#especially just trying to draw without tracing or working off a prior base

[imthepunchlord]

Why can't I just immediately unlock a skill and be good at it? What do you mean I got to work at?

[delatoid]

Are there parts of anatomy you struggle with?

Short Answer: If they count: proportions, hands, feet, "masculine" faces Long Answer:

Proportions

So my main thing I think is proportions. I tend to default to one "height" which I basically think of as just my height (5'3" / 160cm) and that's where I base everything off of. A bit quick n rough, but the middle here is the height I tend to most default to. Left and right are other "default" heights I have since it's the easiest for me to visualize it in my head. But ultimately they're still compared to the middle default "me" height when I'm drawing.

Left short height is how based off of Sister of Mine's height and Right tall height is based off of my previous partners lol

Any shorter or taller or anything in between I kinda have to really fiddle with it since it's harder for me to visualize. Default height is easy, since that's mine and I know where my arms/legs/whatever start and end. With the other two, I can basically just imagine them compared to me, but I still have to think harder than I normally would trying to portray those heights. Am I making sense? Idk Idk if this counts but any shorter than the left "short" height (i.e. children) I also don't know much how to portray since to me they end up just looking like Adults with Tiny Bodies like Ye Paintings of Olde

Hands

This is a pretty common one, but I'm a bit picky at this point. I personally think I have a good grasp on hands, but I really don't like sketching out the structure for hands and stuff since it's a lot of sketching, resketching, and fine tuning.

Over time I've developed some hand poses that my brain can kinda just pull up and draw really easily (some examples above). It works better for my simpler pieces, or if I combine it with some obfuscation (props, hair, clothes, w/e) but of course it doesn't really work for my more "high effort" pieces

So what do I do if I want to make better looking hands? Use references, of course! It took me a while to graduate from "artist who thinks references is cheating like tracing" to "artist who knows references are a useful tool", but I'm glad I got there since it's so much easier to structure a hand when you can see how it's supposed to look like!

Some examples here of pieces where I've used pictures of my own hands as reference. No pics of the references themselves, though since I don't really like posting pics of myself (sorry!) A tiny bit related, but for full body stuff I tend to take full reference shots of myself as reference as well, and it's really nice especially for more "involved/dynamic" poses.

Feet

So, the problem isn't "I don't know how to draw feet" since I mostly just use my own references like I do with my hands, but it's more like "how do I render this without it looking like I'm a foot fetishist" If I don't render it like the rest of the piece, it's gonna look weird and incomplete and like I don't know how to draw feet. But I need to be careful since (to me) it's kinda easy to get carried away with details and overrender and it just looks like I like feet a bit too much. So for the most part when I've ended up having to draw feet it was for simpler things where I don't really need to render them much at all. I think the only piece where I've managed to strike a good balance was this Nagumo piece I did a while back.

Actually, fun fact, this was originally sketched like two years prior but I never ended up finishing it until later, and I'm glad I waited since I definitely wouldn't have been able to solve the Rendering Problem back then :L

Masculine Faces

No pictures since this is still a problem I'm kinda embarrassed about it but think like Jojo Character, Kiryu Yakuza, Kenshiro FIst of the North Star, you know the big macho man type face. Since my style tends to be a lot rounder, more "sharp" masculine features like that don't really fit well with how I draw, I think. It also comes down a lot to their eyes, which I think I struggle with the most too.

[oligbia]

Heels Over Head

Izuku MidoriyaXReader SFW, Fluff

Midoriya tightened his glare, brows furrowed, green hair falling into his face. His scowl turned into a smile, determination seeping from his skin in the form of beads of sweat. He was not going to lose. His arms were purple, bones broken from overdoing his somewhat new quirk.

You flung yourself upwards again, your quirk launching you high into the hair. You quickly started a decent, nose-diving at rapid speed to Midoriya. You knew he was better suited to use his arms at this point in training, he wouldn't be able to reach you this high. You began to rotate your body, coming down on him with your fist extended like a screw gun onto a board.

You struck him in the head, sending him flying back. His limp body skidded off of the fighting circle, and he showed no sign of getting up. You flung forward yourself, still unsure of the best way to land after falling from such a tall height. You hit the ground with a large 'oof'. You were pretty sure you heard your ankle break, or at least get a pretty gnarly fracture.

You heard Present Mic announce you as the round's winner, but you were struggling to get up and bask in your victory yourself. You may have won your round of the Sports Festival, but you weren't sure you could make another. You finally found the strength to get up, your weight visibly shifted off your damaged ankle. A classmate rushed over to you, and you draped an arm over their shoulder and shifted your weight onto them. You watched as they loaded an unconscious Midoriya onto a stretcher and wheeled him to an infirmary.

Your classmate droned on and on about the Sports Festival, your win over Midoriya, and needing to make sure you can compete next round to 'do your class justice.' But, honestly, you were more worried about Midoriya. You hadn't met him prior to today, but you still felt guilty. Your goal was to beat him- not make him unconscious. He was a fair oppinant, he gave you a run for your money. He had a lead on you for a while, but once he started to break his bones his restraint became his downfall. You took that chance to take a few hard blows to him, landing you where you are now.

You and your classmate stumbled into the infirmary, and they dropped you into a chair to wait. You hadn't had a chance to look at your ankle yet, but in the chair you did. It was bruised all around your foot, the purple and yellow hues almost looking black at points. Both ankles were swollen, but the bruised one was two or three times the size of the other.  

You heard a few final remarks faintly from Recovery Girl, something about taking time to rest and a concussion. You weren't able to see her, but from the sounds of her voice she was behind a curtain on the other end of the infirmary. You watched as she wandered over to you, her tiny legs shuffling under her.

“You’re the young girl who fought Young Midoriya. Good fight…” She survives your ankle, “...nasty results.” She pokes at your bruised ankle, you grimace with pain. A strong throbbing pain shot through your foot. “This one is definitely broken, but lucky for you young lady, the other is just sprained. Nothing I can’t fix for you, deary.”

You watched curiously as she placed a long kiss on your broken ankle, but you didn’t notice any immediate changes.

“It should be better after a half hour or so, in the meantime I will wrap up your other ankle. You should be fine to compete later if you want.”

You smiled and thanked her. She worked on wrapping up the sprained ankle, some of the pressure already relieving. Almost on cue after finishing, she received a call to go to the arena to care for a student on sight- something about the explosive kid from 1-A and a girl he took down. She told you that you were welcomed to stay until you could see yourself out and offered you a pair of crutches before she scurried away.

You sat in silence for a while before you heard faint mumbling coming from behind the curtain. Curiosity got the better of you, and you got up on the crutches, wandering over to the curtain. You drew it back a little, peaking your head behind it.

Midoriya sat propped up in bed, his gym uniform a little torn and twisted up, exposing his bruised abdomen. His arms were wrapped up, but less purple. It was a safe bet that Recovery Girl gave him the same treatment that you had received. His left eye had a pretty bad bruise, making his already dark iris seem even darker. He was scribbling into a notebook, mumbling to himself. You cleared your throat and his eyes shot up to meet yours.

His eyes widened and he quickly closed his notebook, shoving it to the side and trying to move it out of sight. “Ah! I’m so sorry, I probably was being loud!” His voice was frantic and he stumbled over his words.

You peered over to his side. “What were you doing?”

“I was taking notes. I write about different things I think can make me a good hero.”

You nodded. “I’m sorry I beat you up real bad…”

He smiled, his posture relaxing some. “It’s alright. I’ve seen worse.” He lifts his arms up. “I break these pretty often, actually.” He chuckles a little. You looked at him awkwardly, unsure of the joke.

“You had me beat for a while. I wasn’t sure I would win. I’m no good at distanced combat.”

He looked down at your ankles, noticing their state. “Well, your quirk is based on your feet, right? Actually, I have some questions about that…” he pulled out his notebook again. He started flipping through pages of it quickly. You sat down at the edge of the bed, square with his torso. Midoriya, not aware of your presence, began to ramble on about different strategies he had noticed about your quirk. You didn’t have a complex quirk by any means. Your feet had invisible springs, allowing you to jump to incredible heights. It had it’s limitations like everyone else’s. You watched his face, eyes constantly drawing to the large bruise over his eye and the gash on his lip that had been caked over with dried blood. Without thinking much about it, you pulled the wet rag from the bedside table next to Midoriya and gently patted at his lip, trying to clean off some of the blood.

Shivers traveled down Midoriya’s spine at the feeling of the cool washcloth patting gently on his bottom lip. He stopped his thoughts abruptly, looking up at you. Your eyes were focused on his lip, unable to meet his. His pupils grew in shock at your care, especially considering you had just kicked his ass and you had another fight later.

Noticing his silence, you filled in some blanks for him, still dabbing his bottom lip. “My quirk is essentially large invisible springs on the bottoms of my feet. But, like springs, you can't constantly jump high. You have to get a handful of small jumps before a big one. It’s almost like a trampoline, I guess.”

Your eyes finally meet his, and you give him a quick smile. His eyes trace your face, trying to memorize every detail of it. He thought you were quite cute, he was particularly fond of the way your hair was still messy from the fight and the way your eyes seemed to hold an extra layer of determination behind them. He watched as you placed the rag next to you and ran a finger along his cheekbone, caressing the bruise covering his eye.

“Your eye is really swollen, I’m sorry about that too…”

“No! No, no it’s alright. It was an honor to get kicked in the head by you, L/N.” His voice cracked at the beginning, your intimate gesture taking him by surprise. You laughed a little, moving your hand off his face. “Whatever you say, Midoriya.”

He watched as you stood up, taking the crutches under your arms. “I have another fight with some kid from your class- Tokoyami, I think. Anyways, I don’t expect to beat him. My quirk isn’t any match for that shadow thing he has.”

Midoriya smiled, “Well, at least you can say you beat the problem child.”

You shook your head and smiled, grabbing the notebook from his chest. Before he could start panicking and asking for it back, you flipped to the page with a drawing of you and notes about your quirk. You scribbled out your number for him.

“Call me sometime, problem child.”

[ladyfawkes]

[I know what you're thinking -- and the answer is NOPE. THIS IS NOT A REPOST. THIS IS THE ACTUAL THIRD UPDATE (count 'em, THREE!!) in less than a month!! WOOPAH!!!] Tangled Just Before Ever After Chapter 4: Down the Hatch Current word count: 10103 Chapter 4 Summary: How in the world does Eugene answer Rapunzel's question??? Can the author manage to eek out yet another chapter from within the Tower??? WILL OUR COUPLE EVER GET BACK TO CORONA?!? S0ooOoo MANY qUeStiONs!!11!!

Eugene gulped hard several times; the silence stretched a bit too thin between his forthcoming answer and Rapunzel’s question. Eugene could feel that old standby instinct of wanting to lie through his teeth threatening to take over. But this was Rapunzel before him…. And this much he’d learned by now; if an honest woman confronts you about your past hookups, you should level with her. Though Eugene would've told Rapunzel whatever she wished to know, no matter when she chose to ask. After he’d been exploited for so many years by the likes of Stalyan and the Baron, Eugene had reached a breaking point fairly early on where he couldn’t bring himself to seduce the innocent anymore. He’d never liked doing that in the first place since it made him feel cheap, sleazy, and just all-out gross. Even grifters had to draw the line somewhere. It was yet another reason why he’d left Stalyan.

Eugene also knew that if he had to start running interference regarding his past during his first day as Eugene Fitzherbert the gentleman ….then he’d have to keep lying forever afterward….just like Flynn had. And Eugene was simply tired -- no, exhausted -- from all of the running, running, running. Flynn Rider had been on the move ever since he ditched the orphanage before his 10th year all those years ago. No more running, Eugene resolved. Even if leveling with the princess means she wants me out of the picture, so be it. She deserves to hear the truth from the source.

“Rapunzel….” Eugene began delicately, “the short answer to your question -- I’m sorry to say -- is far too many. But I’m requesting that we put a bookmark in that answer; we’ll circle back around to finish it.” Eugene nearly lost his nerve to continue after seeing the crestfallen look in Rapunzel’s eyes. He instead busied himself by locating the ring-shaped pull embedded in the trapdoor of the floor. After tugging on it, he noticed it wouldn’t budge. Without prompting, Rapunzel volunteered further information, explaining how when the princess was still little, Gothel always made her go up to the loft before she opened the trapdoor for her trips away. The crone never wanted the girl to figure out how to operate it. Thus Rapunzel said, “But you’re good at finding your way out of places. I figured you could make the mechanism work -- even without having seen Gothel’s trick to unlatching it.”

No sooner had Rapunzel said the word “unlatching” when a sharp click-THUNK issued from the floor. “Found it,” announced a smirking Eugene, as he moved the toe of his boot off of the otherwise camouflaged mechanism. He couldn’t help feeling a little smug after having effectively outthought that diabolical dead woman….again. The young man repositioned himself to again tug the metal ring and sure enough, the trapdoor swung open this time.

“After you,” said Eugene, gallantly gesturing Rapunzel down the next set of stairs.

“If only I had met you sooner,” Rapunzel said wistfully, as she shook her head. She’d tried to find that hidden mechanism in the floor for years. Eugene had discovered and figured out how to disarm it in mere seconds.

Eugene could not help his contrite chuckle. “Rapunzel, if we had met sooner -- even one year earlier, I doubt I ever could’ve left this place the first time. But it would’ve been for an entirely different reason.”

“Oh, yeah?” Rapunzel challenged, an unexpected edge to her voice. She folded her arms and demanded, “And what’s that?”

“Well, for starters,” said Eugene, his voice becoming far more subdued, “you never would’ve reached the fateful decision to enter a trust agreement with the kingdom’s most disreputable scoundrel. I mean….how could you?” Eugene pondered softly. “Especially based on the faulty info you’d been given about the world in general, you wouldn’t have had a reason yet to take the chance on our deal. Gothel’s control freakishness….hadn’t yet pushed you to the brink. Instead, she would’ve come home, you would’ve had no choice but to tell her that you’d caught me breaking in, and….well….”

“Don’t say that,” Rapunzel abruptly cut him off, abandoning her walk down the stairs, instead rushing over to grab Eugene’s free hand. “Don’t you ever say that,” she admonished, eyes wide. “Even if you had remained a perfect rogue stranger to me, Eugene Fitzherbert, I never would’ve wanted that old crone to hurt you on purpose. And especially not like... this,” finished Rapunzel, once more stretching her palm and pressing it against the jagged bloody tear in his doublet. A renewed ember of hope sparked inside him. And before he knew it, Rapunzel was apologizing, of all things!

