#i.m. schnoogle

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

Why don't you go down to the grocery store and sit in the dairy section? That way everyone will know YOU are the head cheese!

Bugs Bunny to I.M. Schnoogle

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: Hello, Bugs. Fun-filled evening planned for tonight?

Bugs: Well, as a matter of fact...

Schnoogle: Then I'm sure you filed your paperwork correctly, for once.

[Bugs smiles innocently]

Schnoogle: Your stunned silence is very reassuring.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: If you don't come save me, I'm going to fire you Bugs.

Bugs: (over the radio) You gotta try to hold on, Doc! I'll be back soon!

Schnoogle: Bugs... You're fired...

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: Thanks for coming in, Bugs. Bugs: Sorry I'm late, Mr. Schnoogle. Schnoogle: You better have a darn good excuse. Bugs: Nope. Schnoogle: Take a second? Make something up? Bugs: Nope. Schnoogle: Interesting.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: Oh, hello, Bugs. I wasn't aware I was paying you to socialize. Bugs: You're not. I'm off the clock. I.M Schnoogle: Well, isn't that convenient for you? And the clock.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: Ha ha ha! Get back to work! Bugs: Who's the big hot bag of air, who doesn't have to comb his hair? Who doesn't bathe and doesn't care, Schnoogle, Schnoogle, yay, Schnoogle!

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: No buts except yours out the door! Now shut your yap and get to work. Bugs: Mr. Schnoogle, whatever happened to please and thank you? Hmmm. Oh wait here they are.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: A man's TV should reflect his age. You're 18, 18 inch. When you turn 27, 27 inch. One of these monsters will last me till I'm fifty. Bugs: You're not fifty? Schnoogle: You're not fired?

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: [while on hold with Bugs] I wish I could fire Bugs.

Bugs: I'm still here, doc.

I.M Schnoogle: Err... OK, Bugs. Thank you.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: I thought you were going to tell me something really important. Bugs: So did I, but I just managed to avoid it.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: Get the heck out of here, you're fired! Bugs: I have a better solution. You keep me on the payroll as an outside consultant and in exchange for my salary, my job will be never to tell people these things that I know. I don't even have to come into the office, I can do this job from home.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

Is this not what you don't want me not to do?

Bugs Bunny to I.M. Schnoogle

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

Bugs: I was just listing my friends. I.M. Schnoogle: What about your enemies? Bugs: All my friends are my enemies. I hate 'em because I have to leave 'em. I.M. Schnoogle: Yeah, that's the part I like best. You leaving.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

Do you remember you specifically told me to bring one paper clip? You said it only takes one sheet to make a difference. I said, 'Are you sure, Doc?' And you said, 'Bugs! Bugs! Bugs!' And then you sneezed on my carrot and then you said, 'Don't worry, it's just allergies.' Do you remember that?

Bugs Bunny to I.M. Schnoogle

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

I.M. Schnoogle: Everyday I tell you I hate that... Bugs: And everyday, I do it anyway.

[incorrectlooneytunesquotes]

Bugs: You've been lyin' to me. You got three to tell me the truth, 1... 2... 3... I.M. Schnoogle: YOU'RE THE LIAR! KEEP THE DOLLAR! YOU'RE FIRED!