#being like. but wait. you are not the mc. also. the part of your brain that decides what and who you like and seems to function with

[spilling-blood]

After getting over Carla after 8 years I thought this is it, while it will always hold a special place in my heart, and Yui is still queen, my brain may finally be over diabolik lovers, because I may like them but I don't feel so strongly about Reiji, Shu, or Shin.

What I didn't consider was my brain deciding it didn't like having a space not filled by a fictional person who terrifies us yet we have inexplicably latched onto and grown to love, and making me dip my toes in with Azusa.

[syluses]

HEART WANTS WHAT IT WANTS

𓍯𓂃 PART TWO (2) of the stepdad! sylus x reader series

(2) THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND

𓍯𓂃 CONTENT: stepdad! sylus therefore step/pseudocest, eventual smut, nsfw, dubcon, slowburn, yandere undertones, all characters are 18+ (mc is presently 23; sylus is in early forties), possessive & yandere behaviors, age difference, daddy kink, unreliable narrator, drinking, non-evol au, modern au, lowkey enemies to lovers, lots of (sexual) tension, loss of virginity, emotional breakdowns, some angst, some fluff, a lil bit of everything; tags will be added as story progresses— but know the story is relatively triggering

𓍯𓂃 SIDENOTE: ayyy finally got chapter 2 out ✨ apologies for the wait!! but i hope u enjoy this one my friends :] 💕 also sorry for any typos PLEASE overlook them i beg :,) i hate the edit/revise process it took SO long but i hope my sleep-addled brain did me decent as i went thru to correct stuff. oh also i made a teeny mistake in part one, but i fixed it and its very inconsequential (used wrong number: 6 changed to 7). but anyway just letting u know if ur very observant & noticed a difference lol!! [art credit: @/chimmyming on twitter/X]

It’s hard to be secretive, tiptoeing down the hallway toward the stairs, when halfway through it opens up into the living room’s overhang.

If someone were sitting on the couch, and they heard so much as a creak from above, all it’d take is a glance thrown over their shoulder to spot you with a hand hesitantly placed on the banister, leery of stepping down to the first floor.

Nervewracking.

Perhaps it’s a bit dramatic to compare it to walking into the lion’s den- but you’re not the most talkative of persons, especially not with him, and it does seem daunting in your head to be cornered into conversation. Like prey meeting predator. Small meeting big. One delicate discussion could do you in, but you won’t bet on your demise being brought along so… easily.

To your immense relief, when you you peek around the stone column and survey the area below (mainly the L-shaped sofa, facing the massive wall-mounted TV above the fireplace), you find it empty.

At that, you let out a quiet breath. Some of your courage returns.

If you had spotted the twins, it would’ve been manageable, more so than if it was their dad, anyway.

It was only an hour ago (well, an hour and ten minutes, but you hope they won’t hold that against you— and considering all their tardy slips in highschool, they wouldn’t have the right) that you’d held conversation with them, and it went alright.

It’s a bit harder for you to admit that it was actually pretty nice to see them again.

Cathartic, even.

There’s a part of you that’s vulnerable and girlish- carefully stowed beneath the tough skin you lay on in front of most of everyone else- locked somewhere safe- and yes, it did miss them.

But you’re meant to dislike the three of them. Your meddling stepfamily who slipped into the cracks of your home, your mother’s heart, no different than an invasive species would. Stuck a foot into the door of your life and pressed until the hinge gave.

Once, it was easy. As effortless as breathing.

You didn’t have to think about it, or deliberate on it, or make all the justifications in your head- no, you hated them and that was it.

That feeling was meant to be final. Set in stone.

You thought it was.

For a time you even likened Sylus to Cinderella’s evil stepmother and his two conniving sons to the insufferable stepsisters. Oh, it’s childish, you know; looking back on those moments, you don’t know whether you want to hug the teenage girl you’d been or laugh in the face of her.

As it stands, though, Anastasia and Drizella aren’t half the monsters you’d once liked to believe. Awfully enough, you’ve warmed up to them, maybe even came to love them.

You’re stubborn, not stupid: Luke and Kieran have a special place in your heart and you recognize that.

You’re sure that they do, too. It’s what makes them bolder during every confrontation; brings out the smiles where they once paled. Scared you’d yell or shriek for your mom to just—

Get these two idiots out of my room!

That was then, though.

Things are different now. Changed.

…The ‘Lady Tremaine’ in this picture is still a work in progress. If you’re being honest, you wouldn’t be too terribly upset if it stayed that way—

No. But no, because…

Your mother would’ve been happy if you got along with him. Made amends. It’s a truth as sour as it is undebatable.

“Baby, please- he’s a good man, really. Can you just try, for me? I know you miss your dad, I know you do, I do, too-“

‘Does she?’ To save your hide, you bite that remark down, but listen on just as grumpily.

“-but I think that this can be a good thing if you just-“

Her words echo in the walls of your head. Plangent, bouncing. Like a gunshot ringing out through a canyon, it’s still loud in your conscience, even more so now that she won’t be around to nag you on the matter any further.

—“Smiled.”

If you don’t like Sylus, you’re the bad guy, right? And damn it all if that doesn’t dredge up an ounce of bitterness in you, but—

…For the sake of this trip, for the sake of her no longer being here (and oh, what you wouldn’t give so she could be here), you’ll do your best to swallow down your misgivings about your stepfather.

And you’ll be good.

Two weeks.

Reminding yourself of that for what must be the millionth time, you push off the truffle-wrap pillar to continue into the lofty hall. Starting down the wide, marble staircase in silence.

You’re not so sure where their father is. You definitely have your guesses— A fancy-shmancy meeting or outing that’s called him outside of the estate, or perhaps he’s simply in his study working, running an errand— All of which you hope are correct for the sake of avoiding him.

This late lunch of yours and the twins’ should be just that.

Yours and the twins’.

✦

The further you press into the first floor, the more you smell whatever the private chef is cooking.

Delicious, whatever it is. And no surprise there- the man who hired him demands only the best of the best. He’ll brook nothing less.

As you get closer, the aromas (some too faint to label, others almost dominating your senses: garlic, a pinch of ginger, the mouthwatering scent of meat) blend into a savory potpourri. A cohesive, expertly-made dish, you’re sure.

It’s true that in the past five years since your moving out that your visits have become more sporadic, far and few in between, but meals gathered around a tabletop brimming with tasty sides and entrées will always be a distinct memory you hold of this place.

I mean, you were all but forced by your mother to endure them. Thus, dinner became a special time for you and your stepfamily to bond.

Even Sylus, the endlessly busy CEO of some lucrative company you pretend not to know the name of, made room within his schedule where he could.

However, bonding is not what generally happened.

Teenage you always thought those dinners were stupid. Awkward at the best of times. Smiles too tight to be polite, hands passing around bowls you’d stick your nose up to. Not out of disgust, no, the platters never failed to make you drool- but because you’d take your dad’s homemade roast chicken over your stepfather’s insincere, gourmet trays any day of the week.

To be honest? you’d been mean to them, you’ll admit that much. Cruel even. A big brat with an even bigger bone to pick. You and your family didn’t come from rags, but your origins were infinitely more humble than the twin’s, than what Sylus had— yet you were prissy and rude in a way that they somehow weren’t... Presumptuous.

So upset with the new arrangement you couldn’t think straight.

“Y/n, pick up the fork for God’s sake- can’t you see your father went through all this just to have a meal with us tonight?”

Placatingly, “Honey. It’s alright.”

It’s not quite a snarl that you throw her way, but it’s close. With no one here to spank you, you’re allowed to mouth off a little, be unruly. No one’s here to stop you— your mother’s never had the arm for the paddle and regardless of that, she clearly shouldn’t be responsible over you if she can’t even make good decisions for herself.

To date, her worst decision yet is bringing that asshole around…

Pointedly ignoring the attention that’s gravitated to you, you scowl.

Maybe you are pushing the part of brat a touch too far- a shock, taking your past obedience into play- but how else will you get her to see you? Your hurt? I mean, the twins misbehave endlessly at school and at best, they get a slap on the wrist, no doubt because of their mogul of a father, but you don’t miss the laughs or rueful glances tossed their way.

The positive feedback.

“…Father?” You snip, eyes laser-focused on the woman at the far end of the table. The twins juggle between watching you and their dad with bated breath, half grinning in mischievous delight.

For several moments, the latter doesn’t move.

Sure enough, though, that cardinal gaze finds its roost on you. Not that you’re paying it any mind.

The air shifts when you open your mouth again, rising from the table with a start. The finely-placed cutlery jumps as you do.

“I don’t care if you’ve married him, made him your ‘quote on quote’ husband, that’s not my father and never will be. And these stupid boys that trail me all damn day long aren’t my family, either!”

“Whoa-ho! We caught a stray, bro!”

A beat of stunned silence.

Galileo crosses your mind; mainly what he did when the spotlight fell to him. The point is that there’s still time to recant, the rational part of your brain whispers. To backtrack.

Your cheeks warm. Heart pounding in your chest at the embarrassment of voicing your emotions, making a literal stand. But you can’t stop now. It’s too late to.

“A-And…” A tremble. You’re- You’re trembling, comes the small revelation. Ignoring it, you barely repress a wince, standing there uncertainly.

Finally, your mother- finding her bearings- angrily sputters out your government name.

You almost cow to it.

But you can’t be weak, not now, not in front of them, and-

In a frantic moment, your eyes dart over opposite the table to collide with his, your voice shaking wildly as the twins, at either side of you, snicker.

You swallow down the dregs of your self-consciousness to uncivilly pick up your fork and wave it at him.

“And you! Don’t even get me started on how awful you are! What you’ve done to me!”

All along you’ve done your damnedest to ignore him, only adding in your two cents where it was absolutely necessary. The last month or two you’ve spent under the same roof as him has been nothing less than an excellent demonstration of the cold shoulder on your part. You want the credit for that.

So when you point a literal finger, staring him down like you would prey through a muzzle and furrow your brow as unbidden tears wet your lash-line, his eyes actually double in size. Your stepfather, having forgotten to breathe by the looks of it (albeit, you have too), straightens by a fraction.

Good. That’s...

That’s good, you think.

Something in the back of your mind says ‘heel,’ says ‘don’t poke the bear,’ warns in every possible language you can think of that this is NOT a good idea. He’s rich enough to fill whole swimming pools with cash and powerful enough to move people like chess pieces— probably nudge them out of the game and off the board, too.

But he’ll never be the man of your house. You won’t allow it. So call it sheer stupidity on your end or just a death wish but—

“Y-You’ve stolen everything from me!”

On your right, Luke blinks with hesitant awe, his amusement petering out. Kieran’s jaw shuts. The foot he’d been kicking you with under the table draws away from yours. He exchanges a brief, suddenly sobered look with his brother as everything you’ve been holding back on these past several weeks looses to the surface.

“Y/n-!”

“You took it all! My mother, my dad’s honor, even my fucking house-!”

For the second time, your government name flies across the panel of demurred faces, but you’ve reached your melting point. The watershed where fear and politeness, all the conventional little things you’re supposed to respect and operate by, warps into hot unbridled anger.

This is a cut that originated from your father’s death, one exacerbated awfully by Sylus and his two sly, obnoxious sons- so you think it’s due time to let it bleed.

Bleed, it does.

But then- “You ruined my life, you-“

A breath. Stuttering and shallow and tender. It’s horrifying to realize it came from you.

“Y-You….”

Through the blur is a low, gentle murmur.

Rich and thick. You think even if your ears ceased to work, something in your chest could still recognize it; the bass moves through your ribs and rattles them.

In your periphery, for as fogged as it’s become what with the tears that suddenly speckle the room- the ones you vaguely acknowledge but do all you can to hold, even if just for a few more moments- the silver-haired man sets down his utensil. Nonchalant per usual. With unrivaled class.

It pisses you off.

Without looking at your frazzled mother, he raises a hand to calm her. “Shh, it’s alright, it’s alright. Let her speak.”

Speak…?

Oh- Is that what he fucking thinks this is? That you’ve stood, clinking the side of your glass with a spoon to humbly direct the diners’ attention from the plates spread tastefully before them to you as you prepare a fancy speech of sorts-?

This isn’t an announcement you’re making. This is not even a conversation. It’s just-

It’s just-

The epiphany that every set of eyes is on you including the chef’s (still tucked in the kitchen, as poor as any man could be as he hurriedly cleans up)— and that you are being treated no different than a dangerous animal that needs patience and slow movement to be handled, corralled back into a fucking cage—

It’s so infuriating you go quiet.

Your brain reaches a lapse and you shut up. Lips flattening into a pursed line immediately, you ball your fists and scamper back off to where it’s safest.

Your room.

“Sis, wait, Kieran said he’s sorry for kicking you under the table-“

You’d ignored it all and then you’d cried.

“Kieran,” an unexpected growl. “A word.”

…You suppose time has a funny way of soothing, though, because right now when you recollect the moment, you find the humor in it and scoff quietly.

“Dad, wait, I-I was just kidding around with her!”

Yeah okay, it was a bit embarrassing- you were a bit embarrassing- but you won’t hold that against sixteen year old you. She knew fuck all else how to navigate.

The big house is familiar and airy as you walk through the lower floor, as quiet as you left it.

Even if you’d forgotten the layout, whatever fragrance wafting from the kitchen would be enough to guide you there.

You wonder if it’s some kind of stirfry. A far cry from the humble PB&J’s you’ve been making yourself at home with chips sometimes as a side, but your tummy growls for it all the same.

You haven’t ate since sometime yesterday. As your tongue wets itself in anticipation, you’re made very aware of that now.

You spot the rice cooker on the side counter when you finally walk in and the blurred figures of the twins as they turn to look at you.

Luke, perched on a bar stool to eagerly watch the chef work his magic, hops off just to pull out another one at its right. The look in his eye, glittering, full of anticipation, tells you verbatim to ‘sit right here’. You don’t bother protesting- you’re already some minutes late after all- and climb up onto the seat between them.

Kieran, at your left, scoots closer to sling his arm over your shoulder. You let it happen with a small wince. The chair supporting the other twin gives a short screech when he, too, inches closer to fold his arms on the counter, lean his head on them, and angle his cheek to look at you.

“So, sis, how do you like Linkon so far?”

Not paying them much attention, you quirk an eyebrow.

Between watching the chef as he deftly tosses the pan back and forth (broccoli, you see now, with meat cubes he folds in) and glancing at the archways connecting the rest of the house into the kitchen- eyes peeled for someone- the twins are not your priority right now.

At the top, that list looks something like this: Eat a nice midday meal without any incident involving their dad.

“I’ve lived in Linkon almost all my life, don’t act like this is my first time here,” you poke back, albeit in a somewhat hushed tone. The walls might as well have ears.

Kieran reaches out to run an idle finger down the jut of your shoulder, his chin lazily propped up by his hand.

He looks at you.

“Sis, do you even realize for how long you were gone?”

His voice is light. Conversational. You’re not so deluded, though, by their indifferent, laidback act. You’ve known them not for a decade but not far off from that either, and you’ve learned to catch the whiff of trouble in the air before it blows its wind your way.

When you finally throw them each a gander, hesitantly prying your gaze from the open entries, the delight masked behind each placid set of eyes is absolutely there— just hiding well.

They’re getting much more amusement out of this than they’re letting on.

You’ll give them credit here: they’ve gotten better at pretending they’re not up to no good,… but there’s no bamboozling you.

You think about it for a few seconds before quipping back. “Almost seven months,… right?”

“Right,” Luke chirps beside you, “Seven whole months!” You turn your head to focus on him now.

(Ah, that’s right- you inwardly alert yourself upon notice- no matter who you’re facing, the other will inevitably be in your blindspot… Have to keep on your toes these upcoming weeks if you don’t want them pulling a trick on you.)

He pouts his lips, ever dramatic, to play up the kicked expression and make it all the more impactful as they guilt trip you. “Seven whole months where Kieran and I were left alllllll on our lonesome. Left to fend for ourselves.”

“Oh, you big babies.” With a huff, half-smiling, you lean out to flick his forehead. His hood slips off when he tries to nod away from your attack, laughing softly as wild, red tufts come loose.

“You’re plenty old enough now to care for yourselves. You can’t always rely on me for everything. Besides,” you start, thoughtful, and this is when your already quiet voice slinks into a whisper, one the boys draw in to hear.

Luke’s attention drifting past your shoulder, “you already have the big boss man covering your asses in every sense of the word.”

From the archway, a sonorous voice rings out.

“She’s right, you know.”

You and Kieran snap your heads over to look. The chef (and you don’t why you’re suddenly staring at him, or the ground, for that matter, nervous) gives a little glance his way, dipping his chin respectfully, but doesn’t note him beyond that. A big grin blooms across the lower half of Luke’s face. You’d smack it off if you could.

Beside you, Kieran suddenly lets out a chuckle, both of the twins once more very interested in you- particularly the reaction you’re trying to hide- as you swallow and look away.

Under the broad arch, their stepfather adjusts his sleeves before casually propping himself against the wall, arms folded.

You risk a glance over and instantly regret it when you catch his eyes on yours, a brow quirked teasingly.

…Directed at the boys, you realize when he speaks again. Of course. “You two lean on your sister far too much, don’t you think? I’d say you’re lucky she’s been so patient with you both.”

A huff from one of them. But they’re so similar it might as well come from the other. “Hah, I have the patience of a saint, especially when it comes to her! Don’t forget, dad, how long it took for me to get her to even talk to me-“

Frowning, you open your mouth to argue against that, to defend your past-self’s choices (because she had every reason to ignore the obnoxious pair), but to your suprise Luke beats you to the punch.

“Bro, you have to admit,” he starts with a sheepish laugh, “we were kind of annoying kids… I mean, we were pretty much always trying to find a new way to bother her…”

Curtly, you close your mouth. That deep, rumbling voice sounds out again- light in tone- and your heart skips a beat.

“Honesty’s not a bad start... Kieran, you might benefit from taking notes from your brother.”

“Eh…”

From behind the island, tucked in front of the stove- you swear you hear the cuisiner chuckle.

The pan sizzles. Your mouth waters and you’re reminded of how hungry you are, but the longer the silver-haired man lingers in the entryway the more you’re afraid he’s there to stay.

It was supposed to be just the three of you eating together. Not- Not him. And yeah, sure, this is his house at the end of the day— you wouldn’t be you if you weren’t already painfully aware of that- a fact that’s more obvious than ever now that your only real tether to this place, your mother, is gone— but why did he have to show up now of all times?

As every gripe starts to form in your head-

Two weeks. And then, and then it’ll be over for the last time.

-you silence them.

A moment passes and Luke, still studying you with the ghost of a grin, asks what you all really want to know.

“So, dad, are you staying for lunch?”

A beat. You furtively glance up in time to watch him check his expensive wristwatch, his brow furrowed.

“Lunch, you say?” He chuckles, ruby-red eyes practically sparkling when he lifts his chin, one corner of his mouth curved- though you can tell he’s trying to mask it. “And I guess this is the early bird special?”

“Sleepyhead Y/n here rolled out of bed late.”

You huff, crossing your arms, distracting yourself with the busy chef. “And these two all but barged in while I was still busy unpacking.”

Like clockwork, much of the mirth in his expression wanes. He frowns expectantly, voice neither stern nor flat but something in between. “Boys. What did I tell you about not pestering our guest while she’s still here?”

Luke and Kieran snicker. You bite down on a grin.

“Yeah, boys,” you murmur to be annoying, just loud enough for them to hear. That’s the hope, at least.

Sylus’s little smirk returns with a vengeance. He refolds his arms, adjusting.

“…Anyway, though. I can’t stay. I have a meeting I need to sit in at the main office, unfortunately. I would’ve…” A raking of his eyes between the three of you, interested, and a brief pause, “Enjoyed that, though.”

He hums, saying more to himself now than to any of you, “another time.”

For a number of moments, the air seems oddly tense. A miasma of something unsaid hangs between the four of you, thickening the air between, and in the split second before someone breaks the silence, you’re struggling to pinpoint the root cause.

It’s just the ice from last night, you decide quietly, the bits of it that didn’t break. The friction left over.

You’re still settling in, after all.

…And yet when his gaze finds yours again, something not to be uttered in it as cherry hues zero in on you, his lashes fluttering ever so slightly—

The pulse in your chest trips and picks itself back up again.

You blink, looking down to his chest. When your stare sweeps up again to his face, almost hesitant to find what may be waiting there, he’s addressing the twins and it’s already gone.

“Well. I’m out, then. Boys: don’t drive your sister crazy. And… Kitten…”

Your brow pinches unwittingly. There, again, is that strange yet patient twinkle in his eye and it steals all the breath from your lungs in one fell swoop.

Either side of you, Luke and Kieran trade off between appearing uncertain and then appearing just as eager. Behind the steaming stove, even the chef, cottoning onto the shift in atmosphere, tosses the briefest of looks over his shoulder to assess the situation.

You nervously wet your lip. “Y-Yeah?”

Promptly, your stepfather’s countenance smooths out into an easy, pellucid smile. A whit challenging; a whit encouraging— but not at all reluctant, no, the mite of intimidation in his gaze is a simple result of your clouded thinking these past few days. Nothing more.

“Don’t pull your punches if they do.”

A swallow. “Alright.”

The twins, no different than conspiring, bothersome little rats, slap a hand over their mouths to hide a laugh, and then their dad is skimming between all three of you in your row at the counter. Albeit, his tone is too gentle for them—

“Call if you need something,” he suggests.

And then he’s gone.

A tumbleweed blows through. Kieran turns to you afterward, Luke’s hand idly dangling off your shoulder, the pair far too comfortable with taking up your space- but for now, obedient enough.

“Well, chef, how’s it looking?”

Lunch is served on a silver platter.

Swallowing down your reservations, your typical discomfort with their casual, sumptuous lifestyle, you fold to your hunger and dig in.

Kieran, ever the pest, laughs when you finish before them, shoveling a share of his saucy broccoli onto your plate. His grin is shit-eating, but you can appreciate the generosity laced under his teasing remark for what it is.

“Wow, someone’s hungry, huh? Bet you’re wishing you ate during your flight!”

✦

In the hours after, you trampoline between idling through the massive home, revisiting various memories you hold of each room and long corridor, and sitting down with a hand over your full belly. Thinking.

Maybe all the reflection isn’t for the better, though, as much as you try to keep optimistic by playing dumb to your circumstances.

You don’t blame the boys for being so energetic, even amidst the doom and gloom that’s reared its head in just the past few days— it’s a lot to handle, everything with your mother, sure it is, but they’re known for their mischief, for being nothing but happy-go-lucky. Besides… sometimes grief manifests itself in strange ways. Whether it be through inconvenient fits of laughter or a stone-faced apathy, it’s all of the same brood: an interesting yet no less instinctual coping mechanism.

Considering you’ve been forcefully naive surrounding your reasons for being flown out, you know plenty about those mechanisms yourself.

It’s not impossible that they’re mourning her in their own way, the twins. Behind all the admittedly strange, insouciant remarks and the carelessness around such a delicate situation- tasteless at the best of times- you think you see it, the cracks.

The fleeting blips of unease in Luke’s eyes. The moments where the room goes quiet after a good joke makes its round through and he has to blink something away from his conscience. Or the gelidity of his brother, for that matter. The wide-eyed stare into nothingness before he, too, shakes it away like whatever it is is no more than an intrusive thought to be tossed aside and disregarded.

Not to mention they’re gentler with you. More… chivalrous, almost.

Exhibit A:

The boys approach you closer to sunset in your bedroom, their polite, small smiles and knocks before coming in pleasant surprises each.

Perched on your bedroom’s dormer window, you boredly flip through a book you’ve read at least thrice as they ask if you’ve found a dress yet for the funeral, as respectful as they ever could be.

On cue, your world weathers at the edges. Like paper thinning through after its corner is put to a lighter.

Right, right. A dress. The- The funeral….

You’ve not even been in the Qin estate for 24 hours but you’re already letting these things- these very paramount things- slip from your mind. They should be in the forefront of it, but the more you dwell on them (your priorities: using these two weeks to prepare for the ceremony, finding suitable attire, hopefully going through her belongings once you’re ready enough), the more it hurts, so you just shut it out.

See, all of this— the dreadful knowing that your veritable mother is gone and in terms of blood and bone family, you’re now left utterly alone (that maybe if you’d just- fucking hung around a bit more you somehow could’ve reversed her fate)— has obviously affected you as much as it has your stepfamily if not more- considering they were the ones who found her and all. But the twins, and even their father, are demonstrating a master class in composure, and you don’t know whether to find gratitude in their lack of flying off the handle (in this hell, someone needs to remain coolheaded) or be offended by it.

It almost feels like she was never here.

Like nothing went wrong... But you can’t really blame them for their cool and collected behaviors, because you’re putting up a strong front yourself.

Maybe your mother wasn’t the twins’ given at birth, sure... But they operated as a true family. Even when you were bitter and stuck-up and rude, the four of them were tight-knit, so much so that eventually you felt like the fucking interloper in it all, the outlying number in the equation.

So you quietly understand that there’s hurt involved on their side around her death- whether they’re being loud about it or not- and choose not to tally it against them.

…Perhaps, you think, it’s high time for you to retire your childhood grudges, anyway.

You close the book, smoothing over the cover.

