#i msiis him

[demonstars]

dream https://x.com/whotfisjovana/status/1800948127991726181?s=46&t=HIQyFtKxFIH5PkhmZzmVpA

his awkward poses swag :(

[baronessblixen]

Saw your tags:

I'M NOT CRAZY THEN. I was watching the broader Revival and My Struggles in particular and thought: Mulder has very little agency but Scully has no characterization. It's so... interesting. Because I've labored under the thought that Scully was stripped of her agency and Mulder was given all of it... and yet, no, it's the reverse. Mulder is more himself in most moments than Scully (especially CC episodes) but Scully is more active in the Struggle episodes even though she gets lesser screen time. 

It's almost like... CC saw Mulder as a time waster, and used him a lot to deviate from the plot. Scully always forwarded it in some way and therefore had lesser screen time. Which is such  lazy writing and it seems to hold true for all CC's episodes except maybe MSI. There, at least, Mulder was an active participant (even though Scully brings the case to him, he chooses to pursue it.) 

As a side note: MSII and MSIII are "through the looking glass" episodes: completely contradictory, from completely opposite angles. The pivot is so pronounced it's a little staggering. 

I will say: EWW completely with CSM's addiction to Scully. And EWW to rewriting En Ami. But strangely... there isn't any current-day damage to Scully's agency-- she's just so lazily written (back to this XDDD) that she seems chaotic, unhinged, and rudderless. She becomes pregnant in MSIV but outside of the Consortium's tampering (if one wants-- for whatever reason-- to take CSM's word as law.) It's so... strange. 

It's making clearer sense why CC resents the fans so much: it seems, from his perspective, like he went out of his way to give Scully the spotlight-- MSII-- then got backlash. And he gave fans more romantic moments in S11 but that didn't stop them from criticizing MSIV and the miraculous pregnancy. But instead of thinking, "huh, why did they get so mad at my writing?" he chalks it up to us not getting "the vision." 

After I finish MSIV, I need to go through and mark each time Scully or Mulder made an active choice in the Revival series and which time they seemed muted or character-less. I'm sure there is nuance to that discussion, but I'm also pretty sure the damage will be equally 50/50. That... will be interesting.

Well, she doesn't have that much agency, does she? Or maybe I'm just thinking ahead and of My Struggle IV. She's on screen for two minutes. I wish I was exaggerating that but I'm pretty sure someone counted and it was like 4 minutes tops, if that.

She's active in MS2 - which makes sense cause that's "her" episode. In reality, though, she isn't actually active cause it's just a vision she has. It's not even real. I've already forgotten all of MS1 but I feel like everyone had some kind of monologue and she was mostly just sitting around. Sorry. As much as I dislike CC episodes, his revival episodes are ten times worse.

In MS3, she doesn't get to do anything either. She's comatose in the hospital for most of the episode. When she wakes, she's like "we need William". It's not about her; it's about William and Mulder. My Struggle 4 is way worse in that regard.

But yes, it's written lazily. I'm not even sure if it's lazy or just plain bad. I mean maybe he really thought this was great. Oh, I don't think he took it all back in MS3 because he got backlash. He knew what he was doing in MS2. There's a scene where the camera pans in on her face and on her eye. That's when the vision starts. What he did in MS3 had nothing to do with how MS2 was received.

What romantic moments did he give Mulder and Scully? Plus One? He alluded at them having sex - we don't even get a single kiss - so that he can have his big pregnancy reveal in MS4. God forbid they have sex just because they want to have sex. According to him, they had sex twice, both times resulting in pregnancy.

CC is always so mad we don't get his "vision". Sorry for being so anti, but the more I rewatch, the angrier I get with his writing choices and his reluctance to listen and maybe reconsider a few things.

The non-CC episodes are much better in that regard! They have more character and are more actively involved - at least to me. The revival isn't all bad. The CC episodes, though... I cannot with them anymore.

[numinousmysteries]

Vanquish by Wisdom Hellish Wiles (5/9)

Started this 6 years ago after first seeing the trailer for season 11. Takes place immediately after MSII and ignores all of S11. On AO3 Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

@today-in-fic

East. William had to head east. He didn’t know exactly where, but he felt the direction tugging at him like the needle on a compass. After examining the bus schedule at the small station in town and counting up the cash and change in his wallet, he decided to take a local bus to Casper and then transfer to the Greyhound headed to St. Louis. He technically only had enough money for a ticket to Omaha, but that still left him with nearly 10 hours of time to think.

The local bus to Casper was nearly empty. William didn’t make eye contact with the driver, but the older man didn’t seem to care or even notice that a teenager was boarding alone in the middle of a school day. The driver pulled the door close and started driving away from the station before William even had a chance to sit down. 

He chose a seat toward the back and leaned his head against the cool glass of the window. Think . He commanded his brain to summon up something, anything, that could give him a clue how to find his parents but he didn’t see anything. Thoughts were racing through his mind so quickly that it almost seemed like he wasn’t thinking at all. He struggled to picture the red-haired woman he knew to be his mother, or the man on the beach, but their faces were blurred and distorted in his mind’s eye. 

As the bus pulled up to the next stop he considered getting off and turning around. Maybe this was a mistake and he should have gone with Monica. At least she had a plan and he could learn more before deciding if he wanted to be a part of it. But then he remembered looking into the eyes of the man on the beach, the man he knows is his father, and he felt more determined than ever that he had to find his parents.

Oddly, two men in suits and sunglasses board the bus at the next stop. William looks up nervously from his seat in the back and see them approach the driver. He looks down at his lap to try to seem inconspicuous.

“We have to hold you here for a moment. We’re doing a sweep for illegal border crossers,” said one of the suited men.

Border crossers? In Wyoming? William frowned to himself. That didn't make any sense. 

“Do what you gotta do,” said the driver, clearly apathetic to whatever was going on. 

The men started making their way down the aisle giving cursory glances to the handful of other passengers. William kept staring at his hands on his lap hoping to avoid their attention.

“Son,” the first man said as he approached William. He has a square jaw, buzzed short hair and was still wearing his sunglasses with mirrored lenses. “Do you have any identification?”

“Um, I have my learner’s permit?” William said hesitantly but made no move to retrieve it from his backpack. 

“William, you’re going to have to come with us,” said the second man, impatiently. 

“How do you know my name?” William felt his heart racing and he clutched his backpack closer to his chest as if it had any power to protect him.

“We don’t have time for this, William.” It was the second man again. He was taller than his companion and with slightly longer hair but the same suit and sunglasses. “It’s in your best interest to come with us.” 

William didn’t budge. He froze in place staring straight ahead at the seat in front of him when he felt hands on his arms pulling him up out of the seat. The first man lifted him up by the sleeves of his sweatshirts and dragged him up the aisle.

“Help!” William cried out, but the handful of other passengers avoided his eyes and the bus driver only gave him a shrug before the men pushed him down the stairs.

The driver closed the bus door behind him and started driving away. 

“What’s going on?” William felt his heart racing. The plan to work with Monica and his grandfather had all seemed manageable when he was sitting in her office discussing it, but this reality felt new and scary. 

"Your grandfather was very upset you didn’t show up to meet him today,” said the shorter man. “He sent us to come get you.”

“But how did you find me?”

The two men grinned at each other and William’s eyes flitted between them.

“You think a powerful man like your grandfather doesn’t have eyes everywhere?” said the taller man. “Now come on, they’re expecting you.” 

The two men grabbed William from either side and shoved him toward a black sedan waiting in the bust stop parking lot. He looked around to see if there was anyone he could cry out to for help, but the rest of the lot was abandoned. He ducked his head as the shorter man pushed him into the backseat while the taller man got into the driver’s seat. As the driver sat down his jacket opened up and William could see a holstered gun in his belt. 

He swallowed hard. This was really happening. Two armed men had kidnapped him and were taking him to meet his supposed grandfather so he could help him survive an alien invasion. If he weren’t so terrified in the moment he would have laughed because it all sounded so insane. Instead, he stared out the window as the car pulled out of the parking lot and onto the highway. 

They drove in silence for more than an hour, headed east on Route 26 with nothing to see but empty fields and blue skies. 

“No gas stations in this state?” The driver said as he turned to the shorter man in the passenger seat. 

Not much of anything here , William wanted to respond but was still too paralyzed by terror to speak. 

“Might have to turn off the highway,” said the shorter man.

