thank you so much, anonymous asker

[doberbutts]

I’m kinda new to tumblr so idk if this is like, improper, but that recent shit about your folks sucking was rough. just like, to read. I can’t even imagine how hard it sucks to be there right now. but idk I wanted to shoot an anonymous ask and just be like “hey you’re gonna make it” which I know you already know but figured it would be nice to hear from someone else too, so. hang in there fellow trans person and fuck your family’s behavior

Oh I never did really fully explain what was happening did I?

My great aunt died on December 1 and it wasn't particularly unexpected (she was very old, and her husband died a few years ago on Dec 3) but it was quite sudden and without much warning. I drove to my parents' house to mourn and help with funeral arrangements and it was my first time visiting since right before covid and also since starting medical transition. I figured I'd be enduring a lot of misgendering and the like but wanted to be there for my aunt because I had a lot of wonderful memories of celebrating Christmas at her house with her and my uncle.

An assortment of little comments added up over the next 24 hours until my mother effectively called me stupid unprompted to my face as I drove her from my sister's house back to her own, because I'd said that my niece and nephew were quite smart and that wasn't an abnormality within our family. This is referring to my graduating at 16 and testing well into genius for my IQ, my sister winning several national awards for her poetry and essays, my adult nephew graduating at 17 and only because of an August birthday, both of my parents having masters degrees they earned on scholarships they were given due to their own strong writing, etc and now my niece is skipping a grade and my nephew is averaging well above his grade level and likely will skip a grade too. So I said something about being a family of smart kids and my mom more or less went "well one of my kids isn't very bright" and then looked hard at me.

I'm the only college drop out of my siblings, and with a worse gpa. It's also not the first time she's called me stupid but normally not in so many words or out of left field like that so it cut pretty deep especially considering all the other bs I'd been putting up with since arriving.

I voiced discomfort with what I had (correctly) assumed she meant as a joke, which turned into an argument, which made me have the realization that this is not my home and has not been my home in some time and in fact the reason my mental health improved rapidly when I left is because I got away from her and all of her nasty little comments she doesn't think are a big deal and now I'm having a panic attack and oh- this is a trauma response. I am back in the same house, the same bedroom, the same situation, and I am being triggered, and I am having a trauma freak out, and it has been a very long time since this place and these people have been anything but detrimental to me.

TO HER CREDIT she did come into my bedroom late that night and stated that she couldn't sleep because she felt awful because clearly she seriously misstepped and did not actually mean to hurt me this badly but at that point the damage was done. We talked it out and then we both cried ourselves to sleep in our respective bedrooms and then I woke up with covid the next day and drove the 5 hours back home so I could access healthcare in my state with my state insurance.

And I don't think I will ever go back there willingly, at least not to stay overnight. I'll come up with a reason that I have to stay at a hotel or something.

So anyway long story short the issue was relatively shortlived and I am now back to normal but WOW that was a BAD night. I have not had a night like that in a very long time.

[rafeskiss]

florida!!! ! ᥫ᭡

pairing: bsf!rafe cameron x reader

summary: reader’s boyfriend cheats on her so rafe plans to make her forget all about him by taking her to florida.

warnings: no smut, not much, rafe laces someone’s cocaine with fent, protective rafe, i don’t really know 😊

authors note: FIRST RAFE POST!! i know ive only ever posted for sturniolo tumblr but id like to preface my account isn’t solely for them, and i will be posting content for other fandoms as well!

love left me like this, i don’t want to exist so take me to florida

when naive!kook!reader and her boyfriend, a good-for-nothing fuck boy, one to a worse degree than her best friend rafe was, broke up… rafe was more than happy to finally step in.

it was as simple as that rafe couldn’t let that man sleep peacefully knowing that he broke his poor best friend’s heart.

when you showed up at tannyhill, your big doe eyes all teary eyed and smeared mascara running down your cute cheeks, rafe already knew it had something to do with that little boyfriend of yours.

secretly, he had been waiting for this exact moment. he had been waiting ever since you told him that one of the boys he plays golf with asked you on a date. you were just too sweet for him. for any of these boys on the island. no, you needed someone who could really protect you and make you feel feminine and comfortable, something these boys couldn’t do except for him. he knew you better than anyone and had much more to give you than everyone else, but being the naive girl you are, you didn’t see past the friendship.

