#delphine had every reason to suspect shay

[razzmtazz]

bruh rewatching orphan black i rly feel like delphine/cosima/shay is the only love triangle done right in the history of ever

[zordonmlw7]

Orphan Black Headcanons: Friends and Family

Felix- flaming since preschool babey! Pretended to be straight in high school but literally no one believed him. Not that he wanted it to be believable.

Siobhan- definitely has been with her fair share of women but still identifies as straight for some reason. I like to imagine if she had survived she would have found a pretty older woman to be her second love.

Vic- has given blowjobs for cocaine before but that's about it

Kira- NO CHILDREN

Amelia- has been in one relationship her whole life but it was probably with a man

Cal- his cousin tried to fool around with him once but he was NOT cool with it. Tbh Sarah is probably the first person he's actually ever considered actually committing to.

Benjamin Kertland- is gay and has a husband who even after all these years doesn't question all the shady stuff his husband gets into

Kendall- If bastard can be someone's sexuality, that's hers. But for reals probably swings both ways.

Adele- hetero flexible all the way. And it's not always because of the alcohol

Collin- tried dating a girl in high school but it didn't work out. Suspected he was gay beforehand but that was definitely the thing that made him sure. Because apparently dreaming of Justin Timberlake shirtless and sweaty wasn't enough for him.

Art- straight. Has never even questioned his sexuality in his life. If he ever did he'd probably have an existential crisis that ends in him realizing he's still probably straight.

Paul- has DEFINITELY bottomed for some of his fellow military men. Identifies as straight though.

Angie- is a zedromantic ace but has not figured it out yet. Goes home from hook ups feeling like something is wrong with her. :(

Raj- straight, but has only been with one person in high school, who broke up with him right after taking his virginity.

Donnie- says he's straight but has always felt weirdly uncomfortable in locker rooms changing with other men. For the record though, every time he imagines what it would be like to be with a guy, he's always the top.

Gemma and Oscar- 🗡🗡🗡 CHILDREN 🗡🗡🗡

Aynsley- has tried to fool around with women before but could never get into it. Not that she's been that into the guys shes been with either. Has probably never had an orgasm ever. And I guess now she never will. 🤭

Sarah Stubbs- bi, and is in a secret poly amorous relationship that she keeps from the neighborhood. Tells Alison about her boyfriend in New York but not about her girlfriend in Torronto or her other boyfriend in Vancouver.

Jason Kellerman- has only been with women EXCEPT for one passionate love affair he had with his former male best friend right after high school. He thought he was the one until one day he just ghosted him and eventually wound up marrying a woman. Jason never really dated after that until he reconnected with Alison and became all clingy trying to get back together with her.

Marci Coates- is an absolute Dom but has never gotten the chance to express it being a black woman in a conservative Christian community. Would probably really enjoy being with a woman but will she ever? Can repress any and all sexual thoughts the moment they appear.

Connie Hendrix- gets so much dick in her retirement community in Florida. GET IT, Connie!!!

Delphine- thought she was straight before meeting Cosima. Tbh still identifies as straight but doesn't care about her label near as much as she loves Cosima.

Scott- definitely into women but has never been in a relationship with one. Has never had his feelings reciprocated. :(

Shay- had a boyfriend as a teenager but she cheated on him with a girl. She ended things with him before he ever found out. She's grown out of her infidelity phase and is ready to settle down but dating is hard. :(

Hell Wizard- is ace because I say so. Has a Tumblr where he reblogs literally every piece of asexual art he sees. Wants to write an entire rap album about being ace.

Jesse Towing- has "helped out a bro" before but really only is attracted to women

Brie- definitely bi. Krystal knows but no one else does because she's still coming to terms with her identity. When she's ready she's going to make a coming out video on her channel with Krystal.

Sammy- probably pan. Also began exploring his gender before he got shot. :( Definitely was in love with Tony who liked him back but saw him as more of an occasionally romantic f*ck buddy than a full on lover.

[mveloc]

Days of Why and How

Chapter 10

“Jesus Christ.”

