#anyway. im in a rush i have work in an hour and a half and i have to look after my old band director’s dogs before i go
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peachcitt · 2 years ago
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text from thirteen by @anna-scribbles
art by me :)
read thirteen read thirteen it’s everything read thirteen read thirteen read thirteen read thirteen<3 happy thirteen day. have you read thirteen yet. read it again if you have. prepare for your life to be changed if you haven’t.
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stardustcleaningguy · 9 months ago
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theyre making me animate . on an animation course . can one of you guys kill me
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lilac-melody · 1 year ago
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Writing angst is such a breath of fresh air for me...
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gf2bellamy · 5 months ago
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HIHI
so i was just watching compilations on yt and i saw a clip from season 7 episode 23 (i havent gotten that far into the series yet) (also the doctor who convention ep which i LOVE) and this is where i find out that this man KNITS AND KNITTED HIS FOURTH DR SCARF (hilarious bc thats what im literally knitting rn)
anyways..... i was wondering if you could write a fic where reader is helping him put together his cosplay for the con
cant wait to see what youll do :p
-🦔
convention — spencer reid
pairing: spencer reid x reader ( no use of y/n ) content warnings: established relationship and literally just the fluffiest fluff a/n: hiii !! i love that scene more than anything spencer is so cute - i hope you like this !!!
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Doctor Who played in the background as Spencer sat beside you, his long fingers working quickly as he looped the yarn, the half-finished scarf draped over both of your laps. His brows were furrowed in concentration, lips pressing together.
You watched him for a moment, mesmerized. But then, he let out a small, distressed noise. “Oh no,” he muttered, his hands pausing. 
You barely lifted your head from where it rested against his shoulder. “Spencer, you still have a couple of hours left,” you murmured sleepily. “Stop rushing.” 
Your fingers traced absentmindedly over the red section of the scarf that had pooled onto your lap. It was soft, carefully stitched.
Spencer sighed, his frown deepening. “I still have about ten centimeters left,” he grumbled before resuming his work. 
“And you’ll be able to finish it,” you reassured him. “Besides, Penelope is going to be late, like always.” 
At that, Spencer finally tore his gaze away from the scarf, turning his head toward you. His eyes lingered on your face for a second before he leaned in, pressing a soft, fleeting kiss to the tip of your nose. The corner of your lips curled into a smile as you leaned further into his shoulder, letting out a quiet, content sigh. 
“Do you think it looks good?” he asked after a moment, his voice softer this time, tinged with the faintest trace of uncertainty. 
You tilted your head slightly, glancing down at the scarf once more before meeting his eyes. “I think it looks amazing,” you said, and you meant it. Spencer's lips twitched upward, just the tiniest bit, before he turned back to his knitting, 
You were right. An hour later, Spencer had finished knitting his scarf, and now he stood in front of the mirror, carefully draping it around his neck. You sat cross-legged on the bed, watching him with a soft smile, warmth blooming in your chest. 
“I love it,” you said, your voice full of admiration. 
Spencer turned around, his eyes lighting up at your words. A big, boyish grin spread across his face. “Really?” 
You nodded without hesitation, pushing yourself off the bed and walking toward him. “Wait,” you murmured, reaching for his tie, adjusting the knot and smoothing out the fabric. “This is loose,” you added, concentrating as you tightened it properly. 
Spencer didn’t say anything at first. He simply watched you, his gaze soft, his heart full. The way you did this, these little things, the way you took care of him without a second thought, it was something he never thought he’d have. But here you were, standing close, helping him get ready for a doctor who convention like it was the most natural thing in the world. 
“Thank you,” he mumbled, a small smile on his face.
“You’re forgetting something,” you mumbled, patting his chest as you reached back to grab his hat from the bed. Standing on your tiptoes, you carefully placed it atop his curly-haired wig, adjusting it just a little, trying to make it sit right. The hat looked a little ridiculous on top of the wig, and you couldn’t suppress a small laugh. Spencer caught your eye, his lips curling into a grin. 
“Wait, sit down,” you said, tugging gently on his arm, guiding him toward the bed. 
He obeyed, sitting down and spreading his legs just enough for you to stand in between them, giving you more room to work. You bent slightly, trying to push the wig down so it would fit under the brim of the hat. 
“Stop,” you squirmed, feeling a squeeze at your waist. Spencer grinned mischievously, repeating the action, making you squirm even more. “Spencer, you’re going to be on your own with this hat if you keep doing that,” you warned with a smile.  He only chuckled in response, clearly enjoying your reaction. 
Two minutes later, you managed to press the hat firmly on his head, securing it in place. You stepped back, admiring the look. 
“There,” you said, wiping your hands together. You reached for his hand, gently tugging him toward the mirror. “You look great,” you said, leaning against his side, your smile wide and sincere. 
Spencer tugged at his scarf, adjusting it with a little nervous energy as he studied himself in the reflection. “Yeah, thanks to you,” he said with a warm smile, glancing down at you. 
Before you could respond, the doorbell rang, breaking the moment. Both of you turned toward the sound, and you hurried to open it, revealing Penelope standing there in her own costume. 
“Hello, you two lovebirds!” she called out, practically bouncing on her feet. She pointed at Spencer’s outfit, her eyes wide with excitement. “Love it, Doctor!” 
Spencer blushed slightly but couldn’t hide his grin. “Thanks, Garcia,” he said, adjusting his scarf once more. 
“Well, are you ready to go?” she practically jumped in excitement, her hands clasped together at the thought of the convention. 
Spencer nodded, but before heading out, he hesitated for a moment, his eyes flickering between you and Penelope. His gaze softened as he turned to you, a shy and affectionate look crossing his face.  He stepped closer and pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, the warmth of his lips lingering there. “I’ll see you in a few hours,” he whispered, his voice low and sweet. 
You smiled up at him, your heart swelling with love. “Have fun, Doctor,” you teased, your hand resting lightly against his chest. Penelope grinned, her eyes twinkling as she shot you both a playful look. “Seriously, you two are adorable.” Spencer blushed, scratching the back of his neck, while you just laughed, shaking your head.
With one last affectionate glance, he followed Penelope out the door, and you waved them off, your heart full. 
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woobly · 6 months ago
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THERE SHE GOES . . . 한태산 !
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PAIRING. taesan x crocheter! gn reader GENRE. fluff, uni au, strangers to ??? WARNINGS. both are in uni but no scenes about school itself lol WC. 1.4k
𓂋˚˖ A/N. lichrally dunno what this is, i just word vomited 😭 i was actually gonna make another acc bc i got kinda shy to post here again but im too lazy to do that so here we are, ig im a onedoor now too 😆 𓂋˚˖ NOW PLAYING. there she goes by the la’s
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THE FIRST TIME TAESAN SEES YOU, you were casually walking into the train car along with the rest of the morning rush. One of your hands was clutched onto your bag while the other was inside the pocket of your black puffer jacket.
He wasn’t thinking about anything in particular. It was too early in the morning, and the music playing in his ears drowned all his thoughts out while on the way to his first class.
But upon seeing you, he was immediately awakened from his morning daze and stood up from his seat. Watching you switch places with him to stand beside your seated figure, he thinks he saw you say thank you, but he’s not sure.
Not thinking much of his gesture of giving up his seat, he looked out toward the city passing by outside. That was until the train entered another tunnel, and he was forced to look at something else; you, in his peripheral vision, had suddenly brought out a crochet needle and some yarn.
He was pleasantly surprised. People were usually on their phones while on the train, while here you were, your hands half buried in your jacket as they worked on some yarn as if you were in your own little world.
He wasn’t actually sure if you were crocheting or knitting or what. He had only overheard from the other students in his classes about how they crocheted in their free time, but he had never actually seen anyone do it.
He tilted his head once in a while to watch you, trying his best not to act like a creep. Not that you would notice anyway. He did this until he had to step off at his stop first.
The second time Taesan sees you, it was a Saturday. He unfortunately had a class in the morning, and he was on the way home after having lunch with his friends and spending some time in the library.
You were already seated on the train, hands busy once again. It wasn’t rush hour, so Taesan took a seat across from you.
You seemed to be counting something, perhaps the stitches, based on the way your mouth was moving. You furrowed your eyebrows, looking closer at your project, before pulling at the string of yarn exasperatedly. He was curious about what just happened, smiling at your frustration.
He caught himself glancing at you from time to time again. And this time, you almost caught him looking at you.
He saw you again a few times after that, to the point that he’s learned where to sit or stand so that he can see your reflection in the window to avoid being caught looking at you directly. He’s even learned what days of the week you usually share train rides.
At first, it was a little freaky how the two of you managed to be on the same train at the same time a few times a week, let alone the same car. But after a while, he started looking for you, wondering where you had gone on days when he’d usually seen you.
Months had gone by like that, Taesan watching you work on what seemed like different projects from a distance.
However, this time it was a little different. There were no other available seats except the one right beside you. There was still some space on the metal bars to hold on to, but something told him to take that seat (perhaps it’s the voices in his head aka Leehan urging him to do something about his little train crush; Taesan always denies it by saying it’s not a crush).
This time, it was difficult to see your face, so he could only look at your hands. He tried so hard to be subtle, but he supposes he wasn’t subtle enough because you suddenly put your needle and yarn down on your lap and took something out from your bag.
“Hey, I uh… made something for you,”
You were now looking at his wide eyes, a rush of different emotions suddenly coursing through him. Ashamed because you noticed him watching; touched because you made something for a stranger like him; and shy because you were talking to a guy like him.
He finally looked at your open hand that delicately held a stuffed black cat keychain.
“Is this a cat?”
“Yeah, that’s you,” you said as you smiled tightly. You acknowledge that he was a good-looking guy, but there was still something about him that intimidated you a little. “Um, I���m sorry if that offends you. I made it based on the vibe you gave off, but I don’t mean to stereotype based on the clothes you wear. Not that I made you a black cat because you always wear black, but the dark hair covering your eyes a little also kinda—,” you rambled, stopping when you see the look on his face and realizing you might have said too much.
Taesan chuckled. “Don’t worry, I’m not offended. May I ask why…?”
“Um… no reason,” you shrugged with another tight smile, trying to mask the blatant lie you just told him.
“Well, I’m honored. This is really cute,” Taesan smiled, looking at you then at anything but you.
You finally smiled with a more relaxed expression, lips pursing to keep yourself from smiling too widely.
“I figured it wouldn’t hurt to give it to you after already making it, plus you sat here today,”
The truth is, you also noticed him that first time. You noticed his repeated presence the same way he did. When he was looking outside, you looked around the train car only for your gaze to land on him. You actually lied when you said you made a keychain for him. It’s actually a gift meant for one of your friends, but you decided at the last minute to use it to shoot your shot—you could always make another one. If he realized that you were also watching him from what you just said, then he was nice enough to not bring it up.
“This is crochet, right?” Taesan asked as he looked around his bag for a place to hang the keychain.
“Yup! I like to do arts and crafts as a pastime, and crocheting is the most… mindless one for me—for lack of a better word,” you both chuckled. “But it also keeps me from falling asleep when I commute alone. That’s why I mostly do it on the train,”
Taesan nods, his mind still processing what was happening.
“You go to Hybe U, right? Saw your ID,”
You looked down at your lanyard and held it. “Oh yeah. You?”
“I go to KOZ,” Your eyes light up in recognition as it’s the college not far from yours.
“We should—“ “If it’s—“ you both say at the same time.
Chuckling, Taesan gestures for you to go first.
“We should hang out some time… is what I was gonna say,” you smiled, looking at the boy beside you.
“Yeah, I’d like that. And I was gonna say that if it’s any help, I could wake you up at your stop,”
You frowned in confusion. “But you get off first,”
“It’s okay. I have time before class,” Taesan smiled shyly, unsure what to do with himself after making such an offer.
You looked away, realizing the boy wasn’t as intimidating as you thought.
“Well, I’ll hold you to that.”
BONUS:
True enough, by midterms season, you spent most of your train rides asleep on Taesan’s shoulder. You started falling asleep in the middle of crocheting more often to the point that you stopped carrying your projects altogether and opted to indulge in Taesan’s insistence.
The both of you were on the way home when he was reminiscing about his conversation with his friends earlier that day.
“Look at you. Who would’ve thought you out of all people would carry so many keychains on their bag?” Leehan commented after the boy in question mentioned how that first black cat keychain was apparently not even meant for him. You told him after a while that you gave it to him in the spur of the moment as an excuse to talk to him.
“Yeah, it’s kinda funny seeing you in your band shirts then you turn around and suddenly there’s a bunch of colorful animals and characters. Personally, I really like the Sanrio ones,” Sungho said teasingly. “Plus the way I just know it’s you when you enter a room because your bag is so noisy,”
“It’s not funny, Y/N made them! The plastic ones they also got for me,” Taesan blurted in faux offense, smiling and internally agreeing with the older boy.
“Yeah no, it’s cute actually,” Sungho said before bursting into laughter.
“Then ask Y/N for one. Actually no, don’t do that,” his friends chuckled at him.
“Then make one for me,”
“You know, I’ve already asked them to teach me. But I sucked so bad, and Y/N fell asleep while waiting for me.” Taesan chuckled while recalling the first time you hung out at the library.
“Man, he’s got it pretty bad.”
© woobly, 2025. all rights reserved.
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rueclfer · 23 days ago
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HAPPY 6K BBY!!!! i’ve had notifs on since 2k im literally so happy for u eeeeee!!!!!
ok wait this req is kinda specific so bare w me. so fast food right. the old place i used to work at usually had two ppl every shift w the lil drive thru headsets on and there was this guy that whenever i worked w him he would use the walkie talkie feature to tell me jokes nd flirt w me over the headset!!!! nd only me nd him could hear what he was saying teehee >.<
ANYWAYS it’s always given me succchhhh denki energy omg pls tell me im not crazy!! ^^;
THANKK YOUUU!!! since 2k is CRAZYY IM GIGGLING i love this concept like little summer job, trying to do whatever to entertain yourselves during the slow hours... YEAH THANK SM (tell me if u got with him plsss this is such a love story)
food service!denki // job fair
event m.list
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"hellooo," you sing into the headset after adjusting it to your head, "who's on the other line today? over."
"i don't knowww. over," a familiar voice sings back, "give me your best guess. over."
you couldn't resist rolling your eyes despite no one being around to see it
"you only need to say 'over' when you're done talking, denki. you're always fuck the system up."
you hear a groan come from the other end of the line, only bringing a chuckle out of you.
"fuck off, i'm hungover."
the line goes quiet for a beat.
"hello?"
"one more time?" you snort, "can you say that one more time? over."
"huh? i said i'm so hung-OH!"
he falls into a fit of laughter for a minute, unable to catch his breath as he falls into snorts and wheezes. his laugh was contagious. while you’re chuckling to yourself, in the corner of your eye, you see sero wiggling his eyebrows at you, in which you retaliate with your middle finger.
“fuck off,” you mouth.
"shut up," he says in between coughs, "you know what i meant. over," he emphasizes.
“not sure if i did, denks, i was almost scared i’d have to go to HR for a sec.”
“stooop,” he whines. “i almost called out today, but i didn’t. imagine being me, hungover as shit and still having to come in at- oh shit wait someone's coming.”
after a few car passes through, you get a second to breathe.
"aye was that guy in the red car a bitch to you too or what?"
"no?" you watch the red car in question turn out of the drive way with a wave, "he was nice."
"you and that god damn pretty privilege," denki grumbles, earning another eye roll from you.
it was the start of the lunch rush. besides some moments of annoyed groans and mumbles, you’ve barely been able to get another word in with each other until it was the end of denki’s shift a couple hours later.
“i’m off right now, babe,” he says, followed by a deep sigh crackling through your ear piece, “kiri’s taking over for me, so go ahead and utilize that mute button, alright?”
you laugh, “oh thank god, i haven’t talked to bestie in a minute.”
denki blows a raspberry into the mic- his official sign off. you roll your eyes and lean back against the counter, half tempted to pull out your phone and check your work schedule to see the next time you work with him.
you grabbed the next order to send out, double checking its contents before the car pulls up to your window.
your customer service smile slapped back onto your face like muscle memory as the window slides open.
“hi-,” you begin before being cut off by the teenage girl and her giggling friend in the passenger seat.
“the guy at the first window wanted me to give this to you,” she beams, holding out a folded up receipt paper out towards you.
you traded your items- her bag of food for your note. the look of confusion was plastered to your face during the entire interaction, but her smile never left as they drove off giggling.
you peered out the window and waited until the car is out of view before leaning back against the counter and unfolding the thin receipt. 
have a good shift smelly see you tomorrow night :P
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kings-highway · 1 year ago
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some safe-for-work headcanons regarding how they might of gone about having sex for the first time for some of my favouritr haikyuu ships:
daisuga: look you know these bitches had it scheduled. not like a meticulous planned thing, but it was definitely something they knew was going to happen in advance. Like they talked about it, agreed they both wanted it, and then 3 weeks later Suga's parents go away for the weekend and they know like a solid week in advance that their "hang out" on Saturday evening is basically exclusively so they can have sex. They're very prepared. This also probably makes that week of training super annoying for the team bc they cant figure out why their captains are being SO overly giggly like you are seventeen/eighteen year old men wtf is going on.
iwaoi: i've always thought they were probably way more nervous than any of their friends assumed and definitely did not have sex as early as people thought. like mattsun and makki both constantly tease them in a way that insinuates they're actively having sex but they probably didnt actually do it until like... the last few months of high school. They were both just nervous! Iwa was very afraid of rushing things and doing it "wrong," and Oikawa wasnt even sure what doing it "right" would be so they had like 6 false-starts before they actually managed it.
ushiten: dorm living is not condusive to intimacy so when for the first time in like 8 months since they started dating that they have a confirmed evening with a locked dorm alone they end up making out for just a crazy amount of time. Tendou is too nervous to actually move anything forward because he's too anxious over the possibility of rejection but he keeps making these weird half-insinuations like "haha I cant believe nobody's going to be back for another four hours... we could do anything and get away with it... isnt that so funny... like nobody would know if we were making out or having sex or just reading a book... haha... isnt that crazy... me and you..." and he's all weird and twitchy about it until Ushijima tells him he doesn't think the idea of them having sex is crazy at all and then it is on immediately.
kuroken: highkey, kuroo probably lays out like a whole romantic, corny ass evening with candles and rose petals and is prepared to have a whole long conversation about being "ready" and Kenma just sort of rolls his eyes and is like "have you finished talking? this is Too Much. I need you to understand this is Too Much. Oh my god I love you but WOW." (it works anyway and Kenma is sufficient wooed).
tsukkiyama: this one might be a little out there but I genuinely think they're the most likely to have it happen by accident, or in a spontaneous moment of opportunity. Like they both intend to just take advantage of the empty house with only a bit of making out and then suddenly they're losing their clothes and it's like "we'll have a conversation about it tomorrow, im sure."
kagehina: okay this one is more stupid but I imagine after they've been dating a while Hinata is like "you know what, im ready to take the next step" but Kageyama cannot read ppl so Hinata's somewhat obvious attempts at seduction go entirely over his head, and Hinata is getting increasingly frustrated and dramatic and trying really really hard to get Kageyama to realize what he wants and it ends up causing a fight between them because Kageyama thinks Hinata is being weird and Hinata thinks Kageyama is being intentionally distant and eventually Kageyama blows up and is like "Oh my god if you want to break up or something just say so!!!" and Hinata is like "Oh my GOD I dont want to break up with you I want to have sex with you!!!" and of course that shuts everyone up and unfortunately Yachi is probably also there and wants to die.
