#idk what your talking about it hasn't been a year your nuts

[problematicbastards]

“It's not used to being full, that's what. Gonna need to pace yourself you wanna keep that promise.” Leonard told him, handing over a couple more fries to pacify the kid into not thinking he was gonna take away his food. He didn't need him running off after all of this.

“Great, gonna need a shower though if you're gonna use it. Sure, my sister's got a shirt that won't be too big on you lying around somewhere.” The last thing he wanted was for the living room to start smelling like a dumpster.

problematicbastards​:

“That depends, you gonna give me an answer? And how is your stomach doin’ with all the fries?” He didn’t need to deal with a sick and puking kid one top of one who needed a shower and a change of clothes, so he didn’t want to fork over my fries without knowing how he was doing with the ones he already had gotten.

“I don’t need you barfin’ all over cause you got to over zealous with finally havin’ a proper meal.” Proper meal was a loose definition of what he was feeding him, but it was enough food to fill a small stomach so it counted.

He paused in his reaching, and looked up at Leonard with a curious face. “What’s wrong with my tummy?”

It felt a little strange, but he just figured that was because he was less hungry now than he was used to being. He had fries! And they were warm and soda, and he might even get a burger, too, if he was good.  “I won’t puke! I pinky promise.”

He nodded firmly. “I can sleep on a couch. I’m small, I won’t take up the whole thing.”

[golbrocklovely]

idk if you’ve talked about this, but what’s your psychological thoughts on sam and not committing to a person long term, how he treated katelyn, kat, him looking for answers in self help books, and the like? idc about him sleeping around solely, like get laid if u wanna, but he treats it like he’s found his life’s purpose and all questions have been answered and it’s weird to me…

i've talked about it in parts and whatnot, but i don't mind rehashing what i think lol

obviously yall, take this with a grain of salt. this is all very clearly speculation on my part so if you don't agree, don't listen. i'm not saying i'm right, i'm just saying what i think.

to me, it feels like sam has some form of peter pan syndrome/is terrified of getting older. that alone he has said himself more than once. he's even said that it's his biggest fear: getting older. and i think when it comes to marriage and kids and all of that, that to him is the sign of your youth being gone. done. dead. if you're married and have kids, your life cease to exist the way it did in your youth. and in a way, it's kind of good he thinks that. that means he holds those things in high regard and takes them seriously enough to know he can't fuck around if he has a wife and kid. however, the issue that arises is he strings ppl along.

like kat and katelyn. with kat, it was obvious to me for the last couple years of their relationship that he was not ready to take the next step (or didn't plan to marry her at all). not only bc he said it himself countless times over, but bc he didn't want to grow up yet. but the problem is he kept promising kat that he would eventually marry her. that they had been together this long, it was gonna amount to something. but i think when colby got sick, it scared him shitless and made him realize just how not ready he was to grow up. and so that mixed with realizing he wasn't ready for marriage and kat was, he let her go.

and this is a slightly bigger thing, but i truly think he's never thought about marrying someone before. and i don't mean he didn't want to marry kat at all - i think he was told so many times over "oh you have to marry her, you've been with her for X amount of time" and sam is such a follower and listener to those around him, he would have done it. he was gonna do it. but i don't think he's ever stopped to think if that's what he actually wants. bc i truly don't think he knows what he wants at all.

sam moved on too quickly after kat. and i think that's bc he doesn't want to be alone. i think him and katelyn were fine, but the constant hate and probably a fuckton of other shit we'll never know about caused that relationship to crash and burn quickly. he himself said that he hasn't been single fully since like 8th grade which is fucking nuts to hear. and look, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be in relationships. however, his problem is that he doesn't seem to grow in them. he stays stagnant. he doesn't change, mostly bc he doesn't date girls that challenge him or stand up to his buffoonery.

which also leads into my next point: the self help books. it seems to me that he doesn't know who he is as a person, which i'm pretty sure he's admitted to in one way or another. and bc of that, he's like a sponge to those around him that he respects. that's why he takes on the persona of these self help books or the random podcast he listened to last. everything applies to him for a bit, until he realizes it really didn't and then he moves onto the next one. he's lost. and look, it's not easy to find yourself. but i also think relying on others to tell you who you are doesn't help either. self reflection needs to happen on top of that.

also, not that you brought this up but i gotta add it in here, sam has alluded that growing up he was always questioning authority. literally told of a story of yelling at his principal, getting in his face (while the principal was getting in his) about the vines him and colby were filming. and also obviously doesn't seem to love cops or security guards, right? but then FOR SOME REASON treated every word that his father said like the bible so much so it caused him to not believe in an afterlife which has now lead him down a path that almost caused him to get his friend possessed all for a video……………

this man is an enigma. i'll tell you that.

as for the life's purpose shit, he (and colby) have been saying that shit since they were teens so imma just say that it's them/him trying to sound smarter than they are. and i don't mean that in a disrespectful way. i don't personally think there is a meaning to life. or at least one that applies to everyone. but i think when you think you found it, it makes you believe you're better than everyone around you. even if only slightly. and i think it also helps those that feel lost if they believe they know what they're doing when they really don't have a clue.

sam is a very odd individual who infuriates me constantly, but i do feel for him bc i get it. doesn't negate that he still pisses me off tho lol also i truly hope i'm wrong about him bc it seems stressful to be him sometimes.

[only-lonely-lovers]

08.18.2022

tags: masturbation, dubcon(?), caretaking, possessive language

notes: I think a lot of this one was us laying around in bed texting each other and it shows... w

Bird is あ / Avvy is つ

あ：Anyways I was thinking rly hard about… uhh… I liked a lot when Avvy proposed Amane having been incepted sexuality due to Yashiro so commencing jerkoffs and being distracted and this being a new thing. Tsukasa observing this like oh……. kawaii…. something new. It can't be sad that Amane is attempting to be secretive and hide stuff even though they do absolutely everything together. Thinking about them outright sharing a bedroom and 1 bed. kinda deal.

Somehow its novel and cute to Tsukasa that Amane would be shy about something with him. Since when, you know? Amane is a shy person but there's nothing he's actually embarrassed about around Tsukasa… is full autisms and can be as rude and wordless as possible, doesn't hide his interests. So any sense of Amane sequesting into the bathroom for periods of times or, when Tsukasa runs an errand and comes back he can hear Amane shuffling quickly in the bedroom. This just makes Tsukasa get good at coming home worldessly. Presses ear to door. Oh. the sounds of jerkoff. naruhodo

Does this ritualistically. It's kind of fun. New Amane sounds just dropped and all that.

つ：It would just be cute… not offensive or saddening at all.

あ：I think Tsukasa is perceptive enough to quickly deduce who and what is prompting this. And is perfectly calm and ready for Amane explaining Yashiro-san wants to visit. Hmm yes… let me meet her…

つ：amane having a new feeling that he is embarrassed offffff

あ：Ah the more i wrote… the more this was really just a perfect sunshine-amatsuka fusion… But that was kind of cozy feeling to get to imagine

つ：It seems like a nice cozy place to beeeee no challenges. Some spice as tsukasa knows magics and nene is some new Magic’s user And amane just a nerd between these

あ：This really is a tsukasa who goes to get groceries and is like 🎵🎶 about it monitors my boy with spells

つ：Give me the little list of nuts and bolts🔩 you need

あ：I think its so. sedates you puts you into bed. when you need it.

つ：An equivalent of koku joudai if amane is super stressed before a tourney it’s like❤️ sleep

あ：Yes. oh dont worry sweetie. i learnt it all for you

つ：I’ll sing that song you like so much (It is a spell)

あ：So… Yashiro does come over. And the vibes are weird. She is like all thotted up but has to have this emotion like ah… tsukasa-kun. (doesnt resent you BUT. idk how to think about the thing you did last year or w/e) but Tsukasa is just pleasant. I'm bringing you guys tea. its cool.

At some point leaves them alone for a bit and monitors via magic. Oh i look into my crystal ball yk whatever. And I think Amane is like… very shut down and overwhelmed by the, pheromones, and the way he hasn't been actually feeling better over time. He's really perplexed by wanting to spend time with Yashiro, the urge itself is enigmatic and conflicting with his skills. aversions. but here he is allowing it. But i was cumrotted so yk It's as extreme as being ROCK HARD when she is right next to you and talking to you and wordlessly staring at the space between your feet and deathgripping legs. Nene sees this and is like ',' [brain falls out head]

but this Nene having more confidence and sluttiness is funn i think her stupid braindead thirst (the way she is like. a girl can have multiple guys as a treat ❤ during the event) means she just tries to be like ah… Amane-kun

… how are you feeling… [touches his chest] is this-? Good… are you having… fun? Do you. Like this…?

つ：Poor Amane’s life was so easy before

あ：Hand lowers… she strokes over his belly.

But this makes. Amane have a panic attack and run into the bathroom and close the door harshly. fwmp. and Tsukasa is like kyaa. oh… Amane!!! the way you definitely do want this… but run away from it!! So interesting. [didnt intervene when he could] You deserve to be bothered a little i think. awwwwww….

