#caesar diaz

[t0yac1d]

My Juliet, my special girl (C. Diaz x Fem!Reader)

I hope that she looks at me and thinks, "Shit, he is so pretty"

Warnings: gang violence, death, after Olivia's Quince, blood, contemplating suicide

Word Count: 889

It was the morning after Olivia's Quince. The morning after a beautiful party. The morning after Latrelle shot Ruby and killed Olivia.

"It's all my fault."

"I shouldn't have shown mercy to Latrelle."

"I shouldn't have gone after him in the first place."

Cesar blamed and hated himself deeply.

He hated what happened to Ruby and Olivia because in his eyes, that should’ve been him.

In his eyes, that should’ve been him who got shot.

In his eyes, that should’ve been him who got killed. 

I need to cry, but I can't get anything out of my eyes,

Cesar sat on the edge of his bed, eyes filled with frustrated tears that threatened to spill but they wouldn’t fall. No matter how upset he was, they wouldn’t pour.

Or my head. 

And oh my god, the night. That night kept repeating in his brain. 

The sound of the gunshot.

The sound of Ruby screaming his name before getting shot. 

The sounds of Geny and Ruben screaming as their son lay on the ground, bleeding out. 

Every little detail played continuously in his brain. It was like a record player stuck in a loop.

Did I die? I need to run,

Days went by without Cesar coming out of the house. He felt like an empty body, just moving on its own throughout the day.  

but I can't get out of bed for anyone.

He was scared. 

Not of Latrelle or any gang member after him. 

But of his friends and Ruby’s family. 

What if they all hated him? He wouldn’t blame them, but this was the last thing he expected that would break the group up. 

He couldn’t get out of bed to see anyone.

 Not for you,

Not even for the girl he wanted to live for. 

When he did get the courage to go outside, he went to school first. He wanted to see if everyone still wanted to be his friend. Because if not, then he’d just apologize and go away. Leave their lives for good and keep them out of harm’s way. 

When Cesar got to school, no one greeted him. It was like he didn’t exist. 

He hated how no one talked to him, but he couldn’t blame them. He took their friend away.

Cesar skipped a couple classes that day. He just sat in an empty and dark classroom, silently sobbing and crying. 

My sour boy is a pain, 

His chest hurt with each sob he let out, 

I wanna shoot him in the brain,

He doesn’t deserve to live. It should’ve been him instead of Olivia.

He feels like if he died, everything would be better for his friends. 

 but I'd miss him in the morning. 

But a part of him says that this isn’t the way to think. That what happened has already happened and there’s not much to do about it but move on and make amends.

It really hurts when I need to so bad, but I can't see her..

He missed you, 

My Juliet, 

He missed you so dearly.

My special girl.

The only girl that can really, truly help him through a time like this.

But I need to understand when I can power through,

Because he knows you’ll get him through this, and help guide him to the right choice here. 

Cesar pulled his phone out with shaky hands and sent a text to you, he was sure there were a few words that were misspelled, but you’ll understand what he meant. Hopefully. 

He sat in that classroom, patiently waiting for you to come to him. But this time alone helped him think to himself, about himself. 

Sometimes I act like I know, but I'm really just a kid.

He’s just a kid. He doesn’t know what he’s doing. All he’s really doing is causing problems.

With two corks in his eyes, and a bully in his head.

And hurting those around him because of his actions.

I wanna make a colour that no one else has seen before 

He wants to get out and do something with his life. He doesn’t want to be stuck in the gang for the rest of his life. 

I wanna be so much more

He wants to show everyone that he can make something of himself. That he’s not “Little Spooky”. That he’s Cesar Diaz. 

You walked into the classroom and saw Cesar sitting on the floor. You walked over to him and sat with him. You didn’t say anything to him, you just sat there and looked at him with a slight frown. 

You didn’t like this. He looked so exhausted. 

He had dark eye bags under his eyes, and even then they were red and puffy from the crying. He had tear marks on his face and his clothes were disheveled. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, resting his head on your shoulder, as you rubbed his back and lightly scratched his head while you held him.

“It’s ok Cesar.” 

He leaned back and looked at you with teary eyes, wondering what was running in your head as you saw him like this. 

I hope that she looks at me and thinks, "Shit, he is so pretty”

The one thing that was running through his mind at this moment was how you thought of him.

Something I can't believe..

[jhdanes]

When you are that friend XD . Prompt from @write-it-motherfuckers on tumblr. Belle being the chaotic child she is and Paris trying to not die along the way.

[literaryelise]

"Oh, Gracia!" she said. "As if it were him I missed in the first place.”

The Stars Undying, Emery Robin

[innovative-robust-theme]

In addition to the design elements, it's important to consider the functionality of the template as well.

[amorediaz-writes]

│ FORMAT･ﾟ⎯ 𝖲𝖾𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗌

│ SUMMARY･ﾟ⎯ 𝖠𝗓𝖺𝗋𝗂𝖺 𝗋𝖾𝗍𝗎𝗋𝗇𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗍𝗈𝗐𝗇, 𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗒 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌, 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝖽𝗂𝖽𝗇’𝗍 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝗌𝗁𝖾’𝖽 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝗉𝖾𝖺𝗄 𝗍𝗈 answer Cesar’s invite.

│ WORD COUNT･ﾟ⎯ 𝟤,𝟫𝟢𝟣

│ WARNINGS･ﾟ⎯ 𝖺𝖽𝗎𝗅𝗍 𝗅𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗎𝖺𝗀𝖾.

│ NOTES･ﾟ ⎯ 𝖧𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗀𝗎𝗒𝗌 𝖾𝗇𝗃𝗈𝗒.

⟼ O𝗌𝖼𝖺𝗋 𝖣𝗂𝖺𝗓 Masterlist || Series Masterlist

⟼ 𝖭𝖾𝗑𝗍 𝖢𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗍𝖾𝗋

𝖢𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝖨❤️‍🔥: 𝖶𝖾𝗅𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝖡𝖺𝖼𝗄 𝖳𝗈 𝖥𝗋𝖾𝖾𝗋𝗂𝖽𝗀𝖾

   AZARIA SMILED AS she drove through the county of Los Angeles to her new house. After saving all her money, she finally bought herself a cozy three-bedroom place. Also, Azaria didn't know what to expect when her friends saw her again. One thing she did know was that she couldn't be any happier to be home. As Azaria drove past the bridge of shrines dedicated to those that lost their lives, she knew she had made it to Freeridge.

  Driving down the street, Azaria couldn't help but reminisce on her memories before she left. All the block parties she attended, the fights she had on the road to enjoying the sun while walking on the sidewalk. There was one person she would always kick it with, and that was Oscar Diaz. The two were inseparable. After meeting in high school, you would never no see them together.

  Oscar and Azaria spent all day together the day before she left Freeridge and made love all night. She took a piece of Oscar's heart with her when she left. Azaria missed him every day and vice versa. One thing Azaria hoped to happen now that she was back was to rekindle the flame between her and Oscar. That's what she planned.

  In no time, Azaria pulled up to her new house and parked in front. As she stepped out, the sun beamed down on her while staring at her greatest accomplishment. Noticing the moving truck pulling up, Azaria locked her car and greeted the movers. After exchanging greetings, Azaria unlocked the front door, and the helpers moved the furniture inside the once-empty home.

  Rolling her suitcase inside her new home, Azaria thanked the helpers and locked the door behind them. She stood in the living room, not knowing what to do first. Azaria wanted to call her best friend Imani. When she grabbed her phone, the doorbell rang. A confused look appeared on Azaria's face as she went to answer it.

  She saw the top of the person's head through the peephole. As she opened the door, she peeked around the door seeing none other than Jamal, Ruby, Caesar, and Monse. Jamal and  Ruby seemed to be bickering back and forth. Azaria opened the door all the way and stood there watching them.