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kireilien · 5 months ago
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how do you think Maki's member is like? Honestly, I think he stands out quite a bit since it’s usually noticeable at first glance, I mean, have you seen the water sports episode?🫠
nghhhh maki cock
i finished this in less than 20 minutes i am cooked.
tw/cw. nsfw content, cursing; maki cock thoughts. + his cum
literally no shade to anyone, but people saying that maki is the biggest out of the teamies bc he’s half german is lwk weird…….. why are we encouraging borderline eugenics (and i use that lightly bc yes true definition isn’t this situation there’s nuance but anyways) 
he’s THICK. like STUPID THICK. and the water sports ep has me so insane his dick print,,, IS JS OUT THERE LIKE FUCK WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO 
im basing his cock off of his hands and his body bc that’s the best way you could really dissect it but if you look at his hands, they’re huge. did we literally forget that jojo has the largest hands and maki is around the same size. maki is also naturally hella fucking wide. like his neck and shoulders were wide even before he started to work out. also the members have constantly said that maki is huge even now. 
maki is definitely thick but i wouldn’t say too long, he’s not slanging an insane monster cock, it’s a respectable 5.7 in / 14.4 cms or smaller when soft, nothing more, i’d say likeeee 5.9 in / 14.9 cms in girth. and this is when he’s soft like he is HUGE guys. his hardness gets him to around 6.4 / 16.4 cms when all of the blood rushes to his cock. definitely a shower than a grower due to the fact he was born huge. his girth is around the same ratio too at 6.6 / 16.6 cms maybe even egging on to 6.7 in / a perfect 17 cms— heavy cock!
THIS SEEMS LIKE PURE FANTASY BUT GUYS IVE BEEN STARING AT HIS DICK PRINT FOR LIKE TWO HOURS AND CROSS REFERENCING TO DICK PICS TO SEE ACCURATE RESULTS YES IM ANALYZING HIS COCK BETTER THAN MY HWS LEAVE ME ALONE
huge balls btw. big breeder balls. mmmh. also pretty clean shaven most times, but doesn’t mind a trim if he’s busy, nothing too messy. CUT CUT CUT HES SO CUT i could not imagine him uncut even as someone who likes uncut guys </3 pretty veiny, not too veiny they only really show up when he’s really hard. his cock is also a little darker from his skin tone, it turns darker as you get to the base of his cock. im also a believer that it’ll go flesh to his stomach when he’s hard. 
k now i’m thinking of size training w him FUCK!
++ extra!!!! his cum is really milky like really liquid, it’s on the clearer side because he’s an idol, he has to stay healthy, but he cums more than average, he def has a few more spurts than a typical guy
visual one | visual two | (nsfw links/on twt)
links aren’t 100% accurate i’m not a twt demon anymore lol
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back 2 my maki catalog
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kryptznnn · 19 days ago
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♡/♛- It's Been A While [V]
₊•.°.⋆✮⋆.°.•₊ ₊•.°.⋆✮⋆.°.•₊ ₊•.°.⋆✮⋆.°.•₊
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.°.•₊ ₊•.°.⋆✮⋆.°.•₊
➸ INTERESTS; -mha!shouta aizawa x quirk-using!freader
➸ BACKGROUND; - after an attack at the high school you studied in, you were requested by your work firm and the firm of that school to work as a teacher there for extra security, incase an attack were to occur again to protect the students (and teachers). Unfortunately, it won't be as easy as you expected when you rekindle with old friends, and a specific someone.
➸ WARNINGS; - roughly 5k, smut, p in v, toxic relationship mentions, therapy, breakups, hookups, sexual encounter, kissing, heat of the moment, etc.
➸a.i; - 🌸my main navigation. IM SO SORRY FOR THIS LATE UPDATE WTFFF it’s been like 10 months 💔💔 so sorry. back and better then ever ik this might seem horribly rushed but i promise ill update within the week (or month)
౨ৎ⋆˚。⋆౨ৎ⋆˚。⋆౨ৎ⋆˚。
♡/♛- It's Been A While [IV]
♡/♛- It's Been A While Masterlist
It’s been a full week, tossing, turning, driving, and working. There was no stop to what you were doing and exhausted wasn’t even the word you’d use to explain what you’ve gone through.
It’s also been a full week since you had a full conversation with Shouta, especially about what happened between the two of you.
You had acted like it hadn’t bothered you, which wasn’t the case, but you were too busy to genuinely sit and think of it, or think of ways to apologizing and speak to him again.
Hopping back and forth between therapy, the agency, and UA was a headache, there would be days were you’d go all day without eating just to end up being too tired to eat once you get back to your new ‘home’.
Either that or you’d stay up late at night looking at new places to move into, wanting to leave everything behind you as soon as possible.
It was saddening to look back on honestly, no matter who in the agency or at school would invite you into their group out to go drinking or partying you’d decline.
Your answer was always along the lines of “I’m too busy and have no time”, and before someone could push or pry into your business you had already turned around with the click of your heels and skipped off.
Thankfully the only relief you had received was that your time within the working of UA was nearly over, as more pro-hero’s and teachers were soon to be added to the upcoming semester. Just one more month and half the weight of your shoulders would be deduced.
Therapy was a major help also, you didn’t have to worry yourself entirely of attacks and trauma haunting you daily, the visits of them becoming less and less until you expected them all to be gone. It wouldn’t be the best idea to be taking the medication you’ve been prescribed anyways with your now bad eating habits.
Things weren’t perfect but they were smooth, nothing terrible had happened and no major attacks had occurred or come into light, you were okay. As long as you could keep things stable and pushing for now everything would be fine.
You couldn’t deny the uneasiness in your chest whenever you were driving back to the house, especially studying the hours of when Shouta would be home.
By the time you’d finish working for the day and head back he wouldn’t be there, and by the time you prepped yourself to head out to the agency he’d return.
Embarrassing enough it seemed the tension between the two of you was visible, especially within the halls or the teacher lounge.
It hadn’t helped that your classes were just down the hall from one another, so no matter if your door was open you would constantly see him at his.
It was awkward, and that’s just an easy way of putting it. You weren’t sure why but you felt like a wave of anxiety wash over you whenever his name or something that reminded you of him was around.
At first you’d let it get to you, but eventually you realized how badly it was effecting your work, so you swallowed it.
Just because you ignore something doesn’t mean it’ll go away forever, it’ll just come back twice as strong. You wanted to focus on the issue, figure out the right words to come forth and apologize the right way, but you didn’t know what to do.
Was it better to say what you think he’d like to hear or what’s actually on your mind. Regardless of what you say or how things end up you’d be eaten by anxiety regardless.
Maybe the best solution was to just find another place to live in and leave his life for good.
And that’s exactly what you planned on doing, like right now when you had come home way later than expected, going over to your old apartment and packing whatever else was left in there in your trunk.
You took a deep breath and shook off all nerves that were gnawing at you before putting the key into the door and turning the knob.
As you had done several times before, you hadn’t raised your head, keeping it hung low and paying attention to the small scuffs of dirt on your shoes as you closed and locked the door.
Your music was louder than usual, hopefully not too loud to catch onto others attention, but yet again they’re playing in your earphones for your entertainment, so you try not to care entirely.
You make a sharp right turn, walking down into the hallway and opening the door to your room, placing your work bag down on your bed before removing your coat with a sigh.
You sat on your bed and debated what you should do, talk to him tonight and let him know what was in store for the week, or wait until the last day.
It would be easier to talk to him today and get everything over with, so it was decided. It wasn’t easy, because as soon as you stepped out of your room it seemed as it all of the vessels in your body were attempting to pull you back.
The walk towards the dining room was agonizingly long, you had even paused your music and removed your headphones, making things worse in your case.
It felt as if you were walking across a dessert of silence, the faint sounds of muffled laughter from what you assumed was the TV grew louder as your steps became quicker.
It didn’t seem like the silence was hurting now, and you didn’t even have to think of an alternative of Shouta not being home, because you knew by this time he was, especially because the lights of the room were on and he was obviously watching TV.
The floor felt so cold, even through your thick socks, making your pace even quicker to get to your desired destination.
No matter how much you tried to ignore the bursting feeling in your stomach and chest it was obvious how bad your anxiety was.
If anything the entire look was probably plastered all over your face. It was definitely something no one could prepare you for, not even wiki how.
It would probably taint your search history with something so stupid. ‘How to tell your ex you’re moving out after making out with each other last week?’ yeah it sounded even dumber reciting it in your head, but it made you chuckle a bit, relieving some nerves.
Unfortunately those nerves went right back into action once your chuckle alarmed Shouta, making him whip his head over in your direction before turning his attention back to the television.
You frowned a bit, keeping your head down and fists clenched before making your way over to his side, sitting on the opposite side of the couch.
“I wanted to talk to you..” you longed, looking at the TV then back to him, watching as he used the remote to mute the TV and turning his head to you. He only looked at you, his eyes longing for your response with a look off sorrow in his eyes.
It was almost the same look he wore on his face years ago when you had planned to break up with him, crazily enough he had already knew before you told him, but it still didn’t help the pain he felt. Now he had to relive the entire thing over and over again.
“I know we haven’t been on the best terms all week, and I really am sorry for it all, but I didn’t want to make things awkward or anything without thanking you for letting me stay here for the time being, it-“
“You’re leaving.” He spoke, cutting you off, his tone was flat, hardly making his question actually sound like one, more of a statement or command. Thankfully you knew him well enough to know that’s not how it was meant to come out, you only nodded in response.
“I’ve found a new apartment to move into, and it’s more secure than my last. It’s also closer to the agency so I have a little more time on my hands.
It’s not a secured deal yet, but I’ve completely moved out of my last apartment and I can’t bombard your home so..” You spoke, nodding your head to yourself as you spoke as a way to agree with your choice in words.
There was a deafening silence for a moment, you stole several glances at Shouta, who only sat up now, adjusting himself onto the couch before turning to you fully.
You only looked away, placing your hands flat out onto your lap and patting them softly as if playing hand drums to soothe yourself.
“And you have to leave in order to find a better place for work.” He said, folding his arms as he thought to himself, earning an approving hum from you.
“Yes, it might be easier for me that way, I think the only downside is that it’s farther from the school and my therapy appointments, but it’s nothing but extra gas money.” You said, your eyes not leaving your lap as you now began to pick at the skin around your thumb.
“But do you want to leave here?” He asked subtly, now moving closer to you on the couch. You only blinked a couple of times before glancing over to the side slightly before turning back to your lap, swallowing harshly.
You made sure to take in his question, at least to a certain extent before daring to answer. It was a good question to be fair, you weren’t sure what you wanted.
You knew you couldn’t stay here forever, that much was true, but maybe a part of you fantasized about it after living here for a while.
You enjoyed your time with Shouta and everyone else from your childhood prior, you didn’t want to just move far away to see everyone less and focus more on the agency. Although you enjoy helping and working for those in need of it, it didn’t necessarily mean you enjoyed doing all of it.
“I don’t have a choice and it really doesn’t matter whether I’d like too or not. The agency needs me and after what I’ve made you go through i’d be surprised if you’d want me around still..” You spoke, now straightening yourself out.
An odd silence was shared between the two of you again, this time shorter than last before you cut it down. It seemed strange to you to say the least, he hadn’t seemed angry at you, more upset or confused.
Honestly if the roles were reversed you might’ve hated him with a burning passion, but when he looks at you with that face it’s hard to keep the contact.
It makes you weak mostly, not with confusion or love but guilt, guilty for how you ended things and guilty for leaving things on edge last week.
“I’m really sorry, about… last week, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” You confessed, now placing your hands down at your sides onto the cushions, turning to look at Shouta.
“Is that why you’re too afraid to look at me?” He asked, now leaning his head closer to you in attempt to get you to make eye contact with him. You jolted slightly at the movement as you watched him, your eyes flickering away and back to the TV.
“It’s not fear, It’s…. guilt” you paused before turning to him again. His eyes never left your face before locking onto your own. He opened his mouth to say something, but no words came out, so he shut it and just stared.
You weren’t sure when or how it happened but the two of you were now closer, no longer hovering on either corner of the couch but now side by side in the center of it. Your eyes never left his and his never left yours.
“If I tell you I forgive you, will it be enough to make you stay?” He spoke softly, his voice dripping with sincerity and curiosity. If you had to push it you’d think maybe it was laced with vulnerability instead.
You sat and thought to yourself for a bit, turning your head to look away from him as his head still faced you. His breathing a little heavier before as you felt it tickle your shoulder.
Before you were able to conjure a response for his question he brought his hands up to your hair, brushing it off of your shoulder behind your ear to your back.
“I need you to stay with me..” he breathed and he watched as you shuddered at his words. You made reference to repeat the word ‘need’ in your mind over and over again, Shouta had rarely used that word even during your time together when you dated as teenagers.
He purposely hadn’t used the word want or like, he used need. He needed you and you weren’t sure how to even respond to it. Immediately you shot up from where you were sitting, furrowing your brows as you frowned.
“I can’t, we can’t do this. You have work at UA and I won’t be there for much longer, and I have to return back to the agency full time.” You said, looking off to the side so you wouldn’t have to see his hurt look.
“Why are you pushing me away.” Was all he said as he stood up beside you, tossing the remote back to the couch. You only hung your head low before eyeing him, your eyes burning as they threatened to let tears slip.
You only stood in silence, contemplating what to do or what to say to him. However or whatever you would’ve said wouldn’t have been as easy as your therapist had told you, that much was evident.
He only studied your expression with a frown, wondering why and how things had gotten as bad as they had now. "You've been pushing me away and shutting me out since after we graduated as teenagers. Whatever the reason was it was enough to make you breakup with me." He said, attempting to earn a reaction out of you, which failed.
"This was a bad idea, I'm sorry for bothering you." You protested, folding your arms as you made your way out of the living room and towards your bedroom.
It wasn't a second later you heard Shouta's footsteps follow soon behind you, as if moving faster than usual.
As soon as you made way towards your door to step into your room he was behind you, his energy seeming to blend into yours.
You turned swiftly, only to be caught off guard by his lips smashing into yours, your body immediately responding as you kissed him back, your arms wrapping around the back of his neck.
He nearly immediately slammed shut your bedroom door from behind him before focusing his full attention on you.
You were quick to wrap your legs around his waist as he deepened the kiss, your tongues entwining with one another.
“Shouta” you said to him, watching his every move. He only hummed in response and kissed your palm as you made your way on top of him, straddling him now.
His other hand made its way to your lower back, now keeping you in place as his kisses traveled higher, from your palm to your arm and now your shoulder, not removing his eyes from yours.
You looked away nervously, feeling a familiar tingle in your lower belly, you knew exactly what he was doing.
He soon placed his hand from your lower back onto the back of your neck, slowly bringing your head down to kiss him passionately. It felt nice, he felt nice, you couldn’t complain, nor could you just turn or look away from him, you were captivated by him.
You were the first to pull away, your breathing heavy as you looked at him, he still kept his hand on the back of your head.
He only pushed your head back for your lips to connect yet again, but not kissing the same as before. It was wet and sloppy, your tongues practically fighting-
no,
Dancing with one another, and it only made the weak feeling within your lower belly stronger as he moved his hands, now gripping both sides of your hips as he kissed you eagerly.
You quickly pulled away, covering your mouth and wiping out of embarrassment as a small line of saliva dripped from it and down to your chin.
The two of you began to work together frantically, removing any bit of clothing that separated the two of you from being skin to skin. Clothes became friends with the floor for the time being as he unclipped your bra from behind.
Now seated in the middle of the bed you two shared he began to kiss your skin above your collarbone while you grinded on him, both of you partially clothed and breathing heavily.
He had gone to bed with nothing but his boxers on, but now he was threatening to take them off in one quick move, unable to bear the teasing anymore.
His hands roamed your body, teasing your nipples through your top as you mewled softly, grabbing his wrist softly as you guided his hand lower to your now wet spot on your underwear.
Throughout the time of your twos dirty work not a word was spoken to one another, well, barely. 
You had known each other’s bodies well enough and exactly what you craved, Shouta knew this and quickly got to work, unbuttoning the one small button that was practically ready to burst out from his erection, letting it spring out free.
When you moved back a little to look at it, it looked like he was in pain. Like painfully hard, honestly this wasn’t the first time, but it was sweet seeing how you had him this intense every time, he never seized to amaze you.
He began to tug at your underwear, to which you got off the bed, standing up as he watched your every move.
You bent over, hooking your thumbs into the hems of your underwear where they sat nice and pretty on your hips, shimmying a little as you pulled them all the way down to your ankles and stepped out of them.
You slowly made your way back onto the bed and on top of Shouta once again, who only looked at you in awe, and maybe hunger.
You only cupped your hands on both of his cheeks before kissing him again, this time he kept a hand on your hip as another one found its way to your core.
He cupped it softly as you jolted slightly, feeling his middle finger brush against your clit. He smiled into the kiss, placing his thumb over your clit and rubbing it gently, feeling the vibrations of you grunting and moaning in his mouth.
You pulled away, keeping a hand over your mouth yet again and his own mouth as you felt him insert a finger inside you.
Immediately pushing up into you as far as he could, watching as your shivered slightly, and removed your hand from his mouth, moaning into your hand.
He soon removed his hand from your hip and grabbed your wrist, removing your hand from your mouth and kissed your palm yet again.
Within a short period of time, you felt an immense amount of pressure build up inside of you, making you immediately want to shut your legs. It was surprisingly keen how well the two of you moved with one another when you'd been away for so long.
 He chuckled to himself slightly as he stuck his tongue out, teasing you and watching as your back arched before sucking on your nipples and inserting another finger.
You quickly grabbed onto his shoulders, now riding his fingers as you were trying your best to reach your high and quickly, knowing he wouldn’t let you cherish this bliss moment for long.
He soon began to lick your upper torso, the sweat beads that rolled off your body were his to consume, as if your entire body was a drug he was high on.
It was as if you had jinxed it because just seconds before you were ready to cum, he quickly removed his fingers from within you, keeping his thumb on your clit and coming to a full stop in movement. Before you were even able to stop your moans and begin your whining and protests, he aligned his cock with your entrance.
Without warning or count, he quickly thrust himself inside, halting and burying himself within your chest as he moaned along with you, your nails now digging deeper into his shoulders.
You had completely forgotten how vocal Shouta was, damn near as vocal as you, and you loved every moment of it.
“No condom?” You gasped, now playing with his hair as he kept his head between year breasts, slowly moving inside you. He only shook his head slightly, bringing his head back up and looking you in the eyes and kissing you.
"You don't know how long, I've waited for this." He groaned, dipping his head down before moaning into your flesh, making you shiver.
You attempted to bounce back on him while he thrusted into you, just for him to wrap both of his arms tightly around your bottom and thrust into you even harder.
Now repeating his earlier actions and sucking on your nipples, watching as you unraveled within his arms, only getting more turned on by the sight. His mouth now moved to your neck, giving you several hickeys and wet sloppy kisses.
As he quickened his pace you tapped his chest lightly, feeling the same blissful feeling as before coming back.
Your lower abdomen feeling as if it was floating while the rest of your body was hot and shaking. He only smiled, taking this as the most perfect time to tease you.
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head for only a moment, soon after you came down, your breathing ragged. His thrusts had now slowed down, becoming sloppier than before as he began to breath heavier, his orgasm not far behind from yours.
As verbal as he was before he wasn’t that way now, focused on reaching his orgasm as he screwed his eyes shut, taking deep breaths.
As your head rested on his shoulder you too began to moan aloud and grunt softly, his thrusts overstimulating you as you had just come down from your orgasm.
