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literallyjonathandavis · 3 months ago

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Nirvana rant/vent bc Kurt keeps punching me in the stomach the more I find things abt him to relate to...

tw: slight mention of drugs and suicide

Nah bc when I say my nirvana hyperfixation was one of my most important and influential, I mean it.

Like now my Kurt cobain fixation has passed, and (obviously) I'm on mcr/Gerard way/hesitant alien etc, but one thing that stands out abt my Kurt fixation is that I actually, deeply, almost spiritually found such a strong relation and connection to him and his artistry. Like I can still look and learn new stuff abt him that I can relate to and see myself in and still get fucking heart palpations over the man and that NEVER EVER happened or happens with ANY of my past fixations. Like Melanie Martinez just released a music video yesterday and, yeah I was excited, but it wasn't anything like how I still feel about kurt. Now this COULD be bc he was my last fixation and it could still be lingering as a side fixation but even still I just see myself in this stupid, beautiful, mentally ill dead man so painfully much dude its like crazy.

And I'm not even kidding when I say that we are literally so similar lol it's NOT FUNNY. and Ik that he had problems and that it's kinda concerning that I can relate to someone like that so much but the thing is is that it's not the part of his drug addiction and suicide I relate to. It's his morals, his beliefs, his message, his personality, his art, his style, everything that made him a good person I see myself in. It's like looking in a reflection. Like even my fucking GENDER has been tackled by this mf, like KURT PLS SPARE UR GENDER THE GENDERFLUID AND TRANSMASCS ARE DYING OUT HERE CUH 😭🙏

*Ehem* ANYWAYS yeah but I've never experienced this type of admiration for a singer and it creates a safe haven for me almost to know, even tho I never knew him and he died well over a decade before I was born, I have someone who was on this earth that shares a similar mindset and sense of artistry as me. The same core beliefs, the same energy, I know it's silly but I really love this man and am really exactly like him and it's almost scary...

And this isn't even a matter of "oh I had a hyperfixation and it made me act like this person" no, I've always been this way and thru the beauty of music and art I found a fellow artist who is the same way and it's like an indirect, anonymous bond not only with Kurt and his fans, such as me, but the band in general. NOTHING can break the amazing, gut wrenching, heart tearing, timber shivering, euphoric feeling, bond between a kid and their first rock band, NOTHING. nirvana took who I was, and made me a cooler, more artistic, and let's admit it, more musically educated version of me without ever changing who I am in the core of my existence. Infact they resurrected a part of me, when I was young, my energy from when I was little, my lifestyle, my fashion, my mentality, they dug me out of the mess I became and brought back who I truly was and now am. nirvana showed me actual nirvana, everything abt Kurt and his art relates to my true self and my true morals, it's like I came into existence, and the band saw me and said "that's it, that's the human version of us" and waited till I was ten and came into my life and changed it for the oh so amazing better. again it sounds insane but the band didn't just save me, it MADE ME. It's not a hyperfixation it's a gift from fucking God.

Rock n roll actually saved my soul

They opened me up to rock and roll and without rock I don't know what the fuck I would be doing with my life. I became a better person with rock music, like i said it changed me, but yet kept my core humanity close and safe. I've always been a rocker I just had to find the music.

And 🙄NOOOO🙄I'm not saying I'm like legit the human version of the band and all that weird shi I'm using that as a metaphor for my deep relation to the band bffr 💀🙏

Everytime, yes even after the hyperfixation passed, I see Kurt content I still feel like I'm fixated, not side fixated or anything but like not even a fixation at all it's like this adoration that has been burned into my soul that will never go away. I mean like I said nothing can break the bond of a kid and their first rock band so ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ makes sense lol

And like idk but the whole connection feels almost artistic, not bc nirvana makes music and music is art, well I mean kinda but, it's also just the whole vibe of my emotions is ethereal, metaphoric, artistic, spiritual. I sound out of my mind but the music has driven me insane and for the better, I don't want to be sane. I want to hyperfixate on shit, I want to have deep stomach churning connections with a dead man I never met, I want to embody the insanity of the art, I want to be crazy incoherent cunty rock bitch I am.

It also adds to the lore that my mom has a past with nirvana but that's kinda personal and I won't share that but yeah.

I sound fucking insane but just know some of the stuff I say here is said in a more metaphoric sense than literal. This is just a rant to explain my deep artistic love and relation to Kurt cobain and nirvana <3

BUT YEAH THATS MY ANNUAL NIRVANA YAP 👅👅👅

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iguessitsjustme · 9 months ago

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I Saw You In My Dream Ep 10 Thoughts

I’m behind on this show. I was debating even continuing my liveblog because I am very sleepy and also I have since started my book and now I gotta know how it ends. It took until chapter 4 but now I’m intrigued. Anyway. Reading break so I can eat so I’m catching up on this show. As always, under the cut:

These two are so ridiculously cute. I love them. I sure hope nothing weird happens in this episode.

Noisy sidewalk people go AHWAY.

Oh this other model dude is a creep. Creepy creep creeperston. And Yu is gonna need to save her and that’s gonna cause dumb drama. Where have I seen this before? Oh yeah. Very similar to Love Mechanics which I just binged recently. Do not ask me my thoughts on that show unless you want a whole rant about nothing in particular.

Now Yu. You’re going to explain to your boyfriend that Pan needs a safe place to stay and has nowhere else, right? RIGHT? You don’t gotta tell him why but you can at least communicate that. Right???

YU. Why are you sitting next to your EX and NOT your CURRENT boyfriend?

Honestly, if I were Ai, I’d leave. I would make Yu come after me to explain himself. Somewhere in private. Alas. Ai is a better person than I am I fear.

Noisy sidewalk people go AWAY. Question for my followers that read these: is it impossible to leave a restaurant without yelling? Cause I think it might be impossible.

Ice stop doing the most challenge. Why be a creep when you could literally just go like…read a book or something. I do not understand.

What an evil dream.

But I knew it. The levitating means it’s a dream that represents Ai’s fears and insecurities.

Oh yay we’re getting similar drama for the side couple. Of course it’s just a double dose of jealousy. Why have variety when you can do the same cliche twice in different fonts? I’m yawning. Where’s my book? It’s not something I’d normally choose for myself but it’s more original than this.

Oh my god they’re self aware.

Ice go away. Why is he doing the most to be the worst? See, if I were Pan, I would have posted a picture of the gps tracking device and tagged Ice and said “did you put this in my purse before or after I rejected you?” but again, she’s a better person than I am. Also I’m pretty sure doing that would violate a lot of her contracts. But also someone there needs to call the police what the fuck???

The POLICE. GO TO THE POLICE.

Ice stop breaking into people’s houses challenge. What the fuck is wrong with this man?

Ai’s mom picked up that frying pan and I yelled “Get ‘em girl!” and immediately went into a coughing fit and it seems that’s all the vocal power I had left. Forgot my voice was going out. Worth it. I hope she gets him.

Well that episode was…pointless. Why did that episode exist? Though I would love for a spinoff GL for Pan actually. Give me that? Please?

Anyway on to episode 11. Looks like it’s gonna be…something. Sure. This show doesn’t hurt me nearly as much as others have.

#i saw you in my dream #i saw you in my dream the series #i saw you in my dream series #rae liveblogs #rae liveblogs i saw you in my dream

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theageofsims · 12 days ago

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I'm gonna be completely honest. And it's something I've literally started to type a few times and then I deleted it because in the back of my mind I'm like you gonna finish what you damn well started 😂 , but the reality is -- I honestly don't know the purpose behind recording my gameplay.

It was one thing when I jumped in game to hang with William and Gloria, and it was entirely another thing when I went to check in with Chadwick and Layla (from the same save), but it's like my brain won't allow me to not think of a story.

I spent hours building (building far more than I have in awhile), just to set up my Fugitive save and I'm still 400 screencapa deep because I'm literally taking them all when I'm in the game, but not recording...😂

It's like my mind is telling me to write a story, not just settle for gameplay. Maybe if I had started off the gameplay as a legacy then maybe things would feel different, but I went in knowing I didn't want anything to happen to Jack until I said so meaning aging would be turned off and legacy can't happen without aging (at least in my world).

But I don't know. It's like I find myself building and building and building to only gameplay like bits and pieces and then I'm supposed to move on like no I want him to suffer for 90 chapters, wtf?! 😂

I don't know.

Never in my life did I have a YouTube channel for The Sims or any game. And when I started this, I was only comfortable doing speed builds until I got tired of those. Showing my Lots ended up being something I liked better, but about four months ago I told a friend that I was thinking of doing a gameplay sort of thing and she told me I should give it a try. Me doing speed builds was suggested by another friend. Guess what? Ya girl doesn't really like any of this for too long. 😂 I took their advice and I figured why not give it a try? But I don't know.

It's not even me talking in my videos that makes me nervous anymore like it used to a couple of years ago, but it's like the desire to write stories and show images along with it is stronger than anything else.

This isn't an insult to Sims 4 gameplay either. Of course it suffered a great deal in the beginning years, hence why storytelling appealed to me for the first time in all my years playing Sims -- but I do enjoy the gameplay we have for Sims 4 after its start once packs and mods started to become available and very much so when I started my Powhatan Legacy. But he'll even my legacy that was started and intended to be task based and gameplay ended up being this insane story 😂 it's like why can't I just not do this? I don't know.

Anyway, I wouldn't be surprised if I just reverted the entire Fugitive gameplay to a literal tagged written story on my blog. 😂 As if it never existed in video form because Jack isn't supposed to be happy after losing his wife and the game is like he's happy because he ate a grape. No he fucking isn't -- he's in agony!

Somewhere deep in my mind I know Jack's gonna become part of my Age of Sims save. He's a sim (under all that hair) that I made for the gallery awhile ago and recently I was like I need to get this man somewhere in some save, but where? He ended up in his own, but since episode 2 I was like this dude coming with me and we going to Age of Sims. Pack your shit, Jack, we going! 😂

Anyway -- truth be told through all the exploration I've done with Sims in the past couple of years, I hate it everywhere except for Tumblr. And Tumblr is the only platform where stories can get told, you know what I mean? Every other place it just feels rushed to me and I dunno.

The older I get the more a creature of habit I become, but honestly? I've been pretty set in my ways for years now. Gotta be that deeply rooted old soul in me. Not to mention being an introvert in many ways.

#blurb

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daydream-comet · 2 years ago

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Thats. Thats literally vforce in a nutshell. Like one moment you're howling with laughter and then the next moment you're just like "jesus fucking christ what the actual fuck was that. What were they thinking". Pure cutesy psychological horror (alright that one is a pattern on my part. I have a liking towards cutesy animes which screw with my psyche *cough* madoka, YuYuYu *cough*)

Yea I do feel like vforce was indeed setting up something for zeo but then dropped it (we do know the movie was supposed to be the original opening for s3 before being replaced by grev) and like the only scene we see him after that is like. One frame. In that special final ending. (Though, like I mentioned previously, it seems zeo found some solace in his hobby of playing the violin)

I did read the entire manga and know of the leon/zeo arc. And yep, Zagart's way worse there. Like forcing your younger child to basically swap identities and act like your dead elder child? Sheesh. (Also, funfact: the anime's plotline with Zeo being a robot was supposed to be the original one before Aoki-sensei decided to replace it in the manga, probably due to an editor's recommendation I think?)

Zagart's definetly way better off in the anime. (Also wished they expanded on the beef between him and daitenji. And wow vforce surprisingly gave us daitenji lore. Wow he's a scientist/researcher apparently. Still not very responsible with kids tho.)

Psykick definitely existed just for that. And knowing it was a different organisation working for zagart, without involving zagart, yea. And like it was run by that purple haired weirdo what-was his-name and that crazy old dude.

And yea I've seen uh, questionable stuff, too. Literally walked myself into one too like a naive sweet summerchild. Never should've search for beyblade doujins, thinking I'll get cute wholesome stuff like those touhou doujins. I did find a cute kairei one but that was it. And yea that makes me feel a lot better. Maybe its only my opinion but like sure you can find them pretty and attractive (I literally had a crush on kai and mao/mariah as a kid) but don't.....don't do that...to them? I'll still accept if its like aged up with them being adults and properly tagged. But um, not with minors. That's disgusting. Especially if its non-con. And no, them being 16-17 ish in grev does not qualify on that. And also, *points at the 'asexual' part on my bio*

Oh and please do watch the movie! Its a good watch imo, no cinematic masterpiece but its a good watch nonetheless! I have like a lot to talk about the movie but um, i uh um kinda get nervous about dropping it all in here because um, anxiety disorder that even the internet can't save me from!

OH YEAH :3 i'm curious. what are your favorite parts of v-force/2002? i'm personally big on the digital sacred beasts (or atleast, that plotline from yuya onward, the first 15 eps of the season are kind of a blur to me) and.. ok i can't say zeo's plotline was pulled off Well but i love zeo as a character they are SO fascinating to me.

Well my favorite plotline from the season itself would be Zeo's one, while if we're talking about vforce as a whole then the movie's. The movie had a interesting plotline, and revealed a lot of info about the sacred beasts as well, though not everything was fully disclosed, it seemed they were heading somewhere with it but with grev sorta diminishing the presence of the sacred beasts I think it was dropped. Oh, and the cave scene. I....have a lot of talk about that one, I'm a bit too crazy and delusional about that particular scene to the point it'll need a separate post if its own (if I ever overcome my social anxiety and copy paste everything here)

Zeo is definitely one of my favorite characters in vforce (its the hair that started it I swear I want his hairstyle so bad) and surprisingly he was like one of the things I vividly remembered from my childhood when I was rewatching the series (now that I think about it, my fuzzy memories of beyblade as a child were mostly 60% vforce, 30% season 1 and 10% grev. Mainly because i think i missed a lot of grev as a child when it was airing and mostly caught onto the other two seasons). And yea while i do think if like the writers would've been given more time Zeo's arc along with the other arcs wouldn't have been so rushed, but still i think they did a good enough job, because I was definitely hooked during the final arc. Zeo is also an interesting character to analyse, like he was like first character to give the team a sense of normalcy because throughout the entire season everyone they had met was out for their asses and they couldn't catch a break nor could they have a normal beybattle like they used to without significant consequences. Also wished we got more of Zeo's existential crisis, how it affected and changed him and how he recovers from it and accepts himself (we see in that slideshow final ending in grev with Zeo looking through the window holding a violin. So it seems he found comfort in his hobby). Also that Zeo finding out about his true identity also helped him grow and mature in a sense (a person can't grow up without having to endure hardships, can they?). Like when we see him later on he's stronger and smarter.

Like here Zeo knew exactly what to say to get under Takao's skin (and Takao's emotional attachment to Zeo amplified the impact, along with Takao still trying to grasp as to why Zeo is doing this) and that Zeo is right here in a sense. They didnt interfere due to multiple justified reasons (they wanted to, but couldn't. And even if they did, not much would've changed), but it didn't change the fact that they didn't do anything, and Zeo just rubs some salt on the fresh wound. And in the jp voice acting, while it was faint, Zeo kind of sounded sad when saying "no one will come to help you". If we think about the situation Zeo is in, its....true. no one really can help Zeo even if they wanted to, all they could do was offer words of consolation and comfort. And Zeo was doing all this for self preservation (and I guess daddy issues, Dr. Zagart is....incredibly questionable), but deep down i guess he knew that there really wasn't much he could do to become human, become the 'real' Zeo who died long ago. He just didn't wanted to live his life as a phony, it was all just an act of desperation (just look at him breaking his arm and still going on, isn't that a good example?). And like at the finale while Takao does offer closure to Zeo, the fact remains the same that Zeo can't become someone else and must learn to accept who he is, which he slowly starts to embark on (and if Takao, or anyone really, would've said that earlier it wouldn't have had the same impact, Zeo needed to find his way on his own terms)

And as to the impact Zeo had with his words on Takao, he's literally repeating Zeo's words here and musing over the complicated and conflicting scenario for the majority of the episode while everyone is rightfully shocked to see it coming out of his mouth, not really aware of that little exchange he had with Zeo previously.

All in all I love Zeo, I love the small moments where vforce really gets to shine, I just wished they got more time to expand and explore the entire storyline they were working upon into like two seasons instead of dumping it all into one season. I am, uh, understandably kinda crazy over this show and won't stop overanalysing it. This post is pretty much word vomit and probably doesn't make much sense. Uh. Bye.