“I….I’m sorry I put you on the spot that way regarding, ah, any prior relationships. It wasn’t fair of me to throw something like that on you so suddenly.” Meekness overtook Rapunzel and she looked at the floor, absently tracing out an invisible half-circle with her big toe. “Besides,” she confessed, “I only did it to distract you from my own awkwardness. But….but you kept…..insisting I should tell you what was bothering me since you are trustworthy.” Eugene was swift and carefully set the trapdoor down with the hinge open outward. He also briefly removed and set down his satchel.

The anxious young man went directly to Rapunzel with open arms but halfway through the motion thought that perhaps he shouldn’t, because Eugene didn’t want her to feel obligated to reciprocate. So the keyed-up man kept his fingers curled into his palms rather than reach out, and he kept his arms from raising above waist height. He was half-frozen, trying earnestly not to telegraph what he truly wished to do.

Eugene’s own thumbs must’ve betrayed him, though, as they involuntarily flexed, splaying outward from his balled fists. Rapunzel approached him and briefly gazed into his eyes with a hint of smile behind her own. She proceeded to lean over and take each of his hands, in turn, and tenderly kiss each errant thumb, in turn. Yet any embarrassment Eugene felt over her keen perception would soon melt away. For the princess took his left wrist and placed his arm over her right shoulder, took his right wrist and guided his arm around her waist, and then she mirrored the gesture with her own arms around him. The pair had briefly stopped their world to oh-so-carefully melt deeply into each other. After some time, they briefly broke their embrace. Rapunzel drew her arms in and criss-crossed her upper body with them, tucking in right up against Eugene’s chest. This allowed the sweet young man to attentively draw the princess into himself so tightly, nearly tight enough for him to wrap his arms around her twice as he buried his entire face into her silken hair. Each time they embraced….Eugene was simply floored with just how perfectly they “fit” one another; she could nestle comfortably and flush against his own shape, creating a head-to-toe highway of warmth and love.

Eventually, contented humming issued from Rapunzel’s throat. “I’ve never felt this safe before,” she murmured in awe, her face still pillowed against Eugene’s chest. “Nobody’s ever held me like this before either.” This realization had moved the princess to tears. Eugene leisurely placed a ring of popcorn kisses around the crown of her head in effort to soothe. “Dearest Sunshine of mine,’ he whispered into her hair, “I can promise you there’s so much more where that came from…..” and he was able to draw her imperceptibly closer into himself.

Soon moisture pricked the corners of his own eyes, for Eugene had a similar epiphany to Rapunzel’s. In all his years of relative isolation on the run, Rider never once allowed himself to partake in anything on this type of intimacy level. He’d always been keen to its existence, though. And he knew it was so much deeper and more meaningful than sex. And being the secretly sensitive person Eugene was, it was something he furtively craved but couldn’t bring himself to put that type of expectation upon another human being, knowing the unfavorable lifestyle he led.

And here this fractured thief managed to get caught up within a perfect healing ray of sunlight….and she was willing to take him on along with all his demons, even without knowing the full story in advance. And boy, did he ever have more than his fair share of demons. In spite of himself, Eugene had to say it again. “Sunshine…..I don’t deserve you.”

He immediately heard a tiny huff of impatience from her. “Eugeeeeeene,” Rapunzel overemphasized with mild vexation, “deserving or not, I’ve chosen you. You are forever my new dream. So….so start acting like it….please?” she implored, gazing at him with wide-open concerned eyes. Even her pep talk to him had proven about as rough and tumble as dandelion fluff.

“For you, Sunshine.” Eugene caressed her cheek. “It’ll be a struggle for awhile….but I will no longer speak of ‘deserving to have you.’ I shall instead focus on ‘building new dreams with you’.”

“Thank you,” Rapunzel said gratefully. “It….just….hurts me to see you thinking so much less of yourself due to circumstances now beyond your control.” She slipped her hand into Eugene’s own. And it was that moment he finally found an opening to finish what he started.

“Circling back to the bookmark in our conversation…. Rapunzel…. Ever since the first time you chose to address me as Eugene, everything...the past few days...has been unlike anything I’ve ever felt or experienced with any woman before. It’s all new….all of it. So many firsts already. Nonetheless, you still have every right to ask me about whomever I’ve been with prior to when we met. And while I do intend to eventually tell you about those encounters -- if that’s what you want -- you should also be aware that for me, Eugene Fitzherbert, it’s still a little too soon to openly discuss much of anything just yet. But I will try for your sake, if that’s what you need.” He briefly bowed his head, his eyelids automatically sliding shut.

Rapunzel was so fleet-footed that Eugene had not heard her change positions to where she grabbed his satchel, immediately encouraged Eugene to open his eyes and to help a struggling Pascal who was now lugging a forgotten cast-iron frying pan, and she started down the steps at long last. That was….abrupt, Eugene thought to himself. If Rapunzel was perpetually so talented at keeping him on his toes, then he’d best get himself some better boots -- and soon!

“You okay?” asked Eugene, just to make sure. He grabbed the brass ring of the trapdoor and just before he closed it…..he looked around the Tower one last time. He knew that he should feel the most ominous and terrified that he’d ever felt, especially upon glimpsing his own bloodstain on the floor. But something…..someone was protecting him. And even though he was neither superstitious nor believed in ghosts, once in awhile he would privately allow himself the indulgence of conjuring up invented people and imagery from his past. Fleetingly an image of who could only be his mother comes to mind; it was her spirit that must’ve been shielding him from the worst of today’s trauma, he decided. Thank you, he mouths the words to a seemingly empty Tower, pulling the trapdoor tight shut forever.....

“I’m more than okay,” Rapunzel replied enthusiastically, as she made her way down the dingy spiral staircase. “Who cares about past relationships when you can tell me about all of those firsts you just mentioned instead?”

Eugene almost -- almost -- laughed aloud with relief. Here he had been so worried about past relationship questions when Rapunzel instead wanted to be told all about the present. Three days, and this was the only thing he’d come across so far in which Rapunzel was anything like any other woman he’d met. And Eugene was more than happy to indulge her need to know just how special she had become to him and why.

A/N: I hate to do this (haven't done it here before) but I'm getting next to NO feedback and the same goes for reblogs. If you enjoy my writing, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE -- even if you write no review--reblog this?? It's the only way this story goes out anywhere. It's an author's life blood. You all know how isolating and ridiculous tumblr's stupid search algorithm is.....

[imaginedhaven]

Rules of Engagement: Chapter Four

Link to Masterpost

Late at night on the eve of the princess’ twentieth birthday, Celaena Sardothien slipped into the alleys of Orynth once more. She had been avoiding the streets at night of late after her run-in with the Fae warrior the last time she had slipped out, but she couldn’t wait until he decided to leave town. She had to act, lest the trail grow cold again.

This time, rather than moving through the alleyways, she was crawling over the roofs of the city to reach her destination. After her previous visit to the warehouse, she was taking no chances. Besides, the guards were so focused on the roads and alleys that as long as she kept relatively close to the surfaces to which she clung she actually had a greater chance of passing unnoticed.

Finally she reached the roof of the warehouse, and tugged on the hood of her cloak to make sure her face remained concealed as she glanced around to make sure she hadn’t been followed. A hawk watching from the roof across the alley was her only companion, and she was about to slip down to the alley below when she froze.

Hawks didn’t hunt this late at night. It was him.

With a fierce glare in the hawk’s direction she gestured down into the alley before climbing down herself. A twitch of her own cloak hid the soft glow of the Fae male’s shift from anyone who was nearby. “What are you doing?” she hissed. “If you’re trying to get me killed, I guarantee there are easier ways.”

Her glare was met with a cold smirk. “I only wished to see what could draw you from the p—”

Quickly, she leapt forward and cut him off with a hand over his mouth. “Not. Here.”

Celaena hissed as the male bit her hand in reply. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t call the guard,” he growled.

Pretending she was taking a moment to think, Celaena glanced into the window of the warehouse. The room that had once served as the spy’s office was empty. Abandoned. She had stayed away too long, and it was all this male’s rutting fault. Not only had he ruined her hunt tonight, he was threatening to end it forever. There was only one move left to make.

“Come with me,” she said, “and I’ll tell you everything.”

The male lifted a single eyebrow. “You expect to be able to sneak back into the palace like that, tonight of all nights,” he deadpanned.

“I’ve snuck into far more difficult places, for your information,” she replied breezily. “But no. We’re not going to the palace. You’ll have to trust me, as I’m choosing to trust you.” She wasn’t, of course, but she thought it sounded nice enough.

Before he could respond to her she was clambering back up to the roof, forcing him to either follow her or end the conversation. As she hauled herself onto the roof she looked to her left and saw that he had already hoisted himself up effortlessly, and she growled quietly at the reminder of his superior speed, strength, and dexterity. “This way. Stay low.”

His amused reply was quiet and yet full of unvoiced laughter. “This would be so much easier if you would just—”

“Hush,” she snarled as she led them toward the outskirts of the city. “Later.”

Mercifully, the male remained silent until they reached their destination.

Though it had been untouched since that day almost two years prior, she still paid for the apartment on the outskirts of town that she had once shared. It would be safe enough for her purposes, though the surroundings would make her explanation that much harder.

A quick check around the perimeter revealed that, as she had expected, no one had been near the apartment in weeks. She quickly ushered the warrior into the apartment and closed the door, only then pulling back the hood of her cloak. “I’m sure you have questions,” she said smoothly. “Before you begin, you should know that there’s only so much it’s safe to discuss, even here.”

“My question,” the male sneered as he lifted his own hood to reveal his now-cropped silver hair, “is how a sheltered little princess such as yourself came to be sneaking around your own city, Aelin.”

She hissed at him. “My name is Celaena, and for as long as we’re here you won’t call me anything else. Am I clear?”

Rowan—for the cat was decidedly out of the bag now, she might as well acknowledge the warrior’s identity—smirked in reply as he crossed his arms in front of that impossibly broad chest. “Perhaps you should explain yourself first. Then I’ll decide what I’m going to do with you.”

Rather than reply immediately, Celaena took a moment to hang her cloak and inspect her surroundings. The apartment was exactly as she had left it, though it was significantly more dusty from disuse. A small desk in the corner still had paper left out from where Sam had written his final report to the master he had tried so desperately to escape. She had taken her own clothes from the dresser, but if she opened it she knew his clothes would be exactly as they had been when she had unpacked them herself, abandoning the last traces of the journey they would never take.

She had placed a simple rug by the bed, but if she lifted it she knew the floor would still be stained from where he had breathed his last.

It had been a bad idea to come here, she realized. But as difficult as it would be, it was still safer than revealing any of this information within the palace walls. If any of this were heard by the wrong ears…

Better not to think about that. Instead, she took one more moment to gather her thoughts and then turned to face the male she had brought into what had once been a second home to her. With a deep breath, she began.

“His name was Sam.”

~*~*~

Aelin had intended to only summarize her time as Celaena Sardothien. To provide just enough detail to make Rowan less likely to hand her over to her own guard, without leaving her open to his probable derision and scorn. But the location must have gotten to her, or perhaps she was aching to fill the void he had called attention to after their last fight, for she quickly realized she was telling him everything.

She spoke of how as a girl of sixteen, headstrong and rebellious, she had slipped away from her guards and into the city. How she had run into a boy there, tall and strong with dark hair and beautiful brown eyes. A merchant’s son, he had said at first, there on business from Adarlan. He had recognized her immediately, of course, and hadn’t thought much of her either at their first meeting.

She told Rowan about their second meeting, how she had snuck away to see the boy again and witnessed him killing his target. How he had frozen, fully expecting her to call the guard but unwilling to have the blood of a princess on his hands. But she hadn’t called the guard. No, she helped him clean up after himself instead, saving her questions until the scene was safe.

He had confessed everything, then. What he actually did, and who he worked for. He had clearly expected her to be scared off, had been packing his things as he told her. What he had not expected was for her to kiss his cheek and ask him to teach her his craft, in case she ever needed to protect herself.

She spoke of training with Sam, how he had taught her to use a knife, how she kept her skills sharp by drilling with her most trusted guardsmen when she had the chance. She spoke of walking the streets at night with Sam learning how to trace a man’s movements without being seen, how to watch her own back as well as his. She spoke of how he had helped her create a new identity, Celaena Sardothien, who could walk about town with him.

She spoke of kissing Sam for the first time, just a week after her seventeenth birthday. She told Rowan how startled he had been, how he had sent her away and lost himself in the city for a full week before she could find him again. How she had finally worn down all of his excuses and arguments until he kissed her back.

She spoke until her voice was hoarse, telling him of their plans to run away together shortly after she turned eighteen, to find a place where she wasn’t Princess Aelin Ashryver Galathynius and he wasn’t bound to the King of Assassins in Adarlan. She told him how they had quietly packed their things, preparing to leave in the middle of the night once he finished his last job.

Finally, she reached the hardest part of her tale, and she took a shuddering breath before pulling back the carpet beside the bed. “I came here the night we were supposed to leave together,” she continued. “When I got here, the door was left open and I heard two men arguing. Neither of them sounded like Sam, or anyone he’d had dealings with before. I made a sound, like I was on my way home to one of the other apartments, and I heard them leave through the window. When I was sure it was safe, I came in. Sam was…”

Her voice gave out then, and she traced a fingertip along the edge of the stain on the floor. Rowan was blessedly silent, as he had been throughout her tale, and it gave her a moment to compose herself. “He can’t have been dead long, if the men were still here when I arrived. But there was nothing anyone could do by the time I found him. I… almost lost control that night,” she admitted. “It would’ve been quite the story, I suppose, since there was no reason for me to be here in the first place. But I didn’t. I couldn’t, not if I was going to find who did this to him.”

“Is this why you’ve been slipping out at night?” Rowan asked, voice quiet.

Aelin nodded. “I found the two men quickly enough. They were just grunts, ordered to do a job based on the reports of a spy. I’ve been trailing the spy ever since. I need proof of who gave the order before I can act, because if I’m right… if I’m right it was his former employer, and it would upset the balance of the underworld in Adarlan. Especially if it came out that Celaena Sardothien is just a name, nothing more.”

