#biting and maiming and scratching and chewing and clawing and ripping

[7pmest]

Anyway I’m getting off my phone for the night. Wish I could put in a garbage disposal but that simply would not be feasible. Sad !

[ploncc]

biting clawing scratching chewing ripping snarling maiming drooling

gnawing snapping mauling wounding beating thrashing whipping ruing  

bashing crashing fighting dueling slamming pelting use misusing

hurting busting flogging screwing howling raging breaking mewling

tunglr vocab. tunglr vocab. tunglr vocab. tunglr vocab.

[terrortomato]

AUTISTICLY INFODUMPING ABOUT CROCODILES AND THE PICK 2 MEME

Absolutely livid at how underestimated crocodiles are in that pick two meme. You absolute fucking dumbshits think 10,000 rats, literally a species that survives mostly by excessive breeding and typically serves the purpose of being food for predators higher in the food chain, are going to suddenly become ravenous bloodthirsty tyrants and skin their prey alive with their shitty little front teeth that usually leave a little scratch, can defeat 10 crocodiles, an undefeated, armored apex predator species of 80 fucking million years. You would probably have more luck sending 100 horses to fight them you absolute fucking fridge temperature IQ brainlets.

Crocodiles are intelligent, tactical and cooperative hunters just as much as the lions and wolves on the list of options. They have extremely high aggression so they're perfect for a combat situation unlike the 10,000 rats or even the grizzly bears that people seem to fall for. Depending on when theyve had their breeding season, you may get the pick of the strongest dominant males, the survivors of the culling of breeding competitors. Around the breeding season of Crocs, male crocs tend to go absolutely fucking beast mode and achieve some really insane hunts. They're far less likely to retreat but they still properly evaluate their prey. They typically only retreat when theyve run out of stamina.

They're generally speedy on land but only for short distances, this is ofc because their hunting style is more stealth and surprise oriented - the speed is used for the final lunge. That being said, if this is some kind of battle royale then inevitably a crocodiles opponent will have to attack, it doesnt need to run at all, it can just wait stealthily like it normally does. Obviously if the battle is taking place near or on a body of water then all other opponents are done for. They can swim at about 20kmh effortlessly and for very long periods of time. The crocodiles preferred technique is maiming their prey and drowning them while ripping them apart all in one swift movement so obviously a body of water adds a massive advantage. Theres no out-swimming a crocodile and theres a very low chance of survival for pretty much every mammal.

On the topic of speed, despite their bulky appearance, they're extremely agile in close combat. Often once their opponent is close, their battle ends quick in the crocodiles favor because they can use the weight of their tails to whip their heads behind them should a predator attack from behind.

Also, saltwater crocodiles grow up to like 2,200 lbs. While this takes a toll on their stamina on land, it massively contributes to their superior ability to wrestle their prey. By catching their prey in their jaws and throwing their weight around, they rip their prey into chunks and crush its bones. They can also throw their weight around when galloping on land to help gain momentum, increasing their speed similarly to how a rabbit runs.

Crocodiles only have 24 teeth. Their only purpose is to grip prey and they do that extremely well, even if the prey is barely in their mouth. Crocodiles dont chew their food, they crush it with their jaws and rip it apart as mentioned above. I should probably also mention that THEY HAVE THE STRONGEST BITE OUT OF ANY LIVING BEING ON THE PLANET! Thats right! Stronger than a hippopotamus. That's approximately 3,700 lbs per square inch of force in just one bite, sometimes even more if it's a big saltie lad.

They have extremely strong bones structures on it's back called osteoderms on top of their dermal armor. THIS CAN MAKE THEM PARTIALLY BULLETPROOF!! Of course, whether its effective against bullets depends on the caliber of gun, the distance its shot from and where the shot lands on the croc. That being said, almost everywhere except its belly is covered in strong dermal armour. To get a clean shot, you need to have a high caliber gun, be relatively close (risky) and you can only one shot it if its exposing its belly or the side of its neck... which is not going to happen if its focused on you and not something above it. The hunter in this situation would definitely want to distract it with bait so they can sneak up close and get the shot.

The main challenges to the crocodile in this situation would be the 50 eagles. The odds are balanced out mostly in numbers here. A potential weak spot for the crocodiles here are the eyes. If the eagles were to go for the eyes, that would obviously be extremely risky given how close it is to the jaw. Not only that but Crocodiles can hold their breath underwater for an hour. Theres a chance that crocodiles could hold their own against eagle attacks for long enough before eventually landing bites on all 50 eagles. Itd be a lengthy, monumental task for only 10 of them though. With the eagles strength in numbers, one could lure the crocodile to jump up from water or land while other eagles could then attack its exposed belly. If this battle takes place on land, they could slash around the crocodiles throats. The numbers here lead more likely to an eagle victory, but a crocodile victory is not impossible.

