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afemail · 2 years ago

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Reactions to Stray Kids

My grandson loves Minecraft and kept trying to show me videos of other people playing the game. I was truly baffled as to why someone would consider that entertaining. I kept trying to explain to my grandson (he's 7 btw) that I didn't know the game and, therefore, it was not interesting to watch someone else play it. I wasn't learning anything; I wasn't entertained by anything; I wasn't interested. As you can imagine, he didn't understand me either. But I still love him loads!

And now I've found reactors to Stray Kids. I have to admit that it's exciting to watch other people discovering them. I couldn't figure out why it kept pulling me back in. Now I've realized It's sort of like reliving my own discovery. Feeling that excitement again is almost like a drug. Endorphins?

I am a classically trained pianist and a singer -- mostly ballads, American standards, and pop hits covering ... SHIT! ... over 40 years now! I was also a church organist for 15 years. All of that is to say I've experienced A LOT of music.

When I first started watching SKZ music videos, I was mostly watching title tracks. Each video was such a ride and I would have to pause them to catch my breath! There are outfits and accessories. There's group dynamics and interactions. There's backgrounds and scenery. There are colors and choreographies. And, of course, there are handsome, young men in the middle of it all. It's a lot! More often than not, I just watched with my jaw on the floor. I haven't often experienced music this way.

I was 13 years old when MTV premiered, and my family didn't have cable. We were still making cassette mixtapes from the radio and buying 45s of our favorite tunes. There was nothing more frustrating than the DJ who talked over the song you were recording! I saw some music videos when visiting friends' houses but, for the most part, I did not see many. They were usually just footage of the band/singer performing, and not much else. Sometimes, the artists were "acting out" the song, but they were pretty cheesy.

A little over 2 years later in December 1983, Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video premiered. It was such a big deal! He was a massive star and the video was being hyped as a mini-movie. Watch parties were organized and events were planned. My friends and I went to the nearest roller skating rink 5 miles away to watch on their big screens. That is the 1st time I can recall seeing a music video on such a grand scale. It was 15 minutes of great music, (cheesy) acting, and a dance that is still done to this day around Halloween.

and that is JUST ABOUT EVERY SKZ VIDEO !!!

Of course, there is a language difference, and reading subtitles while trying to take in the visuals was often overwhelming. I spent a lot of time watching videos multiple times as well as rewinding and pausing. I also spent a lot of time researching things they'd referenced.

I found myself watching the whole video once through while reading the subtitles. Then I would watch it again to SEE it. Then I would watch it again and try to sync the two. Then I would watch it many more times because I kept finding different approaches to understanding the video. Like, what's up with Hyunjin and apples???

And now that I'm reasonably caught up on MVs (I occasionally still discover one I haven't seen) I have discovered the reactors. There are so many! I didn't realize it was "a thing." People are trying to make a living out of other people watching them watch still other people do what they do. It's actually kind of mind-boggling if you really think about it.

There seem to be an awful lot of people just discovering Stray Kids. I don't know what's driving it, but there have been so many new reactors just in the last couple of weeks. I think I've read that sometimes there are "fake" reactors, but that wouldn't explain all of them. Why so many new ones? Are they just jumping on the bandwagon? Is "the word" getting out there?

I've tried to find reactors who have a history of reactions as well as a reasonable number of subscribers. That tells me that they're doing something right. I have my favorites of course -- Teddy Grey, Handsome Sausages, Amari Leon, and Sebastine. They each analyze rather than just react. The people who just really watch "with" you and say, "Ooh, that was fire!" don't interest me.

But I truly enjoy watching people "discover" Stray Kids. Their hype is invigorating. I will binge a reactor's entire journey into SKZ if they are excited about it. I'm subscribed to so many channels now. Prior to this journey, I was subscribed to about 10. Now It's close to 100.

They just remind me of MY 1st time ;)

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newcatwords · 4 years ago

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where is hawai'i? can you point to it on a map?

if someone asks you to point to hawai'i on a map, where would you point?

before colonization, there was (and continues to be) an island called "hawai'i". the entire chain of islands is called "hawaii" and there is a state called "hawaii" made up of a large number of those islands.

now, because there are too many things named "hawaii," the island of hawai'i is often called "the big island", because o'ahu, the island where the city of honolulu is located, is what many people think of when they think of "hawaii". it's a mess.

on top of that, we have the "main hawaiian islands" (aka "southeastern islands" aka "windward islands") vs the "outer islands" (aka "northwestern islands" aka "leeward islands").

most maps of "hawaii" show only the "main" islands. the map above (created by USGS) shows more of the hawaiian islands, but omits the names of two of the islands in the "main" chain: lana'i & kaho'olawe. these are not insignificant omissions. lana'i is 98% owned by larry ellison, founder & chairman of oracle corporation. kaho'olawe has been relentlessly used & abused by the west. it has been used for ranchland, military training, and most notably, as a munitions testing site, resulting in the continued contamination of the island. after many years of protests & lawsuits by native hawaiians, the island is now only accessible by native hawaiians for cultural, spiritual, & subsistence reasons.

meanwhile, this tourist mug with a creepy colonial-style map of hawaii includes both kaho'olawe & lana'i. good job, tourist mug!

there are actually over a hundred islands in the hawaiian archipelago. the state of hawaii includes 137 of them (source). midway atoll (made up of 3 islands) is part of the archipelago, but not part of the state. it is one of america's territories: an unorganized unincorporated territory.

additionally, some of the islands "are too small to appear on maps, and others, such as Maro Reef, only appear above the water's surface during times of low tide. Others, such as Shark and Skate islands, have completely eroded away." [source: wikipedia page "list of islands of hawaii"].

in the course of writing this post, i failed to find a map that shows & names all the hawaiian islands and failed to even find a list of all of them (plus if an island only appears sometimes or has disappeared entirely, what do you even do with that?). if you find either or both of those, let me know in comments.

so where and what "hawaii" is remains a mystery.

