#and yet. and YET.
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friendly reminder that the only thing will would’ve changed about his life was to have more jem in it
just going to go tear my hair out and sob violently into my hands :)
#This was cruel btw cassandra#i can’t even find a gif that adequately expresses how this makes me feel#just screaming and crying in a very feral way#girl😭 honestly just create a dimension where herongraystairs all live and are healthy together at the same time#the fucking bond they shared. they were fully themselves without restraint together for such a short blip of time.#and yet. and yet.#heronstairs#jem x will#jem carstairs#killed me yall#will herondale#tid
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writing his POV in this fic is actually gonna wipe me out ngl
#sal.snippets#sal.cciac#i need him to **** ** to ***** honestly. anyway#ok can i tell you a secret. i fucking hate writing kissing LMAO#viscerally disgusts me irl. but it is so so juicy in terms of tension#so i must power through. for the narrative. definitely for the narrative.#anyway i fear it's always mid when i write it but whatever 💀#trying to find writing advice for this topic specifically is uh. hellish LMFAO#main issue is that like.. for me good smut is detailed. in terms of literal action + sensory stuff + emotional impact#and two thirds of that equation is so hard for me without genuinely grossing me out LMAO#it's honestly so funny. like technically speaking giving head is probably way grosser than kissing in terms of germs#and yet. and yet.
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idk how they manage to make tims beard look so bad, in so many different ways. mister america and season 13 are insane.
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the Vibe I get from the Scoundrel is someone who is too attached to let that last shred of decency inside them die and is extremely mad about that
that. that might be it actually. how dare you clock my own OC for me anon /j /lh
#i DO have a concrete idea of who the scoundrel was before going to the neath + starting heart's desire#she basically completely reinvented herself after A Certain Cricket Game. completely and utterly#and yet. and yet.#ask#fallen london#too attached to their incredibly flimsy last shred of decency to completely initiate their villain arc and yet they're FURIOUS that it Wont#the scoundrel is like one of those redeemed villain characters that join the good guys but complain about having morals now#except like. inverted. they're in their villain era and they're still complaining about having a leftover conscience#they're like UGH. these HORRIBLE things that make me CARE about people. awful. i need them gone forever#*doesnt actually get rid of them in the slightest*#scoundrelventures
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WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS
#I NEED YALL TO SAY PSYCH RIGHT NOW#PLS TELL ME THIS ISNT NORMAL HOLY FUCK#oh my GOD idk why this continues to surprise me im fucking bendy as HELL#and yet. and yet.#i shld take pictures of me doing this#i wanna scare the hoes
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Okay, the Reinforce going down actually got me good. The OST too.
#test#gundamposting#at the start i was like.#these old guys arent going to last long. its gundam#and yet. and yet.
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oh fuck I’M the problem
#i have become my biggest fear: avoidant attached#listen i know everything is cyclical yada yada but did i really have to empathize with my ex. did that really have to happen#like bro he cheated on me w the girl he used to like eight years prior. i’m not supposed to understand why he lost feelings idgaf#and yet. AND YET.#except i am absolutely the fuck not gonna react like he did i am not leading this girl on. i’m gonna go on the second date see how it is#and then if it’s not the vibe i’m breaking it off#AND i actually emailed a therapist abt a consult. unlike mr fucking liar pants#and i am probably going to download hinge because i need to get this out of my system in a healthy casual way#as opposed to talking to someone who wants a relationship with me#mari is irrelevant
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Me: oh neat, cool snail post on my dash, let me add it to the queue-
Cool snail post: "smaller-comfort reblogged "
Me:
Me:
Me: >:o
#gandalf “i have no memory of this post”-ass creature that i am#every time!#there aren't even that many posts in the queue right now you'd think i'd remember something i saw three days ago#and yet. AND YET.#nattering
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The worst crime a version of Jekyll and Hyde can commit is be unappealing. If you aren’t anticipating the next scene no matter how unpleasant it will be then it has failed.
#one of the easiest ways to make it unappealing is make one of them annoying as fuck which is what tgs does to hyde#unpleasant as he was 31!hyde had me wanting to see more scenes with him even if they were revolting and harrowing to watch#because he was well-written and well-rounded and you could tell there was a twisted logic to what he did#all I could get out of tgs!hyde is ‘jekylls annoying little brother that doesn’t like him and farts on his hand and holds it to his face’#like even when I read and liked the comic I was like……. so when is he going to become compelling?#he never did suffice to say#I never got to see the so-called ‘depth’ of the character the fans yap about because by separating him from jekyll you’re denying him depth#suddenly he’s not a psychosexual reading of jekyll but -again- his annoying little brother that always gets away with petty crimes#you’ve typecast him as THAT which is way less interesting than older adaptations do#as much as I like to see hyde be morally complex I also want him to be acknowledged as an intelligent mature adult#even if a very fucked up and emotionally stunted one#not to mention tgs has influenced the fandom for the worse and now it’s hard to find hyde content that doesn’t paint him as it does:#an annoying little brother figure that is more aggravating than disturbing. an unappealing husk#and like. are you aware of how DIFFICULT it is to make THE Mr Hyde unappealing? uncharming? uninteresting?#and yet. and yet.
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someone grab the back of my shirt to stop me from publicly dragging some astoundingly shitty (but also two years’ stale) jgy character hate i just discovered
#i’m going full muppet in my fury send help#salty peak sect 🧂#this book!! is not that complicated!!!#and yet. and yet.
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I need to fixate on some character other than Spider she's starting to annoy me
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re-reading what i posted in june about how torn up my feelings are @ andrew's ending... that same conflict existing when i first finished the book and i still haven't managed to resolve it even now. still strangely repelled by the hopeful note it ends on; andrew's healing leads him to change so much, to such a degree i don't know if i recognize the man in those final pages anymore. oftentimes i need it to end w/ him dead via suicide or the preternatural evils finally getting it's way. but, at the same time, i really need him to live and that unshackled second life. it just makes sense: inherited money, new environment, new lover, new friends, new family, and the chance to do great and vengeful violence unto troth who represents everything that's ever hurt him in life. have to believe those ingredients lead to the light at the end of the tunnel. i need him to live but i always imagine him dead, anyway, guiltily.
#one boy's room‚ summer#me is mark#and in another few months i'll still be in this dilemma probably#getting to inherit millionaire status + move to a completely different state/city/country + in a new house#+ far from parents and everyone from your old life#+ meet beautiful and loving queer friends slash family#+ having the opportunity to just let it all out on an evil abuser#he's living the dream and earned it all#and yet. and yet.#i always imagine him pained and dogged and w/ a permanent unhappiness#even in post-canon#:(
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now that i drew 1 (one) good lineless portrait of thrawn its all i want to do. However i have 2 thranto WIPs that glare at me every time i open procreate…. i will finish them i just Hate drawing Bodies and posing bodies and i Love rendering lineless portraits 😭
#emmett rambles#i even use pose references!!#and yet. and yet.#thrawnposting#i hate art and i love it
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need to return to my oversharing era
#part of me hates using gen z lingo like this#and yet. And yet.#I am sorry#in my defence I could be Worse#My over sharing era needs to make a comeback! lolz 😝#Anyways
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