You quickly began to clench around his cock, attempting to make him reach his high sooner, which worked.
He buried his face alongside your side as he huffed, muttering a series of words, words of praise if you will, before completely reaching his orgasm.
His last thrust sent shivers down your spine as he came inside of you, not leaving a single drop to waste, staying inside of you for a moment before pulling out and kissing your shoulder.
“Are you alright?” He asked, as you pulled away, looking at him and smiling, nodding to him as you brushed his hair away from his face, that had to stuck to his temple from his sweat.
He smiled softly at you, seeing your tired expression and actions before sitting upright in the mess of sheets between the two of you.
"I'll run a bath for us." He said, standing now as he caressed your back softly as you laid nude on your belly. His touch was tender, soft, no matter how warm or hot he felt against you from the intimate moment you just shared.
"Okay" you replied tiredly, not feeling the will to move as you kept your body still. As you watched him leave shivers ran down your spine, glancing at his nude body and previous injury that seemed to have healed well as it left a scar.
You heard slight movement and clicking, then water flowing from the bathroom beside your bedroom. Soon enough Shouta arrived back at your bedroom and came over to your side, coddling you.
Soon the two of you made your way towards the bath and entered after one another and relaxed for a while.
As you two laughed and bathed one another in short comings. Enjoying one another’s company felt pleasing, it felt like home.
A satisfied sigh escaped your lips as you smiled. The two of you were embracing one another before he spoke.
“So, now are you going to tell me what’s going on with you?”
₊•.°.⋆✮⋆.°.•₊
Taglist: @getoisinnocent @shibataimu @geniejunn @hierophantmeme @kriscr0ss @r0wz4nn
✴🕷 please do not copy, plagiarize, edit, or translate any works submitted by me. all works are originated and all other pictures used within those works are online images. thank you!! @kryptznnn
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hxrtnett · 2 months ago
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something to regret — dr. rabinovitch
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𖤓°⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ in which the aftermath of the pittfest tragedy brings you and robby back together for few hours, scarily and unknowingly rekindling a flame while looking for your non-biological son together. oh, gemini by role model is the theme for this.
warning/contains. death, blood, shooter/shooting mention, anxiety, swearing, arguing, crying, etc literally no happiness here
pairing. dr rabinovitch x fem!reader
part one | part three (next week)
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you ran to the pickup truck, “are you hurt? your girlfriend?” you asked, “dr. l/n, you know this kid? dr. robby?” one of the doctors asked, you nodded, “he’s our kid, in a way.” you informed while you helped everyone escort everyone.
you and robby rushed jake and his girlfriend in, you checked jake while they took care of leah. “is she gonna be okay?” jake asked while you moved him away from her, “please y/n i want to see her-" “jake not now i’m sorry honey, please understand.” you said softly, yelling demands at the ones who stood around.
you turned to jake and wrapped his leg, checked his vitals, and tried to keep him calm. “jake, they’re going to do everything they can to save her. but a bullet went through her heart, you never know with human anatomy but this is a 50/50, maybe lower.” you spoke softly, looking at jake in the eyes. you could see the fear in his eyes, “i love you.” you said softly, “im here. i’ll always be here, we’re gonna do what we can for her.” you assured, hugging him quick. “i’ll be back i have to help triage, stay here. if you need anyone you know them.” you assured, keeping a hand on his shoulder.
you parted from your boy, walking over to see the scene of robby and dana pumping blood in and performing endless CPR. dana made eye contact with you, the girl was not going to make it. “how long have we been performing compressions?” you asked, “five minutes. one and a half transfusions so far, no pulse.” dana informed.
you looked up at robby, who quickly made eye contact with you, “dr robby.” you said. “keep going.” he responded. you looked at dana, “i’m heading to triage.” you said, your ex fiancé barely even looked at you or made any orders, he was tunnel visioning on a girl that meant plenty to the boy you guys cared for, but he was going to exhaust and ruin himself.
you and mohan helped with triage, you spotted a boy. “hey kid, you can’t be here.” the security warned as you walked up, “are you okay-?” “david!” your blood went cold as the woman robby told you about screamed at her son. “you’re the one.” you said, both you and the security trying to slow him and then chase him.
mohan helped you as SWAT tackled him, “what’s going on?” she asked, “he may be the shooter.” you informed. you guys pulled him in and robby looked at the boy, mohan, SWAT, then finally you. you weren’t harmed, you didn’t even hold eye contact. robby pulled you in the room with the kid, doing vitals and check offs before the officers could question him.
you both quietly checked the kid, asking questions and working together, calming down for a split second before-
“you’re the reason i’m fucking like this.” the kid swore at you, “if you didn’t panic over nothing i wouldn’t have been tackled.” david continued, riling you up. “oh bullshit. you think making a list and performing elder abuse wouldn’t have us hound you anyway?” you spat, pressing the bandage on harder to where he winced.
“you think coming here was smart after the shit you pulled? congrats kid, you put yourself in years of hell. hope you fucking decide to grow up.” you snapped, turning away from him.
you walked out in a storm, letting doors fling and officers jump out the way.
of course robby followed, he tried to stop you.
“l/n you can’t do that-” “then what can i do, robby? he shot jake in the leg and killed his girlfriend-” “we don’t know if she’s dead and we don’t know if he’s the shooter.” robby looked around and felt his heart pound out of his chest.
“that boy has everything tied to him being the shooter, his fucking mother tracked him at the festival. he doesn’t get to hear about the repercussions of his actions? jake’s girlfriend is dead and he’s wounded-” “we don’t know if she’s dead!” robby snapped at you. you made fair points, but you were angry, and he didn’t want to hear it. your jaw ticked and you walked away from robby.
whatever you said to him he wouldn’t agree with, you’re upset, he’s being stubborn, he wants to save the girl, you’ll be logical; you gave a shit that she was jake’s girlfriend, you wanted to cry and vomit and somehow trade your life for hers. but you didn’t want to beat a dead horse with a stick, someone needed to stop this depression.
you went to the girl, asking for updates, “dr. l/n this is my patient-” “and this is our boy’s girlfriend, everyone is caring for anyone, updates?” you asked the doctors and assistants around you. you heard the duration of CPR, the time she came in, her casualty. you looked up at robby, who fearfully held eye contact with you.
“get a ultrasound of her pulse.” you ordered, everyone waited for robby’s nod, which he gave. “micheal if we don’t hear this, we’re letting her go. this sucks and i hate losing kids, or anyone, but there is no way to save her.” you spoke softly, looking up at the man.
robby was handed the monitor, you both worked together to work it, and before you knew it you were all holding your breaths to catch a pulse.
point one. nothing.
point two. nothing.
point three. nothing.
“micheal.” you said softly, you both were teary. he nodded and pronounced her dead. you helped him move the bed with the others, but robby was pulled away.
dana helped you lead her to the pediatrics wing, you knew this was a lot on robby. dana stood with you and placed her hand on your shoulder, “we tried. he tried. he would’ve kept going if you never stopped him, he would’ve exhausted himself or hurt himself if you didn’t stop him. you weren’t an asshole for letting the dead girl die.” dana said softly, you nodded. “jake’s gonna hate us.” you said, blinking the tears away. this is why you left the pitt fully, you never should’ve came down for extra hours.
“angel, she had a bullet through her heart, there was no saving her unless it was a miracle. he’ll understand over time but it’ll hurt like hell for him and all of you. just be there like you have been, you’re good at that and jake will want it.” dana assured, leaving you alone with the bodies.
you let yourself cry, just for a bit before you composed yourself and found robby. he looked at you and broke from his sadness to acknowledge the previous crying. “we gotta tell him.” you said.
and so there you stood, in the pediatrics wing with robby and jake. it first was normal grief, then it turned. jake started blaming you both, blaming robby. he started going further and blaming robby for tearing everything in jake’s life apart; robby and his mom, robby and you, jake and his girlfriend.
“you’re something to regret-” “enough jake. okay let’s leave.” you led him out despite his arguing, bringing him to a bed. “i swear i’ll restrain you if you try and go argue with micheal. he did everything to save her, we did, we didn’t ask to save the ones we did we tried equally for everyone. a bullet gore her heart, you loved her and it’s going to hurt. but we did everything with what we had.” you told him, turning away to walk back to help.
as you helped others and tended to your previous patients, you noticed robby’s absence. the last you saw him was in the pediatrics wing, that fucking room, he had to be there. you notified where you were headed, and you were right.
“micheal.” you greeted as you walked in and crouched in front of robby, who was in the midst of a panic attack. you wiped his tears and he shook his head and wiped his own.
“leave me-” “micheal-” “i’m something to regret, im breaking y/n, leave me here.” “micheal robinavitch you’ve lost some people and it’s a lot on you and it’s a lot to be responsible of, but you’re a damn good doctor and i will not let you sit here and kill yourself over and over. you are a different and broken man but you are someone i will never regret. you hear me?” you stopped him from going to that mental ledge.
you didn’t want him finding a physical one.
“i love you, and im not gonna watch you break. you need help, you need stability, you need to get up and help me, i need you to be the doctor i know you are, i need you.” you spoke. micheal looked up at you, heavily breathing and scared. you wiped his tears and took his glasses from him that were in a death grip.
you got up and held a hand out, gently pulling him up. “breathe big guy.” you said softly, putting a hand to his chest and leading him on steadier breathing. he looked at you with more concern at your actions, rather than over how he felt.
“i’m coming home tonight, i dont want either of us alone tonight.” you spoke, staring right into his eyes. you meant it. robby nodded, wiping his face and walking out with you from the pediatrics room.
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waffledforbreakfast · 1 year ago
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Ego - Catchup!! - [BLLK X READER SCENARIOS]
Staring: Ego x f!reader
[ BLLK Scenario Masterlist ]
TW: heavy ooc, bad grammar, bad spelling, bad formatting, cringe, scuff, etc.
>First Encounter
You took a sip of your drink, sitting at the short table by the cafe door, people crowding around the small shop, i suppose around this time is rush hour, after all.
“This is fine! Perfectly normal, nothing to see here….” you typed away gibberish on your notes app to seem busy, and hope that no one would talk to you. Specifically the weird man standing in the corner, who’s been staring at you for the past 4 minutes. You’re not even sure if he’s blinked… 
“I should really get outta here… is he STILL staring at me???? Alright im out-” you thought to yourself, and got ready to leave. But not before Mr. Mysterious-Man sat down across the table.
“Hello.” he stared right into your eyes. You levitated above your seat, half-way through standing up
“Hi…?” you smiled awkwardly, sitting back down as if it wasn’t a choice. He looked like he’d kill you if he did. And that bowl cut wasn’t helping-
“Do I know you?” you asked, quickly examining the man
“No. This is our first interaction. It’s nice to meet you, [Y/N] [L/N].” the man smiled, showing off his eerily straight teeth and pitch black eyes, extending a hand.
A shiver went down your spine at the sight, but you shook his hand anyway. “Haha… how do you know my name? Mr…?”
“Jinpachi.” he stated, his eyes never once leaving yours “Ego Jinpachi. I’m the director of Project Blue Lock. And you are the renowned [Y/N], correct? You were the pride and joy of Japan’s soccer at your peak, then you disappeared and your contracts were terminated. It’s been a while since anyone has seen you.”
It was creepy. How much did this man know about you??
“Yea… something like that” you muttered, sipping your drink again 
“I’m a big fan.” he stated, (which you did not believe at all) “I have your ‘ Birthday Special ! Plushie ’.”
“Oh!” that caught you off guard-... 
Ego slid you a business card, “You should work alongside me on Project Blue Lock. I assure you, there are many benefits.” he stood up and bowed, “Please send an email if you’re interested.”
And with that, the man left the cafe. Leaving you at your little coffee table alone.
There were still many people around, the whole interaction only lasted max 6 minutes anyway, but those were easily the most interesting 6 minutes since you ended your career.
You stood up and took the business card, flipping it around in your hands
“Project Blue Lock / Blue Lock: Project Word-Champion [Blue Lock: PWC] / Blue Lock TV [BLTV] ”
That many projects? Surely working on those would bring good money, right? You wondered how long your savings could support you before you would eventually need a job again…
He had crossed out the official business email, and written his own/personal one instead… 
You pocketed the card, picked up your drink and went on your way. But maybe, just maybe you’ll send him an email. It didn’t sound like a terrible idea anyway….
>Second Encounters 
You stepped through the automated double doors, blue pentagons decorating the room
“Hey Ego” you greeted, looked around the dark room filled with monitors and file cabinets 
“Hello, Ms.[Y/N]. I’m glad to see you’ve taken up my offer after all.” he spun around in his wheely chair like the anime villain he is. “I’m sure Anri has greeted you well?”
Anri nodded eagerly beside you, “Yes! I gave her a map of the place, drinks, food, my number, and a master keycard!”
“Good good. Ego stood up before you, looking into your eyes for a good few seconds before deciding to speak again. “Please make yourself comfortable, Anri will guide you to your room, I’ll be in here if you need me.” Ego when back to his chair, redirecting his attention to the monitors.
You followed Anri through the halls, trying to remember your steps(which was hard in such a repetitive building…) 
“So, Ms.[Y/N], do you think I could get your autograph after!?” she looked at you with stars in your eyes “Oh and one for Ego too- I think he’s too embarrassed to ask you” she laughed
“Sure!” you laughed as well, “And no need for the ‘ms’.”
Anri nodded “Alright then. This is your room” she opened the door and showed you inside “It’s pretty spacey, feel free to decorate as you wish! My room is just down the hall, and Ego’s is across from mine. Please let me know if there’s anything you need.”
You hummed an acknowledgement, looking around the room. “Here” you took two of the business cards on the nightstand and signed them, handing them to Anri. “For your’s and Ego’s troubles”
She smiled and took them happily “Thank you! I’ll be sure to give one to him today. And don’t worry too much! Ego’s been pretty happy having you around, he’s been checking his email every hour since the first day you guys met, LOL!” she laughed at the memory “He’s also been worrying about welcoming gifts or something- he was asking me if girls like flowers and whatnot… you do like them right? Actually don’t answer that- he already bought them, haha…”
You tried to hide an amused smile, “Alright, I’ll have to ask him about it”
She nodded before making her way out your room “Mhm! I’ll see you around!” 
You waved at her as she closed the door, now alone in your new room. You wondered how the rest of your time here at Blue Lock would go…
BONUS
You looked around the halls, which one was this? Surely your room was one of these… right?
“This one!” you grabbed the doorknob with blind confidence, and put your full body weight on the door and pushed.
Un(fortunately), that’s was not your room.
You fell to the ground, overestimating how heavy the door is. “Ow…” you swore under your breath, even though it didn’t hurt at all- (A/N: please tell me i'm not the only person that does this-...)
“You okay?” 
You looked up at the man staring down at you, “WTF HE LOOKS LIKE HE’S GONNA KILL ME???”
Ego squatted down and tilted his head “Not injured are you?”
“I-nono im good” you sat up quickly and brushed yourself off
Ego nodded, “did you need something?”
“Oh uhm… nope! I’ll figure it out.” you insisted. You couldn’t let Ego know you got lost! How pathetic would he think you are!?
“Ok, well the door’s there.”
“Yup ok! Sorry….!”
You smiled awkwardly while mentally panicking as you make your way out
“Here.” Ego spat out quickly, shoving a bouquet in your hands, before pushing you out the door. You didn’t get a good look at his face, but that was probably bc he was turned away from you ;)
>Birthday gifts from him
This man either gets you the bare minimum because he was busy til last second, or went all out and got you everything you wanted. Depends on how busy he was.
He knows nothing about throwing you a party, or going out, so Anri went with you instead(if you wanted to)
Ego doesn’t quite understand the point in cakes, but he knew you wanted one, so he went to the grocery store and bought the first one he saw (he knows nothing about cakes)
Anri had him put on a party hat and one of those party blower things (yk, the ones that shoot out then curl back in like a snail? Yea, just the thought of him with one of those amuse me.
He probably just gave you his (black?)card and told you to buy whatever you wanted. If you asked him to go with you to the mall he would, but he would REFUSE to carry your bags. “ you were the one who bought it. ” or smt like that… but if you bother him enough, he wouldn’t mind carrying a few ;)
>Roommate
This man, cannot clean for the life of him
Actually no, he is very capable of it, he just can’t be bothered too….
At first you tried to get him to clean, but eventually gave up after he waved you off and said he’d do it later, for the 5th time….
He doesn't say it often, but he’s really grateful that you clean for him, and his thanks come in the form of surprise take out food when you get back from work
You tried to figure out his sleep schedule, but everytime you checked he’d be awake. 1pm? Awake. 11pm? Awake. 4am? Awake. 
You asked him when he sleeps, and he just shrugged
After living with you though, his schedule started to change. You wouldn’t know it, but Ego now sleeps a bit after you do, and wakes up just before. 
And he will glare at you if you wake him up.
Will refuse to eat anything but instant ramen. But on VERY special occasions, he’ll make and exception for the food you cook. This happens around 3 times a year-
Ego will also steal any and all snack you bought, nor does he read any sticknotes you may’ve stuck on your food.
Doesn’t go out often, and doesn’t tell you when he does.
His living habits go through phases of months, he’ll be super healthy for a while, just to throw himself into work the next few months, this man does not know the work “consistent” when it comes to work or life
>Kiss on the cheek
This man reacts fastttt, his eyes widened before you were off him.
He whipped his head around to stare at you, face in pure shock. He just stands there with wide eyes.
It takes a bit before he can form any kind of thought, but he’ll grab your waist and pull you in, resting his head either on your head or in your nape, but he won’t say anything
I don’t think this man has had affection before 😭
He’ll return a quick kiss on your neck too ;)
>Watching his game
You insisted on watching one of the NEL games with Ego, and he finally gave in.
“I don’t understand why you’re making this such a big deal.” Ego stood a bit behind you while you set up popcorn, drinks and blankets behind the one-way glass Ego said you had to watch behind.
“Cmon, it’ll be fun!” You fluffed up the pillows and sat down, opening a bag of your sour patch kids (A/N: u better like sourpatchkids.) 
Ego hesitated before sitting down beside you (closer than he usually does with other, how strange...) and snatching your candy, keeping his eyes on the game.
You frowned and pouted at him for a bit, before grabbing one of the two popcorn bags and tearing it open.
Which Ego also snatched-
He plucked a piece of popcorn and popped it in his mouth. Before spitting it out and coughing.
“HAHAHHAILWUEHFAILEFLMAOOOOOOO” you laughed at him, tearing up almost
“SHUT UP.” he glared at you “You’re disgusting for liking butter.”
“No, I’m normal. You’re a psychopath for liking yours plain.”
He rolled his eyes in response before grabbing the other bag, and enjoying his unbuttered popcorn in peace.
You two watched the game, making comments and analyzing the game as it unfolded.
“Look at that old dog, he’s actually so ass.” Ego spat
“NOEL NOA????”
“Did I stutter?”
“...ur just jealous”
“No im not.”
“You totally are. He’s better than you, admit it”
“NO HE’S NOT.”
“YES HE IS”
And oh look at that! While you two were arguing, somehow the space between you guys shrank? 👀
I’m sure one of you two will notice when you guys stop arguing, which will be soon, right?...
SEPARATE (ALTERNATIVE)
You stared at the laptop screen intently, watching the striker run across the field.
Your door was closed and your lights were off, you hoped that no one would think you’d be awake, despite it being 10am-...
It was so hard to find videos of Ego. It was mentioned that he was pro at one point, but there was nothing on the first page of google about his soccer career! 
But finally you found a video, so yes you were gonna watch it.
“[Y/N]” Ego practically threw your door open “Wake-... What are you watching?”