"I know it's Zari, and you can't tell me otherwise," Jamal remarked, stomping his feet like a child.

"What if it's not her? We knocked on a random person's door, Jamal!" Ruby affirmed, shaking his head.

"Are you guys done arguing yet?" The woman questioned, leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed.

  The teens looked up, gasping as they met Azaria's eyes. "See, I fucking told you it was her." Jamal was excited to see Azaria again as he jumped up and down, clapping his hands. All she could do was shake her head.

  Jamal's energy made Azaria miss him the most. That kid always brightened her day whenever they came across each other.

"What can I do for you guys?" Azaria asked, crossing her arms over her chest and cocking her hip.

"First and foremost, welcome back to Freeridge Zari," Ruby said, shoving Jamal to the side. "I see time away has made you more beautiful."

"Thank you, Ruby." The woman praised as a smirk came across her face.

"Second, I missed you," Jamal commented, walking up to Azaria to hug her. "Why did you leave me."

  Ruby scoffed and shoved Jamal again, pushing him away from Azaria. As he went to wrap his arms around her, he sneakily ran his hands down to her ass, resting them there. Azaria couldn't help but smile at the young boy's antics, but she had to tell for the hundredth time.

"Ruby, sweetheart. I love you like you're my little brother, but if you don't move your hands, I'll break them in so many different places that you won't be able to masturbate again." Azaria warned, staring at Ruby, who slowly retracted his arms. "Thank you. So what are you kids up to?"

"We were going to the pool to go swimming when we saw you were moving in. Do you want to come?" Monse questioned, stepping in front of the two boys who started bickering back and forth.

"Sure, I'll see you guys there in an hour," Azaria replied, nodding her head.

"Good, we'll see you there." The young girl beamed, clapping her hands.

  Azaria waved at the teens before closing the front door. She goes over to her purse, grabs her phone, and calls her closest best friend, Imani. These two had an unbreakable friendship and would ride for each other ten toes down. After a few rings, Imani answers the call.

My Other Half🌞🤍 - Didn't we get off the phone?

No, we didn't, but if you want me to find another best friend, I can do that.

My Other Half🌞🤍 - Don't get disrespectful. What's up?

Do you and Honey Buns want to meet me at the community pool?

My Other Half🌞🤍 - Yea, we'll meet you there.

Okay, see you, babe.

My Other Half🌞🤍 - Goodbye, my love.

Azaria plugged her phone and headed to the bathroom for a quick rinse. After she stepped out of the glass enclosure, she wrapped a towel around herself. Searching through her clothes, she didn’t know what to wear. Finally, Azaria decided on an orange and yellow tie-dye three-piece bikini with shorts. She grabbed her phone and car keys before heading out as her feet slid in some slides.

   As she drove down the road, Azaria couldn’t wait to see her best friends, especially Samara, aka Honey Buns. Since she’s been away, Samara called Azaria every day. They'd talk on the phone from sun up to sun down. Azaria was thankful for Samara calling her and checking on her. She appreciated her friendship so much.

   Arriving at the public pool, Azaria noticed Imani’s car and parked beside her. The friends stepped out of the vehicle simultaneously and screamed upon seeing each other.

“Bitch! Look at you!” Samara beamed, spreading her arms wide.

   Azaria smiled and ran into her best friend's arms, smiling at her. “Oh, I miss you so much, Honey Buns.”

“Girl, I missed you too,” Samara replied, not wanting to let go of Azaria. She wanted her friend to stay in her arms forever.

“Um, excuse me. What about me?” Imani dramatically coughed, standing with her arms open.

“You know I missed you, boo.” Azaria smiled, wrapping her arms around her other friend.

“I see you’ve gotten thicker.” Imani teased, smacking Azaria on the ass.

“Hell yeah, you did. I love it.” Samara said, nodding her head in approval.

“Well, I’ve been hitting the gym while I was away.” Azaria smiled, twirling around in a circle.

“Mhm. Either that or getting some dick.” Imani remarked, smirking at her friend.

   The pair stared at their friend, waiting for her to reveal the truth they wanted to hear. Azaria rolled her eyes, making the girls laugh.

“Okay, a little bit of that too. I’m not going to lie.” She laughed, shrugging her shoulders.

“I know that’s right.” Imani cheered, giving Azaria a high five.

“Well, come on. I want to get in some water. It’s hot as the devil's dick out here.” Samara replied, fanning herself with her hand.

   The three friends placed their sunglasses on their faces and started walking through the gates, looking like some bad bitches.

   Oscar leaned against the side of the pool, lost in his thoughts. Lately, he couldn’t keep his mind off his true love, Azaria Summers. He missed the hell out of her and wished he could see her beautiful melanin face again. Little did Oscar know his wish was going to come true. As he glanced towards the entrance gate, he suddenly felt like he had a deja vu.

   He couldn’t believe the view before him; he knew he didn’t have 20/20 vision but swore his imagination was playing tricks on him. Since Azaria arrived with her friends, Oscar couldn’t tear his gaze away from her beautiful body. Something was different about Azaria. She appeared thicker than the last time he saw her five years ago.

   The thought of Azaria occupied Oscar’s mind, thinking of all the times they’d shared that he didn’t hear his current armpiece calling for him until he felt a smack on the back of his bald head.

“¡Pinche perra! No pongas tus putas manos sobre mí.” Oscar cursed, turning to face his arm candy, Danica. ( “Fucking bitch! Don’t put your fucking hands on me.” )

   Oscar met her last year at the strip club, where he had to handle some business, and she approached him. He thought Danica was looking good, and he needed a release. At first, it was supposed to be a one-night stand, but he couldn’t cut her loose for some reason. Danica would only be a hit and quit, but Oscar always felt lonely, but she could never fill that hole in his heart that belonged to Azaria.

“I’m sorry, bebé, but I’ve been calling you, and it’s like you’re stuck on something.” Danica apologized, rubbing the side of his stubble.

   More like someone, and that someone is a person he held close to his heart, unlike the chica he’s with now.

“What is it?” Oscar asked, blocking his face from the bright sun.

“I asked if you wanted to do something special tonight.” She replied, fixing her sunglasses on her face.

“Special like what?” Oscar questioned, arching an eyebrow in confusion.

“I don’t know, maybe you, me, a bottle of Don Julio, and a bathtub,” Danica smirked, biting her glossed bottom lip.

   If Oscar was honest, he didn’t want to spend any more time with Danica now that he knew the love of his life was back in town. The look on her face held a hopeful expression.

“Nah, I have the gang coming over,” Oscar remarked, shaking his head.

“But they always come over, and I never have you to myself,” Danica whined, making Oscar cringe. 

   The sound of her voice was like nails scraping on a chalkboard, and it honestly irritated him. “You know what you signed up for when you got with me.”

   He watched her from the corner of his eye as she rolled her eyes and huffed like a child throwing a temper tantrum. Oscar knew that now his chica was back in town, he had to do whatever it took to get her back. With his back against the pool wall, Oscar gazed up at the sun after fixing his sunglasses and smiled. Now that his one true love was back in town, he couldn’t wait till he felt her soft skin. Things would finally go back to the way they were before she left.

   Oscar sat in the cool water and watched Azaria from across the pool like a creep. He felt like a weirdo for doing so, but he didn’t care. Danica started getting on his nerves, complaining about the sun being too hot, making him roll his eyes.

   You should’ve stayed fucking home.

   With a huff, Oscar turned to say something to his arm candy but stopped when he saw his little brother Cesar walking toward him. Oscar was glad his hermano came in time. At that time, Danica got up and walked to the bathroom, letting Oscar sigh in relief.

