#anyways again a thing from a bit ago... we're still catching up

[mepomepo]

Little test for a project,,,,the aim was trying to mimick a very crunchy ds sprite lol

Non animated version w/o effects below

Kinda fun to try a new style

[woso-dreamzzz]

Injured (Jenni's Version): Christmas

Jenni Hermoso x Child!Reader

Summary: Christmas with Bambi and Jenni

"Mama?" You ask as Jenni checks her reflection in the car mirror.

It's dark outside and it looks like it's cold outside of the nice, warm car. It's not snowing or anything but it'll still be cold, you can tell.

"Yeah, bambi?" Jenni fluffs her hair briefly before smoothing it down again when it doesn't have the desired effect, folding back the sleeves of her shirt.

"What if they don't like me?"

You can't look at her in the rear view mirror, choosing to look down at your feet.

Jenni bought you a pair of shoes that look exactly like your favourite ballet flats but could be worn outside so you're wearing them now. They're a nice, pretty pink colour and shiny too.

You flex your feet inside the shoes just to see them move.

"What if who doesn't like you?"

Jenni tries to catch your eyes but you refuse to look at her.

"Your Mami and Papa. What if they don't like me?"

Jenni twists around in the driving seat to look at you properly.

You're wearing your new shoes and a very cute reindeer pyjama set and an even cuter train conductor hat that Jenni had bought on a whim after seeing it in the window of a charity shop as she passed by.

Andy sits in the seat next to you, little tail wagging as he stands next to you in a matching outfit to protect him from the cold.

"Why wouldn't they like you?"

You shrug, still looking down at your feet. "'Cause I don't look like you. The kids at school say I can't be your daughter if I don't look like you."

Jenni undoes her seatbelt and climbs over the centre console into the back with you.

Andy seems overjoyed, trying to escape his own seatbelt to lather her in kisses but Jenni's only focus is on you.

"Those kids at school are stupid."

"Mama, you say to never call people stupid."

"Huh...I guess I do but I can't help it if people are stupid and kids like that are. Alright? It doesn't matter if we don't look like each other. Do you know why, bambi?"

"Why?"

"Because we chose each other." Jenni gently unclips you from your car seat and pulls you into her lap. "And I think that means more than anyone will understand."

You rest your head on her shoulder, reaching out to gently play with her fingers as you think through her words. "Really?"

"Really. The kids at school are silly for thinking that just because we don't look alike means we're not family."

"Like how Andy's family too? Even though he's a dog and we're not?"

"Exactly like Andy. He's still part of the family and we still love him the same."

You nod. It's only a little nod, barely a movement of the head but Jenni feels it against her shoulder. "And your Mami and Papa will understand that I'm like Andy? And I'm still yours even though I wasn't always?"

"My Mami and Papa have been looking forward to meeting you for so long," Jenni replies. Her fingers gently stroke up and down your back, touches featherlight as she draws you close to her body like she wants to enshrine you under her skin - kept close and safe forever next to her.

"Are you sure?"

"It's all they've been talking about for weeks," Jenni assures you," They're so excited for you to open the presents they got you."

"They...They got me presents?"

That shouldn't have really been surprising for you. It's Christmas. People get other people presents for Christmas. But, still, you find yourself a bit confused.

Jenni was Mama, that was certain. That was definite. She did all the things that Mamas were meant to do like feed you and give you cuddles and kisses and take you to ballet and even let you sleep in bed with her when you woke up from a nightmare.

Jenni was Mama but that didn't make her parents automatically your Abuela and Abuelo. Jenni chose you. Jenni looked at you and decided that she would be your Mama. You chose her too.

But her parents haven't chosen you. Not yet anyway.

You've met them before, a long while ago when you were still Alexia's. It had only been in passing though and you don't really remember them now.

You wonder if they're actually excited to see you or if that's what they told Jenni.

You wonder if the presents they got you are actually something you'll like or something they think you should like.

The little knot in your stomach returns, like a tiger pacing its cage and you lean more heavily into Jenni.

"Tell you what," She says softly," We'll go inside, we'll open our presents and if you're still filling a little icky, we'll grab some dessert for the trip home and get out of there."

"Really, Mama?"

"Of course." Jenni presses a kiss to your crown. "It doesn't matter where we are so long as we celebrate Christmas together."

[appocalipse]

see for yourself ⋆ sirius black

summary: after a party, you tell sirius how you ended things with the guy you've been seeing because he was a bit jealous of your friendship with him. sirius shows you that maybe he was right to be.

"You're in a good mood."

Sirius looks at you from his place on the floor and grins, wild and boyish. It makes your stomach do flips that you'd rather not think about too much, lest it leads to things you really shouldn't be thinking about.

"Must be your charming company," he says before looking back up at the ceiling, fingers laced behind his head.

He's laying spreadeagle on the hardwood floor, staring up at the slowly rotating fan and taking occasional swigs from an open bottle of Firewhisky beside him. Everyone but Remus, with whom Sirius shares the flat, had already gone home hours ago, leaving only you and Sirius behind in the living room.

You roll your eyes even though he can't see you doing it, setting your empty cup on the coffee table. You lean back against the sofa and fold one leg up under the other so you can turn to face him fully. "Remind me again why you're not sitting on furniture like a normal person?"

"It's more fun down here." He turns his head enough for you to catch his wolfish grin. "Care to join me?"

"Oh no," you laugh, shaking your head. "I should be getting home anyway. It's late."

Sirius frowns and pushes himself up into a sitting position. The look in his gray eyes is equal parts amusement and disappointment. "On a Friday night? Come on, love, we're barely tipsy. Besides, you still haven't told me what happened between you and that wanker you were seeing."

"There's nothing to tell," you shrug.

He scoffs as he crawls across the floor towards you. You bite the inside of your cheek when Sirius hoists himself onto the sofa beside you and pulls one leg up to his chest. There's a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth that doesn't seem quite as innocent as you'd like it to be.

"He looked pretty pissed off when he left," he says, twirling a long strand of your hair around his index finger. "What'd you say to him?"

"I didn't say anything. And we were together for barely three weeks. I was just...he wasn't the right guy, okay? Now shush."

You make a halfhearted attempt to turn away from him, but Sirius laughs softly and rests his head on your shoulder. "You don't say."

"Sirius."

"What? I'm glad you didn't waste any more time on that tosser. He would never have made you happy."

"How would you know?"

Sirius lifts his head and leans back far enough to look at you. His expression is one of smug self-confidence as he says, "Because I know everything."

"Everything, huh?"

"Everything."

You quirk an eyebrow. "Well then, what am I thinking right now?"

His eyes flick down to your lips for a brief moment before they find yours again, but it's enough for heat to rise in your cheeks. You could swear he starts to move closer before he blinks and turns away with a dry laugh, but by then you're not so sure anymore. "That you're bored of talking about this dolt."

The ache of disappointment in your chest must be almost palpable, because Sirius furrows his brow and asks, "Is everything alright?"

"Yup."

"You're lying."

"No, I'm not."

Sirius gives you a knowing look and shifts on the sofa to face you more fully. His knee knocks against yours. "Don't tell me you're hung up over that berk."

"Not in the slightest."

"Liar."

"I'm not," you insist. "Really."

"Did he break your heart or something? I'll break his arm."

You laugh, though you doubt Sirius is actually joking. "Nothing happened. He was just jealous. That's all."

He frowns, then narrows his eyes at you. "Jealous of who?"

"Oh, you know, the usual suspects," you say lightly, waving a hand as if to dismiss the topic completely. But when Sirius remains silent, you let out a slow breath and (as you usually do when it comes to him) give in. "You, mostly. He said some stuff, and I didn't take too kindly to it."

A wry smile spreads across Sirius' face. He looks delighted. "What'd he say about me?"

"Seriously?"

"Absolutely."

With a dramatic roll of your eyes, you rest your head back against the cushion behind you and say, "He thinks you, uh...you know, fancy me or something. That we spend too much time together. But I told him that he's crazy, obviously."

"Obviously."

The following silence bothers you.

You turn your head enough to see Sirius' face. He's staring back at you, an unreadable expression on his face. Then, after several moments of more tense silence, he whispers, "What if I do fancy you?"

"Sure you do," you mutter, rolling your eyes again.

Sirius places his palm on top of the hand resting between the two of you and brushes his thumb over your knuckles. "I could show you."

It takes a moment for you to register the offer.

"Did you drink more than I realized?"

"Just enough for the liquid courage to work."

Your tongue feels like sandpaper. "Sirius."

"Mmhm."

"Stop being ridiculous."

"Who says I'm being ridiculous?" he asks, bringing your hand to his lips and pressing a light kiss to your skin. "Maybe I'm madly in love with you. Have you considered that?"

You swallow, trying to ignore the way your stomach is doing somersaults. "This isn't funny, Padfoot."

"It's not supposed to be funny."

"But—"

He cuts you off by cupping your cheek and leaning in close enough for you to feel his warm breath on your lips. It smells of Firewhisky and mint. "Kiss me and see for yourself."

"You must be drunk."

"Only tipsy," he reminds you. "Or maybe a little drunk on you."

"You know, you're not half as funny as—mmph!"

He's kissing you. Sirius is kissing you, and dear sweet Merlin, you could swear that the world's tilting beneath you as his hands pull you closer. He hums contentedly when he feels you reciprocating, cradling your face between his palms as if to make sure that you won't go anywhere.

Not that you intend to.

It's the kind of kiss that steals your breath away. The kind of kiss you can lose yourself in without even realizing it, especially when one of his hands slides into your hair, and you moan involuntarily into his mouth.

Sirius laughs breathlessly against your lips as he eases you down onto your back. His fingers dance along your jawline before he curls them under your chin, tilting your head back and kissing his way down your throat.

"I think this went better than expected," he murmurs, pausing long enough to gently bite down on the sensitive spot where your neck meets your shoulder. You gasp.

Sirius sits up suddenly. His hair hangs in front of his face like a dark curtain and his eyes glitter with amusement when he pushes it back. Your pulse jumps when you see the slight redness of his lips and the hint of mischief on his face. "Don't tell me you're getting shy now."

"Shut up."

He leans down and kisses you again, groaning low in his throat as your hands slide up the broad expanse of his back. "I'm starting to think you fancy me, too," he whispers, words ghosting over your mouth.

"Yeah," you admit sheepishly, sliding your hands up and over his shoulders. "I may have been lying earlier. It's not that crazy."

"May have?"

"Fine, I did lie."

"I knew it."

He looks far too smug. Just this once, you don't really mind.

[hminnj]

Unckuna/reader (he's very dear to my heart), mostly uncle nephew banter tbh, i needa get dividers lowkey, very short lil drabble

-

Sukuna thinks he's lost his mind.

He means it figuratively, obviously. But at this point he's sure he should've physically lost it already.

His nephew- of which he is currently babysitting- is currently on his couch, not a care in the world, half empty family sized bag of chips that was unopened not too long ago (fatface), kicking his feet like an adolescent boy in love, greasy fingers on the remote, and scrolling through youtube shorts on the tv???

Oh and worst of all he forgot to mention, the brat is wearing shoes.

The fact that he's even related to this thing makes him want to kill everyone else in the room and then himself.

"Itadori Yuji..." Sukuna seethes, it takes everything in him to not rip the brat's skeleton right out of his skin. He thinks it would be easy, if only a certain three people would let him (a shame, truly).

Yuji spares him a glance (the disrespect).

"Oh whats up unc"

"And what do you think you're doing?" The older of the two walks over and blocks the view of the tv, glaring down with his hands on his hips.