“No!” William called out from the backseat. “There’s a big service station in a few miles. I’ve been down this way with my parents before. I think so, anyway.”

“Want to be more specific?” asked the driver.

“Um, I don’t remember. But it’s coming up. Don’t get off the highway,” William said. He was only vaguely confident in this. He knew that he’d driven on this road with his parents before and there were gas stations sparsely spread out. He also knew he’d have a better chance of finding someone who could help him at a busy highway rest stop rather than a single-pump gas station in a rural Wyoming town.

“He doesn’t remember,” said the shorter man with a chuckle. “Kid’s supposed to be the savior of all mankind and he can’t give us solid directions.” 

“Well, we’ll take your word for it, kid,” said the driver. “Not like we have any better ideas.” 

William held his breath as the miles ticked by until finally he saw a large service station with a rest stop on the horizon.

“There you go,” said the driver who spotted it nearly at the same time. “Maybe he’s psychic after all.” 

They pulled up to a pump at the gas station and the driver got out to fill up the car. 

“Can I, um, go to the bathroom?”William asked. 

The shorter man in the passenger seat sighed and then said, “Fine, but I’m coming with you. And don’t try anything stupid.”

The rest stop wasn’t extensive, just a small coffee shop and a single-person bathroom. The shorter man peeked into the bathroom first and then, after finding no windows or other means of escape, pushed William inside.

“Be quick,” he said. “I’ll be right outside.” 

William walked in, locked the door behind him, and tried to come up with a plan. 

Growing up, his ability to see what others were thinking or subtly move objects with his mind would come and go. His “therapy” with Monica was all about learning to focus his power by tuning out all external stimuli. She also helped him unlock a new skill—how to subtly shift other people’s perception and create a new reality. He could use it to make himself appear to be someone else or even make himself, in the eyes of others at least, invisible.

He still hadn’t quite mastered this newest ability, but If there were a time he needed to do it, it was now.  Like water , he reminded himself, flow like water . Monica had a hippy-dippy way of speaking that could make him laugh but some of her sayings stuck with him. He took a deep inhale and closed his eyes, imagining the atoms of his physical body shifting into a fluid state. 

Then he opened the bathroom door. He stared straight at the shorter man sent to guard him but there was no look of recognition. Instead, the man looked puzzled. He swiveled his head from side to side, searching. 

It worked, William thought to himself. He wasn’t sure how long he could make this last so he took advantage of the moment and sprinted through the rest stop and back out into the parking lot. The driver was still filling up the car and didn’t even look up when the door to the service station swung open. 

He reached into his pocket for his phone but then realized contacting his family or anyone else could potentially put them in danger. There was also the chance he was being tracked by his phone. With that thought, he took the phone out of his pocket and tossed it across the lot. The sound of it hitting the pavement caught the attention of the driver at the car and he looked up but didn’t register William.

The lot was sparsely populated and William evaluated his options. Two semi trucks were parked around the other side of the building. He ducked in between them and concentrated on reorienting himself to sensory details, the feeling of the wind on his skin, the smell of gasoline from the pumps, just like Monica had taught him, to bring himself back into his own body.

“You lost?” he heard a voice and nearly jumped in shock. William spun around and saw a truck driver peering at him from the window in the cab. 

“I- I was on a field trip….with my school and I think the bus left without me,” he said.  

“Anyone you can call?” asked the driver.

“I don’t have my phone.” 

“Well, do you know where they were headed?”

“Um, South Carolina?” William heard the words as if someone else was speaking them. Where did that come from? he wondered.  

“Damn.” The driver whistled. “That’s a long drive. Well, I can take you as far as Chicago if that helps.” 

“That’d be a huge help, thanks, sir,” he said.

“No problem. Hop in.”

William climbed up to the passenger side of the cab.

“I’m Jake by the way,” said the driver.

“William,” he said. 

Jake started up the engine and turned the truck toward the highway. William glanced back at the parking lot and saw the two men who’d taken him from the bus standing in front of their car arguing. Neither paid any attention to the semi-truck driving away.

William tried focusing on the images in his mind of his birth mother. He didn’t know why, but he felt confident that he had to find her—and his biological father—to learn the truth.

[heizecult-moved]

is this gna be the duet with ten they were talking about sjsnwkzmakxqniansj it is isnt it its taeten isnt it were all gna die aren't we

[likos064]

More Free-Thought Ramblings

Posting again, though no one’s listening

RAMBLING 8

The one person on The X-Files that Miles Robbins looks the most alike is Billy Miles. More than Krychek or any version of the Cigarette Smoking Man (Chris Owens or the new guy). 

It is amusing that the casting department of Twin Peaks didn’t care about parents and children looking alike, thus hiring the actor who played Scully’s father, Don S. Davis to play the father of Bobby Brigss, portrayed by Dana Ashbrook, who has dark hair and that kid looking more like Miles Robbins, however, that doesn’t mean that anyone resembles anyone. It is just a fun observation. Especially since they were more careful about making the Scully siblings look alike, and have a small resemblance to their father, but not mother. Why no one has dark haired when their mother has is a genetical mystery, recessive redhead line in her blood?

RAMBLING 9

I would argue that the child most fucked up by the Scully-Family dynamic is Bill. I don’t know Charlie as a person besides being absent at every family crisis and using his older sister as a baby sitter, per Home she babysat her nephews who watched Babe the entire time. However, from what we learn in One Breath and Christmas Carol, Melissa did whatever the fuck she wanted. In Anazazi, deleted scene, she stays with Maggie, and she doesn’t seem to have returned before Scully is in a coma. It seems like Mulder is the only support Maggie had during Scully’s abduction. Bill is introduced during the cancer arc, and then when he is to have his long awaited child, he and Tara had fertility issues. I think Bill tried to be the man but was crushed under the enormity of his father. So he became a stricter version. Bill Scully Sr seems way less overbearing.

Maggie is abusive and emotionally manipulative when the only time her daughter calls her is when she needs something. 

Would someone run to a person that they only have an obligation bond with when they are scared, and sad. Scully runs to Maggie when she believes Mulder is dead, meets up with Melissa first - who sucks at comfort, and asks for her mother and when she believes that he is part of the conspiracy. She feels safe with her mother. Why? Calling her mother when she needs someone to talk to in Within.

Vilifying good characters and defending evil ones.

The insistence on making women who are portrayed as cruel towards Mulder victims; flawed and imperfect as we all are while not giving the same consideration to men: Bill Mulder vs Teena Mulder, Phoebe and Diana vs Jeffrey Spender.

When should Maggie have defended Mulder to Bill? Scully never does it either.

Scully and Mulder being dismissive of Melissa’s spirituality

Maggie only following her daughter’s wishes in One Breath, it is in accordance with Scully’s living will.

RAMBLING X

Chris Carter’s writing focus being the message, not necessarily the plot but the greater societal commentary.

Vince Gilligan focusing on character, always character and not necessarily Mulder and Scully

Glen and James clearly showing their disdain for Mulder and David in their writing and that being rationalised as writing for both characters and writing the true Mulder and Scully.

MSI being about Mulder

MSII being about Scully

MSIII being about the Cigarette Smoking Man

MSIV being about William/Jackson

The breakup not being Chris Carters construct, but he being forced to take the public blame. The other writers giving much more of a mileage than Chris. Chris writing Plus One, but having to explain in an interview that they aren’t back together, referencing the later episodes particularly Rm9sbG93XJz (Followers) and Nothing Lasts Forever.

Glen and James never wanted Scully with Mulder. They wrote Scully the victim of the man who will simply never be worthy of her in their eyes. She can do whatever she wants and he is just supposed to be there without any thoughts and feelings of his own. A silent, nay silenced stoic rock that she can lean on when she needs him. That doesn’t exist outside of her.

Chris always seeing Mulder and Scully together but focusing on the spiritual romantic platonic connection, same as Gillian did with Scully and Daniel in all things, and not the sexual one.

Chris being blamed for other writers decisions. James seemingly killing off Jackson in Ghouli, the parallel to All Souls, somehow becoming Chris’ fault.

Kristen Cloke Morgan and Shannon Hambling arguing that a woman cannot exist as a person if she is with a man.

The obsession with equality in number of lines in Followers, but no real critique at the sidelining of David and Mulder in Home Again and Ghouli.

The Scully Effect panel complaining that Mulder gets one line about his son in Familiar. Whiie the entire episode of Ghouli focuses on Scully’s feelings about her son.

The MSR fandoms female contingents hatred of men. 