“Wassup, little bro?” Oscar questioned, looking at Cesar.

“I see you are staring at Zaria,” Cesar smirked, pushing his shoulder against his brother’s.

“When did she get back?” He asked, smiling at his younger sibling.

“Today. The crew and I were walking to the house and saw a moving truck. Come to find out, it was Azaria moving into Freeridge.” Cesar explained, dipping his feet into the water.

“How far does she live?” Oscar asked, nibbling the inside of his cheek.

“About a block away,” Cesar answered, swinging his feet.

“Invite her over.” The eldest brother said as a smirk appeared on his face.

“Why?” The youngest sibling asked, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

“Do it,” Oscar replied, climbing out of the pool.

   When he gathered his things, Danica followed like a lost puppy behind him as they exited the gate to the parking lot. Cesar grinned and approached where Monse, Jamal, and Ruby sat near Azaria and her friends.

“Hey, are you guys doing anything tonight?” Cesar asked the three women, who raised their brows at him.

“What’s it to you?” Imani questioned, pulling down her sunglasses.

“You guys should come over. Today’s one of the homie’s birthday.” Cesar smoothly claimed, trying to be persuasive.

“What? You want us to come over?” Azaria smiled, laughing at Cesar’s antics.

“I don’t see why not, seeing as Imani and Samara are always there.” Cesar shrugged as a grin appeared on his face.

“I guess we can come over,” Samara replied, rolling her eyes.

“See you guys later.” Cesar waved at the girls as he and his group exited the pool area.

“What the fuck just happened?” Samara asked, utterly confused.

“I think we got asked out by a fourteen-year-old,” Imani replied, shaking her head as she laughed.

“Well, it looks like we have plans tonight.” Azaria laughed, checking her phone notifications.

“Bitch I know you fuckin’ lyin’.” Samara cursed, rolling her eyes.

“I wish I was.” Imani sighed, shaking her head.

   Azaria laughed at her friends as Samara had a look of disbelief written on her face.

   Walking to her car, Azaria smiled as she hugged Samara and Imani. “We can meet up at my house.”

“Hell, we’ll follow you there,” Samara replied, waving her hand.

“That’s fine with me.” Azaria shrugged, tossing her bag in the passenger seat.

   She climbed into her car and shut the door as she stuck her keys in the ignition. Arriving at home, Azaria unlocked the front door and entered the dwelling.

“Ooo, girl, I love your new place.” Samara beamed excitedly, looking around the living room.

“Yea. It feels empty, but yet it's not.” Imani replied, nodding in agreement.

   Azaria turned to her friends, arching an eyebrow at them with an amused expression, and said, “Ya’ll can get the hell out with all that negativity.” She pointed to the front door as she leaned against the plush couch.

“Miss me with that bullshit. We are just playing with you.” Imani replied, smacking her lips and waving her best friend off.

“Anyway, the guest rooms are that way. I’m going to take a shower.” Azaria explained, pointing to the opposite end of the hallway.

“See you in a minute.” Samra nodded, walking into the guest bathroom to run a shower.

   Azaria entered her bathroom, turned on the shower, entered her closet, and searched the hanger for an outfit. She knew it would be warm outside, even with the sundown, since it was the middle of summer, so she knew her clothing had to have fewer sleeves. Once the water reached the perfect temperature, Azaria removed her swimsuit and stepped inside the glass enclosure. The water felt good running down Azaria’s body as she washed the chlorine and pool water off herself. After washing off, Azaria shut off the water, wrapped a towel around herself, and walked to her room.

   When Azaria dried off, she moisturized her skin and dressed in Shein's sexy ripped raw hem denim shorts, Shein’s orange icon letter graphic knot front crop top, and Nike SP Syracuse dunk low sneakers. For her hair, she brushed it into a slicked-back bun with her black Burgundybay acrylic frame glasses and orange Telfar small bag. Looking in the mirror, Azaria applied clear glitter lipgloss on her lips and took a few pictures. Before she left her room, she sprayed her body mist from Bath & Body Works and closed the door behind her. Azaria waited in the living for her two friends since they loved spending their sweet time preparing for any social gathering.

   Huffing through her nose, Azaria threw her head back, annoyed. “Ya’ll come on! We’re just going to see your boyfriends!”

“Girl shut up, we’re coming!” Imani yelled from inside the guest room.

“It takes time to look this good,” Samra remarked, poking her head out the door.

   Upon seeing Azaria’s outfit, she gasped, saying, “Oh girl, you look good. Who’re you looking cute for?”

“Would you finish getting dressed and come one, please,” Azaria replied, rolling her eyes.

“What’re you rushing for? You wanna see Spooky that bad, huh?” Samara joked, playfully teasing her friend.

“Girl, I’m not looking cute for him or anybody else.” Azaria lied, rolling her eyes. She didn’t know what to think, knowing she would see Spooky after all these years.

“Man, miss me with that bullshit,” Samara replied, smacking her lips, retrieving back inside the room.

   Don’t get her wrong, Azaria was happy yet nervous to see him again. She wondered if he was in a relationship and how he’d react when he saw her again. Did he think about her as much as she did him? Azaria didn’t know.

   Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Samara and Imani walked into the living room, dressed.

“I love your outfit. Where’d you get it?” Imani questioned, checking her best friend out.

“Shein and Nike.” Azaria smiled, posing for her.

“So fucking cute.” Imani complimented, nodding in approval.

   The three friends took pictures of each other for Instagram before exiting Azaria’s house and heading toward the party.

[stargirlposts]

El Malo

CHAPTER 2

(I know I took quiet a minute to post this but I lost my drafts in my old phone cause it fell in water 😭 and I didn’t back anything up but it’s here it also took a while cause I don’t really like how it turned out im having major writers block so some feedback would be great ps. Thank you for the likes and reposts it means a lot to me

I couldn’t sleep all night after Cesar told me that Oscar is getting out tomorrow. I don’t know what to expect or what’s gonna happen. I cuddled up on the couch as I thought back to when Oscar and I were younger. Him and I had always known each other, not personally but my house was down the street from his, so when I would walk to school, I would walk past his house . As we got older, Oscar and I always exchanged glances but we never talked.

I had never even told my friends about the glances that we shared, he didn’t tell his friends either, it was just something between us. I can still remember when one day I saw him with those beautiful dark curls and the next day it was all gone. Or when I saw his Santos tattoo for the first time.

I always thought Oscar was attractive but I wouldn’t ever dare act on it. He was a santo and I was a goody two-shoes, I never thought he was interested in me. I was the complete opposite of the ideal girl for him in the position he was in as a santo. But he didn’t care about that. He was different. He is different.

But, I’m concerned about how Oscar getting out is gonna affect Cesar. He seemed real distant after he told me that Oscar is getting out. I’m scared about what’s gonna happen

Cesar and another santo went to pick Oscar up, I didn't want to stick around for when they would come back so I decided to go to my mom’s house.

“Mija, you can't hide here forever. You’ll have to face him eventually” my mom stated softly as she stroked my hair lovingly.

“I thought you didn’t want me anywhere near him” I stated as I turned to look at her.

“And I don’t, I told you multiple times when you were a teen not to go anywhere near him and that he was no good for you but look where we are now “

I rolled my eyes with a sigh, “ I have Tony, he’s good for me, isn’t he?”

“Well, from what you’ve told me he is but I’m your mom, I know you don’t love him”

“I don’t know how to leave him, he’s been so good to me but he’s just not-“

“He’s not Oscar “ she started cutting me, “ You’re gonna hurt him if you keep lying princess”

“I told myself I’d learn to love him and I will, it’s just taking a while”

My phone buzzed and I looked to see it was a notification from Cesar

Cesar💙: he’s out.. we’re heading back now

I turned my phone off and told my mom I was going to my room. I was gonna relax and take a nice bath and everything was gonna be fine.

