#for the LAST half hour

[gibbearish]

i have been on hold with rite aid. for an hour and 15 minutes

[umblrspectrum]

i hate perspective. happy new years also

[runawaymarbles]

guess who just got exposed to WHOOPING COUGH!!!!!!! *jazz hands*

[demaparbat-hp]

Thinking about @stygiovictoria's Roleswap AU.

[chongoblog]

We watched a movie called "Bigfoot vs DB Cooper" and it is not at all what would you expect it to be. It warped my perception of time. It made me feel something.

[echosdevil]

gemma scout as snoopy

[milk-ly]

Life?

[captmuldoon]

the most insane thing about moby dick is that i have never, ever felt more of a personal connection with a narrator - in the way that i feel like ishmael really is telling me the story. that i'm some stranger that happened to sit beside him, maybe ask his name, and suddenly he's taken my hand and telling me his story. except he suddenly disappears from his story, and it barely seems about him anymore. it's about the crew, it's about queequeg, it's about the young boy pip, it's about starbuck and the family he'll never see again, it's about ahab, it's about the ship, it's about the brutality of the whaling industry, it's about the beauty of these men who take it on, and the beauty of the creatures they hunt, and it's about god and how small and insignificant we are. and suddenly ishmael allows himself back into the story but it doesn't change anything. everything and everyone is dead and gone. 'and i only am escaped alone to tell thee.' the drama's done and the sea rolls on just as it did 5,000 years ago. the story is all ishmael has left of them. it's all he can give you. 'do you understand?' ishmael is asking you. 'can you bear the weight of their story? when remembering is all we can do to give any of this meaning? can you give any of this meaning?' and it's too late for you. you carry the story now, too. now you have to remember. grieve and remember and give it meaning.

[bluerosefox]

Drake Siblings

Have I read this prompt somewhere or was this a fever dream from my bored mind.

What if, now hear me out.

What if we bring up Dana Winters-Drake (whose confirmed to at least be alive in the DC verse but no one knows where she actually is)

What if instead of when she had a mental breakdown and getting committed to an Bludhaven clinc she wandered away before anyone noticed and by the time Tim or anyone did notice a lot of stuff started happening at once in both Gotham and Bludhaven (Steph dying, The Bludhaven crisis, etc etc)

Tim still tries to find her though but even with best resources it was like she just disappeared into the wilderness and the stress of trying to handle more and more problems get worse.

So when out of the blue, a couple of years later, he gets a call from an unknown number. On his private, only for friends and family, phone and when he answers he meet with a young girls voice on the other end.

A very young, maybe six or seven, girl who informs him about his apparently half-brother Danny Drake-Fenton. And how she loves Danny so, so, so much but knows her home is dangerous for him to be in.

Tim is stunned and before he could question her, she says Danny is Dana and Jack's baby and that her parents had adopted him years ago and put Dana's stuff that the hospital had away for him to look at when he was older but she just had to fight off their lunch from eating her brother and she knows he needs a better place to live and so she snooped around and found Dana's diary and that she had to unscramble the nonsense Dana wrote and found Tim's number with the words 'tell him about his brother Danny' hidden in it. And-

But before she could keep rambling she hears Danny screaming "JAZZY THE MILK WENT BAD AGAIN AND HISSED AT ME!"

Tim is left with silence after hearing Jazz yell to Danny to lock the fridge and step out of the kitchen as she gets the bat.

[crybaby-bkg]

I think Deku has a bit of a mean streak, actually. he’s no Bakugou—that’s for sure—but he’s not this innocent, sweet angel baby that the media has painted him out to be. but you only catch it when you least expect it, when you’re pushing his nerves, when the stakes to everything around him are high, when he’s tired of endless sleepless nights and just—snaps.

“Oh?” you go, grin unfurling like some grinch, chin resting on your hands as you leer at him from across his expansive desk. “You’re mean.” your words are teasing, a snarl that curls your mouth up. Deku stutters, eyes going wide, jaw snapping shut in surprise as he tries to think back on how rude he just sounded.

