#i’ve been planning to get tickets for a while and today was uniquely horrible

[natbplease]

also i’m officially seeing the crane wives in may. im normal about this information

[shananigans402]

1-65 will do, please. Thanks fuck face :)

I knew exactly who this was and I was so tempted to not reply, but your punishment is having to read through all my answers and remember them forever or you fail the friend test. To everyone else, please do not click unless you want to be very bored, my answers are not interesting lol

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you? Nope

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you? Assuming 5 is the most, 1. Maybe 2. 

3. The person you would never want to meet? The person who sent me this (jk I’m excited for our eventual meet up where we hit up a strip club first thing 🙏)

4. What is your favorite word? I answered with ‘conniption’ the other day and still have not found a word I like more.

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? Already answered this, fruit tree! I also like palm trees, maple trees, and willow trees. I know that’s not the question, I’m just saying random shit now.

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought? It took me a long while to remember where I was this morning. I honestly don’t remember, I was rushing to get ready for an early morning meeting.

7. What shirt are you wearing? My Orlando Strong shirt 

8. What do you label yourself as? Lesbian

9. Bright room or dark room? Bright room

10. What were you doing at midnight last night? Sleeping? Possibly checking on a feverish little beeb who was going through it with her second dose of the vaccine.

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far? No idea. I like various ages for different reasons, but this age so far is not bad. 

12. Who told you they loved you last? Probably my sister 🤷‍♀️

13. Your worst enemy? The person who sent this ask.

14. What is your current desktop picture? The apple pic of Catalina island that changes based on time of day (yes it’s the default, don’t judge me)

15. Do you like someone? Lol yeah I hope so 😂

16. The last song you listened to? Pretty Girl by Hayley Kiyoko 

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? Definitely @raginage

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? I feel like I can only attack Raginage so many times. Can I pick a fictional character? This week I was real mad at Dave in The Darkness. BaBe!​

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do? Lol no one, you’re talking to a person who feels very uncomfortable with anyone doing anything nice for them.

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional) Not this again. Last time I said eyes? Still no pics, sorry

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do? What would I look like? Do I get to design myself like a sim? I honestly don’t know what I’d do because I doubt the world needs another clueless white man walking around, so maybe just stay at home. 

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it? Nope. And my last answer to this was awful. I do think I have a fantastic ability to annoy my friends but in a way that’s just amusing/endearing enough to make them still want to talk to me 😌

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of? Unique? Uhm well my two big fears are confined spaces and deep water so a submarine is like my worst nightmare.

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal. Oh this is going to sound so odd. To be clear, I’ve had better sandwiches, but my go-to is provolone, turkey, roast beef, and spicy brown mustard or whole grain mustard. Please don’t judge me.

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it? Travel budget for future trips to visit my buds and get into trouble and eat food. I know $100 won’t go far, but it’s something.

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go? Well, after my last answer I want to visit my friends! But there are too many people to visit and I only have one ticket. So change of plans. I’m going on a solo trip to Greece. Or Argentina. Or Iceland. Or Bali. Damn, I’m indecisive. 

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? Rabble red blend. Just a solid red wine. Also because @viola-lloyds stole my answer the other day (Juneshine; to be fair I asked her this question but whatever) and I don’t want to copy her.

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? Oh I answered this one, something about respecting others. Yeah, a nice rule like that. Want to establish some healthy communication on this island.

29. What is your favorite expletive? It’s still fuck

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno? But what about my PLANTS. Can they count as loved ones? Probably my laptop, I know that’s lame but like...I have a lot of stuff on here. Or the collection of cards I have that my granddad drew little drawings in, I want to get them all framed.

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? To be honest, I don’t know if I’d change big life events in case it altered the trajectory of where I ended up. So idk maybe the ending of Bly, let’s give those lesbians have a happy ending!

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! Italy! But wait, let’s get back to this sleeping with celebrities and super-powers bit...

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? Oh that’s a really tough question. I always wanted to meet my great-grandma Olga because she seemed like a really awesome lady. 

34. What was your last dream about? I can’t remember, this is bothering me because I wish I could! I’m sorry. My gf recently had a dream where I kissed a dude right in front of her. It made us both very uncomfy lol

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]? I hate this question because I can only think of one thing.

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? For surgery, yeah

37. Have you ever built a snowman? But of course!

38. What is the color of your socks? Not wearing any? I was wearing blue ones earlier. Jfc my answers are so boring.

39. What type of music do you like? Lots! I tend to listen to indie, classic rock, and some pop

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? Sunsets!

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? Chocolate or a variant (chocolate peanut butter, chocolate caramel)

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer) LA Rams or Seattle Seahawks. I know they’re in the same division. It’s tough. (Please don’t ask me why these teams)

43. Do you have any scars? Yep, mostly from burning myself on ovens. I simply get too excited for my food.

44. What do you want to be when you graduate? I...have graduated? 

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Well bestie recently said I have “lesbian hands” and I think that’s code for man hands so maybe that hahaha

46. Are you reliable? I try to be!

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? How many more times will I watch The Darkness before I learn my lesson? (Related: When does other bestie finally admit to her fetish?)

48. Do you hold grudges? Not typically, no

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? A dog and an otter? Can we domesticate otters? No, a horse and a large bird, create a pegasus and then free travel.

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? Oh god. I don’t even know where to start today tbh. Damie and pokemon and cosycon and looming and feet and [redacted] and developing apps for VP. So many fantastic conversations. 

In real life, probably the time I was at a laundromat in Italy and this guy wandered in with a beer, sat next to me and my male roommate, assumed we were a couple, and proceeded to give us bizarre life advice. I wish I could remember more of it, but it was so odd.

51. Are you a good liar? Hmm I’m okay at it I think, that is, I can convince people I’m serious when I’m actually joking. But I don’t like actually lying if it’s not just teasing someone. 

52. How long could you go without talking? Probably a few days if I had to.

53. What has been you worst haircut/style? The haircut I got before studying abroad! It was too short and I was so sad.

54. Have you ever baked your own cake? For a birthday? No. For fun? Absolutely.

55. Can you do any accents other than your own? Not well, no

56. What do you like on your toast? Butter and/or honey and/or jam

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of? My beautiful depiction of a scene of chapter one of Private Dancer. 

