#do i main tag? its only a wip so...

[synthshenanigans]

a WIP of the recent fit that I hope I will finish later & color.

also smaller doodles i miiiiiiight do more with eventually?? v

[sp-growingpains]

I got a little more done today!! I'm so excited for more of Joel! Been thinking about him!

I take such a long time building new OCs. Building his playlist definitely helps. How do you guys usually go about making characters?

[fangsandsoftgrass]

Update on that wifey wip??? I found out Ibis has a symmetry tool so I don't have to manually duplicate and flip each layer so I'm going fucking ham rn ANYWAY IM TRYING REALISM SKETCHES??

[yoonia]

Love is Banned | jay b

— title: Love Is Banned | pairings: Jaebum/Jay B (GOT7) x female reader | genre: pwp (porn with very little plot), post break-up!au, brother’s best friend!au | word count: 10,901 words 

— summary | Heartbroken beyond repair, you escape to your brother’s place hours away from home, desperate to avoid the Valentine’s Day soiree happening around you—only to find yourself trapped in the middle of his love-filled house party. Seeking solitude, you are surprised to find the perfect source of comfort from the last person you had ever expected to meet tonight.

— full fic ratings & warnings | +18 / M for mature; involves swearing, alcohol consumption, drunk sex (with consent), explicit sex, teasing and drunk flirting, sex/dirty talk, soft dom!Jaebum, inexperienced reader, oral sex (female receiving), fingering, clit play, hair pulling (male), restraints/light bondage, light spanking, breast play, nipple play, biting, rough sex, exhibitionism kink, minor pain kink, forced orgasm, multiple orgasms, unprotective sex, creampie, minor aftercare. 

— fic drop date: March 18th, 2025 | read on AO3 | main masterlist | wip | mailbox | feedback box | ko-fi | divider credit

— story note: part of Lost Boys: Threadbare Hearts series | I was supposed to post this on Valentine’s Day, but life kept getting in the way and this took way longer than expected to finish. This fic was roughly edited, but I hope you can still enjoy reading this one. | If you’re interested to be tagged/notified on any of the other stories included in the series, please enter your blog username/url through the taglist form here.

— tracklist: worst behaviour — kwn, kehlani / I can’t wait to get there — the weeknd / slow grind — muni long / slow — wizkid, anais cardot

“You’re not supposed to be here.” 

Those words slip out of you before you can stop yourself.

Because this room was supposed to be empty. At least, that was what you were hoping to find when you came up here. 

Placed far in the hidden corner upstairs of your brother’s home, the small guest room should have been a safe place. It should have been able to keep you far from the racket happening below. 

As far as you know, the room is rarely used—except as a second storage room where your brother would stash his old personal things once he’s no longer using them or when you need to stay over for the night with no disturbance from your brother and his guests. Apart from the two of you, you’ve never known anyone ever using the room. 

That had been the reason why you went upstairs and straight to here once you got the chance to escape. To get away from the damn party that you wanted no part in, expecting some peace and quiet, and a moment to yourself. 

You never expected to find the room—your safe haven—already occupied. 

“I don’t see any rules telling me to stay out of this place,” the man sitting in the darkness responds to you in a mocking tone. You recognise his voice before you get to see his face, as he is almost completely hidden in the shadows with none of the lights turned on, and with his back resting against the foot of the bed where the lights coming through the window can’t reach him. 

Judging from the slight slur in his speech, and the large bottle of liquor sitting on his side with half of its content mostly gone, you can tell that he already has some alcohol running in his system. Possibly from drinking here all alone while everyone else is trashing your brother’s home. 

He lets out a low chuckle and continues, “And, as far as I know, you don’t live here, so I don’t think you’re one to make the rules anyway.”

You cross your arms, going on the defensive—something that your body has been trained to do since you were a teenager facing the group of rowdy boys that your older brother hung out with back in school. “That’s not what I meant.” 

Another low chuckle comes from him before he finally moves, leaning forward until his face is visible under the streaks of dim light filtering from the hallway behind you. Just as expected, your uninvited guest turns out to be Jaebum, one of your brother’s high school best friends who seems to be hanging out around him still. Seeing the recognition on your face, he shows you a grin that no doubt would have been able to make every girl coming in his path blush from head to toe. 

Of course, you would know this to be true. You are a woman, after all, and you used to be one of those girls who were drawn to them. Not just girls, too. Other seniors used to flock around them, following everything they did at school while vying for their attention. With your brother being a part of their group, you would often find them hanging out at your family’s house after school, either in the living room or your brother’s bedroom, something that everyone else had always been so envious of while you could never find the comfort in as they used to invade your safe space.

Just like what he is doing now. 

You should have expected to find at least one of your brother’s friends to be around when you first came and saw the party happening, knowing that they still hang out together even after years have gone by. You just didn���t expect you were going to come across one of them this way. 

“Why are you here anyway? The party’s downstairs,” you curiously ask him once you’ve gotten over your shock. Seeing him now, you cannot help but picture the way you remember him from all those years ago. Years may have passed, but it doesn’t seem like he has changed all that much. He still seems like the same older boy who once made your stomach flutter whenever he was near or when he gave you a bit of attention. 

“I’m not really in the mood to join the party,” Jaebum says, shrugging, “I should be asking you the same thing. Why aren’t you downstairs with your brother? I thought you drove all the way here to join his party.” 

As if.

You narrow your eyes and scoff, murmuring almost to yourself, “I was supposed to come here to avoid all kinds of parties.”

That was the truth, anyway. While you’ve never specifically celebrated Valentine’s Day before, you’re not someone who has any aversion towards it either. Until recently, when you finally have the reason to. 

Dealing with a breakup only days before Valentine’s Day did that to you. It made you become sceptical and bitter, almost allergic to the love fest happening around you. So you decided that you had enough. Knowing how similar your brother is to you when it comes to Valentine’s Day, you drove hours away to his house, thinking that you would be able to spend the night and have the chance to confide in your brother. 

What a surprise it was for you to find the house packed with his friends and colleagues, with most—if not all of them—wearing pink, partying together with your brother who had his new girl of the season clinging to his side. 

How was I supposed to know that he was so smitten and in love with someone he met while we weren’t in contact that he felt like celebrating tonight? 

“Are you staying or going?” Jaebum asks, pointing at the opened door behind you with his chin, with you still standing on the threshold like a lost kitten. “You’re letting all the noise come in. I came here with just as much need to avoid all the ruckus as much as you do.” 

Realising that he is right, and you are at risk of missing your only chance to hide from your brother and all the excitement happening downstairs, you step deeper into the room, closing the door firmly behind you. The moment you are engulfed in the darkness, however, you immediately begin to regret it. 

Shutting the door only means that you are stuck in the same room with him, with no lights—except for the reflecting streetlights you see coming from the window—and possibly no escape. You look over your shoulder, longing for the brief of peacefulness you found in the hallway, instead of whatever awkwardness waiting for you should you choose to say.  

A low chuckle is heard, and you turn to face your brother’s best friend only to see that he isn’t sharing the same uneasiness you are feeling about this odd situation. 

“Now, that’s better. So are you going to join me? You’re not going to just stand there all night until the party’s over, are you?” Jaebum teases you as he leans back against the bed, getting as much comfortable as he can while he sits on the cold floor. “Come sit here with me. I don’t bite,” he says while tapping the empty spot right next to him, his grin widening when he adds, “Unless you ask me to.” 

You are left with no other options. Saying no to his offer would either send you back to the party downstairs or back to the room you’ll be sleeping in tonight, which is the other guest room that is closer to where the party is since your brother had insisted on keeping you close tonight. Just when you try to imagine yourself turning back around to get back to the party instead of staying, a loud cheer echoes through the house. 

Looks like whatever game they did just ended, you wonder, as another cheer breaks through and people start chanting again, telling you that the party is still far from over. Might as well stay here for now rather than regretting it later. 

“Fine,” you say with a sigh, before lifting the bottle of whiskey in your hand—one that you stole from the makeshift bar that your brother had set up in the kitchen. “I’ll share if you share yours.”

Through the dim light, you see the familiar grin spreading on his face again. “Don’t worry, I’m quite generous when it comes to sharing pleasure,” he teases with a wink, causing your cheeks to burn. 

“Whatever,” you respond, trying your best not to get affected by his presence as you walk over to join him. 

As you settle back against the foot of the bed, staying just an arm’s length away from him to stay close yet still distant enough to feel comfortable, your eyes fall on the bottles sitting next to him. The large bottle of high-quality branded liquor has been reduced to nearly half of its content, and there are a couple of small vodka bottles lying close by, with varying levels of contents—either half drunk, emptied, and only two of them still full.   

Was he really thinking about drinking all of this alone? 

Jaebum tilts his head, noticing the way you are eyeing his drinks. “See anything you’re interested in trying?” 

“No, I’m fine,” you hurriedly answer, then take a long drink straight from your bottle to hide your face. You wince at the strong taste of whiskey, but you tough it out and force yourself to speak calmly as if nothing happened, “You look like you’re trying to drink your entire life away.” 

Jaebum follows your gaze and laughs softly. “Is that how it looks?” he hums, picking up a small, nearly finished bottle of vodka and tossing the rest of its content down his throat. He savours the taste with a groan and says, “Hmmm…maybe I am. ” 

He opens his eyes and looks at you with glossy eyes. Combined with the small smile he is giving you, it’s enough to cause those old familiar flutters to rise in your chest and stomach. You pick up your bottle, taking a mouthful of drink out of it that burns your throat, hoping that it would be enough to wash the feeling down, and maybe cool yourself off before it turns into something more. 

Something completely unbidden.  

It takes only a couple of shared drinks before you finally start sharing each other’s stories, spilling all the heartaches and misfortunes that both of you have been dealing with while living away from home. 

It’s quite surreal to think that both you and Jaebum can find something to relate to and share aside from the booze that you’ve smuggled away from the party. You also find it pleasingly surprising that opening up and talking about your problems turns out to be helpful. 

Even more surprising is that it seems equally helpful for both of you. 

For you, who had just been dumped by your college boyfriend merely months after he started his new job in a different city, claiming that being in a long-distance relationship was a risk he wasn’t willing to take when he was building his career. 

For Jaebum, who had to watch his ex-fiancee marrying someone else just over the weekend, only less than a year from the day they broke off the engagement when she first claimed to be having cold feet about the thought of marriage. 

“Well, that sucks,” is all that you can say once he is done sharing his story. 

Hearing your comment, Jaebum lets out an incredulous laugh. “Really? That’s all you’re going to say after I just opened up about the lowest moment of my life?”  

You only laugh and shrug it off. “What more do you want me to say? Are you hoping for some kind of wise advice? From me? Or a pat on the back while I promise you that everything will be okay?” you retort with a snort, and you don’t miss the way Jaebum rolls his eyes on you. 

“I wish I had more to say, but I’m not good with words and I don’t even know you or your ex enough to comment about your life,” you stop with a bitter chuckle, “—or her poor choices.” 

Leaning back, you let out a deep sigh. You cannot help but realise that despite the different circumstances you both find yourselves in, you can't deny how similar your situations truly are. “But I do know how terrible it feels to know that the person you want to be with isn’t thinking the same about you. It just—” You let out another sigh, and add, ”—sucks, to be the one left behind feeling like you’ve been tossed aside.” 

Jaebum says nothing for a moment but clearly appears to be thinking deeply. “I don’t even know your ex,” he says, “but I can judge—hard—and say that he’s a moron.” 

“My brother said the same.” A bitter chuckle slips out of you when you think about your brother’s reaction when you first told him about the bad breakup. You may not have told your brother all the details about your fallen relationship yet, but he was able to comment about what a fool your ex had been to sacrifice a good relationship that he had spent years building with you for a new job that he had barely dedicated a month of his time, much less his entire life to.

But was the relationship you had with him really all that good? Was it enough for you to hold on to those memories as much as you did?

Looking up to the dark ceiling above you, you let your mind wander, as if you can see your entire life written somewhere up there. “I’ve been trying to think of him the same way but it’s hard to do it when I keep remembering all the good things we shared. They might not have been much, but the good memories keep overlapping with all the bad ones just when I try to forget them.”

Jaebum scoffs lightly from your side and nods. “Unfortunately, I can agree on that one.”

To hear the tone in his voice as he says that, and see the haunted look in his eyes when you look at him, an ache pulses in your chest. At the same time, you are surprised to find some comfort just by being here with him, listening to him opening up to you while sharing your own story in a way you haven’t been able to do with anyone else—allowing your lonely, broken souls to meet each other’s match. 

Just as silence forms thickly around you, you find yourself looking far back into a distant past and seeing yourself when you were younger. You can also Jaebum then, existing alongside your brother’s other close friends who seemed hard to reach, much less to talk to. 

Not the same way you’re doing it now, anyway. 

“You know, I always thought you guys were snobs back then. Or maybe I was too intimidated by you. You were all popular in school, and my brother’s warning to stay away from you guys didn’t help much in making me feel less wary about getting close.” 

Jaebum snaps a look at you and barks out a laugh. “Wait—What? What did your brother say about us?” 

You shrug, smiling when you explain with a chuckle, “He just said it wouldn’t be a good idea for me to get close to you guys. Told me to stay away and not fall for any of your charms and get tricked into joining your band of groupies.” 

Once again, Jaebum laughs. “Why the fuck would he say something like that?” 

“Who knows?” you answer with a shrug, feigning innocence as you bite back a smile. 

Because you know exactly why your brother would give you such a warning. 

Compared to your older brother, who was considered one of the most popular kids at school, you were way more inexperienced—both in socialising with people and in relationships. 

Your brother may have managed to keep his dating life private—from you, at least—yet the same couldn’t be said about his close friends. Jaebum and the others were quite notorious when it involved the rotation of girls they were constantly seen dating and hanging out with. Most of the boys were known as players, always spreading their charms to anyone around while breaking hearts left and right. 

“I guess he was just looking out for me,” you finally admit out loud, realising that your brother may have caught your eyes wandering whenever his friends were close. It was hard not to pay attention when you had these attractive seniors hanging around nearby, sometimes even at your home with your brother. “Even if he used to tease me, he’s still my older brother, after all.” 

