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ticklishhpickle · 8 years ago

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Howell the Grinch Stole Christmas

Summary: Eight years ago, after an incident he'd rather not discuss, Dan Howell ran away to a mountain north of Memeville to become the Grinch. He had never succeeded before, but this year, Dan was determined to steal Christmas, and he didn't care what Santa thought about it.

ft. Santa!Phil and Grinch!Dan

(technically a friends to enemies to lovers fic)

Warnings: homophobia

Word count: 6.9k

Read it on AO3: http://archiveofourown.org/works/13142010

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It was the night before Christmas Eve, and Santa was more stressed than a student completing their year 12 exams. His elves were working their tiny butts off, making about five toys per minute each. This was was a new record for them. Santa himself was perched on a stool at the head of the table, his long legs swinging back and forth anxiously.

Contrary to popular belief, Santa was not an overweight, white-haired 60-year old man. He was actually a considerably lanky 25 year old guy with black hair and an obsession with Buffy. And Santa wasn’t even his real name. It was Phil. At the ripe old age of 18, Phil was chosen to be the next Santa Claus. You could imagine 18-year old Phil Lester’s surprise when the previous Santa Claus stumbled down his chimney, not to deliver presents but to invite Phil to dedicate his life to delivering presents to the children of Memeville, raising and taking care of hundreds of elves, and most importantly keeping levels of Christmas spirit high enough each year to keep Santa’s workshop in business. Of course, it had taken a lot of convincing on Santa’s part, but after being promised that he could return to his hometown to visit his parents whenever he wanted to, Phil gave in.

Seven years later and here Phil was, stressing over getting all the presents made and produced in time for Christmas Eve. “Not to rush you guys but we’ve still got 5000 presents to make and wrap, and Christmas Eve is tomorrow!!! But you’re all doing really well guys, good job!” Phil informed his workers panickedly.

He really did feel bad rushing them so much, they worked so hard all year, and especially this night. They deserve a big reward, Phil thought, maybe a bulk order of candy canes and maple syrup?

Phil’s hands were fidgeting nervously in his lap.He was eager to help them wrap all the gifts, but after breaking his fifth toy train by accident, the main elves decided it was best for him to just ‘supervise’ the production line. Phil was probably the clumsiest person ever, which is what he warned the administrators of the Memeville Christmas precinct when they chose him. They had dismissed his warning hastily however, telling him he had the highest level of Christmas spirit out of anyone else in Memeville, perhaps even the world, not to mention the purest heart. Phil didn’t complete agree with the latter part, but he couldn’t fight the fact that he was almost unhealthily obsessed with Christmas.

The fact that there was a Santa and a workshop to go along with him for each city of the world still astounded Phil, but he guessed it made sense. It was already impossible enough delivering presents to every child in Memeville in one night, he couldn’t imagine doing it for every child in the world.

Sitting on the stool doing nothing but supervising the poor elves, his mind wandered to a problem even bigger than getting the gifts made in time. A gift-stealing, Christmas-ruining problem that went by the name of ‘The Grinch’.

Every year without fail, the Grinch would sneak into houses dressed as Santa himself, and pluck the presents from under the trees. Phil and his elves worked so damn hard the whole year, just to have thousands of their presents stolen. Kids would wake up on Christmas morning and run under the Christmas tree in excitement, only to find no present from Santa under the tree, being left to assume that Santa forgot about them that year.

The most frustrating part of the whole thing was that Phil and his elves were never been able to catch the Grinch, despite knowing exactly where the villain lived. Phil couldn’t count the number of times he and his elves had gone to Mount Placenta, the mountain they had traced the Grinch’s footsteps back to. But every damn time they would be kicked off the mountain, whether it be by a herd of rogue llamas, a giant catapult or a group of hungry mountain lions. It varied from year to year.

The year before, Phil had barely raised enough Christmas spirit around the world to fill the spirit-o-meter up. The needle had teetered dangerously low on the meter, and to say that the big guys were disappointed in Phil would be an understatement. He nearly lost his job. This is why this year, Phil was determined to catch Mr. Grinch in all his glory. Phil was going to take back Christmas.

