#anyway this is the last ask in the inbox. thank u anon for this

[theunconcernedembalmer]

Aesop, have you seen that new Hunter? Fool’s Gold, I think he’s called? Thoughts about him?

Can't put my finger on it...

[naomi-nana]

hi ! how does suo, sakura and kaji (of u write him) when they annoy the hell out of the reader (playfully) and the reader doesn’t want to talk to him anymore how do they comfort the sulking reader?? thank u! i hope you dont die

apology (un)accepted! . wind breaker

where wbk men annoys the hell out of you and you sulk. how do they convince you to forgive them?

featuring : suou hayato, sakura haruka, kaji ren.

cw : fluff fluff fluff, sakura and kaji not being able to apologize, kisses in suou(i just like him ok)

a/n : OHMYGOD ITS ALMOST THE END OF THE YEAR—and i just wrote this?!?! this request has been sitting in my inbox for MONTHS... anon u might as well be dusty rn😕😕🙏 also that last part... r u threatening me😱😱

KAJI REN :

seriously? you're upset over that? he knows you're a little sensitive sometimes, but he didn't expect you to be this sensitive. he just put your water bottle on top of the fridge and laughs at you because you couldn't reach it, and now you're mad at him because of it. he's been 'trying' to apologize, but you would just ignore him.

well, of course, since his apology attempt is just him trying to make small talk with you. he's not good with it, okay? he's been trying to get you to talk just atleast a little, offering you one of his candies, sitting besides you, and even took off his headphone to put besides you and act as if he had lost it so you could give it back to him. he was sure you both would talk like normal again after that, but he was oh so wrong.

you were still upset.

after many unsuccessful 'apology' attempts, he pulled out his phone from his pocket and text his friend, kusumi, to ask for advice. he knows that kusumi probably has never been in a relationship before, but he's great at communicating with people. so he could probably help him, that's what kaji thought. after texting him, kusumi told kaji to "just apologize directly and everything will be okay:)".

well, that doesn't help. after reading kusumi's text for what felt like an hour, he finally mustered up the courage to approach you on the sofa and apologize. "sorry, for earlier." you were happy that he actually apologized, but you want him to be more genuine. so you told him that. "ugh, i'm sorry, okay? dont...ignore me like that again, dumbass."

he may have called you a dumbass, but you're 100% sure that he didn't mean it.

SUOU HAYATO :

would immediately notice your change in behaviour, and he would immediately apologize. but, you being you, stays upset for the whole day. he is so confused on what to do. he offers you tea, he apologized again, but you still won't budge. what do you want him to do? get on his knees so you would forgive him?

well, he can do that. when he does, you immediately told him to stand up and asks what he's doing. "what do you mean? i'm just asking for your forgiveness, love." he says, as if stating the obvious. you waved both your hands in panic infront of your face, saying that he doesn't have to go that far for your forgiveness.

"oh? what do you want me to do, then?" he asked once again, and you go quiet. your fingers are trembling because you can't just possibly tell him to do whatever you want for your forgiveness. but you did anyway. not with your words, but with your actions. you lift your hand and use your finger to point to your lips, asking him to kiss you.

his eyes went wide slightly before he chuckled and approached you. he grabbed you by your chin and gave you a peck on your lips. he pulled back then whispered, "if you want that as an apology, you could've said so since the beginning."

SAKURA HARUKA :

oh, oh no. he's upset that you're upset. well, he's not angry at you. he's confused as to why you would get so upset over a simple little joke. all he did was hid your phone under the pillows in the living room, pretended not to see it—although it failed because he's bad at stifling his laughs, then reveals it to you. he doesn't understand why you would get upset over that.

not only that, sakura is the WORSE(with italic and bold) at apologizing. even worse than kaji. he has way too much pride in himself to actually apologize, which make this predicament much worser for the both of you. but of course, since you're his lovely partner, he'd try his best to apologize to you.

it took a lot of practice in the bathroom, and he finally had the courage to approach you and apologize, even though he is still stuttering. but, when he had the courage, an hour has passed already, and you aren't even upset at him anymore. so when he came up to you and mumbled, "hey, i'm... um... s-sorry, y'know. for earlier. i didn't mean to hurt your feelings." you just chuckled softly at him before quickly pulling him into a hug. you tell him that no, you're not upset anymore at him, and that you appreciate his effort to apologize at you by practicing his apology over and over again for an hour.

he asks you to never mention that last part ever again.

naomi-nana. do NOT repost, do not use,(with or without permission), do not reccommend or talk about my works outside of tumblr.

[lyrakanefanaticwriting]

i’ve had these two asks in my other accounts inbox for AGES bc i’ve had no motivation to write, but now that i have an idea of what i wanna do, ive FINALLY decided that i wanna make another fic!!

i love this ask that my beautiful moot @beautifulmusicengineer sent me, and wanted to do something similar to the whole “her-getting-angry-and-burning-something-of-tobias’-down” that wouldn’t hurt graysons family, because i feel like she wouldn’t do that to him, but is still very petty. anyway here’s the ficcc thank u again rose for the ask and also for the anon who asked that i write a fic of grayson and lyras situationship during the game !! 💗💗

Burning Portraits - lyra x grayson

synopsis: after alisa freaks about some NASTY rumours going on with the contestants online that are starting to affect the game masters, she wants to try to set things straight quickly by temporarily moving the contestants to hawthorne house. in the one day they’re at hawthorne house, she expects them to go to a short paparazzi filled gala, just to make sure that the public dies down on their horrible speculations, before resting up and going back to hawthorne island for stage two of the game. all goes wrong when tobias and alice are being appraised left and right, and lyra seems to find a certain portrait the most frustrating thing of the whole event…

————————————————————————

“Do I make myself clear?”

The sound of Alisa’s voice nearing the end of her pre-gala lecture was the only thing that floated away Lyra’s thoughts. This wasn’t like the masquerade ball with only the contestants. This was a black-tie event filled with people who wouldn’t even spare Lyra a glance if they so happened to walk by her on the street. And Alisa had made it very clear: no arguments, excessive drinking, and general “dilly-dallying” was allowed.

This had all started because somehow, photos of the contestants on the beach the night before got leaked. Those, of course, weren’t the problem. The pictures that were the problem, however, were the photos of Gigi’s head bleeding out. They didn’t happen to capture her fall. They did, however, happen to capture the look on Graysons face when he saw Gigi bleeding out in Knox’s arms. A lot of the photos had good quality, and it wasn’t a surprise when Gossip websites and even big brand articles were coming out with speculations of the feuds that seemed to be between the contestants. There was even some speculation about arguments and physical fights between the Hawthornes and the contestants, and how they had a connection to Gigi’s injury, which, if Lyra was being completely honest, she was honestly surprised that they weren’t connected to this. Hawthornes did have a good way of involving themselves in subjects in which they shouldn’t.

Lyra hated that she had to fight herself from looking at Grayson at that thought.

Alisa gave each contestant one last look over, and when she came to herself, Lyra wondered what she thought of her. With her backless black maxi dress, styled curls, and red lipstick, she looked every part the woman that would fit in these types of places. But Alisa’s eyes were unreadable as she continued to skim over the contestants.

“Remember the few things I told you all of you,” Alisa stated, giving each remaining contestant the once-over. “Rohan, no flirting. There were also photos of you talking and very clearly flirting with Savannah leaked in the bunch that some crazy paparazzi somehow managed to take, so how do you think it’s going to look when people see you hopping from one girl to another?” Lyra had to physically fight back a snort when she saw a flash of cold rage spark into Graysons eyes at the mention of Rohan flirting with Savannah. His brothers seemed to be doing the same, and Lyra watched out of the corner of her eye as Jameson whispered a retort into Avery’s ear, and Xander, who had overheard what he said, snorted.

“Brady, you can behave yourself well. Same goes for you, Savannah. And Lyra..” Alisa trailed off as her eyes met Lyra’s. “You seem to be good at it so far, but continue to work on keeping your attitude in check.” Lyra reared back and had to hold back a million little comments that she wanted to make in that moment.

“During those… situations that you made us act out back at Hawthorne House, I followed the ways you told me to react to comments, and only replied when you told me there was an opening. I stayed silent.” Lyra gritted out. Alisa raised a brow at her, before swiping on her phone, and pulling up a photo of Lyra from the leaked paparazzi photos.

“Is it really staying silent if this is the face you choose to stay silent with?” Alisa asked. Lyra couldn’t hold the sneer back this time. Her tongue, yes, she could control, but her facial expressions? Lyra had given up on controlling those long ago. Alisa hadn’t made any breaking evidence that Lyra hadn’t known already. Xander Hawthorne accidentally let out the slightest laugh when he saw that the look on Lyra’s face exactly matched the photo, but he quickly stifled the laugh once he saw that her angry glare was directed at him.