but this has not prevented commercial & official interests from using maps of "hawaii" in all kinds of places! here on the islands, hawaii map imagery is all around.

maps are very common on tourist items:

the hawaiian telcom logo uses dots roughly arranged in the pattern of the islands on a map:

but i guess only five islands are worth including (i understand. branding needs come above all else!).

this souvenir cloth item is interesting because it includes all the main islands (including ni'ihau, lana'i, and kaho'olawe - which are often excluded), but smooshes them into the available space without much consideration for where they are in relation to each other:

the postcard above has the main islands in their rough places, but squishes them all together so that they fit in the space. also the islands are made more similar in size to each other so that you can better see the little illustrations.

here's a more "official" map to show where the islands "should be" in relation to each other, and their sizes relative to each other (although both of those can change depending on what projection the map uses):

in my mind, though, the ultimate hawaii map fantasy lives on the ubiquitous reusable walmart cloth bag (available for 50 cents at checkout to all who have forgotten to bring the right number of bags. there's a plastic shopping bag ban in hawaii.):

in the walmart commercial universe (wcu), the only islands that exist are islands that have a walmart. the general outlines of the islands & their general orientation is preserved (along with a rough topology too!), attempting to convey a sense of adhering to a recognizable reality, but islands without a walmart have been not only omitted, but the space where they would be has been eliminated as well - as if they were never there to begin with. in the walmart version of reality, what makes something "hawaii" is whether or not it has a walmart on it.

i've had a lot of time to think about this remarkable image because i have a whole bunch of these bags. this is the bag of the people - everyone uses it for everything. the one in the above photo is in a typical state - pretty rough - because it probably came from the side of the road. you can almost always find one on the side of the road. so wherever you are, you are probably within sight of the walmart version of the islands.

so why does it matter whether or not you can point to "hawaii" on a map? well, maps are political documents, meaning that they reflect the vision of whoever has the power to put the map in front of your eyes. so if you're the one with the power to make some of the most commonly-seen maps of hawaii and you decide to remove a few islands, well that can really shape what people think "hawaii" is! we're a sea of islands - many people here have only ever been to one or two of the islands. if it wasn't on the map, you might not know that it existed at all.

hawaii is incredibly important to the united states, not just for tourism, but in terms of global strategy. it's the largest outpost of american power in the middle of the pacific. it puts america & its troops half an ocean closer to some of america's biggest competitors, most notably, china. it's a springboard to all the other island territories of the pacific (which you maybe haven't heard of because they almost never appear on maps):

once you see a map of all of america's territories in the pacific, along with the exclusive economic zones (eez) that extend out for 200 miles around each island, you start to get a better feel for the extent of america's power in the pacific.

when a place is left off the map, it can be easy to make it (including its people!) invisible. so if you're america, with bases across the islands of the pacific, with a nightmarish history of atomic weapons testing in the pacific (rendering islands uninhabitable and leaving both land and waters too contaminated for people to use), perhaps you might not want some of these places to appear on the map.

in Foreign Policy in Focus, Khury Petersen-Smith writes:

"Many of us living in North America who are concerned about climate change, for example, have a sense that Pacific Islands are facing particularly severe impacts from rising sea levels. But that knowledge tends to be vague and limited, as actual residents of these islands are rarely invited to the table to speak for themselves.

This is not accidental. Commenting during the Nixon administration on U.S. nuclear testing in the Marshall Islands, which share the same region of the Pacific as Guam, Henry Kissinger said “there are only 90,000 people out there. Who gives a damn?”

The U.S. has long had an interest in Marshallese and other Pacific Islanders remaining “out there” in the American mind. This marginalization helps allow the U.S. to carry out military operations in the region, along with policies that further climate change and other harms, while keeping most Americans unaware of these practices’ impacts in the Pacific." [FPIF]

often hawai'i (and alaska - which is in many ways similar to hawai'i in its relation to the contiguous US) doesn't even appear on national maps of the USA.

here's a screenshot from the new york times homepage on march 21, 2020, just as the coronavirus pandemic was beginning to spread:

there is no alaska and no hawai'i on those maps. so if you were looking for information on the most important issue that was happening at the time, and you live in or are concerned about hawai'i and/or alaska, there would just be nothing. and what does it say about the people who run the top newspaper in america that they decided it was fine to omit these two states? are they not states? do they not matter? do the readers in those states not matter? and this is not an unusual thing at all. it happens all the time.

i'd like to finish by sharing with you a poem by CHamoru poet Craig Santos Perez. CHamoru are the indigenous people of the mariana islands (which include guam, saipan, tinian, rota, and others).

in this poem, Craig Santos Perez writes about not appearing on the map...

“Off-Island CHamorus”

My family migrated to California when I was 15 years old. During the first day at my new high school, the homeroom teacher asked: “Where are you from?” “The Mariana Islands,” I answered. He replied: “I’ve never heard of that place. Prove it exists.” And when I stepped in front of the world map on the wall, it transformed into a mirror: the Pacific Ocean, like my body, was split in two and flayed to the margins. I found Australia, then the Philippines, then Japan. I pointed to an empty space between them and said: “I’m from this invisible archipelago.” Everyone laughed. And even though I descend from oceanic navigators, I felt so lost, shipwrecked

on the coast of a strange continent. “Are you a citizen?” he probed. “Yes. My island, Guam, is a U.S. territory.” We attend American schools, eat American food, listen to American music, watch American movies and television, play American sports, learn American history, dream American dreams, and die in American wars. “You speak English well,” he proclaimed, “with almost no accent.” And isn’t that what it means to be a diasporic CHamoru: to feel foreign in a domestic sense.

