#idk. it's been easy and fun to write
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izzy-b-hands · 2 months ago
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...i have one of Jack Jr modern AU fics almost set to publish. Literally just need the title and then to preview (bc the spacing is Always Fucked Up the first time lmao) That said, I am. Paranoid that I'm not tagging enough/correctly/should have the rating set higher has set in, and I am putting out a call (v okay if not interested tho!) to anyone willing to give this fic a read to help me make sure I've not fucked that up?
Per Ellipsus it comes it at about 22 minutes to read, so not too horrendously long for a one shot (my definition of a one shot at least, I know it isn't proper fandom one shot length lol)
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egophiliac · 3 months ago
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I loved your drawing(and I love your style in general) with Leia in your recent post! If/when you have time can we see more of her in your style? I get so happy whenever I actually see people mention/talk about her and she’s not just forgotten because we didn’t get to see much of her. 😭
thank you! 💙💙💙 Leia/Leah/Lea/whatever is fascinating to me. she is the ultimate unknown. what was she like? how involved (or even aware of any details of the invasion) was she? Silver's basically a physical carbon copy of his biodad, so what did he get from her? like, I understand why the two of them kind of have to stay as these super vague and mysterious figures -- the whole point of them is that their story ended 400+ years ago and they're not really relevant anymore (and. well. the more that gets explained about them, the less that can just kinda be handwaved as "oh the politics were Very Messy") (we can sit here and theorize all day but let us acknowledge that, ultimately, canon gave us almost nothing about them post-Meleanor and we'd just be making things up). I do still wonder about her though! RIP Lea, we never knew you and we probably never will.
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actually you know what, as long as we're here, I think I WILL go ahead and just make some stuff up about what Silver might've inherited from her instead.
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#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 13 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 13 spoilers#there may be answers somewhere that i just forgot about so uhhh if so#whoops ( ᐛ )#having one of those art days where chances are good i'm just gonna wake up and throw this post out the window so be warned#but yeah idk. i've talked before about the parallels between silver and dawnatello and how i see him as basically bad end silver#he chose the easy option that let him stay loyal and fulfill the obligation he felt to his adoptive family#he knew it wasn't right and that he was being manipulated but he went along with it anyway until it was too late#i think he ultimately had a good heart but my man folded under the slightest bit of social pressure like a wet mcmuffin#so while i'm continuing to make things up out of whole cloth i wanna say that by contrast#lea never had a chance to do shit but if she had i like to think she would've had a spine like galvanized steel#like just personally i don't think she knew much about what the silver owls were actually doing#seriously does henrik seem like the kind of person who would tell her shit about anything#i think he basically took advantage of their dad's failing health to go off and be a warmonger#and if he thought about lea at all it was to be like :) you stay here and do boring domestic princess stuff#while i tell your husband to Do It For Her#i mean this is 100% me writing baseless fanfic here#i just think it'd be fun if the part of silver that was IMMEDIATELY like 'actually no. we aren't doing this.' might've come from her#she just never got a chance to show it#(it didn't seem to come from the knight is all i'm saying)#lilia might've given silver a billion complexes but at least he raised him to do the right thing#man someone left a reply or reblog on an older post and i cannot find it so i apologize for the lack of credit BUT they pointed out#that one of the big differences between silver and the knight is that the knight's family did not really seem to like him very much and lik#yeah i think so. lea might've been the exception there for him.#rip ma'am we'll never know if you deserved better or not
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your-unfriendlyghost · 2 months ago
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Mark & Bryon
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The worst brothers ever :))
Plus a post book Mark, w/ the dyed hair I’ve drawn him with in the Dally & Tex AU and the Angela AU
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iwoulddieforienzo · 11 months ago
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Something really great about the persona 2 cast is that they all individually fucking SUCK to talk to casually. Every single one of them. They are all infuriating. We have:
Tatsuya, who will stare at you blankly if you try to initiate conversation (IS) and will dip without saying a word afterward (EP)
Batsuya, who will scoff and brush you off/otherwise act dismissive
Eikichi, who might honestly be the best to talk to in the IS crew and that is not saying much, who WILL talk extremely loudly over you (probably not on purpose?) and will not be paying particularly close attention to the conversation beyond whatever he wants to say (gets points for talking about his gf. gets points taken away for constantly talking about his gf)
Lisa, who will automatically assume bad faith and will be rude to you the entire conversation unless you manage to defuse her temper (good luck)
Jun, who is uncommunicative at BEST and requires an encyclopedic knowledge of flowers, metaphor and body language just to get a HINT on what he’s thinking, and who will be extremely polite but completely unhelpful. If you tried asking him what he wants for dinner I guarantee it will be the longest 30 minutes of your life as he goes “oh I have no opinion :) whatever you want. :))” EXCEPT HE DOES HAVE OPINIONS. He has SO MANY OPINIONS. He is Expecting you to be able to pick up on his “obvious” clues. He will be passive aggressive if you don’t. (Jun babygirl you suck so bad I love u)
Maya, who is a delight but will very quickly become grating if you try to talk to her about anything serious as she hits you with the white suburban mom's "how to live a happy, healthy life" lifecoach slogans. You can’t even mention, like, stepping in a puddle or something without her hitting you with the positivity beam.
Yukino is great actually. 10/10. She’s fabulous we love her. Incredible conversationalist, chill and fun and easy to get along with. But she’s from Persona One, she doesn’t Count.
Ulala, who WILL bring up her relationship problems in every conversation within 10 minutes at least once. Any longer and she will start talking about Maya.
Do I even need to explain Baofu. Have you seen him.
And finally, Katsuya, who is a cop and a kiss ass and Very Obvious about these things. Also he can't talk to women. He can barely talk to men. Help Him.
And yet they all work wonderfully as a group. They are so annoying I love them
#long post#Nanjo and Elly don't count btw#hi I fucking adore them#I missed them <3 Suou Brothers crawling back into my brain#Persona 3-5 have a very charming casts that are easy to like immediately. Persona 1 & 2 are filled with the most annoying bitches alive#exaggeration obviously. not by that much tho#persona 2s cast in particular is very charming. when they're TOGETHER. Individually? Wellllll...#hmm something about p2s cast in particular feels less. gimmicky? I guess? than the newer persona games#which isn't to say that those casts are worse or that the p2 cast ISN'T gimmicky because they are#but idk. you kind of always know how Ryuji or Ken or Yukiko will react to a situation. but the p2 cast may surprise you#again: doesn't make any of the later casts bad! I absolutely adore them. That you can predict them is evidence of strong character writing!#The p2 cast just feels a little more fleshed out is all. probably because the lack of social links means they're able to progress#throughout the story and change without worrying about conflicting with a link yanno?#I love social links though I think they're a great edition!#They need their kinks ironed out a bit but Yosuke has already proved that they are absolutely capable of working hand in hand with the#development of characters in the story as well#and theyre still fun even when they don't impact the story. I like getting to know side#characters too! (Naoki and Ei and Ai and Daisuke and Kou and the old lady and Akinari and-)#tag ramble#persona 2#tatsuya suou#eikichi mishina#lisa silverman#jun kurosu#maya amano#yukino mayuzumi#ulala serizawa#baofu#katsuya suou#Also um. hi. Its been a while lol
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ki1ldeer · 2 months ago
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Going for a painterly thing… it’s kinda fun idk
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necrotic-nephilim · 9 months ago
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i love your fics and the ideas you describe for the ask games. i'm especially fond of your takes on the rarer pairings and i always smile when i see your posts in the ship tags <3
and don't stress too much about not posting anything, real life is important and participating in fandom should be fun, not something you have to force yourself to do. god knows fandom burnout is real, especially if you feel like people are expecting something from you. just keep doing what makes you happy :)
ghgfhgjhkjhjhg this was so sweet, thank you so much! i *love* talking about rarer rarepairs, especially if it gets other people to ship them too. the popular ships are fun and all, but i truly love spreading rarepair propaganda.
that's very reassuring, thank you <3 i've loved everything i posted here so far and have not felt pushed to post anything i haven't enjoyed, but sometimes i forget i can like. use this blog for whatever i want and not *just* headcanons/fics/mets/etc lol. and i also forget i don't have to rush myself. it's annoying to want to write and either not have time or not have the words work. i used to run a fandom blog in my teens that got very large and felt like a chore and i was so stressed about the need to perform and the numbers and all of that. like if a fic didn't do well i saw it as a personal failing and forced myself to write popular headcanons just for the numbers game. was not fun or sustainable in the long run and i think it contributed to me no longer having any taste for the ship i primarily wrote for. so for too long i treated existing in fandom like a job lol. i've mostly gotten it through to myself that this is a space for me, but i occasionally forget when i'm so caught up in all the things i want to get to for this blog. my to-write list is a mile long and i need to be bonked with a paper towel roll, i think. so it's very kind of you to say this bc the reminder is nice <3
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torchickentacos · 5 months ago
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Ah, yes, Nelly Furtado's hit song Anteater. In completely unrelated news, several people have told me that I might be slightly dyslexic.
#shitpost hours but also this one's lowkey serious😭#I'm mostly bad with acronyms and double-letters but sometimes regular-ass words trip me up. like maneater apparently.#I can read and write just fine but stuff gets inexplicably mixed up here and there.#The bane of my existence is NDA and DNI though. they're not even that similar. idk.#actually homophones aren't- by jove! I've summoned an ant. there is an ant on my desk.#anyways homophones aren't fun either. I write things as I hear them in my mind and sometimes my brain chooses the wrong one.#I know the difference between them! It's not a lack of understanding. I know my its/it's and to/too/twos etc.#but when I try to get them down on paper something just goes wrong and I end up with the wrong one. and I KNOW it's wrong. alas.#even with super easy ones like flour and flower. obviously I know the difference but there's just a disconnect when I go to write it.#it's never been impactful enough for me to actually get it checked out but it is annoying.#if anything it impairs my ability or total lack thereof to do math over linguistic stuff but that's a whole other thing.#the ONLY way math makes sense to me is the way you'd put it into excel. i can put in horizontal stuff with brackets#but I could never do vertical math like they teach you in school.#even with a calculator. I cannot go downwards with it. my brain just doesn't compute it.#it's like reading other phonetically-similar languages as an english-only speaker.#you can recognize each individual letter (read: number) but putting them together doesn't get you very far.#you might even be able to pick out specific parts but you don't know the grammatical structures behind it.#that's how math has always felt to me.
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quilleth · 4 months ago
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Over half the things I've started for whump fic prompt fills actually end up being fluffy. I think I am incapable of true whump xD like in the same way people ask if you'd like some coffee with that sugar or whatever when they see you adding a lot of sugar/ milk/ creamer/ whatever (hot cocoa mix in my case) kind of whump: comfort ratio. Light on whump, heavy on the comfort and fluff lol
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nosleeppotions · 1 year ago
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He gazes out of the window, through the smoke and falling snow at the city down below. The doctors moving around the infirmaries and medical posts, the engineers hard at work researching in the workshops, the workers wiping sweat from their faces after a hard day's work and stopping by the cookhouse to grab a warm(ish) meal, the children playing and running down the wooden streets.
For a moment he appreciates all the hard work and planning that had gone into this. Then his tired gaze travels to the guard posts, once regular citizens now armed and in uniform to keep order. He's promptly reminded of those Londoners, he can't help the expression of disdain. Much had to be reorganized after the fools decided returning to the frozen hellscape was a better idea than simply waiting out the storm, no, for them the fall of Winterhome (a ruined city only the scouts had seen and no one else) was a sign of impending doom.
In hindsight, there might've been better ways to deal with the situation, but he was more than happy when they finally exiled themselves and stopped disrupting everyone else. If they wanted to die returning to London? So be it.
He sighs, looking at the Generator, the heart of their city. They've come so far from a few mere tents and scavenging for coal to feed the generator for warmth.
And yet... as he looks up at the cloud covered sky (when was the last time he'd seen the sun fully?) he can't help but feel an ever present exhaustion. They survived the great storm. They have food and resources in abundance and deaths were now almost none existent.
He sinks into his chair (he made it himself), rubbing his face. His hair had gone grey and he feels ancient. He's not even the oldest in the city. Many of them looked older than they were nowadays.
They have adapted, survived. But how long... until survival was no longer enough? He's not sure he's ready for the day where the people make even more grand demands of him.
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keeps-ache · 1 year ago
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i need to walk into a field and just sit for for a while.. maybe forever hbfsh...
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unproduciblesmackdown · 1 year ago
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billions is really on one constantly like you gotta love how there's the wordless presentation of This Man & This Woman as like an image of epic power couple &/or pr for the Wholesomeness of this man to have the Family Values in having a wife & possibly even kids, and being fictional media, most of the time this comes up as Staged Material from actors for this Media, especially given that generally both parties will be preexisting Roles With Dialogue. and then when it comes to winston & their granting us their clearest most elevated least questioning/critical exercises in "this is Telling you that winston is inferior" in a) successful violation &/or b) successful-violation-born information that they recognize as Inferior & expect you will too....really a moment's pause sometimes remembering that since they couldn't be bothered to stage anything for winston & instead we got a) photos provided from will roland of himself from his real life or b) pics they didn't need to get rights to, in this case they show us selfies from a real-life-and-by-then-married-couple, and it's This that gets "well so of course this is another Recognition Of Inferiority presentation" and not "well isn't that nice, epic, &/or wholesome, or even just matter of fact" like. really unbelievable of them and steph wessels gets to cameo as someone who Of Course dumped this guy because [well just look at him we're right back to exactly 4 seasons prior in 3x03 where we're supposed to know winston isn't epic b/c if wags is there you're supposed to be projecting on him, thanks, & when the one thing you can take issue with being an apparently accidental misgendering, there's Nothing to take issue with in that in the face of this it's crickets from wags who's otherwise dying to kill winston already. awesome. but i mean. well just look at him. we Hate winston.] like and billions is off the rails like "b/c he's so bad at sex" like yeah i think nothing says Good At Sex like the nexus of "has never tried learning anything about sex" & "has never been told their sexual partners might benefit from their learning about sex" Hell yeah. but only those born with the good bodies (winston wasn't! btw! which we all Knew 500 thinking emojis) deserve to have sex and this is also an extremely epic thing to say in this zero critical lens Celebration of killing the autistic guy for not sufficiently staying an exploited object kept silently shut away in your possession but out of sight & mind.
