#because i dont get home til 8:30pm

[anadorablekiwi]

Its late

Its ‘dont trust brain’ oclock

I’m trying to sleep dammit-

So Why. Pray tell. Cant i get my damn anxiety and depression and mind to shut the hell up

I feel so overwhelmed and right now my only responsibility is sleeping and i cant even do that right

[maringlechan]

Wednesday, Jan 8th, 2025

4 days late!!! AHHHH~ lets do a recap since saturday!

Sunday, Jan 5th - i stayed home for the day and did not go to the gym. I honestly dont really remember what i did on sunday....

Monday, Jan 6th - I hung out with drew for the day and then went to the bfs after! Was with him until a bit earlier tonight. Me and drew got sushi at my fav spot :3 After having lunch we went to target and ikea! I was looking for one of those pegboards to put above my desk since i think that i've got way to many things cluttering my desk space. We ended up finding the pegboards and got a price estimate, but i didnt purchase a board since i wanted to measure the space above my desk first. All the accessories too were going to be $3 or more. We also went to Petsmart to look at a few things like the food since the boys are almost out. They had so much Lion King stuff for the 30th anniversary!!! I cant believe it was 30yrs since it came out TT. I bought Chopstick the Lion King pop up tent and a little Simba costume. I think i want to go back though and get him the leash and harness set, as well as the pop up tunnel. I just feel that those are things that wont really come around again. After that i just dropped him off and went to the bfs house :333

Tuesday, Jan 7th - Hung out with the bf the whole day! I was gonna go home that day but ended up day drinking, got a little tipsy, and fell asleep a bit early by the time night time rolled around. We had a nice chill day but he was getting very frustrated from work. I got us some mexican food for dinner. He practiced his shakuhachi and told me his instructor wanted him to practice on how loudly he plays while in a low octave. He did good! His notes were very loud and projected than they were before. He told me he's been playing so much of the game "Halfsword" its just a medieval mma type of game. I know hes been showing an interest in it and i showed him i did a little bit of research on it myself and found a Seattle group that does it as well as the international medieval mma (Buhurt) that we can attend! It'll probably also be at Ren Faire so that would be cool if we did that too! We cuddled so much though a lot of the day ahhhh~~ We ended up going to bed pretty late at like 1 TT

Wednesday, Jan 8th - He woke up pretty early to do his Ukraine-English lesson. He told me wants to do it for about a year. I need to find something like that too i suppose TT. Nice chill day again though, but he was frustrated from work. He played a little bit of wu kong after the week day to let off some steam but ended up still getting upset because he couldnt beat a boss! For brekkie we had our leftovers and some super strong deathwish coffee. I did not have enough water today and the following oolong tea we had after that didnt help TT. I ended up feeling pretty lightheaded. We finished up our mexican leftovers and then i went home shortly after. He wanted me to go home a bit earlier but ended up not. I felt bad since he wanted to write and do martial arts TT. He's so close to finishing his book and rewriting one scene right now and making sure the edit flows into the rest of the novel. We watched some lego videos and also some more on the Buhurt stuff since it seems like something he'd really wanna see! I'd love for us to go check out the one thats later this year in Virginia! I ended up leaving around 8/9ish and got home at about 10pm. It was such a fun few days with him i cant wait til me, him, and the kitties are all living together again TTTTT but i wanna be with him forever with a last name <3

Its 11:30pm right now so i should be getting to bed. The plan for the rest of the week is to clean, apply for jobs, gym, keep track of finances, and see the bf again for the weekend possibly :3 other than that he said he would like to visit my side of the water and we take a few days out to see Port Angeles!

Anyways~~ goodnight!!

[dementedgnomicwizard]

schedule of Events my last few days

-tuesday night we went to see cats and got home probably around 1, tossed and turned til 7:30ish, drifted off for a bit

-wednesday 8:15AM woke up for my 9 am drawing studio, took my adderall

-wednesday 9AM-11:50AM had the first half of studio

-wednesday 11:50AM-1PM took the supply list the teacher gave me to blick bc im the only new addition to the class this semester so i was the only one who didnt have what we needed -_-

-wednesday 1PM-3:50PM second half of studio, went home and hung out for a little bit

-wednesday 4:50PM left forr my 5pm studio class

-wednesday 7:20PM studio ended and i told devin i was gonna stay in the lab and try to get just a bit more of my homework done in advance

-thursday 2:45AM i finally fucking look at the clock for a second and realize what ive done

-thursday 3:15AM i go home and shower

-thursday 4:somethingAM i realize im not gonna be able to fall asleep and resign myself to wandering our apartment until 8

-thursday 8AM started getting ready for my morning class, took my adderall

-thursday 9:30AM-11:50AM morning class

-thursday 11:50AM-12:10PM went home with devin and started listening to the tma s2 q&a together

