#i write... crazy!!! haven't done that in almost a year. be nice 2 me

[iamskadhi]

Story of a villain - Part 2

Hi, Dabi stans, here is the translation of the second part of my fanfiction (it isn't posted anywhere else, btw)

In case you haven't read or want to read the Part 1 of Story of a villan.

As I mentioned before, it is written from a male POV (Dabi's POV), it has a explicit smut parts, includes a little self-loathing, original characters (but the female lead doesn't have a name so you can pretend it's you)

I decided to use the word "part" instead of "chapter" because I actually merged a lot of small chapters I've written before, I'm trying to make it fit in 3 parts so this is the middle of the whole thing and I'm going to say that is so satisfying to write a love story this way, I've never done this before and I highly recomend it now.

The first part has +7000 words and this part has +8000 words, there are no big descriptions of places or time because I tried to write it as a light novel, feel free to send me messages to correct my gramar or if you have any comment about the times not making sense or anything else.

Anyway, I hope you like it.

PART 2

Slowly, we became more than what we were already: a chosen family. Together we found an apartment – smaller than her former place, but nicely located – and for almost a month, I managed to kill most of my old habits, but it costed me, the old me was screaming in the back of my mind next to my thirteen-year-old corpse.

Some nights, we talked about the future before sleeping and I noticed the way she smoothed the ground, patiently helping me to feel safe and at home; she had no idea my home is wherever she is.

Then, I got a job under a fake name. I went from drug dealing in dark alleys to torturing people and now I was a security guard at a downtown club known as Beanie and One Day.

“You’re sketchy as fuck” said the manager, a mid-forty man named Tanaka Haru, “can you throw jerks out the door?”

“I’m not that strong”, I admitted.

He doubted, but I got the job. I got the name, the place, the girl; but it wasn’t good enough, I wasn’t satisfied at all; and only to make things worse, her mother came to our place one morning after my babe went to work, she looked around and tried to bribe me to leave her daughter alone.

“I love your daughter,” I told her clearly.

“You’re ruining her life!” she accused me. “I talked to her father and if you don’t get out of her life for good, he’ll remove her from the company”

I grinned and she looked at me as if I was crazy.

“You wouldn’t. You care too much about what other people thinks”

“Oh, believe me, we would and we will take her out of the country after that, so don’t get too comfortable in this dumpster you brought her to live with you. Take the money, you clearly need it if this is the best you can get” she disappeared ­— she had a teleportation quirk too.

I looked out the window, a black car that was park outside started up and fled immediately; that was probably hers. I wanted to burn the card and money she left, but I let it there, kept the card in my pocket.

When my babe came home, I noticed she was upset too.

“Wanna eat outside?” she asked me.

As we walked, she started to point out all of the benefits of the new place, it made me sad how hard she was trying to convince herself she was okay without all of her privileges.

I couldn’t keep it in anymore:

“Your mom visited” She stopped walking, so I stood there too, “Did you talked to your father today?”

“What did she say?”

Something horrible was going on inside her head, it was obvious, I showed her the card.

“She offered money to separate us”, I burned it “She said you were supposed to go to your parent’s house that night, but I guess you knew that already.”

“I finally got you” she said, “I got you, I can’t be the one who leaves. I started over, I’m adapting”

“No, you’re not”

“Yes, I am!” she looked at me, her gaze was reddish, irritated, I sighed.

“Did you cry today, baby?”

“Don’t treat me like a kid!” she ran her hands through her hair in exasperation.

“I’m not doing that, I see it in your eyes.”

She swore she was fine, but it wasn’t true. After eating, we took the long way home, as we walked in the building her mother’s words resonated in my mind: “you’re ruining her life”.

My babe smiled at me when we entered, put her arms around my neck and kissed me deeply, I closed the door behind us… and clothes started falling on the floor.

If she could smile like that and still embrace me as tenderly as she just did, how could I still believe that her mother was right? I totally screwed her and she was happy with it.

“You still haven’t got your period, you should get tested,” I suggested her when we were done.

“Are you worried?” she put on my shirt.

“I don’t wanna be like our parents”

“Me neither, but it’s too soon to know”

It was killing me and I wondered how she managed to keep it cool and if she even wanted to have kids. I never asked, we never talked about it, I assumed it was off the table.

My heart ached just thinking about it.

Doing a regular job was way boring than I thought it would be, but it helped get my mind distracted; at the end of the shift, the bartender –a mid-thirty man named Haruma— would serve some drinks and the manager  pointed out all the things that should be improved.

“You’re new” I heard a soft voice behind me, a girl’s voice, one of the girls that dance around the place to keep a fun mood sat next to me.

“Hey, Momo, I didn’t see you tonight” Haruma smiled at her, brought another glass for her.

“I kept sober tonight, there are less jerks lately,” she said looking at me.

“Thanks to the new guy!” the manager put his thumbs up for me.

“I suspected it”, she smiled “I’ve been watching you, you got a big reputation”

“He does?” Haruma asked. I tensed.

“Yeah, girl’s notice his cute face and whisper about his scars, how did you get them?”

She pissed me, but the bartender was paying attention.

“Did it myself”

“How?” she wanted to know.

“That’s none of your business”

“I heard you got a fire quirk, Miura” Haruma was too amicable for his own good.

“Really?” Momo giggled. I just nodded and she put her hand on my arm. “I got a water quirk”

I pulled my arm away and jump up the chair immediately; she literally watered me and soaked my jacket sleeve.

“The fuck’s wrong with you?!”

She laughed and grinned.

“I guess we’re not compatible”

I could see that she was insane and I shouldn’t even look at her but she annoyed me.

“Momo, are you okay?!” the manager yelled from the other side of the club.

“That was uncalled for, Momo” the bartender reprimanded her, “Don’t take it bad, Miura, she’s not good socializing, that’s all”

“Put a sign on her next time!” I exclaimed.

“Oh, I can’t wait for the next time” she giggled.

“Don’t be rude” Haruma reproached her again.

I just left. It was still dark; when I got home, my babe was sleeping. We spent little to no time together since I got this job; I took a shower before getting into bed with her and she opened her beautiful sparkly eyes as I laid next to her.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered “Didn’t mean to wake you up”

“How was your night?”

“It was fine”

“Good” she mumbled and closed her eyes again. I tucked her hair behind her ear and she sighed, “You smell nice”

I cuddled her and fell asleep in a minute.

The smell of something very delicious woke me up, I went to the kitchen and saw Hana.

“I’m sorry, were we being too loud?” my babe asked. I shook my head, still sleepy.

“It was the bacon, right? Come, sit” Hana was cooking. “I like your new apartment, it’s close to where I live so I thought I could come and eat breakfast together, I didn’t mean to disturb. It’s nice to see you’ve taken care of your skin” she walked to me and analyzed my face, “but I see a couple of dots near under your eyes, they don’t look like moles”

“It’s nothing,” I said and she left it.

I ate in silence and went back to bed, but I could still hear them talk:

“Did you tell him?” Hana asked.

“No, he won’t take it well”

“You should tell him, though”

I swallowed the bad feeling and slept, but I didn’t rest well.

“What could it be?” I thought before falling asleep, “Did she get tested?”

It clicked my mind: she was pregnant, it was obvious and expected —not “we wanted this” type of expected, but “it had to happen” type. I cooked dinner and waited for her.

Time passed slowly, I called her and she didn’t answer; it’s something that never happens.

“Where are you?” Sent.

A few minutes later, she was writing.

“With Hana” Read.

“At the hospital?” Sent.

“At her place” Read.

I had a bad feeling.

“You OK?” Sent.

“Of course, my love. See you later” Read.

I wasn’t gonna let it slide. I had Hana’s phone number; I just never sent her a text or called her before. No, I did when they were in high school— I thought and called her:

“Hi, hi” she answered.

“Hi, are you having dinner or something?” I asked.

“Who’s this?” she asked, “Oh, Dabi, hi, why do you ask me that?”

I swallowed my saliva as I realized.

“You’re not together”

“I feel like I missed something, I’m sorry, I’m at ER right now and you called me out of the blue…”

“What were you talking about this morning?” I wanted to know.

“This morning? You were there”

“When I left you two alone, that one thing I won’t take well”

There was a brief silence.

“I’m gonna tell you, but act like you don’t know, okay?”

“Why?”

“It’s not that bad. You know the way her parents are and she had to do this, believe me, she didn’t have a choice, well she did but the other choice was something totally irrational and…”

“Spill it, Hana”

“They set her a date with some wealthy prick, she already knows him from college and he’s an idiot, she had to go, trust me, trust her, she’ll just go to dinner with him tonight and it’s done, please don’t freak out”

“Where?”

“I don’t know” she mumbled, “I swear. She mentioned it but I’ve never been there, it’s new and stylish, the kind of place her mom adores; I just know it opened this week”

That was the only clue I needed.

“Do you know when they’re supposed to meet?”

“Please just let it slide, they must be there already, she’ll be home real soon”

“Thanks” I hung up. I had to see the wealthy prick.

If they met in college I had someone in mind, I hated thinking about it. Searched online for newly opened restaurants and went straight to the one that looked more stupidly pompous.

It had big fucking crystal doors but no windows, I had to go in; the host welcomed me with a fake smile:

“I’m sorry. We have a dress code, sir”

I ignored her and walked in, looking around, she followed me, heard some gasps and I saw them. I fucking saw the same asshole that used to stalk her back in college and felt the anger heating inside my chest.

A waiter addressed me: “I’m sorry, gentleman, but you have to respect…”

“Who’s manning that table?” I pointed them.

“I’m sorry again; I can’t give you that info…”

I walked to them, she hadn’t see me but I stopped when she stood up and spilled her wine on his face. He got up too, a waiter jumped in offering a napkin and I hurried to the table.

“You’re still the same immature little girl, I see” the prick said walking towards her, I reached him just in time, put my hand on his shoulder.

“Long time no see, fucking loser”

She widened her eyes surprised; she really didn’t noticed I was there until now.

“Who the fuck are you?” he looked at me confused; I grinned and let a little blue blaze out my hand on his shoulder.

“You forgot about me? That’s sad, I remember you perfectly, fucking asshole”

He squealed like a little bitch, I perfectly saw in his eyes when he remembered; she jumped in and pushed me back.

“Dabi, let’s go” she said while pushing me “Let’s go, let’s go”

I let go of his shoulder and stepped back, grinning like a devil, mad as fuck:

“Damn, you’re lucky we’re at a fancy place!”

“Please, let’s go!” she took my hand and pulled me, we rushed out of the restaurant, when we were outside I confronted her:

“Why did you do this?”

“Why did you do that?!” she reproached me.

“No, there’s no possible way you can turn this on me, what the fuck happened?”

She looked at me as if she was completely out of her mind before turning her back on me, and walked away.

“Where the fuck are you going?” I followed her.

“Home! I need to change!”

“You need to explain!”

“No! How did you find out?” she bawled, “Why are you here? Why…?”

I reached her hand and stopped her, people walked around but I had to see her face; she was turning red but she wasn’t crying.

“What would you have done if I hadn’t been there?” I asked calmly.

“I would’ve teleported out of there,” she said, but I know she wouldn’t have done that. “I would’ve go home, like I’m trying to do now” she hugged herself.

She was gorgeous; wearing a red dress and her hair up, she looked like a movie star or a model. I really wanted to fight for this, but I also wanted to take her home and make love to her fully dressed like that.

“You asked Hana, didn’t you?” she looked at me, still upset, and I nodded.

“Let’s go home,” I said, put my arm around her waist and walked with her.

“Yeah, I really wanna change” she mumbled.

“No, keep it” I said with a smirk and I saw her smiling too.

“Wanna take shortcuts?” she asked and pulled me to the first dark alley we saw.