literally unironically Extremely Normal of them where "normal" is expected to be synonymous with a [neutral to good] context, as it "normally" is lol, but we Do have a critical lens out here. just like amazing you brought his real life then even all the more recent marriage into things held up for us as more fodder for Why We All Hate Winston & Want To Kill Him which also always hinged on "well just look at him" which necessarily hinges on a real life person's form to be looked at (or heard, given that we know people don't always react to his speaking voice as "neutral" and this is just another aspect of people's bodies) while meanwhile it's like yeah delightful stuff actually. or who cares b/c the Context doesn't have to be "does this role seem personally appealing?" for the Question that doesn't need to be "do we want them dead or are they someone who can do whatever they want or someone who has to forever endure and support the previous and can do whatever they want that doesn't conflict with this" and then 500 zillion words to say about this actor who was only supposed to be Quant Kid 2 Who We All Hated & Killed for one scene in one ep getting a recurring role (to still only ever be hated & killed as far as the writing was concerned, for the overwhelming Mostly) b/c of this je ne sais quoi & of course still Acting as though this role is as much a person as any of the other roles, wow, can't believe this was found to be so Talented & Delightful & Essential despite still only seeing the role as [guy we hate & kill] & having no intention of like giving him an arc ever but we really want more of this. and then inevitably be really preoccupied about his dick like not in a "haha. pwned them in turn b/c that's gay" but like of course in being Superior it's like yep preoccupied with the inferior parties' sexuality & your own being superior too. his dick is bad and he's not tall enough and well just look at him, no wonder he was dumped [shows you an image from actually having good times with his eventual wife] like obviously. billions with their autistic character like how do we step it up from the episode where some guy yells the r word at him amidst like the threats and harassment and assault? well more of that plus surveillance and even more personal intrusion but also someone says he's effectively a child and then we enjoy validation of our eugenicist presumptions i guess about his sexuality and body and most like random details of personality (never stop pointing out that somehow that He Likes Puns is more evidence for how Objectively Hated he is) and this episode has no other point than revelling in all of this and considering this to also be like "yes this all makes wags look Epic, which is worth an episode ever, all the more so as 1/12th of a series finale season"
#just another billions post of the ''well now i've typed it so sure; Post'' genre#a gazillion words that can be said & resaid about this series or even like this 3x03 / 7x03 bookend & i've been & keep saying them#winston billions#so many things in 7x03 are so like completely empty b/c the Point of the episode is wags is so epic#with the framework & ''bonus'' that we're also watching winston be killed & we're all loving it so much#so like i don't really think about them b/c again like everything's so hollow in that regard. one layer here & it's worthless thanks#and that there's ones Accidentally more fun or interesting to recall. extremely easy setup for ''what if this actually had consequences#and that in itself also had relevance to the supposed Themes of this series & season in particular?''#but also stuff like i assume when we see rolled outta bed winston in underwear with more mussed than usual hair#we were expected to be like ugh loser gross? however obviously that ruled.#anyways like i Don't particularly go back over things like ''remember the selfie w/steph b/c This Loser Gets Dumped''#also b/c like if i Do think about it more like obviously i can't think of anything good or fun abt this fictional relationship#and billions forced us to faceclaim steph wessels for that? like ya gotta be kidding#the whole thing is unbelievable lmfao like that they ramped it up sooo much w/such less room for like it's not even plausible deniability#b/c i don't think they conceive of there being anything to deny. b/c That You All Agree is truly assumed#like billions you can't write produce & air this. but then they did#idk why they have winston cameo again? to reassure us he's not a loose end who might hack them b/c why wouldn't he?#reassure us he's banished & unrewarded? i don't even know. it's funny he can't be shown seeing / speaking to anyone He knows#b/c that'd be a Consequence for them & billions doesn't care. emphasis on that they do not care#really impossible to extrapolate their logic at any time such as Then b/c there's such disinterest#like i'm interested in the character and consider him a person as much as the other characters so a deep fundamental incompatibility
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sunnysduet · 2 years ago
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bpd is so stupid what do you mean someone said smth in a tone that i interpreted as harsh and now my entire night is ruined and i want to die. practice chill maybe
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trashytracktales · 2 months ago
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hey gurlll first thing first id like to say that im IN LOVE with ur fics. not to be dramatic but im seriously on my knees whenever u post bcs how do u write them so GOODD😭😭😭😭 so i have a request hehe🤭 u can totally ignore this. no pressure!
if u would consider this, hear me out. lando and reader are childhood best friends. they are like two peas in a pot but something made them fought (nothing specific, u can write anything!) that had them not talking for almost 6 months which never happens. since they have the same circle of friends, they got invited to a vacation in portugal. the tension between them is like WOW. then one night, when everyone was already asleep, they had another argument maybe make it like an angry confession that leads them to ANGSTY HOT LONGING YEARNING MINDBLOWING SEX but turns out it was one sided where reader kinda disappeared the next morning lol idk u can imagine the rest. OK THANKS LOVE YA💋
Not quite us | LN⁴
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🛥 summary ──── A cold winter fight shatters their friendship, but it’s the heat of the Portuguese sun that brings them back together, months later.
🛥 pairing ──── Lando Norris x fem best friend!reader
🛥 rating ──── explicit
🛥 warnings ──── 18+, mature/sexual content, descriptive language, mentions of drinking, angst and emotional tension, arguments, swearing, jealousy, smut, unprotected sex, manhandling, passive-aggressive behavior, pining, emotional miscommunication, past relationship dynamics.
🛥 word count ──── 8.6k
🛥 date ──── Apr. 23, 2025
🛥 a/n ──── Wrote this one straight off the vibes, just went with the flow and let the request guide me here and there. Sometimes the chaos cooks itself, so I hope you guys enjoy it either way ♥︎
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IT’S NEW YEAR’S, and Lando would have a lot more fun if he stopped looking across the room every twenty seconds. But he can’t help himself. If someone looked at him right now, it would be so easy to read it in his body language: he is exasperated, beyond frustrated, and maybe a little drunk. His fingers encircle his glass so tightly that his knuckles have turned white, and his jaw clenches every time he sees the way she flinches when her boyfriend talks back to her.
Suddenly, the music gets too loud, the champagne is too warm, and even if he’s trying his damn hardest to pretend otherwise, his night is completely ruined.
She’s sitting on the edge of a sectional couch with her phone clutched in one hand, refusing to look up at her man, her face carefully blank in a way that screams something is wrong. All it takes is a blink of an eye and he walks towards the exit, visibly annoyed, leaving her behind.
Lando frowns while taking another sip of his drink, forcing a smile as one of his friends says something he doesn’t quite register. Still, he nods along anyway. But all he can think about is her. The girl he’s known since he was seven years old. The one who always matched his chaotic energy. The only one who managed to beat him at Mario Kart and made fun of his haircuts and once almost peed herself laughing during a round of mini golf when they were thirteen.
His best friend.
Or at least, she used to be.
It has been different for a while. They only see each other at events now, like birthday parties and New Year’s gatherings. It sucks, but it’s better than not seeing her at all.
It started shifting the day she met her boyfriend — some guy from uni, older than her, quieter, a bit too polished for Lando’s liking. She said he made her feel seen. Lando didn’t say anything then, just nodded, smiled and pretended he wasn’t dying a little inside.
He told himself he was just being protective, but truth is, he never liked the guy. Something about him felt off, and Lando noticed it in the way he was too controlling and dismissive at times. But Lando had no proof, therefore, no real reason to speak up. So, he stayed quiet. Let the distance grow. Let the invites slow. Let her disappear into another life that didn’t include him the way it used to.
There are a few minutes left until midnight, and he’s still watching her. She smoothes her dress with the palm of her hand, breathes slowly a few times, then gets up from the couch, apologizing with a small smile every time she bumps into other people in her path. Then, she disappears down the hallway, shoulders hunched, phone still in her hand. Her head is down, like she’s trying to avoid any potential encounter. At that sight, something in Lando twists and, for a moment, he thinks she’s going after her boyfriend, his body instinctively tensing. But he relaxes when he realizes she’s just turned right instead, stepping out onto the balcony.
Without thinking, he sets his empty glass down and slips away from the crowd, past the streamers and glitter and flickering lights, heading in the same direction she went. It doesn’t surprise him when he finds her deep in thought, typing on her phone then shoving it angrily into her purse.
Her back is facing him, arms folded over the railing now, the cold air nipping at her exposed shoulders. She must be freezing, but she doesn’t seem to mind. She’s also not turning when she hears more steps, then the door closing.
She lets out a breath, but it’s not relief. More like she’s trying not to cry. “Hey, Lan.”
She doesn’t need to turn around to know it’s him. They’ve spent so much time in each other’s company that she’s memorized his footsteps, the sound of his sigh and the hesitation in his voice before he speaks whenever he’s unsure of his words.
Lando pauses a few feet behind her, careful, like he’s afraid she’ll shatter if he’s too loud. “You alright?”
Without waiting for her to answer, Lando just shrugs off his jacket and drapes it over her shoulders from behind. The girl stiffens for a second, then lets his scent settle around her like a familiar comfort.
She knows things that no one knows about him, like the way his laugh changes depending on who he’s with, but the real one, the high-pitched one that sounds like a hyena giving birth, only comes out when he’s with his friends. She can tell when he’s nervous just by the way he starts tapping his fingers against his thigh. She knows he prefers sleeping with the fan on, even during the winter, that he can’t eat spicy food without tearing up, and that he pretends to like certain people just to keep the peace.
Her best friend.
Or at least, he used to be.
“He left,” she finally says, her voice just a whisper.
Lando moves to stand beside her, copying her posture. “What happened?”
“He said he was going home, but I don’t know.”
He blinks, confused. “Midnight’s in, like… five minutes?”
She shrugs, wiping under her eye with a knuckle, trying to be discreet. “Yeah, well. Apparently I was laughing too loud and drinking too much and fooling around. I was embarrassing him. So he left.”
Lando stares at her, stunned. “It’s a party. What the fuck is he expecting you to do? Sit quietly in the corner and sip water?”
Her laugh is short and sad around the edges, “No, but I know he doesn’t like it when I’m loud or hyper or… whatever.”
There’s a long pause in which she reconsiders her behavior, thinking that maybe her boyfriend is right. Meanwhile, Lando tries to find the right words to counter every single lie that asshole has fed her, the annoyance flooding back in. He turns his head to look at her, and her profile knocks the wind out of him. Her eyes are wet and tired, like she’s trying to hold herself together for longer than just tonight.
“Don’t listen to him,” says Lando quietly, playfully bumping his shoulder against hers, “I love your loud laugh.”
She looks over at him then, a warm wave of safety covering her from head to toe, despite the cold that feels like it cuts across the skin of her face. The words settle heavy between them: I love your laugh. Not ‘it’s nice’. Not ‘it suits you’. I love it. It means more than he probably meant it to. Or maybe it means exactly what he’s never had the guts to say out loud. Until now.
Lando swallows before continuing, “I don’t get it,” he says, “You should be with someone who wants to hear you, no matter how loud or hyper you are. Who knows how lucky they are to be in your presence.” She laughs, as if dismissing his words, but Lando insists, “I’m serious. I still don’t understand why you’re with him.”
The girl lets out a shaky breath, fighting the urge to roll her eyes. “He wasn’t always like this.”
“I know.”
Lando’s answer sounds a little too sarcastic and, in response, the silence stretches between them once again. But it’s not empty this time. It’s charged. Heavy with everything they’ve never talked about, and all the months they spent apart.
She turns her eyes back to the view, but her fingers tug his jacket tighter around her body. And then, without looking at him, she speaks again, “No, you don’t. We didn’t talk much lately, so you wouldn’t know.”
Lando wastes no time, “And whose fault is it?”
She shifts her body towards him abruptly, “What is that supposed to mean?”
He shrugs. “Dunno. It was just a question.”
“Right,” she nods once. “I don’t even know why I’m talking to you about it. I guess I just… needed my friend for a minute.”
Lando nods too, and steps close enough that their arms brush. Before she can say anything else, he leans in, uncertain but determined, and wraps his arms around her. Her cheek presses against his shoulder, seeking his comfort. The only problem is that there’s nothing casual about how Lando’s heart starts to race. His arms come around her tightly, holding her like his life depends on it, even though she’s the one that’s been ditched by her boyfriend on New Year’s.
They stay like that for a while, their breaths fogging between them in the cold night air. The space they share gets warmer, which makes her snuggle into his chest. She smells like citrus and champagne and every memory he’s ever tried not to think about too hard when he was missing her.
The girl pulls back slightly, enough that her face is tilted up toward his. And when he reaches to cup her cheek, her skin is smooth beneath his palm, her lips slightly parted like she might say something, but doesn’t. They just stare at each other, the same way you only look at someone when you’ve missed them for too long, and you’re finally close enough to touch but terrified to move any further, thinking that maybe they’re not even real.
The countdown begins in the background, a little muffled through the glass door, people shouting numbers like a slow drumbeat from the inside.
Five.
Four.
Three.
Two.
“Break up with him,” Lando’s voice cuts through the haze, rougher than he intended.
One.
The cheers erupt from every direction. The sky bursts into a sea of light above them, fireworks flaring gold, silver, and pink. The noise is distant, like it’s happening on another planet. They wouldn’t know, because they don’t even look. Instead, her eyes are still searching his, confused and a little broken.
He could lean in and take it all, just this once, and blame it on the alcohol.
But she blinks, breaking the ephemeral magic of the moment. She takes a step back, then another, slow and cautious, until she’s out of his arms. “What?”
Lando doesn’t move. “You deserve better.”
“Lando…”
“No,” he shakes his head. “He treats you like shit,” his voice rises gradually, dipped in more emotion than he probably wants to show, “And I don’t know what’s worse: that you know it or that you allow it.”
She looks at him as if Lando is shapeshifting right before her eyes, and he does it far too quickly for her to have time to process.
“Stop assuming things about me,” she warns, all the warmth between them dissolving in an instant. “You don’t know.”
“I know he should’ve been here, kissing you right now. I know he made you cry instead,” he says, stepping forward, closing the distance that she put between them earlier. “I know he left you at a party alone because you were laughing too loud,” he continues, mockingly. “Do you hear how fucking ridiculous that sounds?”
Her voice is sharper next time she speaks, “You don’t know the full story, Lando. He asked me to go home with him, but—”
“I don’t care,” he interrupts her. “Looks like he ditches you whenever you’re too much for him. And I can bet this isn’t the first time he’s made you cry, is it?”
She scoffs, “Oh, so now you’re paying attention?” she asks, adopting a defensive attitude. “It’s been months since you’ve shown any interest in me.”
Lando flinches like she just slapped him. “You’re the one who stopped showing up. It’s cause you’ve gotten busier. With him, eh?”
“Smooth, Lando,” she fires back in a disappointed voice. “You pulled away first,” she reminds him, pointing a finger at his chest; tears threaten her eyes again, but she blinks rapidly to clear them away.
“Yeah, because I didn’t know where I fit anymore,” he says, his voice cracking around the edge of frustration. “You were always with him. Always defending him. I didn’t want to be that friend who hovered too close or some asshole that oversteps your boundaries. Because, believe me, I was so close to cross a lot of those before deciding to back the fuck up.”
She stares at him, incredulous, as if all the months they have been apart have completely changed her childhood best friend. “So, instead of talking to me, you just ghosted me? Very mature.”
Lando’s jaw tightens before replying, “I needed space.”
“You disappeared,” she corrects him. “You didn’t just take space. You shut me out.”
“That was me respecting your sorry ass relationship.”
“No,” she laughs dryly. “You were trying to make a point.”
Maybe, Lando thinks, looking away. But that’s not the whole truth. It’s painful, not to mention frustrating, to watch someone you care about being treated badly. It may have been selfish on his part, but Lando couldn’t stand by and watch the girl who deserved it all get only a piece of it.
“You don’t like him,” she continues, voice quieter now. “I get that. But instead of saying it, you just judged me from a distance.”
“No, I don’t like him,” he admits. “Matter of fact, I despise the guy. But not just because of who he is. It’s because he changes you.”
Her eyes narrow. “That’s not true.”
Lando laughs, but he’s not amused in the slighlest. “You went from having fun to crying in a matter of minutes. Because of him. How many times has this happened before?”
“He never—” she tries to warn him, before Lando cuts her off again.
“Keep defending him,” he says, irritated. “Because God forbid someone call you out when you’re being steamrolled by someone who doesn’t see your worth.”
“And God forbid you admit that maybe you’re not always right!” she snaps. “You don’t get to parachute in and act like some moral compass. If that’s the case, where the hell have you been all this time?”
The question silences them both. He can’t say too much without saying it all, and she’s waiting for something that won’t get to her. Not yet.
Disappointed, hurt, and extremely tired, she shrugs his jacket off and throws it at his chest. “Happy fucking New Year.”
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𝟳 𝗠𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗛𝗦 𝗟𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗥
📍 Somewhere off the Algarve coast, Portugal
AFTER THE HECTIC life she’s lived in the past few months, a weeklong yacht trip along the Portuguese coast is all she needs. Blue water, rosé on deck, and most importantly, no drama.
