#c.johan liebert
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suusoh · 1 year ago
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mwehehehehehhhhhheheheh... ok .... so my submission would be...
“Oh, to be eaten alive by you?” Johan chuckles quite loudly. a genuine, sardonically genuine chuckle. “What a pleasant way to die.”
(This one was surprisingly softer than I expected lol. Hope you enjoy riribells! Thank you for sending the dialogue prompt!!)
(tw: cannibalism mention ofc lol, slight yandere? catholic joke at the end, other than that, nothing else surprisingly)
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Of course.
Of course, those are the exact things that he would say tonight. Though you really should have known better, than to watch some show with him where cannibalism is the central point of the plot. This one's on you honestly.
"Can—" you take a deep breathe before you continue, "can we please just have one, one, peaceful movie night?"
Johan's sitting beside you on your sofa as both of you stay in for your weekly night in, he's seated one space away from you, a small pillow acting as a barrier between you two. He always maintains that polite way of sitting when he comes over, like how one would sit when being a first time guest in a different home.
The only thing being that this is not in fact, his first time spending time with you here at your place. Numerous hang outs already happening within your humble abode, so maybe it's just your friend's general knack for good posture and deportment.
"Is there something wrong with what I've told you?"
He replies with a slight tilt to his head. You can't tell if it's from feigned or genuine confusion.
Your mouth just silently hangs open in a little 'o' shape. Thinking for a few seconds how you should even respond to that.
"Oh I don't know; the part where we're talking about cannibalism, the part where it's me specifically eating you, or the part where you find it a 'pleasant way to die' as you put it so nicely"
A small smile tugs on his lips.
He always smiles at you when seeing you react. Not in a way that's condescending (sometimes), but out of almost... genuine enjoyment. It didn't matter which approach you took.
Sarcastic or honest, nervous or nonchalant, bantering or silence. it was all the same to him: a front row view to you.
"I'm simply in topic. Are you telling me it's not normal, for people to discuss their thoughts and what they would do in the character's situation, while watching a show or movie?"
He's got you there you gotta admit. But still.
"Are we not even going to dissect your confession?"
"By all means." He nods.
His slight intrigue and the subtle excitement in his posture doesn't go unnoticed by you. You'll brush it off for now, another instance added to your growing personal collection of brushing off Johan's behaviour whenever he's acting kinda odd.
"...Actually, nevermind. I don't know where to begin with this. I'm just gonna not... talk... or think about it anymore."
You huff and lean back on the sofa again. His comment is out of pocket, sure, but you'll just let it go for now. Not really something worth making a big deal over. It's just another case of Johan being, well, Johan. And as he said, it's just harmless talk about what they're watching right now.
He watches you slump. He wants keep up this conversation, but he'll let you have your peace for now.
"Oh, alright then. Should I resume the show? We were— "
"— oh waaaaait wait wait wait a moment... did you say alive?"
You shoot up again. Eyes wide and brows furrowing. You know you look so cartoonishly shocked at him. You don't care. You are shocked. Why hide it?
"Hm, alive, yes. That's what I told you. Do you find this an issue?"
"You are alive in this theoretical cannibalism scenario with me. You are watching it unfold. You are breathing, you are conscious, you are awake, you are whatever else word similar with all those!"
Johan doesn't even move from his position. Still sitting and looking at you all politely. He is amused though.
"Should I not watch it all unfold? I'm sure it would be a pleasant sight..." his eyes look down and to the side as he revisits on some past thoughts. You see what almost looks like affection reflecting inside of it and you don't know how to feel about that. His eyes then return to you, holding his soft gaze with yours.
"I wouldn't mind. I'll even guide you through it."
"you'll... guide... me... through-"
you give up. You're done.
Exasperated groan leaving you as slump and deflate into the sofa . Mind too tired to fully talk about this right now. You grab the pillows near you and stack it around your head to aid in muffling out whatever word Johan says next.
You swear at this point, anything he says just gets progressively worse and worse. Baffling you more than cluing you in.
You enjoy the peace and darkness of your little soundproof world. There's bit of shifting on the sofa, then one by one, the pillows slowly move their way out of your face. He removes the last one, revealing you to the sight of Johan looking over you curiously.
"You know..." he puts the last pillow gently under the base of your head, "... all I'm saying is, just like the characters in the show, if there were truly no presence of food at all, absolutely nothing, and you were starving to the point of dying..."
He lightly pats your head.
"I think it would be a waste to not use my flesh for sustenance. There's nothing bad about it in the situation. Did you know that the people in the Andes mountain plane crash made a pact to their friends, that in the event one of them dies, they want their body to be consumed, in order for the others to keep on living?"