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bigboomboi · 4 years ago

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Kindered Sparks

This is my entry for @gg9183’s soulmate collab - Oof, I was almost late for your birthday ( I know that I'm technically no where near late, but I put this out so much later than I would've rathered. Sorry, I'm a Virgo, mate.) Anyhoo! Happy Birthday! And congratulations on your amazing Milestone! Thank you for organizing this collab too and allowing me to be apart of it! Honestly, I love soulmate pieces so much, so I was so excited seeing this prompt (I'm excited to read the others as well!) My friend helped me put together an idea for a SM connection and I really enjoyed writing it, hope you do as well :) Happy reading!

Fem!reader x Denki Kaminari

Soulmates au; People are born with a dream realm connecting them to their Soulmate. Warning; harsh language, Hurt/comfort, pretty fluffy, cursing. Implied readerxfemale relationship. BakuKiri relationship (I got bullied last time I didn't say that was a pairing, so, just being safe)

Word count; 4.6K

“Another lonely night in this stupid world.” Y/N grumbled staring up at her dreamy night sky.

A sky she was supposed to share with someone else.

In this wonderful, bittersweet world, you were tied to another person. Destiny decided from day one of your birth who you’d be with for the rest of your life and then set you in a special plane of existence only accessible when you fell asleep, once you turned the ripe age of fifteen. The kindred-plane.

A place specially made for you and your soulmate to meet each night when you fall asleep. It was a place to get to know each other without the prying eyes of all those around. A shared dream land you could even decorate and make your own. It was your partner’s and your safe space.

It was a place you guys could explore together, where your imaginations combined like an amazing world of minecraft. Some people made completely different lives in their heads at night. Others used it to see their long distance lovers. Hell, there was a blog story sharing what sounded like a whole scripted tv show where a woman’s soulmate had set off to save her from an uncompromising kingdom.

Sadly though, your shared safe space could be destroyed in a matter of moments. It wasn’t unheard of for your soulmate to reject destiny’s plan and divide your dreams. You could absolutely reject your soulmate and quite literally lock them out of your dreams. All presence of them would disappear from your dreams within a few nights, sometimes even faster, and you’d be left alone with only your creations.

Of course, being divided from your soulmate hurt. But something hurt much worse.

Your soulmate being unintentionally stolen from you. A divide where you lose your soulmate despite neither saying they’d like to divide. A situation where your soulmate dies.

Y/N sighed at the reminiscent of her once was soulmate. So sweet and kind, someone Y/N fully imagined meeting one day in the daylight. Yet, now at the sad age of seventeen, Y/N had no dreams of ever seeing her soulmate ever again.

She only had the one year of memories they made…

“Class, This Y/N. She will be joining our class for her final year of hero training, treat her well.” Aizawa introduced her to the class of 3-A.

“Thank you, Sensei” Y/N bowed slightly. “Nice to meet you all.”

Not even a moment of silence was granted before the class erupted in questions. Half about her quirk, the other half about where she was from. A few off hand questions about why she transferred. All a mess.

“Enough!” Aizawa shouted, hushing the entire class. “You all can get to know her later, on your own terms. For now, Y/N please take your seat.”

Y/N nodded and scurried back to the only free seat in the back. Between a pretty pinkette and sweet looking round faced brunette. Before she was even seated, Aizawa began his lesson.

Y/N quietly sat through the classes of her day, ignoring the judging looks aimed her way, as the new girl. She could hear the quiet whispers going around, speculating what type of person she was and tried to ignore those as well. She was well aware of the fact that she appeared very off-standish.

Dark eye bags, complete resting bitch face that quite literally screamed ‘I will stab you with a pencil if you speak to me’, earbuds tucked into each ear and a hunched over form that could rival Quasimodo. Thankfully, the aura she set into place actually warded off her new classmates for several days.

Up until a week later in the common room where her bubble was invaded.

She didn’t look up at the person sitting next to her and subtly tried to turn up her music. She felt the presence of several others join her and they all stared at her silently until finally, the pinkette she sat next to on her first day, plucked her book from her hands. Y/N slowly looked up at her dully and raised an eyebrow.

She reached out for her book, but the girl pulled it back out of her reach. She tried again, reaching forwards further, but the book was yoinked by a strip of tape, pulling it across the coffee table. Gritting her teeth slightly, Y/N stood up to reach across the table and the music in her ears paused.

The girl had unplugged her headphones.

“You just have no regard for personal belongings of others, hm?” Y/N sighed, sitting down.

“We just want to get to know our new classmate!” The pink girl grinned. “I’m Mina!”

“Hi, Mina. Now give me back my shit.” Y/N tried to grab her phone, only for someone behind her to tug her ear buds away. “Seriously?”

“We’ll give you back your things if you let us get to know you.” Mina smiled.

“Or, you could just give it back.” Y/N tried to grab her earbuds from the bright blonde behind her.

“Nope.’ He said, a grin on his face as well. “I’m Kaminari Denki, nice to meet ya, beautiful.”

Y/N sighed and rolled her eyes. “Or, I could just take my stuff back.”

“You could but there’s five of us and one of you, good luck.” A bitch faced blonde mumbled, flipping through her book.

“Fine. Here’s one thing about me.” Suddenly she appeared behind the bitch blonde and snatched her book. Another one of her appeared behind the one who taped her book away and grabbed her book mark. Two other Y/N’s came into existence on opposite sides of her seating couch to grab her phone and ear buds. All while the original Y/N sat in her place. “Don’t touch my things.”

“Woah, you can make multiple you’s!” The redhead gasped excitedly. “That’s so manly!”

“That’s so cool! They feel so real!” Kaminari said, poking the side of the one near him. It yelped and swatted his hand.

“They are real! Don’t poke me, I’m ticklish!” Y/N snapped, rubbing her side.

“Woah, can you feel this?’ The tape one reached out to pinch the clone’s arm.

Y/N’s other clone smacked him with her book. “Yes, I can feel that! Ow!”

“So your quirk is duplicating yourself? Boring…” Bitch face rolled his eyes, another Y/N appeared behind him and swatted the back of his head.

“My quirk is omni-replication. I can create continuous versions of myself and others. But they can act on their own.” Y/N sighed, bringing herself her book.

“Woah, make another me!” Kaminari grabbed her arm.

“G-Get off of me!” Y/N shoved him away, ignoring the literal spark between them. “I can’t make one of you now!”

“But you just said-.” Mina tried.

“I have to know your ins and outs. Otherwise I’d just make a weird melty blob of you.” Y/N sighed. “I need to know more about you guys before I can make you. I need to know you, how you fight, how your quirk works, I need to know how to play the game before I can participate.”

“So, what I’m hearing is…” Mina smirked. “You need to get to know us to succeed.”

“Oh god…” Y/N groaned. “I have no choice in this do I?”

“We have a specialty of making friends with people that don’t want to be friends.” The red head threw his arm over bitch face’s shoulder.

And thus a new friendship was born.

“Bakugo, why do you keep moving my pillow in our dreams, it’s so not manly.” Kirishima whined.

“Neither is the massive rock sitting in the middle of nowhere, dude.” Bakugo argued.

“It’s not just a rock.” Kirishima mock sniffled. “It’s a boulder.”

Y/N snickered at the reference that earned the kind redhead a smack to the back of his head. “Are you delivering pizza on it?”

“Yes!” Kiri grinned.

“No! Don’t encourage him!” Bakugo shouted.

“Aye, don’t shout at me. Your boyfriend is a literal rock, he’s encouraging himself.” Y/N laughed, throwing a fry at him.

“Oh yeah, what trash has your soulmate cluttered in your dream world?” Bakugo argued back.

Y/N’s laughter silenced and immediately her lips curled into a scowl. A light switched on and they remembered the one rule they had set in place. No one talks about Y/N’s soulmate. Or lack thereof.

“Bakugo!” Mina snapped.

“Shit, I didn’t-.” Y/N didn’t give him the time to apologize and stood up from the lunch table.

“Wait, no, Y/N! He didn’t mean to!” Kaminari grabbed her arm.

She flicked him in the forehead and pulled away. “No, it’s fine. You guys talk about your soulmate shit, I’m going to the training field.”

“Wait, Y/N, really!” Mina tried. “It’s just, we’re so used to casually talking about it!”

“I don’t care if you guys talk about yours, but you know I don’t have one, so we don’t bring up mine!” She huffed, before taking a breath. “You know what? Never mind.”

Y/N ignored her friend’s protest and stomped out of the dinning hall. She rushed to the training area, stopping by the locker room to change and grab gear, briefly.

Activating her quirk she began fist fighting her clone, taking her anger out on herself. Very early on into her friendship with the group she told them she didn’t want to talk about the soulmate shit. At least not her own. She told them she didn’t have one, leaving them to believe she never did.

They were incredibly understanding after they found that it upset her. So much, to the point that she copied Kirishima to punch himself when he kept asking. After that ordeal and several days of being ignored, they respected her wishes of not bringing it up.

She knocked herself down and punched herself in the face. She turned off the connection to the clone so she wouldn’t feel the pain herself. Disconnected clones only had a few minutes to live really and faded away with enough damage. Once that one faded, she created another in its space and continued pounding away.

“Stupid soulmate bullshit.” She huffed each word with a punch. “Stupid divide rule.” Another clone. “Stupid. Fucking. Erg- Everything!”

Y/N beat her final clone to death and didn’t bring a new one out. She sniffled, the tears she’d been holding back for years now finally breaking her dam. She hated the horrible lonely feeling she had been surrounded by for so long. She missed out on so much sleep, just to avoid going to her dream world. She set alarms to wake her up every hour or so to stay away from it and at this point, she was losing her mind.

She cried more thinking back to the last time she had been in her kindred-plane. She’d avoided it for a few days before exhaustion actually hit her like a bus and made her sleep. This time her plain little dream seemed to have adopted new items in her absence.

A bundle of comic books, a guitar, even a really, really big pikachu plushie.

Not that they were placed anywhere in particular. The guitar was outside of the little home she had reimagined, laying haphazardly on the ground. The pikachu was placed in front of a tree, facing it and the books were strewn across her loveseat couch. It was like her dream realm had become a lost and found for thrown away items from other planes. Which, honestly, Y/N could believe, as she didn’t use it so much.

She wished she could just give away her realm and dream of nothingness.

“Y/N?” She jumped, hearing her name and quickly wiped away her tears, ignoring the way they stung her open knuckles.

“Kaminari, I’m not really in the mood to talk.” Y/N muttered.

“Okay, that’s fine. We both know I talk enough for the both of us.” He joked, coming to sit in front of her.

Y/N turned to look away from his seating and ignored him, but he set off into a spiel about a new game he got. He did what he did best when one of his friends were upset, he talked. And normally that worked, but minutes into his yabbering, she started crying again.

“Hey, no! No crying! Crying is sad!” Kaminari tried.

“I am sad Kami!” She snapped. “I am really fucking sad! Everyone gets to have stupid fucking soulmate but me! And all because mine fucking died!”

Kaminari immediately paused his frantic attempts to calm her. “Huh, I thought you said you didn’t have one?”

“I don’t because she died! My god damn soulmate died literally months after meeting each other damn it!” Y/N yelled, sinking her fingers into her hair. “And now my kindred-plane is empty and lonely and shit keeps getting piled into it like a fucking trash can!”

Kaminari was silent for a moment while she cried. He slowly crawled over, closer to her and pulled her into a hug. This wasn’t a moment for talking randomly and he knew that. So they sat for the rest of the lunch period in silence, save for her soft hiccups.

After that, somehow, Y/N started talking to her friends the next day. She rationalized that it wasn’t their fault she was sensitive about the subject, they didn’t deserve the aggression. So with a tense apology, she was back to sitting with them at lunch and hanging out.

Y/N was determined to not let her disrupted dreamland destroy her outside reality.

“Okay, really?” Y/N blinked at the ugly rug that appeared draped over her bookshelf. “How the hell did you even get there?”

She tugged it down and stared at it in disgusted contemplation. “Guess you get to go in front of the fireplace…”

Y/N walked towards the warmth and paused, noting that it felt like it took a few more steps than usual. She looked around and found that the picture she carefully centered on the wall was no longer centered. Was her house getting bigger? More and more shit was popping up out of nowhere and her place felt spaceyer…

“What the actual fuck universe?” Y/N furrowed her eyebrows and laid down the new rug.

An odd whooshing noise sounded behind her and she turned around to see a lamp fizzled into existence, a hand accompanying it this time. Y/N fumbled over own feet trying to hurry and grab it. Someone was putting shit in her realm and she was about to find out who.

Actually she wasn’t.

The moment she grabbed the hovering wrist, it was like she had rubbed her socks across her new rug a million times and then touched an outlet. The hand shocked her, hard. She yelped and fell backwards on her butt, accidently taking the lamp down too, except when it fell apart it fell backwards toward the floating hand and disappeared from her plane.

Y/N gasped sitting up out of her bed, the shock kicking her out of her own dream. “Ow, what the hell?”

Y/N looked over at her clock, finding that it was five in the morning. She sighed and climbed out of her bed, grabbing her ear buds and phone. There was no school the next day, it was Saturday so she aimed to sneak down to the common room and spend her day dead on the couch, fighting off sleep again.

Not ten minutes after snuggling into a comfy spot on the couch, it dipped slowly as someone sat on the other end of it. She looked up from her book, to find Kaminari on the other end. He held up a bag of doritos in exchange for her company.

“What are you doing up?” She asked, pulling out her ear buds.

“Got startled awake by something in my dream world.” He answered, holding the bag out to her.

“Ah, that sucks.” She hummed apologetically.

“What about you?” He asked carefully.

Y/N snorted. “Kami, you know I don’t sleep.”

“Yeah, I know, but you’ve been up for the past few days.” He sighed, remembering seeing her in the kitchen at three am. “You’re going to trash your health if you don’t sleep.”

“Eh, it’s alright.” She crunched on a chip, before yawning. “Plus, you stay up every night gaming, bite me.”

“Gladly.” He winked. “But seriously, a lonely dream realm can’t be all bad.”

She raised an eyebrow at him, wondering if he was going to continue this topic of conversation. And he did. “I mean mine’s pretty lonely and I think it’s alright.”

“What?” She furrowed his eyebrows.

“My kindred-plane has but just me since like, forever, and I don’t think it’s that bad.” He shrugged.

Kaminari didn’t have a soulmate? That didn’t make sense, he’d tell them about all the adventures he’d run on in his dream. “You said you were helping some Jill girl fight zombies and stuff, just the other day.”

“Yeah, Jill Valentine. From Resident Evil.” He laughed. “I figured out a long time ago that I could just make her up in my dreams if I played the game until I fell asleep. She’s not my soulmate-.”

“You don’t have one…” Y/N whispered, sitting up.

“Nope, never did.” He offered her more chips, but Y/N just looked at him with sad eyes.

She cried in his arms about her soulmate dying and it turned out he never had one in the first place. “Don’t look so sad, Sunshine. It’s okay.”

“Denki, you don’t have a soulmate. That shit sucks.” Y/N flailed her hands.

“Yeah, but at least I didn’t get attached to mine and then they died. That sucks even more.” Kaminari argued.

Y/N slumped back against the couch. “This soulmate business is quite literal shit.”

“Yeah, but other people are pretty happy with it, so it’s okay to me really.” Kaminari hummed, nonchalantly. “Plus, no one can yell at me for my taste in decorations. That can really make or break a relationship ya know.”

Y/N laughed. “Oh yeah, totally. If my soulmate tried to decorate our space with half the shit that seems to appear in my room I’d have to throw hands.”

“Stuff appears in your dream?” Kaminari asked. “What, like, someone’s statue of Scooby doo?”

“Kaminari Denki, please tell me you don’t have a statue of Scooby doo in your kindred.” She tried not to laugh.

“No!” He said quickly. “I have a statue of Scrappy Doo.”

“Oh my god, no, you don’t!” She gasped.

“Yep! There’s a pond in front of my house and he’s in the dead center of it.” He grinned proudly. “And he looks amazing there.”

“Oh I bet he does.” Y/N snickered. “Bet he pulls the whole place together.”

“As a matter of fact he does.” Kaminari declared smugly. “What about your plane? What’s one big special thing you’ve got in it?”

Y/N hummed and thought for a second. “There’s a really big oak tree just behind my house and it’s covered in string lights, with a small ladder up the trunk. There’s a flat area in some of the branches so I can sit up there and read.”

“That sounds beautiful.” Kaminari said, fondly. “I have a tree kind of like that in mine too.”

“Does yours have a massive Pikachu in front of it?” She taunted, laughing.

She just barely missed the furrowing of his eyebrows before he answered. “I’m not entirely sure, I think, I’d have to take a look. I hope I do though, otherwise, I’d have to come steal yours.”

“Absolutely not! He’s my friend!” Y/N gasped and shoved at his leg. “Stick with your Scrappy Doo statue.”

Kaminari smiled. “Fine, fine. But if I don’t have a Pikachu in my dream, you owe me.”