If the five-second rule applies— you use four and a half to pick up your pieces off the floor and formulate a reply, not hiding how crestfallen you are.

“No. I… I haven’t even went shopping yet. I mean, I figured-“

A thick swallow on your end- and an exhale that sounds more like the stirrings of a panic attack and the boys are at your side in a moment. Their softer facets coming through as they join you on the loft window.

Luke takes the worn stuffed animal he almost crushes, dutifully ignoring its matted fur, and places it in your lap to distract you as you struggle to articulate your emotions. Kieran does his best to not scrutinize you too much, knowing you typically don’t like the attention, while you fidget with the plushie and give them an odd show of vulnerability.

I mean, fuck it. They see you as their sister, and you’re tired of pretending to be too tough to rely on them as your brothers, so—

“I- I figured we had two whole weeks, you know? And… And that’s plenty of time to just get a dress later. Have- Have you two gotten everything ready for it?”

“Yeah,” Luke murmurs back, taking your hand in his to swallow it up in warmth. It surprises you but you don’t make a comment. As if wanting to be included as well, or maybe he’s just mad his brother beat him to the punch, Kieran quietly nudges the plushie from your other hand and intwines his fingers with yours.

Your cheeks warm.

Your heart, ricocheting in your chest, whispers something you don’t quite catch as one of them sluggishly props his chin on your shoulder, mumbling a hey, it’s alright as you furiously blink, and you’re inundated with a foreign sense of- of—

Security? …Is that it?

“We went with dad yesterday to buy the suits.”

“Before he picked you up at the airport,” Luke clarifies in a light tone.

At your back, the sun glares over a chilly courtyard, lighting the fountain and iron-wrought gates with liquid, reflective gold. It only makes the near identical visages either side of you look all the more daring and impish— boyishly handsome— as dusk washes its hues over the three of you.

It’s just a little jarring.

A set of knuckles, almost experimentally, caresses your toasty cheek.

…For perhaps the first documented time in history, you don’t bite.

“We can take you, if you want? There’s a place in town that can tailor something perfectly for you. We can go tonight to get your measurements, sis, what do you think? Just get it done?”

It’s… not a bad idea. Far from it, actually.

You’d be able to quiet the restless part of your mind. Accomplish this seemingly easy task that’s become gargantuan in your head all within the span of just one night. To top it all off, it’d be with the added bonus of the twins’ brotherly support.

“A-Actually,” you start, lifting your chin to look at Luke, and then Kieran, voice thin, “I was, um, wondering if you two could take me somewhere else.”

They wait, owlish.

You meekly continue, “I’ve already read all the books I have here. I was thinking if you could drive me to that store downtown, just so I can pick up a few. Something to, um, fill in the time while I’m here, you know?“

Kieran blinks at you, dark eyes examining your face carefully, like he’s taking it in in a new light. You’re sure they don’t know what to make of you right now: for most if not all of your teen years, you played the part of distant stepsister very well, never wore your emotions on your sleeve and hesitated to be open with any of the members of your stepfamily.

Perhaps they think you’re taking a page from their book— setting them up for some grandiose joke so you can cackle in their faces.

Luke, smiling faintly, nudges your shoulder with his and leans in. “Sure, sis. Me and Kieran will take you. I guess you haven’t changed too much while you’ve been gone, huh? You’re still a big bookworm.”

“A big nerd.”

“Alright, you two,” you chuckle lightly, jabbing them both playfully- to which they both offer up a fake, dramatic grunt of pain to- before wiping the tear that almost beads at your eye. You hope they don’t notice. But if they do, they don’t make any sly remark about it. For that you’re thankful.

It seems you’ve all matured quite a bit since pre-adulthood, but it’s somehow more obvious this time around.

This visit is different from the last in more ways than one.

Looking between them both, hardly able to hold their respective gazes as your pulse swings in your throat— “Thank you”— you murmur, gentle.

For as embarrassing as it is to be vulnerable, you let yourself be just a little sweet with them... Considering your mother is gone, and the unsteady grounds you stand on with Sylus especially- the veritable owner of this home- you think you’re less of an inhabitant here and more of a… guest.

Once these two weeks are up and the funeral concludes, you’ll be going away again. Probably for the last time. Nothing will call you back.

(You’d been such a brat. What would want to?)

The twins, unable to hide the little, genuine smirks rippling across their faces, regard you inquisitively when something like sadness flashes across your gaze.

You clear your throat. That thought of finally escaping your stepfamily- your stepfather and all he represented- for good shouldn’t make something in your heart tremble. But oh, it does.

Politely, you brush off their hands and rise to your feet. You’re not sure what’s gotten into you, but you plaster on an awkward yet no less friendly smile and cross your arms.

“So, boys? You ready to go now? Or…?”

Kieran, the utter moron he is, comments something about how he was born ready, jumping up, and then they’re ushering you out the door and into the hall, towards the stairs, in a two-person stampede.

✦

You buy a book.

Three, for good measure, each thicker than the one before. Just something to occupy your mind in the windows of silence you’ll no doubt spend idling around the mansion before the ceremony.

On the way back, the sky is black underneath a cladding of clouds. Ash as far as the eye can see. The stars are hiding, but you lean your cheek against the car window and look up as if trying to spot them, anyway.

Lost in your mind, your own musings holding you close as the bag sits atop your lap, you don’t pay much attention to the boys when they ask if you wanna stop somewhere to eat because they’re getting munchy.

Without looking, though, you do tell them ‘no thanks, you’re getting kind of sleepy’ and Kieran makes the turn home— albeit not without a dramatic sigh.

It’s… pleasant though, surprisingly. Being with them.

It’s like luck is finally shuffling over to your side. Like things are finally looking up- no matter how trife or trivial they seem. For as shitty of a week it’s turned out to be, you need all the silver linings you can get. So (although with some reluctance, some… confusion) you’ll count this time with them as a small blessing.

Maybe, just maybe, this impromptu trip to Linkon is finally taking a turn for the better. Maybe each and every one of your efforts to remain patient and open-minded and mature with your stepfamily have actually begun to pay off. Maybe you won’t be tearfully pulling hair from your scalp after all, driven mad.

The twins’ harmless griping is a backdrop you smile at as the gates of the estate come into view through the woody road.

In the warmer seasons, it’s a monolithic modern thing erected atop rolling lawns striped green. As it stands now, though, the courtyard is a dull, frosted sage, quiet and cold. The fountain will need to be turned off soon before everything freezes, before the snow comes. You vaguely wonder if one of the workers or bush trimmers that come along every week or two will remember before Sylus even gives them the order. It’s likely.

A thud. “Are you sure, sis?” Your door closes behind you.

Hand still on the wheel, Kieran waggles his eyebrows as his sibling hollers from the passenger seat, thinking you’ll take his lilts as an invitation to get back into the vehicle.

“I’m sure,” you murmur fondly, actually stopping at the driver’s window for a moment to hear them out. You adjust the plastic bag in your grasp and throw a look down the rest of the driveway, towards the house.

“You want us to bring something back, at least? We found this cool new place that opened up that has the best—“

A chuckle. “I’m alright, really. We had lunch and dinner together, ‘member?” Then, you give your throat a soft, innocuous clear, scuffing your shoes over the pavement. “By the way, uh… Do you think your dad’s home yet?”

With the garage closed, the path empty and only the lights you left on in the house warmly shining through, it’s hard to tell if anybody else has come by.

Kieran actually snickers at your hesitance, the little bastard.

You reach forward to flick his forehead and he reels away with an excited shout. “Calm down, sis, I didn’t even say anything!”

“Yeah, but I see you laughing you dummy-“

“It’s just cute, is all. You’re always so worried about our old man and what he’s up to.”

You huff at that, maybe even visibly fluster. But before you can say anything, hop to your own defense, a puckish voice overlaps yours. “If you were in a cartoon, you’d have steam coming out of your ears right now.”

“Ugh! You two are unbearable-!”

“Hey, Kieran said it, not me-“

“But you thought it, didn’t you? You two share the same handful of braincells after all!!”

They both laugh, more endeared by your insults than offended- much to your dismay- and you put your tongue in your cheek. Your narrowed eyes drift back to the titanic of a home. Maybe it’s your imagination, but you almost swear you see a shadow flutter by one of the floor-to-ceiling windows on the bottom level and—

“Did you see that?” You untuck your arms from their weave at your chest and squint. The boys, still sniggering, follow your gaze. “I think he is home.”

A beat of silence passes.

You turn over. Luke faces ahead in his seat, wetting his lip wordlessly, but Kieran dangles his arm out the side of the fancy, sleek car (that his father surely bought for him as a toy) with his eyes set on you.

Holding your gaze with a shake of his head, his smirk is a tenuous thing, but it’s there. “Nah, I’m pretty sure he’s gone, sis.”

If you ever write a guide on surviving the Qin family, the first page would say: step one, do not believe the twins if they utter anything even a stone’s throw from the two words—

“Don’t worry.”

You frown, uncertain.

He laughs at your pouting. “Kieran- just tell me the truth-“

“I’m serious! He’ll be back later tonight, probably midnight. You know how it is. His schedule is spotty.”

A wind sweeps through and you shiver ever so slightly, clasping either of your arms as you hug them close to your body. Your lips are getting that uncomfortable dry feeling but you know it’ll only worsen if you run your tongue over them. So you don’t.

You eye the lavish, yet unassuming front of the home, ruminating. “Kieran-“

“Now go back in before you catch a cold. Dad will really kill me and Luke if he finds out you were standing out in the dark just to bicker with us.”

“I’m innocent in this,” his brother murmurs before exaggerating a yawn.

You analyze the crafty duo one more time before sensing no dupe on their end and sighing, marching up towards the house.

“Fine,” you call over your shoulder, just a little testy. You don’t want to be fooled, but there isn’t a big reason for them to lie about whether their dad’s returned or not- and even if he did make it back already, it’s no major thorn in your side. There’s a fat chance you’ll just casually, quietly, pass him by as you head to your room- and that’s even if you bump into him in the first place. The place isn’t exactly small or conducive to chance meetings.

“But if you’re lying,” you start, before blushing because you can’t quite think of a good threat. “You’ll- you’ll regret it.”

The engine purrs and the car pulls off- thank God- carrying the harmless yet bothersome mocking words of your stepbrothers with it. “Ohhhh so scary! See you later!”

You cluck your tongue, shaking your head at no annoyance of theirs in particular as you hop up the steps and fish for the key in your pocket.

Giggling under your breath. Idiots.

✦

You’re not giggling when you enter the open foyer, locking the door behind you, and spot a figure in the living room, splayed out on the large L-shaped sofa.

No, you’re not even thinking about the boys anymore, just the dilemma laid out before you as you press your lips together in a thin line and turn your feet into feathers to begin making your way through.

God’s hand must be over your life though, because upon closer, very furtive inspection, tiptoeing towards the archway, he’s…

Asleep.

You let out a soundless sigh of relief at that, shoulders slumping.

…And you should take the opportunity- glad it’s even come to you- and go, you know. It’s as good a moment as any to slip off, undetected, and retreat into the privacy of your bedroom.

It’s all but waiting for you.

What you told the twins was as much of a truth as it was a good excuse— you’re tired and it’s encroaching on that time where you want to plop into bed and curl up under the covers.

Not because it’s past your curfew or anything, no- honestly, you usually have a penchant to stay up late- but because you’re still a little jet-lagged from the flight and you’d prefer to sleep instead of loaf the evening through with the unwanted company of whatever thoughts that might creep in.

You’re not… incredibly close with Sylus. Unbidden feelings of safety and peace in his presence nudged aside, you’re not chummy with the guy and you really have no reason to stick around especially when you’re growing tired but—

Approaching the archway, you slowly reach a hand to rest on it, and you watch.

A half-touched mug of coffee sits on the table before the couch. Strewn beside it is his laptop, mousepad and mouse, and one of those yellow, lined notebooks that you quirk a brow at only because it’s deceptively cheap for a man so expensive.

It’s closer to something your own father- your real, now deceased one- would use to mark out measurements for his woodworking projects, or keep on the fridge under a magnet as a note to himself.

…Huh.

A mite amused by the sight of your generally very awake, proactive stepfather, you fight off a grudging smile- all too entertained by the languid display- and rest your shoulder against the wall.

Dim, golden lights fall over him in a gentle haze, but the shadow cut by his bumped nose is sharp.

You know they’re not related, Sylus and his unruly sons. The twins are splitting images of each other, but they mirror nothing of Sylus’s face— so when you heard the casual murmurs between him and your mother behind closed doors one evening about their ‘adoption’ long ago, you shouldn’t have been surprised. Yet you were.

For as much as you disliked him, it was never because he was a bad father.

The opposite, if you’re completely honest.

He’s always been good to the boys. Nothing short of nurturing (in his own indirect way, of course), paternal, and teacherly. Offering a hand of guidance where it was needed but never ironlike or suffocating with how he used it. If anything, he was even a smidgen lax with them- which you’d quietly admire but only in absolute secret.

Every parent has their faults, that’s a given.

Sylus had very little.

A head full of silver (and some grey, albeit it’s hard to notice his age just because he handles it so gracefully, so boldly) tipped against the back of the couch with an arm resting on the side of it- the shaggy throw blanket on his lap with the wintry chill kept in mind— he’s more than just peaceful. He’s…

Domestic. Relaxed.

This is his territory, you’re reminded again.

You’re just passing through it.

A five o’clock shadow dots the slant of his jaw. His lashes don’t even flutter in his sleep; you reckon he’s deep into it. A pen hangs between his fingers, limp.

Interest dashes through you as you quietly observe him.

You’re not… spying, per se, it’s just- You’re just curious, alright? And to be fair, he wouldn’t have any right to call you out on your observation even if he wanted to, because the number of times you’ve felt and ignored his patient, hopeful, or outright (for whatever reason) amazed stare is too high to be logged.

A pair of glasses rests on the tip of his nose, sloping off. There’s no way to tell just when he got home, but it’s obvious he had been hard at work with something on his computer.

Humming thoughtfully, you pull your gaze away before sluggishly pushing off the threshold.

You shake your head at yourself, readjusting your bag as you find the trace of humor in your desultory actions. Why you let your curiosity get the better of you, you don’t know. It’s very possible at this point that something’s possessed you. Either that, or your cold, guarded heart is thawing out at rates National Geographic needs to get an angle on ASAP.

In any case- you really ought to head up for bed now.

Quiet as a mouse, careful lest you wake and alert him to your presence, you pad behind the couch and across the width of the massive living room to the just as opulent stairs.

You look up to them—

Looming. Dark.

In your mind’s eye, so unrealistically steep- so dangerous—

Breath suddenly hitching, you glance down to your feet, planted firmly beneath you- unmoving- and remind yourself of good things. Other, things.

Puppies. Kittens. Rainbows with pots of gold waiting at the other end with leprechauns to greedily guard them- varying flights of fancy.

Awfully enough, in all your attempts to distract and soothe yourself, four portraits pop up into your brain and three of them belong to none other than your stepfamily.

You want to be callous. But it’s not working this time around.

This wound of yours that your mother’s death left behind is too open, too fleshy, for you to pretend that your skin is so hardened.

Reopening your eyes, you swallow down the bad gut feeling that twists like a knife- the inexplicable unease disappearing as quickly as it came- and reach a hand for the railing.

Bed. Bed. Clearly, you need the rest—

“Kitten?”

A groggy voice. That, and a shuffle.

You flip around.

You’re too shocked to even remember you’re meant to dislike him, hand flying over your heart in a trice. “Y-Yeah?”

Your stepfather, looking sideward over the couch at you, blinks away sleep casually.

Oh, God. It’s just him…

“Oh,” he mumbles, “Sorry, Sweetie. I didn’t mean to scare you…” lazily tossing a glance to the unoccupied space around him, even the banister overhead; checking for something, you realize as your heart slowly takes its foot out from your throat.

You sigh out, visibly deflating.

You think you see his gaze drop to the bag in your hand, giving you a once-over, but his ruby eyes are catching the light in a way that makes it near impossible to discern. You can only tell he’s looking at you because he’s facing you.

“Where’s the boys? You left with them, didn’t you?”

Your lashes bounce against your cheekbone, rapid as you collect your bearings. “Oh, they…”

His tone gets a little stern, then, his eyes a little clearer now as he dips his chin and quirks a searching brow. Incredulous, very. “Is… everything alright? They behaved themselves, didn’t they?”

“Yeah, no- the boys were fine,” you shake your head, rubbing nothing from your eye. Fatigue, maybe, as it drapes itself over you. It takes a second for you to remember the events that led you here before opening your mouth to speak on them. “Um, they just wanted to get a snack and I wanted to be dropped off, so…”

He takes a moment to ponder that.

Unconvinced, “But everything went well?” His attention skims over you hastily. You see that, now. The intense glitter in his eye, wholly transfixed, as the dregs of his slumber wear off- however, the gravel in his voice is more stubborn to go.

He sighs, long-suffering. “You can tell me. I won’t let them know it was you.”

You struggle to imagine how that would go, but shake your head in the next moment anyway.

“Really, it was fine. Everything went well.”

“Good.” He hums, then, seemingly satisfied.

He pores over you, curious all over again as a tiny bunch forms between his brow, wrinkling it slightly. “You’re… heading up for the night now, I guess?”

Oh, yes actually, you think to yourself in time with his reminding you of it- but you go to reply and hold off on it when he glances down at what you correctly assume to be his wristwatch, pausing thoughtfully.

“Oh, my. It’s gotten pretty late out now,” he drawls. “Hm. I must’ve drifted off while I was waiting for-”

You quirk a brow. “Ah. Waiting for this spreadsheet to get interesting,” he smoothly chuckles, looking at the screen of his computer and the low battery sign that pops up as a window on it.

Before you can think to respond- “Goodnight then, Kitten,” he lilts as high as his sleep-addled voice will allow, “I’ll see you in the morning. Should I,” a pause again, “wake you for breakfast?”

You swallow, momentarily glancing at the top landing of the stairs. “No thanks.”

“Are you sure?” He breathes.

Persistence is needed in business, you know that; it’s why you don’t hold it against him when his first instinct is to push rather than pull away. His realm is different than yours. And anyway, he’s just being polite— playing the part of the concerned, doting, yet nonetheless hesitant stepfather who is terribly uncertain with how to best handle his grouchy stepdaughter. He does it well.

“You’re not afraid of missing out?”

You offer a mildly amused huff, choosing to indulge him just this once- just for these two weeks. “On my sleep, maybe.”

He chuckles. It’s a full and rich sound. There’ll come a day where Luke and Kieran will coax more of the same out of him, and you’ll give them genuine, congratulatory claps on the back each for the achievement.

For now, though, that feat is yours and yours alone. Not that you’re… exactly proud of it.

“Alright, alright, I get the hint, little miss night owl… I won’t disturb you tomorrow. You have my word.” He smirks just barely. Just safe enough.

“Sleep tight, Sweetie.”

The ice is melting between you both, yes- a phenomenon you both curiously, warily observe— but he will watch his step.

You set your foot on the first stair, “T-Thanks. You too.”

…As will you.

tags: @leftpoetrymoon @valhalla-soulstealer @gingybimby @crowsandapples @novthirty @mcdepressed290 @jadeloverxd @satansdaughter123 @blitziwitch @luminaaaz @eialovescats @noliniodeaes @dramaticalsachan @loudhologramturtle @softiepeachess @reni502 @datfangirl @lilyalone @thatsbunnysmind @lioria @floooring @babyx91 @rosie279 @calistaxoxo24 @kingheinrey @msturi2u @theplaid-wearingmoose @blueseachelle @themonotonysyndrome @crazyartist0001-blog @librarydame @deathlycrow @whdhjfjvjvjfjdhsj ✦ ask to be added to taglist! please just have an age in ur bio (17+) ✨likes & reblogs are super appreciated my friends🫰thank u again for the support thus far!! C:

[straylightdream]

APT. 847b

𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭: yoon jeonghan x camgirl! reader

Having sex with your roommate normally complicates things. What happens when being with Jeonghan just makes sense?

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: roommates to lovers, friends with benefits??, soulmate au?? non idol au

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: camgirl reader, camboy jeonghan, lots of emotions, they’re both very down bad for each other and don’t realize it. Smut warning below the cut.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7.5k

an: this story switches between jeonghan and the readers pov. It will be label by his name and her, when the pov is switching. This is a part of my little universe of loosely connected SVT stories called all for you. Thank you @whimsical-whatever for helping me figure out this story.

𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: multiple sex scenes, camgirl reader, camboy jeonghan, soft dom/switch jeonghan, voyerism, masturbation, mutal masturbation, oral (male rec), sex toys, dirty talk, nipple play, squirting, unprotected sex, cream-pie, breeding kink, cum play, sex tapes, cam boy jeonghan??, lots of emotions, tipsy sex (they’re both fully consenting), caming, filming sexual acts, slut shaming (not by any of the boys. The mc refers to herself as one). names: hers (baby, good girl, angel), his (baby, hannie)

-JEONGHAN-

Jeonghan was tired of being one of the few single people in his friend group. He had zero desire to try online dating like a few friends and all his friends that were girls were already dating one of the other guys in his friend group. He thought maybe if he had a girlfriend or someone for companionship he wouldn’t feel like something is missing in his life.

-

Looking at his computer at the kitchen table his brain was hurting looking at all his banking info. It was coming up on that time if the month when rent was due. Since Jihoon moved out to move in with his girlfriend, Jeonghan and his other roommate Kitten decided to just split the amount of the whole apartment instead of finding another roommate. This was working out but now it’s been six months and Jeonghan is tired of spending so much on rent.

Kitten walked in the door with groceries in hand. She instantly noticed how stressed Jeonghan looked.

“What’s up?” She asked as she set some groceries on the table.

“I think we need to get a roommate. I can’t keep paying this much for rent.”

“Okay that works for me. I just request we maybe find a girl roommate. Also we should probably tell her right away about my job.” Jeonghan assumed Kitten would want a girl roommate. With her being a cam girl he knew having a random man she didn’t know living with them could make things weird. “Wait. Would it be weird if I asked one of my friends I met through Cherry moved in?”

“Is she a camgirl?” Honestly Jeonghan didn’t care what Kitten did for a living. He also didn’t care if another girl who did the same job moved in.

“Yeah she is.”

“That’s fine with me.”

-HER-

Your last roommate you had started making you uncomfortable after finding out about your job. You were in desperate need of a new place to live.

One day when you were out to lunch with Cherry she mentioned having friends that were looking for a roommate. She mentioned one of them being Kitten, a fellow camgirl. You knew right then that would be a good place to live.

You’ve been living with Jeonghan and Kitten for four months now. You and Kitten were already friends and your first reaction when you met Jeonghan was that he's absolutely beautiful.

You learned very quickly they’re both amazing roommates. Jeonghan keeps the apartment very tidy and Kitten loves cooking for you guys. Kitten’s boyfriend Joshua is often at the apartment. He’s best friends with Jeonghan so he’ll even come over just to hang out with him even if Kitten is busy.

You work at a tech company as a software programmer during the day and at night you stream to make extra money. Work has been absolutely shitty recently and this week all your deadlines have been driving you insane. After getting yelled at by your boss you can’t wait to get home. The moment you walk through the door you instantly notice how quiet the apartment is. Opening your phone you see a text sent to your roommate group chat.

5:32pm

From Kitten <3: I’m not coming home tonight. I’m staying at Shau’s place. I made pasta for lunch and I made you each a container. They’re in the fridge for you.

From Jeonghan: thank you. I’m heading home soon. I carpooled with Hao to work.

From you: if anyone needs me I’m getting wine drunk. I had a shitty day at work.

5:37pm

From Jeonghan: don’t get wasted before I get there. I’ll get wine drunk with you.

Walking into the apartment Jeonghan finds you sitting on the couch in your pajamas with a large glass of wine in your hands. You’re dressed in a pair of sweatpants and an oversized shirt.

Jeonghan sits his work bag down by the door and slips off his shoes.

“That’s a lot of wine,” he says walking closer to you.

“I had a shitty day,” you raise your glass at him.

“Let me get out of this work clothes.” He heads off to his room and comes back in a pair of sweats and baggy shirt.

He heads off to the kitchen and comes back with a wine glass for himself. He pours himself a big glass of red wine and sits down next to you.

“Am I crazy if I quit my tech job?” This week feels like it’s been absolutely eating you alive trying to maintain your nine to five job. You take another big drink of wine.

“Not necessarily. I don’t know how inappropriate this is to ask but do you make enough on your lives to afford to get by?” You know Jeonghan is one of the few people you can have that conversation with. He knows all about how being a full time camgirl works because of Kitten.

“Honestly I make enough to live comfortably. In all reality if I quit my tech job I could probably focus more on streaming and making my subscribers only page make even more money.” You’ve been thinking about this for a while, you've just never mentioned it to anyone.

“You’re pretty miserable at your tech job aren’t you?” He’s seen you so stressed out you started crying last week. Jeonghan is very aware of how much you hate your job.

“I fucking hate it,” you sigh.

“If you think you make enough steaming, I say do it. If you have a rough month with money. I can help you figure out rent.” Jeonghan has been so nice to you since the moment you met him. You can’t believe he’s willing to help you with money if things get tough.

“I’m gonna tell them Monday I’m quitting,” you can’t help but smile.