Phil lay awake in bed that night, staring up at the ceiling. It must be Christmas Eve by now, Phil thought. Surely midnight has passed. While Phil was stressed every Christmas Eve, he had never lost sleep over it. But this year was different. If he didn’t deliver, and make sure not enough gifts were stolen this year, he would lose his job! His job was everything to him, and while it wasn’t the most conventional job out there, and a far cry of what he originally had wanted to be (a weatherman), it gave him so much fulfillment. His elves were like his own kids, and his reindeer were basically just oversized, clumsy puppies.

After what felt like forever, Phil pried his mind off the topic of the Grinch, and distracted himself with happier things. He thought about his parents, and how gobsmacked they were when he first told them about his new job, but how proud they were of him now. He thought about how much it would cost to order a few thousand candy canes for his elves, and how happy they would be once he gave them the sugary treats. His mind wandered over many trivial topics of the like, and eventually he started thinking about high school.

High school felt like an eternity ago for Phil, but it had only been about six years since he’d been there. Phil had actually enjoyed high school, unlike a lot of people. He was very well-liked, which was unsurprising due to his sweet nature and friendliness towards everyone. Phil felt cocky for even thinking about it, but a lot of girls did fawn over him in his teenage years. He couldn’t count the number of girls who had confessed to him or asked him on a date, only to be rejected. Of course, he always felt bad saying no to girls who had gotten their hopes up, but Phil wasn’t really interested in any girls, at all. He only had eyes for one boy.

His name was Dan Howell, and Phil thought he was the cutest thing. Always shy and blushing, he barely spoke to most of his cohort but Phil prided himself in being one of the very few people that Dan would have regular conversations with. Everyone saw Dan for what he appeared to be; cold, antisocial and rude. But Phil saw Dan for what he actually was; funny, clever and having the kindest heart he knew. He had short brown hair and a fringe swept to the side, from what Phil remembered. And the warmest, brownest eyes. Phil could never forget those eyes. The two weren’t even that close, which is why Phil never confessed to Dan. He wasn’t even sure if Dan liked boys too! It’s a shame. Phil thought gloomily. I never got to say goodbye.

Phil was sick with the flu for the last week of year eleven, so missed the end of term. When Phil came back the next year, Dan was gone. Phil heard he moved schools or something, but wouldn’t Dan have at least told him if he was moving? They were friends, after all. Phil was probably his only friend.

Phil fell asleep soon after, his dreams filling with soft brown eyes and curly hair.

Dan Howell’s heart was two sizes too small. It hadn’t always been that way, at least he thought that was the case. But he was fine with having a heart too small. A heart any larger would surely distract him from his main task; stealing all the presents in Memeville from right under the children and Santa’s noses. Sure, in previous years he had stolen a good few thousand presents and Christmas feast items, but nowhere near enough to really destroy the shitty holiday.

He hadn’t always been like this. In fact, he used to love Christmas. Dan used to be so full of joy and life, until it happened. He liked to think he was a pretty nice kid, he wasn’t exactly the most outgoing person but he wasn’t mean to anyone. Yet some people just thought it was so funny to- Dan’s thoughts were venturing into a bad place, he couldn’t think about that. Not right now. He had grinching to focus on.

It used to be easier. A few years ago, when he first started ‘grinching’ as he liked to call it, plucking enough presents from the homes of innocent civilians to kill the Christmas spirit was easy. Dan would slither under tree after tree, swiping present after present and get by scott free. But after a year this had all changed.

Santa must have gotten new wheels, or fitter, or something because suddenly Dan was finding it a lot harder to steal all the presents in time. There were just so many compared to his first year as Grinch! Perhaps Santa had gotten sick of his thievery and was taking matters into his own hands, combatting the taking with more giving. It made Dan sick.

Dan trudged purposefully over to his scrappy old ‘sleigh’, pulling his Santa hat onto his head on the way.

“Tabitha!” he yelled out. Almost instantaneously, his loyal pet llama came galloping over. Her fur was a bit matted, for lack of care on Dan’s part, but other than that she was a considerably healthy animal. It probably was the excessive training Dan put her through all year, just so she would be fit enough to pull all six feet of him and his sleigh across town every year. Dan climbed onto his sleigh, pulled on the reigns and kicked his feet back. Dan was going to steal Christmas.