You had slammed the laptop shut and shoved it under your pillow, laughing awkwardly “Nothing!”
He glared at you. He’s not buying sh%t.
“ EGO JINPACHI SCORESSSS ” your laptop blares 
Shit.
“[Y/N]. WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING”
He gets closer to you, his eyes almost bulging out of his head. “[Y/N].!?”
BONUS
“Ego, you okay?” Enri looked concerningly at the man. He’d been sitting there with his head in his hands, and is he… blushing???
“Anri. She found it…”
“Your secret collection of her merch?”
“nO-”
>Telling him you’re busy
Usually Ego was the one busy, he rarely had time for you. You decided to get him back and pretend that you were busy the next time he asked
__________________
Bowl Cut Boy ♡ Thursday 21:30 getting Ramen. 
You Okk, have fun!
Bowl Cut Boy ♡ ?
You ???
Bowl Cut Boy ♡ Fine ill pick you up.
You OH U WANTED ME TO GO W/U?? Sorry im busy lol
Bowl Cut Boy ♡ ? At 9pm?????
You Wait 21:30 is 9:30pm??? oops
Bowl Cut Boy ♡ Dumbass. Get there yourself.
You >:(
___________________
>First Date
“A… Date?” you looked at Ego, still processing his bluntness
“Yes. Anri kept bothering me about it. Are you interested?”
“Uhm…. Yea! Sure i am!”
“Great. I’ll come pick you up later.”
You nodded as Ego went off. You hadn’t moved an inch, still trying to figure out what just happened “Holy sh%t- I HAVE A DATE WITH EGO.” you tried to calm yourself as you returned to your room.
“Wait- what time did he say? HE DIDN’T TELL ME WHEN. OR WHERE. IS IT EVEN TODAY????”
You dug through your closet, but it was hard putting together an outfit when you had no clue where you were going. 
Finally, you picked an outfit you were happy with. Ego probably didn’t pick a very fancy place. Unless he did- you supposed he’d pick something ‘traditional’ to get it over with… it probably wasn’t gonna be a ‘fun’ date to the aquarium or anything…. Unless he did because Anri told him to- Aghhh this man told you nothing! This ‘date’ was truly a wildcard.
You fell back on your bed, sighing. Whatever happens, at least you picked an fit! That’s a good start.
“[Y/N].” you heard a knock at the door “Let’s go.”
WHAT. ALREADY??? HOW LONG DID YOU SPEND PICKING WHAT TO WEAR- oh it’s been like 3 hours already. It was 5pm, so probably not a dinner date.
Ego opened the door, and saw you in your sloth state. You wondered if it’d be worth the hassle to explain the situation. “Cmon.” He grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you out your room.
“Wait- I should probably change-...”
“You’ll be fine. It’s nothing fancy.”
You went along with him (not that it was much a choice)
Ego opened the taxi doors for you, “Get in.” you did as he said and he sat beside you. You wondered if Ego had a drivers licence at all-
“Home depot.” he spoke to the driver
“HOME DEPOT??? DOES THAT EVEN COUNT AS A DATE??” but you said nothing as the car made it’s way over
Ego was staring at you, and spoke up suddenly “What’s wrong.” it came out more as a demand then a question
“Nothing nothing! I’m fine.”
He glared at you
“... I’m just sad I didn't get to wear the outfit I was planning, that’s all….” you laughed, waving it off
“You can wear it when we get back, can’t you? And you look fine, don’t worry about it.”
He put a hand on your thy (or if ur uncomfy, he just nudged you) and squeezed it gently. Ego would never admit he thinks your day to day/casual wear looked the best on you.
“Easy for you to say” you mumbled under your breath, “you wear the same thing everyday…”
Ego glared at you. Clearly displeased. 
Luckily for you, the car had come to a stop. You both exited the taxi as you said a quick “thank you” and Ego paid.
You really were at Home Depot.
Ego didn’t hesitate before going in, so you followed. He looked like he’d been here 20+ times, walking past all the isles to get to wherever he was going. Which turned out to be the ‘House Plants’ section
“Anri said I need to touch grass more often. This is basically the same thing.” he grabbed a potted succulent 
You looked at him, then the plant, then back at him. “He’s serious isn’t he-...” 
“Is there anything you want?” He looked at you, examining your body language 
“From Home Depot? Not really-” You thought to yourself if there was anything. 
“Here.” Ego grabbed another succulent, similar but shorter than his, “Now were matching.”
You tried to process what he just said, but he was already walking towards the cashier.
You’re MATCHING… with EGO. As you walked, the paint section caught your eye. A quick peak wouldn’t hurt! Ego wouldn’t even notice if you made it quick.
You ducked into the isle, there were many kinds of paint and other kid’s crafts. You picked up a pack of googly eyes and small bottles of paint. Your succulent deserved to be beautiful.
Alright, now time to go find Ego again. You turned around and- “AHHGHAH. HI EGO??” 
WAS HE RIGHT BEHIND YOU THIS WHOLE TIME????
He looked at the items in your hand, and took them in his own. “Is that all?”
You nodded as he headed back towards the exit. Ego paid for everything and led you back to a cab. “I assume you want to decorate your plant?”
“Yes that’s right” you nodded “Would you be interested in joining me…?”
Ego thought for a second, “Sure.”
You gave an amused smile, watching Ego do a kids’ craft was definitely something to look forward to.
“Great, just try to make it something that isn’t soccer themed, yea?”
“... You’re expecting too much.”
>Sending Love Letters
The BLLK vs U-20 game just ended a few days ago. And that’s great and all, but that also means your contract of partnership has expired. In other words- you’re done with Blue Lock.
Were you very happy about that? No, you’d miss seeing Anri and Ego everyday (definitely NOT mainly ego), the weirdly not terrible cafeteria food, you’d say your little succulent but you got to take him with you. 
The plant including all your other belongings had almost all been packed, you were ready to go at any moment.
And you would, soon. Right after you dropped off a letter to Ego. Which was Anri’s idea- something about “Ego’s never been so inlove!” and “You might never see him again!” 
Ignoring the first part, she did have a point. So here you stood, love letter in your hands, slipping under Ego’s office door.
You sighed. You really were ready to leave now. You did a last tour of the building, you had learnt your way around these cold halls. Whatever. It was time to go.
You threw on a bag and glanced at all your boxes, sitting stacked in your room. Anri said they’d ship it over, but you wondered if your little apartment could hold that many things.
Whatever, you’ll figure it out when you get home…
>Receiving Love Letters
The halls didn’t feel quite as scary as they used to, as you made your way one last time through them towards the exit. Taking some last moments to yourself, letting go was a part of life, you didn't expect to stay here forever. This was a good chapter of your life, you were happy to have been invited to Blue Lock in the first place. 
So why was it that when you were finally ready to go, THE DAMN DOORS WOULDN’T OPEN??
It’s not like you could pry them open, these were supposed to be automatic! “Automatic my ass….”
You frowned, it was not worth the loss of aura to try and break it open. Or maybe it was worth a shot… no one’s watching anyway right? Right… Wrong.
“[Y/N]” Ego stood behind you, oh god this man was everywhere you were. 
“Ego! The door won’t open…” you gestured awkwardly 
“I know. I turned it off to stop you from leaving”
What.!?
He handed you a folded piece of paper (that was clearly rushed from both the handwriting and ripped edges) and encouraged you to read it 
You gave him a confused look before opening it and skimming it quickly.
“Don’t go.... enjoyed our time ... I like you too…. reNEW YOUR CONTRACT.??” 
You mentally read to yourself, jaw on the floor. Maybe you should probably read the whole thing. Which you managed to do pretty quickly.
“Well? Does that make sense to you?” Ego asked, trying to understand your thoughts
You gave a hesitant nod, “Yea.. so does that mean my contract’s renewed? I get to continue working on BlueLock with you…?”
God that sounded cringe….
Ego nodded “If you’d like.”
You smiled, “I’d love to.”
BONUS
Anri watched from the security cameras “Ahhhrgh! Are they just going to ignore the fact that they both just declared their love for each other!!!”
She slumped down on the chair “God these two are hopeless…”
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A/N: Ego catchup! This was requested on wattpad, but thought i'd post it here too, bc im not sure if there's much x ego content... least theres NONE on wattpad LMAO. if you look for it, it give you reader x diego (from iceage) which i thought was dope.
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bippiti · 1 year ago
Text
505 cl16
where you reminisce on your first love
wc 3k
(starts in 2014, ends in 2024ish)
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i'm going back to 505
you rushed down the road, feet peddling as hard as they could as you biked down the street. your eyes glanced down to your watch, squinting before you read the time. great. you were going to be late.
you thought that was you’re biggest problem, and then a new one came crashing onto you, literally.
while you were busy checking the time, you failed too notice someone else running in your direction. you don't know what had them too preoccupied to notice you- but you could technically say the same thing about yourself so-
you were bought back to the moment by the stinging you started to feel on your knees, you hissed looking down and seeing red. ugh
you began to apologize, looking up and stopping mid sentence.
wow. he was pretty. really pretty
you slapped yourself mentally, wincing while standing up. it was definitely going to scar. you reached your hand down to help the mysterious boy up, who sharply inhaled when your hands met. he had scraped his hands up pretty bad when you guys collided.
"i'm so sorry again"
"you're completely fine, i should've been paying more attention" he said while laughing
he has nice laugh
"anyway, i think i should properly introduce myself, i'm charles le clerc" this time he was the one to extend his hand out
"y/n l/n, nice to meet you" you smiled as you shook hands
then you remembered what had gotten you into this mess. you checked your watch again. you were definitely late now.
"i'm so sorry charles but im running late to a painting class, i really need to go" you picked up your bike, kicking the dust off of it.
"wait i am too, are you going to mme. callarios?"
you looked back at him in shock. "how did you know"
he shook his head, "you're going in the wrong direction, since we're heading the same way mind if i show you?"
you didn't see why not, so he climbed in front of you and began to head towards your class
-
if it's a seven hour flight or a forty-five minute drive
the bike halted as you reached your destination. building 505. you stared at each other nervously before walking in. the class had started at 1pm, and it was nearing 2 when you arrived. granted, it was a 4 hour class but still.
you cringed internally as you felt all eyes on you when you opened the doors to the class.
"y/n, charles! great to see you. we've split up into partners, so you both will have to work together. decide who will be the painter and who will be the model for the first piece. switch in an hour and a half!" she explained quickly, ushering you both to the only empty table.
you both sat across from each other, and after a small game of rock paper scissors, you were adjusting in your seat getting ready to pose for the next 90 minutes.
-
when you look at me like that, my darlin', what did you expect?
you didn't know how you managed to keep a straight face, his stares were piercing into what felt like your soul. you knew that he had to be like this, he was painting you after all. but knowing that didn't help. after silently uttering some words of encouragement to yourself, you maintained a straight face.
after what felt like forever, you heard the timer go off, and with one last stroke of the brush charles was up and you were swapping places. you cracked your knuckles before sitting on the stool. this was gonna have to be the best painting you've ever done.
before you knew it you were hearing to now familiar ring as you finished off the details of his eyes. you stood up, backing away from the piece. not too bad you thought.
after everyone had finished, you went to the room across as they all dried. it was acrylic, so it wouldn't take too long. there were snacks and refreshments scattered throughout the space. grabbing a drink and seat, you started to learn more about charles. he had two brothers, one older and younger. his mom still cut his hair, you thought he might be embarrased but he showed it off proudly.
“all these years and she still hasn't given me a bad haircut”
“if my mom could cut hair like yours, i'd be getting it done by her too”
“you should come by her salon sometime, i think she'd like you”
“really?”
“yeah, she's out of town so next month when she's back”
with those plans made, you collectively went back into the painting room. you both swapped paintings and looked at them for a while.
you gauged his reaction, at first his face was blank and you were scared that you had made him look like a troll or something, but slowly a smile creeped up onto his face, he looked up to you.
“it's really good”
you smiled and looked down to yours, he had gotten your likeliness down to a t. he left clear marks and left the strokes visible.
looking up you saw him searching your eyes for a reaction, just like you had.
“you did so good, i love your painting style”
he seemed relieved when you said that, smiling. as everyone around you began to pack up and leave, you both exchanged numbers before grabbing your paintings and going your separate ways.
-
not shy of a spark
you had texted back and forth a lot since then, and soon enough you found yourself at the doorstep of his moms salon. after being welcomed in you sat down and showed her photos of the haircut you wanted. she nodded, and began to wet your hair
“charles talks about you a lot, you know”
“does he really” you said with a laugh
“he does, i think he likes you dear”
that shut you up, she smiled warmly
“at this age, love is everywhere, make sure you grab it while you can”
you left the appointment with amazing hair and a lot of questions, you didn't think he could possibly like you back. but now, who knows
the knife twists at the thought that I should fall short of the mark
-
I'm going back to 505
you walk into the painting studio, excited with the a dragonfruit in your hand. today was still life day, normally you found it boring but mme. callarios had let everyone bring their own fruit.
you spotted charles when you got in, and lifted your dragonfruit for him to see. he put his hand up, showing off the orange he had started to peel. he tore off a piece for you, and offered it once you got closer.
your hand was cramping as your eyes continued to squint at the pink fruit in front of you. you regretted picking dragon fruit barely half an hour in, the seeds and the outer skin were proving difficult to paint accurately, you glanced over to charles, his was coming along nicely. you ended up pushing through the ugly phase and were somewhat proud of the piece. it had definitely been your most challenging one so far
-
If it's a seven hour flight or a forty-five minute drive
you were biking to charles' place, over the weeks you had both become closer, and he wanted to cook for you. you were somewhat scared, charles didn't seem like michelin star material, but maybe he'd surprise you.
he did end up surprising you, but not in the way that you thought.
pasta was on the menu for the afternoon, and you sat on the counter as he went around getting all the ingredients ready. basil, pine nuts, garlic, and olive oil were all pushed onto an island before he began on the pasta. getting out the flour and egg, he began to knead the dough together.
he looked nice in moments like this, comfortable. you liked to think that maybe you could see more of him like this, when he's quiet and the silence isn't awkward. existing together in his apartment kitchen. once he was done cutting the dough into pieces, he salted the water and dropped the pasta in. he came over to you and you both began talking.
you ended up getting so immersed in the conversation that the pasta was forgotten- at least until it was too late. you glanced over to the stove, eyes widening as you saw smoke rising from the pan. you both jumped up and yanked it off the gas, bringing it to the sink. what was going to be amazing pasta was now a charred rock. you couldn't help but laugh before getting side eyed by charles.
"i guess we're going to have to order pizza instead"
you ended up binging some random show you found on netflix, and as a souvenir took home the rock of burnt pasta, you named it char, short for charles charcoal
-
In my imagination, you're waitin' lyin' on your side
charles had become a f3 driver now, and hadn't been in monaco for a bit. you watched all his races, and you were the first person he called after his first win in pau-ville. he was excited, and so were you.
you're feelings for him had kept growing, and you couldn't help it, no matter how much you tried. you loved everything about him, his eyes, and how they'd light up when he saw you, his smile, and the dimples that formed when he did. his hair, his voice, just him.
soon enough he was back in monaco and you were excited to see him.
you grabbed coffee and began walking around the streets, stopping at building 505, walking into the currently empty studio. you looked around some of the paintings before sitting on some stools.
you knew him too well now, 3 years of friendship will do that. he was nervous, when he bought his hand up to his face you had saw he had bitten his nails. you didn't bring it up, but before you could say anything he started to speak
"i've been trying to figure out how i should say this for the longest time. i've known for a while now, but it really hit me in pau. i couldn't have don't any of this without you, i don't even think i'd be who i am without you y/n. and now that i'm back i can' t handle not telling you. i like you, i really like you"
you were stunned for a minute, before you kicked back the stool you were sitting in and kissed him. the puzzles had fallen into place, you couldn't believe it.
he deepened the kiss, bringing his hand to your waist as you sat in his lap. your fingers ran through his hair, tugging as you began to roll your hips against his.
you pulled away, panting. smiling at him before you began to kiss him again, his hands roamed down to your shirt, tugging it up as he separated from you again. you raised your arms, and took his off as well. a silent beat skipped between you both and you laughed
"are we really about to do this right now"
"yeah, i think we are"
you pulled him closer to you once again, his tongue slipped int your mouth effortlessly and you almost moaned, god he knew how to make you melt.
soon enough, the rest of your clothes followed suit and you were on the cool tile floor. as his hand started to trace your inner thigh you grabbed his hand. he looked up, somewhat confused but before he could say anything you spoke,
'i've never done this before"
he relaxes almost immediately, and smiles down at you
"neither have i"
you weren't ashamed to admit you were shocked, sopmeone like him.. never? not once?
he could see the gears turning in his head and he spoke up
"there were girls now and then sure, but i always wanted it to be you, it's always been you honestly"
you couldn't see yourself rn, but you were sure you were giving im heart eyes by now.
"it was the same for me too actually" you said sheepishly
"was it really?
"yeah, it was" and with that you bought your hands up to his shoulder, flipping him onto the floor. you kissed him softly, turning his face to kiss along his jaw, his neck, going further down to his chest, then stomach. pausing for permission, after seeing his nod you pulled down, eyes widening as you saw it. well this was gonna be interesting
you left kisses on his tip, working your way down before you took him all in your mouth. he hit the back of your throat and you almost choked, but hearing the moans coming out of his mouth kept you going. you could feel him start to pulse, and before you could do anything else he was bringing you off of him, kissing your lips as he turned you around.
“can’t have you doing all the work can i cher?” he said as he pulled your underwear down, almost moaning when he looked down at you, all of you.
he traced his hands down your sternum, down to your waist and legs. spreading you open he dipped his face down.
you could feel his tongue inside you, pulsing before he started scissoring you open. he was good- too good at this. you don’t know if you could handle it. soon enough, he was back on top of you, kissing you gently as he lined himself up with your entrance.
he cleaned you up afterwards, he was quiet, soft. you could get used to this
-
but I crumble completely when you cry
it had been months since that night, you and charles had been going strong, but after he joined f2, something changed. his eyes no longer lit up when he saw you, he started buying things for you instead of making them. you’d wake up to your phone being full of messages, but none of them from him.
it hurt. he hurt.
it shouldn’t have come as a surprise when he called you, asking where you were.
you answered, mme. callarios’ place. he said he was going to be there soon.
you felt your heart drop, wether it was excitement or fear, you couldn’t tell.
you knew the minute he stepped through the door it was going to be bad. you could read him like a book. you composed yourself as he came closer, pressing quick kisses to the others cheeks, you painted a smile on your face and smiled at him.
his eyes were full of emotion, for the first time in months. it’s almost funny, you knew it was coming but the moment the words left his mouth you broke down
“i’ve been seeing someone else”
“i see”
at first it didn’t register, not really. a heartbeat later you felt the tears pricking at your eyes. you turned around trying to excuse yourself, but before you could take another step a sob escaped your lips. you started to cry. you couldn’t shut up, why couldn’t you just shut up? you could feel yourself gasping for breath, all the air in the world wasn’t enough for your lungs right now. you were getting lightheaded, knees turning shaky before ultimately giving up on you. the impact resonated around the empty room.
he stepped forward, kneeling down. his stupid, warm hands brushed up against your face, trying to wipe away your tears.
you couldn’t even push him off of you. you really were pathetic.
you managed to fight your way up, shaking and all but running out the door.
never again, you were never going to love anyone like that again
-
i’m going back to 505
you walked into a crowded room. your latest collection had been getting a lot of coverage in the media, and it was the last day it was up for the public. the pieces would be going to the individual buyers first thing tomorrow.
building 505. it no longer made a bitter taste seep into your mouth. it’s crazy to think a decade ago you were standing here painting him, how time flies.
the first few months were the worst. he was the only thing you could think of, you were a broken record. so naturally, you did the one thing that made you feel close to him again, painting. and it saved you
you could get out every thought you were too afraid to say out loud, every emotion you didn’t want to feel with simple strokes on canvas
you didn’t think anything would come of it, honestly. you were meant to go into investment banking, like your parents. the universe had other plans though
one of mme. callarios’ friends was a museum director, and took a liking to your pieces. he asked you to do some works on commission. word got around fast, and now you’ve made a name for yourself as an artist, in some ways all thanks to charles
charles. now he had his dream job, f1. working with the team he used to tell you about, the team he worshipped.
you were happy for him, sometimes you wonder if he was happy for you. you still think of him when you eat pesto, you still keep char in a jar under your bed, you have all of the paintings you made that summer in a closet collecting dust. there were pieces of yourself that you gave to him that will stay his even though you’re done.
none of that matters now though, you turn to someone who’s called your name and start explaining the piece they’ve asked about
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zaynesdesimc · 2 years ago
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Everything is fine -2
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A/n: aaaaah thank you so much for waiting for part 2! sorry it's been so long im having fever and i had electoral campaigning to do so i've been so busy :DDD enjoy some revenge and a moment&lt;3 not proofread so please excuse any mistakes
Part -1
The house is quiet when you enter. Spotless. As if it’s been frantically cleaned and the dust has been swept under the rug. You want to laugh. The bedroom door swings open but this time, he’s awake. He’s reading a book, his bottom half covered by the blanket. He looks up as you close the door and place your tote on the desk.