“You only just gave the contestants media training. And any accidental glare that Lyra might let slip would be reasonable anyway. You know the types of people who go to these events, Alisa. Everyone knows that her “look” would be directed to the right person.” Grayson reasoned, fixing Alisa with a look that Lyra was all too familiar with. It did feel good to have somebody who could actually make an impact on Alisa’s decisions defending her. Alisa pressed her lips together, staring Lyra dead on before expelling a breath.

“I’ll just have to take your word for it. Oren and his team will be driving you guys to the event. Let me know if you have any further questions.” Alisa stated. She then proceeded to walk away before anybody could actually ask any questions they might have. Lyra snorted.

“Lee-Lee’s harmless, no matter how intimidating she might seem to be.” Nash Hawthorne interjected, mainly keeping his eyes on Lyra as he issued the statement. Lyra didn’t respond.

“The event is supposed to start in 15 minutes. I can drive all of you there.” Oren, the Hawthorne’s bodyguard, interjected. “The contestants take one car, the Game Masters another.” Lyra mulled on that, and cast Grayson a sideways glance, wondering if he would be considered a contestant or a Game Master at this point.

“You’re going with them.” Jameson said to Grayson, as if reading my thoughts. “You are a contestant now, Gray.” Grayson gave his sideways smirk a hard look before walking over to Lyra, Brady, Savannah, and Rohan.

He stood directly in between Savannah and Rohan.

Lyra did not even bother covering up her snort. Rohan cast Grayson a sideways glance.

“Not standing next to Lyra?” he prodded, his dancing eyes going from Lyra’s to Grayson’s. In a flash, Lyra’s smile dropped, and she and Grayson both fixed him with a wordless stare. Seeing as Rohan wasn’t going to get much of a reaction from either of them, he just cocked his head to the side with a smirk, muttering the words “mean and meaner everybody”.

Lyra rolled her eyes and surveyed the other contestants again. It felt weird to not have Odette with her and Grayson. Catching Lyra’s stare, Avery spoke up.

“You’ll be able to see the eliminated contestants one last time after the gala.” she told Lyra. Lyra knew that she was talking about Odette.

“Did you talk to Gigi before leaving?” Grayson asked Avery, his mind apparently elsewhere. She pressed her lips into a thin line.

“I knocked on her door, but there was no response.” she offered gently. Lyra saw both Savannah and Grayson’s expressions shift. “But don’t worry, she should be feeling a bit better by the end of the night.” Turning her gaze back to us, she started to walk towards Oren, Alisa, and the Game master’s car.

“In the meantime, however,” she added, waiting for Jameson Hawthorne to open the car door for her before slipping inside the limousine, “we should be going.”

The car ride was completely silent, apart from the few comments from Rohan towards Savannah, and honestly, Lyra was thankful for it. At first it was a bit awkward, but slowly it settled into a comfortable silence, one where she could gather her thoughts.

Stepping out of the car with more confidence than she had earlier, Lyra waited for Grayson to close the door behind her before walking beside him to the other contestants.

“Quite a gentleman.” she commented, her eyes finding his as she teased him for holding the car door open for her. He gave her a subtle half shrug in return, but Lyra noticed that even when her eyes glided to the Game masters, Grayson’s were still stuck on her.

“I know Alisa made this event seem the tiniest bit overwhelming, but believe me, they’re not so bad!” Xander offered helpfully. Lyra gave him a pitying look. He seemed to be trying so hard not to make the contestants nervous, and Lyra found his empathy to be awfully endearing. He eventually sighed, breaking the silence.

“Is there anything we can do to take the edge off this event?” he tried, gesturing to himself and the other Game master’s. Rohan held his hand up to voice his thought.

“Whiskey might help.” he offered. Lyra side-eyed him. Xander snorted and was about to respond, when Alisa sidled up to them.

“Be polite. Don’t talk about politics or any menacing opinions. Don’t drink too much, and if you want to voice your opinion, do so thoughtfully. Now we can go in.” she ordered, walking away. Lyra gave Grayson an exasperated look, and he responded with an eyebrow raise of his own, as if saying “this isn’t even the worst of it”.

Lyra had to admit that the place was beautifully decorated. The music was serene and lovely, and the decorations were crystal and gold, giving a lovely touch to the whole ordeal. Lyra couldn’t stop her gaze from going to the huge chandelier on the ceiling, one with glittering crystals and jewels that couldn’t stop her mind from going to the escape room. To Grayson.

Tearing her eyes away from it, Lyra pretended not to feel the warmth coming off of Grayson’s body beside her, and turned her attention to the Hawthorne currently talking and walking towards the contestants.

“Everybody,” Xander announced quite loudly, earning a look from Alisa. “meet Nan!” Nan in question was the Hawthorne brothers’ great grandmother, and, from what Lyra could tell from how she spoke, had an attitude that Lyra honestly liked. But still….

She was Alice’s mother. Pearl O’Day.

Eventually, Nan’s eyes went to Lyra, and Lyra was immediately distraught. Suddenly, she felt about 3 feet tall and 4 years old, and Lyra had to blink to bring Nan’s face to focus.

“You, girl,” she said, narrowing her eyes, “where do I know you from?” Where do I know you from? She might have seen Lyra’s face on some magazine somewhere, but something deep in her gut told Lyra that that wasn’t what the old woman meant. Don’t trust your gut, Lyra begged herself. Whenever she did, it always landed her in trouble. But just when Lyra was going to smile at the woman, the look in her eyes that was neutral before, and awfully pleased as she watched her grandson, subsided. Looking at Lyra, her eyes were different. Colder. Like she was calculating something in her head, and when the fogginess in her eyes cleared—the look in them was knowing.

A coldness settled over her spine, nestling deep in her bones, and Lyra couldn’t bite back the frigid tone in her voice as she spoke.

“You don’t.” she stated, the reply so unnervingly detached that Lyra was surprised it came out of her own mouth. Rohan’s eyebrows furrowed as he watched Lyra watch Nan, and Lyra could tell that the other contestants were starting to watch her too. But still, Graysons eyes were the only ones she went to, and seeing where her mind was, he switched the topic.

“Nan,” he started, prying the old woman’s searching eyes away from Lyra’s and holding his arm out for her to take, “have I introduced you to the event organizers of this whole ordeal? They’re a wonderful couple, and even better people.” Nan hesitated for only a moment, before putting her hand on his arm and harrumphing.

“I don’t believe you have, forgetful boy.” she told him, shaking her head at him. Graysons eyes caught hers as they walked away, a million questions in them, but at the same time, Nan’s eyes were still watching Lyra, calculating and cold compared to how she looked at her great grandson. Lyra swallowed.

“Thanksgiving with the in-laws won’t be so fun, huh?” Rohan pried, his eyes calculating as he watched Lyra. Lyra stared him down right back.

“You’re hilarious.” she said with a smile, before rolling her eyes once he turned his back. But she saw past his jokes. The contestants were starting to suspect Lyra’s coldness when it came to the Hawthornes, and she couldn’t have that. Her secret was hers, and if people found out—

It would take away the one piece of security she had left.

But then again… Lyra’s mind trailed off. Grayson knows. So does Odette. So just how secure are you then?

A fork hitting a glass pried Lyra away from her thoughts, and she watched as a woman with diamonds the size of Lyra’s thumb that graced her ears stood at the top of the curving staircase. She made an announcement, thanking the contestants and game masters of the second annual Grandest Game for coming and everybody else too, before announcing that soon there would be an auction.

But Lyra wasn’t listening.

She was watching Grayson from across the room speak to the woman currently announcing anything and everything’s husband, with Nan by his side. His eyes met hers, and for once, Lyra didn’t look away. She tried to read the message in his eyes, but he looked away, his hand tightening on Nan’s arm. My father and getting him justice may be dear to me, but his family is dear to him as well, Lyra thought. For once, all she wanted was her feelings to not be confusing. She hated that the hurt in her heart lingered more nowadays, and hated even more that she believed in the depths of her soul that Grayson’s hands could carry some of that hurt for her. If she’d only let him.

Unfortunately, giving permission for something as trivial as that, to a person with a last name as his, wasn’t as simple as one would think.

“Let the auction begin!” The woman finally finished, raising her glass and getting cheers from the crowd. A tap on her shoulder made Lyra turn around.

“C’mon kid, your seat is over there.” Nash Hawthorne told her, his eyes searching hers with a calmness that seemingly was Nash Hawthorne. But there was something underneath that, something that told Lyra that he had noticed the entire situation that went on between her and Nan— and was curious as to why it happened. Too bad curiosity killed the cat, Lyra thought, not willing to give the Hawthorne more than he already knew.

