#and to clarify

[hg-aneh]

will you ever come back, or is this an indefinite hiatus/straight up dipping?

i don't know

all the i miss yous are making me want to come back but ik i would just be terrified and motionless as soon as i do

Vent-ish Rant downstairs

CW: Pedophilia, Antisemitism, Suicide, Ableism, Harassment, Bullying, all the important words except for murder basically

i want to fix things in private with the people who hurt me so things can be okay and I don't out them for being wieners

but i also want everyone to know who hurt me, yet I'm aware it's not the right choice to make. social media outrage barely leads to anything, specially where minors are concerned

hell,now that i think about it, considering the fact that they genuinely don't believe people older than them are allowed to have feelings, I don't even think talking would be the right move

it's scary, its fucking scary

fuck. the whole thing started with a person mocking the way i spoke about crowley telling me to stop babying him because i was a legal adult and shouldn't be speaking like that

i had just turned 18 and the person was only a year younger than me

like when it's gone to that point and shit is that fucked up, what can one person even do

i remember i laughed about it back then but truth be told, every single little thing I've been told and that I've listened to coming from the people who hurt me has fucking destroyed me as a person

I looked at my older Discord messages, from before this whole mess started. I was so fucking happy and shameless with my joy, now look at my sorry ass

i just.

it's crazy that i have to go around masking in social media of all places because there are people that take such offense to me being cringe that they legitimately turn into high school mean girls

it's crazy that there are people who claim I'm something i am not because they want to make me look bad in the eyes of their little circlejerking friend groups so they can feel like the hero of the story

it's crazy that empathy goes completely out of the window when an account is big, that people don't see human beings as human beings when they're behind a screen

"just log off lol" i am a lonely shut in motherfucker due to my autism (that, surprise surprise, hinders my ability to socialize), you do not understand what you're asking of me, specially while being in this country and at this point in time where I'm actively craving to kick the metaphorical bucket, at daily risk of doing so, and what basically is house arrest for my own safety and well being

(aka, avoiding to physically yeet myself into upcoming traffic or buying something to actually seal the deal)

thus far I've been accused of antisemitism, pedophilia, being too self-centered (which. bro, the reason why i talk about myself is because it's the one thing i can comment on without being scared of some random person coming to tell me "NuH uH" about it out of nowhere or worse, having their feelings hurt because I don't agree with them 100%), proshipper (which, to those people, the word implies wonderful labels such as "incest apologist" "pedophile" (again) "abuse endorser" among other things) ((sidenote, I'm on neither side on that particular discourse. my friends from both sides know this. I would elaborate on my stance if this wasn't already long enough, but it is, so I'm leaving it at an "I don't care, you do you, but please leave me out of it")), being... mean... because i blocked someone...? (this one is just. that's how the second wave of hate started btw. yeah, because i blocked someone. holy fuck), and there's probably a handful of other things I haven't seen yet. fuck it, there's probably someone out there calling me a zoophile because of my catboy au

My friends who I will not name because I don't want the high school mean girls crusade to get to them, have helped me stash out evidence for all of the accusations and bullying.

fuck, they were the ones who let me know about it on the first place, both actions for which i am eternally thankful for because it means I can defend myself properly should the occasion arise (dios no quiera)

I've already had to make a post on Xitter responding to the antisemitism and pedophilia claims, in which, for the latter, i had to reveal extremely personal information for the people who started this to give me respite if only for a while

and. ugh

What I'm trying to get at with all of this is. it's. coming back is scary. i want to but at the same time I don't think I can take this shit anymore

I wish I had people defending me like this when the harassment started because I'm a spineless little bitch who'd rather talk things out and at least be neutral with people than clap back and tell them to stop being stinky

but what's done is done and now i just gotta figure out how to fix my head before i do something stupid

this is not the full story obviously, I'm cutting off certain details as well as more personal depression stuff to not make this bible longer than it already is

fuck

TLDR: I need a hug, idk if I'm coming back, I probably will cuz I can't say no to people, and some teenagers are horrible

[ghostlymarauder]

so I just learned that some people ship Starfire with Dick and Wally and some people ship her with Jason and Roy, and I'd just like to say I'm glad my girl always finds herself between a black-haired sweetheart and a redheaded pseudo-twink. That's queen behavior right then and there.

[curry-and-gunpowder]

I am not an Odazai truther. I'm an Odazai realist.

Meaning I simply look at the text and apply basic reading comprehension.