Over the last 50 years, CHamorus have migrated to escape the violent memories of war; to seek jobs, schools hospitals, adventure, and love; but most of all, we’ve migrated for military service, deployed and stationed to bases around the world. According to the 2010 census, 44,000 CHamorus live in California, 15,000 in Washington, 10,000 in Texas, 7,000 in Hawaii, and 70,000 more in every other state and even in Puerto Rico. We are the most “geographically dispersed” Pacific Islander population within the United States, and off-island CHamorus now outnumber our on-island kin, with generations having been born away from our ancestral homelands, including my daughters.

Some of us will be able to return home for holidays, weddings, and funerals; others won’t be able to afford the expensive plane ticket to the Western Pacific. Years and even decades might pass between trips, and each visit will feel too short. We’ll lose contact with family and friends, and the island will continue to change until it becomes unfamiliar to us. And isn’t that, too, what it means to be a diasporic CHamoru: to feel foreign in your own homeland.

Even after 25 years, there are still times I feel adrift, without itinerary or destination. When I wonder: What if we stayed? What if we return? When the undertow of these questions begins pulling you out to sea, remember: migration flows through our blood like the aerial roots of the banyan tree. Remember: our ancestors taught us how to carry our culture in the canoes of our bodies. Remember: our people, scattered like stars, form new constellations when we gather. Remember: home is not simply a house, village, or island; home is an archipelago of belonging.

–Craig Santos Perez

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thank you for reading this post! please let me know if you see any errors.

if you'd like to learn more about some important issues in the pacific, here are just a few:

july 2, 2020: "US says leaking nuclear waste dome is safe; Marshall Islands leaders don't believe it" - Los Angeles Times

may 30, 2021: "Pacific Plunder: this is who profits from the mass extraction of the region's natural resources." - The Guardian

april 5, 2021: "75 years after nuclear testing in the Pacific began, the fallout continues to wreak havoc" - The Conversation

june 4, 2021: "Guam won’t give up more land to the U.S. military without a fight" - The World (radio program)

aug. 24, 2021: "The US is building a military base in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Micronesian residents have questions." - The World (radio program)

and if you'd like to learn more about how maps are political, here are a couple articles:

june 5, 2014: "The politics of making maps" by Amanda Ruggeri, for BBC

july 11, 2018: "Politics and Cartography: The Power of Deception through Distortion" by John Erskine, for the Carnegie Ethics Online Monthly Column

#pacific #hawaii #hawai'i #islands #maps #geography

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sagenivydragonfly · 7 years ago

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🌌Wolf Child🌌

(scroll down for story)

Not having a family is harder than you think. Having to watch other children receive presents and hugs from their parents. Its the little things, like watching families ice skate or seeing then get icecream and the laughing. Its the laughing that bothers me the most. I don't think I've really laughed in my entire life. I've tried before. What came out was a ghost of happiness, of real joy. Just an eery sound that brought a shiver to my shoulders and uneasiness to my mind. My hands clung to the cold rails of the ice rink. I couldn't afford to go in. I just watched no money. No anything. Just the clothes on my back. Id managed to swipe them from a donation bin. Tan skinny jeans and boots two sizes to small. The only thing I liked about my clothes was my coat. A blue denim jacket lined with fleece and little yellow buttons with matching yellow pockets. The boots dug into my toes almost telling me what everything told me, "You've been here too long, No one wants to here. Time to leave. I gazed at the families holding hands one last time and walked away. I don't know where I was going. Just away.I was adopted and for a short while I had a family. My parents dumped me when was 10. Id always had issues with anger. They decided it was a good reason to get rid of me. Parentless again. Ive been living on my own for a while stealing and begging for food and clothes. Im not old enough for a job being 12. So until then im here. I was knocked out of my daze by a sign. The town line. Id walked too far. Ahead of me was forest. I stood for a while trying to figure out where to go next. For some reason I walked forward. So dumb. I noticed the trees slowly getting darker their leaves were harder to make out individually. I keep walking. Suddenly I snap out of it and realize what Ive done. Nightfall. I can barely see my hand in front of me. I panic. I don't know the way back let alone where I am. I can hear my heart pounding I run. My breathing ragged. I need to get out. Faster faster! I push on. Miles and miles, the sheer force of adrenaline and will to live forcing my body on. I feel im about to pass out. Then out of no where Thump! I hit something! Wait something hit me! Im on the ground now. Looming over me is a form. I hear a growl and from above something wet and slimy drips onto my face. The gaping maw closes over my shoulder. I claw and scream hit and kick but im too exhausted to fight anyone "No! No! No..."I let it consume me I pass out.

I hear sounds but they sound faint and watery my head feels like its under water. I try to move. My head throbs. I groan. I force my eyes open. I look up. Trees are above me and I hear birbs chirping. Where am I? This isn't the city. I sit up dizzy and disoriented. Im in the spot I was last night. I jolt to attention. That thing...from last night what was it? Was it real was it a dream? I move my arm and yell out. My coat is on the ground next to me my shirt is torn. I move the fabric to expose a few scabbed over punctures in my left shoulder. It was defiantly real. I try to stand up. I wobble. "Ugh" I gather my coat and put it on. At least I still have this. I pick a direction and I begin walking. My stomach growls. I haven't eaten in 2 days. Maybe ill starve. That wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. I stop. Leaves are crinkling. Its not me. Something runs near, only a few trees away. I can't see through the thickness of the forest. Fear. I dash off. My hunger overtakes me. Im not as fast as before. Im weak and tired. I have nothing left. I stop. Keeling over and wheezing. I almost choke my guts out breathing so hard. Finally it doesn't hurt to break I stand up. No. I look straight into the eyes of a Grey wolf. I freeze. No where to go now. Nowhere to hid. A deer in the open. Almost begging to be eaten. He doesn't move. I look panic in my eyes. He doesn't look angry but he doesn't look away. A menacing stare. Could melt ice with that gaze. I look away. He sits. I try to slowly back away. He growls. I stop. He stops growling. I sit. We look at eachother. Im confused on what to do and scared about being eaten alive. He yawns. I being and idiot scoot towards him. He cocks his head. He doesn't know what I am. I wonder what hes alone. Hes not the biggest wolf but hes not small. Hes dark grey with black guard hairs. Yellowy amber eyes cunning and sharp. But something about his eyes now are soft and inviting. I suddenly want to touch his fur. I reach my hand out. He looks at me and does nothing. I begin to lower my hand. He shoves his muzzle into my hand. Im shocked. Hes soft. I gently pet his muzzle. I look at his eyes again. He respects me it seems. Im still going to be careful. We spend the rest of the day walking and sitting infront of eachother. I wonder why he didn't eat me in the first place. Was he lonely? Im lonely. Wheres his family. Its dark again. Im scared. What is in this forest. I instinctively grab onto him. He makes a noise. A nonthretaning noise. I rest my hand on his back and let him lead. We come to a clearing. I think he sleeps here. There's a tree with a hole at the base. He leads me there and I follow him inside. The floor is dirt and smooth. He turns around 3 times and curls up in a corner I do the same and laugh. I cover my mouth. A real laugh. Im astonished. A wolf made me laugh. I giggle and close my eyes, drifting to sleep.