“aw, baby.” he frowned before embracing you in a tight hug. you wrapped your arms around his neck, silently crying into his arms.

your voice broke, “he cheated on me,”

rafe’s jaw clenched, but he wasn’t surprised. not one bit. “ ‘m so sorry.”

he didn’t ever directly warn you about boys like him. he couldn’t ruin the happiness you had when that guy started showing interest in you.

this wasn’t even supposed to happen, actually. you weren’t aware of this, but rafe may or may not have told every guy who ever expressed interest in you to fuck off. a simple hands-off rule. he’d threaten them, say that if they so much as talk to you, they’d wish they didn’t. only one person dared to test that rule. he started flirting with you and commenting on your instagram pictures. rafe solved that problem quickly and easily by lacing his next bag of coke with a little bit of fentanyl. he didn’t die. it taught him a lesson. taught mostly every boy on the island a lesson, except for your now ex-boyfriend.

so he couldn’t put fentanyl in this fucker’s coke this time because the boy never mentioned you to him. they played golf regularly, never speaking of you. and then one day, rafe picks you up from your house to take you shopping and you excitedly tell him how one of his friends followed you on instagram and asked to take you out. that guy knew what he was doing.

he maneuvered the hands-off rule because he knew rafe would never let it happen.

after a few minutes of consoling you, rafe broke the silence. “y’wanna go to florida?”

you stopped crying, pulled away from the hug and peered up at him. “what?”

he grinned, “i’m serious. let’s go to florida, yeah?”

you shook your head, “that won’t fix anything, rafe.”

truth be told, rafe believes money can in fact buy happiness. and he’d spend every last dime in his pocket if it meant you forgot all about that stupid boy and became happy, especially if it meant you were happy with him.

“it’ll be fun. lemme show you a good time, promise you’ll forget all about him. it would be good for ya to at least get out of the obx.”

“why florida?” you asked, sniffling and wiping a tear. rafe lifted up his shirt, revealing his lower toned abdomen, and wiped your mascara off your face, wiping your nose too. something only dad’s do for their young daughters, and rafe too, you guess.

he shrugs, “why not? we gotta place there. nice place right on the miami coast. just a change of scenery, s’all.”

so the next day, rafe pulled into your house’s driveway. you stood by the front door, a suitcase next to you. rafe smiled as he got out of his car, “only one suitcase?”

“you think i need more?” you asked in a surprised tone.

he shrugged, “i just planned a couple things snd you might need more than a couple outfits for ‘em. s’all good though, we can buy you some more when we get there.” he said while grabbing your pink suitcase effortlessly and placing it in the backseat of his car.

you were completely unaware of rafe’s true intentions by this out of the blue trip to florida. you didn’t think anything of the sweet things rafe did for you. he was your best friend, and he looks out for you. he just cares for you, like any friend would.

once you arrived in florida, being taken there by the cameron’s private plane, the first thing you did was get a fancy facial from a very luxurious med spa. one sarah went to anytime their family visited florida, which is why rafe knew of the place. he paid for you to get the longest, most expensive, and best treatment there was.

afterwards, you guys went out to dinner at a small restaurant on a dock.

you thought he was just being sweet.

you thought he was just being sweet when he bought everything you laid your eyes on in small boutiques and even large luxury stores like chanel and tiffany.

and rafe’s plan worked. by the first four days, your ex’s name never came out of your mouth. the only name on your lips was rafe, and his next plan was to keep it that way.

all that’s left to do was convince you there was someone better for you out there. and that someone was him. you didn’t see it yet, but you would by the end of the trip. he would make you his.

[jennaaswife]

*Sigh* Wednesday is trending again, which means that the kiddos out there are gonna start drama again. Please just stop; this is one of the reason why the show was called cringe a year ago and people left the fandom.