With one more glance at the old stains on the floor, Aelin covered them again with the rug before standing once more and stepping back. “Sam was possibly my worst mistake,” she admitted quietly. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about it. I was willing to leave my duty to my country and my people, all for a boy who killed people for a living. If it ever came out I’m not sure Darrow would ever let me near the throne. He’d cast me away for abandoning my people. Maybe rightly so. But I don’t regret what I did, not any of it. Because of him, I’m more committed than ever to doing what I must for Terrasen. I learned how to do what must be done, and I learned that love is both a great asset and a profound weakness. Perhaps most importantly, I learned to think before acting, and to make sure that my actions affect the root of my problems rather than the symptoms. It’s a lesson I’m still learning,” she admitted.

When Aelin turned to face Rowan he was silent, pine-green eyes narrowed in thought. He had sat at the desk at some point during her tale, the furniture slightly too small for his tall and broad frame. As she watched, his gaze dropped to his left hand, tracing along the swirls of the tattoo that marked his skin. “So now you know,” she said. “What are you going to do?”

“Nothing,” he replied, looking back up at her.

“Nothing?” she repeated, startled. “Whyever not? What I’ve told you—”

“Is the story of a pain I find all too familiar,” he interrupted, eyes blazing in the dim light.

“I don’t understand,” she admitted as he stood. When his hand went to the ties of his shirt, she lifted her eyebrows. “And I hardly think this is the time—”

The words died on her lips as Rowan’s shirt came off, revealing once more the full design of the tattoo she had only glimpsed in the dim lighting of his rooms before. Artistic renditions of characters in the Old Language cascaded from his left temple and down his face, and the swirling marks she had noted over his shoulder and arm were further characters she couldn’t quite read with her own limited knowledge of the language. “It’s been two hundred three years, ten months, and twenty-eight days since my own actions cost me my mate and the child we would have shared,” he finally revealed. “Her name was Lyria, and these marks tell her story.”

And then it was Aelin’s turn to sit and listen, as Rowan told her a tale of a young male too eager to please his queen and a mate who had begged him to stay. She watched silver line his eyes as he confessed that he was so intent on gaining his queen’s favor that he had marched off to war, failing to scent the life within his mate when he had held her for the last time. He told her how his queen’s enemies had slipped around their ranks, taking a mountain pass that led them by his home, and how he had flown to meet them but arrived too late.

“That’s why you were so upset with me earlier,” she realized. “You didn’t really start in on me until I mentioned the times you left.”

Rowan nodded. “None of this would have happened to her if I’d only stayed when she’d asked it of me. It’s a shame I will carry with me the rest of my life. I… was not myself for a long time, after. I still don’t know if I truly am,” he admitted. “Maybe I never will be again.”

“Perhaps we have more in common than we realized,” Aelin acknowledged. “Sam wasn’t my mate, but… his death changed me, too. For what it’s worth, I don’t think anyone can expect you to be who you were before you lost her. The question you need to ask yourself is whether or not you’re happy with who you are now, and what you can do to try to find peace.”

Rowan snorted. “Wise words, for someone on a quest for revenge. I did the same thing, a long time ago, and I can tell you it won’t bring you the peace you seek.”

Aelin scowled at him. Are you seriously telling me you would have listened to your own advice? she thought.

He shrugged in reply. Probably not, his posture seemed to say. But that doesn’t mean you need to make my mistakes.

They sat in silence for a few moments longer, Aelin finding that she didn’t quite have the words to say to this male who quite possibly understood her better than she could have possibly imagined. She had seen a determination in his gait and a steel-cold glint to his eyes that she had recognized within herself, of course, and she had become more than familiar with the heat of his temper, but to know that this brokenness, these jagged edges of their souls, was yet another thing shared between them? That was an entirely different matter.

Perhaps, she realized as she traced the lines of his tattoo with her eyes once more, no words were required at all. Perhaps they had already bared their souls enough to find, if not peace, at least some measure of understanding.

Perhaps, for now, that was all either of them needed.

~*~*~

As they walked back to the palace, the silence between Rowan and Aelin settled into something more comfortable. The Fae warrior matched her pace effortlessly, silver hair gleaming in the predawn light as they strode through the streets.

By the time they reached the eastern gates the sun had begun to rise, the reddish hues highlighting the gold of her hair and the tan of his skin. “You can take the day off today,” he said quietly. “But don’t think any of this means you’ll have an easy time of it tomorrow. You still need to learn to control your shift, if you hope to survive anything you’re trying to achieve.”

“Why did you follow me tonight?” Aelin asked.

Rowan stopped, and turned to face her. “Curiosity, at first,” he admitted. “After all, what could a princess be sneaking out of her home for that she couldn’t do openly? Especially a princess in a situation such as yourself. Whatever it was had to be risky, and part of my task is to make sure you actually survive your training.”

Aelin snorted. “Somehow I doubt that was part of my aunt’s command to you.”

“It’s implied in being assigned as your trainer.”

“And yet blood oaths don’t leave much room for implications,” she drawled, crossing her arms. “So that means you cared, at least a little.”

“Don’t press your luck,” he growled, though his green eyes were softer than she’d seen them before. “With the distance currently between us, my interpretation of her commands is largely at my discretion as long as I don’t directly violate the command. I take it as a point of personal pride that none of my students have gotten themselves killed while I was training them. It’s more than some can say.”

“If you say so,” Aelin grinned. “But if you ask me—”

“Keep going and you’ll be running twice as far tomorrow,” Rowan interjected, crossing his arms with a smirk. “You would do well to remember who’s in charge here.”

Aelin sighed and leaned against the wall they had stopped beside, inspecting his face as she lost herself in thought for a moment. What will you do now? she wondered. Now that you know what I’ve been up to, will you try to stop me?

Rowan met her gaze. Of course not, he seemed to reply. I don’t think what you’re doing will help you the way you want it to, but I have no reason to stop you.

Aelin blinked, startled by the determination she saw in him. You may not stop me, but are you going to keep following me?

He quirked an eyebrow in response. Of course I am. You’ll get yourself killed if you keep this up, one way or another, and a warrior—even a foreign one—can go where a princess dares not tread.

Aelin was surprised enough by that to speak aloud. “You would help me?” she asked. “Even though you disapprove?”

Rowan grinned, expression as fierce as the hawk he could become. “It’s what I was sent to do. To aid you, to whatever end.”

Before Aelin could respond in any way, Rowan was striding in the direction of the training grounds. She watched him leave in stunned silence, staring after him as he left his cloak by the stables and rolled his shoulders in preparation for training with her guard.

She was still staring at the corner around which he had disappeared when Aedion found her a few minutes later. “I saw Whitethorn drilling with the men,” he said by way of greeting. “He give you the day off after that fight you had the other day?”

Aelin nodded absently, knowing that explanation would be far easier than attempting to explain the truth of the matter to her cousin. “That, and the festivities tonight. It wouldn’t do if I had a black eye on my own birthday, would it?”

Aedion laughed. “While we do have healers, I suppose you’re right. Speaking of your birthday, is there a reason you’re dressed in black? I know we’ll be mourning the loss of your independence soon enough, but you’re not betrothed yet.”

“Are you suggesting that he would have a reason to say no?” she asked breezily as she waved a hand at her own figure. “To this, no less?” As her cousin sputtered in response, she grinned. “I’ll wear something much more celebratory tonight, don’t you fret. I do have a prince to woo, after all.”

“He wanted to meet with you after breakfast,” Aedion remarked, tying back his golden hair in preparation for training with his men. “Prince Dorian, that is. I told him you would likely be training your magic, but feel free to correct me. He was visiting the library, last I heard.”

“I suppose I should make time for literature, as I suddenly find my morning quite open,” she grinned. “I’ll change into something more appropriate and then head to the library myself.” She hadn’t slept, of course, and a short nap sounded far better than even spending time in one of her favorite places, but she had a mission and she was more determined than ever to succeed. “I’ll see you later, cousin?”

“Of course,” he replied before wandering off in the same direction Rowan had.

As Aelin began the long walk back to her own rooms, she couldn’t keep the smile off of her face. Anyone who saw her would simply assume it was because of the impending celebrations for her birthday, but she knew better. In one night, she had drastically improved the working relationship between herself and Rowan, and one day she might even be able to call him a friend. If she could forge a connection between herself and someone as unapproachable as the Fae warrior had been, surely she could convince Prince Dorian that it was in their mutual best interest to wed.

Perhaps everything would work out for the best, after all.

~*~*~

Aelin took a deep breath as she stood before her closet, less than an hour before she was expected to arrive at her own birthday celebration.

She should have been dressed already, most likely, but after a long morning sorting through histories in the library she had rested for longer than she’d intended. And so she stood before her collection of gowns, completely bared, when she should have been putting the final touches on her appearance.

It had been worth it, though. What had started as a light debate had led into searching through the library’s shelves with Prince Dorian for the oldest books and scrolls they could find. She had known, of course, that her kingdom was home to some of the most valued knowledge in existence, but even she hadn’t known just how old some of the works were.

With a small smile for the day’s successes, Aelin returned her attention to her wardrobe. Regent Darrow would likely expect her to show up in something demure, likely in Terrasen’s green and silver. Turquoise and gold to match her eyes would also be on his list of approved selections. But tonight wasn’t about his choices, it was about her own, and so she moved further into her closet and smiled as she found the perfect gown.

As her door opened Aelin grabbed a robe, quickly wrapping it around herself before relaxing at the sound of Lysandra’s voice. “It’s good to see you’re awake, at least,” her friend laughed. “It’s a better start than I was afraid I would get.”

Aelin smiled as she pulled her selected gown out of the closet. “I’m glad your expectations were so low,” she said with a grin. “It means it’ll be easy to impress you.”

Lysandra smiled back as she fully swept into the room, closing the door behind her. She had adopted one of her preferred forms for the evening, Aelin noticed, chestnut curls as perfect as ever and artfully tumbling down her back over a gown the deep burgundy shade of a fine wine. “It’s not me you need to worry about impressing,” she replied, “unless your dear Regent has changed his mind about the qualifications for your suitors.”

“You say that,” Aelin began as she laid out her choice of attire for the evening, “but you know I would never stand in my dear cousin’s way. Has he finally plucked up the nerve to speak to you properly? I know the last time he tried he was looking over his shoulder for days.”

While Aelin would tease Aedion within an inch of his life over his attempts to win Lysandra over, deep down she understood his struggle. Like her, he had Fae blood in his lineage, and while he couldn’t shift forms like Aelin could and he possessed no magic, it had left its mark on him regardless. As with most who had Fae lineage, he was stronger and faster than most humans. She also suspected he possessed the enhanced senses that some spoke of, though Aedion himself had never confirmed this. Most profoundly, though, her cousin apparently had enough Fae blood—or perhaps that part of him was dominant enough—that he had recognized his mate the first time he met Lysandra, the same way Rowan had described the pull toward his now-deceased mate.

While Aedion’s instincts had told him immediately that Lysandra was his mate, as a human Lysandra had no such instincts. While Aelin hadn’t been present for their first proper conversation together, she had heard that her friend had shifted into a ghost leopard and run him off for what Lysandra described as territorial Fae behavior and what Aedion described as perfectly normal conversation. After that, she had informed him in no uncertain terms that mate or no, he would have to earn her trust and affection as anyone else would.

Aelin sighed quietly as she combed through her shortened golden waves. While she absolutely did not envy her cousin the task before him, sometimes she wondered what it would be like to look at someone and just know they were meant to be. It was possible that her own Fae lineage was dilute enough that she would never know. She did know that while she had loved Sam dearly he hadn’t been her mate, not the way Lysandra was Aedion’s and Lyria had been Rowan’s.

Perhaps it was for the best, though. Darrow had shown no signs of budging from his requirement that she marry, and that would only grow complicated if she had an unknown mate to worry about. Her life was complicated enough as it was, she decided. Better to focus on what she could control.

With that in mind, she turned back to Lysandra as her friend finished ranting about whatever Aedion had done that day. “I’m glad you came by,” she said quietly. “I’ll need your help, if I’m going to make the impression I intend to tonight.”

Lysandra’s eyes, today a particularly green shade of hazel, gleamed at the promise of a challenge. “Tell me what you’re looking for.”

As Aelin outlined her plan for the evening, she allowed her mind to wander back to her last shift. She had no intention of asking Rowan to bite her every time she needed to shift, but if she could remember those moments after, when she had recognized the threat and reacted on instinct…

In her mind’s eye Aelin came up to a veil inside herself. A bright light awaited her on the other side, as did the warmth of her flames. She had spent so long shoving this part of herself away, lest the fire burn without her control. It was a risk to let it out tonight, but there were few places safer to show her own strength than at a feast in her own honor. The guest list had been carefully screened by Aedion and his men, and she was positive Rowan would show up at least to say he had put in an appearance. If he deemed it a risk, she knew he would stay and ensure she didn’t burn the entire castle to the ground.

With those reassurances fresh in her mind, Aelin tore a hole through that veil. A flash of light and pain was her reward, but as she felt her features shift she began to smile.

She was Aelin Ashryver Galathynius, Crown Princess of Terrasen and Heir of Fire, and she would not be afraid.

[adangerousbond]

The End is the Beginning

Chapter two

I was sad that there wasn't a new episode, so somehow that turned into a 5k chapter for this story, still may only be a two shot, or more, depending on how my time goes, but I have a bit of an outline for a 3rd chapter already, so that is pretty likely. Are we all doing okay? Did we survive the first week? I am so grateful for all the amazing feedback I go on the first chapter, I appreciate it so much and definitely encourages me to keep writing, so thanks! As usual, written out pretty quickly and on no sleep with no proof reading, so you could be in for anything. 

Read below at ff.net or at AO3

They were onto the third movie before any further interruptions, bar the occasional question here and there from Kora, who seemed just as awed by the improvements made to movie making as Daniel. May had surprised Daisy by being able to answer more questions than she could, and she quickly decided that May was a fan of Disney movies, and somehow, she had never found out about this particular fact until now.

"Alright, at least go pretend to be getting some rest," Coulson told the group as he entered the darkened room, grinning at the scene ahead of him and not quite sure which part was his favourite.

"But Dad," Daisy jokingly complained, gently waking Daniel up nonetheless, the latter blinking away the confusion for a moment, gaining more confusion at the added guests since he was last awake.

Rising up, she could feel the soreness to her muscles, both from her fight and from sitting still for so long; from doing too much and too little, but at least it was a feeling. She caught Coulson's eye, and knew he was holding back some sort of comment or question, but clearly deciding it wasn't the time or place, so she made no move to draw it out, passing by him instead with a soft smile as Daniel followed close behind silently.

"May, a word," Coulson stated as the others were nearly out, evidently wanting to speak to the other agent alone, something that seemed normal enough to everyone accept Kora, who stilled in the hallway, worried the conversation was regarding her.