She says yes before she even checks the guest list, but that shouldn’t be a problem. Everybody in their group knows about the social distancing between her and Lando. Plus, she always checks his calendar, keeping an eye out for the weekends he’s away, racing, meaning she can tag along without stressing that they’re going to bump into each other.
Of course, she still watches his races. Just because they stop talking that doesn’t mean she stopped caring about the dream that Lando has been striving for since childhood. That’s also why she knows that Lando will be in the UK for at least another week, as he mentioned in the post-race interview, which won’t interfere with their little getaway.
By Friday, however, things change drastically. It’s only when she’s already halfway to the marina — after spending the entire afternoon shopping with the girls — that Max texts her.
BTW, just so you’re not surprised… Lando is flying in tonight. I know things aren’t great between you two right now, but he’s still my friend as much as you are, and I didn’t wanna lie or make it weird :D
You okay?
For a moment, everything seems to slow down, including her heartbeat. All the sounds that surrounds her fade into the background, while she tries to steady herself against the sudden rush of emotions.
Is she okay? Well, for the most part yes. But that’s because she haven’t seen Lando in months. There are many ways she can react when they’ll finally be face to face again, and she can’t decide which is worse. But in the end, it doesn’t even matter, because she simply doesn’t have the time to analyze every scenario.
I’ll survive, she texts back.
She will.
She has to.
It gets dark pretty late, but the night is warm, balmy with salt and wine in the air. They decorated the boat’s upper deck with a string of lanterns, their golden glow flickering against the white hull, gently illuminating the space. The music thumps lazily from a speaker somewhere, low enough not to overwhelm the sea’s waves but steady enough to pulse through bare feet on smooth wood.
Someone’s uncorking another bottle of vinho verde, and a few of the girls are still in their swimsuits, legs tucked beneath oversized linen shirts as they lounge across sun-warmed cushions.
She’s also barefoot, her skin kissed pink from the day, a loose skirt swaying at her thighs as she spins around one of the support poles, smiling wide; she decided, hours ago, that she won’t let anything ruin her vacation. It’s the first time in months she’s felt this light, and has no intention to let the feeling be washed away by the waves of a past so distant.
Only when she realizes that she is, in fact, invincible and that nothing can shake her confidence, she hears a familiar laugh, the same one she’ll recognize anywhere. But she doesn’t turn to it immediately. Instead, her body stiffens as fast as if it’s controlled by a remote.
He’s here and, suddenly, the breeze curling in from the sea feels somehow cooler. It’s just a voice, but it’s his, and it sounds so melodic in her ears, even after all this time.
When she finally turns around, all the noise dials down.
Lando’s standing on the deck like he’s never been gone, a duffel thrown over one shoulder, his curls slightly damp from the flight or the heat or the mist. He’s in a loose, black tank top and shorts, his sneakers untied like he didn’t even bother to fix them. He’s already smiling when he sees Max coming to greet him with a drink in hand, sliding easily into hugs and handshakes. Everything is so normal that she almost rushes to the stairs to jump into his arms.
As if he hears her thinking about him, Lando looks up and their eyes catch mid-movement.
The music doesn’t stop. No one freezes. The conversation continues. And yet something just between them shifts, making Lando still for a moment. His smile falters slightly. The duffel slides off his shoulder and drops at his feet. His gaze lingers longer than it should, because he seems genuinely surprised, like he hadn’t expected her to look the way she does — lighter, freer, happier than the last time he saw her.
Like a low-budget movie, they just look at each other for a while and then, barely perceptible, Lando nods once. It is a subtle, tired gesture. Not warm, but not hostile either. More like: I see you. I’ll behave.
And she nods back: I see you too. I’ll try.
That’s all that it is. A small breath of peace in the warzone. Because they both know that this vacation isn’t about them. There are too many people they both love here, too many memories tied up in this group to be so selfish as to ruin everyone’s fun.
With that, Lando disappears below deck with a few of the guys, and the party continues as if nothing happened.
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SOMEHOW, THEY’VE MANAGED.
It’s the last night on the boat together, and not once have they really spoken. Just kept on with the civil nods and carefully timed appearances. She took the mornings on the upper deck with a book and her sunglasses pulled low, while he suck to afternoons with Max and Keegan, sunbathing and pretending not to look over when she passed by.
Every time they went out for dinner, they sat at opposite ends of the table, pretending to be invested in conversations that barely held their attention.
When they went to explore the nearby cliffs and hidden beaches, they naturally split into smaller groups, Lando ending up with the boys, as usual, taking the off-road buggy trails that wind through dusty hills, while she tagged along with a few of the girls. They didn’t walk near each other. Didn’t even end up in the same group photo.
But the glances were a constant, and all of them have carried them both here, almost at the end.
There’s a bizzare quiet in the air tonight, the kind that only the sea can create — so deep, violent, and alive at the same time.
After soaking in her own heat for hours, she decides to step out of her cabin for a breath of fresh air.
They’ve ordered seafood for dinner, and her relationship with it is not exactly good. A small breeze brushes across her face, lifting her hair slightly, carrying with it the clean scent of salt. The boat rocks gently beneath her, and the stars above are strewn carelessly across the sky like spilled sugar.
The second she steps into the dark of the corridor and turns toward the small galley, her heart skips a beat. For good reason. Lando’s already there, barefoot and shirtless and deep in thought in the low light, leaning against the railing like he belongs in the night. One of his hands is resting on the cool metal, while the other is wiping the beads of sweat off his forehead.
His head turns when he hears her cat-like steps, eyes catching hers in the dark.
The only sounds are the gentle hush of the waves against the hull, and the occasional creak of the boat. Neither of them says anything, as if they don’t even know how to speak to each other after throwing cutting words at each other, all those months ago. The silence between them doesn’t make them feel awkward. Maybe just a little guarded. However, it’s very depressing, really, not having anything to say to the person who once knew absolutely everything about you.
It would be very easy for her to turn on her heels and walk back into her cabin, avoiding Lando, just like she has done all these days. But then she hears his whispered voice, and his mellow intonation is enough to make the entire planet stop from spinning.
“Everything okay?”
She swallows, caught in the stillness of the night as if she’s a thief. “Yeah,” she whispers back, even though it sounds more like a question than an answer. “Felt a bit sick.”
He nods slowly. “The shrimp?”
“The fucking shrimp,” she agrees.
Lando shrugs. “Ew.”
His reaction triggers a wave of warmth that washes over her, forcing a smile while thinking about the past. The memory flashes rudely uninvited. Still, she weclomes it with nothing but nostalgia in her heart. They were eight, crammed into a bed on a family vacation, and she’d eaten her weight in shrimp and clams at dinner, proudly declaring herself a seafood queen. Hours later, she threw it all up, right there, in bed, all over him. Lando woke up screaming, drenched in the smell of stomach acid, fish and betrayal and, ever since, he couldn’t even stand near a fish without gagging.
Cautious, she edges forward, bracing her arms on the railing only a couple feet apart from him, eyes fixed on the black stretch of sea. The moon paints a silver path across the water, waves shifting like oil under its light. For a few minutes, they just stand there like two ghosts, side by side, watching the view, but probably stuck in different memories.
“So, I’ll go back inside,” she says a little unsure.
His voice cuts through the quiet, “Stay,” says Lando without hesitation.
It’s not just the gentle plea that catches her off guard, but the way he says it. Like he means it more than he means anything else right now. Possibly more than he meant anything else ever.
Awkwardly, she moves forward, letting herself lean closer to him. That’s how she finds out that physical distance means absolutely nothing when it’s the emotional distance that kept them apart. More than that, there are many things left unsaid that fill that void.
Out of sheer curiosity — or plain stupidity, she’s not sure yet — the girl begins to walk uncertainly towards the edge of the space that separates them.
“You remember New Year’s?” she asks, the words coming out softer than she expects.
There is no trace of hatred or resentment behind her voice, which surprises her. She understands that she has, without realizing it, moved beyond their most tensed moment so far. And all that’s left now, besides her curiosity, is the fact that no matter how much time has passed, the two of them still know each other on a level they haven’t reached with anyone else.
Lando doesn’t look at her, but his jaw flexes. “Hard to forget.”
“I threw your jacket at you,” she continues with a small laugh.
“And stormed off like you were in a romcom.”
“To be fair, you were being a dick.”
He chuckles then, and the sound is gentle yet painfully nostalgic. “I probably was.”
“You talked like you knew everything. It was…” she hesitates, fingers tightening slightly on the rail, “A bit cruel. Even if it came from a good place.”
Lado nods. “I know,” he says, “I guess I didn’t know how to talk without sounding like some immature tantrum just because I was missing my friend.”
She glances at him then, studying the curve of his profile in the moonlight. The familiar slope of his perfect sculpted nose. The way his curls fall just a little longer then she remembered. The way he speaks but seems so deeply forgotten in the memory of that winter night.
“I broke up with him the next day,” she admits.
He turns, his eyes searching for hers. “Yeah,” says Lando, “I figured.”
Even though she tries her best, she can’t read his demeanor. He seems tense, even though their conversation isn’t hostile in any way. Not yet, at least. Still, Lando looks as if he’s bracing for some sort of impact that she’s not aware of. There something softer in his expression, though. Something hesitant that encourages her to keep him in that memory.
“I think about it sometimes,” she continues. “That night. All of it.”
He nods again. “Me too. ”
She looks over, eyes wide and cautious, but Lando doesn’t look away.
“But,” he continues, “I won’t apologize for what I said. Because I wasn’t wrong. You do deserve better. And maybe I had no right to say it the way I did, but I’d rather have fought with you than keep watchig you shrink yourself for someone who didn’t even appreciate you.”
His words hit like the waves, tightening her throat. “I get that. But in the moment, it made me feel…” she begins, eyes filling up with tears, “Like you stopped respecting me because of him. And I felt stupid for being so blinded that I lost sight of all the things that were the most important to me.”
The way Lando looks at her now makes her heart sink. Not with pity. Not even with regret. Just a dull ache, like he’s been carrying it with him for months, and he’s too tired to hold it tightly anymore.
“Come on, you know that’s not true,” he says. “I was just irritated and drunk. Watching you disappear like that wasn’t easy, and I didn’t know how to ask you to stay without sounding like a selfish prick. I should’ve just said something,” adds Lando. “Instead of sulking and keeping score and acting like you betrayed me for living your life,” he looks away then, back to the endless sea, eyes half-lidded like the movement of the waves might offer him something easier to face. Anything but this.
He had time to think and weigh his actions. But it all came down to those last few minutes, when it suddenly became too much for both of them.
“I missed you, Lando,” she confesses after a while, letting the words out in a small voice.
The silence that follows is no longer heavy with avoidance, but an intimate warmth that somehow infiltrates under her skin. It merges with all the sadness caused by the time they spent apart and, together, they create a new kind of feeling that she doesn’t yet know how to name. And, for some reason, she’s in no hurry to do so.
Uncertain yet courageous after hearing her admission, Lando’s hand finds hers along the railing and, to his surprise, she doesn’t pull away. Instead, she threads her fingers through his, like she was already waiting for it. For him.
It’s weird, she thinks, how their hands fit together like the end of a sentence that finally makes sense. So she keeps it there, feeling his pulse in her palm like it’s the most normal thing in the world. They can’t look at each other, though. And suddenly, the waves are so much more interesting than the mess they’ve created, their soft undulation bewitching them both, mirroring their feelings in a sick, twisted way; tamed at the surface, yet storming somewhere deeper.
In the chaos of her mind, she can feel the gentle way his thumb brushes the side of her hand. The way he squeezes her afterwards. Like a promise. And she knows, without either of them saying it, that this was always going to happen. That they are inevitable, like gravity pulling them toward the center of each other.
“Are we gonna go back to being cold in the morning?” he finds the strength to ask, voice barely above the hush of the tide.
Truth is, she doesn’t even know what the next few minutes will bring, let alone the next morning.
The girl turns her head slightly, her cheek pressing to his shoulder. “Well, I don’t know how to be your friend nowadays,” she admits, not to make him feel bad, but because that’s the only thing she’s sure of. Her truth.
Lando sighs, “Yeah, that’s not quite us anymore, hm?”
It takes another crushing silence before Lando turns to her completely. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter they can’t be friends anymore, because they’re way past that. Lando is way past that. All he wants is one chance to show her how much it means to him; every word, every touch and every single thought that’s been haunting him for days on end.
He looks like he’s on autopilot when he brings his other hand up to brush her jaw. After his movement, she takes the next step and leans into his touch. She opens her mouth, maybe to say his name, but the words don’t get the chance to get out, because Lando grabs her firmly and pulls her toward him. Hard. Like he can’t take the distance anymore.
His mouth crashes into hers without any warning. It isn’t careful. It isn’t sweet. It’s the result of months of silence, of aching, of watching and wanting and never having. It’s teeth clashing, breath catching, fingers curling so hard into skin that it’ll leave marks.
She gasps into his mouth, as if the ground is crumbling beneath her feet, but at the same time, it’s the most exciting feeling she’s ever felt. Her arms are instinctively wrapping around his shoulders, pulling him closer like she’s been just as consumed by what they didn’t say. Lando fists a hand in her hair, the other gripping her waist tight enough to bruise. He’s all fire, hot and desperate, and there’s not enough water that surrounds them to cool what’s raging in his chest.
He gives her the kind of kiss that says I missed you too and I’m sorry and I never stopped thinking of you all at once. Her hand constricts around his bicep, grounding herself in the feel of him: his salty lips and the way he exhales with a relieved sigh like she’s air after being underwater for far too long. It’s impossible not to feel how much he needed this, because there’s nothing left unsaid in the way he holds her. The truth — his truth — was always there, waiting for the moment they’d both be brave enough to let in.
The kiss deepens before either of them realizes what’s happening. And it’s her who leans in a bit further. That brings him back to the present moment, not because she is just as desperate, but because of how much she means it. How much she wants this. It’s right there, in the way her mouth moves over his, open and urgent, like a need that’s been burning for too long. It makes Lando groan silently when her teeth graze his bottom lip, her tongue flicking against his like a dare. A dare that he answers to, meeting her halfway, teasing, then licking into her mouth with a skilled confidence that makes her head spin.
Oh, he’s a good kisser.
Dizzy from the sudden intensity, she clings to his neck, tilting her head as he takes control, his hands finding their way back to her waist after roaming up and down her body, guiding her back a few steps until her spine presses lightly to the railing. The breeze kisses across her bare legs, her thin nightdress doing nothing to hide the way her body shivers. Or how hard he gets against her. She feels it instantly, like a sharp contrast between his swim trunks and her body, and it sends a jolt of heat right between her thighs.
Her breath hitches once they stop, glancing up at him, caught between amusement and want. “What are you so excited for?”
Lando meets her gaze with an innocent grin twitching at his lips as he shrugs, “Sorry.”
She can’t help but laugh at the absurdity of the situation she finds herself in. Loud. The kind of laugh that throws her head back a little and makes her cover her mouth when she realizes its heat.
Lando just watches her, enchanted by her mere existence. And, without thinking twice, he asks, “How can anyone be embarrassed by that laugh?”
The sudden comment silences both of them. Lando, because he just heard himself saying it out loud. And her, because of how sincere he sounds. How tender.
Still grinning, he lets his forehead fall against hers. They may never encounter such a moment of peace again, so neither of them hesitates to take it where it’s supposed to go to: her tiny cabin. The narrow door clicks shut behind them, and the space is barely big enough for one person, let alone the two of them tangled in something so close it’s hard to tell where tension ends and need begins.