1- You have the right to ship Wyler et Wavier. This is your opinion, your preference and I respect it. So why, mainly Wavier shippers, are suddenly back at attacking Wenclair shippers for no reason at all on Tumblr, Twitter and basically every single social media? What are you, 12? Is this hard to respect people's opinions???

2- Stop shipping Jenna and Emma. I'm almost certain this is the reason why we can't tag Emma on Instagram anymore. Ever since the Chappell Roan videos got out, a lot of people have made weird comments saying that they kissed or that they were on a date. Just stop. Stop shipping real people, or do it but silently. All of this is making them very uncomfortable and it's just direspectful to assume things like that. We just got them back, don't make Jenna delete Instagram again and make Emma disappear from it once again.

This just needed to be said. Just be respectful, it's not that fucking hard, goddamit. And when I mean respectful, I mean towards the fans AND the actors. Don't make Wednesday cringe again. Stop being kids and attacking other fans for absolutely no reason because you can't accept the fact that they don't ship your ship. And stop using the fucking Wenclair hashtag to say trash about them, this is getting annoying.

This is also addressed to, like me, Wenclair shippers. You should respect Wyler and Wavier shippers as well; don't give the bad example. Everyone is free to ship the characters they want, and this without any drama or violence. Just be kind to each others, it's not that hard.

Thank you for reading this. If you disagree, then just shut the fuck up because I don't have time to lose arguing with immature people on social media. I'm writing this as a reminder to respect Jenna and Emma and the fans, that's all. Y'all seriously needed a reminder.

Also, don't make Tumblr toxic. I already left Instagram and Twitter because people in here are the most toxic ever, I always loved Tumblr because people were nice, but for a week mad Wavier shippers started posting and insulting which is extremely annoying. Oh, and I also had to turn off my anonymous asks because I got very weird questions from probably bots. Don't make this app bad too, it's basically the only good one left with Pinterest.

I suppose that's all. Goodnight. And don't fucking come at me for saying this, because everything I said in here is true and I am just trying to remind people to be nice, not cause any more drama. If you say something mean here, you will be blocked immediately because, as I said, I don't have time to lose arguing with kids who can't respect an opinion.

Goodnight 🤍☮️

[damnfandomproblems]

Fandom Problem 9217 generated a lot of replies so I'm going to round them all up in one spot here. And because I see this as being one that could potentially go on forever, I'm going to ask that all replies be handled as comments on existing posts.

Anon:

Hi, OP here. I'm from Canada, dude. Nice try though.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

Lol, of course the one person who assumed the submitter is American when the entire world has kinda been blowing up the last few years is the person with the EXACT poll-type scam posts that the submitter is talking about. Friendly reminder: people have problems with their own countries even if they aren't in the US. Also: this problem was probably submitted like a year or two ago, before the total firestorm in the US with the orange turd. Also: Your bigotry is showing.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

Going down the rabbit hole in the post notes here is a trip. A person in the comments assumes OP is from the USA, then you go to their blog where (apparently) OP tells them they're from Canada, then the person goes on a rant: are you fucking shitting me. for real? you think ‘actually, im not from the us im from canada 🤓☝️’ is a good reason to let palestinians die? canada? you think being canadian is worse than being palestinian? you think you’re suffering more? canada? oh my god poor you, it’s so hard to be canadian. fucking canada?? canada???? This is like quintessential tumblr. It sounds like the Miette meme. I'm dying. I don't know whether I should cry too.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

Did the person commenting in 9217 forget their meds or something. Unplug. Go outside. You're severely grass deficient.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

In response to the "usamerican spotted" comment thread You really gonna call someone else a cunt while being xenophobic towards both Americans and Canadians? I hope you're just a troll, I don't want to believe someone that stupid exists.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

"A xenophobe denying the personhood of Palestinians" is a wild ass, chronically online take for a post that just says they're burned out and don't want to get tricked into reading posts that are, like it or not, usually scams.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