I was writing in my journal when I heard a knock on my door and my mom opening the door halfway.

“Caesar is here to see you ,” she smiled softly and patted Cesar on his shoulder.

“ Hey, Cesar” I said to him as I put my notebook in my bedside drawer.

I saw his eyes looked red and I tugged his wrist to sit down on my bed.

“What happened, what’s wrong?”

“Oscar is forcing me into the gang, I don't want to Y/N..”

We both knew this was gonna happen even before Oscar got arrested.

“Do you want me to talk to him even though I really don’t want to see him but you know I’d do anything for you..”

“We both know nothing's gonna change his mind, I’m scared of him, I don’t think even you could change his mind..He asked about you, I think he wants to see you”

I rolled my eyes but I’m not gonna lie and say that didn’t warm my heart. My mom knocked on my door telling me that she was gonna do a quick run at the store and then pass by Geny’s house. My mom and her were very close practically sisters. Cesar and I talked but then he got a message from Oscar so I walked him to the door, but when I opened it, I felt my heart beat a million times more..there he was the love of my life, Oscar Diaz.

Cesar cleared his throat and started walking out “I’ll wait in the car”

The 1966 Cherry red Chevy Impala. Oscar and I share a lot of memories together in that car.

“You’re not gonna give me a welcome home hug”

I finally looked up at him.

“I’m seeing someone Oscar” I stated as I crossed my arm, and looked down. As much as I wanted to hug him and kiss him, I couldn’t.

He chuckled at this “Yea, I’ve heard, but he’s not me, you’re still mine Y/N..”

“Oscar, it’s not the same anymore”

“You can lie to yourself but we both know, you still love the way I still love you” he gently touched my chin and closed the door, leaving me to wipe away my own tears.

[simplegenius042]

OC Inspiration Game

Tagged by @imogenkol

Tagging @socially-awkward-skeleton @noodlecupcakes @voidika @skoll-sun-eater @josephseedismyfather @aceghosts @inafieldofdaisies @icecutioner @derelictheretic @shallow-gravy @shellibisshe @direwombat @strangefable @rhettsabbott @josephslittledeputy @cloudofbutterflies92 @cassietrn @carlosoliveiraa @adelaidedrubman @g0dspeeed @wrathfulrook @afarcryfrommymain @strafethesesinners @turbo-virgins @raresvtm @softtidesworld @starsandskies @ladyoriza @la-grosse-patate @florbelles @titiagls @minilev @yokobai @thewanderer-000 @omen-speaker @justasmolbard @alypink @thesingularityseries @nightwingshero and @lulu2992 + anyone else who'd like to join.

Decided to do 10 OCs; five for my protagonists, and another five for my antagonists. You can find them under the cut:

rules: share your oc and two characters from other media that influenced them the most

JOAQUIN COBALT (THE UNTITLEDVERSE)

Will Byers (Stranger Things) | Viktor Hargreeves (The Umbrella Academy)

ZACHARIAH THE ORCHESTRATOR (THE UNTITLEDVERSE)

Khan Makyr (DOOM: Eternal) | Odin (God Of War: Ragnarok)

SILVA OMAR (THE SILVER CHRONICLES [FAR CRY 5 & FAR CRY NEW DAWN])

Rosa Diaz (Brooklyn Nine-Nine) | Beatrix "the Bride" Kiddo (Kill Bill) | Julie Canaro (Superfast!)

PAUL YELLOWJACK (VARIOUS)

Pagan Min (Far Cry 4) | The Elktaur (Centaurworld)

HAOYU ANABUKI (LIFE, DESPAIR & MONSTERS)

Raine Whispers (The Owl House) | Aang (Avatar The Last Airbender (2005))

SIR ENIGMA MALVOLIO (LIFE, DESPAIR & MONSTERS & THE UNTITLEDVERSE [RED DEAD REDEMPTION 2])

Hugo Strange (Gotham) | Kenjaku (Jujutsu Kaisen)

MARISSA "RESS" BISHOP (A RADIOACTIVE CALAMITY OF LOVE, BOMBS & GORE [FALLOUT])

Valeria Garza (Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 (2022)) | Satoru Gojo (Jujutsu Kaisen)

ARCANE URIAS (A RADIOACTIVE CALAMITY OF LOVE, BOMBS & GORE [FALLOUT])

Toji Fushiguro (Jujutsu Kaisen) | Proximus Caesar (Kingdom Of The Planet Of The Apes)

AZRIEL OMAR (VARIOUS)

Jinx (Arcane: League Of Legends) | Ellie Williams (The Last Of Us (2023)) | Izabella (Transformers: The Last Knight)

AGGRAVOR THE ACCURSED (VARIOUS)

Mahito (Jujutsu Kaisen) | Koba (Planet Of The Apes Trilogy)

[thekristen999]

Inspiration Saturday.

Thank you to @spotsandsocks​ for tagging me.

I’m slowly making progress on the mafia AU :) The steady turtle wins the race!

Wandering over to where Eddie was standing, Buck whispered in his ear. "It would be taken as an insult if you don’t sit and join us."

Eddie glanced at where Bobby was still humming around the kitchen. Buck knew the mental gymnastics one went through when comparing Bobby in person to the rumors about him, but then again, most rumors held a kernel of truth.

That’s what made them so believable. And dangerous.

Taking the seat next to Buck, Eddie waited until Bobby brought out a giant crystal bowl of greens, smiling in anticipation."This looks great, I love Caesar salad."

Chim froze and Buck grimaced. Bobby looked like he might bop Eddie over the head with one of his tongs. "Mr. Diaz, you get salad from a salad bar. This is an arrangement of sun-dried tomatoes and crunchy pine nuts atop lightly charred romaine, drizzled with a Dijon-garlic mixture and fried polenta croutons."

Buck took advantage of Eddie’s distraction and poured him a glass of wine when he wasn’t looking. After almost unintentionally insulting Bobby’s food, Eddie was going to have to be on his best behavior.

Picking up the glass, Eddie cast a quick, but sharp look of annoyance at Buck before sipping it.

Bobby waited in anticipation, Eddie hmmming in appreciation under his breath.

"A great vintage, wasn’t it?" Bobby inquired.

Eddie plastered the fakest smile Buck had ever seen on him. "Sure was."

...

Tagging for Saturday or Sunday!  @mellaithwen​ @renecdote​ @homerforsure​ @shortsighted-owl​ @mysteriouslyyounggalaxy​ @fleurdebeton​ @andavs​ @megsvstheworld​ @alyxmastershipper​ @the-likesofus​ and anyone else who wants to play.

[schismusic]

Psychohistory and the eternal people: Russian Ark and my grandpa's demise

[Disclaimer: for obvious reasons, this post deals in heavy subject matters regarding family death, natural disasters, and (worst of all) potential spoilers for Aleksandr Sokurov's Russian Ark. Reader's discretion is advised.]

So, remember when in the Ferrari post I said:

"We were at my grandparents' for Christmas and as we drove through the town my father looked out of the car's window and saw an obituary with his last name on it. I didn't quite catch who exactly it was and how they were related to us - and rest assured they most likely were, it's an Abruzzo thing. As most of my family's deaths, as discussed on my Godflesh post, were on my mother's side, to see my father's last name on a mortuary announcement was a bit of a surprise, in that as you probably can imagine it's also my last name. It's a new experience which, in total frankness, I don't exactly hope to replicate soon."

