#for seraph it's about being able to find the right answer but it's also about responsibility to do so. the weight of knowing y'know

[mossydice]

Ruthlessness not as cruelty, but conviction; as knowing only that you can see the solution, and they cannot ◂▸ more whisper vibes :]

[lostsoulaltair]

Owari no Seraph - Answer Found. A reason to live

Hello everyone, this post itself is a final conclusion of one of the aspects it's often touched in the manga story...and I finally found the answer to it.

P.S: Theories, analysis, thoughts are held in a neutral view, ships are excluded.

What is a reason to live? Why is it always emphasized on this story?

With the many chapters of the story, we've seen how many characters have talked about a "reason to live" right? Along this we've seen many "finding out one". But...

"Is finding a reason to live equivalent to live for others? Is it equivalent to fulfilling someone's dream?"

The answer to this is a big no. But why? Is there something backing this up?

Such answer lies on the next questions

Have you ever wondered why vampires become demons?

Why even humans can become demons?

Why do demons feed on desires?

Those questions actually can be answered on the very core of how vampires are made which is back when they were human beings.

The very main task of humanity is to find a purpose, to find a reason and a place in the world. Something that motivates you to live another day and struggle against the constant battles in life.

Thus, let's focus first on the very core group of the three that are bound by desires and emotions. Correct, the first group is

Humans

Despite humans being the most emotional group; humans are tasked with finding a purpose. Along the series, we've seen the MC state so many times he's going to live for someone, this also applies with Guren and Mahiru mainly. What do I mean?

Contrast to what it is believed, Yuu, Guren, Mahiru are characters that haven't found reasons to live; they're living for others along having objectives for others rather than themselves.

Guren ever since he was small he was raised to follow what it meant to be the head of the Ichinose Family. But that responsibility changed when he met Mahiru and saw himself as weak, unable to save the love of his life; adding to this, when his squad was defeated and killed, he was about to give up but he didn't and instead chose to follow the path he chose. Mahiru's destiny was set in stone if she wanted to see her baby sister alive, she had to quit any idea of actually living and finding a purpose. Yuu doesn't love himself, he craves love but there's not a single hint of him focusing on pursuiting a reason to live; a reason that can be called his for his own.

All these three have something in common and that is that they are demons, they've reached a step of becoming demons that exploit their desires.

But for that, let's explore the next group.

Vampires

Vampires have the normal desire to drink blood to live, which is an equivalent to humans eating and drinking water to live. Vampires are the group of humans that long gave up on life, they chose a different path instead of finding a path, to find a purpose and Mikaela is a prime example of that. He lives because Yuu is the being that pushes him to continue living but that's very different from actually willing to live along finding a reason to live.

Yuu is a motivation source, but not what Mikaela wants for his own self but let's not confuse that Mika has bad thoughts. But rather, Mikaela is an example of humans who aren't able to be strong against certain conditions and it's normal and something that shouldn't be criticized.

In special conditions, no matter the willpower one's soul carries, some things simply come like a wave, hitting us and overwhelming us. There can be sources that push us to continue but it's not akin as having the will.

This also applies with the vampire progenitors. They endured trials in their life but instead of walking in the path where the light of the sun lied, they chose the shadows. They resigned their humanity but in exchange, they became unable to find reasons to live.

Urd for example, given that he has no passion or lively emotions, he can only seek salvation through making vampires humans again, letting them find the final solace which is to die as a human being.

And given that we know that the final path for vampires is to become demons. Let's head towards such group.

Demons

The last step for vampires. But why do they become demons? Is that really the end?

Yes.

Vampires turn into demons not just because they can be made but rather, because they've never found out a reason to live. Hence as demons, they have a neverending craving of human desires so they can keep searching for eternity what they long lost and cannot seek. Demons are bound to get lost given that their former selves gave up in life to find a reason to live and exist.

One of the best examples for demons is Ashera Tepes. One who accepted the conditions of the First with the long dream of giving a happier world for his sister, Krul Tepes.

For sure, the day he died as a human, he was born as a vampire, he sought for his sister only to find her in her last breaths. But instead of allowing her to travel through the course of life no matter how painful it was, he made a choice for her. Krul didn't have a voice but rather his brother. The consequence? Krul was unable to die; she as a vampire was tired of living endlessly, with a never changing body, being unable to walk under the sun, being unable to walk on the path on which humanity walks and most importantly, being unable to the be ruler of her life.

Furthermore, even if he felt gratitude towards the First, what did Ashera even fulfilled? Did he have a personal dream for him? It will forever be unknown...he became someone that fed on desires given that demons have a chained need to them.

Then. What is to "find a reason to live?"

To find a reason, is to find a purpose, to give meaning to one's existance. It's not receiving or giving to someone given that people will be part of your path; but rather, it's actually deciding what you want to do, what dreams you want to achieve, to cry, to get angry, to stand up once again.

It's to literally choose why you want to keep standing, why a new day is a new opportunity, it's deciding your path for your own, not choosing for others but you alone, it's defining what makes you "you". What defines you exactly as the current being existing.

This couls be compared to our daily lives. What do we want to reach? You get emotion thanks to someone's art, speech, actions; then something like a flame bursts giving a fiery passion like emotion, and so, our actions begin but they're not made for selfishness. When you draw, when you create your first piece, what is it that you feel? When you manage to play your first song, what is it that you feel? When you make your first discovery, what kind of emotion is born? When you create your first story, what do you feel? When you conclude and give birth to new ideals, what is what your heart feels? When you pursuit a goal such as becoming number one or aiming to be first place or managing to do something that gives fulfillment, what kind of emotions are born?

But most importantly..

This is a delicate thread between being selfish vs giving love to one's self, embracing the concept of one's existance and walking firmly in this trip called life.

The squad right now, are having their own agenda, not Guren's, not Ferid's, not Mahiru's, nor Rigr's. But their own. They found a beacon of light but said beacon is motivating them to fight for what they want to achieve, for the very goals they have along finding for each other why they want to live and see a new tomorrow.

Mitsuba is slowly finding a reason, so will the boys do so as well.

Lastly, what differences humans from vampires in general, is that humans have the right to walk under the light for the very reason they keep fighting. Whereas vampires long lost the opportunity for that. They long abandoned the righteous path that would let them have a human heart.

Humans on the contrary, strive down a path until they leave a mark on the world. The memories they bury on Earth dance between the hearts of people they managed to connect with. And so it begins once again in a new cycle.

That's my answer.

What do you think dear readers? Let me know!

[ladylilithprime]

Day 26: Enchanted

CASTIEL WAS NOT in bed when Sam woke that morning. This wasn't exactly unusual - the Seraph didn't stay over at the Bunker every night, not since the renegotiation of angelic duties with the new leadership of Heaven accounting for a Divinely Sanctioned human mate and the resumption of those duties involving spending at least some time in Heaven doing things Castiel didn't always want to talk about later - but most nights that Castiel was in the Bunker and their bed when Sam went to sleep then he would usually wake up to find Castiel right beside him, watching him wake up with softly glowing eyes and a tender expression. Sam always felt a little embarrassed by that, especially since he knew that Castiel's presence in the bed was deliberate; the angel didn't sleep, and would frequently take the opportunity once Sam was out and unlikely to succumb to nightmares to read or investigate the store rooms in the Bunker for things that would or could be dangerous for a human to handle and catalog them properly. It was part of their morning ritual for Castiel to review those discoveries with Sam, and Dean if he was awake and present, over breakfast and coffee. The only times Castiel didn't come to bed before Sam woke were when something was dangerous or preoccupying enough that the angel waited with the artifact to give both brothers a thorough report on it before leaving to acquire the necessary components to securely store or destroy it.

Therefore, knowing that he had gone to bed with Castiel stroking his hair and softly reading The Wizard of OZ aloud as he fell asleep, Sam was only mildly concerned to wake up alone. That concern increased as he shuffled out the door towards the kitchen and became aware of Dean's voice raised in aggression and the growl of Castiel answering him. Castiel's voice sounded a little off, too, and there was an added layer to the subharmonics that Sam had started being able to hear after their Bond was solemnized that meant his mate was getting very frustrated with whatever Dean was complaining about. Sam tried not to groan - it was too early to play mediator! - but he scrubbed his hands over his face and forced his feet to carry him the rest of the way into the kitchen.

"Morning, Dean. Morning, Cas," Sam yawned, peering through the fall of his hair at his brother and his mate. Dean looked almost comical, caught between murderous and baffled as he stood on one side of the kitchen holding a frying pan up in a threatening gesture. Castiel, on the other hand, looked more tired than anything, arms crossed and eyes blinking slowly, the agitated ruffle of feathers in those massive wings smoothing out and fanning open in welcome as Sam approached. Blue eyes met his and Sam obligingly ducked his head to greet his mate with the silently requested kiss as they usually shared. "So what did you find in the store rooms this time?"

"What the hell, Sam?!" Dean exploded, waving his frying pan in a wide arc. "That ain't Cas!"

"I think I'm capable of recognizing my own mate, jerk," Sam huffed as he rolled his eyes, though now that he thought about it the body fitting itself neatly against his side did feel slighter than the late Jimmy Novak, and there hadn't been the familiar tickle of stubble against his chin when they had kissed. Had he needed to duck his head more than usual? Sam turned back to Castiel and made himself really focus, filtering through the sight of his mate's upturned Face to look at the flesh and bone form Castiel wore. He blinked. "New vessel, or something in the Bunker?"

"As I was attempting to explain to Dean," Castiel said with a huff that Sam absently noted sounded a lot like him only higher in pitch, "The artifact I encountered in the third most store room last night has altered my physical appearance. I would speculate that it also has an external dissociative component to the enchantment as, despite being told repeatedly who I am, he continues to disbelieve me."

"And I recognize you because...?"

"You are not attempting to identify me by my physical appearance," Castiel explained, one hand gesturing up and down to indicate the changed stature and gracefully feminine curves Sam could just make out beneath the T-shirt and sweatpants that had been borrowed for bed the night before. "This does not confuse you because you rarely look at my Vessel anymore, and the enchantment was only enacted upon a physical level."

"Makes sense," Sam nodded. Bonding with Castiel had given him the ability to perceive his mate's True Form, and after the initial adjustment to seeing the huge wings and Castiel's real, actual Face, Sam had gotten used to just seeing Castiel instead of "Castiel in his Jimmy suit", as Dean put it. Speaking of his brother, Sam looked over at Dean and raised his eyebrows. "Dude, relax. If you can't bring yourself to believe this really is Castiel, can you at least trust that I wouldn't be this comfortable around a complete stranger?"

"Fair enough," Dean admitted after a moment of silence, lowering the frying pan. "So what do we do to fix this and get Cas back?"

Sam looked back down at Castiel, who... winced.

"There was a manual, of sorts, for the artifact," the angel admitted, bringing one hand up to shove back through much longer than usual dark hair. "The language was rather frustratingly euphemistic and, predictably, rather outdated by modern standards, but the purpose and properties of the artifact were cataloged."

"So, a very old artifact, clearly if euphemistically labeled, possibly made by the Men of Letters themselves, and changes the physical sex of a person's body with an added dissociation element to not connect the new body fully with the original person," Sam summarized with a thoughtful frown. There was an answer there, one his still-tired brain wasn't quite able to reach for, and that clearly made Castiel uncomfortable to talk about. Coffee was definitely still needed, because at this rate he wasn't going to be much help.

"Oh, shit," Dean muttered, the frying pan falling to the floor from his abruptly lax grip with a loud clang. "Don't tell me it's a sex thing!"

"Very well," Castiel deadpanned, and fell silent.

"Oh come on!" Dean groaned when it became obvious what Castiel was doing. He scrubbed a hand over his face and bent to pick up the frying pan. "Okay, fine. Freaky sex totem for a bunch of repressed research nerds who took the Men of Letters part too seriously for too damn long. How do we reverse it?"

"The artifact is designed to reverse itself within forty-eight hours, provided the person... affected... engages in coitus within that time frame," Castiel explained stiffly. "Otherwise, the condition will persist for a further week, and then another further week until the sexual requirement has been fulfilled. The purpose of the artifact was not meant for a permanent transformation, but was intended for purely recreational purposes."

There was a moment of silence while both Sam and Dean processed that statement, that Castiel was going to be stuck in this enchantment-altered body until that body was used for sex. Well, Sam thought, there was the possibility of going out and finding a different vessel, leaving the enchanted body of Jimmy Novak empty and female in the Bunker-- nope, that wasn't going to work, for more reasons than just Castiel's preference to retain a vessel that had been released completely without an attendant soul being taken from his or her life. So, sex it was, even though Castiel was asexual and Sam--

At length, Dean heaved a heavy sigh and said what best summed up the situation. "Well, fuck."

[zalia]

Ghost Synapse is STILL one of my favorites of yours, even with you deliberately targeting me right in the feels and the heartstrings with perfectly answered requests and gift fics, THAT ONE grabbed my attention well before I knew you or your other works, and it changed my brain chemistry and still fascinates me (and what do you know whupps I went to go find it and double-check the name and got stuck reading it AGAIN). It is so strange and abstract and the meeting of incompatible bodies and nearly incompatible minds is so striking and just WILD to me. I love it. I don't know if I can call it a comfort fic because there is nothing comforting about it, but it is one of my long-standing favorites ever and I come back to it on the regular. <3

God, me finally catching up with things XD I am so so glad you like that one! It was kind of written on a whim as a challenge to myself to see if I *could* do it (since this was before Seraph so no exo body for the Wardaddy yet XD). I think Rasputin and Osiris are so similar in so many ways – they both feel like they are responsible for the entirety of humanity and keeping the universe running, they're both not the greatest with understanding people on an emotional level, and both of them have this deep need to be *understood*. I know it is most likely coincidence, but there's also the poetry connection! They both use it as a way of trying to process their feelings and connect with people, and it's kind of...the one thing they both do where they allow themselves to be imperfect.

I just really love the idea of them being able tosee each other entirely, just for a moment, and coming to some realisation and accord.

[aquarichor]

Hello!! I hope you don't mind this ask, feel free to delete if it bothers you!!

I was wondering, how does one find out about what pronouns they like? And how have you found yours? It's genuine because I find it very interesting that you found your own pronouns with zey/hy and all!!

And also so confusing because of my own gender journey which I'm still exploring 😭

OKAY NO THIS ACTUALLY MAKES ME SO HAPPY I WOULD LOVE TO ANSWER!!! NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR BEING CURIOUS AND EXPLORING YOURSELF!!!

Okay so I have a lot more going on than just having neopronouns and xenogenders, as I am an endel/alterhuman and fictionkin. I won't get too much into me being an otherkin, since it's not necessarily gender related, but if you want to know more, then feel free to ask!

As for my neos and xenos, heres a somewhat cohesive list of all of them:

neos:

zey/zem/zeir/zeirs/zemself

hy/hymn/hymns/hymns/hymnself

ve/vem/vys/vys/vemself

alt/altself

sun/sunself

angel/angelself

cloud/cloudself

chaos/chaosself

xenos:

Humanish, coined by magitoki

Mascentity, coined by mogaihoard (iirc the original coiner for mascbeing is no longer on tumblr?)

Scribblespectric, coined by crystalcoiner

Clockworkmasc (cant find the person who coined this one...?)

I've collected these over the years as I got more comfortable and more well versed with neos and xenos. As for how I got my first preferred set, zey/zem, it actually started with the commonly used/seen ze/zir! Over time, I had morphed it into being zey/zem (adjacent to they/them) because it felt more right. I've been using zey/zem for nearly 2 years now! Hy/hymn was actually pretty recent and it was during a conversation about one of my ocs, Seraph. We had talked about how it'd be silly if an angel-coded character used hy/hymn pronouns and that's when I remembered how much I loved the concept of not-quite-right angels (thank you Mandela Catalogue, you forever haunt my personal narrative) and that I also would love to identify with hy/hymn! I don't quite remember how i got ve/vem/vys, but I do know that it is adjacent to he/him/his (as is hy/hymn).

Now I don't really use my nouns (noun/nounself) nor do I tell people to use them. Actually, I never force anyone to use any of my neos! If someone doesn't want to use them, for any reason, I simply say "just use he/it for me then!" My nouns are more personal identifiers for me, but the way they're perceived can vary from person to person!

As for xenogenders, finding xenos (and neos) are both a bit difficult when you don't know where to look, me personally, I found myself in a discord server from tiktok that was centered around neos and xenos. I was able to talk to people and learn a lot more about the community, as well as collect more neos/xenos. There are a lot of coiners (people who make xenogenders) here on tumblr, and you can definitely start by looking through some of the tags I'll be using on this post! You can also go to the accounts linked above to find some you like!

I also have a really extensive neopronouns list saved to my bookmarks that can give you some ideas! You can also make your own! There's no need for you to use ones already created; the whole point of neopronouns is for them to be new and special to you. (neo means new in latin, funnily enough, so neopronouns directly means new pronouns!!) Your neos don't need to be connected to any of your xenos, and you don't have to identify with any xenos to use neos, and vice versa!

I get really happy when people ask me about my journey with neos and xenos, so sorry for yapping so much, and I hope this helps a lot!!

[eveningstar1516]

Rise of the Demon King ~ Chapter 7

Rise of the Demon King

Fic: Multi Chapter Paring: MC x Everyone (Mostly Lucifer) Type: Angst with a Happy Ending Total Word Count: 26,758 TW: Major Character Death, Reader gets stabbed with a sword through their chest so..., Abusive Parents, Past Child Abuse, Demon Hunters, Loss of Control Summary: You’ve done it. You’ve finally done it. You’ve managed to anger the demon king. Now you hold your head high as he hands down your sentence. AO3 Portal: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27065362

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Previously:

As he walked through the halls towards his next class, he made a vow to himself to try and feel that unfamiliar emotion until he could name it, then keep feeling it, because, for Satan, it felt like Y/N was right next to them, with their signature smile on their face, proud of him for focusing on a feeling opposite of his wrath. Should he start to feel his wrath taking over, he would picture Y/N, holding his hand, encouraging him to feel that unfamiliar emotion. One he soon learned was called ‘Philia Love’.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

CHAPTER 7 - Virtue of Loyalty (4265 words)

Our trip to the palace was a quiet one. Michael didn’t seem to want anything to do with me since he flew quite fast and left me behind multiple times as I'd never flown before and flying was extremely difficult. No one offered any assistance so I tucked my wings away, which I managed to figure out how to do after I accidentally did so mid flight, and ran under him. Looking straight ahead after confirming that I was keeping pace with Michael, I spotted the Celestial Palace. My jaw dropped in awe as I ran. The thing was massive! At least 2.5 times the size of Diavolo’s castle and even more decorative. The white walls were adorned with varying shades of golden accents making the palace seem larger than it really was. As I got closer, I learned that it was sitting in the middle of a massive garden that was overflowing with different kinds of celestial plants and trees. Although both the palace and garden seemed to be overflowing with decorations, everything still fit perfectly and was quite pleasing to the eyes.

Approaching the marble steps of the palace as Michael landed in front of me, greeting some gardeners as they stopped and bowed their heads to him. Signalling for them to resume their work, he continued up the steps motioning for me to follow. Taking a deep breath to calm my nerves, I followed him looking as unfazed as possible. Upon entering I found that the outside of the palace does no justice to the massive interior. Abandoning plan to remain as neutral and unfazed as possible, I gazed in absolute awe at the decor, my mouth opening slightly. There were no lighting fixtures as massive windows lined the wall letting in more than enough sunlight through. A massive chandelier was located in the center of the room with golden and silver chains decorating it. The marbled floor also had silver and gold accents as a beautiful floral pattern was outlined. Hearing a chuckle behind me, I turned to see Michael looking at me with a smug smile on his face.

“Well how can you not expect me to be amazed by all this?!” I countered while spinning and gesturing around the room.

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Your smug smile said it all Mike” I flashed him a wicked smirk of my own as I called him by the nickname. His face darkened significantly as his tone dropped to what would have been a dangerous level had I not have spent my life with demons. It just didn’t have the same undertones as Devilish.

“Watch yourself child”

Giving him an exaggerated mock bow I responded.

“My humble apologies Sir Michael. I will be sure not to repeat the same error in the future.”

“Very funny.” He scoffed and walked off. I got up and followed him through the palace until we stopped between two massive golden doors to what I assumed to be the throne room. Michael addressed himself and stated that he brought me with him. 2 angels donning Celestial armour opened the doors. Michael walked in with his head slightly bowed and his gaze lowered. I walked looking straight ahead as I subtly took the room in. It wasn’t as big as I expected it to be. A golden carpet leading from the door to the throne was the most extravagant thing in the room. In contrast to the rest of the palace, the throne room was quite modest. Even the throne wasn’t extravagant, built for comfort instead of elegance. God himself looked to be a 6’8 man in his late fifties with chestnut coloured hair and a neatly trimmed beard. He wore a simple white robe with gold accents. His eyes, a light blue colour, were emitting a slight white glow as we approached. Michael stopped a short distance from the throne and kneeled.