Glen Morgan and James Wong coming back to finish what they started in season four. Separate Scully and Mulder, destroying any chance of a romance, destroying any connection by having Scully sign Mulder into a mental institution.

Leaving him over a clinical depression.

Equality meaning equality not preferential treatment.

Scully’s sister and Mulder’s father both being killed in the season 2/season 3 three parter. Season 3 being about Scully getting justice for her sister. Mulder’s father’s death being swept under the carpet and unexplored.

RAMBLING 11

Questions: Who named Jackson, Chris or James, or rather renamed him? - commentary: Chris refers to him as William in his cue cards for the episodes, while James uses Jackson - so probably James

Does the renaming mean something?

Is it a hint that we should question Mulder’s paternity, William being named after his father, Fox Mulder’s father, William Mulder to ascertain paternity in Existence.

Name something and make it yours.

RAMBLING 12

If Mulder and Scully had a sixteen-year-old living with them in This said child would’ve ended up in the middle of a gun fight - their home not being safe. If the kid is at school or at a friend’s house to explain the absence, mom or dad would have to call/send a message so the kid stay safe. However, that could alert the bad guys to the kids present and they might use the kid to draw out the parents in a hostage situation.

RAMBLING 13

FOX the network waiting such a long time to announce a hiatus for The X-Files despite having filmed Conversation on the Fox Lot in January at the TCA.

RAMBLING 14

Gillian announcing that she is not doing anymore season of The X-Files after filming the first five episodes: My Struggle III, This, Plus One, The Lost Art of Forehead Sweat and Ghouli. Her and David’s Conversation on the Fox Lot centring around their age taking a toll on them in action scenes. Making her run, the handcuffs drawing blood. Is it the physicality of The X-Files that makers her reluctant to continue? The most physically taxing episode for her was This, sliding under a table, running, fighting and running in handcuffs. They also spend more time on camera when doing The X-Files than their other projects. I guess that is what happens when you’re not doing a traditional ensemble show.

RAMBLING 15

Emily - The doctor trying to confer fatherhood on Mulder but Scully denying it while claiming motherhood.

RAMBLING 16

The debunking of regression hypnosis. Malleability of memories. Convincing people they killed someone through memory manipulation experiment

RAMBLING 17

The ridiculing of men, the pedestalizing of women 

Personal preference of actor guiding the writing, humiliating David. Also present in fanfic, writers taking their frustations of David leaving the show out on Mulder. Interestingly such a practice has never been done against Gillian. No matter how angry people get with her they never punish Scully.

Penalising of male actors, sunflower seeds, hanging off buildings 

Men deserve to be punished, evil = men, male

RAMBLING 18

Infantilising Mulder, making him a flat farther, even as a joke

Difference between not doing something because of time prioritising and inability to complete a task due to executive function disabilities, never learning how to do it = not equating with incompetence, stupidity

Ignoring Scully’s issues, disturbing tendencies in discussions other than to defend Iolocus.

RAMBLING 19

Writing about the separation, which isn’t necessary and only TV show related, as a failure of one person = read male 

RAMBLING 20

Blaming Mulder for MSR not happening sooner, ignoring Scully not being ready or willing to date him before all things, dedicated relationship.

Complaining and ridiculing Mulder’s need for Scully’s consent while complaining about men’s inability to ask for consent, their ignoring consent when it’s not given, and assuming that they always have consent.

Ignoring that Mulder has to make every move, and complaining when that doesn’t happen quickly enough.

Inability to understand that men can be scared of being in a relationship for the same reasons as women, and not dismiss it as commitment issues.

RAMBLING 21

The double standards in the fandom, anything is okay as long as the writer is a woman, see people complaining about scenes in episodes written by women and blaming it on Chris Carter, not remembering who wrote it or being allowed to do anything in fanfics without being criticised.

Defending Mulder torture fanfics while calling Chris a misogynist for anything horrible that happens to Scully. Ignoring any pain dealt to men. Making Scully the only victim. Minimising Mulder being hospitalised more than Scully, kidnapped and endangered more, while insisting that Scully is always portrayed by Chris as a damsel in distress. Equality can’t happen when we can’t hurt both main characters.

Perpetuating the stereotype that women’s violence against men is funny and or acceptable.

Assault is assault even when it happens to a man and even when the assaulter is a woman. Anything you would call assault if it happens to Scully is assault when it happens to Mulder.

RAMBLING 22

That feeling when you realise James Wong cast Jackson (William) for season 11 after writing Mulder/Scully’s dreams about him in season 10 and the kids looking nothing alike.

RAMBLING 23

After thinking about it I don’t believe that David Duchovny’s Mulder has PTSD after his abduction episode would’ve been so happily received. Even now when people write about Mulder and Scully post his abduction it is always with the implication that he is in the wrong. That he should “man up” for Scully and the baby’s sake. An episode written by David would most likely have been much more sympathetic to Mulder, and quite possibly have been quite Mulder-centric. Justifying his need to find balance before taking on the role as a father, which is something he has to assume rather than know.

RAMBLING

Where does the idea that Mulder is not kind or attentive so that Scully would be surprised if he shows kindness coming from?

RAMBLING 24

Related Rambling, but I’m still waiting for that answer.

Paternity of William being an issue due to the implication of lack of consent. Would you be okay if Mulder wasn’t William’s biological father because Scully slept with another man while dating Mulder, tried IVF with someone different - someone else that she knew or an anonymous donor? Which method is preferred? What is more important Mulder being Jackson’s biological father or his creation being consensual?

Let’s stop pretending. Make William’s Scully’s alone and Glen Morgan and James Wong can finally write what they want to, the Scully panel won’t be pissed that Mulder got one line about their son in Familiar, and all the pain and all the feelings can be hers alone, like they already are.

[julystorms]

NO I’M NOT DONE RANTING YET

Strap in lads, it’s complainin’ time!!

I honestly have no idea what CC was thinking with this season of TXF. The only thing I can think of is that S10 received so many complaints about Einstein and Miller that he decided they had to somehow get rid of them, and then he hatched this harebrained pile of garbage I had to sit through.

Look, my previous posts aside, the entire episode felt like a really long, painfully mediocre Ford commercial. The camera angles were atrocious and kept cutting out and in; I’ve never seen a car chase scene so poorly done in my entire life. The music didn’t once add to anything; it just made the entire thing feel more like a soap opera. I still hate beyond belief what has been done with Monica Reyes’ character; that alone is enough to make me refuse to turn in to the next episode. (But that’s a rant for another day, isn’t it. I could talk for hours about Monica.)

Skinner barely did anything and could have been good, but the only good bit in there with him in it was when CSM asked if he could light up in his car, harkening back in a painful way to Skinner’s “no smoking” sign in his office about a zillion seasons ago. By painful I mean, it was kind of like a slap in the face, like Star Wars: The Force Awakens dropping 87 "references” throughout the film to make you go “OH LOOK I REMEMBER THAT.” Enough, pal, we get it. We know these characters better than you do by this point! We don’t need constant reminders!

Making MSII a vision instead of the reality was, IMO, a huge mistake. I guess it’ll calm the people who hated Einstein and Miller down, but I personally felt they were just about the only good things S10 had going for it...and anyway, what a waste of an entire episode of time.

Spender kind of felt like he came out of nowhere just to be weird. Scully got in her car and drove knowing she was impaired; that was always a very Mulder thing to do. Maybe I’m being a tad harsh here, but...OOC much? 

Mulder’s constant voiceover narration made this episode about ten times worse than it needed to be, and that’s not even on the actor; the script was just...legitimately bad. Embarrassingly so, even. I cringed through it.

And then we have that final part. Chris Carter giving us the one-two punch of CSM committing medical rape against Scully, that one-two punch being 1) medical rape, and 2) William isn’t Mulder’s son. Even if this isn’t true, that’s a disgusting thing to even imply! And if it is true... Well, that’s not something I’d like to think about now.

I thought S10 was bad. I really did. I didn’t enjoy it. I thought it did a great job of mocking TXF and of making the actors look old and out-of-date instead of still-capable. I thought it butchered Monica Reyes’s characterization and I knew instantly upon viewing it why Robert Patrick didn’t come back for the season. It’s for the best he didn’t. Doggett’s characterization would have been every bit as messed up as Reyes’s if he’d come back. 