Jaebum lets out a scoff and laughs. “That’s funny, seeing that he gave us all different kinds of warning when it came to you.” 

“What do you mean? What kind of warning?” 

Turning his head, Jaebum’s grin widens when he sees your reaction. “He told us that you were off limits. That we shouldn’t even think about talking or flirting with you, much less to ask you out.” Your jaw drops, which only makes him laugh. “Some of us suspected that Bambam had this silly crush on you back then, but was quick to back off after your brother warned us to stay away.” 

Surprised to hear this, you cannot help but laugh. It’s not unusual for your brother to meddle with your business. Back then, being a curious teenager, having a meddling older brother felt like a burden. You used to hate it growing up, even if you knew that he only had nothing but good intentions to keep you safe from harm. Looking back at it now as an adult, you only think that the whole situation is hilarious. 

“Can’t believe that you guys were so afraid of my brother to follow his silly rules,” you gently mock him while shaking your head. 

“Hey! That’s not fair! Have you ever seen your brother when he got mad? Like, really mad?” Jaebum defends himself. 

You only laugh in return, knowing exactly what he is talking about. You have seen your older brother’s other side that shows up whenever he is angry, and it’s not often that he may overreact over trivial things that are out of his control. But it doesn’t stop you from finding it funny for a group of bad boys to be so afraid of your brother to not risk breaking his rules. 

Not that you believe that you ever had any chance with these boys in the past. You never even dreamed of having any of them make a move on you, much less pay attention to you. You know exactly what kind of girls they were attracted to, and you never saw yourself as anything remotely on par with any of those girls. 

“I thought you were tough guys who’d love a challenge. At least, if I remember correctly, that was something that some of you used to brag about back then.” 

“You’re one to talk,” Jaebum scoffs. “Have you ever taken a risk, even knowing the consequences and not knowing if it’s going to be worth it?” 

You stop for a moment to think. “Well—” 

You feel hesitant to answer, only because your mind immediately goes to the things you’ve done only to end up having your heart, hope, and dreams broken to pieces as a result. The latest risk you’ve taken, especially, involved giving your heart to a senior you met at college—someone who was smarter, more popular—that you kept questioning if you were living a dream. You’ve even come close to giving up your dream, ready to take a huge risk of moving to another city and starting over just to be with that person.

And look at where it has gotten you now. Abandoned and forgotten, left to pick up all the broken pieces, only because he wasn’t willing to take the same risk to be with you. 

When you still have no answer, Jaebum lets out a scoff. “I knew it. What would a strait-laced girl like you know about taking risks? You should try to live out your life a little, be daring, then you can argue with me about what taking risks truly means.” 

You hear what he is saying, yet your mind is stuck on one simple detail. You’ve never really talked to him so openly before, so you’ve never known how he really sees you as a person. Hearing it coming from him only makes you reflect on yourself the way you never did before. 

Strait-laced? You wonder to yourself. Is that really how people see me?

You must admit that it doesn’t make you feel good to be seen that way. Having good grades throughout school and college and being a nice girl growing up doesn’t make you a prude. 

“Hey, I’ve done stuff!” You turn to face him and start defending yourself. “Unlike you, I’ve done real daring stuff while I was away for college. I climbed a rocky mountain after graduation and built camp on the rocky peaks while there was a storm. I did bungee jumping and paragliding when I went to Bali last summer. I went surfing and—” 

Jaebum raises his hands in surrender mode and laughs, cutting you off before you can continue listing all the extreme things you’ve tried ever since you left home. “Okay, daredevil. So you took risks against nature. That’s great and all, but I’m talking about the other risks. Much like how you’re daring me to cross your brother.” 

You swallow hard, knowing exactly what he is saying. You look away when you start feeling deep regret over your past decisions and heartaches weighing heavy in your chest. “Oh, have I done those as well.” 

Jaebum must have noticed something shifting in your mood, because his gaze softens. So does his voice when he asks, “Was it worth it?” 

You let out a bitter laugh. “Would I be here planning to drink my ass off until I forget my name if it was?” 

A knowing look passes over his gaze. “Your last break up.” He nods, then raises his bottle to knock it against yours. “Maybe you were betting on the wrong things to take a risk on.” 

You can only smile. “And of course, you would know about it.” 

The low chuckle that he gives as a response sounds hollow. “I sure do.” 

Leaning back against the bed again, you take a drink from your bottle—suddenly noticing that you may have gone through more than half of it—and gently ask him, “Tell me then, how do I know what kind of risk I can bet on which I won’t be regretting later on?” 

“You know that’s not how it works,” Jaebum says with a low chuckle, “And I don’t think I’m the right person to teach you something like that.” 

“Right,” you hum to yourself, suddenly realising how silly it is for you to ask him for such advice. 

“Maybe you can start small. Instead of diving directly into something serious like a relationship or making plans to build a future with the first person you meet who gives you attention.”

You raise your eyebrows. “Such as?” 

“Ever been on a one-night stand?” 

You burst out laughing. “What?” 

“No? Never? Yeah, I don’t think so,” he says while shaking his head. While he is right in assuming your lack of experience in that field, it doesn’t stop you from wanting to defend yourself. 

“Hey, wait a min—” 

“How about casual flings? Anything other than your serious relationships? Ever been in one?” 

You open your mouth to answer, only to immediately shut it back up before admitting loudly, “No, not really.” 

He nods. “I figured.” 

Your jaw drops. You look at him with narrowed eyes. “What does that supposed to mean?” 

He tilts his head as he looks at you. At this point, you are beginning to dread the way his grin seems so enticing, and how his low voice is starting to make you feel things inside when he speaks. “It’s just that I can’t see you hooking up with random people just for fun.” 

You bite your lips, hating the fact that he is right. You hate knowing he can read you easily even when he barely knows you aside from being his best friend’s sister. But something must have gone wrong with your head—or perhaps you’ve drunk too much alcohol tonight—because you cannot stop thinking about what he is trying to say. 

“You’re right, it’s not something that I can see myself getting into,” you admit with a small voice, as you look back into your life and wonder how different it would have been for you if you weren’t someone who feels too much, and too deeply, when it comes to relationships. 

“Maybe I should change that,” you finally say, almost to yourself rather than Jaebum. Still, it doesn’t miss Jaebum’s attention that he whips his head towards you.

“Huh? What do you mean?” 

You ignore him, already getting too deep in your thoughts—perhaps something that you shouldn’t be doing when you have alcohol in your system. “I’m saying that maybe you’re right.” 

“Wait, I didn’t say anything,” Jaebum quickly interjects. 

“I never gave casual relationships or hooking up any thought because I’m afraid I’d get emotionally attached, like most girls do,” you turn to him and add, “I’m sure you know this too.” 

Jaebum only raises his eyebrows, knowing that you are referring to his history of hooking up with random girls in the past—along with the series of drama which followed every time he ended a fling—and he just lets you continue. “But maybe that needs to change. That’s a risk that I’ve never taken before, but at least I now know not to get my emotions involved.” 

He laughs, almost in disbelief. “Are you sure about that?” 

“I am,” you stubbornly answer, “because I’ve sworn to keep away from love. Because I’m done with it. From now on, love is completely banned from my life. No more.” 

You take a chug out of your drink and continue to ramble before Jaebum can say anything. “But that doesn’t mean that I can't have fun, right? You said it yourself, that I need to live a little, so that’s what I’m going to do.” 

You can hear Jaebum chuckling from beside you. “Alright, daredevil,” he teasingly says, “And how are you supposed to do that?” You can tell without looking that Jaebum is narrowing his eyes on you when he sounds sceptical. 

So you turn to him, giving him a sweet smile as you explain, “There are people downstairs that I may not see again in the future, right? I could just walk downstairs and pick out someone I’m attracted to and have one wild night before I get home.” 

The more you speak, the more you feel doubtful, but you push it down and take pleasure in the way Jaebum’s eyes keep widening the more he listens. But as the excitement grows on you, so does the pounding in your head. Maybe you’ve had too much to drink already. “Although I might have to wait a minute before going down there to join the crowd of people. I need to wait until my head stops spinning.” 

He lets out a low scoff and shakes his head at you. “You don’t have to go that far.” 

“As a matter of fact, I think—no, I believe I do need to do this,” you cut him off. “I’m done living by the rules and being afraid to take risks that don’t go with my life planning.” Pointing the bottle in your hand his way, you continue to speak, “You were the one who put these ideas in my head, so don’t bother stopping me.” 

Chuckling softly, Jaebum leans closer. “That’s not what I was saying,” he gently says, as if he can read your thoughts and knows that you aren’t exactly sure about what you are saying. 

“What did you mean, then?” 

Jaebum only stares at you with a look that makes you feel like he is trying to strip down every layer you have—not of your clothes, but your truth. 

He softly hums before he finally speaks again. “I’m saying that maybe you don’t have to,” he says, once again with that voice of his that would easily draw people to him. Maybe have women drop their panties for him, even. But there is something different now when he speaks to you slowly, with his glossy eyes looking deeply into yours. 

“I don’t have to do—what?”

“You don’t have to go through the crowds of drunk people downstairs to find someone, is all I’m saying. Aren’t you worried about your brother finding out what you’re up to? He’s still down there leading the party, isn’t he?”

As if the party itself can hear him, a loud cheer erupts from downstairs, answering his question. You can picture your brother, always the life of the party, being in the center of it. You can already imagine him pulling you to join him the moment he sees you returning to the living room. You have lost track of time, and you quickly realise that your brother can notice anytime that you’ve been gone quite a while and that he might start looking for you soon. 

“Then, what should I do?” 

Not a word comes from him while you are starting to doubt anything can really happen tonight. Only seconds ago, you felt like you had found your new self. But you know that this drunken resolution will lead to nothing more once you are sober. Before your mind can get into any further wanderings, Jaebum suddenly shifts closer. You turn to find his face already close to yours, while he has his arm resting behind your back and the other winding around your waist. 

Surprised at the sudden closeness, you make no move to push him away. Your heart makes a stupid, unexpected leap in your chest, which only accelerates when he starts speaking to you in a low, sultry voice, “You could just look somewhere closer instead of going down there. It’s not like you don’t have a willing participant already available nearby.”

You blink, and blink again, your mind taking its sweet time processing his words that everything seems meaningless. Surely, he couldn’t have meant—

“And who might that be?” you ask with a small voice, which only seems to amuse him. 

You watch the grin on his face growing wider before he teases you, “Who else is here? I don’t see anyone else, do you?” 

“Hah,” you let out a sarcastic laugh, still refusing to believe what you are hearing, even if your heart is beginning to react, going out of control with its rapid beating. “Stop joking. Now you’re only mocking me.” 

“I wish I was joking, but I know what I’m asking,” Jaebum says with a smile on his face, his voice lowering when he asks, “Is it really that hard to believe that I’d make such an offer?” 

Before you can process what he is saying, Jaebum leans closer, close enough until you can feel his warm breath falling against your lips. The scent of his cologne, mixed with the strong smell of booze, surrounds you as he keeps you trapped between the foot of the bed and his hard body hovering close so that you can feel his heat. 

“It makes perfect sense, don’t you think?” he asks you, already sounding convincing before he even starts laying out his offer, “We’ve both been scorned by our past experience, and while we’ve learned not to fall for it again, we both still have needs. I still need to forget, which drinking seemed to fail in doing, and you need to discover this new side of you without worrying about getting attached. Maybe I can teach you a thing or two about it since I know just exactly how to do it. And you know who I am, so you’d know how to find me and kick my butt off in case you regret it in the morning.” 

We’re still not friends, and not close enough for that level of trust, is what you want to say to him. 

But the words refuse to leave your lips, and your mind is getting hazy from how close he is getting. His nose brushes against yours, and your heart once again makes a giant leap which is so hard to ignore. He tilts his head, his lips coming closer to yours for a little tease, making your lips tingle. 

“Well? Come on, think about it,” he murmurs, with his lips hovering close but not enough to touch. Yet, between your hazy mind and the alarm bells ringing inside your head—warning you about your brother and his rules, about how much of a bad idea this is—you can feel yourself drawn into it. Drawn into him. 

“I think—” you barely manage to say, “This is going to be a bad idea.” You lift your gaze to look into his eyes and immediately feel like you are drowning in the depth of his gaze. 

Jaebum bites his lips while lowering his gaze. “What if I can change your mind?” 

“What are you planning—oh!” 

Whatever it was that you wanted to say dies on your tongue when Jaebum presses his lips on yours. He tenderly moulds his lips against yours, instead of devouring them in a heated kiss. Yet it’s still enough to steal words from your mouth. 

I must be going crazy, is the last thing that comes across your mind before you wrap your arms around his neck and return the kiss, allowing yourself to melt into his heat. You can feel him smiling into the kiss, pleased to know that he has practically won you over as you press your lips harder against his. 

As he deepens the kiss, the world around you seems like it’s spinning. It takes a moment before you realise that your whole body is tilting backwards, pushed under his weight as he gently lowers you back on the floor. The dust-covered carpet cushions your weight as you rest on your back. While you are trying to get comfortable, your eyes flutter open to see him slowly crawling over you. 

A soft moan slips out of you as he reclaims your mouth again. His tongue reaches inside, as if demanding you to pay attention to him instead of letting your mind wander and let it get filled with doubt. He runs his hands down your waist, his chest pressing you down against the hard floor, and then he stops when you protest with a whimper when your back starts rubbing against the rough carpet beneath you. 

“Hmmm, this won’t do,” he murmurs against your lips, his eyes searching your face to find any sign of discomfort. With a hum, he glances over to the bed and pushes himself up. 

The world around you starts spinning once again as Jaebum scoops you up from the floor and lifts you in his arms. You barely have the chance to hold on when he moves towards the bed and gently lays you down on the mattress. The sheets feel cold beneath you, yet he quickly makes it up with his warmth when he joins you. 

The sight of him hovering above you, with his eyes glowing in the dark, full of dark intent, feels like a part of a fever dream. Everything that he said he wanted to do to you, you can see it in his gaze. It’s enough to leave you breathless, to make you feel hot inside. To feel like you are wanted. 

A grin forms on his face as he asks, “Now, where were we?” 