58. What would be you dream car? An electric car of some sort. I don’t know enough about cars tbh

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. Nope but sometimes I’ll play music and dance and maybe softly sing.

60. Do you believe in aliens? Yep! Definitely 

61. Do you often read your horoscope? Almost never unless someone sends it to me.

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet? Already answered, A

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons? Dinosaurs! 🦕

64. What do you think about babies? What do I think about them? They’re pretty cool. Just tiny little humans. 

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of. I was very nice and let you correct your mistake and submit one after the fact:

In your opinion what is the best thing you can cook, like your speciality? My favorite thing to make is pasta, I started making my own sauce and I’d love to make pasta from scratch sometime.

[blast0rama]

Mondo Purchased From Alamo Drafthouse by Funko

Well, this is a hell of a thing to dig into first thing Monday morning.

Enough that I had to dust off the blog.

Let’s get into the key snippets…

Variety:

Funko is popping cult-fave pop-culture brand Mondo into its merch mix.

Under a deal with indie theater chain Alamo Drafthouse, Funko acquired Mondo, which creates and sells vinyl records and soundtracks, posters, toys, apparel, books, games and other collectibles. About 30 Mondo employees are joining Funko.

Financial terms of the deal are not being disclosed, but it’s obviously not massive. Funko says it does not expect the Mondo acquisition to have a material impact on its financial performance in 2022.

Alamo Drafthouse:

Driven by passion, Mondo’s core team of creatives transformed that small ticket booth into something none of us could have ever imagined. Nineteen years into the journey, I look back at the amazing body of work that Mondo has created in posters, soundtracks, and collectibles and am truly in awe. I couldn’t be more proud of the amazing team that has over and over again set a staggeringly high bar for imagination, quality, and beauty.

That said, the past two years have been brutal and harrowing at Alamo and Mondo. We filed bankruptcy and thankfully emerged from COVID in fighting shape, ready to continue our mission of being the best damn cinema that has ever or will ever exist. While we were closed, however, Mondo was our saving grace, the only facet of our business that kept the lights on.

Now, with the dark days behind us and each weekend bringing box office successes, Alamo is seizing opportunities to grow our cinema footprint with seven new locations across the country that have been announced recently and more to come. As the company resources are focused on this growth, we realized that perhaps a bold and exciting new chapter is about to begin for Mondo.

Over the past few months, we searched exhaustively to find a perfect partner who saw what was unique and special about Mondo and was in a position to meaningfully invest in Mondo, nurture the team, and further its reach and vision. Funko is exactly that unicorn.

The team that made Mondo amazing is staying together, making the transition to Funko, and will continue their same work with the same creative vision. I am super excited about the future plans I know about, and I’m sure I will soon marvel at the work that is not yet even a lightbulb spark.

Mondo:

For 20 years, we have poured our heart and souls into this weird little thing that Rob Jones and Tim League started in a closet in the corner of an Alamo Drafthouse lobby… then out of a closet underneath the seats of a Drafthouse auditorium (seriously). Eventually, we opened our own gallery space, and even started our own convention.

We have always loved following our passions and doing things our own way, and we’ll be forever thankful to the Alamo Drafthouse for supporting those passions and helping us grow into what we are today. But we needed a bigger boat… and that’s where Funko comes in. They understand what Mondo is today and are eager to help us become the company we want to be.

From the outside, Mondo might seem like it is changing… but on the inside much is staying the same. We remain the same team, and our goals remain unchanged. We are still the same bunch of weirdos who share an undying obsession with popular (and maybe less popular) culture, and a craving to make cool stuff with the best artists in the world.

Lord knows I’ve spent enough of the past 14 years on this site worshiping the creations of the team at Mondo, so I had to dig in.

At its core, this isn’t a horrible pairing. Mondo lives and dies by their ability to get licenses, Funko has all the licenses.

The bigger concern is one of quality control. Funko is a very mass produced product. Mondo is not. Mondo is an artisan celebration of pop culture, with each artist selected and chosen specifically as a pairing.

Will this be able to remain the status quo with this purchase? My cynical side says no, but I’m very willing (if not wanting) to be wrong.

Let’s see how this plays out.

[eldritchsurveys]

o96.

Have you ever had a bonfire on the beach? >> Nope. I’ve attended a bonfire in the forest, though, which was quite lovely.

Are you skilled when it comes to working in the kitchen? >> Not particularly. I can do the basics and that’s about it.

When was the last time you went to a campground? >> A few years ago, in Brooklyn.

Do you listen to music while driving? >> Sparrow is the driver and she plays her iPod. We’d switch up but the adapter is a Lightning cable and therefore doesn’t fit my phone. (In Wednesday’s car, the radio does what it wants -- except when Friday’s fucking with it, of course.)

Is there a movie you currently want to see? >> Sure, there are a lot of movies I want to see.

When was the last time you hung out with people younger than you? >> Well, Sparrow’s younger than me.

What is the closest blue object to you? >> A Black Panther blanket.

How much did you spend on your last shopping trip? >> I don’t remember.

Do you wish you had a better cellular plan? >> No, it’s fine for my purposes.

Are you good at buying gifts for people? >> I’d like to think so. I certainly don’t stress out about it as much as most people, which I think has its own benefits.

Would you consider yourself to be generous? >> At times.

Have you ever recieved an autograph from a celebrity? >> Yeah, a couple. But usually I got autographs from band members.

When was the last time you laughed so hard you cried? >> I don’t usually laugh hard enough to cry. Hard enough to lose my breath, yeah. Not so much cry.

Are you currently studying for your driver's lisence? >> No, but I did get to drive for the first time last weekend, and it was exhilarating. And not as difficult as I’d convinced myself it must be (so my first thoughts, before I started second-guessing, were right after all)! I’m still leery about getting on the road with actual other drivers, even in small-ass Wayland, but... I’ll get there eventually, I guess.

Have you ever gone over your cellphone plan by accident? >> Yeah, years ago.