“Father, I have brought Y/N on your orders.”

“Thank you my son.” He turned to look at me.

“Y/N, you have caused quite the commotion in the 3 realms.”

I kept my tone playful as a polite smile made itself home on my face as I spoke with God.

“What can I say Father, trouble likes to follow me, wherever I may be.”

“That may be my child, although I am quite confused as to how you ended up here especially as a seraph. In case you didn’t know, that position must be earned here in heaven, so please explain to me, why I shouldn’t forsake you and have you fall to the Devildom?” He raised his right eyebrow and relaxed into his throne as he asked his question.

“Oh make no mistake, I didn’t want to come here in the first place, had I actually had a choice, I would have gone to the Devildom where I belong. Unfortunately, circumstances never seem to be on my side.”

“That still doesn’t explain how you came to be here, in that attire nonetheless.”

“Does it upset you that I come donning Lucifer's clothing and wings? I assure you, I didn’t have a say in my appearance. I am only staying here as long as necessary after all. I still wish to fall and return to my family.”

“Tell me child, how is it that a human finds comfort in the likes of demons rather than angels?”

“Whoever said I didn’t find comfort in angels? I find Simeon and Luke to be quite comforting whenever I get stressed with this whole 3 realms stuff. I just find the darkness of the Devildom more appealing as you and I both know what lurks underneath this “bright” soul of mine.”

“And yet you came here to me, why?”

“I presume you know the details regarding my untimely end?”

“Yes I am, although you weren’t due to perish yet, I do not dictate the souls within the Devildom realm. What of it?”

“I sacrificed myself for the brothers whom I have grown to call family so that they may continue to live despite being ruled by a tyrant whom you rivel for the title of “Devil””

“Watch what you say child! You are still addressing Father and not some random person off the street!” Ignoring Michael, I continued.

“I do not wish to return to the Devildom while it is ruled by King Abandon.”

“Child, I am aware of your relationship to the brothers as well as your loyalty to those you call family. I am also aware of the feelings you have for my eldest son. I ask you, has anyone told you about his duties while he was serving me?”

“Yes, Simeon and his brothers would speak about his time here as the leader of the council. Lucifer himself preferred not to talk about it but he answered my questions whenever I asked. I have also learned his work habits and often aided him whenever an overflow of work had come in due on a short notice.” God seemed to contemplate something. With a thoughtful look on his face, he addressed me.

“I have a proposition for you. You wish to fall and reunite with your family in the Devildom. I do not wish to have you up here, although you do not want to serve King Abandon.”

“That is correct.”

“I will grant your wish on one condition. I will allow you to return to the Devildom after Abandon’s reign is over, on the condition that you take Samael’s position on the council. You are to take over his responsibilities without attempting to sabotage the realm or abuse your power. Should you not be able to meet my expectations, or should you abuse your position, I will cast you out regardless of who is currently ruling the Devildom.”

Michael, who had stayed silent while his Father was speaking, was shocked by God's proposition.

“Father, are you sure this is the right way to go? Y/N doesn’t even belong here. Are you sure trusting them with Samael’s old position is a good idea?”

“Do you disagree with my judgment Michael? Do you believe me incapable of determining Y/N’s fate in my realm?”

Michaels face visibly paled as he realized the implications of his words. Bowing his head in mortification he answered his Father.

“‘O-of course not Father! I just don’t think that Y/N is qualified or ready to lead the council. They are unaware of how the Celestial realm operates and doesn’t have the experience that Samael possessed.”

Scratching his chin, God thought about Michael's words.

“You’re right Michael, you and the rest of the council as well as Simeon and Luke shall serve as their guide during their time here. You are to teach them how we operate and train them as to how to properly fulfill Samael’s role. You are to step down as the leader of the council once they have learned how to fill in the role themselves.”

Not being able to object to his Father's words, Michael agreed, although he tried to hide it, you could see how he clenched his teeth, obviously disapproving the entire idea and his new role as your babysitter.

“How about it Y/N, will you accept my proposal?”

“I have a few conditions of my own I’d like to add. I will accept on the condition that I return as soon as Diavolo is crowned king, no later and that other than the obvious changes that come with falling, no other changes will be made to me. I will follow your rules while I am up here and will serve you as long as it doesn’t result in any harm coming to the Devildom or Earth and their inhabitants. I will fulfill my role as Lucifer’s replacement during my time here, no more, no less.”

“Of course, that goes without saying. I will also add that you are to have no contact with any being outside my realm during your time here. We wouldn’t want anyone coming up here to retrieve you before our deal has ended now would we?”

“No, we wouldn’t. I accept your proposal to be Lucifer’s replacement until the time comes for Diavolo's crowning. Until then, I shall serve you and the council to the best of my abilities.” I stepped closer and kneeled before him as he sealed the deal.

“Alright then, as you are no doubt aware, each angel on my council represents a virtue. You shall as well. While Humility does not suit you quite right, I shall grant you a new virtue. One that could be considered a sin should it be applied incorrectly. I think you’d like that. Rise Y/N, Virtue of Loyalty.”

I rose to my feet as an invisible force caused my wings and halo to appear. They glowed a light blue as whatever magic God was using to tie me to the Celestial realm ran its course. Once the glowing dimmed down, I tucked my wings back in and bowed my head once more towards the being I now served for the time being and exited the throne room, making my way back to the House of Honors with Michael close behind. As we reached the front door, Michael turned me around. A hard and unforgiving expression on his face. A look of outright hatred in his eyes.

“Listen Y/N, just because Father has accepted you into the Celestial realm, doesn’t mean the rest of us have. You are still an outsider and I frankly do not trust anyone who has spent so much time around demons. I will follow Father’s orders in training you, but know this, Y/N, if I so much as suspect you of doing anything to upset the balance in the Celestial realm, if you hurt any of the angels here, I will take matters into my own hands. I will not allow a being as tainted as you to wreak havoc among the angels. Am I understood?”

Meeting his gaze, a smile made its way to my face as I responded.

“I will hold you to that.”

He took one last hard look at me and walked through the door. Left alone on the steps, I thought to myself, ‘Soon my demons, I’ll be back, soon’. I walked to the gardens and spent the next few hours tending to it until dinner.

In the Devildom. After they lost Y/N

As soon as they got home, Mammon went straight to Y/N’s room. How could he let this happen? He was their first damn it! He should have protected them, he should have stopped Lucifer, he should have done something! He entered Y/N’s room and immediately sat on their bed, made messily in their excitement to meet the king. He held their pillow, hugging to his chest as he started crying. Too lost in his own thoughts, he didn’t hear Asmo following him. Upon entering the room and seeing the state his older brother was in, Asmo put aside his own grievances and sat next to Mammon and embraced him, letting him cry on his shoulder. This reminded Asmo of a time in the Celestial realm. They were playing with Levi in the gardens when Levi tried to show off his tree climbing skills. As he was nearing the top, Mammon noticed the branch Levi was climbing looked ready to snap. He tried to warn Levi but was too late as the branch snapped and Levi fell. Mammon wasn’t fast enough to catch him. Levi ended up dislocating a wing and spraining his right shoulder. Asmo remembered walking by Mammon's room that night and heard quiet sobs, he knocked and opened the door revealing Mammon sitting on his bed, hugging his pillow crying. He sat next to his older brother and hugged him, assuring him that it wasn’t his fault and that Levi would be just fine. Coming out of the memory, Asmo did the same now, hugging Mammon and reassuring him that it wasn’t his fault. He couldn’t have stopped Y/N from giving that order and that everything will be ok.

“Will it be though? It just won’t be the same without them.”

“I know. It will be hard, Y/N was our family, but we’ll be there for each other.”

They slept together, holding each other in Y/N’s bed comforting each other until they fell asleep.

Present

It was an ordinary day for Mammon. He had just gotten back from a modelling gig at Majolish and was thinking up ways to spend the money he just earned. He was thinking of treating himself to a night out as he’d also gotten a math test back that day and passed with a 90%! Just as he was thinking about where to go, he felt the pull of a summoning. Mammon opened his eyes to find himself in an old cold basement. He scanned the room noting that the only lighting provided was a small bulb with a pull down string in the middle of the room and 3 small candles near the summoning circle. He found that the room was practically empty save for a thin mattress in a corner and some stairs leading to a door. He then spotted the one who summoned him, a little girl. She looked to be no older than 5. She was wearing stained and ripped overalls, one of the straps was missing. A light pink t-shirt underneath. Her brown hair was relatively short, only reaching her shoulders and was a tangled mess. Upon looking closer, Mammon noticed that she was covered head to toe in bruises and there were deep scratch marks on her arms and legs. He looked at the hastily drawn circle under him and found out that she drew it with some chalked rocks. She held an old summoning book close to her chest. Her big brown eyes looked so scared, yet if he looked closer, he could see what looked to be hope sparkling in the background. He could tell by looking at her that she held vast magical potential. Whoever put her here obviously knew the same.

“A-are you Mammon?” By Diavolo, she sounded so broken, like if he spoke too loud, she would shatter. Kneeling down to her level, Mammon put a soft smile on his face.

“Yes I am. What’s your name?”

“Cynthia”

“Ok Cynthia, what can I help you with.” Mammon doesn’t know what it was about the little girl, but he found himself genuinely wanting to help her. Maybe it was the way they looked at him with hope. Maybe it was because they were just a kid, or maybe, it was because her eyes reminded him of Y/N’s.

“I want to leave. My parents locked me in here. They don’t care about me. They only use me for their spells. Please Mammon, help me. I’ll give you my soul if you want, just please!” Tears came to her eyes as she pleaded with him to help her. Mammon upon hearing what these sorcerers were doing with their daughter, became enraged. He held his hand out to Cynthia with a smile on his face. He took the book from her hands and put it on the ground next to him.

“No, no, no. I won’t take your soul. It’s alright Cynthia, I’ll help ya. Why did you think I’d need your soul to help you?” “That’s what my parents said. They’ve been using me to try and summon you. I heard them arguing about who’s soul they would give to form a pact. Then they decided that they would give you mine.” Mammon didn’t think he could get madder, but by now, he was seeing red. Not only did her parents lock her up, they used her to try and summon him thinking he’d just accept a child’s soul to form a pact with them! Mammon was beyond angry.

“Don’t worry Cynthia, the Great Mammon will take care of your parents! You’ll be out of here in no time.” Sensing his rage Cynthia grabbed onto his legs before he made it to the stairs.

“No, don’t hurt them!” Mammon looked down at the girl in shock.

“Please don’t hurt them. They may have done all these awful things to me but they’re still my mom and dad! I don’t want you to hurt them, just get me out of here!” Mammon looked at the girl like she’d gone crazy. Her parents, who have locked her up in a basement, used her for spells, hell even tried summoning him in exchange for her own soul, she wanted them alive?! He saw how genuine she was being and he couldn’t find the heart to say no to her. Instead, Mammon knelt down to her level and took her hand. Cynthia looked at him with tears threatening to overflow. Mammon brought his other hand to cup her face, wiping away a stray tear with his thumb.

“Ok Cynthia, I won’t hurt them. I am mad at your parents for doing this to you, but if you don’t want me to hurt them, I won’t.” Mammon then brought Cynthia’s right hand to his mouth and kissed the back of it gently. A yellow seal formed on the back of her right hand and a matching pink one on the palm of Mammon's right.

“Now we have a pact Cynthia. I didn’t take your soul, I took your sadness. Did you know that demons could also take emotions to form a pact?”

“N-no. Does this mean you’ll take me far away from here?”

“Yes, and it also means that you won’t ever feel sad again. I know a nice witch who can take care of you. She will teach you how to use and call me with the pact. This way, whenever you’re in trouble, you will be able to summon me without drawing the circle again and I can come protect ya.”

“O-ok.” Mammon then picked Cynthia up and walked up the stairs, kicking the basement door down he walked through the house towards the front door. Before he reached it though, he heard a scream behind him. He noticed that Cynthia tensed considerably in his arms as he set her down, hiding her behind his legs. He turned around coming face to face with a middle aged couple who he preserved to be Cynthia’s parents. Her mom then yelled at Cynthia.

“Cynthia Maxwell Daemon! You come here right this instant!”

“Shut your mouth lady. She doesn't belong to you anymore.”

“Nonsense! She’s my daughter. She is mine to do with what I want!” Mammon's patience was running out. A scowl appeared on his face as he growled out.

“Listen here lady, I’ve got some choice words for you two that I wouldn’t care to say in front of the girl, but the fact that you thought you could summon me and exchange her soul for a pact with you? You're crazy to think I’d ever accept that kind of pact. Now Cynthia and I are leaving and you ain’t ever using her again!”

Cynthia’s parents then realized who they were talking to and their attitudes immediately changed.

“Please forgive us, Lord Mammon. We hadn’t planned for the girl to summon you. We apologize for the inconvenience the child caused you. If you would stay, we could reimburse you for your troubles.” Cynthia’s father bowed his head as he addressed Mammon. Mammon on the other hand outright laughed at that statement. Turning into his demon form he barked out

“You think her summoning me was an inconvenience?! You two are crazier than I thought! Now listen here and listen closely, neither of you are to come near or look for her. None of you are going to use her again. We are leaving and don’t ever bother trying to summon me again. Ya know, you should thank Cynthia. If she didn’t plead with me not to hurt either of you, you’d both be dead. Make no mistake, if either of you try to summon me or if I find you anywhere near her again, I will rip your hearts out and feed you to Cerberus. Kapeesh?” The dark undertones of Mammon’s voice got through to Cynthia’s parents as their faces paled in fear and they quickly agreed. They begged for his forgiveness and promised not to harm Cynthia again if he could just stay awhile. Not bothering with them anymore, Mammon picked Cynthia up and walked out, flying towards the one witch he’d ever trusted. When he landed, he realized that Cynthia was crying.

“Sorry Cyn, I didn’t scare ya, did I?”

“A-a little, but these aren’t scared tears. I’m happy. Thank you for getting me away from them and for letting them live.”

“Of course. The Great Mammon keeps his promises.” Mammon walked up to the door of the small cottage. He knocked and a young witch with long blond hair, green eyes, and freckles answered the door.

“Mammon what a surprise! What brings you here?” She opened the door gesturing for him to come in.

“Sorry, not today Kelly. I’m actually here for her.” Mammon stepped aside, revealing a scared Cynthia behind him.

“Oh my Diavolo! What happened to you, you poor girl?!” Kelly rushed forward cupping Cynthia’s chin as she inspected her body, taking in all the bruises and cuts.

“Kelly, this is Cynthia. She summoned me to save her from her parents. I was wondering if ya could take care of her. I know ya've always wanted a kid, so…”

“Of course! I could never turn someone in need away, especially a girl as cute as her.” She said while pinching Cynthia’s cheeks. Cynthia giggled in response.

“Ok then, Cynthia, Kelly here’s gonna take care of you. I promise that she won’t act like your mom and she will help you learn how to use both your magic and your pact.” Reaching into his pocket, Mammon pulled out the Grimm he’d earned that day. He then put them into Cynthia’s palm.

“Here ya go kid. Now if you ever visit me, you’ll have some money to spend.” Mammon turned to leave when he felt a tug on his sleeve. He looked down to see Cynthia pulling him down to the ground. He crouched down. Cynthia then kissed his cheek, giving him one of the Grimm he’d given her.

“Thank you Mammon.” She then ran behind Kelly’s legs and waved goodbye with a massive smile on her face.

It’s been a couple years since Mammon saved Cynthia. She’d grown to be a strong and skilful sorcerer. He’d visit her often over the years with something in tow for her. Mammon never spent the Grimm that Cynthia gave back to him on that day. Whenever Mammon had a tough time with the numerous witches he’d find himself in debt with, he’d always find his way to her, and she comforted him, never asking for more than his company, something he was more than happy to give. His brothers would always know whenever he went to see her as he’d always come back with a content smile on his face. Deep down, he wished that Y/N could’ve met Cynthia. They would have made great friends as they were the only 2 people who could make him smile like this. Mammon may not have been able to save Y/N, but he swore that he would protect Cynthia, no matter the cost.

[a-court-of-healing]

Loving you Through it Chapter 3 Jace Herondale X Reader

Three days. Three days of pure hell. It was already terrible to be in your head, but now there hasn’t been any relief, even with your emergency anxiety medication. The morning after he died, you made an early therapy appointment with Dustin to see him that day. He tried to get you to talk about it, but all you could do was talk about frivolous things and pace around his room. He was very understanding and he gave you a homework assignment to try and express your emotions and he gave you a harder assignment: to try and talk to Jace about it. After you could breathe again, you were able to use the navigation rune to find Dean’s body. He wasn’t meant to go on rounds alone, none of us were meant to, especially if you had a parabatai. He shouldn’t have gone without you. He should have waited! The parabatai oath has been on rerun in your head. 

“Entreat me not to leave thee,

Or return from following after thee—

For whither thou goest, I will go,

And where thou lodgest, I will lodge.

Thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God.

Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried.

The Angel do so to me, and more also,

If aught but death part thee and me.”

The guilt and shame won’t leave your system. I was meant to be there, protect him, guide him. You didn’t care if he was the older one. Usually he treated you as an equal, the only time he didn’t was when a) he thought he was right or b) he was angry, but he typically always used to apologize. Why would he go without me? Did he not trust you anymore? Did he think you were too broken to help? Or maybe too fragile and vulnerable right now? He thought you were good as long as you took your meds as you were supposed to, and you have! You have taken it religiously everyday. Right now, it hurts to do anything. You’ve run around with your head chopped off. You needed to take care of the funeral, because you were Dean’s only family. Everyone tried to help, but you demanded to do it. It was the least you could do for him...probably the last thing you’d be able to do for him. Today was the funeral. Most shadowhunters laid down on the pyre with a seraph blade in his right hand over his heart. Then, they would be put in the City of Bones. Some prefer to be put in Idris, but not Dean. He wasn’t raised there. He was raised in New York, and that is where he would stay. Everyone was getting ready, and Magnus and Alec had already arrived. Since you found out that Dean died serving the clave, they made an exception and allowed downworlders to attend. Both Alec and Magnus were concerned about you since you were with them when he was out dying. Joclyn, Luke, and Clary said they would meet us there. You were even surprised to see Maryse and Robert Lightwood here. Then again, you weren’t really that surprised because Dean was an extraordinarily talented shadowhunter. He was well known amongst the ranks, and so were you. You were called the parabatai storm for a reason. Dean taught you well, and so has Jace. You were numb for the most part by now. It was better than feeling. You didn’t want to feel at all, cause Angel knows it won’t be a positive emotion. You got into your lace holow flare sleeve A Line white dress and walked over to your vanity. You put on your perfume and picked up your brush. You started brushing your hair slowly, feeling this hollow hole in your chest. 

“Y/N...honey...it’s time to go.” A familiar warm, comforting voice filled the room. Jace. But I don’t want to go...I’m not ready. You continued to brush your hair and looked at the vanity and pretended you didn’t hear anything. 

“Love...did you hear me?” You can tell that he knows you heard him, but you were choosing not to hear him. 

“I don’t want to go Jace…” You actually answered honestly. That was the most sincere thing you’ve spoken since Dean’s death. You could hear Jace’s dress shoes as he walked across the room. He was dressed in a white vest. It was nice because if he wore a tux, it wouldn’t be Jace, and you could really use the normalcy. He squatted down next to your chair and started rubbing your shoulder gently. 

“Darling, speak to me?” You gasp softly as a rush of emotion runs through you and you shake your head. You began to pick at your nails, trying to cause some kind of pain to cause this agonizing emptiness to go away.  “I’m not ready...I’m not ready for him to go.” He looks down at your hands and notices you picking at your nails and puts his hands on yours and ripped your fingers from hurting yourself. 

“You're hurting yourself love...stop.” He whispered it to where only they could hear.You couldn’t look at him and you tried to pull your hands away so you could keep picking your fingers and he fought you back. He was obviously stronger than you were so it was easy to overpower you. He intertwined your fingers with his and he kissed the back of each hand. It then clicked in your head what you were doing and you immediately felt stupid and you couldn’t help the shame and humiliation that ran through you. You tried to pull away and he wouldn’t let you. 

“I know this is probably the worst time to even say this...but i know...I know you struggle with...um...hurting yourself. Don’t hate him, but Dean might have mentioned it. He was worried about you...I don’t know why, he didn’t tell me specifics. He didn’t tell me your history, he just hinted about this. He was worried about you because he couldn’t always be with you...but I think it’s important for you to know I know…and I’m here for the long run.” He smiled softly at you and panic filled you. How DARE DEAN!! He promised he would never tell a soul. But he did. You shook your head as you thought about it and he waited for you to calm down a little. His thumbs rubbed the back of your hands and he kept his gaze on you trying to gauge your reaction and emotions. There was a knock on the door and they both turned to look and find Alec there.