Teleporting with her was like jumping, except you don’t feel the fall; she wrapped her arms around me. When I first met her she could teleport in a radio of fifty meters —she was awesome��, by now she can do over a kilometer, maybe two.

We’ve done this before and I trusted her, but it still made my legs wiggle, she kissed me with each jump, avoiding street lights, avoiding CCTVs, when we were near the building, she stopped and I felt my legs wiggling like jelly.

She mocked me but I didn’t mind; we ran to the apartment like kids running home after school, this was the kind of things that made me fall for her despite… everything. When I’m with her, the rest of the world vanishes.

We made out in the elevator and barely managed to open the door in-between all the kissing, laughing and touching. We were role-playing and she was being incredibly clumsy.

“Oh no, mister robber, please don’t hurt me with your giant… tool.”

We laughed. She was doing it on purpose, no matter how serious I tried to be, she was faking a voice, she had to be a dummy.

“I’m sorry to disappoint you but the only valuable thing in this place is me”

I gazed her body up and down. What a woman, I thought and I took my jacket off.

“So what would you do if I went to touch you now?” I aimed to touch her waist and she stepped back grinning, very professional. I bit my lip.

“Oh no, please, my husband will be back soon!” she exclaimed.

“Then I gotta hurry” I touched her arm and she teleported us to the bed, I wasn’t expecting it but kept it cool and took my shirt off, I felt her hands going up touching my abdomen, “Stay in character, honey”

“Shit, nooo, mister robber, what are you doing to me?” she said as I took her underwear down her legs.

“Enough is enough!” I couldn’t keep it together anymore, kissed her deeply, suck her tongue into my mouth while putting two fingers inside her, and massaged her clitoris with my thumb. The red dress was almost as soft as her skin.

She moaned and undid the button of my jeans. I wanted to scold her for being so bad at role-playing but it could wait ‘till morning. We had a rope in the nightstand for this kind of situations; I tied her wrists together and let my jeans fall down.

She looked at me with thirsty eyes as I put on a condom and let a sigh out when I dived deep inside her; I kept a hand down on her hips and covered her mouth with the other while licking and sucking her precious neck all the way from her collarbone to her ear.

Soon, I forgot about the role-play too, kissing her deeply while she clawed her fingers on my hips and pulled me in desperately as I pulled out; she already wanted to come. I pulled out and turned her on her stomach, she lift her ass and I dived into her again while playing with her clitoris.

She buried her face on the pillow and I left my weight fall a little on her, put my ear on her scapula and felt her taking long deep breaths. I felt her loose strength as she was coming done. I pulled out, still hard as fuck, to allow her to turn around.

“I think we ripped the dress” she sighed.

“Shit, I loved this dress”

“I could tell how much you loved it” she said when I untied her wrists and checked the hour. “If you’re getting late, let’s make it worth”

She gave me that smile she has when she’s expecting another round.

That night my pay was deducted a thirty percent, but I was so satisfied that it could’ve been completely deducted and I wouldn’t mind.

The next few days felt like a honeymoon, not only because the sex, everything was suddenly working out. I spent so many years thinking I would never fit into a normal lifestyle, obsessed about heroes and becoming the best of them... Or maybe I’m very printable, I thought.

I was obsessed with the hero’s path because my father was a hero himself. He is still a hero. Now I was living with someone that always lived a regular life and I could live like that only because of her.

“Did you ever think about becoming a hero?” I asked her. She looked at me, confused.

“We’ve had this talk before”

I remembered the first time that I saw her, she was training her quirk behind her parent’s back. She was too mad at them because her life was made since the day she was born, she didn’t have siblings like me because her mother hated being pregnant, therefore she had no voice in their house. Training her quirk at a crack house was her only rebellious phase.

That and dating me.

“How could you fall for me?” I asked.

She laughed.

“Remember that day I jumped off the roof and you screamed you loved me? You already knew I can teleport anywhere, anytime, but you were so desperate thinking I was trying to kill myself. We were messed up kids who taught ourselves how to live, how could we ever just be friends?”

That was an embarrassing memory, I really believed she was done with her life and her parent’s expectations and I ran upstairs to that roof. She jumped before my eyes and my hands couldn’t reach her, of course I was desperate and I screamed.

“You were so cute” she sipped her cup of coffee with an annoying grin.

“If you’re pregnant I’m telling that story someday”

She stared at me, blushing until her face turned all red.

“You manipulated me” I said and she laughed.

“Maybe I did” she admitted. “I liked you but I never thought you loved me”

On my day off, I went to the mall attempting to buy a coffeemaker like the one my babe had before, but of course, I couldn’t afford the exact same machine so I had to buy the next best option.

I was waiting in line to pay, when I notice the woman in front of me had white hair with red stripes. It’s not possible, I thought, chill – but I couldn’t resist myself and tried to look at her face. She noticed and looked back.

“I’m sorry” she said immediately when she made eye contact - took me by surprise, “are you in a hurry? My cart’s full, you can pass before me” she offered politely.

“I’m good” I said. That was definitely my sister.

“Okay” she said and she looked at me timidly, it made me wonder…

“What’s the matter?”

If maybe, she did recognize me.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to stare at you like that” she stuttered. “It’s just…” she looked at my black hair “that you look like someone that I miss”

She’s lying, I thought and swallowed my saliva nervously, stay calm, stay calm.

“What?” I asked.

Don’t fuck things up, do it for her.

“Someone that I knew, I meant someone that I knew,” she lied, “I’m sorry, I felt nostalgic for a moment, you can go before me, seriously,” she offered again.

“Fine” I said as I walked by her side, “thanks”

“You’re welcome” she smiled.

Not only my hair or my piercings, my voice is different, I thought, but she knows. I looked over my shoulder and she smiled.

Or maybe I’m losing my grip again. Forget it, forget them.

Back home, I questioned myself if I should place the coffeemaker as if it has always been here or if I should’ve wrapped it with a bow and all.

I called Hana and she laughed at me.

“I’m sorry, that’s so cute. I think you should place it there and count the minutes, we can make a bet about how long it will take her to notice”

“She’s a caffeine maniac, she’ll notice immediately”

“Na-uh, it’ll take her like ten minutes at least, pregnancy makes woman very absent-minded. I can see her using the French press and then…”

“What?”

“What?” she shut the fuck up.

“That thing you said about pregnancy”

There was a brief silence and she said nervously:

“Oh no! A car crashed somewhere and I need to go, bye”

I stayed standing like an idiot for a couple of minutes, staring at the coffeemaker. It wasn’t like I didn’t suspected it or I didn’t know, but the fact that Hana knew her period was late and seemed to have confirmed she was pregnant didn’t sit well.

I felt betrayed.

Searched online everything about pregnancy symptoms, I also felt curious about what to do with a newborn, I read everything I found and it was so much to handle, I felt the urge to throw up.

“I can’t do this” I said to myself while scrolling down my phone’s screen. I remembered my father. “I won’t be like him”

Rage filled in. I tried to picture it: the baby, a real baby.

What if they have my quirk?

What if they have my weakness?

I felt the urge to leave.

If they don’t have a quirk, it’d be fine.

If they have my babe’s quirk, it’d be fine.

My mind was tricking me, asphyxiating me.

I put my phone on the table and left the apartment, walked around the building, then wandered further and faster; almost running.

I saw a couple of those stupid heroes on the other side of street.

What if they want to be a hero?

I couldn’t take it anymore. I stopped walking.

“My love?” I heard her voice, but couldn’t see her. “Dabi. What are you doing here?”

I looked around, everything was numb and she appeared before me. Perfectly normal, glowing eyes looking in mine, she took my hand and intertwined our fingers.

“What’s wrong?” she asked. “Tell me”

She was like gravity, bringing me back down to the cold hard ground.

I can’t fuck this up, I thought. I pulled her closer to me and whispered in her ear:

“I missed you”

“I’ve got something to tell you” she whispered back.

“I’ve got a gift for you”

She smiled.

On the way home, I told her about my little trip to the mall, she listened careful; she could be strange and mad, but she always understood when it comes to me – to my family’s mess. Even though we were raised in completely different types of asylums.

“Welcome home, cheater” I said when we were walking inside the apartment, she looked at me as if I was crazy.

“What?” she asked.

“Hana told me” I crossed my arms trying to look dead serious “Is she the father?”

She realized and burst out laughing.

“What’s so funny?” I asked her, she was holding her stomach and covering her mouth but couldn’t hold it in.

“I’m so-I’m sorry” she laughed and laughed, completely out of control, “I was gonna get so angry if you were accusing me for real of cheating. You can be so dramatic sometimes, I love you”

“When where you gonna tell me?” I wanted to know.

“Well, you know, I was gonna walk in with a baby one day and…” I stared at her, I was done with the jokes and she saw it in my face “My love, I just found out, I swear”

“When?”

“Hana took the blood sample and she sent me a message with the results this morning, I promise you I was gonna tell you at dinner”

I gasped for air and pointed at the box in the kitchen.

“Oh my God, Dabi!” she covered her mouth and jumped in excitement like a kid, “thank you, thank you, thank you!” she hugged me before unpacking it.

She looked so happy. Then, I remember what I read about caffeine during pregnancy and tried to take it away.

“I’m returning it” I said.

“What?!”

“Caffeine isn’t good for the baby” I lifted the coffee machine when she tried to take it back from my hands, “You’re gonna settle with a cup per day from now on”

“HELL NO!”

She turned into a demon in order to take over the coffeemaker again. What did I just get into?, I thought as I found myself losing a battle to her for the first time in forever. I sat out the door in the hallway during thirty minutes until she forgave me for trying to do things right.

A week passed but I felt frozen in time, she made an appointment for an echography and I knew I had to go, I said I would, but I missed it. She didn’t say anything, she didn’t showed me anything, as if it didn’t happen.

I could feel when I’d come back from work, every time I laid in bed next to her she’d wake up and stare at me. I felt the silent pressure of her gaze and for a fortnight, there we were acting indifferent to each other. No sex, no fights, no talking.

One night after work, I was with the bartender, killing time, when our boss joined us:

“So… ho-how are you?” he asked me directly.

“Fine”

“I’ve been thinking the same thing” Haruma said, “but he doesn’t open up no matter how much whiskey I put…”

“Whiskey?” Tanaka gave him a look, discontent, tired and sighed making a sign to pour a glass for him before turning back to me “Anyway, you’ve done a decent job but lately, you’re scaring the clients – real clients, not just your target clients, it’s not good for the business”

Maybe they can relate, I thought, maybe I should let a wall down.

Our boss was expecting me to say something and Haruma was really bad at pretending he wasn’t into the conversation.

“Do you… have children?” I asked in a very low tone.

“Fuck no” the manager puffed.

“No, no, no, no” Haruma shook his head frenetically, then he asked with a childish smile “Is your girlfriend pregnant?”

I didn’t answer.

“Kids are cool, I dated a single mom once,” he continued.

“Hey, don’t say weird things” Tanaka scolded him.

“But it’s true! She was older…” Haruma started a narrative but he was too into himself that he didn’t notice no one was paying attention.

“Now I understand” my boss seemed concerned, “How do you feel about it? Shock? Sad? Wanna go and buy cigarettes?”

I looked down, he was seeing right through me.

“I should give her a call” Haruma finished his story with a longing sigh. “Hey is it true woman turn lustful when they’re pregnant?”

I gave him a cold stare and he made a face, realizing he fucked up.

“I’ve seen you picking up girls almost every night, how come you haven’t gotten anyone pregnant?” I asked him and the manager scolded him again, attempting to hit him from across the table.

“I’ve told you to stop a fucking thousand times, that’s why they never come back! You fucking piece of shit!”

“Dabi, how could you?” Haruma avoided every hit like he was used to this.