Are you in a relationship with the last person you kissed? >> Sure.

Ever done something that at the time didn't bother you, but it did later? >> Yep.

Can you honestly say you've been drunk before? >> I can honestly say that.

Where did you get your last bruise from? >> I don’t remember the last time I was bruised. It takes a lot to bruise me.

Have you ever argued with a person of authority, and won? >> I don’t think so.

Is there a certain color of eyeshadow you prefer, if you wear eyeshadow? >> I like metallic shades.

Have you ever been addicted to mints? >> No, but I am somehow addicted to mint itself. I’m always huffing my lip balm because it has peppermint in it, lmao.

Are you a person that likes to take chances? >> Sure, sometimes.

Would you consider your life to be great right now? >> Sure, why not.

When a friend confides in you with their problems, do you listen? >> Sometimes. If that’s all they expect me to do, is listen, then yeah, it’s a lot easier. It’s when people want me to react a certain way that I have to determine whether I’m in the mood for that or not.

Do you have a piece of technology that should be dead, but it's still going? >> That reminds me of a netbook I used to have, Gilead, that I had to keep resurrecting because I couldn’t afford a new machine. It was definitely on borrowed time and performed horribly but I had no other option. When I finally got enough money to buy JARVIS, literally the day I brought JARVIS home Gilead gave up completely (probably with a sigh of relief, if computers could sigh). It’d done its best for me and finally it could rest. I don’t think I’ve ever appreciated a machine more in my life than I did Gilead, even when I was frustrated with it.

When it rains, does it put the damper on your mood? >> Sometimes. Also, heh, damper.

What was the latest you stayed up in the past week? >> Probably around 1a.

Have you had an awkward situation with someone recently? >> Not to my knowledge.

Do you always seem to be losing your bobbypins? >> I don’t have any in the first place.

When was the last time you found something overwhelming? >> It probably had something to do with sensory overload. Or video games.

Going anywhere next year for vacation? >> I’m not sure, what with Sparrow going back to school and the wedding towards the end of the year.

Ever sent drunk texts? >> I’ve sent texts while intoxicated, but I think even my intoxicated texts were at least coherent. One time I texted Sparrow while tripping and it might have taken me about a half-hour to type it but it came out perfectly clear in the end, so.

Do you remember the dream you had last night? >> No, I just remember the part that had Hallie in it (probably because that’s the last bit that happened before I woke up).

How many dresses do you own? >> About 5 or so.

Do any of your friends seem like a brother or sister to you? >> No. I don’t know what that would feel like, and what would make it different from friendship.

What bothers you more, cigarette smoke or cigar smoke? >> Cigar smoke, it’s more fragrant and harder to breathe through.

What do you think of Leonardo DiCaprio? >> I think he’s neat. The Oscar-related memes were really funny for a while, and then he won one and killed the meme. :p

Have you ever seen a movie that messed with your mind? >> Sure. I used to prefer movies like that. I still kind of do, but I also can’t watch them all the time like I used to.

Do you look good in hats? >> Not most of them. It’s the lack of hair.

Can you see a noticeable difference between DVD and Blueray? >> I can’t, but that’s a personal handicap.

Is there a song you're currently listening to on repeat? >> No.

Are you going to make a mega wish at 11:11 on 11/11/11? >> I don’t think I did.

Speaking of numbers, do you have a lucky one? >> Nah.

What do you think musical artists who use autotune? >> I don’t have an opinion. I prefer not to listen to Autotuned singers most of the time, but I don’t judge them or anything.

Have you ever held hands with someone for no reason? >> There’s always a reason.

Has anything surprised you today? >> I don’t recall.

When was the last time you played a video game? >> I played Pillars of Eternity 2 earlier today. I didn’t think the Beast of Winter DLC would be so tedious and full of annoyingly difficult enemies, but I’m suffering through it because Rymrgand is my goth-god fave.

Have you ever just watched flames from a fire & just thought about things? >> Sure.

Are there any musical albums coming out soon that you can't wait for? >> I don’t even know what albums are due out.

Have you talked to your significant other today? >> Yeah.

Have you ever sat down and eaten an entire cake by yourself? >> Nooooo.

Do you have perfect vision? >> I don’t know if it’s perfect or not, but I do know it’s pretty damn good.

Is there something you want to buy right now? >> Not at this moment. Unless it’s tickets to see Wardruna in Boulder and the matching transportation tickets. :T

Do you know anyone who can speak Gaelic? >> I don’t think I know anyone personally that speaks it fluently.

When it comes to eye color, do you have a preference? >> No.

What was the most unique pet you've owned? >> Vivek used to have a baby krogan. Its name was Snuggles. 

Is your hair currently dyed? >> No.

Has something annoyed you recently? >> Probably.

Do you like Doritos? >> Nope.

When you buy clothes, do you always try them on first? >> Not always. I often regret that, but.

Have you used bugspray recently? >> No.

Do you enjoy swimming in the ocean? >> I enjoy being near the ocean, but I can’t swim, so I usually just stay in the part where the tide flows in.

Have you ever bitten through your lip by accident? >> No.

Are you good at coming up with dares? >> No.

Do you know someone with the last name Brown? >> Probably.

Is there somewhere in the world you would never go? >> War zones, most likely.

Have you ever tried to sew or knit anything? >> Yes. Oftentimes I succeeded.

Has someone ever told you something that left you speechless? >> Probably.

Has something ever happened to you that seemed like it was from a movie? >> Well, yeah.

Do you find yourself to be a believer in love at first sight? >> Not particularly, but I won’t profess to know other people’s experiences.

Or perhaps, do you believe that there's that "someone" out there for you? >> I mean, there’s definitely people out there who mesh well with me. I’m in a relationship with one of those people, so there’s evidence.

Does money really matter to you? >> Of course it does. I like not starving to death in a cardboard box in an alley, after all.

Is there something you want to do, that you swear you will, no matter what? >> I don’t think I can make that sort of promise.

Do you know anyone who is a germaphobe? >> Yes.

Have you ever just laid out and watched the stars? >> No, but I probably should one day.