“I think you’re going to be so much happier.”

Taking a big sip of wine you instantly feel relieved. You can’t wait to no longer work a nine to five job.

“Did you already heat up Kitten’s food she made for us?”

“No.”

Reaching over his pats your thigh, and lets out a soft laugh. “Maybe we should eat something before we drink our weight in red wine.”

Getting up he goes into the kitchen and starts warming up the food your roommate left. Sitting at the kitchen table you pour yourself another large glass of wine. He places the food on the table in front of you. Before sitting down across from you.

The food is absolutely delicious. Just like it always is when Kitten makes anything.

“Did you wanna watch something in the living room together?” He asked picking up your empty bowl.

“Sure.”

Sitting back down on the couch you take another big drink of wine before sitting your glass down on the coffee table. Jeonghan turns on a drama he’s been watching before he gets comfortable next to you on the couch. It’s not uncommon for you to practically cuddle leaning against each other on the couch.

His arm is over your shoulder as you lean against him. The whole time his show is playing you aren’t really paying attention. Even the red wine can’t seem to stop your over thinking about work. Without even thinking you pick the little lent pieces that are on the thigh if Jeonghan’s sweats. He doesn’t say anything but you feel his thigh flex under your touch.

He takes a deep breath. Glancing up you see he’s no longer watching the tv, he’s eyes are trained on you.

“Sorry,” you pulled your hand away feeling instantly embarrassed.

He doesn’t say anything, he just stares at you blinking. The air feels heavy. Without even thinking you go back to playing with the fabric of his sweats. Your hand travels towards the inside of his thighs almost testing the waters. The sound of him swallowing loudly tells you you’re playing a dangerous game.

“Do you want me to stop?” You whisper not even sure if your voice is fully audible. Maybe it’s the red wine in your veins making you bold enough to make a move on your roommate.

“No,” he voice is clear as day.

Your hand slides up his thigh. The growing bulge in his sweatpants is a clear indicator that he’s enjoying this. “Can I touch you?”

“Yes.”

Slowly your hand slides up his thigh. Stopping just at his bulge. Your eyes stay locked on his as you cup his bulge. He’s a little bigger than average size by the feel of it. A low moan passes his lips as you feel him up.

Your eyes stayed locked on him as you groped him. He’s so hard in your hand and straining against his sweatpants.

“Hannie,” you whisper.

“Yes?”

“Are you sober?” You want to make sure he’s fully aware of what is happening.

“I was barely tipsy. Are you sober?” He looks so gentle suddenly.

“I’m just tad tipsy.” You don’t stop touching him as you speak. “But I want this.” You have thought about touching him for weeks.

“Can I please kiss you?”

“Please.”

Without another word he removes your hand from him and pulls your pilant body on to his lap. His straining erection is pressed up against your clothed core. Resting his hand on your cheek he drags his thumb across your bottom lip. Rolling your hips against his for some friction, a soft moan passes your lips.

The first time your lips touch in a tipsy state it feels sobering. The feeling of Jeonghan’s soft lips against yours gives you butterflies. He’s holding your face in his hands slowly he pulls away and smiles at you.

“I have wanted to kiss you for a while.” His voice is low. There’s no words you can think say. Crashing your lips into his once again for a heated kiss.

“I wondered what it was like to kiss you.” His hands grip your hips and guide your body against his. After your shitty day at work you didn’t think it would end with you dry humping your roommate while you make out.

“You’re so fucking hot,” he groans as his lips start kissing your jaw.

Rolling your hips against his erection you can feel your panties starting to stick to your wet core. “Hannie, can you fuck me?” You moan.

Pulling away from you, he rolls his head back moaning. “I want to so badly.”

Crawling off his lap you quickly remove your sleep shorts and your wet panties. His eyes stay locked on your pussy. It is clearly wet with need. You hope he doesn’t mind that you aren’t shaved bare. Since you started streaming you realized you didn’t need to wax all the time. Men tended to like you like that. He swallows watching you for a moment before he takes this as his cue to remove his sweats and boxers.

The sight of his cock is absolutely mouth watering. His cock is just as pretty as you thought it would be. It’s a little bigger than the average man. It’s a pretty blush color, and curves up towards him. The base of him has a well kept patch of pubes with a little happy trail.

Crawling onto his lap you nestle his length between your folds.

“Can I take this off?” He messes with the hem of your baggy shirt.

“Yes,” you sigh.

He pulls off your shirts and marvels at the fact you aren’t wearing a bra. “Can you take yours off?” Silently he follows your request.

You’re both completely naked sitting on your living room coach. Rolling your hips, his cock slides through your folds. Everytime his mushroom tip brushes your clit you can’t help but gasp.

“Should I get a condom?” He moans taking your breast in his hand. His hands knead your flesh.

“I’m clean and have an iud.”

“Where did you want me to finish?” He plays with your nipples, tweaking them between two fingers.

“Wherever you want. I would prefer you fill me up.”

“Are you asking me to come inside you?” He looks completely caught off guard by your request.

“Please,” you practically beg.

“Okay baby.”

Your lips move together as you slowly sink down on his length. Your fingers tangle in his blonde hair holding him close. Lifting your hips you keep a slow pace. Each time you roll your hips forward you clit brushes against his pubic bone earning a moan.

Your nose brushes his as your lips are so close to touching. The only sounds in the room are the soft moans, and pants. His lips connect to your neck leaving open mouth kisses.

The way his cock is curved his brushing against the spot inside you that has you seeing stars.

“You feel so good,” he moans. “You’re so tight.”

As you move your body up and down his length you can’t really think straight. You're lost in a lust filled haze. It feels like he was made for you. His cock hits the perfect spot inside of you.

The coil in your stomach tightens more and more with each thrust. His hands grip your sides helping you move. Suddenly the coil snaps and a white hot wave washes over you.

Moaning his name like a prayer. He starts lifting his hips helping you ride out your orgasm.

-JEONGHAN-

“Can I cum inside you?” He begs. He’s desperate and sounds like he’s on the verge of falling apart.

“Please fill me up.”

His hands grip your hips as he chases his release. Your walls contract around him as another orgasm follows, milking his cock. Thick white ropes fill you to the brim. He doesn’t think he’s ever come this much in his life. Looking into your eyes for a moment he feels like this was supposed to happen. He doesn’t know how he ever was to survive not touching you.

-HER-

You stop moving, leaning against him. Your face rest in the crook of his neck. You press open mouth wet kisses to the delicate skin on his neck.

“That was unexpected.” Gently he rubs your back.

“That was amazing.” You murmured against his skin.

“I need to clean you up and make sure my cum doesn’t get on the couch. Kitten might kill us if we stained this couch.”

Standing up your legs feel like jello. Looking down between your legs you watch as Jeonghan cum starts trickling down your thigh. Without even thinking his grabs his shirt and gently wipes away his release. Grabbing your hand he takes you to the bathroom where he sits you on the counter and wipes way any cum that is leaking out.

Standing between you legs his hand rest on your cheek. “You’re so pretty.”

“You sure know how to make a girl feel good.”

“The only girl I have ever wanted to make feel good is you.” Leaning forward he presses his lips to yours for a gentle kiss.

Everything feels like it makes sense right now. There isn’t any awkward tension or any feelings of regret. He helps you off the counter and without even asking takes you to his room. He pulls you close to his body and presses another kiss to your forehead.

- JEONGHAN-

“Can I ask you something that might be a little too intrusive?”

You’re naked in his bed you aren’t sure what he could possibly be worried about asking you. “Go for it?”

“What kind of stuff do you film?”

“You’ve never looked up my account?” You’ve mentioned your username before. You just kinda assumed he would investigate. Some of your other friends have. Hell even your last roommate did.

“Never. I’ve never looked up Kitten or Cherry either. It just felt like an invasion of privacy. Also I don’t think it’s really fair to Shau or Jun if I looked up their partners.”

“Do you think any of the boys have looked me up?” Jeonghan's whole friend group basically knows about your job. You found out when Cherry started seeing Jun she slowly let the friend group know and Kitten’s secret had slowly gotten out as well as she felt more comfortable letting close friends know.

“No none of them have. They all just see it as a normal job.”

“I film a lot of solo stuff with toys. I back in the day used to film with this guy I was casually seeing but he never fucked me on camera. I just used to film giving him head. Things with us ended when he got a serious girlfriend.”

“Would you ever film with someone again?” He can’t lie, he's curious. He is one of the only people Jun has told about filming with girlfriend. He knows Jun films with Cherry all the time but makes sure his face is never seen.

“I wouldn’t be against it. It has to be the right person. I need to make sure I trust them.”

He looks up at the ceiling. He doesn’t know why he’s suddenly so interested in the possibility of filming with you. He’s never had a desire to preform sexual acts in camera. But there is something about you that he’s interested in doing it with you.

“Would you trust me?”

Knitting your brows together you stare at him for a long moment. “I do trust you.” Lacing his fingers with yours he squeezes your hand gently. “Did you want to film with me?”

“I’m quite interested.”

“Have you talked to Jun?”

“Yeah he told me about his anonymous filming he does. It piqued my interest, but I don’t want you to think I slept with you because of that.” He’s suddenly worried you’re going to think he’s a creep.

“Last time I checked I started this when I was messing with your sweatpants,” you let out a little laugh. “If you were interested in filming with me. We could try whatever you’re comfortable doing.”

“I think I want to try at least once.”

-HER-

When morning comes you're reminded you’re in Jeonghan bed when you feel his morning wood poking your butt. His arm tights around your waist letting you know he’s awake.

“Hannie.”

“Baby,” he groans, pushing his dick further against your butt. His hand moved down your stomach. His hand cups your pussy. His finger dips between your folds earning a moan. “I want you again,” he groans.

“You can have me,” you moan.

“Are you going to put it in?”

“Do you want me to fuck you again?”

“Please, Hannie.”

He pushes your leg forward to give himself better access to your core. “Do I need to get a condom?”

“No want you raw,” you moan. He’s grinding against your core, making you feel like you’re going insane.

Slowly he pushes into you. He’s hitting a different angle than last night. “This might be the best way to wake up,” he groans. “You feel even tighter from this angle.”

It doesn’t take long before you fall apart moaning his name. The feeling of him finishing inside you is intoxicating. You understand why people have creampie kink. You’ve never fucked anyone on camera before, but now you can’t get the thought of Jeonghan fucking you on camera out of your mind.

Walking out of Jeonghan room dressed in a pair of his sweats and baggy shirt. He takes your hand in his before pressing his lips to your cheek.

“Hannie?”

“Yeah?”

“Maybe we don’t tell Kitten right away. Especially if we’re gonna film together.”

“Okay that works for me.”

-

You have officially quit your job and have decided to fully focus on being a camgirl.

After that night you and Jeonghan first slept together things between you have definitely changed. It feels like you’re definitely together but you’re sneaking around. Neither of you are ready for Kitten to know or any of your friends. You haven’t had a chance to film together yet, but Jeonghan sat in your room last night while you were filming. He sat on the other side of the camera. His hand stroking his length mimicking the speed you’re thrusting your sparkly blue dildo into yourself.

Him being in the room while you’re filming is absolutely thrilling. It’s intoxicating knowing that no one knows what’s happening other than the two of you.

After filming you always take a nice hot shower and the addition of Jeonghan joining you is welcomed. He massages mango scented shampoo into your hair.

“I like watching you film,” he says, breaking the comfortable silence that has formed between you.

“I liked you watching.”

“Did you still wanna go out to the bar with Seungcheol, Darling, Honey, Wonwoo, Chan and Minghao?”

“Oh yeah I’ll go. I think Shau is coming over here. Kitten mentioned wanting to film. We could give them some privacy.” He taps your butt signaling for you to turn around to rinse your hair.

You spend the rest of the shower not doing anything sexual. Jeonghan finishes washing your hair, and you help wash his hair before getting out. Each of you go to your seperate room to get dressed and get ready to go out.

Walking out into the living room you find Joshua sitting on the couch talking to Jeonghan. Kitten pops out of the kitchen holding a bottle of water.

“Are you guys meeting Cheol at the bar?” Joshua asked.

“Yeah Cheol was saying it’s been too long since we all met up for beers.”

“(Y/N) are you going?” Kitten asked.

“Yeah Jeonghan said we can use this to celebrate me being free from my job.”

“That means you should get wasted. Hannie can take care of you,” Joshua says, patting your roommate on the shoulder.

“Hannie take care of our girl,” Kitten says as she walks over and holds her hand out signaling her boyfriend to stand up.

“I always take care of her,” Jeonghan’s words have a double meaning that neither of them catch.

Jeonghan drives you to the bar telling you that he would be designated driver that you could let loose and have fun.

As soon as you arrive Darling and Honey pull you away saying they want to do shots to celebrate you quitting.

-JEONGHAN-

Standing at the bar Jeonghan is ordering himself a beer, and you a drink. Seungcheol walks up patting him on the back.

“I’m glad you brought (Y/N) with you. Darling and Honey seem to love her.” Seungcheol says before taking a sip of his beer.

“She’s great. She just quit her tech job so I told her this would be a good way to celebrate.” The bartender puts two drinks down in front of him, and Jeonghan hands him his card to pay.

“I take it that means she’s going to work full time doing the same thing as Kitten and Cherry?” It’s funny all the boys know now that Kitten and Cherry are camgirl but they’re all really respectful about it and never directly say what their jobs is.

“Yeah she makes good money doing it. She was absolutely miserable at her tech job. I can’t count the number of times she came home crying from work.” Jeonghan hated seeing you upset.

“You know I think she’s a good fit for the group. She gets along with all boys and the girls adore her. It’s a bonus that she understands and relates to Kitten and Cherry.” Seungcheol says.

“I think with Jun seeing Cherry and her being open about her job made Kitten feel more comfortable letting everyone know.” Jeonghan remembers when Kitten awkwardly told him about her job. She seemed so worried that Jeonghan would be upset or judge her, but he honestly didn’t care. He’s always been a very sex positive person, and if his roommate could make a living being a cam girl he would never judge her. He wouldn’t ever judge you either. Your job didn’t define you. He was quite interested in your job though, and wanted to explore aspects of it with you.

Seungcheol clears his throat, catching his attention. “You zoned out on me.”

“Sorry I was just thinking.” He stares at his drink before taking a sip.

“Why don’t you go take (Y/N) her drink?”

Walking over he interrupts your conversation with the girls to hand your drink. He wants to give you time to catch up with the girls. Walking over he joins Wonwoo and Minghao at the pool table.

The moment Chan joins the boys at the pool table he’s already in full gear complaining about his coworker. Jeonghan gets an earful about the new girl that is making Chan’s life, as he says “a living hell.” That’s probably because they’re competing for the same promotion.

Minghao just shakes his head before taking a drink of his beer. Seungcheol soon joins the rest of the boys after bugging his girlfriend who seems more interested in catching up with the girls.

The whole time boys are playing pool he can’t seem to fully focus on the game. He keeps glancing over at you.

“You’re not nearly as competitive tonight as you normally are,” Wonwoo bumps him. Jeonghan glances up at his friend. He’s trying to be subtle about the fact he can only focus on you.

“I got a lot on my mind.”

“Maybe, your roommate can help with that.”

“Wonwoo-“

“I’m just messing with you. I know you’ve had a crush for a while.”

“Let’s not talk about this,” Jeonghan doesn’t need any of the boys in his business. Especially since he hasn’t properly talked about what is going on between you.

The girls rush over with a tray of shots. Jeonghan passes on taking one knowing he needs to drive you home. He watches as everyone toast to you quitting your job.

As the night goes on Jeonghan watches as you, Chan, and Darling get absolutely wasted. Honey is quite drunk but nowhere on the level of the others. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen you this drunk. There is something so cute about how fluster you get in this drunken state.

Seungcheol is taking care of his girlfriend who is even more clingy than normal.

Chan is fighting with Wonwoo about not wanting to go home.

“I need to take Chan home,” Wonwoo says, holding the wrist of his very drunk friend.

“I’ll ride with you guys to help,” Minghao chimes in.

“Wonwoo, can you hold my hand?” Honey asked, walking up to her boyfriend.

“I need to get my own drunk one back to my place,” Seungcheol says, holding his girlfriend’s hand.

Leaning into Jeonghan you wrap your arms around his waist holding him. “Hannie, are you going to take me home?”

He leans down pressing his lips to the top of your head, “yes, angel.”

Taking your hand he leads out of the bar and helps you into his car. After buckling you in he starts heading home. Leaning your head against the cool glass window. Reaching over he rests his hand on your thigh.

“Hannie?”

“Yes angel?”

“Thank you,” you murmur, sounding like you’re trying not to fall asleep.

“For what?” He glances over at you trying to focus on the road.

“For being my person.”

“You’re my person too,” he gently squeezes your thigh.

Arriving home he helps you into the elevator. He notices the apartment is quite quiet but he can hear the sound of music lightly playing in Kitten’s room.

“Your bed or mine?” He asked.

“Mine but will you sleep with me? I wanna cuddle.” He had zero intention of letting you sleep alone. In your drunken state he wanted to make sure you were safe.

“Of course.”

He leads you off to the bathroom where he sits you on the toilet and uses one of your makeup wipes and helps you clean your face. Once in your room he helps you strip down to just your underwear. He even helps you remove your bra you were complaining about. He hands you a baggy shirt he knows you love to sleep in. He doesn’t bother going to his room to get his pajama pants. He strips down to his boxers and joins you under the covers.

Curling up on your side he can tell you’re barely awake. He turns off the light on the nightstand on his side of the bed. He curls up behind you spooning you. This is quite possibly his favorite way to fall asleep. He is never more comfortable than when he is holding you.

“Night Hannie,” you whisper.

“Goodnight baby.”

He doesn’t fall asleep as quickly as you. He can’t seem to shut off his mind. He doesn’t understand how one person can make him feel so many emotions like you do.

When sleep finally finds him, he only dreams of you.

-HER-

It’s been two months since the first time you slept together, the first of many times. Since then Jeonghan has brought up filming with you a few times. Recently he’s been enjoying being in the room masturbating with you off screen.

Today is the day he finally asked if he could officially go on your stream with you.

“Maybe pull your hair back so it looks short and wear a face mask in case any of you face shows.” You think it’s best if he stays anonymous as possible. Especially if it ends up being a one time thing.

“Okay.” He works on pulling his hair back.

“If you don’t want to do this I fully understand,” you want to give him an opportunity to back out.

“I want to do this.”

“How do you want to do this?” You need to know what his boundaries are. You’re willing to do anything he feels comfortable doing. You know with Junhui and Cherry he stays fully dressed and plays with her on camera. She’s mentioned they filmed a full sex tape before but she decided against posting it. You aren’t sure if you would ever feel comfortable posting one of those, but if you trust anyone enough to film a full sex tape it would be Jeonghan.

“Maybe the first time you give me head and I’ll finger you.” He seems a little nervous and you don’t blame him. Your first time you went live you were nervous too.

“I’m going to suggest you talk dirty to me while I give you head. People eat that up.”

Jeonghan sits on the bed and you make sure the camera isn’t showing his face. You adjust the camera so no matter where he sits it should only show him from the neck down.

You start your stream and sit on the bed next to him. You’re dressed in a see through lavender bra and crotchless panties.

You greet your audience and tell them you have a mystery friend helping you. All the comments are instantly excited that you have brought someone to film with you. Some of the requests people are leaving are asking him to do wild things to you.

Leaning over you whisper in his ear, “act like it’s just us two.”

He nods silently. Standing up he removes his underwear and sits on the chair angled in front of the camera. The angle makes it where you only see the bottom of his jaw that is covered by a mask. Slowly he strokes his length as you crawl towards him.

“Such a pretty cock,” you say as you sit on your knees in front of him. The sight of him naked on the chair in front of you is mouth watering.

Putting his hand under your chin he tilts your head up. “Are you going to be a good girl for me and suck it?”

“I want you to fuck my mouth.” He groans at your dirty words. You never talk like this to him when you’re fooling around.

Sticking your tongue out you stare at him through your lashes. Tapping his dick against your tongue. You smile as he pulls away. Neither of you are normally like this in bed together and this kind of feels like you’re role playing. This whole scenario is exciting.

“Open,” he commands.

Placing the tip of his dick in your mouth you instantly start sucking him. His dark eyes stay locked on you as you focus on taking him further in your mouth. One hand rests on his thigh steadying yourself while the other pumps his neglected shaft. Your focus is on his sensitive tip right now.

Hollowing your cheeks you take him all the way in. Thank god you don’t really have a gag reflex as he brushes the back of your throat. Looking up at him with watery eyes you wish you could see his whole face. His hands brush your hair away from your face. Making a makeshift ponytail with his hand.

“Such a good girl,” he moans.

He is not even touching you and he’s making you wet. You don’t think you’ve ever cum fully untouched, but today might be the day.

Popping off him you smile up at him taking this moment to properly breathe again. Taking his length in both hands you pump him and focus on his tip again. Tilting his head back he closes his eyes, taking a deep breath.

Taking him back into your mouth you take him until your nose brushes against his will trimmed patch of pubic hair. His stomach muscles tense as he’s on the brink of falling apart.

Pulling off him you look at him and say, “are you going to come in my mouth?”

“That depends, are you going to be a good girl and swallow?”

“Anything for you.”

Hollowing your cheeks you take him fully again. His fingers tangled in your hair helping guide you up and down his length. Your eyes are a watery mess as he keeps brushing the back of your throat. The echoing moan of the word “baby”’ takes over your senses as he feels your mouth with his milky release.

You keep sucking until he’s finished and clearly spent. Pulling off of him he rests his hand on your cheek. His thumb brushes your bottom lip wiping away some of his cum.

Opening your mouth you show him cum. You’ve never been a fan of swallowing, but you would do it everyday with him.

“Good girl,” he whispers. Closing your mouth you swallow everything he gave you.

“Can I play with your favorite vibrator?” He asked standing up. Walking off camera he grabs some tissues cleaning himself up.

“Please.”

“Lay on your bed and spread your legs wide for all the nice people to see.”

Crawling on the bed he sits on his knees next to you. Making sure your wet pussy is on full display for everyone watching. He’s attempting to make sure the only part of him that shows is his jaw that is covered by a mask.

Holding the vibrator to your already sensitive clit he starts by pumping one finger. Giving you a chance to adjust before he adds a second. He hooks his long fingers brushing your g spot over. Your body feels tense as the coil in your stomach tightens. At the rate he’s going you're going to fall apart the quickest you ever have.

“Is baby close to cumming?” He says staring into your lust filled eyes. You aren’t sure you can form proper words, you just nod your head.

“Can you take another finger?”

“Yes.”

He stretches you open more, adding another finger. He clicks up the speed of the vibrator practically making you scream.

Your orgasm hits you like a ton of bricks and for the first time ever fluid rushes out of you. Coating Jeonghan’s arm in your release. Your body feels weightless as you lay there trying to breathe.

Looking at Jeonghan you see his arm glistening. You’ve never squirted before and you weren’t even sure you could. Your cheeks instantly flush, feeling quite embarrassed.

“Such a good girl,” he pulls away from your core. He clicked off the vibrator tossing it on your bed.

“That’s all folks,” he walks over and ends your livestream.

Laying there you close your eyes staring up at the ceiling. Slowly sitting up you watch as he removes his face mask and pulls on his boxers before dashing out of your room. He comes back holding a washcloth.

“Baby spread your legs for me. I need to clean you up.”

The warm water cloth against your sensitive core is nice. “I’ve never squirted before.”

“Oh,” he instantly sports a cocky smile.

“I’m gonna need to clean my sheets.” You can’t even think about getting out of bed yet. Your body feels like jello.

“How about you take a shower and I’ll strip your bed and toss your bedding in the washer.”

“Can I sleep in your bed tonight?” Suddenly things feel very deeper between you and you honestly just want him to hold you.

He helps you stand up. He leans down and presses his lips to yours for a gentle kiss. “Of course you can stay in my bed.”

“What if Kitten sees us?” You ask the question that has been on your mind since this all started.

“We don’t have to hide anything. If she sees us I’m okay with that.”

Slowly you sit up and stare at him for a moment. You don’t think you can really keep your feelings out of whatever is happening between you. “Jeonghan, I like you a lot.”

“I like you a lot too. I actually more than like you.” His words instantly give you butterflies. “Go take a shower and we’ll talk more after. Come to my room after.”

Standing under the warm water you can’t seem to shut off your brain. Things suddenly feel so different, but that’s not a bad thing.

-JEONGHAN-

Three little words have been floating around in his head for a while now. He tries to stop thinking about it as he throws your bedding into the washer. When heads to his room he goes through his drawers finding something for you to sleep in. All he can do is picture your face as you lay on your bed completely blissed out.

The bedroom door opens and you walk in with a towel wrapped around you. “Is Kitten with Joshua?”

“Yeah they’re actually at her parents house for dinner.” He forgot to mention that earlier. “I picked out something for you to sleep in.”

“You don’t want to sleep naked?” You give him a smile.

“I mean we can if you want. I was thinking we could get cozy, and talk about some things.”

You take the clothes from him and get dressed, not bothering to get underwear. You’re wearing some of his sleep shorts, and a baggy shirt.”