“Thank you.” she told him, with a polite—and absolutely fake—smile. Nash held her gaze for only a few seconds more, his eyes searching, before his expression shifted and he gave her a small nod. Nash turned around on his heels and started walking, and Lyra followed him, her pace quickening to match the cowboys long strides.

With her luck, Lyra’s seat was right in between Jameson and Xander Hawthorne’s. They were already sitting down, and, once he saw her approach, Xander’s eyes lit up. She sat down in her chair, and he immediately turned to face her.

“Pst, Lyra.” Xander stage-whispered, something lingering under the enthusiastic look in his eyes. Lyra turned to face him and dipped her head as his signal to keep talking. He took the opportunity immediately. “I remembered you saying you liked chocolate at the ball, so I snagged you some from the dessert table!” Lyra’s eyebrows shot up. Xander took a napkin out of his suit pocket and unwrapped it, revealing 4 squares of chocolate. Milk chocolate. Lyra quirked a brow at him.

“I’m more of a dark chocolate person.” she told him. He immediately groaned.

“Your taste in desserts are heinous and you deserve to be sent to jail.” he stated dramatically, taking a square of chocolate and popping it into his mouth. Lyra snorted at his reaction, and was about to reply when a man walked up onto the stage.

“I hope you are all ready, because the auction is about to commence. Stay seated and raise the paddle located under your seat to place a bid. Our first item of the night is a state of the art violin, crafted by….” The man’s words were repetitive and boring as he continued to drone on, revealing different objects and emotionlessly watching people bid ridiculous amounts of money on them. Lyra’s facial expressions were downright heinous when a measly metal watch went for over $35,000. Beside her, Jameson Hawthorne smiled.

“Auctions truly are something to behold,” Jameson told her. “A fool and his money during one are soon parted.” Lyra resisted the urge to roll her eyes. God save her from proverbs talking and over dramatic Hawthornes.

The auction seemed to be going smoothly, and all was well, till the lights dimmed suddenly and a spotlight was overcast onto the next item. It seemed to be a portrait, but there was a cloth of some sort thrown over it. Lyra furrowed her brows, and was just going to ask Xander what that was about when a waiter walked by and, without asking her, handed her a cup of champagne. When Lyra looked around, she realized that everybody was now holding a glass. She craned her head to look at Grayson seated behind Xander, but he didn’t seem to know what was happening either.

“Our next item is by far the most important of the night, and I would like to say the most special, as it was painted for two very special people.” Again confused, Lyra turned around again to meet Graysons eyes. He raised a brow at her, and his lips lifted by the slightest bit. Lyra huffed a breath at him. He looked like his expression was going to shift, but then he looked up.

His slight smile dropped.

Hearing a few ooh’s and ah’s from the people around her, Lyra turned around, and then immediately froze.

“Here is a portrait of Tobias and Alice Hawthorne, painted in the lovely couples honour.” The man stated, his voice proud. Lyra’s breath hitched. Tobias and Alice Hawthorne. Lovely couple. Honour. What honour did those two have? And why did seeming them, up on a mantle like that, make her want to crumble into a million pieces so badly? Everybody stood up, and Lyra sucked in a sharp breath before standing too.

“Before we bid this piece off, I would like to give a toast to the unfortunately deceased couple.” He raised his glass, and, one by one, everybody’s glasses raised. Except for Lyra’s. Jameson’s intruding eyes were watching her, and she could tell that everybody else was too. She could especially tell that Grayson’s were too. Raise your glass, she told herself. Yet still, she stood there. Frozen.

“Tobias and Alice Hawthorne were, without a doubt, the most generous and caring people this world could find.” The auctioneer stated, compassion in his tone. Lyra’s legs started to feel wobbly. “No matter what, they have been there for the big and the small, the rich and the poor, in every way possible. Whether that is fundraising, charities, or any other act of kindness that the two have shown this world, their undying support and kindness has always been evident.” Yes, Lyra thought, a numbing anxiety coursing through her veins, their support.

“So I dedicate this piece to the two, and hope that everybody can feel the love that I do just from looking at them. To Tobias and Alice Hawthorne,” he said. “The absolute best of us.” Those last few words rung in Lyra’s mind, sticking onto her like damp clothing sticks to your body. Everybody in the room started repeating those words. Everybody but Lyra, of course. She couldn’t stop staring at the two, staring and wondering if nobody in here knew just how horrible they could be when their kindness ran out.

And, once she could call to name the familiarity of Tobias Hawthornes eyes, she could no longer stand it.

“I have to use the washroom.” she breathed mid-toast, her glass the only one lowered and her breathing sped up as she rushed past Xander to the hall. Passing Grayson, she met his eyes and her heart squeezed from the familiarity. Tobias Hawthornes eyes. Grayson’s. One and the same. She squeezed her eyes shut and looked away, not allowing herself to turn back to see his face no matter how much she wanted to as she burst through the gala doors and out into the hall.

Her breathing only quickened once she reached the hall. How, just how could they be praised like that? How could they be considered kind and generous, and how could a whole room of people agree?

Because they didn’t have to find out how cruel a man and woman like Tobias and Alice Hawthorne can be, Lyra answered herself. It was so simple. They were rich, so they didn’t know how Tobias and Alice really treated the poor. Lyra felt sick. And then, once she reached the bathroom, looked in the mirror, and saw her father staring back at her? She felt angry.

She wasn’t going to cry in the bathroom the rest of the night. And even when her brain was yelling at her not to do anything rash, Lyra ignored it anyway, walking gracefully back towards the gala doors. She ripped them open and walked inside, going to her seat and trying her best not to meet Grayson’s eyes as she did. He’s really not going to like what she’s planning to do.

“Everything okay?” Came a southern voice from behind her. Lyra turned around to see Nash staring at her, his eyes not kind, but piercing as he looked at her. She realized then that Brady, Rohan, and Savannah were doing the same. But Grayson’s eyes? They were the only ones who Lyra had to fight back the urge to look to. He was the only one who she had to fight back the urge to look to. She smiled at Nash, and she could tell that Grayson knew it was fake.

“Everything’s fine.” she told Nash Hawthorne, turning around before he could poke around her brain anymore.

The rest of the night was fine. There were no more mentions of Tobias and Alice Hawthorne, except for a few compassionate murmurs here and there from people who just found their portrait oh so lovely, and Lyra could tell that Alisa was going to get them to leave very soon. The auction had ended a while ago, and the rest of the gala was reserved to talking and a bit of dancing, with waiters carrying handheld food and drinks everywhere. But still, Lyra couldn’t pry her eyes away from the portrait. That was, until, she felt a tap on her shoulder. When she turned around, she saw that it was Grayson.

“Care to dance?” he asked her, holding out a hand. Those three words brought her back to the masquerade ball, and Lyra barely nodded before Grayson pulled her away to the other 10 or so dancers, taking her hand to do so. Lyra felt the heat from his hands spread to her neck, and she reminded herself that they were just holding hands.

But later, her mind would force herself to reminiscence on the feel of his hand gripping hers.

“The portrait,” he said, once they were dancing softly, much more different from how they danced at the masquerade ball.

“The portrait.” she confirmed. He set his lips in a straight line. There was silence between them, until Grayson spun her closer. Lyra was distraught for a moment, until she realized that this dance was meant to be slower.

That, like all the other dancers, Lyra’s head was supposed to be barely touching from his chest. She turned her head in chorus with the other dancers, and Grayson brought her body closer to his chest, before the dance continued. Lyra sucked in a sharp breath.

“I’m sorry about your great grandmother.” she finally said. He raised a brow.

“Sorry about the way you talked to her?” he asked. Lyra set her jaw. He wasn’t going to get more from her than that. He smiled then, this one less discreet and small as all his others.

“Well, as simple as that apology may have been, I do acknowledge it.” he stated. Lyra rolled her eyes.

“Thank you for doing me that dire favour. How can I repay you for your acknowledgement.” she deadpanned. His eyes lingered on hers, and Lyra wondered for a moment if he said things like that on purpose, just to get a reaction from her. Behind him, she could see the portrait. Again.

Grayson knew what she was thinking of once her facial expression’s hardened.

“They don’t know the real him,” he started. Lyra was surprised. She’d never heard those kind of words come out of Grayson’s mouth. Not about his grandfather. “They don’t know that he’s not as generous and caring as they think he is. And they definitely don’t know Alice.” Lyra paused. Here he was, admitting his grandfather, the one who he looked up to all his life, was a complete fraud. And yet, Lyra couldn’t agree with him, because she couldn’t further hurt him.

“You didn’t exactly know your grandmother, either.” Lyra said, moving away from the topic of Tobias Hawthorne. Grayson’s eyes hardened.

“No. I don’t.” Grayson’s eyes were distant. Then, he spoke.