“I’m so sorry...but...we really need to get going…” You forced a smile and stood up forcing Jace to sit back. 

“Okay...thank you Alec for letting us know! I can’t be late.” You hadn’t realized you seeked out Jace’s hand but he squeezed it in a comforting way, letting you know he noticed and he was still there. 

You all arrive together and you stop dead in your tracks as you look at the front of the room. There on the pyre was my parabatai covered in a white sheet. You must have stopped breathing. When you finally exhaled, everyone was staring at you. You realized everyone was staring at you, waiting for your reaction, and it took every last inch of your being to throw on your biggest smile and walk down the aisle. Everyone took their seats while you took your rightful place next to the pyre. The Silent Brothers began the service and all you could think of was what if I had been there? He would still be alive. 

“The remaining will speak the name of the fallen.” You took a deep shuddering breath.

“Dean Matthew Whitelaw.”

“Ave Atque Vale.” Everyone spoke in unison and you bowed your head trying to keep all your emotions in check. The man leading the precession looked at you and walked to his seat and you walked up to the microphone and began to sing the song that was closest to how you were feeling, “The Next Right Thing.” 

“And, with it dawn, what comes then? When it's clear that everything will never be the same again.” You looked at Dean’s body and felt this overwhelming emptiness and grief overcome you.

“Then I'll make the choice to hear HIS voice. And do the next right thing.” For the first time in a long time, tears fell down your face as you finished the song and then led the very last sentence before Dean would be burned. 

“We are dust and shadows.” You held your hands to your chest hoping that you could maybe make this empty feeling to go away. You looked at the first two rows of pews and saw that everyone was crying as you spoke. You looked at where Dean was laid, pulled out your favorite seraph blade, put it in his right hand and stepped back. Then, they set him on fire and you stood and watched as your best friend, mentor, and parabatai burn. 

“Bye Dean.”

[theheartsmistakes]

The Last Night Part XXXI

It was worse than anything James could have imagined.

His shoulder was torn to shreds and reeked of blood from a Behemoth demon that snuck upon him while he was trying to behead a Raum demon, and there seemed to be no end to the snapping of teeth; leathery wings; the screeching, and screaming. The sun bled into a vibrant sunrise, the sky matching the gore in the streets.

Not only were they facing demons, but an army of undead soldiers flooded the streets. An army that Belial called forth with Lucie's power.

And for being dead for centuries, they were surprisingly difficult to kill.

James sprinted, his breath sharp as a knife in his chest.

He’d run out of throwing knives, wasting no time to retrieve them after they’d found their mark in a demon’s skull or vital organ, dropping to the ground after they’d returned to the realm of which they came. It seemed when one died, two returned in their stead. No, there was no wasting time. He drew a pair of curved blades, glowing with angelic power, from his belt and sliced through the belly of a demon that swooped for him, knocking it off-kilter, and brought the twin to the blade down in another arch over the neck of the beast.

Another was on him before the first could disappear. Ichor sprayed his face as he buried his blade to the hilt into the jaw of a demon, its blackened teeth scrapped against his hand as he drew the blade back out. Its lifeless eyes widened and then closed as it slumped to the ground.

Still, he ran, working his way towards the bridge where Cordelia ran to save Lucie. Creating a path for her and buying her time to figure out a way to separate her from Belial.

Another demon launched from a rooftop, curved claws reaching for him—

James swiped his sword, splitting the demon’s molding green skin from gut to neck. It crashed into the stones behind him, legs outstretched beneath it, twitching slightly. He climbed atop of it, gaining the clearance he needed to see Cordelia embracing Lucie on the bridge.

She’d made it. A little longer— that was all she needed. Just a little longer. He could give her that— he would give her that. It wouldn’t be long now.

The demon flinched beneath him. He stuck the point of his blade into the base of its neck, not taking his eyes off of Cordelia and Lucie, as he slid the blade all the way in. The beast spasmed beneath him until he jerked the sword backward and severed the head from the spine. He landed deftly on his feet as the demon disappeared out from underneath him.

Behind him, his friends fought as a team. Christopher and Anna paired up against a humanoid demon with the body of a man, except for the obsidian skin and the talons that grew from each finger and the leathery wings that sprung from its back. They had it cornered, one distracting it while the other attacked.

Thomas stood back to back with Alastair, fighting three lion sized demons.

Across the bridge, he knew his parents were fighting their way towards the bridge or attempting to keep Charles from executing Lucie before they had the chance to save her.

But Matthew, he could see Matthew. His parabatai rune blazed in his skin, the only indication that he was alive and not in peril, but it made him nervous not to be able to see him.

A demon surged at him from around a corner, taloned fingers gouging lines into the cobblestones, jaws open aiming for his throat. With its talons, it managed to cut through James’s forearm slashing through armor and skin. A groan tore from James as the pain seared through his arm, he released his blade on instinct and listened in horror as it clattered to the ground.

James managed to hurl himself backward from under the demon as it seemed to lick its mouth in anticipation of its kill. It leaked saliva on the ichor soaked streets as it advanced upon him. Seeming to savor every step.

Its last steps.

With his other blade pinned beneath him, James reached for a seraph blade at his thigh.

The demon sank onto its haunches, reading for the kill.

The ground shook behind him as James tightened his grip on the hilt, whispered its name, and aimed the blade upward—

Before he could strike, a sword plunged through the demon’s great gray head.

A vibrant glowing blade, that seemed to sing as it met the demonic blood. The demon evaporated with an audible hiss and disappeared as if on a breeze. A blond head appeared above James, streaked with black that also dripped down his face.

With a bloodied hand, Matthew offered it to James.

“Thought you could use some help.” His parabatai grinned.

“I had it under control,” said James, shaking the burn from the slashes on his arm.

Matthew’s eyebrows bounced. “Oh, my mistake. It looked like you were about to be the poor chaps breakfast.”

“Your mistake indeed,” said James and patted Matthew on the shoulder. “Where the hell are they all coming from?”

“The answer seems to lie within the question,” said Matthew with a wink. “Whatever Belial has done it seems that they’re able to regenerate at a faster rate. If we keep going on like this then we don’t stand a chance.”

“Always the optimist,” said James and threw the words over his shoulder. “Cover me!”

He barely heard Matthew’s reply of, “always,” before he ripped into an undead, with a quick scissor swipe of his blades that sent the beast’s head rolling. Gore splattered his gear, his face, but he made no hesitation as he ran towards the bridge.

Matthew kept to his word, ripping apart demon and undead with precision and vengeance that might have stunned James if his focus was not otherwise detained.

Another undead dragged its crooked ankle towards James, just as he flipped the blade in his right hand and split the creature’s skull in half. He whirled on another, but before he could dismember it, a flash of brilliant light and deafening thunder clapped overhead. The earth shuddered underneath his feet. He spun around and looked towards the bridge as a building on the other side of the Thames split in half.

His eyes found Lucie standing with her hands squeezing her head. Cordelia lay on the ground not far away, struggling to stand. He called her name— screamed it— begging her to get away.

An arm wrapped around his neck and he felt the sharp needle points of teeth dig into his trapezius muscle. He raised his elbow against a flash of searing pain and drove the end of his blade into the centre of the undead’s brain.

His shoulder spilled blood, but he hardly noticed as he started to run towards the bridge, to where Cordelia now stood running towards Lucie.

He yelled her name again as Lucie turned to face Cordelia at the same moment they impacted.

Cordelia’s name lodged in his throat once more as he watched them twist over the bridge railing and hurtle towards the black water beneath.

Lucie awoke in a field that reminded her very much of the one behind her family's estate in Alicante. The soft, lush green grass of spring tickled her bare arms as a docile wind blew through the hills carrying with it the smell of rain, crystal clear lake water, and earth. Lucie’s hand moved against the solid earth beneath her and looked up at the entire world above her, full of distant, burning lights.

Where the normal blue of the sky had gone, she wasn’t entirely sure, but it didn’t matter. None of it mattered now, she felt. For she was free.

The terrible, clawing darkness that had consumed her as soon as Belial dragged her into the centre of the star exploded the moment her body had given up underneath the water, Cordelia holding her against the savage need to take a breath. She’d saved them— in ending Lucie, she saved them all.

“Not quite, little huntress,” said a familiar, female voice.

Lucie peeled far enough away from the ground to look at the beautiful, angular, human face of the ghost that had visited her in the Shadowrealm. The dark hair spilled down from her head, no longer white and ghost-like, but full and glistening.

Some intrinsic part of her recognized this woman. An ancient song in her blood sang out to the woman before her.

Lucie’s eyes narrowed, “You— I know you.”

The ghost’s smile was soft. “Do you remember now?”

“You're Abigail,” said Lucie as a shudder went through her entire body. “You’re Abigail Shadowhunter. Part of the first three. You’re— this is— Oh, James is never going to believe—“ A realization dawned on her at the thought of her elder brother. “Am I dead then? Is it really over?”

“Not dead,” said Abigail as she crossed her arms across her chest. She was dressed oddly mundane for what she always imagined Abigail Shadowhunter to be dressed as. In Lucie’s mind, she would have looked more like a Viking princess rather than the old leather trousers, thick deerskin jacket, and white cotton blouse. She was beautiful: ancient angelic power radiated from her like the confidence in her kind expression. “Not dead yet. You’re somewhere we like to call, the in-between. Your brother has been here before, briefly. So has your mother and your uncle James, but they wouldn’t remember it, and neither will you.”

“But it’s you. This is really you?”

Abigail chuckled and peered at the churning darkness above them. “Yes. There isn’t much time, Lucie Herondale. Your mortal body is dead, but this does not have to be your end. You can choose to return to your family, your friends.”

Lucie’s expression deadened. “I can’t go back. He’ll find me. He’ll use me again. He’ll kill everyone that I love. Not to mention what the clave will do to me now that they’ve learned what I can do, what I am. No, it’s much better that I stay here and go with you.”

Abigail crossed her arms. “Better? Better for whom?”

“For everyone!” Lucie blinked rapidly. “Better for my family, better for my friends—“

“You truly believe the loss of their daughter is better for your parents,” said Abigail. “You believe the loss of a sister, a friend, a companion is better for their lives going forward. Lucie, the loss of you will shatter their entire world. They will carry that loss in their souls for the rest of their lives. Your memory will stop at a single moment for them and never change. Do you wish to leave them to the wonder what you might have looked like in your twenties, thirties, and beyond? The things you could have accomplished?”

Lucie bowed her head afraid that she might break clean apart. “No. No, I don’t want those things. I’m scared.”

“It’s all right to be frightened, Lucie,” said Abigail. “Everyone is afraid of something. Your parents are living their worst fear right now. Can you feel it? Their tether to you— like a string around your heart.”

Lucie placed a hand on her chest and felt the cold ache there like a massive hole. She nodded wordlessly and began crying.

“They’re begging every diety they know of to return the life to your body.” Abigail knelt in front of Lucie. “If only they knew it was your choice.” She gave her a knowing smile. “And what of the boy? The Blackthorn boy?”

Lucie wiped at her face. “What of him?”

Abigail’s smile turned gentle. “He was trapped in this space for many years without the ability to move beyond. We’ve all heard him speak about you— about getting back to you. Are you going to abandon the possibility of that future by staying here when he’s only just gotten his life back?”

Lucie’s breath shuddered from her chest. She’d thought it was a dream, some ploy created by Belial to get her to follow him, but it was true. Jesse was alive. Jesse was waiting for her.

She inhaled, staring at the grass that was not real. None of it was real. She’d contemplated staying in a place with things that looked and felt real but were not. Like living in the pages of a book, an image of real things. She’d give up life for this?

Lucie sniffed. “What do I need to do? How do I stop him once I’ve returned? How do I stop any of it?”

Abigail rose again. “Leave that to us.” Lucie’s gaze shifted from Abigail’s regal face to those behind her where a crowd began to form behind her, a legion of hundreds of faces, some Lucie recognized and many she did not. The man on Abigail’s right smiled at her, a kind mischievous smile that did not correlate with the serious renderings of him standing atop a pile of demons in a blaze of glory hanging up in the Institute. Jonathon Shadowhunter had his arms crossed much like his older sister, though he was much taller and more solidly built, and he looked—well, humored. An ancient blade sheathed his back.

To his right stood another man. Lucie recognized him as David, the parabatai to the warrior standing beside him. His gaze could old the power of thunder in it.

Behind the three, Shadowhunters of generations past marched up the hill to gather. A face stood out amongst the front line.

“Barbara!” Lucie yelled.

Her friend beamed, whole and vengeful.

Amongst the other fallen warriors, she could recognize her grandfather Edmond with eyes that mirrored her father’s, and though she’d never met her, from photographs her father had shared, she recognized her Aunt Ella who looked a bit like herself.

“So you see, Lucie Herondale,” said Abigail. “You will not be going alone.”

Lucie’s lips trembled. “How— how is this possible?”

“You make it possible,” said Abigail. “You and only you can control the dead. A gift that if bestowed upon some other hand might be catastrophic, but your heart is light and your motives pure and selfless. Therefore, with your command, we will listen.”

Lucie’s gaze snapped back. “You mean I’m to command them? You?”

“That is what I mean,” nodded Abigail. “And you must do it quickly. Time is running out. If you do not return soon then this is where you will remain.”

Lucie didn’t give herself a chance to reconsider, to rethink what would be waiting for her on the other side. She looked beyond Abigail’s shoulder at her fallen family and committed every one of their faces to memory. Perhaps she wouldn’t remember this moment when she awoke, but she’d honor them now.

“Okay,” said Lucie and returned to her feet. “I’m ready. Tell me what to do.”

Cordelia knelt over Lucie after having dragged her limp body to the shore through water that felt more like sand.

The fight blazed on around her. Demons swarmed the sky and the earth amongst the army of undead that Belial called to his aid; both of which were being kept back by warriors that were beginning to tire. It seemed it would never end. Never, never end.

But none of that mattered now. None of it.

Cordelia pressed her fingers to Lucie’s throat, knowing what she wouldn’t find.

“I’m sorry,” she sobbed at her friend’s lifeless face. “I’m so so sorry.”

With shaking hands, she pressed into Lucie’s chest: one, two, three. She swallowed a deep breath of air and blew into Lucie’s mouth.

Again, she pressed against Lucie’s chest cavity and could feel the liquid slosh around in her belly, her lungs.

One. Two. Three.

“Please,” she begged and gave Lucie another burst of air. “You can’t die. You can’t die. You. Cannot. Die.”

One. Two. Three.

Air.

A demon screeched above her as if careened through the sky, several arrows bursting from its chest as it drifted towards the Thames and landed into the water with an eruptive wave.

One. Two. Three.

Lucie’s lips were turning a startling shade of blue. Her skin was so cold as Cordelia pressed her fingers to her throat again.

Nothing. Not even a flutter.

“Come on!” Cordelia pleaded. One. Two. Three. Air. “Please! Please, this has to work. It has to." Her voice went to a whisper. "It has to.”

Tears streamed down Cordelia’s face and dripped onto Lucie’s as she gave her another breath. And began pumping her torso again, refusing to accept that her friend was gone. That her soul had left this world to a place that Cordelia could not pull her back from.

“You’re not finished,” said Cordelia, with a chest breaking sob. “You’re not finished yet. Do you hear me? We’re going to grow old together, you and I. We’re going to have that ceremony and we’re going become parabatai and then neither one of us will feel alone again. I promise, Lucie, but you have to breathe.”

A crack of lightning shimmered the sky above her. She felt the electricity through her bones, but she did not stop.

She was cold. Cold and wet and stiff.

A burning sensation in her chest climbed up her throat until she burst forward, expelling the waste from her lungs. It tasted like mud on her tongue. She felt as if she’d swallowed the whole Thames.

But she was breathing. Her heart was pounding in her chest— and she was breathing.

Arms, shaking cold arms were wrapped around her. A hand slammed into her back as she tried to breathe through the water and bile still trapped in her lungs.

She dimly registered that she was lying on the bank of the river. Cordelia crying into her ear and held her up to get the water out.

“Was that your idea of a rescue?” said Lucie, her voice sounded like she’d swallowed gravel.

Cordelia laughed and pulled away enough to look Lucie in the face. Blood covered Cordelia’s own, her blood or something else’s, Lucie could not tell. “It worked, didn’t it?”

Lucie coughed. “Barely. I may never get the taste out of my mouth.”

“It takes some time,” said Cordelia, fresh tears rolling down her cheeks, even as she laughed, “but it does go away. Believe me.”

She smiled at Cordelia and her friend smiled back. “Did you mean what you said? Will you really be my parabatai?”

Cordelia drew Lucie into another hug. Her clothes were wet and reeked of ichor and muddy river water, but Lucie didn’t mind. She hugged her dear friend back as if she were the tether keeping her stationed in this world.

“A promise is a promise.”

“Oh, but you already make such a wonderful team,” said a voice behind them. Lucie’s eyes shot open as she slowly peeled herself away from Cordelia to look at the archdemon standing on the muddy banks. “Why ruin it with semantics?”

Cordelia started to stand but Lucie gripped her arm.

His physical form flickered as if he were there, but not fully. Lucie suspected that was exactly the case. He’d started the transition from his own realm to this one, but it was not complete yet; therefore he could not fully take form, not without his host.

Lucie stood, her foot slipping on the muddy bank, but she held her ground.

“It’s over, Belial.” Lucie was about to say, but someone had already said it for her.

She turned and relief and pride and hope, filled her chest at Abigail standing on the banks. She’d returned to her ghostly form, but the centuries of rage still burned behind her eyes.  

“Abigail,” said Belial as his lips curled over his teeth. “So wonderful to see you again. It’s been too long.”

Demons and undead started to fall around them, taken down by the army of shimmering white figures that burst through their bodies with angelic light and sent them back to where they’d come from in bursts of mist.

An army— her army, flooded the streets and fought beside the living Shadowhunters, filling them with a renewed sense of hope.

“It has been too long,” said Abigail. In a flicker of light, the ghost moved forward and grabbed Belial by the throat. His form solidified for just a moment, long enough for Abigail to yell, “Now!” And for Lucie to pick up Cortana from the ground beside Cordelia and drive it into Belial’s chest, up through his sternum, and out his back.

His eyes and mouth widened as centuries of pain and torture flashed within them and Lucie saw all of it. Everything he’d done as the light began to burst from the cracks rippling through his skin, the blade at the centre of it.

Only a kin can kill an archdemon, Abigail had told her as she descended back to earth. Only a kin can have enough power. It must be you, Lucie.

The blade burned in her palm until she released it and fell backward onto the marsh and watched in horror as Belial screamed into an unknown void and then burst apart in a wave that took every demon and undead with him.

In the blast, Lucie was thrown back, her head hit the ground in a deafening crack. With no runes to help her, she succumbed to the blinding pain and fell once more into darkness.

Lucie was faintly aware of being hoisted into the air and the ground leaving her. Warmth pressed against her cheek where she laid it on something soft.

Whispering, hushed words were spoken into her ear and she was being rocked.

“Lucie, my Lucie,” said a voice. “You’re safe, my darling. I’ve got you. Papa’s got you.”

With what strength she had left, she wrapped her arms around her father’s neck and let him carry her home.

A/N: I don’t have any more words in me. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Let me know what you thought! Final chapter comes out in one week: Mon, 2/22

[destieltropecollection]

Destiel Trope Collection 2020 Day 10: Enemies to Lovers

It's a Match! | @suckerfordeansfreckles

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 2015 Main Tags/Warnings: pining, online dating, getting together Summary: Dean has seen the guy a handful of times, mostly at Charlie’s parties or when out and about with her — it’s only been six times that Dean is aware of, actually. Not that he counted. Well. He did, maybe, count a little. But that’s only because the guy is seriously gorgeous, and also seems to seriously hate Dean. Like, frowns and dark stares and leaving the room when Dean enters it. And that is most definitely the only reason why Dean keeps track of their meetings. It has nothing to do with the fact that, for whatever stupid reason, Dean feels all fuzzy and happy and warm around this stupid, scruffy, handsome, dark-haired and blue-eyed Cas-guy. Something about him just… does things to Dean’s head.

In The Ballroom | @gii-heylittleangel

Rating: General Word Count: 2594 Main Tags/Warnings: lovers to enemies to lovers, broken relationship, getting back together, false mentions of cheating Summary: The high school dance was useless in Castiel's opinion; there was nothing to do, people were incredibly annoying, and he would be alone. But, having Charlie Bradbury as his best friend, he had no choice but to go; after all, there was a tiny chance he would get tacos after the party. Castiel did not get tacos but he got something a lot better.