She backs into the bed, and Lando follows, eyes fixed to her like she’s the only girl ever. When they finally collapse onto the mattress, it creaks under their weight. Their knees bump. Shoulders brush. Lando’s arm wraps around her waist in an instant, and she fits there like it’s hers. That grip. Him.
Somehow, he’s bigger than she remembers. Or maybe she’s just never noticed how broad his chest is, how his legs stretch past the foot of her bed, how small her frame feels when she pulls him into her. And now, in the closeness of their embrace, it’s impossible not to feel it.
It intimidates her, but she keeps her hands all over him, warm skin meeting her palms. Her eyes roam without shame, wandering from his abdomen up to his pecs and then stop on his freshly kissed lips. Her fingers trail along his arms, feeling the strength carved into muscle by years of racing and tension. She watches the way goosebumps rise under her touch, and when her hand flattens over his chest, just above his heart, Lando exhales heavily, with a slight shudder.
He doesn’t look away, though. He doesn’t have the heart or enough willpower. He simply looks back at her, eyes burning, as if seeing her underneath him like this is the only normal thing in their messed up lifes.
“I need to know where’s your head at,” he says, his long fingers brushing the outside of her thigh.
She closes her eyes for a moment. Mostly because she finds it hard to pay attention when her childhood friend — the skinny little boy who used to be blown away by the slightest breeze — is now on top of her in the flesh, displaying groups of muscles she’s never seen on his body before, let alone touched.
Her hand stays on his chest, “Am I ever going to get my best friend back?”
His hearts breaks a little, because he realizes that both of them know the implications of her question. The answer, too, but she still wants to hear him saying it, because that’s the only thing that’ll make it true.
Lando’s eyes search hers for a moment too long, and something in him rearrange, the muscle in his jaw tightening before he leans in. “No,” he simply replies.
She figured. Still, it is not necessarily the answer itself that makes her emotional, but the way Lando said it, as if it is torture for him to even admit it.
“I can’t ruin myself over and over again, pretending that what I feel for you is small. It never was.”
She nods, lifting her hand to the back of his neck, threading her fingers into his hair and pulling him down until their lips are barely brushing. Lando’s hands are pulling at her, slowly sliding the straps of her dress down. He takes his time, undressing her like he’s unwrapping a present he’s waited far too long to touch. And when she’s standing there, bare and warm and only for him to see, he sits back to stare and take as many mental pictures as he can.
“You’re…” he starts, voice nearly breaking, “So fucking beautiful.”
She presses closer, hands moving to his shorts with urgency. Lando lets her, barely breathing and, when the last layer falls away, she looks down at him. All of him. His golden skin that glows in the dim light filtering through the porthole, muscles tightening under her hungry touch.
Impatient, his hand slides between her legs while maintaining eye contact, his fingertips brushing over the soft skin at her inner thigh before he presses just lightly against her entrance. The reaction is immediate, a sharp breath followed by a soft whimper that catches in her throat. Her hips instinctively lift toward him, and his own breath wavers at the sound.
“So wet,” he breaks off, almost spiraling from the realization, from finding out just how much she wants him. Just like he wants her.
For a moment, there’s something feral in his gaze, something that won’t let her move her eyes. Like he’s balancing on a tightrope of restraint, and she’s the drop waiting to pull him under.
“It kills me,” he admits. Then he leans in, lips brushing against the shell of her ear, “But you need to be quiet, darling.”
She nods, her breath still uneven, knowing it’s going to be anything but easy.
Lando presses a kiss to her shoulder, then her collarbone before he continues, “Even though I love it when you’re loud, you’ll have to save that for later.”
Just the thought of her, waiting for his next move all warm and wanting, has his cock already pulsing in his palm. He strokes himself slowly, gaze locked on her as she shifts beneath him, spreading wider with a shaky inhale.
As curious as ever, she glances down between them, eyes filled with want, and he watches her bite her lower lip at the sight of him, so hard and ready. The gap between them closes quickly, suspended in that final moment before everything changes. Her fingers curl into the sheets, watching Lando lining himself up, just barely brushing against her clit. Then, he pushes in with a whimper that sounds like it’s been clawing at his throat for months. Like this moment has been sitting just under his skin, waiting to become real.
“Fuck,” he pants, silently. “You feel better than I ever imagined.”
Right now, all her senses are inhibited by him. The weight, the stretch, the warmth, the way his hands frame her hips like she’s the only thing keeping him in check, and she’s the only reason why Lando isn’t unleashing hell yet. Her legs wrap around his waist, holding him close, as if her body already knows what her heart won’t let her say.
Lando. Lando. Lando!
But he shakes his head, his voice going lower than normal, “No, baby, Let me.”
The bed is laughably small, making Lando huff out a frustrated breath, one arm sliding under her thigh as he shifts them both, gripping her firmly to guide her where he needs her. It’s not graceful in any way, but there’s something about the way he manhandles her, lifting, adjusting, controlling the angle until it’s perfect, that makes her head fall back with a gasp.
He exhales through his nose, lips pressing in a thin line to avoid making sounds that could get them both into trouble. “There. That’s it.”
She lets him move her, pliant and trusting, her breath getting heavier when their skin brushes in all the right places. Every thrust is slow at first, drawing soft moans from her mouth that only make him harder. The way her body reacts only fuels him, encouraged by the way her lashes flutter, and the way her hands slide into his hair when she can’t find the words. She couldn’t say it anyway. Can’t give voice to what’s blooming and breaking inside her.
But Lando feels it in the way she moves with him, and how her body opens like it was always meant to. That pushes him to thrust harder, feeling like the entire boat shakes at the force.
“Easy. You’re gonna break the bed,” she says against his jaw, her voice a breathy laugh.
“Wouldn’t be the worst thing I’ve broken over you,” he mutters back, but there’s no malice in his tone, except a dangerous affection that’s always lived under his skin when it came to her.
It makes her curious to know what he means, but just as she’s about to ask, Lando finds that angle where their bodies align like puzzle pieces that should’ve never fit but somehow do. He rocks into her so sweetly, and that’s enough to silence her. The answer is in the way her breath stutters. The way her fingers grip his arms. The way her body pulls him in and clenches around his length like it’s never known anything else.
“Shit. Again, please,” Lando breathes wetly against her skin. “Do that again,” he repeats, already buried to the hilt, grinding against that perfect spot inside her, that once he found it, it’s impossible to stop. “Mhm. Let me make it right.”
“You said you can’t,” she challanges him, barely able to speak. “So stop taking your sweet time, Norris,” she pants, breathless but defiant, smirking even as her thighs tremble around his hips.
Lando lifts his head, curls damp against his forehead, eyes dark with a sudden annoyance. “Yeah? That’s how he’s had you all this time? Quick, in and out, job done?”
Her smirk drops into a scoff, her hands pressing against his chest like she might shove him off. But she arches into him instead, loving the way her back rubs against the mattress with each push.
“If anything, he had the balls to be honest with me.”
“Fuck’s sake,” he thrusts deeper, making her gasp mid-retort. “Stop defending him, will ya?”
The sheets are already half off the bed, twisted and forgotten, heat pulsing like a heartbeat between them. Lando starts moving inside her with a relentless rhythm, as if trying to erase anyone who came before him with every shove. But she won’t give him the silence he craves.
Not anymore.
Her head tilts back, sweat glistening at her collarbone, but her eyes are sharp, ready to catch his reaction. “No wonder you drive like that. Always trying to prove you’re better than the last guy, aren’t you?”
His hips slam forward, hard enough to make her gasp again, fingers bruising against her waist. “That’s rich coming from the girl who settled for someone who didn’t even know how to fuck her, let alone treat her right.”
She bites her lip, not in surrender but to hide the moan that slips out anyway. Her nails dig into his back, dragging down like a punishment until he grunts. “You’re such a coward,” she snaps. “At least he didn’t treat every conversation like a race he had to win.”
All of a sudden, Lando slows his movements, grinding deep, making her eyes roll before he fucks back into her harder than before. Only to make a point. Only to see all the places he takes her to.
“‘Cause he had the habit of abandoning before it even started, isn’t it? How many times did you have to fake it?”
Her eyes snap to his, speechless, but Lando doesn’t blink. He grins at her, knowing he is waiting for an answer he’ll never get.
She kisses him then, hard and angry, pouring all the emotions she never thought Lando, of all people, would ever awaken in her. Then she pushes him, her legs squeezing around his waist, her action emphasizing the duality of the thoughts going through her mind.
“Just so we’re clear. You’re not the first to try and fuck me into forgetting,” she finally replies.
At that, Lando stops for a breath, not from exhaustion but from the way her words claw straight through his big ego. He slams into her again, smiling at her, hand catching her thigh to spread her wider. “But I’m the one who’s going to succeed.”
She’s so close, he can feel it in the way her body aches to keep his cock inside and how her insults start to blend with moans. What amazes him, though, is the strength she has to continue their little argument, as if they’re not in the middle of something else right now.
“Never thought you could be such an asshole, it’s unbelievable.”
Lando doesn’t even blink when he speaks again, “He made you cry on New Year’s,” he growls, voice sharp, like a blade slipping between her ribs. “And I’m the asshole?”
Before she can throw a retort back, he tilts his hips, changing the angle, and drives into her so sudden that it knocks the breath from her lungs. Her back arches, while her hips are lifting to meet every punishing thrust.
“Lando,” she moans his name, arms winding around his shoulders like she’s holding on for dear life.
She can feel him in places she didn’t even know could feel. He’s fucking her with such intensity it turns into a blur of slick skin and strangled whimpers, the bed creaking beneath them.
The banter dies somewhere along the way, and all that’s left behind is the heat, the pounding rhythm, the kind of pleasure that makes thoughts disappear and stars dance behind their eyes. Her brows are scrunched, eyes glazed, and she realizes she’s about to scream. Actually scream.
Luckily, Lando places a hand over her mouth just in time, muffling the broken sounds pouring out of her throat. It takes her by surprise, realizing how well he knows all her signals without ever telling him. But it’s easy for him. Especially when he sees the way her body’s trembling under his weight, and the way her eyes plead and challenge all at once.
He nods, hips pistoning into her, watching her come apart beneath him, a quiet, shaking mess.
“Yeah,” he grunts as quiet as possible through gritted teeth, “That’s it. Just me now.”
The words hang in the sweat-soaked air as she comes around his length, clenching so tight it nearly takes him with her. Lando doesn’t stop moving. Instead, he talks her through it, his voice breathless against her ear.
“That’s my girl, let it all out. So fucking perfect.”
Her nails sink further into his back, riding the aftershocks with his cock still buried deep, stretching her in all the ways she was craving. It brings him right on the edge, and with a frustrated cry, Lando pulls out, the head of his cock flushed and swollen as it rests hot and heavy against her thigh. He lets himself go at the sight, thick ropes spilling messily onto her skin. Sticky. Warm. Heavenly.
“Lan,” she breathes, half a protest, half a moan, reaching up to drag him back on top of her.
Lando can’t resist the pull. Not when her touch unravels him with every glide of her fingers over his skin. He used to dream of it, but the reality is always better. He kisses her again, softer this time, letting the moment stretch before his hand finds the curve of her breast, fingers teasing with just enough pressure to make her arch against him. Patiently, his thumb sweeps over her nipple, circling, pressing, feeling it harden under his touch.
It makes her whimper, her hands fisting in his hair. Lando’s lips find the column of her throat then, biting gently just beneath her jaw. Her sounds light him up like the fireworks they didn’t witness that night. He trails his kisses down to her collarbone, one palm flattening over her stomach before traveling back up.
Somehow, the chaos has slowed, but the heat is still there.
Their bodies are tangled in ways that no one could tell where she starts and where he ends, the mess between them so satisfying. When their eyes meet again, he sees her flushed cheeks, the sheen of sweat on her brow, and her chest heaving. Her eyes are so vulnerable as she looks back at him — her Lando, stripped down and completely wrecked.
And without a single word, he slides back in.
No sharp words, no angry breathing. Just the sound of their pants, the wet glide of his cock moving inside her, the weight of emotion that neither of them dares to name. Every thrust is unhurried this time around, his sweaty forehead resting against hers, like he’s trying to memorize the feel of her walls fluttering around him, the way her thighs lock around his waist with each roll of his hips.
It’s not just sex anymore. Is so much more than that, something that will linger for a quite some time after they part tonight. And they both know it.
When the pressure builds again, it’s different. There’s less fire. More ache. She blinks up at him, and her lips tremble. Tears pool at the corners of her eyes, not from physical pain, but from the overwhelming closeness of it all.
Lando sees it, and kisses them away.
“I’ve got you,” he whispers.
And when he comes again, it’s with a quiet groan right against her lips, buried deep as her body pulls him in, taking every drop of his pleasure and keeping him as if he belongs to her from now on. All of it. All of him.
The silence that surrounds them afterwards feels too full. She lets him stay there, wrapped around her, her fingers idly tracing his back. But her gaze is distant, fixed on the ceiling, already somewhere else.
For now, at least, they can coexist in the same world, breathing each other in until the reality will catch them from behind.
But that’s a problem for tomorrow morning.
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ MASTERLIST . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
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Thank you for reading!
None of my works are available for reposting on other platforms. Reblogs, likes, and comments are deeply appreciated ♥︎
© trashy track tales, 2025
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ginalinettiofficial · 2 years ago
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already posted one fic to ao3 today but might fuck around and post another in another fandom just to keep things spicy
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fear-less · 6 months ago
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pls i need harry content 😭
₊˚⊹˚ 𐙚 he's like a poem I wish I wrote
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pairing: harry potter x f!reader
➥ In which, harry finally confesses his feelings towards his closed off friend.
Warnings:black cat gf golden retriever bf, reader is a gryffindor, fluff, no smut but it gets 𝓯𝓻𝓮����𝓴𝔂, they make out, idk what else 
a/n: I was trying not to write too much harry BUT HEY, if u guys like him sm I will no longer hold myself back🙏
2.4k words 
It was a crisp autumn day at Hogwarts, the kind where the air was cool but not biting, and the leaves scattered across the grounds in hues of amber and crimson. You were sitting by the Great Lake, a book in hand, when you heard the familiar crunch of footsteps behind you. You didn’t need to turn around to know who it was.
“Skipping lunch again?” Harry’s voice called out, warm and teasing.
You turned to face him, raising an eyebrow. “Maybe I just enjoy the quiet. Not everyone’s a bundle of energy like you, Potter.”
Harry grinned, undeterred by your sharp tone. “Or maybe you just enjoy pretending to be aloof. I brought you a pumpkin pasty, by the way.” He held it out, and despite your best efforts, a small smile tugged at the corner of your lips.
“Fine,” you said, taking the pasty. “Thanks.”
Harry plopped down beside you, his untidy black hair catching the sunlight. His green eyes sparkled with a mix of mischief and warmth that could charm anyone—though you’d never admit it aloud. You’d always been the reserved one, the one who observed from the shadows, while Harry was the embodiment of sunshine, drawing people to him effortlessly.
“So, what are you reading this time?” he asked, leaning closer to peer at your book.
“It’s a Muggle mystery novel,” you replied, shifting slightly to keep the book out of his reach. “Not that you’d understand it.”
Harry laughed, the sound loud and unabashed. “Is that a challenge? You know I love a good mystery.”
You rolled your eyes but couldn’t suppress the fondness in your voice. “I think your idea of a mystery involves chasing after enchanted keys or dodging cursed objects. This is a bit more subtle.”
The two of you sat there for a while, the easy banter flowing between you. Despite your contrasting personalities, you’d always found comfort in Harry’s presence. His warmth balanced your cool demeanor, and his relentless optimism chipped away at your walls in a way that no one else could.
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
Over the weeks, your time together became more frequent. Whether it was studying in the library, sneaking out to the kitchens for a late-night snack, or simply wandering the castle grounds, Harry seemed to seek you out more and more. You didn’t mind—though you’d never admit how much you looked forward to his company.
