#avoiding self-reflection core ❤️

[a-man-in-the-crowd]

yk the fact will is kind've monty's conscience and his whole thing being that no one notices him is probably symbolic of sumn

[dancingwithfoxes]

🍁 Merry Mabon! 🍁

below are some messages from gods/goddesses I felt called to share. ❤️🦊 I hope that at any point you find these messages, they are able to help you wherever necessary and give you the strength to be yourself wholly.

Baldur

“To control your emotions does not mean to avoid them we have to seek solace in the hard feelings we face and conquer. ”

foxglove • you may feel as though you do not recognise yourself anymore, or the path you've been taking feels very unfamiliar. Take some time to tether back to your inner self. This season is a moment to reflect on the ways you've changed and grown.

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

Bragi

“I've sat with my anger long enough to know its the calling of inner grief.”

henbane • it's believed that some used to crown the passed on with chaplets of henbane, helping them to forget their previous lives so they could move forward without regrets. Something is holding you back from moving on — it's time to forgive and move forward to find your freedom.

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Eir

“We cannot simply sit and stare at the wounds we carry.”

thistle • known for being spiky and unwelcoming. However, they provide as a valuable component toward birds and pollinators. Thistles represent true fulfilment. You have so much to give, and the world around you is ready to give back. Whoever has entered or been a core part of your life is here to provide and remind you of the goodness within the world. You are not alone.

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

Ēostre

“Allow yourself to shine without the desire to be seen.”

chickweed • these are known as early-flowering herbs which appear when the rest of the world is still cold and bare. They are full of valuable nutrients and are proof of things returning to life. A series of blessings will make their way to you, they may appear quite modest and miniscule however, they hold much more meaning. You deserve it.

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Freyja

“There are poems inside of you that even paper can't handle.”

mandrake • whether they are used in magical or medicinal ways, mandrakes have been valued for thousands of years by those who grow it. However it takes three years to reach its full potency. Do not judge yourself by the speed at which others grow; you need more time to reach your full potential and there is no shame in that.

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Freyr

“Be patient when becoming someone you have never been before, it will take time to be comfortable in new shoes.”

crocus • speaking up for yourself may just be one of the hardest things to do, particularly if you've ever felt your opinion is not worth being heard. Being assertive does not mean coming across as aggressive; you're simply letting people know what your needs are. Allow yourself the chance to speak up. Something is weighing on you heavily that needs to be talked about.

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Frigg

“Self love is the highest frequency that attracts everything you desire.”

basil • there is growth to be found in helping others achieve the same goal. A leaf of holy basil is placed on the forehead of the deceased to allow them to be seen. By giving your time and energy to others, you will draw the same good energy that you were giving away towards yourself. Remember, what you give is what you will receive.

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Hel

“Please let go of the illusion that it could have been any different to how it played out.”

crocus • feelings not heard are feelings that shall linger much longer than necessary at times. Being honest and vocal about how you feel does not mean you are in any way selfish. Allow yourself the chance to speak up, hearts really are something to be cared for, by expressing hurt emotions we are releasing that weight even just a little.

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

Iðunn

“The truth is these scars are the living proof I was strong enough to make a change.”

the sickle • the sickle is not only a symbol of gathering harvest but also a sign of reaching the aftermath of a long and fruitful year. The challenges that you have faced are nearing their end, its time to reflect back on what has passed, both good and bad. Take those lessons and apply them to any obstacle you should find yourself faced with. This is also a reminder of the seasons being ever changing, a new season awaits.

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

Jörð

“Just because you are soft does not mean you are not a force. Honey and wildfires are both the colour of gold.”

citrus • common knowledge states citrus fruits are packed full of protective powers. You've been struck with a number of situations that you feel may be out of your control - but through the circumstances that caused them might be, the way you choose to handle them is not. You have the strength to govern how they come to affect you. Some battles can be won and some are best left alone; listen to your intuition, you already know what to do.