Yuji stares for a moment before opening his stupid food hole (as Sukuna describes it), "Have you ever seen that one meme, no one looks good from below? Well you're the version where they-"

Sukuna promptly picks him up by his foot, shaking him as a few chip bits fall off Yuji's shirt, "I literally just cleaned the house you freeloading fiend. Have you seen what a mess you've made?"

"You clean the house everyday you freak. Now put me down! I swear I was gonna clean up afterwards anyways." Yuji attempts to wiggle his way out of Sukuna's grip, he gets nowhere (predictably).

"Brat. You don't even know where the vacuum is, were you planning on picking them up one by one?"

"Ugh you're such a housewife, if I didn't know any better I'd assume you- MMM"

The sound of the code being put into the front door quickly stops Sukuna who shoves his free hand into Yuji's face, effectively shutting him up as well.

Sukuna grins when he sees you walk in, holding Yuji as if he were a first place catch for the annual bass fishing competition.

The sight makes you pause and contemplate your life decisions.

"Sukuna... put Yuji down, all the blood's rushing to his head."

Yuji is dropped immediately.

"OWWWWWWWW"

Your eyes trail around the living space and then back to the two children, "Does someone want to explain what's happening? And why there are shoe tracks in my house?" You make eye contact with your husband (who practically regresses 15 years in age when your nephew is around), he looks at you then uses his middle finger to point at Yuji.

Said boy, still recovering on the floor, whines, "Mann why can't I have a cool wine aunt and normal uncle?"

"Yuji if I were a wine aunt I wouldn't even be your aunt. Now are you gonna clean up this mess or should I make you?"

"On it! Whatever you say ma'am!" Yuji scrambles away after saluting and then pops back up from the hallway, realizing something crucial.

"Where are the cleaning supplies again?"

You sigh.

.

Yuji's finished with cleaning when he joins (intrudes, in Sukuna's words) you and his uncle on the couch, another episode of criminal minds running in the background.

You've changed from your work clothes into something more comfortable, snuggled into Sukuna's side as you start, "You know, if Spencer existed in real life I'd consider leaving you for him."

The tattooed man can only cringe in disgust at your behavior, "We're literally married, woman. You would leave me for that??"

He gives you and the tv an incredulous look. You can only giggle at his reaction, "You're like a child sometimes." His disapproval worsens, and you consider continuing to tease him but go with your better judgement (before he decides not to cook dinner, even though he always does anyways).

"I'm sorry hubby, forgive me?" Sukuna scoffs but accepts the affection anyways, he always does.

Yuji's voice interrupts the moment, "Ew you guys are so nasty (his parents are way worse), but speaking of children... when am I gonna get a cousin?"

The young boy can only watch as you two glance at each other then back at him, casually dropping an "Oh, Soon" then moving on completely. It takes him a second to process.

"WHAT."

-

unckuna my love

reblogs & comments are greatly appreciated :]

thank you for reading, have a blessed week

not fully proofread or edited

[slasherslittlesimp]

How You Meet- Bo Sinclair

You awkwardly walk alongside Wade and Carly as you enter the town of Ambrose. Just moments ago you were in a truck with a friendly but off putting male who offered you all a ride into town to get a fan belt after Wade's broke or something. Not caring much for sports, you volunteered to go with both of them since it sounded more interesting than riding with the others.

The two talk with each other as you simply follow after them in silence. Approaching the place Lester mentioned, Wade calls out into the place to see if this Bo guy is there. His calls are answered by silence so he turns away to look around the small town. "Hey, there's that House of Wax." Wade points at the building.

"Wade, what about the fan belt?" Carly questions, wondering why her boyfriend is heading away from the place he needs to be.

"There's no one at the station." He explains with a shrug as he continues on.

Carly sighs as she follows after him, you following her. "Why don't we check the church?"

You look towards the church at the end of the road, wondering why she thinks there'll be people there of all places. As they both enter the building, you simply stand outside, not wanting to go inside. It doesn't take long for them to walk back out, both of them looking embarrassed. "What happened?"

"There was a funeral going on." Carly scrunches her nose as she moves to stand next to you. You nod in understanding. That explains why the entire town is seemingly empty. In a small place like this if someone dies then pretty much everyone will be attending the funeral.

An older male exits the church, lighting a cigarette as he walks down the steps and past the fence. "Hey, man. Sorry about walking in."

"We didn't know..." Carly trails off, obviously feeling bad.

"You shouldn't have walked in." The man speaks and you can't help but to blush a bit at his voice. He's certainly attractive and doesn't seem to be all that much older than you. You're in your late twenties- older than both of your cousins who just so happen to be Carly and Nick.

"Yeah, I know. It's just that we're having car trouble. We're not from this town." Wade tries to explain.

"We're looking for Bo. He works at the gas station."

"You found him." You zone out of the conversation after that, simply looking at Bo. He finishes his cigarette before flicking it aside, turning around to face all of you. His gaze flickers towards you, likely only just now realizing that you're there as well. After a bit of talking the other two go to walk away while he heads back towards the church.

You hesitate to follow after them, glancing between Bo and them. "Hey, Bo?" You call out, catching his attention. He stops walking, turning towards you slightly with a raised brow. "I'm sorry about interrupting the funeral. I'm also very sorry for your loss."

He seems surprised as he turns fully towards you before walking down the steps to stand directly in front of you. He looks down at you, his eyes scanning your face as bit as you try to keep from blushing. "No need to apologize, doll. You're not the one who barged in uninvited."

"I'm still sorry." You mutter, giving him an apologetic smile which makes his eyes flicker down to your lips. Without letting him say anything else, you turn away to rush after your friends who seemingly disappeared. You have no idea where they went so you simply make your way back to the station to wait for either them or Bo to show up.

It feels like hours before Wade and Carly finally come back, apparently having just finished at the House of Wax which wasn't even open. You hold back your scolding, finding it especially disrespectful that not only did they barge in on a funeral but they also broke into a place and likely messed with things they shouldn't have.

To top it all of, Wade also enters Bo's shop without him being there. You want to speak up to keep Carly from going in after him but hold back since she likely won't listen to you anyways. Instead, you lean against the wall outside as you once again wait for them. Their voices drift out of the building though you can't really hear what they're saying.

"Where's your friends?" Bo questions, approaching out of nowhere.

You jump slightly, having not noticed him walking up. "They kind of went into your shop. Apparently they have a real knack for breaking and entering that they didn't tell me about." You joke, trying to not feel bad about the situation. Hopefully he's not actively pissed that they went into his shop.

He steps up next to you, looking through the window to see that Wade and Carly are indeed inside the building. He smirks slightly, turning towards you with an amused look. "I'm gonna mess with them."

"Have fun with that." You snort, shaking your head as you also smile. Bo's eyes flicker to your lips once again before he turns away to enter his shop, leaving you outside alone. You can barely hear them inside but you can tell that he startled both of them. Soon enough they all step back outside, Carly motioning for you to follow after them.

"So, is it too late to sign up for that beauty pageant?" Wade questions, nudging his girlfriend with his arm.

"Unfortunately it is, because I know someone who would've won hands down." You don't see his eyes glance towards you as he says this. You're used to people thinking Carly is more attractive than you so you simply assume he's talking about her like everyone else usually does.

"That House of Wax was pretty cool." Wade comments, changing the subject once again.

"You went inside?"

"Yeah, it was unlocked so, you know..." Wade shrugs.

"Everything seems to be unlocked around you, don't it?" Bo understands now why you said what you did earlier. He sighs before launching into a story about the House of Wax and some woman named Trudy who apparently was the original artist of the place. After that you arrive at what is apparently his house. "Why don't you guys hop in while I go get that fan belt?"

You hop into his truck without question, Carly getting in after you while Wade mentions using his restroom. Bo takes one last glance at you before leading him into the house. If only you knew that things would be going down hill very soon.

[anonymityisfunwriter]

in honor of bucky's birthday...

someone asked me a few months ago if i would write another story as a continuation of twin flames once cap 4 and thunderbolts came out... i didn't even think you guys would want that, but having seen cap 4 i wanted to give you guys a little glimpse of what i think sunshine would be doing in cap 4!

cap 4 spoilers below the cut!

in my head, there's really only two options, either sunshine would be with sam or with bucky:

if sunshine stays with sam...

i think Sunshine would end up being the one weaponized against General Ross.

you look down at your hands, only now gaining awareness of where you are. the bright lights of the sirens and the helicopters beating above you blind you.

"don't do this."

"sam? sam, what happened?"

"you tried to kill the president..."

a shocked breath lodges itself in your throat, "no, no, i wouldn't - i didn't."

sam reaches out an appeasing hand to you, "just stay calm. we'll figure this out. it's going to be okay."

"you can't let them send me back there. i don't want to go back. please." you shake your head over and over, tears streaming down your face, "please, sam. i don't - i don't want to go. don't let them take me. i didn't - i didn't want to hurt anyone."

"i know, i know, but you have to. i'm going to get you out, but you have to go with them."

you can't help the sob that escapes you as you feel the cold metal clamp down on your wrists.

"hey, easy," sam barks.

"i'm sorry. i'm sorry," you repeat over and over again. "i didn't mean to."

if sunshine is with bucky:

"this is a private room," sam grits out. "go away."

"i won't lie, i was expecting a warmer welcome."

sam sucks in a breath, tearing his eyes away from joaquin for the first time in hours. he turns on his heels, throwing his heavy arms around you, engulfing you in a warm embrace. "god, how did you - you have the best timing, you know that?"

you smile into his shoulder, "hi, sammy."

"i'm here too, in case anyone cares."

sam playfully groans, "you brought bucky?"

"we're sort of a package deal now, remember?"

"ugh... don't remind me. joaquin framed the save the date."

the reminder of joaquin quiets the room again. bucky grips sam's shoulder in a comforting grip, "he's going to be okay, sam."

"no, steve made a mistake... and i don't know why i thought i could do this."

"no, he didn't."

sam shakes his head, gesturing towards joaquin, "you saw what happened out there?"

bucky nods, "you did your best. you did what you could."

"exactly, i did what i could. i mean, how many alien invasions did steve stop?"

"3."

"and i couldn't even stop this from happening."

"steve didn't pick you because you're the strongest, he picked you because you're you. he gave people something to believe in. you give them something to aspire to."

sam's eyes narrow slightly, "did your speechwriters help you with that?"

bucky shrugs, "maybe the ending a little bit."

"he's right though," you chime in. "you're doing your best and you're doing great."

sam looks on at joaquin, "it doesn't feel like it."

"it's going to be okay, sam. he's going to be okay," you promise. "let me know if you need a hand, you know where to find me."

sam playfully scoffs. "i can't be dragging in a future congressman's girlfriend into the front lines, now can i?"

you shrug, "i mean, i won't tell them if you don't."

"you know i'm still right here, right?" bucky incredulously huffs, his hand resting on his hips. "and it's fiancee, not girlfriend."

"yes, we know already," sam groans.

"anyway, we should get going, james."

bucky nods, jutting his head toward the door, "we've got a plane to catch. stupid fundraising thing."

"thanks for coming. both of you."

"anytime." bucky hugs sam as he heads toward the door, "love you, buddy."

"love you, sam." you hug sam tightly one last time. with one last squeeze, you murmur in his ear, "but seriously, if you need a hand-"

"i heard that," bucky calls over his shoulder.

sam chuckles, nodding and mouthing, "i'll call you."

--

but anyway that was just a very rough idea of where i think our trio would be in cap 4. i suppose we'll get a better idea once we get thunderbolts.