He smiles softly at that and something fills your chest with a slight warmth upon hearing his intentions. His explanation on the matter does make it seem a bit more pragmatic in a survival situation, not to mention it oddly has a sense of camaraderie to it.
"Well that's... very thoughtful of you then." You quirk a brow at him. Playful laugh almost bubbling out of your lips.
"Mhm. The reason I say 'alive'... well, I doubt you'd be able to do it without me instructing you. You'd be a blubbering crying mess while making all the wrong cuts, and I'd have bled out for nothing." He flicks your forehead.
"Hey!"
"Am I wrong?" he follows up by soothingly rubbing the spot where he flicked you.
"If just the mere thought of eating someone who willingly gives up their flesh for you to consume gets you this worried already... I wonder how you'll even be able to fare when you have to do the real thing."
You roll your eyes at him and swat his hand away.
"You're expecting me to act like that's the easiest thing on earth: eating the blood and body of a person you hold dear to you. I can't be normal about that, Johan!"
Johan can feel his finger twitch slightly. He stills himself impassive. How you effortlessly called him a person "dear" to you. Said with so little thought, and yet so undeniably genuine.
He thinks the notion odd, and nearly baseless. He's even sure at one point in his life he'd think you naive for that. But then again, he doesn't blame you. He does present himself as a friend to you... in fact, it's all he's ever been doing with you so far. Surprisingly. Also he did quite literally confess to letting you consume his flesh for your own benefit.
Not that he won't be getting his own benefits in that scenario.
With each bite you'll take, he gets to see parts of himself sustaining you, filling you, going inside of you and eventually being absorbed.
You'll swallow him, and he'd be so deeply ingrained by you at that point that you can't deny that he would be the blood running in your veins, he would be the branches in your lungs making you breathe, the ghost of him living within you, squeezing and squeezing your heart each second to pump it, as he lets you live another day.
He is inside of you;
mentally and physically.
Of course, the sight of you in tears and covered in his blood is just another adorably lovely cherry on top, but he won't tell you that. Saving all those intimate details for himself, preferably when he's alone.
...eating the blood and body of a person you hold dear. I can't be normal about that, Johan!
He chuckles softly. Patting your head again.
"Well, you obviously haven't seen Catholics. If they can do it, so can you."
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hosuus · 8 months ago
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I want to bite Johans cheek;(
real. not just bite. CHOMP. i want to have like...only half of his face remaining when I'm done with him.
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All while he gently wipes you clean with his handkerchief after every bite <3 he's happy you're having such a filling meal (him). Would you like seconds darling? Perhaps a nice 1988 Marsala wine to pair? Tell him <3
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suusoh · 11 months ago
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Johan manipulating someone but they have brain rot, so he has to hold up a video on his phone of subway surfers playing so that they can actually pay attention to what he's saying.
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suusoh · 11 months ago
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been thinking for the past hour how I'd write johan talking during sex. and I don't think he'd do dirty talk, he'd just be softly blunt, polite, and direct the whole time. not even in a commanding way, just in a neutral and blank way. it could be awkward? it's so lacking in spice... but maybe that's hotter?
"lift your hips a bit."
"give me a kiss."
"breathe. let it out. don't hold it. let me hear you."
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suusoh · 11 months ago
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I'm so sorry but could you imagine your friend Johan being all touchy and fond with you again, cupping your face and kissing both of your cheeks, and nuzzling you all over. When you try to point it out and question him about it, he doesn't even hesitate for second before saying the lamest most half-baked excuse on earth without blinking.
"I'm European."
then happily goes back to squishing and biting you.
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suusoh · 1 year ago
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i think...... i think johan has a marriage kink......
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suusoh · 10 months ago
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check this post out for context :)!! but anyways— weird cryptid johan, who can't be killed for some reason, but enjoys seeing you endearingly try anyways.
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You try to bury him alive.
Maybe the trick isn't to kill him, but to keep him contained. Not give him any chance to come back from the dead, or regenerate his injuries. Locked away. In a dark, tight, crummy box like he deserves.
You wipe the sweat off your brow and neck, grease and grime mixing in with your body fluids and staining your shirt. At least the dirt mound is smaller now, an estimate of maybe... maybe 15 more shovels at least, and the bastard would finally leave you alone for a good while.
Maybe you should leave flowers, a nice little sentiment of peace.
Or maybe you should let a dog do it's business all over, you don't really care about what to do afterwards. You're just glad you got the cement part over.
Having to combine all that cement mix, carry heavy buckets to pour all over his casket, and waiting for it to dry was back-breaking. But it was a necessary precaution no less; anything to ensure you never see those god-awful eyes stare at you again.
Hah, rest in peace you son of a bitch.
...or daughter, or something.