-thursday 12:12PM julia texts me “WERE DESTROYING A TREE” without any further context and i leave the room at a sprint to get to dain’s room where i know they must surely be

-thursday 12:15PM-12:35PM we invent new tree- and sled-based sports in the parking lot

-thursday 12:35PM i excuse myself to go back inside and finish my homework before my afternoon class

-thursday 12:40-1:15 spent fruitlessly trying to get tree sap off my hands until devin wisely pours canola oil on me

-thursday 1:30-2PM finished my homework really fast and spent the rest of my time producing latex worms at a feverish pace

-thursday 2PM-4:20PM afternoon class, i stay behind for like 10 more minutes after class because i was typing up a document for my tma rp acc lmfao (this is also the class period during which i planned the tunnel tweets in their entirety)

-thursday 4:45PM i arrive back at the dorm to see if devin is ready to go to the tunnels with me and he’s not cause he’s eating soup. i hang out and wait for a little bit because i had to do make sure all the worms were dry and pack them up anyway but once the worms were packed and he still wasnt done i decided to just go by myself

-thursday 5:15PM arrive at the machinery building trying soooo hard not to look suspicious or like i’m making a beeline for the tunnels

-thursday 5:35ishPM leave the machinery building much sweatier and MUCH, MUCH more dirt-covered than when i entered

-thursday 5:45PM frantically scrub the rust/dust/dirt/tunnel muck off as much of me as i can and smoke a little of devin’s weed before we leave for class, took my afternoon/evening class adderall. realize we both forgot to shoot reference videos as we’re walking out the door, run back inside, shoot videos quickly, run to class

-thursday 6-8:20PM class, also this was when i was finally posting the tma tweets i’d drafted earlier w/ attached pics, one every few minutes

-thursday 8:30PM walk to prontos with devin

-thursday 9ish-like 12AM hang out with devin jade and g

-now it is friday 3:15 AM i dont know how i got here. i gotta go to fucking beddy  bye but i cant make myself get up to take my makeup off

[darkbrokensoul1666]

Life update

The past week has just been problem after problem. Along with so much studying, tests and assignments. It started with ballet being cancelled last week monday. Tuesday , We then tried going to the dance shop a main road was shut so we took like a 20 minute detour - then couldnt find the shop. We then went to the shop - power was out. Pull out of shop - car starts making weird noise. We get home - power is out. Wednesday we take car to mechanic. We get a loan car. These mechanics didnt call and mum didn’t know what was going on until thursday afternoon when she called. Friday they then finally think they know whats wrong with it. $1700 - $2500 to replace the part. Then starts blowing white smoke. Mechanic recommendeds we dont drive home - we do. Mum woke me up friday night coz she felt dizzy, sick and had back and stomach pain. She then drive to my brothers mechanic friend the next day and he diagnoses the cars problem in 5 minutes. Turns out its a different thing and will only cost $500. Mum has a doctors appointment sunday after church and the doctor wants mum to take these antacid tablets and have blood test and ultrasound done. I now also have a psychology assignment that i neglected to use the time in class to do so now i have pages of questions that were due today so i will probably get 10% taken off. This friday i also have a massive dance 1000 word critical review due that i havent started because once again I neglected to use the time in class. Its also super hard to work in class when everyone around you isnt. I am bloody exhausted. Today mum had the blood test and has the ultrasound wednesday. On top of this my brother attempted to fix the car but its now leaking oil. My mum told him multiple times not to drive it home but yet he did. Today one if my friends also started asking why i wasnt eating and forgot every lie I usually tell and just said nothing and made an absolute fool out of myself. We didnt have dinner til 8:30pm so i totally broke my rule of notveating after 7pm and after 6:30pm. Now its study week with exams next week and im hella stressed and its like i never had a weekend. I want to just disappear. Ive also got such a headache and have no brain space to think about this psychology assignment.

On a more positive note my mum and i were looking at dance careers yesterday. I also found a dance short course at waapa for high school students in the summer holidays that costs $530-$550 that is 5 days long and goes for like 6hrs each day. I am hoping i can do it and mum can afford it and if not my dad will offer to pay hopefully. I am also hoping to start more dance lessons next year at a proper dance school as well as with school and my current ballet teacher. Im hoping to bring my total dance hours a week to about 10 next year

[blushygalxx-blog]

Trip Diary: Dec 31st-Jan 1st 2017

well first off I dont recommend taking any psychedelics during a time like new years or daylight savings because time starts to throw you off hard. We dropped around 8:30pm, It was me, my ex, his best friend and his best friends gf (who i didnt like). Always trip with people you like, luckily i didnt see much of her because she was hiding or some shit lol. This was my first experience with any psychedelic, we took ETH-LAD i took a tab and a half (analogue of LSD). Right after dropping my ex’s best friend (lets call him Rob) and his gf (lets call her Cathy) started playing Kibry while my ex and I were playing around with a synth. 45 mins later I remember getting the strong urge to stand up and once i did i turned to look at the TV and the colors were so incredibly vibrant that it almost hurt my eyes, my ex followed me and sat down on the floor, i laid down in front of him and the floor felt really good against my skin so i started rolling around on the ground and he started hysterically laughing and said “You look like a yeti” his laugh was contagious and we both devolved into hysterical laughter, id say from this point we were tripping.