“No, I’m not—I mean, you wouldn’t stop and I just—there’s a lot on my plate right now—and you just—you keep on—I’m not—I’m not mean.” He’s sputtering, hands all over the place, the glasses perched on the bridge of his nose falling even lower with how he jabbers on and on. it’s endearing really, to see how he tries to upkeep his image of being so kind and understanding, even though his nostrils just flared at you. and his eyebrows turned down and he gritted at you, his hands were balled into fists, his words were so nasty, so ugly, so unbecoming for Deku.

you liked it. loved it even—vowed to get him like this every single fucking second that you could.

you pick and poke at him whenever you see him, teasing him and pulling at him. pushing him around even though the hero is so much stronger than you, so much bigger. and he lets you, tries to defend himself but—that’s not what you want. you want the ugliness, the snark, the mean.

he snaps, eventually, when you least expect it. grabs you up in black whip when you go to push him against the wall for the third time in only a minute, his eyes suddenly dark, the aura of the room suddenly charged.

“That’s what I was looking for.” you whisper to him, the grin spreading your face quickly dissipating in only seconds when you become the prey. when you become the one pushed up against the wall with teeth at your neck, a hand in your underwear, bullying your hole with too thick fingers.

“Why do you want me to act like this? Be so mean to you, huh?” he sounds so frustrated with himself, with you, growling and nipping and licking when you don’t answer quick enough. but your breath is caught in your lungs because finally—finally, did you get what you wanted. it just took a little bit of pushing, you suppose.

[zecoritheweirdone]

wanna preface this by saying that i am. So normal. anyway i just spent the last week redrawing scenes from mystery skulls animated but as that hermitcraft au i posted about a couple times. you guys should watch msa it is. so so good.

[millermouth]

joel miller x reader

silly little drabble for my boob job babes (redux and aug) from this thought || not quite smut but MDNI 18+, lots of titty grabbin' and gropin', no outbreak, little bit of dirty talk, would one call this findom? joel likes spending his money on you, ok im sorry there's 2 times we use daddy I can't help it, joel is a big BOY || a/n: this is so self indulgent but idgaf anyway do you guys remember in middle school how everyone would wear the I ❤️ boobies bracelets lmao wk: under 1k

Chin hooked over your shoulder and thick arms roped tight around your waist, there was something about him that made felt so fucking small. And that was because Joel Miller was just a man in every sense. Broad and solid, hairy and warm, always smelling faintly of sweat and Irish Spring. That clean, masculine musk had you trained like Pavlov’s dog, drooling for him the second he got close.

“Fuckin’ love these,” he murmured, voice graveled with sleep as his hands came up over your Miller Contracting sleep shirt—one of his—squeezing through the soft fabric. Your hips pushed into the counter, hands sudsy from the dishes you’d put off the night before. Not your fault—Joel had gotten home late, and all you’d wanted was to climb him like a damn tree.

His palms were so big he could take up all of you, fingers spanning your chest and pushing your breasts together with a groan. You let your head fall back against his shoulder, exposing your neck to the sunlight spilling through the window. His lips found your throat, tongue flicking before he bit down on your sensitive flesh.

“J-Joel,” you whimpered.

“Remind me,” he said low, dragging your shirt up and holding it in place with one of his forearms across your collar bone, his hands now on your bare skin. All rough, calloused, and greedy as he went on: “how much these cost us again?” His thumbs swept over your peaked flesh, voice dropping even deeper. “How much of daddy's money went into makin’ you even more perfect for me, huh?”

“Ten—oh!” you gasped as he pinched your nipples hard, just how you needed. He knew the nerves weren’t the same after surgery, knew how to twist and tug to make the sensation spike up your spine. “Fuck—ten grand, daddy.”

He groaned, exhaling a bullish breath against your neck, then spun you around in one smooth motion. His hands slid beneath your thighs and lifted you, your legs wrapping around his torso on instinct. He held you there, strong arms locked just under your ass, holding you steady with your chest right at his mouth.