Ring a Bell for the Righteous Man | @pray4jensen

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 3003 Main Tags/Warnings: Enemies to Lovers, Royalty/Fantasy AU, Soul Bond, Marriage, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dubious Consent Summary: An hour passes and the prince doesn't bed him. Dean thinks that maybe the prince doesn't have any intention of doing it at all, and if that's the case, it'll be Dean who'll face the consequences. So, thumbing a finger down the length of Cas' wings, Dean taunts, ""I thought you promised Lord Alastair that I wouldn't be able to walk, your highness."" Dean pauses. ""Are you doubting yourself, my lord?""

Addicted | @verobatto-angelxhunter

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 3671 Main Tags/Warnings: Season 4/5 canon divergent, Destiel, slow burn, Badass! Castiel, first kiss, first time, explicit sexual content, canon typical violence. Summary: Dean can't get Castiel out of his mind. Everytime the angel is in front of him, is hypnotizing. He needs to know what is going on with him. Why Castiel is so irresistible? And why he feels that empty everytime the angel isn't near him.

the light of falling stars | @procasdeanating

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 4980 Main Tags/Warnings: Alien!Cas, wing fic, inspired by a movie (enemy mine) Summary: … when Lieutenant Dean Winchester and the two ships under his command engaged in combat with a Seraph squadron. Two army ships were destroyed, while one fighter, presumably Lt. Winchester’s, made a forced landing on a nearby uninhabited class D planet after triggering the emergency protocol. The ongoing search has not produced conclusive results. Lt. Winchester is classified as missing in action…

First Impressions | @suckerfordeansfreckles

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 7254 Main Tags/Warnings: hospital AU, ftm trans Cas, top surgery, mentions of medical stuff, sharing a room Summary: When Cas wakes for the first time after his surgery, there’s sunlight tentatively streaming through the window to his right. It takes him a while of uncoordinated blinking and thinking until he realizes where he is, why he’s here. And then the giddiness comes, sudden and overwhelming, when he looks down at his chest and there is none. The reality is almost too much to grasp and his hands shake a little when he tries to raise them to touch. He's happy, and giddy, and so thankful. And then a nurse wheels in his new roommate, one very obnoxious and flirty Mr. Winchester. Cas just... cannot wait to watch all of this play out.

The Galaxy's Most Wanted | @saltnhalo

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 10160 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Space Pirates, Enemies to Lovers, Blow Jobs, Frottage, Angry Sex, Sexual Tension Summary: Dean had been the one always up to mischief, running around with his father’s broken laser pistol and constantly getting into places he shouldn’t have been. Sam, in comparison, always seemed to be the smart, studious one – until he reprogrammed the AI in their neighbours’ house to play ‘Happy Birthday’ at the loudest possible volume while keeping all the doors and windows firmly locked. It had taken two experts seven hours to undo the coding that Sam had managed to integrate into the house’s programming. So, yes. They had been exceptional even from the beginning. And when John Winchester crossed one too many people, his sons inherited his beloved ship, and took to the cosmos doing what they knew best: stealing. And they were damn good at it too. Almost unrivalled, across their own galaxy and even those neighbouring. Almost.

Love Thy Enemy | @gii-heylittleangel

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 11887 Main Tags/Warnings: revenge planning, use of guns, major characters injury Summary: After being betrayed by the Men of Letters, Dean makes the most stupid, idiotic, and best decision of his life: ask Castiel Novak, his long time enemy, for help.

The Quest for the Demon King's Heart | @cr-noble-writes

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 12500 Main Tags/Warnings: fantasy au, demon king!dean, wood elf!cas, enemies to lovers, mutual pining, minor character death, major character injury, angry sex, angst with a happy ending Summary: In a fantasy land, Dean, the Demon King, goes to a distant guild to take a break from evil, where he meets a young adventurer, Castiel, on a quest to slay the Demon King. For fun, Dean helps and protects the adventurer, and affection grows between them. Then, they arrive at the gates of his castle.

A Virgin to Redeem the Billionaire | @notfunnydean

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 16660 Main Tags/Warnings: Manipulation, Emotional Manipulation, blackmailing someone into a relationship, Mentions of drug selling (not Destiel), Mentions of cheating (not Destiel), virgin!cas Summary: When Castiel meets Dean Winchester, the other man seems to be a real asshole. So it doesn’t surprise him, when Dean shows up again and this time blackmails Castiel in a horrible way. Castiel agrees to be his boyfriend, only to protect his family, but along the way he actually falls for Dean.

The Bakery | @dates-with-cas

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 41075 Main Tags/Warnings: angst with a happy ending, offscreen character death, enemies to lovers, workplace sex, semi-public sex, attempted rape/non-con, mentions of past sexual abuse, alcohol as a coping mechanism, sex as a coping mechanism, sex in a kitchen, unresolved past trauma, top!Cas, bottom!Dean Summary: Dean Winchester loves his job, and he's thrilled to have his boss' brother coming in to work over the holidays, that is until he meets Castiel Novak for himself. The man is picky, grouchy, and absolutely fucking gorgeous.

The Path Between the Stars | zaphodsgirl (AO3)

Rating: Mature Word Count: 53111 Main Tags/Warnings: AU - Labyrinth Fusion, Angst with a Happy Ending, Minor Character Death Summary: It's been almost fifteen years since Dean met the enigmatic goblin king, Castiel. After failing to complete the labyrinth with Sam to save baby Adam, Dean is forced to make a deal to secure their freedom. Five years ago he finally gave in to the feelings he’d been keeping at bay for some time, only for Castiel to disappear from his life completely without a word. When Dean relays the story of the labyrinth to Sam's girlfriend Eileen, an opportunity presents itself for him to get some answers...and maybe have a second chance at something he hadn't dared to believe was real.

Of Twists and Turns | @kitmistry

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 75080 Main Tags/Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Pirate AU, Implied Drug Use, Minor Character Death, Amputation, Sea Monsters, Hunter Dean Summary: When naval surgeon Castiel Novak is captured by the Black Impala pirates, he has no choice but to agree to their terms: He is to serve on their ship for a whole year before they release him. That doesn’t mean he is going to like it, though. Especially when their captain is the embodiment of everything Castiel despises. Determined to earn his freedom, Castiel settles into the life of an outlaw. When the pirates’ true goal is revealed, though, he can no longer deny that things are not as black and white as he thought they were. And he can’t deny how drawn he is to Captain Winchester either.

Sovereign | @pomegranatedaffodil

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 87974 Main Tags/Warnings: Arranged Marriage, Hate to Love, Fantasy AU, Royalty AU, Virgin Castiel, Switching, Slow Burn, Minor Injuries Summary: When his brother embarks on a risky venture, Prince Dean of Pellia’s only choice is to enter into a marriage with the king of Arxelle in order to save Sam’s life as well as his own. King Castiel is severe, aloof, and no more happy about their hasty wedding than Dean. Marital bliss is the last state either of them expects to reach, but as Dean spends more time in his new home, he and Castiel slowly begin to settle into a partnership that allows them to put the needs of their kingdom before their own feelings. The longer they spend together, though, the more those feelings develop, daring them both to wonder if they might ever be husbands in more than just name.

Shot Through The Heart | @peanutbutterjelly-pie

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 156327 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe, Men of Letters, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Humor, Case Fic, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Bottom Dean Summary: As a hunter Dean finds himself more often than not relying on the help of the Men of Letters. Most of the time that's not much of a problem - if it wasn't for Castiel, the smartass bookworm with the piercing blue eyes, the messy hair and the rude attitude. He's been an annoying thorn in Dean's side since day one - and the hunter doesn't see that change anytime soon.

[caranfindel]

Recap/review 15.17: “Unity”

THEN: Chuck is destroying all his worlds. Dean tricked Amara into going along with their plan. Empty!Meg is on Billie's side because she just wants to go back to sleep. (Don't we all, dear.) Billie wants Dean to be ready. Dean finally told Sam the truth and Sam was MAD.

NOW: Amara is enjoying a hot pool and a glass of wine in Reykjavik, Iceland. (She's pretending to read but there's no way she can see that book. Although I guess she could have super vision. Why not? And I'm sure the book itself is significant and maybe I'll look that up later but let's face it, I probably won't.) Her glorious view of the Milky Way is punctuated by what seems to be a falling star. But there are more and more and more and she knows what it really is. "Welcome home, brother."

Title card!

Bunker. Sam is on the phone with Cas, who just found out a possible lead in the "Basilica of Guadalupe" was useless. I wonder if he means the Basilica of Our Lady of Guadalupe in Mexico? A 35-hour drive from Lebanon? "That's all right," Sam says. "We'll find a way." {Sidebar: Eternal optimism or simple bullheaded refusal to accept the inevitable truth? Discuss.} Dean enters and asks if that was Cas, but Sam doesn't answer.

So, this is how it's gonna be? You're gonna give me the silent treatment?

I'm not sure what you want me to say.

That you get it. Like I said, killing Amara, Jack, dying, that's the only way.

Sam huffs and imitates Dean: "The only way. Our one shot. Our last chance. You ever get tired of saying stuff like that?" The guys are interrupted by a noise, and I'm just going to stop here for a minute, because I need to talk about Sam's anger. Sam's delicious anger. Apparently some people thought it was inappropriate for Sam to be so mad at Dean last week. At least that's what I read on the Tumblr. I'm sure no one reading this post feels that way. I mean, anyone who found Sam's anger inappropriate would have stopped reading my crap a long time ago, right? I just don't get it. This isn't an "I can see both sides" situation. Dean withheld information from Sam - lied to Sam - and I know they've both lied to each other before, but this was something catastrophic involving someone he loves. And when confronted, Dean doubled down. He didn't say "sorry, I just couldn't bear to tell you" or "I was hoping Cas would find some other way" or "I was trying to think of a way to break it to you easy." He blamed Sam. He told Sam he wasn't qualified to have that information because he would have done something about it. And after Dean spent the entire episode whining about having no control over his life, being a hamster in a wheel, he sentenced Sam to the same fate - he told him that he didn't have the right to know about Jack because he refused to just accept that this is their destiny.

I mean, I'm not bitter or anything.

Silver lining: Dean treating Sam so horribly at least means I got some tasty, tasty Angry Sam. (Mandatory disclaimer: I love Dean. I love that he is heroic and self-sacrificing but also deeply, deeply flawed.) Moving on.

Wait. I also love that Sam's justification for the silent treatment isn't I'm punishing you or even I'm mad at you, but is literally there is nothing I can say to you. Nothing I say will mean anything to you. All right, now we're moving on. Searching for the source of the noise, the guys find - Amara! Drinking their beer! Wearing pink again, but this time it's sparkly! "We should talk," she says.

Or, you know, we could just look. Looking is good. We have a little time jump in order to gather Jack. Amara tells the boys that her brother is back, and Jack knows this means it's time. She asks how they're going to cage Chuck, and Dean lies that Jack will be able to do it. Amara hopes she and Jack can get to know each other afterward, and Jack lies that they will. He just has to complete one final ritual. Sam doesn't lie to anybody; he just stands there looking unhappy. Amara asks what she can do to help, and they cut away from any discussion of what she's going to do, but then we get this. When the time comes, we can count on you, right? Like I told you when we first met, you and I will always help each other. Awkward! The way Amara is looking at Dean, I'm pretty sure she knows he's lying, and is just waiting for him to break down. (Spoiler alert: why do I even try?) But Dean and his lying, lying eyes do not break down.

But those eyes don't exactly hide any secrets either, do they? Meanwhile, Jack is concerned that Sam is angry at him. Or disappointed. Sam manages to express both support for Jack doing the thing and a strong desire for Jack to not do the thing. "Sacrificing your life for a cause takes a lot of courage," he says."I still think it's wrong, though." OH SAM. YOU WOULD KNOW. AND YOU WOULD DO IT ANYWAY. Apparently Jack's final ritual is taking place in Santa Fe. Dean's ready to go, and says they can be there by morning. (Oh, I hope she tells us if that's possible, they said sarcastically.) Hey, anyone who doesn't want a deep dive into the logistics of Winchester travel can write their own damn recap skip this part. I think the guys actually went to Santa Fe last season? Ouroboros? Anyway, it's 10.5 hours away. 11 hours if you avoid highways, which we know Dean likes to do, although that route would take you on some mountain roads that would probably be a little much for the Impala. So yeah, depending on what time it is now, "by morning" is doable. I know you're relieved. I think the bigger question is when will Cas get back from Mexico City? (Yes, I'm sure he drove - he was standing by his blue truck. Yes, I know no one else cares.) Dean is surprised to find that Sam's not going. He accuses Sam of "taking a knee," but Sam says that's not what he's doing. He's still looking for another way. Sam, you and me, we have to do this; it's in the book. Oh, Chuck's death book, right? Come on, man! Blindly following orders, sending Amara to her death; does any of this feel right to you? It doesn't matter how we feel! You know what? Stay. Stay. But somebody's got to be the grownup here. Yeah, well, someone has to keep fighting for Jack. He knows what he signed up for! Last I checked, we don't give up on family. Jack's not family! I know how you feel about the kid, okay? I feel for him too. I do. But he's not like you. He's not like Cas. He's just not. I have to confess, I maaaayyyybeee haven't been keeping up with the A plot as much as I should have, because I wasn't aware they were actually operating from a book. (Or I was and I forgot. Stranger things have happened.) I thought this was just Billie's plan. But if it's a book, that means it was fated to happen, right? Um, like the Ma'lak box? And why isn't Sam pointing that out? Why isn't Sam saying "we've already changed one of Billie's unchangeable endings, what makes you think we can't change this one?" But, you know. That's not important. What is important are two things: 1, the way Sam reacts when Dean says "Jack's not family," and B, the fact that Jack has entered the room at some point and heard some of that. Again, awkward! How many times has Jack come up behind someone and overheard something like that? Why don't they put a bell on that poor kid? Jack says he's ready, Sam gives him a sad, broken little smile and Jack and Dean hit the road. Boy, that's gonna be an uncomfortable 11 hours.

Whatever you think about this scene, you have to admit Jared is acting the hell out of it. Bunker. Cas is back, so I guess it's been 35 hours since that phone call. "Stayed behind to find another way, huh? I would have done the same." They research together. Wooded park. Amara. Chuck shows up. A title card weirdly informs us this is Amara. Yeah, we know that. I don't really care that much about their convo. All you need to know is he wants to do a "hard reset" - another Big Bang? - and can't do it without her. But she cares about this world now and wants to protect it. He thinks humans are lame and boring, and she says "what about your first children?" and zaps him into Heaven. He's welcomed by a small, adoring group of angels, but Crystal (an angel named Crystal?) annoys him so much that he snaps them all away. Amara offers him balance, darkness and light, here on this Earth, but he's not interested. So she zaps him into the bunker, which she has made into a trap for him. Impala. Dean, says the title card, unnecessarily. (Now that I've figured out what they're doing, I'd say the odds are 50:50 that Sam will have a title card.) Dean starts to talk about what Jack heard - not necessarily to apologize, but Jack says he understands that he's not like Sam or Cas. Okay then. Morning. They show up at a jewelry store and are greeted enthusiastically by the man and woman inside. "I'm Adam," the man says. "You know. God's primo. First dude off the assembly line." The woman with him is not Eve, but a hippie angel named Seraphina. I guess that means she's a seraph? Get it? (Sorry, I have to amuse myself sometimes.) She proclaims Jack's aura is "like Skittles," and of course it is. What else would it be like, other than something sweet and rainbow-colored? {Sidebar: Or should it be like nougat? Discuss.} Adam and Seraphina are very into Jack and also very much into each other. They separate long enough for Adam to take Jack for a "pop quiz." Seraphina says she knows Jack will pass because she saw it in a dream, which annoys me because angels don't sleep, but it turns out she means a mushroom-induced hallucination. She tells Dean that so many things had to happen for Jack to end up here, it was obviously "meant to be." Which doesn't sit well with Dean. Meanwhile, Adam explains to Jack that because of what God did to him and his sons, he's been wanting to kill him for a very long time. Billie is working with him, and kept him alive so he could finish the job. They've just been waiting for Jack. Adam shows him a tray of crystals and tells him to pick the one that was touched by God. Jack points to one, and Adam is disappointed. That's your choice? Yes. And... the others. All of them. They're just rocks, but their existence makes them divine, because God is in everything. And that's the right answer! Jack and Adam return, triumphant, and Seraphina celebrates by plunging a knife into Adam's chest and prying out a rib. Ew. "Everything can contain the spark of the divine, but this puppy? Is packing enough punch to create life. Or in this case, destroy God." With the power of the rib, Jack will turn into a "metaphysical black hole for divine energy" that nothing can escape. Not Amara, not God. But once is starts, it can't be stopped, so Jack shouldn't use it until "game time."

I'm pleased that Adam is a Middle Eastern guy. Back in the Impala, some hours later, Dean pulls over right before they get home. He apologizes to Jack for hearing what he heard. Not for saying it, but for Jack hearing it. He tells Jack that he hasn't been free his entire life. "But now, now me and Sam, we got a shot at living a life. Without all this crap on our backs. And that's because of you. So, I want to say, I need to say, thank you, Jack." Well, that's a nice emotional moment, but isn't Jack doing this to save the world? Not just to get Dean off the hamster wheel? Dean's phone buzzes. It's time. Jack takes the rib out of its baggie and absorbs it into his hand and oh, Jack, I don't think I'd have done that just yet. Bunker. Is this Sam's section? Yes, it is! \o/ Sam hurls a book to the floor in frustration and is comforted by Cas. Guys, Sam and Cas tend to do some crazy fucked-up shit when they're left together unsupervised, and I am here for it. Sam wishes he could talk to Billie about her plan, and Cas immediately assumes he's going to kill himself and puts his foot down. But Sam suddenly remembers what Sergei said about the key to Death's library. "Oh, is that why I invited Sergei here to the secret bunker," Cas says, "because now that makes sense." They start digging through old wooden chests and I'm fairly sure these are boxes full of cursed objects, although all they find are a large novelty chess piece, a gold leaf cross from Hobby Lobby, and the Holy Grail.

Tell me you didn't think the same thing. But Cas eventually does find the box with the key. The box has an inscription in Latin, which Sam reads out loud. By the way, Sam Latinating is always hot, even though he looks like he doesn't understand what he's saying. As the guys watch in amazement, a portal and keyhole appear in the wall. Cas wants to go with, but Sam asks him to stay and buy him some time if Dean comes back before he gets out, even if that sounds crazy. "Sam, for what it's worth, I don't think you're crazy," Cas says. "I think your internal compass is functioning perfectly." And Sam's all, aw, that's the nicest thing anyone's said to me in a long time.

"Donde está la biblioteca?” He puts the key in the keyhole and opens the door into the W section of Billie's library. I want him to start pulling books off the shelves and reading versions of his death, but he's distracted by a dead reaper on the floor. And more dead reapers. And the sound of one begging for her life and then noisily dying. He finally sees Empty!Meg (\o/) sitting at the circulation desk, as another reaper pleads for his life. "Please," he cries, "she won't come!" He prays unsuccessfully for Billie to come, and gets his neck snapped for his trouble. Sam immediately tries to nope the hell out of there, but Empty!Meg snaps her fingers and he appears in front of her. Sam Winchester? Meg? Sorry, she's still dead. Just borrowing the queen's pretty face cause really? I'm empty. {Sidebar: Why would Meg's meatsuit go to the Empty with her? Discuss.} Empty!Meg is trying to get Billie's attention, and she drops a bombshell on Sam. Billie intends to become the new God. "Classic narcissist, right? So tingly for the rules, the good old days. Everyone back to where they belong. Realities, dimensions, graves. What should be dead dies, angels off Earth, demons back to Hell, and I go back to sleep!" Oh, wait. Graves? So anyone who was dead at some point, and was brought back to life, would go back to the grave? She tells Sam that he's in God's book - the ornate book in front of her that only Billie can read. "She always talked about how you should be so dead, except she needs you." Empty!Meg decides that hurting Sam might get Billie's attention, and well, y'all know I'm not opposed to that. (If you're new here, hi, my name is caranfindel and I have a problem.) She brings Sam to his knees, but he finally manages to say "Billie sent me." Oh, Sam. He claims Billie sent him to get the book, because she's trapped on Earth. Empty!Meg can't go to Earth unless she's summoned (hmmm, wonder if that will come up later), and Sam says he has a message for her, from Billie. "Billie will honor her promise. God, Amara, they die. And you, you can go back to sleep." Empty!Meg decides to believe Sam, even though he didn't even know who she was or why she was there when he got there, or that Billie had even made any promises, but I'd have a hard time saying no to that face too.