“Lester?” The form teacher called out, the boredom obvious in his voice. Dan’s heart sunk when silence followed. He had really hoped that Phil would have made it for the last day of school. Dan was counting on it! He had stayed up all night making the perfect Christmas gift for him, and writing the card as well. He shouldn’t have expected Phil to come, he was really sick after all.

In period one Dan was sitting alone, as usual. The room was surprisingly silent, especially considering it was the last day of school and that the teacher had left the room for a bathroom break. He held the hand-sewn lion plushie he had made for Phil in his hands, and the card as well. He frowned. At least now he wouldn’t have to put up with the rejection that would be inevitable after Phil read the card. What was he thinking, confessing his feelings for Phil via Christmas card? He was just too pussy to say it to Phil’s face.

It’s not like Phil would be surprised, either. Dan thought he was always really obvious with his crush on Phil. He was always a blushing mess whenever Phil so much as touched his hand, or complimented his hair. Plus Phil was the only person Dan really talked to in the entire school, it’s not like he would have a crush on anyone else.

He remembered the first time Phil spoke to him. It was the first day of year nine, and Dan was sitting alone under the oak tree in the courtyard. Dan was glancing shyly over at Phil, admiring his sharp features and silky black hair. Phil had looked over, brown eyes meeting blue and Dan had blushed profusely, embarrassed his crush had caught him staring. The next thing he knew, Phil was walking over to him, and Dan braced himself for the worst. What he wasn’t expecting was for Phil to say a simple “Hello” and plop himself down next to Dan, and to then strike up a conversation about the creative masterpiece that was Buffy. From then on, Phil had started greeting Dan in the hallways, ignoring his friends’ looks of disapproval whenever he did. He also continued making conversation with Dan whenever he could, which is more than he could say for anyone else in the school. Phil treated him like a person, while everyone else treated him like a freak.

Dan stroked the lion plushie in his hands, smiling fondly at the memory. If only he could make Phil like him back, he mused. His smile immediately fell when he heard the voice he had grown to hate over the years.

“What’s that, gaylord?” Liam sneered, shoving Dan on the back roughly. Dan remained silent, figuring that if he ignored him long enough, he would just leave him alone. After a few seconds, he was met with another shove, this time rougher.

“Please leave me alone.” Dan said as calmly as he could manage. Liam was the one he hated the most out of everyone in the stupid school.

Liam smirked, his hand quickly shooting out to grab the plushie and the card from Dan’s lap before Dan could react.

“Give that back!” Dan whispered in exasperation. Liam couldn’t read the contents of the card!

Dan reached his arms out in an attempt to steal his card back, but it was too late. Liam had already opened the card, his beady eyes scanning eagerly across the words. Dan was done for. Dan looked at Liam, begging him with his eyes to just give the card back and forget about what he read. Liam simply sniggered at him.

“HEY EVERYONE!” about two dozen heads snapped in his direction. “Since Christmas is just around the corner, I thought I, being the selfless man I am, would give you all an early present!” Liam cleared his throat.

“As we all know, Mr. Daniel Howell here, is a loner. Not a single friend in this school.” Dan’s palms were sweating now. He was fucked, and not in a good way.

“I think we can all agree that no one would even like Daniel as a friend, let alone… a lover! Yet he came here to school today, hoping to see Phil and give him this card. Let me read it out for you.” Liam looked Dan directly in the eyes, relishing in the pure fear he saw in them.

“Dear Phil,” the boy started in the most over-the-top, lovey dovey voice he could muster, “ ‘Merry Christmas! You’re the kindest person I know, and to be honest, my only friend in this school. ‘ Awww, how sweet! His only friend! How SURPRISING! ‘La di da di da, a few paragraphs on how much Phil means to him, and now we get to the good stuff.”

Dan’s eyes were watering at this point, he knew what was coming next.