You pulled your shirt up for him, one hand anchoring in his hair as he leaned in, lips already dragging over your skin, tongue lapping between your breasts before his mouth latched on.

“Worth every fuckin’ penny,” he growled, pulling onto one nipple, sucking deep. You gasped, then laughed breathlessly as he kissed them, mouth hot and wet on your skin.

You moaned, voice light and aching as he licked along your scars and closed his mouth around the other. His jaw opened wide, nearly swallowing the whole globe, groaning as he sucked greedily.

“Joel—oh, fuck—” you hiccuped, staring down at him, your jaw slack. His lashes fluttered over high cheekbones, the heavy purple under his eyes from long days and no sleep. The morning light cast a pale halo across his face and you felt like were falling in love all over again. He was just so fucking handsome.

Then you felt him starting to move, making his way across the kitchen. You ducked instinctively as he carried you through the doorway, the ceiling fan just above.

“You’re gonna kill me!” you squealed.

“Quit it,” he chuckled, smacking your ass as he adjusted his grip. Your sleep shirt rode up, cheeky panties on full display, “would never put my baby in danger,”

“Where are you taking me?” you asked, twisting to look behind you.

“To finish what I started. Ain’t leavin’ this house ‘til I’ve had my fill,” he muttered, carrying you toward the bedroom.

His mouth immediately found your chest again as the back of his knees hit the mattress, dropping down onto it with you still wrapped around him. He sealed his lips greedily around one of your breasts, purple and red marks already forming, and you couldn’t help the giggle that spilled out.

He pulled back with a pop, cocking an eyebrow with a cheeky grin, “What’s so funny?”

“You,” you whispered, pressing a kiss to his nose.

He hummed, finally pulling your shirt off and tossing it to the floor. Then he paused, eyes black with lust, but beneath it something was different, suddenly serious.

“You know I loved ‘em before too, right?” he said quietly. “Loved you before. I’d love you either way.”

“I know, big guy,” you murmured, fingers carding through his silver streaked hair. Then you shifted, sitting up and lowering yourself onto his lap, over the thick line of him through his briefs. His breath stuttered.

“But… you like them now, don't you?” you asked softly, running your fingers up your stomach, then over your breasts, teasing as you ground your hips just slightly. You cupped them, one in each hand, letting them jiggle a little.

“You think they’re pretty now, right?”

Joel propped himself up on his elbows, eyes locked on yours like he was seconds from devouring you whole. “So fuckin’ pretty, baby,” he said, voice cracking with lust. “You’re so goddamn beautiful it makes me feel insane,”

He reached up and gently tugged your hands away, replacing them with his own.

“I’ll take it from here.”

You laughed again, wrapping your arms around his neck and leaning into his touch as he lay back again, pulling you down with him.

Im actually so fucking obsessed w this man I need to be put in an institution

[ardienothesieno]

taking notes on the hermitcraft charity livestream for my friend @pookapufferfish and also just anyone else who had to miss it 👍

these are going to be all over the place lol

i started my note-keeping like an hour or so into the stream so i dont have a lot of stuff from the beginning...

but: grian and scar opened the stream, showed off some of the items up for auction (like real wild life snails. i want one so bad but they're MASSIVELY out of my price range...)

POST-POSTING EDIT: I FORGOT THERE WAS AN IMP AND SKIZZ PODCAST. it wasnt really a traditional podcast though, martyn was asking them questions, a group of hermits would vote on who they thought had the best answer, and whoever lost got shocked by grian.

my most notable takeaway from the shock-cast is that if impulse could have any superpowers he'd want control over time, and skizz would want the ability to heal people. mmm yes food for the superhero aus

and then ren busted out this custom hermitcraft guitar that's also up for auction and played a song by green day

and then we got treebark content.martyn and ren ran the main stream for like 20 minutes

also we hit ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS really freaking fast. and they spun the wheel of chaos and it landed on ✨hermit boxing✨

ROBO-CLEO

okay now all that follows is liveblogging

i keep recognizing people in chat. like not even from mcyt spaces ive seen like three people who i know from skurry streams

martyn using they/them for cleo pog!!