Once again, the crippling doubt inside you holds you back, when you can easily pull him down to you and take over. “You were trying to convince me,” you answer with a whisper, when you wish to feel his kiss again so he can stop you from thinking so hard.

“Did I do a good job, then?” 

You take a deep breath. “I—” you try to answer, but the moment you see the look he is giving you, everything inside you, including your sane mind, simply stops working. 

Outside, coming all the way from downstairs, the music is still blaring loudly the later it gets in the night. The sound of people dancing, chatting, and cheering over some sort of drinking game can be heard through the thick walls. 

But here, the air is getting thick with tension, and it’s hard to focus on anything else when you are pressed down against the hard mattress beneath you, and you have your brother’s best friend hovering on top of you with a sick, teasing grin on his face. 

And oh, how much you struggle to keep your eyes away from those enticing lips, knowing how good they feel when they are pressed against yours. 

All you have to do is lean closer or pull him down to you, and you can have that kiss once again. 

“So? What do you say?” he asks again while his gaze moves to your lips, lingering for a few seconds too long as he catches you licking your lips, tasting the ghost of his kiss. “It’s a one-time offer, and time is ticking. How much longer do you think before your brother comes up here and catches us together?” 

You cannot help but grin at the mention of your brother. “Aren’t you afraid that he might just do that and break your nose again like he did years ago?” you ask, referring to the infamous incident in the past when they had a massive fight over a silly girl who turned out to be playing these boys around—the perfect reverse play of what they used to do to the girls at school who worshipped the ground they walked on.

Jaebum only laughs it off, and your heart skips a beat when you realise how much his voice has changed over the years. And how much you still love hearing it the same way you did then. 

“I think it’ll be worth the risk. As long as you’re in.” 

Worth the risk. 

Yeah, there’s nothing stopping your heart from trying to break free from your chest now that you hear such words. You shouldn’t believe it. But you want to believe it. You want to believe that he thinks you are worth risking your brother’s wrath. 

“Well? Are you in? Or are you going to walk out that door and forget everything we just talked about?” 

You bite your lip as you consider your options. His offer is tempting, but are you brave enough to take that risk? 

One night. No attachment. No promises. And you get to leave this place free of your pent-up frustrations and needs. Maybe dare yourself to feel some pleasure from the one you are forbidden to touch.

Even if you might have to ignore the familiar flutters in your chest rising the more you look at him—the same way it used to happen all those years ago whenever you saw him when he was hanging out with your older brother. 

“Not a chance,” you answer him with a grin, before you lift your legs and wrap them around his waist, your arms coming around his neck as you pull him down towards you. “Game on.”  

Wearing a victorious smile on his face, Jaebum claims your mouth in a kiss, and your entire body softens. He pushes his tongue to deepen the kiss, taking possession of every last bit of doubt you might still have left until there is nothing more but lust and passion and all you can feel is the need you want him to fulfil. 

Clutching the back of his shirt, you begin to pull it upward, and he slips down to let you strip him off of it before he does the same with your top. Tossing your blouse away, Jaebum begins crawling down, his lips tracing the length of your neck on his way down, brushing gently on your breasts as he peels your lacy bra off of your skin. Then he continues making his way down, his hands grabbing hold of the waistband of your pants before tucking them down your legs, taking your flimsy panties along with it. 

Cold breeze washes over your skin once you are left bare and naked on the bed, but it’s quickly replaced by the heat of his gaze perusing you with a look of hunger written on his face. He runs his hands down your waist, to your hips, sliding them under your thighs as he bends down to trace your skin with his kisses. You feel his mouth moving close to your center, causing your heartbeat to pick up its pace. 

He doesn’t waste his time teasing you. Tightening his grip on your thighs, he smoothly dives between your legs, burying his face at the center of your heat. 

A moan slips through your lips when you feel his tongue slipping through your wet folds. You feel his mouth wrapping itself around your clit and giving it a suck, causing your back to arch and a louder moan comes rumbling out of you when a delectable rush comes flowing through your body. Your hand clumsily land on his head, fingers winding through the strands of his hair as you search for something to hold on to while you rock your hips against his lips. 

You hear him chuckling softly and moaning against your heat, before he begins to move his tongue and mouth more aggressively, alternating between pushing his tongue into your warmth and licking your arousal to suckling on your throbbing clit. His actions drive you over to the edge, your orgasm tearing your body as you continue to rock against his face, following the rhythm of your pulse. 

It comes too quickly, stemmed from your pent-up frustrations and nerves, yet neither of you has yet to have enough. Finger clenching tightly on the strands of his hair, you push his face to your quivering center, wordlessly telling him not to stop. With a hum, Jaebum continues—lapping, licking, and sucking—and adds his fingers into the mix, pushing them deeply through your pulsing walls and causing another dynamic orgasm to tear through your body. 

“Jaebum…fuck!” you curse between your cries of pleasure, unable to hold your voice down. 

Yet he makes no sign of stopping. The sounds you are making only seem to be urging him on, as he continues working his mouth and fingers on your heat. 

It isn’t until moments later, as the spasms coming out of your center begin to subside, that Jaebum finally lets you go. With one last kiss on your soaking folds, he pulls away and shifts back until he reaches the foot of the bed. 

As he rises on his feet, you open your eyes to look at him, marvelling at the sight of him—his chest glistening with a thin sheen of sweat, his messy hair that comes from the work of your fingers, and his slick lips, still wet from your release. 

“I wish I could take a picture of you right now,” he murmurs while he starts working on his belt and pants, his eyes never wavering from you as he takes everything off. 

Keeping your gaze on him, you follow every movement as the final pieces of clothing leave his skin. Your breath catches at the sight of his thick shaft bobbing out of its restraint. You can almost see it twitching and pulsing as Jaebum continues to look at you, his gaze runs from the tip of your toes to your hair, going back and forth as he takes his time to get his fill of the image of you lying vulnerable on the cold bed. 

This is happening, you tell yourself as you inhale a deep breath. You cannot believe that you are seconds away from actually fucking your brother’s best friend. It feels hot and naughty—risky—but the thought itself is so damn enticing that your body is humming with new desire. 

Jaebum licks his lips and wraps his hand around his rigid cock. His gaze remains on you as he slowly strokes himself, getting himself harder. The sight of him touching himself while watching you does wild things to your mind. It feels exhilarating, and you don’t even question if this sensation has anything to do with the drink you had earlier, knowing that this is all because of him. 

Feeling brazen under his gaze, you move your hands to trace your skin, going up until you reach your bare breasts. Gently, you cup the soft flesh with your palms and begin kneading, and embrace the waves of heat rolling through your body. The sensation gets stronger when you watch him licking his lips, his hand moving slightly faster, as if watching you has put him in a trance. 

“Are you going to just stand there and watch? Or am I going to have to do this alone?” you tease him with a low voice that sounds completely unfamiliar to your own ears, while slowly folding your legs up, spreading them open to show him where you want him to be. 

A groan slips out of his lips as he watches you, enthralled, and Jaebum hastily climbs the bed, moving swiftly to cover your body with his. “I already promised that I’ll be the one showing you everything,” he grumbles as he covers your wrists with his hands and gently pulls them away from your chest. Holding your wrists together in one hand, he brings them over your head and keeps them there. 

“Hold still,” he whispers, as if restraining you wouldn’t be enough to keep you from moving. “And try to keep your voice down this time. We don’t know if anyone is going to find their way up here.” 

He covers your mouth with his and your body relaxes against his as you lean into the kiss. He presses you down into the bed under his weight and starts running his free hand down your body. You feel his touch on your breast, already sensitive after your teasing touch, and your chest arches into his palm. 

Jaebum pinches your nipples, and then he bends down, his mouth capturing one peak after another, tongue swirling around the tips until they become hard and raw. 

“Ah, fuck—” you curse with a gasp when each brush of mouth and finger sends delicate sparks that travel all the way down to your core. Everything inside you throbs—not of pain, but pleasure—and you can no longer hold back the cries coming out of your lips when Jaebum latches on one nipple and gives a light bite. 

Hearing your voice, Jaebum releases his mouth from your throbbing nub with a pop and pulls back just enough for you to look at his face. Under the shadows of the limited lights filtering through the windows, his gaze feels intimidating, yet enthralling at the same time. The way he looks at you makes you feel desirable that it unleashes everything inside you that you never knew existed.

“I told you to keep your voice down,” he complains with a deep voice that sounds almost like a growl. “Anyone can hear you if they get anywhere close, and it won’t be long for your brother to find out what we’re doing.” 

“I thought you were willing to risk it?” you tease him, which only makes his eyes grow darker. 

“Are you challenging me?” he asks you with a low voice. It stirs the insides of your belly, yet you ignore it for the moment and shrug playfully. 

“What if I am?” 

A low chuckle rumbles from him. There is a dark glint in his eyes as he gently pulls your thigh up, folding your leg until your hips are slightly lifted from the bed. A wicked smile spreads on his face as he leans down, pressing his lips on the corner of your lips and murmurs, “Naughty girl.” 

Anticipating a kiss, you never expect to feel pain flashing from the side of your bare bottom, inflicted by none other than his wandering palm. 

“Hey!” 

Opening your eyes widely, you see him grinning with pride. He tightens his hold on your wrists to keep you still as you wriggle beneath him while he runs his other hand around the burn from his unwarranted smacking.

“What? Don’t naughty girls deserve to be punished and spanked?” 

Something sparks inside you. While you are more inexperienced compared to him, you have learned about a variety of sex plays that one could enjoy in bed to know what he is doing. “Oh, so you like that kind of game, huh?” 

Jeabum bites your bottom lip. “It’s not a game, baby. I like to be in control,” he murmurs, then lifts his head to look into your eyes to ask, “Are you afraid of me? Will that scare you?” 

Nibbling your lips, you consider his words. You’ve never known that pain could be so pleasing. Your skin still burns after the impact of his light spanking, yet it seems to amplify the pleasure pulsing right inside your core when the pain is slowly subsiding under his incessant touch. 

“No,” you answer with a whimper, “Not at all.” You stop fighting his restraint and instead use it as leverage as you push your hips upward, taunting him, “Come on, show me how you’re going to punish me for being bad.” 

“Fuck,” he chuckles nervously, stunned, but is quick to recover as he folds your legs up and smacks the other side of your butt in response. A sharp gasp leaves your lips when you feel the sting, which turns into a soft sigh as he gently rubs the pain away, giving you a brief moment of respite before landing another smack near the tender skin that he first touched. 

Jaebum repeats the light smacking a couple of more times, going back and forth from one side to another, always followed by gentle touches to soothe the pain away. By the time he is done, the pain no longer stings so badly. The throbbing on your skin has travelled deep into your center, replacing every bit of pain with pleasure so raw that is barely comprehensible to your mind.

“Oh, you liked it, didn’t you?” Jaebum teases you with a low whisper, chuckling softly at the way you are rocking your hips against his palm. Letting go of your hand, he holds down your hips and slips his fingers between your folds, humming softly as he is met with your slick arousal. 

“Look at you, getting hot and wet after a bit of spanking. I never expected that you would have this wanton side hidden under your good girl facade,” he keeps muttering as he continues pushing his fingers inside your heat, moving them between your throbbing walls at a languid pace while you begin rocking back into his fingers. “I kind of like this side of you.” 

You can barely hear his voice at this point. Your mind is blinded by the sensations you are feeling. Incoherent noises keep coming out of your lips, and your body is moving on its own, chasing for every bit of pleasure you can get from his touch. 

Jaebum bends down, pressing his lips on the tip of your breasts. “Fuck, I want to be inside you so bad, baby,” he mutters breathlessly between giving your nipples teasing kisses. The touch of his lips feels distracting, along with the steady thrusts of his fingers inside your heat as pleasure rocks through your body, making it hard for you to focus on his words. Yet you still don’t miss what he is trying to say.

Rocking your hips against his, you look up through your bleary eyes and whisper, “Yes, please. I need you…inside me…now.” 

You are not one to beg for anything. Ever. Nothing like this. But the need to feel him is clawing at your chest. You want him. Your body needs him. And there is nothing that can stop you from begging him to let you have him. 

Jaebum says nothing, but his actions are enough to answer your plea. Pushing his fingers deeper, he presses his thumb against your clit, rubbing the flesh just enough to send your body spiralling towards the edge. 

Trying your best to hold back your cries, you bite your lip and bury your fingers on his shoulders. But Jaebum isn’t one to let you go off easily. With his mouth still working around your breast, he gives your nipple a lick, before capturing the hardened nub between his mouth. You feel him humming against your skin, right around your puckered flesh, before a searing pain sparks across your body when he bites down. 

“Ah…fuck. Jaebum!” 

Screaming out his name, you almost cry as your orgasm tears right through your body. While it’s not yet enough to satiate your need, it is still enough to make you feel like you are floating up high. Every cell in your body sings, all coming alive under his touch, and the heat unfolding in your core spreads like wildfire. 

Before you can recover, Jaebum has already made his move. Looking pleased with himself, a smile spreads on Jaebum’s face as he pulls back, dragging his fingers carefully out of your pulsing heat, leaving behind the rapid throbbing inside you to fill the void he left behind. 

Without wasting any more time, he rises on the bed and pulls your ankles up to his shoulders, keeping your hips elevated. Then he presses forward and drives his full length into your quivering core with one firm thrust. You cry out loudly at the force of his thrust. You may have gotten slick and wet enough for him to slide in easily, but your pussy is still sensitive after the multiple orgasms that the intrusion drives a delicious pain that rocks your entire body. 

Your back arches off the bed, and he is quickly drawn towards your full breasts as they once again rise before his eyes. His hand that isn’t holding your thigh up reaches down to give your soft flesh a firm hold.

He gives your breast a gentle knead, taking away your attention from the tightness down below as he begins to fuck you hard with deep rhythmic thrusts, his hard shaft plundering your body. 

“Oh…oh, God!” you keep sputtering random words when you feel the pleasure rising inside you like a tidal wave.

He continues driving into you, getting deeper with each thrust and sending you almost slipping on the bed. His hands move down, gripping your hips to pull you back to him before you are pushed all the way back to the end of the bed. Driving you back against him allows him to get deeper. You feel the force knocking the air out of your chest, while waves of pleasure keep rolling through your body with each thrust, each rock of his hips, and you find yourself already hanging over the edge of your climax. 