Returns into the scene. Nene isnt like made of steel she IS. embarrassed. face hot. apologetic, sorry Amane-kun went… I think he… I…

つ：Nene is a human being!!

あ：but Tsukasa is like ahh daijoubu daijoubu its fine Nene-chan. Ohhh he gets like that. ^^ You stay here. one sec… Peeks in. heyyy my shawnster…

He is comically like. Shivering and hiding behind a toilet like a scared cat. Standing up though. boner visible. Tsukasa is like [closes eyes and inhales.]

(duhh my notes.. one sec. im gonna just look)

"Is something the matter, Amane?"

As always, it takes Amane time to deliberate and reply, but you're never frustrated with him. You relish in getting to watch his fretful eyes tilt downward, his nervous hands clasp and squirm. You couldn't fathom rushing him. You wait patiently. Amane holds his arms and and waits quietly – you rush into them, clutch him close, and close your eyes as he nuzzles your shoulder.

"… I… want… to have sex," Amane finally breathes. He clutches you tighter. "With… Yashiro-san."

"Ah, I see, I see. That's very new and interesting, Amane. I'm happy you told me." You nod in understanding, genuinely proud at Amane for finally being able to say it. "If you ask me, I think Nene-chan would be more than happy to."

"I don't want to be alone though. I want you there."

You take a deep, deep breath.

"Really…?"

"Mhm." his hair brushes your cheek as he nods.

It's been a while since you've felt so humbled to be included with something of Amane's. You were used to doing everything for him, with him, but you would have been understanding if he pursued this girl without you. But dear sweet Amane wanted you, even here. You sway, side to side, nuzzling against him. Amane's hips jitter as you do – oh! … still excited… You stroke his back.

"Of course, Amane. You tell me anything you want me to do. Where to be, where to touch… I can even move Nene-chan for you, get her ready… anything."

Kshfhd its all like. accepts everything very immediately sure i will get you to fuck her. ohhhh i get to be there? yes.

つ：Walks out the bathroom holding hands

あ：Both of you acting like space aliens admittedly. there's not really any sense of deliberating on… emotional closeness… Amane is just crystalizing that he wants this thing and Tsukasa is like , and so, it shall be

No proper anything… I'll get your dick wet sweetie…

つ：It’s like… does amane try to explain or tsukasa. It’s cute either way. Amane like. Yashiro-san. I’m sorry, I know it’s weird. So I get it if you don’t. Want to. Do anything. But. If we d. If we do. If we do anything I. I want. Tsu… kasa…. With…. Us…. or else. I’ll. Rrun away. Again and. Again

(Tsukasa wiggling fingers at nene and looking a little apologetic) Feeling on cloud 9 though

あ：I think as Amane speaks, he sometimes gets so shut down he actually just needs to dictate to Tsukasa what comes next. soo like… step 1 is actually walking out together and telling Tsukasa the living room area is scary and it needs to be in the bedroom. comfort space. and with like nearby stuffies or something excessive like that. pls… and so Tsukasa is like ohmm Nene-chan this way, let's talk more in the bedroom ^^ and she's like o. kay.

つ：Thats so like. Fear Ok The want for the dick I hope tsukasa doesn’t turn me inside out

あ：It's fear inducing. also you walk into their room and see its 1 bed. and this is definitely the 1 bedroom in this dorm actually. ok Like whatever

つ：Yashiro quietly says naruhodo

あ：But itd be cute if then Amane could be like im. do wanna. i do wanna. Do it

つ：Amane voice: but there’s something wrong with me

あ：I need help Tsukasa, really laying it on. I'm just here for moral support. Rubs his shoulders

つ：Yashiro: ah… I could… I mean if it’s just help I know what I’m — amane: nnnnnnnn (tugs tsukasa) Tsukasa: ^^ …my help is needed. Sorry, nene-chan. I won’t do anything if you don’t agree. (… unless amane asks me too lol❤️)

あ：Teehee

つ：Think of me as… a security blanket! That’s all!

Yashiro looking at two boys on the bed. Brain begins to melt Tsukasa like mmm… well… you’re already like this…. (Guides amane to lean back to show off tent more lol)

あ：It's a lot like. To submit to. But I think she'd genuinely feel too awkward to bow out in a way. As overwhelming as it is. Oh Amane-kun is so sweet. His… beseeching gaze. His. cock is right there also. To leave him so snubbed. When you do want it.

Tsukasa is intimidating but in a sultry way. like shahgdgdfhgI did imagine it being very much like. presents Unzips his pants. Releases from boxers

つ：He is clutching tsukasas arms like hiding behind one a lil Skrunky…. Let the scent waft to nene lol

Tsukasa also gets to be like. Eyes widen a little AH ITS STRONG LOL I’m always getting the after breeze left in the bedroom Oh the source is much more potent… HAS THE RESOLVE OF A DEMON TO NOT GO CRAZY

あ：The cute thing is Tsukasa himself experiencing stuff for first time gets vertigo for a second. OH keep it together

つ：Linger hands near him for longer than he intended… it’s so warm. Smiles at nene

(… I will hurt amane a little) Nene-chan… don’t you think it looks nice…..? Ah…. And this scent in the air~

Nene: 💭YOU CANT JUST SAY IT LIKE THAT

あ：Like heuugjvjfh!!!!

つ：WHAT THE FUCK!!!! Dhdududkdjdhdhdj

あ：Coughs Ah…….. s.. souuu….

つ：Amane like dndjdjd tsukasa—!!

あ：You need Tsukasa here to be like why don't you come closer… dont be shy Come see… it's nicer up close

つ：Despite all her bravado, is shy and slow up close It’d be different if she was alone…

But being watched… she’s suddenly aware amane is very delicate, isn’t he…

あ：Perhaps Tsukasa nerfs her in a way that puts her on Amane's level

つ：Always thought of him as a mundane amount of shy… but… … he’s actually very unusual…

あ：Forced to contemplate the boy

つ：Does he really need something like this….? Tsukasa-kun…. Do you. Uhm. Do you always… help .p. Ah

Like this? …. No…. This is both our first time seeing this, nene-chan

あ：A fun question for a girl to be made to ask herself.

… I was thinking about Tsukasa being as excessive though as. like pulling back foreskin to show off (edited)

つ：Mm a good time to pull it back …. And (TRYING NOT TO BREATHE HEAVILY) Amane’s first time feeling, (pulls….) this…. Nene shuddering. Jesus Lights popping in eyes

あ：Fweeeewww… its hot in here. the humidty is spiking. your pussy is on fire etc.

つ：Delicately places for fingers along shaft…. Nene does. Simply crosses over tsukasas to the head….

あ：Amane whimpers… It's genuinely a lot… I think he is not used to being touched by other people. let alone in this context. Your body is like a liiittle fearful of something unfamiliar. But girl hand… lovely to feel, atop it all. but it's so good it's alarming. (jitters.) I sorry. amane. but the Tsukasa commentary track is like oh he liked that. keep goinggg

つ：Fluster nene and amane both…. I imagine tsukasa is the icebreaker always chatting during

あ：Yeah i think its kind of an instinct keep a dialogue going to fill in space. he is used to little or no response.

つ：Girl’s hands are soft, aren’t they, amane? Hehe…. Gently leaves cock to pet his hair and rub his knuckles

あ：maybe ask Nene if its HER first time… (bc Amane would like that…!)

つ：She’d get so WHY PUT ME ON BLAST But just mentally Take a SECOND.

あ：He is GOING to put you on blast.

つ：Squinch brows… Wiggle mouth….

Think about how girls should maintain mystique… but… sees little amane all. Small and shy and. Urhgg

あ：Amane peers an eyeball at peeky

つ：Y. Yeah. It’s. My first time. With anyone. Doing anything. Like. This

あ：His.. eyes lid. shudders Tsukasa gets to be like hueheueu yayy he likie… Oh! … Amane likes that.

つ：Tsukasa kind of mentally like ah thank god nene if you had nonvirgin hands….! Knows what Amane wants and wishes for him to have it all

あ：That would be too sad. i would. maybe have to erase that from Amane's memories. 💔

つ：The real option In reality I will fix this if you fuck up I will never put my amane at risk….

あ：Nene this far into the experience does have to be thinking 💭 this doesnt quite feel like… he is JUST a security blanket

つ：She is ignoring feeling a nonzero amount about it For NOW

I think nene has the power to start jerking him off….

あ：Yus i did think she would pick up the ball. Tsukasa presents but Nene does not leave anyone hanging Genuine lust takes over. the boy is warmmmm and so boy.

つ：You get a nice rhythm going…. Tsukasa keeps his hands busy here and there

Fixes hair, flattens some wrinkles in shirt, does the usual preening to make amane feel it’s not so different Something new, and stuff familiar

Enables amane to get comfortable a bit… subconsciously can relax more… less tense ball and more… bumping into hand

あ：Make it as easy for him as possible, ease him into it. Doesn't have to be as tucked away. steals glances at Yashiro and what she is doing. Mhmhnhn…. it is… nice. It's better than. jerking off.