I'll believe your lies. When Sam comes back through the door into the bunker, Cas greets him with "finally" as if he's been gone a long time, so time must flow differently in Billie's library. Cas tells him Chuck and Amara are here, and it's time. "We can't let that happen," says Sam. "We have to stop it." In the trap, Chuck narrates what's happening elsewhere in the bunker. "You hear that? Dean. Brought to the edge of doubt. His sense of duty, his rage, winning out in the end." As Dean drags Jack through the hall, Sam tells him about Billie's plan to take advantage of the power vacuum and become God. Dean doesn't care - he doesn't mind being duped as long as it's not by Chuck. "And poor Sam," says Chuck. "Always gotta know everything. Can't leave well enough alone." Poor Sam stands in front of Dean, trying to stop him. Dean yells that Jack already "lit the fuse" and they can't wait any longer. "This is my ending," Chuck says. "My real ending." And just as I'm wondering if he means his preferred ending, where one brother always kills another, Dean pulls his gun out and points it at Sam's heart. "Move, Sam. Move!" Sam's horrified. Cas and Jack are horrified. I'm horrified. And also, I'm ashamed to say, very entertained. I mean, I don't want the brothers fighting, and yet for Dean to lose the plot so badly that he'd actually shoot Sam in order to get off the hamster wheel? That's some gloriously messed up stuff, friends. Amara is shocked that Chuck orchestrated all of this. "What part of omniscient do you people not understand?" he says, and YES. THIS is something that has long needed to be said. He says that even though he can't read his death book, all he had to do was plant a few visions, mess with a few outcomes, bada bing bada boom! Nobody's killing him! Hallway. Sam pleads with Dean. "I don't want to do this," Dean says, "but this is everything!"

THIS is everything. Trap. Amara tells Chuck they're going to cage him, not kill him. Hallway. Dean does that thing you do with a gun when you want someone to know you're serious. Clicks off the safety, or whatever. Sam makes a have we really come to this? face and yanks Dean's gun hand away. Dean punches him and he drops to the floor. Trap. Chuck tells Amara that TFW is planning to kill both of them. Hallway. Dean drags Jack toward the trap and Sam tackles him. Dean punches him again. Cas just watches all this. What the hell, Cas. Trap. Chuck says the Winchesters are using Jack to destroy them. Amara says that can't be, because Dean can't hurt her. "No, but he can lie to you. He can send you into the meat grinder with a wink and a smile." But isn't that hurting her? Hallway. Dean orders Cas and Jack to go. Sam yells for Jack not to do it. Cas asks why not, because... Cas has suddenly forgotten what side of this argument he's on? "Because if Billie takes over, then everyone goes back to where they belong!" Sam says. "That means everybody from Apocalypse World - Bobby, Charlie - they get sent back to a place that doesn't exist any more. And everyone we saved! Eileen, she just dies, again! And that's just the beginning!" Trap. Amara is devastated. Hallway. Dean yells that they don't have a choice, and Sam says "we always have a choice!" Trap. Chuck tells Amara "the only ones who ever really get us is us." Hallway. Dean says there's nothing they can do but get out of the way, and he doesn't care if Billie becomes God. I'd trade it all, I'd trade 'em all, for Chuck! In a heartbeat! What about me? Would you trade me? Okay, is this Sam pointing out that if Billie becomes God, he dies? Because it's awfully subtle, and I think he just needs to come right and say "that's fine, Dean, but when I told you everyone we saved would die again, I meant everyone, and that includes me!" And Dean would probably also want to know that angels will be banished to Heaven, don't you think, Sam? Anyway. I saw this on Tumblr, and I can't get to it now because Tumblr is being a little bitch, but basically: Sam Winchester may have low self-worth, but he absolutely knows what he means to his brother, and he does not hesitate to use it. Trap. Chuck offers Amara the balance she said she wanted. "Us, starting fresh, creating something new, something beautiful, peaceful, together. And we can finally forget about all this pain. No baggage. Only balance." He extends a hand. Amara takes it and dissolves into smoke, which is absorbed by Chuck, who now has one demon-black eye and one angel-blue eye. And a sadistic grin. Hallway. Chuck has to die. He has to! Otherwise he'll keep us tap dancing forever, and I can't live like that, man! I can't live like that; I won't! I know you feel like that right now, okay? I know you do. But you gotta trust me. My entire life, you've protected me. From Dad? From Lucifer? From everything. I didn't always like it, you know, but it's the one thing in the whole world that I could always count on. It's the only thing I've ever known that was true. So please, put the gun away. Just put it away. We'll figure it out, Dean; we'll find another way. You and me. We always do. Gotta admit, I'm torn about this scene. I mean, on the one hand, it's beautifully done, so much emotion and angst and anger and teary-eyed, shaky Sam. Once again, Jared is acting the hell out of it. (And Jensen too, but come on.) And yet, on the other hand... how bad is Sam's Stockholm Syndrome? "You protected me from Dad?" Have we seen any evidence of that? I'm sure Dean was forced to be the referee sometimes, but have we seen any evidence that Dean ever said "no Sam, you're not disowned just because you want to stop hunting and go to college" or "no Dad, I'm not even going to pretend I'll kill Sam," rather than consider it an option until he was actually faced with it? It seems like "protecting Sam from Dad" mostly meant "trying to get Sam to do what Dad wanted, so he'd stay out of trouble." And Lucifer? When Sam told him he was Lucifer's vessel, and the Devil was coming to him in his dreams, Dean basically said "sucks to be you, now pick a hemisphere." Now, I'm aware that Dean has actually protected Sam from many, many things. In good ways and in bad ways. And yet he's also hurt him in some pretty awful ways. I mean, he just now threatened to shoot him for refusing to accept his destiny is to help Dean escape the slavery of his destiny. So for Sam to say "you protect me" is one thing. Dean absolutely does that. But to say it's the only thing that's true, and to specifically mention John and Lucifer, well. Hmmm.

Let's just concentrate on the pretty. Anyway. Dean puts the gun away, Sam sighs a tearful shaky sigh of relief, and then the door to Amara's trapped room explodes. Chuck walks out dramatically - not nearly as hot as Demon!Demon dramatically walking through his own destroyed door - and yells at them. "Are you kidding me? After everything, after all that, you did it again!" He tells them he absorbed Amara, mocks Castiel (which is kind of funny), and says they're all stupid, stubborn, and broken, and he's done with them. "You know what you do with broken toys? You throw them out. So, kill each other, don't kill each other, I don't care." Then he tells them to have fun watching Jack die, and zaps on out of there. Jack collapses, and bad things are clearly happening to him. Well, it's hard to get worked up over Jack dying again (what would this be, the third time?). After all, as Dean said, he's not Sam. I'm more interested in finding out if Dean understood he was sentencing Sam to death when he said he didn't care if Billie became God. {Sidebar: Would Dean die too? Or would everything that happened because Sam was brought back be erased? Discuss. And maybe fic.} And now Amara is gone. But, conveniently, destroying Chuck will also destroy her, so. Balance! Unity! Hugs and puppies all around! Oh, friends. The end is near, and I don't feel good about it. I'm anxious about a lot of things happening next week, and the third-to-last episode of Supernatural is one of them. How do you feel? 

Please help me stay unspoiled, including episode titles and casting info, thanks!

[lostsoulaltair]

Owari no Seraph. Special Analsys for Hiragi Mahiru - Part II

Yesterday I started updating again, likewise, I posted an analysis of Mahiru’s actions related towards chapter 97 but, likewise, people have different opinions and that’s alright, but well, I’d like to reply to the post of a person that was kind enough to give its respective opinion; as for that, I do have answers for the actions Mahiru did in the past; therefore, let’s begin!

Before starting to reply said post which is something I’ve seen with other people that share the same ideas, let’s first recall what was Mahiru’s vision back in the LNs along the criteria that is often thought about Mahiru:

Mahiru manipulated Guren  (Wrong)

First of all, Mahiru and Guren didn’t meet as a random thing; their meeting was elaborated by Rigr Stafford; at that time, Mahiru and Guren were 5 years old; back in the day, Mahiru’s mother was murdered by Tenri’s orders; which made Mahiru leave the Hiragi household; what she wouldn’t expect was to meet a young boy around her age.

(This is taken from Catastrophe LNs and World Resurrection LNs)

The young girl didn’t reveal information about her since she wanted for once be a normal girl, she called herself a fairy of the forest; of course Guren didn’t believe such thing but nevertheless, both enjoyed each other company; said happiness wouldn’t last forever, since the Hiragi Family found Mahiru and of course, that leads us to the scene on which Guren is beated

According to the Official LNs of the World Resurrection at 19; Rigr planned those two to meet each other; he wanted to keep removing the power within the Hiragi household but what he didn’t expect was that Guren Ichinose and Mahiru Hiragi would fall in love with each other.

After Mahiru was taken back, Guren kept on with his training which is something Mahiru did as well until the promised day came, they met back back when they were in highschool.

Back in the LN Vol 3, Mahiru made a phone call for Guren, on which she begged him to kill her; Guren of course, having the same feelings towards hers wants to know why Mahiru is doing all of the activities she did back in the Catastrophe; Guren eventually reaches a building; said building had a diary. Such diary was Mahiru’s diary.

Such diary had information about her and Shinoa such as the events we saw in the latest chapter whcih focused on the Hiragi sisters; Guren learnt that Mahiru and Shinoa were born as guinea pigs, they were the only ones that remained alive and healthy, eventually said experiment was stopped due to the cost it carried.

Though, new experiments started and this is due to the fact, Mahiru one day had a dream, a dark dream; she was in an endless darkness and was constantly interrogated by an Oni or a Demon. Said dream was shared with Shinoa; which is exactly the events of chapter 97; Mahiru warned Shinoa to not tell anyone about it, and of course, in order to make Shinoa endure all the torture methods they could do, Mahiru managed to erase Shinoa’s memories in order to make her a person without emotions.

Due to this, Shinoa ended up forgetting many things, and eventually Mahiru ended up removing Shinoa’s demon and took it within her; which is also stated in the diary she left for Guren back when she had more control over herself.

Mahiru’s contradiction (wrong)

Another point a user along and friend of mine that has been doubtful  pointed out, was that why Mahiru cared if in chapter 57 Mahiru was encouraging Shinoa to open up her heart a bit more so she could see her again:

(Image taken from Official Translation of chapter 56)

Back then, Mahiru didn’t know what monster was exactly possessing her sister, Mahiru believed Shinoa could take down her demon after so many years passed, after the experiments no longer existed, but, now, you might wonder how she wasn’t able to recognize how dangerous was Shinoa’s demon if she took it within her.

For this, there’s an explanation; Shikama Doji is capable of only displaying himself as a scythe, in the catastrophe, he was tied to Tenri Hiragi, he wasn’t tied to a contract until the cursed gears existed; Mahiru used Shikama Doji when she went to meet up the Queen and eventually made Guren to return it to Shinoa; but, the sole issue is, that Shikama is known for being a liar along being someone who’s able to have control over its own manifestation as seen in chapter 72

(Image taken from Official Translation of chapter 72)

Within that arc, Guren and Mahiru were aware a monster was roaming free, a monster trying to possess the Hiragi Family, but here comes the issue, they believed that whoever controlled fate and the Hiragi Family, was a monster that came directly from Tenri, instead of having suspiciousness of being the same monster residing within Shinoa:

(Image taken from Official Translation of chapter 72)

Within those moments, Shinoa was ambiguous and didn’t reveal whenever the monster was the same as the one possessing Tenri or Kureto, but rather, gave an idea that she was fending against that thing for so long, when in reality, the monster has been the one she was born to; and that revelation occured when Yu was in danger

(Image taken from Official Translation of chapter 74)

At that very moment, Guren realized who they were fighting, and, by obvious reasons, Mahiru as well, which that’d explain that Mahiru didn’t know Shikama Doji’s real appearance but then again, how can I state that?

That’s very simple:

(Image taken from Official Translation of chapter 71)

Mahiru found out thanks to being a demon, who was the monster that always tried to prey within them, but well, things went south with Shinoa, she got possessed but eventually was saved.

Mahiru murdered Guren’s friends out of anger (Wrong)

It is believe that Mahiru enjoyed the chase of the cat and the mouse with Guren and his squad along Kureto, this is wrong; she was delaying everything; back in the Catastrophe, she was keeping two demons within her, which were corrupting her and taking away her humanity faster; she couldn’t withstand the intensity of having two demons within her since she could hear the voices from them; but, at the same time, she remembered what was she fighting for; she was often seen as a person with hurry but in fact, she was desperately trying to make or set things in order to keep her two loved persons alive, them being Guren and Shinoa.

After she became a vampire, the contract with Shikama Doji and Asuramaru was broken, her heart was no longer human, and the cursed gears were like poison to her and the final race was beginning.

While I understand why people get angry about her for killing Guren’s squad, there’s a reason for that.

Have you forgotten that Tenri Hiragi was alive at those moments?

If Mahiru didn’t kill Guren’s friends, they wouldn’t have been saved in any possible way, how can I state that?

Tenri’s goal was to follow up the orders of the First Progenitor; and he’d always neutralize whoever was a nusiance or in this case, he’d have gotten rid of the people who didn’t serve any longer; Mahiru would have been dead still but in the case Guren’s friends didn’t die, Tenri would have personally killed them without mercy, and thus, Guren wouldn’t have been able to even bring them back.

You might ask or wonder how I can state such things and this is due to the fact, that in the Final Volume of the Catastrophe, Kureto had a conversation with Tenri Hiragi; Kureto learnt that Tenri was behind everything along the fact that he used Shinoa as a hostage so Mahiru couldn’t refuse or do the opposite of what she wished to do; so Mahiru did her best to fool Tenri along the Hyakuya Sect without having Shinoa getting killed.

Within this, it doesn’t mean her actions are well seen, nor it’s something that readers enjoy, myself included, but, if she didn’t do such things, there wouldn’t be even a story in the first place; if Mahiru didn’t protect Shinoa, Shinoa would either have been dead or would have been submitted to worser experiments until they were able to trigger her demon within the process.

The experiments of the Hyakuya Sect and Mahiru were part of a deal; the Hyakuya Sect which was under Rigr Stafford’s care had its own goals, Mahiru only aimed to use Rigr’s personal ambition and goal to actually use it in benefit for humanity in order to make humanity get rid of the curse.

Along this, it is to state that she never enjoyed children experimentation; back when she visited Yu, she was angry by the fact on how he was experimented upon; which is why, when she saw him, she told him he had the right to live along finding a reason to live.

For now, this will be the second part of her character analysis. Mahiru is a complex character that hides too well her emotions but in reality, Mahiru was afraid, she had to face the world alone, she was gifted but instead of being like Tenri, she aimed to break the ties she had with them, she tried to bring some sort of salvation to new generations to come along the fact she entrusted many things to Guren.

Guren’s decision to stand next to her or follow her wasn’t due to manipulation or the sorts, Mahiru was dwelling between demon and her own persona. Within this, a decision was eventually taken, Guren wanted to learn and be next to her and fight with her.

Guren might be seen as an evil character but he’s an anti-hero, he’s doing what it’s possible to bring back what was lost, to actually defeat and get over the curse the First settled within the world. And for that, even if it was inmoral, he required the help of the boys that were experimented upon long ago.

Therefore, I can only say that, despite being portrayed as an evil character, Mahiru did many inmoral things in order to give at least hope to humanity to fight back agains the cruel destiny that was settled in by the First.

[imherongraystairstrash]

Christopher and Gabriel Lightwood

Hey guys! Someone requested I do Christopher and Gabriel, so here it is. I apologize in advance for this length, I didn’t set out for it to be this long... I guess that’s all. Also, I haven’t finished gotten my copy of Chog yet, so it might not be so accurate. Up next: Anna and Christopher (I’m glad you guys love the Lightwood Herondales and much as I do) -Ana

Benedict Lightwood was staring at Gabriel. His eyebrows were furrowed and although Gabriel was taller than he was, Benedict seemed to loom over him. His figure was frightening.

“You have disappointed me, Gabriel.”

Gabriel felt himself shrink into nothingness, meanwhile his father grew and grew and morphed into a worm. Cecily came with her seraph blade. She exchanged blow after blow with Benedict until she lost her footing, and Benedict ripped her into shreds before Gabriel’s eyes. He cried out in pain, for he had lost his strong and beautiful wife. Anna had stepped up, trying to save Cecily, only to have Benedict swat his tail and throw her against a tree, where her lifeless body slumped in the grass. Alex called out to his father, his screaming drowned out by Benedict’s attack. Gabriel was powerless to stop any of it.

“Father, are you alright?” His son’s lavender eyes looked down on him.

“Kit.” He breathed.

Before Kit could answer, a blade pierced his chest, and he fell down to his knees, gasping for air.

Gabriel woke in a cold sweat. He blinked his eyes over and over, trying to stop the gruesome images from replaying in his mind. He looked at Cecily, who had edged closer to him. Cecily was a light sleeper, and he must have woken her up during his nightmare. He planted a kiss on her head and sat up.

“Where are you off to?” Cecily said, her words slurred from sleep.

Gabriel leaned down and planted little kisses on her face.

“I will be right back.” He whispered

“You better.”

Gabriel chuckled and softly kissed Cecy one more time before getting up.

The cold floor sent a shock through him. He walked down the hallways of the London house. Although he knew it was superstitious on his part, he felt an obligation to check on his children, and make sure nothing had happened to them. The first room was Alexander’s. They had made sure to keep him in close proximity, so if he had a nightmare, the trip to their room would not be so far. However, Alex rarely suffered from nightmares. Ironically, it was Gabriel and occasionally Cecily who had the most trouble when it came to sleep. Gabriel had assumed that over the years, the pain and horrors of the past would subside, but that never happened.

He looked into Anna’s room and found his daughter sound asleep. He smiled to himself. How could he have been blessed with such wonderful children? Anna was everything Gabriel had not been in the past. Anna would not have stayed with Benedict as Gabriel had, even after Gideon had begged him to come to the London institute. Anna would not have been afraid as he was.

Gabriel walked down the hall to Kit’s room. The door was closed, but light danced under it. He opened the door to find Kit wide awake, writing something down with crazed determination. Cecily had always said that that expression always reminded her of Gabriel.

The thought of Cecily reminded him of a conversation he had had with her a fortnight ago:

“I love Christopher to death.”

“But?”

“But I wish I could understand him better. I want to understand how he sees the world, how he picks apart and analyzes situations.”

“That seems quite difficult.”

“It is. Especially considering how intelligent he is.”

“That’s our Kit.” Said Cecily with immense pride, “I fear he is more intelligent than I could ever hope to be.”

Gabriel smiled. There was a time when Christopher’s habits of experimenting had frustrated them both. More than anything, they scared them. Very time Gabriel would catch his son with an open flame, or strong chemicals, he couldn’t seem to breathe properly. It took him a while to accept that his little boy, who would throw his arms up to be picked up and rest his small head on Gabriel’s shoulder, was grown. He still remembers when Kit was newly born, and his Uncle Will offered his finger for him to hold. Kit just stared at it in wonder, as though not sure what to do with it.

“He’s going to change the world, this one.” Charlotte had said.

“What makes you say that.” Cecily laughed

“Instead of simply grabbing it, he’s thinking of the best way to approach the situation. That differs him from most children, but definitely not in a bad way.”

...

“You do know, Mr. Lightwood,” the Inquisitor had told Gabriel once, “Basilias is a fine institution for, erm, special Shadowhunters.”

“I am aware.” said Gabriel, not knowing what the Inquisitor was implying he do with this information.

“An you do know, of course, that taking your son there does not make you or Mrs. Lightwood bad parents. The opposite really, you would be doing your son a favor.”

Gabriel widened his eyes in disbelief.

“It will provide you and your wife some much deserved peace.”

Cecily stopped the conversation she was having with the inquisitor’s wife. Gabriel gave the inquisitor a hard stare before saying, loud enough for the entire room to hear:

“My son is not a burden to myself or my family, nor do Mrs. Lightwood and I need “a break” from him. I am horrified you would think my wife and I would be so quick to rid ourselves of him.”

There were many more things he would like to tell the Inquisitor, but he had to stop himself for the sake of his family. To have an enemy with that much power could ruin their lives, despite being close to the Consul herself. Instead, Gabriel turned away from him, grabbed his coat and let him out. He had only walked three step into the snowy pathway before the door opened again and Cecily came rushing out to catch up with him. Every two steps Cecily took was equivalent to one of Gabriel’s, and she tripped on her feet. Gabriel caught her before she could fall on the ground. She looked up at him, smiling.

“The inquisitor’s expression when you left was priceless. He turned as red as a tomato!”

Gabriel looked at her.

Cecy’s smile faded. “What’s wrong, love?”

“I just cannot believe the nerve of him.”

Cecily sighed and held her gloved hand to his face. Her impossibly dark blue eyes looked into his own.

“The world is going to be cruel to our Kit and it will be our job as his parents to support and protect him until he is able to protect himself.”

“I just cannot comprehend why they think him crazed.”

“Because Shadowhunters are afraid of anyone that is different. That is why they shun Tessa and why the academy tried to get rid of Jamie. That’s why they though Henry foolish.”

That was the day that Gabriel realized that it was not open flames he had to protect his son from, but his own kind.