“Maybe she had just as hard of a life as the old man did.” Grayson said, his eyes soft as the dance slowed to a crawl. Lyra looked back at the painting, and made a face. If her father’s death had told her anything, it’s not to feel sympathy for Alice Hawthorne.

“Maybe she was an ass.” Lyra bluntly stated. He gave her a look.

“I am still here, you know.” he told her. She shrugged at him, and pulled him off the dance floor. Still, his eyes went back to the picture. “And looking at it gives me an…. odd feeling. I know he was the only parental figure I had, but I don’t think I want to look up to a man like him anymore.” Lyra looked to him with soft eyes. Softer than they were before, that’s for sure.

“Well, who knows. Maybe you won’t even have to see the thing anymore.” she said with a haughty look at the portrait. And with those words, she knew what that portrait needed.

One last finishing touch.

Finally, the gala had been emptied, and everybody had left. Even the event organizers had went outside to catch up with some friends.

But the contestants? They were all in a separate room, still in the building that the gala had taken place in. We were all getting talked to by Alisa, Lyra especially, about our behaviours at the gala. And, once she couldn’t take it anymore, Lyra got up, asked to use the restroom, and left.

Now that she was gone, she could go back to the gala.

To the portrait.

Slipping inside, Lyra made a mental note of where each and every single one of the cameras were. There were only 4 in the entire room, and, luckily enough, none of them were where the portrait was. That meant that as long as she was out of the cameras sight, nobody would see her. Still, Lyra had to remind herself that she had to be smart about this, and even though she felt angry and like she wanted to destroy something, she couldn’t let her emotions take ahold of her like they always do.

From her safe spot, she eyed the portrait still hanging on the stage. They must be waiting to mail it to the person with the highest bid, Lyra realized, her jaw taut. Then she eyed the small closet in the back of the room, close to where she was.

Walking carefully so that no cameras saw her, Lyra opened the door to the closet and stepped inside. She looked through every shelf, seeing only cleaning solutions, and was about to step out when she saw a bottle of something.

Something flammable.

Lyra looked at the bottle of acetone with a deep anger lingering in her. Then, she spotted a jacket. Shoving her hands through the pockets, she pulled out a box of cigarettes from one…

And a lighter from the other.

Lyra’s mind began to race as she grabbed both the acetone and the lighter, shoving the door open and, in quick yet careful movements, made her way to the stage.

There weren’t any cameras pointed to the stage.

Walking up the stairs, it was impossible for Lyra to tear her eyes away from the portrait. For years they had occupied her nightmares, watching Lyra watch her father kill himself over and over and over again. And apparently, her father’s life was never of value to anybody, because despite it, Alice and Tobias Hawthorne are still here.

Still here getting praised for their kind efforts that were all a lie.

Ripping open the bottle of acetone, she threw the liquid onto the painting, her anger building up as her movements became more and more aggressive. Then, she ripped open the cap of the lighter. She was about to flick the flame on and bring it towards the painting, when something stopped her.

When those icy blue eyes in her memory stopped her.

It became harder and harder to believe that she hated a man like Grayson when he was good, far too good to be a Hawthorne. Just burn the damn portrait down, Lyra told herself. But a part of her felt that to burn it down was to betray him.

And Lyra knew that every part of herself rebelled at even the thought of that.

His eyes. Lyra remembered how they looked when she ran out of the gala a mere hour earlier. They were cold, and, even though she could hardly tell from his icy exterior, grieving. She couldn’t continue to fight the line between doing what her father probably would have wanted her to do, and what she wanted to do. Grayson’s eyes were a telltale sign of that struggle.

And then, suddenly, those eyes weren’t only in his memory.

Grayson Hawthorne was standing in front of her, his eyes unreadable as he clutched his hand around one of Lyra’s, the one that was holding the lighter. She hadn’t even heard him approach.

“What are you doing?” he demanded, his jaw tight. The fight in Lyra was struggling to not go out when his eyes suddenly softened.

“You know.” Lyra told him, her voice just as intense, when in reality, her heart couldn’t keep up with this hurt. She dropped the lighter suddenly, and when the numb feeling in her chest gave way to grief, she couldn’t stop a lone tear from trailing down her cheek. The lines of his face that were previously so taut, suddenly softened. His facial expression fell, and, holding the back of Lyra’s head, he brought her close to his body in a loose hug. Lyra couldn’t stop the tears from falling then.

She wouldn’t say a word, an apology, anything, but she allowed herself the privilege of listening to the beating of Grayson’s heart. After a minute or two had passed, Lyra finally turned her head up to look at Grayson. His head was turned down too, and his eyes, unlike hers now so full of grief, were determined. He swallowed, before kneeling and picking up the lighter she had dropped, pressing it into her hands. She looked at him, and at the hands clutching hers in an attempt to push the lighter into them, and her heart squeezed.

“I can’t.” she whispered. Not in front of you, her mind whispered, the words left unsaid. Not when it’s the man who raised you. Still, the look in Grayson’s eyes told her he heard it all. What she said, and what she didn’t. He let his head hang till their foreheads were touching, the movement so achingly familiar to what he had done in the escape rooms.

“You have to.” he softly replied. She too heard what he didn’t say. She had to so she could reclaim the part of her that Tobias and Alice Hawthorne had taken away. Finally clutching the lighter in her hands, Lyra opened the cap, the spark that had went out inside her only a few moments earlier reigniting. With the flame of the lighter flickering to light, Lyra brought it to the portrait with a deep sense of determination and watched as the painting immediately burst into flames. As soon as the flame touched the painting, Grayson pulled Lyra behind her, and Lyra watched from behind his arm clutched around her body as the two melted away.

Suddenly, breathing didn’t seem so difficult.

Lyra watched with an oddly calm feeling as the portrait melted away, and although she knew in her heart that this would never take away the pain of her fathers death, it healed the part of her that was previously so scared of the couple.

Now, they were nothing but a phantom in Lyra’s mind.

Lyra was going to continue to watch the flames flicker to a stop with Grayson, when suddenly the doors of the gala opened.

Lyra heard talking, one of the voices being the same one as the woman that had led the speech in the beginning of the gala, and met Grayson’s distraught eyes with ones of her own.

Grayson beckoned her to walk towards the back stage silently, and the two of them slipped away behind the curtains.

“Where do we go?” Lyra asked Grayson in a whisper. Suddenly, she heard screaming and shouting. Lyra met Grayson’s eyes again. Clearly, they found the portrait.

Or, what was left of it, anyway.

Grayson quickly took Lyra’s hand. “Follow me,” he told her. Lyra’s breathing quickened the second their hands made contact, and she had to remind herself that they needed to go.

He pulled her away to stand behind the curtains. Lyra watched him plan out their next movements, and immediately knew what he was thinking. The only exit they could take was the back door…. which meant that Lyra and Grayson had to somehow find a way to go behind the group of aggravated people and sneak out. She met his eyes.

“You better not stomp.” she whispered to him. Lyra could tell that he was going to pull her away, when she did it for him, seeing the group walk closer to the stage and taking Grayson’s hand herself, darting behind them as quickly and quietly as possible to get to the door.

Once the two made it outside, outside the gala, outside the building, outside of Alisa’s endless lectures, Lyra looked at her partner in crime with a curious expression on her face. He returned it with a look of his own.

“What?” he asked her.

“Why’d you do it?” she inquired. He was his grandfather. The sole parental figure in his life.

And yet he watched as a portrait of that same man and his wife burnt to a crisp beside Lyra.

He gave a slight half shrug, but his eyes were distant. “You had to.” I had to. The words rang true. But did he have to watch?

“But..” she trailed off. “you were never meant to see that. He raised you, Grayson. I was angry. And a part of me will never stop being angry.” She took a step closer to him, her opening up to him being strange and out of the ordinary. But it was Grayson. How many times had he opened up to her for her benefit? “But if I knew you would follow me, I never would’ve gotten the acetone. I never would’ve gotten the lighter. Not because I’m a coward, but because I know you.” Those words bring his eyes to mine, a flash of surprise sparking them, and the sudden softness overtook Lyra.

There was something about the look of the yellow street lamp shining over his eyes combined with the moonlight that made Lyra unable to draw her own away from them. They were…. beautiful. And she could deny it all she wanted, but she knew that he was too. Still, she swallowed and kept speaking.

“I know that family means so much to you.” she stopped speaking to swallow again. “I was hurting. But I wouldn’t hurt you.” Those words were a mere whisper, her head ducked away with something like embarrassment, or shock at her sudden admittance. She wasn’t at all meant to be this kind of person, the one who opens up without a second thought. But what about Grayson’s presence made her forget about that?

Once she brought her head up to look at him, Grayson just stared at her. He stared at her with disbelief, as well as softness. It was something akin to adoration, as he flicked his gaze over her face, but once his eyes met hers again, the look mellowed. He squeezed his eyes shut, resting his head on the street lamp beside him.