Morning. The birds are chirping again. I look for the wolf. Hes standing in the clearing. He needs a name. So do i. I sit next to him and study him. He sniffs some Wild Thyme. "Aha!" he looks up questioning me. I point at him "Thyme!" he sniffs the thyme again. My stomach growls. He runs off. I get worried. I wait 30 min. He comes back with a squirrel. He sets it down infront of me. I look at him. Im silent for a few min. I finally give in a start tearing of chunks of meat and stuffing it on my mouth. There's barely any taste. But food is food.

Over the next few days Thyme and i become good friends. He hunts and I spot his prey from up in a tree. Thyme gave me a wolf name it kinda sounds like "Aaaaaru!" I laugh all the time now.

Years have passed and I still live here. Ive outgrown everything except my coat an pants. Im 15 now old enough to work. Thyme showed me the way back to the city a along time ago. I never wanted to go back. I say goodbye and that ill come back.

I walk down the main street. Things have changed. Its been 3 years after all. I go to the donation box. I freeze. There in the pile is a fuzzy wolf hat with paw gloves attached. The same color as Thymes coat. I snatch it immediately. "Hey.Hey!you can't take from there!" I don't even see whose yelling. I ran before I could look i put it on my head. Im homeless anyways. I ran to the other side of town. Sliding down the wall onto the ground I sit. "Hey you." I turn around. "Youre fast" "me?" she nods. "Thanks?" I nervously reply. "You got the legs on ya that you could deliver my baked goods to the customers in the knick of time! Would ya like a job missy?" "uh...Oh! Yes yes definatly!" "Come on in then! Oh by the way what's your name?" Oh crap I don't have one. "Uh...uh...Aaru?" she nods. I take a deep breath and begin a normalish life.

It has been a year since I last saw Thyme. I went back a month later but he wasnt there. I walked the whole forest and he was gone. I screamed the name of my best friend and brother and only family as loud as I could. Nothing. Now I walk through that forest for the millionth time. I sit by the clearing and the tree with the hole. I rest my weary legs. I hold my arms out and cry pretending he was there. I felt him but it wasnt real. I cried into his fur and sobbed against his chest. I opened my eyes. I stared into the eyes of my old friend. He was missing a part of his front leg, he was covered in battle scars and he looked like he had been to hell and back. I didn't care. I had my family. But I hadnt even begun to realize what happened to him. Finding out may be to gruesome

For now we wait in eachother arms. Two wolves

A family

🌌A pack🌌

I really worked hard on this so if anyone reads it im so happy, but also surprised cause its suuuuuper long aaa 🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌

#art #traditional drawing #dragonflykit #books #wolves #wolf child #writing #writers

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pbandjesse · 7 years ago

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I wanted to start this post about an hour ago but I finish watching hereditary and I was so horrified that I had to take a break and watch a couple videos. I mean they were videos about hereditary so it's not like I did much to fix the situation but stop. I'll come back and talk about the movie later in the post.

Today in general has been rough. I'm very tired. Working all week teaching and then doing 3 days in a row at ships is not going to be able to work in the future. I can do overnights but 3 solid 8 hour days after the emotional struggle of teaching, is just way too much for me. Today was very hard. There were good parts. But I feel very tired and I don't know how I'm going to make it through tomorrow. If I felt like I could get away with it I would ask James to switch with me. But honestly the whole day is going to be really really tough. And even though he's doing the lunch shift I don't think it's going to make much of a difference for me.

I slept okay. But I felt pretty terrible when I got up. I let myself stay in bed for an extra couple minutes and got dressed and made breakfast. Pack my lunch. I'm headed out. I got downtown and the river rank is almost finished being put together. I found out that it's $10 per skate but they have a season pass for $150. That might be worth it for me. Since my skating classes last year were just about that and only once a week. So if I get 250 as long as I go 15 times over the season it pays for itself. I'm not making a decision yet but I might be able to work at my budget depending on how long the season is. So I'm waiting to hear back from the email I sent to find out. But that would be really nice for me. Because I could go in the morning before I have to go teach and I would really really love that.

Work was okay. It was just exhausting and I felt very done. But me and Frank open the building. And I made my charge. He said I did a good job and I even gave him attempt on folding the tin foil. I started the day at the desk and mostly played online. Read the news. James came at 10:30 and got me a donut. It was pretty chilly outside and I had brought my wool coat out of storage this morning to wear. I felt very Shippy. And it was an okay day. I always liked working with James.

I was in charge of doing the firing today. And I wasn't not looking forward to it because I do want to be fully qualified on it. But as I was getting ready I realized we only had one primer. Was. We're supposed to have 4 firings this weekend. And if my firing didn't go well the first time we were out of luck. We only had the one chance. And of course I had the most people I've ever had in a crowd watching me. But between my ramming and Frank priming it over and over again. We had a good firing. And I felt very proud of myself at the end of it. Especially because it was right on time at noon.