Come to think of it: was he— it— even a guy? or even had an existing gender at all? Gender is rather... more of a human thing after all, creating a definition to categorise ourselves. To categorise other humans.
And that thing, obviously, is nowhere near to what can even be considered human. Seeming to switch out of skins as if it were merely switching out shirts for the day. Even morphing itself and contorting its face and body into the image of a dead relative of yours one time.
(It got it wrong. It copied the image from a family picture, but family pictures never contain faces of disappointment, do they? That's where it made a mistake, by copying that camera-ready smile and looking at you warmly.
and that's how you knew something was wrong.)
As confusing as it is by itself, another thing bothers you. See, it could easily copy anyone, at any given moment. Anyone. From a distant childhood friend to the everyday mailman.
Yet it leaves you stunned at times that it chooses a somewhat... "consistent" body, if you can call it that, when it comes it visit you. You'd expect it to come to you wearing your classmates face, or donning the look of an innocent child, or if it really wants, it could do something closer to home again.
But... no. It actually, presents itself with this certain appearance for some reason.
It didn't resemble anyone from your past or of significance to you, so using this look leaves your tormentation out of the list (surprisingly); it doesn't look like your ideal type either, so definitely not seduction. You have no idea who this is.
Perhaps a collage of features the entity chose to mix and match, or is it an entirely copied form of an already existing person? If so, then why him? Who is he?
A young man.
Blonde, tall, and pale; a crisp matching blazer and pants ensemble that never seemed to wrinkle.
Blue eyes.
Blue wretched eyes, you're absolutely sure you've already drove a pen into, or cut out with a knife, numerous times into a bloody squishy mess that leaves you crying after. But no matter what, those eyeballs always seems to come back as good as new the next time you see them again. Untouched in its place and doll-like, a bit too squeaky clean and a bit too perfect.
It makes your skin crawl.
Breathe... you're almost done.
You take a small break, lowering your self to sit on the muddy dirt ground, groaning when your backaches serve as a reminder of being hunched over all day; you toss the shovel aside and take in much needed breaths.
Something ice-cold and wet touches the back of your neck.
You jolt forward. shocked. disgusted. Quickly using your hand to cover your nape. Eyes shooting open and twisting around to whatever the hell just did that.
A singular bottle of water is held in front of you. You freeze.
"Tired?"
He asks, gentle expression resting on his face, still holding out the cold bottle with his hand to you.
A hand without even a single trace of blood, dirt, or cement on it, not even a single speck hiding under the fingernails.
No.
No No No No.
He's here.
He's not 8 feet underground stuffed in a dark wooden box, with a sheet of cement weighing on top of it to prevent him from crawling out, and layers and layers of dirt ensuring to push him down with added pressure.
He. Is. Here.
And he is smiling at you, whilst handing you a drink. In his neatly pressed clothes that look picked straight from the dry cleaners. And now everything you did, for the past 39 hours of sheer labor and desperation, is reduced to absolutely— nothing.
"I apologise for not telling you sooner to save you the trouble."
You don't need his comfort; the emotions he invokes in you will never come close to resembling comfort.
"But at the very least, it's not all for naught: you've found another method that doesn't quite do the job yet."
He’s still holding out the water for you, but it’s the way he extends his hand that makes you stare at the synthetically still limb in front of you, nothing about it human or natural—more akin to a statue covered by a thin layer of skin.
After lingering in a still state of suspended animation— his hand moves. The action so sudden, you flinch a bit. This elicits... something from him. You're not sure what reaction he's supposed to be portraying right now, was he supposed to be... chuckling? Or gasping in some weird way? The sound never making it past his throat as he just continues staring and making that noise. You don't like it.
He brings the bottle closer to your lips, wordlessly encouraging you to drink. A twitch in his fingers suggests he’s trying to recalibrate the functions of his human body, retrying to hold the bottle correctly; more naturally. More... gentle. Fluid.
He smiles again; it doesn’t make you feel good. The tug of his lips is a mimicry; you're sure he's borrowing someone else’s mouth right now, still trying to appear as "comforting".
"We'll just have to try again, won't we? I’m sure you’ll find plenty of ways to keep disappointing yourself."
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suusoh · 10 months ago
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post-rurenheim johan as a tired yandere is soooo dear to me.
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"...I've come to pick you up. Though, a glass of water would be nice before we leave."
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suusoh · 11 months ago
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Headcanon that once Johan gets over his breakdown over physical contact the dam bursts and he holds on to darling like a traumatized abandoned child would hold onto their old raggedy doll. Wide eyed empty stare squeezing the poor thing like a boa constrictor. You’ll need to fight your way out of his arms tbh
PERIOD!! THAT'S WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT ANON!!!!