Taglist: @marianita195 @meli18gonzalez @ludicbouquetfromearth @matchat3a @famousbreadcherryblossomsstuff @valoraxx @blue786sworld @buckyandgeraltsupremacy @geminigengar @ansaturn @ecolle @lexhalstead3 @ybflkmj @mediocre-daydreams @shanye1112 @thegirlnextdoorssister @toomanyfanficsbruh @moonlightreader649 @breathtaking-cynthia @mirikusashes @beans-and-toast @niyahcoca @katiechikin @elxvrr @antiheroxsblog @infamouslyclumsy @krissydclayton93 @buckysbarnes @deadheadwbedhead @qualitygiantshoepsychic @whitexwolfxx310 @getosprettyboy @matchat3a @weallhaveadestiny @mostlymarvelgirl @honeydew3064 @michealharrypotter @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @withyoutilltheendoftheline @the-photo-hoe @rae-nna @sarachabeans1@double-shot-of-tequila @spookyparadisesheep @lunaalovesyouu @daisy-loves-bucky@roseproseposts @theoraekenslover@king814318 @maybesomedaytho @carlie-babes99 @sunshinechikin @as-white-as-snow-love @melala1030 @badasswlthafatass @armystay89 @multiversefanfics @cherrysscinema @breathlesspieceofdeath @ravenn-darkholme @bxckybxrnes24 @guiltyasreid @bellabarnes1378 @blithecapricorn @mrsnikstan @marvelatthem @capswife @1-akira-2 @generalmoonpolice

[inky-the-artist]

we're so back‼️

I had a thought process behind this, some yapping about their backstory is under the cut for anyone interested<3

this specifically takes place during monster roadtrip, so i will use this as an opportunity for me to finally share some kind of backstory for them:)

Liam and Inky were highschool sweethearts, she had a massive crush on him for months, but she was the popular girl and he had his whole anti-mainstream thing, so they didn't get along at all at first. all of Inky's friends were absolutely done with her because there were so many other monsters that liked her, and she had to fall in love with the one guy who didn't. (Zoe loved the shipping material though and most of the others were pretty invested too, just for the tea)

(one thing about Inky is that she's got ridiculous charisma both for story and comedic purposes, because in universe, she was drawn by a succubus. she isn't aware of this - she doesn't know any other monster of her kind, and she has never met her creator, which is a big part of her character arc)

she and Liam eventually started talking more after they accidentally interacted a few times and Liam realized she had an actual personality and wasn't just the cliché popular girl. he eventually fell in love with her too, which caused a lot of mixed feelings for him, but he eventually just went with it - very slowburn, very sunshine x grumpy, very cute🎀 they never realy officially started dating but practically acted like a couple anyway, at least outside of school. they went to prom together, it was a huge thing because. high school romance. or something.

after they graduated, Liam had his issues to work through and wasn't ready for a committed relationship, but Inky promised she'd wait for him for as long as he needs. neither of them went to monster camp but they did watch the stars together (I haven't play nearly as much of camp as I did od prom and roadtrip, so that's another reason for this gap lol).

they were on and off for however long the gap between monprom and monroad is. it was a bit of a rollercoaster, sometimes they talked all the time, met up with no problem, sometimes they haven't even texted for days or weeks, because Inky wanted to give Liam the space he needed. she'd let him ghost her and reach out when he felt like it, and she always acted like nothing ever happened, both because she'd just be happy to see him, but because she doesn't want him to feel guilty for working on himself. he still did, but her not giving him a hard time for it helped a lot.

monroad takes place during the longest period of them not talking that ever took place, going on almost six weeks. Liam's been getting therapy, which has been helping, and he's been meaning to reach out to Inky, but six weeks with no contact is a long time and he simply felt bad, so he kept putting it off. he joined Scott and Polly (and an optional player character lol) on their roadtrip as a hitchhiker and stayed with them for a week.

at the end of it, on a rest stop, they ran into none other than Inky, who was also hitchhiking. once again, she acted like nothing was ever wrong and she and Liam spent the whole night at the bench, catching up, talking things out. Inky confesses that she got evicted from her apartment a month ago, and despite being able to get a new home, she's been crashing on Joy's couch. She didn't want to move anywhere without discussing it with Liam first, and he'd offer her to move in on the spot, but they decided it'd be wise to sleep on it for a few days. she decided to join the roadtrip.

nothing too romantic happened for the next few days, because they were constantly around the others and Doing Activities™, that was until the gang decided to get a rental for the night. the rest spontaneously decided to go to a random concert nearby, which was too convenient, so Inky and Liam decided to stay behind. post-character development Liam is literally just a yapper (this is canon and i love it), and after the full evening of Inky listening to his voice and staring at his mouth, and months of mutual longing, everything finally escalated.

(also, Inky's asexual, and I hc Liam being on the ace spectrum as well, so they straight up took clothes of fully for aesthetic purposes because that seems entirely in character)

that's all i got so far. after spending the evening and night together, Liam realized he does want her to move in with him, so that's what going on after that 🫶

if you got this far, thank you for reading!! let me know what you think, I appreciate it🩷

[yzafre]

Rise Magic Watch - Anatawa Hitorijanai

Alriiiigiht, let's talk about unlocking the Hamato Ninpo - starting with Karai and April.

So, there's a bunch of little scenes that tell me they had to wrap up the story on ta time-limit, but this one is THEE scene that lives rent-free in my head.

"Now you must teach the family." / "How can I? I'm not o - I'm not one of you!" / "Oh, my child... you have always been one of us."

So this is a very sweet scene... but Karai's got no clue who April is. They barely exchanged a single line! Karai didn't even get to see April's dynamic with the boys! We, the viewers, know April is entirely family, but Karai's got no context for it.

That being said, let's talk about the magic. So, Karai was already doing her... glowy deal when April showed up. Which is interesting in context - if you remember, Shredder's whole deal was to consume Karai's Hamato essence. He seems to think he's done so - specifically, he's "defeated" her - though he's not seeing the effects in himself he expected.

So... what does that mean for the specific way Karai is dying? What are the options?

This is just... a thing for Hamato? When they die, their spirit starts lifting out of them? There's some benefit to not leaving behind a corpse. Though, looking to the future, April IS a Hamato, and she does leave behind a body in the bad timeline. But then, this could be to-do with going out while mystically over-taxed?

It could be that Shredder DID steal her "Hamato essence", and this whole glowy-deal is like... her bleeding out from where that was ripped from her, but spiritually.

Alternatively, Shredder tried to take her essence but failed for various reasons, and instead just left spiritual injuries which... once again, left her bleeding out from her soul.

There's options here. I'm a mix of the last and first - specifically, that she's all glowy because of a spiritual wound, but stepping away from the glowing, that any Hamato can choose to pass their spirit on with their final breath and perhaps in other ways? That was the inspiration for this bit of art from almost a year ago.

Anyways, April is now host to a ghost.

"I went to the lair - which is totally destroyed - and found Karai and she turned into light an now I hear her voice inside my head!"

This seems to give her:

Karai's commentary/instruction in her head.

General memories from Karai's life?

Inherited muscle memory.

An outfit change????

Just based on what we see. Honestly, the Hamato connection with past generations is so fun and has a lot of potential for world-building.

Next, we got the awakening of the boy's Ninpo.

"Karai says to access your inner power, you have to stay calm and feel connected to one another."

We're all super familiar with the exchange between Karai, Raph, and April here.

"Hamato Ninpo does not come from you alone. It comes from all who came before you, from your family. You have to trust your family." / "It's not all on you, Raph. We're here for each other - trust that." / "I do trust my family." / "No. Trust us the way we trust you."

It specifically targets the first time Raph went full-kaiju when catching Leo in Bug Busters as an example. I think the implication here is that Raph did, indeed, tap the slightest bit into the Hamato Ninpo to get the boost he needed to pull this off - but wasn't entirely able to connect. Possibly because, while he was entirely focused on his family, he was still in an... individual mind-set? It was on him to save his brother. This is all sub-text I'm reading into this.

In any case, it gives him the idea for the Big Trust Fall.

They all leap - acting in concert, with the same goal in mind. And then....

Raph not getting any glow-stuff - whether it be shoulder-markings or whoosh-y magic streamers - is a CRIME.

Anyways, we get the magical girl transformation sequence. And we get closer and closer to the question that vexes me - what is the difference and/or overlap between the Hamato Ninpo (collective power) and the boys' Mystic Abilities (individual expression).

So. What we see here is this: mystic energy is streaming out of the Hamato crest, but in their individual colors and taking a shape that relates to each individual. Mikey keeps his curls of fire, Donnie gets blocky shapes like his shoulder markings, and Leo gets... okay, so it looks like electricity in the stills, but in motion it moves in a way that's part electricity, part fire, and part water. It's hard to pin down - a bit like Leo.

Generally, this seems to also like.... boost their power? I mean, mystic energy is spilling out of them. There's something of an implication that they couldn't reach their full power without being in-sync like this.

Then, we see the three separate energies combine into a single green hand to reach for Raph. This, for sure, is purely related to the Hamato Energy - the ability to combine your energies into something greater, as well as a bit of that "make something from nothing" we saw Karai doing.

This biggest question, to me, is this: Do their abilities come from the Hamato Ninpo, or are they simply boosted by it? How do I put this...

Option 1: By being a Hamato, your... soul/spirit/whatever is connected to this well of power, and your part of it ends up developing into a unique power.

Option 2: Because of the way they were created by Draxum, the turtles ended up with the start of some mystic abilities upon mutation. Because of their connection to Splinter, they are also Hamato. Over time, the two separate abilities became more or less intertwined, allowing them to work together or use one to boost the other.

Ahhh, was that clear? Honestly, trying to tease out the difference here makes my brain hurt. But, basically: is source of their abilities being off-brand yokai, or is it being Hamato?

We've got a few more examples of Hamato Ninpo in action next episode, along with a LOT of examples of their upgraded mystic abilities - and that's not getting into the Movie. That being said, I really don't think there's anything in the text that fully clarifies this, so it might just be up to interpretation/head-canon.

What I will say is that the ability for them to combine their energies - not just make them work in-tandem a la the teleporting, jet-powered, fire-fisted Raph construct, but combining them into a single new entity as we see here - could have had some fascinating potential for really cool sequences if the series had continued.

Alright! One more episode! and then at some point the movie! It's time for the COOLEST fight scene! See you next time!

[fresne999]

Half way through the journey of our analyses

I feel like roughly half of the analysis I'm reading about OFMD S2 is folks who clearly fixated on a character (it's Izzy, it's always Izzy that inspires this kind of analysis) write analyses that cause the 2nd response of, "Um…did you ever study literary analysis in school."

Now I come at this from a slightly odd place in that I did study literary analysis in school (30+ years ago) where I learned it's possible to interpret anything about any way, because we're all bringing different lenses to the analysis. Which isn't to say that an author can't have an intended interpretation. 

Dante in Canto V of Inferno (Divine Comedy) would still like folks to understand fixating on the two damned-lovers and ignoring the details that the artist is putting in there for you to catch about how they are damned because they won't change the toxic patterns that got them there in the first place. Also, they can't because they are in hell, and hell is like that. That Dante-the-writer had Dante-the-character swoon over those same two damned-lovers (because Dante-the-character is on a journey of moral correction) is hilarious, but doesn't make it any less the point of that section of the work, but I digress.

As a career, I am very aware that folks love to misinterpret what is meant to be very clear instructions. Of course, I'm writing policies and procedures, which is a bit different from writing fiction, and is worlds away from creating a t.v. show. But that's the life experience that I always bring to literary analysis. Frequently, people choose their interpretations to fit what they want to see, and that's part of being human.

I've seen a fair number of folks interpret Izzy's redemption arc in S2 as one of a queer man struggling with disabilities and mental health issues whose struggle is made meaningless by his demise. Which sure, you could interpret it that way and in that it's coming from I'm sure an emotional place, I get it. And hmmm… I might give this interpretation more credence  if I hadn't read a lot of Izzy analysis for S1 that was wildly different than the text.