But ya know, I thought, that one episode was at least kind of funny! And hey, Miller and Einstein are fun in their ignorance and willingness to still, somehow, get tangled up in this mess. It’s been a while since we had fresh faces in this series, and it’s nice having them around. Doggett was fun. Reyes was fun. Why not Miller and Einstein too? I was looking forward to seeing what was done with them in S11.

But boy, right out of the gate, S11 erases their S10 role and renders them obsolete, continues to further butcher Monica’s characterization (while simultaneously making her look useless), and turns the entire series into a poorly-written, poorly-acted, poorly-filmed daytime soap opera.

[nostalgicphile]

In MSIII CSM doesn't have a tracheotomy & half face isn't missing like in Scully's vision/MSII. I wonder if his wounds will happen later in the season to show us that the future Scully saw is happening or they forgot it (I can't believe they forgot something like that). If we take under consideration the change in Scully's wig maybe at some point in the second half we'll have a time jump or we'll see a flash forward of the world she saw in her vision, this time from William's POV

Between this, and the fact that I was just thinking about the fact that the whole reason Mulder left in S9 was because he was in danger as William’s father and the Provenance/Providence prophecy that William would follow in his father‘s footsteps if he lived and the fact that William was was kidnapped and literally NO ONE was assigned to protect him as an infant, even though he was such a TREASURE to supposedly the most powerful man in the world makes me wonder why I ever try to apply logic to this show. No wonder I drink.

[kateyes224]

So if William is not found, would Mulder and Scully get back together?

Yeah, I really hope so. But William HAS to be addressed. He's presented to us in MSII as the key to Mulder's survival, and potentially to the survival of the human race. We're going to have to meet him during S11 at some point.

[enigmaticxbee]

S10 Rewatch - Dialog

Voiceovers: We’re back on the mytharc opening voiceovers this season, although rather the classic monotone but melodramatic philosophizing of early seasons it’s just an excuse for a recap - of Mulder’s backstory in 10x01 My Struggle and of Scully’s backstory in 10x06 My Struggle II. No classic casefile closing voiceovers this season. We do get Mulder and Tad O’Malley narrating a clip show during their conspiracy diatribe in MSI. So there’s that.

Catch Phrases: The revival goes catch phrase crazy. Mulder and another character both use “the truth is out there”. Meanwhile “I want to believe” is used by Mulder in 3 episodes, by Scully in 2, by Miller in 1, and CSM 1 - it shows up in every season 10 episode but one (10x02 Founder’s Mutation). Surprisingly no one references “trust no one” though. Rest assured, they still talk a LOT throughout the season about “truth” and “trust” and “belief”.

I’m Fine: No “I’m Fine”s this season 😳

It’s Me: Not much “it’s me”ing this season - only once from Scully to Mulder in 10x03 Mulder & Scully Meet the Were-Monster, and once to her mother in 10x04 Home Again. And only phone conversations between Mulder and Scully in a couple episodes. Of course Mulder not answering when she calls in MSII because CC didn’t want them to interact the whole episode for some reason didn’t help.

Scuuullllaaaaayy! Muullllderrrr!: Just in Were-Monster. Could always use more.

Memorable Lines:

- Scully: It’s fearmongering claptrap, isolationist techno-paranoia so bogus and dangerous... (10x01 My Struggle)

- Mulder: How do you know that? Scully: I’m old school, Mulder - pre-google. (10x02 Founder’s Mutation)

- Mulder: You’re never “just” anything to me Scully. (10x02 Founder’s Mutation)

- Scully: Mulder, the internet is not good for you. (10x03 Mulder & Scully Meet the Were-Monster)

- Scully: Yeah, this is how I like my Mulder. Mulder: So you’re agreeing with me? Scully: No! You’re batcrap crazy! (10x03 Mulder & Scully Meet the Were-Monster)

- Scully: Besides, you forget - I’m immortal. (10x03 Mulder & Scully Meet the Were-Monster)

- Scully: Back in the day, did… we ever come across the ability to just… wish someone back to life? Mulder: I invented it. When you were in the hospital, like this. Scully: You’re a dark wizard, Mulder. Mulder (laughs): What else is new? (10x04 Home Again)

- Mrs Scully: My son… is named William, too. (10x04 Home Again)

- Scully: I need to work. (10x04 Home Again)

- Scully: But I can’t help but think of him, Fox. I can’t help it. I believe that you will find all of your answers. You will find the answers to the biggest mysteries, and I will be there when you do… But my mysteries… I’ll never have answered. (10x04 Home Again)

- Scully: Nobody [down here] but the FBI’s most unwanted. I’ve been waiting twenty-three years to say that. (10x05 Babylon)

[ghostbustermelanieking]

relinquo

s9: post the truth and release, with flashbacks to my struggle ii; references to william and john doe and 4-d. doggett and reyes. part of my series that i write as i rewatch the x files.

Summary: How Doggett and Reyes left the X-Files.

note: this fic arose out of a desire to explore several different things: doggett and reyes’s partnership, what happened to doggett between season 9 and 10, redeeming reyes (because it needed to happen) and exploring why she’s (seemingly) working with csm. (i mostly skimmed over the msii flashbacks, since msii was all undone but reyes is clearly working with csm in s11... i took creative liberties.) i also wanted to explore doggett’s feelings about catching his son’s murderer in release, and how that related to scully’s decision in william (since doggett and scully are two characters who have lost children and confront this fact in two episodes one after the other and it’s never acknowledged!!). mulder and scully aren’t in this fic, but that didn’t stop me from mentioning them five million times.

warning for discussion of doggett’s son’s death.

---

For years, Doggett has associated Monica with the moment he found his son dead. He's always felt like it was unfair to her, after everything they've been through, but the fact remains. He brings her along when he and Barbara meet to scatter Luke's ashes for comfort, but a part of him also feels like he is doing it to reassociate her in his mind with a pleasant memory instead of a horrible one. She is his friend, and it's become easier to be around her as time goes on, enjoyable—he doesn't know what he'd do half the time without a partner like her—but she is also at the center of too many unpleasant memories.

Doggett feels more companionable towards her than he ever has, through the years they've known each other. After the case closed, he and Monica used to meet regularly to review notes on the case, try to find the killer. Out of everyone who worked the case, the NYPD or the FBI, Monica was one of the only people that he felt like really cared about the case. That Luke was more than another number. (He'd even heard rumors, years later, that she'd cried in the bathroom during the case.) Once every few months had become once every year had become once every few years; he'd called her once when he entered the FBI, they'd been on the same task force before, but other than that, they mostly didn't stay in touch. He wouldn't have called Monica a friend before they became partners.

Now, she's undeniably his friend. Now, he's glad to have an ally, a familiar one, in this strange journey that he likely shouldn't be on. Being in the X-Files office has always felt strange, like standing in someone else's shoes (Agent Mulder's, mainly), but it feels even stranger without Scully. Like he's an intruder. Having Monica along for the ride helps.

When Scully and Mulder are gone, disappeared into the night like bandits, the feeling is even worse. It's absurd, but Doggett feels like a ghost, haunting the wrecked shell of the basement office. After he and Monica get back from New Mexico, they clean up the wreckage of the office together, picking it up, filing away the files that weren't stolen. Doggett saves the poster. If he owes Mulder and Scully anything, it's that.

---

But then again, maybe he doesn't owe them anything. Mulder's only ever resented him. Scully became more and more distant as she collapsed into herself, and John used to think that he understood, but that was before Monica told him what she had done. That she'd given the kid away. And Doggett understands the fear of having your kid in danger, hurt, more than most do, but he still cannot comprehend that she gave William up for adoption, the cute little baby who Doggett has held on his lap on occasion when Scully is doing their autopsies for them and recruits him and Monica to watch the kid. (Pains of a single mom.) He'd never said anything, of course, it wasn't his place, but he'd felt unexpected resentment rising in his throat when he heard the news. Selfish envy, that Dana had a son to throw away. They'd gone for drinks, once, the three of them, after they closed Luke's case, and Scully had begun by congratulating him awkwardly and ended in crying all over them both and apologizing repeatedly. He understands and he doesn't; she is mourning a son that she chose to leave. And even though she did it to keep him safe and it's clearly been hell for her, he can't help but be just a little bit jealous that she had a choice to make.