Sitting on the edge of the bed Jeonghan stands in front of you for a moment before he leans forward and presses his lips to yours for a gentle kiss. “You know for the longest time you seem to be the only thing I can think about?” His heart swells instantly when he sees you smile at his words.

“Is that a good or a bad thing?”

“It’s very good. You make me so incredibly happy.” He smiles.

“Jeonghan, you make me happy.”

Sitting down on the bed next to you. Taking your hand in his he squeezes it three times. “Hannie-“

“Yes Angel?”

“You truly are my person. I like you so much.” You suddenly feel like crying. They aren’t sad tears. They’re anything but. “You're the first person I’ve ever been with that doesn’t make me feel like I’m some slut for my job.”

“Don’t ever call yourself that.” He chimes in.

“I don’t think I am one. I just need you to know. You make me feel so normal.”

The smile on his face is heartwarming. “You know I watched Shau and Kitten figure out their shit. They went from friends to being head over heels for each other. I even watched Wonwoo fall for Honey. And I even saw the other boys find their girlfriends. I was always so jealous wishing that I would know what it’s like to find companionship like theirs and to fall hopelessly in love.” He pauses, reaching up and resting his hand on your cheek. “And then I met you. Everything suddenly felt like it clicked when you moved in. The moment we met I had a feeling I was going to love you.”

Tears start sliding down your cheek. “Yoon Jeonghan, is this your way of telling me you love me?”

“Absolutely,” his thumb brushes the tears staining your cheek.

“I remember when Kitten introduced us. I thought you were so beautiful and I knew I was fucked.” A soft laugh passes your lips. “I love you too, by the way.”

“I should properly say, I love you.” He leans over and presses his lips to your for a soft kiss.

“Does this mean we’re officially a couple?” You think that it’s time you put a label on this.

“Angel have been my girlfriend since we fucked on the couch.” He laughs.

“Since the first night we hooked up?”

“Yes. I haven’t stopped thinking about you since.”

“So you’re my boyfriend?”

“Yes, and you’re my girlfriend.”

Holding your face in both hands he leans in pressing his lips to yours for a heated kiss. Your lips move together as if you need each other to breathe. Pulling away he rested his forehead against yours. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Since the beginning things between you have always made sense. You aren’t shocked that you fell in love with your roommate. It almost seems inevitable.

That night when you finally lose your clothes Jeonghan has you on your stomach with a pillow under your hips. Slowly he rolls his hips into you. He hits a spot deep inside. His thrusts are a little lazier than normal but you feel so incredibly close to him. His lips are over your bare shoulders. Between kisses you hear him whisper, “I love you.”

Both your highs reach you at the same time. Falling apart you moan his name. His thrust grows a little sloppy until he slows down.

He sits back on his knees and watches as his cum slowly starts to drip out of you. His mind feels fuzzy and all he can think about in that moment is how much he likes seeing you filled with him. Running his finger through your sensitive folds, he collects his cum and slowly pushes it back inside you.

He’s surprised you don’t comment on his fascination with pushing his cum back inside you.

“Hannie?”

“Yea Angel?”

“Are you having fun back there?” You tease him.

“Sorry I just like seeing you filled with my cum.” He doesn’t even bother trying to lie.

Crawling off the bed slowly he cleans himself off with a tissue before throwing in boxers and heading off to get a warm cloth to clean you up.

Jeonghan puts back on his sweatpants and you get dressed back in the sleep clothes he picked out for you.

Crawling back into bed a soft yawn passes your lips. Rolling in your side you signal for him to come hold you. The moment he is on the bed he pulls close to him. This feels perfect.

-HER-

When morning comes your wake with your body curled up against Jeonghan’s. Your head resting on his chest and your legs tangled together.

You never sleep better than you do when you’re in his arms. A soft yawn passes his lips as he pulls you closer.

“I need coffee,” his voice is raspy.

“We should get up and make some,” you nuzzle against his chest.

Slowly you both crawl out of his bed. He doesn’t bother putting a shirt on. He’s dressed in a pair of grey sweatpants that sit low on his hips. Holding your hand he leads you out of his room and out to the living room.

“Well I didn’t expect to see this,” Joshua's voice startles both of you.

Both of you stop in your tracks. Kitten pops out of the kitchen and instantly smiles at you and Jeonghan holding hands.

“I can’t say I’m shocked,” Kitten has a huge smile on her face. “You two always flirt and Hannie has always been quite fond of (Y/N).” Glancing up you see Jeonghan is blushing. You squeeze his hand and give him a smile. “Also seemed more touchy than normal.”

Kitten looks instantly happy as she stares at both of you. “So is this like an official thing?”

“I mean I love her and she’s my girlfriend,” Jeonghan responds.

“It’s about time you guys got together.” It turns out even your roommate knew that you were supposed to fall in love with Jeonghan.

Maybe Wonwoo is right when he talks about everyone having their own soulmate. Maybe Jeonghan is yours? You love him so much. He just makes everything feel right in your world.

[towasdandelion]

How would mortkranken and obscurary handle b̶e̶i̶n̶g̶ h̶u̶n̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶s̶p̶o̶r̶t̶ dealing with mc during ovulation week

Okay I do hope I'm reading this correctly cause otherwise this is going to be a lil awkward hehe. I see we're in for another spicy series (⁠｡⁠���̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧ Let's just say ovulation is scary. Anyways I hope you'll like this!

Mortkranken and Obscuary ghouls "dealing" with you while you're ovulating

warning: nsfw ahead

Jiro follows your cycle closely. Not just because of health. He just genuinely finds it interesting to observe the subtle changes in you. And let's just say he doesn't mind it in the slightest when that time comes. He's usually pretty touchy with you on daily basis so yeah. You can do whatever you want, his patience won't run out even if you ask him to come over again. He loves the fact that he can fuck you much more often since his own needs are pretty high. You can see a small satisfied smile on his face, upon seeing your blissful expression. But.. he's going to fuck you one more time, just to be sure.

Yuri also follows your cycle, but for health reasons purely. Or so it seems. He also does it to make sure he's prepared for when that time comes. He's pretty embarrassed. He knows it's in your nature, but still. Seeing you like this is too much for him. And now he's a bit conflicted.. because obviously he doesn't want to leave you unsatisfied. Will literally have to prepare himself mentally though. He's actually on the verge on losing his mind when he hears his name fall from your lips every time he thrusts into you. And as your lashes flutter as you get lost in the pleasure.. he knows he's gone, as much as he hates to admit it. A part of him is utterly fascinated when you're horny.

Ed. Case closed. But seriously, I don't think I need to say anything here. He loves it. He enjoys your "suffering" thoroughly. And of course, he's always there to satisfy you. Not like he leaves his room anyways. Won't be able to hold back from teasing you though. You always berate him whenever he's the one being horny 24/7, so consider this a little payback. But before your get too angry he's already going to have you sprawled on his bed underneath him, writhing in pleasure. There's nothing he loves more than seeing you happy. Doesn't matter if the happiness comes from having your brains fucked out or by cuddling. Same thing to him.

Rui also doesn't mind when you're needy like that. Though 'doesnt mind' is an understatement. He's takes a full advantage of it. He'd never shy away from providing you some pleasure. And the more, the better. Seeing you horny makes him horny as well so good luck leaving the bed I guess? Whatever you want - you'll get it. You want him to be gentle and whisper sweet words into your ear? You got it. You want him to fuck you so hard you're seeing stars? No questions asked he's doing it. But it doesn't end there. You can ask for anything really. A cuddling session in the middle of the day, or some spicy pictures from him. He's doing it all for you. He's doing everything he can and more to keep his girl happy.

Lyca might not know exactly how it works yet, but he'll connect the dots eventually, thanks to the fact he can sense your scent change a few times every month. And he definitely did notice it affects him as well. He probably is going to try stay away from you in the beginning. Your scent, even though subtle - will drive him insane and make him wish he could just take you here and now. Wait, that's what you want too? Then you better take him to your bedroom before he starts humping you in public.. Well, he doesn't have to worry about anything, now that it's behind the closed doors. You're up for some intense sex that will take your breath away.

[ttalgi]

missent letters pt.2

wanderer x gn! reader

part 1 || part 2

tags/cw: academic rivals to lovers, some cursing, mc is: a Vahumana student in the Akademiya, roommates with Alhaitham and Kaveh, and a pyro vision holder.

a/n: I finally finished the book a year later (lol) which made me want to make a part 2! Also, please don't mind any ooc or wrong plot details...it's been a while since I've actually played genshin.

wc: 2.1k

“It would do your remaining few brain cells some good to stop banging your head against the table. Plus this table was expensive. I can’t have the wood scratched already.”

You stop mid head bang to send Alhaitham an incredulous look. “Please!” you plead. “Have some sympathy for me at least once in your life. My life is over.” You slump your body across the living room bench.

Without missing a beat, he replies, ”I let you live here, don’t I?” Alhaitham turns to Kaveh with a raised eyebrow, “Care to fill me in on their latest tantrum?”

“It’s not a tantrum—!”

“Long story short, they asked me to send out some envelopes for them because of their busy schedule, so I told them to leave whatever they needed sent on top of their desk. Among the envelopes was one for Hat Guy, which apparently they didn’t want me to deliver.” He takes another bite of the shawarma wrap that Alhaitham brought home for dinner. 

Kaveh turns to look at your defeated form. “If you didn’t mean to send Hat Guy the letters, why were they mixed up with the other envelopes in the first place? What’s the big deal about those letters anyway?” he asks while chewing.

You perk up your head to look at him. “Huh? You didn’t read them?” you ask.

“You see, unlike some”—he sends Alhaitham a pointed look—”people, I have basic human decency.”

“Again, I let you guys live here—”

“Basically, everytime I feel anger or annoyance towards him, I just vent about it on paper pretending that he’s the recipient. Then I just stuff everything in the same envelope because it’s easy storage that way.”

“Wait!” Kaveh interrupts. “Just how many letters have you written about him? That envelope was like an inch thick. It even cost me extra postage!”

“...What can I say? I have lots of vendettas against him,” you shrug.

Alhaitham interposes, “I don’t think I understand. What’s the big deal? So what if you told him exactly how you feel about him? I didn’t take you for being a people pleaser.”

“This is why people think you’re such a machine at times, Alhaitham!” Kaveh throws his arms up in frustration. “Some people actually care about how they present themselves to others.”

“Actually!” You interject before another one of their infamous arguments breaks out full throttle. “Alhaitham’s kind of right. I did write exactly how I feel about him, and that’s the thing. I wrote everything that I felt about him..” you trail off.

Kaveh lets out a dramatic gasp. “No way! You finally confessed your feelings for him in those letters?!”

“Well, I wouldn’t exactly call it confessing. I just talked about how I think his eyes are kinda dreamy despite being cold at times and that he has a really pretty face and that”—you almost give yourself whiplash turning in his direction—”Wait, finally? What do you mean finally? There’s no way you could have known about my minuscule crush on Hat Guy!”

“Anyone with eyes and ears could tell that you have some romantic attraction towards him,” Kaveh sighs while shaking his head before gesturing to Alhaitham. “Even this guy is aware of it.”

“You two do know that I’m not socially inept, correct?”

Deciding to ignore Alhaitham, you slump back against the bench. “I’m doomed.”

You pop up with an idea. “Wait! Do you guys think Tighnari needs any more forest rangers? I can take a break until this whole thing tides over and just help him over at Avidya Forest—”

Alhaitham quenched your wishful thinking. “Knowing how substandard you are with your vision, you’d accidentally set the forest on fire.”

You stumble back as if an arrow pierced through your body. You mumble out, “Must you always humble me.” You turn to Kaveh with hopeful eyes.

“I thought I'd never say this, but I agree with Alhaitham. You trying to help Tighnari in the forest would do more harm than good. Plus, you'd end up a victim to his lectures again. Remember that one time you—”

Feeling your body riddling with piercing wounds, you slump against the bench once more. “Yeah, I’m doomed.” 

//

It's been five days since Kaveh accidentally sent out the envelope meant for Hat Guy and you aren’t sure how much longer you have until the letters would be in his possession. Unless they already were... 

If you were blessed by the Archons, then maybe the envelope was lost or better yet damaged beyond repair in delivery, but alas, you know better. The mail system in Sumeru City is known for its attentiveness, especially since many important Akademiya-based deliveries are sent and received daily.

You haven't seen Hat Guy around much these days, especially considering the fact that you’ve been actively avoiding him. Mandatory lectures that you both share? You now sit close to the exit, far from him. The library that you guys are known to basically reside in? You begged Alhaitham to let you study in his office instead, promising that you’d do his portion of the house chores for the next two weeks.

Deciding to go home early out of your own volition (Alhaitham kicked you out because of an important meeting), you carefully tread the halls of the Akademiya making sure to peek around each corner before continuing. As you start to believe that you're finally in the clear, you hear someone behind you clearing their throat. Taking a look down at the shadows decorating the floor, you see the silhouette of the man that you have been avoiding for your own peace of mind.

"How much longer are you going to rat around the Akademiya for? It's not like you can avoid me forever, you know."

Feeling offended by his choice of words, you abruptly turn around to tell him off; however, the sudden close proximity of your faces has you taking a step back. If you hadn’t been paying attention to his face, you would have thought that he was unaffected by the action, but the slight widening of his eyes before returning back to normal has you knowing otherwise.

You give Hat Guy a pointed glare. Wanting to defend yourself against his statement, you open your mouth to retaliate but the sight of the familiar envelope in his hand causes you to simply shut your mouth and grimace instead. 

As he notices your actions, Hat Guy lets an annoying smirk grace his face. "Come on, say what you were going to say. We both know that you have a lot to say to me," he says while lazily waving the envelope around.

To try and play this in your favor, you start to act nonchalant. “I don’t know what you mean by ‘avoiding you’. Also, what’s with the envelope? Never seen it before in my life.”

Hat Guy raises a brow. “What’s with this sudden stupid, chill guy persona? Anyways, it seems like you need a reminder. Not surprising considering our perspective rankings,” he subtly gloats.

“You little—”

”Let's see,”—he opens up the envelope and starts to smooth out the bottommost letter—”Maybe reading some of these letters will help jog your memory.” He makes a grand gesture of pretending to clear his throat before reading, and you can’t help but to cover your face with your hands to try and protect yourself from the upcoming embarrassing retelling.

“Again! Again, you received a higher score on an assigned research essay. It’s only been 2 months and 11 days since you’ve been enrolled into the Vahumana Darshan, so how is it that you’re the apparent “All-Knowing” about Time-Sensitive Commodities? Who do you think you are? The new Sumeru archon of wisdom? Oh, sorry. I shouldn’t be disrespecting our Lesser Lord Kusanali by comparing you to her—” he pauses and his eyes hurriedly shift to gauge your reaction. If anything, he should be thankful. If you hadn’t been so focused on not looking at him, you would have seen the crease in his brows mid-reading.

Hat Guy recomposes himself before continuing to read. “For Archon's sake. What’s more frustrating is your subtle boasting towards me. How could such a shitty personality even emit from a pretty face like yours? Though, I’ll begrudgingly admit that I actually look forward to these interactions that I have with you.”

“ST—!”

A coy smirk fills his face. “Oh? Why so embarrassed? Do you know these letters after all?”

“N-no…I was just clearing my throat.” At this point, you curse your pride for not being able to halt this interaction.

“Stubborn as always.”

This time he picks out a letter from the top of the stack..

“It's completely and utterly unfair how your resting face looks so serene. Why must you always be in the library at the same time as I? Your stupidly, bewitching face only serves as a major distraction, like how could I not stare! It's like your face was personally carved by a god. Also, how the hell do you make a simple fountain pen look so good? The way that your slender fingers grip the—”

“OK, that’s enough! Stop with the reciting! I admit it!” You feel your face heat up from embarrassment and your pyro vision only makes everything feel hotter. You raise your hands in frustration. “It was a whole mixup! Those letters weren’t even meant to be sent to you.” You dial back your volume towards the end.

He pointedly sighs. “Well that much I figured out. There’s no chance in Teyvat where you of all people would willingly subject themself to this. So, what are you going to do about it now?” he asks while crossing his arms.

It hurts to admit, but you felt stupid at this very second. “What do you mean?”

He tskd. “Do I need to explain every little thing to you? You’re ranked right below me, so I know that you’re not stupid. Are you going to own up to your letters and finally confess? Or are you going to just cowardly dismiss this like you’ve been doing?”

“CONFESS?” You almost give yourself whiplash from how fast you check to see if anyone’s heard you. You repeat yourself in a whispering tone. “Confess?”

“You talk about ‘looking forwards’ to our interactions, staring at my ‘bewitching face’ and ‘slender fingers’ and you think it’s absurd that I bring up confessing? Or would it be easier for you if I confess first?”

Without thinking you blurt out, “There’s no way that you actually like me back.”

“Do you ever see me bothering to interact with anyone as much as I do with you? I even surprised myself when I started to catch feelings for your stubborn self.”

You try to shake off the nerves before staring into his eyes. “Hat Guy, I like—”

“Wanderer.”

"What?"

"Call me Wanderer instead; it rolls off the tongue easier than Hat Guy. It’s a nickname that the traveler gave me. Hat Guy is a silly name that happened to stick around the Akademiya.”

“Lots of names you have there, huh?” you tease.

He lets out a sound that’s the mix between a chuckle and a scoff. “You don’t know the half of it.”

“Well, Wanderer. I like you. So…will you go out with me?”

“Obviously.” (Your eye roll at his matter-of-fact tone is instinctual) “I wouldn’t waste my time with anybody else. Anyways, let’s get out of here. You were on your way home before I caught you, weren't you?”

Your lips start to raise into a smile. “You’re going to walk me home?”

“Noo, I’m saying this so I can just go off on my own—”

“Oh, shut it. Let’s get out of here.”

As the both of you guys stroll out of the Akademiya, your hand closest to Wanderer suddenly can’t stop twitching every so often. Your head fills with thought pertaining to your new found relationship. 

‘Is it too early to be holding hands?…Maybe hand holding is too PDA for him on open streets—’

A cold hand suddenly embracing yours breaks you out of your stupor. You turn to Wanderer, clearly surprised by the action. Starting to feel embarrassed, you try to pry your hand out of his clutch, only for him to tighten his grip. “W-What are you doing?”

“What do you think I’m doing?” He pivots his head to the opposite side, hoping that you won’t catch his ears turning slightly pink. “Your thoughts are so loud that even Mondstadt can hear them,” he scoffs. “Just lead the way.”

You start to walk with a slight pep in your step. “As you say!”

bonus scene?:

“Hey, can I give you a nickname too? Or is it too soon..”

He turns with a raised eyebrow. “Depends. What do you have in mind?”

“XxAssMaster69xX”

He lets out the biggest sigh. “Not you too.”

“Jokes, jokes—” you pause. “Wait, me too?”

He continues to walk forwards without you.

“Me too?! Hello???”

[whalesongsblog]

An enigma.

(oneshot for @tamayula-hl and her lovely MC!🪷)

Good gods, the girl could talk.

Audacious, Ominis thought, eyes narrowed in irritation as he swept past her, trying hard to tune out the pitched lilt of her voice. Clearly, she was not capable of taking a hint either, because the pitter-patter on stone and the scent of something flowery indicated that she was following him. 

“-I just wanted to apologise! Had I known that dingy room was your secret place, I would have never- can you walk slower, please?” 

“No. I’d truly appreciate it if you left me alone.” 

There was a huff and the shuffle of her footsteps increasing their pace. Ominis groaned.

Between Sebastian’s antics devolving into a worrying downward spiral he didn’t know he had the strength to pull him back from and this girl hounding him, all he wanted was a moment’s peace. 

“Look, I know a first impression is a lasting impression, but I believe in second chances, and I really would like to get along with you. I think it’s unfair that you’re holding a small mistake against me like this. We can start from the beginning! My name is-“ 

Ominis paused. 

My name is-? 

The sudden silence was- admittedly, a blessed relief- but also strange. It wasn’t as though she’d stopped talking.

Ominis lived and breathed by his sense of hearing, and he knew that there was a difference between a pause between words and the complete absence of sound. Curiosity (not concern, he wasn’t worried about her, that was a ridiculous notion) caused him to turn, brows drawn together and mouth pressed in a firm line. 

“Well?” He didn’t mean to sound so cold. “If you must insist on following me around, the least you can do me the courtsey of is giving me your name.” 

Perhaps her name was silly. Or- a traitious part of Ominis brain piped up- perhaps it was something beautiful. The sort of name he’d enjoy saying over and over again, teasing, reprimanding- 

Silence.

“Are you still there?” 

“I can’t-“ there was that telltale warble of tears being held back. “I can’t tell you my name. I can’t tell anyone my name.” 

Ominis crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. “Go on, then. I can’t wait to hear the reasoning behind this one.” 

“I was cursed by a blood malediction. I cannot tell anyone my name, so they just- they just say I’m the girl with no name. They don’t bother to know me any further than that, anyway.” 

“Your family must have angered someone, then. But it probably wasn’t too serious, since all they cursed you with was not being able to say your name.” Ominis’ eyes shuttered slightly, something dark flitting across them. The coldness in his voice returned, sharp-edged and frigid as the Arctic tundra.

“You got lucky. Curses can be so much worse. And, frankly, you are meddlesome, you are pushy, and I quite despise-“

A sniffle cut him off.

Ominis froze. He hadn’t meant- well, he had wanted her to leave him alone but she hadn’t really done or said anything to offend him, and here he was, absolutely jumping down her throat.

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Sure, she was a little fiery nusiance, but he didn’t want her upset.

“Listen-“ his voice was lower, and he tried to soften the edges. “-don’t cry. I’m.. I’m sorry. It’s not that no one wants to get to know you, you’re just-“ 

Brash. 

Loud. 

Carefree and energetic and utterly outrageous. An unapologetic flame burning so bright that if I could see, I’d have to look away. 

“- A mystery.” Ominis finally settled on. “You’re a mystery of a classmate, that’s for certain.” 

A contemplative look flickered across his face. “That suits you, does it not?” 

“What does?” 

Her voice was less wavery and lilted upwards in curiosity instead of a shake of barely repressed tears. 

“Our mystery classmate.” Ominis wondered why he was still entertaining her and indulging in this conversation when he could have left so many minutes ago. But the responding little gasp of delight and clap of her hands had his heart swelling in a manner he’d think about later. For right now, he just wanted to hear her laugh again. 

“A mystery classmate- that makes me sound so debonaire! Like the dashing heroine of a spy thriller.” 

“MC for short, perhaps?” Ominis shifted his weight, crossing his arms in front of him, and he couldn’t help the way he grinned in response. He wanted to be upset at how easily she’d disarmed him, how her excited chatter was somehow seeping into him. 

“MC?” He heard the amusement in her voice, the hint of uncertainty.

“Of course. Plenty of people go by their initials- nobody needs to know what it stands for.” 

He could practically hear her puffing up her chest, hands on her hips. “MC,” she repeated. “My name is MC.”

Her voice softened, and the next thing he knew, a pair of arms had wrapped around him, a soft, warm weight pressed up against him. 

Ominis flushed, heat creeping up his neck and ears as she hugged him. She was so much shorter than him- with long hair scented like flowers and a delicate frame his arms came down almost instinctively to wrap around. He tried not to dwell on how perfectly she fit against him, how she felt like sunlight and the brush of a warm spring breeze.

“Thank you,” MC murmured. “It’s nice to have something to be known by.” She pulled away, leaving him significantly, unfairly flustered. “That’s ironic, isn’t it?” 

“Wh- what is?” Ominis managed to rake together his remaining brain cells that hadn’t sizzled away. He wanted to pull her back in, get to know every inch of her- 

“That you saw me more clearly in a few minutes than anyone else ever has.”

Ominis’ jaw slackened slightly at her audacity, at the cheeky tone of her voice. At the undercurrent of softness in her words, the vulnerable truth. And before he could think about what he was saying, he nodded. 

“You are… easy to see, I suppose. Metaphorically, that is.” The flush returned to his face. “And extremely loud as well. Are all Gryffindor girls this bold? I have things to do, and I cannot spend more time chattering away with you in the hallways.” 

There was that sweet, low laugh again. “Of course. Enjoy your day, Ominis! I’m so glad we’re friends now!” 

“Wait a moment, I didn’t say anything about- we are not- oh, the little minx. Now she finally learns how to walk away?” 

Ominis stood there for a moment, listening to the patter of footsteps against the stone floors. Her voice excitedly piped up as she accosted students at random in the hallways.

I have a name, now! You can call me MC. Mmhm, just the letters. It stands for Mystery Classmate. I—oh, yes, of course, you’re late for class. My apologies. 

An amused laugh escaped his lips, and Ominis wondered vaguely if he needed to go see Nurse Blainey. 

His heart thudded a little too fast, his palms were sweaty, and his stomach churned strangely.

He went still, his mind racing much like his traitorous heart. 

Oh. 

Oh no. 

Ominis Gaunt groaned and closed his eyes. Of all the women he could be feeling this way for, it had to be her. And yet, somehow, Ominis knew, deep down, that there could really be no one else. 

It truly was a mystery.

xxxxxxxx

AN: ugh I adore miss MC so much! She’s such a cute foil to Ominis’ more stoic demeanor, and I LOVED writing her!!