I had lunch and watched videos. I still felt too tired and really just wanted to go home. But I tried to make the best of it. Having lunch helped. I'll talk to some really nice gifts and was able to share some of my knowledge and stories about constellation. And that was enjoyable. I was going to the desk for a while. And then me and James are outside together. And soon enough it was the end of the day. I felt bad that we didn't have a second firing because a couple people had wanted to see it but hopefully that gets dealt with. I'm not pleased that I'm going to be there tomorrow and have to find out what's going to happen about it. I really really wish I didn't have to be there.

I had been spending basically half the day contacting Marcus from access the elementary school about picking up the cat. And I gave him James's number so they could communicate. I sort of wish I had gone to James's house so that I could help get the cat in the carrier and give Marcus some tips. These Marcus didn't end up getting to him until almost 8. And I totally could have gone over there then done that. But what's done is done and I'm glad the cat is in his new home and I really hope he drives with him. He seems like a really sweet cat even though he needs his nails trimmed.

I had dinner and I did laundry. And while my clothes are in the dryer I took a bath. And put my movie on. Hereditary was one of the roughest movies I have ever watched. Like it's beautifully shot and the story was compelling and the characters were well developed. I felt every emotion that they were going through. Enough that was in the first 15 minutes I thought I was going to throw up because of something that happened to the characters and I cried. In a horror movie I cried at the emotions that these characters were feeling. It was way too long. And the ending was outrageous. I would not watch it again but I do want to read more about it and explore some of the themes. Because some of the parts of the movie were wonderful. But I would not sit down and watch the entire 2 hour 5 minute movie again. It was just way too much for me. And I have seen some shit. Like really bad shit and this movie really upset me. But I'm glad I watched it. Because I don't know it felt like I proved something to myself about being able to focus again. So it was nice to be able to watch an entire movie. After it was finished I called James because I couldn't text him my feelings about this movie. I just had a lot I had to say out loud. But I'm glad that we got to talk for a few minutes.

I finished putting away my laundry and I checked the mail. Just sent me a package with the cutest little squishy dinosaur. So now I'm for sure getting a clear backpack to keep all of my cute charm plushies in. But really I still feel nauseous and it's daylight savings so I'm getting an extra hour of sleep so I don't feel so bad staying up to watch videos for a pallet cleanser. I'm going to go wash my face and have a snack and continue to cuddle with sweet pea who has been so affectionate tonight. He keeps trying to push his face into my nose. Wish me luck getting through tomorrow because it's going to be a lot for me. I hope you all sleep well tonight. Good night

#ootd #work #sky #grass #good day #tired #hereditary #saturday

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deadimagineblog · 7 years ago

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Trouble Comes In Threes (Triplet!AU) (2/?)

Modern!AU, College!AU. This is my first triplet AU post but I'm gonna give it my best! Fem!S/O just so you know! There will be smut NSFW, but not in this part. So lets start!

Tag List: @secretlyshycomputer

Part Two!

° You see good old Ben standing against your car, looking at his phone and typing away on it. His face seemed frustrated, but when you walked up to him, he smiled warmly. "You ready?" He asked. You looked at him with a skeptical eyebrow raised. "Kylo still not answering you?" You asked and his smile fell a small amount. You could tell Ben was really trying.

° "No he answered, but said he was busy. I told him it was just one dinner with family, but he says we are here permanently, and he'll catch us next time," Ben stated, frustrated again. He seemed to be thinking when he suddenly lit up. "Here, take a picture with me," he asked, and you leaned into him and both of you stuck your tongues out and made funny faces and he snapped a photo and turned it around so both of you could see. "That one is cute, Ben, send it to me," you stated smiling at him but he was busy sending it to his brother.

°Ben: Got a cute friend with me who wants to meet you. [Picture Attachment]

Kylo: She's just your friend, Ben?

Ben: Yeah! She really wanted to meet my brothers, Crylo. You're ruining the fun.

Kylo: ...Fine. But I can't stay out long, I've got to finish these class packets before Monday.

Ben: Oh so when its just me and Matt its no, but a cute girl there and you're all about it. >:O

Kylo: Shut up, Ben.

° "He sounds like me," you say with a laugh as he pockets his phone with a triumphant smile on his face. You both hopped into the car, you making Ben drive now because your legs were still tight from that morning. You both smiled and laughed at one another as he let the GPS led him to the spot that Matt had suggested to him on the phone the day before. When you yawned loudly, he pushed your knee with his big hand, "No none of that, I'm planning on keeping you out all night," Ben teased, squeezing your knee as you whined loudly about how he should have waited till tomorrow before dragging you out and about. As if to drown you out, he turned up the radio to be blasting as he drove, grinning at you. You shook you head and instead of whining, you merely sang with the radio obnoxiously with him. The drive wasn't too long, about 15 minutes to the other side of the small town the university was located in. When you seemed to be approaching the location, he turned the radio back to a normal level. "I think you'll like this place, Matt took me here when I came out to visit for New Years."

° "Is it pizza?" You asked hopefully and he laughed, "It has pizza. And loud music," and you smiled widely. "Ah, yes my two favorite things." He pulled the car into a parking spot, and when he turned off the car, you could tell he wasn't kidding about the loud music, hearing the bass thump through the very foundation itself. You got out of the car, running a hand through your hair, ruffling it. You wore just a simple outfit, an oversized black t-shirt with a band logo on the front of it and jean shorts because it was still pretty hot outside. You walked with him to the front door, seeing a large man standing by the door. At first you thought it was some sort of bouncer and you were momentarily worried about what kind of place this was. It wouldn't surprise you if this was a damn strip club in some joke Ben that would be funny. As you got closer though, you realized it may have been the last brother just by the way looked. He was like Matt with no facial hair covering his strong chin, and his hair was that jet black that Ben had. He was dressed in a black shirt and black jeans that fit his frame almost perfectly. His hair was longer than Ben's, full wavy locks touching his chin. You smiled at the man but full lips stayed planted in a straight expression.