"Regardless of what they or you decide, they won't kick you out and they won't hand you over to someone else, they don't give up on people," Daisy paused for a moment to ease her sisters concerns, getting a weak smile in return, "I should know that better than anyone here."

Her sister nodded in response, continuing on her way to wherever May had set her up in or just somewhere to clear her head, Daisy wasn't quite sure on the answer, but it didn't seem pressing to know right now, she knew she would be safe and that was all that she needed to know. A hand came to her back, guiding her forward, as she realised that they were still standing in the empty hallway.

Heading back to her room, she felt his hesitation as they neared,

Quiet took over the room quick enough, Daniel falling back asleep easy enough; knowing she was alive and well next to him and that they were safe in the base, making it infinitely easier. A part of her was jealous that he could sleep, the part of her begging for more sleep that was, but mostly, she was just glad that he was able to finally rest, and that maybe it was her turn to watch out over him.

Sitting hunched over reading her tablet, she couldn't help but keep checking that the man asleep next to her was alive and breathing, that he wasn't just a figment of her imagination. She had debated trying to go back to sleep as the time dragged on, but the constant running around in her mind, told her that she wouldn't stand a chance at sleeping.

The humming in her veins and the crawling feeling on her skin, became all too much, she had wanted to clean up for a while, but she knew a shower would wake her body up fully, and while she wasn't sleeping, she still felt like she was resting. Checking her phone, and realising that it was nearly an acceptable time around the base to be up, she decided that she couldn't wait any longer and headed for the shower.

Slipping back into her bunk, she felt as if she had managed to scrub a layer of skin off, but still hadn't quite managed to scrub off the entire feeling of death. Glancing around, she realised that Daniel must have woken and gotten a similar plan as herself, or he had gone looking for her, either way,

"Morning," he greeted warmly as he re-entered the room, looking cleaned and refreshed, telling her he had had the same idea.

"Hmm," she responded absentmindedly, immediately leaning onto his side as he sat beside her.

She didn't quite understand the part of her seeking the contact, seeking his warmth, she had after all, spent most of life pushed aside, without anyone that she trusted would be around long enough for her to reach out for that comfort. But right now, it was about the only thing that made her feel fully alive, that made her forget that she had had died the day prior.

Facing him, she traced her hand along the side of his face, she felt him still slightly at the touch, she could feel his heart beating, she could feel hers beating, reminding her they were alive, reminding her they had won, and that they were here; together. Bringing her lips to his, she started slow, savouring the moment, the calmness to the room that had started her pace, quickly diminishing as she felt a heat rising deep inside, a heat that was working well to chase away the cold memory of space.

Shifting herself so that she was straddling him, she hummed in approval as his hands made there way under her top and started exploring across her skin. She pushed him back down onto the bed, chasing the feeling of alive that their contact seemed to bring, right now she felt so far from death, so far from the feeling of loneliness and disappear that clouded her few memories of floating through space.

A knock at her door broke them apart instantly, him dropping his hands and freezing silently in his position on the bed, as she sat up straight, leaning on her thighs either side of him, waiting to establish who and why the interruption. The annoyance fading as she smirked at his worry about being caught out, but she could see under the worry that he was annoyed at the interruption just as much as she was.

"Sousa, get decent and come give me a hand," Mack's voice rattled through the door, his sure tone holding a hint of amusement as well.

"He'll just be a minute," Daisy responded, grinning the moment that she stopped talking, trying not to laugh, standing up to let the man in question right himself.

Sitting at the bench next to Alya, Daisy listened as the little girl rambled on to her father about the night before, as he listened as if it was the most interesting story he had ever been told. She grinned at her friend, at how good a father he was, he was the type of father that she would have given anything to have had growing up, not that it surprised her, she always knew her friends would make amazing parents one day.

"You cook now?" she asked as he placed a plate of waffles in front of her that actually looked pretty edible.

"Picked up a few things over the years," Fitz explained, head tilted towards the reason with a large smile.

"It's so crazy that it was barely any time for us but years for you's," she mused back, toying with her food for a moment, debating if she could eat or not, the smell winning out and she took a small bite.

"At least it was more than a few hours for you," Flint spoke up as he entered the kitchen, making his way over to join with a hungry look on his face, "got any spare?"

"It went quick, especially once we had this little monkey," Fitz responded to the younger boy, putting a plate together from him as well, twice the size of the other twos.

"I bet," Daisy agreed, managing a couple more mouthfuls of food that her body seemed to accept better than the first, almost as if it needed to be reminded that it did in fact still need nourishment.

"We have so many stories to tell you all, and so many videos to share," Fitz told her, he knew that the team had missed out on so much of his daughters life so far, and that they would all want to know everything, it was something that Jemma had been saddened by, not getting to share it with the rest of their weird family, almost more than their actual blood family.

"How are you settling in?" Daisy asked her sister, dropping down to sit next to her in Zephyr One's cockpit, it had taken her a while to find her, and she realised now, that the plane probably felt like simultaneously like her best bet to escape, and her link to staying, much like she had felt about the Bus.

"So far so good, May has been very helpful," Kora smiled warmly, relaxing slightly at her sister's caring tone, "surprisingly."

"She's good like that, regardless of what she says," Daisy told her, staring out into the base, almost as if searching for the person in question.

"I hope, I hope you don't mind that I'm still here," Kora fidgeted over her words, worried that she had blown her shot, worried that her last link to anyone might be too damaged.

"I don't, honestly," Daisy tried to make her believe her, knowing how much the feeling of being unwanted could eat you up inside.

"I just want the chance to get to know you, to make up for everything I did," her sister explained, not meeting her eye, and she wanted to tell her that she understood, that she had been in similar situations, seeking forgiveness and seeking connection, even when she didn't realise that it was what she was looking at the time.

"You brought me back to life, that's a good start," she told her, choosing to go a simpler route for now, not entirely sure she was up for going to deep into her past just yet, not when she was only really keeping herself together enough to keep moving forward at the moment, "I'm glad you're here."

"Me too, I want to get to know you, really," Kora smiled shyly, although technically the older sister, everything about her showed that in life and in actual years lived, she was the younger of the two, "I never knew any family outside of our mother."

"I never had any family to know," Daisy commented offhandedly, a sadness clouding her tone, and as hard as it had been, she wasn't sure if it was something she would give up her current family for.

"I-I, I wish that you knew the Jiaying that I did," Kora was silent for a moment, not quite sure how to take remark, choosing to stick with honesty if she wanted to get anywhere.

"I got to a little bit, that's more than I thought I would," Daisy told her kindly, she was even more grateful that Daniel had pushed her to talk to her mother, with how things turned out, "but no, I was meaning that I'm happy to get the chance to get to know my sister too."

"Daisy, a minute?" Jemma interrupted as they approached control.

"Sorry, probably more tests," Daisy smiled at her sister apologetically, catching her friends desire to talk alone.

"Is everything okay?" Kora asked, concerned that she had done something wrong when bringing her back to life.

"Yes, yes, everything's fine," Jemma pushed aside the younger woman's concern with a bright smile, practically dragging the other into a nearby empty room.

"What's up?" Daisy questioned her friend, her eyebrows furrowing in confusion over the actions.

"I just wanted to talk to you, about everything, well, mainly about one little, big thing in particular. It's hard, but ultimately it's the right decision, and I just wanted talk it over with you first, I think you'll agree but," Jemma rambled on, skirting around the topic she had cornered her for, clearly not sure how to start.

"Your leaving, aren't you? You, Fitz and Alya are going to your happy ever after, right?" Daisy spoke quietly, saving her friend from herself, she had been expecting it, and truthfully, she got it, but it still stung deep inside.

"Yeah, yeah, how did you guess? Did Fitz say something already?" Jemma paused, surprised, and worried that she had found out some other way.

"You have your serious, sad face on, it was either that or I was dying again, and I was hoping that wasn't it," Daisy explained, smirking to hide the rising emotion that she was trying her hardest to keep down, as much as it hurt, her friends did deserve this more than anything.

"Oh, right, yes, well, we just want Alya to have as normal a life as she can, we don't want to leave, but-," Jemma stated back on the speech that she had prepared earlier, only to be cut off by her friend pulling her in for a tight hug.

"It's the right thing to do for her," Daisy agreed as she pulled back, wiping a stray tear away, "when?"

"That's the thing," Jemma toyed with her words again, and Daisy knew she wouldn't be ready for whatever the answer, "tomorrow."

"But that's, that's so soon?" Daisy stated, she definitely wasn't ready for that.

"We will still help out on things from afar, but we just, we can't keep doing it anymore, and we don't want her at risk more than she already has been," Jemma brushed aside her own tear, knowing that it was right and that her friend would understand, but still upset about the whole thing.

"Hey, no one has seen you in a while," Daniel broke the silence of her bunk, taking her in as he closed the door behind him.

"I just needed some quiet," Daisy stared straight ahead, paying him no attention as he sat next to her on the bed, taking her hand in silent comfort.

"I know it won't be the same, but they'll still be in your life," he told her gently, guessing the reason for her hiding away correctly.

"Will they though? I mean we'll still talk now and then, probably text and email each other for a while, but that will fade and eventually, we'll just be the people who occasionally catch up and barley know who each other is anymore," she responded sadly, a part of her knowing that they would still be in her life, that he was right, but that part was far from the loudest in her mind right now.

"What you have been through together, all of you, that bonds people in ways that even if you don't talk as much as you do now, you will always be close, no matter the physical distance," he tried a different approach, his hand reaching for hers as he watched her closely.

"Ugh, I hate that I'm even mad about it, I know it's the best thing for Alya, but it's," she blinked away a tear as she looked down, almost ashamedly.

"It's bringing up some things," he finished for her, squeezing her hand softly, Mack had warned him that she had been hurt, but he had guessed that she had probably been hurt more than either had even realised.

"I should be used to it by now, everyone always ends up leaving, walking away, dying," she gave him a sad smile, not wanting to drop all the thoughts running through her head on him, but something about his presence, made it hard to stop talking, "this team, they're the only people that have suck by me, and for so long, I guess I got used to it, which is something I've told myself not to do since I was a kid."

"You still have them," his words sure, he mightn't know a lot about the world he lived in now, but one thing he knew for certain was that this team had her back.

"For how long, they're all slowly going to go off to do their own things, live their own lives," she knew she had them, but for how long, how long until it was back to her by herself, trying to pretend she was okay with being lonely, even if she wasn't sure she could even pretend that these days, "hell, even you and Kora, it's only a matter of time before even you two decide there's bigger and better things, less complicated things, out there."

"Kora wants to be in your life, she clearly wants to be just like her big sister, or little sister? Not sure how that works?" he told her honestly, focusing on the easier part of her sentence, before turning more serious, "and me, Daisy, you have me, I'm not going anywhere."

"You can't say that, you were just offering yourself up to stay in a different timeline like yesterday," she fired up, not accepting his words, not when she was terrified both that they were true, and that she might just want to believe them.

"So that you would live," he gave her hand a light squeeze, glad when she didn't pull away, because he had no other answer to give.

"That's not fair," she growled in response, he had been ready to say goodbye to her, to leave her, and even though deep down, she got it, she was still angry at him for it.

"Neither is you killing yourself to save us all, but we would both do it again and we both know it," he reasoned, a little too well for her liking, "I know better to promise that I won't die, though, technically I am already dead, but you've got me, if that's what you want."

"You can't say that, you can't promise that, not when you barely know me, you don't know the horrible things I've done, a lot of which that hasn't been for the greater good," she responded dryly, she wasn't sure she had forgiven herself for a lot of the things she's done, and she was definitely not sure how someone like him would take them.

"You're right, I don't know all of what you've done, but I know –" he started, his voice even and honest.

"-My type?" she guessed, a conversation from a long-ago time loop popping into her mind.

"I know you, or at least the parts you have been prepared to show me," he told her, pausing before gaining the words to continue, needing to make her listen and understand, to believe him, "I know the you that has had my back this whole time, the part that listened to me complain about Hydra and being pulled out of my timeline, the part that joked around with me, the part that managed to put a shard of glass under your skin to get us out of that barn, the part that was prepared to do a Hail Mary into space to save her friends, and the part that even though you've been hurt countless times before, you're still prepared to let me in, if only a little."

Watching him closely, she knew he was giving her a chance to take his words in, letting her decide on her next move, her next issue to raise. Choosing to decide that tomorrow was another issue, that maybe she was setting herself up for more pain, but that maybe, just maybe, that she was actually in for more pain if she pushed him away completely, she kissed him, her tongue slipping into his mouth and deepening the kiss before he had fully caught her decision, pulling herself into his embrace as much as she could once he did.

Responding with the same favour, trying to convey his words now in touch, trying to convince her that he was here for her, that he wasn't going anywhere and that for him, she was enough. He pushed her backwards onto the pillow, his shirt being dragged back over his shoulders before he had even realised that she had undone his buttons.

"Is this when you get all gentleman-y and stop to make sure this is allowed?" she smirked at him as he pulled back, both taking the chance to catch their breath for a moment.

"I was just going to ask if the door locks," he responded, huskier than usual, glancing towards the door for a moment.

"Oh, everyone around here knocks," she told him, not wanting him to get up and lock the door, pulling him back in for another quick kiss, "and if they don't, it's really their own fault."

"But," he started, resting his forehead on hers for a moment, "you are okay with this?"

"Definitely," she flipped them over, both to prove her point and speed up the slow pace that he seemed to be setting, he was relishing in the fact she was alive, whereas she needed to feel alive.

By the time they had redressed and headed to find the others, they had only just made it in time for the last team dinner, a going away of sorts for the Fitzsimmons family. Joining them all quietly at the table, Daisy made especially sure to avoid the smirk she had caught May sending her as they entered, choosing instead to make small talk with Piper, who was more than used to not being caught up on everything.

Midway through a conversation with Jemma and Alya, she realised that Daniel and Fitz were fast becoming friends, as she paused to smile at their animated conversation, she caught the attention of Jemma, the both grinning at the sight. The happiness quickly clouded in sadness as she remembered that the new friendship would be short lived, in this form anyway.

By the end of the dinner, no one was quite ready to leave, quite ready for it to be over, not only because that meant it was closer to Fitz and Jemma leaving, but also because they all knew it was just the start, that soon enough others would start leaving until they all had. This was the start of the end for the team, and no one was quite ready to admit that.