つ：Tugs at tsukasa and mutters at him shakily. Tsukasa stifles. Shuddering feeling the heat of his face so near and what he’s asking…. Which is just for him to please thank nene… Like tell her she’s doing good

あ：Yes your majesty hhhhh

つ：just shy like nnoooo she’s doing me a ffffavorr

Nene-Chan (WAS STARING AT COCK FORGOT TSUKASA WAS THERE FLINCHES) Amane wants to thank you…. it’s very nice, how you’re willing to help…. You really do want to do this, don’t you? It’s fun for you, isn’t it? Amane isn’t being selfish…. This is actually (can’t control voice getting heavy finally) very generous of him, right? To let you do this.

あ：Oh the room just feels like it keeps getting hotter

つ：Amane staring. Not what he asked you to say…

あ：Overwhelmed to hear Tsukasa implicate that, oh i think his little brain is like. noo. that's not what i saidjfhfhg… like gets caught up in a technicality. why would Tsukasa say something different though he is here to help me… [CANNOT. SPEAK THO.] But also why does this make my cock shudder a little

つ：Don’t you feel…. Lucky…?

Nene who has been broken a bit: h. HAI!!!! I AM— LUCKY!!! JERKS FAST

あ：aAAHHH!!

つ：AMANE-KUN HHHARDLY TALKS TO, ANYBODY!! SO… it’s!!! It IS ! Special!

Tsukasa watching. Ooouuuu Likes what he sees in you….

あ：This is where its fun. like. the noncon potential Just a touch actually Despite everything

つ：Yosh Ah…. Nene-Chan really understands❤️ Holds Amane more firmly….

あ：Amane genuinely so like, not ready for feeling this, gasps. F-fast!! ssscary. trying to inch away. but i think it just reads the same as his bumps into hand Tries to tug Tsukasa like a lifeline

つ：Touches forehead toooooo for a second Inhales your exhale quietly mmmm

あ：Sigh. the…. kind of choking sounds… made when the sensations get scary. lots of choking vocalizations like breaking off. mgh - gh -- hhgh- nhh

つ：So interesting….

あ：Cock is evil though it works against you. it does want to push up. i think sometimes cock wants shove, while hips and body want FLEE… you get these broken little jitters

つ：Tsukasa suddenly reaches forward and grabs nene’s shirt front. Drags her body forward

That’s not all you came here for And that’s not all amane needs you to do

Her hand lets go in the shock…. A nice momentum bounce of cock in the open air

あ：Nice cinematography.

Amane who doesnt know about anything beyond what is happening in this immediate moment. no idea where we're going. his brains are already melted out his ears… just continuously tugs Tsukasa’s sweater, waiting to be understood

つ：Just before Amane can whine for the lack of contact, or move, tsukasa swaddles cock in his free hand as if he’s coddling it Like keep it warm while they work this out

あ：Shushed

つ：I don’t think Amane’s first time should be finishing in your hand, don’t you agree? Don’t you want something more special? Of course you do! DRAGS ONTO HIS CHEST

He’s been finishing into his own hand so much, nene-Chan! Thinking about this!

Amane wants to “do it”. Of course! So badly.

あ：Dizzying to hear… disorienting, for both Amane and Nene. This way that Tsukasa can suddenly feel omnipotent You know everything…

つ：Yashiro very dizzy, yes… dumbly nodding and panting loudly… plants a palm on his chest Well, she was well prepared…. No panties

あ：A girl wants what she wants…

つ：As she gets a hand between her legs… tsukasa observes. holds Amane ready… A situation of nene lowering over while tsukasas hand gradually recedes

あ：It is all for this... Tsukasa assisting in the line up and all. Watching it happen...

つ：Enjoying each second… amane is dying. But I’d like it to be that warm PUSSY GOOD SHOVES

あ：Yess

つ：Activate sleeper cell

あ：Hehhe yes … actually part of the. cumrot was the thought that while deep into this Amane would actually become insatiable. like he has no self control!!!! cant!!!!!! its actually like oh god dont STOP ffffucks like a cylinder

つ：Yossshhh autistic grip SITS UPRIGHT Make Yashiro shriek

あ：Mmm delightfully scary. pivot

つ：Tsukasas propeller hat spins

あ：Shahshdhh. HELLO handsome the emotion Tsukasa experiences

つ：makes tsukasa very very excited childlike

あ：manic...

つ：AMANE HAHAHAH❤️ HUGSSSSSS SQUEEZES NUZZLES NUZZLES NUZZLES

あ：Amane amane amannnyyeeehh

つ：Yashiro processes that— not a tsukasa she has ever seen Giggling kicking around Really nuzzling into his hair….

あ：You're doing so good!! Amane!!!! breathless

つ：She’s being. Jostled sf hard. Bed is shaking

あ：Holding on for dear life. rghgjfh trapped in this crazy room it feels like

つ：Would love Amane to manage to pivot to pushing her backwards on the bed and hammering Brain is only composed of. AND IWANT HARDERR

あ：I wanted the sex Everyone was patient for me now im ready wanted to FUCK you i understand now

つ：Understand how fuck works It’s all too clear

It is the wacky shack as tsukasa is just like dhdudjdbdhdjdndjdj hehehehehehehehe Lehhlleheleehll I’ll make you guys dinner after thisdss

NENE-CHAN GOOD GIRL!! PETS HER TOO She’s drooling. Delirious can’t see

あ：Its like ah. the beautiful parallel in how Amane is like any other TL of Amane in that. he functionally is going to treat you the same, like, piece of meat, hes not SOCIAL he doesnt have manners.

つ：It’s just shy though. Not even polite really It’s disarming but says nothing of his selflessness

あ：nnnno. just shy. he's not. respectful I do think Tsukasa completes the energy by being so mmm yes yes yes ohhh look at him go its a faaaaaast car Love you baybbieeeee

つ：You feel the most degraded in a funny way Yashiro finally feeling like. This novelty. But she’s such a slut this AU she loves the sensation Come to this dorm to get manhandled by twins

あ：She is the pussy in the room Finally… what a girl has been seeking

つ：dragged over cock and instructed what to do. It’s her own awakening

Thought she was— a forward, sortof dominating type Idealistically imagined herself that way. But it’s not what she wants In her heart this is, perfect… shoved and pushed

あ：Even assuming her preference for Amane-kun came packaged with wanting to mess with a shy feeble boy yk

つ：Your crazy girl Schtick

あ：So endeared was she. but like. experiencing him rail her. makes her go oh. Its sfffff hot… if he is like this. about me

つ：If that’s what’s inside amane-kun….

あ：Amane-kun who can barely look up from his fiddling… his projects…

つ：Ah a nice situation of tsukasa and Yashiro calling his name in an easy back and forth Tsukasa kickstarts it being himself Yashiro follows the addictive lead

あ：Ahh kawaii kawaii… It seems like it feels good to do

つ：Amane scrambling about

あ：The incentive is feeling his cock respond inside her. fweee….

つ：Ahhhh the chorus

あ：it feels good to be a girl in a moment like this

つ：Epic feelings I think the nut moment is scary Like grabs so so hard Congeals in his virgin pea brain🧠IT CAN GO INSIDE

あ：I WANT IT i do think its a real jfc… amane… digs nails in… trying to hold you down so hard It must go in and stay in

つ：Gotta unload I think Tsukasa is beyond sane helping he’s like on his back arms wrapped around Amane somewhere flopped kicking around

あ：Ehehehee

つ：WOOOOO HES SO FREE AHHHHH OOOO

あ：Its cute. he is a fairly responsible composed boy in the grand scheme of things. made excited by Amane's own liberation uuouuuuu i love you

Amane is so cool!!! Amane is sooo capable… Amane is soo special!

つ：Amane does everything amaasziiiinnggfgly

あ：[pants] Amane should get everything he wants

つ：All this and then once he finishes it’s like. WHEEZE and tsukasa has to be like— AHHH RUNS OUT OF BED TRIPS FALLS ON FACE GETS YOU GETS INHALER

あ：kdfjhfdh my boy fuck whens the last time he drank water

つ：puts it in Amane’s mouth RUNS GETS WATER!!! Yashiro is blearily watching laid out

あ：Yashiro witnissing this. in a delirium like….❔

つ：You want like a kinda fussy Amane here honestly Like mmmmmn… squints

あ：lmaoo yes… like .. ugh.. TOO HOT … rips sweater off makes pissy sounds

つ：tsukasa helping When it gets stuck

あ：Throws it on the ground

つ：Fully removes Amane’s belt Knowing he disprefers it but wanted to look nice for this date Yashiro is still watching. What am I seeing

あ：What the…

つ：Amane, I can start a bath…. You got pretty sweaty, right?

あ：Grunts Its unflattering like ugh yeah

つ：I’ll go start it. Bows to nene. Leaves room She’s like wtf am I…. Seeing…. I do not understand the dynamic here actually

あ：I want Nene to spend like 24 hrs rly having bits and pieces load in for her You thought you understood but its like. [remembers this thing and this other detail and ???]

gonna later be like. wait. tsukasa being all…. we're lucky… and… amane should have whatever he wants… what I thought Amane was just a lonely boy but. IDK anymore do lonely people get dinner made for them ? Tsukasa has put on rice immediately

So funny for Amane to be so into routine and being taken care of he doesnt. offer yashiro much. at the end of this. like i need my bath… shuffles off

You know is like. Thank you I liked it

つ：Ah it’s funny. Yeah.