° "Crylo!" Ben stated with excitement and his brother looked away from you. Kylo reached out a hand to shake his brother's hand in greeting but Ben instead pulled his brother into a tight hug as he had done with Matt and you put your hand over your mouth to keep from laughing at Kylo's exasperated expression as he was squeezed tightly by his brother. When Ben released his brother from his tight hold, Kylo stepped back, rolling his eyes at brother's affection but this time he at least had the beginnings of a smile on his face. "Kylo this is my best friend Y/N, Y/N this is the little brother Kylo," he introduced as you put your hand out to shake Kylo's hand, his large hand covering yours almost completely. "Nice to meet you, Kylo. I've heard a lot about you from Ben."

° "All bad things I'm sure," Kylo stated, deep voice rumbling as he turned his gaze back down to you. You smiled widely and answered, "Mostly, yeah." This made Kylo chuckle gently as they heard a voice come up behind them.

°"Y-you actually did it, Ben. I never thought you'd pull him out of his cave," Matt's soft teasing making Kylo scowl at his brother as Matt walked up and stood beside you. Ben seemed to light up suddenly. You couldn't help but smile at his reaction to having his brothers all around him like he wanted. He opened the door and let everyone walk ahead of him before he rushed to the counter to beat Kylo there. You stayed beside Matt, who made pleasant conversation with you. He was wearing a warm colored orange polo, and dark jeans. When he tried to move forward to pay for his part of everything, you hooked your arm with his and held him back with you. He turned to look at you with confusion, cheeks dusting with pink as you smiled at him.

° "For science reasons, stay with me just for a second so I can see them interact to see how bad it is," you asked him, and he laughed but nodded. "Its almost like they try to outdo one another all the time," Matt answered and almost on cue you heard Ben laugh a hearty laugh. It almost sounded fake.

° "I dragged you out Kylo, I'll take care of it!" Ben teased about to slide his credit card to the clerk but Kylo took his card instead and handed it to the clerk. "Its gonna be four of us," Kylo stated to the clerk.

° "How many tokens, sir?" The clerk asked boredly, looking at the triplets with some interest, probably because of how attractive each was. Ben smiled at the clerk, "Lets do 40 first," before looking at Kylo with the same smile. "How about I get the tokens and skates and you can get the pizza?" Ben tried to offer as a compromise. Kylo looked at Ben before he sighed almost in irritation, putting his hand out to the clerk who handed his card back to him and Ben handed his card over with a smile, but he seemed almost exhausted now. You let go of Matt's arm with a pat and moved over to Ben and wrapped his arm into yours and grinned up at him. He seemed to perk up immediately and he moved his arm up and wrapped it around your shoulders.

° As you both walked in, you saw why Ben thought you would like this place. It was, firstly, gigantic. There was a full roller rink in the back of the place and an arcade and concession stand at the front by the door and chairs and tables where college students were gathered and eating huge pizzas. Ben, Matt, and you moved over to pick up your rented skates and Kylo moved over to order the pizza. "That wasn't so bad, Ben," Matt stated hopefully to which Ben stopped smiling for a moment before shaking his head and looking back at his brother. "No, it wasn't so bad. I told him I would cover everything though..." He trailed off but soon the person behind the counter handed his skates to him and he smiled at the employee and led him and Matt over to the table they were planning on sitting and beginning to put on their skates. You waited for your skates patiently as you felt someone stand next to you. You looked up to see Kylo standing next to you and you smiled up at him.

°"So I heard you got a job as a teaching assistant. What subject?" You asked curiously and he answered.

° "Psychology," he answered with a simple straight word. You nodded at the answer before adding, "Yeah you seem like the kind of guy that wants to get into people's heads," teasing him gently, and he didn't answer. You grabbed your skates from the employee, thanked them, and moved over to Ben and Matt, Matt standing shakily on his skates. Jesus they were even taller in skates. You began to unlace your shoes and stated gently so it was just them who could hear you. "Not much of a talker is he," to which Ben nodded with a roll of his eyes.

° "M-more of a brooding kind of guy," Matt agreed, "He's a good guy, just obsessed with work and school and isn't much for idle conversation." Ben quickly cut in, "Come on Matty, lets get out there and show these people how its done. Maybe find a girl you can skate your way into," Ben nudged Matt's shoulder and you looked at Matt's face.

° "You're disgusting and w-we should wait for Y/N," Matt said bluntly. However you waved them away, "Go ahead guys, these are boots so its gonna take a while," you assured Matt who was suddenly under the arm of Ben who was leading them to the rink. You smiled after them and kept unlacing your boots as Kylo sat down next to you and began putting on his own skates as well. There was silence for a moment, you assuming he wasn't interested in talking. You pulled off both your boots and began to lace up your skates on your feet. He spoke coolly.

° "So, you and Ben?" He asked calmly, looking at you as he tied a small bow on his skate. You laughed and shook your head, "He wishes but no. I don't want to be another notch in his bed post. We are good friends though, I adore him to pieces," you spoke honestly, "If he ever wanted to calm down, I'd probably consider it. But I'd never ask him to stop doing what he wants. I'd go so far as to say that is just part of who he is. And I love him for it. What about you, anybody in your life?"

° You watch him shake his head, his hair moving with the motion, "I had a pretty bad break up at the end of the last year, I haven't really been looking to go through that again." You nodded as you stood up from your spot, skates securely on your feet. "I feel that, man. My ex broke up with me over a text because I didn't get into the school he wanted me to get into," as he finished tying up his skates, you held out your hand to help him up which he surprisingly took and you had to brace yourself to pull the tall man up, "But hey, new year, new job, new opportunities. Maybe we can find someone worth our time." You finished, smiling at Kylo before releasing his hand and Kylo nodded, "Maybe."