“Hey, baby.” he smiles and you let the corners of your mouth lift a little.
“I need some air.” you say and draw the curtains, unlatching the window and pushing it open. The night breeze is cool and the air in the room seems fresher. You stick your head out a little and breathe deeply, looking down.
You’re known to have the most absolute, shit eyesight, but even you can the the glow of red eyes a floor below you. You smile and draw back, Taking a towel from the cabinet and heading to the bathroom without a word, leaving your husband confused.
He can hear the shower turn on, and a few seconds later, the singular lamp in the roo switches off, leaving him in complete darkness. 
Miguel swears in frustration and huffs under his breath. His eyes come to focus as he gets used to the dark.
The only sounds are the rush of water in the shower, yet he feels the silence is eerie. The wind picks up, it’s almost howling, It sounds like a wail. His breathing quickens a little, and his eyes fall to the little expanse to the outside world.
He freezes. There’s something outside.
On the 18th floor. Staring at him. It’s eyes glow a deep red and he can see claws gripping the window sill. 
He wants to shout, to scream, to fucking move. But he can’t. 
The bathroom door swings open and he looks at you, then back at the window.
There’s nothing. No one.
“What’s wrong, honey?” your voice is soft and breezy, “It’s just the dark.” 
He looks almost manic, hunched over as he looked between you and the window, “There w-was something there. With red fucking eyes and it was staring at me.”
He looks at the window again and that’s when he shouts, “There!” he points and jumps off the bed, “Right there!”
You look to where he points and in the dark, you know he won’t see your smile. But Miguel will. 
You tilt you head, “Miggy, there’s nothing there. Are you okay?”
“Wha- how can you not see that?!”  he sputters and you walk over to him, turning his face away from the window, “Calm down, love. I think we should go to a doctor. In fact, I’ll make an appointment tomorrow, it’s the weekend anyway.”
 He takes your hands off his face and sighs, “I know what I saw.” he hugs you.
Your eyes flit to the window and you see one of the scarlet eyes shut in a wink. And then they disappear.
Your hand smooths his hair down, “We’ll be just fine.”
—---------------------
“I think it’s just stress, Miggy.” you say as you drive back from the clinic. He’d been subject to a number of tests by the doctors trying to find something wrong with one of the head scientists of the corporation that funded their work. Of course, they found nothing, but they did advise him to rest,  “After all, you spend so much time at work.” you shake your head in pity, “I’ll take off for a few days.”
“No!” he winces when you turn to look at him with an eyebrow raised, “I mean, no, you don’t have to. I’ll be alright. It’s just stress. You dob’t have to sacrifice your work.”
“Oh nonsense.” you wave him off, “It’s not a sacrifice to take care of the man I love. Unless, you want me to stay out of the house.” you chuckle, “You want me to stay out, honey?”
“No.” his voice breaks, “Of course not.”
A ting! Sounds from his phone and you peak at the notification thats from Dana.
“Is Dana coming over?”
He double takes, “How- nevermind. Yeah, she said she’d be visiting in an hour or so.”
You hum, with a small smile and swerve to the right, and he jerks and almost hits head on the window. You park, “Could you bring the groceries in?” you gesture to the shopping you’d gotten done when he was at the clinic. You smile and get out, leaving him behind.
He sighs and gets out, shutting the front seat door while opening the back one and taking out the paper bag. He notices a man standing opposite the car with his back turned to it.
He’s wearing the same clothes that Miguel’s wearing. And when he turns around he takes his shades off and he stares at him with red eyes. Miguel draws ina sharp breath.
If you ever see someone that looks identical to you, run away and hide.
His phone rings and he looks down at it and cuts the call. When he looks back him, the figure has disappeared. Shit. Shit.
Run away.
Hide.
He looks to his right, to where the entrance to the building is and he doesn’t even take a step before pain blooms across the back of his head. He doubles over with a groan but is pulled back by his hair and he can feel a sharp pain at his neck.
Then, darkness.
—-----------------------------------
“Miguel, I swear to god.” you pinch the bridge of your nose, “This wasn’t the plan!  How do I explain how he magically arrived here after fainting downstairs? You know the plan was that I dru-”
“Tell him a tall, nice man helped you.” he snarks and you resist the urge to throttle him. You settle for a glare that makes him chuckle.
“Relax, Sweetheart. He’ll believe you. Now I've healed the puncture with bacta spray and the wound is gone.” he gestures to the man currently spread out on your shared bed, “I need you to wake him up, tell him he passed out from exhaustion. I’ll take it from there.”
You look up at him, “Thank you. For wasting your time on this.”
His hand comes to rest on your shoulder and it tingles, “No time wasted, I assure you.” he nods reassuringly, “Now wake him up.” He rolls his shoulders and settles down on the plush couch you have that faces the bed.
You flick some water from the bottle you keep on the bedside table onto your husband’s face and when he wakes with a start, you fall into the role of the worried wife.
“Oh my god! Miggy! You’re finally awake!” you cup his face, “I was so worried! Are you okay?” His widened eyes look inyo yours and his furrowed eyebrows soften.
“I-I blacked out. There was this guy who looked like me and-” his gaze travels behind you to fall on the couch and he freezes at the sight of the menacing man staring at him with those fucking red eyes. 
Run away and hide.
“Baby.” he looks back at you, “Do not  look back.”
The room is silent. You can see Miguel in the reflection of your husbands eyes. Like the snap of a branch, the doorbell rings and youre forced to turn around, much to your husband’s protests. 
You lock eyes with Miguel and look back at your husband with incredulous eyes, “Miguel, are you crazy? There is nothing there!” 
“Can you not see that?” he stretches his hand out to make a point and Miguel scowls.
“I can see absolutely bullshit!” you raise your voice.
The bell interrupts whatever he was going to say and take a deep breath. 
“I’m assuming that’s Dana?” you raise and eyebrow and he nods, “I’ll get it.”
“No! Don’t leave me with that fucking thing!” he points to where Miguel sits and then at you. You groan.
“Then you go and open the door!” 
“FIne!” he storms out, wobbling just a little. You hear the door open and your stomach drops when you head Dana’s voice.
“Hey.” Miguel says and you look down, “You’re going to be okay.”
You nod, “I’m going to be fine.”
He gestures to the door and you steel yourself before stepping out, a smile making its way onto your face as you spread your arms and greet Dana who replies with her high pitched voice. Even your husband seems to be in a better mood and you can’t help but remember the hologram.
“I love you” he kissed her neck softly and she giggled.
“Hey!” Dana says your name, “You okay?” 
“Youre going to be okay.”
You snap out of you daze, “Yeah, sorry. Long day.” you smile again and she pouts almost condescendingly.
“Awwww, I’m sure you’ve had a tiring day. Writing is such a hard profession.” she says airily.
You grit your teeth, “Tea?”
“Yeah honey, I think we’d like that.” Miguel smiles.
As you walk to the kitchen, and get out the ingredients, Miguel recounts the events of the day to Miguel and she scrunches her nose and laughs. She, too, says it’s just stress. Only this time, he listens. You swallow hard and go back to boiling the tea.
The apartment is built in an industrial style, and very much an open plan. The design is such that Miguel can see you from the bedroom. He can see your hands flying to open and close cabinets and crushing cardamom and washing tea cups. Living a life so different from the one you live with him.
The teacups clink as you place the tray on the coffee table. They take the cups and sip the tea with relish, like they always do. Miguel sighs contently and Dana groans with satisfaction.
“Have fun.” you grin, “I gotta shower. I’ll see you in a bit.” you whip around to speed walk awkwardly to the bedroom. Cursing at yourself inwardly because really? That’s the best excuse you could find?
Paces away from the bedroom, your eyes meet Miguel’s. The variant of your husband. This variant who had patched you up, and got you food and held you and was currently waiting for you and wasting his time on your petty revenge.
You breathe from your mouth so they can’t hear the sniffles you’re trying to hide as you shut the door.
```````````````````````````````
The door shuts with a click as you step in and in five seconds, Miguel curses his stupid enhanced hearing and winces. You give him a sad smile and he moves to wrap his arms around you. Your hands go around his neck and you look up at him. After a few moments, his head dips, and he’s so close. So close that the both of you are breathing the same air. Noses nuzzling each other, cheeks rubbing against the other and lips leaving their light feather touch on the other. 
He can hear the small sniffle you try to hide and he does the only thing he can think of to make you think of anything else. His head hides in the crook of your neck and he breathes in your scent. He relishes the small sounds that leave you. He lets them envelop his senses, so he doesn’t have to hear whatever is going on in the next room. His hands travel the expanse of your back, fingers teasing under the hem of your shirt.  It’s a messed up dance you’re both in. He knows that. But, god, you’re so soft and-
Oh.
He breathes out a moan. Your lips are on his neck, gently mouthing at flesh. Your eyelashes leave whispers of kisses in their wake that make him lurch forward and pick you up. Your legs wrap around his waist like it’s an instinct.
The windows bathe you in the setting sunlight. And you look ethereal.
But. You’re not her. You’re not his love. Her smile was different, her hair shorter. Her eyes are softer. His head wracks with guilt but then he looks at you again. You’re doing the same. 
He can hear the laughter from outside, but it’s like time stands till as the both of you look at each other. Searching for what is missing. Using the other for their own comfort.
Like a reverent follower, he gazes at you. Like you’re his saint. He wants to say the words. To tell you to use him. So that the both of you can have some semblance of comfort in each other. Your head dips down and your lips brush his and his eyes shut. Succumbing to the feeling.
Two thuds are heard and you pull back, “That was fast.”
“Wait, you used the drug?” his eyes widen and you smile.
“Well, what’s left now but to take them to HQ?” you chuckle.
The hall is silent. There is no laughter.
He smiles.
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mins-fins · 2 years ago
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all flights are delayed !
"i like to call myself a pretty man connoisseur.."
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synopsis: your sad to say it, but you don't have much going on in your life. you have a very time consuming major, just a few friends, barely any time to go out, and spend most of your free time either a: working, or b: sleeping. so for once, when you finally have the friday off, and your dragged off to go watch a football game between a rival school of yours, you really do wish you were anywhere else. somehow though, it turns out to be one of the best things to happen to you, because a charming oreo–haired musical theater major from your rival school just happens to saunter his way into your life, you didn't expect to fall in love in your junior year, but your also not complaining!
pairing: xiao dejun x male!reader
genre: college au, strangers to friends to lovers, musical theater major!xiaojun x health science major!reader, fluff, like the lightest of angst, lowkey fast burn 😖
warnings: swearing, mentions of drinking, kissing(?), gay people, a little miscommunication, reader having a crisis over oreo xiaojun, probably a lot of repetitive phrases, huang guanheng is EVERYWHERE
word count: 12.8k
notes: OKAAAAAAAY hello! now in the beginning i really did enjoy writing this but after like the fourth scene its all so disgusting and jumbled up but i am also very proud of myself because this is the longest ever fic i have ever written (it is all xiao dejuns fault), actually it is ALL of nct's fault because why do i have a bunch of 8k word fics of so many nct members..😢 anyway if this seems any rushed or makes absolutely no sense at times its because im tired and i worked extra today but it doesn't really matter because constructive criticism is good (i shouldn't even publish this tbh) but there is a first for everything! enjoy!
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YOU'VE NEVER BEEN A FOOTBALL FAN. now you know that might be a little of a sour opinion, especially to the men in your family, but it's just never been a sport you enjoy. it is just a little fun to watch, especially when drunk, because the sight of men in tight ass clothes running around a field chasing a ball is possibly one of the funniest things you think your drunk mind has ever seen. which is why now— in the stands, listening to the loud shouts and screams from your schoolmates, and rival scholars, you feel as if your ears have just been popped.
after all the days of working, and doing nothing but schoolwork, you were glad to have the rest of the friday off. there was nothing else you wanted to do but put on an oversized sweater, make a bowl of ramen and rewatch gossip girl for the seventy fifth time already (yes, you keep count), but no— guanheng decided he was going to drag you out of the dorm to watch stupid football game, one about "school spirit" or whatever, you weren't paying attention to him when he decided to go on his ramble, and now he's abandoned you once again! probably off to go talk to one of his 1000 other friends or something.
you almost consider leaving, but then you witness the amount of people you'd have to maneuver through, the amount of excuse me's you'd have to utter, the amount of pushing you'd endure as you tried to make your way through the crowded stands, besides, you can't leave without guanheng, your pretty much the only person responsible for keeping him alive at this point.
so you somehow suck it up and manage to stick around. your ears are practically on fire right now, and you desperately want to take off your shoes because of how they are poking you at the moment. you almost feel like your being pressed together by all the people in the stands, as if walls are slowly pushing in and crushing every single bone in your body.
"that team is doing horribly.." you mutter to yourself in an attempt to calm your crazy mind.
"i know, we suck".
at first you think you've made up the voice, because in the past hour and a half all you've heard is shouting, cheering, and loud music blasting on your ears, no one has made any attempt to talk to you since guanheng up and left you alone in the stands, so the response almost seems like muddled up words created by your brain as a response—
but it's not.
someone actually did respond to you, and in a split second there is a completely new person standing beside you, also observing the game but not looking as pleased to be there. when you do glance to your left, you come across possibly the most beautiful boy— no, person, you come across the most beautiful person you think you've ever seen in your twenty years of living, for once it feels like everything stops.
you are not the kind of person that just.. does that. now you've met tons of pretty people, you've met so many people that you could definitely say are so beautiful they could be displayed in a museum as an art exhibit, but never in your twenty years of living have you ever seen yourself go silent at the sight of a beautiful person— your brain feels like it's malfunctioning, you're not exactly sure what to say, you open your mouth but no words come out, and you almost consider punching yourself because you probably look like a complete idiot right now.
"oh? you don't go here?"
that's what you decided to say? of all things you could've said, of course he doesn't go to your school, he just implied that the other team belonged to his school, why would that be the best thing to say out of everything else?
the stranger looks up, then he laughs, and your not sure how you keep your composure. "oh no, i go to vixsith" he replies, using his thumb to point backward, though he's not pointing at anything in specific, just pointing to point. you're not sure why you pick up on that, or why you're even watching where his hands are going anyway.
"your insulting your own team?" you inquire, and he laughs even harder at your question, covering his mouth with his hand. "this is about school spirit, have faith in them" you joke, and all he does is continue laughing, crossing his arms as he tries his best to calm himself down.
"i'm being honest, the only person on that team who knows how to play is mark, he deserves better" he remarks, eyes focused on the player he just named. he then seems to have a random realization and turns to you once again. "i'm dejun by the way" he holds out his hand for you to take, and you just blink at it like an idiot, before coming back to your senses and quickly shaking his head.
"y/n".
at the sound of your name, he seems to have yet another realization. he points at you and narrows his eyes. "we have a mutual friend don't we?"
at the question, you narrow your eyes, cogs turn in your brain as you think about who he could possibly be referring to, then it comes to you—
"guanheng".
the two of you say his name in unison, and the two of you both try to stifle your laughs as the realization dawns on you. "he knows everyone i swear" you mutter, and dejun snorts, looking away from you to laugh. "even from other schools.."
"oh we go way back" dejun responds, moving his hair out of his face. "middle school actually" he adds, and your eyes widen, as if your shocked, of course guanheng has friends from way back when, why are you surprised?
you don't feel as surprised as you do lucky..
"was he still as inhumanely flexible as he is now?"
dejun laughs again, he does that a lot. "yes, yes he was".
"he talks about you a lot.. you know" dejun comments out of the blue, tucking his hair behind his ear. "he basically lives with us, and if he's not sleeping over we always assume he's with you".
"oh so that's why he always just.. appears and disappears.."
"yeah that's kind of his thing" dejun scrunches his face, looking bored by the lack of action happening on the field. "i can never find him unless he directly comes to me first" he doesn't look at you as he says those words, but you're very much staring at him the whole time.
you almost feel like a creep in a way, you want to punch yourself in the face again for continuing to stare at him. you blink a couple times before turning your face away, trying to correctly articulate your thoughts.
"both teams suck".
you only say those words because you want him to continue talking, you want to hear him talk, it's nothing that crazy, having a conversation with him is just so intriguing to you for some reason..
"well yeah— but you guys get more training so you have an advantage" he comments, narrowing his eyes at the field, arms crossed over his chest. "the guys on our team have no idea what their doing".
"do you like football?" you ask, not sure why your so interested in his answer, you just are, you have no explanation for your sudden intrigue of this charming oreo–haired boy that goes to your rival school.
your much too distracted by how gorgeous he is to worry about giving yourself an explanation.
dejun laughs again, shaking his head. "not really, my dad does, so i just know things because of all his screaming and shouting" he replies, arms still crossed over his chest. "i'm not really a sports person, i do musical theater for pete's sake".
"oh so you sing?" you don't mean to ask another question, you're worried that you might be bothering dejun with your constant inquiries, but he actually seems glad, excited that someone is asking him about his major.
"well yeah" he responds, his smile growing. "all things theater, i write the songs, i act the parts, i play instruments, sometimes i even take offstage roles instead of my usual onstage ones".
he fiddles with his fingers, picking his nails. you assume, from his mannerisms, that he doesn't know what to say because most people don't really ask him about his major, or what he does, it's like he's elated that you even asked him.
"what about you?" dejun instead asks, veering away from the topic of his major and instead making yours the main topic of discussion. "what do you do?"
"health science" you say the words as if it pains you to, like it's the single most uninteresting thing you've said this whole interaction. "i know, it's boring".
dejun laughs again; "no no! i didn't say that!" he waves his hands in a disagreeing manner as he chuckles at your words. "i just don't meet a lot of people interested in pursuing science.."
"it's more of the health aspect than science actually" you mutter, and dejun just looks even more interested in what you have to say now. "but science is a big part of it so.."
"you must be very smart then" dejun remarks, smiling as the two of you make eye contact.
"i'm alright" you just say, finally pulling down your formerly rolled up sweater sleeves now that the air outside has begun cooling down. you only lightly shiver, and you glance back at dejun one more time..