[chogiwow]

hold me, heal me | jake sim

pairing: jake x gn!reader (ft. jay's cameo)

wc: 9.1k+

genre: angst; sickfic; hurt-comfort

au: exes to lovers

warnings: both mc and jake are emotionally constipated for most part of the fic, jake is sick, mentions of food, yn is a sort of brusque caretaker, mentions of nudity, kissing and making out but jake is still sick ew but that’s on being in love ig, jake also contemplates murder (it's just my attempt at humor), not proofread 

a/n: i’m sick atm so yayyy :d anyway, busted this out in one sitting idek what happened

one.

jake contemplates ignoring the doorbell, the very sound of it making him snort out in mild annoyance. the weighted blanket around his frame feels warm, his feet peeking out against the soft kiss of the spring breeze.

he smells kind of mouldy, like a day-old dusty bookshelf, his fingers sport a fine sheen of oil when he rubs it across his face and his lips feel too dry. the bell rings again – he contemplates a silent murder this time.

against his will, he finds himself dragging his body out from under the comfort of his toasty blanket, sniffling and letting out a violent sneeze and somehow that hurts his throat. still, he persists, stumbling across the cool tile floors of his tiny apartment, heaving his body in his feverish state and unlocking the door with a heavy sigh.

the frown on his face drops too quickly – and again, it is against his will. not that he’s complaining this time around, because it’s you. you’re standing there; even after he blinks his eyes and squints at your face, you’re still standing there. it’s you. and he had just contemplated your murder not even minutes ago – he suddenly wants to apologise.

jake doesn’t know what to say. his throat is scratchy, thick with the remnants of sleep and sickness, but even if it weren’t, he’s pretty sure words would still fail him.

because you’re here, and he doesn’t know why.

his feverish brain scrambles for an explanation – maybe you forgot something here (impossible, you never leave things behind), or maybe you’re lost (equally impossible, you know your way around his place better than he does), or maybe you’[re here to finally cut him out of your life forever (uh, probably possible).

jake swallows. his throat protests, burning raw.

“you look disgusting,” you say, finally breaking the silence.

wow, you’ve really outdone yourself. maybe you’re taking the ‘just friends’ part a bit too literally, but even so, you won’t say that to any friend of yours. but this is jake, your ex – your ex you met again after a year not even two months ago, your ex who you had a long deep talk not even two weeks ago, your ex who, in said talk, spilled his guts out for you (literally and figuratively) over a late night drink, your ex who reluctantly promised to stay friends with because he would do whatever you told him.

jake exhales a short laugh, the sound raspy and strained. “glad to know i’m still leaving an impression.”

you roll your eyes, shifting your weight from one foot to the other. there’s something tight in your chest, something uneasy about the way he looks – pale, sweat-damp, like he’s been marinating in sickness for hours without bothering to take care of himself. which, knowing him, is probably exactly the case.

“you haven’t eaten, have you?”

jake, stubborn as ever, lifts his chin. “i had a banana.”

you glance past him, into the dim apartment, where his couch is buried under a heap of blankets, and his coffee table is cluttered with an empty cup and what looks like an unopened packet of instant ramen.

“right,” you deadpan, stepping forward without waiting for an invitation. he moves aside automatically, like he’s too feverish to even pretend to stop you.

the air inside is warm, a little stale. you wrinkle your nose, setting the plastic bag down on his kitchen counter before turning back to him.

“you look worse than i thought.”

“you mentioned that already,” he mutters, rubbing his temple. “why are you even here?”

that question. you expected it, but it still sits heavy in your stomach.

“i was in the neighborhood.”

jake gives you a flat look. “you don’t live anywhere near here.”

you press your lips together. fine. he’s not going to let you get away with that one.

“i heard you were sick.”

this is a truth. honestly, it was your precious weekend after a long week of gruelling workload, you were planning on staying in and commit fully to the homebody tag you proudly wore like an honor, but ever since getting an urgent call from jay – who was the usual caretaker in your friend group – informing you in a voice filled with worry that he was out of town and somehow jake had ended up sick and how he couldn’t be there and how jake wouldn’t let anyone take care of him anyway, you had ended up pacifying your friend that you would drop by at his place.

jake lets out a slow breath, leaning against the doorframe. the way he looks at you makes your throat tighten – like he’s trying to decipher something, trying to read between the lines of what you’re really saying.

he won’t push, though. he never does.

instead, he just nods, running a hand over his face. “well. that explains a lot.”

you arch a brow. “like what?”

“like why i thought i was hallucinating when i saw you at my door.”

your lips twitch, but you bite back the urge to smile. “maybe you are.”

jake hums, as if seriously considering that possibility. his feverish eyes flicker over you, lingering like he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he blinks too long. you can’t blame him. this – being here, stepping into his space again – is uncharted territory, and neither of you know what to do with it.

you clear your throat, turning away before the weight of his gaze unsettles you too much. “sit down,” you say, already moving toward his tiny kitchen.

jake doesn’t argue. he trudges back to his couch, collapsing onto it with a groan. he watches you from beneath his blankets, eyes hooded with exhaustion.

“you don’t have to do this,” he says after a moment. his voice is quieter now, almost careful.

you pause, rummaging through the bag you brought. “i know.”

it’s the truth. you don’t have to be here. you didn’t have to spend your saturday trekking across the city, picking up soup from that overpriced place he likes, remembering that he doesn’t like ginger in it, showing up at his door despite every logical reason not to.

but here you are.

you hear him sigh, long and tired. maybe he understands that arguing is pointless. maybe he’s just too sick to fight you on it. either way, he doesn’t protest when you kneel in front of the coffee table and open the container of soup, letting the steam curl into the air.

“eat,” you tell him, pushing the spoon toward him.

he looks at it, then at you. “you’re kind of bossy.”

“you’re kind of impossible.”

jake chuckles, though it quickly turns into a cough. he takes the spoon from you, fingers brushing against yours for the briefest second. it doesn’t mean anything. it doesn’t.

you tell yourself that as you watch him take the first sip, his shoulders sagging as the warmth settles in his chest.

“better?” you ask, voice softer than you mean for it to be.

jake doesn’t answer right away. he just looks at you, something unreadable in his fever-glazed eyes. then he smiles, small and a little lopsided.

“yeah,” he murmurs. “better.”

jake eats slowly, his movements sluggish from the fever. you sit across from him, arms crossed, watching the way he cradles the bowl in his hands like it’s the only thing keeping him tethered. it’s strange – being here again, in his space, close enough to remember how he used to lean against your shoulder whenever he was sick, how he always got clingy when he had a fever, how he used to–

you stop the thought before it can go any further.

“you’re staring,” jake mutters, glancing at you over the rim of his bowl.

“i’m making sure i keep up my end of the promise i made to jay. seriously, you can't still be this childish, refusing to even go to a hospital. what do you expect, that you’ll just get better if you rot in a bed for a few days without anyone to look after you–”

your words are harsh, you can feel them scratch your throat with their thorns, but they come out of a place of genuine concern and mild bewilderment at jake’s stubbornness. so you hope that at least a few of those thorns get stuck in your throat, for his sake at least.

“what about you?”

you blink at the interruption, lips parted midway forming your sentence. jake notices, shoving a mouthful of soup that burns his tongue before explaining.

“when you were in japan, you lived alone too. what did you do when you got sick…or, was there someone to take care of you?”

it's easy to pass off the quietness with which the question comes out to his raspy throat, but it does  nothing to soften the sudden drop in your stomach that resounds like a gong in your ears.

“how did you know i lived alone?”

i asked jay.

“jay told me.”

jake blows on his next spoonful of soup, waiting patiently for you to answer. did you have someone to take care of you?

you hesitate for a moment, caught between the truth and something easier.

“no,” you finally say. “i took care of myself.”

jake hums, like that answer is enough. like it doesn't leave a hole in the conversation. you expect him to drop it, but then—

“that must’ve been hard.”

you exhale through your nose. “it was fine.”

“liar,” he says, not unkindly. he sets the bowl down with a quiet clink, watching you with that same unreadable expression. fevered, but sharp. "you always hated being sick. said it made you feel helpless."

the words come from somewhere too familiar, a piece of history you thought had been buried. because he’s right. you did say that – once, a long time ago, wrapped up in his sheets with a fever of your own, curled up against the warmth of his body as he pressed a damp towel to your forehead. you hated it, the vulnerability of it all, the way it made you feel like you couldn’t move forward. jake had laughed back then, brushing the hair out of your face, promising you’d get through it together.

but there was no together anymore.

"excuse me?" your voice is sharp, defensive before you can stop it. but jake doesn’t flinch, doesn’t backtrack. he just keeps looking at you, feverish but steady, like he’s seeing through every wall you’ve built.

“you hate being alone,” he says simply. “you always have.”

your fingers curl against your palm, nails pressing into your skin. the room feels too warm now, the scent of soup thick in the air, pressing against your ribs. you don't know if it's his fever or yours, but suddenly, it feels like you can't breathe.

“i got used to it,” you say, and it’s meant to sound indifferent, like a shrug. but it doesn’t. it sounds tired.

jake watches you carefully, then sets the bowl down on the table with a quiet clink. his fingers trace the rim absentmindedly. “doesn’t mean it stopped hurting.”

you push yourself up, dusting imaginary lint off your jeans. "i’ll get you some water."

jake doesn’t stop you, but you can feel his gaze following you as you move around his tiny kitchen, familiar in ways you wish it wasn’t. your hands know exactly where to reach, where the glasses are, how the faucet squeaks if you turn it too fast. it’s ridiculous.

and he wonders what you might have gone through yourself. here, he had the safety of his friends, a reliable, if not burdensome indulgence for him. one call, and he was sure one friend or another would drop by if he was sick.

you however, had been all alone in a new country. new job, new people, new place, an unfamiliar language and no friends to call upon. did you let yourself rot in bed too? he wanted to ask you so much, but he still didn’t feel like he had the right to pry into your life yet.

it’s been a year since you broke up, two months since you met again, two weeks since you had that conversation – one where he admitted things you weren’t sure you wanted to hear, and you promised things you weren’t sure you could keep.

and now you were here, refilling his glass like no time had passed at all.

jake watches you carefully, his fever-flushed face softening in a way you don’t quite know how to deal with. his gaze lingers – not in the sharp, teasing way he would look at you, but in a quiet, searching way, like he’s seeing something in you he hadn’t noticed before.

placing the glass on the table, you make a final attempt at saving yourself. you’re not sure what you need saving from, jake is the one who’s sick, if anything you have the upper hand here (again, you don’t why you  need a upper hand in the first place), but jake’s sudden intervention had rattled you nonetheless. the way he kept on seeing through you like he knew you better than the back of his hand, even when all your cards were tucked safely in your han and the table in front of you was empty. 

“it’s not like i had a choice.”

“yeah,” jake murmurs. “i guess not.”

a silence settles between you, neither awkward nor comfortable, just there. you could fill it with something light, something inconsequential, but the weight of the moment keeps you still.

jake sets the bowl down on the table, leaning back against the couch. his head tilts slightly, exhaustion tugging at his expression. “you should’ve called.”

you frown. “what?”

“when you were sick,” he says simply, like it’s the easiest thing in the world. “you should’ve called me.”

a bitter laugh rises in your throat before you can stop it. “right. because that would’ve been appropriate.”

jake doesn’t flinch, he just looks at you, steady despite the fever dulling his edges. “i wouldn’t have cared about “appropriate.”

you open your mouth, then close it again. because what can you even say to that? you hadn’t called him. of course, you hadn’t. it had been a year. a whole year of learning how to exist without him, of burying old instincts, of teaching yourself not to reach for your phone when something reminded you of him.

but now, sitting here, watching the way his fingers twitch like he wants to reach for you, you wonder if you ever really unlearned any of it.

you exhale, shaking your head. “just finish the soup, jake.”

his lips twitch, barely a ghost of a smile. he doesn’t argue.

maybe it’s the fever, or maybe it’s just him, but he doesn’t stop watching you. even as he eats, even as the warmth returns to his face, even as you sit there, pretending this is normal.

you don’t look back at him. you can’t.

because something about this – about being here, about taking care of him again – feels too easy. about the way he so easily manages to remind you of the past despite yourself, how he easily manages to look past you, through you, at you with those same kind eyes you had fallen in love with all those year ago. and you don’t know what to do with that.

so you do what comes to you naturally when your mind is crumbling on itself. you move, you work, you take action. you make yourself busy.

shrugging off your jacket, you push the sleeves of your shirt up and rummage through another plastic bag. pulling out a packet of fever reducing medicines, you pop one out of its pellet and hand it to jake.

“have this, then go to sleep.” there’s determination in your voice, you’re already planning out what to do, “i’ll clean up here and check on you later, so just go get some rest and don’t worry too much about it.”

jake doesn’t want to argue, but he doesn’t want to waste his time sleeping when he knows you’ve already made up your mind to stay in his apartment for the time being. also, he doesn’t want to make you clean up after him.

“wait y/n, you don’t have to clean up–”

“jake, for all i know, you’ve been marinating in your own sickness for two days straight,” you deadpan, already picking up the leftover dishes off his table and striding towards his kitchen, shaking your head at the sinkful of old dishes, “go to sleep, i’ll wake you up in a few hours and you can take a shower then. i’ll change your sheets while i’m at it too–”

you ramble off about the list of things you’re mentally taking note of and it makes jake dizzy. this is a side of you that is new to him. it’s like you’re giving him no chance at making a move. he sees you deal out your cards, it’s so clear to him, but he feels powerless right now, your back facing him like a sturdy wall.

he follows the line of your shoulders, the tension taut in them as you continue with your work, your hands moving on their own as you rinse dishes and rearrange the kitchen, though you’re not really seeing any of it. the soft clink of plates against each other fills the quiet room, but your mind is miles away.

behind you, you hear jake shift on the couch, a low sigh escaping his lips. it’s soft, the kind of sigh that says more than words ever could. you try to focus on the task at hand, but every time you move, you feel his eyes on you. it makes your skin feel too tight, your thoughts too loud.

you hear his footsteps receding as he makes his way to his room, the sound of his movements getting muffled the further away he moves. he doesn’t shut the door behind him, instead, getting in bed and letting himself be lulled into a sleep with the sound of your own movements in the kitchen. and it feels unreal.

jake is half certain that he would wake up and realise that this had all just been a fever dream, that he had indeed been hallucinating your figure, tat he had conjured up your voice from the depths of his memory, that the frown on your pretty face had been his karma – even in his dreams, you were upset at him. and for a while he tries to stay awake, fighting his heavy eyes and the soreness in his limbs and the weight of the blanket over his frame. 

you hear the soft creak of the bed, the rustle of sheets. it’s a quiet reminder that jake is still there. that he’s still so close, even though you’ve tried to keep your distance. he’s not the one who’s avoiding you anymore. you are. and every moment you spend not looking at him, not addressing what’s hanging between you, it feels like a crack getting wider.

a distant groan from the bedroom snaps you out of your thoughts. jake. his voice, thick with the fever, is a reminder of how everything is spinning out of control. you pause for a moment, eyes flicking towards the hallway, your heart tightening in your chest.

you didn’t call him when you were sick. you didn’t need to. you couldn’t. but right now, you’re here. you’re standing in his kitchen, pretending you’re not trembling with every second that passes, pretending you’re not dying to check on him. to feel something, anything, other than this cold distance you’ve forced between you both.

but you simply dissociate. your movements grow more mechanical as you tidy up, but you know that you're running from something. running from the truth, from the flood of emotions that threaten to break the fragile dam you've built. the truth is, you’ve been avoiding him for so long – maybe longer than you even realized – but the cracks are showing now, and it's making everything harder than it needs to be.

you try not to think about the past, the things you’ve buried, but it’s impossible. because here you are, again. taking care of him. watching him. being drawn to him despite everything that should keep you apart.

the silence stretches, only the sound of water and cutlery keeping you company. if you strain your ears, you could probably hear the laboured breaths in the bedroom. 

the glass in your hand feels heavier now, like it’s a vessel for everything you’ve kept inside. you’re holding it with too much force, fingers tight around it, but you don’t want to let go. you’re afraid that if you do, the dam will break. that all the words, all the thoughts you’ve buried so deep, will flood out and you won’t be able to stop them.

two.

somewhere in the middle of a restless sleep and the sense of a lingering presence, jake finds himself being shaken awake.

there’s a gentle pressure on his arm, squeezing his skin comfortingly and coaxing his eyes to flutter open. his head feels lighter this time around, weighed down by a damp cloth that feels like a balm across his skin, but its the hand around his arm that he really zeroes in on the moment he’s up.

so you hadn’t been a fever dream after all. that means you had been upset at him in reality. well, that’s a concern for later. all he registers is that you hadn’t left. yet. 

“hey,” your voice is tentative, just like your fingers curling around his arm as if you’re afraid you’re going to startle him back into consciousness, “you should get up and take a shower, i ran you some hot water”

your voice, it’s so quiet and sweet. your fingers graze against his skin when you remove the towel off his and run your fingers across the long strands of hair across his forehead – he shivers. your forehead puckers into a frown, palm flattening against his head again. a small sigh escapes his lips, the feeling so welcome, he lets his eyes fall shut again, but you move your hand again and all jake feels is the emptiness lying heavy against his skin.

jake blinks slowly, the sleep still clouding his vision as he processes your words, the absence of your touch a sharp contrast to the warmth you’d left behind. he swallows hard, pushing himself up with effort, the weight of exhaustion still clinging to him.

the cool air from the window brushes against his damp skin, and he can hear the soft rustling of the room as you move around, no longer hovering. you’ve given him space, and yet, he feels more crowded than ever by the silence between you two. the quiet hum of the room is deafening.

his hands reach for the towel you’d left behind, the fabric still warm from the contact with his skin. he presses it to his forehead again, and for a fleeting moment, he thinks about how this small gesture – this simple act of care – might have been enough if he hadn’t messed it all up.

when he shuffles into the bathroom, you're already there, standing at an awkward angle away from the showerhead as you twist and turn the knobs, one hand under the water to test the temperature.

“just a sec, it’s a bit too hot right now,” you barely glance at him as you continue with his ministrations. and jake? he’s honestly still too tired to want to read into your actions but that doesn’t mean his chest doesn’t twist in a weird way.

once you’ve determined the right temperature of the water, you move towards jake who’s leaning with his head against the bathroom tiles. the room itself is tiny, a two-by-two metre cubicle that feels too crowded with the both of you inside. jake sniffles, raising his arms in a pathetic attempt to take his jacket off but he’s obviously unsuccessful.

you don’t even spare a reaction, naturally moving to help him, maneuvering one arm out of his jacket, then the other. and it’s with this same instinct that your fingers reach for the hem of his shirt too, ready to pull it over his head but you stop at the very last second, almost abruptly, it gives you a whiplash.

instantly your eyes meet his. he’s already looking at you and unfortunately you can read his emotions all too well.

the shower runs in the background, steam curling up into the air, and you both stand there for a moment, hesitating. part of jake wants to stay lost in the haze of exhaustion, to let you take the call and help him take his shirt off. but another part – the part that knows you woldn’t dare unless he pushed you – wants to step forward with his arms stretched out, telling you to take it off for him.

jake swallows again, this time louder, his throat dry. he could let you take over, could surrender to the care you’re offering, let you guide him through the motions. it would be easy to let go, but there’s something about the way you’re looking at him – something raw and real – that makes him second-guess.

“i… i can do it,” jake says hoarsely, his voice quiet and rough, like it hasn’t been used properly in too long. his hands hover, reaching up toward his shirt but faltering at the last second. you see him pause, the conflict in his eyes, and for a split second, he wishes he could pretend it was just the exhaustion talking. but it's not. it’s more than that.

you stand there, frozen, hand still poised just inches from his chest, the tension between you two becoming almost suffocating. but despite the silence, there’s an unspoken understanding that lingers between you, a fragile thread that hasn’t snapped yet.

finally, you take a step back, releasing a quiet breath as you straighten up. you glance down for a moment, biting your lip, then look back at him with a mixture of resolve and something softer. "you should... you should take care of it yourself," you say, your voice a little strained, as though you're holding something back.

jake wants to argue, to tell you it's fine, to just let him lean into whatever you've been offering. but instead, he stays quiet, his gaze not leaving yours. he takes the final step toward the shirt, the fabric slipping off easily, but for some reason, the act feels heavier now. the weight of the decision, the weight of what it means to ask for help or not.

your eyes avert on their own, catching but a momentary peek of his naked skin. this shouldn’t be that weird, you shouldn’t be this flustered. you’ve seen him like this before, hell you’ve seen and done much more than this before, but that was then. this is now – you’re taking care of your sick ex who you’re just friends with.

you wish there was a guidebook for this sort of situation.

you swallow hard and try to keep your voice steady when you speak. "i’ll get you something to eat after," you say, your voice almost too soft, barely reaching him over the water.

there’s a pause. a beat that feels like it could stretch on forever.

"yeah," jake murmurs, his voice low and tired. "thanks."

you can’t quite tell if he means it, if it’s just the exhaustion talking, or if it’s something more. you don’t ask. the weight of his answer is enough. he’s waiting for you to leave before he can get into the shower.

almost against your will, your gaze flickers to him – just a quick look, a fleeting glance. and it’s enough to leave you breathless for a second. his back is to you, but you can see the way his shoulders tense, the curve of his spine, the way condensation already starts setting, dampening his skin with a thin layer of mist from the shower. 

you wish you could stay; it's a thought that startles you and embarrasses you. but it's also a thought that sobers you up in an instant, startling you out of your reverie and making your feet finally move. the door shuts behind you with a soft thud, but you don’t hear the soft click of the lock turning.

the moment the door clicks shut, you press your back against it, letting out a breath you didn't even realize you'd been holding. your hands are trembling slightly, and you quickly clasp them together, squeezing them tight to keep the unease from showing. you force yourself to breathe, to steady the racing thoughts in your head.

you’re just friends now. that’s what you promised, that’s what you agreed on. but why does everything about this feel so far from simple?

the faint sound of the shower running leaks through the thin walls. a knot tightens in your stomach. you press your palms against the door, the coolness of the wood grounding you for a second. this is supposed to be temporary, you remind yourself. just a few more hours, a couple of days at most, and you’ll both go back to your separate lives. you can’t afford to let yourself slip back into this space. not now.

jake stands still in the shower, the hot water cascading over him, though it does little to wash away the frustration building inside. his thoughts race faster than the droplets falling from the showerhead, each one a sharp reminder of how easy it was to slip back into this. the moment you stepped into the apartment, everything shifted. even though you'd kept your distance, it didn’t take much for him to feel the pull again.

he shuts his eyes tighter, pushing the water away, wishing it could drown out the thoughts swirling in his head. why? why was it so easy to let you back in? how did you always know the right thing to do? 

then again, he had always blindly believed you back when you were together, trusting your decisions like they were the bible itself. maybe that had been his downfall in a way, when he had reluctantly but respectfully agreed to the breakup. thinking about it now, you were wrong. you had been so wrong, and he had resented you for it. he had resented himself for believing you just because he was in love with you and he realised not much had changed, because he had let you fool him again by making him promise to be just friends with him. even after a whole year of repenting, resolving and regretting, it had been that easy for you to crumble him in your hands – all because he still loves you.

and he thinks that is reason enough to let himself be wavered by you – your imploring eyes, your worried lips, the frown on your face, the plea in your voice – he’d give in to you and your demands any day and every day.

but he doesn’t think he wants to. right now, standing under the warm water you had run for him, it enraged him a little how he had just stood there letting you do your thing while he waited. no, in fact, its not the waiting that set him off, he would wait for you for however long you made him, it was the way you had such an easy say in his life. how you could just do something, and he wouldn’t question it.

why should we remain friends?

he should have asked you that rather than agreeing along with you. you had given him no logical reason, but he had sensed the emotionally turbulent place it had come from, so he had left it at that. but now he wants to know. now he wants to know why you should remain just friends? why would you be here taking care of him when he’s sick? do you not still love him?

your voice from earlier lingers in his ears: i’ll get you something to eat after. the way you said it was soft, almost like a promise. but he can’t help but hear the unspoken words between the lines. it wasn’t just about food. you were offering something more, but you were hiding it behind the guise of something mundane. you were offering care, but you were also offering distance.

jake grips the edge of the shower, knuckles white as he exhales sharply. the water no longer feels comforting. it’s just another distraction. another way for him to bury his feelings.