° You left his side then, skating over to Matt, looking at the scene before them. Ben had found someone to talk to, of course. What else would he be doing. You smirk and roll your eyes as you skate next to Matt nonchalantly as you both look at Ben as you skate by. The girl was pretty cute, you supposed you couldn't really blame him. "W-wasn't this supposed to be like a bonding thing?" Matt's soft voice reached your ears and you turned and shrugged. "I'm only here as a referee, otherwise I'm clueless," you stated with a laugh. You figured you'll enjoy the company you had, "So what's your major, Matt?" His eyebrows furrowed together for a moment, looking genuinely surprised that you asked him something to get to know him but he recovered quickly and answered.

° "T-theoritical Physics, I also plan in minoring in Technology. What about you?" He asked curiously, giving you a smile. You answered his question and you happily continued a conversation with him. He was a nice personality, still a little timid but he seemed to warm up to people quickly. You had been chatting him up basically, being just a little bit flirty but making sure only to keep his blushing to a minimum. "So Matt, is it true that blondes really have more fun?" You asked teasingly and were happy to see you making him laugh a little bit. He was about to respond when his smile suddenly disappeared as someone rushed past him, the speed made a wind kick past both of you and right behind it was another blast of wind. Both of you watched as two out of three Solos were racing around the rink. Ben had a look of pure determination, probably because he was losing, meanwhile Kylo was rolling up his sleeves as he speed skated backwards around the ring. You could feel Matt get nervous next to you, but he also almost hissed.

° "S-showboats just like our Grandfather always was," Matt stated bitterly as you both watched the two dark haired men speed around the rink. But suddenly Ben had grin as he suddenly slid towards Kylo, since he was skating backwards he couldn't keep up the speed he had at first so Ben zoomed past him pretending to pass the finish line, arms up in the air as he past you and Matt once again, the most smug look on his strong features. Matt rolled his eyes but suddenly his side was empty as you skated up to Ben to be next to him. "Benny boy, play nice," you stated with a smirk and he smirked as well as he turned around to skate backwards and look at you. "He started it, I swear," Ben stated, lifting his hand up to show he meant it.

° "Sure he did," you stated, faking that you didn't believe him. "Whatever, kid." You both stuck your tongues out at each other before he leaned forward pretending to try and put his tongue on yours before he suddenly had to catch you. You almost fell because you were trying to avoid his tongue but he caught you in his arms before you both started laughing. You skated together. Ben occasionally looking over to his brothers who were talking to each other and staring at the two of you.

° You finally sit down when your pizza is brought out. And the thing really is freaking huge, with these 3 giants and yourself, you guys barely finish the half of the damn thing. After eating, you, Ben, and Matt take off your skates, but don't bother putting on your shoes because you all knew you'd be going back on the rink. Kylo however put his shoes on. He did say he didn't plan on staying long, maybe he planned on leaving soon. Ben pulled you and Matt over to the arcade as you both held and enormous amount of tokens in your pockets. Matt immediately went for the old school games, Pac-Man, Space Invaders, Cinepede, the classics. Meanwhile Ben had moved over to the more physical ones, basketball, whack-a-mole, things like this. Lastly, you had sat down at a Jurassic Park game, the one where you sat down in something that looked like the Jeep from the movie and there were spots for two people, and two plastic guns, one red one blue. You set your tokens on the plastic "dashboard" and started filling in coin after coin. You pressed the start button and began.

° These games were something you just couldn't resist. Plus it had freaking dinosaurs. Who could honestly resist dinosaurs? You began, and it started out easy enough. But soon you were overwhelmed. "Ben!" You called to the side, filling in more coins and pressing the start button so you didn't lose your place. "Busy!" Ben called over to you as he shot basketballs into a moving hoop. "Matt Matt Matt!" you called over to the other side but you got no answer. You dared to look over to see Matt with his eyes two inches away from the screen and was obviously deep in concentration. You weren't sure if Kylo came over to the arcade at all but you were gonna try anyway. "Kyl--" Knock knock, you looked over to see a man move to sit next to you. You chanced to look over and saw Kylo himself, "--Oh. Quick quick, start button!" but he was already two steps ahead of you. He grabbed the red gun and slammed his fist on the start button. You immediately felt the stress of the game lift off your shoulders as Kylo began to help out. You both cleared the level no problem but soon the next one began and you two stayed at the ready. It was... Intense. Both of you were so focused, neither really noticed that Ben and Matt had moved to be next to the game, peeking over your shoulders to see the game. You didn't really notice until when you both finished the next level and Ben cheered for you loudly and you almost jumped out of your skin. You laugh at your reaction as does he but when you suddenly become serious again and gun points at the screen, he laughs even louder.

° You were getting close to the end, you and Kylo had blasted through most of the last level, but now here you both were, face to face with the mighty, the powerful, god of dinosaur world, the T-Rex. Ben had his hand on your shoulder while Matt cheered on Kylo with quiet cheers. "Left Left Left!" You stated loudly and Kylo pointed his gun and shot. That was it. The machine rattled and roared as the T-Rex fell and the credits began to roll. Ben and Matt cheered loudly as you and Kylo kept watching the screen. As the high scores came up, your score traveled up the screen and a small tune played through the speakers as you and Kylo took the lead! "Oh wait quick quick!" You pulled out your phone as Kylo put your first initial, and "&" symbol, and then a K to finish it off. You pulled the man close to you by his shoulder and smiled brightly. Kylo didn't really give a full smile, but a little half one as you snapped the photo. You pulled it back and showed it to him.

° "Very nice, you look cute," Kylo spoke simply before taking your phone from your fingers delicately and you watched over his shoulder as you sent the photo to what you could assume was his phone number before he handed your phone back. You usually would have said atleast something to the fact that he just grabbed your phone without asking, but you were honestly a little confused. He just called you cute, right? Or at least, that you looked cute? Weird. You showed the picture to Ben and he said that you did look pretty cute but that was pretty much par for Ben. "Send it to me so I can send it to mom!" Ben said and you looked a little offended.