One evening, you were curled up in an armchair in the common room, a book in hand, when Harry bounded over, his energy as infectious as ever.
“You’re always reading,” he teased, flopping into the seat across from you. “How do you ever have time for fun?”
“This is fun,” you replied without looking up. “Not everyone feels the need to be constantly moving, you know.”
Harry leaned forward, resting his chin on his hands. “But wouldn’t it be more fun if you had company? Say, someone to annoy you until you finally agree to take a break?”
You shot him a pointed look but couldn’t hide the amusement in your eyes. “And I suppose you’re volunteering for that role?”
“Obviously,” he said with a grin. “Who else could do it as well as me?”
Despite your best efforts, you found yourself smiling. Harry’s golden retriever energy was hard to resist, and as much as you pride yourself on being unshakable, he always managed to find the cracks in your armor.
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
It was during a Quidditch match that Harry first realized something had shifted. Gryffindor was playing Slytherin, and you were sitting in the stands, your usual reserved demeanor on display. But when Harry made a particularly daring move to dodge a Bludger, you’d leapt to your feet, your hands clenched tightly around the railing.
After the match, as the team celebrated in the common room, Harry’s eyes sought yours across the crowd. You were sitting in your usual corner, your expression carefully neutral, but when your gaze met his, a flicker of warmth passed between you. It left him wondering if there was something more beneath your guarded exterior.
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
One snowy afternoon, the two of you ventured out to the courtyard. The air was crisp, and snow blanketed the grounds in a pristine white. You’d been reluctant to leave the warmth of the castle, but Harry’s enthusiasm was contagious.
“Come on,” he said, tossing a snowball at you. “Even you can’t resist a little fun in the snow.”
You glared at him, brushing the snow from your cloak. “You’re impossible, Potter.”
“And you’re predictable,” he shot back with a grin. “But I’ll take that as a challenge.”
Before you could respond, he launched another snowball at you. What started as a one-sided attack quickly turned into a full-blown snowball fight, laughter echoing through the courtyard as you darted behind pillars and trees for cover. Finally, Harry tackled you into a snowbank, both of you breathless and laughing.
“Truce?” he asked, his green eyes shining with mischief.
“Truce,” you agreed, your cheeks flushed from the cold and the exertion.
As you lay there, side by side in the snow, the playful atmosphere shifted. Harry’s laughter faded, and he turned to look at you, his expression softening.
“You know,” he began, his voice quieter now, “you’re not as tough as you pretend to be.”
You raised an eyebrow, but before you could retort, he continued.
“I mean, you act all aloof and mysterious, but you’re one of the kindest people I know. You just don’t let many people see it.”
His words caught you off guard, and for a moment, you didn’t know what to say. Harry’s gaze was steady, his usual playful demeanor replaced by something deeper, something more earnest.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said finally, though your voice lacked its usual bite.
Harry smiled, reaching out to brush a snowflake from your hair. “Sure you don’t.”
The gesture was so simple, so natural, but it sent a warmth spreading through you that had nothing to do with the cold. For the first time, you allowed yourself to meet his gaze fully, and in that moment, everything seemed to shift.
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
The realization came slowly, like the first rays of sunlight after a long night. Neither of you said anything right away, but from that day on, the dynamic between you began to change. The teasing became softer, the moments of silence more comfortable. Harry’s golden retriever energy still clashed with your black cat personality, but instead of opposing forces, you began to feel like two halves of a whole.
One evening, as the two of you sat in the common room by the fire, Harry seemed uncharacteristically quiet. You glanced at him, noticing the way his hands fidgeted with the hem of his jumper.
“Alright, Potter. Out with it,” you said, setting your book aside. “What’s going on in that overly active brain of yours?”
He looked up at you, his green eyes meeting yours with a vulnerability you hadn’t seen before. “I... I’ve been thinking,” he began, his voice quieter than usual. “About us.”
You blinked, caught off guard. “Us?”
Harry nodded, taking a deep breath before continuing. “I don’t think I’ve ever been very good at hiding how I feel. And when it comes to you... I just can’t pretend anymore.”
Your heart thudded in your chest as he shifted closer, his expression earnest and open. “I care about you. A lot more than just as a friend. You make everything feel... brighter. And I know we’re different, but I think that’s what makes it work. You make me want to be better, and I can’t imagine not having you by my side.”
For a moment, you were silent, the weight of his words sinking in. Harry’s gaze didn’t waver, even as a faint blush crept up his cheeks.
“I... I didn’t think you felt that way,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “I thought I was just another friend to you.”
“You’ve never been just another friend,” Harry said firmly. “Not to me.”
Something inside you softened, the walls you’d carefully built around your heart crumbling under the warmth of his words. Tentatively, you reached out, your fingers brushing against his.
“I care about you too, Harry,” you said, a small, genuine smile breaking through your usual reserved demeanor. “More than I realized.”
Relief and joy lit up his face, and before either of you could second-guess, Harry leaned in. His lips met yours, soft and hesitant at first, as if afraid to break the moment. But as you kissed him back, the hesitance melted away, replaced by a warmth that felt like coming home.
When you finally pulled away, Harry rested his forehead against yours, a wide grin on his face. “Well, that’s one mystery solved.”
You laughed softly, your cheeks warm. “You’re impossible, Potter.”
“And you’re perfect,” he replied, his eyes sparkling with affection.
For the first time, you didn’t argue.
Summer had arrived at last, and with it, a welcome break from the hustle and bustle of Hogwarts. You and Harry had been inseparable since that snowy afternoon. The teasing, the gentle banter, the quiet moments of understanding—everything felt like it had fallen into place. But now, as the summer stretched out before you, things had shifted once again. You were no longer just two friends trying to figure things out; you were together, in every sense of the word.
You hadn’t been entirely sure what to expect when Harry came to visit your home for the first time, but here he was, standing on the doorstep of your family’s house, his usual grin brighter than ever. He'd gotten a bit bolder since you’d started dating—especially when it came to little touches, lingering glances, and teasing words that seemed to have a new weight behind them.
“I can't believe you actually live here,” Harry said, looking around at the cozy, quiet neighborhood, his eyes wide with curiosity.
You gave him a playful roll of your eyes as you led him inside. “It's not the Burrow, Potter, but it’s home.”
Your parents weren’t around for the day—out visiting relatives, leaving you with plenty of time to spend with Harry. It was still early, the sun hanging low in the sky, but there was a languid, warm energy in the air. You felt more at ease than you’d ever been before, Harry’s presence at your side a comfort.
Once inside, Harry took off his shoes, following you into the living room. The house was quieter than the bustling castle, the kind of peace you’d grown up with. You gestured to the couch. “Make yourself comfortable. I’ve got a few things to do, but you can, uh, hang out here.”
Harry was already plopping down onto the couch, kicking back with a sigh. “No complaints here. This place is nice.”
You nodded, disappearing for a moment to grab drinks from the kitchen, but when you came back, Harry was looking at you with an unreadable expression.
"Something on your mind?" you asked, arching an eyebrow.
He didn’t answer at first, instead leaning forward slightly, his voice dropping to a hushed, serious tone. "I’ve been thinking a lot about… us." His gaze met yours with an intensity that made your breath catch.
You froze for a second, the air between you thickening. You weren't sure if he was being playful, or if he was genuinely serious, but the way he was looking at you sent a thrill running through your chest.
“What do you mean?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady.
Harry smirked but didn’t look away. "Well, we’re not exactly... new to this anymore, are we?"
The playful glint in his eyes made your heartbeat a little faster, but before you could reply, Harry was standing up, crossing the room in a few quick steps. He stopped right in front of you, his eyes trailing over your face as if he was memorizing every inch of you.
He didn’t say anything more. He simply reached out, gently brushing a stray lock of hair from your face, his fingertips grazing your skin in a way that made your pulse spike. His hand lingered there for a moment longer than necessary, the warmth of his touch sending a jolt of electricity through you.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been more sure of something,” he whispered, his voice low and thick with meaning.
You didn’t say anything—couldn’t, really. All the thoughts in your head scrambled together as Harry’s lips met yours, soft and tentative at first, but with a hunger that made the world around you blur.
His kiss deepened as he pulled you closer, one hand sliding around your waist, the other moving to the back of your neck, drawing you in even tighter. You could feel the heat of his body against yours, the way he seemed to melt into you. You responded in kind, your hands finding the edge of his shirt, fingers brushing against his skin, and the contact made the already suffocating atmosphere feel even more intense.
He pulled away just slightly, enough to breathe. His forehead rested against yours, and you both lingered there for a moment, catching your breath.
“I’ve wanted this for so long,” Harry murmured, his lips brushing against your ear as his hands traced slow circles on your back.
“Then why wait?” you whispered back, your voice sounding foreign to your own ears.
Without another word, Harry kissed you again, this time more urgently, more desperately, as if he couldn’t hold back any longer. His hands roamed to your waist, pulling you flush against him, and you could feel the shift in the energy between you, the building anticipation.
The kiss broke as you both gasped for air, but Harry’s hands found their way to your face again, his touch still as gentle as it was fierce. His eyes locked with yours. "Are you sure?"
You didn’t answer with words. Instead, you closed the distance between you again, kissing him with all the emotion, all the longing you’d kept buried for so long.
And in that moment, the world outside the house ceased to exist. It was just you and Harry, tangled together in the quiet intimacy of this new chapter in your relationship. The summer sun streamed through the windows, casting long shadows across the room, but all you could focus on was the feel of his hands on your skin, the warmth of his breath, and the unspoken promise of more to come.
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hayleythesugarbowl · 9 months ago
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hey girlyyyyy could you maybe write for Tim Bradford from the rookie and like the reader is his rookie and while they’re on patrol they run into someone who knows the reader’s abusive ex bf and he makes threats against reader and after their shift reader is super scared so he escorts them home and stays with them idk just an idea 😅
Nightlight || Tim Bradford x reader
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ masterlist • john nolan fic  ⋆˚。⋆୨୧⋆
summary: when you encounter a man while on patrol who has a threatening message from your ex, your TO, Tim, offers to spend the night with you
word count: 10.4k
warnings: abusive past relationship, reader kind of has a panic attack, mild language, blood, guns, inaccurate police stuff
a/n: ahhh i had so much fun writing this, love!! i took your idea and also added some stuff so i hope you like what i did. i also apologize for the length, i kinda went wild. i imagine this to take place in s1. fem!reader. enjoy!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
     “7-Adam-19, armed shoplifter, Radcliffe Complex, 718 Oscar Road. Respond.”
     The dispatcher’s voice filled the silence of the car.
     “7-Adam-19 responding.” Officer  Bradford set down the radio and replaced his hand on the steering wheel.
     “What’s the most important thing to remember when dealing with an armed shoplifter, Boot?” Tim asked you after a moment. 
     “Why did I think that when I was in short-sleeves I would get a break from your Tim Tests?” you muttered.  
     You’d been Bradford’s rookie for seven months now and some days he still treated you like it was your first day on the force. You appreciated him trying to teach you so thoroughly, but did he have to be so Tim all the time?
     “Is that your answer, Boot?” 
     “No, um, I guess it would be that he’s armed. But no, that’s too obvious for you. Ok, what about what they’re stealing? Their physical state? Keeping their hands in sight at all times?”
     Tim sighed, looking bored. “Wrong. It’s—”
     “Suspect on the move, heading east on Apple Boulevard,” came the dispatcher’s update, interrupting your TO’s answer.
     “Looks like we’re headed east,” Tim said, turning sharply in the direction you’d just come from. 
     “Saved by the suspect,” you joked. 
     “Don’t think this is over,” Tim narrowed his eyes at the road. “Lessons don’t stop for crime.”
     “Ok, batman.”
     Tim glared at you.
     “I mean, Sir.”
     After you’d first been assigned to Officer Bradford, you’d been told stories of his ruthless training style. Your first thought was that you needed to impress him from day one.
     Well, technically your first thought was damn, because you’d have to be insane not to notice how objectively attractive he was. But you’d quickly quelled that thought—crushing on your TO was not how you wanted to start your career as an officer. 
     So, impressing him was your second thought. And you had been more than a little terrified of not impressing him. 
     You would be lying if you said that wasn’t how things still were between you two, to a degree—you trying to prove yourself and him making it as difficult as possible. 
     But, at least after several months, you felt like your TO trusted you more. 
     “There!” You pointed to a man running down the street, duffel bag in hand.
     Tim hit the gas, surpassing the suspect, and skidding to a stop in front of him, effectively cutting him off. 
     You both hurried out of the car, weapons drawn on the man who was currently aiming his gun back and forth, between you and Bradford. 
     “Police! Drop your weapon!” Tim shouted at the man. 
     The man hesitated, seeming to be weighing his options—how easily he could take out two cops. 
     “Set the weapon down, nice and easy,” Tim ordered, his own gun still pointed at the suspect.”
     The man, seeming to sense the inevitability of his capture, sighed and set his gun on the ground. 
     “The answer was dialogue, by the way,” Tim addressed you, his eyes still on the suspect. “Dialogue is the most important  thing when dealing with an armed suspect.”
     “Good to know,” you acknowledged, before ordering the man in front of you. “Hands behind your head, interlace your fingers.”
     The man’s gaze shot to you as he obeyed your commands. 
     “Hey, lady cop, you look familiar,” the criminal squinted at you. 
     “You must have me mistaken for someone else,” you said. You’d never seen this man in your life. 
     “I swear—”
     “Hands on the car!” You ordered 
     The man reluctantly did what he was told, placing his palms on the side of the shop. 
      “Wait a minute,” the man sized you up before smirking slowly. “Your Paul Cranston’s girl, ain’t ya?”
     You felt your blood instantly run cold at the name. 
     “You must have me mistaken for someone else,” you said again, robotically, grabbing one of his arms. 
     “No, no I’d recognize that pretty face anywhere,” the criminal whispered. “He told me all about you. Hey, why don’t you let me go and I’ll give you a friendly tip?”
     You responded by twisting his arm behind his back even harder.
     He winced. “So you didn’t hear then? Paul’s out.”
     No. That couldn’t be true. Paul wasn’t supposed to be out for—
     “Boot, you going to cuff him or not?” Tim called impatiently.
     “Right.” You shook off the stupor and began handcuffing the suspect. Your mind was still on that name, however, and your reflexes were slowed.
     Which is how the suspect was able to rip his arm from your grip and shove you to the ground as he tried to make a break for it. 
     Tim tackled him almost immediately, wrestling him into the cuffs that were dangling on one of his wrists where you had started to restrain him, and pushing him towards the shop.
     “Wait, Paul’s got a message for you!” the man hurried out, looking only at you as Tim waked over and shoved him into the backseat. “He said you best watch yourself, because he has connections, and he still hasn’t gotten his revenge. He’s out—and he’s coming for you.”
     “That’s enough, get in the car.” Tim slammed the door shut, and the echo of it rang in your ears as the man’s words played over and over again.
     He’s out, and he’s coming for you. 
     “What the hell was that?” 
     You looked up to Bradford’s questioning—and furious—face. He offered you a hand and you took it, standing up to face him. 
     “Sorry, I—”
     “‘Sorry’ doesn’t stop criminals from escaping,” Tim shouted. “Get your head in the game. You do want to be a cop, don’t you, Boot?”
     “Yes, sir.”
     So much for Tim trusting you. You couldn’t believe you’d almost just let a suspect get away. That had never happened to you before. But, that name—
     Your TO shook his head, walking to the drivers side and opening the door. “You know, I should write you up for that.”
     You noticed his wording. “But you’re not going to?”
     He waited for you to get into the passenger seat before saying, 
     “I didn’t say that. First you’re going to tell me what just happened between you two.”