“Mmhm, sure.” Y/N grinned.

For the next few months, Y/N and Kaminari grew closer, having bonded over their lack of soulmates. While they grew closer, not only did Y/N become happier, her kindred-plane seemed to get brighter, despite all the random things finding purchase in her realm and the fact that it was still growing. It was nice, she didn’t hate spending the night there anymore. She didn’t run into the disembodied hand anymore, but that was okay.

With what was happening in reality, she wasn’t too bothered by her dreams anymore. Instead, she focused on her friends, they were a wonderful reminder that life didn’t go to complete shit. For the first time, she actually let these people get close to her and drag her out of her hole she kept herself in.

… And out into the living room to watch the boys yell at each other over Mario Kart.

Y/N cursed and pushed Kaminari’s face away from her own as he laved his tongue across her cheek. “Denki, I swear to god if you don’t stop licking me, I’m going to bite you!”

“Ooh! Promise?” He flirted, smirking. “What else are you gonna do with that mouth?”

“Hurt your feelings, Sparkler boy.” She laughed, squishing his cheeks.

Kaminari threw himself into her arms, taking her to the floor. “So mean, I thought you loved me!”

“Oh yeah, she totally loves you with the way she made you beat yourself up today.” Bakugo snickered.

“Yeah, dude, she used your quirk against you better than you.” Kirishima pipped up.

“Hey, hey, clones don’t get fried when they use their ultimate! They just disappear and another one pops up!” Kaminari argued in defense.

“Jesus, Denki, you’re heavy!” Y/N shoved at his body, half heartedly. “Get off, you loser.”

“Uhg, fine, only because I have a race to win.” He rolled off her, to grab his switch controller.

“Oh thank god, I was going into the light for a second there.” Y/N gasped, dramatically.

Kaminari pinched her leg in retaliation. “Hey, I’m not that heavy!”

“Your head is though.” She stuck her tongue out.

“So mean.” He pouted as she turned to lay her head in his lap.

Y/N giggled as she pulled out her phone, to scroll through Tumblr for a fic to read. Moments went by before a snapchat notification popped up. Tapping on it, she found a common message from Mina.

‘You guys are too cute.’- Pinkiepie

‘We’re just friends, Mi.’-Y/N

A snap picture appeared in their feed and she tapped it open. There she was laying in Kaminari’s lap and there he was looking down at her, sweetly. ‘He’s giving you major heart eyes.’- Pinkiepie

‘Stop taking pictures of people, it’s stalkery.’- Y/N

‘That’s why you took a ss.’ -Pinkiepie

‘Oh fuck off.’- Y/N

‘Oh come on, just give him a chance, neither of you have sm’s so your not stealing him from anyone.’- Pinkiepie

‘You’re*’- Y/N

Y/N sighed and looked up to Kaminari’s face above hers. It apparently hadn’t been uncommon knowledge that Kaminari was Soulmateless, probably why the group had been so confused as to why she was so upset about it. It was normal to them, because it had always been Kaminari’s story.

Would it be so bad to make her own soulmate? Most divided soulmates stayed by themselves for the rest of their lives, but would it be alright if they didn’t?

“Oh, guys! I meant to tell you; I think I actually do have a soulmate!” Kaminari blurted into the air.

His admission quite literally derailed the entire room. Bakugo drove off the map in Mario Kart, Kirishima completely looked away from the game and Mina choked on her spit and her eyes flew to Y/N who paled significantly.

Sero was the only one who appeared unaffected. “Guys, he’s probably just saying that to throw us off, he’s in last.”

“I’m gonna blow you up, you put me in fourth with your little stunt.” Bakugo threatened.

“No, I’m serious!” Kaminari argued. “Over the last few months my dreams have been changing and stuff. Like it was making room for another person. My house is super spacy now, new decorations have been showing up for no reason, like there was a vase of flowers on the floor near my door, and my curtains changed colour, they’re a cute lavender colour now. Plus there’s a really big pikachu next to a beautiful oak tree in my yard.”

“Woah, dude, really?” Kirishima paused the race and turned to his friend.

“Yeah, totally.” Kaminari nodded, subtly looking down to meet Y/N’s wide eyes. “I was super confused for a while.”

“Holy shit, you’re serious.” Sero laughed. “Have you met them yet? Or are they just leaving surprises for you?”

“Well, I’ve seen her a few times, but I haven’t got the chance to talk to her yet, she wakes up pretty fast.” Kaminari shrugged.

“That’s so good Denki, I’m so happy for you.” Mina said softly as Y/N sat up.

“Me too, Denks. But speaking of waking up, I’m tired, so I’m gonna go take a nap.” Y/N hummed, yawning.

“Okay, see you later, Y/N.” They all chimed as she walked away.

“Yeah, see you later.” Kaminari called, carefully.

Y/N tried her best to contain herself and all but ran to her dorm. Along the way, her phone buzzed, no doubt a message from Mina. Once she was in her room, she flew to her bed, never had she been so eager to fall asleep before.

She quickly responded to Mina, ensuring her that she was alright and actually wanted to sleep. Y/N even sent her a reassuring picture of her smile with a short caption ‘I’m off to go see a Pikachu.’ After that, it didn’t take long for her to fall asleep, but it was too long.

Y/N blinked open her eyes, finally appearing in her kindred-plane and spun around, trying to identify things in her dream house. She hurried to open the door and looked over to her tree, with the ever so famous Pikachu there. She turned and jogged in the opposite direction for the one thing she needed to see to make sure she was correct.

There it was. Scrappy Doo. In the middle of her pond.

Y/N jumped up and down, squealing to herself. It was happening, oh my god, it was happening. Now she just had to wait.

And wait she did. She had run back to her tree and climbed up to sit and await her soulmate. The soulmate she actually had again. Someone to share her dream world with again.

She had a soulmate.

Quietly for the next hour, Y/N sat and read one of her books, waiting almost patiently for him. She’d made it through the third chapter when a voice startled her away from the pages.

“Sorry, I couldn’t fall asleep for the life of me.” Kaminari said, smiling.

Y/N bit her lip and grinned. “I thought you missed my cue for a bit there."

"No, I was just a little too excited to fall asleep." He crawled up into her tree nook. "You see, I suddenly got a new person roaming my world almost like, uh, a forever person or something. What's it called?"

"Mm, I don't know. Kinda sounds like you've got a soulmate there, Denki." Y/N whispered as he came closer.

"Fucking finally." He muttered, leaning forwards to connect their lips.

But before he could make contact he ran into her hand first. “But, really, we are going to have to talk about your decorating choices.”

“Yeah, yeah, we can talk about that after this.” Kaminari chuckled and moved her hand to kiss her.

#mha soulmate au #denki kaminari x reader #denki kaminari #bnha denki #bnha x reader #mha oneshot #bnha oneshots #fem reader #female reader #bi reader #pan reader #reader is attracted to multiple genders #gracies soulmate collab #soulmates au

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capricorn-stark · 4 years ago

Text

Protégé

pairing: red hood!jason todd x robin!reader, slow burn

warning: swearing

a/n: for context, this is somewhat loosely based off of Battle for the Cowl (2009) which I definitely recommend as a read!

There was something about falling that you would never, ever get tired of.

Ever.

Probably.

With the wind whistling in your ears, your hair floating up in a million directions, and your limbs seemingly weightless as the buildings and lights blurred into one endless streak of color, the rush of adrenaline that ran through your body right before your grappling hook shot out and you landed quietly on the concrete was about a million times better than any sparring session back at the cave.

You grinned as you straightened, rather proud of the fact that you had actually managed to land so smoothly without nearly paralyzing yourself. Again.The landing was something you had been working on for a while now.

You could practically hear Bruce’s voice ringing through your head after your little stunt, lamenting on and on about how you had more important things to focus on during patrols, and you let out a sigh as you ran down the backway of the nearly empty streets.

The heavy man who had been bound up with a decently made gag and one of Bruce’s fancy tech pieces (Batcuffs, maybe? Something else with Bat smacked in front of it?) grunted beside you.

“What? Not like you had someplace to be.” You grabbed the back of his rather tacky-looking spandex suit to drag him along back to where your mentor was supposed to be.

Despite your (many) disagreements and his (many) criticisms of your hand-to-hand combat skills, attitude issues, and pretty much everything else relating to you, Bruce had actually still allowed you to go off on your own tonight. It might’ve been because he wanted a few hours of nothing but beating up petty criminals by himself for stress-relief, it might’ve been because he had started trying out that whole independence thing with you a little more (even though you were still only permitted to be about five blocks or so away), it might’ve been plot-convenience - but either way, you appreciated the gesture.

It didn’t take long for you to pull your new friend over to what should’ve been your rendezvous point with Batman, letting the man drop with a dull thud and a grunt of protest against the concrete as you glanced around for the other man. You weren’t particularly concerned by the fact that the Bat himself wasn’t there yet - after all, he was the goddamn Batman. He’d show up eventually. In the meanwhile, you decided to go over the information you had gotten on the criminal with you.

Just for the sake of it. Bruce would make you go over it anyways.

“Drury Walker, thirty-two years old, found him trying to mug someone in a back alley and make an escape. Called himself…” you paused, looking down at his sorry-looking outfit for a few moments while he looked up at you with murder and vengence in his eyes. “...Killer Moth.”

“Killer Moth?” A completely new voice repeated in disbelief, causing you to immediately whirl around to face them in a fight stance, heart racing at a million miles per hour. The guy in front of you had his hands up in the air, his face concealed with some sort of red knock-off Iron Man helmet. He was gonna get copyrighted by Marvel Studios. “Shit, sorry,” he started at the sight of you, still leaning up against one of the walls. “I was supposed to make a wholeass dramatic entrance, but you said his name was Killer Moth and that-” The man made a noise that was either a sharp cough or a laugh of some kind. “-sounded so fucking lame I couldn’t help myself.”

Despite the fact that you were definitely in some sort of major trouble with this new guy, he really did have a point. Even Killer Moth himself would’ve been embarrassed by how trash his name was, if not for the fact that he looked like he was on the verge of an aneurysm - understandably so, since the new guy had produced not one, but two guns out of apparently nowhere.

“And let me guess,” he continued, pointing one of them at your head, his tone still all-too light and easy. “You must be the Bat’s brand-new Robin.”

Now this is where most people would've shut up and proceeded to be complicit with the dude holding two guns. But Batman hadn’t seen reason and made you his (sort of) partner because you were like other people. Hell no.

“Do I look like a traffic signal to you?” It had been the very first of your amendments with Bruce. You would not be fighting crime looking like a literal traffic signal or, at best, a clown from Haly’s Circus. And the tiny green shorts had to go. “Or Robin Hood?” The guy had a rather awkward pause where his gun sort of dipped. Killer Moth was looking between you with wide eyes. “Do I?”

“I guess you kinda got a point.” You huffed and he raised his gun again, getting more in-your-face as his already angry-looking helmet somehow managed to look angrier. You weren’t exactly sure how a helmet could convey so much emotion. “But you work with Batman. And I heard you went by Robin.”

Okay, so you couldn’t make him change the name, but you had agreed it would be more of an honorary thing.

“It’s complicated.”

Using such a phrase as an excuse to escape from situations you didn’t want to go into was one of the many things you had learned from Bruce in your five months of training. Somehow, that seemed to trigger the guy further.

“So you do work with Batman.”

Before he could do something actually insane, you had managed to push the gun pointed at your head away from you, using his brief second of surprise to take it out of his hands, kick him in the chest, and round back on him with it in hand.

“And what about it?”

As cool as you thought you might’ve sounded didn’t cover for the fact that you were still nerve-wracked about what was happening right then. Especially after the guy started to dramatically slow-clap like some sort of evil thespian in a high school drama.

“Not bad, Robin. Not bad.” He looked at the gun in your hands and grinned. “If you weren’t Batman’s new replacement sidekick, I might’ve believed you had the balls to use that thing.”

Now, you were an excellent fighter. You had to be, after your excessive training with the guy who had literally mastered about every martial art in existence during his (give or take) five year-long mission to find himself. Plus, some personal experience. But fighting someone like this guy? Built like a tank and padded up in a whole lot of armor and packing an assortment of knives, guns, and even a damn taser you got a first-hand taste of?

You fought hard, but about five minutes and another round of the taser later, you saw the knock-off Iron Man helmet staring down at you before the world went black.

~*~

You woke up in what you assumed was the self-dubbed Red Hood’s safehouse of sorts.

“How the hell did he rope you into this shit?” he demanded with what you could only assume was him glaring at you through the helmet. Probably some expression that made someone look all angsty and annoyed - which was fair, since he had been trying to drill you for information you straight up refused to give while bound (way too tightly) to a chair for quite some time now. Rather rude. “Let me guess. You watched your parents die.” You stared at him before shrugging.

“Nope.”

“Oh, so they just went ahead and died somehow. Untimely accident caused by some psycho bitch in a Spirit Halloween costume.”

“…nope.”

“They abandoned you as a child.”

“No, they didn’t - does divorce count?”

Red Hoodlum’s hands kept clenching and unclenching while he stood there, staring at the wall behind you in silence. From the way his chest kept rising and falling, you were tempted to believe he was practicing breathing exercises amidst his rather violent twitching.

“Divorce - what the hell is your trauma supposed to be? Why did he pick you?!”

“Hey, just because my trauma doesn’t include people dying doesn’t make it any less traumatic,” you scoffed in response, knowing you were absolutely right about that. Your middle school guidance counselor had said so (and it’s true, ladies and gentlemen, trauma comes in many forms!). “Kinda rude to assume it didn’t affect me somehow.”

He seemed rather abashed at that and you heard him clear his throat a little.

“...right, yeah. Sorry.”

“Apology accepted - can you loosen these ropes a little? It’s starting to kinda hurt.”

“Do I look ten? That’s the oldest trick in the book, I’m not gonna-”

“I’m not going to run, just loosen the ropes a little.” He still looked like he didn’t believe you. “Come on, I don’t think I can outrun your guns.” As in his literal array of guns tacked up to the wall behind him, not his gigantic biceps.

And you weren’t too worried about being held hostage by him, either. You figured you had ten minutes tops before Batman burst in through the doorway, ready to give you a lecture on why straying from the specifically designated parts of Gotham he had let you traipse around was a terribly stupid idea.

“No.” He was already walking towards the door, because apparently, he had enough of trying to interrogate you.

“Hold on, I feel like my wrists are actually about to start bleeding or something - where are you going?”

“Keep talking and I’m gonna get the duct tape.”

“Is that a threat?” Sounding more confident than you actually felt should eventually make you more confident. Eventually.

The Red Hood sucked in a breath, stopping by the doorway and turning to face you, reaching into his pockets to get what you assumed was either a gun or duct tape when you both startled from a sudden crash. The man in front of you was already whirling around with two guns positioned to shoot when you heard the familiar voice of someone else.

“Hold your fire, soldier. I’m not here for you.” A pause. “Or I wasn’t, but now I kind of am.”

Apparently, Batman was too busy to save you. Now, you got Nightwing.

And as much as you liked Nightwing, that still kinda stung.

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benevadeca · 3 years ago

Text

PART 2 REWATCH LB BABY HERE WE GOOO

like this wasn't the part that fucked me up the first time :) it'll be fine

1st shot of the dumpster has the sewing machine but it also already has one of that green container of the insecticide he used to try and get rid of the bugs/poisoned himself with. the unending nature of suffering

the very first scene we have him trying to pick up a weight but it being vastly too heavy for him (12 lbs) and then going for the lighter one (4 lbs) but still struggling but unwilling to yield on it. like wow congrats i already know this guy

his 2 tabs open on his fucking mac being lighting for the house and an expensive speedboat. rly mixing work and play there huh bud. also the very Out There over the top everything of his decisions....like bro i KNOW this guy

also what is this i googled it but it's apparently something injected for some kind of Serious Medical Condition(TM) and also not for heartburn like the packaging says?? sir....

the technology giving the illusion of human interaction but without any substance....all his calls being buisness calls (the namedrop of "derrick" kitchen and "erika" bank) and economists having a dialogue on the radio and

the initial bugs being just 2 of them....hhhhhh

OH MY GODD the place the oven is is where the fireplace used to be. you're KILLING me

his many many piling up coffee cups, the cluttered workspace (both in the basement and during construction) compared w/ the barren fishtank w/ the fish he isn't feeding (the fish ofc being the metaphor for his self care)

going to bed w/ the light on and dropping the phone, all his excersize gear everything he does being so so performative in an attempt to mold himself to a lifestyle. anyway he's basically the protagonist of shark tale

the way the chandelier makes the rat portrait look like it has a crown. ugh imagery.

the bugs first major appearance being when he's on the phone with "sweetheart" for the first time/him eating. sick behavior twisted behavior.