"where do you think guanheng is?" he asks, clearing his throat as he scours the still full and lively bleachers, searching for your friend. "off doing whatever he does.."
you're currently very distracted, and you don't even realize what's going on when you snap out of whatever daze you were having and everyone is suddenly standing up and cheering like there's no tomorrow.
dejun looks over at you, and he can clearly see how confused you are because he laughs for one last time. "you guys won!" he somehow manages his voice over the roar of the crowd. "congrats!"
he's yelling, but he's not exactly loud, he still manages to sound so gentle whilst yelling at you.
"thanks!" you blurt out as a reply, and you feel like a complete idiot for that, but dejun smiles, so you don't feel all that embarrassed.
the game is over, and people are going to start to leave soon. dejun looks back, spotting a group he recognizes, then he looks over at you, a smile on his face. "i've gotta go now" he says, almost disappointed in a sense. "it was nice meeting you y/n!"
you nod, not knowing what to say. "yeah! you too!"
you too? you too?? is that what you say y/n!?
dejun gives one more beautiful smile before heading off, and you blink, having absolutely no idea what just transpired in those few minutes.
holy shit i forgot to ask—
but you couldn't— because he was gone, gone in such a flash you couldn't even spot his oreo hair in the crowd.
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YOU FORGOT TO ASK FOR HIS NUMBER. YOU FEEL SO STUPID, your not even sure why you wanted to ask him that, but in the back of your mind that was the question you were preparing yourself to ask from the moment he told you his name, that he was friends with guanheng, the moment the two of you began laughing about your majors and stuff like that. the whole interaction with a pretty oreo–haired musical theater major at a football game is all that you were thinking about last night, as you tried to find pretty much anything else to think about as you struggled to sleep.
how did you forget to ask him for his number? you want to smash your face into your computer screen because of how stupid you are. you said "you too!" like a fucking idiot, but maybe you were just too distracted, he was smiling at you with that beautiful smile and staring at you with his absolutely gorgeous fucking eyes, how could you even think coherently whilst a beautiful man (from a whole other school but who cares?) was staring at you with his pretty brown eyes like you were the only person in the world?
okay your pushing it now..
but there is just something, something about him that drew you in, your not sure why you were so adamant on getting to know him, but he was just so— you can't explain it right now! you are currently very sleep deprived and also moody because of your disappearing roommate that always decides to appear at the worst times.
you don't remember the last time you ever got an actual eight hours of sleep, these days that seems like a dream more than a reality, but guangheng is just never tired. he's somehow always up, doing something, hanging out with people, he never sits down in once place and just stays still.
when he walks into the room, hands on his hips and gaze immediately focused on you, you barely bat an eye at him, just spare him a quick glance, noticing how pissed off he looks. you scour your mind for an explanation as to why he must be mad now, probably something someone said, or he got into yet another argument with one of his classmates, your not even sure anymore, you don't know where he is half the time.
"could you do me a favor?"
you almost laugh out loud, not at him, but at the idea that he wanted you to do him a favor. at this point, he probably owes you thousands of favors considering how many you do for him, but he seems upset, and you don't have any of that pettiness leftover to ignore him, so you move your eyes to look over at him.
"why should i?"
okay— you lied, your still just a little petty, but you totally have every right to be! guanheng deserves just some sass from you after disappearing each and every time he decides to take you out somewhere.
guanheng blinks, then he pulls out the signature guanheng frown, a sad stupid frown he always makes when he wants to persuade you into doing something. you're not sure how you've even ever fallen for that signature frown, maybe it's because he's just so great at looking sad, at looking upset, he somehow always manages to make you feel bad for him, and therefore, end up doing the favor for him.
"because i'm your best friend, your roommate, and you love me so much" guanheng smiles wide, like he just found out he won the lottery, and clasps his hands together as he rocks back and forth on his heels.
"i don't know.." you mumble, looking back at your computer screen. it's a saturday, you have no classes saturday, you can just sit down, relax, be the absolute lazy motherfucker you were put on this earth to be. "i don't feel like going out today".
guanheng huffs, crossing his arms. "one last favor! just one! then i'll get off your back!"
"your horrible at following your promises, heng" you comment absentmindedly, your tone is much meaner than you intended, and guanheng's gasp is enough to tell you that he indeed takes offense to those words. "what? i'm not lying".
"y/n!" oh great, he's whining now. "i will get you anything i can, anything! just this one favor! please?"
your about to say no again— but then it's like a lightbulb goes off in your head, and you get a spectacular idea. anything? he did say anything, and he can give you something you want.
the number of a pretty boy preferably!
you let out a sigh, and guanheng knows what that sigh means, it means you agree. "fine, i'll do you this favor, but this is the last one".
guanheng's smile brightens, and he cheers like a kid that just got the best christmas present one can receive. "thank you! thank you! thank you! i love you!" he kisses your cheek, and skips off to another room.
"get your jacket!" he shouts, already rooms away from you, so he has to shout.
"what?"
"get your jacket! were leaving!"
you furrow your eyebrows at his words, but you don't say anymore, because you did agree to do this favor for him after all.
so, without questioning it more, you get up and go grab your jacket.
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"SO WHEN YOU SAID A FAVOR..?" you don't continue on with your sentence, pausing to let out a breath as you shove your hands into the pockets of your jackets. guanheng looks over at you, and he just chuckles at the unreadable expression on your face. when you agreed to do this favor for him, you didn't know it included leaving your dorm and having to be dragged out to yet another unfamiliar place. "did you forget to mention the fact that we'd have to leave the school?" you finally finish, eyes focused and narrowed on your friend, who again, smiles at you with that signature guanheng smile.
"it's a saturday, most of us don't have classes anyway, they won't question it".
"is that supposed to make me feel better?" you ask to yourself more than to guanheng, but he hears you anyway, and that results in a snicker from him. despite that, he doesn't respond to your silent question, making you frown just the slightest.
"stop pouting".
"i'm not pouting" your quick to rebut, rolling your eyes at his words. you almost bump into him when he suddenly stops, and your about to yell at him again for being stupid when he places a finger on your mouth.
he knocks on the door in front of him, not paying attention to the burning glare your currently sending him.
"i'll bite off your finger" you threaten, moving forward and pretending your about to do that. guanheng squeaks and quickly moves his fingers away from your lips, a flash of true fear in his eyes. all you do is give him a menacing and totally not threatening smile.
"psycho.." he whispers, he looks like he's about to say more, but the door opens, so he closes his mouth and turns around.
"come on!"
he grabs your wrist and drags you into the dorm, and you felt your heart rate increase. maybe he knew these people, but you sure didn't! what if they thought you were weird? you want to pull him back and tell him that he shouldn't just drag you into some strangers dorm, but he is much too distracted to even notice your uneasiness.
"i've returned!" guanheng yells, letting go of your hand to place his hands on his hips, as if he was proud of himself.
"can you slam the door on him!?"
"ten! come to me!"
before you can ask him what the hell is going on, he sprints down the hallway, you assume to go after this ten person, you just blink, shoving your hands into your pockets as you begin to rock back and forth on your heels.
"hello stranger!" an unfamiliar voice exclaims, you look up and come face to face with a pink–haired boy with a bright smile.
"hello" you reply politely. "i like your hair" you immediately remark, pointing at his hair like an idiot because you don't want to touch it and make him uncomfortable.
his face lights up, as if you were a millionaire that just gifted him a life changing amount of money. it was as if no one ever told him that his hair was pretty before, or that they liked it. he jumps up and squeals, excited. "thank you! ten said it was stupid!"
you furrow your eyebrows, then chuckle. "what? no it's very pretty, pink suits you!"
"hah! i told you guanheng! pink does suit me!" he yells down the hall, and you can hear the small shout of rebuttal that guanheng responds with from all the way down the hall. "thanks! only a few people actually noticed that i dyed my hair".
you laugh again, okay he is very funny, you like him!
"oh! i'm yangyang! the nicest person who lives here!" he introduces himself in the same fashion a reality tv star would, and quickly grabs your hand to shake it. you don't complain, just laugh again as he vigorously shakes your hand.
"y/n, it's nice to meet you".
he gasps, recognizing your name. "oh you're the famous y/n! guanheng always talks about you, for a long time i was convinced he was in love with you!"
"why are you tarnishing my brand!?" guanheng shouts again, sounding even more pissed off than he did before. "huh!? liu yangyang!?"
yangyang shakes his head, ignoring guanheng's loud shouts and flapping his hand, mocking him. you laugh as you watch him mock the other, who has absolutely no idea what he's doing right now.
"you have a project to do!" another unfamiliar voice shouts.
yangyang gasps again, suddenly looking stressed. "fuck yeah— um!" he turns around and reaches over to grab his laptop, then he turns back to you and gives you a smile.
"yeah, my apologies" you just wave it off, urging him to keep going. "um i'm doing a project where i have to interview people on their majors.. trust me i don't know either, but! i've interviewed like the whole school already, and i need one more person.."
"and that person is me?" you ask, but you already know the answer to that question, yangyang nods, much more quickly than he seemed to intend to.
"yes!" he exclaims, but then he clears his throat. "but only if you want to, i don't want to force you into anything you don't want to do—"
"no no no it's fine!" you cut into his sentence, shaking your head. yangyang, again, looks elated that you agreed.
okay so this was the favor guanheng wanted you to for him! (not for him necessarily— but his friend). he could've just told you about this straight up instead of being vague about it, it wasn't even that burdening of a favor, not like the other ones you've done for him.
"guanheng! why don't you bring him around more often? he's better than you are!" yangyang yells again, probably for the nth time that hour.
guanheng doesn't answer, but you knows he's pouting, you can just sense it at this point, you call it your "roommate instincts".
"oh hi y/n".
now that's a voice you recognize, and you almost don't believe your eyes when the one person that kept you up all night walks into the room and smiles as he sees your figure. "dejun, hi" you smile back at him, hoping you don't sound as awkward as you feel.
dejun looks so so pretty, as he always does. he fiddles with the necklace hanging around his neck, his eyes lingering on you for an unspecified amount of time.
"ten hit me with his shoe" guanheng suddenly storms into the room, arms crossed over his chest. "asshole.." he mutters under his breath, huffing like some sort of baby.
dejun then laughs, covering his mouth with his hand, and that causes you to laugh, turning your head to the side as to not make it obvious.
guanheng exchanges glances between the both of you, a prominent glare in his eyes, but then the look in his eyes changes, and he points at the two of you. "you two have met?" he asks.
dejun pauses, still humored by the previous words said by guanheng, and your brain almost malfunctions once again. "i— um" great, you just sound so natural and not awkward.
"we met at the game" dejun immediately says, saving you the awkwardness of having to collect your words in your brain. you thank whatever god or deity up there for dejun's quick response, and he just flashes you that familiar pretty smile. "yesterday, you know, while you were off doing who knows what.."
guanheng gasps, looking at dejun like he'd just cursed his entire bloodline. "you— your just such a bitch! you know!?"
"ow! don't punch me! i'm fragile!"
guanheng lands one more punch on his shoulder, and it gets one more squeak out of dejun, who jumps once again. "i don't care, your horrible".
yangyang blinks, probably already used to their little quarrels. he then turns to you, just shaking his head as they continue to whisper–argue. "so, what do you major in?"
it's almost like you totally forgot, his project, the thing that guanheng dragged you here to help him with. "health sciences, i take courses in everything related to healthcare and like— half actual science courses?"
"so your looking to work in healthcare?"
"yeah basically, i've already taken courses in emergency service's, becoming a paramedic is my top option!"
yangyang gasps at your words, he looks over at guanheng, then quickly back at you. "are you single?" he asks, again with the same quickness.
dejun snorts, hitting guanheng as begins laughing hard. guanheng scrunches his nose, staring at yangyang like he's crazy. "what kind of question is that!?"
"what? that is a totally valid question to ask!" he exclaims, crossing his arms. "it's for my project! clearly!" he lies.
"your— oh my god, unbelievable".
"so are you?" yangyang asks again, looking at you with suspenseful eyes. he is very much interested in your answer it seems.
your finally finished with your laughing fit, and nod, still very amused. "yes i am, i'm single".
"good, this is very important information".
yangyang gives you a giddy look, and dejun just continues to laugh.
you're not sure why your so focused on him though..
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YOU AGAIN, HAVE NO LUCK SLEEPING that night, and after the first hour and a half of tossing and turning, you gave up on trying to chase slumber you knew you wouldn't be able to catch. you assumed that the longer you stared at your computer screen, the quicker you'd get tired and the quicker your eyes would become heavier, but no! it's now almost two in the morning and you still aren't sleepy in the tiniest bit, you didn't know insomnia got this bad, if you knew this prior to coming back to school this year, you would've bought more of those sleeping pills. you lean your chin onto your hand as your computer continues playing audio from a random episode of brooklyn nine–nine.
the millions of thoughts rampant in your mind were probably distracting you, rendering it impossible to sleep, and also rendering it impossible to focus, seeing as your just looking around your room, which is pretty much boring you considering all you've been doing for the past thirty minutes is looking around your own room.
you think your gonna bore yourself to death, you pretty much prepare to stay up for the next five hours until your alarm rings and startles you out of your daze (which has happened way too many times for your comfort), but then your phone rings.
it's almost two in the morning, who exactly is calling you at this time? who knows that you're awake at 1:56 in the morning and decided to call you? they probably knew you'd pick up..
and you know who it is— it's so obvious.
dejun.
you don't mean to pick up your ringing phone as fast as you do, you want to punch yourself in the face for how desperate you seem, and you almost don't answer the phone because you feel so embarrassed. "hello?"
"hi!" dejun sounds way too joyous for someone who is sleep deprived, and up at 1:57 am. "sorry? was that too loud?"
"no no your fine" you reply, even though the speaker is on, guanheng can quite literally sleep through anything, there was one time the fire alarm was going off for a good ten minutes and he didn't even budge. "guanheng is a pretty heavy sleeper".
"he's lucky, i can't sleep" the sound of shuffling on the other line resonates in your ears, and dejun huffs, sounding frustrated. "you were the only person i assumed would be awake".
you snicker. "why is that?" you inquire, he was right, of course, but you just wanted to hear his reasoning, and also wanted him to keep talking.
you really like dejun's voice for some reason, it just scratches the right part of your brain. in these past two days you realized that you like a lot of things about dejun, many more things than you thought you might.
"your major has the word 'science' in it so i just assumed the amount of sleep you get is slim to none".
now that gets another laugh out of you, you laugh much more than you intend to, but also— it's dejun, and you can't resist the loud laugh that escapes your lips.
oh your such a desperate little bitch—
"well you'd be correct" you respond, humming as you pick at your nails. "at this point sleeping is beginning to make me tired".
there's a long pause, and your worried you made everything more awkward, because you don't hear anything from the other line. for a moment, you're almost convinced dejun hung up on you, but before you can speak he beats you to it.
"i can keep you company until you get tired" he immediately suggests, and you almost choke on your spit when he says that. "i don't mind".
you go silent, feeling as if all logical thoughts in your mind have suddenly disappeared into the air. you might sound like a complete loser right now but that was just so sweet of him to suggest, you smile much too wide for your own comfort, but you don't even think about that, because your just so charmed by the words.
"you are.." you pause, clasping your hands together as you think about what words to say next. "yeah yeah, that's fine" you finally continue, your new words having no connection to the previous ones you previously said, you just hope dejun doesn't notice.
"good! it would've been awkward if you said no" dejun giggles, and you just can't get over how cute he sounds. "plus, i wouldn't want you to be tired in the morning, lord knows how much you do in a day.."
you feel an unfamiliar fluttering feeling in your stomach, because he is so considerate? he wants to help you, he's just being so nice to you at.. two! two in the morning! you bite down on your bottom lip, hoping it doesn't bleed from how hard your tooth drives into it.
"aww, you care about me that much?" you ask, just wanting to hear him talk again. you feel like a teenage girl giggling and kicking her feet over a high school crush, except you can't kick your feet and giggle because then dejun would know.
"okay, be quiet, don't make me hang up".
"okay okay don't do that!" you say, totally meaning to sound as desperate as possible this time. "if your not here i won't ever fall asleep".
you hear something similar to a squeal on the other line, as if dejun had heard your words and just freaked out.
the realization honestly boosted your ego.
"you— you suck!"
"you offered to help me jun, don't get like this now!"
you're not sure how long it goes on for, but you swear you two laugh all night while on the phone.
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"SO WHOSE THE GUY?" the question is asked so abruptly that at first, you assume you heard your friend wrong. when you look up, he stares at you with that deadpanned gaze, and that's when you realize he's completely serious. you chuckle at the realization that your friend is sure that your in love with someone (well you are— your just surprised that he figured out so quickly). "what guy? there's a guy?" you tilt your head, acting as if you have no idea what he could possibly be talking about. you giggle as you watch him slowly get even more irritated by your answer.
"you always come in here looking a little less miserable each day" chenle observes, leaning forward as he narrows his eyes at you. "someone is making you excited to live life?"
"do i always come in here looking miserable?" you ask, completely diverting your attention from chenle's previously asked question, which makes him pout.
"yep!" renjun exclaims, sitting beside you, he crosses his legs in his chair and presses his lips into a thin line. "so! who is he?"
the two seem way too excited to know about your never talked about before crush on dejun. now— you didn't know it was so obvious that you were now smitten for this new guy, you're usually the friend that's known from straying the furthest away from love, you don't remember any people you've legitimately liked that weren't elementary school crushes..
so yeah, your friends totally had every right to be surprised, because your absolutely smitten for a man and they just want to know who this man that is making you so happy is!
you hate that you give in so easily. "he's one of guanheng's friends.." you mutter, picking at your nails, looking down to make sure you don't witness renjun and chenle's reactions with your own two eyes.
renjun gasps, sounding like those ladies at the hair salons that just heard the juiciest gossip. "ooh! who? does he go here? do we know him? is he pretty?"
chenle looks over at renjun like he's crazy, that familiar judging stare in his eyes as he watches renjun lean closer to you with a totally not creepy smile on his face. "don't you think your acting a little too interested in this?"
"i just want to know!" renjun shouts, playfully glaring at the younger. he then turns back to you, and you assume his cheeks must be hurting from how hard he seems to be smiling. "tell me please?"
"he's— he's just your run of the mill pretty guy who is nice, and smart, and absolutely adorable who tells horrible jokes that still end up being funny in some way and he has a pretty laugh and i just love his voice, and talking to him, and, i can't even explain it because it'll sound stupid!"
"you sound like a psycho" chenle immediately says, laughing at you like you just confessed to an atrocious crime against humanity. you sink into your chair, slumping towards the side.
"aww! the pessimistic y/n is in love!" renjun squeals, again, like those women at the hair salon who just heard the juiciest gossip. he grabs your arm and shakes you vigorously, causing you to get dizzy in the slightest bit. "i can't believe i've lived to see this day!" he shouts, continuing to shake you as you can't properly get out your cries for help.
"renjun you're gonna kill him" chenle pinches the older in the arm, making him yelp and jump, he giggles as he witnesses the glare the older male sends him, his crushing grip remains around your arm, but you don't even mention at this point, because at least he's not shaking you anymore.
"sorry" he remarks, definitely not sorry as he squeezes your arm once again, beginning to get overly excited. "it's just.. exciting you know?"
"it's exciting that i'm in love with someone?" you raise an eyebrow, and though you expect renjun to respond, chenle quickly does.
"yep! you'll finally be gone!"
his cheer results in a gasp of offense from you, and all chenle does is giggle in victory.