Hi, OP of 9217 here. Since there seem to be multiple people assuming I'm American, I just want to say, again: I am Canadian. Stop assuming everyone who mentions the state of their country is American. Or that everyone who is stressed out is American. Between our maple MAGA, Proud Boys, and racism, we've had a massive radical problem here for years, and it's only getting worse. I've been profiled. I've been followed to my car. I've been threatened with swatting. We have hate groups trying to ban books from our libraries. We have a TFW program that companies left and right have been exploiting, and leaving hundreds of thousands of people without properly-compensated work despite months of full-time searching, and abusing the employees they do hire. We have a healthcare crisis, and you can't get life-saving medicine fast enough. Our cost of housing is through the roof. Even after I found a job, I couldn't afford to live where I grew up, so I had to move back to a province where you're completely isolated from literally everything unless you can afford a car. That shit is expensive. We're threatened with constant talk of annexation from our neighboring country. Everything is up in the air. We haven't seen this much instability in decades. If you think "a Canadian can't be stressed out" for some ungodly reason, maybe because oh, joy, we have free healthcare, which is great if you don't need surgery yesterday and can afford to wait a year in a massive backlog, and a year for a damn referral, sure, that's great. I'd rather be in debt than die. So forgive me, and everyone else who understsnds that submission, for not wanting to deal with more shit. There are starving kids in Africa, there are people dying in genocides. We all know. Forcing ourselves to never take a reprieve from the shit news doesn't help them, or you, it only helps you feel better about your own uselessness, and I'm a pragmatic, not an idiot. There is still an invasion happening in Ukraine and problens in Uyghur, and some of you have been awful quiet about those because all you care about is clicking a button for the current Thing. Miss me with that.

Hi, crap, I'm OP of 9217 and I meant to say Xinjiang, not Uyghur in my ask. Is it possible to add this to that compilation post? Won't respond to anyone else either way, I've said my piece.

[kookiestarlight]

the main reason I left tumblr a few years ago was because I no longer had time in my life to dedicate to writing. despite how busy life got for me from that point I made an effort to try and stay a little longer and at the end of the day if I wasn’t too exhausted enough I would try to do a little writing or planning for my fics, because after all, the biggest reason why I used to write was because it felt like a little escape from life and it’s genuinely something I enjoy doing, however, that doesn’t mean that some days, even with it being a fun little hobby, it can become difficult.

sometimes I feel too exhausted, sometimes I get tired of what I’m writing when I’m already midway and give up on it, sometimes I’m unmotivated and lose excitement, sometimes every idea that comes to mind just seems trash or unviable for me to create and sometimes I simply go blank, and even though I may want to write, I just sit in front of my screen for an hour and nothing comes, and sometimes if I pressure myself too much with it, it can feel like work. and honestly, I work two jobs and the last thing I want is for writing to be a job too.

I’ve really never wanted writing to feel that way for me. the small moments I do get to write now feel more precious to me, because I’m doing it because I truly want to. Of course, if I decide to share my writing and stories on here, it comes with some responsibility to make something good, thought out, unique, fun and enjoyable for others. Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t make the process of writing any less fun, but it does make it more time consuming, planned out and more of task. and it adds on the added pressure of having to have it done and posted often or within a certain amount of time. So due to all the factors I stated earlier, it can be harder to achieve, especially because of my lack of time to dedicate to it. just so you guys can get the picture, I have four free days in a month give or take, even if I dedicated those days entirely to writing, it would still take me plenty of time.

I knew it would be a struggle to come back here and try to make something like a series, because let’s be real, unless I finish the whole thing first and then decide to post it, you guys would probably have to wait a while between chapters, which can lead to you guys getting frustrated, bored, or impatient for more, which I completely understand — I’ve obviously also been a fic reader back in my day lol.

and I also know that I don’t owe anyone anything on here, and that I don’t have to explain myself. because this is something I’m doing out of my own will for free. but one of the other main reasons why I left tumblr in the past was because of insensitive, entitled and rude comments. which I have already begun to receive again.