…anyways, July 17th, 2024 I get a phone call around 7:15pm. Grandpa is dead. Not like we didn't know, right — I hadn't been sleeping for days just so I could be awake when the phone call hit. Kidney collapse usually takes between twenty-four and forty-eight hours to get your ass. Grandpa took five days. Could have been three but the pacemaker did its job, unfortunately (not being able to contain any sort of discharge liquid is, how could I say?, immensely painful and irreversible). I had been living alone for the past three days, surviving on an empty fridge and anything canned I could find in my parents' house, working on my bachelor's thesis. Sometimes I'd watch a movie or something. So I'm reading this book on digital cinema — photonumerical, rather, as in it's still shot irl by an actual camcorder and not computer-generated — and of course Sokurov's Russian Ark gets namedropped in there. It's only one hour and a half anyways, so whatever, I watch it while eating lunch, i.e. canned tuna and perhaps salad from some kind of fucking plastic package.

Russian Ark takes every available opportunity to destroy flatness and depth, mixing them up into indistinction. Since the camera is constantly moving, zoom-ins and zoom-outs lose the exact sense of dimension. Objects, people and locales in the frame get squished, morphed, moved, and this is especially evident in Sokurov's frequent closeups on paintings. Usually never shot head-on, generally favouring an angled view of their surface, moving closer or further, left or right, up or down, slowly zooming in or our, paintings suffer the same effect as the three-dimensional objects of the movie, and therefore become one with them, achieving a manner of three-dimensionality and motion. Custine's impassioned reading of a Flemish painted interior (a Rembrandt, if memory serves) underlines all these moving elements, or elements that should be moving:

"Rags… a dog… eternal people…"

And it's these eternal people who "live and go on living… you'll outlive them all". It's these eternal people who gain motion in this medium, as opposed to all the non-eternal people who remain for all intents and purposes confined within the ark itself. History is a trap and art is perennially tasked to find a way to escape it, whether it realizes or not. A psychological (psychic?) reading of history, not too far away from psychogeographical practices, could be on display here: and while it may be much easier to be psychologically influenced by, say, the way a place looks rather than the mythologized recollection of a historical figure, as it stands a lot of people still romanticize and/or fantasize about Julius Caesar or general Armando Diaz or Dante Alighieri. Why not Catherine the Great or Peter the Great or Nicholas II's children then?

Russian Ark is not a particularly accurate historical movie. It's certainly very concerned with aesthetic matters first and foremost — as in, it mostly cares for its scenes to stick the emotional landing regardless of who is being portrayed, most of the time: does Sokurov really expect me to get emotional for the Romanovs? — and its whirlwind nature makes it especially hard to know what the fuck is going on if you don't know much about Russian history itself, mostly because the movie often flatout refuses to make itself clear. But this last thing is no issue to me. This should come as no surprise to anyone who can remember what my all-time favourite movies are. Miami Vice (2006) straight up hates you, the viewer, and dumps kilos upon kilos of technobabble and contrived dialogue on your ass only to hit you later with incredible aerial shots of a motorboat — I'm sorry, I do mean a go-fast boat — crossing the sea, where two people are passionately looking at each other and all of a sudden the movie finds its punctum, its center of interest. INLAND EMPIRE needs no introduction, mostly because I wouldn't know where to start giving one to it. The Warriors is a Walter Hill movie and as such it hates talking. Una giornata particolare rests on quite specific knowledge of practices against political dissidents in fascist Italy, but also loves to make references that would be impossible to catch if you don't know anything about contemporary Italy either (my favourite is when it reminds its audience that Giovanni Agnelli was a senator under Mussolini, wherein in the current day the Agnelli family basically own half of this country's industrial strength, and change). Mark Fisher still said it best: "[…] as Deleuze says in The Logic of Sense, why, if superficiality is defined as lack of depth, is depth not defined as lack of surface?".

Right before the funeral, my mother remarked that my sister looks a lot like my grandpa in some ways. Of course, my sister wasn't exactly amused by that comment, considering she's a sixteen-year-old girl and he was an eightyfive-year-old man with five sons of his own, so my mom decided to delve deeper into that mentioning exact points of comparison (my favourite was the nose, notoriously massive for every person in my father's family) and then went on to say "oh, but look, Grandpa used to be quite handsome when he was younger!". As a Star Trek enjoyer, it was hard not to mention that "handsome is what you call old women" while throwing your drink on Captain Picard's lapel.

Russian Ark celebrates a place (the Winter Palace, in Saint Petersburg) just as much as it celebrates the hundreds of years of human beings within it. Aleksandr Sokurov, I'm willing to bet, did not personally know everyone who ever lived there; the same operation directed by you and set in a generic apartment building in your area would probably yield more personal results. Russia's history is turned into a recombining mishmash by the fall of the Berlin Wall, but if you think about it anyone has cataclysmic events that force us to reconsider and recatalogue, leaving us with a jumbled, freely-associated mess of data, events, information. This mess allows for new connections to be born. Associations previously thought inadequate, inappropriate or simply impossible are now the first thing that springs to mind. Details are lost to time, then found at the next cataclysm, traded for others. Alain Resnais called memory an "evident necessity", which automatically entails that the processes of memorization (which includes forgetting, distancing effects, etc.) are themselves inevitable, if painful. Why deny it?, he rightfully asks.

My mate F.'s house was declared unsafe to inhabit after the August 2016 earthquake. It stood empty for about a year or two, then got demolished in (I think) 2019. For a really long time, all you could see were bits and pieces of the original tiling in the kitchen, the ascending line of paint that followed the stairs, the master bedroom's wallpaper. Pressed two-dimensionally against otherwise whitewashed walls, they projected outward their original full form, yearned for it to me. All of their history, or at least all of the history I had made experience of, sort of manifested itself, unfolded at random, reminded me of an offhand comment I'd heard once, or of that one time that F.'s grandfather had made it abundantly clear that I should avoid Psychology uni. The guy had been a Marxist-Leninist militant in the '50s and '60s, so I can at least justify his distaste.

After the pandemic, it took them about three years to actually get the work on the house started. When I came to visit Grandpa in the hospital, last June, I took the time to pass by and saw that it actually had been structured. They're changing the layout of the whole house, thank God, because the original structure always struck me as surprisingly inefficient and contrived. When the house is back up, I know it will not be the same thing, because the places themselves where the memories had been will no longer be there. But there will be an echo of aunt L. stuck in the new living room's ceiling, a past version of F.'s parents calling at us to get ready for dinner from across an empty expanse where there used to be a wall, or a door, F.'s dad's PlayStation One hooked up to a TV right in the middle of what used to be a tiled floor.

The process of historicization isn't that far off, anyway. Mythologizing practices are inherent in historiography, both folk and academic. This one scholar specializing in Carnival rites of Northern Italy went near Brescia once, in the mid-1900s, and asked a middle-aged farmer about traditional Carnival rites currently in practice at the time. The farmer described the current rites, then added that "after the Council of Trent, Carnival has become much worse". Quite flabbergasted, as there was no chance in hell that the woman had received education about an ecclesiastic event that took place in 1545, the scholar asked the lady if she knew when the Council of Trent had happened, and her reply was: "It must have been when my grandmother was alive or when my mother was young, because I wasn't born yet". Russian Ark takes the next logical step: everything happens all the time. No strong narratives means you make up your own, for better or worse. We all live in a yellow submarine, or more precisely in Noah's Ark, and every one of our arks is shaped slightly differently. Mine looks like a mountainside two-floor house that's painted white, where a lot of people come for big dinner parties just about every weekend of August, where my grandpa is sitting on a plastic chair, lighting a cigarette, silently watching around, smiling at the beauty and bustle of life. How does that one Fellini line go, from the end of 8½? "È una festa, la vita…"

[sessayyys-corner]

MALLARI (2023) - MMFF REVIEW

“‘Di ba’t isang sumpa ang magmahal?”