Gabriel opened Kit’s door just a crack and found his son bent over, writing something with intensity. Gabriel crossed the room and stood beside Kit. Then, he thought about how terrifying it must be to be writing something and not know your father is beside you. Benedict had done that so many times, it started to feel like he would do it in purpose, just to make sure Gabriel was still afraid of him. Gabriel quietly took some steps back, and walked back to his side, this time with more noise.

“Kit?”

Christopher looked up at Gabriel, half of his right eye was the color of lavender in the candlelight while left eye a very dark shade of blue.

Christopher was born with his eyes open, observing the world for the day he was born. Gabriel and Cecily were sure the magnificent color would change over time; lighten to match the color of Cecily and Will’s. Sophie had argued otherwise, but everybody else seemed to agree that the color would fade overtime. Gabriel remembered holding Kit and looking down at his son and feeling a rush of emotion, similar to when he held Anna for the first time. He thought about his father.

“I will protect you with my all heart,” he’d said “and I will never abandon you the way my father hurt me.”

Kit looked at his father with fascination as Gabriel began to cry. Gabriel supported his newly born son’s head, his fingers tangling in his small, brown curls, and kissed his forehead.

“Kit, why are you awake?”

“I am writing down an idea I had.”

“Can it not wait for tomorrow?”

Kit looked at him, completely baffled. Then he whispered:

“You can tell your thoughts to come back tomorrow?” His eyes danced. “Could you teach me how?”

“Oh, no Kit, I just meant writing this down tomorrow rather then at three in the morning.”

Christopher ran a hand through his hair.

“Blimey, is it already three in the morning?”

Gabriel smiled. “Yes, and that means it is time to go to bed.”

“Okay.”

“And sleep.”

Kit was silent.

“Father?”

“Yes?”

“It might take a while for me to fall asleep. I am not very good at it.”

“Neither am I, Kit.”

Christopher looked at him. “Do you suppose I inherited an allele for insomnia from you?”

Gabriel blinked, not knowing what his son just asked him.

“I don’t know.”

Christopher looked a little disappointed.

“Do not worry, Papa, I shall find out.” He set off to work.

“Tomorrow, Kit.” Gabriel said as he led his son to his bed. “Promise me you will wait until tomorrow.”

“I promise.”

Gabriel smiled. “Alright then.”

“Papa?”

Gabriel turned around.

“I wish you fast sleep.”

“And I to you Kit.” Gabriel blew out the candle, and when back to bed.

“Took you long enough.” Cecily whispered.

Gabriel planted a kiss on her head and drew her into his arms and then slept sweet dreams of his family, together and happy.

[let-me-write]

The Truth Untold

Find chapters 1 2 3 here

Chapter 4:  Blindsided

Drusilla Blackthorn looked forward to finally be a part of a mission but that came second only to meeting her brother again. What awaits her at the New York Institute?

The black car rolled determinedly through the Manhattan traffic, making lethargic progress, in an endless sea of cabs.

Though it has been two years since Dru had joined the academy, she has been to the New York Institute only once before. She was excited about the mission obviously but not as much as for seeing her brother again.

She and her brother Ty had gotten closer since the unfortunate events at Idris. She would be meeting him after a long time; what with their breaks never aligning.

Beside her, Thais was immersed in her book, occasionally glancing up to notice their progress on road.

Louis, on the wheel, was trying his best not to hit the cab in front of him, despite its erratic manoeuvres. He must be regretting this new American experience, Dru thought.

Of course, this miserable journey of theirs could have been avoided, if they had come through a portal. Well, hard luck for them, since portals were being regulated and they stayed within the state, unlike the centurions.

It was fifteen more minutes before they reached the gothic cathedral, which was the New York Institute. She had loved it on her first visit. Now, she observed it admiringly, captivated by the building's mystic charm.

Thais joined her behind the car, to collect all their belongings. Louis offered to carry their weapons trunk. They didn't refuse as he could get pushy, in an awkwardly polite way. It's best to let him carry on his "gentlemanly duties".

Dru followed her friend through the entrance. Thais whistled, amazed, now that they were closer.

"This place seems right up our alley, doesn't it Dru bear ?"

Dru scoffed at the new nickname. She could count on Thais to be ridiculous, irrespective of the place.

She replied to the other girl, "Oh, we're definitely watching that slasher film here. There's no other perfect setting". Dru was glad at the moment that she had a friend, who appreciated her morbid interests.

As soon as they pushed the door open to the institute, they were greeted with the sight of four shadowhunters - all in gear and immersed in a serious discussion.

Isabelle noticed them first and greeted them with a smile. She placed her hand on Simon's arm to stop him from speaking further.

Of course, the adults didn't want to traumatize them, she thought sourly.

Meanwhile, Jace and Clary rushed towards them in a coordinated manner. Clary pulled her into a hug which she returned awkwardly.

Thais Pedroso, to her right, was comparing her biceps with Jace, who was equally indulgent.

This wasn't new for them both...well, Jace had been to the academy for guest lectures before, and Thais-for reasons unknown-had declared her intention to best him in muscle building, of all things.

Dru shook her head. She must give up analyzing her friend's actions, gradually.

Soon, Isabelle and Simon joined them. Simon inquired about Beatriz and Catarina, and sincerely empathized with their travails at the academy.

After a few minutes of these formalities, Dru and Thais were shown to their room. It was a huge room with two beds in opposite corners. The two girls settled in and wondered if Louis made it into the institute.

Louis Rayhorn was from the Brussels institute. He had an easygoing and helpful attitude which should have technically made him popular...but sadly, he was also nosy and emitted an uneasy aura.

He was an able shadowhunter but an okayish companion. They were one of the only ones, who didn't mind his company. Because, Louis, for all his eccentricities, was their well-intentioned friend.

Thais worried now, " What if he got into trouble or worse, lost?"

Dru frowned, " I don't think Clary and Jace would abandon him. They knew he was coming too."

The other girl continued as if Dru hadn't spoken, " Let's go explore the institute. Find the weapons room. Maybe we'll find him there"

Dru nodded. She was still in the process of figuring out her signature weapon. Maybe, a look at the extensive collections of the New York Institute would help.

They roamed two floors aimlessly before stumbling upon a metal door with seraph blades carved on it.

" Very subtle" observed Thais. She pulled the handle and let herself in. Dru followed.

At once she stepped in, she heard her friend exclaim " Oh there he is!! I'm glad you made it here intact!! "

Dru followed Thais' gaze to the back of the room.

In front of a huge wooden trunk stood two figures; Louis was facing them and beside him, she saw a blond head diving into the trunk.

Must be Jace, she thought, but then realized that there was something odd about his physique.

Louis interjected her thoughts with his " Oh hey girls!! I was about to ask Christopher here to show me to my room. If not for him, I would have been wandering cluelessly"

Dru was perplexed, Wait, Christopher!?

Just then, the blond boy pulled himself upright and turned towards them.

Dru gasped...her mind was reeling.

The boy in front of her was taller, muscular, and held himself in an unmistakable Shadowhunter gait.

But his eyes; they gave it away...he was Kit...Kit Herondale was standing before her, older but still the same.

Kit Herondale looked equally unnerved as her, his blue eyes widening in surprise. 'Dru ' he mouthed.

Dru wasn't going to let him continue. She stormed towards him.

" What are you doing here?" she asked not too politely.

Kit's face was imperceptible. He seemed to be mulling over this question. He sighed before answering " I am here to be a part of the mission, same as you Dru "

He tried to avoid her eyes while talking.

Of course, he's lying! she noted with frustration; He hasn't changed at all since then.

Suddenly a warm hand pressed against her left arm. She turned around to see Thais looking concerned.

Dru inhaled sharply. She didn't want to do this here. Not now...

She turned around abruptly and left the room, hurrying down the hallway.

She had wanted to ask Kit: Why did you leave without a farewell? Why did you lie to me about my sister?

But they got lost in the thoughts that bombarded her now...

What if Ty sees him? He's going to get hurt again...Oh, what should I do? What should I do?

In the past, she had wanted to punch Kit if she met him again...for hiding the truth from her...and later on, for abandoning her brother.

Her brother, Ty... he might be here already!!

What if he's shocked by Kit's presence?  He wouldn't know, just like her, and he won't handle such surprises well.

Maybe she could get to him before he stumbled upon Kit.

She was walking fast and unaware of where she was going until she reached the end of a hallway. There was a massive wooden door.

She was about to turn back when she heard tense whispers from behind the door.

Dru inched towards the door warily.

She heard a female voice " I am quite sure of my source"

Then, a male voice commented, " 'Something precious' huh?...the last time that was used, it turned out to be Ash Morgenstern"

It was Jace.

Clary's solemn voice added, " It won't be him again, obviously... Emma and Julian saw him stay in Thule."

Ash Morgenstern...

Dru remembered Jules and Emma talking about the Seelie Queen and Sebastian's son-after they had returned from Thule.

What does he have to do with anything now?

She was startled from her thoughts by fast-approaching footsteps.

She looked up dubiously.

Sigh...It was only Thais. Dru pulled her away from the door and into a dimly-lit corridor.

Thais looked at her with indignation. " I came looking for you, Dru!!", she said.

And continued, " By the way, are you alright? I guess you've met Christopher before...I was worried there...I've never seen you act this way"

Dru took a deep breath and looked at her friend's dark brown eyes, filled with concern.

She answered " Don't worry, I'm quite alright, Thais... Yes, I know him. And his name is Kit by the way"

"Okayy...what's really up with you and mini-Jace there?" asked her friend.

Dru wasn't ready to talk about this. She had to look for Ty anyway.

She asked instead, " Thais, do you know when the centurions would be arriving?"

Thais nodded, " Oh, I'm pretty sure they're here already. In fact, I saw a glimpse of a portal in the entrance, on my way"

By the time she could finish, they heard a loud bang from the front of the institute. They jumped in surprise and moments later, both of them were hurrying towards the foyer.

Dru exited the hallway first, only to find a huge commotion.

There was a pileup of scattered weapons, interspersed with people on the floor.

She saw Louis in the dead centre, with a couple of centurions lying beside him. He seemed to be unhurt.

None of them looked injured, only bewildered.

She suddenly realized, her brother must be in this chaos.

Before she could scan the room for him, she caught a glimpse of a flash of light and a hiss of pain.

She turned impulsively towards her left to find Ty in the corner, standing behind a pillar.

She noticed him holding someone towards the wall, away from a metal shelf that had fallen to the floor. The heavy shelf had made a substantial dent on the floor. It could have severely injured the person.

She walked towards him, only to find that Ty had pushed none other than Kit- away from the shelf's path.

Besides, Ty looked visibly anxious... Dru then noticed with dread that Kit Herondale had slumped down against the wall.

Tagging @tsccreatorsnet and @uzumakiswaathi - Thank you for beta-reading and being wonderful 💕

[lovemalecforever]

Chapter 14

Parabatai : Wherever we are, we are as one.

After everyone congratulated Luke and Maryse for their engagement, they all seated themselves at the dining table, eating dinner and talking about their marriage when the old couple hushed everyone to not rush it and make it grand as they wanted it to be simple, with taking their time, much to everyone's disappointment, especially Izzy. But everyone understood their point and decided that whatever they wanted everyone was with them. The dinner went great and everyone settled back in with their own work.

_________________________

Alec was settled in his old room, the room in which he literally grew up, and Izzy had kept it the way he liked, which he was thankful for, as this room has its own set of memories, either good or bad, everything, every object had a memory of its own stuck in his mind, and he never wanted them gone.

Izzy was there in his room too, waiting for Jace and Clary to arrive, as he wanted their presence there when he talked to them because he knew that talking to them was not going to be easy, and he needed support.

"Calm down big brother, it's going to be fine." She said softly, concerned for her brother.

Alec sighed. "I don't know, Izzy."

Not long after, there was a knock on the door making him frown. 'Definitely Clary.' he thought And answered it by yelling out a loud 'Come in'.

"Hey Alec! You wanted to talk to us." Clary said while walking in, Jace tugging behind her, much to his dismay.

"Are you finally telling us what's going on?" Jace snapped, irritated.

Alec sighed and looked at both of them. "Yes, and don't ask questions or interrupt me in between, let me say what I have to say first, then only you both can say your part. Agreed?"

Jace and Clary looked at each other, then said 'okay' in unison.

Alec took a deep breath then told them everything, from being in his coma to Magnus' emotional health state, the ups and downs they faced in that one month, Magnus' breakdowns, his nightmares to their failed talks, then he himself finding of a rare immortality spell and his wish to become one, following the procedure of becoming immortal then what part they play in it. Everything. When he was done, he looked at them both having unreadable expressions on their faces.

The room was dead silent, no one was saying anything. It was getting really uncomfortable for everyone, until Clary walked towards Alec and bent down on her knees, looking directly into his eyes and only then did he notice tears in her eyes.

"I can't believe Alec, Magnus is so much in pain, and he's trying to hide it. It's really not fair on him. He's the best person I've ever known, I've ever come across. He doesn't deserve it. If that's the only option left, then I'm more than willing to help."

"A... Are, are you okay with it, Clary? Me becoming immortal?"

"Yes, Alec." She said softly.

"ABSOLUTELY NOT!" Jace yelled on top of his lungs, giving a jump scare to others present in the room.

"That's what I was scared of!" Alec mumbled under his breath and rubbed his temples.

"Jace!?" Clary exclaimed.

"What the hell Jace!? Don't you get it?" Izzy said, clearly frustrated with his response.

"No, I don't! And I don't want to. Alec Lightwood, you are not becoming an immortal, if something's wrong with your husband, talk him out of it. I'm sure it'll work out, but you are not doing anything like that. End of conversation!" He shouted.

Izzy and Clary exchanged a look then looked at Alec, who was completely quiet.

"What is wrong with you, Jace? He just said that he tried, and it failed and there's no other option left." Clary yelled at her boyfriend, trying to put some sense into him.

"And that's his decision to make Jace, not yours. I was shocked at first too, but this is what he wants I'm there for him no matter what, you should be too." Izzy said, her tone flat and stern.

"Oh really, I'm sorry to burst both of your bubbles, but it is. I'm his Parabatai. He's not just deciding for himself. Alec, you put it in your thick brain, you are NOT doing this stupidity. At. All." He yelled.

"JACE!?" Clary snapped.

Izzy looked at him with anger and frustration. "Really Jace? Why are you being so difficult? Why can't you see that it'll make both of them happy?"

"I'm being difficult." He chuckled frustratingly. "You both don't get it, do you? Oh, let me guess because you aren't Parabatai, you can't understand it. Alexander Gideon Lightwood Bane, I have made myself clear to you, you're not doing this to us. End. Of. Conversation." With that he stormed out of the room, leaving both the girls fuming at him.

"What the hell!?" Izzy shouted.

"What is wrong with him?" Clary said in frustration.

"Enough!" Alec yelled, unable to bear the tension present in that room anymore. Both girls looked at him with sympathetic eyes knowing Jace reacting like that had definitely affected him.

"Alec, I... I'll try to talk to him," Clary said, but before she could leave, Alec stopped her.

"No, wait. I'm going to talk to him, alone. And I'm sorry, but he's right. It is about our Parabatai bond. It is about us." Alec sighed heavily.

Both girls looked at him with dumbfounded expressions then at each other and nodded, and he left to search for Jace.

After searching the whole institute he finally found him in the training room, striking the dummies furiously with his seraph dagger.

"Jace, can we talk?" He asked carefully.

"There's nothing to talk about, Alec. You're not doing that stupidity. End of conversation." He said furiously, then threw his dagger on the floor, and left the room completely ignoring him.

"Jace!?" Alec yelled but to no avail, then rubbed the bridge of his nose.

He then walked towards Jace's bedroom, knowing that he would have gone there, and he was right. He walked in, closed the door, and put a locking rune on it so that he can't leave again.

"What the hell, Alec?" He shouted.

"What's going on with you, Jace? I can feel a weird kind of turmoil happening inside you. Talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about, alright. You're not becoming immortal. That's it. We're done talking."

Jace was about to walk past him when Alec stopped him by gripping his hand tightly and shoving him to his bed, resulting in a loud thud.

"Ow! Alec!" He yelled.

"Talk!" Alec said sternly.

Jace sat on the bed properly, rubbed his face, and sighed heavily. "What do want me to say, huh? Yes, I'm not fine with you becoming immortal, whatever be the reason."

"It's Magnus, Jace. And what do you think, I didn't try talking to him? I did and it didn't work. Do you think I would have ever agreed on doing this, if anything, anything had worked? He's getting worse day by day, Jace. He thinks I'm not able to see it, but I can, and it's killing me too. I'm not going to sit down and watch him get insane when I know this will solve it. That's the only option I'm left with." He said in one breath and almost a yell.

"What about us, Alec? Do you know how it will affect our Parabatai bond? Watching you live lively, young, feeling your lively emotions while I keep growing, aging. You're my brother, my Parabatai, we're supposed to die together, Alec." He said harshly, but a pool of tears was visible in his eyes.

"Then it should concern me and not you, Jace. I don't know how it'll affect our bond, but it's me who will have to watch you die, losing a part of me, you think it's easy. It's not, Jace. But it's Magnus, I love him, he's my world, I can't live without him. And it's killing me seeing him like that every passing second, his smile, it's gone. I can clearly see the pain behind his smile. I want him back, the Magnus I know, I want that Magnus back. And if it costs my mortality, then I'm ready to sacrifice it." He was out of breath when he was done, tears threatening to fall from his eyes.

Jace was already crying silently. His emotions and the words Alec had spoken were creating a whirlwind of emotions inside him. He was happy for his brother, for Magnus who got lucky to have his brother in his life, but at the same time, he was feeling betrayed that his Parabatai had decided something this big, without even talking to him about it. And also envious of the love these two have for each other.

"Jace, I can feel it, you know that, right?"

Jace looked up at his Parabatai, his eyes were red from crying. "So what, Alec? You decided something this big on your own and didn't say a word to us. Have you ever thought about any of us?"

"That's because I wasn't sure of it myself, Jace!" He yelled, he hated fighting with his Parabatai, but sometimes he gets really difficult to handle. "I didn't want to stress you all when I wasn't sure that I'll do it, but now I am. That's why I'm here, to talk to you all about it. And yes, I thought about all of you, then Magnus. Magnus is my family now too, Jace. As much as it pains, I'm willing to do it, for him, for his happiness."

Jace shook his head at him. "My Parabatai is really stubborn for his own good." He tried to smile, but it failed to reach his red cried-out eyes.

Alec sighed nervously. "Jace, please understand. I know things will change between us, but just put yourself and Clary in our situation. What if it were you both instead of us, what would have you done, Jace? Please think and answer."

The room was filled with dead silence, Jace was still sitting on his bed, head in his palms, while Alec was scared, his heart beating faster than normal, hoping his Parabatai would understand his situation, Magnus' situation. After what felt like forever for Alec, Jace finally spoke.

"I would have done the same. I had lost Clary, not to death, but I did lose her many times, even once I thought that she was actually dead, but she wasn't. I get what he's going through. We all had almost lost you in that battle." he took a deep breath and continued. "I'm sorry for yelling and being a pain, I get it, Magnus needs it. He needs you, by his side, in his case, forever. I'm sorry, buddy. I couldn't understand before, but I do now. I don't know how it'll affect our Parabatai bond, but if this is what's needed to be done, then I'm with you, it's just that...-"

Alec sighed with relief, but he knew and could feel through their bond that Jace needs him right now. He walked towards him, put his hands on his shoulders, and squeezed them gently.

"Jace!" He said softly. Jace looked up at him then stood up and hugged his brother tightly. Both knew how much they meant to each other.

Alec broke their hug but held his right wrist with his right hand. Jace looked him in the eyes, tears forming in the back of his eyes once again, he did the same.

"Entreat me not to leave thee." Alec began knowing his decision to become immortal will definitely affect their bond.

"Or return from following after thee." Jace followed, choking on each word he spoke.

"For whither thou goest, I will go." He tried to hold back his tears.

"And where thou lodgest, I will lodge." They both chuckled at this.

"Thy people shall be my people, and thy god my god." One tear escaped from Alec's eyes and fell on his cheeks.

"Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried," Jace said, each word trembling on his lips, knowing that this part is already broken.

"The angel do so to me, and more also." Alec couldn't hold back his tears from falling anymore.

"If aught but death part thee and me." They completed the oath in unison, both of their eyes red from crying.

"Jace, no matter what happens, you're my Parabatai, my brother, and it will never change, immortal or not."

Jace nodded and hugged him once again.

"So, are we okay now? You're okay with it, right?"

This time, Jace chuckled a genuine happy chuckle. "Yes, buddy we are and I am. Don't worry. Now, let's go and find the girls shall we?"

Alec agreed and unlocked the door with an opening rune, and they left the room to find the new pair of soon-to-be Parabatai.

[malecsecretsanta]

Merry Christmas, the-prophet-lemonade!