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Loki

“Understand we cannot save everyone, you can only love them. You cannot transform for them, you can only hold onto and console when they are faced with the unknown parts of themselves.”

birch • the birch tree is beloved by many for its pure but determined energy. It is one of the first trees to grow leaves in the season of spring. Its also the first to grow back in an area which woodland is cleared; this tenacity is a symbol of strength to overcome hardships. They also represent a time of rebirth. This season brings a new chapter after realising and coming to terms with a situation. Don't let past difficulties make you jaded, enter this phase with confidence.

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

Máni

“Healing also means taking an honest look at the role you play in your own suffering.”

asphodel • in Corsica, where asphodel grows, a person who has been gone from their homeland for a long period of time is said to have 'forgotten the asphodel'. You may be feeling heavy nostalgia toward something that has long come to pass — could be an old friend, a place, or somewhere you found great solace in being. Reaching out to that friend or recreating that time or place is what you need right now, why are you holding back?

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Óðinn

“Allow the road ahead of you to speak louder than the one you're leaving behind.”

apple • everything has an ending. Whether it be today or a hundred years from now, nothing can truly stay as it is, and it's not always a bad thing. We naturally shy away from death or change, but don't forget that it too is in nature's plan. Something in your life needs closure, come to terms with it, embrace it and know that in its ending, something new and beautiful will soon emerge and find its way to you.

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Sif

“Being there for others does not mean you get to leave yourself behind.”

aconite • you're facing a difficult or painful decision with no 'right' answer available yet. However in your heart of hearts, you already know what you need to do. Please don't agonise over it much longer than you have to. Named for the hills on which Hercules fought Cerberus, aconite promises there is relief to be had after the brief and challenging fallout of your decision. Know this won't last forever and is momentary.

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Sigyn

“To bring in more abundance we sometimes have to pause and take a minute to appreciate the gifts we are already fortunate to have.”

foxglove • you may feel as though you havent had much fortune or good find you lately. It can be harder to appreciate the good when things feel a little stagnant and calm. There is peace in not having chaos. Acknowledge and reflect on the little things that speak louder, such as a warm cup of tea after a long day, an outpour of rain on a random Wednesday.

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Sjöfn

“People tend to heal and grow the most when they are loved well.”

moonwart • these ferns have many magical properties ascribed to them, but one of the most prominent is their ability to undo or destroy any lock. Our minds are skilled at hiding away old griefs, unwanted feelings and stressful memories. In the long term these will become dangerous but now is the time to make sense of them. Take the opportunity to unlock those hidden spaces and clear out the cobwebs.

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Skaði

“Indulge in the coming of solitude, and find your peace within the season of silence.”

blackthorn • Cailleach is the guardian of an ancient woodlands, she stands in the woods, back bent, raven on her shoulder and holding a staff of blackthorn. People may underestimate you, but you know your true power the lurks within. Don't let other people's opinions take away your confidence in your own magic.

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Thor

“This too shall pass, the hard feelings you hold onto, the ones you fear being unearthed. I just need you to trust in me.”

rose • hanging a rose from a ceiling, a tradition which indicates that any conversation which takes place in its presence must be kept in confidence. Its time to finally open up and talk of what's been gnawing at you. Choose your confidant carefully, it may also be something they've been wanting to talk about. Your relationship can only grow stronger through the act of trusting each other.

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Týr

“I've learned that in order to receive the good things, you need to believe you are deserving of them.”

tulip • there is a Persian tale which tells of a laborer who fell absolutely in love with a princess. To deter this person from pursuing the princess, the king set an impossible task; but upon seeing the person near to completing it, the king told them the princess had passed on. When he to passed, tulips began to grow from him. The moral being, don't let the lies and deceit of others deter you from achieving what you aim for. Don't be fooled by falsehoods that will keep you from greatness. You deserve good things, you are a good person.

[nightcolorz]

For the ask game: ❤️💚💙

YAYY thank u sm for the ask! these questions r so fun. I’m going off of the book fandom btw

❤: Which character do you think is the most egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom?