“ ‘So I guess what I’m saying Phil is, I like you. And I’m sorry that I didn’t have the guts to say this to you in real life but, will you go on a date with me? ‘ “ At this, the whole class burst out laughing.

“How cute! The little queer thinks that someone would actually go on a date with him, especially Phil Lester! What a joke!” Liam was laughing the loudest, and the most cruelly out of the whole class.

Dan felt his head spinning, the cackles of his classmates resounding in his ears. This couldn’t be real.

“I mean, we all knew Dan was loopy, but to think! He’s a little faggot as well!” Liam snorted, and then proceeded to take his scissors out of his pencil case, and cut the lion Dan had slaved over for hours into tiny little pieces.

That did it. Dan no longer just felt humiliated and distraught. Now he was angry. Really, really angry. He felt the white hot anger pulse through his veins, his fists clenching and his nostrils flaring. Dan didn’t think he had ever felt this way before. Every single time he had been taunted, or teased, or pushed over in the past few years, he had never felt like this.

Dan grabbed the chair Liam was standing on out from under him, causing the bully to fall on his bum. He forcefully through it towards the window, smashing it instantly. He picked up another chair, throwing it towards Liam’s stupid, stupid head, wiping the ugly smirk right off his face.

Liam quickly ducked, avoiding any injury, but dropping the mangled bits of lion toy and the card to the ground. That’s all Dan had wanted. He quickly grabbed the remnants of the plushie and the card and bolted out of the classroom, one mantra repeating in his head. If Christmas was ruined for him, it was going to be ruined for everyone.

“Santa! Santa!”

Phil felt his body being shaken by tiny, tiny hands. Was it time to get up?

“It’s Christmas Eve! We need to get going now, or we won’t deliver all the presents in time!” the small voice squeaked out again.

Phil’s eyes shot open, taking in Dil, Phil’s head (and favourite) elf. His small hat was screwed firmly on his shiny forehead, and his glasses were nearly falling off his face. “Oh dear, thanks for waking me, Dil.” Phil said, pulling on his Santa suit at record speed. He really needed to stop sleeping in.

Within two minutes, Phil was fully dressed and ready to go, all the presents he needed stocked in the back of his sleigh.

“You ready Rudolph?” Phil asked gently, smiling at his reindeer. Rudolph grunted in acknowledgment.

“And you, Dasher?” Dasher whinnied excitedly.

“And you, Pr-” Phil was cut off by Dil.

“As lovely as I think it is that you ask each and every one of your reindeer if they’re ready to go, we don’t have time for that, Santa. You’ve got tens of thousands of presents to deliver and a grinch to beat.” His voice was authoritative, despite the fact that technically Phil was his boss. The way he treated Phil was like a sim telling its creator what to do, yet somehow it worked for them.

“Oh! Right, sorry I got a bit carried away! I’ll go now.” Phil giggled in embarrassment, his tongue poking out of his teeth a little. He looked back at all his elves waving at him, and at the presents stocked in his sleigh. He was ready to beat the Grinch.

Phil placed the beautifully wrapped toy truck under the even more beautifully decorated tree. Phil was always astounded at the efforts some families went to to make their houses look festive. This house was a stand out for sure, the tree adorned in intricate glass baubles. In addition, the baubles were engraved with different Christmas related things, ranging from a simple Christmas tree to the full nativity scene. These must have cost at least one dollar. The night was halfway over, and surprisingly, Phil was keeping up to schedule and had delivered just over half of the presents he needed to. This house marked the halfway point for him, which is why he was allowing himself to indulge in the intricacies of the house’s decor. Totally not like he wouldn’t have spent ages looking at this house anyway.

Phil was admiring a particularly detailed bauble, when he heard the soft footsteps of someone coming up from behind the corner. Phil contemplated hiding himself, but decided against it. It would be worth it, meeting one of the kids who still believed in him, even if it would set him back a few minutes.

His jaw practically fell to the floor when the footsteps stopped, and instead the brown eyes and brown curls he had been thinking about mere hours ago were standing in front of him. Phil shook his head, surely this couldn’t be real?

“Dan? Is that you?”

Phil was surprised he even managed to get those four words out. The boy-no, man in front of him nodded after a moment.