“You know me.” he repeated, his voice hoarse like he’d churned the words over again and again in his head and couldn’t pry his mind off of them.

“Don’t I?” Lyra replied softly, not wanting to ruin the moment, but letting her brow raise at him nonetheless. He looked at her like how he did back at the Grandest Game Escape Room, his gaze like a physical thing as it burned onto her skin. More specifically, her eyes, her body, her.

And then, settling on her lips.

He’s just about to say something else when somebody bursts through the door.

“Gray, Lyra, where were you guys?” Nash Hawthorne is in the door way, and once he sees us standing together, far closer than Lyra had realized, he smiled lazily. “Am I interrupting something?” Frustration pulled in Lyra’s chest.

“No.” Her and Grayson spoke at once, stubbornly. Nash’s cowboy smile only widened. But there was something beneath that, the look similar to the way he’d looked at her back at the gala.

“Well alrighty then.” He turned around, and, just as Lyra and Grayson were about to follow him, he spoke again, this time more quietly.

“The portrait ain’t to your guys’ liking?” Lyra froze. Stopped moving, stopped walking, stopped breathing. Grayson did too, but only for a moment before he regained his composure.

“What do you mean?” Grayson asked his brother sharply, the question distantly threatening. Nash stopped walking to turn around and look at the two.

“I know you burned that portrait, Gray. Lee-Lee’s trying to get ahold of the security footage right now, as everybody could hear those people’s screams. I’m assuming that you’re not dumb enough to get caught on the cameras, just as much as I know that this wasn’t for you.” Nash spoke, letting his gaze slip to Lyra as soon as he said you. Lyra held his gaze, her stubbornness unwavering. She wasn’t going to say a word. Nash took a step closer to her. “You know what you’re doin’, Lyra?” He wasn’t going to intimidate her. Not when he had no clue what those beloved grandparents of his did to her father.

“Of course.” she said, her eyes hard. Grayson looked between them with a look on his face that Lyra couldn’t quite place. Then, he looked towards his brother.

“Sinite eam.” Grayson told him, his tone serious. Lyra looked towards him with a question on her face. She didn’t speak Latin. Still, Nash just stared Grayson down, before giving a hard nod. Then he turned on his heels, opened the door, and held it open for Lyra and Grayson. Lyra went in first, but couldn’t shake the look that Nash was giving her as she did.

As Grayson and her were walking back towards the room where they had previously been, the one that Alisa had been lecturing them in, she glanced at Grayson. His eyes were distant. That was, until, he looked at her. They cleared suddenly, focusing on her face. Lyra knew that Nash was behind her, and so she barely spoke under her breath.

“How screwed do you think we are?” she muttered to Grayson. Grayson pondered on the question for only a moment.

“Well, I want to say that it all depends on what lies within that tape, but you and I both know she’s going to find a way to blame us whether we’re seen on it or not.” he replied. Lyra sighed, before she was walking towards the door of the room they had been in a mere 20 minutes ago. A room where the other contestants are now. Lyra was about to reach for the handle, when Nash, suddenly by her side, beat her to it.

“Allow me,” Nash said, with a tight-lipped smile. Lyra’s eyes lingered on his for a moment before she huffed, ready to step in. But Nash wasn’t opening the door. There was a beat of silence, where nobody spoke or moved, before Nash spoke.

“Was it worth it?” he said. Lyra rolled her eyes, wanting to hear the end of his lecture, when she noticed that Nash’s eyes were only on her when he turned around. Not her and Grayson. Only her.

And his words weren’t accusing either. They were gentle. Lyra thought about it. Was it worth it? She looked to Grayson, and saw a truth lying behind his eyes. Today, she saw that Grayson burned to dust the idea that his grandfather and grandmother were saints, and differentiated the idea he had of them in his head to how they truly were.

But today was just as important for Lyra.

Burning that portrait showed her that Tobias and Alice Hawthorne weren’t so untouchable, that she didn’t have to feel like she couldn’t be defiant to any idea of empathy towards them.

And, when she searched her mind for that cool fear that always came when she thought about Alice, about Tobias, about the escape room and all she’d learnt, she couldn’t find it.

She was the daughter of a man who had been forced to death by Alice Hawthorne. Alice Hawthorne ran through Grayson’s veins. They shared the same blood. But she didn’t have to be afraid of that anymore.

Burning that portrait took away her fear and replaced it with something so much more dire. It replaced it with the drive to live a life by her own terms, not one laid out for her by the past.

“Yes,” Lyra finally said, her voice softer than it’d been in a while.

“It was.”

————————————————————————

idek what that ending was i just needed an ending cuz wtf this was so long. anyways im sorry that i had to submit u guys to this trash and i hate it but i was literally getting held at gun point by moots (cough cough @7975348473 cough cough) to post this sooo 😍😍

[tojiscrack]

there’s so many things i love about your fic but one thing i specifically love that doesn’t have much to do with your fic is probably the community. like every person that comes into your asks, including the funny anons, feels like family idk STOP I SOUND SO CORNY BUT YOU GET WHAT I MEANNNN. like 1l-ynn’s (i think that’s her username) hatred for anyone that comes in between megumi and y/n is so funny, THE MALAKAI SHIPPING PHASE, THE RANDOM ANON THAT STARTED RAPPING IN UR ASKS, stanheightis stressing out every now and then about the angst is so real, kickingcat’s beautiful artwork as well as azr3na’s, mercupinesspring’s tiktok page dedicated to liar,liar which i stalk with my private account haha. i’m trying to think of the others but yeah, like the community is so beautiful and i think i’m gonna miss that more than anything when the fic eventually ends 🥲

i love u guys i can’ttttt

liar, liar masterlist here:

tagging everyone you mentioned so they see this ‘cause they absolutely deserve to know how special and precious they are, not only to me, but apparently to you too. it’s so absolutely true, my fav thing about writing the series this past year is the growing community 😭🩵

@1l-ynn @stanheightis @kickingcat @azr3na @mercupinesspring

the malakai hate was so incredibly funny to me bc he was never gonna be a second love interest. like, ever 💀 that’d make this megumi/reader story just be crack upon crack, and ik i prioritise comedy over romance in this romcom, but there’s a limit, yk 😭 and it was just funny to be given a taster of how certain ppl feel about a second love interest being introduced at all before i’d even introduced the real one, might i add

with that, watching ppl stress about the angst tag before it had even arrived (it’s still not here, curtesy of my hiatus 😇) was also the funniest thing ever. i’d wake up every morning with a new ask in my inbox stressing about NOTHING. like a singular person even held enough stress for the entire community, and then some 😭

the artwork i’ve received over the last few months have been collected into a google doc that’s how obsessed with them i am, ready to be printed out bc i genuinely meant it when i said i’d do just that for my room 😋 we made it to a point where we can appoint ppl as LL’s co-illustrators, which 16 year old me, who was drafting the first chapter a year and a bit ago, wouldn’t have even predicted such a thing and i’m so grateful bc wdym they were able to make malakai look good? ☹️🩵

their versions of y/n are so beautiful too 😭

and LL content being cross-posted to tiktok? i felt like an old person when i first saw the page and went through the memes made about my story (it’s like old ppl laughing at their own joke) 😀 my fav is definitely malakai core, and the video with ‘how i want megumi to react whenever another guy speaks to y/n’ or smth like that (along those words) 🤭

honourable mentions too bc these guys could never be forgotten by me:

@shaigimo @princesssparklesprinkle @reinaswrld @cutesolecita @britishfailure @b4tm4nn @reocidal @jelly-fsh @miffysmittens @anonymity-222 @crisis-unaverted @sl1004 @watermelonlover905 @loffagirl @seoups @awriterinthenight @ist0leurc0ffee @biancaackerman @2ukika @julieannah @missunrise @briezy04764 @jvpit3rr @sfmegumi @nappingnai @evergumi @crimsonhallucinations @femtaktsfilosofi @manmuncher777

+ more ofc, i’m genuinely trying hard to remember everyone from the top of my head but it’s a little hard given how fast LL is growing.

this doesn’t mean i’ve forgotten any of you that i haven’t mentioned! just means i got lazy and needed to wrap this sappy response up, but i promiseeee i’m well aware of who’s here and who’s not 🤗 the people above have also had several interactions with me, so it’s easier to remember ppl who you speak to on a daily 🥲

i thank the silent readers for still being here anyway. the LL community wouldn’t be thriving without ur support too <3

also if i’ve tagged you and you wish to not be tagged even in sappy posts, just lmk, i’ll know not to do it in future haha 😧

but anyways… in conclusion, i agree. i can’t wait to return to all my children (you guys) in late june ☹️ the only reason why i’m simultaneously dreading it is ‘cause it means my exams would be here but oh well 😭

k gonna end it here ‘cause this is too sappy ew 🙄 (💕)

[sunniques]

🦊 anon here, hehe. TYSM<3 As one of the anon’s said, we match freaks and I am leaving for it. U are the sweetest. Now I have this other thought, which I’d love if you could help me get ideas straight, cause I feel like I just yap and you write it and sounds beautifully delicious; all thanks to my high hormones and reading the last anon Joshua related.