You reach up, grasping a hold of his strong arms as you join the rhythm of his thrusts, rocking and pushing against him at the same pace, until you begin to feel the ripples of your climax rising, uncoiling, ready to devour you as you quickly reach for the edge. 

Opening his eyes, Jaebum drops one of your legs, keeping hold of the other just to keep you spread open for him as he bends forward, enveloping your body with his. His mouth finds yours then, kissing you deeply to swallow the sounds of your moans. Then his lips begin to move away, going down your chin, crawling its way to the column of your throat, before going up again to capture your earlobe. 

“I’ve always wanted to fuck you for so long,” he whispers to your ear, too soft of a voice for such dirty words that it makes your head spin hearing it coming from him. Then he thrusts forward, pressing deeper before he begins rocking again, hard and fast, he continues pumping his thick cock into the depth of your warmth. “Fuck, you feel so damn good!” 

You give in to the rising pleasure, your head falling back into the pillows while your chest once again rises and arches with how intense it feels. Your mind is filled with bliss, that you can barely focus on his words, or anything else that is happening around you. 

The party below seems so far away, even if you can still hear the beat of the music vibrating through the floor and walls. But none of it matters now. What matters to you right now is him; the pace of his thrusts that continue relentlessly without fail, moving faster and harder, and the way he is working your body with his expert hands. 

The grip that he has on your hips feels unyielding, anchoring you to him while denying you escape as he chases for his climax. You can feel his fingers pressing harder into your skin, nails scrapping on your soft flesh, no doubt leaving some marks and indents that you may find much later on once everything is over. 

“Are you close?” he breathlessly asks while moaning, showing you signs of his coming release. 

The answer coming out of your mouth sounds like a sharp cry, “Mmmh—yes!” 

Jaebum captures your chin and turns your face to look at him. “Keep your eyes on the door. You’ve been loud for a while now, and I know you didn’t lock the door when you came in,” he gently says, grinning as realisation dawns on you. He’s right. That was quite a risk to take for you to enter the room without locking and going further with this whole thing without checking things over. Fear grips at your chest, though it only intensifies the pulsing happening down below, right here he is burying his cock into. 

“What would your brother think if he sees you like this, writhing like a pure, little nymph and taking my hard cock deep inside your pussy?” Jaebum questions you with a voice so low it almost sounds like a growl. 

You have no idea which triggers the most delightful, yet the most carnal pleasure to roll through your body; the deep voice which vibrates from his chest, his dirty words that are planting these wicked images in your mind, the steady thrusts of his cock inside your heat, or the visual image of getting caught fucking your brother’s best friend, in your brother’s house, while people are partying downstairs and most possibly hanging out in the other rooms present on this floor.

“Fuck, you’re tightening around me. Thinking about getting caught turns you on, huh?” Jaebum says with a furious grunt, yet without missing a single thrust as he rocks his body against yours. He pushes deep and shudders, just as your walls are clenching tight around him. 

“Oh, yeah. That’s it, baby.” 

He keeps muttering the same words over and over again, coming together with his incessant thrusts. You watch as his eyebrows crease, as the veins in his neck are straining, his breathing laboured heavily, and the sounds he keeps making are mixed with a series of moans. You can feel the telltale signs of his release pulsing inside your depth, going in the same rhythm as yours as it begins to rapidly build up inside you. 

Getting lost in the pleasure, Jaebum digs his fingers into your hips and thighs as he continues to savagely pound into you. When once again his body shudders, your body pleasantly trembles at the same time. 

“Look at me, baby,” his strained voice growls, demanding your attention. And you simply give it to him, wanting to look at the one who is giving you this carnal pleasure right in the eyes just to convince yourself that this is real. 

Once your eyes are on him, your body is giving in to the pleasure, Jaebum moves his hand between your rocking bodies. You feel a slight pressure on your throbbing clit as his thumb finds your sensitive bud, and you can feel your muscles clamping around his cock, sucking around his girth as he slides in and out of you at a rapid pace. 

“Come for me, baby,” he growls, just in time you feel the coil in your stomach snapping, then he gives your clit a sharp flick while he buries himself deep inside you. “Come.” 

Under his command, you tip over the edge, shattering into a million pieces that shoot up through you like a fountain. Your chest feels tight when you scream out your climax, yet neither of you cares to stop it as he joins you with his deep moans. Jaebum continues giving you a couple of more thrusts, until you feel him shuddering at the same time your whole body quakes with your final release, and he joins you with a loud shout coming out of his lips, the warmth of his cum filling your tight walls that it almost sends you to another orgasm. 

You almost lose your sense of balance, when you can barely recognise between left and right, top to bottom, until you feel your body—now all hot and covered with sweat—pressing against the sheets beneath you, all messed up under your weight and the rigorous fucking, and the slickness of his cum seeping out of your throbbing center. 

When you feel him lowering your trembling leg down to the mattress, you slowly open your eyes, finding Jaebum bringing one of your hands to his lips. He kisses your wrist, before stepping away to grab his discarded shirt to start cleaning all the mess pooling on the apex of your thighs. 

“Do you think we were too loud?” you whisper to him once he is done and joins you back on the bed, lying right beside you with a content sigh. 

The sounds from the party below have started to grow distant, a sign that the party is slowly winding down, but not completely ending just yet. 

While the rest of the house is still filled with the remaining noises from the party, the room is filled with the silence that falls heavy once all the delirium comes to a halt. 

As you lie there on the bed, with the shards of your climax still continuing to course through your limbs while you are struggling to control your breath, you feel your body warming up with contentment and the presence of Jaebum’s body heat as he pulls you close to his chest. 

Meanwhile, your mind seems to have sobered up, allowing you to process everything that had just happened. 

As if he can feel the gears in your brain working hard, Jaebum shifts on the bed, and once again his face comes into view. 

“Want to get out of here? My new place is within walking distance from here. Maybe we can continue where we left off and finish the rest of the alcohol we still have before your brother catches us with the stolen goods.”

His offer seems genuine. It also provides a chance to escape the possibility of having to deal with reality, and everything else that involves your brother and facing the consequences of your actions. And you do still have some bottles to finish. 

“I like that idea.” 

Your body is still strained and sore, yet it doesn’t take long for both of you to get dressed and pack up all of the remaining bottles to take with you in your escape. 

You can barely remember how you manage to slip away from the house unnoticed, even with the party still lingering and your brother’s guests lounging tiredly everywhere you look, or how you are able to reach Jaebum’s new apartment on your wobbly legs. 

Everything blurs as you continue your business with Jaebum at his place for the rest of the night until morning comes, only that none of it involves finishing the rest of the alcohol that you’ve managed to snatch away from your brother’s party, but has everything to do with the lessons that Jaebum had promised you about embracing pleasure. And you make no effort to put a stop to it when Jaebum continues giving you pleasure until the next day comes, continuing while your minds are completely sober. 

Seems like you actually are terrible with all this one-night stand business, after all. 

— ©Yoonia, all rights reserved. reposting/modifying of any kind, translations, or unsanctioned adaptations of any piece of writing posted on this blog are NOT allowed.

[thewickwheat]

I'm going to a post full details under the cut, but a short run down:

I've sort of vaguely mentioned this here and there but this year I'm forcing myself to go on a long hiatus. Its been something in the plans for years now, but I can't put it off any longer because 2024 was the worst wrist pain I've dealt with and I don't want to risk permanently damaging myself if I haven't already.

If you're waiting on a comm, don't worry! My hiatus won't officially start until I've finished them all up (estimating April-May to finish up everything), so just bare with me!

Character Sheet comms are staying open

If you're able and willing to support me during this break, please check out my shops or my Patreon!

Ko-Fi - Physical/Digital Merch + Donations

INPRNT - Physical Prints

Patreon - Process Videos and WiPs

Full details and extra info under the cut

So this has been a long time coming but this year I’ll be taking a long hiatus. This is something I’ve wanted to do for years but I can’t put it off any longer due to how bad my wrist pain was in 2024. I’m feeling incredibly burnt out as well and my turn around times growing longer and longer is a very clear sign of it. It also means I’ve had a growing anxiety that if I continue at this pace I will end up doing permanent damage to my body, if I haven’t already. Creating art is the one thing I know I want to do for the rest of my life, be that drawing for myself or helping other people see their visions come to life, and I don’t want to put that at risk.  

So I can’t put my hiatus off any longer and I’m making this year the start. If you are still waiting on a commission from me, don’t worry! I am going to keep working on them and my official hiatus time won’t start until everything has been finished up. I’m estimating April to May to get everything cleared off the table since I’m going to work at a steady pace. Character sheet commissions are going to remain open, they are not in high demand and I can put them in a queue and so should anyone have interest in one during my hiatus, it could be something I pick up when I need the extra cash. However all other types of commissions are going to be unavailable for the foreseeable future. 

I am aiming for a 6 month long hiatus at the least. If I can go longer I will aim for a full year break. Freelance and commission work has been my main source of income for over 10 years now, so during this time I may also look into getting a part time job so I don't have to rely so heavily on art, which will also affect how much I’ll be able to take on in the future. I’m not quitting art during this hiatus, I do want to keep drawing and creating! But I will be working at a slower pace, creating for myself, experimenting and trying other projects. I also have more merch ideas on the list to work on! I’ve got some plush designs I want to have made,namely a new Zenos plush that will have doll fiber hair that can be brushed and styled.

I will also design more tag style keychains with more XIV characters (like the Scions and other major NPCs), since people have really liked those a lot! I’ll also plan out some other ideas and maybe design some original design plushies or other merch. We’ll see!

If anyone enjoys my work and wants to help support me during my hiatus, please check out my available merch. I have prints on INPRNT, and a variety of items on Ko-Fi (limited prints, artbooks both physical and digital, keychains, stickers, etc.), I also have a patreon where I post process videos of illustrations. You can also drop donations of my Ko-Fi. I will be adding a goal that I’ll set at a high amount I don't expect to reach, just because I personally want a visual of donations or purchases during my break. Even small donations would mean a lot. If only 10% of my followers on twitter or tumblr bought a single Ko-Fi donation, it would be a substantial amount of money. I say this not to guilt folks into donating, but to point out small donations can still have a lot of power. And so I appreciate any support at all!

Thank you so much if you read this entire message. It means a lot to me and I hope a good long break means when I’m  able to get back to commission and freelance I’ll approach them with much more vigor and skill!

[jensthwa]

mountebank chem pt. four teaser+moodboard (JYH x reader).

this mini series is part of the love's an uncharted path universe ★.

status: wip (i still have a bit to go, sorry ya'll). chapter title: i love you, i'm sorry. word count (so far, more to go): 15.8k teaser word count: 1.2k posted: 01/26/2025 taglist: @kyunlov, @tinyelfperson, @ultrapinkvoidbouquet, @kyeomooniee, @fairylover68, @sushiinmidnight, @qveenbunni, @potatomountain, @svintsandghosts, @blue5ummer, @fancypeacepersona, @hyukssunflower, @i-love-ateez, @alsomimi, @e3ellie, @st3ft0n3s, @hotteokkay

notes: hey everyone... how ya'll doing... OKAY, SO. I've been writing like crazy these past couple of days and I explained it in a post before but I just want to let everyone know that I'm a little busy with life, finding a remote stable job (or a job at all at this point) is a little hard, especially when the only thing you do succesfully is being a writer lmao. so I've been focusing on that instead of this but!!! I'm almost done with this chapter. I do think we're getting a chapter five, a shorter one, just to kind of explain how everything goes after the end of chapter four and that's going to be cooking as soon as this chapter goes live! ANYWAY. I wanted to give you all a little teaser that covers a little of what's to come in this one. it's my favorite one so far, too, so I'm really looking forward to you reading it!

remember that I have a permanent taglist form! that way, i can tag you in all my future works <3 also, if you'e reading this on the tags, here's my main masterlist and the mbc!masterlist if you want to catch up!

thank you all for being so patient and into the teaser we go.

Making a mental list to organize and prioritize everything you need to do, you barely register footsteps echoing in the long hall. You should’ve, because it’s lunchtime and there’s no one on the floor, but you don’t. 

And so when the person you least want to see comes through the door and lets out a heavy sigh, you turn to him like he grew a second nose over the course of the twenty minutes you last saw each other. 

“I hate it here, I truly do.” 

It almost makes you want to laugh, but you remain stoic as you move through the office. You take a few boxes and you put them down on the floor until there’s some light leaking through the window and illuminating the space enough for it not to give you a headache as you work. 

Sitting on your brother's chair, barely sparing him another glance before turning on the desk computer and pulling up an empty document. You click and tap a few meaningless things: You pick the font, you mess with the font size for a second before setting it back to its default. Anything to help you look busy and not like your heart is going a million miles per second. 

“Can I help you with anything, Yunho?” 

Blurry, in the background, you can see him look around the office, probably taking the mess in. He moves too, walks until his expensive shoes are tip to tip  with a literal mannequin resting against the wall. 

You stop paying attention as you write the date and the proposal title. Something simple, something that both your father and the CEO of the dumb not-approved-by-you company that has you in this predicament can understand. You hate to say that you assume they’re not very smart if they put out such a dated and non profitable idea for their company. 

Still, you try to address Yunho like nothing’s bothering you and like you’re not nervous you two are in a room alone after everything that went down. 

“You can ask Seonghwa what that means,” you start, sighing like his friend and your brother are hopeless. Because maybe that’s what they are. “They’re not running any ideas by me even though I’m the one that spends the most time in this office, so.” 

“Hm,” he starts and you can hear him walking around, but your focus is now on the first few words of the proposal. You realize there’s really nothing you can start before speaking with marketing and so you open the notes app, to have a list of ideas to run through them at least. “Thought you worked from home.” 

“I do. I have an office three floors down, too.” It’s easy sharing information with him now, especially if it means there’s something to talk about that’s not… Well, the kiss. “I hate it, it’s in a corner and people can see into it. It’s easier to work here.” 

“And Soohyun hyung doesn’t mind?”

“Considering he’s never here, I doubt it.” 

“Cool, cool.” 