“And ain’t you married?” I addressed Tanaka, he had a wedding ring on his finger.

“Yes, to a man” he said resolute.

“I’m sorry we can’t advise you, Dabi”

“You’re on your own, kid” the manager patted my shoulder while pouring some more whiskey for himself.

“But I’m curious about something” Haruma put his face on his hand, awkwardly close to mine. “Are you in love?”

His breath hit my nose; the manager sighed and I couldn’t shut up: “I am madly in love, I cannot breath when she’s not near, I love her”

“Aww that was sweet” Haruma smiled.

“You could’ve been a detective if you’d stayed at school” the manager said to Haruma.

“Yeah, but bartending is fun” Haruma said with a sly grin. I looked at him confused, and he explained immediately: “My quirk forces people to be brutally honest. One day I asked my father why he was mean to me and he said he hated me because I killed my mom during labor”

Our boss lighted a cigarette for himself.

“You know it’s not true”

“Well I didn’t kill her, it’s not possible, but she died and he blamed me my whole life. I dropped high school and left his house, I’ve been on my own since then”

“So you’re in love, that’s why Momo couldn’t pull you up” Tanaka smiled at me, “that’s a relief, she’s the reason I had to fire the guy before you”

“That and he was also a jerk” Haruma said.

“He was tall and strong…”

“I hated him!” Haruma insisted.

“He was perfect for the job until she messed with him!”

“Then why didn’t you fire her? He was an asshole, you just can’t admit it because he’s your type!”

They started and argument and I had to leave. It was early; the daylight was clearing the streets as I was walking home. If I was so in love and if I had pictured us as a family before, why was I so nervous? Why did I feel like I could go away on my own at any given minute?

I stayed in the living room for a moment, took a bath and went back to the couch; she came out of the room and looked at me.

“Are you okay?” she asked. My body moved by itself, walked towards her and hugged her, “Did something bad happen?”

“I never asked you how you feel about this. I never asked you if you want this. I assumed you were fine because I’m here but I have no idea what’s going on or what to do to make things right”

In other words, I was an idiot.

She hugged me back, her nose snorted and I felt her crying on me as she ranted:

“I had no idea how to talk about this, I feel like a mess! I’m not doing good at my job and I can’t handle a household even when this is a smaller place. The other day I said ‘hi’ to a baby in the street and he cried! Then I cried and his mom was so nice, she comforted me when the baby stopped crying!”

She started to say unintelligible things and I just nodded and patted her back as she continued:

“What, when and how am I supposed to tell my parents? My mom is gonna bully me so hard if I cry when my own baby cries!”

She cried long and loud for good thirty minutes before getting ready for work, she used a couple of cold spoons to deflate her puffy eyes.

I was tired but I could barely sleep. I felt curious about Haruma’s quirk and how much information he could get out of anybody.

“I learned the hard way that pushing people’s boundaries is a double edge sword,” he told me. I thought it was because of his father, but he continued: “One time I took a girl home, I used to ask them what kind of stuff they like…“

He kept talking, he reminded me of Hana and despite I liked them both, I would never put them in the same room together.

“So, who is it?” he asked, “Your girlfriend?” I didn’t say anything and he smiled, “bring her one night, I’ll make some alcohol-free cocktails just for her and I’ll ask her whatever you wanna know, but… don’t resent me later”

Our boss appeared behind him and hit the back of his head.

“Don’t listen to a word he says, whatever you’re planning don’t do it” he warned us.

“Tanaka!” Haruma bawled, rubbing where he was hit.

“I heard ‘bring her’ and I don’t care who you’re talking about, you better don’t bring anyone to meet this slut man”

“Tanaka, that’s rude!” Haruma cried louder.

“Don’t be like this, Tanakun, let him bring her” Momo sat next to me, “I’m curious about the type of girl this idiot likes” She gave me a shiver “how many girlfriends did you say you’ve had?”

“I didn’t say” I said as I stood up to leave.

“See you tomorrow, Dabi!”

Haruma and our boss said goodbye, but as soon as I was walking out, I felt somebody following me. She didn’t even hide.

“Stop the stalking” I told her when she approached me.

“It’s not stalking, I’m just walking in the same direction that you are” she defended herself, but this wasn’t the first time she tried to follow me.

“Okay, walk then” I made a sign with my hand to let her pass in front of me and she smiled.

“Are you going to walk behind me? Do you like that kind of stuff, Dabi, chasing pretty girls on lonely streets?”

“There are no pretty girls in this street, just go your own way” I said as I walked back to the club, but she didn’t left me alone.

“You’ve never had another girlfriend, have you?” she asked, “Maybe you should sleep with other girls so you could see that sex isn’t a fucking big deal, you don’t have to run away from me all the time!”

I arrived and saw Haruma and Tanaka closing the door.

“Did you forget something?” Tanaka asked, but I shook my head.

“Where you going? Wanna share a taxi?” Haruma asked.

They lived in the opposite direction, but I nodded. Haruma complained a lot in the back of the taxi, he was saying it’s my fault that he had to share a taxi with Tanaka; I fell asleep.

I woke up when we arrived at Tanaka’s house. Haruma was there:

“I thought I’d have to carry you” he sighed in relief.

I tried to leave, but they didn’t let me.

“I know where you live” Tanaka said, “You’re running away from something. What is it? You forgot to collect laundry?”

Haruma laughed: “Married people are a different breed”

“We’re not married,” I said.

“Yet” Haruma said. “Oh! Tanaka, your husband”

A mutant came out of a room, a big, tall man with two pairs of arms and eyes. I tried not to stare.

“We didn’t mean to wake you up, Beanie, sorry” Tanaka said, but his husband said it was fine, they went to the kitchen and I noticed he was staring at me.

I smirked when I realized why the club’s name is Beanie and One Day.

“Do you know each other?” Haruma asked me and I denied it.

I started to receive a couple of messages from my babe.

“Don’t worry. See you at home soon” Sent.

“That’s not right” Haruma said, looking at my messages before taking over my phone, “Give me that!” he wrote something really fast and sent it, then took a picture and sent it. “Now we’re good”

My phone ringed a couple of times, Haruma read the messages and smiled pleased with himself.

Tanaka and his husband put a few plates and juice for us – his husband was drinking coffee.

“It’s good to see a new face, this never happens” his husband said politely. “What brought you here?”

“Momo” I said.

Tanaka jumped in his seat and his husband grinned.

“I told you that girl means troubles, nothing stops her ever, I knew it since she tried to mess with my nephew”

“We’ve had a long list of security guards,” Haruma told me.

“And why haven’t you fire her?” I asked Tanaka.

“Look, she’s harmless, she dances well, and she…”

“She’s an orphan” his husband interrupted, “and this guy over here has a terrible savior’s complex. Momo’s an orphan, Haruma was neglected and I suppose you…”

I nodded; he was kinda right. Tanaka exhaled:

“I’m gonna talk to her again, just give her time”

“Time for what?” Haruma asked him, “If she keeps trying to follow him she’s gonna do something stupid, you know her”

“Well, if I fire her she will come back as a client”

“Why she doesn’t cause you any trouble?” I asked Haruma.

“Oh, she likes tough guys and I’m a cinnamon roll”

Beanie laughed, squeezed Haruma’s cheek and said:

“It’s not just that, she likes to break her favorite toys”

“Here we go again” Tanaka rolled his eyes.

“I hate to say ‘I told you so’, but you know I’m right” He finished his breakfast, “Listen, she doesn’t just wants to hook around, she likes breaking hearts, she likes to make guys obsessed with her and dump them like trash”

Haruma put his arm around my shoulders and pointed at my face.

“The thing with this guy is that he’s already obsessed with someone”

“Oh, a challenge, she hasn’t have to deal with someone in love before” Tanaka’s husband analyzed me, looking somewhat pleased.

“You should go to work, honey,” Tanaka said.

“Sure, I’m leaving, but I wanna know something first” he said and looked at me, “what’s your girlfriend like?”

Haruma smiled and asked too:

“Yeah, what is she like, Dabi?”

It hit me again; I recognized it this time, I immediately bursted out a ton of cheesy compliments about her image — like her captivating sparkly eyes, contagious laugh— and personality —how kind she is and tough at the same time. I felt exhausted when I was done and had to take a deep breath.

Beanie and Haruma seemed extremely satisfied. Tanaka looked at me worried. For myself, I think I fainted after that.

Suddenly, I was at my birth house.

I heard mom humming in the kitchen, Fuyumi was helping her to make dinner, I could smell it; Natsu crossed the front door and greeted me.

“When did you get here?” Natsu patted my back when he walked by.

“Touya, help us set the table” Fuyumi told me from the kitchen’s door. Mom smiled at me, behind her:

“Touya! Welcome home!”

I tried to reach them, I really tried, but the room stretched as Natsu, Fuyumi and mom stared at me from afar.

“Did you go to Sekoto Peak again, Touya?”

That man, my father, was by my side wearing a frown and the house disappeared and turned to the forest.

The forest was on fire, my blue fire, and my babe was standing there. I called her name but nothing came out of my mouth so I screamed – still nothing - and the flames embraced her but she didn’t move.

A bucket of cold water hit me and woke me up; Tanaka and Haruma were standing in front of me.

“What the fuck were you dreaming?!” Tanaka asked.

“Dude, your face!” Haruma looked at me terrified.

I touched my face, it was hot, and I used my phone’s camera to see the damage: a mark of burnt skin appeared around my collarbone. It wasn’t that bad.

“You seem to be used to burning yourself, it doesn’t hurt?”

“I am used to this, a friend fixed my face a couple of months ago” I sighed when I realized Hana was gonna kick me.

“A couple of months, then your girlfriend has seen you like this,” Tanaka mumbled.

“So we don’t have to worry about her getting back at us” Hamura sighed in relief, Tanaka looked at him in disapproval.

“Watch your words”

“It’s fine” I said, “Thank you… for everything”

“Thank you for not burning yourself to death”

“Tanaka, don’t say that!”

“I’ve done worse. I need to go home” I said.

Tanaka invited me to eat first and brought a burn cream for me; after that Haruma and I left, we were walking side by said when he started talking:

“Hey, about your thing with Momo…”

“I don’t have a thing…”

“My bad! It was a poor choice of words, but I wanted to let you know, she’s not like that. That thing Tanaka’s lovey dovey said before... Momo likes to make guys fall for her, but she’s scared of commitment.”

“So what?”

“I thought you could trick Momo into thinking you’d dump your girlfriend for her, you don’t have to go all the way with her. Just pretend she caught your eye, take her to the movies…”

“No”

“Well, it’s respectable. See you later!”

In the subway, I thought about inviting an iced coffee to my babe, so I took my phone to send a message and read all the stupid messages Haruma sent her.

“Hi hi, this is Haruma, a friend from work your fluffy-haired boyfriend made, he’s with me and our boss right now, we’re having a little reunion but don’t worry, we’ll return him later, safe and sound - pinky promise” Sent. Right after my last text.

“If he’s not friendly, why friendly shaped?” Sent, with a blurred picture.

“Hello, Haruma, thank you for taking care of him.” Read.

“Have fun” Read.

“Sorry, we broke him.” Sent with a picture of me sleeping on the couch.

“LOL, send me another please” Read.

[PIC][PIC][PIC][+7 PICs] Sent.

“TYSM♡” Read.

It’s like they’re speaking another language, I thought.

Then I remembered what I dreamed and tried to take it off my mind, but I couldn’t. I was just entering our neighborhood when she called me, except she wasn’t the person on the other side of the line.

A police officer introduced himself and explained a fucked up situation:

She was at the police station. There was an illegal use of her quirk. She caused a public disturbance. She had a verbal fight with a hero.

Each sentence the officer said was more ridiculous than the previous one, then he mentioned a car accident and I lost it.