I've seen some people claim that crocodiles are the weaker option because they're so close to the ground that you can just jump over them. This absolutely hysterical because you're jumping directly into their line of fire! Try to jump over a crocodile headed towards you and you're basically doing all of the work for them. But yeah sure dude! Why not shoot your shot :)

Now I think most people have come to the reasonable conclusion that almost every animal would probably die in this situation and the winner wouldnt be clear at all. Its true that it would mostly just be a loss for everyone. Crocodiles arent exempt from that likelihood. The 10,000 rats are obviously going to have more survivors however they provide absolutely no attack or defense capabilities so they're a useless option if you're picking a team to defend you. Also crocodiles can live up to 100 years old whereas rats live up to about 4 years. Should this battle take place over many years, the crocodiles would probably just live off eating the rats after the other predator species are taken down, making it the clear winner over the rats. Theres absolutely nothing a rat can do to harm a crocodile given how strong the dermal armour of a croc is. All rats can do is run away.

As for the rest, 10 is a very generous number of crocodiles given that you're only offered 1 human, 15 wolves, 7 bulls, 5 gorillas, all significantly weaker animals that the crocodiles could wipe the floor with in the animal kingdom.

The grizzlys normally would be a challenge but because the OP of the pick 2 meme underestimated crocs, we have 10 crocs and 3 bears. A swift bite to the leg of a bear and a heavy throw to the ground for it to be attacked by another crocodile would have the bears finished in minutes. The claws of the bear, blunt or sharp would be a tickle on a crocs armor. Normally blunt bear claw can crush skulls in a single blow. This wouldnt work on a crocodile anywhere near as effectively as crocodiles have an exoskeleton and one of the sturdiest skulls in the animal kingdom. A bear bite is weak as shit compared to crocs and it would be weak against a croc as well for reasons I just stated. A bear wouldnt want to get their head too close to a croc anyway because itd give the croc an opportunity for a single-bite kill around the skull and neck. Granted the bears are faster on land but they're not particularly agile in close combat. Usually this isnt an issue in the bears habitat but in the case of a crocodile, theyll get caught by those quick jaws. These poor bastards have to fight each other anyway in this scenario so the crocodiles would conserves energy by waiting for the bears to get close. In terms of temperament, grizzlies wouldnt go near crocs unless the crocs were actively threatening them. Even then, a heavy tail whip could stun a grizzly and some degree of hesitation or even a retreat. From the perspective of some massive hungry crocs however, 3 grizzly bears might look appetizing and with the unwavering gameness of locked-jaw male crocs, the bears would be fucked.

The 4 lions would be an even bigger challenge because lions are even faster than bears. Both are apex predators of their habitats so normally, it would all come down to who's habitat they're fighting on. That being said, theres been many records of large male nile crocs confronting entire packs of lions on land and coming out on top. And once again, the OP underestimated crocodiles. We have 10 crocodiles and 4 lions. The crocs clearly clap the lions here.

Overall, the strength is determined by how many encounter each other + whether or not the animals are injured or starved + the strength and defense of each animal. That being said its fucking ASTOUNDING to me that barely anyone picks the APEX PREDATOR FOR TENS OF MILLIONS OF YEARS, COMPLETELY UNEVOLVED SINCE, PERFECTED IN THE ART OF HUNTING AND STILL LOW RISK OF EXTINCTION over 10,000 small, defenseless, lower in the food chain animals that dont attack in the way people are hypothetically strategizing and are easy food for every other animal listed.

[khornashflame]

The Joining of the Passionate Pt. I

Vopi listened. That all he could do in this immobile prison that his captors could devise in their less-than-imaginative brain processing with dealing something like him. Something above them in perhaps every way but foolishness. Despite his body frozen into immobility, somehow he could still...feel. He will admit it was a trying experience. His consciousness able to pierce through his mortal coil’s situation. Hearing the voices just outside his stasis sarcophagus. Feeling the vibrations of their free footsteps at their boots thumped on the floor.

How long has he been incarcerated now?

He has lost count embarrassingly enough. His sanity was being tested and his intellect - even though not as brilliantly expressed as some of the war-thinkers and logic-married individuals - had him sparingly fall into brief lapses of tranced sleep. The ascended astartes was patient, even he was surprised sometimes. It helped that he played a mental game to ease the stress. Playing with his bloodthirst always rolling in his veins - remembering every face that he saw on this frigate. Imagining what tortures he will commit to their being till they screamed for release. Oh, how sweet it will be.