She stares up at the screen in pure horror, watching the scene unfold before her eyes. Even with the television muted, the flashing images of police cars and crime tape in conjunction with the headline cut through the normal noise and bustle of the bar, captivating her as well as most of the other patrons.

Sixteen dead in violent shootout.

She reaches for the remote stashed safely behind the bar, turning the volume up so she can hear the reporter speak; sixteen dead after a shootout at a local car dealership just hours before—suspected gang activity. She can feel the blood drain from her face despite the slamming in her chest. She can feel her hand holding the remote begin to tremble.

“I don’t wanna hear that shit! Turn it off!”

She’s snapped out of her trance by the booming voice of an older gentleman who angrily slams his pint glass on his table to emphasize his outrage. She obliges, pressing the mute button once again to silence the scene, though she still can’t tear her eyes away from the television.

“Hey.”

The voice is soft—just as soft as the hand that slides across the bar to cover her own. She pulls her eyes away long enough to give the blonde a meek smile.

“It’s going to be okay,” Shay tells her.

Her eyes are warm and reassuring, though Cosima finds herself unable to trust her lover’s words.

“Seriously?”

She makes no attempt to disguise her skepticism and mild annoyance, reclaiming her hand before hastily switching the channel.

Shay sighs.

“Alright,” she concedes. “This is going to get messy.”

“Don’t you mean messier?”

Sixteen people are already dead. She has no doubt Aldous Leekie and Dmitri Davydov are behind it. Knowing those two men, there will be many more bodies to follow before things finally get resolved… if they ever do.

Delphine’s voice rings in her head.

“Things are going to get bloody very soon and if you keep hanging around this girl, you’re going to get caught in the middle.”

She had been too angry to take Delphine’s warning at face value, dismissing it as jealousy.

But now?

“You should start over—you deserve to start over—but you’ll never be able to do that with her and you know it.”

“I met with Delphine the other day,” she blurts out.

She isn’t sure what compels her to tell Shay this, but she’s unable to keep it to herself any longer. Maybe it’s the realization that Delphine hadn’t been out for blood that night—that she had actually been genuine—that she really didn’t know about Leekie after all. If she’s able to accept Delphine’s warning about Dmitri and accept her lack of involvement in Leekie’s plot as the truth, then why is she still unable to accept Delphine’s feelings? What reason does she have to doubt or dismiss them if everything else is true? Why would she lie about that?

“What? Why?”

Shay is just as surprised by her revelation as she is.

“She came to see me after I closed the bar,” Cosima mutters. “She won’t leave me alone.”

Even when Delphine isn’t physically there, she’s still present—looming over every conversation, hanging onto every single one of her thoughts—completely inescapable, for better or worse.

“If she’s really that big of a problem, you can always—”

“She came to warn me about you—about your family,” Cosima tries to explain, her tone serious. “She says I should stay out of it because it’s going to turn into a bloodbath.”

Shay is silent for a moment. She reaches for her tea, taking a sip before speaking again.

“Maybe she’s right.”

“Uh… excuse me?”

Cosima pauses, stunned by her girlfriend’s reaction. She hadn’t expected Shay to give in quite so easily and she isn’t sure if she should be upset or curious.

“What?” Shay shrugs.

“You’re actually agreeing with her?”

“Why wouldn’t I? Just because she’s your ex?”

She considers the question carefully. Is the truth still the truth when you hear it from a liar’s lips? Can it somehow be tainted? As a scientist, she’s always believed the truth to be universal, so why should it matter if it’s coming from Delphine’s mouth or Shay’s? Does the motive behind the words really change what they mean?

“You should stay out of this, Cosima,” Shay continues. “I know my uncle promised you things, but I know how he does business and you’re just not cut out for this line of work.”

Cosima nods silently.

“Yeah.”

She moves through the rest of her shift in a haze, making drinks and sleepwalking through whatever trivial conversation patrons try to make with her. Her thoughts are distant, shuffling through many possible scenarios of how this will play out; she can do nothing and allow things to unfold as they are, heed Delphine’s advice and abandon her current girlfriend in a bid to distance herself from all of the drama, or stick to the original plan she made with Delphine years ago—that she made with Sarah upon being released from prison: take off into the night and never look back. She pays little attention to the petite blonde still perched at the bar, but despite this, Shay still hangs around until Cosima is ready to close up for the night, kicking the last few people out and locking the door.