At that moment, I wish I could teleport like her, but the only thing I could do was take a taxi. When I arrived, she was sitting in front of an officer’s desk, he was yelling something at her and she was quiet, just taking it.

“If she was in an accident why are you yelling at her?!” I yelled at the officer, she looked at me and jumped up, there were no visible injuries or scratches; the officer stood up too and a couple more hurried as if we were gonna fight.

“Is this your husband?” he yelled at her again, as if I wasn’t there.

“You bet I am!” I walked furious towards them.

“What the fuck did you tell him?” she asked him upset.

“What happened?” I wanted to hear it from her, but the officer didn’t let her talk.

“She caused a public disturbance when she verbally fought with a hero that was about to save a kid…”

“I already told you that is not what happened!” she exclaimed, absolutely mad, “that dickhead hero caused the car accident right after I saved the kid, check the goddamn CCTVs!”

“What hero?” I asked.

“Nobody important” she said calmly and turned back to the officer, “there were eyewitnesses and you, the goddamn police! Just took the hero’s word for granted! Fucking inefficient!”

He wrote something while shaking his head, I felt the urge to burn everything down but I looked at her, she was mad but she looked fine.

“Should I take you to the hospital?” I asked her but she refused.

“You can’t go anywhere until you pay the bail,” said the officer and pissed me off, I wanted to burn him to ashes.

“You should’ve start there” she reproached him with fire in her eyes, pulling her wallet out of her purse.

“And you still owe an apology to Beast Arms”

“He’s the one who should be apologizing!” she complained, “that fucking beast almost killed somebody”

She was distressed; it was all over her face. When we walked out of the police station, I hugged her and she cuddled, her scent filled my nose and I patted her back.

“I fucking hate heroes” she complained, “this was all his fault”

“Today was a long day for the both of us” I whispered. She touched my collarbone.

“I noticed,” she whispered back.

“What happened?” I still wanted to hear it from her.

“I was walking home and I saw a kid running, he crossed the street at a red light and I just teleported to get him and teleported back to the sidewalk with him. Out of nowhere, that dumbass hero jumped at the same time we appeared back in the sidewalk, and he didn’t just stopped the car, he crashed it! Can you believe it?! And it wasn’t just that car, the one behind it and another crashed too! It was madness! And the idiot looked around and saw me with the kid crying and addressed me as if I did something wrong, he jumped in too hard he could’ve smashed the poor kid!”

“Why was the kid crying?”

“He was trying to catch his puppy, that’s the worst part! I didn’t see the puppy, I just took the kid back to the sidewalk and the hero was yelling at me and I saw the poor thing lying dead in the middle of the street, so I yelled back at that stupid piece of shit! He’s supposed to be trained, he’s supposed to see the whole situation before jumping in to action, he could’ve save the puppy, but noooo!”

She kept ranting and moving her hands in the air and I was so enchanted by how much she depreciated that hero that I wished it was Endeavor the one that stood in her way. I would’ve killed to see the old man being reprehended by her in front of a crowd.

She was so into it that she didn’t notice I was taking her to the hospital to make sure she and the baby were fine. That night I saw for the first time an echography, the doctor said everything was normal but I felt like an idiot because I saw nothing on the screen.

They both laughed at me.

“It’s always hard for new parents, especially the dads” the doctor said, she was really nice, “I’m gonna show you something cool”

Suddenly Hana came in.

“Hi there! Whatchu doin?” She saluted playful as usual, but her eyes looked tired.

“Hana, shh” the doctor shushed her and my babe waved her hand.

A sound filled the room, it started as a numb beat and then it cleared… my babe closed her eyes and the doctor smiled. Hana covered her mouth with one hand and put the other on my arm while jumping in excitement.

“That’s your baby’s heartbeats,” she whispered but she probably wanted to scream.

I felt something warm in my chest, something I wasn’t able to put in words but it compared to the day I made blue flames, it filled me with joy somehow. I wished it would last forever.

[gleefullypolin]

I am still highly distracted by the spoilers and suffering for it but hearing that both Obi Wan is done after ep4 and that the carriage scene is also in ep4, I think a lot of the over the top yelling about Kenebling I saw was a touch dramatic.

(not that I am also not dramatic, I am and will continue to be so)

I haven't read or thought much on Penelope possibly having a dream but if she does...good for us, ha. I know the metadata said a dream in ep2 but in my head (and the way I'd write a fic) it would be near the end of the ep to bookend the brothel scene at the front to contrast both how he acts with her and his feelings for her over the episode. Cue wake up scene and fade to black for a mini cliffhanger before going into the 3rd ep where that garden scene is supposed to be for real. What a ride it's going to be.

Knowing we get some serious yearning, jealousy, horny jail vibes and they pretty much have to be eps 2-4 before the carriage scene that's so much to work in through 3 episodes, Obi Wan feels so much more like a plot device than anything else at this point.

Oh they are so angry about the promo. Every time I open twitter I see a new and offensive bad take on why we're getting promo but they didn't (in 2022, with the pandemic restrictions still going strong no less). It's nasty behavior and says a lot more about them than it does about s3. Truly one season per couple is perfect. No pressure to break them up for drama, no storylines fading and feeling hugely OOC or painful for almost a whole season just to act like the huge conflict never happened because they're moving onto the next one. I will happily let the next couple take the spotlight and all the better if I manage to get invested in them along the way.

20 years? That's so impressive! Adulting and too much of it, I agree, but impressive nonetheless.

I am so distracted and still searching down holes I probably would never go down to find more spoilers LOL! But I need all of them. I did see that we only get Obi Wan in 1, 3 and 4. And I would be good with that. I saw the Carriage spoiler and girl I died. I saw it ends on a cliffhanger and I will say I do have a rule about no cliffhangers because they give me the GREATEST anxiety there is. So as soon as episode ends I will be back down my spoiler hole for episode 5.

I think if you look up the word dramatic in the dictionary (something they definitely had when I was younger) it would have my name listed there. I read something that brothel scene number 1 happens in episode 2 and that brother scene number 2 didn’t come until episode FOUR! FOUR!!! I said. Yes I got dramatic again. I might have dropped to my knees in true Darth Vader style and yelled NOOOOOOO! But then I said Stacy…and Yes I talk to myself a lot…I said Stacy shut the front door, it will be ok. And then I was fine. Because then I remembered that no one knows really anything past episode one and we are all making stuff up in our heads and getting paranoid now.

I think its going to be fun and games and yearning and pining with a pinch of annoying there is this other suitor who likes veggies hanging out in the back for a couple of episodes and then all of a sudden episode 4 there is going to be some serious shit going down. And whatever happens in that one is going to be the ballgame. Because I noticed we only got like 3 screenshots from that episode. Like two of her in her dress dancing with Lord Kenobi at the ball and her serious face as he’s talking to her. And then Colin all angry and serious on the stairs…so what the hell goes down in 4 because damn. That’s where it all goes sideways and they end up literally sideways in a carriage!

I saw more beautiful promo today of Nic and Newts in Australia and it made me just flutter and flurry and not care that everyone was angry about it because it was so sweet and pure that you have to be mad and crazy to be angry about it. The things I have read that they keep saying about them is just trash and not nice. I’m happy it’s one season because if you focus on a couple for too long, writers have a tendency to screw it up by adding in dumb things to keep the story interesting like new love interests or fake drama that no one asked for. I’ve watched too many Ryan Murphy shows to trust writers. I want to see them happy and sexed up next season and running off to find a room. Maybe Colin can throw in a couple lines of “My wife” to make me giggle too.

I was ok with 20 years until my co workers told me it was like 41,600 hours of my life…though I’m pretty sure a lot of those hours were sneaking off to read fanfiction too.

[raygothops]

The end of an era, or so it feels. I'm not sure what's happened or what's happening, what changed, why I feel the way I do, but something is different in my head. I don't feel like things are clicking the way they normally do. Nothing has grossly changed, but some little things are different. I feel like football doesn't hit the same way internally as before, like it's more distant. It feels like medicine has taken some of that real estate. It's interesting because love is basically boundless for me, and I thought my anchoring energy worked similarly where I could develop new anchors while maintaining the same significance.

That's the thing though, significances feel like they changed. Now, people are super significant. I'm wondering if people have maybe replaced or displaced football. Maybe my anchors are zero-sum. Is that good or bad? Who knows. I almost flipped the switch playing today and then I just didn't. Maybe subconsciously knowing the situation, I saved it. I don't know. It was weird though. I had the emotions but I processed them and they went away more than they stayed. Maybe I have better emotional processing... Or less emotions, at least related to football.

Because I still haven't released my other emotions from earlier in February. Basically I'm somewhere over 100% of my emotional capacity with an artificially inflated emotional threshold because I still need to cry, just haven't done it yet. That need to cry has been more come and go than expected, but we'll see how this next week goes.

I would like to say weekend but I'm not sure what type of weekend it will be, though I know there's one type it won't be. It won't be a culmination of friendship, it'll be a bitter reminder of how to pay more attention to communication.

I had the greatest presence of anyone I've ever met, and all signs and indications say I blew it. I said too much and that was that. Did I deserve it? I don't know what I deserve. Is it on-brand for my life? Yes, though I think this is the first time I've blown it given my breakup was mutual.

I told her I didn't deserve her, and I guess I was right. I wanted to be a great friend, I just wanted to be a positive. I had a very simple job, and I didn't do it. I guess not doing my job today is a nice summary of not doing my job in this situation. I started well and finished horribly. And now I don't know. I don't know what the emotions are towards me in either situation, but I know I failed. The pain of failing Sam hasn't really hit yet, I don't know when it will, maybe once I know she's gone. The sadness hit me already, but that's all muddied by the feelings of failure.

I feel like I've failed so much recently, and it's crazy because my school progress makes it appear that everything is moving forward well but the truth is, I haven't been doing things well. It's similar to the feelings at the end of 2023, except I had gotten so many gaps addressed to start the year that it felt like I could ride high into my new phase of life. Instead, I'm just walking, walking with the weight of my failure. At least I've been able to hold my head up this week. But I stopped riding high 2 weeks ago. I got checked and I was humbled. I don't really know if I can even apologize properly for what happened, or if it even matters. I guess it's just another part of my heart permanently reserved for someone who may never update that reservation again. Unfortunately, this is the first time but it would be great if it was the last, because losing people on my heart is painful. It's not a quick pain, it's a slow burn that is really hard to put out because you give them so much time as a cushion. I guess one day, she could write back, but I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't. It's her right and I'm just a guy she met less than 7 weeks ago.

That was a lot and I could do more self-criticism but I think the point is clear. The thing that could be replacing/displacing football is about to change my life. 2 weeks of waiting isn't anxiety-inducing to me, but it does feel like a waste of 2 weeks. At least SOAP could be next week but I digress. The next time I'm taking care of kids, I'll be their actual doctor I guess. The idea of doctor, or any position for me, has never been daunting really. I know what I'm there to do and I'll do it to the best of my ability. I got to schedule for a non-Sabbath graduation both for Dad and for me. I just like clean Sabbaths tbh. Will not walking with people suck? A bit. Is it worth the awkwardness? Not really to me. I know my brain and Dad won't be there on a Saturday afternoon. People will show up though, I assume. I do have to be careful with assuming though, that can get you into trouble.

With Sam at least, it wasn't anything like assumptions really. It was just faith in her. Faith that she would just accept my heart offered raw. It was too much though.

Back to graduation. Idk how I'm inviting people but I just hope that special people can be there. Part of me wonders how big that list will get, cause my heart only grows with that list it seems. I just want to get on to the next part of life though. I've been here just kinda passing time and I want to change lives now.

Romantically, idk man. I can be liked hypothetically. Will some girl actually like me? Feels like a hard sell. Idk, I feel like with relationships, people tell more dreams than reality. Maybe there's someone but it feels more like kind words than something to really believe.