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THE ONE THING YOU'VE LEARNED FROM THE now excessive amounts of times you've hung around guanheng's other friends is that they're loud, they are all really loud (even sicheng! who, for a good majority of the time, is always quietly staring at his friends with clear concern in his eyes), even if they don't mean to, they're somehow always either yelling, shouting, or making some sort of scene. they're all just naturally hilarious, like comedians that don't realize they're comedians because they're just being themselves. in the past few weeks, it's like you spend more time with these people that don't go to your school in comparison to people that actually go to your school and that you can see easily.
but if you're being honest, you don't really mind that your spending all your free time with them, because they are indeed very fun to be around (and you get to see dejun much more regularly, which is something you rather enjoy), and because life would be insanely boring if guanheng didn't decide to drag you out of the dorm every other day to go do stupid things with his friends that go to a whole other school.
"you are such a cheater! i won fair and square!"
"you did not! your the cheater! sicheng is my witness!"
sicheng, who was not listening to anything either ten or yangyang had to say, looked over at the younger with a look of concern washed over his features. he blinks as he's suddenly put on the spot, smiling nervously as the youngest stares intensely at him, waiting for his answer. "uh.. i— i don't know".
his delivery makes you burst out laughing, and you cover your mouth with your hand as to not make yourself look like an absolute fool. you don't even realize that you picked up on one of dejun's habits, you might be spending too much time around him..
actually, forget that! there is no such thing as spending too much time around dejun, and that might make you sound like a "simp" but you don't care.
you've fallen, and you've fallen hard.
"okay.." guanheng presses his lips into a thin line, ignoring the way ten and yangyang now begin discussing the logistics of cheating in card games, unfortunately dragging poor sicheng into their argument. he turns to dejun and scoots closer to him. "can you do me a favor?"
dejun groans, playfully rolling his eyes. you assume he's done as much favors for guanheng as you have, and you barely stifle the snicker that dares to escape your lips.
dejun hears the sound, and smacks your arm hard, making you jump. he only gives you a teasing smile before turning to guanheng, having to give him a response.
"at what lengths do i have to go for this favor?"
guanheng scoffs, crossing his arms. "it's nothing insane or anything, i just want you to get me something.."
"and you can't get it yourself because..?"
"i have no money on me" and there goes that signature guanheng frown, dejun opens his mouth to argue but then he shuts it so quickly it seems like he just got out in some sort of trance.
"fine fine" dejun rolls his eyes once again, surrendering much too quickly. "you owe me though—"
"take y/n with you".
there's a pause, both you and dejun go very silent for a moment. whilst dejun is just confused, you absolutely know what guanheng is doing, and you have to use every bit of patience in your body to restrain yourself instead of jumping over the table and tackling him right then and there.
dejun is clearly clueless, though, because he just raises an eyebrow. "why?" he inquires, somehow sounding so sweet even though his question is asked with so much confusion.
"y/n knows what i want".
what a smooth lie, dejun glances over at you, and you just shrug, having no idea what more to say. "he needs to take a walk anyway" guanheng lies again, wow, two in a row! he's on a roll.
"okay..?"
so that's how you find yourself on a walk with the person that you are very much in love with, a somehow comfortable silence spread between the two of you as dejun hums an unfamiliar tune to himself, hands in his pockets, eyes closed as he slowly sways back and forth.
he looks very peaceful, just doing what he does, being effortlessly pretty as he does so, and you observe his behavior, almost entranced by it in a sense.
you only stop when he speaks up—
"do you think they're still arguing?" he suddenly asks, and you snap out of whatever daze you were having, praying that he totally didn't notice you admiring him like a creep. "or are they just.. conversing calmly now?"
you don't want to seem like even much more of a weirdo, but you feel like he asked that question just as an excuse to talk to you, and maybe your thinking too much into it, but you've definitely done that before, so you know what it looks like.
"i hope they aren't still arguing" you answer, and dejun looks up at you, smiling. "that'd be a long ass time to argue".
"well they like arguing just to argue" dejun replies, fiddling with his necklace. "but they're harmless.. for the most part".
his delivery makes you laugh, and you look down at your shoes. "you're a very calm person, you know, the opposite of guanheng".
the sudden statement from dejun makes you look up at him once again, and this time, he's staring directly at you, as if he had been waiting to make eye contact with you the whole time. "calm?"
"well compared to my roommates you are" he giggles, and maybe he doesn't mean to, but he stares at so intensely that your legs feel shaky.
"who knows? maybe i'm a fraud" you tease, purposefully leaning closer to him so your words have an effect. dejun's eyes widen, and he lightly leans away from you, looking speechless. "you'd never know, though".
you don't know how you suddenly got so bold, or why you were so amused at the sight of dejun freaking out, you feel like some sort of genius for what you just did, and you snicker at yourself before leaning back.
dejun takes in a deep breath, looking like he's trying to fix himself. he clears his throat and stumbles through his next words. "i— uh.. you're such an idiot!" he decides to say, crossing his arms over his chest.
your not sure how the two of you became so casual in this amount of time, a few weeks ago, dejun wasn't such a regular figure in your life, and you were just any other college student doing their best to get by, not thinking about falling in love with a gorgeous oreo–haired man—
but you're also not complaining.
you aren't sure how you got so lucky, how it just happened that you could continue to spend time with the cute boy you met at a stupid football game simply because the two of you shared mutual friends, it's one of times guanheng's actually done you a favor, without even realizing it too!
"okay i'm sorry" you giggle, shoving your hands into your pockets, you once again begin taking from dejun's habits and sway back and forth. "seriously!"
"you're unbelievable" dejun exaggerates, rolling his eyes, but it wasn't serious, and you knew it wasn't serious. "but i meant what i said, your calm".
you raise an eyebrow at him, wanting to know more about the observations he has about you. "could you elaborate on that?" you don't mean to laugh, but you do, and it causes dejun to laugh too.
"you just.. seem content with what you have" he explains, but he doesn't explain it enough, so he continues. "like someone could get you a piece of paper as a birthday gift and you'd be pleased".
you laugh, hard, because he somehow managed to get you spot on. you almost feel like he is reading your mind, because he nailed you down with each word. "really? i guess i am like that".
"ah, so my prediction was right then!"
you laugh at how glad he is. "yeah, i am truly not that hard to please, gifts are gifts and if someone gets one for me, there's no use in being mad if the gift isn't something i like, at least they remembered to get me something!"
dejun stares at you for a specifically long time, looking you up and down. he stares at you with warm eyes, a gaze that seems so near and dear to his heart, a gaze so loving that it looked like he was about to get down on one knee and propose to you.
"i like any and all gifts" you continue.
"are there any specific kinds of gifts you like?"
dejun asks that question in a tone that makes it seem like he's totally not trying to sound suspicious, but he is totally asking you that question for a very specific reason.
guanheng must've told him something..
at least, that's what you assume, but dejun is patiently waiting for your answer, and you can't daydream the whole time about the true meaning of his words.
"i like books, plushies, music tapes, vinyl's, you know.. regular gifts that people like receiving".
dejun hums, as if he's noting down the information you're telling him in his mind, still, you don't say anything about his mannerisms, just keep it to yourself.
"are you noting down my reply?"
"i'm just keeping it in mind!" he says, smiling brightly at you. "just in case your special occasion comes up and i don't know what to get you".
oh! so guanheng definitely did tell him something..
"i mean— were friends! any gift from you will be a good gift".
at the word friends, dejun seems to pause, cogs in his brains turning as he tries to process your words. you don't understand why he would be trying to understand your words, because the two of you were clearly friends, did he think you two were something else?
you see the flash of disappointment on his face, but it quickly reverts back to a smile and he simply acts like nothing happened. "sorry, the word 'friends' just caught me off guard".
a lie..
how interesting.
"seriously though, i just want to get you a gift you'll appreciate forever".
but you're already enough for me— do you know how much you've changed my life?
your own thoughts manage to surprise you, because the words that you just told yourself in your own mind startle you enough that you make a judging face at yourself. luckily, dejun is turned away from you, so he doesn't notice.
"well that's thoughtful of you".
"i try my best.." he responds, finally looking back at you with that same loving stare, one that wants to lure you in and make you trip on your own feet.
for some reason, the two of you stop. there's an uncharacteristically long pause, like the world just decided to cease for a moment, and you both are completely stuck in place, just there, staring at each other.
dejun's eyes move, as if scanning your face like a camera, and they (of course) stop at your lips. he stares at them for what seems like forever, and it almost looks like he's restraining himself, but by the way he bites his bottom lip, it's clear—
he wants to kiss you.
and maybe there's a small voice at the back of his head that tells him to cut it out, because he almost immediately snaps out of whatever daze he was having, and clears his throat, his cheeks going a bright red.
"uh— sorry, yeah, um, we should get going" he says, shaking his head as he pulls his sleeves down.
"guanheng will yell at us if we're late".
okay, so he just decides to not talk about it? you want to ask him why he didn't just do it, because he clearly wanted to, but before you can even open your mouth, or get any words out, he grabs your hand and the two of you continue walking back to the group.
he doesn't say anything more, doesn't try to make anymore small talk, and while you do want to bring up what just happened there, you don't.
you just bask in the feeling of dejun's hands intertwined with your own.
it's a good feeling, you decide.
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THAT MOMENT IS STUCK ON YOUR MIND for what seems like years. you can't get over it! how he was looking at you, how he clearly wanted to kiss you, but for some reason, decided to stop himself from doing so. you're not sure why you didn't just tell him that it was okay, that you would be completely fine with him kissing you, but you guess that you're just a complete idiot as well, because you just stayed silent throughout the whole thing, the two of you equally deciding in silence to not bring it up, just sitting next to each other in awkwardly for the rest of the night.
and yeah, it's become normal for dejun to constantly run through your mind these days, it's like he has his own subsection in your mind, dedicated to thoughts about him and him only, but it's like he's just become rampant in there ever since that.. thing he did (or should you say, didn't do, considering he decided to not kiss you when the opportunity was right there), maybe you should've pulled him in, maybe you should've (for once) been impulsive and done the first thing put to your mind.
and this crawls through your mind for days, then those days become a good week and a half. now— you and dejun aren't not talking or anything, it was just sort of difficult to look at him without thinking about that.
you're so into your thoughts these days, that you are much more spacey during your classes, at home, and somehow, guanheng picks up on your weird turn, which is crazy, because guanheng was the last person you expected to notice something like that, he usually never notices most things in front of him anyway.
"okay, what the fuck happened?" he decides to randomly drop it on you when he seems to have had enough, which is funny, because he's technically the person that started the whole thing.
you look up from your phone, blinking at him like he just said something out of this world. "hm?" he scoffs at your lack of a response, shoving your shoulder, which results in a glare from you.
"what happened?" he asks again, this time without the extra swear word, he makes himself comfortable on the other side of the couch. "you are acting weird" he points at you accusingly, like you'd just been accused of a crime and he was trying to figure out if you were truly suspicious.
"i don't know what your talking about.."
"stop stalling!" he complains, grabbing your arm and beginning to shake you back and forth. "tell me! you can't keep acting weird and just not tell me what's wrong".
now you want to tell him, but in your mind it sounds so stupid that you feel like guanheng would laugh at you the moment you uttered the first few words of your sentence. "you're going to laugh".
guanheng gasps, offended by your response, though it is true, he just wants to be dramatic. "i won't! i'm concerned! i'm being a good roommate and asking you what's wrong!"
so, you roll your eyes, taking a deep breath. "okay so hypothetically.." you begin, because you have no other idea how to start your sentence.
hypothetically just means = it was indeed not hypothetical!
"hypothetically, uh huh.." guanheng hums, understanding the true meaning your words have. "okay sorry, continue".
"let's just say that, hypothetically, i am totally in love with one of your best friends, and that friend totally wanted to kiss me but then chickened out last minute and like an idiot i didn't say anything and i have no idea how to go about it".
guanheng's eyes widen at your words, and his jaw almost drops. "hypothetically though" you add to the end of your sentence after a long pause.
"right right! hypothetically.." he nods, though he can't contain his look of excitement at the words. "and you didn't kiss him back!?"
you're almost knocked off the chair from how intense his yell is. you groan and cover your face with your hands, embarrassed and ashamed. "i didn't know how to bring it up and not be awkward!"
"just say 'hey dejun you could totally kiss me and it'd be fine because we are both mortifyingly in love with each other'!" guanheng shouts, louder than his previous words. he's always so straight up, and you almost wish you didn't tell him anything. "it's that easy!"
"it is not!" you shout in rebuttal, crossing your arms and frowning. your acting like guanheng at this point, but that's not what you're noticing at this very moment. "it's easy for you! you date people and you kiss people all the time! i don't do that!"
"excuses excuses!"
you're at a loss for words at his lackluster words, you once again, frown and turn away from him. "i'm sorry! i have never been hardcore in love with someone like this before! i don't know how to talk about it!"
guanheng looks like he's about to yell again, but he takes a deep breath and relaxes himself, leaning back in the couch. "okay, i'm sorry for yelling.."
"y/n, you really just need to tell him how you feel straight up, because if you keep stalling than none of you will end up confessing in the end and you'll both just be going through a loop of 'should we or should we not?'"
you blink, staring at guanheng for a good few minutes, honestly surprised. this is probably the best advice he's ever given you, usually, you’re the one that has to give him advice because he always ends up doing something stupid and has someone that wants to murder him because of that stupid thing he did.
"that was actually.. good advice" you reply, laughing at guanheng's eye roll. he just shoves you, making sure he does extra hard this time to get his point across.
"shut up! i always give good advice!"
"you usually don't give any advice at all.." you mutter, running a hand through your hair as you look away from your roommate, who just glares at you like you just committed a federal offense.
"say something again and i'm gatekeeping dejun from you!"
"your what!?"
at the sound of your shout, guanheng giggles as he scurries away, proud of himself for the words that escape his lips.
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YOU'RE NOT SURE HOW YOU SOMEHOW LET guanheng drag you off to a party on a friday night where all you wanted to do is relax. parties have never truly been your thing, but that's because being surrounded by a bunch of drunk and high adults just isn't your idea of fun, you're also just not a big drinker, so the only reason you usually even end up at parties is to take guanheng home when he gets too drunk and can't fully articulate his thoughts. so, the fact that guanheng was somehow able to convince you to get out of the house and go to a party when you truly should've been at home, watching horrible sitcoms.
but no, you're here! and you can't leave without guanheng because if you did, he'd probably find a way to end up killing himself, or he'd say the wrong thing to the wrong person and would end up getting punched in the face.
so you find yourself in a familiar spot, your back against a wall as you stare at your phone, somehow able to ignore the hundreds of screaming drunk people that surround you, it's become a skill of yours, and you're not sure how exactly it developed, you've just become such a natural when it comes to ignoring others.
guanheng, of course, has already walked off to do his own thing, but not before reminding you of the advice he'd given you a few days prior, yelling at you to 'just tell the boy you like him!'
maybe his advice is burned into your brain, because now all you wish is that you were with dejun, talking about something stupid, or just talking.
and there must've been somebody listening in on your thoughts, because he suddenly walks around the corner, head whipping around like he's searching for someone.
your not trying to look at him, but he catches your gaze immediately, and he skips towards you like a kid in a candy store.
"hi" he greets, a little giggle to his words. his face is a shade of bright red as he giggles once again, though nothing's funny. "pretty".
he whispers the last word, with the intention of you not hearing it, but his mind must be too clouded for him to realize that he said it much louder than he thought he did, but you don't say anything, just hum.
"hello" you greet back, and he laughs once again, covering his hand with his mouth. "are you okay?"
a loud snicker leaves his lips, and he moves closer to you to link his arm with yours. he rests his head onto your arm, a content smile spreading across his face. "i'm drunk".
his honest answer makes you question his state for a moment, since when do drunk people admit that they're drunk? or maybe he's only just tipsy.. your not sure, but he's not acting like a totally sober person right now.
"are you sure?" you raise an eyebrow, dejun just responds with a small 'hmph', and he keeps your arm linked with his. "dejun".
"yes! i am!" he yells as rebuttal, shaking your arm a few times. "do you wanna smell my breath?"
"oh no no no" you reply, covering his mouth with your hand. he laughs at you, his cheeks as pink as yangyang's hair, he grabs your hands, and whilst yours are cold, his are burning hot. "okay you have energy".
"i'm sorry" he suddenly blurts, another snort escaping his lips as he leans his head against your chest. you give him a look, confused as to why he felt the need to apologize.
"for what?"
"for doing that thing" dejun responds, closing his eyes as he sways back and forth. "i probably made everything awkward, i didn't mean to".
that's what he thinks? he thinks that he made everything awkward? you feel your heart break at the realization, but all dejun does is laugh sadly.
"you didn't— you didn't make everything awkward, it's okay".
dejun laughs again, clearing his throat. "just tell the truth, y/n.."
you chuckle, not at dejun, just at his words. he wants you to tell the truth? fine.. you will!
"dejun" you begin, using your pointer finger to tilt his chin up so the two of you make eye contact, you watch as his eyes widen, but he doesn't move, just lets you do your thing. "you can kiss me, it's okay".
he blinks, as if trying to figure out if you were lying or not. he opens his mouth, but no words come out, so he closes it again. "it is?" he asks again, just wanting reassurance, you hear his voice crack, but he's getting impatient, he wants your answer.
"yeah it's fine".
that's all the conformation dejun seems to need, because he finally presses his lips to yours after what seems like years of waiting. your arms naturally rest on his waist, and there's just something, something about this that makes you smile.
there's an urgency in the way he kisses you, and his hand comes up to hold your face. he is just so desperate, and it would be a lie to say that you weren't just as desperate as he is. you'd been wanting this for so long, you don't even know how many times you thought about what it would be like to kiss dejun.
his fingers caress your cheek, and the contact feels like your skin was set ablaze. maybe this is what you needed, and you assume it's exactly what dejun needed to, because he pushes on your shoulder with a seemingly inhumane amount of force, which makes you gasp a little.
while your one arm is around his waist, the other one goes up to run your fingers through his hair, somehow causing the two of you to both smile, barely stifling your laughs.
after what seems like forever, dejun pulls away, and while you're standing there, breathless, he just smiles, relaxing as you play with his hair. "you like my hair?"
you aren't sure why out of all things, that's what he decides to ask, but you laugh, completely enamored by the boy in front of you. "yep, it's soft" you reply, biting your inner cheek. "the color suits you".
dejun tilts his head, looking up at you with his insanely pretty eyes. you just want to squish his cheeks, or wrap him in a blanket and hold him forever, you aren't sure why you just have this surge of loving emotions for absolutely no reason, maybe it's the way he's staring at you, or that he just left you breathless and did it so flawlessly.
he hums, not knowing how to respond to your compliment. he just suddenly gets shy, his ears turning red at your words.
"you're so stupid.."
that's probably his favorite phrase to say to you by now, but you don't mind, you just smile as he hides his face away from you. 
"dejun" you call out despite him being right in front of you, and he looks up at you again, gaze warm as he gives you a small smile.
"yes?"
"i love you" you immediately spout, not even surprised by how high your voice has gotten. "like— in the i'm in love with you kinda way and not in a i just want you to kiss you but not call you my boyfriend kinda way".
dejun pauses, snickering at your words, he looks at you like you're the only person in the world.
what other way could there possibly be?
but you don't get any response, at least, not from him, because all he does is lean forward and press his lips to yours.