There’s something in his tone that makes you want to look up, lump in your throat growing in size enough for you to cough it away. You don’t look up, you can’t look up even if you’ve misspelled the word rebrand like four times already. 

But then the light you managed to cast onto the space disappears completely. You feel something besides you, the soft material of an expensive suit blazer grazing your arm and cheek. You see veiny, masculine hands secure themselves around the arms of the chair before he’s turning you to face him. 

You gulp. 

He’s leaning down close, closer than he should be, closer than what he’s allowed to be considering anyone can walk in on you. You’re flushing, you can feel the redness creep up your neck and heating your ears and face before you gather the courage of raising a questioning brow. Yunho stays silent, his eyes scanning your face and briefly landing on your lips before returning your stare. 

“Can I help you with anything, Yunho?” You ask him again, quieter this time, voice trembling a little. 

“Princess,” he starts, the corner of his lip raising just a little, like it’s funny he has to say what he’s about to say, “are you ghosting me?” 

Shit. 

“Why would you— Why would I—,” a nervous chuckle abandons you and then you huff, trying to seem offended at his accusation, “W-what do you mean by that?” 

Leaning into your space a tiny bit more, he repeats “Are you ghosting me?” 

Creasing your brow, you straighten in the chair but do nothing to pull him away “No.”

“Then what about the ten messages I sent you and you left on delivered?” 

Faking a surprised gasp, you move to take your phone out of the pocket of your jacket and unlock it to swipe through your messages “You did? Oh, my God, I’ve been soooo busy.” 

“You’re shit at lying to me.” 

“I’m not lying to you—” 

“Are you okay?” 

Your eyes snap from the phone to his face, genuine annoyance creasing your eyebrows this time. 

“You don’t have to ask me that everytime you see me, Jeong.” 

“But are you?” He asks as you finally find his chat and open the messages you dreaded to see the entire time that passed. There’s a few of them practically begging you to speak to him, one apologizing for the kiss and the other ones you don’t even see because Yunho is taking the phone from your hand and placing it on the desk next to you. “I mean, what happened didn’t trigger anyth—” 

You hate he’s this considerate with you, even after you clearly walked out of the situation with a poorly formulated excuse.

“What happened was a mistake.” 

Yunho physically deflates and lets the chair go, the tension on your shoulders lifting a little now that he’s not as close. 

“What?” 

“It was a mistake, we shouldn’t have done that. We’re professionally obligated to work together, fake all of this together, so it shouldn’t…” You pause and consider for a bit before doing something you never do: take the blame “I shouldn’t have. I apologize.” 

Letting out a breath, you turn the chair and delete the misspelled rebrand to write it the correct way, heart too weak to even look at his reaction. It doesn’t matter anyway, you’re never doing anything like it again. 

You hear him shuffle with the boxes at both your feet and, from the corner of your eye, you see him turning away from you and then back, hands on his hips “I don't think it was a mistake.” 

“Well, it was.” 

“I liked it.” 

That brings out a genuine, short lived laugh out of you “Thank you, I’m a great kisser.” 

You open your brother’s email and pretend there’s an urgent matter inside the contents of one of them until Yunho’s hand closes over yours, over the mouse. 

“Y/N.” 

There’s a lot of things about Jeong Yunho you hate: The swoop of his hair when there’s no gel on it, the free aspect to his nature you’re never going to get even if you try to, that one time he called you an ugly giant after wearing platforms for the first time ever. 

And the sweetness of his voice when he says your name, the plea you hear on it and the shudder it brings to your spirit. It shakes you, it moves you to look at him again, to actually take his feelings into consideration. 

He’s staring at you with so much hurt, it makes your heart sink into an abyss of guilt. 

“Hm?” 

“I think I like you.” 

Oh.

Well, well, well... If it isn't the enemy turning into a potential lover time. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING THE TEASER. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated!

© jensthwa, 2025.

[crkfragmentedsouljams]

fictional cookies suffering? oh myyy 🙃

Last Updated-3/27/25 (Added Smilk & Misty down below, updated general)

| Fragmented Souljams AU! — Introduction/Masterpost ig-

(FSAU for short)

This crk au is basically: What if the ancients loses to the beast and is now under their control? :)

| General Info:

Blog is owned by @cheesymellow (MINOR!) :D, so no weird stuff please 🙏

Fanart & Fanfiction are COMPLETELY OKAY!! (TAG ME IN IT!) Aslong as its sfw. And heck you can send it to my inbox too if you want!

This is still a massive WIP and i dont have that much planned rn for this. But feel free to ask questions in my asksbox or in the comments-

Sometimes im either really active or not at all. If im ever randomly missing probably means i got alot going on in my personal life/school

| Asks Info :

You can ask any sfw questions in my askbox!. I wont reply if its nsfw or anything weird like that

If you want you can ask stuff to the cast (Any cookie related to BY!)

Ex: “Empty Vanilla how is it like in the spire?”, or “Soulless cacao, Do you like peach baos?” <- already used questions. (Its optional to call the ancients by their AU name btw, you can still call them Pure Vanilla, Dark cacao, & Golden cheese :D)

i will most of the time reply with a doodle of the cookie but small chance it will js be dialogue depending on my day- I take a while to answer stuff so bare with me 🥲

Oh yea you can do anon names if you want. Like ✨ anon or smth i dont mind.

If you have any non-au related questions, Just ask in my main blog @cheesymellow

Eyy you interested? If you are, All character info & stories r DOWN BELOW!!

| The Lineup of characters!

—Designs & info may change in the future!

1st, Lets start off with.. The Ancients!

| Pure Vanilla/Empty Vanilla

(Ep7) Empty vanilla is now a shell of his former self. His souljam exploding unknowingly whilst falling down the tower. Injuring him in the chest and half of his face, even severely damaging his memories… Now with those damaged memories. He contemplates if he is “Pure Vanilla” or “Truthless Recluse”. Residing in shadow milk’s domain to find answers. (At least, thats what he’s been told.)

As for Gingerbrave, Strawberry, And Wizard cookie. They all are forced to reside in the spire. Reluctantly joining shadow milk TEMPORARILY obeying orders as they try to escape and recover Empty Vanilla’s memories. (cant think of a color palette)

– Extra Info!:

Empty Vanilla was given his name by none other than Black Sapphire! He found it fitting considering he doesn’t know what he is.

His personality is a mix of Pure Vanilla & Truthless Recluse. Kind and forgiving but sometimes rude and pissed (Mostly to Shadow Milk ☺️)

80% of the time you’ll find him sleeping. The 20% is him doing orders/chores

Also Re-learning both Light magic & Dark Moon magic. That wont go wrong right?

He can see WAYY better now and doesn’t need his staff to see! He only uses it to do magic. (which is barely)

| Golden Cheese/Lusterless Cheese

(Ep5) Burning Spice had TOOO much fun fighting with Golden Cheese that he shattered her souljam in the process. But even after doing that. He still continued to fight her until she somehow managed to escape. Crumbling and bleeding jam as she was holding a piece of her souljam. That had enough power to heal her but… She couldn’t reclaim it. For she has lost to Burning Spice. After that she manages to find Smoked Cheese and barely escape together… They’re now both lost in the desert trying to hide from the Spice Swarm.

Smoked Cheese is in worse condition. His arm almost falling off yet surprisingly still very strong. He still has the soulcheeses with him and vows to protect it with his life despite his dying state.

– Extra Info!:

Lusterless Cheese was a nickname given to her by the Spice Swarm after she lost to Burning Spice. She isnt really that shiny and golden now is she?. Only Smoked Cheese calls her Golden Cheese. (Also just a name so i can differentiate her from canon and this au)

Constantly gets reminded of that fight and is slowly losing hope

She took extra clothes from a nearby village due to hers being heavily damaged & dirty. And has wrapped bandages over all her scratches.

Her wings are slowly regrowing thanks to the bit essence of her souljam!

Speaking of souljam, Burning Spice is delighted by this change. Trying to find out what the shattered souljam can do.

| Dark Cacao/Soulless Cacao

(Ep3) Kneeling down infront of Mystic Flour as he accepts his fate and sees his souljam getting taken.. Mystic Flour attempts to turn him into flour for she feels pity for him. But alas.. No matter how hard she tried, He wouldnt disolve completely. Even after giving up. Until she realized his souljam was shaking uncontrollably, Then—Poof! Shatters unknowingly and simply loses its shine. She is lead to believe this is fate telling her that Dark Cacao could be of good use to her. So she recruits him to become his servant/devoted follower. He accepts willing to find a purpose.

As for his warriors. They are lost in beast yeast, Currently having made their own campsite while trying to find their king.

– Extra Info!:

Soulless Cacao was a name given by Cloud Hatae (Yes this 💩 is alive). Just a random nickname on spot since he has changed.

He dosent use his sword anymore. Doesn’t commit violence at all

As days go by, His memories fade away bit by bit.

He loves watering the plants of the ivory pagoda. And has made good friends with the guards and even Peach

Slowly becoming a peach bao lover..

Keeps his cape/cloak thingy as dear memory/remembrance

2nd, The beasts!

| Shadow Milk

Ever since Pure Vanilla has fallen under his control. Hes been more happy? than ever with a new comrade by his side! But even with all the pieces from the shattered souljam. Its power has.. vanished. He cant reclaim it back. Hes been researching on how he can re-piece its power back while also keeping an eye on what Vanilly’s doing. Giving him books and scrolls to keep him busy and to also try getting his memories back (but slowly reconsidering whether he likes him this way or not) Only time will tell i suppose? Overall still your same silly ol’ jester.

Candy apple and Black sapphire have been tasked to help out Empty Vanilla while hes busy. And lets just say they have mixed feelings about it.

– Extra Info!:

Hes been slowly growing paranoid over pu- Empty Vanilla for a while now. He just dosent feel like the same cookie to him.

Smilk LOVES making outfits for everyone. Hes the one that made Empty Vanilla’s , Gingerbeave, Strawberry, And Wizard cookie’s outfits! He purposely made them all match :D

He has very VERRY flowy hair, You can walk through it. (Sometimes he ties his hair up too when bored)

Gave everyone a plushie of him so he can track all of them anytime.

Everytime he lies, The eyes in his hair show his real emotions/intent >:D,

Shortest among all the beasts. And flies alot to make himseld appear taller (Still taller than EV/PV tho)

Cat pupils

| Mystic Flour

Ever since Soulless Cacao’s arrival. She’s changed a bit. Being less apathetic and more merciful than usual. Even after persuading Soulless Cacao to her side, She couldnt reclaim the souljam either. Unlike Shadow Milk who couldnt reclaim it due to the lack of pieces. She has all and yet all it’ll so is flicker slighty. It has little to no power left but she dosent thrive for the half of her power anymore. She’s just been chilling with the rest until their inevitable doom of disintegrating to flour.

– Extra Info!:

Shes been enjoying the stay of Soulless cacao lately. Feeling the joy of life

Has a spider form when shes mad or pissed, And hides her extra arms inside her robes >:D

Regularly lets Cloud Haetae and sometimes Soulless Cacao fix her hair

Secretly enjoys peach baos and its flavor. and is trying to secretly make her own garden-

Her eyes are scary to everyone except Soulless. And maybee cloud haetae but depends on the situation honestly

——————————

Thats all for now! I am STRUGGLING ON DRAWING BURNING SPICE IM SO SORRY WAAAA THIS IS LIKE SOULLESS CACAO ALL OVER AGAIN. I MIGHT add burning spice’s info but without the drawing or only add it once i finally draw him. lmao we’ll see ig

LOOK- I MOSTLY DRAW FEMALES AND I DONT KNOW ANATOMY JUST BARE WITH ME BARE WITH M-

Oh yea have a lovely day

[finishwhatyoustarted-event]

Finish What You Started 2025 - Event Rules

[simple ID, more in alt: basic rules for the event. End ID.]

The goal of this event is to get things done that you’ve already started. We all have unfinished projects whose incomplete status haunts us. Those are what we want to tackle!

The structure is loose, as this is a multimedia event. While primarily aimed at writers, this event is open to any kind of creative fanwork. Fics, translations, podfics, fanart, animations, cosplay - if you started it and never got it done, it qualifies. There is no sign-up required. I will not assign beta readers for writers, but I can boost requests for those who want them! And I can boost messages of those who would like to beta read.

The mod is a danmei fan mainly, but your work can be any fandom. Maybe something you started before your current fandom excitement took over, or one you keep putting off in favor of compelling new ideas.

Feel free to pass this event info along! The more the merrier!

Further rules and clarifications:

Alt text is very encouraged, especially for boost posts or artwork! Remember, alt text is searchable (so much as anything ever is on this site), so it can help more people find your work as well as letting vision- and internet-impaired fans enjoy it (which is its main purpose).

Machine Generated or “AI” images and writing are not permitted. If you are found in violation of this rule, you will be removed from the event. All images, writing, or other works must be your own.

If your work is NSFW, I will only boost it if it has appropriate content warnings. Spoilering images is recommended but not required as long as it’s tagged. Do not letter-swap or abbreviate content warnings. These are so people can mute them as needed. Example: “gore” not “g0re”

Remember Tumblr can mute phrases, but each warning should be its own tag as well as in the body.

Please use genderbend or genderswap for characters depicted not as canon genders. Example: “#NSFW #genderbend #gore”

Please use Omegaverse or A/O/B for that content. The original letter order is a slur against Aboriginal peoples and will not be tolerated here, even with the slashes. It, like other racial or identity-based slurs, fall under hate speech and are thus not permitted.

This is a positive, shared space. Do not belittle other creators’ medium of choice. Please no fandom/character/ship/creator bashing, and don’t berate artists or authors for not being done with something, even if they don’t finish by the end of the event. Also, please don’t passive-aggressively send this event to the author of an unfinished fic you want to see done faster. 😥 Be cool, respect each other, and keep any interpersonal disagreements to your own tumblrsphere.

Schedule and Hashtags

This account will post weekly morale-boosting messages and helpful resources. Every Friday, starting March 14th, will be Finished It Friday. All the completed works posted that week will be boosted together in a big thread, so we can celebrate your accomplishment!

Halfway-point check-in is April 1st. Final event deadline is April 30th. The last Finished It Friday is May 9th.