“You okay?” Shay gently pries. “You’ve been pretty quiet all night.”

“Just thinking.”

“About…?”

When she looks over to Shay again, still sitting at the bar with wide and expectant eyes, the anxiety in her chest bubbles to the surface.

“You wanna go somewhere with me?”

For the second time this evening, impulse has gotten the better of her.

Shay arches a brow.

“Where?”

“I don’t know. It doesn’t matter,” Cosima spills.  “We can just go and never come back.”

It doesn’t take Shay’s bemused expression to tell her she’s acting completely out of character. She can’t be sure if the words are her own, if they’re coming from a place inside of her that’s genuine, or if they’re coming from a place of fear, her invitation stemming from obligation rather than sincerity; in the moment, all she can think about is running as far away as possible and naively hoping her shadow won’t follow.

“You really want to just up and leave with no sort of plan at all? That doesn’t sound like you,” Shay presses.

Her words aren’t meant to be accusatory, but despite her soft tone, Cosima can’t help but feel her girlfriend is purposely looking for some sort of excuse not to go along with her half-baked idea.

“Why do we need a plan? We’ll be together. We’ll figure something out,” she tries.

She’s tired of planning. It’s never worked out for her before. Delphine had had a plan and it had gotten them absolutely nowhere; with all that time spent plotting out their future and how they were going to get there, they could have up and left and simply taken it for themselves. They could have made it work.

But Delphine was never interested in just “making it work.”

She wanted the whole damn thing.

She didn’t want a future—she wanted the future; the one where they got the entire cake and not just a slice… and in that time spent planning on how to get it, there it sat on the table spoiling right in front of them before they had a chance to even taste it.

“Running from your problems isn’t the answer, Cosima.”

She expels an irritated sigh, angrily throwing the rag she’d been using to wipe down the bar to the ground.

“What’s wrong?” Shay asks.

Cosima stops what she’s doing, trying to calm herself. She knows Shay means well, but she needs more than her girlfriend’s good intentions right now; she doesn’t need to be soothed or psychoanalyzed, she doesn’t need more empty promises—she needs action.

“You’re supposed to say yes!” she bursts. “You’re supposed to say we’ll make it work!”

“Is that what I’m supposed to say, or what you want me to say?”

Cosima’s hands—usually so loose and lively—ball into quivering fists when she realizes her reach has exceeded her grasp. She isn’t sure where this desperation has come from—this childish, debilitating need to hold onto anything that seems familiar—anything close enough to keep her from slipping—from being alone. She huffs past Shay in a hurry, muttering beneath her breath as she makes her way into the safety of the backroom.

“I have to close up.”

+ + + + +

The loud, incessant knocking at her door somehow manages to bleed through the wall of noise currently assaulting ears. She pulls her earbuds out just to be certain of it and as soon as she has her confirmation, she places her pen down in her textbook and closes the cover. She hadn’t been expecting any visitors tonight, which can only mean one thing.

“You’re in a good mood,” she remarks as soon as she opens the door to see her girlfriend radiating with excitement.

“Well, I have a very good reason to be,” Delphine answers, quickly crossing the threshold and stepping into Cosima’s modest domain.

“Yeah? And what’s that?”

There’s a brief pause in their banter as Cosima closes the door behind them, her eyes carefully inspecting the beaming blonde. Delphine isn’t normally this… giddy. It isn’t that she dislikes seeing her girlfriend so eager, rather she’s skeptical of it—skeptical of anyone or anything that could generate such a response in the usually calm and level-headed girl.

“I’ve been in touch with someone,” Delphine reveals.

Right away, Cosima can tell she’s withholding.

“What kind of someone?” she cautiously asks.

“Someone who can really help us.”

She furrows her brow, trying to rack her brain for the possible problem Delphine claims to have the solution to.

