#i just. even though i don't remember all the specific projects and assignments. the frustration has stayed with me

[bookwyrminspiration]

Hi hi Quil! I have a question. As an avid reader, have you read the Petit Prince/The Little Prince? It’s a very popular children’s book, so I figured you might have read it

Yes >:( I have >:(

Nonsie you have opened a can of worms. I have a grudge against the little prince that I really should've let go of at this point but haven't quite.

You see, it was an assigned reading when I was 9. And this teacher. For SOME REASON. had us spend SEVEN MONTHS on it. we COUNTED. there were other things going on at the same time too, but the little prince haunted us. we couldn't escape

and so ever since every time i see it I just go >:( because we spent SO LONG on it and it turned me off from it. Which is a shame because it's very highly regarded and well done from what I hear, but WHO makes 9yos spend SEVEN MONTHS on ONE BOOK. WHAT was she thinking

one day i'll get over it and read the little prince again, but for now. >:(

[ann1-wr1tes]

Catch these hands!

Synopsis: Leon is your mentor. At first he was apprehensive and not too happy about it. But now he realizes he may like you more than he thought..

Warnings: None!

Word Count: 1,382

A/N: So here's another repost. Hope you all enjoy!!

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You pant as you shift your stance from foot to foot. Sweat dripped from your brow and down the back of your neck as your eyes narrowed in concentration and slight nervousness as the man in front of you seemed to not even break a sweat.

Then again you weren't surprised. It was Leon Kennedy we're talking about here. So of course it looked like he was having just another normal Tuesday but for you, a rookie that was new to the D.S.O, you could feel your anxiety creep up your spine. You'd be lying if you said that your mentor didn't make you a little nervous.

Since the first moment you met Leon you knew about his history with the government and the D.S.O. He started off as a rookie cop in Raccoon city, survived a horrible outbreak, then got recruited to the D.S.O where he very quickly became a huge name and even saved the President's daughter. Of course now he is different. He is older and more jaded.

You can tell by the way he carries himself, how he always has some sort of bottle in his hand that holds an alcoholic beverage, how his eyes look at you but at the same time it looks like he's looking right through you. It was a distant look that was glassy and dull.

You could also tell that he didn't intend on ever having to mentor anyone. Though that changed when the agency decided that Leon could use a little side project, a little distraction from all the harsh missions he was assigned to. So you were dumped on him.

Despite all the alcohol he drank and how he didn't take care of himself in the least bit, you could see that there was someone lying under the surface that would peak out every once in a while. You could see this mystery person every time you improved in a skill or took some of his advice and applied it to your learning.

It was almost enough to make your flutter when you'd turn to find him looking at you with an endearing smile. Though it wouldn't last long and he'd soon be back to his scowling grimace that seemed to be permanently stuck on his face. Despite this, the small smiles you'd catch him flashing in the corner of your eye or the small chuckle that escaped his lips on occasion was enough to make you want to learn more from him, learn more about him.

But right now you were learning hand-to-hand combat. Sparring to be specific.

You remember when you had first started to spar with Leon. It was nothing short of being humiliating. You'd swing one and he'd already have you twisted around and pinned to the floor. You'd try to catch him by surprise, he was always two steps ahead of you. It was almost like he could read your thoughts, like he could expect just exactly what your next move was.

As time went by you slowly improved but it was never enough to beat Leon and while it was frustrating and a little intimidating at times you took it all in stride.

"Don't take your eyes off me." Leon warned as he lunged forward towards you. "And don't forget what I taught you."

He pulled back slightly before making a sudden swing at you. You blocked it easily, blocking the other attacks coming your way. His strikes were quick and precise, always with no hesitation. Its like it was all second nature to him, his body moved instinctively with his mind. It was like a dance. But he never showed any emotion. It was always hardened stares and pursed lips.

As Leon throws another punch you grab his wrist and twist, trying to force him to the ground with a wrist lock. In response Leon yanks his wrist forward, pulling you along with it and as soon as you collide with his chest he spins you around and has an arm wrapped around your throat.

Quickly you tap his upper arm, signalling that you give up and he lets go. He releases your neck and backs up to keep a distance between both of you, watching you carefully, his arms folded across his chest. You take a deep breath as you wipe your face of the sweat.

"Again." He says. And without missing a beat you take a defensive position ready to attack and begin again.

This continued on until you reached your limits, your stamina dwindling rapidly and your movements slowed considerably due to exhaustion. Still, you were determined to win.

Leon waits for you this time. His eyes are trained on yours, waiting for an attack as he prowls around you slowly. As you reach to strike the first blow you watch a faint grin appear on his lips and then suddenly he lunges. The next thing you know you feel yourself fly forward, hit the mat hard, and then Leon is on top of you.

Struggling to get to your knees, you shove Leon off of you before he can pin you and you settle yourself on your knees, having both hands out ready to block or grip his wrists or a hand.

Leon goes to grip the collar of your shirt and he tugs you forward. He twists you around so you lay on your back and then goes to pin your wrists. Your mind scrambles to try to find a way out until suddenly a light bulb goes off in your head.