If he could move his muscles, the man would smile. Then again, his face already had a subtle grin as if expressing a private joke that will not hatch until a hundred years past the onlookers’ lifetime, unable to figure its jest till it is too late.

The loud whines of vox-alarms were going off now. Excellent, it seems Tzeentch’s games found him to be proper perhaps. It would be uncomely that he dies to an ill accident.

+++ ++ +++ ++

The secondary lighting flared on and off. On and off, red and then darkness. Over and over. It brought a mild irritation to his mind but only for the fact that his heightened mind was drugged into that familiar haze. The need to kill. The need to maim and butcher everything in his way. Bolt, blade, claw and fang. It didn’t matter the process, only the end result.

Bloody death.

His eyes sliced the darkness’ cloak, seeing his enemy as they fired into his direction. Lasgun fire zipping and spearing through. Missing or hitting, the pitiful weapons of the Imperium’s mass-manufacture nothing to the pure majesty of Astartes armour. The projectiles pinged off with the slightest rudeness of a jerk from the Wolf.

His hot breath huffing under his horned helmet, the curved back horns torn from a daemon that dared to challenge him, shaping the vague appearance of a moon’s outer line. His visors burned like hot coals. His bloody chainsword growling and spitting out useless gore from its teeth akin to a mad animal. Hand flexing on the grip of his bolter.

Kill. Kill. Kill. KILL.

The aching need. The grave itch biting on his nape like an alpha dog demanding compliance from its bitch.

It scratched the Wolf of Earth’s Younger Sister to action. His mad howl rolled down the hall before his body charged. Toed boots thumping, throwing his weight forward. The guards on this forsaken ship could do nothing but scream now, the beast was on them in two heartbeats in the distance of several meters.

His chainsword roared as it cut one from left shoulder to right bottom rib, the flak armour nothing but wet tissue to the oppressive might of the First Primarch’s geneseed into this monster of chaos. One clean swipe that bit into a second’s thigh before ripping a chunk of meat from the very bone with the hooked blade’s tip, throwing the screaming man off his boots. One boot nearly snapped a fourth’s leg from the knee down. The loud shots of bolter fire finally unleashed after the last bout, gore splaying the walls with the explosive exits that tore the weak into nothing but steaming meat and destroyed structures.

“FOR THE FIRST! FOR THE WARMASTER!” His warcry rolled. The squad destroyed so quick and utterly, he didn’t even notice they were nothing but limbs for a dog’s chew. More! More! More! He needed more, Khorne needed more!

His chainsword was chewing at the most recent locked door, slicing its masterfully made teeth and blade between the bulkhead with a growing wedge. The process was familiar but all the same tedious. Took minutes before both hands were grabbing and tearing the two halves apart with the strand of muscles fit of a demi-god blessed by the power of the War God himself.

Immediately more lasgun fire was the greeting, the attacking Wolf could do little more than taking it. A grenade rolled in the barrage, bumping against the low cover of a barricade. It took a heartbeat for the defenders to notice. The warning barely passing one of their lips, “Grena-!” Then a beautiful explosion of shrapnel and burning force that killed three of the immediate eleven. The ringing and concussive presence gave him the adapt time to lunge to finish off the frontal squad.

One sweep of chainsword took the head of one and top half of a second. Two ear-bleeding reports of bolterfire into the bodies of three. Something was his back. A flea of a man. He couldn’t even hear the vengeful screams that he made right into his ear. Only the constant throbbing of the hearts pumping cursed adrenaline.

Weapon tossed aside, the Berserker reached back and bodily threw the guard like a toy with such a ferocity, there was a loud pop of spinal cord from the awkward yank. “You will all die!” His voice roared through his vox-grills and murdered the thralls of the Emperor as the ignorant slaves that they were.

The slaughter was fierce and violence personified. If he wasn’t throbbing of anguish and hate, he would almost appreciate it. The martial arts of his legion were as natural as breathing, each movement honed by centuries of spars and war, and yet to the casual viewer, there was nothing short of fatal brutality.

It felt as soon as it started, it was over and the warrior stood at the centre of this room of death. His once pale armour starched of blood’s red, rolling their beads of pain along like beaten rain. Centuries of battles scarred its appearance. The black wolf’s crest resting on his proper pauldron, but even then, its applied calamite gave a near Terminator-like appearance. The bladed elbows and horns, nevermind the hanging trophies of new heads hanging on hooked chains wrapped about his cuirass as well as impaled on spiked rakes on his power generator, were undoubtedly of Khorne’s worship.

His chainsword died a moment, a rest of meditation. Head turning slowly, looking at a couple doors, before snatching the body of the squad sergeant by the nape and marched on his hunt.