     You flinched. “It—nothing. It was nothing.”
     “Uh-huh. It didn’t sound like nothing. Who’s Paul Cranston?” 
     You swallowed hard. “He’s just someone I used to know.”
      A million images flashed through your head. Paul’s face looming over you. The flashing lights and sirens. Waking up in the hospital. 
     You shook yourself out of it. You didn’t want to talk about this now. You swore you’d never talk about it again. “Shouldn’t—shouldn’t we get back to the station. Don’t we have to book this guy?”
     Tim sighed, started the car, and re-entered traffic. You breathed a sigh of relief. 
     “Control, this is 7-Adam-19. I need an ID on a Paul Cranston,” Tim spoke into his radio. 
     And so much for not talking about this now.
     “Can you do that without suspicion of a crime?” You asked him.
     “You can when dispatch loves you.” He winked at you. 
     You rolled your eyes at him as the radio began speaking. 
     “Paul Cranston: caucasian male, date of birth 8/4/92, recently released on parole, history of theft and domestic violence.” 
     Tim turned his gaze to you. “How do you know this man, Boot?”
     “It’s—a long story,” you told him. 
     “Well then you better start talking if you want to finish before we reach the station,” Tim commanded, making a left turn.
     “Can’t you just let it go?” You asked him. “It’s really not that big of a deal.”
      He’s out, and he’s coming for you. 
     You couldn’t fight the shiver that racked your body. 
      Tim’s eyes flicked to you, before returning back to the road. Suddenly, he slammed on the brakes, shifting the car into park before turning to you. 
     “If this is another one of your ‘I’m dying, where are we’ tests—”
     “Boot, focus,” Tim barked. 
     “With all due respect, sir, I don’t think it’s really any of your concern if—”
     “Of course it’s my concern!” Tim shouted. His expression was so intense, you squirmed under his gaze and you felt your face heat. 
     He looked torn for a moment, before sighing and saying, “It’s my job as your TO to train you to the best of my abilities, and I can’t do that if you’re withholding information that may affect your performance as an officer.”
     “Fine,” you breathed. “It was a long time ago. I was 18, Paul and I met freshman year of college. We started dating and things were fine, good even, for a while.”
     “Until?” Tim prompted.
     “Until he got pissed one night because I caught him coming home really late with a ski mask and a bag full of stolen cash. Cliche, right?”
     You looked to Tim, but his expression was as stony as ever and you continued.
     “Apparently, he’d been stealing since high school and turns out he’d lied to me about working in retail and a whole bunch of other stuff. I threatened to call the police if he didn’t stop and—”
     You took a deep breath, steeling yourself.
You watched the houses and trees and cars pass by as you drove towards the station. 
     “—and he hit me. It didn't stop after that—once he knew he could get away with it. He said if I ever told anyone—about the robberies, the beatings—that he’d kill me. And I let him go on like that for months. I was so scared that if I called anyone, he’d make good on his promise.”
     Tim’s grip on the steering wheel tightened, his fingers turning white, but he didn’t speak.
     “But then, one night, it got so bad that I thought he might actually kill me anyway. So I waited until he left the room for a minute and I called 911. He was arrested and—and that’s all I remember before I blacked out. I woke up in the hospital the next morning.”
     You kept your voice even, trying not to let the emotion show through your story. You were just recounting facts. This was almost 10 years ago, and you’d moved on with your life. 
     But reliving it all was hard, even after so much time had passed. 
     “It’s actually why I joined the academy,” you finished. “I wanted to save people, the way the officers that night did for me.”
     You were both silent for a moment. 
     A muscle in Tim’s jaw ticked. “Does the department know?”
     “Yeah,” you sighed. “It’s all part of my file.”
     “And the guy back there?” 
     You shrugged, glancing back at the suspect and lowering your voice. “He must be one of Paul’s partners or goons or—I don’t know. I guess he’s been in contact with him since he was released, if he knows what I look like.”
     The thought made your skin crawl. 
     “I don’t know what came over me,” you kept going. “It’s been years, I just—I didn’t expect to hear about him out of the blue from a criminal on the street, you know? But, I promise it won’t happen again.”
     Tim ignored that. “Do you think it was an empty threat?”
     “I don’t know,” you admitted. “But I sure as hell hope so.”
     Bradford was silent for a long moment, his expression tense.
     The radio crackled to life. “7-Adam-19, we have a 215 in progress near your area, 239 West Armston Street. Respond.” 
     “Negative,” Bradford answered the dispatch call. 
     You stared at him, shocked. “Why aren’t we taking that? We can drop this guy off afterwards.”
     “Yeah, I agree,” the suspect chimed in from the backseat. “I think you should take that first.”
      Tim payed him no attention. “They’ll have someone else over there in minutes. We have more important things to do.”
     “You’re not even going to ask me if I know what a 215 is?” You joked. Tim never passed up an opportunity to quiz you. 
     “What’s a 215, Boot?” 
     “Carjacking.”
     “Correct.” Tim nodded. “And we’re going to have a talk with Sergeant Grey.”
₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚
    “Paul Cranston, released on parole from a thirteen year sentence three days ago, currently believed to be residing in the Woodland Hills area.”
     You sat in the briefing room, surrounded by other officers, as Sergeant Grey read out your ex-boyfriend’s file. You stared into Paul’s face on the screen, his mugshot visible from all angles. 
     Bradford stood near the front of the room, leaning against the wall. 
      “The department is aware of Officer (Y/l/n)’s history with Mr. Cranston,” Grey continued. “And will take necessary action should the situation progress.”
      “So, what’s the course of action here?” Tim crossed his arms. 
     “I’m afraid, as of now, there isn’t one,” Grey said. “Since there is no direct proof against Paul Cranston, we’d essentially be taking the word of a petty thief and wasting resources on what most likely was a desperate attempt to escape arrest. The department doesn’t exactly consider it a threat.”
    “Doesn’t consider it a threat?” Tim’s voice was low and dangerous. “How about a charge for threatening an officer?”
    “But Paul didn’t threaten an officer,” you sighed, thinking. “The armed robbery suspect did.”
     “Exactly, Officer (Y/l/n),” Grey agreed. “Basically, our hands are tied.”
     “Then untie them,” Bradford snapped, beginning to pace. “There’s gotta be some technicality we can get him on. Violation of parole, conspiring with a felon, failure to—”
     “That’s enough, Officer Bradford,” The sergeant fixed your TO with a firm look. “I appreciate your concern for (Y/l/n)’s safety, but we’ve done all we can do. And, for now, that’s nothing.”
      Tim’s concern for your safety. That thought had been in the back of your mind since the ride to the station. You couldn’t figure out why Tim was so determined about this. You supposed you were his rookie and was his job to look out for you. It was just, up until now, he hadn’t exactly done anything to make you believe he’d care so much.
     “Failure to take action could be endangering one of our officers,” Tim said, his jaw clenched. “Who’s to say this guy won’t make good on his threat? At least increase security at (Y/l/n)’s residence.”
     “Tim, its fine,” you said, your voice firm. “Let it go.” 
     They were making a big enough deal about this already. It probably was just a case of a criminal trying anything to get free. You doubted Paul even cared about what happened to you anymore. He probably never wanted to see you again—and that was a good thing. 
     But, then, you couldn’t get those words out of your head.
     He’s out and he’s coming for you.
     Bradford turned to you, his chest rising and falling. He looked so…resolved. Like he did when chasing down a suspect or that time when you’d walked in on him in the training rooms.
     Images of Tim shirtless, the muscles in his back tight as he pushed himself harder filled your head and you quickly shook them away. Definitely not the time. 
   “We’ll send a surveillance team to Paul’s location in the morning,” Grey said, turning to address you. “But for now the best thing you can do is to go home, get some sleep, and not let this rattle you. Understood?”
     “Yes, Sergeant.”
     “Good. Because the last thing the L.A.P.D needs is a cop who lets their personal life get in the way of their ability to do their job in any way that’s less than exemplary. I trust that’s not the case?” 
     You glanced to Bradford, certain he was going to mention your mistake with the suspect earlier. 
     “No, Sir,” Tim said instead. “My rookies don’t do ‘less than exemplary’. Don’t worry about (Y/l/n)—she’s proved to me she has what it takes to be an officer.”
     “Glad to hear it. Shift over. Everybody else, back to work,” Sergeant Grey waved everyone away. 
     You walked towards the front of the room, hearing grumbled complaints about midnight shift from the unlucky officers who still had to do patrol as you did so. 
     You stopped in front of your TO. His eyes were on you, his brow drawn in something that looked like concern.
     “Thanks,” you said. You couldn’t believe he’d told Grey all that—it was the most complimentary thing he’d said about you in your whole time riding with him. 
     “I didn’t say anything that wasn’t true,” Tim stated, shrugging. “I expect you to live up to any praise I’ve given you.”
     “Yes, sir,” you nodded, almost smiling.
     “Besides, you’re being trained by me. You’d have to be royally screwed up not to become one of the best on the force.”
     “And he’s humble too,” you teased. “But I’m going to take that as a compliment.”
     “Whatever, Boot.” Tim smiled, shaking his head. 
     “Be nonchalant all you want,” you said, feeling brave. “I know you like me.”
     For a brief moment, Tim looked like you’d slapped him. But then, the flash of—whatever that was—was gone and his expression was replaced by one of cold indifference. 
     “In your TO not your friend, (Y/l/n),” he stated. “It’s not about liking you. It’s about training you.”
      You sighed inwardly. Just when you thought you were making ground with Tim, he treated you like you’d just met. “Of course, how could I forget.”
     Tim stayed silent. 
    “Well, I should head out,” you told him, “I’ve got a busy night ahead me. You know, trying not to get killed by my ex and all.”
     You’d meant it as a joke, to make light of the situation that left you feeling more uneasy than you’d care to admit. Tim, however, just shook his head and brushed past you, out of the briefing room. 
     You stood there for a moment, trying to work through what had just happened, before turning around and taking a step in the other direction. Only to find Officers Lopez and Bishop standing in front of you, staring between you and Tim’s retreating figure. 
     “So how’d you do it?” Bishop looked you up and down.
     “Do what?” You asked, confused. 
     “Get Tim wrapped around your finger,” Lopez answered for her, smirking. 
     You felt your eyes widen. “Tim’s not—” 
     “Please,” Lopez put her hands on her hips. “I’ve watched him train dozens of rookies and he’s never stood up for any of them like that. So naturally I figured you’re either blackmailing him or sleeping with him.”
     You blanched, feeling the heat rush to your cheeks as you let what Angela said sink in. You knew she was just teasing you, but the statement caught you off guard. You imagined you and Tim—together. It wasn’t necessarily an unpleasant thought. And then you realized what you were thinking and you chided yourself, hurriedly un-imagining it. 
     “No, that’s not—neither one of those things,” you answered quickly. “Trust me, Tim doesn’t give me any special treatment, if that’s what you’re implying. I actually can’t tell if he hates me half of the time.”
     “We’re not implying anything,” Bishop replied. “Only observing. And he doesn’t hate you.”
     “How can you possibly know that?” You were suddenly insecure. You still held on to a secret dread that you were going to wildly disappoint Tim—that you already had. Sure, there was all the stuff he had just said. But there was also months of him being hard on you and saying that you weren’t friends. 
     “Because I’ve seen him hate plenty of people,” Bishop spoke. “And he definitely didn’t look at them the way he looks at you.”
      The way Tim looked at you? You weren’t aware he looked at you in a way that was different from the way he looked at anyone else at the station.
     “What are you guys trying to say?” You asked them. 
     “I’m saying watch out,” Bishop raised an eyebrow. “Because Tim might like you more than he’s willing to let you—or himself—in on.”
     Could there be any truth to what the two officers were saying? Was it wrong for a small part of you to hope there was?
     “Um, ok,” you said, blinking. “I’ll keep that in mind, thanks.”
     “Don’t believe us if you want, it’s your call,” Bishop shrugged, backing up. “But I’m telling you, you mean something to Tim that the rest of us can only guess at.”
     And with that she walked out of the room.
    “Bishop can be intense,” Angela said when the woman was out of earshot. “She’s got that whole ‘anti-cops-dating’ thing going on—but I do think she’s right about this. Tim’s tough, and I’m sure he gives you hell—but it’s not because he doesn’t like you. I actually think it’s quite the opposite. ”
     Was there really something that everyone saw between you and Tim except for you? You still couldn’t even entertain the thought that Tim had feelings for you that were more than TO and rookie. 
     “Well you’ve certainly left me with a lot to think about,” you said finally.
     “Then I’ll let you start thinking—you’re welcome for the peace of mind.” 
     You wouldn’t have used the phrase peace of mind, yourself. Sure, it was nice to know that the officers who had known your TO for years were confident that he didn’t look down on you. But, this conversation also had left your head swimming with conflicting thoughts about Tim that you didn’t feel like dealing with right now.
     “And take care,” Lopez said knowingly. “We have your back if anything happens.”
      With that, your thoughts slammed back to the current situation.
    “Right, that. You—you think something’s going to happen?” You asked, trying to sound casual.
     “I think in this job we have to be prepared for the worst,” she corrected. “But I also think that bastard would have to be pretty stupid to mess with you.”
     She smiled at you and you smiled back. After watching her leave, you followed her path, heading towards the locker rooms.
     You thought about what she had said about you and Tim, about Paul.
     You hoped she was right—you just couldn’t say which you hoped she was more right about.
₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚
     Your thoughts bounced between your conversation with Talia and Angela and the message from your ex as you walked to your car minutes later. 
     When you woke up this morning, you thought the most stressful part of your day would’ve been a police chase or a shootout.  You never would’ve expected it to be my ex-boyfriend is out of jail and could be hunting me down and my training officer might have feelings for me.
     Funny how things could change so fast.
     Suddenly, you heard a bang. You spun around quickly, your heart in your throat. But it was only a car door being slammed shut from across the parking lot. 
     Get a grip, you told yourself. 
     You rounded the corner, running a hand through your hair.
     You stopped. Tim was leaning against the side of your car, arms crossed in front of his chest. He looked you up and down.
     “What are you doing?” You asked. 
     “Driving you home, Boot,” Tim said. “Get in the car.”
     “Tim, you don’t have to—”
     “That wasn’t a question, give me the keys.”
     There was no point in fighting him. Besides, there was a small part of you that didn’t really want to fight him. 
     You tossed him the keys to your car and got in the passenger seat with a sigh.  
     Tim started the engine. 
     “If this is about Paul, this really isn’t necessary,” you said after you’d been driving for several minutes and the silence became too much. “I can handle myself. I am an officer, in case you forgot.”
     “You’re a rookie,” Tim corrected, eyes never leaving the road. “And if the department won’t do anything, then I will.”
     “What—we’re not going to go looking for him, are we?” You asked.
     “Of course not,” Tim scoffed. “I’m not a vigilante, Boot. Where do you live?”
     “Take a left at the light,” you guided. 
     Neither of you talked for the remainder of the drive, save your occasional directions. When you pointed out your apartment building, Tim parked the car and handed you the keys. 
     “Thanks,” you mumbled to him as you got out of the car, grabbing your bag and heading towards the building.
     You heard a door shut behind you and turned to find your TO standing on the sidewalk, an eyebrow raised.
     “You didn’t think I was just going to let you spend the night alone with a target on your head, did you, Boot?” 
     “Tim—”
     “No more protests,” he said firmly. “As your TO, I—”
     “No, I was just going to say that if you were planning on staying here, why couldn’t I have just driven my own car?”
     “I don’t let my rookies drive,” Tim walked past you and to the front door. “Even off-duty.”
     You followed him quickly, getting out your key and letting you both in.