Him as an stepdad, since the beginning he knows he wants you and he will get you. Mom is lately nowhere to be seen around such a business woman that you barely see her these last few months; neither Joshua but that’s okay it only makes it easier for him. He spoils you, takes you out, takes you with him to his company meetings and parties, hand on your lower back, gives you everything, little touches and subtle words to him to slowly manipulate you “Your mom has me so abandoned, she used to do this, that…” That way until for everyone it looks like you are his partner. And eventually, he starts to give you little pecks with a vague excuse like it’s normal and zero with under intentions and it grows and grows until one day, he makes you sit on his lap and manipulates you to straddle him until he is hard af and you dry hump him (and that is where his corruption kink enters) and he slowly works on making you his little princess and also the nastiest little cum dump. And just one day, to have finally his conscious calm (which had been making him feel bad but like just a 2%) he sends a video to your mom of him fucking you senseless on the bed they used to share and with a following text asking for divorce. Now, he will make you his pretty wife cause you are the one he should have been with for starters.

hey bb. feel free to yap in my inbox all you want because i love it 🫶

also this is delicious so let me elaborate rq

stepdad!shua would love having you on his arm at parties or any work related thing. you’re so sweet and unaware of his intentions, but it just makes him want you more. the kisses he presses on your temple and cheek are sweet and innocent, that’s what you think, anyway.

you get shy and embarrassed when a lot of his colleagues mistake you for his wife, especially because josh doesn’t correct them. when you ask him about it, he just laughs it off saying that it’s because you look so much like your mom and because you two look good together. you like the attention and praise so you go with it, trying to ignore the fact that the idea of being josh’s wife gets you wet.

eventually, you get so used to being cared for by him that when you end up on his lap in his home office, you don’t feel bad. you grind your covered pussy over his growing bulge as he gropes your ass. feeling too turned on to feel guilty, you let him pull your top down and suck on your tits. you’re just helping him out because you know your mom hasn’t fucked him in a long time, and that’s why it feels so good when he fucks you on his desk in every position possible.

your stepdad corrupts you so much that when he records himself fucking you in his marital bed, you put on the nastiest show for the camera.

it’s okay in the end because you’re going to become his nasty little wife <3

[anyamusumesonlywife]

i turn my strawpage gimmicks back on just to be met with the same anon who sent me a death threat last time,, i don’t even have my strawpage linked anymore which means bro is just constantly checking. If you’re so obsessed with me…. come out … show yourself and let’s kiss. Let’s get married even. if i’m constantly on your mind 🧑‍❤️‍💋‍🧑💍💒 LOL

another one was lobotomized dylan (i wish i was joking) And someone saying “nobody sent you R threats” man i wish u were correct but they were Definitely in my inbox i’m not sure what to tell you

anyway thank you for the entertainment! i turned gimmicks back off because i want y’all to say stuff in This ask box because i check tumblr a lot more than strawpage. if you’re sending hate my way,, it just means i’m getting it rather than someone who it might actually upset ദ്ദി( ˶ˆᗜˆ˵ ) so i’m all ears! 💖

as for silly little drawings,, you can still send me stuff without strawpage if you’d like to!

[brklynvannn]

oh my gosh hi! i’m here! i got sick which is why i wasn’t immediately in your inbox after the last few chapters. i dunno where to start!! my heart was cracked open reading ch10 bc my poor sweet oscar 😭 his pain was so visceral that it made me emotional and i had to tell myself “this is fic!osc, irl he’s FINE” and i knew you wouldn’t leave things like that so i bravely powered through.

and good god. the lando pov. you have no idea how much i was looking forward to it and you fucking delivered!! i had so many notes so many thoughts, first–washing lando’s mouth out with soap after making out with that stranger ✋😩 i jest! i knooow he was going through it so i really don’t hold it against him. screaming crying at “why did i leave” i wanted to reach into my phone to comfort him but i’m so glad he has max. everyone wishes they had a max fewtrell! i’m grabbing lando by the shoulders and shaking him!!! you deserve happiness!!! let yourself have nice things!!!

ik you were unsure about doing his pov but it added so much to the fic. i know their feelings are very mutual but it was reassuring (?) to get his side and see the yearning. the double update was my lil treat for finishing my projects for uni so thank you for your continuous updates. like someone else here said, this is my comfort fic and when i was feeling lousy i would reread old chapters while waiting for new ones :’)

i was so giddy at the developments in the latest ch that i kept putting my phone down to take breaks bc i was feeling the same nerves and excitement as oscar. obviously i don’t know any of the piastris, but i think the way you wrote them was so natural and seemed so realistic. of course oscar is basically a dream boy, growing up surrounded by women 😌 that bit about how they used to vacation there and it felt so different then and now it’s his place that he’s made a home in. yeah. hnsndjdk

my brain is still kinda fried so this debrief doesn’t have much to offer except my gratitude for you and this fic. i’m also eagerly awaiting wag!oscar, which i saw you almost had a (loving) mob with pitchforks begging you for it haha. it’s bc we all see the vision you put in our heads 🫵 gotta take accountability for making these boys too soft, too sweet, too compatible, your oscar w/ wag potential thru the roof, lando too easy to fall in love with!

there’s more i want to say about ch13 but look how long this is 💀 lemme just say THE PHOTOS OH MY GOD lan was always looking he always SAW you oscar. you don’t photograph someone like that unless you’re halfway in love!! anyway. this is a monstrous ask so i understand if you can’t respond to all of it and sorry if it’s overwhelming. i just wanted you to know i’m still ride or die for this story 🫶

MY SWEET DEBRIEF ANON 😭 I missed u.

I hope you’re feeling better omg!!!

Listen I know I have put these sweet lil babies through a lot. Especially Oscar, so it felt only fair we got to see Lando’s (not so healthy) way of coping but I ALSO felt the need to scold him for making out with the stranger (and I fucking wrote it).

Thank you so much. I was SO unsure about Lando’s pov so this means so much!! And you have no clue how much it means that you said you were re-reading chapters I WILL CRY.

Your debriefs always have so much to offer are you kidding omg! Truly these have been one of my fav parts Im so thankful to see you in my inbox ugh.

YES I KNOW It’s my fault for the sweet loving mob for Wag Osc and honestly I totally get it. (It will happen)

You are absolutely not overwhelming and I make it point to respond to every point of every ask because people are taking the time to actually read my fic and it means SO MUCH. Thank you so so so much really.

[howelljenkins]

since u have other anons sending you love in ur inbox i wanted to say hi ily 🥰 ive followed you for like 5 years now??? and your blog really opened my eyes to a lot of stuff. like its ok to criticize popular media (sounds silly ik) etc and your college and job applications posts were always really helpful!! im like a year younger thank you i think and i just graduated college last month and now im starting my first full time job next week!!! i sent some asks about taking a full time job with my internship boss and you told me to fight for better basically because i was getting like NO benefits haha but now i’m starting a job that not only offers good benefits but seems to already understand workplace boundaries etc. i have you to thank for that :) also you talking about choosing to be happy kinda opened my eyes fr. like my life isnt perfect by any means but its still pretty lovely and i have a lot to look forward to

anyway i hope you’re healing up alright 💖 sending love

it’s so funny how my tumblr eventually just became an extension of me being the oldest sister.. the entire world is filled with younger siblings for me to bossily tell what to do

[rainofthetwilight]

كل عام وانت بألف ألف خير، يا رب ينعاد علينا وعليكم بالصحة والعافية

Listen, I know I said I'll be back with more cookies, but it's Eid, so you're getting ma3mool instead. Annnd I just realized I don't know what type of ma3mool you like, بس انا عن نفسي بحب معمول أساور so that's what you're getting lol 😅

Anyway,

surprise ma3mool attack

(Just imagine a bunch of ma3mool flying at you; I can't insert images in anon)

Oh, and I just saw your reply to my previous ask, the one I sent on Ramadan, and you said you liked butter cookies. Ngl, I had to search that up, and my first thought was علبة الخياطة؟؟؟, bUT YEAH, YOU'RE ALSO GETTING THAT

(side note, but you're so sweet I'm gonna cry; I'm so sorry for worrying you, girl [also, hi, Finn and Anura if you see this!])