OK WAIT also the convo going "i told derek i just saved myself 3000 pounds. (pause) yeah PISS OFF is what i said to him" GOD with the flow of the convo it's quite possible his dentist on the other side literally told him to piss off but he's so in his own world about everything he just takes it in stride. killing me.

THE AI VOICE LIKE. the framing of the fur beetle screen w/ the < Overview button pointing to him, and the camera unfocusing from the computer screen to him at the line "What do fur beetles look like? What types are there?"

him taking care of the bugs on his own and at first you think it's his "i need to save money" thing from when he laid off the construction workers and his tendency to take on too much alone without reaching out for others. but 2nd rewatch like damn this guy sure is in MASSIVE debt and probably is both unable to get the assistance he needs/rationalizes not reaching out so his existing tendencies for taking on too much get exacerbated thru circumstance. (same w/ the groceries, like at first ur like damn sucks dude! but his sense of reality is so off he probably is full lying/in denial about ordering junk food)

also one of the informational lines was "the larva do the most damage" is...the implication that he'll become one? maybe?

him lying curled on the floor w/ the dead bugs with just ONE still slightly alive and moving // him going to town w/ that granola? bar/a single larva stuck waist deep into a candy bar.

there sure are shots of his left eye specifically. wish i knew what that meant

fire! more light imagery. the way he's very careless / leaves a giant fucking fire unattended to the house he JUST 'fixed up'

ugh even the grocery delivery as a sign of modern technology and convenience that just highlights how easy it is to be so utterly alone

entry way of the house having both an orchid (by a mirror...hm mirror imagery thoughts) and a big painting of an orchid right across the real thing. HMM the larger than life bravado / reality vs depictions of it and how it's very easy to fail to distinguish between the two, especially when you're alone and lack perspective.

OMG the convo w/ the 1st two potential buyers in front of the filled in bug crack. he rly did pass off the fucking monster energy drink as wine huh. mr liar...

he rly made his target demographic be super bougie and filled the house w/ super bougie tech but failed to consider the actual reality of the situation (the plumbing, location, any actual infrastructure, etc etc etc)

"the dining room is the beating heart of the house" UGH conflation of desire/hunger....killing me

OK THE RAT PORTRAITS ARE JUST ALL HIM? i wasn't sure at first but i do think it's intentional/realistic enough that he would put portraits of himself in all the rooms lmao. also him deciding to come lecture when there's actively a baby crying (with the audio just muted for the audience but still actively crying) also that baby named Isobel and the reflected eye hovering over her parents. girl get out of there. and also completely not reading the room and continue while the parents deal w/ the baby.

i DO think the way all of them ignore him is done to a like, uncanny degree and i can't tell if it's supposed to be like. almost metaphorical to visualize his disconnect with others or what, but they dont even react to one another rly either. like the kid just slopping ice cream everywhere....no reaction? none of them seem very interested in one another either so maybe it's supposed to be idk larger commentary on how excessive wealth completely disengages people from one another

OK but hhh the kid drawing loops w/ ice cream and the fish following the spiral from above until it overlays w/ the reflected eye....i see i am seeing.

OK but we see this guy trying to get a chair out and he's pulling and the chair doesn't budge......another point on the "performative image that is unlivable untenable and completely fake" same scene has someone trying to turn on the tv w/ the remote and no reaction

him starting his kitchen monologue with all this talk about the materials it's made from, the quality, but not the actual use.

his emotional thread unravelling and the phone breaking at the same time.

OK hearing the bugs speaking again i remember seeing a post where someone said this part had anti immigration undertones bc it's WEIRD how literally no other characters had non-british accents and yeah i see it. idk if it was intention per say but i do see it.

also yeah DEF implied the bugs were like. noticable to others during the showing but they only appear to him as a show of decline

him wearing shoe covers and the "you should take them off, no need for them now" OOF the way they manipulate him to "support him" while giving these digs (being interested in the random bits and bobs of the house he gets stuck on and engaging him in convo w/ that, leading him on w/ their Interest in the house, turning his question from moving the sale forward back against him w/ the "we should invite our solicitors over for food. if YOU have some that is")

bugs appearing in droves after he's invited them in / the fish eating ice cream. has fallen for the bait if you will

OHH him coughing/panting in the kitchen there. probably leftover from when he first poisoned himself hhhh and that it's in the kitchen. i wonder how noticable it all was to the guests.

ohhh w/ the lights on the crown is gone from the portrait head. OHH also it goes from "we're very interest in your house" to "the house" to "our house"

the face shape and the NO SIGNAL connection lost, to himself to the outside etc (also he says "our television")

OOF part of his decline instincts being eating at the papers he's tearing off the walls.

"van schoonbeek lane" is the name of the lane the house is on. hhhh

i do wonder what the "they lived here before, you know" bit means

again the gradual decline from asking to ordering him, becoming a slave to the circumstances the hole he dug himself into. cringe!

hospital the bugs coming in from the left and the hospital hallway sign showing exit -> right....cringe and fail!

mentioned this before i think but his last little gadget earpiece thing, him scratching it off himself to illustrate the loss of his last possible lifeline to the outside. also i think every time he had some kind of break down it involved it coming off in some way as well. so yeah!

#mine #the house 2022 #lb #pt 2 rly is the most Bad To Look At one. nightmarish

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makeste · 4 years ago

Text

BnHA Chapter 296: Ngl, This One Pissed Me Off

Previously on BnHA: Deku was all, “p.s. I actually activated yet another quirk several chapters ago when Kacchan got stabbed.” Compress was all, “[gets captured and passes out].” Spinner was all “[rifles through Tomura’s pockets and slaps a random Charbroiled Hand onto his friend’s unconscious face].” Tomura was all, “SOMEHOW THAT ACTUALLY WORKED” and woke up again, except it wasn’t really him, it was everyone’s favorite Final Villain, AFO. AFO was all, “time to escape finally” and summoned a bunch of Noumu and Absconded with Spinner and the DabiMarble in tow. Skeptic was all, “Horikoshi forgot I existed, but I’m actually Absconding in marble-form as well.” Deku was all, “ATTENTION WORLD, I WOULD LIKE TO ANNOUNCE THAT I OFFICIALLY WANT TO SAVE SHIGARAKI TOMURA.” And then the arc just sort of ended lol.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all, “but when you think about it, do we really need literally any female teachers at U.A. at all?” and for whatever reason doesn’t stop to wait for an answer. Midnight, who absolutely did not need to die, Dies, and I’m pissed about it. Ochako wanders the ruins of Jakku for what feels like hours, rescuing small children while her adult hero compatriots fall to pieces around her, because apparently the U.A. kids really are the only people who have their shit together. The citizens of Japan are all “damn that’s wild, wonder how fucked we are now,” but are actually super casual and chill about it which is oddly realistic. The chapter ends with AFO in Tartarus being all “lol time for the prison break arc,” without giving us so much as a chance to catch our breath, like holy shit. Are we on the clock or something now, goddamn.

lmao it’s like 7pm on a Sunday night and this is out already. this is like the worst possible timing lol. there goes my nice, relaxed evening. unless of course this turns out to be a nice, restful, soothing chapter, as chapters coming on the heels of traumatic, earth-shattering battles so often are. yeah, break out the Pina Colada song and the little drink umbrellas, I got a good feeling about this one

(ETA: I mean, I was obviously being sarcastic here but damn, Horikoshi.)

-- fff why did I laugh

it’s the crumbling city ruins in the background that really does it, I think. JUST LOOK AT THIS MESS THAT YOU HAVE MADE, EVERYONE. FOR SHAME

also, the title is dramatic af and I am so fucking excited you guys, like holy shit. BnHA’s In-Between arcs have always been my favorite part of the series, because it’s when all the character development and angst and/or catharsis happens. just, those little breathing spaces in between the action when everyone gathers to recuperate and compartmentalize their fresh new traumas lmao. bring on that angst!! but also, let’s please have some Comfort to offset all of this Hurt too, please and thanks

blah blah blah so the survivors were evacuated, good good, can you actually show us though?

AHHHHHHH

PIXIE BOB SURVIVED!!!! WASH IS STILL ALIVE LMAO HOW. THIRTEEN’S FACE, OMG SHOULD I LOOK AWAY. IS IT LIKE MANDALORIAN RULES. IDK HOW IT WORKS

HOW THE FUCK ARE THEY ALIVE. LOLS ANYWAY I’M HERE FOR IT. FEEL FREE NOT TO KILL ANYONE ELSE HERE HORIKOSHI, I THINK WE’RE GOOD

(ETA: it’s like talking to a brick wall.)

oh my god do we really need exposition about how the heroes tried to stop TomurAFO from escaping and OF COURSE failed completely because they suck lmao. oh my god I am shocked, that is such shocking news

wow they only managed to defeat three of the Noumus. holy shit. again, all of the Not-Kid Heroes are only slightly more useful than cardboard cutouts of heroes at this point, MORE AT ELEVEN

so Tomura may have lost the PLF, but he still more or less has an army then, huh. I really don’t know how anyone could expect a timeskip with that threat looming over everyone’s heads

oh nvm lol there are only seven Noumus left. wait so you’re telling me there were only ten Nearly High Ends in that last chapter?? felt more like fifty but whatever lol I’ll take your word for it

COMPRESS YAY YOU’RE ALIVE TOO

MAYBE THEY CAN EVEN REATTACH HIS ASS. I’M SERIOUS LOL, BECAUSE HE STILL HAS IT, DOESN’T HE? OR IF NOT, THEY CAN REBUILD HIM WITH A PROSTHETIC ASS. he’ll be more powerful than ever

WHAAAAAAT YEAH BOIIIII

WOOO, EDGESHOT, WOOOOO. THAT’S HIS WAY OF THE NINJA

YEAHHHHH SUCK IT, PLF

(ETA: for the record I don’t think Cementoss is dead here, just badly wounded. if he had died he would have been included in the forthcoming In Memoriam page along with the others.)

GET BENT LOL. TRUMPET I FOR REAL FORGOT YOU EVEN EXISTED. I NEVER WANT TO SEE ANY OF YOU LOSERS AGAIN PLEASE. ONLY INTERESTING CHARACTERS MAY PROCEED PAST THIS POINT

dsflksaldkh;l

that’s... holy shit. that’s a bigass mansion, that’s what that is. also so does this mean there are still eighty thousand PLF members still at large, because that’s a plot line I very much do not care about in any way whatsoever lol. can’t we just retcon to say that Re-Destro was exaggerating? I mean hell, a CEO criminal pulling some Enron-type bullshit is pretty believable, isn’t it? those poor bamboozled shareholders

“makeste, here’s an idea, what if you scrolled down to read the rest of the page” lol gtfo of here with your logic and your sense

well those 132 people have made it onto my enemies list, but at least it sounds like they more or less took care of the rest. good riddance

and Toga escaped, as we knew already, and is now on the lam. hopefully she reunites with the League again at some point. although her doing her own thing could also be very interesting. idk what I want lol

anyway so there’s another big panel showing how fucked up the city is, just in case it hadn’t already been hammered into our skulls yet. there’s a car dangling off a roof somehow. how does that even happen. did Machia pick it up and put it there or

NOOO OMG RANDOM SMALL CHILDREN IN PERIL WHAT IS THIS

OCHAKO PLEASE SAVE THEM OMG

“if it falls on me, I want you to have my Endeavor pouch” OH MY STARS. HIS MOST PRECIOUS POSSESSION. NO MY CHILD YOU CAN’T GIVE UP HOPE YET

LMAO

“FOR THE LAST TIME NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOUR DUSTY-ASS POUCH, KYLE” fffff these children are dying and I am cracking up so hard my eyes are tearing up what is wrong with me

YAY THEY SAVED THEM

but listen. not that I don’t love seeing the girls kick ass, because you know I do. but I also really, REALLY need to know what’s going down with the Musketeers, and I’m not looking forward to waiting three whole weeks for that so please Horikoshi. please hurry this along so we can get to them

goddamn it Tsuyu is saying she’ll take the boy to the shelter to get first aid, and I was all “okay great because that’s probably where Kacchan and the others are too”, but now someone else is shouting for help and Ochako’s all “I’ll go” and it’s like OKAY BUT PLEASE? this chapter is already more than half over omfg. ‘bout to start wringing some hands here

oh my god

is this Toga again??? WHAT THE HELL, THIS CREEPYASS HALF-DEAD DUDE BETTER BE LEADING UP TO SOMETHING INTERESTING, I AM REALLY GETTING IMPATIENT

OR, I GUESS, WE COULD DO THIS INSTEAD

“SO AS IT TURNS OUT, NOT EVERY CHARACTER WHO NEEDS HELP SAVING THEIR SPOUSE FROM FALLEN RUBBLE IS ACTUALLY TOGA IN DISGUISE” HUH, OKAY. DULY NOTED. FILED AWAY FOR FUTURE REFERENCE

but fucking... okay, look. I love Ochako, I do. but I like her a whole lot more when she’s interacting with other characters I actually care about, as opposed to running around in the rubble rescuing random people while the fate of my other children is still up in the air. like okay, I get it, shit’s bad, now if you don’t mind we really don’t have to spend all day here though

...anyways but nope, we’re still staying with her. she’s bouncing around rescuing all of these other people. omg. I literally have no patience here at all and it’s terrible, I know, but oh my god

omg finally something interesting is happening!!

look at that, an adult hero standing around being useless while the kids are busy getting shit done. why is this becoming a recurring theme

MY DUDE, THIS IS SERIOUSLY NOT THE TIME THOUGH

I GET THAT IT’S OVERWHELMING AND THAT YOU’RE TRAUMATIZED AND SHIT, BUT GUESS WHAT, SO IS EVERYONE ELSE. THAT’S WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR. JUST LOOK AT OCHAKO! SHE’S SO EXHAUSTED HER HAIR HAS EVEN LOST ITS FLOOF, AND YET SHE’S STILL OUT HERE DOING HER BEST. ONE SAVE AT A TIME MY MAN. GET IT DONE. LITERALLY A SMALL CHILD IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT CALLING FOR THEIR MOMMY AND YOU’RE JUST STANDING THERE ALL “WAHH IT’S TOO MUCH” LIKE COULD YOU PLEASE POSTPONE YOUR CRISIS UNTIL AFTER YOU SAVE THEM PLEASE

OH MY GOD

MAYBE YOU SHOULD!! oh my god I really cannot, like wow. oh no I actually have to save people and do my job, god forbid. jesus christ, at least the other heroes tried. but Moping Hero: Bellyache here is just throwing in the towel and fuck everyone who still needs his help I guess. you are like the anti-Deku my dude

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD NO OH FUCK

THAT’S MIDNIGHT’S HAND OH FU -- SHE BETTER NOT -- HORIKOSHI I SWEAR TO GOD --

I’M GONNA LOSE IT I REALLY AM!!!!

HOLY SHIT HOW INTENSE OF A RAGE DO I NEED TO BRACE MYSELF TO BE FEELING HERE. THIS CHAPTER WAS ALREADY TRENDING TOWARDS DISAPPOINTMENT, DO WE REALLY NEED TO GO AND COMPOUND THAT

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

you’re telling me Tomura wasn’t brought back by that electric shock, but by his “fuck you” attitude? why are you explaining this to us now, again??

......

HEY, SO UM, FUCK ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS, THOUGH. (: OH MAN. OHHHHHH MAN. I HAVE... I HAVE GOT A LOT OF WORDS FOR THIS AND HERE ARE SOME OF THEM

FUCK

THINGS THAT SHOULD BE IN THE DICTIONARY NEXT TO “SOME BULLSHIT”: THIS

FUCK

GET FUCKED HORIKOSHI

AND ALSO PLEASE FUCK RIGHT OFF!!