I know I have changed the release date of my series lines of fate for months. and I truly apologize, my mistake! turns out, I made the mistake of posting the announcement too early when I only had half of the chapter done (which was a breeze and was mostly written years ago) and I though the rest would flow in the same way. (surprise! it didn’t!) but life doesn’t always flow as planned. I also lost a very dear family member during christmas, which as you can understand set writing to the bottom of my priority list.

I’ve had very little time to work on it but when I have had time to sit down and write, I’ve just hated everything I’ve written, I’ve become stuck, and it’s just been a rather slow process, because I’ve been simultaneously working on the second chapter and trying to finish it also so I don’t have to leave you guys hanging too long after I post the first.

anyway, I’ve received some not so nice comments about why it hasn’t been posted yet, and it just really makes me wonder if it worth to open myself up to posting again, which if I haven’t already mentioned already feels quite nerve wracking for me to begin with lol. for some of you it will just feel like excuse after excuse, but all I can do is explain the honest truth of my situation with you, (which again, I shouldn’t even have to) but it doesn’t sit right with me to just let some loser on here call me a lazy ass and demand things from me. It would be nice to see you live a day in my shoes and then talk.

I used to see this happen a lot with other writers too in the past when I spent way more time on here, and it’s still just so weird and baffling to me. I kind of thought things may have changed but🤡 so please, stop and have a think, and try being more considerate the next time you‘te about to leave anyone a mean message hiding behind anonymity. you’re entitled to your opinions but you’re never entitled to ruin someone’s day.

the first chapter is done and coming and I’m working on the second one. I won’t give any more updates and my anons will remain off until I post the first chapter. and I just want to say the response to the announcement of lines of fate has been insane to me!!🥹 thank you to everyone that’s been sweet, has shown excitement for my stories and has helped me stay motivated in this process, you’re truly stars ⭐️🫶🏻

besitos 💌

[mooncello]

2024 in review

Alright, there's a handful of hours left in 2024. So many of you have tagged me which is lovely. Hi. So much brilliant and amazing work has been created and shared this year. As well as countless kind comments and fic recs and supportive messages and general community.

My roundup will be a little different. I'm not gonna focus on numbers or word counts. Instead, I thought I'd focus on the most unexpected and delightful surprise that happened this year: Dev and Niall.

I never dreamed that these two would show up in a Snowbaz fic (lost boys) and I'd become so enamored with them that I'd no longer want to write anyone else in the fandom. Ok, this is a slight exaggeration but only just.

So, here is my 2024 by way of Niall and Dev:

(under the cut because I can't write short things, even tumblr posts)

I started the year with the posting of lost boys. A weird, dark merging of Snowbaz and Neverland. I hope to finish this fic in 2025.

Here's how Niall showed up in lost boys (Baz POV):

I look up to see a boy. He has an absolute mess of shaggy brown hair, his eyes are kind, and there’s paint on his fingertips. “You seem to be the most sane person here,” the boy says, and lowers himself into the seat across from me in the school canteen. I raise an eyebrow at him. “Looks can be deceiving. Maybe I’m completely mad.” He laughs at this. A soft, gentle sound. “Most artists are. I’m Niall.”

And Dev:

There’s the solid thump of a hand against my shoulder and the dramatic collapse of tall, muscular limbs into the seat beside me. “My favourite nerd. How’s it going, cuz?” Dev flashes his white, perfect teeth at me before snatching my remaining bourbon biscuit. His fingernails are painted turquoise today, his dark hair is swept away from his face, and he’s wearing eyeliner. The bastard looks amazing. Despite being cousins, we never really hung out as kids. Always kept to different social circles. Which is to say Dev constantly had a roving pack of friends, and I had nobody (save for the lost boys in my dreams). But when I got outed this past spring, Dev decided to take a more active presence in my life. He even convinced me to join the football team with him. He’s charismatic and popular in his own way, and so unabashedly and loudly himself that even the nastiest bullies don’t bother him. It's been nice, having Dev in my life. Even though it means I now deal with his chaotic, abrasive personality all the goddamn time.