Theres a big gap from that moment to about 2 hrs later, we are all sitting at Robs mini bar, its about 11:50, I completely forgot it was New years, all of us did, we were just playing with a kazoo and eating vodka chocolates and listening to synth pop, but a bit later i check my phone and had a very strong “what the fuck moment” because it was 1:47 Jan 1st 2017, i turned to my ex and said something like “how did the year change??” then remembered it was new years, but i was still so confused because we didnt watch the clock change or anything. Sometime after that i starting rolling around on the floor again claiming i was “swimming” then i tried to eat gummy bears but was too afraid to swallow.

We listened to dark side of the moon ofc, i knew all the worlds, I embraced Rob and sang the last 2 songs in full with him while crying, i pulled some of my hair out after and claimed i was worthless, then forgot was i was doing and started to draw lol.

Going in a room with a closed door is weird while tripping because it feels like a different place, basically me and my ex when in the bathroom to fuck but i thought we went to someone elses house, acid sex is weird, i decided after to fill the sink up with warm water and baptize myself, then put all my clothes (bra and underwear included) on inside out.

It was now about 4am, so me and my ex wanted to head home even tho we were still tripping, we first laid on the floor looking at this disco ball light and with our “minds” made the light stop spinning and the room spin instead, then i laid directly on top of him and made out, i thought our bodies became one, we stayed there til 5am.

we smoked before out uber picked us up, then went outside, this was canada in January so it was freezing and snow was everywhere, i thought i was on the moon, our uber asked how we were and i responded “great, just was in a lake, it was great” my ex stayed silent.

once back home i had vivid dreams while still awake about being dead and getting dragged thru the snow while looking at my murderer. i told my ex if he didnt hold my hand til i fell asleep id die, i woke up at 10am the next morning feeling like the world around me was fake, smoked weed 6 hrs later and felt like the trip restarted, but then slept 12 hrs and felt midly okay.

10/10 enjoyed it

[sophocused]

02 02 2019

my brain is tired dududududuu~

wrote notes for 3 hours and my hand hurts, wish I used today for interval studying but I woke up late (1pm) after staying up til 4am. very not my norm aaa but I sort of dont regret it bc my commute from work home last night took 2 hours. in those 2 hours a lot of things occurred downtown in my waiting for my late bus that were off-putting to say the least.

I immediately went on to do my first online test for psyc bc although it's open until 11:59:59pm I dont like the feeling of my day revolving around it. it was a 50 min test, much harder than I imagined it would be, but taught me what kind of information I need to really focus on while studying/teaching myself. I got 28/40 (70%) which is not too bad since the test is worth 10% of my mark. Next one is on March 2nd, I'll make sure to really prepare for that one! I need to start working on my essay for the class too, that's 30% of my mark.

I got 100% on my anth quiz though, which was a little mood boost since my first 2 quizzes I would only get 90%. Each quiz is thankfully only worth 2% of my mark and fairly easy, like high school biology.

watched suckerpunch extended version with my sister last night and it was v nostalgic. it wasnt a perfect movie, but it was an interesting one. lots of holes in plot and lots of convenience writing but I love the badassery always. (sad to see the only two poc girls get killed, amber was my fave)

I made champorado with my sister last night (chocolate rice in my culture) and it was delicious. I accidentally made too much, but it was soo good that it was majority of what I ate today haha...

I did laundry and took a while to shower today. I cleared some of wires bugging me about my room floor, too. I'm working on making my Saturdays way more productive than they are, like girl, shower!!

I did major skincare stuff tho which I dont regret, and didnt end up starting notes until about 8:30pm and finished around 11:30pm

it's currently 12:04am and I'm tempted to finish the champorado because I realize I didnt eat enough today, but also I cant sleep with my overflowing trash bin by my desk staring back at me. Also because my pillow cases and blanket are still in the dryer.

I have church with fam that I have to wake up at 7:15am for, and then we'll go on our usual breakfast date. Once we get home, I know dad will go to sleep, so that's when i hope to catch a quick power nap, work out for an hour, then focus on notes for majority of the day with cleaning and folding here and there.

I'll also be planning my whole week from there.

This post has been like a mind map for me heh, I'm off to change my trash bin bag because this is bothering my energy.

good night I hope you're all well 💛