“Y-yeah it is.” Phil’s eyes watered as he swiftly pulled Dan in for a hug, smelling the top of his head. Okay, usually Phil wasn’t this creepy, but this was Dan! The guy he’d had a crush on since year nine, probably before that. And he was all grown up! Dan squeezed Phil back in his arms eagerly, basking in Phil’s warmth.

“I’ve missed you.” Phil whispered softly. His voice was so sweet still, just the way Phil remembered it to be. And his eyes, still so warm. Phil was not surprised he had a crush on him back in the day. Hell, he was still attracted to him now. This was insane! Phil had so many questions for the boy. Where did he go after year eleven? What was he doing now? What was he doing dressed in a cheaply made Santa suit, holding the gifts Phil had just placed under the tree in his hands? Wait. That couldn’t be right. The only two possible reasons for this would be that either:

Dan was Santa

Dan was the Grinch

Well, Phil knew for a fact Dan couldn’t possibly be Santa, since Phil was, and had been Santa for the past six years. And he knew the Grinch dressed up as Santa in order to continue his thievery if any children happened to wake up while he was at it, thanks to Dil’s extensive research. Phil froze up in their embrace, then took a step back. Well this was a bit of a pickle.

Dan’s face fell as soon as Phil stepped back, and Phil felt his heart clench a little. No Phil! He scolded himself. You can’t feel sorry for him, he’s the Grinch, remember?

“Um, Dan. You wouldn’t, possibly happen to be the Grinch, aha. Would you?” Phil asked, already knowing the answer, but not wanting it confirmed. Man, this was beginning to seem like the worst Christmas ever.

Dan’s eyes widened, which Phil definitely did not think was very cute. Because he was the Grinch, and Phil knew that and so could not think such things about his enemy.

“Well this is awkward.” Dan said, almost too casually, confusing Phil. The next thing he knew, Dan was shoving the meticulously decorated Christmas tree into his sack, making no effort to preserve the baubles hanging on it. “YOU ARE!” Phil was furious, but most of all, so, so disappointed. He really thought Dan was a good person. Clearly he changed.

Phil lunged at Dan, knocking him onto the ground and pinned him down. “NO! Why are you doing this, Dan? What happened to you?” Dan snarled and flipped them over, tying Phil’s arms to the piano next to them with a strong piece of rope. He quickly scrambled to his feet and running over to the other side of the room.

“What happened to me?” Dan laughed, but there was no richness to his laugh like it was years ago. It was just hollow.

“As if you didn’t hear, Phil. Don’t play dumb with me.”

Phil was genuinely confused. He evidently didn’t hear about whatever Dan was referencing, or he would understand. All anyone ever told him about Dan was that he moved out of town and never contacted anyone from their school again. Phil was beginning to think there was more to it.

“I seriously don’t know what you’re talking about Dan! Last I heard about you was that you moved towns, something to do with your parents’ work or something. What is it?!?” Phil knew his voice oozed with genuine confusion, he only hoped Dan would recognise that and tell him what happened.

Dan shoved another few presents in his sack. He looked at Phil’s face, noticing the real confusion on it and the scowl on Dan’s face softened.

“Well, maybe you didn’t hear. I’ll tell you. That last week when you were sick from school, remember that?” Phil nodded.

“I made you a, um, a Christmas gift of some sort. That I spent a long time making. And I wrote a card as well, that had a confession of my l- appreciation for our friendship in it. And Liam Turner read it out to the whole class, and destroyed the present I spent so many hours making.”

Phil wanted to coo a little upon hearing that Dan spent hours making a Christmas gift for him. Did that make Phil crazy? He was literally tied to a piano because of Dan, not to mention Dan was his enemy by default now that Phil knew he was the Grinch.

But besides that feeling, Phil was disgusted. How could Liam be so cruel? Phil never liked Liam either, he was the school’s biggest bully and grade-A douchebag, but he never expected him to do something as low as that. He knew Dan wasn’t exactly the most well-liked person in the school, but that was everyone else’s fault, and not Dan’s. Phil didn’t really know how to respond to this. Luckily he didn’t need to, as Dan continued.