Mallari does not only showcase the story of the infamous Fr. Severino Mallari, but also delves into the lives of men from succeeding generations of his clan. The first descendant, Johnrey, a documentary filmmaker in post World War II Philippines, and the second being Jonathan De Dios, a doctor and the lead protagonist of the film. The two descendants of Fr. Severino try to discover their family’s darkest secret, which most likely has contributed to the killings and disappearances in Magalang, Pampanga.

All three generations of the Mallari clan are played by Piolo Pascual, which is perceived to be difficult parts to play. However, Pascual was able to to help distinguish one generation from another and yet was able to establish the connection between all three characters.

What also is depicted in the movie is the presence of important female figures in each of the Mallari men’s lives: Dona Facunda, Fr. Severino’s mother played by Ms. Gloria Diaz, Felicity, Johnrey’s wife played by Elisse Joson, and Agnes, Jonathan’s fiancee played by Janella Salvador. All three actresses gave the three women their respective well-defined characters which was able to show how each Mallari’s love for these women had urged them to take greater lengths, even if it will cost them their own morals.

JC Santos does an excellent job in portraying Brother Lucas in the likeness of Brutus from Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar, as he showcases his character’s loyalty and later betrayal to Pascual’s Dr. Jonathan.

The film may remind one of Luca Guadagnino’s Bones and All (2022) with its presence of common themes such as gore and manslaughter. It is also important to note how both Carido and Guadagnino have commonly used manslaughter as a dark metaphor for love as a motive of sacrifice and self-discovery, which the former has executed very well and evidently in Mallari (2023). It also bears similarities with Edgar Wright’s Last Night in Soho (2021) not just with the presence of gore and manslaughter, but also with the key theme of time travel, which the two Mallari descendants have used in order to learn about the dark secret of their family for this film.

The film had a well-organized flow of events, as well as a smooth transition in between time periods. It was able to give me and other viewers proper context and a good idea on how to let the story unfold and think about what could happen next. However, Jonathan’s arc was very anti-climactic towards the end yet it established his arc as an anti-hero.

Another thing to love about this film is that not only did it have Gothic themes and the use of the Catholic faith, which are associated as Western literary and cultural elements, but it also incorporated the use of Filipino folk medicine and faith healing, which are indigenous Filipino cultural elements, as important parts of the film.

In conclusion, Mallari (2023) was a great watch, and it definitely deserved the accolades. Not only did it bring justice to a dark love metaphor, but it also presented and promoted Filipino culture through folk medicine as key horror elements. It is a must watch for traditional Filipino horror movie buffs and those in need of a fresh face to Filipino horror films.

[Metro Manila Film Festival 2023]

RATING - ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️.5

(review is also available on letterboxd!)

[jhdanes]

Another baby oc for the line up, this one from the fandom svtfoe for my fancomic The council.

[muffinworry]

Roman Republic Reading List

@hortensius : Hope this is helpful!

Comprehensive Exam, Major Field: Roman History, c. 400-100                        

Preliminary Reading List--Updated

General

Rosenstein, Rome and the Mediterranean (2012) [general survey]

Steel, End of the Roman Republic (2012) [general survey]

Flower, Roman Republics (2010)

Lomas, Roman Italy 338 BC-AD 200 (this is a sourcebook with introductory discussions)

Farney/Bradley, Peoples of Ancient Italy (2017) (a reference handbook)

Early Republic

Cornell, Beginnings of Rome (1996)

Forsythe, A Critical History of Early Rome (2006)

Armstrong, War and Society in Early Rome (2016)

Lomas, Rise of Rome (2018)

Smith, The Roman Clan (2009)

Armstrong, War and Society in Early Rome: From Warlords to Generals (2016)

Raaflaub (ed), Social Struggle in Archaic Rome, 2nd ed. (2008)* [edited volume with a lot of good chapters, especially Raaflaub, Cornell, Richard, Mitchell, Lindferski]

Terrenato, The early Roman expansion into Italy. Elite negotiation and family agendas (2019)

Middle Republic: Imperialism

Earlier period

Hölkeskamp, “Conquest, competition and consensus: Roman expansion in Italy and the rise of the nobilitas,” Historia 42 (1993) 12-39

Raaflaub, "Born to be Wolves? Origins of Roman Imperialism," in E. Harris & R. W. Wallace (eds.), Transitions to Empire in the Graeco-Roman World, 360-146 B.C. (1996) 273-314.

Terrenato, Early Roman Expansion into Italy (2019)

Fronda, Between Rome and Carthage (2011)

Motives, nature of Roman Expansion (the “Harris debate”)

Harris, War and Imperialism in Republican Rome (1979)

North, Development of Roman Imperialism (review of Harris), JRS 71 (1981) 1-9

Sherwin-White, Rome the Aggressor? (review of Harris), JRS 70 (1980) 177-181

Rich, Fear Greed and Glory: the Causes of Roman War Making in the Middle Republic, in Rich/Shipley, War and Society in the Roman World (1995) 38-68

Eckstein, Senate and General (1987)

Eckstein, Mediterranean Anarchy, Interstate War, and the Rise of Rome (2007)

Griffin, “Iure Plectimur. The Roman Critique of Roman Imperialism.” In Brennan and Flower (eds) East & West. Papers in Ancient History Presented to Glenn W. Bowersock (2008) [gives insight into why Roman historians give speeches to enemies of Rome, which could tie into presentation of captives]

Riggsby, Caesar in Gaul and Rome: War of Words (2021)

Provincialization, also response to Harris

Richardson, Hispaniae (1989)

Gruen, Hellenistic World and Coming of Rome (1986)

Kallett-Marx, Hegemony to Empire (1996)

Diaz Fernandez, Provinces and Provincial Command in republican Rome (2021)

Roman Political Culture (middle and late RP, and the democracy question)

Feig Vishnia, State, Society, and Popular Leaders in Mid-Republican Rome (2011) [possibly get rid of one of the older Gracchi treatments]

Hölkeskamp, Reconstructing the Roman Republic (2010)

Hölkeskamp, “The Roman Republic : government of the people, by the people, for the people ?,” Scripta Classical Israeilica 19 (2000) 203-223

Munzer, Roman Aristocratic Parties and Families (trans. 1999, orig. 1920)

Hopkins, Death and Renewal (1985) pp. 31-119

Lintott, Democracy in the Middle Republic

North, “Democratic Politics in Republican Rome,” Past & Present 126 (1990) 3-21

Millar, Crowd in Republican Rome (2002)

Millar, Political Character of the Classical Roman Republic, JRS 74 (1984) 1-19

Morstein-Marx, Mass Oratory and Political Power in the Late Roman Republican (2007)

North, Politics and Aristocracy in the Roman Republic, Classical Philology 85 (1990) 277-287

Lintott, Violence in Republican Rome (1999)                           

Wiseman, New Men in the Roman Senate (1972)

Archaeology/Topography and politics:

Davies, Architecture and Politics in Republican Rome (2017)

Russell, The Politics of Public Space in Republican Rome (2015)

Roman magistracies

Brennan Praetorship in the Republic (2000)

Beck, Duplá, jehnem Pina Polo (eds), Consuls and Res Publica: Holding High Office in the Roman Republic (2011)

Pina Polo, Quaestorship, Quaesorship in the Roman Republic (2019)

Wilson, Dictator: Evolutionof the Roman Dictatorship (2021)

Roman Religion/Religion and Politics

Beard, North and Price, Religions of Rome v. 1 and v. 2

Orlin, Temples, Religion and Politics

Rosenstein, Imperatores Victi

Gruen, Studies in Greek Culture and Roman Policy (various chapters on Magna Mater an Bacchanalia)

Stek, Cult Places and Cultural Change in Republican Italy

Beard, Roman Triumph (??)