"god," he mutters to no one, his voice barely above a whisper. "why do you still do this to me?"

he’s angry. angry at the situation, angry at himself for still caring, for still wanting you in ways he shouldn't. and yet, underneath the anger, there's an ache – a yearning that refuses to be ignored. he wants to reach out, to pull you back, to make you see that he still matters. that they both still matter.

but instead, he grits his teeth, trying to keep the heat of his frustration contained. no more waiting, he thinks. no more pretending.

when the water runs cold, he steps out of the shower, his body shivering slightly, but it’s nothing compared to the chill creeping under his skin. he pulls a towel around his waist and stares at his reflection in the foggy mirror. for a second, he barely recognizes the man in the glass. the person he used to be – the one who thought everything would just fall into place after the breakup, the one who convinced himself they could both move on – feels like a stranger.

but he’s done pretending now.

jake pulls open the bathroom door and steps into the hallway, the soft hum of the apartment the only sound. he doesn’t have a plan, but he knows one thing for sure: he’s not going to let this go without asking the questions that have been haunting him. not anymore.

you’re sitting on the couch, your knees tucked under your chin, a blanket draped over your lap. you’re only half paying attention to the television, head peeking up every so often to check the pot of soup boiling over the stove. the sight almost makes him turn back. almost makes him halt in his steps and rethink what he’s about to do. does he really want to break this moment?

i mean, he could retreat now, disappear into the quiet of his thoughts, and then return to let you serve him the warm cup of soup. he could play it off, pretending not to read too much into it, maybe even use the moment to ask about your time in japan. you'd tell him about how much you loved it, carefully sidestepping any mention of the loneliness you’d carried with you, dodging his prying questions with practiced ease. after that, you'd clean up again, hand him the fever-reducing pills, and tuck him into bed. he’d wake up feeling better, and you’d finally leave. and when you did, things would go back to what they were before. just friends. just the way it had always been.

and then you’ll keep being ‘just friends’.

but he doesn’t. instead, he walks towards you, his footsteps steady despite the whirlwind inside him. his naked torso feeling the brunt of his actions as the cool breeze pricks his skin.

"you’re not going anywhere, are you?" the question slips out before he can stop it, his voice rough. he’s barely even aware of the way his heart pounds in his chest.

you look up at him, surprise flickering across your face, but it doesn’t last long. you meet his gaze, steady, cautious, before they trail along the path of his body – his naked body, save for the towel around his waist. what the fuck.

"jake," you start, but your voice falters, unsure of how to navigate this new situation, “i’m right here, so can you please go put something on, you’re gonna get sick again if y–”

but he’s not going to let you hold back. not anymore.

"no," he interrupts softly. "i need to know, right now. why are we still pretending?"

three.

the room holds its breath, the tension almost tangible in the quiet after jake’s question. for a moment, neither of you speaks. your eyes flicker between him and the door, as if you could somehow slip out of this without answering. but you know you can’t. not anymore. not with the weight of his question hanging between you.

he’s let you convince him to put on clothes for the moment, but he refuses the bowl of soup you set in front of him.

“answer me y/n, i’m not eating anything until you answer my questions tonight.”

you can already feel a headache creeping up your neck. you sit on the other end of the couch, burying your head in your hands and letting out a weary sigh. jake had picked the worst time to be his stubborn self again.

you clear your throat, trying to regain control of the situation, but your voice feels small, fragile. “jake… i – i don’t know what you want me to say.” you stand up slowly, hands still gripping the blanket around you, though the warmth of it feels distant now. “you’re sick. you should just rest.”

but jake doesn’t look sick. not in the way he did when you first found him, feverish and weak, barely able to sit up. he sits across you now, your bodies separated by just a few feet. there’s a fire in his eyes, something raw and insistent that makes it hard to breathe.

“you’re avoiding the question,” he says, his voice low but firm. “why are we still pretending? why are you really here?”

“where is this coming from? i thought you were fine with me being here–”

“yeah, i was sick and barely in any condition to argue with you.”

“oh. oh, so now that you’re feeling better you think you can–”

“i can what?” jake’s voice is still raspy, but it's firm. it rattles you. jake has always been the more emotional one in your relationship whereas you took the reign of being the logical counterpart. yet now, you can’t find yourself coming up with anything close to a logical explanation.

you hesitate, the words swirling in your mind but never quite making it past your lips. his question cuts through everything you’ve been holding back, and you feel exposed, raw. this isn’t the same dynamic anymore. jake’s eyes bore into yours, his frustration simmering just beneath the surface, and you can’t look away.

“i – i don’t know what you want from me,” you stammer, your voice barely above a whisper. “i thought... i thought we were just getting through this. i’m here because i care about you, jake. i always have.”

jake’s jaw tightens, and he takes a step forward, his presence looming over you. his gaze doesn’t soften; it only grows more intense, more insistent.

“no,” he says quietly. “you’re here because you can’t let go of whatever we were, but you're too scared to admit it. you’re scared of what happens next, scared of how things might change if we stop pretending.”

the words hit harder than you expect. you recoil slightly, trying to maintain your composure, but the tension in the room feels suffocating, like you’re drowning in the weight of your own fear. you can feel your pulse in your throat, each beat hammering against your chest.

“i’m not pretending,” you murmur, but even to your own ears, it sounds hollow. “i’m... i’m just trying to make sure you're okay.”

jake doesn’t let you off the hook. “and what about you? what are you doing, huh? what about what you need?” his voice cracks just a little at the end, the vulnerability slipping through. you’ve never heard him sound like this before, and it shakes you to your core. the certainty in his eyes falters for just a second, but when he speaks again, it’s like he’s trying to bury it. “i can’t do this anymore. i can’t be the one who’s always waiting for you to come back, for you to decide if i’m worth it.”

you flinch. his words strike deeper than any physical blow could. he’s right, in a way you’ve been refusing to face him. you’ve been holding him at arm’s length, never fully letting him back in, always waiting for something – anything – that would make it easier to walk away without feeling like you’re suffocating. but jake’s not giving you that luxury anymore.

“what the hell are you even saying jake,” your temper rises now, you’re not sure if its the way jake deems the way you regard him or whether it's the truth of everything he is hitting you with all of a sudden, “you are worth everything i have ever put my life upon, don’t go around making me the bad guy. i have never deemed you any less than what you deserve, and you’ve always deserved the best.”

these words are unfiltered and sound almost childish in your ears. gone is the grace with which you pride yourself in forming sentences, now everything you’re saying sounds like some third grade rendition of a love letter. you burn in embarrassment and anger, because in the end, jake has reduced you to this state.

but jake doesn’t regard it as such, if anything, he’s gotten you to finally talk.

“what are you afraid of?”

you look at him, your throat tight, and suddenly, it feels like everything is crashing down. it’s always been easier to lie, to hide behind excuses, behind the safety of distance. but with jake right in front of you, his question still lingering – for the first time, you can’t push it away. you can’t hide from it anymore.

“what am i afraid of?” you repeat the words softly, like a question to yourself. but deep down, you already know the answer, and it terrifies you.

“i’m afraid of what happens when we stop pretending,” you confess, voice cracking. you can’t look at him as you say it – can’t bear to meet his eyes, because everything you’ve been burying under the surface comes spilling out in the form of this one fragile truth. “i’m afraid that if we really look at this... at us, there won’t be anything left to hold on to.”

jake’s silence is deafening. you risk a glance at him, only to find him staring at you with something close to heartbreak in his gaze. his lips press together, and for a moment, you think he’s going to say something, but then his chest rises and falls with a sharp breath, like he’s swallowing everything he feels.

“you think... you think that if we let go, we’ll be nothing?” his voice is quieter now, almost lost. but there’s still that fire in it, just softer. “is that what you really believe, y/n? that everything we had means nothing if it’s not perfect?”

you wish you could say something, anything, to make this easier – to make him understand. but it’s all coming out now, too much and too fast.

“i don’t know what i’m doing, jake.” the words tumble out, helplessly, just like the tears that start rolling down your cheeks, “i... i don’t know how to stop being afraid that we’ll just break again. that i’ll break, and i’ll hurt you, and then there won’t be any coming back from it.”

you hesitate, taking a shaky breath, and the real reason – one that’s been buried so deep for so long – slips out before you can stop it. “i was so scared of losing you, jake. but i realized that if i kept holding onto you like that maybe i’d end up suffocating you.”

jake’s jaw tightens, and you watch his expression shift. you don’t know if he understands completely, but something flickers in his eyes. you think about the time you walked away, the way you chose to close off instead of facing the fear of losing him to your own need for control. the thing you were so afraid of – the thing that led to your breakup.

“the thing is,” you continue, voice cracking, “i wanted us to be this perfect thing, but i couldn’t let go of the part of me that was terrified. i kept pushing you away. and then... when we finally did break up, i thought i was saving us both from more hurt. but all i was really doing was hurting you.”

jake’s hand inches towards you, afraid that you would pull away before he could reach you. when his fingers finally find yours across the couch, he holds on firmly. you don’t pull away.

“i thought you just didn’t need me anymore. that you were pushing me out, choosing to shut me out because you didn’t want to deal with the mess of everything we were.”

he looks at you, and it’s like his eyes are pleading for you to see it. “but i was just trying to be there. for you. i tried everything i could, y/n. you wouldn’t let me in. every time i pushed, you pulled back. and in the end, i felt like i was nothing but a burden to you. that was why i stepped back...because i thought it was what you wanted. i thought i wasn’t enough.”

the truth of his words settles like a weight in your chest, heavy and sharp. the weight of his hand on top of yours feels burdensome, but then his fingers start caressing your skin, thumbing circles across the soft flesh of your wrist.  and then you realize: all that time, while you were protecting yourself from the pain of losing him, you were pushing him into a corner, suffocating him with your need for control. and it destroyed the connection you had – your walls went up, and his came down.

“you thought you weren’t enough?” you whisper, the tears keep rolling, “i’m sorry. i was so scared... scared that if i let you too close, i’d lose myself in you. i needed to keep control, jake. but i never wanted to push you away like that. and i... i didn’t see how badly i was hurting you until it was too late.”

jake now turns to you entirely. all his yearning oozes out of him desperately, maybe it’s because you’ve finally had this talk, but he can feel the tiredness returning in his limbs, finally relieved. he expects you to completely push him away, but he reaches out regardless and maneuvers you with gentle hands across his lap.

“if you know now that you hurt me, take responsibility for it.” he says, letting you ease yourself in his hold. you’re hesitant at first, but with every stroke of his fingers across your cheeks, you settle down and let him wipe your tears away.

he buries his face against the crook of your neck and it's a feeling you don’t realise you’ve missed. the sigh that tumbles out your lips is just a testimony of you finally giving in to this feeling.

“jake,” your voice is a silent whisper, “you’re still sick, you shouldn’t be–”

but whatever it is that you think jake shouldn’t be doing is suddenly a thought flung right to the back of your mind when his lips meet yours in a silent plea. just the soft touch of his chapped skin against yours. it ends as abruptly as it starts.

“fuck,” he curses, slightly out of breath even though he hadn’t done much, “you’re right, i’m sick, i shouldn’t be kissing you–”

oh but who cares. it’s just a mild fever, so what if you fall sick too?

you’re pressing your lips against him too, shutting him up with a kiss that he surrenders himself into despite his own protest against his sickness. because you’re here, in his arms, kissing him like that's all you’ve wanted to do. and for once, jake doesn’t complain, because you’ve never kissed him like this before. you've never shown him just how starved you are for him. and he understands this feeling, he’s felt this way for you forever, but he’s also slightly dumbfounded at the way you hold him tight and kiss him breathless.

he feels dizzy again, but not for anything in the world is he going to stop you right now. he simply latches on to you tighter, pulling you impossibly close and moves his lips with yours, letting you bruise his own.

you both finally pull away, breathless, eyes searching the other like you’ve been lost in the dark for too long. the weight of everything that’s been unsaid, everything that’s been holding you both apart, is still there, but now there’s something else. a sense of clarity, an understanding that feels so fragile, like the first light breaking through a storm.

jake presses his forehead to yours, a soft laugh escaping him as he steadies his breath. “god, i’ve missed you like this. i’ve missed us.” his voice is low, raw with emotion, and you feel that familiar pull in your chest again – the one you’ve been trying to ignore, trying to convince yourself isn’t real. but it is. it always has been.

you pull back slightly, still tangled in his arms, your heart racing. “jake, i... i don’t know how to fix all the damage i’ve done. i don’t even know if i deserve to ask for another chance... after everything.”

his eyes soften, his thumb gently brushing over your lips like he's memorizing the way they feel against his skin. “y/n,” he says, his voice steady and sure now, “you don’t have to fix anything all at once. we don’t have to pretend like everything’s perfect, because it’s not. but i’m willing to try again, if you are.”

your chest tightens at his words, the weight of everything still hanging between you, but it feels like the first step. it feels like a chance to rebuild, even if it’s not easy, even if it takes time. he’s offering you the space to breathe, to come to him when you’re ready, but with no expectation that you have it all figured out. 

“i’m scared, jake,” you admit, your voice trembling. “i’m scared i’ll push you away again. that i’ll hurt you again.”

he shakes his head, a small, reassuring smile playing at his lips. “you won’t. not if we face it together.”

you feel a strange sense of calm settle over you, like a weight lifting off your shoulders, even though the future is still uncertain. but for the first time in a long time, it’s not so terrifying. maybe because you’re not facing it alone.

“can we... just take it slow?” you whisper, your fingers curling into his shirt. “can we rebuild this, piece by piece? i don’t want to rush it.”

jake smiles, despite the sudden dull thudding in his head.

“you’re asking for slow after you just kissed me like that?”

you know he’s teasing you, you feel the warmth flush your cheeks but before you can reprimand him, his hand moves to the back of your head, pulling you in for another gentle kiss; this time slower, deeper, like he’s memorizing the way you feel against him. when he pulls away, there’s a look in his eyes that tells you more than words ever could.

“slow’s fine with me,” he murmurs. “we’ll do it at our own pace. whatever it takes.”

you bury your face in the crook of his neck; it feels like home.

“thank you,” you whisper, even though you’re not entirely sure what you’re thanking him for yet. for understanding? for being patient? for loving you despite everything?

you don’t know. but you’re grateful.

“i’ll make it right, jake,” you say, your voice muffled against his skin. “i’ll find a way to make it right.”

and for the first time, you truly believe it.

epilogue.

a week later, you’re sprawled on the couch, tissues scattered around you, feeling miserable. jake walks in, grinning, holding soup and medicine.

“you really went for it, huh?” he teases, setting the soup down. “kissed me, and now you’re sick.”

you groan. “you didn’t have to kiss me back so passionately.”

jake laughs. “what can i say? i had to make up for lost time.”

you roll your eyes but can’t help smiling. “well, it’s your fault. i was fine until you—"

“don’t even try to blame me,” he cuts in, sitting beside you. “we both know you loved it.”

before you can retort, jay pops his head out from your kitchen, shaking his head. “you two seriously couldn’t wait a week to not get sick?”

you throw a pillow at him. “shut up, jay.”

he grins. “i’m just saying, you couldn’t have waited at least a week, or at least till he got better? are you guys animals, did you have to make out right then?”

you groan and pull the blanket tighter around yourself. “jay, please, you’re killing me.”

jake chuckles, clearly amused by jay’s teasing. “i’m sure it was worth it.”

jay raises an eyebrow. “it better have been. you’re both out of commission now. y/n’s got the cold, and i’m stuck being the responsible one. like i don’t have enough to deal with.”

you glance at jake, still leaning into him for comfort, and say in your best innocent voice, “you could always leave, jay. let us suffer in peace.”

jay gives you a mock glare. “oh, i see how it is. i come over to check on you, and now i’m the bad guy.”

jake smirks, clearly enjoying the banter. “you’re lucky we didn’t need you to play nurse. we’ve got it covered.”

jay rolls his eyes dramatically, then turns to leave. “fine. but if you two are going to be in here swapping germs and cuddling like an old married couple, don’t say i didn’t warn you.”

before he can disappear completely, you call out after him. “hey, jay?”

he pauses at the door.

“next time, bring actual medicine. not just your sarcasm.”

jay grins, tossing a playful wink over his shoulder. “can’t help it, y/n. it’s what i do best.”

with that, he’s gone, and the silence between you and jake is comfortable, warm. you look up at him, giving him a half-smile.

“i guess it’s just us then?”

jake kisses your forehead gently. “just us.”

[bridgeicesbeforeroadif]

Bridge Ices Before Road!

Links: DEMO-PATREON-FORUM

Updated 10/29/24

~Summary~

Was there anything that could get between you and a gold medal?

Well, yes. A lot of things. There’s your family, including your annoying younger sibling. Moving back home with them will be tough, but it allows you to focus on your gains. There are competitions to win, and you have to stay in peak condition all the while. You also have your mother breathing down your neck to make sure nothing jeopardizes your chances at success. Your father is more hands-off. He almost always has half of his mind on work, even when he’s at home.

Your coach will guide you through the ups and downs of skating, as they’ve never let you down before. They remind you of your father a bit, never able to fully turn off part of their brain that thinks about work. You hope they remember to relax, and let you do the same.

Your childhood friend-turned-rival is always one step ahead of you these days. They beat you out as part of the top couple in the pairs free skate last year, and since then you haven’t been able to top their performances. You used to be friends, but now there was a fire in their eyes when they looked at you. Will you be able to mend this friendship?

Even worse, you run into an old bully of yours (that you might secretly have had a crush on since forever ago) who has just been appointed the captain of the local hockey team. He plays at your local rink now, and that means you’ll be seeing each other more than you’d like.

You find a friend in a fellow skater who becomes something of a pen-pal to you. They reach out over social media, and there’s an instant connection. They’re a total sweetheart, and you can’t wait to meet them at the first event.

 Finding your place again in your old hometown might sound tough, but nothing is tougher than being an Olympic athlete. You have to juggle training along with all that, but you try not to let it get you down. After all, skating is your passion!

Don't let the creepy figure outside your bedroom at night get you down. If you ignore it, it will be fine. It was just your imagination... right? Draw the curtains, drink some warm milk, and put on some music to drown out the haunting song whistled into the gaps in your windows. Tonight, you escape into your dreams knowing all the exits are locked up tight and there's no way in. It's all in your head.

But remember, escaping isn’t always an option.

~Features~

Customize your MC! Name, sexuality, appearance, hair, eyes, clothing, and more! (MC is genderlocked female)

Find friendship or romance in the least likely places! Each route has its own ups and downs with tailored story-telling.

Get stalked by a really big fan. No, I mean like a REALLY big fan. They know things about you that no one else does! Will you get away? Or will you be unable to stop their villainous plot?

Win (or lose) against the best skaters in the country– and the world!

~Romance Options~

Dallas Doverman

 male/6’0/20yo

 The hockey team captain. He bullied you in elementary and middle school. You can select whether or not you had a crush on him. They certainly had one on you, and that’s why they picked on you so much, not that you knew. Nowadays, instead of helping his dad around at the skate rental and pulling your pigtails, he plays ice hockey with the big boys. He was the youngest on the team, but still made captain in such a short time.

Dallas is tall and broad. His straight black hair is longer on top and rests above his ears, trimmed short on the sides. He’s grown a lot and lost that old baby fat that clung to his cheeks. A dark beard forms on his face, but doesn’t fully block out his skin.

Vincenzo/Valentina Ciolfi

 selectable m or f/5’8 or 5’5/18yo

 They were once your friend. Then, you went to Boxcroft and they didn’t. It was a shock to everyone, V included.  They swore to get better and become your superior someday. You hadn’t expected it to affect your relationship, but it did. You drifted apart, their hostility ever-growing and there was nothing you could do about it. 

With dewy, caramel skin and shoulder-length golden brown and almost blonde locs kept in a low ponytail, V just screams “over it.” They did not care enough to do anything to their hair or pick out a nice outfit. They do that for competitions, and that’s enough.

Argo/Allegra Papandreou

 Selectable m or f/5’10 or 5’6/28yo

 Your coach. They were just like you, hailed as a prodigy until they graduated school, then they stopped being a rising star and became a plateauing one. You followed their career almost religiously, and always wondered what changed. They only started coaching for you. Before that, they worked in accounting, the business for which they got their degree. You couldn’t believe that was what happened to the Starchild of Skating in the 2010’s. They saw real talent in you at a young age and changed career paths. You hope you weren’t a mistake.

Dark brown hair falls in waves over Argo’s ears. Anita wears hers long, down to her waist. They are leanly muscled, but toned all over. Even after years of being out of the game, they had not let their body grow flabby or let it fall out of use. They look as ripped as they did in their teens when they stole the show at Nationals when they were your age.

Bernhard Wagner

 male/6’5/20yo

 Someone that will eventually face you at the Olympics, you think. He’s friendlier than a competitor has any right to be and reached out to you in your private messages on Blipsta. He always speaks in a really cute way, with all kinds of emojis. He complimented your technique and you got to talking. He made it so easy to open up to him.

You don’t know what Bernhard looks like, not really. He did tell you that he’s tall and has blonde hair, but you kind of expected that. You guess you just have to wait to meet him.

[onyourowndaisymae]

don't mind me... just thinking about the dateables slowly dropping the rest of their roster for you as they fall head over heels...

diavolo (you are here) // barbatos // simeon // solomon -- gn!mc, NSFW under the cut -- warning for mentions of intimacy without reciprocated feelings & the angst associated w it + minor s2 spoilers

diavolo, who is fascinated by humans. when he proposes the exchange program, he's being honest when he claims its to strengthen the bonds between all three realms. but he also has the selfish urge to have humans up close-- he just finds them so interesting. virtually powerless next to angels and demons, yet strong-willed and stubborn despite it all. solomon had been an object of his fascination for awhile, but that was a powerful sorcerer who was practically immortal. but you... like a child with a new puppy, diavolo had to resist the urge not to follow you everywhere you went, burning the observations into his brain for the future. barbatos was his saving grace, redirecting him when his question became too enthusiastic or overbearing, keeping him on task with the grace he'd been known for over the last few centuries. oops. well, at least he would have a whole year to get to know you better.

diavolo, who has high hopes for you. he sees the way you've intertwined yourself so thoroughly into the hearts of the demon brothers, how you've repaired their broken dynamic and made friends of all of them-- even lucifer! as the exchange program drew to a close, he was admittedly quite sad to see you go. he hadn't spent as much time with you as he wanted. he watches your goodbyes with the brothers with a somewhat envious eye. how unfair of his duties to keep him so occupied that he doesn't know you until you're leaving! how wicked, how cruel. he's throwing a pity party for himself behind a stoic expression. but regardless of his reservations, he sends you back to the human world with a smile and a promise that they'll all be waiting for you. and when you finally return to the devildom with solomon, popping in on a random student council meeting with an aloof grin, he can't help but thank fate for the gust of wind that dropped your information at lucifer's feet while they were searching for exchange students.

diavolo, who is royalty-- and looks the part. muscular frame, large stature, gorgeous face and body sculpted to perfection, with the wingspan and horns adorned with gold... it was clear he was a step above the rest. but being royalty had its drawbacks. the expectations that sat on his shoulders were heavy, but they were a burden he had to bear. a suitor of his was watching him from across the party with a knowing smile, eyes sharp, before finally summoning him with a single "come here" motion of their finger. and that was it. the death of his fun evening with friends for the sake of the kingdom. he spared you, the demon brothers, the angels, and the sorcerer one final look before joining the demon's side with a fake smile. he felt horrible. the demon did truly desire him, but diavolo couldn't muster up the same passion for them. not while they stowed away to his bedchambers. not while they were on their knees between his legs, lips and tongue kissing across his hardened length, deep groans rumbling in his chest. not while he returned the favor, enthusiastically lapping at their juices as he prepped them for his cock. and not while fucking them, either, their keens muffled into silk sheets as they clenched around his cock with another orgasm, his murmured praises almost lost in the heat of it all. as his arms wrap around the slumbering demon, tuckered out from a night of intimacy, he wonders if this is the life he's been resigned to. were demon politics so fickle that he'd truly have to marry not for love, but for the good of the devildom? he longed for the freedom of someone he knew... of you. his heart ached as his thoughts wandered to you. at every turn, you'd chosen the decision you wanted, even as the world closed in around you. you followed your heart through every crossroads and ended up on top at every turn. diavolo longed for the freedom you enjoyed-- and maybe that's why he was so fond of you.

diavolo, who eagerly awaits your next visit to the castle. lately he's found himself growing impatient for your visits, easily distracted by the knowledge that you'll soon be at the castle with him. it annoys barbatos to no end. this, he feels bad for... but really, can you blame him? he's giddy with excitement by the time you finally arrive, and it causes him to act familiar with you in a way he maybe shouldn't. he sits not opposite of you but next to you for tea, offering to pour your tea and add sugar cubes to your liking as he listens to you talk about the shenanigans that happened this week at the house of lamentation. your smile is contagious-- he finds himself mirroring it with warm cheeks. he doesn't know who starts it, whether it be his hand brushing against yours or your pinkie reaching for his, but soon your fingers were intertwined as colorful stories fell from your lips. you exchange words like that for awhile, neither one of you daring to ruin the moment by mentioning your hands. and your reward is even better-- eventually his large hand finds your cheek, stroking it with kind eyes for a moment before pressing a kiss to your lips. it's soft and hesitant, an unspoken desire, and he starts to pull away. but you don't let him. you lean in, lips moving against his, gripping his hand a little tighter to let him know you're on the same page. when the kiss is over and you two part, his head is surprisingly blank. all that pining really must have turned his brain to mush after all...

diavolo, who is so proud to call himself your partner. who would follow you to the end of time if you'd keep looking at him like that. greed and lust swirl in your gaze as you pant desperately, tugging a little on his hair when his movements still to watch you. his tongue laps desperately at your hole, chuckling to himself as you clench around nothing. his hands toy with the most sensitive part of yours sex, movements purposeful yet almost lazy in their pace. he's teasing you. his wings flutter a little when you tug at his hair again, and he pulls back enough to let you watch him stick two of his fingers into his mouth. from the movement of his cheeks, he's sure you notice the way his tongue swirls around them, drenching them in saliva before pulling the slick digits out. he eases one into your hole with a little bit of coaxing, the other running carefully along your sex in anticipation. they scissor in sync when they're both in you, purposefully stretching you open, lovingly prepping you for his cock. but it's never enough, is it? the same familiar stretch, that slight burn, makes your clench the sheets in your fists. his words are quiet and calm, sweet nothings against your shoulder and neck as he leaves a few kisses in his wake. he feels guilty each time you're intimate together for the pain he causes you-- he knows demons are bigger than humans, and that you're with him willingly, but the guilt lingers regardless. that is, until you give him permission to move. the first thrust makes you gasp, but after a few shallow movements your pretty eyes roll back into your head. this, he reminds himself, is why he loves fucking you. he hasn't moved beyond a shallow, careful pace, but you're already pulling at his shoulders and writhing underneath him. his golden eyes sparkle with fondness as he begins to move a little faster, hit a little deeper, watching you quickly become cockdrunk and forget the pain of the first few thrusts. he loves you so dearly that it makes his fingers tremble as he intertwines them with yours, pinning you down to his bed as he grinds into you. he is hopeless. a lost cause. walking around blindly, lovedrunk, powerful yet helpless to your whims-- lord diavolo would stop at nothing to bring the three realms to harmon, if only to justify keeping you by his side.

taglist for this series: @the-demonus-aunt // @scienceisfornerds // @hostilemakeover // @snow-fall1 // @kachan890 // @rphantom1 // @respitable // @deepseafragments // @niinian

[fir-fireweed]

I love how the ask button being labelled ‘Speak’ has significance for both of your IFs lol

also I FINALLY PLAYED CHAPTER 3 AND OMGDKJFDNVOJDFVNODJFVNVODFJN I AM UNWELL FOR CODA/TELLUS HAHAHA

literally every smidgen of resistenza that popped up as the chapter progressed (which is like. nearly all of it) even before the name Coda was mentioned had me perking up thinking “omg he’s here oh wait no that’s not even what he looks like” even though I already spoiled myself (completely my fault no worries) and knew he’s only revealed at the end. HIS VOICE!!! WHAT HAPPENED PLEASE DONT TELL ME HE PHYSICALLY/SURGICALLY ALTERED ITTTT FOR HIS SAFETY OR UNWILLINGLY OR BY SMOKE??? AAAAAAA

dakhdbiwydbiy I love all your characters so much. also the fight with vicente? did you have to describe them like that 🤨 but yes I got the tease flavour text from eva and I mean have you SEEN him and those pretty blue eyes??? yes so maybe he does stick around in my head, can you blame me dearest sister. if you’re so nosy about your adopted sister’s questionable love life go notice nik and figure that out first why don’t you. also not to mention the wing tattoo on vicente’s neck and that recent ask about what the ROs like 👀 would love to trace the outline of those feathers.