“So that’s the day I decided that, if Christmas was ruined for me, I would ruin it for everybody.” Dan sounded like he was going to cry, his voice all wobbly and thick. Phil just wanted to run over and give him a hug, but he was still tied down to the piano.

“I-I’m sorry, Dan.” Phil cursed himself for being unable to think of anything better to say. But it was how he truly felt. Dan just scowled again,any signs of vulnerability from before disappearing in a flash. “Yeah, well it’s old news now. And as fun as this has been,” he heaved his sack full of stolen goods onto his sleigh, “I’ve gotta take off.” Phil watched Dan climb onto the sleigh, and he knew he couldn’t leave it like this.

“Wait!” The brown-haired boy slowly turned around, his eyes looking dead and hopeless.

“What, Phil?”

Phil cleared his throat for what would probably be the most important speech he was ever going to say in his life. He better not stuff it up.

“You don’t have to do this, you know. I know you’re better than this. The Dan Howell I knew was the sweetest, kindest person I knew. Better than anyone else in that crappy school. Certainly better than Liam.” Phil glanced up at Dan. His face had softened a little. This was working.

“You had the biggest heart I knew as well. You know, when I was chosen to be Santa they said I had the kindest heart out of anyone in this town. But I told them they were wrong. You did.” Dan was walking over towards Phil now, looking very hesitant. It reminded Phil of how tentative Dan looked back in the day, when they first started talking.

Phil was full on bawling at this point, and when Dan sat down next to him, he realised he was too. Dan shook his head bitterly.

“Not anymore. My heart is two sizes too small now.”

Phil’s brow creased in disappointment. So it was true. He had heard from Dil and all the other elves that the Grinch had a heart two sizes too small, but he never thought it was possible. Yet here he was, being told by the one and only Grinch that it was true.

Phil saw another tear slide down Dan’s cheek. He reached up and tenderly stroked it away.

“But it can grow, you know. I know it can.”

Dan glanced down at Phil’s hand, the gentle touch catching him off guard.

He said nothing, and after a moment Phil felt the ropes around his arms being untied. Dan stood up and walked back to his sleigh, pushing the stolen sack of presents and Christmas decorations back off it.

“I’m sorry for all I’ve put you through Phil. I really am.” And with that, Dan Howell disappeared into the night, leaving Phil behind once again.

About a billion questions were running through Phil’s mind. Where did Dan go? Did he leave to finish stealing the rest of the presents? Why did Phil still find him so cute after all these years? And, most important of all, why was Liam such an asshole about the present and the card? There was no reason for him to humiliate Dan over a simple Christmas card for a friend. There was something Dan hadn’t told him about the card. This wasn’t adding up.

After his encounter with Dan, Phil was left in utter shock. It took him a few minutes to collect himself, before he finally continued on his journey through town. For the remainder of the night, Phil was forced to push any worries about the brown-haired boy to the back of his mind. His main task for the night was to get every present delivered, leaving no child unhappy.

But now, on his way back to the workshop, Phil was left alone with just the sound of the wind rushing past him, and the soft gallop of his reindeer and his thoughts. He really hoped Dan hadn’t gone back out to undo all of Phil’s work. Surely Dan wouldn’t be so cruel as to do that, after finding out Phil was Santa. He wished he could say this was certain, but Phil didn’t really know Dan anymore. It had been years. Phil knew he had kept his own core personality throughout the entirety of his life. He had always been a friendly, kind boy who wanted the best for others. Dan was the same in high school. But it seemed like after that incident with Liam he had changed for the worse. Phil’s only hope was that the real Dan, his Dan was still in there somewhere. If he wasn’t, Phil didn’t want to know.

“Santa! Santa! You’ve done so well! Come look at the spirit-o-meter and the TVs!” Phil was woken up once again by an overly chirpy Dil. Phil jumped out of bed and ran out of his room, nearly knocking Dil over in the process.

He was not prepared at all for the sight he saw when he entered headquarters. The spirit-o-meter was at an all time high, its bright red needle pointing to the label saying ‘FULLY FESTIVE’. Phil thought he could cry tears of joy.