Louis <3 I think this is an affect of how likable and overtly sympathetic he is in the amc show but I've seen people getting genuinely offended over Louis being described in fandom (and by Anne rice herself) as a manipulative cold hearted ass who uses his perceived vulnerability and gentleness to distract from the fact that he is just as cruel if not crueler then the other vampires. Like Louis does nottt have strong morals or high empathy lmao. Book Louis weaponizes his privilege like a white woman crying to self victimize into making the other vampires look worse them him 😭 . He refuses to kill humans for a while not bcus it hurts him to take life (he actually takes more pleasure in it then most), he refuses bcus he has catholic brain the way a christians who say "how do atheists have morals without god?" do, misunderstanding that most people actually care about other people and dont need an existential threat to encourage them not to hurt others.

His moral compass is self centered and based in up keeping the appearance of self restraint and monk style lack of enjoying himself, not empathy. If a vampire killed u would u feel better if u knew he cried over how much he got off on it then flaunted his suffering over how little he indulged so that everyone knew how piosis he was 😭.

He is way worse when it comes to how he treats his victims then Armand who intentionally seeks out victims who r asking to die or Lestat who tries the vigilante approach. Louis kills innocents and he thinks it makes him better cuz he only does it sometimes and he feels really really bad about himself afterwards. As akasha said (paraphrased) he's the most predatory of them all.

To specify I love book Louis SOOOO much I love how shitty he is that's why it makes me sad when people mischaracterize him as sincere and get gen mad when ppl characterize him how he is in canon (a lying selfish bitch bless his heart). Like ik amc Louis at this point in canon is unambiguously in the right but he isn't like an accurate reflection of how he is in the books 😭 it's not like amc did what anne rice was trying to do more successfully, they just nulled what anne rice was doing in favor of a more likable protagonist. Which is fine, but like, there's no crime in preferring evil to the core horrible asshole Louis of the books.

💚: What does everyone else get wrong about your favorite character?

I think the common fandom perception of Armand as the crazy unhinged "omg I can't believe he actually did that in the books??" sadistic maniac villain guy is funny but not really accurate. Armand explicitly not only tries to avoid violence but dislikes it and finds it hard to comprehend why someone would seek out violence and conflict.

The reason he is always doing fucked up shit isn't out of a lestat-esc desire to cause chaos, it's bcus his highly strung ptsd brain has him convinced that the world is a battle ground and he must always be defending himself and acting out in violence.

Since acting out in violence is a reaction hes been taught throughout his life to be standard and necessary, as violence is something so normalized to him he considers it more of a tedious chore then a last resort measure, he usually reacts to conflict in ways that are objectively extreme to anyone who isn't thinking from his perspective. In qotd he even asks Daniel why men choose to fight in wars, explaining that he doesn't understand the draw of violence (bcus he's not a man) and he can't comprehend the supposed thrill of it.

Then he says this in pl to Gregory

💙: Which character is not as hot as everyone else seems to think they are?

i was going to say Marius but I figure that's too obvious since everyone at this point knows I don't like Marius 😭 so here's an even hotter take,,,,, Lestat ‼️

Only to a degree, I think Lestat is hot and deserves the hype, but i also think he's hot in a different way then a chunk of the fandom does. Based on his book description he's kind of wonky looking, mouth too big for his face, vaguely unnerving shallow pale skin, starved 1700s peasant build but also kind of buff in the unhealthy "i dont eat regularly but I'm strong enough to carry a wolf for miles on my back" sense, weirdly small fucking feet. He def has creepy ass florescent blue doll eyes too. my point is I think when drooling over Lestat the fandom tends to forget this wonkiness in favor of blonde bombshell, Sam Reid chizzled jawline and abs, or conventionally beautiful anime twink, when they should be appreciating lestat in all his weird as shit glory.

[dadbodsandbots]

💋🫀 and 🍷 for a beloved that’s on your mind right now! 🫶💕

I haven't talked about Vlad in a while so let's go with him and my C.arnagesona :> 💋 — How does your F/O express their affection? How do you express yours?