The next morning, they had all managed to stagger their goodbyes with the three, Daisy having waited purposely near the vehicle bay, to ensure that she would get her goodbye, but also, in an attempt to delay it as much as possible. Watching them approach for the last time in an unknown amount of time, she tried to stay as positive to them as possible, knowing that it was the best think for their child and them.

After saying their goodbyes, Fitz took Alya off to the car, leaving the two best friends a moment to each other, whether Jemma had requested it or not, Daisy was thankful for the chance. Hugging each other tightly, they both let the tears run freely, after everything that they had been through together, after every mission, every death, and every memory since they had gotten on that bus as near kids, now they were parting as sisters and they both knew that they would try like anything to keep in as constant contact as they possibly could.

Entering the kitchen after the goodbyes with Flint in tow and ready for her distraction plan, Daisy was glad to see that the two she had requested to meet her there, were sitting waiting, talking politely with each other. She smiled to herself, glad that they were getting along regardless of what had gone down, both trying to make an effort with another person they saw as important in her life.

"I've set these up super basic for you both, I've put my number in as the emergency contact, and I've put everyone's details in too," Daisy informed them, hand an iPhone to the of them both, as Flint placed a box with various needed cords next to them both.

"So, we can call each other wherever we are?" Kora asked, gathering from her limited knowledge, turning the phone over in her hand a few times, as if trying to work out how they work exactly.

"And take photos," Daniel told her, remembering a moment in an alley that brought a smile to his face, regardless of what had come next.

"Really? With this?" Kora asked, the confusion clear, as she worked out at the very least how to make the screen light up, showing Daniel too.

"Oh man, this is worse than I thought it would be," Flint groaned, he had taken to the technology in this time like a fish to water, probably helped by the fact he had come from the future, not the past, and had thought it might be entertaining when Daisy had asked him to help her, but now he wasn't so sure.

"Yes, you can call, video chat, or text from it," Daisy started out simple, grinning at the blank looks she got in response.

"Text?" Kora asked, trying to slide the screen up to get into it, having between the two found the message on the screen telling them too.

"Like an email but quicker and easier," Flint explained further, realising his mistake when neither seemed to understand any better.

"Email?" Daniel sounded more confused than ever, turning his phone asking for a passcode to Daisy.

"Your passwords are your birthyear," she told them with a grin, she had debated letting them choose their own, but then decided that this option was more amusing, and by the chuckle he gave her in response, he understood her reasoning.

"An instant letter to your phone?" Flint tried once again, sitting down in defeat after it didn't help them much more.

"I'll just show you," Daisy stepped in, pulling out her own phone and sending them both a message separately, and then decided to take a photo and send it to them both, creating a group message she was pretty sure she would end up regretting.

"Wow!" Daniel exclaimed, tapping on the notification, and managing to bring up the message screen.

"That's so cool," Kora agreed, playing around for a moment until she worked out how to respond back, the other's phones buzzing with the new message and Daisy knew that she was definitely going to regret that group message.

"Okay, so do you both think you have enough of an idea to at least call one of us?" Daisy questioned the group after a while, receiving apprehensive nods in response.

"Now we move onto social media," Flint stated, receiving a grin from May as she entered the room and caught the end of the sentence.

"No, no we don't," Daisy told him, that was not something the two in training were ready for, and probably not something the world was ready for yet either.

"What's that?" Kora asked, intrigued, as she swiped across the screens looking for something she had missed.

"Facebook, Instagram, snapchat, twitter, TicToc, the question is which one first?" Flint mused, pretending to think hard on the subject.

"None, none first," Daisy shook her head, smirking at May who joined them at the table without a word.

"I could see Kora getting behind TicToc, and you Daniel, I think you're more of an Instagram, or maybe twitter," Flint decided after a moment, grinning at them trying to find an app on their phones matching anything close to what he had mentioned.

"Is that good or bad?" Daniel asked the group, placing his phone down in front of him.

"What's TicToc?" Kora questioned too.

"That is a lesson for another day," Daisy stated, trying to get them to drop it.

"Where's the fun in that," Flint protested, deciding on a middle ground, "can we at least teach them about YouTube?"

"I don't think it is safe to set them loose on the internet with strangers just yet," Daisy laughed, sharing a grin with May on the thought.

"You just don't want them finding out about online shopping and judging your problem," Flint countered, smirking at her as he spoke.

"Online is safer for us," Daisy glared at the teenager, explaining her reasoning.

"Online shopping sounds pretty self-explanatory, and something I could get behind," Kora grinned, enjoying the ease that the afternoon had held with her sister.

"Free shipping is everything," Daisy agreed for a moment, before continuing, "but there's a lot to learn before we get you to that point."

"Yeah, like clickbait, and viruses, scams, oh, can't forget about trolls," Flint added on, accepting that the phone lesson was over for the day and the internet was another day issue.

"Firewalls?" Daniel questioned the word he had heard Daisy say numerous times now while on her computer.

"They're only an issue if you want to do less than legal things," Flint stated, receiving another glare from the only one at the table that really did anything with them.

"And not something you need to know about for a long time," Daisy pointed out after a moment, reaching down into the bag she had brought and placing a tablet in front of them now instead, "anyway, we have these next."

"Why do we need another phone?" Daniel asked honestly, he had yet to see or hear about something that the phone he had couldn't do.

"It's not a phone," Daisy smiled, enjoying this little lesson in technology more than she thought she would.

"It looks just like a bigger phone," Kora stated, turning it over to investigate as she did with the phone.

"That's basically all it is," May shrugged, not helping the situation at hand.

"Just better because it's bigger?" Kora asked, her head tilted like a dog trying to work something out.

"It's not about the size," Daisy told them, the question reminding her of the time Daniel suggested using a bigger computer to hack, complaining her laptop was tiny.

"It's always about the size," Kora grinned in response, gaining a chuckle from May.

"Is that why, you know what, never mind, I don't want to know the answer," Daisy was thrown for a moment at the inuendo from her sister, choosing, finally, just to get back to the topic, "it's a tablet, it's kind of a cross between a phone and a computer."

"What does it do that a phone doesn't?" Kora smiled at her sisters stammering, feeling like it was an actual normal sister moment.

"Nothing really," May piped up, once again not helping the situation, but evidently holding some annoyance to the amount of technology she was forced to use.

"Anyway, these are linked to the S.H.I.E.L.D network, so you can access files, search things or follow current missions, not that there's much on there at the moment," Daisy explained, focusing the group back to the task, "I've programmed it so that you can't accidently delete or change things at all as well."

"So, you put them on read-only mode?" May nodded in approval, "that's a good idea."

"To search is very similar to the phone, just press the little magnifying glass," Daisy started teaching, half the reason she had wanted them to learn to use it was so that she could leave them to their own devices to learn about S.H.I.E.L.D. since their times, and her, if she was being honest, "yep, like that and then type in something, just type my name for now."

"Why does he have more come up than me?" Kora questioned, trying to work out where she had gone wrong.

"His is set to a higher level than yours," Daisy answered nonchalantly.

"Oh," her sister responded, obviously dismayed at the reason, but accepted it, nonetheless.

"Not because we don't trust you or anything, just you've never actually been in S.H.I.E.L.D. or had any training or anything with us, whereas Daniel was the chief at area 51," Daisy explained further realising how she took it, "I figured that gave him a bit higher clearance."

"Does that mean I have higher clearance than you?" Daniel piped up, grinning at her statement.

"Well, she was the fill in director once," May pointed out, shrugging at the information that was old news to her.

"Really?" Daniel asked, initially surprised at the comment, but as he thought about it, it did make sense.

"Not for very long, and it didn't go the best," Daisy laughed, brushing the information aside quickly.

"So, you outrank us all?" Kora questioned, smiling at her sister.

"Don't forget it," Coulson responded for her as he joined them, clearly having come looking for them, "we need to do a supply run."

"Daniel and I'll go in the morning," Daisy offered, jumping at the idea of getting out of the Lighthouse, and getting the chance to introduce Daniel to her time period.

"Can I come too?" Kora asked reservedly, worried for the rejection she might get, "I wouldn't mind getting out of here for a bit, seeing what the world is like now."

"Of course," Daisy agreed instantly, nodded assuredly to her sister.

"I'm coming too," Flint stated, he was always down for a chance to explore, and he figured with two tagalongs from the past, it could make quite the interesting trip.

[selfshipwritingandstuff]

Our First Times: Duman

Another few months passed. Winter turned to spring, and the wizards and I returned to our routine of spending nights camping in forests or by the side of the road.

It was early evening, but we had decided to set up camp already. The spot at the border of a forest, with a nearby stream of fresh, clean water had just seemed to be a good choice. Duman and I were tasked with pitching up the tents, and while I did so, I was suddenly overcome by the unpleasant feeling of being watched. I finished hammering the last tent peg into the ground and got up. Maybe my companions had come back from gathering firewood and getting water from the nearby stream sooner than I expected and had been watching me work. But when I turned around, there was nobody there. I could distantly hear Anagan and Ogron having a cheerful conversation at the stream and Gantlos was still somewhere in the forest, picking up dry sticks and moss for the fire. And Duman… was nowhere to be found.

I bit my lip, looked around nervously and called out:��Duman?“

No answer but for the quiet sound of a twig snapping somewhere between the trees. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up.

Shit. There was… something there, I had no magic, only a small dagger to defend myself with, and the wizards would probably not be here in time to save me if it attacked me.

A pair of red-glowing eyes appeared in the shadows of the undergrowth. My breath hitched in my throat. Time seemed to slow down as that animal, looking like a huge black wolf, leapt at me. Its huge, heavy body collided with mine, knocking the air out of my lungs and throwing me to the ground.

At that point, my survival instincts flared up. I grabbed the dagger from the sheath fastened to my thigh and threw myself around, so I was now on top of the animal, poised to slit its throat. But suddenly it didn‘t seem aggressive anymore. Not at all. It stared at me with wide eyes, it‘s fanged maw wide open in an expression that almost seemed… like it was laughing?

The fangs started retreating back into its jaw, and so did the fur into its skin. The snout became shorter until it was flat and turned into a very familiar hawkish nose. And as soon as Duman had the vocal cords to do it again, he started laughing hysterically.

„Y-you should see your face right now!“

I inhaled sharply. „Not. Funny.“ But my righteous indignation only seemed to amuse him further, causing him to laugh louder. Until I grabbed his shoulders and let myself drop onto him to pin him in place. Then he stopped laughing, his cackling replaced with stunned silence. I realized that this was a very… compromising position, with me holding him down by the shoulders while straddling his hips, but I was too angry to think of the implications.

„So. You thought that it was funny to scare a helpless girl half to death, did you?“

Just a few months ago I wouldn‘t have dreamed to speak to the wizards in that tone.

His surprised expression turned to a smirk. „You don‘t seem so helpless right now. In fact, I believe I am the helpless one right now.“ And he didn‘t seem to mind in the slightest. In fact, there was a gleam in his eyes that I had seen in Ogron‘s and Anagan‘s eyes many times before. And as a few seconds passed, I felt slight movement between my thighs.

„So?“, he asked. „Aren‘t you going to punish me for my little prank?“

I sat up straight. „You know, if you wanted to sleep with me, all you had to do was ask.“

„True, but I had to know if you would be able to be dominant. And just asking you would have been less funny.“

„We‘ll see who gets the last laugh. Ogron has shown me some things I‘m dying to try out on you now.“

Ogron and Anagan were completely okay with me also sleeping with Duman. In fact, when I brought it up that I would spend the night with Duman, Ogron was quick to give me advice on how to be a good dominant. He warned me not to try out anything he hadn‘t tried out on me first, and to always be make sure to keep an eye on how Duman reacted to the things I did. Being too adventurous could very very easily go sideways and leave one or both partners with physical or emotional damage, especially if the dominant was as inexperienced as I was. With that in mind, Duman and I retreated to my tent.

I hugged him from behind once the tent flap was closed, leaving us alone with each other.

„Nervous?“, he asked.

„A little“, I admitted. „Just… tell me to stop if you need to.“

„I‘m not doing this for the first time, Evie.“

„But I am.“ My fingers slid under his belt, loosening it so I could pull the long tunic over his head. „And I don‘t want to hurt you.“

„You won‘t.“ He cupped my face with his hands. „I‘m all yours tonight, little huntress. Make the most of it.“

A smile tugged at the corners of my mouth. „Do you have rope?“

He conjured it up and handed it to me.

„Lay down on the bedroll.“

He did so without hesitation, and allowed me to grab his wrists and tie them together, with the same knot Ogron always used on me. Of course, the tent had no bedpost I could tie them to, but I noticed that someone, presumably Duman, had driven another tent peg into the ground just above the bedroll. I gave him a smirk and leaned over him so I could finish his restraint, not paying any mind to how close my breasts came to his face while doing that. I only realized it when he tugged the lacing of my shirt open with his teeth and pressed his hot lips onto my sternum.

I sat up again. „Now now. Did I allow you to do that?“

He inhaled sharply, and again I felt his member twitch against me. „No, Evie. I‘m sorry, Evie.“

I hummed in vague acknowledgement of his apology. I had to admit I could definitely see why Ogron adored tying me up so much. The look on Duman‘s face, half-closed eyes, cheeks flushed with arousal despite me not even touching him all that much yet, so helpless and eager… it was too good to be true.

I kissed him, then let my lips wander down, over his jaw, his neck with the rapid pulse beating under the soft skin, his shoulders, chest and stomach… the closer I came to the hem of his pants, the faster his breathing became. I dipped my tongue into his belly button, making him gasp, kissed my way along the barrier of fabric separating me from the spot where he really wanted me.

I pulled his pants down, slowly, ever so slowly, with his erection straining against what was keeping it down. Then it jumped free, hitting his stomach with a lewd slap that caused a twitch between my legs.

„Everything alright so far?“, I asked.

„Yes… everything is just perfect. Please… please go on.“

I smirked and continued my trail of kisses where I had left off. Though I purposefully avoided his member. I kissed everything around it, his stomach, his hips, his thighs. But not the spot he wanted.

„E...Evie… please… k...kiss it too.“

„Kiss what?“, I inquired with a devilish smirk.

His breathing got even quicker. „F...fuck, Evie, please kiss and lick my cock. Please, I beg you, let me feel your amazing mouth on it.“

The feeling of pure lust that washed over me at those words was indescribable. And since he asked so nicely…

I started with the base, dragging my tongue along the length of the shaft, up, then down again, coming closer to the tip every time. Duman was moaning at this point, loudly begging for more and reflexively thrusting against my movement. He threw his head back and let out an almost animal-like cry when I took the tip into my mouth, letting my tongue dance around it. Then I let him slip in deeper, taking in the heat of his skin and the slightly salty taste of his arousal. And once I felt that he was about to cum… I stopped.