     When you reached your apartment you did a quick scan of the space—it wasn’t exactly like you’d been expecting company, much less your training officer. You cringed at the messiness.
      “How many entrances and exits are there?” Bradford asked. 
     “Um, just the front door. And there’s windows in the kitchen and the bedroom,” you said. 
     You skimmed past everything in the place, looking towards the window in your bedroom. Your eye caught on one of your bras hanging from your bedpost. You quickly ran over and shut the door, blushing and hoping Tim hadn’t noticed.
     “Please, Boot,” Tim made a face. “It’s nothing I haven’t already seen before.”
     “Ok no offense, but I usually don’t let guys see my bra the first time I bring them to my place,” you joked.
     “If that’s an offer, I’m going to have to politely decline.”
     “What—no,” you hurried out, worried your voice sounded wrong. “I just meant—”
    Tim interrupted. “I’m going to do a sweep of the place, make sure everything’s as it should be.”
     “Is that really needed?”
     “I’m not taking any chances.” He left the room and you sunk down onto the couch, letting your bag fall to the floor. 
     Your TO returned a few minutes later. “All clear.”
     “See, everything’s fine,” you said, speaking just as much to yourself as you were to Tim. 
     “Well,” Bradford started, amusement in his eyes. “I wouldn’t say everything is fine. Your storage closet’s a fire hazard.”
     Had Tim Bradford just made a joke?
     “I’ll be sure not to exit through the closet in the events of a fire,” you said sarcastically. “And if you keep insulting my living space, I’m going to be forced to kick you out.”
     “Bold for someone whose career I could end.”
     “You can’t end my career for that,” you shot back. Paused. “Can you?”
     Tim raised his eyebrows.
     “Only one way to find out,” you said enthusiastically, teasing him now. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Don’t let the closet trap you on the way out.
     “Nice try, Boot. But you’re still stuck with me for,” Tim checked his watch. “eight hours.”
     “Nine hours,” you corrected. You had to leave for work in nine hours.
     “You’re right, I should get us drinks,” Tim joked.
     You rolled you eyes and he shot you a look. “Help yourself to anything in the fridge.”
     Tim got up, disappearing into the kitchen.  
     “Is all you own ginger ale, Boot?” He called. 
     “There’s six year old tequila in the cupboard,” you suggested.
     “Ginger ale it is.”
      Tim joined you in the living room again, carrying two bottles. He handed one to you, sitting down on the opposite side of the couch. 
     You noted the careful distance he put between you. 
     “What’s this thing made of, Boot? Plywood?” Tim asked, inspecting the couch.
     You smothered a laugh.
     “Get comfortable. It’s where you’re sleeping,” you answered. 
     “Won’t be necessary. If you’re not awake you’re not aware.”
     “So, what, we’re taking shifts on guard like this is a stakeout?” You asked.
     “Don’t be ridiculous. I didn’t come here to sleep.”
     “Tim I can’t let you stay up all night while I’m unconscious.” you sighed.
     “You can if it’s an order. Besides, no offense, but rookies are historically less vigilant and have a slower response time…” 
     You tried not to take offense at that. “Right, Eagle Eye.”
     Tim glared at you. 
     “Angela told me.”
     “Of course she did. And at least I didn’t leave valuable evidence on the street to chase after a dog wearing a top hat.”
     “Sparky could’ve been involved in the crime,” you said, indignant. “And that was one time!”
     “One time too many,” Tim mumbled, lifting the bottle to his lips, his eyes sparkling. 
     “Ok, so when you were a rookie you were, what, perfect?” You shot back.
     “Damn straight.” Tim nodded. 
     “You made no mistakes, at all?” You prompted.
     “Well,” Tim took a sip of his drink. “There was one thing.”
     “Aside from the graffiti incident?”
     “That wasn’t a mistake because it wasn’t my fault. I was following direct orders and—you know what, never mind. If you don’t want to hear it—”
     “No, no, I do!” you scooted towards the edge of your seat in anticipation. “And none of that ‘I worked too hard and too efficiently’ crap.”
     “Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said sarcastically. “My first week on the job I was put on paperwork duty, which was—”
     “Boring and tedious? I can imagine,” you deadpanned, having been put in charge of paperwork by Tim many times.
     “I was going to say necessary and a valuable skill to have,” Bradford corrected. “But anyways, we had just got done booking a couple suspects and I was working on the reports. A triple homicide and a prostitution case. It was a long day and I was tired and I guess I got sloppy—”
     “You? Sloppy?” You interrupted.
     “Do you want me to tell you this story or not?”
     “Right, sorry. Continue.”
     Tim did. “I’d just finished tagging the evidence for both cases and when I was filling everything out I somehow got the numbers mixed up. Long story short, according to my report, the homicide gun ended up being linked to the prostitution case and the weapon allegedly used in the triple homicide was…a pair of pink, fluffy handcuffs.”
      You couldn’t stop the laugh that escaped you now.
     “Forensics caught it before it was sent to the judge, thank god,” Bradford sighed. “But the next day when I was getting ready for my shift, I was greeted by dozens of similar handcuffs in my locker—apparently Smitty has a guy.”
     “Tell me you kept them,” you begged, pulling your knees up to your chest.
     “Of course not!”
     Tim blinked.
     “Well, not all of them—Isabel made me take a pair home. I found out later that she was the one who orchestrated the whole prank. She used to do stuff like that all the time before she, uh,—”
     “Tim—”
     You’d heard about Bradford’s ex-wife. How she’d become an addict, gotten herself mixed up with bad people. You knew how much it had affected Tim, even if he hadn’t said so. 
     She was in rehab now, getting her life back together. You were glad she was finally getting the help she needed. Still, you knew how much she meant to Tim. How much it had hurt him to move on from her and let her start a new life without him. 
     “I’m fine.” Tim said firmly, clearing his throat. “It’s good to talk about her…before. She’s on the right path now.”
     You stared at the ground in front of you, picking at your fingernails. 
     “Are you still in love with her?” The question was out of your mouth before you could stop it. You didn’t know why you asked—didn’t know why you cared what the answer was. Ten minutes ago you wouldn’t have even dared to ask that question.  
     But he was being so uncharacteristically open and you seemed to be getting along well. You reluctantly brought your eyes up to Tim.
     His eyes had gone wide. He looked like he wanted to leave or yell at you or both, and you immediately regretted it.
     But then his eyes softened and he opened his mouth. “No. I’ll always care about her and she’ll always be someone that I did love. But relationships change—people change.”
     You nodded. “I get it—I mean, I’m kind of rusty on relationships—but I get it. I actually haven’t dated anyone since Paul. I guess it was just hard to trust someone after that. I kind of sabotaged any relationship that had any chance of starting.”
     It was the first time you’d admitted that to anyone. You wouldn’t have pegged Tim as being so easy to talk to. You had almost forgotten about the whole Paul situation before you’d just brought him up. You had been enjoying hanging out with Tim, no matter the circumstances. He was actually pleasant to be around when he wasn’t on the clock. 
     You imagined this happening more often—you and Tim, not just coworkers but friends. Maybe even more. Maybe this was one relationship you didn’t have to end before it started.
     You dared to let yourself think about it. You watched Tim process your words. Saw the emotion clearly written in his face as he looked at you intensely. 
     “Hey, thanks again for not letting me be alone tonight,” you told him, you’re voice soft. 
     “Don’t take it personally, Boot,” he said. “My house is being repainted and even your place beats breathing in paint fumes all night.”
     “I’m honored,” you laughed, rolling your eyes. “But you have to admit this has been fun—hanging out.”
     Your little impromptu sleepover. You smiled.
     Tim, however, looked like a switch had been flipped inside of him. You watched as he clenched his jaw, leaning almost imperceptibly away from you 
     “Listen, Boot—”
     He was cut off by the sound of breaking glass and a loud thumping sound. 
     You both shot up off the couch, abandoning your drinks. Tim’s hand went to his gun. You did the same. 
     Tim turned to you. “Stay here.”
     “Like hell,” you shot back, following him as he started to do a sweep of the main room.
     If that sound was someone—Paul—breaking in, you weren’t going to sit here and let Bradford fight your battles for you. 
     He signaled to let you know he was moving to the kitchen. You nodded, following. 
     “Clear,” he muttered, and moved on towards the bathroom. You were right behind him when you heard another noise, like the muffled sound of scraping of furniture, and you spun around.
     The bedroom. It was the only room in that direction that you hadn’t checked yet. 
     You glanced to Tim, but he hadn’t heard it. He was a few feet ahead of you, just now entering the bathroom. 
     You slowly stepped away from him and made your way across the apartment, down the hall and over to the closed bedroom door.
     Holding your weapon in one hand, you opened the door with the other. But, you barely had time to see what was on the other side before you were grabbed and a cloth was shoved into your mouth. 
     Your gun was ripped from your hand, and you were pushed hard onto the ground. Your wrist burned where you landed on shards of glass from the broken window
     Something smacked into the back of your head and you were dragged and thrown onto the bed on the corner. You heard the door shut. 
     Squinting up into the light, rubbing your throbbing head, your heart dropped as you saw who was in front of you. 
     “Did you miss me?” Paul sneered, spinning your gun in his hand. 
     You froze. Everything crashed into you at once. The events of the last time you saw your ex-boyfriend sped through your mind. Suddenly, you were scared and 18 again, at the mercy of this man. 
     “I guess you got my man’s message,” Paul continued. “Because you don’t exactly look shocked to see me. Scared, of course, but not shocked.”
     Coming back to yourself, you scrambled up onto your knees, ready to knock him out.
     Paul shook his head, laughing. “No, no. If you move even an inch I’ll shoot you right in the forehead.”
     You sat back down, your heart thumping in your chest as you scanned the room for a way out. Some way to get the upper hand on him. You had been trained for this.
     “Listen to me,” he continued, his hand coming to the gag in your mouth. You flinched away from him. “I know there’s someone in here with you. If you try to scream to alert them, I will also shoot you.  I’d like to play with you first before I put a bullet in your brain but, hey, I’m not picky. Is that clear?”
     You nodded, trying to measure how fast you could knock the weapon out of his hand before he could take a shot at you. Paul took the cloth out of you mouth.
     You gasped in air. “Backup’s going to be in here any second and then you’re going back to prison.”
     Tim would notice you were gone. He had to. 
     “Oh, I don’t think so,” Paul smiled. “I’ll be long gone and you’ll be long dead before that happens.”
     You glanced towards the door. What was taking him so long?
     Suddenly, Paul reached forwards and gripped your face in his hand. “Just as beautiful as I remember. It was such a shame things had to end with us as they did. How did that happen again? Oh, that’s right. You betrayed me.”
     “And that was the best decision I ever made,” you spat. 
     Paul backed up, shaking his head. “You’ve gotten feistier, baby. It’ll make this so much more fun for me.”
     He stepped back towards you, his face inches from yours, sneering. “This’ll be just like old times.”
     Bam! The door to your bedroom busted open. Bradford rushed in, taking in the situation. You breathed a sigh of relief.
     “Get down on the ground!” Tim growled.
     Paul froze for only a second, fear flashing across his face, but it was enough. You lunged, wrestling the gun out of his hands, your wrist protesting. 
     You trained it on him. Paul was surrounded.
     “You have five seconds to get on the ground before I shoot you,” Tim bit out, his expression murderous.
     “Come on, baby, you’re not going to let Officer Buzzkill treat me like that, are you?” Paul appealed to you. 
     You leveled your gaze on him, ignoring his words. “You heard him. Get on the ground.”
     Paul slowly knelt, never taking his eyes off of you. Tim charged him, pulling out handcuffs and locking them around his wrists. 
    You took a moment to be amused—of course Tim had off-duty cuffs. 
    “So this ends the way it starts, huh?” Paul shook his head. “You getting me locked up?”
     “Just like old times,” you echoed his earlier statement. You stayed stoic, putting your hands on your hips to hide the way they shook.
    Anger sparked in Paul’s eyes before he took on a smug expression. “You’re right. You’re the same girl you were when I met you. You haven’t changed a bit.”
     “Don’t listen to him, Boot,” Tim warned hauling the man up off the ground. 
     “You know I’m right,” Paul’s manic eyes bore into yours. He was enjoying every moment of this, laughter in his tone. It took all that was in you to keep your expression blank, unaffected. “You’ll always be that person I knew—the person who loved me. Because you did—love me. You could’ve walked away. But you didn’t. You just took it all like the victim you are. You pathetic bitch—”
      He was cut off abruptly as Tim slammed him face-first against the wall. Paul cried out.
     “That’s enough!” Tim shouted. “If you ever threaten—no, if you even look at (Y/l/n) again, I will hunt you down and personally remove every external limb from your body, do you understand me? (Y/n) is a million times the person you will ever be and you don’t get to make her feel small. If I didn’t think sitting in a cell for the rest of your life was a worse fate, I’d kill you right now—screw the department.”
     Your ears were ringing, your head dizzy as you tried to ground yourself. Your voice came out tiny. “Tim, stop.”
     Bradford turned to you, almost as if he had forgotten you were in the room. He was breathing hard, his fists clenched around the man in custody. 
     “And she’s not a victim,” Tim whispered, turning back to Paul, his voice right by his ear. “She’s a survivor.”
     With that, he shoved Paul back to the ground and moved over to you, his eyes roaming over your face. Your body. He took the gun out of your hands, setting it on the desk. Then, he gripped your injured wrist and you winced as he inspected it.
     “Probably hurts like hell, but you won’t need stitches. Any other injuries?”
     “Um, he hit me in the back of the head,” you felt your scalp, a lump already forming.
     Tim’s hands moved to your hair, his touch gentle, his breath on your cheek as he leaned to get a better look.
     Your own breath caught, your heart racing at the intimacy of your position. 
     “What’s the damage?” You almost whispered.
     Tim’s eyes met yours, the heat of his stare spreading through your body. “You’ll have a nasty bruise, but there’s no external bleeding.”
     Tim stepped back, and you found yourself wishing he hadn’t.
     “Are you—are you ok, Boot?” He asked carefully. 
     How did you even answer that question? You were still in shock, unable to process what had just happened. 
     “I will be,” you settled on, breathing in slowly. Exhaling.
      Tim looked like he wanted to say more but he clenched his jaw, glancing in the direction of Paul, who had been uncharacteristically silent. Maybe he had finally accepted his defeat. 
     “I’m going to call for back up, you go clean that up,” Tim gestured to the blood covering your wrist where you had landed in the broken glass. “You need help?”
     “No, I got it,” You nodded, walking towards the bathroom as you heard Tim make the call.
     “911, what’s your emergency?”
     “This is off-duty officer Tim Bradford, badge 34831. I need a unit to my location for a 126. Suspect in custody. Code 4.”
      Tim’s voice faded as you made your way down the hall, shutting the bathroom door after you to access the medicine cabinet behind it.
     You took out the necessary supplies and began cleaning the wound. You stopped in front of the sink, letting your burning eyes close for a moment, massaging your temples. 
     Now that you were alone, you let yourself collapse, bracing your hands against the counter 
     Images flooded your senses. 
     The gag. Paul hitting you from behind. You, young and frightened, huddled on the ground. That gleam in his eyes.
     Your eyes snapped open, your breath coming out fast.
     He’s in custody. You told yourself. He can’t hurt you anymore. 
     You looked at your reflection in the mirror staring wearily back at you, your hands still shaking as you brushed your hair back from your face. Was it hot in here or was it just you?
      Turning your attention back to your wrist, you took a deep breath and continued to dab at the wound.
      You reached for the bandages on the counter. A sheen of sweat broke out on your forehead as you wrapped your arm. 
      You pictured Paul’s grip on you. His words rang in your ears. 
     You’re the same girl you were when I met you. You haven’t changed a bit.