Vlad's very reserved in public - no overt affection like kisses or the like. That said, he is fond of having a hand on mine or my arm where he can feel my pulse point (is a massive freak and dares anyone to say anything about us). He is highly selective with gifts, viewing them as a reflection of how much he acknowledges his partner's tastes and preferences while also demonstrating his resources - money talks but wealth whispers, etc etc. Gifts for me involve regional items evocative of my home: wisteria or jasmine-scented perfume, muscadine wine, and the most unusual being an actual box of soil from the exact county of my birth. To anyone out of the loop, it would appear as a cruel gag gift; the elaborate box being worth more than the red clay dirt within. Vlad is very aware of the power of texture, scent, and nostalgia, being emotionally and magically attached to his homeland by virtue of his condition. I'm not into PDA beyond holding his hand or arm, but am thrilled that Vlad respects my boundaries enough to tolerate my hot-and-cold demeanor. He finds my catlike behavior appropriate, endearing even, especially when I seek him out on slower evenings to relax in our shared spaces: reading, chatting, or simply enjoying each other's company in silence. I discover that he greatly appreciates hand-made gifts: items that take hours upon hours to complete, full of rich detail and symbolism. Vlad is pleasantly surprised that I enjoy textile arts and encourages me to embellish his clothing and accessories. He is genuinely touched by the extent I research and incorporate period-specific Wallachian embroidery techniques. At our cores, we are deeply homesick, sentimental people with an appreciation for history and culture, which is reflected in our love language.

❤️ — Tell us about a soft moment shared between you and your F/O! What made this moment so valuable to you?

The C.arnage symbiote is very physically and emotionally demanding; it's not uncommon for me to experience memory creep from C.letus K.asady's genetic memory which makes me prone to overworking myself into insomniac episodes to avoid letting my guard down. Vlad quickly adapts to the subtle signs that precede a crash, chiding me for not informing him earlier. He expects me to be self-sufficient as co-regent, although he sympathizes once he learns of the true extent I have held back the symbiote's urges to hunt and feed, mentally exhausting myself hour by hour, day by day, until the symptoms physically manifest. That amount of willpower on behalf of his people goes neither unnoticed nor unrewarded. He spends the day at my side, having informed his aides to administrate in his stead. In classic D.racula fashion, he ignores my protests and declares that he would be a poor leader and poorer spouse if he knowingly allowed my condition to further deteriorate. He trusts that I will regain control, just as I trust that he will not abuse my weakened state. He moves his casket to my room and shares his personal storeroom of blood to sate C.arnage's hunger until I'm able to comfortably sleep for the first time in weeks. It's the first of many olive branches exchanged over the years that helped me accept his personal investment in our arrangement beyond a simple political maneuver.

🍷 — It's date night! What do you and your F/O get up to? What makes it a night to remember?

Vlad is very fond of parties as an excuse to unwind and also mingle with his subjects around V.ampyrsk. Sure, it's also for surveillance purposes and to keep up appearances, but he enjoys knowing that his children of the night feel safe and connected with their leadership.

He is well aware that I'm on less than good terms with his constituents due to my previous predation of vampires for sustenance. Vampires across all hierarchies tolerate my presence at best, or at least refrain from openly gossiping when Vlad and his entourage are present, so the social isolation wears on me compared to my thriving social life at M.onster M.etropolis.

That said, Vlad can tell that the near-nightly social gatherings make my skin quite literally crawl, so he acquiesces by having us ditch his own party to cut loose in the dense, dark woods surrounding Chernobyl. It's a small comfort to know he's not beyond mischief, even if said mischief includes feasting on wild animals and the odd trespasser until the sun threatens to peak across the horizon. Vlad believes that my gleeful, uninhibited viciousness is a blessing to witness, just as I believe that he is capable of great compassion as he is cruelty. It's romantic in a peak gothic horror way: strolling arm-in-arm behind the treeline, drenched in cooling blood and viscera on the edge of civilization, unburdened if only for a few hours more.

[pixies-and-poets]

Hi Courtney!

I hope your engagement is going well 🥰

I was wondering if you'd maybe like to elaborate why "Foolish Explorer" is your favorite character trope?

Hope you enjoy your Tuesday!! ❤️❤️❤️

Hello!! things are going well except that we've been keeping physical distance for like a week since I have covid... It's been difficult but I think we might have actually avoided him catching it despite living in the same house!! We'll have to see, but I'm pretty much better and he's still feeling fine. Knocking on wood!