For @the-prophet-lemonade. So, I honestly panicked when I received the name of my giftee. Lucy, I did my best to put as many tropes as you like here. I hope it's not too crazy or confusing. I've never written space opera before, and it was a big challenge. I hope you like it 🙈

Read On AO3

*****

I’m gonna hold you (like I’m saying goodbye)

“Alexander!”

“On it!” Alec shouted back, sprinting through the busy, narrow alley. They’d been tailing the dragonfly-shaped creature for fifteen space jumps and through three galaxies, and they didn’t have the luxury of time to keep playing tag.

At least, Magnus didn’t have it.

Groaning, Alec saw the moment their target rose its wings and took flight.

Oh no.

That motherfucker wouldn’t.

Activating his runes, Alec jumped to his right and landed briefly on a barrel before launching himself upwards. He sprang from a windowsill on the left to a roof on the right, and pushed himself far enough to grab the creature’s tail and force them both back down.

With the natural grace of a Nephil – a blessed warrior crafted from the Creation’s purest energy – Alec landed graciously on the ground; or, more specifically, over his target’s body. Without wasting a beat, Alec unsheathed his Seraph blade and held it to the other figure’s neck.

“No more games. Where is the egg?” he asked with as much authority as he could muster, a dangerous threat lacing his voice.

The dragonfly-creature groaned, but relented, giving Alec the coordinates for the Dragon egg’s location.

“Alexander,” Magnus called again, finally reaching the Nephil. He stopped to catch his breath, having to sit for a moment. He was exhausted. The amount of power needed to keep his glamour up, hiding his scales, has been very taxing to his body lately.

Turning his head in Magnus’ direction, Alec’s face softened instantaneously. Glancing down to the robotic cat at Magnus’ feet, Alec spoke kindly. “Chairman, can you send a message to Isabelle Lightwood at the 987th octant of Idris galaxy? Tell her to come to the Seelie Planet. I got another illegal dealer.”

Chairman Meow’s face lit up in an affirmative, a rush of numbers and coordinates passing through the screen as the message was sent. Meanwhile, Alec pressed his knee more forcefully against the criminal who was still hissing and cursing him.

“For your cooperation, I’m going to request a lenient sentence for you. But if you are trying to mislead me, I swear I’ll personally throw you into the nearest black hole,” Alec growled, making Magnus snicker. He knew Alec would never do that to another living being, it was too cruel a move for his big-hearted friend; but the criminals didn’t know that, so they always complied.

Well, at least they now knew where to get the seventh Dragon egg.

~*~

The 5 th Draconic Rule – Mates

Gift – Every Dragon has a bonded mate; a soul created exclusively for their care, protection, and devotion. The bond is sacred, and its strength ensures the power and mental stability of a Dragon.

Curse – A Dragon who is without a mate on their thousandth supernoval cycle is fated to meet one of only two ends: complete madness, or death.

~*~

When the first translucent scales appeared, tiny ones near his hip, Magnus knew the clock was ticking. He would have to decide soon, and although he already knew which option it was going to be, it didn’t make taking the final leap less daunting.

His father was one of the most powerful dragons to ever exist, coming from royal lineage and with an entire planet under his claws. But his power came with a price - always a price - and his reign was tainted with blood and death.

Magnus refused to be part of it, to continue a kingdom built on pain and tears. His refusal also came with a price - when he was finally able to break free from Asmodeus, his father used one last trick.

He cursed Magnus' soul to never recognize his counterpart. Without the guide for his fated bond, he would never find his rider.

Asmodeus condemned Magnus to a lonely life with a sad end.

~*~

While waiting for the magnetic storm that would enable the space jump they needed to get to their next location, Magnus and Alec decided to venture through the heavily decorated town, full of warm lights and oddly curved, red-and-white striped decorations. The townspeople were apparently celebrating some kind of deity which was dear to their small planet, so the festivities were expected to go on for two whole weeks. A lot of visitors from other planets made the crowded streets busier than ever, the local merchants thriving as they sold their domestic goods and traditional food.

Holding each other’s hand to not get lost within the busy streets – though both knew better than to believe in that weak excuse – Magnus and Alec enjoyed the proximity and warmth of their interlaced fingers.

They had lost so much time, avoiding any attempt at something besides friendship due to their fear of an expected separation. After all, if Magnus did miraculously find his mate, their time together would end, and it would be too painful to accept that reality. All right, maybe the bond could be platonic – it had happened in other cases. But what if it wasn’t? By now, Alec knew about Magnus’ feelings for him; but what if the bond was stronger? What if Magnus fell in love at first sight with his rider?

Of course Alec would let him go, but it would hurt so much. And Magnus also knew what Alec felt, and would never want to inflict that kind of pain on him.

Their separation had maybe always been inevitable - but if they were going to save Magnus’ life, it would have to be soon, too. So, as a small mercy to themselves, they’d finally agreed to make the most of the time they still had together before…

Before whatever ending waited for them – Magnus’ salvation, or his death.

They wouldn’t put a name or label on their brief, joyful time together.

They would just be them.

Just Magnus and Alec.

They tried to have some fun, at least - and this festival was no exception. They played some of the games and won a few good prizes – which they didn’t mind giving to some of the children who looked at them with pleading eyes. They ate and drank and laughed. It was good. It didn’t feel like a big disaster was just waiting to fall on their heads at any time.

When night started to set and thousands of moonlight orbs floated in the growing light to illuminate the festival, Alec pulled Magnus aside to put something on his hand. It was a small, rectangular charm, made of red silk and golden thread.

“What is this?” There were awe and wonder in Magnus’ eyes, making them sparkle even more.

He is so beautiful. Alec smiled bashfully.

“It’s called an omamori. They are sacred to the feathered race, and I’ve heard that only those from the Phoenix constellation can make this. Each color and each thread are carefully chosen as they have different meanings, and ultimately the charm is bathed in blessed ashes mixed with powdered moonstone to strengthen its power.”

Magnus nodded slowly, taking in every detail and tracing the omamori with reverent fingers.

“What does this one mean?”

While Magnus was distracted by some silk scarves, Alec was drawn to the mystic power of a stall full of charms, which were being sold by a humanoid, copper-feathered bird wearing more jewels and chains than clothes.

The kind vendor explained the basics of omamori magic to Alec, and he felt more compelled than ever to buy one. He was torn between two – a blue and silver one, and a red and golden one, but when the vendor told him the blue and silver omamori was for success and longevity, oh… Alec felt a pang in his heart.

It would be clinging to something that would almost certainly never happen.

But the other option…

“Luck and protection.” Because if things went well? It would be by sheer luck. And protection… “Because I swore to always protect you, and I meant it - this way, if something happens and I’m not there, you’ll still be guarded.”

“Oh…” Magnus breathed softly, a small and genuine smile lighting up his face. He touched the omamori gently to his lips, his draconic eyes shining. “Thank you, Alexander.”

The soldier ducked his head and smiled, before nodding towards the food court.

“What do you say to some sweets from the Orion constellation?” They were some of Magnus’ favorites, he knew.

Magnus grinned. “You really know the way to a dragon’s heart,” he declared with a wink.

That Alec already lived in one was left unsaid.

~*~

The 9 th Draconic Rule – Scales

Gift – Every Dragon is born with silver scales, representing their purity of soul and a whole canvas of possibilities. They sing in gold when the ritual of mating is complete, and will then shift into a new color, signifying the Dragon’s new identity.

Curse – Bondless Dragons will surrender to red or black scales. Red scales for an eternal feral state and solitude. Black scales for the grief of death.

~*~

“Approaching the Dragon Sanctuary.” Alec announced through his communicator, unable to contain the excitement in his voice.

“Again?” Jace teased through the same communicator. “I don’t know why you still bother to come back to Idris at all. It’s clear you have a new home now.” Alec didn’t dignify his brother with an answer, mostly because that would mean admitting he was half-right.

Because no, Alec didn’t see Alicante as home anymore, even though he’d grown up there. But home wasn’t the Dragon Sanctuary either.

Home was a breathing thing. A person.

Or, in better terms, home was a dragon.

Alec first met Magnus when he was only sixteen. It was an odd situation, but somehow they saved each other while fighting against a group of mercenary hunters. After that, Magnus accompanied Alec for some time to make sure he would get back home without any more problems.

From there, they never stopped seeing each other. Ten years later and their visits had continued all the while. It was hard sometimes, since they lived in different galaxies; but Alec was one of the best warriors and pilots from Idris galaxy, and it wasn’t a problem for him to escape sometimes to go and see the one who made his heart beat a little faster and his mind spin.

Turning off the communicator once more, Alec finished the landing procedures, and stepped out of the craft onto the grass surrounding Magnus’ nest.

When he felt something quickly curl around his body, he didn’t even flinch. He would recognize that warmth and sandalwood scent anywhere.

“Hey,” Alec grinned, petting the dragon’s head as it kept nuzzling his cheek. Magnus’ true form was much, much bigger than this one, but he liked to say that this was the perfect size to cuddle Alec.

“Hello, pretty boy.” Magnus’ voice in his draconic form was a bit deeper, but still soft, with a musical lilt. “Missed my eyes?” As if to make his point, he lifted his head and golden, slitted eyes bored into Alec’s hazel ones, until a flirtatious wink broke the spell.

“Actually, I missed all of you, not only the eyes.” Alec answered bluntly as always, making Magnus pause in surprise and then burst out in delighted laughter.

A second later, Magnus shifted back into his human form, magic already wrapping him in clothes. Still, he didn’t let go of Alec and hugged the Nephil for a little longer.

Magnus wasn’t one to hug much – that was more Alec’s department – so when the dragon lingered longer and actually tightened the embrace a bit desperately, Alec knew something was wrong.

“What is it?” Alec pulled gently away so that he could turn and look at Magnus, and his smile faltered when he saw the dragon’s crestfallen face.

Instead of replying, Magnus just pulled back part of his cloak, showing his collarbones. And showing the translucent scales that glinted on his skin.

Translucent scales, on his human form.

Alec felt his face drain of color, and he grabbed urgently at Magnus’ shoulders. “When?”

“Last week,” Magnus mumbled. “This is why I asked you to come a little earlier. You… you know what this means.”

“Magnus…” Alec felt his heart ready to combust from sheer panic. “Your choice… What choice have you made?”

Magnus flinched at that, and right then Alec had his answer. He closed his eyes, willing the tears to not come.

Of course. Of course Magnus would want that.

Without his soulmate, spending the rest of his eternal life as a barely-sentient, feral creature would be Magnus’ worst nightmare.

Of course he would choose death.

But Alec had barely opened his mouth to protest when two other dragons landed beside them.

“Cat, Ragnor, good of you to join the party.” Magnus smiled, putting on that happy façade which Alec absolutely hated to see on his friend’s face.

Catarina and Ragnor were Magnus’ best friends, and together they formed a trio of unshakable loyalty and care. However, unlike Magnus, those two already had riders with platonic bonds. Ragnor, whose scales were the beautiful green of a forest touched by the first rays of light after dawn and whose horns had a curvature bigger than his head, was bonded to a priest called Raphael. And Cat, whose scales were the fresh blue of the clearest ocean, was bonded to a little girl called Madzie who was still learning how to be a rider.

As for Magnus…

Alec thought about Magnus’ silver scales. Usually they were a dragon’s version of ‘plain’, but Magnus was always adorning them with jewelry, until he not only shined but sparkled like a gemstone in the sun. But still, all the decoration in the world didn’t change the message a silver scale sent.

Magnus was bondless.

He was alone.

He had no one to care for him, to love him.

Alec sighed inwardly. What an ugly lie. If he could…

But that thought was quickly interrupted by Cat dropping yet another bombshell.

“We found a solution,” she began, speaking as soon as she shifted back into her human form. “It was hard, but the Elders finally yielded. Have you ever heard of the Journey of Eight?”

“Isn’t that a myth?” Magnus frowned.

“All myths are real, dumbass.” Ragnor grumbled, also shifting. Then, he turned to Alec, who presumably looked very lost. “Dragon eggs are rare and very precious for us,” he explained, “but they also emanate a lot of power, which unfortunately serves to draw untowards attention.”

Alec nodded, already aware of that fact. Dragon eggs were on the top of mercenary hunters’ list to acquire. A small piece was worth a fortune capable of sustaining a family for three generations.

“When a Dragon is born, no matter where it is in the Universe, it’s imperative that the remnants of the egg should be destroyed, or else anyone could get their hands on it.” Cat continued. “But there are rumors of Dragons who didn’t have the chance to do that, so some of their egg remains.”

“There is even one in a fucking museum,” Ragnor grumbled.

Catarina grimaced. “Yes, there is. But our point is - Magnus, if you collect one piece of eight different eggs, their power would be enough to fuel a ritual that will point in the direction of your rider, no matter how far away they are.”

“What?” Magnus spluttered, and Alec felt the same, torn between shock and hope.

Magnus could be saved.

“Do you know the coordinates for those pieces? I can go take them right now!” Alec stood at attention, a soldier more than eager to take orders and act.

“Alexander!” Now Magnus was the shocked one. “My thousandth cycle is in a month's time. It’s impossible to search through millions of galaxies in that time.”

“But we have to at least try,” Alec insisted. “Listen, my ship is fast. I’m a good pilot. If I have the coordinates? I don’t care if I have to make five hundred jumps, or five thousand jumps, Magnus. I won’t miss this opportunity to help you.”

Magnus’ Adam’s apple bobbed painfully as he swallowed. That sweet, sweet man.

Biting his lower lip, Magnus nodded, a fierce expression crossing his face.

“I’m coming with you.”

“Magnus, I can handle–”

“No, this is non-negotiable. The Dragon eggs are for me, so I decide that. Besides…” Bringing a hand to his lips, Magnus whistled loudly.

Seconds later, his robotic cat – Chairman Meow – came running from Magnus’ nest. As cute and small Chairman looked, Alec knew better.

That robot knew one hundred ways to kill and hide the body without anyone knowing.

“Chairman only goes where I go.” Magnus grinned. “And my intuition tells me he will be a very useful addition to our team.”

~*~

The snow drifted slowly, dancing and tumbling in the air like fireflies. It was beautiful, especially when the scarce light caught it and reflected a fleeting, pocket-sized aurora. However, as pretty as it might be, it was also a sign of the steely and dangerous cold. The situation of sharing a single bed seemed less ‘odd’ and more like an obviously excellent idea, the two of them bundling up under the same blanket to keep themselves warm.

Alec didn’t mind, especially since he would do anything to stop Magnus’ shivering body from shutting down. The fire in the hearth wasn’t enough anymore, hadn’t been for hours. Chairman Meow had already needed to activate one of his survival mode settings, too, turning into a small space heater to keep the chill at bay.

Magnus was running out of time.

Not only his body was starting to freeze from inside out, his blood running sluggishly, but more scales were blooming and darkening. They’d already advanced over his neck and reached his chin, and by now they were half-covering his forearms and thighs, too.

They were killing him.

Alec let out a shuddering breath and held Magnus more tightly against his own body, earning a weak, content sigh from the dragon. Looking out of the window, past the snow and lights, Alec sent up a prayer - or just a desperate plea - to the stars hidden up above, or whatever power lurked behind them.

Please, don’t take him away from me. Give us more time. Please, please.

~*~

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

This wasn’t supposed to happen. The last Dragon egg was said to be inside a cave that only other dragons could locate, and Magnus found it easily - but they hadn't expected to also find mercenary hunters. It was unbelievable that even after Valentine’s demise, his goons were still out there causing havoc, enacting his toxic and distorted vision.

Fucking dammit.

Nothing was easy, huh?

When they’d retrieved the first few egg fragments, fights hadn’t been a problem - Alec and Magnus worked well as partners in battle. But now, with Magnus growing ever weaker, the only way they stood half a chance was if Chairman Meow was also actively helping them fight.

Which meant it was a good thing the cat was programmed to spit fire. Bless Magnus for having insisted on bringing him with them - a portable flamethrower was exactly what they needed, especially after Alec’s second Seraph blade fell into the river of lava below.

After all, going for a swim to retrieve it was hardly an option.

Magnus finally reached the eggshell fragment - the last piece they needed, hidden in a glamoured nest. Alec was still finishing off the last hunters, struggling without Magnus’ help and his increasing fatigue. By now, he’d lost not only both blades, but also his bow - he was using his arrows as last-resort weapons, now. Eventually, though, one of them struck home in the eye of the last hunter standing, and Alec slumped, catching his breath.

It was too soon.

One of the hunters who was already down – an elemental demon, who despite his half-burned body suddenly seemed to find a last burst of energy - struck out, launching a ball of raw elemental power at Alec.

Alec barely had time to blink before Magnus pushed him out of the way and took the brunt of it.

“NO!” Alec screamed, crashing to his knees. “You fucking stupid, fucking idiot…” He crawled over to Magnus and cradled his limp form, anguish threatening to swallow him whole even as he brought the dragon as close as possible.

“Not… charming, darling…” Magnus coughed, blinking sluggishly.

“Don’t care. How many times have we talked about your dumb self-sacrificing tendencies? You are not a fucking living shield!”

“You’re one to talk. Also, you are saying the word ‘fucking’ far too much, Alexander. Is there some kind of urge you’re trying to hint at right now?” Magnus gave a wobbly smile, as well as a bleary, poor attempt at a wink.

“Stop flirting,” Alec chastised, a lopsided grin slowly blooming on his own lips despite his rising fear.

Magnus hummed in acknowledgment, but no other quip came forth. Instead, his eyes closed and didn’t open again.

“Magnus?” Nothing. “Magnus, hey-” He shook the dragon a little bit, Magnus staying unresponsive - but the change in position illuminated black scales, new ones, growing on his face.

They were out of time.

Resisting the urge to break down right there, Alec lifted Magnus up and strode towards his ship.

They had to go back to the Dragon Sanctuary now.

~*~

Alec could count on only one hand how many times he left his ship to navigate by autopilot. It’s not that the AI wasn’t efficient; Alicante’s technology was undeniably some of the best in the known Universe. Most of his people still believed it to be their divine right, as they were the chosen ones from the Creation itself.

There was a time Alec also believed in that natural, just superiority. Until...

A weak tremor caught his attention and he looked back down at the man still cradled in his arms. Magnus’ human form was fading. His breathing was ragged and his pulse was weak.

“Fuck,” Alec cursed, his eyes blowing wide in panic. “Church, go faster!”

“We are already at maximum speed, sir.”

Alec cursed again. He needed to pilot the ship manually, so he could break past the damn protocols and force the system to crash its primary settings. Without the restraints implanted by the Clave, he could burn up all of the stamina core in minutes and increase their speed tenfold.

He’d be in big trouble for it, of course, but he didn’t care. Magnus was his priority.

He had been for a long time.

AIs weren’t made to enter a gravitational field by themselves, the unpredictable shifts in G making the systems unstable to the point of shutdown. Always, always turning off the autopilot and navigating manually through gravitational fields was one of the first things Alec had learned at Alicante Academy.

But right now, he either piloted or held Magnus. He couldn’t do both, and maybe they needed the speed, but putting Magnus down away from his warmth and posture support was out of the question.

So, Alec made his choice.

And he could only pray it was the right one.

ATTENTION

ATTENTION

SAFETY PROTOCOL MALFUNCTION

CRASH LANDING IMMINENT

“Chairman, secure us!” Alec yelled amidst the blaring alarms, and the robot promptly leaped into action. Elongating his tail, he fastened it around Alec and Magnus, pinning them on the makeshift bed. His claws also grew and penetrated the metal floor, firmly holding onto it.

Alec closed his eyes and waited, hoping for the best. And if the worst happened instead?

Well, Magnus was already dying.

At least he wouldn’t die alone.

ATTENTION

ATTENTION

TRAJECTORY UNSAFE

CRASH LANDING IMMI-

~*~

The 6 th Draconic Rule – Bonds

Gift – The bonds have two different natures; they can be either platonic or romantic. The platonic bond is more common, but the romantic bond is more powerful. Combined with partnership, the soul bond allows for total connection and shared strength.

Curse – A rider can reject a bond if they do not desire to be by their Dragon’s side. The pain of rejection is visceral. Death is considered a far kinder fate.

~*~

“…wood. Lightwood! Bloody hell, boy! Where did you learn to pilot? Your ship is a goddamned wreck-”

“Ragnor, if you aren’t going to help, do be quiet. Concussions don’t heal themselves, I have work to do.”

“Just wake him, for fuck’s sake! Concussion or not, he’s the only one here who can take Magnus to the fountain, and if he doesn’t damn well hurry up-”

Alec’s eyes snapped open, his body jackknifing upwards. Instinct kicked in before recognition, his frantic heart threatening to escape from his chest, and he reached for Magnus – who was still unconscious and laying beside him.

With trembling fingers, he pressed down on the pulse point at Magnus’.

It was so faint…

“Alec, we’re nearly out of time.” His attention finally snapped upwards to the two other dragons present, his brain kicking back into gear with a spike of hope. If Catarina and Ragnor were there, that meant they did it, they reached the Dragon Sanctuary. “Did you get all eight pieces?”