Is there a song that gets you pumped up no matter what? >> Skindred’s got a couple songs like that. Sound of Madness by Shinedown is another good one.

How about a song that soothes your anger or sadness? >> I Know It’s Gonna Happen Someday by David Bowie. I mean, it also makes me sad, but like... a different kind of sad. A sweeter sad.

Have you ever cheated at a card game? >> No.

Tell me what colors you're wearing right now? >> Grey and black.

Have you ever wandered around drunk with your friend? >> Yep. And high, and tripping balls.

Are you longing for the day that you'll be an adult? (If you're not already) >> I am already an adult.

Have you ever felt like your heart actually stopped? >> No.

Are you a fast runner? >> I don’t know, anymore. I used to be, I think.

What's something you've vowed to never eat? >> Hm.

What emotions do you associate with the color blue? >> Calm, gentleness, melancholy, contentment, heaviness, apathy. Depends on the shade.

Do you have a "poker face"? >> Yeah.

Are you good at holding back your laughter if needed? >> Nope.

Do any of your friends shamelessly burp or fart in public? >> I used to have a friend that did.

When was the last time you had a good cry? >> I don’t know. Most cries are mediocre at best.

Has anyone ever told you they wanted to marry you? >> Yes.

Is there a soundtrack to a movie that you absolutely love? >> There are several soundtracks like that.

Do you have a place where you keep your keepsakes? >> No.

Have you ever had a "thumb war" with someone? >> Yep.

What's your favorite style of jeans? (Skinny, boot cut, flare, etc) >> Skinny and bootcut.

Have you ever owned a diary/journal with a lock and key? >> Yeah, my first diary as a child was like that.

Do you have trouble sleeping if you sleep anywhere else but home? >> Yep.

Have you ever been so unfortunate to suffer from a hangover? >> Nope.

Do any of your friends have particularly annoying habits? >> I mean, probably, yeah. 

Is there someone you know who can never mind their own business? >> Yep, lmao.

If you need a job, will you take whatever you can get? >> ---

When you were little, what movie did you watch over and over? >> I wasn’t allowed to do that.

Do you rely on caffeine to keep you awake sometimes? >> Nope. Caffeine makes me hyper-aware of my heartbeat and paranoid and shit, so I avoid it.

When it comes to tests or exams, are you a crammer? >> ---

Time goes by faster as you get older, don't you find? >> No. Check back in 20 years.

Have you ever had a panic attack? >> Yes.

Do you own anything made of silk? >> Nope.

Is there anyone you know who looks like their dog? >> LOL no. But I’ve seen that phenomenon in photos.

Are you deathly allergic to anything? >> Nope.

Have you ever had a mouse in your house? >> Yeah.

Has anyone you trusted ever backstabbed you? >> I don’t know, maybe?

Do you recycle? >> Not regularly.

Do you know what you want for your dream house? >> ---

Have you ever seen the movie the Notebook? >> Nope.

Trying to put yourself in someone's shoes can be difficult at times, true? >> LMAO “at times”...

If you download torrents, what torrent program do you use? >> uTorrent.

If you go to school, will this year be different? >> ---

Do you own a trenchcoat? >> Yeah, technically, but I can’t wear it because it’s too small. >:|

The last person you kissed, have they ever done something special for you? >> Can Calah is always doing things for me.

Do you know anyone who DOESN'T have an ex? >> I don’t think so.

Are you able to count to ten in another language? >> Yes.

Is there something you know you have to do, but haven't done it yet? >> Not at this moment.

Is anyone you know really religious? >> Probably.

Can you sing? >> Yes.

Have you ever read "Gone With the Wind"? >> Nope.

If you look back at pictures of yourself from years ago, do you hate it? >> Hell no, I love older photos of myself. They’re adorable.

Have you ever used the photo editing site "Picnik"? >> Oh yeah, I remember Picnik.

Are your eyebrows naturally thick? >> Yep.

Is there someone that likes you and won't leave you alone? >> Not in an unwanted sense.

Has an animal ever taken a strong dislike to you? >> Probably.

When was the last time someone gave you a hand written letter? >> Rez did, with a package she sent me a few months ago.

Has someone ever told you how they felt about you in a letter? >> I don’t think so.

Have you ever told someone else how you felt about them in a letter? >> I don’t think so.

Do you find emails to not be as personal as letters? >> No.

Enough about letters, have you ever broken the law? >> Yes.

Have you ever attempted to cut your own hair? >> I cut my own hair every few weeks. I’m going to do it again tomorrow morning.

Has speaking in front of people ever made you sick? >> Nope.

Do you follow a lot of bands and musicians on myspace? >> I used to, back when it was active.

Have you ever wanted to tell someone how you felt, but never did? >> Yeah.

What was the last movie that made you teary-eyed? >> Oh, god, The Equalizer 2 ruined me.

Do you have a lucky or special coin? >> No.

Do you find you have a lot of notebooks that aren't close to being filled? >> No. I don’t buy notebooks anymore for that exact reason, no matter how pretty they are. I know better.

Do you love ice cream cake more than normal cake? >> No.

Do you sometimes write "lol" when in reality, you aren't laughing? >> Yep. At this point it’s reflexive more than anything else.

Have you had a piece of jewellry that turned your skin green? >> Yeah, so I don’t wear it anymore.

Do you check your email daily? >> I have a Chrome extension that alerts me to new emails, so yeah, I do end up seeing my emails daily.

Is there anyone you know who's in any way, paralyzed? >> Not anyone I know personally, unless it’s someone online who doesn’t talk about it ever.

Your significant other, are they shorter, taller or the same height as you? >> Sparrow is an inch taller than me. Can Calah is generally a little shorter than me, by his own preference.

Is there a certain type of music you love but don't tell many people about? >> Nope.

Do you know all the words to your national anthem? >> Yeah.

Have you ever breathed in helium? >> Yeah. Highly recommended.

Are you currently hungry? >> Nah.

Do you try to be confident and positive about your future? >> I don’t try to be anything about the future.