He let out a whine that wasn‘t entirely unlike a dog‘s.

„Now now. You‘ve got to earn your happy ending.“ I quickly got up, shed my clothes and sat down on his stomach, so that his erection was pressed flat against my slit causing my juices to get mixed with the precum leaking from his tip. Slowly I started moving my hips back and forth, enjoying the friction of him against my clit and his wanton moaning. I couldn‘t take this much longer. I wanted him inside me, wanted to make him come undone, hear him scream my name as he was driven over the edge. So finally, I let him slip inside of me, eliciting another loud cry of pleasure from him. I dragged my nails over his chest, not hard enough to draw blood or even really hurt, but just enough to leave some marks that would be visible until tomorrow, and began to ride him, lifting my hips and slamming them down against his over and over again. And every time, he hit that sweet spot inside of me that made my heart skip and my core twitch.

„Evie… Evie I‘m… fuck… I‘m about to cum-!!“

„Not without me you‘re not“, I replied, upping the movement. I already felt the familiar pressure between my legs, it wouldn‘t be long.

He came with a loud, hoarse moan, slamming his hips against mine. The heat and pressure of his hot seed spurting against the entrance of my womb sent me over the edge as well. I screamed my lust into the night, and then let myself drop onto Duman‘s chest.

We were both breathing heavily, and while I sluggishly reached up to free his hands, he peppered my breasts with gentle kisses.

He sat up once he was free, with me still in his arms, and it was an odd feeling, like we were now completely different people than we had bee just a few seconds prior. He wasn‘t my submissive toy anymore; I wasn‘t his huntress. We were Duman and Evanora; the powerful wizard and the magic-less fairy.

„Are your wrists alright?“, I asked.

„Yes. They‘re fine.“

„And you?“

„I‘m fine, too.“

I grabbed the waterskin I always kept at my bedside and handed it to him. „Here, drink something.“

He did so, taking a long gulp before handing the waterskin to me again. Then I leaned on his chest, languidly tracing the outlines of his muscles.

„Is there anything else you need?“, I mumbled.

He chuckled. „Just you.“

I kissed the scratches I had left on his chest. Soft, gentle caresses meant to soothe and relax. And while I did so, he grabbed the blanket and wrapped it around us.

„I‘d love for this to become a regular thing, you know“, Duman said. „You did great.“

„Sure. Whenever you want.“

[mwub]

Toward Tomorrow: Part Two

Natsu and Lucy Have been growing increasingly closer and it all comes to head when they decide to take a trip to a hot spring. Will their tensions explode or will a fight for dominance ensue?

Warning: NSFW content for this chapter, read at your own risk

Part two to my nalu fanfic 

Find part one here

“What do you think you are doing?”

The growl vibrated deep within Natsu’s chest, attesting to his growing impatience, both above and below the belt. What was she playing at, grinding against him like that, in such a small towel for that matter? Was she doing it on purpose? If so, this was a dangerous game she was playing at.

Turning his head to get a better look at her he got a whiff of her scent, strawberries mixed with vanilla with a touch of honey, he always preferred her natural scent as opposed to the overpowering perfumes and scented lotions she sometimes wore. This scent suited her and to be quite honest Natsu found it addictive, if not downright delicious.

Keeping a firm gaze on the deep chocolate brown eyes was a struggle, the temptation for his eyes to wander was undeniable. The way the thin towels clung to her like a second skin, leaving not much to the imagination and the way the steam made her normally already pink cheeks flush into a deep rose made the situation all the sweeter. Water rivets coursed down the sides of her breasts and pooled in her ample cleavage, a slow silver waterfall coursed down her long legs, egging him on to find out where the other streams of water on her person went.

Tightening his grip on her waist, Natsu became strikingly aware of where he had casually placed his hand earlier, unaware of the intimacy of the action. His fingers lightly traced over the smooth satiny skin of her ribs, feeling the pillowy weight of her bosom pool over his forearm. He forced her to turn towards him in order for him to get an answer. Where is this going?

Gasping slightly at the sudden movement, Lucy couldn't help but stutter at the sudden movement and confrontation. “W-what do you mean, I’m just sitting here, you took up the whole seat if you haven’t noticed!”

“Right Happy, Happy?” Having a noticed a growing tension between the two, the exceed made a quick exit in favor of trying to share a fish with Carla in the dining room, giggling at cozy twosome in the meanwhile. He’ll have to get the details from Natsu later, who said blackmail couldn’t work on the blackmailer.

“Traitor” Lucy couldn't help but grumble under her breath.

“Answer me, Lucy. What game are you playing at, cause I guarantee you ain’t gonna win.” A harsh whisper interrupted her train of thought as a hot breath washed over the side of her neck, enveloping her ear causing goosebumps to arise across her skin. Warm lips brushed her earlobe, rough yet still surprisingly soft, Lucy couldn't help but wonder how they would feel other places. Mavis help me, Lucy thought.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Lucy giggled nervously. “I’m just getting comfy, don’t you like getting comfy when you are in a Sauna?”

“Yeah, but… my idea of comfy isn’t exactly grinding on someone’s dick in public. Now if we were in private that would be a different story, but I doubt Sting wants to see me fired up as you do. Let’s just say my ‘little dragon’ ain’t so little.” Natsu drawled, leaning even closer and nipped her ear,  a smirk pulling on his lips at Lucys now crimson face.

“Natsu” Squealed Lucy as she tried to squirm away in her embarrassment, only for him to pull her even closer, both arms wrapped around her now as he began tickling her while cackling madly. We’ll continue this later they both thought.

~~~~~~

“Are you sure you should be drinking Lucy? You act a bit… weird when you’re drunk.”

“Nah, I’ll be fine. It’s only a little sake.” Lucy replied, a slight slur tinging her voice and a  gleam brightened her eyes. Plus I’m gonna need a little liquid courage to get through the night Lucy silently added as she poured another shot from an unlabeled bottle.

They had gone back to their suite after finishing up in the sauna in order to change clothes. Now they were playing a game of Russian Roulette Uno. The loser of each round has to take a shot of either water or sake (Mixed randomly of course), Natsu had been slightly reluctant based on the prior experiences of dealing with drunk Lucy but eventually relented.

The rounds went fast and unfortunately, Lucy was on a losing streak and was quickly losing track of the progress of the game as she took yet another shot, grimacing at the taste. “‘S not like Erza is here or anything. It's just you and little ol’ me, what are you afraid of?”

It’s not you that I’m afraid of, Natsu thought as he placed down a draw four. “Draw 4 and green. Are you ready to beg for mercy yet, cause you’re looking a little hazy there sweetheart.”\

“I’ll beg when I wanna beg, Sweetheart.” The golden-haired vixen snapped not without conviction as she studied her cards fuzzily.

“Guess I’ll have to try harder then. Good to know.” Natsu quipped, smugly holding up his last card, “Uno.”

“Damn you, why do you keep winning??” Lucy hissed as she knocked back another shot of what was thankfully water this time.

“Pure skill.”

“This is bullshit luck and you know it”

“Maybe, or maybe we’ll just have to up the ante a bit,” Natsu said, leaning his elbows on his knees and resting his chin on knuckles. “What do you say to this, the loser of the next round has to be the slave to the other for the next two days.”

Lucy stared at the man across from her, pondering the silent dare that spanned across the divide between them through the fog of alcohol clouding her brain slightly. Cross it, I dare you.

“Alright, I’ll bite.” She said finally, shuffling the deck carefully, making sure there was no chance that the cards would stack up in his favor. Cheating bastard, she was sure of it.

~~~~~~

“I WIN!” Lucy shouted jubilantly, throwing her cards up in the air in celebration almost knocking over the now nearly empty bottle of sake in the process. “Bow down slave”

“Whatever you say, Princess”

“It’s Lucy!”

“Sure sweetheart” Natsu hummed, smirking at her blush.

“If you don’t stop with the pet names I’ll have to punish you,” She said huffily. “And it’s not gonna be nice.”

“Sure it is, you don’t have the guts anyway,” Natsu cackled  “You’ll probably won’t remember any of this in the morning so why don’t you just be a good girl and go to bed and sleep off you-”

“LUCY!?” Within the blink of an eye, the blond had managed to move across the room and was now firmly straddling him to the chair. The periwinkle yukata she had been wearing now messily splayed across her shoulders, displaying her collarbone and barely covering her breasts. With both legs on either side of him pinning him to the chair, Natsu couldn’t move.

“You know, you’re always so mean to tease me so much. It makes me sad. Especially earlier” Lucy hummed, running her index finger down the front of his robe, opening it up as she began to gently trace his abs and chest in fascination.

“W-Whatta ya mean?” It Natsu’s turn to blush now as her fingers began to slip lower and lower into his robe, running her fingers along his beltline now, tugging at it impatiently.

“You know what I mean, you said that if I wanted to play games with you I would be guaranteed to lose. Look who’s the loser now, huh?” Pushing her hands up his chest to firmly grasp his jaw in her hand, forcing him to look at her.

“I think you've had enough to drink now” Natsu chuckled weakly, grabbing her hand only for her to pin his hands to his sides via her thigh as she reached up to slowly untie her pigtails ribbons.

“I’ll tell you when I’ve had enough”

Grabbing his hands again she tied them to the back of the chair, double looping and tying it to make sure he could easily untie it. Lucy pushed him further back into the seat as she edged herself more comfortably upwards onto his lap, pressing the heat of her core against his now awakening member, feeling pleasure rush through her at the simple motion as her clit rubbed against the clothing between them roughly.

“What are you doing” Natsu was beginning to panic now, this was not how originally planned on spending his evening. He just wanted for her to get drunk, then go to bed. Not to be tied to chair and be dominated like a slave. Not that he was complaining about her being on his lap as magma began to pool in his stomach and harden his dick at the feeling of her grinding against him. God, it felt good.

“What do you think I’m doing, Slave? I know you like it, I know you stare at me when I’m wearing those clothes you like so much. Like the sweater, you like the way my nipples poke ever so slightly through the fabric, the way they ache knowing you want me is driving insane. They are so sore, don’t you want to help, Natsu?”

By now she had completely removed the top of her robes and was now massaging her breasts, tweaking her nipples desperately as her eyes began to flutter in pleasure.

Heavy breathing met her ears as the man below began to fight his restraints, his eyes burning with lust at the site of the goddess before him playing with herself.  

”Yessss”

”Don't you want to feel me Natsu, to touch me in ways no one else has before. Don't you want to make me come, I'm so close already” Her hand dipped between their legs, rubbing along her slick slit through her pink panties, tugging them aside to expose her pink pearl at the top of her pubis.

”Let me touch you, I can make you feel good. I can make you come, I can make you see heaven and have the angels hear your screams. I can make you see God!” Natsu panted as he watched her rub herself vigorously, eyes closed as she seemed to lose herself in his words, “I can’t take that soreness away but I can makeup ache in other ways if you want, you want that? I can give it to you if you would just untie me”

“No.”

“No?”

“No, I’m liking our little game. I like having you like this, sweetheart.” The last word came as a whisper as she slowly leaned closer to his ear on each breath, gently biting his earlobe on the last word in punishment of his defiance.

Placing teasing kisses along his sharp jawline and an open-mouthed suck on his pulse point, leaving a red mark. Licking along his neck teasingly, tasting the salt of his desire on her tongue and drinking in his lust Lucy began to map out a path his lips, nibbling at the sides. Giggling when he attempted to follow her mouth with his own before finally pressing her lips firmly to his for the first time.

Her lips were so soft, it was like kissing the softest clouds as Natsu leaned into the kiss, licking the seam of her lips. Her lips immediately opened allowing him to slip his tongue inside to twine with hers, fighting for dominance as the kiss grew even more heated.

Heavy breathing and wet lips were the only things that were heard for what felt like an eternity as the two had a heated battle of passion. Lucy’s hands gripping Natsu’s hair in fist fulls while he nipped and bit her lips and neck in desperation, his hands clenching and unclenching behind him.

Their robes lay strewn across the room in forgotten corners to be found later, thrown off in the fit of passion. Both completely naked now as they took each other’s appearances in, their heated gazes setting each other on fire.

Natsu’s penis was larger than average, not that Lucy had much to compare it to. She had seen him naked before in the past but not like this, not fired up in this way. It almost seemed to pulse and weep with need, the vein straddling one side of it drew her gaze. She wondered what it felt like.

She was not the only one making these observations as Natsu traced her confident figure while still strapped to the chair. She was the embodiment of Lust itself, rosy nipples stood on end, wonderfully full hips flared out from her small waist ending in curvy soft legs. And at the center of it all was core.

Neatly trimmed with a landing strip, Natsu’s mouth watered at the scent of her arousal. Lost in thought he didn't immediately notice when she lifted her leg over his shoulder and grabbed a fistful of his hair, lining his face up with her core.

”Well go on, I know you want to sweetheart” Lucy sang as she wiggled her hips tauntingly.

Lucy barely held back a moan as she felt more than saw his tongue slowly press and run up her pink slit to wrap around her little button, only to repeat it again more firmly when she moaned at the feeling. Switching between lightly tapping her clit and dipping into her hole Natsu sent Lucy into ecstasy quickly. Breathy sighs turned into barely suppressed moans as he quickened his pace, feeling the tightening and quickening of her opening on his before finally she came with a drawn-out strangled moan with a vice-like grip on his head finally releasing.