So let's take a step back. 

First, know the rules of the literary universe: OFMD is a show where the reality is not ours. It is either the Core Universe or something very close to it. BTW: If you've never heard of Core Universe or read the seminal BtVS+HtLJ "When Hellmouth's Collide" (https://www.ltljverse.com/index2.htm), a Core Universe is one where everything lines up. Row boats are magic, and where there is a Badminton, he will accidentally stab/shoot himself. 

Terminology more befitting of that fancy literature degree might be to say that OFMD functions along the logic of Magical Realism. Characters will appear briefly for the purposes of the story and then disappear not to be mentioned again (Nana, Calico Jack, Mary Read & Anne Bonny). Things align because they are meant to align. It is a universe where the Gravy Basket is a real place, and meant to be taken seriously.  It's also a universe where a man may become a seagull, because he loves the sea. You change for love, but the ways you change may be positive or toxic. 

They can result in a bird that never gets to know rest. Always flying over the sea. Or they lead to becoming a bird, who can float in the sea or land on a unicorn's leg. 

Transformation. 

Anyway, S1 - Stede commissioned a ship with secret passageways. It did not have a buxom mermaid on the prow, nor something more befitting a ship named the Revenge. He commissioned a unicorn prow and went off to become a pirate. 

A not particularly violent pirate. But a pirate who didn't have a problem with the violence of piracy. See Stede telling Lucius (hardest working man on the ship in S1) to take notes during a violent raid where the show's logo was literally carved into the chest of a dead man. 

BTW: The tone about violence is darker in S2, but the violence was there in S1. It was just presented in a more whimsical way. The nose jar was full of noses in S1. We heard about Blackbeard's violence. A man was skinned alive off screen, but we focused on the Prussian (but also sort of French) party. 

What Izzy needed to be redeemed from was established in S1. The problem is that folks who interpreted Izzy as a) the central focus of the show and b) a put upon manager just trying to do right by his crew (or as one Tumblerina referred to him as the man/father of the family going out to hunt - excuse me while I vomit - and support his family as men must do), are not going to understand what Izzy's S2 arc was all about. 

Ed and Stede are the main characters in a romantic story. There are other characters with their own arcs, but they are the main characters.

In S1, Stede created a safe space where characters had a chance to breathe for the first time. Possibly ever, and as a result revisited parts of themselves they'd lost. Wee John got back in touch with his roots as the son of a seamstress. Frenchie got back to what he loves, scamming the rich. The Swede sang like a siren of the sea, because it doesn't always have to be scary. 

Ed had his first good time in years. After expressing suicidal ideation to Izzy because of his terminal boredom in S1.E4 - Discomfort in a Married state, Ed found himself some balance. Some sweet marmalade. 

Ed and Izzy were in a toxic relationship that only reinforced their toxic behavior. And yes, I'm going to overuse the word toxic. While piracy is a place where you can go be yourself and shag whoever you want (whatever happens at sea stays at sea), it's not a place where you can be soft. Gentle. Emotionally open. Available. 

Ed's only path out that he could see at the time was to plan to skin the face of the man who built a ridonculous boat with a unicorn on the prow and wear it for the rest of his life. A plan to send Stede to Doggy Heaven. 

BTW: This is why Izzy uses the line in S2.E3 - the Innkeeper, that they put Ed down like a mad dog, so that Stede could reply that they sent Ed to Doggy Heaven. Reiterating this concept of piracy as violence, as taking away faces / identity / lives, but also losing one's own. Forgetting even what day of the year it is. Also revealing that Stede knew about Ed & Izzy's plan to murder him, send Stede to doggy heaven, and had moved on. 

This is also why the respite in S2.E4 - Fun and Games is so critical. Mary Read/Anne Bonney are portrayed as direct parallels to Stede/Ed. They are selling what are, no doubt, the spoils of their piracy. But they've chosen a remote location with no community, but each other and a life where they are not actually communicating. Which on its surface is where Ed and Stede end up, and yet…the Revenge can sail back. They are on the shore facing the sea, not in a jungle lost from a clear view. I'll quote the relevant Dante in just a bit, never fear.

Ed and Stede's new inn has the potential for a solid foundation, because the unicorn has been planted firmly in the ground, and if we get an S3, I firmly expect the unicorn leg to have transformed into a tree, because I've read a lot of medieval literature and that's how that sort of thing works. 

Well, it could be a penis tree (this was a thing in medieval marginalia), but somehow I don't think it will be. 

 But I'm getting a little ahead of myself.

Back in S1, the plan to murder Stede and take his identity broke down despite Izzy trying to perform an intervention to get Ed back into the toxic soup, and ended with Ed curled up in a bathtub and opening up about murdering his father. An image the show chose to flash on the screen multiple times in S2 just in case folks forgot that this was a traumatizing event for Ed, and was itself the culmination of years of traumatic abuse at his father's hands. 

Just as Stede kept flashing back to the moment his father tells him what it is to be a man, and kills an animal, the blood splashing on Stede's wee little face. 

That this is the point of the show. Transforming past trauma. It's there. You always carry the scars. Sometimes, you decide to tattoo yourself with the image of the thing you fear, and then the thing you fear is always there, but you've got to keep moving forward. To stay in one place, to stay trapped in the same emotion/action, is hell. I've read a lot of lit crit of Dante's Inferno. Trust me, it's the same thing.

Izzy's redemption arc is firmly based in the events of S1E6 - Here Dragons Be, because it's where the pustule of his relationship with Ed breaks. His attempted intervention fails to get Ed to kill Stede, so Izzy tries to kill Stede. Not realizing that a) Stede is a main character and b) this is a Core Universe show. Where it's possible to win a duel by being stabbed in the left side of your gut and stay there for many hours and not die. So he loses the 1 thing that defines him, his job. 

Izzy's redemption arc is firmly based in the events of s1E8 - We Gull Way Back, where he enlists Calico Jack to lure Ed off the boat (with all the toxic masculinity that entailed) so that the British could show up and shoot the head off the unicorn, and kill Stede. So Izzy can crawl back into his old patterns / job / life. 

Izzy's redemption arc is firmly based in the big drama confrontation in S1E10 - Wherever You Go There You Are, when as a person whose entire identity is tied up in being Blackbeard's First Mate and after realizing that he couldn't cut it as a captain on his own, he does whatever the f- he can to get Ed back into the toxic soup so he can get his old role/job back.  

This isn't to say that Ed's off the deep end actions in S2.E1&2 aren't his own choices. He is a main character. His emotional arc is one of the driving forces of the show. But they are the choices of a man who wants to die. After a lifetime of violent action that had been increasingly drowning him, he wants to die in the violence of battle, but the enemy are never good enough. He wants Izzy to kill him, but Izzy won't. Until he does…sort of. He wants to die in a storm. He's carving notches on his wall hoping to lure Ned Low to him so that he can die in pain. But Ed is the devil and does not die.

Except Ed's not the devil. He doesn't have a head made of smoke. He's a man. Not a fisherman. Not a fisher of men, and what an interesting attempt to go Christ himself off into the wilderness only to be fired for not being that good at it, and then receive his letter from the deep. 

Because in a show full of magical realism, the bottles with messages will reach the intended recipient eventually.

"In the middle of the journey of our life, I came to myself in a dark wood for the straight way was lost. Ah, how hard a thing it is to say what that wood was. So savage and harsh and strong, that the thought of it renews my fear. It is so bitter that death is little more so. But to speak of the good that I found there, I will tell of the other things I saw…and like one with laboring breath comes forth from the deep onto the shore, who turns back to the perilous water and stares, so my spirit still fleeing turned to gaze upon the pass that has never left anyone alive." Dante, Canto 1, Inferno. 

Instead of dying, Ed goes not to Purgatory (sorry I'd quote the opening lines, but Inferno actually works better here), but to the Gravy Basket, where he confronts the spirit of Hornigold. Dead spirit. Aspect of Ed's self. Both. Neither. Hated. Self. Unkillable. 

Is saved by a goldfish incarnation of Stede. 

But just as the imaginary as Stede's vision of what / who he thinks he needs to be for Ed, this is not true. Life being what it is, Ed and Stede rush when they need to go slow. They break apart because they are saying words, but the other person is hearing based on their own interpretation. 

BTW: The clue Dante-the-writer gives the reader in Canto V of Inferno is how one of the damned lovers, Francesca, explains how she hooked up with her brother-in-law, Paulo. She describes reading an Arthurian romance. She and Paulo kissed when Gwenevere and Lancelot kissed in the story. Except the version they are reading (and Dante tells the reader which version this is) was intended as a cautionary tale. Also, Paulo and Francesca were real people who were murdered by Francesca's husband when he caught them together. So there is that too.

I always like it in fiction when characters misinterpret each other because they hear based on their life experiences and don't hear the things that are said/unsaid based on the life experiences of the other person speaking. That's good writing. It's also how we end up with wildly varying interpretations of works of fiction.

But I digress.

Izzy's S2 arc is that he must let go of his relationship with Ed and turn to others. He must learn to let go of toxic masculinity and let in softness. Not weakness. Water is not weak, but it is soft. Calypso, goddess of the sea, is not weak. Her birthday is whatever day you need it to be. She is vast and deep and soft and relentless. 

In Ro-sham-bo, it's a shame that there is not a gesture for water. Because it is not paper that defeats stone, but water that wears away the stone. Of course, scissors wouldn't do much to water either, so that would sort of break Ro-sham-bo, so I suppose it must stay as it is.

It is through a craft's project that the crew of the Revenge find healing. Turn Izzy into the unicorn. A unicorn that Izzy's own actions caused to be decapitated with a British cannon ball in S1. That Izzy rendered legless (drunk). But the Revenge is a boat. They just need to swim/sail. It is through a craft's project that Izzy is able to offer healing to Lucius, who in turn is then able to turn their art away from fixating on Ed, and the trauma that he's been through and back towards love, and Black Pete. 

But it's not possible to see Izzy's S2 arc, if you didn't interpret S1 Izzy as needing to go through his own gravy basket. 

That Izzy dies because his transformation is necessary. He can't leave Ed, and if he doesn't leave Ed, then Ed can't stop being Blackbeard. The kracken. He literally tells Ed this as he chooses to transform. To free the world of Blackbeard, so Ed can be Ed. Yet, I've read so many posts by folks saying, "But why did he have to die?" Which sure, you can choose not believe what the character says while dying.

Which is a narrative privilege. To get a good dying speech. "There he is" get to be transmutted from an attack to an actual seeing. The larger than life concept of a smoke headed pirate can waft away.

Stories are hard to kill. They live on long past us, and as long as someone is remembered, especially in a universe like OFMD, we live. 

Though always reject the gift of a clock. That's someone telling you that you've only got so many hours left of life. If you are a character in a story. 

Thus the other parallel in this season is Izzy to Auntie and Ed to Zheng Yi Sao. Auntie must allow Zheng softness. Izzy must go through a sea change to something new and strange. Also, this would be a case of Doylistically the writers needed to line up Olu with Stede for that to work, and thus the new configurations of Olu and Jim's relationship, which, shrug, could be poly. Could be friends to lovers to friends.  Woulda, coulda, had more time, but that's on Max for not giving us 2 more episodes.

Prince Richard was trying to become a concept, but was too in love with the mechanics of it. Stede was trying to become a concept too. Found his fame, and all too quickly the toxic end of that particular route. Magical Realism was on his side until he tried to face down Zheng Yi Sao, the Queen of Pirates, and then the rules of the story weren't. Because those clocks were ticking. Everyone was in a very dark wood. The memory of blood splashed on Stede's face as a little boy was a warning. It was a reminder. It was the wrong lessons we take from our childhood and must unlearn to become whole.