You buck your hips up and arch your back up, causing Leon to stumble forward and almost on top of you. Thinking quickly you hook a leg around his and you shift your weight, pushing him and you to the side so you can roll on top of him.

As soon as his back hits the mat you straddle him and plant your forearm right against his neck, making it a little hard to breathe and even harder to escape when you plant your foot down on his other hand to ensure it stays down.

You look into his blue gaze with determination and he gives you a smile. There it is. There's that pretty sight that you rarely get to see.

A rare smile directed solely at you. It almost makes your heart flutter but you have to remind yourself that he's your mentor. He'd never see you in any different light…right?

To solidify your victory, Leon taps out and you quickly roll off of him. You can't seem to contain your own smile as he sits up and looks at you with a look of pride.

"Not bad Rookie. Keep fighting like that and you may just take my job." He jokes and gets to his feet, offering you his hand. You accept it gladly and allow him to help you up.

"Any improvements? Or tips?" you ask, looking at him expectantly. That was the thing about you that he couldn't help but love so much. You were always willing to learn, always wanting to know more and improve. It was admirable, it was endearing. It reminded Leon of himself in some ways.

Without saying anything, Leon's hand comes up and tucks a stray hair behind your ear.

"Take it easy, you did good and you have more to learn but for now i'd say you're fine." He says and you smile wider. A real smile. One that reaches your eyes as well. Your cheeks redden a little and you look away.

"Thank you." you say with a genuine smile.

Leon waves you off and turns around, grabbing a water bottle and tossing it to you.

Despite how badly Leon would like to ignore it, he knew that there was some part inside of him that liked you a little too much. But as he watched you grow and improve and get stronger that feeling intensified. It was becoming more apparent to him every day that there was something special about you. But he'd ignore it…or try his best to.

But what he couldn't ignore was the swelling sense of pride that bloomed in his chest as he watched you drink some much needed water.

He was proud of you, so incredibly proud of you.

[uncle-alam]

hi it's the anon from the indopak shabang. (sorry i took this long) your insights were definitely worth a lotmore than two cents. thank you! it was all so heartfelt and courageous for baring it out too.. of course, things we believe in make us do it.. it also made me realise that i probably was projecting everything that was in my bag from things going on in my life, over the frustrations piling over this issue as well.. and ive clearly missed out big time on how it actually is affecting people even now.. resulting in very dystopian ideas, that i can now see the unfiarness in. downplaying the past was almost equivalent to undoing everything that had been done so far.. and i shall try out the book you are reading as well as try to learn about the events bygone i hope you get to come here and i dream of exploring the other side of the border someday too. i hope those days are closer than farther xx

Hiii. This is a really sweet message thank u for taking a moment to drop it in my inbox.

One thing tho - the book I'm reading right now (Disrupted City by Manan Ahmed Asif) might not give you many insights to partition. Thought I should warn you abt that. It's mostly abt Lahore through the centuries.

I'm trying to think of what I would recommend you read on the subject hmm. Books on partition are a dime a dozen honestly - especially non-fiction. Personally, I read Indian Summer by Alex Vonn Tunzelmann just to give me a more precise idea of the politics in India during and after world war two. In that sense it was pretty comprehensive, but then again picking up any non fiction on partition will also help it doesn't specifically have to be this book.

Then again you don't have to limit yourself to non-fiction - those books can be a bit dry and hard to get through. There is a lot of fiction on partition - which does give one a good sense of the political climate in India at that time was felt on an individual level. I think, given current circumstances, these stories are incredibly relevant. My personal favorite is Train To Pakistan by Khushwant Singh. I'm not a huge fan of Khushwant Singh generally but this book is incredible. Alongside this of course Manto is a must read as well. Each short story of his I've come across has felt like a gut punch. I would suggest reading him in Urdu (or Hindi - I don't know which side of the border you're from) because a lot of the impact of his writing is lost when translated to English. Outside of this there are plenty of fantastic writers who, having lived through partition, have written novels, essays, and short stories which capture the volatile political landscape of that time. Ismat Chughtai and Intizar Hussain come to mind. Faiz Ahmed Faiz too if you're more into poetry. There is Ice Candy Man by Bapsi Sidwa (although I really dislike this book personally, I feel like I have to include it though since it's very Lahore-centric), and Midnight's Children by Salman Rushdie (this was my favorite book when I was 13. I'm not sure if it's actually that good. I'm no longer a huge fan of Salman Rushdie these days so hm). There is Tamas by Bhisham Sahn (this book has been in my tbr for a bit. I haven't actually read it though so I have no idea if it's any good) and ‌What the Body Remembers by Shauna Singh Baldwin (also haven't read, in my tbr). Outside of partition literature I also want to HIGHLY recommend you check out some Arundhati Roy if you haven't already. She's written about Kashmir quite a lot, both in Azaadi and The Ministry of Utmost Happiness. I had a much longer list last July but I've forgotten bits of it sorryy. I remember reading eight books on partition in that month alone - because I had free time and I wanted to be able to write abt it accurately.