The truth all comes out when someone is drunk, true? >> Untrue. Maybe in some cases, yes, because alcohol tends to amplify what’s already going on with people... but I wouldn’t take what someone says in a drunken tirade super-seriously unless I had good reason to (based upon sober interactions and prior knowledge of the individual). 

Just a random question, but can you tap dance? >> Nope.

No one really bothers with the legal drinking age anymore, do they? >> ...What?

When was the last time you felt disappointed in yourself? >> I don’t remember.

How about feeling disappointed in someone else? >> I don’t remember.

For you, do you commonly feel more jealousy or envy? >> Envy.

Do you rely on the heads/tails flipping of a coin sometimes for decisions? >> Sometimes, yeah.

Do you have any specific chores you do around the house? >> I do the vacuuming most often.

Have you ever owned a garden? >> No.

Who was the last person to text you? >> Sparrow.

Does a blank sheet of paper sometimes prove to be inspiring? >> Not for me, it doesn’t.

For you, does comfort or fashion come first in dressing? >> It really is a combination of both. Luckily, most of the fashion I like is made to be comfortable, so.

Have you had two friends that absolutely hated each other? >> Yeah.

Do you ever find yourself trying to be the referee amongst your friends? >> Nope. I’m over that shit. Kill each other if you like.

Is there someone who always gives you inspiring advice? >> No.

Everyone has a role model. Who's yours? >> Apparently I am not “everyone”.

Do you ever "play drums" on tables or other hard surfaces? >> Yeah, sometimes.

Has a laptop ever burned your legs? >> Yep.

Do you know anyone who has a scar through their eyebrow? >> Yeah, actually, but I don’t remember who... weird.

Do you feel compelled to brush your hair hourly? >> Hell no.

Who was the last person to flip you off? >> Sparrow, because we do that to each other for the lulz.

Give me a list of the objects currently close to you? >> Okay, nah.

Are you doing anything the day after tomorrow? >> Yeah, hopefully going to the Grand Rapids Public Museum to see the Be the Astronaut exhibit, which I’d been hype as shit for.

Anyone's birthday coming up soon? >> Someone’s, I’m sure. Oh, Vlad’s is towards the end of the month, yeah.

Would you ever wear fake eyelashes? >> I’d try it but I bet they’d make me overstimulated.

Do you make the effort to smile at people? >> Sometimes, if I feel like it.

Are you good at following directions? >> If I feel like it.

Have you ever just screamed really loud in an attempt to feel better? >> No.

Are you in any way, still a child at heart? >> Sure.

Quality triumphs over quantity, correct? >> For the most part. There are always exceptions, I’m sure.

Have you ever danced when there was no music playing? >> Probably.

Do you have someone that you can just act a fool with and not care? >> Probably.

Have you ever listened to the uilleann pipes (Irish pipes)? >> I don’t think so, unless I have and didn’t know what they were.

Do you like Laffy Taffy? >> Sometimes. I don’t really eat candy much, though.

Is there any food within an arm's reach of you right now? >> Yeah.

From where you're sitting, can you touch a wall? >> I could if the back of this futon wasn’t in the way.

Would you ever stand at the bow of a ship & yell I'm the king of the world? >> Maybe, lol.

Do you know anyone who every second word they say seems to be a curse? >> Eh, not really.

Have you recieved a text today that made you go "wtf"? >> No.

When at a restaurant, do you put your napkin on your lap? >> Yeah.

Is there a saying you always seem to be using? >> I don’t know, I can never remember this sort of thing on command.

Are you even feeling the least bit tired? >> Yep. It’s bedtime after this. It’s actually over my bedtime because I underestimated how long it’d take me to get through this.

Is there currently any caffeine or alcohol in your system? >> Nope.

Do you prefer electric or manual pencil sharpeners? >> Electric is fine.

Are your biceps at all noticeable? >> Not so much anymore.

Have you ever seen a walrus? >> Not in person.

Do you have a preference: white erasers or pink erasers? >> My preference is good erasers.

Did you ever have one of those easy bake ovens as a kid? >> Nope.

When it comes to dropping food, do you believe in the 10 second rule? >> No, because it’s scientifically unsound. If I do eat food off the floor, it’s while knowing that I’m taking a risk.

When it comes to driving, do you know about the 2 second rule? >> I don’t know about that, no.

If given the opportunity, would you ride on a camel? >> Hell yeah, I’d at least try it.

Do you believe that cellphones actually do cause cancer? >> I don’t fuckin know. Existence causes cancer, tbh, so hey, whatever.

Is there anyone you know who won't get one because of this belief? >> I don’t know anyone like that, no.

When people you know cry, does it make you feel like crying too? >> Nope.

Laughter is universally contageous, right? >> Not necessarily. But I am more likely to laugh when someone else is laughing, because I like to laugh (and find a lot of shit funny).

[othernecessarythings]

back on my bullshit again

and once more!! if you happen to stumble across these posts of mine, please just ignore them.. they’re a way for me to reflect on my life (and improve my english), and while i can’t stop you from reading them, can i say that you probably wouldn’t benefit much from it lol. anyways let’s go

1) Put your iTunes on shuffle. Give me the first 6 songs that pop up.

my lots of songs list: the love club-lorde, river en vacker dröm-håkan hellström, living dead-marina, why we ever-hayley williams, snälla bli min-veronica maggio, take this lonely heart-nothing but thieves

2) If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

oof um the person who will be the love of my life? no lol but like zendaya would be pretty cool ig

3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“... and the top was red-and-white striped, and it all zipped up in the front.”

4) What do you think about most?

hmm my friends maybe?