Doggett can't let himself be too mad at Dana, though. He can't. He's only ever known her in varying stages of grief; his initial thought when he'd heard the news about Mulder, when he told her and watched her face crumple with tears, was, Not again. He didn't know how he could support her through another one of Mulder's deaths. (A fucking ridiculous, tragic sentence.) He can't blame Scully because he's had a front seat to too much of this shit. He knows what she's been through. But he knows lost children, too. That is one thing he and Scully and Mulder, even, understand about each other.  

Most of the time, Doggett can't decide whether he owes Mulder and Scully or not. He's loyal; everyone from his buddies in the Marines and the NYPD to his co-workers in the FBI have commented on it. The furthest he's strayed from his loyalty has been divorcing Barbara, and that hadn't even been his idea. (She'd needed space, and he gave it to her.) And that loyalty extends to Scully, and Mulder by default. Once his partner, now his friend, and Scully has stuck her neck out for him before. Mulder, too, even. But the two of them have this cliquish air about them, excluding all others unless someone is useful in protecting the other. (Even Skinner has commented on it, and Skinner is more loyal to Mulder and Scully than he is.) It's impossible not to feel like an outlier, even when one of them is gone. That was why Doggett was so grateful when Monica was assigned to the X-Files; finally, a partner that was his.

He and Monica are reassigned to the VCS shortly after Mulder and Scully escape. They are not prosecuted for their role in Mulder's escape. They are kept together as partners, news that Skinner delivers proudly, adding on that he fought for this. He looks surprised when Doggett and Monica only thank him mildly; Doggett figured they'd see each other whether they stayed partners or not. He's all the way home before he realizes: Skinner is used to stick his neck out for Mulder and Scully and their all-consuming partnership. Maybe he even misses them.

It takes weeks upon weeks of no weird-ass cases with ghouls and goblins, no crazy conspiracies, for Doggett to realize that he does, too. In a way.

At least he still has Monica. At least that part of his recent life changes still feels normal.

---

Monica and John end up at her apartment after work one night, beers from the fridge and Polish sausage from the stand John is always raving about. He gives her a funny look in response to her wistful one when he presents the food to her, and she has to catch herself from bringing the whole ordeal with Lukesh up. It's strange, knowing that there's an entirely different reality that no one remembers but her. Another universe, even, where she is dead. She's found X-Files where Mulder reported similar phenomenon, but she never got the chance to ask him about it.

It's bizarre not to have Dana around after all this time, over a year. Part of her missed the excitement, but she missed her friend more than anything. She comments on the unusualness of it, and John bobs his head back and forth in agreement. “Weird not to be waking up in the middle of the night to chase down some alien or something,” he comments.

Monica nods her agreement. She's half-afraid that someone’s going to come after them the way they've been going after Dana and Mulder for years, but she hasn't seen any signs of it yet. She hopes it'll never come to that.

She and John drink their beer and eat their Polish sausage. It's the kind of companionable she can really appreciate.

---

When Monica thinks about it for long enough, she realizes that she's been there when the two people she would currently consider her best friends lost their sons. And remembering that makes her chest sting with sudden guilt.

She's made her peace with Luke Doggett, more or less. She'll always feel guilty about being unable to save Luke before it was too late—and she'll live with the moment where she realized it was room late for the rest of her life, she and John both will—but catching Regali helped alleviate some of her pain in that area. They've done everything that they can do. But William Scully… she didn't even have a hand in that decision, and she still feels some of the guilt for it. She was there, she tried to talk Dana out of it, but she couldn't. And now Dana and Mulder both have to live with that decision. Monica barely knows Fox Mulder, but she also was there when he met his son for the first time, watched him carry Dana and the baby out of that house,  and she saw the tremendous look of love on his face. A nervous, devoted father.

Skinner had told them, remorsefully, that he'd told Mulder that Dana had given up William. “I know it was Scully's place, but I couldn't bear him asking about that poor kid,” he'd said. “Knowing that he wouldn't get to see him… But Jesus Christ, the look on his face…” And Monica had felt a little of that guilt. She'd had a chance to stop it.

She knows, intellectually, she couldn't have stopped Dana outside of physically taking the baby away from her. The same way she knows she couldn't have saved Luke. But a small part of her insists there was a chance. She had a chance no one else had.

William isn't the first child Dana has lost, either. She told Monica months ago about a daughter, made without her knowledge or consent, an experiment who died painfully days after Dana found her. This conspiracy that she and John have been roped into chasing, it's taken away both of Dana's children and Dana's sister (the one she said Monica reminds her of) and Mulder's sister and Mulder's parents and countless other horrors Monica has only read about in the Files.

Out of all the agents assigned to the X-Files at one point (even Jeffrey Spender, who Monica only met once, and Diana Fowley, who died before Monica ever arrived), Monica has experienced the least amount of loss. She still has both of her parents. She isn't a parent, and doesn't know if she'll ever want to be one, but nevertheless, she has never lost a child. All of her siblings are alive. She has never been kidnapped or tortured or ended up in the hospital for anything other than a car accident or the expected injuries on cases. It makes her feel bizarrely lucky and guilty at the same time.

She's watched this conspiracy of men and monsters and aliens take so much away from Dana and Mulder and others, and she's only had knowledge of it for a year. And now, with Dana and Mulder gone and the X-Files closed, that should be the end of it, but Monica isn't ready to let it go. When she thinks of William Scully growing up somewhere with someone else's name, when she thinks of lost sisters and daughters and all the times she's seen Dana cry over her lost partner. When she thinks of Dana's friends, the Gunmen, who she liked quite a lot, dead in Arlington. When she thinks of John near death in the hospital because he tried to protect Dana's baby. All of it. She can't walk away from that.

Someone sends a postcard to Monica's apartment. Colorado, snowy mountains even though it's the middle of summer. It reads, simply, Thank you, and is signed with a simple, tiny DS.

“Did you get the postcard from Scully?” John asks her the next day in the parking garage. (Their parking spots are next to each other, close to the basement because their new assignment didn't come with new parking spaces.)

“Yes,” says Monica. “From Colorado.”

“Huh. Mine was from South Dakota.” John stabs the elevator button with the tip of his finger.

“I guess she's trying to cover their tracks,” Monica says as they step into the elevator.

“Hmm.” John rocks back and forth on his heels. “I just don't understand why they don't leave the country like Kersh told 'em too.”

“Maybe it's too late to get over the border,” Monica offers, a little defensive. “Or maybe they… didn't want to leave the search behind just yet.”

John blinks at her in surprise. “Why the hell wouldn't they wanna leave it behind?” he asks, astonished. “After all the danger it's put them in?”

Monica crosses her arms, the elevator dinging as they move up. “Think about it,” she says in a soft voice. “There was a reason Mulder wouldn't testify, try to save his life. And it certainly wasn't to protect this truth he's spoke of. There's something else he found, maybe even something he found worth pursuing.”

John nods, clearly in thought. The door dings again as it slides open, other agents climbing on the elevator. “I just don't see the point,” he says finally, quietly, bending down to speak into her ear. “After all they've both lost.”  

The elevator door closes.

---

It's a missing child case that does it. Somehow, Doggett always knew it would be that.

The problem with the Violent Crimes Section is that, well, the crimes are violent. And Doggett has seen a lot in his time, he has a strong stomach and he can handle most things… But the victim reminds him of his son.

Doggett used to use his pain as a motivator, in the mindset of I can help this family, this child, even if I can't help my son. I can bring their child back, or I can bring them the peace I never had. It worked with Billy and Josh Underwood, and with other cases where children are in danger. And he's avoided cases with children as much as possible, but it's inevitable that he's had to work on a few. But this one feels different. After all he's gone through with his son's murder in recent months, looking the bastard who did it in the eye and having him explain why… he doesn't know how he can watch someone else go through this.

He remembers how it felt in Mexico, the gut-wrenching moment when he'd realized that the little boy he dreamt of was dead, had been murdered years and years ago. He hadn't remembered his life, and he's glad he does now, but there was nothing worse than those brief days when he actually thought his son was alive. At home, missing him, worried about him, ready to hug him when he got home. Everything in this past year, finding Luke's murderer and believing Luke was alive and watching everything Dana had gone through with her kid… It's too hard. The picture of Luke on his mantle makes him want to cry, want to throw up.

He calls Barbara in a drunken moment of weakness. She is nice—nicer than he deserves, all things considered. She refuses to reminiscence with him, stops him anytime he says anything like, “Hey, do you remember…”, but she does console him. And finally, she seems to hit the nail on the head in a way that shocks him to the core. “You've been chasing Lukie all this time,” she says. “Never walking away, working in careers that remind you of him. And I never understood that until you found the guy who did it. But John… he's dead now. It's over. We let Luke go. And now… maybe it's time for you to move on.”