This was such a long list of books though - it feels like I've assigned you homework 😭. Never talk abt books around me, I fear I won't shut up (you didn't even bring it up that much lmao idk why I went off).

Ths point is, you have honestly the rest of your life to learn about why South Asian politics is the way it is currently. The books I mentioned above - you can read them when the time suits you, it doesn't haven't to be Work. Also, of course, try to talk to folks around you. Get to understand your own community and where their political bias originated from. Again, there's no deadline for this, you have the rest of your life to learn and understand.

I don't know. I'm no authority on this. Just a teenager - you should NOT be asking for guidance from my ass. Me, the person who is abt to fail my history exam for the third time in a row.

I hope you find in this list I've compiled a book, short story, essay or poem that moves you. Wishing you all the best from this side of the border.

[lunarleylines]

This is actually a really interesting and kinda funny way to see it for me.

Lots of words after the cut about it, but I don't want to clog up everyone's feeds with it.

TLDR; I studied art in the form of graphic design and I essentially dropped out of it near the end because the lack of structure at that point meant I was struggling to complete work that was bad when I did.

I went to college for Graphic Design because of my art interests, and as I was undiagnosed with anything (I'm for sure ADHD, and fairly certain more than that but the rest is unconfirmed), the structured environment of school stuff up to then was what kept me generally going in terms of actually getting anything done. I never really studied, I did homework generally just before it was due, and I managed to graduate with over a 4.0 GPA, getting Magna Cum Laude ropes, but not the higher one (Summa Cum Laude?).

Getting to the college level, the classes with less structure were actually way harder for me (though I definitely didn't realize that was the problem), with the typically structured classes getting good grades, but I constantly avoided lectures that I wasn't required to attend, and often got by in design classes by turning in barely finished projects that I usually completed the literal night before in a rush.

I managed to get enough of a handle on that through frustration (and probably through how I often I was able to work on things alongside others) that I managed to pass the portfolio review at the end of the second year, and I honestly did some reasonably okay work so long as guidelines were clear and I was interested enough in the project.

...I then did a mediocre job at keeping up through the third year, turning out one or two decent things, but the design classes were overall a lot more technical than project focused, so I stuck with it. I was stressed out beyond belief, doing terrible work, and subconsciously doing everything in my power to get out of the classes on a regular basis, up to and including being physically ill in the mornings from what were probably stomach ulcers.

It was at the beginning of the senior year where the class structure changed from something more standard to a setup with everyone still in my group of the program merging into a single classroom/lab space focused on completing work more like that in a real-world design agency (including some especially large projects and the potential to do work for an actual client at I think two different points of the year). On top of that, since it was my senior year, I was finally able to move off-campus to a shared apartment with some friends, and so I had a much harder time sharing space with other people who were working on similar projects unless I traveled onto campus outside of standard class hours (even though most other people did).

While most people were excited to have the freedom and get more used to the "real-world" situation, I was floundering and could barely get anything done. The lack of structure, including mostly free-reign on ideas and implementation, and the dramatically less interesting subject matter of most of the projects (to me personally at least), meant that I was making bad designs and struggling to get them finished at all. For example, I remember three specific projects during that first semester of senior year, each of which had an element randomly assigned to us:

A booklet promoting a variety of decorative plant, which were mostly specific groups of flowers, but for which I ended up with ornamental grasses (which are perfectly fine, but I had zero interest in, and honestly felt like a wildly more difficult subject than others got), and I made something as ugly and boring as it felt

A logo design which would later include additional materials for what I believe was supposed to be a specific/niche product shop, for which I got decorative tile (which again, already felt specific, and then most of my concepts for it were turned down as they were too similar to existing shops, so maybe I just had bad luck on top of my executive dysfunction)

A poster design highlighting one of a selection of semi-famous buildings, which I believe was still somewhat in progress at the end of the semester. I remember I pulled a Palazzo, but even after just googling a bit, I can't remember which one. For that, I had made a garish-looking pile of beige shapes on a blue background with a pretty pathetic overall concept

I was struggling so much at the end of that first semester that the professors of the program pulled me aside and essentially asked if I still wanted to be doing the whole design thing or if I would be better off doing something else, because they didn't want me to end up failing and needing to do a whole additional year of college or more to make up for it. I ended up switched to basically a "catch-all" degree the school offered (Integrative Studies), that would allow me to make use of everything I'd done and just take a few more general classes to help round things out, and I am so glad I did that.

All that is I guess to say, creative programs are definitely not for everyone, myself clearly included. Some people hate the structure and the rules, and other people can't work without them. My experience in this may not be relatable, but I have to say, I still have that feeling sometimes of enjoying a project more if there are some reasonable guidelines and limitations, because then it's not just the project, it's also solving a problem, and gosh is it satisfying to solve a problem.

I could never go to art school. You mean I have to be creative... within rules and on a time limit? My executive dysfunction would get me kicked out inside a week