° "Excuse me, Ben, I can send it to Miss Organa my damn self. She gave me her number before we left!" You teased, but you still sent it to him anyway. Ben had a thing for pictures. Capturing a moment to have forever. You climbed out of the jeep, Kylo doing the same before he turned to his brothers and pulled them over. You assumed it was to say goodbye for the night. You waved goodbye to Kylo as he turned to leave and he gave a small goodbye as well. Matt smiled and explained he better get heading out too, before asking if he could have half of the half of pizza you had left. You grabbed him a box and packed it for him while he put on his shoes. "Oh, Matt let me get your number, we can go get coffee or something soon," you stated with a smile as you saw that pink blush spread across his cheeks and the bridge of his nose once again.

°"O-okay," he stated, smiling back and he said his number to you before waving goodbye to you and Ben and heading out with his pizza in tow. As soon as he walked out the door, Ben leaned over and rested his head on top of yours, sighing softly.

° "That went pretty well," you stated gently, raising your hand and scratching his head before running fingers through his hair gently before feeling him nod. "They like you. Kylo just told me not to scare you away," he laughed, standing up straight and moving over to your table. "Want to go back on the rink one more time before we go?" He asked and smiled as you nodded happily. Both of you pulled on your skates and headed back to the rink. You two had your pinky fingers linked as you skated around the rink, talking warmly before Ben came in for a hug. These weren't exactly a rare occurrence, Ben was a touchy-feely kind of guy and loved physical contact. But sometimes when he went in for those long hugs, those that meant something to him. And after getting a few of them by this time in your friendship, you took them seriously and always hugged him tightly back. He rested his face into your hair, just purely relaxed. "Thank you for coming tonight, Y/N. I really appreciate it." He stated sincerely. You smiled against him and nodded happily warm in his embrace.

#triplet!au #triplet!kylo #triplet!ben #triplet!matt #college!au #modern!au #star wars x reader #kylo ren star wars #star wars imagine #star wars fanfiction #star wars #ben solo x reader #ben solo #kylo ren x you #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren #kylo x reader #matt the radar technician #matt the technician

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howaminotinthestrokesyet · 4 years ago

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Talk To Me Now I’m Older: The Strokes in Quotes

I'm happy to feed the illusion that I'm a lazy recluse.

-Julian Casablancas

A band is a good way to break up a friendship.

-Julian Casablancas

If the choice is between doing something supercool and having no one hear it and doing something equally cool and tricking people into putting it on the radio, I don't think the second option is some big sellout.

-Julian Casablancas

I find it funny how people from Boston and New York hate each other because of pro teams. But, like, everyone on the Red Sox is a random millionaire athlete from somewhere else.

-Julian Casablancas

One of the big songwriting things for me has always been: always think what you do sucks. Because the second you stop believing that, you suck. And that's a fact.

-Julian Casablancas

I think a lot of people study the rules too much and then don't know how to be creative.

-Julian Casablancas

People often put me in a V-neck tennis club sweater, driving a Bentley, but my life wasn't like that.

-Julian Casablancas

When you first start writing a song, it's fun, then when you start recording it, it's fun, but by the time you've finished recording it, you're sick of it.

-Julian Casablancas

I'm a really firm believer that anyone can get pretty good at anything if you just do it all the time and you just keep working at it.

-Nick Valensi

I abhor television. Notice how i said ‘television’ and not ‘TV’ because TV is a nickname and nicknames are for friends and television is no friend of mine.

-Nick Valensi

The other day my daughter said, ‘Daddy, guess who my favorite Stroke is?’ And I thought she was going to say me because, oh man, she loves me so much, and she said: ‘Julian! Because he’s the singer

-Nick Valensi

I love working on new stuff. I love the feeling of a new idea and watching it evolve. That's one of my favorite parts of making music.

-Nick Valensi

The weird thing is, I used to skate in front of, like, 5,000 people and I was never nervous, but the first time I got on stage, there were four people there and I vomited.

-Albert Hammond, Jr.

After boarding school in Switzerland, at, like, 14 or 15, my life clicked, and I just realized, 'I don't want to be like anyone around me at my school. I don't think the world revolves around money.'

-Albert Hammond, Jr.

You know when you become friends with someone, you don't even remember? When you weren't friends? You're just kinda like, 'When were we not friends? When I met you, weren't we just already friends?' I have the same thing with the Strokes guys.

-Albert Hammond, Jr.

The Strokes, you bond when you're 18, and you're friends. The feeling's different. When all of us get into a room, we feel like the same people from before. We weren't anybody; we were just hanging out. It's hard to understand if you're not in a band. You're one-fifth.

-Albert Hammond, Jr.

Sometimes you wanna be James Bond, and sometimes you wanna be Marlon Brando until you realize you can't be either!

-Albert Hammond, Jr.

Having this kind of spectrum of sound now, I listen to 'Is This It' and I see us as youngsters and I almost want to have a conversation with the 18-year-old me.

-Fabrizio Moretti

We were talking about how we wished we had enjoyed the time, like when we were touring in that little van. We wished we had really taken the time to look around and be happy about where we were. I enjoyed it, but it was always hand in hand with fear and this drive to get to the next levels. I was never looking around so much.

-Fabrizio Moretti

I've discovered this trend in popular criticism that because our first record was such a -- critical darling ... that now people are hesitant to give us too many accolades. We didn't know exactly how we needed to change. But we knew from the experience from 'Room on Fire' where people, where critics mainly, were saying that it was sonically too similar to the first record, we needed to step up.

-Fabrizio Moretti

We wanted to rehash the feeling of playing when nobody ever knew us, but it's impossible to do.

-Nikolai Fraiture

There were subtle pressures, and we didn't really realize where they were coming from, and we had just come back from a tour, a crazy tour, and we were still wet behind the ears and had no idea really what a second album meant.

-Nikolai Fraiture

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