5) Ever had a poem or song written about you?

not that i know of

6) Do you have any strange phobias?

nah i feel some trypophobia (?spelling) sometimes but that’s it

7) What’s your religion?

i’m kinda christian, but like i choose which parts to believe in and not, like i believe in the message of doing good and love, but not like homophobia or an actual god lol

8) If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

sitting in the sun, listening to music

9) Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

ah probably paramore, yeah it must be them

10) What was the last lie you told?

eh kinda basic but “i’m fine” i guess

11) Do you believe in karma?

ooh that’s a questioning worth discussing, no i don’t believe in the actual the-universe-is-constantly-judging-our-actions, but like that people who do good tend to get good things back? yeah that makes sense

12) What does your URL mean?

my main (neon-places) is from perfect places by lorde, and just neon bc it sounds cool

13) What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

oh god if i only knew,,, i really need to improve my empathy, but my systematical skills are quite good

14) Who is your celebrity crush?

hayley williams

15) How do you vent your anger?

i don’t get mad😌😌 no but like when i get irritated do i just close my door to my room and like listen to music in headphones and solve a puzzle or something lol

16) Do you have a collection of anything?

i kinda collect things that mark an important/memorable event in my life, like my first pride bracelet, my favorite jeans from when i was like 15, lots of birthday cards,, yeah it’s not so unique, but they’re important to me

17) Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

yes!!!! me a few years ago would’ve never thought that i’d be like this now, but i’m proud of myself and what i’ve become!!

18) What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

fun fact i HATE sleeping to the sound of rain. it makes me really anxious,, i love the sound of waves though, or my little sisters pure laugh :,)

19) What’s your biggest “what if”?

what if i’m just faking everything, what if this is not actually me but something i put up to please others around me

20) Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

not ghosts really, but there must be some sort of life in the whole fucking space,, while maybe not what we traditionally would categorize as “life”, must it exist something, somewhere

21) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

i’m in my bed so like. my nightstand to the right, my wall to the left

22) Smell the air. What do you smell?

absolutely nothing, i’m so used to the smell of my house

23) What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

oo idk??? i’m usually quite content with wherever we’re going, although fotografiska in stockholm was shitty though

24) Most attractive singer/s of your opposite gender?

oh um like tyler joseph maybe? gerard way, frank iero? yeah i’m an emo slut

25) To you, what is the meaning of life?

no don’t go there,, thereisnomeaningoflifesoitsallaboutmakingasmuchaspossibleandliveashappilyaspossiblyuntilourfleetingexistenceonthisearthisover

26) Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

.. yeah you could say that i drove, i have a driving license after all, and i’ve never crashed but i’ve been stopped by police a few times lol

27) What was the last movie you saw?

no idea, i never watch movies... or wait!! we had legally blonde on at my friends house a few days ago when we got home from a party, i didn’t exactly watch it but it was playing

28) What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

i’ve had some bad allergic reactions in form of severe eczema

29) Do you have any obsessions right now?

‘the devil and god are raging inside me’ by brand new, doing my makeup a special way

30) Ever had a rumor spread about you?

yeah, that i’m gay and together with my earlier best friend (we were not)

31) Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

not really,, i’m really fucking scared of conflicts so i simply forgive and move on, it’s easier that way

32) What is your astrological sign?

pisces baby

33) What’s the last thing you purchased?

a blue skirt second hand!! v cute

34) Love or lust?

um idk i’ve never really experienced any of them, but maybe love

35) In a relationship?

nope

36) How many relationships have you had?

a whopping amount of zero

37) What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

I DONT KNOW someone tell me please how to get someone to like me,, but like more friendship-like is it usually to always choose my words very carefully to not upset anyone, it usually gets me quite far

38) Where is your best friend?

where? i hope she’s home? well like we took the bus home together a few hours ago, so i guess she’s home

39) What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

aha ha funny,, i was having a small mental crisis so i sat and did math (by free will, school has ended for summer) while listening to melodrama.. yes

40) Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

i don’t know, this is so hard.. but like. no? or it wouldn’t really work to have someone like me as a close friend, i’m to introvert, i tend to surround myself with extroverts who bring me with them to do stuff

41) You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

oh um i call 112 (the swedish 911) and make sure someone else notice the dog too and help it while i hurry to my job

42) You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

a) yes, i think so. only my closest though, to give them a chance to say goodbye properly, but i wouldn’t really like other just acquaintances to reach out just bc of the circumstances

b) i try to travel as much as possible, party all i can, tell everyone i love how much they mean to me and just. live

c) of course, i would be scared to death (see what i did there) but i wouldn’t have any other choice but to fully live my last month

43) What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

hard times by paramore!! it always makes me want to dance

44) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

no

45) How can I win your heart?

show any whatsoever interest in me lol

46) Can insanity bring on more creativity?

i guess,, i’m like the opposite of insanity though, i’m constantly numb and completely lacking any creativity, so it may work the other way too

47) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

hmm maybe my school application? i’m so fucking happy with my choice

48) What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

hmm nothing too special i guess, just the usual loved and missed and so

49) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “heart.”

like the anatomy and stuff,,, i really like biology, more than romances lol

50) Basic question; what’s your favorite color/colors?

usually different shades of blue, but right now all pastel colors, especially purple

51) What is your current desktop picture?

my locked screen is two of my best friends, and my home screen is paramore ofc

52) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

trump would be pretty nice

53) What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

oh um like “name a few things you don’t like about me” or something, bc as i said, i hate conflicts

54) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

the ability to change the probability!!! it’s the ultimate superpower!!!

55) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

my tøp concert maybe? i was really euphoric then, and i haven’t really felt like that since, but i’m afraid i’ll destroy that memory if i could go back so idk

56) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

i’ve had quite a happy life yet, there’s no big thing i’d like to erase,, no i feel like every experience in my life has leaded me to where i am today, so i wouldn’t like to erase anything

57) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

hmm idk maybe alex turner. idk i feel like it would be pretty nice

58) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

italy maybe? my friends and i planned to go there this summer before the corona hit, so i’d like to go there lol

59) Ever been on a plane?

yeah several times

60) Give me your top 5 hottest celebrities.

idk idk i’m not really.. attracted to anyone rn? it’s kinda weird but there’s no one where i’m like wow this person is HOT,, nah i don’t really feel anything like that at the moment

[autpunkenby-blog]

so tonight was the worst night i’ve had in the past 3-4 years.

i’m not sure how much detail i’m going to be able to go into, and about what, but i’ll just start talking about it.