I hope you have a wonderful Eid; enjoy it to the max <333

(one last last thing, expect me in your ao3 inbox soon because I realized a few days ago that I've only read one of your fics [and forgot to comment on it] and that is, in my opinion, a crime from my part lol. So yes, I am coming for your fics)

TARA!!! WELCOME BACK AND EID MUBARAK!!! :DDDD

كل سنة وانت طيبة وبالففف خير حبيبتي ربنا يخليكي، ويا رب العيد ده يكون عيد سعيد ليكي ولكل احبابك انشاء الله!!! 💗💗💗

AHDHJSJSAHSJJA don't worry about the cookies, I think I got enough already 😭 (my parents got like..3 boxes full of cookies from el 3abd, 2 of them are all biscu masr cookies, and they got kunafah with nuts too SHJDSK, we're probably gonna take some with us along with the cake to the family gathering 👍)

ALSO HECK YEAH MA3MOOL I LOVE MA3MOOL!!!!! :DDDD BRACING THE INCOMING MA3MOOL ATTACK DHEJFJWJKFMS

انا بصراحة ماجربتش معمول اساور قبل كده بس انا عموما بحب المعمول ف اي حاجة شغالة معايا، ف شكرا اوي على المعمول!!! :DDD

AJJDJAJ AND THANK YOU FOR THE BUTTER COOKIES!!! :DD بس على فكره انت صح, انا فعلا بحب علبة الخياطة انا كنت فعلا اقصد ب دول، انا بعشقهم اوييي ����

AND AWWDHJDJS YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S SWEET 😭 AND DON'T WORRY ABT ANYTHING!!! whatever reason u deactivated for is immediately understandable!! I just hope you're doing alright and that everything is well!!! <3333

I hope you have an absolutely amazing eid as well!!!! :DDD 💞💞💞 here, have some balloons and flowers from me as a gift <333 🌺🎈🌺🌹🌺🎈🌺🌹🌺🎈🌺🌹🌺🎈🌺🌹🌺🎈🌺🌹🌺🎈🌺🌹🌺🎈🌺🌹🌺

FJDJJSAHSJJ inshallah I'll await your arrival in my ao3 inbox fellow tumblr mutual 💪💪 again hope you have a happy eid habibty and take care!!! :DDDD 💞💞💞

[hopelesslygaysstuff]

That’s the one I thought but I got confused because I didn’t see an ask attached to it so I didn’t know someone had requested it 😂😂 but even still if they’re going to be on anon writing something you can’t really expect to get a credit. Like if I sent in one of my thoughts and you made an entire fic out of it I would in no way think that you stole my idea I would definitely think you got inspiration from it but most of all I would be happy that a thought of mine sparked an entire fic

People really annoy me most of the time anyway with credits and stuff because two people can still have the same idea and no one would be stealing

-K

OK this is the last imma talk about this so after this post we will not speak of it again. BUT! I just spoke long and hard with my therapist about this whole situation and she helped me like chill tf out and think for a minute.

I blocked that anon, they wanted credit for an fic that i wrote completely by myself but were anonymous in my inbox. If someone truly feels like I stole an idea from them and has proof, i encourage them to reach out to me privately so I can give credit if it is due.

That being said, I don't copy anybody's work and everything in my fics is either inspired by anons' requests, or is a completely original idea. I legit wrote my last fic while drunk off my ass at 3 am so...

ugh sorry to rant for so long but also seeing this in may inbox helped me validate myself and calm down so thank u anon!

[fairyhaos]

yena !! i hope u still remember me ʕ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴥ⁠ꈍ⁠ʔ it's the wind chime anon !! 🎐

how have u been omg (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠) i had my exams last month n i have da notifs on for way too many blogs on here so i just uninstalled tumblr instead,,, but im back now (i was about to send this ask sooner (2 days ago ?) but i was a bit scared lmao,,, but i just saw ur post about shua so i had to come and say hi >:3) but wahh congrats on all ur milestones ! before i left i think u were about to start ur 500 followers event ! ! n i think u crossed 1234 already !! and probably even more ! that's supa cool n 'm so so proud of you ☆૮꒰ˊᗜˋ* ꒱ა also i love love love ur new theme *ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ✩

ooo n about finding jeonghan's colour,,, u looked at his pictures to figure out what colour he is ?? that's super intriguing actually. bcs the thing is idk if i have this type of synesthesia,,, im afraid what im doing is just strongly associating colours with people ? like the aspects of their personality play a major role in determining their colour but similar to the process of getting to know someone, it's v hard for me to decide on their colour. for example, jihoon. it's like, , the more i see him the more i feel like i don't even know him yk? for hansol, even tho i don't know what his colour is, i can at least tell that his colour would most prolly be a cooler shade. but for jihoon n sometimes even mingyu i can't rly figure them out? it's like i have options but i don't know for sure. n i don't rly know if this is synesthesia ?? lmdoajdjska i think i should just take the test by synesthesia battery but im just scared lmao </3

anygays i read the rest of your synesthesia posts and wahh, , yena ur just so talented. ur so cool ! ! i rly don't know what else to say. you have a way w words and it's as if i can feel the colors permeating through the descriptions. honestly it's such a gift to be able to share your vivid perception with others and i just wanna thank u for that (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠) i have sm to say about each member's colour and esp shua's but this got rly long so i'll do that in another ask ?? heh >:3

-🎐

WIND CHIME ANON OMGGGG YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I MISSED YOU :<

i hope you've been doing okay!! how did your exams go????? literally i'd be sitting here and just thinking :(( i hope wind chime anon is doing okay in this world :(( haha ive missed you sm

it's okayy there's no need to be scared im super nice!! (i think?) thank u sm for loving my new theme too haha i love it a lot as well

and abt jeonghan: yeah! honestly synaesthesia is a really really different experience for anyone so i like to think of it as one of those sexuality labels. if you feel like it fits, then you're allowed to use it! those tests online are sketchy af anyways unless you wanna pay for a Real and Scientific Test

i think assigning colours to vibes and personalities is very interesting though!! i don't think i could do that haha, personalities have always just been so complex and different for me that a colour just doesn't come to mind at all (i don't think my synaesthesia works in that way lmao) so that's really really fascinating! honestly tho,,, im also struggling w jihoon too and maybe that's bc i haven't spent several minutes just Staring at his face yet but i just have a gut feeling that he's gonna be one tough cookie

aww thank u so much please that's so lovely to hear ^^ that really makes me the happiest oml, being told that people are able to feel my writing and my descriptions <3

aww yess please do lmk what you think of the others !! it's so nice to see you in my inbox again 💗

[umathurwin]

yess i feel like such a hypocrite saying this cos i lowkey do it for kiara and rafe (but based off of what’s actually already there ) but its when the rafia (?) fans are like “i just know they where thinking about eachother the entire time ughhhhhbnnn!!!!!” um sir… no u don’t… in no scene does it ever actually look like he’s distracted or thinking about anything other than the situation in front of him?? like when he was tied up by his sister in a ship in the middle of the ocean i doubt he was like ugh i miss her ohmmggg but maybe that’s just me..

i also feel that way about people who say things like “i know he opened up to her so goodddd over those two years like i bet she knows things know else does” like this entire ship is based off what u think is happening (not what’s actually infront of u which is either clear disrespect or clearly just the writers forcing them on us) ohhhhh myyy god it boils my blood idk maybe im biased

also i was ur last ask aswell sorry im always anon but i have like four backup accounts and 3 devices so i fear you’d be more confused!!!🤗🤗

but anyways i’m high as hell right on (it’s a saturday leave me alone) so idk if any of this makes any sense but ilyy thank u for letting me completely dump all my takes in ur inbox🥰

soaking in all these asks like sunrays. never feel ashamed it’s a three day weekend babey

you hit the nail on the head— dodging in and out of character? filling in backstory where there’s none? girl it’s a crackship came to life. people may not like angsty sexual tension with an implication of a bad history, but at least kiara and rafe give something while on screen!

[thus-wrote-mrs-zeppeli]

HIHIHI !!

It is me again, that one anon who requested the healing reader headcanons

Just wanted to check in !! How are u doing?? :3 hope life's going well!

Also I really need a sign off cause I will probably pop into your inbox more in the future

Think I'll just use D O L P H I N E M O J I 🐬

Because why not!! Dolphins are cool!! (They're kinda assholes but it's okay)

Anyway have a fantastic day/night !!

- 🐬

Hello 🐬!! Super cute haha, yeah I guess they are kinda crazy but they’re also cool, I always thought it was neat how smart they are.

Thank you very much for asking! I’ve been adjusting to a new semester of college, lots of studying lol. And I’ve always had a problem with my sleeping schedule and being super tired during the day so I tried something new last night.