My eyes are tired so I'm stop, but who knows? There could be part 2

[kishdoodles]

When things couldn't get worse for Subz and Vitalasy, they just had to get unwillingly teleported into another world, far from the Lifesteal SMP. Now tasked to save that world, they embark on a journey to get back to their normal life again. One where Subz isn't a girl, and neither of them ever have to admit any romantic feelings they have of each other.

aka my completely normal Fabiniku AU for Purple duo ^_^ yippee!

[chrisevansgoodgirl]

hii i don’t mean to rush you but do you have any updates on your work?:) i reallyyy miss it, but of course i’ll keep satisfying myself with your already posted stories, because they’re soo good😭

No, don't feel bad for asking! I'm so bad about updating sometimes 🤣 and I'm quiet so you guys are prob just like uhhhh bitch you done, or are you working? I totally get it!

sooo, let's dive in.

my heart is really set on these bff daddy fics. i want them posted on christmas. I can't promise that it will happen, but those are the stars i'm aiming for! I keep telling myself that not everything needs to be 10,000 words!

second! a Ransom update! It's about to be a year, right? I think that was when I posted one of the longest fics in the entire world. like 25k or something??? wild. (I'm exaggerating i promise, but damn. who's really gonna simp for ransom in 25k words?? only me)

third! I want to get back to my roots! I want a carol x steve x reader story! It's not going to be crazy or long, but just a nice lil update, right? that'd be fun!

four, a little unsure about this one but i'd love to get my fucking ballerina chapter posted. shit, I've had pieces of that typed for months. i actually intended to post it last Christmas, so...yikes lol. hopefully this will be the year.

and five. my freezy fic. it's a lil cute one (cute as in reader is cute, but it's gaining words fast lol. almost 4 k now and i haven't even edited, which i always add more on editing bc I'm backwards) idk why it exists, i just know i sat down and started writing soooo, here we are.

and a special note, not directed at you, but more so just an update for everyone. is killing peggy carter 2 coming? definitely. any time soon? from the looks of it, no. you guys really loved this story and I'm so happy about that bc it was just a fic that i sat down and wrote all at once. it was like one of my pureset fics that was just so emotion based and crazy and i loved getting to write it for you guys and having all those passionate interactions. so, very simply. the last thing I want to do with part two is let you guys down. so I'm constantly working on it. I've written parts and scrapped them, i go to the bathroom at work and type out furious notes about directions i want to explore, but I'm still waiting for that golden moment where something significant pops into my mind and the fic feels complete. so it's coming and it's always (pleasantly) on my mind, but i would never give you guys less than 100% for that fic bc you guys deserve a good part for being so kind and so lovely to me. i had been convinced that no one was going to want it, that it was going to just get buried in all my other fics and i had though i would be okay with that. but this was such a beautiful experience and i value every part of killing peggy carter and i look forward to the future with that fic and all of you 😘

[mxbottleflip]

The Boyz - Son Eric [Smut] :^)

sorry i'm too uncreative for captions

heya ! after procrastinating for the last few hours i'm finally able to post my very first smut, yay ! enjoy, my loves ♡

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pairing: {brattamer/dom!eric (tbz) x fem!brat!reader}

summary: {eric is busy studying and you think of a way to get his attention-turning into smut obv.}

word count: {~1,3-1,4k}

warnings: {none really, issa smut lol}

requested: {yes, by anon ! dw i gotchu :D}

________________________________________

~tysm for the request !~

(also eric is still going to school in this au sksks felt like giving him homework to focus on fit pretty nice)

NOT PROOF READ BECAUSE I'M TOO LAZY MYSELF AND HAVE NO FRIENDS TO DO THAT FOR ME (:

ACTUAL START DOWN HERE

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the way eric licked his lips while working on his homework got you weak in the knees. he looked so incredibly hot whenever he was concentrating on something, you could watch him for years. "y/n could you please stop staring at me like that ? it kinda makes me nervous..", eric finally spoke up and turned around in his seat to look at you. you were sitting right next to him and probably haven't looked away a single time since he started studying.

your eyes were scanning his face, all of his features.. his damn good looking face almost made you angry. "what the fuck are you so handsome for ??", you yelled and let out a fake cry. eric just laughed at it and turned back to the bunch of papers infront of him: "yeah i mean if i had nothing good about me, i wouldn't have such a gorgeous girlfriend like you eh ?"

his words also put a smile on your face, but honestly you weren't in the mood for sweet talk right now. you've been extremely horny since you guys woke up in the morning and eric rather gave all his attention to his stupid homework than to his "gorgeous girlfriend".

"how long will that stuff take ? i've been waiting for hours and i need you right nowww", you whine. "mhm patience my girl, rushing me wont help you", he responds.

a sigh left your mouth and you let your hand fall on his thigh, resting it there for some time. he obviously didn't mind, so you started carressing it, giving it some squeezes in between. "y/n please, if the fact that you are staring at me all the time didn't make me nervous enough, this is, for sure.. i'll be finished very soon and will be all yours then, alright ?", he scratched his head and gently pushed your hand away from his thigh. flashing him the biggest smile and nodding at the same time, you stood up and walked over to his closet. you'd be getting what you wanted, one way or another.

you opened erics closet, looking for one of his shirts to throw on. after you found what you were looking for, you unclasped your bra and pulled your shirt over your head. tossing them both on the floor, you turned around to see if eric was looking - no chance. you groaned, took off your pants and threw them onto your other clothes. while quickly slipping his shirt over, you still kept an eye on him. honestly how could anyone look THAT hot while studying ??

you were now left with only his big ass tshirt and your panties on, making your way back to him. instead of sitting back onto your own seat, you let yourself down on erics lap. he let out a sigh once again: "you comfortable now, ma'am ?" you hummed in response and started to move around a little, trying to get even more 'comfortable'.

"if you insist on sitting in my lap, could you at least stay still ? listen, you're not the only person in this household who'd prefer to do something else right now, but i really have to get this done and having you move around on my dick is not helpi- is that my shirt you're wearing ??"

this time you didn't respond in any way, you just kept moving around and squeezing his thighs. eric tried to push you off of his lap, but you stayed stubborn: "is there a problem with it ? also,, your little friend's telling me you love having me in your lap.."

"no, there's not but.. please get up, i can't work like that ! and never call my dick 'little friend' again !", he complained. after he tried to push you away multiple times, you actually got up and were now standing next to him, looking like you don't belong anywhere.

"you know i'd love to spend my time with you right now, but i really have to focus on studying at the moment.. also, why the hell are you not wearing pants anymore ??", he groaned after seeing your bare legs poke out below his shirt, ".. you're really something else, you know that, right ? just let me finish my work now." you had to hold back a laugh at how annoyed he seemed, but compared to you, eric didn't think there was anything to laugh about. he rolled his eyes, concentrating on his studies again.

at this point you were becoming a little frustrated too, not understanding how he could still resist you and STILL prefer working on school rather than working on you (ehehe). all of the sudden an idea came to your mind, that one has to work for sure !you grabbed the pen he was currently writing with and threw it on the floor;

"oh noo, seems like you dropped something.. let me help you !"

you bend down in front of him, revealing half your ass and picking up the pen, when you're being pulled back onto his lap again. "enough of that, stop playing around already. you just wont let me study, will you ? fucking brat, you think you can keep acting up like that all day and expect me to stay calm ?"

out of shock you dropped the pen you just picked up again and immediatly felt your heat throbbing at his reaction.

did that really just work ??

now he was the one to squeeze your thighs, but he didn't go easy on you. he grabbed a handful of your flesh and roughly kneaded it until you felt a burning pain spreading in that area, the pain causing you to moan. "bet you just wanted me to snap at some point, right ? test how far you could push me until i go crazy ?" you hummed, slightly embarrassed at the fact, that seeing your boyfriend being annoyed of you turned you on that much.

after you admitted to that, his hands were quick to find their way to your core, rubbing your clothed clit. you let your head fall back onto his chest, "knew it.. ", he whispered. eric also murmured something else you didn't quiet understand, but you were just trying to enjoy the moment really. "all that teasing just for the tiniest bit of pleasure..", he then added, ".. you couldn't even be patient about it.. unbelievable."

after a good minute of him straight up teasing you, you started whining. "please, s-stop teasing me..", you stuttered.

"huh, what did you say ? weren't you the one to start all the teasing ?", he cheekily asked, and you just groaned in response. "come on, speak up baby, tell me what you want." "please.. just touch me eric god damn, i've been waiting for this the entire day, i really need you, please.."

that earned you a little chuckle from eric: "hmm i don't think you derseve to be touched at all, thinking of the way you acted up all day..", regardless of what he just said, he got rid of your panties and started properly rubbing your clit. his free hand went up to your throat, giving it a good squeeze, "you've been such a brat, not listening to me and teasing me all day.. shouldn't i be punishing you rather than pleasuring you now ?"

you shook your head 'no': "you just looked so good concentrating on your stuff and all and- oh fuck..", you were interrupted by him letting a finger sink into you, curling it upwards and squeezing your throat tighter. finally getting what you wanted just felt way too good..

"god, feels like you're soaking and i haven't even started yet..", eric panted and started moving his finger inside of you, soon adding another one. "feels.. so nice.. please keep going.." your breathing became even heavier as the hand that was resting around your throat now went down to your boobs, teasing your nipples and twisting them gently. by that time you could feel an obvious bulge poking at your butt, so you tried lifting your hips a bit and returning the favor. "don't even think about that, you're not getting to touch me", eric demands, increasing the speed of his fingers pumping in and out of you, "drop your attitude first."

"i-i don't know what you mean..", you panted and closed your eyes, to solely focus on his actions. "oh, so now you don't know what i'm talking about anymore ?", he mocked and pumped his fingers as far into you as he could, earning a surprised moan from you, ".. you don't remember dropping that pen on purpose just to show your fucking ass off to me ? was that someone else then ?" him bringing that up made you clench around his fingers and you couldn't hold back any of your moans anymore. you automatically pressed your butt against his bulge, hoping to get any kind of response to that.

even though he managed to hold back how horny he actually was pretty well, you could clearly hear him cursing under his breath now. "and also.. shit.. what are you gonna do about it, huh ? about me disrespecting you and.. n-not listeni-.." eric shoved his free fingers into your mouth, stopping you from talking. "shut your mouth already, am i not doing enough for you yet? needy little brat, once i've made you cum i'll throw you on the bed and fuck some sense into you, but you'd probably even like that, wouldn't you ?"

________________________________________

if you read until here,, wow, tysm ! i hope you somewhat enjoyed it lol

i'm actually thinking about writing a part 2, if anyone would even be interested in that.. anywaysss

feel free to request whatever you like !

feedback is always welcome ~

stay healthy & stan the boyz ♡

honestly what a visual god wow

[mtngirlforever]

Tyler Kennedy

Alright guys so here is my 1st Tarlos one shot. I haven't written anything in 2 years so I felt really rusty, but I couldn't quit writing. Please leave me your thoughts! I'll get it up on Ao3 in just a bit! 😘 I haven't posted in so long I no longer know how to do the keep reading line so someone wanna shoot a girl a line and help her out?? Until then sorry guys!

TK was a little pissy when his dad put Judd in charge of the call. Sure the dude was from Texas and was probably the most qualified for this, but he rubbed TK the wrong way most of the time. However, he was going to suck it up with some attitude until Marjan went down. No way was he losing a team member when he could reach her. He heard Judd's screams of no, but he didn't care. And really if he went down would it really matter? 

The rush he felt when he unclipped and reached for Marjan was the high he'd been missing. The adrenaline rush was powerful and left him feeling high like only the pills could. The corn was like quicksand, and by the time he had a good grip on Marjan, he was going down too. He sucked in a deep breath as he felt himself get separated from Marjan. The pressure around his chest was unbearable, but it was the first thing he'd really truly felt since the night Alex ruined his life. 