あ：Rubs mouth.

つ：She’s like. I did. T-too. You— you were impressive.

あ：Really [shuff shuff…]

つ：I didn’t think it’d … be like that

あ：shrugs

つ：Tsukasa though I do think would… like to usher her out Im sorry my boy has a timer

あ：Sorry darling

つ：He needs his routines again…. very cordial

あ：Baby simply needs his juice

つ：Nene-Chan❤️ Thank you for being so understanding. You’re a brave girl! That was so fun. Amane really surprised us, didn’t he…? He’s…. Incredible.

(Amane in the bg tugging his socks off) Like nyeh….

あ：Foosi

つ：Nhguh

あ：stupid socks…

つ：Can’t get these jeans off fast enough

あ：That water better be ready for me

つ：The shitty afterglow Fsr true for amane

あ：Smells self. ugh Too much smells

つ：Kind of an annoyed voice… tsukasaaa…. It’s like whip cracks in brain WELL! ILL CALL YOU SOON NENE-CHAN, OKAY? I’ll get your number from Amane!

あ：Until then. Bye bye

つ：We’ll talk soon, ok? Byeeeeeeee

あ：nene like. will we i guess we will.

つ：Amane has literally never answered his phone for her

あ：He doesnt do that.

つ：It’s an emergencies thing really Nene walking home feeling many things. Much to think about. Feeling good though.

あ：Well. it was weird. but it wasnt bad.

つ：So strange.

あ：Ummm its complicated. Aha.

つ：…. What on earth will tsukasa and amane do now H-he said he never did that to him before….

あ：Is their relationship going to… change…? …. did it… change… did i see it change?

Somehow its truly more challenging than if Tsukasa has always been jerking off Amane. why now

つ：I do like to think it’ll be normal up until Amane gets a boner again in the night and his brain is like. Wait Bodies

あ：I can get

つ：Can be used for goods and services

あ：I can make Yes… i did. imagine a follow up. which is later like tugs. wordlessly. drags your face down

tsukasa part 2. oh…… are you sure….. … this is funnily enough perhaps the 1 amane that would be like. theres no reason to not ask Tsukasa. as the guy who already takes care of every single one of my needs

Cannot resist the simplicity of Tsukasa taking care of a chubby in the middle of the night sorta deal dont. wanna jerkoff anymore. is the thing. it doesnt feel as good. and rly didnt like having to evade Tsukasa for a sense of privacy. … but now there's no reason to…

As always I think there's just a different vibe. To Amane wordlessly grabbing Tsukasa’s face and rubbing cock over cheeks, pushing against lips. mnnn… dont have to overthink it… shoves… and Tsukasa is just like despite everything humbled , bc again, not assuming it actually has anything to do w him and already geared to think it was just a matter of being useful as an assistant

つ：Pleasaaaant… a silent graciousness

I also like humping tsukasa in the day… and tsukasa like aaaaa dials nene while this is happening Nene-chaaaaaaaan how about another date? Amane misses you….

あ：kawaii. yeah humping could become such a thing… very easy to do the feeling is like. ouhhmmm… im his binkie rn. he is becoming, incessant ❤ fun. but like. HELP! lol.

つ：Tsukasa for this is like mmm I wonder how long this will go on…. Will he get burnt out on it? Satiated? Okay and accepting if after a week he calms down with him…

But I think it just gets. Worse The more often it can just be like ughhhgh Puts hand on

あ：Not even needing to say anything

つ：COMES back from ROBOT SHOW throws BACKPACK on the ground grumbling STOMPs autistically to bedroom Drops pants

あ：counting the seconds. until you Its like mmghfh… suddenly too autistic for my autisms. like the tourneys ar elike. fucking annoyinggg gbdhfhf

つ：Being so like emotional tho at the show like. I miss tsukasa so much…. I wish he was here and not busy at his schooling… it’s so much easier with him

It’s so hard… (comes home and behaves uhgratefully despite this) The weight of the backpack and the journey home eroded him

あ：Get less grateful by the second. as you approach the door i WANT MY SLAW.

つ：I have to calm DOWN!!!

あ：opens the front door. moans. Tsukasaaaaa (edited) drops my shit kicks off my shoes

つ：Skitters. Another result of this situation is this tsukasa losing grace and returning to some regression

あ：Youre really shaking his pea around in there really bring out the. amane amane!!!! mode

つ：Slides into room

あ：The seamlessness of fullbody hugs and wraps legs around. and then gets leaned onto a surface

つ：Aoaaooooho

あ：Indeed it does just get. worse. for a while i think its a real. like. legs and spine getting fucked up. situation losing hours

つ：Ah novel to see. Tsukasa truly losing his grace in this AU

あ：kawaii...

つ：Nene is like. It’s a little like. …. Living with amane seems like. …. I’m not ready Yet For that

あ：It seems. a bit dangerous chotto abunai yo…

つ：But I will be… some day

あ：Its like a prospective future

つ：Dating is what it is, for now

あ：but. intimidating. I. if he would really fuck me. all day . ah You know its like. becomes collected at the thought. BUT…. FOR NOW. WAITS.

つ：One loves to have a future to dream about Tsukasa walks into a door

あ：I think he has 0 graces fingering like it is. a lobotomizes you situation

つ：These fine motor skills

あ：Like jesus its actually more brutal if he fingers Lances you

つ：It will be much worse. Give nene my multiple day long stabbing pain that nothing can make you forget or ignore

あ：Serious business

つ：I think she’s a bit more of a pansy than me though No offense nene

あ：She's cute like that It's a lot to ask of a normal girl

つ：It’s good to make a girl suffer, too

あ：Yes Truly suffering for this boy

つ：The extreme masochism is for Tsukasa

あ：Souls are divided in this way

つ：But Nene can appreciate it like a loyal gf of an abusive boyfriend The Pride

あ：It's like a medal she gets to display on the wall of her mind later I really will. Let Amane. Do things to me. heep. but i love the thought of like. willfully deciding you must let tsukasa bear the burdens im normal i am trying to study

つ：Some of that energy. Must be burnt off

あ：The girl talk is as stimulating as ever under these conditions Its fun though i like to think Nene has to be a little bit like. drools. hearing about Amane needing an hour long blowjob

つ：I think this situation cumrots nene I think it’s going to get heinous

There will come a day Nene is laying in bed and she finally congeals TWINCEST IS HOT!!!! OKAY!!! FINE I CANT IGNORE IT FOREVER DO THEY WANT ME TO FIND ITHOT?

but I think the final form is tsukasa noticing and it’s surprise part 2 like awe What first amane likes me here…. Now nene thinks I am a sexy element?

あ：What the h*ck… Even a frog in a well like me…

つ：

Wants to watch ME blow amane…. But it’s inviting the devil into your house he’s going to send you videos out of nowhere or something

あ：you think to yourself that you're nothing special woof That is a problem

つ：Catch on to nene’s fetishistic interest and be like titling them deranged things like ❤️do you think I’m a good little brother?

あ：LOOKS AROUND LIKE THE POLICE WILL FIND HER

If nene understands she kickstarted Amane's sexuality then this would feel like such a corruption like her sick desires lead them all heor What did I bring out in these BOYS…

つ：Did I ruin a pair of siblings

あ：They were just normal…. er… well… sort of normal siblings before. They werent fucking all week at least. jesus

i kind of both like the thought of Tsukasa covertly filming but also clearly prompting Amane to hold camera suddenly in the middle of something

つ：He’s got Hims spells fuckin invisible floating camera dgaf But it s also funny to just do it some time despite this capability to utterly hide it

あ：Yes doing both. www. just cuz its fun to see Amane's reaction I think hes like umgh…. ……… but i do want it Frustrated and feeling owned

つ：Adjusts the camera like a nerd

あ：Oh fiddling. fussing about angles.

つ：Really enjoys watching through camera

あ：but its moe. like something Amane does that Tsukasa wouldn't think to or account for is reach down and even direct Tsukasa's face this way and that… entranced.. Slows pace…

つ：Get weirder about touching cock on

あ：I think you can rly get a sense for how used to handling Tsukasa he is, like… the sheer ease of reaching and pulling, directing with harsh or more delicate touch. Tugs hair. pulls at skin around corner of eyes to make you look

The element where Amane definitely. isnt thinking abt this being sent to anyone I think it makes him look like an absolute madman

つ：Moving like alien The free spirited in his natural habitat I think eventually tsukasa can do weird shit alone with Amane like subject him to some spell but only after he’s so. Spoiled and cumbrained that he gives in to some temptation

あ：Liberated at last..

Tsukasa is willing to fux with Amane a BIT as it is. but i think something earnest for his own enjoyment with Just Amane takes a higher power level Thats so directed and not wanton for the lulz yk

つ：A lot of being cum slave for a month

あ：Has been comed on and in for so long its like.