AND SERIOUSLY THOUGH FUCK YOU

NO BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THOUGH!! YOU COULD HAVE KILLED OFF ANYONE. LITERALLY ANY CHARACTER. YOU HAD TWELVE FEMALE PROS. TWELVE. YOU COULD HAVE MADE MORE OF THEM. PROBABLY, IF THERE ACTUALLY WERE SUPERHEROES IN REAL LIFE, THERE WOULD BE MORE THAN TWELVE OF THEM IN AN ENTIRE NATION. BUT NO, YOU WERE ALL “TWELVE IS MORE THAN ENOUGH.” AND THEN WHEN IT CAME TIME TO KILL PEOPLE OFF, YOU WERE ALL “WELL ALL RIGHT THEN, LET’S SEE, I PICK... THESE 18 RANDOM SIDE CHARACTERS WITH LITTLE TO NO DIALOGUE, PLUS THE ONE SINGLE FEMALE U.A. STAFF MEMBER WE ACTUALLY HAD. YEAH THAT OUGHTA DO IT”

AND BY THE WAY, HORIKOSHI, I PICKED SOMETHING UP FOR YOU ON MY WAY HOME, HERE IT IS, ┌П┐(・＿・) do you like it it was on sale. I saw it and was like, “Horikoshi would really like that.” so there you go. sorry it wasn’t gift-wrapped

p.s. I hope y’all can tell that that’s supposed to be a middle finger and not... something else lmao. er. anyway

(ETA: so I got a few asks from people who were really put off by this part of the reaction post, and so I’m just adding an extra note here to make it clear that I do not actually wish harm on Horikoshi in any way or even particularly dislike him. I wasn’t happy about Midnight’s death and I wanted to convey that, and so I went with my usual LOUD CAPSLOCK REACTION tone, but looking back on it I can see that it’s kind of a lot, lol.

so just to be clear, the “fuck you” stuff is almost entirely tongue-in-cheek. that’s on me, I forget sometimes that there are people who share these sentiments unironically and so I didn’t think to make sure my intended meaning here was clear. anyways, killing Midnight was still a really problematic decision for numerous reasons but it is what it is. Horikoshi is not perfect, the story isn’t perfect, and I’m not gonna pretend like it is, but again just to be clear, I don’t harbor any actual ill will toward Horikoshi here.)

shit. and wow this man really went and killed off fucking Mystic too on top of that. have you ever seen a character fail so spectacularly at living up to their hype. r.i.p. Mystic you were like the Star Wars sequel of characters

(ETA: I have no fucking idea why I keep thinking Majestic’s name is Mystic lol. rest in peace you old scarecrowy bastard.)

and poor Momo, though. fuck. lost two mentors in a single day. and do not even get me started on Aizawa holy shit

so now we’re cutting to some random townspeople who are gossiping about the Todoroki drama. this is actually interesting in spite of my newfound determination to hate this chapter lol

ngl I am kind of heartened to see that not everyone fell for Dabi’s bs hook line and sinker though. Jeanist returning from the dead literally two seconds after Dabi was all “I SWEAR ON MY HONOR AS A VILLAIN THAT HAWKS MURDERED HIM” probably helped with that a bit! but there will doubtless be many other people who do believe him, or are at least still inclined to side-eye the heroes in general either way given how much they sucked in this arc. very, very interesting

so it seems though that even more than the whole Endeavor reveal, at the end of the day it’s going to be the heroes failing to live up to their end of the “put your faith in us and let us use our quirks and in return we’ll protect everyone and keep them safe” implied social contract that’s going to have the biggest impact on people’s opinions moving forward. basically this was always going to be a disaster no matter what

OH MY GOD FINALLY AHHHHH

Horikoshi really tapped into some of the real-life political energy of the past few years huh. Fuck Him Still for killing off Midnight, but I will admit that so far this is hella intriguing and I am really, really curious to see where things go from here

OH MY GOD THE LITTLE KIDS FROM THE BABYSITTING ARC

“FIVE PEEPEE MAN WOULDN’T LIE TO US” YES CHILDREN YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. at least the little ones still have faith

( •̀ へ •́ )

that’s great. that’s really keen. all we need right now, amirite

GOOD FOR YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT

let’s just wait for him to explain what he feels. you know he likes to drag it out

is that Dabi crouched down there next to Spinner? looks like they got him out of the marble after all. but why has his hair changed colors again lol what

anyways. your turn to what??

:’) excuse me what

hahahaha are you fucking kidding me. and that’s where we’re going to end the chapter then. lol okay

so let’s recap. Midnight died. we spent ten hours watching Ochako dig people out of rubble for no apparent reason and were then introduced to my new least favorite character, and because Ochako is so nice she didn’t even punch him in the face even though she really should have. we did not get any Kacchan or Shouto. we got one panel of Deku, who is Finally Asleep. and the chapter ended with AFO ordering his Noumus to go set free, AND I QUOTE, HIS “MAIN BODY.” and now I gotta wait an entire week for Caleb’s translation to confirm that last part. omg

but it sounds like a prison break is imminent, which is very, very interesting. ...and actually, is it weird that I’m actually rooting for it to be a success? I have no idea what this guy is planning, but I do know that as long as the main part of his soul is still residing in Tomura’s body, Tomura’s chance of surviving the series is close to zero. and villain though he may be, I’m still rooting for his redemption (nice to have Deku on my side now too), and so yeah. so like if AFO feels like using some latent Exorcism Quirk or something that he’s been saving for just such an occasion, be my guest lol

meanwhile this doesn’t bode well for All Might though. or anyone else aside from Tomura, really. shiiiit

anyway. [slaps roof of chapter] this baby can fit so much bullshit in it

#bnha 296 #midnight (bnha)#uraraka ochako #all for one #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #sorry this took so long to post lol #I really need to learn to add an extra 2-3 hours to any time-sensitive estimates I make #anyways

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rhaenyraisadyke · 4 years ago

Text

A Year Later Transcript: 8/3/21

Here it all is on a google doc if that is easier to read!

W: “I heard there was a special place.. Where men could go and emancipate.. The brutality and the tyranny of their rulers…” Do you know that one Ranboo?

R: I have I have I have, I’ve heard that one a few times, I had a friend that sings that one quite a lot.

W: Yeah it's great, I- I personally, I am a big big fan of the song and not just because I wrote it, I know, I know they saw aww yeah they say you are your own worst critic, but I mean, I think it's good. Do you know what it's based on?

R: Mhm mhm

W: Obviously it's based on hallelujah, but the thing is Ranboo, right is the reason we did it is because Tommy used to sing hallelujah to the plants around the thing... the caravan! Do you remember the caravan? You have heard of the caravan right?

R: Yeah, yeah I’ve heard of it and seen the re-creation of it at the museum, but that's really it.

W: Actually can we go see it? Let's go see it quickly!

R: Yeah, sure.

W: So, so, he used to plant the stuff around the caravan, and it made it grow better, he hehe used to ha, my man Tommy, what is this? This is new.. I won’t ask questions…

R: I- Someone planted a lot of beats here and I don’t know why

W: OH, okay I quite like it, it looks really nice, it looks nicer than the target that used to be here. Um

R: Yeah

W: So my man Tommy used to sing to the plants to make them grow better um and that was the song he used to sing so I thought what a better way to honor tommy, one of the most loyal members of our fair nation then to name the song after him and base the song after his little muse. Tommy is all of our muse really, I'd say. So here's the museum.

R: Yeah, Yeah

W: I haven't been to the museum, wait las- that's where I met you Ranboo right?

R: Oh yeah yeah, that's where you saw me next to the um poster of myself… I don't know why that's still up, I kinda put that there and it preceded to stay there, is it still set up? Oh, oh no.

W: It’s not still up anymore it was here, it was right here on this wall. I quite liked it, but I guess not enough for it to be history though.

R: I’m not historical yet apparently.

W: So yeah in here, in here where the declaration of independence would sit on the wall here, it was actually quite, quite a nice van, not quite as nice as yours, I quite liked what you were doing with yours. Have you been working on it since I’ve been gone?

R: Yeah I’ve been working on it. I added a nice little table outside and did some pathways and appropriately themed flowers.

W: Thats nice

R: Yeah!

W: Let's go to Lmanburg or what was lmanburg, last time I saw it was a big glass thing.

R: Yeah I think it goes by Lmanhole now apparently.

W: Ahh ehh, that's kind of rude, it's kind of rude to Lmanburgs history you know?

R: mhm

W: It’s called Lmanburg, it's called Lmanburg. NOT Manberg NOT Lcrater or whatever, Lmanhole I don’t care it's now Lmanburg it's always Lmanburg. It’s just how it goes.

R: Okay

W: Yeah so that's why the song exists as it is. Oh there's no glass.

R: Yeah! Yeah I mean it seems to have changed a little bit.

W: YOOOO I actually didn’t know this was here

R: Yeah! It’s even got the flag down there at the bottom

W: It’s got the flag man! Can we go down and see the flag? Cmon Cmon lets go

R: Yeah yeah wait you alright?

W: I’m like a lemming I don’t care I’m just gonna jump

R: Oh well okay… careful!

W: Look at this dude!

R: Yeahh

W: Oh wow I really went down to bedrock didn't I? Holy Shit.. I did a number on this place. This is amazing!! Ahhh This is what it deserved, not the glass bullshit, this is what it needed, this like beautiful overgrowing, it feels like it happened, it doesn't feel like a monument, it feels like nature has claimed it back,

R: The book has kind of closed in that sense

W: Yeah.. we’ve got, look they have got they rebuilt the lake man! And this used to be a real river about here into Lmanburg- wait, Ranboo do you see that is that Tubbo?

R: Yeah… that's Tubbo

W: Aye Tubbo!

T: “I heard there was a special place where men could go and emancipate…”

W: Tubbo?

T: “ the tyranny” - oh?

W: Tubbo!

T: Hello?

W: Haha! You’ve came, I- I havent seen you dude in FUCKING ages! Tubbo, are you singing the song?

T: Yeah… Yeahhh?

W: Are you? Are you singing the thing?

T: Yeah hello?

W: Hold on I’m coming im coming im coming man

T: Where are you?

W: Hold on, I'm coming around, here I come, Tubbo man! I haven't seen you in ages!

T: H-H..Hello.. Wilbur..

W: I’m coming around man!

T: Yeah aha…

W: Bro! Its-

T: Weird seeing you here.

W: What in Lmanburg? That seems like the most normal place to see me.

T: Uhh yeah I suppose so

W: Well I- dude I don’t even know what to say to you man, it's like looking in a little mirror, you are even still wearing my suit still?

T: Yeahh

W: How long have you been wearing that?

T: Oh I just put it on for today, I just for it's been a year now…

W: Well you look good in it! Ranboo have you met Tubbo?

R: Yeah! Well I’ve I’ve met him, I mean we’ve um… been around yeah

W: Well Tubbo I’m really happy to see you man, dude

T: Ah, well thank you.

W: Do you even know what happened? Since,

T: What do you mean what's happened?

W: I saw you briefly man when I was resurrected, I remember you SUPER SUPER briefly but this is the first time we have actually gotten to speak, I- I will admit I was a little overwhelmed during that whole thing. I was running across the glass, thank god it's gone, this is far more adpt, but I was running across the glass, I’m sorry I wasn't you know, entirely on the same page, but I promise you I’ve calmed down I’m all settled in, I understand what's changed, what's happened whos new, whos old whos still about who uh…. Who trusts me and stuff

T: Did they fill you in on the story? Like what happened here after you died?

W: Yeah, they did, I’m gonna be honest with you it's not a pretty one, I kind of left a bit of a ripple. If I was a rock, dropped in a lake, I’m a pretty big rock

T: You- yeah’

W: And I can’t say I’m not- I’m not flattered. I mean I am flattered, I’m not TOO upset about it, I like being the big ripple, but more than anything, I want to say super simple man. I want to say. I want to say I’m sorry

T: Awe

W: For one thing mainly, I’ve been thinking about this for years, LITERAL years. I’m sorry for making you president specifically before blowing it up and I’m sorry for when I did this and blew all this up and making this hole,

T: Well I mean-

W: and making you president of a crater and i'm sorry. I’m really really sorry. I really am

T: I mean this wasnt all you Wilbur….

W: We’ll get to that, do you? Do you forgive me?

T: Yeah, I do forgive you

W: Man, ahhh my little treasury, secretary treasury, do you remember that?

T: Yeah yeah I remember that. Secretary to treasury

W: Ranboo he was the secretary to treasury and then he was president

R: Yeah

W: And then he was president

T: Yeah I’m pretty sure the treasury was like somewhere there.

W: So what were you saying about me not being the one there who blew it up?

T: Well I mean you definitely blew it up. I feel like you’re missing some vital information.

W: Wait, so you rebuilt it? How long -how long did it stand before this happened?

T: Yeah so, me, and mainly ghostbur honestly like

W: ….ghostbur….

T: He- put so much effort into making it right again.

W: Is he this obsidian crap I take it and these uh? Fucking lanterns

T: You know dream?

W: Yeah I know Dream- I love him. Dream’s Dreams

T: Oh..

W: Dreams probably my favorite person, sorry Ranboo i mean uh no contest here, Dreams probably my favorite person he saved me

T: Oh.. Oh..

W: He saved me he brought me back to life

T: Well um yeah I mean he was powerful I guess but um Techno and Philza yeah um

W: Techno and Phil blew this up?

T: They built this big obsidian contraption overnight… I couldn’t even see it coming. And they rained TNT for days.

W: nhh

R: Yeah…

W: And that's.. Wait hold on, why would Techno and Phil do this? Why would Techno and Phil blow up Lmanburg? Didn’t they live here? I mean I don’t know about Techno…

T: Techno and Phil, they hated the government, it was partially my fault as well…

W: But you didn’t blow it up

T: No, I didn't. I never wished for anything to happen like this.

W: So it was just Techno and Phil?

T: Y-y yes..

W: Sorry that's kind of just hit my not the blowing up part- You know I’ve done that,

T: Yeah

W: I’m not shaken up about that. I’m shaken up about man, is that, you rebuilt this! After I was gone

T: I can’t take all the credit obviously but there was a big effort

W: That fucking ghost- who cares man YOU rebuilt this! Bro, you

T: Yeah I suppose

W: MY fucking grave! I was so pressed about not having a grave, screw a grave I built something that you loved that YOU wanted to preserve… thats,

T: Yeah, I really honestly…

W: Tubbo that's worth more to me than a grave. That's worth more to me than this shrine. That's worth more to me then- Tubbo this is probably the best gift I have ever been given, this knowledge that people actually cared enough, that you cared enough to rebuild this community after it fell.

T: Ahh, I’m glad you’re happy.

W: You… haha, sorry, aww man, Tubbo thank you.

T: It’s alright, I just feel lost without Lmanburg. All my core beliefs.. Everything died with it.

W: You feel lost without Lmanburg

T: I have no purpose.. Anymore.

W: I guess that's where anarchy fails… Tubbo, I have a little, a little thing coming. Not big, nothing much yet, ehh, it's not a big deal you know, it's a little burger van at the moment but I got plans, big plans. Tubbo it's called paradise

T: Paradise.

W: Yeah, yeah will, would you like to come join me in paradise? Literally?

T: Hmmmm, Id, I’m not sure Wilbur, I’m not sure I trust you man. In order to follow someone I need to trust them.

W: Wait… wait- but I thought you forgave me!

T: Yeah Wilbur I forgive you because I like to hang onto the hope that people change but, I don’t trust you yet Wilbur.

W: Okay… Taboo. I literally was dead for thirteen years. I know it wasn't long for you, I know it was only a couple months for you but thirteen years Tubbo… Thirteen years of my life. I am old! Look at me! I’m not the same young man you knew. I-I’ve been through it and in those years, I’ve learned Tubbo, i wasn't just sat twiddling my thumbs just going “oooh this is nice ohhh i'm in darkness right now” you know I was thinking. I relived that explosion in my head so many times man, and I get that you don’t trust me, I do but like man! Look at me bro, I’m not gonna do it again, I’m not gonna hurt you again. I’m not gonna you know… I know you, you had the festival with Technoblade, I never spoke properly to you about this.

T: mm

W: I could have saved you…

T: But you didn’t

W: I- Tubbo… I’m reaching out to you man, I’m on my knees.. I, I’m sorry. I’m really really sorry and I literally, your forgiveness means so much to me but it doesnt give up what I did to you and it doesnt give up how I failed you as a friend, you know eh, fuck being as a coworker but just you know anything… Ranboo you might know or have known all of this and I’m really sorry if this was your first of hearing I can explain later on but like..

R: Alright………

W: Tubbo, man, I’m, I want to make it up to you. And you know what? I appreciate you don’t trust me. I do.

T: Wilbur in order for you to gain my trust back you have to prove it first. I can’t just give it out anymore. I used to be able to, but I just, I just can’t.

W: Tubbo… I really appreciate it, and I mean that genuinely. I appreciate it and I am gonna go out and prove to you I’m worth being trusted again. I promise.

T: Okay…

W: I’ll do it. I’ll do it. I’ll redeem myself and you'll.. Youll

T: Do you know I still have dreams right? Of the explosion… And, and of the fireworks. And all of it. I vividly see all of it every day. It HURTS. It hurts Wilbur a lot.