When he stumbled out into the light and took his first deep breath, it hurt but he was more worried about finding Marjan. It could've ended much worse, but they were all in one piece when they returned to the station. What he wasn't expecting was for Judd to blindside him when they got out of the rig. His chest was hurting and he was pretty sure it was just bruises, but he wasn't backing down from this confrontation. 

He didn't appreciate Judd's tone or the fact that he was insinuating TK only had a job because his dad was captain. Shoving Judd was his first instinct to let his anger out, and thankfully Judd was willing to fight back. It wasn't helping his ribs any, but at that moment he didn't care. 

After Paul separated them, he decided it was finally time to see Michelle. His chest was hurting with each really deep breath he took and he was sure it was just from the dive down the corn. He knocked on her office door glad to see his dad wasn't across the way. When he heard her call come in he opened and closed the door quietly. 

"TK what can I do for you?" Michelle asked giving him her full attention. 

"Just… uh.. needed to see if you got a second?" 

"Of course what's up?" 

TK made sure his dad hadn't come up before turning back to Michelle. "I think maybe the pressure in the silo was too much after all. It hurts with really deep breaths but I don't think anything's broke. And I… I don't wanna tell dad, and I can't…. I won't go to the hospital because I can't take anything they'd give me so can ya… can you just make sure its bruises?" 

"Yea come on. We can go to my bunk side. No one will know. And whatever you tell me will be in confidence." 

TK gave her a nod of thanks before following her out. Michelle gave him a quick once over and confirmed what he knew that it was just some bruising. She told him to take Tylenol if it was too painful since he appeared not to want anything stronger. He gave her a thanks before going out. Luckily shift was almost over and the rest of his shift was quite. 

That night despite still being angry at Judd, TK decided to stay in and rest. Across town, Carlos and Michelle were meeting up for beers at Carlos’s house. While he would love to help her find her sister, he was starting to lose hope. It had been three years, and no serious leads. He did think he’d gotten his point across by giving her the list of blue pickup trucks, and pointing out that Dustin did not own a blue truck. 

What he wasn’t fully prepared for was to spill his guts about TK. While he had missed their two-way street friendship, he’d initially been teasing. Until she turned serious and really wanted to know about his latest hookup. And truthfully, he didn’t know what to say because he really didn’t know anything about the guy. 

“I met someone, we hooked up, and then it got weird,” he said with a shrug. 

“Doesn’t it always,” she laughed. 

“No Michelle, it doesn’t always get weird,” he said exasperated. 

“So? Tell me about this boy," she relented. 

“You know him actually,” he said with a dramatic pause as she looked at him to continue. “TK Strand,” he said as she gasped at him. 

“Nice!” 

“Yea. He’s a ten and now I kinda can’t get him out of my head.” 

“So why don’t you ask him out?” 

“Oh no! He’d probably ghost me. I just hate being the one doing the chasing.” 

“Why? You’re the one with the handcuffs,” she joked as he rolled his eyes at her. “But speaking of, TK had an interesting day.” 

“Oh yea? How?” Carlos asked suddenly intrigued.

“You hear about the silo call?” At his nod Michelle continued; “Well, he decided to ignore Judd’s warnings and unclipped his line thinking he could save Marjan. They had to cut the side of the silo because he and Marjan got sucked down. So they went for a tumble. The pressure was too much for him and bruised his ribs. He came to me in confidence so I shouldn’t even be telling you, but just thought you’d wanna know, “ she winked. She could tell it was more than a hookup for Carlos and she had an idea TK needed someone in his corner so she didn't mind spilling what she knew.

Carlos let it roll over in his mind. TK ignored a direct order, and could’ve died had they not got the side cut soon enough. That did not sound promising after his freak out over a dinner. He let his thoughts tumble over each other as Michelle finished her beer and headed out for the night. Carlos ended up crashing on his couch, just managing to get enough sleep before his shift the next day. 

He was pulling a twelve hour shift starting at noon, and by the time it was getting late and getting close to him being off, he saw the one person he was not ready to see being lead into the station. Despite knowing he should distance himself, he couldn’t help it. He had to see what TK had done to be brought in in cuffs. 

He managed to get the officer that brought him in to leave him at Carlos’s desk, while Carlos went to find out what happened. When the other two wouldn’t talk and TK’s breathalyzer test was a 0.0, he decided he would be the one to cut him loose. He wanted to know why the guy he couldn’t get out of his head was suddenly on a suicide mission two days in a row. He saw TK hunched over his desk holding an ice pack to his eye. Had his hands been free, Carlos would bet his arm would be wrapped around his ribs. He knew they had to be killing him from the information Michelle had disclosed. 

The look on TK’s face when he sat down was honestly priceless. “Seriously?” he said with as much attitude as possible.

Carlos acted like it didn’t bother him; “Austin’s a small town TK; or should I say Tyler Kennedy.” TK grunted in response without looking up. “Bummer about getting arrested, people might find out your real name. Which marks the first actual thing I’ve learned about you.” 

Finally the ice pack drops, but the attitude doesn’t. “Isn’t you processing me like a conflict of interest or something?” 

“The good news is, neither of your new friends want to talk about that little scuffle tonight, and since you blew a 0.0, we’re not even giving you a drunk and disorderly. You’re free to go,” he says all this as he unlocks the cuffs. 

“What’s the bad news?” TK asks hesitantly. The no reaction and no questions from Carlos was making him nervous. 

“The bad news is that means you did this with a clear head.” TK won’t meet his eyes so he decides to push on. “I’m not trying to be your boyfriend or even your friend if you’re not into it,” he says while trying to catch TK’s eyes. He wants to make sure his point is getting across because he wants TK to know someone does care about him. “But you should talk to someone about why you felt compelled to do something so suicidal,” he pauses as TK finally meets his eyes; “two days in a row.” 

They have a brief stare down before TK reaches for the bag with his things. Carlos backs off, knowing he probably pushed too far, but he wants TK to know he’s not alone. When TK is still sitting there, he drops the box of tissues in front of him and goes back to the not bothered attitude. He’s not sure he wants TK to see how much he affects him. “Got a little crud by the way,” he says while pointing at his lip. 

He dropped the cuffs on his desk trying not to think about what Michelle had said. He tries to appear busy, but he can’t help but watch TK out of the corner of his eye. He's nowhere close to getting the dried blood off his lip. “Other side,” he said giving himself away and getting a look and a huff from TK. 

TK moves to the middle and sort of the other side, but he’s still not getting it. “Stop,” Carlos says exasperated. “Just let me.” He grabs a tissue and reaches over when TK moves back just a touch before his head stills. Carlos holds in his sigh and waits. When TK is still he reaches over and wipes the blood. It’s intimate and he shouldn’t get used to it because he knows TK will eventually bolt, but he can’t help but wish they could have more intimate moments. He can’t take his eyes off TK and thankfully TK is looking back. 

He’s almost positive his face is an open book of hurt and curiosity and desire, but he can’t seem to mask it. The things TK does to him is unbelievable. He gets a quiet “Thanks,” as he appears to go back to paperwork. He tries to stay focused and not move when TK leans in closer so just Carlos can hear him. And what comes next is definitely not what Carlos was expecting. 

“I’m sorry I went crazy on you the other night,” he says, and he sounds so sincere and upset about it. Carlos doesn’t want to let him know just how much it’d stung when he walked out the door so he decided to play it cool. 

“I’m a cop; I’m used to crazy.” He keeps working, but deep inside he’s absorbing everything and his stupid heart is doing flips. 

He sees TK try to find the words to go on when Carlos won’t look at him. He’s really trying here, trying like he hasn’t in a while. He’s not sure why he is, but that spark he had with Carlos was the most he’d felt until he dived down the silo and got in the fight. He didn’t want to give that up even if he’d acted like an ass the other night.

“Look I just went through a really bad breakup, like nuclear bad. And then I relapsed,” he says all the while never taking his eyes off Carlos. He wants Carlos to know he’s being as open as possible at the moment, and why he is the way he is. 

“You mean with me?” Carlos says again without even looking at TK.

“No,” TK says dropping his eyes at the same time Carlos cuts his eyes to look at him. TK finally has his attention, and he’s not sure how to handle it. He’s ashamed and embarrassed, and he really doesn’t want the hot cop he was hooking up with to know how bad he really is. He knows he’s a fuck up and his dad knows it, but he’s still not gotten comfortable with everyone else knowing just how much of a fuck up he really is. And that’s another reason Judd’s words hit close to home. At this point it really is because of his dad that he’s still a firefighter and still working, still here even. 

His eyes stay on the ground as he admits the truth. He’s come this far, he might as well lay it out there and let Carlos run free. No way he’s going to want anything to do with him after he knows most of the truth. “I mean with substances,” he says carefully. He can’t admit more than that at the moment, but he knows if Carlos was ever to stick around, he’d admit the full truth. But he knows that’s never a possibility. He’s debating running when Carlos finally speaks. 

“Right. Which explains your reaction to the champagne. I’m such an idiot. I’m-”

“No,” TK starts to interrupt, but Carlos continues, “I’m sorry,” he says as TK finishes his thought; “It’s fine okay?” He finally makes eye contact again before he continues not exactly sure where the word vomit is coming from. “I mean ever since I’ve gotten here it’s just…. It’s just gray, and I just feel numb all the time.” He pauses to decide how else to word it because he knows it’s going to sound bad, but he doesn’t have the words when he’s flayed open and raw. “I guess I just…. I wanted to feel something.” 

When Carlos just stares at him, he quickly grabs his things out of the bag and stands to make a run for it. He knew this was a bad idea opening himself up to someone else. No one could put up with his bratty attitude and fears and failures. As he turns the corner of the desk, Carlos speaks again, and it’s the last thing TK expected. 

“Judging by that lip, I’d say mission accomplished.” 

TK’s hand falls on the desk to prop himself up. His ribs are really killing him, his head is starting to pound, and he just laid most of his vulnerabilities out there and Carlos wants to bust his balls. He gives him his best go to hell look before speaking. “You really busting my balls right now?” he says in disbelief. 

“Yea suppose I am,” Carlos says with enough of a smirk that TK can’t stop his own smile from forming. TK goes to leave and Carlos lets him get a few steps down the hallway before he stops him. “I know you’re in pain, do you want to go to the hospital? My shift is over in another hour, but I could cut out early,” he says with a hand on TK’s arm. 

“Na. Don’t want what they’d give me anyways. Michelle told me to just take Tylenol.” While he’d love to give in to the offer and he knows it’d make him feel immensely better, he’s not going to disappoint his dad again. But it’s more than that now. He doesn’t want to let Carlos down, now that he knows the truth. 

“At least let me drive you home. You don’t have a car Tiger,” he says with a smirk. 

TK looks around before leaning into Carlos a little. “Yea… Yea that’d be fine. Long as you can leave.” He doesn’t want Carlos getting in trouble for him. 

“Yea. Just give me a few,” he says tossing TK’s jacket around his shoulders and leading him back to his desk. TK sits down wrapping an arm around his ribs as he hunched over a little. He couldn’t wait to get home and fall face first into bed. 

“Here,” Carlos said handing him two extra strength Tylenol and a bottle of water. “I’ll be ready in five. Just let me get my stuff.” TK offered him a nod and a smile before downing the pills. 

The ride through town was quiet. “Where to?” Carlos finally asked when he needed to turn one way or another. 

TK was biting his abused lip in thought. He didn’t want to go home and his dad see him this way, but he didn’t want to assume anything about going to Carlos’s. He’d caused him enough trouble tonight and laid way too much out there. A soft hand on his arm stopped the abuse his teeth were inflicting on his already abused lip. 