“What do we need help with? Are we talking couple’s counselling or something, cause honestly—”

Her word vomit ceases the second she feels Delphine press her lips against hers; it’s a gesture that’s meant to silence, but there’s also a tenderness in it that reassures her Delphine isn’t trying to distract or deflect. Her eyes flutter closed and she sighs into the kiss, delighting in the gentle brush of knuckles against her cheeks.

“You’re rambling,” Delphine whispers, lightly nuzzling her face.

“Sorry.”

Delphine reaches for her hand, taking it in her own and giving it a reassuring squeeze.

“He’s going to help us take our careers to the next level.”

Cosima finds herself caught off guard.

“Careers? What careers?”

The last she checked, she was still just a Biology student while Delphine was now living off whatever money she had managed to steal or swindle from the unsuspecting. She can tell by Delphine’s stern glance that the blonde must be referring to her thieving ways.

“Oh. That.”

Delphine’s lips downturn into a frown, her enthusiasm completely stifled by Cosima’s tepid reaction. As soon as Cosima realizes her folly, she sighs heavily.

“Look, if you wanna be a career criminal, that’s great for you. I’m just not really cut out for the whole “life of crime” thing,” she confesses. “And I thought the plan was to drop all our shit and dip to St. Barts?”

Delphine had told her before that there were arrangements that had to be made before their grand adventure, but from the way her girlfriend is speaking now—her voice so full of zest and ambition in regards to this new “opportunity”—she’s getting the very opposite impression.

“I thought we were in this together?”

The crack in her voice is subtle, but Cosima instantly catches it and her heart throbs in her chest. She directs Delphine’s hand towards her mouth, pressing a kiss to her palm.

“Of course we are,” she reiterates. “I’ll follow you wherever you go—you know that.”

Delphine’s lips twitch to form another smile and Cosima tries to match it, though her own smile is much meeker than the blonde’s.

“I’m just saying this isn’t exactly my forte here. I’m just a science geek, in case you haven’t figured that out yet.”

Delphine chuckles at her self-deprecation and Cosima’s lopsided grin finally finds its usual zeal.

“But if you really think this is what we need… then okay.”

She’s not entirely sure that she really understands just what’s happening, but she feels at ease with one look into her lover’s eyes; even if she doesn’t know what’s going on, she’s bolstered by the unwavering devotion staring back at her and somehow, she knows this must be the right call.

“Really?” Delphine counters, her voice hopeful.

“Yeah. I trust you,” Cosima nods slowly. “If you say this is the best way, then—”

“Tres bien! He’s waiting for us.”

The tone immediately shifts while Cosima struggles to keep her bearings.

“Wait, what?”

“He wants to take us to dinner. He’s downstairs waiting.”

Cosima finally processes the blonde’s words, realizing the man she’s been talking about is here at this very moment. She tries her best to hide it, but she can’t help but feel a little imposed upon—violated that Delphine would think to bring him to her home. Her palms grow clammy as she mulls over the idea of having dinner with this mysterious man who seems to have completely captivated her girlfriend.

“Dinner? I-I don’t know—I have a lot of readings to get through…”

“You can finish them later,” Delphine tells her, grabbing Cosima by the arm and leading her towards the door. “Working with Aldous Leekie could be the opportunity of a lifetime.”

Cosima sighs, ultimately relenting as she grabs her keys and jacket. She locks the door behind them and allows Delphine to assist in slipping her jacket on. Once she’s ready to go, she takes a deep breath and allows herself to be led down the hall, into the elevator and back out through the main lobby. As soon as they exit her residence hall, she immediately spots the impressive limousine that’s pulled up and waiting for them.

“You won’t be disappointed,” Delphine whispers into her ear as they approach the vehicle.

“Yeah, I can tell…”

The second Delphine reaches for the door and opens it for her girlfriend to enter, Cosima can’t help but notice that the interior of the limo seems much colder than the outside air as it nips at her cheeks, painting them flushed. She slides all the way over along the leather seat to make room form Delphine to slide in next to her.

Delphine closes the door, entrapping them both.

“You must be Cosima.”