つ：It would have to be studying some stuff time and reading a spell and lingering for a long time

あ：Hair messier, clothes all fucked up. twiddles my wand in my hand. a treat for me. maybe

つ：But ah with failsafes in place… I just like the idea of manually stripping away the inhibitions with a spell to parse the raw most urge

But it should just be getting insanely violent And rambling like a maniac

あ：Functionally makes like that botion that Hakubo gives to Aoi

つ：The autism ruins Amane for talking much at all but override the stoppers…. Nyaaa. A temporary version of that But you just get a very ah. YOU BELONG TO ME!!!!

あ：your body my property. ohhh it pours out… The entitled heart…

How unfathomably special, at the center of this all. Quiet little Amane, doted on and tended to. Feeling, not just, gratitude, but a sense of divine entitlement. Reference your history… YOU'VE BEEN MINE FROM THE START

つ：Expoooose the entitlement!!! That he is obligated….

あ：I'm going to make sure you never leave me

Oh sigh… i think for Amane there's almost so many feelings and thoughts unsaid it leaps out of him messily, daisy-chained thoughts

I'm, I'm tired of going places alone I can't do it. I WONT anymore Why should I?? Why do you let me Tsukasa!!

つ：LOOKING DEVASTATED I— I won’t! Then! I’ll — can go everywhere with you…. Feeling out of breath to hear and seeeeee

あ：In a straddled sort of pose… Amane could bear weight heavily, hands on sternum

Eugghh but it could b so insane… grabbing something to use as makeshift rope… tying Tsukasa's arms. or forming a noose around neck

つ：SCREAAA

あ：Scary

つ：ah at some point it has to be like FREEZES TIME SHUDDERS AND WAILS ON THE FLOOR FOR A MINUTE

Ok. Time to reverse the effects I’ve learned What I wanted to

あ：I. asked for it

つ：I just wanted to know if Amane… really wanted me… here With everything changing…. if he’d run out the door or… Whatever he wanted… I just wished to know Whatever came out…! Whether it was simple or complex or about me or not

あ：A sense of obligation almost you know…? Enough time passed and you wanted to know what Amane was thinking… about any of this

admittedly Tsukasa would be like. Nevermind. if nene doesnt think she is ready for something. i need to know if Amane is coping with… not having something

Could I be doing more for you… But then its like. a. i. suppose. the answer was yes

つ：Was failing my boy Tsukasa simply wants to please him… To the utmost

あ：I arrange your tater tots in a little galaxy just to make you happy

つ：As his pleasures have been escalating… but have somewhat platuead… needed to know if force was needed It’s so like so help me I would subject nene to any spell

あ：if roachie could really ask you what you wanted there's no Tsukasa ready to be so specifically wanted… its like… how… why… It came out so… unlike anything ever before

つ：Demanding more… wanting no separation I will make it so…. kisses head of frozen in place amane

あ：This has to be such a. sleeps you. cleans up. puts you to bed is somber pets my guy

つ：Contemplates steps patiently

[morrigan-sims]

get to know me tag

I was tagged by @fivesims. Thank you, Polybius!! <3

going under the cut, because this is really long and I talk way too much.

show your wallpaper and the last song you listened to.

my desktop background is actually just this edit. The last song I listened to was "You'd Be Paranoid Too (If Everyone Was Out To Get You)" by Waterparks.

currently reading?

Archenemies by Marissa Meyer for the 2nd or 3rd time. I ran out of books I hadn't read yet, so I'm rereading some of my 230-ish books.

last movie?

Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves. I really liked it!!

last show?

Critical Role Campaign 1. I watched an episode for the first time in over a month on Monday, and I'm so glad I did. I missed my emotional support dumbasses. /lh

craving?

uhhh... good italian food. My favorite restaurant in the world is back in my uni town, and I miss it dearly.

what are you wearing right now?

blue tie-dye-looking sweatpants and critical role merch t-shirt that my sister got me for christmas. specifically the Mollymauk one.

how tall are you?

5'10" and very happy about it.

piercings?

None, and I don't plan on getting any. I could not be trusted to take very good care of them.

tattoos?

None, but I'm trying to work up the courage to get one someday. Specifically a sword wrapped in rose vines on my left forearm.

glasses or contacts?

Neither.

last thing you ate?

a really disappointing mini doughnut, followed by honey nut cheerios.

favorite color?

black, red, and royal blue

current obsession?

idk. I'm kind of between super intense hyperfixations recently. But my most recent ones have been Divinity: Original Sin, ts4, and Critical Role.

any pets?

Two cats, 4-year old bonded brothers named Loki and Charlie.

favorite fictional character?

Don't you dare make me choose just one!! But I'm gonna say Vax from CR1, Caleb, Molly, and Beau (and Essek) from CR2, Kaz Brekker and Inej Ghafa from Six of Crows, Nikolai Lantsov from any of the Grishaverse books, Sherlock Holmes (basically any version, but the original ACD stories are my faves), Percy Jackson + Anabeth Chase.

last place you traveled?

Brookfield, Illinois to see the Brookfield Zoo. It was great, and I have some lovely pictures.

I'll tag @salemssimblr @literalite @apricote @stinkrascal @wildmelon @wavvi @simelune @void-critters and anyone who wants to do this but hasn't been tagged!

[wayslidecool]

top 10 best spongebob episodes?

okay, so i'll come forward and say i probably can't give you a top 10. i haven't been caught up with the show for a few years now, and it's been a long while since i've seen most of the episodes, even the ones i do enjoy. so instead what i'm gonna do is give more of a generalized "i remember these episodes being pretty damn good". will probably go out of my way to highlight more niche picks. so uh, these aren't my top 10, just ten episodes i like that i felt like talking about.

all this is under the cut because i don't wanna flood peoples' dashboards talking about Sponge Bob lmao

so first thing first, let's get some of the obvious picks out of the way: i think pretty much everyone knows that pizza delivery (s1, ep 5a), band geeks (s2, ep 35b), graveyard shift (s2, ep 36a), krusty krab training video (s3, ep 50b), and chocolate with nuts (s3, ep 52a) are some of the series' best. probably others i'm missing but like. everyone loves those episodes, countless people have talked about why they're great, i don't think there's much i could say that hasn't been said by other people and said better.

so let's highlight some others that i personally found really good that i probably can say more about!

tea at the treedome (s1, ep 1c)

man, talk about coming out swinging. this episode is part of the very first block and i think it is so, so strong. i think what makes this episode work so well for me is how they handle spongebob, how he so badly doesn't want to disturb his new friend that he becomes completely passive and can't even ask for water is so good, feels very relatable. i love the way this episode handles his internal monologue, showing his increasing desperation up until he inevitably snaps. ("I NEED IT!") it's so so good, such a good showcase of his character.

patrick's also great here! he hits such that nice balance of "well-intentioned stupidity" that defines all his best appearances. the way he sees spongebob slowly breaking down and tries to remind him to stay classy ("when in doubt, pinky out!"), eventually coming in himself to show spongebob things aren't so bad and immediately being proven wrong, it's all just so good.

my only real knock against this one is that for sandy's debut episode, i feel like she doesn't really get to do a lot. which is definitely a pity, but i dunno, i don't wanna hold it against this episode too much because they definitely give her some great episodes later on, and this episode otherwise nails the character writing.

sb-129 (s1, ep 14a)

this is a really high-concept episode to put in the show's first season, don't you think? honestly i think this is an episode worth checking out for the spectacle more than anything. don't get me wrong there's some killer jokes, the joke about everything being chrome in the future, the way squidward inadvertently ends up inventing jellyfishing, there's some good stuff, but let's face it. the real reason you come to this episode is for its sheer scale. idk about you, but i can sort of give or take "caveman humor".

but man, this is an episode that goes places. i mean, in eleven minutes, we get a snippet of the future, the past, and the nowhere dimension (the last of which i'll go over a bit later on). on one hand, it kinda feels like the episode has to rush through them all, but on the other hand, it doesn't feel like any of these time periods are meant to be all that fleshed out. they mostly exist to provide an interesting setpiece, deliver a few jokes, and then move the story to the next place. i could see an alternate longer version of this episode feeling like it drags on a bit too much.

and man, that nowhere dimension. i love that scene so, so much. it's surreal, it's memorable, it's a bit unnerving, and it adds so much to this already high-concept episode. that scene's probably the highlight of the whole thing to me (and MIGHT be what elevates it to a personal favorite) but i'd definitely say the whole thing is worth your time.

dying for pie (s2, ep 24a)

i think this is another of those episodes everyone can sorta agree is one of the best, but eh. i wanted to talk about it anyway because yeah it's just that good. i think spongebob and squidward are probably the best character duo in the entire show, and this is probably the best example of said dynamic. i really like how the plot is set in motion by squidward's carelessness, how his apathy is what forces him to realize how much he actually cares about his neighbor. what i love even more is the balancing act they play with the spongebob-squidward dynamic, the way they're still able to keep spongebob a bit annoying to squidward while still letting squidward genuinely care.