THERE'S A JELLIE MURAL IN THE MINECRAFT OFFICE AWWW

irl guess the build / drawing... drawing things on whiteboards or building things and then guessing

cub is wearing a bob ross wig.

jimmy has built skizz's giraffe...

SKIZZ GIRAFFE REDEMPTION ARC GOES HORRIBLY WRONG

pearl has gorgeous handwriting

grian has obtained a cat keyboard and jimmy is beatboxing along

GEM GIRAFFE REDEMPTION ARC GOES INCREDIBLY RIGHT

they're gonna auction off the terrible drawings. i want one.

round two of guess the drawing / build has the most unhinged prompts ever. including the cursed creature mumbo built in the last permitmaster

it has gone off the rails incredibly fast

grian is just torturing everyone with nerf guns and whoopie cushions

jimmy is left handed

martyn's doing a dollar drive and it's not letting me donate because it doesnt take debit cards. now i need to somehow convince my dad to let me use his credit card... i'll pay him back but. gah. the hassle.

pearl and some person fighting in the background (who was apparently karn, her partner!)

TWO HUNDRED THOUSANDDDDDDDDDDDDD

joe and cub are boxing!! cub is still dressed like bob ross

it's been like 20 minutes and martyn is still going strong with the name reading. and about 30,000 dollars have been raised in that time alone

dimension 20 reference!

martyn's free from yelling names for now... in half an hour we raised SEVENTY THOUSAND DOLLARS

zed and tango hosting the QUIET GAMESSSSSSS. 3 teams of two, imp and gem, ren and skizz, GRIAN AND JIMMYYYY. basically just a bunch of weird minigames where you have to be as quiet as possible. scored on how quiet you are and how well you do

first minigame is moving marbles with spoons but the spoons are attached to a cowbell

gem and impulse did good. skizz and ren did better then i expected. jimmy and grain instantly dissolved into anarchy. jimmy and grian had the most marbles, skizz and ren were surprisingly the quietest

okay the next game is so weird. knocking around ping pong balls with party popper blow kazoo things. but you hold the kazoo for your partner so it's weirdly intimate

someone in the chat described it as nightmare blunt rotation and that the most accurate description yet

someone else in chat has named skizz and ren team rizz and i hate everything

also i realize now that if theyd have done this with commonly shipped pairs the fandom would never shut up

despite the absolute chaos that was happening grian and jimmy won that round on both number of balls and quietness. grian may have slapped jimmy at one point. (he totally did)

the last one is EVEN MORE COMPLICATED. one person blindfolded navigating a minefield of bubblewrap and rubber chickens. another with jingle bells on their ankles and a big stick to smack their partner around.

gem immediately has grabbed the big stick with an evil look on her face

impulse is INCREDIBLY clumsy and gem is just whaling on him

"IT'S ALL BUBBLES!!!?!?" -- impulsesv

ren and skizz have a STRATEGY

ren is doing adorable little shuffley step-steps. "Robo-penguin Ren... Renguin" -- Zedaph

JIMMY IS MOUTHING "HELP ME" OMG.... GRIANS GOING TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM...

but theyve got the best strategy yet actually grian's only kinda beating the shit out of jimmy... they might win this...

GRIAN AND JIMMY TAKE THE WHOLE THING HOME!!!!!!!! SKYBLINGS VICTORY!!!!!!! THE ONE NO ONE EXPECTED!!!!!!

wheel spin for 200,000 landed on "tortilla slap challenge" whichll be weird

the artworks from guess the build have gone up on the auction site and scar is very horrified over something skizz drew... a "sentient sock" that looks very... sus.

speed TCG time!!!!!!! i dont know much about TCG so im gonna try and maybe try and study a bit during this part (also also every 1000 dollars donated each player gets an extra item card)

joe is doing live TCG sound effects

neither joe or ren cant flip a coin to save their lives

pearl v cub. ren v joe. ren v cub.