He then looked over to one of the dozens of screens in the room. On it, he saw a little boy opening a large wrapped box under the tree. The small boy’s face lit up in pure joy when he found the handmade toy train set inside. Phil felt the warmth from the boy’s smile in his own body. He took a closer look at the train and frowned. Neither he or any of his elves had made that train this year. Phil would know, he checked off every single toy that went out each year. In fact, it actually looked just like the special train Dil had made two years ago, that had been stolen by the Grinch.

Phil’s mouth dropped open a little. Had the Grinch- no, Dan, had he not only refrained from stealing any more presents last night, but had he also returned some? Phil quickly glanced over to the next screen. He saw a teenage girl with bright blue eyes playing with a fully grown golden retriever, the dog licking her face excitedly. Phil knew for a fact that the girl, Jenny had asked for a golden retriever when she was eleven years old. Phil specifically recalled how hard it was to wrap an entire puppy kennel, with a puppy inside and deliver it in time for Jenny. But she deserved it, she was on the nice list every single year.

In wonder, Phil looked at the dozens of screens filling the headquarters. In nearly every screen he looked at, there was a child running over to their mum or dad to show them a gift they’d been given years ago, or a couple embracing, or a grandma laughing at the antics her crazy grandkids were getting up to.

This was what Christmas was really about. While the presents were an important part of Christmas, they were only there to bring families closer together, which is what really mattered. And it seemed like all the presents Dan had returned just helped families act like families even more this year.

Phil wiped a single tear he had shed out of pure joy from his cheek, just basking in the moment. .This was the happiest he had felt in years. This made every ounce of stress Phil had experienced over the years worth it, every paper cut from handling wrapper paper worth it, every piece or reindeer poop he’d picked up off a civilian’s front lawn worth it.

The black-haired man was only snapped out of the moment when Dil came rushing in, his little feet pattering on the linoleum floor. “Sorry to end your moment, but I found a package for someone named Phil Lester? Did we forget to deliver one of the presents?” Dil asked, the stress evident in his tone.

What? Who would have a package for Phil? The only people he kept in contact with were his parents, and they always gave him their presents when he visited them in January.

“Phil Lester… that’s my real name. The one I had before I came here. We didn’t forget to deliver any presents, someone must have sent something to me.” Phil replied, his eyes wide.

“Oh. Must be from your parents then, I guess.” Dil replied, handing the package over to Phil. “I best get going then, the other elves and I are celebrating in the workshop with maple syrup shots. You’re welcome to join when you’re done here.”

Phil nodded at Dil, forcing a small smile. “Thanks Dil, go have fun.” he said. The little elf smiled back before scampering off, nearly tripping over his own feet several times.

When he was sure Dil was gone, Phil began unwrapping the brown paper. He beamed when he saw the little lion plushie inside, it was adorable! Phil hugged it to his chest, before noticing something strange about it. Why were there so many stitches on it? It looked like it had been destroyed and then… and then put back together. But it couldn’t be that, could it?

Phil examined the remaining item in the brown paper. It was a card with a drawing of an oak tree with two small boys laughing under it, with the words ‘Merry Christmas Phil’ written in bold cursive over it. It couldn’t be. The oak tree at their old school was where Dan and Phil had really talked for the first time, and the memory caused Phil’s heart to clench. With shaking hands, Phil opened the card, bracing himself for what was written inside.

Dear Phil,

Merry Christmas! You’re the kindest person I know, and to be honest, my only friend in this school. I hope you’re feeling better, it sucks that you’ve missed so much school :(

The day you came and sat with me under the oak tree was probably the best day of my life. You made me feel like a normal person, not like the freak everyone else acts like I am. If it wasn’t for you, I don’t know how I would have gotten this far. Thank you.

I have something to confess. Even before you talked to me, I had a… slight crush on you. And after we became friends, I guess it just grew. I really hoped it would go away, and I know you’re probably straight but my mum said I would regret it if I didn’t try.

So I guess what I’m saying Phil is, I like you. And I’m sorry that I didn’t have the guts to say this to you in real life but, will you go on a date with me?