Pedilla Peralta, Divine Institutions: Religions and Community in the Middle Republic (2020)

J. Mackay, Belief and Cult: Rethinking Roman Religion (2022)

Glinister, “Reconsidering ‘Religious Romanization’” YClS 33 (2006) 10-33

Diluzio, A Place at the Altar (2017) [on priestesses]

Middle Republic: Second Century/Lead-up to the Gracchi

Hopkins, Conquerors and Slaves (1981), esp. pp. 1-95

Rosenstein, Rome at War (2004)

Cornell, Hannibal’s Legacy: the effect of the Hannibal War on Italy, in Cornell/Rankov/Sabin, Second Punic War: a Reappraisal (1996)

Stockton, the Gracchi (1979) [older, “standard” treatment]

Earl, Tiberius Gracchus a Study in Politics (1963) [another old one; consult some of the reviews, e.g Brunt in Gnomon, Scullard in JRS, Crake in Phoenix)

Toynbee, Hannibal’s Legacy: the Hannibalic War’s Effects of Roman Life (1965) [very long; minimally understand the arguments and read reviews]

Brunt, Roman Manpower 225BC-AD14 (1971, republ. 1987) [very long]

There is a fair amount of archaeological work on second-century BC Italy.

Roman Italy, Romanization, Roman conquest of Italy:

Keay/Terrenato, Italy and the West (2001), just part 1 on the republic

Dench, From barbarians to new men: Greek, Roman, and modern perceptions of peoples from the central Apennines (1995)

Lomas, Rome and the Western Greeks (1993)

Bradley, Ancient Umbria: Stated Culture and Identity (2001)

Terrenato, Romanization of Italy: Global Acculturation or Cultural Bricolage, in Theoretical Roman Archaeology (1997) 20-27

Terrenato, Tam Firmum Municipium: the Romanization of Volaterrae and its Cultural Implications, JRS 88 (1998) 94-114

Terrenato, Early Roman Expansion into Italy (2019) [listed above]

Fronda, Between Rome and Carthage (2010) (intro section only)

Roselaar (ed), Processes of Integration and Identity Formation in the Roman Republic (2012) [lots of great chapters, especially by Roth, Rosenstein, Roselaar, Lomas, Patterson]

De Giorgi, Cosa and the Colonial Landscape of Colonial Italy (2019)

David, La Romanisation de l’Italie (1994) [= The Roman Conquest of Italy (1996)]

Glinister, “Reconsidering ‘Religious Romanization’” YClS 33 (2006) 10-33

Roth, Styling Romanization (2007)


Salmon, The Making of Roman Italy (1982)

Roman-Italian elite connections

Patterson, “Contact, Cooperation and Conflict in Pre-Social War Italy,” in Roselaar, 215-226

Patterson, “The Relationship of the Italian ruling Classes with Rome,” in Jehne/Pfeilschifter, Herrschaft und Integration? Rom und Italien in republikanischer Zeit (2006) 139-153.

Terrenato, "Tam firmum municipium: the Romanization of Volaterrae and its cultural implication" JRS 99  (1998) 94-114.

Wiseman, New Men in the Roman Senate

Late Republic: the Italian Question and the Social War

Brunt, “Italian Aims at the Time of the Social War,” JRS 55 (1965) 90-109

Dart, The 'Italian Constitution' in the Social War: A Reassessment (91 to 88 BCE) Historia 58 (2009), 215-224

Pobjoy, “The First Italia,” in Herring and Lomas, The Emergence of State Identities in Italy 187-211

Mouritsen, Italian Unification (1998)

Keaveney, Rome and the Unification of Italy, 2nd ed. (2005)

Howarth, Rome, the Italians, and the Land, Historia 48 (1999) 282-300

Nagle, “An Allied View of the Social War,” AJA 77 (1973) 367-78


Dart, The Social War, 91 to 88 BCE: A History of the Italian Insurgency against the Roman Republic (2014)

Late Republic: From Sulla to the Fall of Republic

Gruen, Last Generation of the Roman Republic, revised (1995) plus read reviews since this was not well received.

Piacentin, Financial Penalties in the Roman Republic (2022)

Taylor, Party Politics in the Age of Caesar (outdated: find reviews to understand the main arguments)

Morstein-Marx, Mass Oratory and Political power in the Late Republic (2008)

Rosillo Lopez, Political conversations in Late Republican Rome (2021)

Rosenblitt, Rome after Sulla (2019)

Pina Polo, The triumviral period: civil war, political crisis and socioeconomic transformations (2020)

Lintott, Violence in Republican Rome (1999)

Kelly, A History of Exile in the Roman Republic (2006)

Riggsby, Crime and Community in Ciceronian Rome (1999)

Augustus’ ‘Revolution’

Syme, Roman Revolution (1939) (a classic)

Raflaub/Toher (eds), Between Republic and Empire (1993)* [edited volume, excellent introductory chapter by Galsterer, plus other good historical chapters: Meier, Eder, Luce, Gruen]

Zanker, Power of Images in the Age of Augustus (1990)* (another classic)

Roman Military

Pfeilschifter, “The allies in the Republican army and the Romanization of Italy,” in Roth and Keller, Roman by Integration: Dimensions of Group Identity in Material Culture and Text (2007) 27-42

Jessica Clark. Triumph in Defeat: Military Loss and the Roman Republic. Oxford and New York: Oxford University Press, 2014

Rosenstein, Imperatores Victi: Military Defeat and Aristocratic Competition in the Middle and Late Republic (1990)

Keppie, Making of the Roman Army: from Republic to Empire (1998) [survey introduction]

Goldsworthy, Roman Army at War 100BC-AD 200 (1998)

Armstrong and Fronda (eds), Romans at War: Soldiers, Citizens and Society in Republican Rome (2020)

Daly, Cannae: Experience of battle in the Second Punic War (2003)

Slavery and Captives (starter bibliography)

Hopkins, Conquerers and Slaves (1981)

S. Joshel, Slavery in the Roman World (2010)

K. Bradley, Slavery and Rebellion in the Roman World, 140-70BC (1989)

K. Bradley, Slaves and masters in the Roman empire. A study in social control (1989)

K. Bradley, Slavery and society at Rome (1994)

K. Huemoeller, “Captivity for all ?: slave status and prisoners of war in the Roman Republic,” TAPA 115 (2021)

Henige, “He came, He Saw, We counted: the Historiography and Demography of Caesar's Gallic Numbers,” Annales de démographie historique (1998)

Lowe, "Prisoners, Guards, and Chains in Plautus, Captivi" AJP (1991)

Marshall, The Stagecraft and Performance of Roman Comedy (2006)

Richlin, Slave Theater in the Roman Republic (2017)

Scheidel, "Human Mobility in Roman Italy II: the Slave Population,” JRS (2005)

Scheidel and Harper, "Roman Slavery and the Idea of Slave Society" in Lenski/Cameron (eds) What Is a Slave Society (2018)

Scheidel, "The Roman Slave Supply" in Bradley/Cartledge (eds) Cambridge World History of Slavery (2011)

Thalmann, "Versions of Slavery in the Captivi of Plautus" Ramus (1996)

[lemoncheesecakecoffeecrumble]

A Poem of Woe: A Literary Analysis on the Anthology, ”Lockdown Litanies: Countless Untold Stories” a Paper by Alessandra Micaella Diaz

While reading the poems, It is evidence that, despite the fact that everything in the world is beautiful, we sometimes find beauty to be heartbreaking. This is similar to how this poem is a masterpiece, but it still saddens me. I'm reminded of a few things after reading it. A flawless sand structure will be swept away by the currents in a minute or two, regardless of how long I observe it. A sunset that is so flawless it overflows into the sky. Or a classical picture, languishing in a museum like a lonely prisoner, can never be finished no matter how long you stare at it. But maybe being fragile is part of being beautiful. Perhaps there is always room for improvement in the arts, whether through erasure or transformation.