TCG IS TOO CHAOTIC I CANT FOCUS ON TRIGONOMETRY LIKE THIS

also i need to learn how to play this it looks so fun

this is HEATED. and ren keeps getting armor stands and is so pissed about it

REN TAKES THE VICTORY!!! and they raised like 20,000 dollars in the process holy cow "THIS IS THE MOST EXPENSIVE GAME OF TCG EVER TO BE PLAYED" -- Joe Hills

ONE MILLION DOLLARS RAISED FOR GAMERS OUTREACH IN TOTAL

THREE HUNDRED THOUSANDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

300k wheel spin has unlocked NERF GUNSSSSS

also it's "donate x amount of dollars get your name on a sign on hermitcraft" time

cleobot is back!

scar is having a fantastic time running the main stream

GRIAN HAS COME IN AND BARRAGED SCAR WITH BULLETS.

it's tortilla tiiiiiiiiiiime

twich has a personal vendetta against me. it gives me ads right when the exciting things are starting.

scar is apparently on the board of directors at gamer's outreach now!!

IMPULSE V JIMMY. a draw. they are both invulnerable to tortillas.

TANGO V ZED. tango loses through laughter

IMPULSE V ZED. zed didnt get a single slap on impulse. a draw.

also all the hermits really really like to play scissors. in rock paper scissors.

"she removed both of my heads from my body..." -- RentheDog

THE GIRLIES ARE FIGHTING (ren and false)

SKIZZ V GRIAN TORTILLA FIGHT. skizz wins lolol

...im buying a sign

gem signed pearl's ankle.

OKAY I GOT REALLY DISTRACTED FROM MY LIVEBLOGGING. THERE WAS WAR. THERE WAS A MASSIVE NERF GUN WAR. IT INTERRUPTED THE SIGN PLACING.

and yeah... i bought a sign <3

but i dont even know how to cover the half of the nerf war. but there was a lot of hotguy and cuteguy action

grian was even using two pistols instead of a bigger nerf gun... just like cuteguy in ddvau... omg...

at one point scar became a tank. and jimmy wheeled him behind enemy lines and he sniped four people and won the round

and theyre starting to wrap up now, martyn's doing another dollar drive. we're at $375,000...

everyone is signing the pc in the background of martyn's mad line-spitting

TEN HOUR MARK

we need 10,000 dollars... then we'll hit 400k and martyn can rest his vocal cords...

SPARKBIRD GOT MENTIONED

since it's been brought up like 13 times on the stream today. hey. you. you, the person reading this. you just lost the game :3

FOUR HUNDRED THOUSANDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

holy cow. that wraps up day one!!!!

im gonna reblog this post in a bit with all the screenshots i took. because i took a lot of them lol.

link to my day two liveblog

[i-may-be-an-emu]

all of the rest of the sfth boys and KBF all making cute lil hearts and then there’s Sam with his circle

[heartorbit]

i want to know everything that makes you happy! 💫🪐🎇

[dandp]

Final Incophearent Update

This post includes all previously promised info, including pictures, the PDF of the cards, and the reaction from Dan and Phil! (under a cut bc there's a lot)

Dan and Phil's reaction:

The deck was successfully gifted to them by @mothmanbussy420! Here's the clip and transcript of them receiving it (with a very promising initial reaction from Dan 👀):

Mint: This is a Dan and Phil-themed set of Incohearent cards —

Dan: Oh fuck yeah.

Phil: Wow!

Mint: — that a bunch of - like 50 people online submitted to.

Dan: Oh great, that's a Youtube video right there.

Phil: That's incredible (?)

Getting a Deck For Yourself:

This Google Drive includes a spreadsheet of all the info on the cards, as well as a PDF file that can be printed at home and all the additional files/instructions needed if you want to get a deck professionally printed. Hope you enjoy!

Pictures of the Deck:

Massive shoutout to @mothmanbussy420 who took the pictures and put together the Google Drive; they are the real MVP of this post. I also wanted to shout out one more time my other fellow project mods @fletthewreck @steveandscraggy and everyone else who submitted to the deck; it's been so fun to work on this and see everything come together and I hope everyone's as happy with the final product as I am!