“You can come home with me if you want…. Tyler,” Carlos said quietly. His actual name rolling off those sexy lips sent a shiver down his spine. No one had called him that in a really long time.

“Don’t want to put you out or cause you more trouble,” TK said quietly. 

Carlos reached over and grabbed his chin, turning TK to look at him. “I meant it when I said I wouldn’t be anything you’re not comfortable with, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t gladly be whatever you wanted or needed.”

“Just to sleep. Got shift in the morning,” TK said after a small pause. He wasn't up to anything more tonight, not with the pain he was in.

“Just to sleep,” Carlos smiled before turning for home. 

Once home, Carlos went to shower, after laying out a pair of sweats and clean shirt for TK. TK settled in bed while Carlos was in the shower. He was suddenly so exhausted and he knew he needed as much sleep as possible before shift. He wasn’t sure how he’d explain away the black eye and split lip to his dad just yet, but he’d figure something out. Carlos’s bed was so comfortable that he was asleep before Carlos was out of the shower. 

The next morning when his alarm went off, TK let out a groan. “There’s a shirt on the dresser. Keep the sweats,” Carlos mumbled sleepily. 

“Thanks,” TK whispered before rolling over and giving Carlos a searing kiss. His ribs protested the held breath, but he couldn’t resist kissing the hottest guy that made him feel something other than numb and that had taken care of him when he needed it.

“Go out with me tonight?” Carlos mumbled sleepily. Stupid Michelle and her stupid advice he thought, when TK paused getting up. “Just darts at the bar,” Carlos said as an afterthought. “Nothing fancy.. Just whatever…” 

“Yea,” TK interrupted. “Yea. Sure. Shift’s over at eight. It’s a date.” 

“It’s a date Tyler Kennedy,” Carlos smiled before shutting his eyes again at TK’s groan. He had a feeling Carlos would not be letting the full name go anytime soon now that he knew it.

Shift drug by, and his anger with Judd returned tenfold when he saw him again. By the time he was off shift, he wasn’t sure he would be much fun, but he wasn’t bailing. He downed two more Tylenol before heading to the bar where Carlos was already waiting. After ordering his mineral water, he joined Carlos over at the dart board. 

It wasn’t but a few minutes and Judd and Grace joined the crowd at the bar, and TK’s mood soured. He started ranting about Judd and where he got off on his high horse for a solid twenty minutes. His aim is off because he’s letting his anger fuel his throws. Carlos throws as he keeps ranting, and TK turns to get the darts. 

“You know if I was a less secure man, I might be bothered by the fact that I worked up the nerve to ask you out, and you’ve spent the entire night talking about another guy,” Carlos teases. And it’s clear in his voice he’s giving TK a hard time. 

“Well it pisses me off,” TK says as if it’s not obvious. 

“I noticed,” Carlos smirks thinking of all the ways they could work his anger out of him. TK hands the darts back to him, and Carlos can’t help but call him out on his brattiness. “Guess he hit a nerve,” he says before throwing again. 

“What is that supposed to mean?” TK asks as if he doesn't know. 

“Nothing,” Carlos says before going one step further. “Just seems like nobody’s ever spoken to you that way before.”

“You think he’s right?” TK asks disbelieving.

Carlos finishes throwing the darts before answering him, letting TK work it out for himself. “Do you?” he asks TK when TK pulls the darts out of the board. 

TK lets out a deep breath deciding on what to say. Instead of continuing the argument, he decides to go with something he hopes is threatening enough to get Carlos to drop it. “You know I’m holding a dart.” 

“And I’m packing a piece,” Carlos says with a straight face and without missing a beat. 

TK thinks of something smart to say back, but the only thing coming to mind is how hot Carlos looks in that moment. “That’s hot,” he finally spits out.  Needless to say that was the last round of darts and they were leaving. TK’s ribs were still sore enough that anything more than cuddling and making out in bed was out of the question. But for once, TK was ok with it. Carlos cared; he was still there even though he knew TK was a fuck up; he didn’t put up with his shit, and he let him just be. Since moving to Austin, he finally felt like he was truly going to be ok and wouldn’t be numb forever. 

“Sleep Tyler Kennedy,” he heard whispered in his hair as he drifted off feeling safe and truly cared for. 

[retvenkos]

(This is @swanimagines with my personal account, sending on anon so there wouldn't be any misunderstandings and my regular account doesn't have this cool new askbox and it's a must since I'm a babbler, hi Olive!) Congrats again for 2.5k! Hopefully my first ask made it, your ask page started bugging after I sent it 😅 So I'd like to ask for a 🔥 ship please with uhh The Maze Runner because we finished the movies yesterday with my friend (first time for her, third for me) and she liked them + TMR has popped into my life in so many ways lately (like we talked about TMR's funny scenes with my friend while watching TV and all of a sudden The Scorch Trials began rolling on TV while we were laughing about a scene and we didn't know it was about to start 😅) and I've seen dreams about it so it just feels like something wants me to follow it 😂 + Ships are always interesting to me!

Sexuality: I'm not sure, but um, I mainly crush on men, but sometimes on women too. It's not common though. I've never dated anyone irl and I suspect I'm fictosexual (having attraction only/mainly on fictional characters) or something 😅 But yeah, I think I prefer men but women are cool with me too 😊

Personality: My MBTI is INFP-T (Turbulent Mediator), and I'm a Hufflepuff. Very awkward if I want to get to know someone (as you probably noticed). I don't like big groups and I think that at big parties you'd find me a) frozen against the wall or b) in a room where there's people who are my friends. I'm super protective of my friends and I consider them as my family. I sometimes even cut ties with people if they're mean to my friends, even if they haven't done anything to me personally. I'm not good in controlling my own emotions though if I'm angry and just blurt random things out, not even thinking and I need help from others to word myself better in those situations. But moving on from me being angry, my friends say I'm loyal and kind, and a good listener. I'm super shy with strangers but once you get to know me and if I like you, I'm loud and make a lot of bawdy jokes.

Hobbies: I have been writing stories since I was like 8 years old, I'm learning to read more books, learning to play piano, I like to play video + board games, taking long walks to the forest (when it's spring/summer/autumn) + fangirling and clowning around. When I'm old, I aspire to be a crazy guinea pig lady, I have 3 right now.

Some things I dislike: spiders, heights (I don't have a phobia, I just don't like them), anything horror (still have traumas from watching 5 seasons of SPN...) and traveling by a bus. I couldn't think of anything else that isn't, like, obvious. (Being shouted at, snobby people etc)

Bonus: 3 random facts about me:

1. I can imitate the sound of a guinea pig + a loon.

2. I have a big-ish stuffed toy dalmatian dog named Dami, he's as old as me (25yo) and I still can't sleep without it 😅 If I have to wash it, it will be a sleepless night since it takes like 24h to dry up...

3. I'm good at imagining I'm in a music video while listening to music on a walk, it makes me walk faster and even dance a little.

Thank you so much, you rock!! ❤️

hey, jenni! i did get your first ask, my askbox probably bugged because i got such an influx of requests, but i did receive it! also, the new askboxes are so cool, one day i’m going to figure out how they work and then it’s going to be all over for you guys.

and don’t worry about being awkward, the line starts behind me, heh. from what i can tell, you’re super cool and talented!

TMR:

I ship you with Newt!

now this is the highest honor i can bestow upon anyone, keep that in mind

first of all, newt would 100% sit with you on the back wall during parties - he doesn’t quite enjoy the crazy energy of parties, either, he’d much rather just have quiet conversations with you and thomas.

also, despite being really socially adept, newt manages to keep a lot of secrets - especially those secrets that make him more vulnerable - so he wouldn’t mind your shy nature - the two of you would exist in each other’s orbit for a long time before finally reaching out, and talking about the really deep things.

i 100% believe that the two of you would go on walks together, talking about whatever comes to mind and standing close enough that your hands brush and both of you kind of jump at the contact, smiling anyway. and if you ever grab his hand, he just ascends.

newt also creates deep emotional ties to people, so he totally understands your loyalty and is glad that someone cares so much about others. he’s definitely vocal in his support of his friends, so he would appreciate your support in that area.

i also just think that your general temperaments match up nicely, so the two of you would almost always get along, and you’d support the other in whatever decisions they make. newt would love how you open up once you get to know him - it would cheer him up immensely and i think that both of you would benefit from it.

also, newt is probably scared of heights, too, for obvious reasons, and that idea just makes me cry a little bit, ngl. point is, both of you would avoid heights together.

newt would love all of your chill hobbies - he definitely has hobbies that match up with yours (like board games, video games, and books). i imagine the two of you hang out a lot and just do really chill activities in the living room, swapping stories and jokes. 

and what’s great about newt is that he would never push you out of your comfort zone. if you don’t want to watch that, you don’t have to. if you don’t want to go there or do that, you won’t. newt is really good at knowing boundaries and he can have lots of fun inside of them. it doesn’t bother him in the least.

also, newt would love your passion for the things you love - listening to you talk about your interests or your goals in something he adores, especially if you mention him in your idealized future.

newt is so sentimental and such a softie, i can definitely see the two of you being the perfect couple.

take part in my 2.5k celebration

[meditating-dog-lover]

Health and Fitness Update (05/09/2021)

So I had a much better week this time.

I finished my classes and my exam, so now I never have to go back to school ever again.

This took a giant load of stress off my back, it genuinely did. My life is headed in a positive direction. I am so happy and relieved, I feel like I can smile and breathe again. I feel less miserable.

I feel like I can dedicate more time to my personal health now. This includes better sleep, better scheduling, physical care, self-care, etc... I have many improvements to make, I'm definitely looking forward. I might even consider going to a spa. There should be a good one in the new area I'm moving too. Less screen time is another big one. I feel like this past year aged me a lot, I need to take it easy and slow down.

I still have my thesis left, but to be honest I am almost done. All I need to do is write my Powerpoint, get that and my thesis reviewed, submit those and present. I've presented slides a handful of times before so it shouldn't be a big deal. Since I'm way less stressed now, this won't be much of a bother for me. And after that, I get to leave my lab and take a breather. I worked so hard on this and I am so exhausted.

I am moving to a house in a month. I am definitely looking forward. It's in a very nice area. I haven't lived in a comfortable house since 2009 so I'm happy to be able to live in one now! The driving in that area isn't as crazy as it is here, so I'll be doing a lot of that once I move. I'll have way more time to do that since I have much less work to do.

I also get to see my grandma in a few months, and I really can't wait. I miss her so much and I haven't seen her since 2 Decembers ago because of COVID. I've also been spending a lot of time with my dad and I am so happy about that.

I feel like I can go back to my old self-care routine and go back to enjoying the cute fun stuff I used to enjoy like reading, writing, history, arts, music, old movies, etc... I definitely lost interest in these things. I know losing interest in the stuff you love is a sign of depression. However I cannot make that conclusion about myself since I was never diagnosed by a medical professional. But I certainly know that I was feeling super miserable. Thankfully I am starting to feel better.

I am getting my second vaccine shot on the 19th. 2 weeks from then I can wear my mask less often which is great.

I have my dentist appointment in a few days. To be honest, I got the hang of taking better care of my teeth. Eat less refined sugar, eat more fat soluble vitamins, eat more minerals, drink water in between meals, take a supplement, brush, use mouthwash, floss, and sleep well. I just need to find a good long-term toothpaste and learn to breathe from my nose while sleeping. Going to the dentist every six months helps too.