ANYWAYS I love love love the update and all the musical terms as someone who played the piano! I can’t wait to assassinate the regis do more things and spend more time as part of the resistanza (I don’t know if I’m spelling that right but if I am is that stanza bit on purpose? idk, it relates more to poetry than music but I think my brain is just a little overactive after your lovely story) so yeah! shame we couldn’t meet bayram in person again this chapter but all the time with the ROs and the lore and everything is just like wow.

can’t waitttt haha! shoutout to that other ask, because if you really do write a conversation with tellus into the earlier bonfire scene, I think I might go a bit more feral (the angst!! mc and us, the reader, will know him even better and it’ll make the loss + subsequent reunion even worse + emotionally contrasting omg) so that would be really cool if you do decide to do it. no pressure though, of course. anyways I love your writing so much as usual and I hope you have a good day. take care!

Hello, carp! Hehe, yeah I have a theme with words and speech, lol. Glad you like it! 😁

I’ve mentioned it a little so I don’t think it’s too spoilerish, but yes, the smoke and ash from the camp attack damaged Tellus’s vocal cords.

Yay! I’m glad you found the extra tease from Eva about Vicente! And you’ll definitely be able to tease her back. 🤭

I love how your mind went with the music and poetry, but Resistenza is just Italian for resistance. 😉

I looove the idea of adding Tellus to the bonfire scene! I’m like 99% sure I’m going to do it. I just need more time to write chapter 4 because one, it’s big, and two, it’s emotional. I’m about 2k into the start of the chapter and I’m already bawling, lol.

Thank you for this ask and for your kind words! Your comments always make me giggle. 🫶🏻

[fudanshidoublevision]

It's pretty funny how the three love interests have something in common 。。。。besides their obvious interest (Haley) and obsession (Double Vision and Ray) towards the MC of the game.

The three of them smoke, which might be something banal for some but I like to hold into small details like these and make up stuff.

Haley takes smoke breaks, Ray smokes when he is in your apartment and Double isn't shown smoking in the game but he does on his birthday illustration. ᶘ ⊙ᴥ⊙ᶅ

Not sure if that was on purpose or just a coincidence but either way, it makes sense to me.

Ray, especially, the fact that he smokes.

Considering that he spent most of his pre-teen and teenage years until he was 18 years old living with Steel Sheriff and remember, Steel Sheriff is a shitty person and a BAD influence, so it makes sense that maaaybe that bad habit was influenced by that horrendous man and Ray took a hold into it.

Ray strikes me as the type of guy who's addicted to nicotine and honestly? I don't blame him at all, that man went through so much shit since he came out of his mother's womb so if he EVEN chain smokes, it wouldn't faze me at all.

Not sure if Ray smokes only at night but someone dear to me does and well, the only time of the day Ray is completely free of any duty is at night, as far as i've seen? Also, smoking at night sounds...right to me, he takes notice of you and opens the window so he isn't stinking up your place...which is surprising, the only smokers I know always smoke in secluded places and I can smell it all the way into my bedroom. ʕʘ̅͜ʘ̅ʔ

I'm aware that nicotine has some benefits but we are talking about Ray, who is freaking Binary Star, HIS ABILITY???? EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. /j This man does not GAF about the side effects or the benefits of smoking. Out of the three I believe that Ray is free from any illnesses or any type of side effects, heh.

Now, Haley, they are shapeshifter...? Correct me if I'm wrong, im an amateur on the Haley department. Crazy idea but imagine if they smoke on their cat form, holy fucking shit. Their brain, gastrointestinal system or even their heart is not safe though...but I believe that they can easily shift into any animal with the strongest lungs ever and live another day without being worried about any complications? Huh, this sounds batshit crazy so I think I'll stop writing this part.

Like Ray, Haley seems to smoke as a sedative, what if they smoke herbal cigarettes? Also, I believe that they can easily quit if they want to (heh, now that I'm reading this part i forgot that this is something most addicts say, LOL.) , which I beg to differ when it comes to Ray or Double, I don't judge them, just an observation I guess.

At last, my favorite character and current obsession, Double Vision.

Cigarette smoking, yeah but what about vaping? He looks like the type of guy that would vape or maybe is it too tame for him? Maybe he wants something stronger. Wait, does anyone really need a reason to smoke? ಠಿ_ಠ

People say that vaping is less hazardous than smoking but to me? It's the same thing, most e-cigarretes contain nicotine but yeah, you are inhaling smoke from burning tobacco when you smoke a cigarette. I don't know anything about vaping. It's pretty popular in my country though, never tried it but my friend told me that vaping feels and tastes different from smoking, so I believe their judgement.

Forgive my yapping, like I was saying! He isn't safe from the lung cancer, at all. Yeah, this man can do sick tricks with the smoke, for sure... I'm not going to name any because I might be wrong but you name it and maaaaaaaybe he would be capable of doing it, if you can do something for him back, of course. Oh, I'm 100% sure this freakazoid throws the smoke in your face on purpose, I find that hot actually...if only my nostrils and eyes could say the same about that. If he does that, I'll be coughing like I have asthma until I die.

Hmm, I can't think of when he started smoking...maybe on his teenage years? After all, I think it was at that time that he started to get along with shady people and ugly business. The power of influence and their ambience might be a big factor of this habit on these guys. Heavy on Ray.

That's everything I could think of. For now.

If you are a real person, don't smoke, I guess?. Do whatever you want BUT DON'T BE TELLING ANYONE THAT TUMBLR USER fudanshidoublevision encouraged you to do it.

If you are fictional character, yassss smoke all you want beautiful inexistent individual, you don't exist after all!

GODDAMN!!!!!! I MIGHT START SMOKING RIGHT NOW IF I CAN LOOK THIS HOT 😍😍😍 GIVE ME THAT CIGARETTE 🔥🔥🔥

[we-rice-boi]

If someone asked why I like Sylus...

Warning: not proofread, silly rambles

I'd say it's because the man makes me feel so incredibly comfortable that I could care less about my silly insecurities.

If you asked if there was an other reason I'd say it's because (from the beginning) that man reminds me of a dragon and I flippin love dragons.

Ever since I was a young ball of undiagnosed autism and adhd, my hyperfixation has always been dragons. I'd draw them for hours, research the mythology, the history, how that impacted their shape and powers. From the age of 6 I could name at least 10 types of dragons and give you a full history on, at least, 5 of them. So it's no surprise that Sylus is my all time favorite.

I bring this up because what if MC/ reader had a hyperfixation like mine? Say Sylus asks you to tell him the top 3 reasons why you like him and your respond with:

You make me feel safe

You make me feel loved

And you remind me of some of my favorite dragons...

Then you just go off on this tangent about what dragons he reminds you of and why you love them so much without realizing how spot-on you are. I can just see Sylus's face change from utter bewilderment and confusion to adoration when he hears you gush about your special interest.

Like after being something that people despise so much, being treated like an unforgivable monster that people would rather have dead, he is finally loved wholeheartedly... all of him. To hear someone chatter on about the traits he once despised, in such a positive way just heals the little hatchling in him who once tried to cut his own horns off.

At that point, he can't help but cut you off with a flurry of smooches. You are far too cute for words and he can't help the amount of giddiness he feels after hearing you speak like that.

Mc: "H-hey wait- I didn't even get to the best part!"

Sylus: "I've heard all I need to know, sweetie"

I had to write this ramble before bed. I'll probs come back and do a proofread in the morning but as always I needed this out of my head before it consumed me. I'm thinking of doing another post going into detail about the dragons Sylus resembles and my silly Lil theories. Alas, that is for another day. Enjoy my brain dump!!

Done and edited 😌

Also, let me know if yall would like to see a more detailed writing of this prompt, I'll put it on my ever-growing list.

[kiame-sama]

Can you give us some Human Lore related to the Great Seven? As you mentioned how the Queen of Hearts is very strict about Humans being protected, even making a bunch of rules to protect them (So no doubt if Reader gets bullied while Riddles’ around he’ll instantly collar the perpetrators)

I’m curious as to see if there are any myths about how the other Great Seven treat or view Humans

This AU has me in a chokehold and I can’t wait for more parts! I love every part and your art of the characters is amazing!

I kinda wrote a little idea for the Righteous Judge and how he felt about Humans (You can ignore or change it if you want! Since this IS your AU)

The Righteous Judge was known for being fair towards Humans as he believed they should be treated equally, as he’d saw how Humans could not only adapt, but even help Monsters settle their differences, and they could do it all without magic

As such he made laws to protect Humans as he thought highly of Humanity being the key to improve civilization, as while they didn’t have any magic, their bonds with each other and other Monsters helped accomplish any task or threat thrown at them

He believed Humans were pure because they weren’t born with the savage instinct like many Monsters have, as he saw Humans more likely to show compassion, mercy, kindness and empathy, unlike Monsters who are more prone to use violence, aggression and pure power to get what they want

Legend has it the Righteous Judge wept in sorrow when Humanity went Extinct, as he believed Humanity could’ve helped Monsters learn how to better themselves

It’s also believed that the Righteous Judge’s son was a Human, which could explain why he was so devoted to defend and help Humans

Maybe because of this Fleur City is known for their rituals, celebrations and festivals to honor the legacy Humans left behind, to honor how the Righteous Judge strived so hard to help Humans

Sorry, my brain went ham as I’m prone to overthinking because of my Autism (I love your Autistic Works as they’re incredibly relatable, like with Floyd and his squeezes since I love extra tight hugs)

Absolutely agree for the Righteous Judge and this would no doubt translate to Rollo's own infatuation and obsession with this little Human. I would bet that if Human MC from the AU visited Fleur city during the Topsy Turvey Day, they would be automatically crowned and honored in the festival as even the Righteous Judge loved the Humans he wept so heavily for.

The Queen of Hearts was known for her love of Humans and had several Human pets that she cherished deeply. She was known to only pardon her Humans from being beheaded as they were such an endearing little species and she couldn't stay angry with her Humans for long. There are no less than 50 rules regarding the proper treatment of humans as The Queen wanted to ensure her beloved pets were kept safe no matter what. All Humans were declared as a protected species in the Queendom of Roses, and harming or abusing one was punishable by death. These laws are still in place despite Humans being extinct for centuries just in the event that a Human could possibly still be alive somewhere.

The King of Beasts doesn't have any mention of humans in any of his stories, hence why many beast men were content to treat Humans as cattle and regarded humans as a delicacy to feast upon. Over the years as Humans became more and more endangered, the Black market for Humans became more than a little cut-throat. Humans were food for so long, that when they were declared extinct, literal riots broke out and what small remaining meat sold for millions. Knock off meat was popular for a while, and Sunset Savana (and various other locations with high beastman populations) admitted to being somewhat at fault for the rapid extinction of Humans. Now there is a global ban on the buying, selling, or trading of Human artifacts/remains.

The Sea Witch's story is deeply intertwined with the presence of Humans, as it was a Human the princess wished to see and marry, leading to her making a deal with the Sea Witch. Many merfolk regard Humans as the peak standard of beauty as a result of this story. Many Human-like monsters are treated with the same kind of awe by merfolk for being so close to a Human in form.

The Sorcerer of the Sands had many tricks and was very knowledgeable, so of course he knew about humans in great detail. Some stories even claim that the Sorcerer sought the council of Humans for their unusual ability to resolve conflict in warring species. Despite their lack of Magic, humans were admirable enough to be in the council of the Sorcerer and were considered to be quite wise for their continued persistence among stronger species.

The Fairest Queen- the most beautiful of all and a wickedly powerful Harpy in her own right- liked the featherless bipeds known as Humans. Though they were clumsy and sometimes pig-faced, she viewed their ambition and tenacity in high regard. Such creatures that held on so tightly to their place in the world despite the other species beating them back certainly earned the respect of the Fairest Queen.

The Thorn Fairy was known for her many boons granted to Human kind. As Humans did not posses magic, they needed all the aid they could get and the Thorn Fairy was all too eager to aid. It is said that any Human the Thorn Fairy blessed became a member of her court, if not in title than in spirit, as the Thorn fairy adored the ignoble little species despite their fragility and flaws. Though she is the spirit of nobility and power, the Thorn Fairy herself smiled kindly upon her little Humans and offered aid to them when she could.

[anna-the-undertaker]

No one fucks with Luke, not with MC around.

So I'm the second eldest (eldest girl) out of all the kids in my family. And I grew up being taught that you gotta protect the younger kids at all cost, whether they are related to you or not (Im from the deep south so thats also part of it). So I know that if it were me in the Devildom, I would end up super protective of Luke. My brain would automatically associate him as being sorta like my younger brother. That kid would kick my maternal instincts into high gear.

The classroom buzzed with the usual chatter as demons and angels alike milled about before the lecture. MC walked in, their bag slung over one shoulder, scanning the room for a seat. They hadn’t expected anything out of the ordinary today—just another class in the Devildom’s peculiar take on higher education. But then they heard it: a sharp, angry voice that cut through the noise, followed by the unmistakable sound of a chair scraping against the floor.

MC’s gaze snapped to the source of the commotion. Their eyes widened as they saw a demon towering over Luke, his fist raised, his face twisted in anger. Luke, ever the brave little angel, stood his ground, but it was clear he was outmatched. The demon snarled, “You think you can mouth off to me, you little brat? I’ll teach you some respect!”

Time seemed to slow as a surge of protective fury flooded through MC. Without thinking, they dropped their bag and stormed across the room, already summoning the power within them. They didn’t even bother to conceal the venom in their voice as they yelled, “Oh, please do it! Please hit him! I want to see you do it!” Their words were sharp, challenging, daring the demon to make a move.

The classroom fell silent as everyone turned to watch, eyes wide with shock and fear. The demon hesitated, his raised fist wavering as he realized that this wasn’t just some ordinary human standing before him. MC’s eyes blazed with a dangerous light, their hand already glowing with the beginnings of a spell. The air crackled with energy as they prepared to summon one of the brothers, anyone who could deal with this threat.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” MC continued, their voice rising with each word. “Hit him, you bastard. Put your hands on him, I dare you!”

The demon’s friend, who had been watching from the sidelines, suddenly shot to his feet, panic written all over his face. He had seen MC’s power before—had heard the stories of what they could do when pushed too far. “Wait, don’t! Don’t hurt him!” he pleaded, his voice trembling with fear. “We didn’t mean it! He didn’t mean it!”

MC’s gaze snapped to the other demon, their eyes cold as ice. “Oh, I’m not gonna hurt him,” they snarled, their voice low and dangerous. “I’m gonna kill him for putting his hands on Luke.”

The words sent a shiver through the room. The demon who had raised his fist paled, realizing far too late that he had seriously miscalculated. He quickly lowered his hand, stepping back as if to distance himself from the threat he had foolishly provoked. But it was too late. MC’s fury was a storm, and it wasn’t easily quelled.

Luke, still standing his ground, looked up at MC with wide eyes. He had never seen them like this—so fierce, so ready to protect him at any cost. “MC…” he whispered, his voice barely audible over the tension in the room.

MC didn’t take their eyes off the demon. “You don’t ever lay a hand on him, do you hear me?” They took a step forward, and the demon stumbled back, nearly tripping over his own feet in his haste to put distance between himself and MC. “If you so much as think about hurting him again, I swear by everything holy and unholy in all three realms, you’ll regret it.”

The demon’s friend tried to intervene, his hands raised in a placating gesture. “We’re sorry! He didn’t know who he was messing with! Just—please, let him go. We won’t bother Luke again, I swear!”

MC held their glare for a long, tense moment before finally allowing the energy to dissipate, the spell fading from their hand. The air in the room seemed to release a collective breath, the tension easing slightly as MC took a step back. The demon, pale and shaken, quickly ducked his head and muttered an apology before scrambling out of the classroom, his friend hot on his heels.

MC watched them go, their expression hard and unyielding until the door slammed shut behind them. Only then did they turn to Luke, their fierce demeanor softening into one of concern. “You okay, Luke?” they asked, their voice gentle now, a stark contrast to the wrath they had just unleashed.

Luke nodded, though he looked a bit shaken. “Yeah… thanks, MC. I didn’t think he’d actually… you know.”

MC smiled, ruffling his hair affectionately. “No one’s gonna mess with you while I’m around, got it?”

Luke smiled back, relief washing over him. “Got it.”

As they walked together to find a seat, the classroom slowly returned to its usual noise, though there was an undeniable tension in the air. The other students whispered among themselves, stealing glances at MC. The story of what had just happened would spread quickly, adding to MC’s growing reputation in the Devildom as someone not to be trifled with.

But for MC, it was simple. No one messed with Luke—not on their watch.

[npuppet]

Twin

Love and Deepspace fic

Pt 1 | Pt 2

Word Count: 6.2k

Pairing: Dawnbreaker x reader x Zayne… kinda

Content Warning: reader is MC, reader is not in a relationship with any of the LI’s though it’s implied she’s interacted with them, mentions of Xavier, lots of world building (it doesn’t pick up till the end I’m sorry lol), minor depictions of violence/combat, I make up some world building things (like how the resonance evol works, etc), I don’t know how to write medical scenes (:

A/N: this is my first fic and I don’t know what I’m doing, this is just really self indulgent. There’s going to be a part two where things really pick up. This is also lightly proofread lol

Summary: His world fell apart faster than he could try and save it. Wanderers and Abominations filled the streets, screams echoing off the empty concrete walls.

Standing alone in the middle of the main road, all hope slipped through his fingers. One shove from something sent he careening into a Protofield, the last glimpses of his city engulfed in flames burned into his eyes.

Or

What if Dawnbreaker arrived in our Linkon through a time warped Protofield after his world fell apart?

———————————————————————————

You weren’t expecting to get a life changing mission today. Not that anyone really expects that. No, you in fact would’ve much rather gone home and enjoyed some R&R as it was the final work day before your vacation. You already had plans lined up with Tara and other friends from the Association to go out and enjoy the night. You needed to get rid of the knots in your shoulders and back from slouching all day. Headaches were now common, probably from dehydration and lack of sleep. Soul sucking, all of it.

A huff left your lips as you stood in front of the elevator, impatiently waiting for your freedom from work. That is until Jenna came running out of her office and straight to you, calling your name in urgency. It was definitely out of character for the usually put together Captain.

There was an emergency that had just reached the Hunters Association and in turn UNICORNS. A massive Protofield had manifested close to a No-Hunt Zone, but was still close enough to the outskirts of the city to cause alarm. It was all hands on deck, including those going on vacation unfortunately.

Jenna told you some more details before moving back to her office to direct Hunter traffic and send out reports. The elevator dinged and as you walked inside, you already started rerouting your attention back to work brain, thinking of what needed to be done. Your watch dinged a couple of times buzzing with recent field reports from the first response Hunters.

It was a nightmare out there. Wanderers of all classes were pouring out of the Protofield and it was already looking a multi-day operation ahead. Another sigh made you tilt your head back in annoyance. You knew this was important but it didn’t soften the blow of the thought of your vacation days being used up for this.

Several pings were being sent to request reinforcements, just serving to spur your legs to run faster as you made your way to your bike in the Hunter Association’s garage.

Speeding down the road, there were other Hunters on their bikes en route to the disaster too. Traffic was temporarily rerouted as it was a city wide emergency, allowing Hunters and emergency personnel to quickly get where they needed to go. Sirens somewhere off in the distance were drowned in the sound of wind whipping past your face, pressing against the helmet on your head.

It was a warm night, lights of the city streaking past, blurring into a beautiful watercolor mess.

You could already feel the adrenaline start coursing through you, the familiar buzz along with the roar of the bike preparing you for the battle to come.

Thoughts were spinning in your head. How did a Protofield of this caliber get so close to the city where Flux Stabilizers were? What were you going to find when you got there? How long is this going to take?

Hopefully Xavier was already on the scene and helping. Being a part of Alpha Team, it was probably going to be you and your team’s responsibility to enter the Protofield and destroy the Protocore Clusters inside, effectively cutting off the Metaflux supply to most of the Wanderers and the Protofield. There had to be Protocore Clusters inside you thought. The severity of the situation could only be because of a buildup of Metaflux that had gone unnoticed.

It took only ten minutes to reach the outskirts of the city thanks to your speeding and the clear roads. Other Hunters arriving with you leapt off their bikes, haphazardly leaving them behind as they took out their weapons and readied their Evols. You whipped off your helmet just as a myriad of Hunter Watches around you chimed. Glancing down at your watch you saw various messages being sent at the same time.

One was that you were approaching a No-Hunt Zone and confirm you had a partner with you. Another was a hastily put together field report from Hunters gathered ahead. Due to the sheer scale of Wanderers coming out of the Protofield, some had begun slipping through the current defenses and arriving Hunters should be prepared immediately.

Sounds of gunshots and metal echoed off the top of the trees that surrounded the No-Hunt Zone, the out of place swirl of white Metaflux peeking out from behind the trees hinting at just how large this Protofield was.

There was no time to dwell on that as the shriek of Wanderers breaching the tree line alerted everyone. The closest Hunters engaged in battle as others started to quickly group up and head into the trees, hoping to reinforce the defenses to prevent Wanderers from reaching the city, you being one of them.

Another chime from your watch made you slow a bit. It was from Xavier, notifying you that indeed, Alpha Team was expected to make their was over to the Protofield in preparation to enter and destroy whatever was in there. It was a bit relieving to know Xavier had already joined the front lines. He was the most capable Hunter you knew so you knew your fellow Hunters were in good hands.

A rumble to your left startled you out of reading the rest, whipping your head to see a Malachite making a beeline for you. It wobbled slightly, something your sharp eyes caught onto immediately. There seemed to be something on its body but you couldn’t make out what it was in the shade of the trees. Whatever, not important right now. Flicking your wrist, you apperated your guns to your hands in a flash and made swift work of the Wander along with another Hunter who slowed down when they noticed you stopped.

The two of you continued running, your breath starting to come out in short breaths from the cardio as you finally reached a clearing where the Protofield loomed ominously, low grade Wanderers still coming out in droves.

Never had you seen Metaflux condensed in such a way in your career of being a Hunter. It lashed out violently every time a Wanderer stepped out of its bright light, seemingly having a mind of its own. Something in your chest twisted, your heart beating not just from running, but from fear. If you and your fellow Hunters couldn’t deal with this, it could bring the DAA and even the Farspace Fleet into this mess.

Don’t think of what-if’s, think of now.

Shouts and shrieks filled your head, flashes of Evol and Metaflux disorienting you before you could take another step.

Out of your peripheral, you see him. Xavier, dealing with a larger Wanderers by himself. His graceful steps outmaneuver the poor beast by a long run. Every swing by the Wanderer was returned threefold, light clashing harshly against the trees. It was mesmerizing the way Xavier was able to move, using his Evol to the fullest extent. One final leap forward, his sword poised right at the Wanderers Protocore and it was over.