Around this time, I was also drafting my COBB tripping over stars, a celebrity AU with skateboarder Simon and model/influencer Baz Pitch. (I have no idea if I'll finish this one. I want to; we'll see.) Niall and Dev showed up again in very different roles. This time Niall was a competent asf talent manager, and Dev his in-the-background supportive partner. I love this Niall so much. He's so feisty.

There's the clicking of smart brogues across the wood floor, and Niall appears in my line of vision, his gold-brown eyes blazing at something behind me ... As both my talent manager and personal friend, Niall is a goddamn force. And people think I’m the ruthless one. (Maybe on the runway. No, definitely on the runway. But everywhere else it's Niall Niall Niall.) “Sweetie, what’s the problem?” I ask Niall. I’m still slouched in the ancient chair, my arse so numb I’ll need an extra-long bath tonight, and I feel the beginnings of a migraine coming on. “I’m fixing it,” Niall returns crisply, and I swear his eyebrow quirk is now superior to mine. The traitor. His breath is minty which means he’s been chewing wintergreen Altoids nonstop. Which means he’s either very stressed or trying very hard not to smoke. Probably both.

And here's a fun lil something from the unpublished, unfinished chapter 3:

“Shit. Fuck.” Niall’s fingers are flying across his phone. “Okay, okay, here’s what we’re going to do. Dev’s going to take you home. Wash up. Stay off your phone. Do not post a single goddamn thing. Do not engage with any post, any comment. Do not answer phone calls or emails. I’m going to stay here and get more information.” There’s the muffled clacking of dress loafers on porcelain tile, and my head snaps up to see Dev running down the long hallway towards us. He takes one look at me, and his eyes light up in a kind of horrified-transfixed combination. “Hell’s teeth, Basil. You look like the first murder victim in a horror movie.” He smirks. “Or a really sloppy vampire.” “Can you not,” I growl. My skin starts to burn and itch. I need to get this foul shit off me now. “Take him home.” Niall tosses his car keys to Dev without looking up from his phone. I can hear the soft rumble of guests in the grand foyer through the wall. Niall suddenly glances up, skin pinched between his eyebrows. “No, wait, pap will show up there. Take him to mine. Discreetly.” “You got it, babe,” Dev drawls. Niall returns his attention to his phone, and says in a tight voice, “Dev, darling, this is serious.” Dev rolls his eyes. “I know.” Then he loops his fingers around my non-splattered arm. “C’mon Nosferatu, we can sneak out the rear exit.”

I got majorly blocked on both of these fics during the spring. I had no clue where to take either. I blew up my original outlines because they didn't feel right. Like ... I was way more interested in how Niall and Dev met in the celebrity AU and began daydreaming their story more than Simon and Baz. 🤔

Around this time I saw a carry on prompt on tumblr for a Dev and Niall fic in which they play matchmaker to Simon and Baz. And the seed was planted for more than a footnote.

more than a footnote started as a lark. It was supposed to be six chapters, 12k max, silly, fluffy, ridiculous, not serious. A palate cleanser if you will, until I got clarity on my other two wips. HA. This fic has captured my entire heart, and it is my absolute favorite thing I've ever written. Niall and Dev get to be center stage, and it's been such fun to flesh these characters out.

From Niall's POV:

Dev has always been comfortable in his body. He’s open and confident in a way that makes my chest ache. I wish I were more like that, but I’m sinew and bone whereas Dev is polish and muscle. Half the time I feel like something the cat drags in, and Dev, well … Dev’s the cat.

And:

The truth is: Dev is stunningly beautiful. He’s got one of those faces you want to stare at. Dark, liquid eyes and sharp angles. Expressive mouth. Then you add his piercings and eyeliner and nail polish and … overall Dev-ness and— Like, yeah, I get his appeal. But his looks are only a sliver of who he is. People don’t actually know him, and I kinda hate how much everyone talks about his abs and his cock, and not about him as, you know, an actual person. Because he’s really cool, with wicked intuition and an absolutely mad sense of humour. Underneath all his swagger, he’s deeply good.