Having the final shot of the show being Buttons landing on the unicorn leg as a reminder that this is a show about transformation. One thing becoming another thing. Somewhere the dead are dancing in Calypso's court. A dance below the sea and on the sea and with the sea. While the living keep sailing on their magic ship to do…I don't know. 

Because the Golden Age of Piracy is coming to an end. They'll go create new worlds and new places to be. Transforming.

If we get no more of the show, this is a resolution.

Since I've been quoting Dante, I'm going to end this with the final vision in Paradiso. Because folks who haven't been reading my analysis for the last 30 years / read it, may not realize that the Divine Comedy (a story that begins in sorrow and ends in joy) ends with the vision of a 3 way rainbow. 

"In the profound and shining Being of the deep Light, three circles appeared, of three colours, and one magnitude: one seemed refracted by the other, like Iris’s rainbows, and the third seemed fire breathed equally from both. O how the words fall short, and how feeble compared with my conceiving!…Power, here, failed the deep imagining: but already my desire and will were rolled, like a wheel that is turned, equally, by the Love that moves the Sun and the other stars."

[byechristopher]

WE'RE ALONE.

– Chris Sturniolo angst/fluff.

depressed-stoner!chris x f!reader

Author's note: there's a playlist I have on spotify (literally my childhood) that 100% inspired me to write this – hits too close to home, pft. So here, Chris smoking w33d. Do not copy/steal my work. :) didn't proof read.

Warnings: w33d obviously, mentions of alcohol and depression. Sad, messy love. Also, super long – don't know what else, tbh. This is JUST a fan-fiction.

Playlist:

Time was passing by and the voices from inside the living room wouldn't stop – I can hear them getting louder and louder. I bring my knees close to my chest, hugging myself and I turn the volume of my speakers up.

It's always like this; they get loud and then they pretend this never happened, like I never heard what they said to each other. Or how they talked about this family, this house. It was exhausting for me, to say the least.

A few hours later, with the loud music still filling the dark room, I decided it was maybe time to sleep. This would all end faster that way. But when I was about to do that, I saw.. something out the window? I know I did. There it is again... hold on – a shoe? I get up, a little scared, and look outside. I knew it. I open the window.

"Chris, what the fuck.." I yelled and I saw Chris picking up his shoe, jumping around for a few seconds before wearing it again.

Oh, Chris. We've been close friends for so long. As long as I can remember – my childhood is filled with memories of him. I've always been so thankful. He has always been the safe place that I desperately needed but never really knew I wanted. He would always be there whenever I needed him and if course, I did the same thing for him. He was worth it anyways.

"Come on!" he yells, not caring if my parents heard him.

"Really, Chris? Your shoe?" I place my elbows on the windowsill, laughing a little bit.

"I couldn't find any rocks. Now shut up, and jump!" he grins and I roll my eyes.

I turn the volume down, not all the way down, enough to not let my parents hear what is going on in here, but also without disturbing their sleep. I quickly wear a big, black hoodie, I put on my lace up boots and after grabbing my phone, wallet and cigarettes, I walk towards the windowsill – I've been sneaking out my room ever since I was little, I cannot believe I'm still doing it in my twenties. But who cares.

I place my foot on the windowsill, grabbing a branch of the tree that is right outside my room (thank God), and I climb up that tree till it's safe enough for me to jump – Chris catches me and we fall down, like every other time. We laugh.

"Hi." he says, it's simple, but it makes me smile.

"Hi. I didn't know you were here – I thought you were coming back next Tuesday." I say and I keep walking next to him; we know exactly where we're going.

"I was supposed to, yeah. But I didn't like it there, so I left. Plus, you are here." he has a little smile on his face and only now do I notice the paper bag in his hand, "beers." he says before I get to say anything. I nod, smiling.

We keep on walking and about ten minutes later, we finally reach our destination. There is an old, abandoned school that we found out about a few years ago. I still remember that day – I was so scared, especially when I saw these old stairs that were leading up to a big, rusty door. When Chris opened the door, though, we found out that there was a flat roof behind that door, old school chairs then and there. I smoked my first cigarette here. Also, my first blunt. Hah.

The chairs are still placed right in front of the parapet wall that's built along the edge of the flat roof. So we sit down – Chris is already rolling a blunt and I open two cans of beer, handing him his.

"Now. Tell me, what's wrong?" I break the silence abruptly. He doesn't look at me.

He doesn't need to tell me anything, I always know when he's not feeling well. And I know he wants to see me too, but that's not the exact reason he is here.

"Fought with my brothers." he murmurs and licks the wrap to seal the blunt while looking at me.

"Yeah, no shit. Why?" I watch him as I take a sip of my beer.

"Just bullshit. It doesn't matter. They know I'm here with you anyway." he mutters. His hair is a little messy and his hoodie is also too big for him, as usual, "what's wrong with you anyway?"

"The usual." I sigh and place my feet on the parapet wall, the can of beer in between my thighs, making my bare legs cold and making goosebumps rise on it – not the wisest choice to keep these shorts on.

We talk and talk and talk, for hours. We're both high, drinking beer and a mini bottle of vodka that was hidden in his big hoodie, we both had our legs hanging from that low wall and laughing like idiots.

He grabs the back of my head and brings me closer to him, his breath fanning over my lips, "missed this." he whispers and places his lips on mine. I groan in his mouth and start moving my lips against his, my tongue licking his bottom lip. He lets my tongue enter his mouth and I get up quickly to straddle his thighs, sitting on his lap so that I can be more comfortable, without breaking the kiss, of course.

His hands sneak under my hoodie and his cold fingers travel up my back, my hands are buried in his hair, tugging at it gently. The kiss is slow but hungry and I find myself getting lost in it. Then, it hits me. I part our lips and I place my forehead against his, my hands are placed against his chest, "I can't." I murmur.

I can still remember the last time this happened. And the previous time. And the time before that. Blah blah blah. But last time I said it was the last time, because I cried myself to sleep that night. Whenever we get high and we drink, we sometimes make out. Just sometimes. He's always the first one to make the move because I'm too scared. I told myself it wasn't that deep the first time it happened, but I was secretly craving the next time it would. When we didn't make out, I would go home disappointed. Crying, sometimes. I didn't know if I was subconsciously falling in love (or already in love) with Chris or just really deprived of affection, but I was more and more hurt each time it happened.

"What is it?" he whispers and grabs the nape of my neck with both hands, pulling me close to place a soft kiss on my forehead.

"Why.. do we do this, Chris?" I whisper, I'm sacred to even ask the question, but I have to. For my sanity.

"I thought you wanted it." he stiffens a bit, pulling away a little bit.

"I do. And so do you. But why do we want it?" I search for his eyes but he averts his gaze from me every time I try to.

"What kind of question is that.. we're high and we make out. It's not a big deal." he says and I know I will cry myself to sleep again tonight.

"It might not be. For you." I sigh and he tries to sit up, indirectly telling me to get off of him but I don't. He's uncomfortable. So am I. But we have to do this.

"You're fucking high and you're drunk. You don't know what you're saying." he shakes his head and looks away. He knows I know exactly what I'm saying and that's what pains me the most.

"I might be in love with you." I say and the silence gets louder than my goddamn parents earlier.

"I love you too, what does that have to do with anything.." he says, completely dodging what I just said to him.

"Chris. I'm fucking serious. I think I'm in love with you." I whisper and I cup his cheeks.

"Don't do this to me. I can't deal with this." he whispers back, closing his eyes for a moment.

"Do you love me like this, too?" I ask the question I dread the most.

"We can't do this. This just won't work. We're a fucking mess. How will we ever be good for each other? Can't you see it?" he says and my eyes fill with tears; I don't know what to say, because deep down I agree with him, "don't do this to me." he continues and I know he's talking about the tears in my eyes.

He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me as close as possible, kissing my cheeks to catch the tears that escape my eyes, "I just.. you know I can't. Can't do this again."

"Chris.. seriously? We were kids!" I open my eyes just to look at him.

I know I hurt him when we were younger. But that was years ago, he can't keep blaming me for it.

"Yes, fucking seriously. I carried that around for a long time. You knew I was in love with you. You were the only one I wanted to be with." he glares at me and I sigh.

"I've apologised a million times, Chris."

He wasn't wrong. I remember how hurt he was back then – I knew he was in love with me when we were young and took advantage of the affection he was giving me, even though I didn't want him. I didn't feel the same way he did. Or at least, I didn't know I did. So I cut him off out of the blue and told him I would never want him this way. To make sure he knew I never would, I kissed his best friend. I don't know why – I think I wanted to prove that I really didn't like him. Now that I think about it, I wanted to prove myself more than him.

"You apologised and I forgave you. But you can't come here and tell me you think you are in love with me. What does "think" mean?"

"I don't know, Chris! It's.. overwhelming." I groan and I get off his lap, walking towards the door. I don't want to leave. But I don't know what to do, "you hurt me too, Chris. Ever since we kissed for the first time, I haven't been able to do it with anyone else. Hell, every time I tried to even talk to another guy, I could only think of you." I yell.

"Well. We can't be together. That's all I know." he clears his throat and grabs a cigarette.

"That's all you have to say?" I turn around to look at him as he smokes.

Silence.

"That's all I have to say." he mumbles. He gets up. He leaves. I stand there. I grab my stuff and I leave, too. That's what I get for wanting to be with an emotionally unavailable guy, who I know will probably hurt, as much as I will probably hurt him. We're both messed up. Broken childhood with broken hearts.

I walk towards my house crying but I don't want to go home. It's almost 5 in the morning, it's cold and it's dark. I should be in his fucking arms now, not walking around with nowhere to go.

At 05:20, my phone rings. Chris. He is crying and my heart shatters.

"I am afraid I will hurt you more than you already are." he says and I cry, "I'm afraid that one day, my problems will make me unavailable for you and I can't imagine not being able to be there for you. Ever." he sniffles.

"I'm scared too, Chris.. but.. I want to be selfish this time. I want to be with you. I don't wanna think about my parents, I don't wanna think about your friends, I don't wanna think about anyone other than you. I know I am in love with you." I sit down on the pavement and I try to make him hear me as much as I can through the tears.

"Fucking hell. I am in love with you. Where are you? I'm coming."

I tell him and in less than two minutes I see him running towards me. I can see his red eyes and his wet cheeks. He sees me and immediately gets on his knees to be on my level, cups my tear-stained cheeks and kisses me with so much love that I can feel my heart beating normally again.

"You came quickly."

"I always come for you. I go wherever you go." he whispers in between kisses and we fall backwards – I'm on my back and he's kissing me again and again.

"Then never leave me."

"Never."

[admirationandromantics]

hi im annoying but like idgaf anymore

Chris. he's. big.

he's taller than Mike. Mike is originally 6'2.

DOES THAT MAKE CHRIS 6'3/4??

CAN WE SEE SOME BIG BUILD CHRIS???

ns...nsfw... i.. need heem

Ummmm yeah? YEAH! Fuck yeah I love that massive man. And you bet this guy is strong as hell at the same time! "I've got a lot of meat on my bones. This is all muscle down here" You bet it is. He works out, but because he promotes himself as the nerdy, funny guy, his build is more personal and not something he brags about.

And I see you. I think you're one of the reasons this blog isn't just Josh because that's what everyone wants!! Chris was the reason I started this thing a couple of months ago. There's too little about him!!!! (Don't get me wrong, Josh is fine as hell. I mean, it's literally Rami Malek we're talking about)

Chris taking up the whole door-space, causing you to have to press yourself through. Yes, you'll basically feel his abs and arms as you do.

You bet is you get unsteady, his arms are there to catch you, and catch you he will! Even with just one arm.