besides all the character stuff, man is this episode just funny. the absurdity of the pirates selling pies that are actually bombs, spongebob's sweater of tears, "Eleven times?!", spongebob's bucket list including showing squidward to everyone wearing a salmon suit and open heart surgery? yeah this episode has a lot of heart (hehe!) but never is it at the expense of the episode's comedy.

the only thing i could maybe see someone holding against this episode is that spongebob having not eaten the pie is kind of an ass pull but like. the writers aren't gonna kill off the main character, come on. and besides, i think the twist ultimately serves the episode well, i think getting that scene of squidward expressing his exasperation over everything he had to go through really reminds us why we love this dynamic: no matter how much squidward secretly cares about spongebob, spongebob's always gonna be a little bit annoying to him. d'awwwww.

squid on strike (s2, ep 40a)

speaking of good spongebob/squidward episodes! this one is so, so underrated i think. it's not really one of the show's most quotable episodes, but at the same time, i kinda think that works in its favor, if that makes any sense. jokes aren't as good if you know they're coming, so an episode filled to the brim with really good jokes that aren't especially quotable ends up hitting just as hard on rewatches. it might not have the same staying power as something like band geeks or chocolate with nuts, but because of that it manages to always surprise you with just how funny it is.

and to make it clear: this episode is hilarious. mr. krabs trying to charge his employees for things like "existing" and "breathing", spongebob's idea of getting more from his job just being getting to wear a comically oversized hat, the general cluelessness of both spongebob and the population, spongebob taking squidward's anticapitalist metaphors a bit too literally, there's a lot of good material here. probably also helps that this is the episode where squidward says "Nobody gives a care about the fate of labor as long as they can get their instant gratification." so true bestie.

i think what buoys this episode beyond just its great jokes is once again how it nails the characters. spongebob loves his job, sure, but the only thing he loves even more is his good friend squidward, so of course spongebob will become more passionate about the strike when mr. krabs insults squidward! so much so, that he's willing to dismantle the establishment, board by board! and conversely, the one thing that could make squidward give in is the idea that he might be on strike with spongebob forever. as i've said. spongebob and squidward are the best dynamic on this show.

nasty patty (s3, ep 44a)

this is probably the darkest episode of the entire series, and i love it SO much for that. like, i wouldn't say it's unreasonably dark, they make it apparent from the very first line of the episode that the health inspector doesn't actually die, but we are still looking at an episode of a children's cartoon where the main characters are thoroughly convinced they've murdered an innocent bystander and spend the whole episode trying to cover it up. and it's hilarious.

i think the juxtaposition of such a storyline with a character as innocent as spongebob is what really elevates this episode for me. ("The dark deed you requested is done, sir.") the whole episode ends up becoming this exercise in just how long they can keep up the central joke before the characters inevitably find out what's going on, especially with the multiple fake-outs! i love how there's multiple instances where the health inspector briefly regains consciousness, only to be immediately knocked out again. so good.

and as a result of that structure, it manages to escalate so well, with how they bring in the police and manage to keep coming up with situations where they have to keep the not-so-dead body just barely out of view. the scene where spongebob stuffs the health inspector in his hat (pictured above) is probably the highlight of the episode to me, it just so perfectly illustrates how silly this story manages to get.

fear of a krabby patty (s4, ep 61a)

so most people agree that the series went downhill after the first three seasons. and they'd be right! the first three seasons are absolutely the show at its peak and the show never managed to recapture its glory days in the seasons that followed. but it's not like they flipped some switch and the show was suddenly bad. hell, if anything, "fear of a krabby patty" (the very first episode after the movie!) might be one of my all-time favorites. in fact, and this statement may sound treasonous, but i think i like this one more than their other 24-hour adventure in "graveyard shift". yeah, i said it! bite me!

of course, the krusty krab being open for 24 hours with spongebob and squidward being forced to work the full shift is about all this episode has in common with that one, as the stories go in pretty wildly different directions from there. i love the way plankton is integrated into this episode. his "dr. peter lankton" schtick is so funny in how obvious his intentions are, leading to some killer therapy jokes and a couple instances of being crushed by a piano.

another highlight of this episode is its distinctive animation style! c.h. greenblatt has a very recognizable art style, you can usually easily tell which episodes he boarded (like dying for pie up above!) but you can especially tell with this one. actually, between its loose, expressive animation and its zippier pacing compared to the classic seasons, this almost feels like sort of like a post-sequel episode? i wonder if this episode would be all that different if they made it in season 11. i don't mean this in a bad way, for the record -- i think this episode manages those traits really well.

mermaid man & barnacle boy vi: the motion picture (s4, ep 67b)

i don't really have much to say here i just think this one's funny as hell. it's not like it thrives off these intricate character dynamics, or this elaborate well-plotted story, its plot is just a vehicle for a flurry of ridiculous jokes that all end up hitting for me. you know that thing where you see some bad movie and are like, "i could do better than that!" despite having no filmmaking experience? that's the central conceit of this episode, and it works to hilarious effect.

this episode may not thrive off of intricate character dynamics sure, but i still think it uses its characters very well. it does a good job finding everyone's role in making the movie, from spongebob as director, squidward as the makeup artiste, sandy as the pyrotechnician ("Did somebody say BOOM?!"), plankton as the boom operator ("Did somebody say BOOM?!") and of course, pearl as the boatmobile. it does such a good job putting every character in a position where they have extremely high, extremely unearned confidence.

and that's really just where this episode succeeds! it's not complicated, you throw dynamic characters in a ridiculous situation and mine the comedy gold. helps that this episode has some killer running gags.

boating buddies (s6, ep 109a)

yeah, let's throw a controversial pick on here, why the hell not. so to make things abundantly clear: i do not in the slightest think this is one of the best spongebob episodes ever written. i also totally get why most people hate this one, and i don't think it's unjustified! that being said, when i was watching through season 6, i found this one of the funniest episodes of that season, and after thinking it through a bit, i think i understand why.

i'm not gonna try and dance around the argument that this episode ramps up spongebob's creepiness to absurd levels, or that it's unreasonably cruel to squidward, because it does and it is! HOWEVER. a lot of those criticisms seem to be under the assumption that, like most episodes, we're supposed to root against squidward and for spongebob. and like, that is clearly not the case here. this is very much an episode told from squidward's point of view. squidward doesn't like spongebob, so this episode will show us spongebob's worst side. squidward can't catch a break, because we've all had those days, right? this is an episode that puts the audience in squidward's shoes, and shows us why he's the way he is.

and i dunno, i think when you watch the episode under that pretense, it ends up working! or, at least it does for me. again, i can totally get why someone wouldn't like that characterization even if they understand the perspective this episode is written from. but to me, it ends up making gags like spongebob being able to hear squidward breathing from his house, or the drawn-out blackboard gag set to an orchestral score work that much better. throw in a frenetic boating scene towards the end with that surreal laboratory sequence for a bit of extra energy, and ultimately it ends up being an episode i enjoy. it's definitely not gonna be for everyone, i wouldn't necessarily highly recommend this one, but if you're gonna watch it, at least try to do so with the writers' intentions in mind.

planet of the jellyfish (s8, ep 169b)

you know, for as long as the show's been on the air, it doesn't feel like you really get those big, outside-the-box episodes all that often. spongebob is a show with a comfortable status quo, rarely deviating from its usual character dynamics, locations, and stock stories, so when we get something like this "invasion of the body snatchers" pastiche, it ends up standing out a lot more among its peers.

i think they made a good decision with this episode to keep spongebob oblivious about what's going on just long enough to mine that for its comedic potential, and no longer. if you had that eat away at much more of the episode, i think it could've dragged, but we get the best material of spongebob's obliviousness (like his awkward conversation with the jelly squidward, or seeing the jellien attempting to bite him and assuming it just wants popcorn), and after that the story lets spongebob find out, lets the story move on, and start building the suspense

i think that the monster movie pastiche does a good job giving this episode a unique flavor, it ends up feeling a bit higher stakes than a lot of spongebob episode, while also using this opportunity to riff on the genre and make a lot of silly and offbeat jokes, like the jellies kidnapping spongebob's spatula for some reason, spongebob freaking out about all his friends being kidnapped... and some random incidental, all the jelly clones hissing at a dude for ordering a patty with mayo (which turns out to be their weakness!), it feels like it does a good job making the most of its genre parody.

krabby patty creature feature (s11, ep 222a)

oh hey, another b-movie monster movie pastiche. look, i'm not gonna beat around the bush. i'm a sucker for these things, okay? in general, season 11 is probably one of my favorite seasons of the later part of the show's run, i think it generally does a good job feeling fresh with a mix of new character pairings, offbeat story concepts, and a handful of genre pastiches. like this one! truth be told there's absolutely other S11 episodes i could've picked that'd give this list more variety (squid noir would probably be my next choice, consider that an honorable mention) but listen. monster movie episodes are fun, okay?

compared to planet of the jellyfish, i think creature feature is generally a bit more frantic, really thriving from the sense of urgency the story concept provides. less suspense, more action! unlike the previous episode, this episode puts spongebob at the center of the action right from the start, letting him see the situation unfold and ultimately become the one tasked with stopping it. perhaps you miss out on some of the jokes about spongebob's naivety, but the increased tension more than makes up for it. plus we can now use that time to show how the mayhem is effecting people around town, get gags where bubble bass complains about the cheap promotional stunt, or a cop complaining about the zombie apocalypse interrupting his break. good stuff!

this is another episode where i think i have to give a shout out to the animation. i know some people complain about the recent seasons being overanimated, which is a complaint i definitely feel for some episodes, but i think this episode uses its really expressive, really fluid animation to great effect, really selling us on spongebob's terror with these big expressions. i also gotta shoutout some of the character designs for the patty monster versions of the characters, you can tell the animators working on this episode had to have a blast with it, and i feel like the end result really pays off.

and... that's it for the episodes i feel like talking about right now! is this the Cream of the Crop? probably not, but they're all episodes i've enjoyed, and it's nice getting to sit back, elaborate why i like these episodes so much (even if it's been pretty time-consuming LMAO). thanks for asking!