[phinnking]

hhhhhhhhh something about the way a sailor loves their captain

[catgirlizzyhands]

RIP Edward Teach you would have loved sweet tea

[lemonicstarling]

hiii if you have a prism oc on artfight, please fill out this form

i wanna attack more prism ocs this year i think <3

[loath3d]

i've just done a re-listen of fourth wing (did the graphic audio this time since i just read the physical book the first time) and WOWIE xaden muse is hella here! like this post if you want a XADEN specific starter?? also, i'm officially starting TOG today... it'll be slow moving, assuming i can figure out how to be able to LISTEN to the books without having to pay a lot of money. i signed up for audible for a free month, but i only get 1 credit a month, and then after that it's like $15.99 or something? and on spotify i get like 15hrs worth of audiobooks a month with premium?? but i think unlimited is $9.99?? maybe?? haven't done a bunch of research on it yet but i'll be doing TOG through spotify since the first few books are under 15hrs in audio, then i'll need audible probs...

ANYWAY, like this for a xaden starter! i'll decide in the moment what point in time for the starter lol if you're also a multimuse, please specify who you want the starter for! otherwise, i'll just pick randomly <3

[ohnoitsjesster]

I don't wanna "find love" I want to become some neurodivergent loser's embarrassing hyperfixation

[dontjudgemeimawriter]

Heads Up Seven Up

Tagged by @oh-no-another-idea

Quietly, I said, “I can’t do the entire trip with the fear of her behind us. If she’s going to follow us this whole time, we might as well go back home, because I’m not leading Alex to her. I’m tired of this. She’s either going to go home with whatever news I dictate, or not leaving Talhuma, and I want to determine that right now.” I took a silk scarf myself and wrapped it around my neck. “If you feel the air change, breathe through that. Do you think you could get that woman out of here?” I asked, tilting my head back to the entrance.

Tagging @dxrlingdaydreams @emelkae @wildjuniperjones @writingbyricochet @andromedaexists @mel-writes-with-her-dragons @jessica-writes22 (no pressure ofc)

[arafantasy]

Don't believe me? Look up the IMbD page of Maggie Robertson. Or, if you don't want to, just look at the screenshot of her most "well-known" roles, shown below.

[sincerecinnamon]

I was feeling a little sick for a moment, and because of my health anxiety and general anxiety, I was really worried, but at that moment, Banana Man started playing, and it immediately calmed me because lately, when I've been upset, I've sung Banana Man to myself to calm myself down-

[stgroversfire]

i know someone who didnt graduate high school and is now running a very successful games startup

i know someone who lived with their parents throughout and after college, which allowed them to buy a house on their own

my boss doesnt have a license due to disability and this place would completely fall apart without her. i am not exaggerating.

i know unemployed people who work harder and have more drive than a lot of 9-5 office workers, ultimately getting stomped down by high competition job markets and crushing student debt

so yes, a very good point op.

Can we stop using "still lives with their parents" or "unemployed" or "doesn't have a drivers license" or "didn't graduate high school" as an insult or evidence that someone is a bad person? Struggling with independence or meeting milestones is not a moral failing.

[sadgirlautumn]

“kids spend too much time on their devices” well what else are they supposed to do? there’s no corner shops with pinball machines in them on every corner anymore. there’s no malls or stores in small towns for teens to hang out in without being suspected of shoplifting or kicked out for loitering. sidewalks are too broken for them to ride their bikes and there’s no bike lane in the street to make it safe for them. i just don’t understand where they expect these kids to go when they keep taking places away from them. and yes having no safe public places for them is what leads a lot of teens into addiction if they end up at a place where people aren’t truly looking out for them.

[nedlittle]

it makes me sad the way cis women are so terrified of and disgusted by their own body hair. and i'm not talking "i have to shave for sensory reasons" i mean i keep seeing videos of women using hair identifier spray on their faces and hands so they can shave the tiniest barely-there bits of peach fuzz that came free with their bodies. hair that serves a purpose and that purpose is cleanliness and protection. i mean when i was in elementary school girls who had barely hit puberty were talking about shaving their arms. i mean full-grown adult women who will have a breakdown if they see two days of stubble on their legs/crotch/ jaw/pits because god forbid you don't look like a perfect plastic barbie doll. god forbid your body that keeps you alive comes with hair that may not be soft and glossy and photogenic. some women are so afraid of having any hair apart from their head and eyebrows that they've uno reversed themselves into six different kinds of gender dysphoria that they can't recognize as such because they're convinced that this unnatural state of highly-groomed capital-informed beauty is how women have always been. you're so scared of looking "gross" or "ugly" or "mannish" that you can't even look at your body in the mirror and recognize what it is. sister you are an ape. why are you so determined to deny your nature.

[ohnoitsjesster]

Every time I commit an act of hubris the gods smite me but I just will NOT stay down