He's holding back at first because of his own subconscious image of himself and he knows how weird this is and how it'll freak you out. But once he's over both of those factors, it's literally all over for you. Not even a crowbar would be able to pry him off you at that point. The only temporary reprieve you might have is the bathroom, but even that's debatable, I wouldn't be surprised if he still wants to follow you all the way there. He'd be so nonchalant about it too like:
"Johan. Please let go of me. i literally need to pee and i don't want to have you clinging on to me and watching that."
"oh... It's okay, I don't mind."
"I DO."
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suusoh · 1 year ago
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Still laughing at the idea of Johan feeling horny for the first time and he treats it like he's going through some actual body horror. He gets a bit hot under the collar one time, and he automatically starts thinking he's in a david cronenberg-esque movie.
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suusoh · 1 year ago
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Something about Johan assigning you as his emotional support dog human.
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suusoh · 11 months ago
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Johan seems like he'd have the time of his fucking life testing his loved one's boundaries, but what would be *his* own personal boundaries?
He is nonnie. exactly. He is living the best life like there is no loss for him.
I'm on the assumption that we're still on the sexual boundaries here as those are what my recent posts were referring too. Hcs below the cut! nsfw of course.
Pre-rurenheim:
I actually think pre-rurenheim johan has less boundaries.
He's not in touch with his attraction yet and still has that "monster" subconscious in him, he doesn't get hard. So even if you try to get back at him, he'll just find it amusing.
you brush against his stuff, and he just quirks an eyebrow up at you. pats your head for the good try.
He'll even allow you to get all touchy with him though. Like have fun trying to get a rise out of him. (Think that scene when he was in the red light district and that one prostitute held onto his arm and he just continued asking for directions unbothered lol.) He wants to see your attempts even if it's futile.
Another thing that comes to my mind is that you will not be seeing his dick in a long time. That will be kept zipped up in his pants. He gets to play with you but you will not be playing with him in a sense.
It's a power play sure, but also I think johan really.... doesn't care about his pleasure. He doesn't feel pleasure. He feels nothing. Seeing you squirm and shake (either from fear or pleasure) is enough gratification for him.
But also vulnerability. That's literally his private part. He's not gonna let himself be emotionally vulnerable and literally phsyically vulnerable... he knows that if you REALLY don't like him (unwilling reader scenario) you'll have no qualms with using his, ehem, his anatomical parts against him. He may be emotionally numb but he knows damn well his numbness won't save the pain of whatever you choose to do to him down there out of your spite.
Post-rurenheim:
Has more boundaries because he's human and has a sense of personal identity yay!
PLEASE do not be all touchy and brush against him he will bust a nut since he really really likes you 💀
Like he is fighting for his life because he never learned how to deal with a boner before. Not even during his puberty.
you STILL won't be seeing his dick in a long time. He literally just doesn't care about his pleasure, only focusing on yours. It's almost funny how it ironically comes off as altruism.
But it's because he still hasn't gotten that sense of "his" pleasure yet. He still hasn't allowed himself to accept the fact that he's more human now and that comes with all the little quirks of it too.
Also because I think he doesn't quite enjoy of it if it's solely his pleasure? his pleasure is directly and irreversibly linked with yours. your pleasure is already his. If he gets his dick touched that's just a cherry on top. Seeing you in pleasure is honestly already the main event for him.
hi can you tell I'm making him a pure service top okay bye.
Not that he won't appreciate the gesture of course. He'll appreciate you greatly for it. Loves that you care about him too.
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suusoh · 10 months ago
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still a big fan of johan hating bathrooms because of how it's one of the only times you can escape him a bit. how can you even cut him off from your life like this? if he really can't come in with you can't you at least leave the door ajar so he can hold hands with you while you pee?
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suusoh · 11 months ago
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I really do feel like there's no dating stage with johan if you know what I mean. there's no situationship, dating, or boyfriend stage. he thinks all of that is just a stalling phase to what he knows already he wants in the end. it'll just jump immediately to spending the rest of your life with him. like there is no point of experimentation if he knows he wants to be involved with you. you guys are friends and one day you agree to try to date him, and the next thing you know, your first date with johan is him bringing you along to city hall to sign papers at the registry office.
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suusoh · 11 months ago
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divine comedy is finding out Johan's weird tendencies this whole time is because he feels attraction towards you, so you decide to help him out in an effort to "get it out of his system" (and hopefully make him calm down, realise how to handle his newfound human urges on his own, and hopefully make him stop being weird over you) but it only makes him 10x more attached and obsessed and just makes the entire situation worse because now he's never leaving you alone after that experience💀
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suusoh · 11 months ago
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nooooooo way in hell was this guy taking over the underground banks while his voice was cracking.
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