I am slimming down more and more each day. I found a super healthy approach to health and fitness since January. I eat foods I really enjoy and foods that taste great. I learned to cook and bake, which itself is a form of art. I just make sure to eat balanced and to take it easy on sugar and fat. In terms of exercise, I found that a balanced routine works - cardio (both LISS and HIIT) and strength training (bodyweight and weight lifting) does the trick. I am going to start exercising 3x a week rather than 4 because 4 is a lot. Plus I'll do 1x bodyweight, 1x HIIT , 1x weight lifting, and several times per week walking (whenever I can really). I'm going to keep this up, but I definitely found a balanced, solid and longterm plan I can stick to. I am so happy. Months from now I'll be at my target.

Another goal I have is to slim down my calves since they are muscular. The only way you can slim down muscle is to stop using that muscle group. I'm going to stick to workouts that don't overwork my calves and I will avoid those that overwork them. I'll definitely create a list post on here of exercises I feel cause bulkiness. I think my calves bulked from doing a lot of strenuous walking. But slowly and surely I'll figure it out. I like Rachael Attard's program because her goal is to slim down legs. I'll definitely draw some tips and pointers from her.

So overall, I'm headed towards a positive direction. And I am so happy about that. I've been feeling so miserable since November/December but I am getting better now. There are other areas in my life I need to improve, but these are the main ones.

I hope the rest of my spring and my summer work out in my favor, I know they will. I also want to look into clothes and makeup too.

~HEALTH IS WEALTH~

[angelixii]

1-140 (anything you haven't answered already) - Felix

Oh, hello! Thanks for the ask!! 💕

3 fears - Spiders (I get frightened when I think about them) heights (slightly) and the public (anything like murder, kidnapped, ya know stupid people)

 3 Things I love - Music, Idols, and animals

 2 Turns on - ig Hats (like snapbacks) and glasses

 2 Turns off - oof I don’t really know.. ig self absorbed or a fudge boy

 My best friend - C: @straykids-sk (wuv you)

 How tall am I - 5′2

 What do I miss right now - My cat that passed away :c (her name was P.J)

 Favourite color - Blue, red, and sometimes green

 Do I have a crush - no not really

 Favourite place - my home

 What am I listening to right now - theres a website called asoftmurmur.com and it has noises like rain or waves and stuff like that

 Shoe size - pretty sure 10 in US womens

 Eye color - brown

 Hair color - light-ish brown

 Meaning behind my URL - I chose Felix cause hes my bias wrecker and hes angelic C:

 Favourite song - Theres like a million but 5SOS’s She Looks So Perfect wil always be a favorite (idk why)

 Favourite band - Ill just chose Stray Kids cause I don’t wanna write them all out

 How I feel right now - kinda tired but ig ok

 Someone I love - Ill say my best fren Georgia (@straykids-sk) cause i wuv her

 My current relationship status - single and i kinda wanna stay that way for a while

  My relationship with my parents - We all live in the same house and its just us (I have one other sister but she moved out. But shes here a lot tho) and we all get along well

 Favorite season - probably Spring c:

 Tattoos and piercing I have - none and I don’t really want any

 Tattoos and piercing I want - ^^^

The reasons I joined Tumblr - Georgia wanted me to and I thought it would be fun (I was right c:)

 Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? - no :/

 Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? - oh heel no she my best fren I would never

 How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? - when I have school like 20 minutes at max

 Have you shaved your legs in the past three days? - I did today

 Where am I right now? - at my house on my laptop c:

 Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? - reasonable level cause I’ve always had ear problems and they are sensitive (even tho I always have my earbuds in)

 Do I live with my Mom and Dad? - yup

 Am I excited for anything? - not that I can think of no

 Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? - nope :/

 How often do I wear a fake smile? - not THAT often

 If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? - oooof I don’t think I could answer that question

 What do I think about most? - probably k-pop

 Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? - Definitely behind

 What was the last lie I told? - It was kinda a joke but “i’ll do it because im the good child”

 Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? - Eh depends on who it is but facetiming/video chatting

 Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? - ghosts kinda and aliens, I mean sure we’ve barely discovered space, who knows whats out there

 Do I believe in magic? - sometimes yeah

 Do I believe in luck? - I mean yeah

 What’s the weather like right now?- theres nothing really going on

 What was the last book I’ve read? - uhhhhhh fully on my own (not in class)? The Maze Runner Scorch Trials

 Do I have any nicknames? - Kassadoodle, Kassidilla, Kassy

 Do I spend money or save it? - I’m trying to save as much as I can rn in my little money jar c:

 Can I touch my nose with a tounge? - nah

 Favourite animal? - Lions and Fennec Foxes

 What was I doing last night at 12 AM? - uhhh im pretty sure saying goodbye to Georgia on video chat

 What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? - oo um I cant really think of one rn :/

 What is my favorite word? - yeet

 My top 5 blogs on tumblr (not in any order)

@honeylixs

@zoxsu

@tinyfigureskater

@stray-kids-dork

@straykidsmate

 If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? - I probably wouldn’t say anything cause im shy and afraid people would judge me on what I say c:

 Do I have any relatives in jail? -not that I know of

What is my current desktop picture? - a pic of Bts

Had sex? Bought condoms? Gotten pregnant? Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? Had job? Smoked weed? Smoked cigarettes? Drank alcohol?

no to ALL those questions C:

Am I a vegetarian/vegan? - nope don’t think I could ever

Been overweight? - …

Been underweight? - no.

Gotten my heart broken? - nah

Been to prom? - nope

Been in airplane? - nope and I never want to really

Learned another language? - I take required (cause im one of the more intelligent kids in school. I know shocker right?) Spanish classes in school but im on summer break so I dont remember any c:

Wore make up?- nope

Dyed my hair? - nope

Had a surgery? - plenty of ear surgery and had my tonsils removed

Met someone famous? - nope

Stalked someone on a social network? - nope

Been fishing? - no but my dad has always wanted to take me and it sounds kinda fun

Been rejected by a crush? - nope never really had one and if I did I would never have the guts

What do I want for birthday? - ooo idk but i have to wait till next year anyway cause its already passed

Do I like my handwriting? - sometimes when my hand cooperates

Where do I want to live when older? - with my girl Georgia

Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? - nope ima good child (yeah ok suuureee)

What I’m really bad at - running :/

What my greatest achievments are - managing to keep straight A’s and I dont even study cause im online so

The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me - “u bird cage” - Georgia c;

What I’d do if I won in a lottery - ooooooooof idk

What do I like about myself - uhhhhh heh ig my hair or eyes/eyelashes

My closest Tumblr friend - Georgia (yes I do know her irl but shes honestly the closet tumblr friend I have so)

Any question you’d like? - hmm idk

Are you outgoing or shy? - definitely shy, unless with people im close to then quite crazy

What kind of people are you attracted to? - funny, cute and nice people

Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? - hA no

Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? - kinda

Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? - oof idk

What does the most recent text that you sent say? “ohhhh no XDD” (sent to Georgia)

What are your 5 favorite songs right now? - (I already answered this question and don’t wanna answer again)

Do you like it when people play with your hair? - yes I love when freinds at school did (once we were watching a movie in Spanish and my friend next to me was playing with my hair and I almost fell asleep heh)

Do you think there is life on other planets? - totally

Do you like bubble baths? - I haven’t had one in forever

Do you like your neighbors? - only one cause I think im related to them somehow or they are to like my uncle

Where would you like to travel? - out of this hell hole country c:

Favorite part of your daily routine? - checking my tumblr and stanning talent

What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? - stomach

What do you do when you wake up? - check my notifications on my phone

Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? - I wish it was more tan than it is (im quite pale)

Do you ever want to get married? - yeah

If your hair long enough for a pony tail? - yes but I hate pony tails so I never do it (I used to all the time as a kid)

Would you rather live without TV or music? - I rarely watch t.v anymore and listen to music almost all day so

Have you ever liked someone and never told them? - I mean yeah

What are your favorite stores to shop in? - I dont really have one for clothes but I do like Walmart

Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? - I mean sometimes

Do you smile at strangers? - If the smile at me first yeah

Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? - not that I can remember no

Ever wished you were someone else? - no (as much as I hate myself no)

Favorite makeup brand? - son;t wear any so I dont got one

Last thing you ate? - a Reese cup

Ever won a competition? For what? - not a big one I can remeber no

Ever been in love? - c:

Facebook or Twitter? - dont have a fb and i barely use twitter anymore but twitter

Twitter or Tumblr? - DEFINITELy tumblr

Are you watching tv right now? - i mean its always on for bg noise and light so ig so

What color are your towels? - all kinds of colors

Favorite ice cream flavor? - either Strawberry with out the strawberries or cookie dough

First person you talked to today? - my mom

Last person you talked to today? - Georgia

Name a person you hate? - C: theres too many

Name a person you love? - once again, theres too many

Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? - C: theres too many

Do you tan a lot? - I barely go outside so thats a no

Have any pets? - too many

Do you type fast? - I mean kinda yeah

Do you regret anything from your past? - everything XD

Ever broken someone’s heart? - I highly doubt it

Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? - C:

Is cheating ever okay? - hell no

Do you believe in true love? - I mean sure

What your zodiac sign? - Pisces

Do you believe in ghosts? - why is this question on here twice?

Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? (via catscuddlingandyou) - “…but not at all overwhelming, the balance of the different fragrances was subtle and flawless.” Twilight - Breaking Dawn (Do NOt ask me why thats the closest book its not mine and ive never read it and i NEVER plan on it)

oof that took like two hours heh.. its now currently 2:18am. and im very tired

but thanks for the ask anyway love! Im sorry for the wait! I was busy today. But im probably going to go to bed now

[discreetmusic]

OK as sort of a follow up to the last thing I reblogged, there are ways of getting help if you're struggling money wise!! My experiences are UK based so maybe doesn't exactly apply to everyone but-

1) You can apply for universal credit even if you have a job. If you have fairly low or unstable income you'll get an amount proportional to how much you earn each month.

2) If you receive universal credit you can get a LOT of extra help that isn't advertised- you don't have to pay for prescription medication, can get a free eye test and discount glasses. I've asked about these and didn't even have to show any evidence they just believed me and gave me the discount and free meds.

3) You can apply for a council tax reduction. Now instead of my flat having to pay £174 a month we only pay £17, which has saved us

4) Water companies and gas providers also offer discounts, especially in the winter. I haven't done this yet so don't know the details but I've registered to hear more about the schemes they have in place to make sure we don't go cold.

5) If your lettings agency are fucking you over, tell them. Site your tenancy agreement, tell your landlord they're not doing their job, contact companies who help tenants. Put in an official complaint and don't stop calling them till the problem is fixed.

6) Also ask for compensation. We were left with no shower for almost a month and I asked to speak to the highest possible person to give us money for our trouble. They never would have if I hadn't asked but I wrote a LONG letter with everything they did wrong and demanded money. They offered £300. I said not good enough we want £750 and showed how I got to that number. In the end we got £500 which is a LOT better than nothing.

8) Get a railcard. No really get a railcard. I have the 16-25 one and I think there's a 26-30 one now as well. It gives you a third off all train journeys and costs about £30 a year or £70 for three years. Mine paid itself off on the first journey I booked.

7) You can ask at underground stations to connect your railcard to your oyster, which gives you a third off all journeys, so I never pay more than £1.50 for a trip within London . This isnt advertised at all but it saves a crazy amount of money.

8) A lot of chain coffee shops do filter coffee for super cheap. Pret does it for 99p and you can get another 50p off if you bring your own cup. So if you just want somewhere to go sit and be and don't care about fancy coffee, you can read/write/stay out of the cold for 45p.

9) If you work in a certain area you can sometimes get a local discount, just be nice to the people working in shops and caffs, introduce yourself as someone working nearby and you can get some money off your lunch or whatever. I've gotten this working in a mall, a high street, and just like.. the general southbank area so it applies to lots of places.

Basically- research and ASK and there is usually a way you can get discounts and help on stuff. It's not as scary or difficult as it seems, people won't judge you, and those systems are there to be used. You're gonna be ok.