Certainly, this is one of my all-time favorite character tropes and I think it comes down to a few things.

I like characters who are quite flawed or even portrayed as "unlikeable", but not bad people at heart. People who are cowardly, ignorant, selfish without being aware of how it's harmful... and characters who can be annoying to others without realizing it. I like it when these types of characters are part of a heroic team, or at least important in the journey of characters who are more typically heroic, because it shows that not everyone has to be a shining example of morality, not everyone has to be perfect, to make a positive difference in the world. You just have to do your best with the person you are. Examples include Flavio, of course, or Linebeck from the Zelda series. Or Groose, also from Zelda (not as much a "foolish explorer" but an example of these points regardless).

The important thing for me, that validates the above points, is that these characters at least learn to be a little BETTER by the end. They may still not be characters that we'd admire or want to emulate in every way, but they learn something, have some self-reflection, and they come out of the journey a bit different. If they don't even make the effort at self-improvement at all, I'm not gonna love them as a character!

Foolhardy adventurers usually embody these ideas and often couple it with a love of exploration and adventure that gives their actions a sincere core, even if they can go about things in a clumsy, ineffective or imperfect way. This is why I like Flavio or Kolorado more than Flint Cragley. The first two seem to genuinely want to make discoveries and have a love of what they're doing, even though they are complete doofuses about it. You can tell they get excited about their adventures. Flint is just kinda there for his own fame and glory, it's all a show/an act to him.

So to sum it up, to me the "foolish adventurer" is someone who combines being flawed with a loveable sincerity of action and purpose!

[sheallielly]

Mimicry (10-20-10)

🫥 Program: “Mimicry” (10–20–10)

Keywords: identity confusion, people-pleasing, self-erasure, adapting to survive. Also seen as: – “Living Through Others’ Expectations” – “The Mask Mirror” – “Shape-shifter Identity” – “The Good Child Wound”

⸻

🌟 Core Essence

This person is highly perceptive, deeply attuned to others, and has likely learned early in life that adapting = survival or love. They develop a pattern of mimicking behaviors, values, or appearances to please, blend in, or avoid punishment or rejection.

Their true self? Often hidden under layers of performance, role-playing, or “being what others need.”

“If I reflect what you want, you’ll accept me. If I show my truth… you might leave.”

⸻

🧬 Energetic Breakdown • 10 ��� Responsibility, role identity, “how I must appear.” • 20 – Awakening, karmic echo, the fear of judgment, self-resurrection. • 10 (again) – Repetition of roles, double pressure to be “good,” dutiful, in control.

This creates a loop:

Taking on roles → fearing disapproval → doubling down on performance → forgetting self.

The “mimicry” isn’t manipulation. It’s protection — learned in environments where authenticity felt dangerous or not enough.

⸻

💎 Strengths • Incredible social intelligence — knows how to read a room, comfort others, or present well. • Highly adaptable — they can thrive in many environments or roles. • Great team players, mediators, and supporters. • When healed, they develop a piercing self-awareness and help others drop their own masks.

⸻

🧨 Challenges • Loss of authentic self — doesn’t know what they want, only what others expect. • Emotional exhaustion from always performing or adjusting. • May feel hollow, disconnected, or like an “actor in their own life.” • Can fear conflict, rejection, or criticism to an extreme. • Cycles of burnout from never being able to “just be.”

⸻

❤️ In Relationships • Often becomes what their partner needs or desires — molding themselves to keep love. • Craves deep, unconditional acceptance — but fears offering their raw self. • May unconsciously attract dominant or emotionally distant partners who reinforce the “performance.” • Longs for someone who says: “You don’t have to pretend with me.”

Deepest fear: “If you saw who I really am, you’d leave.”

Deepest desire: “Please see me and stay.”

⸻

🛠️ Healing Path • Rebuild identity through self-inquiry, solitude, and creative expression. • Learn to disappoint others to stay true to self (a crucial spiritual lesson). • Explore and trust their own preferences, values, and emotions — even if they shift. • Accept that belonging doesn’t require performance.