John hunches over, his ribs against his knees, rubs at his face with his callused palms. “I just don't want to forget him,” he whispers. Not the way he did in Mexico; a willful sort of forgiving, where he can pretend it never happened, avoid thinking about his son every day so he doesn't feel the pain. It's what he'd silently accused Barbara of, when she pushed him away before finally divorcing him (“I need to forget,” she'd sobbed the night he left, “I can't go on like this.”), when she refused to participate in the investigation because it was too painful for her. He won't accuse her, of course, but he doesn't want to copy her. He can't abandon his son.

“You wouldn't be forgetting him,” Barbara says. “I know you, John. And I haven't forgotten him. Just because I don't let the pain control my life doesn't mean I'm forgetting my son.” Her voice is too rough now, full of pain. A pain that is all too familiar to John.

John rubs his hand over his face, wiping away his tears. “I know you haven't,” he says softly. He doesn't want to have this conversation with her. “Thanks for talking to me, Barb. I'm sorry to bother you.” He reaches up to hang up the phone.

“You need to live your life, John,” Barbara says just before he hangs up. “It doesn't mean you're forgetting Luke. I just want you to be happy.”

“Thank you,” John says softly, and hangs up. He lets the phone fall onto the couch, runs his damp hands through his sweaty hair.  

---

Monica knows a little bit about the man that Mulder and Dana call the smoker. CGB Spender, mystery man, a true B-movie villain. Mulder and Jeffrey Spender’s father. Dana has always described him with an overwhelming ounce of disgust, hatred. She's only gotten bits and pieces of their history with the purported smoker, but it's enough to mutually hate this man she's never met. Who she never will meet, because he’s dead. Or so she thought.

She soon finds herself being summoned to a hospital in New Mexico, a couple of months after Mulder and Dana disappear. The hospital won't tell her why, only that a patient wants to see her and they are insistent that it's important. They won't tell her who the patient is. “I'm afraid I'm going to need more information than that,” Monica says cautiously, not wanting to walk straight into another trap.

“I’m afraid we can't give it to you,” says the man on the other end. He pauses for a second before adding, “But I was told to tell you something.”

“And what is that?” Monica asks.

The man waits a few beats before saying, “I was told to tell you that this is about Dana Scully.”

Monica goes. She doesn't think she has a choice, because that could be Dana or Mulder there in that hospital, needing her help. She doesn't tell John, which is silly, but she was told to tell no one. Dana and Mulder trying to cover their tracks, she thinks. It feels nonsensical, considering the fact that they both know John better anyhow, but she still doesn't tell him. She flies out to New Mexico alone, hearing the thud of her heart in her ears. Even with her worry about Dana and Mulder, she finds that she is almost excited; it's been so long since she did anything outside of routine.

Her worry is clearly not necessary. She realizes this as soon as she gets to the hospital and the men with suits usher her in. It's not Dana or Mulder, and the man in that room doesn't need her help. At least not any help that she is willing to offer.

The smoker lies in the hospital bed, burned nearly beyond recognition, is the man she's seen in old, blurry photos stashed in the X-Files. CGB Spender. The man she'd assumed was dead. She remembers, suddenly, the fireball that consumed the pueblos where they found Mulder and Scully; was he in that?

Monica has no idea how the smoker knows her or how he found her, but he had an offer for her. He wants her to join him, he says, in a plan to reshape the Earth radically. He wants to create a virus to counter the apparent planned alien invasion in 2012. He tells her that very few people are actually immune. He tells her that Dana is one of the few who are. He offers her that same immunity in exchange for her help.

Monica is beyond baffled. Even after everything that has happened to her, she never expected to be offered something like this. An opportunity to go over to the dark side, to betray everything they've been working for over the past year. She's astonished, horrified, repulsed. She bites out some angry words, exits the hospital room angrily and lets the door slam behind her. She would never, ever do anything like that, even to save her own life.

She makes it all the way to the hotel before the implications of what Spender has told her sink in. A virus that will wipe out most of Earth's population. An alien invasion scheduled for 2012. The casualties will be horrifying. Do Mulder and Dana know about this?

Monica sits at the little desk in her hotel room, her head spinning. She can't just walk away from this, she has to do something. She has to stop this because now this is so much bigger than Dana and Mulder and Dana's baby and all the other horrible things she's heard about. This is all of mankind.

All she can think is that she has to do something. She has to tell Dana and Mulder. They're the only ones who would know how to deal with this. She calls Skinner, perched on the end of her bed with a cigarette in hand. (She's trying to quit, and the taste of it in the back of her throat makes her think of fucking Spender, begging for cigarettes on what should've been his death bed, but she needs it now, needs to clear her head.) When he picks up, she blurts, “I need to talk to Mulder and Scully.”

Skinner is silent on the other end for a few beats. And then he's saying, “Agent Reyes?” in confusion.

“Yes, this is Agent Reyes,” Monica snaps, taking a drag on her cigarette. “I need to talk to Mulder and Scully.”

Skinner is silent again, maybe in astonishment. “I don't know where they are,” he says finally.

“It's important, sir,” says Monica, the smoke expelling from her mouth in a thin line. “Incredibly important.”

Skinner's voice goes quiet on the line, hissing into the phone. “I can't exactly discuss this with the level of subtly it deserves on this line,” he whispers. “But either way, Reyes, I don't know where they are. Truly. The most I've heard from them is via postcard.”

Monica bites her lower lip, takes another long, burning drag off of the cigarette. She doesn't know who the hell to give this information to if she can't get in touch with Mulder and Scully. Skinner is the obvious option—more obvious than Kersh, at least, who Monica still has some distrust of, even after he helped Mulder escape—but over the phone clearly isn't the best way to do this. And besides that, Skinner has been tied up with trying to find Gibson a safe place to go. She can hardly ask him to do more.

“What do you need to tell Mulder and Scully?” Skinner asks in a hushed voice on the other end. “Agent Reyes?”

Monica swallows. The cigarette is burning up between her fingers. “I can't say on this line, sir,” she says, and hangs up.

She puts out her cigarette and lights another one. She takes her pack outside and sits on the edge of the pool, feet dangling in the water. The moon is out.

For a split second, she imagines Mulder and Dana driving into this hotel, tired and world-weary. She does something she hasn't done in years, since long before the FBI, and plays out wishful scenarios in her head. She helps Dana and Mulder save the world, kill the smoker, clear Mulder's name and get their son back. (Goddamn, that kid was cute, and Dana missed him so much.) The X-Files are reopened. Luke Doggett is found alive, and John is overjoyed. Monica gets a promotion and a nice fucking apartment and a date and maybe that cat her sister is always telling her to get, and everyone gets a happy ending.

Life isn't a movie and Monica is much too old to pretend. She lights another cigarette.

She remembers Leyla Harrison's eagerness, her constant references to Mulder and Scully and her admiration of them. What would Agents Mulder and Scully do? What would John do? Monica tries to imagine. What would Monica Reyes do? There seems to be only one option, but she doesn't know if it's a sacrifice she should make.

Her feet splash the top of the water. She gives up. She goes in and dials John's number.

---

They catch the killer. Doggett feels like he has done nearly nothing to help. Monica is out of town, and he finds himself missing her, her sunny attitude. She'd find a way to make him feel better.

He keeps coming back to what Barbara said on the phone before, about his job. Staying in careers that remind him of Luke. He likes his job, though; it's like a step up from police work, in the same vein of the military. But it's cases like this that always manage to get to him. That bring back the nightmares, the ghost of his son. If he believed in ghosts, that is.

He's sitting at his desk, fiddling with an Empire State Building snow globe Monica had bought for him in a souvenir shop downtown (the irony—but god, he misses the city) when the phone rings. It's Monica, calling from New Mexico, apparently. “Hey, Mon,” he says with pleased surprise. “What are you doing in New Mexico again? I thought your parents were in Arizona.”

“They are,” Monica says. “I'm on a… case. Sort of.”

“Oh.” Doggett turns the snow globe over in his hand. He's wondering why she didn't invite him. He's wondering if this has to do with Mulder and Scully, who they last saw in Arizona. “What kind of case?”

“It's… complicated,” says Monica in a rush. “Listen, John, would you mind coming down here? I need your help with something. And I don't want to discuss it over the phone.”