[whumpsday]

I give captivity Kane a copy of Interview With The Vampire (which idk if that book even COULD exist in that universe but let's pretend it does), and I tell him he has one day to read it. When I come back, I want him to tell me all about the book, every detail I ask I want parroted back. If he cannot do this, he will be punished. If he can, he may have the next day free of pain. There's layers to this. 1- He is so weak by starvation that there's no way his brain has the energy to read an entire book, let alone remember huge parts of it. The anxiety of trying to finish and remember combined with the exhaustion he's fighting will drive him nuts. 2- there's so much talk of hunger and blood lust and drinking your fill of blood and all of that, I know it'll be torture to read for him, having to read over and over lines of people like him getting to feed and the graphic descriptions of blood. If he somehow does this, I tell him he gets no pain, just as I promised. This is a total lie, I just wanted a day off myself so let him torture himself with reading and then get right back to hurting him. If he does not do this, well then nothing's changed except he had an extra type of torment for a little while.

Maybe when I take the book back, I wait until I'm out of grabbing distance and 'accidentally' get a little paper cut. The frantic begging would be fun to listen to whilst I prepare the silver shackles.

yeah that book def doesn't exist in this world but i'm glad you're having fun with it :)

Kane does finish the book in one day, though it takes him considerably longer than it would have when he was free. He's not trying to memorize, he knows this is a hopeless task. He hasn't been given a single thing to entertain himself with in years and just relishes the chance to engage in a little escapism. The talk of blood-drinking does aggravate his predicament, but it too functions as escapism. He imagines himself in the character's shoes, finally able to sate the terrible hunger.

Overall, he had a pleasant experience up until your return. He recounts what he remembered, resigned to the fact that he will be punished. When you give yourself a papercut, Kane leaps at the bars on instinct, recoiling back and screaming in pain when the silver instantly burns him.

[luv4fandoms]

Laying Claim (Castiel x Witch!Reader)

@ladyofhellhounds

So with that in mind, this is what my brain came up with, idk why XD, I hope you like it 😊

(Also guys, my mom and I finally got to the Godstiel part of Spn I've heard so much about, and pretty much our reaction was the same, just "oh sweety, no, what are you doing?)

Word count: 2,476

Pairings: Castiel x Reader

Warnings: Cussing, Demons being asshole, unknown claiming? Fluffly Cas, Angry Cas

Today's the day! The anniversary of when you first joined the Winchesters and their guardian angel one year ago. You had met when a coven in your town had started killing people, you were going to find out for yourself but...Well after all, if they wanted to do the dirty work of searching, why not let them?

Though you still did some digging of your own after you found a hex bag in your gutter, silly little girls, just a bunch of soccer moms who thought Harry Potter was real. Needless to say the demon they had sold their souls to at their little slumber party wasn't the type to give them back, and with a little help from one of your spells, the pieces fell right into place for the Winchesters to slay the demon...

Only problem was the bitch knew about you, and used her last breath to spill the beans, so you really weren't surprised when the trio came barging up to your house. The two boys seemed to want nothing more than your head on a platter as well, thinking you were linked to the coven, but the third, the third simply stared at you, seemingly trying to decipher you as well as commit you to memory. It wasn't hard to know what he was, the gift of sight as your grandmother called it, allowed you to see the large black wigs that rose behind him.

'Interesting' you had thought, remembering everything you had ever read about angels.

"Tell you what" you spoke, stopping the argument the boys were having.

"Have your little friend here read my mind, or memories, which ever he prefers, and see that I have never harmed anyone" the boys looked to the angel who seemed to have broken out of the trance he was under at the sound of your voice.

"Cas?" The shorter man asked, to which 'Cas' simply nodded and made his way over to you, he lifted his fingers, placing two on your forehead while closing his eyes, a moment later he opened them and nodded at the boys.

"She's telling the truth, she hasn't hurt anyone, she actually helps people, and was a target of the coven herself" he told them.

"See? I told you, now, would you care to join me for some tea?" You asked, eyes never leaving his blue ones, oh you could get lost in those babies.

"I even have pie" you added with a smile as you finally turned to the other two.

 That had been the first time you had a civil conversation with the trio; Sam and Dean, two orphan hunters following in Daddy's footsteps. And Castiel, the angel who decided to fight his own kind to protect humanity, interesting. You offered your services should the boys ever need it, figuring they would never take you up on it, but hoping to be able to see the stoic angel once more, and low and behold...

They called. For almost a year now you had been helping them, being a researcher, going with them on cases, even using your magic to take down baddies. The work made your feel alive, but not as alive as when Cas would come around. Something about the angel's presence alone makes your body feel electrified, and when his piercing blue orbs met yours you swore your heart stopped. Lately though, he started treating you like a child who was incapable of keeping herself safe.

The first time was while you were helping the boys with some demons, a reason for Cas to be present, and you hadn't thought much past trying to slow down your heart rate when he grabbed you and pulled you to his chest, shielding your eyes as he let out a blinding light that killed them all.

The second time though, you had been against a neat of vamps, one which you and the boys were handling just find, but just as you were about to drop the vamp that was advancing towards you, a silver blade pierced it's neck, quickly taking it's head, and when it fell it revealed Cas standing behind it. He stated that he needed to speak with Dean and Sam about something, so that is why he located you all, but you began to wonder when you were the first one he healed, and he stood extra close to you as he spoke.

The third time you started to grow annoyed. You were just fine by yourself, could handle yourself against the werewolf, and in your opinion, kicking ass. Sure you had taken a few scratches, and your arm hurt like hell from the deep claw marks, but you held your ground...And then right as you were about to give the killing blow with your magic, that all too familiar angel blade made an appearance once more.

"What the hell Cas that was my kill!" You told him, less angry about the fact that he finished the fight and more about the fact that he had done it so often recently. 

"You're injured" he simply stated.

"So? I was still kicking its ass!" You defended as he walked over to you and healed you, causing you to groan and walk away from the confused angel.

The final straw had been tonight, the whole day throughout the hunt for a pack of demons who had intel on Lucifer, the boys and you had been in a somewhat good mood after you had bought them breakfast and explained the anniversary. The hunt had gone well, you found the demons, killed all but one and was grilling it for information. It was a tough nut to crack, even an exorcism didn't scare it. 

"We're not getting anywhere, let me try" you told them, causing Dean to immediately shake his head.

"Hell no, I'm not letting you near that thing alone"

"Funny, you say that like you can stop me" you stated while looking over at him, there was a silent stare before you sighed

"Just five minutes Dean, I promise you I'll be fine" before Dean could even open his mouth Sam spoke in your defence

"She's right Dean, and besides, he's in the trap, what can he do?" 

Dean was silent for a moment before his eyes met yours again.

"Fine, but five minutes is all you got" nodding, you made your way back into the room. 

"Ok buddy, here's how it's gonna go down" you started as you stood in front of him, but he only laughed while looking around.

"Boy toys now coming?" He asked

"Sorry pal, just you and me, now you're gonna-"

"You know I'm surprised your mate leaves you alone with them, he must trust you a lot, or he's an idiot"

"What the hell are you even talking about?" You asked, confused as to why he would state you have a "mate"

"Oh….Oh you don't know" he started laughing hysterically.

"Shut it!" You yelled watching as his laughter died down, but the smirk stayed.

"Sweety, you reek of him. His sent his all over you. Desperate protectiveness, longing, it's enough to make me gag, the best part is that he did this without you even knowing. A do not touch sign to anyone else, a claim on you, really that's horrible, and I'm a demon" he laughed again, while you digest the information, something had laid a claim on you? You felt like you needed a shower thinking that it could be any of the creatures you encountered in your year with the boys. 

"You know though, I'm not surprised you didn't know" it stated, causing you to look at it once more.

"You're such an idiot" and with that he lunged at you, knocking you back into the wall and knocking the air from your lungs. You were pretty sure you heard your shoulder pop while your vision blacked out for a moment. When you looked around you noticed the slow steady drip of water from a nearby pipe that had washed away part of the devil's trap, before your eyes were brought back to the demon's face as he straddled you, leaning in and taking a deep breath.