Alec nodded, grabbing at the small satchel attached to the cord on his neck.

“Perfect. We have to go.” Cat opened a portal and stepped through it without missing a beat. Ragnor followed, looking back at Alec one last time with a worried glare that quite clearly meant hurry the fuck up.

Alec didn’t need to be told twice. He lifted Magnus into his arms once more, and the two of them disappeared through the portal.

On the other side, Alec stepped out into the most majestic scenery he’d ever seen. They were inside some kind of cavern, what looked like the base of a mountain with how high it was, the ceiling barely visible. The walls and whole swathes of the floor were covered with stalagmites so clear, they seemed made of pure crystal.

A moment later, the torches around them flared to life, and produced a whole spectrum of colors and magic and sound.

Alec didn’t know how that was possible, but it was like the stones were humming some kind of melody.

In the center of everything, there was a fountain – the water so crystal blue, it was easy to see the sigils and marks on the bottom of it. Around it, exactly eight bowls – equally distanced from each other – with eight black candles already alight, burning gold as Cat or Ragnor threw a piece of dragon egg into each flame.

When the last piece was burned, the entire fountain began to shine.

“Put him in the water, now!” Ragnor practically roared, but Alec was already in motion, leaping straight into the center of the water; Magnus floated freely, but Alec couldn’t step away, opened his mouth to ask if the ritual would work with him there and-

The water pulsed.

No, wait - it was Magnus’ body pulsing, his soul looking for its counterpart.

Three beats later, everything stilled.

Alec waited with bated breath, expecting at any moment to see some kind of magical arrow appear, pointing to where Magnus’ soulmate was.

But absolutely nothing happened.

Alec’s heart plummeted. They were too late, they- “No, no, no,” he mumbled, his hands twitching at his sides. “Why didn't it work? He needs his rider. Why–”

“Alec,” Cat interrupted him, but not unkindly. “Look down.”

Blinking hard, he did exactly that.

There was a gold thread coming out from Magnus’ chest and connecting to…

Oh.

Connecting to his own chest.

It was him? He was Magnus’ rider?

Another pulse, and something – something ancient and powerful – whispered in his ear.

And suddenly, Alec knew exactly what to do.

Lowering himself further into the water and bringing Magnus into his arms once more, he kissed his dragon’s forehead, and then began to chant in a strong, quiet voice.

“Thee and me ever entwin'd

Dragon of mine, heart of blissful shine

I bond myself to thee, now and forever

Dragon of mine, mine own eternal shrine”

A pulse.

The water shone silver.

Another pulse.

And like molten obsidian, Magnus’ scales turned from black to gold.

Another pulse, and another, and another and another-

The cave was coming alive like a dormant heart, beating against long-worn stillness. And then it breathed - and Magnus transformed, his bones shifting under blinding light, stretching into a dragon form that was so big, he ended up occupying almost the entire fountain.

When the light dissipated, his scales weren’t gold anymore.

Nor – thankfully – black.

They were a mesmerizing azure blue.

Alec bit back a cry of joy, and relief, and excitement. Magnus was saved.

Magnus was going to be alright.

“My rider,” Magnus rumbled, lowering his head – so big, just his eye was bigger than Alec’s head – and nuzzled against Alec’s chest. “My darling Alexander. It has always been you.”

“Yeah…” Alec closed his eyes, feeling all the tension leave him at once, and letting himself snuggle against Magnus. Suddenly, a chuckle slipped free. “I can’t believe that damn curse prevented us from seeing the obvious.”

“I can’t believe it worked; I was almost certain that the eggs wouldn’t help,” Magnus hummed. “Even if they pointed to the direction where my rider was supposed to be, there was still the possibility of them being too far away for me to get there in time. Or they could have been dead. Or… or they could have rejected me.”

Now that they were bonded, Alec could feel the fear bleeding from Magnus’ words, and it made his own heart ache. “So why did you want to go through all that trouble just to get them?” he asked, frowning.

“To be with you,” the dragon replied simply. “If I was going to die, I wanted to spend my last moments with the person who made me the happiest.”

“Magnus…” Alec felt a lump rise to his throat, and held his dragon a little tighter. Just thinking about Magnus’ demise was enough to make him shiver. He hoped to never feel that fear again.

“Oddly enough, Magnus is right,” Catarina suddenly said, drawing their attention. “The eggs didn’t help at all, really.” She grinned at their clear confusion. “I’m sorry for the deception, but it was the only way. The truth is, it was never about the eggs. It was about the journey - your journey.” Her smile softened. “You two already had a natural bond in place, but Asmodeus’ curse was messing with the nature of it. You fell in love without knowing you were soulmates.”

Alec blushed. Love… Even if they had never put a label on what they were, on what they felt for the other…

Love felt very right.

“That’s also why Magnus didn’t fade so fast,” Ragnor added. “Had he spent that length of time alone, he never would have stood a chance. He could only hold on because you were always together.”

At that moment, Magnus returned to his human form, and for the first time in months, he looked healthy. Alec was so relieved, he felt like crying.

Naturally, Magnus immediately broke the moment. “Now you don’t have an excuse not to ride me, Alexander,” he declared with a smirk.

Alec snorted, but the sound was too close to a sob. He thought he was going to lose that, too. Magnus’ terrible jokes and shameless flirtations. Unable to stand even a tiny distance any longer, he practically threw himself at Magnus, hugging him firmly and burying his face in the crook of his neck.

“I promise to always protect you,” he said fiercely. “Nothing bad will happen to you again. I’ll be by your side every step of the way.”

“This sounds awfully like a wedding vow, darling,” Magnus teased - but there was a note of insecurity in his voice, too.

“I mean, we can get married, can’t we?” Still holding his soulmate, Alec turned to Cat and Ragnor, as if looking for their blessing. After getting a nod and appreciative smiles from both, Alec turned back to Magnus and held his face with the utmost care and affection.

Then, he leaned in and finally, finally kissed Magnus.

Magnus kissed back with equal fervor, yearning for the sweet contact he’d craved for so long. They only pulled apart to finally say what could no longer be contained - the only words that really mattered, the ones they needed to pronounce and hear more than they needed air to breathe.

“I love you.”

I love you, I love you, I love you.

[thebiasrekkers]

Fragmentation 0.2 - PJM

Plot: How does one measure freedom? Are our choices truly our own, or are they part of a preset design outside of our control? We all have a question burning inside of us, though few speak it out. It is the question that drives us forward, seeking purpose in our lives. What is The Matrix?

Rating: NC-17 // NSFW

Genre: Series | The Matrix!AU | angst | sci-fi | action | drama

Pairing: N/A

Warnings: Strong language, allusions to suicide, extreme angst, graphic violence

Links: FAQ || BTS Masterlist || Admin E’s AO3 || [ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ]

Word Count: 3,068

AN: Alright guys, get ready for these to hit the timeline back to back! I hope you’re ready! I thoroughly enjoyed writing these and yes, because it’s The Matrix, we are going to get dark in this piece. As I stated before, all information in the universe can be found on the official Matrix Wiki so please use that as a reference guide if you ever get confused!

Tag List: @aroseforyoongi​, @prisczero​, @pinkpjmin​, @btsaudge​, @flowerwrites06​, @unoriginal-username15432​

© thebiasrekkers (Admin E). All rights reserved. Reposting/modifying our work is prohibited. Translations are not allowed. Plagiarism/stealing is not tolerated by any means. Legal action will be taken in instances of theft.

“Jimin! Aren’t you coming?”

Jimin casually glanced over his shoulder, readjusting the strap to his backpack in a more comfortable position. A few of his classmates waved to him, urging him to come along. They were finished with their studies for the day and didn’t have any after school activities that required their attention. Normally, they would head to the arcade to mindlessly spend the quarters weighing their pockets down. 

He smiled, shaking his head and waving back at them. “No, you guys go on ahead. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

His friends pouted, canting their heads slightly before shrugging. They laughed as they turned to head down the street, all of them declaring loudly how they were going to beat the other into submission in a round of Street Fighter.

Sighing, Jimin pushed his way through the crowd to head to the local library. The internet was faster there and he could focus on what he wanted to work on in peace and quiet. Stopping at a vending machine on the way, he bought a few drinks and some snacks to tide him over until he was forced to stop working due to needing sleep. 

It wasn’t like there was anyone waiting for him at home anyway.

Hopping up the stone steps, he entered through the front door and smiled at the library clerk. She was a pretty woman - at least pretty in terms of being an old lady. Late fifties to early sixties at best, he could guess. Jimin never told her his name, however, but she didn’t mind. She always referred to him as “Young Man” and he answered readily with a smile.

“Research again, Young Man?” she asked, holding out a book for him.

Jimin took the item from her, already knowing that she wanted him to put it back where it was supposed to go. He smiled. “Yes ma’am.” He eyed the cover. “Ching Dynasty in the History section, right?”

The old lady beamed at him. “Correct. You’re such a good lad.”

“I try,” he said with a laugh.

“Well, don’t work too hard. I know you’ve been focusing very hard on your project these last few weeks, but you’re young and shouldn’t strain your eyes so much.”

Jimin bowed his head slightly. “I won’t. Thank you.”

He quickly maneuvered around the library, locating the history section and replaced the book. He always had a knack of finding things and Jimin just knew when things were out of place. His teachers called it a “gift” but he had a feeling that it was something else entirely. He just couldn’t place it. Not yet, at least.

Making his way toward the back of the library, he reached a few taupe colored desks nestled in a small nook in the corner. He threw his backpack on top of the shelf portion, unzipping the top and rifling around inside. He pulled out two mini discs and one floppy disc. Reaching further into the pack, his fingers wrapped around the mini computer and the wires needed to make the device work. He wasted no time booting up the computer, setting up the small computer beside the motherboard and plugging things in.

It only took him a few minutes to go through various checks to make sure that his connection was secure. Then he pulled up a few console windows, his fingers typing swiftly over the keys.

???: 

He couldn’t describe the wave of relief that hit him when he saw his chat partner beginning the conversation. Lately Jimin had to be the one to initiate the chat, hoping that he reached them. 

Cobra:

Jimin felt a bead of sweat forming on the bridge of his nose. He knew that this could possibly chase them away. But there was a chance that it wouldn’t. And the information his friend gave him was too profound to ignore.

???: 

Cobra:

???:

Cobra:

???:

It was now or never. Jimin felt like if he didn’t take advantage of this opportunity now, he would never get another one. His chance to obtain the answers to his questions would slip through his fingers like sand. He wouldn’t be able to recover it fast enough.

Cobra:

???:

Cobra:

???:

Blinking at the screen, Jimin reached under the desk and began patting around the surface beneath. His thumb brushed up against something. Curling his fingers around it, he pulled it free - the distinct sound of velcro separating shockingly loud in the quiet confines of his corner. Jimin inspected it, not sure what to make of the item his friend left for him. It was no bigger than a pack of cigarettes, but the container was made of metal.

When did they prepare this?

Though the more pressing question was how did they know he would be sitting at that particular desk on that particular day?

Just how close was his friend?

Jimin couldn’t stop the cold shiver from snaking up his back. He was nervous, but excited. Something was wrong with him.

Cobra:

???:

He watched his friend go offline, leaving him alone. He could sense that there wasn’t much time. Jimin quickly logged off, turned off the computer and haphazardly threw all of his things into his bag. Stuffing the small metal container into his inner jacket pocket, he slung the backpack over his shoulder and made his way to the entrance of the stairs.

The library building was tall - at least thirty stories. Jimin climbed them all. He wasn’t sure if it was nerves hammering around inside of his chest or the adrenaline of excitement rushing his footsteps, but he didn’t care. After months of secret conversations, he was finally going to learn something. He would release the pressure at the back of his brain, telling him that something was wrong with the world that he lived in.

Bursting through the rooftop access door, Jimin was greeted with a swift burst of cold air. The sun had long since set. He didn’t remember being in the library for very long. Was it already that late?

Jimin sensed a flash of movement from his right, his body reacting faster than his mind could process. Leaning back, he dodged a fist that was aimed for the side of his head. Pivoting on his heels, he spun out of reach just as another fist shot out - hoping to strike true. 

“Hey!” he yelled, stumbling back a few paces. “What’s the big idea?!”

Standing in front of him was a man no taller than him - Asian in origin, though he could only guess that he was of Chinese descent based on his clothing choice. He wore an off white changsan, a black fitted shirt underneath, and long wide leg pants. His eyes were hidden behind a pair of sunglasses - the lenses small and round. His hair was cut short - military-style buzz cut. The man was clearly skilled in martial arts.

Jimin watched him smile and this only caused his irritation to mount further. Hadn’t his friend told him that he could trust the person he was meeting on the roof? Was this all a setup?

The man lowered his stance, placing a palm over one fist and bowing his head. After a few seconds, Jimin bowed his head also, but maintained eye contact with him. The man continued to smile at him.

“You have very good reflexes for one so young,” he complimented.

Jimin shrugged. “I guess so.”

“You move like a cobra.” He lowered his arms down to his sides. “I am Seraph. I will guide you to The Oracle.”

“The Oracle?” Jimin couldn’t hide the confused expression on his face. He’d heard rumors online about someone with that moniker, but he figured it was just some myth circulating through the dark net. “I’m...meeting The Oracle.”

Seraph nodded, fishing into his pocket as he approached the roof access door. “Yes. She has much to discuss with you. But we must hurry.” He pulled out a small ring of keys, sliding one of them into the lock. “We don’t have much time.”

Before Jimin could question Seraph’s sanity, he watched the man open the door. But instead of a set of stairs, he could see a back alley in its place. His lips parted, unable to properly fathom what he’d just seen. The moisture left his mouth and a throbbing pain began drilling into the back of his head. Seraph was instantly at his side, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

“You have to remain calm. Take a few deep breaths.”

He felt like he was choking. “W-What is going on?”

“Breathe, Cobra. If your mental acuity spikes too much, they will be able to locate us.”

“T-They?”

“We need to go. Now.”

It was painful for him to nod, but Seraph helped him toward the door. Once inside the alley, he watched Seraph closing the door and locking it behind them. The street lights flickered sporadically, serving as a guide through the darkness. If Seraph was speaking to him, which he doubted, he didn’t think he would be able to hear him over the thunder of his own heartbeat. 

Jimin didn’t remember seeing Seraph unlocking another door, or the two more after that, but he was jolted to a sudden halt when they stood in front of a bright red door. It looked like the kind of door that belonged to a quaint house in the suburbs. The kind of house a normal, loving family would have attached to their single family home. 

Seraph motioned for Jimin to open it, as this door was not locked. Or, at least, he could only assume that it wasn’t since he hadn’t seen Seraph pulling out a key from his key ring. He grabbed for the brass handle and turned the knob, pushing the door open and stepping over the threshold.

There was a sweet aroma hovering in the air, making Jimin’s mouth water instantly. In all of the controlled chaos, he’d forgotten to eat. The soft tones of jazz came from a radio in the kitchen. He followed the sounds and stopped at the entrance.

Standing by the stove was a woman who looked to be in her mid to late fifties. She was a little heavier built, but her curves were defined and lovely in a sweet sort of way. Her back was to him, but through her dark curls he saw strands of gray peppered throughout. Smoke billowed from an ashtray nearby where an abandoned cigarette rested against one of the center notches. 

“Um,” he finally managed, taking a step forward, “excuse me?”

“Just a minute,” said the woman, her voice hauntingly familiar, “they’re almost finished. You might want to have a seat.”

Jimin reigned his curiosity back as he watched the woman lean over to pull a tray of cookies out of the oven. Heat rushed through the kitchen from the stove, warming him from the inside out. She set the tray down on the counter, giving the pastries a chance to cool. As she wiped her hands on her apron, she turned to look at Jimin and he immediately lost his balance. He blindly reached for the nearest chair, collapsing into it.

“It...It’s you,” he stammered, looking at the woman he’d come to know as the kind library clerk, “but how?”

The woman smiled, reaching for her cigarette. She took a drag, exhaling smoke from her nostrils. “I told you to have a seat.”

His eyes shook, darting in every direction before landing back on her. None of this made any sense. Jimin’s gaze moved to the floor as he tried to calm his breathing, placing a hand on his chest in an almost vain attempt to settle his rattled nerves. He watched the woman’s shadow move closer to him until she, too, was sitting across from him. When he looked up, the older woman was holding out a plate to him - a single cookie placed in the center.

“Here. I know you’re probably hungry. This will tide you over until dinner is finished.”

He unconsciously took the cookie off the plate, but he was unsure of whether to eat it or not. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust it was safe to eat. He wasn’t sure he would be able to keep it down.

She set a glass of water in front of him. “Now listen to me, Cobra. We don’t have a whole lot of time. I’m sure you’re just as aware of that fact as I am.”

Jimin reached a trembling hand toward the glass. “Are you really The Oracle?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” The Oracle chuckled as she tapped a bit of ash off into the tray. “So many questions and yet I knew that would be the first one you’d ask.”

He drained half the glass in a single gulp. “Something is happening to me.”

“Yes, it is.” She pressed the cigarette to her lips. “It’s been happening for a while now.”

“Are you responsible for it?”

“No, Cobra.” The Oracle blew smoke out of her mouth. “You are.”

“What?”

“Did you bring the package with you?”

Jimin frowned. “If you’re The Oracle, shouldn’t you know that answer already?”

Again, she chuckled. “I do. I’m asking more for your sake than my own. You look ready to pop.”

His fingers moved from the glass and toward his pocket. He pulled out the small metal case and placed it on the table between them. Instead of reaching for it, however, The Oracle gestured toward him.

“Go on. Open it.”

Jimin opened the box, unsure of what he was actually looking at. Inside were what appeared to be two gel caplets. One red, the other blue. A bead of sweat slid down from his temple to his chin, dripping onto the top of his shoe. He slowly lifted his face to look at The Oracle who still had a calm expression painted over her features.

“Like I said earlier, Cobra, we don’t have a lot of time. I can only apologize for taking so long to close the distance between us. If I’d been faster, then we wouldn’t be rushing now.”

“Rushing for what?”

“To give you the answers you so desperately seek.” She crushed the ember of her cigarette out into the tray. “You have a choice to make. Right now. If you still want to know the truth about everything, about why you feel like the world around you doesn’t make sense, or why you feel so isolated in it, then take the red pill and seek the answers out for yourself.”

“And how am I supposed to do that?” Tears welled up at the corners of his eyes. “How am I supposed to do that alone?”

The Oracle reached out a hand to cup his cheek. Her touch was warm; comforting. It helped relax his already fraying nerves. Her thumb stroked over the corner of his eye, wiping the tear away. “Oh, honey, you won’t be alone.” She looked every bit like a mother comforting a scared child in that instant. “But I won’t lie to you, the truth is going to be hard to swallow. Harder than that pill. You’ll probably hate me after you find out the truth. If you feel you won’t be able to handle any of that, then take the blue pill. You’ll forget all about me and what you’ve seen the very minute you step out that door.”

She removed her hand from his cheek, making him very aware of how cold the world seemed at the absence of her touch. Jimin eyed the pills in the box. What did he have to lose by taking the red pill and finding out the truth? His life here was meaningless - just an endless sequence of purposeless days bleeding into purposeless weeks, meshing into equally purposeless months until years with no purpose marched on.

Plucking the red pill from the foam cushion in the box, he popped it into his mouth without hesitation. He grabbed the glass of water and gulped down what remained, swallowing it. 

The Oracle suddenly grabbed Jimin’s hand just as he set the glass back down on the table. “Listen to me very carefully, Cobra. I need you to remember what I tell you when you wake up.”

“W-What do you mean?” Jimin’s vision began to swim momentarily. His auditory senses almost seemed heightened at that moment and he heard several heavy footsteps approaching from the living room. 

“You are going to find The One. That is the path that you have chosen for yourself.” The Oracle pressed both of her hands on either side of his face. “Believe in that path. When you discover the truth, you will come to understand the meaning behind my words.”

“Oracle, please,” Jimin managed to choke out, “I don’t understand…”

He saw several shadows circling him and different voices began talking all at once. 

“We’ve almost narrowed down his location,” said a man to his right, “we need just a few more seconds.”

Jimin gripped onto the woman’s arms in desperation. “I’m scared!”

“It’s okay to be scared. That’s normal, I promise.” The Oracle pressed a kiss to his forehead and he the distinct smell of cookies and cigarettes filled his nose. “Remember my words, Cobra. Know the path and walk the path you forge for yourself.”

“Got him!”

The world seemed to tunnel vision around him, causing his vision to grow darker by the second.

“Will I see you again?” he said through his tears.

“Yes, Young Man,” she replied with a smile he could barely see, “you will.”

And then everything flickered to black and green, the entire room transforming into strings of code. Jimin let out a scream before darkness completely overtook his sight.

“Welcome to the Real World.”