Doggett’s mouth tenses in surprise, letting the snow globe fall to the table. “Sure, Mon,” he says, sitting back in his chair. “Everything okay? Are you…”

“I'm fine,” Monica says quickly. “I just… I need you out here, if you can make it.”

“Be there by tonight,” Doggett says.

---

Monica meets Doggett at the airport in Roswell. She looks as if she's deep in thought when he sees her, huge sunglasses falling over her face, an unlit cigarette in her hand. But she smiles as he draws closer and he feels a wave of relief. He doesn't have many friends left after he tanked his reputation on the X-Files, but he has Mon, and he's grateful for that. She'd be the reason he stays at the Bureau, or even in DC, if he stays.

When he hears what Monica has to tell him, it feels like it's all inevitable: Barbara's suggestion, the missing child case, finding Luke's killer, the Files closing. Maybe this is all fated to end.

When Monica finishes, they're parked in the parking lot of her hotel, the sun sinking over the desert. The sunset and the sand seems to give everything a red glow; it's making Doggett's head spin. He says slowly to her, “So this… smoker guy…”

“CGB Spender,” Monica supplies.

“Whatever. So this Spender guy… who just happens to be Mulder and Scully's worst enemy and who, by all accounts, should be dead… wants you to join him?” He shakes his head in disbelief. “And you're actually… considering it?”

“I'm not considering joining him,” Monica says, rubbing at the bridge of her nose. She taps a cigarette absently against her leg. (Doggett recognizes the habit almost fondly from years of meeting in increments, Monica insisting she was trying to quit every single time.) “I'm considering infiltrating him. So I can put a stop to his plans and hopefully save the entire human population.”

“The entire human population,” Doggett repeats slowly. “And you believe this… CGB?”

“John, you've seen what these men can do,” she says. “I have no reason not to believe it. I have no choice.”

Doggett rubs a hand across his mouth tiredly. “And you don't think he won't notice you're a double agent? This sounds dangerous, Monica.”

“Part of the job,” Monica says simply. “And besides that, this is bigger than you and me. We're talking about the world here. The good of all mankind.”

Doggett sighs, looking out to the horizon. Sand stretching out for miles. He can see nothing else. “I dunno, Mon,” he says wearily. “I hardly think the two of us are the leading experts on this shit.”

“Skinner doesn't know where Dana and Mulder are, and I didn't want to bring too much suspicion on him,” Monica says. “And I wouldn't trust anyone else with this information.”

“Good instincts.” Doggett sighs, leaning back in his seat. “I dunno, Monica, I dunno. Do you want me to tell you to do it? I dunno if I can tell you to do it. I dunno if I can tell you not to do it.”

“I have a unique opportunity,” Monica says. “I have the knowledge of what these people do, the horrible things they do, and the smoker has no reason to distrust me. I have an in that even Mulder and Dana don't have.”

He laughs quietly. “Well, it sounds like you've already made up your mind.”

“I don't want to do it,” says Monica. “But I think I have to. For my family, for my friends, for the world. For Dana and Mulder and that poor kid of theirs.”

It always comes back to Mulder and Scully. Doggett wipes his mouth, nods a little in understanding.

“I guess I just want you to tell me I'm doing the right thing,” Monica finishes.

“You're too damn noble, Monica. Of course you're doing the right thing. The question is, what'll it cost you? You'd be going deep undercover, betraying your values. Hell, this could take years.”

“I know,” Monica says. “That's more or less what I signed up for, isn't it?”

“I dunno about that.”

She removes her sunglasses and turns to look at him. Drops her box of cigarettes in the cupholder and gives him a small smile. “I hate to leave DC though,” she says. “Brand new apartment and all. And… I'll miss you.”

Doggett smiles back, just a little. “I'll miss you, too,” he says. “Although you might not believe it, Mon, but… I've been thinking about maybe quitting. This may be an opportunity for both of us to move on, Mulder-and-Scully style.”

“Quitting? I never would've expected that from you, John.”

“Neither did I.” Doggett leans against his elbow, shrugging a little. “But this last case… it really shook me up. I couldn't handle it the way I used to be able to. Couldn't stop thinking about Luke. I called Barb and she… she thinks I should move on.” He rubs his face with one hand, tries to scrub it all away. “Not… forget Luke, but move on. Get away from things that remind me of what happened. Try to be happier.”

Monica watches him quietly, fiddles with her sunglasses absently. “Where would you go?” she asks quietly.

“I dunno. Maybe…” Doggett has a sudden memory, painful and joyful at the same time: Luke on a vacation in Florida they took when he was five. His tanned face grinning up at Doggett where they stand in the water, little hands clutching a fishing pole. It's an oddly happy memory. He wants to hold onto this feeling. “Maybe Florida,” he says. “Get some sun. Get back to nature or whatever.”

Monica smiles again, sunny as the Florida sky. “Sounds pretty.”

“I'm sure it is.”

They sit in silence for a minute, the air conditioner humming. The sun sinks below the horizon.

“So… we're going to do this, huh?” Doggett says finally. “Leave it all behind?”

Monica looks down at her tanned hands, reaches for the package of cigarettes again. “Yeah,” she says quietly. “I guess so.”

---

He buys her a drink, his friend, his partner. One last hurrah. It's some cheesy alien-themed bar that Mulder would probably love. A few drinks in, and he's repeating the sentiment to Monica, and she's bursting into giggles. They stay up too late, drinking and joking and goofing off.

He'll miss her. He really will.

Monica drives him to the airport in the morning, the sunglasses sliding back over her nose. “Practicing your covert routine, huh,” Doggett says at baggage claim, and she says, “Guess so.”

She walks him as far as they can go and stops, the two of them standing in awkward silence. Finally, Monica says, “No one can know what I'm doing. What I'm really doing. Let them think I went evil, that I went off the grid or whatever. Not even Skinner; he's surrounded by too many dangerous people.”

Doggett nods. “What about Mulder and Scully?” he asks. “If I ever see them again?” (He's not holding his breath.)

Monica hesitates before agreeing, “Sure. But only because I never want to be on their bad side. Especially not Dana's; she scares the shit out of me.”

They both laugh at that. And then it is silent again, the awkwardness thick in the air. Doggett fidgets with the handle of his suitcase, unsure of what to say or do. But Monica does it for him; she steps forward and wraps her arms around his shoulders, the way she suddenly hugged him months ago when he'd brought Polish sausage to her apartment. He hugs her back on instinct.

“You call me,” he says into her hair. “You need anything, you get into trouble, and you call me. I'll kill that smoking son-of-a-bitch. Probably get a medal for it.”

Monica chuffs out laughter, kisses his cheek gingerly before drawing back. “I'll keep in touch,” she says. “Somehow.”

“Well, good.” Doggett crosses his arms over his chest.

Behind him, they call his flight. He scoops up his suitcase, somewhat reluctantly, and waves a little to Monica. “You be careful, okay?” he instructs her firmly.

“I will.” Monica grins like she isn't about to do something incredibly dangerous (or stupid) and try to save the world. “You have fun in Florida.”

Doggett nods. Turns and walks towards his gate because he's awful at goodbyes. When Dana had left, packing up her stuff just before they went to break Mulder out, he honestly hadn't known what the fuck to say to her. He's horrible at goodbyes.

He's halfway to his gate when Monica calls out, “Hey, John!” from behind him. He turns. She shouts, “You should get a dog!”

“This wouldn't happen to be a joke about my name, would it?” Doggett shouts back. He's heard it all, ever since preschool, for Christ's sake.

“No, you just always seemed like a dog person to me!” Monica calls.

Doggett chuckles in soft surprise. Goddamnit. He really is going to miss her.

---

Monica drives straight to the hospital from the airport. Attempts to put on the persona that she will unknowingly be sporting for years: cold, unfeeling. She feels like she is doing something too significant, changing her entire life. She tells herself it will be worth it. For Dana and John and her family and all of humanity.

She tells the smoker that she will do it, her face blank, her voice hard. “If,” she adds warningly, “I'm guaranteed immunity. Myself and my family and friends.”

The smoker pulls his charred lips upwards in a snake's smile. “We'll see, Monica,” he says. “A few years with me, and you may find you don't care as much anymore.”

Monica keeps her face hard and neutral. Thinks, I will never be as cold and unfeeling as you, you bastard.

She's about the least equipped for any of this. She has the least amount of experience with this conspiracy, the least tragedy in her life. She has less to lose.