     The room tilted. You swayed on your feet so you sunk down to the ground, leaning your head against the cabinet, the cool wood pressing against your head. 
     You tried to slow your erratic breathing but you couldn’t. You couldn’t—
     The sound of footsteps and voices carried through the door. You were vaguely aware that it was probably the backup here to take Paul away.
     You closed your eyes, your throat tight, you pulse thundering in your ears.
     I’m ok, you tried to tell yourself. I’m ok. I’m ok.
     You were unaware how long you sat like this. You had no concept of time. Your thoughts were wild, images flashing in and out, unable to form conscious ideas. Every breath sending a sharp pain through your body. 
     “Boot?”
     The muffled voice was closer than the others had been. 
     “Boot?” The voice was louder now. You registered Tim at the door. He knocked once. Twice. 
     “Boot, I’m coming in,” he shouted, his voice laced with worry. The door was shoved open. 
     “Dammit,” he cursed, seeing your state. You felt him getting closer to you, but you didn’t look up as he knelt by you, his concerned expression taking in yours.
     “Hey, look at me,” Tim coaxed. “(Y/l/n), breathe.”
     He seemed miles and miles away. There was a pause.
     “Hey, Boot, I got another test for you,” he spoke quickly, gently placing a hand on your shoulder. “I want you to tell me the most annoying person we work with.”
     “What?” You rasped, barely hearing him. 
    “Bishop’s an easy target,” he said. “And Lopez is a slob, so you can’t go wrong there. West’s got the whole daddy issues thing. Don’t even get me started on Nolan—”
     You swallowed hard, your mouth feeling dry.
     “And then there’s me. I mean, I’m annoying right?”
     You breathed a shaky laugh, opening your eyes slowly. 
     Tim smiled. “Oh so you agree? It’s ok, Boot, you can say me. Go ahead, I can take it.”
     When you didn’t say anything, Tim kept talking. “Personally I’d go for Detective Coleman. The man makes double what I do and I’m convinced he doesn’t own a decent looking tie.”
     “L-like the—the green one from last week,” you managed, trying to slow your breathing.
     “Leprechauns would call it tacky,” Tim agreed. “Now, since we’ve discussed this from all angles I’m going to need you to choose wisely. Because this is going to go on your evaluation for today.”
     You gulped. “Are—are you going to get me fired if I say you?”
     Tim let out a quiet, relieved laugh. “I knew it. Guess who’s going back to long-sleeves on Monday?”
     “In this heat wave? You—you wouldn’t dare,” you joked, sniffing.
     “I don’t know, I am the most annoying person you work with—sounds like something I might do.”
     You laughed again, this time the sound coming out less strained. You focused on taking deep breaths, feeling your heart rate return to normal. 
     “There you go.” Tim stood up, offering his hand to you for the second time that day. You gripped his arm as he pulled you up onto shaky legs.
     “Thanks,” you mumbled, embarrassed to have had your TO see you like this now that your head was clearer. 
     “For what, doing my job?”
     You smiled weakly at him, running a hand along your forehead. “Sorry for um—”  
     “Having a normal reaction to a highly emotional situation? Don’t apologize for being human,” Tim said firmly, his forehead creased.
     “So, he’s gone?” You’re voice came out small.
     Tim’s expression softened. “He’s gone.”
     You nodded again, looking at the floor.  Tim sighed, reaching an arm out. “Come here.”
You took a step towards him and then you were in his arms, his embrace strengthening you as he rubbed your back. You stood there like that, not wanting this to end. Not wanting to put distance between you again. Finally, he pulled back and looked down at you, his gaze weighted, before taking a few steps towards the door. You looked over Tim’s shoulder.
     “Hey, (Y/n), look at me.” Tim said. You brought your gaze up to meet his. “He is never going to hurt you again, ok? I’ll make sure of that.”
      You let your eyes fall closed, feeling ashamed that you had been so affected. That Tim had to handle all of this for you. “I know. And I’ll understand if after…all this, you don’t see me fit to—to be a police officer anymore.”
     Tim’s eyes hardened, his voice hardening with them. “With all do respect, Boot, that’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever said. I meant every word of what I said back there—you’re a survivor. All I saw tonight is that you are a brave and intelligent woman who just so happens to have a scumbag of an ex-boyfriend. Don’t let it define you because then he wins. You’re a great cop, (Y/l/n). It’s rookies like you who make the force as strong as it is.”
     You listened to Tim speak. He sounded so…passionate. Bishop’s words came back to you.
     Tim might like you more than he’s willing to let you—or himself—in on.
     You desperately wanted that to be true, now more than ever. He’d been so kind to you in this past hour—staying with you, rescuing you, reassuring you, bringing you back from whatever dark place you had just been in. 
     And then this. Talking about you like he…like he really cared about you. And maybe it was just because he felt like as your training officer he had to protect you. But in the moment, it felt like maybe it could be more than that. 
    “So what I’m hearing is, I’m getting a promotion?” You teased finally, brushing your hair back from your damp face, breaking the silence. 
     Bradford put up a hand. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, you still have a lot to learn from me.”
     You sighed. This was normal, this was comfortable. How you and Tim always acted with each other. You were both relieved and disappointed at the change back into familiar territory. 
     You ran a hand through your hair, stifling a yawn. Saying today had been a long day would’ve been the understatement of the century.
     “Now come on,” Tim flicked his head in the direction of the door. “It’s way past my bedtime.”
     “Let me guess, nine p.m. sharp every night?” You teased.
     “That’s not true.”
     You raised an eyebrow at him.
     “Nine-thirty,” he admitted. 
     You giggled, following Tim out of the bathroom and into the hallway which led to the living room.
     You glanced at your bedroom as you passed it, trying not to think about what had happened in there. It was over now, you told yourself. 
     “Since my room is kind of a crime scene, I guess we’re both crashing out here,” you sighed, gesturing to the couch. 
      Silence filled the room and you immediately realized your mistake, cheeks flaming. 
     “Or, right, I guess you can go now. Danger’s over.”
     “Are you kidding?” Tim said. “And get to bed even later? I’m not going anywhere.”
     You stepped into the living room. You were glad Tim was staying. You felt safer with him here, even though you knew it was irrational. 
     “I’ll get the blankets and stuff,” you said, turning back the way you’d came.
     “Let me go with you,” Tim offered.
     “I would but they’re in the closet and I don’t want it to trap you or something,” you said. 
     “You think I can’t take a closet full of your crap? Bring it on,” Tim challenged and you led him down the hall. 
     A few minutes later you returned to the living room, blankets and pillows in tow. Tim helped you pull out the couch bed—you were grateful you’d opted for this couch instead of a regular one—and you stood back, admiring your work. 
     “Take the couch,” you told him. “It was your bed originally.”
     “Not gonna happen.” Tim crossed his arms. “It’s your house. And you’re injured.”
     “I’m fine. And where are you going to sleep? The floor?” You asked him. 
     Tim scanned the room and then sat down on the chair across from the couch-turned-bed. 
     “Are you sure you’re ok on that?” You asked. It didn’t exactly look comfortable for spending hours on.
     “Trust me, Boot, you got the short end of the stick. Have fun sleeping on plywood.” 
      You smiled. “So, what, you’re just going to sit over there and watch me sleep?”
     “I can leave, if you’re—”
     “No,” you’re voice came out faster and more sharp than you’d intended. “I mean, you came all this way, I don’t want you to have to get an Uber home at this hour.”
     You climbed into bed, aware that you were still in your clothes, but not caring enough to change. 
     “We should get some sleep, it’s been a long night,” Tim sighed. He got up and turned the lights off, darkness filling the room. 
     “Damn, boot,” you heard Tim’s voice even though you couldn’t see him anymore. “It’s pitch black in here. You don’t sleep with a light or anything?”
     “Well I don’t usually sleep in my living room,” you pointed out. Then you stifled a laugh. “Wait a minute. Is Officer Tim Bradford afraid of the dark?”
     Tim scoffed. “I’m not afraid of the dark.”
     “Your secret’s safe with me,” you teased.
     “There is no secret,” Tim shot back.
     You winked. “Exactly.”
     “You’re impossible.”
     “Thank you.” You smiled.
     The room fell silent. You heard him sit back down. 
     You laid back, staring up at the ceiling. The seconds ticked by. 
    “Do you—do you think he really would’ve shot me?” You asked, finally.
     “I don’t know,” Tim admitted. “He clearly thought you guys had unfinished business. But guys like that get high on fear—on desperation. He couldn’t have that if you were dead. In his mind, he’d be losing his power over you.”
     He paused. 
     “Besides, I don’t think he would’ve gotten the chance,” Tim said. “He clearly underestimated the badass-ness of his opponent.”
     You snorted. “Did you just say ‘badass-ness’?”
     “It’s a word!” Tim defended. 
     You laughed, turning over on your side. 
     “But seriously, if you ever need anything, you can always talk to me,” Tim said, sounding earnest. “I mean it.”
     “I may just take you up on that,” you responded. “Do you tell that to all your rookies?”
     You could barely make out Tim’s frame in the dark. “No, not all of them.”
     “I’m going to take that as I’m special,” you said. 
     Your next words were out of your mouth before you could stop them.   
    “You know, Lopez and Bishop had this crazy idea that you had feelings for me,” you said, staring up at the ceiling. “But I told them it was just that—crazy.”
     Tim didn’t speak.
     “It is crazy right?” You asked. You had to know. He still was silent. “Right?”
     “Boot, look—” Bradford started. His voice came out rough, as if he hadn’t talked in days. Your heartbeat was a deafening roar in your ears. 
     “Tim?”
     You could hear more than see Tim’s movements. He stood, pacing the length of the room. Sat back down. Stood up again. Sat. 
     “Dammit, Boot, I can’t do this,” he finished. “I can’t do this right now, (Y/n).”
     Your pulse quickened. He hadn’t denied it. 
     You stood up. 
     And maybe it was having to deny your attraction to your TO for seven months. Maybe it was the adrenaline still coursing through your veins from the attack earlier. Maybe it was because the darkness felt safe and secret—made you feel like you could do anything. Maybe you were just too eager after his small encouragement—or, lack of discouragement.
     But, whatever the reason, you walked over to where Tim sat, kneeled down, looked into his confused, strained eyes, and kissed him. 
     Tim froze, his lips still against yours. And then, almost as if he was afraid you would vanish or startle, he placed his hand gingerly on your waist, and leaned into the kiss.
     And he was kissing you back. Tim Bradford was kissing you back. 
     His free hand went to your hair, deepening the kiss as he gripped you closer. He kissed you like he had been waiting a lifetime.
     It was desperate and raw and passionate—it was perfect.
     You broke apart, both gasping for breath.       
     “Listen, Boot,” Tim started. You watched his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed. “You’ve had a long and confusing day—”
     You interrupted him. “Yeah. Yeah, I have. But I’m not confused about this.”
     You brought your lips to his again. This time he didn’t hold back. He pulled you closer to him and you felt the warmth of him through his shirt. 
     When you came apart again, he was smiling. 
     “Well, I guess I can check thinking that you hate me off my daily checklist,” you whispered. 
     “I don’t hate you, Boot,” Tim said. “I actually hate how much I don’t hate you.”
     You studied the planes of his face, the light from the hallway illuminating his eyes. His lips. His jawline.
     “Boot—”
     “If you’re going to say that this is a bad idea, I don’t want to hear it. Not tonight,” you said. 
     “I thought that was obvious.” Tim stated matter-of-factly. “I was going to say actually I’d appreciate it if you did turn on a lamp or something, because—”
     You laughed, kissing him again. 
     “But seriously,” Tim continued. “You know we can’t do this.”
     “Why not?” You pouted. “If it’s what we both want.”
     “It’s not about what we want—we could be putting both of our careers in jeopardy.”
     You knew he was right. Of course he was right. 
     “But is it—what you want?” 
     “God yes,” Tim blurted, standing up, his voice strained. “It’s what I’ve wanted from the moment I started training you. Do you know how hard it’s been trying to put distance between us and deny every damn thing when all I wanted to do was—”
     He broke off, running a hand along his hair. 
     “Then do it.” Your heart pounded in your chest. “You’ll only be my TO for a few more months, we’ll just keep it a secret until then. No one has to know.”
     Tim looked at you. 
     “Ok you’re right, Bishop and Lopez will totally know something’s up,” you admitted.
     “I guess I’ll just have to transfer,” Tim joked.
     “What happened to ‘Tim Bradford finished what he starts’?” You asked.
     “Oh I intend to do just that,” Tim whispered. “Are we really thinking about doing this?”
     You thought about the consequences you could face—Tim could face—if it got out that you and your training officer were romantically involved. You knew it would be a huge risk—one that could get you cut from the program.
     You looked at Tim. He was watching you like he never wanted to let you go again. You thought about how long you’d wanted this, even if you didn’t fully know it until tonight.
     And the decision seemed clear.
     “Yeah,” you beamed. “Yeah I think we are.”
     He cupped your face in his hand, his fingers warm against the back of your neck. Your eyes closed against his touch. You felt comfort for the first time in hours.
     “You need rest,” Tim whispered and your eyes fluttered open. “As much as I’d love to do this all night.”
     You nodded, backing up towards your bed. Tim ran a hand through his hair again and then sat back down in the armchair.
    “What’re you doing?” You asked him.
    “Going to bed,” Tim answered, as if it was obvious. 
    “Get over here,” you gestured, rolling your eyes at him.
    “I was hoping you’d say that,” Tim smiled. 
     You climbed into bed beside him, pulling the covers over both of you.
     You lay your head on Bradfords chest. You could feel his heartbeat in your ear as you closed your eyes.     
    “You know, this will kind of be like doing undercover work—minus the threat of getting killed,” you said. 
     “I don’t know about that—I wouldn’t put anything past an angry Sergeant Grey.”
     “We’ll just have to be so in-character that we never find out,” you said. 
     “I’ll make sure to be extra tough on you next shift,” Tim agreed. 
     “And that’s different from any other day how?” You shot back, sitting up. 
     “Hey, training rookies is a sacred duty and I take that very seriously. If you think I’m going to throw your education out the window simply because—”
     You shut him up by pressing your lips to his. You echoed his earlier words. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”
     Tim shook is head slightly, eyes roaming over your face. 
     “What?” You asked.
     “You’re so beautiful, (Y/n),” Tim breathed. “I’m so glad I can finally tell you that.”
     “Me too,” you said. “Even if it took…this for it to happen.”
     “Speaking of which, maybe I’ll take a sick day tomorrow,” Tim said. “Since there’s no way Grey—or myself—is letting you go to work. What’d you say?”
     You wanted to fight him, say you were fine and you could make it to your shift the next day. But the promise of taking a sick day with Tim was to tempting to pass up. 
     “I say I’m glad your house is being repainted,” you teased. “Because then you’ll have to stay with me.”
     Tim smiled knowingly. “My house isn’t being repainted, Boot. And I’m all yours.”
     You grinned, laying back down and resting your head back against Tim. He wrapped his arm around your shoulder.
     You felt safe, protected in his arms. 
     The rest would come. Dealing with what had happened tonight. Starting your secret relationship with Tim. Eventually facing everyone at work who had heard the news and would want to ask if you were ok. And you would be ok.
     But for now, this was enough. He was enough. 
     “Tim?” You whispered.
     “Hmm?”
     You struggled for words to fit the gravity of what you were feeling for him. “Thanks for…everything.”
     “What are TOs for,” Tim shrugged. 
     “Apparently keeping the night light business afloat.” You giggled at the look on Bradford’s face. 
     “Shut it, Boot.”
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ˋ°•*⁀➷ hope you enjoyed loves!! i’m so down bad for tim it’s not even funny 😵‍💫
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