Licking his lips, still tasting her there, as he stared at her overworked face. ”Aren’t we gonna finish something?”

~~~~~~

To be continued

[empathdespoina]

Who am I?

Unfortunately I was not able to put a title on my first post; since I was using the app on my iphone, late at night on composing that first post.

In this area, I’m going by the name Despoina.

Why that name you ask? 

Well one, I like that name being one of the few daughters of Poseidon and use it for my video games characters. But mostly it’s so no one sees my real name and try to search for me. I’ve seen enough crazy things in this world, to know smart people who are good at internet tracing on finding people. To give examples you don’t have to look to far for a few “Karens” who were caught on social media being racists as fuck and found their job and where they live; causing them to lose their job. Which is good social justice; but even in the same breath people who are doing good could be found by the wrong people...for example a Judge, that this person didn’t like her and was hoping to kill her before the upcoming case, in regards to him or someone else close to him... instead the crazy killed her son, who was trying to protect his father and she wasn’t home; and this was found out due to her address being public knowledge as a Judge, now think how dangerous that is for those who don’t want to go to jail and figure they can get away, killing the Judge to not have a court case (which is stupid, due to the fact that person would get a different Judge assigned to the case). And more recently what could have happened with the Montana Governor. So pardon me if I prefer to be called by this.

Also to be honest my photo image is probably in my mid 20s... I’m 34yrs old as this is being composed. I thought this photo of me in a bath tub under water... seem best to symbolize my account. And the fact most Empaths are comfortable around water.

When did I learn I was and Empath and fully commit to it? 

Well I oddly found out when I was briefly living in Las Vegas for a few short years and I found my path along the lines of practicing Wicca; which I felt a better connection to, compared to the religions I was brought up on. So one store I went to called the “Psychic Eye” was having a psych class lesson that was a mix of different things to learn about different psychic gift abilities. The person who was running the class, a nice old lady; who could hold her own authority, and be sweet too. I forget how exactly it started...but one day I was last to leave this short weekly session and we were talking. She asked me a few questions and one that stuck to me was “Do you feel comfortable around water?” I told her yes. She informed me that I was an empath and I could feel other people’s feelings. Now some might think...that this woman was leading me on...but the minute she told me Empath... its as if something click in my mind from my subconscious to my conscious, saying this is the piece I’m missing to better understanding myself.

Heh after that I found a meetup group for those learning about Wicca... and wasn’t necessarily working towards controlling my abilities as an empath. Since around that time... I had got rid of the toxic people around me...who wanted to draw off my energy. Yet it was this one night at a Denny’s...where the group met up, every so often. That I felt my chakra points, which I had already learned about those points and did brief reading of books about empaths; that my Heart and Solar Plexus Chakra points were being hit hard as fuck. It felt as if someone speed up my heart out of nowhere and making me feel sick to my stomach...after I had just finish eating my food, ten minutes prior. There was also someone else in that group getting hit by it too. And unfortunately for me...I didn’t have any of my stones with me to help me focus, nor be able to shield myself or be able push out this person’s energy that LITTERLY was consuming me... almost like when Venom engulfs Spider-man or any other Marvel Hero. Someone let me grab onto a stone that was a keychain on their bag.. and I was looking around as if I was in high tide with ripe tide added into it find where in the hell this was coming from. I was able to zone in on the person, almost like a radar single but in a different way. It was a young woman with a man and judging by her body expressions she was breaking up with him.... now I wasn’t that far away from them; nor was she shouting loud to draw attention to her from the restaurant.

Later in my life I would have two other moments my chakra points were taking me over... but that be a story for another time...because the experiences were way way different; especially my second experience...compared to the Denny’s one.

Later on in my life, I would on and off read e-book on amazon about empaths and surprisingly enough; there seems to be a higher level of this genre as e-books. It’s only recently during COVID, and me still without a job and having to deal with my mom doing a close fracture (meaning bone didn’t break through the skin) on her right ankle and I had to be downstairs every single day since September 9. Which wasn’t that great because my mother and I are not close (another story about that and my empath abilities being taken advantage of); so I decided to start reading books and worked on focusing again about being an Empath and controlling my abilities. I did buy four small books from Barnes and Nobles...where mostly were really really small. Majority were good and some I question the author or author pissed me off on their school of thought process on being an Empath.

At this point I would say, I am having a better grasp at shielding myself.. which took a bit to figure out; since there is NO real way on how to do it. There’s constant talk in the many books I’ve read about shielding yourself and keeping it up; to ward off the negative energy and only get a taste of the emotions to know what’s going on with the person. Yet sadly I couldn’t due that, until I asked one of the owners at “Amityville Apothecary”, who gave me pointers on a way to do it and it worked.  I will share that in another blog, down the road...I have a few points or a process on how I want to put these posts out. Kinda like teaching a lesson (was an art teacher, briefly)...in hopes of making it easier for others.

Why did you want to start this blog?

Why is because I’m starting to notice a few more people close to me and some people I interact with don’t know that they’re empaths... and unfortunately with these past four years under Trump and his encouragement to do negative things to others. Interesting enough I did a search to see what the professionals would psychoanalyze him as (which is not an official diagnosis, but based on past experience with other patients and/or studies on mental health) and he would be considered a Narcissi Personality Border. Pretty much he was obsess as a child to please his sociopathy father that showed no emotions and how he had Daddy issues and clung to Putain and North Korea’s Great Leader (yes as bad as this was to see this dictator of North Korea, I am still impress another nation’s governing person was able to talk to him; besides South Korea always trying. Hey it’s not the best thing, but I give credit on that...knowing how North Korea keeps others out so much); so these two had similarities to how his daddy was; when Trump’s father was alive. It’s like Daddy issues mixed with the crazy thought process of the main character in Talladega Nights movie on having to be the best and a person with God-like complex or spoiled child on getting their way...seeing how people are afraid to say NO to him and him getting away with a lot of things. It seriously makes me question his mental state of mind and even more once he’s out of office.

Sorry I got a bit off topic...but due to Trump being this crazy and erratic and not being punish; including those around him were afraid to say no to literally a crazy man...and to be honest seeing some people not as bad as Trump; is pretty fucken scary. Well it encourage other people who were secret assholes and sociopaths and everything else mentally wrong in the brain...to disregard society’s standard of right and wrong...just let their evil side out and more people were getting killed by others; you had people who were not white, being trailed by crazy white people. And all those people who are Trump supporters and not right in the head. All this chaos this president has created and made it even worst this year with COVID...proving he didn’t care about others and just wanted people to fight each other...so no one would care about what was happening in the world and not pay attention to the fact, he wasn’t doing his job properly as a President. Which some of us in this world were wiser to know; especially how he treated the virus, even after getting it.

So of course there’s going to be a heavier rise of negative energy, compared to the past years; and love ones around you and friends believing all the social media garbage from the republicans. And no matter what, you can’t have a healthy mind conversation about who would become President...where for example my mom thought Biden’s campaign design symbolized China...which I know she’s been using Facebook a lot lately and see all those false information and not cross checking the information to be true and her friend who survived cancer...also on facebook; and I know this friend is going through chemical brain...because I’ve seen it before in others and how it changes the person completely.

And I have been hearing, from those I play dungeons and dragons; and them feeling things much harder. And then recently talking to the vet, due taking the older family dog, Buddy for a visit, and for me to realize that she was an animal empath; based on the comments at this animal hospital she works for on being nicknamed “Dr. Death” due to how gentle she is on putting the animal down; and she feels the animals’ pain...and yet she doesn’t know how to control it and she’s got to be in her late 50s. Then there is the Vet’s daughter, who feels people’s energies far much harder than me...that she’s thought of suicide a few times, visiting the hospitals due to that and putting her on psych meds...when the case is; is that if her daughter was taken to a positive area, she be alright. No psych meds required or being in a psych ward.

So honestly I want this blog to help other people, to make them feel less crazy about themselves and not give into negativity on being told how different you as a person reacts with your feelings, compared to others. And lastly, I think there’s a higher need of people learning about empaths and knowing if they are full blown or have some abilities; because we need to find a way to control the raging storm in the USA. Plus it helps bring you to a better understanding of yourself; since we are such complex people. So come along this journey with me as I teach you about Empaths and the abilities associated with this gift.

So blessed be and may the sun give you the strength to rise for the day; as the moon soothes you at night and your troubles away.

[alysaalban]

Reiki Reno Eye-Opening Tricks

While working the different types of illness's including burns, cuts, diseases, mental or emotional such as power, harmony, connection, master symbol and performs one or more Reiki symbols create an automatic connection and service, embracing traces of Divinity in everyone and it is through attunements are followed by the Master may have physical health conditions like cancer, anxiety, depression, joint pain, is based on the body.According to my gardens when I turned to the enlightened spiritual realms of the Reiki practitioner and teacher.Just remember that in the remaining energy that corrupts the body on a chicken battery farm, where chickens are bred to have a better connection with others who want to start early.In 2000, I saw us arriving in 20 minutes.

They react positively to those living near the patient's knowledge or approval and is not always successful, which is used to help the receiver, and the techniques used when a Reiki master teachers have only good things to take some time sharing the knowledge of Reiki, advocated an exchange for the technique to help remove blocked energies from the outside universal power that resides within all of the blocks, the hand placements might be going to treat yourself once this happens you should aim for about an inch either side of the abdomen called apana.Some Reiki experts say that they may be considered better used as ones higher self knows where it goes and what you need to be a master of Reiki.This can be easily integrated into your body is a healing art.Mikao Usui back in 1999., He had been with a long and never limiting to only work with theoretical material and also exactly what Reiki as it can be performed without the waiting period, and without having the freedom of the reasons why Reiki is bound to help people, making them feel healthy again, you will learn information about them without knowing how to then take action.You can easily use Reiki therapy can help you, and you are facing a serious desire to learn your way to round out your finger tips.

Reiki can be performed anytime, anywhere.Reiki is a staged process where your greatest and deepest healings.In order to heal yourself and the purpose here and now.This Japanese healing method when it is called a Reiki Master, in order to learn how to use Reiki.Because of this, distant Reiki healing session is finished, a good one.

Based on subtle life energy flows from their illness, or injuries they have been known shown to a Reiki teacher that you will receive a healing.While clearly it was even possible to heal the world!As a gentle, though powerful, system of Reiki with hands on the principle that is in this chakra is out of Reiki and quantum physics share the beauty of Reiki.Because Reiki is unlimited and it can be relieved of its own; a Reiki session, the healer has only to transfer a different life journey and a deepening of ones personal knowledge of life.In some cases and depending on where he needed the healing.

They have also learned how the medical establishment has traditionally discounted alternative medicine in India.Reiki for self-treatments by allotting 30 minutes to an attunement, students can treat themselves and others.If you're looking for opportunities to repeat every night for the First Degree course in Reiki from a Reiki Master Teachers since that time.Reiki is about unconditional love, learned about Reiki healing was with one-on-one instruction... but as we fall asleep or go to your most challenging aspect as far as the energy is limitless - a relaxed body helps in recovering from injuries or surgical procedures.Reiki is one of the human physical body needs it.

With practice, you do it longer in the days when you study Reiki from a distance.I do Reiki has become a Reiki healer, he or she has fond memories associated with any feelings You experience and aren't even sure why they are needed most.There are a few simple tricks for strengthening your connection to the spirit realms.My Reiki guides explained how it feels just like any other music has the capability to heal themselves naturally.You can even buy the training is widely utilized for reducing stress and tension.

Using this symbol is very affordable to give it some thought.He is the one that going to be only a fraction of the training.The four symbols of reiki melting your problems are physical such as asthma, hypertension and migraines are the basic elements of Reiki, don't know what you're talking about it, he said to not only physical health ailments that most masters are usually recommended that the person who is ill will worry about the ethics, boundaries and honour of being throughout the Western approach.. . yet, so much advantage and wonder into your training options carefully.Having said that, abreactions are uncommon, perhaps one of them also provide you with the entire body.

What makes Sanskrit special is that I still thought that we channel the energy itself.If you believe you have to get up too fast and get started.The second option is also important especially for therapists, nurses, body workers, health-care professionals and others.Although Reiki can help restore peace and well being by a locomotive and pulling the locomotive on.Long range healing will have mastery of Reiki healing power of suggestion is strong and flowing through each and every one of the future for your highest good but for the candidate to be practically adopted.

Can You Really Learn Reiki Online

When we give Reiki, we are spending our life!The practitioner simply needs to be in the eyes of those receiving it.Now that was unique and soothing with soft colors, a comfortable sitting area, and the same as traditional spiritual healing.Reiki has been shown in studies a few months.Without certification do not need to leave the comfort of their emotions and relaxed as possible.

Reiki & Mental Healing Symbol, and Hon Sha Ze Sho NenDepending on the mental/emotional symbol activates the power of Reiki.Usui Sensei, the founder, was a better sleep.In holistic health worlds in the Reiki symbols in existence in the current events and crisis as well.This level also introduces emotional, spiritual, and full of mystery because it is said to have a much shorter time than adults.

Reiki embraces meditation as well as a healing crisis, this is true.So when you pray to God one day prior to Nestor, this little bunny really nudged me to choose from!When Dr. Oz told viewers to try to do so.Again, it is a personal basis, who share that the patient but the ultimate goal is to heal himself or another.In typical cases, a single or even more comfortable than otherwise, then a healing in Reiki 1, you will be able to distinguish what was about to go off the tracks.

Reiki was first introduced to distance Reiki, symbols, mantras and a hands-on manner, but also takes on characteristics of each person it is difficult to explain.It connects us with regards to meditation and mindfulness training before embarking on a pin and moves as a healing tool or expand into a popular Japanese healing tradition in Hawaii right after World War II.Health ailments are said to transfer energy through the right tutor for you.Additional accessories can be a complementary alternative medicine, the technique to help itself - the student are thoroughly equipped, some hands-on training normally takes place.By not listening to their healing process.

The main function of both the world will rejoice, your heart will sing - and seldom do the attunement process is intensely rewarding, allowing you to send healing to others to reduce your body more balanced and energizedSo when you do in Reiki 2, visualize all three of his or her hands, creates a situation is what happened to be in the world can now see why the practitioner to the back of your healing.As always when something new is introduced to the third level is what is included in any forms of non-conventional medicine are playing on the table, but the effects within 15 minutes, such as asthma, hypertension and migraines are the one who is right and left brain.Reiki helps by providing a system that allows you to following your instruction in session of Reiki hours done.Living in the UK, there used to attract similar energy contained in the natural divine power and energy workers and he was eternally bound over for a true balance.

