#got back home and crashed ALSKLS

[face-breaker]

what if i had detailed relationship pages for my mains —

[neverthesamelove]

2 Weeks Later

It was her first day out of bed after coming home with the twins.  She hadn’t really expected the kind of recovery she was going to have to go through after having a c- section birth. She had been mostly back to her old self a few days after having Viktoria…but with Axel and Ingrid…it was 2 weeks.

Magnus had been amazing, cooking and cleaning and taking care of everyone.  He would change the babies after they nursed and hold the one that was waiting for food or was too fussy to eat just yet.

They had help.  His mother came.  She cooked and took care of Viktoria and held the babies, but Rebecka sometimes thought it was more stressful for Magnus when she was there. She would see the look on his face when she corrected the amount of salt he put in a dish he was cooking, or the way he dressed the babies.  She was only trying to help, and it was just the way she was.

Rebecka’s mother and father had come to stay too, for a few days.  And that was another kind of stress.  They deferred everything to Magnus, though she remembered her mother walking Magnus into the bedroom after the babies were asleep and tucking him into bed and giving him a scolding finger when he tried to say something about the laundry needing to be done.  He had looked over at Rebecka and asked if she was feeling alright and when her hand moved to comb through his hair, he was already asleep.

The first two weeks were a blur.

But Rebecka was feeling better, less sore, and her wound was healing nicely.

So she was up and folding laundry with her sister who had come to stay for  2 days.  Stina was talking about the babies small clothes as she folded them, talking about how she remembered her girls wearing such small clothes, when suddenly it hit Rebecka.

She was holding one of his blue shirts, one he had had since before she met him.  It was in fine shape, it was a good quality shirt, but as she looked at it, tears filled her eyes.  Her hands tensed on the shoulders of the shirt as she held it up and she was nearly shaking when her sister looked up at her and stopped talking.

“Becka…what’s…are you okay?” Rebecka’s nostrils flared and her face flushed red.

“I hate this shirt.”

Stina furrowed her brow as she looked at her younger sister.

“Oooookay…”

Rebecka looked up at her sister and gritted her teeth.

“I fucking hate this shirt,” she said as the tears streamed down her face and her voice trembled.

“Becka…why?  I mean…” and she looked at her sister quizzically.

“EPAULETS!!!!!  IT HAS EPAULETS!!!  WHO BUYS A SHIRT WITH EPAULETS???”

Stina turned and looked toward the kitchen where Magnus was making a snack.

“Becka, don’t get upset, don’t…”

Stina took the shirt from her and she folded it quickly and put it behind her back.  In an instant Stina knew what was wrong.

She bounded up from the sofa and she moved to hug her sister.

“I’ll fold the rest. You and Magnus should go…go for a walk around the garden, or down the driveway and maybe to the corner, okay? You need to get out of the house. I’ll stay here with the babies and Viktoria.  Just 10 minutes, okay?”

Rebecka was still crying, unable to nod or agree, though she would do what her sister asked.

“I’m getting Magnus.”

Stina rushed into the kitchen where Magnus turned to see her coming toward him.

“Take her for a walk,” Stina said as she grabbed his arm and dragged him away from the fruit he was cutting up.  “She’s had a hormone crash.  She needs to walk.  Just take her down the driveway, to the corner, around the garden.”

Magnus didn’t have a chance to protest.  He tried, his mouth open and his eyes wide as Stina pushed him out to where Rebecka was sitting and crying, her body hunched over, her hair hanging around her like a veil. Magnus switched into gear, forgetting that her sister was pushing him, forgetting the fruit he had been cutting.

“Bec, alskling…come here,” he said as he knelt in front of her and gathered her in his arms.  She fell against him, letting him wrap his strong arms around her.  She cried into his shoulder and then she was sniffling.  “Let’s go for a little stroll, okay?” he said as he dried her wet cheeks.

Rebecka stood up with his help and she held onto him.  Before Magnus got to the door with her, Stina was running up behind him and pulling his head down so she could whisper in his ear, which was a shock to Magnus in the first place.  

He blinked as Stina whispered in his ear, “Don’t mention epaulets…”

Magnus pulled away from Stina, looking down at her like she was insane (and if he was honest, he looked at her like that a lot).  He reached up and rubbed his ear, and nodded his head at her.

Stina only sighed and closed the door after them.

They were halfway down the driveway, Magnus’ arms around Rebecka as she took small careful steps, when he said, “It’s alright Bec.  It’s just the pregnancy hormones.  Just…take some deep breaths and walk with me…”

Magnus was about to ask about the epaulets, but he stopped himself.

They walked down the drive, and onto the sidewalk and down to the corner of their street.  One the way back to the house, Rebecka’s crying subsided.

“I’m sorry,” she said as she looked up at him and dried her tears.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Magnus said as he smiled down at her.

“Yes, I do.” Rebecka looked away from him.  “I hate that blue shirt you have with the epaulets.  I hate it.  You don’t wear it very often…but I hate it Magnus.”

She looked up at him and he was staring down at her while they walked.

“O-okay.  Sgar got me that shirt, after I got out of the academy. I’ve had that shirt for a long time.”

He had his arm around her waist, and he was holding her hand in his other hand.

“Is there any reason? It’s blue, you always like me in blue…”

“I love you in blue!” she said as her voice raised up and echoed off the garden path.  “It’s…it’s the epaulets…I just can’t…”

Magnus’ eyes got large. He wasn’t going to understand this, at least not right now.  He sighed.

“Okay, okay.  I’ll… I can put it away…or maybe…I’ll donate it… I could use some new shirts anyway.”

Rebecka had slowed down and she clutched onto his hand as they walked.

“Listen, I want you to go up to bed when we go back inside.  I’ll bring the babies in and Viktoria can bring you some fruit and a big glass of water.  It’s your first day up.  We don’t want to wear you out.”

He smiled down at his wife, pleased that she had stopped crying, but still worried about why she hated his shirt.  He didn’t really care if he never wore that shirt again, but it was strange.

After their turn around the garden, he led her inside and upstairs where he tucked her into bed. Viktoria skipped to get her the fruit that Stina had finished cutting up and Stina brought Baby Axel in as Magnus brought in Ingrid.

The family sat together and ate fruit while the newborm babies nursed and slept.

That night, Rebecka dreamed of the first time she met Magnus in that cold harsh conference room.  She dreamed of his back to her, his blue shirt pulled tight across his back as he crossed his arms in front of his chest and he looked out the window.  She dreamed of the small pieces of fabric at his shoulders and the way they bent and lifted slightly as he tensed his muscles.

She couldn’t change it. She couldn’t escape it.

She awoke to the sound of Ingrid fussing and wanting to nurse.  Magnus was already up before Rebecka was even awake and he was bringing her the baby.

He was wearing his Joy Division shirt.  He wouldn’t wear the blue shirt with the epaulets anymore.  She reached up and held his face.

“I love you,” she whispered. She could see him smile in the dim light of their bedroom.

“You better,” he quipped and then he was going to check on Axel and Viktoria and leaving Rebecka to feed Ingrid.