"I wonder how he would like it...If I laid my own claim to you" he smirked, and you tried to push him off as he leaned down, him somehow over powering your magic, but just as he was about to reach your neck, his weight disappeared from you and a crash was heard from the other side of the room. 

"W-wait I-I didn't know!" It started to plead as you watched Castiel slowly walk towards him.

"I didn't know she belonged to an angel I swear!" He pleaded again.

'Belonged to…' your mind started to remember little things that happened these past couple of months. Cas giving you his coat when you stood outside watching the boys do a salt and burn, Cas sitting next to your while you explained your favorite shows to him, by the end of the night you would be leaning against him and his arm would be on the back of the couch, fingers lightly resting on your shoulder. Cas listening to your music with you from your ipod in the back of the impala despite the fact he could easily poof to the location. And then there was Cas always swooping in when you were fighting things...did Cas...Lay claim to you?

You watched as he easily got the information and killed the demon, only then noticing that the boys had been pounding on the door trying to get in, upon the demon's death, it unlocked and they rushed into the room. 

"Y/N!" Dean started but Cas was quick to cut him off.

"Why were you not with her?" His voice rising slightly, the only indication besides the fire still burning in his eyes that he was pissed.

"We figured she" Sam started, but was also cut off by Cas.

"That she what? Was your bait to get information? You put her in danger!" A light blew out in the room.

"And we told her" Dean tried

"And you know she would not listen! You should have been in her presence at all times!" Another light, the bright flash momentarily illuminating the shadow of Cas's wings, oh, he was very pissed.

"Cas" you started

"This is exactly why I have to keep-"

"CAS!" You yelled, turning the room silent as you stood, grabbing your arm that you could clearly tell was broken.

"I came here alone of my own accord, they didn't want me to, but I did it anyways, it's not their fault"

"They should have protected you" he started, coming forward to heal your wounds, his eyes showed a different story, and in that moment you knew what he was really trying to say.

'I should have protected you'

"We need to talk by the way" you stated, looking at the boys then him.

"Alone" with a nod he grabbed your hand.

"I'll take her back to the hotel" he told the boys, and in a blink, you stood in your hotel room. You let go of his hand, making your way over to the bed and sat down, Cas didn't move as he stared at the carpet.

"Cas did you…."you started before realizing that this was going to be really embarrassing to ask.

"Did you ...Lay claim to me?" you asked, not meeting his gaze when you saw him look at you from the corner of your eye.

"...Not...Fully" he spoke after a moment, this caused you to look at him.

"What does that even mean?" You gave a short laughed and watched as he sighed before coming to sit next to you. 

"Y/N I...I have feeling for you...Ones that someone would only have in the presence of a potential mate" he states turning to look at you.

"Wow sweety we gotta get you into now days language" you said with a chuckle, before adding.

"So..You have feelings for me?"

"Yes, I thought it was wise to push them away at first, you would be in danger if anyone after me, found you. But as time went on I found them...Harder to repress, and I found myself claiming you before I even realized it" He states, looking down as if weighted by shame.

"We have different versions of claiming"you laugh, thinking back to what the demon had said

"He said I smelled like you" Cas nodded, still not meeting your eyes.

"It's the first stage of claiming someone, we cover them in our scent, it's not perceivable to your senses, but to other beings it lets them know that you belong to someone" he explained, "So every time you sat next to me or gave me your coat?" He nodded, before adding.

"My grace also leaves behind a scent" he added.

"Your grace? Do you...Use it often?" You asked.

"To protect you yes" He nodded

"So this was why you have been jumping in front of monsters for me?" You asked, again he nodded.

"You know I can take care of myself" you smiled

"But it's my job to protect you" he stated, finally meeting your gaze.

"Because you're my mate?" You asked with a laugh, but noticed his cheeks darken at your words.

"I'm not your mate…"

"Yet" You smirked when he looked at you with wide eyes.

"I have feelings for you that someone would only have in the presence of a potential mate" you smiled, watching as he scanned your eyes for any sign that you were untruthful.

"But I can still take care of myself" to laughed.

"But It's my-"

"Job to protect me, tell you what, if it's your job to protect me, than it's my job to protect you" you told him as you leaned in, watching his confused expression as you pressed your lips against his, they were just as soft as you always imagined they would be, and your hand came up to cup his face, his stubble lightly scratching your palm as you felt his hand rest against your hip. You pulled away and looked into his eyes, the striking blue swallowed by black pupils. 

"As your mate" you smiled, watching as a smile spread across his lips.

"So...if putting your scent on me is the first stage...what are the other stages of..Laying claim to a mate?" You asked with a smirk, watching as his smile turned playful.

"There are a lot of stages, it could take all night" he replied.

"Well, guess we better get started" you spoke before pulling him down for another kiss, you were in for a long, blissful night with your new mate. Happy anniversary to you.

Hope everyone enjoyed it! Let me know what you think.

[celestialjupe]

Girlblogging: 2/9/23 01:44

Today was a major slay....fr. I hung out with alllll of my girlies for the first time in a while. Although Janice, Quyen, and i see each other pretty often, I have a friend named maregret that i haven't seen in almost 4 years now. She's very introverted, but she decided to come out with us today and it was the most heartwarming, beautiful thing. I've missed her a lot, and she opened up to us about some things and it was really eye opening to hear about what shes been going through. It was really cool, because it felt like as soon as she actually came out, she was talkative and happy to be there, so i really hope to see more of her because it really has been way too long and i missed her so much.

Janice picked me up, we went to Quiktrip for gas and coffee. I got a vanilla cappuccino and it was actually so good i was kind of surprised. Like, i knew it was gonna be good but it blew my expectations out of the water. We headed over to quyens house, where her and maregret were waiting. We all got in quyen's car and it was immediately so fun and comfortable. Quyen actually gifted me a tarot deck and a sanrio mystery box (i got a kuromi!!). Super sweet and the deck she got me is so beautiful and the cards are holographic. I gifted janice and quyen some homemade zines, and maregret some little candles. Maregrets gift was a little last minute because i didnt know she was coming until the day before but she was still really into it so i love that.

We went to this sushi place, and shared gyoza, and this other appetizer that i honestly dont remember the name of,, but it was like a crispy rice topped with this fishy stuff (Idk kjkdz), avocado and jalapeno. I got a salmon roll, which was super fresh and delish, usually i go for yellowtail but i didn't see it on the menu. Either way, very very good.

From there, we went to thrift city and i got some pretty cool finds! A white/red/black plaid mini skirt, black cardigan, purple/black striped sweater, gray pants, and a silver chunky bracelet with emerald gems. After the thrift we went to an ice cream place and i got this concrete with nuts and waffle cone pieces. Delish!

Afterwards we dropped maregret off, we went to quyens house so i could wait for my uber. Quyen was actually an angel and gifted me some clothes that she hasn't been wearing. when i tell you these clothes are ADORABLE.... they are to die for fr. Super grateful and it was such a sweet thing to do.

The uber home was actually super chill. The driver was really quiet and had a good playlist which i appreciated. Don't get me wrong, friendly, talkative uber drivers are always cool but i was kind of ready to just chill so that was nice.

But yeah hehe that was my day, super nice, loved it v much. It's crazy because just the other day i was thinking of just blocking the world out and isolating myself for a bit, but today changed my mind and got me out of my head which i think I've been needing. February has been kind of hard emotionally, nothing bad is happening im just in a bit of a negative spot with my mental health but it's nothing a good day like today couldn't fix.

Thank you for reading if you did! Please stay hydrated, keep your belly full, and focus on the things you love!!

[smolfeudallord]

Hey, I could use some spirit lifting like you reblogged... My girlfriend of more than 2.5 yrs broke up with me without giving a real reason... she said she hasn't been happy anymore the last month, but never once talked about it to me. She sent me "I love you so much" half an hour before breaking up with me and the evening before, she told me she'd never leave me. I thought she was my true love, we were engaged. My heart is shattered, and I feel so hurt, lied to and everything hurts... -sad anon

okay tbh in terms of life experience i barely have 16 years so if you can take anything from this at all jus know it's coming from a teenagerim really sorry that happened to you it sounds like it was completely unexpected for her to do that. it's okay that you're sad rn and idk what would make you feel better other than doing things that YOU like to do and jus exploring your new life w/o her as much as it hurts and finding out who you are NOW. if it makes you feel better i'll tell u a few embarrassing stories:-my family deadass convinced me michael jackson was my uncle until i was like 10 years old-i tried to impress a girl once by jumping over a wall (dont ask) and i ended up tripping and landing in front of the gym doors where someone opened it and i got hit again-my only time ever playing soccer when i was 6 involved a game where a boy sat on me and farted -my sister took me to the store w her and her friends at 3 am for some reason and when some weird ass reggae came on she deadass stopped at the stop sign, turned it up, and they all got out and started dancing in the street-the ex-bestfriend asked out the girl i liked when we were still friends and he basically used me to get to her but God is Real bc apparently he has a smol dick and nuts really early-she glo'd down too-i spent 16 years of my life thinking brazil was a smol country-my friend went around school telling ppl to touch her areola's bc she thought it was part of her ear and i didnt correct her until the end of the dayim so sorry anon