Omg, imagine being on a concert with him. Him leaning down so you can sit on his shoulders and scream your lungs out!!!

You're waking up together and he has classes early in the morning and you don't want him to leave. You cling to him, legs around his torso and arms around his neck. He still gets up, doing stuff as usual while you just hang there. He walks out the door, and you're still in your sleeping wear. "Chris, take me inside again, I'm not going out like this" "I was planning to take you to class"

And oh lord. The cuddles??? Heaven on earth. I'm a bit of a sucker for this, but big men laying on top of you sleeping? You can almost not breathe but he's so cute so you just leave him be, playing with his hair and scratching his back??? Yes please.

Anyways, you wanted filthy shit, I'll give it to you.

Let's be honest, he doesn't know his strength. Right when you walk in the door, you're slammed against it, losing your breath in the process, gasping for air. He doesn't let you, instead immediately start kissing you.

With great build comes BIG HANDS. And his veins? He's kinda insecure, but when he understands that you like his arms, he'll always find ways to show them off. Flexing his muscles and being like "Like what you see?"

Towering over you every time you make out. Having to stand on your tippy-toes to reach him, and he eventually gets sick of you being so far away so he just picks you up. Kneading your thighs and grinding against you while your back is pressed against the wall, legs clinging around his waist???

Fucking you roughly from behind with your hands forced down in the mattress, pressing his hands down on top of yours.

BOTH YOUR HANDS PINNED ABOVE YOU AS HE LIFTS YOUR LEG TO GET DEEPER INSIDE YOU

Fucking you roughly face to face, fingers intertwined but yours just drowning in his.

Basically caging you every way possible, no way out as he's too tall and too big arms around you. You look around, surprised this and he's like "Got you right where I want you"

Picking you up and throwing you EVERYWHERE. In the bed, on the sofa, against the wall, on the counter etc.

You're doing something, cooking for example, and he comes up behind you, feeling his big boner against your ass, leaning down his head to kiss your neck, arms around you and pressing you into him "Busy?" "Yes, Chris" "No, come get busy with me instead"

What a cutie pie

He drags you around like a ragdoll. If you're a little too high on the bed, takes hold of your ankles and drags your pussy right down to his mouth. A little low? He won't ask you to move, he just takes you and lifts you higher.

Fucking in the shower? Yes absolutely. Him sitting on his knees, begging to eat you out, and you run your fingers through his wet hair while the hot water runs down his body...

I truly hope people understand that at the end of the day, I am a completely normal person with just some random thoughts. Some...

[woso-dreamzzz]

Tattoos

Mapi Leon x Ingrid Engen x Child!Reader

Summary: You have pens

"Sorry," Mumma says as she bounces you on her hip," She's in a grumpy mood today."

You grunt, angling your head away as Tia Patri tries to rub at your cheek.

"Very grumpy," Tia Patri notes before smiling at you anyway and waving you goodbye.

"Okay," Mumma says, readjusting her grip on you so you can tuck your head into the crook of her neck," There we go. I think someone needs a little nap."

"No," You whine," No nap...jus'...jus' you. Jus' Mumma."

"Okay," Mumma agrees," Just Mumma."

You've been out of whack ever since the flight over for the semifinal Champion's League match. Mapi's still returning from her knee injury so she's been dropped to the bench and continues her rehab even though she's on the squad list so Ingrid's kind of been solo parenting for a bit.

It's not that Mapi won't help but she very much can't do things like play rough with you like you enjoy or bounce you on her knee to calm you down.

Ingrid hasn't done that a lot since she started dating Mapi, who dived head-first into things like that in an attempt to win you over.

"Mamí too," You insist as you whine out a low note.

"Are you having big feelings?" Ingrid asks as she fishes out her phone to ask where Mapi is.

You nod tiredly against her, practically limp but still with enough energy to kick and snap your displeasure.

Ingrid wonders if it's a lack of stimulation. The plane ride had been long and you didn't have any of your usual things to keep you occupied.

Your story books had all been packed in the big suitcase (the last time Ingrid will ever trust Mapi to pack your bags) and your colouring book and felt tip pens had been deemed too messy for you to use on the flight. That coupled with your inability to stay asleep for more than twenty minutes, means that you're exhausted and bored.

It's a dangerous combination.

Ingrid shoots off a text to Mapi about the situation and walks the length of the hallway, quietly hushing you and allowing you to suck at her collar even though she knows that it's going to feel bad against her skin later on.

Mapi replies quickly, saying that she's in the canteen with Alexia.

"Mumma," You whine as Ingrid makes for the elevator," No go out! No want!"

"We're not going out," Ingrid assures you but the damage is already done because the exhaustion and the boredom finally catch up with you and you burst into a round of frustrated tears.

Ingrid bounces you more firmly as you babble and sob and whine all the way down. The staff sends her sympathetic looks, some of them having children themselves, and the rest of the team look equally distraught as you clearly feel when Ingrid (frazzled and stressed) bursts into the canteen.

Mapi's at the table in the corner, a packet of temporary tattoo pens by her side as she transfers a sketch from her book onto Alexia's arms.

Alexia's been talking about getting another tattoo and Mapi had drawn up designs easily.

She's animatedly talking about the one she's transferring to Alexia's arms interspersed with flicking through the book to show alternative ideas.

She stops immediately though as your cries echo through the room and Ingrid approaches.

"What happened?" She asks," What's wrong? Is she hurt? Sick? She had that tummy bug a few weeks ago. Is it back?"

"She's having some big feelings," Ingrid replies, sitting down next to Mapi," I think she just wants some company while working through them. Look, she's already calming down."

She's right.

Your gasping breaths are evening out again and the tears roll down your face mostly silently. With your Mumma and Mamí now together, you're happy to just sag against Mumma and allow Mamí's conversation with Tia Ale to wash over you.

You slowly reach out for the pink pen that's resting on the table. You pick it up. Mamí doesn't use the pink a lot, especially when she's drawing ideas on people like she's doing with your Tia.

Mumma leans with you as you angle yourself towards Mamí's arms where some of her tattoos are on show.

"Open," You tell Mumma, your voice a little scratchy from all your crying and general unease. Mumma takes the lid off for you.

You press the tip against Mamí's arm, taking a lot of care to colour in the lines of the pictures she's got there.

She stops drawing on your Tia when she first feels the press of the nib against her skin.

You give her a little teary eyed smile when she catches your eye.

"Following in your footsteps," Mumma says fondly, finally able to plait your hair into a neat braid," Little tattoo artist."

"Yeah," Mamí agrees, moving to uncap all the pens on the table," Make sure to get in as many colours as possible, alright?"

You nod.

Mamí continues to draw on Tia Ale as you continue to colour in her tattoos.

The repetitive action soothes you and you make pretty swirls in her arm pictures even after she's finished showing Tia Ale her designs.

"Finished?" She asks.

You nod. "Finished."

"Ingrid," Mamí says," Take a picture of this." She flexes her arm. "I want to brag to everyone about how much more exciting she's made my arm."

[elceewunjo]

Hope over Power - Chapter 7

This one is actually one of the first bits I wrote a looong time ago, When playing as Astarion Origin run, you get a scene where his scars hurt at the beginning of Act II and it's just so lonely, I couldn't take it. I had to add some comfort, even if he's somewhat unwilling to receive it at this point. Anyways, yeah, that's what's happening here.

Kindness is a hateful thing Read on AO3 or under the cut (cause it can be read as standalone)

In which Astarion is having a terrible time. Sorry 🩶(but with friends, yay!) There's some comfort happening, but none of it is very healthy, this is Astarion we're talking about haha

Fic summary : The battle is won, the Netherbrain defeated, and Astarion is free. But as he returns to the shadows, someone fails to follow him. His lover, child of Bhaal, condemned to madness by his own father, God of Murder. For weakness, for disobedience, it matters not, Storm is lost. Astarion navigates his grief with the help of Tav, and fights for closure. POV : Astarion Relationships : Astarion x m!FailedDarkUrge (Storm), Astarion & gn!Tav TW for this chapter : mentions of torture, blood, nightmares

<prev First chapter (AO3 link)

Cheers ! 🩶

His scars were hurting. Fiercely.

Of course the devil had deemed necessary to unearth unpleasant memories before half agreeing to a deal. A deal of which Astarion didn't even know the cost, yet. The memory of his revealed torso, plain for everyone in Last Light to see without his say so made his skin crawl. Maybe Tav had been right to warn him about dealing with Raphael, but it was too late for regrets.

It wasn't the first time this pain came for him before he even found his trance, but it was definitely the worst in a long while. It felt like he was being carved open once more.

Hold still, boy.

He'd been told not to move, back then. But without the compulsion coming with the words, the order had been impossible to follow. Which had been the point, naturally.

He removed his shirt to avoid the friction of the fabric on his sensitive skin, but it didn't help much, and the motion set his nerves ablaze. He gritted his teeth against the pain, trying to stay silent, and curled up on his bedroll. Since that night nearly two hundred years ago when Cazador had sliced his flesh so deeply it had left scars, lying on his side instead of his back had become a habit, even when he wasn't in pain.

A rustle of cloth was the only warning he got before Storm's voice came from outside his tent.

"Astarion? Can I come in?"

Hells. He was usually the one seeking Storm's company, making good on his investment. But it seemed Storm was now comfortable enough to take the lead. Which could have been good. On any other night.

What could he do? There was no way he would be able to pleasure Storm tonight. Maybe he could pretend to be tired and let the tiefling do all the work, but the mere thought of lying on his back sent jolts of pain through him. Cazador's voice kept taunting him from a corner of his mind.

Don't move child. You're only bringing more pain onto yourself.

"Go away." His voice broke. He wasn't sure exactly who he directed the words at, but Storm wasn't having it.

"Are you alright?" Astarion could almost hear the frown in Storm's voice. But then again, the man was brooding most of the time, frowning was his natural state.

"Yes," he growled. "Just… please, go."

He could make up for it later. Better for him if Storm thought he was angry than for his lover to see him like this. He'd just have to find an excuse.

Storm came in.

Hells take this man. He and Tav were the same. Busybodies, the both of them. No wonder they got along so well. Astarion propped himself up on one elbow and turned to glower at the tiefling but moving sent the pain flaring like white-hot iron against his skin.

Stay. Put. Every muscle you move will add an hour to this.

Astarion heard Storm catch his breath, and shame crawled under every inch of his skin. He could only watch as his lover knelt in front of him and stated the obvious. "You're in pain."

Astarion went for a snarky retort, but choked on the words. Black spots were dancing at the edges of his vision.

"How do I help you?"

"I. Told you. To go."

"Darling… I can fetch Shadowheart for you. Or Halsin."

"No," he hissed. He didn't need a healer. A healer couldn't fight against his invading memories.

Storm sighed. "Tav, then. Tav will know what to do."

Before Astarion could protest further, Storm was already up and leaving. He groaned and forced himself to sit upright. Tav would not find him curled up in the dirt like an animal. There was only so much humiliation he was willing to suffer. Each motion sent jolts of agony through his back. By the time Storm returned with Tav in tow, Astarion's entire body was trembling, but he was on his knees, and had at least managed to summon a semblance of dignity. He hoped.

This tent really wasn't made for three people. Already, when Storm visited his bed, they were struggling for space, but with Tav now standing next to the tiefling, the lack of comfort was apparent. The fact that Astarion never tidied the place didn't help. Empty bottles of blood littered the floor, stained rags were rumpled hastily in a corner, and his daggers and armour lay messily on top of the one chest he'd managed to grab somewhere along their journey. The candles lighting the place were without a doubt a fire hazard. He should take better care of his living quarters, really. Storm never seemed to mind the mess, but seeing Tav standing there wrapped in layers of rich clothing, perfectly put together even this late at night, made him feel like a beggar.