Ps:

I really hope you like the lion plushie I made you. It took me a long time :D

Love,

Dan

Phil read the card at least five times. Everything was making sense now. This is why Liam had made fun of Dan so much that day- as well as being the biggest douchebag, he was a homophobe as well. Phil had not been oblivious to the way the bully would call Dan ‘gaylord’ and ‘faggot’ whenever he passed him in the halls. But even worse than this, Liam tried to coax Phil into bashing up his gay neighbour. Several times. Phil shivered when he thought about what Liam must have done to Dan when he read his card.

In addition to that, Dan had feelings for Phil, once upon a time. How did he not notice that Phil reciprocated his feelings? He thought he was so obvious with them! Phil’s brain was having trouble processing all this information at once, but it came to one conclusion. He needed to talk to Dan.

It cost Phil two bruised arms, a scratched knee and three hours to reach Dan’s house on Mount Placenta. Like every other time he had tried to get to the Grinch’s house, the herd of angry llamas was there. But by some miracle and hard work, Phil had fought past them.

Now, he was standing outside the one and only Grinch’s house, knocking hard on the wooden door. Phil anxiously waited as he heard the sound of Dan’s footsteps grow louder and louder.

The door swung open and Dan looked visibly relieved when he saw it was Phil on his doorstep, and not someone who had come to arrest him.

“Hi Dan, I got your present. Is it okay if I come in?” Phil asked.

“Yes, yes of course Phil,” Dan stepped out of the doorway to let Phil in. “I was hoping you’d come.” The young man looked so nervous and small. Phil just wanted to give him a big hug.

Phil followed him into a room with two couches and a coffee table. There were no decorations, and everything in the room was either black or grey. Dan sat down on one of the couches and patted the space next to him.

There was silence for a moment when Phil settled onto the couch, but it was soon broken by Phil.

“Well first of all, thank you for returning all those presents. You don’t know how much it means to me that you did that. I knew the old Dan was still in there somewhere.” Dan smiled at this, his dimple popping. Phil swooned a little before forcing himself to focus on what he was trying to say.

“It was only the right thing to do.”

“But you didn’t have to do it. And you did. Levels of Christmas spirit were off the charts this year!”

Dan chuckled a little and shook his head.

“Well it’s the least I could do after all these years of stealing Christmas. I’m so sorry for all the trouble I put you through. You didn’t deserve it. No one deserved it.” Dan’s voice was wavering, “Except Liam. Fuck that guy.”

So his old Dan still was here! As funny and sarcastic as he was back in the day, but still with a kind heart. Phil laughed at the last part of Dan’s apology.

“Actually Dan, that’s what I thought at first too. But it’s not really. Of course, the presents help raise Christmas spirit. It’s really about spending time with the ones you love, and being with family. So you were never really stealing Christmas. You were stealing presents, and as nice as they are, Christmas is family. Thank you for helping me realise that.”

What came next came as a shock to both men. Dan’s chest started pulsing, a pink glow radiating out of it. Phil heard a distinct pulsing, that was getting louder and louder by the second. The pink light filled the room, giving colour to the monochrome atmosphere.

Phil examined Dan’s chest more closely. It looked like something was growing in it. Could it be…? He peered a little closer, and saw a bright red heart growing rapidly in size.

“Dan! You’ve learnt the true meaning of Christmas and now, your heart, it’s growing!” Phil exclaimed.

“Well you think, I hadn’t, ungfh, fucking noticed that already?” Dan choked out between pants.

And just as quickly as it had started, Dan’s heart stopped growing. Phil was shocked, but amazed at what had just happened. He pulled the younger boy in for their second ever hug since high school, feeling the warmth radiating out of Dan’s chest.

Phil was so proud of the younger boy. He was no longer the Grinch, now he was his Dan. Phil pulled back from the hug and looked into Dan’s warm brown eyes. Would it be weird to ask him now? Actually, who cared. They had already lost seven years.

“How about that date?”

Dan’s eyes lit up, before he lifted his hand up to pull a stray hair off Phil’s fringe back in place.

“Only took you six years.” He quipped, before pulling the older man in for a kiss.

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