[yeenybeanies]

👁️ 👊 💢 😨 🌋 🍁 🕷️ 🌌 🪤 👖 📎 🔥💧❤️ for Rosales! <3

questions for the ocs!!

hoooo boy this is a lot of them. under a readmore bc it's Long :U

👁️ EYE - what colour are their eyes? do people notice their eyes? is there anything special about them (shows emotion easily, literally magical…)?

his eye color is a very light brown!

since it is an unusual shade of brown, they do tend to get attention. post-mechification, now that he's a giant that has vertical pupils & a tapetum lucidum, they're kinda scary to look at, especially at night when they reflect light.

👊 PUNCH - are they quick to violence?

not really, no. while he's not afraid to throw the first punch, it does take a fair bit of provocation to get him there. this is in regards to himself, though. mess with someone he cares about, & he'll anger to physical violence a little quicker. & this man knows how to hand out naps quickly & efficiently.

💢 ANGER - what are some habits they have that will take some getting used to?

as a core, he's developed a habit of growling. it's not always on purpose; it's just an unconscious expression of his exasperation or annoyance or frustration.

😨 FEARFUL - when scared, do they go into “flight” or “fight”?

pre-mechification, he was a fighter first. as a core, he'd prefer to avoid altercations, if only because he's still very lost for what the world is like, & also because he can be devastating.

🌋 VOLCANO - how bad is their temper? is it a slow boil, or a instant explosion?

this is basically the same as the PUNCH question. pretty slow boil. his temper isn't bad. he'll get annoyed easily, but genuine anger takes time.

again, unless someone he cares about is involved.

🍁 MAPLE LEAF - what is their favorite season? why?

he's a fall lover. he likes the change from hot to chilly, and the colors on the trees. plus, it's the time of year when he gets to enjoy pumpkin. it's a nice treat.

🕷️ SPIDER - what is their biggest fear? do they have any irrational / mundane fears?

unfortunately, his biggest fear has already come to fruition, even though he's not currently aware of it :')

regarding irrational/mundane fears, though, rosales is not fond of snakes. he's not gonna freak out & run to kill it, but he won't hold someone's pet snake, or come near it.

🌌 MILKY WAY - what was the inspiration behind your oc? what was the first thing you decided about them?

my inspiration was that i like big, buff, grumpy, middle-aged men. and freckles.

the first thing i decided, i think, was his special ability that he gained from the core transformation process.

🪤 MOUSE TRAP - what will always lure them into certain danger? a loved one in danger? a promise of something they are always searching for?

loved one in danger. definitely. all regard for himself goes out the window.

👖 JEANS - what is their go-to outfit?

as a core, he's got the standard black bodysuit, and the stomach/back portion of the mech armor, as that's the only pieces of clothing he has.

back when he was human, rosales liked to wear athleisure. comfy, stretchy bottoms, and a loose top. maybe a sweater or a hoodie. stuff that let him move freely.

📎 PAPERCLIP - a random fact.

the scar he has right here is from an appendectomy. he waited so long to get it treated that his appendix busted on the operating table. it wasn't pretty.

🔥 FIRE - do they have any self destructive tendencies? what habits do they have that hinder them from becoming their best self?

after his olympic years, he put most of his energy into tending to others. sure, he'd still take care of himself, work out, eat well, etc., but most of his mental and emotional energy he spent on making sure his family, his colleagues, and his clients were happy. it often left him exhausted. he'd be told all the time to take a break, spend some time doing something he wants to do, but he rarely did.

as a competitive & olympic athlete, the focus was always on him. the pressure was always on him him him, how he had to be perfect, how he had to be the best, how he had to be tended to. so now he's just lost interested in being in the spotlight.

💧 DROPLET - random angst headcanon

all of rosales' dreams tend to end very abruptly with a loud, painful crash. he doesn't know what it is or what it means, but it always startles him awake, & leaves him with a feeling of dread. he can never manage to hold onto any of the faces or names of the people he saw.

❤️ RED HEART - their love language(s)?

it was touch. & it still is. but now he's a big giant man, so he's very apprehensive to touch.