Both Tav and Storm knelt in front of him in the cluttered space. He braced for the pity, or worse, the disgust in their eyes. But he found only worry on Storm's face, and something he could not place in Tav's gaze. Calm. Almost comforting. They had a small vial in one hand, halfway filled with what looked like oil of some kind.

"Halsin gave this to me—"

Astarion snapped his head towards Storm. "I said—"

"…A few weeks ago." Tav kept their eyes level with him, looking at him with this strange kind of intensity he couldn't place. "I asked this for myself, Astarion. Halsin knows nothing of this. But if you let me, I can help. It will numb everything."

He scoffed. "Drugs? Really?"

Tav smiled, almost devilishly. "Are you objecting, your honour?"

A smile and an exchange of barbs wasn't what he had expected, but it was infinitely better than fussing or pitying. Even if he had cared, he didn't know what the current state of the law regarding drugs in Baldur's Gate was. And they were far from the city anyway. He shrugged, and immediately regretted it as a stabbing pain in his back made him double over.

Will you hold still? The more you disobey, the longer you will suffer.

"Shut. Up." The words spat through gritted teeth weren't for Tav, but they cocked their head at him all the same, jewellery casting motes of light across the tent with the motion. "Not you. I— This isn't your problem, Tav. You should go."

"I will. If that's really what you want. But this happens to me, sometimes, so I do know what to do. You may think this isn't going to work because the pain isn't real. But your body thinks it is." Tav sighed, trying to make eye contact with him. "Let me help you. Please."

He met their eyes. Understanding. That's what he hadn't been able to read before in Tav's pink gaze. He hated it. He hated it so much.

He'd always liked to think that he was proud, but times and times again his pride had melted under the blows like snow in summer, and he'd begged and pleaded like the weakling Cazador oh so liked to remind him that he was. Once again, pain defeated him, and he nodded in resignation. But his surrender wasn't met by cruel laughter, or more pain, or months of forced solitude and starvation.

Only the same kindness that he had spent hours sneering at in the couple of months travelling side by side with Tav.

He hated it.

He wondered briefly what they'd meant when they'd said it happened to them. He hadn't seen a single scar on them before. But then again, most people in camp hadn't seen his, which was the whole reason the memories were so vivid now. What's that about scars, fangs? I thought your skin was flawless. Sweet Karlach. Who wore her own scars like badges of honour. Proudly. Astarion had also thought Tav's skin to be flawless, but apparently he'd been wrong.

The curiosity was smothered by a visceral fear as Tav moved swiftly at his back, every instinct in him screaming against the danger of being in such a vulnerable position with no means of escape. Kindness was the hateful thing you gave people right before you broke them, after all, why shouldn't he be afraid? But this was different. Astarion had been working hard to make sure Tav would be on his side. He forced himself to hold still. Storm shuffled closer to him. Yes, brooding. Astarion had been right about that. But even then, the concern in his lover's face was unmistakable. That man.

"I'm gonna have to touch you, love," came Tav's voice from behind him.

He braced himself, but nothing came. It took him a painful minute before realising Tav was waiting for him to agree to it. He nodded again, wordlessly. And stifled a cry when Tav's hands met his bare shoulders, their skin so warm against his that it was almost painful. He grabbed Storm's forearm reflexively. His nails dig into flesh, but Storm didn't pull away.

"What makes you happy?" asked Tav from behind his back. "Think about that, if you can. It'll help."

He would have laughed at the absurdity of the request if he'd not feared the agony that motion would bring. What made him happy? What had ever made him happy? He didn't know.

Tav worked their way down his back slowly, first going around the scars to avoid the painful spots. They were humming gently, half formed words in a foreign tongue. Some kind of lullaby, as if he were a child. He couldn't even bring himself to be angry at that, his thoughts consumed by the pain, the memory of a knife digging deep, of a cold unyielding hand holding his neck down as the other one carved his back.

The salve from Halsin was some kind of oil that he was pretty sure would have felt warm even without Tav's touch. Their hands left trails of heat on his skin, not quite enough to dull the pain yet, and he let his forehead drop on Storm's shoulder, gritting his teeth against a whimper. Storm buried his free hand in Astarion's curls, stroking his scalp gently. So close to his neck, the smell of Storm's blood was overwhelming.

What made him happy?

The feelings this blood brought to him certainly came close. And then there had been the few times where pleasure had found him, unexpectedly, during his nightly escapades with Storm. It had been happening more and more often, lately. That could count, maybe. Waking up in a warm embrace also wasn't bad, if he chased the immediate panic that beset him at being trapped, before Astarion remembered that it was Storm that held him, and that he had chosen this.

Tav dug the soft of their thumbs in his back, finally going over the writing on his back. He'd been afraid their fingers would follow the memory of the knife, but they kept the patterns of their touch regular, not trailing the circles he now knew were there. He gasped every time their hands passed over the most painful spots, the heat consuming the ache as they went. Storm squeezed his arm. "Is this good or bad, darling?"

Tav paused, and he groaned in protest before he could stop himself. "Don't stop."

"You're doing great, love." He could hear the smile in Tav's voice and itched to erase it. They were being smug on purpose, he just knew it.

But the anger wasn't there, not really. Just the echo of a reflex. The shame had left him, too. Even the fear was gone. Pain left nothing but exhaustion in its wake, and he leaned almost all his weight on Storm. Tav kept working, the warmth of their hands comfortable now, and spreading from their fingertips in waves. He couldn't remember a time where he'd felt such peace.

He fought against sleep. He didn't usually let himself go further than a light trance. The memories visiting during meditation were bad, but he'd learned with time that the dreams that came with sleep were often worse. He closed his eyes, but hung on to consciousness as Tav's hands warmed his cold skin, Storm stroking his hair.

A lone corner of his mind wondered if this was what it felt like to have his plan work out the way he'd wanted to. Tav had always been his target, Storm being the collateral damage, the necessary path, and neither of them even knew about it. Sometimes, he thought Tav had seen through him, but they never said a word, and since Storm was still by his side blissfully unaware, he was probably just being paranoid. Tav was here, and they had his back. Exactly as he'd intended. The tiniest needle of guilt pierced through his numb tranquillity, and he pushed it away forcefully. He'd done what he had to do.

"I think he's sleeping." Storm's voice was distant, and Astarion didn't have the energy to protest that he was not, in fact, asleep. He followed Storm's motion without even opening his eyes when the tiefling lay him down, Tav's hands pulling back. The warmth was still there though. And the peace. Such peace. The pain was gone. His memories banished. Storm's fingers gently retreated from his hair, and Astarion just lay there, close to slumber, still fighting against it. He was losing the battle rapidly.

"Everything alright with you two?"

He wasn't certain if he had imagined Tav's voice, but he could feel Storm shift next to him. "I'm not sure 'us two' are much of anything at all."

"Hm. I think you'd be surprised by the way he looks at you when your back is turned. Maybe even he would be surprised by it."

Astarion would have chuckled at that if he hadn't been floating in a dark heavy space somewhere between sleep and consciousness. He was very aware that Storm hadn't felt like a target to him for a little while now. He hated it. He was such an idiot. Weak. Falling at the first show of kindness. He had tried ignoring what he felt, and found that he couldn't. That Tav had seen it too was unsurprising, but made him deeply uncomfortable. What was he supposed to do about it, if they knew? Tell the truth? Humiliate himself? He couldn't.

He had to.

"Storm…" Tav sounded unsure. "I care for him, you know I do. But… I don't know. So many things are complicated for you right now. And for him too, I'm pretty sure. I—" A sigh came. Astarion wasn't quite sure from whom. "I have no idea what to do to make sure neither of you gets hurt by this."

"Respectfully, Tav, this isn't your problem. He and I can figure it out."

"I… Yeah, you're right. I know. I'm sorry."

"There are a lot of things that are wrong in my life right now, it's true. But he isn't one of them."

Yes, his plan had worked. And he'd caught not one, but two people in his snare. Two people that, he was fairly certain by now, would fight for his safety as fiercely as for their own. If he told them the truth of what he'd done, he'd risk losing that. Could he afford it? He had to. He wanted to. Maybe just… not now. Not yet.

He finally let sleep claim him, deeper than the trance he usually preferred, Storm still by his side.

------------------------------------------------------------

He found himself in a comfortable bed with silken bed sheets, Storm's tail wrapped around one of his legs just as it usually was whenever he awoke at his lover's side. He knew something was wrong immediately. Someone that shouldn't be there was there.

And Astarion couldn't move.

His mind raced. He and Storm hadn't gone to rest in a silken bed, had they? He tried looking around the room to orient himself, but he couldn't even shift his head. His eyes could only focus on Storm's face, the tiefling peacefully asleep, dark grey skin almost blending in with the darkness of the room.

His mouth refused to cooperate when his first instinct was to warn Storm.

There was someone in the room with them, and Astarion could not move.

Then a voice, all too familiar, rose form the darkness. "You are mine, boy. Never forget that."

No. No, no, no, no. Astarion tried once more to move, desperation growing in him. A finger, a toe, and eyelash, anything would have been a victory in this instant. But not an inch of his body yielded. He knew this bed. He had never rested in it before. And yet there he laid, in Cazador's pleasure chambers, and Storm was about to be taken away after all.

A shadow loomed over the bed, Storm entirely oblivious to the threat. A low whine escaped Astarion's paralysed throat as Cazador bent over his lover, dark red eyes gleaming in the darkness.

"You are mine. Everything you have is mine. Did you think you could escape me, child?"

One spindly hand stroked Storm's long dark hair, possessively. Astarion wanted to shut his eyes, but he knew full well he would not be granted even this small mercy. At least Storm still slept. Perhaps his death would be silent, and his screams wouldn't haunt Astarion.

But when Cazador bit down violently, Storm's eyes shot open, the electric blue of his irises barely visible around the deep animal fear dilating his pupil. Blood spilled on the bed from the wound as Astarion's master drank, and Storm did scream, then. Blood rushed from his mouth too, drowning the sound. Red crimson soaked the sheets, but it wasn't warm, not like the blood Storm usually shared with him. No. Everything here was cold, and the ice settled in Astarion's chest. Life was escaping his lover's eyes.

And still, he could not move.

He watched as Cazador drained his lover, the source of all his recent warmth, and did nothing. When his master was finished, Storm's body lay limp on the ruined silk. The monster above him grinned, licked its fangs, and spoke as if it were a person.

"You are mine," it said once more. "You will always be mine."

Familiar hatred simmered in Astarion's chest as he kept struggling to move.

"He is not yours," Cazador said. "I did not give him to you, and so he can never be yours. Mine, boy. You are mine."

Something on the back of Astarion's throat unlocked, finally. "No," he growled.

This wasn't real, he realised. This wasn't real.

------------------------------------------------------------

He jerked awake in the darkness of the Shadow Curse, and only the immediate sound of Storm's deep breathing kept the panic at bay. It hadn't been real. Of course it hadn't.

He should know better than to lose a fight against sleep. He was an elf, and he didn't need sleep. He was a fool.

He moved every part of his body that he could move without waking his lover —that excluded only his right leg, Storm's tail wrapped there just as it had been in the dream. Astarion tried to settle for stillness, but the memory of paralysis had made him restless. He watched his lover sleep like he never had before, focusing on the heartbeat he could see beating in Storm's neck. Alive.

Many of his dreams left his skin crawling, but this one made him starve for warmth. He trailed his fingers along the pulse on Storm's wrist, desperate for the life there. His lover was breathing deeply, but Astarion needed better proof than that.

Storm's eyes fluttered open at the touch, no trace of fear or pain there. "Hey," he said, voice husky with sleep. "How are you feeling?"