All posts and boosts will be crossposted to the event bsky (finishwhatyoustart.bsky.social) and Discord. Expanded rules, explanations, and Dead Dove guidelines can also be found on the Discord. (invite link in pinned post)

Fics can be posted to the AO3 collection (archiveofourown(dot)org /collections /FinishWhatYouStarted2025_Spring)

Work-in-progress posts should be tagged #FinishWhatYouStarted2025 . If you complete a wip within the event, tag it #IFinishedWhatIStarted2025 for boosting so we can all celebrate!

FAQ:

Q: Are original works acceptable?

A: This is primarily a fanwork-focused event. If original work is the only WIP you have to work on, it’s certainly fine to work on it during the time frame of the event. If it is posted publicly when finished, you may tag it for boosting.

Q: Are there any restrictions on topics?

A: No, so long as your event # post is properly & fully tagged for content (see rules about tagging above). "Dead Dove” topics are allowed. Some submissions will be 18+. For me, this is less about the content and more about finishing it.

Q: Are there any restrictions on media that can be submitted?

A. All content created must be your own and must abide from other stated rules. The usual restrictions based on laws and Community Guidelines of course apply, so you may need to tailor how you post to which event space your interacting with. Twitter, Tumblr, and Discord all have their own rules. There are also some topics that are in poor taste to make fanworks around. The event organizer and mods reserve the right to not boost your work if they decide it is rage-baiting or trolling. They are not responsible for negative reactions to your works. Please be respectful of those you share a digital space with.

Keep in mind that when I link to your finished work during a Finished It Friday, it may reach a wider audience than you may be used to.

Find more information and community on the Discord, if you want! Joining the Discord is not required for the event. As always, if you have questions, don’t hesitate to reach out!

[changelingsandothernonsense]

Wip Whenever- Ow! My Freaken Ears! Edition...

Ceth's hypersensitive atm Thanks to @silly-little-diary and @skyrim-forever for tagging me.💕💕

...

Anyway, I spent a chunk of time painting ears. Ears are complicated things that have annoying amounts of foreshortening, but this is an exercise piece, so shit's meant to be a challenge.

So we got ears, a lot of facial features and now teeth. Tackling his regular teeth first before the gold teeth and then lips. It's starting to leave the potato phase.

I've been tossing up whether I should post more on Ashlander Burials since I'm almost done with the document. I have decided to post info about both the hair cutting and scarification rituals under the cut, since I've been drawing Joshi with a shaved head recently and there's a very big reason why he's done it.

The practice of “Sipittu” or “Mourning” in Redoran Dunmeris is a long and often lonely process. It is the most ritualised part of the process and will be the most visible to outsiders. The practice of sipittu is the final acknowledgement of death and is therefore the longest step in our mourning rites. Ideally, the rite begins at sundown on the evening before the final interment. Harrowed adults [those who have taken their adult rites of passage] close to the deceased, usually the surviving spouse, siblings, harrowed offspring, will begin the rite in deep meditation. This spans the time it takes for the sun to set and can either be done out in the ash dunes or within one’s yurt if conditions aren’t favourable. This meditation is intended to be done facing Red Mountain, which is usually visible no matter where you are on Vvardenfell, though I have done this practice in other provinces too and tried my best to approximate my location. The main point is for the mountain, which receives the shadow souls of our dead, hears our wishes for the safe separation and rebirth of our loved ones’ souls, so that they might be free to interact with us once bound.

Once the sun has set and dusk starts settling in, the next step of sipittu begins. Known in Ashland as “Sar” or “to shave”, the meaning is quite self-explanatory. It is expected that the mourner rid themselves of the hair on their head before they can move onto the next rite. This is done immediately after meditation with a ceremonial kris similar to the one I had mentioned earlier. A chitin or bone blade with a channel down the centre to collect blood. In this case, the knife has an invigorating enchantment that uses the owner’s blood as its source of power and is intended to be used as a painkiller. Blood letting plays a large role in both sar and the next stage, “Kud” or “cut”, which I will explain further down.

Ashlanders believe that our hair holds our memories, experiences and strength. It is rare to see a mer cut it in full. Yes, many warriors chose to shave the sides or the under section of their heads, but most of the length is left behind. An Ashlander with long hair is seen as strong, healthy and a keeper of wisdom. To cut one’s hair is a statement; to shave it all off even more so. We generally do not cut our hair without reason, and even the partially shaved heads of warriors carry significance. Hair length is a good indicator of a Dunmer’s emotional state, and short or freshly shaved hair is one sign amongst many that the mer is maintaining a period of mourning and isolation. It tells us how best to interact.

Shaving one’s hair is a sign to everyone that you have suffered a deep, soul-shattering loss. We do this to different extents. A warrior might maintain a partially shaved head in acknowledgement of the nature of their position, one that often must result in death. My late husband sported such a hairstyle, as do I. We remember the lives we have taken in our line of work and those we have lost in battle.

Sar follows a similar principle, only it calls for the complete removal of the hair from the head. A loss of a loved one is seen as more impactful than the death of a stranger or enemy. It requires deep contemplation, and we believe that removing the old length in its entirety is an ultimately freeing exercise. One starts after meditation by roughly hacking off the length, trying to get as close to the scalp as possible so that when one does shave, there is less resistance. The close shave is done systematically. The blade is placed along the hairline and scraped in a crescent motion along the scalp. Cutting so close to the scalp tends to draw blood before too long, and as such, feeds the invigorating enchantment folded into the blade. We sing another prayer to the ancestors as we shave our heads. The process should be finished just as the last of the stars appear in the sky.

The head is then washed with warm water and soothing alchemical herbs, as is the face. The skin along the cheeks must be clean before the next rite takes place. “Kud” or “to cut” consists of a ritual scarification ceremony. Like all scarification rituals we practice, the act of cutting is left to the Wise Woman and cannot be performed by anyone else. The mourner will usually kneel before her as she performs the rite, though the rite can also be performed with the mourner lying down if need be.

Usually, this ritual is done within the Wise Woman’s yurt. The air is thick with burning incense, and spirit fires are lit before the blade ever touches the mourner’s skin. This rite must be done in front of the ancestors, and the Wise Woman often serves as the magical reservoir so that these ghosts might be present.

Long, thin, tapered lines are carved into the skin. The smallest cuts are drawn just below the inner corners of the eyes, adjacent to the nose bridge. Longer cuts are made starting from the lower eyelid and travelling down, across the cheek and stopping at the jaw. Three cuts are usually made if the mourner is remembering the loss of a relative, friend, or spouse. A fourth one is made if the mourner is remembering the deaths of multiple people, and can either be a small cut, identical to the one on the inner corner of the eye, or, if the number of people is significant, a diamond-shaped wound is carved instead.

If one has done sar correctly, then this rite will not be particularly painful. However, we generally offer all who participate in the ceremony a resin mixture made of healing plants that is intended to be inhaled towards the end of the ceremony. Smoking hookah relaxes everyone after a tense and often draining session and is considered celebratory in nature. The fresh cuts will be cleaned and treated so as to avoid infection, and then the mourners join the rest of their clan for a final meal before they embark towards the burial caverns at sunrise.

[seastarblue]

new year, new me, new intro! as always this is subject to change as time goes on <3

all ids in alt ~ ✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚

Nice to meet you! You can call me Sea, or Seastar, or whatever really I don’t mind too much!

-> About Me:

She / Her

19

AroAce

Black and Muslim (feel free to ask about either ^^)

Somewhat neurodivergent but I don’t know what exactly …

My favorite colors are red, yellow, and blue! Classics.

Favorite food is really anything my mom makes 🙏

I try to be funny sometimes and idk if it works but I’m doing it anyways

I’d like to use more tone indicators (like /pos, /gen, etc) and to ID more images here ! sometimes I forget…

CST (GMT -5 I think?)

✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚

Anyways. Onto…

-> what I do and post about:

I’m a writer (or I try to be), artist (again: try to be), and a professional Silly Lil Guy 😌. I’d like to be a pharmacist soon, I’m planning on going to college for that !

This is my Main Blog! Here I’ll post about:

My cool Moots and their charatcers

Updates on my writing, art, and life in general

Prompts! I wanna make prompts! And reblog cool ones too

Writing!

Art!

✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚

I’ve got a pretty decent tagging system if I do say so myself ^^ so a quick guide to that here:

#sea speaks! - for when I have random stuff to say! not always about writing stuff though

#sea draws - self explanatory

#sea’s asks - self explanatory

#sea’s games - for now, its tag games I’ve participated in! hopefully I’ll start making my own games soon…

#sea’s moots - for things that my (Aweseomesauce) mutuals have done

#sea’s story 1-7 - posts relating to WIPs of mine! more on those… in a bit

✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚

-> Important Links:

I have theee tag lists! This one is for writing , this one is for tag games, and this one is for art

Dm me if you want on any ^^

here’s my master list for prompts! hopefully I’ll fill it up soon ^^

✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚

✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚

now onto…

-> My Original Works:

All art that’s done by me is under the tag #sea draws (I’m SO bad at tagging sometimes tho so expect some stragglers)

I participated in Writemas last year! here are all my entries for it

(literally half of this ain’t canon no more sobs)

more about my WIPs under the cut:

-> Ardenia WIPs:

(Psst, the following all come from one specific world, of my own creation! In order, it’d be the unnamed one, Interwoven, then TGS, then AGGTRG!)

Interwoven - lovingly tagged as #sea’s story 1 status: hiatus as I figure out more Plot — outlining Genre: Fantasy Themes: family, friendship, grief, loyalty, power, justice, belonging

[will fill out soon]

———

A Golem’s Guide to Regaining Goodness - lovingly tagged as #sea’s story 2 status: brainstorming and shitposting Genre: Post Apocalyptic Fantasy Themes: Identity, belonging, morality, family

A former war golem, Arbor, and his young dragon companion Fiamma, travel the now war torn continent of Ardenia. Join them as they meet new people, explore the realm, and search for the answer to a single question: “What makes someone good?”

———

The Guiding Star - lovingly tagged as #sea’s story 3 status: brainstorming only because I don’t have enough Plot to shitpost Genre: Steampunk Pirate Fantasy Themes: (idk yet) Masterpost (Very Undone)

(will fill this out more later)

———

[Title Pending.] - will be lovingly tagged as #sea’s story 4 Status: just an idea Genre: Fantasy (structured like a field guide) Themes: (idk yet)

A field guide of Ardenia, written a long time ago.

———

and now the WIP that isn’t a part of Ardenia:

[Title Also Pending] - will be lovingly tagged as #sea’s story 5

Either way, it’s a whump story surrounding a healer and a crownchain knight, both of which are trapped in a fighting ring against their will!

It’s set in the Crownchain universe, which was created by @whumpdreaming and I HIGHLY recommend their content ok peak whump right there!

✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚✶⋆.˚

Now that the yapping’s outta the way… I’d like to take a moment and say…

to all my lovely lovely moots and followers: I love yall sm <3

stay funky, and have a wonderful day!

[notjustjavierpena]

Wake

Series Masterpost | Main Masterpost | Support a disabled creator

A/N: Finally another part of my darksugardaddy!joel. This has been sitting in my WIPs for a while, and I’m so pleased with how it turned out. Be kind to me as I haven’t written in a while and I feel terrible about starving you all of content.

Summary: Joel comes home to fuck your lights out. 

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader/you (no y/n)

Tags: +18 smut, dub-con with non-con elements, painful and rough sex, p in v sex, choking, passing out, degradation, abusive behavior, creampie, dirty talk, no aftercare, sugar daddy, daddy kink

Word count: 2k

Link to this work on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50908876

Wake

It’s a late afternoon when you come to a realization; you don’t love Joel Miller, and you don’t think you could ever love Joel Miller. He is everything that you’ve been taught to hate if you want to believe in fairytales. Your parents would disapprove of him so immediately that you’d be terrified of them cutting you off from them if they knew of his existence.

You’ve never had a man be this rough with you, and only occasionally stroking your hair in apology afterward, but you suppose that the copious amounts of money spent on you - clothes that feel like armor around regular men and expensive bottles of wine that might as well have been potions designed to make you insane - is enough to make up for any unpleasantries within what you don’t dare call a relationship. 

You don’t love him but you can’t hate him. Not in a way that any other person would. How else would you surround yourself with pretty things? You’re no good at anything else than being what he needs.

Whenever he has had a bad day, you know the roughness will increase. It always starts the same; with a slam of the mansion door and a hungry search for you through the obnoxiously large building. He calls for you and you don’t dare not to answer, and in the end, he finds you in the extravagant living room - one of many - with its gold-rimmed glass tables and Chesterfield couches. You’ve been reading a book, but you put it down the second he enters and don’t even bother asking to read to the next full stop. 

“There you are,” he almost heaves for breath with exhaustion from his anger. He isn’t angry at you - you know this - but still, you find yourself treading lightly when his voice is so cold that the living room seems to drop a few degrees in temperature and causing your nipples to harden at the sudden change.

Then, as part of your ritual, he gets a thick wad of bills from the inside pocket of his suit and places it on the nearest surface. A bank transfer won’t do in these situations. He needs something physical, something he can hold in his hand and flash before you, and you know that he wants you to fall to your knees and beg for the warmth and dirtiness of the printed bills against your clean skin.

You’re just about to when he interrupts you.

“There will be more when you wake,” he promises, voice almost too quiet and restrained. Like he is saving his strength. 

You notice his choice of words; when you wake.

Wake.

You gulp. You’ll have to take it in stride. You’ll have to play the part.

You rise from your seat and he watches you patiently. You say nothing as you lower yourself onto the glass table and then lie down on your back, knowing it can hold because Joel would never buy a surface that he couldn’t have you on. 

You’ve learned not to wear anything too difficult to get out of, so it takes little time for you to pull off your skirt. Though you struggle a bit with your underwear since they’re already damp, sticking to the outline of your cunt and the sight makes Joel smirk like the Devil. Curse him, you think, for knowing that you can barely function when he looms over you like a giant, like a dangerous predator that hasn’t tasted blood for weeks. 

When you manage to maneuver your panties down your thighs, he twitches with impatience and curls his whole fist around the cotton fabric. He yanks them down and watches them twist into themselves as he pulls them down over the length of your legs and off your feet. 