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YOU'VE NEVER REALLY BEEN A FAN OF YOUR BIRTHDAY, and you aren't sure why. it used to be a fun thing up until you turned twelve and it suddenly felt like a switch had flipped, as if your birthday was making you miserable. now it's not like you always feel depressed on your birthday, it's just that sometimes you don't want to have a huge birthday celebration. most of the time— you only request for huge birthday bashes on specific days, like when you turned ten (you were very excited about becoming a double–figured age), or when you turned eighteen (you became an adult, not that exciting but it was definitely something, you could finally legally drink), but it's truly only specific days that you don't mind having large, people–filled birthday parties.
and not only were you not exactly anticipating your birthday, you already had something even bigger on your mind the whole time.
like dejun ghosting you! that's definitely one!
okay so you tell the guy you love him, you make out with him at a party (in the opposite order but oh well), he doesn't give you a response and then he decides to just ignore you?
maybe he just didn't know what to say, and that also lead to him just not picking up his phone for a good two weeks as he completely ignored your calls and texts and voicemails!
and with this being the only thing on your mind, your birthday seemed to be the least important event at the moment.
you didn't really want to think about it, and the campus was starting to make you feel sick, so this year you planned on visiting your parents after the day was over, considering your special day fell on a friday—
but guanheng, guanheng had other plans.
he practically begged you to let him throw the party for you, he wanted to do it so bad that he vowed to never ask you for a favor ever again (which is a lie! he never keeps his promises!), he was acting so desperate, it was like you'd just saved his life or something.
you're not sure what made guanheng so eager to throw a party for you, especially because you just didn't know what you would do with a bunch of people in your dorm.
but he insisted, he would throw you the best party in the world.
and after what seemed like forever, you two finally agreed on something—
you go visit your parents friday evening, and guanheng throws your party on saturday, easy!
"what do you mean strawberry isn't a good flavor!?"
you scoff at his question, nodding your head, as if confirming your words. "i don't like strawberry flavored things, you get me a strawberry cake and i'm making you sleep outside".
your threat results in a gasp from your roommate, who looks genuinely hurt by your words as he places a hand on his chest, horrified. "you are such a horrible roommate! threatening me when i'm throwing a party for you".
"it'll be a horrible party if you get me a horribly flavored cake".
you totally mean what you say as well— you truly dislike strawberry cake.
and when guanheng said party, you didn't exactly anticipate how many people he would decide to let into your dorm.
now you know a good chunk of these people, but most of these people probably decided to come just because they knew guanheng, all they did was utter some happy birthday's and then they ran off to do their own thing.
guanheng got most things right, he just invited a bunch of people that really didn't care for your birthday, just wanted to be around him.
so it's no surprise that you felt just a little disappointed about the people at your party that just didn't give two shits about your actual birthday.
and guanheng was off doing something else, though you could actually see him this time, he was telling people where to put the gifts they brought for you.
your beginning to feel suffocated in your own dorm, which is ironic to you, because this is quite literally the place you go to get away from a bunch of people, it's the only place of yours that isn't full of people.
so, you clear your throat, and push through people to get to the door, not wanting to stay inside with all these people, you'll probably end up throwing up everywhere if you stay inside even longer.
when you exit the dorm, you take a deep breath the moment you close the door, letting your back fall against it. you immediately jump as you see a person behind the door—
okay so dejun (who you confessed your love to by the way!), is pacing back and forth in front of your door, totally stressing. you blink, a look of confusion spreading across your face. "um.."
"are you okay?"
you aren't even sure why you opened your mouth, but if you didn't, this would just go on for a good twenty more minutes.
dejun jumps, clearing his throat as he smiles awkwardly. "you— scared the shit out of me".
he's acting so casually? after not talking to you for a good two weeks!?
"sorry—"
"i'm sorry!"
dejun immediately yells, covering his face with his hands. "i'm so sorry for not texting you! or calling you! or giving you a response! it was so stupid of me to not consider your feelings and instead of just telling you straight up how i felt i decided to ignore you but i was scared that i wouldn't be able to tell you without making it awkward and it—"
"dejun" you place your hands on his shoulders, turning him around to face you. "your rambling".
he sighs, eyes darting away from your face, he frowns. "but it's not okay, i didn't talk to you, i probably came off as such an asshole! you were probably so confused, and i just.. said nothing!"
you observe his features, and he looks even more anxious at your silence. his face goes red, and his leg begins bouncing up and down, whilst his hands look for something to hold.
"okay, calm down.." you mutter, reaching for his left hand and lacing it together with yours. "it's okay, there's no need to be worried".
"i'm sorry" he says again, finally looking up at you. "i get it if you don't forgive me—"
"dejun" you cut into his sentence, squeezing his left hand. "i forgive you.. i love you".
you repeat your confession once more, and dejun blinks, processing your words.
"i love you too".
and finally, after what seems like forever, after what was so long, he gave you a response.
before you could say anything more, dejun pulls you in for a hug, his arms circling around your waist. you're a bit taken aback by the sudden display of affection, but you also don't mind, because he squeezes you tighter.
"happy birthday" he mumbles, a small smile coming to his face as he feels your hand comb through his hair. "i'm sorry".
"stop apologizing" you say, lifting his chin up so you could look him in the eyes. "i forgive you, it's okay".
and it is, you're being completely honest, but dejun doesn't say more, immediately pulling you back into a warm hug
but suddenly, the door to your dorm swings open and guanheng peaks his head out, eyes widening as he witnesses the current thing. he has absolutely no context to anything which was happening at the moment, he just opened the door to witness a totally unaware dejun hugging you.
"uh.." he blinks, glancing between you two, but not asking anything, just clearing his throat. "it's time to cut the cake?" he laughs awkwardly, and you just smile, giving him a i'll be right there look.
"o...kay" he doesn't say anything more, just goes back inside and closes the door.
dejun giggles as guanheng closes the door, pulling away again to look up at you. "oh he is totally tired of us".
"we didn't do anything, though".
dejun snickers, lightly hitting your arm. "okay okay, you need to stop, it's your birthday, you have to go cut your cake".
"and.." he pauses, pulling a box out of nowhere and handing it over to you. "open your gifts".
you raise an eyebrow, confused. "where were you even hiding that?"
"that's irrelevant! it's your birthday, come on!"
and you let him drag you back into your dorm, smiling at him the whole time.
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YOU ALMOST CONSIDER THE WAY YOU are acting to be absurd, and it's funny how much of another side dejun can just bring out of you. now you would never consider yourself to be a grumpy person, but people usually do describe you as having a 'natural frown'. you never really thought of yourself as being like that, but you guess that people don't see you look so happy much, because they continue to point out how it's like some glitch in the matrix to see you just a little less miserable as each day passes. chenle especially makes comments, talking about how you need to "put your smile away" because not seeing your resting face constantly freaks him out, renjun on the other hand, is elated, or maybe he's just glad he can finally be rid of you, you don't know.
but all that put aside, you are happy, and you have a cute oreo–haired man to thank for that.
and maybe this is all you really need, just dejun, the two of you don't even have to do anything, he can just lay his head down onto your shoulder and you'd be having a good time.
you like it when he sits down and paints your nails for you, or when he watches you bake over your shoulder, not knowing what to do but happy to watch you do your thing, or when he coerces you to win prizes from carnival games for him with his absolutely adorable eyes (he doesn't even need to try to coerce you, you'd do it either way).
"i'm pretty sure this is illegal".
"it's not!" you reply, though you mean to reassure dejun, your words seem to worry him more than anything. you take his hand, squeezing it. "dejun, i'm not getting you into any illegal activity".
"i can never tell with you" he retorts suspiciously, keeping your hand in his as you lead him up, he would have tripped if not for you holding your hand and guiding you up.
you clear your throat, patting the spot beside you as dejun immediately sits, so close to you that your legs are touching. "if i ever wanted to do something illegal, i'd know better than to bring you along".
he gasps, and you can't resist the urge to laugh at how offended he sounds. "what is that supposed to mean!?"
"you" your pointer finger touches his nose, and he doesn't even try to move. "are a snitch, you would be horrible to commit a crime with".
dejun slaps your hand away, and you laugh at the way he crosses his arms, a familiar pout gracing his absolutely beautiful features. "you— i.. take that back!"
"it's true! even yangyang would be a better option than you!"
dejun is even more offended by the words, and he slowly scoots away from you, arms still crossed as he pouts. you giggle as he remains scooted away from you, still angry about the words you said.
"uh— jun, i was just joking!"
"you suck".
dejun glares, but his glare is anything but serious, as you can see the way he slowly starts to break under your gaze, resisting the urge to burst into laughter. "i hate you".
"you love me".
he does, and he can't pretend he doesn't, because he almost immediately snickers, looking away from you as to not laugh more.
oh he is just so adorable.
you scoot closer to him and wrap your arms around his waist, making him yelp. "you're so cute" you mutter into his shoulder, and at this point, dejun doesn't even try to pretend anymore.
"you're so corny" he says, patting your arms that currently circle around his waist. you lean your head down onto his shoulder, making yourself comfortable, and he just lets you, because at this point he can't really push you off him.
"don't fall asleep, i'm not going to carry you back to your place".
"you would be too weak to carry me anyway— ow!"
you yell loudly as dejun nudges you in the stomach with his elbow, and while he looks absolutely proud of himself, you just glare, absolutely done with him.
but you don't say anything, just lets your fingers run through his hair, probably your favorite thing to do with him. he just cups your face, and he just smiles at your face, giggling. "your just as cute as when we first met".
the statement makes you snicker, because you did not expect for him to say that out of all things he could've said. you get why he says it though, because you are at the place where it all began, the bleachers, the same bleachers where you two were standing when you shared your first interaction.
you tilt your head, wanting to tease him more. "so there were moments where i wasn't cute, then?"
dejun scoffs, turning away from you. he lightly pinches your arm, and you yelp once again, inching away from him. "why do you enjoy hurting me?"
he smiles innocently. "i don't, i have absolutely no idea what you're talking about!"
your face drops, and all dejun does is laugh, squeezing your cheeks. "don't be mad, babe, you know i love you".
and you do, you do know, he never fails to remind you of how much he does.
"i love you too.."
with your eye rolls, and tiny mutters, dejun knows, he knows that you're telling the truth.
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phagodyke · 1 year ago
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cried in the shower and meds are kicking in now so im all okay again or close enough <3
waking up and remembering I have to live the rest of my life today and tomorrow and so on ☹️
#its okay having a secondrate life bc its mine. and theres no rush i can take things at a slower pace than everyone else#and if i have more intense ups and downs well thats just part of being me. fulfillment isnt gonna come in the same way it does for others#just brushed a little too close to triggers yesterday and I think it didnt help being out so late bc my meds wear off#so i was crashing while also trying to handle a sensitive cluster of emotional nerves which. yeah was a really bad idea#but nothing new im still just recovering from my fucking rsd episodes in may it undid a year n a half of emotional work in a week#idk how long itll take before i feel like i have a solid foothold again.. it wasnt like i was perfectly secure before then anyway#so frustrating but just gotta live around it for now while it continues to heal. and not stick my grubby fingers in the open wound#also took my meds like 2 hours later than normal today bc i forgor and i dont think my body appreciated that 🫣#man if this temporary private healthcare situation ends up not being temporary and i have to quit taking meds entirely. uh#well the withdrawal is not going to be fun. im gonna have to ask friends to keep a very close watch on me if that happens#at least i have a pretty decent supply atm so hopefully ill know in enough time to be able to gradually wean myself off#like i can take half doses n stuff for a while. and hopefully thatll stop me killing myself lmao#but yeah. still a bit sad but its not a new ache so lets not worry abt it. much milder and more tolerable like this anyway#im gonna go out n vote before i forget to. and then play some elden ring when im back maybe#and then when my friends up we can go for brunch somewhere :-) and then i have the whooole afternoon 2 chill#and then climbing yippeeee and then work tomorrow booooo but at least just a day til the weekend#okay! lets go#.diaries
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goosefruit · 2 years ago
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underneath the christmas tree
vanessa shelly x fem!reader
cw: smut, sub!reader, praise kink, vanessa eats it from the back, fingering, sex toy/vibrator use
a/n: im sorry if this is ass ive had terrible writer's block for like the past two weeks help
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Pressing down on the last piece of tape, you let out a little ‘aha!’ as you adjusted the material around your body. You took a long look in the mirror, admiring the result of your work.
Nothing except two pieces of wrapping paper covered your top and bottom halves, patterns of snowflakes on a red background. Of course, you made sure to cut away enough paper to show off your cleavage. A dainty pink bow was glued on the makeshift ‘bra’ to top it all off. 
Everything was held together messily by cheap tape, but that didn’t really matter; the outfit was made to be torn apart anyways. 
You looked like a real present. 
For the past forty-five minutes, you had been working on this bizarre scheme that you had thought to be so hilarious. Vanessa was taking one of her hour-long showers, giving you a perfect period of time to take advantage of. 
You heard the shower turn off and quickly rushed to take your place beneath the Christmas tree. 
Though there were still a couple of days to go until Christmas Day, presents were already stacked in neat piles around the base of the tree. At least a quarter of them were from Vanessa to you, who loved to spoil you with her cop money. 
Vanessa stepped out of the washroom in her bathrobe, damp hair draped across her shoulders.
“Woah! Did Santa come early this year?” A playful grin took over her face as she caught sight of you on your knees under the tree. 
“This exactly what you wished for?” You asked her sweetly, feigning innocence despite being half-naked. 
“Mhm,” she leaned down to kiss you. Fresh out of the shower, you could smell a combination of her shampoo, body wash, and lotion. You moaned softly against her lips and pulled her down so that she was on the ground with you. 
Her hands began to wander on your body, nails lightly scratching your bare back. With that, you felt her tongue enter your mouth, and you knew that she was getting impatient for more. 
“Unwrap me,” your voice was barely a whisper. 
In one effortless motion, Vanessa ripped your top in half, letting it fall to the floor. She did not waste a second before cupping your breasts in her hands, squeezing and massaging them. You sucked on the tip of her tongue to let her know how much you were enjoying it. 
Without breaking the kiss, she scooped you up in her arms and carried you to the rug in front of the fireplace. Here, you didn’t have to worry about knocking anything over. 
Her mouth eventually found itself on your breast, licking a stripe up your cleavage. Squeals and whines spewed out of you as she sucked hickeys into your soft skin. 
“So pretty, my love,” Her breath tickled against your collarbone. “Such perfect tits, and you wrapped them up so well for me.”
Fuck, her praises made you so wet. 
“You sound so adorable too. All I want to do is make you whine and moan all day, touching those beautiful tits however you want me to. Think you can be louder for me?”
You nodded swiftly, meeting her lustful eyes.
“Good girl.”
An embarrassingly loud moan slipped out between your lips. 
“Now, let’s see what else we got here.” She slipped her fingers under the remaining wrapping paper and pulled it off your hips, crumpling it into a ball and throwing it god knows where.
Your pussy practically gleamed in the light, folds slick with arousal. You couldn’t help but thrust your hips up in a desperate need for any kind of friction. 
Vanessa gasped with mock-astonishment. “How did you know that this was at the top of my wishlist?” 
You gave her a light slap on the arm for her sarcasm. 
Now, you were in a position where you laid on your back with her on top of you. Her fingers brushed over the top of your pussy. Your sore, needy pussy. 
“I can’t believe this pretty cunt is all mine. Did me playing with your tits get you this wet?” Her hands wrapped around the back of your calves and placed your legs over her shoulders. You shivered as her damp hair stuck to your sensitive inner thighs. 
“Vanessa, touch me please,” you needed to feel her tongue before you passed out from arousal.
“Oh look sweetie, your pussy’s getting wetter, all for me! It’s practically gushing out of you, my needy girl,” she pressed kisses down your thighs, neglecting the part where you needed her most. “I wanna get a taste of that sweet nectar.”
“Just p-please, I need you. Please, please, please, Vanessa.” 
“However, I do have a better idea. On all fours for me, sweetheart.”
You groaned at your pleasure being delayed for even a second longer, but obliged as you had no other choice. Vanessa went behind you, firmly gripping both of your thighs. “What a perfect view,” she sighed lovingly. Before you had time to process, she buried her face in your soaked heat, nails digging into your skin. She pulled you closer to her by the legs, and you yelped as you felt her tongue on your clit after that agonizing wait. 
“Y-yes baby! Fuck— just like that.” You screamed at the top of your lungs. If losing your voice was what it took for her to keep going, you were gladly ready to make the sacrifice.
Vanessa slipped two fingers inside of you, then adding a third when she decided that you were turned on enough to easily take all three. She curled them rhythmically, alternating with strokes of her tongue against your throbbing clit. It was almost embarrassing how fast your orgasm was building up, but every move your girlfriend made brought you closer to the inevitable.
“Just like that, feels so good. God it feels so good, don’t stop, please don’t stop.” You wailed, squeezing your eyes shut. You prayed with all your might that Vanessa was feeling generous enough to let you cum straight away tonight. 
“What a good girl. You taste amazing, I can’t get enough.” She grabbed at your ass, leaving a red imprint. “Cum when you’re ready, m’kay my dear? ‘M not going to be mean tonight, you’ve been such a good girl.”
The “thank you” that you meant to say was lost amongst a long string of moans and profanities as you finally reached your climax. Thrusting your core onto her tongue, arousal gushed out into her mouth and all over her fingers. You didn’t know how long it was until your legs stopped shaking.
“You did such a good job. I’m so proud of you,” Vanessa scooped you up in her arms and held you against her chest, which was rising up and down quickly as she, too, tried to catch her breath.
After a brief moment, she set you down to grab something from the tree.
“Since I got to open an early present today, I thought it would only be fair for you to open one of your own too.” 
She handed you a box, wrapped with blue paper and white ribbon. 
You almost choked when you saw what was inside.
A light pink G-spot vibrator——it seemed rather expensive too, with various different settings built in. 
Vanessa helped you take it out of its packaging, knowing your hands were still shaky from your orgasm. As you examined the toy, she untied her robe and threw it aside, leaving you with a breathtaking view of her naked body. 
“Allow me to give you a demo.”
Taking the toy, she pressed herself against you irresistibly. Her nipples were hard and erect, toned abs flexing as she rolled her hips onto you. The stickiness on her lips tasted of your pleasure.
She lined the silicone up with your entrance, pushing half of it in before turning on the vibrations. You moaned as it found your sweet spot, throwing your head back in ecstasy. 
“Feels good, hmm?” Vanessa hummed, slowly rocking the toy up and down inside of you. “Got some pretty friggin’ great reviews online. Maybe you could leave your own after.” 
Her ability to talk so casually while fucking you never failed to turn you on. Your stomach flipped nonstop, a knot tightening in your core. 
She turned the vibrator up a setting and positioned the handle along her slit.
The noises she let out as she ground her clit against the silicone were sinful, moans and whimpers laced with pure lust. She kept a hand on the toy, now drawing small circles on your g-spot. 
“You gonna cum, baby? Is my princess gonna cum?” Her breathing was harsh and ragged as she began to seek her own high. 
“Ye— turn it up another s-setting, please!” 
She did what you asked, and was rewarded by a huge spurt of squirt splattering all over her thighs. You cried out her name hoarsely as you came, limbs spasming like crazy. 
“You’re so fucking hot, good fucking girl. Squirting all over me like that, gonna make me cum, holy shit.” 
Another roll of her hips, and Vanessa finished with a silent scream. 
It was a rare sight, seeing her lose control like that—back arching, eyebrows knitted, eyes rolling back, and mouth wide open. You loved it.
When she was stable enough to stand, she got up to retrieve her bathrobe and covered the two of you with it. The fireplace softly crackled in the background, radiating heat. 
You laid with your eyes closed as she spooned you from behind, feeling so warm, so loved, and so very grateful.
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