It couldn't have been more than a few hours, Astarion should have left the man sleep. But he was nothing if not selfish. "Better," he said. He didn't have the strength for more.

"I'm glad."

He kissed Storm, then, and did not bother with the pretence of sweetness. He trailed his tongue along his lover's lips hungrily, slid his hands under Storm's shirt and went directly for the nipples, playing with the piercings there until Storm gasped and tensed next to him. He bit the lips that answered his kiss, almost drawing blood.

Storm chuckled. "Do you want blood, or do you want sex?"

The question was genuine, Astarion realised. But he wasn't sure he wanted either of those things, right now. He closed his eyes, and Storm's blood rushed out of a wounded neck, in his mind's eye. Definitely not the blood, then, not tonight. "Just the sex."

He didn't feel lust. He hadn't in a long time. But he did feel a raw need for Storm's warm skin against his, for the confirmation of life, for something that would empty his mind, and this was the only way he knew how. And indeed, when Storm's muffled cries came in pleasure instead of pain moments later, Astarion's mind was far away, and quiet. The tension left his body, if only because he was not here to feel it.

Mine, he thought greedily when he distantly felt Storm go over the edge. Pleasure did not come, not for him, but that had not been the point. And when Storm asked to stay and sleep the rest of the night with him, he said yes without even thinking twice about it.

"I'm sorry," whispered Storm, later.

Astarion forcefully brought his attention to the present. "Whatever for, darling?"

"You told me to go. And I brought Tav instead."

"Mh. Yes. Always sticking your noses where it doesn't belong, the lot of you."

"Forgive me. It won't happen again."

Storm fell asleep mere minutes later, and Astarion watched him, settling for a few more hours of trance. Storm was no longer touching him. But Astarion still felt warm. Something violent and wild and sweet was growing inside of him, and he was powerless to stop it.

He wasn't even sure he wanted to, anymore.

[satureja13]

Next day, the Boys and Rubyn were busy until noon, but then - finally - the setup was complete. Including a brand new high range parabolic antenna, sitting on top of the highest tower of Mos Verdantis. Rubyn started the scan, this would take a few hours. They have no idea where Tiny Can might have fled to, so all worlds needed to be scanned. But after that, they will have a crystal clear signal of the little piece of junk. Sai can't wait to dismantle him and stomp his filthy circuit board into the ground...

The Boys thought they could help Rubyn around her workshop and house in the meantime, to keep the costs low. And Jack told Sai he and Kiyoshi would make a short trip to the Magical Realm to catch a fish for the Grim Reaper. Since Future Jeb's weird message, Sai is always worried to separate them: "Alone? What about helping us here? And how will you get there anyway?" Jack: "Don't worry, Kiyoshi is still Kojin's demon, he will take me there. I really think we should do these favours for Grim. I'd like to rely on his help should you really kill me ^^'" Sai: "You heard that, huh?"

Jack: "I'm a werewolf, I can hear everything, Mr. 'I want you so bad, Jeb' hahaha!" Sai: "RUN!" Jack: "Now, Kiyoshi!"

Sai yelled after him that he's gonna be the one who will hang in that net instead of that poor droid! But Jack just laughed. Sai will have already forgotten about it when they come back.

And then they were gone. How embarrassing. Sai had no idea what had come over him last night. Even though he knew his friends were in the tents next to them, he wasn't able to stop throwing himself in Jeb's muscular arms... Saying stupid things.

Kiyoshi and Jack landed just in view of the tree where Kiyoshi had spend 6 decades. Reflecting - and longing for Jack. Jack thought that might be a bit much for him: "Will you be ok?" Kiyoshi: "I will. In hindsight it brought us back together again. That wouldn't have worked out if we hadn't both grown, hm?" Jack hummed his agreement and they angled in silence.

They finished their quests quickly and returned back to the others to help them. But time passes faster in the Magical Realm. And just as only a few months had passed in the mundane worlds while Kiyoshi sat 60 years under/inside that tree, already a few hours had passed in Oasis Springs until Jack and Kiyoshi returned with their new rewards.

Just in time for dinner! Perfect!

And just when they were finished doing the dishes and cleaned up, the signal came in! Rubyn looked at the interactive map. An uneasy frown on her face. Sai: "What? Is it far?" Rubyn: "Eh, no. In fact just the contrary. The last signal from Tiny Can comes from here - Oasis Springs..." Sai already turned around to head for the exit: "But that's good, isn't it? Let's go!"

Rubyn stopped him: "Wait! It would have been good if it weren't that place. One does not simply go there." Sai: "What's wrong with... eh - that place?" Rubyn buried her face in her hands and sighed: "A few years ago, I was still unexperienced in servo constuction, I happened to create a - uhm... monster. RoDri6ue2-B was striving for world domination and tried to bring his minions among my neighbors. I stopped him and send him to the Moisture Farm nearby, as a punishment. I thought the hard work would, kind of, purify him. But he's still up to no good. The last signal from Tiny Can comes from this farm, and it's old." Sai: "Argh, we wasted too much time! I knew it!" Rubyn: "No, much older. We're talking months. It must have been sent shortly after you left home and went beyond the Veil to study. There is no newer signal of Tiny Can across all the worlds - and I'm not sure what that means. Did RoDri6ue2-B destroy Tiny Can already? Or did he supress his signals and made him his servant? Anyhow, we can't just walk over and ask about Tiny Can's whereabouts. And RoDri6ue2-B shouldn't see any of you either. He might take you prisioners and sell you to the Council, or worse!"

It took Sai and the others a while to comprehend - and they still wondered what exactly happened after they left broken Tiny Can. Sai: "That's so weird. How had he been able to repair himself and steal that money in such a short amount of time?!" Rubyn: "I have no idea. But I will sneak over there tonight and find out. Alone."

'Well, if you told me you were drowning, I would not lend a hand I've seen your face before, my friend, but I don't know if you know who I am Well, I was there and I saw what you did, I saw it with my own two eyes So you can wipe off that grin, I know where you've been It's all been a pack of lies'

In the Air tonight - Phil Collins

From the Beginning 🔱 Underwater Love 🔱 Latest

Current Chapter: starts ▶️ here Last Chapter: 'Here comes the Sun' from the beginning ▶️ here

📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 23-28

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #523 (Part 2)

Right! So, we went to Eggcellent! For a change of pace, I got a passionfruit jasmine tea. And J got a taro milk latte, with extra taro, and a strawberry croffle:

...And then we went home. I thought the sky, after it had cleared up a little, looked a lot like you today, so I snapped a few pictures:

J had his job shortly after that, so I mostly just sat on my computer and wrote. I put something I had chronicled a while ago into a different (and perhaps better?) format.

...No, I'm not going to put it here. It describes a thing that happened to me, and it's close to my heart, and... I don't really want people to read it and make fun of it. Maybe ask me about it later; I'd let you, specifically, see it. But I don't wanna just stick it willy-nilly on the internet where it'll surely be misunderstood.

I will put the wishes I breathed to life for you today in here, though! Check 'em out!

...You know. I think that the one made of rainbow-colored paper turned out to look especially like you. Since it has that rainbow-colored wing only on its right side.

...If the version of you with a wing is actually you (which... I'm not entirely sure it is, since like... supposedly you don't degrade...), then you'll never convince me that your wing is black. No, I think... I think we're just not able to see it properly with our eyes that can't catch UV light. Like crow's wings or grackle's wings... I imagine the true color of them is rainbow iridescence.

Anyway, J and I were able to play Valheim together after his shift ended. It was the first time in a while that we had done that in a way that resulted in any kind of progress; last time, we were trying to find Swamp biomes, and the game seemed to be taunting us by giving us these teeny-tiny little slivers of Swamp with absolutely fucking nothing in them.

But today!! As we explored in my GIANT FUCKING BOAT (hell yeah!!), we came across an island that was made ENTIRELY out of swamp! Check out the map in the upper right corner!

We came away from it with SO MUCH MORE IRON than I would have been able to gather on my own! Which J promptly used in order to upgrade from bronze weapons to copper!

...We'll need to get more; we still need to upgrade our iron gear, and the only way to do that is to get more iron. We still have a ways to go before we'll be ready to face Bonemass. And anyways, we still need to find a crypt with a rune that will tell us where Bonemass even is. But we're not done clearing out this crypt yet, and we still have quite a bit of swamp to explore on this island; I'm feeling pretty hopeful.

For now, though... I gotta go to bed. My brain is pretty soupy, actually, and it's late and I still gotta wash my CPAP and brush my teeth and stick 'em back in their cages (an Invisalign reference, hahaha...).

I love you so much and I hope you feel it in your bones. And... even if my world doesn't feel like home to you yet, I hope at very least that these letters feel like home to you; it's kinda why I write them.

Please stay safe. I'll write again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

[another-lost-mc]

OH MY GOD JES YOURE BACK 😭💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

⤷ me crawling out of an unofficial hiatus because OM's twitter posted that damn teaser pic of Karasu holding a ring

I do feel bad for not being online much lately. To the anons that have left messages like these for me, I appreciate you and I'm sorry I wasn't in the headspace to reply as quickly as I would've liked. 😭

Nightbringer's story ending felt like a good time to take a break from things for a while. I haven't been consistently active on Tumblr lately for a lot of reasons, but the OM franchise shifting into neutral was part of it. I've been keeping busy with other things:

Work. Work is good but it is also evil. Last year I accepted a promotion so I went from working less and having lots of spare time to working too much and having no spare time. It's only in the past month that I've managed to correct my work/life balance to something more sustainable. (Related to this, I've been dealing with long-term flare-ups of my chronic illness and lacking spoons for socializing which meant I wasn't spending much time on my computer even if I had free time. Thankfully, this is also improving now which is great 'cause it sounds like Solmare is up to nonsense again.)

Playing other games. I'll admit that I haven't logged onto either OM app in ages. I've mostly been playing Twisted Wonderland and HSR these days. I'm so thrilled that I got Crowley's SSR and I'm excited for Crewel's upcoming release. I tried to get into LADS but it just wasn't for me, although I still play it very casually sometimes. I still play WHB casually too, because the characters are so so so hot even if the EN translation is a bit wonky.

Catching up on other hobbies. So much anime and manga lol. I rewatched Demon Slayer and I've been watching Haikyuu!! and Delicious in Dungeon. New selfships and otp ships galore. I've been deep-diving into my ao3 bookmarks and re-reading some of my favourite ship fics too. Oh, and I've been reading a lot of BL manga/manhwa and buying copies for my home library.

R&R: So many naps! So much relaxing on the couch with the kitties and a book and cup of tea. I don't normally like going on trips so staycations are my go-to. The last one was a few months ago when we went to Toronto for a concert and stayed overnight to make the most of it. We didn't go away for Victoria Day, but we're going to the cottage next weekend instead. It should be fun.

Even with all that going on, things keep circling back to Obey Me when I get the urge to write something. I've been revisiting old drafts of things I was working on before. A while ago I bought the Barbatos Makeship plushie and the Karasu/RAD pin set, a rare splurge since buying physical merch is a pain. I haven't been buying as much online these days with all the trade nonsense going on.

Oh, and let's not forget the OCs. I have some new OC art commissions to add to their official galleries too. I swear, if you ever worry about losing your love for OM, just make an OC. Come up with a design and interesting backstory and headcanons for them, and you'll be set. Mine have been rotating in my brain like rotisserie chickens this entire time so even when I'm not writing or talking about them online, part of me is still thinking about the OM world and the OCs and how they fit into it. I also have a backlog of OC-related asks I'd like to catch up on at some point; it's time to make the OC brain rot everyone's problem and not just mine. lol

Anyway, that's what I've been up to these days. 🥹