W: I- Tubbo, Tubbo, I know, I know, Tubbo, Tubbo, Tubbo Tubbo, please, I know…. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I- arhh It feels like sorry is such a weak word. I feel like there's nothing stronger that I can say, and I understand what you mean about how my actions need to reflect it and they will. Give me time. I’m gonna make something. I'm gonna make something of this and I’m gonna…

Uhhhh

Tubbo do you know how fucking strong you are? And I’m not trying to say - I’ve got your forgiveness, but I know I need to earn your trust but man… you're so strong man, genuinely. Just the fact you proved to me that just there that you have these memories and these nightmares, you still found it in your heart to forgive me, that's... You’re a fucking champion man. You’re a hero.

Look I get you don’t want to join me in paradise. We won’t talk about that anymore but, cmon, at least come and see, come and at least see what me and Ranboo have been doing! Look I don’t know- Ranboo are you? Are you and Tubbo friends? Are you and Tubbo like good friends?

R: Yeah, yeah I’d say so.

W: Then why don't you and him come and see what I’ve made! Come and see what I’ve got going on! Lets go lets go!

T: I think.. I think I’m gonna stay here, Wilbur. I think I’m fine, just to stay here.

W: No, no man, no worries. Look at me bro look at me bro! Chin up! Look, lucky rabbit's foot!

T: Okay…

W: Tommy gave it to me

T: Lucky Rabbit's foot…

W: Lucky Rabbit's foot man, chin up. Ranboo, I’ll, you can come, it's cool.

R: I will, I will. Do you need me to stay here?

T: No.. *sniffles* I’d like to be left alone please

R: Oh… you sure? I mean.. I can stay…

T: Yes. I’m fine

R:You sure? Okay...

W: Ranboo! Let's go man.

R: Yep! Lets- lets go

W: Cya tubbo! I’ll send a letter!

T: Uhuh

W: Comeon Ranboo

R: Alright

W: Ah man! It’s its I mean I I was gonna say this is hard, but obviously it's hard, I’ve -

R: It is, it is

W: It's difficult man and I’ve been you know it's gonna get better and it's gonna be worth it when I see them smiling.

R: Yeah, yeah

W: Tubbo, Jack, Niki, Tommy, anyone… Do you know who the original Lmanburg group were? Do you know who we were?

R: Ah, uhh I think most of them yeah, I think it was you, Jack, Niki, Fundy I believe as well

W: Fundy was after, Fundy was a bit after we got independence

R: mhm yeah I don’t really. I don’t really know much of lmanburg history

W: That’s alright you’ve got it down, it's correct. It’s that group and we um yeah we fought against Dream and we managed to succeed and we created a life process. Ranboo I’m gonna tell you something I’ve never really told anyone, I try and keep this on the low because I don’t want uh people to use it against me is the main problem. I didn’t even tell Tommy. I- I lied to Tommy I’m gonna be honest. I’ll tell him soon

R: Yeah

W: I’ll tell him I lied to him because I feel- it kind of eats away at me. I kind of- I told Tommy that I didn’t actually care about Lmanburg and that it was actually a tool for me to get and gain power and stuff but it's not true. Lmanburg was really important to me and it is still to this day. I want it, I want its history to live on, not as a stain caused by me because I basically took a bit shit on the history books. I wanna, I wanna make it feel like it was you know something that happened and it was a great thing. Think of the good times, the years and years well not years but you know the time of safety the time of fun, prosperity! We built parks, we built you know, no taxes, big walls, we had democracy! All be a slightly disjointed version of it but you know, that's how people should remember Lmanburg, that's what people think of when they think of our nation you know? And that's, and Tubbos the last connection we really have, I mean he, he said it himself, he's kind of you know… he's got nothing without it. I’ve heard of what Tommy, Tommys you know moved on and Jacks moved on and Niki’s moved on and everyones moved on at least partially… but Tubbo man, he's still……

R: Yeah he's still very strung up about it even though it's been awhile… He, he distracts himself with projects and everything which is nice but, you

W: Heh, projects

R: I mean yeah fortifications as well

W: I think he's gonna be alright

R: I hope so

W: I’m looking out for him. Anyway I want to say thank you Ranboo for you know trusting me this quick, I mean you barely know me

R: I mean, yeah

W: You barely have known me very long and you just know you’ve done all this with me and you’ve worked with me and I- I- you know I don’t I don’t know where I’d be without you here right now, man. T-Tommy’s great and all he's here and all but I don't wanna string him along too much because hes- I, when I look at him, when I look at him and he's helping me out and building things with me, I - I see the same eyes that looked at me when… when… there weren't some fun times in the ravine of Pogtopia I wasn't a very well man, and I can just see Tommy from that day…

oH!! Ranboo! This looks great man!

R: Yeah yea, I’ve made a couple of um changes to it. Added some stuff to it

W: Like I was saying though, I appreciate it, I really appreciate it.

R: Yeahh, yeah of course! Of course

W: May I ask, I know I’ve already asked this before but why do you trust me so fast? What's the…?

R: I mean I like to normally see the good in people and everything.

W: I know we’ve gone through that and you’ve made me cry just

R: Yeahhh, sorry about that, but I- I think the reason I think I know what it's like to have no one hurt or at least feel like no one trusts you.

W: Mhm

R: Um, and I- I’ve realised that if no one is with you, then how can anyone really know when you’ve redeemed yourself. So that's why I’m here

W: You wanna see the fireworks?

R: Well maybe not the fireworks but, I mean at least

W: Ceremonial

R: At least when you change er redeem yourself I think it- it's good to have someone there and it's not nice to be alone all the time so…

W: My boy! Ranboo, I knew

R: Yeah!

W: I knew I could trust you. We got the exact same mindset I’m thinking of ahh Ranboo I love what you have done with the burger van

R: Thank you, I’m glad you like it

W: I think this is going to be a beginning of a beautiful partnership,

R: Yeah!

W:beautiful friendship, and maybe when Tubbo comes we can you know have a big party and all get to know each other a bit better.

R: Yeah I can, I can talk with him I think and maybe get him to uh join hopefully

W: Yeah, don’t pressure him. He doesn't have to join, he just needs to come. I just want him to come and see our patented burgers!

R: Yeah!

W: Our burgers, our burger NFTS he needs to come and try them! Ranboo. Thank you man

R: You’re welcome, I’m glad that I could help out a little bit at least.

W: You’re a brilliant man and I'm going to go now a happy man.

R: That's good, I’m glad you’re happy.

W: Thank you Ranboo. Buh Bye. Ah, I love that guy bro!

#dsmp transcript #transcript #tubbo #ranboo #wilbur soot #lmanburg #c!tubbo #c!ranboo #c!wilbur #las nevadas #paradise

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slytherinsnekxvii · 4 years ago

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let's talk about severus snape. he's one of the most controversial characters the internet has to offer, with several blogs, channels and pages dedicated specifically to hating him, despite him having one of the most—if not the most—intriguing character arcs the series has to offer. so, as a result of me coming across far too many of said blogs, channels or pages, here's an extremely detailed explanation of why i like him and think he's easily one of my favourite characters :)

1. he's not that bad of a teacher.

just so you know, i'm a teenage girl fresh out of high school. so, my experience with teachers? still keeps me up at night :)

my family is pretty strict about religion. you can guess what that means. anything that was magic-adjacent, especially something that, god forbid, had an entire school dedicated to witchcraft and wizardry was a hard no if i wanted to have any sort of freedom over the media i paid attention to, and any opportunity to go about my life without being monitored to make sure i wasn't suddenly possessed or something. thanks to this, i ended up secretly reading the philosopher's stone in my last year of primary school. i would've been 11 at the time, just about to turn 12, so a little bit older than harry and co. going on what i'd heard from those who had already read the series, i went in expecting to absolutely despise this man. i went in expecting to read a demon. i finished the book and came out thinking... that really wasn't that bad.

my mom found out, so i didn't get to read the rest of the series until i ended up on the executive committee for my school's book club and my friends were appalled that i'd only read the first book. at this point, i'm still expecting him to get worse and... he just doesn't. when i was in primary school, i had multiple teachers break wooden meter-long rulers across my classmates' backs. the first time it happened, i was in infant year 2 (about 6/7 years old). i had teachers who would insult us, based on anything from hygiene to behaviour to intelligence if you looked at them wrong. my sister (who was three years ahead of me) had a teacher who kept her in hours after school was over because the teacher had a written a note in her workbook upside down, and when my sister corrected her, the teacher made her rewrite it, turning the book each time the note was written so it would never be done the correct way.

in secondary school, i had teachers who would actively humiliate us in front of the class if we didn't do as well as they wanted. i had teachers who would throw markers and whiteboard erasers at us if we did something they didn't like during class. i had a teacher who looked for a friend of mine who was petrified of attention and then mercilessly picked on her until she went to the bathrooms to cry. these are the kinds of teachers that i was used to. so, when i read harry potter and read snape, who would have probably been one of the nicer teachers i met in my lifetime, i thought to myself, he's really not that bad. he's just... strict.

antis claim that he traumatised every kid that ever went through his class, that he straight up abused them and... no. he didn't. all of them are comfortable talking back, they talk during his class, no one trembles when he walks past, except for neville, who usually bore the brunt of snape's anger because he was consistently messing up in a potentially lethal class.

after school, i hated the thought of formal education, so now i'm working until i feel ready to do university. coincidentally, one of my jobs is teaching maths and english to kids writing the end of primary and secondary school exams. given the sheer amount of annoyance i feel sometimes, i actually respect him for not being more harsh with them, especially when they're all running off into danger or exploding cauldrons.

he really isn't that bad of a teacher, and we know this, since his classes' owl results are said to be consistently good.

plus, he was written in the 90's when all this was okay behaviour for teachers. hell, compared to some of the teachers in text, given that he goes out of his way to make sure the students are always protected, he's a lot better than most people give him credit for.

2. i relate to him.

come on, the man grew up to be a dramatic, queer-coded, petty bitch who wears all black all the time and likely has at least one mental disorder. i'm a petty, emo bisexual with (actually diagnosed, don't worry) depression and anxiety and I'm in a theatre group. what did you really expect from me?

on a serious note, both of the schools i went to were considered "prestigious". i got into my primary school because of a teacher's recommendation (she was a family friend). the second school i got into was because i scored ridiculously high on the placement test that would determine which school i went to. in primary school, i was the poor, really awkward, really smart kid who got left out of everything, and my best friend was the only kid who was worse off than me.

in secondary school, i was just as smart as everyone else... but i was still poorer, and still more awkward and still got left out of everything.

i got that isolated feeling, that feeling of not being good enough, that feeling where life always seems to have it out for you and that's even though i still got dealt a better hand than snape ever did. so, i get it. i'm never ever going to have it as bad as he did, but i acknowledge what he went through and i sympathise, because i have a chance, but it only ever got worse for him.

3. i genuinely enjoy his character.

this dude went through absolute hell for basically his entire life. the best years he had were probably when he was neck-deep in the group of people who hated witches and wizards like him, but somehow managed to treat him better than the good guys.

all of that, and he still manages to be one of the most entertaining motherfuckers in the whole series, with one of the most interesting character arcs ever. it's the witty lines, the sheer dynamic of his character, the change from the twitchy, hypervigilant kid from the slums to the adult that managed to spy on the Dark Lord himself and save the wizarding world in the process, while still being a hot mess of a person. it's the managing to get shit done while everybody hated him and everything was going to hell. it's the everything, and i haven't even talked about how badass he is.

come on, potions prodigy turned master, exemplary duellist (cough, cough, winning 4-on-1 vs McGonagall, Flitwick, Sprout and Slughorn, and leaving a scratch on nobody, while managing to not take a single hit himself, cough, cough), spellcrafter, spy and one of the only wizards to ever figure out unaided flight. dark arts master, proficient at healing (dumbledore would've been dead a lot sooner, if it weren't for him, most likely). he's one of the most powerful wizards of his time. i've said that any universe where he's actually a bad guy—or just legitimately loyal to the death eaters—is a universe where voldemort wins and this is why. if he was motivated by literally anything other than lily, the wizarding world was more than likely fucked.

the point is, i just think he's neat.

4. spite.

every time i appreciate snape, a snater feels like someone is walking over their grave. every time i appreciate snape, a snater turns blue out of sheer rage. every time i appreciate snape, a snater loses their mind looking for their non-existent reading comprehension.

the spite in my veins is tempered only by the broth of instant ramen and ungodly amounts of sugar, and i'm going to use them all in my mission to cause antis pain when they refuse to acknowledge their lack of critical thinking and analysis skills.

so, yeah. why do i actually like snape?

tl;dr: he's not that bad. for a teacher written in the 90's and compared to teachers i've had within the decade, the guy's just strict. sure, he's a dick (who i personally think is hilarious), but he always makes sure the students are safe and he didn't leave any lasting effect on any of the students. he's really not that bad of a teacher. and hell, he's not even that bad of a person. i fully admit that he was an asshole and i entirely believe he was prone to self-destructive behaviour, but he still tried to atone for his mistakes and he did, is the thing, even though the odds were stacked more or less completely against him. i like him because he entertains me, and because i relate to him, as a teen who went through some shit and probably would have joined up with some bad people if it weren't for my friends and family, and as a teacher who really can't stand my students sometimes. i also like him because it irritates people who don't like him :)

also, istg if any of you respond to this with "bUt hE was ObseSsED with LiLY and just WAnTEd to FUCK hEr," i'm crawling into your bedroom window with the most unrealistic, mangled interpretations of your favourite characters and making sure they haunt you in your dreams. meet me in the fuckin' pit, babe. reread the series, actually think about it and come with receipts that aren't Voldemort, because i don't think you want to have the same opinion as the character who canonically doesn't understand love, now, do you, sweetheart? when you do that, then, and only then, will i consider entertaining your bullshit :)

that's about it from me, thanks for reading!

#severus snape #pro snape #why do people like snape?#i can't speak for anybody else but here's me #i probably left something out since i haven't written a good essay since my literature exam #but it's fine #let me like my chaotic bastard son in peace please #snape #snapedom

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tundrainafrica · 5 years ago

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Why I love LeviHan (a rant)

So I'm pretty new to the LeviHan community and I just wanted to rant about how much of a work of art this fucking ship is even though I have no idea whether Isayama did it on purpose or not. But damn, this ship literally introduced me to the drama of shipping fluff and AUs --- two genres I used to avoid like the plague because never have I felt such adamance for a ship to set sail in YEARS since Percabeth back in high school.

To give some background about myself, the past five years, I was no fan of ships. Like literally, I tried to avoid shipping fics like the plague (for any fandom) because I was like "come on war racial war, zombie like monsters? Who has time to fall in love?" A lot of non romance shows don’t leave time for a relationship to develop and we literally just get a time skip where suddenly they pair people up together and I’m like woop good story but yo how the heck did they end up together.

In real life, I also did get into a healthy relationship with a guy, a slow burn after five years type and I thought yeah I've seen how I want a relationship to develop and now imma be picky as fuck with ships.

I did end up picky as fuck with ships but Isayama with the minimal screen time he actually gave this ship to set sail with probably minimal intention to actually confirm their ship got me climbing into this ship while it sunk canonically after chapter 132 because holy fuck ISAYAMA YOU MAD MAN.

Let's talk about how they were introduced. Trost is destroyed. Titans are impossible to kill then whoop. We get a group of weirdos and outcasts who can somehow kill titans like crazy.

Strong titan slayer dude.

Strong titan slayer girl. (Hange is female to me.)

Cool commander dude.

Cool interesting characters. Eren's dream team since episode 1. Two captains. Constantly together. Erwin is their glue. Nothing suspicious about that. They work together. They're too busy fighting Titans to actually be considering a relationship right??

Besides, Hange and Levi are just way too different like

Levi is like *slash slash slash I hate titans u ugly* *slash slash slash eww titan blood* *slash slash slash kill Titans they're all monsters*

Hange is like *slash slash slash oooh titan blood* *slash slash slash dont kill them i wanna dissect them* *doesn't slash* titans make me horny.

Like sure we could argue opposites attract but there are more cases where opposite personality dating would probably backfire and with the idiosyncrasies of both parties at polar ends of the spectrum it just didn't seem possible for there to be a spark? Like logistically they would tear each other's hair out if they were stuck together in a relationship.

At that point, Erwin being the middle ground between both captain weirdos, I couldn't help but think shipping Erwin with either of them would have been the more realistic option.

Season 2 had its fair share the first two scenes with Levi picking her up and the carriage. Didn't see anything too sparky yet and yes the last scene where he could tell who she is by her knock. (but yes sparks flew in hindsight).

Season 3: Erwin the glue gets trapped in capital due to political reasons and only one arm. Two captains forced to combine forces to manage the survey corps in peril. They get their bonding moments like torturing some dude together and reflecting over the untimely deaths of Hange’s squad. (and maybe Levi’s squad too)

They separate while coup d'etat happens because their skills were needed elsewhere. They got to save Eren and like hours later in the cavern Levi was especially concerned about Hange when she got shot by the hook back in the cavern like you don't see that concern with any other character except maybe Erwin. (But it can be argued that maybe all the other people he ever loved died too fast he never got the time to be concerned.)