They catch on your heels for the tiniest second. He gracefully undoes the ankle straps of them and drops each one onto the floor after taking it off. The anticipation is killing you, toying with your ability to breathe properly and even moreso at the humiliation of only wearing your top now. 

“Pull it down,” he commands, gesturing to it. You start to yank at the bottom to pull it over your head but he growls, “Down. Not off, stupid bitch.”

Oh. 

You pull the neckline down to settle it underneath your breasts, feeling like something on display with the way that Joel takes you in. His cock strains against the front of his pants, his breath uneven, when he cups both of your tits in his hands and pushes them roughly together. His thumbs skim over your hardened nipples, causing you to moan and he responds by pinching them instead until the moan transforms into a whimper.

“I’m gonna fuck you until your pretty little lights go out,” he mutters, pinches, and then tugs a bit on your nipples until you move involuntarily, “Lie still. Don’t give me any shit.”

He takes a step back, his gaze pinning you down whilst he undoes his belt. You refrain from shivering in case he tells you off once more, but you’re so close to doing it when you hear the noise of his zipper. A gush of wetness seeps from you, possibly smearing the glass surface that you are lying on. 

“Please,” you say pathetically.

“Please what?” He asks as if he doesn’t care.

“Daddy,” you present your cunt for him by opening your legs and Joel instinctively looks at your quivering slit, “Please fuck me.”

Joel steps between your legs, using his knees to push them even further apart. He towers over you, cock standing impressively into the air after he has shoved his pants and underwear down his thighs. He tuts at the desperate look in your eyes, “I barely make it through the front door before you’re spreading your legs for me.”

You want to argue that he was the one who sought you out, but he might leave you with a throbbing cunt if you have the audacity to play smart with him, so instead you just nod with a breathless ‘yes’.

He places one knee on the coffee table, following up with scooping a hand underneath the small of your back to align your lower pelvises. His grip is so strong, his bare skin, the amount you are allowed to feel, burns against your own. Like King Midas, his touch enriches you, turns you into something as valuable as gold. 

His cock breaches your tight cunt moments after. He watches you intently as your eyes screw shut with the inevitable sting that it brings due to his generous girth. He seats himself to the hilt inside of you and reaches something you didn’t even know a man could get to when he presses his hand into the spot where it rests on your back. 

“Good girl,” he praises with a strained moan, “How do you feel?”

“Full,” you say shakily and teasingly clench around him. 

He takes in a sharp breath, and before you know it, his free hand has come down on your right breast in a harsh slap. He adds to it by palming your throat afterward, tightly gripping it when you try to squeeze around his length again after not having been given time to react to the consequence of doing it the first time. You smirk up at him and he nearly loses his mind. 

“God, you just want it bad, don’t you, little girl?” His hips draw back and he keeps you waiting for the briefest second before slamming them forward again. The force behind his thrusts is borderline painful, but the way his hand arches your back makes his cockhead pound your front wall. 

The moans you let out are barely there, high-pitched or silent with the way he knocks all wind out of you whilst simultaneously cutting off oxygenated blood to your brain.

He fucks you like an animal, all groans and grunts, sweat dripping from his brow because he is too hungry for dominance to undress. He loves being able to quickly flee the scene afterward and loves leaving you with no clothes on so you cannot follow him. 

But it’s not the amount of clothes that he wears compared to you that gets you close to the edge. It is the fact that nothing around you feels real except for him. Even you don’t feel real but rather closer to an inanimate object that only comes alive because of the dark eyes that penetrate your own. 

You’ve known this fact for a while. Despite the love not being there, you know that after this arrangement has started - you don’t know what else to call it - his mere looking at you is what makes you materialize. 

Your fingers come up to curl around his wrist. You cannot breathe and it fucking hurts, only dulled by the way that your cunt starts to flutter with how close he has gotten you to the edge. You hadn’t expected him to make you come. 

With wide eyes, you look up at him in an attempt to tell him what is going on. He holds your gaze, pleased with himself as he drives into you, “I know, little girl, don’t have to tell me, I can feel you.” 

You don’t have the guts to fight his harsh hand. You take it with tears forming in your eyes and the feeling of your pulse pounding in your neck where it’s fighting to get past his bruising grip. 

“Say it, say that you love me, that you’re nothing without me,” he commands, but when you try to speak it is nothing but a squeak. He has his hand so tightly around your windpipe that you cannot get a word past your lips, drooling and shaking underneath his lack of mercy as your tongue feels too big for your mouth. He grins maniacally down at you as your vision blurs around the edges, “Made you speechless, did I? You filthy whore.”

You have always been familiar with the term putting someone’s lights out, but you’ve never understood the true meaning until Joel came into your life. You come hard, unfolding beneath his touch, with tears on your cheeks - and then there’s nothing.

Like a child falling asleep in a car seat, you have been carried up the stairs and into your bedroom. You sit up in your comfy bed and try to piece together how you have gotten here, and when you realize, it is because of your underwear and skirt messily and hurriedly sitting around your ankles. 

You tug your bottom garments up again. There is something sticky between your legs, and you know, immediately. what it is when you start to shift your legs and are hit with soreness. Everything hurts, but nothing seems to be broken or damaged. 

You glance to your right and spot the stack of bills that Joel had flashed earlier. It is neatly placed on the edge of the table along with a glass of water and some aspirin. You’ll take them soon, need to feel the ache a little while longer.

Instead of doing what is most comfortable (like taking the damn pills), you reach for the money instead. A delusional person would argue that they still feel warm, the temperature somewhere between newly printed and body heat. You take a few of them in your hand, and then you press them against your skin. The fact that you find it soothing is pathetic.

The wonder and innocence of being carried upstairs as a kid doesn’t translate into adulthood, you think, and then you lay down to fall into a deep sleep.

.

.

If you would like to follow my writing then go follow @notjustjavierpena-fics and turn on notifications 💖❤️

[host-of-your-screen]

WHY HELLO, [OBJECT]S AND [ITEM]S!!!

Have YOU ever wanted to SHAMELESSLY throw dark dollars at THE LORD OF SCREENS?! WHAT'S THAT?? You don't have any DARK DOLLARS?? THEN SIT THROUGH 2 MINUTES OF ADS FIRST!!

THEN you can send chats to the LORD OF SCREENS, YOUR "HOST!" Show him images! Spam his chat with emojis! (don't do that.) He's the only "AI SLOP" you'll ever need! Hah! Don't ever say that about me again.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

a roleplay/askblog for a DELTASWAP Tenna, "THE HOST"! currently in heavy WIP as I'm just starting this with no real plan (yet!)

(mod disclaimer : i have chronic pain so i may not be able to answer everything quickly. please be patient with me!)

(also as said in the description, this is shamelessly HEAVILY inspired by @checkthescript , PLEASE go check out their work!!)

>[CHECK]

YOUR HOST is currently sitting in his room...

Status: Content.

HP: 4500/4500

AT: 10

DF: 4

EQUIPPED: DropletStickr

HEIGHT: About 7 Wailord Plushies

BLOG STATUS: Mansion is flooding.

MAGIC ANON: Water around The Host Dissolves, by virtue of the DropletStickr.

TAGS:

#YOUR HOST! - Every post including Host, which would be.. Most of if not all of them..

#PARASOCIAL TIME WITH STREAMER! - Flirts and the like. Remember kids, parasocialism is bad! ..Can you say it again?

#HOSTING FUN TIME! - dubiously canon interactions with others, that are usually just for fun.

#IMPOSTER HOST?! - ooc stuff, from the mod

#MODS! BAN THIS ANON! - Host getting particularly pissed off at someone.

#REPEAT SHOW! - previous parts of a roleplay chain. recommended to filter if you want to only see the latest response.

will add more...

individuals will get their own tag!

WHAT WE KNOW SO FAR...

-Chariot is Host's ex wife. This is his Queen.

-He's lived in the mansion for 5 years now.

-Host is a Sony brand flatscreen.

-He is also Japanese because of this and owns some Japanese brand items in his mansion.

-Someone close to Host left to be a "Wheel Of Fortune actor."

OTHER:

-The Host will remember you if you're off anon or use signoffs!

-He will keep things you give him, either in his inventory or in his mansion somewhere.

-I will try to respond to any asks I get, but please try not to send them repeatedly unless you think it got eaten. Sending lots of asks (that are obviously not the same thing) is encouraged, though! Host might even grow fond of you!

-This blog is technically multi/selfship friendly, its just that Host is very.. Picky. You're free to try and befriend and flirt with him, but he won't swoon over strangers! ..not in that way at least.

-Host is a smoker, but not an alcoholic. I'm not personally comfortable/fond of writing someone with an alcohol addiction -- though his nicotine one isn't much better. But you could try to knock that habit out of him..!

-if you want to know about how the swap works -- you can ask Host yourself! It's more fun that way ^)

-My deltarune main is @tennaromantic, though do mind that is also our headmates sideblog, so be nice to him. If you have any questions for me specifically I'd prefer you stick them to here!

-This pin is subjected to change as I fine tune the blog.

-Have fun!!

-I repeat again. this is pretty much all based on checkthescript. PLEASEEE go check them out i love their work

[kaitsawamura]

🪞 🔮 🍅 🧺 🍯 🌱 The Farmer & The Wizard

❦ SUMMARY ❦

You need a change, a big one. When your estranged grandfather passes away and bequeaths you his farm in a little town just south of the middle of nowhere, you take it as the sign you needed to make a change instead of waiting for one.

The farm, while having fallen into a state of disrepair, is just the thing to cure your modern-world ailments. The people are kind and always ready to offer help, if a bit unusual. They have old superstitions, a haunted community center, and a resident wizard. Spoiler alert: those last two on the list take some getting used to.

Yes, things are different here but you have a sneaking suspicion that the slow pace and a certain alchemical practitioner are going to remind you that sometimes, all you need is time and a little bit of magic.

THIS SCROLL WAS LAST UPDATED: 6/1/24

❦ STATS ❦

Pairing: Wizard!Gojo Satoru x Farmer!Reader

Rating: M for Mature, 18+ only minors do not interact

Warnings: Fantasy/Stardew Valley violence, sexual content, angst (maybe like just a tiny lil bit)

Tags: Stardew Valley AU, strangers to friends to lovers, red thread of fate, soulmates (kinda) eventual smut, fluff focused, canon divergent, more tags to come (literally am too excited, I need to get this masterlist post out in the world lol)

Projected Word Count: 100K

Author’s Note: In unsurprising news, I have still been in the trenches with my Stardew Valley hyperfixation. Then, along comes this lovely PC Gojo mod and the fate of this fic was sealed. It's going to be inspired a touch by that mod (which I will link below, full credit to that amazing modder) and will heavily follow a standard Stardew Valley play through timeline. I'm a lil nervous to write Gojo since he doesn't fall neatly into the character type I normally am drawn to but I have WRITING HANDS (like jazz hands but for writers :P ) and so I'm adding another fic to my WIPs list.

Important Note: This fic is part of this blog's contribution to the @ficsforgaza initiative!

❦ LINKS ❦

Fics for Gaza Masterlist <- now linked! ->

GOJO MOD FOR PC'ERS

JJK Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Playlist

Moodboard

❦ TABLE OF CONTENTS ❦

SPRING

Part 1: In Which You Unexpectedly Receive The Deed to A Farm

Part 2 | In Progress | TBL

SUMMER

Placeholder

AUTUMN

Placeholder

WINTER

Placeholder

This work and its digital elements (credit for pixel art to ConcernedApe) are © Kait of @kaitsawamura 2020-PRESENT. I do not own any rights to Stardew Valley and any subsequent settings/characters, but this work is heavily inspired by that amazing game. Please do not alter or copy this work. Please do not repost this work to other platforms without my express permission.

[spirk-fic-recs]

Need your help finding a fic I’ve wanted to re-read for years 😅 I remember reading it on AO3, pretty sure it was pre-2020 (I don’t remember exactly when I read it, definitely was several years ago, I barely remember anything about it💀). It was an AU where for whatever reason Kirk goes to school on Vulcan (idk if the VSA specifically), maybe as an exchange student? I remember that Spock was intrigued by him, but he didn’t want to be (like he couldn’t help his attraction to Kirk; I think Spock kept looking at Kirk’s hands throughout the story lmao).

From my hazy recollection I remember at the start of the fic that Spock notices Kirk get off the arrival ship, how his eyes and blond hair stood out. He doesn’t know Kirk’s name yet so he refers to Kirk as the blond boy, or human boy and then eventually as Kirk/Jim. I remember the vibe of other Vulcans having an interest in Kirk and Spock doesn’t like that (jealousy perhaps lol).

I think Spock and Kirk made out in a secluded spot near the end of the story (I think they were hiding for some reason, sorry that’s not specific 😭).

I don’t think it was ever from Kirk’s perspective, only Spock’s. I don’t remember any of the other principal cast being involved, just Spock and Kirk (pretty sure Kirk was the only human student hence all the Vulcans focused on him). I think it was AOS but could’ve been TOS tagged as well.

P.S. I know it’s not the fic “Bonded” by TenSpencerReidPlease, I checked it because it has some similar elements.

Thanks in advance!

Hi Nonny!

I apologize for my late response, IRL has been 💀 lately and I wasn’t able to check my inbox on time— but I still wanted or give this ask the time it deserved.

Unfortunately I was unable to locate this story within the time frame of my search, but I have come across several similarly compelling tales, which I shall now be linking below. They are similar in concept but are like, a bit off- some have Jim as the main POV and others do not adhere to your description of their first meeting. I will be listing them from most similar to least.

To anyone who is familiar with this story please don’t hesitate to reply in the comments!!

Lessons Learned (AOS, WIP, 62098 words) by CMMA3

Someone gets the bright idea to start a school for very gifted and troubled human youth on Vulcan. Young James Kirk, after driving the car off the cliff, gets sent to be one of the first class of students who are all in the upper 99.999% of humans and have some sort of instability issues. Amanda ropes Spock into attending .

Vrekasht (AOS, 51134 words) by madlysanecatlady

Jim moves to Vulcan with his mother, leaving behind his status as outcast on Earth to become the outcast on Vulcan. Little does he know, that position has already been filled.