And from Dev's POV:

What was I supposed to say anyway? That I’m looking at him, always? That I want him? I’ve had months to think about it, and my list just keeps growing longer. Of what I wish I had the balls to say that night. You should never spell your irises blue because your big brown eyes are enough to make me commit forbidden magic, if you asked. Your hair keeps getting darker each year. So the ginger kid I met at the Crucible now has brown hair threaded with copper, and when the sunlight catches it, I kinda want time to stop because it’s one of the prettiest fucking things I’ve ever seen. Your smile could power the sun. It sure as fuck controls my breathing. You’re real and honest without even trying. And you have the weirdest sense of humour. You make me laugh. You always have. You’re my favourite person. Ever.

Yeah. I love these guys.

And can I just say that DeNiall stans are the best? So many of you have left the most amazing comments on mtaf, and I've enjoyed chatting with you as each chapter's gone up. @rimeswithpurple made gorgeous fanart from chapter 3 and the cutest, most colorful DeNiall friendship bracelet I wear all the time. And @monbons MADE DEV AND NIALL DOLLS. Which I still can't get over. Just last night I saw my snowflake exchange gift from @iamamythologicalcreature who illustrated fanart from chapter 1. I am speechless; it is so very beautiful.

And finally, to get ridiculously sentimental on main: I've loved this fic more than I thought possible, in large part, because I got to know @valeffelees through the writing of it. Words are gonna fail me, dude, so I'm just gonna say that your friendship is one of the best things from this year. HOW'S THAT FOR PUBLIC AFFECTION. Are we puking yet?

a few stray thoughts:

while I love collabs and fests (I had a lot of fun collaborating with @iamamythologicalcreature on lost boys and @shemakesmeforget on tripping over stars), I've definitely (unfortunately) learned that time-constrained fests are not my friends. I want to participate in them, but my brain is very unpredictable and I end up stressed and worried about disappointing people, like my collaborators and mods. As I write this, I'm painfully aware of how very late my exchange gift is gonna be. But I've given my recipient a heads up and I swear the wait will be worth it. 🩵

I feel like I'm a slow writer. Perhaps speed is subjective. I do know that I have so many ideas bursting at the seams of my brain, and I often wonder what my creative output would be like if I didn't have my mental health shit to contend with. I spent entire weeks frozen this year, deep in my cave, unable to touch my writing projects. For someone for whom creativity is essential in feeling fully human, it sucks to have that part of myself unreachable. Urgency is a construct of capitalism so I'm trying to resist that wretched sense that I'm losing time, falling behind, etc, while I still have so much that only exists in my mind, desperate to be shared w others. Fics, original novels, screenplays, on and on. A filmmaker friend of mine gave me the advice: Don't plot it out. Trust the process. And nature reminds me all the time to allow things the time they need. You can't force it. Fuck, it's easier to say all that than actually let it settle into my bones. But I'm trying.

A spot of brightness: All of you. This community. As others have already mentioned in their roundups, truly the best part of the past year has been the relationships. I cannot list everyone but you know who you are. I didn't know I could be known and cared for in this way. I've been writing on my own for a very long time, and it feels deliriously good to write in community. To have friends and betas and cheerleaders, and to be these in return. Like, what the fuck. I'm never gonna write in isolation again.

Ngl I'm heading into the new year with large amounts of trepidation. It's gonna get even scarier than it already is for several vulnerable populations here in the US, including my trans community. But I also have a rooted focus and clarity. I'm gonna keep writing queer love stories. I'm going to nurture queer and trans community in my town. I'm gonna keep hanging out with all of you. Y'all make the world better and brighter, more honest and brilliant. Love ya. 🩵

thank you for the tags: @run-for-chamo-miles, @drowninginships, @artsyunderstudy, @emeryhall, @monbons

@rimeswithpurple, @ileadacharmedlife, @alexalexinii, @best--dress, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

@imagineacoolusername, @skeedelvee

tagging: @valeffelees @blackberrysummerblog @orange-peony @youarenevertooold @shrekgogurt

@hushed-chorus, @whatevertheweather, @cutestkilla @iamamythologicalcreature,

@bookish-bogwitch @thewholelemon @brilla-brilla-estrellita, @larkral @messofthejess