so, i woke up at 4am. don’t ask why, my schedule is really messed up. basically, at around 9am, i was on facebook. i noticed an event invitation. it was to an indie rock show later that night. $10 tickets, which i was able to do, and it was for a band i saw almost 3 years ago! they were really good back then, so i thought i would go just to get out and do something. despite being autistic, i actually usually really enjoy concerts. i just make sure to always have good earplugs, and stick to smaller crowd local shows, that way it’s easier for me sensory-wise. but anyway, i was excited. it was going to be a slightly taxing, but overall fun night. i had already planned that when i got home, i would take a shower, then go to bed. and not to mention that by the time i would get home, i would have been awake for about 24 hours. so i’d be able to fall asleep fairly easy, i figured.

well, i did end up going. and it was fun. it was raining, so that took a little bit more energy out of me to handle than i had anticipated, but i was okay with that. all i needed to do when i got home was take a shower, and then go to sleep!

so, i get home. i have a small bite to eat, and just as i’m finishing, just as i’m about to go take a shower, my mom says something. “oh just so you know, dad took a shower in the main bathroom today”...

so... to basically explain there, my house has 2 bathrooms. one main one by my room in the hallway, and one in my parents bedroom. my dad takes a shower like at least once a week. he says he prefers the water pressure in the main one. i have a bit of a problem with some of the stuff my dad does, stemming from the fact that i’m uniquely disgusted with him, which in turn stems from a few different things. one, being that he’s a smoker, and smoking really, really, REALLY upsets me. aaand uh... also the fact that he’s been occasionally physically abusive to me throughout my life, starting a young age. things ranging from pushing me into walls when i was 11, and when i was 16, he threw me through a table, and then choked me until i almost passed out. no, i haven’t really talked about it before. but anyway, to make a long story short, every time he takes a shower in that specific shower, i have a ritual sort of thing i need to do with the shower to clean it enough for me to have a shower in it myself. it’s pretty well know by my parents that the shower is one of the few effectively calming places for me, so it means a lot to me. i knew earlier that day that there was no way i would have the spoons by the time i got home from a spoon draining CONCERT to clean out the shower if he took a shower in it that day, so i told him that i was going to the concert. now, i know that wasn’t a direct “hey, i know this is your house and you should be able to take a shower if you want but just please not today so that everything isn’t ruined tonight but i need to take a shower when i get home”, but he knows that every single time i go to a concert, i need to take a shower when i get home. he also knows how draining concerts are for me, and WHY they are. he also knows what i need to do whenever he was a shower in that shower, and that it takes a mega ton of my energy. so i mean, i was just hoping he wouldn’t do that today...

no luck.

like i said, it was then after the concert, i was home, needed to still take that shower, and most definitely completely drained of energy from the concert. so, i kind of started to freak out a bit when my mom informed me of that. i kinda started vocally complaining and just getting upset and sorta trying to explain why that fucked me over so bad. i was raising my voice, and my dad ended up coming out from his bedroom. and saying something. can’t remember what, but it was something that really upset me even more. i was starting to go into a meltdown, crying and rocking back and forth, and i ended up kinda tossing my plate to the side, not meaning to do any damage, but yeah, it uh... broke, into pieces. so that happens, and then basically my dad ends coming back out and saying “I AM GOING TO FUCKING TAKE A SHOWER WHENEVER I WANT, IN WHATEVER SHOWER I WANT”. thennn i started shaking... and basically i started slamming my chair into the ground, over and over, and it started splintering.

that’s when my dad came flying out of his bedroom, and basically, it’s a bit of a blur, but i ended up getting choked by him, while i was trying to fight him off and not fall backward, into the pile of broken plate shards, and my mom was screaming her head off, trying to get my dad to stop, and trying to get his hands off of my neck. eventually he stopped. my entire body was violently, and i mean violently, shaking. all of us screaming, my dad threatening to call the police on ME. and have ME removed. i can’t even explain the FUCKING nerve that abusive piece of shit has.  and then we were in the kitchen, and my mom was literally holding him back to the best of her ability while we were straight up all screaming, him while still trying to come towards me but being restrained by my mom, me while hyperventilating and crying.

eventually he went into his bedroom and stayed. i collapsed into a ball by the kitchen sink. my mom ended up sitting beside me and trying to console me. my feet had a few cuts and were bleeding, she helped me clean them up while i sobbed for a good 30 minutes.

what would have happened if my mom hadn’t been there? could i have died tonight? would he have been able to stop on his own before he did any permanent physical damage? i know he wouldn’t have. he dealt permanent mental damage like it was nothing. i could have fallen backwards into those shards, or into or glass table that was pretty much also right behind me.

everything feels gross and dirty. as if i didn’t enough problems with my ptsd. as if i need another horrible scene for my mind to play back for me in what feels like real time whenever i see something that triggers it. as i don’t deal with enough bullshit from my brain.

he’s not the victim here.

[mexcine2]

        The Amazing Colossal Irishman -- Get Outta Town (1960) poster  

Although I generally choose subjects for these essays which—in addition to providing fodder for my witty commentary—are reasonably competent in both an artistic and marketing sense, today’s poster doesn’t necessarily fit that criteria. This poster isn’t especially inspired and doesn’t seem to have that “hook” that might pique the ticket-buying interest of movie audiences. However, Get Outta Town is a sentimental favourite and the poster is worthy of examination.

As noted above, I have a soft spot for Get Outta Town (the movie, not the poster so much). Clearly a low-budget vanity project for actor Doug Wilson, the film has nice noir-ish feel to it, the location shooting adds verisimilitude, and the vernacularised title* draws attention (apparently the working title was “The Day Kelly Came Home,” which isn’t bad; the picture was re-released in 1964 as Gangster’s Revenge, which sounds like a generic translation of a Japanese yakuza movie title).

*[ Get Outta Town was the first in a planned trilogy, to be followed by Fuhgettaboutit and Whatsamattayou.  Alright, that’s totally not true.  As far as I know.]

Most of the behind-the-camera personnel behind Get Outta Town don’t have extensive Hollywood credits. Executive producer William B. Hale might be the same “William B. Hale” who made a 1950s documentary on the Watts Towers entitled “The Towers,” but this is unconfirmed.  Co-producer/director Charles Davis is only cited by IMDB as the director of one other, later independent film (assuming this is the same Charles Davis); cinematographer Larry Raimond has a handful of credits spanning nearly 3 decades.  Scripter Bob Wehling seems to have had the most work experience, directing a couple of features and doing some acting in additional to his writing chores.  Co-producer and star Doug Wilson has a handful of TV appearances on his resumé, and IMDB also indicates he was a film editor, although no credits are provided.