I Just Need A Quiet Place (Where I Can Scream How I Love You) (AOS, WIP, 33158 words) by VictorMors

After being stranded on Tarsus IV, Jim is rescued by a Vulcan Vessel. With Frank avoiding Starfleet, and Winona Kirk on a deep space mission, Jim's guardianship hangs in the balance. But with his budding relationship with the Ambassador's son, and the patience of T'sai Amanda, Jim isn't sure he minds.

Brats (AOS, 6945 words) by htebazytook

High School AU. Kirk's mother is stationed on Vulcan. Kirk goes to Spock for help with fancy Vulcan school, and Spock goes to Kirk for help with . . . biology.

Xenolinguistics Means You've Got A Talented Tongue (AOS, 7578 words) by goddess_julie

James T Kirk can not be tamed. Until he's sent to Vulcan to continue his studies. Here is where he learns about Vulcans, their traditions and becomes the man he's meant to be.

AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE BECAUSE ITS CUTE AND FUNNY:

Moving Fast (AOS, [SPOCK POV] , 4789 words) by yaoichan12

"Mother, Father," Spock said. His arm was around the blonde next to him. "I would like you to meet Jim. My bondmate."

Amanda and Sarek stared at their son and Jim.

"We were only gone two months," Amanda said.

Anyways, I really hope that you’ll be able to find this fic! It sounds like an absolute gem. In the mean time, take some of my offerings to tide you over XD

Happy Reading and happy end of pride month lol

-M

[captainmagpie-risha]

WIP whenever bc i'm always late anyway

Hi !! I was tagged by @sugar-peanut-cat and @nevarrantorte 🥰

I worked on my Cullavellan longfic during the past week AND a bit on a hurt/comfort prompt with Davrin and Kallian (my HoF-Rook) ! The latter is below the cut because of heavy non graphic content.

Hi kind mutuals !! No pressure tag + feel free to ignore (as always tell me if you don't want to to be tagged 💖 + with whatever medium you'd like) : @madluluwriting (i know you wrote this week don't lie to me omg) @ad-astra-per-studium @blackwall-my-tiny-husband @anora-mac-tired @toastghostisatoaster @palenecromaniac @ubiquitous26 @underthevenadahl @glitteringdust @silhalei @davrinsleftpectoral @oxygenforthewicked @p0lkadotdotdot @valgeristik @ajastu @nananarc

Please bear in mind English is not my first language ❤ Original in French below the cut for those interested ; i translated without altering the sentences so some of them may not be super natural to read.

Cullennera longfic ; news about the Lavellan clan reached Skyhold before their departure to Crestwood and Ennera is grieving. She just went out of her bedroom ; Cassandra was wainting (im)patiently in the corridor to speak to her.

Rough EN translation

“Sister Leliana informed us. As well as Master Thetras. How…” “I’m fine,” Ennara cuts her off, her voice calm but dry. “Do not tell me you stood there the whole afternoon ?” “That is…” “You are not my bodyguard, and we have much work to do. I can survive one afternoon crying in my bedroom.” The Seeker tries to open her mouth but Ennera passes her, her hand up to instruct her to not respond. She only realizes how much she was seething when she finishes delivering these words. “Inquisitor.” Back turned to her friend who still hasn’t moved, the Inquisitor stops mid-way in the corridor, then accepts to turn around, a lump in her throat. “I am deeply sorry for your loss. When i lost Anthony…” Her cracking voice echoes distinctly in the silent aisle of the Skyhold Fortress. Even Cassandra’s eyes are misted by a sorrow she contains with dignity. “I wanted to burn the whole world and disappear under its ashes.” “Problem is, if i lose control, it is exactly what I risk to do,” Ennera hisses in return, surlier than she desires. “Let’s move on.” She presses her lips together in order to prevent another stinger, filled by shame. The Seeker does not seem to feel much hurt — surprise, certainly, but it does not last. Her sole response is to get closer and reach out for the little mage’s hand she then presses between her fingers. The warmth from the contact seems unbearable ; when Ennera considers evading it, Cassandra brings her hand to her lips while bowing, with a reverence so innate that it can only be familiar to her. “Inquisitor. I once refused to be relieved of my burden, but you do not have to carry yours alone.”

Original - FR

—Soeur Léliana nous a mis au courant. Ainsi que Maître Thetras. Comment… —Je vais bien, la coupe Ennera d’une voix calme, mais sèche. Ne me dites pas que vous êtes restée là toute l’après-midi ? —C’est-à-dire que… —Vous n’êtes pas mon garde du corps, et nous avons beaucoup à faire. Je devrais survivre à une après-midi à pleurer dans ma chambre. La Chercheuse cherche à ouvrir la bouche, mais Ennera la dépasse en levant la main pour lui intimer de ne pas répondre. Ce n’est que lorsqu’elle a fini de prononcer ces mots qu’elle comprend à quel point elle bouillonne. —Inquisitrice. Dos à son amie qui n’a toujours pas bougé, l’Inquisitrice s’arrête à mi-chemin du couloir, puis accepte enfin de se retourner, la gorge serrée. —Je suis navrée pour votre perte. Lorsque j’ai perdu Anthony… Le craquement de sa voix se fait distinctement entendre dans l’aile silencieuse de Fort Céleste. Même les yeux de Cassandra brillent d’une peine qu’elle contient, digne. —J’avais envie de brûler le monde entier et de disparaître sous ses cendres. —Le problème, c’est que si je ne me maîtrise pas, c’est exactement ce que je risque de faire, siffle Ennera en retour, plus hargneuse qu’elle ne le désirait. Passons à autre chose. Elle compresse ses lèvres l’une contre l’autre pour s’éviter une nouvelle réplique assassine, honteuse. La Chercheuse ne semble pas plus heurtée que cela — surprise, certainement, mais cela ne dure pas. Elle s’approche et va chercher la main de la petite mage pour la serrer entre les siennes. Le contact lui paraît insoutenable ; lorsqu’elle songe à s’y soustraire, Cassandra la porte à ses lèvres en s’inclinant, dans un geste de révérence si naturel qu’il ne peut que lui être familier. —Inquisitrice. J’ai jadis refusé que l’on m’aide à porter mon fardeau, mais vous n’avez pas à porter le vôtre seule.

And for the Davllian hurt&comfort prompt. Kallian had a nightmare and woke up in panic next to Davrin. DA:V pré-Act 3, already established situationrelationship. This one will be shorter so, if it's not too bad, i can translate it entirely one day ! (Will probably rephrase some things tho.)

TW Heavy content ; nightmare about past abuse, non graphic.

EN - rough translation

The sensation remains stuck to her even once she has emerged. In her throat, her breath chokes itself, raspy and sharp. She feels crushed glass running underneath her skin like so many putrid insects, scratching and scratching so much she wants to rip it off. Here on her neck, impaled fangs; there on her legs, that she kicks to scare off the ghosts holding her; and-… The tremor shakes her so violently her muscles hurt. Something moves next to her; Davrin comes to her slowly, touches her unreal hand, and then speaks. His words seem distant behind all the noise in her head and with her heart pounding in her ears. Soon, she realizes she’s at the Lighthouse. Assan, who apparently already joined them on the bed, cuddles her, pushing her enough to make her accept, without thinking much, to lean against the other warden. The feathers against her feverish skin; Davrin’s firm hand, just laying there, below the nape of her neck, without holding her. Her sobbing breath slowly calms down, mirroring his, while she places her cheek on his warm chest. As an anchor, the thumb on her neck traces small circles there. It takes a few more minutes for her to realize he’s rocking her, right up against him, while humming quietly. The gleam of the end of the day—so slow to change in the Fade—draws some bright shapes on the monsterhunter’s face and nose, that Kallian observes from below her swollen lids and lashes saturated with tears. She suddenly dreams of soaking her numb fingers in this golden sun, to feel something more than this lingering cold. However, even the sun is cold in the Fade ; a splendid shining light that warms no soul. “Everything’s alright.” Dav whispers, pressing his nose on her temple, his breathing warm and alive. “I’m here. Breathe.” It’s probably not the first time he uses these very same words, tonight, but it’s only now she manages to understand their meaning. There is no human-faced demon lurking in the lit room; only sculptures and bones maybe a tad seedy, but it will do her no harm. Assan, against her side. Davrin, close to her. Kallian finally feels able to nod.

Original - FR

La sensation reste collée à elle même une fois qu’elle a émergé. Dans sa gorge, son souffle s’étrangle lui-même, râpeux et tranchant. Elle sent le verre pilé qui court sous sa peau comme autant d’insectes nauséabonds, qui grattent et grattent jusqu’à lui donner envie de l’arracher. Là sur son cou, des crocs plantés ; ici sur ses jambes, qu’elle secoue pour faire fuir les fantômes qui la retiennent ; et-… Les tremblements qui la secouent sont si violents que ses muscles lui font mal. À côté, on bouge ; Davrin se rapproche lentement, touche sa main irréelle, et il parle. Ses mots semblent lointains derrière le brouhaha dans sa tête et son coeur qui tambourine à ses oreilles. Bientôt, elle comprend qu’elle est au Phare. Assan, qui les avait visiblement déjà rejoints sur le lit, se blottit contre elle en la poussant suffisamment pour qu’elle accepte, sans trop réfléchir, de s’appuyer sur l’autre garde. Les plumes contre sa peau fiévreuse et la main ferme de Davrin, juste posée là, en-dessous de sa nuque, sans la tenir ; sa respiration hoquetante se calme lentement, se calquant sur la sienne, alors qu’elle pose sa joue contre sa poitrine chaude. Comme une ancre, le pouce sur sa nuque y trace de petits cercles. Il lui faut plusieurs minutes supplémentaires pour remarquer qu’il la berce, tout contre lui, en chantonnant à voix basse. La lueur de fin du jour — si lente à évoluer, dans l’Immatériel — découpe des formes lumineuses sur le visage et le nez du chasseur de monstres, que Kallian observe derrière ses paupières gonflées et ses cils gorgés de larmes. Elle rêve soudain de pouvoir tremper ses doigts gourds dans ce soleil doré. Mais dans l’Immatériel, même le soleil est froid ; une lumière splendide qui éclaire, mais qui ne réchauffe pas une âme. —Tout va bien, chuchote Dav en appuyant son nez contre sa tempe, le souffle chaud et vivant. Je suis là. Respire. Ce n’est sûrement pas la première fois qu’il prononce ces mots, ce soir, mais ce n’est que maintenant qu’elle parvient à les comprendre. Il n’y a pas de démon à visage humain tapi dans la pièce éclairée ; seulement des sculptures et des ossements un peu glauques, mais qui ne lui feront pas de mal. Assan, contre son flanc. Davrin, tout contre elle. Kallian se sent enfin en mesure d’acquiescer.

[randomalistic]

It has occurred to me I do not have an intro post.

——————————————

HI :] My name is Random and this is my main blog! (multifandom)

Bsky (active) / Twitter (inactive)

21 yo 🦜They/it/she 🍓Demigirl + Acespec Lesbian 🏳️‍🌈 ADHD

🇺🇸 <- Not a fan of this (I live here)

☆ My Artfight! (Very new to it, follow me so i can discover your fellas...)

☆ See #My Videos for YouTube videos I've uploaded :]

☆ Recent hyperfixations:

Deltarune (mostly Tenna/Spamton)

Wreck-it Ralph (2012) tagged #wir, #wir video (sideblog: king-crawler)

The Great Mouse Detective (1986) tagged #tgmd, #gay rats

Transformers One (2024) tagged #tfone #gay bots #tf #transfotmers // maybe idk I’M NEW THIS FANDOM

Navigation ————————

🎨 Art Tag - most art is on fixation sideblogs but I post here sometimes

🦜Sona Tag

txt - My post tag (most of them)

Age 16+ reccomended- posts are sometimes suggestive (but only for the sillies.)

——————————————————

Bigots and TERFs GTFO!!!! 🥳 Other than that uhhh no DNI list but I do block for my own sake. Basically just use kindness & common sense and don't be a jerk ❤️ I don't car

btw i am the biggest introvert ever and my social battery gets drained easily. So if i don't respond to any messages / asks it's probably not personal. thank u for understanding ^w^

INTERESTS————

General: Birds/Ornithology ♡ Animated movies / shows, media analysis & filmmaking, Art (all of it), ecology/biology, most nintendo games, compelling sci-fi & horror

——————————————

Media I enjoy / am knowledgeable of:

UNDERTALE/deltarune, JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure, Doctor Who, FNAF, Steven Universe, Yume Nikki, SPORE, Wobbledogs, Omori, BOTW/TOTK, Mario Galaxy Games (you get the idea).

Creators: Vinesauce, Jerma, freaks like that

——————————————————

Some favorites from each:

——————————————————

Music: I like electronic music I find on YouTube!

I listen to a lot of music by Halley Labs/Lapfox Trax. I also like Dream Puzzles, Nobonoko, C418, etc. Also stuff like Tally Hall and Lemon Demon but I’m sure you knew that just by looking at me

☆ Favorite Album: The Quick Brown Fox - NERVES ENDING

——————————————————

🤓 CRINGE CORNER:

I’m a furry and a selfshipper lmao

——————————————————

🦜SONAS:

The silly little red parrot.

The parrot is free to draw, just be respectful with its depiction (no NSFW or bigotry)

I also have a WIP raptor sona, which is currently a private design. But just know I'm a dinosaur in my heart ❤️ΘΔ

☆ KIN LIST:

Kinning isn’t a super serious thing for me, but a few characters personally resonate with me a lot. AKA brooooo this is literally meeee

My sonas

Jevil

The Quick Brown Fox

Wow I thought there were more than that

NEXT.

♡ F/O LIST

These fixations last anywhere from 4 months - 2 years so I don’t have a lot of them lol

Jolyne Cujoh 🌊🧵💚(my only normal crush)

Spamton NEO 💸🎢💖(fav. my wife.)

TURBO??? (it’s complicated ..?)

I have 2 dedicated fandom/selfship blogs also!

(Bigshotspambot) (King-Crawler)

♡ Thanks for reading! I hope this helped give u an idea of who I am :]