All the way until the battle of Shiganshina Levi is usually with Hange.

When he’s not with her, there’s a reason (usually Erwin’s orders.)

When he's not with her he's thinking about her.

Then Erwin their magical glue of a commander does die and the captains gotta stick together even without the glue because they're the last two surviving people in the old survey corps.

It's apparent Levi hates the changes made to the survey corps because he still keeps the green cloak which everyone kinda abandoned. So it can be argued that Hänge was also that last bit of fresh air Levi had of the olden days.

they're

together

almost

Every

Friking

Scene

Like you can't blame them. Levi is anti social and traditional survey corps type.

Hange is still reeling from the loss of Erwin and her quick rise to power as commander.

They may have differing personalities but they had the same history. They both know loss, bloodshed and battle the survey corps brings that no one else probably understands to the extent they do.

And we get the bombshell of this scene.

Hange literally proposes to him that they just run away to the forest and just build a life for themselves and the cold harsh brazen Levi doesn't outright reject it.

He instead acknowledges what he knows about her that she'll never do that. This only confirms that they know each other too well, that they have a bond that exists between them which cannot so easily be replaced by anyone else.

And then a few chapters later

Dead.

And sure yeah Levi didn't cry but like yo, the way Levi handled her death is worse than crying. We have never seen Levi react to a death like this.

Levi is holding on to the hand which touched Hange’s.

Levi just sits down in the middle of a pivotal scene and where he might end up fighting any minute coz like what's life he literally lost everything he could have lived for.

Like sure people who don't think LeviHan is canon would say “He’s injured. He’s tired.”

Just a few chapters ago though we got him ready to fight

"That’s the last person left of course it would break him more than anything"

That's the point. They're complete opposites they've been together for years and even if the chemistry wasn't there before, even if they would never have gotten along at all, personality and logistics-wise, they were placed in a situation where their glue Erwin died, everything of the life they knew before, all their loved ones in the survey corps died and now they were left with the responsibility of managing what's left and being the only two people with a shared history.

That literally set up one of the best places for a fucking romance to bloom. Yet the war and the circumstances just made it so hard for them to act upon it yet somehow the manga and anime were peppered with this cool understanding of

Yo I want you.

like maybe when we retire let's keep in touch and I dunno have babies or something

But yeah yo we gotta fight.

Then Levi be like “Yeah babies be a good idea?” (Titans don’t love you. I love you.)

Death foreshadowing

Then Levi

Fucking

Broken

Like we've never seen him before.

Wow isayama the madman didn't need to build this masterpiece of a relationship from love at first sight, to confessions, to placing them in unnatural situations for sexual tension.

He built a subtle relationship out of necessity, out of the need for some humanity in this dark world. Two people placed at the lead at the forefront of this war, willing to adjust, willing to change and work despite their differences because they needed that warmth, they needed the reminder that there exists happiness and hope in this world which transcends all that bullshit they have experienced to that point until her death.

I really wish I could experience that epiphany again with another couple.

I applaud the subtlety of this relationship and the natural development of one of the best ships I have experienced in a long while.

#levihan #levi x hanji #levi x hange #levi ackerman #hange zoë #hange zoe #hanji zoe #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #ship

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butgilinsky · 5 years ago

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blueberry pancakes // rc

part two | series masterlist

warning; language, angst

summary; y/n and jj get into a fight on the beach when the kooks approach her

word count; 2.2k+

her phone had been blowing up all morning, on top of the texts and calls she got last night. y/n knew she was going to walk into a burning building when she got to john b’s house the next morning, but she didn’t have much of a choice. she couldn’t bail on their plans just to hide from the inevitable conversation.

so she parked the car, hearing laughter and conversation die out at the sound of her door shutting behind her before she walked into view of the group sitting around the hammock.

“so she is alive!” john b called out, a smile on his face while the others had either annoyed or worried expressions.

“we thought you fucking died, dude. where the hell were you?” y/n didn’t want to roll her eyes at kie, knowing the girl was clueless to everything y/n had felt in the past few months, but it was difficult not to.

“i’m fine. just went home a little early.” she huffed softly before sitting beside pope, leaning her head on the boy’s shoulder. he laid his head on top of hers, not daring to interrogate the girl like the rest of her friends were about to do.

“home early? i didn’t even know you were going back home.” jj scoffed, speculating where the girl actually would have gone.

“well you don’t exactly ask, so how could you know?” it was harsher than she intended, but it was too late to stop herself. the words were slipping and the attitude was practically dripping from her lips.

“what’s got you so pissy today?” he shot back, sitting up straighter to narrow his eyes at the girl that wanted nothing more than to talk about something else right now.

“nothing, let’s talk about something else.” y/n shot john b a knowing look, to which he quickly caught onto and cleared his throat before throwing out a new topic.

sarah looked between her boyfriend and the girl, not knowing what was going on but trying to piece it together. she, unlike the others, knew that rafe had also slipped into the house late last night, but she didn’t think it was possible for the two to be connected.

y/n laid on a towel, turned up towards the sun while almost all the others were out surfing. sarah was beside her, but the two had been silent for a while so she almost forgot the girl was there.

“you sure you’re alright?” she turned towards the blonde, smiling softly and nodding.

“yeah.” sarah nodded, even though she didn’t quite believe y/n, but she was able to tell the girl didn’t want to talk about it, and she wasn’t one to push.

sarah looked up when her name was called out, sighing heavily before apologizing to y/n and joining her boyfriend in the ocean. y/n didn’t mind, besides the quick glance that caught sight of kie and jj sitting on their boards beside each other and laughing loudly at something.

on days like this she usually spent a lot of time with pope, but the boy that usually saved her from being completely left out of the group was sadly held captive by his dad for the day, roped into working on the dock. so she was alone for the day, lying on her towel by herself and facing the sun for as long as she could.

y/n looked away from her friends quickly and mumbled a string of profanities when she caught sight of an all too familiar group ready to walk past her. she let a small smile slip when she caught a certain pair of blue eyes.

she almost expected him to look away and walk past her, ignoring the previous night and pretending it never happened, but then she remembered that the kooks never walked past her without stopping to make at least one sly remark.

“little y/n all alone on the beach?” y/n rolled her eyes at topper, flipping him off on instinct.

“i’m not alone, but it’s nice to know you care so much about a little pogue, top.” he laughed to himself and looked for the other pogues, not taking too long to find them.

“who doesn’t care about the hottest pogue in town?” she scoffed loudly, prepared to completely ignore the boy standing over her, but he had other plans.

“you should come hang out with us.” she looked at the blue eyed boy, trying to decipher which rafe she was talking to, and if this was just another dig at the pogues. despite their night at the diner, she was still unsure if rafe was going to keep the anti-pogue train running or if he’d drop the act for her.

“yeah, come hang out with us. we were just walking anyways, so it’s not much different than what you’re already doing.” kelce surprised her, never sharing more than a few words with the girl at a time. kelce was the quieter one, not taking much interest into her or kiara despite his best friends always hitting on the two of them.

rafe held his hand out for her but she didn’t have any time to react to it before all eight eyes snapped in the same direction.

“is there a problem over here?” she rolled her eyes, not understanding how he could leave her alone all day long without a second thought, and suddenly pop up when someone else stops to talk to her.

“hey, jj. no problem here. we were just asking y/n if she wanted to walk with us.” the three boys wore their best smiles, beaming brightly at the blond who scoffed quickly.

“she doesn’t want to go anywhere with you, so fuck off, alright? go back to figure eight.” y/n sighed and ran a hand through her hair, knowing this was going to be a bigger deal than she wanted it to be.

“well you haven’t let her answer, pogue. so why don’t you ask y/n what she wants to do instead of choosing for her.” rafe puffed his chest out, both literally and figuratively, as he spoke.

there was no question that rafe beat almost everyone on the island when it came to size alone. the boy was tall and built, and he packed a punch. despite that, and even with his two friends at his side, y/n also knew that that jj wouldn’t hesitate to give it a shot anyways.

“i already told you, she doesn’t want anything to do with you.”

y/n shot up from her spot on her towel when jj stepped towards rafe, closing the distance between them slowly. y/n wedged herself between the boys, trying to avoid a conflict in broad daylight on a crowded beach.

“jj just back off, okay?” jj stared at her with wide eyes, anger shifting towards her at the simple suggestion.

“me? are you seriously on their side?” she rolled her eyes and let out a soft laugh at his attitude shift, knowing he was oblivious to everything around him most of the time.

“i’m not on anyone’s side, jj. i don’t want the two, or four, of you to get into a brawl in the middle of the beach, okay?” y/n tried to slyly hint at the fact that jj was wildly out numbered in this situation, but he just scoffed, not believing the words he was hearing.

“are you serious, y/n? do you want to hang out with them or something?”

“would that be a problem, jj?” she crossed her arms across her chest, shooting an eyebrow in the air as a silent challenge.

“yes, y/n! they’re fucking kooks, for crying out loud!” she laughed again, biting the inside of her cheek to suppress the anger waiting to burst.

“isn’t kiara a kook? sarah, too?” the three behind her snickered at the question, watching the way it made jj tick uncomfortably.

“that’s entirely different, y/n-”

“is it? because to me, it seems like you’re falling for a kook. god knows i’ve had to hear about for months at this point. you and john b have been macking on kooks, so what does that leave me with, jj? can’t mack on pope ‘cause he’s a pogue. though, you’re also breaking that rule.”

“you’re trying to mack on them?” he was yelling now, and y/n was sighing heavily.

“no, jj, but that’s all you can see isn’t it? i can’t be friends with kooks, i can’t-”

“they’re fucking kooks, y/n. topper tried to drown john b. rafe has hit me multiple times-”

“and i’d do it again, maybank.” y/n looked over her shoulder at the blue eyed boy, narrowing her eyes in a silent warning.

“seriously? not helping.” she hissed softly before turning back to jj. “my point, jj-”

“i don’t care, y/n. just pick.”

she narrowed her eyes at him, disbelief coursing through her veins at the short statement that held more weight than he expected it to. he was fuming, and she wasn’t even entirely sure why. nothing had even happened before he stormed into the conversation.

“jj-”

“you know what, you should go with them. i think you’d have fun being a kook.” he walked past her then, shoulder colliding with hers harshly.

she winced at the contact, pain shooting down her arm but she was able to focus on the ache in her chest more than the tingling in her shoulder. she was biting her cheek softly when john b ran up to her, confusion and hesitance in his expression.

“what the hell is going on?” he looked between her and the kooks, but y/n waved him off.

“i’m going to go. i’ll see you guys later, alright?” his eyes shifted between her and the kooks, that all wore smirks at the situation unfolding before them.

“with them?” he asked and she sent him a harsh glare.

“well sitting here by myself isn’t the most exciting activity. and it seems that i can’t speak to other human beings without it threatening my existing friendships, that are already going to shit, might i add.” she rolled up her towel and shoved it in her back quickly before slipping on the t shirt she had worn to the beach over her swimsuit.

“y/n, seriously?”

“you know what, i don’t want to hear it, okay? you can tell the rest that i’m leaving, and you can all crucify me for it later. you can also tell jj that he can fuck right off. next time he asks me a stupid fucking question like that, he’s going to be the one to pick.”

she walked past john b after that, anger seeping through her pores as she stomped away from the spot. she turned over her shoulder, holding her arms out to the three boys that were still stood in place.

“are you coming?” rafe was the first to move, a proud smirk plastered on his lips as he walked over to the girl.

“y/n’s a badass!” topper called out with a wide smile that made it impossible for y/n not to smile back.

rafe lifted the girl and threw her over his shoulder, ignoring the loud squeal that left her. she hit his back softly, begging him to put her down in fear that he would drop her, but he was just laughing at her.

“rafe, please, if you drop me i swear-”

“i’m not going to drop you, princess, calm down.” he laughed gently, finding her protests funny and cute, but also trying to reassure her.

“by the end of the day you’ll be an honorary kook, y/n.”

the next time she heard from rafe, she was working. she was babysitting two little girls on figure eight when her phone rang, almost all the way on the other side of the room.

“y/n! phone!” she looked at the five year old gripping her cell phone in her hands.

“bring it here, paige.” the girl giggled while pressing her fingers on the screen, making y/n sigh heavily before she stood up, placing the infant on her hip and walking over to the older child.

she grabbed the phone from paige’s hands and saw the little girl had accidentally answered the call from rafe. y/n sighed softly before wedging the phone between her cheek and her shoulder while bouncing the girl on her hip.

“hi, sorry about that. don’t give your phone to a five year old.” she heard rafe laugh softly through the speaker, which almost instantly made her heart melt.

“no worries, i was just wondering if you wanted to come out with me tonight? kelce is throwing this thing and he asked if you wanted to come. i guess you impress people easily.” she smile, finding it endearing that people were thinking of her.

“are you asking me to be your date to a kook party, cameron?” ava - the girl on her hip - giggled, making y/n smile wider while she tickled the small girl’s stomach.

“i guess i am.”

“then i guess i have no choice but to accept.” she put ava on the ground, watching her crawl further into the living room to where her sister sat with building blocks.

“great. i can pick you up at 9? when are you done babysitting?” she smiled at the small reminder that he listened to her talk about babysitting the girls just a few nights before.

“i should be done here around 6, so 9 works great for me.”

“great! i’ll see you at 9.”

“see you at 9.”

taglist; @queenofthebees003 @extratragic @jjtheangel @drewstarkeyobx @starkeymarkey @ilovejjmaybank @annedub @obx-j

italics means it wouldn’t let me tag you): lmk if you want to be tagged!!

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linkspooky · 5 years ago

Note

What do you think of Mahito, his role in the story's future, and what he might represent? I can't stop thinking of how he literally acts as an antithesis to Yuji (besides being his primary foil), humanity and the narrative itself and how that might mean that he is the main antagonist of Jujutsu Kaisen.

What are your thoughts on the new JJK chapter? With what Mahito said to Yuji at the start of the chapter?

Answering these asks together. Thank you both for sending them!

I’m going to center this analysis around Mahito’s statement that you are me, and his role as antithesis to Yuji as the anon stated above. There are two big ways you can interpret Mahito’s statement. They are the same in the sense that they are character foils, that Mahito is the Jungian Shadow to Yuji and all of his actions. The second one is based around the idea that Jujutsu Kaisen at large plays with Budhism, and BUdhist ideas, it’s an argument that Mahito and Itadori are spiritually the same. Not contradictory forces but complimentary, the whole of them each containing parts of the other. I’m not the best at explaining japanese budhism, because I myself am not a japanese budhist, but I will try my best under the cut.

1. Spiritually the Same

So, Mahito’s arguments are ones that require a certain amount of abstraction to make sense.

For example, is saving people the same as killing people? No, obviously not.

Alright, there’s your answer. Let’s go home, give me notes please. To understand Mahito’s argument you have to understand how far away from other living people his perspective is.

Mahito positions himself as a third party observing from afar. From his position everything has a tendency to look the same. Let me explain: if every living creature has a soul, then what gives weight to human souls?

Heart, weight, both of those are words that are essentially trying to give human lives “worth.” Are human lives “worth something?” Are they more worthy than the lives of animals, plants, curses, etc. The way Mahito sees it everything has a soul. Even plants have a soul. However, there’s nothing too different in the souls of humans, from the souls of say bugs. The only difference he himsel sees is that humans have a capacity for reason.

“The so-called dignity obtained by human reason”, humans assume their lives are more worthwhile, more dignified then say, the life of your dog, because a human has the intellectual capacity for logical reasoning and a full range of emotions on display, and your dog has been barking at his reflection in the mirror for twenty minutes because he thinks it’s another dog.

Ideas of good and evil are not natural laws of the universe. They are made up by human reason. They only exist because humans said they do, and give reasons to them. Mahito’s perspective is a natural one on the world.

The reason that humans are different from monkeys is just a quirk of evolution that enabled them to gain more brain mass over millions of years, and then gained higher amounts of intelligence. Everything else was reasoned out, ex posto facto. Humans come up with reasons why things happen after the fact, but they just happened. Humans just happened to evolve.

If the natural state of the universe is chaos, and there’s no foreseen hand guiding everything, then things that happen just happen. There is no particular meaning to them. You can make up a meaning, but who is to say one invented meaning is more important than the other?

There’s life on this planet, because we just so happened to be a certain distance away from the sun to enable an ideal climate for liquid water on the surface. Therefore, life is not some necessarily some thing that needs to be protected. It’s just there.