And that, Monica Reyes thinks to herself, is exactly why she has to do it.

---

Doggett gives his two-week notice.

Skinner gives him a strange look, somewhere between confusion and disappointment. (Maybe he likes having reckless X-Files agents around, being in the midst of the action. Or maybe he just really misses Mulder and Scully.) “What's going on here?” he whispers to Doggett privately, later. “Does this have anything to do with Agent Reyes’s own resignation? What the hell are you two up to?”

Doggett says, as innocently as possible, “Sir, I'm moving to Florida. I'd like to start a new stage in my life. And as for Agent Reyes…” He lowers his voice and leans in closer, whispers, “Whatever she's doing, it's important.”

That's the most detailed he'll get. He promised Monica.

He moves down to Clearwater, Florida about a month later. Gets a dog because he promised Monica that, too.

The waves crashing across the street from his crappy little house make him think of his son. They scattered his ashes in the Atlantic because Luke loved the water.

---

Four months later, he gets a letter from Monica. It's short, abrupt, but it says she's okay. It says that she's going to try and stop this. It says she'll be in touch.

Enclosed in the envelope is a postcard from South Carolina.

Doggett burns the letter. The postcard he keeps, puts up on the fridge between the postcard from Dana (Washington State) and the old pictures of Luke, sunscreen smeared over his nose as he smiles into the camera.

[ghostbustermelanieking]

as much as i want to never ever ever talk about the csm as william's dad plot again, i actually have a justification for how mulder is still william's father that fits with canon. under the cut for anyone who doesn't actually want to look at this.

so i wrote a CSM fic last summer (to my deep regret) and a major theme in it, which was based off of canon, was the fact that CSM wants to be a father, and wants a son who respects him. he has some dad issues of his own, since his father was, like, executed in the electric chair. and he clearly is a little obsessed with mulder, possibly because he knew mulder was his son and had to watch him be raised by another man, possibly because mulder was working against him for, like, most of the show. and the show has always sort of shown his dissastisfaction with jeffrey spender, from trying to mold him into his cronie to smacking him around to finally shooting him and "you pale to fox mulder." a habit we know eventually transfers to mulder based off of that final scene in msiv. so he's obsessed with having a son, but he isn't happy with the son's he has. enter william. 

basically, my justification for CSM being william's GRANDFATHER and definitely not his father is based on the idea that he wanted william to replace the son's he already had, and just being his grandfather wasn't enough. who knows if he actually tampered with scully's chip in en ami or if he just said that to make it seem more realistic/boost his own ego? (i choose to believe the latter.) but either way, he sees a potential in william. (maybe that's why jeffrey spender wants to take away william's powers/tells scully to send him away and helps her do it, to protect his nephew from suffering the same fate as him.) 

the visions jackson has in msiv, and the fact that he's never able to communicate with mulder, are the biggest things that make it seem like CSM isn't lying. i have an explanation for that, too. CSM can clearly communicate with william somehow, possibly because of his genetic connection through being hos grandfather, but i think that connection is enhanced because CSM has had experiments done on him similarly to william. how else does he survive a gunshot wound, being thrown down the stairs, and a fucking missile to the face? also, he clearly has an immortality complex--see msii. i think he has similar powers to william, at least in the sense of the visions and clairvoyance, and he uses these to manipulate william so that WILLIAM thinks he is his father instead of his grandfather. i think he blocked whatever jackson used to communicate with scully on mulder's end, so he never was able to see his real father, and i think post ghouli, he himself started to communicate with jackson, hence why he's never mentioned on the ghouli blog. i think he spent years creating this massive lie both so he could manipulate people (skinner, scully, mulder) and so he could have the son he always wanted in jackson. he has a grandson with alien dna and incredible powers, but it wasn't enough for jackson to only be his grandson. 

anyways. i've spent way too much time debunking a plot point i despise, but this is my new headcanon because it makes the most sense from what we know about the show and CSM. and the tagline for MSIII, remember, was I WANT TO LIE.

[ghostbustermelanieking]

your opinion on how s11 should end

mulder, scully, and william beat csm carl to death. as a family.

lol, in all seriousness, i definitely fucking want The Reveal to be debunked. i wish it had never been a plot point in the first place, but oh well.

i'd like csm to die and stay dead. it's ridiculous that he's stayed alive this long, and he's no longer compelling as a villain, to say the least. (i could say a lot more, but i won't.) and i'd like either mulder or scully or both to do it. no outside forces, no syndicate hits, just one of them finally pulling the trigger all these years later. it's time. 

i hope we get to know william as a character. if msiv really is about him, i hope they tell about a good story with him. i want to know that, while he's obviously staying with his parents because they're his parents, that he has something of a relationship with his birth parents and he wants to get to know them better. i want to know that his character is okay, and i want mulder and scully to know he's okay. 

i want mulder and scully to be okay, with each other and as individuals. i don't want them dead or dying or self-sacrificing or abducted. i want them together and i want the knowledge that they're still out there fighting the good fight. i'm fine with ambiguity (ala the truth and not ala msii), but i want to know that they're okay and they're gonna be okay, no matter what. 

justice for monica. also possibly justice for skinman. any and all storyline wrapped up at least a little. and no fucking cliffhanger. there is a wide gap between ambiguity and a cliffhanger, and CC needs to find the spot where it's a good ending but there could also be more (again, ala the truth). i really hope that happens. 

ask me my opinion on shit

[ghostbustermelanieking]

okay but it looks like scully is wanting to find william to prevent mulder from dying when the world ends? (assuming the theory about her imagining msii is true, because it makes a lot of sense based off the promo pics) she says she needs jeffrey spender to find william because mulder's life may depend on it, she says "you need him and i need you" to mulder... oh my God this season is gonna murder me dead she loves him so much

[nostalgicphile]

There was a theory floating around a while ago (I can’t remember who came up with it) that MSII was a dream/premonition that Scully had. That’s why Mulder seems all fine. The “tell me what you saw” line from the new promo would make sense with that theory. That’s why they need to fine William so badly.

Ooooh, interesting theory. So if MSII was a premonition, did the rest of S10 happen? Because I’d be okay to let that whole season go. ;)

Okay, let’s say MSII was Scully’s premonition. It would depend on how far in advance her premonition took place. Would her first thought be to find William and develop a vaccine? Why wouldn’t she be more preemptive than that? Like, say, working with Mulder to prevent the activation of the infection in the first place? Scully would know that CSM is alive…I don’t know. Finding William, exploiting him biologically and attempting to immunize you know, the world, wouldn’t necessarily be the most efficient approach? But, look, give  me ALL the theories.

My guess is that “tell me what you saw” is likely in relation to what Scully saw in the sky or if she were abducted. But I will say that I am very, very curious about all the wig lengths in S11. Something is going on with the timeline and I have no sense of what it all means.

[nostalgicphile]

He didn't, as far as I know, the fandom celebrate him as the epitome of feminism because he wore the pussy hat. Fans make assumptions for CC all the time and he gets the blame for every decision they hate about the show (while everyone else get a free pass, for example the adoption of William, I sent you a link were FS says it was DD first and CC then that wanted him away for the movies) and no credit at all for everything they love about the show. It's always someone else who made TXF iconic!

Okay, so if I understand this correctly: your beef isn’t with David or Gillian - it’s with the fandom? For blaming Chris for everything?

Here is the thing: Chris is still the showrunner. David and Gillian are just the lead actors. Even if David suggested writing William out (I honestly don’t recall the link you are referring to…sorry) it’s ultimately Chris’ decision what’s going to happen with the show and the characters. Also, you can’t say that Babylon, for example or MSII, is anyone’s fault but CC’s. Well, you can also blame Anne Simon…for anything and everything, imo. ;)

Anyway, I could write an entire book on Chris’s relationship with the XF fandom. How deliberately he’s teased us over the years (“We constantly give and take away from the audience”) or how he annoyingly cackled about bringing in Diana or how he thought IWTB was a “love letter” to the fandom and various fans criticized every single aspect of it (even the MSR that everyone was begging for: “’just little something’ sounds like bad fanfic! I hate the way Scully said she loved him like that…”) and how Chris and 1013 see the most dedicated fans who keep the show alive as impossible to please. Though I understand your frustrations - truly I do - the CC/XF fandom relationship is extraordinarily complicated. (Maybe we all need to sit down with Paley Guy and flirt for a couple hours….but somehow I don’t think it would be the same. ;)