I sprayed a jasmine perfume on my sheets, got a new, much better pillow than my old lumpy one, and then didn’t mess with my technology before bed and instead read a book and journaled and Unsurprisingly I slept way better and have way more energy today haha. I’m glad because I finally feel like I can do my schoolwork AND write today~

How I feel after actually getting a good night’s sleep for once:

How are you doing??

[domjaehyun]

not you responding to my ask and mentioning the ghostface!jaemin Scream ask bc both of those were me LMAO also now that you've mentioned the playgirl and stranger in my house fics THOSE ARE MY ABSOLUTE FAVES and I loooove the people you picked for them it was great visual aid and exactly how I'd want to picture those characters looking if that makes sense? I'm also the anon that mentioned that I love how you carry yourself so to add to that I think its kinda iconic to have this very whimsical bratz aesthetic blog and have both fluffy and dark content. Like it feels like it's for the girls and the gays and those who GET IT!! I was reading a while back the psychology of women enjoying reading/watching dubcon/noncon content and how it's not at all the same as if it was men who were watching it. Something about how women can enjoy a sexual fantasy that is dark because the purpose of it is it's a fantasy and that gives them control over it and that in turn can help heal some trauma. Idk about everyone else but I get deeply affected by any sort of news coverage or real stories that touch on that but I enjoy knowing in the female safe fantasy world we can have a safe space where were allowed to heal in our own way? Hopefully that made ANY sense lol And to answer you writing the characters another one of the things I love about this blog is were literally attracted to the same type of people so I never have to switch out a member in my head when im reading bc I love all your picks🫡🎀 IM SO SORRY THIS WAS LONG OMFG

hi hi hiiii welcome back to my inbox teehee 😁

TBH I KINDA THINK I KNEW IT WAS YOU I RECOGNIZED YOUR VIBES i added the parenthetical abt scream in the last message bc i wasn’t 100% sure it was you LMAO

pl4yg1rl was written at such an interesting time in my life whenever i think abt it i think abt how i used to go to the library like EEEEVERY day (a diff one. not the one i go to now) and i remember soooo vividly that while i was working on the fic i tried to update my ipad and the whole doggone thing shut tf down like an unresponsive, repeatedly rebooting block of metal. and i had to take this bus to best buy which was Fairly Far From Me and then they couldn’t fix it they were like “ur motherboard is fried” and i was like “ive had this thing for like a year and change. it hasn’t been that long” then they sent me to apple so i had to take a diff bus on a diff day to an apple store near me (read: it was not, in fact, near me at all) and the girl fixed it like immediately . (it had run out of storage and didn’t have room for the update but instead of Saying That, it just shut down. poor thing) she restored it to factory settings or whatever like she wiped it and made it brand new and i’ve been w my lovely baby going strong ever since 💖 but yeah that fic will always remind me of the time bc i was sooooo stressed and i was using my mom’s ipad in the meantime which just Felt Wrong :/ and unfamiliar :(

ANYWAY OMG THANK YOU i take finding my inspo photos veeeeeery seriously 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ i be hunting fr just. SCOURING google images, pinterest, instagram, u name it. the things i go through…..reDONKulous. smh my head

omg heehee thank you fr OMG BRATZ…… i never had a bratz doll actually my mom didn’t like the way they were designed she said they were too fresh :P but bratz are such a vibe i should actually lean more into bratz than barbie they’re like . serving cunt yknow? and tbh EYE would like to serve cunt as well 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

and as for the psychology of it omg you just triggered something in me (i love psychology) (i’m literally going back to school for it hehe) i def get that !! like that makes a lot of sense 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ if i may be a bit tmi for a second i feel like for me….. i am into a very specific type of dubcon/noncon where . essentially … the victim is just like . worshipped and the aggressor gets so much satisfaction out of making the victim feel good and cum and whatnot 🙂‍↕️ like … think jav porn but like the . noncon ones . but just the foreplay mhm mhm. good stuff . i almost always exit whatever i’m watching as soon as a dick comes out i’m ngl 😭😭 and if i MAY psychoanalyze myself for a moment (ofc i can it’s my blog lol duh) i think it has a lot to do w like . the like . trauma from my childhood that like . has very much carried into my adult life to this day unforch :/ dark content can definitely be a source of comfort for people, myself included, and i just wish ppl were free to be more open about it without worrying about being judged :/ sigh

tbh i do not watch the news i do not keep up with the news at all actually …. i have a habit of despairing over things i can’t control and so i stopped looking at the news bc it’s almost always. Bad News 😭😭😭 and if i can’t do anything about it…. why do i need to hear about it…..you feel me? but you’re very valid your sensitivity to topics like that in the news like In Real Life is very understandable and honestly i would even say expected….

but yes yes i agree entirely 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ my personal way of healing via dark content is reading about and also writing very twisted takes on being loved/desired unconditionally 💖 (i wish i hadn’t ranted already bc i lowkey wanted to rant abt the specific genre of dubcon/noncon i’m into bc . well. *marge simpson voice* i just think it’s neat. but i also don’t want to reveal too much abt myself yknow? oh well soo la voo ig) it just hits different when the person doing the noncon-ning, like, Cares? about the person being noncon-ned like it’s SOOOO SICK N TWISTED BC SIR YOU DO NOT LOVE HER!!! UNHAND HER AT ONCE!! but they’re like dead set on making the person being noncon-ned enjoy it like they want them to feel GOOD ugh like they’re selfish…. but for your benefit….. but not…. are you following me??

OH PERIOD WE HAVE SIMILAR TASTE 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ LOVE THIS FOR US HEHE and DON’T APOLOGIZE IT’S OKAY I LOVED READING YOUR MESSAGE AND REPLYING TO IT 😁😁

OKAY IM GONNA ATTEMPT TO LOCK IN SIIIIIGH WISH ME LUCK 💖💖💖💖

[openphrase123]

same anon from the other day who has finally read both curtain call and inutile hi 🥹 i think you’re my favourite isat writer now because wow. reading those two fics vaugardian capital c Changed me 🥺🥺🥺 curtain call is everything i could ever want from an immediate post-canon fic and inutile, while just scratching the surface of what the story undoubtedly has to offer, is already so dense and packed full of raw feelings it leaves an ache in my poor maidens heart. i’m so excited to see what you have in store!!! and i apologize if i keep crawling to your ask box anonymously .-. thank u for everything and i hope you’re having a great day i owe you my life

HELP i don't even know what to say to this??? this is so sweet???

i very much just write whatever makes my brain happy but i'm glad other people like it too :3

also do not apologize for coming into the inbox on anon. that is why i keep anon up!! (i'm sorry i don't allow anon comments on ao3, i had trouble with spam there before the last time i did a bunch of fic stuff and i didn't want to put up comment moderation lol)

anyway this is too sweet i need to plug other creator's stuff in return. go read human after all or tidelocked i wouldn't dare compare myself to either of them but it's the same genre of density i think

[allylikethecat]

our timezones are NOT in alignment (booo timezones) so i ended up listening to ttpd first and THEN i read atkh!! the only thing ill say about ttpd is that but daddy i love him was a win in my books and watching the hateful swifties lose their minds over the fact that a lot of the album was ab matty was gold. ANYWAY

todays chapter omg the build up i’m so excited to see what’s next with george maybe (hopefully?) talking to matty and more tragic matty backstories!!?? i love how charli is like “u guys are so dense ofc yall would be perfect together” and omg carly being protective over matty is the best thing ever i just need to wrap him up in a blanket forever

-🥤

Hello My Dear Smoothie Anon!

Timezones really are the worst! Mixed with me not getting it together and posting the chapter during my lunch break like I said I wasn't going to do lol But alas I couldn't sleep last night and woke up late and was rushing to get to work a lot more than anticipated lol

I had a lot of very complicated feelings about the album - but you're right, I'm glad that But Daddy I Love Him was at least a middle finger to the "fans" who were so awful about Matty last year. In terms of the rest of the album, I hope he's actually doing alright like that US Weekly article said. That was like... the perfect PR move and I'm so glad that someone on his side got it together enough to make it happen.

Now on to ACTUAL important things (at least in my delusional world lol) Thank you SO MUCH for reading omg I'm so happy to hear that you enjoyed the new All the King's Horses chapter!! I love Fictional!Charli so much and was like I must find a way for her to be there again lol She just wants Fictional!George to be happy and she is fully convinced getting together with Fictional!Matty would make them BOTH very happy! Fictional!Carly is also very much looking out for Fictional!Matty- they grew up together, she knows what he went through with his mother when they were kids- and she knows a lot more about that situation with the jockey than she's sharing... Fictional!Matty keeps everyone at arms length, even her, and if fictional!George gets past those defenses she will NOT be letting him hurt Fictional!Matty.

Thank you so much for reading and for sending me this ask and just like being all around lovely? I love chatting with you here in the inbox! I hope your Friday was lovely and that you have a great weekend!

❤️Ally