Taking a deep breath he took a step back, wiping sweat from his brow before catching you staring from the tree line. His mouth quirked up into a warm smile before motioning you to follow him, making your way through the chaos to rendezvous with the rest of Alpha Team.

It was a hasty plan but better than nothing. Being Alpha Teams strongest duo, you, Xavier and one other Hunter would strong arm your way into the Protofield and do as much reconnaissance as you could before retreating back. From that data, headquarters could determine the best course of action and start sending over energy stabilizers to deploy in the Protofield to reduce the amount of Wanderers being made by the chaotic Metaflux.

It was decided, that is until an ear splitting roar cut through the clearing, practically shaking leaves off of the trees. You had to cover your ears, heartbeat thrumming in your chest at the sound. Every Hunters Watch in the vicinity rang out with a warning of the powerful Wanderers incoming appearance.

One clawed leg, then the other. A horned head poked out, followed by a feral snarl. The Protofield swirled violently, charging the air with hair raising energy. A rush of cool air brushed past your face before the warm air of the summer night swallowed it back up.

Another roar, this one piercing through the clearing like a gunshot, announcing its arrival. It shook its scales before opening its mouth and sending blinding pulses of Metaflux everywhere, forcing Hunters to scramble out of the way or get vaporized. There was something on its scales, something shiny but the ever darkening sky made it hard to see.

Xavier was the first to move towards the Wanderer, you the second. You feet seemed to move before your brain decided it was a good idea or not. Regardless, you had to back up Xavier, no matter what.

He immediately aimed for its chest but the dragon caught on fast. It swung its body around in a circle, using the momentum to whirl its tail like a whip straight at Xavier. Hunters still close enough dived to the ground to avoid getting cut in half, some still getting sent flying back into trees and into the ground. Xavier had to maneuver fast, opting to use his Evol to jump higher.

Stopping a safe distance away from the dragons melee range, you took one deep breath and used your Evol to reach out to Xavier. It felt like wires searching for a connection in vast network of signals. Chaotic but you learned to shift through the meaningless information and focus on who you were targeting, namely Xavier. Once you found him, it was like fresh air filled your lungs as you could feel his calm confidence wash over you, ground you and allowing you to finally focus.

The main power of your Evol traveled through your connection, vibrating with power. Xavier felt his Evol shift in that mind numbing familiar way. It was close to intoxicating how your Evol strengthened him to new heights, his senses sharpening to the point he could hear a pin drop before it even hit the ground.

You felt his Evol envelop you, hugging you close. A sword started to form in your hands, useless at your current position but you didn’t worry about that. As you lifted it in the air, Xavier’s Evols swirled around the both of you, coalescing above the dragon. It shined so brightly that you just closed your eyes and focused on strengthening Xavier as much as you could.

A massive sword, bordering on a claymore, formed right above the dragon, poised at its back. As you plunged your sword into the ground with a vengeance, Xavier followed suit, forcing the light sword to fall like a guillotine blade. The dragon roared as it tried to move fast enough to avoid it but the sword still managed to slice through one of its wings. The Wanderer wailed as Xavier used his own blade to cut even further, not enough to reach its Protocore, but enough to make it focus solely on Xavier.

You were about to follow up and resonate again but the rest of your team called out to you. Since the monster was distracted with Xavier, it was the best time to try and get into the Protofield. Much to your dismay, you knew Xavier would be able to handle it, especially with the dozens of other Hunters to back him up. Regretfully, you stepped away and chose another Hunter to accompany you.

Stepping closer to the Protofield, the other members of your team provided support until your bodies were consumed by the Metaflux of the Protofield and you felt that familiar free fall sensation.

————————————————————————

The first thing that registered is the freezing air that bit at your skin as soon as you opened your eyes. There was no snow on the ground but your breaths came out in white puffs, cold gusts of wind biting at your face. The warmth from the summer left your skin in a matter of moments.

The second was the Knave coming right at you, barreling towards the portal leading to the clearing back in Linkon. You didn’t even have time to summon your guns so you did the next best thing, kick the Wanderer in the chest, sending it a few steps back. With space, you whipped your hand out and shot two Evol bullets into its chest, watching it dissipate into a puff of Metaflux.

The Harriers in your hands felt heavier as you heard nothing but the rumbles and cries of Wanderers echoing off the rock walls inside the Protofield.

You were standing in a ravine looking space, the cliffs above you reaching high above. The only way was forward towards the cacophony of Wanderer sounds. The other two prepped their Evols and weapons before all of you quickly and quietly set off, the cold now sinking into your bones.

You had to deal with more Wanderers than you’d care to admit even if you were trying to be stealthy. The only cover you could sneak around were dusty rock protrusions that littered the gravelly path, leading you further away from the portal.

The violent pulse of Metaflux was no better inside than it had been outside. In fact, it felt worse, making hairs raise on your arm. Your Hunters Watch, now on silent, kept flashing with warnings of severe Metaflux exposure along with personalized notes that your Protocore Syndrome might flare if you stayed too long. You ignored it as you continued forward, shivering as you were not dressed for the freezing temperatures.

It had only been about two minutes before you started to notice something. It was small at first but you found yourself glancing at the ground more, looking at black crystal like spikes jutting out of the ground. They were clear and crystalline, only clouded by the swirl of color which was reminiscent of smoky quartz. In the light of the Protofield, the glittering of the crystals was hard to ignore anymore as they grew in size with each passing step. One of your teammates broke off a sample and packaged it safely for analysis later.

Another thing of note was the sound of Wanderer cries getting louder as you made your way further. Moving faster to hopefully get this over with so you could return to the warm embrace of Linkon, you picked up on the sound of battle. It was faint, only echoing off the top of the tall ravine walls still surrounding you but it was there.

Getting to a crossroads, you quickly checked your watch, the other two fending off a Wanderer that got too close. The paths seemed to all converge in the same spot but with varying distances that would take more or less time.

Since your strength comes from being with a partner with an Evol, your group decides that someone will go the shortest route, you will take the middle, and final path your last companion. It covers the most ground and if the end destination has Wanderers or some threat, the first to arrive would be first to engage, with you and the other Hunter as back up not far behind.

Giving each other quick nods, all of you dove into your respective path, moving smoothly through the freezing air, the sound of Wanderers dying getting closer. As you got closer the Metaflux seemed angrier, half-formed Wanderers appearing all around you before getting sucked back into the chaos.

Unconsciously you moved faster, weaving through rocks and black crystals until you heard it. At first you thought it was your imagination, but the sound kept singing in the air.

The shrill sound of an Evol being thrown around in tandem with the sound of Wanderers dying. Was someone already here before you?! How could they have made it so far alone??

Picking up the pace, something in your stomach sank. You didn’t know why at the time, just that you wanted to get to whoever was fighting to help them.

The cold was getting almost unbearable at this point. Your arms and thighs were starting to get itchy from the wind whipping around you and your fingers were on the verge of frostbite it seemed. If it wasn’t for you running and forcing your body to make more heat, you would’ve shriveled into a ball and succumbed to the cold you thought.

Finally, a clearing broke your train of thought. You quickly ducked behind a rock just big enough to hide your body. The battle unfolding in front of you was a brutal one. You couldn’t see who was fighting yet on account of several dozens of Wanderers blocking your view. They seemed to be coming from above the cliffs, jumping down to join the horde, drawn by an invisible force.

You jumped as a massive spike drove itself out of the ground, impaling several Wanderers before shattering, leaving nothing but glittering shards whipping around in the air. That’s when it hit you.

That was ice.

The spikes littering the ground was ice. Black ice and now that you were noticing it, seemed to blink with a dim light, like a dying pulse. No wonder the sound of the Evol being thrown around sounded familiar.

It was just like Zayne’s.

Yet different, it sounded colder, if that makes sense. It had more bite to it, the sound of the ice cutting through the air like it was made to kill.

The ice was different but a nagging feeling threatened to consume you.

It felt like the time Zayne’s Evol spiraled out of control when you two were kids. You were too young to remember everything, just that Zayne had to see a specialist to help him work through controlling his Evol, and even then he still struggled. You could see it in his face. The memory of those blue towers of ice never quite left your head and now here they were again. This time swirling with black and gray, the light shining off of them harsh against your eyes.

Moving with purpose, you tried to circle around the clearing to get a better idea of what the Wanderers were so insistent on getting. It couldn’t be Zayne. He was back at the hospital, he even messaged you earlier in the day to remind you of your appointment you set up during your vacation.

You were halfway around the clearing when the Wanderers parted in such a way that you caught a brief glimpse of what they were attacking. A figure, their clothes stark black against the dusty ground, black as the ice erupting from the ground, keeping the Wanderers a bay before they swallowed up the space again.

Further and further until you needed to climb up a small ledge to get a better view. As your head peaked out to finally see who it was, you could feel your body go numb.

For the whole time your mind raced to make sense of what was happening, you couldn’t even feel the cold anymore. It would’ve been preferable actually, had you only had to focus on not getting hypothermia.

There, fighting for his life, was Zayne.

Zayne.

There was no mistaking his midnight black hair that stuck to his head from sweat. The way his nose and jaw looked even at a distance. Even the way he fought was similar, if not more precise and honed.

Your arms shot up to propel your body forward to rush over and help already, but your Hunter instincts managed to stop you before you went careening off to your hypothetical death.

This wasn’t right.

You knew that wasn’t Zayne. Your Zayne. The ice, instead of the familiar baby blue you knew was replaced with a lifeless black, shining like a predators eyes looking at prey. Even if that man had his face, under every circumstance, that wasn’t Zayne.

But it hurt. It hurt so much to see the face of your childhood friend twisted in agony as he fought for his life.

Frost threatened to consume his face, the rest of his body covered with dark clothes, his trench coat whipping around from the wind caused by his Evol. His ragged and uneven breaths came out in billows of white air through his clenched teeth. His hands shook uncontrollably as more and more ice poured out from his fingertips, skin red and cracked.

Ice pooled under his feet, locking him in place and keeping him upright.

Help him. Help him. Help him.

Everything around you slowed down, adrenaline and panic making your heart beat out of your chest, your already numb hands getting clammy.

No, that wasn’t your Zayne. It could be a Metaflux hallucination or a trap set by a high ranking Wanderer for all you know.

But it was Zayne, the second most important man in your life.

From lying on your stomach, you were on your feet and jumping from the ledge in seconds. Circling around, Wanderers caught onto your presence quick but you didn’t care. Tunnel vision consumed your sight as you shot off round after round into Wanderers, stealth be damned.

You could no longer see the man that shared Zayne’s face but from the pause in the sound of ice flying in the air, he seemed to have caught onto your presence as well. Sprinting through, not caring if you killed a Wanderer or not when you shot them, you breached the line of Wanderers to where he was standing inhumanly fast.

You didn’t even notice you were trying to resonate with him while reaching out, already aware your sudden appearance distracted him, allowing Wanderers to get too close. One Knave managed to strike his arm while he wasn’t looking, blood spurting from the wound, causing him to recoil.

As three other Wanderers prepared to strike him, your hand barely brushed against his hand causing your Evol to explode around the two of you.

Your connection with the man felt so familiar, like you were just resonating with Zayne. It was effortless almost, your Evols power pouring into the man like he was grappling for more power.

But unlike how you resonate with Zayne or even Xavier, a frigid cold suddenly coiled in your chest, making you gasp in pain. It pulsed in your heart painfully tearing its way through your body, like frostbite on your internal organs. You doubled over into the man’s chest though you didn’t even register it, only seeing a white blur in your vision.

A beat passed and the pain subsided somewhat as you stopped resonating.

Silence filled the space, save a subtle whine of ice on the cusp of cracking.

You were on the ground, trembling hands holding onto you tight. Taking shaky breathes, you opened your eyes when you didn’t realize you closed them.

In front of you was him, Zayne. Your eyes drank in his presence and you spaced out for a moment. The hands that held you bit into your skin from how cold they were but you didn’t care. Slowly looking up you met his eyes.

His face was contorted into a tired and somewhat desperate frown, eyebrows furrowed and eyes squinting down at you, dark circles encapsulating his gorgeous hazel-jade irises.

His eyes told a chaotic story. One full of pain, confusion, fear, and… relief? Wonder? His breath was still shaky but he seemed to be more alert, attentive to you.

“It’s…you.” His voice was gravelly and hoarse. The words didn’t even register in your mind.

Finally seeing him up close, you could start to see things more clearly. His expressions were more open and honest as you could practically see the inner turmoil boil over in his face. Wrinkles littered his face like he spent everyday scowling and his hair was longer and more disheveled than your Zayne’s.

But it was still him.

It was making you sick how this man could bring such warm comfort and gut wrenching confusion at the same time.

The call of your name broke you out of your trance. It was your teammates, desperately calling out for you. It was only then when you tear your eyes away that you gawked at the sight before you.

Impossibly tall ice spikes reached towards the Protofield sky, twisting like vines into one another, shimmering with life and energy. Multiple towers of icy walls enclosed the two of you, no Wanderers in sight. Your mouth was left agape, the display of power evident in the wake of your resonance.

You quickly called out to your fellow Hunters, your own voice hoarse from the amount of power you expended to the man across from you. As you tried to stand, Zayne mirrored your moves, keeping you steady as you both stood.

With the wave of his hands, he dispelled the icy walls with ease, a million pieces of ice brushing past you. The two Hunters stood in shock as you came into view again, standing next to a stranger in the clearing. They ran over to you in alarm, uneasy at the sight of the man holding you.

After assuring them that you were fine and the other Zayne wasn’t a threat, all four of you turned your heads to the sound of a vicious roar that echoed off the walls of the Protofield. Whatever it was large and a threat. It was time to go. Your Watches had gathered more than enough data to send back to the Association. Your job was done.

“We need to get out.” You murmured to no one in particular. There was pressure mounting in your chest but you pushed it down. You were almost done, you could hold out till the end. Starting to move, you weaved back the way you came, head floating off somewhere else from exhaustion.

You didn’t realize you had grabbed onto the other Zayne’s hand until you were back at the exit to the Protofield. He had been quietly following you, silently observing you in reverence.

He couldn’t believe it. After all these years. Since he first saw you fifteen years ago. He was with you, touching you even. Your faint scent filled his senses, how your face looked up at him after you resonated. He didn’t know what resonating was but he knew that he had never felt as close to someone as he did in that moment. And he would do almost anything to feel that again. To just be close to you. Just about anything.

Just as you were about to step through he stopped. You, finally noticing you were still holding his hand, quickly let go but looked at him in confusion. He glanced down at you again, his eyes briefly betraying the longing he so desperately felt, before looking away back at where the roar came from.

“Go.” He said quietly.

“…what?” He refrained from looking at you again, knowing his resolve would break if he did.

“I said go.” It was his fault for this mess. His fault that he couldn’t stop the Abominations from overrunning his city. His fault for now dragging you into this.

He thought the punishment of having to fight Wanderers till his death was enough. But now, he had to live with knowing you were almost within his grasp, which hurt more than all of his years of being Dawnbreaker combined.

“You can’t be serious.” You said, the edge in your voice evident as you try to understand why he’s acting like this now. He just furrowed his brow and closed his eyes.

You couldn’t really rationalize why you wanted him to come with at the moment. Ever since resonating with him, there was this pull to him you couldn’t shake. But be as he may look like, feel like, hell even strangely enough smell like him, this was not your Zayne. What consequences would you have to face to bring him back through the Protofield?

What would your Zayne think?

“You heard me.” He said shortly. He was getting on your nerves, like when Dr. Zayne would get on your case about taking care of your heart over and over again.

“Zayne-“ you stopped short. The name just slipped past your lips. You didn’t know if this man’s name was Zayne, but his eyes snapped back to you, quelling the thought fast.

“You will die if you stay. Don’t play hero when you have other options.” Rich coming from you.

Both of you were too stubborn for your own good but he had a sinking feeling you would stay back with him to make a point. He couldn’t let that happen.

Pinching the bridge of his nose he took one final deep breath before shaking his head. You knew you had won this time, but a sharp pain in your chest spurred you to get out quickly, pulling the good doctor’s doppelgänger behind you.

————————————————————————

Staggering out of the Protofield, you could already hear that battle outside had calmed down. Only the occasional cry of a Wanderer echoed in the trees but mostly it was cleanup now. Injured Hunters coalesced in groups under hastily put up tents if they were able, emergency services already here and helping. Feeling the grass under your feet and the warm air surge around you melted some of the recent stress off of you.

Your Hunters Watch beeped at you, first telling you that the data it collected was being sent back to the Association. The second message was another personalized message saying you needed to get check out by a medical professional asap after being exposed to such large amounts of Metaflux for an extended period.

Anyone but Dr. Zayne. You could already hear his even toned voice scolding you, looking you up and down in disapproval.

Speaking of Zayne…

You looked back at the man you forced to come with you. His eyes were glued to the city peeking over the tops of the trees, a faraway look stealing his attention.

You were now aware as you felt sensation return to your limbs that your chest still felt freezing, burning even with how cold it was. From inside the Protofield and how cold the other Zayne was making it with his Evol you hadn’t noticed.

You turned to talk to your companions but the words caught in your throat as the world spun around you. A strangled gurgle left your lips as the cold enveloped your body, pulsing like the black ice did inside the Protofield. Your companions and the other Zayne scrambled to catch you, alerting medical personal that you needed help.

Your lungs stabbed at you every breath you took. Cold burned at your fingertips, traveling slowly upwards.

Was this what he felt in the Protofield? What the other Zayne went through while actively fighting?

“Dr. Zayne!!”

That snapped you out of your haze of pain fast.

Your head turned to the side to see none other than your primary care physician, dressed in field medic clothes you’ve only seen in passing when the two of you were dispatched to a far away mission. He was scrambling to deal with Hunters and nurses until he heard it was you in trouble.

He had heard you were one of the ones chosen to enter the Protofield so something must’ve happened. Chaos always followed you like a shadow.

He finished up he was doing as fast as he could before propelling himself to the front of the Protofield where he found you in the ground, shaking uncontrollably, a large black coat draped over your body. One of the other Hunters went to debrief Alpha Team while the other tried to tell the nurse that came to help you what happened. Hypothermia was definitely an issue at the moment but you seemed worse off than the other two.

What happened in that Protofield thought Dr. Zayne before quickly checking your vitals. He flinched at how cold your hand, taken aback, but as he traveled up your arm checking for injuries he realized this wasn’t an ordinary cold.

He could feel eyes burning into the back of his head but he ignored it, lifting the coat to check your heart. Your chest was even colder than your hand, signaling this was a problem with your Evol holding too much power. It happened before but not to this extent. But why were you so cold?

The other Hunters didn’t have an Evol that was cold based as far as he knew and he was nowhere near you when you entered the Protofield.

But as he felt you tug on his sleeve his eyes met yours, your face contorted in pain.

“Z..ayne…” you sputtered out. You wanted to tell him, to warn him even, but unconsciousness was taking hold too fast. Frost was leaving your lips with every shallow breath. Highly concerning because it was in the middle of summer. Dr. Zayne yelled for a stretcher to be brought as you needed to be brought to the hospital immediately.

He was caught off guard by the smell of jasmine that wafted into his senses. He knew you didn’t like the smell of jasmine enough to wear it so where was it coming from? The coat, too big to be yours, was one option. Only when he looked back down did the glint of silver catch his eye. He turned the collar to inspect.

Zayne felt the wind get knocked out of him. He recognized the pin. The countless amount of times he dreamed of it had burned it into his head, even in his waking hours.

Panic followed in wake of this revelation. The coat wrinkled under his grip. How did this get here? The fact you were viscerally reacting to a cold Evol and the coat was here meant…

His head whipped around to where he previously ignored the burning stare he felt. His hand shot out faster than he could stop himself and a razor sharp icicle usually saved for Wanderers flew straight to the man opposite from him.

Another icicle shot out just as fast, both colliding in midair, shattering in a shrill snap.

With a shaky breath, Dr. Zayne tried to pull himself back together.

It was like looking in a mirror.

A hauntingly real mirror.

His wall of calm calculation shattered in the face of what, or rather who, was kneeling down next to you. Him. The murderer in his dreams. The screams of countless people rang in his ears, hands shaking in fear and fury.

Dawnbreaker wasn’t fairing much better. He assumed that since he could see into the doctor’s life in dreams, the opposite could happen. But he didn’t know what conclusion Dr. Zayne landed on when he caught glimpses of his life. How many deaths had he seen? Did he see the Abominations? The plague he fought against day in and day out?

The fact Dr. Zayne had taken a swing at him and the look of distain and hatred told him one certain thing. He was not in his good graces.

The stretcher finally arrived and Dr. Zayne had to tear his eyes away to focus on you. If that man started going on a rampage, it would have to be up to the Hunters to kill him somehow. His job was to save you.

Putting his body between you and his doppelgänger, Dr. Zayne quickly strapped you to the stretcher and was off to an ambulance past the trees. Your vitals were erratic and the cold was getting worse, he could feel it emanating off you by now.

Just as you were secured in the gurney a nurse rushed up to the ambulance stating there weren’t enough emergency vehicles to transport everyone and one more person would have to be fit inside. They only had a cut on their arm that required stitches.

Dr. Zayne sighed but nodded, waving the nurse off. Just a few moments later someone was ushered into the ambulance and the doors were closed. Zayne didn’t even have to turn around to know who it was.

Great.

Wordlessly Dawnbreaker just shuffled to the seat towards the front of the cab and sat. His sleeve was cut at the bicep and his arm was tightly bandaged from the nurse who didn’t even bother to look at his face, his coat draped across his other arm.

Not a word was exchanged between the two as the ambulance started moving. Dr. Zayne was now under his oath as a doctor not to try and harm the patient next to him (again) and Dawnbreaker’s mind was grinding to halt as this new reality was sinking in, his mind struggling to keep up.

As the ambulance swayed against the uneven roads on the outskirts of the city, Dawnbreaker found himself getting pulled under, his hearing going muffled and vision blurred in the bright fluorescent light. Dr. Zayne noticed and hesitantly checked his pulse to make sure he was still alive. Dawnbreaker didn’t even flinch at the skin contact.

The ride was silent, and thankfully uneventful, a prelude to the coming chaos about to unfurl in the coming days.

Pt 1 | Pt 2

[still-a-morosexual-help]

Love it when characters casually reveal some insane childhood trauma with a nostalgic smile on their face because this is just a normal part of their childhood how fun! to the absolute horror of those around them who are very much in the 'that's not normal what the actual fuck' boat

Okay but here's what makes me tear up:

This conversation happens in a devilgram where Diavolo is picking apples for Barbatos to make an apple pie for him and it cuts to a flashback that shows Diavolo wanted an apple tree to impress his new angel friend and excitedly tells this to Barbatos. Barbatos then helps Diavolo plant an apple tree in the forest

Isn't that rattling your brain!!!? Aren't you foaming at the mouth!?!?!

The Demon King enchanted this forest to be full of things that could hurt and kill his child, all in the name of preparing Diavolo to be a better king

Then Barbatos helps Diavolo plant apple trees in it, because Diavolo wants to share it with their enemy, a gesture of friendship and good will that would eventually bring peace to the three worlds* which in turn helps Diavolo grow towards becoming a better king

Diavolo's father created a deadly survival course for a child so he wouldn't get bored, something that would keep Diavolo away from him, and the man who actually raised Diavolo spent time with Diavolo helping him grow apple trees in it

A labour of love grown and tended to for years, if not centuries, just so Diavolo could give his friend apples (another gesture of love) built upon the soil of something that was meant to push and punish Diavolo into being the ideal ruler

*(over a series of meetings Diavolo & Lucifer become friends -> Lucifer starts questioning things in the Celestial Realm -> Lucifer, pushed by the sentence against Lilith, starts a war in the Celestial Realm -> Lucifer seeks sanctuary in the Devildom -> Diavolo helps Lucifer + reincarnates Lilith -> Lucifer pledges his loyalty to Diavolo + through Lilith's line MC is eventually born -> through MC & the brothers' fates being tied Lucifer accidentally picks MC for the exchange program -> MC showing that people from all three worlds could not only be close friends but family starts mending bridges + MC wanting to stay in the Devildom permanently gets everyone actively pushing for peace leading to them becoming part of the student council/government and challenging the views of the older/more conservative demons -> all this eventually kickstarts both Diavolo & Lucifer's character & relationship development -> Diavolo learns to be a more considerate ruler & person who listens to others instead of immediately jumping in with his own plans & ideas + Lucifer learns to actually push back against Diavolo & not just be his 'Yes Man')

Also this Devilgram is called "The Seven Apples"

and with lines like,

"Still...I hope that all this effort bears fruit, someday"

"With enough care and attention, I'm certain that it shall."

"Ah, well. Good things come to those who wait, and all that."

And talk about the future of the Devildom and how they pick exactly seven apples, the whole tree talk/metaphor is 100% about gaining the friendship & trust of Lucifer and his brothers by putting in the effort, care and attention to one day, years in the future, have seven shining apples with you

BUT, EVEN WITHOUT THAT DOUBLE MEANING,

It's not just a tree.

It's all about love, isn't it and the things we do for the people we love.