I realized as I was reading Dear Diary that nothing, not even you, is ever genuinely eternal. It makes me sad to think that it will always remain a part of us despite our best efforts. The only option left to us is to try our best to cope. Because of this line in the poem, "Meeting strangers for warmth and solace, wanting for more but all was left in me, I ended up alone," the first song that came to mind was I'm With You - Avril Lavigne (Lyrics) 🎵. Her song is about trying to distract herself from loneliness by meeting strangers and figuring out her life. It shows that everything will change, so prepare for it.

One of my favorite poems was the second one. It makes me think of the 2022 election, especially with regard to Leni Robredo, our former vice president. I'll never forget how she raised our hopes for a better presidency, but, as in the poem, she lost. Furthermore, we see how she gets up and continues to think of ways to help us, exactly like in the poem. When you read the poem and the song ROSAS (OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO) simultaneously, the music hits differently.

This poem makes me feel as though I could write someone using the most complex adjectives from my vocabulary, write them on aromatic paper, and send them white roses as a gesture of appreciation. However, despite the years passing, I have yet to come up with a different way to quit writing for you. It is as if I wrote everything for the men who crossed my path while still thinking of you. It has some connection to Joji - Glimpse of Us Like Yayi felt between her husband and Dante, the lyrics that truly got to me were "Why then, if she is so perfect, do I still wish that it was you?"

Two Red Lace on the Wonderwall is comparable to meeting someone who then introduces you to an entirely new realm that you had no idea existed. A setting where you can be who you are, even when you're with that person. A world where you can finally hold someone in reality—someone who tells you what you want to hear and listens to what you want to say—and where you can stop visualizing yourself in a make-believe setting. Someone who gives meaning to love songs once more. A person who seems too good to be true but is in fact true. Because of how she describes the man, and if you read the poem again, it states there that she already tried it with several men, it's similar to the line from the song "If Life Is a Movie Then You're the Best Part" Daniel Caesar & H.E.R - Best Part (Lyrics)

It is about a child who values his mother as well as the mother who represents how wonderful ladies can be. Tragically, life keeps us from living in a way that is empty of pain. The poem makes me think of a line from Ariana Grande - God is a woman (Lyric Video): "You, you love it how I move you. You love it how I touch you." The line may not make sense to other people, but it makes me think of a child appreciating and adoring his mother for taking wonderful care of him.

Callousness is shown in the poem RE: Paper (I'm Red, IMRaD)*. There is absolutely nothing wrong with aiming for a greater state of education, but a lack of capabilities can crush the dreams of young people who had high hopes of finishing their studies early to enable them to bring food for their family, to help the parents who has to carry out two jobs to pay for tuition. I am sure that those decisions were carefully considered, but there were numerous students and families who had hardships concerning that statement.The song "Shawn Desman - Difference (Philippine Poverty)" comes to mind when I read this.

It's difficult to forget that everything has an end because of the cruelty of this world, but it must be remembered. Our daily burdens might be small or so heavy that we are no longer able to shoulder them. If we don't correctly employ our thoughts, it will poison us. It creates scenes and motion pictures that could exist inside of us. Just terrible that some people allowed it to enter their minds. The poem gave me a glimpse into the mind of a self-murderer. $uicideBoy$ – ...And To Those I Love, Thanks For Sticking Around (Lyric Video) is the poem that goes with it.

Our wellbeing is impacted by certain people's viewpoints, which can make us feel alone, unheard, and kept in the dark. The poem My Frail Lady struck me for how inviting and soothing it is to read while still invoking powerful emotion. It shows a young woman who committed suicide after searching for serenity and discovering it. The way they made her dying lovely was so well done.Taylor Swift – peace (Official Lyric Video) comes to mind since all she ever wanted was for there to be peace.

It's wonderful to have loved ones that help, support, believe in, and try to comprehend us during times when we don't know what we're all about. In the poem, the fortune teller is the one who makes an effort to comprehend the speaker, acting as though they were giving a friend who needed some guidance, I may connect this poem to Umbrella - Rihanna (Lyrics) 🎵, whose line "You can stand under my umbrella" is equivalent to the phrase "I got your back, dude!"

Last but not least, it is not our fault that we are simply frail, prone to error. Our shortcomings are not our fault. It has been easier for me to grasp how our experiences have influenced both our lives and those around us since this anthology has made me aware of people's diverse personalities and aspects. It gave me a fresh viewpoint on how someone might maintain hope in the midst of tragedy. It shows that even if everything in the world is beautiful, we typically find beauty to be painful.

[frysquint]

🕸 WIPs collecting webs

I was tagged by @lovebuck 💕

Probie firefighter Maddie Buckley - Instead of Buck landing in LA and becoming a firefighter, Maddie is the one who escapes PA and ends up at the 118. She and Eddie are bffs, and she has a fern named Caesar. Buck comes to visit and decides to stay.

Immediately pre-lawsuit au? - Buck goes to Eddie's house after the dinner with Bobby and Athena, and they have emotional sex, which ultimately leads to a different outcome in the lawsuit arc. (Also, no fight club.)

Chef Buck/Surly Food Blogger Eddie - AU. Basically what it says on the tin.

Baby, Let's Talk It Out pt. 3: Christopher Diaz vs. the World - Third part of the series. Chris' pov of the first two parts, basically. Focuses on Chris and Carla. I should really get back to this one.

Kibble verse pt. 2 - Sequel to the dog adoption fic. Kibble gets her first bath lol.

I am lol late with this, but I tag @likeshipsonthesea @brassm @original-jade.

[aresdifesa]

Semoventi Caesar e missili Mistral per la Slovenia Il Sottosegretario di Stato al Ministero della Difesa, Dr. Damir Črnčec, e il Direttore Nazionale degli Armamenti (DGA) del Ministero delle Forze Armate della Repubblica Francese, Generale Gaël Diaz de Tuesta, hanno siglato una Lettera d’Intenti (LOI) per l’acquisto congiunto di semoventi di artiglieria Caesar prodotto da KNDS FR e di sistemi missilistici di difesa aerea Mistral allestiti da MBDA. Questa iniziativa si inserisce nell’Accordo di cooperazione nel settore della difesa tra la Slovenia e la Francia. La firma della Lettera d’Intenti faciliterà ulteriori discussioni sul potenziale acquisto di questi sistemi d’arma dai produttori francesi; infatti, l’acquisizione avverrà alle stesse

[stormoflina]

ohh, and although this is not unpopular nor an opinion, i wanted to share some of my favorite songs to cleanse ur inbox from so much drama omg 😭

Vento Alecrim - Gilsons

End of Beginning - Djo (highly recommend looking up on tiktok an edit of the tv show 'the bear' to this song, sooo good)

Love wins all - IU

melhor sozinha - luísa sonza ft. marília mendonça

Salgo pa la calle - Daddy Yankee

i wanna be your right hand - nemahsis

morfeo - wos

paranormal - tainy ft. Alvaro Diaz

barquinho de papel - anavitória

caesar on a tv screen - the last dinner party

lobster - boy called cute

suéltame, Bogotá - diamante eléctrico

how to disappear completely - radiohead

purge the poison - MARINA

just like a movie - wallows

Caminando - isadora

00:00 - bts

there are a few languages in there so u might need to look up the translation for some of them if u want, but they are really good! hope u listen to them and it helps ur inbox to look a little less heavy 🫡

- long ass rant anon ❤️

My dear anon, thank you so much for sending them to me.!! Can't wait to listen to them all!

♥️🫶🏼