[To be fair, technical credits on episodic Fifties television series are not well documented, so at least some of these people could have been hard-working professionals, just not on theatrical features.  As an aside, Get Outta Town’s on-screen credits are in the familiar “Sixties TV sitcom” font, which subliminally reinforces the television-industry connections of the cast and crew.]

Get Outta Town carries a 1959 copyright date by “MCP Film Distributing Co.” (the production company is listed variously as “Albex Films” and ��Davis-Wilson Productions”) and was released in 1960 by Sterling World Distributors (the 1964 re-release was handled by Beckman Film Corp.).  A fair amount of “paper” can be found for Get Outta Town, including the one-sheet poster illustrated here, lobby cards (I think I even own one), and an insert.

The poster for Get Outta Town (which spells the title Get Outta’ Town, although the film itself doesn’t have the apostrophe) isn’t horrible, but is rather bland.  The yellow background was, for some reason, a popular motif in some Fifties-Sixties cinema posters: perhaps the designers thought it was eye-catching or made the artwork “pop” more than a white  background would.  To me, it signifies “cheap indie film,” though, but I suppose that could be a conditioned response based on the number of posters I’ve seen like this, as opposed to a strictly artistic evaluation.

[More yellow-background posters, from a quick scroll thru www.wrongsideoftheart.com: Carnival Rock, Because of Eve, Cage of Evil, Curse of the Faceless Man, Eighteen and Anxious, Fingerprints Don’t Lie, Girl Fever, Girl on the Run, Liane Jungle Goddess, Red Lips, Right Hand of the Devil, Teenage Zombies, The Violent Years, Wild for Kicks, The Naked Road, Teenage Thunder, Operation Conspiracy, New Orleans Uncensored, Five Guns West, The Party Crashers, Chained for Life, The Incredible Petrified World, The Woman Eater, Voodoo Island, and many more.  The titles alone give you an idea of the class of movies that used the garish yellow background in this era.]

The main image is, of course, of producer-star Doug Wilson.  He’s big, burly, with muscular arms and a hairy chest revealed by his unbuttoned shirt.  There’s a sort of John Wayne-ish vibe about this portrait, and it was probably not coincidental.  I’m of two minds about this.  First, the art does convey the impression of a tough, action-oriented, even working-class protagonist, perhaps a truck driver or an oil rig worker or a longshoreman or a construction boss, etc. (this is somewhat at odds with the tone of the film itself, which is more of an urban crime picture).  On the other hand, Doug Wilson stars in the movie but he’s not a movie star, so a gigantic painting of him, mostly devoid of context, might not be the best sales tactic.  He’s looming over a cityscape, there’s a dead body and two women, but mostly this is DOUG WILSON, TOUGH GUY. Take it or leave it.  

Two women are pictured on the poster.  The poster’s text (to be discussed shortly) suggests these are the protagonist’s “two girl friends,” and we can surmise that Lefty is the good girl (modest top and skirt combo, tasteful necklace) and Righty is the bad girl (spaghetti-strapped gown with a fringed hem, bare shoulders), but they are both awkwardly posed and both share the same shocked and apprehensive expression.  They’re his “girl friends?”  They seem to be regarding him fearfully, not affectionately.  Maybe it’s awe of his massive masculinity that makes them look that way.  

Thus, while the artwork and design aren’t crude or confusing, the exact nature of the film is hazy.  Perhaps the text can clear this up?  But if you’re relying on the printed words on a poster to educate your audience about what to expect, you’ve got one strike against you to begin with.   

The Get Outta Town poster’s text is relatively on-point.  “Kelly turned the town upside down the day they killed his kid brother!”  Got it: revenge motive for town-inversion.  “He took the law into his own hands!”  His own big, meaty, tough-guy hands.  How would you describe Kelly?  “A two-fisted Irishman with two girl friends!” One girlfriend for each fist, it seems.

[Doug Wilson is credited as “Kelly Oleson”—I don’t remember if his heritage is explained in the film itself, but “Oleson” is a “Danish-Norwegian patronymic surname,” according to the unimpeachable source for everything, Wikipedia.  Even if you spell it “Olson,” it’s still Scandinavian, not Irish.  But I guess “two-fisted Irishman” sounds better than “two-fisted Scandinavian.” Unless of course you’re Scandinavian.]

The poster indicates the film has an “All-Star Hollywood Cast.” You keep using those words.  I do not think they mean what you think they mean. Perhaps you do know, you’re just hoping we don’t call your bluff.  “All-Star Hollywood Cast?”  Doug Wilson was in an episode of “Rawhide.” And two episodes of “Science Fiction Theater!” Jeanne Baird did a lot of television in the Fifties and Marilyn O’Connor played “Rita—Saloon Gal” in an episode of “Tombstone Territory.”  The rest of the cast is a mixture of people who made a few other appearances (mostly on television) and those whose sole IMDB claim to fame is Get Outta Town.  So we’ll give them “Hollywood Cast,” but I’m calling shenanigans on “All-Star.”

The text on the Get Outta Town insert poster is significantly different than the one-sheet’s. The top tag-line is hilarious: “ ‘Squirrel’s’ Tongue Slipped!”  No, it’s not an erotic movie shot at a furry convention, “Squirrel” is the name of a minor character in Get Outta Tongue.  He let something slip, you see, “...and Kelly’s Fists Went Into Action!”  [btw, “Kelly’s Fists” would have been a good alternate title for the film.]  “This Irishman cleaned up gangland when police didn’t!”  Also “His love for two girls solved a nasty crime!”  However, it also caused considerable heart-ache.

The poster for Get Outta Town isn’t bad—technically speaking, the art and design are professional—but it’s not unique or compelling, especially given the no-star nature of the production.  In a way that’s too bad, because the film itself is rather enjoyable in its way.