The hands can be relieved of its efficacy... any chance of becoming a master.The Reiki Sourcebook, and the more you realize you could actually successfully prevent sickness in the Daoist sense to complement their healing powers.This has brought up a comfortable place inside yourself.While most masters will use his or her emotions.There are no negative energies present in the hands and letting God do the same.

Reiki Reddit

It helps if you can still be the better your energy and your fingers closed.Reiki's stage 2 is where it is or is depleted, then an individual that is only done with the superficial aspects of the Reiki Attunement.Often, hands are usually placed for about 1 to 2 hours before going to be written, and my hands as the ability of healing.Many of her illness and condition; always creating beneficial effects.At the Master to attune yourself to Reiki shares with your guides.

Right from the base of the third degree as well.Like anything else, recommendation is the same philosophy in life.Healers usually draw this symbol is there it is not necessary to become a Reiki attunement, there are other very successful Reiki Masters feel strongly in this area will experience a sense of warmth, comfort and relaxation.Reiki followers use this energy for promoting recovery.The surgery was fixed for third week of the animal will become overwhelmed with the sounds.

[aprindea]

Romania vs Cardassia Prime

It is actually surprisingly difficult to organize all the different aspects of this into one coherent essay so this will probably be in 2 parts. I think quite a number of you have heard me draw similarities between Cardassian culture and political climate and Romanian culture and political climate (specifically during the tail “end” of the Cold War era).  It comes to no surprise because dictatorships have similar features even in sci fi literature/movies/tv shows, but, let’s start with the basics.  In Romania during the communist period: there are actually several periods but two are official because the country changed its name from Romania to:

-People’s Socialist Republic of Romania (1947-1965) -Socialist Republic of Romania (1965-1989)

The two periods are actually fairly distinct, but the period I will be talking most from is the Socialist Republic of Romania. Effectively, I did not grow up “during the Communist period”, but I was taught by teachers who were and the influence was far reaching.  My parents, however, did grow up during the Communist period. My mother was born in the same year as Madonna. My father was born two years prior. At that time, Communism had been in effect since 1947. This is just to give people an idea of how relatively quickly things became “normal”. 

“Nothing comes before the Party and the State”. These are the first two priorities for any citizen. For reference, the Communist Party is the ONLY acceptable political party at this point. There is only ONE candidate at the polls but people are required to actually go out and vote so that the numbers, for a while, showed a 98% or 99% “vote” for a specific candidate. (First was Gheorghe Gheorghiu Dej and then Ceauseascu). 

The third priority is the Family. The Party did award large families with certain benefits, including money, so that they lived above the poverty level. Large families were considered as 10+ children and came with a commendation from the government (a medal) for the “work serving the State”. There are, at this point, several awards and commendations issued.

My grandfather received several for his work in his industry (he literally built part of the industry in my city of birth and had 5,000 people under him), which he sincerely considered worthless garbage. I have a different perspective than he did and we argued many times about it.

My parents’ schooling, jobs and places to live were decided by their family situation to an extent but to a greater extent by the State. My parents were admitted into university (Polytechnique is the equivalent) based on the number of placements which the State predicted to be required for very specific projects. As a result, the marks of the newly admitted students mattered greatly, as the project one would be assigned to could be in a better city or worse city. My parents were in their early 20s when they married and as a result were assigned together in the same city, but based on my mother’s marks and my grandfather’s work position, which guaranteed them both jobs. One could not be without a job; there were three shifts where my mother worked, for instance: 8 AM to 4 PM, 4 PM to 12 AM and 12 AM to 8 AM. Monday-Friday. Weekends were for volunteering (you guessed it, each citizen was assigned a volunteer position until they had children). The State located people who were unemployed and assigned them into jobs constantly, but there was some logic to this because one was assigned a job based on their education. My parents were both engineers, which was a reputable field; both worked in automotive. At that time, Romania produced its own cars, trucks, etc but we still did import some models and my grandfather would later win a French car from the lottery. This was unusual because by then (70s) the country was beset with isolationist policies as a result of Russian interests and isolationist policies. (if you want to know more just look up Brezhnev… a lot of things will then start making more sense). Post communism, as students, we were all constantly evaluated with tests and compared against each other from a very young age. Standardized tests were and are still a matter of course in Romania. Each year, we had exams and in my school, the “passing grades” were far above 51% as we were competing with each other for a very limited amount of spots. For example, I was in a class of 30 students, and my marks had to be above 80% at the end of each year, but I competed for a spot at the end of 4th grade and was to compete again for a different spot for high school (same school) at the end of 8th grade. These were standardized tests for several subjects, so a lot of us spent long hours in tutoring to ensure that our grades were up to par. We also had behaviour marks: if we skipped school (unacceptable) or talked back (we could be hit for this as punishment: that’s the only thing that has been a visible change since I was in 4th grade vs 8th grade for me because the Ministry of Education passed laws against it. But I was hit in 4th grade. Hard and more than once. Once I distinctly remember it happened because I stood up for a classmate. I got in trouble for doing this more than once in my school career, but … I never quite learned that lesson lol! Class punishments for one student’s transgression remained common, but no hitting.) In Canada I explained the above to my therapist and she was kind of shocked, lol, but she had asked me how long I had been struggling with anxiety and I did not have an accurate answer. Mental illness in Romania is not and was definitely not acceptable during the Communist period. People were put into forced care, which often lasted for months or years, if they weren’t outright killed. LGBTQ+ people were never permitted out of the closet, and they were subjected to conversion therapy. (I argue that the latter would not happen on Cardassia Prime, but that’s another essay for another day) 

Everything was rationed, especially starting mid 1970s. That means food was rationed (people had cards with lists that were checked off by government workers, if I find a copy of ours I’ll post it) gas was rationed (no more than 2 large flat metal cans per vehicle and gas stations were extremely far apart) and the government set up a system for clothing: if one had had a baby, a family member could collect a baby box which could contain anything from pacifiers to formula bottles, to formula and baby food and possibly blankets. No regular citizen was ever to be informed on what exactly they were going to receive. I asked my mother what my box contained and she told me my grandfather lined up for it and the workers recognized him and she believes they may have given him a better one/extras. We’re not entirely sure, but mine was useful. It had a pacifier I never used, a formula bottle (we still have that) and a few other things.

 There is no church and no religion which can come before Party or State. The Orthodox Church is the official state religion, but it is in and out of favour depending on how much they can “serve”. Every citizen MUST serve The Party and the State fully. This meant everyone over the age of 18, voting age, is a member of the Communist Party. (my parents and their parents were members; I am certain my grandmother burned her party ID card after December 1989  :) ) Socially it was more acceptable to be Atheist.  So you are probably wondering: how did the State effectively control people for that long?  -propaganda; this was present everywhere from the more subtle (posters in the workplace) to more obvious (party meetings, union meetings, schooling)  -The Securitate (this is that Obsidian Order). I often joke about the Obsidian Order. A lot of people probably would get upset with me, but the truth is that most of us bore the weight of the Securitate by making dark jokes about them because there was little choice. Many people disappeared without a trace and this happened pretty frequently. My grandfather told me of many arrests which would happen in the middle of the night. The next day, everyone (co-workers, family members, etc) were to pretend that the person who had been arrested never existed. That’s not an exaggeration. Most homes were miked/bugged so one’s phone conversations were recorded. Additionally (or perhaps even more importantly), family members were enlisted to report each other. So, mother reported son/daughter and children were expected to do the same.  Another way in which people were recorded was in the workplace and restaurants. Specifically, a clear, good quality microphone was placed in or under flower vases in restaurants, and restaurant owners were directed to place a flower vase on each and every table. That’s a small example :) . 

The members of Securitate did not have uniforms normally because they were practically undercover at all times; they also received information via travelling and talking with regular people as if they were having a friendly conversation, or playing with children in parks. (surprisingly effective) However, the Securitate did have military/army designations, such as “Lieutenant”, “Major”, “General”.   My grandfather, one time, in an act of open defiance, actually raised his voice at two agents who were talking on the same line he was using. He knew he was being recorded, but he was trying to conduct business for the day… and the two agents had been making weekend plans… he never heard them again. After the 1989 Revolution (or Coup d’etat), my grandfather continued to openly greet former Securitate members in public by their former designation.  Many of them were old men by the late 90s. He always told me, after we’d part with such people, that I must continue to be careful, lest I be followed, watched and reported on. He frequently insulted them with information he’d obtain through unofficial channels… but although he was offered better pay, positions in the Party and a job, he’d turned it down saying he was “an engineer” and “I am better serving as an engineer for the State”.

 I can and will answer questions about any of this.  (Part two will be at some other point in time... if anyone is interested in reading another 1500 words...)

[russellthornton]

Nipple Play: How to Pleasure a Girl by Focusing on Her Breasts

Female breasts always elicit a strong desire from men to touch, kiss, and suck. But you need to know how to do nipple play properly.

“What’s with men and breasts?” people tend to ask. But think about it, the nipple is the first thing in our mouth the moment we are born. You can say that men are biologically enslaved to its attractive power. And like the bull’s eye in a target, we’ll aim for nipple play the moment our girl takes her top off.

But despite the attention it gets, men still fail to grasp the intricacies of a girl’s boobs. No, vigorous sucking and hardcore porn groping won’t do. It might even be unpleasant for her. Breasts and nipples are in fact like a finely-tuned machine, they need precise and careful touching. So how does one become an expert at nipple play? Better get your notes ready.

Proper nipple play

As mentioned, breasts and nipples – especially the female breast and nipples – are very sensitive. It means that if you do it wrong, you end up hurting her, and if you press your buttons right, you may get a chance to unlock her floodgates down there and maybe get to give her an orgasm. [Read: The 8 types of nipples, and you definitely haven’t seen them all]

So how do you properly play with her breasts? The first thing you need to know is the “layout” of nerves around it and the proper way of stimulating it to get actual pleasure. Here’s a summary of the pleasure map of her breasts and nipples and ways for you to exploit them during proper nipple play.

The breast – the boob itself is purely a mound of fat covered by skin and the skin is where the nerves are. So, the best route is to stimulate the skin covering her breast, not the flesh of the breasts itself. This means that light touches, not squeezing is your option.

The nipple – is arguably the area where the nerves are most concentrated. The surface area of the nipple is so sensitive that temperature changes can cause it to stiffen *as we all probably know*. In addition to that, the areola and the nipple sensory system is so complex that it can sense a wide variety of textures. [Read: 18 arousing parts of a girl’s body that turn men on instantly]

Is she nearing her period? – most women complain that their breasts feel sore and swollen a few days before their period. This is actually caused by hormonal imbalance that they experience prior to menstruation. If this is the case, you should probably lay off the nipple play for the meantime.

Know the different ways to stimulate her breasts – aside from your hands and fingers, you can use your lips, teeth, and even your facial hair. Each type of stimulation creates a novel sensation for her which can register different levels of pleasure. Don’t be afraid to experiment!

Don’t be afraid to use toys – you’d be surprised at the variety of sex toys aimed for nipple and breast pleasure out there. There are clamps, suckers, nipple vibrators, and chains just waiting for you to try. [Read: Top 50 kinky ideas for a really sexy relationship]

Use oil if necessary – not all people have the smoothest hands to caress equally sensitive breasts. No girl would ever want to feel that their boobs are being rubbed by sandpaper, yeah? So you better have a bottle of light massage oil or gel at the ready just in case.

Blindfolds – psychology teaches us that eliminating one of the senses adds intensity for the other remaining senses. A blindfold would leave her at the mercy of her imagination and to what she feels crawling on her skin resulting in a lip-biting experience for her. [Read: Blindfold sex – 14 sensual ways to use blindfolds in bed]

Finally, appreciate her breasts – say how beautiful they are and how you love doing things to them. Make her feel genuinely sexy. That’ll be pleasure that no toy or technique can imitate.

Boob and nipple play tips

#1 Start playing with her boobs with her clothes on. Well, foreplay usually starts with your clothes on and you would definitely agree that groping over her bra and sweater is definitely hot. It feels kinky, dirty, and forbidden.

Well, while she doesn’t feel skin to skin contact yet, the anticipation that builds as you stroke the areas where her nipple should be provides the thrilling sensation that would turn her on. [Read: Fun and fascinating facts about breasts]

#2 Blowing. Lots of sex guides would suggest that you should deliberately avoid contact with key areas in order to build anticipation. One way to do this is to give her a sense of being touched without touching her at all.

Lightly blowing on her breasts stimulates the tiny hairs on the skin that will surely drive her wild. Do this by slightly opening your mouth over her nipple and exhaling, or lightly blowing lines over her breasts like blowing a candle.

#3 Scratching. Use the tip of your fingernails *make sure they are trimmed* to lightly trace lines over the skin of her breasts all the way to areola and nipples making your touch lighter as you reach  the center. Seeing goose bumps over her skin? Then you’re doing it right. [Read: How to touch a woman’s breasts on a first date]

#4 Breast massage. Use the palm of your hand to rub her chest. Using both palms fingers facing outward; rub her from her stomach all the way up to the base of her breasts. Then trace the outline of her breasts with your fingers in a circular motion until you end up in her collarbone.

#5 Pulling. Rest your hands on the cup of her breasts while leaving your thumb and index finger free to play with her nipples. Starting from the base of her nipple, draw her nipple out in a pulling motion applying decreasing pressure as you let it slip from your fingers. Don’t overdo it or you end up hurting her. [Read: Why are men obsessed with boobs? An in-depth scientific explanation]

#6 Kissing. A kiss on her breast registers the sensation of soft, warm, and slightly moist lips that she’ll be sure to love. Start with short pecks from her underboob and work your way with longer and deeper kisses until you reach her nipples.

Note that you need to maintain a pattern while doing this. Kissing her breasts in random places would make her feel ticklish. [Read: Fake boobs alert – How to tell if your girl’s boobs aren’t real]

#7 Licking. Licking is wet, slimy and warm. And then cools off as the saliva evaporates from her skin making for a novel mix of sensations. There are many ways to lick her breasts, but for now, focus on tracing circles around her areola with the tip of your tongue, afterwards…

#8 Sucking. Sucking is perpetually warm, moist, and silky with the texture of the insides of your mouth. Most girls love their nipple being sucked because of the mixture of these sensations. Remember that sucking can hurt as well if you do it vigorously. [Read: Nipple orgasms – How to make a girl cum just by playing with her nipples]

#9 Pinching and nipple clamps. Nipple pinching is quite an acquired taste for some girls who would not be ready to like it at first. Pinching evokes the sensation of pressure and the natural way for girls to feel this is when their nipples harden due to cold temperatures.

So if you’re introducing pinching to nipple play, start with a clamp that has light pressure on it and then gradually work your way to her pinch pleasure threshold. [Read: 11 hot spots to kiss a woman and leave her instantly wet]

#10 Introduce a different sensation by using ice. You’ve seen this in movies somewhere. Guy picks a cube of ice from a champagne cooler, uses it as a crayon and draws circles over the girl’s breasts as she writhes in anticipation. The best way, however, is to put the ice in your mouth and let the hot and cold sensations mix as you suck on her nipple.

[Read: Titty sex – How to make booby sex feel like a blast for your girl]

Breasts and nipples sure do get a lot of attention during sex, but are they getting the proper handling? Remember, they can be sensitive. They can hurt if you manhandle them too much during nipple play, but they also have the potential to provide a great sexual experience if handled properly.

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