If both Mahito and Yuji are fighting up with their made up value of life, Mahito believing there is no value, and Yuji believing there’s value worth preserving, then Yuji needs to actually make an argument. If no objective right or wrong exists, Yuji needs to prove why he’s right, rather than insisting he’s doing the right thing without thought.

Yuji and Mahito are each other, because they both embody an ideal in the way life should be treated.

When Mahito is saying this, it’s because Yuji gives weight to human lives, but not weight to the light of curses. That is to say, Yuji is fixated on the idea of giving humans a “good death” because he believes they’re owed that dignity, but will absolutely brutalize and tear curses to pieces. This is something Gojou commented on in chapter three, HUH ISN’T IT WEIRD THAT YUJI DIDN’T REALLY GROW UP SURROUNDED BY CURSES AND ALL I NEEDED TO DO WAS GIVE HIM A KNIFE AND POINT AT THAT AND SAY GO KILL THAT THING AND HE DID IT.

Let’s say it wasn’t a curse for a moment. Let’s say Yuji wrestled and killed a tiger with his bare hands and afterwards you saw him skinning it. From a certain perspective his actions might look brutal. You killed and skinned a cat. Well, yeah, but I wouldn’t do this to a human. From a certain perspective his actions might look justified. There was an old lady nearby and I didn’t want to maul her. However, if you believe spiritually that humans are nothing special and all living things have equal dignity, Yuji killing and skinning that tiger is a violation of that dignity.

Yuji believes that humans have dignity and wants to perserve that dignity even in death. That’s not objective fact though, that’s his own personal belief that he’s fighting for.

The official translation even has Yuji call it a natural death rather than a good death. However, is Yuji just imposing what he believes to be good and insisting it’s the natural order of the world instead?

Mahito’s argument is essentially that there is no right or wrong, and therefore the two of them are just both presenting ideas. If the order of the world is one where creatures constantly consume each other in order to survive, then what is so wrong about the curses fighting it out with humans against who becomes top dog? Curses are shown to have sentience same as humans. They don’t have human kindness, or compassion but they’re capable of assigning thoughts, and reasons behind their actions the same way humans do. What makes one life more worthy for another? Mahito’s words are a challenge, to come up with some reason to defy him.

However, there’s a flaw in Mahito’s argument.

Mahito’s argument is one that states nothing is a reason. All life is equal therefore one life doesn’t matter or is worth more than the other. However, then he uses that to give himself moral permission to do whatever he want.

What do I mean by he needs moral permission?

Mahito is justifying his actions, excusing his actions, the same way that Yuji is.

The appearance of the black flash this chapter signifies that the universe is a neutral party to both Yuji and Mahito’s fight. The universe is indifferent to both of them. However, Mahito presents himself as someone who is also indifferent, and objective, when he’s not.

Mahito isn’t doing what he does for no reason at all. Mahito does it because he loves humans, while Yuji does it because he hates humans. Mahito tries to give permission to Junpei, he tries to give permission to himself. His views are not that of a true nihilist, because a nhilist wouldn’t seek permission like that. Mahito’s are that of a moral nihilist. All life is worthless, therefore I can do whatever I want with it. That’s not an expression of nihilism, or the abstract idea that there are no set goals or values to life. That’s just Mahito giving an excuse to why he wants to toy around with human life.

(Also, I don’t really understand japanese budhism from the perspective of a japanese person, so please feel free to correct me on any of this, I’m just trying to go off of what was presented in the story! I’d love to hear other people’s perspectives).

But basically what I’m talking about is expressed here by Mr. Yoshimura if you read Tokyo Ghoul.

If all life on this planet is just trying to survive, and in compettition with one another to survive, then the taking of all life is equally evil. A human killing a curse for survival, and a curse killing a human for survival is the same FROM THAT PERSPECTIVE.

However, I would argue that this assertion that “Life is Evil” is being said by a PERSON and that person is making a VALUE JUDGEMENT. Evil is an idea same as good. Life is neutral, life is random, life is indifferent, life is just atoms smashing around in pure utter chaos but it’s not necessarily evil and definitely not in the way Mahito takes it to be.

2. We’re like the Same Dude

The second is that Mahito and Yuji are character foils. They are characters in a narrative who are meant to reflect each other, specifically that of the protagonist, and their shadow.

Jung stated the shadow to be the unknown dark side of the personality. According to Jung, the shadow, in being instinctive and irrational, is prone to psychological projection, in which a perceived personal inferiority is recognized as a perceived moral deficiency in someone else.

If Yuji and Mahito were two parts of the same whole person, like two halves of the brain, Yuji would be the sensible, reasonable half, and Mahito would be the one acting on pure emotion and instinct.

Mahito and Yuji are both curse/human hybrids. They are both individuals that blur the line between humans and curses. Mahito is specifically, a curse that was created from the human fear of one another which makes him the most human of the curses and the most adept to change or growth. Yuji is a normal kid (as far as we know) who swallowed a finger, and his entire body became curse energy. He is half curse, and half human, in the regard that he is Sukuna and he is Yuji at the same time.

Yuji and Mahito are people who both embody a vague area between human and curse, a curse that acts like a human, a human that acts like a curse in vice versa, however they choose to cling onto different apsects of their being. It’s ambiguous whether or not Mahito is a humanlike curse, but Mahito himself defines himself as only ever being a curse. Just like Yuji sees himself as a human too, he sees himself as Yuji, and not Yuji and Ryomen Sukuna at the same time.

It’s Mahito who encourages the others to act more like curses, to live on impulse than desire, instead of trying to restrain themselves for the sake of reason. However, this is ironic, because the reason that Mahito is getting raised up as the leader of the curse family is because he is the mirror to humans, and is the most humanlike of all the curses.

Mahito wants to be a pure curse, but his path requires him to become more and more human. Yuji wants to be a pure human, but his path in ingesting fingers will require him to become more and more curselike as time progresses. He will over time become more Ryomen Sukuna and less Yuji Itadori until the time comes for him to be executed after ingesting all twenty fingers. They are like opposite reflections in the mirror, clinging onto opposite parts of themselves.

It’s even shown in their foiling in the Junpei arc. They both encourage Junpei to do the opposite things. Mahito encourages Junpei to follow his baser instincts and curse other people, to resent them for what they have done to him.

Yuji however, applies to Junpei’s sense of reasoning and higher thinking. He suggests there’s a better plan than Junpei’s simple acting on. He asks Junpei not to do what he thinks is best in the moment and lash out on those feelings alone like Mahito suggested, not to follow his instinct to curse, but rather try to follow reason to find who is really at fault and then punish the correct person. Yuji appeals to the fact that Junpei have both empathy for the people he’s randomly lashing out at over his own pain, and that he has the ability to separate himself from his pain and try to search for what’s right instead.

These are opposite ideas, and Mahito and Yuji clearly look at the world with completely opposite perspectives. However, these perspectives don’t contradict, they are complimentary. The existence of a shdaow doesn’t mean the conscious mind is right. The existence of the consious mind doesn’t mean the shadow isn’t there. In other words, light and shadow don’t negate each other, light cannot exist without shadow.

In less poetic words. Whenever you make any action, your good intentions are equally as valid as your bad ones. There’s no such thing as a person without bad intentions. Anything can be seen from a both good and bad light. What Mahito argues to Yuji, is that Yuji was ignoring all along how dangerous an individual he was. Yuji uses his powers to save people, and he wants to become strong, but as has been pointed out in the manga before having all that strength collected in one person can be used oppressively and violently.

This is what Getou says to Gojou. If he was Gojou he’d have the power to kill every last human being alive and spare only the sorcerers. Gojou is someone sitting on all that power. Power alone doesn’t justify itself. Equally as important is the choices and the reasoning behind wielding that power. What Mahito was pointing out, and what the plot is emphasizing is that Yuji was wielding that power, especially the power of Ryomen Sukuna in a way that was poorly thought out.

Which is the point of this scene when Yuji realized the scope of Sukuna’s rampage. Yuji didn’t seriously think of the possibility that he was a walking bomb waiting to go off. This was brought up as an argument in the Kyoto arc, that it might be safer for everyone to just kill Yuji now so Sukuna doesn’t have the chance to get out. And then. Sukuna got out. And that’s what happened.

Mahito isn’t saying that Yuji is good or bad, he’s saying Yuji hasn’t thought about what good or bad even is. Yuji only ever saw the good intention of his actions, he saw himself as a person saving others, and because of that he didn’t think properly about the risk he inherently carrying. He didn’t realize how dangerous of a person he was for carrying Sukuna around like that. Mahito is the unacknowledged shadow of Yuji’s actions, following him through the plot, and punishing him for his ignorance.

Yuji is a good kid, but sadly the nature of the universe being true neutral good intentions don’t always lead to good results. It’s just a burden that Yuji has to think about, and carry with him as he moves on. Which I really, really want him to do. Yuji can think more, live on and live with his regrets, and still try to do the right thing even after enduring all of this because that’s what makes him human.

Just like how all reasons for fighting are made up, humans are able to make up whatever reason they want to keep fighting. It goes both way. If all lives have equal weight. You don’t have to take it from Mahito’s perspective that they’re worth nothing. You can also take it from Yuji’s perspective, that every life is worth fighting for, worth living, because you and I are worth just as much as one another.

#Anonymous #jjk meta #this is going to be really abstract and nihilistic because it's mahito #sorry #jujutsu kaisen meta #mahito #yuji itadori #itadori yuji #yuji analysis #yuji meta #metasks #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen mahito #jujutsu kaisen theory

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saksukei · 5 years ago

Text

mermaid yeosang au

[plenty of curses lol and also this is hella long ,,,,, so I'm sorry] This was once again inspired by warmau, please check them out! I love their writing.

other mermaid aus; yunho san

when your friends said you were a dumb fuck you begged to differ but now you just agree

because really– you have proved how low your IQ level is when you went to the beach

It was a cloudy day and it was supposed to rain later on but you and your friends were already at the beach– so you decided you might as well enjoy

you wanted to go for a swim but all your friends refused and said that they preferred to stick to the shallow water

you went in for a swim in the deep water, where the waves form because you go out to swim pretty often ,,,, especially this place

but then it started raining cats and dogs

and the current started becoming stronger

your grade A swimming skills couldn't save you because even as you were trying to swim against the current, the water was just sweeping you away

The only thing you could hear were your friends screaming for the one second you managed to get out and then you were back in

salt water going through your nose

and you felt like this was it

because getting out of the water is impossible and you've heard countless stories of people drowning, never thinking you were going to go be one of them

and this isn't some movie where you get washed up on some shore on an island and find your way back home

and so you just let the water take you with itself

Till you felt a strong grip on your wrist

you couldn't see clearly because the salt water and the sand was hurting your eyes

but you felt something wrap it's arms around you tightly and drag you away with full force

you felt everything fade away as you lost consciousness

you eyes fluttered open and you jolted up

you found yourself on this flat rock on some unknown shoreline?

“oh good– you're up,” you heard someone say from behind you.

You turned around to see a white haired boy, prominent cheek bones, angular face, melanin skin, a weak smile on his lips

and then you noticed–

the huge gash that went from his ankle to almost his knee

“w-what ,,,,, how did this happen? Are you okay?” you asked, worryingly, as you inched closer to him.

“oh I'm a hundred percent fine!” he replied in a sarcastic tone, pointing towards his leg

hE SOUNDED LIKE A WHINY BITCH

“rude,” you hissed, as you tore your sleeve, wrapping it around his leg to cover the wound

“please stop– this ,,, it won't help,” he pointed towards the bandage.

“i know it's not great but it'll be worse if I don't do this now,” you answered.

“no you don't understand,” he interrupted, his tone stern.

“what do I not understand? This is one of the things I've been taught to do in case someone gets wounded and this prevents bacterial infection from happening–”

“I'm a mermaid,,,,,,” he confessed.

and you stopped dead in your tracks

“y-youre a ,,,,, what?” you asked him again

“don't tell anyone please,” he grumbled. “I don't want a fanclub”

“oh my god ,,,, you're a mermaid but you're also a dick, congrats!” you replied, clearly annoyed.

I MEAN WHO DOES THIS GUY THINK HE IS???

and he just rolled his eyes

“why don't you just tell me how I can help because I don't want to be responsible for murder,” you hissed.

Yeosang scoffed and kept thinking of a solution, till an idea popped into his mind, a smile on his face

You could see the light bulb over his head

“well- there are these things we use to heal and keep ourselves strong ,,,,, they're a type of seashell.....”

“oh god– this will be like finding a needle in a haystack,” you sighed.

“no actually the shell is the color of my tail which is emerald green, with white lines and we don't carry these shells with us, but rather– they find us when we are in need,” he explained.

“so can't it just ,,,,,, I don't know pop out of the ocean right into my arms?”

“if that's how it worked, do you think I would have entertained you all that long?”

“fine, you win,” you admitted, gritting your teeth

“dont hit your head on the rocks or drown like you did before–” he jabbered.

“you know ,,,,, I really miss two minutes ago when I didn't know your existence,” you retorted, as you dived into the water, missing the smirk on his face

After several minutes, you found the shell and you swam back to the silver haired boy

aND HE WAS SURPRISED AS FUCK?

“y-you found the shell?” he gulped

“yeah, why do you sound so panicky?” you asked, as you handed it to him, noticing the change in his tone

“nothing,” he scoffed. “I thought your intelligence quotient was so low that you would drown again,”

You only huffed in annoyance as you watched the gash on his leg disappear in an instant

“how did you get hurt anyway?”

“i was trying to save your dumbass from drowning.....”

he stood up and mans was taller than you

“the wound is fixed, the attitude comes right out huh?” you snapped.

“this isn't attitude, this is just–”

“no, you're just a jerk face” you interrupted, getting up.

Before you could utter another word, in one swift motion he grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards him

“first of all, it's not jerk face– it's Kang yeosang and second of all, I didn't have to injure myself just to save your petty ungrateful ass, but I still did.”

“well, god wanted me dead and now you get to find out why,” you managed to choke out, hoping he wouldn't notice how fAST YOUR HEART WAS RACING

He let go of your wrist as he rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time

“do you want to get back home or not?”

“yeah, so that I can forget your existence.”

He mumbled a ‘fine’ and jumped into the water

and you jumped after him

you could see his dark emerald green tail and as it came to the middle part, it become almost white, similar to his hair color

“hold on tight and pray that I don't strangle you,” he wrapped his arms around you and held you close to his chest

I mean ,,,,,, dude was a dick but he looked hELLA FINE AND YALL SEE HIS CHEST??

he swam at literal lightning speed like you were there before you even knew it??

the storm had passed and you could see lifeguards, friends and family on the shoreline

You were in still water, small waves here and there but nothing too strong

“the coast guard is going to come here for another round to search for you–pretend you're unconscious and just let your body float,” he instructed.

“what if I get only farther and farther away from the shore?” you asked and he rolled his eyes

“you need to stop asking me stupid questions ,,,,, and- I'll be here to supervise.”

“okay then um- thank you ,,,, yeosang.”

“you're welcome–” he let go of your body and you let your body float on the water, till you felt a boat near by, eventually taking you out of the water

you eventually pretended to regain consciousness and was happy to be reunited with everyone

you also got scolded by everyone but you felt as if something was missing

sure you didn't like yeosang but he still saved you and you just ,,,,, kinda liked having him around even if he was annoying

I mean he made your heart race and get you all giddy for some ,,,,,, reason

this incident happened a little over a month ago and you spent all your time missing yeosang?? even though you like barely knew him and he was a dick lol

you went back to the beach, without anyone around and just walked along the shoreline till you felt your foot hit something

it was emerald in color?

yeosang's shell??

was he in trouble?

you panicked internally because you hoped he was okay

you picked up the shell and looked around,

but you still couldn't see him

you saw a rather large rock so you decided to swim towards it in hopes of trying to spot him from the top

and you got there but unfortunately the rock was too steep and slippery and so you were trying to find an edge where you could get on top from

unaware that Yeosang was watching you struggle and grinning at your stupidity

“you do realize– I have been looking for that ,,,, every where,” you heard someone say, making your heart race and you ended up bumping into his chest ,,,,, again

“you dick– if you were here ,,,, why couldn't you help me?”

“sorry it was fun watching you struggle–” he smirked

“rude– but I found your shell so- are you okay?” you asked with geniuine concern

He sighed, “oh god- I have to tell you something....”

“what?”

“you see ,,,,, I had originally sent you on a wild goose chase when I sent you to find my shell–”

“what do you mean?”

“actually no one except the mermaids themselves can find their own shell,” he scratched the back of his head. “unless–” he paused.

“unless?”

“unless they are your significant other....”

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